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#haikyuu angst drabble
tetsumie · 1 year
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"𝐘𝐎𝐔'𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘"
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read part 2 here!
pairing: tsukishima x reader & suna x reader
genre: hurt/comfort
a/n: sorry i got carried away writing these ahh i sort of twisted the prompt of "when they call you clingy" into my own sort of thing idk how to explain but hopefully this turned out well :,) also not proofread so sorry about the mistakes! and as always feel free to send me requests and tell me ur thoughts on my writing!
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tsukishima kei
tsukishima, you, and a few of the former karsuno volleyball players decided to have a small little reunion dinner after not seeing each other for so long.
everyone's embracing each other with hugs and to be frank, it's really nice of him to invite you to meet his friends from high school! you're really looking forward to getting to know them and maybe even getting to know your boyfriend a bit more.
as all of you are sitting at the table debating what to order, there's much chit chat between everyone and you swear you haven't seen kei so carefree in a while. sure, he's still throwing his sarcastic, snarky comments but they don't hit too harshly towards his teammates.
they are most definitely used to this.
the food has arrived and way too much wine has been ordered. with their slurred words and pink cheeks, you can tell all of them are going to blackout the moment they all get home.
"kei, so how'd you pull this gorgeous girl?" tanaka asks out of nowhere "ain't no way she fell for your snarky ass personality."
you and him both let out a chuckle and he replied with, "nah, they're just clingy as fuck and i guess they were fun to keep around."
you go quiet and the laughter has sort of died out. but the drinks keep pouring and nishinoya speaks.
"god, you're a fucking asshole," nishinoya chimes. "she's way too good for you.
although the conversation begins to take a turn in a different direction, you can't seem to get his words out of your mind.
clingy. he thinks i'm clingy.
a ball of insecurity starts to form in your stomach and his comment starts the train of overthinking. you keep telling yourself that he's had too many drinks.
yet a part of you is telling you that drunk thoughts are sober words.
how long has he thought of me as "clingy?"
the small chuckles and laughs that escape your lips have come to a halt and now you're feeling incredibly insecure. you begin to zone out and start chugging down a few glasses of wine to drown out your surroundings.
after a few eventful hours, you and tsukishima decide to grab a taxi and head home for the night. he unlocks the door to your shared apartment and you immediately head into the bedroom to change your clothes, not sparing him a second glance.
tsukishima enters the bed after cleaning up and his arm drapes over your chest. your body goes completely stiff and you're super uncomfortable with his touch, especially after his comment about you being clingy.
the moment you hear his light snores, you slowly remove his arm off your body and turn to face away from him. a feeling of numbness begins to overtake your body and you feel a sense of emptiness within.
the next morning, tsukishima woke up with a horrible headache and he instantly regretted drinking so much last night. he groans and pats your side of the bed and is greeted by just the bedsheets and not you.
grumbling, he got out of bed in search of you and finds you standing by the balcony with a cup of coffee in your hand. in that moment, his heart skips a beat and he's reminded of how much he loves you.
you yelp in surprise when you feel two arms slither around your torso and his chin resting on your shoulder. "good morning baby," he kisses your cheek.
"hi kei," you say curtly.
"what's for breakfast?"
"i just made myself toasted bread with jam. you can just make some cereal or something. i think we still have your lucky charms in the pantry," you tell him.
he pulls away from you and he feels something is off with you. you feel distant.
the feeling is confirmed when the both of you are sitting on the living room sofa while watching the new episode of your favorite reality tv show. kei expects you to come close to him and rest your head on his shoulder like you usually do yet there you are, in his vicinity, but sitting on the other end of the couch, clinging to a throw pillow.
he can't seem to concentrate on the movie when the only thing he can see is you sitting to yourself, gone completely quiet. he doesn't know what's wrong and he can't rack his mind as to what might have happened that made you so distant.
after the movie ends, he kisses your forehead and he feels your body stiffen.
what's going on? i don't know what i did?
he pulls away and looks at you. "y/n, something's wrong," he states.
you refuse to meet his gaze now and your twiddling with your fingers. he seems to have no recollection of what he's said to you last night. although, he might not recall what he said, it's the only thing you can recall in your mind. ever since this morning, whenever, you look at him, the only thing running in your mind is his words, "nah, she's just clingy as fuck and i guess she was fun to keep around."
"we're good," you reply promptly. "don't worry about it."
he grabs your hands and puts them in his which catches you off guard. you love the feeling of his hand in yours but the rational part of your brain wants to pull away, thinking about how he thought you were so clingy.
"listen, i'm not good at this. i'm not good at communicating my feelings but for you, i want to do better. so please, it would mean a lot if you could tell me what's wrong so i can help you and... us."
this is the most genuine you've seen him in a while and although to most, it may have seemed like some half-assed speech but to you, it felt raw and vulnerable.
"ok well," you began. "last night, when we were out with your friends, you were talking with your friends and well, you mentioned something about me. and it made me wonder if you think i'm clingy?"
he was confused. "no, i don't think you're clingy anymore? i don't know what you're talking about?"
the "anymore" in his response to you was something that saddened you a little. he found me clingy yet never told me?
"so you did think i was clingy, right?"
with a deep breath, he began to explain himself, "when we got together, i wasn't really used to... being so close to someone. you would always hold my hand or loop your arm in mine or something. you would always be holding me or touching me and i wasn't sure how i felt it about it at first. i was never one for physical touch so when you began to show that to me, i just... it felt... suffocating."
you're looking into his eyes, swimming with sadness and searching for answers, and he feels a mixture of sadness and guilt as he continues to explain himself.
"but being with you, i've grown to love your touch and honestly, now that i think about it, i don't know what i'd do if you just stopped being yourself and clinging on to me. i would go insane if you stopped."
kei leans in for a hug and you hug him back. you missed holding him like this and well, you just miss him. but now that kei has said all this, you're not sure about anything anymore.
you pull away and tell him, "i'm sorry you couldn't tell me that you were uncomfortable with my touches. i should have asked you how fast or slow you wanted to go and i shouldn't have forced my affection on to you."
"if you want, we can slow down. i understand," you say with a tone of finality in your voice.
"no!" he immediately replied. "it's.. it's not that. you don't force your affection on to me. you never have. i just am awkward with affection and growing up, i've never had it so i'd get super fidgety and that's why i think i felt like you were being clingy. but i love it."
"i love it when you hold my hand when we're walking to the grocery store. i love it when you doodle on my hand with your fingers when we're waiting for the food to come when we eat out. i love it when you tell me about the little stories from work while you're cooking dinner. i love it when you mumble in your sleep and snuggle close to me when it gets cold at night. i love everything about you."
kei was very much out of his comfort zone as he told you all these things and it surprised you that he noticed all these little details. you could tell he was getting embarrassed, considering how his cheeks were turning pink. you couldn't help but let a little smile seep through your facial features.
"you're so sappy," you reply.
"oh shut up."
you both laugh and then he cups your cheek in his hand, rubbing his thumb in circles. "don't ever think you force your affection on me because you never do, okay?"
"okay, kei."
the both of you spend the rest of the day with one another, making comforting memories together that the both of you will fondly remember in the future.
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suna rintaro
you're not even sure how this argument even started. all you can remember is asking suna if he could accompany you to a work party that you were invited to. it was supposed to be a relatively relaxing event with not too much worries yet suna was once again trying to bail out.
"come on rin! it's one party and we never get to go out anymore," you try again for the nth time.
"y/n, jesus, i told you this, i don't want to fucking go! practice is draining me out and the one day i get off, you want me to go to some stupid fucking work party. can't you see that i want to be home?"
"we won't even have to be there that long! i just want you to come with me so you can meet some of my friends and support me. i'm really not asking for much," you counter. "i'm always trying to go to your games to support you from the stands and i'm asking you to do this one thing for me."
"i never fucking asked you to come to my games!" suna's voice began to rise and you felt yourself shrink. you had never seen him so intensely angry before. he was always so nonchalant so seeing this side of him made you nervous. "god, you're just so suffocating with everything. you always wanna do shit together, like jeez, give me a break. you're so fucking clingy sometimes; i just want space."
your mouth snaps shut and you can't find it in yourself to even reply. suna leaves the bedroom and you can head the jangle of his keys and the front door opens and then slams shut. a tear escapes from one eye and then all of a sudden, it's a full blown mental breakdown. you're sitting on the bed, crying off all your makeup.
after your cries turn into sniffles, you call up one of your colleagues, telling them you won't be attending the party. that night, you end up crying yourself to sleep.
suna had come home quite late that night after storming out.
in his head, he admits that the argument had blown up for no reason. but he just really didn't want to see your coworkers. he was cranky, annoyed, and irritated, making him deeply irrational.
as he walks into the bedroom, he sees you fast asleep in your clothes that you were planning to go out in and your makeup smudged all over your face. he felt incredibly guilty.
he messed up big time and he had to fix this. he hoped in the morning, the both of you would wake up together so he could talk it out and apologize.
you wake up the next morning feeling a lot better than last night. you turn to see suna lying in bed and a part of you just wants to run your fingers through your hair. as your fingers hover above his head, you're reminded of his words from last night.
you're so fucking clingy sometimes. i just want space.
your fingers immediately retracted and you decided to get up to start the rest of your day. you didn't want to let his words get to you. he said his opinion and there's nothing much you could do other than give him space. you'd be doing him a favor by giving him that space that he wanted, right?
suna shifts in bed, arm reaching out to your side of the bed, subconsciously. as he pats down your side of the bed, he feels the emptiness and he jolts up out of bed.
he's walking out of the bedroom and he sees you sitting on the couch, watching something on the television.
a sigh of relief escapes his mouth, thanking whatever deity out there that you hadn't left. even if you did, he couldn't blame you for it. he hurt you and there was no denying that.
"hi babe," he casually says alouds and plops on the couch next to you.
"hey."
your tone is cold and to be frank, you could care less than speak to him right now. seeing him is just a constant reminder of how clingy you are and you really don't want to be confronted with the feeling of sadness again.
in an attempt to smooth things over with you, he tries to start conversation in hopes that things will get back to normal naturally and maybe.. just maybe you'll know that he's sorry without him saying it.
"osamu was talking about some new onigiri thing he made and he wanted to drop some off for us to try. should i say yes?" he asked.
"sure."
your responses to his efforts are completely shut down and he's just praying that things get better with time. he reassures himself that things will go back to normal, it's just a matter of time. within a few days, things will be back to normal!
that's what he thought until his first volleyball match of the season came about. as he was standing in the court, his eyes scanned the rest of the stadium for your figure in hopes of finding you wearing his jersey but to no avail, he couldn't find you.
he assumed you were running late or stuck in traffic. no matter what you would be here, right?
but the first set is already over and you're nowhere to be seen. taking a quick break, he texts you:
suna: r u here?
suna: i don't see u in the stands.
it's delivered and suna's back in the court. he's misreading all of the opponent's attacks and his blocks are all being haphazardly done. the only thing on his mind is you.
the EJP coach calls for a timeout and sits him out for the rest of the match. "i don't know what's going on with you but you need to pull it together. your slacking is messing up with the rest of the team," coach berated him and all suna could do was nod his head.
he sat on the bench and immediately grabs his phone to text you.
suna: can you please answer?
suna: or call me? please?
suna: fuck y/n
suna: r u ok?
with no response, concern is etched onto his face. he tells his coach that he has to go and although he's about to suffer hell when he goes to practice tomorrow for dipping, he needs to see you.
you're seeing all of his messages.
you've seen all of them.
and you don't want to respond to a single one of them.
you know he's coming home and he's about to bombard you with questions and you don't want to respond to him. you don't want to come off as clingy again.
you hear the jangle of the keys and prepare yourself.
he opens the door and finds you in the kitchen, making yourself some snacks.
"so where were you today?" he begins.
"at home."
his hands find their way to your waist and he slowly turns you around to look him in the eye. "why didn't you come?"
you sigh in frustration. "i don't know what you want from me. you say i'm clingy and you want some space and on top of that you mentioned how you've never asked me to go to any of your games so here i am respecting your wishes like you asked yet you have the fucking audacity to ask me where i was and why i wasn't with you?"
his hands let go of your waist and he steps back to fully look at you.
"rin, i don't know what you want from me anymore."
suna's mouth opens and then shuts, not sure as to what to say to you. you were more upset about his comment than you let on and now all your anger and frustration was coming out.
"listen, i-"
"no, you listen to me," you interrupt, immediately shutting him up. "all i wanted that night was for you to come to my work party. it's all i wanted. that party was mainly for me because i helped our company reach this new milestone! and i wanted you to come and celebrate with me and my colleagues. is it so much to ask for my boyfriend to come support me?"
"and then you go on to say i'm clingy and do you have any idea how much it hurt me when you said that? when you would talk to me about anything, the only thing going through my head would be the fact that you called me clingy and god, i just wanted to vanish in thin air because i hated knowing that you thought that of me which is why i gave you your space. i kept thinking you just didn't want my affection."
you rest your elbows on the kitchen countertop and put your face in your hands. you finally burst out with all the feelings that have been suffocating your mind. it felt good to finally relieve it all but you could only imagine what was going through his mind. was he mad or upset or did he just not care about my feelings?
all of a sudden, you feel two arms wrap around your torso and kisses to the top of your head.
"love, you're not clingy. if anything, i'm the clingy one. i always want you by my side like at my games or when i go out with my friends or even if i'm just lying in bed. i want you."
he strokes your hair and now you're turning around to look at him again. his eyes are wide and a bit glassy. this is probably one of the first times you've seen emotion on his face aside from his regular snarky remarks.
"i wish i could take back what i said that night but i can't. but please know that i don't know what i'd do without you. i was really upset that night and all i wanted to was just sleep it off. but your insistence to go got me aggravated and i lashed out. you don't deserve that. you never deserve that."
"i want to be the one you wake up to in the morning. i want to be the one you take to all your work parties and events. i want to be the one you tell you gossip with. i want to be the one you have your late night talks with. i want to be the one you end your nights with. i want to be the one you spend the rest of your life with. i want to be yours."
tears started to escape your eyes and your heart was swollen. suna was never one to be so open with his emotions yet here he was opening so much to you. you hug his torso and sob into his chest.
"i love you, i'm sorry," you say.
"i love you too, and i'm sorry too," he replies, kissing the top of your forehead.
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© tetsumie 2023 all rights reserved 
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yenqa · 1 month
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firsts
synopsis — sakusa and you have never had a conversation, and honestly you’re terrified of the man. but one conversation turns out to be many more of your firsts with sakusa.
warnings — reader is scared of men LMFAO, not really any
pairing — sakusa x implied fem!reader
wordcount — 710
a/n — happy birthday to himm! also my first hq post in a while OOPS also not proofread sorry!
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You’ve never really talked to Sakusa.
You had been the manager of the volleyball team since your first year–and you had known him since then, but for some reason, you haven’t talked to him unless it’s volleyball related.
In fact–you don’t think you’ve ever had a conversation with him. But there's a first for everything, right?
Itachiyama has made it to nationals (not like it’s a surprise), and everyone has just arrived. The room continues to fill with people you don’t know, so you decide it’s best to stick with your team so you don’t get lost.
Well apparently that was a horrible idea to everyone else. Because you’ve lost everyone but Sakusa. 
And you’re terrified. Surrounded in a room full of men you don’t know sounded like your worst nightmare, and you were living it currently.
Frantically scanning the room for anyone that’s not Sakusa, you somehow can’t spot any of the familiar bright yellow and green jackets your team is wearing.
Everyone knows that Sakusa doesn’t like to be bothered. But when you make eye contact with him, you change your expression to a way where he understands you’re pleading for help.
And he nods once.
Your mouth breaks out into a smile, and you shimmy your way to the crowd. Letting out a sigh of relief–you lean on the wall for support, muttering a small thank you to Sakusa. 
You don’t expect him to say anything back, but you can hear his muffled voice say, “You okay?”
Tilting your head slightly up to make eye contact with him, you smile as you say, “Yeah–I’m fine. Are you nervous?”
You’re not sure why you ask the question, he probably doesn’t want to be bothered. I mean–you were still kind of shocked that he let you even be near him.
“Not really. Are you?”
You’re even more shocked when he continues the conversation. You’d expect he’d be the most rude person if he didn’t want to talk. “I-uhm I am a little bit. But we’re exempt from playing today right?”
Yeah–this definitely is the first and last conversation you’ll ever have with him.
He nods.
Then it’s silent.
Surprisingly, the silence isn't the most awkward thing you’ve experienced. It feels as if you’re just two people co-existing.
You watch as everyone excitedly hugs each other or glares at their next opponent. One person even tries to rile up the other, eliciting a small chuckle from you.
From the corner of your eye you can tell he’s curious, but he hasn’t said anything yet. This time, you take initiative to point at the players, also describing the jacket colors.
And you swear you can hear him laugh.
Not a full–hearty laugh obviously, but a small chuckle. A quiet one that you don’t even notice. But it’s definitely the first time you’ve heard him do anything resembling a laugh.
“You laughed.” You blurt out, before you even realize. 
He furrows his brows, “I did.”
Your eyes widen, “Sorry–oh my gosh, it’s just the first time I’ve heard your laugh before, Sakusa-san. I swear I didn’t mean it like that–you just have a nice laugh–”
And now he’s actually laughing–like not even hard to hear.
He’s laughing, he’s hunched over, shaking and clutching his stomach. You don’t think you’ve ever felt more mortified in your life.
“It wasn’t that funny was it?” You ask, a frown on your face.
Sakusa catches his breath, “Funnier than any of the jokes Komori tries to make.”
“There wasn’t even a joke! And I happen to like the jokes he makes!”
“Only if you’re sick in the head.”
You scoff at his remark, “Wow, Sakusa-san, you’re very hard to please.”
“Kiyoomi.”
“Another complaint?” You tease, trying to play dumb at what he’s trying to imply. 
“Call me Kiyoomi.”
You can feel heat rush to your cheeks, you tuck your hair back behind your ear and mutter, “Okay, Kiyoomi.”
And even though he’s wearing a white mask, you swear you can see his eyes crinkle and you can assume the corners of his mouth turn up ever so slightly. 
You’ve had many firsts with Sakusa today. This is the first time you’ve seen him smile–just maybe next time he’ll do it while his face is fully shown.
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yenqa © please do not copy, steal or translate.
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grapementos · 11 months
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walk away as the door slams
aged up bakugo x reader
cw: heavily! toxic relationships, emotionally abusive (gaslighting, etc.), angst.
pt 2 here.
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bakugo isn't the same person he was in high school. he grew into a top five hero and opened his own agency, only to be brutally torn apart by the tabloids.
scandal after scandal, you watched him crack. like glass, he grew more and more fragile each time he was made out to be a monster, an asshole, a douchebag--whatever other name was thrown out there.
each time, you were there to comfort him and stand by his side against every rumor and generalization. still, it scared you as you watched his resolve weaken. it was as if he didn't see the point in being a hero anymore.
then came the headline, the article that had him hanging up his gauntlets in exchange for civilian life. the article had an incriminating photo of him holding up his hand to a child. of course, it was taken out of context; bakugo had merely been guiding the child away from the rubble of the building near them.
however, the media ate it up, and bakugo decided that being a hero wasn't worth the false allegations. he announced his resignation the same day and rid the entire house of hero news.
it broke your heart to see him give up his dream, so you'd tried and failed time and time again to talk him out of it. you even invited midoriya and kirishima to persuade him to become a hero again, but his mind was made.
he'd since picked up a new, low-brow job that kept him out of the public eye. with that, unfortunately, came stress regarding bills, grocery shopping, and necessary budget cuts. it was a huge adjustment, one that led to frequent arguments.
you worked from home, so you were able to keep it clean and cook meals for the most part. you tried so hard to keep your home a place where the two of you could coexist happily, but he always came home with an unfulfilled look in his eyes.
truth be told, you were exhausted, but bringing it up just made bakugo frustrated, so you avoided the subject. instead, you'd ask him about work, only to be brushed off.
it hurt.
"katsuki," you called from your spot at the table, finishing up some work, "what do you want to eat tonight?"
"dunno." he grunted, walking out of your shared bedroom.
"right. so helpful." you sighed, looking at your laptop once more, "do you have a general idea? or do you want to cook?"
"i just got home from an 8-hour shift." he looked at you like you were dumb, eyes narrowed, "can you lay off with the million questions?"
"it's a simple question. i need to know if i have to defrost anything." you shut your laptop a little harder than necessary, "i work too, you know."
he laughed bitterly but didn't say anything.
"what?" you demanded, hands on your hips.
"oh, nothing. just thought it was funny, is all."
"what's so damn funny?"
"you, sitting on a laptop all day. 'working'," he used air-quotes, opening the cupboards.
"really? you wanna go there?" you closed the cupboard he was looking in, cheeks flushed with frustration.
he stared at you, jaw clenched, "can you move?"
"can you stop being so damn mean?"
"god, i'm not being mean." he shook his head and opted for digging through the fridge instead, "y'just being too damn sensitive."
you took in a deep breath, red hot anger beginning to boil up in your gut and through your hands all the way down to your fingers.
"stop digging through the fridge when i'm trying to talk to you, please."
he didn't even spare you a glance, pulling out the last cold water bottle.
"katuski." you demanded, louder.
"my god, what?" he slammed the fridge closed, leaning back on the counter, "as if i don't get nagged enough by my boss."
"i'm not nagging you. i'm," you stammered, trying not to escalate the situation into an argument, "i'm trying to see what you want for dinner. that's all."
"just make whatever. i'm not hungry anyways." he tossed the plastic bottle into the trash, plopping down at the table.
you rubbed your temples, trying so hard to maintain your calm, "okay."
-
the two of you were sat across each other at the kitchen table. you ate something quick you'd whipped up, finally breaking the silence, "they're considering me for a promotion. it's a pretty significant payraise, and i think i--"
"god, are you fuckin' kidding me?" he interrupted, eyes suddenly aflame.
"what?" you cocked your head, confused at his sudden irritation.
"you just love rubbing that shit in my face, huh? you're always talking about how you get paid more than i do, how work is so great, and now this? great job, breadwinner."
"katsuki, we're partners, we both contribute to this household no matter what. i'm not the... breadwinner." you insisted, pain blooming in your chest, "i thought you'd be happy for me."
"like you were so happy for me to quit that hero gig? so you can get all the glory of supporting us?"
"is that really what you think?" you stood, not able to control the flames of anger licking at your chest, "katsuki, you know damn well i gave my all trying to talk you into staying a hero."
"bullshit. you just wanted it to look that way." he stood too, hands planted firmly on the table, "because that's what you do. you pretend you care, and then just soak up all the glory for it."
you clenched your jaw, "not everyone cares for glory as much as you do. i don't know why you think that, but i know you loved being a hero, and i supported that because i love you."
"do you? or did you only get with me to be the partner of a hero?" he spat, eyes narrow and downright venomous, "poor partner of dynamight, they must go through so much to endure his anger issues. poor fuckin' you, right? poor y/n."
your lower lip quivered, the back of your eyes burning, and he laughed. he laughed.
"what? you're gonna cry, really?" he scoffed, shaking his head, "fine, fuckin' cry. that's all you seem to know how to do."
you inhaled sharply through your nose, eyes trained steadily on him, "fuck you." you whispered, hands balled into fists by your side.
"say it louder." he challenged, "maybe it'll actually do something."
"fuck you, bakugo katsuki." tears fell freely down your cheeks, but you weren't sad. you were pissed.
you walked around the table and jabbed your finger in his chest, "i have done so much for you. so goddamn much. i have stood by you, i have disproved every bad thing the media had to say, i've supported you, and-" your voice wobbled, "it's never fucking enough. nothing is ever enough for you. someone is always after you, someone is always praying on your downfall, because everything's about katsuki, right?"
he was stunned silent, leaning back away from you. his face was conflicted, eyes wide with surprise.
"well news-fucking-flash, the world doesn't revolve around you. and neither do i," you dropped your hand, wiping at your cheeks, "so i'm done. i'm done fighting for us, because you have never once tried for me."
"y/n--"
"y'know, katsuki." you paused on your way to the bedroom, "i think they were right about you. you are a douchebag. an asshole. a monster."
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kentolove · 2 years
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When Tsukishima gets comfortable, he really gets comfortable.
You learned that eight months into your relationship, when Tsukishima walked into the bathroom—with you on the toilet—heading for the sink to brush his teeth.
“Kei!” You nearly scream, clutching your chest to calm yourself down. “I’m using the bathroom here?”
“I can see,” he says, and you groan, throwing your head back in defeat. It really doesn’t help that the mirror is perfectly placed, in a way that allows your Kei to look at you directly in the eye while you sit on the toilet looking as unflattering as ever.
“Then leave? I can’t even piss in peace.”
“Why would I leave?” He puts the toothbrush in his mouth, “I’ve seen worse.”
“It’s impossible to argue with you,” you cry. And you’re right. Tsukishima Kei is insufferable, and he may be too comfortable with you already.
-
You learn Tsukishima has no sense of personal space soon after.
When he loves someone, his affection comes in odd ways. Sometimes it’s a flick to the forehead, other times it’s a teasing remark, and today, it’s him asking you if he could stay with you while you shower.
It’s not necessary the worst request, but when you consider the fact that he’s asking to sit on a stool and talk to you while you bathe, you find it a bit strange.
“Why would you even want that?” You ask him, all while you get ready for your nighttime shower.
“I just wanna be there.”
You shrug, tell him “sure”, and move on with your day. He sits on the toilet seat as you shower, recounting his day and all the small things that ticked him off.
“I never knew you could talk this much,” you laugh. He’s not necessarily the most quiet partner, but words are often few when it comes to your Kei. He’s more of a listener than anything, telling you how much he likes to hear your voice when you “bitch about everything.” (His words, not yours.)
-
Once you spend enough time with Tsukishima, though, you learn that he’s not evasive, just caring. He cares for you in ways you’ve never been loved before.
He shows you this when you feel as if you’re looking the Grim Reaper in the eyes, period cramps eating you away, and laying in your shared bed.
“Get up,” he whispers, careful to not yell for he knows how much you hate loud noises.
“Don’t talk to me.”
He knows it’s the cramps talking, so he only responds with a roll of his eyes.
“Okay,” he says, and begins to lift you off the bed. You nearly scream in shock, hitting his chest lightly.
“Put me down!” You kick your legs as he carries you bridal-style towards the bathroom. You know what he’s doing, trying to motivate you to not wallow in your pain, but you’re far too stubborn and in too much pain to care.
“Don’t ignore me!”
“You told me not to talk to you,” he retorts, gently placing you on the closed toilet seat and kneeling in front of you. “I ran a bath for you.”
You stare at him, head tilted to the side, and you wonder how you got so damn lucky.
“You want me to strip you, or?” He speaks up in the midst of your silence.
“Don’t be an ass.”
“That’s what I do best,” he smiles, lifting your hands up to remove your shirt (it’s his, really) from your body.
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saintpavlov · 2 months
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he doesn't mean to make you sad, you know that. it's just that, when atsumu's upset it becomes everyone's problem—yours especially.
you don't know how it starts. atsumu had been bouncing off the walls just a moment ago, drunk off of booze and the afterglow of victory. you don't know which one of his teammates had invited her to the after-party, just that right now, you can't help but hate them.
it's just for a second, but you catch it. the way his eyes immediately dim, how his hand falters around yours. you don't want to jump to conclusions, but it's obvious—atsumu's in love with her. painfully so.
he drops your hand as if burnt and turns away, letting himself be carried off into another conversation. atsumu laughs loud enough to be heard over the music, a deafening house mix that thuds through your chest like a second heartbeat. anyone else might not spare him a second glance, but you know that when atsumu laughs that loud there's something he's trying to hide. then, as if remembering that you're still there, atsumu turns over his shoulder. you answer before he can ask the question.
"no no, go ahead. go have fun!"
atsumu tilts his head, though you know he's only asking to be polite. "are you sure?"
you smile. "no worries."
it's a bold-faced lie, but atsumu's never been that good at paying attention. he returns your smile with an excited nod, letting himself be led away by the shoulders. "don't go anywhere!" he shouts, though you know later on he'll forget to come find you. that's the way it always is. always has been.
you nurse your drink against your chest—water, you don't have the stomach tonight—and try to look on the bright side, if there is one. atsumu had been the one to invite you, hadn't he? and though you're still "just friends", he'd held your hand earlier, so that has to count for something, right?
it's useless. you down your water in one go, figuring that if you treat it like alcohol it might work like it is. it doesn't, and now you're alone at this party with an empty cup and an even emptier hand.
you sigh and snake your way out of the kitchen, making your way up the stairs to the first door that opens. the upstairs is off-limits, but you hope that whoever owns this room is drunk enough to be forgiving. you don't even bother to turn on the lights, and instead flop backwards onto the bed. you feel the music downstairs rather than hearing it, a steady thump-thump-thump that shakes through you from head to toe.
you close your eyes, trying very hard not to think about atsumu and the girl he's still in love with downstairs. it's not your place to be bothered, that you know, but something in your chest still aches at the thought. you've loved atsumu since before he met her, after all. it's a shame he hasn't noticed. or maybe he's not noticing on purpose, which is considerably worse.
"woe is me," you say to no one, your voice biting with sarcasm. you're not shocked at how things are turning out, moreso that you thought it'd turn out any differently. with a sigh, you close your eyes. atsumu will find you eventually. and if he doesn't, then someone else will. you'd rather be cursed at for trespassing than anywhere downstairs, faking a smile as you wait for atsumu like a well-trained dog. at least here you can lick your wounds in private.
you don't know how much time has passed when you feel something press into your side, warm and solid. arms wrap around you: one slung over your waist, the other snaking its way under your head. you turn in confusion, seeing nothing in the dark.
whoever's holding you down reeks heavily of liquor, and their arm feels like a dead weight around you. when you try to pull it off they hold onto you tighter, mumbling something incoherent under their breath. "um, hey," you say loudly, voice hoarse with sleep. "get off of me."
the person beside you stirs, and the bed dips slightly as they prop themselves up. they mumble your name under their breath, and in the dark you can make out the vague outline of a face.
with a start, you realize you recognize that voice. "...osamu?"
he lies back down, bringing you along with him. "h-hey," you start to protest, but osamu's grip grows stronger in response.
"don't leave," he mumbles, as you try to sit up.
"but—"
"m'head hurts. shhh." osamu shushes you, curling up against your side. his hair tickles the side of your reddening cheek.
"hey, osamu." you try to move out from under his arm again, to no avail. "you're really drunk."
"and?" he counters, pulling you closer, almost possessively. "just pretend for a little while."
that catches you off guard. "pretend?"
"it's dark, so it's easier," osamu refuses to elaborate. "c'mon. it's my birthday."
"osamu, your birthday's in october."
"is it?" there's an uncharacteristic cheekiness to osamu's voice, one that makes you turn your head towards him in surprise. you can't see him, but you can tell from the warmth that his face is only inches away. "well it's somebody's birthday, somewhere."
something touches your cheek—osamu's hand? no, his face. somewhere near his chin, guessing by the stubble that scratches your skin. "just do me a favor and pretend i'm him," osamu says, and in that moment he sounds scarily sober.
"wh-what?" you can't help the way your mouth hangs open at the request, your stomach feeling like it's about to drop out of you.
"you heard me," osamu mumbles, back to being drunk again. "pretend i'm him. you know what i mean."
"you—what—that's not—"
"am i wrong?" osamu presses, raising his voice like he's imitating his brother. it works. osamu's fingers trace across your face, reading the shock on your face like braille. you turn your head and press your nose to his neck—no cologne, only the soft smell of skin. it can't be atsumu, but for a moment, you're fooled.
osamu tilts his head and sighs, slow and sweet. and when his lips brush your forehead, it's like everything you've ever dreamed. "i'm right," he breathes, nestling his head against your shoulder. it's not a question anymore, but a fact. "i'm right," he sing-songs, still painfully drunk.
"osamu—"
a hand covers your mouth, warm and firm. softer than atsumu's, and just a bit bigger. "don't say my name like that," he whispers, his voice hot against the shell of your ear, "say it the way you say his."
you swallow an audible gulp. "osa—osamu?" you try again.
osamu shakes his head. needy hands pull you in by the waist. you feel osamu's lips kiss up the side of your neck. "not like that," he murmurs.
"o-osa...mu..." you're breathless and dizzy. you feel osamu's smile against the underside of your jaw.
"better," he grins, and this time, his lips find yours.
it ends before you can even react. osamu pulls away with a shaky exhale, as if he's slowly waking from a dream. his eyes shine back at you in the dark, wide and unblinking.
he opens his mouth to speak. "i—"
"you're drunk," you say immediately, and push him away by the chest.
osamu doesn't let you. he brings his hands over yours and keeps them there, and under the thin cotton of his shirt you feel his heart beating rabbit-fast. "so? i'll still want you when i'm sober."
his words choke your own out of your throat. "osamu...i can't—"
"so don't. don't do anything. just stay the night." there's a desperation in his words that makes your stomach flip. osamu holds onto you like he's afraid to let go. "please."
it's late, and you're tired. atsumu's in love with someone that isn't you, but osamu's arms are warm enough to make you forget. you think to yourself: is it selfish if he's willing? are you cruel for wanting to pretend?
you wrap your arms around his neck and osamu relaxes, melting into you the same way butter does on toast. he's soft, comforting. familiar, but not the same. osamu's lips brush on your neck again and the impact shudders through your spine like electricity. he takes his hands and rubs them over your arms, thinking that you're cold. you don't want to tell him that in reality you're burning up, feeling hot everywhere he touches.
"thank you," osamu murmurs into your hair.
"for what?"
"stayin'."
and when osamu kisses you a second time, you don't have the heart to push him away.
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slut4msby · 3 months
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work wife. sawamura daichi x reader
+ tags & warnings; slightly suggestive towards the end if u like really squint & not proofread :p
+ a/n; i think as a society we should stop sleeping on daichi because like LOOK AT HIM (writing this makes me think i just have a thing for hq captains.)
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“Hey Babe, who’s texting you? Your phones like blowing up.” You ask your husband who is standing in the kitchen as he prepares a snack for the two of you. 
“Hm? Probably Suga or something. Just check.” He states. You follow his instructions, picking up his phone to see the notifications. His background is a photo of the two of you on your honeymoon, it was his favourite photo of the two of you. Constantly showing it off to everyone, bragging about how lucky it is. “So… who is it?” 
“Someone called, ‘Tsutsui Yasu’. Who’s that, Daichi?” 
Your husband can’t help but roll his eyes at the name. “That woman from work. The one who keeps calling herself my ‘work wife’. The one that will never leave me alone, you know?”
“Oh her.” You giggle, “didn’t realise she was THIS obsessed with you. Can’t really blame her though. You look REALLY good in your work uniform, Dai.”
“I thought I always looked good, Y/N.” He teases, resuming to his seat next to you on the couch. You can’t help but roll your eyes at his comment. “What’s she saying?” He asked taking a bite of his sandwich.
“She sent you a video of some cats and just said ‘us lol’.” You explained, “and then she sent some more stupid posts and stuff.”
“God, I never open any of those. They are always so stupid. I only like stupid posts when they come from you, princess.” He says in between bites.
“Hey Dai, can I come visit you for lunch at work tomorrow. I want to meet my replacement, your ‘work wife’.” You say before picking up the sandwich your husband had made you.
“Of course, I'd never say no to that.”
The next morning you begin packing Daichi’s lunch for him, an assortment of his favourite foods. As the clock hits 12, you decide to head over to the station where Daichi works. As you walk in you see an assortment of people walking around looking busy, you decide to stand off to the side and text your husband upon your arrival. 
As you face down at your phone, you hear someone approach you. Slowly looking up at making eye contact at a shorter woman, a hand on her hip. “Can I help you?” She asked a seamlessly innocent question but the tone was laced with a taste of bitterness. Before you could answer you see the familiar sight of your husband approaching the two of you. Daichi was giving you a look, telepathically telling you to not say or do anything stupid. As his footsteps got louder, the woman in front of you snapped her head around to look at your husband. “Sawamura-kun! Hey.” She smiles, a drastic contrast to the look she was giving you.
“Oh hey, Tsutsui-san.” He says before turning to you, “hey baby.”
The sentence confused Tsutsui, before she could react you pull your husband in for a hug. “Hey Dai,” you mutter into his chest, “I brought lunch.” You smiled looking up at him.
“Oh, Daichi-san? Who’s this?” Tsutsui asks, looking towards your husband completely shutting out your presence.
“This is my wife, Y/N.” He proudly responds.
“Hey, I am Sawamura Y/N.” You say with a fake smile plastered over your face, putting a hand out for Tsutsui which she ignores.
“Tsutsui Yasu. Daichi’s work wife.” She states bluntly.
“Oh! I have heard about you! Are you the Tsutsui Yasu who wont stop blowing up my husband's phone every night? The one my husband shows complete disinterest in and keeps following him around like a lost puppy. The Tsutsui who doesn’t stop referring to herself as my husband's work wife, despite his discomfort. And despite the ring he wears on his finger, that Tsutsui right?”
The conversation drops silent. The tension in the air grows strong. Daichi shifts uncomfortably between the two of you, glancing at the both of you. 
Tsutsu was taken aback by your directness, stammers “I-I… well, Daichi and I have a great working relationship! We just joke around, you know?”
“Y/N.” Daichi says sternly, “let’s just go have some lunch-”
“Listen Dai, I love you and we can go eat in a second.” You cut him off, Daichi was amazed by your new found dominance, he was used to you being a nice, caring and loving partner. But he liked it, he liked how you weren’t afraid to fight for him in the moment. Daichi always cared too much about how other people viewed him and would never say something to hurt another person, he could never find the guts to tell Tsutsui to stop caring too much about her emotions. Daichi was a people pleaser. 
By this time, you werent; letting anyone undermine your relationship. You fix your gaze firmly on Tsutsui, your tone unwavering. "Tsutsui-san, it's about time you understand boundaries. Daichi is my husband, and your 'work wife' fantasy isn't something he's interested in."
Daichi looks at you with a mixture of surprise and admiration, silently appreciating your assertiveness. Tsutsui, however, seems taken aback by the direct confrontation.
You continue, "I get it, Daichi is friendly with everyone at work, but your constant intrusion into our personal life's crosses a line. We're here to enjoy lunch, not to entertain your fixation on being his 'work wife.'"
Tsutsui was lost for words. Not knowing how to apply to your directness. 
Daichi steps in, his tone firm, "Tsutsui-san, I appreciate your friendship at work, but Y/N is my priority. Please respect that."
“Let’s go, Dai.” You say walking off, leaving a dumbfounded Tsutsui standing there. Daichi trails behind you.
“That was hot, princess.” Daichi says placing a kiss on your forehead once the two of you reach your car. 
“Mhm, I like fighting for what’s mine.” You murmured against his lips, before he pulled you closer. 
A playful glint sparkles in Daichi's eyes as he holds you close. "You should do it more often," he says, a teasing smile playing on his lips.
“Maybe I will.”
©slut4msby.
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missmeinyourbones · 1 year
Text
SIMPLE COMPLICATION, MISCOMMUNICATION
cw: arguments aren’t fun :( suna is bad at communicating :( reader is frustrated and a tad insecure :( angst to fluff tho i swear, i was mad so i took it out on paper (and on rintaro)
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The small crack of light creeping through your curtain feels equivalent to the burn of a hangover. 
The clock reads a reasonable almost ten in the morning, but your body dismisses the concept of time and aches for twelve more hours of sleep. You barely slept last night, tossing and turning for hours on end, all because of your stupid boyfriend. 
Suna’s terrible at communicating, no matter how many times you tell him. He’s human, prone to making mistakes and having his fair share of wheels that need greasing, but his avoidant communication skills are often the core of a handful of your arguments.
This time around, he’s been away for the week traveling with EJP—and while the travel is nothing new, you’ve only received a single phone call and four texts within the past week. 
Waking up with a pounding headache, you instantly groan at the thought of pulling yourself out of bed. Rintaro won't be home for another day, which means another night of no sleep and spiraling worry. 
At this point, coffee may be your only saving grace.
Trudging into your kitchen with knotted hair and morning breath, you barely even open your eyes as you mindlessly navigate your way to the savior that is your coffee machine. 
However, your apartment isn't as empty as you left it last night. 
“Yikes,” an unsuspecting yet familiar voice practically wheezes at your appearance. “You look like you slept well,” the voice oozes of nothing but sarcasm and instigation. 
Cracking open a tired and cranky eye, you see him through blurry vision. He’s comfortable on the couch, phone placed on the coffee table and hands on his knees as he sits up, now knowing that you’re awake. 
He looks good, and as relieved as you are to know he’s back home safe, you don’t have it in you to be merrily surprised. 
“Why’re you here?” you growl. 
Rintaro bites the inside of his cheek. He’s not too surprised at your cold greeting, but winces all the same at your harsh tone. 
“Ouch,” his hand covers his chest in hurt. “Is that any way to greet your sexy boyfriend first thing in the morning after he’s been away?”
“When I’m pissed at him, yes,” you snap with a burning annoyance. You sound tired, and Suna ignores the ache in his chest that knows it’s because of him. 
Standing quickly and making his way toward you, his eyes follow your every move. You walk by him without so much as a glance and make your way over to the coffee machine. Turning it on, you sigh against the counter and wait for it to warm up. 
“What are you doing here, Suna?” 
His breath catches in his throat, “Suna? Since when was I demoted?” 
He must have been slowly inching himself towards you, because he now stands beside you in the kitchen. He moves to press a kiss to your temple—testing out the waters—but you immediately step away and hold up a hand that wordlessly tells him to back off. He makes a mental note of the silent message. Sailor’s warning, rocky seas ahead. 
“I’m serious,” your eyes remain locked on the coffee machine whirring before you.
“So am I. Suna?” he tries again. His nails scratch at his stubbly jaw in thought, “Nope, never heard of him. Don’t know who that is.”
As if your tone isn’t clear enough that you're unimpressed with his antics, the scowl on your face solidifies any leftover room for interpretation. 
There’s no point in playing along with his games, so you fold. “Maybe that's because he’s been away for almost a week and has barely responded to any of my texts.”
Rintaro exhales. And there it is. 
The reason you’re giving him the cold shoulder after a week of being apart. The reason he wasn't met with the comforting weight of your frame jumping into his arms and a kiss filled with enough love to feed an army. The reason you didn’t answer his last three texts of:
surprise!!! trip ended a day early. boarding rn, can’t wait to see you :P
landed safe and omw, love u <3 
here so wake up and let me love you :/ coward
Rintaro inhales. It’s all making sense now. 
“Huh,” he frowns, “he sounds like a dick.”
You look him in the eye for the first time this morning and it sends an instant chill up his spine. A cold glare of anger and exhaustion and hurt. 
Suna doesn’t like it one bit. He loathes it, especially when it's directed at him. He decides that this has gone on long enough. 
He wraps an arm around your shoulder in an attempt to pull you into his chest. “C’mere, I’m sorry. My schedule’s been crazy.”
You resist, but not enough to actually mean it, so he holds your head in place against his chest. 
Noticing you're not yet hugging him back, he mumbles the confirmation into your hair, “Today’s practice got canceled. M’all yours.”
And suddenly, as if he’s been balancing on a wavering piece of glass and finally applied too much pressure on a crack, the panel shatters and you're pulling away from his hold with a shaky sigh. 
“I’m not in the mood to be your second choice today.”
The apartment falls silent, aside from the comedic timing of your coffee machine deciding to start drizzling the dark liquid into your ceramic mug. Your confession (followed by the deafening silence that shows no sign of you taking back your words) makes him swallow down the bile quickly rising in his throat.  
“Baby,” he breathes, voice now devoid of all airy humor it was laced with a few moments ago, “that’s not even funny. M’done with the bit now, c’mon.”
“I’m serious,” you snap, and the step Rintaro takes forward is frozen mid-stride.
“I haven’t seen you in days, barely talked to you. You said you would tell me when you landed safely in Brazil and you never did. You left almost half of my texts on delivered when I was only checking in on you, and—” 
“Shit, I know,” his voice comes out harsher than he means it to, and when the coffee machine turns off and makes his outburst all the more sour, he makes a mental note to break it later. 
The look of shock that flashes across your face is gone before he can address it, but it was there and now he’s afraid he’s going to see it every time he so much as closes his eyes.  
His tone is softer the second time around, “I know, and I’m sorry.” 
He thinks about taking another step closer to you, but the tears of frustration threatening to slip from your lash line tell him not to. So he keeps his distance and tries to speak as calmly as he can.  
“It’s been hard for me, too. Fuckin’ coach keeps changing the dates around on us, but when I’m not playing, I’m eating or sleeping. That’s all, you know that—”
“It’s not about that,” you coldly cut him off, upset that he’d even insinuate something as foolish as infidelity. That’s not where your mind was, and you both know that. 
Your head falls into your hands as your elbows rest against the chilly countertop. “That's your job, I know what is signed up for.”
He watches you close your eyes in disappointment and (what he knows to be) embarrassment, “But I worry, and I know that you know that.”
He doesn't miss the crack in your voice and the way it instantly creates a crack in his heart. He continues to watch, helplessly, as you bare yourself to him beneath the crumbling pressure.  
“And when you don’t answer, it makes me feel like I’m annoying you, like you don't want to talk to me. And if that’s the case, then maybe you shouldn’t have to deal with me being clingy and insecure and—”
“Yeah, stopping you right there,” he crudely interrupts, pulling your now malleable frame into his arms.
He coos at your shaky inhales against his chest, and it makes you feel like a wounded child. “You could never annoy me,” he promises.
And you know he means it, no matter how frustrating these past six days have been for you. 
“I’m sorry I blow at communicating,” his voice weaves in and out of your ears as he whispers into the crown of your head, “but please know that even when I’m busy and exhausted and practically a fucking zombie, I still want to talk to you. Always do.”
You believe him. It doesn't make it hurt any less, but you believe him. 
“Well, do a better job of showing it,” you mumble against his sweatshirt. It’s weak, but it’s there.
His hand finds your back, drawing mindless circles and pushing you further into his hold. As if you’ll slip out of his grasp like a bag in the wind if he's not cautious enough with you.
“Anything for you, baby.”
He holds you there for a moment, and the kitchen is filled with nothing but the sound of your sniffly breathing and the smell of steaming hazelnut. 
Eventually, his voice comes quiet, muffled from the crook of your neck as it vibrates your skin. 
“Do you really think I put my work before you?” 
“No,” your response is immediate because it’s true, “I don’t. I just missed you, Rintaro.”
You bite your tongue when you feel his smirk against your skin, and its not a second before he’s pulling away and you see it on his face. “Rintaro, huh?” 
You roll your eyes and go to push him off of you, but he’s too fast. His quick reflexes come in handy as his fingers catch your wrist mid-shove.
“Come on, just a little more, gimme what I wanna hear.”
“No,” your stubbornness wins as you twist your wrist in his palm. 
“Please, baby,” he begs without hesitation. “Just shorten it a few letters. S’all I wanna hear.”
“You’re annoying me.”
“I have a week’s worth of annoying you to catch up on,” he easily retorts.
Amid your bickering, Rintaro has backed you up against the counter, pinning you beneath his weight as he childishly slumps on top of you.
“You’re heavy,” he feels you groan.
“I beg your pardon?”
“Get off, Rin.”
His heart instantly swells at the sweet name falling from your lips, and his grin mirrors the internal organ as it grows three times in size. 
“There it is,” he coos as you try to shrug his hands away from cradling your face. You roll your eyes, but your smile is evident. “There she is, my pretty girl.”
You let him press his lips to yours, and while you tell yourself it to shut him up, you’d be a liar if you said that was the only reason. He tastes like the drugstore cherry chapstick he uses and the cinnamon gum he chewed on the plane ride home. 
“Missed you,” he presses another sweet kiss to your lips, “I love you.”
You swallow his words without remorse. “Love you too.”
He lifts you onto the countertop and laughs when you jump at the cold granite on your exposed skin. Next to your now lukewarm coffee, he picks up the mug with one hand and carefully passes it to you. He watches you take a sip, and hums into the beverage when you hold it up to his own mouth and let him have a taste. 
Between brushing noses and coffee-tasting kisses, he breathes. “Wanna help me unpack?” 
On command, your eyes roll. “You’re on thin ice, Rin.”
He wouldn't have it any other way, so he shrugs into your neck. “Good thing I know how to skate.”
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tetsumie · 7 months
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“𝐘𝐎𝐔’𝐑𝐄 𝐒𝐎 𝐂𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐆𝐘” — 𝐏𝐓 𝟐
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read part 1 here!
pairing: kuroo x reader & kenma x reader
genre: hurt/comfort
a/n: hello !! sorry for being gone for soooo long D: i wasn’t doing well and was in a really bad place mentally.. (plus burnout 😓😓) but regardless tysm for all the love in the first part of this fic! i appreciate u all sm and i’ll work on getting asks in! thank u for being so patient w me !! luv u :D
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kuroo tetsuro
you woke up late today and weren't surprised that kuroo had already left for work by the time you woke up. but he did leave you a post-it note saying he made breakfast leftovers for you in the fridge.
you smile at the thought that kuroo took the time out of his day to make some food especially in the morning. however, as you're getting ready for the day, your eye catches the lunch bag that's sitting on the kitchen bar countertop.
"this idiot," you mumble, shaking your head with a smile on your face. you pull out your phone and shoot him a text.
y/n: thanks for the breakfast it was really good
tetsu: im glad :)
y/n: also you left your lunch at home stupid
tetsu: oh shit
tetsu: can you drop it off for me? i cant come home to pick up, im in a meeting rn
y/n: yeah that's fine
tetsu: thanks baby ill kiss u when i see u
tetsu: love u 2 the moon and back !!
y/n: ur so weird
y/n: love u 2 the moon and back <3
a few hours pass by and now you're taking the bus to head to kuroo's office with his lunch bag in hand. before leaving the house, you decided to swap his current lunch which was some leftovers with his favorite food, grilled salted mackerel.
you enter his office floor and are greeted by the office receptionist from the floor. "i'm just here to drop off some food for kuroo-san."
"oh yes, right this way," she stands up and opens the office door for you and points out where his room is.
as you're about to knock on his door, you hear his voice from the other side. "i'm not sure if i can come out tonight to eat kenma. y/n probably wants me home, you know how clingy they get sometimes."
your heart sinks to the floor.
has he always thought of me this way? clingy? i didn't mean to act that way? i just like being in his company. i didn't mean to be clingy. i didn't know he felt that way...
"anyways, i'll call you back kenma. i gotta get back to work. see ya later" he ends the call.
you take a deep breath, standing in front of the door, thinking about kuroo's words to his best friend. before you could even knock, the door opens and you're greeted by kuroo.
"oh y/n! you should've texted me you were here!"
you let out a laugh that sort of dies in your throat. "oh um i just wanted to surprise you that's all."
"come in, let's eat together. you can see the beautiful downtown view from here," he tries to usher you inside his personal office room.
you're a little uncomfortable so you hold yourself back from going on, "maybe another time, yeah? i gotta head back. i've got a lot of work to do with college and work and stuff."
"no yeah of course, i get it. work hard! but first..." kuroo smiles and before you can pull away, he kisses you on the head. "i'll see you when i get home. love you!"
too ashamed to even look at him as you walked out of his office, you just wave to him with your back facing him as you walked away.
you're now sitting on the bus on the way home, thinking about the way he called you clingy. "you know how clingy they get.." has he always thought i'm clingy? has he just been putting up with my annoying habits? i thought he liked the way i treated him. i didn't know he thought it was clingy.
you're trying to look back at your actions and now it's all coming back to you.
you're always trying to kiss him, hug him, cuddle him. you're always talking to him about random things from an occurrence at the grocery store to some new show you're watching. literally last night, you both were cuddling while watching a new episode of kuroo's favorite sit-com and you were running your fingers through his hair.
it all made sense.
you were clingy.
and he wanted space.
you were going to respect that.
kuroo comes home later that evening and announces himself with an "i'm home!"
you're on the dining table with the computer open, working on some new assignment and you smile at him. "welcome home," you say with a smile.
he's expecting you to get up and come over and hug him like you usually do but to his surprise, you continue to look back at your computer.
he assumes you're just busy and doesn't think much of it.
kuroo heads into the shared bedroom to unwind from his hectic day at work. he takes a shower and changes into some pajama pants and is now heading back to the living room to see what you're up to.
you're still sitting on the dining table with all your notebooks splayed out and computer open, working on what seems to be some really big project. he plops down next to you and starts squinting at the screen. he starts poking you to grab your attention from the screen.
"the mackerel was really good today."
"that's good."
silence envelops the atmosphere between the both of you until kuroo decides to speak again.
"what are you working on?"
"college stuff."
"maybe take a break now?" he suggests.
"i can't. it's due soon," your voice flat. "if you want dinner, there's some leftovers i made in the fridge."
"alright," he replies, getting up from the chair to the kitchen to warm up some food.
his shoulders droop a little. he was hoping to spend some time with you. but he is aware that something is off with you. he's not sure what it is but he knows something isn't right. you haven't given him a single kiss or even a hug since he's been back and your usual sarcastic remarks are gone.
you've barely even acknowledged his presence.
"maybe it's just an off day?" is what he convinces himself.
but those "off days" are starting to become more consistent.
you're out of bed before he wakes up in the morning and you barely talk to him when he comes home. you always end up sleeping after he falls asleep and he can't even stay up because of how exhausted he gets after work. the amount of physical affection has declined from you and every time he texts or talks to you, your replies are barely existent.
it feels like he's living by himself. when did it get so cold?
on the other hand, you think it's going well! you haven't been all up in his business lately. you're giving him the space he wants. you're hoping that kuroo is feeling much happier since you're smothering him less. sure, you miss getting to hold and cuddle him but this is what he wanted, right?
now that the week is over, kuroo is hoping to spend the weekend with you.
that morning, kuroo sets an alarm to wake up earlier than you in hopes of spending some extra affectionate time with you. however, the moment he wakes up, the other side of the bed is empty and cold.
he has no choice but to get out of bed to see where you are. there's no way you're up right now. at 7 am on a weekend? no way.
he walks out of the room and he feels his heart chip. you're sleeping on the couch, slightly shivering because the blanket you're using barely covers you. have you been sleeping on the couch this past week? why didn't i notice? kuroo begins to internally berate himself right now for letting you sleeping on the couch for this past week right under his nose.
with no hesitation, he bridal-style carries you back into the shared bedroom and tucks you under the duvet cover and comes back into bed.
however, you've already woken up and you sit up on the bed, startled. "w-what? where am i?"
he scoffs, "i brought you in our bedroom idiot."
"oh," you're now grabbing your stuff and climbing out to go back to the couch but kuroo stops you by grabbing your arm.
"where are you going?"
"to the couch?"
"but this is our bedroom?"
"no, this is your bedroom," you emphasize.
"y/n." his tone feels cold to you. "talk to me."
"we are talking, are we not?"
he starts scratching the back of his neck. "yes but you know it's not the same. what's going on baby?"
his hand to tries to reach your cheek to stroke it with his thumb but you turn away and immediately stand up from his bed. "it's okay kuroo, please go back to sleep. it's the weekend, you should rest."
his heart chips at the gesture. why are you avoiding him like this? what did he do? what happened to 'tetsu?'
"it's tetsu to you," he mumbles.
you open your mouth but shut it and cast you eyes away from his stare down at the floor.
"it's always been tetsu to you," he states.
you're still silent and he takes it as his queue to continue speaking.
"baby, everyday i come home from work and you barely acknowledge me. you're always busy doing 'college stuff' or something else. you barely hug me or even kiss me anymore. what happened? what did i do? did i do something wrong? did i overstep my boundaries? are you mad at me about something? please i wanna know what i did wrong so i can fix myself."
your heart softens at his words and you begin to immediately reassure him.
"there's nothing wrong with you... nothing has ever been wrong with you... i just want to work on giving you your space. i know that you think i'm clingy and so i wanted to work on just giving you room to breathe. i know i can be a little too much sometimes. i'm sorry for not realizing how clingy my actions were sooner. i'm sorry i-"
he immediately walks over to you and brings you to his chest, hugging you tightly. your eyes slightly widen. "don't you dare fucking apologize. it's not your fault. shit, it's never been your fault, baby. what made you even think that?"
in embarrassment, you mumble, "i heard you say i'm clingy to kenma. sorry i didn't mean to overhear."
"oh, my love," he pulls away and looks at you with a sad look in his eyes. "it's not what you think."
he sighs and he sits on the side of the bed and taps the bed space in front of him for you to sit down as well. "kenma's been trying to get me to go meet some new volleyball members to affiliate them with the jva and to be honest, i already have so much on my plate with the current affiliates, that i'm really trying to avoid going out for dinner with him. i'm trying to get one of my coworkers to go on my behalf to seal the deal but i can't find anyone willing to."
"i just used your name as an excuse. i swear on my life, i never really meant that. i never ever meant to hurt you."
still finding it hard to believe him, you mumble, "you don't need to lie.. i understand if-"
"y/n, i swear on my mother, i'm not lying," he interrupts. "every single fucking day, the only think i ever look forward to is seeing your beautiful face in my apartment. i look forward to your rambles about the new show you started watching or how the current professor you're shadowing is a douche. i love your bear hugs and i love the way you kiss me all over my face in the mornings. fuck, i love knowing that i get to go to sleep with you every night and i get to wake up to you every morning. i love you, just the way you are. please don't ever change yourself over some fucking lie i said."
"i'm so sorry y/n, so sorry for ever making you doubt my love for you," he intertwines his hand in yours and looks into your eyes. "i'll do anything to regain your trust.
he senses the hesitation in your eyes and honestly, he can't blame you. you've been harboring this guilt for a week and it makes sense that you're still feeling a little uncomfortable around him.
but to his surprise, you inch your way closer to him and hug his chest and the tears begin to fall. his body tenses and he feels so guilty about everything. he rubs reassuring circles on your back and kisses your head every few moments.
after you wipe your tears on his shirt, you look up at him and honestly kuroo hates to admit this but you still look gorgeous even with a tear stained face. he's grinning at you and begins to pepper your face with his kisses.
"love you to the moon and back," he whispers into your ear.
you chuckle and kiss him on the lips. "love you to the moon and back, tetsu."
in that moment, he swears to himself that he'll make sure that you never have to doubt his love for you ever again.
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kozume kenma
as the ceo of his own startup company, a youtube streamer, and a college student, kenma can almost never find any time to himself. the only time he really feels at peace is either when he's asleep or when he's with you.
but sometimes things get so hectic and suffocating, he just wants to be alone, away from the world.
after a long day of classes, you walk into your shared apartment and you can hear kenma talking from his bedroom/home office. you try to keep quiet not disturbing him.
in hopes of cheering him up, you decide what better way to do so by making his favorite food: apple pie. you put down your stuff on the living room couch, grab the apron, and get to work.
kenma stays locked up in his bedroom for the majority of time that you're baking and a part of you just hopes that maybe he'll come out to just say "hi" or just accompany you to see what you're up to but unfortunately he doesn't.
after the pie is done baking in the oven and you've brought him a slice so he can get some food in his system because you're sure he hasn't been taking care of himself. you're hoping that maybe, just maybe, the both of you will finally get to spend some time together.
you knock on the door twice.
no response.
you knock once more and call out his name, "kenma, you busy still?"
still no response.
you sigh, realizing there was no hope in knocking, and decide to twist the knob and enter his room. you're greeted with the sight of him sitting on his gaming chair, knees to his chest, headphones over his ears, and slightly biting the eraser top of his pencil.
he must have felt the presence of someone else in the room with him because he looked away from his computer screen and his eyes widened. he slid his headphones off his ear and hung them around his neck.
"how long have you been home?" he bluntly asks.
"for an hour or two now, i think," you reply.
“oh sorry, i didn’t see you,” he mumbles.
you chuckle in response. “i didn’t think you would considering you’ve been cooped up in your room the entire time.”
“well yeah,” he says. “i’m busy.”
as he’s about to put his headphones back on and get back to work, you speak up. “i know you’re busy but do you wanna eat with me? i made-”
“can we talk later? i don’t have time for your clinginess right now.”
oh.
he puts his headphones on and indulges himself back in his work, not even registering the weight of his words.
you slowly walk out of his room, silently close the door, grab yourself a slice of apple pie originally made for the both of you, and plop yourself on the couch to watch some new show on the television.
after working for nearly hours on end, kenma finally finishes the load of work he had piled. now all he wants to do is just spend some time with you before going to bed. he walks out of the bedroom and is greeted by you asleep with the television humming in the background.
he can't help but let a small smile envelop his features. it's such a domestic sight and he wants to photograph this moment in time.
he knows he said some harsh words to you out of frustration but he hopes that you understand that he didn’t truly mean them.
he goes over and kisses your forehead and he smells the distinctive scent of apple pie and his heart softens at the thought that you made him his favorite food.
he goes over to his bedroom, grabs a blanket and lays it over you and goes under the blanket, snuggling himself closer to you. he hasn't felt this relaxed in a while and your presence is just so comforting to him.
he doesn't know what he'd do without you.
the next morning, you wake up and find yourself in an awkward position and your feel arms wrapped around your torso. you look to your left and are greeted by kenma's sleeping figure and you can't help but smile.
but you remind yourself of what he told you yesterday and you silently get up from the couch and begin to get ready for the rest of your day.
his words, "i don't have time for your clinginess right now", really had sent you into a spiral last night and you were too exhausted to think clearly. did you always come off as clingy to him? you were definitely a bit more energetic and enthusiastic than him but you never thought it was clingy?
you can't seem to think straight so you decide to maybe go out for a walk, just to take your mind off things. you just need some time alone, away from your apartment with him.
kenma wakes up only a few minutes later and he feels cold. his neck is sore, considering how he slept in an uncomfortable position because he wanted to sleep with you. however, to his surprise, he doesn't find you asleep next to him.
as he walks around the house, calling your name, a sense of urgency begins to form in the pit of his stomach.
he dials your number and it goes to voicemail.
he does it again. still voicemail.
he's about to call you one more time until he hears the jangle of keys and the door opening. a sigh of relief leaves his mouth and as you're about to turn your keys to open the door, he's a step ahead of you, opening the door for you.
"oh my god, i thought you went missing," kenma hugs you, catching you by surprise. "where'd you go?"
hesitant to reply, you say, "oh just went on a walk, that's all."
"you should've told me, we could've gone together," he states. "i feel like we haven't seen each other in forever."
"it's fine. don't worry about it."
there's something wrong and he can sense it in your demeanor. as you're heading to the master bedroom, he can see the way your shoulders slump as you put your keys back. he doesn't address your distant behavior, thinking that you're just having a rough morning and it'll get better as the day goes on.
unfortunately, it doesn't get better.
you seem to be fine but you just feel incredibly distant.
kenma's been playing games in his room all day and unlike usual, you're not in his bedroom watching him play or sitting on the bed scrolling through your phone. his gaming experience isn't the same when you're not there.
he pauses his game and goes out to the living room to see you lying down on the couch, scrolling through videos on your phone. he wants to ask why you're not staying with him but he doesn't want to make overstep your boundaries, especially since it seems like you're not in a good mood.
but that's anything from what you want.
you want him to ask you to stay in his room and keep you company. but because he hasn't done so, his word "clingy" began to scream louder in your head and to be frank, that's the only thing roaming in your head.
"do you want to do anything today?" he asks. "you know.. because it's the weekend and we can go out if you want? like going out to eat?"
a part of you began to feel guilty considering he was thinking about what you wanted to do and you hated feeling like a burden towards him. he already expressed his disapproval with you when he said he found you clingy so you didn't want to impose any further.
"no it's okay," you reply, eyes glued to your phone. "i don't want to annoy you or anything.. so i'll just go on my own or something..."
he hums in response but his eyebrows furrow as he doesn't seem to move from his spot. he can tell there's something wrong and you're obviously being very dodgy with him about the subject which is why he decides to take a seat on the couch and snatch your phone from your hands before you can even register what's happened.
"hey give me back my phone!" you sit up, stretching yourself over to grab your phone back from him in a failed attempt.
"not until you tell me what's wrong," he says flat.
you sigh, knowing that this conversation isn't inevitable. you can't avoid him forever "you called me clingy yesterday, kenma. sorry that i don't really want to hang out with you right now."
the words that leave your mouth have kenma in a state of shock. you took that seriously? you really thought he meant that? in order to ease his busy day of meetings back to back, you came home baked him some apple pie to ease him from his stresses.
and what did he do in return? called you clingy when you just wanted to spend some well-deserved time with him. god, he was being so ungrateful. his body fills with guilt when he he realizes you took his comment to heart.
“honey, i-” he starts and then is cut off with your words.
"i understand where you were coming from, i like to show my affection with you through physical touch and i know you’ve never been one to really reciprocate that," you begin to ramble. "so i’m really sorry for pushing your boundaries and i’ll give you the space that you need."
guilt is eating him away and he needs to clear the air now, otherwise you might be closed off forever and he’s not sure if he’s ever going to be able to reconnect with you.
“y/n, honey, don't apologize for this. it’s not your fault at all,” he starts. he puts down the phone onto the couch and grabs both of your hands and squeezes them assuringly. “i'm sorry for pushing you away and calling you clingy. you didn't.. you never deserve to be told that."
his hand finds its way to your cheek and he begins to rub comforting slow circles. seeing the sullen look on your face made him realize that he never wants to see you like this ever again. it was like you had lost the light in your eyes. kenma hated how he had diminished that so quickly by making you think that he didn't like your company.
he loves you so much; he could never imagine what life would be like without your presence.
a small smile begins to creep back on to your face and kenma finds himself in a slight sense of relief.
"it's okay," you finally utter out. "do you wanna watch that new episode? apparently there is so much drama now and i'm avoiding socials so i don't get spoiled..."
he chuckles, "i'll do anything with you."
he knows that he can't take back his words from before but as he's sitting on the couch with you in his embrace, he knows he can show you his love through his actions. he'll do anything to bring back that trust to you.
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© tetsumie 2023 all rights reserved 
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salsakiyoomi · 9 months
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“so this is it? you’re just going to leave?” 
suna’s voice slightly breaks as he asks that question, he doesn’t know where he went wrong — when he went wrong for you to suddenly break up with him, like, for god’s sake, you've been dating for three years, what happened?
it hurts when you don’t answer, it hurts even more that you won’t meet his gaze with your face turned away from him, “come on, y/n, look at me.” he says pleadingly.
you don’t look at him, you’re not sure if it’s because you don’t want to see the desperate look in his eyes, or if it’s to hide the tears in your own, “i’m sorry, rin.” you say quietly, “this is just — it’s not working out, okay?”
“not working out?” he repeats back, his voice breaks again, “what do you mean? we’ve - we’ve been together for three years, we were happy, you were happy. what changed?”
the chilly december breeze blows against the two of you — you hug yourself as if seeking warmth, it was cold atop the rooftop of suna’s penthouse and you were starting to doubt if it was even a good idea to bring him up here for this.
you inhale in a shaky breath, “look, i just think we need a break, okay?” you don’t tell him it’s because you think he’s spending too much time at practice, or that it’s because he’s not giving you the attention you need, no more clinging to you on friday nights watching horror movies or that it’s because of the one too many nights out drinking with his friends and coming home with the overwhelming scent of a woman’s perfume completely engulfing him — you know suna would never cheat on you but the implication that he might’ve in the haze of the alcohol and the zero recollection in his hangover the next day leaves you doubting.
“a break? and then what? we’re just gonna get back together after you’re done cooling off?” the last part comes out a little harsher than he meant — he’s hurt, he doesn’t get it, you’re just going to leave with no reason whatsoever. 
he sighs, running a hand through his hair, “sorry, i…didn’t mean it like that.”
you still won’t look at him, and it hurts more than he would admit, “i just, i don’t get it.” he mumbles, almost like he’s talking to himself, “at least tell me why you’re leaving.” it comes out in a whisper, he doesn’t want to believe this is actually happening.
“i told you, rin, this just isn’t working out.” you say quietly, looking down on the city lights below, hugging your jacket — his jacket closer to yourself to keep your body warm as another harsh gust of wind blows.
he groans, “this isn’t a reason — come on, baby, we’re happy — ” he says but you cut him off “we were happy, rin. but this,” you finally turn around to look at him and gesture with your hand between the two of you — and suna doesn’t miss the tears brimming the corners of your eyes, “whatever this is now between us, this isn’t how we used to be — i just, i can’t do it anymore.” you say, your voice finally breaks, your cold resolve shattering.
“why?” he asks quietly, attempting to hold your gaze but you turn away from him, “i think you know why.” you murmur.
he doesn’t, he really doesn’t but he doesn’t think that there is a way to get you to back down from this anymore.
silence falls around the two of you like a heavy blanket that only makes the december night colder — he lets out a huff of air, turning around to look at the roof — the couch by the pool that the two of you used to sit by all the time, soft lips pressed against each other and sweet nothings whispered to one another, talking about a future the two of you would share as you got drunk on each other’s love.
he doesn’t think he can come back up here without thinking of you again.
“fine.” he finally says, breaking the silence, “if this is what you want then fine.”
he doesn’t mean that, he doesn’t want that — he wants to hold you in his arms and kiss you and tell you that he can fix this and that everything will be okay, he doesn’t want to let you go but he knows that he has to.
you nod your head, and you turn around to face him and he wonders if you’re hurt about this the same way he is.
“this is yours,” you mumble quietly as you begin to take off your jacket and he raises a hand to stop you, “keep it.” he says, “i don’t want it.” it’ll only remind him of you, as if everything else wouldn’t.
now it’s his turn to look away from you, he can’t bear it, the sight of you, your face or your hair or the blush that taints your cheeks from the cold or how pretty your lips look, knowing damn well that he won’t see you again.
you gulp and nod, “i’m sorry, suna.” he tries to ignore how much his heart aches when you use his last name, tries to ignore how his chest tightens when you actually walk past him and he catches a whiff of your perfume — the one you love so much, the one he loves so much.
the december cold is chilling when another gust of wind blows and you’re gone with his jacket and suna is left with an empty feeling in his chest.
he’s never getting the jacket back, or you for that matter.
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a/n : can be read as the prequel to this and is inspired by this drabble by @augustinewrites
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k0dzukeiji · 5 months
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𝐋𝐨𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐮𝐬𝐞 - 𝐒𝐮𝐧𝐚 𝐑𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐨
read pt 2 𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞
synopsis: you tried to warn him and he didn’t listen. that not only costed him a healthy relationship, but your friendship as well.
genre: angst, friends>nobodies
warnings: cursing, toxic relationship, friend breakups, fighting, suna is an asshole, reader has a crush on suna, regret, made up character is also a bitch, mentions of hell, NOT PROOF READ, PLEASE EXCUSD ANY MISTAKES OR TYPOS (i never proof read), mentions of vomit, probably ooc
wc: 3,220 (sleep deprived me really said 1k+ 💀)
taglist: @hissy-fit18 @ilovejujitsukaisen @misasdeathwish
a/n: I don’t know how I feel about this, kinda sucky but its not horrible considering i wrote it in 2 days without any prep
also imma just complain cause i kept switching to another keyboard while writing this and it was a pain in my ass
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
You and Suna, Rin to you, have been best friends since diapers. The two of you did EVERYTHING together, you even moved with him to Hyogo after he got scouted. You and him were inseparable; Keyword were.
It all started when he met Sato Rei a beautiful girl with an ugly personality. He almost immediately warmed up to her and though you should’ve been happy, you weren’t. It’s not that you were unhappy that he was friends with another girl, never would you be unhappy about that. It’s about this specific girl. Rei was known to be the campus playgirl, but that didn’t bother Suna. You had no idea what Rei’s intentions were so you were tryin x g to stay positive, but you couldn’t ignore that gut feeling that was telling you this wasn’t going to end well.
Over time, Suna and Rei grew closer and he admitted to you that he has a crush on her and pleaded you to help him ask her out. Hesitantly, you agreed but immediately regretted it. I mean who helps set up their best friend with a literal snake? And especially when you’ve had a massive crush on him since the 5th grade.
About 3 months after their meeting, he finally asked her out and to nobodies surprise, she said yes. Despite your aching heart, you were happy that Suna found someone, even if that person wasn’t you. Your mother and Suna’s had always thought that the two of you were going to end up together but now that doesn’t seem like the case.
This all took place about 6 months ago. Ever since the two started dating, Suna didn’t talk to you as often. He didn’t make plans with you, he never came over to your house anymore and he hardly ever talked to anyone except for Rei. You rarely ever got to talk to him except for at volleyball for maybe 10 minutes until Rei would shoot daggers at you through her eyes at come drag him away. No matter where he was, she would be there and no one was allowed to talk to him.
She was also very jealous, whenever you would say hi to Suna you swore you could see the veins in her forehead popping out. You were trying your best to maintain your friendship while still being mindful that you may be making Rei uncomfortable, but no matter how hard you tried she always found something to complain about; this resulted in you and Suna not even greeting each other in the school hallway because apparently you were “making a pass” at him
Eventually, you and the rest of the team grew annoyed with this but you couldn’t say anything, Rei was every where. You couldn’t help but not like her, she lives up to her reputation.
Those 6 months felt like hell to you. You missed your best friend, you missed seeing him everyday, you just missed his presence. You and him were practically attached at the hip, when the two of you moved you had no one else to rely on but each other, so for him to suddenly not be available was really hard on you. However, the holidays were nearing and that meant winter break. Winter break means you and Suna finally get to go back to your home prefecture, which just so happens to be three hours away, meaning Rei can’t go.
Of course when Rei found this out she was extremely unhappy, but there was nothing she could do. Her parents wouldn’t let her go and your families were awaiting yours and Suna’s return. She tried everything to convince her parents to let her go, but they ultimately said no. This lead to her having a conversation with you before break started.
(this took place like 2 weeks ago)
It went a little bit like this:
“What the fuck is wrong with you (L/N)? You really think you can just take my boyfriend away from me? What is your issue?” She snarled at you, her eyes dark and full of jealousy.
“Sato I’m not trying to take him away, we’re not from this prefecture and our families want us home for the holidays” You explained calmly as she rolled her eyes
“Oh as if! Cut the excuse (L/N)! I know what you’re planning and it’s not gonna work.” She accused you. What would you even be planning?
“I’m not planning anything..?” You say, more of a question than a statement and you watch her roll her stupid dumb pretty eyes.
“Just stay away from Rintaro. He wants nothing to do with you.” She said as she turned away, her long brown hair swaying as she walked.
To say you were annoyed would be an understatement. Who was she to say what Suna wants and what he doesn’t? Yeah she’s his girlfriend but they haven’t even known each other for a full year. You were beyond tired of this and you badly just wanted to go home where things would be normal.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
You couldn’t help but smile in relief when you saw Suna walking towards you at the train station without the raging Rei behind him. As he walked towards you, you noticed a small smile growing on his tired features. It wasn’t a noticeable smile, it wasn’t one that just anyone would notice, it was one that you and only you could detect.
On the train ride home, everything finally felt like it went back to normal. The two of you were able to talk freely just like you used to, it felt nice. When the two of you arrived at Suna’s houss, it felt even better. Being around your families reminded you of the time before the two of you moved to Hyogo, everything was good, everyone was happy, up until now.
At dinner Suna’s mother brought up Rei and as Suna began to talk about her you went silent, you weren’t sure what to say. You just knew what not to say, it was something along the lines of:
“Yeah but Auntie did Rin here ever mention that his girlfriend is a complete snake?”
“(Name) honey, is something the matter?” Suna’s mother soon brought you out of your thoughts.
“It’s nothing Auntie — the train ride just left me a bit tired is all.” You laughed a fake laugh which caused Suna to squint his eyes at you. You were hoping no one would notice, but your best friend being the observant man he is, he just had to notice.
“Ah is that so? Well it is a bit late and we’re all done eating. Rintaro can you do us a favor and walk (Name) home?” His mother said in a sweet tone. Your house wasn’t far, just down the street. You didn’t need to be walked home, but you appreciated her caring for you.
“I will, I’ll just use the bathroom first.” He said nonchalantly as he pushed in his chair with his hip and made his way to the bathroom upstairs.
His mother waited a minute until she heard the bathroom door close. She could tell something was off with you. You hardly ever reacted like that, it seemed as if you had a million thoughts rushing through your head.
“Now then tell me dear, what is this Rei girl actually like?” She asks dead serious as she makes eye contact with you.
“What do you mean Auntie..?” You knew exactly what she meant, you just didn’t want to answer out of fear of Rin hearing.
“You know what I mean dear, what do you think of the two of them? Are they right for each other?”
“Honestly? No, I don’t think so. They’re — they’re too complicated and Rei is too… Controlling? I don’t know how to tell Rin though, I’m not sure how he’d react.” You nearly began to rant. You probably would’ve had his mother not calmed you down.
“Relax, it’s okay. I know how you feel about my son, dear. I can tell you like him, if you think this relationship isn’t right for him you should tell him. He’s your best friend, he’ll understand.” She smiled as she squeezed your hands in hers. You couldn’t help but smile back. Suna’s mother always felt like a second mother to you, and you couldn’t help but love her for supporting your feelings for Suna.
“Okay. I’ll talk to him on the way home.” You said as she nodded in satisfaction. If his mother thinks it’ll work, what could go wrong?
“(Name) you ready to go?” Suna said suddenly as he approached the two of you with a tired look on his face, more tired looking than usual. He also took a bit longer than usual… Could it have been Rei? No, that’s not any of your business.
“Yeah let’s go” Hugging his mother goodbye, the two of you made your way out the door and towards your house. The walk was silent for a bit until you decided to finally talk to Suna.
“Hey Rin?” You looked up at him as he looked back at you
“Hm?” He hummed back in response.
“Can I ask you something? About Rei..?” The blocker tensed up at this, why did you want to talk about Rei? You hardly ever talked about her.
“What is it?”
“I just… I don’t know if she’s right for you.” You curse at yourself immediately once you finish your sentence. You knew you shouldn’t have worded it like that but it just came out like word vomit.
“Excuse me?” He sounded offended, rightly so though.
“Shit— I’m sorry Rin I didn’t mean it like that” Your eyes went wide at his tone, you immediately try to apologize but he just shuts it down.
“What is that supposed to mean, (Name)This is my relationship, not yours.”
“I know that I’m just trying to warn you—“
“Warn me about what? Fucking hell (Name! you’re like a toddler, you don’t know when to leave me alone. Can you just butt out of my business for once?”
“Butt out? Rin I’m just trying to help you! I don’t think you’ve noticed, but Rei has been so controlling of you! We miss you, the team misses you, I miss you Rin. I just want my best friend back!”
“Yeah, butt out. I want you to mind your own fucking business. So what if you think Rei is controlling? Whether you like it or not Rei is my girlfriend, she’s my top priority. So I’m sorry if I’m not paying attention to you like I used to but I actually have a life.” Ouch. His words stung like salt on an open wound. He knew how to hit you where it hurt.
“Rin that’s not all I’m trying to say.”
“Oh my god (Name) what part of butt out do you not understand? You’re so fucking annoying. I’m sorry that no one wants you but just cause no one wants you doesn’t mean that you have to come and mess with my relationship! What Rei and I do is none of your concern so I’m sorry if you’re unhappy but you get no say in this.”
“Rin do you hear what I’m saying right now? I’m not saying I should have a say in your relationship, I’m trying to warn you. Please just listen to me, you have no idea what I’ve heard about Rei on campus and—“
“You don’t even know Rei, (Name). You’ve put in no effort into talking to her and now you’re just coming at her for no reason!” He got you at the first part. However he was still partially wrong. You tried talking to her at first, but she turned you down and whenever you’d try she looked as if she was going to murder you so you just stopped trying.
“Oh my god Rin why are you always defending her? She’s not always the victim, y’know what she said to me before we left Hyogo?” He seemed confused so he stayed quiet.
“She told me to stay the fuck away from you cause you want nothing to do with me!” He rolled his eyes at you.
“Oh like hell she did! She wouldn’t do something like that, (Name) you’re just insecure and you’re such a fucking cry baby. Can you just grow up?”
“Grow up? I am growing up, Rin. I’m here trying to be the bigger person and help you but you won’t fucking listen to me!” He only scoffs at you
“I don’t need your help, You’ve never done anything to help me.” That was a lie. He knew it was.
“Shut up Rin. You have no idea what you’re talking about. I have been here since day one, through thick and thin and you’re saying I’ve never helped you? I moved to Hyogo with you so that you wouldn’t be by yourself, I made sure you were healthy and on top of grades, I was always there whenever you needed me.” He knew all of this. He knew how much he owed you but he didn’t want to admit it.
“I didn’t ask you to be there.” He shouldn’t have said that, he knew you were there because you wanted to be, he didn’t have to ask you.
“You didn’t have to! Rin you’re my best friend I would’ve gone through hell and back just to make sure you’re okay! I care about you Rin. All I’m asking of you is for you to listen to what I’m saying. I don’t want to see you hurt.” Your heart was aching and your head was throbbing. This conversation was giving you a migraine.
“Can you shut up? I don’t need you nagging about my relationship when you’ve never even been in one. I get it you care or whatever but I could care less, I said it already but I don’t need your help. Can you just accept the fact that you don’t need to be constantly in my life and you don’t have to be butting around all the time? You say Rei is controlling but do you see yourself? This is why I chose to be with Rei instead of you, she doesn’t always bombard and nag me, she actually— “ This was your breaking point. You could bear to hear him belittle you and compare you to someone you’re nothing alike. He doesn’t even know why he was still talking, its like he can’t control his own mouth.
“You know what? I’m done. I’m not doing this anymore, it’s a lost cause because clearly you don’t want to hear me out! I don’t need you comparing me to her. Just leave me alone Suna.” That’s all you said as you walked away from him. He didn’t think you were being serious when you said that last sentence, he didn’t think this argument was enough to end your friendship, but clearly he had no idea about the impact of his words.
When he returned back to his house, he acted as if everything were normal. The two of you have argued before and he was sure it would go back to normal. He had no idea how wrong he was.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
School wasn’t the same since.
Some things were the same though, he was still with Rei, you were still a manager. But the main difference, is that you two aren’t friends anymore. He didn’t think you were being serious. He thought that you two would just take a break and then you’d go back to normal, but clearly that wasn’t going to happen. It seemed like you truly had no intent of speaking to him again.
In fact, it’s been 2 months since the two of you last spoke and his relationship was going down hill rapidly. Everyone on campus could tell something was up but no one dared to ask. All they knew is that you and Suna were no longer friends, and it ached his heart knowing that it’s his fault.
He tried texted you, but you never answered simply just leaving him on read.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
rin: I’m sorry (12/24/12) 11:30 pm
rin: Please pick up(12/25/12) 10:30 am
rin: (Name)?(12/25/12) 10:32 am
rin: Are you okay? (12/25/12) 10:35 am
rin: I know I fucked up just please answer your phone (12/25/12) 10:39 am
rin: (Name)‼️‼️ (12/25/12) 10:42 am
rin: (Name) if you dont answer the phone. 10:49 am
rin: Yk what fine I’ll leave you alone (12/25/12) 11:13 am
rin: I miss you, I’m sorry. (1/26/13) 12:47 am
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
Suna’s thoughts
“I miss my best friend, but it’s my fault she’s even gone in the first place. I’m sure she hates me, but thats my fault too. I’m sorry (Name)”
Every day he regrets that night. He see’s you in the hallway every day and he can’t help but wish he could just go back in time before he said all of that shit. He feels like a total asshole everyday. He knows for a fact his younger self would have hated him for driving you away. When he sees you, he wants nothing more than you hug you just like he used to. He misses seeing you walking happily around his apartment while you two wait on the food you ordered.
He should’ve listened to you and he knew that. He let his anger get the better of him and he blew up on you.
You warned him and he didn’t listen. He wanted to blame Rei for this, but it wasn’t her fault. It was no one’s fault but his. It’s his fault you don’t want to talk to him anymore and he has no one to blame but himself.
Suna Rintaro is a man of many regrets, but hurting you is his greatest regret.
“I don’t know if she’ll ever want to be friends again. I doubt she does, but I’ll be waiting for her anyway, for as long as it takes.”
Or at least thats what he thinks.
°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•
(Name)s thoughts
“Even though I miss him, I need to heal first. I’m not ready to face him yet, but there is no way in hell I’d ever throw away our friendship. We just need time. I asked him to leave me alone and he’s learning to respect that.”
He thinks you hate him, but the truth is you could never hate him. Even if you tried you don’t think you’d ever be able to hate him. Yes he hurt you, but before he hurt you he protected you with all he had. When the two of you moved to Hyogo, he would walk you to school every morning and night just to make sure you were safe. You still see his messages, you haven’t blocked him, and yes it seems cruel but you just need time to heal. You told him not to talk to you again, but you know you’ll come back. Not any time soon, but when the time is right. It won’t be the same as it used to be, but you’d never leave him alone.
You’re upset he didn’t listen to you, but it taught him a lesson. Plus it’s only your second year of high school, high school isn’t forever. One fight isn’t enough to end your 16 years of friendship, in a few years it’ll only be an old wound that healed and turned into a scar.
You miss him just as much as he misses you, but you are waiting patiently for the right time for you to come back but for now, the two of you need time apart to heal.
“He has nothing to worry about, he’s my best friend and no one will ever take that place from him”
Fin~
•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•~•
a/n: thinking about making a part 2 with a happy ending
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kentolove · 2 years
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“dump your bf if he’s never given you flowers before”
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He tries to console himself.
Really, he does.
He tells himself that it’s really not that serious, and all you did was like a tweet saying to dump your boyfriend if he’s never given you flowers before.
Has he ever given you flowers?
He thinks of your one month anniversary, then your six month, then your one year, then your two year anniversary, and how none of them were spent with a beautiful flowery confection in your hands.
He recalls your first date, how it was spent inside a small cafe where you both spilled your hearts to one another. He knows he never bought you any flowers. Yamaguchi proposed the idea, but he quickly shut him off with a, “what kind of bullshit is that? It’s only the first date, that’s too… romantic, I guess.”
Fuck, he should’ve listened to him. Yamaguchi is never wrong. Never.
He’s learned his lesson now.
The next time he sees you (an excruciating ten minutes after he’s seen your liked tweet) he sits you down on his lap.
“What’s this for?” You smile, and it’s that pretty one that nearly makes Tsukishima melt down to the ground.
“I have a question.”
“Okay,” you grab his cheeks into your two palms and squish his face together. He normally hates the action and immediately pushes your hands away, but he doesn’t have time for that now. Not when you’d break up with him for not buying you flowers.
“Would you ever break up with me?”
Your head tilts to the side in genuine confusion. Break up with your Kei?
“Don’t think too much into it.” He flicks your forehead gently. He can already tell your train of thought, and how you tend to overthink every detail of your life, so he slows your brain down.
“Uh, maybe if you cheated on me? But I think I’d kill you before I broke up with you, yeah.”
Okay. Yeah. He’s fine with that answer. He can live with that.
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Maybe he can’t.
It’s been nearly a month since he last asked you that question, and it still haunts him to this day.
He thinks that maybe one day you’ll come home and tell him that you’re sick of him, that he doesn’t deserve you, and you’ll pack all your bags and leave.
It stresses him out so much, that he vents. He vents. To Bokuto Kōtarō of all people. (He’s gone mad!)
Bokuto does the most Bokuto thing you’d expect, and gives Tsukishima the most obvious answer.
“Well why don’t you just buy them flowers then?”
“It’s not that easy, dumbass.”
“I think it is… I mean, you’re sad you haven’t bought them flowers, so buy them flowers. Problem fixed.”
He leaves the conversation utterly dissatisfied. Until the next day, at 3AM, Tsukishima Kei has a eureka! moment.
“I’ll just buy them flowers!”
(He jolts out of bed with a force so strong that he wakes you up.
You groan, sleepy and with drool at the corner of your mouth, “what are you yelling for? Go back to bed, Kei.”
“Yeah,” he whispers, to nobody in particular, “I’ll just buy you flowers.)
He leaves the house that morning, at around 9AM with a mission in mind. He’s going to the flower shop.
-
Tsukishima enters the small store with hesitation, staring at all the beautiful plants and flowers with skepticism. Which ones would you like? What if you’re allergic to the one he picks out?
“Hello? How can I help you, sir?” A nice lady with a baby pink apron approaches him. She smiles, and Tsukishima thinks he’s being far too dramatic. It’s just some flowers.
“Uh, I’m looking for flowers that send the message of ‘I love you’ or something like that.”
The lady smiles even brighter.
-
Your boyfriend walks into your home with a bouquet of red roses and baby’s-breath blooms. The arrangement is huge, big enough to cover the entirety of your Kei’s head.
“What’s this?” You ask, when he approaches you and places the roses on your lap.
“They’re for you.”
“Really?” Your eyes are as bright as he’s ever seen them, as dazzling as the sun in the sky.
And he can’t believe that he’s deprived himself of this. Of seeing you so happy over something so mundane—so simple—that your eyes shine brighter than all the lights in the night sky.
He loves you. And you love your Kei. (And those red roses, too.)
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torhues · 1 year
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osamu miya.
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"what do you think is the right way to ask someone out?" osamu's sudden question draws out your attention from your english assignment.
you take a moment to think, and while he thinks you're sorting out the most appropriate answers to his question, you're lost looking the answer to just one question that's plaguing your mind : should you tell him, or not?
"uh, who is it for?" you settle with the conclusion that he's asking that question out of curiosity. after all, you both are at an age where romance gradually becomes an integral parts of almost everyone's life.
out of all the years that you've known osamu— which is for around seven years for now— there has been only one time when you've seen him pursuing someone, and that was your best friend in middle school; and like the good friend you were, you helped the two of them confess to each other. you would walk to school and back, watching them holding hands, make plans without you because they were dating and it was understandable. you didn't mind, not at all, for you weren't in love with him at that point.
looking back now, you wonder if things would've turned out different if you hadn't helped your friend, or if you had realised your feelings a bit earlier. back then, you found it amusing to watch two people in love act like idiots, not knowing it'd all come back to you with a much larger impact.
"someone i like," he replies in his classic monotonous voice, as if he couldn't care less about not telling you who he has a crush on. it's exactly how it was back in middle school. had it not been for your friend, you wouldn't have known she was the one osamu had been planning to ask out all along. "goes to the same university as us, might even be in your biochem class,"
and your mind traces over the image of every single person in your class, crossing out the names that don't seem to fit osamu's taste in romantic partners. it's not the first time you're doing this. in fact, you've gotten used to figuring out whether he would be interested in someone just by looking at them. it's something you've learnt as you got better at hiding your feelings.
you've known him long enough to know who he might date yet still, couldn't bring yourself to believe that you could possibly have a chance with him.
"well, i can't tell you if i don't know the person," something about you makes osamu believe that you're a cupid. you're good at reading people, welcoming, albeit not so good at reaching out to strangers, but you are likeable, more than likeable, actually.
he has seen you set people up, including himself, and excluding yourself. the reason why you're not interested in pursuing someone anymore is beyond his comprehension. you have your fair share of knowledge about relationships, have dated a couple of guys before giving up altogether. it's not like your relationships didn't work, but it always seemed as if you were better off without them.
even while dating, it looks like your eyes are looking for someone else while being in someone's arms.
he sighs, putting down his phone. "just tell me what you like, people aren't much different after all,"
"uh, well, i hate public confessions and people who confess through calls and texts," which stands true for most the people out there. public confessions are more of a show off and confessing through texts is just, not enough. "also, i like to stay at home or be at some cafe so like, arcades, amusement parks and places like those aren't up to my liking either,"
you notice the smile on his face, along with the dreamy eyes and make him look prettier than he already is. frankly, the idea of osamu doing everything you like to ask someone else out hurts more than it should. you're probably not the only persons with those likes and dislikes. you know you should be happy for him and the person he likes because in the end, osamu is everything you, or anyone, could ask for.
"what about flowers? lilacs?" he asks, getting back to his phone.
"what are you doing, congratulating someone on their graduation?" his lips instantly curve into a frown, and you know in his head, he's snickering about how he is not the best when it comes to picking flowers, and that you shouldn't make fun of him for this. "i'd say tulips, they're a better gifts for first dates and confessions,"
one day, back in first year of university, osamu asked you why you don't seek relationships anymore. thinking about it now, you never gave him an absolute answer.
on some days, the answer would be academics, other days, it would be sadness looming over your shoulders after watching your ex with someone else. sometimes, you would excuse it by saying it's a waste of time and when asked when you're drunk, you'd say it's because you already have someone in mind, someone who can't be yours, no matter how much you try.
on some days, you wonder if osamu ever thinks about all the answers, or excuses, you gave to his question. there are times when the worlds makes compels you to believe that osamu likes you back, but then you realise that if he did, he wouldn't have asked out others all this time. you did drop hints regarding your feelings for him, and he failed to catch on for he for too busy looking at everyone except you.
"i wonder why you don't date anymore," the question arises again, flooding all the memories back into your head.
"i did have someone i liked, but he likes someone else," and you realise you can't lie to him anymore. "so, i gave up," osamu finds it amusing how you say those words with a smile, and he finds it despairing knowing that now, you've simply learnt to live with pain while pretending to be okay.
he shoots you a comforting smile, "i hope that wouldn't be the case for me,"
"me too," and you smile back.
he gets off your bed, picking up his jacket while offering soft apologies for the state your bed is in because of him. sometimes, you feel like there should be a warning for everyone who dates him : caution, this man doesn't know how to keep the bed clean. there are nights when you go to sleep thinking about how you're probably the only one who can keep up with this habit of his, and then wake up realising that it wasn't a problem to anyone it now so, it wouldn't be in future either.
it's like oscillating between the possibility and impossibility of him and you, caressing your little heart with false hope.
"ah, what should i say while confessing?" he shoots another question, making you snicker in annoyance.
"c'mon 'samu, you're not asking someone out for the first time,"
"just tell me,"
and you allow yourself to get lost in thoughts again. for a brief second, you consider telling him to not confess. the reason? your feelings, but again, you and him aren't meant to be together in the first place. it's just like how the saying goes— cupids must not fall in love— and you did the forbidden, knowing it would hurt you ten folds more every time you tie his threads with someone that's not you.
"i don't know, just give the flowers and ask if they'd like to go out with you or something," he chimes a faint thank you before leaving your room, and then your apartment. this time, you don't walk up to the door to see him off, neither do you wish him good luck, and surprisingly, osamu doesn't seem to notice your minute absence either.
it's fine, you tell yourself, one of you has to start getting accustomed to the other's absence. while the process has already begun for you, you hope osamu gets used to it as well. you need him to stop reaching you out for relationship advices because you don't know how long you can compose yourself before shattering once again. you try to distract yourself with essays due next month or even further, reading chapters that haven't been taught in class, reading research papers; just anything that can keep your mind off osamu.
you don't want to think about him, or what he's doing. maybe, he's buying the flowers, making preparations or calling his crush and asking them to meet him at their favourite place. even better if his crush confessed while he has been preparing a proposal of his own, it would be cinematic. you don't want to think about him at all, but the more you try, the deeper he engraves inside your mind.
the evening rolls by with you still sitting at your study desk with a bunch of papers lying around a not one complete work. there are rain splatters on your windows and you hope the off-season showers haven't ruined his confession. you can't wish for the other person to like him back, so you just wish for his happiness; whatever makes him happy, even if it means pushing him away.
and when you manage to drag yourself to the kitchen to grab something to eat and make yourself feel better, the sound of your doorbell hits your ears. the rain hits harder, you muster up the energy to walk up to the door.
there's osamu standing with a love sick smile and slightly wet hair, along with rain splatters on his shirt, and the bouquet of tulips in his hand. "will you go out with me?"
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