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#he's literally growing up with these images printed in his head
wearenotjustnumbers2 · 6 months
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This baby remained under the rubble for six hours. Read it again. By some miracle, he survived and he was rescued. But his mother who was holding him didn't. He looks like he's in shock, you can see tears coming out of his eyes but no expression or any sound to indicate his pain.
We are not numbers. Make an effort to end this.
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wrongpublishing · 9 months
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BOOK REVIEW: Nick Cutter and Andrew F. Sullivan's The Handyman Method
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by Elizabeth Broadbent, Staff Writer.
If you’ve read The Marigold or were lucky enough to sit through StokerCon’s panel on anomalous architecture, you know Andrew Sullivan’s a master of the trope. The Handyman Method (Saga Press, an imprint of Simon & Schuster) pairs him with Nick Cutter (Rust and Bone, Cataract City) in a haunted house/DIY/the-sins-of-the-father-will-bite-you-in-the-ass novel out August 8th. With memorable characters and the same you-never-saw-this-coming hits as The Marigold, this work’s one more reason you need these guys on your must-read-list.
At first glance, Trent Sabor’s an average dude married to an average wife (Rita), with an average kid (Milo) and his plucky pet turtle, Morty. They seem, on paper, to be the perfect family. They move into the first house of a new development, Dunsany Estates. Their house, like them, seems perfect. It may be surrounded by dirt on every side, but it looks like everything they’ve ever dreamed of. 
The cracks begin to show—literally—when Trent discovers a gaping hole in their closet. Incandescent with rage, he finds a YouTube channel, Handyman Hank, to help him patch it. Meanwhile, his son’s hooked up to his tablet watching Little Boy Blue. As the Sabors’ new home begins to show more cracks, so does Trent’s family.
Handyman Hank goes from a few vids to “a cornucopia for the Y-chromosome set” endorsing “a certain kind of man[liness]” which “does things The Old-Fashioned way.” Trent’s sucked in, for Reasons that I won’t reveal—you deserve, like Trent, to discover these cracks the old-fashioned way. 
This novel’s concept feels both wildly imaginative—like so much new horror, with that Jesus-Christ-I-never-thought-of-that feel—and eminently relatable. Men lose their way; they turn to sketchy sources for validation. Spouses drift. Parents and children grow apart. It’s these metaphorical cracks in both relationships and identities that lie at the heart of this novel and its house. 
And if you’re a sucker for prose (you are, if you’ve read Sullivan’s earlier work; my apologies to Cutter for an ignorance about his), you’ll swoon. It’s not showy, but it’s rich, beautiful, unforgettable. The image of little Milo “plant[ing] his hands on his hips with an exaggerated squint, a pint-sized foreman assessing a construction site”—I can’t get that one from my head. My kids are a little older now, but goddamn if I can’t picture that stance.
Those prose and images are a gift in a fast-paced novel like this. You’ll find yourself rereading, sometimes slowing down to savor those moments, like Trent’s moment when “his eyelids fluttered and his breath bottomed out—some kind of psychic brownout that interrupted the power grid of his brain.” 
And once you get it, you get it, and you’ll want to read it again. You’ll flip through and see the pinpoint accuracy of their metaphors, the hidden mechanisms of characters’ motivations, and maybe that’s a sign you’ve got a real cracker of a book in your hands: you put it down and pick it up again. Then you’ll understand why Simon & Schuster picked it up.
You can pick up The Handyman Method in little more than a week, August 8th. Preorder it before it kicks to a second printing, third, or fourth printing—and it will. You’ll find this one on your Barnes & Noble shelves later this year, pinky-swear. 
Buy the book:
Nick Cutter (website)
Andrew F. Sullivan (website)
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ecoamerica · 25 days
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youtube
Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared
The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!
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ravenintraining · 1 year
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MAG 1- Anglerfish
I hate hearing the first episodes of anything over again because the voices lack all of the personality they grow into over time. Especially this posh prick I'm hearing right now.(/j)
(analysis under cut so i don't feel bad)
Anyways, let's get down to business.
I've spent many of the last few weeks trying to visualize the layout of the Archives(for fic writing purposes), and the part where he can see thousands just from where he's sitting (in a room with a door separating it from the rest of the area, as is mentioned later) really throws all of that off. I like to think he saw a bunch of boxes full of papers and assumed those were statements, even though in the event that his predecessor wasn't an eldritch horror they're probably be print-offs from seminars or audit logs or literally anything else. In my head all of them are actually mounds of scrap paper from a local school so that Elias has to deal with the information overload of creative writing classes.
"so the only thing in most of the files are the statements themselves" this is REALLY outing Jon for not understanding what an Archive does. Why, pray tell, would the research be down in long-term storage? When you have a whole section of this Institute called RESEARCH DIVISION? Obviously they'd keep their OWN RECORDS UP THERE. Probably digitized by now because you all had your own computers. Give me a BREAK.
"he's not likely to contribute anything but deh-LAYS >://" i think you should re-adjust that stick up your ass it's starting to effect your Brain. you've known this dude for all of an hour tops calm your tits. Technically speaking so far the only one that's delayed you was your inability to record something digitally and so it's You who is currently delaying the Archives. Chomp my dick loserboy.
Just remembered that these recordings are available to the public. Dog no college student gives a shit about you and your problems they're just gonna make fun of you on the internet. Actually I think a really funny socmed au could come out of the twitter commentary of someone reading the statements from the magnus institute bc the transcriber drops his drama ALL OVER them.
they must have gotten SO many statements in 2012. I mean, people thought the world was going to end. This of course is the largest part behind why I think the Extinction isn't real and is just a version of the End, because it would have manifested in either 1999 or 2012 when everyone was so worried the world would end. (which also, sidenote, i think could have been perfect explanations of end rituals that failed. i think end avatars would 100% try at least a few times)
sorry I haven't even gotten to the statement yet. idk this one really isnt even that interesting? like oooo dude trips on brick path, stranger ignores that he hurt himself and wants to bum a cigarette. i think it would be better if the anglerfish like actually got its hand(s?) on him and then he got away instead bc without that the only scary part is the implications the episode name gives you. it leads to a great reveal of what happened to the victims later on in the melanie statement (stapling her skin back on) but without that context it's just a dude who's talking to you without opening his mouth.
"el oh el" i bet tim and sasha took the tape after he recorded it just to hear how jon would pronounce 'lol.' i only think that bc that's what I would do.
it is interesting that the body doesnt show up in the images though. like i figured considering the way the stranger loves manipulating digital tech that it would get a kick out of the picture showing the guy just floating there boreing its eyes into your skull. like i get it was meant to be the "light" of the anglerfish creating the illusion of a harmless creature that then turns out to not be there but come onnnn is that Really a stranger thing to do. could be so much better. the stranger should get a suggestion box i have some thoughts.
okay that's all folks. catch you tomorrow for the same shenanigans
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laurenairay · 2 years
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Day 8 – Tyler Seguin
Trope: Tracks in the snow
Word Count: 550 words
A/N: How could I not include the cutest dogs in the world?? There was literally no-one else I wanted to do this trope for, and I dedicate it to @texanstarslove 😘
*
“I wish the boys were here with us,”
You bit your lip and looked up at Tyler, wincing at the wistfulness on his face. The two of you were visiting your family in Vancouver, you having flown up to meet Tyler as he had a game against the Canucks tomorrow. After lunch you had both agreed to go out for a walk in the snow with your younger cousins and the family dog, giving your aunt and an uncle a break from the kids – but you hadn’t realised how much spending time with a dog in the snow would affect Tyler.
Of course he would miss his dogs. Of course. Your aunt and uncle’s dog, a german shepherd called Bella, was of a similar size to Gerry, and you knew that the trail of fresh paw prints she had left in front of you was only going to remind him of the dogs that weren’t able to be here for such a short trip.
“I’m sorry babe. I didn’t think,” you groaned, “we can head back if you want?”
But Tyler quickly shook his head, dispelling the suggestion.
“No, no, definitely not. Your cousins are having fun,” Tyler said.
“Are you though?” you frowned.
“I am, I promise,” he reassured you, smiling, “I just know that the boys would have fun in the snow too,”
That was one thing about living in Texas with Tyler – there was never snow at Christmas. Not having a white Christmas took away the magic a little bit for you from the winter time, not having that giddiness of playing in the snow and experiencing that icy frost that you’d grown up with, but being with Tyler was worth missing out on everything like that. You knew that much.
“They would. They really would,”
“I mean, Gerry would be going nuts and Cash probably would too. Marshall would just be lumbering along beside us though,” Tyler mused.
You giggled at the image, Tyler having described his dogs perfectly.
“They’d all love it, in their own ways,” you nodded, nudging him with your shoulder.
Tyler nudged you back, finally smiling widely, squeezing your hand in thanks.
“It’s one of the only downsides of living in Texas. Rarely any snow and definitely not like we had in Canada growing up,” Tyler sighed.
It was like he read your mind. Still, you didn’t want to make him too sad, and not on such a beautiful day. And definitely not the day before a game.
“Let’s enjoy the time we have with this dog, and then we can plan something fun with the boys when we get back. Maybe we can even hire a snow machine and create a snow pile for them on a cooler day,” you suggested.
The moment Tyler’s eyes lit up, you knew immediately that this plan was sold. Hah, now that you thought about it, you could imagine the joy for each of the dogs, and you already knew Tyler would go all out. It was going to be a winter wonderland after all.
“You have the best ideas,” Tyler said happily, pressing a kiss to the side of your head.
“If it makes you smile, that’s all that matters to me,” you shrugged.
Tyler’s answering grin was all you needed to see.
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jiminrings · 3 years
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last chronological part for stem koo... WHEW I WATCHED THEM GROW WHAT’S GONNA HAPPEN NOW
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cold senior!y/n x stem major koo masterlist :D
they finally become lunchbox lovers
“you’re asking me what’s jungkook like?”
jimin couldn't be any more surprised
first of all, his day started with yOU texting him and asking if you can drop by for a second, and the moment he texted "sure???", you're literally already knocking on the door
and second, you're asking him???
“oh come on. he clings to you with every chance he gets. i thought you gave him a chance already.”
your eyes only deadpan that jimin actually gets the hint, his mouth curling in a eureka moment that he managed to figure out himself without you talking
“oH! so that’s why you’re asking me because you’re thinking of giving him an actual chance.”
alright finally
you slump in relief over not saying it out loud, expressing the slightest bit of worry you have to someone (that's not as close to you like yoongi and jin are) who'd get where you're coming from without bias
“i just wanna know how he usually is when he’s not on my heels.”
“honestly? the same. probably even a bit more clingier.”
jimin wastes no time in ratting jungkook out, even leaning back to the couch with how relaxed he is
“talks about you too. i’m sorry y/n but even i know what shampoo you use!!!”
jimins knows your wHAT
"my shampoo???"
“mhmm. made me drive him to a grocery store at 10 in the evening so he can individually smell all the shampoos without anyone calling him a creep or something like that,” he nods earnestly and doesn't look like he's playing with you or the sort
you're quite frozen and jungkook's roommate isn't at all fazed and is even pulling up pICTURES of their impromptu grocery trip
“he even made it in a scientific paper format. with the hypothesis and conclusion and everything.”
he points it out just in time when you swipe to jimin's hand holding a printed piece of paper with the document in the monitor right behind it, the next pictures being blurry because that's when jungkook freaked out
jimin gets his phone back but not without sending you the pictures you just saw even if you didn't ask for them, trying to hide the amusement in your eyes when you decide to scroll through them again later
“cut him some slack though. he’s never really had a girlfriend, y’know? or like even a crush. he’s just navigating it with his instincts and all the advice he gets.”
hold on a second
“... advice?”
he thought you'd never ask (he'll still say it even if you don't) which is why he brightly grins, hunching over as if to let you in on a guarded secret
“i’m one of his consultants!!! didn’t suggest the shampoo part though.”
who could have possibly thought of that idea then ://
you hum in faux complacency, trying to get this as fast as possible so you could make up your mind quicker
“what else?”
jimin's relaxed now that he's had a proper laugh with you and realized you aren't as Intimidating As He Thought You Were, recounting the things in his mind like a to-do list
“he’s sickeningly kind.”
the gravity of his words strike him before they do with you, straightening his posture to clear up the air right away, “but i knoW that what he did to you is the furthest thing from kind, and trust me, i really got that point across!!!”
by point, jimin means cooking him burnt meals and jungkook having to endure it because he doesn't like wasting food
additionally, that also meant jimin served kook a cRISP smack on the back of his boba ball head into next week
look at him <3 seokjin, yoongi AND jimin gave him shit!!! now isn;t that teamwork
you're unable to paint the mental image in your head because he continues, grabbing your attention once again
“but apart from that, jungkook could just be too kind for his own sake,” he says sincerely. “he’s like the kid the principal refers to in elementary when they talk about peer pressure!!!”
your first instinct is to snort at that, the mental image definitely forming in your head now
is it just sO bad that you and jimin agree on this
“jokes aside, jungkook’s really genuine.”
it's the last thing jimin wraps it off with when you stand from the couch, cheeks still a little warm when he trails you behind the door
you're just about to thank him when the door in front of you opens and almost hits you in the process, the person behind it just as alarmed
jungkook’s just now coming home because he had to pick up some last-minute groceries from the convenience store downstairs that jimin forgot from his last run, clearly startled to why would wou be here
"oH???? y/n??? what are you doing here???"
his pupils are shaking between the two of you and he's not even trying to hide is incoming panic
“.... a-are you and jimin-“
“yup! sorry bud! we were just-...” jimin's attempt at a lighthearted joke is halted as fast as it was introduced, getting a smack on the middle of his back that makes him wince
“you’re annoying, jimin."
oOOOOH you just put your palm on him!! yea at this rate he's gonna be your best friend too won't he
jungkook's processing things as fast as he could, getting a reassuring glance from you that puts him at ease
“we were just talking, kook.”
he nods even if he's still a tiny bit unsure, calling for you when you're on your way out the door
“a-about what though?”
:-)
“you’d know soon enough.”
( ♡ )
“you wanna tell me now why we went on this drive?”
seokjin yawns at a stoplight even when his car is the only one waiting on the intersection right now, not in the mood for a ticket with a printed traffic light picture of him mid-yawn in his matching pajamas anytime soon
“no reason," you sing-song and it makes him snort, rubbing the sleep out of his eyes. “couldn’t sleep."
“well that makes one of us.”
you've unabashedly knocked on jin's door and even if it took you two tries, he still answered nonetheless, not even asking for an explanation why before he sleepily took his keys and grabbed his house slippers for shoes
you had no destination in mind at 3 in the morning which is why jin’s just driving for no rhyme nor direction and is just going with his brain’s one-second impulses of where to turn
he’s game for anything, actually — that much you know
although you do know that jin literally wouldn't do this for anyone else besides the people he find worth all this (aka everyone except you and yoongi and ok maybe namjoon sometimes)
the drive is beyond serene and even with repetitive radio music playing in the background, you don't actually mind it
when you're with jin, it just feels like you're in a constant bubble of comfort and ease that you always try to look for in everything
he doesn't necessarily need explanations,, he just deduces from things at face-value and later ask about it when you're comfortable enough to share
jin points at a drive-thru he suddenly had a craving for as you were about to suggest it anyway
you're not even quite sure why there's a line but neither of you complain, the situation more than bearable that a little waiting wouldn't dampen your mood
the words you've been thinking of the whole day finally slip across the silence, as casual yet as sincere as they could be
“i’m really thankful that you’re in my life, jin. you know that right?”
he seems pleasantly surprised when you look at his side profile, shaking his head
“mhmm. you only tell me a couple times but you put your knee on top of mine everyday,” he chuckles at the habit of yours and he kNOWS for a fact you would put your knee on top of his if only he wasn't behind the wheel. “tell me all about it, kid.”
it's genuine laughter that encompasses the whole car, his chuckles suddenly ceasing when he realizes another possibility
“you’re not asking me for allowance, are you? because yoongi’s already bugging me for his next month’s.”
wait what
“you give yoongi an allowance???”
“you didn’t know???”
:///
“... i’m not asking for an allowance.”
“..... but do you want it,.,..”
jin sees you pursing your lips and intentionally looking at everywhere but him, already getting his answer
“fine. that’s the furthest you two could get from me!! don’t expect me to pack your lunchboxes to school now. you must be crazy.”
jin, in fact, packs you and yoongi lunchboxes more often than not
jin, aLSO, does all the paper rolling for you so when the three of u get occasionally high, it’s all nice and tight
jin is also the one who does all the talking on the phone to customer service when neither of you are willing
he asks the moment he relays your usual midnight snack slash early breakfast order he's already memorized to the attendant, patiently looking at you
“you want anything else with that?”
“i’m all good.”
it's in between cars and stoplights that the car is filled with more emotion again, acting on it when you realize it when seokjin's mid-bite on his hashbrowns
“jin?”
“yes?” he speaks muffled, looking at you once before bringing his attention back on the changing stoplight
“love you.”
he feels himself still for a second even if his foot's on the gas and one hand is on the wheel, a somber look on his face that he later smiles sincerely
“love you too, kid.”
( ♡ )
“it’s not my birthday if that’s what you’re thinking.”
yoongi sleepily mumbles the moment he feels his bed dipping, his side that was once holding a pillow now being occupied by you
“i know.”
you wedge yourself between his heavy comforter, tossing and turning until it feels comfortable
“but i actually don’t know your birthday lol it’s-...”
“fuck right off.”
yoongi doesn't question why you're in his bed, because the last time you did, it was because you were left traumatized after seeing a genuinely good horror movie that it was pending to give you nightmares
he didn't see you watch any movie today though, but he'll take you in nonetheless
“kidding.”
you offer in consolation because yoongi's birthday is in your calendar even if you know it by heart, a mindless hum in reply
it's when you drop your arm on his waist like it's dead weight and relax completely, your face near to his mop of hair that it's making him think you're actually cuddling him rn
quick how can he get a picture of this to get this framed
“are you telling me now?”
he questions with his eyes half-open, shimmying backwards so that you're able to hug him more comfortably
“my airconditioner’s busted.”
“mhmm. give me ten minutes. i’ll fix it for you.”
it's 4 am and if your airconditioner really was busted, you wouldn't have let it stay busted for that long
“don’t. it’s okay. i wanna be here anyways.”
both you and yoongi know that your airconditioner’s in tip-top shape and is actually the one that blows the coldest air in the dorm
sometimes you think he’s an angel in disguise because there’s no way you deserve a human best friend like him
“yoongs?”
“hmm?” he hums before he falls asleep again, trying to keep up while having his eyes closed so he could listen to you
“you know that i’m really glad you’re in my life, right?”
oh
:)
“mhmm. you don’t say, sweets," he teasingly chuckles, feeling his ribcage rise in amusement under your arm
“fuck-“
“yeah, i know. i do, because you put me as your family member in your emergency contacts, but you don’t know that i know that.”
... oh
you don't even know how yoongi came to know but you don't question it, the warmth in your heart doubling
“love you.”
“love you too, y/n.”
( ♡ )
jungkook’s the most nervous he’s been in awhile
and that’s coming from him who sees yoongi in almost a daily basis
after all, jin did tell him you can be quite forgetful becasue you tend to take care of things all at once
he’ll sTILL try to be as smooth and casual as much as possible though
“big game tomorrow huh?”
and by big game that means as in your last qualifying game to whether or not your team would compete in the yearly (not to mention prestigious) soccer tournament
you chuckle at the thought because by now, you should already be sleeping and getting some rest even if it’s just seven in the evening
but you’re here <3 out at a park near jungkook’s dorm, sharing hand warmers <3
“yeah. it’s a make or break match.”
“i actually haven’t seen you play before, y’know," jungkook silently admits, looking down on his shoes as he thinks if he's just offended you
“really?” you ask in genuine curiosity, “then how come you interviewed me for your little survey when you haven’t watched me play before?”
oh
tHAT
“i uh, i actually just really wanted to talk to you that day. i-i don’t normally approach people first, but you just looked warm enough for me to reach out first.”
he's babbling before he even knows it, oblivious the growing smile on your face
“then i asked jimin because he kNOWS everything, and it was all in good fate that it turned out you were the soccer captain!! i was excited because i had a legitimate reason to talk to you that day.”
so that’s why
he wanted to talk to you even before his lunchboxes were taken out of the situation!!!
“how about me? why was it me?”
ahem
you're not trying to be funny but you can't help but chuckle, scratching the back of your ear in thought
“i honestly couldn’t tell either, jungkook.”
he almost coughs in shock, masking it off with playing it off for the bite of the chill of the night
“all i know is that something told me it was you,” you timidly add, looking down on your hands. “and i went for it.”
right can he chalk up mad blushing to the night air
he fiddles with the drawstrings of his sweatpants this time, his eye contact with you becoming fidgety
“big game tomorrow,” he repeats and you're just about to tell him that your conversation sounds like it's gonna be repeated
“don’t forget your eyedrops, alright?”
....
was that smooth enough
“eyedrops?”
yeah
uhm
that was... random
“oh right! you gave them back to me.”
“yeah. you should open it tonight, probably. to see if it’s already all-evaporated, y’know? if it is, then let me know tomorrow so i can buy you new ones.”
“highly doubt that they would, but alright, kook.”
you take the little banter to be your cue to walk back to your dorm, about to say goodbye to him when he makes an audible sound of confusion
it confuses you even more when he's trailing behind you
“your dorm’s twenty feet away from where we are, jungkook.”
“y-yeah i know that!! i’m walking you home, silly.”
right!!
hee-hee
he’s keeping his hands to himself even if he BADLY wants to hold your hand or even your forearm but he has to resist that urge rn
but he does intentionally brush shoulders with you and mumble “pothole.” so he could nUDGE you to the side even if there aren’t any to begin with
silence with jungkook now is comfortable as it has been for more than awhile, the walk passing by faster that you almost wish you walked slower
goddamn it he should've said there was a pothole atleast ten more times to make the walk longer
“goodnight, koo.”
“goodnight, y/n.”
there’s obviously no goodnight kiss but he dOES get a squeeze on his bicep
you take your time when you come home — to unwind as much as you could before you stress yourself out tomorrow
your shower routine may have took a little longer this time but it makes you get dressed as quick as you could when your eyes see the origami box you've been putting off from opening, one that jungkook just told you to open, because as far as you knew they were just EYEDROPS!!!
... the supposed bottle of eyedrops that’s too well-packaged and clearly thought-out
an origami box, a carebear heart initial drawstring pouch AND a plain ziplock baggie as if the other two weren’t enough
it’s when you open the box within the ziplock bag that you feel it’s definitely not as light as a bottle of eyedrops would be
there’s a very visible dent weighing down on the pouch (that’s within the origami box) that’s cLEARLY not your eyedrops
you’re actually nervous to the point that you just open unfurl it with your eyes closed, feeling two items in there
the plastic bottle of eyedrops, and definitely the cool surface of what feels like
a bracelet?
it’s a pretty straightforward yet timelessly elegant silver link bracelet, equipped with a couple options for how tight or loose you want to wear it
it hits you all at once and god does it just render you speechless
jungkook has this bracelet too.
you’re quite speechless and in between looking at it up-close to avoiding looking at it at all, trying to calm your breathing by focusing on the eyedrops instead
the said eyedrops you've been so used to seeing that you immediately sense that there's something oFF with the label???
its stuck-on, that's for sure, but something about it is not as seamless and stationary and official as it should be
it's almost as if there's something snuck inside it and-
...
..... there is
it's scotch tape that's just as thin as the actual label of the bottle itself, having to peel the whole label in order to see it in entirety
it's the same double-sided label jungkook worked so hard to peel flawlessly so he could try and replicate it in the same exact design and measurements, having to even take it up to a classmate from stem he once knew that transferred to graphic design
(yeonjun did ask for a science paper in exchange for his replication of the eyedrops slash adhesive label because who fucking kNEW he still had science even when in graphic design, but jungkook thinks it's fair trade so it's worth it)
it's the same exact label jungkook's had for a month and only recently gave it to you a week ago, a truth he's long since known
it's the same exact label that reads —
i love you
— in his handwriting you've come to known by heart, the label in your hand feeling much more heavy than the bracelet in the other
you already know what to do.
.
.
.
it's game day and u are about to launch yourself into orbit if you hear oNE more drum cheer because it just makes you nervous even more
yeah SURE it makes you pumped when it's the actual game itself but not now!!! not now when you're pumping yourself with electrolytes and at the risk of peeing from nervousness and too much hydration
you haven't seen seokjin nor yoongi yet and as much as that lessens the pressure on you, that alsO makes you nervous because they're your emotional support people!!!! where r they
usually you would see them in the front row of the bleachers and neither of them have any snacks because all of their focus would be on you
jin is nOT mr. kim from student affairs when it comes to your games,,, nuh-uh sir,,, he's that guy from the other team that glares so hard it dISTRACTS me from scoring in the perspective of the opposing team
coach's about to whistle like five minutes from now for a final huddle and everyone's getting their final stretches in
you're too busy looking for people that you actually want to be here that you're taken off-guard when one of them grasps at your forearm, a breathless smile one his face
"give them hell out there, alright. you're a champ."
it's jungkook!!!
IT'S JUNGKOOK!!!!@&$&":@:"$
he looks especially handsome today that you just short-circuit immediately
he's wearing a shirt with your team colors on it aND!!!
he ditched his glasses today to wear contacts, not only because he wanted to look a bit more different and special today, but because he's also scared that a ball would be thrown in his direction and injure him with the additional impact of his glasses
his hair's pushed back with his forehead showing instead of his usual hairstyle and god is it making you a little dizzy
he's beaming at you and his eyes immediately wander to your wrist, not expecting the feeling in his gut next
you're not wearing the bracelet.
jungkook feels the sudden urge to cry even when in public but it's when you grip at his forearm tightly that he stays still, squeaking when you realize his line of thought
"can't wear any jewelry on the field. i-i'm wearing your bracelet as an anklet for the meantime, it's underneath my sock."
...
....
...... oh my god
jungkook's never felt this frozen and euphoric at the same time, sputtering over nothing when your face looks like the furthest thing from joking
you're about to excuse yourself suddenly when your eyes finally take notice what's thrown on his shoulder, something about it being so familiar that it throws you off for awhile
"is that my jersey?"
he nods eagerly to your query, proudly unfolding it for you to see your spare soccer jersey with your surname and number right on it, the exact marks being the same from when you tried to use a laundry pen on it
he didn't get it replicated???
"h-how did you get that? where did you get that?"
jungkook thought you'd never ask, the words he never thought he'd say already leaving his lips
"yoongi gave it to me."
you only have a handful of jerseys on-hand and even if you could always request for more, the ones you have at home are a little more sentimental
you gave jin and yoongs one each from the only several ones you had, and you know yoongi would not give up his for jungkook
but now, you do know that he snuck to your closet and took one to give it to jungkook willingly, trusting him enough to give it to you behind your back
kook's sTILL not fully-forgiven but they're getting there sooner or later
wait why is this making you cry
before you know it, you're pushing yourself to jungkook to hug him tightly, the boy being surprised for a second but ultimately reciprocating once it registers
"i love you too."
.
.
.
.
.
this is the last chronological update for stem koo aka lunchbox lovers!! however, this is not the end of them!! with the end of this chronological series, this means that all the future updates don't necessarily have to be linked — they're miscellaneous and don't have to follow a specific layout like this part of their arc.
with that said, feel free to send in asks on what you want to see from the lunchbox lovers (misc. requests, questions, and everything in between) and i'd love to fulfill them because after all, this series was born purely out of your ideas <3 also pls send in ur thoughts and feedback and love because i have da greatest time reading through all of them!! thank you for all the love for da stem koo universe <3
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infraaa · 3 years
Text
Malleus breaks down… selfishly encapsulated by Yuu. In order to document his affections, he writes them down in an old notebook he forgot about, locking it away for no one else to find. Whats in there anyway?
tw// yandere themes, just a lot of violence and anger and death talk. ya’ll know the drill.
Order Notes: Written in Malleus’ perspective, GN!Reader, I have a tendency to write Lilia with gender neutral pronouns. Headcanon=gender fluid/non-binary bat dad-
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『20 October 2021 ; 16:14 PM』
I remember when I first met them. Their glittering e/c eyes, bright and lovely when they look at me. When they see me. For Great Seven’s sake, I can not even draw a circle to save my life, however, I find myself sketching the shape and shades of their eyes so that I can gaze into them even when I am not present with them. I find their eyes to be so amusing to me, how they become glossy when they blush, how they glare at Trappola and Spade when they act up, when they roll when that little Beastie, Grim, gets all riled up.
I find myself fantasizing about their eyes more and more. I want to have them. To possess them, those mortal eyes. Not literally, of course, in a figurative manner. For them to see me and me alone in this mystical world, in my dark kingdom, where other dragons roam, I want them to be able to look at me, those enchanting eyes, and be able to speak, “What beauty he holds, what grace he carries, my great Prince Draconia.” More shiny than any other gemstone, those eyes. When they look to others, I feel a boil in my chest, like something bubbling. It feels like heartburn, itchy and painful. It makes me upset to see their focus on Kingscholar, that dreaded, angry lion. Or that pompous octopus, Ashengrotto. Those eyes… I see our destiny in those eyes. My destiny. My fate. My life. My love. I will have everything unfurl in my lap no matter what it desires. Even if I must, literally, take their eyes, coiled and dripping with blood, fresh, warm, lingering… I want that life. It will be mine. Soon enough, that life will be mine.
『20 October 2021 ; 16:35 PM』
My mind nearly went out the door when they wore the outfit they wore. They drive me up the wall, as the mortals say. Needless to say, I do not want them wearing that outfit around other men. I don’t like that idea. Those arrogant, perverse eyes on my most precious treasure. Soiling their name, their image. They looked so pure, like a doll dressed in white for a funeral. Something so precious and sweet can be so sinful, I see. They turned their head and looked towards the skies. Even if the skies hold something dear, it is not as dear as when the sky calls its beautiful chant, the wind cascading through their h/l h/c hair. Even their s/c skin looks beautiful in the moonlight, the moon is full of serenades. Just thinking about the moon goddess, Selene, makes me feel unsatisfied. Should I compare them to that beautiful goddess? It is too much for that dear mortal, I suppose. They are truly an enigma even for my intelligent, immortal mind. My retainers are growing wary of me. Wary that I may lose myself to that enigma of a human being. “Fret not,” I say, “I am simply infatuated.” But what is infatuation without interest? I had Lilia capture a photograph of them with their cellular… or… whatever they call it. They printed it out and gave it to me upon my request. If only this photograph was the real thing… yes… the real thing. If only I had them in my arms. If only I had them close to me. If only I had them… all fae are naturally born with the gift of flattery. I’ll ensnare them soon enough. I will have that human in my arms on no time, sooner or later, sooner preferably. And they will not resist. It’s fate. We were destined to walk hand in hand, a prince and princess, king and queen, my other half, standing beside me…
『20 October 2021 ; 19:31』
Shall I fall into madness? Shall I shake and tremble in insanity as I pull my raven hair from my scalp? I can hear each individual strand growing in their follicles. I can hear the soft clash of my eyelashes when I blink, and the sounds that my eyes make when they roll in their sockets. Pray tell, do people creep into your dreams and prohibit you from slumber? Although I need not to sleep, I feel as though I want to simply out of desire. The underclassmen have looked at me, the soft bags under my eyes. I am indeed losing sleep over this human. I do indeed hear them whisper that I’m turning into a maniac. But I do get manic when I cause a stir. I just want a taste of that mortal… But, even if I do, I know the normal sayings, it’s what’s inside that counts, yes? I want to take them for everything that they possess, whether internal or external. I hit my first unfortunate ingrate of a fool today. That Leech Twin, Floyd. He looked at them funny. I let him know just what exactly I think of that. My head was reeling when I saw the red… come out… Sinful choirs sing in my head. “The Red Means I Love You,” I have listened to that song before. How come that managed to encapsulate my emotions perfectly for them and the moment I was in with that senseless eel of a man. The family name Leech makes sense with his personality, that damn man! I WANTED HIM DEAD! RED! SPILLING! SPILLING EVERYWHERE! LEAVING ME HIGH! HIGH I DARE SAY SHAMELESSLY. And Crowley, the Dire President of this prestigious academy, I will see to it that he does not find a way home for that mortal. They are staying with me. They are leaving to the Valley of Thorns with me. It’s in my dreams, my visions at night, presented to me by the moonlight, the goodness of the night, plaguing me with copious amounts of insomnia filled hours within my bed chamber. It’s almost like they’re confining me in my own hell… Is this what it feels like to be desperate? If so… the desperation hurts so good…
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shreddedparchment · 3 years
Text
Spa Day
03/04/2021
Pairing: Clark Kent x Reader          Word Count: 7,559
Warnings: language, depression, past abuse, emotional abuse, fluff
A/N: I wrote this because I have been feeling pretty down on myself. It’s pure self indulgence to make me feel better. I hope it will help someone else and if not, I hope you at least get a smile or some entertainment from reading it. If you happen to reblog, thanks so much for helping me spread my work! xoxo
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You’re awkward, walking in. Feeling out of place.
This place was for special people. Well, people who mattered.
You’re not sure how you got the voucher. It all happened so quickly.
One minute you were sitting in Mr. Wayne’s office, twiddling your thumbs to expend some nervous energy as you awaited your firing then the next you were being shoved out his office door with a gentle but firm hand at the center of your back.
Mr. Wayne had smiled, his face relaxed and amused.
“It expires soon, so use it tomorrow,” he’d said.
“I work tomorrow,” you’d resisted, no intention of losing a full day’s paid work.
“Take the day. On me. Full pay,” As you opened your mouth to protest again, he quickly lifted his hand to silence you politely and tacked on, “There’s no use arguing with me. Now enjoy it or you’re fired.”
He’d shut the heavy wooden door in your face leaving you standing there, stunned. At a loss to think up a reason to not come here today but obviously you’ve failed seeing as you’re here.
“Good morning!” A young woman with soft to the touch looking blonde hair smiles at you from behind the modern pale wooden counter. The white marble top shines in your eyes.
“Hi. Morning,” you sputter.
“How can we help you today?”
She’s so nice. So polite. Professional. This place is super expensive looking. There’s a crystal chandelier behind you at the center of the small lobby space. Chic sofas line the wall behind you, large pots with dragon trees growing tall add a splash of color to the otherwise sterile and plain gray walls.
Despite its minimalist decor, the office exudes money.
You’re almost at the brink of following the impulse that wants to turn you towards the tinted glass door, but before you can make your escape, the receptionist’s kind voice interrupts you.
“Oh! You have one of our platinum vouchers! Lucky you,” she smiles, genuine in her glee. “Shall I take that?”
She holds out her hands, both of them and waits for you to place the thick and shiny ticket-like paper in them.
Quickly she gives it a read, turning it over and then placing it under a UV light by her computer. An image shines out from under the purple light of a shimmering diamond right at the center of the ticket.
“You’ve got the works. Was it a gift?” She looks up at you, not intending to insult you but you can’t help but feel a little stung by her assumption.
You can’t really blame her though. You reserve all of your best outfits for work. Casual yet distinguished pantsuits and skirts with matching tops or jackets.
Today you’ve chosen a simple floor length skirt. It sits snugly around your waist and hips. Your t-shirt, a simple graphic tee with the words “Touch the Radley House YOLO” printed in bold black letters.
“Uh, yeah,” you admit to the girl, wishing she’d just sign you in and let you go about your day. “My boss gave it to me.”
“Lucky, lucky. You must have a really nice boss,” she admires.
“Well, I lost his company nearly a hundred million dollars and he didn’t fire me, so…” you trail off, still lost as to why Mr. Wayne had been so adamant you take some time off and why he’d been so understanding about the Ronson account.
“Oh,” the girl says, blinking a few times as she tries to process what you just said. “A very nice boss then.”
Her conclusion brings a small smile to your lips because truthfully, Mr. Wayne is very kind. You’ve never heard him berate an employee and he’s usually only tough on his business associates. Members of his board and investors. Like Mr. Ronson.
If he wasn’t so out of your league, you’d even consider maybe letting yourself really look at him. He’s hot for sure, but he always seems so preoccupied. Like he has something he’s trying to keep buried.
Nice, but he has secrets. No one’s perfect.
“Well, we’ve got you all booked in. What you’ll want to do is head in through that door on your right, walk halfway down the hall and the lounge room should be there to your left. Someone will come and escort you to your first experience.”
You observe her vernacular. Every word she speaks is rehearsed and probably scripted to a certain point.
“Thank you,” you give her another small smile, still feeling out of place but a little more at ease.
“Enjoy!” she calls as you cross through the heavy wooden door.
It swings shut behind you silently, a soft hiss at it latches.
The hallway before you is just as simple yet chic as the lobby. The colors are less neutral, a calming turquoise with a black base and a thick silver stripe lining the center of the wall at about waist height.
The doors are pale wood, smooth to the touch. You pass several of them as you make your way to the lounge.
Inside the door to your left at the center of the hall you find the lounge room. Which actually turns out to be a locker room. Smaller than what you would have thought with only about fifteen lockers that look more like small safes. Each one has a digital keypad, a fingerprint reader, and an iris scanner.
“Sheesh…” you observe but pick one and move over to it to set up your passcode, fingerprint, and scan your eye so that you can come get your stuff when your day of relaxation is over.
Inside the locker you find a neatly folded outfit wrapped in sanitary plastic. Completely sealed.
Just in case you’re wrong about this being a spot where you can change, you look for a designated changing area but don’t find one.
With no other choice, you place your purse and keys inside the locker, then slowly begin to strip. Shoes, skirt underwear go into the locker but your nerves don’t let you remove your t-shirt just yet. Untucked from your skirt, it’s easier to tell that it’s intentionally oversized.
After another quick anxious look at the door you’d come in through, you hook your hands into the base of your shirt and pull it up...just as the door opens and a large clearly male body steps in.
You gasp, whirling around in surprise to reclothe your breasts.
Cool air blows against your bottom as your shirt also twists with your movement, but you reach back and yank it down.
“Oh, I am...uh, didn’t see anything?” The voice is deep, smooth. It puts you at ease even though you literally just exposed yourself to a complete stranger.
“No, no. It’s fine,” you tell him, voice strained with embarrassment. “It’s my fault, I didn’t know if there was a separate changing room. I just...didn’t see any.”
“Oh, um...it’s the door right across the hall. But you know what? I’ll actually just step right outside and let you finish.”
That’s so nice…”You don’t have to, I can just-”
You turn around to look at him, keeping your hands on your shirt to pull it down. One at the front. One behind.
Simultaneously, though you don’t notice, both your and his jaw drop.
It takes both of you a moment to find your voices and while he speaks, your mind is busy taking in his massive size.
He’s thick. Muscles bulking through the should-be loose wrap top he’s wearing. Like yours it’s a soft peach color, the same diamond shape you’d seen on your voucher under the UV light etched into the right breast.
With the top he wears loose pants, or somewhat loose around his knee and down to his ankles; there’s a pair of charcoal slippers on his feet. His thighs, like his arms and chest strain against the clothes he’d been given.
It’s clearly too small. You wonder if maybe this place doesn’t carry the outfit in his size. It’s very possible, considering his girth.
“Miss?”
His slightly concerned expression brings you back to yourself, now flustered because he’s caught you gawking at him.
“Sorry, I’m-you just surprised me and my brain’s a little-what did you say?”
“I’ll just step outside,” he doesn’t wait for you to respond as he backs up to the door then pulls it open and disappears through it, closing it gently behind him.
“What the hell was that?!” you gasp, angry at yourself for staring.
He’s hot! You couldn’t help it. He also looks familiar, though you can’t place the face. How you could possibly forget a face like that you have no idea.
While you change, you think about the smaller things you’d notice.
His hair is dark. Black. Curls that are carefully kept in place with hair products. His skin is a perfect pale peach. Not so pink as the clothes you’re pulling on, but it falls under the same shade. There didn’t seem to be a single blemish from what you were able to see.
A small tuft of chest hair had been peeking out of the V of the top. His face had been perfect, yes, but kind. There was a gentleness in it. The small curve of a smile had played on his rosebud pink lips. Not thin. Not thick. They were perfect.
He was perfect.
And those eyes...so blue. Like a clear spring sky. So bright and observant. There’s no way he didn’t catch you staring. Shit.
You note as you shove your underclothes into your locker out of where he might see them, that your own outfit for this spa leaves even less to the imagination than what must be the male uniforms.
Where the handsome stranger had pants, you were given very small shorts. Little more than boy short underwear in length. Parts of your bottom were threatening to overflow.
The top, while similar to the one the stranger wore, also came with a bandeau given the unique look of being wrapped around your chest when it so clearly is just one piece. You were expected to wear this underneath the looser wrap top.
Pulling it shut, you’re still tying the top closed around your waist as you hurry to the door where the stranger must still be waiting.
You open it...but he’s gone.
Disappointment floods through you. Surprising you.
You have no reason to want to see him, but you suppose you had just wanted to apologize for the awkwardness.
With a sigh you shut the door and move back to your locker to shove the rest of your belongings in just as a kind looking young woman no older than the receptionist at the front desk comes in with a smile.
“Are we ready for the diamond experience? You’re a very lucky lady!”
Even though you’re still only halfway sure you even want to go through with this whole thing, her excitement is catching and you find yourself nodding and scurrying after her as she shows you down the hall for your all expense paid spa day.
~~~~~~~~~~
You aren’t used to relaxation.
Not to this degree.
A gold facial? Full body exfoliation with sea salt and Indian kama oil? A rain massage which consisted of you being massaged with several different clays as warm water is cascaded down your body? An herbal bath with murky green water that leaves your skin feeling fresh--like mint but for your skin?
It’s too much!
You’re four hours into your spa session and you’re so sleepy you might pass out in this next one.
As you’re escorted by the same young lady who has been tending to you from the beginning, she opens the door of a long room, the outer wall of which is made up of endless glass panels that catch the rays of the sun.
As you step in, you’re assaulted by immediate drowsiness as your entire being is engulfed in slightly sticky heat.
This isn’t a sauna. It won’t make you sweat buckets. But it makes your skin dewy and your eyes droop.
“Oh, wow,” you gasp, suddenly wanting to run before you can collapse to the floor in unconsciousness.
Your escort laughs, “The hot room has that effect on all of our guests. Come, it looks like we’ve got a spot free over at the far end.”
Along this wall of glass, there are lounge chairs with soft cushions grouped in twos, separated by a lattice waterfall panel that tinkles pleasantly as it empties down into a bed of soft pebbles. On the table at the head of these seats is a pitcher of water, glasses, and a set of small handheld fans that one can use to cool off a bit in the heat. Just in case it becomes too much, you guess. Though you can’t imagine it will. The heat isn’t oppressive. Just consuming.
It’s everywhere but it’s not choking or frustrating.
“I hope you don’t mind if we put you next to one of our other single guests? Most of our diamond packages are used by couples, as you can see.”
Your escorts gestures at the chairs as you pass them and sure enough, every seat is taken with couples hiding behind large potted fan palms.
“No, I don’t mind,” you answer in single, as if you have any choice. “How long will I be in here?”
“An hour or so? If you’d like to exit early, there is a small button on the table by your lounge. Press it and I will come take you to your next experience,” she looks back and smiles at you.
You notice that you pass three spots without lounge seats and wonder silently why some of them have been removed. At the end of these empties is where the escort stops. A set of lounges in the very last spot against the wall.
“Here you are,” your escort smiles. “If you need anything, just give us a call.”
“Thank you,” you smile at her and squeeze between the potted palms.
Slightly nervous, you look for your unintended partner and gasp at the Adonis you’d thought you’d lost.
The sound draws his attention and his expression shifts from stoic concentration to soft smile, “Hey, it’s you again.”
It takes you a moment to find your voice because you’re too busy gawking again.
He’s not wearing a shirt or pants. That is, he’s wearing shorts. A lot longer than yours, reaching about the top of his thighs, but still short. Like briefs. It gives you a good view of every single muscle in his long legs and you suddenly envy anyone that’s ever had the privilege to ride that thigh.
What the fuck am I thinking?! You give our head a shake and try to focus on his face as he waits. It’s only a second too late.
“Yeah, hi. Sorry, I-” you avert your eyes and quickly take a seat in your own lounge chair to his left, keeping your eyes on anything other than the mass that is his chest.
Just as you’d thought, it’s covered in a mouthwatering line of chest hair that trailers down onto his stomach and makes an ever so subtle trail down, down, down...down...down…
He chuckles, “It’s alright. It’s only fair you get a good look too, right?”
You’re not even processing what he’s saying, unable to focus for a bit.
“You’re here alone?” It’s more an observation than a question but you answer anyway, grasping at the distraction.
“Yes,” you nod. “A gift from my boss.”
“Me too,” he turns a little in his seat so that he can look at you, but adjusting his angle so that he can still keep his legs up, one propped up as he rests his elbow on his knee. The other stretched out before him.
This draws your gaze back to him and you’re able to pay attention this time and ignore his very distracting body.
“Oh?”
“I mean, not my boss, but it was a gift from a friend. He thought I could use a nice relaxing day.”
The way he says it, sounds like you’re not the only one saddled with what you perceived was a burden or at the very least, a waste of time.
You grin, “Mine too. My boss. I saved the company I work with from a scandal and his idea of repaying me was to give me a spa day. A raise would have been more than enough.”
“Tell me about it,” the man says, smiling with stunning pearly whites.
His smile is gorgeous and you’re enamored again by how sweet he looks.
How can someone look like he can tear the head off a rhino and still look so adorable? It can’t be fair.
“Rent keeps going up and my job doesn’t pay nearly enough to keep up. At this rate I might end up having to move back to the farm.”
“Oh,” you reply lamely, piecing together where he might have grown his sculpted figure. Farm work can be grueling.
He gives you a look, assessing your response then waves his hand gently as if to swat away his complaint, “Sorry, don’t listen to me. I’ve got it better than most. You don’t need to be hearing about my problems.”
“No!” you rush to assuage his worry. “No, it’s okay. That sucks about your job. Is there no chance at a raise?”
“Not exactly, I have a uh, a hobby that keeps me from taking more work and I kind of get paid by assignment. I have a flat salary but working extra would definitely help with the bills.”
“What do you do?” you wonder, trying to picture this guy doing anything other than just looking like a God in a spa.
He could be a bodyguard? They get assignments. Construction? Personal trainer?
“I’m a journalist,” he tells you, speaking matter-of-factly as if it makes perfect sense.
You blink, then chuckle and then laugh once.
“What?” he asks, amused and smiling again as you chuckle. “What’s funny?”
“Nothing,” you shake your head. “It’s just, journalist is not where my mind went.”
He doesn’t seem surprised but he also doesn’t say anything else.
The two of you lapse into silence. It’s not uncomfortable and at least you don’t feel like you need to say anything to fill the dead air.
Twenty minutes pass and you lean back in your chair to relax, sighing lightly and smiling at the immaculate aura that this stranger seems to emanate.
It’s unlike anything you’ve ever felt before.
The longer you lay there, suddenly not sleepy at all, the more your curiosity grows. Turning towards him, you find him already looking at you.
This startles you but in a good way. You smile and the soft curve of his lips breaks into a full toothed smile.
Both of you move your lips to speak, but before you can either of you get a word in a rustle of palm leaves pulls both your attentions behind your seats.
You sit up, twisting a little to look at who’s come, expecting to see your escort or some other spa staff.
Instead you find a woman you’d spotted laying in another spot with who you’d thought was the other half of her couple. Her waist-length auburn hair clings to the skin of her bare shoulders and sides. She’s removed her top, leaving her in her bandeau.
“Hi,” she says to your stranger-wait not your stranger. Shoot.
He looks confused but not unfriendly, “Hello.”
“My friend finally talked me into coming over and talking to you,” she informs him.
“I see,” your-the stranger says.
The girl seems to be expecting something but the stranger just looks up at her expectantly. Awkwardly.
He looks at you and you quickly turn away from their conversation, pushing yourself to the end of the lounge to sit with your hands holding onto the edge, feet flat on the ground.
You try not to eavesdrop but they’re right there.
“What did you want to talk to me about?” he asks her, sounded polite but not uninterested.
You can hear the woman shifting from foot to foot, probably pushing her hips from side to side. Her figure is nice. Not like yours. She’s attractive, in a conventional way. In a magazine accepted way.
Your mood sinks the longer you ponder on this random girl and the stranger. There’s an endless string of disappointments that have built you into this person you are.
Insecurities made worse by words spoken by people that should have supported you or those you thought were on your side. Affections misplaced. Kindness taken advantage of. Betrayal. Worst of all the betrayal. Some small. Some big.
You know that you should be less shaky in your self worth. You know that you’re more than the words spoken and the actions taken that brought you to this point. But how do you turn it off? How to fight the thoughts that bring you down?
It’s not something you can do all at once. You know this. And yet feeling bad about yourself makes you feel guilty because you know it’s bad and that makes you feel worse. It’s an endless cycle.
You’re fully wallowing in your own self-pity before the girl even has a chance to answer the stranger’s question.
“Well, I noticed you came by yourself and I was wondering if maybe you wanted to have dinner sometime? Or maybe coffee?”
You don’t dare turn back, you just resign yourself to a lack of luck and stare out at nothing even though the view is really nice.
“Thank, I appreciate the offer, but I’m not looking for a date right now, I don’t really have the time,” the stranger says, giving her a diplomatic response.
Letting her down without letting her down.
“Oh, well,” there’s a beat of silence. “In case you change your mind, here’s my number. Call me, if you find some time?”
You hear her retreat and the soft shift of what must be a business card against the wood of the table behind the stranger’s chair.
Movement shifts in your periphery and you see that the stranger has moved to the end of his own lounge, mimicking your pose though he’s much bulkier and takes up much more space.
“That was weird,” he says, a small puff of air passing between his lips as he huffs a laugh.
“Why?”
“Well, she just came up to me, out of nowhere,” he clarifies.
“I’m pretty sure that’s not the first time that’s happened to you.”
The stranger seems to pick up on your mood shift, his face etched with concern as he tries to lean forward, head tilted a little as he strains for a better look at your face.
“Actually, that never happens to me,” he says. A lie?
“How about you?” he checks, probing gently to see if he can get you to talk.
“No. Never.”
“But you’re so-”
“I’m nothing,” you interrupt, the words an automatic response as if you’ve been hypnotized into saying those words exactly. A trained response.
The silence is no longer comfortable, but thick and heavy.
“Why would you say that?”
“Because it’s true. I’m nobody.”
It hurts to speak these words aloud. Words that have hurt you in the past. Words that have cut you time and again. Scars left behind by those people that should have loved you but didn’t.
“No one is nobody,” the stranger counters.
He watches you, observing.
You don’t like the front row seat he has to your wallowing. You try to pull yourself out of it but the hole just keeps getting deeper.
“I’m sorry,” you sigh, stealing a quick glance at him.
He’s still got his head tilted a little in pure concentration as he watches you, brow crinkled with focus.
It’s not judgement though, just intent. You can tell he’s really listening and it makes your heart flutter. No one has ever listened to you before. Not like this. Not with a deep desire to understand like he does.
He shakes his head, “Was it the girl coming over?”
You look away, feeling embarrassed, “She reminded me of someone I knew. Someone I dated.”
Nodding, he indicates that he’s listening.
You smile without humor, hurt by the memory, “He thought I should look like her. Or...he didn’t say exactly like her, but he said he wished I looked better.”
He frowns, his deep dislike for your story honest, “He doesn’t sound like a nice guy.”
“No, he wasn’t. He wasn’t like, evil or anything, but yeah. Not a nice guy,” you admit, accepting that in that case, it was definitely your boyfriend’s problem.
“But that’s not it?”
You look at him.
“There’s more to it?” he guesses.
You look out at the scenic view finally, not really seeing it but appreciating the colors at least.
“This spa day?” you begin, stealing another glance at him.
He turns to sit facing you, his elbows resting on his knees, hands clasped as his listening intensifies.
“The only reason I got it was because as I said before I saved the company I work for from being dragged into scandal. I also lost a bunch of money by losing the client but my boss was pretty pleased.
“But the only reason I even touched the account was because I was sorta forced to?” Is that the best way to describe what happened?
“How were you forced to deal with that account?”
“Well, I’m not exactly the best with making friends? I mean, I have had friends before. I just--I got really sick a while back and I lost most of them because I cancelled on plans a lot or I didn’t have the energy to maintain contact? Even texting felt like such a chore. Just the act of responding and-I guess they thought that I thought being friends with them was a chore, and that wasn’t it.
“I just couldn’t find the energy to try to do anything. Some days I wouldn’t even eat because I’d have to get up and make myself food and I barely got up to go to the bathroom much less make a meal.
“Anyway, I just kind of gave up and they did to and now, I don’t really have an in with people? I don’t say much and it’s not that I don’t want to talk, I just don’t have anything worth saying. Or maybe I just can’t think of anything? I don’t know. But it affects work relationships too.”
“How?” he asks.
You take a deep breath, looking down at your hands clinging to the edge of the lounge before releasing it slowly.
“It’s really just me getting in my feelings,” you shrug.
“What you feel is what you feel, even if you don’t think you should. Our pasts can affect us well into our futures.”
His encouragement helps, and you feel a little less vulnerable to share with him.
“I work in the PR department. There are six of us in total. We’re a pretty big company. Multinational big. So there’s one of us for every form of media. Since we all work for the same clients, bridging the gap, we usually spread the workload evenly.
“Or, the other five members of my team do. Sometimes they just forget that I’m there and I usually get stuck with the leftover work. I’m not one to complain, so-” you shrug. “But they forget me for other stuff too. Company dinners. Competitions for prizes in the office. Secret Santa. Stuff like that.
“It makes me feel alone.”
You chance a glance at him, and he’s still watching you but his eyes are far away for a bit as if he’s remembering something.
“I know how that feels,” he nods. “I’ve felt alone almost all my life in some ways. Luckily, I’ve made a few friends to help me see things a little differently but that loneliness will never really go away.
“I understand.”
You smile, feeling more and more at peace again with him. Calm, like he really does get it.
He responds to the shift in your expression by relaxing his own. A small crinkle forms at the corners of his eyes, a subtle curve of his lips.
Now that you’re both feeling a little better, you can admit to yourself that you were jealous. Not just because the girl was everything that you were made to think you should be, but because this stranger, gorgeous as he is, is so nice.
He’s sweet and you want that in your next partner. You want to have someone care about you genuinely. You’re a little ashamed of wanting to claim him. Do you even dare entertain the thought?
“Yeah, I think you probably do,” you smile wider, turning in your seat to face him like he’s facing you.
“Now that you know all about my depression, would you like to know my name?” you ask him, teasing a smile.
He smiles more freely, “On a first date? Isn’t that moving kinda fast?”
Your stomach tumbles, heart sprinting at his words.
“A date?”
He only smiles wider, your heart stuttering before taking off at double speed again.
You tell him your name and then bite your lip, unable to believe your good luck.
“What about that other girl? You told her you weren’t looking for a date,” you wonder.
“Well, how can I be looking for a date when I’m already on one? Besides, how many girls do you think I can come across before I find another one wearing a shirt about my favorite book again?” he asks, all sincerity.
“Your favorite book is to Kill a Mockingbird?”
His smile is blinding.
“It’s really nice to meet you,” he nods, reaching out to shake your hand. “My name is Clark. Clark Kent.”
You take it and almost faint as your head goes dizzy at the soft touch of his skin.
The veins of his forearm bulge as he squeezes gently but he doesn’t actually shake it and instead seems to just hold your hand.
“Wait, I’ve seen your editorials before. You work at the Daily Planet.”
“I do,” he nods.
Your stomach suddenly falls, jealousy raking up along your ribs to settle around your heart to make it ache.
“Aren’t you dating Lois Lane? I thought-you two went to one of my boss’s parties together.”
It had been so long ago. Months and months. You remember Mr. Wayne going on about his friends Clark and Lois. You hadn’t met them, but Mr. Wayne had left to greet them when they’d arrived.
Clark’s own face falls just a tad, a small melancholic shift but it’s not deep. He keeps his smile, though smaller, and nods.
“We broke up last year,” he confesses, still not releasing your hand.
His thumb grazes against the back of it, sending goosebumps up from that point to spread along your arms and the rest of your body.
“I’m...not sorry?” you laugh, unable to help yourself because how can you be sorry about it now?
Clark also chuckles, “You know, right now, suddenly I’m not either.”
Before you can think of something cute to say, your stomach gurgles loudly, announcing to anyone close enough to hear that you’re hungry.
“Oh,” you utter, embarrassed as you finally take your hand back to rub your belly. “Sorry, I guess I haven’t eaten in a bit.”
“They have a menu here, I’ll grab us one.”
He rises and is gone before you can stop him and holy hell does he have a nice butt.
Watching him leave, you contemplate the way he used the word “us” so casually and wiggle with the pleasure it gives you.
As quick as you can, you look for any reflective surface and settle on the window across from you on which you can barely see yourself.
It’s enough though and you quickly go about fixing your hair which is surprisingly not bad even after all the treatments you’ve undergone.
A soft voice calls your name, the young woman who’s been escorting you.
“Hi, are you ready for your next treatment?” she smiles at you politely, kindly even, her body slightly bent down so that she won’t speak too loud and disturb the other people enjoying the hot room.
“Oh, um...I’m actually super hungry and I was going to order something to eat?”
The idea of being taken away to somewhere that you can’t be around Clark devastates you. You haven’t been this into anyone in so long.
“Oh okay! What would you like to order? Did you get a menu?”
The young woman gestures over her shoulder as if asking if she should go get you one.
“Actually-” but you don’t get to explain because Clark suddenly steps up to loom over both of you.
He doesn’t mean to, you don’t think, he’s just so big and he kind of naturally just looms.
“Hi,” he greets her kindly, and she flushes.
You can’t blame her. She takes a step back to put some space between herself and Clark and she’s seriously flustered. He’s hot.
Clark squeezes back by and sits himself in his seat before opening the paper menu and leaning towards you to give you a look.
You read through the choices quickly and nothing looks too crazy.
“Ooh, this one looks good,” you tell him, pointing down at the bottom of the menu.
“Should we get that one?”
“Yeah!” you reply eagerly, excited for the food.
You’re really very hungry.
“Can we get the gourmet pizza?” Clark asks, “And an order of the mini muffins? What kind are they?”
“Blueberry today,” the girl informs him, back to her composed and professional attitude.
“Two orders of those. And…”
“You don’t offer any kind of burger?” you ask the young woman looking back at her.
She smiles kindly but shakes her head, “No, sorry. The closest would be the sandwiches. We have tuna, cucumber, egg salad, and ham.”
While they sound like normal sandwiches, you have a suspicion that they’re going to be fancy in one way or another.
“Can we have an order of the tuna?”
She nods.
“And we’ll get the chocolate fondue, for desert?” Clark adds, folding up the menu and handing it to your escort.
“Alrighty, and for drinks? We can bring just plain water or perhaps some herb infused tea?”
“Do you have any sweet tea?” you wonder.
She nods.
“Two please,” Clark smiles. “Thank you.”
“You’re very welcome,” your escort says and hurries off to put in the order.
Both of you watch her go then when you meet Clark’s eyes, he laughs, just once. Failing to keep it inside.
“Did we order too much?” you wonder.
“I’m hungry too,” Clark assures you.
“I really wanted a burger,” you lament. “I mean, this food will probably be better than some greasy burger but-”
“A burger sounds like heaven. I love greasy burgers. Double meat. Triple cheese. Lots of pickles.”
He makes a funny face, pretending to salivate over the image he’s painted and while it’s a subtle change in his expression, you can tell that he’s more prone to being serious and that makes the gesture funnier for some reason.
You laugh, shaking your head.
He laughs with you, leaning back in his lounge.
You follow his lead, then turn onto your side and shove an arm underneath your head.
He mimics your pose, drawing his long legs up a little to bend them.
“I’m sorry about earlier, with the locker room? I really didn’t know that I wasn’t supposed to change in there.”
Clark’s smiles shift to a soft curve of his lips.
“I’m the one that should be apologizing,” he counters. “I walked in on you.”
“But you had no idea I’d be in there half naked, I kinda just thrust my body at you.”
There’s a beat, he looks down at your chair instead of maintaining eye contact, then, “You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
Your neck is suddenly on fire. Cheeks, ears, the base of your belly. It all burns as your heart stutters.
As he looks up to meet your eyes again, those baby blues burning with a striking spark, something he said when you first came in here replays itself in your head.
You frown, narrowing your eyes at him, “Hey, when I came in here, I apologized for staring at your naked upper body and you said that it was only fair I get a good look too.
“Are you saying you saw me when you clearly said you didn’t in the locker room?!”
Clark averts his eyes, clearing his throat loudly before throwing himself onto his back to stare up at the ceiling.
“I’m gonna have to get my friend something really good in return for gifting me this spa day,” Clark says, pointedly changing the subject.
But he has a point. This has been the best little indulgence you’ve ever given yourself and none of it could have been possible without Mr. Wayne’s generosity.
“Me too. I’ll have to make sure my boss knows how glad I am that he forced me to come here.”
Clark smiles, “What’s your next treatment? Did you pick them before you came?”
“We could do that?” You gasp.
Clark just smiles wider.
“No, I’m just going with the flow. The girl who took our order has been suggesting stuff and I’ve just been going with it.”
“I have a fresh water soak after this. You should join me.” Clark offers.
After the hot room, a swim in some fresh water sounds like heaven. And extending your time with Clark is a definite bonus.
“Aren’t we not supposed to swim for thirty minutes after we eat?” you tease.
Clark chuckles, “It’s a soak.”
Then, his voice shifts and you’re knocked breathless as he basically pleads with you.
“Join me. Only if you want to. I don’t want you to do anything you don’t want to.”
Your brain is buzzing with that pleading voice of his. Gentle urging that betrays his want to be with you rather than wanting to control you.
“A fresh water soak sounds amazing.”
~~~~~~~~~~
Nothing could ever top today. You and Clark stuck together the rest of the day. It was fun getting to know him and exciting because the longer you two spent time together, the closer he sat to you.
As you dropped your spa outfit into a canvas souvenir bag that your attendee had given you at your last treatment--a couple’s massage that you and Clark had talked all the way through--Clark peeked around his own locker door, shutting it.
“So, I was thinking,” he began, moving to lean beside your locker as he towers over you, making you internally swoon with the curve of his lips.
“Yeah?” you urge him on, taking your other belongings and throwing them into the canvas bag along with your spa outfit which is also free for you to take.
“I have some things to do tonight but, how would you like to get some burgers tomorrow?”
“Are you asking me out on a second date, Clark?” as much as you wish you could sound like you were teasing, your excitement betrays you and Clark beams at your tone.
“Definitely,” he says low and deep.
Fuck, you’re totally screwed. You’re falling hard.
You really want to reach up and gently slide the curl falling on his forehead to the side lightly, but you resist the urge.
“I’d love to go out and get greasy burgers with you,” you bite your lip and Clark’s expression shifts a bit more serious but there’s a fire in his eyes, a darkening as his pupils dilate that makes your heart stutter.
“Come on,” Clark nods towards the door. “I’ll walk you out.”
He bumps into you, flirtatiously nudging you as he leads you out and you return his gentle push with your own.
“Had you been to a spa like this before?”
“No,” Clark shakes his head. “I actually don’t get much benefit at these places. It feels good, but it’s not really my thing. You?”
“I feel cleaner than I ever have,” you scoff. “But I could never afford it. Even the cheap places. I’d rather just take a walk around a park or something.”
“Me too,” Clark agrees, smiling.
As the two of you walk out into the parking lot, the cooler air outside feels pleasant against your treated skin.
In the setting sun light, Clark looks especially good and you can’t help yourself. You steal several glances at him with no worry as to hiding it.
You’re happy to see he’s doing it too.
“Oh good,” a familiar voice interrupts, pulling your feet to a stop as you search for your boss’s face. “You two met.”
“Wait, us two-?”
“Bruce?” Clark also stops beside you, eyes narrowed, a crinkle between his eyes.
You look between the two of them, confused but starting to put two and two together.
“Bruce? You-Mr. Wayne is your friend who gave you the voucher?” you realize.
Clark looks at you, his own realizations starting to manifest.
“Bruce is your boss?”
Mr. Wayne moves towards the two of you, hands shoved into his long charcoal gray coat. There’s a satisfied grin on his handsome face, a pride in what you realize must have been a carefully crafted maneuver.
Clark looks at you, a knowing smile on his face as if amused but maybe also a little irritated? Not with you, of course. Clearly his annoyance is with Mr. Wayne.
“You did this,” he accepts, looking back at Mr. Wayne with a tilt of his head.
“I didn’t do anything,” Mr. Wayne denies. “I just gave you two a free day at the spa. Did she tell you why I gave her the voucher?”
“She did,” Clark nods.
“Not every PR rep would overlook a five hundred million dollar investment in order to keep us clean from associating with a suspected illegal arms dealer. Most of them would just look the other way.” Mr. Wayne brags.
A look of understanding crossing Clark’s face and he looks down at you, smiling again as if he’s pieced together a puzzle.
“It was really nothing, Mr. Wayne, and thank you for today. I-I’m actually really glad I came. I would have hated it if the voucher expired.”
“Expired?” Clark asks, turning that confused look back on his friend. “They don’t expire.”
Mr. Wayne clears his throat and turns his full body away from you both, looking back at his shiny expensive sports car.
“Yeah, they do,” he says.
“Bruce,” Clark chides.
“We’re gonna be late,” Mr. Wayne says, ignoring Clark’s reprimand, then looks at you as he pretends he wasn’t just caught in a lie. “Do you have a ride home?”
“Yeah, I brought my car,” you gesture at a modest white sedan parked a few spots over.
“Good. I’ll see you on Monday. Clark?” Mr. Wayne urges him, then walks towards his car.
“I’ll be right there,” Clark tells him, then waits for you to lead the way to your car.
Your heart is still thrumming rapidly with the realization that Mr. Wayne went out of his way to make sure you and Clark met. A set up?
You stop by your car door and unlock it. Clark is quick to take the door from you as you open it and he holds it with his left arm as you turn to look up at him.
“I had a lot of fun today, despite the obvious premeditation of us meeting,” you scoff. “I’m glad I met you.”
You’re quickly becoming acquainted with the gentle curve of Clark’s lips, the peek of his pearly whites as he blushes and meets your eyes.
“I’m glad Bruce interfered,” he nods. “I’ll see you tomorrow for burgers?”
“I wouldn’t miss it,” you assure him.
After a moment of hesitation, he reaches out and places his hand on your bicep then traces the length of your arm until he can take your hand.
It sets your skin on fire. It makes you dizzy and breathless.
“You have my number,” you remind him, eager to reconnect if he has the time.
He gives you that pearly smile, blue eyes full of excitement, “I’ll call you later. Tonight?”
You nod, “Tonight.”
He waits for you to get in, shutting the door for you when you’re sitting.
You lower the window as he backs away, “Bye.”
“Bye,” he nods, then turns to meet Mr. Wayne at his car.
“What?” Bruce asks, “It’s been months. She’s perfect for you.”
“Really?!” you can hear Clark demand, more annoyed with his friend again than any consequences his actions might have brought, however positive.
“You like her, don’t you?” Mr. Wayne asks.
“That’s not the point, Bruce. Boundaries.” Clark reminds him. “Why did you lie to her?”
“I knew you were coming today, I had to get her here,” Mr. Wayne explains. “Besides, you’re-”
As their doors shut, you’re cut off from their distant conversation. You shut your window, watch them speed out, and smile to yourself at the unexpected turn your spa day took.
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you’re someone i just want around: IV
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“I had a few, got drunk on you
And now I’m wasted
And when I sleep, I’m gonna dream of 
How you tasted.”
— Medicine, Harry Styles
A/N: if i said i’m apologizing for the way i left off ch3, yes i did ❤️ no i didn’t ❤️ it was fun ❤️ as always, feedback is greatly appreciated!! and if you enjoy the piece, please reblog it!!! it keeps content creators motivated!! without further delay, hope you enjoy what’s in store for Sherlock and Watson this chapter cause it’s uhhhh quite a bit of uhhhh ~stuff~ 😌
harry’s condo : ysijwa masterlist : andrea’s masterlist : leyla’s masterlist : ysijwa playlist
word count: 26.4k
content/warnings: a mild addiction to sexting, some pretty sparkly lingerie, a very interesting photo, a strange but satisfying gift, rough sex and degradation, pillow talk about the validity of the men in Twilight, the satisfying gift being put to even more good use, Y/N going over to Harry’s apartment for the first time, mild mentions of blood, and an impromptu Hamilton re-enactment amidst more lemon blueberry pancakes
///
For the next three days, the sexting grows more frequent. 
Harry feels somewhat humiliated by it, really. He’s an adult— a full-grown, two hundred and nine year old man— and trading nudes with a simple girl shouldn’t be getting him as worked up as it does. He should know how to handle his hormones better, and the thing is, he usually does. But no one in the last few centuries has made him feel as desperate as Y/N does; he hasn’t felt this helpless for someone since he was alive. The vampire just wasn’t prepared to handle the needy responses she so easily yields from his body and he’s horribly rusty on how to skate this thin sheet of metaphorical ice. It’s like he can feel it cracking and crunching beneath his feet, but he has absolutely no power over how to stop it. Any minute, it’s bound to take him under, and he has no choice but to allow himself to drown in it. 
The following seventy two hours are full of so many dirty promises and explicit images, his phone might as well be a porno hard drive.
After coaxing Y/N into a few orgasms through the phone and receiving just as many in return, a dangerous game is set into motion that Harry knows is probably unhealthy not only for his self-worth, but for the sensitivity of his anatomy. He can only get off so many times before his joints are begging for a break. 
He wakes up Wednesday morning with a stiff ache running along his inner thighs and ebbing across the underside of his balls, but there’s an undeniable contentment stewing behind it. He doesn’t truly mind the throb, comforted by the fact that Y/N is probably facing similar issues at the moment. He finds himself smiling coyly as he flips an omelette onto one of his marble-print platters, recalling the events from the night before. 
According to what he’d heard on the other end of the phone, present throughout the array of shaky gasps, cracked whimpers, and wet sounds of pleasure that had echoed from the speaker, Harry had made Y/N squirt. 
That was a tremendous stroke to his already huge ego. The idea that he’d been able to make her cum so hard that she’d soiled her brand new sheets had been circling around his head for the last couple of hours, fluffing his confidence. It’s a milestone achievement, to be honest. He’d done something that very few men have the skill to achieve in person, meanwhile he’d done it just by using his voice and extensive imagination. The arrogance he’s sporting right now is more than justified. His cheeks are starting to ache from how hard he’s grinning.
The vampire is so lost in his recollections that he nearly misses the chime of his phone, the unique ringtone that beeps out being as welcomed as ever. 
Harry scoops up his device while spooning a piece of his green pepper and mushroom egg dish into his mouth, chewing thoughtfully as he swipes into Y/N’s text conversation. He smoothers the giddiness fluttering in his stomach; he’s not a child. 
As it turns out, he’d killed those butterflies for no solid reason because the instant her message pops up, they come right back to life. 
Morning! Thought I’d show you what I’m planning on wearing to work today. 
Harry roughly swallows down his breakfast at the attachment following the caption, a shiver coiling down his spine. “Fucking hell.”
The photo is a mirror shot, taken in her tiny bathroom. It’s a full body image where she’s clad in a matching set of bra and panties, the material sparkly bright red lace. The bottoms are high-waisted, hugging her tummy and hips in a way he deems perfect, the lace decorating her skin beautifully. The bra is see-through, so he has an unrestrained view of her chest and he doesn’t know why, but he thinks he might love the way her breasts look in lingerie more than without it. Make no mistake, he’ll willingly drool over her no matter what, but there’s just such a refined beauty in seeing her figure in such an elegant piece. She’s like a present set out for him to unwrap, preferably with his teeth. 
Then he notices the garters and the next forkful of food lodges in his throat. They hug around her legs deliciously, the bands settled midway down her thighs as the straps run up the sides and clip onto the hem of her panties. Yeah, he would definitely use his teeth. 
After gawking at the artwork for a minute, Harry finally gathers himself enough to type back a decent reaction.
I’m pretty sure that outfit doesn’t apply to the workspace dress code. 
Y/N shakes her head in amusement at his response, giggling softly as she finishes shimmying into her black skinny jeans, buttoning them over the skimpy lace. 
I’ll cover up for the sake of the customers. But it’s just such a nice set, I figured someone else should get to appreciate it with me.  
Harry sets his utensil down on top of his plate, omelet only half eaten. His appetite has molded into a very different type of hunger. He pads out of the kitchen, feeling the ten AM sunlight filter through the glass wall of his living room and warm his bare chest and back. He heads for the bathroom that branches out of the entrance corridor, coming to a stop right in front of its mirror. He begins to clean up his appearance, combing his bed head into a presentable state (he hadn’t slept, per usual, but rolling around his pillows last night while he indulged fantasies about Y/N had done his curls in something fierce), fixing his royal blue briefs along his hips and dragging the waistband down to show off the dip of his prominent pelvic bones.
Once the immortal is done, he taps back with eager strokes of his thumbs. 
I can’t believe you’ve never worn that for me. That’s a criminal offense. Literally worth capital punishment. 
Oh, really? Capital punishment? And who are you to decide my verdict?
I’m the executioner, obviously. I’m in charge of dispensing the verdict and I promise you, I’ll see to it that you get what you deserve. It’s my civic duty.
Y/N scoffs at his quip, tugging her navy polo shirt over her torso and quickly running a brush through her hair. She puts it up into a neat ponytail, sighing lightly as she stares at her tired reflection. She wishes she could ditch work for the day and entertain more conversation with Harry, but she literally can’t afford to.
Well, you’re gonna have to wait while I go perform my own type of civic duty. Making the world a better place, one grilled panini at a time. 
Harry’s lips jolt. She’s so clever and witty, he doesn’t know how she could possibly be from such a dull, monochrome town. 
I understand. Justice calls. But before you go, can I send you a picture of what I’M wearing today? Could use a few style tips. 
That’s pretty ironic coming from someone whose last name is literally ‘Styles.’
I know, I know. But even fashion icons have their insecurities sometimes. 
Fair point, nobody’s perfect. Lemme see your OOTD, then.
The outfit of the day appears to be no outfit at all, according to Harry’s picture. It’s taken on a mirror, like her own, and it depicts him standing with one hand holding his phone in front of his face while the other seems to be doing jazz hands down his body playfully. He’s wearing nothing but a pair of deep blue briefs (probably because he’d completely ruined the maroon pair he was wearing last night, if his broken moans and heavy panting had been any indication) and they hug his frame flawlessly. The fabric is bunched around his lean thighs, tiger head tattoo peeking out to accompany the rest of the collection, which includes all the inkings running the length of his left arm as well as the butterfly and swallows across his torso. His v-line is evident as ever, dipping below the elastic band teasingly. His chest is broad and his biceps are taut, despite the fact that he’s not even flexing. He looks like a Greek statue and Y/N is positive the higher powers designed Harry with that specific thought in mind.
Y/N doesn’t realize drool is gathering in her mouth until it tickles the inside of her bottom lip. She snaps her jaw closed, clearing her throat sheepishly. Over a minute has passed of her just ogling and she can feel heat layering across her cheeks. She knows Harry probably has the cockiest expression on his face at the moment, obvious in the tone of the next comment he delivers. 
Damn, it’s that bad, huh? Guess I’ll have to change. 
No, it’s perfect. Simple, but effective. Very professional. 
Why, thank you! 
My pleasure.
Here, take this as a token of my appreciation. Hopefully it can help get you through the day. 
This specific photo is taken from an above point of view, as if Y/N were looking down at Harry’s body along with him. His pectorals and stomach muscles appear more defined, tattoos darker and skin more evidently sunkissed. Lower down, there’s the obvious outline of what lies within his boxers, snuggled up against his thick thigh and tempting her to let out a soft whine. Then, resting casually against his abdomen is his free hand, sporting a thumbs-up that gives a purposefully goofy vibe to the risky image. He’s such an idiot. 
The mortal’s answer is just as silly and lighthearted as his gesture. 
Thank you, I’ll keep it locked in my heart forever. 
I wouldn’t want it any other way. 
That’s the first interaction of many that further opens the door to their virtual sex life. Things hardly stay that innocent. 
That night when Y/N gets home from work, they undergo another round of phone sex. It starts off the same: cheeky banter that leads to cheeky pictures that eventually leads to utter filth. 
And that’s how they spend the next few days— taking care of each other’s needs digitally until Friday rolls around. There’s plenty of those encounters, but there’s definitely favorites. 
A session during one of Harry’s self-care baths, when he puts her on speaker and she talks him through tugging one out while the scent of lavender salts— which he’d chosen because they smell like her— leave his heated skin feeling soft and supple. Another instance where he makes her orgasm while she has gotten bored watching a scary movie marathon on her couch, the screams of the horror film mere background noise compared to all the sweet nothings Harry huskily mumbles into her ear, his dominant voice filtering through her headphone and instructing her on how to make herself feel good.
Harry messages her at three A.M. at one point, wide awake as ever, all of his thoughts occupied by the concept of Y/N laying on her tummy between his thighs and sucking him off at a slow pace. He can practically see her small hands wrapped around his girth, stroking up to meet her pretty lips, her tongue lapping at his tip eagerly as she whines around a full mouth. She’s always just so eager. Even at the crack of dawn, she’s awake by some miracle, and happily willing to delve into that fantasy with him. Her soft, timid tone drifts across the shells of his ears, explicitly sketching out how she’d take him all the way down her throat until she gags, and how she’d kiss all over the head of his prick just to smear his precum over her lips to then lick it off, and how she’d rock against his lap fast and hard while he takes her nipples between his teeth. How she wouldn’t stop until he’s dripping down her thighs and groaning into her throat. How she’d let him fuck her as many times as it takes to tire himself out. 
Harry obviously repays her, and it comes in the form of him painting out a scenario where she’s gotten home from a long day at the café. He tells her about how he’d be there waiting for her in nothing but his underwear, sitting back on his elbows in her bed, touching himself over his briefs just at the thought of pleasuring her. About how he’d lay her out and taste every inch of her body with his tongue, and how he’d run his teeth across her inner thighs tenderly while his fingers play with her clit, and how he’d have her ride his face deep and sloppy until she’s shaking and sensitive. How he’d tie her to the bed and toss her legs over his shoulders while he pounds her into the mattress, marking bruises across her neck as she sucks on his fingers and tightens around his cock like “the snug little thing you are.”
They even take their fun out of the confines of their houses and into public settings, just to give it an adrenaline high. Those situations are foreplay; it’s how they prep each other throughout the day for when they’re both finally alone and can truly help one another to the fullest. 
It happens Thursday on two occasions. 
First, to Y/N, who is sitting in the backroom on her lunch break, though she’s barely touched her food. She’s much more interested in what Harry has to say. Much more interested in how he says he wishes he could be there with her right now. That she could sneak him in through the back door of the restaurant and they could lock themselves in that tiny supply room, making sure no one would disturb what he’s about to do to her. That he would drop to his knees and drag her jeans down her legs, pressing damp kisses in the denim’s wake, biting hickies in the areas he knows she loves to receive them. He would mount her knees over his shoulders and bury his face between her thighs, looking up at her through heavy lashes as he licks into her desperately. He would have her grab onto his curls and guide his tongue just the way she likes it, and she’d have to bite into her cheek to keep from getting caught. 
He talks about how he’d take her against the supply shelves, one hand clamped over her mouth while he pants praise into her ear, her body jolting roughly upwards against the surface as she clings to his back. How he’d hold her up with the other arm and slam her down onto his cock, cooing things like, “Gotta keep quiet for me, sweetheart. Can’t make you cum if we get caught.” and “Such a filthy girl, sneaking me in here just to fuck you. Baby just wants to walk around the rest of the day full of me, doesn’t she?” 
That fantasy leaves her in a bothered haze the rest of the work day. It’s bad enough that she almost drops her tray three different times and has to ask multiple customers to repeat their orders. 
Y/N gets back at Harry, though. That revenge is the second occasion. 
The vampire had mentioned that he would be going out with his friends that evening to a bar and she takes full advantage of that. When the picture comes through, Harry nearly spits out his Manhattan drink. 
He’s sitting in a booth surrounded by his entire group and he’d been talking shit with Niall about golf. The vampire doesn’t care for the sport, but Niall loves it, and Harry loves getting on Niall’s nerves, therefore it’s all pretty self-explanatory. Mitch and Adam join in, with Mitch obviously supporting Harry, when he randomly decides to check his notifications. Even in the shrunken little banner, Harry can immediately tell the photo is graphic. Xander asks if he’s alright, telling him he looks freakishly pale and to get his eyes under control because they're in public. Harry blinks the red from his irises, hurriedly excusing himself and clambering up from his seat, jetting across the restaurant towards the restrooms. It’s occupied, much to his luck, so he settles for simply pressing his back against the wall of the corridor, leaning his head against the bricks and taking deep breaths to calm the raging in his stomach. He gingerly opens the message and his knees nearly give out. 
The image is taken from the back, probably using a timer. Y/N is wearing one of her big tees and another pair of cheeky lace panties, but this time around, they’re pastel peach and crotchless. She’s bent over with her ass up and spine arched, knees parted for balance, her shirt bunching downwards due to the angle. Her arms are pulled behind her back and her chest is flushed to the bed, wrists crossed submissively as she gazes at the camera over her shoulder. There’s an unmistakable sparkle in her eyes and he can tell she had sent this now on purpose just to fuck with him, knowing good and well that he was out and occupied.
The shot is more than he can handle and he has to swallow down the urge to stomp out of the bar, get into his car, race to her flat, and make her rethink her decision. Preferably, in the form of harsh spanks and overstimulation. He can see everything— the intentional rip at the crotch of the panties are meant for that sole reason. The closer he looks, he comes to realize that she’s wet, which in turn means she had been touching herself. She’d set this up perfectly, knowing that he’d easily be able to deduce that fact and that it would haunt him for the rest of the night. 
The monster releases a quivering exhale, typing back slowly and carefully, sight bleary. 
You’re going to regret that. 
Pinky promise?
///
When Harry arrives at Y/N’s apartment the next night, as he has for the last three Fridays, he doesn’t saunter up to her door and bang on it angrily. He doesn’t grab her by her hair and drag her into her room, how he’d intended. He doesn’t even have a single cinch in his sculpted brows. 
Instead, he raps softly on the door with one jeweled knuckle and waits calmly. 
The human goes to answer, her stomach twisting in excitement at all the possibilities of what punishment she might face for her antics. A small, sly smile buckles the corners of her lips at the thought, her fingers trembling as they wrap around her cold doorknob. She expects to find a furrow-browed, intense-eyed, red-faced Harry behind the threshold, who would shove past her, nab her by the arm, and throw her onto her bed. She expects him to yank his belt from around his hips while a distinct darkness swallows his emerald irises, his mouth curling into a sinister grin. She expects him to roughly command she get on her hands and knees, his palm finding the back of her head to shove her face-first into the sheets while he rips her panties down her legs and drags the cool leather of his accessory over her backside tauntingly.
What she gets is something— and someone— completely the opposite. 
When her door swings open, Harry is standing standing there, sure. But instead of looming over her with flaring nostrils and cruel intent, he’s decided to lean against the door frame with his arms folded casually. His body is completely empty of tension, his ankles are crossed offhandedly, and a small, bright red paper bag full of sparkly black tissue paper is hanging off his wrist. His expression is a relaxed facade of indifference, lips set into his usual signature smirk, no explosive emotions present whatsoever. 
That startles Y/N. This has to be an act; it feels like the calm before a violent storm and it has her shifting in her socked feet. Did he...Did he forget what she did? 
There’s no way he forgot. It was too brazen a move to dismiss.
Harry steps forward into her home, comfortable enough that he no longer has to wait for an invitation. Y/N moves to the side to let him through, hesitantly closing the entrance behind him, contemplating the man as if he were a ticking bomb. She does a quick sweep of his physique, looking for some other clue as to what he could be plotting, aside from the mysterious gift bag in his hand. He’s wearing a pair of flared denim jeans, a white tee with a royal blue cartoon bee printed in the center along with the words Enjoy health! Eat your honey! surrounding it, his white Vans, and an oversized colorful patch-work cardigan. The outfit is surprisingly domestic compared to his usual taste, but she finds it’s easily one of her favorite fits on him. He just looks so boyish adorable. 
The human comes up with nothing suspicious, glancing back up to lock eyes with her guest. Harry beams at her innocently and she knows for sure he’s planning something, but she can’t place what. 
“I got you this.” The vampire speaks up first, holding out the paper bag towards Y/N with his index finger, bouncing it encouragingly. “Take a peek.” 
The girl accepts the gift gingerly, giving him one more hard look before breaking away to investigate what lies beneath the tissue paper. She pulls out a small cardboard box, her eyes squinting slightly as she reads its print and surveys the label. The image on the surface appears to be of five silicone finger gloves, each about the size of a thumbtack, tiny metal plates embedded into the pads. She’s voicing her curiosity before she’s even finished studying the container. 
“What...What are these?”
Harry rolls his eyes jokingly, tapping the object for emphasis. “Read the fine print, love.” 
Y/N focuses on the region he’d pointed out, reciting aloud. “‘Vibrating silicone finger gloves. For the use of personal pleasure or with partners.’”
Then it all clicks. 
“Oh my God, you got me— what?!” Y/N’s head snaps up in shock, mouth parted and brows creased. “Harry, what?”
The young man laughs airily, gently opening the seal of the box in her hands, which she is now holding as if it were a weapon of mass destruction. It’s such a weird present to give in general, moreso all out of the blue, so she can’t be blamed for her reaction.
He uncaps the packaging, rummaging through its contents and pulling out two of the tiny rubbery gloves. They’re transparent and ribbed, obviously meant to deliver as many sensations as possible, and they’re about two inches in length. He slips them onto his index and middle finger, making scissoring motions for the purpose of symbolism, but mainly just to watch Y/N fidget. “I remember how you said you don’t have sex toys because you’d never really thought about buying any, so I went and picked these up down at my favorite shop. Jessi said they’re good for beginners.”
“Jessi?” Y/N’s voice is tight. She’s not sure how to respond to this; she’s never been in this situation before. No one has ever just given her a sex toy as if a were a candy bar. “Who’s Jessi and why do they need to know about my sex life?”
“She’s the manager.” Harry says matter-of-factly. He doesn’t seem to find anything strange about this encounter. “She helped me pick out my first pocket vag, so I trust her with my soul. Here, look. You just slip them on and—” He makes finger thrusting motions in the air, wiggling his digits playfully. “Big O. Not as good as what I can give you, obviously, but close enough.”
“Harry, you do realize this is a little…odd, right?”
The boy blinks at Y/N blankly. “What? Why? Sex is literally the basis of this whole thing.” He signals back and forth between them with his gloved forefinger. “It’s really not that weird at all, if y’think about it.”
“I just...it’s like…” 
Her argument fizzles to an end the longer she stares at him. He has the most wholesome expression painted across his handsome features, his eyes glossy with excitement. He looks genuinely elated about the present and she can’t find it in herself to question him any further. As unorthodox as this may be, it’s the first true act of kindness anyone has shown Y/N since she had moved to California. It’s the first time anyone has given the girl anything without her having to request it. She comes to the realization that Harry really is the only friend she has at the moment, and she refuses to pick and prod at that, lest he retract from her on the grounds that she’s ungrateful. Yes, this is a little atypical, but so is their whole dynamic. In his own twisted way, this is how Harry shows his friendship. 
The more she ponders on it, she starts to understand that this truly is something she should accept. He went out of his way to get her this gift, which solidifies their acquaintanceship. It’s sweet.
“You know what, never mind. Thank you! I love them.” 
The giddy smile that cracks his face melts her heart. “I’m glad to hear you say that.”
Harry then softly grasps her hand with his, tugging her down the entrance hallway, his intentions set on her bedroom. His voice takes on a deeper sultry twang, the corners of his mouth twitching suggestively. “Because on my way here, I was thinking, yeah? And I figured: who better to teach you how to use these than the person who picked them out.”
“Of fucking course.” Y/N huffs in amusement, shaking her head but allowing herself to be guided forward. “I should’ve known you had an ulterior motive.” 
“Heyyyyy!” Harry’s whine is offended, but the coy simper dimpling his cheeks ruins any defense he could possibly try to spin. “This isn’t an ulterior motive, it’s simply a supporting one.”
“Right.” Y/N states flatly, shuffling forward slowly as he backs down her corridor, momentarily glancing over his shoulder to orient himself. “Buying a fuck buddy a sex toy is totally selfless and mutually exclusive of the agreement.”
Harry takes a turn and crosses the threshold into her bedroom, releasing her arm and instead, he opts for wrapping his fist into the loose material of her large Transformers tee, twisting the fabric around his knuckles and giving it a sharp yank. She stumbles into his chest and almost drops the box. 
The vampire gazes down at her with half-lidded eyes, long lashes tempting and plush lips the color of roses. “I never said it was mutually exclusive. I just said it wasn’t meant to be evidently inclusive.” 
He takes the box from her grip, sliding it onto her nightstand so that any obstacles between them are eliminated. He beckons her closer with a flick of his wrist, feeling heat erupt across his chest as her palms slap down against it to steady herself. She’s always so warm, almost like a furnace. It’s a nice contrast to his ever-present coldness.
Harry’s cupped fingers nurse the slope of her jaw, tilting her chin up to level his, Cupid’s bow ghosting over her own teasingly as a grin threatens to betray him. His accent is thick, heavy with condescension. “Now do you want me to fuck you or not?”
Y/N gulps audibly, the sudden jump in her heart rate causing Harry’s cock to give a foreshadowing twitch in his designer jeans. Her eyes soften with a form of weepy desire, head nodding in his grasp. 
Harry’s top teeth catch on his lower lip as he appraises her from over the crest of his defined cheekbones. “I don’t think I heard you, pet. Must be the AC draft.”
The mortal’s eyes fall shut as she composes herself, a shaky sigh faltering past her nostrils. She tips forward onto her toes, connecting her itching mouth to his. Harry allows it, listing his head to the side to grant her more access, his free arm roping across the dip of her spine and pressing her front flushed to his. The kiss is soft and heated, full of drunken tongues and muffled whimpers. It’s tame compared to most of the others they’ve shared, but Harry likes it. It’s sloppy and intimate; only the beginning of what he knows will be a long night. 
Her words sting the ridges of his lips, hot and bated. “I want you to fuck me.” 
Harry speaks into her mouth, tone gentle but packing a punch. “Get my belt off for me, will you? I’m tying you to the bed tonight.”
He doesn’t have to ask twice, a dark chuckle vibrating across his tongue when her fingers immediately begin to fumble with his belt buckle. 
Once Harry has looped the leather tightly around Y/N’s wrists and has knotted them to one of the wooden railings of her headboard, he sits back on his heels to admire his work. Y/N is splayed out across her mattress with her arms suspended above her head, bare thighs clasped in anticipation as her t-shirt gathers around her waist. Her hands are curled into fists, nails digging into her palms as she watches Harry leisurely shrug off his cardigan, keeping eye contact with her the whole way through. His tattoos stand out against the buttery light of the single lamp on the table, tanned arms flexing sinfully. 
He shifts around, laying down onto his stomach and coasting his palms up her quivering legs, kissing over her kneecaps and along the crease of her inner thighs, bunching her shirt further up her body as he goes. As soon as he spots the first garter, he blacks out for a millisecond, vision washing red. 
“Fuck, wait— did you…?” His voice is strained and desperate as he shoves the rest of her clothes up her torso, pulling her shirt over her head and letting it rest at her elbows. He hums appreciatively when he’s met with the full cherry-colored lingerie set from a few days ago, garters and all. “God, you did.”
Y/N’s gaze falls timidly, a sheepish smile brushing over her face. “I thought you’d want to see it in person, since you seemed to like it so much.” 
“Mm...” Harry struggles to swallow, fingers hooking under the straps that clip to the hem of her underwear, pulling the fabric from her skin and letting them snap back into place. He revels in the tiny noise she lets slip, the pads of his digits now toying across the frilly bands encircling her upper legs. After a thoughtful heartbeat, Harry speaks up, wistful but vehement. “I’m going to make you soil your sheets again.” 
Y/N bucks a tad at his promise, wrists stressing against the leather belt, but Harry’s practiced enough bondage in his lifetime to know she won’t be getting out anytime soon. He parts her knees open with his palms, dragging his silicone-covered fingers down her clothed clit and tutting when she lets out a stuttery gasp. 
“Always so sensitive, aren’t you, angel?” The vampire pets at her core patiently, heat pooling at the base of his abdomen as he feels her panties damped with every stroke of his touch. “Christ, you’re already soaking through.”  
“Want more.” The girl’s plead is strangled as she actively forces herself to keep her legs wide open, knowing that if she were to allow them to snap shut, Harry would only pry them apart again. “I’ve been thinking about this all week. Please.”
“All week?” Harry drags tongue across the inside of her thigh, nipping at the flesh tauntingly, the amber specks in his eyes glittering amidst his lashes. He continues to rub through her underwear, drinking up all the little noises streaming from her throat. “Tread lightly, dove. You’re swelling my ego.”
“I just…” Her hips give another jerk when he wriggles two rubber-clad fingers into the crotch of her bottoms, spreading her open just a bit and grinning against her skin at how wet she’s become. “I just need it hard tonight, Harry. Need you to leave me sore.” 
“I always leave you sore.” The monster reasons mockingly, taking one of the garters between his teeth and tugging, releasing so it stings her like before. “You’re gonna have to be more specific.” 
Y/N trembles out an exhale, gathering herself enough to give him what he wants. “I need you to fuck me like you hate me.”
Harry grabs onto either sides of her panties, slowly peeling them down her legs and then scooting closer forward, planting an open-mouthed kiss right onto her bare clit. She mewls in return, her restraints creaking the bed. He continues pressing messy wet pecks to her cunt, feeling her tense up each time his soft lips suckle her fervently. 
“Is that why you sent that picture?” Harry wonders aloud, pausing his motions and raising one eyebrow at her. “Because you wanted me mad?”
The human nods, face wracked with guilt. It’s cute that she feels bad, especially because Harry had, in actuality, enjoyed her little stunt. Seeing her bent over like that, in a position that shows she couldn’t wait to please him— that she couldn’t wait until Friday came around so he could do to her whatever he deemed fit...It was the best form of edging he’s ever experienced. But for the sake of giving her what she wants, he’ll bite the bait. 
Harry rises up onto his knees, parting her thighs further as he fits himself between them, the pads of his gloved digits dancing across the thick of her damp clit. He bends down until his nose smudges over hers, the breath of his low words hot against her parted mouth. 
“Well, it fucking worked.”  
Harry taps his index and middle fingers against his palm in one quick flick and the tiny metal plates situated along the tips purr to life. He sinks knuckle-deep inside of Y/N, cold rings catching on her folds as he curls upwards to get at that special spot that resides along the pit of her tummy. The moan she releases it so raw and broken, it sends a zip of lightning through his veins. 
He fucks her like that for a while, with his strong chest poised against her heaving own as he marks love bites onto the cleavage spilling from her lace bra, his skilled fingers pumping into her at a harsh pace that has her legs shaking on either sides. He thumbs over her clit messily, the silicone molds sending waves of vibrations through her clenching walls as he relentlessly toys with her g-spot, her arms thrashing against his belt. Fragmented sounds of bliss freely stream from Y/N’s mouth without shame, his name intermingling amongst the whimpers as her head throws back against the headboard. Harry grips her throat in one hand, holding her to the sturdy surface as his other bobs between her thighs roughly, the bed groaning as a result of their intense actions. His wrist begins to ache from how hard he’s going, but the tears trickling out from the corners of Y/N’s eyes and the way she’s panting into his mouth are enough to keep him going.
“Look at me.” Harry squeezes her jugular tighter, garnering attention. She forces her eyelids open, inhales hiccuping when he braces his cool forehead to hers, his irises the color of a forest at midnight, pupils blown out of proportion. His teeth dig into her bottom lip just to feel it swell, a growl stirring the gravel in his chest. “Is this what you wanted?”
“Y-Yes.” Y/N boggles her head feverishly, glimpsing down over her sweaty cheeks to see the way his veins are chiseling along the forearm that is flexing between her drenched thighs. “Fuck, it’s so g-good.”
“Yeah? How about we go a little higher, hm?” Harry scrapes the pads of his fingers against that spongy place inside her, pressing the vibrators down and the motion clicks the toy into a higher level of intensity. 
Y/N writhes in his grasp, back arching off the headboard as deeper, more concentrated rumbles lap throughout her body. “Harry— I— that’s— God, just please!”
Harry takes ahold of her jaw as he continues finger-fucking her without remorse, his short breaths warm against her burning lips. “That’s my girl. Taking it hard and loving every second.” 
Y/N’s eyes lull back into her head. She doesn’t know why, but hearing Harry call her his girl satisfies her in a manner so deep, she didn’t know it existed. Just hearing him recognize her as his— as something he claims for himself, almost like an extension of who he is— stirs a foreign form of fulfillment in the back of her mind. 
“I’m—” The girl chokes on her sentence, finding it difficult to concentrate with so much pleasure coursing through her system, as well as with Harry painting hickies across the side of her strained neck. “I’m gonna cum.”
The immortal’s voice is stern and authoritative. “No, you’re not.” 
“I am, I can’t hold—”
“Yes,” Harry’s grip firms, pace sharpening into unapologetic slams, “you can. And you will. If you cum before I let you, you’re not getting anything else from me for the rest of the night. Do I make myself clear?”
Y/N’s cunt tightens around his fingers, warning him that she’s about to peak. “Harry, I’m sorry—but— but I—”
“Do I make myself clear?” 
Y/N has no hope that she can keep it in, but she adores the darkness swirling in Harry’s eyes at the moment and she’ll do anything if it means getting to witness it for a while longer. “Yes.” 
“Good.” She winces when she feels his teeth skim her earlobe, his whisper dripping with arrogant amusement. “I told you I’d make you regret it.” 
And he really does keep his oath. Minutes simulate hours as Harry continues to flirt her just along the seams of relief, pulling her back every time he sees her about to tip. Whenever he feels her begin to spasm around his slick fingers, he gives her a cautionary quirk of his brows accompanied by a testing, throaty, “Don’t you fucking dare.” or a simple, silent shake of his head. By some miracle, she manages to reign herself in every time, but each ruined orgasm makes it harder and harder to stifle the next. She doesn’t know how many times it happens; she stops counting after four. 
After what feels like decades of torture, Harry finally releases his hold around her jugular, allowing her to properly gulp air for the first time in a while. He sits back against his heels, pulling his hand from between her thighs with a sarcastic sympathetic hiss. “Poor thing.” 
He watches as a trail of her juices strings from his digits to her cunt, eventually snapping in the middle as he lifts his hand to study his work. Her release drips down his knuckles and palm, gleaming in the dim lighting. A mildly sadistic glint washes over Harry’s irises and for a split second, they look almost red, but Y/N dismisses it. Her brain is too fogged to trust right now. 
The boy’s sight flickers past his hand to where Y/N lies limply, wrists bruised from the bonds, arms quivering weakly, and legs trembling in overstimulation. He’s never seen her look more beautiful than now. 
He locks his bright eyes to her exhausted own, watching them shatter to pieces when he pushes his drenched fingers past his pillowy blushed lips. His lashes flutter as her taste washes across his tongue, sweet and decadent as always, a soft groan thrumming deep in his throat. God, he can only imagine how delectable her blood must be at the moment, honeyed by the plethora of endorphins he had repeatedly coaxed into her. He can't wait to feel its warmth fill his mouth later tonight.
Harry removes his fingers with a wet pop, licking across the back of his hand with finality and giving her a daring once-over. “Do you still want my cock? Or are you too sensitive for it, darling?”
He sounds so conceited and self-assured, it causes Y/N’s pride to flare. She wants to make him eat his stupid words.  
The mortal licks her chapped lips, wetting her dry throat and clearing it softly, wiping away the sweat on her forehead with her shoulder. “I still want it.” 
An impressed expression decorates Harry’s features. “You think you can take it?”
Y/N’s jaw clenches with dedication, her thighs spreading open a tad more and she wills herself not to flinch. Her chin cocks upwards. “I know I can.” 
Harry’s brows kink challengingly, a borderline evil smirk sewing onto his face. “Let’s see, then.” 
As it turns out, Y/N can take it. However, she knows for a fact she won’t be able to walk right for at least the next week.
Harry lowers his jeans and kicks them off, reaching into his navy briefs and tugging himself out, giving his length a few pumps for good measure as he shifts forward toward her. He flips the girl onto her belly as easily as he’d turn a sheet of paper, tying one arm around her hips and lifting them up as he slides a pillow below. He situates her accordingly onto the cushion, her ass slightly elevated to give him more range of depth. He pats at her backside lightly, telling her to part her knees and she does so obediently, gripping onto the leather strap around her wrists anxiously when she feels the bed shift with his weight. Harry lowers himself over her body, the tee covering his broad chest soaking up the thin sheet of sweat on her back. He moves all of her tangled hair to the side, burying his fingers into her roots and yanking her head back cheekily. He runs his nose across her damp cheekbone and chuckles when she jumps slightly at the feathery sensation. 
“You’re pretty stubborn, aren’t you?” 
Y/N gnaws on her bottom lip as she struggles to swallow, throat taut from the angle he’s put her in. Her voice carries a confident bite, despite her compromisable position. “I like to think I am, yeah.” 
“Well, you know what that makes you, right?” Harry murmurs as he lines himself up with her entrance. 
“Mm-mm. What?” 
The vampire presses a lingering kiss to the tittering pulse in her temple, feeling it thunder below his skin as he forms his next comment slowly with an ominous edge. “It makes you a brat.” 
He feels her heartbeat trip. 
“And you know what I do to brats?” 
Y/N shakes her head as much as his dominant grasp will allow, body tightening in suspense. 
“I fuck them until they break.” 
Y/N learns that he’s telling the truth. The first thrust Harry delivers is swift, hard, and unbelievably deep; it causes her to let out a choked scream that no one else has ever drawn from her before, except for him. It’s like he can tap into certain aspects of her body she was unaware of; parts of her waiting for the right person to come along and reveal them. She feels that stroke rip into her tummy, but the pain of his size is something she’s become accustomed to in the last three weeks. She hardly feels it anymore; it had molded from a sharp throb to a dull ache, due to how often she’s experienced it. 
Harry doesn’t waste any time, quickly picking up a sloppy, adamant pace that has her hips bouncing against the mattress. He twists her hair around his fist, mouth pressed to the side of her head as his hot pants of exertion send a prickling through her scalp. His other forearm keeps him anchored to the bed as he pounds into her with absolutely no hesitation, the sound of skin slapping, cracked whines, and raspy grunts filling the tense atmosphere of her chilly room. 
“Is this what you were hoping would happen when you sent that slutty picture?” Harry grits out, short nails digging into the comforter beneath. “Wanted to get me all riled up just so I’d do your back in?”
Y/N mewls weakly in response, hands clinging to each other within the makeshift cuffs. 
“If you wanted me to fuck you like I hate you, you could have just asked. I’m more than happy to give you whatever you want. You don’t have to tempt me.” The vampire gives a particularly deep slam, laughing breathily when the girl’s back instinctively arches forward, paired with a watery yelp of, “Oh!”
Harry’s tongue grazes across the shell of her ear, teeth catching the skin. “But since you did, I’ll give it to you just— like—that.” His thrusts match to each word, fingers coiling harder into her locks. “You deserve it. Especially when you had the nerve to act like such a spoiled little brat right to my face.” 
Y/N’s not sure what emboldens her to speak, but her snarky remark is already halfway down her numb tongue before she can stop it. “Don’t pretend you didn’t like it.”
Harry hums tauntingly, circling his hips in long strides that urge a series of fractured whimpers to scrape out of Y/N’s sore throat. “Say it again. Go ahead, say it. I want to see you try.”
She remains silent, spine shuddering as she bites down on her tongue to avoid making any more noises that might condemn her.  
Harry roughly cranes Y/N’s neck to the side, buttoning their lips together in a filthy kiss that has her cheeks boiling. “That’s what I thought. The only thing that sharp tongue is good for is licking down my cock.” 
She gasps against his mouth shakily, tears of sheer bliss gathering along her waterline. “You’re such a fucking asshole.” 
Harry can tell her comment holds no true malice behind it; she’s too sweet on him— too whipped on what he gives her— to ever mean it. She’d only said it to provoke him into a power dynamic struggle. But the thing is, Harry’s dealt with feeling powerless before, so he had spent years teaching himself how to win. How to always win. 
“Am I, now?” His next line dismantles her entire plan. “Would an asshole let you cum?”
And just like that, her whole demeanor crumbles. “I take it back. I’m s-sorry.”
Harry releases her hair and nips at her ear mockingly, beginning to withdraw himself. “Oh, I think it’s a bit too late for that, minx.”
“No, no! Harry, please. I’m sorry. Genuinely. I promise I won’t say it again. Just…” She tugs helplessly at the belt restraints, trying to twist around to look at him directly. Her voice is wringed out. “Just please.”
The boy pushes a few stringy curls out of his eyes, pressing his tongue into his cheek coyly as he glances down, suggestively smoothing one hand over her ass. He gives it a firm squeeze, lifting his palm teasingly and feeling her tense in anticipation. “Do you want it?”
Y/N glimpses at his bejeweled hand with hunger, then back at his eyes. “Yes.”
“Tell me you want it.”
“I want it.”
“Sorry, I seem to have forgotten what ‘it’ was, exactly. Jog my memory, will you? What is it you want?”
Her irises harden in spite at his shit-eating comment. He’s well aware of how shy she can be when it comes to admitting she wants a spanking, and he’s playing that to his advantage. He’s swimming in the way she squirms. 
“I...I want you to spank me.”
He tsks, shaking his head as he twists his HS rings around to face inwards. “You forgot something.” 
Y/N’s fingers tighten into begrudging fists. “I want you to spank me, please.”
“There’s a good girl.” His low, accented purr sends electricity through her nerves. “You’re so cute when you beg.”
Harry’s hand comes down swiftly, digits fanned out so that all of his rings print across her backside. It’s not hard enough to hurt, but strong enough to leave a satisfying sting. He loves the way she jolts forward with a hushed curse of surprise, and he adores seeing the shape of his initials marked across her clammy skin. It’s poetic, almost.
“So pretty.” His mumble is wistful as he massages deeply over the region he had just bruised, but it holds unyielding authority. “Whose is it, doll?”
“Yours.” 
“And don’t you fucking forget it.” The creature lifts one palm to do it again, pausing once more just to rev her further. He reaches forward with the other, shoving her face-first into the mattress to get her back to straighten out. “Look forward and don’t make a single sound.”
Y/N obeys, but manages to sneak a peek at his reflection through the waxy wooden surface of her aged bedframe. He looks so good perched behind her with bare heaving shoulders, looking down at her exposed figure over the crests of his sharp cheekbones, brows furrowed into a starved expression that gives away he’s enjoying this probably more than she is. Her voice comes out small and weak. “Yes, sir.”
Harry’s entire face tightens at the word and she feels him throb against her backside. 
“Now beg me to let you cum.”
///
The next morning when Y/N’s eyes flutter open to the grey light streaking in through her curtains, the first thing she senses is a pair of eyes staring at the side of her face. 
She turns her stiff body over toward where the sensation stems and sure enough, she’s met with a pair of sea glass irises filled to the brim with humor. Harry’s laying on his side with his hands tucked below one of her pillows, tousled ringlets sticking up in wild tuffs (thanks to the activities they’d engaged yesterday), he’s completely bare since he likes sleeping nude (though he’d had the decency to cover himself with sheets from the waist down), and his voice is slower and raspier than usual (a result of being dormant for the last eight or so hours). 
“You drool in your sleep.” 
Y/N tucks her hands against Harry’s cold pectorals, snuggling deeper into his chest and pinching at one of his nipples in playful revenge. “No, I don’t.” 
“Yes,” he reaches up and shoos her hand away, proceeding to wipe at the side of her mouth, where dried spit had accumulated. He makes a theatrical gagging face, cleaning his thumb off across the collar of her t-shirt. “You do.”
Y/N sighs in exasperation, making a bold leap to a different topic to avoid talking about her embarrassing sleep habits. “Didn’t anyone ever tell you staring at people while they sleep is weird? Like, serial killer weird?” 
Harry tucks a few matted strands of hair behind the human’s ear, thumbing over her cheekbone tenderly. He hardly ever indulges in such actions, simply because they’re typically reserved for actual couples, which he and Y/N are definitely not. But last night— after he had finally finished being a prick and allowed her cum along with him, and after she had fallen into the bed with exhaustion taking her under, and after he’d had his greedy fill of her blood for the week— he’d gotten bored of playing on his phone. He’d burned through three cold case documentaries on Netflix and played enough Mario Kart to memorize the race charts; it had grown old quickly, and he eventually just locked the device and placed it on her nightstand. He spent the next hour staring at her hideous ceiling, and the one after that fantasizing about taking down her tapestry and burning it in the oven. And finally, after hours of mindless daydreams and letting his eyes chase the city lights dancing across the walls of her room, he had settled onto his side and watched her sleep. 
Harry did it simply because he had nothing else to distract him. He figured it would eventually bore him enough that maybe— just maybe, if he was lucky— he would fall asleep alongside her. But he didn’t, so he just ended up gazing at her slumbering face until dawn. He had been surprised by how oddly beautiful Y/N looked sleeping— how relaxed and tranquil, with her features soft and skin seemingly made of flawless porcelain. That intrigue had bled into the moment they share now, resulting in his touch drifting down the curve of her jaw and across the faint dimple on her chin. He follows the slope of her neck and admires the smoothness of her flesh with the ridges of his fingertips, hearing her breathing stutter ever so slightly. His heightened senses make it feel as if he’s running his digits over velvet and the only concept he can compare it to is touching forbidden artwork at an exhibit. It’s exciting, but he knows that if he keeps going, he could end up getting himself into a crock of shit. 
When the pads of his fingers land on two prominent purple bruises he’d forgotten existed, he’s broken from his soft stupor. He retracts his touch as if she were made of iron, forcing himself to ignore the pout that automatically plumps her delicate lips. 
He clears his throat awkwardly, a tight chuckle stringing his vocal chords. “Staring at someone in their sleep seemed to work just fine for Edward Cullen, though.” 
Y/N snorts sharply, rolling her eyes up towards her headboard. When she sees his belt is still hanging off of it from the night prior, she hurriedly glances back down, pretending not to have seen it. 
“It’s funny you say that because as I recall, he literally admitted to being a murderer. I believe his exact words were,” she exaggerates her voice into an angsty cry, grasping at her chest dramatically, “‘This is the skin of a killer, Bella!’”
Harry bursts into boyish giggles, falling fully onto his back and swiping his palm up his face, fingers remaining perched over his closed eyes as he laughs. He sighs airily, shaking his head as an afterthought. “What a moron.” 
“Truly. His dad was hotter.” 
“Way hotter.” Harry agrees passionately, burying his hand into his messy curls, attempting to comb out some of the tangles. “And he was a doctor. What a man.” 
“Bella really fucked that one up. She had a midlife crisis over choosing between a sad vampire who looked like he had chronic constipation, and a yappy dog with a shirt phobia. All when Carlisle was right there. Brain damage, honestly.” 
“A moment of prayer for the mentally incapacitated. Couldn't be me!”
“Couldn’t be me, either.”   
“Fuck, yeah.” Harry throws his hand up, inviting Y/N to give him a high five. “To good taste.”
She gladly delivers. “Exquisite taste.”
An instance of comfortable silence suspends between the pair of lovers, filled with the soft thrum of the air vent and the distant chirping of birds outside Y/N’s windowpane. She traces her index nail over the wings of the swallow tattoos along Harry’s collarbones, seeming to be deep in thought. She then speaks up once again.
“Emmett was pretty hot, as well.” 
“You know what? I’m happy you mentioned that ‘cause— full disclosure here— I’d ride him like a fucking bull.” 
Now it’s Y/N’s turn to explode in a fit of giggles, nose scrunching and eyes crinkling shut as she loses herself at Harry’s graphic confession. 
“Why are you laughing?!” The fact that he sounds genuinely appalled only spurs her sounds of glee. “Don’t tell me you wouldn’t take that chance if you got it. Like, okay, he’s an airhead, yeah? I’m aware. But fuck’s sake, look at his body. I’d happily let him beat me at arm wrestling if it means I get that celebratory dick afterwards.”
The mortal manages to calm down a handful of heartbeats later and Harry feels strangely proud of how he’d made her pulse spike. 
“You’re valid for that, don’t worry. I couldn’t have said it—” A single giggle interupts her sentence, but she reigns it in before it can spiral. “I couldn’t have said it better myself. Literally. There’s no way to express it better than exactly how you stated it.” 
Harry smirks softly up at the ceiling, folding his free arm behind his head as the other wraps securely down Y/N’s back, absentmindedly rubbing in gentle soothing circles. “My mind. It’s amazing, innit?”
“It’s definitely something.” 
Another span of cozy quietness fills the atmosphere of the room, longer than the last. Harry doesn’t mind. He finds it appeasing, and he continues to delight himself with running his touch up and down Y/N’s spine. He’s not sure how much time passes, but he’s aware that it’s probably a bit. His theory is supported by how he witnesses the beam of watery light that filters over the duvet gradually fade from silver to a sunflower yellow, indicating full daybreak. 
Even then, he doesn’t say a word, too caught up in this innocent bubble of domestic bliss to pop it so suddenly. He just lays there and listens. Listens to the birds harmonizing with each other across the branches of the tree outside. To the steady breaths that fill Y/N’s lungs with cool air, faltering past her nostrils in the same manner and fogging the metal of his cross necklace. To the faint sound of footsteps trotting down the staircase outside her apartment, and to the vague spritz of the sprinkler system going off at the front of the complex. To the distant honking of car horns in traffic, and to a random conversation between two friends as they walk past the pavement just under Y/N’s balcony. He hasn’t felt this at ease in eons. 
Harry just allows himself to grow in tune with the world around him— a world he’d been convinced was against him for the longest time. A world he was convinced stole his happiness and replaced it with the shackles of a blood-driven afterlife, for no other reason than because he’d been in the wrong place at the wrong time and met the wrong person. But now, he feels like he’s in the right place, at the right time, spending it with the right person— or at least a half-decent person— and he doesn’t want to let it slip between his fingers so soon. He wants to bask in it, even if he knows it’ll pass. 
And eventually, it does pass, and Y/N is the one who brings it to an end. 
The girl slowly peels away from Harry’s side, his lips dipping downwards slightly at the loss of the warmth she radiates. He thinks she’s about to get up to probably go use the bathroom or to make breakfast, but instead, she just bends her upper body over the edge of her bed to retrieve something from the floor. She comes back up with the box he’d brought her the evening before (which had ended up on the ground as a result of her bed rocking violently), setting it in the small space between their laps. She then returns to her place cuddled into his torso, looking up at him with an expression that Harry can only interpret as expecting. 
The vampire glances down at the container and then back up to Y/N’s face, raising his eyebrows curiously, voice tinged with comedy. “What did I say about bringing sex toys to the dinner table?”
Y/N stares up at him flatly for a second, fighting off a smile. “I just wanted to thank you again. It’s nice of you to bring me a present, even as strange as this one.” 
Harry sucks at his teeth, waving a hand dismissively, blinking down at her with slyness sparkling around his pupils. “What are friends for, if not for buying you vibrating finger gloves and then fucking you with them until you cry?”
Despite having been acquainted with Harry’s crude humor for three weeks now, it still manages to make Y/N’s cheeks sizzle. It could also be the fact that this is the first time Harry has openly accepted Y/N as a friend. It’s the first time he’s ever mentioned her name and that word in the same sentence, meaning that she can now shake a weight off her shoulders— a weight that had insisted he was only using her for sex, that he would eventually grow bored of her, and that he would throw her away once he was done. It’s good to know that’s not the case, and that the friendship aspect of their agreement is true to its name. 
“Right.” Y/N’s smile is full of so much genuine warmth, Harry feels like she could outshine the sun. “What are friends for, if not that. Thanks, Harry.” 
He wonders what she’s thinking, and he finds himself wishing that he had the one valid trait that idiot Edward Cullen possesses: mind-reading. But he doesn’t have it, so he simply returns her gesture and skates the conversation how he best deems fit. “You don’t have to call me ‘Harry’ all the time, you know?” 
Y/N’s brows cinch in entertained confusion. “What would I call you, then? Sherlock?” 
Harry scoffs lightly at the inside joke, shrugging one shoulder casually. “I mean, you could, if you want to. It might take some getting used to, but I think I can shoulder a full-time second identity. Just for you.” 
“How chivalrous.”
“You ain’t ever met a man like me, sweetheart.” He boasts in an over-the-top American southern accent, prying another round of laughter from Y/N, similar to the one before. “But you could also just call me ‘H.’ It’s what most of my other friends use.” 
“H.” Y/N repeats, getting a taste for the new nickname. It’s simple, unlike him, but it somehow fits. She then recalls something from a show she’d watched when she was younger and she can’t help but bring it up. “So, like, just your first initial? Like in Gossip Girl?”
Harry’s face immediately drops at the comparison she makes to the cringey teenage soap opera. “You know what, I take it back. You’re not allowed to use it. Illegal. Banned. By an official court. Gavel and all.”
“I’m just making a point!”
“Yeah, a shitty one.” 
“Oh, whatever. You’re just mad I debunked your little hipster alter ego. ‘That’s a secret I’ll never tell. Xoxo, H.’”
“Restraining order.” Harry pinches at one of her love handles, an evil grin dimpling his cheeks when she squeals. “Actually, nevermind. We’re going straight to the electric chair. Immediately.” 
“You don’t get to decide my punishment, remember?” Y/N slaps at his wrists, trying to ward off his attacks but failing miserably. “You’re just the—stop!— just the executioner.” 
“That’s right. I get to strap you to the chair.” Harry finally lets up on the tickling, his lighthearted grin taking on a slightly seductive hue as he momentarily glimpses upwards towards where his belt is hanging. “Though you’d probably like that, wouldn’t you?” 
“Fuck off.” Y/N smothers her palm against his face, breaking eye contact as she feels her ears bristle with heat.  
“Mm, exactly.” Harry gnashes at her hand playfully, but she manages to yank it away before he gets a bite in. “You can’t even admit you like being called a whore.” 
“Hey!”
“What?” The vampire gives her a cocky look, wagging his head knowingly and then mimicking her voice in a higher pitch. “‘I’m just making a point!’”
“You’re a dick, you really are.” 
“And yet you still ride mine, so who’s the one with the real issues here? Specifically, daddy issues.”
“I’m done with this conversation.” Y/N huffs, returning her attention to the box beside her thigh, muffling the twitching across her lips. 
She takes the cardboard into her hands, tracing over the small flap used to pry the top open. Harry watches her with interest, pondering as to what could possibly be scurrying around her skull that she seems so caught up with the context of the gift. He’d gotten it because he knew they would both benefit from it. It’s as simple as that. 
“You know,” she starts, but her gaze remains glued to the box, “I feel kinda bad ‘cause, like...You got me this gift, I have nothing to give you in return.” 
Harry’s face contorts into a silly frown for a moment, tone humorous. “It’s fine, Y/N. You don’t have to give me anything back. I got it ‘cause I knew we’d enjoy using it together, and because this way, you have something to play with when I’m not around. And you can send me videos of said instances. It’s truly a win-win. A double-ended gift.” 
“I suppose.” She mumbles softly, continuing to pick at the lip of cardboard sticking out. “But I feel like it’s only fair that you get to use it, too, don’t you think?”
And then the reason she’s insistent about this dawns on Harry. The way she’s avoiding looking at him directly, how her heart rate is slowly ebbing upwards, how she is gradually scooting closer to his body, how he can feel her thighs are clasped tightly below the comforter. How the scent of honey and lavender has intensified. How she keeps glancing towards where the sheets are crumpled messily around his hips in a haphazard attempt to remain civil. 
When the monster speaks, it carries all the arrogance brought forward by his discovery. “If you wanna give me a handjob with the toy on, just say so.” 
The human’s head snaps upwards, her expression one of utter alarm at his lewd comment, but he can see right through her act. It’s obvious that was her intention all along— the desire in her eyes is poorly masked. She looks so adorable, pretending not to know what he’s referring to, her palms gripping the box slightly tighter than before. 
Harry twirls a strand of her hair around his finger nonchalantly, giving it a jesting tug. “I just find it funny how much of a horny menace you can be.”
“What—?”
“And it’s not even ten A.M. yet.”
“What do you—?” 
“Y/N,” Harry sighs tiredly, giving her an omniscient look, “I’ve slept with you enough times to know when you want something. It’s written all over your body language and you’re pretty shit at hiding it in your eyes. Just admit you want to and I’ll let you.” 
The faux shock slowly melts off her face, replaced by sheepish humiliation at being so easily sussed out. She chews on her bottom lip pensively, struggling to sew together the appropriate words to communicate the very inappropriate activity she wants to engage in. Harry has to withhold from leaning down and taking a bite from her tempting mouth.  
She inhales a deep breath through her nose, puffing it out slowly and tapping her fingers across the box nervously. Her voice pipes up so softly, it’s almost inaudible. “I want to give you a handjob with the toy.”
Harry gently cards his fingers into the mussed roots along the back of her head, using that hold to guide her sight upwards until it meets his. He leans down, smearing his lips over her own, feeling static pass through the ridges of their skin. “That’s all you had to say, darling. Go ahead, then. Make me cum.” 
Y/N swallows thickly, lashes fluttering bashfully as she pastes her mouth to his in a soft kiss. It’s a simple action with just their lips and nothing else. No tongue, no teeth, no sucking, nothing sloppy or desperate— not yet, anyways. He can tell she does it as a way to ease herself into this. She wants to, that much is arousingly obvious, but for some crazy reason unbeknownst to him, she’s still shy about it. That’s what happens when you come from a conservative raising: you get intimacy issues. He of all people— with his Victorian era background— would know. 
The hand Harry has cupping the nape of her neck shifts over a smidge, ending up splayed across the side of her face. His palm rests on her cheekbone and his fingers in her locks, his wrist cradling the back of her skull as he patiently deepens the kiss. His chest begins to heave slightly, a familiar sensation already frothing at the trench of his stomach. Harry can feel Y/N’s clumsy movements as she unboxes the vibrators, digging through the packaging and trying to slip them on blindly, not wanting to break away from his embrace. The way he’s flirting his tongue along the inside of her top lip is just too consuming to leave. 
After a few seconds of grappling and a string of annoyed curse words, Harry giggles lightly into her mouth, nudging the tip of his nose across the bridge of hers. The jade tint in his irises is waltzing with amusement, all at her expense. “Sometime today, love.” 
“I know, I’m sorry, I just— I can’t— they won’t—” The mortal releases an irritated growl into their kiss, reluctantly splitting away when it becomes clear she won’t be able to get the rubber gloves on without giving the task her full attention. “God, I’m such a...Sorry.” 
Harry rolls his eyes in mirth, pecking sweetly along the angry creases present over her forehead and between her brows. He thumbs over her cheek affectionately to soothe her nerves, his other hand scratching distractedly at the back of his neck. He filters curls through his fingers as he waits, bicep jolting in the process. “It’s fine, I’m just teasing. I’m not going anywhere, babe.”
“Thanks. Just give me—” The girl pauses her actions for a second, jutting her chin back up towards him and locking the vampire into another quick kiss, solely for the purpose of keeping him interested while she figures herself out. She breaks away again, returning to her mission. “Just give me a minute.” 
Now that she can see, Y/N successfully wriggles all five of her fingers into their designated molds. She prods at them gingerly, copying Harry’s actions from the night prior, using that experience as a manual. The mini-vibrators purr to life, a buzzing sensation trickling down her fingers. She glances back up at an awaiting Harry, who gives her such an easy, good-natured smile, she instantly reaches up and glues their mouths together again. 
“You’re so eager.” The boy grins into the kiss, jumping a bit when he feels her tittering fingers duck beneath the covers around his lower torso. “It’s hot.” 
“I just want to make you feel good.” Y/N mumbles, one palm braced to his strong shoulder as the other rides down his bare abdomen. She can feel his grip on her hair tightening the closer she gets to his cock. “That’s all.” 
“Guess I’m just the luckiest— shit.” Harry’s quip is interrupted when Y/N wraps her digits around his length, giving it one slow, testing pump. His jaw drops open and he begins panting into her mouth, the corners of his lips ticking upwards into a smirk as an intense pleasure swells between his thick thighs. “Jesus fucking Christ, that feels— fuck, that’s incredible, oh my God.”
“Yeah?” The human asks timidly, gazing up at him dreamily from below her lashes as his eyes lull back into his head. “Not too much?” 
Harry loves how attentive she is— how she’s checking to make sure he’s alright before continuing. If he had a heart, it would surely be glowing right now. 
Harry gulps down the lump in his throat, voice more strained and needy than she’s ever heard it. “No, I’m good, I’m good. Keep going.” 
Y/N gradually sinks her palm back down to his base, feeling his cock twitch desperately as the vibrators work their magic. She slowly slinks back up to his tip, thumbing over it carefully, pressing the toy on her thumb pad right over his slit. The garbled moan that emits from Harry is a sound her ears will never forget. It’s a sound she wishes she could record and listen to on a loop. 
“Fucking hell, don’t— please, just— oh—” Harry stutters through a plead, voice bleeding, naked chest now heaving wildly against her own. His hips buck forward into her hand, but she maintains a steady grip, keeping the vibrator pressed to the center of his cock’s head. 
“Don’t what?” She whispers into his mouth, suckling at his Cupid’s bow and reveling in the little broken noises he pours onto her tongue. 
Harry’s breaths are shallow and pained, the grip on her hair stronger than she thought possible as the fingers of his opposite hand yank at his own feverishly. He’s barely able to choke out his next sentence. “Don’t stop.”
“I won’t.” Y/N begins to fish for a solid rhythm, her strokes setting into medium pace and gauging the receiver's reaction. “How’s that?” 
Bright colors web across Harry’s eyelids and he feels like his soul is being torn from his body. “Y-Yeah, that’s perfect, baby. It’s so good— you’re so good.” 
“I am?” Y/N swipes her thumb over his tip again, and when he whimpers brokenly against her lips, she does it again. It urges the same exact reaction, but more shattered. So she does it again. And again, and again, and again. And each time it happens, his hips jerk more violently, chasing her intoxicating touch. She can feel Harry’s precum drip down his length and leak between the cracks of her fingers. 
“You are, you’re just so fucking good to me.” Harry’s spewing words at this point, brain half conscious, half floating in bliss. Whatever dam of common sense holds his mind together crumbles, all of his thoughts rushing out in the form of jumbled phrases and cracked whines. “You get me going like nothing else, pet. You get me going so easily, it’s embarrassing. You make me cum so hard, it feels like I’m touching h-heaven. And your mouth— God, y-your mouth. It’s the best I’ve ever had. It’s so soft and warm, and your lips are so pretty and silky. I could kiss you for hours. And your tongue— you know how to use it so well. You lick me once and I’m already on edge. And every time you get down on your knees, I think I’m gonna pass out.”
Y/N sighs shakily at Harry’s string of confessions, staring up at him with wide eyes as his own stay shut loosely, long lashes perched on his rosy cheekbones, handsome features slack with euphoria. She doesn’t halt her motions, continuing to pump him excitedly. The girl passes her thumb over his tip every time she gets to the top, and gives a hard squeeze every time she thunks down against his base, twisting her wrist as she glides back and forth between the two points of reference. That combination seems to work well, evident in the steady stream of vulgarities falling from Harry’s swollen lips as he thrusts upwards to match her pace. His groans splash across her tongue, traveling down her throat and burning into her stomach. She wants him to cum probably more than he does.
Y/N glimpses down, watching her sheets tent as she works Harry over, the outline of her knuckles pressing into the turquoise fabric. It’s such an erotic scene and she knows it’ll be branded across the front of her brain for years to come. She cranes her neck back up to look at the vampire, her breath catching in her lungs. He looks so pretty with his dark pink lips parted in pleasure, his damp ringlets matting along his sweaty hairline, his structured jaw ticking, and his usually sharp traits softened by ecstasy. She’ll do anything to make that image last.  
“Tell me more.” Y/N murmurs, swimming in the praise he is so willing to dish out. 
His eyes flicker for a heartbeat and in that instance, they look oddly darker than normal. Almost crimson, but she knows it’s due to the shadow of his lashes. The words that spill from his mouth next make her forget all about that occurrence, his voice melodic and dark, sticky against her wet lips. 
“Your hands are one of my favorite things about you, I think. They’re smaller than mine and I love how your fingers don’t touch when you wrap them around my cock. I love how they leave my back raw with scratches, and I love how they look tied to the bedpost. I love it when they press flat against my chest when you ride me, and how you lean back on them when I’m on my knees with my head between your thighs. I love how they yank at my hair when you’re about to cum, and how they grip my upper arms when we make-out. I love how your nails dig into my thighs when you're going down on me, and how they look fisting at the sheets when I’m taking you from behind. And I love how they feel tugging me off, like you’re doing now. I just love how perfect they are— how perfect you are.” 
Y/N is left speechless, Harry’s monologue ringing in her heated ears as he gazes at her intensely amidst heavy, barely-cracked eyelashes. His broad chest gasps for air and he takes it upon himself— despite his wrecked appearance— to smush their mouths deeper together, pooling moans across the roof of her own.  
“I’m—” His breathing throttles, voice coming out softer than she’s heard it in the last three weeks. “I’m gonna cum.”
Y/N nods her head numbly, strokes becoming lazy and fast, eager for him to finish. “I want you to. I want you to cum for me so bad. Please?” 
Harry’s hips writhe in a tell-tale sign that he’s about to tip. His whimper tastes sweet on her tongue, the meaning behind it pure syrup to her ego. “You’re the only one who makes me feel this good.”
The mortal whines gently in return, eyes falling shut as she feels him grow heavier in her palm. “You’re the only one I want to make feel this good.” 
The knot of white hot pleasure in his belly begins to unravel, his entire spine shuddering as a result, all strain beginning to wash out of his system in spurts if blissful electricity. He can feel his orgasm racing up his prick, pulling his composure along with it. He gives one last jerk against Y/N’s cupped fingers, feeling her press her vibrating thumb over his slit one more time for good measure. When the first milky ribbon spurts out, that’s when he feels it. 
Harry’s eyelids fly open in alarm as black veins protrude along the whites of his eyes, all his muscles contracting at once, defense mode activated. Y/N’s lips are on his neck. 
His first instinct is to do what he always does and guide her away from that sensitive, highly forbidden area. His fist tightens in her hair and he’s about to yank her back up to his mouth when suddenly, the icy tension present in his veins disappears. It’s replaced by a soothing warmth, which travels through every crevice in his body and kindles his climax, his impulsive hatred for being touched in that specific region funneling away completely. He can’t remember a time where this has happened before. 
Harry’s grip loosens hesitantly as he treads into this unexplored territory, allowing her to continue suckling along his throat. The sensation would usually garner a reaction similar to that of a molten metal brand being placed on his skin, but now— for some startling reason— he doesn’t feel any contempt. He just feels relaxed and cradled in the best way imaginable. The impact is pleasant this time around, and he finds himself wanting more of it. So, he lets her give him more. He lets this strange girl kiss and gasp and lick against his jugular while she finishes getting him off, his own desperate sounds of need bouncing around the brick walls of her bedroom. He lets her coax wave after wave of cum out of him, feeling it splatter against her bedspread and coat over her hand. He whines and grunts into the hair along the crown of her head, tears blearing his eyes as her scent of sugar and flowers clouds his mind. And when his release finally sputters to an end, he lets out an elongated groan so deep, it makes his chest ache.
“Fuck. You’re...You’re an absolute angel.”
Y/N draws her hand out from beneath the bed sheets, turning off the vibrating finger pads by pressing them against her palm. She looks down at the milky substance covering the toys and before Harry can make even a sound of encouragement, she’s already licking it off each individual piece. The girl looks up at the vampire as she cleans every trace of him off her fingers, swallowing it all down with a doe-like tint across her hazy gaze and murmuring a soft, “You taste good.” over a full mouth. Harry just watches silently, heavy breathing slowly starting to even out. God, she really is such a fucking godsend.
The next couple of minutes list by in a blur, all of his focus taken up by the feeling of unsettlement pricking at the back of his brain. Why had he let her touch him there? Why had he let her touch him in a place no one has since before his death?
Y/N puts the toys back in their box, putting them off to the side to thoroughly clean later. She reaches down, bunching up her bedspread in her hand and wiping Harry’s pelvis, thighs, and tummy down until he’s decently clean, as well as whatever is left on her hand. She then snuggles up to his side once again, laying her head into the crook between his arm and pectoral muscles, staring up at the ceiling thoughtfully along with him. The irritating red tint across Harry’s chest, stomach, and neck gradually fades away, and he barely flinches when he feels her sponge her lips against his Adam’s Apple. She lulls the tip of her middle finger up along the vein of his cock one more time for finality, smiling slyly when he hisses in sensitivity.
The immortal tilts his head down to appraise her, sniffling lightly and allowing a weak, watery smile across his raw lips. His tone is feathery and detached. “That was…Christ.”
Y/N giggles softly, nodding along to his unspoken opinion. “It was fun. Really fun. We should do it again sometime.” 
Harry splutters into a drunken laugh, mind still floating around the room. “I don’t think I could survive that again.”
Y/N grins up at him cheekily. “Pussy.” 
Her friend breaks into an expression of utter offense, cheeks still slightly rosy. He shoves her head roughly as vengeance. “Hey! Piss off. Don’t blame it on me, blame it on the male anatomy.” 
The girl shakes her head up at him, eyebrows shrugging mockingly. “Excuses, excuses.” 
“Whatever.” 
A moment passes, and then Y/N speaks up again, her index finger poking playfully into the center of his bare chest, right over the butterfly tattoo. “Also, you’re washing my sheets. Your mess, you clean it up.”
Harry grins against her forehead, scratching lightly at the back of her scalp. “Fair enough…Wait, is that why you wanted to do this? ‘Cause you knew I’d soil your sheets and you could force me to do your laundry?”
That hadn’t been her motive at all, and Harry knows that, but she plays along anyways for the hell of the joke. “Perhaps.” 
“Wow. I feel used.” 
“Too bad. Go do it. Now. Before it stains.”
Harry stares at her like she’s sprouted a second head. “I literally can’t walk right now! I can’t feel anything below my waist.”
Y/N lifts the comforter off her body, symbolically showing off the bruises his fingertips and rings had left the night before. “Well, neither can I!” 
Harry reaches down and touches the marks, chuckling to himself. “How unfortunate. Who’s gonna make breakfast, then, if neither of us can even stand?”
“We could UberEats some iHop.” 
“Who’s gonna get the door?”
“Well, I can’t solve everything on my own, now can I?!” Y/N slaps his hand away from her body. “Contribute! You’re the lead detective, after all.” 
“I am, aren’t I?” Harry cocks his head to the side in recollection, remembering his role in their imaginary dynamic duo scenario. “And because I’m the lead, I say…” He ropes his lean arms around the human and buries his face into her warm neck, pulling her close and intertwining their legs together, trapping her to the mattress along with him. “I say we just bum around for a bit longer. Just until one of us can actually muster up the strength to leave the bed.” 
Y/N makes an exasperated noise in the back of her throat, but makes no apparent attempt to leave his embrace. “Fine.” 
“Mystery solved, then! Elementary, my dear Watson.”
“You’re so dumb.” 
The pair stay cuddled for a bit, with Y/N’s hands loosely gripping Harry’s forearms, tracing across his mermaid tattoo absently. She wanders in her thoughts for a period of time, lost in the sensation of Harry’s warm breath fanning down her neck, his hot lips pressing small kisses behind her ear every once in a while. She likes their morning after routine; it’s innocent and fun and sharing moments like this makes it easy to forget her troubles. She wants more of this, and she finds herself trying to come up with ways to convince Harry to spend the night more often. This is only the fourth time he’s stayed until morning and she wants that number to grow. 
An idea dawns on her and she’s voicing it before her inhibitions can kill it off.
“Do you...Do you maybe wanna stay over the rest of the weekend?”
Harry draws his face from the alcove of her soft neck, eyebrows poised in curiosity. “The rest of the weekend?”
“Yeah!” Y/N shifts her gaze up to look at him, hope swirling around her pupils. “Like, spend the rest of today and tomorrow over, and then leave tomorrow night ‘cause I have work on Monday. Does that, like...Does that make sense?” 
“Yeah.” Harry says slowly, mulling over her offer, thinking back to his schedule. He doesn’t think he has any commitments this weekend that would require him being home— none he can’t cancel easily, anyways. He’d told Mitch he’d go see him play again at the pub later today, but it’s the same set as last time, so he doesn’t think his best friend would mind if he missed it just this once. Niall was planning a barbecue at his place on Sunday, but the Irish bloke does one almost every other week so it’s nothing Harry can’t make up. Plus, what type of idiot would pass up two day’s worth of amazing sex? The more, the merrier.
Y/N watches the vampire’s expression carefully, trying to interpret whether her request was out of their boundaries. She doesn’t want to make him feel like she’s trying to tie him down or suffocate him, she just wants to spend a bit more time in his presence, rather than through a phone screen. Her tone comes out dismissive, with just the tiniest hint of panic. “It’s okay if you can’t, though. Like, if you have other plans and stuff, I totally get it. Or if you just don’t want to, that’s fine, too! I just thought it’d be a fun little thing we can do since we already talk so much on the phone and everything, so I guess I just kinda figured you wouldn’t mind—”
“I get it, Y/N.” Harry interrupts Y/N’s unhinged word vomit, voice amused and nonchalant. “I think I’d like that, yeah.”
Y/N blinks in giddy surprise. “Really?” 
“Well, don’t sound so shocked.” Harry laughs lightly, fingers toying with the pearls laying across his clavicle. “The sex is pretty fucking good and I’m more than happy to have it at my disposal.” 
“Right.” Y/N gives him a deadpan look, shaking her head at his bluntness, reaching forward to fiddle with the chain of his cross necklace for the sake of having something to distract her from smiling like a fool. “Great, then. I have some old boxers that I know will probably fit you and an unopened pack of toothbrushes under the sink, so I think you’re set.” 
Harry’s lips purse at the mention of the men’s underwear, brows creasing a tad. “You just casually have men’s boxers laying around?” 
“They were my ex’s and I kept them out of spite. But don’t tell anyone, I don’t wanna get locked up for robbery.” 
The tightness in his chest— which he hadn’t even realized had formed— melts away. “My lips are sealed.”
“Good, or else I’d have to kill you.” The girl states darkly, a theatrical seriousness to her appearance. 
“Oh no.” Harry wails sarcastically, knotting a fist into her oversized tee and pulling her closer, connecting their lips and grinning into the kiss. “I’m shaking in fear.” 
Y/N gives in without much of a fight, hands still clinging to his forearms, a smile of her own creeping across her cheeks. “Asshole.”
“The only thing I’m relatively afraid of is my dick falling off. You have the sexual drive of a rabbit.” 
“Oh, like you’re any better?” 
“I’m innocent in all this! You’re usually the one instigating. I’m just a mere pawn— a poor, unsuspecting nun led astray.”
“God, I can’t believe I let you fuck me.” 
///
The following weekend, Harry officially invites Y/N over to his house. 
It had been talked about in passing a while back, and he figures it's only fair considering all the time they’ve ever spent together has been solely at her place. Plus, he could tell she was curious to see what his living situation is like, which is valid. You can tell a lot about people through their home, and when you’re sleeping with someone on the regular, you want to learn as much about them as possible. It’s important to know who you’re getting into bed with. Literally. 
Harry’s proud of his condo. He keeps it clean, he keeps it organized, and he keeps it styled in a manner that combines his Victorian gothic roots with modern day aesthetics. The floorboards of the apartment are made of waxed light-wash wood, most of the expanse of his living room covered in a furry dark grey rug. The lightness of the ground is contrasted by the matte mahogany walls, of which the largest is covered in Harry’s collection of first edition artwork. He had picked out every single piece himself throughout the span of the last two centuries, ranging from modern digital technique canvases to nineteenth century oil paintings, all arranged in neat alternating rows from oldest to newest. He can’t help that he’s such a stickler; his mom had raised him so. 
Though his art wall is his pride and joy, the glass wall that overlooks the city skyline comes in at a close second. Harry loves the city, despite the fact that he was born in a seemingly irrelevant town whose only redeeming quality was the bustling public market. Urban regions are just full of so much life, excitement, and potential, which are all concepts he never really got to explore before he transitioned. Cities represent everything he wanted as a young man, when he thought he had prosperous years ahead of him and an entire life left to build; they represent diversity, unique experiences, and endless possibilities. When that was stripped from him, he began to bounce around different countries and cities all over the world, seeking a place that would fill the hole his dreams had left behind. Los Angeles fit that space like a puzzle piece. 
That glorified window just means more to him than anyone could possibly know. Sometimes at night, he’ll just stand by it with his arms relaxed across his chest, watching the city gleam and glitter as individuals from all different backgrounds go about their business, blissfully ignorant to the beautiful concept that they all contribute to something much bigger— a concept that only centuries of wisdom could reveal. When he’s not wracked with jealousy and spite, looking out that window and witnessing the world change and evolve is therapeutic, in a way. It allows Harry to live vicariously through others who get to have what he never did. 
Aside from his art collection and the glass wall, the chandeliers that hang from his cavernous ceiling are third on his list of treasured possessions. They’re special and no one on this earth owns anything like them; Harry made sure of that. They were created by a Swedish interior designer Harry commissioned about ten years ago, so they are custom-made in every aspect of the term. They took months to construct and finalize, which is hardly difficult to believe, given their grandeur. Each chandelier is made of two extensive layers of delicate golden chains, all arranged around a wire center, connected by light bulbs at each peak. It gives his home a chic, avant-garde atmosphere that mirrors his personality down to the last chain link. 
The rest of his flat is tailored to compliment these three major determining factors. The wood paneling all around his apartment is carved with intricate, loopy designs, his two rounded coffee tables are made of the same marble that resides across his kitchen counters, and his kitchen sits directly under the second story ledge with elongated fluorescent poles embedded into the room’s ceiling, eloquently highlighting the creme walls and polished detailings of all his appliances. His sectional couches are made of an off-brown leather, covered in large rectangular couch cushions with a checkered print embroidered across the pillow cases, and weighted fleece blankets litter some areas of the elegant sofas. A wide staircase leads up to the second floor, made of grey glass steps and metal railings. 
The top story of his condo is less Victorian era, more modern composition. The ground is dark maroon carpeting, and the ledge leads to one singular corridor that splits into two seperate rooms at either ends. One is the master bedroom, and the other is an accompanying bedroom which he uses for storage. His room isn’t anything extravagant, per se. It’s big, but his decor is minimalistic, covered in all different muted shades of blacks and greys, from the comforter on his king-sized bed to the tall dresser. A fifty inch flat-screen is mounted on the wall, but he hardly uses it since the one in his living room is larger; it’s only really there as an ornament. Starburst lights hang from his ceiling— smaller, downplayed versions of his chandeliers— and his walk-in closet stands parallel to the entrance of his bathroom. 
The humongous bathroom was meant for two people, pretty obvious in the double-sink set up, but he doesn’t dwell on it much. He isn’t one for dating, and he’s just happy to have that luxury because it comes in handy the morning after one night stands. He has a jacuzzi-like bathtub, lined with water jets and all, and a big walk-in shower with a large overhead panel instead of a regular showerhead. The whole room is made of dark marble and porcelain, and he couldn’t possibly adore it more. Some of his best experiences had happened in this room, explicit and otherwise. 
In the end, Harry has every right to be arrogantly proud of his apartment. It had taken him months to decorate, years to fill with fond memories, and an immortal lifetime to find. He loves it with every trace of his soul, even when others disagree. Namely, Niall, who had mocked his sophisticated relics and old-timey architecture from the first time he’d set foot past the threshold; “You went the dark gothic route? Really? Way to feed into the stereotype, Dracula.” 
But no matter what anyone says, this is who he is, and he couldn’t be happier. After decades of migrating and aimlessly searching the globe, he’d finally found a place he could call home, and absolutely no one could take that from him. Especially not some Irish moron who doesn’t even know the definition of “foyer.”
How Harry manages to afford his flat is a whole other intriguing tale.
It had come up in a pillow talk conversation with Y/N once, and he had told her the story he feeds to any human who asks. He’s a regional manager for an offshore company and it’s mainly a lot of online work. Handling duties through business emails, videochat meetings, job portals, and things of the such. It paints a valid image as to why he’s home all the time. He also claims to be the company’s lone contact stationed in California, so he handles all of the responsibilities that would normally be bestowed upon three or four people. This paints a valid explanation as to how his imaginary position would tether such a high pay grade, which justifies his luxurious living arrangement.
That story is part of the truth. Harry does indeed have ties with corporate businesses. That is, ties to their CEOs’ pockets. It’s surprisingly easy to get past secretaries and security dressed in a nice suit and thousand dollar leather shoes, especially with the help of compulsion and Harry’s golden charisma. Thanks to those tools, he has managed to convince some of the biggest leaders in corporate California to quietly deposit generous sums of money into his bank account once a month. And with his persuasive supernatural abilities, he convinces them to write it off as regularly scheduled charity donations in their minds. That’s how he makes a living for himself— by scamming the rich. Xander likes to take the piss and call him a sugar baby, but Harry sees himself as more of a modern day Robin Hood, instead. 
Mitch says his charade is unlawful, but considering how corrupt the business world already is, the vampire feels next to no guilt. The one percent have always taken advantage of those poorer than them— that was obvious even back in Harry’s time— and he doesn’t see anything wrong with taking advantage of them right back, now that he has the means to. How’s that saying go? “Fuck the bourgeoisie” and all that. 
Everything taken into consideration, Harry’s pretty excited to show Y/N his condo. Watching people’s faces break into awe the second he turns the lights on always gives him such a deep surge of satisfaction. It makes all the hassle worth it.  
The immortal is currently sitting in his vintage car, flicking through his Spotify playlist to find something to entertain him while he waits for Y/N to finish her shift. He had offered to pick her up, knowing that it’s what any courteous host would do, and she had appreciatively accepted, telling him she’d be out by eight P.M. It’s seven fifty-three now and Harry had arrived around seven fifty, taking the slot right in front of the cafe’s entrance so she can spot him as soon as she walks out. These ten minutes are the longest he’s ever had to endure, which says a lot considering he’s endured tons of patience-testing moments in his two hundred years.
Harry swipes his thumb down the glass screen of his phone, sampling songs left and right to see what will stick. After listening to the first few chords of an array of forties dance music, seventies rock and roll, and twenty-first century bubblegum pop, he settles for Rodeo by Lil Nas X. Harry has a very intricate taste in music— it’s one of the traits he’s most proud of— and Mitch often tells him he’s too snotty when it comes to his preferences. He’ll admit it freely that, yes, he can be a piece of work musically, but just because he thinks the industry peaked in the seventies doesn’t mean he hates modern music. He likes most of it, including rap, and Lil Nas X happens to be one of his favorites, much to everyone’s surprise. Most of the artist’s songs are eccentric not only lyrically but also instrumentally, to the point where it’s almost comical— who names a song Panini, of all things?— but the music is catchy and Harry can let loose to it easily. 
The vampire also happened to meet the musician, on one occasion. He ran into him at a club and after a few drinks and some banter, somehow ended up getting invited over to a party at the celebrity’s Malibu mansion. That night is a blur, definitely due to the copious amounts of alcohol and psychedelics, but Harry remembers they had fun and that the guy was worth a listen. In fact, he was the genius that came up with the theme for the rapper’s Rodeo music video. 
A light knocking on the passenger’s seat window brings him out of his memories. Y/N stands outside, hugging her arms loosely over her tummy, decked in her usual work uniform of a navy polo and black skinny jeans. When the two lock eye contact, she gives him a soft wave and a tired smile. Harry lifts two fingers in greeting, returning her polite gesture and swiftly lowering the window. He leans forward across the center console, his grin taking on a playful hue, voice carrying the same effect. 
“Uber for Y/N?” 
The girl snorts and rolls her eyes, but plays along, reaching forward and jiggling the handle of his black Cadillac symbolically. “That’s me, yes. Open up.” 
“Eh, eh, eh.” Harry tuts, wagging a finger in her direction and then making a motion that tells her to back away. “I’m gonna have to see some ID. It’s one of our new safe driver policies. Gotta make sure you are who you say you are, miss.” 
Y/N’s expression drops flatly, eyes half-lidded as he smiles up at her brightly, batting his eyelashes innocently. “Open the door before you end up sucking your own dick tonight.” 
Harry’s shit-eating face falls so fast, it causes her to burst into laughter. A soft click vibrates through the handle below her fingers. “I’ll waive the background check. Just this once.”  
“Yeah, I figured as much.” Y/N taunts, yanking the door open and ducking into the shotgun seat, gently tugging it closed behind her. 
Once the human is situated in her spot, she releases a lengthy sigh, sinking down against the cushions as she grabs her seat belt and clicks it into place. 
Harry puts his cell phone down into the cubby hole below the stereo set, setting the car in reverse and slinging an arm behind her headrest to get a better view as he backs out of the parking space. His gaze momentarily flickers to her slumped form as the car retreats slowly, tone curious. “Long day?”
Y/N glimpses over, giving him a quick once-over and taking in his olive green Nike jumper, ripped denim boyfriend jeans, and pastel yellow Vans. He looks so boyishly cute, which is ironic given the premise of tonight’s rendezvous. The shoes (which he had worn the night they’d met all those weeks ago) and the position he’s in (perched above her with his sharp jaw and neck flexing as he cranes his torso to look for oncoming traffic) flashes her back to the first time she had been in his car. They had been way less acquainted, she had been much less relaxed, much more nervous, but the encounter very much carried the same exact intentions. That recollection makes her lips quirk a bit. The pair had grown so comfortable with each other since then, that Friday evening feels like it happened decades ago. 
“Yeah.” Y/N murmurs softly, gladly indulging a deep inhale of the vanilla and tobacco scent she had become familiar with, allowing it to soothe her nerves and wash away the stress of a hard day. “I’m just happy it’s over and that the weekend’s finally started. Wanna forget all about it.” 
“Well, that’s what I’m here for, love!” Harry plops back into his seat, shifting his car into drive and gifting her his famous brilliant smile, dimples winking to life as he taps his ringed fingers across his steering wheel humorously. “I’ve made you forget your name plenty of times before; I’m pretty sure I can erase one shitty work shift just fine.”
Y/N scoffs at his pompous claim, reaching up and prying the hair tie out of her locks, looping it over her wrist and shushing her stiff roots. She tucks strands behind her ears, the corners of her mouth twitching in endearment at the giddiness of his aura. “Just drive, Sherlock.” 
The mortal isn’t surprised to find that building in which the vampire lives is one of the tallest in the city, and that it’s basically smack in the center, as well. One look at Harry and anybody could immediately tell he thrives off being the center of attention, so of course his home is a direct reflection of that. Refined boy, refined personality, refined environment. It’s practically a law of science. 
Once Harry’s car is parked and the ignition rumbles to a smooth stop, Y/N unbuckles her seat belt and goes to unlock the passenger’s side door. Right as her hand is wrapping around the handle bar, the door swings open of its own accord and she just barely manages to stifle a blood-curdling scream full of shocked fear. When her eyes focus, Harry is standing there holding the door open for her, features painted with cocky amusement. 
“How did you—?” The girl whips around to look at the empty driver’s seat, eyebrows cinching in bewilderment as she turns back to face him. “How did you get around so fast?” 
Harry shrugs his shoulders offhandedly, reaching one bejeweled hand down to aid her out of the vehicle. “I did track when I was younger. Made me a fast walker.” 
Y/N hesitantly takes it, body language still slightly tense from the jump scare. With his help, she gradually climbs out, the door shutting behind her as she sweeps her sight around the parking garage in wonder. This is the first time Harry has ever invited her anywhere, let alone to where he spends most of his life. She doesn’t want to miss a thing. Even the simplest aspect can tell you a lot about a person. 
Y/N jerks a tad when she feels her friend’s cold fingers slipping down her palm, sifting between her own. She glances down at their intertwined hands for a second, a warm glow bursting through her chest. She’s always admired how his are so much bigger. 
Harry tugs her forward toward the elevator at the other end of the parking lot, bottom lip caught between his teeth in a sly smirk. “C’mon, Watson. Let me show you around.” 
Y/N stumbles after him, allowing the boy to guide her to where she needs to go as he weeds through cars effortlessly. She suddenly chimes up from behind, asking a random question to fill the leftover silence their footsteps spare. “That car next to yours had such a weird license plate. What the fuck does ‘craic’ mean?” 
Harry chuckles knowingly, perfectly aware of whose car she is referring to. “It’s this odd thing Irish people say. Utter rubbish, honestly.” 
A comfortable quietness fills the air of the elegant elevator as it shoots up towards the twenty-fourth floor of the skyscraper, the only other sound being the gentle lullaby of a nameless tune wafting through the speakers above their heads. Harry finds himself studying Y/N as she looks out at the city through the glass walls, the lights of the exterior buildings casting a beautiful buttery gleam across her relaxed characteristics, along with a radiant glint over the surface of her glossy eyes. Despite the slightly smeared mascara staining her waterline and the inherent frizziness her hair carries after being pulled into a tight ponytail all day, Harry finds that she looks nice. Pretty, even. 
The girl senses him staring, craning her head to return his gaze, the edges of her lips lilting upwards lightheartedly. He returns the gesture, peeling away to focus on something— anything— else. He deems the control panel a worthy replacement.
As the numbers on the dial drag by, Harry finds himself absentmindedly thumbing over Y/N’s knuckles. She doesn’t seem to notice or mind, so he continues doing it, massaging the crest of each bump and pressing down gently along the troughs. He enjoys the sensation of her silky warm skin heating his icy own, and he ponders whether she likes how cold his touch is, or if she hates it as much as he does. He expels that notion from his mind; he refuses to let such a stupid concept upset him. He just keeps caressing her hand, restraining his mind from ambling too far into its meaning. It’s just to pass the time. 
He keeps the movements going until their ride skates to a joltless halt with a sharp ding! and then he steps out, having to give his full attention to leading her down the long corridor to his flat. Y/N is so caught up in drinking up her surroundings, she almost bumps into the creature when he comes to an abrupt stop in front of the entrance of what she can only deduce is his home. Harry drops her hand, much to her disappointment, fishing into his back pocket for his keys. He patiently filters through his keychain, picking out the right one and working it into the lock, a soft click emitting from the mechanism. 
Harry pushes the door open with his palm, standing off to the side just outside the threshold and tilting his head towards it, posture bowing slightly. “Ladies first.” 
Y/N thanks him quietly, taking a cautious step forward into his hallway. She can’t help the way her heart skips a beat at his gentlemanly tendencies; she rarely meets anyone as respectful as Harry seems to be and she finds his old-timey attributes to be refreshing. Helping her out the car, taking her hand to guide her through the parking lot, rubbing at her knuckles innocently, holding the door open for her— it’s all such an archaic form of chivalry she wishes she’d see more often these days. She doesn’t know if it’s a British thing, if he had just been raised like that, or if he simply does it to get laid, but she’s thankful for it either way. 
With one last glance at her friend over her shoulder, she begins wandering down the dark narrow path unsurely. The sound of the door slinking shut behind her and Harry’s footsteps ease her. 
She stops once she senses the corridor open up into a larger space, which she guesses is his living room. A soft gasp escapes her at the sight before her. The whole area is washed in darkness, the only source of light stemming from the large glass pane that stretches from the floor of the apartment to its tall ceiling. Dozens of buildings and cars glimmer below, the breath-taking image of the lively city looking almost like a snapshot from a professional movie. It’s absolutely gorgeous and she feels like she could stare at it for eons. 
A chilly hand suddenly presses along the dip of her spine, ushering her forward an inch or two, Harry’s invisible voice and warm breath hitting the shell of her left ear. “S’cuse me, dove.”   
The boy reaches behind her for the light switch and the condo bursts into radiance with one simple flick of his wrist. 
“Oh...my God.”
Harry’s home is something straight out of a luxury catalogue. The light floorboards and the mahogany panels. The massive leather couches and hand-sewn cushions. The extravagant chandeliers and glass staircase. The marble kitchen and generously packed liquor shelves. The ginormous wall of priceless artwork, littered with pieces from all different eras of history. It feels like stepping into a decor wonderland.
“Not too bad, huh?” Harry pipes up playfully, anchoring her back into reality from the floaty stupor that had consumed her mind. 
“Not too—? Are you kidding?” Y/N sputters incredulously, whizzing her head to the side sharply. “You were keeping an entire Four Seasons royal suite from me?!”
Harry belts out a bundle of childish giggles, the edges of his eyes crinkling and the tip of his button nose twitching. “I never thought of it much, to be honest. I’d grown to like your place.” 
“Right. Because a creaky mattress and a kitchen the size of a broom closet is so much more satisfying than chandeliers and a fucking glass wall.”
The vampire glimpses around his flat indicatively. “Okay, I see your point.”
“Exactly.” 
Y/N drifts forward, running the tips of her fingers across the backrest of the aged leather sofa and along the corners of the throw pillow, doing a slow circle at the middle of his home, taking everything in a second time around to make sure it isn’t a mirage. “Fuck, this is incredible. Is your boss looking for any more regional managers, by any chance?”
Harry follows after her, tucking his hands into the back pockets of his boyfriend jeans, chewing along the inside of his cheek to suppress a proud smile— a result of her explosive reaction. “I’m afraid my position is the one and only, sorry.”
Y/N droops her shoulders in exaggerated contempt, presenting a shitty English accent to tease him. “Bollocks.”
It garners the designated feedback, her tummy somersaulting at Harry’s exorbitant laughter. 
The boy comes to stand before her, cocking his head to the side questioningly towards his kitchen. “Can I offer you a drink?”
Y/N glimpses over at his bar area, eyes dancing over his extensive array of fancy bottles. “Oh, please do.”
Despite only having known Y/N for a few weeks, Harry has gotten quite acquainted with her tastes, even outside of sexual matters. She doesn't like the taste of alcohol, but she likes its effects. And he likes them, too, if he’s being honest. Her blood always begins to smell more appetizing after just a few sips and the way her cheeks heat up so easily when she’s buzzed always makes his breathing trip. 
He works his extensive skills, pulling from his liquor cabinet and mixing flavored liquids and syrups until he comes up with something that he thinks the girl will enjoy. It’s fruity, with hints of peach, lime, and strawberry, but also warm and fulfilling, with a rich whiskey and a few dashes of bitters. He plunks in a couple of ice cubes and mixes it together with a bar spoon, tapping it against the rim with finality and swiping it over his tongue in a quick taste test. He’s pretty happy with his concoction. 
Harry glances up to where Y/N is leaning against the armrest of his couch, her legs crossed before her as she stares at one of the abstract paintings mounted on his wall. It’s an original, as are the rest of them, which he had purchased some odd seventy years ago from a barely known artist whose talent had gone to waste in the world. It’s a deconstructed sunflower, with the color palette inverted and the strokes of the brush uneven and jagged. Odd and complicated, but beautiful, nonetheless. Its complexity is what makes it significant. 
The vampire slowly wanders over from his kitchen, holding her drink in one hand and a cloth napkin in the other. He takes the spot beside her along the armrest, speaking wistfully as if recalling a fond memory. “It’s a flower.”
Y/N nods slowly in recognition, peeling her gaze away with the corners of her lips jilting. “Mmhm, a sunflower.”
Harry’s brows jump in shock. Barely anyone ever guesses the identity correctly. He’s found that as time passes and humanity becomes more reliant on technology rather than cognizant knowledge, society in general has reduced to a more pea-brained state than ever. As a result, the amount of people who can interpret and understand the meaning behind complex artwork has greatly diminished, unfortunately, so he’s pleasantly surprised to find that one of the few who still possesses that talent happens to be the girl he’s shagging. “Wow, that’s a first. It’s so unusual, no one ever really gets it.”
“I guess I just have an affinity for the unusual.” His guest quips, giving him a jesting shrug of her eyebrows and a suggestive grin. 
You have no idea.
“You underestimated me, Holmes.” 
“That I did. My sincerest apologies.” Harry returns her joking simper, proceeding to then dip an index finger inside the stout glass in his grasp, bringing it up before her face. “Taste.”
Without breaking eye contact, Y/N parts her lips and allows him to coax the wet digit in, the tangy flavor of the mixture making her taste buds tingle. She encloses her mouth around his finger, lulling her tongue along it slowly with a mischievous glint shining across her irises. 
Harry’s prominent jaw clenches as he watches the scene unfold, breath bated and a moan threatening to betray him. She truly wastes no time.
He gradually pulls his finger from her tongue, struggling to clear his throat, missing its texture already. “How is it? More syrup? More biters?”
Y/N gazes up at him drunkenly, though it’s definitely not from the liquor. Her lips quirk cheekily as a result of how visibly frazzled she’d gotten him. “It’s perfect. Better than anything I’ve had at a club, that’s for sure.” 
“Yeah?” Harry taps his opal ring against the bottom of the lowball glass, trying to reign in his previous composure. “Think I could be a bartender?” 
“You don’t hit me as the type of person who has the patience for it.” The girl remarks wittily, slinking her head to the side and biting back a giggle when Harry makes a face at her.
“You make a valid point, I suppose.” The vampire responds with an airy sigh, nodding in surrender. “The stupid blabbing from drunk morons and impending fear of being vomited on would be too much for me. I wouldn’t last a day.” 
“You wouldn’t last a single night, let alone a whole day.”
“Alright, pipe down!” Harry deadpans, bumping her shoulder with his vengefully. “You’re bruising my ego.”
“It’s humongous,” Y/N snorts, shoving him in return, “it can take a few hits.”
The pair sit there in silence for a suspended moment, just taking in the expanse of the art before them. Harry then turns his torso towards her once more, bringing the drink in his grip up to her mouth. “Here, have a proper sip. Put my all into it.” 
Y/N obliges, looking up at him with her signature doe-like air of trusting innocence, allowing him to tip the hem of the cup against her mouth. The cool beverage filters through her taste buds and down her throat, the sweet and sour mixture leaving an enjoyable tingle in its wake. A few streams of the liquid bead out of the corners of her lips and Harry impulsively gathers them with the side of his index finger, the napkin in his other hand completely forgotten. 
As he goes to pull back in order to clean up, Y/N leans forward and traps his digit between her lips like before. This time, there’s a more insistent sultry hint sparkling around her pupils. 
“Christ...” Harry pants, watching Y/N work her way down his forefinger with a silent groan hinging on his teeth. 
He doesn’t deny himself from indulging the dirty action this time around. Her mouth is as soft and warm as ever, sending chills racing down his spine despite the sweater hugging his body. His mind slips for a second, reminiscing in all the other ways he’s felt the inside of her mouth before, a faint red tinge splattering across his cheekbones. 
Y/N draws his finger out, kissing messily across its length and over the pad, looking up at him through tension-heavied lashes. She doesn't speak a word, but her intentions are clear in the electricity between them.
He can’t hold back any longer, his next comment coming out as a pained growl. “God, you’re such a filthy little thing.”  
She hums softly in the back of her throat at his explicit compliment, suckling at the center of her bottom lip needily. “I like being your filthy little thing.”
Harry swallows thickly in order to keep himself somewhat tame, fangs suddenly pricking his tongue in warning.
The mortal scoots closer to him, sifting her fingers between his around the drink and bringing it upwards, downing the last couple of inches in one go. She draws the cup from his grasp, reaching over to set it down carefully on the coffee table before turning back and snuggling deeper into his heaving chest. 
Harry scoffs in amusement, but he can feel a certain charring scratching at the back of his throat. “Drinks like that are meant to be savored, darling. You’re not supposed to just pound them.” 
Y/N stretches her neck upwards, taking his earlobe between her teeth, lips wet and cold from the alcohol. His lashes flutter when her warm breath hits his skin, contradicting the sensations from before. 
“Why don’t you let me worry about how I drink, and you can worry about a different kind of pounding.”
And that’s all it takes, really. That’s all it takes for Harry to completely drop any self-control he has left. 
The creature jars his face towards her, large hand shooting upwards to grip her jaw firmly, holding her in place as he crashes their mouths together. It’s all tongue and clacking teeth, desperate whines and stuttered gasps. Y/N’s hands fumble for something to tether to while Harry takes it upon himself to grasp at her opposite hip with his free hand, yanking her onto his lap. She buries her fists in the cotton fabric of his jumper, balancing her knees on either sides of his parted thighs. The boy’s fingers coast from her jaw down to her throat, tightening ever so slightly. The action is minimal, but it reveals that flare of dominance Y/N has become addicted to. 
“Do you want it here?” Harry rasps against her eager tongue, smirking into the kiss when he feels her start to rock along the bulge that is beginning to tent his denim pants. “Do you want me to bend you over the couch and fuck you, baby? With the chandelier making your skin glow? Where we can put on a show for the whole city to see?”
It’s a tempting offer and his words obviously have some form of impact, seen in the way Y/N’s grinding takes on a hungrier, deeper pace against his clothed cock. 
“I want…” Y/N finds it difficult to voice her desires, the responsible party being the manner in which Harry glues cracked mewls onto the roof of her mouth. “I want it in your bed.” 
She doesn’t know why, but she just wants him to take her some place where the moment they share is intimate, unseen by the prying eyes of others. She wants to christen his bed exactly how he had done hers; she craves that strange connection, for some reason. Y/N isn’t naive, she knows she’s not the only person Harry has had in his home and in his sheets. But she wants that experience, nonetheless, even if it doesn’t necessarily mean anything. She knows she’s not his only, but at least she’s one. 
Harry slowly breaks their kiss, brushing the tip of his nose across her own in a small comforting gesture. He blinks at her groggily, the copper specks in his eyes glitzing under the golden hue of the lighting. When he speaks, its soft and low, almost as if he doesn’t want to risk another soul overhearing. “Okay. Whatever you want, it’s yours.” 
Y/N almost doesn’t get anything she wants, given that she nearly kills herself on the trek up the stairs, courtesy of her weakened knees and wobbly ankles. Harry just barely manages to save her, but he finds the occurrence too hilarious to spare her the embarrassment. 
“Stop laughing, it’s not funny!” She exclaims indignantly as he helps her up the last few glass steps, clinging to him like a scared puppy, her hands still shaking with adrenaline. “I could have died!” 
Her shrieking only makes him laugh harder and he nearly keels over, palm clutching his stomach as if to keep it from popping. “I’m sorry, I really am, but it’s just— your face when you— and how you tripped sideways— I—”
Y/N shoves him hard towards the corridor where his bedroom lies, but it’s hard to maintain an angry demeanor when the young man’s giggles sound like bells and when he looks so cute with his curls flopping across his forehead. “Dickhead.” 
They’re almost at his bedroom door when Harry grabs onto her wrist, tugging her roughly so that she lurches forward into his chest. He plants a wet kiss onto the bridge of her nose, expression entertained. “Stop being such a bad sport. It was pretty funny.”
“Yeah, okay.” She huffs begrudgingly, glancing down impatiently at his plump lips as he walks backwards down the hallway with her in tow. “You can invalidate my rage once you have a near death experience yourself.”
The irony of it all. 
Harry kicks the door open, ghosting his mouth over Y/N’s and watching her sight do a quick sweep around the area. “Welcome to my lair.” 
The human likes his aesthetic. The room has different hues of the same color, so it all ties together nicely, and the hanging lights look like miniature versions of the two large ones downstairs. The bed is huge, which is a relief because for once, they won’t have to actively worry about accidentally rolling off the edge mid-fuck. “It’s nice. Very chic.” 
“Thanks.” Harry reaches up and cups either side of her neck with his palms, dragging his damp lips over her chin and down the center of her jugular, smiling against her skin when he feels her shiver. “It doesn't have a bookshelf wall like yours, but I make due.”
“Yeah.” Y/N wisps out weakly, leaning her head back as he speckles his mouth across that sensitive point on her throat he discovered ages ago. “I bet.”
She feels Harry’s touch travel down her torso, cold fingers suddenly smearing across her love handles beneath her work shirt. His grip tightens at the hem with the intention of pulling the polo off, breath hot as it washes over her collarbones. “Wanna find out just how good I make it work?”
Y/N’s arms instinctively raise on command, her reply shaky and fragile. “Yes, please.” 
Harry makes it work. He makes it work so fucking well. He doesn’t need crazy positions or any vibrating toys to make her feel good; he just knows her so thoroughly by now that he’s able to tend to every single one of her needs like it’s his sole purpose. The sex is missionary, with her splayed out across her back upon his mound of feathered pillows, her thighs clamped over his hips as he slams into her at a harsh, curt pace. Her calves are tied around the backs of his thighs, her nails are carving memories into the broad expanse of his shoulders, they’re both panting curse words and encouragement into each other’s mouths, and he’s cradling her to his chest as if he wants to absorb her heartbeat right through her ribs. If only obtaining one were that easy. 
Y/N allows her head to fall back against the cushions, drawing away from the prolonged kiss only because she needs air to continue. Harry’s lips busy themselves elsewhere, running down the valley of her chest and toying with one of her pebbled nipples. Y/N’s back gives a sharp arch the second he brushes across the sensitive nub and the taunting coo he releases goes straight to her core. 
“Liked that, darling? Like it when I kiss you there?”
The girl’s lashes have fallen shut, her eyes lulling around in their sockets as he maintains a steady rhythm between her thighs, ramming into her with so much force, the headboard is knocking into the wall. It’s loud and intense enough that Harry has to fit one of his palms between the railings, bracing the weight of the bed in order to prevent a hole from forming. 
Y/N’s voice fills the dense atmosphere, so shattered and raw, she can hardly understand herself. “It feels so— so good, H.” 
“I love it when you call me that. Sounds so pretty coming from your lips.” The vampire’s tongue flicks over her nipple a handful of times, dark veins momentarily webbing over the whites of his eyes at the cracked whimper she lets loose. “And of course it feels good. I always make you feel good, don’t I? Always make my girl cum so—fucking—hard.” 
Y/N’s trembling fingers card into the curls along the nape of Harry’s neck as he thrusts to his words, twisting them around her knuckles and swimming in the throaty groan he pours over the clammy skin of her breasts. Her whisper sounds distant and dreamy. “Please...Please don’t stop.”
Harry gazes up at her through heavy lashes, lapping at her chest more fervently, accent thick and deep. “I won’t, baby. Not until I have you dripping all over my sheets.”
After a few more minutes of fractured moans bouncing around the panels of the room and the noise of wet skin slapping together, something catches Y/N’s bleary eyes. She wills past the blissful fog in her mind, focusing on the intriguing object hanging from one of the railings of Harry’s bedpost, swaying back and forth wildly due to his strong tempo. 
“Are those...Are those handcuffs?” 
Harry’s attention jumps to where hers is pinned, his powerful stride coming to a gradual stop. He’s heaving and shuddering above her, ringlets matted to his jaw and across his temples, cheeks flushed the prettiest shade of cherry red. His Adam’s Apple bobs once and he gives a short nod. “Y-Yeah. I’ve had them for a while...”
The hope dripping from his voice is practically palpable and Y/N interprets it easily. She glances down at him as he takes quivering inhales against her chest, his eyes bleeding lust. Her mumble is so quiet and soft, he wonders how it’s possible for her to make some of the preposterously loud sounds he’s used to hearing whenever he’s buried this deep. “Use them on me. Please?”
Harry bends to her request without hesitation. He locks her wrists into the restraints, sponging a kiss onto each before giving them one hard tug to check for security. He then regains his rough slams, but with more fervor than before. 
The monster sits back onto his heels, groping her waist roughly and working her against his thighs, watching welts form on her flesh along the pads of his fingers. Y/N unconsciously begins circling her hips to match his speed and the fractured groan that rips out of him makes her walls tighten. He looks incredible looming in front of her, head toppled back between his shoulder blades, bouncing to his every ram. His throat flexes with the weight, jaw taut and inked pectorals glistening with sweat under the dim lights dangling from his ceiling. “That’s it, pet, just like that. Love the way you ride it. You’re so fucking tight and warm and...and just— Christ, just fuck me.”
She wishes she could frame this moment in time and drag it out forever.  
Harry swings his head forward again, blinking the blurriness from his vision to take in the image before him. Y/N just looks so fucking gorgeous like that, tied down at his beck and call, her chest bouncing pertly as her fingers bunch around the chain link, thighs clinging to his waist as she chews her bottom lip raw in an attempt to control her noises. 
The vampire ducks down, connecting their mouths in a sloppy kiss that cajoles her into spilling all the moans she had been withholding. He feels them trickle down his lungs and diffuse into his bones, flames lapping across his insides as their foreheads bump and noses smudge, ragged breaths intermingling. “Let it out for me, hm? Wanna know how I’m making you feel, don’t care who hears.”
As if that isn’t enough, there’s an instance where Harry’s animalistic senses suddenly enhance and he comes to the realization that the metal cuffs have made a tiny laceration along her skin. 
A thin trail of blood travels down her suspended arm, but she doesn’t seem to notice, too lost in the pleasure Harry is pounding into the pit of her stomach. So he simply leans upwards and licks the sweet droplet clean, feeling heat spark across every fiber of his being. He laps up the entire stream and then presses a tender kiss to her palm for good measure, grunting out a gentle, “There’s a good girl.” when she whines at the affectionate gesture. 
The release Harry is getting from between Y/N’s legs mixes with the ecstasy her blood brings, and it shoves him over the edge in a manner he hasn’t experienced since that first time they slept together all those weeks ago. Since the first time he tasted what lies in her veins, while also simultaneously getting to taste the indescribable relief her body so readily brings him.
After all is said and done that night, something peculiar happens. After they both milk their orgasms for everything it’s worth, and after Y/N gives into exhaustion in his arms with her wrists bruised and a content watery smile on her face, and after he gets a heftier drink from her neck and heals the two little puncture wounds with his own blood...The most bizarre, unexpected event occurs. 
Harry falls asleep soundly for the first time in months, and all he dreams about is how Y/N tasted. 
///
Y/N wakes up the next morning to her body covered in Harry’s Nike jumper, to an empty spot beside her in the messy duvet, to a familiar tune tinging her ears from a distance, and to a satisfying ache between her thighs. 
As soon as she cracks the bedroom door open, the smell of pancakes wafts in through the chilled morning air. Specifically, lemon and blueberry pancakes. Her grandmother’s lemon and blueberry pancakes.
A shiver runs down Y/N’s spine the second she sets a toe along the cold glass panels of Harry’s staircase. She takes a deep breath, pulling the extra length of the sweater’s sleeves over her fists and tugging the hem of the article downwards as if she could convince it to cover more than just half her thighs. She carefully works her way down the steps, flinching at the iciness that travels up her legs with every motion. When she finally thunks down emptily onto the light-wash floorboards, her body has grown accustomed to the temperature. As she pads across the furry rug in Harry’s living room, she finds herself wondering why everything connected to him is always so unusually cold— colder than any normal person could withstand. His touch, his lips, the tip of his nose, his forehead, his chest, even his thighs; everything is always freezing, and she doesn’t understand how he can bear it. It’s such an odd affinity to have. 
The human gradually wanders into the vampire’s kitchen, peeking inside the room from behind one of the archway’s walls. What she sees throws her for a loop. 
Harry is cooking breakfast, as she expected from the sweet scent she’d awoken to, but he’s doing it in a manner she never really expected from him. 
Music stems from a portable speaker he has situated at the center of the marble kitchen island, blaring loud enough to fill the entire giant home with high notes, guitar chords, and acapella riffs. The young man is dancing across his kitchen as he cooks, clad in nothing but a set of black Calvin Klein briefs and a pair of fuzzy magenta socks. Y/N rakes down his body, admiring the crimson and purple love bites she had left on his chest and the raspberry red scratches zig-zagging across his back, the marks flexing with the movements of his muscles. They’re strangely faint, for some reason. Practically barely there. 
She chalks it up to the fact that maybe she hadn’t bruised him as much as she’d thought. 
Y/N forces herself to keep her mind from straying onto anymore explicit topics; it’s probably not even ten A.M. yet. She needs to get herself under control.
Grooving while in the kitchen isn’t necessarily weird (she’s guilty of it herself), but Harry’s dancing techniques very much are. The only accurate depiction of it is that for a boy in his twenties, he dances like an old geezer in his eighties. His moves are choppy and old-schooled, almost like what you’d expect to see in a nineteen fifties disco hall, and watching him ebb and flow across the tiled ground to choreography similar to that of Dirty Dancing and Footloose... It would send anybody into a fit of laughter. Especially since Harry is so tall and lanky, so how he manages to move in such a way is beyond her understanding. 
Aside from that, his choice of music is baffling, as well. Not only because she recognizes the soundtrack, but because she would have never expected someone like him— with his cocky behavior and overly-confident caliber— to be into these types of songs at all. She always pegged him for the seventies rock and roll type. 
“You like Hamilton?” 
Harry’s actions creak to a halt and he whips around towards where the disturbance had stemmed, spatula clutched in one hand and a marble plate stacked with pancakes in the other. His face breaks into a bright smile, voice slathered with dramatic friendliness. “Well, look who finally got up! I was starting to think you were dead, Sleeping Beauty.”
Y/N narrows her eyes at him mockingly, walking over to the kitchen counter and propping herself onto her elbows, chin in hand as she watches him set down the platter of food before her. She tips forward onto her toes, taking a deep inhale of the homey, sugary smell, letting it wash over her in flashes of childhood memories. “Are these like the ones I make?”
“Lemon and blueberry, yeah.” Harry bobs his head casually, turning around to place his metal spatula down into the sink, as well as to retrieve a glass bottle of maple syrup from one of his cupboards. “They’re pretty close, I think. I’ve never seen you use a recipe or measuring cups or anything when you make them, so I kinda eyeballed it to the best of my ability. Hope I did your nan justice.”
He pours a decently-sized glop of syrup over the mountain of treats and Y/N watches excitedly as it trickles down all the layers. He then pushes back from the table, pulling open a drawer and rummaging through, continuing to whistle along to the tune of Satisfied as he bops the cabinet closed with his hip and sets down an extra pair of forks and knives beside the plate. 
Harry cuts a neat triangle out of the pancake at the top, pointing at her with his fork as he shrugs his brows nonchalantly. “And to answer your question from before: yes, I do like Hamilton.”
“Hm. Interesting.” Y/N murmurs, going cross-eyed as Harry offers her the forkful of food in his possession, poking at her mouth playfully and getting maple syrup all over her lips. She opens obediently, allowing him to feed her the piece. “You don’t really seem like the type of guy— oh, wow, these are actually really good!”
Harry bites into his lower lip with his two front teeth, a proud smile dimpling his cheeks as the light draft from the air vent ruffles a couple of his sex-mussed ringlets across his forehead. “Yeah? You mean it?”
The mortal nods her head vigorously as she finishes chewing and swallowing, wiping away some of the leftover syrup from her top lip with her middle finger and sucking it clean. “Yeah! You hit it spot on.”
“Aces. I should be on The Great British Bake Off.” Harry makes a small, celebratory fist bump next to his hip and the childish gesture makes Y/N snort softly. 
“Like I was saying, you don’t really strike me as the type of guy who would be into musicals.” The girl comments, watching her friend cut another triangle out of the first pancake and pop it into his own mouth. 
The vampire chews thoughtfully for a second, lifting one shoulder offhandedly and swallowing fully before talking. “I’m really not, to be honest. But this specific musical is pretty good. The songs are catchy.”
He nudges the other pair of utensils across the counter for emphasis, silently inviting her to dig into the dish along with him. She accepts, slicing down the other side of the stack as he leans forward onto his elbows, mimicking her stance. He gives her a curious glance. “What about you? Do you like musicals?” 
Y/N shrugs, poking a few chunks of food onto her fork. “Not really, but I had a major Hamilton phase back in college. That’s why I recognized it.” 
Harry hums in understanding, picking a blueberry off and chewing it slowly, a sly smirk beginning to tweak the corners of his mouth. “So were you, like, a nerd back then?” 
“Well, I wouldn’t say a nerd, but I had decent grades and was pretty quiet.”
He swallows down audibly, blinking impassively. “That’s literally the definition of a nerd.” 
Y/N returns his flat expression. “Fuck off.”
Harry throws his palms up in peaceful surrender, but he still has that shit-eating grin present. “Alright, fine, fine...It’s okay if you were, though. You were probably one of those cute ones, y’know? With the clunky glasses and innocent goody-goody face.” 
“Shut up.”
“Oh, and with one of those short little plaid skirts?” He releases a pained groan, clutching his chest and closing his eyes for a second. She has no doubt he’s sketching some type of graphic image of her in his mind. “God, I bet you looked so good. Do you still have it? Can you wear it for me?”
“I said shut up!” Y/N reaches forward and stabs at his tummy lightly with her fork, ignoring the warmth crawling up her neck and across her cheeks. “Fucking perv.”
Harry smacks her utensil away with his own, giggling lightly as she tries to prick him again, continuing to fight her off. “I’m just asking a question! For science!” 
Y/N twists her fork around his, trying to outmaneuver him into dropping it. “How could my fashion sense in college possibly contribute to science in any way?” 
The vampire easily catches onto her play, slipping himself out of her grasp and trying to trap her makeshift sword down against the tabletop. He purses his lips into a simper, glimpsing up at her through his lashes and quirking his brows cheekily. “Biologically, of course. It contributes to my solo reproductive activities.”
“You are vile.” 
“Really? ‘Cause you seemed pretty happy to help with said activities last night.” 
Y/N drops her fork onto the brim of the platter, reaching up to massage at her temples and keep herself from swatting Harry’s eyeballs out of their sockets. ��I’m finished.” 
“Yeah,” the jade of his irises glimmers coyly as he sets down his utensil beside hers in a ceasefire, “you definitely finished.”
Harry chuckles boyishly as Y/N drags her palms down her face, trying to hide away how flustered he’s getting her. She decides to change the subject, not caring to steer the conversation smoothly at all, but rather jumping to another topic right away. “So does this mean you have all the lyrics memorized? Since you like them so much?” 
“I do, yeah.” Harry taps his fingers against the marble counter to the beat of the song currently playing. “Do you?” 
“I was obsessed, so of course I do.” Y/N reasons, her own digits following in tune with the immortal’s. “I think Non-Stop was probably my favorite to sing. It made for a good shower concert.”
“Well, it’s settled then.” Harry quips happily, reaching for his phone and tapping across the screen. “We’re duetting this. Right now. C’mon, Burr.”
Y/N’s motions stop, shyness creeping in from the back of her brain. “Oh, I don’t know, Harry. I never really—”
Her refusal is interrupted by the beginning of the arrangement mentioned, the notes blasting through the speaker as Harry purposefully turns up the volume to drown her out. He taps at his ear symbolically, mouthing, “Sorry, I can't hear you!” and he doesn’t even attempt to ward off the evil grin creeping across his face. 
“Harry, I’m serious—” 
But it’s already too late. Harry juts his hand out in front of him, pointing at his companion with a theatrical edge as he begins to serenade, picking up the slack of her part. 
“After the war I went back to New York. A-After the war I went back to New York. I finished up my studies and I practiced law. I practiced law, Burr worked next door!”
He looks at her expectantly, urging her to jump into the next half as her assigned role. Y/N muscles down her hesitation and recites the lines timidly with her brows creased in hesitation, but at least she’s participating. “Even though we started at the very same time, Alexander Hamilton began to climb. How to account for his rise to the top?”
Harry joins her in the next stanza, grabbing her hand midair in encouragement, trying to shake her out of her rut. “Man, the man is non-stop!”
Y/N is surprised at how well they sound harmonizing together, and she can feel her discomfort slowly begin to melt. She watches as Harry freely boasts his solo with absolutely no remorse, making grand gestures as he slides down the side of the counter, his movements dragging her along. 
“Gentlemen of the jury, I'm curious, bear with me. Are you aware that we're making history?” The boy taps at his chin to symbolize that he’s thinking, acting out the story the lyrics construct. “This is the first murder trial of our brand-new nation, the liberty behind deliberation.”
He points at Y/N once again and she does the supporting vocals, gradually beginning to gain more confidence. “Non-stop!”
“I intend to prove beyond a shadow of a doubt, with my assistant counsel—”
Harry doesn’t even have to cue Y/N this time around; she picks up her half immediately, falling into line with him flawlessly as if they’ve done this a million times before. “Co-counsel. Hamilton, sit down. Our client Levi Weeks is innocent, call your first witness.”
Harry quickly rounds the corner of the kitchen island, giving her body a grand spin as he draws closer, coming to stand right before her. She gives him a fake exasperated look to match the attitude her character depicts, shaking her head in disapproval. “That's all you had to say.”
“Okay…” The creature yanks Y/N forward into his bare chest, leaning down and flirting his lips right over hers tauntingly, eyes half-lidded in amusement. “One more thing—”
“Why do you assume you're the smartest in the room? Why do you assume you're the smartest in the room?” The girl rolls her eyes dramatically, shoving past Harry’s shoulder and she finds it humorous how these lines fit so well, almost as if they were actually directed at him, calling him out on the arrogance he always seems to dote. “Why do you assume you're the smartest in the room? Soon that attitude may be your doom.”
Harry swivels on his heel, following her as she scurries outside the kitchen entrance, running into the living room. 
“Why do you write like you're running out of time?” Y/N grabs onto one of the couch cushions, pretending to scribble over it with a fake pen. “Write day and night, like you're running out of time? Everyday you fight, like you're running out of time.”
Harry swipes at her from across the couch, trying to grasp onto the jumper she’s wearing. “Keep on fighting in the meantime.”
Y/N ducks out of the path of his grabbing hand, chucking the pillow forward and it bonks him square in the face. She sticks her tongue out at him as Harry scowls dully, climbing onto his sofa and scuttling towards her on his hand and knees.
She jumps just out of reach, diving across the other end of the furniture. The vampire throws his weight to try and tackle her to the sofa, but she just barely escapes. He ends up toppling over the backrest due to his over-abundant momentum. 
“Non-stop!” Y/N waves her middle up at him triumphantly as he pushes himself up off the ground, giving her a challenging look as he takes off after her once again. 
The pair continue to sing back and forth, with Harry chasing Y/N around the living room and kitchen as he belts out his part of the song, Y/N always somehow managing to slip from his grasp as soon as her turn hits. They’re a mess of giggles, silly faces, and boisterous actions as they reenact the play and neither can recall a time they had ever had more fun. There’s never been an instance when they felt so comfortable with another soul that they are willing to run around half-naked, screaming lyrics at each other in their underwear, not caring who sees or overhears. It just feels so second-nature.
A section of the song comes up where a woman is singing and Harry immediately takes up the part, placing his hand on his bare hip and standing in the most feminine fashion he can possibly muster, fanning at his face. “I am sailing off to London, I am accompanied by someone who always pays.” 
The exaggeration makes Y/N bend over laughing and her distraction allows Harry to nab her. He pulls her into his embrace by her forearms, cackling through the following stanza as she wriggles and squirms to try and get free. “I have found a wealthy husband who will keep me in comfort for all my days.” 
Y/N finally gives up on trying to thrash herself free, going limp against his chest and glimpsing up at him with begrudged annoyance, but a fond smile is unmistakably buckling her cheeks. Harry leans down, singing right in her face just to flaunt his victory, their noses brushing. “He is not a lot of fun, but…”
And then, there’s a shift in the ambiance between them. 
Harry gazes down at her as she giggles up at him from his arms, full of so much genuine warmth and excitement, she could power the entire city if she wanted. Her shoulders are heaving slightly as a result of all the running, there’s still faint traces of black mascara smeared under her waterline and down her cheeks from the previous evening’s exertions, she has some acne scarring littering her cheekbones that look fairly recent, and her hair looks like it could nest a family of at least ten birds. But despite these imperfections, Harry finds himself feeling oddly endeared by it all. These flaws are all things he’s gotten used to and has grown to treasure in Y/N. They make her who she is. They make her witty, and they make her clever. They make her fun, as well as trusting. They make her likeable, and energetic, and kind. They make her a good friend and a generous lover. They make her... her. Harry gets the feeling that if she didn’t have all of these traits— if even one was missing— this little arrangement they have going wouldn’t have flourished the way it did. 
Yeah, maybe he would have slept with her once or twice more just to scratch an itch, but he most likely would have let it fizzle to an end after the fact. Her personality paired with these small details— albeit, not all entirely attractive— that make up her existence play a key role in the dynamic they share. And he wouldn’t trade them for anything else— wouldn't trade Y/N for anyone else. Not anytime soon. 
A warm surge travels through his chest, filling his veins like kerosine, heating him from the heels of his socked feet to the tips of his ice cold fingers. An unorthodox swelling sensation twists inside his ribs, right where his heart used to beat, and he finds himself reciting the next line in a soft voice packed with more emotion than he’s shown or felt in the last two centuries.
“There’s no one who can match you, for turn of phrase…”
Y/N seems oblivious to all of the unsettling experiences he’s undergoing, her amused expression not changing in the slightest. Harry allows the rest of the song lyrics to pass by, the lump in his throat too heavy to fight. Instead, he just keeps staring down at Y/N with brows frowning in confusion, his breathing coming out bated and shaky, and that knot in his chest continuing to tighten until it becomes painful. He gets the sudden urge to kiss her— to feel her lips press to his and feel her give into him the way she always does. The way she has for the last four weeks. He doesn’t want it to be sloppy or desperate or sexual; he wants it to be intimate, soft, and caring. He wants it to be special. Something they share. Something only they share.
Then, that moment passes. That flicker of weakness that had leaked through vanishes and Harry feels like he can breathe properly again.
He breaks their locked eyes, releasing Y/N from his hold and taking a swift step back, coughing awkwardly to try and rid the tickling sensation in the back of his throat. He scratches at the nape of his neck nervously, fiddling with his baby curls and attempting to piece himself back together after that unexpected and unwelcome intrusion of his innermost feelings. Though, he doesn’t know if that spectacle even files under the category of emotions; from what he remembers, they aren’t supposed to tangibly attack you in such a manner. It felt more like a violation— like someone had gone in and started poking and prodding at his subconscious with a metal skewer. 
“Harry…?” Y/N inches closer to him, concern prevalent in her voice and across her features as she stretches her hand out caringly. “Are you okay? You look like you’re about to be sick.” 
“I-I’m—” His voice comes out higher than usual and quivering, so he coughs once again to get it under control, taking another step back. He's scared that if she touches him, that horrible burning sensation will come back. “I’m fine. Just...Just forgot the lyrics.” 
“Oh, okay…” The girl doesn’t sound convinced with the answer, but she lets the subject falter anyways, her hand dropping back down beside her thigh. “Just checking.” 
“Yeah, I got that. Uh, thanks. But I’m all good now.” He holds up a clenched first and juts out his pinky, wiggling it for significance. “Promise”
Y/N scoffs gently at his playful deed. “Alright, then.” 
Harry eyes her attentively as she returns to her previous spot in front of the plate of pancakes, retrieving her fork and starting to pick at them like before, as if nothing had happened. As if Harry hadn’t just almost had a cardiac arrest, despite the fact that the organ responsible had crumbled to dust ages ago.
“Are you gonna eat anymore?” Y/N signals down at the stack of pastries before her questioningly. “Because if you don’t get some now, I’ll eat them all myself. Don’t think I won’t. They’re better than the ones I make and—”
The vampire suddenly feels like bile is rising up his throat and his words spew out before he can think to stop them, though he’s not so sure he would. 
“Do you want to stay over the rest of the weekend?”
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bonny-kookoo · 4 years
Text
Hold it (JJK x Reader) 👽💜☁️🔞
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💚 Pairing: Jeon Jungkook x Reader
💚 Genre: Alien AU!, friends to lovers, fluff, angst (!), smut
💚 Warnings: (oh boy) soft boi kook, sex talk, angst, miscommunication, small argument, mentions of an animal attack, mentions of blood and a bite wound, aggressive Kookie, you all finally get your nasty time, soft sex, soft!dom Kookster, size kink, strength kink, marking, biting, bruising, manhandling, mentions of attempted masturbation, big dick kook, kook basically has an alien dick what y’all want from me, you wanted this don’t ever forget that, knotting(in a sense, like his dick inflates when he cums lol), lots of cum, transluscent tentacle action, squirting, soft confession, unprotected sex because they can’t reproduce, this is an alien Au pls use condoms in real life thank you, mildly possessive kook, aftercare, messy sex
💚 Summary: The world is literally ending. In a last effort to save earth, the race of Alcor demands humanities planet to be given into their care, as humans have been slowly killing the planet for way too long. But it’s humanity we’re talking about; they never give up without a fight. Even if they should.
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Part of the Alien!JK series!
Catch it | Hold it | Keep it | Save it | ???
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Jungkook's and your relationship slowly became.. more and more intimate you could say.
He'd openly talked about his romantic interest in you several times before, and you've grown quite fond of him as well over the course of time. You've learned that Alcorians had no understanding of sarcasm whatsoever, and typically spoke quite bluntly and openly about what they thought. It was seen as charming if you were able to speak without holding back anything, and it was something your shy self had to get used to first. Jungkook however had studied quite a lot about humans however, so by now, he was a self-proclaimed expert in human behavior. You had to admit though, he did do his homework.
Whenever Namjoon was over to check up on you, (something he had to, since it was a rule made by the alcorian government to check up on humans every month to make sure they're treated well) Jungkook proudly explained to him what he'd learned about your kind, almost like a kid showing a new drawing. He even went out to find cookbooks that described human desserts and treats just to learn how to make some of your favorite thing. It was endearing, really.
You also found out more layers of his personality.
He was incredibly sensitive to smells and fabrics, all of his blankets having a specific soft but not too soft feeling to them. He liked sweet and gentle smells, and always told you that your 'main smell' as he called it, was absolutely his favorite. Alcorians had heightened senses Namjoon had explained to you, which was why Jungkook easily picked up on things that you stayed oblivious to.
He loved if you wore his jackets or sweaters, and he most recently bought you a delicate locket bracelet with his information on it. It was beautifully made and looked great- but you still wore the collar he'd give you most of the time. When he'd asked you once you had explained to him that it was a comfort thing for you- other alcorians could easily spot that you were claimed, and wouldn't look at you funny. He'd smiled at that, and had also made sure to hug you a lot that night.
It took him a while to grow confident enough in his own ability to restrain himself during the night to let you sleep in the same bed as him. He'd been absolutely scared shitless that he'd roll you over in his sleep, but you'd assured him that he didn't move that much, so it would be fine. What he was still completely terrified of, it seemed like, was intimacy.
Now, you both had been getting as far as kissing. He loved the gesture, and loved to kiss you randomly during the day- that wasn't the issue. But whenever you tried to get him to do something more- he found some reason to simply book it before he could let himself be swept away.
And you were growing frustrated.
It wasn't that you couldn't wait for it, or that you were desperate- you could definitely give him time, if he'd finally tell you clearly if he even wanted that with you. If you thought about it, you didn't even know if Alcorians had sex like humans. Maybe they didn't do it like that, maybe they had some odd form of ritual or whatever- you had no idea, and you refused to talk to namjoon about it of all people. You knew that he would probably explain it to you, in quite detail since alcorians were like that, but you somehow wanted Jungkook to explain it to you instead. Yeah, maybe you should ask him about it- or maybe you could be difficult.
So as you laid on the bed that was way too big for you, you simply let your mind wander, having a bit of time for yourself. And as any sex-deprived human being, you decided to let your fantasies take over your mind, uncaring about Jungkook- since he'd been out for a bit, meeting up with a friend he'd said.
You wondered what he'd look like. In a lot of ways, alcorians were very similar to humans- but you somehow had a feeling that there had to be something different about their anatomy if you couldn't reproduce like Namjoon had once mentioned. Judging from his accidental boner a few days ago, you had quite the suspicion that he was.. well packaged, to say the least. He'd been a bit embarrassed about it when you'd shyly pointed it out, and ever since then, he'd made sure to get up earlier than you to avoid you seeing his morning wood, something that you'd told him was completely normal, and not at all something to be ashamed of. He seemed a bit nervous every time you brought that topic up, however, which did make you wonder.
Maybe he just wasn't into you like that? Or maybe he was a rough person in bed. The thought of that made your spine shudder, a spark igniting inside you as your mind came up with images of his hands holding your wrists above your head, those sweet lips of his tracing your skin and leaving prints of invisible fire behind. Your hand slowly wandered lower, fingers pushing against your clothed core as you practically heard him purr into your ear how good you were being for him. Was he possessive? Was he dominant? Or was he gentle and sweet? You couldn't know.
"Y/N I-" He suddenly stood in the door, making you yelp as you quickly pulled the covers over you. A useless action really, since you didn't even get to undress yourself- thankfully. If he would've arrived any later, it would've been so much more awkward. "Are you okay?" He asked, genuine and almost innocent concern in his voice as he looked at you.
This was so fucking awkward.
You could practically feel your cheeks heat up as the embarrassment hit you, realization that you almost masturbated in his bed of all places taking over your mind as you tried to come up with something to talk yourself out of it. "Yeah, yeah! Nothing wrong just eh.. tired." You said, not meeting his gaze as his brows furrowed, now fully taking you in.
You were shy about something, that much he knew. He'd studied your body language by now to a point were he knew that you were okay, but uncomfortable. Your cheeks were tinted a flushed pink, eyes not meeting his as you squeezed the sheets in your hands, legs underneath the covers moving restlessly. His eyes widened as he finally took in every aspect of the situation. Your breath was still a bit quicker than usual, the shyness, and the smell that hung in the air.
"Were you.. pleasuring yourself?" He asked, pupils dilated now that he had connected the dots. You'd been touching yourself in his bedroom, on his bed, while he hadn't been there. Why would you do that? Did you not want him like that? Did he make you uncomfortable?
"I uh.. Oh god this is so awkward." You said, dropping your face into your hands as Jungkook stepped closer, before sitting on the bed, across from you.
"Namjoon had explained to me that humans do that to feel good." He said, gaze never wavering from you as he continued. "But he also said that you only do that when you don't have a partner." He continued, now leaning forwards a bit, voice a bit whiny as he seemed confused. "You have me though? Why would you do that alone if you have me?" He asked, and you just wanted to disappear as you bit your lip, trying to explain it to him without making it sound awkward.
"Jungkook we.. we do that to mainly feel close to, you know, romantic partners." You explained, making his brows furrow even further. "Humans don't, you know, always need to go the full way." You said, as he intently listened. "Touching each other is also a way to feel close." You said, and he suddenly seemed hurt.
"So you don't see me as a romantic partner, is that it?" He said, and you could've sworn, if he had dog ears they would hang low right now with the look he has on his face. "You don't like me enough." He finalized, as you shook your head frantically.
"No Jungkook, I do like you, more than anybody just-" You tried, as his eyes got a bit more hopeful. "Its just hard to explain-" You started, as he cut you off.
"Teach me then. Show me." He said. "I want to know the human way." He almost pleaded, as you sighed.
"Jungkook, its not like I don't want to teach you.." You started, as you looked down. "We humans get uhm.. attached really quickly if we do that with a person. It's like giving away a part of yourself, you know?" You said, and he suddenly grew gentle, now fully realizing what you were on about.
"I-" He began, as he suddenly almost looked shy. "We couldn't do that anyways." He confessed, as you looked at him in question. "I'd hurt you. Thats why I want to, you know, touch you." He explained to you, a finger hesitantly running over the skin on the back of your hand. "I want to be as close to you as I can without having to worry about hurting you.." He murmured, as you took his hand in yours.
"You'd never hurt me Jungkook. I trust you-" You began, but he suddenly shook his head, serious expression on his face as he avoided your gaze.
"No." He said, slowly getting up. "Let's forget this conversation happened, okay?" He said, and you watched helplessly as he left the room. "I'll uhm.. go start dinner." He threw your way before leaving you alone with your thoughts.
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Things were tense between you and jungkook these days.
So tense in fact, that Namjoon noticed it.
"So, I'd say you're quite healthy. Jungkook takes really good care of you I see." He said with a gentle smile, making you reciprocate it in good manner. "However, I kind of have to address the elephant in the room here, as humans would say." He said, and Jungkook furrowed his brows.
"Who or what is an elephant?" He asked, and you giggled at that.
"Doesn't matter. What does however is, that I sense something wrong between you two." Namjoon said, as Jungkook suddenly got very defensive. In all honesty, it shocked you a bit, since you've never seen him like that before.
"That doesn't concern you at all Namjoon." He said, as the elder one suddenly shook his head.
"It does if it affects Y/N's mental health, which it could, in the long run." He stated, making Jungkooks eyes widen.
"Namjoon- I'm fine-" You tried, a hand reaching out for his shoulder as Jungkook dashed forwards, prohibiting you from touching him as he held your hand, a bit too tightly as you whinced, making him snap out of whatever daze he seemed to be in. He however, seemed surprised as well at his outburst.
"That's what I mean." Namjoon said, putting his equipment away. "Have you two had intercourse yet?" He bluntly asked, and you looked at him scandalized, as if he'd just told you your mom was fat. Jungkooks pupils contracted again at that, ready to bark back an angry comment, as Namjoon pushed against the youngers chest. "I assume you didn't, judging by that reaction." He commented, making you want to hide. Why were alcorians so.. blunt. "Jungkook, you either have to find yourself a partner, or I'll have to take her out of your care soon." He stated, and you almost gasped as Jungkook suddenly grew tense as well.
"W-why, you just said I take good care of her-!" He argued, making Namjoon nod.
"You do, but at the same time-" He said, gaze pointing at your now red wrist hidden with your other hand. "-but you're also a danger to her as long as you are as frustrated as you are now." He explained, making jungkook grow serious. "I can't help you with that decision. However, please keep in mind that you're not the only ones that have this form of romantic involvement. What keeps you from involving yourself Jungkook?" He asked the younger, who didn't dare look at you in that moment.
"I'll hurt her Namjoon-" He said, frustrated. "And I honestly really don't want to talk about my sexual involvement with her, thank you very much." He grumbled out between gritted teeth, eyes holding an almost aggressive stare as he looked at the elder one.
"You mean your lack thereof." Namjoon dared to say with a raised eyebrow, as Jungkook suddenly jumped up, grabbing the older one's bag and walking towards the door as he opened it with force, face clearly showing that he'd just crossed a line for him.
"I mean that it's time for you to go, Namjoon." He pressed out, as Namjoon sighed, getting up to walk out, getting no time to say goodbye.
It was probably better that way anyways.
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Things did not get better after this.
Just like Namjoon had worried about, Jungkook slowly became more and more jumpy around you, leaving you alone more and more, as if he needed to distance himself from you. Did he finally grow tired of you? Did he really suffer? Maybe you should just leave him alone for a bit you decided, walking out of the apartment and down the busy streets of the town, aimlessly walking around as you watched other alcorians go after their day. You saw couples, alcorian and mixed, walking hand in hand or simply side by side, an elderly pair watching some young kids running around with a balloon like toy, and a group of friends it seemed, happily chatting away. You spotted some streetfood, sighing internally at forgetting your tiny wallet Jungkook had given you, always containing a bit of money so you could buy yourself a snack whenever you went out. You watched as some uniformed teenagers ran towards the train station- or something that looked quite similar. It worked a bit differently, but Jungkook had once explained that alcorians had been monitoring human inventions for centuries now, taking a lot of inspiration from them.
It all felt a bit sad to you now.
Maybe you were finally growing homesick after your months of living here, or maybe it was the added fuel of Jungkooks slow but steady detachment from you that simply hurt you. But it made you feel almost hollow, and you decided you hated that feeling.
All of this felt so surreal to you.
First you loose your home, then your entire planet, and now you were close to being alone again. Why did that make you so upset though? You'd been living on your own for years now, only having fleeting friendships and a single puppy love back in school. You had no intentions of growing attached to someone, you'd sworn yourself to be independent when your mom had thrown you out years ago- but here you were, almost crying over an alien boy who'd took you in simply because he'd taken pity on you. It all felt like a sick joke.
Something in your pocked buzzed, making you snap out of your thoughts as you fished for the device, Jungkooks face smiling at you as it showed him calling. You wanted to accept the call as if out of habit, but you resisted. Maybe it was better not to.
You put it away again, getting up from the bench you'd been sitting on as you continued walking towards nowhere, suns slowly dipping low as the skies became purple and fiery red, signaling the return of night. You should turn around by now, you knew this. Alcorian nights were not only chilly but downright icy- way too cold for your fragile body, as Jungkook always said before wrapping one of his scarfs around you.
The steady buzz in your pocket was getting annoying, as you took it out, only to see that he didn't call. In fact, he'd been writing messages? Jungkook never texted.
'Where are you little one?'
'Are you mad at me?'
'Did I do something wrong? I swear I didn't mean to!'
'Please, its getting dark, where are you? Are you wearing your coat at least?'
'I'm sorry, whatever I did, please. I'm worried little one!'
You looked at the messaged with increasing guilt as another one rolled in.
'Please come home.'
You sighed, dialing his number as you wrapped your unoccupied arm around yourself, the chill now seeping into your bones slowly. Jungkook almost immediately picked up, voice breathless as if he'd run a marathon. You could faintly hear people talking in the background, and his boots on the ground as he.. ran?
"Finally! Please, where are you, I'm so worried-" He said, and you slowly felt your teeth clatter against each other as you shivered.
"I uh.. I don't know, honestly." You admitted, and Jungkook seemed to stop in his tracks.
"What do you see around you?" He asked, voice serious as you looked around.
"I- a small store, but it seems closed. There's like, a road and uhm.. a lot of plants. Looks like a forest?" You said, before something caught your eye. "There's uhm.. Something looking at me?" You said, and Jungkooks inner alarm bells were immediately ringing.
"Is there a sign that says 'Malvor' on it?" He asked, and you confirmed with a worried voice.
"Yeah uhm and- there's a dog-like thing now walking towards me?" You said, and Jungkook answered instantly.
"Dog..? Dog-! Y/N, get away from it, but dont run." He said seriously, making you swallow as you watched the creature with huge ears stalk towards you, visibly interested. It didn't seem all that harmful. "Little one, answer me. Did you get what I said?" He asked, and you answered.
"Yeah yeah I got it eh.. I'm.." You started, as suddenly, the.. dog? Whatever it was, jumped forwards, making you drop your phone as its teeth latched onto your shirt, quickly loosing interest in the fabric as it decided to take your arm instead- spiky teeth immediately breaking skin as you yelped out, trying to open its mouth with your unoccupied hand. The commotion was loud enough to lure out an alcorian man nearby, who gruffly threw stray pebbles at the animal, scaring it off after a moment.
"Fuck- are you okay?" The stranger asked, bright cateyes looking down at you as he turned around. "Joon! Come down!" He yelled, as you looked into the direction with teary eyes, spotting- Namjoon?
"Oh Y/N- what happened?" He asked, suddenly visibly worried as he looked at you, immediately helping you up and leading you inside the house nearby that seemed to be his apartment. He looked different, now that he didn't wear his work attire. He almost looked domestic. "Set her down there, I'll go get a first aid kit." He said, before you were led to sit on a couch, the person that threw pebbles before sitting down next to you.
"I'm Jin. We'll fix you right up, okay?" He softly said, voice gentle and reminding you of the store owner down on earth who always let you roam around inside the store during winter. "Don't cry, it's gonna be okay. Encounters with Velvens can be scary yeah?" He consoled you, hands holding your arm gently as he waited for Namjoon to get everything he needed. You sniffled, trying not to cry, but it got harder the more you tried not to look down. As soon as you did, you began to feel nauseous as Jin pulled at your chin. "No no no don't look sweetheart." He said, before Namjoon came downstairs.
"These things are getting progressively more daring these days." He mumbled as he took out scissors to cut the sleeve of your shirt. "I tell you, it's because that damn lady feeding those goddamn things!" He complained, as Jin sighed. You looked at him for a second, taking in his appearance. He had broad shoulders, and an absolutely charming face- his bright eyes contrasting his dark hair as he held a gentle smile on his plush lips, trying to calm you down it seemed. "I'll give you a tiny injection okay? Its to numb your arm, or otherwise it'll hurt too bad." Namjoon explained, and you nodded, even though you were internally terrified. "one two- there we go!" He hummed out, Jin steadily running his hand over your back as he watched you.
"You're so brave young lady." He complimented, velvet voice helping a bit to ease your worry. It wasn't just your encounter with whatever that thing was, but also the fact that for the first time, you were somewhere without Jungkook- and it made you extremely anxious to say the least. Thats when you remembered your phone.
"My phone-" You began, before someone knocked at the door- or more like, tried to kick it in, it seemed. The voice that rang through the room through the door however, was familiar to your ears.
"Y/N! Namjoon, Jin, have you seen her?! There's- oh god there's blood out here-" He said worried, as Jin slowly stood up, opening the door as he simply pointed towards your form, sitting on the couch as Namjoon cleaned the bite wound. At the sight of him, all worried and out of breath, the guilt suddenly flooded your mind as you teared up, finally cracking up as the tears ran down your cheek, a sob escaping you as you began to cry. "Oh little one-" He immediately said, running towards you. 
  Jin looked from you to Jungkook worried. "Why is she crying now? Is she scared?" He asked confused, as the second oldest in the room shook his head.
  "Probably the shock. It's normal for humans, they're a bit more sensitive to these things, remember?" He said softly, as Jin nodded.
  Jungkook didn't seem to care about what was said as he squatted down next to Namjoon, hand running over your head before it cupped your cheek, his eyes blown wide open as he looked at you, then at the wound. "She's gonna be okay right?" He asked, and Namjoon nodded.
"It pulled a bit on her arm, which did a good amount of damage, but its only a surface wound, surprisingly." He explained. "I'll stitch the biggest spots, and bandage it." He said, and Jungkook nodded. "You'll be able to do it afterwards if you watch me do it, right?" He asked, and Jungkook nodded, serious, as he held your other hand. He sat down, close to you, as he now took over Jins earlier part of rubbing your back. "And there we go." Namjoon said, as he finished it. "I'd give you pain medicine but I don't have anything for humans. I'll give you some kids medication instead. That should be fine." He explained, as he gave Jungkook a small package. "Please keep an eye on her from now on. She's gotten away this time, and I wont ask why she was so far away from you in the first place. But the next time this happens, I will have to report it Jungkook." He said, making Jungkook lower his head as he nodded.
He took off his jacket as he threw it over your shoulders, picking you up as he said his goodbyes to Jin and Namjoon, walking out with you in his arms.
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"Jungkook?" You carefully asked one night, making him humm as he confirmed that he was listening. "I.. want to know." You said, and it took him a moment until he turned on the light beside the bed, leaning on his arm as he looked at you questioningly. "You said, you're sure you'd hurt me. I wanna know why." You said, and he sighed, before he sat up.
"I uhm.." He started, as he scratched the back of his neck. "I'ts just, not gonna fit." He explained, as you tried to push your shyness to the side.
"But you know.. we haven't tried yet-" You began, as he shook his head.
"I said no." He sternly said, making you visibly deflate as he sighed again.
"I.. we could still, you know.." He began, and you looked at him, as he seemed to struggle a bit with his words. "I know you want to be close to me, and I want that too." He said, and you sat up now as well, looking at him.
"It's okay if you want to be with someone else-" You began, but he groaned, as if he was frustrated.
"No! Now I get why you left that day.." He held your head in his hands as he looked at you with gentle eyes. "I don't want anyone else that's not you little one." He confessed, and you just stared, as he leaned in, connecting his lips with yours.
Usually, his kisses were more like little pecks, small gestures of affection, never to lead to anything else. But this time, he asked for it. It was as if he'd let himself loose, kissing you fully for the first time, not backing away like typically when you leaned in with need. He parted your lips with his tongue, hands lowering themselves as they moved over your arms, resting on your thighs as he closed his eyes, loosing himself in the feeling of you. He finally moved around a bit, laying you down on your back as he towered over you, body shielding you away from the world as his hands finally explored your bare skin underneath the small layer of clothing you wore, chuckling as you whined when his hand softly squeezed one of your breasts, loving the soft feeling of it. "You're so cute." He whispered, making you squirm underneath him as his breathing quickened, holding himself back from absolutely ruining you.
He suddenly took off his shirt, helping you out of yours as he growled at the fact that you didn't wear a bra at all to sleep. It didn't really bug him usually, but now, he wondered how he managed to contain himself next to you for all these nights next to you, the only thing between his and your skin a mere piece of fabric. Your skin was pure sin underneath his fingertips as he felt himself twitch inside his sweats. He needed to get out of them.
He helped you out of your shorts, taking your underwear with them as his gaze got stuck on the small strand of glistening wetness clinging to the fabric of your panties. It was a clear sign how aroused you were, and it was an absolute compliment towards him in his own eyes- the fact that he could rile you up like this so quickly made him feel proud in a way. He growled almost at the sight, hand immediately finding its way downwards as his fingers teasingly running over your folds, his face showing how mesmerized he was by your body's reaction to him.
There was a reason alcorian woman were envious of human ones- and Jungkook finally found some reasoning behind the 'human-kink' going on with the arrival of your race on his homeplanet. Your body just screamed fertility at him, and it made him desperate as he finally got rid of the last pieces of clothing.
You didn't quite know what you were expecting, but your mind was empty as you made eye contact with his painfully erect length.
He was practically oozing precum at this stage, standing proudly as you somehow understood now where his worries came from. To be quite blunt about it, he looked quite normal, a little bigger even for his own body height, apart from the soft looking growth on the base of himself. "It looks odd to you, doesn't it?" He saig as he chuckled a bit hesitantly, having watched your reaction to him. You shook your head however, smiling as you reached for his shoulders, pulling him down again as you kissed his lips. He smiled into it, hands never leaving your skin as you felt him against your inner thigh, growing uneasy that he was so close- but still too far away.
"Hm I told you no little one.." He hummed against your neck as he left open mouthed kisses there, teasingly biting the skin there from time to time as you whined. "But there's other things we can do, don't worry.." He whispered, as he suddenly moved you a bit, careful not to be too rough as he lined your wet center up, the back of your thighs leaning on top of his as he sat on his knees, his cock resting between your lower lips. He almost let out a whine at the feeling of your warmth just underneath him as he simply let his length move over your core as you mewled at the feeling of him rubbing over your clit. He squeezed his eyes shut, summoning all his self control as he dropped down, hands gripping your thighs, yet gentle enough not to seriously hurt you.
He suddenly shifted again, leaning down with his chest first onto the mattress first as he threw your legs over his shoulders, leaking core exposed to him as he licked a stripe up your folds, teasing you as you tried to keep your legs apart. He hummed against you, making you whine out pleadingly as he entered a finger of his, groaning at the feeling of you already clenching around him. "You're so soft little one.." He praised, adding another finger as he began to stretch you out, making you grasp the sheets below you in desperate fists. Digit after digit he tested the waters, stretching you out more and more as you became restless, suddenly tensing up as you felt yourself close. "My little human gonna cum?" He questioned, leaning his head on the inside of your upper thigh as he began to stimulate your most sensitive bundle of nerves, watching in absolute adoration as you suddenly mewled out, core clenching around nothing as he slowed down his movements, letting you ride it out. He smiled down at you as he gently placed your legs back down, giving you a moment to breathe as you looked at him, or his still very uncomfortable looking errection between his legs.
"Please koo.. lets just try-" You began, as he furrowed his brows, gasping as your fingers reached down, barely reaching the sensitive head of his member as he tried to deny your request.
He couldn't.
"I'll.. You have to tell me when its too much, please-" He pleaded, and you nodded frantically, happy to finally have him give you everything you wanted. "Okay, okay.." He chanted, as if to calm himself down, his tensed up thighs a clear sign of his own frustration. He slowly aligned himself with your core, gently pressing his head into your patiently waiting hole, as you closed your eyes, trying to not concentrate on the sting. "Shh.. please relax little one-" He chanted as he took it as slow as possible. "Please relax, I won't get it in if you're too tense baby.." He said, the petname making you melt under his gaze as you took a deep breath, slowly loosening up for him as he was slowly able to push himself inside more and more, watching as he could see himself slightly move inside you just underneath your lower belly.
He didn't know why exactly, but he loved the sight of it.
You looked to absolutely adorable in a way, speared on his length as he rubbed his thumbs over your hipbones, careful as ever not to make it too painful for you. "You're taking me so well, you're so perfect for me.." He hummed out, as you suddenly twitched underneath him when his weird small growth touched your sensitive clit, making him chuckle. "You know.." He suddenly said, voice deep and dark as you felt yourself shiver. "They say human females can cum multiple times.." He explained, making you open your eyes a bit in question. "I wonder if that's just a rumor?" He mused, watching you as you looked a bit confused. "Alcorian girls rarely ever cum.." He explained, as you slowly connected the pieces, somehow understanding what he was saying. You'd heard that before as well, that Alcorians had a hard time really getting pregnant and since woman rarely ever orgasmed, men had to step up their game evolution wise Namjoon had said, but you hadn't really asked what he meant by that. But now that you've noticed it, it did make sense; the weird stimulating.. whatever that was, the amount of precum that seemed almost ridiculous for human standards- it made you wonder what else he was hiding.
"There we go.." He finally said, not fully inside, but knowing that this was as far as he could go with you. There was no way he could fit himself inside you fully, and he knew that. He simply let yourself adjust for a moment, before he moves, a moan leaving him as he bit his lip, trying to keep his pace slow and steady for you as you arched your back enticingly, making him grab at your chest. "You're so- enchanting-" He gasped out between breaths, an almost sobbing sound escaping him without tears as he finally realized how close he was with you. He was connected in the most intimate of ways, and he could finally see why humans found pleasure in an act as basic as this.
You felt like home, warm and comforting.
You became a bit jumpy as something foreign seemed to touch you- warm and gentle, but you couldn't quite make out it's shape or form. It was blurred, as if summer heat was distorting the scene for you, and you wondered immediately if this was just your imagination. But Jungkook noticed your confusion immediately it seemed, smiling a bit shyly at you. "They're uhm.." He tried to think of a good way to explain it while having foggy thoughts, still buried so deep inside you. "we call them ferons.." He hummed, and you reached out, fingers immediately retracting at the weird feeling of them. "They're usually.. not visible-" He gasped out, chuckling at the way you seemed so interested in them. "They're ah-.. they're a remnant of when we uh.. had to survive on our own." He explained, as one of them gently moved over your ribs, a touch similar to warm water- just without the wet feeling. It was more like a red warming lamp shining on your skin. "They must be weird to you, hm?" He asked, head dipping down as you smiled, hand finding its way into his hair as you closed your eyes again, letting yourself go into his care without worry.
"Nothing about you is weird to me, Jungkook." You hummed out, and he kissed your skin in exchange.
As if to thank you silently for accepting him.
His lips parted, face dipped down to mouth at your neck, as he breathlessly pleaded. "Can I mark you?" He chanted, as if he was in a trance. "Please let me mark you.. please little one, let me make you mine.." He said, and you nodded, unknowing to what exactly you'd just agreed to.
You found out quite quickly, as he suddenly took a small bit of skin between his teeth, now biting with much more force until he tasted a slight taste of iron on his tongue, leaving marks all along your neck and collarbone, bruises already blooming to blossom into beautiful shades of purples and greens, his mark staying behind for a long time. He smiled as if he was high, loosing himself in the feeling of your body underneath him as you suddenly quivered, whining out as you pushed your head into the mattress below you, making your back arch as he continued at his pace, going a bit faster as something moved over your clit, something holding your hips in place as you suddenly snapped, orgasm rushing through you as you finally flew over the edge, your thighs trembling as you felt wetness escape you, making him release a sound that sounded awfully like a growl.
Suddenly he came- and you felt like you were splitting into two.
Something was happening inside you, growing in size, as he was suddenly locked in place it seemed, hands carefully running over your head as he started to frantically console you. "It's okay, its okay.." He repeated in a soothing way as you felt him spill inside you to no end it seemed, feeling how he stretched you even more inside. You felt like you'd burst any second. "Ngh.. you're taking it so well, so good, so perfect.." He exhaled, letting his forehead fall against your shoulder as he breathed heavily. "You're okay, you're fine.." He hummed as he slowly felt you calm down as he stayed still, waiting for his cock to soften up again and deflate, as he kissed your cheeks, your nose, your lips in absolute adoration, warm ferons warming up your still shivering legs. "My god you're so sweet-" He murmured. "So absolutely perfect-" He continued. "And mine.. only mine.. my little human.." He sang almost as he kissed the marks he'd left behind.
It felt odd as he finally softened up, cum instantly seeping out of you as he was able to comfortably slip out of you. You whined at the empty feeling and he cooed at you. "I'm so sorry- I originally was planning on pulling out before that happened, but then you... did that and-" He chuckled, as he kissed your nose again, making you giggle. "I love you." He confessed, and you opened your eyes, gaze locking with his.
"I love you too."
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"You could've warned me of your.. weird invisible tentacles and all that-" You started randomly as he threw his head back, cheeks dursted pink as he held his hands over his face in embarrassment.
"Stop-!" He whined, as you laughed your heart out.
"I thought you alcorians didn't feel shame all that much about this stuff?" You teased, as he looked at you, playfully angry stare sent your way, before he got up from his spot, throwing you over his shoulder.
"Oh I'm gonna show you how unashamed we are."
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haechanokeh · 3 years
Text
I'm Right For You [pt 7]
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pairing: popular college! mark x average! reader
genre: romance, smut, angst, series.
warning (general): corruption, oral sex (both receiving and giving), cream pie, rough sex, mention of religion, rough sex, self-esteem, public sex, sub! reader, sex toys. possessive mark two-faced mark
[teaser] [ Chapter 1 ] [ Chapter 2 ] [ Chapter 3 ] [Chapter 4] [Chapter 5] [Chapter 6]
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you are shoving your face on the table because of embarrassment. when you're back to your senses you realize the mess you made in the lee's carpet and dining table. if they knew what happened they would probably not going to use this table.
mark was just laughing at you and watching you mumbling to yourself about how humiliating you are and naming yourself dumb or idiot. you already finished your food and took your paracetamol though the orgasm did relieve your headache but you should still drink paracetamol just in case.
"okay stop that, i'll walk you home." you heard a dragging noise of a chair against the carpet. you look up and mark was carrying your bag already. "okay..." you whispered and stood up too. he chuckled and put his hands behind you.
"don't over think. they will not notice it, i already cleaned it but..." he moved his lips closer to you ear. "but the scent of sex is hard to cover. " he was just teasing you and you totally fell for it.
your jaw dropped and your heart began to beat in a fast face because of panic. "What should we do? what should we do?"
"don't think too much about it. right now, let's get you home, hmm?" he gave you an assuring smile though you're still worrying about the smell you just let him drag you out.
both of you were walking talking about what you did these past few days, and giving him your recommended netflix series and movies. he's nodding, listening, and giving you reactions. mark was just cherishing the moment with you and you enjoy his company. you were being talkative because you really missed him and enjoy his company. mark on the other hand, cherishes every moment with you and he liked your talkativeness.
when you reached the front of your house, you were kind of disappointed and it was written all over your face.
"lock your doors." mark told you, he's worried about your safety after learning that your mom is away. he secretly jog every night to midnight to check your house in the days were chose to ignore you. of course he doesn't want to tell you that.
"is he going?" you don't want him to go yet.
"what?" his brows furrowed.
"what?" you confusingly asked back.
"what, you want me to stay?" he pointed at himself with his index.
you bit your lower lip and squeezed your eyes. your mouth doesn't cooperate well to you brain and will get you in trouble someday. your mouth literally didn't receive some signals that there are things meant to be kept in mind.
"no, no. don't mind me, your parents will comeback, shoo shoo they are looking for you." you said with your hands shooing.
"i mean i can stay if you want. they will just think i am sleeping and if they catch me going home late they will just think that i went for a jog." he stepped forward.
your eyes lock with mark's and you stay still. he lower his gaze to your lips. your chest feeling some weights. mark was finally leaning forward, hand at the back of your head and pulled you gently towards him. lips parted at first and when you felt his soft lips intertwined with you, you couldn't help but to feel the bliss.
this is what mark can make you feel.
you were sharing a slow kiss at first. mark pulled you closer wanting more. he locked your lips, sucking yours that made you moan and grab his shoulder. he slid his tongue inside you, moving in and out and massaging your tongue. you squeezed your thigh in arousal. the blood rushing inside your body, experiencing heat and excitement.
he slowly pulled away his lips and gripped your hips pulling you towards him. you felt mark's bulge under his pants.
"i need you so badly." mark murmured.
"let's get inside." you pulled him.
once you closed the door when you entered the house, it turned into havoc. you're now against the wall, naked. mark sucking your nipples, his left hand squeezing your other breast and this right rubbing your centerfolds that are still wet from your orgasm before the dinner. your leg is clinging around his waist, hands playing his hair and mouth parted producing breathy moans.
mark capture your lips again. your hand reached for his hardness and rubbed him against his pants. he groaned and tugged at your lips. you met his eyes and you saw his dark side again.
you pulled mark's dick out of his pants and pumped it and your thumb pressing the tip of its head. you felt proud when he moaned louder in your lips.
"fvck y/n, i want you so much. pull my pants down, now." he said in a needy voice. you quickly obliged, you were on your knees and ready to take him through your mouth... which you expect but surprisingly he pulled you up. "i don't need that right now, i want to fuck you up so bad."
he grabbed your legs and put it around his hips. your sexes were touching each other. you couldn't help but to move because just like him, you want him inside. he kicked the small table and it hit your favorite long sofa, connecting it. he put you at your small living room table. he lightly slapped your cheek.
"on your fours." mark commanded. your eyes widen.
"right here?" referring to the coffee table.
"yes." he replied. though you were hesitating you followed him. on your knees and hands on the sofa. he showed you his palm. "spit on it, baby."
of course, you're the submissive here, you spit on it. he used it to lubricate around his dick. he caressed your ass.
"do you want me to continue?" making sure that this is mutual.
"yes, please." you're growing impatient now. he snickered.
mark put his knee on the coffee table and slowly inserted his length on your. both of you groaned because of your tightness.
"baby, you're tight for me." he told you. even though you couldn't see him because he's behind you, his image of being frustrated is hella hot and it made you pussy clench. "ah, shit y/n." he cursed in pleasure.
mark slowly thrusted his hip and gripped your hips with light hands. after a few slow thrusts he leaned forward, he began to fasten the pace and kissed your shoulder and arm wrapped around your waist while rubbing your clit fast and hard. his other hand is on your hip and sometimes smacking your behind leaving a pink print but you're not complaining.
"gawd, mark!" he eyes twitched when you felt his roughness.
"yes, baby?" he grunted. your arms lost its strength causing you to shove your cheek on the sofa, your mouth opened.
"ohhh mark, right there! right there!" your eyes flickered and mouth drooling. your toes curled and ass lifted up more in pleasure.
you screamed on top of your lungs. reached your orgasm. however, mark hasn't reached his release.
he leaned forward to whisper in your ears.
"can you do one more for me, y/n?" he kissed the behind of your ear. you nodded weakly. "good girl."
mark felt your cunt clenched. he smiled. "my y/n want to be called a good girl?" the inner dom appeared
you didn't answer still in your euphoria. he turned your body, your back lying on the sofa. he lifted your back to carry you and switched the position. he's now sitting on the sofa, legs spread on the table. you're sitting his pelvis and chest against his chest while face on the crevice on his neck.
"do you still want to be called a good girl?" he asked but didn't answer. he grabbed your jaws and pushed it away to see your face. "answer me." his voice was deep and full of authority. he squished your cheeks.
"yes." you replied in fear mix with excitement. he removed his hands away from your face and put it on the sides of your face.
"put my dick in." he ordered. you use your remaining strength to lift yourself. you hold the base of his dick and guide it to penetrate you. you sighed and purred as you felt your still sensitive pussy.
"move." he slapped your ass and squeezed it.
mark looking up to you with eager face and stare at your erotic face, moaning as you move. you're gripping his shoulders as your support.
"look at me, love, don't close your eyes." he hissed. with your doe eyes, you stare at him. "fucking beautiful." mark admires every single feature of your pleasured face.
you are bouncing using all your remaining strength but you swear, you have nothing left and it made you burst into tears because of frustration. you want to make him and you to cum but you're losing your strength.
"mark, mmhh i can't anymore." you cried-moan, tears rolling on your cheeks. mark bit his lip at how sexy your fucked up look. you said those words but still trying to move, you don't want to break the momentum.
"tell me what to do, y/n. what does my good girl want?" he wanted to be a little playful to you. you put your forehead against his and locked eyes with him.
"please fuck me mark, hard and rough." you told him. mark didn't expect you to be this bold but gawd he liked it. he pecked your lips.
"got it." he said. he held your waist and once he lifted his pelvis, there's no stopping.
every time he thrust up, mark makes sure that his full length is inside you but never decreases the speed. it sends your senses to another universe, you're chanting mark's name through your drooling mouth, eyes rolling and trying not to break eye contact with mark through your fluttering lashes.
you are bouncing effortlessly because of his powerful thrusts and every time he hits you, your legs twitched and tears coming out from your eyes. you are losing your grip in his shoulder, even the tips of your fingers have no energy, it was as if mark sucked everything.
"mark..." you whimpered.
"why are you crying? do you like it this much?" he whispered between his moans. half of his brain doesn't want you to cry, he hate it but learning that you cry because of pleasure, he badly wants to make you cry more.
"i want to cum." you mewled. he snickered.
"greedy, you already cummed twice today." mark pecked the tip of your nose. why is he soft and rough at the same time? "but for you love, i will give everything you ask."
he became rougher, harder, and faster, mark unleashed the beast he's been hiding. air started to knock out of your lungs and jaw dropped, eyes flickering, and you became a moaning mess.
"i missed you so much, it was a torture every time i see you at school but not able to touch you." mark growled and nails digging in your flesh . "i love you so much, i fucking love you and accept it y/n, because if you don't... i will force you. you can't run from me, do you understand." you saw a glimpse of the spine-chilling face he's wearing.
he settled you in his pelvic, dick still inside you. he stopped thrusting and he earned a whining protest from you for stopping.
"answer me or i will stop this." he warned you.
"yes! yes, please mark don't stop!" you can't think straight, you were having a hard time understanding him but whatever it is you're sure that he's professing his love for you again.
mark moved his hips again. your skins slapping, though you couldn't moan, mark is quite loud. your body started to switch, you want to tell him you're cumming already but you became voiceless.
"i'm cumming, fuck." mark said through his gritting teeth. he pushed your down and deep, he hit your spot. both of you reached your climax. you can feel his fluid fully occupied your hole.
both of you stayed still, your face shoved in his neck. mark showered the side of your face with soft kisses.
"sleepy?" he hummed. you nodded. "you did well, baby."
mark effortlessly carried you and bring you to your bed. he laid on the bed beside you. you rolled to face him.
"i love you." he said, not expecting anything from you because typically you don't reply when he says that.
but because you're full of surprises and once again your mouth didn't cooperate with your brain. you unconsciously whispered words that made mark startle.
"i love you too." and everything became blank.
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✨if you want to be added in I’m Right For You Tag List, you can DM or Ask me so i can add you ✨
Tag List: @cloudykeiji @jjikyuu @sunshinedhyuck @wassup-haeyadwae @erisxczenie @mrklyy @resceluwu @jenotation @wanlore
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marsbutterfly · 3 years
Note
Armin and Science!Loving!Male Reader going on a science museum date together with lots of fluff please?
Note: Hey anon, so I tried for a bit and I can't quite write a full story for a male reader that I am satisfied with and I don’t want to post something anything less than my very best. But I did write headcanons with male!reader to make it up for it. If you want, I would be willing to do a full fic with gender neutral!reader once requests are open again and I’m so sorry, really. I tried :(
A Day At The Museum
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Wattpad Version!
"Y/N you're going too fast'" The blonde boy's voice makes its way past the crowd behind you.
It's not until you turn around that you realize how further back he is. In all your excitement, you rushed across the street towards the museum, not realizing Armin had fallen behind.
"Sorry." You say, a warm sensation growing on your cheeks. "I got too into it"
He is finally able to reach you, placing his body forward while putting his hands on his knees. As he tries to catch his breath, you take a minute to look at the pamphlet that rested in your pocket.
“Where do you want to start?” You ask him, your eyes flying through every word printed out on the piece of paper. 
Armin finally stands, his face returning to its natural shade. “Whatever you want to do first sounds great.” He smiles and adjusts his glasses, though you can still hear a quiet wheeze in his voice.
“Do you need your inhaler?” You reach for your back pocket but he puts his hands up, rapidly shaking his head.
“I’m fine.” He tells you. “Let’s go in!” 
You nod and take his hand on yours, eagerly making your way inside the large building ahead, gently dragging Armin with you. 
Headcanons
- The very first thing you see at the museum is a big t-rex fossil. Your eyes shine with excitement and Armin can’t help but smile as he admires your face.
- “Did you know they had jaws so powerful they could crush a car?” You say, pointing at the T-rex and Armin shakes his head. 
- He did in fact know that because you’ve said it about a million times, but he always nods and acts as if it is the very first time.
- While you’re busy counting the dinosaur bones, Armin goes up to pay for your ticket and he comes back with a little blue bracelet.
- He takes your hand on his, gently wrapping the itchy paper around your wrist before planting a very gentle kiss on your hand. Your cheeks burn in embarrassment
- He wraps his arm around you as you look at the map, trying to decide where to go. He nuzzles his face against yours, feeling the gentle bumps of your growing beard. It’s one of his favorite feelings, even if it pricks him.
- “I want to do it all, I don’t know where to start!” You say, distress evident in your voice and he snorts gently.
“Why don’t we start by going around the fossils, into the exhibition about cave men technology and once we get to the Wonders Of Medicine we can stop and look at the map once again?” He suggests and you can tell he had already prepared for this visit.
- A small piece of paper stands out of his pocket and you can see a small drawing with the most famous exhibitions, your heart feels like it’s going to explode with love for him.
- You read every word on every single plaque. Your eyes move around so fast it would give you a headache if it wasn’t for all the excitement and caffeine that rushes through your body.
- “Armin, look! They have replicas of the first ever scalpel, isn’t it amazing??” You ask euphorically and he nods.
- He holds your hand the entire time or find some way to always touch you. A few people shoot a few glares while others look at the two of you with love in their eyes. Either way, you’re happy to be there with your boyfriend.
- When the clock strikes 11:30am, Armin decides it would be a good idea to go wait in line at the restaurant while you finish exploring the space section of the museum.
- He awaits in line and ends up choosing the astronaut meal, which is literally what it sounded like. An exact portion of the food astronauts eat in space and you can’t hide your thrill once you see the tray in his hand.
- By the time you’re done eating, it’s already 12:35pm and the 3D exhibition of “The History Of The World” is starting in 10 minutes. You rush towards there, only to realize you needed to buy a ticket with days in advance.
- You feel your heart getting crushed but silently, you walk back to Armin. He knew how excited you were for this and so he reaches for his backpack, pulling out two tickets.
- Your face lights up immediately and you smile so hard your lips hurt. You can’t help but shake your hands in excitement while wrapping your arms around his neck. He laughs, wrapping his own arms around your waist.
- “I just want to make you happy.” He says.
- “You make me happy every day.” You reply and place a gentle kiss on his lips.
- Happily, you watch the show while holding his hand tightly. 
- By the end of the day, after sharing kisses at every exhibition and taking selfie after selfie for your scrapbook, you get to the final hallway: The Wonderlab, where you get to interact with the images and make new ones.
- You are so distracted by the colorful lights that you don’t even notice when he gets on his knees, a little box in his hand. The only reason you begin to pay attention to your surroundings is due to the amount of happy gasps around you.
- Your eyes land on him, his blonde hair shinning in the UV lights, the smile on his face so big you can see his dimples and you can nearly see his heart beating in his chest, lord knows yours is racing like a horse.
- “I wanted to make this day perfect, so I was wondering if you would marry me?” He says, a blush spreading across his cheeks and you laugh.
- “Yes, of course yes!” You reply, a few happy tears streaming down your face as he places the ring on your finger. Immediately after he gets up, you seal your lips on his.
- Days at the museum were always your favorite.
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ecoamerica · 25 days
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youtube
Watch the American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 now: https://youtu.be/bWiW4Rp8vF0?feature=shared
The American Climate Leadership Awards 2024 broadcast recording is now available on ecoAmerica's YouTube channel for viewers to be inspired by active climate leaders. Watch to find out which finalist received the $50,000 grand prize! Hosted by Vanessa Hauc and featuring Bill McKibben and Katharine Hayhoe!
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nodameshield · 3 years
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I know we all positively *lost it*, hats down because, truly, what an episode:
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Prof. Cerise is a big kid at heart and I respect that.
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yeah, a nice legend!! ☺️☺️ (bless this child, he’s too pure)
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research fellows count! (I just really love it every time their work is acknowledged)
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in today’s episode of Ash’s hero complex is gonna get us killed one of these days ⬆️
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you see my child’s face in these??? you see the split second decision he makes and how he is immediately determined to keep Suicune safe??? that is the resolve of a hero !! there was no greed and no premeditation, just quick-wit and a lot of heart. I’m so proud. 
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imagine being so in sync with your partner that they immediately know what you were trying to do, and have values so well-aligned that they’re ready to put themselves on the line so you can achieve your common goal. the stuff of soulmates, that.
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I've seen you do this a handful of times this gen around, and it doesn’t get old. I love you, gods I love you. thank you for having such a big heart and being such a knucklehead. I truly adore you.
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big sigh no comment they’re truly the perfect partners aren’t they. ugh. love.
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bless you, Sobble, you were really gonna risk it all for your trainer, weren’t you, little one? (seriously though these two jumped to protect their trainer from a hostile force in a nanosecond, and prior to this Cinderace actually instinctually jumped to protect Suicune, talk about being in sync with your partner!! Cinderace is so good at reading the environment!! he’s a protector by nature !! and good at following its instincts, too !! proud !!)
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it was all about character development so let’s also appreciate how my boy can now climb by himself !! his boyfriend wasn’t there to take his hand and pull him through but Goh is now an athletic boy as well and he did this with only a little sweat. kudos to that, too.
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Ash had counted but invaluable moments in this episode. can we just take a moment to admire how he was stressed as well (balled fist and stealth pose), but still had the leadership to comfort Lucario??? this is the stuff Pokémon masters are made of, I've heard.
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I'm in a lot of trouble and hiding but I still have half-the-mind to think of my better half, who is also in a lot of trouble and hiding, I really love him I hope he’s all right...
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Raichu !! babygirl where have you been, good to see ya. I've also been racking my head trying to understand if Goh actually carries that big-old backpack empty on the regular? but he also magically manifested the sprays from within the backpack some moments later?? there’s a hanging pouch at the top??? I’m looking too much into it?? definitely. all in all kudos to his smart mind and his big heart.
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was Goh trying to contact Ash here??? Officer Jenny?? my bet is on the former bc, well,,, of course. he sounded so worried, it must’ve been Ash. (Who has a phone for the kicks, it seems, because he never freaking picks it up...)
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He literally just captured it, but is already so worried for their well-being, and you dare tell me this boy hasn’t grown?? that he doesn’t care for his Pokémon?? HÁ (also, two Pokémon in a day! kudos on a positive catch day for Goh)
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my blood was boiling at watching those poachers attacking Suicune while it was already down. I'm in agreement with everyone else here who noticed how much Goh cared, how worried he was, and how his growth from chapter three until now shines in this moment.
bonus for his surprise/relief the moment he heard his friends to the rescue.
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this sequence was power. also, Goh’s mantra count !! (no, but seriously, they are so impossibly well-matched for one another it’s not even funny anymore, I’m just a mess over their relationship).
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“ - and don’t worry, I’ll look after Satoshi”
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proud husband smile
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Shoutout to lil Pikachu saluting Officer Jenny! sweet little thing, you.
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IMAGE BEING SO IN SYNC WITH YOUR PARTNER THAT THEY IMMEDIATELY KNOW WHAT YOU’RE TRYING TO DO, AND HAVE VALUES SO WELL ALIGNED THAT THEY LOOK AT YOU THIS FONDLY BECAUSE THEY KNOW, THEY’VE BEEN HERE AS WEL AND THEY GET IT, AND THEY ARE SO PROUD.
the stuff of soulmates, that.
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prolly gonna print this one, too. to remember how proud I am of Goh every single day. 
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Imagine --- well, you get it.
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in case you missed it, Mr. Voiceover reminds us what really happened on this episode, Goh formed a bond with Suicune, he proved himself as a good partner/trainer, and earned Suicune’s trust. that’s what happened. he’s pure and kind and worthy of a legendary Pokémon’s trust, and he’s gonna continue growing and keep working hard towards his dream. he’s been mature and wise and big-hearted, and I love him. and that’s it.
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kiseki-no-scenarios · 3 years
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After a ridiculously long delay...(being a resident is crazy busy and I’ve barely had time to sleep let alone write T_T) I present part two of this prompt! 
Kise and Murasakibara with Reader who gets lots of confessions 
Kise
While your boyfriend projected a “cool, easygoing” image of himself in his many photoshoots and interviews, you knew exactly what the blond-haired child model was really like in his normal life.
When the two of you had been captured by paparazzi out during a lunch date, suddenly, you were the focus of everyone’s attention. You’d expected it from Kise’s fangirls, who often followed him around and had screeching voices and shouts that could easily beat out the pitch of a banshee, but you weren’t expecting the sudden surge of admirers you had.
Whether it was a combination of sheer curiosity, or some sort of weird attraction the opposite sex had towards you, suddenly you were getting confessed to left and right.
It had gotten to the point where now, not only were females present during Rakuzan’s practice sessions, you had your own set of male students that came to watch you do your thing. Your job as a manager, noting down stats and planning out drills.
Nebuya offered to scare them all off, his biceps bulging as he scowled towards the ever growing group of people, but you figured they weren’t hurting anyone, and were surprisingly respectful of your space. So you let it go.
Until one day, when you couldn’t open your locker.
“Did someone change the combination?” You muttered to yourself, yanking on the steel latch, giving it another tug. What you didn’t expect was to literally get hit in the face by what seemed like the equivalent of a rose garden shoved into an admittedly small space.
And, all you could see was Kise. Well, not the actual Kise-although that boy had flexibility *wink wink cough cough*, even he wasn’t a master contortionist.
No, what you meant is you were bombarded by images of Kise. Magazine cutouts, selfies, candid shots-pictures upon pictures had been plastered on the inside of your locker.
Along with signs declaring, “_____-CCHI AND KISE LOVE LOVE FOREVER!!!” on long, rolling banners that slid out onto the floor. The sheer sparkle and glitter bombarded your eyes.
None of this prepared you, however for the sight that was to greet you that afternoon-namely, one Kise Ryouta, decked out in a suit that was printed with images of your face and phrases of “_____-cchi’s property”.
“I made us matching couple shirts, _____-cchi!!” Kise cheered, ignoring the flabbergasted looks that were coming from all corners of the gym. “Now, there’s no question as to just who you belong to~”
You could only sigh as Kise engulfed you in a hug, before tugging a sweatshirt over your head that was, indeed…plastered with pictures of your blonde-haired boyfriend in the most ostentatious way of marking you as his.
Murasakibara
Imagine having a koala clinging to you for entire days on end. While the thought may sound cute and adorable, imagine if that koala was actually a 6 foot tall, purple-haired, basketball player who could easily crush you at any moment.
“Atsushi, what are you even doing here?”
“Aka-chin told me to come.”
A complete lie. You knew that the Rakuzan basketball captain had not asked Murasakibara to come visit you, because that same captain was staring at the both of you with a light simmering of impatience and rage.
“Atsushi, Sei-chan looks like he’s going to kill us both.”
Blinking, Murasakibara looked up at you, then at Akashi. “I’ll crush him if he does.”
“What’s this really about, Atsushi?” You muse, running your fingers through his long, purple locks. The strands were soft and well conditioned, ever since you had mentioned to the purple-haired titan that you liked his hair long, even more so when he drew it up into a ponytail during his games when things got really serious. His head was currently resting on your lap, like a sunbathing panther enjoying its rest.
If you looked closely enough, you swore you could see ears popping up on his head and a long tail, swishing back and forth in contentment.
“I wanted to see _____-chin.”
“Well, do you really have to do it from this position?” You were carefully balancing your clipboard in your hands, trying not to accidentally hit your boyfriend in the face. “We can always hang out after practice…”
“No.”
“Atsushi. Seriously.”
“…Muro-chin told me that you got confessions.”
You blinked, suddenly connecting the pieces together. You had wondered why Himuro had texted you the day before, apologizing in advance for something. “What? They’re not being serious, Atsushi.”
“There’s people at my school who keep talking about you.” Murasakibara mutters, his mouth forming into a pout. “I wanted to crush them all, but Muro-chin said that I couldn’t see you if I was in prison.”
“That’s true. And sweet, but really, your goal should to just not be in prison.”
Murasakibara is more than content to just ignore your words, turning his body so his arms could loop around your waist, his large hands pulling you closer as he nuzzles into your stomach. The cute sight is almost just enough to distract you from the fact that you were still in the middle of a basketball practice, and this public display of affection was definitely not what you were expecting at all.
You had to pull out your trump card.
Setting down your clipboard, you gently grasp Murasakibara’s cheeks, leaning down and kissing him soundly on the lips. “Atsushi. I love you, and only you.” You murmur. “And if you let me finish this practice, I’ll let you eat cake from your favorite place later tonight.”
Murasakibara’s eyes blink wide open as he looks up at you. “Promise?” He replies, rising from his supine position to look at you directly, his hand curling around the back of your head as he pulls you in for another kiss.
“Promise.”
---
Masterpost
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Text
i want your last name
summary: it’s only a year...
word count: 16k+ (holy crap i’m sorry)
warnings: idiot-strangers to lovers, suggestive moments (not 18+ but be mindful), frightening situations & suspense, alcohol consumption and drunkenness, language, innuendo, timeline inaccuracies
a/n: please bear with me as this is my first time writing rog and i’m relatively unsure about it. anyway, have a vaguely spooky fic just in time for halloween! xoxo! also: big thank you to @ineloqueent​ for helping with this fic! y’all, she literally held my hand and walked me through every paragraph what a saint
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january, 1982.
“you’re off your rocker if you think i’m going to go through with this, jim.”
from his place on the couch, john snorts. “what? afraid she won’t be pretty enough for you, rog?”
roger levels john an uncharacteristically dark look, jabbing his finger through the air like a knight brandishing his sword or a cowboy his gun. “watch your mouth, deacon.” john holds his hands upwards in surrender, and roger returns his piercing gaze to jim. “i’m not getting married. that’s absolutely out of the question.”
long-suffering band manger and unofficial rockstar wrangler, jim beach drops his face to his hands with a harsh groan. roger cringes in his seat, shifting uncomfortably. he knows what this is about; they all know what this is about.
the end-of-tour party in montreal.
god, he’d gotten so wasted. even now, two months later, he can barely remember that night.
brian, ever the diplomatic, is the first to break the tense silence. he leans forward from his place on the couch beside john and offers roger his most sympathetic look. it does nothing to ease the growing knot of dread in roger’s stomach. “maybe we should leave you and jim to talk, rog.”
jim lifts his head. “i think that might be best, yes.”
roger huffs and falls slack against his chair. he drops his head back, and the ceiling turns topsy-turvy. if jim and the rest of management get their way, his life is bound to feel the same: flipped upside down, all that he knows turned on its head.
john squeezes roger’s shoulder as he slides by, a silent expression of solidarity, but it doesn’t feel like much. john’s got a wife, a parcel of kids. he’s happy at home. roger—he’s never been that way, never seen the point in all the domestics. he isn’t about to join the bloody women’s institute just because a little fun upset a few highbrow jackasses who can’t tell a party from a funeral.
the door to jim’s office shuts with a soft click, and roger imagines the lid of his coffin closing with the same resolute noise. he sits up and runs a hand through his hair. from behind his tinted shades, jim stares across the expanse of his desk. he drums his fingers, worrying his lower lip. roger’s nose twitches to the side. jim isn’t playing around. the proposal typed and printed in the manila folder under jim’s hand is serious, deadly so.
roger removes his sunglasses.
“it was just a party, jim.”
there’s a heavy beat of silence. jim blinks once. “roger, you went streaking through a group of nuns and priests.”
roger squeezes his eyes shut against the words, thankful, for once, that he has no memory of the event. “did i?” he lifts a hand to rub the back of his neck. “honestly couldn’t tell you what i did or didn’t do that night.”
“you did.” jim opens the manila folder and reads from a crumbled newspaper article. “queen’s roger taylor bared all this evening after the explosive conclusion to the game tour, filmed before thousands in montreal’s biggest arena. in a rare display of vulnerability, taylor stripped naked and exposed himself in the hotel lobby where queen resided. he stood on a table and beat his chest like a wild gorilla, chanting about the success of the evening’s filmed concert. lookers-on included none other than a group of nuns and priests recently arrived to canada on special assignment from the vatican. john deacon, bassist for queen, could also be seen laughing in the background.”
jim’s hand thumps against the desk as he drops the article, his stare decidedly unimpressed. “do you have anything to say for yourself?”
running his tongue over his teeth, roger hesitates. not his best moment, he would give jim that. but if he remembers anything about that party, it’s that he wasn’t the only sinner present that evening. john had gotten into his fair share of antics; crystal, too. it seems arbitrary that he should be the one singled out for punishment—and with a strange, archaic, probably-unethical punishment at that.
he shrugs, tossing his hands up in defeat. “i’m not going to be able to say what you want me to say. it was just a party. it got a little out of control. that’s all. i’m sorry if i gave the nuns a little show. i’ll—i dunno—write a letter if you want me to.”
jim scoffs. “write a letter if you think it’ll make me feel better—which it won’t—but that’s not the issue here.”
“then what is the issue? and where the hell does marriage come into it? because i’m not seeing the connection.”
jim sighs. his desk chair creaks as he leans back. taking off his glasses, he pinches the bridge of his nose before meeting roger’s eyes again. “this isn’t the first time something like this has happened, rog. remember new orleans?”
roger holds up an accusatory finger. “you were in new orleans too, jim, so you can’t attack me on that front.”
jim leans forward, his glasses between his hands. he runs his finger back and forth across the top of the frames. “i’ll be blunt. some other people in the office think you’re becoming too—how shall i say it?—explicit for the band. you’re not twenty any more, and raucous parties don’t fit queen’s image. they’re concerned that if more incidents like this hit the press, there will be a drop in sales or concert attendance because nice, suburban families don’t want to go to a concert with a drummer who flashes nuns. do you get what i’m saying?”
roger itches his temple and pushes against the sudden pain behind his left eye. “yeah. yeah, i do.”
“the marriage thing—that was barnaby potter’s idea. if you have beef with it, take it up with him.”
it’s roger’s turn to scoff. he throws his head back on the sound and curls his hands against the cool wooden arms of his chair. when he looks back at jim, he is surprised to see the older man rifling through a filing cabinet in the corner, his back turned.
roger surges forward with his ire anyway. “of course i have beef with it! slap my ass and scold me, sure, but hitch me to a woman i don’t even know for publicity? you’ve got to be joking.”
“personally, i think it’s an idea that will work if you give it a chance.” jim returns to chair and hands roger a sealed packet. “we’ve already got it all lined up, picked the lass and everything. it’s just for a year or so, until the tabloids calm down. then you can get divorced and go your separate ways.”
“wait, hold on—you picked her? without telling me? before even approaching me with the idea?”
“roger—” jim’s tone borders on a warning, but roger ignores his better judgement and cuts the other man off.
“you won’t even give me the option to choose the woman i have to shack up with? god, jim, i’m getting fuckin’ railroaded here!”
jim clenches his jaw. “i’m sure it feels that way, and i’m sorry for that. but it’s this—well, to be frank, it’s this or you’re out. the montreal party was the straw that broke the proverbial camel’s back.”
roger can’t be sure but he thinks he sees red. never in his life has he so badly wanted to wring someone’s neck. it takes every fiber of his being, every molecule in his body, to keep from lunging across the room and tackling jim to the floor. he bites his tongue hard enough to draw a thin line of blood. it coats his mouth in a metallic taste, but it’s nothing compared to the rage boiling in his stomach.
still, he knows what his answer must be. it’s this—a sham marriage, a year of hell—or losing the life he’s worked so hard to build.
he rips the envelope from jim’s hand as roughly as he can when he stands from his chair. he hopes he gave the man a papercut.
“i’ll do it, you bastard,” he mutters. “but i damn well won’t be happy about it.”
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“you look beautiful, [y/n].”
with a playful roll of your eyes, you offer ivy a smile. “thanks, love, but you and i both know this is just part of the job.”
ivy laughs and steps closer to adjust the puffed sleeves of your dress. “it might be a job, but damn, if it isn’t a comfortable one. i just about fell out of my seat when you told me you were quitting the agency to marry roger fucking taylor.”
you slide ivy a bemused smirk in the reflection of the long, oval mirror before you. “we’re not really getting married, ivy. you know that, right?”
ivy frowns and jabs her thumb over her shoulder, confusion awash on her round face. “unless i’m mistaken, we’re at a church, you’re in a wedding dress, roger taylor is the groom, and there’s a priest waiting for you right outside. did you read the memo wrong or something? feels like a wedding to me.”
sighing, you turn away from the mirror and reach for your bouquet of flowers. the white roses interspersed with springs of green leaves smell sweet, their stems tied together with a long white ribbon. you adjust one of the wayward petals then sit on the edge of a cushioned chair to slip on your heels. ivy leans against the door, her arms crossed over her chest.
“are you happy?” she asks, her voice soft.
you look up and pause. the heel of your white mary janes squeezes around your achilles’ tendon, and you wince as you shove your foot into the shoe. “what do you mean—am i happy?”
“i dunno.” ivy shrugs. she picks at an invisible piece of lint on the shoulder of her blue bridesmaid gown. “when we were kids, you always used to talk about your wedding day. now it’s here and—”
“ivy.” you rise from the chair and cross the floor to grab her arm. when you speak, you keep your tone firm and stare into her wide, brown eyes. “i’m doing this for the money and nothing else. it’s not a big deal. i don’t even consider today my wedding day. when roger and i get divorced i’ll find some other chap and make my childhood dreams come true, but that’s not today, and i’m okay with it. so yes, i am happy. this is what i want.”
ivy doesn’t appear convinced what with the way she continues to gnaw at her lower lip and shift her concerned look about your face. but she relents when someone knocks on the door, moving to allow you to grab the doorknob.
“wait, [y/n].” you turn at the door, eyebrows lifted in expectation. “how much are you getting paid?”
you press your pointer finger to your lips. “handsomely,” you whisper, dipping your head as though you are about to spill a secret. ivy leans in. her eyes sparkle with interest, and you inwardly smirk. she’s always been a sucker for drama and intrigue, your cousin. “but,” you continue. “that’s for me to know and you not to know.”
before ivy can respond, you pull open the door to see none other than your future husband waiting for you in the vestibule of the chapel.
he stands poised to flee the premises. he’s half-turned toward the closed chapel door, his hands worrying before his waist, his gaze hinged on the flurry of life outside the chapel, visible through the windows on either side of the door. you realize he’s fiddling with an unlit cigarette, not merely rubbing his hands together in an external sign of nervousness. you can’t make out whether or not his eyes are wild with fear or anger or some other emotion; the black tint of his sunglasses obscures the majority of his eyes. he’s handsome in his suit, but, then again, he’s roger taylor. you would be surprised to find a time in which he isn’t handsome.
when you clear your throat, his head whips to face you, and his fingers stop fidgeting. “sorry,” he mutters. “i was just—” he rubs a hand across the back of his neck and sighs. “they’re ready for you.”
“okay.” you nod with a smile and hope the gesture will ease whatever consternation plagues him. “i’ll be up in a moment.”
“right.” he nods once.
from behind his shades, you see his eyes trail from the top of your head to the soles of your shoes. it’s not sexual, not lewd; he’s just inspecting you, and you don’t blame him. who are you to him other than the model pulled out of a catalog, prepared and willing to be his wife until his time served is complete? you’ve spoken only once before this moment, and that phone-call was terse at best. roger made it perfectly clear his opinions on the arrangement, and he wanted to be sure—no, he needed to be sure—you understood his feelings on the matter. you assured him you had heard him loud and clear; your ear had rung for the next hour if only to remind you of his extreme distaste.
“roger,” you say, pulling his attention back from wherever his mind has drifted off to, his stare gone vacant but hardly serene.
his eyelashes flutter as he struggles to focus. “hm?”
“i said i’ll be up in a moment. you can go in now.”
he nods again, this time his chin smacking his collarbone in his urgency. he rubs his jaw, mutters something unintelligible beneath his breath, and turns on his heel, slipping back into the chapel sanctuary with heavy footfalls. your brows rise on your forehead in the wake of his exit. ivy hovers behind your shoulder.
“that’s him?” she squeaks. “that’s roger taylor?”
“yes.” your mouth twists in pity. “poor dear. he really doesn’t want this.” after waiting the appropriate amount of time to be sure roger has made his way to the front of the church, you step towards the entryway, but not before you can ask ivy one last question. “do i look okay? the pictures taken today are bound to be published in the papers.”
ivy chuckles and shakes her head as she lightly pushes your shoulder. “you look gorgeous and you know it. now go get married to a rockstar, you lucky bitch.”
the actual wedding ceremony itself is a formality. truly, it cannot be called a ceremony. there’s no wedding march, no attendees gently dabbing their tear-filled eyes, no heartfelt vows or kiss to signal the joining of two souls. instead, there’s you and there’s roger and there’s a red-faced, balding priest who points to the solid lines on which you must affix your signature to make the marriage certificate valid. roger signs first, and his knuckles are white against the ballpoint pen. you sign second, and the pen feels overly-warm against your cool palms. the priest blesses you with a sign of the cross and promises the certificate will be notarized and sent to your home address within the week.
then it’s done. you’re married. you feel largely the same as you did this morning. if it weren’t for the giant rock on your ring finger and the recent transfer of seventy-five-thousand pounds into your bank account, you might wonder if this was all a product of your over-active imagination, run away with a plot stolen from a b-list film.
the most vital part of the day, the reason you’re here and dressed in a gown with your hair crimped and nails painted, comes right after the priest scurries away to tend to his more important duties. jim beach stands from his place in one of the pews and ushers a photographer forward. he points between you and roger.
“all right, get snug, you two.” jim chews on a large wad of gum, and his words are slurred with an excess of saliva. “just a few pictures and then we’ll go eat. we all know that’s the only reason john showed up today.”
lounged against a pew, john raises his finger in agreement, and his wife elbows him in the chest. he sputters, doubling over in pain, while freddie laughs in amusement. beside you, roger watches the interaction with a back as straight as the pew benches, his jaw tight. you push your arm around his elbow and tug lightly. he inhales before turning to meet your eyes.
“what?” his voice is not cruel or unkind; it’s just tired.
“try and look happy, yeah?” you say, offering him a gentle smile similar to the one you’d given him in the vestibule. it’s the only thing you have to give him other than your hand in marriage and a chance to salvage his reputation; yet, again, it does not alleviate the tension pinching his brow. “the faster we smile the faster we can eat.”
roger shifts, as though he wants to pull away from you, but knows he shouldn’t. his feet dance back and forth on the carpeted stairs leading to the sanctuary state. “i should be telling you to try and look happy. this is just as much an inconvenience for you.”
you shake your head with a chuckle. “hardly. i make my living pretending to be happy, or moody, or sultry. whatever the director wants. i’m a pro at this. and besides,” you add. “it’s my job to make you look good. though, to be honest, that’s not very hard. you look good all on your own.”
roger sniffs and rubs the underside of his nose. he ignores your compliment and keeps his eyes trained on the photographer setting up his equipment at the base of the stairs. “maybe i could use some tips…”
he’s being glib but you take the opportunity to try and break the ice—the rock solid, absolutely frigid, polar ice-cap style ice—between you both. holding up a finger to the photographer, you slide to stand in front of roger. he’s taller than you, not by much, but enough that you have to tilt your head slightly to maintain eye-contact. his blue eyes very much resemble the ice with which he’s surrounded himself. you can feel the chill on his shoulders, even as you smooth the wrinkles on his tailored dress-shirt.
“whenever i have to fake a smile,” you say, adjusting his thin tie. “i always think about the thing that makes me happiest.” he doesn’t ask you to expand, but you do anyway. “for me, it’s when my cousin ivy moved in with my mother and me. i was seven and she was six and it’s been one giant slumber party ever since.”
“is that your cousin?” roger’s eyes flick to the girl sitting across the aisle from the band and management. ivy has her hands beneath her thighs, her head dipped, her dark black hair covering a curtain over her face.
you nod. “mhmm.”
“she doesn’t look like you.”
you lift an eyebrow. “she’s adopted.”
“right, sorry.” roger exhales deeply, and the weight of the world slips from one of his shoulders to the other, tilting his body in a stiff hunch. “i’m feeling out of sorts today, as you can probably imagine.”
“just think about what makes you happy, roger.” you dare to lift a hand and press it against his cheek. his skin is smooth beneath your fingers. he must have shaved his morning. he looks boyish up close, and you wonder if, like you, he had ever dreamt of what his wedding day might look like. you wonder if, like you, he had given up those dreams to make today a reality.
the photographer takes a picture of your hand against roger’s cheek, and the sudden flash of light has you blinking in surprise. you look over your shoulder, mouth slightly parted and eyelashes fluttering to clear the white spots over your vision.
the photographer just shrugs. “ready now?”
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the shrill of a ringing telephone wakes you the morning after the wedding, and you groan, pulled from a heavy slumber by the incessant and high-pitched tone. there’s a dull ache at the base of your skull, and your tongue feels like it’s coated with a fine layer of sand. beside you, a man snores softly, his face pink and eyelashes soft on his cheekbones.
oh yes, that’s right. you’re married to roger taylor, aren’t you? you’d drunk so much at the celebration supper that you’d nearly forgotten. the evening itself is but a hazy memory, but you think you recall freddie imitating a russian style jig atop a table, and phoebe going into great detail about all the fabulous dress-up parties you’ll be expected to attend now.
one thing you can’t remember is how you ended up in roger’s bed, dressed in one of his oversized t-shirts. your hair is still stiff with sticky hairspray, your legs still encased in a pair of nylon tights, and you don’t feel… sated, for lack of a better word. it’s probably safe to assume that you did not sleep with roger; you merely slept beside him. why you didn’t take up residence in his guest room will be the first question out of your mouth once his day starts. 
you might be his wife and he might be your husband, but you don’t want him getting any funny ideas about the nature of your relationship.
this is a job for you. nothing more.
the phone continues ringing and, lest roger wake before he is ready, you move to reach across him for the phone on his bedside table. you speak into the receiver on a whisper, adjusting your fist on the mattress to keep from falling flat on roger’s stomach.
“hello?”
“uh—hi.” there’s a pause, as if the speaker is uncertain how to react to your voice on roger’s line. “is this [y/n]?”
“yes. who is this?”
“it’s brian. we met yesterday.”
you bite your lip to keep from laughing. “yes, i know who you are, brian.”
he chuckles softly. “sorry—i can’t remember much of last evening. it’s probably best i make a second introduction if i can’t recall the first.”
“well then, i’m [y/n] [y/l/n]. [y/n] taylor now, i suppose. pleased to meet you.”
“brian may. the pleasure is all mine. ours, really—me and the guys. what you’re doing is—we appreciate it, truly. you’ve saved the band, in a way.”
“that’s kind of you, brian.” you glance at roger out of the corner of your eye. he hasn’t moved a muscle, and his face is the most serene you’ve ever seen it. saved the band? you doubt it. smoothed a few ruffled feathers? that’s certainly more likely. “it’s no trouble, though. it’s just my job. what was it you called for?”
“roger was supposed to be at the studio an hour ago. we have a recording session today.”
“shit, really?” pressing the receiver to your shoulder, you twist your wrist upwards, but find your watch missing. you scan the unfamiliar room. a digital clock glows red on a built-in bookshelf. “is it really nearly one o’clock?!”
“afraid so.”
“shit, i’m sorry. i only just woke up. yesterday was hectic—to say the very least. i’ll have roger out the door in half an hour.”
“thanks, [y/n]. you’ll find this happens a lot after a night out. but, hey, at least you’re not shouting at me like rog does.”
after passing pleasantries a moment more—brian asks you about ivy, who you are surprised he remembers, and you ask him about his stargazing habits—you reassure brian that roger will be on his way as soon as possible. you drop the receiver on its base with more force than necessary, but the crack of plastic on plastic and the slight ring of the internal bell gets roger moving.
he grunts, twisting his head away from the noise.
you shake his shoulder gently. “wakey wakey, sleeping beauty. the day is already half gone.”
roger yawns as his eyes blink open. he rubs a hand down his face and arches his back like a cat as he stretches. slumping back against his pillows, he stares at you for a moment, his eyes roaming your face.
“are you an angel?”
you laugh at this, and he winces, holding the heel of his hand to his forehead. “no. i’m your wife. are you still drunk?”
“maybe a little.” his eyelashes flutter rapidly as he adjusts to the sunlight streaming through the bedroom window. he waves his hand around your head, and you lean back slightly, away from the exposed skin of his chest and striking collarbones. “you look like an angel with the sun all around your head. ‘s like a halo.”
“that’s kind of you.”
he shrugs, shaking his head. “just sayin’.”
“i think you’re still drunk.”
as if to prove your point, he hiccups then falls to his side on the bed. “maybe.” his cheek is pressed firmly against the mattress, smushing half of his face flat. soft, steady breaths filter in and out of his parted lips, and his eyelids begin to grow heavy as he is dragged back to his dream world. he looks more tired child than grown man, but the sight is endearing. still, your current job is getting him out the door and on his way to the studio. you can’t let him be any later than he already is.
“oh no, you don’t.” grabbing his arm, you pull as you slide from the bed. roger resists your strength and moves to push his entire face against the mattress. he mumbles something against the sheets, but you can’t make out the words. “brian already called. you’re late, pretty boy.”
roger rolls over onto his back, and the movement causes you to lose your grip on his wrist. you stumble backwards then plant your hands on your hips.
“come on, roger. you’ve got to get up.”
“i don’t want to. yesterday was shit, and all i want to do is stay in bed.”
with a sigh, you gather your wedding dress from its heap on the floor. you lay it over your forearm and pull open the closet door. “nice to know you thought our wedding day was shit,” you say. 
you mean it only as a joke, but roger sits up fast, swaying slightly with the movement. he catches your eye as you exit the walk-in closet, and you pause, turning the light off slowly, held by his angry stare.
“fuck off,” he says. “i don’t want this. i don’t want you.”
to say his words don’t sting would be a falsehood. no one wants to hear such a thing, least of all from their spouse. the words make your heart clench painfully in your chest, and you wonder what he sees when he looks at you. he doesn’t look at you, though; he cradles his forehead in his hands, his back hunched where he sits on the edge of the bed.
inhaling deeply, you reach up and begin to remove some of the pins lost in your hair. you head for the bedroom door. “well, while you sit and sulk, i’ll pack you a lunch. you’d better shower, though. you reek.”
from your place puttering about the kitchen, you hear the shower start up a few moments later. good—at least he’s moving. you haven’t the foggiest idea where anything is in his kitchen, but you make do with what you can find in the poorly stocked fridge, and pack him a light lunch. you start a pot of coffee, too, and lean against the counter as you wait for the pot to fill.
the ancient coffee pot takes too long, and you can hear roger humming in the shower down the hall. 
your nails tap against the counter. 
you’re antsy, unsure of what to do with yourself now that the wedding is over. how do you be a wife to someone who doesn’t want a wife? how do you be a friend to someone who doesn’t want a friend?
it’s too big of a problem to solve in the span of time it takes for roger to finish his shower, so you slip into the bedroom and peel off your stockings and his tee-shirt. you put on a sweater, some jeans, and wipe the day-old makeup from your face with a wet-wipe. the movements are tried and true, and they calm your racing thoughts. 
you have an entire year to figure out how to live with roger taylor. you don’t need to have it all figured out this morning.
the coffee pot dings, its job complete, just as you and roger both enter the kitchen.
but he hesitates before taking another step, and so do you. 
his hair is wet from the shower. a white sweatshirt swallows his torso. part of the hem is tucked into his white-washed jeans, and you’re struck by the narrowness of his hips. the weariness is gone from his face, replaced with a youthful sort of glow and stubborn cheekiness. you aren’t sure how he’s managed it, but he looks well-rested. 
you lift a hand to your cheek. you must look a state. it takes a lot longer for you to put yourself back together after a night out.
he stares at you for a moment, then shakes his head and crosses the kitchen to fill a travel mug with hot coffee. gnawing on your lower lip, you lean your hip bones against the kitchen island as he putters about the room, quiet as the grave.
it’s only your first day as husband and wife, and under such unique circumstances, you shouldn’t expect him to—what? make conversation? ask about you and your life?
“so… what do you think you’ll work on today? in the studio, i mean.”
he glances over his shoulder then shrugs. “not sure. probably something related to the rest of the tour.” bending at the waist, he pulls a drawer out from beneath the sink. his ass looks good in those jeans, but you doubt he’d like you staring, so you look away, mouth screwed to the side. “do you know where the sugar packets are?”
you frown and push away from the island, rounding it to stand beside him. “no?” he turns at the sound of your confused voice, and his head jolts backward to see you standing so close. “i don’t live here, remember?”
“well, you do now.” he swivels on his heel and pulls a small white jar across the counter. lifting the lid, he sighs. “i can’t find the sugar.”
“actually, about living here now...” you follow as he starts for the door, grabbing his keys from a small table in the foyer. “the bedroom situation? i figured we’d have separate bedrooms but last night—”
roger opens the front door and silences you with a hard stare. “the only other bedroom is my practice room.”
your shoulders slump. “oh.”
“i wasn’t going to make it a guest room if you’ll be gone in a year.”
“but where will i—”
“fuck it all, [y/n].” he curls his hand around the doorframe, hanging his head. a cold winter breeze sweeps through the hall, and you pull your jumper tight around your waist. “just sleep in my bed, okay? i don’t fuckin’ care.”
you swallow hard, nod. you’d been prepared for some measure of hostility, some measure of resentment. what you hadn’t been prepared for is the way his rebuffs settle like dead weight in your stomach. he alone can be blamed for this; it was his actions that drove management to force you upon him. yet, he seems to look at you with nothing more than dread and disgust. perhaps it is because you are the physical embodiment of his wrongdoing. his antics created you, and he is powerless to wipe you from his eyesight as he might a clump of dirt. you are a permanent stain—at least for the next year.
maybe you can’t begrudge him his disdainful attitude, then.
you come to when a car horn blares outside. 
roger is gone, the door open, void of his claustrophobic presence. leaning around the frame, you catch sight of him and his blond hair as he reaches his car parked on the side of the road. spinning on your heel, you grab his sacked lunch from the fridge and race after him.
“roger!”
he looks up from his car door, and you can’t help but note the way his shoulders lift, tensing at the sight of you running barefoot down the sidewalk. the winter air quickens your steps, and you’re out of breath and huffing when you reach his side. white plumes escape your mouth and drift towards the gray sky.
“you forgot this,” you say, pushing the brown paper sack against his chest. you curl your toes against the frigid bricks beneath your feet.
his brow pinches. “what is it?”
“a lunch. you haven’t eaten yet.”
for the first time since meeting him, the ghost of a true smile lifts the corners of his mouth as he stares down at the sacked lunch. he lifts a hand, and you are surprised by its warmth when he covers your knuckles with his palm. his eyes flick upwards, meeting yours.
“thanks, [y/n].” he tilts his head to the side. “i’m sorry i’ve been a prick. this is all… really new for me.”
you slip your hand from his grasp, sure that your smile is somewhere between girlish and shy. a sharp wind whips through the stitching of your sweater, and you shiver.   
“we’ll figure it out,” you say, and it’s a message to both him and yourself. you will figure this out.
“yeah.” he slides his key into the slot on the car door. “yeah, we will.”
“oh. rog, wait.” you stop him by putting a hand on his shoulder. when he twists at the waist, you wind your arms around his neck before he has time to react. you squeeze tight, your toes skimming the ground. he feels firm, stiff like a board. “hug me back,” you whisper against his ear. “there’s someone across the street taking photos.”
the sound he makes in your ear—a grumble, a low growl—sends your blood pumping into overdrive. he’s angry, but he dutifully embraces you as any newlywed husband might. his arms are strong around your lower back, and you melt into him.
god, he feels good. you can’t remember the last time you were held like this. he smells like the soap from his shower, and his sweatshirt is soft. his hair brushes against your cheek, and your eyelashes flutter in response. you should pull away; you’ve hugged him long enough to appear the besotted wife, desperate for her husband to stay home the day after their wedding. the paparazzi surely got what they wanted.
so, why is it so hard for you to let go?
you shake yourself free of the feeling, whether it be longing or desire or something else entirely.
sliding your hands across roger’s shoulders, you drop from your raised stance. you press a kiss to the corner of his mouth, quick and without hesitation. just in case.
“go on.” you hurry to step back, to allow him the space the leave. “you don’t want to keep the boys waiting any longer.”
roger’s eyes linger a moment more, his stare somewhere between searching and assessing. then he mumbles an oath beneath his breath, wrenches open his car door, and slips inside. the door slams behind him, and the engine roars to life. you retreat further at the sound, wrapping your arms around your stomach when the car tires squeal against gravel in his haste to get away.
some blissfully wed husband he makes.
biting the inside of your lip, you turn back to the house. the front door remains open wide, and it’s likely the heat has long since left the warmth of the halls. you pause long enough to lift the paper from the front stoop. what you see beneath the fold makes you hesitate all the longer.
there’s a photo of you and roger on the left side of the page beneath the headline, roger taylor marries model. the grainy, black and white image of your wedding day presents you, the smiling bride, and roger, the smiling husband, joined hand-in-hand beneath a heavy wooden cross. to the untrained eye, all is joy in the taylor household. the article describes the ceremony, though the details are patchy and entirely false, as intimate and “drenched with love.”
you scoff before you can stop yourself. clearly, the author of the article has encountered roger taylor under duress.
but it’s not the article which holds you frozen to the front stoop, your exposed toes and fingers sticking like icicles to the newspaper. rather, it’s the smear of red paint slashed over your picture. it’s the word slag scrawled over the article, an arrow pointed in the direction of the wedding photo.
still, in a one-on-one meeting you’d had with jim beach prior to the wedding, he’d warned you of something like this. though all four queen members are undeniably attractive, it is roger who makes the fans go gaga.
maybe it’s his boyish good looks contrasted with his raspy voice. maybe it’s the frenzy with which he plays, his easy charm and sunkissed skin. whatever it is—roger’s fans are a possessive lot.
jim had told you to prepared for a few nasty letters or scathing criticism in the papers. he had told you it wouldn’t last long, just until the initial shock of the marriage wore off, just until roger’s fans accepted the reality that they were not be his lawfully wedded wife.
so, truly, the first incident does not scare you. you just hadn’t realized the scrutiny would begin so soon. if anything, the painted paper makes you chuckle. roger’s fans certainly don’t like to waste time.
you toss the paper in the bin beside the stoop, and it’s forgotten before the day is over.
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a week bleeds into a month, and you find yourself falling into some semblance of a life with roger.
you cohabitate for the most part. he does not outright rebuff your attempts at friendship, nor does he accept any olive branch you extend.
conversation is stilted, his contributions terse and monosyllabic. he prefers your home-cooked meals be eaten before the television, and not at the dinner table, where he would be forced to engage with you. he doesn’t even give in when you ask if there’s anything he’d like to rant about. he just shakes his head and bangs on his drums well into the evening, despite having banged on them the whole day at the studio.
yet he sleeps beside you, allows you to sleep beside him.
without fail, he appears more at ease come nightfall. he sheds whatever protective shell he wears throughout the day in favor of something softer, something more tender. you’re not sure what changes him when he walks over the threshold of the bedroom, but something does. perhaps it’s the soft lamplight or the hum of the fan he insists be kept on despite the chill of winter.
there’s a part of you that wonders if it might be your very presence that softens him, but you’ve taken to silencing that part as of late. he’s long-since proven that you hold no sway over him whatsoever, and that’s okay. your job is to be a buffer between his antics and the all-seeing eyes of the public. nothing more.
two months to the day after your wedding, you’re stood in the hallway, slipping on a pair of earrings, and brushing away roger’s hurried attempts to get you through the door. he has one hand on the doorknob, the other wrist tilted to expose his watch face.
“[y/n], please!”
“roger, the party doesn’t start until queen arrives. give me just a minute more.”
tonight, the savoy hotel, the first music industry party you’ll attend by roger’s side as his wife.
you’re nervous.
your hands shake as you press the earrings into your ears, and you rub your lips back and forth, feeling the slick lipstick rub over the flesh. you’re thankful the dress you chose is a gauzy sort of chiffon. if you sweat, no one will be able to tell, thanks to the pale blue of the fabric.
impatient as ever, roger drags himself from the door to stand behind you, as though prepared to throw you over his shoulder. however, a smirk pulls at your mouth when he pauses in his frustration long enough to primp and preen his hair in the mirror. you catch his eye, your fingers paused in snapping your clutch closed. he sees your smirk, and his own lips pull on a wry smile.
the moment hangs in the air, thick with—what? tension? no. something else. camaraderie comes to mind.
your eyes remain locked with his, and his grin spreads until he is shaking his head with amusement. he pushes your shoulder, but the touch is friendly, almost brotherly in nature.
“come on,” he says. “i don’t want to miss all the good wine.”
nodding, you start for the door, trailing behind him to flick the lights off. darkness engulfs the house, the only light the white glow of the moon spilling through the window above the kitchen sink and a night light plugged in along the hallway baseboard.
but then the phone rings.
roger stamps his foot against the floor, the door already half-open. “fuckin’ hell!”
“let me get it.” you’re halfway down the hall before he can stop you. “i’ll tell them to buzz off. hold on!”
“i’m going to get the car started,” he says. his voice echoes through the hall to meet you where the phone hangs in the kitchen. “you have two minutes, [y/n]. two minutes!”
lifting the phone from the receiver, you press it against your ear. “hello?”
at first, you hear nothing on the other end.
but you’re sure you heard the phone ring, so you lean closer to the receiver and plug your opposite ear in a piss poor attempt to hear better. “hello? this is [y/n] taylor speaking.”
the sound of heavy breathing—deep inhales, hard exhales—meets your ear. deep inhale, hard exhale. over and over and over.
your throat tightens, but you push past the lump. “hello? who’s there?”
a stuttering of breath on the inhale, a shaky exhale. a croak, voice poised to speak.
only you slam the phone back on the receiver before the person on the other end can say a word.
for a moment, you stand still, eyes glued to the phone, mouth parted in shock.
but then roger honks the car horn, and you shake yourself free of the unsettling feeling. a missed connection, you tell yourself. a wrong number. a mistake. that’s all it was—a mistake.
still, you are shaking when you slide into the passenger seat of roger’s car. he glances at you before pulling into the busy street.
“are you cold?” he asks. he turns the heat up, blasting the air against your face. “you’re shaking.”
“no,” you say, and, truly, you aren’t. he loaned you an ostentatious fur coat for the occasion, lined with a smooth brown fabric, and you are comfortably warm beneath the heavy material. “just nervous.”
roger snorts, his eyes sliding to you. “nervous? surely you’ve been to parties before. you’re a model, for god’s sake.”
“i’m not sure what kind of model you think i was, rog. i did mostly print, never runway. parties were never a part of my nine-to-five.”
“oh.” his mouth screws to the side. “i guess—well, to be honest, i kinda thought models all did the same kind of work.”
“most people do. that’s in the past now, though.” you shift, glance out the window, and watch the streetlights blur in a hazy streak of orange and yellow. he’s driving fast, and you grip the side of the door, willing your heart to stop racing.
the car slows to a stop beneath a red light. roger taps his fingers on the steering wheel, and the silence in the car is deafening.
you should strike up a conversation. he seems willing tonight, and maybe that’s due to the cramped nature of the car, but it’s an opportunity nonetheless.
only you can’t stop thinking about the phone call, about the heavy breathing and the unanswered questions. you shut your eyes and find yourself mirroring the caller’s breathing patterns.
deep inhale, hard exhale.
“so, you’re done with modeling?”
you open your eyes and turn to look at his profile. why he insists on wearing sunglasses in the dead of night you will never understand, but the sight alone makes you smirk. he knows he’s attractive; you have to give him credit for embracing it.
“that’s why i married you,” you say.
roger laughs—and you realize it’s probably the first time you’ve heard the sound. his laugh aligns with the light timbre of his voice, and the anxiety in your chest eases to hear him sound something other than malcontent.
“i knew you were a gold digger!” it’s a joke—you can tell by the quirk of his mouth and the lines around his eyes—but you rush to defend yourself all the same.
“no, i’m not!” you hesitate before shrugging with a rueful chuckle. “well… maybe a little. i won’t deny that the money i get from this arrangement really helps. i was looking for a way out of modeling, anyway.”
“really?” roger’s eyebrow arches, and, as the car turns into the savoy, the wrap-around drive clogged with limousines, sport cars, and photographers jostling for a good spot, you catch a glimpse of admiration on his face. “what do you want to do now?”
“i’m not sure. go back to school. i’ve got a head for maths, so maybe accounting or something.”
roger twists his head to meet your eyes, and his smile is earnest. it steals the breath from your lungs.
deep inhale, hard exhale.
“you don’t strike me as an accountant, dove.”
“why not?”
“accountants are stuffy, greasy men. you’re… you know…” he waves a hand, inches the car forward as the line moves. camera bulbs flash in the world outside, but within the car, all you can focus on is roger and his next words.
“i’m…?” you’re fishing, but this is the first time he’s given you more than the time of day, and you’re eager to get something, anything, out of your husband.
he shrugs, and his hands curl around the steering wheel. a muscle in his jaw ticks. “you’re too nice.”
you look away. “ah—nice.” not what you’d been expecting him to say.
he pulls the car to a stop along the hotel’s entrance, and a sharply dressed attendant opens the door. sliding out after roger, you instinctively reach for his hand. he spares you a short glance and squeezes your fingers together in a gesture of encouragement.
a black—not red—carpet lines the walkway from the drive to the open hotel doors. velvet ropes hold back the crowd of photographers, reporters, and fans lucky enough to have squeezed their way to such a prime viewing spot. camera flashes paint the inside of your eyelids with bright, white spots. despite the chill of winter, the air is hot, heady with glitz and glamor. it’s hard to distinguish any one voice over the plethora of people vying for attention, and your head swims in the chaos of it all.
roger moves easily from one side of the rope to another. he is in his element, grinning for the cameras and joking with reporters who grab him long enough for a quote. his moments with the press are short, few and far between. he much prefers the fans—their simpering smiles, tear-stained cheeks, and waving slips of paper begging for a signature. you don’t blame him. who could ever resist such unfettered adoration?
near the end of the carpet, a reporter snags roger’s attention with his waving arm. palm still clasped in roger’s, you trail behind your husband, hovering just behind his shoulder. the cool smile you perfected in your modeling days remains fixed on your face, even as the reporter acknowledges you with a tilt of his head.
“is this your wife, roger?”
the reporter has to shout to be heard over the sudden surge of excitement as a new celebrity takes their first step on the carpet. it’s kate bush, if you aren’t mistaken. you could be wrong, though. the reporter’s query pricks your ears, dividing your focus between the cacophony around you and the question at hand. thus far, you’ve remained nameless by roger’s side. no one—fan or press alike—has asked after you, and you’re happy for it.
roger turns to look at you, and his grin spreads. he goes so far as to slip his arm around your waist, tugging you against his side, keeping his gaze on your profile. a sudden rush of blood floods your cheeks, and you duck your head beneath his watchful eyes. yet you find your own smile widening. the action is not one you have to force or fake, though. it’s easy to smile when roger is smiling.
“yes, this is my bride,” roger says. “[y/n].”
the hand he’s placed on your waist squeezes the flesh of your hip, pushing you further against him. to keep from tripping over your own legs, you press a hand against his chest to steady yourself. you can feel his heartbeat beneath your fingers; his heart pulses to a steady rhythm. your own heart beats twice as fast.
the reporter checks something on his small pad of paper. “is it true that you used to be a model, [y/n]? there are rumors that this marriage is a publicity stunt.” he hesitates, glancing over his shoulder as someone bumps his back, pushing him against the velvet rope. once righted, he continues. “there are rumors that you were hired to get the press to stop talking negatively about the montreal incident.”
you open your mouth to speak, but roger jumps in before you can utter a single syllable.
“are you joking?” he tosses his head back in an easy laugh and pulls you even tighter against his side. you’re afraid if he draws you any nearer you will absorb into him completely. but with the way the lights dance off his eyelashes and his hair looks perfectly tousled and his body feels strong against yours, you aren’t sure that would be a bad thing.
“i’m crazy about my wife!” he says, and the words go straight to your heart like a wildfire. “you should get yourself one, mate.” he playfully slaps the reporter’s upper arm. “they’re great fun!”
the reporter arches an eyebrow. “it’s just that i know you’ve gone on record as not exactly believing in marriage and—”
“what do you want me to do? kiss ‘er? would that make you happy?” a shit-eating grin rises on his face, indignant and cocky all at once. he shoots you a look out of the corner of his eye; you bite your lip. “will that get you off my back?”
“that’s not really—”
“here.” he taps the wrist of a bystanding photographer then points to you, twisting his body so that you stand face to face. “put this in your bloody paper!”
grabbing either side of your face, roger dips his head to capture your lips with his. for a moment, you remain unsure. you hold fast to his wrists, your mouth unmoving. the blood in your veins stands frozen in shock, and your heart presses painfully against your ribcage. somewhere in the back of your mind, your conscious screams for you to react, to play along, but it’s not until roger slides one hand from your cheek to the small of your back that you register what part you must play.
thank god it’s not a difficult role.
with a tilt of your head, you wrap your arms around his neck and hold tight. he tastes faintly of cigarettes and the mints he uses to freshen his breath. his lips are soft, softer than you’d anticipated. you can hear the clicking of cameras, feel the blinding light of flashbulbs pierce your eyelids, sense the growing interest in your display of affection, but none of it penetrates the bubble—the bubble of you and roger, of his lips and your lips, of his arms holding you close, his very air becoming yours.
he pulls away entirely too soon, and his smile is all the more cheeky. you press your fingertips to your lips, lower your face, and draw in a sharp breath.
“there! that could enough for you?”
roger steers you away from the reporters and into the sanctuary of the hotel at last. a rush of cool air meets you and, though it is mid-winter, you sweat beneath roger’s fur coat. the gentle whoosh of air-conditioning is a blessing against your hot skin.
as you enter the ballroom transformed for the event, roger lowers his mouth to your ear. “sorry about that, poppet.” the low register of his voice and the feeling of his breath against the back of your neck sends a shiver down your spine. “i’ve dealt with that tosser before, and he really grinds my gears.”
“‘s fine, roger,” you manage to say through your tight throat. “it’s what i’m here for, yeah?”
he stops walking, and his hand moves from your back to your wrist. his eyes drift over your face, calculating, searching. you let him look. you aren’t sure what he’s looking for, but you get the feeling that he’s truly seeing you for the first time. even in the manufactured blue light of the room, even with the myriad of tables surrounded by producers and singers and agents alike, his face visibly softens and his hand curls around your wrist.
“roger! [y/n]! over here!”
three tables away, freddie waves his hand, beckoning you over. roger drags you along, his fingers intertwining with yours as you sidestep people already lounging at their seats. once at the table set aside for queen and guests, roger pulls out your chair, and you sit, smoothing your hands over your skirt. he sits beside you and leans to his side to whisper something to john. on your right sits chrissie may, and you offer her a smile in greeting.
the function—a charity benefit organized to bring awareness to the falklands disagreement—comes and goes without issue. the dinner is bland, but the wine is good. chrissie is pleasant, and it’s your first chance to speak to another band member’s wife since the wedding. you appreciate her advice, laugh at her stories, and enjoy yourself without restraint. it doesn’t hurt that as roger drinks more, he more pays attention to you. you really shouldn’t encourage him, but when he slings an arm around your chair and pulls you closer, when he turns his head to whisper a joke in your ear at brian’s expense, when he plays with a loose lock of your hair, twirling it around his finger, it’s all you can do not to melt like the ice-sculpture in the center of the room.
come the end of the event, you find yourself walking between chrissie and veronica, your steps slow as the boys stumble through the hall. roger and john cannot stop laughing, though no one has said anything remotely funny for the last few minutes. they cling to one another like koalas to trees, as though the other might drop to the ground if released. brian and freddie aren’t any better. they sing off-key, their voices bouncing off the empty walls and laminate floors. you aren’t sure what part of the hotel you’ve wound up in, but it’s certainly less plush than the ballroom. still, you smile when roger slides his sunglasses over his eyes and snorts at one of john’s inane comments.
your smile falters when the sound of veronica’s labored breathing, pregnant as she is, reaches your ears.
deep inhale, hard exhale.
in the flurry of the evening—amidst the kiss and the dinner and the joking and the drinking—you’d forgotten about the phone call.
chrissie reaches out to grab your arm when your steps stutter. “are you okay?” she asks.
you stop walking. if the boys get into trouble around the corner, you’ll surely hear it.
meeting chrissie’s wide eyes, you frown. you hate the put a damper on the evening’s chipper mood, but the memory of the phone call crashes to the surface, bringing with it anxiety and unease. roger doesn’t need to know, but perhaps the other wives experienced a similar phenomenon. perhaps it’s all in your head. either way, you’d like a second opinion.
“this is going to sound weird, but… have either of you ever gotten a strange phone call?”
“phone call?” veronica rubs a hand over her swollen stomach. “what do you mean?”
you explain the events prior to your departure earlier in the evening, and the concerned looks that settle on chrissie and veronica’s faces stir the uncertainty in your stomach.
“that doesn’t sound good, [y/n],” chrissie says.
you gnaw at your lower lip. “no, i suppose it doesn’t.”
“have you told rog?”
you shake your head. “i don’t want to trouble him. not if it’s just some practical joke. it very well could be our kid neighbor having a lark.”
another memory drifts to the surface: the newspaper, the red paint dripping across your photograph. slag, they’d written.
you’d forgotten about that too.
veronica pulls you back to the present with her even tone. “i think you should tell him. if someone is harassing you, even if it’s just the once, don’t you think he should know?”
“i guess but—”
“hey, party people!” john sticks his head around the corner, breaking the conversation with his over-loud voice. “guess what we found?”
“judging by your wet trousers, i’d say a pool.”
john trips down the hall to grab veronica’s arm. “have i ever told you that you’re brilliant?” he presses a noisy kiss to her cheek, and even veronica isn’t capable of remaining firm under such affection.
like a child who has found an interesting twig, john crooks his arm in a follow-me motion, tugging his wife toward the pool. “come on. come see!”
veronica follows john around the corner, but before you can follow, chrissie presses her palm to your shoulder.
“you should tell roger,” she says. “before it gets serious.”
you nod, promise her you will, then make your way to the indoor swimming pool, knowing full well roger won’t hear a word of the incident.
the savoy’s pool room is understated in comparison with the rest of the hotel. though the ceiling stretches high, skylights allowing moonlight to shimmer over the undisturbed water, the room is just as hot, just as stuffy, as any other hotel pool. you drop your coat and rog’s to a plastic lounge chair as soon as you enter, swamped as you are by the thick air.
all nerves, all worries about the phone call, fade away as you slip your shoes off and watch roger and john’s poor poolside rendition of abbott and costello’s “who’s on first” routine. roger can’t keep up with john no matter how hard he tries, but their combined effort is valiant.
laughing, you clap as they take their theatrical bows and only laugh harder when john trips over the edge of the pool mid-bow. he lands belly-first in the clear water, rising a sputtering, drenched mess, his hair and clothes sodden to the bone, though his eyes are bright with mischief. he swims to where veronica sits with her ankles in the water and, before she can sternly admonish him, has her pulled into the churning pool beside him.
brian is next in. he cannonballs in the deep end, and chrissie follows of her own volition. the impact of their jump launches a tidal wave of water in your direction, and you screech, nearly falling in your attempt to avoid getting wet.
but then a pair of arms wrap around your waist, lifting you from the cool, albeit slippery, floor.
“roger, no!” you twist in his tight hold. “no, roger, don’t!”
your voice echoes in the room, bouncing off the windows and walls; yet roger ignores your pleas for release. he shuffles to the edge of the pool at the behest and cheering of his friends, each treading water, watching as you struggle to break free.
the water beneath your feet rises and falls, sloshing this way and that. you can see the bottom of the pool from where roger holds you, and there’s a delicate, inlaid design of a turtle twelve feet down on the pool’s stone foundation.
you curl your nails in roger’s arm. “roger, i can’t—”
he tosses you in before you can finish the sentence.
you fall through the air with a scream, land on your back, and sink beneath the surface of the water. chemically-laced water fills your mouth, your nose, and your lungs scream for air.
for a moment, fear grips you, not unlike the way it gripped you in the hallway of your own home, the phone cradled against your ear. only this time, you know exactly what will happen if you don’t get help.
this is not a battle you can win yourself.
kicking to the top, you break through the water and cough, shaking your head. tears cloud your vision when you open your eyes, but the liquid that’s caught in your eyelashes disguises them, and for that you’re thankful. roger bobs beside you, a grin on his face, looking much too pleased with himself and his antics. without a second thought, you reach for him.
“roger, i can’t swim,” you say.
his face falls. “oh.” he blinks then, realization striking as you grab onto his shoulders. “fuck, [y/n]. i’m sorry.”
clinging to him, you wrap your arms around his chest, your legs around his waist. you rest your cheek against the back of his neck and sigh, inhaling deeply. “i tried to tell you,” you whisper.
beneath the water, his hand curls around the skin of your ankle. he squeezes, and it’s all the apology you need.
the band stays in the pool for entirely too long. freddie starts talking about the next album, and the other boys chime in, clamoring for their opinions to be heard over the others. despite their drunken state, music brings a sense of clarity to their speech and thought. it’s their life’s work and something about which they care deeply. there’s no denying that. even when brian tries his hand at a backwards flip and freddie challenges john to a diving contest, they are always thinking, always working, toward their next goal. you admire them for that.
roger remains steady where he stands. you cling to him like a barnacle, even though you just as easily could remove yourself and find a place where your feet touch solid ground. he feels nice, though. his body is a comfort against yours, and as the business talk continues, your head lolls to the side on his shoulder, a gentle smile on your lips.
you could get used to this.
at some point, veronica complains about her aching back and drags john from the pool. they are the first to leave, but brian and chrissie soon follow. you aren’t sure if you want to go, if you want the evening to end. if it means roger will go back to ignoring you, shoving you aside, you think you could stay in this pool until your skin wilted and dripped off your bones.
“we’d better go, love,” roger whispers.
you know he’s right.
“yeah.” you try to keep the disappointment from your voice.
he moves to the side of the pool, and you heave yourself over the edge. your dress is heavy, weighed down by the absorbed water. you wring out the skirt as best you can, but until you can give it a proper wash and dry, it’s really no use. gooseflesh breaks out on your arms where the cool air hits, and you shiver.
roger appears behind you, turns you gently with a hand to the shoulder, and lifts a fluffy white towel. “here. i found these.”
“oh!” you move to take the towel from his grasp. “thank you.”
“i’ve got it.” with a smile—a boyish, gentle sort of smile—roger unfurls the towel and wraps it around your shoulders. he tugs the corners beneath your chin and laughs through a short breath. “comfy?”
you nod, pressing your face against the warm fabric.
“you look like a marshmallow.”
lifting your mouth from behind the towel, you tilt your head with an impish grin. “you once told me i looked like an angel. so, which is it? angel or marshmallow?”
“oh, angel for sure.” he thumbs a finger over the end of your nose. “you always look like an angel.”
you roll your eyes and hope the action does not expose the sudden flutter in your chest. “you’re just saying that ‘cause you’re drunk.”
he shakes his head. “no. i mean it.”
he looks at you for a long time. you look at him for just as long. the unease cadence of your breath, the way his breath whistles through his nose, the lap of the pool against the tiled walls—it all sounds so loud to your ears, though nothing can compare to the beating of your heart. it fills your entire body: bump bump, bump bump, bump bump. your cheeks feel hot with blush, and you finally look away, casting your eyes to the floor. you wiggle your bare feet against the tiled floor; roger wiggles his toes back.
“we should go home,” you say.
“yeah.”
roger pays an attendant to ferry you home, and the drive leaves your entire body close to overheating.
the back seat of his car feels strangely intimate compared to the front seat, but that might just be your imagination. surely, roger didn’t sit so close to you on purpose. surely, his hand isn’t pressed against your leg because he wants it to be. his car is just… cramped.
“did you have fun tonight?” you break the silence, but when you do, your voice sounds strange—slightly strangled, nervous, earthy—and you wish you’d remained quiet. you continue toying with a loose thread on your coat, ignoring the way roger’s eyes traverse your profile.
“mhm. did you?”
you nod, but don’t look up.
from the driver’s seat, the attendant coughs, and your gaze shifts.
deep inhale, hard exhale.
chrissie’s words of earlier surface in your mind: you should tell him about the phone call. it’s only right.
twisting, you look to your right, meet roger’s eyes, and promptly lose all sense of direction. his face is so near, his mouth parted, eyes hooded, cheeks flushed. your throat runs dry, but you can’t look away.
“roger–”
“hmm?” his lips tighten, but his smile is just as sly as it had been the moment before he kissed you in front of the reporters. the touch still lingers on your mouth, but you will the memory away.
“there’s something i should—”
his fingers sift through a lock of your hair, and he moves his head almost in a nuzzling sort of gesture. you swallow hard. “i was wrong about you,” he whispers. when did his voice get so raspy?
“what?”
“i was wrong to judge you,” he says. his hand moves from your hair to the side of your neck, one long finger tracing the lines of your skin. “to be honest, i thought you were some cheap girl looking for a way into my bed, but i was wrong. you’re more than that.”
“what—” deep inhale. “what am i, then?”
his lips quirk upward. “my wife.”
hard exhale.
his mouth claims yours, and you don’t fight him. you melt against him, his chest pressed against yours in the narrow space of the car. you’re vaguely aware that a driver sits not two feet away, more than able to hear the way roger pulls a soft whimper from behind your lips and the rustle of clothes as you both scrabble for any exposed skin. but you don’t really care. you’re drunk off of roger, and have been since you met him. it’s his looks, yes, but tonight—tonight you saw him in his element. you heard him laugh and saw him smile and preened under his attention. you would go to hades and back to live in a world shaped just like tonight, every bit of it.
roger can’t keep his hands off you as you make your way from the sidewalk to the front stoop. his hands roam your body, skimming every inch, squeezing the parts he seems to like most. you giggle like young lovers experiencing one another for the first time, and maybe that’s because you are.
when you drop the front door key because you’re too focused on returning roger’s eager kiss, it doesn’t seem to matter. you just stand on the stoop and kiss beneath the light of the moon a little longer.
when you finally get the door open and his palm hits your ass at the same time, you squeal, and he dissolves into laughter.
when he fumbles with the hallway light because he’s too focused on getting your coat off, you tell him to forget it. you don’t need the light anyway.
halfway down the hall, limbs and lips tangled, the phone rings.
you laugh as you peel yourself from his grasp. he puckers his lower lip in protest.
“i’ll be just a minute,” you say, lifting the phone from the receiver. he sticks his tongue out, but then sheds his shirt, leaving it on the kitchen floor as he slips into the bedroom. you bite the edge of your thumb as you watch him go, your head as muddled as creamy soup.
someone clears their throat on the other end of the line.
“oh, sorry. hello?”
“what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?”
cold dread extinguishes any joy lingering in your chest at the sound of the sickeningly smooth voice. 
your fingers curl tight around the phone. “who is this?”
“what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?”
angry tears spring to your eyes as you scoot to stare out the window over the sink. nothing but darkness meets your eyes, but still you try in vain to search for an answer in the inky blackness. “i said: who is this?” your voice cracks, but you push forward. “how did you get this number?”
“what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?”
“i swear i calling the fucking police if you keep this up!”
a beat of hesitation then: “what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?”
with a helpless groan, you slam the phone down for the second time in one day. your fingers creak as you let go and step back, chest heaving. your skin feels slimy—slimy with roger’s lingering touch, slimy with the possibility that someone had been watching you kiss your husband, slimy with the possibility that someone could be watching you now.
you don’t stop and admire roger, clad only in his boxers, as you make your way to the en suite bathroom. you can’t stand to look at him, to know that somewhere someone cares for him so much they would take to harassing you. god, it makes you want to vomit.
you don’t bother with the bathroom door so intent are you at getting in the shower and scrubbing your slimy skin raw. you struggle with the zipper at the top of your spine, the tears hovering over your eyes threatening to spill over if you can’t be rid of your soaked clothing. you stamp your foot with a grunt and drop your hands, hanging your head in defeat.
roger’s soft chuckle sounds from the doorway. you don’t turn to look at him.
your back stiffens when he undoes the zipper, the pads of his fingers pressing along your shoulder blades, your ribs, the small of your back.
“that eager, huh?” he presses a wet kiss to the curve of your shoulder.
you want him; you really do. there’s some part of you that wants to drag him into the shower and work out your fears with the aid of his body against yours. but you won’t do that. you won’t use him, not when he confessed he thinks you better than that.
you twist to face him, holding the dress against your chest. “rog, i…” you place your hand on his smooth chest, feel the small hairs peppering his collarbone. “you’re drunk,” you finally say. “you’re drunk and you should go to bed.”
he smirks and pushes his hips against yours. “so? you’re drunk too.”
you shake your head. “no, not anymore.” you push him away gently. “believe me, roger, i want nothing more than to go to bed with you but—”
he plays with a lock of hair beside your face, and your desire to resist him weakens. “but?”
“i won’t do it while you’re drunk. besides, you’ll be over this by morning. you’ll go back to not wanting me. so i won’t do it—not while you’re drunk.”
with a huff, he lets you go, but not without kissing you once more. a traitorous tear slides down your cheek, and your throat seizes with emotion. somewhere in the back of your clouded mind, you wonder if you love him. or, if at least you are on the edge of loving him.
but it doesn’t matter. you’ll be gone in a year, and he will move on to someone else, someone strong enough to withstand his rabid fans.
he pulls away first and kisses your temple. “goodnight, angel,” he whispers.
you wrap your arms around your stomach and, once stood beneath the hot water of the shower, let the sound of the creaking pipes drown out the sound of your crying.
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roger is gone before you wake the next morning.
he leaves you a note on the kitchen island, scrawled in his plain script: “angel, i’m hungover now, not drunk. i’d still like you in my bed. – rog”
the note should send a thrill to your stomach, but it manifests itself in a ball of dread instead.
what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?
it’s heaven, but the price is hell.
you crumple the note and toss it in the bin, jumping when the phone rings. you hesitate, your gaze locked on the inanimate object that has come to haunt your dreams.
eventually, the phone stops ringing, but the shrill sound echoes in your head as you go about the day.
after the second phone call, tension becomes your constant companion. the days pass, and you withdraw into yourself, scared by the slightest sound, the never-ending line of cars outside the front window, and roger’s growing interest.
he seems to like you now that he knows you. he makes you laugh, asks you questions, even goes so far as to help you research university entrance exams.
but when he comes home from the studio, your stomach takes to twisting with apprehension as you wonder if your faceless friend watched him drive home and wonder further if your faceless friend can see roger kiss the side of your neck.
you try not to push him away. his attention is what you’ve wanted all along, and, though the romantic turn of events was certainly unplanned, he does make your knees weak and your head giddy like a schoolgirl’s.
still, the phone calls persist. it’s not every night and every day. you can’t trace the caller’s pattern because there is none. you never know who will be on the other end of the line. it could be roger calling during his lunch break as he is wont to do; it could be the university to which you’ve applied; or it could be them, the phantom who chills the blood in your veins.
there’s a pad of paper tucked beneath your side of the bed. the words of your faceless friend are scrawled across the page in frenzied handwriting, the handwriting of a madwoman.
what’s it like to kiss roger taylor?
did he buy you those earrings?
will he ask john to help you study for the maths entrance exam?
you should stop answering the phone; you know you should. but each time the phone rings, you respond like a pavlovian dog. you rush to answer, to frantically write down the day’s comment just in case there’s some sliver of information that might shed light on your faceless friend’s identity.
the caller is a woman; that much you know. her voice is deep and gravelly, but she’d referenced herself as the better woman for roger before. she seems to cling to the idea that you will leave him and the position of roger taylor’s wife will fall to her. if only to spite her, you will remain married to roger until your dying day.
you should tell roger too; you know you should.
but he’s happy.
when you first met him, he was sullen, dragging his tail between his legs like a scolded pup after the montreal debacle. it took a while, but you see him now for his true self. he’s carefree in a grounded sort of way, sold out for his music and the lifestyle it affords him. he’s gentle and kind and surprisingly considerate. he picks up the groceries when you ask it of him; he cleans the dishes from supper without complaint. he doesn’t pressure you for anything more than a make-out session on the couch when the lights are low and a record spins on the turntable. you would go further, but you can’t—not right now. he doesn’t ask any questions.
it would break you to tell him about the phone calls, and you can’t bring yourself to do it. each morning, you imagine his crestfallen face. you imagine the anger and the shouting and him calling the authorities and—
it’s easier for him—for everybody—if you just stay quiet.
besides, you’ll be gone in six months.
one evening, after dinner at an expensive restaurant, you let roger to take you to bed. he’d looked so pretty in the candlelight, and he’d listened to you talk about your hopes and dreams for the future. you think you fall in love with him when he drags you onto the bed and whispers sweet praises in your ear the whole night long.
when you wake the next morning, he is still there, and you snuggle into his chest. you breathe him in, and it’s bar soap from the shower and dried sweat and lingering cologne. his arms circle your back, squeezing you tighter.
“mornin’, angel,” he mumbles.
for a moment, you don’t respond. you keep your eyes closed and think back to yesterday.
there’d been no phone call. a blessed reprieve from three days in a row of randomly timed messages. roger had held you, and he holds you still. he is a comfort amidst your turbulent sea.
you should tell him. he can handle it. you’re tired of running from him.
rising to your palm, you meet roger’s gaze. he stares at you through his lashes, a sleepy smile on his mouth. he lifts a hand to cradle your face, and his thumb skims your cheekbone.
“how come you get a halo every morning and i don’t?”
you ignore his compliment before the bravery rushing through your veins dissipates. “rog, there’s something i haven’t told you.”
“yeah? is it about the freckle by your left ass-check?”
gasping, you slap roger’s chest. though he laughs, a red handprint remains in the center of his sternum, and he clutches his skin in pain. once settled, he apologizes and promises to behave.
deep inhale.
“about a month or two ago, i started—”
the phone on the bedside table cuts you off with its sharp bell-like ring.
your stomach plummets to your feet.
your eyes widen as roger holds up a finger and reaches for the earpiece.
he lifts it to his ear. “hello?”
some part of you hopes it’s your faceless friend. roger could deal with her himself. the other part of you prays it’s just a wrong number or john or—
“yes, fred, i know.”
hard exhale.
you slump to the side, leaning your weight against roger’s hip. thank heaven.
roger’s eyes slide to you, and he grins, winking. he squeezes the point of your chin between his forefinger and thumb, his eyes locked on yours as he nods and hums in response to freddie on the other end of the line.
“no, we won’t be late,” roger says. “yes, she’s coming. i promise i won’t forget.” he leans closer to the bedside table in his effort to end the conversation. “okay, fred. yes, i will.” finally, he heaves a sigh. “oh, for fuck’s sake, fuck off! i’m trying to woo my wife, so scram!”
“now,” he says, once the earpiece is on the base. “where were we?”
tugging on the back of your neck, he closes the distance between his mouth and yours. even with a hint of morning breath, you dissolve in his capable hands. he kisses you earnestly, and you struggle to remember what it was you wanted to tell him. he has this way with his mouth and his tongue and his hands that makes you forget everything but the feeling of him.
pulling back a moment later, he mumbles against your mouth: “what was it you wanted to tell me?”
you blink rapidly. “i—” damn, he looks so happy, glowing with youth and perhaps an inkling of love. you press your palm to his cheek then shake your head. “never mind. it can wait.”
he cocks his head to the side. “you sure?”
“mhm.”
“you remember the movie thing tonight, right?” he asks as he slides from the bed, drawing up his sweats from the floor and padding to the window. “that’s what fred called about.”
he throws the curtains open. the morning sun shines through, piercing every hidden corner, and your heart trips in your chest. your hands shake as you lift one of the bed sheets to cover your naked chest.
someone could be watching.
roger grimaces. “oh, shit, sorry, angel.” he tosses you his shirt from the floor, which you gratefully tug over your head. “anyway, tron, you know? we’re supposed to go to the premiere. something about flash gordon and—”
“i remember.”
“good. wear something nice because i don’t give a fuck about this movie, and i’d rather be looking at you anyway.” he smirks as he presses his palms against the mattress and leans in for another kiss.
you oblige him without hesitation.
“gotta go,” he says, pulling away only to firmly kiss you once more. “be ready by six, okay?”
you nod, and he leaves.
the majority of the day, you putter about the house. there’s chores to do—laundry and bills to catch up on and research for university admissions. it’s domestic work, mind-numbingly dull and repetitive. it leaves far too much space for your thoughts to run wild.
you admonish yourself for once more failing to tell roger of your faceless friend. you’d had the moment, and you’d blown it. with his unreliable schedule, there is no telling when you’ll have the chance to sit him down for a serious conversation again. you consider going to jim beach for help, but know once roger hears wind of it, he will fly off the handle because you didn’t come to him first. perhaps rightfully so, too.
you resolve that until you can find another peaceful moment, you will continue to suffer through it. it’s a step in the right direction, though. at least now, you have plans to tell him.
by five-forty-five, you are ready for the event. you sit in the living room, gnawing at your lower-lip as your leg bounces in anticipation. you haven’t gone anywhere with roger since the charity function earlier in the year. your faceless friend will surely be watching tonight, and already you feel sweat gather along your underarms.
roger unlocks the door and sticks his head into the living room upon his arrival. “car’s running. ready to go?”
you lift your handbag from the floor, nodding as you make your way to his side. roger stops you with a flat hand against your stomach. he bends to catch your eyes.
“you okay?”
“yes,” you say, but your voice sounds too rushed and eager even to your own ears.
he doesn’t hassle you for a more illuminative response. he just leads you to the car, opens your door, and makes his way to the theater, foot hard on the gas pedal.
as soon as you see the carpet—red this time—stretched along the sidewalk leading to the movie theater, bile rises in your throat. you reach for roger’s arm and squeeze tight. his head whips to the side.
“roger, i don’t think i can do this,” you breathe.
he frowns. “what do you mean?”
“it’s just that i’ve been—”
he pulls the car to the side. an usher opens the door, sound and light and chaos breaking the comforting quiet of the ride. your eyes flutter shut; you grit your teeth.
“[y/n], what is it?” roger’s voice is low, on the edge of irritation.
this is not the time. yet why do you feel like you’re going to pass out if you don’t—
“mr. taylor?” the usher prompts.
purging the emotions clawing at the front of your mind, you push roger’s shoulder and avoid his searching gaze. “nothing. go on! i’m right behind you.”
roger huffs as he slides from the car, but he dutifully offers his hand to aid you onto the red carpet. as he did before, he leads you toward the theater doors, stopping at the appropriate moments to pose for photographs. you hold on to the back of his jacket so tightly your knuckles crack. your eyes scan the crowd in search of your faceless friend. you will know her when you see her. she is a part of you now, like a demon on your shoulder.
roger rubs his hand up and down your back in a comforting gesture and leans to whisper in your ear. “you feel a stiff as a board,” he says. “what is it?”
you shake your head and nudge him further down the carpet. “we can talk about it later.”
“is it something i’ve—”
“no, roger. it’s not you.”
he studies your face a moment longer before nodding and returning his smile to the crowd.
near the entrance to the theater, a gaggle of girls wave their hands in an attempt to grab roger’s attention. he glances at you, and you nod, backing away to allow him one of the moments he so enjoys.
but one of the girls calls out your name. you lift your eyes to stop tracing the intricate weaving of the red carpet and stare at the girl in question until roger has to drag you over with a laugh. the girl shoves a newspaper in your face, your wedding announcement crinkled with affectionate wear-and-tear. she asks for your autograph, and you chuckle, feeling rather ridiculous as you scrawl your name across the page with a fat green marker.
it happens before you have time to react.
your head is bent as you sign the girl’s newspaper, your attention diverted from scanning the crowd for your faceless friend. but you feel her when she arrives, sense her eyes on your neck, and her fingers reaching for the sleeve of your dress. you have time enough to turn and catch sight of her long fingernails descending upon your cheek, but not time enough to stop her.
you scream more out of fear than pain as her nails scrape your face. truly, it does not hurt, though blood does begin to trickle down your chin and along the column of your throat.
it’s just that she’s there, before your very eyes, and she’s much smaller than you imagined. yet her eyes are dark with envy, and her nails are sharp. you recognize her labored breathing—deep inhale, sharp exhale—as she tries to move backwards and disappear within the crowd before she can be seen. you cannot look away from her, even when roger grabs your shoulders and wrenches you away from the iron gate. he’s shouting in your ear, cradling your uninjured cheek, but everything sounds like you’re underwater.
her face—round and childlike in its innocence—does not match the picture you’d created of her in your mind. she does not resemble the evil witch of your childhood fairy tales. she’s just a child, a little girl with a heart full of love for someone she cannot have.
your faceless friend is pointed out by the girl with the newspaper, and someone—maybe theater security, maybe queen security, maybe a good samaritan—drags her away.
roger grips your chin harder than he should considering the circumstances, but it brings your attention back to him. his eyes are ablaze with fury, and you suddenly feel the urge to cry.
“are you all right?” he demands. “are you hurt anywhere else?”
only my pride, you think.
“no,” you manage with a shake of your head. “no.”
“come on.” he slips his arm around your waist and pushes your head into the curve of his neck, away from prying eyes and flashing cameras. “we’re going home.”
the trip home is silent. your head moves back and forth across the passenger window, in time with the bumps and dips and curves of the road. there’s a fast-food napkin pressed against your cheek to stem the blood. you aren’t sure if it helps. roger keeps his hand firm on your thigh.
once inside the house, he forces you to sit in the middle of the bed as he scurries to retrieve the first aid kit. while he roots around in the bathroom, muttering to himself when he can’t find what he’s looking for fast enough, you strip yourself of your dress and return his old t-shirt over your head. you lift the collar to your nose and inhale his scent. when you draw the collar away, crimson blood and fresh tears stain the fabric. you sigh.
“fuckin’ hell.” roger drops to sit in front of you, his legs skewed to the side. a white, plastic box sits in his lap, and when he opens it, the contexts spill onto the bed sheets. “i’ve had this thing for ages. i think brian got it for me when i moved in.”
his hand returns to your chin; only his touch is gentle now. he looks over your wound, frowning at the sight.
“this is gonna sting, angel,” he warns.
it does. the antiseptic hurts, and you wince, but he keeps you from drawing away, his grip on your chin firm. he unwraps a butterfly bandage and presses it over the shallow scratch on your face. then he shakes his head, his face drawn tight.
“what is it you weren’t telling me?”
“there is—was this girl… and she kept calling, saying things.” you twist and unearth the pad of paper from under the bed. rubbing your eye, you hand it to him and watch his face darken as he reads the words.
he looks up, and you can’t bear to see the anger—the anger directed at you—in his gaze. “why didn’t you tell me?”
your first instinct is to shrug, to obfuscate, but he deserves the truth.
“you never wanted a wife,” you say. “you certainly didn’t want a wife who brought a stalker into the house. i figured—” deep inhale. “i figured i could live with it until our year was up.”
“oh, baby.” roger presses his forehead to yours. he cups your untainted cheek. “fucking up in montreal was the best thing that ever happened to me. it brought you to me, didn’t it?”
“you’re just saying that ‘cause—”
“no.” he draws back and grabs both shoulders in his hands. “i mean it. i never was one for marriage. didn’t make sense. but i get it now. it’s about partnership, yeah, but it’s about more than that. it’s about trust, too.” he smiles softly, pressing his thumb against your lip. “it’s about affection.”
he goes quiet then removes his hands from your shoulders.
“i wish you would have trusted me.”
“i’m—”
“don’t apologize. this whole arrangement is weird, and i don’t blame you for keeping quiet. i just wish you would have told me so i could help you.”
you sigh, dropping your head. “what do you want, roger?”
he lifts your chin, and you are struck by the love so firmly etched in his eyes. it knocks the wind from your lungs, leaves you breathless.
“i want you to keep my last name,” he says.
“what?”
“you heard me: i want you keep my last name.”
tears flood your vision, but not for fear or worry or regret.
you begin to smile, but the skin of your cheek pulls tight, and you wince, touching your injury. “ow,” you mutter.
roger laughs and pulls your fingers away from the bandage. he kisses each knuckle then rubs the wedding band along your ring finger. “can we give each other another chance?” he asks. “can we forget all the assumptions and just be us? i think we started on the wrong foot and somewhere along the way we switched—”
“yes.”
he stops mid-sentence, his brows drawing together in confusion. “what?”
“i said yes. i’ll keep your last name. i want your last name, roger taylor.”
he grins, and the happiness in every line on his face outshines even the sun’s rays. “god, you’re perfect.” he kisses you hard, and you laugh as you drop against the pillows, pulling him with you. he stops attacking your neck with his lips long enough to prop himself up and stare down at you. “but don’t you ever pull something like that again! if someone starts nagging you, tell me first thing. promise?”
you nod, stunned by his firm tone.
“say it.”
“i promise.”
he smooths the hair on your forehead, and your stomach somersaults to watch him examine you so openly “good girl,” he mumbles before lowering his mouth to yours again.
you lose yourself in him. he loses himself in you. somewhere along the way, you find one another, and all is bliss.
in the morning, legs tangled in the sheets and steady rain pelting the window, roger adjusts his hold on your waist. he’s still asleep, his chest rising and falling in time with his gentle breath. you pull his arm tight around you and smile into your pillow.
your cheek is still sore, and you’re sure there’s some poor nun who remains scarred for life after witnessing roger’s montreal incident.
but this morning you cannot find it within yourself to feel bothered by your faceless friend, nor by the scarred nun. indeed, you think, you should write them each a thank you card, because in a funny sort of way, they brought you to your husband. in a funny sort of way, they gave you love of your life. and for that, you are indebted to them.
you twist at the sound of roger’s yawn. taking his face in your hands, you smile at him. “good morning, husband,” you whisper.
he grins back. “good morning, wife.”
now this—this you could get used to.
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taglist (italicized handles wouldn’t work): @im-an-adult-ish​ @bluewillowmom​ @deakygurl @aprilaady @dancingdiscofloof​ @six-bloodyminutes​
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dexiao · 3 years
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Thirsty (Mark Lee series part 2, m)
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Part 1 is here.
Synopsis: Mark desires his roommate so much since that night, he just wishes that the thought of her body would vanish from his memory
Pairing: Mark Lee x female reader
Words: 0.85k
Genre: roommate!au, non-idol!Mark, smut, light angst, slow burn (overall)
Warnings: masturbation (male)
A/N: So, this chapter is indeed short BUT knowing Mark’s thoughts and feelings is part of the way, and I thought it deserved a chapter alone. I hope you enjoy it :)  Let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!
This is a work of fiction. It does not portray the real personality of the member.
Taglist: @kisskissshutmydoor​ @silverthessalonians​ @dumplingley​
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Since that incident on the living room, it is physically impossible for Mark to keep his eyes on Y/N. Lord, he couldn’t face her without feeling a wave of heat rushing through his spine, warming up from his face to his pelvis. He felt as if the image of her, lying half naked on their couch, was printed and attached to the back of his mind – and he couldn’t think of anything to change the situation.
Let us be really honest here. If Mark thought about the situation for a few moments, he would inevitably grow an erection. And he definitely thought a lot on it the past four days.
Was that an overreaction? Of course he had seen naked people before, and not only through porn. I mean, Mark did have a couple of short relationships and a good handful of hookups, so it shouldn’t affect him that much, should it?
He had fixed in his head the idea that seeing Y/N that night was like a curse, going to destroy their friendship little by little. For crying out loud, it was impossible to sit on the couch without losing control of his thoughts, having his mind wandering across such memories that made him blush like a pubescent kid. In addition, he would have to leave to his room, so he could jerk off in peace – although jerking off with his chest heavy of guilt wasn’t peaceful at all.
The boy hated himself for not being able to stop thinking of it. Actually, he felt drowned in absolute despair on the first hours after the first time he masturbated to that.
Once again, it’s not like Mark hadn’t done it before. However, he was used to consciously choose an object to his desire, and not to having his head constantly flooded by his hot roommate.
How was he supposed to get over it? Y/N literally lived with him. If he walked out of his room, Y/N would be watching a movie on the TV, writing an essay on the couch, baking cupcakes on the kitchen or whatever else. And if she wasn’t, traces of her presence would be there. A jacket hanging on a chair, a book on the center table of the living room, a hair band fallen onto the floor, the smell of her shampoo in the bathroom… The only form of running away from those things was moving out of the apartment.
Although guilty due to fantasizing about his friend, Mark was sore from masturbating so much. Every few hours he would become hard, and ignoring it was the same as asking for painfully blue balls.
He still wasn’t able to establish a balanced logic on when to masturbate and when not to. Between blue balls and following the thoughts that betrayed the control of his own mind, that was an easy choice. Was it even reasonable to call that a choice?
Mark believed that everything would just vanish from his head after a few hours, but there he was, muffling his moans by biting the left sleeve of his hoodie as he jerked off, hiding in the bathroom, back resting against the door. If Mark had ever wondered that suppressing his noises would become easier as time went by, he was indeed wrong. Rubbing furiously a part of his body that already claimed for rest only got more painful every other time.
Trying his best to push his mind away from the discomfort, Mark kept moving his closed fist up and down along his throbbing length. He bit and sucked his bottom lip, savoring a bit of the metallic taste of blood that emanated from the already bruised skin.
The dark haired boy felt the warmth spread inside his chest and rising up to his face as his climax approached. He suddenly squirmed and closed his eyes fiercely while hot cum spurted from his cock. Despite his attempt to keep the white sticky substance to drop only onto his hand, it stained his hoodie and the tiles on the bathroom floor. Mark cursed under his breath as he tried to stop panting, grabbing a small piece of toilet paper to clean the mess he had just made.
Becoming used to the weight of the guilt – that he realized he couldn’t run from – he had to avoid letting anything show to Y/N. The sudden increase in the attraction he felt for her (not like he was blinded to it before, more like he didn’t let it get into the way of their friendship), how unable he was to face her without blushing.
Whenever Y/N confronted him about his recently odd behavior, he would brush it off by saying that college was demanding too much from him, suggesting that he took more time to answer to anything Y/N said or asked him as a result of being too tired, and not of having to hold his breath and trying to calm down his heartbeat just for being in the same space as her.
In his head, he was doing a pretty god job.
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ivy-kissobryos · 3 years
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Thai Folk Magic
Below are some analysis of folk spells from Thailand, along with the theories of how magic works. All quotes are from "Monks and Magic: Revisiting a Classic Study of Religious Ceremonies in Thailand" by Barend Jan Terwiel. First, we will discuss love spells. Totally recommend the book to anyone interested. Everything that I read so far seem very accurate to what I experienced growing up.
Love Magic
One man reputedly won his wife by drawing a simple magical diagram, one of the category of the yan napaṭhamaṃ, while thinking intensively of the woman he wished to marry and saying the appropriate khatha. He waited seven days for the magic to take effect and, when approaching her, he noticed that she was more favourably inclined towards him. Yan napaṭhamaṃ means literally: ‘The first, or foremost letter N diagram’. The letter N occurs frequently in Thai mystical drawings, probably because it may be regarded as an extreme abbreviation of the expression namo buddhāya, hail to the Buddha.
The idea of drawing holy symbols in order to bring about an outcome is something common among many cultures, both eastern and western (like in Catholic folk magic where the cross is drawn for protection and to invoke the higher powers). I just find this intriguing because I keep seeing the symbol of the yan napaṭhamaṃ pretty much everywhere in Thailand, both painted on the ceiling of a taxi, on top of doorways or in front of windows. Good to finally find out what it means.
Another method to ensure the love of a woman, also reported by Textor, is to sit close by her while smoking a cigarette. The man should draw smoke deep into his lungs and, whilst softly saying the right spell, blow out the smoke so that it envelops her. A much stronger method consists of scooping up some earth with the big toe of the right foot, taking the earth in the right hand and rubbing it on the top of the head, whilst invoking the goddess of the earth, Mother Thorani (ธรณี), to assist in the acquisition of a bride.
The last two examples reveal that, as the magical practices become more strong and persuasive, less attractive material is used. It is not pleasant to be enveloped in smoke, and rubbing earth over one’s head is an action no Thai will perform lightly. The earth is often associated with pollution because it can be the recipient of human waste and animal droppings. Moreover, scooping up a bit of earth with the foot must be regarded as an abnormal, ‘inverted’ activity. The feet are the parts of the body that are held in lowest regard, and reaching for something with the foot is regarded in Thailand as the epitome of bad manners.
It is said among men that prostitutes use a similar magic. Reputedly a prostitute sprinkles some water that contains vaginal excretion at the doorposts and above the door of the house where she lives. A man walking near the door may suddenly be irresistibly drawn over the threshold. If he is wearing his string of amulets he should quickly take it off and give it to a friend in safe keeping before entering the house.
The quotes above is interesting in that the concept of holiness and unholiness (or pollution) is used to compel someone, with love/compulsion being viewed as a dirty thing.
When a woman is convinced that her husband gives cause for jealousy she may make a potion or a powder that contains some of her vaginal excretion. If a man consumes some food that contains this potion or powder, he reputedly loses interest in all other women and devotes his complete attention to the woman from whose secretions the mixture was made. A woman who resorts to these means should take care to practise this kind of magic in secret; if the man finds out that his food has been treated in such a manner, he would be very angry indeed, for her vaginal excretion will surely have destroyed the power of many of his tattoos and amulets and rendered him vulnerable.
Here, bodily fluids are used. This is like in various folk magic where menstrual blood is dropped into the food of someone in order to compel them to be attracted to you. What is more intriguing is the notion that something unclean like vaginal excretion could be used to render magical tattoos and amulets useless. Extrapolating from that, I believe that if one wishes to desecrate something, one could sprinkle water mixed with vaginal excretions onto it.
He reports that, if a woman fears that her husband has been treated with the vaginal excretion of another woman, she should obtain water from the bottom of three or seven taxi boats, and some moss from around the sanctuary of a monastery, or from the boundary stones of a bot. If her husband eats food containing a mixture of these materials, his previously alienated affection is restored. The substances chosen to counter the effects of aggressive love magic of another woman are obviously considered magically powerful in their own right [...] Water from the bottom of taxi boats must be seen as polluted and aggressive: it is where the wood starts rotting, the stagnant water has often an unpleasant smell, and it may contain particles of dirt from the feet of countless passengers. Moss that grows on the sanctuary of a monastery appears more ambiguously charged. On the one hand, it can usually be found on ground level, and may have been dirtied by the many dogs that roam the premises. On the other hand, a small amount of the beneficial power that is continually generated in the building itself may have permeated as far as the mossy outside. It seems, however, that the aggressive aspects prevail for the moss is reported to be one of the ingredients of a magically highly potent substance used to kill enemies.
For clarifications, a "bot" as referred to in the quote above translates roughly to temple. Again, the concept of sympathetic magic is used, dirtiness contrasted with holiness. Now let's discuss where magic comes from within this belief system.
Origins of Magic
In order to make a pressed or printed image, commonly known as phra phim (พระ พิมพ์), a monk needs, apart from the mould, a recipe, the proper ingredients, and considerable knowledge of spells, the sacred script and magical drawings. Historians will be sad to hear that one of the common ingredients of phra phim is the ash obtained from burning the oldest handwritten sacred books of the monastery [...] The amulets derive their protective power partly from the association with powerful things. The phra phim are made from sacred ingredients.
Phra phim is a type of flat, printed amulet. Amulets are sacred because something within them is sacred. The idea of burning holy texts to add power to a spell or enchantment is also similar to other forms of folk magic, such as in Catholic folk magic where psalms may be written and burnt and their ashes be used for protection or other purposes. However, as will be explained below, consecration is needed to make the amulets functioning.
In general, the inherent quality of the amulets is considered insufficient to ensure protection to the person who wears them. Apart from being made from auspicious material and depicting powerful symbols, the amulets usually ought to be sacralized. This sacralization can take many forms. The most elementary sacralization ritual, called pluksek (ปลุกเสก), can be observed, for example, when a monk gives a small Buddha image to a layman. Taking the image in both hands, the monk brings it close to his mouth and murmurs a short Pali formula. While uttering the final syllable of the spell, the monk may blow sharply upon this Buddha image. Some monks prefer to draw a simple yan over the amulet with the index finger of the right hand or with a pencil while saying the Pali words.
I used to translate "pluksek” as consecration, but here I can see why sacralization also makes sense. The way breath is used to imbue powers in an object is also a universal thing that is present in many forms of magic.
Another thing that is of note is that magic isn't simply sympathetic, but also based upon the concept of proximity and contagion.
The closer to the seat of magical power, the stronger is the influence of that force. Any object of the appropriate shape that is exposed to a strong dose of magical power will become a secondary seat of the force. This has been amply demonstrated in the rituals surrounding amulets [...] This is why the bundles of such objects are placed near a monk who is preaching, why the begging bowl of an ordinand contains them, and why bowls of water stand near the monks who complete their pavāraṇā ceremony. The principle is apparent in the rituals designed to sacralize amulets as well as those where a bowl of water is charged.
Placing water near a monk speaking holy words makes the water somewhat more holy than it was before. But, magic isn't just man-made. It's all around us, a part of the natural world.
It has been shown that, in addition to the protective power that emanates from people who utter sacred words or who meditate, there are ambiguous forces in the animated world, forces that may protect, but that could also be harmful. Examples of the ambiguous powers are the gods, the spirits of the ancestors, the anthropomorphic and theriomorphic powers that live in nature and are the legendary original owners of the environment, and guardian spirits.
There is no sharp division between physical powers of nature and magical power. The earth, which possesses the capacity to make plants grow and thrive, is sometimes seen in the shape of a beautiful female, Mae Thorani. Under the earth is the domain of the chief of the Nak, a serpent-like shape with the face of a dragon. The wind, the river, a tree, a house, and the monastery, each of these is connected with one or more unseen powers, conceived of in anthropomorphic form, and each of these unseen powers has its specific likes and dislikes. A farmer learns to attract their attention with candles, incense, and flowers, and develops skills in addressing and pleasing them. Nature has provided men with unexpected seats of power. For example, a termite hill may acquire a reputation for bringing luck; or when lightning strikes a building, the scorched plaster is regarded as magically powerful. A lump of resin that shows the shape of a Buddha is sacred, and a big stone that is dragged up from the river brings prosperity when laid in the rice-storage hut.
Death and the Afterlife
Now, I wish to discuss something less about magic and more about religion.
In the mouth a coin is placed, which the soul of the dead person needs in order to pay the fare to cross the underworld river, guarded by Phra Ketkaew Culamani, (เก็จแก้วจุฬมณี) or ‘Lord Bright Gem Jewel’. Probably this is Yama, the Hindu god who presides over the dead and who is described as ‘with a glittering form, a crown on his head’. This is followed by the ritual of tra sang (ตราสัง), ‘binding the corpse’. The undertaker uses a piece of white unspun cotton thread to bind the neck, feet and hands whilst saying the Pali formula: ‘Putto gīve, dhano pade, bhariya hatthe’. This is interpreted as a spell with which to free a person from the three strongest ties in this world: from the tie of children (whilst putting a loop with the cord around the neck), from wealth (when binding the feet), and from the tie of the spouse (while the hands are tied).
Two things are interesting here. First, being that payment is needed to cross an underworld river. This is very reminiscent of the myth of Charon and the crossing of river styx. The second interesting point is the use of binding magic. I have witness the ritual performed but at the time, I didn't understand what it meant. The irony of binding someone in order to free them is also very striking.
Other Tai peoples, especially the White and Black Tais of northern Vietnam, who do not seem to be influenced by Buddhism, have quite different views. In their eyes, a person has many khwan that, upon death, divide themselves in groups; some khwan go to the spirit world above, some are conducted to the house and can be worshipped on the ancestral shrine, while the remainder stay in the grave.
The quote above explores the question many people may ask: where do souls go after we die? I have pondered this question many times- if I give all that I am to the Witchfather, would my soul continue to serve Him even after death? If I devote myself to the Theoi, do I get to gain entry to the Hellenic afterlife? Would that mean that upon death, I could never interact with the spirits of my ancestors again as we are of different religious beliefs? The concept of khwan solves this line of thinking, in my opinion. There are many independent khwan in your body, just like your body is made up of millions of miniscule cells. Perhaps, a part of me would fall into milk and join the Theoi upon death, perhaps another will stay here to guide whoever comes after me. We are multitudes, both in life and in death.
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