#im at a weird part of my life sorry if i get all sentimental and wistful i just. woa. art 🧍‍♂️ | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

elliewiltarwyn · 3 months

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Top 5 Mounts! I love seeing which mounts people are drawn too!

ohhh, that's not something I think about often, and I'm lucky enough to have acquired a hefty number of rare ones, so this is going to be fun and sentimental! and maybe a little humblebraggy im sorry im not trying to be! :D

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Eden

like many players I'm sure, Shadowbringers was when the game really for good hooked me for life, and Ryne is a significant part of that. I loved her character so much that I was overjoyed when I realized the raid series was not only going to expand on her as a character, but give her a girlfriend.

But that's not the only reason; Eden's Promise is also the tier my static formed and we began to take on savage raids, and one of my greatest memories of this game is defeating the final E12S boss alongside them like 0.7 seconds before she enraged. The Oracle of Darkness is still one of my favorite fights in the whole game, and between that, the fact that the whole raid storyline is a handwrapped gift for lesbians who have Ryne as their favorite character, and a personal fondness for FF8 YEAH THAT'S RIGHT I SAID IT SUCK IT GAMEFAQS BOARDS FROM 1998...well, getting to ride Actually Eden in this game kind of rules.

I do wish it played The Extreme though. :V

2. Sunforged

Meanwhile, Abyssos was extremely memorable for, unfortunately, much different reasons. A lot of our group started facing a lot of personal problems IRL, and we had to say goodbye to some very good friends we had made and then bring new ones up to speed on the tier, so it took us an immensely long time to make it all the way to P8S, prog both phases of the fight, and get eight clears for all of us; we were struggling so much that even when the tier unlocked, we weren't able to clear him more than once a week. I still think P8S is too rough around the edges and I like the fight a lot less than the other Pandaemonium finales - not necessarily poorly designed, but extremely demanding to the point it was actually taking a toll on us.

...So basically, to me the Sunforged represents us dragging our broken, battered bodies over the finish line of the raid tier, succeeding despite all the shit both it and real life threw at us. We fought really fuckin' hard for this fucker, and as difficult as it was I'm really, immensely proud of us for managing it.

Also the mount itself is just sick af. Big fire snek!

and it turns into a godsdamned phoenix for flight, come on!!

3. Garlond GL-II

i mean come on this thing was built for biker girl femroes!!

4. Megaloambystoma

I am BEYOND LIVID that the Axolotl mount is locked behind Savage. Savage is for neckbeard no-lifers who play this game 24/7. Give them a crappy Magitek mount or something but cute mounts do NOT belong to raiders!!!

okay but seriously look at this dope. what a good boy. and in addition to being cute AF he ALSO has a sentimental story about my static's experiences with the relevant raid tier: for some strange reason, for the last bits of phase 1 and all of phase 2 of P12S in particular, I was the one who ended up studying the fight, writing down explanations, walking the group through the mechanics, and making callouts. it'd be a little aggrandizing to claim that Pallas Athena is my victory because obviously it's the whole group's... but it is the fight that somehow made me the one confident enough to lead my friends through it.

So in a weird way, this little dope is like, a representation of my self-esteem. I love him.

5. Fat Cat

I'm a cat person. I was morally obligated to buy this. Pay no attention to the mount description that posits that it is either a VOIDSENT using a BLOATED CAT'S CORPSE AS ITS CORPOREAL VESSEL, or a DECEASED PET REANIMATED by one well versed in the NECROMANTIC ARTS. these are lies and slander. look at this :3 face. is this the face of someone who would hide their true insidious voidtinged nature? clearly not. stop worrying about it. you don't need to sleep with a knife under your pillow with this baby around. >:3

this was really fun to reminisce and write about, thank you @disciple-of-frost for the ask!!

#ffxiv #final fantasy xiv #femroe #wol questions #ask games #ffxiv mounts #ffxiv raiding #there are so many good mounts that deserve honorable mentions but it was shockingly easy to narrow down top 5 at least lol #honorable mentions include: pod 602 because i love nier; battle panther which was my first tank achievement mount;#rolling tankard because it comes with a laser button; lunar kamuy because wayward daughter is AMAZING; fae gwiber bc trans rights dragon;#demi-ozma bc i like orb and cube; amaro because Seto still makes me cry; miw miisv bc it's just so out there and hilarious #there's a lot of good stuff! and i don't want to think about how long i've spent collecting all these rare ones! :')#long post #just in case

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kasaneteto · 5 months

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been thinking about this guy a lot. dont read under the cut if you dont want persona 4 spoilers or dont want to hear me talk about how i used to wish this guy would do nasty things to me because of my trauma

first of all this is not a character analysis this is my very personal relationship with the character. second of all this is normally the kind of thing i would put on my private instagram but my roommate is currently playing p4 & i dont want him to get spoiled. so sorry that youre subjected to this i guess. anyways.

recently something ive realized about myself is that i am a HOPELESS romantic. i require something to pour my affections into. & if that isnt a person WELL its gonna be a fictional character. for me the adachi blorboism started right after i ended my first real “relationship”. i say “relationship” because it was less of that and more of me being groomed by a guy 5 years my senior. unfortunately, this guy was what got me into persona. he asked me to watch the p4 anime with him and that was it for me lmfao.

so wtf does that have to do with adachi. well i didnt think it had ANYTHING to do with him until recently. being in therapy has allowed me to really dissect the way my environment has manifested in my behaviors and atp im confident in saying that getting groomed is pretty much the reason i love adachi so much. groomer man was the literal definition of a nice guy, like i made a nice guys finish last joke to him once & his actual response was “but it’s true though…” and he was SO bummed when adachi was revealed to be the mastermind. he was all “ooouuhhhh it sucks because he was such a good character before that”

so i got out of that relationship, had clarity over the fact that he had been manipulating me the entire time, got my hands on my own copy of p4 (i had still only seen the anime & played arena atp) and when i got to adachi’s monologue i was like. THIS GUY IS AWESOME!!!! HOW IS HE A WORSE CHARACTER FOR THIS!!!! im realizing now that travis (groomer) probably felt very attacked by adachi’s motives. & not only that but that i felt very comforted by how blatantly evil he is. that sounds really weird so let me explain.

i saw (& honestly still see) adachi as someone who’s a product of his environment. he felt trapped & suffocated by inaba, felt mistreated by his superiors at work, and with being given access the tv world found something that he felt he could control, which was fun for him in a world of boredom, of which he felt like the victim. i related a lot to that feeling of being trapped somewhere you can’t escape from (both because of my relationship & at the time living with my parents) and really appreciated his fucked outlook on life. not like. the misogyny part. just the whole “life only favors the lucky ones” sentiment. i also saw him as a much more honest & self-aware version of travis. he knew he was doing bad things to people who didn’t deserve it, and his justifications were just “i was bored”. unlike my ex who probably still sees himself as a victim

idk! i guess the takeaway here is that there’s still so much more to me than i know. im learning new things about myself every day. im very glad to finally be on this journey of self-discovery. ive always been a really introspective person but i dont think i ever asked myself WHY? why am i like this. like actually. so im doing that now. & the answers are actually pretty fucked up! ive always played down my trauma because its what my parents and a lot of my peers did. my “best friend” as a kid (she was honestly just a bully) didn’t believe me when i told her that my parents fought. like it was so much worse than i allowed myself to believe. i played down getting groomed because I wasn’t like r*ped or anything (he touched me with my permission but no insertion happened idk if that counts as r*pe) but whenever i tell people that my parents were not only okay with it but allowed him to come visit me from Canada and STAY AT MY HOUSE….they are always shocked. because thats so fucked up! like… what!

alright ive really gone off the rails with this but in conclusion: adachi is a piece of shit and thats why i love him. he’s my disgusting babygirl. my awful little mongrel anime husbando. & you dont get him like i do

#txt #thanks for reading this if you do #its long af 🫶#my husband

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iwadori · 3 years

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When they neglect you for another girl Part 5 (Kuroo)

Part One Part Two Part Three Part Four Part Five

Word count: 1.3K

Genre: angst, fluff

masterlist

You and Kuroo have been dating all throughout highschool and now your in you first year of university

It’s a bit harder to see each other because of your conflicting class schedules

But when you did see eachother kuroo has been acting a big suspicious, ‘secretly’ glancing at his phone or always needing to head out early.

And you were going to get to the bottom of this.

You were just finished with your class, and you had plans to meet your boyfriend at the library so he could tutor you for your chem test that you on Tuesday. On your way over there, you got boba for both of you and some study snacks to get you through the session.

You arrived their first, which you didn’t really mind as Kuroo was usually a bit late to your study sessions (especially recently with his dodgy behaviour.) You decided to go over your recent class notes as you were waiting, which was pretty useless as you didn’t understand anything.

You actually met Kuroo bonding over chemistry, since it definitely wasn’t your best subject so in your first year your chem teacher suggested getting a tutor and recommend Kuroo Testuro the self proclaimed best ‘chemist’ in the school.

It’s been half an hour and Kuroo hadn’t shown up, you were about to call him until you saw a quite disheveled looking Kuroo who is heaving out of breath.

“Tetsu, what happened to you?” you exclaim with amusement.

“Umm I kind of got in a fight?” he said questioning himself “well not really a fight but a disagreement.”

“A fight? With who?” you said a bit too loudly, as the librarian gave you an obnoxious ‘shusshhhh’ glaring at you.

“It doesn’t matter babe.” he said nonchalantly “I see you have your electrolysis work out, why don’t we get started.”

“But what abo-”

“So what is positive, the anode or the cathode?” he asked distracting you from asking him about what happened.

You spent two hours going over all the topics that were going to come up on your exam, and you can’t lie and say Kuroo didn’t help you. However, you weren’t as focused as you were wondering what happened to him.

After your study session, you both went to your dorms. Sadly, you couldn’t share a room since your University didn’t allow co-ed dorms (and maybe if you did live together, you’d be able to understand his odd behaviour.)

Even though he was still in highschool, every Friday afterschool you and Kenma made sure to spend atleast an hour playing a game online together, and today it was minecraft.

“Kenma help, theres a creeper outside my door!” you screech frantically running around on game.

“One second Y/N” he murrmed

“Kenma, do you know what’s going on with Kuroo.” you inquire.

“What do you mean, isn’t he being his loud cat-like self?” he responded

“Well yeah of course, but recently he’s been on his phone ALOT, and always leaving our dates early or showing up late and stuff so I don’t know I thought maybe you’d know something.”

“Oh maybe it’s just that he’s been pretty busy with Hana right now.” he said nochalantly

“Who’s Hana?” you say, your eyes squinting.

“Oh you don’t know Hana,” he said a bit surprised “Ooops Kuroo’s going to be so mad at me.”

“Mad at you, what do you mean mad at you?”

“Um, I got to go by Y/N!” he said quickly

“But Ken-” the sound of him leaving the party cut you off, and now you were in more of a confused slump then you were before. What is Kuroo hiding? And who the hell is Hana?

Since you couldn’t go over to Kuroo’s dorm right now because of your universities weird curfew times, you decided the only thing you can do right now is call him. After a few rings he finally answered and you could hear his background was really loud.

“Um, Y/N this isn’t really the best time right now – ow shit.” he said frantically.

“Kuroo, what's going on it sounds like you’re at a rave. Wait are you at a rave?”

“No I'm not at a rave I'm just – Hana stop doing that.” he said trying to whisper the last bit.

“Who’s Hana, Kenma mentioned her on PlayStation tonight but he didn’t explain.”

“Kenma did what? God – Ouch “there was ruffling in the background before Kuroo finally “Sorry Y/N I got to go..”

He hangs up before you could respond. What is wrong with these boys today?

It was your study week break, so you don’t really go into school to do classes you just have to prepare for studying. Which was great for you, since you could actually get revision done without being distracted and you can avoid Kuroo whilst thinking about what happened a few days ago.

Kuroo didn’t message you anyways, which kind of sucked, since these chemistry notes aren’t going to learn themselves. You went over each of your topics that you need to learn and you’d say you were pretty much ready for your exams. So for the rest of the week, you didn’t have much to do. Kenma was pretty busy with volleyball and his high school life and your boyfriend was still being odd and you didn’t have any real close friends at Uni since you’re only a first year and Kenma and Kuroo were mainly all you needed anyways.

You chose to go on a date, by yourself, to your favourite bookstore café to have some ‘self care’ time. On the way their you heard a familiar voice shouting down the street, looking in that direction you saw your boyfriend yelling “HANA!” “HANA!” repeadetly.

Going over to him you said, “Kuroo, are you okay?”

“Umm hey Y/N...” he said awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck “to what do I owe this pleasure?”

“The pleasure of being my boyfriend properly again,” you said smartly.

“Oh Y/N shit, im sorry about that” he apologised “I’ve just been really busy right now with Ha-”

“Hana.” you say rolling your eyes “Who is she?”

“I can’t really say Y/N, it was meant to a be a surprise.”

“A surprise for who?” you say

“Well fo-”

Before you can finish you say a loud ‘HISSS!’ Come from near your feet. “Hana! Thank god!” Kuroo said picking her up, but then dropping her again when she did a even louder HISSS at him. “Umm I really need to work on that..”

“So this is Hana.” you say a bit stunned “She’s a cat.”

“Indeed she is.” he said “ surprise...”

“You got me a cat?” you said still very stunned

“Indeed I did.”

“A feral cat?”

“Feral!” he said shocked “What do you mean feral!”

“Tetsu! She’s obviously feral!” you say reprimanded him.

“No she’s not! Look” he tried to pet her again and she nearly bit him and then sped off “Okay...maybe she is.”

Kuroo explained that he saw this cat one time outside of his dorm building and wanted to adopt her and give her to you as a gift. He’s been spending his time trying to ‘train her’ but every time it would result in Kuroo getting scratched up or him having to try and chase her around the city. You did appreciate the sentiment, however you reminded Kuroo that if he would’ve told you, you could’ve easily shown him that she was feral or if he listened to Kenma, then Kenma would’ve told him (which he did) that she was feral.

Kuroo did feel bad that his big plan didn’t work and he ended up looking like an idiot, not knowing the difference between a stray and feral cat. But you took him to a cat café as a little ‘pick me up,’ and promised him that for his birthday you’ll adopt a real cat for him.

An: this is basically a shit post but who cares 😃 Also am I the only that thinks that hana being a feral cat in the end is funny? Or is my humour that dry😭

#haikyuu x reader comfort #haikyu angst #haikyuu fluff #haikyu x reader #haikyu scenarios #haikyu headcanons #haikyu #kuroo testuro #kuroo x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #kuroo fluff #kuroo angst #signedwithane😌

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elysianslove · 3 years

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Hi! <3 I'm the roomate hc anon again (lol) and can I request best friends to lovers hc for iwaizumi, kuroo and oikawa? Also this blog is gonna blow up soon so remember me when you're famous bro 😌✊️❤️

OMG HI AGAIN! i’m so sorry this is late :( but oh my the excitement that flooded through me when i saw this request hsvhjsd. i really hope you enjoy this!! also vshdks i luv u bb THANK YOU.

iwaizumi hajime

im making these as detailed as fuck so i apologize in advance <3

becoming best friends with hajime was a very out of the blue thing

the two of you shared a lot of classes together, and since you were always seeing each other, you’d choose each other as partners a lot

you’d sit next to him in all the classes that you could

you’d meet up a lot during school breaks and just hang out

you two clicked very well honestly, like you found that it was so easy to talk to him, and it was so easy to lose yourself in the conversation

most of your convos are v mature and sophisticated too like

it’s nice when you can talk to someone on the same brain wavelength as you yk 😼

anyways overtime you’d come to his practice sessions, and even if they were long you’d just stay and watch bc why not

if you had hw to do and he noticed you were a lil stressed about it, he’d tell u to come study while he practiced as a change of scenery and all

he’d walk you home almost every night at this point

oikawa noticing and being jealous <3

“they’re stealing you from me!” “they’re not— what is wrong with you oikawa.”

okay so this best friend stuff has been going on for a long time

long enough for you to realize you wanted more from him

but this is iwaizumi hajime and it’s almost impossible to know what he’s thinking

ever

so you just keep it to yourself, thinking it’s just a small crush and it’s not worth ruining what the two of you have at this rate

so all this had happened first year, and when you’re nearing the end of your second year

that’s when you realize that

shit

it’s not just a crush

and when you have feelings for someone, every little thing they do expands a million times in your head

so a hug from him that you’d once never go over twice has you thinking about it as you go to sleep

the hoodies he’d lend you during practice while you stayed in the gym bc it was ungodly cold in there now send tingles down your spine at the lingering scent of him

the way he’d grab your hand to drag you somewhere now leave a heavy effect on your palm, forcing you to trace it once he’s gone

his texts give you butterflies

every time his name pops up on your phone screen you have a mini heart attack

and yeah

those are all symptoms of a crush

but is a crush meant to last this long?

at the start of your third year, you greet him outside of the school gates after not seeing you all summer

he smiles so bright and hugs you so, so tightly

you already are so hyperaware of how strong iwa is

but the feelings you have for him that won’t go away are so not helping your fixation on the feel of his biceps

anyways before this becomes v nsfw

you two catch up like u had met yesterday

and then at the end of the day, after practice, which you stay for bc u missed ur vbc boys 🥺

he walks you home

like always

and as he stands by your front door, in a burst of courage, he takes your hand in his and pulls you harshly towards him, pushing his body against yours and capturing your lips in a heated kiss

it’s so messy and harsh and you pretty much collided

but holy shit

you were pretty sure fireworks erupted when you two kissed

years of pining and what had felt like unrequited love finally being resolved

it’s the most satisfying feeling ever

you never want to stop kissing him

but alas </3

when he pulls back, you’re both breathing so heavily

you’re not sure if it’s the adrenaline or the kiss itself

and he just looks at you and goes “did u tan while you’re away ur eyes look brighter”

no sir i am in love with you

when you two officiate things

he’s actually way shyer than he was as best friends???

like as best friends he wouldn’t feel slightly weird about hugging you in public or grabbing at your hand randomly or being seen alone with you

but now like

people know ??? and somehow that scares iwa

or makes him uncomfortable

idk he just feels iffy

but ur so understanding bless ur heart <3

ur so careful with him and take it at his own pace

zero pda at the start of the relationship

like he won’t even wanna hug u in front of the seijoh team

but slowly he warms up

and he starts getting more comfortable with things like hand holding and occasional pecks on the cheek/lips

your traditions as best friends don’t die as lovers

if anything you believe in them even more

now you watch more diligently during practice

you proudly attend his games in his jersey, cheering the loudest for him (and for the rest of the boys bc they: best)

walks home with you are so much more serene

always gives you a kiss before he parts ways

idk it’s like some sort of commemoration for your first kiss/confession

unless you invite him inside 😏

this is so fucking long im so sorry i just love iwa

anyways anybody want boyfriend!iwa headcanons i got a lot hehe

to conclude, it was so gradual and inevitable with the two of you, and you’re forever glad it happened when it did and you hadn’t rushed anything <3333

oikawa tōru

unlike hajime, this wasn’t something that took one or two years

this bitch couldn’t admit he was in love with you for like 10 years okay

you’ve known him for the majority of your life, because you’d always lived in close proximity to each other

but you were never best friends yk? just acquaintances

it was around the end of middle school when you two got close

cause you saw he was applying to aoba johsai for high school

and you were like !!! i’m going there too

at first he was like stop copying me 😾

you guys had a staring contest bc y’all are idiots and there were legit tears streaming down ur face but u were not about to lose to a pissbaby like him

he blinked 😁👍🏼

and he lost

and then he decided “you’re my best friend now ”

anyways aside iwa, he now had someone else he was going into high school with

like it’s a completely new environment but he had two people he very much liked going with him !!!

when the time came around to like apply for/join clubs, you had been so clueless

but toru stuck by you !! and he was so adamant on helping you !!

he would sit with you after school as he practiced tossing with hajime and just brainstorm with you what you liked to do

it’s what brought you two closer together

cause you realized just how many things in common you had with him

for a full week he tried to help you come up with something

for the sake of this hc let’s say u decide to join the newsletter club

you’re very wary at first but then he’s like when ur part of it you’ll visit the vbc regularly so u can take pictures/observe to write essays

the fact that toru would be there kinda set you at ease

now you’ve never seen toru play properly

he’s practiced in front of you before

plenty of times

but a proper match? or a practice one?

never

so it’s safe to say u were in awe when you got assigned to go watch a practice match against (idk pick a school)

it’s embarrassing to admit but your eyes were on him the entire time

thank god he became the captain later on else it’d be so sus

you really tried to pay attention to anybody else lmfao

it’s kinda what drew you to him more

you still didn’t really have feelings

you only realized just how passionate he is about everything

at some point you had an essay to write for your newsletter about the volleyball club

but you were having a hard time like really getting into it

so you immediately just called toru and were like “help 😃”

he came over and you asked him a bunch of questions, and he would go on deadass 20 min rants for each of them

you were just

so amazed

like how could someone have so much passion for something like this?

you realize how but that’s for later

overtime you two got closer bc of how much your work was associated with him

he’s incredible as a best friend

he’s the first one with the school’s weekly newsletter as soon as it’s out

granted it’s to read the section about him but yk, the sentiment’s there

also love, love, loves lazy days with you

he doesnt even care if the boys know that he worships the chick flicks you two watch

i feel like oikawa would be an avid anime watcher

idk why i just do

so he’d be blasting anime theme songs on a speaker as you’re in the shower and he’s in your room waiting for you and you’re both just singing w the sound of water rushing down

actually it’s not just anime songs it’s all songs

a l l songs

anyways

so you two get really close, and then he has a super important match coming up

let’s say it’s the spring interhigh one against karasuno

the one they won

idk im just choosing at random

and the night before he’s like begging you on text to wear his jersey

he’s like PLEASE NO ONE’S EVER DONE THAT FOR ME

you’re like bruh u have a cult following ?????

but eventually u say yes

ur not really sure where it’s coming from but this is oikawa he’s an unpredictable as can be

when you show up in a jersey he so conveniently left at your house once

he’s so genuinely shocked even though he was the one that asked for this???

gives you the biggest hug like spins you around and just

“you’re my lucky charm”

when he wins

after celebrating with his team

he runs over to you

and just

he kisses you

full on the mouth

it’s probably the rush and excitement of winning that gave him the courage to finally spill all his feelings out into this kiss

you’re in his jersey, in the stands and you genuinely feel like it’s only just the two of you

despite how sudden it was the kiss is so gentle, like he’d been planning it since forever

“i told you you’re my lucky charm” he says as he rests his forehead against yours and kisses you gently again

oikawa had already been affectionate as your best friend

always displaying his love outwardly with like always calling out your name so loud whenever he sees you and giving you bone crushing hugs

deadass his 6’0 self will just jump on you

but now it’s extra

makki always gags around the two of you but you just stick ur tongue out at him and go “ur just mad ur best friend’s getting some pussy/dick and ur not”

makki then proceeds to shriek at you like a fucking banshee <3

anyways

yes

oikawa best friends to lovers excellence is so cute eeeekkk

and now u always wear his jersey at games

(u couldnt make it to the game against karasuno where they lost for whatever reason and he held it against u for the longest time)

(“maybe if a certain someone were there we wouldn’t have lost”)

what a big baby you love him

kuroo tetsurō

AH SEXY CHEMISTRY NERD 👅👅👅

kuroo as ur best friend

im frothing

i feel like you’d grow close after meeting at an event or something

like you’re a friend of a friend of a friend

i see kuroo as someone who’s so suave and cool and flirty with people he doesn’t have feelings for

but put the crush factor in and he’s a mess

like his brain just stops working

so when he first met you

he thought u were so fucking hot

but that’s it

his lower body was doing all the thinking <3

so he was so flirty

and that’s essentially what your friendship is built off of

and when friends are so flirty with each other, they generally grow close and trust each other really quickly

ur not a nekoma student but ur in tokyo so you meet up often

you just

it’s so nice to be around him

you find it so easy to just be yourself around him

going out with him is super fun

and a lot of the times you guys have study dates and you literally don’t talk except during the 10 min breaks you two take

it’s just hyper focus for the two of you which is great

he really channels the best student in you what a man !

i think during your third year of high school you two got insanely close

because you were highly unsure if you were gonna leave japan or stay

so you wanted to make the most out of everything

so you’d go out with him more often

he’d stay during the weekends and you two would like bake christmas goods all night even if it’s literally september lmfao

cuddling is so natural

like you’re both so touchy with each other but not in a weird way just a super comfortable kind of way

like if you’re shorter than him, he’s always leaning his arm on you like you’re his arm rest

it’s a win win bc he gets to touch you and tease you

wow the horny really jumped out in that one

anyways

you go to every single one of his games !!

cheer him on so!! fucking!! loud!!

you probably make a provocative sign and stand a chair and just wave it around and kuroo’s so heart eyes lmfao

the climb up to becoming lovers is so

natural?

i think kuroo first realizes that maybe, yk, he wants those flirtatious comments to mean something and those random touches to hold more romantic value to them, when you two are out together

it’s a completely chill day and it’s not really warm not really chilly. you’re just comfortable

he takes you to a park after buying the both of you ice cream from the stand across the street and sits down at a bench with you

just people watching

and then it kinda goes really silent

but

it’s not awkward??? like at all???

he’s not looking to fill the silence with any random words

he’s just

enjoying simply being with you

and he glances at you momentarily and it hits him like so hard just how pretty you are

his eyes slightly widen like

holy fuck

what the f u ck

remember when i said he’s all cool until feelings come into play

yeah 😼

he literally freezes up and blurts out, without even meaning to, “i think i have feelings for you.”

he really didnt even process he said that

you kinda

pause for a second

and then you realize what you said and you just smile and lean over towards him, lifting your thumb up to the corner of his lips and brushing away some ice cream

“you think?” you tease, and then at the spot where the ice cream was misplaced, you placed a gentle kiss

he kinda relaxes and then eyes you as he says, “i know.”

it is just. heaven after that

i think the two of you would be less flirty around each other once becoming official

like yeah he definitely comments once or twice every now and then and don’t get me wrong, so do you

but it’s just less frequent

like a blanket has been lifted to uncover the true, hidden meanings behind the comments and you can now just breathe easier

you two end up in the same uni on accident hevejsk

like you had a long ass talk about how it’s okay if you didn’t end up in the same uni you’d still make it work

and it would’ve worked tbh

fate just ships you two too much

when you told each other you were literally that spiderman meme of the two spidermen pointing at each other lmao

power couple of the uni

power couple of tokyo

power couple of japan

you’re literally so happy with him you wouldn’t trade him for the world

and maybe you saw it coming

but it still remains a shock whenever you wake up and he’s there laying next to you, smiling lazily at you before reaching over to give you a gentle kiss

anyways happy early birthday king i love you kuroo hehe

end note; i really had a lotta fun w this one omg!! thank you again for requesting, anon, and i hope everybody else enjoyed!! feel free to request, mwah <3

#haikyuu x reader #haikyuu headcanons #oikawa x reader #oikawa toru headcanons #oikawa headcanons #iwaizumi x reader #iwaizumi headcanons #iwaizumi hajime x reader #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo x reader #kuroo headcanons #oikawa x you #iwaizumi x you #kuroo x you

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hyukmoon · 3 years

Text

moon. | l.sy x gn!reader

lee sangyeon x gn!reader

word count: about 4.01k

to put it short: congrats! Something you should actually say, right? Your best friend and crush is getting married in two days and you feel,... well, not very good about it. So, wait... he's returning the feelings? Damn.

content warning: ANGST in capital letters, I would add lots of exclamation points but im lazy. So yeah, hella angsty. Some good old making out, it's kind of heavy at some point but no smut at this point lol. I don't condone any of the done actions, so yeah, I would've personally handled everything differently, but you know, y/n is kinda wild. Very awkward sometimes, but that's more the situation in itself. ALSO, NOT PROOFREAD

taglist: @loki-in-hogwarts

note: the second thing i wrote and im somewhat excited!!! Yes! Exclamation points. So,... thanks for reading :)

It was a great day. Well, at least seemingly for everyone but you. Your best friend in this world Sangyeon was about to get married to the love of his life, who is notyou and now you just stand in the hotel lobby waiting for it to happen. Funnily enough, the crushing feeling of desperation and fear didn’t seem to set in yet.

The hotel lobby was filled to the brim with acquaintances and other guests possibly confused by the uproar of the wedding guests. So, who were you specifically waiting for? The rest of your friend group, the ones who will most likely clean up after the wedding whatever will be left of you.

A nervous smile swept up to your lips, casually just avoiding every sort of tension that could come across you. Just with the luck of this entire occurrence an older woman started to approach you, demon alike features spreading around her face almost like she knew you were apparently the only single person here. An aunty, that wasn’t even related to you but had all the business to judge.

“Are you here for the bride or the groom?”, her sweet voice rang a familiar feeling in your stomach. Almost too sweet, making you suspicious of her intent. “I’m here for my best friend, Sangyeon. So, yeah, for the groom.”, you hesitated a second, “What about you though? Do you know the bride?”

“She’s my youngest niece, the only one that still visits, her sisters don’t even care anymore…” You nodded politely, not wanting to anger her now and stepped towards a different direction.

“So, my dear, are you here with anybody?” You already feared that question, the same as always. The eyes of yours started with a panicked expression searching through the room a familiar pair. “No, I am here on my own. I kinda wanted to focus on getting Sangyeon through with it, being there for him.” As a friend.

Possibly this was the first part of feeling despair and fear. People at this wedding were really waiting for them to get married. They weren’t joking, this would change everything.

“Ah, I see. You know, get over him. Well, it is time for you at least, you’re not getting younger. There are quite few handsome men here. I remember the names Juyeon and ah yes! Kevin, get over here!” As far as you were concerned, your facial expression couldn’t possibly look more stunned than a moment ago, yet another one of your good friends appeared, seemingly just as confused.

This only held on for a good second, Kevin knew exactly what to do. “Oh hi, I’m so sorry to steal [Y/N] away from you, but I actually need to talk to them on my own over a gift we both prepared for the couple!”, he grinned at the lady, who was obviously smitten with him. “Yes, of course, hun. Take your time.” She finally hushed into a separate direction.

“So, how are we doing? You seem kinda… stressed.”

“You don’t say”, you sighed, “if I have to go through a conversation like this again today, believe me I’ll-. “

“Yeah, I’m pretty sure I get the sentiment. Even though I meant more the other situation. Like in, Sangyeon getting married and you sitting here all grumpy because of it.”, Kevin was already aware of your “small” infatuation with your best friend, a man too far out of your reach also funnily enough, the man’s wedding you’re attending. However, your friend in front of you didn’t seem to mind talking about it out loud in a place like the hotel lobby. Your lips tightened up into a fine line.

“I’m not grumpy! I just…I don’t really know what to do. I mean, I know I’m going to be there for him but yeah, okay, I might feel a bit grumpy.” The lobby did clear up a lot now.

“Okay, oof. There’s this dinner with everyone in the evening today, do you think you can get through that?”, Kevin asked hesitantly just as stressed with this additional complication.

“I mean, I probably have to, don’t I? This makes me so sick, ugh. Not gonna lie, my stomach feels like a laundry machine.” You laughed quietly and drifted off again into a place where you didn’t need to think about this.

“What did you really expect though? You know I love you, respectfully, but like, this feels like an incredibly bad move to do.”

“Don’t you think it would be worse if I didn’t show up at all? I’ll just need to go through this weekend and I’m outta here. No one will know anything.” It might feel like a nightmare but at least a nightmare you can actually run away from and not actually have to face at some point.

“Well, I hope you’ll keep your confidence. Because imagine I saw the person, I love getting married to someone else. Oh my, believe me, you wouldn’t find me for the next three weeks.”

“Not very helpful, a good three out of ten. I guess, I’ll just stick to sulking around then.” A dead smile crept up your lips following a stern look from your side at your opposite.

“Seems like a good plan, just stick to me, maybe we will find someone to take your attention away from this, huh?” A sly grin was visible on Kev’s face.

“Ughhh, of course. Let’s do this. It can’t get much worse than that”, you cleared your throat, “thanks, though. You actually make this here somewhat bearable.”

“Awww, come on. We should pack out our suitcases.”

No one can really prepare someone for a moment like this. Most older folk turned into their hotel rooms which left you in a party like situation seeing your closest friends turning it up in a huge pavilion while the future groom sits comfortably on a velvety sofa hand in hand with his fiancée.

The air was quite warm even at this time of the evening, not humid, just warm enough for everyone to taste the end of this era with nostalgia and a slight feeling of energy to experience what’s to come afterwards.

You as well sat down, continuously processing your environment. With a cup of your favorite drink, you felt invincible, nothing able to shake you down.

Now while this wasn’t a preferred environment, this was manageable; you could look your best friend into his eyes and proudly congratulate him on his wedding. You would be able to get over this and continue to be a great friend. Black hair with an intense facial expression made its way into your viewpoint along with a somewhat tipsy Kevin. Simultaneously the lighter hair of your best friend fought his way through the crowd.

Lee Sangyeon, the man lighting up your mood with simple touch of his fingertips was now signalizing for you to head outside towards the veranda of the pavilion. He exuded patience, yet clearly waiting for a response of you. You nodded and brushed cautiously over your evening attire.

“Hii, [Y/N]! Can I introduce this someone to you? This is Juyeon, he might look a bit intense, but he’s really nice to talk to! So, I’m gone for a sec then!” Kevin started drifting off into a different direction where you stopped him in his tracks.

“Could this wait? Sangyeon needs to talk to me. I think it’s important, I’ll come back though in a bit!” You gifted both of them an apologetic face and made your way around the men towards the going to be groom.

Surely it wasn’t exactly clear why he wanted to speak to you, especially on his own. He was still waiting for you after all.

“[Y/N]! What has it been? Like three? Four months? I missed you so much.”, Sangyeon pulled you into his chest abruptly and sighed softly into your shoulder. Engulfed entirely in his figure you never wanted to wake up from this again. Was it now 10 seconds? 15 seconds? Neither he nor you really seemed to let go, taking in all the scents of his that were formerly familiar to you.

“Yeah, I think so. You were probably busy planning this all and I just had to work, I guess.” Trying to keep it short was your main goal, appearing distant maybe. He didn’t mind at all though. Not discouraged from continuing this conversation Sangyeon pointed at the veranda, showing the only speck of space with little to no crowd.

The veranda was close to closed off to the party. Non distinguishable palm trees in the far distance were playing right into your cards for not having to look into his eyes. Magnetically glowing, that’s how he appeared. All happy and smiley about the obvious luck he was experiencing. Now again, he sat down with you in the beach chairs without loosing a word.

“The palm trees are so pretty. You remember me wanting to buy some new plants?”, you tried to invite him to the conversation.

“You always want to buy new plants, which time do you mean?” Sangyeon grinned to himself. “You know what? It’s so weird. Everything feels still so unreal. This wedding, also you at my wedding… So weird.”

“I am literally your best friend, where else should I be? Your funeral? At home? Who else is going to charm the hotel staff for some free capri suns and new towels?” Your mouth crinkled up and you let out a soft laugh.

“[Y/N] … You know exactly what I mean!”

“Noo, not at all. I’m so confused right now, not gonna lie.” Your face finally moved towards his direction, seeing his gentle gaze resting on you.

“Do you remember when we were still in school, and we promised each other we would marry each other if we didn’t find anybody else?” His gaze got more intense with each sentence.

“Yeahh, kind of. I was probably tired and it’s like ten years ago. I’m not really sure what you’re trying to tell me.”

“I really thought I was going to marry you. For several years, actually.”, he laughed. “I had such a crush on you and then you met your s/o and all that. Ughh, it seemed so complicated back then. Kind of weird to think about what could have happened if I did ask you out or something.”

“True.”, you turned away again standing up and resting against the wooden railing of the pavilion. “But you didn’t so, let’s just drop it there.” The weather as well started rebelling a bit, the wind hugging your figure slightly too tight for your taste.

“Why are you so cold all of a sudden?”, he whispered closely behind you.

“Well, you’re getting married tomorrow. And you’re telling me about a crush you had on me?”, you croaked.

“I was just being nostalgic, I thought this would be fine with you.” Sangyeon appeared now next to you on the railing, waiting for you to face his concerned dark eyes.

“It isn’t for me. It just feels wrong.”

“What feels so wrong about it? It was a long time ago.”

It is here, the bitterness. Bitterness shouldn’t even be the correct term, the pain of your heart going into a slump didn’t feel like a fitting word. Being reminded again that you will never have a chance again.

“Wait or is it not a long time ago for you?”, The voice of his tried to word his next sentence very carefully.

“I went out with them because I thought you were joking. Then when I thought about you, it was always different. It was too late though, you met her.” Only the close ocean along with the wind were hearable, neither you nor he were able to form another thought put into a sentence.

“You could’ve told me. I would’ve-.”

“Broken up with her?”

“No, I-.”

“Then what could you have done?”, you interrupted Sangyeon’s rambling, trembling while speaking. Terribly spiteful with a bite that wasn’t too often dripping down your lips.

“This.” Sangyeon pressed a fluttery kiss against your lips. Slender fingers tapped onto the skin right under your chin, signalizing you to look at him.

The now much calmer atmosphere made you snake your arms around his torso. Heat rose towards your head, longing after a second out in the cold again just to see his lovely facial expression. Your lips broke off and touched once more in an almost hypnotic fashion.

His hot breath started sliding downwards your cheek to your neck, physically making you unable to resist his entrancing presence. Also his hands broached over from your face down to your waist, holding you with the lightest touch.

Sangyeon’s lips darted away from yours, catching you staring deeply into his eyes. The silence felt warm now as well, filled with the slow and recovering breath of the participants.

“[Y/N], I think I still feel that way.”, a rosy blush swept over the man’s face you wanted to hear say these things so many times and so long ago.

“No. No. No. You shouldn’t! I shouldn’t either! I have to go.” The reality of the situation caught up to you. This was bad. Incredibly bad. Still the disgusting feeling of hope within this made its way up to your head. Stinging alongside the feeling of remorse, you didn’t think clearly, especially now, next to him.

You darted in the fastest way possible from the pavilion up to the hotel to your room, leaving him there.

Today should be the final day. The hopes that already should have been buried a long time ago, crawled up again and clawed its way into your mind. What if he leaves her for you today? Like in those unrealistic rom coms. Yes, again, it was unrealistic.

Leaving her at the altar and running after you. While all those thoughts of hope and wishes came together you found yourself with a stomachache. His fiancée was an incredibly nice person, sweet and kind along with being a beauty. You shouldn’t even dare to think about Sangyeon that way anymore, she deserved a lot more. Quite honestly, you felt pathetic. Who were you to run into their possible future?

Just because of a simple brush over the lips, his eyes staring into yours like no one else existed but you and his soft hands delicately touching your waist. A tap on your shoulder put you out of your trance, “[Y/N]? Can you go up to Sangyeon’s room? He asked for you.” Kevin’s eyes glanced at you with uncertainty. Neither you nor he knew why he wanted to see you.

Even more importantly, why did he need to see you alone? This seemed like dangerous territory after, basically yesterday. Agony rose again, what if he really was going to leave her?

“Sure, I don’t know why he wants to see me again though.”, you said and left to see the groom’s room. You stumbled more and more over every step closer to the door of the man who’s going to rip your heart and air out of your lungs. The normally soft laid out carpet felt in this moment like you were stepping barefoot over glass. There was the door, brightly painted in eggshell paired with the digits of the hotel room.

Before you could reach the door to knock on it, light brown waves greeted your overtly surprised face.

“You clean up well.”, Sangyeon’s rang in your ears clearer than freshly hung-up laundry in your nose. His previously concerned face curled up into a faint smile.

“Same goes for you”, you tried your best to hide the very apparent frog in your throat, “So, why do you need me?”

“Just needed to see you before going out there, I guess.”, his voice got a lot quieter. It got silent.

Not sure if a said word was necessary, you plopped down on a small, velvety stool. Every whisper was to be heard. An otherness surrounded Sangyeon, like he wasn’t there anymore, and his thoughts took over his being. You scooted closer towards him, just wanting to see him up close for the last time like this, smelling his earthy cologne from this distance.

“Why are you doing this to me?”, your voice went close to hoarse after the question. He was just as silent as before. No sound, nothing. This torment of a weekend was supposed to end with no gratification, not feeling free from this feeling on your chest? Your hand slid over his, the most desperate attempt to get his attention while also experiencing his touch again. Sangyeon jerked his hand back and returned to his absent posture.

“Why do you want to hurt me like this? I am your best friend, and you use me like I’m nothing.” The lack of power you had now made you sink down to the beige teddy carpet. Small tears started swelling up in your nearly dry eyes, kind of contradictory, yet the more tear drops rolled down your cheeks the rottener and hollow you felt.

“You were my best friend until you-.”, he stopped midsentence, “made me feel things again I didn’t need, I didn’t want.” Also his face was wet, ridden with tears making his usually calm and cheerful persona look like a painful insult.

“You asked me here. It hurts, Sangyeon. I can’t make it stop hurting, I don’t know what to do”, you reached for him again, “Could I ever be enough for you?” He returned your former attempts to stroke your face. Cornering both of you, the air trapped you in the toxins of heartbreak and hopelessness.

Once again, Sangyeon’s hand glid over your soft skin and halted on your face. Glaringly staring into each other’s eyes, you were there again. The day before, yesterday. Close to baring the soul of each person present.

“[Y/N], it’s not about being enough. It never has been. I have made a commitment I already broke, I…I can’t do this”, he sighed, “you know I love her.”

“I thought you loved me as well.” Overwhelming nothingness overruled you, almost scaring you about this reaction. You weren’t crying, yelling nor having any physical reaction at all. It was convincingly numb; the resting hurt would come later. Sangyeon’s head dropped in the dip of your shoulder and neck.

This sort of closeness would never happen again. You feeling him breathing into you while having his comforting heartbeat close to yours.

“I do, but I can’t do this to her. I would never do this to her.”, he whispered into your shoulder. A sigh came from his side.

“Then, please. Kiss me, for the last time.” The last part of the sentence left a disgustingly bitter taste in your mouth. This was over, right? His head, which was formerly resting on your shoulder, drifted up and towards yours. Also his expression blank and hollow, like he didn’t know anything.

For the last time, his hands cupped your face in a comfortable manner. As always, he felt homely, but he surely wasn’t yours ever. Not even waiting a good second or two, the light brunette’s face came closer to yours. With no hesitation both of your lips touched tenderly, releasing every sort of affection that could be expressed at that second. You inhaled again his intoxicating scent, in the hopes of having him all over you. His now reddened lips moved closer towards your jawline making you gasp for air.

Also, you weren’t completely still, constantly shifting your hands up and down over his torso upwards his neck, desperately feeling everything, you can for the last time. Sangyeon’s locks tickled you softly while he suddenly latched his mouth onto your neck right below your ear.

“No. Please, I just want a kiss on my lips.”, you said lowly, closely resembling a whine afterwards. He complied pretty quickly, leaving you with no thought but him tickling your bottom lip with his warm tongue. With him being this fast, you didn’t want to keep him on his toes. Entirely engaged in this moment, hands surprised you again on your waist, wandering closer and closer under the blouse you were wearing. You moaned into the kiss, making him take the opportunity to maneuver his tongue into your mouth.

Similarly to you, he was also stunned for a short moment when you grabbed up onto some strands of hair. A sigh left his now plump lips, a need of fresh air arrived onto both of you. Yet this was short lived, his hands captured your chin and attached his lips again onto yours in a matter of mere seconds. A bell rang, close footsteps to be heard across the floor reminding you of the situation you were in.

“Why am doing this? I am so sorry.”, you broke off his lips and took a step backwards at the door.

“[Y/N], we both did this, and it won’t happen again. We just need some time without each other. I think it would be for the best if we don’t spend time together alone anymore.”

“Are you doing what I think you’re doing? I don’t know what to say. I-.”, His lips captured yours again fast with a lot more force behind his kiss.

A strong arm shut the about to be opened door again and hovered over your head. The other one caught grabbed your chin with an almost contradictory feeling to it, the lightest touch just to shove you into his direction. You sighed into his lips, waiting for him to commit with his tongue one more time. Buttery lips pressed against yours and clang inside your mouth. Fiercely did your tongues meet, ending with him sucking on yours. Wet cheeks batting against each other with no intent of separating, your movement still came to a halt.

“You know what? I hate this. I want you to be happy, then if it is with her, I will just y’know…go or uhm mind my business.”, you slurred the last part. It wasn’t really one of your most prideful moments. Still flushed with tears and embarrassment you dropped again against the room door.

“I ask for one condition though,” incredibly hearse was your voice after the crying and even more so because of your follow up, “I do not not want to see you for some time, I don’t want to have to see your face ever again.” Tears weren’t anymore swelling up in your eyes, they never seemed to stop running down with no chance of leaving this conversation with an ounce of self-respect and pride.

It wasn’t even really much of a problem to leave him behind for a bit, it most likely would be for the best anyway, yet while his words should only leave a small mark and feel like a ripped off band aid, you felt alone. A sense of loneliness crept stealthily into you leaving you with nothing but a severe feeling of dread.

“If that is what you want, I’ll respect that.” The room got quieter till you heard the last of his words: “Of course, I still want you in on my wedding though, you’re still my best friend.” Sangyeon’s usual soft and kind smile appeared on his face, seemingly reaching you an olive branch. The former assertiveness and confidence drained through the conversation; you were nothing but a wreck.

“Alright, I’ll be there.”

The ceremony was beautiful. Fairy like flowers were hung all across the beach space, making the place more surreal than it was to begin with. Everything light with a hint of light green and an even lighter lavender tone. The air seemed to have evaporated all the tension and sadness from your face. All across the seats were relatives and friends sitting with a nervously happy face. Ironically, he really thought it was going to be you someday.

“You’re [Y/N], right? Everyone always tried to introduce me to you. Now we’re sitting next to each other at Sangyeon’s wedding together! I’m Juyeon by the way.”

#lee sangyeon x reader #sangyeon x reader #lee sangyeon #sangyeon #tbz #tbz fic #tbz angst #the boyz fic #the boyz #the boyz au #the boyz scenarios #sangyeon x you #sangyeon x y/n #the boyz x reader #sangyeon tbz #the boyz kevin #the boyz juyeon #moon kevin #lee juyeon

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studioxlii · 3 years

Note

18 and Junhee pls!! Xx

"to be fully seen by somebody, then, be loved anyhow is a human offering that can border on miraculous."

proof read: kinda

warnings: none

note(s): the format might be garbage, im mobile.

Love is a weird thing but so are the conditions that come with it; the limits that people decide need to be in place. You understood boundaries or not wanting to take too many steps before you knew the relationship would hold but some things never sat right with you. It took a few years but it wasn't until you overheard some of your project group talking that it finally hit you; most people you knew didn't want to date their best friends for two reasons.

1. It could ruin their friendship. This reason was obvious and of course you understood.

2. They'd seen way too much.

You remember hearing those words and your head lifting, confused and wondering what that could even mean. When you were in a relationship that would eventually progress, weren't they just going to see those things anyway? You never could let that thought go, not once you decided that would only make it better; it would make a relationship stronger. Well, in your eyes.

Dating was something that seemed to come easier to you before those thoughts started polluting your mind; no one seemed to understand or see you in a way you really wanted. The ideal person for you was someone who saw everything; the bad days, the good days and the maybe okay but not so great days. It was really starting to mess with you. By not wanting to date certain friends, were you restricting yourself from the relationship you really wanted?

Only one person, one friend, knew you better than you knew yourself, you were positive of that. Your best friend of nine years, Junhee, had probably been through almost every bad thing possible in life with you. You began recalling all the situations you'd been in with each other that were memorable; the things you wouldn't have faced with anyone else because you didn't want anyone else to see.

'Do you remember when you got your belly button pierced?'

And that's when it began.

The question came out of nowhere, breaking the silence of your apartment and leaving Junhee to look up from his book confused and blinking. 'Uh.. yes?' His response came out slow, hesitant like he was missing some weird in-between the lines meaning of the question.

Your head tilted, finally looking over at him. 'Do you remember the way you squeezed my hand to the point it was purple because it hurt so bad you nearly passed out?'

His features flushed at the ridiculous memory being forced back into his head. 'You mean the same day you had to cling to me, crying because your first tattoo felt like your leg was being seared off?'

You hated crying in front of people for any reason but you couldn't go alone; you'd never go alone for something like that. You just nodded in response before returning to your own book, continuing to read like you hadn't brought the subject up at all.

Your first date after you began recalling things and getting far too deep in what could only be sentimental thoughts went okay. A friend of your friend's, Sehyoon, who was an art major and knew of you but didn't know you; he'd never really integrated himself into the small friend circle on campus but Byeongkwan spoke highly of him.

He was sweet; a gentleman. Pretty much anything you could really ask for but you noticed little things; minute things that didn't even matter. You felt like you were being unreasonable or judgmental despite only picking out things that didn't match. Didn't match what, exactly?

He wasn't Junhee.

The realization had you suddenly shooting up from your seat, interrupting the poor male's answer to your question about his major and spilling out several apologies as you even fought to put money down for your own food. It took quite a few more 'I'm really sorry's before you were speeding out of the small restaurant; you'd make sure to call him later.

You found yourself in the only place that made sense: banging hard on the door of the RA for your building, hardly caring if you disturbed anyone else.

'What?' was the greeting you received from a very frustrated Donghun, wanting nothing more than to be left alone again. And yes, you called each other your friend.

'We have a really, really big problem.'

Being a mutual friend and despite not wanting to get involved in anyone's "drama", he spent two hours talking you out of it, down from it and against it, reminding you just why your newfound feelings for your best friend were a problem. He even reminded you of your comment, three years ago, about how you could never possibly like Junhee; how he remembered that and you didn't, you didn't care to ask.

You returned home a wreck, tired and wanting to burn your own emotions. Were you really uncovering some unconsciously buried feelings or did you just like the fact that he /saw/ you? He'd seen you nearly on your deathbed sick.

He'd seen you living in a depression nest for two weeks, barely able to get out a bed and eating nothing but honey buns and cereal.

He'd seen you grieve family members and pets; seen you walk into the rain and scream at the top of your lungs because of how lost in despair you'd been.

He'd seen you drunk and stupid; he'd seen you the night after a one night stand and hungover to the point you wanted to fight the sun.

He'd sat by you absolutely throwing your guts up.

He had seen every single side of you and you'd seen the same from him but it only started to stack further and further.

You knew his favorite songs because God forbid he only have one. You knew his favorite color, favorite food and his weird retirement plan that involved a tiny petting zoo of his own that he refused to just call a farm. Your pins for everything were each other's birthdates and he was the only other name on your bank account. Why?

Staring down at the menu you'd seen over a hundred times, you were sure, you couldn't decide on just what sounded good and part of you just wanted everything. Those moments staring at words that started to blur, you noticed Junhee hadn't touched his menu and kept shifting around, visibly uncomfortable for reasons you couldn't possible figure out.

'It's unlike you to not be going off about the food here.. or already having ordered your favorite drink that, I recall, you said you'd die without if you didn't have it every time you came here,' you began, closing the menu and setting it down with narrowed eyes, 'what's going on?'

'It's stupid. Just.. order and get some food, I'll probably just eat later. I'm not really hungry.'

That was a bold faced lie and you knew it, the concern growing. 'And, what's the oh-so-stupid reason, exactly?'

It took him a minute, shifting more and acting like a child who had gotten in trouble. 'I, uh.. I can't really..' he gestured around, lips pursed and growing even more upset by the second, you could tell by the way he was trying to stop himself from frowning. 'Can't really afford it.' You were college students, it wasn't the world's biggest secret if you couldn't afford something.

'Do you really think I'm just going to eat in front of you?' You snorted, avoiding any comment that would further his being upset over the situation, 'Don't worry about it and order, okay?'

Financial struggles were no quiet matter between the two of you and never had been since you started school. Junhee lived off campus in an apartment with two shitty roommates, a terrible part time job and parents that pretty much didn't care if he perished on the side of the street somewhere. You, on the other hand, which you didn't like bringing up, were doing fine but only because your parents dropped something of an 'allowance' into your account for foods and necessities.

You ignored his attempt to argue and told him if he didn't order something, you were going to do it for him; he shut up.

The next day, you took a trip to the bank.

You could feel eyes on you as you splayed across the couch, staring at the ceiling and contemplating life and all of it's annoyances. No question left you but even if you wanted to say something, you were cut off.

'So, are you going to tell me what's going on? For the past.. three weeks? You've been asking me all sorts of weird stuff,' Junhee inquired, frowning thoughtfully, 'Are you testing me or something? Trust me, yes, I remember every single second I've spent with you. I remember every word you've said, the names of every guy you've been with and the ones I'd like to fight. I remember every birthday and gift I've given you and the ones you've given me. Yes, I remember your favorite things and everything so, what's the deal?'

It sounded sentimental at first but then you noticed that all too familiar waiver in his voice and out of the corner of your eye, you noticed his hands fiddling with the chain bracelet that had adorned his wrist for five years; he wanted to cry. A crying Junhee was something no one ever wanted on your hands and you briefly recalled a phone call from a very panicked Byeongkwan because of just that but you were letting your thoughts get off topic.

'I think I'm in love with you.'

'If you don't want to be fri-'

You were both cut off as your head turned to finally look at him, soaking in the unreadable expression on his features when someone busted through the door; 'Look!'

Both of you looked towards your two friends that invited themselves into your door, one holding a new cat and the other looking just as pleased with the announcement but it gradually dropped. 'Shit, did we interrupt something?' Of course, you always knew when you finally and truly confessed to someone that it would be Byeongkwan who ruined the whole thing; you used it as an escape, though, reminding yourself of what the confession could do to your friendship.

'New minion, I see,' you chimed, sitting up and ignoring the question, both of them, as you rose to greet Donghun's new pet. You were ignorant to the looks shared between the three boys and you were happy about that.

Now, you just had to avoid it ever coming up again until it was forgotten.

Junhee, however, didn't want that to happen.

After about an hour of chitchatting and ignoring the gaze of your best friend, you excused yourself under the excuse of having a meetup for a class, despite it being your dorm, and managed to weasel your way out. There was really nowhere to go, no one to talk to and you surely didn't have any plans for the next week; you ended up at the café on campus. It was quiet and filled mostly with a few students doing work and the two members of staff behind the counter, one eventually joining you at the table. He didn't say anything, waited for you to stop your dramatic Disney scene and acknowledge him.

'Would you date me, Yu?'

Taken a bit off guard, he ended up snorting. 'I can't tell if this is a trap or you want the genuine answer,' he replied, crossing his arms atop the table, 'but, on the hand that it's serious.. probably. I mean, I definitely wouldn't turn you down. We've known each other for a few years, hang out on a regular basis.. get along and have a lot of similar interests. So, yeah.'

The answer made your lips draw into a deep frown and you tapped your fingers against the cup, soaking up every word. 'Even though we're friends? What if we broke up?'

A soft 'ah' came from him as he realized what was really going on and he shrugged, thinking it over for a minute or two. 'We're both adults and I don't believe either of us would do something so that the breakup would be something that could ruin our friendship. I understand it would be like.. friends then it being intimate then back to friends, but I think both of us are mature enough to deal with that and not let it bother us too much.' He spoke like he'd been through it several times and in reality, it had only been once, a small fling with a mutual friend but they still seemed pretty okay. 'Is this about Jun?'

'Does everyone know?' You groaned out, releasing the cup to lean back and rub your hands over your face in defeat, 'I.. I told him I think I love him then Kwan and Donghun showed up and I bailed because now I don't actually want to face him or admit to ever actually saying it. I do! I do love him! I don't.. I don't want to lose him, you know?'

You could see the way the latter looked at you, sympathetic and calculating what words wouldn't just stress you out further. 'Look.. I know you don't want to hear it from me or anyone else for that matter because you want to keep saying it'll ruin your friendship when in reality, you don't like the idea that you could hurt each other, I was the same way with Donghun, so I understand.. but, you should really see all this from an outsider's point of view. Junhee looks at you like you hung the moon and you look at him like he painted the stars; yes, it's been like that since I've met you and a reminder, it's been years. I don't know what took you so long to realize it or if you've just avoided it this whole time but anyone would have to be blind not to see it. Now,' he sighed deeply as he finished and straightened, 'I think you should probably go and talk to him about it considering you just confessed then ditched but it's your choice. I don't think you have anything to worry about.. for either of you. You're the most loyal person I know, so I have no doubt you'd ever hurt him in a way that would ruin you guys and he can barely swat at a fly or sit still through hearing thunder, you think he's going to do something? Regardless.. one of these days, soon, you'll have to face it and I really hope you don't go into it with the cliché reason of your friendship being ruined.'

The words sank in slow and you wanted nothing but to cry your eyes out because he was right; he always was and you hated it. It took a while for you to speak and he seemed okay with that, briefly leaving you to fill a couple orders before returning. 'I know you're leaving for break tomorrow.. tell him before then.' Those were his last words before he bid you good luck and a good night, heading back to his own dorm, most likely to call Donghun now that he'd projected just a little bit.

Irrationality was a word that would be in your character description box and the word stupid could very well be right next to it because when you got home, you packed your bag and decided to leave early, not bothering to let any of your friends know. You needed time and you were being selfish, so selfish to the point you thought maybe he'd just hate you when you got back.

Oh boy were you wrong.

Two days into being back home and confiding in your mother who promptly smacked you upside the back of the head, you found yourself sitting on the porch and moping, split between what to do. You suspected the boys were a bit angry with you when you noticed the ample amount of texts, voicemails, social messages and phone calls that had gone ignored; you caught a glimpse of the absolute book Yuchan took the time to send you, leaving you kind of scared to even open it. It didn't take long for the guilt to set in but you chose to wait until you were back on campus to deal with it.

Or at least, that was your plan.

'So, I know you've never been a fan of confrontation but.. you've never been the type to run away.'

The sudden voice startled you as you hadn't even noticed anyone pull up and of course, upon looking up, you were met with the face you were trying to avoid the most. Junhee stood at the end of the sidewalk looking pitiful and shifting his weight in a nervous manner. You didn't bother trying to speak, not knowing what to say but you did wait for the rant, the berating that you deserved; that wasn't who he was though.

He even stayed quiet for a minute or two, making his way closer to sit on the steps, looking up towards your figure. 'Did you mean it?'

You could have answered right away, poured your heart out and let out the tears you'd been holding in since the moment you left. Instead, you stayed quiet and pulled your knees closer to your chest, not trusting your own voice. He didn't relent though, reaching out to lightly nudge your knee.

'That's all I need to know.. did you mean it? If.. if you didn't I can just leave and we don't have to bother with it again.'

'And, if I did..?' Finally finding your voice, you looked over to him, chewing hard on your lower tier, nervous and kind of wanting to throw up.

You could see him thinking it over before a faint smile showed up. 'I'd most likely cry.. but I'm going to cry either way,' he began, shrugging his shoulders while moving up to sit next to you, 'I'd also tell you that I love you, too and I've been trying to tell you that for years now.'

The confession made your heart flutter, your skin burn and the butterflies being kept back burst in delight in your gut. 'Even.. after everything we've been through? Everything you've seen..?'

Junhee nodded. 'Mhm. I'd go through it all again and what do you mean? I've seen nothing but you.'

#fairieswritings #a.c.e #junhee #clicheprompts #a.c.e scenarios #a.c.e reactions #a.c.e x reader #a.c.e imagines #a.c.e drabbles #kpop #kpop scenarios #kpop drabbles #kpop reactions #kpop imagines

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fairycosmos · 3 years

Note

i feel so utterly alone and i feel certain i will always be lonely no matter what lol do you feel me

yeah. i wish there was a quick and easy solution i could give you but i know it's quite literally just not that simple. sorry im sort of lucid rn so this is gonna be word vomit. its been the loneliest year of my life. i almost can't articulate it. i'm trying to practice it like a skill - like if i get really good at being alone it won't feel so heavy and i'll still somehow manage to be alright. but i won't make the mistake of thinking it can't get any worse than this because i know it can and i also have the feeling that i'm inevitably headed there. because it's like, once you've been alone for ages it's really hard to integrate yourself back into interpersonal relationships, to even know the first thing about being a friend or a partner. i think if i live long enough i'll end up drifting with no one checking for me because i don't know how to be a person, and i have tried. like, repeatedly. it's been years of it not working. so for me at least, i'm trying to just accept it. find anything that sort of resembles intimacy anywhere i can. you have to be careful with that though, be smart about it. anyway. i feel weird leaving it on such a depressing note so i will say i wrote a post pages ago about how once loneliness makes a home in you it's so hard to scrub the stench of it off and it begins to feel like an integral part of your personhood. the silver lining was the response to it. like thousands of notes and others echoing back the exact same sentiment. and obviously it's a minuscule amount of people in the grand scheme and it doesn't really matter but knowing that this feeling and fear lives inside of a lot of us kind of made me feel a real sense of connection - in a weird disjointed way. we are honestly not the only ones. we are all so alienated, if not in one way then in another. and something else that has me holding out hope is timing. i know that friendship/ love seems so common in everyone around you, seems like it comes so easily to others. and it is very human and understandable to feel left out and to crave it. but i honestly think finding genuine and sustainable bonds is such a rare occurrence, such a matter of luck and chance and waiting, for most of us. it's normal to have seasons of solitude in your life. it doesn't mean you're unworthy, it doesn't mean it'll always be this way. it's just the way the cards are falling right now. and it's ok to be sad about it, but lets try not to get too lost in it. nothing is set in stone. one day at a time. right i neee 2cquit rambling. wishing you so much love. i hope you find your people soon x

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ask-the-clergy-bc · 3 years

Note

I think this is okay to ask...but how do you think the papa’s would react to their s/o or friend losing a pet? (im sorry if this is weird i just lost my hamster so its been on my mind)

I’m so sorry about your little friend :( Losing a pet is never fun! Much love to you!!

I’m going with the reader being an S/O, as you would get more of a personal response from the Papas than if you were just a friend or a casual acquaintance.

Minor trigger warning for Animal/Pet Death

Papas When Their S/O Loses a Pet

Papa Nihil: Definitely has the most typical dad reaction to the lose of your pet. Offers to help bury/flush/scatter ashes of your pet so you don’t have to do it alone. He’s never been good with helping those when they lose an animal, as it’s a different way to console someone than it would be losing another person. But Nihil knows what it’s like. He once had a beloved pet Tiger that had to be put down. He remembers his own heart break at losing her and knows you must feel the same way. Chances are, Nihil is a bit tone deaf about it and presents you with a fine painting of your pet in remembrance to them! Just something he thinks would make you smile, since he got a painting to remember his tiger! If that doesn’t work he’ll take you to the nearest breeder to adopt another pet.

Papa I: While he is not the most sentimental person on the planet, he understands the importance of it. Especially with the lose of such a beloved companion as your pet. Initially Papa just supports you when you are hit with the loss for the first couple of days. After, he might ask if you would like to do some small memorials or make mementos of your pet. If you lost an animal like a cat or a dog and had their ashes, he might offer to let you plant them in a spot of his garden. Or he would surprise you with a framed picture you can keep next to their urn. Something that would make you smile and remember your companion fondly.

Papa II: While Papa is not the most visibly upset, he does feel awful that you are so hurt. He might not have been as close to your animal, but he knows how much your little friend meant to you and your life. Papa goes out of his way to track down an animal that looks almost exactly like the pet you lost- preferably one that is still young and growing. So don’t be surprised if you lost your fluffy white bunny only to wake up one day to a small fluffy bunny in the living room! Papa knows it can’t replace the love but it’s the only thing he can think to do to make you feel better other than just sit there and do nothing.

Papa III: Absolutely hates to see how heartbroken and devastated you are. Chances are, though he does not grieve as hard, it hit him in the heart too. Your pet was an important part of your life and therefore, an important part of his. Papa loved to bond with your companion. He would hold you and do whatever he could to make the passing easier on you, no matter how big or how small. But he might be eager to take you to get a new pet when you are feeling a bit better about it. In his mind, this is the perfect opportunity to open your heart to another animal who needs a good home! You have to be careful because he might pick out the animal for you!

Papa IV/Cardinal Copia: Takes it the hardest as he has the most sympathy. He knows what it’s like to lose a precious pet. Copia’s reputations proceeds him when it comes to animals. Though his own feelings are conflicted about his reputation, he does have a love and respect for rats. He’s kept quite a few as personal pets in various times of his life. And truth be told, they don’t live long. So he completely understands the utter heart break when yours crosses the rainbow bridge. He’ll hug you and stay with you as you grieve, just letting you get all of the icky feelings out. Copia would also assure you that you gave your companion the best life they could have possibly asked for. When the time was right he would offer to take you to get a new pet if you so wished!

#the band ghost #ghost bc #ghost headcanons #ghost fluff #minor trigger warning #animal death #pet death #papa nihil #papa emeritus i #Papa Emeritus II #papa emeritus iii #papa emeritus iv #cardinal copia #reader insert

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craftypeaceturtle · 3 years

Text

Distanced, part 2

Summary: How are these useless students coping with life?

Note: This is a group chat fic, my first one so this might not be that good! Also this contains swearing. Eventual intrulogical.

Part 1 here!

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 13:02

Hello, sorry to interrupt, but I just want to ask where you gathering your sources? Are there any particular databases you’re using? Thank you.

Remus Prince: I’m just going through the read list.

The reading list? But that only has one text that could be anything remotely useful for this topic!

Remus Prince: ye but it’s a starting point

Remus Prince: like u can read it and then read whatever it references.

Are we allowed to do that?

Remus Prince: wha

Remus Prince: DUH!

Surely that must count as plagiarism or something of the sort. You can’t use someone else’s sources.

Remus Prince: u sound so stupid

Remus Prince: u’ll read the book it references and form ur own interpretation.

Remus Prince: u’ll get different quotes

Remus Prince: u’ll be using it for a different argument

Remus Prince: why would u not be allowed to read texts!

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:13

Okay I emailed Dr Smith and he said it was fine. Thank you for the advice.

Remus Prince: OMG

Remus Prince: You actually told the teacher on me!

The teacher agreed with you? You’re not in trouble.

Remus Prince: THAT WAS MY SECRET!

Remus Prince: now the teachers actually think I’m capable

If it makes you feel better, I did not mention your name.

Remus Prince: you really had to double check?

Maybe I was being a little paranoid but I don’t think you understand the crisis I’m currently having. I typically spend hours running around the library and searching random titles to figure out suitable texts. When all this time I could have just been using the references! I am beyond furious and relieved at this new technique to research.

Remus Prince: ah of course

Remus Prince: you totally came across that way in the 2 messages you sent

My world view has been fractured, I think that justifies not texting much.

Remus Prince: why did you apologise

Excuse me?

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: now who sucks at reading!

Remus Prince: You said sorry in the first message.

I wasn’t sure if you were in a lecture or class. It’s polite.

Remus Prince: nah

Remus Prince: I’d answer even if I was.

That is not nearly as comforting as you are intending. How far along are you in your research?

Remus Prince: honestly?

Remus Prince: I’ve read five pages in on a book on the reading list.

Remus Prince: I’ve done like nothing.

That’s indeed some amount of research. Again, as long as you are done by the 15th then whatever it takes.

Remus Prince: See you said no judgement but I picked up a lot of judgement

We have already agreed your reading comprehension is not the best.

Remus Prince: HAH

Remus Prince: so what are u up to?

Actually working on the research project.

Remus Prince: im bored

Remus Prince: I’ve been sitting waiting for my washing machine for like 9 hours

Remus Prince: maybe later I will do work

I sincerely doubt it has been nine hours. How come you’re washing your clothes at such an awkward time?

Remus Prince: Awkward?

I can’t think of many students who would wash their clothes in the middle of the week day with classes.

Remus Prince: every1 washes their stuff on the weekend

Remus Prince: plus everyone knows the weekend is for doing nothing. Might as well get all my jobs done now.

You really plan to do nothing during the weekend?

Remus Prince: hells ye

Remus Prince: maybe, at most, I’ll send Dee to campus coffee

As long as you’re done by the 2nd. Though I really should congratulate you on your superior taste to coffee shops.

Remus Prince: ?

If universal opinion existed, then Campus Coffee being the best coffee shop would be considered one. For whatever ridiculous reason, both Patton and Roman don’t really like it.

Remus Prince: really

Remus Prince: I thought I saw Ro go in.

Roman occasionally practises lines with his other theatre colleagues and that is always where they meet up. But he never buys a drink as he is apparently a literal man child and cannot cope with a drink that isn’t just chocolate and milk.

Remus Prince: RIGHT??????

Remus Prince: my roomie V likes to pretend he takes coffee but he can only drink hot choc.

Remus Prince: He doesn’t deserve coffee anyway

Exactly! Have you talked to Remy there?

Remus Prince: YE

Remus Prince: He practically forced me to be his friend with how incredible he makes coffee

Remus Prince: He’ll even add energy drink to mine!

Okay maybe that is a little strange. But I wholeheartedly agree with the sentiment. He finally convinced me to leave my usual order of a white coffee and I have not regretted it.

He doesn’t actually add energy drink to your coffee right?

Remus Prince: ye he does but don’t worry he bullies me for it

Remus Prince: The entire time I sit and drink it he’ll be holding up his phone with 911 dialed.

That seems fair.

Remus Prince: without being so incredibly forward

Remus Prince: do you want me to grab you a coffee now

What do you mean?

Remus Prince: Well im bored

Remus Prince: and it’s your fault for talking coffee

Remus Prince: now I really want coffee

Remus Prince: I’m now heading that direction.

I’m sorry but I cannot meet up right now. I’m doing work and then I want to be prompt coming home to help my roommate.

Remus Prince: fair thought id offer

MESSAGES: To Remus Prince (Presentation)

Friday, 14:20

If you’re still willing, I am sitting in the library and I would truly appreciate it if you could drop off the coffee.

I can pay.

Obviously this is up to you.

Remus Prince: soz was walking

Remus Prince: ye I can do that

Sorry for not being able to sit around, but I do appreciate this.

Remus Prince: ur fine

Remus Prince: what u want

Firstly, it is “you’re”. Secondly, without sounding like a cliche film character, just say my name. Remy makes an effort to give me a slightly different order every day to “widen my tastes”.

Remus Prince: wow

Wow?

Remus Prince: For the very epitome of the nerd stereotype, did you really hit me with that “just say my name and they’ll know” trope?

Please, I can be cool.

Remus Prince: Are you begging?

Remus Prince: Also

Remus Prince: what do you look like again?

I’m sorry?

Remus Prince: reading comprehension! Fairly simple question.

I am wearing a black polo shirt with a blue tie. Caucasian with shaved hair. 5′10.

Remus Prince: how efficient.

May I ask why?

Remus?

Remus Prince: Soz I just got our orders.

Remus Prince: I’m really bad at faces.

You could have simply asked where I would be. I’m on the second floor, computer room 209. There’s a few others here but I’ll wave once you walk in.

Remus Prince: okay maybe that would’ve made more sense

Remus Prince: shutup.

I know I have stated this before, but we have indeed talked before. You will recognise me.

Remus Prince: listen I’m not fucking around.

Remus Prince: I am genuinely shit at faces

Remus Prince: it was one question prick

I apologise. I didn’t realise.

Remus Prince: Hey I’m here, now heading up.

MESSAGES: To Padre!!

Friday, 16:00

Greetings wonderful Pat! Did you perhaps end up baking today like you said you would?

Padre!!: Heya Ro! Yeah, we made cupcakes! We didn’t fancy making icing but we did have choc chips!

AW YEAH! Just wanted to check so I know whether to buy cake. Anything I need to pick up while I’m here?

Padre!!: All good here.

Padre!!: Logan saw Remus today.

hE DID????????

Padre!!: Yeah, he brought him coffee. Some special coffee, not his white coffee.

ASJKDGA

(also how on this great big boundiful earth do you know his usual coffee order?)

Padre!!: Because that’s what family does!

Why would he bring him coffee?

Padre!!: I have no idea. Logan didn’t really talk about it.

He didn’t talk about it?!?!?!?!?!?!!?

Padre!!: I don’t know what to tell you. He got all quiet. He makes it sound like they don’t even like each other but he still brought him a coffee.

EWEWEW

YOU DON’T THINK HE’S TRYING TO MAKE A MOVE

Padre!!: I don’t know. It sounds like it but Logan said they had a bit of a tiff in the texts.

... a tiff?

Padre!!: Like a small argument.

No I knew what it means, I meant it in a “omg you’re so adorable for describing a disagreement as a tiff”.

Padre!!: I want to joke around Ro but I am a little worried about him. He acted fine after the coffee and he said they didn’t talk. It just seems like such a weird thing to do! I’m worried Remus would try and pull something. This sounds exactly like how all those stories you tell begins.

Lo’s not an idiot.

He’s a nerd.

There’s no way he would fall into his trap. He’d let us know if something wasn’t right.

Padre!!: Good point.

I’ll be home in like 5 mins. I’ll run.

Padre!!: You don’t have to Ro.

Padre!!: I’m just overreacting.

Padre!!: Ro?

Padre!!: You better make sure you’re still looking both ways even when running!

#sanders sides #logan sanders #remus sanders #intrulogical #fanfic #My writing #roman sanders #patton sanders

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ddarker-dreams · 4 years

Text

Online Love. Yan Shigaraki x Reader [Part 3]

Part 1

Part 2

From: [First] 9:45 PM

today was so much fuuuun (＾▽＾)

From: [First] 9:45 PM

thank you for spending time with me tomo-kun... let’s get together soon again, okay??（´・｀）♡

“Soon, huh?”

Shigaraki’s words are intended for no one. He strains his eyes on his phone, looking over each word you sent. He knows he should respond, but all words escape him as his mind remains blank. Grimacing at these unknown feelings, he finally thinks of a half decent response.

To: [First] 9:50 PM

We can

For some, he knows the short response wouldn’t be satisfactory. But for you, Shigaraki never needs to present himself other than how he is. You never critique his struggle with social etiquette, or set expectations for him. Maybe that’s the reason why he’s so drawn to you, unable to escape your thrall.

Minutes pass since he sent the message, his phone in hand awaiting your response. On nights like this, where there’s no League business to attend to, he can offer you his full attention. Normally the two of you would duo and play an MMOPRG until the early hours of the morning.

Earlier at the mall you mentioned that you had made plans with friends in the morning, and wouldn’t be able to play tonight. Shigaraki had nodded his head at the time, but now that he’s all alone without your company, it hits him.

He misses you.

The thought alone is fleeting, but makes his stomach churn nonetheless. It was so unlike him, to have such doting feelings for someone. The sickeningly sweet sensation left a bitter taste in his mouth. To think that a murderer like him would have his knees turned to jelly by you so much as smiling.

Shigaraki hears a buzz, realizing that’s your response. Wasting no time, bloodshot eyes look over your response.

From: [First] 9:52 PM

i can’t wait!!!! i felt sad leaving, but yknow, life and all right? ˚‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥᷄⌓˂̣̣̥᷅ )‧º·˚

Shigaraki fights off waves of exhaustion, not wanting to miss out on interaction with you.

From: [First] 9:53 PM

u should come over my place next! i dunno if u will like my set up, it’s not the sleekest but it works just fine...

From: [First] 9:54 PM

wait that sounds kinda weird doesnt it??? im sorry if i sound pushy or anything, i just think itd be fun to game together, even if we just do gacha games! none of my friends are into this stuff so i’ve always wondered what it’d be like to just chill at home instead of going out (´Ａ｀。)

This is how you always are, getting flustered over the littlest things. Shigaraki doesn’t understand why you find so many things embarrassing, but there’s a cute quality to it.

Being alone with you in private would be a dream come true, but could he really contain himself?

In public there was a constant public presence that forced him to not act out. It would be excruciatingly difficult to not hold you and never let go if given the chance. Shigaraki is aware of himself enough to know that he acts out on impulse often.

To: [First] 9:55 PM

That sounds better than going out, whatever you want

Even if watching you squirm in an attempt to validate your previous words is tempting, he wants to affirm your plans as fast as he can. The mere thought of being alone with you is enough to cause his heart to beat at an unhealthy rate, a grin stretching across his face.

He would have every aspect of you then. All of your attention would be on him, all of your cute idiosyncrasies on display for him and him alone. Shigaraki wouldn’t have to concern himself with a Hero randomly appearing and exposing him, or deal with the looks he got in public for his shrouded appearance.

It’d only be you.

His hand grips his phone tighter in excitement, vision growing blurry.

You, you, you, you, you, you--

From: [First] 9:57 PM

aa what a relief *:ﾟ*⋆ฺ(*´◡`) i’ll have to think of a good date!

From: [First] 9:58 PM

tomo-kun... thank u for everything. i like talking to u

Shigaraki inhales through his nose sharply, unsure if he read the words displayed on his phone right. He reads it once, then twice. Three times. Then four.

From: [First] 10:00 PM

i’m a lil sappy aren’t i? hopefully u dont mind. i was just thinking that i can really be myself around u. u always listen to me and never complain about my rambling, it just makes me happyyy ー( ´ ▽ ` )ﾉ

From: [First] 10:03 PM

i’ve been called annoying a few times. it’s probably true but u never make me feel like im bothering u. idk why im saying all this lmaooo

How anyone could degrade you in that manner is beside him. He would kill anyone if they spoke about you like that, but Shigaraki realizes that wouldn’t be a comforting sentiment to send right now. Ah, shit. How do you comfort people again? It’s not exactly his forte...

To: [First] 10:08 PM

You’re fine, don’t worry

To: [First] 10:08 PM

It’s nice talking

Shigaraki’s fingernails begin to scrape against the sensitive skin of his neck, his lip being gnawed at relentlessly. Will you find this off putting? Should he have said something else? Or did he say too much and weird you out. If you ever were to reject him in any form, even he is unsure of what he’d do.

From: [First] 10:10 PM

tomo-kuuuuuuun (´;︵;`)

From: [First] 10:10 PM

thank u, it means a lot. i should probably head off soon... it’s getting late

From: [First] 10:11 PM

goodnight <333 thank u for today! i’ll talk to u tomorrow and we can game if ur up to it!

Ceasing his harmful actions, Shigaraki pulls his hand away to respond. Ignoring the warmth of blood traveling down his neck, he hurriedly types a response to you.

To: [First] 10:11 PM

Goodnight [First]

From: [First] 10:12 PM

o(≧∇≦o)

He thinks he might be in love after all.

#tomura shigaraki x reader #tomura shigaraki imagine #yandere tomura shigaraki #shigaraki tomura #shigaraki tomura imagine #yandere #yandere x reader #yandere x you #bnha imagine #bnha #bnha imagines #bnha x reader #yandere bnha #my hero academia imagine #my hero academia #my stuff

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ccsthemovie2 · 3 years

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(I think it's a word over 500, but:)

"Speaking of Tsukishiro, how's he doing?", Eriol asks. Frying pan to fire to volcano.

"He's good," Touya says quickly, before Sakura can say anything. Yukito is not even in the ballpark of "good". Yesterday he called Touya and begged him to bike over and said it was important and when Touya showed up he was asleep, and stayed fast asleep right through to the next morning. He keeps trying to make appointments with doctors, and then falling asleep before he can call, or, when Touya calls for him, before he can make it out the door. Privately, Touya isn't sure how much good a doctor can do for him, but anything has to be better than this, right?

"Really? I'm glad to hear it." Ugh, how much has Sakura told him. Not that she doesn't have a right to talk to her friends, but, come on, would it kill her to least keep it between her and Tomoyo and the funny looking cat.

He's good, that's an obvious lie. Ruby has said Yukito could barely stand upright at school. Every inch of Touya Kinomoto is packed full of magic. Sooner or later, Eriol figures, either Sakura will be powerful enough to sustain him, or Yue will have to get over himself and just eat already. Touya can't actually do anything with his magic, so it's not like Yue, even weak as he is, will have to face much of a struggle to take it. (Aside from competition with Ruby, of course. There's something to that, right, articles and studies about animals being healthier if they need a bit of careful planning to get their food? Yes, so this works out nicely.)

Or maybe- oh, that's probably it. Yue's on to him, isn't he? He's just being stubborn as usual, figuring sooner or later Clow will appear via Eriol and save him. He can imagine how surprised, overjoyed, grateful Yue would be, if Eriol showed up and saved his life. He can imagine Yue's head resting on his neck as clearly as if he had kept Yue well-fed with magic a thousand times in his lifetime. It would be nice, in the short run, but it wouldn't be right, no. Clow is dead, and Yue needs to learn to live with that. If he knows what's good for him, he will take responsibility for his own life, and if he doesn't...

Ahh, well, maybe it's Clow's old sentimentality, maybe Eriol is just warming up to Sakura's moon guardian all on his own, but he can't bring himself around to the idea of letting Yue just die. He'd save him, if it came down to it. But, he tells himself sternly, only as an absolute last resort. He's just worrying because he misses Yue and wants to get to know him better all at once in that past-and-future way- it's worth a visit, soon. Yes, a nice little visit, and Yue will never even have to know it happened. Just to check in.

(sorry the formatting got weird when i copypasted lol!)

hiiii thanks for the ask!!!

if we talk about this convo we need to back up and talk about how it got here. this should give you some idea of how badly this needs to be under a cut for length lol.

so it all starts with the bit about how someone falling and being caught is something that happens a lot in ccs. how with eriol, it's purposeful, and with fujitaka (and i misremembered it but since found out she fell *on* him and not *caught* by him, which lolol i hope he broke a bone, but also its fine the fic's already marked canon divergent, or maybe the story gets misremembered, whatever, in any case), it's an echo of clowriol's intentional artificial-trustbuild-dangersaves but without the magic or purpose to back it up (just like fujitaka himself!), but it's a situation he quickly makes favorable to him, because it may be a blank slate but it's made of the same material.

this whole convo was part of one of the very first chunks written, but everything was going to go in a very different direction at first. (there's a lot of Cut Content from this fic, some that i just didn't like, some that wasn't connectable with the rest of the fic after it took the shape it took but might pop up somewhere else one day idk). in this particular bit i cut the later half of the conversation because i really didn't like what i'd written, but then even though the direction of the story changed the conversation was still going so it had to bounce somewhere else, so it bounced to yukito. here we are answering your ask 2 paragraphs in!

yukito, iirc in the anime, did catch her from a fall, (in the manga, which made way more sense for why she had to change her clothes and rest so much, he saved her from drowning, again iirc because who can trust a memory) and at a point where eriol still has some investment in making yuekito/sakura (ewwwww) happen, he's going to try and draw on that symbolism to nudge her in that direction, right?

so all this said, SPEAKING of yuekito. how are they doing.

bad, obviously. touya's freaking out. i imagine that part of what's stopping yukito from seeing a doctor is yue, though- he knows it wont help, and i dont think yukito has, like, person insides that will stand up to medical tests, and yue would pick up on yukito like, not wanting to be outed to the doctor as a magic construct because he, like, doesnt actually have a real heart that pulses, just a repeating heartbeat sound. doesn't for real have blood etc to test, just records of blood type (for personality reasons).

and also touya's a very like keep-ur-problems-not-everybodys-business type so hes like imagining sakura venting her fears to this weirdo and getting pissed off. but that didnt actually happen, eriol knew all on his own lolol. touya you have to say something nice should happen to sakura to make up for wrongly suspecting her now

and this bit on eriol's end is all wrong information and inaccurate conclusions and i was really worried ppl would take it at face value but i hope nobody did. in ccs we get moments where eriol wants sakura to take power, or to learn that power can be taken- his final battle with her, for example, where the answer to his light and dark puzzle is to use kero and yue's power, except that's not something she would ever Want to do or would even Occur to her to try. the power is gifted to her by kero and yue (and syaoran!) because they love her.

same concept, here- the answer to the 'yue is dying' puzzle is to eat touya's power, and he can't imagine the real reason why he won't just do that, and when he thinks about it too long it goes right to his ego- yue looovvvvesss clow, and by extension me. he wants meeeeeee to save him. he wants to neck kissy MY magic soo sooooo bad. but yue isn't considering any of that at all. he's thinking about yukito and what touya means to yukito and why that would make yukito hesitate to reach out, and that no way in hell will he just ambush his other self's crush down a dark alley and take his magic, even to save both their lives. he's a lot more selfless than clow and eriol ever realize. maybe- this is just a half formed thought right now, i dont know if im like certain about it, but- maybe they feel his devotion to clow was a form of selfishness, that he Wanted Love as a thing he could hold and own, whereas pretty much everybody else who meets him goes like YOU SELFLESS MAN YOU CANT JUST DIE FOR PPL YOU CARE ABOUT YOU GOTTA TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF TOOOO

and there’s also that bit of teacherliness intrinsic to the three of them again: im doing this to teach him a lesson. im letting ruby do her thing without telling her what’s going on to help and encourage yue, etc.

anyway, that (in terms of fic weaving itself into canon) solidifies his decision to do uhmmmm a thing that creeps me out real bad in the anime (knocking yue out to have a moment with him, and oh, ding, there's another 'you fell but i caught you' moment!). eriol loves this manner of hanging out with people, you see it later in this fic, even:

It's important to say what's in your heart to the people you want to say it to, even if you have to make sure the other person never hears it. It's important for your own emotional freedom.

he loves to spend time with people exclusively on his terms, to the point where the other party never even knew he was there, because he knocked them out, or because he was just staring creepily at the outside of sakura's house while she did homework, etc etc etc.

tldr: it's all connected, aaaaaaaaa

#ask

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myelocin · 4 years

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hello im BACK with a VENGEANCE (also bc ur rqs are open) can i please have sakusa kiyoomi (you hurt me with that angst fic), comfort song: Home by Miki Ratsula (you wont regret listening to it, its heartwarming) genre: fluffy take care!!

Hello!! Sorry this came out late, my brain was mad empty lmao + I’d like to note to thank you for all your kind words and responses!! ily alot ;A; thank u so much for reading my works <33

In The Process of Our Becoming

Sakusa Kiyoomi, You

Fluff! WC: 1k+

It starts in a grocery store. You would like to imagine for the circumstances of you and Sakusa’s first meeting to be a lot more romantic than just reaching for the last bottle of bleach simultaneously but that was how it happened. Kiyoomi, on the other hand liked to reminisce. Apparently you had a “good judgment of cleaning products and didn’t just get the cheapest thing on the shelf” and that was, according to his words, his “deal breaker” in a relationship.

From the start, the two of you bonded over the mundane parts of the adult life, but it was from another trip to the grocery store where you bumped into him in the cleaning aisle, again, and spent an adequate amount of time debating to yourself about which wipes to get—that Kiyoomi blurted out if you wanted to get dinner with him sometime.

“That’s weird.”, your friends told you, and you shrugged it off with a laugh. After all, it wasn’t every day that you’d meet a really cute, professional athlete at a random grocery store who asks you out while you’re just deciding which cleaning wipes to get.

And later on you decide that it was a good idea because under the mask he wore, he smiled pretty. Sakusa Kiyoomi could hold a conversation pretty well for someone who posed pretty blankly for his media appearances, you mused.

You roll your eyes every time he reminisces the story from the grocery store, but he knows you love listening to him tell the same exact story the very next day.

Sakusa Kiyoomi hates crowds. Oh god, he loathed crowds.

Though, over the years he had managed to somehow tolerate them; considering how inevitable it was to be in crowds because of his career, after all.

Before you started to become a little more involved with his career, Sakusa would usually be the first to retreat to the locker rooms first to avoid the swarm of media after games. His team was understanding enough to let him be, so he supposed they never minded much of it.

Knowing that by the time you attended his third game, it came as a surprise when from the stands you saw Sakusa’s eyes wander around the bleachers until it eventually landed on you. Your relationship with the athlete at that time had still been fairly new and kept away from the media, so when he pulled down his mask and shot a smile that you knew was meant for you, it caught you more off guard.

“I thought you didn’t like crowds.” You told him after, and he shrugged and slipped his mask back on replying, “You were there so it’s not as bad now.”

There were many things about Sakusa you know you’re still not aware of, and vice versa. Even two years into the relationship, there are still mornings where you’d ask him how he prefers his coffee, while there are afternoons where he’d call you from the grocery store because he didn’t know which cereal you preferred.

“You should have known more about him by now.” Your friends mused when you couldn’t settle on picking a gift for his birthday (the fact that he wasn’t very vocal about the material things he wanted didn’t help much either).

And at first, that thought bothered you, so during one morning when you wake up to Sakusa’s fingers threading into your own, you turn to face him and try to think of every fact you know about him. Inwardly, you grimace because you realize you don’t know much, so when he turns to face you, you say, “I don’t know a lot about you. I’m sorry.”

“I overheard you talking to your friends about the present the other day, by the way. Is that what this is about?” He turns to you to ask, his fingers still threaded with yours.

You settle your head against his chest and listen to him speak, “I don’t know a lot about you either, but we’re still getting there, (y/n).”

He moves to turn to his side, supporting his weight with one arm while he faces you, “I know you hate spicy food and listen to Home by Miki Ratsula as a comfort song. I know your birthday, blood type, and biscuit preference now—“ he pauses to tuck a lock of hair behind your ear before continuing, “—but I still don’t know every childhood story you have. I don’t know what makes you still cry when you watch Ghibli movies even if you watched it twenty times already, but I’m going to know those reasons one day.”

You blame the fact that you just woke up that you’re feeling a little choked up, but Sakusa says, “But I do know you’re about to say that you want to cry right now because I know the fact that you’re a sentimental person. I know you like forehead kisses and like it when I hold your hand if we’re in Tokyo station—“

“Because I know you hate how crowded it gets during rush hour, Yoomi.” You cut him off, smiling.

“Yeah, you do.” He says, dark eyes looking soft in six am light.

Sakusa reaches forward and encages you in his arms with a kiss to the forehead and a quiet mumble of a good morning.

So for that morning you let yourself lay flush against his warmth with his words still echoing in your ears. And you suppose Sakusa is right. Two years was only a number against the lifetimes you know would be witness to the story you are writing with him.

And as much as you cringe at how your story began in the cleaning supplies aisle of the local grocery store, you know that there is no end. For every day that you wake up with his fingers threaded with yours, hear his morning voice break through the morning silence, and feel his lips press flush against yours, is another page written where you learn, explore, and fall in love with Sakusa Kiyoomi.

#haikyuu #hq #haikyuu!!#haikyuu x reader #hq fluff #haikyuu fluff #sakusa kiyoomi #sakusa kiyoomi x reader #sakusa kiyoomi fluff #sakusa fluff #sakusa x reader #sakusa kiyoomi imagines #sakusa kiyoomi scenarios #req

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