#story so far just saw that didnt listen to them and issues and you me at six actually i would only know their basic songs

[eldritch-nightmare]

Hi! Could I get a creepypasta match up please!

I am 5 foot...not very blessed in the height department unfortunately, I'm slim but well endowed in both upper and lower departments. I'm fairly light for being Hispanic (i don't go outside in the sun often) I have shoulder length hair, its currently red and has been red for a hot minute, but in the past it used to be shorter and a different color every other week. Like for two weeks I could have purple hair then BOOM it's yellow now. I have 21 piercings. I have two in the center of my eyebrows, two nostril piercings. One on each side, a septum. And snake bites. I used to have My bridge pierced but I took it out bc it was in the process of migrating:/m I have 26 tattoos. IT SOUNDS LIKE A LOT. But it's not..THAT many when you actually get a good look at my full body. Most of them are on my thighs, I have some on my back, I have chest tattoos and a wrist tattoo. All my tattoos are either witchy, satanic, or of pretty pin up women and fruit.

Personality wise. I'm not sure, I have adhd, autism and bpd. I can be loud and excitable but also REALLY quite, aloof and awkward. I am a very passionate person and I'm always doing something (or at least trying to) I love to learn new things, I love to talk, I love to listen but I also love to just sit in absolute silence sometimes. I hate the sound of people sneezing, idk why it just REALLY upsets me. I can be really nice and helpful but I don't like being taken advantage of. I don't like confrontation but I will stand up for myself and or my friends if it's truly necessary. I am very giving, if someone I care about was in need I wouldn't mind giving them the shirt off my back or the shoes I'm wearing...it's happened before too. I also love shopping. I may have a slight....shopping addiction. I also have a very strong sense of justice and respect, so you won't catch me doing anyone dirty, but I won't let anyone do me dirty and ill cut them off if they keep crossing the line. I'm very good at sniffing out snakes. And I try to warn people around me about fake people and they never believe me until shit hits the fan, and then they sit there like ":0 I didn't know" TF YOU MEAN YOU DIDNT KNOW I TOLD YOU!?

I have daddy issues and don't have a stable father figure in my life 🧍🏻‍♂️ I love my mom though, shes cool

Style wise. I'm a bit all over the place, I've been in the alternate community since I was born. My dad was a metal head soo it kind of passed. But not really. Mental only stuck for so long. I tried scene, not my personal style but I loved the music. I was in the emo scene for a good couple of years until i started to hang out with the punk kids in my highscool, they were a little to much for me, activity wise though so it didn't last to long. But I found my home in the goth subculture and then from that point on, I explored the subcultures within that subculture. I tried nu goth, pastel goth, gothic lolita, trad goth. And none of them felt right, until I found gothabilly. And I find myself most comfortable in thag vintage style and the pin up style. My favorite brand (just so you can get an idea) is vixen by micheline pitt. My closet is just PURE black. With hints of black and white stripes and red.

I have many hobbies. I used to do tattoos on myself and my friends. I tried to get into piercing....it was a little too scary for me. I know how to make jewelry, I know how to paint, and draw. I know how to write, I love reading. I get too far down weird and obscure rabbit holes. I'm learning how to sew and I love it. I have a huge passion for fashion. And I want to start My brand one day. Even if it's small and for a niche group. I love to game, I love horror games especially, Outast is one of my favorite game series. I love horror period. Horror stories, movies, books. I love collecting specimens, like pinned bugs or mice in Jars. I have a small jar of bones. I love the dead. My favorite horror movie is either Saw or Scream. I also love watching indie disturbing horror movies as well. I'm a practicing witch, and I often use pendulums to communicate with. There was an old ghost of a woman who used to live in my apartment. She was cool sometimes but she messed with the doors and lights to much. I also used to collect dolls, specifically monster high dolls, but I wanted to branch out to haunted dolls...but then I thought mayybe that wouldn't be a good idea. I also love to cook and bake, and i love trying new food. I am also learning how to roller skate.

I don't like spiders though, which is ironic because I love spider web design and embroidery on my clothing. They just...look...ugly in. And their faces freak me out. I can't stand bad smells. I have a very very strong sense of taste and smell so I can be pretty sensitive around food and with bad odors. I don't like being woken up when I'm sleeping and I don't like being around loud obnoxious people.

Just for reference, I am afab nonbinary but present feminine to androgynous. I like both dudes and women and other NB people. My favorite creepypastas used to be Eyeless Jack, Bloody Painter, Jason the Toy Maker, the doll maker and the Puppeteer. I mean I liked ALL the pastas but they were my particular favorites

this feels so short in comparison to all that you sent me and i'm deeply sorry for that.

your matchup is... clockwork!

natalie is a very simple person, believe it or not. she's fairly blunt and isn't the type to bullshit a person so you don't have to worry about her taking advantage of you and your kindness. she's also really good at spotting snakes, so honestly you two could be a snake-sniffing duo and point out all the people you should avoid and whatnot.

she's an incredibly honest person as well and the type to never beat around the bush so if she wants to say something, she will say it.

she's a fairly emotionally reserved person so she doesn't wear her heart on her sleeve but when it's just the two of you, she lets her walls down a bit and she allows herself to relax a little.

she's more of a listener than a talker so she'll sit there and listen to you talk for hours. she doesn't mind sitting in silence either, because with you it's rather comfortable. but on the very rare occasion that she's the one doing all the talking, she'll definitely appreciate the fact that you're listening. it makes her feel seen in ways she could never describe.

natalie thinks you look good with any hair color, to be honest. i think in the beginning she was definitely a bit caught off guard by your spontaneous hair color changes but she gets used to it rather easily because it's just another part of you that she's fond of. she is just a bit concerned about your hair potentially getting damaged if you dye it too often but... she's not a hair expert, so. and honestly, she's thought about dying her hair as well, so. maybe you can recommend a color for her!

she also thinks you look wicked cool with your piercings and tattoos by the way. and she would absolutely love to hear about the meanings of your tattoos if any of them have one that you're willing to share with her.

she may not look like it, but natalie is pretty interested in fashion! she doesn't dabble in many styles herself because of various reasons but she is very interested in all of your own styles ranging from any goth and punk clothing you may own to the vintage and pin-up style you currently have going on.

if you asked natalie what her hobbies were she would probably just shrug and say, 'don't have any.' but trust me when i tell you that she does. she is so very much interested in deep diving into obscure topics and going down rabbit holes that she probably shouldn't go down because she loves learning about all the weird things buried underneath, hidden away from the average person.

honestly, you guys could probably make a date night out of deep diving into two separate topics and telling each other about it as you go. seems like it would be a pretty fun thing to do.

natalie doesn't particularly pay much attention to video games but she isn't against playing one or two if you recommend it to her! she's pretty invested in the things that you like, so she'll definitely play anything you recommend.

as for horror movies, natalie also probably doesn't give them much thought but trust me when i say she is a big fan of the saw franchise. i can see it now, you sitting her down to watch the saw movies and her just getting absolutely hooked and totally developing a crush on amanda young because honestly who doesn't. after the saw franchise, she's definitely more interested in horror than she was before and she'll probably sit down in her own time to watch some other movies just to talk about them to you.

always down to have her hair and nails done by you if you want to do them. she'll pay you as well, don't worry, just like... don't ask where she got the money because that would lead to a really awkward conversation probably. and she's also rooting for you to get into college to study fashion design!

so yeah anyways you guys would be a cute couple together and you'd have two cats and a rabbit named pumpkin or something and yeah.

#anon #creepypasta #creepypasta matchup #clockwork #clockwork x reader

[gothmoneyswag]

i know you left this as the tags on some old post but im interested in hearing your thoughts on d-vilman crybaby especially as someone who didnt read the original manga ^_^

yo ok so i haven't actually read the manga however. i have seen devilman crybaby and its got Issues imo. i can tend to break down most of my main complaints into 4 or 5 points. it might get a bit long so imma put it beneath the cut :) also because spoilers for specific things perhaps

possesion anime in general is kind of a hit or miss concept to me. imo the only "possession"/gets powers type anime i really care for is parasyte. tokyo ghoul didnt do much for me from what i saw, havent seen csm but it doesnt do much for me either. likewise devilman just... doesnt really do it for me as far as its premise and initial set up goes (side note: does code geass count here? i have so many thoughts on that series it wouldnt fit here but regardless)

i feel bad for saying this but i really do not like devilman crybaby's artstyle. like it just does not look good to me. im okay with different artstyles but this one just looks ugly. sorry

i feel like the story is just. poor. not good. it starts much too slow for how insane the story gets on later. if you take a show it influenced (evangelion), its pretty up front with its premise up front. i know people have made jokes for years about how eva gets weird and its a bait and switch but like.... not really? like at its core it is a mecha show about kids fighting aliens in robots and even with the character study stuff it doesnt veer that far from that initial premise. devilman crybaby has... a nightclub rave where akira gets posssessed so some white boy can play god while akira does good at track? like its not a strong start and it only gets worse from there. again, i know the reason the end of evangelion ends the way it does is BECAUSE of devilman but like. they just did not execute that ending correctly at all the final few episodes feels so constrained and so much happens in such a short period that it feels like the ultimate anticlimax. its hard for me to care about any of what happens because so much happens in so little time. its worthless and makes me feel nothing as a viewer. these bitches gay! good for them. good for them. what's not good for them is the story. cuz it sucks.

this ties in with my general distaste for the story but i also feel the characters are super weak. again, i feel nothing towards them and they all feel like cardboard cut outs with little personality to them at all. it all returns to nothing so i have no reason to care about them when theyre all gonna be killed off screen in the most contrived and terrible battle sequence maybe ever. ryo is the worst offender by far. his character fucking sucks dude. i dont think he even does anything in the story besides ruin akira's life and then sit in his ivory tower and act gay until the narrative decides "actually he was Satan the whole time!!" fuck you. and fuck those rap battle dudes too your bars fucking suck

i think a final point to end this on is that it is just far and away so much worse than everything it influenced. even if i read the manga or watched the original devilman, im pretty sure the story would remain much the same. and as such, there is literally not reason to watch devilman (much less crybaby) in 2023 when literally everything that came after it is better. i realize this is kind of a silly argument given how i listen to music but im standing by it. just watch evangelion. watch parasyte. watch berserk. play shin megami tensei. consume literally anything else that isn't this trite

i think that's all my main points. im sure i had more but i wrote this over the course of my day whenever id think of something else so. if i think of any more criticisms i had and forgot i'll reblog this and amend the post. sorry it's so long i just had way more to say that i originally thought. lol

#my post #asks #devilman #devilman crybaby #akira fudo #fudo akira #ryo asuka #not tagging this with the other anime i mentioned cuz that feels silly #also as i was looking up stuff for this post i remembered that one monogatari ass sequence with track meet and that one girl #like turning into a demon on live tv or something? #idk i just remember it being fucking stupid #nd that while being stupid i didnt think it was signifigant enough of a stupid thing to put into this mass of a post #yea. thats all i got. i think

[custerfuck]

I cant stand this ridiculous old ass picture bc I've seen 7 of these bands live would like to have seen way more and have to count who I Didnt listen to rather than who I did bc I listened to almost all of them and still do

#didnt listen to rise against #man overboard #the word alive #i see stars #the ghost inside #transit #fall out boy or panic beyond popular songs #the wonder years #the boys after #nevershoutnever #alkaline trio #falling in reverse beyond popular songs #relient k #we are the in crowd #stheart #3oh3 #escape the fate #i think thats it.. the rest i either actively listened to daily or know at least 1 album #story so far just saw that didnt listen to them and issues and you me at six actually i would only know their basic songs

[delicrieux]

☆ﾐ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”

PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN

y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.

─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 

author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!

ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.

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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 

Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.

Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 

But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.

Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”

You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.

But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 

Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.

That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 

You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 

Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.

Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.

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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”

Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.

“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”

While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.

r u dating sykkuno?

You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”

the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team

“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”

how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?

“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 

can i be adopted by ur parents plz

will you and corpse ever collab?!

You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.

Corpse_Husband: yes.

Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.

pack it up, sykkuno

More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 

“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”

we are prepared

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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.

y/n is a child murderer

“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”

take a break and go eat queen <3

“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”

Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 

“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 

The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 

“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”

Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”

“Your pizza came.”

“My what now?” You echo, confused.

“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”

“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”

Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.

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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”

If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 

looking hot, her message read. 

thanks, was all you replied with.

You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.

Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.

“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”

You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.

“Glad you liked it, baby.”

He was going to be the death of you.

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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707

more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙

#corpse husband #corpse #corpse husband x reader #corpse x reader #corpse husband imagine #corpse social media au #corpse husband fanfic #social media au #corpse husband x y/n #corpse x y/n #corpse husband fic #reader #xreader #imagine #imagines #myso #make you say oh

[reidsnose]

Window

overview: reader accidentally falls out of a window while having a late night talk with spencer (loosely based on the song: home by edward shapre and the magnetic zeros)

genre: angst? FLUFF

warning: blood, head injury, hospital visit, overdramatic reader thinks shes dying

a/n: i really really dont know if yall will like this but i do and i think its cute so please lmk what u think ab it :)

masterlist

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-

Spencer knew it wasn't the safest thing in the world. you did too. but something about sitting on the outside window ledge together, talking and laughing, was far too tempting of an offer to pass up. and besides, it was just over 6 feet off of the ground! whats the worst that could happen?

and so you sat, shoulders smushed together so you could both fit. a blanket wrapped around you both, keeping the cool night air locked out. however, you were so close together (and so flushed) that even without the blanket you'd both still be warm.

you adored nights like this with him, thinking to yourself how you got lucky enough to call him your best friend. to anyone else, it was obvious you two were deeply yet obliviously, painfully in love. you watched as he retold a memory he had of the two of you, eyes widening and hands peeking through the blanket to gesture wildly with each sentence. though you were listening to the story, growing more and more fond of the memory now that it was being told from his perspective, you couldn't help but be distracted by him. his essence. his being. he was...intoxicating.

and then he cut to the punch line and looked to you for a reaction, watching beauty radiate from you as you threw your head back and laughed. he didn't even realize how funny it was until he saw how hard you were laughing. and then you snorted, which of course caused you to laugh more. with tears nearly coming out of your eyes, you wrapped your hands around your aching stomach, trying to control your laughter and completely forgetting that you needed your hands to keep you balanced on the window.

he took you in, a tranquility like no other filling his heart.

and then it happen.

in slow motion he watched you lose your balance, unable to catch his grasp as you fell towards the ground outside. fear coursed through his veins as he tried to calculate every possible out come. and then suddenly time was back to normal, and you were on the floor, a fresh cut on your head.

without missing a beat he jumped out after you, landing far more gracefully than you had.

you felt him lift your head into his lap, barely hearing his muffled words. you nodded when he asked if you could hear him for the fourth time. and then you felt some blood trickle down your face. and you did not do well with seeing your own blood.

that was it. you were gonna die. you never told him how you felt and you were going to die. you could even feel death pulling on your eyelids.

in reality, you had landed on your hip and your head hit a pointy rock. it felt like hell but medically you would be just fine. it looked a lot worse than it actually was, head injuries produce far more blood than other body parts.

spencer knew this as he peeled the cardigan off of his shoulders, bunching it up and applying pressure to your wound.

he picked you up bridal style, trying hard to cradle your head at the same time. he was beyond relieved at how relatively minor this was going to be. you would heal, and you would be ok. he got to his car and gently placed you in the passenger seat before running to the drivers side and taking off as fast as he possible could.

"Spencer," you rasped.

"don't talk very much right now. don't worry i'm going to get you to the hospital just stay awake for me you've probably got a concussion." he explained, looking over worriedly.

"im going to die." you told him, your brain feeling foggy from seeing your own blood.

"no you wont. i promise you wont die."

you went on telling him again and again how you would die and how the team shouldn't cry for you. and he patiently explained every time that you would be ok. and as he carried you into the ER you took one look at the cardigan that had rested against your forehead and convinced yourself 110% that you were on your death bed.

so it was now or never.

"Spencer before i die i want you to know that i love you. i always have. i just had to get it off my chest before i left this world with you still in it." you blurted as the doctors began to take you away.

he stood there, mouth agape at your confession.

"she is not going to die." one of the doctors reassured Spencer before turning on his heels and jogging to catch up with the rest of them.

it had to have been the loss of blood. or maybe a concussion fogged your thinking. or maybe he's in shock and he's hearing things. because there is no possible way that that just happened.

and so he sat in the waiting room for nearly an hour while they stitched up your head, nervously tapping his foot to match the pace of his racing thoughts.

he was thinking through every single moment the two of you had ever shared, wondering if-hoping that there was some truth to your confession, when they called out your name. he shot up faster than he ever had before, even getting a little light headed at the sudden quick stance.

he walked in to see you sitting up, drinking some apple juice that the nurses had brought you. and even then, in a hospital bed with half a dozen stitches in your forehead, you looked more beautiful than ever. he was astonished. absolutely astonished at just how radiant you were. your eyes twinkles as you smiled at him.

"so false alarm.. i didnt die." you joked, trying to hide your embarrassment, handing him a hospital issued jello.

"im so glad youre ok. you know i told you from the start we shouldnt have sat on the window," he chuckled, eyes feeling teary for a reason unknown to him.

"i know i know, you're always right." you giggled a little before wincing in pain from it.

his hand came up and lightly brushed your hair back, soothing you so much your eyes immediately fluttered closed. he had to bring it up, he had to know.

"did you mean it?" he asked.

you tried to control your heart rate while you played it dumb, "well yeah i really did think i was going to die."

"thats not what i meant."

"i know." you admitted. "yes. i meant it. i still mean it and if thats weird for you and you want to leave i completely understand-"

he cut you off by pressing his lips to your own, soft but passionate, tasting of jello.

it was a better profession of love than any speech he could try to make. because regardless of how many big words he used, it wouldn't be enough. not to mention that being around you makes his brain turn into mush, rendering it completely useless.

your heart rate monitor started going absolutely wild, beeping quickly and erratically. you both started laughing into the kiss, reluctantly pulling away. euphoria coursed through your veins, two lovesick bozos in the hospital.

you two talked for a little, buzzed from the kiss., smiling like a couple of idiots. but you were happy. sitting in the hospital with a cracked open head and you were still happy. because Spencer was there. and he makes you happy.

after talking to the doctor and a phone call with hotch, you were told to take two weeks off of work. spencer insisted that he go home early every day so he can come over and take care of you. and that was fiinnneee by you.

-

-

ultra mega super cool taglist:

@mac99martin @imhreid @spencersmagic @hollydaisy23 @raelady1184 @a-broken-pact @padfootswife @hey-there-angels @star-stuff-in-the-cosmos @sonnydoesrandomshit @averyhotchner @laurakirsten0502 @reidyoulikeabook @rem-ariiana @spencerreid9 @vampire-overlord @takeyourleap-of-faith @s1utformgg @violetspoetic

#criminal minds #spencer reid #spencer reid fanfic #reid #spencer reid x reader fluff #spencer reid x reader #dr spencer reid #criminal minds fanfiction #aaron hotchner #derek morgan #garcia #hotch #morgan #penelope garcia #emily prentiss #prentiss #jennifer jereau #jj #david rossi #rossi

[wizkiddx]

hiiiii i love your stuff - could u do one where the readers ill but they have stuff to do and tom has to look after her. maybe if they were just friends before too but both pining? thankuuuuuuuuu

should I be writing this instead of revising? clearly fucking not. Did I make this little blurb req ridiculously long purely to procrastinate? Of fucking course.

but also this was v cute! I assumed u meant famous!reader, sorry if that's not what u were after at all anon x

summary: Tom Holland turns into the readers knight in shining armour when they get ill during promo

warnings: fainting / feeling ill

///////////////////

It couldn’t be today. Of all days, why today? You’d been at home for two weeks doing absolutely nothing, before this trip. And yet it’s when your itinerary is packed to the brim, people moving heaven and earth just speak to you. Two weeks of unrelenting press for Marvels next big ensemble movie. 

Your manager was speaking to you, reeling off a run down of todays activities but instead of listening you nodded along blankly - head rather cloudy with this heavy mist that was not shaking off, no matter how hard you tried. 

“You got that Y/n/n?” Lucy pointedly spoke, eyes almost physically knocking you backwards as if her eyeliner was battery rams. Fumbling with your thoughts, your answer wasn’t particularly cohesive earning you just a disappointed head shake. 

“I um… yeh I think. Who-who did you say I was paired up with?” 

“Y/n please for the love of god. Tom, like I said the past fifty times.” And to be fair to Lucy she wasn’t wrong. It was the first major major promo tour for the both of you and after just two days so far - you were both exhausted. She was more than allowed to be a bit short tempered. 

“But we-we hardly know each other? The chemistry won’t be there and-“

“As I said, I tried to re-jig it but Kevin is of the mind that acting is your job.” Her tone was sharp but as she glared across the opposing seats, in the little mini van Marvel had hired for you as transportation, her eyes softened. Lucy had been so wrapped up in her own stress she may have overlooked quite how gingerly you were sitting. By the time she had arrived at the hotel, your stylist had already managed to half save your ghoulish looking face, with sunken under eyes and tired skin, so it wasn’t so blatantly obvious how crap you were feeling.  “Is everything okay with you?” 

It felt pretty puny to say that the jet lag from flying to Tokyo had been weighing you down further than you wanted, or that the local cuisine top chefs had kindly prepared for you last night wasn’t siting well in your stomach. To be honest, even you thought it was just your body being a bit overdramatic. So in response, you put on your best happy-go-lucky face feigning a smile.

“No no I’m fine, just want to give the best interviews I can and you know…. I’m awkward as hell as it is, then pair me with the most talented actor that I share about two minutes of screen time with…it’ll be interesting.” 

The way Lucy reacted with a weird slow nod, eyebrows furrowed, meant it was quite apparent you had perhaps overplayed that one. Had you not been so over the day before it even began, you would’ve tried again to give a more believable act. But as you were, you turned your attention back out to the bustling streets of Tokyo and the high rise buildings bordering each pavement. 

You didnt have a problem with Tom, far from it in fact. Tom was hilarious and the times you had met him, you’d both built up this weird and sarcastic competitiveness with each other. It was a game of who could get the last laugh, each of you pushing each other with the Mickey taking just a little further. Of course, not in a malicious way, just the way you’d both lived pretty similar but parallel careers - when everyone drew comparisons between the both of you, it was nice to make it a joke. 

Like Tom you’d also started out on stage, had a ‘big break’ movie as a kid and then spent your teenage years on and off film sets - till marvel happened. Then everything blew up to epic proportions, changing your life forever. Actually, it was so similar to Tom’s story, plus the fact you were also from the south west of the UK. It was bizarre your paths hadn’t crossed more - He probably could’ve been a useful ally in the the whole ‘becoming famous’ thing. 

And yet, you could probably count on two hands the amount of conversations you’d had with him. 

Now that, that was the issue. Right from the beginning you learn what the press want and when you are publicising a movie you cater into it too. They’d all be asking for the insider scoop on set; what pranks you’d pulled on each other; what was the most annoying thing about each other. Which is hard if you’d only had 5 or 6 days actually on set together. 

By the time the cab had wormed its way through the Tokyo traffic and you arrived at the PR hotel, it was already 9:30 - making you 15 minutes late (blame it on the traffic). Instantly then you were ushered straight to the interview room for the evening, no chance of green room chat or grabbing a drink before. The place was stuffy, everything was draped with black curtains except the poster board that Tom was already sitting infront of. 

He’d scrubbed up well, no doubt about it. He was wearing statement-ish burgundy suit trousers, teamed with a black knitted but collared shirt thing - that was clearly tailor made for the man. As soon as he noticed you scurry into the room, his face broke out into a warm smile, jumping up to greet you in a friendly hug. It was brief, and as you pulled back you accidentally bumped your head on one of the overhanging lights. No doubt someone had spent a ridiculous amount of time configuring them so they were positioned perfectly, which you had just ruined with your big head. 

“Oh shit!” Tom just laughed in response, shaking his head slightly as he lead you the two steps across to your pre-positioned seats. 

“Making an entrance as always I see!”

“Yeh, you know me, a bit of chaos just to keep everyone on their toes.”

“Oh is that why you’re ‘fashionably late’” With a playful wiggle of his eyebrows, you just rolled your eyes, fidgeting on the chair to find a position that didnt aggravate  your stomach so much.

“I’m ready now though! What did I miss? Just having to pretend to be your friend for 15 minutes?” You stressed the words as though the thought of conversation with Tom was the absolute worst thing in the world - which you definetly didnt think. Scowling like you’d insulted his dog Tessa, it was almost visible how the cogs were turning in his head looking for a comeback. Unfortunately for him though, he was quickly shut up but the organiser bringing the first interviewer in . 

For what would, no doubt, be a long day. 

////

Everything had started off so well, the banter was flowing between you and Tom, no major spoilers revealed that meant Marvel would have to make the journalist disappear. It was once you hit an hour of back-to-back interviews that everything started to crack bit. Because yes, it had only been an hour but that was enough to exhaust you on this particular day. When Tom joked around you got slower and slower, similarly the  energy was zapped from your own answers. It’s not very compelling when someone says ‘you have to watch this movie’ in a monotonous voice with sullen eyes. 

As the interviewers were swapping in and out, Tom actually lightly nudged your shoulder.

“Everything alright? We’re trying to sell tickets and you’ve got a face like thunder.”

“Oh no-no sorry I just, I-um.”

“You want some water?” Now looking at your with more concerned eyes, as if he was just nervous he’d actually offended you for calling you a boring bastard. And you would’ve picked up on it and alleviated his concerns, if it weren’t for the fact your eyes were glued on the water bottle he was holding out to you. You were thirsty. You knew that, that wasn’t the conundrum. What you weren’t so sure about was whether your stomach would accept it, or more violently reject it. In a very non ‘we’re-trying-to-sell-a-movie’ style. 

But the lightheaded fogginess in your brain won out, as you nodded jerkily, taking the bottle and taking a little swig - too cautious to take anymore. 

Now concerned with how Tom thought you were being a Debby-downer too, you managed to perk yourself up for the next four interviews. They were easy, asking questions without any activity and though you did rely on Tom beefing out and adding to your answers, it was okay. Then the next interviewer came in, who you recognised as being from the BBC, Ali Plumb, that had interviewed you a number of times. From the way Tom jumped up to give him afirendly bro-hug, you guessed he also was familiar with him. As soon as he took a seat the cameras were already flashing with the red light, demonstrating his 7 minutes had already started. 

“Guys! It’s been a while.” 

“How are you Ali?” You started it off with the pleasantries, Tom echoing, before the speccy dirty-blonde asked his first question. 

“So the last time I spoke to you guys the universe was in chaos, Peter Parkers on the run and Aurora Blake was trying to strip her own powers, so I guess my first question is how are you both doing? We can use this as a therapy session if you guys need.” His very typical nerdy joke made Tom laugh, nodding as he leaned forward and repositioned a bit. 

You didn’t share the same humour though, more focused on this invisible blanket of stuffiness that seemed to have been thrown on top of you. It made you feel groggy, incredibly hot and so unbelievable nauseous. The lights weren’t helping either, it felt like you were pouring with sweat from your forehead. You thought Tom was answering Ali, even if you couldn’t really hear  - everything had merged into a deafening roar. Adrenaline coursed through your veins, unconsciously making you fumble yourself to standing, desperate to get somewhere with fresh air. The last thing you saw before your vision tunnelled into darkness was Tom, reaching out to try and catch you. 

Because next thing you knew, you were on the floor, wires from all the cameras and lights digging into your back as you looked up to see Tom on one side and Lucy on the other - both wearing a similarly panicked expression. You knew you hadn’t been out long, seconds if that, going by the fact everyone else was in the ‘oh my god’ phase of panic. It was a bit weird how calm you where, but then again all your life you’d been the ‘class fainter’. Waking up on the floor was something you were long since used to. 

“Y/n? You awake?” Rather stating the obvious Tom asked the question as you bent your head up - allowing you sight of all the concerned facing oggling you. With a defeated sigh, you flopped your head back. 

“If this is a dream then it’s a real bloody nightmare.” This time Tom didnt seem to appreciate your joke, looking at you without almost dumbfounded eyes, as you blinked repetitively and groaned. 

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Lucy appeared to want to lecture you, which to be honest wasn’t the most time appropriate. You were still on the floor, legs crumpled up under you, so ignored her. Instead you pulled yourself up into a sitting position, taking a moment to blink away the blotchy haze that threatened to takeover your vision once again, whilst the pair above you both cautiously rested their palms on each of your shoulders -trying to be useful. The room still felt cramped and stifling, as everyone around were no doubt looking at you. 

It took a few minutes but your body seemed to get over itself, sitting up normally and trying to make small talk with Ali - who, by the way, was still sat awkwardly in the chair. Still nestled on the floor, your back up against the chair you had been siting on as you raved with Ali of the Harry Potter theatre show. In a natural lull in conversation, Tom perked up - from the door where he’d been muttering with the organiser as Lucy bit her nails nervously. 

“Y/n you need to go home.” 

All of you knew what Tom said was impossible. Not being egotistical, but you were too important. Although you hadn’t been paying masses of attention for Lucy’s run down of your itinerary - you knew it was packed. 

So you just looked up and rolled your eyes at Tom, earning yourself a strong glare, before locking the organiser in eye contact.

“How many have we got till lunch?” 

“Um this gent here” He gesturned toward Ali, who was almost squirming in his seat now “then two more.”  

“And then lunch?” 

“Yes, then you have a personal appearance at a dinner, so transport will be coming to pick you both up.” This poor guy seemed obsessed with the clock and his timetable, looking at your with a mixture of panic and frustration. You should know this stuff, you should’ve listened to Lucy. 

“How fars the drive?” 

“At this time probably an hour and a half.” 

The plan was clear in your head, you’d sort yourself out in the car and be fully fine by the afternoon and evening engagements. Plus you felt almost fine now. So with a sigh, you hauled yourself up onto the chair, patting for Tom to sit back down. 

“It’s half an hour and then I’ll sort myself out at lunch - come on their waiting.” The way Lucy pouted showed she disagreed somewhat, except a stern look kept her from protesting, as Tom walked toward you. 

“Are you sure you don’t loo-“

“Let me stop you before you insult my appearance.” Snickering slightly at his worried face, you laughed it off , knocking his side with a gentle murmur of ‘don’t worry about me’. 

In fact after that little episode you did feel a little recovered, which meant you were properly noticing the change in the boy sat next to you. Throughout the remaining three interviews he’d done a complete 360 from earlier. Rather than trying to get little digs at you, he had become fiercely protective - jumping in if a questions wasn’t particularly appropriate or relevant to the movie ( meaning when an awfully crap man asked what underwear you’d been able to wear in your suit) ; taking the heat of the conversation as well as just watching you like a hawk. Each time you answered his beady brown eyes were watching you from the side, you got the impression it wasn’t only just because of the risk of spoilers. 

Quite remarkably, you survived the rest of the day pretty well, after a power nap in the car on the way over - even if it was a bit difficult when you had your manager watching you like a hawk from the seat across. It was as if Lucy had never seen anyone ill before, she seemed concerned that you were going to spontaneously stop breathing and die at any point. 

Though by the time all the official business at the dinner was done, your body and willpower had reached the end of their tether. You and Tom were both on a round table, surrounded by 6 CEOs and execs of what seemed to be a multimillion pound business enterprise. With the language barrier meaning you had to speak through the two people on the table who were fluent in both japanese and English, the conversation was already pretty jilted. Though to be fair, the six did seem to be enjoying the evening - something you werent able to reciprocate. Thankfully, five minutes after the main course dishes had been collected, Tom spoke up from his position opposite you.

“This has been lovely and we really appreciate your time and generosity but me and Y/n have a really early start tomorrow so I think we should probably get back to the hotel.” You swore in that moment you could’ve kissed him, and it looked like Tom could tell - by the way your shoulders sagged and you let out an exhale of pure relief. Apparently even if you’d managed to convince the hosts you were enjoying the evening, Tom easily saw through the performance. After some hurried goodbyes, Tom led you out of the hall with his hand hovering over your lowerback, trying to make sure your exit was as discreet as possible. 

Away from the bubble of chatter and activity, in the deserted hallway, Tom stopped you - lightly holding both hands on each of your arms. 

“Wheres your team?” 

“Um Luce is back at the hotel, she was trying to see if she could reschedule any of my stuff tomorrow.” You winced at the way he sighed, realising you were all on your own in some random business event hall in Tokyo.

“Harry -my brother- is waiting in the car at the front - is that okay?”

“No Tom, don’t worry abo-“

“Yeh well I am and I think you feel ten times worse than you’re letting on.” He spoke harshly, like a school teacher telling you off - except the hint of a kind smile at the end was a dead giveaway. 

“You sure?” 

With a relieved nod (Tom had thought you might be a bit more stubborn - you obviously were really really ill) he wordlessly shrugged his suit jacket off, wrapping it round your shoulders. He muttered something about not wanting you to catch a chill but to be quite honest you were a bit distracted by the woody cedar smell of Toms aftershave that enveloped your senses. Maybe it wasn’t so bad being fussed on by him? To be fair he wasn’t wrong either, you were in a strapless evening dress - you would’ve preferred to be in joggers, but Marvels press team had other ideas. 

After a quick pit stop at the toilets, the two of you managed to make an unnoticed escape out the building - into a big SUV which had seconds prior pulled up onto the steps. You literally melted into the nearest window seat, body hunching over as you probably crumpled Tom’s jacket beyond belief. 2 seats along from you, a frizzy haired boy gave you a sympathetic smile, which you returned weakly whilst muttering a ‘hi’. Meanwhile, Tom pulled the sliding door shut, sitting across from you. 

“Oh Y/n this is Harry and Harry this is Y/n.” In unison both of you replied with an ‘I know’ eye roll. Your response was somewhat more shocking to both Holland boys, you could tell from the way they had this whole nonverbal conversation with their eyes - they were very clearly brothers. Needing to explain you continued. “I like to keep tabs on my castmates, I’ve seen you on Toms instagram.” That had both boys smirking, Harry presumably just because you knew who he was; Tom more smugly, you’d just given away you slightly stalked him on instagram. 

Silence reigned for a moment, as the driver put his foot down slightly. 

“How you doing?” Tom asked. 

“Mhm…” you thought for a second, how to eloquently describe the sensation. 

“shit.” 

Both boys chuckled a little and even though you had closed your eyes in an attempt to dull the throbbing behind your temples, you could feel the eyes on you. 

“You want the music off?” Harry asked, referring to the indie-rock coming quietly out the speakers of his laptop, which was resting on his lap. With a shake of your head you refused, even if really silence probably would help your head, you were already causing the two Hollands enough trouble - no need to bore them during the journey back into central Tokyo, especially when you weren’t the most enthusiastic company ever. 

Thankfully the music stayed on a low volume, whilst the car seemed to settle into a comfortable silence. With a long exhale you fluttered your eyes open, seeing Tom focused on his phone, before you rested the side of your head against the black-out glass. Taking some relief from the cool glass, you huddled further into the corner of the car against the door.

Floating in the space between sleep and wakefulness, you were kind of aware of your head occasionally bobbing and jerking about - but really didn’t have the energy or willpower to do anything about it. Instead, the thing that perked your attention was hearing some supposed-whispering from inside the body of the car.

“I know she said she didn’t care but she was clearly lying-“ 

“Like you know! You’ve been desperate to try and spend some time with Y/n- maybe you poisoned her just so you could be all knight-in-shini-“

“Turn. The. Music. Off.” Tom sounded scathing now, and with a grumble from your other-side the cheery drum beats ceased.

“Happy now?” …and Harry was sarcastic. 

“Swap places with me.”

“What?”

“Just do it.”

“Why?”

“So she can lie down.” 

“Well no because you would still be in the way if we swapped.”

“Yeh but she can lie on my lap idiot.”

“She can lie on me.”

“She doesn’t know you!”

“Well for 1, barely ten minutes ago she said she did know me. And 2, she doesn’t know you any better!”

If this was their version of whispering, you would love to hear what volume ‘shouting’ was. There was no reply for a short while, you imagined the two brunettes locked in some intense staring match.The next time Tom spoke he sounded more defeated - almost begging. 

“If I admit you beat me at the driving range the other day will you-” 

“I KNEW IT!” Harry yelped, the volume making you jerk, eyes flying open before reflexively closing because the light was too bright. There was a little mutter of an apology, then silence again. 

Once agin you must’ve drifted off because it felt like absolutely no time had passed when a firm but gently hand on your shoulder nudged you awake. 

Sure enough the boys had swapped position, Tom now sitting along the seat from you, Harry looked a little sulky from across the way. It was Tom who was reaching over, a gentle and peaceful smile on his face.

“You wanna lie down? Don’t want you to strain your neck.” He wasn’t wrong, adding to the throbbing headache, the cloudiness in your brain and the unsettled feeling in your stomach… now your neck hurt. Just bloody great. 

Had you been your normal witty and perceptive self, you might’ve teased Tom as to why him and his brother had done a switch - but everything hurt and all you wanted to do was sleep for a hundered years. So with squinting eyes you jerkily nodded, missing how Tom chuckled to himself. The guy undid your seatbelt, then sat back to let you balance the back of your head on his thigh, looking up at the roof of the SUV. Already your eyes were closed again, you kicked off your slip-on heels and bent your legs up to lean against the backrest - occupying the position you had been sat in before hand. You felt his hands reposition the jacket, pulling it round so it was now like a blanket tucked under your chin. 

To be fair it was much more comfortable than sitting up and you weren’t even aware of how quickly you dropped back into sleep. 

Though it wasn’t quick enough to miss Harry’s very sulky sounding comment, presumably meant only for Tom’s ears. 

“Still think you’re being fucking creepy bro.” 

<33 lemme know what u think! (would make me feel less guilty for not doing all the work I rlly should be doing aha)

tagging : @hallecarey1 @crossyourpeter @hollandfanficlove

#tom holland x reader #tom holland #tom Holland angst #tom Holland fluff #tom holland x you #tom holland x y/n #tom holland x actress!reader #tom holland x famous!reader #harry holland #tom holland request

[currently-hyperfixating]

Danganronpa V3 Pregame Headcanons

hey Y’all! I have an imagines post on the way, but in the mean time have some of my V3 headcanons

TW/CW: Almost All Pregame V3 Characters (Excluding Kaito, Shuichi, K1-B0, Tsumugi And Kaede), Mentions Of Abuse And Self-Esteem Issues, Mention Of Violence

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Maki Harukawa Maki was always all for mindless violence, and what better place to be violent than a killing game. There were no other motivations behind her audition and she told the team just as much. She was thrilled when they told her that she would be the strongest character, unparalleled by even the martial arts masters of the previous seasons. However she was never told that they would be changing her motivations, making her broken and unwilling to kill. She went into the killing game hoping to come out on a mountain of corpses, to be feared by everyone in the outside world. She got her wish, just not in the way that she wanted.

Kokichi Oma Kokichi was a nervous boy, despite what he may tell you. He was constantly terrified of everything around him, but lied his way through life to convince everyone he was okay. He wasn’t sure why he auditioned for Danganronpa, maybe he wanted a place where his constant fear would be justified, maybe he wanted a new world to recreate himself in, maybe he just wanted an excuse to let it all out and break down. His one request of the team was to “make me more like myself but... better.” They listened to his request, making him more confident and snarky, but his constant lying had become such an extreme part of who he was, that the team kept it. After all, he asked to be himself.

Miu Iruma Miu was hopeless at romance. Well, not like she wanted actual romance anyway. All she wanted was for everyone to swoon at her presence and kiss the ground she walked on. She wanted to be a gorgeous celebrity, known and admired all over the world. The kind of celebrity that you would hardcore crush on for years. What better way to do that then to audition for the worlds most popular TV show. She wanted to be the fanservice character and asked the team as much. They complied with her request, but decided to take it a more comedic route, using all of the worst troupes and making her little more then a desperate mockery. She was the fanservice alright, but she will never be as widely loved.

Ryoma Hoshi Ryoma had been watching the show for as long as he can remember. He had always looked up to the strong-willed and awe-inspiring protagonists. He didn’t really have anyone else in his life to look up to, so he clung to these characters like glue, using them almost as a guide on how to live. “What would Makoto do here? How would Hajime handle this?” When he heard that there were auditions for the new season, he did everything he could to get an audition. When the team asked him about what kind of character he wanted to be, he just repeated over and over about how he wanted to be the protagonist. He wanted to be an inspiration to people. He asked this of them so much that they casted him as a weak-willed character with nothing to live for. They had already chosen their protagonist and his constant inquiries had made them grow petty against him.

Rantaro Amami Rantaro had never had a good relationship with his family. His parents gave him a boat to live on when he was old enough and them seized all contact. He had sisters, in fact he was the only son, but all of his sisters had moved across the world for college and none of them really left on a good note with him. His only chance at a new life, and therefore a new family, was auditioning for Danganronpa, The only request he made was that he be an only child and an orphan. This was an odd request so the team pried for more information, and his story gave them a very interesting idea.

Korekiyo Shinguji Kiyo hated humanity. he hated it to the point of it being an intense obsession. To him, it was full of heartless people who would do nothing but take advantage of him, while everyone else just stood by and refused to believe him. people would get close enough to him for him to consider them family, only for them to shatter his trust and leave him broken. he wanted an escape from it all, and he wanted the recognition that would get people to believe him. he thought auditioning for the show would get enough attention that he could finally share his story, he was desperate to join and he made the team aware of it. He didnt want to be loved or hated, he just wanted to be memorable, and the team happily complied.

Kirumi Tojo Kirumi felt useless. For her entire life she had been told to “get out the way” or “just let me do it, you’re messing it up.” She felt like every time she tried to help, she just ended up making the situation worse. It did severe damage to her self esteem and she ended up not even being able to do things for herself, becoming extremely dependant of those around her. She had heard of Danganronpa, everyone had, but she never thought she would be much good in a killing game. She had no intention of auditioning until she heard that they would be completely changing your personality and give you your own ultimate talent. She went to the audition room and asked to be cast as the ultimate maid. “I just want to be helpful. I want everyone to be able to rely on me for once.”

Angie Yonaga Angie was the type to idolise those with power, and she wanted nothing more than to have that same level of power for herself. She fawned over the antagonists from previous seasons, holding them on a pedestal. She had always been adamant that she would be one day get into a season of Danganronpa and become the most powerful antagonist yet. She wanted to manipulate and twist the other participants to her will, and walk out of the killing game without having raised a finger. She wanted to put herself on the highest pedestal of all, towering above those that she idolised for so long. When auditioning, she tried her hardest to prove how good of an antagonist she would be. All of her talk of manipulation and basically wanting to be a god gave the team a great idea. 

Gonta Gokuhara Gonta was a fearless man, which fit his intimidating build. He wasn’t scared of heights, or the dark, or ghosts. He wasn’t even afraid of death, making him a great candidate for a killing game. He had been introduced to Danganronpa when some friends of his wanted to see just how far his lack of fear went. He had been watching the show ever since, always commenting about how they shouldn’t have hesitated and “I would be so much better at this than those wimps.” Upon hearing that auditions were being held for the next season, Gonta’s friend’s held him to that statement and pushed him to audition. The team were impressed with his courage, but were persistently prying for any kind of phobia they could get out of him. They eventually got one. Bugs. They knew exactly what to do with this information.

Himiko Yumeno Himiko loved attention. All she ever wanted was to be the centre of the world and have everyone know her name. She spent her life wishing she had the talent of an ultimate so she could use it to become famous all over the globe. She spent years trying to decide what talent she could have that would give her the best chance of drawing a crowd. She eventually decided on magic, seeing how magicians could awe people of any age. She waited for years to find the opportunity to audition, and when it finally came she took it quickly. She was adamant that she wanted to be the best magician, and she wanted everyone to know it. The team saw the opportunity and made her so good at magic, that not even she believed they were tricks anymore.  

Tenko Chabashira Tenko was weak. That was a fact that she couldn’t deny. She could never quite get the hang of fighting and never had any way to defend herself. This led her to surrender easily when threatened, even pushing other people under the bus just so she could escape unharmed. She had always envied that characters in her favourite show, how they were all so much stronger than her both physically and mentally. She swore that if she ever got the opportunity to be in a killing game, she would be stronger. She didnt care how hard she had to fake it, she would definetly convince her classmates that she was not someone to be messed with. She was nervous when she heard about the auditions, but decided to give it a go. She told the team about how all she ever wanted was to be strong and they complied, taking full advantage of the fact that she had no other requests.

#danganronpa #danganronpa headcanons #danganronpa killing harmony #v3 #danganronpa v3 #tenko chabashira #pregame korekiyo #pregame himiko #pregame maki #pregame tenko #pregame gonta #pregame kirumi #pregame angie #pregame rantaro #pregame ryoma #pregame miu #pregame kokichi #korekiyo shinguji #himiko yumeno #maki harukawa #gonta gokuhara #kirumi tojo #angie yonaga #rantaro amami #ryoma hoshi #miu iruma #kokichi ouma #kokichi oma #headcanon #headcanons

[artreider]

Station 19 returns in a little over 2 weeks so im going to try to finish my rewatch this week.

Im doing todays rewatch while my daughter plays we'll see if i can work this out.

This is one one of my favorite episodes but im liable to cry watching it again.

Ugh dixon why cant we have lost him this season.

I love the family talks between the crew to start the episode and jack with his seemingly random trivia/information that he just feels like educating his team about.

Poor vic you can see how much she is struggling as the news is on and her crew discusses protesting and police brutality.

I love what Montgomery says that things felt different right after george floyd and breonna taylor were killed, like something was going to change. But now a year plus out i cant help but feel like nothing is really changing, like we all forgot what we saw.

I do love their shirts.

Oh maya trying to navigate being there for her team, doing whats right and whats expected of her. I don't envy her. Also its all in vain and she came so far and is the best captain.

Hughes wanting to change the subject and celebrate marina's engagement, i love her but my heart hurts for her. I also love the support for maya from her team.

I know some fans take issue with vic calling it a lesbian wedding but im onebof those who isnt. That comes from a bisexual woman married to a bisexual woman who normally just tells people she is gay or a lesbian because ita simpler. And also because you can sometimes avoid the inevitable question of why did i choose a woman instead of a man.

I love the i could barely agree to get carina to marriage line and i dont know why.

There's hererra eating away lol; either they just had fun messing with fans or really planned the long game pregnancy. Is it possible we'll see glimpses of her pregnancy in flashbacks this season and then she'll have a baby in present day. This could've been their way of getting around having to film a pregnancy over the course of a season and keeping andy in the action. Hmmm

Vic and travis, i love them. Im glad travis trying to get vic to open up. I just want to hug vic so much, i cant imagine what she's going through.

Barrett kills this episode.

Bishop is right, vic cant be objective she needs to foucs on her family and trust her team.

I love watching maya captain.

Asshole kids.

Vic talking about her team is love. In light of the following episode i wish we could've had them all be introduced to her folks on screen. Also i need fics of how the wedding came to be at the restuarant and just marina month apart after becoming engaged.

Ugh between the popo and news its like vultures outside the fire. Also the portrayal of the news pisses me off as a news producer. Thats not to say some news stations may have agendas or some reporters an inability to seperate themselves from the story but in my experience that is few and far between.

"Fire" "whatever your question is the answer is fire and we are working to put it out" ugh i love the bde and quote from maya. And the "buhbye" so much love here.

These officers are out of line, if you cant do your job properly then hand in your badge you pos. Love the female officer here, ill take more of her. Clearly she has no issue with the station or the lawsuit.

Im glad dean listened to maya and didnt question her. I also just realized she said "ill deal with pd", such a good captain putting herself between the pos and her team.

As maya watches vic and her family you can just see her heart going out to them.

Ugh vic you need all the hugs, also mama hughes is so stubborn lol but i love her.

I love them ribbing on andy about eating and her choice of food as well as her loud stomach rumbles.

Too much bad news delivered by emails/texts to the team.

Its not fair the team seems upset with maya about the city's decision.

Perv andy lol also totally pregnant. Also the look she gave sullivan when they were on their way to the fire just screamed i know im pregnant and love my baby daddy.

Theo means well and im glad travis is letting him help.

Sometimes moms say things and mean well but they just dont come across right.

Stupid news reporter.

I love this scene and mama hughes. "Let it burn" so succinct. She is an icon. The recitement of the names never fails to bring tears to my eyes.

That her parents know the names rings differently for vic, its like she feels seen amd that maybe they werent as unaware as they came across.

Jack seems so lost and is just trying to understand the world and himself. I just want him to find his purpose and happiness. I swear it just seems like he'll be the next person killed off after finding his happiness.

I love the boards dedicated to vic, just goes to show sometimes parents care more than they seem and are just not good at showing it. They are so proud of her.

Them both telling just a second made me chuckle so much.

The apology may not bring back michael but its important none the less.

Im glad maya checked on dean. And the solution they came up with. Side note danielle looks so good in this scene, i may have a crush.

Fhe breath she takes when he stops her from leaving, it hurts me. I take it as she is bracing herself for the worst especially when he says he doesnt want to be disrespectful. Its still hard for her to believe she has the teams unwavering support. I love dean telling maya to have a wedding for her station.

The breaking the plates scene i love it. Love the conversations between vic and her mom.

The breaking of the plates, such love.

#station 19 #victoria hughes #barrett doss #travis montgomery #ben warren #robert sullivan #andy herrera #jack gibson #dean miller #maya bishop

[arizona-trash-bag]

I can totally explain a bit of my thinking behind seeing lwj as autistic and wwx as autistic/adhd!! Before I get into specifics though, let me preface with where I’m coming from. I first saw CQL and then read the EXR translation of the novel. I prefer MDZS to CQL, but also want to acknowledge that because I do not read/speak Mandarin I am inherently experiencing this story second-hand and therefore am probably missing out on a lot of nuances. I am trying to learn Mandarin, but it will be a long time before I am even a little close to fluent lol.

Another preface- obviously not all autistic people present in the same way, and many of the things that I will mention are not solely specific to autistic people either. It’s one of those things where all of it added up together points towards asd, but each one individually would not on its own indicate asd, you know? Also, I will say that many of the things I picked up on for both characters are autistic traits that many autistic people have vs the clinical characteristics (much like most of the case I could make for wwx’s adhd would be adhd traits he has rather than symptoms that would lead to a real-world diagnosis.) Edit: OH! I almost forgot to say, that also all of these traits I’m listing are from a western perspective, and I would LOVE to read more about how autism presents in different cultures and to see conversations between autistc Chinese people specifically, so as to see if these traits are specific to western autistic people or not, but again, I do not speak Mandarin or Cantonese or any other Chinese dialect, so that’s a little inaccessible for me atm.

Ok, SO, for both characters I would list: strong sense of justice, lack of care for society’s opinion (I feel like it could be argued that lwj does to a certain point, but imo he operates more from what he morally considers to be correct and from a place of familial duty vs catering to the opinion of society at large), and then more vaguely, they both seem to be “nerdy” (this doesnt feel like the most accurate term, especially because it's not like being scholarly is specific to their characters, especially in ancient fantasy China- it’s more that their particular hmmm, flavor?? of love of knowledge feels very neurodivergent to me, vs like, being scholarly because it’s the thing that is expected of a Young Master, if that makes any sense at all- like the difference btwn someone getting an engineering degree because it is expected of them vs because they genuinely love engineering), and lastly for both- I would say that they are canonically kinky, and while I can’t cite any statistics, there’s a pretty high correlation between being autistic and being into kink. Obviously, not every person who is not vanilla is autistic, and not every autistic person is into kink…….but there is a high correlation.

For lwj specifically, the things that made me think he might be autistic are his lack of outward emoting combined with his depth and breadth of emotions, how he seems to thrive in and quite enjoy the very structured environment he grew up in, and then the last one off the top of my head (side note, I feel like a week from now I’m going to randomly think of other examples lol) I’m not actually sure IS an example, because I know (thanks to the awesome post from hunxi that you linked to that I had read previously) that his succintness does not equal autism, but I do kind of feel like it is very autistic to Always be so formal and to Always talk in textbook perfect language.

For wwx, I also think he likely has CPTSD! I’m not going to list anything for adhd or cptsd since we both agree on those :) As far as being autistic goes, there is, of course, the high prevalence of adhd/asd comorbidity. For specifc traits- while autism can show up as lack of facial expressions/tone, it can also show up as being overly exuberant and overexpressive. Especially for younger autistic children this can show up as being overly friendly/no boundaries w/ strangers (just?? going home with a random man who says he knew wwx’s parents???), making unusual connections that others do not can be both asd and adhd, his disregard for social status (disregard might be a strong word, and also I feel like this might be one of those things that got lost in translation and if I had read the original text I might have a different opinon, but what I mean here is the way that often autistic people learn certain social rules and try their best to follow them, but often do not pick up on specifics related to social hierarchy that are not spelled out for them- I think jyl’s take down of jin zixun is a great example of the /oppossite/ of what I’m talking about, and is a very neurotypical interaction. An example also of what I mean by disregard for social hierarchy, but from my own life, is how I’ve reflected on past convos w/ my boss only to realize that what I thought was just an interesting conversation about our opinons on a particular subject was actually them trying to tell-me-as-my-boss something they wanted me to do. We ended up doing things the way I wanted to do them because I didn’t realize that they were telling me to do something because they didnt explicitly say so, and because I just don’t pick up on when people are saying something from a social hierarchy pov. Idk if this makes sense or not, so I’m happy to try to expand if you would like me to. I feel like wwx could be described as having alexithymia, which is very common in autistic people, but could also be due to his cptsd. And then, I don’t feel like this is a true point because it is kind of based on headcanon? but wwx feels very demisexual to me, which is much more common for autistic people than it is for allistic people. But him being demi is not canon, just my perception of him (I see him as demisexual gay w/ massive comphet, but I know lots of people see him as bi, which also totally makes sense!!)

Tbh, I’m having a harder time than I thought I would listing wwx specifics. I might go through the book sometime this weekend and see if there are specific moments that pop out at me, but tbh w/ him its more that he Feels very adhd/asd to me?? Idk, I was diagnosed w/ adhd when I was 8, and all 4 of my siblings plus my father have offical adhd diagnoses. I’m 29 now and was only diagnosed as autistic earlier this year.  All of my close friends have always been either adhd, asd, or adhd/asd. There have been multiple people I have met that I’ve suspected were neurodivergent who have later told me they started looking into it and are now seeking formal diagnoses. I mention these things, only to give full context when I say that I have spent a lot of time observing the differences between interacting with neurotypicals and neurodivergents. I mean, obviously, it’s possible that I could just be projecting, but to me, Wwx gives off late-diagnosed/heavy masker autism/adhd combo vibes. Again, maybe I am projecting, but I did try to analyze whether I was or not previously, and determined that since in the past with other favorite characters (who I probably share more similarities in personality with) I did not feel like they were neurodivergent, so I figured that probably I wasn’t? That feels like a very convoluted sentence, but what I mean is that I have not thought that about other characters who have been my fav, so I figured that while I do project in certain areas that this particular area probably wasn’t one of them. Or, to say it in yet another way, since i did not project any of my neurodivergencies on past favorite characters, I figured I probably didn’t start doing so now.

I would love to hear more of your perspective on this, particularly because I worry that I do not have the cultural touchstones to realize when something wwx or lwj is doing is not actually a sign of being neurodivergent. I try my best to research things I don’t know about and to listen to fans who actually do have that cultural understanding, but there’s only so much I can look into on my own when I only speak/read english. And also, I love mdzs and I love talking about both adhd and autism, so I’m glad to talk about these subjects with someone else who also likes all of those topics :) Sorry for sending a book of a response and also I hope you are having a great day!!

wow wow wow anon THANK YOU for doing your research and acknowledging your blind spots you seriously made my day. I wanted to get to this as soon as I made that rant while sharing cyan’s post bc this is specifically an example of a well researched proposition based on actual lived experience and critical thinking.

I almost want to ask you to come forward so we can take this convo elsewhere for a more nuanced discussion bc you’ve already hit upon an issue that’s been holding me back from making a big blathering masterpost on the matter - that the ND experience is so unique and individual, and no one person can dictate someone else’s experience. at the end of the day, if you personally relate to these characters and gain more understanding of yourself and your experiences from them, who am I to take that away from you?

in a public space though I have to make the discussion very broad in order to accurately contextualize these issues, bc in typical autistic fashion I feel morally compelled to Do My Best and Get It Right even as the masses show no inclination of returning the favor, so apologies for the boring backstories I have to get out of the way before we can approach anything resembling new ground.

first from a diagnostic standpoint, while I recognize the traits you listed (and appreciate your clearly nuanced understanding of ND expressions) and would find value in exploring them in a personal context, they are not unique to adhd and/or autism and wouldn’t constitute a basis for diagnosis in a clinical setting. I know that's probably beside the point for this anon, but there's enough edgy teens hoarding labels out there without tacit encouragement from scientists (yes I am technically a scientist, even though my ideologies these days range from conventional to... wildly esoteric, shall we say)

from a cultural standpoint, it’s important for me to emphasize that the concept of neurodivergence is a uniquely western notion. for those unfamiliar, the term 'neurodiversity' was only coined in 1998. I was born in 1991. I existed for a whole 7 years as an autistic person before the idea of being neurodivergent was even a thing. this ND acceptance thing is very, very new - people were not making tiktok confessionals about their adhd diagnosis journeys when I was growing up.

china, like most asian countries, is about 20 years or more behind on just about every social issue compared with western countries. to better illustrate, the experience of being ND in china falls much closer to the conventional experience of disability (i.e. being eugenicized out of existence) than the tentative ND acceptance movement that’s been kickstarted in the past 20 years in the anglosphere.

safe to say, there is no ND coding going on in chinese media. characters are either explicitly ND or they're not. there's no basis for a creator subtly inducing ND-like traits in a character, because there's no such thing as ND awareness in the cultural context of where mdzs was written and consumed. any resemblance is purely accidental, as they say.

as to how this resemblance could exist - I could go into the layers and layers of historical, cultural, social and religious context that make up these characters and the xianxia genre as a whole. for this anon in particular i'm happy to, because they've done the work. please please get in touch in some way where we can have a fully fleshed out chat if you're interested in taking this further, I realize i’ve basically addressed none of the finer points you’ve raised but honestly it’s another level of discussion to be had that cannot be summarized in one blog post haha.

as for those who would scream 'but special interests!!' at a character whose sect was founded by a literal monk - what would be the point?

PS. to comprise a starting point for why it's possible to see ND4ND everywhere in media if you looked hard enough - I refer you to the seminal red oni blue oni trope 💁‍♀️

#neurodivergence #neurodiversity #actuallyautistic #autism #adhd #danmei #mo dao zu shi #the untamed #mdzs #lan wangji #wei wuxian

[happikattwuzheere]

was gonna try and do multiple characters in one post but nope! i have too much to say. also the pictures are all different sizes so its rly hard to get the photoset to look appealing, so we’re starting w/ blue. and also a colored pic of what adam looks like when he’s not a deer. boy’s tryin not to stand out. which goes great up for him right up until it doesn’t. lmao. i’ll talk a bit about him too w/ stuff that didnt get mentioned in the starter post about him and gansey, but this is mostly gonna be about blue. 

SO. 

there’s this fey entity, right? i don’t have a name for them, but they’re not...they didnt START the fey/human conflict, but they are benefiting from it, politically speaking? and when maura was younger, despite other witches being like “girl dont choose sides, we’re witches, we guard boundaries but we don’t choose sides,” was hotheaded and brash and went “ok but fuck that though” and one thing led to another and she ended up getting a curse on her firstborn. Oops. that’s where the kissing curse comes from, here; i’ll get into that much later in a text post probably but gansey’s survivor’s guilt thing doesnt come from him actually dying in this au it’s from something Else, but blue will still kill him if she kisses him, just, for different reasons, it’s an actual curse this time and not something to do with the nature of who they both are. 

her father’s still a tree light, but like, she actually knows that from the outset? because. they live in cabeswater. the tree lights are all around and accept her as one of their own even if she can’t turn into a tree, and as a result of that, she’s got some cool perks. 

a) extremely resistant and/or outright immune to a Lot of fey bullshit 

b) still boosts psychic energies and magical powers like in canon

c) the absolute safest person to be traveling in cabeswater ever, because the forest itself loves her, and also if you mess with her within the borders of cabeswater a bunch of tree lights will physically manifest and be like “hey buddy wanna think twice about that”

but she can’t use magic herself, still, which actually works in the favor of herself and the coven--witchcraft is in a sort of weird spot, culturally, where it’s both feared and often hated, but also understood to at times be necessary, especially by rural peoples like those of the village. im taking a very discworld spin on the witchcraft, because i love discworld and you can’t stop me, and so the attitude is, like. its frightening ancient magic and the church hates it but when there’s an emergency and someone’s on the border between life and death, or something is trying to pass into this world from another, etc etc etc, then you gotta suck it up and call on a witch because they’re the only ones who can deal with those things. so. the coven is tolerated, both because it’s too big and powerful to actually fight but also because it’s extremely needed when you live in a village right next door to fey lands. you NEED someone watching the border. however that doesn’t mean anyone wants to be seen publicly talking to a witch--but blue’s not a witch. she’s a witch’s daughter, but she’s not a witch herself, which is a step removed enough that she can go into town and run errands and also people will maybe pull her discretely aside and tell her if something’s coming up that the coven should know about, and it all works very neatly with her acting as a sort of liaison. very important role she plays, which is why gansey tries talking to her after his initial attempt to speak with the coven directly fails. 

speaking of the coven itself: i’ve been calling it the fox way coven, even tho it probably wouldn’t be called that because there’s no road called fox way that the coven is built on, it’s a big magic house out in the fairy forest, BUT they do have a fox theme because i love foxes and this is a gift i have been given. if people have familiars in this coven, they’re foxes rather than cats, because as wonderful as cats are u cant have them and foxes in the same house that will go bad. but also there’s a v small number of them, like maybe three or four total out of the much higher number of women living there, who are fey blooded like adam, but who become foxes rather than adam’s deer. persephone is one of these! (it’s worth noting the reason why they become the same animal is because of a combination of coincidence, intentional theming, and mostly just because like, virtually all of the residents there aside from persephone are related to either maura or calla) 

anyway the point is, because of this, blue’d seen enough feyblood transformations that when, one day when she was 9 or 10, on a visit to town, she saw the most distressed, disoriented fawn wobbling around frantically and was able to very quickly recognize that that was, in fact, a person who had probably turned into a deer for the first time, and responded by very calmly informing him that she knew who could help and leading him home. this is where those last two pictures come from, and how adam’s apprenticeship started. 

like, there was a lot of arguing from the witches immediately--of course we’re going to teach him how to become human again but we aren’t really going to take him on in the coven are we? he’s a boy, he’s some local kid we know nothing about, what happened to keeping it in the family, he’s the wrong animal and we’ve got a whole thing going on--at which point persephone parted everyone like the red sea, took one look at adam, went “mine now” and despite a lot of grumbling that was the end of it. she took him on a bit of a tour of cabeswater a few days later, after he’d had time to think it over, and he felt so drawn to the forest that he agreed to the apprenticeship.

so he’s technically persephone’s apprentice but like in actual practice he’s being taught by the entire coven lmao, ANYWAY

adam being adam also had a backup plan for trying to get out of the village--even at ten he figured witchcraft might be a first way out of there, he was already thinking about it, but by thirteen when the good ole abuse started (and at which point the last whispers of dissent died out very quickly amongst the coven, nope, adam is one of us now, do you want us to very threateningly hang out in your front yard sometime because we can do that--what do you mean no, let us do this,) he was also like. i dont think this is a guarantee of getting out of here i need a second job. and the thing is, as was mentioned in the original post, the fey blood also means adam’s got issues with iron; it’ll poison him if he’s stabbed with it but it also reacts to his skin touching it like a hot stove. he’s fine if there’s a layer between his skin and the iron, but if he touches it directly, it’s Bad. so ofc this headstrong idiot takes an open spot a t a metalworker’s in the village because adam is the king of making bad decisions. the witches have a betting pool on how long it’ll take him to out himself. “its fine i’ll wear gloves,” he says. “it’s the perfect disguise no one will expect someone with fey connections to work near so much iron,” he says. “i have everything perfectly under control,” he says.

anyway he totally forgets to wear gloves before grabbing an iron tool while his dad and his boss are both in the store and in clear view of him and that’s why he was getting chased by hunters when gansey rescued him 

also he and blue tried dating when they were like 13-14 and it ended about as badly as in canon and they made up later and by the time the story starts they’ve settled into very much being weird siblings. adam starts hanging out with gansey initially to try and basically spy on him, figure out why he’s here, but ends up rly liking the guy and deciding his reasons are sincerely to try and help people, and he tells this to blue who starts immediately accusing him of having a crush on the lordling and being a class traitor, because she does NOT like gansey at this point and really the nobility all prefer wizards to witches which is a stupid idiot decision and frankly the fact that this lordling is apparently enamored by some random deer is hilarious to her, but even moreso is the fact that adam actually defends the lordling to her, like, “wow adam its hilarious that the lordling’s friend thinks that you have charmed the lordling because from my perspective it looks the other way around” “shut uuuup you’re not listening im serious, like, yeah ok he put his foot in his mouth really hard when he talked to you but im telling you i dont think the whole i-wanna-understand thing is an act” “idk if i can trust you through those rose tinted glasses buddy. tell me again about that time he called you princely?” “oh my god” 

this is turning into rambling but. thats the gist of the witches and blue esp thank u for coming if u made it this far here’s a bonus persephone fox 

#trc #the raven cycle #blue sargent #deer boy au #longpost #VERY long im so sorry.

[7wanderingpaws]

Simply, yours (12)

Pairing: Baekhyun x reader

Genre: family AU, hapkido teacher AU, PhD AU

Word count: 3.5K

Warnings: mentions of death, cursing

A/N: a moodboard! Yay! Finally some face to the story ^^ in my head baek looks like on the pics in this one hihi. Couple of more interesting things will happen! Aaaand this series will finish by 15th chapter. Or less. I will see how much time I will have. :( Anyway, thank you all sososososooo much for the support and comments, it means THE WORLD! ❤

tags:  @milky-baek @itsbaekhyunsbutt @luvhtears @shesdreaminginoverdose @cynthbee @jummyjammy @junmyeonnoona @littleflowercrown13 @sebootyforlife​ (if you want to be tagged/untagged please let me know!)

MASTERLIST

1 . 2 . 3 . 4 . 5 . 6 . 7 . 8 . 9 . 10 . 11 . 12

Baekhyun was stressed. That much you could tell.

The competition between the universities was in couple of days and he-

“Chanyeol, I can't hang out! I still didn't hand in my paper on the sports psychology thing and I have to head to uni in a couple for the training!”

You were in the kitchen, trying to bake some muffins since you were craving like a mad man, and you could hear him pacing around the bedroom where he bunked the whole day to finish off the mentioned paper. He had been a bit distant since the past three-four days, and you gave him his space, knowing he wasn't taking any silly things from anyone right now. He was full on focused and, well, quite biting to whomever tried to help.

He sighed again. “Listen, I know we still have time to hand it in, but I am so busy with the university team that I need to finish it earlier. Fuck, the assistant master is also breathing on my neck. You need to understa-”

He went quiet when Chanyeol interrupted him, and you silently continued separating the dough to the empty holes on the baking pan.

It had now been two weeks since the Korean New Year and another check-up at the clinic, after which you started to attend pilates classes for the expecting women. You had classes two times per week in the evening hours and one of them clashed with Baekhyun's hapkido class at the university, so you weren't accompanying him that often anymore, which was also a small relief for you. As much as your presence there didn't change matters, you felt like a bothersome girlfriend that needed to keep an eye on him, which was not true. Let alone Jiyoung, although had not necessarily done anything, still made you uneasy with her straight-forward behaviour with Baekhyun. You trusted him, though. After the Korean New Year, you got rid of the whole jealousy nonsense and focused solely on yourself and your own peace of mind. After all, it was literally a matter of a few months and your life would become loud, tiring and just overall turnt upside down.

“And you know I've got other stuff to get taken care of.” Silence. “You know what I'm talking about.” You giggled to yourself, liking how Baekhyun was losing his cool with his best friend, not paying attention to the meaning of his words.

You placed the baking pan in the oven and set up the temperature and timer, finally standing up properly, and hissing at the pain in your lower back. 

These days, whenever you looked in the mirror at your tummy and the dark stretch marks, you couldn't help but wonder how was this humanly possible; to bear three kids in your own body, in that little place under your heart. It blew your mind, and usually you would end up talking about this with Baekhyun just before sleeping when the lights were out and you were curled up at his side.

“Just proves how fucking amazing you are, my love,” he would murmur in your ear.

You smiled to yourself, your heart fluttering at the recollection and you sat down, checking your phone. A new customer who was buying your knitted clothings, was supposed to come by any minute now, so you might as well rest till she arrived, and let Baekhyun deal with his own issues.

You found a message from the lady waiting for you, so you opened it quickly, thinking she might have cancelled on you.

Hello! I was supposed to pick up the ordered knits today, but I can't make it unfortunately, so my husband will come at the promised time instead! Thank you!

Okay, at least she didn't cancel. You didn't care who would come for them as long as they were taken and paid for.

“Okay, Chanyeol, I will meet you tomorrow,” Baekhyun finally ended the call after more discussion and then you heard another heavy sigh. It caused pain for you too, knowing you couldn't help and you also didn't have a constant, stable pay so that you could ease it up for him just a little bit. Great at uselessne- no. You wouldn't allow yourself those thoughts anymore.

“Babe, you good?” you shouted.

“Yeah.”

“Doesn't sound very convincing,” you muttered to yourself, just when the doorbell rang. You struggled up to your feet and headed for the intercom, letting the person in.

“That's the customer, right?” asked Baekhyun from the bedroom.

You made your way to the door, the little bag with necessary clothes prepared, as you shouted back a yes before sliding the door open and waiting for the person to leave the elevator.

You were excited to earn money like this, even if it was just a little bit. You could shop groceries with it and Korea did have expensive fruit and veggies, unfortunately, so this came extremely handy to you.

Quickly shooting a look behind you, you double-checked if everything looked decent and clean in the apartment before turning back just to get the biggest shock.

Without even thinking, you had the urge to slam the door shut in his face before he could properly orient himself on the new floor of apartments, but you didn't do it. Instead, you ran your tongue over your teeth, preparing for a painful smile.

He turned and he spotted you - he just looked at your stomach - standing in the doorway, ready to walk to you resolutely before he actually brought his eyes up to yours. And he momentarily froze, stopping on the spot.

Silence overtook the cold corridor, and you felt the stress creeping up in your stomach, except you had nothing to fear this time. It was him who wanted something. And Baekhyun was right in the apartment in case anything happened.

“I believe you came to pick up the knits?” Your voice was almost foreign to you, it was strained so much.

His eyes fell lower, seeing just how pregnant you were; your body a far cry from when he last saw you. Clearing his throat, he replied: “Yes, I am.”

Slowly, he walked over and you pushed your hand with the bag out for him to take, wanting him to just leave. “Here. That will be 120.000 won, please.”

Your ex-boss stared at you, not taking the bag for a couple of heartbeats. He monitored your face before his eyes looked behind you at the humble apartment. Only after that, he took it while with his other hand he reached behind taking out his wallet probably from the pockets of his trousers. “Yes, I have the exact amount.”

“Good.”

He snapped his eyes back to you, as he took out the necessary cash before handing it to you. “How are you?”

Oh, dear lord. Not the small talk, please.

“I mean, are you doing well and healthy?”

You stared at him, hoping the negative emotions didn't mirror in your eyes too much, as you didnt want to become someone like him. “I'm fine and healthy, thank you for asking.”

“That's a relief.”

Suppressing a scoff, you were about to put an end to this fruitless conversation when you heard shuffling from behind, and Baekhyun's voice. “Is everything alright?” And he appeared.

He walked to your side, shock evident on his face. “You?”

You felt a protective hand around your waist, your boyfriend pushing you further inside the house, not liking an inch your evil boss being near your vicinity.

Your boss, Mr Kim, gave him a tight lipped smile. “Hello, Mr Byun. My wife is the one buying the knits from your wif- girlfriend.”

“Really?”

You nodded. “She wrote me just a couple of minutes ago that her husband would pick them up instead of her,” you explained to Baekhyun, who didn't even look at you, his strict gaze focused on your boss, “and it turns out to be Mr Kim. There are too many Kims in this country, for sure.”

“Well, we hope your wife will enjoy them,” said Baekhyun coldly. “Have a good evening.”

He was about to push both of you back inside to close the door, but your boss surprised you. Again. “I just wanted to… wish you all the best. I hope you will continue having a safe pregnancy and birth.”

You frowned, but nodded nonetheless. “Thank you.”

“And… I apologise.”

Baekhyun's grip on you tightened. “For what exactly?”

Mr Kim looked in your eyes as he seemed to think over his words. “I was acting unprofessional and it was not acceptable. Me sacking you due to your state was not justifiable, and I realize that I probably created even bigger financial difficulties for you. You always mentioned how money comes in handy and yet…” he shook his head, scrunching his eyebrows, “it was all a terrible mistake. I was insensitive. I apologise.”

You took in a shaky breath, your palms sweaty with anxiety as you let his words properly sink in. He actually uttered those words. Those apologetic words. The words you never imagined he would say, because you believed he was incapable of feeling anything close to regret and sorrow.

Sensing your hesitation, Baekhyun spoke up. “I think it's too late for that. But thank you. I bet my girlfriend appreciates your realizations.”

“Why suddenly?” You asked before Baekhyun could push you further inside the apartment. “I worked so hard for you. I always tried to please you yet I received hate.”

Something flashed in his eyes, something you couldn’t quite name. Was it hurt? Was it sorrow? Pain? “I don’t expect you to forgive me. I was ruthless, but just know that I am sorry.” He looked at Baekhyun now. “I deserved the punch.” With a sad smile, he raised and dangled the bag in front of him as he took a step back. “I’m sure my grandchildren will love this. And my wife too. All the best,” he said and turned around, not letting you and Baekhyun speak.

And you wouldn’t even be able to, because Baekhyun closed the door right after muttering: “Get home safely.”

“What was that?” You asked, shell-shocked at the sudden turn of events. “Did this really happen?”

You were still squeezing the bank notes in your sweaty palms and you moved to put them on the dining table, Baekhyun hot on your heels. “He is crazy. One moment he is shouting at you, calling you all kinds of things and the next he is sorry and acts like…whatever” he trailed off, in the heat of a moment unable to think of a proper word.

You shot him a look, amused. “I know. But at least he realized his mistake.”

Baekhyun pursed his lips, not fully convinced with your words but eventually he murmured: “At least if some other employee gets pregnant he won’t throw her out.”

You smiled, satisfied with his way of thinking. “Exactly.”

“And you earned yourself some money,” he reciprocated the smile and he came to you to give you a kiss on the cheek. “Well done.”

“I’ve been earning money through this for some time now,” you reminded him.

“I know but it’s his money.”

“Oh.”

“Exactly.”

-

Once the muffins were out of the oven, you decided to call Sukyeong. Baekhyun retrieved to your shared bedroom to continue his studying. He needed the peace anyway, and you really wanted to chat to your good friend because you had way too many thoughts and questions about your ex-boss’s well being. The way he acted was so unlike him.

Sukyeong thankfully picked up after the third ring and she squealed into the phone upon seeing your name. “Finally! I thought you would never call! We saw each other two weeks ago, don't tell me you got suddenly busy!”

You let out a breathy laugh. “No, I became lazy and almost immobile by now, thank you for the concerns.”

“I think I will have to drop by more often,” she thought out loud. “Besides, I also want to talk about something!”

“Eh? What is it?”

“Nah, this needs to be told face to face.”

Since your topic seemed to be just a little bit more intriguing than Sukyeong’s secretiveness, you decided to go with it and spill the beans. You quickly explained to her what just happened, feeling more encouraged by her gasps.

“Well, there is something that happened actually,” she said after a bit of silence. After you left your job, you and Sukyeong rarely ever talked about the workplace, Sukyeong only complaining about the workload and whatnot. She was such a kind-hearted, considerate friend to you; she knew by default the last person you want to talk about was your screwed up boss. “I just didn't know if I should tell you or not, since it doesn't really include you anymore and also…” she trailed off, “it might scare you.”

You frowned, fingering the little whole in the pillow you were hugging to yourself. “Scare me? What are you talking about?” you let out a doubtful laugh.

Sukyeon sighed and you imagined her playing with her fringe to ease up the nerves. “You know his son is married, right?”

“Mhm.” You rarely paid attention to your boss's private life but you were aware of that fact.

“So, anyway, Mr Kim's daughter-in-law was pregnant and she was supposed to give birth just one month after you left,” she continued on, her words still not bearing an ounce of confidence.

You interrupted her, though. “Oh, really? So why didn't he fire his daughter-in-law, huh?! How dare she be pregnant?! God, that man is ridiculous, I swear. Poor daughter-in-law! How difficult it must be for her to live with him!”

“Erm,” Sukyeong gently called out your name, trying to get your attention, which she did but you wished she didn't as her next words gave you the nausea you had been dreading to have your entire pregnancy. “She died giving birth.”

You went completely silent at that, your mind empty and busy all at the same time. His daughter-in-law died giving birth to his grandchild. She died. Giving birth. “How did that happen?” you breathed out.

“Complications during birth. Unexpected high blood pressure, high sugar levels and many other factors,” she replied, her voice sad.

“Jesus,” you breathed out again, “I had no clue.”

“You couldn't have known, dear.”

Tears burned in your eyes at the thought of how tragic the whole story is. So this was why he was apologetic. “But still… I'm so sorry. To her, and even to him - Mr Kim.”

Sukyeong heaved out a heavy sigh. “Don't cry, I cannot comfort you over the phone like this. You wouldn't know!”

“What if I will die?”

“You won't,” she snapped right away. “You are a healthy woman.”

“You know my blood-pressure is also dangerously high at times.”

“But that doesn't change the fact that you are healthy. You don't have problems with your sugar levels, nor is your entire pregnancy problematic.” She paused, before she continued. “Listen, this is why I was reluctant to tell you. I didn't want to trigger any fear in you. Just don't think about it.”

You felt your chin quiver, but you pushed it down. Sukyeong was right. Plus, Baekhyun really didn't need this kind of stress when he already had too much on his plate right now. Having to suck it up and be brave for your own self for once was something you should have started doing a while ago. You always knew pregnancy was a risk. But you wanted to show everyone that not having enough money and still bearing three healthy babies and eventually giving them birth was something more valuable than any monetary aspect of this world.

“You are right, Sukyeonga. I won't. But you owe me a hot chocolate.”

-

It was around 1am. You were lying on your side, naked back facing Baekhyun as he absentmindedly traced his fingertips over the imprints on your back, left there by your bra. He was shuffling around more, until he resolved to skinship in hopes to ease his mind.

“What's on your mind?” you asked quietly out of nowhere, startling him for a second. He thought you would be asleep by now.

You turned around to your other side, curling up against his chest and he gladly opened his arms for you, missing your presence. It was common that you two would naturally shift apart during the night, both of you deep in sleep, but because of your pregnancy you also felt many times boiling hot which resulted in you scooting as far away from his body heat as the mattress allowed. This time though, the night was exceptionally cold and you knew he needed you.

“Baby, you should be resting,” he rasped quietly.

You held his cheek gently, looking up at him, although he couldn't see you properly in the darkness. “There is something bothering my man,” you whispered, “and I can't sleep when I know you are this troubled.”

He sighed, and you could feel the heaviness of it, the worries somehow too difficult to bear. “It's just a lot on my plate,” he admitted, though very reluctantly. “I want our team to win or at least make it very far but I'm worried I am asking for too much.” His hand was caressing your back, enjoying the hot skin covering it.

“What makes you think that?”

He went silent, contemplating your question and his answer to it. The truth was, Baekhyun's head was very chaotic which rarely happened. Him, who always had a goal clearly set in his mind, never got this worried. “I don't even know. It's the PhD stuff together with this Universiad competition… both require my full attention and even though I am doing my best, I feel like I could still do better.”

It meant a lot that he was this outspoken. He shared his daily issues with you, however only the heavy ones he would let pile up and mull over them until he couldn't bear it anymore.

“My perfectionist boy,” you cooed. “Everything is created in your mind, darling. Everything is still the same as before - you are a student and as your side job you teach kids. Your team was always doing well and that's why you got this opportunity. In fact, you don't need to change anything. You have addition of Jiyoung and her team, that's true, but that still doesn't change the fact that what you did until now is enough. It is all valuable. You're not asking for too much, Baekhyun.”

A couple of heartbeats later you heard him sigh again as he squeezed your body to his, your tummy pressing to his side. “Thank you,” he murmured into your hair.

“Don't keep it in. I know it's difficult. I know, honey.”

“I just want to do well, you know? Do well in my professional life. And I want to do everything in my power to make you and our kids live comfortably.”

You felt stinging behind your eyes, touched and overwhelmed with emotions. “You are doing more than enough, Baekhyun. I'm comfortable and happy because I have you. Out of our entire village, you are the superstar. You are the one who made it. Don't doubt yourself for one second, because I will love you no matter what. You are doing already more than enough, so relax.”

He chuckled lowly. “What would I do without you, hm?” he whispered and he moved to bury his face in your neck, slowly kissing down to your chest where he rested his head under your collarbones. His arm around you was now caressing the bump, his thumb running over the stretched out belly. “Thank you, sweetheart.”

“Don't thank me.That's what I'm here for. For you. In good and in bad,” you replied as you played with his messy hair.

“Already doing the wedding vows?”

You grew hot, the sudden images of a wedding ceremony with Baekhyun warming your heart. “Not yet.”

He hummed. “But soon.”

“After the kids are born.”

“Where do you want to leave them for our honeymoon? They would be always tied to your boobs. That way I can't have them just for myself.”

That made you laugh out loud, and you pulled on his hair gently, making him chuckle. He raised his head and you felt his breath on your smiling lips. “Then you better enjoy them until you can.”

He kissed you slowly, languidly, humming in the process while dragging his hand over your bump and chest until he was cupping your cheek. “I should, huh,” he murmured into your open mouth. “Though I beg for priority. I was the first to claim them.”

You laughed again and Baekhyun felt extremely satisfied, his worries settled for now. He brought you in for another sensual kiss until both of your eyes were droopy enough to pull to sleep.

#baekhyun fanfiction #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun au #baekhyun scenario #exo fanfiction #exo fluff #exo smut #mywritings

[cassyapper]

loving you may mean losing you but i dont mind (jotakak playlist)

dont talk to me about the title of this thing im embarrassed enough

anyway but okay so!!!! very excited to share this!!!! this has been in the works since september but my picky ass finally found an adequate amount of songs so here it is!!!!!! my jotakak playlist (:

special thanks to my lovely and wonderful friend jade for helping me finish this this thing <3

track list nd why i picked the songs that i did under the break!

1. the predatory wasp of the palisades is out to get us! by sufjan stevens i chose this song because it’s all about internalized homophobia and being in love with your best friend as a kid which RLLY resonates w jotakak imo. esp cause in the song, stevens’ friend ends up leaving abruptly, leaving stevens to wonder about what couldve blossomed if they had stuck together and worked through the difficulties together, which JOTARO....THAT IS JOTARO-CORE esp cause kak also “leaves” (dies). so this song was a v obvious choice for me and in fact this song is what inspired me to create this playlist in the first place

2. we are beautiful, we are doomed by los campesinos! this song is abt being in love with someone but you both have ur issues so it’s kind of a mess. considering jotaro and kakyoin’s (to point it quite frankly) trauma and the fact that both of them do jack shit to try and cope with it healthily, this song DEFINITELY fits them. esp cause this song mentions physical fighting and the imagery that goes with it (”he got his teeth fixed/im gonna break them”, “i’ve got a fist on fire”, etc) and the entirety of the bridge/last verse rlly gives me these two’s vibes so! ya (:

3. love love love by of monsters and men this song is the singer feeling like shes completely unworthy of being loved by this important person in her life, particularly because she has NO idea how to show affection and love the (for lack of better word) “acceptable” way, or any way at all really. this REALLY has jotaro vibes cause he is one repressed motherfucker and as we see the entirety of his story, jotaro is full of love he loves so much it’s just he has no idea how to properly express it cause he’s scared essentially. but that didn’t stop people from loving him, in this case, that being kakyoin. hhhhHHh

4. ribs by lorde this song is about being scared of growing up but due to the lyrics being written the way they are, i kinda spin the interpretation of it to be the fear jotaro and kakyoin had on the crusade to egypt, as they were the youngest and didnt know if they’d make it back and everything is just incredibly overwhelming there is so much going on all the time those 50 days. i can do a full analysis on why but that would be kinda long LMAO. for now let’s leave it at they have a very Unique fear of growing up but it still fits with the lyrics. particularly the last bit of the song with the “youre the only friend i need” verses,,,makes me think of these two...

5. can i call you tonight? by dayglow i interpret this song to be about trying to figure out what, exactly, your feelings are for this very specific and important person in your life. since jotaro and kakyoin r both repressed and also suckers of internalized homophobia, i think they fit that theme very well. particularly with the whole “i feel like we’re close, but maybe we’re not actually? what are we?” theme going on in the lyrics, this whole song makes me think of jotaro and kakyoin figuring out their intense and sudden (cause again only 50 days but also, those 50 days had So Much going on) feelings for each other. also the “now i’m no longer alone” line in the chorus HHHHHHH that’s them

6. la la la love song by toshinobu kubota ft naomi campbell SO I KNOW THIS SONG IS KINDA JUST FLUFF but we need some light-hearted moments in this thing hjgg;. ALSO toshinobu kubota is canonically jotaro’s favorite musician so i wanted to reference that and this was my fav love song of his that i’ve found so far so (: also the “you are my shining star” line,,,heh

7. truce by twenty one pilots so this song is very soft. it’s about tending to wounds and taking a moment before continuing to push on. it makes me think abt jotaro and kakyoin taking care of each other on the journey (for example the lovers arc/n’doul fight). also the whole “stay alive, stay alive for me/you will die, but now your life is free/take pride in what is sure to die” makes me go fucking nuts that is. that fits these two to a T fuck

8. this side of paradise by coyote theory this song has big “two lonely people are in love with each other for the first time” vibes and OHHHHHHHHHH THAT’S JOTAKAK.... there are a lot of little lines that make me specifically think abt these two, such as “love so strong it makes me feel weak” (jotaro-core...), “if you’re lonely come be lonely with me”, “i’ll be yours if you’ll be mine” (wanting some security while ur in love for the first time is common but especially for these two i think it works spectacularly) but yea this song as a whole is just...ohhh them. theyre in lvoe HK;FNJFL

9. i saw you in a dream by the japanese house EVERY. SINGLE. LINE. OF THIS SONG IS POST-EGYPT JOTARO. EVERY SINGLE LINE. and the ghost the singer talks about seeing? they hadnt changed at all? they were such a pretty vision, a perfect hallucination? BRUH... just listen i could do a whole analysis on this song it all just fits jotaro mourning kakyoin throughout the years so so so so well it makes me feel nuts holy shit i just. literally every line. every line fits i am not joking. i cried when i first heard this song LMAO

10. video games by the young professionals SO LMAO obviously kakyoin’s epic gamer moves are being referenced but beyond that i interpret this song to just be the fun parts of being in love esp when ur young (backed up with the “kissing in the blue dark” and the “watching all our friends fall” lines). also the chorus just makes me want to cry cause just, happy jotakak moments PLEASE. “the world was built for two only worth living if somebody is loving you, and baby now you do” THEYRE NOT ALONE ANYMORE THEY FOUDN EACH OTHER IM GONAN WAILLLLLLL oh my god. im nuts theynkjNJKNJF also “i heard that you like the bad girls” please. these two shitty teenagers

11. ikanaide by sohta ft. yuki kaai this song is abt not wanting someone u love to leave u cause youll miss them obviously but also ur scared of how the time will change you and if it’ll make you unrecognizable eventually. big post-egypt jotaro vibes 😔 especially cause one part of the chorus translates to “i shouldnt cry, i shouldnt cry, but the truth is i want to say dont go” and im jus like OHHHHH NO IT’S JOTARO FINDING OUT KAKYOIN DIED jkfnNKJFNJDhkld

12. therefore you and me by eve ALRIGHT. god this song is one hell of a doozy. i interpret this song to mean being sincerely in love but youre in the wrong place/wrong time. considering the uh Whole Situation in part 3 there were definitely better times to fall in love for these two. jotaro and kakyoin try to be happy w the moments they do have (i think the second verse in particular adds to this sentiment what with the selfish ghosts part) but they want a better environment understandably so theyre also just kinda ignoring things until they can properly care for a relationship. but well...who knows if theyll live to make it to that better environment ):

13. mayonaka no door/stay with me by miki matsubara this song is a v sweet sentiment abt like “it’s not just heat of the moment!! i do care about u a lot!!” and asking the person u have feelings for to stick around. big kakyoin and jotaro vibes as it would be easy to call what they have a fling considering how relatively short of a timeframe they had but i genuinely think their relationship was deeper than just that and this song nicely reflects such. “jotaro and i will share a room cause we’re both students” fuckin head ass

14. a thousand years by sting oh sting.... so since sting is kakyoin’s favorite musician canonically i had to add one of his songs here as well but beyond just that i do think this song fits them!! it kinda gives me big “if not in this life, then the next” vibes which is a big uhhh thing for jotakak. they may be doomed to tragedy but the moments they have together make the tragedy worth enduring ironically i feel like this song is mostly from jotaro’s pov considering i dont think he ever completely got over kakyoin and this song def has that kinda sentiment but hey it fits them...

15. mr loverman by ricky montgomery SO FUNNY STORY i actually REALLY. REALLY didnt wanna add this song at first cause i felt it wouldve been...idk too cliche? i guess? and i was ALL kinds of picky when choosing songs for this playlist HOWEVER. eventually i relistened to it and read the lyrics while thinking specifically abt jotakak and it actually rlly does fit quite well KJDFN; another jotaro mourning song ): it’s not just the chorus tho the whole song fits jotaro immediately post-egypt but also i feel like some time around part 4 this sentiment would come back to him cause Yknow. Gays In Morioh and the mess of his family life back in america. it just aches for him cause while he’s happy josuke is happy he wishes he couldve had that for him and kakyoin too but yea jus ... them

16. you by petit biscuit an instrumental?? in a ship playlist?? yes that’s right much like mr loverman i was hesitant to put this song in cause it’s harder to justify since i dont rlly know much abt music (and not to b controversial but interpreting lyrics and interpreting music r two different things) however i really think the vibes of this song fit jotakak. it’s got a somber melody but the keys of the piano are high which im taking to mean “light in the dark” which. jotaro and kakyoin (along w the rest of the crusaders) were each other’s lights in the dark. also the ending samples a conference/lecture talking about space flight and like. star platinum. space symbolism. jotaro. yeah

17. saturn by sleeping at last MMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM. this song is all about losing someone very close and important to you, but reflecting on the good they brought into your life rather than the pain of losing them. this song also has HEAVY space imagery which stardust crusaders is absolutely chalk fucking full of so also it’s a very philosophical song and considering that jotaro and kakyoin are both Nerds and both got a nice view of the stars/space in the desert with each other, im sure they had conversations similar to the one highlighted in the song. i think it’s a good note to end the playlist on cause kakyoin is dead and jotaro is the survivor but it’s not a mourning song so much as jotaro taking the love he had for kakyoin and pushing forward with it allll th way into part 6

but yeah that’s the tracklist! i might add or take away a song or two but this is mostly it (: hope yall enjoy!

#cass cries #cass creates #jotaro kujo #kakyoin noriaki #jojos bizarre adventure #jjba #jojo #stardust crusaders #noriaki kakyoin #kujo jotaro #tenmei kakyoin #kakyoin tenmei #kakyoin #jotaro #jotakak #jokak #playlist #jotakak playlist #jokak playlist #jojo playlist #jjba playlist #jojos bizarre adventure playlist #sdc

[rigelmejo]

Dude I was on the language learning forms as I do sometimes, and someone was lamenting the lack of Chinese content to immerse in (watch, read etc). And how it was hard to find and they didn’t have this problem with Japanese what should they do?

Well. 1. I get their frustration on one level, as I do think Japanese content is so much more mainstream to watch in English speaking countries (at least anime and Japanese video games), that trying to find content in a language where it’s harder to just find content right on Netflix or from a friends recommendation does bring up a new challenge. Whereas with Japanese, probably you could accidentally stumble onto it or have a friend recommend you something, then at least explore deeper with some idea of what you liked/where to start finding it.

However. The person also sort of thought the lack of content was due to Chinese just not having as much content or as interesting content. Again I’m going to assume their key issue was just - it can be a new challenge finding media if you have a harder time just starting.

Because lol?? Chinese has SO much content. Like as far as language content on the internet alone??? Chinese has been eons easier to find than Japanese for me, and in terms of sites I actually use regularly is much closer to my experience of English online (there’s so much Chinese content online... so much... an incredible amount... like in chinese I’ve even found free movie watching sites FOR shows in English - like the way I find sites in English to watch Chinese shows IN chinese lol! Like you can use English to search for Chinese stuff, and literally do the reverse to find English stuff, there is so much Chinese stuff... I found more stuff in Japanese using bilibili in chinese than I could find of Japanese using YouTube In English). And Chinese drama land is HUGE it feels as active as American television, so you have endless genres to dive into and companies and actors and writers etc (there is a distinct lack of sci fi though as far as I’ve seen, but to be fair america isn’t making a Ton of sci fi compared to like Detective shows either - it’s just English speaking sci fi has had some more good ones in recent years). There is no lack of Chinese content out there. There’s audiobooks, dramas, audio dramas, talk shows, radio, fanfiction, novels, fanart, manhua, sites to find other stuff, forums, weibo, search sites, just a lot?? Like, if you think Japanese has enough internet content then there is an adequate amount of Chinese content on the internet too lol. You just may have to do a touch more initial exploration.

I just. Thought the assumption “can’t find media means their media sucks” was funny. Because also? I have not found that to be true. I know very little about Thai media. I just happened upon SOTUS cause of a friend talking about it. So like someone watching anime conveniently - I got into it. It was good, so I dug, and found a lot of amazing Thai shows (and some I didn’t love cause lol genres all have a mix of quality depending on show etc). There IS a ton of amazing Thai shows that exist right now. But if all you ever found was SOTUS? While it was great when I saw it to me, once I found more I realized there was a LOT better stuff. So like if you see one cdrama on Netflix (if that’s how you first easily find the media), that does not mean all shows will be that quality or anything like them! And just cause it’s the first one you found doesn’t mean they’re all like that ones quality.

Like I had a similar experience with jdramas growing up, so I get it. I was into anime, saw some (trainwreck) live action adaptations. And as a teenage just blanket assumed all Japanese live action media was gonna be around that quality. And then in recent years, I checked out some Japanese live action media - to see if new stuff was better. YEAH IT SURE IS (and I would imagine some old stuff was great I just gave up after one not-wonderful one lol). SO MANY AMAZING jdramas exist now! Even the ones I most feared would not be great - live action adaptations of anime’s? They’re so much better now, some of them are genuinely loved in their own right as standalone live actions. So like. One not-great show experience is NOT representative of the entire plethora of shows available and their quality. Now that I’ve realized how MANY good jdramas I missed out on? I have so much catching up to do ToT

2. If you’re in this boat of “content seems hard to find, so I feel like there’s none or no good stuff” what to do?

First ask some friends for recommendations?

Check Netflix, Amazon, YouTube (YouTube has a ton of cdramas), Viki, iQiyi app. Like how some people get into anime, maybe you just need an easy conviennent show in your recommended to get into more content.

Check out rec channels on YouTube like Donghua Reviews and Avenue X to hear about some shows and figure out the kinds of ones you’d even want to check out (I imagine other languages also have review channels like for kdramas).

Go to MyDramaList.com. Search genres you like, read recommendation list posts. if you’ve seen a show at this point already you can look it up and see in the “Recommended” section what other dramas are like it, you can see it’s genre tags to see WHAT genres you even seem to like. Use this to start DIGGING and finding stuff you might really like. Since like with anime, you’re only going to find the most popular stuff at first just based on Netflix or friends (which might not match up to your personal tastes as well as finding stuff that Is more your favorite genres).

Try out new stuff. And if it sucks, you don’t like it? Drop it, learn that about yourself, start another new thing. You’ll figure out what you like and dislike pretty fast (like I personally hate bad pacing or bad writing specifically characterization, and I can notice when the specific things I love are gonna be in a show pretty fast).

Check out genres specific to that language’s media. Because if it’s new to you, you might not know if you even like it or not, and if you like it then which things you personally prefer in it (since even within a genre there will be wildly different content and feels). For Chinese this might be wuxia, xianxia, palace dramas, costume dramas, republican era dramas, tomb raiding dramas etc.

*That’s how it worked for me, SOTUS led me to the bl drama fans, eventually they recommended Guardian so bam I guess I was learning chinese, YouTube recced me more cdramas from there to continue with, and mydramalist.com helped me find other shows with actors I liked from guardian (and other bl related shows which led me to Go Princess Go of all things for the bi lead), and that site helped me find more genres and shows I’d like, as well as friends continuing to rec things. Didn’t take long to figure out what I liked, didn’t, and to start noticing what upcoming stuff I’d probably be excited for. And now there’s so much good stuff found I don’t have enough time lol.

As for non show media: use shows as the jump off point. Just like using “easy to find shows” can be used to break into finding more shows. Once you have a show you liked a lot - look up it it’s based on a book, if it has an audiobook, an audio drama, a manhua, a donghua. Chances are it DOES have some of this stuff, because cdramas do a PRETTY regular amount of the time. Often cdramas have all or nearly all of these other story types. So jump into those, then find more novels or audio drama or manhua etc by branching off from the one you liked to others like it. Novelupdates.com is good for doing this with novels (it has a recommendations section), I imagine manhua sites have rec lists too, ximalaya starts recommending stuff once you’ve listened to a few audio on it, etc. And if you get into fandoms of those x media types, those fans will start recommending more too. And again, even if you just stick to media related to shows you liked - so often shows have so MUCH related media that would definitely keep you busy. (Like I didnt wade into non-show connected novels until I looked up more novels as recommendations afte show-related novels, like MDZS and Guardian leading me to SVSSS and 2ha and Can Ci Pin which at the time had no show adaptations, and then eventually found just-novel rec lists - which is still the main way I find fanfic).

#rant #June #discussion #I just. I both get why they were frustrated #but also lol it is a bit funny to me to read that #someone thought chinese has very little media and it sucks #because??? lol Chinese internet has been the most similar for me in terms of comparison to English internet #just because there’s SO much it’s like as big as my English shows to wafch/books to read lists god #there is no shortage of media #and also?? seeing the few easy to find cdramas or donghua #doesn’t mean they’re all the same quality? #that’s like finding family guy and thinking all American cartoons can only be like that #not realizing Spider-Man Into the Spiderverse or Xmen Evolition or Rugrats or Danny Phantom or Avatar exist #like?? just look more lol

[lovebug5151]

Family Bonding (With a hint of Angst) Robodad Grian Au

(Yes, unless y'all have better ideas for the name of this Au, this is what i’m going with lmao. If you do have any, go ahead and say em! If i like it and it fits, ill rename it and say it was your idea in the next chapter.)

So this is about 2040 words, and i’m quite happy with it. I don’t think I made this one as sad as the first one, but im not sure. I actually have a story line for up to ch 5 of this story, and I hope that this is one of the last true sad chapters (Though I might spice some things up, dont want things too happy, do ya :D

This is also about a week or so after the events of the first chapter.

Grian sat on top of his mansion, just watching and listening to the wind, breathing in, and out. He needed to clear his head. Earlier Mumbo had made a offhand comment about how Grumbots heart was missing, and ‘maybe it fell into the ocean’ before laughing. 

While Grian knew Mumbo didn’t have the same background as he did with considering Aware AI’s ‘just robots’, he had called Grumbot son, even if it was awkwardly. It hurt Grian, to know that Mumbo might hurt Grumbot, even unintentionally, if he did see him. And Jrumbot… he was just a child, his dad saying hurtful things would hurt him so much more.

Grian had to quickly finish up what he was doing, and rush back to his base to breath. He couldn’t work beside Mumbo at the moment, couldn’t explain how Mumbo had hurt him, and so had run off. 

Grian leaned forward slightly to look down. It was a far drop. Grian had never truly been afraid of heights, he loved climbing high in the air. 

It was joked that it was because he was short, that he liked to be tall, but he just liked feeling the wind rush around him, and the feeling of falling and pulling up right before hitting the ground. It was elating, and whenever he was feeling bad he just took a leap off a roof and fell, before swooping up using his elytra. 

He wondered if Grumbot would like flying, he could fix up some Jet boots for him, maybe mechanical wings? Yeah, he’ll make some wings for Grumbot and if he liked them, maybe some for himself. He liked the idea of being able to mostly hover in one place. 

He let out a breath and looked at the sun. It was nearing lunch, and if he didn’t come inside Grumbot would come looking for him. 

Grian swooped down, landing in front of the door, before heading inside. 

--------

Grumbot hummed as he finished cooking some steak. He and Jrumbot were able to eat regular food, and no one knew how, but neither Grumbot or Grian really wanted to question it so they let it be.

He put the steak on plates and turned around just as his Dad walked in. He smiled and said hi to him while bringing the plates to the table. Jrumbot was already there and they sat on chairs to eat.

It was quiet for a moment before Grian yawned. “Have you two ever wanted to fly?” 

Grumbot looked at him weirdly for a second before nodding. “Yeah, kinda, but I'm way too heavy for an elytra.”

Jrumbot paused with his steak halfway in his mouth

“If fould fe fun fu fly” He said, still chewing his food. 

Grian sighed slightly and smiled at Jrumbot 

“Jrumbot, dont talk with your mouth full.”

Jrumbot finished his mouthful and squirmed slightly. “Sorry.”

“|Its alright. Its just something to that we dont make a mess okay?” Grian told him.

“Okay.” Jrumbot muttered, before continuing “But yeah! It would be so fun to fly!”

Grian smiled “I have an idea then, but let's finish eating, yeah?” Both of them nodded at him before starting to eat their steak again.

After dinner, Jrumbot went to go mess with some of the blocks Grian had given him, and Grian and Grumbot went down to the Lab. They called it a Lab, but it was just a basement with too many tech pieces in it.

Grumbot sat down in a chair before waiting for Grian to talk, while Grian went over to look at something on a table.

“Dad,” Grumbot started, when it was obvious Grian wasn't gonna start talking “What was with the questions about flying?”

Grian glanced back at him. “Not much, I was just thinking about something. You both know how you're too heavy for elytras, but I was thinking, if we remade some of your body into lighter but still strong metals, and used,” His talking stopped as he walked towards a wall. Grumbot was confused until suddenly a Shulker Box opened.

Grumbot stared for a second before laughing. “How did i not know that was there?” He got out between giggles.

Grian smiled at him. “I havent opened it around you, and you haven't snooped. I'm not surprised you haven't found it. I keep my old ideas in there, old blueprints, old mechanical pieces I just couldn't throw away, those sort of things.” Grian started unrolling a big piece of paper “And I remembered I had a blueprint of these old things.”

Grumbot stood up to look at the paper, and after taking a moment to understand it, froze with excitement. He glances up at Grian with a giant smile, and Grian smiled back.

---------

Grian let out a oof as Grumbot collided with him. Grumbot was giggling uncontrollably, and Grian was happy that Grumbot was happy. Grumbot let go to look at the blueprint again and looked up with eyes so full of excitement that Grian felt excited too.

“Can we actually make these?” Grumbot asked, almost bouncing up and down.

Grian laughed and nodded. “Yeah, we'll have to test them out, but there's no reason we can't. It will take a while.” He warned Grumbot “And I will test out the wings first when we think they're ready.”

He saw Grumbot take a breath, to say something when Grian continued. “I haven't tested these designs yet. I would rather, if something goes wrong, to have me gone for a couple days respawning, and you safe, instead of you-” Grian couldn't even finish the sentence before he had to take a deep breath before the tears started coming. “Instead of you getting hurt.” He ended quietly, putting his hand on Grumbots shoulder. Grumbot looked down for a moment, before looking up at Grian with sadness. 

“I understand Dad, but please don't get hurt, Don’t d-die and have to respawn, I don't know what I'd tell Jrumbot.”

Grian looked at him and smiled sadly. “I wasn't planning on dying anytime soon kid. Let's start figuring out what we need to get for the wings, yeah?” Grumbot nodded excitedly, and bolted for the metals cabinet. Grian laughed as he followed along.

--------

Grian Yawned and stretched out his arms. They were all sitting in front of a fireplace, enjoying tea and Jrumbot was cuddling with Maui.

The good feeling couldn't last forever though, because eventually Jrumbot looked up and over at Grian. “Dad,” He started “Why haven't we seen Papa?”

Grian froze for a second before closing his eyes. He didnt wanna talk about this to them, he didn't want to hurt them.

“Dad?” Grumbot questioned, seeing his Dad freeze up and look on the verge of tears.

Grian sighed and rubbed his face. “Both of you come here.” He murmured finally, patting the couch he was sitting on either side of him.

Grumbot and Jrumbot quickly came over to sit beside him, and Grian put both his arms on their shoulders.

Grian took a deep breath. “You have not seen mumbo, and have not been able to explore outside of my mansion area, for a couple reasons. One of these is that I'm not too sure how mobs will react to you, and How you'd react with being hurt by a mob. The other,...” Grian took a deep breath, and closed his eyes, letting his chin drop to his chest. “The other,” Grian continued, “Is because I'm not too sure of how the other Hermits would react to you.” He finally looked up and saw both of them staring at him in confusion. Grian tried to explain. “I'm one of the only ones who have experience with actually aware AI’s, I believe, and when some people are scared of something, they decide that they should hurt it before it hurts them.” He took another deep breath and looked into Grumbot and Jrumbots eyes, one after the other. “I do not believe that many of the Hermits would react this way, but I don't know exactly how they would react, and I don't want them to hurt you, either unknowingly or not.”

He saw Grumbots eyes widen and Jrumbots eyes narrow slightly. “I understand that reasoning dad,” Jrumbot started “But why haven't we seen papa?”

Grian sighed again. “Do you two remember yesterday morning, when I came back early and stayed on the roof for a bit?” they both nodded and Grian continued. “I did that, because Mum- Papa, upset me with his words.” He said, before taking a pause. He didn't look at either of his boys, but rather the ceiling as he said “He made some not nice jokes about Grumbot. Both of you must know however,” Grian started saying immediately when they both froze “That Mumbo doesn't know much about Aware AI’s. He believed Grumbot was an unaware aware AI, and that he was killed when he broke down. He did not know you had actual feelings, instead of manufactured ones. Mumbo often has issues figuring out other people's emotions, and most of the time redstone doesn't have emotions. Mumbo doesn't know about you two, and you haven't seen him,” Grian was starting to slow as he tried to find the words he needed. “Because, Because I am afraid. He murmured quietly. I am afraid he will unwittingly hurt you with his words, and I didnt want that to happen before you were aware it could happen. I'm sorry I kept this from you, but I wasn't aware of how to say it, or if you were ready for it, and decided to let one of you bring the topic up.”

There was silence for a moment before both of his boys hugged him. “I understand Dad,” Grumbot murmured into his shirt. “You didn't want us to get hurt, but thank you for telling us now.” Jrumbot nodded in agreement and Grian let out a wet laugh. Sounding on the edge of tears he said “What did I ever do without you boys?”

Grumbot pulled away and giggled as he said “Forgot about eating dinner.”

Grian paused before letting out a loud laugh which made Grumbot and Jrumbot start giggling.

“I can't say you're wrong.” Grian laughed, running a hand through his hair.

Grian then yawned, and stood up to stretch. “However nice this bonding session has been.” Grian started, turning toward his boys. “I believe it is bedtime. No buts!” he smiled at them as he said that, both of them having opened their mouths to deny it. It is nighttime, and very dark, and both of you need sleep.”

“Will you read to me dad,” Jrumbot murmured, fidgeting on the couch.

Grian smiled at him. “Of course, you only need ask.” He smirked at Jrumbot before saying “However, the first one to get to your room gets to pick the book, and oh look, Grumbots already at the hallway-” Jrumbot shrieked out a laugh as a sudden race took place in the hallway, and Grian smiled as he tidied the place up, talking the mugs to the kitchen to wash tomorrow.

He then walked to the boys bedroom, to find Jrumbot pouting as Grumbot sat on his bed.

“What will the story be?” Grian asked them, and Grumbot smiled before saying, “what about the one about the Dragons saving the world?”

Jrumbot glanced up with wide eyes and Grian grinned. Even though Grumbot had obviously won, he had also chosen his brother's favorite book to read.

Grian walked over to the bookshelf and found the book, “A Warrior's Tail” before walking to Jrumbots bed. He started reading to them, and within the third chapter, they were both asleep. 

Grian smiled and leaned over both of them to kiss their foreheads, before whispering ‘night’ and leaving the room. He walked toward his own bedroom and climbed into bed. Grian looked at the ceiling and felt Maui joined him, purring as he curled up around Grians head. He reached up to scratch Maui under the chin, before yawning and turning off his lamp.

That talk was one he had been dreading, and it went over quite well. Grians last thought before sleeping was ‘Maybe I should introduce them to another Hermit.’

-----------

For whatever reason, Autocorrect really hates all names. Anyways, I know who the Hermit is, But do any of you? I want to see who you think the hermit is!

Also, if you liked this story, please comment! I loved reading all of your comments on the last one! They helped me make this chapter as quick as possible! (I may also be procrastinating on other stories with a Grumbot Fix-it Fic but, oh well)

#grian #hermitcraft #Grumbot #Jrumbot #hermitcraft season 7 #Mumbo Jumbo #I love this family so much #The best family is a man and his 2 robot sons #I hope i made it clear how much Grian loves his boys #and how much he doesnt want to see them hurt #>:) #robodad Grian Au

[brain-jarred]

Chapter 5. Cactus

Light. Not filtered through darkened glass or produced artificially. Real actual light. It was morning, and the sun was just beginning to rise. Hal began to run away from the facility, trying to cover as much distance away from it as possible. Param followed. They ran until the facility was a good distance away, and then they stopped. Hal looked at the sun, and then immediately regretted it. “Ow.” He said, rubbing his eyes. “What?” Param asked, concerned.

“The sun hurts my eyes, don't look at it.” Param just stared at Hal before also looking at the sun. They not only looked at it, they stared at it, confused. “It’s not hurting my eyes.” They said, “It must be because you still have human eyes, and I have the clearly superior robot eyes. “I dont care.” Hal said, continuing to walk. “We just escaped certain death, and we almost killed a child. I was afraid you were going to just be okay with going through with it.” “Uh.” Param looked surprised. “What!? No. I wouldn't be okay with that. I was afraid that you would be okay with it, and then I would have to go along with it.” They said, trying to hide the fact that they really didn't see any issue in it. Like it was just their job? But seeing Hal’s face back there… It made them not want to be like this.

They wondered how Hal did it, how he could be so callous yet caring. It was easy to see him as the cold one out of the two of them, it was easy to see him as the brains, and Param as the heart, but that really wasnt true. Hal still clung stubbornly onto his humanity, where Param only had small scraps of it left. Most of these scraps only remaining for Hal’s sake. 

But enough about that, they were out there. Outside. Param took a moment to look at their surroundings. The sunrise casted oranges and pinks across the sky and ground. And...sand. The ground was very sandy, and there was a strange- wait. “Oh my gosh, that's a real life cactus!” Param said, rushing over to the plant.

“Why are you like this- wait that's actually kind of cool-” Hal looked away and sighed. They had to admit, it was cool to see something new, even if it was a bit stupid to dilly dally when they were more than likely being chased right now.

“We need to focus.” He said, putting a hand on Param’s shoulder. “We can't mess around with a cactus, not when we are on the run like this.” Param made direct eye contact with Hal as they ripped off a chunk of the cactus. “Why.” Hal said exasperated. “You never know.” And then param walked away. “Wh- Where are you even going to put it?” Hal asked, following param. “Where do you think?” Param opened up their chest cavity and put the cactus in with the extra Nutrient Solution they always kept there.  “Okay then.” Hal said, accepting this. “Listen. We can't get distracted by random stuff, trust me, I am also tempted to lick the sand right now, but I won't, because I have a thing called self restraint.” “Why do you want to lick the sand?!” Param questioned. 

“WE CAN'T GET DISTRACTED!!” He dodged the question. He took a deep breath. “We are in a serious situation and I feel like you're not being serious.” Param was quiet for a moment.

 “Hal.” They began. “This is the worst day of my life. Everything I have ever known has crumbled around me. I don't know what we are going to do, I don't know if I will even make it out of this alive, I probably won't. I don't have much faith in that. I just...I want to spend what little time I have left having fun with you. I just want to savor this.” They said sincerely. 

And finally they broke down. “I’m so fucking scared, Hal.” They said, wrapping their arms around themself. “I'm scared and I don't want to die.” 

Hal hesitated for a moment, unsure of what to say. They continued to walk as he leaned against Param. “Me too. I'm scared too.” he admitted. “I'm terrified of either of us dying. I don't want to lose you! That's why I am so focused on us getting away from that place because I don't want you to get captured.” He explained. 

“Maybe you think it's inevitable that they're gonna get us - and maybe it is- but look at us right now! Look at how far we’ve gotten. This is the farthest we've ever been from that place. I say that we keep pushing our luck. We can savor everything when we are safe.” Hal said, offering a reassuring smile with his eyes. Param thought for a moment before nodding. “Yeah. You're right. Let’s get to walking then.” “We are already walking.” Hal said, trying to lighten the mood. “You know what I mean.” Param smiled.

And so they walked. And walked. And walked. The sun rose and it bore down upon them, Param was unaffected by the heat, but Hal was another story. “Slow...slow down.” Hal said, stumbling after Param. His movements were sluggish, the two had been walking for an hour and a half at this point. “What's wrong? Did you look at the sun again?” Param asked, concernedly looking back at Hal. Hal stopped for a moment to just catch his breath. “It's too hot out here, the sun is cooking my brain.” He was exaggerating somewhat, but it really did feel like way. The psychic ectoplasm that made up his body wasn't able to sweat or cool him down. He dropped to his knees. “Oh jeez. Uh. Hm.” Param tapped their chin. They took a moment to consider their options. “Ok! I got it.” They said, snapping their fingers. They then leaned down, and picked up Hal, who immediately stood up. “Oh, uh. No thanks.” He said, wrenching himself away. He felt weird about letting Param carry him and he would rather not deal with those emotions at that second. He stood up, willing himself not to fall over again. “Alright then, get cooked then.” Param shrugged, and then started walking away. 

Hal followed.

And so the sun continued its path in the sky, eventually after a whole day of walking and mindless conversation, the sun dipped below the horizon. “We should probably stop.” Hal said, resting a hand on a rock. He looked really haggard, and his body was goopy. It left a blue residue on the rock where he sat his hand. “Yeah...I’m getting a bit tired.” Param admitted. They sat down. They were slightly nervous when the sun began to set, they didn't like the dark very much, but it was okay since the moonlight illuminated the desert well enough. Still, it put them on edge despite this. They didnt know why they were afraid of the dark. Hal also sat down, his lab coat was stained blue with all the sweaty psychic residue. He leaned back and sighed, glad to finally be out of the heat. A few stars poked out of the sky, tiny white dots in a sea of indigo The two just sat there for a few moments. The desert was quiet, and the research facility was far beyond the horizon, that place the two had lived in for the entirety of their living memories was out of sight now. Param was starting to regret leaving. Sure, killing an innocent child wasn't something that they liked, but she had only been one person! The rest of the people that they did vivisections on were guilty or already dying, it was fine! Everything had been fine. Param turned away from Hal, and sighed. Why? Why had such a simple look made Param throw away their entire work life? Now they were stranded in the desert, with no real sign of civilization. Maybe Param should have just ignored it. Maybe they should have shot Hal a glare, mentally told him to suck it up, and went through with the procedure-

“Hey Param? Can I have some of those uh- solution packets?” Hal asked, interrupting Param’s ugly thoughts. “Oh- Sure.” Param took out one of the packets and handed it to him, they then looked away into the distance, back the way they came. They looked and saw no sign of civilization, no sign of home. They just wanted to go home, and wanted this nightmare to be over. They just wanted a world where they weren't so impulsive, so reckless and foolhardy that they threw a fucking bonesaw at Dr. Brian. Dr. Brian was pretty nice, despite his cold exterior, Param knew that. They knew that this was the wrong way, this was the wrong path to take. But there was no going back. And so they laid down their head and sighed, trying to ignore Hal’s presence, trying to ignore the part of them that didn't regret it at all.

#oc story #brainjarred #oc #ocs #writing

[rakimaiirisa]

Writing practice.

Asbjorn sighed and eyed the tiny grey cat that gazed back at him, eyes slightly narrowed in annoyance. " You really want me to, huh?" He asked. The cat nodded and settled into resting position, a position he called the breadloaf because she looked like one. He grinned as the cat shot him a death stare. She had heard that then. Well, linking minds didnt come with its drawbacks. Not that he gave a shit, truth be told.

Settling back in her chair, he picked up the electronic tablet and read the instructions listed. Listen to the audio on the tablet and answer honestly. Simple enough. Nodding, he pressed the audio button and listened and then frowned. He stared at his hands for bit, taking a deep breath now and then to settle the swirl of emotions that engulfed him suddenly. Of all the questions...

"Why?!" He demanded and the cat cocked its head slightly, green eyes alert. A silvery voice echoed in his thoughts, "it is necessary to look at your past so you can establish your future."

For a moment, he considered leaving. His creator she might be, but his past was his own, wasnt it? He gave a hollow laugh as he realized his mistake. Even that wasn't his either. Fuck it. He didnt want to. He had better things to do then this. As he stood to leave, the silvery voice spoke again.

"While I may have created you, the story is your own. It is driven by you, the muse. I am only an observer in your life. I take no credit in your past or future. My only purpose here to write it down, to give it life in whatever way I can. My question was not meant to hurt you. I only want to understand it."

He paused, considering the grey cat as it gazed back at him. The green eyes that had shone so vibrantly earlier were muted and dulled now. As they stared at each other, she issued a soft meow at him. He hesitated and then reached out, gently scratching under her ears, listening to her purr under his touch. He continued for a moment, then sighed and sank back in his chair, aware of her eyes on him. The silence felt endless as he debated with his emotions but in the end he nodded, swallowing the hard lump in his throat as he did.

"Very well. But this is the only time."

He picked up the tablet, pressing the audio as he did so and the emotionless voice asked again the question that brought up a piece of his past that he didn't want to remember.

"What happened on the day you parents passed?"

He took a deep breath and began.

"Its's my fault my parents are dead." He said,feeling the sharp familiar stab of shame and anguish pierce him once again. " I wanted to go hunt that day but my Da said no . That the day didnt feel right. But I didnt care, I thought he was just wanted me home to do extra chores around the camp. He said he would take me hunting on another day but I was angry and impatient. I waited til he left to speak to Thorigg and then I stuck out."

He paused again and rubbed his face, struggling to keep his tone from cracking. In his minds eye, he could see his father stern face soften slightly at his teenage sons impatience, watched his hand as he grasped his sons shoulder as he uttered his familar mantra of "Young pups who see the prey before the pack dont survive long." A warning he wished he had listened to.

He shook his head, banishing the scene and continued, struggling to keep his tone even. " I headed towards a spot I always found prey at. But as I got closer, i noticed there was something different. The sounds of wildlife that were normally present were quiet. I figured that maybe I had scared them with my presence so I decided to go hunt somewhere else. Then the smell of bear hit me."

He paused and took a moment to collect himself. " I didn't have a chance. Before I could run, one of the werebears picked me up my my neck and then threw me against a tree. I tried to get up but before I could, another one jumped on me and I nearly passed out from the weight of the bastard as he held me down. I heard them say that my pelt would be a fine addition to the other werewolves they collected. Suddenly I smelled a familiar scent and then my father burst out from the nearby brush, my mother close behind him."

Once again, he saw the scene so vividly. His father, huge in his werewolf form, roaring a challenge to his sons attackers as he rushed to his aid while his mother issued her own, her silver great sword lashing out, piercing the nearest beast's hide and causing it to snarl in rage as it back ed away. His tone cracked as he continued.

"My father knocked the one that held me off and tore its throat out. But that victory didnt last long as 2 more swarmed him. He managed to break free for a moment and the last I saw of him, he had them at bay, with them circling him before my mother dragged me away."

He looked down his hands again, clenching them so hard it hurt. " We ran for abit,but then we heard yelps of pain that cut abruptly. My mother wanted to go back, I could tell, but instead she pushed us on, towards home. But we didnt make it too far before the smell of bear was upon us and then we saw him. I didnt have a chance to dodge before it lashed out with its paw, its claws tearing at my face and sending me flying. I lay there crying, unable to see and then I heard my mother scream out to me " Run Asbjorn! RUN!! As I got up, I heard the cracking of bone and the hiss of pain as she shifted become a snarl. I heard her roar and werebear answer her and then the sound of them fighting with each other. "

He smiled bitterly. "I ran as my mother asked. I couldn't see where I was going so I tripped and fell over everything. I ran as far as I could before the pain in my face became too much and I passed out. The next thing I knew I was in Ravenrock, in the care of a dunmer healer, Aphia Velothi. A local hunter had found me and had brought me to her. I stayed under her care for over a month. She managed to save my eyesight and could've removed the scars as well. But I refused to let her. They are a reminder of what my stupidity cost me. "

He looked up at the cat with reddened eyes. "There, are you satisfied? Did that help build the story for you? Do you need to know how much I hate myself because I'm the reason they're dead?!"

The cat stood and stared at him for a long moment, her expression unreadable and then in one fluid motion leapt, landing lightly in his lap. As he reached to fling her off, she wrapped her small paws around his neck and began to purr.

"Dont blame yourself. You were just a child, Asbjorn."

The hand he had placed on her stilled then trembled. With a shaky hand, he began to pet her, unaware of the hot tears that splashed into her fur as he struggled to contain memories that threatened to overwhelm him.

#writing practice #Asbjorn #long post #unable to put under cits because im on mobile #my writing #skyrim rambles