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kasdan · 9 months

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𝐸𝑚𝑏𝑒𝑟’𝑠 𝐹𝑢𝑟𝑦 {𝘤𝘩𝘢𝘱𝘵𝘦𝘳 𝟤}

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a/n: i’m literally the worst at writing summaries i’m sorry annddd no frank in this one but there will be in the next chapter 😗😗

Summary: you try to make your way out of the lab, with discoveries that make you unleash your true power.

Pairing: frank castle x reader

Warnings: language, choking (not the good kind), tasing, weird ass creatures, blood, death, angst

Word count: 3.3k

Chapter song: Hayloft II (Dark Verb Mix) by Mother Mother

I freeze as the guard stands in the doorway, surveying the area with his eyes focusing on the dead body right behind me. The guard moves quickly to draw their pistol, but I move faster.

They barely have the gun in their hand when I grab their wrist and bend it backwards, causing them to let out a cry of pain before they’re forced to drop it. I bring my leg around theirs to kick the back of their knee, forcing them to fall to the ground with a grunt. I don’t hesitate when I bring my other knee up and hit them under the chin as hard as I can. The force sends them falling backwards to the ground on their back.

I go over to get the gun that was dropped, but am stopped short when I feel something connect to my side, and for the second time today, I fall to the ground, shaking as electricity courses through my system again.

I squeeze my eyes shut as I try and fail to pick myself up, pushing up on my arms but then falling back to the ground when they give out under me. I hear the guard force themselves up next to me, my body going limp as I feel them grab my arm and forcefully flip me on my back.

I open my eyes slightly, squinting up at the guard above me, who wears an angry look on their face. I lay as still as possible, with shocks still periodically going through me, and I see the guard bend down and reach for me. I take the moment to gather a burst of energy and catch them off guard.

I lock both my legs around one of theirs and swing my body so it ends up behind them, and then I bring my arm around, locking it around their throat. The guard freaks out and brings their arms up to claw at mine around their neck. I lock my arm harder against their throat to not let up, and the guard works their body up so they’re standing. I lock my legs around their waist, and they move to slam me against the wall with me clinging to their back. Black dots circle my vision, but I keep my arm locked around their throat, and I can feel them start to feel the effects of not being able to breathe. The guard still claws at my arm, but I can feel them getting weaker the longer I hold the position. It’s not long before the hold on my arm loosens and our bodies fall to the ground. I slowly release my arm from their throat, and when I don’t feel them breathing anymore, I push them off of me, body rolling over on the ground.

I work to pick myself off the ground, using the wall to steady myself. I lean my back against the wall, out of breath, trying to work the dizziness that I start to experience out of my system. I can’t stay here long; this hallway isn’t going to be empty for much longer, and finding me with two dead bodies probably isn’t going to bode well for me.

I start to work my way towards the gun that was dropped on the ground, hugging the wall to support myself. I manage to reach it and bend down to pick it up, barely managing to keep myself steady.

I release the magazine from the pistol, checking how many rounds it has in it. There looks to be 7 rounds, good enough for me to use. I lock the magazine back in place and cock it, making sure it was ready to fire just in case.

I keep the pistol in my hand at my side as I make my way down the hallway in search of an exit. I walk as fast as I can down the hallway, still keeping steady on the wall as I go. I walk down endless hallways trying to find any sign of an exit out of this place, but I haven’t the slightest idea what to look for.

I reach the end of one hallway and make a turn into another one that looks exactly the same; this happens multiple times until I reach the end of a hallway and start to hear footsteps coming from the next hallway down. I work quickly to try and get into the first room I see.

I go up to the door a couple doors down from the end of the hallway where the footsteps are coming from, and I shakily try and find the fingerprint panel in order to open the door. I run my hand over the side of the door, trying to find any kind of abnormality that might give me a clue on where the panel is. The footsteps get closer, and I’m scrambling to open the door. I end up bringing the severed finger up and putting it against the wall in multiple places. The door finally pops open after a small beep from the panel on the side, and I quickly make my way into the room, quietly closing the door behind me.

I hear the footsteps recede, and I let out a breath as I lean against the wall, catching my bearings. I look around the room, finally surveying it, and it looks identical to my cell—nothing much but a small table and toilet. However, the paper and pencils that lay untouched on the table in my cell seem to be thrown around and torn up, and the walls are filled with scratch marks.

I don’t have time to question it before I hear movement coming from a corner of the room and whip my head in the direction the noise came from. I can see a shadow moving that I didn’t notice before, and bring the gun up in front of me. It turns around, and my breath catches in my throat.

"Ellie?" My voice comes out as a whisper, my resolve dropping, the gun being brought lower. I look into the same green eyes I’ve seen so many times before, but they’re sunken in and clouded over, no longer bright and full of wonder. The skin is black and wrinkled all over the body, with claws that look sharp enough to be able to cut through anything.

"What did they do to you?" I speak in the same tone, eyes wide and filling with tears. I know the thing in front of me is not the Ellie I knew anymore and is just a creature put in her place, but the part of me knowing it was her had me hesitating to do much.

Suddenly the thing bares its teeth, with them looking as sharp as its claws. I step back when my brain registers that it’s moving closer to me, but it moves quickly to jump at me, pushing me down with its force.

I let out a painful cry as my body hit the hard ground. I wasn’t preparing for the impact, and even with the grip I had on the gun, it gets knocked out of my hand, sliding just out of my reach. My body panics as I feel the weight of the creature above me, now knowing I don’t have a defensive weapon.

The creature growls above me, teeth still exposed, as drool drops from their mouth onto my face. I make a noise of disgust as I feel it dripping down my chin and onto my neck.

I let out a wail as I feel its nails dig into my arm, blood dripping down to my elbow. Tears well up in my eyes, and I stretch my other arm out to try and reach the gun. It’s just barely out of my reach, my fingers grazing the gun, and I try to push the creature off of me, but it has too much strength.

I squirm my body, trying to get as close to the gun as I could with the creature sitting on top of me. I see the creature bring its claw up, about to slash it down on me, and I stretch my arm out as far as I can, feeling something pop before I can finally get a handle on the gun. The creature starts to bring its arm down, and I quickly bring the gun up and shoot the creature in the forehead. It falls limp on the ground beside me.

My breathing is sporadic as I stand up on shaky legs and wipe my face off with the back of my arm.

"I’m sorry, I’m so sorry." I speak to the body that used to be that of my friend with tears running down my face. I always wondered what happened to her, and I can’t tell if it would have been better not knowing.

Suddenly, I hear a siren start blaring throughout the building. If they haven’t found the two bodies I’ve left behind, I bet they were alarmed by the loud gunshot that just sounded. I have to find a way out of here. I take one last look at the creature's body, and I make my way out of the room.

There are red lights flashing along with the siren, making the hallways dark and hard to see in, a big contrast from the once blinding bright lights. I start to work my way down the hallway, once again trying to find a way out of this place. I’m turning down random hallways looking for any kind of change, and I find something when I see the hallways become wider with more space open between them. I move towards the wider part of the hallway until I hear a series of heavy footsteps and shadows coming from that direction.

I know that it’s most likely a group of guards looking for the intrusion, and with me being who they’re looking for, I’m not interested in sticking around.

I go up to the first door I see and take the finger I still have with me out. I hope that all the panels are in the same place for every door because I don’t have enough time to try and find it. Luck is on my side because the door pushes open after my first attempt, and I rush inside the room.

I let out a breath, but the relief is short-lived when I see someone staring back at me from inside the room. They’re wearing a white lab coat with a badge attached to it, making me assume that they're one of the scientists who work there. They’re sitting at a table filled with some kind of moving picture on it, with papers scattered all across it. I see the person move slightly to reach for something next to them, and I quickly bring up the gun to stop them.

"I wouldn’t." I mention, and they stop in their tracks after seeing the gun, slowly raising their hands in defense. I see a radio next to them, figuring that was what they were reaching for. I move closer to them, motioning for them to move out of the way, and I grab the radio and throw it at the wall, breaking it into pieces. The scientist cringes at the smash, hands shaking as they still hold them up in the air.

"How do I get out of here?" I ask them, and they shake their head at me.

"You can’t get out. Not with the security that’s put in place. You can’t even see the exit door without access to it."

"Then how do I get access?" I ask, my patience running thin as I know I have a limited time until the guards eventually find me.

"You can’t. There’s only one other way out of here." They quickly shut their mouth after saying it, and I can tell that they didn’t mean to let that last part slip.

"What other way?" I pushed the gun closer to them for emphasis, but they kept their mouth shut, body shaking. They say nothing, but their eyes keep glancing at the table behind me. I follow their gaze and see a red lever on the table.

"What does the lever do?" I ask them, and they look at me wide-eyed, like they didn’t expect me to realize they kept looking at it. When they don’t respond, I push more. "What. Does. It. Do? I won’t ask again." I say as I push the gun into their chest and place my finger on the trigger.

"O-okay! Okay! Just please d-don’t shoot me!" I let out a sigh, any patience I had left diminishing into nothing, and it looks like the scientist notices it too.

"I-it’s an emergency lever to take down the security of the building. Put in the code, pull the lever, and the entire building's security is taken down." They speak fast, barely making a break, sweat covering their face.

"Put the code in." I demand with a firm voice, and the scientist hesitates, and they soon realize that it was a mistake.

"Put the goddamn code in before we see how many of these bullets can fit in your body before you stop breathing." They nod their head multiple times in quick succession, eyes wide, before slowly moving towards the table. I get behind them and press the gun against their back, and I can physically feel them shutter. I would feel bad, but I know that they know exactly what’s been going on in this lab and have been turning a blind eye to it all.

I hear them push in the code, and there’s a light below the lever that turns green. I go to pull it before I hear a voice coming from behind me.

"I wouldn’t do that if I were you." I whip my body around, gun following the motion until it’s pointed at the new person in the room. My breath hitched seeing the new person who inhabited the room. I don’t speak and just stare at them, gun still drawn.

C'mon, sweetheart, put the gun down." He smiles at me, and I feel rage bubble up inside me.

"Do not call me that. You have no right." With my jaw clenched and my body tense, I stand there, my heart pounding and my breathing heavy.

"My bad, my bad, okay." He puts his hands up in a mocking way as he lets out a breathy laugh. "I just thought you might want to know what happened to your friend." My grip on the gun tightens, and it took everything in me not to pull the trigger. I would have pulled the trigger in a heartbeat if he didn’t have the answers I was looking for.

"You see, she was part of the same experiment you were; she just didn’t quite cut it, apparently." The entire time he’s standing there talking, he has a smile on his face, and it just makes me more angry. "You should have heard her screaming after we took her away from you; even gave you a name wasn’t that nice of her."

"Shut. Up." I force out of gritted teeth, my hand starting to shake in anger as I look the man who took everything away from me in the eye. That’s when I realize he’s stalling, and the reason he told me that was to keep me occupied long enough for guards to get there. The door burst open, and groups of guards started piling in, all with their weapons aimed at me. I do the one thing I can think of at the moment.

I quickly turn around and pull the lever down; a beeping sound comes from it. I feel the bracelet that I was forced to wear loosen, and I look down, forgetting that I even had it on. It wasn’t a skin-tight fit anymore, and the item circles around my wrist lightly.

All of a sudden I can feel my body start to get warm, like how it does when I’m on the experimentation table, but not boiling. I look down at my hands and can see a light teal circling them, and I look back up to the other person in the room. For the first time since I’ve seen him in here, his face has a look of worry on it.

"What’s wrong? Scared to let your creation loose in the world?" I stare mockingly at him, my skin heating up again as I feel surges of power ripple through me. I see him snap back out of his daze and sends an order to the guards to attack me. Bullets fly towards me in quick bursts, but there is something keeping any of them from hitting me. Every time a bullet gets close to me, I can see a faint outline of a bubble around me before the bullet drops to the ground at my feet.

All the guards stand there stunned as they run out of bullets to try and shoot at me. Now it’s my turn to laugh as I feel the power build up again, and suddenly the walls start to break apart and pieces of the roof start to cave in. The guards and scientists in the room scramble to get cover, but a large piece of the roof falls directly on top of the guards as I turn to focus my attention on the person in the room towards whom most of my anger is directed.

"Now hold on a second-" He tries to get in a sentence, but I don’t let him have it as the ground beneath him starts to open up. He falls into the ground, holding onto the side of the floor that is still stable, his legs dangling into the abyss. I squat down in front of him, and he tries to reach for me, but I click my tongue, moving out of his reach. Please, I-" he attempts to talk to me again, but I ignore him once again.

"Have fun in hell, father." I tell him as he loses his grip on the floor and starts falling, screaming as he falls into an abyss. I stand up and look to the other side of the room, where the other scientist is. They’re cowering in a corner, jumping when a piece of the ceiling falls close to them. I don’t give them any mind as I walk out of the hole in the wall where the door to the room used to be.

The hallway didn’t fare much better, with half of the walls torn apart and debris everywhere from where the building is falling apart. I see another group of guards close to me, but they’re not paying me any mind as a couple of the creatures that I killed earlier trap them into a corner. I watch as the guards stand no chance against them and see a creature jump on top of a guard, knocking them down and bringing their claw down to slash at their throat.

I turn to walk away in the other direction, the way out seemingly easier now that the building is collapsing in on itself. I turn a corner to see a hole in a wall not leading to any normal room that I’ve seen, and I start to walk towards it. Once I get up to it, I stick my head out of it, looking around, before letting my foot step into it. The floor isn’t a normally tiled floor anymore, and I look around and notice that I’m not in a building anymore. There are no walls, no ceiling, and no bright lights. It’s freedom. I am free at last.

@sleeperthelazy @hathay @lunaticgurly @casa-boiardi

buy me a coffee ♡

#frank castle #frank castle angst #frank castle fanfiction #frank castle x f!reader #frank castle x reader #frank castle fic #the punisher x reader #frank castle series #frank castle x female reader #the punisher #frank castle x y/n #frank castle x you #embers fury #slow burn

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hawkstincan · 10 months

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Tagged by @starstruckpurpledragon for the 15 Mutuals, 15 Questions meme

1. Are you named after anyone?

Nope. I don’t think anyone in my family was.

2. When was the last time you cried?

If weeping counts... Yesterday? Big cryings were all at the end of last year. When Loch passed away I was crying a lot. Can’t remember how many days though.

3. Do you have kids?

Nope. My step sister has a son. I’m avoiding them for now. Crying babies isn’t a thing I can handle with grace.

4. Do you use sarcasm a lot?

It depends? I use it a lot with my close friends. And family. Not at work. They just don’t get it. So it’s easier to keep my mouth shut.

5. What sports do you play/have you played?

I’m not a sports person. I love playing badminton and I think I was not bad at it. I sadly didn’t play for ages. Too little time, too many things to do. And I’m not sure my back and knees can handle playing any active game.

6. What’s the first thing you notice about people?

Tone of the voice. This is about irl meetings, right?

7. What’s your eye color?

Blue-ish grey or grey-ish blue.

8. Scary movies or happy endings?

Happy endings. (I spent a bit too much time writing and deleting here xD)

9. Any special talents?

Hmmmm, I can miss whatever everyone and their pets knows about? If something isn’t in my zone of interest… It’s safe to assume I know nothing about it. On the other hand my zone of interest is wide and strange af xD

10. Where were you born?

In moscow. I was once told which hospital but I never cared enough to remember.

11. What are your hobbies?

Hmmm, I knit scarfs. Yep. Scarves only. I do it to relax and trying to work with schematics is not relaxing for me. So scarves. I draw when I feel inspired or have the IDEA. The ‘you can’t get this shit out of your head until you try to do something with it’ idea. Eating your mind and all your ability to focus idea. I wrote down some of the brain eating ideas I had too. I collect stuff. Like I have a collection of cinema (train, theater etc) tickets. And yes, in-app tickets are useful and amazing and all that… but I miss my paper tickets so much 😭 You can think of my book-buying as collecting too I guess. It’s hard for me to read books on a reader or smartphone. I do prefer to buy paper books. And comics. And manga.

12. Do you have pets?

I have two cats. Lenny is an adorable two years old. Loves playing fetch xD Meloch' is loud, annoying, 10+ yo and I love her dearly.

13. How tall are you?

165 cm (it’s 5'5" I think?)

14. Favorite subject in school?

History and computer science.

15. Dream job?

When I was a kid I dreamed about being a veterinarian. And after I got my first job… I’ll be honest here. My dream job now is to sit on my butt reading stuff (watching stuff, playing stuff) and to have no need to work. I have zero inner need to participate in social life of my county. Talking to strangers makes me anxious. I stress a lot in a new company. I can’t speak on job interviews. I’m terrible at communication. Jeez, I dropped out of college cause I was too stressed about the exams. (And well teacher as a career was the worse choice I've made. Do not let your parents bully you into 'just get your diploma there and do whatever later' kids) I just couldn’t handle them. And my current job… My mom got me there temporarily. And I was around since I was a teen and people knew me and I had known them… So I’m quite happy to be left alone or with my friends. But I need money to buy food and pay bills so seating at home isn’t a possibility until retirement (the road is so far). Tagging @luna-shimizu, @simpledontmeanpeachy, @eaion, @mommalosthermind, @thefancydragonqueen, @kateera, @thing2dani, @hardwiredweird, @hautecoldture, @holycafe, @lotusvalkyrie, @ruti2, @artsyape, @superalondrauniverse, @ptatas77

#tag game #hope you don't mind me tagging

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sassyhobbits · 3 years

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rowaelin with their first child and they get into that stranger anxiety phase and cry with everyone except when they're in their mothers arms and it's exhausting but also adorable but rowan sometimes feels like a bad dad because his kid doesn't want to be held by him so aelin has to reassure him and then some day this phase is finally over - prompt 😢🥺

ok i adored writing this one. dad rowan is so much fun to work with. i hope everyone enjoys!!

~~~

In his over 300 years, Rowan Whitethorn Galathynius had been awoken by many different things. Whether it was a call to battle while sleeping in a war tent, a summons from his queen late at night, or a lover trying unsuccessfully to disappear quietly before dawn. Yet, none of these manners of waking up had filled him with as much dread as he felt currently.

He was woken in the middle of the night by a shrill shriek coming from the room that adjoined the one he shared with Aelin. In the recent months, what had once been a leisure room had been converted to a nursery for their new baby girl.

It took three years after Aelin’s coronation before they decided to start trying to have a child. It took another year before they were successful. Rowan counted his blessings. He had seen plenty of Fae couples take decades before they finally conceived.

Eliora was four months old now, which meant four months of troubled sleep for both him and his mate.

Rowan was instantly on alert at the sound of his daughter’s cries. He knew that they were no more than a normal babe’s troubles, but his instincts made him tense anyways. He quickly sat up, looking down at his wife quickly to see if she had woken up. Luckily, she still slept, likely beyond exhausted from the mix of raising a child and ruling a kingdom. If Rowan was successful, she wouldn’t have to wake up at all.

He got out of bed and swiftly stepped into the nursery, coming before Eliora’s crib. Her tiny face was pinched up in dainty outrage, small limbs flailing as she cried. Rowan took a deep breath, sending a prayer up to the gods more out of habit than faith at this point, and picked his daughter from the crib. Hopefully, this would be the time he could get her to stop crying.

The little princess shrieked and protested whenever she was in anyone’s arms besides her mother’s. Rowan’s included.

“I’ve got you, my little light,” Rowan whispered to his daughter, cradling her tiny body to his bare chest and lowering himself onto the rocking chair they kept beside her crib. “Everything’s alright.”

Despite his soothing words, Eliora still continued to cry. It broke Rowan’s heart to hear, broke it even more to know that nothing he did could seem to calm her down.

“Please stop crying, love,” Rowan pleaded, threading his fingers through the fine, silvery-blonde hair growing on his daughter’s head. “Your mother is so tired and needs her sleep.”

Unfortunately, even begging didn’t seem to work.

Over the sounds of Eliora’s cries, he heard the door hinges creek, and the sound of bare feet scuffing over stone. Rowan glanced over, finding Aelin walking towards him. Exhaustion weighed down her beautiful face, but her eyes were still full of fondness at the sight of the two of them.

Rowan looked to her apologetically before his face crumpled in defeat. “I can’t get her to stop crying. I’m so sorry, Fireheart.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for, love,” she whispered, leaning down and pressing a kiss to his hair. “Give her to me.”

Rowan handed the squirming bundle of blankets to his wife. Aelin situated their daughter in her arms before she lowered herself on Rowan’s lap, allowing him to wrap his arms around her waist, press a kiss to her shoulder, and begin to rock them.

Quickly, Eliora’s cries began to fade away. Her face unscrewed, looking at Aelin with those wide, Ashryver eyes that she had.

Aelin began to sing a low, Terrasenian lullaby as he continued to rock the three of them. It never ceased to amaze him how good she was with their daughter, how quickly she was able to sooth her temper. He only wished that he could do the same, that Eliora would look at him the same way she looked at Aelin and not scream and scream and scream.

Rowan’s heart was full of love as he watched Eliora’s eyes begin to droop shut at the soothing rocking motion and the sound of her mother’s voice. It wasn’t long before she was once again asleep, the night perfectly silent.

Rowan helped Aelin stand, keeping a hand against her back as she brought their daughter back to her crib and laid her down. Perfect. She truly was perfect.

A gentle hand on his arm drew his attention away from the slumbering babe. Aelin nodded her head towards their room and Rowan dutifully followed, shutting the door quietly behind them.

“I’m sorry, Fireheart,” Rowan said again, drawing Aelin into his arms and kissing her forehead. “I know you’re exhausted.”

“No more so than you.”

Rowan could only sigh, pressing his lips together tightly. His emotions were troubled, and he should have known that Aelin was going to notice. She leaned back slightly, peering up at his face.

“I know what you’re thinking, Rowan, and you’re wrong,” she said matter-of-factly.

Rowan wanted to believe her, but he couldn’t help but ask, “What am I doing wrong?”

He had faced many challenges over his years. Wars and battles and tortures. He had survived them all and came out victorious. And yet, the thing that brought him to his knees, was the fact that he couldn’t bring comfort to his own daughter when she needed it. A baby had finally defeated him.

“You know you’re not doing anything wrong,” Aelin said firmly. “The nurses said this happens sometimes. It’s not your fault.”

Rowan had heard this what felt like a thousand times. It did little to soothe his troubles.

Rowan was good at many things. He was a warrior and a general, had stepped confidently into the role of king consort. His hands could kill and heal and build, but they couldn’t get Eliora to stop crying. He couldn’t help but feel that, perhaps, being a father… wasn’t something that he was made for.

It broke his heart to think. He remembered how excited he was when they found out Aelin was finally pregnant, how they cried and kissed and clung to each other, whispering about the future. He had been ecstatic, but also terrified. He knew Aedion, who had welcomed his own son into the world a year before Aelin got pregnant, had felt the same before he was born. But, Aedion hadn’t had the troubles Rowan did. He had stepped into fatherhood gracefully, and his son loved him immensely.

“Hey,” Aelin said, a bit snappily. She put her hand on Rowan’s cheek and urged him to look at her. In those eyes was a familiar fire. “Stop that. I know what’s going through your head. You’re a wonderful father.”

Rowan sighed and hung his head, pressing Aelin’s hand more firmly against his cheek. “How can I be a good father if I have no idea what I’m doing?”

“Do you think I’m a bad mother?”

“What? Of course not.”

“Well, I don’t know what I’m doing either,” Aelin said. “Neither did Aedion or Lysandra. No new parent has any idea what they’re doing. It’s part of the job.”

She made it sound so easy. Aelin had always had a knack for that.

“I wonder if there’s some secret behind it,” Rowan mused as Aelin tucked herself back into his chest and wrapped her arms around his torso.

He felt his wife shrug. “I don’t know… but if there was, I think it would be to love them. To support them. To do everything in our power to make sure they’re happy.”

“I love Eliora more than life. There’s nothing I wouldn’t do for her.”

“I know, love.” Aelin rolled on the tips of her toes and brushed a soft kiss against Rowan’s mouth. “Now, all you need to do is have patience.”

He chuckled. “Look at you. Who would have ever guessed that Aelin Galathynius would be lecturing me on patience.”

Her grin was a slash of white in the dark. “I’ve been told I’m wise beyond my years.”

“Who the hell has ever told you that?”

“People. Now, will you come back to bed with me?”

“Of course, Fireheart.”

They climbed back under the covers, pressing their bodies close. Aelin fell back asleep almost comically quickly. Rowan wasn’t far behind, holding his wife tightly throughout the night.

…

Another month went by and little changed. Both Rowan and his wife were getting little sleep during the night, leading to some groggy mornings. He had seen Aelin taking short naps at her desk or dozing off when an advisor spoke for too long. She would, of course, deny it if Rowan ever brought it up, so he wisely stayed silent.

Eliora still abhorred being held by anyone except Aelin. The fact that it wasn’t just him brought Rowan a bit of solace. His daughter cried when held by Lysandra or Fenrys or Elide. She had a particularly nasty meltdown last time Lorcan had held her.

“I know, sweet girl,” Aelin had murmured, taking Eliora from Lorcan. “I wouldn’t want to be that close to him either.”

Still, Eliora’s reactions didn’t deter Rowan from trying to hold and soothe her, though he had not yet been victorious. Patience, Aelin had said. It was easier said than done.

The sun had set below the Staghorns hours ago. Eliora was asleep in the nursery, Aelin was treating herself to a long soak in the tub, and Rowan sat in one of the plush armchairs they kept in their room, sharpening and polishing some of his blades.

It was an easy practice to get lost in. The simple, repetitive movements were a welcome distraction. A good way to cool down before bed.

However, his hands froze when he heard a tiny whimper sound from the nursery that quickly morphed into a shrill cry. Eliora.

Rowan placed his blades down on the low table before him, pushing to his feet and quickly striding into the nursery.

Eliora was wiggling as she wailed. Rowan wished he could read her mind so he knew exactly what was bothering her and how he could help. But, all he could do was take a deep, bracing breath and scoop his daughter into his arms.

“What’s wrong, little light?” Rowan whispered, carrying her over to the rocking chair. “What is it?”

Eliora’s only response was to continue crying.

Rowan sighed, wondering how much longer he had before Aelin got out of the bath and came in to calm Eliora down. He had seen Aelin do it countless times. She would take Eliora into her arms, smile down at her, start to whisper nonsense or sing a low lullaby. She made it seem so easy.

“Everything’s alright, Eliora,” Rowan murmured, switching to the Old Language. “I’ve got you. I’ll never let anything happen to you, little love.”

And then, something amazing happened.

Slowly, Eliora’s cries began to fade away to a whimper and then, to nothing at all. Rowan held his breath, worrying that one wrong move would put her back into a fit of hysterics. His daughter slowly opened her eyes and peered up at him.

Rowan smiled down at her. “You’re just as lovely as your mother. Just as stubborn, too.”

And then, as if she understood his little joke, Eliora flashed him a gummy smile. The shift in expression floored him. She had never given him a smile before.

Rowan felt his throat tighten and his eyes begin to burn, but he smiled back at the tears welled up. A tiny laugh escaped his throat. Finally, finally, he had done it.

Eliora’s chubby arms reached up. Rowan held out a finger, letting her wrap a tiny hand around it. He always forgot just how small she was.

“I love you more than you could possibly know, Eliora.”

He was too distracted by his daughter and the little grip she had on his finger to notice that Aelin had entered the nursery until she was almost upon them. Rowan looked up at his wife, knowing that his eyes were still watery and there were likely tear tracks streaking down his cheeks. Regardless, he beamed.

“It would seem, once again, that I was right,” Aelin said with a triumphant smirk.

“As you often are, my love.”

She laughed and dropped a kiss to his forehead before draping her arms over his shoulders, leaning over and watching their daughter, who was studying them with wide eyes. Once again, Eliora smiled. Rowan would never tire of the sight.

“She looks like you when she smiles,” Aelin mused.

“You think?”

She nodded slowly, reaching out and running her knuckles along the smooth curve of Eliora’s cheek. “I still can’t believe she’s ours. She’s just so… perfect.”

“Like her mother.”

Aelin snorted. “Kiss ass.”

“Maybe a little.”

They faded into silence, simply standing there, wrapped up in their little, blossoming family. They stood there until Eliora’s eyes fluttered shut once more and she drifted off into a peaceful sleep. One she enjoyed for the entirety of the night.

Rowan didn’t know what he had done to deserve such bliss, but he knew it must have been something good.

#every time i write a baby fic im like #is it obvious that i know next to nothing about babies #rowaelin #my writing #tog

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cheekygreenty · 3 years

Note

Hi, I just saw your prompt list for Shadow&Bone!! could you possibly do No. 2 from Angst, but like with a happy ending? Like reader n Kirigan are togeather but then Alina's comes along.. just, please let be happy at the end. I like angst, but my heart can't handle sad endings 😢😢 thank you!!! ❤❤

Future- The Darkling x Reader

(Very very angsty with a happy (?) ending. It made me cry a lil bit writing it ngl)

You trusted him, wholeheartedly. At least that's what you told yourself every day since she came to the Little Palace; the place you had always called home, where you felt safe from the prying eyes of the public.

Yet now, the place was fueled by harsh rumors of him and her. Everywhere you went you could hear a whisper, nobody tried to hide it anymore, the words were always entirely devoted to your crumbling union;

'I thought they were happy'

We were.

'How can he and Alina not be together, it's destiny.'

I'm starting to think so too.

You didn't acknowledge it. Just put on a sweet smile and a brave face. Don't let them see you're hurting. Even in your own home, you had to pretend and lie, which at the end of the day, when you laid in an empty bed, made you exhausted.

He told you she meant nothing more to him than a mere weapon. But that was when she first came and when he still managed to make it to your shared chambers and would whisper sweet nothings as you fell asleep.

It was different now, on more than one occasion you caught a glimpse of them together, him looking at her the way he always looked at you. However much he claimed to be a good actor and manipulator, there was something there and he couldn't deny it either.

You hadn't confronted him about it yet fearing that if you did, the truth would hurt and sting and make all those rumors true. In addition, you haven't seen him in days and the last time you did, he told you to stay away from the wonderful Sun-Summoner.

The truth was you knew deep down in your heart that she wasn't at fault. That she was not the root of the problem. You constantly fought with yourself to stop any hatred you felt towards her. She was lovely, kind compassionate, and innocent. She didn't deserve to feel your wrath.

But with that came the confusion of who to blame. You or Him. It made you tired and weak. The smallest of tasks made you drained and tears would well in your eyes at the thought of having to live another day like this, a day full of questioning yourself and the man you loved more than anything in the world.

No matter how much of a strong person you swore you were, this was taking a substantial toll on you. He had become your support network and he knew it, he loved it. He always said he finally felt appreciated when you came around, that he wasn't alone anymore. He had conditioned you to be this way. When times got tough, he was always your shoulder to cry on.

No doubt that shoulder was now next to Alina. Perhaps they went on a horse ride, visited the Black Heretic fountain, or were enjoying a rendezvous next to the lake.

You didn't want to know, all that mattered was that he wasn't there with you when you were falling apart. Maybe you relied on him too much.

You wondered if he noticed the whispers too, or the way you'd been missing crucial meetings, or even if he noticed you wearing your red kefta more often, ditching the black once you'd heard Genya speak of making a golden-black kefta for Alina, per the Darkling's request.

That was a punch in the gut. It hurt more than him avoiding conversation with you or even his deterrence of touching you. He had bestowed his colors to her when not even three months ago he didn't know she existed. It had taken you a long time to gain his trust and don his signature black yet all she had to do was waltz in and show up. And it hurt.

And now here you were, training the next generation of heartrenderers, as you did almost every day. You had given your life to the Little Palace and its Grisha and this is how you were being repaid. Not even Ivan, who you had shaped into an excellent soldier, had looked your way lately.

'Excuse me Ms. Y/L/N I have an urgent request from the General' You whipped your head around to the young Grisha boy with an obviously hurt look on your face which he couldn't understand.

'Of course' you choked out and took the piece of paper from his hands and watched him in sorrow as he left.

Ms.Y/L/N? what happened to moya sovereignny? You were never one to uphold the formality, but this was just another blow to your confidence. You were no longer referred to as his other half which only meant your position in the palace was quickly dwindling.

You opened the wax-sealed envelope and took out the thick sheet of paper. There was a time when he himself would deliver the news to you himself and use it as an excuse to spend extra time with you.

'I cannot make it to the meeting with the King this evening, attend and report back to me anything relevant, no horse business'

You scoffed loudly, drawing attention from the young Corporalki around you and leaned on the table in front of you. Not even a please or thank you. With the note clutched in your hand and tears of frustration in your eyes, you stormed out of the Corporalki room and towards his war room.

You peeked through the open door and seen him. He didn't look at all busy as he chatted with Zoya, Ivan, Fedyor, and some other Squaller you didn't recognize. Zoya threw her head back in laughter at something Fedyor said but Aleksander kept his stony expression. You threw the door open dramatically and everyone froze.

'Leave us' you cautioned as Aleksander's onyx eyes looked right into your own.

Nobody moved but Zoya was the first to speak ' Y/N, we're actually in a meeting if you couldn't tell' while everyone nodded along, except him.

You never had anything against anyone in that room, but in that moment you couldn't help yourself and used your small science to bring everyone to their knees in front of you, except him.

'Leave us' His voice rang out in the midst of their sharp breaths and chest-clutching. They scrambled to their feet and left one by one, Fedyor quietly muttering 'moya sovereignny' as he passed you which filled you with some courage. The door shut and the sound echoed over the walls.

You threw the note across the room and let it hit his arm. 'Did you forget your manners General? Or does it only apply to the people you claim to love?'

'Funny you should say that Y/N, you haven't attended any meetings in weeks without providing a reason. You're making me look like a fool'

'I'M MAKING YOU LOOK LIKE A FOOL?!' Your tears were now streaming down your face, falling quicker than you could wipe them away.

He stayed silent and that broke your heart even more, he could've said something, anything.

'Aleksander, I'm trying to keep myself together for everyone, I'm trying so very hard to appear normal and happy but I don't think I can do this any longer. The whispers and the rumors, watching you and her-' You slid down the door and sat on the floor, head resting on your knees. '-It's getting to me.... and it's killing me.'

You thanked the Saints you didn't see his face, for the silence spoke for itself. He didn't deny anything or reach out to comfort you. I've lost him.

'All I wanted was a happy ending.' You laughed a sad laugh that pulled at his heartstrings. With your eyes still facing away from him, you didn't see his hand go up to wipe the lone tear that fell down his face or the slight shake in his hands as he did so. He had no words that would comfort you. He knew what he'd done. He'd been avoiding you ever since he realized it. He didn't want to see you cry or see how his actions affected you.

Telling you that it means nothing to him was of no use. You had it in your mind now, forever engrained around his name, the rumors wouldn't stop and Alina was still around. He truly felt nothing of importance for her. All she meant for him was a key to a better future with you.

He approached you slowly, getting down on his knees next to you. He took your hand in his and held it up to his lips. He never prayed, but right now he silently muttered words to all the Saints. Don't let her leave.

'I'm so sorry Darling. Y/N I love you so much.'

'But you love her more' You yanked your hands away.

'NO. no. Y/N. I swear it. You are everything to me' He had grown serious now, he wanted you to look at him. He missed you.

'Then explain why you're parading her around like a Queen, letting her wear your colors, probably sleeping in her bed'

'I have never toucher her in that way. I'm yours Y/N.' Please look at me.

You lifted your head and looked at his beautiful face. He too looked tired, exhausted. His eyes were red and puffy. Saints, I've never seen him cry.

'You will have a happy ending. I promise Darling' He took your face into his hands and connected your foreheads together. 'I promise. I'm doing everything I can to make sure you will, and even if I can't, I swear you will you and our children-'

Children. Aleksander never spoke of them to the point where you had settled with the idea you'll never have them. Something about the desperation in his voice made you believe him, Aleksander was strong, he never gave up but he also never sacrificed himself for anybody. Up until now, you didn't think yourself worthy enough to be saved in exchange for him.

'-I would give up everything to see you and them safe, away from harm's way. Right now, the world doesn't deserve them, but once I do what I have to do, I'll give you children. However many you want, Just stay. Please'

You were borderline hysterical as you melted into his embrace. Weeks of frustration and hurt disappeared into thin air. Aleksander held you so tight you were having trouble breathing but you didn't care. He held you all day and all night. All meetings and tasks forgotten.

He explained everything in detail, from the stag and firebird to what happens if things don't go to plan. He kept nothing from you, not even the stress and pressure he felt. You comforted him as he always does to you. You fell asleep together and dreamed of a life with a happy ending, one where you never had to doubt his motives, you dreamed of your future.

Taglist (if you want to be added, plz tell me!)

@theonelittleone @searching-for-gallifrey @lostysworld

@0-artemis

#shadow and bone #grisha #imagine #the darkling #the darkling x reader #alexander #alexander morozova #alina starkov #fanfic #ben barnes #general kirigan x reader #black general

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actuallysaiyan · 3 years

Note

Okay I just finished devouring your masterlist 😩🌊 But could I please have a Madara NSFW alphabet? Or Itachi? It's up to you but... 👀 (I just need the Uchiha men 🥲)

A/N: Awhh I’m so glad you enjoy my writing! I decided on Itachi for the time being, as someone else requested Madara ;) so look out for that one very soon, because I love the Uchiha men a lot too. There will be lots of Uchiha men content on this blog, that I can assure you!

A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)

Itachi is soft and caring, and he’ll clean you up and make sure you’re okay. He’ll bring a washcloth and softly clean up the mess the two of you have created. He’ll run you a bath if you’d like, and he’ll wash you and massage you. Then he’s going to tuck you into bed and snuggle closely.

B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)

Itachi isn’t very picky. He likes his body just fine, and while his sharingan is amazing, it can be a curse sometimes. Maybe it’s his hair. It’s something that he’s always prided himself in, even if it’s just something that is naturally beautiful for him.

Itachi is a sucker for pretty eyes and a kind smile. He loves watching the way sunlight hits his lover's eyes in just the way possible. He could spend forever just looking deeply into your eyes. And your smile is a reminder of how beautiful the world can be.

C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)

Itachi, like the rest of the Uchiha men, has a breeding kink. He gets very weak about cumming deep inside of you. But he’ll never do it without your permission. He’s going to make sure you’re okay with this before he does it. If you let him do it, he’s going to be so happy to share such an intimate moment with you.

For you, Itachi loves to make you cum as much as he can. He doesn’t always have all the time in the world to spend with you, but when he does get some free time, he loves making you cum so he can watch you come undone. It’s so sexy to him.

D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)

Itachi fantasizes a lot about you cumming on his cock. He spends a lot of time without you, so he just thinks about it at night when he’s lying in bed. It makes his cock so hard when he can imagine you bouncing up and down on it, and you’re moaning his name and he’s just so in awe. He really enjoys this alone time in his own mind.

E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)

Itachi has no experience prior to you, so you need to teach him a few things. He learns very fast and becomes an expert in no time. He knows your body and he knows how to treat you, so it doesn’t take long for him to know exactly where to touch you to have you panting and begging him to make you cum.

F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)

Itachi loves missionary or anything involving you being so close to him. He wants to hold you in his arms while he thrusts into you so slowly and sensually. He also loves the om position(you on his lap) and he’s a big fan of the spooning position too. Sometimes he loves lazy sex so he’ll get behind you and just thrust into you so slowly.

G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)

He’s not funny at all in the moment. He loves to be sensual and romantic with you, so he’ll praise you and call you cute pet names. Itachi wants you to know that you are well loved and that he enjoys every moment he spends with you.

H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)

He’s got some hair down there, but it’s pretty well maintained. He likes to keep himself clean shaven or at least well trimmed. The carpet does match the drapes of course, it’s very dark and black, but it’s not super coarse. It’s nice and fluffy.

I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)

Itachi is so romantic. He loves to kiss and caress you all over, and he’ll praise you. He wants you to know how much he loves you. You mean the world to him, and he needs you to know it in case something bad happens to him. He’ll hold you close and whisper sweet little nothings in your ear as he thrusts so slowly and sensually.

J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)

Itachi masturbates regularly when he can’t be with you. It goes hand in hand with his fantasies about you. He’ll use his hand and he likes to take it slow and draw it out like he does with sex. He’ll start to think of you at night when he’s alone and one thing leads to another, and then he’s pumping into his hand and moaning your name.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Itachi definitely has a breeding kink. It’s very strong within him, as he wishes to have his own family. He longs for that happy life. Itachi also loves spanking, dominating you(but he can switch too) and he loves marking you(so biting, choking, bruising a little). He’ll never get too rough with you, but he does love leaving little love bites and little bruises from where he grabs onto you when he fucks you.

L = Location (favorite places to do the do)

He’s a big fan of doing it in private on a bed. He gets all the time to draw out sex this way. If not, he knows it’s okay to have quickies in places that could potentially get you caught. Itachi is willing to risk that, but he’d rather fuck on a bed. He loves bathtub sex as well, as you can just be warm together and the water makes everything so much more fluid and it feels so good this way.

M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)

He needs to hear you say it. He loves it if you lean in towards him and whisper “I want you in me,” in his ear. If you start to rub his thigh and his chest, he’ll be pretty turned on. He also loves it if you start to get a little cheeky, so maybe if you bend over while wearing a short skirt or just flaunting your tits in his face a little.

N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)

Itachi will never do anything that will hurt you for real. He’s okay with some pain during sex as long as you are consenting, but he’ll never hurt you for real. He’s also not huge on urine play or scat, as he hates the idea of desecrating you. You’re beautiful, and he can just paint you with his seed instead ;)

O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)

Itachi is very weak for blow jobs. If you get on your knees and take his cock out of his pants and just start sucking him off, he’s going to cry out and tug on your hair a little. He loves it when you look up at him through your lashes while you deep throat him. He needs to stop himself from cumming right then and there.

He’s also a huge fan of going down on you. He’ll spend so much time between your thighs, just lapping at your juices and watching your reactions to the different techniques and speeds he uses. He’s very good at reading your body.

P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)

He’s almost always slow and sensual, but some nights he’s feeling a bit more hungry for sex. He’ll pound into you and make you scream his name, all while squirting all over him. He wants you to feel good, and he usually puts your pleasure above his own, but some nights he needs that release. He’ll always tell you beforehand.

Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)

They aren’t his favorites, but he knows sometimes that’s all the time he has with you. He’ll lead you to an empty closet or something like that, and he’ll pick you up so you can wrap your legs around him. Then he pumps himself into you and tries to challenge himself to see how quickly he can make you cum.

R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)

Itachi is game to experiment, but he needs to know you are willing to try new things before he does anything. He’s excited about trying new positions or new techniques, but he loves to hear your input on things as well. He knows you’ve got some good ideas, so he wants to use them.

S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)

He’s got amazing stamina. He can last a very long time, and he needs very little rest between rounds. He’ll fuck you all through the night and then some in the morning if you can keep up with him.

T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)

He’s into toys, but he loves using them more on you than using them on himself. He’s a little vanilla sometimes with sex, but if you want to use a vibrator on his cock while you make out with him, he’s not going to complain. He loves it when you take charge and use toys on him to make him realize how good they are.

U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)

Itachi doesn’t mind teasing from time to time, but it takes barely anything for him to melt at your pleading. He loves making you cum and pleasing you, so teasing you isn’t always in his plans. But he also loves the pathetic looks and noises you make when he edges you for so long. It’s worth it when you finally cum hard.

V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)

He’s not very quiet, but he isn’t super loud either. He loves to moan and make noise because it really feels so good. He’s not embarrassed about letting you know that he’s having a good time too.

W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)

Itachi loves it if you push his face into your tits while you’re riding him. He loves how soft and warm they are and he’ll kiss them and suck on your nipples and it’s honestly something that will probably make him cum so fast! If you want him to cum quickly, just bury his face in your tits.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)

He’s lean but muscly, and he’s very well built. His cock is very long, and has a nice girth. It’s not very thick, but still good for stretching you out. It’s probably about 9 inches and has a very slight curve to hit that sweet spot.

Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)

He has a normal sex drive. He loves having sex with you when he can, but he’s busy and he knows it can’t take over his whole life. Don’t worry, he won’t ignore you if you have needs that need to be met. He’ll take good care of you.

Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)

A long time. He loves to relish in the moment of just holding you in his arms and how peaceful everything is when you’re just there sleeping. You help keep him calm and comforted.

#writing #anon requested #reader requested #itachi uchiha #itachi uchiha x you #itachi uchiha x reader #itachi uchiha x y/n #itachi uchiha lemon #itachi uchiha smut #itachi uchiha spicy alphabet #itachi uchiha smutty alphabet #naruto #naruto shippuden #naruto headcanons #naruto imagines #naruto scenarios #itachi uchiha headcanons

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writingbywatson · 3 years

Text

Genshin Boys With A Dense Crush (Part 2)

Here is part 2~ so, the reason why I didn't include Bennett and Razor is the fact that I can never write for them, like IDK why but its just very hard for me. So yeah, sorry about that. Part 1 (Albedo, Childe and Diluc)

Chongyun

Dense + Dense = more dense

It was painfully obvious that Chongyun likes you but for some reason, he can’t quite figure that out for himself

But everyone around them knows

Xingqiu is actually on the road to writing a book about the two of you

Xiangling, Xinyan, Hu Tao, and Yan Fei are betting on how long until Chongyun realizes his feelings

Chongyun doesn’t know why he likes to see you every day, wants to have meals with you, and why he gets uncomfortable when he sees you with another person and smiling at them

Maybe it was the work of g-

“Oh I like them” -Chongyun one day when he woke up

He consulted his best friend Xingqiu about this and Xingqiu just placed his books down and said “dear archons finally, it was getting very painful to watch”

So the two started planning a cute little confession scenario

Somewhere Xinyan and Yan Fei are crying because they lost the best but Yan Fei is arguing that betting was illegal and has no ground in the law… Yan Fei, you betted with your conscience please stop

Anyway!

The pair of best friends decided to go with a simple type of confession because less is more in Xingqiu’s books

It was going so well, a cute dinner and all of that

“I like you Y/N, can we be more than that?”

Oh is that Xingqiu, Xiangling, Xinyan, Hu Tao, and Yan Fei spying on both of you from the bushes? Why, yes indeed.

“You want to be best friends Chongyun? But don’t you have Xingqiu as your best friend already?” - you with your ever so innocent voice and expression

Chongyun is frozen in place

Xingqiu, Xiangling, Xinyan, Hu Tao and Yan Fei are betting again this time how many times will Chongyun get a friendzone

Kaeya

Someone revive him

He can’t take your dense nature anymore

This is Kaeya after all everything he does allude to something so WHY WON'T YOU GET IT STILL

“Oh, Kaeya? You like someone!? Can you introduce me to them?” - you asking excitedly upon hearing his and Rosaria’s conversation

Kaeya was pretty sure he was describing you

Rosaria is holding back her laugh, she can't breathe… SOMEONE SAVE HER

“I love them but this dense attitude is too much!” - Kaeya as he slams his fist on top of Diluc’s bar

“Have you tried wooing them?” - Diluc as his wiping a glass down, he's so nonchalant about this situation LMAO

“HAVE I TRIED?” - Kaeya sounding very offended

“How about getting a white bed sheet and painting “will you marry me Y/N” on it?” - Rosaria

“Yeah, they leave me no ch-”

“Sit down, don’t embarrass yourself like a child” - Diluc pushing his brother down to sit

“HOW WILL I GET MY FEELINGS ACROSS THOUGH!”

“Just confess, normally… like… a normal person” - Diluc

Kaeya decided that in two days time he was going to confess to you, two days because he needed to make sure it was perfect

But the moment he saw you laughing with some random guy all the planning was thrown out the window

“Meet me in front of the church when the sun rises” - Kaeya to you when he passes by you at the corridor of the headquarters

When you arrived, he made you stand at the flight of stairs in front of the church while he went down

He kneeled with his right knee touching the ground and he pulled a very neatly folded white sheet from his pocket

He unraveled it and wrote, “WILL YOU MARRY ME Y/N?”

But even before you can react a thunderous shouting can be heard and a chuckle

“WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU DOING!? I SAID CONFESS NORMALLY!” -Diluc

Thoma

I’m going to try but still little info on this new pyro husband

Thoma is a very understanding boy

He likes you so much that he's willing to wait

But damn has he been waiting long

He decided he was going to confess to you today as well!

“Y/N! I like you!” - Thoma

“I like you too! You are like my best friend!” - you

Every time this happens Thoma stress eats.

Ayaka is giggling because he has never seen her friend like this

He's trying his best for you to like him, he cooks for you, takes care of you, guards you, protects you…

WHAT IS HE DOING WRONG!?

“You know the festival is ongoing” -Ayato as he watches his sister’s friend mop around like a puppy who has been kicked. “Why don’t you try confessing properly and straight-forwardly there?”

That gave him an idea

He dragged to the talisman-wishing thing and told you that you two should make one

When the both of you were done, you should each other what you made and to your surprise, Thoma made a drawing of the both of you holding hands

“It’s not us being best friends forever” - he clarified

“It’s me hoping to spend many more years beside you as your lover.”

Venti

Barbatos aka Venti the Bard has been singing a lot of love songs lately

Especially when you were in the audience watching

He always likes your smile especially when you were watching him

So when the two of you were strolling around near the church of Monstad

He decided that he was going to confess today

Years of being alone and he finally get what Vanessa told him about meeting the right person

“Y/N, I love you-”

“Aww, Venti, I love you too!”

“Really?!” - Venti very excitedly

“Yeah! I love you as a friend! We’re like besties!”

Dvalin felt that

Andrius felt that

Hell even Vanessa felt that from Celestia

“Oh I got to go, bestie, I have something to do! See you tomorrow!”

Lately, the winds of Monstad have been depressing?

“I don’t understand! I thought they liked me back!” Venti his chugging his alcohol while Diluc looked at him in irritation

Diluc wants to kick him out but Venti is Monstad’s archon so he decided against it

“Venti! There you are!” - you

Venti hears your voice and because his drunk his happy instead of upset

He throws himself at you in an attempt of a sloppy hug

“Y/N! I love you~”

“I love you too, we are fr-”

“NO! I LOVE YOU LIKE A SIGNIFICANT OTHER I LOVE YOU! THAT TYPE OF LOVE THAT IF YOU ASK ME TO FIGHT MORAX I WOULD!”

Xiao

When Xiao first had these feelings he was confused

He lived a long life and this was the first time in his life where when he sees someone his chest becomes constricted and warm

“Xiao! Do you like traveler!?” - you excitedly

Xiao felt a tightening in his chest not that good type but am i being stab right now type of tightening

His answer would usually be along the lines of no and he can’t have relationships with mortals

He usually has a lot more patience with you compared to others but hearing you say that he looks good with someone else just made something in him snap

He didn’t mean to shout at you nor did he mean it when he said you should leave him alone

That’s why he's waiting for you at Wangshun Inn, his loneliness grew into worry when after 2 days you weren’t back yet

Upon eavesdropping around he also found out that no one has seen you and your last known location was Mt. Hulao and he immediately began to worry because that place was prohibited to humans

“Are you looking for someone?” - Mountain Sharper appeared behind Xiao as he reached the top of Mt. Hulao. “Are you looking for a mortal perhaps?”

“How did-”

“-That mortal is pretty noisy, they don’t stop talking and they know you.”

Oh, the warm feeling in his chest is back because they were talking about him which means that they weren’t angry at him!

“Where are they!?” Xiao would realize and I swear to you his ready to break every amber rock around Mt.Hulao

“Calm down, they are currently collecting Qingxin flowers”

Right on cue, “XIAO!? IS THAT YOU!?” he heard your voice from behind him, when he saw you, he immediately rushes to you and hugs you

“What are you doing here!?” Xiao would ask, his voice was raised only because of relief

“Oh, I got lost! And Moon Sharper here saw me, we ended up chatting and I guess I forgot the time, he shared so many stories about y- WHY DO YOU LOOK LIKE THAT ARE YOU HURT!?”

“I’m alright… I just… I m-miss…”

Moon Sharper is just looking at this scene and he knows he's about to spill the hottest tea next time the adeptus (idk plural form okay) have a dinner party

Xingqiu

At first glance, it might look like that he isn’t affected at all

But internal his boiling

WHY WERE YOU SO DENSE

IF IT WEREN’T FOR HIS CLAN'S TEACHING AND WHAT NOT HIS PROBABLY ABOUT TO ASK YOU FOR A FIGHT

“You’ll make a great husband someday Xingqiu, I know it! Your future wife would be so happy!”

“I want you to be my wife though”

“What was that?”

“NOTHING!”

He knows he needs to move so he can win your heart but how can he when you were dodging every advance he makes

What is more frustrating is that YOU ARE NOT EVEN DOING IT ON PURPOSE

As an author he wants to experience romance first hand, so he tries to be romantic about it but this was frustrating

He decided to pull his last technique from his sleeves

He lent you a very romantic book and between one of the pages he inserted a paper that read “I wish for you to be my muse.”

If that doesn’t work Xingqiu is going to ask you to fight him

Zhongli

Zhongli, Rex Lapis aka Morax has lived thousands of years

Yet this is the first time he encountered someone so dense at first he taught you were just kidding and pretending but when he described what he likes in someone which was pertaining to you

You simply said “WOW THEY SOUND WONDERFUL AND YOU MUST REALLY LIKE THEM BECAUSE YOU SOUND SO IN LOVE” at his face with genuine awe, there was no sign of you being flustered and whatnot

Hu Tao was there to witness this and the younger female had a good laugh when she witnessed this

Zhongli is now praying to Guizhong for help and patience

He first wondered if the reason for such behavior was because you dislike him but it wasn’t the case because you would always smile when you see him

Which makes his knees very weak

In heaven, all the dead gods are laughing at him

He has lived for so many years and yet he doesn’t know what to do because he wants to spend years with you

But a part of him says this isn’t right because his an immortal and you were a mortal, someday him being a former god would drive an enigma in the future

That’s why he was also hesitating on his part

“Zhongli, look-look! A merchant from Monstad gave me a Cecilia!” - you snapping him from his thought, he's a tall man so you had to tip-toe to put the flower in his hair

“There you look even prettier now!” - you smiling up to him

As you were withdrawing your hand, Zhongli grabs it and places it in front of his lips

“I love you Y/N”

222 notes · View notes

ererokii · 3 years

Text

Pretend I Am || Zhongli

note: hi! This is super indulgent for some reason because I just wanted to write this so bad. Thank you @reddriot and @etegomanere for betaing!

Warnings: spoilers for archon quests (?) angst, insecurity, identity crisis

WC: 5.1k

Synopsis: After his first love joined dust once again, Zhongli can’t help but believe she’s still here, through you.

Staring into a mirror wasn’t the same as it was before. An image was put into your head, your mind playing tricks upon tricks that got you dizzy just thinking about it.

Many tales of the God of Dust were passed down from generation to generation. Your family seemed to be fond of her stories, especially hearing about the creation of the Guizhong Ballista.

The more you heard of her, the more you wanted to be her. She was your idol as a young child. A woman building something was not commonly heard of at that age, but it was possible.

Now at the ripe age of 24, you despised hearing of her.

Glaze lilies.

How horrid, yet so beautiful. Delicate shades of blue sprouting up at you, with a deeper meaning behind the petals that saddened you. Staring down upon them, you were drawn to them despite having harsh thoughts of these flowers. When the sun went down and the moon took over, you would be home and have glaze lillies in your vase by the window.

Amber eyes would stare at you from the hallway, drinking in your appearance. The funeral consultant, Zhongli, would look on with a rather perplexed and sorrowful expression. The amount of times he found you with Glaze Lilies by your side was enough for a pain to form in your chest.

And that’s how it started. Something as simple as a flower was able to ruin your own image.

Accidentally slips of the name would be heard, causing your head to perk up at the sudden change. Not long after, formal apologies would be sent your way, gloved fingers would intertwine with yours, thumbs rubbing your knuckles.

It felt as if you weren’t enough. Hearing her name felt like a spear being thrown through your heart, ironic because the one saying her name was Rex Lapis himself.

Many times Zhongli would go on a tangent, speaking about the era eons ago; the two gods ruling over Guili Plains. It never bothered you, but by the way he spoke so highly of her, how his voice got more soft to the point where it sounded like he was whispering; you knew he wasn’t over her.

And all you could do was listen with a sad smile and nod your head to the things he spoke about.

In Zhongli’s eyes, you were beautiful, ethereal, and intelligent.

Just like Guizhong.

Your words seem like idle chatter in the back of his mind as he peers over at you from the sofa in the main lounge of your shared house. Your back to him, hands moving to grab things. There’s a slight downward curve to his lips, his gloved finger tapping away at his knee as if concentrating.

His golden eyes take notice of the dress you’re wearing. A shade of white with intrigue designs at the bottom. The forsaken flower that seemed to the base of his problems, shined like gold in his vision.

With slightly widened eyes, he leans forward, his hand balled. His calm breathing changes to something shaky, a small pant leaving his mouth. His vision becomes cloudy, tears threatening to spill past his lower lids. The Archon wants to reach out and grasp, wanting to make sure she’s safe forever.

But dreams could hardly become reality.

“Zhongli,” she whispers, a concerned look plastered on her face as she turns around to gaze at him. “Why are you crying? What’s wrong?” He recognizes the sleeves from her dress; something he made poked fun at her for being too big. But for some reason, he can’t see her features. All he can take notice is the Glaze Lilly tucked behind her ear, holding a strand in place.

He’s unable to say anything and blinks, the tear trickling down his face as he stares one more time.

“Zhongli,” you call out for once more, taking a seat beside him on the sofa. “What’s wrong, my love?” you whisper, cupping his cheek.

“I’m sorry.” His voice is raspy, eyes looking down at the floor. “I’m sorry..”

“W-What are you even sorry for? What did you do?”

And he doesn’t tell you. He composes himself and says he’s out for a walk, alone.

From that night on, he never brought up what happened. But you weren’t stupid; you knew what was going on.

It was growing harder for you to stare at your reflection. It felt as if your face was a lie— like you were being lied too. The longer you gazed at the mirror, the more you got confused. In the eyes of everyone, they see a young adult woman with unique features that could make her desirable to any man in Liyue.

But in your own, you couldn’t even see yourself. All you could see was the stem, leaves and petals of a Glaze Lilly. No matter where, no matter what, it was there.

She was there— someone you looked up to in your childhood years.

Your fingers hesitantly stroke the glass of the mirror, feeling the cold underneath your fingertips. They trace the outline of your cheek, to your eyes, to the curve of your nose. It wasn’t you.

“Who are you pretending to be?” you whisper, taking a step back as it becomes clear.

Staring back at you was a faceless woman, though she wore a frown identical to your own. Her clothes were drastically different from your own. Gold and white silk robes adore her upper body, the only thing your eyes can grasp. The woman seemed strangely distant, something that you couldn’t quite comprehend, something that wasn’t you.

Your hand shakily lifts to your face, your skin warm to the touch. Your chest heaves slowly, deeply inhaling as you exhale, pinching the skin of your cheek. It feels all too real.

Your hands travel over your shoulders to your chest; the clothing of your night time wear does not feel the same as the silk robes she is wearing. It feels too real, yet the person in front of you threw your sense of reality for a loop.

You admire your hand, staring at the palm and the back. It looked as if you were first staring at your limbs like you never have before.

“Guizhong,” you whisper, one hand gripping the counter of the sink, your body leaning forward to stare closely. A yellow stem catches your attention, eyes gazing at the flower in her hair. Mesmerized, you place your hand on your head, feeling for the petals.

In the reflection, she has a petal in between her fingers, rubbing it gently. But you— you’re rubbing nothing but a few strands of your hair. Disappointment runs through your veins, hand dropping back by your side.

Your mind is swirling with thoughts that scare you. The feeling of not being able to recognize yourself was driving you up the well. They were hallucinations, you knew that. You wanted them gone.

You wanted to be able to stare at yourself, to truly be able to do that and speak with confidence and say it’s you.

Now you aren’t able to do that.

Who are you?

You never told Zhongli how you felt about yourself; you didn’t want him worrying. Chances are he probably will never know.

A night out was something you desperately needed and that, Zhongli gave you. Not one for fancy things, you told him just going to Wanmin Restaurant would be enough for the two of you.

It was back to the good days when you first got with him. Laughter was shared between the two of you, looks of love and adoration was sent your way. His hand resting on your thigh, giving it an occasional squeeze as he speaks about the interesting history about Liyue (even though you practically knew everything already).

When it’s your turn to speak, you speak with confidence. He loved hearing the words effortlessly flow from your mouth. You knew how to hold up a conversation and draw someone in.

Not to mention how extremely intelligent you were. You talked about inventing things that no man has ever thought of but never brought yourself to do so. Maybe there could have been a weapon to protect Liyue from monsters now with the Archon gone.

“And then if that’s even possible...” you trail off, a sparkle in your eyes as your hands are lively, emphasizing your points. Zhongli can’t help but pay more attention once you talk about inventions. Maybe you could build something like the Guizhong Ballista? But then again, she was one of the smartest women in his lifetime.

He takes his eyes off the woman beside him for a second, watching the waiters pass him with trays of delicious Liyue delicacies being served to other customers. He glanced back over, freezing in his spot.

Guizhong continued to talk, letting out a sigh of defeat, her head hanging forward that showed her being displeased. “It seems almost impossible at this point.”

Instead of getting emotional like the last time, he lets out a hum, then chuckles. “You’re an intelligent woman,” he tells her, looking down at their plates of food that’s almost wiped clean. “I’m positive you’ll manage it.”

“You really think so, Morax?”

“Huh?” That catches his attention, his head snapping back over to the woman. “What did you say?”

“I said you really think so, Zhongli?” Your eyebrows are furrowed, lips pursed ever so faintly as you shift in your seat. “Are you okay? You seem out of it.”

He’s unable to answer, staring down at you with a frown. From your view, he looks disappointed. “Forgive me, I don’t mean to make you repeat yourself but...did you say Morax?”

You’re confused. You have no idea what he’s talking about.

“No,” you start, tilting your head to the side faintly, “I didn’t say Morax...maybe you’re hearing things. We can go back home if you’re not feeling good.”

“No, that won’t be necessary.” He lets out a sigh, closing his eyes for a split second before reopening. “Maybe I’m a little tired. It’s okay, darling. I’m fine really. Let’s just enjoy ourselves for the night.”

The calm and collected man did not seem okay, but you decided it was best if boundaries weren’t pushed tonight. “Alright,” you say with a small smile, grabbing his hand, squeezing gently. “If you say so.”

“I know so.” He leans closer, his hot breath against the shell of your ear, the hairs on your neck standing up. “You seem to doubt me on many occasions. Why is that?”

You scoff lightly, rolling your eyes as you turn your head to face him. “Oh stop it. You know I never doubt you.”

“If you say so.”

“I know so,” you say, copying his words moments prior; cupping his cheek and stroking his skin with the pad of your finger. “I love you, Zhongli,” you whisper, pressing your lips against his in a gentle kiss. His eyes flutter close, his hand dropping to rest on your waist, reciprocating the kiss.

And I…

That little incident of him hearing his old name did not go unnoticed. Throughout the day you would catch him staring at you like he was lost. His mouth would be slightly parted, eyebrows furrowed to the point where a small wrinkle formed in between them. Whenever you called him out on it, he would lightly shake his head to get his sense of reality straight again before brushing it off.

“Zhongli? What’s wrong?”

“Nothing, my love.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes.”

Of course this worried you to no end. Maybe he was tired?

Maybe he was looking at someone?

Someone who wasn’t you.

A night stroll was something you both enjoyed immensely. The soft light of the moon gazing down at you, lighting up the dirt path of Dihua Marsh. No words were spoken between the two of you, rather enjoying the serene silence.

Your eyes focus on the trail in front of you, the leaves of the Sandbearer tree wisp in the cool air of the night. As you venture forward, you lightly kick the pebbles that rest by your foot, watching them roll forward or to the side. You earn a chuckle from the older man beside you; his eyes focused straight ahead.

There’s no definite place you’re headed too. At this point, you might as well be stuck here for the rest of the night.

At this time, monsters roam around, but tonight feels different. It feels as if you don’t have to watch every empty space of land to make sure nothing comes at you. There’s a churning in your gut, but you can’t put your finger on it.

Your eyes catch onto the river on the left side of the trail, the reflection of the moon evident in the rippling water. “That’s pretty,” you state softly, looking up at your lover, “don’t you think?”

“Mhm. I do believe it’s very beautiful,” he says, voice gruff and firm. His ponytail moves with every step he takes, the auburn color at the tips glowing slightly— something that wasn’t out of the ordinary.

“This area used to be pure, untouched by wandering monsters, bearing their hands on any living thing. That of course was what happened before the rest of the Gods decided to take seat upon the divine.”

Divine was Celestia. You heard numerous stories told by storytellers that stay in the small restaurant in Liyue. Each story was unique— not like the other. Many citizens of Liyue often got into bickers when it came to telling the ‘true’ story.

The God of Salt’s people refused to call the Geo Archon by his name. Morax was basically poison to them. They believe Havaria was murdered out of sheer jealousy. But of course, that wasn’t true.

When you first heard the story by none other than him himself, you were in awe. Despite the brutality and casualties placed upon god after god and innocent citizens, it left you with nothing but questions.

“Man is known to let their greed take over every ounce of them. Of course, me being ruler over Guili Plains at the time, I had no choice but to protect my people...then the death of Guizhong–” He stops talking, tongue peeking out and licking his lower lip.

You take notice where you’re at now.

A small field of Glaze Lilies.

You watch his shoulders rise slowly as he inhales deeply before exhaling, letting his head fall back as he turns his face to the sky, eyes closed.

“I’m sure you remember me speaking about the Memory of Dust correct?” You nod to his question, following him quite closely as he begins to walk once more, hands behind his back.

“She gave it to me a few months after we met. It’s something no mortal can handle. Even I wasn’t able to open it. I spent months on end, trying my best to open the mystery that was contained inside. It was truly a challenge. But of course, she was a woman with extreme intelligence. Guizhong was the brain for the two of us.”

And thus Zhongli continued to speak highly of her. He shared the moments when the God of Dust. Cloud Retainer and himself would meet up for tea and lunch in Mt.Aozang. He spoke when they would take walks together in Dihua Marsh, walking through the glaze lilies; listening to her sing at the blooming flowers.

Hearing him talk about his previous lover set a fire within you. Insecurity ran through your veins when he would smile, bringing up something else that came into his mind. It made you feel as if you weren’t enough at this very moment.

But, it made you feel loved.

A warmth blossomed in the pit of your chest, your body feeling light and relaxed. The way his eyes sparkled to the way he gestured— everything just seems so perfect. Your lips curled up in a smile as you gazed up at him lovingly, your heart skipping a few beats to the nervous feeling in your stomach.

You were in love.

It was as if he was praising you. You were the intelligent woman, the most beautiful being in Teyvat all those years ago. Generous, kind, thoughtful. Each of those words, you thought it was for you.

You were going deeper and deeper into a hole you knew you wouldn’t be able to get out of. Love was something that was meant to be cherished, but was also the more cruel thing a human being can go through.

Love made people blind, and you were one of love’s victims.

“She sounded amazing,” you comment, running your hands through the spot of glaze lilies you’re currently sitting in, the cool green grass rubbing against the palm of your skin.

“She was extraordinary.”

You hum in return, closing your eyes as a cool breeze whooshes by you, goosebumps littering your arms as you shudder under the cold. With the wind, the blades of grass danced under the air, the nearby flowers swaying.

Zhongli peers down at your seated form with the flowers. He watches with intent eyes, looking at the way your hands hold the plant, careful as if it were a form of porcelain.

He can’t help but feel sad as you stroke the blue petals with the tip of your finger, a faint smile on your lips. He pondered to himself; why were you staring up at him with a dumb founded look of love? Surely he wasn’t saying anything great at that moment.

He can recall the way you stared at him with half lidded eyes, like you were dozing off in your own dream state.

It throws him for a whirl. These past few weeks messed with his head— more than anything has in his life.

“Glaze Lilies were her favorite, huh?” you spoke up, bringing it closer to your nose, sniffing as the aroma filled your senses, a pleased sigh passing your lips. Your fingers mess with the stem, no thorns popping out from it.

“They… yes indeed they were.”

It’s silent for a moment before a hum breaks the silence.

Sitting in a small field of Glaze Lillies in Dihua Marsh, you hummed softly to yourself as you become one with the flowers in your mind. If all of Teyvat was silent enough, your melody could reach all ears; the young and the old.

A sheer screen of white flashes before Zhongli’s eyes, blinding the archon for a split second before his eyes snap open, a small pant leaving his lips.

It’s no longer night. The sun has risen for the day, the rays shining down on him.

His arms feel slightly heavy as he gazes down, notice the black and gold lines littering his arms; the color of Geo glowing with each second. He checks his palms then the back, taking notice of the white robe he now wore along with his slightly baggy pants and no shoes.

Unsure, he slowly lifts a hand to the top of his head, feeling a sharp pole coming from under the hood. His horns stood up, tall and proud for everyone to know that this was Rex Lapis.

It’s quiet among the trails in Dihua Marsh. Something catches his eye as he turns his head, noticing the small traces of civilization.

“Odd...everything was in ruin after the war,” he mutters to himself, the dirt rubbing against his bare feet.

Instead of being near the field like he was moments ago, he’s rather far away; the patch of flowers in the distance. Morax is confused as to how he ended over here but decided not to comment.

With each step he takes, the rocks buried in the ground poke at his feet, making him wince faintly in pain. He most definitely recalls wearing shoes before coming out in the open.

Everything now seems to be beautiful, at peace. Nothing was out of the ordinary, the old statues were up, not a single crack on them.

The walk seems to last a millennia to the God of Contracts but eventually reaches the green patch that leads to the blooming flowers.

The first thing he takes sight is the clothed back of what looks like a woman who happens to be sitting in the field. The second thing he notices is a flower of Liyue that rests in her hand.

As he gets closer, his ears catch the melody the woman is singing. It tugs at the strings of his heart, yet drags him deeper into the hole of curiosity .

The red baggy robes are the things he recognizes on the spot. The sleeves are far too large for this lady, the white belt that is loosely wrapped around her waist that gives the idea of carelessness; but the way she moves, the way her voice reaches his ears.

There’s no doubt in his mind.

He gets closer and closer with each note she hits before he’s only three steps away from her. His pupils are dilated, his hand reaching out to grasp.

It’s only seconds until he feels a droplet trickle down his face, dropping to the grass underneath him. One tear turns into two, then three until he’s quietly crying behind the woman, remembering every note.

His arms that glowed have now dimmed, faded from its bright color. His head is hung forward, shoulders slugged as he lets out a shaky breath, bangs brushing against his forehead.

“You know, you don’t have to stand right there and stare.”

“P-Pardon?” Morax stutters, lifting his head up to see the woman’s head turned faintly to where he can see the outline of her nose.

“I said,” she started, her voice soft yet demanding, “you don’t have to stand and stare like that. You can approach me too.”

“My mistake,” Morax clears his throat, one hand wiping away the clear liquid from his cheek. “I hope I didn’t frighten you.”

She lets out a laugh that makes his heart flutter. “You didn’t scare me. I was able to sense you when you were back there by the old tree. You have a very powerful presence, Morax.”

“I’ve been told that before by old friends of mine.” He peered down at her, taking in the shape of her nose. “Might I ask, what’s your name?”

“My name?” She asks, not giving him what he wanted. “And why might you need that?”

“Well shouldn’t every god know one another?”

She’s silent for one second before nodding. “I suppose you’re right.”

“My name is—“ she tells him but he doesn’t quite catch it. He asks for it once more but does not hear it again. Morax rubs his ear gently before noticing that she’s standing up; back to him.

“It’s nice to meet you, Morax. I think we’ll get along just fine,” her bare feet move in the grass blades, her body beginning to turn.

The wind gets knocked out of his chest, lips parted in shock. A face he’s been trying to remember for eons— isn’t the same as it was.

Her eyes sparkled, a gentle smile on her lips as she approached him. Her features were unique, something that looks awfully familiar but cannot put his tongue on it.

“Don’t you think?” Her head tilts to the side, lifting a Glaze Lily in front of their face. His bright eyes can’t even stare at the plant, fixated on her face that he seemed to see every day of his current life.

“I…”

“It’s okay. You don’t have to answer me just yet, Zhongli.”

“What?” He asks in a whisper, voice barely audible to her ears. “What are you talking about?”

“I know, Zhongli.”

There’s a dull ache in his frontal, a hand clutching his forehead with a wince, eyes squeezed shut.

So many things hit him like a meteor. His head is spiraling, his heart feels as if it could burst out of his chest at any second. All he wants to do it lay down on the floor and let everything wash away. That seems like the best option.

“Zhongli...”

His eyes flutter open, adjusting to the now dark setting of Dihua Marsh. Clear liquid cascades down his face as he quickly scans the area. The old traces of civilization were now gone, the area nothing more than flora and fauna; the statues broken down.

“Zhongli.”

Your voice catches his attention, your body standing right in front of him, holding a glaze Lilly in front of your face.

It clicks in his brain for only a second when he sees the tear slipping down your face.

But the thing that throws him off the most is that beautiful smile you’re wearing.

Smiling through the pain as you told yourself many times in the past month. Your sad eyes aren’t even staring at him, rather looking at the petals that seemed to weigh as much as the rocks that surrounded the area.

Seeing your current state set off a small alarm within him. His hand as if automated too, reaches out and cups your cheek, a gloved thumb rubbing against the soft skin.

“What’s wrong?”

“This whole time–” Your voice is shaky, unstable as you steer your gaze to stare into his golden eyes. “–I was confusing myself to no end. Every night I would walk up the mirror and try to figure myself out but I never could. When I closed my eyes, I couldn’t see anything but this...this flower. It was all I saw.”

When you spoke, your smile never faltered. In all honesty, it was starting to get him a bit frightened at how calm yet broken you were.

“It wasn’t me.”

“Maybe you’re just tired?” he suggests, worried about your wellbeing. “You might be stressing yourself too—” You cut him off with a shake of your head, reaching up and cupping both of his cheeks, the stem rubbing against his skin.

“When you close your eyes… I know who you pretend I am.”

At this moment, his vision is blurry as more tears form before slipping past his lower eyelids. He’s unable to see your face, blinking the tears away, but more form in their wake. He’s unable to see you.

“I don’t understand what you mean...”

“I know who you pretend I am, and it’s okay.” Your lips brush against his own for a second, your tears mixing with his own.

Through his tears, he catches a glimpse of your face. To him, you look devastated. Your lips are down in a frown, your head hung forward with your body hunched just a tad, hands by your side. To him, you look done.

But you, you’re far from it.

The circumstances of the now don’t affect you as they did when you first caught onto the strange behavior. The longing glances, how he would spend his hours of the night trying to open the dumbbell that contained her wisdom. Not to mention the slip ups of her name being said rather than her own. Even in his sleep, you could hear him calling for her once in a while.

“I’m not upset. It took me a while to accept it but...I’m ready.” You bring the flower to your nose, taking a whiff then presenting it to him.

Once again the archon stares at you with a dumb founded look, something that was strange to see on him. He can’t say anything as you look forever different in his eyes.

It’s like your body was split in half, making two completely different people. The right side staring at him was Guizhong. His first lover and former ruler of the Guili Plains. Her eyes were sad with a smile, her body stiff as all she could do was stare at him.

The left was his current lover. Someone who went through months of denial, confusion and hurt. Your eyes shone as you offered nothing but a flower and your love and devotion to him.

Two women that happened to be one.

Yet one outshined the other.

“I’m ready to be who you want me to be.” Your hand runs up his face, tucking the stem of the flower behind his ear that now takes a seat in his black hair. “No matter how you see me as, my love for you can never change.”

Zhongli feels his heart flutter at your words and the small laugh that slips past your lips when you catch his look. Yet each time he closes his eyes, your face becomes blurry before going normal. Your clothes change, and so does the style of your hair. Everything changes once he closes his eyes to get his reality set straight.

I know who you pretend I am.

“Even if I’m not Guizhong, I’ll be her for as long as you need...until I die. I’ll always be here, Morax,” you whisper, gazing at his lips before pressing yours against his. Your arms slither around his neck, cradling the back of his neck.

Morax melts into the kiss, his arms encircling your waist bringing you flushed against him.

In his mind, he’s standing in Guili Plains with the sun shining down at him, the God of Dust currently in his arms as their people cry in joy that they found a safe place to live— two caring gods to watch over them forever and protect them from harm's way.

All the worries were thrown out the door as the now is most important to him.

But now, he’s standing in a field covered with the most beautiful flowers known to man, their petals swaying with the sudden harsh wind that hits against him and his lover.

After eons of waiting and in sorrow, Morax now has what he desired the most once the chaos of the Archon War was finished. To hold the one most important close again.

Unbeknownst to him, a single tear slips down your face as you begin to revel in the new identity you gave yourself. Pain will continue to surge through your veins but you could care less.

If Morax was happy, you will continue to be happy for him.

For you are Guizhong, the God of Dust. Lover of Morax.

I love you, Morax.

And I love you too, Guizhong...

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#zhongli x reader #zhongli #genshin impact x reader #genshin x reader #genshin impact zhongli #genshin impact imagines #zhongli imagines #genshin imagines #zhongli x reader imagines

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alastaircarstairsdefenselawyer · 3 years

Text

romeo must die

this one-shot is based on the song Romeo Must Die by Gabrielle Aplin, I highly recommend listening to it! shout out to @eugeniaslongsword for introducing me to it :) i even borrowed some lyrics from it haha. it is also inspired by the entire playlist I made, "being treated badly by someone doesn't make you love them more"

content warnings: past toxic/unhealthy relationship, the uncomfy 6-year age gap between Alastair and Charles

Masterlist | Read on AO3

"Alastair, may I speak to you privately for a moment?"

Alastair looked up from what he was working on. He was in the library of the Institute, along with Cordelia, Thomas, James, Matthew, and Christopher. They were searching for any clue as to how Lucie had done what she’d done or what Tatiana and Belial were planning. Alastair wasn't entirely sure how he got roped into the ordeal, but it seemed as though Thomas suggested him as an extra set of eyes, and Cordelia latched onto the idea.

"No," he said curtly, returning to his reading.

"Excuse me?"

"I said no. I'm quite busy at the moment." Alastair spoke under his breath, not wanting to draw the others' attention. How many times had Charles barked the same words at him, swatting him away, hacking away at paperwork or planning his next step in his career? The words sat bittersweet in his chest.

"Surely you could spare a few moments."

"I certainly could. But I do not wish to." Charles had a way of getting into his head and twisting his words and his feelings. It was not an experience he wished to revisit. It was better here, with an audience. It had also been easier in the infirmary, knowing that he held all of the power. His father had made him feel the same way, he thought bitterly. He understood now that what he'd done at school was not only to protect himself from the bullies. He wanted to reclaim the power stolen from him by his father; he wanted for once in his life to hold power himself. He hadn't yet come to the realization that holding that kind of power did nothing but harm. It was of no use, anyways, because it didn't matter how much he perfected his tongue and his wit on the other students at the Academy, he was never able to use it when it counted. Not with Elias, and not with Charles.

"It's fine if you need to take a few minutes, Alastair,” Cordelia said gently. All of the eyes in the room had come to rest on the two of them. Now he wished he’d spoken louder.

“It’s alright, Charles was just leaving.”

He had hoped that Charles would give up and leave knowing that everyone was watching him, but he was determined. He grabbed Alastair’s arm. “It’ll just be-”

Alastair stood, but pulled his arm away. “Don’t touch me.”

In a flicker, Alastair saw it: the anxiety began to set in. Charles began to realize that he would not be able to play his usual tricks. “Why are you acting like this?”

“I believe I was quite clear when I told you I don’t wish to speak with you. You’re the one who can’t let this go.”

“Must you act so childish?”

He rolled his eyes. “Must you always call me childish for thinking for myself instead of catering to your every whim?”

“I don’t understand. You said we were fine.”

Alastair sighed. Perhaps for a moment, he thought that was true. For just a second, he thought there was a world where he and Charles could be friends. But Alastair had decided that he would no longer call people who hurt him his friends. “Yes, well, I lied. I wanted to let you down gently, but it’s clear to me now that it must be spelled out for you. How shall I put this? You and I are past our dancing days, Charles.”

“But-” He stammered, searching for words. “What happened with Grace Blackthorn wasn’t my fault.”

“Maybe not. But what of Miss Bridgestock? Am I to pretend that what happened with Miss Blackthorn was not the same as what happened two years earlier?”

“You told me many times that you took no issue with that, that you understood.”

“I understood what you told me, which we both know was never the full truth. I was a sixteen year old desperate for your affections, and the fact that you truly believe I never had any issue with your arrangement is proof that you never genuinely cared about me or listened to my thoughts. I told you in the infirmary that this wasn’t your fault because I thought it’d ease the pain, but I lied. And I don’t have time to sit here and watch you cry over it.”

Alastair wished that watching Charles become flustered would have been more enjoyable. Instead, all he wanted was for this to end. “You- you’re different than when we met. You’ve changed. You’re cruel and callous, I don’t understand how I could not see how heartless you were until now. You are everything that everyone claims you to be. How am I to even know what the truth is when it comes from your lips?”

There was a time when those words would have cut deeply into him, eating at his every insecurity, but Charles mistakenly assumed that Alastair was the same person he was last July, with the same insecurities. “When we met, I was fourteen years old. I’ve grown up, and it is time for you to do the same. It’s been six months, Charles. You need to stop writing me. If that makes me heartless, I don’t care. And if you wish to know the truth, the truth is that the moment you leave here, if I never see your face again, it still will not be long enough.”

Charles stared at him for a long while, unable to find a proper retort. In the end, it was Matthew who stepped in. “Charles, I believe it’s time for you to go.”

He obliged, finally turning to leave the library. As he began to walk away, however, Alastair knew that he was not finished. His heart beat a little bit faster at the thought of such a confession, and faster again when he realized who would hear it, but there was no piece of parting with Charles that he wished to regret.

“Wait,” he said. Charles froze and turned to look at him. “I know it’s unlikely that you have it in the cold depths of your soul to care, but let the record show that I would have given you everything. I would have given you my life, all of the love and trust that I had to give, and then I would have given more. And you gave me nothing. So the next time you’re pondering my heartlessness, you ought to wonder what that means for you.”

Finally satisfied, Alastair did not wait for Charles to turn and leave again to return to his seat and pick his reading back up. He waited for a moment, but he couldn’t shake the feeling of everyone’s eyes on him. He stood once more, opening his mouth to speak, but the words were caught in his throat. Instead, he walked out of the library in silence.

Finding the nearest balcony, he attempted to steady his breath.

“Are you alright?” He heard from behind him. Thomas. “Sorry, I didn’t mean to startle you.”

He shook his head. “I just needed some air.”

“That doesn’t answer my question.”

Alastair sighed. He backed up against the window and slid down to the floor of the balcony. “I know- I know that everyone sort of knew already, but… by the Angel, I feel so pathetic.”

“You’re not pathetic,” Thomas told him, sitting down beside him.

“You were right, of course you were. I was so… taken with him, back in Paris. I couldn’t see him for what he was. I was so naive, so foolish. I just- After everything I’ve seen, everything I’ve been through, how did I not realize-”

Thomas put his hand on Alastair’s knee. “You wanted to see the best in him. After everything you’d seen and been through, you wanted to believe that there were still good and honest people in the world. And there are. I’m sorry that he was not one of them, but that does not make you foolish or pathetic. It makes you… kind.”

“I bet you’d never imagined describing me as such before.”

“It seems you’re full of surprises,” Thomas teased. “But that’s not true. I always saw the kindness in you, even back at school, when you did everything to keep it hidden.”

“As you can see, my ‘kindness’ has never gotten me very far.”

“You were out of practice. Following me on my reckless nighttime patrols, that was kind. More than kind. I don’t think I ever thanked you for that, for risking your life to protect mine.”

“I didn’t do it for gratitude.”

“And yet I owe you mine nonetheless.”

“I can’t go back in there, you know.”

“What do you mean?”

“I can tolerate you and your friends hating me just fine. But if any of your friends give me even an ounce of pity- well, we’ll see just where the limits of my kindness lie, won’t we?”

Thomas stood up, offering Alastair his hand. “Pity comes from those who cannot even begin to understand what you’ve experienced. For what it’s worth, I don’t think my friends will pity you. But if they do, you can ignore them. For Lucie.”

Alastair sighed and allowed Thomas to pull him to his feet. “Fine. Let’s get back to reading.”

“Speaking of reading, do you have the entirety of Shakespeare’s canon memorized, or only the lines you believe may pop up in conversation?”

“Excuse me?”

“‘For you and I are past our dancing days,’ it’s Romeo and Juliet, isn’t it? It’s the only one of his works that I got through.”

Alastair froze. “You haven’t read Hamlet?”

“I tried.”

“Othello? King Lear? Macbeth? Midsummer Night’s Dream?”

He shook his head.

“That’s impossible. And James is friends with you?”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Wait until my sister finds out you haven’t read Hamlet,” he warned, starting towards the library with urgency in his step.

“Wait, don’t- I just don’t like Shakespeare! What’s so wrong with that?” Thomas’ attempts at reasoning were futile, however, a welcome distraction from all of their recent sorrows finally taking hold.

Thanks for reading!! This was self indulgent af lol. I'm not to sure whether some people only wanted to be tagged in my social media AU, so if that's the case I'm sorry & please tell me!: @stxr-thxif @chaos-and-starlight @lifewouldbebetteronmars @littlx-songbxrd @dianasarrow @eugeniaslongsword @bookswitchcraftandcats @jamesherondaleofficial @thomas-gaypanic-lightwood @livingformyself @anarmorofwords @foxglove-airmid @writeforjordelia @sapphic-in @thecodexsays @fortheloveofthecarstairs @alastair-esfandiyar-carstairs1 @shadowrunner2000 @thewarthatsavedmylife @fair-childd @icouldnotask @shadowhunting-hooligans @melanielocke @clarys-heosphoros @kiwichaeng @lightwoodsimp @thecrimsonsorceresss @theenchanteddreamer @adams-left-hand @yozinha-z @ipromiseiwillwrite @skirtsandsweaters @goodoldfashionednerd

#alastair carstairs #charles fairchild #if you're a charles apologist just block me #thomas lightwood #thomastair #tlh #the last hours #cw toxic relationship #coi spoilers #fanfiction #fanfic

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americasmarauders · 3 years

Text

in your eyes - Bucky Barnes

author’s note: so remember when I said I wouldn’t write Bucky anymore, only that one time? yeah, so I said, you know, like a liar. I saw the first episode of falcon and the winter soldier and that was all it took for me to fall into the ‘bucky barnes simp’ hole all over again. I made an entire one shot based on a single piece of a dialogue from the first episode. the story starts right before the first episode and ends right after the last. I spend an entire month and a half working on this please give it some love.(pls reblog i beg of you) Huge thanks to @batarella and @glorified-red for beta-ing this. ily <3 hwo knows, if people love it enough I might give a part 2.

summary: her quiet job in the library got louder when Bucky walked into her life. (Bucky Barnes x telepath!librarian!reader)

WARNINGS: i do write a bit about addiction in this, if it makes you uncomfortable, please do not interact. it’s not heavy, or graphic, but the reader does experience abstinence. be warned. no spoilers for tfatws, but i do reccomend you watching it.

words: 11,416

mastelist

It was all so loud usually. When she first discovered her ability, it was like there were suddenly a thousand voices yelling inside her head all at once. She remembered falling to her knees, clutching her ears and crying out as the voices shouted different things at her.

Then the Professor came, promised her to help control her own mind. She didn’t want to trust the guy, even if he said he had the same power as her--even if he said everything would be alright. But the headaches were getting worse, the voices were getting louder and louder. She took him up on it and left her home to live in his boarding school.

She met interesting people and--at the end of her stay--she achieved what she was there for. It took 4 years of her life, constant nightmares from reading too much of her colleagues' minds, and several isolated afternoons - more than she wanted to admit. Nevertheless, she could finally go to a concert or have a normal college class without crying from pain.

She lived a normal life after her time at the Institute. She mostly ignored how her teenage years were far from the ordinary, or how sometimes she could hear a random thought from the person sitting next to her if the thought was loud enough. There were days when everything got too much, days where she lost control. She would stay in her house with noise cancelling headphones on (even if it didn’t work like that, it somehow helped) just going on throughout her day as quietly as possible. Tom knew she would get sick, even if working at the library rarely made her go into her lockdown modes.

The library calmed her in a way. The thoughts were rarely disordered and loud, more focused and quiet. It fascinated her that even in their thoughts, people respected the quiet environment the library required. But sometimes, someone would appear with a troubled mind, something books couldn’t even soothe.

There was a regular now, he was one of those people whose thoughts were always all over the place; she couldn’t pick them apart, words would fly through her head - words she often associated with the book he was reading. She wouldn’t know, it was Nancy that talked to him most times.

He always sat at the same old, worn out armchair, talking with the older people in the library as if they were the only people he was comfortable with. Sometimes, she would be restocking the books and see him looking at old newspapers. She never got the courage to talk to him. She figured her curiosity wasn’t enough to muster up the bravery needed to utter a word to him.

Tom was on leave that day. He was stalling his doctor’s appointment, telling her his back pain wasn’t that serious, but she knew better. Every so often she would hear a whisper of pain in her head and she knew her boss wasn’t alright. It had taken her months, but she finally convinced Tom to go and get his back looked at.

So she was working the counter that day: checking books off, admitting them, and then separating them so she could reshelve the books the next day. It was pretty boring work, repetitive, and she wondered how Tom kept busy all day when she finished all of her chores in a couple of hours.

“Excuse me,” she heard, standing up as a reflex. Her eyes trailed up to the person standing in front of the main desk. It was the Loud Man (that was what she had taken to calling him). “I want to check this off.”

“Yeah,” she said, breathless. She was hearing too much from him, too many random words. It made her feel dizzy. “Yeah, I’ll do that.”

She took the book from his hands, her fingers brushing slightly at his leather gloves, her thoughts suddenly got even more flooded at the slight touch. She could feel a rising nervousness in him, so much it blended with her own nerves. She quickly retrieved her hand, hoping she hadn’t seemed impolite.

She sat back at her chair, looking at the book. “The Hobbit, huh?”

“I’m re-reading it,” he said, his eyes sincere, “I read it when it first came out.”

She looked at him funnily. “You read it in 1937?”

His expression froze, the slight smile morphing into a frown, his loud thoughts got louder with a single word: ‘lie’. “That’s a funny joke.”

She smiled at him, not taking his comment too seriously. “I’m a funny gal.”

He laughed, but his smile didn’t reach his eyes. It was like he was only checking off a box of social convention. It quickly faded to an impatient expression, and she could tell he wanted to get out of the situation as quickly as possible.

“I haven’t seen you here before,” he mentioned.

“Oh,” she muttered, “I’m usually reshelving things, Tom operates the front desk but he went to the doctor. I’m the only other person who works here, so,” she trailed off, “I’m Y/N.”

“Bucky,” he responded, his face slightly tensed. His eyes hovered over everything in the library, as if he was trying to find something wrong in it.

“Nice to meet you, Bucky," she handed the book back to him. "It's due next week. Don't be late with it.”

“I'll return it tomorrow,” the words slipped from his mouth.

“Fast reader?” she asked.

“Got nothing else to do,” he shrugged, the word ‘lie’ once again swimming in her head in the mess of thoughts she received from him.

He gave her one last smile and disappeared into the library. His thoughts got distant, but they lingered in her head. Flashes of pain, bright white lights, and screams littered her mind. She shook her head trying to get rid of them. It rarely worked, not with thoughts so persistent.

Her head started to pound as the thoughts got more intense somehow. That never happened before, usually she could only hear people that stood near her and she was sure Bucky walked all the way to the back - he wasn’t close to her in any way.

Her hand shook as she fished out her headphones. She put them on and connected them with her phone. Playing her music was a hopeful distraction, detering her brain enough to quiet down everything. She closed her eyes and breathed in and out slowly, just like the Professor had taught her. He used to say a quiet and strong mind was the key to ward off stray thoughts.

It helped clear the thoughts, the mess of words only leaving whispers of broken thoughts in the way. She grabbed those and put them away, shoving them inside a mental box of lost thoughts. She did that with all the others, it helped keep her mind organized.

She didn't know how much time had passed when she opened her eyes. She always took too much time clearing her mind, she would forget the outside world. Peter used to poke fun at her for that, drawing penises on her face. When she came to her senses she would always run after him, ready to tackle him to the ground. It was always useless: you can't outrun Peter.

She noticed Bucky leaning on the frame of the front door. It was getting darker outside, an orange hue illuminating his eyes perfectly. Her breath hitched for a second before recomposing herself.

“Good nap?” he asked, the smallest smirk on his lips.

“I wasn’t napping,” she smiled, shaking her head. She checked the clock and saw it was way past closing time. It didn’t go unnoticed by her that he had gone out of his way to stay with her when he should have gone home. “Why’d you stay?”

“Everyone left,” he said, “and I thought it wasn’t safe to leave you in a trance alone in an empty library.”

“I wasn’t in a trance,” she took her headphones off, resting them around her neck, “I was… clearing my head.”

He looked at her funnily, “Busy day?”

“It’s been weirder than usual,” she responded, smiling. She sat back down and logged off the system.

“How weird is working in a library?”

She scoffed, lighty. “You have no idea,” she smiled mischievously.

She picked up her things, keys in her hand. She left the front desk, going to Bucky’s side. “Thanks for staying,” she said, “You really didn’t have to.”

“It’s no problem,” his hand brushed the back of his neck with a timid smile, very unlike his general physique and stance, “I had nowhere else to go.”

She could feel his thoughts bubbling underneath her skin, wanting to come out and flood her brain with confusing images and words. Whispers of faint words echoed through her mind, soft enough that she couldn’t distinguish what they were.

“I find that hard to believe,” she said, words slipping out of her mouth faster than she could stop it. Old habits she supposed. She could always keep thoughts of other people to herself, it didn’t seem fair to them she could hear their thoughts, the least she could do was keep them to herself. But when it came to her own, they just came out of her mouth before her conscience could stop her. “I mean,” she started, “a guy like yourself - good looking and all - must get a lot of people just, um, throwing themselves at you.”

He breathed out, an awkward expression on his face. She could hear one word clearly: ‘lie’. “I don’t date a lot,” he stated, “Not really my thing.”

She changed her approach to the conversation, sensing the uncomfortable energy he oozed. “Oh,” she muttered, “It’s okay, I mean, I don’t date a lot either. I barely leave my flat actually,” she brushed a single piece of hair out of her face, “I hate crowded spaces, and I have just the weirdest habits. You know, not a lot of people are into women who work at a library and barely make minimum wage,” she mumbled, her hands in her pockets restraining her hands for gesturing too much just like she always did, “I have a lot of issues too, at least that’s what the Professor used to say to my therapist before each session, which is fair and--oh God, I’m sorry, I just rambled.”

He chuckled (an actual chuckle), a full light-hearted laugh, one that rumbled throughout his chest. “It’s fine,” he said, “I like listening to you talk.”

She heard the words ‘like’ and ‘quiet’ shoot through her mind. She smiled at him shyly, looking down at the ground. “I don’t know how to respond to that,” she laughed awkwardly, “Thank you again, for waiting and being, I don’t know, just nice, I guess.”

He smiled, a slightly bigger smile then he had given her the entire time they’d interacted. “Yeah, yeah,” he shook his head, “No problem.”

Both of them walked out the door. She turned and locked it, then pushed a button that activated the security systems of the building. “I guess I’ll see you tomorrow then,” she said whilst shrugging.

“Yeah, yeah,” he went down a few steps of the main staircase. “I’ll see, uh, see you tomorrow.”

She saw him go down the steps, listening to the faint echoes of his thoughts in her head. She felt the tips of her mouth curl up, watching him go as the sun set on the horizon. She hadn’t felt that before, that sense of mystery, of wonder and curiosity. His mind was in shambles, broken pieces of it laying in every corner of his brain, and she heard all of it. It compelled her, even if it felt completely wrong to be so enthralled by someone’s mind.

She felt inadequate for liking his mind when he didn’t even know she could listen to it. It wasn’t the first time she felt that way. She remembered a boy from the shop near the Institute, she loved hearing his thoughts. She rarely left the Institute, but when she did she would always sneak to the store to buy a popsicle as an excuse to admire him. Sometimes he would smile at her and her brain would malfunction for just a second, his thoughts flooding her and overwhelming her every time that happened.

She anticipated it was only a matter of time before that happened with Bucky again. She didn’t exactly know if that was a good thing, if she should indulge in the latent curiosity and table herself further with his mind - with him.

The sun set in the horizon, the orange glow fading to the blue of the night sky. Walking down the streets, she could still hear remnants of his thoughts inside her head, his imprint already set on her. She wondered how long it would take for it to fade, if it would fade and if she wanted it to. #

He gave her one last look before walking away from her. She could feel him uncomfortable, it lingered in her head longer than it should. He lingered in her more than he should. Her eyes followed him on his way out of the library. His mind was confused and tired, it left a trail of breadcrumbs calling for her to solve the mystery that was.

Tom’s doctor ordered maximum rest. Apparently, the problem in his back was more serious than both of them anticipated. The doctor ordered as much rest as Tom could have, meaning more breaks and leaving early. That also meant she had to do double the work - she wouldn’t mind at all had she not left a pile of returned books to shelve.

She put her headphones and drove the cart full of books through the library all afternoon. Usually not a lot of people came in on a Monday afternoon to check out books, most were local teens that were there to study or make out. She always pretended not to know which ones were there to actually study or not; the thoughts always flew out to her when they were there to snog, most times it was hard to contain the shit-eating grin that would want to rise.

She felt someone touching her shoulder. She jumped slightly, startled at the touch. Turning around, she saw Bucky, his thoughts overwhelming her. She rested the headphones around her neck, pulling out her phone to pause the music. “Hey, Bucky,” she breathed out, trying to contain the images and words in her head, “What are you, um, how you doing?”

“I’m good,” he smiled at her, looking down at the ground, “Um, Tom’s not at the front desk and I gotta return the book.”

“Oh yeah,” she took the book from his hand. It was still warm from his touch, “I thought you wouldn’t come today, to be honest.”

“I said I was,” he looked at her intensely, eyes narrowing in suspicion.

“Well,” she smiled awkwardly and averted her eyes to the ground, “People sometimes say things they don’t mean.”

She didn’t realise what she said until it was out of her mouth. She remembered how he was uncomfortable around her, and how he would think about lies just as he told her something. Embarrassment flooded her senses, she felt heat rising to her cheeks.

He looked at her weirdly, as if he was analyzing her. The more he looked, the more she listened to his mind. Words of suspicion floated around, she swallowed dryly and nervously at the thoughts. Echoes of screams and a crushing sense of guilt came through, she wondered what had happened for him to think of that. She wondered if she was the one person that caused him to think like that.

“I’ll return it for you,” she said, motioning for the book, trying to get the attention off of her.

“Yeah, thanks,” he said, “D’you mind if I get another?”

“Yeah, go ahead,” she said, “I’ll wait for you - at the front desk, I mean,” backing away from him, she accidentally bumped into a bookshelf, “Not, um, not any other way.”

He stared at her and nodded slightly. She turned around and walked to the front desk, cringing at her inability to mutter coherent words to him without stumbling in the middle of a phrase. Something about him made her lose all of her composure, she didn’t know if it was the constant flood of thoughts and memories she listened to from his mind or just him making her nervous.

She sat down at the chair behind the front desk, and rubbed her face, as if it would rub the embarrassment out of her. Sighing, she returned the book for Bucky. Just as the day before, his thoughts lingered in her head, images that meant very little to her were calling out.

“Why’s Tom not here?” he asked. She looked up at him, his blue eyes piercing through her. It was the first time she noticed his eyes, and somehow, it made everything worse. Instead of whispers, she heard everything clearly. Fools said the eyes were the windows to the soul. She knew better: someone’s eyes told her what they were thinking, what they were feeling. And she could tell Bucky felt a lot.

“Um,” she looked back down to the book she just admitted back, moving it to the pile of books to reshelve. “He’s on leave, doctor’s orders.”

“Back pain was somethin’ serious then?” he responded, handing the new book to her.

“Yeah, I told him to get that checked out, turns out I was right,” she shrugged, getting the book, her eyes still fixated on the computer. She felt the leather of his gloves graze the tips of her fingers, and a searing pain shot through her head. She brought the book down to the table, closing her eyes hoping the pain would stop. “Brave New World? Revisiting the classics, huh?” she struggled to keep a whimper from emerging from her mouth.

“Yeah,” he breathed out. She heard a whisper of concern run though his head, “Um, are you alright? You don’t look very well.”

She shook her head, faking a smile, pretending she wasn’t getting a thousand thoughts from everyone in the library- especially Bucky’s thoughts - blasted at maximum volume on the speakers of her mind. “Just a bit of a headache.”

“It looks serious,” she could hear the leather from his gloves squeaking as he rested his hands on top of the counter.

“I’ll be fine,” she gritted through her teeth. It had been years since she was last in a position like that, her head throbbing with thoughts that weren’t hers. “I have these all the time.”

She heard his thoughts of concern louder than the others. “Are you sure you’re alright?”

She dismissed his question, not wanting to dwell on his concern longer. “Here,” she handed the book back to him, her other hand closed in a fist, “it’s due next week. Don’t be late with it.”

“I won’t,” he said, his tone slightly strained. “I’ll return it tomorrow.”

“Okay,” she shook her head, her eyes closed and teeth gritted, choosing not to question how he would return that book tomorrow. She fisted both of her hands, her fingernails sinking in the skin of her hands. “Yeah, it’s fine,” she whispered to herself.

She heard his footsteps moving away from her, she sighed in relief, hoping it would mean her mind was going to calm itself and the headache would fade. Instead, the footsteps grew closer to her once again and then the leather of his gloves was grazing the skin of her arm, helping her stand up and guiding her somewhere.

“Imma take you to the hospital, doll” Bucky stated, not leaving room for discussion.

“No,” she tried to shake off his hold, “My shift’s not over, I can’t leave.”

“You look terrible, and you’re clearly in a lot of pain,” he grabbed her arm again, “You need to go to a doctor.”

“Doctors won’t solve this,” she once again freed herself of his hold taking a step back from him. More of his thoughts flooded her mind, a mess of memories and guilt overwhelming her. “They never solve anything,” she breathed out, her voice breaking, “I just need to rest.”

“Doll,” he dragged, his tone temptive and careful.

“No doctors,” it was the first time she had looked in his eyes willingly. There was a sort of weird determination in her eyes, one that came with years of terrible experiences with doctors. Hundreds of appointments that left her more desperate than before, endless tests and thoughts heard that she didn’t have any fix, as if she was broken in the first place.

His jaw tightened and his intense eyes fell upon hers. Her throat dried up under his gaze, her head unbearably heavy with his thoughts and hers. “Fine,” he growled, his hands moving to the pockets of his jacket, “Fine.”

“I need to go back to work,” she backed away from him, slowly. “I--I’m sorry,” she whispered, not sure why she was apologizing to him.

“It’s okay,” his jaw was still tight, his eyes were still intense lingering at her. She couldn’t even appreciate his gaze at her, and how if she was a normal person,--if she didn’t have that goddamn gene--she would have let her heart skip a beat and feel coy under his gaze. “It’s your choice.”

There was a stubbornness to his stance, something that told her he wouldn’t be backing down so easily. She couldn’t go to any doctor, she couldn’t risk anyone finding out. She didn’t want to go through the tests and the never-ending questions, whether it was out loud or not. There was only one person who could possibly help her, and she refused to go to him.

She backed away from him quickly, turning around and heading to the front desk once again. Her headphones found their way to her ears, and she started to blast her music at full volume, hoping, or rather praying, it would help ease her headache. She put her phone in her back pocket, grabbed the book she had just returned.

The cart wove between the shelves with ease under her direction. She could still feel Bucky’s presence within the library, it was like carrying an iron ball tied to her feet at all times. Unlike the day before, he was more troubled, he felt more things and more intensely. It was too much. She wondered what happened for him to be so restless.

The music hardly helped, it somehow made it worse. She couldn’t shake the tangled thoughts and think for herself, and the music disturbed even more. She dropped her headphones, frustrated. Her head pounded, desperation rose in her. She refused to call Professor, he would not help, he would only rub in her face that she shouldn’t have left. ‘This wouldn’t have happened if you stayed at the Institute, Y/N,’ she could imagine him saying if she closed her eyes.

“Are you better?” turning around, she saw Bucky, his hands inside the pockets of his jacket. His eyes were focused down, his shoulder slightly hunched. It looked like he was ashamed of asking her if she was alright, almost as if it was his fault that she was in pain. It was, but she didn’t hold it against him. She was certain it wasn’t his fault.

“Not really,” looking at him, she analyzed his expression. His jaw was tense, she could see his hands were fisted inside his pockets, “I just need to sleep.”

He nodded slightly. “You sure you don’t want anythin’?”

Her head tilted slightly and her mouth quirked up a little. She could tell he wanted to charm her, she heard the word bounce around her head faintly--the guilt was louder, though she could barely hear anything else--and she would lie if she said she didn’t like his attention. “I am” her hands entangled together, her knuckles tight, “but thanks for the offer.”

“Yeah, yeah” he breathed out, his hand brushing the side of his leg in a nervous habit. “I need to go,” he pointed back at the door, his face stony.

She sat cross legged on her bed, her eyes closed. There were candles around the room, the lighting dim and warm. The smell of incense was strong, it swallowed the entire room. It was necessary, she needed that to ground herself to the real world, and not lose herself in her mind.

Since calling Professor was not an option, she tried to take matters into her own hands. She was going to untangle the knot of thoughts Bucky had left in her head by herself. It could potentially be dangerous, if she wandered too far who knows what could happen. She had taken the necessary precautions, but she had only done that before under the careful and judgemental eye of the Professor. It was the first time she was doing it alone, it scared her to think what could go wrong.

She breathed in calmly and concentrated on the knot in front of her. Her head was a whole other world, it could be molded to her will, she felt safe in it. Now, it was a black empty space, the only thing filling it was herself and the pulsating mess of thoughts Bucky had gifted her.

Kneeling in front of it, she carefully picked apart superficial thoughts, setting them aside. They didn’t matter to what she was there to do, they were only random words and snippets of his day-to-day life that she was sure were not the ones causing him so much pain.

It didn’t take long for her to reach what pained him. It was surprising to see the amount of thoughts in front of her, usually it was much less. People tended to blow things out of proportion often, little things could cause a world of hurt to themselves. Bucky seemed to take a lot of pain, underestimating his grief. A typical mentality of someone who lacked the confidence, who didn’t trust themselves enough.

She picked a single memory and entered it.

The lighting was dim, a yellow glow swallowed her. The room was dirty and disgusting, the tiles that were once white tinted an yellowish gray. It looked like a room used for medical procedures, judging by the sheer amount of medical-like instruments littered around the desks. There were no calendars in sight, she had no way of knowing when the memory had happened.

There were at least 5 or 6 people in the room, all surrounding a metallic chair. She approached the scene, carefully. Standing beside the chair, she saw Bucky.

He couldn’t be much older than he was when she met him. His hair was slightly longer than it was currently, just brushing his forehead. He was shirtless, his skin glistening in the faint lighting of the room. His hand was tied to the chair. His temples bruised from something she hadn’t figured out yet. His chest moved violently, struggling to breathe properly. And his left shoulder? There was a red swollen scar there. She doubted the wound was fresh, more like reopened. Maybe they tried putting a prosthetic there and it failed. It was likely they hadn’t administered any painkillers in the procedure, and she felt anger boiling inside her at the thought.

“James Barnes, 3255...” he trailed off, muttering under his breath. His eyes were halfway closed, it looked like he barely could keep them opened.

“Попробуй снова,” try again, one of the doctors said.

Her eyes lingered on the doctor that had just spoken. He looked evil, and she felt in her bones he was. His smile was wicked as his eyes lingered on Bucky struggling to catch his breath tied to that chair. All of the doctors looked sadistic and malefic. She felt goosebumps flood her skin, disgusted by the situation.

The machine started whirling. An appendix lowered into Bucky’s left eye, another lowering to his right temple. Someone put a protection on his mouth, and she could see Bucky trying to free himself from his ties. Something told her, even in an altered state of mind he was already conditioned to know that noise and that feeling were bad news. She swore she saw his eyes flicker to hers just before everything started.

The screams - his screams - bounced on the walls and filled her soul in a terrifying way. Tears came to her eyes as she carefully studied what was happening to him. His hands formed fists, his knuckles totally pale on his flesh hand. His eyes were shut violently, his mouth open in a painful way. She wanted to reach out and touch him, but she couldn’t. She wanted to hug him and take him out of that awful place, but she couldn't. It was all a memory, it already had happened and she couldn’t do anything about it.

The doctors recited words in russian repetitively. Her eyes traveled to the doctor holding a red notebook. The wicked smile never faltered, completely ignoring the man in pain in front of him. She felt a urge she had fought so hard to suppress: she wanted to invade their brains, pick them apart and tear them down from the inside. She wanted to scream and shout at them and destroy everything in the room with a single thought. The fact that she was inside a memory and couldn’t physically change anything bothered her little. The anger and sadness she felt were real.

The machine stopped humming and Bucky stopped screaming. When he opened his eyes, she saw something that utterly terrified her. His eyes were empty, devoid of emotion, very much unlike mere seconds before. They were wide open, focused forward, looking beyond the doctor that was hovering over him.

“Soldat?” one of the doctors asked, a wicked smile forming on his lips.

“Готовы соответствовать,” ready to comply.

The room became blurry and she was sucked out of the memory. She stood there in front of the knot of thoughts. A feeling of inadequacy overwhelmed her, and she willed herself out of her own mind. She shouldn’t have done that, not without his permission. He didn’t even know she could hear his thoughts, much less explore the memories he had left with her.

She gasped for air as she came back to her senses. Bucky was much more complicated than she had anticipated, and the guilt he carried around with him wasn’t blown out of proportion and unwarranted. He felt as if things he had done, whatever those things were, had been his responsibility. But she knew more about the mind than him, she knew that that person she had watched be tortured was not him. Those eyes told her nothing, and his eyes told her everything and more. Those eyes were from someone who was a puppet, stripped of free will and agency. So maybe his guilt was warranted, but it didn’t mean it was his fault.

She rubbed her face and laid in her bed, looking up at the ceiling. Her heart raced inside her chest, the adrenaline of doing something so wrong settling on her. She would have to be honest with him. She let a shuddery breath, as she realized she was at the point she avoided when meeting people. The fear of rejection was crushing and familiar and with time she realized it was easier to push people away, not forming connections deeper than trivial than to explain what she was. But Bucky was different, she felt it in her bones. And she wasn’t willing to let him go. #

Tuesdays were fuller than Mondays, but only slightly. Maybe one or two more students came in, trying to get ahead of the curve and not procrastinate their studies more than necessary. The amount of work she had was enough to keep her busy throughout the day, even without Tom’s help.

She hummed the song in her headphones, weaving her way through the shelves, puting the few books that were returned that day back where they belonged. It was the part of her job that gave her the most pleasure. It gave her a sense of control and order, something that had lacked almost her entire life, especially while she was at the Institute. Professor had controlled everything back then. He controlled her and Peter and all the others to be something that most would not have chosen to be if given the choice. It made her feel helpless and tiny. But she had freed herself from that reality, much to Professor’s dislike. And now she could happily find her control in tiny things, like putting books back on their shelves.

“How come I always come when no one’s at the front desk?”, her headphones fell to her neck as she turned around to look at Bucky. He wore a shy smile on his face, clutching two books tightly in his gloved hands. His thoughts were quieter that day, but still present and loud. She doubted it was enough to give her a headache, but it was enough to leave a mark on her mind.

“Well, I’d say it’s just your luck,” the corners of her mouth quirked up. “Wanna check those out?” she pointed at the books in his hands.

“Yeah,” he breathed out. She started walking towards the front desk, Bucky at her tail. “So, are you better?”

“Yep,” she nodded, getting behind the desk and taking the books out of his hands, “Told you I just needed to rest.”

“Doll,” his head tilted, his eyes carefully analyzing her. She heard worry bounce around his head, “you looked like you were about to drop dead.”

She shook her head, a smile creeping its way to her face. “It’s more common than you think, it’s fine, Bucky, really,” dismissing his worry, like it was the best way to earn his trust. “For whom the Bells tolls? Really diving into the classics, huh?”

“Need some comfort,” he shrugged. “It’s been 80 years since I read these, it felt like the time to re-read.”

“80 years,” she dragged, “You look a lot younger.”

His face became briefly stony, his brain going haywire for a second before he relaxed and gave her an awkward laugh. “You’re a lot funnier when you’re not in pain.”

“Aren’t we all?” she slid the book over to him. “It’s due next week, don’t b--”

“Be late with it, I know,” he completed, “I’ll return it tomorrow. Like always”

She heard words of charm and flattery from his mind. It was a timid voice saying it, if she had been distracted she wouldn’t have heard it. Her eyes trailed downwards, her smile tiny and shy. “If I didn’t know better, I’d say that you’re lying.”

“How’d you know better?” his eyes narrowed at her and his head tilted to the side. She found it absolutely charming that he did that when he was confused.

“I read minds,” she said, seriously, her face impartial, very much unlike mere seconds before.

“That’s funny,” he laughed, pointing at her.

She opened an awkward smile at him, looking carefully at his expression. His mind told her he thought she was pranking him, being funny to charm him. She wasn’t. “I know you think I’m trying to charm you,” her eyes looking at her feet, her fingers entwined in a nervous habit, “but I’m not,” she finished, whispering.

She could hear confusion clearly in his thoughts. It wasn’t exactly at how she could read his mind, more to why she was telling him the fact. “I can hear your thoughts very clearly, they’re very loud,” she whispered. After all these years of experience with this power, it never got easier telling people about it. “And I didn’t think it was fair to listen to your thoughts - you think a lot you know? - all so loudly and clearly,” She couldn’t look at him, her eyes were still cast downwards in shame, “If you want to, I can explain how it is, we can go for a walk or whatever.”

She could feel his intense gaze on her skin, she didn’t dare to look up. Disappointment was one of the things she hated the most, one she had dealt with a lot. Seeing it in his face would surely break her heart, even if only a little bit. “Fine,” she heard him say it, airly, “But you’re paying.”

She looked up and his expression was impassive. But his eyes were twinkling with a sort of curiosity and wonder that could only mean good things. A weird sort of relief washed over her. She let out a sigh, her features relaxing. “Great,” she brushed a piece of her hair out of her face, “great,” she breathed out, “I just need to close this place.”

“I’ll wait.”

“Tell me what that boy’s thinking,” he said, pointing to a little boy by the pond feeding the ducks happily.

Her eyes trailed to the kid, trying to focus on him. It was an exercise she hadn’t done in a while, since she had left the Institute really. “He’s happy he’s with his dad,” she reported, “he doesn’t see his dad often and he misses him.”

“What about the dad?” his hands were in his pockets, his gaze locked on the dad sat on the bench just behind the kid.

“He’s guilty he doesn’t spend enough time with his son,” she added, her eyes following the posture of the man. His eyes were fixed on his son, watching his every move. It was clear he felt some sort of guilt towards his son, and it was easy to assume that by his stance alone--if you were observant enough. Bucky was, “He works two jobs to pay the child support. He can’t find time between them often.”

“How do I know that you didn’t just meet those people and they told you their life story?” Bucky questioned, his gaze intense and locked on her. They stopped beneath a tree, orange sun rays peeking from between the leaves.

“It’s the first time I've ever seen them,” she plopped down beneath the tree, crossing her legs childishly, “I barely leave my apartment.”

He stared at her, his gaze strong and judgmental. Huffing, he calmly got down and sat beside her, his legs spread out in front of him. He crossed his hands on his lap, and her gaze locked at his left hand. She wondered if the arm was still the same as the one she had seen in his memory. That arm sent chills down her spine, it was intimidating and terrifying, the red star staring at her menacingly. “Why, though?”

“I can’t, really,” she shrugged. She looked up, her head tilting to the side, considering her words. “I have these lockdowns when I’m surrounded by too many people. It hasn’t happened in years but,” her eyes closed, the memories of the last lockdown she had flooding back at her. She saw her younger self falling to her knees in the middle of the Institute’s lobby, screaming and clutching her ears, “but it happens, and I’d rather not go through that. I’m not in speaking terms with the person that can help me and I’ll do anything to not talk to him again.”

His lips formed a thin line. A hum trembled his chest, his head resting on the tree behind them. “How much have you seen from…” his jaw clenched, his voice quiet and hesitant.

“Not much,” she dragged. “I stopped after I realized that I, um, that I was…”she found she couldn’t complete the sentence under his strong gaze. “It wasn’t fair to you for me to see anything, not without you knowing.”

“What did you see?” he gritted through his teeth, his eyes watery and sad.

“I saw,” she gulped, her voice straining with emotion as she looked deep into his eyes, “I saw you, um, tied to a chair. You were so out of it,” she shook her head, tears flooding her eyes, “you were mumbling your name and some numbers. And then,” she sighed, picking up strength to continue, “and then they - they broke you.”

“What else?” he growled, his hands in fists. His eyes were no longer sad, there was a latent anger in them. It made her sad that she was the cause of his anger, or rather the target.

“Nothing,” she shook her head, “nothing else. Nothing other than random words from your day to day.”

He considered her for a moment, his eyes hovering her face frantically. She tried her best not to listen to his mind, trying to focus on elsewhere, on someone else. But he was like a magnet, and she could help but to be attracted to him and his thoughts. Words of confusion, anger and infatuation floated in his brain and echoed in hers. “Can you turn it off? Your...thing?” he pointed to her head almost in disdain. She knew better than to believe his gestures.

“Not exactly,” she hugged her legs, her chin resting on her knees. “If I could, I would have, a long time ago.”

They remained in silence after that. He looked at the clouds, considering everything she had just told him. She looked everywhere but at him, trying to stray her mind from him. It felt impossible, he became her gravity center, and she couldn’t really escape it. She found that she didn’t want to.

“How did you get the…” he tried to find the right words, “the mind reading thing?”

She laughed at his silly phrasing. “I was born with it,” she looked down at her hands, her cheeks feeling hot. “Professor picked me up and took me to the Institute after I turned 13 because of it.”

“That sounds like a cute way of saying you were kidnapped by the guy,” he commented, his tone serious and his eyes on her.

“I wasn’t,” she tilted her head towards him, as if she was telling him a secret. “I went willingly, actually. The nightmares were getting worse and the headaches,” her eyes locked with his for a brief second as she brushed a piece of her hair out of her face, “well, headaches like yesterday’s are light ones compared to those. And the Professor, he promised to help me control it.”

“That doesn't sound suspicious at all,” she could hear him roll his eyes in disdain.

“He did help me,” she assured him, “but at the time, I didn't realize that it would come with a cost.”

“I’m guessing he wanted something out of you,” he inferred, “that you weren’t willing to give.”

“Something like that,” she responded, her voice vague and distant. Remembering the things Professor had planned for her made her scared and, most of all, angry. Angry he dared to think she would be so desperate to abide by his wishes. She had learned that following his plans brought her nothing more than frustration and loneliness, he robbed her and her friends of a stable childhood so they could become his pawns. “He wasn’t a good person.”

“I get that,” he whispered, his head down, looking at his hands. He opened and closed his left hand repetitively. The anger he had felt once she had told him what she had done came back, but directed towards someone else.

“Listen, Bucky,” she turned her whole body towards him. Her hands itched to grab his, but she knew neither of them were prepared to cross that line, “I’m truly sorry that I… couldn’t control myself. I figured that if I could decipher your thoughts the headaches would stop, but I didn’t realize how much you kept hidden,” she confessed, her fingers fiddling with themselves in a nervous habit. “I didn’t want to hurt your feelings, I want to give you a chance to tell me these things yourself, that’s why I told you.”

He looked at her for a moment before responding. “You told someone who you’d only known for a couple of days your biggest secret,” he recited, almost as if he had been rehearsing the line in his mind over and over, “because you felt bad.”

“Well, when you put it like that it sounds foolish,” she grumbled. “I know what’s like not to be given a choice, and I wanted you to have the choice to, you know, walk away from me,” she finished, her voice just above a whisper. She struggled to keep her tears at bay, a couple of them spilling and running down her cheeks.

“Why would I walk away from you?” he asked her, sincerity in his eyes.

“You wouldn’t be the first person,” her eyes were cast forward, looking way beyond the park. She didn’t bother cleaning the tears that were rolling down her face. “And you wouldn’t be the last, certainly.”

“Doll,” he dragged, his voice low and beautiful, “I wouldn’t.”

She could barely hear his thoughts over her own. She couldn’t think straight anymore, too many emotions flooded her own senses, it was all too much. Her hands rubbed her eyes, trying to rid them of the tears. “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to cry.”

“It’s okay,” he shook his head. “But, seriously, don’t tell your biggest secret to someone you barely know.”

She laughed at his suggestion, her smile watery. “I won’t, don’t worry,” her head tilted to the side, her eyes carefully studying his face. It was the first time she truly took him in. His face was so wonderfully beautiful. His nose and his lips were perfect. But it was his eyes that would always fascinate her. So wonderfully blue and so beautifully deep. It was impossible to not fall in love with him with those eyes.

He got up and brushed his gloves on the sides of his pants. He offered her his right hand, “How’d you say we get that coffee now and you tell me the craziest things you’ve ever seen people think?”

She smiled sincerely at him, her eyes looking up at him in admiration. She took his hand and she let him guide her.

“Doll, you need to start staying at the front desk,” he leaned casually on the side of the bookcase, looking calmly at her as she turned around to face him. “What if someone important comes in and there’s no one there?

She felt amused at Bucky’s teasing and smiled. “Tom’s supposed to be there, he must have just left to do something,” she stated, smugly. “Besides, you’re the only important person that comes here. At least, to me you are,” she tucked a piece of her hair behind her ear.

He bit his lip and looked at her in a way that made her melt. “Aren’t you a charmer.”

She could hear clearly in his thoughts he was amused by her behavior, the word ‘charm’ levitating around her brain. “I learned from the best,” she shrugged brushing past him and walking towards the front desk.

She heard his heavy footsteps behind her. “Are we still up for tonight?” his voice had an edge that wasn’t there before. She sat down on her chair behind the counter as her eyes carefully analyzed his face. His jaw was tense, his eyebrows were furrowed and his fingers were tight around the book he meant to return.

“I’ve been up for it every day for the past month, Bucky,” she narrowed her eyes at him. His jaw clenched even more in a way she didn’t know possible. She tried to ignore his thoughts and the words that bounced around her brain. “What are you trying to say?” she asked softly, taking the book from him gently.

He sighed, resting his elbows on the counter he leaned in. “Sam needs my help,” he said, his voice low and tired. She could tell he wasn’t telling her the full truth, but she didn’t push it.

“Oh,” she muttered, typing away to return the book he brought. “So you’re cancelling?”

“Doll, I wouldn’t if it wasn’t important,” he stated. She could tell he was sad, his eyes told her so, and so did the words in his head. It pained her to see him give up their time together. It was cherished by both, and she suspected it was maybe one of the only moments of the day Bucky didn’t have to hold everything in. Mostly because she could see everything he was hiding.

“Don’t,” she stopped him before he could further apologize. “I understand, an Avenger’s calling you,” she whispered, a devilish smile on her lips, “how could you not answer it?”

“I can think of a lot of ways,” he gritted. He had told her his qualms with Sam Wilson, but it only seemed like friendly teasing and nothing else. Nothing too serious, that's what she judged it to be.

“Bucky,” she warned him, “there are more important people than me, and Sam is definitely one of those. Don’t feel guilty, that’s what I’m trying to say.”

“Y/N,” he never used her first name. He would call her ‘doll’, or ‘love’ or even sometimes ‘sweetheart’, but never by her first name. Hearing it leave his lips sobered her up quickly, “there’s no one more important to me than you.”

Her mouth hung open in complete shock at his declaration. Her brain short-circuited for a moment, before recomposing herself. She opened her mouth to respond him but he quickly beat her to it.

“I’m truly sorry, love,” he shook his head, his eyes cast downwards.

Her eyes hovered him quietly for a second before slipping the book to him. “I extended the due date. Two weeks and nothing more,” she said, sternly. “You know the drill, Bucky.”

“Don’t be late with it, I know,” he recited. His eyes lingered on hers for longer than it normally would. It felt as if he was memorizing her, studying the little details of her face, the little quirks of her personality. She felt heat rising to her cheeks, like every time she was under his intense gaze. He looked downwards for a moment, his mouth slightly opened. “I won’t be gone too long, just a couple of days.”

She got up from her chair and walked to his side. She bit her lip as he watched her go around the front desk. He leaned on his arm, casually standing there as she looked down at her feet in front of him. “You have my number, I’m just a phone call away,” she muttered shyly. She couldn’t handle this flirty interactions with Bucky. Mostly because she would have to juggle her own thoughts with his. But there was something about his demeanor at that moment that put her at ease, she didn’t feel the need to juggle both of their thoughts, only to embrace them. She let herself feel the butterflies and be fully flustered under his charm. It felt nice. “I’m gonna miss you,” she whispered.

“Yeah, me too,” he looked at her eyes, deeply and soulfully. She didn’t know how she hadn’t melted at the spot. “I’ll be back, I promise.”

The corners of her mouth quirked up. “I know,” her lips brushed his cheek. She quickly kissed it and looked back at him. “You should probably go. Don’t wanna keep Sam waitin’.”

He smiled at her one last time before leaving her. His smile, there was something different about that. It felt sincere and genuine, unlike all his other smiles that were usually caused by awkwardness and embarrassment. She had seen something completely different in that smile, something she couldn’t exactly place yet.

She arrived quietly at her apartment, carrying a bag full of groceries and flowers for her tiny garden out in the fire-escape. Her upstairs neighbor had complained about it for months, until he joined and now she shared it with him. She had plans to make the whole building to contribute to the little garden, she was almost convincing her downstairs neighbor and she was a pivotal person.

The apartment was too quiet, unlike normally. There were always whispers of her neighbor’s thoughts echoing through the walls, the busy sounds of the streets, the shouts outside from people going by their day.

“I know you’re here,” she shouted to her apartment, “you weren’t subtle about it.”

“I knew you wouldn’t talk to me, otherwise,” Professor rolled in. He hadn’t changed a single bit since the last time she had seen him. His clothes were the same, his bald head glistened the same way it did, and his chair was just as stoic as his face. She hated him and seeing him in her apartment only reminded her of that.

“That’s cause I don’t want to talk to you, Professor, I thought I had made myself clear,” she growled, resting the bag and the flowers on the kitchen counter. “Why are you here?”

“It has come to my knowledge you’ve been having your episodes,” he said, robotically.

“I’m not having any episodes, I'm fine” she muttered, her back turned to Professor. She cursed Peter mentally for being a fucking snitch. Next time she saw him she was going to give him a piece of her mind.

“You’re not,” he corrected her. As usual, she only heard him in a tone of superiority and condencense, he always knew best. “We know what happens when you let yourself go with other people’s thoughts, child.”

“Don’t call me that,” she gripped the counter, her teeth gritted and her eyes shut. Her hands felt clammy, almost slipping from the counter. She had escaped the Institute, she had sworn she would never go back, for fucking Peter to bring Professor to her again. She knew Peter did it because he was worried. It still didn’t make it sting less. “I said I’m fine, I have everything under control.”

“How long have you been taking the suppressing pills?” he asked her, his voice judgemental and cold.

She turned around to face him for the first time. He was impossible to read, he always made sure of that. As much as she begged him to teach her how to do it, to help her block out thoughts and stop people from getting into her head, he never really did it. She had to discover for herself, and, in that, she never was as effective as him. “It’s none of your business,” she scoffed. “It’s not like I’m of any use to you anymore, Professor. I’m sure you have a brand new shiny pawn you can play with that’s even better than I was. Besides,” she added, crossing her arms on her chest, “you gave me those pills.”

“They’re for emergencies only, Y/N, not continuous use,” he shook his head at her, his piercing through hers, She looked down avoiding his gaze, her jaw tight. Her head started to feel heavy, and she didn’t know if it was his prying or something worse. “Do you remember the last time you used those same pills continuously?”

Her teeth gritted and she closed her eyes to stop him from seeing the tears accumulating in them. She looked at him, her eyes completely angry and full of hurt, “I'm a lot stronger that I was back then,” she gritted.

“Bad things happen when you repress your power,” Professor warned, leaning on his knees. “You learned that the hard way.”

“I haven't taken them in days.” she stated, trying to keep her head focused and her voice free of emotion. Professor considered her for a moment. She could feel him prying in her head, searching for traces of a lie well told. She knew he wouldn’t find any, she told the truth, even if it was half of it.

“I know you’re not telling everything,” he told her, his hands fiddling with the orange vial temptevely. “What are you hiding?”

She scoffed, rolling her eyes at him. When she was younger, she wouldn’t even consider behaving badly around him. Now, she knew better. “I don’t owe you any explanations, Professor. I don’t even understand why are you here,” she pointed accusingly at him. “You've done a pretty good job showing you don’t care all my life, I find it hard to believe you care now.”

His eyes found hers, as always completely unreadable. But she saw the little details, the way his jaw tightened slightly, the way his fingers opened and closed the cap of the bottle nervously. It was hard to tell if the tick was fabricated or not, she could never tell with him. “Very well,” he said. “I’ll be in touch,” he wheeled himself towards the door.

“Please don’t,” she said clearly as he exited her apartment.

As the door closed she let a shuddery breath, laying on her couch in exhaustion. She let a couple of tears fall from her eyes, quickly drying them after. She had cried because of Professor too many times in her life, she would not cry for him one more time.

Her phone vibrated on her back pocket. She sniffed and fished out, checking what was the cause of the notification. ‘Just arrived. Call me’ from Bucky. Her heart picked up, smiling at her phone happily.

It rang a couple of times before he picked up. “You’re late,” she said, before he had the chance to say anything to her, “you said a couple of days.”

“I’m sorry, doll,” he breathed out, “it took longer than anticipated.”

“It’s okay,” she shook her head, a smile on her face. “The book, though, you’re gonna have to pay a fee for being late.”

He laughed at the other end of the line. “First time I ever return it late, can’t you make an exception for me?”

“I didn’t do anything, it was Tom,” she stated quickly. Her lips adorned a permanent smile, so much it barely seemed Professor had just left her apartment. They stayed quiet before anyone said anything.

“I missed you,” he whispered, her heart racing in her chest as he recited the words.

“I missed you too,” she replied back, her voice soft and full of emotion. She tried to contain her tears, an accumulation of feelings from just before and that moment but she couldn’t. “I was so lonely, I’m so glad you’re back.”

“Me too, love,” he sighed on the other end of the line. She could imagine him looking down at his feet, a silly smile on his lips. His eyes were twinkling in her mind the way that melted her, he looked absolutely beautiful as usual. “Do you want to go out? I owe you 2 weeks worth of coffee.”

She looked at the ceiling, trying to contain her heart and failing miserably. “Yeah, yeah, I’d like that,” she breathed out.

“I’ll pick you up in 20.”

She hung up the phone and got up from her couch, a silly smile on her face. Her smile soon faded after she realised what she had done. She was only off the pills for 2 days, it wasn’t enough time for her powers to normalize. Without Bucky present, the abstinence wasn’t as noticeable. Sure, she could hear everything more clearly, the music her neighbor had stucky in his head, or the busy thoughts of a random person passing on the sidewalk. But Bucky always had a thousand things in his head, and that surely would be a problem.

She was telling the truth to the Professor. She wasn’t taking them continuously, only a couple of times a week, when Bucky’s thoughts were always the loudest. But she hadn’t told him that she had stopped so late, later than she should have. She was toeing the line again, just like she had done when she was a kid and the prospect of not listening to everyone all the time seemed too good to be true.

A sigh escaped her lips, her heart racing inside her chest, not for the right reasons. She hoped she could control it, keep her latent power at bay just like she did everyday. It was easy to fool herself like that. She forgot how addicting Bucky could be, how wrapped up in him she would get. It was almost an experiment: how would she deal with Bucky’s mind when her power was at the most raw. She wondered if she should be curious or scared.

Her hands sweated as she unpacked her groceries. A cold rush ran through her spine, and she remembered the symptoms she experienced the last time she was off the pills. Dread settled in her, anticipating what was about to come. She cursed Professor, her stupid mutated gene and those fucking pills. She often wondered what would have happened if she never manifested any powers, how her life would have played out.

Then, her senses were flooded by Bucky. She whipped around to the door, seeing the shadow of his feet lingering outside. Her head felt heavy and there was a pain blooming, something much worse than the ones she’d endured when she first met him. It was a side effect, she should have expected that. She leaned on her table for a moment, trying to get used to the pain. The knock echoed through her apartment. She barely registered it, his thoughts flooding her. It was all so incoherent, flashes of yellowed memories and newer ones ran through her head. She heard her name screamed in his head over and over again, his voice whispering pet names he had given her with images of their time together.

She opened the door and there he was, standing in front of her. He wasn’t wearing his traditional gloves, and he had dodged the leather jacket of a simple longed sleeved t-shirt pulled at his elbows. It was the first time she saw his arm being displayed so freely, so unashamedly. He wore a boyish smile on his face, holding a bouquet of yellow and purple flowers meant for her. “I brought you flowers,” he handed the bouquet to her, his eyes twinkling with a charm she hadn’t seen in him before. “You said you wanted to expand your garden,” he justified with a shrug, his eyes on the bouquet. The smile never left his lips.

She almost forgot about her symptoms, letting his charm encapsulate her and warm her heart. She accepted the flowers, their smell overwhelming her. She stepped aside for him to come in, he ducked his head and got in the apartment quietly. It wasn’t the first time he had been over, but it was still odd to see him in her place. It looked smaller with him in it, less lonely.

“Thank you,” she whispered, closing the door. Her hands glued to the plastic wrapping of the flowers. She wiped her other hand on her pants, gulping nervously. If before she thought his thoughts were loud, in that moment it seemed like they were being blasted in amplifiers at maximum volume. “How’ve you been?” she stuttered, her mouth dry.

“I’m good, good,” he laughed looking down, his hands on his pockets. She could tell he wasn’t lying, for the first time she asked him that question he actually answered it honestly. “How are you, doll?”

She grabbed a pot and some dirt to stick the bouquet in it from the cabinet under the kitchen island. “I’m okay,” she replied quietly. Resting the supplies next to the sunflower she had just bought, a wave of nausea washed over her. She felt the color drain out of her face, feeling lightheaded. Her hands gripped tightly around the backrest of a chair, trying to not collapse to the floor.

She heard him rush to her side, his hands supporting her. The cool touch of his metal arm was contrastant with how hot her skin felt at the moment. “You don’t look okay,” it was like he was yelling in her ear, but she knew his voice was barely above a whisper. “What happened?”

“I’m off my pills,” she gripped his forearms, her eyes shut close. She tried organizing her head, separating her own thoughts with the thoughts of others.

“Let me get them for you,” he guided her to the couch, gently sitting her down.

“No,” she reached for him, her voice dying in her throat. Her hold on his wrist was weak, her eyes closed. The light only worsened her headache, she couldn’t bear to open her eyes. “There’s none left.”

“What d’you mean there’s nothing left?” he asked her, his voice strained. She knew he tried to contain his worry, but it slipped out in his tone. If she wasn’t so sick, she would have appreciated his care. “It seems like something important to have.”

“Professor took ‘em,” her words slurred, “I can’t take more, Bucky.”

“Why?” he hesitated, “what happened?”

“My powers,” her jaw clenched at the sharp pain going through her head, “I just wanted to spend time with you, Bucky, but the pain…” the tears spilled from her eyes, her eyes still closed. The grip on Bucky was tight, she was holding onto him like he was her lifeline, the only thing grounding her to the real world and not her head.

He sat beside her, his hands hovering over her, unsure of what to do. She heard a sliver of guilt going through him, and sadness overwhelmed her because of that. “I’m sorry,” he whispered to her.

“No,” she shook her head, wrapping him up in her arms, “it’s my fault. You’re amazing, Bucky, and I couldn’t stay away,” her tears wet his shirt, her head resting on his shoulder snuggly. She couldn’t help but notice the safe feeling that overwhelmed her in that moment. It was almost like it was where she belonged, safe in his arms. “Your mind… it’s just so beautiful, you’re so beautiful, Bucky. And I was greedy, I wanted you to myself, even if it meant a little pain.”

“A little?” he asked, his voice laced with a sassiness she hadn’t seen before.

She laughed quietly, looking at his face. His blue eyes were sincere, full of emotion and thoughts she could never bring herself to decipher. “A lot,” she sighed, her eyes fixated on his. “I fell back into old habits.”

“I get it,” he assented, his eyes cast on hers, looking for something she didn’t quite know what it was. “Is there anything I can do?”

“Stay,” she whispered, her heart beating fast inside her. “Please, stay.”

And Bucky did. For the first time, someone who had met her, all of her, stayed with her. That only made her love him more. He hugged her tightly, his head resting on the crook of her neck. “I’ll stay,” he reassured her, his thumb caressing her shoulder gently, “I got you”

She mumbled ‘I’m sorry’ like a prayer on his shoulder. It was too much input, her own emotions and his blended and her tears were their escape. “I shouldn’t have unloaded this on you,” she sniffed, breaking the hug. “It’s not fair.”

“Hey,” he gently pushed her hands out of her face. Her face was swollen and her eyes were red, but she could tell he didn’t care, she heard the word ‘beautiful’ bounce around in his head. “I can take it.”

She shook her head, words unable to escape her quivering lips. “Hey, stop,” he said firmly but lovingly, “listen to me,” he grabbed her face delicately, his fingers brushing her cheeks delicately. “I can take it, doll. Trust me. I have my demons too,” he whispered, “and they don’t scare you. You don’t scare me. I’m not going anywhere.”

Even if she wanted to, she couldn’t look away from his eyes. The sincerity in them disarmed her completely, the little restraint she had completely gone. Her breath hitched at the sight of the glimmer in his eyes and the love in his mind. “Thank you,” she mouthed, her voice gone.

“You’re welcome,” he smiled at her, the boyish grin he had sported when he arrived back. “How about I make you some tea?” he got up, walking a few steps to the kitchen. He moved around like her tiny little flat was where he belonged. “I make a mean chamomile tea.”

She laughed quietly, her brain slowly calming down, her fever settling. “I’d like that.”

#Bucky Barnes #TFATWS #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fanfiction #one shot #marvel fanfiction #Sebastian Stan #bucky barnes x librarian!reader #my masterlist

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theoreticslut · 3 years

Text

Summer Lovin’ // Part 2

part 1 / morning after

pairing: fred weasley x reader

requested: yes - by so many of you!!

word count: 3.1k

warnings: 18+ SMUT, degradation, teasing, swearing, hint of thigh riding

A/N: Y’ALL WANTED A PART 2 SO YOU GOT A PART 2 & IT IS HOT AF! Like seriously, I didn’t even know I could write anything like this. So please, please, please leave comments/reblog/etc etc. I hope I have fulfilled all your fantasies with this part 2 because god damn is it s p i c y *chef’s kiss*

Also, check out my ✨End of the Year Party✨ to say goodbye to 2020 once and for all! I’ve tried to include a little bit of everything so we can all have fun! I have it running now until Jan 3rd, so get your asks/requests in!! Xx

Taglist: @justmesadgirl @xuckduck @yikesyikesyikes95 @filipi-yes @aestheticwh0r3 @siredkai @matsuno-nadeshiko @msmarklee1213 @immajustreadwritereblog @msmimimerton @perfectlysane24 @mischievous-queen @bunnyboo7 @grandeoptimist @kaitlynw011 @daddystevee @slytherinxhunter @streetfighterrichie @sarcasticallywitty15 @isthereanymorejello @karushinekomiya @p0gue420 @hogwartslut @sebby-staan @darthwheezely @slytherin-7 @callmelilone @teenagesublimefan @midsummernightdream @weasley8800 @hopefullhearts

^let me know if you’d like to be added/removed (or add yourself here)! Xx

Fred smiles to himself as he walks down the stairs, having sent you up to percy’s room to wait for him. He can’t quite believe what just happened but Merlin is he happy it did. He’s wanted nothing more for a good year now, if not longer.

He makes his way back out to the bonfire and his friends and siblings sitting around it. He can’t help but smirk knowing that they have no idea what just happened in the bathroom.

Fred takes his place next to George who shoots him a smile before looking around in confusion.

“Where’s y/n?” He asks, leaning into Fred.

“She’s getting a migraine. I told her to go lie down and that I’d be up to check on her in a few minutes.” He replies, smiling as his brother nods.

Fred knows you’re going to hate him when he does finally make his way up, but he quite enjoys making you wait. He only hopes you’re being good and obeying his wishes.

~.~

You groan out as you sit there in percy’s bed waiting for Fred to come back up. He said he’d be right back, didn’t he?

The little shit is probably trying to tease you and you hate to admit that it’s working. You are so bloody needy for him that you’re literally squirming. He just had to fucking tease you there in the bathroom and then leave you.

You huff out, whining as you try to find any sort of friction. You want to be a good girl and not touch yourself, but as each minute drags by you’re finding it to be more difficult.

“Fuck you, Freddie.” You whine, squeezing your thighs together and throwing you’re head back as you want nothing more than to feel him inside you again.

“That’s not very nice, princess.” He chuckles, smirking at you as he closes the door, making sure to lock it and cast a silencing charm just in case.

“What took you so long?” You pout, watching his every move and shivering in anticipation as he makes his way over to you.

“Well it’d look a little suspicious to disappear right away wouldn’t it, sweetheart. We don’t want to make them wonder, do we?” He chuckles, stopping when he’s standing right in front of you.

You shake your head, whimpering. Godric you wanted him so bad. You needed him.

“Is the little princess needy? She get herself all wet sitting up here thinking of me?” He asks, smirking as you whine, watching as you shake your head.

You wanted to feel him more than anything but you weren’t going to give him the satisfaction of knowing that.

“No? Well that surprises me.” He chuckles, pushing your knees apart so you couldn’t get any more friction unless he gave it to you.

“Freddie!” You gasp, it turning into a moan as he slides his knee against you.

“You like that, baby? You want me to touch you? Want me to make you feel good?”

“Freddie...”

“What, princess? What do you want me to do?” He smirks.

God he loves having you a whiny mess. It was certainly hot to see you take control, and is definitely something he’d like to do again, but all he’s dreamed about since he realized he liked you is to have you whining for him, begging him to do something.

“Kiss me, please. Touch me.” You beg, your head rolling backwards as he presses his knee against you.

“Anything you want, love.” He smiles, leaning down to catch your lips with his.

He smiles into the kiss, loving the feel of your lips against his. They’re so soft and plump, he knows he could get lost kissing them if he wanted to.

Slowly he pushes you back on the bed, gently climbing on top of you as he continues kissing your wondrous lips. You moan into the kiss, loving the feeling. You never thought you’d get to kiss your best friend, but it’s everything you’ve dreamed of and more.

“Fred,” you gasp breathily as he moves his hands up under your hoodie, resting on your waist.

“Yes, princess?”

“I love you.”

He smiles, catching your lips with his again as he feels himself relax. He’s more than ready to please you, but hearing you say those three words makes him melt. He’s wrapped around your finger and he doesn’t care one little bit.

“I love you too.”

You sigh, calming down a bit as he massages your hips, trailing warm, soft kisses down to your neck.

“Tell me what you’ve thought about me, Freddie. Please?” You beg, whining as he removes his lips from your skin, drawing up a smirk on his lips.

“You want to hear how hard you make me?” He teases, an eyebrow quirking at you.

You nod, begging him with your eyes as you watch him for his reaction. He smiles, leaning down to kiss you as he trails his hands up your sides.

“You’re just so beautiful, y/n. It’s hard not to find you attractive. You know how to flatter yourself without even trying.”

“Yeah? How so, Fred?”

“Those swimsuits you wear....godric they’re magnificent. The one you wore today especially. Do you like to parade around with your ass hanging out, darling? Do you try to tease me?”

You can’t help but whimper as Fred grabs ahold of your legs, separating them once more as he fits himself between you, not letting you get any pressure aside from his hips pressing into you.

“N-no.” You whine, wanting Fred to touch you or grind against you. Just something.

“No? Oh, I know you don’t try to, darling, but you look absolutely divine in them.”

“Not to mention your shorts you like to wear, princess. You just love to highlight your ass don’t you?” He chuckles, grabbing a handful of your ass cheeks as he lays on top of you.

You squirm, feeling yourself getting wetter at his words. You were already so turned on and now he’s just teasing you. It’s so unfair, you can’t help but whine.

“I love your ass so much, princess. I want to be able to hold it whenever I want. And your chest. Merlin, sweetheart, I go crazy whenever you wear your pajamas. You wanna know why?”

“Why, Freddie?” You whimper.

“Because your shirts are so bloody thin. I can’t think about anything else except what you look like underneath them. I nearly came in my pants the first time your nipples pressed through. Godric, I wanted to latch onto them right then and there, princess.”

You let out a particularly loud groan as he recounts this, your hips attempting to buck up. You want nothing more than for him to attach his lips to you. You’ve only been thinking about how bloody attractive he is and how much you’d love for him to take you for at least two years now.

“You like that idea?” He laughs, dragging his hands up your sides again, this time reaching for your chest. He’s yet to have a chance to hold them.

“Bloody hell, princess.” Fred groans, grabbing at your bare breasts under your hoodie. “Didn’t feel like wearing a bra I see.”

You whine, trying to buck your hips up into him once again only to have him tut at you.

“My pretty girl is so needy, aren’t you, y/n?” Fred teases, pushing his hips down into yours to keep you still as he massages your chest.

“Freddie, please. Please.” You beg, nearly wanting to cry at how turned on you were.

You just want his dick inside you again, his hands feeling your body as he makes you cum.

“So needy, princess.” Fred chuckles, kissing your neck a few times before pulling himself away to remove your hoodie.

He smiles as he admires your chest, finally getting to see it for the first time. He can’t help but let out a groan as he commits this view to memory. Almost in a trance, he leans down and sucks at the place where your neck and shoulder meet before trailing his lips down across your collarbones and then to the tops of your breasts before finally attaching to your nipples.

“Freddie,” you gasp, letting out a soft moan as he pays ample attention to your breasts.

Moaning in response, he circles his tongue around your nipple once more before sucking it into his mouth as he pulls away so when he releases, it makes a small ‘popping’ sound.

“Oh, Godric.” You moan as he works on your other breast, making sure both are equally attended to.

“So pretty, y/n. So so pretty.” Fred mumbles against your skin as his lips trail down your stomach, the knot that’s been building only tightening.

“Freddie,” you breathe out, “please do something.”

“Patience, princess.” He smiles, kissing just below your belly button.

He’s loving all the sounds falling from your lips; your breathless pants, your needy moans, your whines and whimpers and content sighs. He loves all of it, only loving it more when he remembers that he’s the one drawing them out of you.

You whine, feeling him lift himself up from you so he can unbutton and remove your shorts. This isn’t fair. You helped him out with very little teasing, why is he drawing this out for you?

Sure it feels heavenly, but you’re just so damn needy. You need him to touch you. You need to feel him inside you, whether it’s his dick, his fingers, or even his tongue. You just need him inside you.

Maybe next time you will have to get him a taste of his own medicine. Oh how you would love to hear him whine and moan for you, begging for you to please him.

You go to close your knees as a wave pleasure runs through you at the thought, but Fred is quick to hold them down.

“Be a good girl, y/n. We’re so close to what you want. You don’t want me to have to stop do you?”

“No.” You whimper, looking up at him with big, pleading eyes and a pout.

“Merlin, you’re stunning.” He smiles, pressing a soft kiss to your lips before focusing his attention back on your bottoms.

Within seconds he’s got the button and zipper undone and he’s pulling them, along with your underwear, down your legs. You whine as the action lets cool air hit your folds.

“Freddie!”

“Sensitive, baby? It’s no wonder. You’re so fucking wet for me.” He smirks, trailing a finger through your folds.

You whine, your hips bucking up at the contact. You want him. Scratch that, you need him and he’s still being a bloody tease.

“Fred, please. Need you so bad.”

He smiles, leaning down to lick at your clit, gently holding your legs open for him as he eats you out.

“Freddie, want your cock. Please.” You cry, not able to contain it anymore.

“Who knew my best friend was so desperate. And for my cock no less. I love it, baby. Tell me what you want.”

You huff out, your back arching against the bed. Fred smirks, leaning back so he’s sitting on his knees. He loves seeing you so desperate and needy, and all because of him. No lie it gives him such an ego boost knowing that he and he alone can get you like this.

You heave out a breath as you become impatient. Before Fred can realize what’s happening, you’re sat up and kissing him as you paw at his body, trying to remove his shirt and pants as quickly as possible.

“Godric, baby.” He chuckles, taking the hint and removing his shirt.

He stops just as he gets it over his head when he hears you let out a particularly loud moan. Looking down at you he sees you leaning back, eyes shut tight as your head is thrown back.

Trying to figure out what happened, he grabs ahold of your waist, pulling you up into his bare chest.

“You alright, princess? What happened?”

He stares, heart racing in nervousness as you fail to answer. Instead a trail of soft, deep moans leaving your throat. He’s thoroughly confused until he feels a cold spot on his leg.

Looking down he can’t help the smirk that grows on his face and the shiver that runs straight to his cock. When he had gone to remove his shirt, you and him must have moved in just the right way for your clit to rub against his clothed thigh. It must have felt amazing, too, looking at the moan you had let out and how you’re still trying to rub against his thigh.

“Oh for merlin’s sake.” He groans, pushing you off his thigh as he quickly unbuttons his trousers and removes them, leaving the both of you completely naked for each other.

“You ready, princess?”

You nod, whining as his cock drags through your folds. You couldn’t form words even if you wanted to at this point.

“Princess, I gotta hear your words.”

“Yes, Freddie. For fucks sake, please.” You cry.

He smiles, sliding himself inside you. He loves the sound you let out; something between a high-pitched moan and a sigh.

He can’t help but grunt out as you almost immediately clench around him. This is so so much better than what he’s been imagining for a year now.

You can’t control the sounds falling from your lips anymore. You’re in such bliss. Sure it felt amazing riding Fred, but having him fuck you? You’re pretty sure this is the closest thing to heaven you’ve experienced yet.

You can feel every movement of his. You can feel every inch of him as he moves and you can feel him hitting the very insides of you. You can feel his grip on your hip as he hovers over you. It’s all so intoxicating and you’re nearing you climax faster than you ever have.

“Freddie, I-I’m so close.”

He nods, being able to feel the clenching of your walls as he thrusts.

“It’s alright, princess. You can cum. Cum all over me as I fuck you. Show your best friend who you belong to.”

“Oh fuck, Freddie.” You whine, walls clenching at his words. As much as you would love to be more than friends with him, you have to admit how hot it is to hear him utter the words to you in a sexual context.

“That’s it, darling. Just like that. I know you’re close, sweetheart.”

You whimper as you feel yourself hitting you’re peak but not quite falling yet.

“Fr-eddie.” You cry, wanting to cum so bad.

“It’s alright, baby. I know. Let’s try this, yeah?” He asks, lifting one of your legs and wrapping it around his waist.

“Oh fuck.”

“That feel good? You think you can cum for me? I know how much you want to for your best friend, darling. You wanna cover me in your cum so bad.”

You whine, your thighs clenching as he talks. Who knew you liked things to be so inappropriate?

“Cum for me, princess. Show me how good I make you feel.” Fred coaxes, snapping his hips faster into you as he brings a hand down to rub your clit.

Before you can register it, you’ve reached your high and are coming all around his cock. You just barely hear him praising you as everything is muffled in the height of your climax.

“Ah fuck, fuck fuck fuck.” He groans as you feel him release inside you, slowly pulling himself out of you and lay down beside you when he’s done.

For a few minutes the both of you just lay there, trying to catch your breath and make sense of what just happened. Obviously this changes things, but to what? Were you two...dating now? Or were you just going to be someone you could each go to for a fuck when needed?

“Y/n, I swear to Merlin. Stop thinking so much.” Fred chuckles, wrapping his arms around you as his chest presses against your back.

“I can’t help it, Fred. You know this.” You sigh, burying your face into the pillows to avoid looking at him.

Why you were embarrassed now, after he just fucked your soul out of your body you have no idea.

“Hey. It’s nothing to hide over. Come on, look at me please?”

Slowly you unbury your head, turning around in his arms so your breasts are nearly pressed into his chest.

“I love you.”

“Really? Like it’s not just the post orgasmic bliss talking?” You question, not quite believing that someone like your best friend, Fred Weasley, would like you, let alone love you.

“Maybe a little bit.” He chuckles.

You roll your eyes, trying to hide the frown that takes ahold of your lips.

“Hey, I’m kidding, y/n. I do really really love you. And I’m not just saying that because we had sex.”

“You promise?”

“I promise. Cross my heart.” He smiles as he watches his words bring a smile to your lips and a blush to your cheeks.

He is so in love with you. To him, you are anything and everything he could ever want from life. There’s nothing in this world he wouldn’t do for you.

“So what does this mean for us, Freddie?”

You watch him as he watches you fidget in his arms nervously. He smiles, placing a soft kiss to your forehead, your eyes closing as you savour the feeling of it.

What would you say to being my girlfriend if I were to ask?”

You think about it for a few seconds as he continues watching you. You smirk, his expression changing to one of confusion.

“I don’t know. You’d have to ask and find out.” You tease, giggling as he shakes his head, smiling at you.

“Oh you little-“

You quirk an eyebrow at him as he smiles wider.

“I knew there was a reason why I fell in love with you. You’re just as cheeky as George and I. More so some days”

“Yeah? Well where does that leave us?”

You’re waiting for him to ask you, but he keeps going around the topic.

“Godric, I love you. Will you be my girlfriend, y/n?”

“I’d love to.”

He smiles, pulling you into a kiss as he wraps his arms tighter around you.

“Well let’s go get ourselves cleaned up, princess.” He mumbles after a few minutes. “Hopefully everyone is still outside. Then we can go cuddle in my bed, yeah?”

You nod, smiling at the idea. You weren’t honestly sure if your had the strength to move yet, but as long as you were with Fred you didn’t think it would make a difference. After years of pining for him, you were finally his and he was yours. There’s nothing that could spoil this moment for you.

———————

Morning After

#harry potter #harry potter imagine #fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley smut #fred weasley imagine #hp character x reader #hp smut #hp fanfic #hp imagine

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megthemewlingquim · 4 years

Note

Omg meg for Kinktober could you write ❛ your face would look better between my legs. ❜ where the reader is teasing Bucky/Loki (you pick) all night when they are at a party or something? And the reader says that and that's the last straw

Come Again?

Summary: You cross the line with your teasing, and Loki punishes you.

Pairing: Loki x Reader

Warnings: teasing, dom! Loki, oral (fem receiving), orgasm denial / delay, heavy overstimulating, multiple orgasms, aftercare

A/N: Hi, babes! This is my DAY TWO entry for Kinktober.

You really shouldn’t feel this good about what you’re doing. It’s not really a good thing, not to your husband, who just so happens to be the God of Mischief. But it is, at the same time.

What you’re doing is wearing something incredibly skimpish. Revealing. A dress that doesn’t even reach to your knees and has no sleeves. His favorite color, emerald green. Very, very fitted for you. He would know, he made it for you. But he had no idea you would use it to your advantage.

And Loki can only handle himself for so long before he snaps. You know this.

This is not the first time you’re deliberately trying to get on Loki’s nerves, but this is the first time it’s this… extreme. You’re really pushing your luck.

It’s a party hosted by Tony, one of many that you’ve attended with Loki. The air was different there after you married Loki. The two of you were complete, one flesh, absolutely inseparable, and everyone around you knew it, even if they hadn’t attended the wedding.

Thor, Natasha, Bruce, Bucky, Clint, Steve, Tony, Wanda, Vision, and Sam are all there, along with any S.H.I.E.L.D. agents who wanted to come - not many did.

You’re currently sipping on a Dr. Pepper that Tony so kindly poured in a wine glass. You’re not one for alcohol, except maybe the occasional hard seltzer. Today, you’ve decided, is not a night for alcohol.

Loki is beside you on your left, with an arm draped behind your shoulders and a finger drawing small, slow circles on your right arm. He looks... hm, happy is not the word for it, but he does not look annoyed or irritated. He looks blank.

“Baby?” you ask, an aside. You keep your eyes on Steve, who is currently listing everything that probably happened in those new timelines he created. “Everything okay?”

“Oh, yes,” Loki replies nonchalantly, “I’m fine. It’s just that my wife has been absolutely naughty with her attire, and I have a very annoying hard-on, but I don’t want to indulge her because quite frankly, she doesn’t deserve it.”

You freeze, and for a second, you cannot bring yourself to say anything. Your eyes widen, just a little.

Then, you smile. "I have no idea what you're talking about."

His eyes widen, then, and he leans forward, his lips grazing your ear. “Do not test me,” he whispers, his words laced with dominance and daring. “You know what’ll await you when we get back home if you do.”

You nod, your whole being suddenly stiff with desire and that submissive fear that isn't really fear.

"Now, what do you say?" he asks softly, not pulling away, a little grin on his face now. His tone is almost condescending.

"Sorry," you whisper, your chest heaving. Your mind, however, thinks the exact opposite.

“Apology accepted.” It’s a mystery to you if he believes you or not. He sure makes it seem like he does believe you, but you’re talking to the god of mischief here. You really can't be sure if he's being sincere.

And even if he is, you're not, and you like it.

Time passes by quite slowly, but that doesn't mean it's not enjoyable. Tony offers another toast to you and Loki, the newlyweds, though the wedding was three months ago. Bucky and Steve share a dance. So do you and Loki.

He holds you close, both hands around your waist. You sway from side to side, and he twirls you occasionally. Your eyes are aglow with love, sheer love for him — so much so that you almost forget how you're dressed, and what you're doing to Loki.

Almost.

Now's the time. The time to get what you want.

You lean in at the very end, your lips close to his ear. "Your face is all blushy. It's cute. But it would look better in between my legs."

His grip on your waist gets tighter.

There’s a split second of tension. Then,

"We're leaving," he says simply, and his tone is so quiet, so deep, so dark, that this time you're petrified. Both petrified and incredibly turned on.

Oh, so it's going to be one of those nights.

It’s quite easy to leave, you find out. You suspect that Loki has placed his invisibility on the both of you, so that no one notices you leave. When you both pass Thor from behind, however, he looks around. For a second, his eyes land right on you. But then he turns back around with a shrug, an unseen smile on his face.

“He knows,” Loki mutters. “I don’t give a damn if any of them know... not in any other circumstance. But this...” He takes a hold of your arm. His grip is tight. “This is between you and me this time.”

And with that, you make your way towards the exit.

Walking home is tension filled as well. Loki keeps silent, his arm wrapped around you. It seems protective to the common bystander, but you know that it is also possessive. You stay close to him, gripping onto his coat as if you’re a child.

When you both get home, he locks the front door. A common practice when it’s time to go to sleep, as it is with most families. But, you notice it’s only 7:04 p.m. when you look at the clock on the wall.

He says nothing while you set your coat on one of the dining chairs and your purse on the table. He eyes you with eyes so minimally narrowed that it wouldn’t even seem like anything’s different to them, but you notice. Even now, his gaze is piercing, primal.

You take one step towards the general vicinity of the bedroom, and he pounces on you like an animal. His grip is not too tight, nor is his face too angry - you know what kind of a mood he’s in.

“Did you really think you could get away with that?” he asks, almost smugly. “Naughty little thing.”

He all but throws you on the bed, not exactly man-handling you, but still being a little assertive.

“It was very rude of you to tease me like that,” he says, his tone once again condescending. He clicks his tongue. “Oh dear... what are we to do with you now?”

His eyes glance over your form; you’re still in your tight fitted dress, but your hair is now down. The look in your eyes is different, too: you look small, weaker.

Submissive.

“Well,” he says slowly, inching closer to the bed, his voice dark. “Let’s see. You wanted to tease me so badly, you wanted me to feel that... frustration... so badly. How about we give you a taste of your own medicine, hmm?”

His gaze hardens. “Take your dress off.”

And what can you do but obey?

You slide your dress up and over your torso, and let it fall beside you on the bed in a heap.

“Bra and panties, too.”

You do so, the air seemingly closing in tight around your form. Goosebumps break out, and you shiver. Your eyes never leave his.

All he does is look at you. He doesn’t move. “What are you thinking, pet?”

“I want - “ You swallow. “I want you.”

He chuckles. “It seems like you want a lot of things today. Never fear, pet. But...” his voice darkens again, “remember, this is a punishment. And you need to learn your lesson.

“Lie down on the bed. Do not spread your legs.”

You let yourself fall back, leaving yourself bare to him. A faint green glow appears in your peripheral vision. You hear a quiet buzzing noise, and your breath hitches.

“Oh, yes, pet,” Loki whispers seductively. “Today we’re edging you until you can’t take it anymore. You’re going to feel the same frustration that I have felt, and you will not be able to come until I allow it. Understood?”

You gulp, nodding your head frantically. “Yes, yes, please —"

“Please what?”

Your lip quivers, and you take a breath. “Yes, Master.”

“Good girl. Keep your eyes on the celling.”

Inwardly, you smile. Outwardly, you quiver and shudder in anticipation.

Suddenly, you feel your arms move upward. They are then locked above you, and you look up, seeing spinning neon - green rings of light. They look like handcuffs, you notice, and you lose your breath.

The vibrator trails up your legs, and with every movement you become more and more aroused and needy. It’s so close to where you need it, and yet so far. Loki is a tease, especially in times like these.

He brings it up, right next to your clit, and you buck your hips up with a desperate whine, and he chuckles darkly. “Teasing comes first. Then the pleasure. Then the agony... and, then, eventually, the releases.”

Releases. That’s plural.

He holds the toy there, watching you as you slowly begin to feel the pleasure it brings you. You don't make too much noise. Knowing Loki, moaning could be off limits.

His voice is a deep murmur:

“Do not ask me to come. You will be silent, aside from your desperate moans and whines and gasps. You will not find your release until I allow you to. And once you come, I will keep you here, unable to escape. You’re going to come, then, until you can’t take it anymore. I will force orgasm after orgasm from you until you’re a mewling, pathetic little mess. This is your favorite type of punishment, yes?”

You’re gasping now, both at his words and the feeling of warmth that has now grown into a fire in your gut. Your legs shake and your back arches, but you cannot get him to help you out in any way.

“Ah, ah, ah,” he whispers. “Remember, you will not control your pleasure today. I will.” With that, he moves the vibrator a little more upward, right on top of your clit, and you emit a sound that sounds almost like a squeak.

“Do not come.”

He holds it there, almost certainly watching how you buck your hips up and strain against your magicked restraints. You’re practically drenched in sweat, eyes fixed on the ceiling but closing rapidly. Trying to get away, trying to hold your orgasm back, because you both know you’re achingly close —

You practically scream through gritted teeth when he removes the vibrator. Your cry turns into a light, frustrated sob.

He does it again. And again. And again.

Then,

There’s a pause in which nothing else happens. You can tell that Loki’s thinking something, in the middle of hearing your frustrated sobs.

“Have you learned your lesson now, wife?”

Wife. This is when he’s letting up, revealing more of his tender side. The dom is leaving, and the husband is coming onto the stage.

You sob again. “Yes — yes, yes, I have! Please, Master, just let me come! Please, please, pl —”

The vibrator is shoved onto your clit at full blast. Loki’s voice becomes stern again, and he demands:

“Come. Now.”

And your orgasm hits you like a train. Now, you scream through your teeth, almost blacking out at the intensity of it. It’s over as quick as it arrives, however, and it soon replaced by sheer beautiful agony once again as Loki keeps the vibrator on your now overly sensitive clit.

You try to move away. You have the audacity to try to move away.

“What did I tell you? That was only the first half. I’m not done with you yet. You’re going to come until I let you go.”

Your next three orgasms are almost painful, and he rips them from you with no mercy. He stands there, not moving. His eyes are on yours, and they’re almost blank. It’s a miracle his hand hasn’t gotten tired yet.

“Do it. Come again.”

“Again.”

“One more.”

Finally you muster up the courage to cry out, the tears never fading from your eyes. It feels good, too good. You love it and despise it. “Loki...”

“I know, pet, I know.”

You look up at him, then, surprised at the tenderness in his voice once again. The Loki you’re looking at now is no longer the dom, no longer Master. His eyes are softer, kinder. He’s your husband now, and you practically sigh in relief.

“This is the last one. Can you come for me one last time?”

You manage a nod and a breathless smile.

“Good girl. Come, come for me, my angel.”

Somehow, this last orgasm is soft. Gentle. It’s not nearly as painful for you - you can compare it to a slow wave.

You can feel the restraints disappearing as soon as it ends and you instinctively jump away from his touch and curl up into a ball. Your body is still shaking, every nerve jumping and hot. All you can try to do is focus on the feeling of the air on your skin, which is now sweaty and warm, and the somewhat cooler sheets below you.

Loki must’ve slipped into bed beside you, because you feel a weight come against your back.

He waits to touch you. He waits until you say that he can. When you do, he sweeps you into his arms, running his hands up and down your own arms and kissing his way around your neck and shoulders. All the while, he never stops whispering his praise:

“Such a good girl for me.

“You did so well, sweet.

“You can rest in my arms now. I love you, my angel.”

Sleep takes you easily.

#loki smut #loki of asgard #loki (marvel)#loki fanfic #loki #loki laufeyson #loki x reader #loki odinson #marvel headcanons #marvel asks #marvel #kinktober

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svnflowervol666 · 4 years

Text

An interview during self-isolation with Zane Lowe (Harry Styles x fem!Reader)

Word Count: 2.2k

Author’s Note: I’ve gotten a ton of asks to the tune of this scenario - about what a quarantine video with Harry and his family would look like. I put as many of them together as I could for you all! Hope you enjoy and it’s not too confusing, as this isn’t my typical writing style, but I tried my best to make it worth your while! Take care and TPWK.

“Harry, can ye’ hear me alright?” Harry heard Zane Lowe’s voice fill his right ear as he readjusted his headphones.

“Yeah, I can hear ya,” he responded, running his fingers through his hair once everything was situated and his laptop was balanced perfectly on his knee.

“I’ve just been video calling and chatting it up with everyone on how they’re navigating the pandemic, so I’m very thankful you’ve agreed to join in.”

“‘S no problem. Thank you f’ having me.”

“Oh!” Zane interjected his own strain of thought, “I see you’ve brought a special guest for us today,” he said when Harry’s screen finally focused and he was able to see everything on Harry’s end.

Harry chuckled, the dimples on either corner of his mouth growing wider at the mention of the sleeping body on his chest that’s got a fuzzy blanket tucked into their sides and draped over Harry’s upper half.

“I have,” Harry agreed, “Though he’s not gonna be worth much. Being a two-year-old is exhausting apparently.”

He gave the toddler a few gentle pats on the back and continued to look at Zane through the webcam.

“This is your son, right?” Zane asked.

“Who? Him?” Harry asked, nodding his head in the direction of his child, “Nah. Found him on the street.”

Both men laughed, but Harry tried to lower his volume as to not wake up his son.

“Well, he looks an awful bit like you t’ be a stray, don’t ye’ think?”

“I suppose the curls are quite convincing, aren’t they?” Harry sighed, playfully rolling his eyes.

“What’s brought your bubs along with you for this interview?”

“Erm,” Harry thought, wondering if he should be talking this much about his personal life but ultimately deciding it wasn’t too invasive, “Y/N’s been pretty tired lately, so I’m just trying to keep him out of her hair so she can rest. He’s going through a phase where he’s very clingy right now so he’d probably be crying f’ me at some point if I left him in his room.”

“Oh, that’s right!” it suddenly dawned on Zane, “You two are expecting again, aren’t you?

“We are,” Harry smiled softly yet proudly into the screen, “‘s kinda scary for us right now, but we’re hoping everything is cleared up before it’s time.”

“Yeah, yeah. I was just about to say right now’s probably not the greatest time to be havin’ a baby.”

“Well, the baby’s not due for a few more months so I think everything’ll be alright, but it’s still just kinda nerve-wracking ye’ know?”

“Absolutely,” Zane added, “This has all got t’ be tough on your guys; having to self-isolate with a toddler plus having one on the way.”

“Ehh, it’s not so bad,” Harry countered, rubbing his eyes with his knuckles as he spoke. “We’ve been spending a lot of time t’gether, which is pretty great. I just got done with all of the album promo, so I’d already been gone for a while. Plus, I was about to leave for tour for like a month so we were kinda sad about having to say goodbye before, but now I don’t have to. We talk to our families a lot and keep in touch with everyone pretty regularly so we don’t feel like we’re going too crazy.”

“Good! That’s good.”

Harry nodded in agreement.

“I was going to ask you about tour actually. You’ve pushed the European leg of your Love on Tour to next year, is that correct?”

“Correct.”

“That must be hard for you, I’m sure. I bet you were so ready to get back on the road and to have it all pulled out from under ye’ was probably not the greatest feeling.”

“I mean, it’s obviously disappointing, but like, in the grand scheme of things, it’s not the most important thing in the world. But I think everyone kinda understands that there’s not anything you can do about it and ye’ have to do what you can to keep everyone safe, ya know?”

“For sure,” Zane nodded, readjusting the hat on his head.

“Plus, it gives you time to practice doesn’t it?”

Harry’s belly shook as he laughed softly.

“Definitely gives us plenty of time to be prepar-”

Harry stopped in his tracks and looked down at his son who was still napping away, lifting his hand up from where it had been rested on his tiny bum.

“Everything alright?” Zane asked Harry after he was still quiet for a few seconds and his eyes were as wide as saucers.

“Uhh, yeah,” Harry stuttered as a noticeable heat climbed to his cheeks, “Think m’ son’s just farted on me in his sleep.”

This made Zane laugh even harder than he had before, clutching his chest while Harry remained embarrassed that his son had just passed gas on him during his first interview.

The commotion seemed to stir Harry’s son from his sleep. His pudgy legs began to stretch against Harry’s chest and his balled-up fists reached up to rub at his closed eyes. Harry seemed to sense some trepidation, like his son was going to start fussing at any given moment, so he quickly began bouncing his small body against his knee to soothe him and shushed him quietly in his ear. Zane didn’t draw much attention to it, but he couldn’t help but swoon over how easily Harry’s son settled back down.

Harry whispered, “’s alright, bubby. You’re alright,” before kissing the top of his curls gently, no doubt making the viewers lose their minds at home with how gentle he was being towards his boy.

“So your boy farts himself awake, huh?” Zane joked.

“Wouldn’t be the first time. He’s an absolute mess,” Harry added.

“Does he take after you or Y/N?”

Clearly, neither of them were interested in talking about music or tour anymore. Harry’s son had stolen the show, and he wasn’t even conscious.

“A little bit of both I’d say. He’s extremely kind and caring like Y/N, but loves to mess around like me. Can’t really say he got any of Y/N’s looks, though.”

“Absolutely not,” Zane chuckled into his mic, “That one’s all you.”

Harry laughed again, rubbing the tip of his nose with the palm of his hand out of habit.

“Is he excited to be a big brother?”

“Ehh, I think he kinda gets the idea, but not really,” Harry tilted his hand back and forth to symbolize the fact that his toddler could just barely come to grips with there being another baby in his mum’s belly.

“He knows there’s ‘something in mummy’s tummy,’“ Harry noted using air quotes, “And he like, gives Y/N’s stomach kisses all of the time because we tell him to and he sees me do it, but I don’t really think he’s come to grips with it.”

“Well, that makes sense,” Zane responded, “He’s only two.”

“Right, right,” Harry agreed, “But he’s, like, super cuddly and loves his stuffed animals and stuff, so I don’t think he’s gonna have a hard time at all really.”

Just when Zane was going to try to get back on topic with his prepared list of questions he had written up for Harry that didn’t involve his son, there was a commotion on Harry’s end that occurred somewhere beyond the view of the camera.

It was the sound of a door shutting a feet padding against hardwood steps.

“Harry!” a voice called out.

“Have you seen my laptop charger? I’m trying to FaceTime Gem- Oh,” the voice stopped.

“Sorry, baby,” Harry spoke above the laptop screen to whoever had just walked into the room, “Couldn’t find mine and I had t’ talk t’ Zane.”

“Which Zane?”

“Is that Y/N I hear?” Zane asked Harry.

Harry laughed at his wife’s words, quickly specifying that it was Zane Lowe and not his former bandmate.

“Yes, it is Y/N. She’s awoken from her beauty sleep it appears.”

The camera wasn’t able to pick up the way Y/N rolled her eyes at Harry.

“Gimme one of those,” Y/N demanded, holding her hand out for the other earbud that Harry wasn’t wearing so she could join in on his conversation with Zane.

Harry swung the free earbud around his chest with his free hand as to not disturb their son, smiling smugly at his wife while she settled onto the sofa next to him and cuddled into his side.

“Hello, gorgeous,” Zane greeted her.

“Hello, handsome,” Y/N responded, “How come you never call to talk to me anymore? Why do you only care about this nobhead?”

She playfully shoved Harry’s shoulder, but not hard enough to actually knock him sideways.

“He does have the number one album in the country right now. Kinda makes sense to check in on him now, dunnit?”

“And I’m his baby mama, so where’s my praise for carrying his little spawns?”

“You truly are a saint for tha’ one. I won’t lie.”

Harry feigned offense but failed to hide the smile that tugged on the corners of his lips.

“I’m sitting right here!” he scoffed.

“We know, love,” Y/N cooed him as she looked over at him and brushed his curls that had fallen onto his forehead back into his mess of hair.

“How are you doing, though, Y/N? We talked a bit about you while you were away. Harry said you’re strugglin’ a bit?”

“Umm, I mean, it’s just normal pregnancy stuff,” she dismissed his qualms as she absentmindedly stroked her protruding belly that was just barely in the frame, “I’m at the point where everything hurts all of the time and everything Harry does annoys the piss out of me, but other than that I’m pretty much normal.”

“Goodness. He didn’t tell me that part,” Zane chuckled, “Please elaborate.”

“Okay, well first of all-,” Y/N started.

“Why are you acting like you were just waiting f’ someone to ask you that question?” Harry forced through laughter.

“Because I’ve got a lot to say!” she exclaimed.

“You don’t pick up your dirty clothes, you leave your tea mugs all around the house, and you and your son eat all of my bread!”

“I do not eat all of the bread!” Harry started to playfully argue with his wife.

“I caught you sneaking into the pantry at midnight eating bread right out of the bag, Harold.”

“Well, what were you doin’ awake in the kitchen at midnight anyway, hmm?”

“I’m pregnant. I’m allowed to be hungry every twenty minutes. You’ve got no excuse.”

Harry sighed in defeat, meanwhile, Zane sat back and enjoyed listening to the two of them bickering like children.

“Sounds like the quarantine might getting t’ the both of you, huh?”

“Oh, no,” Y/N dismissed Zane, “We’re always like this.”

Just then, Harry felt the weight distribution on his chest shift, and saw a pair of emerald green eyes identical to his open and look back and forth between him and Y/N. His pudgy cheeks were flushed a warm, crimson color and the t-shirt he had taken a nap in was tugged over to the side from how well he had slept.

“Well, hello there, bubby. Nice of you t’ join us,” Harry spoke calmly to his son that was in the middle of waking up, gently brushing his fingers along the side of his face.

“Dear god. He looks just like you, Harry,” Zane said in disbelief.

This made Harry blush and hide his face in his son’s plush blanket, and Y/N looked lovingly down at her two boys.

“I know he does,” Harry confirmed, “Poor thing.”

Y/N rolled her eyes at Harry’s comment. As if that was meant to be an insult.

“Hung-y,” the three of them heard the toddler mumble.

“What’s that, lovie?” Y/N perked up.

“I hung-y” he repeated, his arms outstretched for his mother to which she happily accepted.

The boy crawled right over Harry towards Y/N, his foot sinking deep into Harry’s gut and making him grunt in reaction.

“You’re hungry?” Y/N asked, “You want some lunch, bubs?”

He nodded into Y/N’s shoulder where he had tucked himself away, clearly still in the mood to be loved on and cuddled.

“Well, let’s go make you something to eat then. What do you want? A banana?”

“Bread!” cheered the two-year-old, which earned a laugh from everyone in the room and an eye-roll from Y/N.

“Of course, you want bread. Wouldn’t expect anything less from your father’s child.”

“Why are you bullying me?” Harry fired back.

“Because you’re eating all of my damn bread!” Y/N yelled before scooping their son up from the couch and teetering out of frame into the kitchen.

“Alright,” started Zane, “Seems like it’s time for me to leave you three alone. Thanks for stopping in t’ chat.”

Harry chortled, readjusting his headphone one last time to sign off.

“Thanks again f’ havin’ me. Sorry my family crashed your interview.”

“It’s no bother at all, mate. ‘S actually quite refreshing seeing ye’ like this. I’m sure everyone watching would agree. Reminds us all that you’re human and not some robot with perfect hair and the voice of an angel.”

Harry hid his face in his hands, blushing for what felt like the thousandth time during this video call.

“I hope you lot continue to stay safe and healthy through all of this.”

“Thank you so much. You as well,” Harry added.

“Of course. Tell Y/N I’ll ring her up soon.”

“Will do,” Harry nodded, “If she doesn’t kill me f’ asking her t’ make me some toast first.”

#harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles imagine #harry styles one shot #harry styles x pregnant!reader #dad!harry #dad!harry x reader #dad!harry x pregnant!reader

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