#I can't promise anything though!!! I have my fingers crossed I'll have enough time do it' but I honestly don't know | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

soraviie · 1 year

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you compare yourself to him 2.txt

━ type: bts x f! reader ━ navigation ━ part I here

━ about: angst atop of angst and some fluff

━ a/n: Bacchus here is a reference to a Korean energy drink in Yoongi's part. Jimin's part is my own favourite one :)

━ previously posted on soraviii

NAMJOON: The world is...beige. Since when? Blinking away the heavy grogginess, you reach to touch the material on your face before removing it. Looking around one might think you'd slept through the whole warfare as every surface is covered in clothes. Amidst the maelstrom like a blur in the wind is Namjoon, tossing everything he could find all around. You reach to hook a finger around a silver chain necklace inexplicably dangling on a bedside lamp. You remember this one. You'd gifted him this in Tartu on a whim of being overwhelmingly lovesick for his dimples.

"Are you fleeing the country?" you rasp, voice falling gruff from the disuse. It had been...hard to talk after the gallery. Or look at yourself in the mirror. Or leave the bed.

At the sound of your voice, Namjoon whips around, accidentally pulling along with him a lightbox. Dimly you watch it clatter on the ground.

"Baby! Hello! Did you sleep well?" he asks with an eagerness of a zealous labrador and you frown.

"Well enough. Have you gone mad? Perhaps?"

He laughs as though this simple remark was the finest joke in the land.

"No, I'm very focused and logical," he chirps and your frown deepens. No way his brain was not harmed somehow. This was...suspicious to say the least.

"Listen, I'm going to be on the TV today -"

"You always are," dryly you point out but then he crawls on the bed and practically sticks his face into yours, so close you go cross-eyed.

"Make sure you watch it, okay? It'll be a live. Starts at 3."

"Okay," flustered you comply and as his breath fans your face the suspicion surges. "How many energy drinks have you had?"

"Nine!"

Your eyes pop open but you can't do much about it as he glimpsed down, finds the necklace glimmering between your fingers and lets out a jubilant cry.

"I've been looking for this thing! Thank you!" he begins leaving rushed kisses all over your face, graciously ignoring any protests. "Thank you, baby! My moon and stars!"

Was he drunk as well?

Pulling back just as haphazardly he glanced at the clock, breathing a horrified gasp.

"Oh, shit, I'm late! But the mess..." he tosses a guilty glimpse at the destroyed closet before you push him.

"I'll..I'll clean it, just go."

You had little to do anyway, not like you could go to a gallery to have worldly people fun. At that, a natural scoff worms upon your face.

"Thank you! I love you! I love you so much!" he yelps and presses himself fervently against you, capturing your lips in a sloppy, frantic kiss. The taste of energy drinks spills onto your mouth. The next you know, your boyfriend becomes Sonic and is out of the door leaving nothing but destruction in his wake.

Typical.

You're still folding some pants when reluctantly the weight of the promise burdens you too much and end up switching the TV, knowing in your heart that seeing him in his role as an idol, you'll only feel more distant. What sort of girlfriend tunes into the TV to see their boyfriend not just call them? What sort of girlfriend were you at all? You frown at the leg of the pants, bunching it in your palms before releasing it. A lame one. You were a lame girlfriend.

It couldn't be said that this interview was anything else that you hadn't seen and heard hundred times before but one thing does stick out like red in a sea of mourners. Namjoon looks like a goddamn patchwork game. You can squint and frown, an action which is done by many, including the interviewer, his band, and the camera operator probably as well. The look presented makes it seem he was blind, drunk, and high when choosing his clothes and also made that choice in a closet belonging to a crazy person. Green baggy pants, a red turtleneck, a white, little scarf, a beret and the necklace proudly laid to glisten in the middle of his chest which that turtleneck is giving it all to protect.

Was this his way of saying he needed a break?

"Uh, Namjoon, to address the uh...elephant in the room," the interviewer begins, pulling the collar of the shirt aside, under pressure to both ask and be very polite about it. "Are you experimenting with new fashion these days?"

"No," he beams back, suspiciously innocent and wide-eyed. "These are my favourite clothes! They give me comfort and remind me of being loved whenever I go."

You think back and start piecing together, a patchwork of your own if you will, that these were all things you got him. Some you had forgotten - the joke beret, the necklace but the red turtleneck was an impromptu Christmas present while the green pants he wanted but didn't have the time to go out and buy himself.

"I see," the interviewer drawls. "To segway off what you said, as k-pop idols, love is certainly a big part of your songs, may I ask how you view love on your own? Is it something you share with your image or is it completely different?"

"Well, I-" Taehyung begins but is immediately interrupted by Namjoon whose eagerness makes him look like a complete maniac. Poor Taehyung can only blink owlishly and then let the matter be.

"Thank you so much for asking! I've thought a lot about love, I always made it complicated in my head, but now I know better. Love is being understood," his eyes snap straight into the camera and you flinch as you hold eye contact. "It's to be comfortable and feeling heard. Most of the time you know people say you have to be of similar interests, that then you'll be able to bond better but that is simply not true. People are not bonded together by their diplomas, how many stamps they have on their passport or how many painting meanings they can discern."

Your cheeks flush.

"They are bonded because they share one another and that's what's important not the trivial nonsense others may push upon them. The world is made of perspectives and whenever our loved ones express their thoughts it becomes a better, more interesting place. And I think we ourselves as well. What matters is not how many, let's say, artwork meanings they get but how much of us they get."

"And do you feel..."get"?" the interviewer asks awkwardly and Namjoon splits into a broad smile.

"Very much so. I need nothing of no one else."

YOONGI: He stands there menacingly. A (not so) tall shadow cast over your bed at the very break of the dawn.

"You slept well?" he asks. Menacingly. Cause that's what he was. Menacing. Even the package in his hands is...menacing. You scurry to press yourself against the headboard. There's a determined gleam in his eye, one that says he was up to something and will see the fruits of his labour even if it kills him.

"Umm it was okay. Why are you cosplaying as the boy from the Grudge?"

He whines and the sinister aura disappears. You had hoped to avoid him for some days. Despite your best intentions, the words that you were only charity to Yoongi repeated their heinous loop over and over in your head.

"It was meant to be cute," he pouts. "Like watching over you in a guardian sort of way."

"Ended up with Brahms," you mutter and then erupt in a fit of coughs, dryness in the throat making it hard to speak.

Yoongi's face sours in an instant.

"Did you fall mute again?"

You shrug. It's easy not to talk when you don't exist. He sighs but doesn't prod, knowing full well he can't force things to be alright.

"Would you be up for dinner? A fancy one?"

You incline your head to the package and he hands it over. Inside sits dinner wear made of the finest quality.

"Why?" you rasp. "You don't usually like dressing up."

He shrugs and something about it has your eyes narrowing.

"Just wanted to do something different," he replies a bit too offhand. "Are you up to it?"

"I-" another cough interrupts the sentence and Yoongi rushes to get a glass of water. "Thank you. Okay. We can go to dinner."

Another dinner, yey, you think to yourself dryly but he seems for some reason excited and it would be no good to be a curmudgeon to him as well.

"Thank you, Bacchus," he bids softly and leans to kiss the top of your head.

You snort at the nickname.

But the dinner extravaganza didn't simply end there. With every passing second, the mystery tightened like an Agatha Christie novel. Yoongi insisted on you taking the car he ordered, tinted windows to add, to an undisclosed restaurant and with the driver oathed to not speak a word of it. Your phone he asked to shut off as well. Not put it on mute but turn it off entirely. You partially wondered if he hit a psychotic break of sorts and/or has unfortunately turned into a murderer. Mulling over the heartbreak that would be if your honey boy would turn into a killer, you were stunned to see a familiar face when climbing out of the car. Your mother.

"Mom? What are you doing here?"

She was dressed to the nines as well and seemed rather shocked to see you climbing out of the car. Around her neck sat a pearl necklace one you don't recall her having and she was nervously twiddling with it in front of the restaurant's host. A restaurant that you very purposefully avoided as one of its managers was none other than that annoying, grating, stick-so-far-up-her-ass-its-practically-impaling-her cousin of yours.

"I don't know," she replied, glancing around. "Your boyfriend asked me to be here."

Before you could answer anything, the host urged you to enter into a private area as was the case when you dined with someone who needed absolute security at all times. The group wasn't all that large, consisting of yourself, your mother, your aunt, the aunt who wasn't as cool as the first one her weird husband and their dog even, who was sporting a fancy bowtie for the occasion. By the table sat Yoongi and though many would say he appeared stoic you knew exactly what that sly, scheming son of a biscuit had done this evening. He raised to stand, politely bid welcome to all your relations who as always didn't know how to act so they settled on an ungainly silence, and then gave you flowers before kissing your cheek. By the bar, her eyes glinting like two wildfires, sat your cousin gurgling her own poison most likely.

"I'm so going to choke you for this," you discreetly whisper into his ear but he only smiles.

With alcohol loosening much of the knotted tongues, the dinner progressed smoothly. Yoongi occasionally coquettishly leaned in, so unlike him, and brushed his nose against your cheek. All, of course, a part of an elaborate apology.

"But you were afraid of my mother," you argue, walking hand in hand back home. Where your cousin went you did not know but it was unlikely she would be present at the next meeting.

"Still am," he chuckles but even then there is an undercurrent of fright running deep. "But after you hung up I called her and she relayed that you looked like a ghost for the rest of the evening. And I know I said this a thousand times but I'm sorry, I'm sorry I'm not always there for you, I'm sorry for being absent, I'm sorry if anyone ever made you feel like you're invisible," he sighed, stretching he tie looser from his neck and you adjusted his hair, mussed by a strong gust of wind.

"Still you don't need to do all that," softly you say. "It's enough for you to just show up sometimes and be awkward in the corner."

"I know," he kisses the top of your head pushing the doors open. "Just wanted to show that you're the only one I see."

JIN: In a fashion that probably millions of other people did before him he pretended everything was fine. That it was all fine. What was it? Fine. Normal. Nothing was happening. Everything's usual. The same old. And then he cried in the bathroom stall for ten minutes, before forcing it to all stop and pretending that it was all fine.

But as your things became scarcer and two lives that he meant to unite forever were separated, clinically and detached like a scalpel of a surgeon, the less he could pretend it was fine.

It wasn't fine. It was over.

Jin was never one for relationship theatrics to say that his life was over as well but now he realized that it was - the life he wanted at least and possibly could have had in the future - was dust.

But there is some truth to the idea that sometimes loving someone was leaving them, letting them go in a wind, like a migrating bird, away from the winter of discontent and into the summer of ease.

And you assure him it's nothing he had done. Perhaps that's the most infuriating part, it's nothing he'd done so he can't correct, he can't change the world for you even if he wants to oh so bad. But harder still is to watch, watch you be a hollow shell, driven to a point of insecurity so high you ill. No jokes of his, no smiles, no well-meaning words of his can change the sentiment.

"I can't do this anymore. I can't handle the world you live in."

Even if he wouldn't be an idol, it's a world Jin has always lived in. He knows how to not buckle underneath the waves of judgment cause he had swum in them since but a bare-bottomed infant.

"You can always crash here or call me if you need help," he offers, trying to sound as light as possible while helping you pack the last boxes. Such a strange thing to help the love of your life leave you but despite all Jin has always wanted to take care. So he takes care one last time.

"That's not how it works," you laugh. It's dry and humourless and he wonders how long will it take for you to move on. The love is not lost it just couldn't conquer all as lovely as that would be.

"Yeah, I guess so," he scuffs his slipper against the floor. The home is empty now. It feels physically wrong and Jin hopes to himself this would all be a bad dream. That this is the same night he got you from the police station and this was a concoction of the mind, wormed and plagued by guilt.

"Eat well, okay," he reminds. There's so much he wants to say but he lets himself choke on those words. Why? He doesn't quite know but the last thing he wants to do is make you feel any worse. That's not what a good partner does. Even if he's soon to not be one.

"I will," you promise. "Remember to stretch once in a while, you play too many video games, they can make your muscles tense."

He doesn't trust his voice so Jin nods. And just like that, it's over. A thirty-second walk to the elevator is all he gets instead of a whole life he'd been so certain of. But even now he thinks that better you be happy than miserable by his side. The elevator dings and he's buying seconds, he would put his entire fortune for just a minute.

"Where will you be travelling exactly?" he asks.

"I don't know. Somewhere warm, somewhere cold. Find myself again," you reply, pretending it's all fine as well. If you acknowledge the reality for just a second, you'll break and so you delude yourself. For just a bit.

Jin nearly says to send him a lot of videos but then bites on his tongue. The elevator opens and you climb in, a suitcase behind you, a carton box in the crook of your arm. Jin smiles.

"You know, life is strange. Should we suddenly cross paths five years later who knows how it'll turn out, right?"

It's, of course, a hopeful delusion, a length of rope many have tied around their necks with a smile on their face but he can't stop. He doesn't want to stop. If the movie has a hopeful ending, it's a love story, if not - it's a tragedy and Jin was never one for tragedies.

Be that as it may, you open your mouth to say something, anything, but the elevator closes and the rest is silence.

HOSEOK: He glowers. Hoseok is not known for glowering but he does so to his earnest. The foot tapping the floor nearly makes a dent in the material as he waits. Waits for you like a disappointed parent or a hunter lying in an ambush. Hoseok himself doesn't particularly care what he is as long as he gets what he wants which is you at home.

She's not cheating, she would never cheat, he tells himself but isn't that what all poor bastards of the world thought. The hallway is dark and you stumble freely, assuming he's not here and then nearly crack your skull open when seeing him stand stoic like a statue in the dark.

"Fucking hell!" you yell and he jumps, somehow startling himself by the loudness of your voice.

"Welcome back," he greets you cooly, turning on the lights. "Hoped I was out?"

You stand squirming in guilt and avoiding his gaze exactly like a cheater would but there's no cologne on your blouse or a hickey on the neck. The only thing you carried was a plastic bag with snacks. Cheap, cheap snacks.

He takes it away from your hands and peers inside. Ramen, cotton buds, chocolate chips, and seaweed for some reason.

"I don't understand," he breathes out. "You're...all this time...every time you're not home you're doing grocery shopping?"

You don't answer anything and his brows furrow in confusion.

"_____________, I don't understand. Please, tell me what's wrong."

"Nothing wrong per se," you brush off. "It's just I..."

"I?" he urges.

"It's where I feel like I belong."

For a while, he leans into the wall and then it clicks together.

The store was perhaps the most normal thing possible with people going about their day, hardly any limelight. Hardly any luxury.

"You're with me, I love you," he sighs. "My world is your world."

"Yeah," you brush off, clearly lying. "I know."

And perhaps it's the stress or perhaps the fierceness with which he's ready to tie himself to you, a move he never thought he could wholeheartedly make, he has none of it. Which brings him back to a party, one in his name once more just a tad more covert.

"I don't know about this," you stammer, trying to pull your hand away from his.

"Just trust me. Don't you trust me?"

"Not with that tone," you whine crossing the street. "Listen, I'm happy your album is a success, couldn't be prouder -"

Hoseok's ears flush to this day when hearing any praise from your mouth.

"Thank you."

"- but you can, you know, have fun and I'll chill out somewhere else."

He whips around.

"Is it something someone said?" he confronts and you awkwardly glance away.

"They don't need to say it, it's apparent. I'm sticking out like a sore thumb in these places."

"I don't care for them and neither should you! If these parties are about me, then you should always be a part of them. I invite all the guys, all the time -"

"Yeah, you all work in the same field," you roll your eyes and he lightly flicks your forehead.

"Dummy, they're my family, you're my family and my family is with me in celebrations."

You gaze at your intertwined hands.

"Obviously, I can't and shouldn't force you to be here but trust me and maybe I can make you feel a little bit better."

You draw a heavy sigh, bemoaning to yourself about the sacrifices of love and with gritted teeth step into the enemy territory. It's loud and bright with many strangers surrounding you like flies around honey. You notice Jin and Jungkook tucked away neatly in the corner and they offer knowing nods of the head. You frown at them and turn to the stage where there's a podium and a magnificent chair like a throne behind it. Hoseok sits you, confused, down in it, sort of in the background but always present like an overarching symbolic presence and if people look then even faster they swerve away in guilt. Hoseok's smile is bright and polite but there is no question about it that the line "let's be friendly" means no one so much as opens their mouth to toss a curt comment or swerve their eye your way in an inappropriate manner. In between Hoseok frequently checking back and Jin pulling you into a nameless 1v1 phone game, you forget of the crowd, their judgement and your need for their opinion. Whenever you glance up, Hoseok is there giving an encouraging smile and you realize the one opinion that matters the most will never waver from always being in your favour.

JIMIN: The money spilt all across the counter as Mari yelped, startled when the door was simply kicked open.

"I-I'm sorry but we're clo-"

"What is this?" Jimin's voice comes with a sharpness you'd never ever heard before. It makes you swallow nervously, eyes lingering on the paper slip clutched in his palm.

"I...I explained what it is," you squirm anxiously and Mari's head is a blur, switching to left and fro in between you both.

"We..we have to keep closing," she whimpers, shrivelled small by the register squeaking in a barely audible tone.

Jimin's eyes snap towards her and she immediately withers underneath his rage.

"Just go home," you order her, tired, and she doesn't have to be told twice. Only a second passes before she's scurrying to the door. Momentarily, you can see that she recognizes the masked stranger but that makes her eyes only hang lower as she desperately tries to not be remembered, probably counting the sum of his displeasure in her head. When the bell rings to announce her exit, the air presses down with tension.

You twist the towel in your hands, pulling a deep breath to speak a string of words that cut your heart open.

"Jimin, I want...I want to break up."

"No."

A pause.

"No?" stunned, you echo.

"I'm not breaking up with you."

He has pulled the mask off his face and his eyes are crazy. They're rimmed red. He's been crying.

"You can't just -" you begin to object but he quickly interrupts.

"Do you still love me?"

The question takes you by surprise but he's not content with silence.

"Do you still love me?" he reiterates with more strength and you nod, voice catching in the throat.

"I do, but -"

"When we got together I said it would be hard but we promised, you promised that we would work through our problems together."

"I'm sorry," you murmur.

"Not accepted," Jimin snaps and you flinch. "What was this - "I'm sure in time you'll find yourself a more appropriate partner with whom you'll feel happier." With all due respect, ______________, you do not get to dictate what or to whom I should feel something. I'm dating you because I want you, not a model, not an idol or whoever you think is "good" for me. I want you."

"But what if I begin to resent you?" glaring at your shoes you listlessly argue but Jimin's face doesn't differ from the hard scowl with which he barged here into.

"I'm not going to part with the love of my life on a what if," he sneered throwing your breakup letter decidedly into the trash.

"But I'll just be a burden-!"

"Oh for the love of!" he throws his hands into the air. "You're not a burden for asking my help. I want to do it, you understand? Me! I want to help you, I want to provide for you, that's what I want not what you force me to do," completely worked himself into a heated tirade, he barely took a breath before pelting the words one after another like hail upon your shoulders.

"We're going to go home, talk about our problems and then live happily ever after, god fucking damnit!"

You stand mutely, hunched in yourself quite like a berated kid. Exhaling slowly through the nose, Jimin's rage seems to abate, if a little bit, and for a lingering pause, there's only the rhythmic ticking of the wall clock filling the air.

"I still need to close," you shuffle, sensing the familiar sting in the eyes.

"Fill out the documents," he replies stiffly but at least not sneering anymore. "I'll do the rest. You must be tired."

You comply without a question sitting down to fill out the proper numbers. Jimin's ensnared with dusting the countertops, mopping the floor, and gathering the trash. An unsightly, lowly work that a national star like him shouldn't be doing but he does. He does it all.

TAEHYUNG: He keeps thinking that it can't simply end like that - on a slammed door in the silence. But it does. It's inevitable like seeing your favourite movie with a sad ending over and over again, always hoping that the familiar reel will somehow change, that the world will be a better place than it is but the movie is set and the ending is set and everything is set in stone. Taehyung's role is set to play the irredeemable villain and be ruined by his own actions.

"This..you know...big city...but lovers find their way," he slurs in a bar with only Jimin to keep tabs on him. He's angry, untalkative and quite upset as Taehyung lost the love of his life and he lost a good friend all in one fell swoop. It's only because of Jimin's curt text of "way to miss your girlfriend's birthday, prick" that he came to his senses. He'd rushed home all at once though it did no good. The apartment was empty, the neighbours vouched for you moving out and in the trash, he found a single, crumpled note. It began and ended with only one word - V. Not Taehyung the one he's always been to you but V. There was nothing after it but he kept it still.

"Lovers...they find each other in every life right?" he asks but Jimin remains obstinately quiet yet when comes the time to weep he reaches out to pat his friend's back.

"It's just a scarf!" he yells into the stylist's face. "It's just a scarf! What's the big deal? It fits the theme, right? Just let me keep it!"

Namjoon having rushed to the room inspects this strange friend of his, backed into the corner with an expression so vicious he fails to recognize him. He doesn't know what happened but he knows the way Taehyung hugs the scarf to his chest, to protect, to cradle it like a kindling flame. He knows grief when he sees one.

"Just leave him alone," he orders the stylist and Taehyung is let on the stage with a scarf on his neck, one he doesn't stop touching throughout the entirety of the event. It was the only thing left besides the note, otherwise, you'd been very thorough, combing your life free of him in all conceivable ways. World as always goes on and Taehyung hates it for it doing so. Rather it'd stop, rather it stand completely still so he can mould himself into time itself and stop existing. He sees fractures of you in scenarios of happy strangers, of hands intertwined and smiles shared, a life lived together as he always wanted to. He intended to with such certainty it's like the very basis underneath his feet is crushed. He never assumed it'd go so wrong.

Largely he keeps this obsession to himself, of fear of being judged, of being called crazy, only Jimin knows and in his neverending love for his friend, he tolerates it. Partially in the happier moments, Taehyung tries to romanticize the situation. In any good love story, one person meets another and they are split apart by circumstance only to end up together. Forgiveness always wins and love prevails. That's what he was told since being a baby. This was...this was his term of punishment, a way to apologize for his actions but nothing of the sort is of course real. The reality which Taehyung was never too fond of was much more sterner and cutthroat. You didn't love him anymore = you left. The End.

The End.

He lives in dreams and he lives in love that now is just an echo.

But the wronger still comes the day when your scarf splits at the seams. It can't be fixed, it can't be brought back, it's just ruined and gone and it sits in Taehyung's hands - useless. Still, he shoves the threads in his pocket, fully aware that there was a line, a fine line to be drawn but he can't bring himself to draw it. If he stops hoping, just for a second, his movie will end like it was always meant to be.

JUNGKOOK: "Please come home."

"No."

The begging had been going on for almost half an hour. Both attempts were fruitless, his - to get you back, yours - to get him to leave.

"I'm sorry."

"You didn't accidentally step on my foot! You told me my entire life is useless. That I'm wrong for being not like you."

He licks his dry lips and runs a hand through the messed-up hair. Unwillingly, you notice that his knuckles were faintly bleeding. The temperature had dropped suddenly overnight. He must have forgotten to lotion them. Not that it mattered now. Though he had quite a lot to argue about that.

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry for what I said. I was stupid, petulant and..." he sighs, staring at the floor. "Jealous."

"Over what?" you tilt an eyebrow.

"Yoongi. You get along with Yoongi. He gets you and I was scared so I lashed out."

"It's not an excuse," listlessly, you frown at his figure lodged halfway into your friend's apartment. A safe haven, he somehow managed to find out about. One couldn't argue with how driven Jungkook was. A quality you did not appreciate much right now.

"What do you want here? That I'll spring back into your arms, magically find some sort of passion and suck you off in gratitude?!"

"No!" he objects. "No! It's not like that!"

"Then explain! Explain for us lowly, dispassionate losers what is this all about?!"

He begins to twiddle with his thumbs, tongue playing with the back of his lip ring. It wasn't often that a 1.79m, tattoed muscle mass known as Jeon Jungkook could possibly appear small but he appeared as such in this very moment.

"I just want you back. Want to eat my words," when you open your mouth to tear him a new one, he hurries faster. "But I know I can't. So I am asking, I'm begging to give me a chance. Not forgiveness, just a chance to start over. As...friends...if you'd like. I'll get to know you anew, open mind this time. Be as you are. That's all I'm asking."

"Friends?" you parrot, part scornful, part impressed. He used to drone on and on about how he always wanted to be more than friends, how that name was like a lightless void to him, an unshakeable role in the distance he was desperate to breach so to hear him offer that very role so eagerly was if anything a symbol of truly wanting to listen. If he could be trusted.

You assess him sternly, tucking away the feeling of a girlfriend far way.

"If we do it, if!" you emphasize yet his eyes gain a hopeful tint. Retribution. "I want to be able to cut ties without you throwing a fit, tracking me down and doing this because this," you wave over his crouched figure. "Is not cute. It's annoying. One strike and you're out! And we start as friends!"

He's not deterred in the slightest on the opposite his face is glowing.

"I'll get to know you as I should have," he promises. "No judgement."

You let out a prolonged, irritated sigh.

"I hate you."

"I don't," he replies, nose scrunched in happiness. "Not in the slightest."

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ennioscorner · 8 months

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Monday, 28 August 2023

Day 001/365

Hey, Ennio here. I'm using these "self discovery" journal prompts to see if I can stay focused for a whole year and finish something. Hopefully, I can. Stay for the ride. I'll just be venting and answering the prompts. Anonymity is a plus, no? "What are you admired and complimented for the most?"

"What am I admired for and complimented most for?" I have no clue. I would say that it would be my sense of "security". Is that what it's called? I suppose I put up a face that shows that I really don't care to make it seem that nothing gets to me. It's tiring honestly. I feel that everyone sees through my façade and is hoping that I crack. I feel the stares at every moment. At home, in public, at work. Hell, when I was at work because now I'm unemployed. I was so happy when I was told that we would be moving away. I could FINALLY quit that dead-end job I was at. Every day was killing me inside. The inane questions from the general public. A wage that in modern America doesn't let you sleep well at night. The staff who just seemed so incompetent. I was miserable but... happy in a way. I envied my co-workers though. They seemed to have it all together and none of it at the same time. I wanted to have what they had. They knew who they were. But, who was I? The dude who couldn't hold a conversation? The dude who had anger issues? The dude who tried to start every day with a smile and try to be better with people? None of it mattered. I was off-putting, I guess. I was a hard worker? Somewhat. I did what my responsibilities called for. Abrasive? Very much so. I took pills. They didn't help. They caused me to have migraines even more than before. I was having dizzy spells every so often. I tried to change for the better. What was wrong with me? I hate myself. I don't know why I am the way I am. I just want a do-over. I want to be happy. I long for a reset. Why? Why can't I do anything? Why can't I speak out? Even in my dreams, or nightmares, I try to scream. But I can't. It's drowned out in my own fear. I feel like I'm drowning. I slip further and further each day. I had potential. I had promise. I heard it all. Now, I'm a failure. I know I disappoint my family. I was an orphan. Raised by my paternal grandmother. I know she resents me deep down. I see it in every choice that I make. Maybe it's my fault. I was abandoned and she had to take care of me. I resent myself. I loathe every day that I wake up. The same thoughts come back to me. "You know that you don't belong." I long to disappear. I lost my way so long ago that I don't remember what aspirations I had for the future. Part of me has faith. But the other parts stifle it. They hold it down. The days grow darker. They grow more cold. It hurts to breathe. I feel myself dragged down further and further. My own nostalgia blinds me. Were things better before? Well, I guess I strayed off topic enough. I should probably stop it here. Too much self loathing. hahahaha. Till tomorrow. Who knows? Maybe I'll get a call for an interview. Fingers crossed.

Till next time,

Ennio R.

#journal #diary #self discovery #sorry for being depressing #mentally tired #who am i

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ganbaruwayo · 1 year

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幻想ノスタルジア・Fantasy Nostalgia

Toripiyo ft. Hatsune Miku Translation by Platonic水を食べる / Free to use with credit and a link back to this post.

言い訳は　いらないわ There's no need for an explanation, うつむき　夜空に　天の川 looking downwards on me in the night sky is the Milky Way 思い出せない　いつの日か I just can't remember, but one of these days 遠い日の事　夢みてた I dreamed of something that happened on a far away day

いいかげんな　貴方だから I've had enough of this, but since it's you うなずき　青空　蝉時雨 I nod my head. Cicadas burst out and sing in the blue sky; 手を振った　あの日から From that day that I waved my hand, 桜は何度　咲いただろう I wonder, how many times have the cherry blossoms bloomed?

きっと大人に　なれないから Since I surely can't become an adult, 君ともう　空は見れないから and I can't yet see you nor the sky きっと大人　になれないのを Surely the only one uncomfortable with 嫌がっているのは　私だけ being unable to become an adult is just me

歌を歌っても　届かないよ I can't even make myself sing a song, 無理を言っても　聞こえないよ nor can I hear out the asking for unreasonable things なら何ができて　なにが残るの？ Then, what can I do, what's left for me? 教えてよ、ねぇ！ Tell me, please!

君と　月の下で　暇乞い With you, under the moon, we say our good-byes 最後に指を　切り合って and in the end, our fingers fight for a pinky-promise* 遠い日見てた　夢の跡に That far away day I saw in the traces of that long-gone dream** 約束交わして　またいつか Us exchanging promises…oh, maybe again someday

さよならなんて　言えなくて I can't say something sad like "farewell",*** 何も言わずに　見つめあって so I stare at you without saying anything at all 星空の見た　夢の跡と Looking at the starry sky, to the closing door of the 閉まる　扉に　手を振るよ traces of that long-gone dream, I wave my hand.

いいわ、だって　貴方なんか It's fine, after all, you're, well… 嘘つき　夕暮れ　トンボの羽 A liar, the twilight, and the wings of the dragonflies, 目をつむった　あの日から I shut my eyes to them and ignore it all, but**** 忘れてしまいたかったけれど I really wish that I could have forgotten that day

きっと大人に　なりたいから Since I surely want to become an adult, 君のもう　傍にいれないから and I can't yet be by your side きっと大人に　なりたいのを Surely the only one uncomfortable with 嫌がっているのは　私だけ wanting to become an adult is just me

黙っていてよ　届かないの Shut up! I can't reach them… 嘘を言ってよ　聞こえないの Go on and tell a lie, I can't hear them 涙が出るの　声も出ないの Tears begin to leave my eyes but my voice won't leave my mouth,***** 苦しいよ、ねぇ This hurts, please…

君と　空の下の　蝉時雨 With you, under the sky, where the outburst of cicadas 歌う　ブリキの　オルゴール Sing, like the tin music box 遠い日見てた　夢の跡に That far away day I saw in the traces of that long-gone dream 約束残して　またいつか Leaving undone those promises…oh, maybe again someday

夜空に　唄う　天の川 In the night sky, singing a song to the Milky Way, ラジオの　詠んだ　星模様 the radio reciting the patterns of the stars like a poem 星空の見た　夢の跡に That starry sky I saw in the traces of that long-gone dream 君の事を　思い出すよ I remember a memory of you

ふたりで　描いたあの夢の　話を That dream story we painted together, 涙を　流す度に　忘れていくの Every time I shed tears, I forget about it きっと　貴方も　覚えていないけど Even though you surely don't remember it either… でも、忘れないよ　覚えてるよ But, I won't forget it, I'll remember this もう泣かないよ　だからきっと And I won't cry anymore, so, surely, この胸に　あったはずの　貴方の　名前は In this chest it should be: your name is

きっと　セピア色の　原風景 Surely, that unforgettable sepia-coloured childhood memory ラジオの唄う　ノスタルジー The radio singing, oh the nostalgia 貴方がくれた　夢の跡は The traces of that dream, that you gave to me, たからものの　絵空事 is a dearly treasured pipe dream.

空の下の　蝉時雨 Under the sky, where the outburst of cicadas つぐむ　ブリキの　オルゴール are silent, like the tin music box 遠い日　見てた　夢の跡に That far away day I saw in the traces of that long-gone dream 約束　残して　またいつか Leaving undone those promises…oh, maybe again someday

さよならなんて　言わないよ I won't say something sad like "farewell" 黙す　ジオも　いらないよ I don't need this shut-up radio either 星空に溶けた　夢の跡に Melted into the starry sky, in the traces of that long-gone dream 君のことを　思い出すよ I remember: a memory of you.

ゆびきった！ Pinky-promised!

Translation Notes *The phrase here 指を切り合って(yubi wo kiriatte) is a pun on 指切り (yubiriki / pinky promise). Kiriau means to cross swords, so it gives the image that they're struggling to make a promise. **夢の跡 is a phrase literally meaning "traces of a dream", but figuritavely it means a place where dreams have disappeared, and is meant to highlight the futility of reality, hence the "long-gone" part. ***Just to make sure because it's surprising how many people don't know this, 'sayonara' is like a "i'm never going to see you again" type of goodbye, so I added the "sad" part to make sure that nuance is conveyed in English. ****目を瞑る means both to shut one's eyes and to ignore/pretend not to know. *****涙が出るの声も出ないの -- the verb in both of these phrases used is the same ("tears leave, voice doesn't leave" literally) so even though it would sound more natural as "i begin to cry" I decided to translate it this way to keep the juxtaposition.

#gensou nostalgia #fantasy nostalgia #toripiyo #hatsune miku #translations #vocaloid translation #vocaloid #translating this fucked me up tbh

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yuujispinkhair · 2 years

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Meet the family

After being very reluctant about it, Megumi finally introduces you to his family, and you spend a chaotic but fun evening with them.

Pairing: Megumi x Reader (female) Genre: Fluff, my attempt at humor Word Count: 4 k Warnings: Some suggestive stuff. All characters are aged up. My blog is 18+, so minors don't interact.

Thank you to @adelheidvonschicksal for the request!

It all starts with an innocent question.

"Can I meet your family too, babe?"

Megumi looks up from the book he's reading, perched on the couch next to you, both huddled under a warm blanket. Your head is resting on his shoulder, fingers tracing invisible patterns on his thigh. It was such a comfortable evening until now. His heartbeat accelerates, but he tries to keep his aloof demeanor.

"Maybe one day. They're all pretty busy."

He knows something is wrong when you pull away from him. An ugly feeling of dread pools in his stomach. Shit, what did he do? Are you upset? His dark blue eyes look at you worriedly.

"Baby? Are you ok?"

You manage a weak smile, but he can see that it's not a genuine one. It looks much too sad for that.

"I just... are you ashamed of me, Megumi? Or am I not important enough to introduce to your family?"

The dread spreads through his body, and now it has an iron grip on his heart.

"No, of course not! You are the most important thing in my life!"

"When why? Anytime I ask about meeting your family, you come up with another excuse."

Megumi's heart clenches painfully. This is the last thing he wanted. He promised himself to always take good care of you and make you feel loved and reassured. Give you all the things he lacked in his own life. And now he failed so completely. He sees the hurt in your eyes, sees the tears that are threatening to spill over. And he is the one who put them there.

He closes his book and lets it drop onto his lap so he can reach out and pull you into his arms. His arms wrap tightly around you, maybe too tight, but he doesn't care at the moment. He just needs to make sure you are pressed to his chest, safe in his embrace. He is bad at words, so this is the best thing he can do, hold you so tightly that you hopefully feel how much he cares about you.

Or maybe there's something else he can do. Something he has to do, even though he wanted to avoid it.

"Do you have time this Friday? I'd like to introduce you to my family.

When Megumi approaches Gojo about it, he is met by a smug grin and a clap on the back before Gojo ruffles his hair in that annoying manner of his.

"Aww, look at that! Megumi-chan is gonna bring his girlfriend home to meet the family! That's so cute!"

"Shut up. I'm just doing this for her because she thought I'm hiding her away. So promise me you won't make a fuss about this. She's too important to me for that!"

It costs him all his remaining dignity to share this with Gojo. But you're worth it. Megumi would do anything for you, anything to make you happy. And if it makes you feel loved that he wants you to meet his family, he will do it.

Gojo laughs that infuriating, loud and mocking laugh of his.

"You're so nervous! That's endearing as fuck!"

But at least he lets go of Megumi and instead leans against his desk with his arms crossed in front of his chest, gaze fixed thoughtfully on a point above Megumi's face.

"Hmmm, we have to make this special. It's not every day that my little boy brings someone home. But don't worry, I got this! I'll take care of everything."

"That's exactly what worries me! And stop calling me little boy. We will just have a normal dinner at a restaurant. Nothing too fancy. Don't pull the "I am rich, and I will spoil you" card!"

"Awww, but where's the fun in that, Megumi-chan? Nah, I'm just teasing you. I'll order a table at that steakhouse you and Yuuji love so much. She likes that kind of food, right?"

Deep down, Megumi can't help but feel a tiny bit touched that Gojo is so supportive and actually remembers which place Megumi likes and is sensitive enough to inquire about your eating habits first.

He gives Gojo a curt nod,

"The steakhouse is a good idea. But I'll book the table myself."

"Of course you will. Always taking care of everything, huh? You're a good boyfriend."

There's something that looks almost like pride in Gojo's gaze when he lifts his blindfold to look at Megumi.

Today is the big day. The day Megumi has been dreading. Today he's going to officially introduce you to his family. Well, his found family. He can't really bring you to the hospital to meet his sister, right? Or ask you to go on a scavenger hunt to find his missing father. On the other hand, the other option, letting you meet Gojo, Itadori, and Kugisaki isn't much better.

He told them several times to refrain from embarrassing him in front of you. But he's not even sure that it registered in their chaotic brains. Itadori and Kugisaki were too busy squealing loudly and taking turns hugging him and doing some stupid dance around him while chanting, "Fushiguro's got a girlfriend!! Fushiguro's got a girlfriend!!"

And Gojo always only does what he wants anyway, so this is a fight Megumi isn't going to win.

He can only hope for the best. But unfortunately, this isn't very reassuring, and once he picks you up and the two of you are on your way downtown, he can't help but feel more nervous with every step he comes closer to the steakhouse.

The only thing that makes him keep on walking instead of running the other way is your warm hand in his and the way you lean against him, the extra swing in your step because you are so happy that he's taking you to see his family for the first time.

"So, just one more time, so I don't make any mistakes: Gojo is like your adoptive dad. And Itadori and Kugisaki are your best friends, like a brother and a sister for you. And Nanami is... something like Itadori's adoptive dad?" "Yeah, that's how you can put it."

He even manages not to cringe at hearing Gojo getting called his adoptive dad. To his surprise, Itadori informed him this morning that Nanami had said he would be there too. Megumi hadn't taken him for someone who would join in on this madness. But he assumes that Itadori had used his puppy dog eyes on him and pouted until the man hadn't been able to say no.

The two of you have reached the restaurant by now, and Megumi stops abruptly and pulls you against him, earning a surprised yelp from you as you stumble against him.

His arms encircle your waist, and he presses his lips onto yours in a fierce kiss, warm lips moving against yours firmly before prying your mouth open with his tongue. He sighs into your mouth when you open up for him and let your tongue meet his in a sweet caress.

This is where he feels safe. When he can show you how much you mean to him with his kisses and his touches. He can't even bring himself to care that you are standing on a busy street. This is a special case! Fuck anyone who stares at the two of you!

He makes sure to kiss you extra deeply, forcing himself to go slow so he can savor it. A deep, tender kiss that lets you know how much he needs you. He hopes it is enough.

When he pulls away again, he looks at you intently, one hand cupping your cheek and caressing it gently.

"I love you, babe."

He has to make sure you know how he feels about you, has to make you understand that no matter what's gonna happen in there, Megumi loves you and wants you in his life, forever, please.

You blink at him, a bit confused by the sudden urgency, but smile at him with that sweet smile that makes his heart almost burst. You peck his lips again, a quick soft kiss, before taking a step back.

"I love you too, Gumi. Shall we go inside? I think they are already waiting for us."

Megumi nods and takes your hand again, trying his best to look collected and in control. It's just a dinner, dammit!

His heart is beating up to his throat. He has a bad feeling about this. A very bad feeling. His last mission wasn't as scary as this is. If only he had a normal family!

Megumi takes a deep breath and opens the door with a nervous little half-smile, holding it open for you before following you inside. His breath gets stuck in his throat when his gaze lands on the scene in front of him. His found family is sitting at a table, all dressed as if they are going to prom or a wedding or some other really formal event. Gojo and Itadori are each wearing a suit and even a fucking tie! Itadori is still fumbling around with his, trying to adjust the knot correctly. And Kugisaki is in a party dress. It sparkles. Megumi wants to turn around and hide in his room and never come out again. They have seen the two of you by now, though, and loud hellos erupt from all three of them. Gojo and Itadori are both waving like some three-year-olds. Megumi feels your hand squeezing his as you turn to look at him with a worried expression on your face. "I didn't know this was a formal event, Gumi. Why didn't you tell me? I feel so underdressed." "Because it isn't! I have no idea what they are doing!" He strokes his thumb over the back of your hand soothingly. The last thing he wants is for you to feel nervous or inadequate.

"It's ok, babe, you look perfect. They are the problem, not you." The two of you have arrived at the table now, and Megumi sends a death glare towards his friends and Gojo. Dinner hasn't even started, and they have already managed to make you feel uncomfortable. This evening is going to be a disaster! It takes all his self-control to stay calm and introduce you to the crazy bunch and vice versa. After the chaos of greeting each other with lots of bows and waves and handshakes has died down, he pulls out the chair next to Kugisaki so you can sit down, his blue eyes boring into Kugisaki's, a silent warning to behave. To his enormous relief, she smiles brightly at you,

"Oh my god, (name)! I adore your shirt! Where did you get it?"

Megumi lets out a breath. He was worried that Kugisaki would say something rude or act weird. But this is good! He sits down next to you, which puts him next to Gojo, who sits at the head of the table. So far, he hasn't done anything too outrageous. But Megumi knows that things can go to shit pretty fast.

And as if hearing his thoughts, Gojo clears his throat and sits up straight. His face is suddenly void of any emotion, and Megumi senses that he's about to do something weird. He watches with dread as Gojo pulls down his sunglasses far enough to peek over them, light blue eyes fixing you like a predator fixes his prey.

"So, (name), I have to ask this: what are your intentions with my dear Megumi-chan?"

You gape at him with your mouth hanging open, eyes widening. Megumi wants the ground to open up and swallow him whole. Maybe now would be a good moment to tell Sukuna that he wants to visit him in his Malevolent Shrine. Maybe he could stay there forever? Anything to escape this madness.

But no, Megumi would never leave you to deal with this on your own. His protectiveness is already triggered to the max.

"Gojo, I swear if you don't stop!"

But Gojo chooses that moment to slap his own knees with his hands and laugh like a maniac.

"Your faces!! Gosh, I wanted to do this for a long time!!"

He looks at you with a cheeky grin,

"Sorry, it was too tempting! But I'm sure your intentions are perfectly fine. I don't have any complaints!"

Itadori has gotten the joke now, too, and is laughing and banging his fist on the table, misjudging his strength and sending the plates jumping up and down with a loud clatter.

Kugisaki adds dryly:

"Honestly, I hope you have some bad intentions because Fushiguro really needs to loosen up a bit. Resolving that sexual frustration will help hopefully."

Megumi's angry reply gets interrupted by a familiar gentle voice,

"My apologies for being late. I had to work overtime, unfortunately."

Nanami! So he really came.

Itadori is patting the chair next to him excitedly,

"Aww, Nanamin!! Come sit beside me!!"

Does he have to act like a three-year-old? An adorable three-year-old, but still. But at least a responsible adult is here now. Megumi looks at the blond sorcerer gratefully. Nanami smiles politely at you and introduces himself, followed by courteous small talk. Megumi relaxes for the first time since he arrived in this restaurant. But he can't help but steal worried glances at you. Do you feel comfortable? Or is this too much? As if you are sensing his nervousness, you turn your head and smile at him. Sweet and affectionate. Your smile is one of the few things that always can calm him down. He feels the corner of his lips lift in a soft half-smile. Your hand lands on his thigh, rubbing it reassuringly. Megumi places his hand on top of yours, interlacing your fingers and caressing his thumb gently over the back of your hand.

He's grateful for those little gestures. Anytime he feels insecure, he craves your touch, feels an almost unbearable urge to hold you, to put his hands and lips all over you, making sure that you are here with him. That you are his. That you won't leave. So this helps him a lot, the intimacy of your touch, holding hands under the table while the chaos erupts around him.

Because the peace doesn't last long. Not even Nanami can save this evening.

To Megumi's utter horror, Gojo slams down a photo album onto the table. With a cat-like smile, he opens it, revealing a page with pictures of seven-year-old Megumi. He's holding a dog plushy in one hand. The other hand is showing the camera his middle finger. Wow. Great, just lovely. Gojo is having the time of his life, laughing loudly, attracting the attention of the other guests as he shoves the photo album toward you.

"Look! Wasn't little Megumi cute?? He was such a ray of sunshine, always threatening me and glaring at the camera. He was a handful, but I think he grew into a wonderful young man!"

He sighs dramatically while touching a hand to his chest, right above his heart. Megumi's fingers twitch with the urge to punch him and show him that he's still a handful. But what is that? Gojo's sunglasses slip down his nose for a moment, and his eyes look suspiciously shiny.

Next to Megumi, you are flipping through the photo album while Itadori is leaning across the table, and both of you are swooning over the pictures of Megumi's childhood. Itadori's joyous laughter carries through the whole restaurant. He's pointing at an idyllic picture of little Megumi sitting in a meadow surrounded by white baby rabbits, and someone (Gojo) had put a bunny-ear headband on Megumi's head. He remembers this all too well. It was right after he accidentally activated Rabbit Escape for the first time because Gojo had been pestering him about taking pictures. "Look at that! Fushiguro was such a cute kid!! But I mean, he's still very cute! And smart and reliable and really nice, you made a good catch!"

Itadori is really hyping him up. Megumi can't stop a small thankful smile from ghosting over his features. He looks to you and what he sees makes a warm feeling spread through his chest. You look at the picture with a dreamy expression on your face, your index finger carefully tracing the bunny ears. But then you seem to feel Megumi's gaze on you because you lift your head and smile at him. You're still looking at him with that loving expression on your pretty face while you answer Itadori:

"That's true. I got very lucky!"

Megumi's heart thumps wildly in his chest. He isn't used to receiving compliments like this. It's something that only started happening since Itadori came into his life and then you. He still doesn't know how to handle the praise, and so he just smiles softly and hopes he is succeeding in fighting the blush that's threatening to spread over his pale cheeks.

He's almost grateful for Kugisaki's loud interjection:

"Yeah, he's grumpy but secretly a sweet guy. You could have done worse. Real pretty eyelashes too! Kinda nerdy, though, but I guess the quiet ones are always the kinky ones, they say, so I hope you have fun with him when the two of you are alone."

"I can hear every word you say. You know that, right?"

"But Fushiguro! We're just complimenting you! Making sure your girlfriend knows that she won the jackpot."

Itadori looks at him with those warm honey-colored puppy dog eyes and that stupid sunshine smile. Megumi simply cannot argue with him. It's impossible. It would feel like stepping on a dog's paw.

And so he stays silent and just keeps holding hands with you under the table, only letting go when your food arrives. Everyone is busy stuffing their mouth full of the delicious meal, so luckily, the conversation pretty much dies down. Until Itadori demands dessert, and Gojo's face lights up.

"Oh, I almost forgot! I have something for you!"

Megumi flinches. This can't be good. He watches Gojo leaning down, apparently grabbing something from under his chair. When he straightens up again, he's holding a heart-shaped box of chocolate and a pink greeting card.

"What the..."

"Utahime was so nice to send you this!"

He opens the card and reads it out loud:

"Dear Megumi, dear (name), congratulations on your first evening with the family. That's a special moment in every relationship, and I hope everything goes to your liking. Hopefully, the white-haired idiot won't ruin it! Yes, I know you are reading this, Satoru! Be nice to them!"

Gojo erupts into another fit of laughter,

"She's so feisty! Me ruining the evening?"

He shoves the box of chocolate in your direction. Megumi is staring at it dumbfounded. What is happening here?

"How? Why?... Why did Utahime send a card and chocolate? How does she even know about this?"

"Oh Megumi, I might have mentioned it once or twice while talking to her."

"You mean you blackmailed her into sending this?"

"Hahaha, why would I even do that? What are you thinking?"

Megumi thinks Gojo has completely lost it. But you are giggling beside him and currently opening the box of chocolate and offering them to Itadori and Kugusaki. Honestly, you sound so amused, so he forces himself to keep his mouth shut and stop complaining.

He cannot relax though, too much is happening. Itadori and Kugisaki are always chatty, but today it's even worse. They are hogging you, each of them fighting for your attention. Kugisaki is telling you about all her favorite stores and make-up brands, already planning a shopping spree with you. And Itadori is scribbling a list of potential karaoke duets he can sing with you onto a napkin. They are so loud and exhausting!

This time it's Megumi who reaches out first and puts a hand onto your knee, caressing it soothingly, letting you know he's here for you. To his surprise, you don't seem to be annoyed by his friends. But maybe you are just too nice to show it. Megumi decides to intervene: "Hey, give her a break."

That makes both of them glare at him and complain hotly, but Megumi ignores them because all that matters is that you are leaning closer and kiss his cheek and whisper in his ear: "It's ok, don't worry. They are nice. And you will have me all to yourself for the rest of the night."

The promise those words contain and the softness of your lips brushing over his earlobe makes his breath quicken. One more reason why he wants this dinner to be over quickly. Because he would absolutely prefer to be tangled up in bed with you right now.

Unfortunately, Gojo watches the two of you closely, and his smirk is far too smug when he says:

"Aww, young love! Isn't it cute when you are so crazy for each other all the time!"

This time Megumi kicks him under the table, cheering inwardly when he realizes Gojo turned off his infinity, and Megumi's shoe connects successfully with Gojo's shin.

An hour later, Megumi feels another level of tension creeping up on him as the restaurant door closes behind him, and it's only him and you again.

The street is busy, flocks of people chatting in groups, or some couples whispering sweet things to each other, some alone with their headphones on, lost in the lyrics of their favorite songs. The neon lights of all the shops and bars light up the night in bright colors. It's chilly now, the cold night air making his breath come out in little puffs. This is Megumi's favorite time to be in the city. It usually manages to calm him down when it's nighttime here, but tonight he can't find any rest. Not when he's so worried about what you think about the meeting with his family. It was a disaster, wasn't it?

Megumi turns to you with a pained expression.

"I'm really sorry, baby. That's why I was so reluctant about you meeting them."

He is sure you're upset. The whole evening was total chaos. His family was weird and embarrassing, and now you probably see Megumi in a totally different light, and you will question your feelings for him and ask yourself whether this relationship is the right thing for you.

He's mentally steeling himself for the moment he'll see the disappointment in your eyes, the moment he will know for sure that he fucked up. Regret is weighing heavily on him. He should have never agreed to this meeting! He doesn't want things to change between the two of you! He can't lose you! You mean the world to him!

His blue-eyed gaze finally meets yours, and he blinks. What he sees in your eyes isn't what he expected. There is no anger or irritation. Instead, your eyes sparkle with joy and amusement, and they are so warm, so full of love. But how? The evening was horrible!

"Gumi, please don't look like you broke your favorite coffee mug. The evening was great!"

"What? But..."

He clears his throat, trying to compose himself again before he makes a complete fool of himself.

"You enjoyed the evening? Really?"

You nod and smile brightly at him while you reach out to take his hand in both of yours. "Yes, I did! Your family is so nice and funny!"

"Nice...and funny."

"Yes...why? Don't you think so?"

And suddenly, Megumi's worry about you being irritated by his family gets replaced by a feeling of guilt. You LIKE them.

And really, why shouldn't you? They are good people, all of them! Maybe they have a different opinion about how the first meeting with his special someone should go, but they put their whole heart into this evening. The formal attire, the food, the stories, the pictures.

It was embarrasing for Megumi. But knowing those three, they really had no bad intentions at all. They were so excited, so happy for him, and wanted to make this evening special and sweet.

For fuck's sake, Gojo had tears in his eyes! He had acted like a true dad tonight. So proud and supportive. So genuinely happy for Megumi that he had found someone who wanted to be by his side and loved him for himself without knowing about his powers or his family connections and money.

And Itadori and Kugisaki? Yes, they hadn't let you breathe, being all over you and simply being too much. But wasn't it heartwarming how eager they had been to get to know you and to include you?

Nanami joining you even in his free time! And that card and the chocolate from Utahime? It was cheesy and stupid, and no sane person did this! But...but they meant well.

Megumi suddenly thinks of the way Itadori flung an arm around him this morning and ruffled his hair, and told him with that big stupid grin that he was so excited to finally meet you! "We'll make sure to make her feel welcome, Fushiguro!"

And now Megumi finally sees clearly, and his frown gives way to a soft, thoughtful expression as a genuinely happy smile finds its way onto his lips.

"No, you're right. My family is very nice. I'm glad you finally got to know them, baby."

His heart feels so full all of a sudden. You're standing here in front of him, holding his hand and looking at him with so much affection. And in there, his found family is probably currently screaming about how amazing you are and how happy they are for Megumi.

He is surrounded by love, isn't he? There are people who care for him, people who are there for him. They won't leave. They won't change their mind about him.

His vision is becoming a bit blurry, and he quickly blinks a few times before his emotions get the best of him. He has other plans for the rest of the night, though. Other ways to show you how pleased he is.

He cups your chin and tilts up your face, leaning so close that he can let his lips brush over the corner of your lips, trail over your cheek, and finally place a gentle kiss right under your ear.

"Let's go home. It was still a stressful evening. You made me so happy, and I think you deserve a reward for enduring all of this craziness. Let me make it up to you, bunny."

He can hear your soft groan upon hearing the pet name, and it makes him smile against your skin. He pulls away, intertwining your hands and gently tugging you against his side. You fall in step beside him, leaning against him.

"It was the perfect evening. You don't have to make up for anything, baby."

"Then I'll make it even more perfect."

"I know you will. You always do. Nobara wasn't wrong about that thing she said about quiet guys."

Your laughter makes some people turn their heads toward you, but Megumi really doesn't mind. He finds himself laughing softly too, and tugging on your hand a bit more because he really wants to be alone with you to show you just how right Kugisaki was.

Thank you so much for reading! I hope you enjoyed this little, cheesy crack!fic. I had a lot of fun writing it. I think Megumi is really lucky that he has such a sweet family. It would be super nice if you comment and reblog!

@adelheidvonschicksal I hope this turned out the way you had in mind! Thank you again for the request! It was such a cute idea!

#megumi x reader #fushiguro x reader #fushiguro megumi x reader #megumi fluff #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #fushiguro fluff #fushiguro megumi fluff #jujutsu kaisen headcanons #jjk headcanons #megumi fushiguro x reader #fushiguro megumi

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ongaku-ato-kakikomi · 2 years

Note

I have. Sad imagine. Imagine that the reader is bi and hodgins makes comments to her about how it's hot and stuff about threesomes until she finally breaks

Warning: Biphobic comments.

"Hey, (Y/N)!" Hodgins screams out to you when you walk past his station, a large grin on his lips as he waves at you. "Heard you had a lovely date with a woman last night."

You stop in your tracks, an annoyed look on your face as soon as you register his words. You should have known Booth would have slipped it out as soon as you told him how you spent your night; though, you would have preferred if he had kept his mouth shut for once.

You give out a sigh as you turn your head towards Hodgin, already expecting to hear something worse in the next few minutes. "Yes, I did."

Jack crosses his arms over his desk, a curious glint in his eyes. "How did it go?"

You quirk an eyebrow at him, unsure as to why he would ask you that. "It went really well."

"So you got lucky, huh?" Your expression falters as soon as he says those words, the scientist not noticing your annoyance as he continues to speak. "Two women together is so hot."

You bite the inside of your left cheek, your eyes squinting at him. "Huh huh."

"I bet it would have been hotter if she had a boyfriend." He chuckles, completely unaware of your frustration growing inside your chest. "You must do threesomes a lot, right? Like you must met a lot of couples who are looking for a fun night."

"Right." You click your tongue, now fully glaring at the man. "Because that's what all of use bisexuals do... have treesomes all the time because we can't pick a gender."

He seems to notice the harshness in your tone, a worried look taking over his eyes. "Are you okay, (Y/N)?"

"No, I'm fucking not okay, Jack." His eyes widen at your choice of words, your teeth grinding as you spit out a set of words. "I'm tired of your nasty comments, okay? Ever since I told you about my sexuality, you've only treated me like some kind of sex freak. You're being irrespectful towards me, your friend and colleague, and frankly, you've been quite biphobic as well. So if you could keep your thoughts and fantasies to yourself, I'd really appreciate it."

He stares at you with wide-opened eyes, realization hitting him faster than a train on tracks. "... noted."

"Great." You turn away from him, ready to walk towards your own station with a frustrated look on your face. "Now if you'll excuse me-"

"Hey, now, wait a second." You give out another sigh as soon as you hear his voice, turning your head towards him once more to see an apologetic look on his face. "I'm... I'm sorry. You're right. I've been super disrespectful and all. I shouldn't have made any of those comments... I promise I'll do better from now on."

"... oh." You blink a few times, having not quite expected that kind of response. "Well... thanks. I appreciate it."

"I consider you a good friend, (Y/N)." He nervously scratches his temple, a look of pure guilt and embarrassment on his face. "I feel bad for making you go through that... so... if I ever do make you feel uncomfortable again, please tell me, okay?"

"... will do." You gently tap your fingers against the file in your arms, a small smile coming to your lips. "See ya later, Jack."

He gives out a small smile, sending you a wave on your way out. Your lips stretch onto your cheeks with each step you take, a sense of relief and joy washing over you after that conversation. It almost makes you regret not saying anything sooner... but oh well. You're just glad your friend is grown enough to be willing to change for the better.

#bones #jack hodgins #jack hodgins imagine #jack hodgins imagines #jack hodgins x reader #bones imagine #bones imagines #bones x reader #imagine #imagines #x reader #reader insert #request #requests

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minty-malfoy · 3 years

Text

“would you still love me if I turned into a worm?” | blurbs

🌱 pairings: reader x blaise zabini, cedric diggory, draco malfoy, fred weasley, george weasley, harry potter, hermione granger, luna lovegood, neville longbottom (sorted in alphabetical order)

🌱 warning tags: language, probably

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Blaise Zabini

“A what, now?” your boyfriend asks, halting the movements of his quill to look up at you; brows furrowed as if it’s the most absurd thing he has ever heard in his entire life.

“You know, those wiggly things that—”

“I know what worms are, (y/n). But what the hell?”

“Dunno,” you shrug. “I’m bored.”

“So you thought about what it’d be like to turn into a worm?” his eyes narrow out of pure bewilderment, blinking once, twice, as he finally turns back to his unfinished essay. “Sometimes I wonder what goes on in that head of yours.”

“Not my fault you’re taking so long with that assignment,” you grumble as you begin to shift on the puffy couch, feeling somewhat annoyed by how cold and empty it is without the other boy in it. “And besides, you love me.”

An amused chuckle escapes his lips. “Can’t say that I don’t.”

“Even as a worm?”

“Will you stop asking if I said yes?”

You nod happily, giving him the answer he needs— or well, wants, really. Even though Blaise couldn’t quite understand the pointless question, he knows it’s significant to an extent.

“Yeah, alright. I would. Now give me five minutes and we can get out of here. Deal?”

A glint of satisfaction flashes through your eyes as you give him a hum in return, thinking to yourself that maybe the silly questions could be more useful than you thought.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Cedric Diggory

The moment the words leave your mouth, Cedric's first reaction is to laugh. He didn't mean for it to come out in a condescending way. He hadn't even meant to laugh, to begin with. But judging by the way you pout with both arms crossed, that might just have been how it came accross.

"I'm sorry," he offers sheepishly. "you were saying?"

"You heard me. I said what I've said," you grumble, despite not being genuinely upset at the hufflepuff boy you've grown to love.

"Wait, I need to get this straight," he takes another breath of air. "You're serious?"

"What do you think?" you pout once again, turning away slightly from your boyfriend. This only seems to ignite his amusement as much as it does his guilt. A second or two later, his arm finds its way around your shoulder, the other brushing a few strands of hair behind your ear.

"You really haven't figured it out yet?" he asks with a genuine grin on his face. You begin to eye him curiously, appreciating the charm of his pearly white teeth as you wait for the boy to go on. Soon, he pulls you into his lap where his arms craddle you lovingly.

"Sunshine," he begins. "I'm surprised you still have to ask. But if that's one way of putting my love for you, then yes. You'd be my favorite worm in the entire world."

"Promise?" you present your pinkie finger as a final means to seal the deal.

With one last chuckle, he wraps his fingers around yours. "Promise."

Everything that happens next is a flurry of innocent pecks and kisses planted along your skin, coupled with the security of two warm arms holding you in place.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Draco Malfoy

"And what exactly do you expect me to say to that?" comes his first response after a long moment of trying to figure out just how in Merlin's name your mind came up with that question.

You, on the other hand, can't help but giggle at the slytherin boy's confusion. "Whatever's on your mind right now will do."

"Well, to be honest with you, I can't quite stomach the idea of my own girlfriend turning into a bloody worm." he nearly spits the words out, softening his edge only when your eyes meet once again. "If you were expecting a different answer, I suggest moving on to the next bloke."

Draco wasn't lying about that first bit. Worms have always been an insignificant, unseen creature in his world; wiggling in the muckiest of places where they could easily be stepped on. Hence, he doesn't like to imagine you—someone so perfectly ethereal and quintessential in every single way; the only source of light shining into his pathetic excuse of a life—to be compared to a dirty worm, of all things.

"That doesn't mean I don't love you, though," he adds in a bit of a guilty tone; voice much, much softer this time. He brings your hand to his lips, dropping a few kisses on its skin. "I just much prefer having you as you already are."

You snuggle deeper into him, indicating that you already know exactly what he means.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Fred Weasley

“A worm!” Fred exclaims, nearly forgetting the food on his plate altogether. "What a brilliant idea!"

A few seats away, you can already see Ginny clamping her mouth shut as to not burst into fireworks of laughter. You mirror her gesture, eyes now on Fred once again, watching him announce this idea of yours to your entire group of friends.

Ron, who's not that thrilled to see his brother's public displays of affection, lets out a groan. "Wouldn't have asked him that if I were you."

"You think so?" comes your reply. "He seems to be having a lot of fun with this." you both glance at Fred, who is indeed already coming up with some sort of thrilling plot.

"Did you hear that, George?"

"Sure did, Fred."

"I reckon we could come up with a potion for that," he muses, turning back to look at you. "Give me a week or two and we can start living out that worm dream of yours, love."

"Wait, Freddie, you're getting it all wrong," you begin explaining, tugging on the boy's sleeve slightly to keep his attention on you, "It was just a silly little question. I don't actually plan on turning into a worm or anything like that."

At this point, you half expect his enthusiasm to die down from the grounding effect of your words. In reality, it doesn't.

"S'that so?" he replies, earning a nod from you. "Looks like you're missing the bigger picture to me, (y/n). Isn't that right, George?"

"Right you are, Fred." the said boy affirms. "Sorry, (y/n). I'm with him on this one."

With a sigh, you turn back to Ron, who's busily stuffing his mouth with a look on his face that says I told you so. You shake your head with a small smile at your boyfriend's shenanigans. You're not sure how you can both dread and anticipate the day of his worm adventures.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

George Weasley

"That's a new one," he asserts with an amused laugh. The boy rests his head against one of his palms, feeling instantly intrigued by your proposition. "Now tell me more about this worm business of yours."

"That's about it, actually." you admit sadly.

George frowns at this, wishing he could hear more worm stories and whatnot. Mostly he's just happy to see the way you talk about things passionately. Makes him feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside in a way he can't ever get enough of.

"That's quite alright. I'll do the talking, then." he offers, rubbing his chin to think of what to say next. You light up in your seat, eyes wide in anticipation. Now it's your turn to eagerly wait for his response once again.

"I've got an idea. We could run off and start a new life— as worms!" he beams all of a sudden. You raise a brow for him to go on, not exactly complaining about your boyfriend's excitement towards the topic. "I'm only turning into a worm to make sure I can properly take care of you, of course. Wouldn't want to—er—squash you between my big human fingers, now do we?"

You both erupt into a chorus of laughter at the conjectured image, melting into one another like two fitting puzzle pieces. When you finally catch your breath again, you pose the main question once more, "So I'm concluding you're still going to love me, then?"

"Love you?" he repeats. "Oh darling, I'll be marrying you in a grand worm wedding!"

You can't hold back the gasp that escapes your lips, more than thrilled to have the first mention of marriage between you. Not too long after, you transform into a complete fit of giggles when George continues. "Then we'll happily live our worm lives, 'till death do us apart. Or when, you know, some bloke accidentally steps on us. Whichever comes first."

You lean into him lovingly to steady yourself after all the laughing. Taking a deep breath in, you mumble a soft, "You always know how to make me laugh, Georgie."

And the truth is, he wouldn't have it any other way. Worms or not.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Hermione Granger

"I'm sorry, I don't think I understand the point of this question."

"Which part, exactly?" you inquire, watching your girlfriend pull out another book from the wooden library shelves.

A few seconds pass before you get your answer. "You're not a worm," she states simply, eyeing you up and down as if to prove her point.

"Yes, thank you for pointing that out, 'Mione," you follow her to the next section. "Which is why I said if I turned into a worm."

The girl looks at you again, analyzing your words and expression briefly before coming to another conclusion. "I still don't understand." she pauses to think. "Unless you might be interested in becoming an Animagus? Even then, opting for a worm wouldn't be very... effective."

You roll your eyes, speeding up to block the girl's way. She lets out a non-committal "Hey!", only for you to quickly muffle it with a warm kiss. A moment or two later, you pull away with a smirk that makes her heart melt. "Just answer the question, would you?"

Still slightly caught off guard from the contact, Hermione finally caves in. "Alright, you cheeky flirt. I love you. Even as a notional worm."

Satisfied with her answer, you plant another peck— this time on her cheek, before announcing a gentle "I love you, too."

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Harry Potter

The way his lips purse into a straight line tells you that Harry doesn't exactly understand the question. Not really, at first. Aside from being an entirely foreign concept to his ears, it also seems like an odd thing to ask someone, unless— "Oh! You're an Animagus!"

The smile on your face instantly drops at this. "What? No—"

"Why didn't you just say so, (y/n)?" he begins what—at the time—you don't know is going to be a nearly endless ramble. "I was planning on telling you this for a while now, but I know someone who's an Animagus, actually. In fact, I think you two would get along fantastically!" he lights up at the sudden idea, flailing his arms in the air out of excitement. "Yes, maybe I can try getting the both of you to meet up. No promises, of course, but what do you think?"

"I think you've got it all wrong," you frown; knowing you would have to disappoint your boyfriend and how you're not very fond of the idea.

"What do you mean?" he asks, albeit barely giving you a second to reply. "(y/n), it's alright, really. You know you don't have to hide yourself from me. Besides, I think it's brilliant!— what you can do, I mean."

The smile he gives you is the epitome of love itself, and now you're not quite sure how to handle the messy situation without pulling out the rug underneath Harry's feet. All you can do is squeeze his shoulder with a guilty smile, promising to talk about it again after dinner.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Luna Lovegood

"Of course. Worms are lovely, don't you think?" she says with a dreamy smile. You gape at how easily the answer could be pried from your girlfriend; no questions asked. But then again, it's not like you hadn't expected this exact outcome already.

"Really?"

"Mhm," comes her gentle hum as she begins to stir her honeyed chamomile tea. A soft smile stays glued on her features, as if she's enjoying the conversation. "What kind of worm would you like to be, (y/n)?"

"I haven't really thought about it that far," You admit. "Are you sure, though? We won't be able to hold hands or anything like that."

You can't tell if you had just imagined the almost-frown tugging on her lips, because when she looks back up at you again, her sweet signature Luna smile is back in its place. "I suppose you're right. But I could carry you around everywhere with me. Wouldn't that be lovely?"

"It would be," you nod. "but can a worm even fit into that pocket of yours?" you question, noticing how hers are stuffed with unknown items; blades of grass sticking out ever so slightly. Flowers, perhaps.

"Oh, there's nothing to worry about. See?" she pulls out a couple of daisies and fairy foxgloves to reveal a now empty pocket. "Now, would you like some tea?"

You eagerly join her on the table, snuggling against your girlfriend ever so slightly as you both begin to talk about your day. The entire worm ordeal is slowly slipping out of your mind already.

━━━━━━━━━━━━━

Neville Longbottom

Neville stops in his tracks at your question, taking a moment to toss the idea back and forth in his mind before he can give you a proper answer. You nearly giggle when his face scrunches up, brows knit and lips parted as he innocently asks, “But why would you turn into a worm?”

"Neville, love, no. It's a hypothetical question."

His entire body relaxes at this, releasing what you assume is a breath of relief. "Oh. I thought you were being serious for a moment there."

You shake your head with a giggle, taking a step closer to adjust the scarf around your boyfriend's neck. "I'm just curious is all. Would you still love me, then?" you ponder.

"Yes! Of course!" comes his instant reply, hands balled up into fists that match the determination on his face. "I would get you a nice worm house with all your favorite flowers in it," he bends one of his gloved finger inwards, beginning to keep count of this hypothetical to-do list. "Would you still be able to have human food? Well, either way, I promise to feed you every single day!"

He pauses, only for a second or two. "Oh! And I'll sing you worm songs! Or maybe we can sing them together? I don't know if you would still be able to talk as a worm though."

You swiftly pull him into an affectionate hug, effectively bringing his rambling—as well as the entire worm topic—to an end. His hands sheepishly find their home around your waist, where he places them softly as if it's his first time hugging you. After all the months of being together, it certainly isn't.

"What was that for?" he dares himself to ask, avoiding your eye contact shyly.

"For being the most loving and adorable boyfriend I could ever ask for," you lean in to plant a soft, gentle kiss on his cheek. You don't miss the way he pulls up his scarf to hide the blossoming blush afterwards.

I have no idea why I wrote this either lol <3

🌷 draco taglist: @arossebyanyothername @kawaii-angelanne @thefandomplace @yuosmi @bbeauttyybbx @mywellspringoflife @slytherinsunrise @avatarbeeb @scarlet-says-hi @lunars @coldlilheart @beiahadid @justmimithings @soundsquid27 @youknowiloveyou-so @n3ssm0nique @ochrythum @explxsion @yaanasluv @autumnpleaves @booksmione @drxcomvlfx @the–queen-of-hell @aspiringsloth20 @runninglownad @snitches-at-dawn @badfvith

🌷 harry taglist: @teheharrypotter @badfvith

#blaise zabini x reader #cedric diggory x reader #draco malfoy x reader #fred weasley x reader #george weasley x reader #harry potter x reader #hermione granger x reader #luna lovegood x reader #neville longbottom x reader

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love-toxin · 3 years

Text

cw: injuries, yandere tohma, gn! reader

"so...how long do I have to play along with this little game of yours?"

the question spills out of his mouth without warning, yet each word is methodical, careful, like he's practiced it a thousand times before. the teapot clutched in your hands nearly slips out and shatters over the table you've laid out for the two of you, but the warmth of the porcelain fortunately keeps you steady enough until you can set it down in the space between you two. Tohma was kind enough to bring you a gift after spending awhile away, tending to his duties--so it's only natural that you would take him out for some tea in exchange. it's courtesy. it's expected.

but his question certainly is not.

"I...I have no idea what you're talking about, Tohma."

"really?"

he's sat cross-legged for some time now, waiting as you ordered the tea and offering you some idle chit-chat befitting a pair that haven't seen the other in a while. Tohma has always been your friend even when you were young, but as is custom in a place like Inazuma, your relationship has evolved throughout the years. there are things you can't say anymore, things that would ruin your life if you were caught doing them...and now, you fear, the glint in Tohma's eyes may be an omen that he's about to commit one of those unholy acts.

"come on now, sweetheart, everybody can see the truth for what it is. there's no need to hide it any longer."

he's purposely tiptoeing around the question, waiting for the pieces to click in your mind. he need not say anything at all, however--the way he looks at you in this moment, and the purpose with which he stands from his place at the tea table is enough to set your jaw tight and your eyes to darken.

"you know that I was always meant to be your husband. to be there for you through thick and thin, to care for you when we're both old and gray-"

he takes a few quick steps around it to get to you, to kneel at your side and reach out his hands to pull yours into them, and it's all you can do not to flinch away and risk the image of impropriety. but you've endured this lecture before, and the only thing screaming inside your head is for you to resist--just resist, don't listen to a word he says, and bite your tongue of any insult until he finally gives up and gets the hint.

"Tohma, stop."

"-to treasure you like no one else will. I understand your point of view, I really do--we're still young, and the world outside of Inazuma seems so big and grand...but you have to realize that the time to settle down is coming for us."

he rubs his thumb over your hand and smiles in your direction, but you can't meet his eyes. and then it's slipping out of your grasp and raising up to your face, and you feel yourself stiffen all over as Tohma gently cups your cheek, his gaze lowering towards your mouth as if he has an idea of what he wants to do. but that would be grounds for you to shriek for a guard, and you're entirely certain that that's the only reason he bites his lip to stave off the desire.

"you were always meant to be mine. you believe in fate, and you've always put your trust in me...so why not let me help you?"

that last part comes as a whisper, the tearoom private but the walls still thin. one of the many secrets you've entrusted to Tohma over the years is your disagreement with Inazuma's strict laws, as well as the etiquette that comes with being a member of the higher class. you've always despised being noble, and Tohma has always understood you, at least you thought so....but ever since he's gotten this ludicrous idea in his head, you've known even less peace than usual.

"I've said it a dozen times, Tohma, and I won't say it again. I'm not marrying you."

you do your best to spit the words out with as much venom as you can muster, yet you still feel the twinge of anxiety at snapping at him so informally. it could spell the end for you quite easily, but when your eyes are drawn back to Tohma's expression, all you can see is bliss written all over his face.

"...even laced with contempt, my name sounds so sweet on your lips. you've so much wit, so much grace, and your beauty leaves me breathless...I know how little you think of me, but-"

fury shoots through every vein of your body, and you know it's the wrong move when you slap his hand away from your face, the smack like a thunderclap in the small space of the little tearoom.

"enough, Tohma! enough. do yourself a favour and stop speaking to me--in fact, I dearly hope you never say a word to me again."

each finger on his hand twitches, only to close in a tight fist and sink back down to his lap. you try to avoid his gaze in this moment, but even turning your head away you can still feel his eyes staring right into your soul.

"you know I can't make that promise. you know that I love you."

that word makes you stiffen, your grip lock on your noble dressings, your blood turn to ice in your veins. you've avoided that for so long but it follows you like a demon, and it's eyes glow a verdant green as Tohma's words melt into your skin and eat you alive from the inside out.

"this feeling of yours....it's not mutual, Tohma. just leave it, and leave me."

you say so, but you're the one that stands from the tea table in the end, and Tohma jumps to get to his feet to follow you. he trails on your heels as you step with purpose towards the door and slide it open, the cool chill of Inazuma city in the night prickling your exposed skin. the blond hurries to get in front of you, and the moment you spot a few other citizens on the path this late at night, you tilt your head down and pray to the gods that Tohma won't force you into impropriety.

"...I see. you won't budge on this, then...I will have to accept that. but may I at least escort you home? I can't in good faith allow you to wander alone in the dark. I still care for you."

he looks down on you with a softness to his features, and you hate how easily you buckle under any sort of pressure from him. you prided yourself on not giving in before, but when you're not alone it's not nearly as easy--you have to piece your words so carefully together, and by the time you think of an excuse it will already be too late for you to reject his offer. so with as subtle of a huff as you can manage, you speak softly under your breath that you suppose that's fine, and grit your teeth as you thank him for the offer. and Tohma is all too relieved to stand beside you as you walk down the hill and leave the prying ears of the city, the silence near unbearable between you as you meander through the path cut down the middle of the farmer's fields.

"seems there's no one around. not a surprise for this time of the night."

it's not a terribly long walk back to your family's estate, but Tohma still evidently feels the need to speak up as you reach the end of the gently sloping hill. Konda village lies within sight in the distance, and you feel the tension weigh heavy on your heart as you count the steps closer and closer to safety. relative safety that is.

you're so focused on paying him as little attention as possible that you don't even take notice to his hand drawing closer to yours and his eyes wandering up and down your figure, practically salivating as the flames in his chest burn hotter and hotter, until the moment he can't take any more and he grabs you by the shoulders to stop you and force you to look him straight in the eyes.

"now, you're going to listen very closely. I'm going to give you a little gift, because I love you so very much. you get a minute's head start."

the shock catches you off guard to the point that you bite your own tongue, fear and panic shooting through you like icicles that make you freeze in place. Tohma's expression is so intense he nearly appears feral, pearly teeth glimmering in the light from the moon as he grins down at you like a predator examining their prey.

"here's the deal, sweetheart--if you can run all the way past Konda village, you win. but if I catch you, I win, and you must uphold your promise and marry me in a month's time. and if you win, you'll get your wish--I'll never speak a word to you again."

terror grips you even harder than Tohma is, and at his proposal you whip your head towards the village in the distance and then back to him. if he's seriously not making some kind of sick joke, then there's absolutely no way you would ever make it. you're not a fighter, you don't even know how to hold a sword much less have a vision, and you've seen the kinds of things Tohma is capable of....he'll catch you before you make it anywhere close.

"Tohma-"

his gaze lingers on you for a moment, before he turns you in the direction of the village and pushes you forward, only hard enough for you to stumble a bit. you want to question him, to try and talk him down from such an insane idea, but once you hear him start counting down aloud your feet move on their own and you take off in a pitiful run down towards your target. the night air whips by your face as you try to sprint as best you can, yet your robes that give away your nobility get caught on your sandals and trip you up enough that it makes your heart jump into your throat. your heart pounds in a cage that feels too tight, the air heavy and raw in your lungs the longer you fumble your way forwards in the night. even your tears feel cold as they stream down your face, and if speaking wouldn't expend your precious energy then you would surely be wailing for Tohma to stop, please, he's scaring you. especially once you hear his footsteps take off, and it feels as though his warm breath is right on the back of your neck.

but even so, you look up within moments to find yourself in the middle of the quiet little village, the lanterns dim and only the glow of the moon casting light on the humble little buildings. the panic ceases but resurges just as quickly when you remember that you're not safe yet, that the entrance to the village is still a few hundred metres away--and you can hear Tohma panting now, at a distance close enough that he'll make a grab for you long before you'll ever get there. but there's something you know that he probably doesn't remember, and it might just be your saving grace as you duck into the shadows and skirt around the mayor's house just as he skids into the path of the village. you fear in the pit of your stomach that getting the top off the well that you used to play near as children would make a great deal of noise, but you hurry forward and find it open--and just as you swing a leg over to climb inside and pray that Tohma doesn't think to look for you here, your foot slips on the stone that's still damp from the rain and your world is overturned as you fall through the air. it's not far enough that you can scream or grab for purchase on something, but when you land you hear the sickening crack of something breaking and pain that shoots through your leg so quick that it almost makes you black out.

but something worse is yet to come, and it's Tohma's voice calling out your name, before you look up to the sky and your heart just sinks as you watch his face pop into view over the side of the well.

"oh, archons--baby, are you all right?! did you hurt yourself?"

he hops over the edge quite easily and falls steady on his feat, not even having broken a sweat from chasing you as he hurries to your side and props you up in the crook of his arm. and despite still feeling that twinge of discomfort and panic from him touching you, the agony sets in so deeply that you cling to him without realizing as tears pour down your face and you struggle to breathe.

"let me see...yeah, that's definitely broken. c'mere, I'll help you up.."

just brushing the pads of his fingers over the rapidly-swelling skin of your calf makes you flinch and cry out with pain, and it's obvious by the deep bruising how bad you've hurt it--you wouldn't be able to climb out of here if you tried. but Tohma finds so little trouble in heaving you up into his arms that it's laughable....it would be funny how sincerely you thought you could get away in the first place, if you weren't experiencing the consequences now. and only now is it starting to sink in that you lost, even though he isn't rubbing it in your face. yet.

"poor thing--that was scary, wasn't it? aren't you glad I was here?"

despite how despairing you look, he rubs his cheek against yours as he holds you tight. you realize now how much he's always wanted to do this, and how he's dragging this all out while he has the chance to do it without anyone watching....it's such a rare opportunity, but you don't feel nearly as lucky as he does.

"I'll always be here, sweetie....in sickness and in health, right?"

he murmurs into the shell of your ear, before pressing a kiss to it right afterwards as he reaches out to get a foothold so he can lift you out of here. all you can think about now is how your chance of escaping him has slipped away....and now, your status is a death sentence in the hands of the man who saved your life, and will ask for nothing in return but your gentle hand in marriage. how romantic.

#tohma #tohma x reader #tohma genshin impact #thoma x reader #thoma genshin #genshin impact #yandere tohma #yandere thoma #yandere genshin impact #yandere genshin x reader

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one-sad-human · 3 years

Text

•Pinky Promises• Steven Adler

Pairing: Steven Adler x Reader, Axl Rose x Sibling! Reader

Requested? Yup! By an anon

Theme: Angst(?) to fluff

Warnings: Language, sexual references but nothing explicit

Word Count: 1.8k

A/N: Fic 1 of 2! Hope you enjoy! Also, the makeout near the end gets sorta hot and it was pretty fun to write? Like I’m considering exploring into writing smutter pieces. I didn’t want to originally because I thought I’d cringe all the way through and hate the result but I might try it out in the near future. Nothing too crazy but it’s something for me to think about.

You step off of the large bus, your combat boots hitting the ground as you adjust the bag slung over your shoulder. It's stuffed to the brim with whatever you threw in, you're surprised the zipper did burst.

You take a deep breath of the LA air. It's hot and humid and despite the thick air pollution, you can breath easier than you did in Indiana.

You grew up in Lafayette, Indiana with your older half-brother William. You were raised in the hellish house with your shared father, which you finally managed to escape.

William left right at eighteen. He tried taking you with him, but you didn't want him to be charged with kidnapping and have the cops on his ass. Now, two years and your father's stolen wallet later, you're finally in the city of dreams.

"Will!" You yell out, spotting your redheaded other half.

"Y/N!" He mocks, catching your figure in a crushing hug. He's taller than you, so you have to stand on your tippy toes during the embrace. "Thank God you're alright."

"I'm fine, I'm happy to finally see you again," you say, a huge grin on your face. "How's the band? Everything going well?"

"Well enough," he says with a shrug, grabbing your heavy bag and slinging it around his shoulder. "Come on, I'll introduce you to the guys. You already know Izzy of course, but the rest of them."

The walk to the 'hell house' as Will had called it is filled with catching up. He made sure to keep in contact with you, but the phone calls were always short. It felt nice to have a full length conversation in person with your brother again.

"Welcome home," Will says, leading you into the house. You grimace when you catch a whiff of stale beer and weed.

"You seriously live here? This place should be condemned," you say with disgust.

"And then where would we live?" The oh-so familiar voice of Will's best friend meets your ears. You whip around and fly into his arms.

"Jeffery! I missed you so much! You really should've tried calling, you ass!" You exclaim. Izzy rolls his eyes but smiles nonetheless, patting your back during the hug.

"Who's this?" Another man enters the living room— if that's what it should even be called. He's blonde, taller than you but shorter than the other two men in the room. He has kind eyes and the smile he has on his handsome face leaves you speechless.

"U-uh, hi. I'm Y/N," you say after a moment of shameless gawking. If he noticed, he doesn't mention it.

"Oh that's right! Axl talks a lot about you! I'm Steven," he says and bounds up to you, catching your hand in a shake. You don't question who the hell 'Axl' is, but you smile stupidly at him and bite your lip with a blush staining your face.

"No," Will says, glaring at the cute blonde you've taking an immediate liking to. "Absolutely not."

"William!" You squeak out, pinching his shoulder harsher. He yelps and swats your hand away. Will glares further at you as he ushers you up the creaky stairs to your room. "Nothing happened! And who the fuck is 'Axl'?"

"I saw how you were looking at him! I'm not naive, Y/N. You were giving him the 'fuck me' eyes! And me, everyone calls me Axl here." You give him a look. "Except you, of course. You can call me Will."

You don't give him another word as he leads you to your bedroom. He was the one who didn't have a roommate before, and he'd have to share with Slash now but he was determined to give you your privacy.

"This is the only room with a working lock, use it. Especially when your changing! Three horny men in a house with one you isn't a good combo." You make a face and shake your head, but you can't really tell if he's being overprotective or if his band mates really are pigs.

"Are you not including Izzy?"

"Please, he's the only smart one besides me. He knows I'll rip him a new one." You laugh and give Will another hug.

"I've really missed hanging out with you like this, and thank you for letting me stay here." He nods and rubs your back.

"No problem, we have each other's backs, always." You nod and release your bother from the hug. "One rule though: no hooking up with the guys. One time thing or not, you don't know them like I do, I won't let you get hurt. So don't even try anything with Steven!"

"Even if it's nothing sex?" Will levels you with a look that would make you sweat if you were anyone else. You sigh and roll your eyes. "Fine! I promise."

"Pinky promise?" He asks, holding out his pinky finger. You shake your head but comply anyway, hooking your pinky on his.

"Wow, bringing out the big guns, pinky promises," you tease.

"Bitch," he mumbles. You gasp sarcastically.

"Asshole!" You reply. William takes his leave with another slew of insults under his breath but none to be taken seriously and all with a smile. You shut your door after him and lay on your bed, content with how things are finally beginning to look up.

If you knew where you would be in just a few months of living with your brother and his band, you never would've agreed to the naive promise Will had forced on you. You think back to the day with a frown.

"Whatcha thinkin' about?" Steven asks, pecking your bare shoulder as he lays behind you on your bed. You both lay naked and damp with sweat, glowing from the moonlight streaming in the room.

"William," you say with a sigh.

"We just had sex and your thinking of your brother? Should I be worried about you?" Steven asks teasingly. You fight the smile growing on your face and lightly pinch the his arm tightly wrapped around you. He never fails to make you laugh.

"I just feel bad keeping this a secret from him." You turn around to be face to face with Steven. "It's been months of sneaking around. I'm always nervous we'll get caught together or I'll blurt it out to him."

"Then why don't we just tell him?"

"Do you want to die! Steven, honestly, do you have a death wish?"

"No, but—"

"Then we can't tell my brother we're together. He'll murder you, and then probably me one he finds out how long I've been lying to him," you say and move your head in the crook of Steven's neck.

"Then we can be together in the afterlife!" Steven folds his arms around you even tighter. "Seriously though, we can't lie to him forever. We've been together for six months already, surely he'll see how much we care about each other and not want to kill us."

"Yeah, maybe," you say halfheartedly and close your eyes, finally letting yourself fall asleep.

The next night, Guns has a gig at the Whiskey A-Go Go. The ritual goes like it has been, they play the gig, you wait for Will to get drunk, and you and Steven sneak out to the back of the club to make out and maybe get felt up a bit before returning like nothing happened.

It isn't different this time. Steven's hands leave your skin ablaze as he lets them wander down your sides and up your thighs. His lips don't leave yours, even as he squeezes your ass and you let out a moan. He grins on your mouth and presses his pelvis up to your stomach.

His mouth leaves yours to press feather light kisses to your cheek before trailing down your jaw and onto your neck, where he sucks nips at. You have to press a hand to your mouth to stay quiet.

"Don't leave marks," you remind him through batted breath.

"I won't," he reassures and silences you with a chaste kiss to your swollen lips before returning his attack on your neck.

You hear footsteps fast approaching, but as quickly as you hear them, Steven is ripped away from you. He's slammed into the brick wall next to you harshly and groans. You jump away and gasp.

"What the fuck do you think you're doing?" William asks, his voice lower than usual. His green eyes dark and downright scary.

"Will! Let him go, come on. Stop fucking around, you didn't have to slam him into a wall," you say, but your shaky voice falls on deaf ears as Will doesn't move. Your hands grasp at his arm and try to yank him away from Steven, but he's stronger and taller than you and doesn't budge, he just keeps his eyes focused on Steven.

"Nothing!" He squeaks out. Even in the dark, his kiss bruised lips and flushed red face is obvious.

"'Nothing?' That's why you were ten seconds away from fucking Y/N?" Will asks.

"William stop it! You're scaring me! Leave him alone!" You push him again and this time, he relents. Will paces and runs his hand through his red locks while you rush to make sure Steven is ok.

"I'm fine, I'm fine," Steven mutters and presses a kiss to your brow to comfort you, sending you a smile when he pulls away. He keeps his hands on your arms and rubs circles with his thumbs.

"How long has this been going on?" Will asks, crossing his arms as he finally stops his pacing.

"Six months..." Steven says nervously. William scoffs and shakes his head. "But it isn't just fucking around! I love them, Ax. Really."

You smile bashfully, biting your lip to try and contain it. You knew you felt strongly for Steven and that he returned the feelings, but you haven't outright said you loved each other— until know of course.

Will stays silent for a few beats, staring contemplative at Steven. He finally sighs, bring a hand up to rub his temples like he has a building headache.

"Yeah? And you love him, Y/N?" He asks. You nod, reaching out to grab Steven's hand. Steven lets a grin creep on to his face. "Then I guess I can't stop you. But if you ever break their heart, I'll fucking gut you, Adler."

If Will makes Steven nervous, he doesn't show it. He gives him a salute with his puppy dog like smile before sticking out his pinky.

"I promise I'll never hurt Y/N purposely, ever." Will rolls his eyes, the irony makes him nearly groan aloud. He sucks it up anyway when he sees your hopeful expression, hooking his pinky onto Steven's.

"Don't make me regret this, Steven," Will grumbles before leaving and walking back into the crowded club. Steven lets out an exhilarated laugh and kisses you, hard.

"Told you he wouldn't kill me!" Steven exclaims, making you laugh out of surprise.

"And we don't have to sneak around anymore!" Steven kisses you again, and again and again until you're breathless.

"I'm so in love with you," he mumbles between his attack on your lips. You smile, tangling your hands in his aqua-net filled hair.

"As I am with you."

#classic rock imagine #guns n’ roses #guns n’ roses x reader #guns n’ roses imagine #80s #steven adler fluff #steven adler imagine #steven adler x reader #steven adler #axl rose x reader #axl rose imagine #axl rose fanfic #axl rose

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sirthisisa-wendys · 3 years

Text

Investigations (Part 6): Ran Haitani x Fem!Reader

wc: 1.8k

tw: NSFW

masterlist

song recommendation:

"Mommy, you're getting bigger!"

The slapping of Kai's shoes on the wood flooring, his little body rushing toward you with his arms spread wide, is enough to make you forget the emptiness you felt like an ache in your soul.

"Kai, don't say that..."

Ran chastises him, coming through the door with the Paw Patrol bag slung over his suited shoulder.

"It's fine," you reply, squatting down to hold your son close. "He's just a kid." Ran doesn't respond. He just slides the backpack off his shoulder and shuts your apartment door, sitting it on the marble counter before walking around the fixture slowly.

"Packed five changes of clothes," he begins, ticking off his fingers. "Snacks and a water bottle. Some toys. And the books you wanted."

"Thanks," you whisper, unzipping the backpack to check if he made sure the clothes were matching this time.

"Y/n..." You sigh, feeling Ran's fingers slide up your hips and rest on your small bump. "You should really reconsider this. You're going to need help with the baby, and--"

"Ran." You don't face him; you can't look at his sad eyes. They're too convincing... Too alluring. You'd separated for a reason, not because you wanted to play coy. "We need to get through counseling before I can consider anything."

"I miss you." The words are like a siren's call to your heart, and you want to turn around. You want to hold him and kiss him and... But he'd just do the same thing over and over again. His lies would become more convincing, and you'd be in dire straits, all while sleeping next to a lying manipulator.

You decide the heartbreak isn't worth it.

"I'll see you on Sunday evening." Ran gets the hint. His hands slip away from your body and he says a soft "bye, champ" to Kai before walking out of the door.

_____________________________________________________________

You remember the day Ran came to get you like it was yesterday.

Cliche, but true.

He'd stormed into the little home Taiju had allowed you to remain in, his violet eyes blazing with anger and betrayal. Taiju followed behind him, yellow eyes apologetic and maybe even a little guilty.

"I'm sorry, y/n," Taiju whispered, hanging his head. "I--"

"Pack your things." Ran grabbed you by the wrist, yanking you toward the room you'd just emerged from, but you snatched it back, snapping,

"Fuck off."

In a split second, Ran had his hand raised in the air, poised to slap the taste out of your mouth without a second thought. But he stopped himself, remembering where he was. Who he was with. And who you were.

Taiju yanked you behind him in the milliseconds between Ran raising his hand and the thought of slapping you crossing his mind, full of fury.

"You can hit me, but if you hit her..." The threat stood between the two men, holding them apart with the promise of violence beyond your rashest fears.

"I want a divorce," you croaked.

Ran's eyes softened, and his mind flitted from the "I" to the "want" to the "a" and settled on "divorce".

"Y/n, please, I--"

"I want a fucking divorce."

The drive home with Taiju was the longest drive you'd ever endured.

And then you found out... you were pregnant. The timing couldn't have been worse. You only told Taiju - mainly because he would end up being the godfather due to the circumstances - but when you asked for a divorce, you had moved out.

Ran committed to helping pay for your apartment while you looked for a job, but once you found one as an administrative assistant to someone your family knew, you rejected any and all payments. Kai was shared between the two of you without a court order (you got weekends, he got weekdays), and you'd gotten used to living on your own for the first time in over five years.

And Kai... Kai hadn't understood why Mommy wouldn't be with him Monday through Friday. But Ran tried to explain it in soft tones and gentle hand-holding, and somehow it sunk in that Mommy needed to "work" and Daddy would do most of the caretaking while you worked hard for your independence.

But as the weeks passed, signs appeared, and Ran caught on pretty quickly with his methodical calculations and scrutinizing eyes. And when he found out you were pregnant and hadn't told him?

You sat through a half-hour-long, tear-filled speech that emphasized that Ran would be a part of the child's life in any and every way possible. Through that conversation, though, you agreed to marriage counseling. So... maybe it was good that he found out the way he did.

_____________________________________________________________

"Mr. Haitani, do you want this marriage to work for you or against you?"

"What kind of question is that?" Ran scoffs, crossing his arms.

"It's the kind of question that just might save you from being divorced and alone."

You can see Ran soften, uncrossing his arms and leaning his head on his propped-up hand.

"I want it to work."

"And Mrs. Haitani? Same question." When the woman turns to you, you feel something in your own heart crack, and for a moment, you think it's the pregnancy hormones that are making you cry. But you shake your head at yourself, wiping your eyes preemptively.

"I want it to work. For us. I don't want Kai to be without a father." A pause. "And I don't want to be without my husband." You don't see how Ran reacts because you're too busy sobbing into your own hands, feeling every single emotion you've held at bay come crashing down on you. But the large couch dips, and Ran places his arm around you, enveloping you in a hug as you weep.

"Then we need to rebuild trust before we can get to true reconciliation. Can I recommend something?"

"Please," Ran replies.

"Spend this evening just being honest with each other. Nothing distracting you two, just the two of you and your truth. Mr. Haitani, you need to be open enough to be honest and give her the answers to any questions she might have. And Mrs. Haitani, you need to do the same."

_____________________________________________________________

You're sitting between Ran's legs, staring at the crackling fire while he rests his large hands on your knees.

"Ask me anything."

The floor is open. The first question that comes to mind is:

"How long have you been in gangs?"

"Since I was thirteen." Seventeen years... This is a way of life for Ran.

"You've killed a man before." A statement, not a question.

"Many. But never for fun." You turn to look at him, and Ran looks down at you, raising his brows. "Never. And very rarely these days." South.

"Did you ever think about leaving?"

"All the time. The first time was when you and I got married. Then when we had Kai... then when you found out."

"And what's stopping you?" Ran thinks long and hard.

"It wouldn't make you trust me any more than you do now." You nod, quirking your lips to the left. That is true. "But also... I want to provide for both of you. I can't leave without some consequences. And we'd never be safe. But I can provide safety for us if I'm in power."

That is also true.

"Can I ask a question?" Ran whispers.

"Of course."

"Do you really want to divorce me?" You stare at the flames again, the answer very clear for the both of you. You just have to say it out loud.

"No." Ran sighs, dropping his head on your shoulder.

"I can't be without you." You lean your head on his and close your eyes, letting his lips press against your skin. "Please, come home."

"When we finish counseling," you promise. "I'll come home."

"Can you stay with me tonight, though?" You hesitate, but Ran cups your neck in his hand, whispering "please" into your skin and you give in. What good is it to fight the thing you want? To fight the man you need?

You kiss Ran with everything that you are, turning around to embrace him gently. You run your hands through his hair, tugging the short locks slightly as he lifts you onto his lap and kisses you deeply.

"Never leave me again," Ran pants, running his hands up your back. "Please. I felt like I could barely breathe without you."

"Never break my trust again," you reply, and Ran hums softly, littering kisses all over your face. "And I won't ever leave you."

Your lovemaking is slow and thoughtful in front of the fire, Ran's hands holding your hips with feather-light touches, and swiping your hair away from your face whenever he can't see your eyes staring back at him. It's this type of sex that Ran seems to take the most pleasure in... the closeness, the sweetness, the passion... it's all wrapped up in his soul, and he's pouring it out to you without words.

"I want you to be happy here," Ran grunts, stroking your g-spot with his skilled length and kissing the swell of your breasts at the same time. "With me."

You moan, and Ran opens his mouth to speak again.

"And I want you to be safe." He pauses, swirling a nipple around with his tongue. "And warm..." Ran's hands move from your hips to your face, and he leans down to brush his nose against yours. "And mine."

"You're all that I am," you breathe, and Ran's eyes light up, remembering the part of your vows you had said on your wedding day, which were completely unscripted.

"And you are all that I will be." His reply makes you arch your back upward, and you shake as he brings you to your climax, stroking all of the right spots and tending to your every need.

"R-Ran..."

"Shhh... Kai's sleeping. Don't want to wake him, do you?" Ran teases as your body clenches around his cock. "Gotta be quiet or-- fuck, fuck... Oh, my god..." Ran shudders, cumming inside of you with stuttering hips and fingers gripping your hands in his. When you both slow your pants and come down from your highs, Ran pulls you up and onto his body, leaning back onto the soft, plush carpet - and still inside of you.

You both stare into the fire, tangled and merged with one another by a red thread.

"I can't let go of you," Ran murmurs, and you look up at him in question. A tear tracks from the corner of his eye, and you swipe at it, pressing a kiss to his lips.

"You don't have to." You lay back down on his chest, trying to remain awake and relish this time with him, but you feel yourself slipping, falling, crashing into a deep sleep, one you've needed for a long time.

#ran haitani smut #tokyorev smut #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers smut #ran haitani x reader #ran haitani

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ryangosking · 3 years

Text

Deserve

Summary: You broach a tricky subject with Bucky. Recovering / soft Bucky x female reader. Angst / fluff / smut.

Warnings: 18+ for sexual content. Unprotected sex. Language.

A.N: I kept meaning to write for Steve but this happened. I usually write for Boyd Holbrook characters on my sideblog - Masterlist.

I didn’t tag anybody but let me know if you’d like to be, possibly a part 2 or a prequel to this. I’d like to thank @ionlyjoinedforboydholbrook for her constructive feedback! It’s my first time writing for Bucky so please be kind!

Your heart skips a beat when you see Bucky waiting outside your office building, holding a bunch of flowers no less. He's awkwardly leaning against a wall, eyes darting around searching for you.

"You shouldn't have." You smile as you approach him.

"I was just passing." He murmurs, cheeks flushing as you kiss him.

"Passing a flower stall too?" You ask, accepting the blooms.

"Yeah, I guess so." He smiles.

"Mr Barnes, sorry to bother you." A voice pipes up. You turn and vaguely recognise the guy, you've seen him in the office building. What does he want with Bucky though?

Bucky eyes him warily. "Do I know you?"

"Oh no, I'm uh....I'm a big fan." the guy stammers, starting to sweat.

"So you're a fan of my work as the Winter Soldier or...”

"No no, I mean since then. Saving the world and everything."

"Sure, thanks." Bucky sighs.

You kind of feel for the guy, Bucky wasn't exactly known for accepting compliments, you know that better than anyone.

"Hey, can I get a selfie?" the guy asks, pulling out his phone.

"He's off duty, sorry." You say diplomatically, taking Bucky’s arm. "Let's get going."

"I'll never get used to that, " Bucky mumbles, as you steer him away from his fan. "I spent so much effort trying to hide and now..." He trails off.

"You saved the world, that's what people know you for now." You say, determined to put a positive spin on things.

"It wasn't just me." He says, as you cross the street. He moves his arm and grabs your hand instead, squeezing lightly. He's wearing gloves as is usual in public, concealing his gleaming hand in black leather.

You fall into a companionable silence as you head in the direction of your apartment. You can't help noticing that you're taking the route that happens to pass Bucky's favourite diner - where you first met in fact, a little over four months ago.

"Feel like coffee and pie?" He asks casually.

You grin at his predictability. "Sure."

Your flowers sit on the table in a kindly donated water jug as you and Bucky tuck into pie and ice cream, apple and cherry respectively.

"This...is...the...best...pie." Bucky says between mouthfuls.

"I knew you were going to say that." You tease.

He smiles, his eyes twinkling and crinkling at the corners. Oh, he seems so happy and relaxed, you impulsively decide to broach a tricky subject, figuring now to be a good a time as any.

"So, you know my sister's getting married in a couple of weeks." You begin, glancing at him as you toy with your food.

Bucky's eyes flicker and he fills his mouth with pie. "Hm-hmm." He mumbles.

You take a deep breath. "Well, I was wondering if you'd consider coming with me, as my plus one?"

He pales a little and offers a tentative smile. "I don't know sweetheart."

"Clare wants to meet you, that's all. You don't even have to stay for the full day, just to say hello."

"Sounds more like a family thing." Bucky says tightly, shifting in his seat.

"Well yeah," you swallow, feeling yourself flush. "But you are my....I mean..."

He sighs. "I don't think it's a good idea, you saw what happened outside your office. Imagine that times a hundred."

"Everyone will be focused on the wedding, my family won't bug you, I promise. They aren’t like that.”

Bucky scoffs. “You might be surprised how brave people get after a couple glasses of champagne.”

You sigh impatiently, feeling something inside you break. "What are we doing here Bucky?"

"I thought we were eating pie." He half-smiles.

"You know what I mean. Us." You hated to push him like this, you really did, and you already knew that he wouldn’t react favourably to it, but your developing relationship had seemed to come to a standstill lately.

"We agreed to take things slowly, didn’t we? One day at a time." He says quietly, reaching for your hand.

"But that was four months ago, I thought that we might have progressed beyond that by now. It's like one step forward two steps back with you." You say, your voice cracking with emotion.

"You're not my shrink, ok?" He snaps suddenly.

You slide your hand away from his and reach for your bag, tears forming in your eyes.

"I'm going home." You say softly..

"Don't go, please. I'm sorry." He says, looking up at you, a note of quiet desperation in his voice.

"Enjoy your pie." You sniff, not looking at him. You’re halfway home before you realise that you've left the flowers on the table.

X - X - X

By the time you get home you're angry with yourself more than anything else, cursing the fact that you even mentioned the wedding. You had agreed to take things slowly, but the truth is that you’re falling for Bucky and you want him to be a bigger part of your life. The wedding seemed like the ideal opportunity to introduce him to your friends and family, but on reflection, you realise how overwhelming it might be.

Half an hour later when there's a knock at the door, you know that it's Bucky. He's carrying the flowers, still in the water jug.

"The waitress said we could have this, I think she just felt sorry for me." He chuckles dryly, following you into the living room.

You can’t help but smile at the image of him walking down the street with the flowers.

"I'm sorry." You murmur, setting the flowers on your coffee table.

"Why are you sorry? I was a jerk back there." Bucky frowns.

"I shouldn't have pushed you like that."

"You weren't pushing." He sighs.

"I spooked you.” You say softly, looking up at him.

"Yeah." He smiles. "A little. Look, I’m still trying to figure this out."

"I know. Me too. I've never been in a relationship like this."

"I should hope not." He says wryly.

You chuckle, fighting the urge to just throw youself into his arms.

"I like you, so much." Bucky murmurs, his eyes searching yours as he strokes your face. "But I can't help thinking that you'd be better off with someone else."

Your stomach drops. "No, Bucky-”

"I mean like someone who doesn't get spooked when you want to do regular relationship stuff, it's not fair on you." He says, brow furrowed.

"Look, forget the wedding, I'll ask one of my friends to come."

"It's not just the wedding though is it?" He sighs.

“I don’t want anybody else.” You state firmly, placing your hand on his chest - you can feel his ever present dog tags through the thin material of his sweater.

"You've been so patient with me, it's more than I deserve."

"This is what you deserve." You say, and kiss him gently on the cheek. "And this." then corner of his mouth. "And this." finally the hollow of his throat.

He lets out a soft groan and grips the nape of your neck, kissing you deeply, opening your mouth with his tongue. He tastes of cherry and vanilla, his lips soft but insistent.

"I want you." He breathes. "I want you."

Without a word, you take his hand and lead him to the bedroom. Bucky was so gentle and hesitant when you first started sleeping together, terrified of hurting you with his strength and self-conscious of his arm. You managed to convince him that you could take - even sometimes desired - a little roughness. He loved to take his time undressing you, kissing and touching your soft flesh as he went. And when you reciprocated, he'd been touch starved for so long that the feeling of your hands and lips on him was almost enough.

Tonight he didn't deviate, pulling off your clothes and kissing you everywhere as you laid on the bed. He hovers over you, still half dressed, and you stroke his hair, fingers entwined in the short strands as his lips travel down your body, making you squirm. Finally he kneels between your legs and tugs at your panties, eyes dark with lust.

"James." You sigh, touching yourself, wetness coating your fingertips.

"You're so beautiful." He says gruffly, eyes focused on you as he removes his jeans. You'd seen him naked a number of times now but you never failed to be impressed by his magnificence, even his cock, now hard and leaking at the tip, is a thing of beauty.

You hold your hand out for him to return to the bed but his hands reach for your waist, indicating for you to turn over; you comply and he moves behind you, lifting your hips and pushing into you in one swift movement. You cry out as he fills and stretches your pussy, digging your fingers into the mattress as you back up against him.

"Does that feel good, sweetheart?" He growls.

"Yes, please...don't stop." You mewl, as he buries his cock to the hilt.

Bucky’s flesh hand is between your legs, fingering your aching clit, while his metal one still grips your hip. You place your hand over his, interlacing your fingers with his vibranium digits.

The rhythmic clink of Bucky's dog tags and the sound of your soft cries fill the air, he continues to work your clit in tight circles as he moves inside you, leaning down to pepper kisses on your shoulder - it isn't long before you feel the familiar tightness building at your core.

"Oh, Bucky, I'm going to-" you trail off as he drives into you harder, making you come apart and you moan loudly as your orgasm rolls through you in hot waves.

Compared to you, Bucky's almost silent, quietly panting and groaning, his hold on you tightening as you feel him throbbing into you.

Afterwards he spoons you, his bionic arm around your waist like a vice, kissing your hair.

"Look, about the wedding-" He starts.

"We don't have to talk about it now." You yawn. “Let’s leave it until tomorrow. One day at a time.”

“One day at a time.” Bucky repeats, softly.

#bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x female reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes smut #recovering bucky

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helloalycia · 3 years

Text

The Wrong Lifetime – Eight // Wanda Maximoff

chapter seven | story masterlist | main masterlist | wattpad | chapter nine

author’s note: Y/C/N = your cousin’s name, also this is later than I wanted today but i’ve been super busy so sorry for that! Also, I’ll be responding to comments from the last one as soon as I’m free. Enjoy 😊

"...okay, so now use the water to dilute the colour."

I did as Wanda said, dipping my brush in the glass of water and diluting the watercolour I was using, but I must have used too much because it made the paint run and then the paper started to get too damp to hold together.

Wanda facepalmed, sighing as I smiled sheepishly.

"My bad...?"

She glared playfully before ripping a page from her sketchbook. "Try again, milaya (darling). And use less water this time."

I squinted in the sun as I glanced at her. "Can't you just accept I'm not very good at painting? Or art in general?"

She shook her head, taking the torn page from my grasp and replacing it with a new one. "No way. You're not getting out of it that easily. It's not hard, I promise!"

I groaned lightheartedly. "You said that about drawing. And about using acrylics. And about using chalk."

"And I'm saying it about this, now c'mon, try again," she encouraged with an amused smile before returning to her own painting.

We were sat in my garden, hanging out and making the most of the lovely day we were having. The Spring breeze was getting warmer as we transitioned into Summer and it was a nice change of pace from the usual bad weather we had. So nice that Wanda wanted to do some painting and also teach me how to. But art was never my strong suit and I'm sure she knew that but still proceeded to try anyway.

Sketching out the tree before us for the third time today, I attempted to provide an outline that I could eventually fill in with green watercolours. Unlike Wanda though, it wasn't fun. My eyes veered over to her and I smiled to myself as I admired the look of concentration on her face – her 'art' look, I dubbed it. It was this very specific expression she got whenever she worked on a painting or drawing, and it always reminded me of that first time I saw it, after we met in the stationary store and when she took me back to her room. Absolutely wonderful.

"I don't hear a pencil moving," she said, not looking up but beginning to smile.

"That's because I'm looking for... what did you call it?" I racked my brain, thinking back to the day in the store when she talked about inspiration. "Vdokhoventi?"

A sharp exhale escaped her lips as she finally lifted her gaze to meet mine. Attempting not to laugh, she tilted her head adorably. "Vdokhnoveniye."

I quirked a brow. "Is that not what I said?"

She giggled, shaking her head. "Definitely not."

I grinned, shrugging. "Well, that's what I meant."

She rolled her eyes playfully. "I'm not it, so eyes on your page."

"Oh, how dearly mistaken you are, love," I said quietly, leaning close and giving her a knowing smile.

She looked up, expression softening with a smile. Her eyes were heavenly, pupils dilated as she squinted in the sun, and they flickered to my lips before she settled on nudging me in the shoulder slightly. I snickered, leaning my head on her shoulder since everybody thought we were as close as best friends, so it wouldn't look suspicious. She sighed contently, letting me watch as she moved her paintbrush, painting a flower that was peeking through the grass we were sat on.

I could have stayed there forever, in that moment, sitting with Wanda and watching her paint under the sun. But of course, all good things come to an end when you don't want them to.

"Y/N, dear," I heard my father call, and when I looked up, I saw him approaching Wanda and I from the direction of our house.

Straightening up, I watched as he attempted to sit on the grass, but his legs were too long and he struggled to cross them. With a hearty chuckle, he stretched them out, slightly bent, and leaned on his hands.

"I'm getting too old for this, ladies," he said humorously, making Wanda and I smile.

"What d'you need, dad?" I asked, raising my brows.

"I just wanted to check in and see if you were ready for tonight," he said casually, making me furrow my brows. He seemed to notice my confusion, prompting, "Tonight? Your cousin's birthday party?"

"My cousin's what-now?"

He sighed, massaging the point between his brows. "Y/C/N? They organised this months ago. We're all expected to be there." His glanced to Wanda. "You, too, dear."

Wanda hummed, pulling her gaze from her painting and looking to my dad. "Yes, I'm aware. Got my dress ready and everything."

My eyes snapped to Wanda's with surprise. "You knew about this?!"

"You should be more like her," my dad muttered, as Wanda smiled with a hint of mischief in her eyes.

I looked back to my father. "I was planning on helping Y/B/N with his manuscript tonight."

My dad waved his hand. "I've already talked to him. He's agreed to work on it before the party starts so you're both on time."

I groaned, already tired at the sound of yet another party. Did it ever end?

"Don't be late," he ordered, though his voice was anything but stern. Cue another groan. He smiled before looking to Wanda's painting. "Wow, that's great, dear. Apparently you've got Y/N here attempting to do the same?"

Wanda chuckled as she handed him my several failed attempts. "Key word being 'attempting'."

He accepted the pages and stifled a smile of amusement. "Wow... maybe you should stick to writing, Y/N."

I ripped the pages from his grasp. "Cheers, dad, really."

He laughed before leaning forward and kissing my forehead. "It's all in good faith, dear. Now remember. Don't be late tonight, okay?"

I sighed, which he took as my response, before pushing himself off the grass with a grumble. Dusting his trousers, he nodded to Wanda and I before leaving us be.

"You could've told me I had yet another party to attend tonight," I told Wanda with narrowed eyes.

She shrugged, smiling helplessly. "I thought you knew."

I laid back on the grass with a dramatic sigh. "I just don't understand why our life revolves around extravagant parties, balls and dinners."

"That's just how it is, moya lyubov' (my love)," she said with a warm smile.

I looked up at the sky, raising my hand to shield the sun from my eyes, though my heart fluttered at one of the many nicknames she called me in Russian. "I'd rather live in the middle of nowhere. Where nobody expects anything of me and there's no stupid parties to attend."

She rested a hand on my leg before laying beside me, leaning her head on my shoulder. I relaxed my head on hers, appreciating how well we fit together.

"Same here," she agreed, making me gasp playfully.

"What? Don't you love the glitz and glamour?"

She laughed quietly. "I do, but I like the peace and quiet more."

I breathed out, fingertips brushing hers. "Maybe I can be a little late tonight... accidentally run over time so I don't have to stay as long."

Her fingers tugged on mine between us as a warning. "No. I'll be left alone and I'll be bored. And when I'm bored, I drink."

It was my turn to laugh. "You won't be alone, Wanda. You'll have Pietro."

She shifted so she was no longer leaning on my shoulder but instead tilting her head to look my way. "I want you."

I turned my head and gave her a small, promising smile. "I'll try to be on time."

She quirked a brow. "Try? You will."

My eyes flittered away, ready to argue otherwise, but she sat up and grabbed her paintbrush. I sat up, too, ready to tell her I would try, but I flinched when she flicked water towards me from the tip of it.

"Are you serious?" I asked, wiping the water from my eyelids with tongue-in-cheek.

She chuckled and I grabbed my paintbrush and did the same, watching her squirm when it flicked on her face.

Suppressed smile on her face, she wiped away the water and glared with dazzling eyes. "You shouldn't start what you can't finish, milaya (darling)."

Smiling from ear to ear, I quirked a brow devilishly. "Oh?"

"You're so lucky we're in front of people," she said lowly, leaning close enough to be platonic, but her hand slipped under my dress and creeped up my leg, making me involuntarily shiver. "Or you would be in serious trouble."

I stopped her hand from going any higher, the rings on her fingers cold enough for me to not melt under her touch. "I highly doubt that, love."

She held my gaze, intoxicating and mesmerising all at once. A sly smile tugged at her lips as she said, "Don't test me then. You heard your father. Don't be late."

I exhaled, licking my lips. "Fine. I won't be."

—

Later that afternoon, I found myself sat in my brother's study as the two of us worked on his latest manuscript together. It was a love story, his (my) specialty, and I was helping him to sort out his sentence structure when he decided to question me.

"Will you entertain me for a moment?" he asked randomly, making me look up from the pages.

"I'll probably regret it, but go on," I said jokingly, before looking back down and adding some notes to the paper.

His chair creaked as he leaned back, eyes watching me thoughtfully. "Are you in a secret relationship?"

I almost choked on my spit as he asked this, heart dropping to my stomach with panic. He couldn't know about Wanda, right? We'd been so careful.

Thankfully, I played it off well as I merely glanced his way before distracting myself with note-taking.

"Why would you think that, Y/B/N?" I asked like he was insane.

He shrugged in my peripheral. "I don't know... I've been wondering for a while. You've just loosened up so much more. And you're not as uptight as you usually are."

"Cheers," I said sarcastically.

He leaned forward, head resting in his palm. "This all happened right about the time I met Wanda..."

I swallowed hard, quirking a brow at him to play down my panic.

"I saw you with Pietro the other week," he continued, and I could finally breathe when I realised what he was insinuating. "I'm happy if you're happy, Y/N, but I'm not a fan of you sleeping with my publisher."

At that thought, I shuddered and proceeded to shove Y/B/N on the arm. "Don't say that. And I would never."

Just your fiancé, I thought guiltily.

"Good," he said with relief, straightening up. "Because you're not supposed to do that until you get married."

I rolled my eyes dismissively in response, but wondered if that still applied in a world where one was not allowed to marry the person they loved.

Y/B/N gave me a reassuring glance. "Look, I'm okay with it, I guess. But I'd appreciate the heads up so I can give him a stern talking to."

Realising there was a hint of mirth in his voice, I looked up and gave him a warning look. "Don't you dare."

He laughed, patting me on the back, to which I shrugged off with annoyance.

"It's the Maximoff charm," he commented knowingly. "The twins have that effect on people, don't they? Wanda sure has it on me."

A short silence fell after he said that and I chewed on my lip curiously, unable to stop myself from speaking until it was too late.

"Is her love reciprocated?"

He looked down to me from his daydream, no doubt of Wanda. "Pardon?"

Knowing there was no backing down from the conversation now, I avoided his eyes. "The engagement between you both was arranged... you're clearly in love with her, but is it returned?"

His lips twitched into a frown. "I'd hope so."

I hummed, diverting my attention away from him and to the pen in my hand.

"Why? Did she say something?" he asked, voice laden with worry.

"Of course not," I reassured him.

"But you'd tell me if she did?" he asked eagerly.

I looked his way and saw him peering down at me, hanging onto my response. I nodded lamely, which seemed to put him at ease as he sank into his chair with relief.

We spent the next few hours working on the manuscript without a hitch, but I noticed the time and realised the party was already in full swing. Wanda's words came to mind and I hoped she wouldn't be too annoyed at my lateness.

"We're wrapping it up now, don't worry," Y/B/N said, noticing me check the clock. "Thanks for the help. I'm gonna get this to my editor tomorrow. Your amendments should help make the process go a lot smoothly."

I hummed in response, feeling a heaviness settle on my shoulders as he mentioned his editor. It was always the same routine – I helped him with his manuscript, he got it edited, got his book published and got all the credit. And I was stuck in the same position, wishing I could do the same.

"What is it?" he asked with a sigh, sensing my mood.

Playing with the corner of the manuscript, I met his gaze. "I help you with your writing, but I never get anything from it."

"You get to help me," he pointed out, not seeing the issue. "Isn't that enough?"

Pietro's offer came to mind as I said, "What if I wrote my own book? And got published with my name on the cover?"

He squinted as he studied me, trying to find the humour in my words. Letting out a laugh, he shook his head.

"Y/N, that's absurd."

I raised my eyebrows hopefully. "I mean, is it? Would that be so bad?"

He pressed his lips together and breathed out through his nose. Resting a hand on my shoulder, he gave me a condescending look.

"I'm saying this because I care," he said, making me feel like crap. "But yes."

As if I didn't already know the answer, I asked, "Why?"

He motioned with his hand like it was obvious. "Because. People would look at you differently. You'd be undesirable. You know men don't like smart women. I'm just looking out for you as your brother."

I looked away, the bitterness at his words stinging more than usual. "Well, I like smart women."

Thinking I was joking, he chuckled. "Don't go saying things like that. One might misinterpret."

My teeth pressed into my lower lip hard, trying to contain my frustration.

"You can do this every now and then," he said, referring to the manuscript, "but any more isn't possible. Besides, two authors in one family? That's insane."

I forced a smile, but I wondered if his last comment was the real reason he wouldn't let me at least try to get published.

"Anyway, never mind that," he said indifferently. "We should probably head out. Dad is not going to be pleased. Especially since I promised we wouldn't be late."

I nodded, sliding my chair out and wanting to be anywhere but here right now. "Yeah, come on."

He gave me a sneaky smile. "Can't wait to see Pietro?"

I slapped him on the arm before standing up, ignoring his laughter. Nothing to make an already-depressing night worse than going to a party you didn't care for.

—

Wanda Maximoff was a very difficult drunk to be around, I'd learnt that the hard way.

As soon as Y/B/N and I rolled up to my cousin's house, a third of the guests were drunk and the rest were tipsy. A typical Y/L/N get-together. Y/B/N was instantly dragged away by some family whilst I was quick to make myself scarce, attempting to find Wanda. But the place was bustling with people and there were way too many rooms to check.

I found Pietro before I found his twin, as he was poking around party favours on a table in the corner, attempting to make out what were in the bags.

"If you're expecting a brand new fountain pen, you won't find it in there," I teased, making him jump.

He sighed when he looked my way, realising it was me. "I know that. But there's nothing better here to do, so I may as well know what freebies we'll be getting by the end of it."

I smirked. "Anything good?"

He shrugged, seeming disappointed. "Just some chocolate and perfume samples."

Holding back a smile, I said, "How tragic."

"If you're looking for my sister, she's over there," he said, nodding behind me. "You'll love this one."

"What do you mean?" I asked, brows knitted with confusion, before turning around and following his gaze.

Wanda was indeed stood on the other side of the dining room and I could just about make her out between idle guests. She was chatting to some woman, hands moving erratically and with expression, a grin on her lips.

"What is she doing?" I asked unsurely, tearing my eyes from her and looking to Pietro.

He was withholding laughter as he answered, "Sometimes, dear Y/N, my beloved twin sister gets drunk when she's–"

"Bored," I finished, remembering what she told me this morning. My face dropped as I mumbled, "Uh-oh."

"Uh-oh indeed," Pietro said, grinning at his sister's dismay. "Drunk Wanda is a very truthful Wanda. So, any secrets of hers will most definitely be revealed tonight."

Pietro was too caught up in his own amusement to notice my eyes widening.

"One of our servants made me a platter a few years ago," Pietro explained, oblivious to my panic. "It was a delicious cheese platter, the cheese having been imported from France. Then, Wanda proceeded to eat it without telling me. When I asked if she did, she lied. And I only discovered she lied because she got drunk a few weeks later and bragged about how good the cheese was."

Continuing to ramble, though this time in Russian, Pietro complained about said incident, though I wasn't listening as I watched Wanda talk to the woman enthusiastically. I could only imagine what secrets she was sharing.

"Pietro!" I cut him off, earning his attention. "Shouldn't you do something? To stop Wanda?"

The cheese platter story long forgotten, his grin reappeared on his lips. "Nah, it's funny watching her make a fool of herself."

I gave him a look of disbelief before looking back to Wanda, who was laughing at something by herself. The woman she was speaking to seemed partially confused, but smiled to be polite. I gulped, before shaking my head.

"I'm not that mean," I said to Pietro before making a move to stop her.

Pietro booed me playfully, but I ignored him and approached the drunk brunette, managing to catch her conversation.

"–and they're usually such catty bitch–"

"Wanda!" I immediately cut her off, bumping into her side slightly to get her attention. "There you are!"

Green eyes widened with excitement as they met mine. "Y/N! You're here!"

Ignoring her, I wrapped an arm around her shoulder and tugged her close before looking to the guest she was talking with.

"My apologies for her behaviour," I said with an awkward smile, hoping Wanda hadn't revealed anything suspicious.

"No need to apologise, dear," the woman said with an amused smile. "Wanda here was telling me all about how lovely of a sister-in-law you are. Or will be."

Wanda grinned, looking to me and leaning in so close that her nose brushed my cheek. "Yeah, she is," she continued to the woman, though her eyes were on mine. "She's sweet, not like other people make out their sister-in-laws to be."

My face was warm as I cleared my throat and smiled once more to the woman. "If you'll excuse Wanda and I."

The woman barely got out a nod before I dragged Wanda away, trying to keep her lips away from my neck (she was also an extremely clingy drunk). Tugging her into the bathroom down the hall, I closed the door behind us and released a breath of relief, grateful for the escape from guests.

"You look very sexy when you're worried," Wanda complimented, stepping forward and smiling dazedly.

"Wanda–"

She placed her hand on my jaw, moving closer so that her lips were grazing mine as she mumbled, "You came late, milaya (darling). But I still love you."

I'd like to say that I had the willpower to push her away and scold her for acting so obvious about us before, but my lips went numb as she captured them between hers. I could taste the alcohol on her lips as she moved them against mine, making me dizzy and forgetting what I was going to say. Her thumb caressed my jaw and I relaxed under her touch, hands resting on her chest. When she tried to part my lips with her tongue, I seemed to come to my senses.

"Wanda, you're drunk," I muttered, pushing her back gently.

She chased down my mouth again, sucking on my lip and tilting my head back so she could have better access. I tried not to let her win as I kissed her briefly before pulling away. Clouded hazel eyes met mine with a matching smirk.

"You're such a tease," she whispered, her accent thicker than usual and making my stomach flip uncontrollably. Her thumb traced my lips as she continued, "You shouldn't do that when I already know how you taste, moya lyubov' (my love)."

The way she was staring at me made me flustered in place, and she seemed to notice her effect on me as she winked my way.

Shaking my head and trying not to let her win, I said, "Look, Wanda. I'm sorry for being late. But did you really have to get drunk?"

She shrugged, leaning her weight on my shoulder with her hand. "If you hadn't kept me waiting, then I wouldn't have."

I sighed, looking to her apologetically. "I didn't realise the time."

A permanent troublesome smile was fixed on her lips as she watched me.

"Your brother told me how you can be when you get drunk," I said with mild concern, hoping she'd register my seriousness. "You need to be careful, Wanda. We can't have people finding out about us."

"It seems to me," she began agonisingly slowly, lacing her arms around my shoulders, "that you'll have to watch me all night to make sure I don't do anything out of line."

Determined not to play into her teasing, I maintained her gaze with a stern stare. "It seems I'll have to."

She bit her lip, eyes flickering between mine, before leaning further into my ear. In a whispered voice, she said, "That means you can't leave my side, printsessa (princess)."

I clenched my jaw, ready to agree, but a gasp escaped my lips as hers sucked on my earlobe, teeth nibbling on the sensitive skin. Stupid Wanda and her stupid flirting and stupid attractiveness.

"Wanda!" I scolded, though my cheeks were flushed as I pushed her away gently.

She laughed adorably, the sound making my heart skip a beat. "What?"

"You have to behave," I told her, swallowing hard and trying not to let her teasing smile get to me. "You can't do this out there. Okay?"

"Okay," she agreed in a way that wasn't reassuring in the slightest.

I rolled my eyes before grabbing her hand and leading her back outside the bathroom, returning to the party. I wasn't planning on leaving her side for the rest of the evening, even if Y/B/N wanted to be with her. The last thing I wanted was for her cute drunken self to reveal something she couldn't take back.

To my relief, she kind of behaved after that. There were times when she would get a little too touchy to be platonic, but a quick stare set her straight. Y/B/N wasn't around much, as when he did join us, he was immediately pulled away by some family friends who wanted to discuss his books. For once, I was glad he was an author, afraid of what would happen if Wanda got too comfortable in his presence.

At one point though, he was able to join Wanda, Pietro and I at a standing table, relief flooding his expression when nobody called after him. His arm wrapped around Wanda's waist and he kissed the top of her head, making me look the other way with distaste. She scrunched her nose up at the action before distracting herself with a drink. I gave her a knowing look, having told her earlier to stop with the alcohol. She pretended not to see me.

"Sorry I've not been able to spend time with you tonight," he said to Wanda, oblivious to her tipsy state.

"It's almost like it's your birthday and not your cousin's," Pietro joked, smiling at him.

My brother chuckled. "I guess. They just all wanna talk about my manuscript."

"Ah, yes, the reason you were late, right?" Wanda asked, eyes falling to mine.

"I'm sorry," my brother apologised, assuming it was him she was speaking to.

"You were helping him, too, right?" Pietro asked, looking to me curiously. "Maybe I'll finally get a glance at your work."

I narrowed my eyes at him, having figured he'd put the subject to rest after last time. He merely grinned in response, finding joy in messing with me, just like his sister. Before I could say anything, my brother beat me to it.

"Don't be getting any ideas. It's just a hobby." He smiled forcefully, before glancing at me. "Isn't it, Y/N?"

So he was jealous. Wow.

"You don't need to hide your relationship, y'know," he continued when I didn't respond, looking to Pietro.

The silver-haired publisher choked on his drink as he looked to my brother, clearly very amused.

"I know you're together," Y/B/N said with agitation. "Everybody does. And don't get me wrong, Pietro, I respect you as a publisher."

I groaned quietly, closing my eyes with embarrassment. When I opened them, Pietro was watching my brother with an entertained smile, meanwhile, Wanda was looking between them with a twitching frown.

"But if you're going to date my sister, you should do it the right way," my brother continued stupidly. "It's not appropriate to have whatever this is." He motioned between us with his hands. "It's wrong."

I jumped when Wanda's hand slipped to my arse, squeezing it gently. Thankfully, our backs were to a wall so nobody would have noticed behind us, but I instantly glared at her and removed her hand. She gave me a cunning smile, not bothered by the consequences.

"...and if you're sleeping together like I suspect," Y/B/N was saying, making me flush with humiliation, "know that our friendship is at breaking point. I can't have that blatant disrespect in my life."

Wanda continued to attempt to grab my arse, making me slap her hand away several times, all whilst trying to manage whatever conversation was happening right now.

"I can't believe you just said that," I finally spoke up, managing to keep Wanda at bay long enough. "You're such an idiot, Y/B/N! I told you I wasn't with Pietro!"

Pietro tried not to laugh as he met my brother's intimidating stare. "I value our friendship, too, Y/B/N. Which is why I can promise you I have no... relations... with your sister. I don't like her like that, I can assure you."

Wanda snorted with amusement, before hiding behind a glass of wine when everyone looked her way.

Y/B/N seemed embarrassed as he cleared his throat. "Oh."

I rolled my eyes. "Yes, oh!"

"I guess I should apologise," he said awkwardly, looking to Pietro. "I–"

"No apology necessary," Pietro cut him off, raising a hand. "I am thankful for the entertainment however."

"I'm gonna go literally anywhere else," I dismissed myself, unable to take the uncomfortable situation any longer.

Without waiting for a response, I turned on my heel and walked away. To my surprise, Wanda trailed after, falling into step with me.

I glanced at her unhappily, quirking a brow. "Can I help you?"

"Oh, don't be mad at me because your brother's an idiot," she said with a wag of her hand.

I gave her a suggestive look. "I told you to behave."

She pressed her lips together in a sheepish smile. "I'm sorry... Y/B/N was talking about you and Pietro and I– well, I don't like sharing, remember?"

The improper glint in her eye as she stopped before me, watching with amusement, made me feel warm all of a sudden. That day when she first told me that and we proceeded to make love flashed to mind, and she seemed to know as she had a mischievous look on her face.

Clearing my throat, I pointed a finger her way. "Behave."

I should have known by the devilish look in her eyes that she wouldn't.

#wanda maximoff au #wanda maximoff x you #wanda maximoff x reader #wanda maximoff #elizabeth olsen x you #elizabeth olsen x reader #elizabeth olsen #elizabeth olsen imagine #marvel #mcu #scarlet witch #scarlet witch imagine

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besotted-eros · 3 years

Text

Visit from a Ghost

Eren x Fem!Reader

Content: Angst, smut, unprotected sex, oral (f! receiving), pining, overstim, dirty talk, slight blood, bruising, established relationship, canon compliant

A/N: so this is a companion piece to my obsessed! Eren headcanons and fic. References to manga spoilers, heavy on the angsty sex. Very self indulgent. Hope you enjoy!

When you saw the figure at your bedroom window, lounging upon the sill as though he was meant to be there, you drew your gun.

It was a small, angry thing, wrestled from the grasps of a Marleyan soldier and entrusted to you to help protect the queen. You had yet to use it, but levelled it naturally now, letting out a growled command for the shadowed being to raise his hands.

When you saw the figure turn from your bedroom window, lazily leaning his head back so his viridian gaze met yours, you dropped your gun.

It hit the floorboards with a metallic thud, and in a better context you would have held your breath, jumped away from the risk of a bullet discharging from the fall. But you were motionless, staring at the apparition in front of you. That was what he felt like. A ghost, conjured from beyond the veil.

"Eren." You said it like one calls to the dead, your voice shaky and unconfident. But brimming, with hope. With fear.

"I come all this way to see you, and your first reaction is to shoot me?" He murmured, his rich voice creeping through the dark to find the holes in your heart.

Moth bitten, hung up in a closet and forgotten, you had lost the memory of the pain and euphoria that Eren brought you. But you could feel it now, searing your chest.

"You deserve worse. Months. It's been months." The words tumbled from your throat as you fought the urge to cry. "I didn't know where you were. For months. And they won't tell me what what happened, no one will." You felt like a child, choking on your words as your hands bunched into fists. The only thing you knew is that you were meant to raise the alarm as soon as you saw him. But you couldn't. Not for him. You wanted to fall to your knees, to see how he'd rush across the room to gather you in his arms.

"You don't want me to answer that truthfully." He moved from the windowsill, feet silently hitting the ground as he faced you completely.

You didn't recognize him. Those were the eyes of your lover, those the lips you kissed, the brow you rested yours upon. The man who was once the boy you slept beside, you fought beside, you grew beside. The face you had seen overcome with passion, with pain and glory. But he was stoic, as grey as the three walls. You had felt him slipping before Marley, but now?

Even though he was in the same room, breathing your air, he felt gone.

"I do. I know you're the one who pushed me onto this duty, you made Hisu call for me, and for what? To keep me stupid and ignorant?" You spat the words at his feet, and it made him bristle.

"To protect you, why else? This stupid farm house is the safest place on the island. Safer than any of the walls, or the inner castle, or-"

"Safer than with you?"

That touched him. The repetition of his vow, that as long as you were by his side you would come to no harm. That he would hold you with his heart and protect you with his life. As long as you stayed within reach of him.

"Yes. Safer than with me. So much safer." He didn't want that to be true. He wanted to be where you belonged.

But he needed to make the world safe for you.

"I needed to make sure you were taken care of, that I could do the things I was meant to do without risking you." He crossed his arms in front of his body, and the tone of his voice bordered on petulant. But despite his stoic face, you could tell he was nervous. The clench of his jaw, how his eyes looked past you instead of at you. This wasn't a man who had forgone emotions. Just a mask.

Maybe that was your Eren after all.

"I know you hate me-"

"I don't hate you." You cut him off sharply, reaching up to touch the pendant at your throat. It was a piece of sea glass, tumbled by the waves to the colour of his eyes. You had picked it up on a beach patrol, and told him how it matched him perfectly. He had stolen it out of your pocket that night and fashioned a cage with stolen wire. The next morning it hung from the leather cord his father's key once did, and found its permanent home upon your neck.

He told you it was his eye and his heart, and to keep watch over it as he kept watch over you.

He had been so gentle. You remembered how the sea breeze rustled the hair, grown to the nape of his neck, how he had given you a smile that had become so rare. He had known then that the boat would be returning without him.

"I don't hate you even if I want to. I never could. I... I miss you." The dam in your throat broke as you hiccuped a single sob. And the dam in his face broke, eyebrows upturned with remorse.

He had made you cry.

"No, no, no." He murmured, crossing the floor to take you in his arms. He was taller, his body somehow even more wiry than when he had left. Toughened by hardship. But the way his fingers curled around the back of your head, the way his arm wrapped around your waist. That was how he held you. How he always had. The familiarity made you weak, and you clung to him desperately, fists mangling the fabric of his shirt as you buried your face against him.

"Y/n." He said it through gritted teeth, and then repeated it. And then again.

You thought back to every time you had embraced after being apart. The sound of his feet pounding the stone of Wall Maria to throw his arms around you, his cries of your name loud enough to send birds flying. How he had whispered your name when you saw him after Shiganshina, his face buried in the crook of your neck and the weight of the world suddenly so much more heavy upon his shoulders.

"Eren." You reached up, taking his face delicately in your hands. His malachite gaze was wide, wild with desperation and hurt. "What happened to you, 'ren?" You asked, and his eyes shut tightly. "What did you do?"

"Please. Don't ask me. I'll answer to God, but I can't answer to you."

You could have pressed. He would have given up, at least... The Eren who loved you a lifetime ago would have. But the darkness in his mouth when he pressed his lips to your forehead convinced you not to.

He had followed you so diligently when you were young. Seeking the peace he had somehow found in you. And as you pulled him towards your lips, you knew it was that same comfort he was searching for. Peace, amongst his life of nothing but war. So you kissed serenity onto his lips, knowing that this may be the last taste of it he would ever have.

He groaned softly against your mouth, still for a moment before pressing into the touch. His fingers were gentle as they brought you closer, and closer still. Tugging at your hips, your shoulders, your hair, coiling around your neck. He was rediscovering you, reminding himself of the map of your body. It was like he was finding his way home again.

"I missed you. I thought about you, so much." He exhaled over your lips, and you tried to keep the welling of your tears from spilling over again. You had needed that. Needed to know that he still breathed for you. "Even when it hurt. I thought about you."

"I thought about you too." You whispered, stroking your hands through his silken hair. "I hoped... I didn't think it was smart, but I hoped. You would come to me."

Your hands traversed his chest and back, running down his shoulders and muscular arms. You grabbed his wrists, feeling the bump of your hair tie still upon it. He lifted for you to see, and you pressed a kiss to his hot skin, unable to hold back the tears anymore. You watered his skin with them.

"See? I kept you with me. Always." his mouth was against your forehead, tendons in his wrist flexing. "I lost a lot of myself. But I never lost you."

You let out a choked whimper and he pressed his cheek to yours, murmuring your name softly. Finally your knees gave out, but his arms were vices around your waist, holding you as you leaned against him. But he came down with you, kneeling with you in the puddle of moonlight. It painted him white and black, his shadows so much deeper but where it graced him, he glowed.

"I'm sorry." You sighed into his shoulder, all but pawing at his back. "I just... Am I dreaming, Eren? Are you going to be gone when my eyes open in the morning?"

He didn't answer for a moment, face buried in your hair. "I'm real. This is real. I promise."

"Prove it." You whispered, turning your mouth to his ear like a bloom to sun. "I've had this nightmare, every night since you've left. Prove this isn't one."

His fingers curled around your upper arms as his eyes bore into yours. They were shadowed, haunted by things you knew you'd never know. "Tell me how. I'll do anything for you."

Almost, you wanted to correct him. He'd do almost anything for you.

"Love me."

"I do." He murmured, voice strained as he moved to cup your face, his thumb stroking across your lips. You parted them, inviting his digit to press against your tongue. His eyes widened slightly, and you saw something spark. It encouraged you to wrap your lips around him, suckling at his first knuckle. You let it pop from your mouth, dragging your tongue from his palm to the pad.

"Show me. Show me the way only you can." You spoke softly against his skin, and he let out a soft groan, from deep deep within his chest.

"Only me?" He whispered hoarsely, hands squeezing the sides of your face. You nodded as best as you could. "You haven't touched another since I've been gone?"

"Of course not. Since that first night, since that first kiss..." You gripped his wrists tightly, voice thick with emotions you couldn't name. "It's only been you, forever just you."

He kissed you like he wanted to consume you. Open mouthed, hot breath, all teeth and clawing fingers. You fell into him, letting him pull you up and push you towards your bed. You fell backwards, welcoming the soft mattress against your back. A stark contrast to his body, all hard lines and firm hands.

Eren's heat was enough to melt you. You didn't realise you had been so cold. Your legs wrapped around him, pulling his warmth further against your core. He grunted softly against your mouth, jutting his hips forward so you could feel how you made him.

Your lips trailed from his, kissing along the sharp line of his jaw, up to his ear. You didn't need to say anything into it, just your breath made him wild. He tore at your shirt, sending buttons flying across the room as the moonlight met your skin. In response you pulled at his, unhooking your legs to push at his pants. You wanted skin, you wanted bare vulnerable touch. You wanted to see the parts of him he kept hidden.

He never scarred. Your hands traced the unmarred landscape of his torso as he flexed underneath you. No matter what horrors his body faced, it would never leave a lasting impression on him. The titan in him assured that.

You wondered if it was the same for love, as your teeth pricked at his skin, making him shiver. You marked him, delicate and light. In the sun it would look like stepping stones, tracing the path of a lovers touch. If it would even last till morning.

But you loved him anyway, even if it was temporary.

"So beautiful." His voice was guttural, hands cupping your breasts after yanking your bra down. Your nipples didn't have time to harden under his thumb before his mouth was upon them, suckling gently. You gripped his chestnut hair in response, letting out a soft whine of pleasure that encouraged him to suck harder. He switched sides, leaving the cold air to caress the wetness at your precipice.

"I can hear your heartbeat" he murmured, pausing for a moment to press himself against your flesh. "It's so fast."

Your nails traced vows on the back of his neck, down his back as far as you could reach. "You make me like this." You whispered, and his teeth sunk into your skin, making your back arch. "You scare me. You turn me on. You make my head dizzy and my st-stomach fill with butterflies." He stripped you as you spoke, pushing down the soft fabric of your pants, then the cotton of your panties. You felt the kiss of the cold night air for a moment, drifting through the window. And then his fingers were upon you, slowly stroking along your aching entrance and your slick lips.

"I make you wet." He murmured against your skin, and you flushed, nodding.

"Yes, you do." You responded, moving your hips along his hand, encouraging him. He obliged happily, digits wet with your desire now sliding into your hole. You had been so long neglected, not feeling the desire to even touch yourself without him there to see. He could feel your tightness, how you gripped his fingers.

"My sweetheart," he purred, lifting his face to gaze up at you. His eyes were heavy lidded, almost hiding the jade irises that haunted your dreams. "You're so tight, spread your legs." You obeyed him as easily as breathing, opening your legs as he began to kiss his way further down. You whined again, and his fingers gripped your thighs, forcefully enough to close them slightly.

"The fucking noises you make..." He hissed, breath hot against your pussy. He dragged a tongue from the bottom, to the very top, glancing off of your clit in a way that made you cry out. "I want you to keep quiet so we don't get caught but..." Another languid lick, another lewd gasp. "I want to make you scream too."

Your hand came down hard on the back of his head, gripping his hair tightly. He groaned against you, sending vibrations through you. You didn't mean to be hard, to have tugged so roughly. But Eren loved it, eyes glinting as he sank his tongue into you, letting your plush walls envelope the muscle eagerly. Each time your hand twitched, responding to the waves of pleasure he drew from you, you'd pull more. And it would drive him forward, tongue sliding across your lips desperately, lips closing around your clit to suckle at it.

Your body was uncontrollable, hips lifting from the bed and chest heaving. At points it felt like he was drinking from you, loud slurps as he thumbed your clit. The movement repeated, becoming faster and faster. The pleasure mounted, a knot tightened where his tongue touched you.

"Do it." He purred against you, feeling how your legs trembled and thighs touched his ears. He knew you, knew what every jerk of your body meant. "On my tongue, want to taste you."

That was what made the bud burst, your hips rocking desperately against him as your pussy fluttered, overcome with its first orgasm in months. It coursed through you, and you felt the bed wet with your love.

Your toes curled with pleasure and you moved onto your elbows, staring down at him.

"Eren," you whimpered, and his eyes opened once more. From your vantage point you could see how his hips moved, thrusting slowly against the mattress. He was as desperate for you as you were for him."Eren I need you. I need you so bad." With a final pop of your clit, one that made you gasp, he pulled back and straightened up. His cock bobbed as he looked at you, eyes filled with a dangerous mixture of love and lust. He was dripping, your wetness from his chin and his pre-cum from his mushroom head.

"How badly?"

You brought your legs to your chest slowly, and his eyes dropped from your face to your heat. Your hole closed around emptiness, so desperate to be filled. "More than anything."

His fist closed around his shaft, stroking slightly as he stared at you with a slack jaw, face softened with awe. He always looked at you as though you hung the moon. As if you were responsible for everything soft and wonderful in the world. You watched as he touched himself and his mouth twisted into a grin.

"Did this..." He whispered, his hand moving faster, the noises filling the room. They were hot, lewd. The hot slick of his skin, your moans rising to meet it. "Did this when I thought of you."

The thought of him, so far away from you, deep in trouble but still overcome by his want, the aching need of you. It was enough to make you gush visibly, and Eren moaned at the sight. Before you had the chance to beg again he was at your entrance, hands pushing on the backs of your thighs. You pulled at him, bringing him to your lips so you could kiss your moans into his mouth.

Because the moment he started pushing, moan you did. Loud and desperate, feeling how he spread you. How he made you stretch to fit him like a glove.

He was mumbling in your ear, alternating between sweet calls of your name and darkened swears. Your nails dragged down his back, digging into his smooth skin and making steam rise. His hips were slow, but only for a moment. The need took over quickly, and you bucked to meet him as best as you could. But he was long, long enough to make you start each time he bottomed out in you.

"Eren, Eren, Eren," you whispered into the dark, each iteration becoming more and more sloppy. He grabbed your face, pulling himself up so he could stare at you. Sweat beaded on his elegant forehead, his long hair slicked back. But his eyes glowed in the lowlight, focusing on your face as though nothing but you existed.

He pounded you in time with your chants, each drill concentrated on getting as much of himself into you as he could. He filled your needy hole like he filled your heart. Wholly, fully. Enough to make your eyes well with tears.

He caught one that trickled down the side of your face, lapping it up with his long tongue. You gasped for air, twisting his hair in your fingers as legs wrapped around him desperately. You wanted to stay like this, stay connected to him forever. His hands traversed you, finding the places he had made home. The curve of your waist, the precipice of your hips, the valley under your ass as he pulled you up further, hitting you now at an angle that dragged across the nub on your inner wall.

And then he lifted you, pulling back to sit on his heels and to suspend you in his arms. You grasped his face as you looked down at him, your hair falling like a curtain. Hiding him from the world, the world that would take him from you. He was beautiful. All wild eyes, soft pouting lips. His fine features were shadowed, his expression twisted with pleasure. You kissed him, once. Twice. Three times. Each time deeper.

Stay here.

You wanted to say as he began to bounce you, sliding you upon his length, fingers digging into the soft plush of your ass.

Stay here, we can be okay.

His mouth was hot on your neck and shoulders, leaving bruises that you worried would outlast him.

Stay here, I can love you safe here.

But all that came out of your mouth was a keening moan, your walls fluttering as you came like a river, washing over him. Your head was thrown back in ecstasy, the wave of euphoria making you tremble and making him growl. He bite your shoulder, drawing soft droplets of blood, and you felt his hips stutter, and the telltale wetness that heralded his own cum. Filling you, as it should. He moaned, vulnerable and wanton into your shoulder.

"That's fucking it, baby. Cream on my cock." He cooed, his pace unrelenting as he fucked you through both of your orgasms. You were relieved when he let you fall back onto the bed, eyes opening to pull in for a kiss.

But he didn't stop.

"Er-eren..." You whimpered, and he kissed you hard, enough to bruise the pulp of your lip.

"Hold on... Hold on to me..." He whispered, teeth dragging across your sensitive flesh. You obliged, throwing your arms around his neck, legs circling him and pulling him in to the hilt. He pulled back, snapping in quickly, his pace sloppy and hurried.

"Need more...need more of you and I..." A gasp, a throb from deep within you. "need to give you all of me."

You were seeing stars. Bursting across your vision like supernovas. Though your limbs clung to him, the pleasure grew almost unbearable. A burning fire twisting between your legs, making you jerk and throb. It's like you could feel him in ways you never could.

The drip of his sweat, watering the forgotten lands of your body. The way his skin soothed yours, healing empty wounds. How his hair shifted, a lock falling to caress your cheek.

And his heartbeat. You felt it. Inside you, beating as though it was your own. The sensation drove you wild, clawing at his shoulders and yanking at his ochre locks.

"Gonna- it's gonna..." You whimpered, unable to form coherence. He drove into you faster, nodding against you. You were reduced to a babbling mess, eyes rolled back, mouth slack.

"Yeah, yeah baby yeah me too. Gonna cum in you again. Take it, take me. Take it all." He said, his voice thick with lust as he clawed into you, the slam of his hips hitting you in the most unimaginable of ways. He reared back suddenly, gripping your face hard enough to hurt as he placed his brow to yours.

"I love you." He whispered.

"I love you too." You replied, and with that you were both over the cliff, bodies shaking with pleasure. He filled you, his hot cum spurting from the slight space between you. His hand slammed against the head board, chest heaving, hips stuttering. But his eyes never left yours, gaze glazed with pleasure. His weight collapsed against you, and you cradled him, murmuring as his lips pressed to yours.

"Say it again." He demanded, hand moving to cup your cheek. "Say you love me."

"I love you." You turned your head to kiss his palm. "I love you, Eren. I love you."

He let out a soft sound, resting his mouth against your cheek. "More." He demanded, rolling over now and pulling you with him. His arms caged you, in a way that made you never want to be free. "I want a lifetimes worth."

"I'll give you a few months." You muttered, and could feel him smile against the top of your head. You wondered when was the last time he did that. When would be the next. "Just to catch you up." His hands stroked through your hair, teasing knots from it. You laid your ear flat to his toned chest. "You'll have to get the rest next time." His hand faltered and then tightened, pushing you into him. You could hear his heart pick up speed.

"Y/n-"

"Don't." You interrupted him. It was sharper than you intended, but you thought you had the right to it. "Don't say a word."

He went silent, resuming his grooming of your locks.

"Tell me we'll see each other again. Even if it's for a moment. Just once more. I don't want this to be it." His hands flattened on your back as he held you.

"I promise." He murmured. "We'll see each other again. But by then you'll hate me."

You didn't argue. Somehow you knew.

"For now, I love you." You pulled yourself to him, kissing his mouth with sweetness. You whispered it, over and over. Like a promise. Like a prayer. You said until your voice was hoarse, curled up on your side as his body surrounded you. You fell asleep with it on your tongue.

And you woke up to an empty bed.

199 notes · View notes

hoodharlow · 3 years

Text

Stuck with Nowhere to Go

El Novio Quarantine Edition: Part 1

AN: This is part one of El Novio week and I'm gonna be posting a new part for this mini series everyday until April 17. Thank you to everyone that has been supporting me and following Cal and Claudia's story. I love y'all so mucha nd hope y'all enjoy this.

Requested?

Warnings: smut, brief quarantine talk, a small arguement. and overall Claudia being h word for Cal

Word Count: 3.1 k

Calum gently pushed Claudia against the mattress, getting in a more comfortable position as they devoured each other. With one hand balancing himself, so he wouldn't squish Claudia, he used the other to unbutton the flannel she wore. He slid his hand inside her shirt and gave her breast soft squeeze before sliding down to her soaked-through panties.

Frustrated with his teasing touches, Claudia tried to roll him onto the mattress. But he wouldn't budge.

"Cal," She whined against his lips, jutting her hips against his to feel some sort of relief.

"Pretty girl, I know, but your parents are across the hall." Calum mumbled before kissing down her neck.

"It's been three weeks. Please," She sighed. "I'll be quiet."

"Fine, but you have to be quiet. For our sake." She eagerly nodded at him before he continued. "I'm only going to eat you out okay?"

"But—"

"Later okay? When we get to our house, you can have your way with me. I promise." He held out his pinky to her.

"Okay." She pouted, wrapping her pinky around his.

Calum sat on his knees and slipped off his shirt. He tossed it to the side before towering over her once more. A giggle escaped Claudia when he sponged kisses all over her face.

Having enough of his teasing, she pulled his lips back to hers. She wrapped her leg over his waist, helping her stay balanced as she grinded herself against him. Claudia was basking in having the upper hand that she didn't feel Calum's fingers slip in her panties.

He skillfully slipped his ring and middle fingers in her, causing her to loudly gasp and stop all her moments.

"What's wrong, pretty girl?" He whispered in her ear, making her whine. “Want these off?” Calum asked her, toying with the waistband of her panties.

“Please.” She nodded eagerly. He gently patted her ass so she could lift her hips up.

Once Calum slipped her panties off, he situated himself in front of her core. “All this for me pretty girl?” Calum asked. He placed soft kisses on the insides of her thighs. She squirmed at the feeling of his lips. They got closer and closer to where she needed him the most.

She let out an inaudible gasp of pleasure when Calum licked her. She tried closing her legs, but Calum’s grip on them kept her in place. He softly moaned at her taste and savored her, taking his time with his tongue. He pushed one of her legs to her chest, giving him better access to her.

He inserted another while he pressed his thumb on her clit. Claudia felt something build up in her. She felt pleasantly overwhelmed with Calum’s fingers and tongue. Calum felt it too. He sped up his fingers and circled his thumb on her clit roughly.

She moaned out, not caring who heard her, but he grabbed a pillow and covered her face. Calum lapped up her release. He dropped her legs down and laid next to her.

“Happy album release day,” Claudia whispered excitedly after catching her breath.

He grumbled his response, making her giggle. He rolled to his side and traced his thumb under her bottom lip, giving her a quick peck. He got up to the bathroom to finish himself off, but Claudia had other ideas.

“No, let me,” Claudia said. She sat up and pulled him back by the waistband of his boxers. She brightly up at him, with a mischievous glint in her eyes. “Se me antoja un chorizo.”

“The kitchen is downstairs, Claudia.” He told her prying her hands off him.

“Cal, please let me suck your dick.” She fake cried.

“No, go get ready. We were supposed to be on the road by now. But someone doesn’t know how to keep her hands to herself.” He said before closing her bathroom door. He popped his head out once more. “You better be ready when I’m done.”

***

Calum watched Claudia skip down the steps of Ashton's house when it finally hit him. The last he saw her wear the dress she currently wore was when they went to Coachella the year before. It was probably his favorite dress on her, even if he's only seen her in it once.

"That's the last of them." Claudia said sliding onto the passenger seat. She has baked 'CALM' cakes for the guys in their favorite flavors along with sugar cookies shaped in their initials and in their instruments.

She took off her mask and reached for her now watered down iced coffee. She made a face and set it down in the cup holder. "This is nasty. I fucking hate almondmilk." she mumbled before taking another sip.

"Why are you still drinking it?"

"I have to finish it. It was like five bucks."

Calum shook his head, hiding his smile. He reached for his army green Hydro Flask and took a long sip of water. He capped it and started the car. Pulling the car into reverse, he gripped Claudia's head rest a little tighter as he felt her gaze on him. As he got out of the spot, he watched Claudia shift around in her seat.

"You really have a parallel parking kink." Calum laughed as they left Ashton's neighborhood.

"I do not." Claudia scoffed, crossing her arms.

"Keep telling yourself that. Your tits don't lie." He said, pinching one of her nipples. She smacked his hand away as he checked that there weren't any cars before turning into the main road.

"The AC isn't even on so can't say you're cold."

"Whatever."

Calum shook his head and drove to the nearest Target. When they got there, Claudia grabbed a homemade disinfectant wipe from her bag and cleaned their cart. They went straight to the electronics section so Calum could get a record player for the live stream later in the evening. The needle broke in the one he had and since Ashton demanded that they play the album in vinyls, he had to get a new record player.

Claudia took the cart after he placed the record player in the shopping cart. She still felt awkward shopping for pads in front of him. They agreed to meet in the alcohol aisle after she hopefully found some pads. Tampons weren't an option. Pandemic or not, the only thing she was having inside of her was Calum.

“They may not have toilet paper but least they have White Claws.” Calum told Claudia as two boxes, one of only black cherry flavor and the other variety pack because Claudia only drank tangerine flavor.

"I managed to get one thing of pads, so it's something." She told him, covering the pads with the other groceries. "I'm just lucky my period ended last week. I have a month to worry about getting more. You have dog food right? Because there's none in the aisles."

"Yeah, bought some when we got back from Medelyn's baby shower, water and toilet paper too." He nodded his head over to the shopping cart. "Is that everything? And what your parents needed too?"

Claudia looked over their shopping cart. It wasn't much but it was enough since the stores set limits on how much to buy because of the lack of ability to restock.

"I think we're good. If we need something we can drive back and steal from Ashton's garden." she joked.

While they waited in line, Claudia thought about how quick her life changed in less than two weeks. Her landlord practically kicked her, Dulce and Sara out and wanted them out by the time spring break started because of mandatory stay at home orders. She was lucky though. Calum took her in and for the meantime she was going to live with him. Though just last week Diego told her to come home. It took her a lot of convincing, but Calum ended up going with her too.

"Your total is $132.76." the cashier told them.

Claudia was barely pulling out her card as Calum scanned his phone in front of the pin pad. He thanked them and nodded Claudia to keep up.

"We agreed that I was going to pay groceries since you don't let me pay for anything else." She told him as he put the groceries in his car.

"I didn't agree to shit." He furrowed an eyebrow.

"Yuh-huh you nodded and waved me off."

He stayed silent, trying to remember if he did. Then it hit him. "Was it when we ordered Mikko's? Because I thought you meant you were paying for that."

"Of course you did, your cheap ass doesn't pay for sushi." she mumbled to herself. "Well I'm paying for groceries from now on."

"I don't like it when you spend money for us when I can pay for them. Especially now that we're both basically jobless. You need that money for school, Claudia." Calum said as they pulled up to the In-N-Out drive thru across the street from Target.

"And I don't like you paying for things that I can afford too." She argued back, but Calum ignored her since he was ordering their lunch.

He had his card ready to pay so there was no way that he was going to let her pay. When he reached the window the computer crashed and they were only accepting cash. Claudia pulled out a twenty, knowing that Calum never carries cash on him unless they're outside of California. He begrudgingly took it and gave it to the cashier.

***

Claudia considered herself a patient person. An elderly person taking their time in front of the ATM, no problem. Her getting cut in line at Starbucks because she was answering a text from Calum and not paying attention to the line, not an issue. Where she did lose her patience was when she would get stuck in traffic.

“The San Ysidro border is faster than this.” Claudia groaned, dropping in her seat after poking her head out of the sun roof.

“Well we would have avoided traffic if someone didn’t need to go back our place to get a fucking coloring book.” Calum muttered under his breath.

He had enough of her complaining. Ever since he got on the I5, that’s all she’s been doing. They’ve been stuck for over four hours and it was just her mumbling over and over how she would rather be waiting to cross the border than be stuck in the freeway. Even Claudia during her period was less irritable than this. Before she could get a word in, he turned up the volume on the true crime podcast they were listening to.

Ironically it was about a couple where the girlfriend murdered her boyfriend and disposed of his body by a lake in the very same freeway they were on.

Calum glanced over to Claudia. She was curled up, leaning against the window playing tetris on her phone. He rotated his neck and hands in hopes that he loosened up, but nothing worked. He knew he shouldn't have said that to her. It wasn't her fault that there was traffic.

"Cal…" Claudia said quietly, reaching down to lower the volume.

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry. I shouldn't be getting all irritated when I was the one who suggested that you take me back to your house. Because of me we're stuck in traffic and—"

"Claudia, you have nothing to apologize for. You're not the one who caused the traffic. If someone should be apologizing, it should be me. I'm just stressed out because of the album dropping tonight and I'm taking my nerves out on you. So I'm sorry for being a fucking cunt."

"Apology accepted." she giggled.

Claudia leaned over the center console and kissed his cheek. Slowly, she descended down to his neck And sucked under his jaw, making him jerk the car.

"Ashton needs me alive for at least tonight." Calum said, gently prying her off of him. He adjusted his shorts and looked toward the road.

Not even five minutes later, Claudia was toying with a loose string on Calum's shorts. Her hand occasionally bumped into his crotch. Wordlessly she unbuckled her seatbelt and tried reaching for her purse in the backseat. It gave Calum a great view of the nude lace panties she wore.

Before he tried anything, she sat back down and pulled out some nail clippers. Claudia bent over the center console once more and clipped the string with them. She rubbed his thigh and laid her head in the console. Her fingertips deftly smoothed down his leg hairs.

"What are your thoughts on road head?" Claudia asked. She tiptoed her fingers up his thigh, slowly inching to semi hard on.

"I don't know, never thought about it." He answered her, swallowing hard with his gaze glued on the road.

"Really? Like you never thought of me choking on your dick while you're driving?" She pushed herself up from the console and sat criss-cross applesauce. "I have. The thought of you guiding my mouth over your dick surrounded by other cars, clueless to what we're doing. All I have to say is thank fuck for your tinted windows."

He watched from the corner of his eye. She had pulled down her dress, exposing her breasts and her panties were on the dash. One of her hands disappeared under her dress while the other was tweaking her nipples. She whimpered Calum's name loudly as her fingers sped up.

Calum pulled her hand away and licked her fingers cleaned. He slipped his and continued where she left off. With one hand on the steering wheel he brought her to her orgasm. Her hips chased his fingers as he stopped thrusting them in her and only rubbed her clit. Once her high relaxed, he slipped his fingers out of her and licked them.

He pumped a quarter size amount of hand sanitizer in his hand, cleaning his hands, and kept driving.

He looked over to Claudia and smirked. "Thank fuck for tinted windows, huh Claudia."

***

Claudia was bundled up in her room so she wouldn’t disrupt Calum during the livestream. She went downstairs to get her water and a snack after hearing 'Not in the Same Way.' She bumped into Calum in the kitchen, who was getting another White Claw.

"Hey," she said kissing his cheek.

"Miss you." Calum said in between kisses.

Before she said anything, Michael's yelling that he was a pickle echoed through the kitchen. Calum gave her a look and went back to the living room. Duke tried getting on the couch but failed.

"I leave for a fucking second and you're a fucking pickle." Calum said, trying his best not to laugh.

He picked up Duke and sat him in his lap. Panchito wandered over and hopped on the couch and used Duke's bed as a pillow.

"Uh… this is Panchito. He's the Santos' family dog." Calum said introducing the blue heeler puppy to the 40 thousand people watching. "He's about four months old and just sleeps all day with Duke."

The livestream went on until Michael's phone died and Calum continued with Luke. But just before Michael signed off, he thanked Claudia for making the CALM cakes and cookies. Calum struggled a bit to get Luke connected, but he managed once Claudia hopped in and showed him how. He gave her a sheepish thank you and watched her curl up on the opposite end of the couch.

At some point during Calum and Luke's segment, they strayed off their music and discussed cake flavors. When Claudia heard Luke say that he's not a big fan of red velvet cake, she bit back her comment about Luke eating a few slices of red velvet cake at Calum's birthday party the year before. If Claudia knew how to do one thing, that's bake a good red velvet cake.

By the time Calum finished the livestream and his phone call with Luke, Claudia had fallen asleep. He signaled the dogs to follow him outside so they can do their nightly business before going to bed. He guided them back to their respective kennels and secured the doors, so they couldn't escape to go ruin Soni's plants.

"Claudia," Calum said softly. He gently nudged her awake. "Let's go upstairs."

"Fuck, did I fall asleep?" she asked, rubbing her eyes.

"Yeah, surprisingly since you took about four naps today." he teased her.

"Oh shush." she grumbled, folding the blanket she covered herself with.

They quietly went to the guest room where Calum was sleeping to watch a movie. Not even fifteen minutes into the movie, Claudia and Calum were devouring each other. Her hand lazily stroked his length through his sweats as Calum's hands ran over her thighs and ass.

"We should get on the floor, the bed squeaks too much." Claudia said when pulled away from Calum to take off her hoodie.

She got off from the bed and grabbed a duvet from the closet and laid it on the floor. She grabbed some of the decorative pillows and arranged them neatly so they could lay on them. Calum followed suit and shedded off his sweater and sweatpants. He laid back on the duvet and took in Claudia. She sat in his lap in nothing but a light grey bralette and matching panties she got at Aerie. It wasn't an overall sexy set, but it still sent him spiralling.

She leaned down and captured Calum's lips with hers. He let out an incoherent grumble as Claudia rocked her hips against his cock. He slowly inched his hands up her thighs, feeling his way around until he found her ass. He roughly gripped her ass and began guiding her along his clothed cock.

“Can you fucking wait?” Claudia giggled, pulling away from his lips. She sat back up on his lap and took off her bralette. “I wanna take care of you.”

“I don’t want you to.” He said.

“You better remember that the next time you get a stomach ache for eating too many chilaquiles.”

Claudia drummed his chest and got up from the floor. She reached for Calum’s hoodie and tied her hair in a bun.

“Where are you going?” Calum asked her confused.

“You don’t want my help, so I don’t see what I’m doing here.” She shrugged.

She grabbed her phone from the nightstand and gave him a small salute before leaving his room. She waited outside, knowing he was going to go after her. A few seconds later he opened the door and pulled her inside.

“I’m kidding, I need you.” Calum said peppering kisses all over her face.

“That’s what I thought.” She said, triumphantly. She got down on her knees and tugged down Calum’s sweats. She licked her lips and looked up at him. “Now let me show you how proud I am of your album.”

“What would you rank it?”

“Definitely one of your top four.”

Taglist: @f-mu @another-lonely-heart @sunshinebabycal-deactivated2021 @calumscalm @karajaynetoday @cherryxwildflower @myloverboyash @idontneedanyone @findingliam-o @5-secondsofcolor @spicylftv @sexgodashton @fckingpernico @2fangirl4u @calpops

#calum hood smut #calum hood imagine #calum hood fanfic #calum hood one shot #calum hood fluff #calum hood imagines #el novio series #el novio quarantine edition

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chosonore · 3 years

Text

part one | oblivion

oblivion [noun. the state of being unaware or unconscious of what is happening around one]

pairing: kamo noritoshi/f!reader

summary: your relationship with noritoshi was like a game of cat and mouse; no matter how hard you tried to escape from him, he would always find his way back to you.

wordcount: 3.9k

content/warnings: friends to enemies to lovers, language, noritoshi is kind of a dick but i promise it gets better so please don’t lose faith in him, we’re not strictly following the manga timeline bc while i am reading it, i do have a goldfish brain, lowercase intended

a/n: hello, here’s the first installment of my sanguine series! it’s the prequel of this drabble (nsfw) i wrote the other week while i was working on the outline of the fic. it’s a little slow burn because i wanted to spend some more time exploring their relationship and the groundwork for it, so yeah. i’ll try to update it regularly, but since i’ve only planned five parts for sanguine, it might take a while bc i want to take my time with it. if you want to stay updated with the series, i’ll post the masterlist to it shortly! i do hope you enjoy it though :) and stay safe, everybody! [tagging @sukirichi the sukuna to my yuuji, who just gets spammed when i start rambling about my aus but always screams with me (´• ω •`)]

masterlist - next

"y/n!" you look up to see miwa storming towards you, thrusting a book in your direction. "could you- could you please give this to noritoshi? i borrowed this book from him like a week ago and if i don't return this anytime soon, i think he's gonna kill me."

scowling at her, you look at the book in disdain. you wanted to avoid crossing paths with noritoshi as much as possible and miwa was well aware that you didn't like hi-

"please," miwa pleaded again, taking your hands and placing the book in it. "i'm really scared of him. he always looks like he's going to shoot me soon. even todo is pretty nice if you don't interrupt his takada-chan time!"

you sighed in annoyance, you just couldn't say no. ever since coming to the kyoto metropolitan curse tech, miwa and you had been pretty close because you strongly disliked the other students. most of them were arrogant and stuck-up, thinking they were better than the other; the two that belonged to the three clans were even worse. on your first day here you'd promptly gotten into a fight with mai, disliking how haughty she was and trying to prove everyone that she was better than them. much to your chagrin, the fight ended in a tie.

"fine, but you owe me some mango," miwa's face lit up in relief and she gave you a thumbs up before dashing to her room, most likely to escape noritoshi's wrath. you inspected the book. was it even worth returning it? maybe you could just throw it in the trash. if noritoshi ever found out, he'd kill miwa first and then you. you let out another sigh before making your way towards the training grounds. he most likely was outside to practice, either with one of the guys or alone. as you were nearing the training grounds, you could already hear the sound of arrows whistling and the dull thuds of them hitting the target. it was hard to spot him through all the trees; you weren't entirely sure where he was. your ears perked up when you heard him release another arrow until you realized that it was heading your way. this bastard. fortunately, you were able to slash the arrow clean in the middle, angrily pointing your sword in his direction. you still couldn't see him anywhere.

"you fucking idiot! you could've killed me," you snarled, stomping deeper into the forest. an amused laugh echoed through the trees.

"you're acting like i can't control my arrows. it's not my fault you let your guard down," noritoshi retorted smugly, lowering his bow as he saw you approaching. you were fuming, hurling the book at him. how dare he? you watched with satisfaction as it hit him square in the chest - who was caught off guard now, huh? he deserved it anyways.

"miwa asked me to return your book," you curtly explained and turned back around to leave but apparently, noritoshi had other plans. instead of saying anything else, he just followed you which unsettled you even more.

"stop following me."

"who said i was following you? i'm just going back to the dorms. i'm sorry you can't handle me being near you."

you whirled around, sword pointing dangerously close to his neck. he smirked at you triumphantly, it was just too easy to get a rouse out of you. "another word and i'll cut you, seriously. you're pissing me off," you gritted your teeth, hating that you always fell for his stupid games. he knew you all to well, what made you angry, what made you happy, what motivated you. once upon a time, you'd thought the same about him; until he changed so rapidly, so unlike your expectations. you were worlds apart and yet you'd reserved an ounce of hope that he wouldn't turn out to be as arrogant as the clan heads. swift as the wind, noritoshi grabbed your wrist, dragging it upwards and towards him until he could lean down to you. your heartbeat sped up - holy shit why was he so close to you - and you froze in shock.

"i'd like to see you try, princess," he whispered in your ear, the grip on your wrist tightening. "you wouldn't dare to."

the first time you met noritoshi, he was sitting outside in the garden with his mum. both seemed to have a good time. noritoshi's hair was tousled from the soft summer breeze and he had a soft smile on his face, happily munching away on the snacks that were displayed on the table. while he looked friendly enough, you were wary of meeting and talking to him because you felt kind of queasy around the kamo family. you couldn’t quite place a finger on the feeling, the older members of the family intimidating you to no end. much to your dismay, you felt like you had to be watchful - your parents worked for the kamo family, so naturally the apartment you lived in was close to the estate. you avoided any run ins with the adults, they weren’t exactly friendly to you. noritoshi’s mum had befriended your mum and they spent a lot of time together when possible. and yet you’d never met noritoshi before, seeing how busy he was with his various classes.

the fit that you threw, not wanting to tag along with your mum, was long forgotten when you’d spotted the jar of cookies on the table. before your mum could react, you pulled your hand away from hers and quickly ran towards it. “hello miss!” you greeted enthusiastically, your eyes shining at the sight of the sweets. “my name is y/n! i’m here with my mum and i uhm… could i have some of the cookies? please?” when your mum finally caught up to you, she scolded you quietly and greeted the other two, taking a seat beside noritoshi’s mum. you pouted, immediately climbing on her lap as you refused to sit next to the boy. his mum handed you a cookie which you happily took and thanked her politely. noritoshi was curiously eyeing you; it wasn’t often that he saw other children around his age and he didn’t have any friends to play with. his everyday life revolved around reading books, studying, taking archery classes and sometimes spending time with his mum. noritoshi barely even knew what fun was - he’d only ever felt at peace when he was around his mum.

“y/n, sweetie, why don’t you go and play with noritoshi?” your mum prompted but you immediately shook your head, hiding your face in her chest. she simply laughed and shook her head, brushing your hair back softly. “come on, noritoshi is really nice. you can be his friend one day, right? didn’t i tell you that friends are important?”

you frowned. then huffed. when she worded it like this, there was no way you could refuse. the cartoon that you religiously watched featured a group of friends that went on adventures and helped each other out. you’d told your mum that you wanted to be like that too! begrudgingly, you slid off her lap and trudged towards noritoshi who looked at you with big eyes. you held your hand out, waiting for him to shake it. “my name is y/n. uhm… nice to meet you,” you shyly whispered, eyes darting away from him.

it took a while until noritoshi reacted, shaking your hand gently and answering: “hello y/n, i’m noritoshi.”

much to your surprise, noritoshi was actually fun to be around with. he showed you his collection of books, the bow that he was practicing with and you often played the card game you’d received for your birthday together. he was smart and witty, often explaining you things that he’d read in a book but he was also attentive when he listened to you ramble about the other kids in school or when you told him about the cartoon that you were watching. for you, noritoshi was becoming your best friend - for noritoshi, you were his first friend. he cherished you and how unabashedly true to yourself you were. spending time with you was something he looked forward to; you always made him laugh and you didn’t care whether he lived up to the kamo family name or not. to you, he was simply noritoshi. you were like a fresh breeze of air in his life.

noritoshi didn't quite understand why the elders were always so hard on him, so strict and unrelenting. they expected only the best results from him and didn't show any understanding when he exhausted. he didn't enjoy practice anymore, the lessons becoming a chore and burden on his mind. but whenever he saw your face light up at his newly acquired skills, he thought it was worth the trouble. you came to visit him everyday after school, never skipping a day. sometimes he questioned why you weren't visiting your friends from school but you shook your head, poking his chest indignantly. "you're my best friend, 'toshi. of course i'd want to spend more time with you." noritoshi was glad you always chose him, without fail.

even though your parents had always warned you to be careful around noritoshi because his family was strict and didn't like outside influences distracting the heir, you never really strayed from his side. noritoshi didn't have any other friends, who would keep him company or listen to his troubles then? you didn't understand why your parents were suddenly going back on their word. they'd always told you that family and friends were important. you couldn't pinpoint your feelings for him - but your parents saw it. it was obvious; the stars in your eyes when you looked at him, the slight blush on your cheeks when he complimented you and how happy you were when you got to spend time with him. the more time you spent with him, the more they were worried for you.

"'toshi!" you yelled in excitement as you ran towards him, waving wildly. he dropped his bow and turned to you, a soft smile gracing his lips as he opened his arms to hug you. you squeezed him tightly. two weeks you hadn't seen him due to a school trip after which you got sick and weren't able to leave the house. you'd missed him a lot and you were excited to show him the souvenirs you brought him.

"look, i bought you an omamori!" you handed him the small object, then pointing on your bag to show him the one you'd bought for yourself. "i got myself a matching one too! my teacher said it wards off evil spirits and brings you luck." noritoshi's smile was bright, so bright. he was happy you thought of him and were always kind to him. your eyes widened as he leaned in to kiss your cheek before thanking you. the two of you were blushing, neither saying a word but not minding what had just happened.

the day noritoshi's mother left the estate was the day you were slowly starting to lose him. noritoshi grew more forlorn and didn't seem to easily find joy in anything anymore. the departure left a deep, deep gap in his heart. it had shocked him deep to the core when she left him. him. why couldn't she stay? why did she leave him when she was the only person who protected him, loved him? she did say that she was hindering his growth but who was she to decide that? he didn't want to become stronger, didn't want to protect other people like she'd told him to. he wanted to stay with her. "'toshi? 'toshi!" a concerned voice broke through his trance, pulling him back into reality. "i asked you a question! you weren't even listening to me."

you were pouting at him, tugging at his sleeve impatiently. noritoshi apologized, patting your head to soothe your temper. "what do you want to do in the future? mum said it's important to work towards your dreams!" you asked him curiously, grasping his hand to hold it. the gesture filled him with indescribable warmth, drawing him in like a moth to the flames. "my mum said i have a special power, i can heal people! i want to become a doctor in the future, so i can help everyone that got hurt," you explained to him so earnestly that he felt bad for the lie he was about to tell. noritoshi didn't have big dreams or ambitions just yet. he didn't even know what would be suitable to him - he was strictly following orders, never allowed to think for himself.

but when he looked at you, he only had one wish. "i think… i think i want to help people, protect them. especially those that i love."

with each year passing, you noticed that noritoshi was putting more and more distance between the two of you. at first you'd brushed it off as the stress of his training and number of classes he was attending. but as you spent less and less time together, the weight of the situation didn’t escape you. he was easily irritable, cold and arrogant, often rude towards employees of the kamo estate. every now and then when you’d scold him for being an asshole, he’d simply scoff at you and haughtily ask you how it was any of your business. you sighed, tossing and turning in your bed as you thought about how much noritoshi had changed. it kept you up at night, just thinking about how he wasn’t your ‘toshi anymore. you didn’t know this person. ‘toshi was always gentle and kind, he tended to overthink many things and sometimes he was a little bit of a crybaby but you still loved him regardless. you sneaked out of your room, finally mustering up enough courage to ask your mother for advice. the thought of her discovering your blooming crush on noritoshi was scaring you. your parents were wary around the kamos despite working from them - even more so ever since noritoshi’s mother left and the elders had free reign over her son.

“noritoshi! noritoshi, stop walking away from me! hey, i’m talking to you!” you yelled frustrated as you were trying to keep up with him. noritoshi was crossing the garden in long strides, it was nearly impossible to stop him as you couldn’t catch up to him. you lunged forward, getting hold of his sleeve and tugged him back harshly. noritoshi yanked his arm out of your grip, glaring at you annoyed.

“what do you want from me? i have better things to do than to quibble with you,” he hissed irritated. you couldn’t believe him, he had the nerve to dismiss you like this when he was in the wrong?

“you know exactly what i want from you! you can’t just go around and talk to people like you did before just because they’re not from a reputable family! noritoshi, you’re not any better than them just because your last name is kamo.”

as much as noritoshi scared you, you stood your ground. you knew he didn’t take you serious, not with the amused look he gave you. in the past month or two, noritoshi was suddenly hit by a growth spurt - you barely reached his shoulder now and he took advantage of that to mock you, often treating you like an armrest. he pat your head condescendingly, pouting at you in fake regret. “aw, did i hurt your feelings? did i make itty bitty little y/n sad?” he mocked you, before abruptly grabbing your cheeks to make you look at him. “i don’t care what you think of me, cry all you want. i strongly suggest you hold that sharp tongue of yours if you know what’s good. know your place.”

tears filled your eyes; noritoshi had never talked to you this way. what has gotten into him? your heart broke in pieces, unable to take the pain any longer. you were no longer his equal but below him, much like everyone else.

“mum?” you cautiously knocked at the door of her study, waiting for her response. your mother was most likely still awake and dealing with paperwork like she usually did. upon hearing the affirmative noise she made, you flitted inside, closing the door behind you so your father didn’t catch any wind of this. it was already embarrassing enough and you were sure your mother could offer you better advice. you gingerly took a seat on the armchair, grabbing a pillow and hugging it close to your body. how were you going to approach this? hey mum, i have a crush on noritoshi and he’s weird to me now and i don’t know why? uh yeah mum, i caught feelings for the guy you warned me about and now i look like a fool crawling up to you like this?

“it’s about noritoshi, isn’t it?” your mother interrupted your stream of thought, spinning her swivel chair towards you.

“huh? oh no it isn’t, why would it be? i have-”

“y/n.”

“ugh okay fine, maybe it is about him,” you sighed defeated, of course she would look right through you. she always seemed to know what you were thinking, even when you hadn’t confided in her before. “but promise me you won’t judge me!” the look in your mother’s eyes told you that she was going to judge you regardless but you knew she meant well - she simply wanted the best for you.

“i- i just don’t understand why he’s been such a pain in the ass lately. and he’s been treating everyone like dirt too, including me! mum, he’s becoming someone else and i… i don’t know what to do,” you sniffled inconsolably, wiping at your eyes with the sleeves of your sweater. she wasn’t supposed to see you getting emotional. “he’s always busy and when we do get to see each other, he doesn’t want to spend time with me. what if he doesn’t like me anymore? and i don’t like how he’s treating you! it’s the same issue with the elders, they don’t know any human decency at all!”

your mother motioned you to scoot over a little and sat next to you, wrapping her arms around you and patting your back to console you. while she meant well, it accomplished the opposite - you broke down in tears, unable to stop your sobs. “i just want my ‘toshi back,” you whimpered upset, burying your face in the pillow to muffle the sound of you crying. “i know you didn’t like that i became good friends with him but i couldn’t help it and i just really like him and- you weren’t supposed to find that out.”

“sweetheart, i know you love noritoshi,” she handed you a tissue. “you let a lot more on than you were aware of; dad and me always knew you were in love with him.” as if on cue, your sobbing stopped and you just looked at her in disbelief. she knew. she knew. you wanted the earth to swallow you whole. “i think it was always pretty obvious, to be honest. you always looked at him as if he was your entire world and no matter what happened, you were always by his side. i know it’s hard to accept when a dear friend is changing but sometimes you just have to, right? both of you are still growing, there’s no way of telling how your personalities change.”

“but i don’t want him to change like this,” you protested stubbornly, glaring at her. she was talking about it as if it was a matter of simply discarding a bad apple in the trash. it wasn’t easy and it made you anxious. you grew up together, shared secrets and memories. he was the person you’d always looked up to.

“y/n.” your mother sounded stern but you didn’t back down, not yet. “is it really worth it? if a person is changing so rapidly and you’re not getting through to them, you’ll have to let it go. there’s only so much you can do. people grow apart sometimes, it’s only natural. you have to let go of them, temporarily, so you both can heal and grow. y/n, i know you’re being stubborn about this but you’ll have to let him figure things out on his own. fate has curious ways to bring people back together.”

when the time came, noritoshi left to attend the kyoto metropolitan curse tech school without telling you a word. you were disappointed, apparently you weren’t worth saying goodbye to. whatever his reason was, it must’ve been pretty important. important enough to forget the promise that you’d always stay in contact. you wondered whether he'd change again, for the better maybe? maybe you would reconcile when you could finally attend the school as well and train together. you were excited to show him your sword skills, having received your family's heirloom, an elegant steel blue sword. though your skills probably weren’t up to par with the other students, you still wanted to show them off, show him what you’d learned in the year that you spent apart.

noritoshi had changed but not for the better. holy shit, did he get on your nerves. the first time he'd practiced with you, you realized that he had mutated into an insufferable know-it-all. he would give you backhanded compliments or make snide remarks about your posture, how you were supposed to hold your sword, how inefficient your fighting style was. sometimes you wished you could just beat him for once and have him shut up. there was no denying though, noritoshi was way too strong and you had a long way to go. judging from the reactions of the others, barely anyone had beat him either.

and just like that, your feelings for him were buried. you’d taken your mother’s advice to heart, keeping conversations and interactions with him to a minimum but somehow noritoshi always found his way to you. he was everywhere and a quarrel was inevitable. noritoshi got under your skin and he knew how to push your buttons. why he chose to pick on you was beyond your comprehension; he didn’t pay much attention to the other students nor was he particularly liked by them. just how much was he going to get on everyone else’s nerves? out of all the second years, todo aoi was the most amicable; you had the (dis)pleasure to run into him on your first day and for some reason, he took a liking to you. while he was loud and boisterous, mostly doing whatever he wanted, you couldn’t deny that he was a good friend. even though he didn’t care about anyone as much as he cared about takada-chan. at one point, he’d looked at you in sympathy when he caught you staring at noritoshi, patting your shoulder (too forceful): “i’m sorry, y/n, i’m so sorry.”

you still didn’t know what he meant by that.

ps.: todo knows and he’s kinda judging you for your taste in men

#jujutsu kaisen #kamo noritoshi #noritoshi #noritoshi x reader #kamo noritoshi x reader #noritoshi kamo #noritoshi kamo x reader #noritoshi x you #kamo noritoshi x you #noritoshi kamo x you #noritoshi kamo imagines #kamo noritoshi imagines #jujutsu kaisen imagines #noritoshi imagines #fic: sanguine #writing #my writing has gotten SO incredibly rusty i literally only know how to write academic papers anymore bc that's all i do in my everyday life #it makes me speechless to see all the love on my previous sukuna fic and i'm so glad people are enjoying it #hey if you're lurking in the tags thank you for reading i really appreciate it! pls stay hydrated

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bakubub · 3 years

Text

favourite time of year

w/c: 1.2k

written for @kal0psi-a 's halloween collab

folding the sticky dough carefully, just as the recipe instructed, i try my best to ignore the itching in my nose in a feeble attempt to stay concentrated, but give up when it starts to irritate my eyes.

"eughh, because of you there's flour in my nose," i complain to my boyfriend, who has his chin hooked over my shoulder and very heavily leaning over me.

"hey, don't complain! have you seen my hair?" he asks, stretching his neck to show me. sure enough, his hair is more white than it is black. i rake my hand through it before he can say anything, my dough covered hands clumping his hair together as an avalanche of flour sprinkles all over my chest.

he screeches, jumping back from me and i quickly use this chance to start running, because based on previous incidents, there's a 90% chance he will chase me relentlessly.

his cough from across the kitchen halts my escape plan, "are you happy now? i have flour in my nose too," he complains.

i watch in amusement as a cloud of flour puffs around him in the shape of a mushroom as he sneezes heavily, looking quite literally like a cartoon character and quickly near him to snap a picture. this will do nicely for the autumn section in this year's album.

since we started dating, tetsuro and i have been taking photos of one another, which we organise into albums by year, separated by season. it started when he gave me an album on our first anniversary, now, 6 years later and married, putting together an album of the past year has become tradition. each season we do an activity that correlates with the vibe, and today, we're making pumpkin pie with halloween shape indents because really, what else comes to mind when you think of fall?

i laugh loudly at the photo i took, his face caught mid sneeze, and it seems to flick the switch deep within tetsuro that i thought i had flicked earlier, and his feline gaze snaps to mine, before lurching forward in an attempt to catch me. i move just in the nick of time and run to the other side of the bench. he chases me until we're playing cat and mouse around the bench like children, slowly stalking one another as the other makes it as though they're backtracking but running forward instead.

"give up, wicked witch!" he exclaims, putting his right hand on his heart and holding the other outwards as he closes his eyes, apparently overwhelmed with emotion, "it is i, prince tetsu-" in the midst of his theatrics, i move in for the kill. his need for dramatics is most definitely his achille's heel, i think as i stab him in the hip with my fingers, and he yelps, opening his eyes only to find the mouse catching the cat.

"and the wicked witch of fall wins!" i yell, jumping up and down, getting flour all over the hardwood floors.

"fine, this round goes to you. your reward? a magical kiss from your prince charming," he says, leaning in and halting my celebration.

"the prince kisses the witch? haven't heard this fairy-tale before," i mutter before he silences me by placing a soft but unhurried kiss on my lips. my hands automatically make their way around his neck, and i lean back slightly as his hands firmly hold my waist, providing protection and support even in a moment as miniscule as this. in the glow of the autumn sunset, painting our kitchen with a golden hue, with the man i love in front of me, everything is perfect. we break off, his forehead leaning on mine, neither of us moving away.

"this is our fairy-tale, with its own happy ending."

looking up, I'm met with his golden brown stare, the small specks of gold especially visible in this lighting, practically glowing. his white turtle neck hugging his form nicely, and his raven hair sprinkled with flour, i can't help but wonder if this is what we're going to be like in the future, when we've lived our lives, and grown old together; the only indication of our age being the salt and pepper hair, and the slightly more prominent lines around our eyes from spending a lifetime of smiling.

because that's how it would be, i think, to have tetsuro next to me for eternity, to smile and to laugh every day.

he has to kneel down considerably to reach my lips with his own, to rest his forehead on mine, but the look on his face and the emotion in his familiar, beautiful eyes reflect nothing but comfort and content, genuine even as he says stupid and cliché things. in a way, he’s promising me nothing but a life full of the music of our happiness.

"i love you, witch," he whispers, as if afraid to ruin the moment by speaking.

i kiss him again, before pulling out my secret weapon and dumping more flour over his head. "love you too, prince!" i screech as i run away. i hear his chuckles as he chases after me, muttering empty promises of revenge just as he did before, and every other time, and hopefully, if my luck holds out, every time after.

---

"okay, nod gonna lie, dis ith really goo-dh" i say, speaking with a mouth full of the pumpkin pie we finally got around to baking.

i watch him snap a photo of me, smiling through my full mouth, knowing full well i have pie all over my mouth and teeth.

“you’ve never looked better, babe,” he says, chuckling, before trying it himself, moaning through his full mouth, "oh mhy gohd." i roll my eyes as he continues, "baby, thth is fudding amathing," he says, taking another, and then another bite.

“slow it down, moron. you’re going to choke and the wicked witch is going to have to ruin her comfy position to give you the heimlich,” i say, my legs crossed on the carpeted floor with my feet nice and warm in my thick panda bear socks.

“how abouth we sthip straighd to the kith of life?” he asks, wiggling his eyebrows with a mouth full of pie.

"how about you shuffle the cards, prince? i'll pick a movie," i suggest, or rather order, raising my brows. he salutes sarcastically as he sets down his plate and goes to get our worn out deck of uno cards.

"i thought you were a witch, not a princess," he mutters once he swallows his pie.

"actually, i married the prince so that legally makes me a princess. c'mon tetsuro," i say, pressing play on a random comedy to play in the background.

with the fireplace going under the television, and our pumpkin spice and cinnamon candles lit, the room is cozy, warm and calm.

that is until tetsuro yells his profanities about me placing a 2+ on his 4+.

"THAT'S NOT ALLOWED! YOU CAN ONLY PLACE A 4+ ON TOP OF A 4+"

"since WHEN?! THIS WASN'T THE RULE LAST WEEK!" i scream back, refusing to back down. i am not picking up four cards. "i would never cheat. unlike YOU," i accuse, shoving another fork full of the pie into my mouth in defiance.

he dramatically gasps shoving a fork full of pie into his own mouth, and glares at me. i glare right back, both of us wordlessly agreeing that whoever loses the staring competition loses the uno argument. ignoring the burning in my eyes, i keep my expression neutral as i watch the tears building up in tetsuro's lashline, his right eye twitching and turning slightly red.

"YES!" i scream as he blinks, wiping his eyes and sighing dramatically before beginning to pick up six cards, unable to come up with an excuse.

i laugh mercilessly and we continue the game, which i ended up winning after he picked up another 12 cards, flashing me the 'please have mercy on me' eyes every time he reached for the deck.

"you really are a wicked little witch aren't you?" he mutters as he gets up. i snort in response, eating the last of my pie.

"i wanna another slice," he announces. "you want?" nodding eagerly, i give him my plate.

"i want a slice with a bat," i call out, referring to the misshapen shapes we cut out on the top layer of the pie.

when he came back, he halted at the door as he silently watches me set up face masks and mani-pedi equipment on the coffee table, the entire pie tray with two forks, instead of two slices, in his hands. i raised my eyebrows, and he mirrors my expression towards my makeshift salon on the floor of our living room.

we both shrug and he comes and sits next to me, picking up a face mask packet and reading the description.

"ooh! aloe vera!"

that's how we ended up watching shitty comedies all night with white face masks on and stomachs stuffed with pie.

---

laying in bed my head resting on tetsuro's shoulder and my hand rhythmically stroking his hair, i bask in the feeling of comfort and my mind being stress free. shielded from the cold night with a million blankets and the massive man sleeping next to me, with my especially cold, numb feet tucked under his thigh, i match my breathing with his easily as i follow after him into a deep slumber.

because that's what the season of autumn is about, really. taking it easy after the adventurous months that were spring and summer, to rewind and become a home-bug again as the weather cools down. and these moments with tetsuro?

these moments are what makes this my favourite time of year.

ahhh this was so, so fun!! special thanks to @/kal0psi-a for organising this entire collab <3

#2021 fall collab #collab event #collab #haikyu x reader #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsuro x you #kuroo x gn!reader #kuroo comfort #kuroo tetsuro scenarios #kuroo tetsuro #fall 2021

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