Spirit Work: The Power of Hanging Out
Elaborate rituals, intense meditations, and huge gestures have their places in spirit work. There's value in putting a massive effort into something for the spirits you venerate or work with. And sometimes, you need to do these big things for a particular outcome or as part of your tradition.
I have a bias against big, elaborate rituals for this purpose, though. In my practice, it's just unnecessary. All of the relationships I have and maintain with spirits are, at their cores, friendships. They're not working relationships, they're not worshiper-worshiped relationships, they're not transactional relationships. My spirits are my friends.
So I approach working with them like friendship. I'll light a candle and set a cup of coffee or tea on their altar in the same way I'd offer a friend a cup of tea when they visit. If I'm working on something, I'm accustomed to body doubling as someone with ADHD, and I like to invite my friends to work alongside me. In the same way, I'll invite my spirit friends to participate or just hang around while I work.
Heck, they hang out while I write these posts sometimes!
Not everything in spirit work has to be intense and serious. Yes, you should be respectful -- in the same way that you should be respectful to your neighbors and your friends. And yeah, not all spirits can or should be treated this way.
But I would like to posit the humble power of Hanging Out.
What I Mean By That
Literally. Hanging out.
Whatever you normally do to "call" your spirit(s), do that. My method is lighting a candle of some sort. Sometimes, I'll choose a scented candle if I'm trying to lure a particular spirit to the area, but an unscented taper candle will do just fine.
And then, you hang out. That's it.
If you're watching YouTube, invite the spirit to watch with you. Ask their opinions on what to watch, if you have an easy way to communicate with them. (One of my spirits loves Ghost Hunting TV Shows. He thinks it's hilarious.)
If you're playing a video game, leave space on the couch for the spirit to settle next to you to watch.
Make dinner, chat about your days. Set aside a little plate for them if you want. Eat together.
The Value in Hanging Out
The idea here is that time is valuable. Time spent with someone else is valuable on its own, even if that time is spent doing little to nothing "productive."
Think about your friends and the people you enjoy spending time with. It isn't always clubs, parties, exploring, hiking, running, traveling, or whatever else you do. Even if that's how you met or your main activity together, there are always casual moments. Easy breakfasts, simple conversations, sleepovers in your PJs, watching movies.
Quality time is powerful. Choosing to spend your time with someone sends a clear message: "I value your presence."
Not everything has to be an elaborate party. Sometimes, all you want is to sit down and hang out.
Why can't it be the same with spirits? The answer is that it can. In my practice, I rarely do anything that elaborate. I'll put extra effort in for special occasions like holidays, but usually, it's a simple act of lighting a candle, saying hello, and then sitting down with the spirit to just hang out.
Not every relationship requires constant, intense focus. Especially if you're looking to befriend your spirits, rather than just work with them, the Power of Hanging Out is a valuable asset to keep in mind.
It doesn't have to be every day, either. I have a sort of open, standing invitation for whichever spirits to hang out whenever they like. They're welcome to chill anytime, unless I ask to be left alone. Because of our relationship, they respect that. (Usually -- the only time they don't is if something urgent has come up or they need something.)
I developed the theory of Hanging Out years ago. Spirit work was where I started, and it's always been Home to me. But it's intense sometimes, and a lot of what I was doing was burning me out very, very fast. So I adapted on the fly, as one does, and it ended up working really well.
Now, Hanging Out is my primary method of doing spirit work. Even with spirits I don't know or in new locations, there's value in projecting an aura of "I'm just here to chill. Feel free to talk to me, or don't. It's cool." Spirits, shockingly, respond to that. I end up with a lot of interesting, casual conversations, light taps on the shoulder to let me know I've been acknowledged by something that doesn't want to talk, and various visual anomalies from shy critters in the shadows.
Think of it like slow blinking at a cat or offering the back of your hand to a dog. Approaching respectfully and calmly in a very casual way attracts things that otherwise wouldn't show themselves. The Power of Hanging Out is alluring to even the shyest spirits.
Again, obviously, this won't work for all spirits. Do what works for what you work with. I've found Hanging Out works best with ancestors, house spirits, land spirits, and assorted ghosties over the years. It's not so good with, say, the Good Neighbors. But hey, maybe your experience will differ.
Extra Benefits of Hanging Out
Aside from the relationship benefits of casually sitting and hanging out, there are even more practical benefits. As a side-effect of adapting spirit work in this way to work for me, my senses for spiritual energy shot through the roof.
I've always been pretty sensitive. I'm that weird kid at the next table over in the restaurant who clocked the spirit of your recently-deceased aunt who left you her necklace which you're wearing under your shirt and which I couldn't have possibly seen. But when I started Hanging Out and just existing in a space with spirits, everything sort of... exploded.
It's like recognizing your family's footsteps coming down the hallway. When I stopped trying to force myself to understand and recognize every scrap of energy, it all washed over me instead. And in the Energy Soup, I started to recognize more signs and signals without effort.
This is, in my opinion, the greatest benefit of Hanging Out, even for people who don't do spirit work at all. There's no meditative aspect to it, really (though you can certainly meditate to enhance it, if that's something you do). It's just sitting and being receptive.
I don't think this method will work for everyone. People who have zero sensitivity to spirits may not see any results. But I think it has value even for those people.
At its core, Hanging Out is a mindfulness exercise. If you can't be with spirits, be with yourself. Put the call out to whoever or whatever you work with, venerate, sense -- or things you'd like to get to know better. See what answers.
Light a candle.
Say, "If you want to come sit with me and watch TV, feel free. I have popcorn."
Hang Out.
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Welcome Spring Rituals🌺🌼🌿🍃
Spring is a time of rebirth and rejuvenation: the bees are back, flowers are blooming, and plants and animals are no longer dormant and hibernating. Throw away the old and make room for the new during this season.
Here are some ways to welcome the season of Spring. Many of these are quick or easy, great for beginner witches, those on a budget and witches in hiding!
• Cleanse while you clean: Do a deep clean of your home or space. Use lemon, white vinegar, rosemary - something potent and cleansing. Wash your pillowcase, blanket and bed sheets. After your space is clean, open the windows and light a candle/incense or use room spray to freshen the area. You can also banish stale energies while doing this. *Please exercise caution while using cleaners*
• Throw out the old: Donate, sell, give away, recycle and dispose of that which you no longer need. A fresh, clean space creates a clear mind.
• Garden: Plant herbs, flowers, and plants native to your area. Don’t have a lot of space or know-how? Next time you go to the grocery store grab cilantro, basil, green onion (or look into other easy options) and chop off the bottom of the stems at an angle, place in a cup of tap water indoors by a window that gets plenty of sun. Such plants can easily survive in water and after they grow roots place them in a small cup or bowl of soil. If you can’t buy soil go outside and grab some if it’s organic and safe (untouched by unsafe pesticides and fertilizers). Some things can grow by being planted whole or sliced (ginger) or by extracting seeds (tomato) so take your time and do research before you spend unnecessarily.
• Save the Bees: Learn about flowering plants in your area that attract bees. Buy some seeds and plant away! You can also look into flowering plants which attract butterflies and hummingbirds if you wish. If you cannot buy seeds you can learn how to remove them from the insides of some flowers and plant them.
• Flower power: If you live in an area with many flowering plants, go out and admire their beauty. Envision how they’ve survived year after year, how the balance of rain and sun allows them to flourish, and how they’re part of a delicate, beautiful, natural system. If you have your own garden, pluck some flowers if you wish and make a beautiful bouquet to decorate your space with.
• Crystal cleanse: Renew your crystals by cleansing and recharging them. Gather rain water or use moonlight (or a preferred method) to pamper them a bit! Go a step further: clean and cleanse your altar and witchy tools.
• Mindfulness: Spring is a wonderful time to meditate more - light some incense, use meditation tools such as a tuning fork or chimes. Listen to guided meditations. This is also a great time to journal more and sort through your thoughts. Leave behind old, stale energies of the previous year to allow newer, better things to take that place.
• Burn the past: Write a letter (to yourself) about past grief, regrets, and failures. Burn this letter and bid farewell to the feelings and emotions attached to it. After, you may write and keep a separate letter full of goals, wishes and aspirations to last you until next Spring or longer.
• Kitchen witchery: Cook and/or bake and imbue the foods you make with positive things such as peace, good health, and prosperity. Look into recipes specifically meant for spring and utilize produce which is commonly used during springtime. Add color to your food through the use of different veggies, fruits, spices, herbs, etc.
• Expand your craft: Ever tried sun magic? Wind magic? Used sound in your craft? Learn how to make sigils, try a new spell, make a spell jar, research and aspect of witchcraft you don’t know much about. Educate yourself on cultural appropriation, respecting closed traditions, how people around the world welcome springtime, the history of witchcraft both in the east and west.
• Expand your skills: Try something new! Take an art or cooking class, buy a cookbook, learn to crochet or sew, consider hobbies that are practical and exciting. Invite new skills and interests into your life. Study plant identification, learn how to garden on YouTube, learn how to identify stars… whatever may interest you, be open to it. Look for online tutorials, videos, free apps, library books, and people to aid you.
• Create: Spring brings vibrant colors and we can find so many ways to honor this. Draw, color, doodle, write, sing and dance. Paint a birdhouse, or some stones. Decorate your Grimoire or Book of Shadows. Add color to your life.
• Glamify: When you have free time, try on different clothes, makeup, hairstyles, and jewelry. Mess around, have fun with it, and see which combinations make you feel best. Glamours are such a subtle way to practice your craft. Wear colors that make you happy whether it’s clothes, accessories, hair or nail polish!
• Rest: Stop. Slow down, breathe mindfully. Turn off or silence devices, log off social media. Take a substantial break from screens. Take a nap. Have a soothing cup of tea. Stare at the sky. Spring is a time of growth and growth requires rest.
•Pampered and polished: Massage yourself from head to toe with lotion or body oil. Take your time and go in slow circular motions. Don’t neglect your scalp, face, neck, shoulders or feet. Visualize leaving old pains and worries in the past.
Do something extra for yourself, whether this means added rest, an at-home facial, deep condition for your hair, maybe you need a good back scratch or to stretch out, or a cooling or heating pad (frozen veggies or warm dishcloth can be used) over your eyes or a sore area. Listen to your body and tend to yourself when possible.
Take a steamy shower or bath. Toss flower petals, herb sprigs or citrus slices into your bath. After, indulge in a lotion, perfume, or body oil you enjoy. Wash away the energies of the past and the remnants of winter. Surround yourself with what makes you happy and feel good.
• Say thank you: Thank special people, loved ones, and pets. Take a while to think about those who uplift you, support you, make you laugh, and listen to you. Show gratitude towards others. You may also thank the universe, nature, and God or deities you worship however you see fit, whether this means time spent in nature, prayer or offerings.
• Share your bounty: Cook and bake for your loved ones, give them something from your garden such as flowers, herbs, veggies etc. This can also be as simple as giving someone a genuine compliment. Have a “one dish” party with friends/family in which everyone pitches in. Come together and teach people something or learn something new. Plant a garden with your friends/family/community. Share your resources but do not dim your own flame to keep others lit. Take time for yourself, too.
🌊sea star witch🌟
These are mere suggestions and we tend to know what suits us best. I understand not everyone has the time, energy, spoons, resources or funds for all or half of these activities.
If you’re stumped, burned out and exhausted (like I am) don’t feel pressured to try all or most of the above. Slow down and tend to yourself.
Sit back and enjoy the beautiful spring skies, listen to the birds, watch the flowers grow, watch clouds pass by over head. Appreciating spring can be as simple as this!
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