#not just for them but for your mental health as well

[calicoheartz]

overworked reader and paige forcing her to go to bed🙏🙏 need some hurt/comfort

Anchored Affection ; Paige Bueckers ♡﹕

꣑୧ — summary | overworked & anxious reader , paige comforting reader :) happy ending yay

wc ; 709

— warnings | hurt & angst , mature themes + topics , fluff at the end

my master list ㇀♡

a/n : this hit waaaay too close to home , tried my best to accurately represent mental health while giving you guys some angst with a happy ending ! Enjoy ◡̈

The ambient lighting in your room helped you feel a little bit at ease, the light reflecting onto the scattered books sprawled out on top of your desk, as your eyes darted across your computer screen.

You had always been a high achiever, always pushing yourself to excel in every aspect of your life. Whether it was constantly studying for exams, or finishing your homework wayyy in advance, you always centered your life around academics.

You had struggled with anxiety since you were a kid, often struggling to express your feelings, and having a tendency of bottling everything up. With the pressure to succeed, to meet the expectations of others, weighed heavily on their shoulders, a burden that seemed to grow heavier with each passing day.

Paige had started to notice your habits were starting to take a toll on your mental health, but as much as she tried to support you and be there for you, it felt like she was helplessly watching you slip deeper and deeper into the darkness of your own mind.

The clock on the wall ticks, the lines of exhaustion etched into your face were unmistakable, a silent testament to the toll your overworked schedule was taking.

Your girlfriend Paige on the other hand, was already in bed. She knew you had work that had to be finished, but once it passed a certain time, she knew she had to drag you into bed with her.

The blonde simply sighed, slowly getting up from your shared bed and made her way to the living room, where she discovered you sprawled out against the floor, with papers scattered in every direction around you.

"y/n, it's past midnight," Paige's voice was gentle but firm, cutting through the silence of the room. "You need to rest. You've been pushing yourself too hard lately."

But you simply waved off her concern with a tired smile, their eyes fixed on the glowing screen in front of them. "I just need to finish this one thing," you insisted, your voice strained with fatigue.

Paige's heart ached at the sight of your stubborn resolve, knowing all too well the dangers of neglecting one's own well-being in pursuit of perfection. With a sigh, she approached you and gently closed the laptop, ignoring your whines of protest.

"y/n, listen to me," Paige's voice was soft but unwavering as she took your hands in hers, her eyes searching yours with an intensity born of love and concern. "I know you have a lot on your plate, but you can't keep burning yourself out like this. You need to take care of yourself, okay? You're important to me, and I hate seeing you like this."

You felt the weight of Paige's words settle over them like a comforting blanket, warming them from the inside out. Tears pricked at the corners of their eyes as they finally allowed themselves to release the pent-up tension they had been carrying for so long.

"I'm sorry, Paige," your voice slightly cracked with emotion as you buried your face in Paige's shoulder, allowing yourself to be held in her comforting embrace. "I just...I'm so afraid of letting people down. I feel like I have to be perfect all the time, and I'm so tired of it."

Paige's heart broke at the raw vulnerability in your voice, the weight of your shared struggles hanging heavy in the air between them. But she also felt a surge of determination, a fierce desire to protect you from the relentless pressure of their own expectations.

"You don't have to be perfect, baby," Paige whispered, her arms tightening around them in a gesture of unwavering support. "You're already more than enough, just the way you are. And I'll be here every step of the way, cheering you on and reminding you to take care of yourself."

With Paige's words echoing in their ears, you finally allowed yourself to surrender to the sweet embrace of sleep, their weary body finding solace in the warmth of Paige's love. And as they drifted off into dreams, they knew that no matter what challenges the future may hold, they would face them together, hand in hand, bound by a love that could weather any storm.

tbh idk how to feel about this yet. I’m trying to put out the best content while also writing fast enough to finish all the reqs. As always , tysm for reading ❤️

#wlw #wlw imagine #wcbb #paige bueckers #headcannons #my hcs #wcbb x reader #paige buckets #paige bueckers x reader #uconn vs iowa #uconn wbb #uconn women’s basketball #uconn huskies #angst with a happy ending #mental health #positive mental attitude #anxitey #i love you

[intimidating-fettuccine]

Mansion walks

This is mostly just a ramble post, but I keep imagining, because it's getting warmer, that Slender has made the executive decision to start going on mansion walks with everybody. He thought that it would be better if everyone started getting out and getting fresh air more, despite complaints that they get outside enough as it is, so now every day they go on walks together as a group. Some of them handle this much better than others, but they're surviving.

BEN handles it the worst. He goes in his physical form, and while BEN does actually like getting out and walking around, he cannot handle the heat at all, so he's panting and sweaty and uncomfortable by the time they get back, and he just wants to collapse and not go out anymore. However, he still goes because as much as he won't admit it, it's fun being out there with everyone, joking around and talking while they walk. 

Jason also can't stand it. He has a visceral hatred for bugs so he doesn't like just wandering around the woods in general, but it also causes his hair to get all frizzy from the humidity, and he doesn't want to get dirty or gross at all so he spends most of the walks focusing on avoiding any mud or dirt or nature in general because he would much rather be back in the mansion in his clean, sterile environment and away from all of the grossness of the woods. He argues they should all just go to a park or something that is more open and spacious, but Slender always reminds him that it's just easier and faster to walk through the woods, rather than trying to get everyone to a park.

Jeff, Toby, and Natalie handle it the best. Jeff has always loved the outdoors since he was a kid, constantly running around outside to stay out of his shitty living situation, and Natalie was the same way. On the flip side, Toby's inability to go outside growing up has made him treasure being outside, and he prefers spending his time out there. The three of them are usually leading the group, and the most excited and boisterous to be out there running around and getting out in nature. The three of them benefit a lot mentally and physically from these walks, and it really shows in their improvements overall since the daily walks have started.

While some of them voice complaints about the situation though, all of them are showing some form of general improvement from being able to get out and be in the sun, soaking in some fresh air for a little bit every day. It gets them all closer, providing everyone a time when they're all together in the same place and able to talk and catch up with things. It allows Slender to keep his eyes on them and catch up with them as well, making sure everyone is doing okay and feeling fine. It's good team building for them, and good for their mental and physical health overall, and so the morning/evening (depending on the weather) daily walks have become a mansion staple. It probably also helps that Slender makes everyone a bunch of snacks and fresh drinks when they all get home to reward them for it. It makes him very happy to see them all getting along and being more active instead of just sitting in their rooms all day.

And, you know, it would make him even happier if you'd join them on those walks too, as would everyone else. You always liven things up, and your company would make it even better for everyone involved, so make sure you're getting out and walking too. They'll be proud of you and happy for it.

#creepypasta #creepypasta headcanons #creepypasta headcanon #creepypasta x reader #slender mansion mayhem #slenderman #slenderman headcanons #slenderman headcanon #ben drowned #ben drowned headcanons #ben drowned headcanon #jason the toymaker #jason the toymaker headcanon #jason the toymaker headcanons #ticci toby #ticci toby headcanon #ticci toby headcanons #jeff the killer headcanons #jeff the killer headcanon #jeff the killer #clockwork #clockwork headcanons #clockwork headcanon

[yuyu1024]

Babe

Pairings: S.coups × y/n

Genre/tags: protective/possessive bf

Warning: 🔞🔞🔞 fluff but smut, unprotected sex, pet names, cursing, semi public, handjob

~~~ [lmk if i miss anything]

Words: 3k

Disclaimers:

- this story is just made up

- english is not my first language, please be nice 😊

A/N: looong time no post. ✨️I was away... got sick and mentally not doing okay... and I dont think im 100% okay yet...Its been hard but still trying my best :)

i might be coming back to writing here and there... but not consistent. Hopefully you understand...

meaning, i will be a 🐌 in updating nor posting and won't be online mostly. 🖤

(i cant promise i can jump back to the Yoongi/Suga series yet also sorry 😭 hopefully one day but not soon.)

Me writing... is depending if im okay.

Also, Thank you for the kind messages in DMs. I really do appreciate them...even tho i don't reply 🖤 pls know its very helpful.

Thank you.

P.S its been a long time since i wrote anything so.... rusty.🥲 this is my just trying to get back to it.

-----------------------------------------------------

Seungcheol, your boyfriend, texted you to meet him at school. Which surprised you the second you read it because it has been weeks since he went to school.

He has been doing special online classes these past weeks as he can't walk. Yet. He slipped while playing soccer with the boys two months ago causing an injury on his left leg. It was very painful to watch him yell in pain during that game. It was supposed to be just a fun game with his friends and you and their other friends watching but yeah, accidents happen.

"What are you doing here?" You gasp the second you enter the University clinic and saw your boyfriend sitting and chatting with the school doctor.

"Babe." He smiles and opens his arm, asking for a welcome hug

"Babe!" You squeal and immediately run and hugged him tightly.

"I missed you." He mumbles lightly lifting you off the floor even he's sitting on the clinic's bed.

He never lost his strength.

"Ditto." You say and kissed him on his cheek before letting go. "Wait... why are you here?" You ask again. "He can go back to school now?" You turn to ask the doctor behind you

"He can. But I still suggest no." He folds the folder his holding and sits down on his desk. "He can walk now with crutches easily yes... but... going up and down... walking building to building to classes...." doctor shakes his head

"I'm just here to visit, babe." Cheolie says caressing your back. "To report my health to him... to let know the team..."

"Oh."

"I'm sorry..." he press his lips together and giving you an apologetic look.

"I'll leave you two to talk... I have to go on a meeting now in the faculty. Just let the nurse know when you leave okay? So she can assist you with the wheel chair."

"Okay, doc. Thank you."

And as soon as the doctor leaves and shut the door close behind him, Seungcheol immediately grabs you by the waist, pull you close to his body and leans in to fully kiss you.

It feels rushed at the beginning but as soon as you find the perfect spot to lean your body weight to his, it felt smooth and just sensational. You even opened your mouth completely to let his tongue explore you.

You two haven't kissed for awhile. The rent is due.

"I missed you so much." He whisper as he pulls away to take a breather.

"This is the longest we've been away from each other..." you say as you straighten your stand

"Yeah... I got busy healing..."

"And I got busy at school... and at home..." you answer as you sit down beside him. "How are you feeling at the moment?"

"Good....well.. better now that I've kissed you." He smirks and plants a tiny kiss on your temple

"Babe..." you lean on his shoulder

"You know you always make me feel good..." he chuckles. "Also... Doc said my leg is healing pretty good..."

"That's good to hear..." you stand up once again. "So... can I--"

And before you could ask him another question about visiting him soon at home Seungcheol kisses you on your cheek and then on the back of your hand.

"Thank you for always calling me... every night... making sure to check on me... give me updates at school and being an understanding girlfriend. Even though you are tired yourself."

"I didn't do that much." You say holding his hand. "If only I could visit you personally I would..."

But you couldn't. It's not like he leaves far away from you. It's just that you wanted him to just rest. You know how he is when he sees you. He gets excited and acts everything is fine even though he is in pain.

He would probably force himself to get up when you visit him. It's kind og his thing to show off he is strong. Especially to you. He is your alpha lover.

"No...babe. just you calling has saved me from a lot of bad moods and not doing my therapies because... I'm not in the mood." He kisses your hand again.

"Well I'm glad... I could help..." you say smiling.

"And also..." he then bites his lower lip whilst smiling. You already know what he's about to say with those cheeky smirks.

"Hush..." you cover his mouth with your hand, scared that he might say it outloud and the nurse from behind the door might hear. "That's for us only..." you whisper.

He is referring to the video call sessions you do every now and then. To help him when he is... sad and horny.

"You promised... no one should know..."

"Of course..." he murmurs, his mouth is still covered by your hand. "The images are for my eyes to see and for my dick to feel only." He adds and then playfully licks your palm, making you jump a little.

"Hey!" You slap him on his shoulder

He is grinning so much. He is enjoying your reactions. "You're so adorable being shy..." he puts his arm around your waist, securing you between his legs. "My shy little fairy..." he mumbles just before he kisses you again.

You don't deny him of any sort of making out. Even at the clinic. Why woulf you? You missed him so bad too.

So bad that even his hands is skimming your body and even lifting your short A-Line skirt, exposing your bum, just to squeeze it is fine. Perfectly fine.

"Wait." He pauses and looks you in the eyes. "You are wearing a skirt this short... with no protective shorts under?"

"Hmm?" You look at him, confused for a second. "Oh."

He is yout alpha, yes. And one trait of him that is very dominant is him being protective of you. He does not like anyone hurting you, being mean to you and most especially drooling over you. You are his and only his.

"What you mean oh?" He raises a brow. "Well? Why aren't you wearing one?"

You don't have a good excuse. You just forgot. Well... you have been forgetting since he have been away.

"Y/N..."

"You're now calling me by name...." you move back away a little. "I'm sorry... I have no excuse..."

"What if some maniac sees you? When you go up stairs? Or the elevator in the media building? You know its glass right? They can see... what if wind blows and..." he sighs, frustrated. "You know how most guys are."

"I know... I'm really sorry." You pout. "I didn't purposely forget it..."

You see the change in his mood. He is very possessive of you so you know that just the idea of any guy looking at you because they find you cute or have interest of being close to you and whatever, he's already on guard.

He sighs again and also he's already grabbing his crutches.

"Leaving already?" You say in the softes tone.

"Yeah..." he stands up and calls on the nurse for assistance.

"Okay..." you lower your gaze.

You are not sure how to tame your boyfriend since this time you know you are at fault for forgetting and breaking a promise you told him after he was told to stay at home.

You stand up and sling your bag over your shoulder. "Just... call me when you get home."

"I will not call you." He says as he sits down on the wheel chair. "You're coming home with me."

"Wait. What?" You ask

The nurse enters the room and greets the two of you.

"Ready to go home?" The nurse asks

"Yes." Seungcheol smiles at her. "I have a scheduled therapy this afternoon..."

"Oh... I see... goodluck then." She says as she helps to push your boyfriend

"Y/N..." he calls your name out again.

This is the second time he called you by name. He is clearly not okay with the skirt situation. This never happened before.

***

You both arrived at his parent's house. They welcomed you and hugged you even. They thanked you for being a support system for their son even though physically you can't come because, well, they know how their son acts around you.

It's not a secret that their son is so in love with you that he's very clingy and trying to act cool and such.

"I already made food for the two of you so just reheat it if you decide to eat later."

"Oh. Thank you Mrs. Choi." You say

"It's nothing dear... also... thank you for being his care taker for tonight... we will enjoy our night on out staycation at the city." His mother says

You are stunned to hear what Mrs. Choi just said. You can't react beside just smiling and nodding. "Ah... ahm... don't worry about us... I'm going to take good care of him."

"Thank you, again." Mr. Choi says.

"We'll get going now... see you tomorrow afternoon, dear." She says to her son who is sitting in the sofa drinking his cola.

"Have fun, Mom and Dad!" He waves at them

And as soon the door shuts and you hear the car engine from outside.

"What the fuck was that?" You stomp you way towards him. "Care taker... tonight?? Babe?"

Nonchalantly he answers. "You will be staying for the night here with me... until tomorrow..."

"Why?"

"Why not?" He looks at you with a coldest stare. "Do you have any other plans? Are you meeting with anyone?"

"No..."

"And then... stay...."

"But... my parents..."

"I already told them... they are fine with it."

"When?"

"I called them earlier... before I texted you to come to the clinic."

You are in complete shock. "Cheolie..." you whine

"Now, you're calling me by name?" He raises a brow. "Why are you acting like that? It's like you don't want to stay with me."

"That's not it."

"Then what?"

You sigh. You are lost for words.

Yes you should be happy you are spending time with your boyfriend but he could've told you. You would say yes if he asked or told you.

You are just stunned maybe or confused with him doing this too since he's been being snappy at you since earlier.

"Whatever." You mumble throwing your bag to the floor and just sitting down at the chair opposite of where he's sitting.

Now you are the one in the bad mood.

"I still have the clothes and undergarments you left from last time..." he then says in a much calmer tone.

"Okay." You answer not looking at him.

You are not mad at him. You are just not happy with what he did. He probably wanted to surprise you with the idea earlier but since it got ruined during your clinic make out session. Now things are...

"Babe." He calls you

You turn your head to look at him. He looks serene now.

"Can you please come here..." he says

You get up and make your way to him, to sit down beside him.

"Not there." He says holding on to your wrist and leading you to move somewhere else. "Here..." he gestures for you to sit on top of him.

"But... your leg..."

"I can manage..." he breathes and then tugs you down so he could kiss you, cupping your face with one hand.

Your hands are now on his chest for balance support. You tried pulling away from the kiss but

"Sit..." he says in between the kiss.

And you do as he says. Kneeling down on the sofa, legs spread between his thighs, you sit down on him and slowly put your arms around his neck.

"Cheolie..." your lips part ways as you spoke and he tries to chase the kiss again but you bite your lips together. "Wait..."

"Why...?" He pouts

"What are you doing?"

"What do you mean?" He runs his hands from your legs to your thighs and then underneath your skirt.

"You were just so cold to me... not even talking to me like I'm your girlfriend... and now you're kissing me and touching me..."

He throws his head back for a second and then sighs. "Babe, I'm sorry.... I was... well..."

"I said I'm sorry about the skirt... Don't worry. I will just wear pants starting on monday...."

"You sure?"

"Yeah... I promise." You kiss the tip of his nose. "I will just wear skirts when I'm with you."

"Really?" He raises a brow with matching smirk, biting his lower lip.

"Yeah..." you move your hips forward knowing what this tiny move will do to him. "I know you like to have easy access with me when we're together..." you softly say

He grunts as he feel you move a bit more. Rocking your hips over his erection that's sort of protected by his black jogging pants.

"I know what you're doing..." he hums

"And I know you like... what I'm doing..."

His smile goes ear to ear. "You're lucky I can't stand on my own yet... If I could..."

"What will you do?"

"Carry you over my shoulders and spread you on top of my bed..."

"And...?" You put your forehead to his.

"And...fuck you 'till dawn..."

Just the thought made you horny and wanting him. But since he can't do what he usually does to you, you decide to handle this on your own.

"You can still fuck me..." you say, grinning. "We have all night till tomorrow to find a way... a position you want me to be in."

"Fucking hell, babe." He grunts, sounding excited and turned on.

You adjust your position, making sure you can access him easily. Him meaning his long veiny length that's already leaking.

"Shit! Ah!" His mouth drops the second you hold onto him. His eyebrows is showing how he's loving the way you stroke and pump him. "Babe..." he moans. "Babe... aaaaahhh..." he throws his head back, his hands on his hair, trying to hold on to reality coz he is floating in heaven right now.

"Should I... let the tip touch me?"

"Touch... you?" He looks at you, brows furrowed from the high.

You already removed your panties off without him noticing.

"Yes... like this...." you then adjust your position back on top of him and lowered yourself just enough for the tip of his dick feel your entrance.

"Babe, fuck!" He snarls throwing his head back. "Your so damn wet already..."

You let him feel the wetness for awhile before you ease him in you.

"Holy... shiiiiit!"

"Ngggeeeaaah..." you breathe in as you suck him in whole.

"You're doing great babe." He pushes the hair off your face. "Don't rush it... just... feel it... feel me..."

When he's completely in you, you didn't move. You just hugged your man and took a breather.

"I can't believe my little fairy is being so daring..."

"Because I want to give you what you want... what you need..." you mumble on his neck.

"Babe, you know I can wait till I'm healed and ready to fuck you..."

"I know..." you look him in his eyes, "but I miss it too..."

"You do?"

You nod. "Us video calling... while we... you know... is not enough... I thought it was enough... but when I saw you earlier... I really did missed you more than I can imagine."

"You miss my dick?" He tease

"Babe!" You hide your face on his neck again.

"Ugh..." he suddenly moans. "Wow. I didn't know you get tigher when I tease you."

Seungcheol starts to move his hips a little, to ease dipper into you.

"Ah..." you exhale shakily. "Cheolie...hmmm...."

"You like that?"

"I do."

Then you start to move yourself.

You leaned back a little, pushing forward and pulling backward in motion to meet his slow but deep thrusting.

"Cheolie..." you cry his name as you feel like reaching your climax.

"Just let it go..."

"Fuck!" You throw your head back, panting and shaking. "Come with me..." you say, "come....with me..." you clentch more down there, making him feel the tightness.

"But babe..." biting on his lips, hissing and trying to control himself. "We don't have condoms."

"I don't care." You lean in for a sloppy kiss. "Come with me. I need to see you... melt with me..."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes."

"Babe..."

"Please..." you beg, "I want to feel it..."

"Fuck it!" He snarls as he goes to squeeze your ass under your skirt as he picks up the pace with you

It's amazing how strong he is. Even with an injured leg he could lift his hips to meet yours.

"Aaah!!" You moan as loudly as you can as you felt something in you pop.

He growls as soon as feel his length starts to release and feel the warmth in you.

"Fuck babe..." he is panting. "Our first time you being on top..."

Embarassed after your orgasm, you hug your man and hide your face again. "I only did what I know and can..."

"You did amazing... your handjob is what I needed to get me into the a frenzy." Then he kisses the top of your head. "I fucking love you... whatever you do... makes me love you even more..."

"I love you too..." you go for a kiss again. But then burst into a giggle when you felt him move. "You are still in me... I can feel you."

A smile spread over his lips, "Maybe we should continue this on my bed. I can do other positions and pump more in you if you want."

You grin, blushing. "I'd love to."

#yuyu1024 #scoups fluff #scoups fanfic #scoups x you #scoups x reader #scoups smut #seungcheol svt #seventeen seungcheol #seungcheol fanfic #seungcheol x reader #seungcheol smut #svt smut #svt seungcheol #scoups scenarios #kpop fanfiction #kpop smut #seventeen smut #svt imagines #seventeen imagines #seungcheol fluff

[d3adlyromb3ar]

✩ ‧₊˚ ✩。devil, meet angel

— pairing. choso x fem!reader

— synopsis. you were sent to exorcize him. upon meeting him, you can’t bring yourself to go through with it.

— word count. 2.2k

— warnings. angst, self hate, mental health issues, mentions of death, fluff, hurt/comfort, jjk violence, injuries, slight gore, suicidal ideation, choso just being a sweet boy we love him

main masterlist

You didn’t know what to think of him as he sat from afar, playing checkers with himself. It was both confusing and intriguing, and it pulled you closer towards him. Footsteps quiet and calculated.

If you were anything— it was stealthy. You could come and go as if you were never there, undetected like a ghost. Perhaps that’s how you got the nickname.

The Ghost.

His pale skin glowed, the porcelain like surface perfect— no flaws to be seen. The intricate markings among his face, complimenting the dark purple bags under his eyes. In an odd way— he was quite beautiful. Too beautiful to be a curse.

Almost as if he sensed you, his head slowly raised from the board and his eyes locked with yours.

The sudden realization that you had been caught watching— you felt glued to your spot. Staying as incredibly still— hoping you’d blend in with your environment. But at last, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes squinted upon your watchful gaze.

You were prepared to exorcize him, energy pulsing beneath your palms— the buzzing sensation itching to release. With calculated steps, you inched closer to the man.

Your first step had his eyes squinting even more, his expression mostly unchanging.

Why was I approaching this curse? I should exorcize it immediately— no questions. You thought.

Keeping your steps even and slow— you had made it closer to him. Standing a good ten feet away. Looking into his eyes, now that you were closer— you were shocked to find such emotion within them.

You weren’t even sure if he knew how expressive his eyes were.

Swallowing nervously all of a sudden, you raised your chin— false confidence.

“You know why I’m here.” You started.

Somewhere in the back of your mind wondered why you were creating small talk with something you were meant to exorcize. Maybe it was simply a way to make exorcising curses more interesting— or perhaps it was the way he didn’t show any signs to fight.

The man looked you up and down, his face stuck on a neutral— almost bored expression. But his eyes, they spoke for him.

“Guess I do.” He responded, his voice low and gravelly.

You felt an awkward tug at your chest— unsure of what more to say. Unsure if you should exorcize him without another word.

“Just like that? Thought you’d at least put up a fight.” You wondered out loud.

Your words had the man tilting his head, the checkers forgotten below him as he stood suddenly. His height making itself know, the distinct difference— that if he were to approach you now— he’d be towering over you.

“Why bother… at last I’ll be with my brothers.” He revealed.

His words were shocking, very human of him. It had your chest aching with hurt. Hurt for him.

“Your… your brothers?” You wondered, already having a suspicion.

The man closed his eyes for a moment before opening them to stare you down. His jaw set, his eyes furious but broken.

“They’re dead, because of your friends.” He spoke carefully.

Your heart throbbed painfully in your chest, the shame filling your body as you began to beat yourself up for something you didn’t do. But you couldn’t help but feel at fault.

The man noticed the twitch in her brow, the way her mouth turned down from his words. Her reaction was intriguing to him— wondering why she was taking so long to end him once and for all.

Loss was something you knew well— an unfortunate feeling that lingered amongst your entire life. It was only natural to feel for others that had to experience it as well. Which was why you found yourself speaking your next words to him.

“I’m sorry.”

The man stared at you in confusion, studying your expression. He was slightly disgusted to find your reaction genuine. But why?

“Wh-what…” He trailed off.

You closed your hands into fists, trying to restrain the energy you had previously built up. Desperate to bury it within you until it deem useful.

“Your brothers. I’m sorry you had to lose them.” You spoke quietly, unsure if you had a place to be sorry for him.

His eyes narrowed at you, his own hands tightening into fists now. But as you gazed upon him, and took in his body language— you still could not find any aggression.

Meanwhile, the man was confused why you— a sorcerer— was sending him your condolences. Was it confusion he felt within him, or was it appreciation?

That would be twisted— apologizing for something your friends were at fault of. He wanted to think, but couldn’t find it in himself to.

He could only nod in thanks, choosing he to stay silent as he got lost in his own thoughts. All surrounding you.

Suddenly, the guilt sensation began to wash over you in such a way you felt physically dirty. Your skin itched— your hands clammy as you kept them squeezed tight. The realization of what you were about to do— to someone who was mourning. Someone who clearly wasn’t exactly a curse. It was only the same reminder you’d get after every mission.

Who was the real monster?

You shivered with the thought that echoed loudly within you, and you held an opened hand to your chest. In hopes your heart would slow.

The man just watched, his eyes drinking in the scene before him. Wondering why you were in such a distraught state all of a sudden. It was the concern that bubbled within him, that had him clenching his jaw.

You turned and began to walk away, not uttering another word as you just needed to escape to hiding.

“Where are you going…” He muttered, loud enough for you to hear.

He knew you did, with how your body tensed and slowed their steps. Luckily, you turned to the side, able to look him in the eye.

“Forget that this ever happened. I never saw you, you never saw me.” You explained, voice shaky.

The man looked at you in confusion, in disbelief that you were sparing him— letting him live another day. That same foreign feeling washes through him, and suddenly his gaze was softening.

“I don’t understand.” He wondered out loud again.

You shook your head, forcing a smile that didn’t reach your eyes.

“You don’t need to.” You said lately, before turning away from him again.

This time you didn’t turn back around, and you kept walking with hurried steps until you found yourself crouched in a dark alley. Allowing the guilt to finally begin to eat away at you.

A part of you enjoyed this hell— a part of you feeling like you deserved such pain.

Meanwhile, Choso was trying to understand your reaction. He was hellbent on figuring out why you left, allowing him to live.

What a strange girl you are. He thought.

The small interaction between you and the man replayed in your mind. Causing you to be more distracted than usual, causing you to doubt your abilities— your purpose as a sorcerer. As of lately, it didn’t feel right. Exorcising curses didn’t feel satisfying.

Your mind wasn’t in the right place, and that’s how you ended up crawling away from the destruction of the battle. Bleeding out as you had let the curse you just exorcised, get the jump on you.

With agonizing pain, you eventually crawled your way far enough from the damage. Letting your form lean back against a brick wall. It was then you could assess yourself.

The open wound on your side was the most painful, the harsh throbbing— the sensation of the blood oozing out. It had you sweating, chest rising and falling quickly in attempts to stay conscious. You could feel the left side of your face start to burn, raising fingers to trace the outline of a cut. Starting from just above your eyebrow, dipping straight through the hairs and stopping just near your eye.

You hissed as your fingers pressed too hard on a tender spot.

Your body felt weak, exhausted as it racked up all the minor cuts and bruises— the weight of your injuries causing your eyes to droop.

This was it? Where was my phone? I should probably call for help. You thought helplessly.

Through all the pain, the questions that flew through your mind— one thought stuck out the most.

Maybe I deserved to die.

It was a sick way to be thinking, knowing how selfish it would be to give up now. People needed saving, they needed your help. But it felt impossible to find strength— any strength to keep your eyes open.

Your hand stayed tightly pressed against the wound on your side, desperate to keep the blood from oozing for however long you could. Your eyes were unfocused and staring at the ground.

There was no worse way to die, than dying alone.

Before you could drown in that thought, footsteps were heard approaching. Immediately you tensed up, glancing up quickly at your attacker.

Your breath got caught in your throat at the sight of… him again.

The same man who had taken up your headspace.

During your shock at seeing him, Choso gave himself a moment to study you. You were obviously hurt and in pain, your body battered to a pulp. He couldn’t understand why he felt so bad for you— someone who almost killed him.

You couldn’t help but stay tense, feeling like a cornered animal— waiting for your predator to attack. But as before, the man made no indication that he was going to hurt you. Instead, he squatted down in front of you— not missing the way you flinched back at his sudden closeness.

“You’re hurt.” He stated, as if it wasn’t obvious.

You couldn’t find it in yourself for a snarky comeback, not when you felt this defeated.

“W-why? What are yo- I—”

“You’re hurt, allow me to help you.” He interrupted your babbling.

Your eyes were painted in confusion, your features twisting into uncertainty. Everything about this didn’t feel right, you should’ve pushed him away and allow yourself to die instead. But you couldn’t control the way your body relaxed, your head bowing in submission.

“My name is Choso. What’s yours?” He asked, his hands ripping a part of your jacket off, creating a long bandage like strand.

You swallowed, taking a deep breath in before responding.

“I-It’s (Y/n).” You rasped out, the taste of iron coating your tongue suddenly.

Choso snuck a quick glance to you at the reveal of your name. (Y/n)… he quickly realized he liked it.

He gently snuck the jacket strand behind the dip of your lower back, tying it tightly around your wound. The sensation had you whining, teeth digging into your bottom lip as you tried to conceal your cries. The pain had washed over your body with such intensity, you felt like you were going to faint.

“Please, keep your eyes open.” He instructed, moving his attention from your side to the cut on your face.

Without realizing it, he was letting his fingers caress around the wound. You gasped at the feeling, the pads of his fingers rough in texture— but he brushed over your skin with such delicacy.

“Why are you helping m-me?” You rasped out, coughing from the tightness of your lungs.

Choso let his eyes drop from your cut to your eyes, gazing into yours with confusion. Mainly because he wasn’t quite sure why he was helping you— he just knew he had to.

“I don’t know.” He answered truthfully.

You furrowed your brows, but couldn’t dwell on his words too long— not when your body seized and twitched for a moment. This particular wave of pain hitting you harder than the rest.

Choso watched you with an intensity in his eyes, and he almost grew distracted by another unfamiliar sensation in his chest. Concern? For this sorcerer?

“I don’t deserve your help… but thank you.” You whispered, body slowly relaxing after the pain subsided for now.

“You spared me. Call this me, returning the favor.” He stated.

Although, he wasn’t sure if that was the main reason why he was saving you.

You attempted to shoot him a weak smile, but when he noticed a drop of blood escaping from the corner of your lips— he couldn’t find it in himself to return the gesture.

“Well… I appreciate it.” You mumbled out.

Choso could sense you losing consciousness, and he knew he had to get you more medical attention. He wasn’t going to let you die here— not today.

As your eyes finally dropped, your body slumping with fatigue— Choso didn’t waste another second. He scooped up your fragile form, carrying you bridal style to find some help.

His steps were quick and rushed, the sight of you laying in his arms causing another sensation to bloom in his chest. You looked so peaceful. So… pretty— like an angel. He found it odd for him to think such things.

All he knew was that the next thought he had, was leaving him the most confused he’d ever been.

He never wanted to let you out of his sight again.

— ending notes. this was in my drafts for awhile, and it’s just something random i wrote. had a dream similar to this 😇☁️ also apologies for any spelling mistakes!

#jjk #anime #jujutsu kaisen #angst with a happy ending #fic rec #choso #choso my beloved #choso kamo #jjk choso #jujutsu kaisen choso #choso x reader #choso x you #choso x y/n #choso fluff #choso x female reader #hurt/comfort #jjk x reader

[idkwhatever580]

More than you’ll ever know

[{pairings: Natasha romanoff x reader}]

{prompt- Natasha comes home from a long mission to find y/n curled up in her hoodie.}

(she/her pronouns I might use they/them in the mix as well. Just whatever I write lol)

[|warnings~ cursing probably. Tad bit of angst not a lot but lots of fluff|]

An; I actually hope this turns out good bc idk what to do if y’all hate it. It’s probably gonna be cringey but I live for that anyways sooo hope y’all enjoy!

————————————————————————————————————————

Nobody’s pov?

Natasha walks into her room and sets her duffel bag down on the floor with a sigh. She immediately looks around for her girlfriend and frowns.

“What the fuck?” She mumbles tiredly.

She takes a good look at her room and sees everything a mess. Trash and clothes everywhere. The sheets are a stray and the floor is covered in dirty laundry. Natasha huffs.

All she wanted was to come home from her week long mission to her girlfriend and the least she expected was a clean room.

She quickly realizes that y/n isn’t in their room and she decides to leave the cleaning for later and switches over to the task of finding her beloved.

She steps into the hallway and says “Friday? Where is y/n/n”

“Mrs. Y/n is in the third floor lounge room ma’am.” The ai quickly replies.

She mumbles a quick thank you and starts her trek to find her girlfriend.

Natasha steps in the elevator and Friday already knows where she wants to go so it starts moving. Natasha stretches her aching muscles a bit and the bell dings.

She steps out to find the lounge in a similar state as their room except for there is a mound of blankets on the couch. She smiles knowing that the amount of blankets y/n uses is unreasonable but cute.

She silently walks to y/n’s pile and slowly uncovers her one layer at a time.

Y/n’s Pov

I am sleeping in the lounge and I feel my blankets being torn away from me.

Okay maybe torn is a bit dramatic but hey I am the girl I’ve always been.

I quickly grab the hand that is above my face to stop them from touching me. Although my eyes are closed I grip their wrist tightly and say,

“If you so dare say one word I’ll have Natasha beat your ass when she gets home”

I hear a familiar chuckle and my eyes open widely and I see my girlfriend. I immediately jump over the edge of the couch into her arms and she says,

“Are you gonna make me beat myself up?”

I glare at her as I pull away from the embrace and then I look around and finally realize how bad it’s gotten.

Usually whenever Natasha leaves I can handle myself but sometimes my mental health gets worse and I find myself unable to get out of bed. So that’s where this has gotten me.

I look at Natasha and she has a concerned look on her face and she says,

“Де��ка, what’s all this?”

I suddenly break and tears start welling up. I feel awful for having her come home to a depressed mess like me. I quickly try to give her an explanation.

“I don’t know! I- I just stopped picking things up and then next thing I know it’s a whole depression room”

I hide myself in her neck and a few tears fall, but she comforts me and says,

“Oh, Детка, you always know you can ask anybody in the compound for help. Don’t just lock yourself up. Come on. Let’s go to our room and get you in a bath.”

I look down and nod my head. Instead of making me walk she carries me like a koala and I hang onto her tightly.

She gets a bath running and helps me in and then I say,

“You’re not getting in with me?”

She smiles and looks down at me and says,

“I’m gonna do something really quickly okay? I’ll be right back just relax.”

I pout but nod my head nevertheless knowing she probably has to go give some paperwork to Nick or something like that.

After about 10 minutes she comes back in and I smile at her.

“You’re such a cutie”

I say to her. She sits down on the toilet next to me and smiles and says,

“I’m the cutie?”

I nod my head and explain further,

“You’re so baby girl. Like. Just cutie pie.”

Natasha chuckles a bit. Oh god. How her laugh makes me blush. Even after two years of dating she never fails to give me butterflies.

“I don’t think I’ve ever been called cute before… most people would say that I’m quite the opposite.”

I pout at her words and quickly quip,

“Well then, I guess most people don’t know you and that’s literally so tragic because if I never met you I don’t know what I’d do.”

She smiles at me and says,

“Why don’t we get you out and let’s watch some movies?”

I hum and get out. She helps me dry off even though I protest she doesn’t let me do it myself, so I just let her do her own thing.

She gets me my favorite pjs and we go to the room and I freeze.

Everything is gone and cleaned. All the trash. All the clothes. I look to Natasha and say,

“Did you do this?”

She shrugs her shoulders and says,

“Maybe I did. Maybe I didn’t.”

I roll my eyes and give her a kiss on the cheek. We get into the bed with fresh sheets on them and I immediately cuddle into her side. She goes for the remote and I shake my head and say,

“I just wanna lay here with you. No tv. No nothing. Just us”

She smiles and nods her head and says,

“I like that idea. I love you.”

I smile and kiss her softly. Deliberately avoiding saying ‘I love you’ back to her knowing it’s a pet peeve.

She pouts and I find it so cute and she says,

“Say I love you back.”

I look at her and say,

“Why?”

She fake gasps and says,

“You have to if you love me! Do you not love me?”

I shrug my shoulders and say,

“Maybe I do. Maybe I don’t.”

She pouts at me using her words against her and she says,

“You’re mean.”

I look at her and decide to be nice again so I say,

“And you’re the smartest, kindest, most loving, cutest, person on this earth. I love you so so much more than you’ll ever know.”

She blushes and smiles at me. I look at her and say,

“I’m sleepy”

Then as if on queue, a big yawn comes out from me, and Natasha giggles a bit. She snuggles closer to me if that’s even possible and says,

“Sleep baby. You’ll need your energy for tomorrow”

I groan when I remember that Natasha and I are training together. I’ve gotten out of training with everyone else this past week knowing they’d never make me do anything since Natasha romanoff is my girlfriend, but she won’t let it slide.

I decide to worry about it tomorrow and just focus on the fact that my baby is home and all is well in the world. Even if it isn’t.

——————————————————————————

An: I hope y’all like it! It’s a bit long but I couldn’t find a good place to finish it. And I wanted to add more lol. Please please please leave some constructive criticism for me lol. I need to work on my writing I’m sure. And feel free to leave requests anywhere :)))

#fanfic #avengers #marvel #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha x reader #natasha romanoff

[sarafinamk]

Fallen Angel (Smiling Critters Space Riders AU Reader Insert) Part 4

Summary: Bobby has been dealing with a lot of guilt ever since you went into rehab. Now that you're finally getting released, she's determined to make it up to you.

Two chapters in one day! Let's go! Check out the other parts here. The Smiling Critters Space Riders AU belongs to @onyxonline. Enjoy!

TW: Mentions of Blood, Mentions of Injury, Trauma, Death mentions, Mentions of assassination attempts, Religious Trauma, Religious Imagery and Symbolism, Religious Cults, Mentions of Drug Addiction, Self harm Attempt, Mention of Suicide Attempt, Mental Health Issues, Brief Anxiety Attack, Slight cursing, LOTS of negative thoughts, Implied Abuse, Conditioning

----------

Bobby woke up and shot herself out of bed before her alarm could finish its first beep. She puts on her uniform, goes through her usual routine, and finishes by the time everyone else wake up. The other riders exchange worried glances amongst each other but they say nothing to Bobby.

Today’s the day the riders pick you up from the treatment center so you can continue to serve your sentence with them. Sure, serving your sentence in the same station where they kept the other prisoners would seem like the obvious choice, if you were any other enemy to the galaxy, that is. But the fact is, you’re not, and Commander Ludwig isn’t sure just how many more break-ins he and the medical staff are able to handle.

Of course, word would get around that the Prototype’s archangel was being confined at HQ’s treatment center. To no one’s surprise, anyone with a vendetta and a craving for bloodshed, would try to find you and your cell. You never got hurt, at least. No extra security measures are enough to dissuade them it seems.

Bobby gets herself situated in the cockpit, glancing back and forth between the starry scenery, the clock on the wall, and the navigation tab open in front of Dogday. She sighs while absent-mindedly bouncing her leg hard enough to turn the couch into a massage chair.

“Are you sure you want to come with us, Bobby?” Dogday’s concerned voice pulls her out of her thoughts. “It’s okay if you want to stay behind while we get (Y/n). There’s no pressure. I’m sure they’ll understand.”

Bobby gives her best reassuring, confident smile.

“Dogday, I appreciate your concern, but I can’t avoid (Y/n) forever. I have to face them eventually. And I really do want to see them.”

There is a brief moment of silence before Dogday sighs, nods, and goes back to piloting the ship. Bobby goes back to glancing out the window, her smile quickly disappearing.

She didn’t lie. She really wanted to visit you. Just once. Everyone else has visited you at least a few times, but Bobby couldn’t even find the courage to visit you after what happened in your old prison cell. None of her teammates held it against her, but she sure as heck did. She's a trained medic for crying out loud! She shouldn't have been acting hysterical the way she was, especially when you needed her the most. She's dealt with blood and injuries before. She's dealt with a few mentally unstable cultists during her time as a Space Rider. She's even helped out people in similar situations like you before.

No!

She has to remember that she may not have been much help during such a critical moment, but help came to you on time. You’re surrounded by trained medics and from what the other riders have told her, you’ve been recovering well in the treatment center. That's what matters!

Part of her, however, still holds onto the fear that if she visited your cell, she would find you all bloody and on the edge of death again. Some nights, she would have nightmares about that.

What if it happens today?

Soon enough, they arrive at the Space Station. Straightening her uniform and taking a deep breath, Bobby follows Dogday into the station. Thankfully, the treatment center was close to the hangars. It made the transporting of the injured easier for everyone.

The pair stop at the entrance. Dogday looks back at Bobby with a reassuring smile, gesturing back to the hangars. Bobby returns the smile, more sincere and determined this time. She shakes her head and stares at the neon sign above the entrance. She is going to see you today and she will not back down.

Not this time nor any time going forward.

Dogday nods in understanding, and the pair make their way inside. They check in and wait which didn't take long. Dogday sees you first, and greets you warmly. Bobby turns to where her captain was looking and there you were.

You walk out the hallway with two riders and a doctor. Bobby frowns upon seeing the handcuffs on you. She hated the idea of you being locked in a cell while needing to be hospitalized. Sure, you’ve done terrible things, and you served a terrible being, but you must’ve had a good reason. Call her crazy but she believes there is some good in you.

The riders hand Bobby your bag and stand at attention while the doctor and Dogday discuss your treatment plan going forward. Bobby tries to pay attention, but finds herself too busy staring at you. In her defense, how can she not? She's seeing you for the first time in six months.

She was ACTUALLY seeing you without any bandages, bruises, cuts, or that awful mask you always wore. For the first time, Bobby is seeing the real you, the one everyone called the Archangel. Her teammates were right about you. Not only do you look healthier, but you just look...

Beautiful.

Like...

REALLY beautiful.

You glance her way, and she smiles and waves (albeit very awkwardly). You nod in her direction and turn your focus back to the conversation between Dogday and the doctor.

Oh god, this is awkward.

After a brief exchange of thank you's and goodbyes from both sides, Bobby and Dogday quickly escort you back to the ship.

----------

You internally breathe a sigh of relief the moment you entered the Space Riders’ ship. You weren’t sure how much longer you could handle all those eyes glancing your way. You were waiting for someone to come out of the shadows some way and finish you off just like those intruders that try to break into your cell.

Now that thought made you tense up again despite it being only you and the eight Space Riders in this ship. You couldn't sense any other energies in the ship, but that didn't ease your racing mind one bit. Who knows what the Space Riders will do to you now that they are not forced to follow social protocols?

You still have those damn power mufflers on you. Sure, that shouldn't stop you from fighting, but not only are you surrounded by four riders who have celestial powers, but you're surrounded by four non-celestial riders who, unfortunately, handle themselves well in combat. Unless you can outsmart all eight of them and break your power mufflers in the process, you don't see yourself winning this fight. It's best to be smart about all this.

"Okay, so, first things first, welcome back, (Y/n). We're happy that you're here with us," the Captain begins while clasping his hands together, making you stand straight at full attention. "It's okay, relax. It's just introductions. Nothing formal."

You're not sure if this is supposed to be a test or not, but you would rather not risk failing it when you just got here. You continue to stand at full attention, waiting for the Captain to continue. The Captain sighs, and clears his throat before continuing

"Anyways, I know there's a lot to do and discuss, and you probably have some questions. Don't worry, we'll get to that in time. But since this is your first day back, I think it would be best to try and get you settled in. I can show you where you'll be staying and-"

"Actually," interrupted Bobby, "I can show (Y/n) where they'll be staying."

"Are you sure?" the Captain asks with hesitation in his voice.

"Don't worry about it. I'm sure."

The only response she is met with is silence. You wait for something to happen: an argument, physical discipline, a speech, or a fair sentence. You never saw the Captain incorporate the type of punishments that the Prototype did.

At least in public anyways.

But now that he is no longer in the public eye, you're not sure if you're ready to witness the truth for the first time, but you prepare yourself for it anyways. Instead, to your surprise, the first thing the Captain does is take the handcuffs off you, but not the power mufflers.

"Okay, if you're sure."

Bobby cheerfully thanks the Captain and escorts you to the direction of the prison cells. You reach the entrance leading to the prison cells, but Bobby just... passes it. Did she not pay attention to where she was going? Why is she passing it?

You want to ask, but you force yourself to keep quiet. She could be looking to punish you for making her suffer with your selfishness. That’s why she never visited you during your rehabilitation. Instead, she leads you to the riders’ sleeping quarters and into one sleeping quarter that you know was never occupied. All the furniture arranged was as you remember it from previous battles except the bed is now neatly made.

“Here we are. Your new room. It’s not much, but I think it’ll be a nice change of environment for you after being hospitalized for almost a year.”

Not much? This is a lot more than what you see in the sleeping quarters back home. This is much more than the cells you were in for the last several months. If this isn’t “much” to the heretics, then what does having a lot look like to them?

“Crafty and I made some clothes for you. She noticed you like having your head covered, so we made you a lot of hoodies.”

You silently take in every little detail of the room.

“This is all mine?”

“Yes, it is. We weren’t sure how you wanted your room decorated, but we’ll figure that out over time.” Why would it matter how you wanted to decorate this room?  At least the Space Riders are giving you, their prisoner, one in the first place. It’s selfish to ask for more than what you deserve. “Picky is making a special dinner to celebrate your recovery and coming back. I’ll come get you when it’s ready. I’ll leave you alone to get settled.” Bobby’s voice cuts off your thoughts, even when you don’t say anything. She smiles and makes her way to the door.

“Thank you,” you say suddenly. Bobby stops dead, turns to you slowly. Her eyes widen.

“What did you say?”

You clear your throat and straighten yourself up. “Considering the fact I’m your prisoner, this is a very generous accommodation.”

Bobby continues to stare at you, and you're questioning if you said the wrong thing already. Not even one hour into your return and you’re already making mistakes. Maybe she��ll change her mind and decide a cell is a more fitting place, but instead of her screaming, or silence and storming away from you, she smiles. “You're not our prisoner here, (Y/n). You're our guest. We want to help you get better. I’m just happy that you’re here with us.”

With that, you are left alone. You hastily dig into your bag which Bobby must have placed in the on the dresser. Thankfully, your journal and the books given to you by Bubba were still there.

You pull one of the drawers and they were full of very thick long-sleeved shirts with hoods. “Hoodies” as Bobby called them. But… which one are you supposed to wear? Bobby never specified which one was mandatory for you, and you couldn’t just ask. You would get punished for not knowing when it should be obvious. You grip the skin of your forearm tightly.

No.

No, no.

No, no, no.

Fight back the temptation to see red! You can’t risk being sent back again. Just take some deep breaths.

In…

Hold…

Out…

Repeat.

Just like the healers taught you. Soon enough, your grip loosens and thankfully, there was no sign of red.

You look back at the drawer of “hoodies.” Since the Space Riders wear white while off duty, then perhaps the white one would be your safest choice. You sigh, hoping that line of reasoning will hold true during mealtime. You relax more when the warmth and softness cover you. The best part was that hood covered your head. It was no mask, but it was better than having your entire head exposed. You were just relieved you no longer had to rely on those infirmary blankets to keep your body and head covered. At least there were no cameras installed in your accommodation… to your knowledge.

Since you had no orders given until mealtime, you decided to explore more of the room. Maybe if you are good, then living as a prisoner of the heretics won’t be so terrible. Maybe you will be able to survive Hell after all.

----------

Stay tuned for the next part "Burn Bright Until You Burn Out"

#smiling critters #poppy playtime dogday #dogday #poppy playtime catnap #poppy playtime smiling critters #poppy playtime 3 #poppyplaytime au #poppy playtime #poppy playtime chapter 3 #catnap #space riders au #smiling critters au #onyxriders #hoppy hopscotch #kickinchicken #picky piggy #bubba bubbaphant #craftycorn #bobby bearhug #platonic #x reader #smiling critters x reader #poppy playtime x reader #gn reader #reader insert #gender neutral reader #angst #hurt/comfort #recovery #platonic relationships

[comradekatara]

Can you go a bit more in depth about your post about Sokka in the Burning Rock episode? You said that it was basically his suicide mission, which I agree with. I'd really like to hear more of your thoughts on it.

okay yeah i mean i'm sure i've covered all these points before extensively because i love weaving a tapestry of sokka's fucked up psychological landscape more than anything in the world, but every so often someone will comment on one of my posts and be like "i think you're reaching i think sokka is the paragon of mental health actually" and i'm just like um. did we not all watch the boiling rock. did we just ignore the apotheosis of sokka's entire character arc. like katara's apotheosis in "the southern raiders" is both very overt and impactful and also, arguably, subtler than sokka's, because they don't explicitly spell out the themes every five seconds, but like. if you didn't watch the boiling rock then you cannot understand sokka. and weirdly enough i also believe that zuka shippers are the biggest culprit of this despite this episode being thee zucchini episode because they somehow still have the audacity to characterize sokka as "goofy sunshine who exists to comfort zuko" when like. the entire point is that sokka is legitimately suicidal here and zuko is doing everything in his power to support him thru what is quite literally a mental breakdown. like their relationship is legitimately interesting i don't understand how people have taken that and made it deeply boring.....but i digress.

the boiling rock is quite obviously sokka at his lowest. the worst thing that could ever happen to him – fumbling a mission that was squarely his responsibility, from its conception to its execution, due to not being able to sufficiently compartmentalize his emotions, leading to the mass imprisonment of most of his comrades, including the men of his tribe whom he idolized his entire life and felt immense pressure to live up to, including his father who he is deathly afraid of disappointing (for reasons that have nothing to hakoda being malicious or neglectful in any way, fwiw), and thus being directly implicated in the failure and the harm caused by said failure – happened. sokka is someone who is especially bad at dealing with failure, because a) he is exceptionally talented, and thus has less experience dealing with failure in both minor and major ways, and thus lacks the emotional resilience developed through the process of struggle and growth that normal people (such as, incidentally, zuko) go through and b) to sokka, whose primary desire at all times is to protect and provide for others in any way he possibly can, for someone else to sacrifice themselves for him constitutes a fundamental disruption to the order. there is a perverse wrongness to kya or yue or hakoda or suki making sacrifices on their own volition, because it means that sokka has existentially failed to protect them by martyring himself. like, he somehow feels so guilty about suki being imprisoned that when azula reveals this piece of information to him, it literally distracts him from his own mission. and mind you, there's absolutely no way sokka could have known or been responsible for suki's imprisonment. but he still feels guilty nonetheless. and azula knows that, knows exactly how to twist the knife to make him break, because, well, it's honestly pretty obvious.

sokka obviously cannot retroactively save his mother or his first girlfriend, but he can save his father and his current girlfriend. in "the awakening" aang says he has to restore his honor after the guilt and shame of his failure in ba sing se (aang is also an incurable gifted kid perfectionist, btw, as is azula. posts for another time...) and sokka repeats zuko's line again in this episode, after experiencing the guilt and shame of his failure during the eclipse. the driving motivation of zuko's entire character, feeling like he has failed in some ontological way and must therefore redeem himself or die trying, is reinforced through aang and sokka's respective experiences mirroring that drive. aang goes out in a storm and nearly drowns to redeem himself in some vague, nebulous way, because he isn't thinking rationally. and likewise sokka, who usually always has a plan and always thinks things through, feels that caution and foresight is pointless, because he came up with a genuinely brilliant invasion plan and it didn't work, so clearly there's something wrong with him (just as he always suspected) and no amount of planning even matters, because he's a capital F Failure and always will be. and so he vows to save his father, as he promised him he would when they parted on the day of black sun, or die trying, because if he can't even do that then what is he good for; at least he'll die a martyr, which to him, is basically his ideal situation. because to sokka, dying as a martyr is basically the highest form of fulfilling his purpose (being needed, protecting people) and so if he dies a martyr, then maybe his catastrophic failure (that is entirely his fault and rests squarely on his shoulders btw) can be forgiven. so his plan is basically just to sacrifice himself for his father so that he can die "redeemed." very normal, rational, healthy behavior, i would say.

sidenote, i also see people claim that "the boiling rock" makes sokka look stupid because why wouldn't he take any of the insanely talented benders to a prison in a giant volcano surrounded by a boiling lake, and it's like. sokka literally admits that he's not being rational, that he doesn't think he's going to survive this, that this is not a good idea. it would go against sokka's entire modus operandi if he brought the children who he feels a deep, presiding responsibility to protect on a suicide mission that he's lowkey hoping will fail (because he not so secretly loves courting death. it's like she's the moon or something). he only lets zuko come with him because he doesn't actually care whether zuko lives or dies at this point. sokka has absolutely no faith in zuko whatsoever (and frankly, why would he, zuko has yet to actually prove himself to him. he didn't even kill combustion man; sokka did) so he has no idea that zuko is actually going to be helpful and supportive in a meaningful way. and frankly, if he had known that at the beginning, or even remotely liked zuko as a person, he probably wouldn't have caved so easily when zuko invited himself to join. if he didn't think that zuko was objectively worse than him and basically worthless as a human being, i doubt he would have let himself be so vulnerable with zuko in the first place. meanwhile zuko is eating it up bc he's like "omg he's confiding in me he's letting me help him we're basically besties" because he doesn't actually know sokka well enough to realize that sokka doesn't actually do that shit with people he remotely respects. shit like "my first girlfriend turned into the moon" and "i had a feeling this was going to be a one way trip" are simply not things that sokka would say out loud 98% of the time. the fact that he is admitting something real is not a testament to the trust he places in zuko, but rather the opposite. sokka spilling his guts (you know, for him) to his resident collateral damage, sokka bringing his lovingly crafted space sword on this mission, sokka not even confirming whether or not his father is actually there beforehand – he's simply stopped giving a fuck, he doesn't care whether or not he lives to see another day, because to him, he has nothing left to lose.

but of course, that also isn't true at all. i mean, for one thing, zuko still needs to teach aang firebending, so he does serve a pretty important function to the group, and zuko simply telling him to do hot squats in his absence does not qualify as significant tutelage. but also, even more importantly, sokka is integral to the fabric of the group. when he's gone for a day in "sokka's master" they literally all just shut down and start complaining about how much they miss him (we don't actually see any b-roll of the gaang hanging around the western air temple because the episode is simply too busy for that, so who can say whether the same thing occurs twice). sokka cannot afford to simply die just because his first plan failed, he still has a major responsibility to his friends. fucking idiot. i've said before that sokka has the emotional resilience of like. a pathetic wet newborn kitten caught in the rain. but like, come on man. i mean, as someone who has also suffered from debilitating perfectionist issues and never had to be responsible for a failed military invasion that cost my people their freedom, i do get it, but still. not his best moment. although there is something genuinely admirable about the fact that after he finds suki, he decides that saving suki is enough, and genuinely does want to succeed in his mission going forward. like his love for suki is one of the only things that consistently makes him happy and makes him forget that his greatest dream in life is to be murdered, and that's so beautiful to me.

the entire point of this episode, by the way, is that sokka is wrong. if that isn't obvious. sokka's entire worldview, that he only has value insofar as he exists to provide for others, and if he fails to protect people in any capacity, he has fundamentally failed to uphold the one reason he even exists on this earth, and thus he does not deserve to exist unless he is bearing the weight of everyone's suffering or otherwise proving his worth through sacrificing himself for others, is um. fucking stupid???? and incorrect. and stupid. the thing is, unlike zuko, sokka can't really point to any one person who taught him to see himself this way. he can't just face his father and tell him that his abuse was cruel and wrong, because hakoda is a good father who has never not supported and believed in and encouraged him, done everything in his power to protect him, loved him unconditionally. hakoda has inadvertently damaged sokka's psyche in various ways, of course, but never with any intention to hurt him. like, ozai tried to kill zuko, on multiple occasions. it's a pretty obvious indicator of the primary source of harm in his life. but sokka is equally if not more Unwell, and there's no one single figure he can blame, because his complex lies within a tangled web of what my best friend fanon calls the "massive psychoexistential complex" of the colonized subject. he is being dehumanized not through interpersonal abuse, but through the violent logic of imperialism. sokka's formative traumas inform his psychology as he understands that he only has value insofar as he is protecting the people he loves (namely his sister) from being murdered by imperialists, much like his mother did. and that logic is continually reified through the violence he is being subjected to, until he truly absorbs the belief that his life has no value on its own, that he is genuinely Less than [human] in some fundamental way. which is obviously deeply tragic, but also lowkey kind of comical because he also happens to be the specialest boy in the world, who literally did come up with multiple working escape plans at the world's most secure supermax on the fly, mind you! but whenever anyone tries to point that out, including piandao literally saying "you're the most exceptional and worthy person i've ever met in my life" sokka is just like "um. that is incorrect actually." like NO ONE should depersonalize themselves and feel that their only value lies in their ability to serve and sacrifice themselves for others, but it's especially ironic that sokka literally does not think he has any value as a human being, and yet he is also objectively exceptional. like, do you understand why i adore this character so much. do you.

anyway. the point of this episode isn't that sokka has worth because he's exceptional, either. that's lowkey the point of "sokka's master," but also a) sokka doesn't really internalize it and b) the more important part of the episode lies in how much the gaang just misses his company because they miss their neurotic control freak big brother who makes bad jokes. but even if he couldn't come up with multiple working escape plans on the fly, suki and zuko still stay by his side anyway because they care about him. they are demonstrating that they would risk their safety and possibly even their lives, in the exact way that sokka is always trying to for everyone else, for him. that sokka doesn't need to be the one who always protects everyone else, and that he isn't a failure for letting people who care about him help him and protect him. and sokka has to accept their help, because suki and zuko are simply too stubborn not to force him into letting them support him. they are standing in a literal maximum security prison in the middle of a volcano and they are still choosing to prioritize sokka's mental health and wellbeing, which is honestly crazy, but also exactly what he needs in this moment. suki has known sokka for what, 3 days maximum? yes they're soulmates but like, girl get up. and in zuko's case, "girl get up" is magnified tenfold, because he literally risked his life to go with him to the boiling rock (also largely motivated by the guilt of not being able to stage his own prison break with iroh, but still!) and let himself get imprisoned despite being the fire nation's most wanted criminal, stayed by sokka's side no matter what including getting thrown into a literal torture chamber for him, jumped across a gaping boiling chasm with no guarantee that he'd survive except for the implicit expectation that sokka would catch him on the other side. like zuko is so fucking pussywhipped and sokka didn't even value him as a human being until like halfway through their entire mission. insane.

in conclusion: "the boiling rock" is a beautiful story of the most mentally ill boy on the planet (he took first place ever since jet died rip jet forever in our hearts), and his two ride or die bitches who he met like yesterday, and also his dad, and a casual homophobe named chit sang, all working together to demonstrate to him why killing yourself is a bad idea in most cases, probably. it's also the story of the most insane dyke drama of all time, but that's for another post (of which i have of course made multiple, most recently, here). i said it's the apotheosis of sokka's arc, and by that i mean it's the most overt acknowledgement of what his fundamental issue is, and the first steps one must take in actually resolving it (namely, accepting help and support from your peers and loved ones). do i think that sokka is magically cured after returning from the boiling rock? no, probably not (in fact, because i'm somewhat sick & twisted myself, i like to imagine that once the war ends, he actually gets worse). but he does seem genuinely happier after they return. and maybe that's just bc kyoshi warrior pussy hits different, but like. he was able to rely on others for help (including mai my best friend mai) who supported him unconditionally and prevented him from simply giving up, and that's so incredibly important. that kind of support is always important, to everyone, of course, but as we've established, it's especially important to sokka specifically, at his lowest (quite possibly ever), in this situation. no one has an obligation to risk their life for someone else, but sokka is something who thinks that his purpose is to risk his life for other people (namely katara), and so for people who really have nothing to gain and everything to lose in standing by and promising not to leave without him, to actually show that they support him unconditionally is huge. if sokka has no fans then i am dead and so is suki zuko hakoda toph aang piandao iroh the mechanist etc etc etc. perfect episode <3

#suicide / #writergracethepanda #asks #analysis #sokka #sokkaxsuki #cinematic masterpiece the boiling rock part 2 #(technically i use that tag to talk about maizulee but swagever) #this post is basically just stream of consciousness unstructured rambling so i hope you find it valuable in some way... #at this point i've given up on trying to do Readings of and make Arguments about sokka #and i'm just rambling. i posted a whole fucking. ACTUAL essay about him yesterday and no one read it #but this is not that. this is. who even knows. it's certainly not an ''essay'' #my thesis statement: i love sokka so much #my body paragraphs: hes a weak willed mentally ill fucking IDIOT #just trust me ok. trust the process

[anemoiashifts]

mental health check-in for reality shifting.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

as we all know, reality shifting is generally neural thing but tends to be glorified & romanized by a select few due to people wanting to have a better situation or a more desirable life.

that in itself is totally fine but this post is created with the intent to make sure the community has a healthy relationship with shifting & if not possible solutions.

if mental health is left unchecked it can lead to destructive behaviors & can worsen preexisting mental health concerns. for me personally, that’s not what shifting is about. you can learn about yourself & grow without even shifting. the expansion of your perspective & becoming more empathetic to yourself is something i believe is extremely important.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ how often do you think about shifting ?

while it’s fun to daydream & think about your desired reality — does it consume your life or take away from other tasks that need to get done in this reality? if you’re somebody who has maladaptive daydreaming disorder (like myself!) it can exacerbate the fantasy-like aspect of thinking about shifting.

if you’re someone whose mind wanders a lot do something productive. this could be finishing some homework that you’ve been putting off for a long time or rearranging your bedroom. stuff like partaking in hobbies while listening to youtube videos in the background may help too.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ why are you shifting ?

is it because you’re searching for something bigger ? maybe you’re looking for friends ? while you probably aren’t going to be able to meet your favorite characters here, you can meet lots of other people & make new connections at anytime. if it’s in person or even if it’s in an online space , i bet there are lots of people in this comment section or any shifting video who would love to be your friend.

defining why you want to shift can do wonders for uncovering more about yourself. 90% of the things people want to shift for are & can be found here & you’re more then worthy of them. just because you want something like love or a sense of belonging doesn’t mean you have to travel the multiverse for it.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ “i want to k!ll myself because i can’t shift.”

while i understand frustration, extremes that result in life altering & ending choices are never good and quite frankly, frightening for a creator to see in their comment sections. most sv!c!des are committed on impulse. we go through so many emotions on the daily & process so much information a day. taking a moment alone to think & break down thought process & long term effects your actions will have is a nice way to come back down to earth.

meditation is also a great tool to calm down. you can even use shifting guided meditations without the actual intention to shift. breath work has also been helpful to me.

i understand these suggestions aren’t long term fixes but if you’re someone who has echoed these words & truly meant it then i cannot recommend therapy & possible taking a break from shifting even more to focus on yourself right here where you are. this may not be the answer you’d like to hear but it’s the one that is possibly needed.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ timing.

there is no specific time frame that you have to shift. both children & adults do hold the capability to shift. if someone tells you, you can’t shift because ___ or that you’ll age out of something its simply not true. things take time & it’s okay if your journey doesn’t look like everyone else’s. there’s no need to stress yourself out. try to enjoy the journey as well as being excited for the outcome. essentially, a large part of the shifting journey is meditation & affirmations which are both beneficial to your mental & physical self. try to sprinkle in some self love affirmations or general positive thoughts too. even if you need to take a step away from shifting & pick it up at a later date, i encourage you to do so if it’s stressing you out or you’re only focusing on shifting or neglecting your life / responsibilities here.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

♡ shadow & trauma work.

answering questions that are meant to make you think & deeply reflect are tools that hi light some issues you may not even realize you’ve had. i have a tumblr post here with some, but for tiktok, ill list some on the next side. these ones are specifically for shifting but i encourage you to venture out to discover some more personal ones to expand upon your answers to these.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

i should also mention, i’m not a therapist so take what i say as non-professional advice & mere suggestions & a starting point to truly expand what shifting has done for you, negatively & positivity. im a huge advocate for therapy & if you feel comfortable enough expand upon these conversations in sessions if you feel comfortable.

i understand my audience is varied in age but i do notice a lot of you are younger then myself. it’s hurts to see people who are so young stress themselves out this much over trying to shift. i really do care about you & want to see all of you happy — with or without shifting.

⋅˚₊‧ ୨୧ ‧₊˚.

#reality shifting #desired reality #shifting #shiftblr #shiftok #shifting motivation #shifting realities #shifter

[dk-ghostmachines]

I gotta talk about FourDogs (again)

It's barely about her, though. I think "he's so lucky his dad was brutally murdered" and "people with trauma need a second handicap because they're too motivated" are such absolute-the-fuck-ly bonkers takes, they're not even worth the time it took me to get mad about them, which was immediately. This time around, I have way more to say about audience reception. I'll try to keep it civil.

It feels like a lot of us are responding from increasingly personal places because these are characters with which a lot of us identify, or we see traits in them that remind us of people from our real lives. And hey! Another performance and storytelling slay on the part of one Brennan Lee Mulligan. Who else can invent 50+ characters every year and play them to the point where any one of them can evoke both an "omg that's literally me!" and an "omg that's literally Dani, the girl that bullied me all of freshmen year until I punched out her front tooth in the student parking lot and got in-school suspension for a month!". And whether Kipperlily reminds you of Dani, or reflects your own anxieties about potential, ability, and trauma, an important thing to remember is this: she is not real!

Brennan made her up! Brennan made her up to tell a story, and when he made her up, he made her annoying, petty, antagonistic, and he gave her not just opposing goals to the the protagonists we know and love, but the explicit goal of ruining The Bad Kids' lives, specifically.

Now, I'm not saying she's fictional to be a dick, or dismiss any deeper readings on her or any of the Rat Grinders. I'm bringing it up because the way I'm seeing people talk to each other about these characters is starting to get a little wild and it's in danger of waking up The Olde Gods™ (i.e. the special brand of Tumblr Self-Righteousness that lives inside us all).

It's important to remember Kipperlilly is a character in a fictive work so that different interpretations of her don't get treated as stone law. Each reading of her is personal and valid, but none are gospel. The "Kipperlilly is but a victim" take is not the only correct one, nor is radical empathy for her as a character the only correct reaction. Also, even if I consider her sympathetic that is not incompatible with an opinion like "Kipperlilly needs to get roundhouse'd in the head by a lesbian in a tracksuit and/or a wizard in a jean jacket, posthaste". Sure, you can say that anyone who doesn't feel a deep and eclipsing empathy for Kipperlilly above all other emotions is immature at best and sociopathic at worst, but then I can just say anyone who demands solely empathy for Kipperlilly and excuses her literal crimes and bass-ackwards world view because she's insecure and has anger issues, is probably also someone who has a history of weaponizing whatever minority status they may or may not occupy to talk over, silence, or harass people of color.

They're both just opinions. And also, like. Y'know. A bit much.

To engage in the long and rich tradition of measuring character trajectories against those in the Avatar: The Last Airbender cartoon, let's compare Kipperlilly to Azula. Azula had an incredibly sympathetic backstory and untreated mental health issues. Azula was also a danger to herself and others, as well as profoundly manipulative and abusive (although, it was a children's show so Azula never killed anybody for whatever that's worth). Do I wish that fourteen-year-old girl had an Iroh-type in her life? Literally one adult who loved her genuinely and advocated for her best interests? Of course I do. I saw the Ember Island episode, I watched that one video essay! Does that mean it was any less satisfying to watch Zuko and Katara kick her absolute ass? No! And it was non-lethal anyway, children's show, duh.

That brings me to my other thing; Kipperlilly is a character in a fictive work that is not finished. And I know that point will age poorly, but I'm thinking it won't be the only one (hey-o). Remember the people that were calling The Bad Kids bullies? And then we learned that Kipperlilly hated Riz because his fucking dad fucking died?? And that was a full academic year before getting reanimated by a rage god?? I'll do a tame one; remember when Gilear wasn't cursed?? He was "just a guy"?? The show is serialized, gang, the world is still building! Clerickiller is not done yet, y'all need to let her cook! I'm sure we'll tune in next week to see her graduate from "unhinged" to "unaffiliated with the door frame or any frame-like structure". Reprimanding people on Tumblr will not change the trajectory of this character who, by the way, has not expressed remorse or any desire for a path other than violence. You look me in my black face after your blorbo slits a kid's throat and say "help her"?? Kipperlilly doesn't want get better right now, she wants one thing and that's for Kristen Applebees to go fuck herself and die!! You were there, you heard it!! When the fictional behavior changes, as it often does in stories, so will my opinion. There is no fore-forgiveness. Without an actual redemption arc I will continue to see the villain as a villain.

Speaking of, I think what some people have an issue with is the level of hate Kipperlilly's getting and how aggressive it is. But like.... isn't that allowed?? Because of all the stuff I said but also because like, mama said that it was okay! And by "mama" I mean Siobhan Thompson who said Kipperlilly belongs under the jail. Sure, in the real world, adults don't tell kids they belong in the ground that's crazy fucked up, but all these kids are played by adults and Emily as Fig joked that she was gonna smite the sixteen-year-old girl played by the thirty-something man. You're telling me the antagonist antagonizes the protagonists, and the protagonists go "boo, hiss" and then I, the audience, go "boo, hiss as well" but I'm wrong? I'm wrong, somehow, cool checks out.

"They're XP Levelling*punches a locker*!!"

"That girl is worse than Kalvaxus."

"Littledoggy Girlcollar"

Am I not engaging with the narrative on it's own terms if I say "i'd tell Clerickiller to die mad, but she clearly already did, Jojo Siwa head-ass, in reference to that fuck-ass ponytail and your toxic yuri" Do I need to draw a little caitmay-style OC to say it for me, would that be better?

God-forbid, we have fun? Must we discourse, always? FourDogs is tragic, FourDogs is compelling, FourDogs is Dani from 9th grade. She is Azula from Avatar and Clare from Fleabag and Brennan Lee Mulligan from my dreams and that is something that can be so personal. But no one else has to participate in your parasocial relationship. What's crazy is, I actually like Kipperlilly! As a character. I mean, the "trauma is privilege" obviously hit a nerve with me because of real life stuff, but the image of her over the rogue teacher's grave?? With a backhoe and a "gotcha, bitch" expression??? Come on, that is fresh-off-the-vine Cunt™. Even more so than I imagined that moment to be when we first heard about it. Her ending up in a Ragh or Aelwyn place would be way more satisfying than a Goldenrod or Penelope Everpetal place, BUT IT WILL ALSO be satisfying to see whatever Kipperlilly's version of the locked-in-a-chokehold-and-being-gaslit-into-thinking-you-shit-the-coach's-pants-scene is. In addition to the non-lethal ass-kicking that proceeds it.

Y'all can chuck the insinuation that something so clearly subjective is actually objective and has moral implications that make me bad, directly in the garbage. What is this, religion, hey-o.

#lost some civility there at the end #but shit im not iroh #im a hater first #and an advocate for mental health third #and second i am an advocate for poc's getting their lick back against white people #especially if they were hurting your academic prospects #yes riz is a poc even though he's played by murph #me and demi adejuyigbe talked about it #fhjy spoilers #dimension 20 #d20 #kipperlilly copperkettle #brennan lee mulligan #fhjy #fantasy high junior year #the bad kids

[dr-spectre]

Splatoon 2 Callie Explained - (In my interpretation)

So in this blog post I wanna go over what is going on with Callie in Splatoon 2 because there's a lot of misinformation being spread around due to how unclear the events of Splatoon 2 were. I'm going to provide my own thoughts into how the Hypnoshades actually affect Callie and clear up what hypnosis actually does to a person, because a lot of people think that Callie was kidnapped and then mind controlled but its actually a lot more complicated than that. I've done a ton of painstaking research into this so if you would like some sources to what I'm saying then I'll be happy to provide it in the comments below when asked!

Okay so first off we need to establish one thing right off the bat, no, Callie was not kidnapped in the sense that she was snatched up by DJ Octavio and then brainwashed while she was kicking and screaming trying to stop him. The idea that Callie was snatched up randomly is simply not to true due to the fact that the OFFICAL Splatoon 2 relationship chart states that Callie was willing to hear out DJ Octavio and go with him. Why? Because if you look at Sunken Scroll 21 and 22 in Splatoon 2, it gives insight into Callie's declining mental health as she struggles to put on a happy face as she walks through a huge crowd of people, as well as the fact that she drew a squid with a sad face on it in Sunken Scroll 22 which is a very clear giveaway that she isn't doing well. Also keep in mind Marie was busy with her own solo thing too and Callie even states in the relationship chart that she's busy and lonely. It also explains why Callie doesn't experience any sort of trauma, turmoil or resentment after Splatoon 2 because well, she wasn't kidnapped and the shades were not forcibly put on her. (Also in Squid Sister Stories chapter 7 there's an artwork piece of Callie walking towards DJ Octavio's star mark so there's that too....)

Now I want to get into how hypnosis actually affects a person and what being hypnotized is actually like. Being hypnotized is described as having "heightened attention, increased focus and heightened suggestibility." You do not get put to sleep and become a puppet as popular media shows it to be, but instead you are hyper aware of what is going on around you. It's also said to be highly relaxing and can help with patients who struggle with anxiety and other mental issues, which might explain why Callie kept putting the shades back on, she enjoys wearing them to some degree as it helps her deal with the pain of being a celebrity, kind of like an addiction but unfortunately Splatoon 2 doesn't explore it at all and Marie (CALLIE'S OWN GOD DAMN COUSIN BTW!) jokes about it..... ugh...... at least she overcomes that addiction OFF SCREEN unfortunately....

Now that part about "suggestibility" is important to consider because contrary to popular belief, you don't lose awareness and memories while you are hypnotized and the person who is in charge of hypnotizing you, CANNOT force you to do anything that's against your wishes and you do NOT lose control of your behavior. Meaning that on some level Callie actually wanted to side with the Octarians because her life beforehand was shitty. The shades do not control Callie but instead put her in a hypnotic state that relaxes her and increases her attention and suggestibility.

For example, if DJ Octavio were to tell Callie to kill Marie instead of Agent 4, she would probably have a ton of hesitation about it and probably not follow his orders. Callie doesn't want to kill Marie, but she doesn't care or know about Agent 4 and that's why she had no problems with following DJ Octavio's suggestions. She also didn't try to attack Marie during the final boss when she was flying around and she just wants Marie to leave her alone because guess what, she's suffering from mental health issues!!!!!! And her relationship with Marie got worse and worse overtime as shown with the Squid Sister Stories.

If you were hypnotized and then the person responsible of your hypnotism handed you a weapon and told you to kill your best friend, you wouldn't do it because it's against your wishes (unless you secretly wanna kill your best friend for some reason....)

With all of this information laid out, it actually does make Splatoon 2's admittedly mid story a bit more interesting, it shows that Callie does have these dark traits and flaws about her, and the Hypnoshades bring out the worst in her. The angry, power hungry and harsh side to her, that was even built up from Splatoon 1. If you look at the dialogue from the Naughty vs. Nice, Early Bird vs. Night Owl and Callie vs. Marie Splatfests, you can see that Callie actually got upset at Marie multiple times due to her attitude.

It really does make Tidal Rush more emotional and powerful as a song if you really think about it. It's a clashing of two cousins whose relationship has been broken apart and Marie is desperately trying to reach out to Callie and fix what she has done. Maybe Marie blames herself for why Callie ran away and that's why she sounds like she's on the brink of tears in the song.... And it makes Spicey Calamari Inkantation more triumphant as a song too.

It does make me a bit angry that Nintendo doesn't wanna dive into these topics as well as Callie. She is flawed and has dark traits about her but, she doesn't try to change or grow from them in any significant or well written way, its like they forgot about it in Splatoon 3 which.... sucks man. I'm hoping we get a Side Order type deal with the Squid Sisters for Splatoon 4 and we dive deeper into the psyches of these girls, because what we have is really interesting but it lacks explanation and nuance and everyone keeps boiling it down to "welp Callie got kidnapped and mind controlled!" Which... its more complex than that... With Agent 3 and Marina it's for sure mind control and i would like to talk about them in a future blog but, with Callie? It's different and there's a lot of layers a lot of people tend to ignore because Splatoon 2's story is just... meh.

#splatoon #splatoon 2 #callie cuttlefish #callie splatoon #hypno callie #octo callie #marie splatoon #marie cuttlefish #dj octavio #essay #writing

[psiirockin]

do you have any advice for opening commissions? i feel like you have them very professionally set up, and i have pretty bad social anxiety, so it might be helpful to hear tips for communicating with customers and such, or setting up a fair tos!

hi so, maybe i do have some advice!!! <33 thank you so so much for the kindness & seeing me as professional lol i’ve been doing comms for 2-3 years and i must say.. still getting the hang of a lot of things. you go through a lot of trial + error trying to figure out what works best for you, so remember theres no truly right way to go about comms! they should all fit the needs, pace, and benefit of you and your work ethic!

what i did personally is start off at some lower prices just to test the waters and get the ball rolling. i priced rendered characters at i think, $24 per character? possibly lower, i cant quite remember. and then i gradually went up as i started to progress in my art style more + had more people coming in.

with customers, i have a lot of anxiety as well! im autistic, so i never like making a customer feel like i dont truly care abt the commission by accidentally sounding too flat or anything. i tend to RLLY overthink it lol so we make sure we are extra talkative + kind about their comm! giving them compliments on the character, showing genuine excitement so they know theyre in good hands! (we love engaging esp when the customer seems VERY excited or enthusiastic abt the commission!)

a lot of irl turmoil tends to happen in our life which can make a comm delayed sometimes. could be severe mental health problems, just being busy w/ shit in general. its important to just keep your customers up to date, especially if its going to take a realllyyy long time or the customer likes frequent updates.

i used to be able to get shit done in like a night. but, with an actual line up/queue of comm work we progressively started taking longer and longer esp as we transitioned from a teenager starting out and into a busy adult with persistent mental health issues. (plus our art becomes more complex as time goes on, so that has to be taken into account) tbhs, depending on your availability and how much effort goes into your work, and as the demand grows, you need to charge accordingly and just be honest with your clientele.

as for TOS do what makes you comfortable! make your limits known and put your foot down when a request or any topic makes you uncomfortable. dont let your customers get inappropriate with you or try to make you feel bad if they dont wanna pay for what they ask for, etc. i also recommend requesting payment after sketch/half and half when starting out just so you can get some experience under your belt + assure future clients that youre professional n wont scam them! (if you plan on switching to payment upfront in the future)

just remember that u are not a machine, you are a human being making art for someone else. putting love n effort into your craft, time and effort. take your time getting the hang of comm stuff, things dont have to be perfect in your setup at first.

#asks #asks open #commissions

[twistedwonderlandwriting]

A Love Long Forgotten|𖦹๋࣭ ⭑ᡣ𐭩⊹ 𖦹๋࣭ ⭑

.......................................

Wordcount:1,021|readerx:Allstudents|Style:Oneshot

WARNINGS: Angst!|Disociation|Hanahaki

.......................................

Everything was hazy, even as you attempted to reveal your previous memories, the ones that always left a warm feeling in the pit of your stomach and made your heart squeeze in the best possible way. Though the memories that previously left you feeling all warm and fuzzy now left you with a sense of dread, or rather their lack of presence did. Leaving you with a looming dark cloud as if prophesying what was to come. Why weren't they there? Why couldn't you recall those.....wait were they happy times? Who were you with? All the figures were...not blurry but vague as if you couldn't recall what they looked like anymore, imagining different ethnicities, clothes, hair, skin, eyes, face shapes, noses, but nothing seemed to click. As if the very essence of your loved ones were slipping away, and with the memories of past experiences and people slipping away so was your spirit and will.

Who were you anymore? Were you still the same? Scratch that you obviously weren't the same. Were you even a person anymore? Looking down at your hands they didn't look like yours anymore.....hell nothing truly looked like you anymore. This world had changed you so much....too much. Body, mind, and soul it had ripped into the very fiber of your being torn apart and then flippantly tried to piece you together like a broken puzzle.....You couldn't even dress the way you used to or wanted to, forced to live in the few uniforms and whatever you could find in the lost and found. How long had it been since you arrived in this twisted wonderland? Six? Seven? Maybe eight months? Hell it could have even been a year. It had been April when your shit show of a life began...well your “life” in wonderland at least......why were you here? What was the point?

Not everything had been bad though. The people you had met had been wonderful…at times…some of them had at least, some more....challenging than others but all beautiful and talented in their own right that was the one thing you could confidently state you didn't regret.

Though with even the most wonderful people came scars, mother the time it's in a metaphorical sense but unfortunately for you it had been quite literal as soon as you were thrust into this world. Fighting for your life metaphorically and physically as you barely scrounged by. Becoming a friend, therapist, reliable constant in your friends lif-…no. In the schools. Slowly reassuring, validating and guiding all the mentally crippled students into a slightly better mentality bit by bit while ironically your mental health eroded away…

Not minding because they were friends. I mean they would do the same in return right? They appreciated your efforts, right? Even if they didn't understand your references or jokes at times they still cared.

.

.

.

.

“I'm so glad we're friends.”

The pause in his actions hurt more than any slap across the face or outright rejection ever could have. Maybe it was wrong. You shouldn't have blurted it out. Just being stupidly sentimental while rolling cookie dough into balls, maybe that was the reason, maybe the small action made you feel like a kid again. Less damaged, less broken, lifting your heart in a way that it hadn't in a long long time. It may have been wrong to blurt something so sentimental out, but it just felt so right as you helped him bake a plethora of deserts for the upcoming birthday party. Though the apologetic smile he gave you afterwards taking a brief moment to let his eyes linger on you before he pushed up his glasses and turned back his gaze down to the counter, working wordlessly made it so much worse.

One by one your casual small acts of service, gifts, and company were being rejected so casually by everyone you offered them to. As the memories seemed to flood you squeezing at your heart as a reminder of how little your so called "friends" truly cared as you leaned over the toilet bowl hacking and coughing into it the petals and blood that seemed to form in your throat and get thicker at like a unwanted metallic sludge clogging your throat. It was a massacre with how many differing types of flowers, succulents, and even a form of mushroom species you had clogging your throat, shaking around painfully in your lungs, hitting the walls with painful thuds while you coughed. A painful and bitter reminder of your predicament: Getting out as much as you could before flushing the toilet.

Using the edges and what little strength remained to push yourself up from your kneeling position. Wobbly staggering over to sink to wash off the blood and petals that suck to you from around you mouth and dripping onto your chin with the freezing water that snapped you out of your dazed.

No one had even taken notice to your wobbly steps or how you covered your mouth to cough into your hands at least twenty times an hour as the Hanahaki got worse with each passing day. Though you would have thought that Vil, Riddle, Rook, or even Malleus's astute eyes should have noticed…The thick but now familiar feeling of something gathering in your throat started once again, signaling once more that another coughing or rather choking fit was near. Covering your mouth once more as the petals filled your hands. Though unlike the last few times, it didn't stop. The build-up becoming worse as the attempt of getting the pesky beings out of your airway failed. Your vision darkened suddenly as a wave of nausea and dizziness hit worse than it ever had before. The cold feeling of the tile making contact with your knees causing the thud to ripple throughout the empty halls as the flowers blocked your airway and filled your lungs.

Unrequited love really hurt, but it would be fine. You'd love them all even if it killed you. After all, wasn't it fitting you put your life on the line for them one last time.

#disney twst #twst #twisted wonderland #twisted wonderland x reader #twst x reader #twst angst #Twisted wonderland angst #angst #hanahaki #riddle rosehearts #trey clover #cater diamond #ace trappola #deuce spade #Leona Kingscholar #ruggie bucchi #Jack Howl #Azul Ashengrotto #Jade Leech #Floyd Leech #kalim al asim #jamil viper #vil schoenheit #rook hunt #epel felmier #Idia shroud #ortho shroud #malleus draconia #lilia vanrouge #twst silver

[redroses07]

How The Evans Would React To Reader Who Has Panic Attacks

A/N: Hi guys!! This is just what I headcanon Evan's characters to be like with a partner who has panic attacks. As someone who deals with panic attacks personally, this hits really close to home. I hope y'all enjoy, and comments are always appreciated.

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆₊˚⊹♡ ✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆₊˚⊹♡

Tate Langdon

Has experienced panic himself, so is surprisingly good at handling them.

Will hold you as close as possible until it passes.

Lets you cry into his chest and sometimes even sheds a few tears himself.

Combs his fingers through your hair and presses soft kisses to your forehead.

He's mostly quiet during them considering he's not the best with his words, and mostly relies on his physical presence to comfort you.

Tate hates seeing you like this, so he always pushes you to have a conversation about what triggered the attack once you're calm.

Tate obviously isn't a mental health expert, but he wants to help you to the best of his ability.

Kit Walker

The SWEETEST boy oh my lord.

Kit will immediately drop whatever he's doing and rush to be by your side.

He takes both of your hands in his, and pulls you into him.

"Look at me, sweetheart. You'll get through this."

Is super vocal, and his words always help calm you.

Will kiss your tears away until you don't have anymore to shed.

"I love you hon, it's gonna be okay."

Once you've calmed down some, he'll carry you to bed so you can rest.

Listens to your every request and does whatever in order to make you feel comfortable.

Also makes sure that he knows your triggers so he can help minimize your attacks.

Kit is the king of communication, and your relationship is built on honesty and transparency.

Pre-Death Kyle Spencer

Also extremely sweet and loving.

I'm a firm believer that Kyle is an amazing listener so over time he becomes very well equipped to help you.

"Hey babe are you okay?"

"Oh shit!" He immediately pulls you into him.

Will sway back and forth as he holds you to help soothe you.

Also I think he would have a habit of humming softly in your ear, whether it's consciously or not.

Jimmy Darling

I know for a fact that Jimmy is a big hugger, so his first instinct is to give you a big hug.

He doesn't have much experience with panic attacks, but I'm sure my queen Ethel taught him how to be empathetic.

I feel like he would sing to you to calm you down, doing what he does best yk?

I think he'd be a super anxious boyfriend, so he'll constantly check in on you for the next few days to make sure you're okay.

"Hey, how're ya feeling?"

"Jimmy, I told you I'm okay."

"I know, I know, I just want to be extra sure."

James March

I feel like he'd lowkey be super confused, especially the first time you had an around him.

Given the fact that he's over 100 years old he doesn't even know what a panic attack is.

I feel like he would think you were being possessed at first and freak out.

Once he does understand though, he'd actually be very loving.

For one thing, if James happens to fall in love with you then he is IN LOVE.

He would devote his life to you and nothing about you could deter him from loving you.

The main thing he'll do to comfort you is kiss you everywhere.

Like he will kiss your cheeks, your shoulders, your nose, your lips. Not in a sexual way, but in an affectionate way.

Kai Anderson

I think he'd be super super awkward about it.

Like I can honestly imagine him giving you a pat on the shoulder and being like "get it together."

On the other hand, if he's in a good mood, he'd start talking about how once he takes control of the country you won't have to deal with anything like that anymore.

If he's feeling extra generous he'll even hold your hand to help you relax.

Kai is your typical narcissist so he would deal with your panic attacks in the only way that he knows how, making it about himself.

But you know that's just how he is, and that he shows his affection in his own way.

#evan peters #american horror story #ahs #ahs fandom #ahs murder house #tate langdon #ahs fic #ahs tate #ahs x reader #ahs coven #ahs hotel #ahs fanfiction #ahs cult #james patrick march #james march x reader #tate langdon fanfic #tate langdon x reader #kit walker fanfic #kit walker x reader #kit walker #kyle spencer #kyle spencer x reader #jimmy darling #jimmy darling x reader #kai anderson #kai anderson x reader #kai anderson x you #james march x you #ahs freakshow #ahs asylum

[usbkinitopet]

mmm ;; took a breaktime for myself for a few days now its time to see my favorite axolotl<3

niiitooo your user thinks you're talking to yourself and have gone crazy (i SOUND crazy just by saying this but guys i swear it's in the user's entries) can you describe how you're seeing asks/anons ? are they uhh like..,, jpgs on your screen? have you tried touching them/us yet? maybe you could take an internal screenshot of us and show your user?^^c -🕊️

"Welcome Back!.. taking breaks, is always good for mental health!!.. my [USER] takes breaks all the time!!"

"..My.. [USER] thinks I'm talking to myself?.. and thinks I'm crazy?.. well.. I already knew that, Friend!.. but.. I'm still trying to get them to see what your all saying!.."

"as for what I'm seeing.. usually it's in the form of a window!.. I'm.. too afraid to touch it, because it might disappear forever, and I might lose contact with all of you!!.. and that terrifies me to think about!.."

"I don't ever want to be alone again!.." "Kinito?.. are you okay??" "Ahem.. sorry!.. I.. got scared there for a moment.. and a bit off track.. but here.. let me show you, what I see!.. I finally got a screenshot!!"

"There we go!!, Tada!!.." "Woah.. how'd you do that, dude!?.."

(Woah, I don't remember this apart of the ask!.. sorry technical difficulties!.. hehe) - Mod Soni

#kinitopet #kinito my beloved #usb!kinitopet #kinito au #usb!kinito #usb!kinito au #kinito pet #kinito the axolotl #kinitopet fanart #kinito #usb!sam #usb!kinitopet au #ask answered #sam kinitopet #kinito fanart #sam the sea anemone #sam x kinito #kinito x sam #kinitopet ask blog #kinitopet my beloved #kinitopet art #kinitopet sam

[yuri-for-businesswomen]

the thing is - pro prostitution activists (and people who agree with idea) usually never suggest their 'perfect system'. On average, they just scream 'it needs to be legalised and then everything will be great', sometimes you get few ideas on how to protect "sex workers". But you know what? Whenever I do see such discussions and their suggestions, I can easily come up with 3 different scenarios where their rules and laws won't work or just would/can be ignored and women would still be harmed. EVERY TIME. People did and do all kinds of shady stuff, even in highly regulated industries + cool phenomenon called 'corruption'. Do they really think men give a shit about law, especially those who don't see women as human beings (and its all of them)?

The pro 'sex work' discourse is just people using fancy words to state that they don't believe misogyny exists, women are exploited, but most importantly they believe that men's pleasure and need to masturbate (with woman body) are more important than women's feeling and right to be save.

i recently had a very frustrating and saddening exchange with a woman on here who is in prostitution and kept saying the same thing (it should be legal) over and over again and when i told her it is legal in germany and it has not made things better just shifted problems and increased demand she said well but its legal that is definitely better. and you know i myself dont advocate for prostituting oneself to be illegal at all, i think its crazy that 30 % of women incarcerated in the usa where its fully criminalised are prostitutes, but it seems like usual people are only able to grasp the two extremes: full legalisation or full criminalisation. when in reality, abolishing the sex industry is a lengthy and complex process, but you have to start somewhere.

they say, „you wont stop prostitution by criminalising/outlawing it“ but think they can somehow stop the harm of prostitution through legal means, lmao (which also ignores the inherent harm of bought consent compared to freely given consent and knowingly making someone endure sexual acts for money). there has to be a cultural and legal and economic shift and thats a lot. we have to alleviate poverty from women systematically affected by it (single mothers, immigrated women, mentally ill, disabled, addicted women, and so on); this means pulling out the roots of misogyny and we all know this is not in the works. the difference between them and us is, we think a different future is possible if the effort is put in, but they dont. which is so fucking bleak and tells you a lot about how women see their own position in society, and the chances of it getting better.

even if you dont criminalise buying sex, you could still make it more difficult to buy sex. „but then it will move back to the black market“ honey its already there, even here in germany where its legal. so much prostitution is happening invisible, in apartment buildings and deserted areas. we should work towards ways how to reach women in these situations without legalising their abuse. if there was a perfect solution that immediately solved all the issues, we would advocate for it, dont you think? but there is no perfect solution and just accepting men will always use their money to coerce sex is just not something im okay with and we, as a society claiming to want gender equality should be okay with.

why not reverse what we have in germany right now? instead of prostitutes needing to register, its sex buyers who have to register. they need to do regular health checkups. they need to carry their sex buyer id with them or they will get fined. the registry is public because wives, daughters, partners and even your employer should be able to make decisions based on the knowledge that that man is coercing women into sex with his money. most sex buyers are partnered you know. „the government will never do that“ well they sure as hell wont if nobody advocates for it and instead opts for the lazy, superficial „fix“ of legalisation? and also, they say an issue under criminalisation is that prostitutes and other „sex workers“ are hassled by cops. well do tell who will enforce those sacred regulations you want? if it was for them, everybody would just „mind their own business“ and the state does not interfere with the sex industry at all and they somehow think this will protect vulnerable groups?! it doesnt make any fucking sense.

it is really frustrating to me. at the end of the day you have to ask, what is your feminism, if you want to accept, regulate, institutionalise, normalise, legitimise and legalise this form of systemic sexual abuse (because using your money to coerce sexual acts IS abuse of power) at the hands of men instead of working towards a future where we are equal? there is no equality as long as the sex industry exists and profits off and reinforces social inequality, specifically misogyny and racism.

#ask #anti prostitution #rant

[cookiesupplier]

Every Rose Has Its Thorns - Part Forty

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc x Chris 'Motionless' Cerulli

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, online bullying, panic attacks, stalking, mental health issues, conspiracy theories.

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. For everyone involved.

author’s note: Unbeta'd as usual, enjoy!

To read from the beginning, check out the Masterlist Here!

tags: @tearfallpixie @cncohshit @jordynyingling0219 @faceless-mirror

@nyxthedestroyerofworlds @wild-child-7747 @witchyweeb34 @black-damask1999

@jilliemiw86 @ilovesamkiszka @lyschko666 @lacktoesandtoddlerants

@bngurngheart @collapsedglasshouses @laurpartyprogram @sunsshinesunny

@malerieee @talialovesmiw @shilohrosechicken @thatchickwiththecamera @tamtam-elizabeth

Tag List is Open, please let me know if you would like to be added to it or in general.

Talia had spent most of the morning with Ava. She promised her that Vinny was supportive of them spending some time together today after how the night before had gone, even if they had already been talking so late into the night. They’d decided that they had wanted to go out after being so cooped up, and went window shopping, just like they always used to, while Vinny decided to randomly jump online for a surprise streaming session. The fact that he’d pushed them both out of the door, assuring them that his subscribers would probably just love a surprise stream, eased Talia’s worry that he might be upset about her stealing more time with Ava. 

Really, Talia just didn’t want to be that demanding friend, especially when she was already living in his house, and the thought that she might be verging on outstaying her welcome? It filled her with utter dread. Of course, the moment she was talking to Ava about the possibility of her considering whether it was time for her to go home, she shut her down immediately. Talia had tried to explain she thought she needed to sort things out back there for a little bit, but Ava hadn’t wanted to hear a word about it. She had been insistent that Talia still had so much she still needed to sort out with Ricky, not to mention whatever this was that was happening with Chris. Putting it off was not going to help anything. When Talia had looked at her quickly then, worried that her best friend was attempting to fish for more information about what was going on there. She had been clear the night before she was going to tell her, but not without talking to Chris about that. She knew how Ava could be wanting to know, but Ava knew how she was as well, especially considering her own situation. 

Relationships, soulmates, they weren’t easy, for anyone, at any time, well, Kyle and Jordan didn’t count, they were the lucky few. While it wasn’t a leap to guess this did involve Chris potentially in a relationship sense, Talia had far from even admitted that this had anything to do with this having something to do with Chris’ soulmate. She didn’t know if Vinny has or hasn’t said anything to her about Chris’ soulmate situation. After all it was only the band and his family that knew, and he said as much, he hadn’t mentioned Ava when Chris had told her. 

So they’d gone shopping. Well, they’d gone window shopping, hanging around the stores, and just having fun. It was something they used to do all the time, really just making time to hang out together out and about. Things had gotten in the way, life had got in the way, and it felt good that they could actually take the time to spend together now. It was late afternoon, when they’d gone back to Vinny’s and were finishing up watching a movie together, when Talia got a call from Ricky and Chris. The guys were asking her to come over, when they mentioned that they had an update from Chris contacts, and didn’t want to say anything else over the phone, it had gotten her attention. Oh, oh, that felt a bit weird, so of course, she agreed. She needed to know what they’d found out now.

Leaving Ava to Vinny, chuckling to herself when she got into Ava’s rental car after Vinny laughed about how he was finally getting his girlfriend back after she stole her for the whole day, how dare she.. It was nice to know he was joking. Talia would readily admit, people made her nervous sometimes, especially jokes like that from Vinny. Vinny’s opinion mattered, because Ava mattered, and the thought of ruining that balance between them was definitely a worry, too much, and she wasn’t sure how it would turn out. She was never going to be that friend that would make Ava choose. Knowing everything was fine with him was making it easier, or at least Ava assuring her it was. 

Not that it mattered right now, she was happy that Vinny seemed okay for the moment with Ava. What she was curious about was what Chris seemed to have found out and hadn’t wanted to tell her over the phone. That was what she was wondering as she drove over Chris place, picking up something for dinner on the way, she told them she would, even if it was a little early. She’d offered not wanting to worry about it like last night and if it was anything like yesterday, as fun as it had been, she didn’t think she could handle another night of strawberry covered chocolates. Though, she had a feeling if Rick was going to offer to make dessert again, he wasn’t going to risk those brownies not working a second time. Or worse, would he do the strawberries on purpose.. No, no, it was better she offered to take care of dinner tonight.

So that was how Talia turned up at Chris’ house with a few pizzas in hand. She picked up the meat lovers for Ricky, she knew it was a safe choice for him, vegan mediterranean for Chris because she knew he loved it. She picked up a vegan deluxe for herself as it was something she could share, and it was something they could all eat if they wanted. If she made sure that Ricky’s pizza was the extra spicy version, then that was for her to know after Chris chilli story last night, maybe she was looking forward to seeing his face while he was eating it. The first bite wasn’t that bad, she knew that much, it was as you continued to eat it, that was when the heat really hit, but all the same, that was how she turned up, pizza, garlic bread, drinks.. Dinner all ready.

Almost as soon as she rang the bell the door swung open and Chris was right there, just like last time, so it made her curious what was happening. He looked, well, she wasn’t sure if he was just nervous, excited, what was that look in his eyes as he seemed to want to vibrate out of his skin? Between Chris and Rick, who seemed to pop out of nowhere the next second to usher her into the house, both of them taking the small stack of pizza and food from her arms as they brought her in. There was a strange energy vibrating as she looked between the two of them right then, a tingle running down her spine as they ushered her into the house.

It was starting to get to be a familiar feeling, sitting around the couches together, talking. Only this time, Ricky felt different. Instead of wound up and tense as a coil as he had been the last few times, he had hope. After all the mistakes, the missteps he’d been making with Talia, after how horribly he’d treated her, he knew he needed to make it up to her. Ricky had hope. He felt a bit more relaxed. That wasn’t to say he wasn’t sitting there, a little wound up, but tonight, at least, it was for a different reason. 

So as they were eating dinner, Rick let Chris take the reins for explaining everything with Micah. He started going over everything with the message board, and the freaky first phone call, then the weird spy craft moment that Rick had,

“Are you going to get to the point of the story any time soon, Chris?”

Ricky chuckled as he asked after he swallowed a bite of his pizza, glancing at Talia, the spicy sauce dancing on his tongue as he did. He knew what she’d done with his pizza, the smirk on her lips told the story what she was waiting for, he wasn’t going to give it to her. This was nothing compared to Chris’ chilli, nothing. Cheeky, though, very cheeky. He did wink to her though, he’d give her this one.

“If you want to take over, Ricky, be my guest.”

Smirking, as his attention returned to Chris.

“No, go ahead, he’ll get to the important part eventually, Sweetheart, I swear.”

Taking another bite of his pizza, it actually wasn’t bad. He was going to have to ask Talia later if it was a specific change she made to the order, or just a different pizza she’d bought to the ones he’d usually go with. After, of course, no doubt getting ribbed about admitting to enjoying it, he knew that was coming if he asked her at all. Maybe he could find a way around that, who could say. 

Finally, Chris got to the part about Micah explaining to them about the dangers about the testing with the other scientists. Ricky was done with his pizza by this point, even if he hadn’t been, he’d have dropped it to focus on Talia. He was worried how she might take this part, she had enough trouble with doctors, he didn’t want her to have to agonise over what might happen to her, to any of them.

“Sweetheart, don’t you worry for one second that we’re going to let anything happen, we’ve already talked it out. Chris has already deleted his contacts on the message boards, Micah himself pointed out that he should cut off all contact with the research departments, including himself.”

When Talia looked over to him the moment Ricky spoke, he knew she needed the assurances, even though he could see how strong she was trying to be. He couldn’t even imagine the thoughts going through her head right now, and if he was honest, he didn’t really want to.

“The only contact to anyone, in any way, is this burner phone number. Admittedly, to Micah, but it is only this burner phone, nothing else.”

Chris held up the phone Micah had called them on earlier.

“Micah has emphasised he will only call if he finds out someone else in the department has my name, or my contact info somehow. They should never have it though, JellyBean, I assure you. I did everything anonymously. Micah is literally the only person that knew anything about me personally, and yesterday was the very first time he spoke to a single soul other than me.”

Ricky watched as Chris reached for her hand, he wanted to reach for her too, but he remembered the night before. Even then, all it took was the slightest brush between them and for the flare of sensation linking their tattoos to burst through and overcome them, even with Chris in the kitchen. Not to mention trying to sleep last night, all he could think about was watching them both eat those damn strawberries. He honestly didn’t know if they had been the worst, or best, idea ever. Still, he’d gotten a dessert made in the end, so neither of them had been able to say a single thing, he’d met Talia’s challenge, hands down.

“So,”

Talia looked towards them both as she spoke softly,

“What it comes down to is that we now all have two soulmates, and we can’t tell anyone?”

“At least no one we don’t trust with our lives. Essentially.”

Some might say that was a bit much when Ricky said it like that, but he didn’t see it that way. While yes, if the wrong person heard about this, it could go sideways really fast, and none of them was going to stand for that. He knew all of them had very tight-knit circles, though. Talia because of the painful past that she had, and for Chris and Ricky, their professional work, and their unfortunate history with stalkers, it came with the territory. 

“Where do you two think we should go from here?”

Talia’s voice was quiet, glancing between them both nervously, and Ricky had a feeling he knew exactly what the problem was. He had made his stance clear on soulmates before, well, after Grace, crystal clear. He didn’t want one, not with Talia, and even when Chris started showing signs, he obviously pushed him towards her instead.

Here, this was why he was a little wound up this time, not because he was having to keep his distance from Talia, and Chris, with the tattoos, but because of what he planned to say.

“Well, we go on a date.”

Soon as he said it though, he felt both pairs of eyes looking at him, Talia and Chris both turning to him, and he raised an eyebrow at him as Chris voiced what they were obviously thinking,

“Who are you talking to, Rick?”

Smiling, really, they were really asking him that, he just gave them a look, wasn’t it obvious?

“Both of you, idiots.”

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

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