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genshingorlsrevengeance · 8 months

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(GFL) AR Team singing Karaoke for their S/O

(AR Team) M4A1, ST AR-15, M4 SOPMOD II, M16A1, RO635

No one requested this, it popped into my head because the song in question is called "Machine Gun Kiss" from Yakuza. ...I'm ashamed I haven't thought of this sooner.

(M4A1) "Y-You want me to sing?"

(S/O) "Karaoke isn't supposed to be serious. You don't got to worry if you sound bad. It's all part of the experience! And it's only me here so just focus on having fun!"

Trusting S/O, she simply nodded with a smile and picked up the microphone and looked through the song choices.

(M4A1) "...Wow, this is quite the outdated machine. This looks like its from the 2010's!"

(S/O) "I guess the Commander likes things retro? Beats me."

Finally deciding on a song, she prepared her vocal module as the screen displayed the song.

...

STAR looks a bit bewildered when S/O hands her a microphone.

(ST AR-15) "I'm not sure this is a good idea."

(S/O) "It's just for fun! You don't have to do perfectly."

(STAR) "...Hm, alright. I suppose I'm interested in trying something new."

...

(SOPMOD) "AW HECK YEAH! Gimme that microphone and turn that STEREO UP!"

(S/O) "Hah, yes ma'am!"

SOPMOD was almost bouncing up and down in excitement, her eyes sparkling as soon as she heard the music begin.

...

(M16A1) "WHEW! Okay, got enough alcohol in me, let's do this! What kinda song you got for me?"

(S/O) "How's this?"

M16 smiled as soon as she saw the name.

(M16A1) "Hell yeah, put that in!"

RO twiddled her fingers.

(RO635) "I'm told that my singing is...not exactly the best, S/O."

(S/O) "Who cares what they say, we're here to have fun! Plus, if it makes it any better, I'm your only audience tonight!"

(RO635) "I...I don't know if it does, to be quite honest S/O."

She sighed, wryly smiling.

(RO635) "Keep this between us, okay?"

...

(M4A1) "O-Okay, here we go!" ... (ST AR-15) "Here goes nothing..." ... (SOPMOD) "OKAY, LET'S GET FIRED UP!" ... (M16A1) "Now we're talking, let's DO THIS!" ... (RO635) "I sing for you...!"

====

M4 sways her hips to the beat, her voice starting out soft as the lyrics begin.

"Midnight shadow evaporates Accelerate through this old highway city..."

====

STAR is still unsure, but seeing S/O clap along with the beat cheering her on was making her slowly more confident.

"Into the night, you by my side, your tear-stained eyes Rouge running down your cheek, but baby-"

====

SOPMOD was on board since the VERY second S/O brought it up, her voice flaring up as she sang, motioning her hands passionately.

"Tonight everything's all right As long as you're here next to me My sweet babe-"

====

Even though M16 was half a bottle of whiskey into the night, that did not stop her from being coherent enough to sing the lyrics, getting really into the spirit.

"Now let's let go of our Past and our future This night has room for only two, you and me"

====

RO was starting to have fun watching S/O's smile as she sang her heart out, finally letting go and committing fully into the song.

"So come and see, I'll show you paradise tonight!"

====

(M4A1) "Not just 1 kiss-" ... (ST AR-15) "-Not 2 kisses-" ... (SOPMOD) "-Not one hundred-" ... (M16A1) "-I've got a full-" ... (RO635) "-Clip of love for you, baby!" ... (M4A1) "Hold on to me and-" ... (ST AR-15) "-I swear I won't let go-" ... (SOPMOD) "-I'll never,- ... (M16A1) "-Let you slip-" ... (RO635) "-Away from me!" ... (M4A1) "Machine-" ... (ST AR-15) "-Gun-" ... (SOPMOD) "-Kiss-" ... (M16A1) "Let's-" ... (RO635) "-Just-!"

"FALL IN LOOOOOOOVE! WOOOAAAAAAH OH-OOOOOOOOOH!"

====

M4A1 was breathing heavily as her smile overtook her anxiety, S/O's clapping putting her in an even better mood.

(S/O) "That was great!"

(M4A1) "T-Thank you! Now, I believe it's your turn?"

====

(ST AR-15) "Whew, that song was a lot nicer than I expected."

(S/O) "You killed it, STAR!"

STAR smiled bashfully.

(ST AR-15) "Hm.~ Wanna give it a shot now?"

====

SOPMOD pumped her fists before raising them into the air.

(SOPMOD) "WOOO! YEAH! That song is awesome!"

(S/O) "Wanna go again?"

(SOPMOD) "You know it, get me another!"

====

M16 took another drink, wiping her mouth.

(M16A1) "Machine Gun Kiss, eh? Fitting song!"

(S/O) "You got really into it, M16!"

(M16A1) "Psh, I saw you singing along with me!"

====

RO put her hands together, looking at S/O.

(RO635) "H-How did I do?"

(S/O) "Just fine, did you have fun?"

(RO635) "I...I did, thank you!"

#girls' frontline imagines #girls' frontline headcanons #girls' frontline x reader #m4a1 x reader #st ar 15 x reader #m4 sopmod ii x reader #m16a1 x reader #ro635 x reader #m4a1 gfl #st ar 15 gfl #m4 sopmod ii gfl #m16a1 gfl #ro635 gfl

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fitzs-trained-monkey · 1 year

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Cassie's Cot Kerfuffle: PART TWO

Five Hundred Follower Celebration!

Alright, so I have no bloody clue how this happened but by some twist of fate, here we are! It's crazy, but I am super excited about it and I just wanted to thank everyone who's cared enough about my fics and/or art to click that follow button!

As some of you may know (because I've been whining about it) I had the misfortune of breaking my elbow a few weeks ago and was thus unable to write. But I am now past that stage of the healing process and I can finally get back to what I love!

First, I want to make it clear that I'm still taking requests, but seeing as I've been out of commission for a while, I have quite a few fics already waiting. (Seriously, there are so many sequels that I just haven't gotten around to.) So, in celebration of five hundred followers, I thought it might be fun for you guys to choose what comes out first!

(If you're not familiar with my work, feel free to check out my Masterlist. I will write for Finn, Elijah, Niklaus, and Kol Mikaelson along with Stefan Salvatore and Jack Kline. I will not write smut but anything else is free game. I hope you enjoy!)

I already have one fic that's nearly finished, so that will come out first, but from there I will be abiding by the results of this poll. I'm so excited to see what you guys are excited for and my gratitude for each of you is beyond words. I swear it feels like I just barely reached one hundred followers like a month ago. But lo and behold, I look at my profile one day only to get smacked in the face by the big FIVE-ZERO-ZERO! Thank you all so, so, so much.

One more thing before I get back to writing, I quickly want to offer a very special thank you to some of my very best supporters and kindest friends. @gabrielasilva1510 - You've been here for me since the very beginning. You're my all around bestie and I love you. @yn-ymn-yln - You honestly made up 86% of my confidence in the beginning and I owe you so much. @impala67-aka-baby - You are such a good friend to me and your advice is the stuff of legends. I owe all my ringtones and alarm sounds to you. @princess-charming-01 - You may not have been around as long as some others but you have been so supportive and kind, even though I've been an invalid for half the time since I met you. @heartbreakgrill - You come up with some of the best ideas I've ever heard and your comments on my fics are always so sweet. @sorry-that-i - We may not know each other super well, but thanks for the song recs. The past few weeks have been difficult and I really needed that extra boost, also you have an excellent taste in music. (Black Sheep is my favorite 😂) @r13mar - All your comments and reblogs are literally too kind and your taste in gifs never fails to make me laugh. Thanks so much to each of you for supporting me! I couldn't have gotten here without you!

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mydaroga · 2 years

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Recent music meme

Tagged by @goldslick to post 10 songs I’ve had on repeat recently.

This will probably be embarrassing since I'm basically all Beatles/Macca all the time, but it's also weird because I don't really listen to things on repeat--I've been writing so I've just put my "writing albums" on here and I've also been listening to whole records mostly as I work through the catalog. Also I guess Tidal doesn't really keep track of listens? ANYWAY ENOUGH EXCUSES!

Long Tailed Winter Bird / Paul McCartney. Hey McCartney III is pretty good and I just dig this song a lot. I think this really is sticking with me because I didn’t expect old!Paul to have anything that would really reach out and while this isn’t like, revolutionary? I really dig the groove and I really love that he just went into the studio during lockdown and made something beautiful. I’ve been pulling this out to show people he’s still alive and stuff.

Nineteen Hundred and Eighty Five / Wings. Honestly wasn’t expecting to love Wings? But this was one of those that hit me when I got to Band on the Run that I just had to crank up and play again. Hey this rocks!

Dear Boy / Paul McCartney. I swear I’ll get to something else eventually but yes I’m still obsessed with this song. I have no idea why except to me, there’s this really intoxicating mixture of sweetness and menace. I don’t mean the lyrics are menacing. I actually mean the unrelenting harmonies feel sinister to me and I know not everyone feels that but I love it.

Spirit of Eden and Colour of Spring, whole albums / Talk Talk. I know they’re mostly known for their one hit single, “It’s My Life,” which you might know from the also excellent No Doubt cover. But I’m putting both of these records on here because this is my primary “writing” music. I have never found anything nearly this good: they’re dynamic and beautiful but somehow not intrusive on my creative process. So it’s more than “ambient” but they don’t distract me and I can’t recommend them highly enough.

Stairway to Heaven / Dolly Parton. My dad sent me a link to this a few weeks ago and I can’t stop thinking about it. I cried the first time I listened to it. The original is one of my mom’s favorites, and I love it, but something about this really captures the spirit of the original but puts a whole new spin on it. There’s something about Dolly’s plaintive vocals and the way this song is somehow made for banjo that kills me.

Twist and Shout / The Beatles. Yes I know it’s a cover but there’s just something about this song that’s become quintessential early boys for me. There’s the obvious fact of John shredding his voice but that scream Paul does right before the last chorus is something else.

What Is Life / George Harrison. This is one of those songs I got to and had to just listen to over three times to remind myself that I was already in love with it without knowing who it was. I hadn’t heard it in AGES but when I put on All Things Must Pass for the first time, this is where it came home. Just a perfect song.

Day in the Life / The Beatles. I can’t say I’m sitting there with this literally on repeat, but I need something on this list to stand in for how I’m hearing their songs in a new way, with new feelings. This song was always genius, but it is so much more to me now and I’ve definitely sat with my ear to the speaker just trying to understand it better. And picking apart the alternate takes. Again. Can’t do it too much because actual crying.

Everybody’s Talkin’ / Harry Nilsson. Again this is sort of a stand-in for the fact that my other primary writing soundtrack is an embarrassing mix of mostly-70s pop and MOR. It’s comforting to me and it doesn’t get in the way of my wording. And this is one of those songs that, when I do hear it again, makes me realize how brilliant simplicity can be. And how you can put sweetness and longing and disillusion into three minutes.

I’d like to say I listen to more modern music and I do but like, not by much. And right now I’m really unwilling to stray from the zone of either self-instruction or writing music, so there it is. Tagging (if you want!) @inspiteallthedanger , @merseydreams, @beatle-shampoo , @theoldmixer , @slettlune, @prettypersuasion , @brummelliana , @jeanpaul-georges-ringeaux, @gnocchichi and anyone else who wants me to add them!

#memes #music #my music #kris talks a lot

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finexbright · 2 years

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and now the lyrics of the 1d/hs1 leaks

baby honey

well i think i wrote a song that all your friends are gonna like

but they tell you that they hate it when they don't just cuz it's mine

and i swear that i'm not thinking about you all the time

it'll only take a minute take a listen maybe change your mind

(chorus)

now i'm getting older, am i getting over you? (x3)

i guess you'll never know

oh i know he's got the money baby honey

does he make it ____

is it true he doesn't touch you in the place i know you like?

and i swear i'm not thinking about you all the time

just today, yesterday, everyday and tomorrow night

(chorus)

i swear i'm not thinking about you now (x2)

(chorus)

———

complicated freak

she got wrapped up in somebody else

i'm wrapped up stuck in love with myself

i never saw this coming around

but i miss her skin on me now

tip of my tongue, she's pulling my hair

i do what she wants anywhere

backseat of the car or up in the air

but i miss how she kissed everywhere

(chorus)

i can't get you off my mind (x2)

i still crave it complicated freak (x3)

turned up too late one too many times

bad choice of words in my alibi

i guess that i'm crazy, do you mind

you've lost your head so i'll give you mine

(chorus)

she got wrapped up in someday else

i'm wrapped up stuck in love with myself

(chorus)

———

hunger

candles burn down to the floor

where in (wearing?) less than you were before

shoes sitting by the door

never picking up

we would stay in my house for days

spending breakfast in ___ cases

your stuff don't taste the same that you're gone

guess sometimes i'm overthinking

when things go wrong and i can't adjust

i lost the taste for the good enough

and i'm sorry

(chorus)

we had a hunger then

only each then

couldn't get enough when we started

always a hunger then

now it's just emptiness

we were in love, we were starving

we had a hunger then

we could ruin a perfect night

on my birthday i made you cry

you told me you learnt to drive

i guess you lied

i could never get sick of you

i just eat more off than i could chew

and as one year turns into two

i'm still not over you, still not over you

(chorus)

guess i'm prone to overthinking

i lost my taste for the good enough

i never called when i knew i should

i'm sorry oh i'm sorry

(chorus)

———

trouble (is this a haylor song 💀)

listen to the song i wrote

and all these notes i put them there for you

i still taste the time we kissed

upon my lips swimming in the blue

it never snows in hollywood

but when we sang it showed us that it could

i carried you across the way

and you showed me that 13 can be good

(chorus)

you flip me upside down

we both laid on the ground

and i don't even know

but i feel like i do sometimes

looking in your eyes

when i see that smile

there's trouble

so turn around and i'll hold my hands up

and you'll know i'm trouble, i'm trouble with you

if i could have a hundred things

not one of them could compare to you

and we could take this anywhere

cause where we're going

we don't need no shoes

(chorus)

and you know that i'll be gone in the morning

and i hope you'll that you'll think of me

like i think of you all the time

looking in your eyes

when i see that smile

there's trouble

so turn around and i'll hold my hands up

and you'll know i'm trouble, i'm trouble with you

(chorus)

———

already home

i've been waiting everyday since

the last we met i can't forget

what we parted ways with

i see your face and can't stop looking

i swear that these words haven't been heard

in the way i mean them

(pre chorus)

is this really happening?

this is really happening

can this keep on happening?

together we're alone

both of us agree

and no one needs to know

that you're already home

you don't have to go

but you're already leaving

can we stop believing?

you're already home

you don't have to go

cause you're already home

we can't sleep in

for good reason

a bottle of wine, pretending is fine

you breathe out, i breathe in

we've been stealing

moments, feelings

we know it's not right

your car is outside

with a cold seat in

(pre chorus + chorus)

in alleyways, fire escapes, corridors

i see your face from aeroplanes to the bullet trains

it's on the sky to the pouring rain

all the future plans that we'll never make

from a beaten heart to the farthest place

you're already home, you're already home

———

HIM

so you arrive, as you always do

the one who stays and the one who's leaving you

hear me out, my apologies

cuz i'm not here for sympathy

(chorus)

cuz i don't wanna hear about him

how he's holding you better at night

i don't wanna hear about him

in these songs you continue to write

i was with you when you wrote that line

it was me that you had on your mind

so i don't wanna hear about him

that nice dress

and my wildest dreams

the lipstick stains you left still on my sheets

when i hear amazing eyes

it breaks my heart everytime

(chorus)

do you know what it's like

to fall in love on the outside

i don't know but i've been trying for you, for me

now i know what it's like to fall in love on the outside, i-i-i-i

(chorus)

is he holding you better at night?

is it me running into your mind?

i still think about you all the time?

#harry styles #hs3 spoilers

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cherrycheridarling · 3 years

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happier | t.h.

tom holland x singer!reader

warnings: swearing and sad. fluff if you squint

summary: you wish tom the best with his new relationship in your new song. {listen to happier by olivia rodrigo (if you want)}

wc: 3.6k

'We broke up a month ago,'

"I've been thinking," your heart sunk at his words, "I'm always working." he grabbed both of your hands.

You locked your gaze in his. Sat in the living room of his shared flat. Inches apart yet you could already feel the separation between the two of you growing.

He avoided your eye contact, "I-I can't be in a relationship unless I can give one hundred percent of myself to the other person. A-and I know I haven't been doing that to you, which is c-completely unfair." he wiped away a tear from your cheek that you didn't know had fell, "You've been so, so good to me. I'm sorry I wasn't better, but I can't keep putting you through this." his voice was barely audible.

You finally tore your eyes away from his face. His tear soaked face. Choosing to stare at a spot over his shoulder instead. You took three deep breaths. In and out. Something about his words made you confused, but your pain overpowered it.

"Please say something. Anything." he whispered against your knuckles. Holding your hands to his lips.

You gently removed your hands from his grip, "Thank you for being mature and honest with me." you started with a sniffle, "Thank you for all of our memories and for showing me what love is," you cupped his face, "Thank you for everything, loser." your light laugh lacked any humour, but it still brought a slight smile to his face.

He held your hand that was resting on his jaw, "I love you more than life itself, darling." he kissed your palm and you felt your heart shatter. "Never hesitate to call, dummy."

You nodded with a sad smile. "I love you, too." You stood up and made your way out of the door. A year and a half down the drain within ten minutes.

'Your friends are mine, you know I know you moved on. Found someone new.'

"Do you guys wanna do something on Saturday? I don't have work. Maybe karaoke?" you asked the group without looking up from your phone.

Harrison made a confused noise, "Did you forget? We have Nadia's birthday par—" you heard a loud smack, "—Ow! What? Oh, shit."

You looked up to see Zendaya, Jacob, Harry, Sam and Tuwaine all glaring at Harrison.

"Absolute div." Tuwaine muttered.

You furrowed your eyebrows, "Who's Nadia?" you looked at all of them as they avoided eye contact. "Daya?"

She let out a long sigh before clearing her throat, "Um, Nadia is- Well she's kind of- you know, um—"

"—Tom's new girlfriend." Sam finished for her.

Your mouth formed an 'o' shape as you processed the information. His new girlfriend. It'd been a month and four days since he ended your relationship. And he had a new girlfriend.

It took him a month to move on. A month to be able to give a hundred percent of himself to someone.

You couldn't tell if you were more angry or sad. Maybe a mixture of both. Angry that your friends were hiding information from you, but at the same time you understood their intentions. Sad and upset because the boy who told you he wasn't ready to give a hundred percent of himself was already with someone new.

You slowly nodded, "Oh, okay. Well, I hope you guys have fun." you gave a tight lipped smile before looking back at your phone.

Everyone glanced at each other worriedly before allowing their gazes to fall on you again.

"How do you feel?" Jacob asked cautiously.

You locked your phone and set it on your lap, "I'm fine." you faked a smile, "I think I'm gonna head home, though. It's getting late and I have an early studio session. Bye." you quickly grabbed your purse and left with a small wave.

"Y/N! Wait—" the slamming of the front door cut Tuwaine off.

It was three p.m. and you weren't supposed to be in the studio until noon.

'One more girl who brings out the better in you,'

"Y/N/N. You need to talk about it sooner or later." Zendaya reminded you as she sat at the end of your bed with Harrison beside her.

You removed the covers from your face, revealing your tear stained cheeks, "Does she make him happy?"

There was silence from your two friends before they hesitantly nodded. Both weren't completely sure, but they assumed she did.

"Does she bring out the best version of him? Does she stroke his hair while they cuddle? Does she cook with him? Does she walk Tessa with him?"

Harrison sighed, "Y/N/N, we—"

"—Because that's what I did. I brought out the best side of him. I stroked his hair while we cuddled. I cooked with him. I walked Tessa with him. I did it all. Every single thing." your voice broke towards the end as you let the sobs rack through your body.

Harrison and Zendaya went to either side of you and held you. They just held you. Because even they didn't know what to do.

'And I thought my heart was detached from all the sunlight of our past,'

"Are you sure you're okay with this?" Zendaya asked as you walked towards Tom's front door.

You nodded and smoothed down your sundress, "Yeah. We ended on good terms. It's been two months or so. We're friends. Plus, I miss hanging out with all of us." you assured her.

She sighed before knocking on the door, "Alright."

A few moments later the door swung open revealing Tom. Dressed in black jeans and a white button-up. Sleeves rolled up to his elbows. Curls dangling over his forehead. A sweet smile on his lips.

You felt your stomach lurch. Air leaving your lungs involuntarily. Heart rate quickening. You could smell his cologne and every single memory with him clouded your mind.

"Hey! It's great to see you guys—"

"—Sorry. I-I think I left something in the car. One second." you rushed out the words before turning on your heel.

Zendaya let out a long sigh, "Fuck."

Tom frowned, "Did I do something wrong?"

'But she's so sweet, she's so pretty. Does she mean you forgot about me?'

"Y/N!" an unfamiliar voice called out to you from somewhere in the boys' backyard.

It was Harrison's annual barbecue get together. Nearly three months since your break up with Tom.

You turned towards the source of the noise and found a girl walking towards you. Brunette. Tight black dress with black heels. Body and face of a model.

"I've been dying to meet you! I'm such a huge fan. I basically live off of your music." she giggled as she hugged you.

You smiled, "Aw! Thank you! That means so much to me. You look amazing, by the way."

She laughed, "Thank you! But you're absolutely gorgeous! Sorry, I completely forgot to introduce myself. I'm Nadia, Tom's girlfriend."

Of fucking course.

You raised your eyebrows, but managed to keep a smile on your face, "Oh! I've heard so much about you! Well, Tom's one lucky guy," you chuckled, "I'd love to chat some more, but I need to use the washroom. Excuse me. It was a pleasure meeting you." you gave her a hoaxed smile before quickly walking away.

You were two feet away from the washroom when Zendaya grabbed your arm, "What's wrong? You look like you've seen a ghost or something."

Your breaths were coming out in short puffs, "I just met Nadia?"

Her eyes widened before she dragged you towards Tuwaine's room, "Okay. Let's sit down."

'Oh, I hope you're happy, but not like how you were with me. I'm selfish, I know. I can't let you go,'

"You should move in here." Tom mumbled against your shirt.

You let out a small laugh, "You already have four roommates, love. One more might turn this into a barn."

He lifted his head off of your chest, "I'm serious. Driving from Manchester to Kingston all the time is such a hassle for you. We have recording studios here and it would make me the happiest man in the world if I could wake up to your gorgeousness everyday." he planted kisses on your forehead, nose and lips.

You chuckled at his boyish grin, "It's only a three hour drive and I'm sure the boys don't want me imposing on your time with them."

He quickly shook his head, "I already talked to them about it and they want you here, too."

You raised your eyebrows, "Well, if you're sure it'll make you the happiest man in the world, I'll think about it."

"You already make me the happiest man in the world, but I needed something to convince you." he rested his head on your chest again as you laughed.

'So find someone great, but don't find no one better. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier.'

"Are we ordering pizza?" Harrison yawned from beside you on the couch.

"Sushi?" you grinned hopefully.

Tuwaine shook his head, "We had sushi last night."

"Tom and I are making dinner for you guys!" Nadia reminded you from the kitchen.

Her arms wrapped around Tom's waist as he stirred whatever was in the pan he had on the stove.

You really hated their open floor layout at that moment since there wasn't a wall to block them from your view.

"Oh, yeah. What're you making?" Sam asked.

"Salmon with rice and steamed veggies." Tom answered without looking up from the pan.

Everyone made noises of realization as you turned to Harry, "Aliens or a tiger. Which do you think you could beat in a fight?" he asked.

You laughed before replying, "Hmm, depends. Are the aliens small or—"

"Tommy!" you heard a girly giggle and turned to see Tom with Nadia over his shoulder as they laughed and ran around the kitchen.

You quickly diverted your gaze to the coffee table. Forgetting about Harry's absurd question. All eyes were on you.

"What?" you asked when you finally looked up at your friends.

"Are you okay?" Harrison frowned from beside you before resting his head on your shoulder.

You let out a dry, quiet laugh, "Of course. As long as he's happy."

The looks of pity you received were almost as painful as the scene you witnessed moments ago.

'And do you tell her she's the most beautiful girl you've ever seen? An eternal love bullshit you know you'll never mean,'

"Premiere day!" Zendaya walked into your shared hotel room with a bright smile, Nadia following behind her.

You faked a smile as you applied another coat of mascara, "You girls look gorgeous."

Zendaya was in a red and black sequin gown. Hair down and heels on. Nadia was dressed in a maroon silk dress with a slit on the side. Black heels dawning her feet. Both had makeup and accessories on matching their attire.

You were in an emerald green gown with a slit running down your left leg. Silver heels and silver jewellery to match.

"So do you!" Nadia exclaimed as she sat on Zendaya's bed.

"Are the boys coming soo—" Zendaya got cut off by three loud knocks on the door.

"I'll get it!" Nadia jumped up and opened the door.

Tom was stood before her in a maroon suit. Matching her dress. Black dress shoes. Matching her heels. Glasses on and a bright smile.

You watched as Tom ran his eyes down Nadia's outfit, "Well, aren't you just the most beautiful girl in the world?" he planted a kiss on her lips as you witnessed with envy.

"Aw, Tommy. I love you."

"I love you more, darling." he grinned before looking behind her.

Heart wrenching pain struck you again.

You watched as his mouth fell open by the slightest bit. Eyes growing wider.

He quickly snapped out of his daze, placing a pearly white smile on, "You two look absolutely stunning."

You acknowledged his compliment with a curt nod.

Zendaya let out a laugh, "Yup. About to out do you at your own premiere."

'Remember when I believed you meant it when you said it first to me?'

"Green or white?" you held up both dresses against your body.

Tom looked up from his phone, "Both of them will look amazing on you, love."

You sighed, "I appreciate the compliment, but I am meeting Sebastian Stan tonight. Now is not the time for indecisiveness. One of them will make me look bad and I need to know which one."

The Infinity War premiere was in two hours and your anxiety was growing by the minute.

"C'mere." he motioned you towards him with a 'come hither' gesture as he sat on the edge of the hotel bed. You made your way towards him. Standing in between his legs as he wrapped his arms around your waist, "You are the most beautiful girl in the world. Absolutely gorgeous. You could make the ugliest dress look like something from a fairytale."

Your smile grew as he kissed your stomach, "Thank you, mi amor." you bent down and placed a peck on his forehead, leaning your head against his, you whispered, "Now, green or white?"

He chuckled and pecked your lips, "White."

You smiled before making your way to put on the white dress, "I love you."

"I love you more, darling."

'And now I'm picking her apart. Like cutting her down will make you miss my wretched heart. But she's beautiful, she looks kind. She probably gives you butterflies.'

"I don't like her." you murmured.

Zendaya chuckled, "Nadia? You barely know the girl."

You nodded, "And I don't like her. I don't like her giggles and her nickname for him. I don't like her hair."

You knew you were looking for things to dislike, but there weren't any. She was a fan of your music, she complimented you all the time. She was genuinely a great person.

She sighed, "No, you don't like the fact that she's dating Tom. If she wasn't, you wouldn't be saying any of this."

You rolled your eyes and glared at her, "Can you let me be angry?"

She laid herself down on your mattress, "Nope. If you wanna be angry, be angry at Tom. Nadia hasn't done anything to you. You're better than this."

"God, I hate your optimistic side sometimes." you threw a pillow at her.

She laughed, "One of us needs to be the optimist."

You sighed, "Do you think he misses me?"

"Yes." she replied without hesitation.

You sat up and furrowed your eyebrows, "What makes you say that?"

She let out a long breath, "You need to talk to him about that."

'I hope you're happy. I wish you all the best, really. Say you love her, baby. Just not like you loved me. And think of me fondly when your hands are on her. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier.'

"And you're dead." you dropped the controller on your lap as you defeated Harrison in Super Smash Bros again.

He huffed like a child, "Unfair. I taught you how to play, how'd you get better than me?"

"Actually, I taught her how to play. And I am ten times better than you." Tuwaine corrected him.

Harrison scoffed, "Whatever. Sweaty nerds, the both of you."

Nadia spoke up from Tom's lap, "Can I try?"

You nodded, "Who do you wanna go against?"

She chuckled, "I think I'll verse Harrison. Seeing as how Y/N just kicked your ass, I wanna at least have a chance."

Her comment made you laugh as you handed her the controller and watched them pick their characters. You watched as Tom set his phone down and focused on the screen where his girlfriend chose Pichu.

"Choose Kirby." Tom told her.

She furrowed her eyebrows, "Why? Pichu is so cute."

"Y/N always plays as Kirby and she always wins. With that stupid power absorbing ability." he chuckled as his eyes landed on you.

You felt your heart skip a beat at the small detail he remembered before you played it off with a light laugh, "Not my fault you thought Luigi could beat Kirby everytime we played."

'Ooo-ooo, ooo-ooo, ooo-ooo,'

You pressed on the keys of the piano in the boys' home. Singing your heart out. You still had your spare key and Harrison told you no one was home.

You were waiting for them to return from golfing so you could have your Sunday night dinners. It's been nearly four months since your breakup with Tom. Your album was due to be released on May twenty-first and you were letting the still evident pain fuel your lyrics.

"I hope you're happy, just not like how you were with me. I'm selfish, I know. I can't let you go. So find someone great, but don't find no one better. I hope you're happy, but don't be happier." you faded out the piano and pressed stop on the recording on your phone.

Writing down small notes about the song and things to tweak, your thoughts were quickly interrupted.

"I'm not."

Your head snapped up. Tom was leaning against the doorframe behind you. Tears escaping his eyes.

"T-Tom. I'm sorry. Haz told me the house was empty and I just started playing and- Wait. What did you say?" realization dawned on you.

He stepped closer and sat beside you on the piano bench, "I'm not happier. Hell, I'm not even happy." he gave a pathetic attempt at a laugh, staring straight at the black and white keys.

Your mind was trying to catch up with everything happening, trying to register his words, the state he was in. Grey sweats, black tee. Messy hair and red eyes.

"Why?"

He released a heavy sigh, "There's so many things you could be asking 'why' about. Why did I break up with you? Why am I with Nadia? Why am I not happy? Why the hell am I crying? Which one is it, Y/L/N?"

You blinked a few times, "All of them."

He sniffled and rubbed his face, "I felt like I was holding you back." he started, catching a glimpse of your confused expression, he continued, "You hadn't released any music in over year. There were so many articles saying that I was the reason that the biggest pop star in the world was quitting music. I didn't want to be the reason for that."

"You weren't and you aren't." you assured him.

He shrugged, "I just felt like you would do a lot better without me. And you are. Look at you, your fifth album is coming out next month." he nudged you with his shoulder, "I'm proud of you," he smiled.

"T-thank you."

He nodded, "Anyways, why am I with Nadia? Um, a few days after we broke up, I went to a friend's place to distract myself, as one does. She was there. She was a distraction. I never meant for it to get this far. You know, she actually asked me to be her boyfriend." he chuckled dryly to himself as you listened intently. "I guess, I thought it'd be easier to move on if I had something else to pour my love into?"

You nodded slowly, "Okay, I somewhat get that. So you really do love her?"

He quickly shook his head, "No, no, I don't. I mean, I can't. No one can truly love two people at once. And I think that answers the question of why I'm not happy." he paused and faced you completely, "I'm crying because hearing that song and hearing how evident your pain in it is, that will make anyone cry. I'm crying because I miss you and I miss us. I-I miss what we had and what we were. I miss your kisses and your stupid jokes that only you laugh at. I miss going on walks with you and Tess. I just miss you."

There was a long period of silence after his confession. You were trying to process all the information he was giving. He was cursing himself for being so straightforward. The longer it went without a response from you, the more anxious he got. He grabbed your hands, holding them to his lips.

"Please say something. Anything."

Déjà vu.

You swallowed, "You want honesty?" he nodded, "Okay, I was so mad at you. I-I was infuriated. Y-you told me you weren't ready to give a hundred percent of yourself and that you couldn't be in a relationship until you could give all of yourself to that person. Then a month later, you're with her. Making me feel like you just couldn't give yourself to me." you paused and shook your head, "You could've told me the truth. You should've told me the truth. We could've talked about it. We could've avoided months of awkward run ins and no communication." he nodded, still holding your hands in his, "I'm not gonna lie and say I don't miss you because I do, I miss you more than anything, but we shouldn't be doing this or saying these things while you're with her." you removed your hands from his.

He spent a moment looking down at his fingers. Releasing short breaths. "I don't want to be with her."

"But you are. And I don't want you to break up with her for me. Because that's not how things work, Tom. But you shouldn't stay with her either. Especially if this is how you're feeling. That's just unfair to her." you shook your head and felt your mind clear.

He nodded and met your gaze, "This is the end of us, huh?"

You shook your head, "I don't think there will ever be an end to us." you laughed dryly.

He agreed with a smile, "For forever and a day, remember?"

You nodded, "For forever and a day."

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ticketstomydaydreams · 3 years

Text

HOME

(All We Have: Part One)

Part Two

Colson x Female Reader

Summary: You and Colson are close friends and he invites you to move in to his house while you work on his record together

Word count: 1,580

Feels: Friendship Fluff for now

Warnings: Alcohol consumption, cursing, mentions of feeling depressed

Companion playlist:

Machine Gun Kelly - Home

Sia - Dressed in Black

The Beatles - With a Little Help from My Friends

A/N: Throughout the series there will be changes to the timing of real life events like the pandemic, the release of certain songs etc. There's certain things I want to incorporate into the series, like particular events in MGKs life and lyrics from songs, so some stuff will get moved around to fit in to the story ✌️

______

It had been a long evening working in Colson’s home studio, The Boulevard, with him and the gang on the upcoming Tickets to my Downfall album. To say your schedule was busy was an understatement, but Colson had insisted you get involved with the new material after the success of your work together on Hotel Diablo.

Composing music was your main gig, you had an ear for melody and your passion for writing meant you always had lyrics swirling around your head. You had a penchant for dark and melancholy lyrics, finding music to be a source of therapy for you. It was something you and Colson had instantly bonded over. He'd bugged you to list some of the stuff you'd written that he'd know and you had gained his professional respect immediately.

He always kept a close eye on your work, ever the supportive friend and had laid claim to your piece ‘Glass House’ as soon as he'd heard it.

______

2019

You were sitting crossed legged on the sofa in your lounge, gently strumming your guitar and gazing off into space and mumbling to yourself, as you worked out some lyrics in your head. Colson was lying on the floor by your feet, scrolling through his phone with earphones in, a blunt in his hand that he occasionally passed up to you. This was a common set up, you found it easier to write in the peace and quiet and Colson has gradually started hanging out at your place more when he needed to focus on his own writing.

"All alone in the glass house, lie awake til the sun's out, pink sky when you come down…"

"Throw me in the damn flames, Bury me in gold chains, throw me in the damn flames…"

You'd started singing out loud, occasionally stopping to scribble down lyrics and make adjustments, not noticing that Colson had removed his earbuds to listen to you

" Dude, that's hard, like, beautiful… " His comment made you jump slightly, you hadn't seen him propping himself up on his elbows, watching you intently "Sing that last bit again"

You blushed slightly, his opinion was always important to you, and started singing. He muttered to himself as you did, then pointed at you "Again!"

Letting out a little laugh and rolling your eyes, you sang again

"Throw me in the damn flames, bury me in gold chains, throw me in the damn flames"

Colson's voice met yours at the end of the line, rapping softly "I'm waiting on the rain to come and wash it all away"

You locked eyes, smiling and he sat upright. "Dude, Im'a need that hook! That spoke to me right there, I've think got something for it that I've been stuck on"

He looked so excited, your heart did a little flip. You'd seen that writing this album had taken it out of him, he'd been digging deep and really going through it emotionally. You could tell it was going to be raw and special from what you'd heard already.

He sat forward and moved the guitar from your lap so he could lean his arms on your knees and looked up at you shooting you puppy dog eyes with those baby blues "Pretty please Y/N"

You laughed and ruffled his hair, "Anything for you Col" Honestly, it'd be an honour to be part of such a personal project, you thought

He wrapped his arms round you and squeezed,

"You're a legend, kid. Get a sample recorded and send it to me!" He grabbed your guitar off the sofa and whipped back around, strumming a few chords as he carried on talking with his back to you, leaning against the sofa "This is gonna be fire, you always just hit the nail on the head, I swear it's like you're in my head sometimes"

You smiled, seeing the wave of motivation that had struck your friend. You felt so lucky to have a friend who was not only so inspiring, but one who 'got it', who understood that music was a form of release. Someone who recognised that it was important to feel these things, rather than encourage you to push dark thoughts away with toxic positivity.

He’d pushed to use your original samples on his record, but as much as you loved writing and singing, you were a behind the scenes kind of gal which had always suited you just fine. Naomi, a mutual friend of you both, came onboard to record them with him. A decision that turned out to be golden… 'Death in my Pocket' would be born not long after, with Naomi doing your lyrics such beautiful justice yet again, perfectly pairing with Colson's emotional rapping.

______

From then on Colson had kept you close to his recording. You'd been helping here and there with composition and notation, but your production skills were what was taking centre stage during the most recent sessions. You had a long list of projects you were working through, leaving you chained to your equipment most days and nights anyway so throwing more music into your workload didn't seem like much of a big deal. In all honesty, the chaos of Colson’s studio and the revolving door of personalities that were in and out constantly, made it one of the most fun places to be. You loved what you did for a living and it never really felt like work Even though the guys were a real handful at times, you kind of enjoyed being the studio 'Mami' as they often affectionately referred to you

Everything had wrapped up for the evening and the guys had migrated back into the house. You could hear from the raucous that the drinks must have started flowing freely. You were saving your work and packing up your stuff when Colson bursts back into the studio and throws himself in a chair, spinning it around with his arms in the air.

"You staying for drinks Y/N?" he grins at you, clearly hyper and in party mode

You let out a big sigh "Urgh, I'd love to but I have an early start tomorrow. I finally managed to get an apartment viewing. I swear I've looked at a hundred places now, they get snapped up so quickly.. I've only got a few weeks left on my lease as well"

“Ah, that sucks kid” Colson empathises, spinning his chair again before an idea strikes him “Wait! Why don’t you move in here for a bit until you find a place? The guest room is pretty much your room anyway, the amount you crash here”

You laugh “This is true, that mattress is so much better than mine! Aw Col, that would honestly be so helpful, the stress of finding a place when I’m this busy is killing me. I don't know… You sure the guys won’t mind?”

Colson scoffs “Why would they mind? You practically live here anyway” he teases “I’m sure they’ll be just as stoked as I am at the thought of you joining the madhouse for a while”

Before you have a chance to respond, he stands up and throws his arms around you, squashing you into him tightly “That’s it decided Roomie. Another song in the bag and a new housemate, plenty to celebrate tonight!”

Wriggling out of his tight grasp, you laugh and in a deep voice shout “let’s goooooo” mocking his signature catchphrase. He flips you his middle finger and says “Kitchen, now”

Once you’re in the kitchen, Colson heads to get you a drink and grabs one himself. Appearing back at your side, he passes you your beer and then shouts out to the rest of the group,

��YO, meet our latest housemate, Y/N is moving in. LET’S FUCKING GOOOOO”

Everyone in the kitchen lets out a big cheer, clearly pleased as he said they would be. Colson bends down and picks you up, swinging you around in a circle, spilling your drinks all over the both of you as you shout his name in mock annoyance, between giggles.

“I hope you know what you’re letting yourself in for” Rook laughs, clinking his drink against your now empty beer bottle once your feet are back on the floor

“It’ll be good to have another pair of hands around here, looking after you lot” Ashleigh chimes in, laughing and slapping Slim away as he pulls her hood up over her head, covering her eyes

It had been 5 years since you'd made the decision to move to LA, barely knowing a soul. You'd worked several jobs, jumped from place to place, worked your ass off to catch your break in the music business, sometimes feeling like the grind would never get you anywhere.

There had been times where you felt like you couldn't carry on, aching from trying to keep pace. The dream had felt like it was turning into a nightmare, as you tried to make ends meet, feeling so lonely in this enormous city.. but eventually you'd made these amazing friends who made you feel so safe and loved.

Now, there were times you had to pinch yourself just to make sure it was all real.

As you shake off some of the beer that's dripping from your hands, you look around the kitchen. Taking in the crazy, loveable bunch before you, your new housemates, you are filled with gratitude. You finally felt like you were exactly where you were supposed to be…

Home.

______

❌❌ Lace up!

#mgk fluff #colson baker x reader #mgk imagine #mgk x reader #machine gun kelly imagine #colson baker imagine #machine gun kelly x reader #colson x reader #mgk fic #machine gun kelly #fandom #fanfic #fanfiction #mgk fanfiction #colson baker

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tinyboxxtink · 3 years

Text

"Here Without You"

Alright yes I know I should be writing a new chapter for SIMAM, but I have had this friggin idea in my head for SO long, and finally I had a reason to write it.

It's an entry for @storiesofsvu Bingo! The square is "Rainy Day", and I love this song. It's probably one of my favorite songs of all time. It's "Here Without You" by 3 Doors Down. I highly recommend listening to it before during or after reading.

I hope you like it. I think it's just the right amount of angst and fluff. <3

Also I'm gonna put my tag list on here, if you would not like to be tagged in my OS stuff or anything please let me know! Or if you would like to be added!

Tag List

@agentcable

@madamsnape921

@lolliepopsicle

@chasingeverybreakingwave

@milkshqke

@wanniiieeee

@gibbs274

@sassyada

@aprildecker-blog

@bookishfanfic

@stars-in-the-skies-world

@stars-trash-18

@omgsuperstarg

@objection-argumentative

@thatesqcrush

@shittanyy

@mrsrafaelbarba

@word-scribbless

@storiesofsvu

@believinghurts

----------------

It was pouring down rain as you sat in your office at SVU, everyone else had left. All the lights were off except for your desk lamp and the light from your computer as you typed up reports. Suddenly a ZOOM notification popped up:

RAFAEL BARBA WOULD LIKE TO START A ZOOM CALL

You instantly hit ACCEPT, and there was your boyfriend’s beautiful face on your computer screen.

A hundred days have made me older

Since the last time that I saw your pretty face

A thousand lies have made me colder

And I don't think I can look at this the same

But all the miles that separate

Disappear now when I'm dreaming of your face

“Hola mi amor,” His voice sounded like an angel’s chorus, you felt like you hadn’t heard it in a million years. Though to be real, it probably had only been a few days.

“Baby!” You beamed at him. He looked as tired as you felt, the exhaustion thinly veiled through a beautiful smile.

“What are you still doing at the office, carino?” He asked in concern. “I tried calling your cell, and you didn’t answer,”

You wanted to tell him the truth; that you were working long days and nights just so you didn’t have to go home to an empty apartment. The halls of Rafael’s apartment echoed with memories of you and him, just painful reminders that he wasn’t there. You had reluctantly accepted his offer to ‘watch’ his apartment when he had decided to take a ‘sabbatical’ from New York for a while. You told him it was unnecessary, he didn’t need to leave. He was acquitted of all charges, but he felt as if he was being judged by everyone, so he had exiled himself before they could.

“...Just waiting for the rain to stop,” You lied, pointing out the window at the storm outside. It was partially true, you didn’t want to walk to the subway in that mess.

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you, baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight it's only you and me, yeah

“Ah, I see,” He nodded, pretending to believe you.

He missed you so much, he kicked himself everyday for leaving New York. Mostly you. He should have asked you to come with him, not to watch his apartment. The apartment didn’t need ‘taking care of’, he did. But he didn’t want to admit that to you, so he had just taken off. He wasn’t used to having someone to be accountable to, he was used to just running away from things when they got bad.

The miles just keep rollin'

As the people leave their way to say hello

I've heard this life is overrated

But I hope that it gets better as we go, oh yeah, yeah

“I miss you,” You finally admitted, trying not to cry.

You didn’t want him to see you cry, you didn’t want him to feel guilty for leaving you. You knew he needed time, it was traumatic what he went through. Not just the trial, but the actual act of mercy killing an infant. You knew it was one of the hardest things he had ever had to do, and he was almost punished for it. You were pretty sure he was punishing himself for it, in lieu of the judicial system doing it.

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you, baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight, girl, it's only you and me

“...I miss you too,” He finally answered after a very long pause.

He could hear the tears in your voice. Your words cut him like a knife, even though he knew you had no intention of them doing so. The guilt of leaving you just built as he looked longingly at you through the computer screen.

“Where are you?” You asked, trying to change the subject. You grabbed your thermos of coffee and took a gulp, hoping to hide the tears dripping down your cheeks. You brushed them away subtly as you put the thermos down.

“Jersey,” He suddenly began to smile, revealing the real reason he was calling.

Everything I know, and anywhere I go (Oh whoa)

It gets hard but it won't take away my love (Oh whoa)

And when the last one falls

When it's all said and done

It gets hard but it won't take away my love, whoa, oh, oh

“Jersey?!” You almost yelled. You glanced at the cleaning people who had momentarily looked up at your outburst, but went back to their mopping soon enough.

“Yes, I’ll be home tomorrow night,” He continued to smile at the fact that your own smile was growing by the second.

“Really?!” You tried not to squeal. After four long months of talking through a screen or a phone, you’d finally be able to see the love of your life in person. And hug him. And kiss him. And do everything you had dreamed of while lying in his bed alone.

“Yes, mi amor,” He chuckled at your excitement. “And Y/N?”

“Yes, Raffi?”

“...I’m sorry for leaving like I did,” He said softly.

“...What?” That was the last thing you expected for him to say, you blinked at him in disbelief.

“I should have never left you,” He looked at you with his puppy dog eyes. He wanted to do this now, so when he saw you tomorrow you could be all smiles and lovey dovey.

“Oh, Rafael,” You sighed, putting a hand to the screen. “I get it, really I do,”

“I know you do,” Rafael nodded. You were the most understanding person he had ever met, it was one of the reasons he fell in love with you so fast. “But it doesn’t mean I should have done it. And I swear I will never leave you again after this,"

“...Well, it’s over now,” You gave him a small smile. “Or it will be, tomorrow,”

“Yes, tomorrow,” He smiled once again, looking out at the rain outside his own window. It was almost as if you were in the same room. Almost.

“I love you, Rafael,” Your soft voice knocked him back to reality. He turned back to the screen and gave you a loving grin.

“Te amo mi amor,” He kissed his hand and put it to the screen before ending the call.

You shut down your computer and gathered your things anxiously. Rain be damned, the sooner you got back to Rafael’s apartment the sooner you could sleep, and the sooner he’d be home.

And then you’d never have to be without him again.

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still on my lonely mind

I think about you, baby

And I dream about you all the time

I'm here without you, baby

But you're still with me in my dreams

And tonight, girl, it's only you and me, yeah

Oh girl, oh oh

#rafael barba #rafael barba angst #rafael barba fluff #rafael barba x you #rafael barba x reader #law and order svu #law and order svu fanfiction #rafael barba imagine

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pseudomenudo · 3 years

Text

I have decided to create a challenge for Pride Month.

Let’s all reflect on the things that have shaped and affected us as LGBTQ+ individuals. I challenge you to answer this question: What’s an LGBTQ+ (theme/symbolism/mentions of LGBTQ+ anything!) song, movie, piece of art, book, poem, quote, ANYTHING, that you like? Why do you like it? Feel free to share it all in your response to this post! Even YouTube vids, spotify links, whatever! Anything that shows us your fave stuff regarding LGBTQ+. I’ll go first.

POETRY:

A poem by my favorite poet Walt Whitman: “Though biographers continue to debate Whitman's sexuality, he is usually described as either homosexual or bisexual in his feelings and attractions.” (reference: https://bookshop.org/books/poems-9781519702807/9781519702807)

Song of the Open Road:

Afoot and light-hearted I take to the open road,

Healthy, free, the world before me, The long brown path before me, leading wherever I choose. Henceforth I ask not good-fortune—I am good- fortune, Henceforth I whimper no more, postpone no more, need nothing, Strong and content, I travel the open road. The earth—that is sufficient, I do not want the constellations any nearer, I know they are very well where they are, I know they suffice for those who belong to them. Still here I carry my old delicious burdens, I carry them, men and women—I carry them with me wherever I go, I swear it is impossible for me to get rid of them, I am filled with them, and I will fill them in return. You road I travel and look around! I believe you are not all that is here, I believe that much unseen is also here.

A large part of my sexuality and my freedom to express my sexuality healthily is thanks to Walt Whitman. Not only did he save my life once, he helped me understand myself.

ART:

As for art. Frida Kahlo was a great inspiration for me in terms of female sexuality, loving both men and women, and thinking of sexuality as more than sex and attraction. I also have a strong desire to become a mother one day, as she did. I am also terrified of infertility, as she was.

“While many maintain she had sexual relationships with both men and women, what is true is that she considered sexuality as something that went beyond mere intercourse. It spoke of creation, life, and, of course, her wish to conceive and become a mother. This obsession was a constant in her life and was beautifully immortalized in the bright shapes and colors of her canvases.” (reference: https://culturacolectiva.com/art/frida-kahlo-sexuality-paintings)

TW: Blood, nudity, infertility, hospital bed, childbirth

MOVIE:

TW for the movie: sex scenes, some sexuality, use of the n word, drug use, brief violence, and language throughout.

I very much enjoyed the movie Moonlight. Not only was it filmed where I live, I also went to a showing for it near the place it was filmed. When it came out, I was overjoyed, and loved the themes it showed in the movie. The element of water has always been a recurring one in my own life. Moonlight handles difficult topics, such as incarceration, death, prejudice, racism, homosexuality, toxic masculinity, growing up in poverty, familial relationships, homophobia, AIDS, father-son relationships and dynamics, black culture, how black gay men are viewed, love and relationships, separations, machismo, anxiety, etc. in a beautiful, graceful manner. The main characters father is from Cuba, and speaks of black people and black culture in cuba. This is something that isn't spoken of as much as it should be. The afro-cuban culture in cuba is important, and a part of Cuban people's history and ancestry. As a Cuban woman, I was proud to hear about the experience the father shared, not necessarily because of the experience itself, but because people will hear it and learn. Things must change. Many of these themes are things I struggled with in my own life. I felt a sort of kinship with the movie and its characters.

Have some clips of the film:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7D0T4ivCsF4

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z6yMItXePG8&ab_channel=T-Manfilm

MUSIC:

I think I heard this song when I was around eleven years old. I think so many people know it already, it's very popular, but it was the first song I heard that really expressed feeling love for someone of the same sex. When I tried explaining to my mother how I felt inside, in terms of my sexuality and attraction to the members of the same sex, I showed her the youtube video of the song. It was a very interesting experience lol. Some lyrics I felt I related to were:

"Mother looking at me Tell me what do you see? Yes, I've lost my mind Daddy looking at me Will I ever be free? Have I crossed the line?"

And

"And I'm all mixed up, feeling cornered and rushed They say it's my fault, but I want her so much Want to fly her away,"

Spotify Link: https://open.spotify.com/track/4bJygwUKrRgq1stlNXcgMg

Music Video:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8mGBaXPlri8

QUOTE/BOOK

A quote that recently touched my heart was:

“In the darkness, two shadows, reaching through the hopeless, heavy dusk. Their hands meet, and light spills in a flood like a hundred golden urns pouring out of the sun.” from The Song of Achilles by Madeline Miller

When I read this, I thought, “This is what matters when you are with the one you love. This is all that should matter.”

Have a summary of the book from Goodreads.com (one of my favorite websites for organizing my books. If you want to follow me there, send me a message or ask and I’ll give it to you):

“Greece in the age of heroes. Patroclus, an awkward young prince, has been exiled to the court of King Peleus and his perfect son Achilles. By all rights their paths should never cross, but Achilles takes the shamed prince as his friend, and as they grow into young men skilled in the arts of war and medicine their bond blossoms into something deeper - despite the displeasure of Achilles' mother Thetis, a cruel sea goddess. But then word comes that Helen of Sparta has been kidnapped. Torn between love and fear for his friend, Patroclus journeys with Achilles to Troy, little knowing that the years that follow will test everything they hold dear.Profoundly moving and breathtakingly original, this rendering of the epic Trojan War is a dazzling feat of the imagination, a devastating love story, and an almighty battle between gods and kings, peace and glory, immortal fame and the human heart.”

And that’s it for me! I challenge ALL OF YOU to continue this and share your own. Feel free to reblog this and tag your own friends and mutuals to complete this challenge! Let’s share with each other the beautiful pieces of work that have inspired us as members of the LGBTQ+ community.

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sun-sakura · 3 years

Text

[OUR PROMISE] [a sad hananene playlist] [Pt. 1]

|Hanako and Yashiro got separated. years later, Hanako returns, only to find that Yashiro has forgotten about him...|

[You can also found it on my accounts on spotify (sakura_army) and youtube ]

[MANGA SPOILERS]

[LOOK AT THE END AND VOTE FOR THE NEXT THREAD]

A THREAD

| | |

* * *

1 - BTS - The truth untold

"It's my fate, dont smile on me, light on me, because i can't come to you, there is no name you can call me"

[It was the time of severance. Hanako was about to disappear from that world. In the last few minutes he had left, he held Yashiro tightly to him one last time, confessing his feelings to her."

2 - Billie Eilish ft. Khalid - Lovely

"i hope someday i'll make it out of here, even if it takes all night or a hundred years"

["someday i will be able to come back to you, until then, please wait for me, don't forget me"]

3 - Alex and Sierra - Little do you know

"i'll wait, my love is here and here to stay"

["i swear i'll wait for you all my life, but you have to promise me that one day you'll come back" "of course i will, there is no force that can separate me from you forever. I love you, Yashiro, remember, this is not goodbye, we'll see each other again"]

4 - Sasha Sloan - Dancing with your ghost

"i put the record on, wait 'til i heard our song, every night im dancing with your ghost"

["i still can't believe you're gone, it's been over a week already. I miss you, please come back, Amane]

5 - Taylor Swift - Last Kiss

"i never thought we'd have a last kiss"

[two months later]

["you know, i still remember the cold warmth of your hand and the way you constantly enjoyed teasing me. You were so annoying, but no one ever looked at me the way you did]

6 - LeeSora ft. SUGA - Song Request

"in my room this silence and the sound of my lonely heart..im going crazy"

[6 months later]

["No, it's okay, i swear i'm not forgetting about you. I just have to keep reminding myself of our promise"]

7 - Briell Von Hugel - the one that got away [cover]

"in another life, i would be your girl, we'd keep all our promises, be us against the world"

["maybe you will never come back, just as I feared...or maybe, i just imagined everything from the beginning? Nobody remembers you, and i don't even remember your face anymore...I think it's time for me to move on, im sorry...I hope we can meet again, in another life..."].

8 - Halsey - Sorry

"and i'm sorry to my unknown lover [...] someone will love you, but someone isn't me"

["Yashiro-senpai, i like you! Please go out with me!" "i like you too, Kou-kun]

9 - Annapantsu - Once upon a dicember [cover]

"far away, long ago, burning dim as an ember, things my heart used to know, things it yearns to remember, and a song someone sings, once upon a dicember"

["Is something wrong, Nene?" "It's strange Kou, there's not a day when i think i'm missing something, but no matter how hard i try i just can't remember" "now that I think about it, i think you once told me you made a promise to someone" "a promise?" ]

10 - Shawn Mendes - Wonder (acoustic)

"right before i close my eyes, the only thing is on my mind, been dreamin' that you feel it too, i wonder what is like to be loved by you"

["The big day is finally here Yashiro, it's been two years, but i'll finally get to see you again. I can't wait to be able to hold you in my arms again, i've missed you so much..."]

#hanako x nene #jibaku shoujo hanako kun #hanako x yashiro #hanako san #toilet bound hanako kun #hanako x yashiro manga #tbhk manga #tbhk aesthetic #tbhk headcanons #tbhk playlist #hananene #hananene playlist #music #anime #anime playlist

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outerbankslut · 4 years

Text

Confessions... JJ Maybank (ptersparkers’ Writing Challenge)

Summary • You had been dating JJ for the for a few months after meeting him a year before and during a Kegger one night he gains the courage to confess something.

Warnings • Underage Drinking. Swearing. Mentions of smoking weed. JJ being hella cheesy and cute. Minimal violence (punching). Makeout scene at the end and insinuated smut after.

Word Count • 3.2k (Imagine)

Masterlist

(GIF isn’t mine, let me know if it’s yours)

BEER ROCKED DANGEROUSLY over the side of the red solo cup held in JJ Maybank's hand as he bobbed from side to side within the crowd of sweaty, buzzed teenagers. He was 7 beers and one joint deep and it had barely been 2 hours. But that was JJ for you. Getting hammered at parties and hooking up with random tourons would normally be his plan for the night. Until he met you. His life drastically changed with you around. He stayed round your house, you hung out on the boat together, you surfed with each other, comforted each other. You both enjoyed each other's presence. You felt safe in each other's arms.

Eventually JJ asked the million dollar question, not marriage though. Yet. He asked you to be his girlfriend on a boat ride, just the two of you as the sun set behind you. It was surprisingly romantic for the Maybank boy which you had told him. He simply kissed you on the lips and said when there was the right motivation for him to, which was wanting to spend every moment with you, he could be as romantic as he wanted.

JJ took the rim of the cup to his lips and let the beer wash down his throat as he turned, looking around him, searching for one person. Until he found you. His eyes landed on your head of hair standing by the keg chatting with John B gripping a similar red solo cup to JJs own. Except you weren't stumbling from side to side like him.

"Ellie!" He called out as he pushed his way through the herd of people and beamed as he saw you turn around.

"Took you long enough to get here."

As soon as he reached you he wrapped his arms around you tightly like a koala bear and nestled his head on your chest. You laughed at your boyfriend wrapping your arms around him, the vibrations coursing through your body to his as he inhaled your soothing scent. He felt so lucky to hear your laugh all the time. That melodic, enchanting laugh.

"How much have you had drink JJ?"

You asked. He pulled away counting on his fingers and held up three with a goofy grin before saying, "Five beers."

You chose not to comment on his maths considering he was already hammered so it wasn't his fault.

John B piped up from behind you, "I think he's had six or seven. And I saw him smoking a joint early on."

"Thanks, John B." You smiled, before you took JJs hand leading him over to a log that didn't have any people sitting on it. "How about we sit down, J?"

Then you felt a gentle tug on your hand as JJ stood still in the sand begrudgingly. "No, I wanna go dance."

"You look like you're about to fall flat on your face, J. Are you sure?"

"Yeah. But can you come with me? Please Ellie belly." He begged, pouting and you got so caught up in his wide innocent stare that you found yourself nodding. If JJ was there you would happily do anything with him.

He pulled you into the crowd as you made sure he wouldn't fall over from his inebriated state.

His blond hair was held back by a navy blue bandana but strays still brushed against the soft skin of his face in the wind. He quickly put his arms around your waist quickly as if to say you were taken. Both of you completely content as you put your own wound round his shoulders. It wasn't even a slow song playing as you both swayed in the moonlight but you acted like it was anyway.

After a while it got too much within the masses of people surrounding you so you left it with JJ following after you.

"Hey, where you going?" He asked his eyes widening at the thought of you leaving him. He didn't want you to ever leave him. The sight melted your heart. If this was your ex he wouldn't even have asked. And would've just stayed dancing, probably with other girls as though he didn't have a girlfriend at all.

"I'm just going to go further up the beach. Where it's quieter. You coming?"

"Yeah." He'd go with you anywhere. "Of course, I'll go with you."

You smiled and walked down the beach, your feet sinking into the sand with each step you took.

The waves were louder where you were. Mainly because there wasn't music blasting right in your ear or the loud chatter and yells of Pogues partying.

You both laid next to each other in a small area on the sand listening the water crashing against the shore not caring about the sand that most likely covered you head to toe.

"Hey look, El." He pointed his finger into the sky towards a cluster of stars. "That one looks like a dick." He smirked. "That's probably like the size of mine as well. You think?"

"Mmm, I think maybe a grain of sand is more comparable." You looked at him with with a teasing smirk and he sent you a glare. "Anyway, I don't even see—wait nevermind I see it now." You paused for a second laughing.

"What?" He asked poking your shoulder.

"Its—It's the big dicker."

JJ snickered at the pun and you fist bumped before taking his hand in yours. Eventually the laughter faded to a comfortable silence with JJ rubbing circles on the back of your hand and you holding onto his like your life depended on it. JJs touch was soft and kind and yours was reassuring and gentle.

All of the sudden JJ turned over in the sand facing you as you turned to face him too.

He cleared his throat before speaking, your faces only millimetres apart. "El, there's—there's something I've wanted to say to you about... for a while now."

He was slightly sobered up now at the thought of what he was about to say. It was big for JJ. Never once had he felt love towards someone other than his four friends. His hookups meant nothing and his family—well that wasn't love in the slightest. So for him to feel safe and comfortable with someone was rare and it was a big deal.

You laid in anticipation thinking about what he could be saying. There could've been a hundred things. But one thing popped up that made you feel giddy inside. Your mind was saying no. There was no way he was about to say that. If anything he was probably about to break up with you. But you swiftly made sure to push that to the back of your mind. Though you didn't know what to think at his long pause as he tried to find the words.

"Is it—is it something bad or—"

"No, no. Just don't freak out or anything cause I don't think I could handle that."

You pinched your eyebrows in confusion but nodded nonetheless with an encouraging smile.

"I don't know whether you feel the same way or anything, but I think—"

And just like that JJ was interrupted as John B ran over laughing. "Guys Popes about to do a Keg stand."

You looked bewildered to say the least. From your short time knowing the Pogues you knew pope rarely drank. JJ huffed quietly under his breath sending a scowl into the back of John B who was going back to the epicentre of the beach party. You pulled JJ up his hand which you hadn't let go of yet and paused holding him back for a second.

"Hey? Um, what was it you wanted to say?"

"Nothing it doesn't matter." JJ sighed and gave a thin lipped smile. The atmosphere was ruined now. He wanted it to be perfect. He wanted it to mean something. But it didn't feel right to say in that moment.

You nodded not convinced but let it go. If it was that important he would have said wouldn't he?

AT TWO AM the party was still going and JJ had sobered up more, not wanting to be drunk if he was to try and tell you by the end of the night. He just needed to build up the courage again to say those words he'd been so starved of most of his life.

A lot of the Tourons and Kooks had cleared off going back to their holiday homes or mansions while the Pogues partied till dawn. Since they had no obligations, no one to answer to, nothing to lose.

Pope was completely drunk from the keg stand and Kiara was babysitting him for the rest of the night while trying to stop him from drinking even more.

JJ had strayed from you a few minutes before going over to talk to John B next to the campfire that was roaring while you manned the practically empty keg. You were sitting sipping on your own beer when you felt someone sit next to you and turned to see a boy who looked a little older than you.

"Hey baby." He put his arm around you as you grimaced attempting to push it off. "What do you say we get out of here and go back to my place?"

JJ was facing away from you for a second before John Bs face contorts to confusion and the blond turns to see the boy with his arm around you, not him. Just some random guy.

"Um, no thanks. I have a boyfriend." You push's his arm off standing up and walking away until he grabs your arm tightly.

JJs grip on the plastic cup crumpled it and he dropped it to the floor as he stormed towards the scene quickly with a furious stride in his step.

"That was a little rude." His breath hit your ear and the intoxication obvious as you winced at the pressure on your arm. You looked from him to his calloused hand placing extra pressure on your arm probably leaving bruises. And then gritted your teeth in annoyance as you hissed, "Let go, asshole."

"You heard what she said asshole let go of her." The voice of your boyfriend rung out when the guy didn't relent and even having the audacity to let out a low chuckle.

"What are you her boyfriend?"

You saw the blaze in his eyes and shook your head. "JJ it's fi—"

"Yeah, actually I am. So I suggest if you've got any sense left in that pea sized brain of yours, you let go of her." JJs fists tightened slightly and his jaw clenched.

The guy let go of your arm with a scoff before pushing you forward roughly towards JJ.

"Fucking slut." He spat in your direction and turned to leave but the fire in JJs eyes only grew.

His arms caught you as quickly as they abandoned you when he gently pushed you away from him and ran at the guy tackling him into the sand. People who had gathered around gasped in shock. Though, what was shocking about JJ Maybank getting into a fight at a party?

You went to go forward but John B pulled you back shaking his head as he moved forward to pull JJ away from the boy who he had punched twice.

John B pulled his friend off putting a hand on his chest to stop him running towards the guy groaning on the floor. Luckily the guy ran off quickly not causing anymore trouble as you hurriedly stepped towards the boy grabbing his shoulders and looking over his face and body.

"Are you okay? Did he hurt you?"

"No, I'm fine. Are you okay?" He said as he looked at the red print left on your arm his hands grazing over it.

"I'm fine, J. You didn't have to do that."

"I didn't have to—Are you serious? Of course I did. He wasn't letting go of you. I wasn't just gonna stand there and watch."

"I—I could've handled it. I don't want you getting hurt just because you think I'm a damsel in distress who can't help herself."

"You're not just a damsel in distress you're my girlfriend. I did it because you shouldn't have to go through that, we're a package deal. I protect you and you protect me."

Your face softened. "J, I understand and thankyou, I just hate the thought of you getting hurt because of me."

"Well deal with it cause as long as we're together I'll take any punches thrown your way because I love you so fucking much!"

JJ let out a breath as he realised what he'd just said and his eyes widened. You stood frozen as the words spilled out, your feet stuck to the ground, your hands trapped at your side.

"You—you love me?"

JJ got over the initial shock of what he said and nodded furiously. "Of course, you're the most amazing girl I've ever met. And the fact that you care too just makes me love you more. I'll scream I love you from the rooftops if I have to. So that guys like that know that you're my girlfriend."

The boy suddenly got an idea as he spotteda red metal stand stuck in in the sand behind you. He sent you a grin before rushing over to the object climbing up holding his hands in the air and wobbling slightly before yelling to the crowd of Pogues. "Can I have your attention please, everyone?"

Your eyes widened at the realisation of what he was about to do and you held in a breath.

"In case you didn't already know I'm in love with Ellie Reed that girl right there. And she's my girlfriend so if anyone here was thinking about going near her. Think again, she's off limits!"

Your cheeks flushed red and your lip was quivering now while a tear trickled down your cheek slowly.

The boy you loved with your whole heart, loved you back. He jumped down from the stand and before he got a chance to walk any further you ran up to him jumping into his arms that he quickly outstretched. He twirled you around once you were safely in his embrace and you felt like you were on top of the world.

"You don't have to feel the same way. I just needed you to know." He whispered in your ear, he was honest and he was scared. Scared that once he said that you'd run away cause you wouldn't feel the same way. He was reluctant to even admitting this in fear of rejection. But sometimes you just need to say fuck you to your fears and go for it.

You shook your head pulling back and wiping a small tear that was in a puddle on your cheek. As he set you back on the sand you lightly hit his chest.

"You going soft on me Maybank? Oh wait no you already were before." You teased him but he didn't care. You wanted to make sure he knew exactly how you felt back. So you did.

"I love you too, JJ. Dating you has made me feel like I actually have someone who I could go to for anything. You're so supportive. And the way I've seen you with your friends, you'd do anything for them. And I admire that so much."

You took his bandana in your hand and said, "And I especially love this cute ass bandana on you." You grinned winking at him. JJ made a mental note to wear it more often. "You're an amazing person and boyfriend and I don't think words even express my love for you."

He beamed at you and he wrapped his arms around you, his own eyes watering slightly and he pressed a chaste kiss to your forehead. It felt like he was high. But he didn't need weed for the type of high he was on right then.

THE DOOR WAS pushed open as you and JJ made your way through the entryway to JJs room lips locked. His hands slipped down to your waist grazing over the end seams of your top attempting to pull it up though it was tightly held on your body.

"Why is your top so hard to get off?" He grunted in frustration.

"I don't know. I'll just take it off." You pulled it over your head, throwing it to the side it hitting the floor and he stood still for a second.

"God, you're so fucking hot." He breathed out before stripping himself of his baggy tank top and pressed you up against the door, it slamming shut in the process. You smiled against his lips suddenly feeling dizzy and euphoric as his hands roamed your body. You gripped his hair tightly, your hands placed on the back of his neck as he deepened the kiss.

You felt his hands tighten around your bare waist when you moved your hands from his neck down the sides of his stomach lightly brushing over his abs before you reached the button of his board shorts. You unbuttoned them hastily and he kicked them off not wanting to take his attention from you.

Then his hands went down to the skirt you wore. Pulling at the waist band before he pulled it down, his hands brushing over the red lace situated beneath.

He broke the kiss and began trailing them along your jaw before whispering in your ear. "Jump."

You did exactly that feeling a tingling sensation at his hold on your thighs pinning you against the wooden door as you wrapped your arms around his broad shoulders.

He trailed kisses further down your jaw before he carried you towards the bed and threw you down on the covers. You stared up at him his heavy breath hitting your face as he leaned down trailing the soft down your neck first and then down your chest. You were letting out soft moans and calling out his name as he sucked on your skin nicking it with his teeth leaving reddish marks left and right around your chest.

When he moved down to the lining of your laced underwear the creak of a door sounded through the room.

"JJ I—" Pope froze his eyes wide as he saw his friend on top of you only in your underwear. JJ quickly moved his body over yours.

"Jesus Christ, Pope."

"I'll—I'll leave you guys to it. Uh, have fun? And sorry."

Pope quickly exited the room looking mortified at the image of his friend having sex while Kiara and John B standing outside realised what had happened and laughed to themselves.

JJ let out a chuckle while you huffed. The thought of his friends being just outside the room was slightly unnerving as you realised the amount of times you had moaned JJs name. But just JJs touch took that feeling away. His head has rested on your chest before he sat up looking to you full of lust.

"Why don't we just finish what we started then."

Note • So I was on the fence about posting this for a while cause I just wasn’t that happy with how it ended up but I went back and edited it today and I’m much happier with how it turned out. Like it was 1.4k words before I edited it and then bam like 3k words. Oops. But the main part I was worried about was the last part cause I’ve literally just written the like 2 kisses in my other imagines. Hopefully it doesn’t cringe anyone to death. Also thankyou @ptersparkers for making the writing comp cause I kinda got out of my comfort zone writing the last part. (Also your study sessions series helped me kinda). Also this is the post that says about it if you wanted to participate :)

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likefacesaretohearts · 4 years

Text

Close in Quarantine

Category - friends to lovers trope

Warnings - smut, unprotected sex

Word count: 1486

Hi y'all! This is my first fic on this page so I'd love to hear your thoughts on it. I want this to be a place to have fun and where WOC can see themselves reflected in fics. Much love!

Chris was saying the usual goodbyes and thank yous that occur at the end of an interview. Because everything was being done over Zoom and the video lagged even with the best of WiFi, there was the awkward overlapping of him and the interviewer talking at the same time. Once he was in the clear and was sure the call was off, he let out a big sigh and closed his laptop.

"I swear they ask the same questions every press run I do,” he said.

You emerge from the kitchen with a cold beer in hand, finally able to go into the living room. Chris didn't want you wandering around in the background while he was on the Zoom call because he knew that if anyone caught a glimpse of you, social media and the gossip blogs would be alight with rumors of Chris Evans and His Mysterious New Flame. In reality, you weren't together. Neither of you were really sure what you were, but there was certainly an ember of attraction there that had been building since you started quarantining together.

“Why don't you let me ask you the questions then,” you tease as you plop down on the couch near him.

“I have to polish up my singing voice, maybe work on my choreography first, huh?” he said.

You were a music journalist, so you spent your work days talking to rockstars and the most polished pop stars about their lives and music then cranking out long form articles for their fans and haters alike to read. Chris came over and sat next to you on the couch with his arm resting on the back of the couch behind you. Being this close to him made you nervous but you didn't mind...it was a bit of a rush. He’d started singing a song purposefully off key, taking the beer from your hand and using it as a microphone.

“You are no Mariah Carey, sir,” you said, trying not to give him the satisfaction of cracking a smile..

He knocked back some sips of your beer and you try to grab it from him to no avail. He playfully moves the bottle around and holds it in the air, using his tall stature as an advantage.

“We’ve been quarantined together for three weeks, your germs are my germs at this point,” he said.

“Bull shit that is not how that works,” you said laughing.

You finally get a hold of his hand with the beer in it, but suddenly the vibe changes. Chris, with his scruffy quarantine beard and slightly grown out hair, had grabbed hold of you and pulled you into him in a bear hug in one swift movement. Over the past few weeks living together during the pandemic, you’d gotten to know each other much better than you had when the world was “normal.” You'd seen each other first thing in the morning and gotten used to speaking freely with each other without fear of sounding weird, as it turned out you both were. You had been a friend of Scott's for a few months, and met Chris through him while he was filming a movie in L.A. After meeting him during a night of drinking at Scott’s place, you hit it off but were only casual friends...until the rona hit.

One night in the beginning of it all, you were lonely in your apartment when Scott convinced you it'd be a good idea to quarantine with his sexy ass brother that you hardly knew.

“Y/N, it's the perfect idea! You're both single and I'm in Massachusetts with our family,” Scott said. “There's no reason you should drive yourselves crazy quarantining alone when you could just live together —just until all this is over.”

Your family was miles away in Texas and your L.A. friends had their own thing going on, so you took him up on the offer, totally skipping the steps of even establishing that you like each other to living together during a global pandemic. The first day was a bit awkward as it was natural to be — you were in someone who was two steps up from a stranger’s home and self conscious because, again, he was fine as hell – but that night the two of you sat on his living room floor and bonded.

“If we tell each other our darkest and most embarrassing parts of our lives, the awkwardness is gone,” Chris had said. So you spent 5 hours talking about the deepest hurts and the greatest joys of your lives. From then on, it felt like you had known each other for years. You even got close with Dodger, who at first wanted nothing to do with you or your cat that you’d brought with you, Mocha.

You relaxed into Chris’ arms, letting your desire to be close to him take precedence over the practical side of you that didn't want to potentially ruin the dynamic you'd built. Chris, almost as if it was instinctual, kissed the top of your head and held you as if he had done it a hundred times before.

Fuck the dynamic.

You turned around to face him, mustering every ounce of bravery you've ever had. Almost instantly, he leaned in, as if he'd been waiting on you to turn around this whole time. His beard bristled against your face as your lips crashed against each other's, finally finding their way to one another after weeks of just friendly banter. You were on top of him now, your hands grazing over his mid length hair while his traveled down to your ass.

“I've been wanting to touch you for weeks,” he said between kisses.

“Then why did I have to make the first move?” you said, a wry smile on your face.

A devious grin spread across Chris’ face as he flipped you over on the couch so that he was on top. He left wet kisses on your neck and after lifting your shirt over your head, moved to the parts of your chest left exposed from your bra and down to your stomach. Your hips bucked with an arch forming in your back, relishing in the fact that Evans’ hands and lips were all over your body.

The two of you in all your feverish affection managed to roll off of the couch and fall onto the carpet, somehow knocking down the half full beer off the coffee table in the process.

You were straddling Chris on the ground, wanting nothing more than to feel him inside of you, to feel his bare skin on yours. You noticed the beer spilled on the floor.

“Shit.”

“It's okay, babe, leave it,” Chris said, his voice gruff and husky.

He picked you up and carried you to his bedroom, a place you'd never seen. His room was pristinely clean, for a man at least — very little was out of place. He laid you on the bed with a sense of determination, whispering in your ear as he got on top of you, his shirt half off, “I'm gonna show you how bad I've been wanting this.” His Boston accent had come out in full force...you'd only heard it like this after you'd both been drinking and your own Texas twang snuck out.

“I dare you,” you replied.

Everything seemed to move at lightning speed after that. It was like there was electricity within the touch of his fingers. In a whirlwind he took off your clothes and his own and before you knew it you could feel his dick brush against you, hesitating before he entered you.

“It's ok, I trust you. I want you,” you said at a near whisper, stroking his hair.

At first it was slow, the strokes were uncertain until he got accustomed to you and started a sensual rhythm. He eased himself deeper into you, causing you to throw your head back, letting yourself meld into him. His speed picked up while his lips grazed your nipples and the sound of his wooden bed frame hitting the wall filled the room.

You were in some sort of trance from the feeling of his hips moving against yours. Slowing down a little, Chris pinned your arms to his bed, brushed some of your now wild hair out of your face and placed his hands in yours. “Look at me,” he growled. Your fingers curled around his as he drove himself deeper inside you with a sense of urgency. As you stared into his blue-gray eyes you could feel yourself falling apart, and he did soon after.

The golden light from the setting sun peeked through the windows while you laid in Chris’ arms. Neither of you said a word but you felt closer than ever. Any amount of distance that was between you was gone now.

@honeychicanawrites I would love to know what you think of this. You inspired me to start writing fics!

#chris evans x black reader #chris evans x reader #chris evans imagine #chris evans fanfic #captain america #quarantine imagine #quarantine #black writers

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ji-yaaan · 4 years

Text

°•°•°•°𝐒𝐨𝐥𝐬𝐭𝐢𝐜𝐞°•°•°•°

A Silver x Reader Oneshot ^v^

Note: for the sake of third person it's a fem!reader, and I'm really sorry about that cuz I made this in like... Idk 2-3 am... So my brain is not functioning properly (꒦ິ⍸꒦ິ) sorry bout that guis, but feel free to replace the pronouns and gender thingy ( ´༎ຶㅂ༎ຶ`)

Mistakes were made under the cut!

A midsummer night with the twinkling stars that adorned the vast night skies. There lies a boy with silver hair under the cool shade of the big oak tree. After a long day of school, exhausted from the activities done, the boy leaned over the tree, relaxing at the comfortable ambiance in the middle of the dark forests illuminated by the stars and moonlight. Drowsy from exhaustion the boy nodded off to sleep as the crickets sing the songs of the night. What a sight to see.... The girl thought to herself.

In a sleepless humid night with the stuffy and dusty air suffocating the halls of the ramshackle dorm, a late night stroll in the forest for a breather seems like a good way to pass time and boredom. She ventures out in the dark forest as the moon watches over her up above.

As she strolls in the forest savoring the cool night's breeze. Adrenaline rushed through her veins as she saw a man lying down under the oak tree in the middle of the vast forest. How odd... She thinks to herself. In the dark woods of twisted wonderland, lies a young man deep in slumber, completely out in the open from unknown dangers lurking around. But who was she to judge? There she was venturing out in the forest in God knows what time...The girl stood frozen in her spot as she peered over the young man.

There sat a boy with soft and fluffy silver hair flowing from the cool breeze. With long silver lashes adorning his porcelain face, his chest rising and falling, evident of his state in deep slumber. The girl crouched down mesmerized with the silver haired beauty's stunning visuals.

"Hmmm......? Pfffft!" The girl found herself chucking upon noticing the man frowning in his sleep, his eyebrows knitted together, wrinkling his forehead. What in the world could he be dreaming for him to frown even in his sleep? She asks to herself...

Dazed and confused, the girl subconsciously poked the man's forehead Ahhhhh! I've done it! flustered and shocked from her dumb actions, she tries to get up and leave from embarrassment, only to be interrupted with a big hand that tightly gripped her frail wrists.

The man has awokened from his slumber. "What are you doing?" Exclaims the young man as he furrows his eyebrows while glaring at the girl. The grip tightening at the young maiden's wrist, she said "Wait! Wait! Time out! Time out!". The boy furrowed his eyebrows yet again while he slightly loosens his grip. "Ehehe.... You see.... How do I explain it......" The girl reasoned as the young boy started to tightly grip his hands at her wrist yet again. "Uhmmm! You see I was just having a midnight stroll to take a breather! The ramshackle dorms are pretty iffy and stuffy, so I wanted to get fresh air! But then I saw you sleeping here in the oak tree where I usually go! And then.... Uhm... Oh! And uhm..... I saw you're frowning in your sleep?! so I think I subconciously poked you without me noticing?! I mean who even sleeps in the middle of nowhere frowing right?hehe-....... I mean! I'm so sorryyyy! Please let go of me!!!" The girl started blabbing in panic in front of the boy. "Is that so?......." The boy replied letting go of her wrist.

Thus the akward silence began. The night was silent as the moon shone above the both of them, with crickets singing, as the cool night breeze flew past the two. The night was finally settling in. The ambiance was calming and relaxing. It was the type of akward that is comfortable in it's own way.

"Uhmm..... Have a hard time sleeping too? The night was really stuffy...... I had a really hard time sleeping....." The girl said breaking the ice.

"Is that so?....." The silver haired boy replied. What's with his answers?? I swear if he answers iS thAt sO again I'm disowning grimm.

"Uhm.... My name is (y/n)! A first year from the ramshackle dorms!" she said. "I see you're the first year who made quite the ruckus at the ceremony." He calmly said. "Well.....yeah, there’s that...." (y/n) relpied embarrased and dissapointed.

"Silver" the man said. Hmmm? Silver? The girl thinks to herself. "My name is Silver.... a second year from the Diasomnia dorms." The boy continued whilst sighing."Well.....nice to meet you Silver!" The girl giggles as she beamed a smile to the boy before her.

Little did they knew that this nightly rendezvous marks the start of ever occuring meetings. Encounter after encounter, a morning greeting whilst gazes meet, a warm smile paints their faces. Both of them truly grew fonder and closer with each other as time passed by.

Late night rendezvous became a habit of the two, telling each other tidbits of themselves as they enthusiastically share how their day went with each other, with smiles and laughter that echoed in the forest.

But this innocent friendship between the two of you was soon to be short lived... As silver finally understood what he felt about you. As shocking as it was for him, he felt happy in your precence, but the moment he realized his true inner feelings, he felt his stomach churn from the joy, love, and fear he felt for (y/n). It felt as if all his emotions were stirred up inside him giving him butterflies.

The next following days were a blur. It felt as if viewing a cheesy romance movie with rose tinted glasses. With every smile, every laugh, even the little mannerisms (y/n) did, it never failed to make his heart flutter. Silver felt complete in her precence...

They say humans are naturally greedy creatures....... Silver wanted more he wanted to indulge himself in (y/n)'s light more...... So he did his best to convey his emotions to you.

As much as she'd hate to admit it, the mellow touches silver gives sends butterflies in her stomach. She noticed little bits of the feelings silver conveyed, but she refused to believe the little voice inside her that says maybe, just maybe, silver actually had feelings for you. She was in a state of a blind denial. But she truly appreciated and loved all the small gestures Silver did, she really did found herself a friend she loved.

their innocent friendly relationship could only last for long. The more time passed by, the more sexual tension aroused between the two. With playful fights turning uncomfortable, when they laugh at each other as their gazes suddenly meet.... It was very hard not to notice the tension, leaving both very flustered and bashful with each other. The little nightly tryst the two had felt like a stroll in the clouds. Living life wearing rose tinted glasses was sure a luxury one could have.

A refreshing gush of wind flew past the luscious silver locks of the boy, with his periwinkle orbs fixated unto the book he was holding, a deep sigh escaped his lips as he flips through the pages spaced out, not focusing on the contents at all, as hundreds of thoughts linger on his mind, preoccupying him from reading his book. A thought crossed his mind, no..... This thought was plastered all over his mind when did it go wrong? The cloudy skies above was peaceful, how he wished to have his mind be as peaceful as the clouds above. The boy then put down his book, and succumbs to the drowsiness he's suffering from, due to restless nights of tossing and turning.

As he's nodding off to sleep yet again, the little birds chirp in joy singing the songs of the forest. Along with the songs of the birds, there was a familiar voice who hummed a familiar tune of a melody one has heard before. Yet again, there she stood in front of Silver drowsing off to dreamland. "Hmmmm! Is this deja vu?" (Y/n) sat beside her friend as she put silver's head on her lap. "If you keep sleeping like that, your neck would hurt later you know?"

Time passed by quick with thunders rumbling in the distance, grey clouds enveloped the whole skies threatening for it to pour any moment. Silver then awoke to the sounds that disturbed his peaceful nap. Ah! I've overslept.... what time is it now? but before he could even pull himself together, he was shocked to see himself lying on your lap whilst you slept like a child leaning on the big oak tree.

The lonely nights slowly became brighter and colorful. Without even realizing it, the two started to look forward to the late night meetings under the twinkling stars, basking under the moonlight. These secret little meetings felt like joy to Silver, he felt like time stops whenever he's with (y/n). Mhmmm.... I may have found myself a friend i cherish deeply, huh? Silver thinks to himself smiling whilst looking at (y/n) grinning widely.

He felt his heart melt right then and there...

Was he dreaming, is this a dream? "Wait no, the sky might come pouring down any moment now....." Silver woke up the girl lost in dreamland how cute.....

"AH! I ACCIDENTALLY SLEPT! I was about to wake you up but I bombed it!.... Wait is it going to rain? Oh God....." Cold Raindrops started pouring from the grey skies as the two ran across the forest to seek shelter in the Diasomnia dorms.

The both of you drenched, like little children who had fun playing in the rain, the both of you start laughing at yourselves. Malleus entered the room shocked to see the two of you drenched."Ah! MalMal-Senpai~!" called out (y/n)."Hmm~?.....I see you still call me that nickname huh?" Malleus smiled softly as he offered a dry towel for (y/n).

Silver watched as (y/n)'s face lit up just from simple exchanges from his young master. Ah I see now, this is when everything went wrong huh?..... He thought to himself.

One sleepless night with the humid breeze flowing through the windows, as dusty air covered the rooms of the ramshackle dormitory, (y/n) goes with the usual late night stroll to the forest to find her buddy, Silver. She wanted to talk lots to him about her long day with the troubles that the trio has cooked up yet again. She was so excited just by thinking about it, but she was left dissapointed when she did not find her friend waiting at the usual spot. Silver is probably busy she thought. Ready to go back to the dorms, she stayed a bit longer to linger in the cool night's breeze.

Whilst enjoying the calm ambiance,she felt a presence with her, and to her shock, there was a mysterious man with horns that stood behind her, he seemed oddly familiar to her.... As their eyes locked, the only thing that (y/n) felt was her heart racing out from her chest, a feeling like someone squeezing your heart out making it hard to breathe. "How pretty....." She slipped. "AH I'M SORRY MY THOUGHTS SLIPPED!" (Y/n) admitted to her crimes embarrased.

The man with horns furrowed his eyebrows, but soon after, he chuckled at the young girl's foolish actions. "Hmmmm...really now?... how interesting you are little girl...." The man with horns replied.

(Y/n) was flustered and mesmerised by the man that stood before her. He made her breathless. With the beautiful raven hair that flew past the wind, and the chartreuse eyes that shone in the dark like sparkling emeralds. His porcelain ghostly white skin that almost look transparent......how beautiful.....

"Uhhhmm.... Hello... My name is (y/n)!" Did that sound akward?? She thought. "You're one of the first years that stirred up trouble in the ceremony right?" Says the man with horns.

"Well....ehehe.....yeah, that happend...." She peeked at the man again, only to be caught with his sharp glowing eyes. How embarassing..... "Oh! uhm so you are???" Truth be told, in reality, she already knew the man in front of him, the infamous man who supervises the Diasomnia dorms, the young master of your friend Silver, The Malleus Draconia himself. But it is still courtesy when you introduce yourself to others, they should return the introduction as well. (Y/n) stared at the man anticipating a reply. "Don't you already my name though?" He said. "But it's still respectful to introduce yourself, when someone introduced themselves to you!" (Y/n) whined like a little child, still looking expectant with eyes that shone innocently right back at the dark fae that stood before her. Malleus stared at the small girl, then smirked at her cute behaviour she kept showing. How odd..... how can someone like her not be afraid in my presence?how can she act honestly in front of me? How refreshing.... he thinks to himself. "Hmmm? But you already know my name? What is there for me to introduce?" The man said slightly smirking anticipating the girl's reaction. "Hmmm....is that so?" She replied dissapointed like a puppy with it's ears down. The man smirked again with (y/n)'s honest actions. She wears her heart on her sleeve.....how cute....

"then how about this? Call me whatever you want...." Even Malleus was confused with what he was saying, but he wants to see what her reaction will be, she piqued his interest..... She baffled the fae that stood before her.

"Reeaally??!! You cant take that back!!!" She grinned happily and exitedly as her eyes shone in pure delight. The fae smiles to himself finding the little girl quite odd, I mean, He's Malleus Draconia a poweful man, one of the greatest mages in the world. Yet he's perplex with a young girl approaching him without care in the world, not caring on who he is it warmed his heart to find someone this honest to approach him without being terrified.

"Hmmmm, now what can I call you?......" The girl questions to herself deep in her thoughts as the fae stared at her face, interested eager for the answer she'll come up with. "Pfffft!! I got it!" She says as she peered at the fae's glowing eyes. "Can I call you Malmal?" Her gaze unwavering stared at the man in front of her as she stops herself from breaking down in laughter. "Pfft! Ahahaha!" Malleus was baffled with the nickname (y/n) came up with as he bursts in laughter.... how interesting this girl is.... To have the audacity and bravery to call him that nickname, its starting to appear her bravery is just plain foolishness, but he did not hate it at all.

Silver knew deep inside that (y/n) is slowly falling for his young master. With each encounter with malleus, (y/n)'s eyes lits up like diamonds as she greets malleus with the nickname she came up with.... "Oh! MalMal? Goodmorning! hehe". Silver can't even deny the jealousy that prickled his heart as he saw the person he cherished and loved dearly, falling in another man's arms, worse, she seven fell for the young master that silver truly respected with all his heart. What can he do? He's just your friend, he's just a guard to his young master.....

He felt like his world came down crushing on him, why must this happen? , It felt like a thousand stab wounds pierced his heart... Indulging himself in the light (y/n) gave him was enough for him...... He wanted to do his best to protect your smile and laughter..... That's what he's best at doing..... Right?? He loves (y/n) so much that seeing her happy was enough for him.

Slowly, the nightly rendezvous turned into (y/n) telling silver love songs about Malleus... Even if it hurts, silver sat there listening to (y/n)'s every word, he felt happy to see (y/n) smile ear to ear as she tell about malleus. She never smiled like that before... silver thinks to himself. It left a distinct bittersweet taste in his mouth.

The peace was soon interrupted after muffled sobs rang in the woods, only to see a girl with stains of tears evident in her cheeks and glossy eyes as salty tears trickled in the corners of her eyes.

Meeting after meeting, a tryst under the moonlight as a sweet delightful feeling bloomed in (y/n)'s heart. She fell smitten for the fae with each passing second.

"Silver, what do I do?" She asked the silver haired boy choking on her words. Silver felt his heart drop as (y/n) fell in his arms choking on her sobs. Silver was speechless and was in a state of panic as he tries to console the girl by patting her back, tracing intricate patterns in attempts to calm (y/n) down....

A sunny day as bright clear skies lit the world of twisted wonderland, a chilly breeze flew past the silver haired boy as he woke up from slumber. The birds are chirping melliflous melodies. The once lush leaves that now turned orangefell from the trees as a single leaf stuck unto the boy's hair.

"Hic, he knows...... Malleus knows...... he asked me if I liked him, and I think he doesn't like it.... hic...... He hates me now right?" Reddish eyes gazed at silver as he felt his heart shattering into millions of pieces. "Uhmm..... Don't worry.... No one hates you... You know I like you" he replied with a gentle smile, as he rubbed (y/n)'s back calming her down. "You don't have to say that to make me feel better..... It's fine.... Maybe i'll just make these feelings dissaper? That'll do the trick right? It's better than malleus hating me..." As much as silver wanted to say yes, he wanted to hold (y/n)'s hand, he wanted to kiss her.... He wanted (y/n) to be his..... Seeing (y/n) in pain broke him. "You should just tell him how you feel..." A pained smile painted silver's face...."so can you please cheer up now?" He asked (y/n)..... "You're right...... I should be brave and face my problems...... Thank you silver...... You're the best!" Simple kind words that conveyed innocent feelings felt like a thousand stab wounds...... How stupid have I grown from being with you?...... I guess it's true that love can make someone the most stupid person in the world.....

Springtime is finally over..... Now it's time to stop wearing the rose tinted glasses and continue to live on the life of dull colors..... But that's fine..... The bright hues of the autumn leaves still colored the world of it's dull grey colors.....

"Silver! There you are!" a girl happily called out as she ran in silver's direction. "Sleeping in the middle of the day?.... Haaah...... I can't blame you... Oh! That reminds me! Later this evening, I'll be borrowing malleus hehe~ so you and sebek shouldn't fuss over him later m'kay?~" (y/n) grinned happily smiling ear to ear. "Glad to know you're back to being your usual loud self again...." Silver smiled at the girl. "HEY! LOUD?! Whats that about!" She replied as the both of their laughter echoed in the forest.

On one sleepless night, as silver sat under the oak tree savoring the fresh air of the night. He felt solitude in the peace and quiet surrounding him.

A cold wind blew the autumn leaves as Silver ventured in the woods in a chilly night to pass time of boredom. He leaned in the oak tree that once was green and lush, now with its leaves slowly falling in the ground. Staring at the big oak tree where everything started, his lips curved up to form a weak smile It's time to let her go now huh?. He looks up at the dark skies as tiny shards of light twinkled in the nothingness, he smiled to himself again for the last time, as he goes back to his dorm. But to his surprise he heard faint giggling in the distance as two couple held hands basking under the serene glow of the moonlight on a midnight tryst.

For a brief moment, the girl caught Silver's gaze as a soft mellow smile forms on her face only to be broken when the fae started talking and the girl got her focus back on her lover. His heart throbbed even with just a stare.... When did i become this stupid? but soon enough, a pained smile graced his face, accepting his circumstances, accepting his defeat.

"I lost..... Yet I still care for you.... Now when I look into your eyes, all I see is a stranger who knows all my secrets...... I guess... A soulmate who wasn't meant to be?......now it's finally time to say goodbye..." The autumn leaves flew as the chilly breeze blew past the young boy with silver hair........

• The End •

Y'all if you thought this was fluff.... I'm sorry.... I'm so much very sorry for that..... Pls stone me gently.... ( ´༎ຶㅂ༎ຶ`)

The story became Silver x Reader x Malleus real quick huh? 👁️👄👁️

Also i keep writing fics based on songs i play the song that inspired me here is called: "A soulmate who wasn't meant to be" by Jessica benko ^~^

Solstice: either of the two times in the year, the summer solstice and the winter solstice, when the sun reaches its highest or lowest point in the sky at noon, marked by the longest and shortest days.

Edit: WHY THE FRICK IS TUMBLR MESSING THIS UP! I HAVE TO EDIT THIS FOR LIKE.... 5 TIMES NOW! TUMBLR WTF!

#twisted wonderland #twst wonderland #twst #disney twst #disney #twst fanfic #twisted wonderland x reader #twisted wonderland malleus #twisted wondeland silver #twst silver #silver x reader #malleus draconia x reader #malleus x reader #silver #twst memes #malleus draconia

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sendnotes · 3 years

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books i read in april.

this is going to be my thing from now on. i'll compile a list of all the books i read in a month and share my thoughts on each one every end of the month.

just so you know, i'm a little forgetful, and i have a tendency to forget names, plots, and other details. i'm hoping that writing these will aid my memory in recalling how i felt about each novel.

you can also find me on goodreads

so, let’s begin, shall we?

101 essays that will change the way you think (wiest, brianna)

self-help book

this book got off to a good start! some of the essays written (or should i say a collection of articles originally published on the thoughtcatalog website) made me think and consider my outlook on life, love, and so on.

the title overstates the case though. when i think of an essay, i picture something more argumentative and philosophical. not to mention that the majority of the ideas in this book are redundant. it made it difficult to get through. nonetheless, i was able to get past it because there were so many fantastic concepts and topics discussed.

overall, it's an interesting & worthwhile read for those who enjoy thinking outside the box.i lost count of how many times this book gave me aha moments. i swear, most of the entries soothed my mind and provided a great pick-me-up when life seemed to be frustrating.

the midnight library (haig, matt)

science fiction, fantasy fiction, psychological fiction

regrets, self-remorse, what ifs, family approval, drugs, dreams, love, passion, hatred, death, afterlife, multiverses, quantum physics, and a plethora of possibilities packed into a 304-page book.

i'll be honest: this book is already on my list of favorites. i'm simply blown away by how well-crafted and diverse the entire story unfolded.

a sci-fi novel with a dash of fantasy and a smidgeon of philosophy. if that's your thing, you should give this book a shot.

the first few pages of the book gave me an impression and led me to surmise it was going to be a cheesy ass chick lit novel that i'd only read and find enjoyable in high school. i was completely off base. it proved to be very mature, full of lessons, but delivered in a fun and entertaining manner— exactly my cup of tea.

it reminded me of a disney pixar film called soul, in which the afterlife is depicted in vivid detail. they differ on so many levels, but they both imagine life after death for people who are unsure of their path, purpose, and passion.

every chapter served a significant concept, so this book is well-deserved of a 5-star rating!

norwegian wood (murakami, haruki)

fiction, romance novel, bildungsroman

as i read the book and neared the end, all i could think about was how this book became one of murakami's most popular and influential works.

murakami offers a sprawling glimpse into the lives of a group of severely damaged youths grappling with the realities of what emptiness entails. take what you will from it.

i know a lot of people like it, which is fine. but please keep in mind that this book hit me square in the gut. it alternated between making me angry, sad, annoyed, and disgusted almost constantly. there isn't much else.

this book should come with a warning: "this is not a good place to start if you're new to murakami's works. this is not a representative of murakami's brilliance."

fist and foremost, the characters in this book are all repulsive.

toru watanabe was a fuckboy and a softboy rolled into one. what could possibly be worse than that? he'd have as many casual sexual partners as he could while also buttering a girl up by appealing to her emotions and displaying a "sensitive" and "vulnerable" side.

this book was made even more depressing by the fact that each female character was needy, weak, dysfunctional, and dependent. since they're all the same, i'm not going to go over each of these female characters one by one. you already get the idea.

reiko ishida, imo, was one of the best rendered sections of the novel. most likely because she had a better grasp on her emotions and goals than the still seeking youths... until, *spoiler alert* she wanted to do it with toru as well. a big disappointment.

to summarize, this book is primarily concerned with two topics: sex and death.

hidden meanings are everywhere, but when you get to the core, that's all that remains.

the four agreements: a practical guide to personal freedom (ruiz, miguel)

self-help book

first agreement ⏤ be impeccable with your word

this essentially means that you should not spew gossip or use words to harm others. because words have tremendous power and can cause significant harm. you are not only negatively affecting others with your hateful and thoughtless words, but you are also hurting yourself. this is something with which i generally agree. how i see it, when people are unhappy with themselves, they turn to others to make themselves feel better. as a result, they gossip about others in order to divert attention away from themselves.

second agreement ⏤don't take anything personally

alright. sure. don't let what others say about you bother you. it has everything to do with them and nothing to do with you. well, i don't entirely agree, but i think it's a fantastic idea in general. however, achieving this goal will be extremely difficult. i believe it would take a lot of practice to reach this level of zen. plus, i honestly believe that other people's opinions still matter because they keep you in check. the best advice is to not be swayed by these opinions, but to consider why they were expressed in the first place. see what you can do to improve yourself from there. sure, it can be difficult to deal with; after all, no one likes being told they're wrong or whatnot. but it's not all bad news because you can sometimes use criticism and judgment to give you a competitive edge. i mean- don't you think hearing someone else's point of view is also an opportunity to learn and progress? ruiz should have stressed that it's not just about "not taking it personally because you know you're not that person," but also about not retaliating with an extreme knee-jerk reaction even if you believe you're being unfairly criticized.

third agreement ⏤ don't make assumptions

this is a real eye-opener for me. i've noticed that whenever i become enraged by someone's words, it's usually due to my tendency to assume. personally, i can't help but make assumptions. i don't know what other people's motivations are, and i can't help but draw conclusions based on the information i have. even if the other person had no intention of causing me harm, it's too late. the thought has become ingrained in my mind, and i never ask for clarification out of pride or fear of appearing overly sensitive.

fourth agreement ⏤ always do your best

this section did not seem particularly useful to me. i mean, aren't we all reminded of this all the time? this section is filled with sloppy writing, in my opinion. as if he badly wanted to finish the book and impulsively thought: "okay, fourth agreement: always do your best. that should suffice. lmao"

overall opinion: the third agreement was my favorite, but the rest were a no-go. don't get me wrong, i appreciated his ideas, but i've heard them all a hundred times before. basically, the book's sole takeaway is that we are all suffering in some way in our daily lives, and we are all dealing with different issues. regardless, we all need to be kinder and gentler to ourselves and others.

the song of achilles (miller, madeline)

romance novel, historical Fiction, war story

i'll keep it short and sweet:

i really wouldn't have had this book any other way. miller's writing is breathtaking, so rich and full of lovely detail. it's incredibly a unique concept to me that authors are rewriting such ancient history and stories to make them lgbt+!

some suggest it's tedious, but i disagree. it isn't slow; rather, it is just right.

'cause at the end of the day, it's not about war, tragedy, or heroes - it's a slow-burning, organic love tale between two young men and their inevitable connection.

it's sad, tender, and painful, but in the best way possible.

circe (miller, madeline)

novel, historical fiction, fantasy fiction

"greek mythology, but with a feminist twist"?! sign me the hell up! this piqued my interest... only to leave me feeling completely let down. seriously now. circe was described as a "badass empowered woman," which was the single most compelling selling point for me, and thus the most wrenching disappointment, i must say.

sure, it demonstrated the value of feminine power, but it also did represent how this power can be a force of good or evil.

not to mention the fact that circe fucked a married man or two in this book- i mean- how is that an ~empowered woman~?

let's be clear right off the bat: madeline miller's follow-up to the song of achilles is epic in scope but not necessarily in execution. to me, this read more like a tedious island tale. regardless of how many five-star reviews this book has received... i just don't think it's well-deserved. don't get me wrong here. miller is a fantastic author with a lush writing! istg- i'm blown away by how beautifully she wrote and carefully chose her words. even the most mundane phrases were written poetically. after-all, it’s greek mythology. but how did she manage to make circe seem so... bland?

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isaurq · 4 years

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My personal review of Camila Cabello's Romance album.

- ssweet-moonnnn / Isa

Track no.1 - Shameless.

The title speaks for itself. This song tells a story of passion and pursuit. I love that feeling of wanting someone so much that it actually turns you into a fearless vulnerable human. A paradox, a walking contradiction on its own right. Also I really like Camila’s carefree adventurous sexy latina, I love that energy.

My favorite lyrics from this song would have to be: “In my dreams, I do anything I want to you. My emotions are naked. Screamin' my lungs out for you. Not afraid to face it. I need you more than I want to.”

Note: the lyrics “Write it on my neck, why don't ya?" reminds me of that time when Camila rapped for Lauren “Check on my neck.” I posted a video of that before.

Track no. 2 - Living proof.

I really like how vulnerable this song is, it is an invitation to one’s soul.

My favorite lines are: “Do you feel me? Can you feel me?" and" Show your demons, and I might show you mine.”

Note to this lyrics: This was a tweet from Lauren back in 2014 “Look into my eyes, that's where my demons hide" In 2015 Camila tweeted “show me all your demons”

Track no. 3 - Should’ve said it.

For me this song is a proof of how pride or ego can mess up a beautiful love story. Most often than not a person would let someone go because of her or his pride or ego. It makes one realize that this is life and is not like the movies but you can choose to be genuinely happy by fighting for who you love whether it be over pride, ego or someone else. Take that leap of faith because regrets can be fatal in the end. It also speaks of the importance of communication and voicing out the truth and how you really feel before everything is too late.

My favorite lyrics are: “So you want me now? That's funny. ‘Cause you didn't give a... back then. If you wanted me so desperately, you shoulda said it. You shoulda said it, love. I wish that you could turn back the time. You'd hold me closer instead of your pride. I knew it was you from the very first night. And it took you two years to make up your mind.”

Note: Camila says this album was written in a span of a year, 2018-2019, 2 years ago is 2016 from 2018. Who was with her? Lauren.

Track no. 4 - My oh my.

I love this song, the energy is fun, sexual, dangerous and flirtatous vibe. One of my faves. Camila is Karla Estrabao here.

My favorite lines are: “I said, if he kissed me, I might let it happen. I swear on my life that I've been a good girl. Tonight, I don't wanna be her.”

Track no. 5 - Señorita.

Very catchy, I remember when I first heard it I played it on loop in the shower. One of those fun songs you can suffer a last song syndrome from but I’m loyal to Lauren so I wouldn’t comment about Shawn.

Track no. 6 - Liar.

Another Karla Estrabao sexy tune. This song is about unconsciously wanting someone and contradicting your own self because the truth is, you really can’t help it, you want that person when you thought it is over, it was never really over.

My favorite lyrics are: “I said I won't lose control, I don't want it. I said I won't get too close, but I can't stop it.”

Track no. 7 - Bad kind of butterflies.

I think more so this is a story of someone in a relationship who wants another person. Call me delusional but something tells me that when Camila was dating she was still thinking about Lauren and felt guilty about it. She said in an interview that it doesn’t feel the same with someone you just date versus the one where you were passionately in love with and I agree a hundred percent.

Track no. 8 - Easy.

Fave lyrics from this: “Always thought I was hard to love. Til you made it seem so easy.”

I think this is my fave lyrics off of this song because I am so hard to love personality wise I can be too much for someone, a passionate explosion of some sort and the people who have been with me who truly cared about me loved that trait about me. It seemed so easy for them to love me.

Track no. 9 - Feel it twice.

One of the saddest songs in this record but I think this is another camren song. Timeline 1 year plus 2 years ago 2016, Lauren. Camila said this was one of the saddest moments of her life, I think this is the time where she and Lauren had a misunderstanding and lack of communication.

Fave lyrics: “Oh, I'm scared if I look in your eyes, I might see your soul. Sitting by the phone, holding onto hope. Spending all night wondering why you let me go. I wish you had felt how you're feeling two years ago.”

Track no. 10 - Dream of you.

This song is so sweet. Speaks about that person who you constantly think about and hoping you do cross their mind too.

Fave lyrics: “All I do, the whole day through, is dream of you. Can you please say you dream of me too.”

Track no. 11 - Cry for me.

Ultimate break up song on the record. I think Camila wrote this when Lauren was with Lucy because she was speaking about a girl with her ex at the end of the song.

Fave lyrics: “You said that, in this lifetime, you could never get over me? Are you over me?”

Track no. 12 - This love.

This is one of my favorites. This is a song for your soulmate. It is what I call endless love.

Fave lines: “Know just how to make me miss you. Goin' in our separate ways but when I'm back here in the middle. Losin' you I couldn't face. Waitin' for ya just in case once a year doesn't hurt, Said it's the last time, but nah, Tired of building up my walls, Just to watch them fall again.”

Track no. 13 -Used to this.

Talks about how a place you don’t like could turn into your favorite just because someone you are in love with made it special for you.

In an interview Camila said that she likes to make surprise flights for someone she is in love with. Remember the rumor airport flights between camren back in the day?

Note: Funny how there is a camren play in San francisco.

Fave lyrics: “And it bears repeating. How hard my heart's beating. When you tell me I should stay.”

Track no. 14 - First man.

I couldn’t really relate to this song because I didn’t have the same relationship with my father, I can relate more to Ariana Grande, I think we have the same father. Kidding aside, I like Camila’s dad.

- ssweet-moonnnn / Isa

#camren jaurello #camren #camz and lolo #camila cabello #camila and lauren #lauren jauregay #lauren jauregui #camz da lolo #lolo jauregui #camzi #camz cabello #lolo da camz #karla cabello #karla estrabao #romance #album review #album romance

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shawnpetermuffins · 5 years

Text

Pictured with You (Epilouge)

A/n: we have come to an end to this story of mine. Thank you for sticking around for so long.

Summary: It's been a year, and you're looking for something to do on this week long vacation.

Warnings: fluff

Word count: 1.9k

***

One year later

We wanted a week away from the craziness. Just one week for ourselves and our friends to hang out and not care about having to work - me on the finishing touches of the new album, which I'm actually stressing about right now because y/n still knows next to nothing about it. And that's stupid of me because literally every song is about her and if she tells me she doesn't want that then I'm screwed because I have nothing else to give the label.

She's kicking her feet softly from the edge of the pool, looking nothing less than breathtaking as the blinding sun hits her body just right. I swim away from my friends and to my rightful spot between her legs. Y/n looks down at me when I press a gentle kiss to the tops of her thighs. "Whatcha thinking about, love?"

She hums, running a lazy finger down the column of my neck. "Nothing. Just like watching you have fun, is all."

"It'd be more fun if you got in with me."

"I think you have attachment issues, Mendes."

"Yeah?" I bite playfully at her knee and she laughs, trying to push my head away. "Might have a point there… but I'm not gonna fix that."

"Gonna cling to me more?" She teases as my hands snake around her body, resting softly on the curve of her butt.

"Mmm…" I mumble against her neck. "Never gonna stop clinging to you. Gonna hold you like this forever and ever."

"Don't threaten me with a good time."

"Get in with me," I beg, jutting out my bottom lip as her hands lace through my wet curls. "I'll carry you." That gets her attention.

"Okay," she nods. "Well get me in, rockstar." I smile up at her and swiftly, but carefully bring her down into the pool with me. She shudders at the feel of the cool water against her warm skin. "Fucking hell, it's cold!" Her teeth chatter as she rests her head on my shoulder, arms wrapping tightly around my neck to steal my body heat. We stay like for minute, allowing her to get used to the unfamiliar temperature. "We're good," she mumbles and I slowly move us over to our friends who are goofing around, splashing each other.

"Oh good, she came to join us!" Brian exclaims. Before I know it, y/n is tugged from my arms and being spun around until she's finally thrown into the pool, completely submerged in the chlorine filled water. "There," Brian says triumphantly, with a laugh. "Now you're on our level."

She pushes her baby hairs out of her face with a shake of her head and an exaggerated eye roll, "so thoughtful, Bri. Thanks for that." She splash him once before taking my outstretched hand.

"Sorry, honey," I mumble into her hair, pressing her back to my front. "He caught me off guard."

"S'okay." Her head rests against my chest as we watch them make fools of themselves, not a care in the world. I whisper the words of the song playing into her ear and she falls deeper into me, wrapping my arms tighter around her waist.

"Y/n/n?" I say after a while of comfortable silence drifting between us.

"Shawny," she scrunches up her nose, hating the cutesy nickname, but she can't help that it comes out when she's a little tipsy. I love it though, and kiss the tip of her nose.

"Move in with me," I request, my head buried in her neck.

"What?" She giggles, turning in my arms.

"Move in with me," I say again.

"Where's this coming from?" She wraps her arms around my neck once again.

I shrug, "I mean, you've been going over there a lot more often recently. And… I have a drawer full of your clothes already."

She hums, "well I think I'd need more than just a drawer if we decided to do this."

"I'll get you your own damn closet if you want."

"You'd have to move houses if you did that."

"Then let's look for one. We can find one with a closet just for you, and we can make you your own dark room."

"Whoa there, big spender. That's a big commitment. You sure you can handle all that?"

I nod, "Yes. Hell, I'm ready to marry you right now if you say yes."

She looks up at me with a smirk. "you asking me something, Mendes?"

"Depends on what your answer is," I counter. "What do you say, honey? Will you marry me?"

"I think… my answer is… yes."

"Yes?"

"Yes," she nods, a big smile on her face.

I laugh, pressing my forehead against hers before kissing her deeply. "Oh god, baby. I love you."

"I love you too."

"Let's do it tonight," I plead, my eyes closed.

"Tonight?"

"Yeah. Let's fly out to Vegas and just get married."

"You really want to? I don't even have a dress."

"We'll get you something there. Come on, y/n. Say yes?"

"You," she pokes my chest with her pointer finger, "are completely insane."

I shake my head, "is that your way of saying you'll do it?"

"Well duh," she rolls her eyes as if it was the most obvious thing that we were gonna do this.

"Yo, what is with you two? Do you ever let go of each other?" Connor asks, splashing us.

I hold y/n's head against my chest before I ask. "You guys down for a quick road trip?"

"Where?" Brian asks, shaking out his wet hair.

"Vegas," I say with a cheeky grin.

"What's that look? What are you planning?" Connor questions.

"Y'all feel like being witnesses to a wedding?" Y/n asks, sparing only the smallest of glances to our friends. They're in complete shock. But it only takes a second before they're jumping on top of us, screaming out congratulations.

"Shit, let's go! We hit the road now, we can be there just after sunset." Brian is already pulling himself out of the water.

---

"Nervous?" Brian claps my shoulder while I fix the collar of my shirt.

I chuckle, "dude, my heart feels like it's about to burst out of my chest. I've never been more nervous in my entire life."

"Well what's that thing you always say? Nerves mean you care?"

"Yeah," I nod. "But, god, man. I'm getting married. Did you ever think that was gonna happen? Like this, no less?"

"Hey," he holds the sides of my face and slaps my cheeks. "Don't stress about it. The love of your life is just on the other side of that door. You're just minutes away from your forever. This is going to be the best day of your life."

I swallow the lump forming in my throat, "Yeah. You're right. It's y/n." I can't help but laugh. Because I say it like I'm not still a nervous wreck every time she looks at me. Like my heart doesn't skip a beat every time she smiles. Like I don't forget what I'm about to say because I get lost in those piercing -

The door opens and Connor starts walking down the aisle, arm linked with y/n's, and I swear my breath catches in my throat. She looks beautiful in the white blouse we just got her, and the high waisted, ripped jeans that she insisted on wearing because a skirt was just not her. And I agreed, but to be fair she could tell me she wanted to wear a paper bag and I would have went along with it because I just want her. It's not until she's in front of me, wiping at my cheek that I realize I've been crying watching her walk toward me.

"Hey, come on, bub. Marrying me can't be that bad," she jokes.

I laugh, wiping roughly at my face, "Jesus, no. You're just so beautiful."

She flips her hair playfully, "Well then what are you waiting for, Mendes? You gonna marry me or not?"

Mendes. She's about to be a Mendes, and I can't wait.

---

I wake up the next morning, sheets thrown haphazardly over me and the beautiful girl in my arms. I watch her figure for a few minutes, once I've adjusted to the bright light the sun brings into the room. Her hair is all over the place, but still framing her face perfectly as her eyes moved rapidly behind her eyelids. Her naked chest is just barely covered by the white bedsheets, one arm thrown over her stomach. And then my eyes land on that dainty ring she fell in love with the second I slipped it on her finger last night and it hits me that I'm laying in bed next to my wife. And I let myself think about how I get to wake up next to her forever. It's the most perfect moment.

Until my phone rings beside me and suddenly it isn't anymore.

"Hey, Andrew," I whisper as I answer his FaceTime call.

"WHAT IS THIS I'M SEEING ABOUT YOU GETTING MARRIED?!" Andrew's loud voice booms through my phone and I flinch because y/n stirs beside me.

"Shh…" I point my phone to my girl who is still sleeping, thankfully.

"You got married. Don't you think that's something you should tell your manager so that he's not blindsided early the next morning by all of these pap photos and articles and hundreds of texts and emails asking if it's true?"

"Well I am sorry I didn't tell you."

"So you did? Shawn, what were you thinking? This is everywhere right now."

"I was thinking that I have the most perfect woman by my side and I want nothing more than to spend the rest of my life with her and that I wanted the rest of my life to start right then and there. That's what I was thinking. I'm sorry I didn't tell you and I'm sorry that it's online. But I'm not sorry it happened. I have everything I've ever wanted right here next to me." I look over to see y/n looking up at me with a sleepy smile.

"Shawn," my manager tries to grab my attention, but I can't seem to focus on anything other than the smiling woman next to me.

"If you'll excuse me. My wife just woke up and I would like to give her a proper good morning." I shut my phone off and reach over to brush a strand of hair from my girl's face. "Hey there, beautiful." I say quietly and lean down to press a soft kiss to her lips.

She hums, "good morning, handsome."

"Sleep well? You were… very tired last night," I say with a smirk and she moves to slap me, but I'm quick to catch her wrist.

"Nuh-uh, Mrs. Mendes." She giggles into my chest. "What? What's so funny?"

"Nothing," she shook her head, her hands on either side of my face. "It's just the first time I've heard it like that. I like it."

"Me too."

"So Andrew's mad."

I shrug. "He'll get over it. Now come cuddle," I lay on my beck and open my arms for her. It doesn't take long for her to shrink into my side, head on my chest.

"You still want to be married to me?" She murmurs, half asleep once again.

I press my lips to the crown of her head, "for the rest of my life, baby."

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