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#since i forgot i wanted to link that in my Face Studies Ask response
todayisafridaynight · 9 months
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tumblr stop trying to copy twitter and for the love of god please improve your tagging system i just want to find A Post using keywords i know should work
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ihavenocluedude · 2 years
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Major Conveniences ~ part 3
Klitz x Female!reader
Link to reading it on Ao3    Link to main Masterlist
Masterlist for Major Conveniences 
A/N- Once again very fluffy and very corny. But we got the teeny tiny plot I’ve actually thought of for this fic stirred in! 
Word Count for this part - 2 005
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Klitz was always in a way beautiful. Whether he was in his peak nerdiness with awkward glances or when he got that random peak of confidence and whispered things just some millimetres away from your ear.
But this was clearly his most beautiful moment that you had seen yet. You’d been dating for a while now and Klitz’s roommate was visiting his parents for the week and so you had been able to stay in his room last night after you'd hung out. So there you were lying beside a beautiful sleeping Klitz.
He had started growing out his bangs and kept with the side-swept bangs for a while now. You hadn't ever really suggested it but you kept sweeping his bangs to the side to see his eyes. So you might’ve had something to do with it. But who wouldn't do that to be able to see those eyes clearly?
Although you couldn't see his eyes now, there was still something lovely about being able to just see him without that big fringe blocking his face from you. And the way his hair spread out over the pillow behind him. His mouth slightly parted as he lightly snored in his sleep. His arms around you even in his sleep, his arms would probably be completely asleep when he woke up.
He simply looked so in peace. And yet it was time to disturb that peace just a little.
"Baby?" You whispered, pressing one kiss on his chest, another one onto his neck before lifting yourself a little and craning your head up to press one onto his forehead as well. "Klitzy." You sang softly as his eyes slowly started to open, mouth starting to grumble a little sleepily.
"Good morning," he mumbled practically as soon as he could start to speak, a small smile forming on his lips.
You hadn't been able to do this yet because neither of you felt truly comfortable putting your roommates in that situation. There had still been moments alone in each other's rooms just not sleeping over completely.
But now it was just the two of you, laying there side-by-side.
"I don't want to get up yet." You grumbled slightly as you nuzzled yourself into his arms, resting your face in the crook of his neck, one of his hands coming up to stroke the back of your head.
"We don't have to."
"You sure?" Klitz was often the one who was the reasonable one, the one to get up early, the one to study more. But he had started to indulge more in everything, in going to the parties, in spending as much time as possible with you. "No test you need to study for or anything?"
"Nuh-uh. Just spending all my time here today with my girl."
"Your girl, huh?" You questioned raising your head out of the crook of his neck, your eyebrows shooting up and smiling smugly at him. He hadn't asked you yet but to be honest, you'd figured that he just forgot to ask.
"Did I not- are we not?-... fuck." He had been stressing over that ever since you first kissed him when to ask, how to ask. By this point he had just thought about it enough to believe that he had already asked you to be his girlfriend.
"You're so cute."
"Yeah?" He chuckled whilst shaking his head softly at himself. "So you want to be my girlfriend?"
"Of course." You mumbled in response, sleepily getting closer to him before connecting your lips to his.
Klitz still felt as if he was in some sort of too-good-to-be-true dream. His classes were challenging and fun, although he didn't like all of his professors. Things with his friends, both the ones at the college and Eli and Matt, were going good. And you were like a dream come true.
With that in mind, he almost felt as if he was just waiting for the bubble to pop. For something to go wrong or at least for one of his courses to truly get hard and frustrating.
But instead, he just got content with the way everything was going. Klitz didn't feel as out of place anymore as he had in high school. Of course, he had had Matt and Eli back then but now he could start taking up more space, so he did.
He started voicing his opinions more and also learnt when he shouldn't.
"What do you mean you haven't seen it?" His friend Jake exclaimed as they sat in the library.
"Dude! Keep your voice down." Klitz immediately whisper-shouted back, swatting his arm before looking back down at his course literature. You were supposed to join them soon enough and for probably the first time since he'd met you, this was a conversation Klitz did not want you in.
"No seriously, how have you not seen it? It's like being passed around religiously!" The educational video that the tripod had made at prom had gone big, so he heard about it often. Usually it was discussed in groups. Weirdly enough not in his own group of friends so far but he could hear it around campus.
Either in whispers among a small group of friends who didn't want the surrounding people to hear them say 'dick' in the library and get strange looks. Or it could be in the middle of one of the campus lawns with loud laughs flooding from them as they discussed it.
There were all sorts of opinions on it, some loved it and discussed how it would make a true difference within sex ed. Some just absolutely hated it because they thought that their way of making it had been wrong. And some just talked about it to laugh about it or create an inside joke out of it.
"I just haven't." That was a lie. Klitz had gotten to see it when it had been finished in editing and before it had been sent over for mass production. But he supposed he hadn't truly watched it, he had fast-forwarded to his part of the video.
Klitz hadn't told anyone at college about his last few months in high school. He was a pretty quiet person as is and when getting to college he really didn't want to be the guy to tell everyone that he had been to a porn convention and that he's already paid off his tuition through the money that he had gotten from that video.
What was he supposed to say, 'Yeah that video with someone sitting completely naked next to a pornstar and she puts a condom on them? Yep, that's me!'. Besides, he wore the fencing mask for a reason.
At the same time, he wanted to see the video again. And wanted to see reactions to it, after all, he had just heard the conversations people had had after seeing it, not whilst seeing it. He maybe just didn't want to talk about it, afraid that the information that it’s him would somehow slip out.
~~~
"I got it!"
"Klitz, come on!" You dragged him along with you into the room that everyone was gathering into. It hadn't really struck him that this was how the groups had seen it. Sitting in front of the TVs, all clustered together.
"Do you really want to see this?"
"Klitz, they're all saying that this is revolutionizing-"
"Not everyone."
"No, okay, but a lot of people are." You insisted before adding "And I don't want to see it with a group of practically strangers without my boyfriend there. It's just a few minutes long, then we'll go right back to studying or whatever." You exaggeratedly told him in a whiny tone whilst pouting at him and pulling on his arm.
"Fine." He chuckled, following into the room along with you, letting you pull him down onto the couch pillows that sat on the ground in the far back of the room.
And then there the video was, playing up like old memories, like a home video for Klitz... except not that family-friendly.
"How do you think they shot this? I mean that looks like a high school, right? Like an actual one?" You questioned quietly so you wouldn't get shushed. Meanwhile Klitz found himself barely even looking at the tv and instead glancing at you pretty often to gauge your reactions. "How many people do you think actually takes this in? Like, doesn’t get distracted by... y'know the... them?"
You kept making small comments, small questions that you just wanted to voice and didn't need answers to, although maybe you’d ask some of them again later to actually discuss them.
And then there April was again, sitting on the tables in the library and he entered in his fencing mask, a robe around him that quickly got unwrapped by April. And then there he was.
And the room Klitz was in currently bursting out into remarks about him. Several of the guys and girls talking about how he was huge. Bringing a smug smirk to his face.
But then he turned his head to you and there you sat just quietly. Not making a single comment or any sort of face he could try to interpret.
He already knows that you had said something along the lines of what the people around you just said when you first saw his dick. So he knew that the dick itself wasn't the problem. Was it the fact that he was there and you didn't want to show some sort of reaction in front of him? Klitz decided not to ask.
Except that you didn't say anything after it was over either, just stood up, reached your hand to Klitz to help him get up and then walked out of the room with him. The two of you going back to your studying and starting to talk about other things.
~~~
"So she just didn't say anything?" Eli questioned as if that could be the worst possible outcome ever.
Silence was probably one of the best outcomes when he truly thought about it. Maybe it was just the nice thing to do, not to say anything about 'another guy's dick' in front of him. "How dare she? I made your dick look good!"
"It already looks good," Klitz argued back as he leaned back in his desk chair, looking out the window at the campus where you were somewhere roaming after your last lecture of the day.
"Did you even want a reaction, Klitz?"
"Of course, he wanted a reaction!"
"Eli!” Matt called out before continuing, ”Klitz, as far as she knows it's not yours, right? And she doesn't know how you'd react to saying something about another guy's. It just makes sense that she wouldn't say anything"
"I guess."
"If you really want to know you could just ask?" Klitz was not going to admit to his first girlfriend that he was the naked guy in a fencing mask in a video circulating nationally.
~~~
You, on the other hand, did not know how to approach this. You couldn't be truly sure of it, could you?
It couldn't be?
Right?
I mean that would just be... wild?
But you weren't sure... So you asked the guy that had had the tape if you could loan it to 'show it to your friends’.
And it felt weird.
Because why wouldn't it feel weird to lock yourself into one of the rooms with a TV and put the tape in and fast forward until... Well until you could try to see if your suspicions had been right.
Klitz doesn't have many identifying marks, not really anyway. But there is a mole on his thigh that you should be able to see if...- and that settles it.
Klitz is in the video that is so-called revolutionizing and being shown all over the country, if not also outside the country. Thousands, probably millions, have seen your boyfriend's dick.
If it's true anyway. Denial was still the main go-to in this situation. Klitz wouldn't be the type to- How did he even?
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peachycoreroo · 3 years
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angel | kuroo tetsurou
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summary: the only thing that came to mind when you heard the word angel, was your crushes ex girlfriend. so what do you do when suddenly you’re the angel or how a book can bring two people together
pairing: college!kuroo tetsurou x fem!reader
genre: smut, a lotta plot tho, basically pwp
word count: 7.9k
warnings: dom!kuroo, fingering, oral fem! receiving, praise, both being extremly needy, it’s not really kinky, slight breeding kink tho, a few spanks, vaginal penetration
authors note: pls don’t even ask about the book thing, this entire thing is based of one of my dreams and i had no idea why the book appeared, but it did and i didn’t wanna leave it out soooo, ye<3 here’s a link to my masterlist
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you sighed, as you continued typing your essay. maybe coming to the coffee shop was not the best idea you had, since it was friday and apparently every college student on campus decided it was coffee time after their lecture, but you didn’t expect it to be so overflown with people.
sitting at the far back, you realized that you were not going to get any work done with how loud everyone around you was being, so you just sat back and observed the people around you, while drinking the cheap coffee you ordered earlier. observing and analyzing the behavior of those around you always came natural to you. some guy watching his girlfriend as she was deciding what to order, even though she was taking way too long, with love. a friend group of a few pretty girls walking past a table full of sexist pigs who thought the only way to get their attention was by whistling after them as if they were dogs.  and your crush looking at you.
wait.
huh?
quickly averting your eyes back to your laptop, you could feel your heart rate pick up to an unnatural speed. pretending to suddenly be terribly busy with drinking coffee, a million thoughts ran through your head. you were quite positive that you’ve seen his girlfriend sitting right next to him, so why was he staring so intensely at you?
it’s not as if you never talked. kuroo tetsurou was easily the most interesting person you have ever had the pleasure of having intellectual conversations with. you were taking some business classes in your third semester, since you thought they would be of value for your future. that’s where you met him. kuroo sat next to you since the first day of the lecture but you were way too intimidated by his attractiveness to start the first real conversation beyond greetings, so when the opportunity had arisen, you snatched it right away.
after one of the lectures, he left his phone on the desk and since he was already gone, you took it and hurried after him. just as he was leaving through the huge main doors of your university, you caught up to him and grabbed his arm. embarrassingly, not being the most athletic made you look like a creep as kuroo directed his confused stare at your form, hunched over, breathing hard but still latching onto his arm.
“uh, hi? y/n, right?”, the tall boys’ confusion lightly seeped into his questioning tone as his eyes moved between you and the hand you used to hold him back from walking further.
taking one last deep breath, you forced yourself to stand up right and look into his eyes, but oh, what mistake that was. funnily enough, you never actually looked directly into his eyes, so you didn’t expect to suddenly have to divert all your focus on trying to keep the gasp, you wanted to let out, in your throat. in your memories, from the milliseconds you had the courage to look into his eyes when he greeted you, his eyes were brown but all at once you were confronted with the most beautiful hazel eyes you have ever seen.
as a consequence of having to put all your mental capacity on not gasping out loud or even worse, admitting how attractive he was, the words that came out of your mouth only furthered your embarrassment.
“you. phone. lecture. forgot”, you stumbled over your words as if that were your first attempt at communicating.
feeling your already hot face burn brighter as tetsurous confusion further solidified on his handsome face, you only hoped he thought the running was responsible for you looking like a sweaty mess.
you forced yourself to let out a short laugh as you broke eye contact to gain back your composure. “sorry, I didn’t expect the running to get to me that bad. maybe lev is right, I should try some aerobics with him”, starting to mumble towards the end, you shook your head. “anyway, you forgot your phone on the table in our lecture just now. i didn’t want to hold onto it till thursday and didn’t know where else to find you, so i ran after you. m’ sorry if I kinda freaked you out”, you quickly added while holding out his phone to him.
as you never really talked to the tall man before, your head snapped up to look at him when you heard his deep chuckle. was there something that’s not attractive about this man?
taking the phone from your hands, you were finally able to experience the first full sentence kuroo tetsurou ever directed at you. “well, thanks. i definitely didn’t wanna be without a phone two whole days, so i appreciate you running after me with such determination”, he remarked, as he observed how out of breath you still were, grinning.
“oh god, you know, never doing anything nice for you ever again sounds good right about now”, you groaned, lifting a hand in front of your face to stop him from studying your slightly damp face.
nothing on this green-blue-brown floating rock in space that is also known as the earth, could have prepared you for what you were witnessing next. with your mouth slightly ajar, you looked at tetsurou as he leaned over, clutching his stomach, while letting out the funniest laugh you have ever heard in your life.
in your mind, you saw a quick flash of a scene from ‘the lion king’, in which one of the hyenas was laughing exactly like that. you briefly wondered whether kuroo was influenced by that scene as a kid before you couldn’t keep your laugh in anymore after the initial shock subdued.
“my apologies, the situation was just way too perfect for me to not tease you. i’d be honored if you’d grace me with your kindness again, my highness”, he slightly bowed while, once again, flashing you that sly smirk that made you wanna punch and make out with him at the same time.
you tried to match his energy as best as you could with your head jumbled from the proximity to the man you have been sitting next to every tuesday and thursday from 10 a.m. to 12 p.m., but looking back at the interaction, you couldn’t wrap your head around tetsurou wanting to continue talking to you after that conversation.
“i’ll consider it, peasant.”
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after that, you and your smart seatmate talked a lot more. you found out that he was majoring in sports management and minoring in chemistry even though it was so different from management, just because he liked it. lev, your best friend at college since the first day when he didn’t see you from his 6’5” point of view and knocked you over as you were looking at the menu in the very coffee shop you were currently sitting in, turned out to be one of kuroo’s old friends from high school. which let you to find out the most unfortunate information about kuroo tetsurou thus far.
as you were walking to your next lecture with the dark-haired man, lev joined in with a tall, blonde, and gorgeous woman by his side. you immediately recognized alisa, lev’s sister. even though the silver-haired boy was ginormous, he couldn’t hold his liquor very well, which resulted in you having to drag the giraffe of a human home after a party quite a few times. there, you met alisa.
wanting to go in for a hug with the beautiful blonde, you froze at once as you tried to process what you were seeing. tetsurou had an arm wrapped around her petite waist, the other one placed on her sharp jaw, as he softly pecked her lips.
lev excitedly started telling you about a new side job he got as a model and while you supported him with your whole heart and were genuinely proud of him for landing that job, you could only zero in on the sight in front of you. your eyes hyper focused on the way his large hands were gently grabbing her waist, your ears on the soft ‘how was your day?’ and flirty ‘better, now that you’re here’ exchanged.
putting on your best poker face and directing your attention to the excited titan beside you, your own reaction startled you. even more surprising was who you were jealous of. you did have a small crush on alisa at the start, who wouldn’t? she’s tall, beautiful, fun, loving, caring, alas she was way too similar to lev to develop a full-on crush on her. then, it dawned on you, that the one you were jealous of, was not tetsurou, but in fact, alisa.
of course, you thought your seatmate was attractive from the first moment you saw him, but how you managed to develop a crush on him without even realizing it, was beyond you. ugly, jealous thoughts made their way into your head about one of the most loveable people you met. those disgusting thoughts slithered their hands around your throat, trying to suffocate you and so you buried that small crush in the back of your mind.
after that encounter you kept your distance to the handsome male. it was better for you, your sanity and everyone involved. in no way were you ever going to go between a loving relationship because of your own selfish feelings.
for crying out loud, you didn’t even know kuroo that well while alisa was like a sister to you. however, you weren’t able to tune out the insecure voices in your head. of course, he liked tall, model-like women who resembled angels not only physically but also with their personality. who were you to compare yourself to her? not even you yourself liked who you were, so why would one of the most attractive guys you ever saw?
you deserved someone good, but alisa deserved the world, so you just wished that tetsurou was the best for her.
and while kuroo tetsurou was a lot of things, he wasn’t ignorant, so when you decided to sit down in another seat in the lecture a few times or made up some excuses as to why he couldn’t walk with you to your next seminar, he knew something was wrong.
which brings you back to right now, with you staring at your laptop, hoping that the boy you’ve been trying to avoid wouldn’t come over to check on you. alas, your luck was apparently all spent, because you could see a tall, dark figure drop themselves on the bench in front of you.
“y/n.”
at the low tone of his voice calling your name, you lifted your gaze from your laptop to look at the boy you were trying to stay clear of.
“hmm? oh, hey tetsurou. didn’t see you there.” bullshit, he thought.
“yeah, ’m here with alisa. just a quick break before she has her next lecture.” while saying that, kuroo focused on your expression, trying to gauge your emotions and maybe get a hint on why you were actively keeping him at arm’s length.
after taking a swift look in the direction the happy couple was sitting just a few minutes ago, you nodded and kept your eyes on your coffee.
“that’s nice, you should probably go back now though. don’t want you to waste precious date time”, you said cheerfully, but weren’t able to keep out the slightly bitter tone out of your voice. that’s exactly why you were trying to stay away from him. the sight of the merry couple only fueled your toxic thoughts about two people you cherished and even though you wished for them to be happy together, the insecurities deep inside you wouldn’t let you.
seeing the slight change in your voice and expression, kuroo cocked his head to the side. did he say the wrong thing?
“she’s already leaving, so i decided to catch up with you for a bit.”
fantastic.
“well,” you remarked while closing your laptop and starting to pack your things, “I also need to get going, was nice seeing you though.”
“i’ll walk you”, was in fact not what you wanted to hear. but the universe hated you for some reason. you looked back at him and waved your hand dismissingly, trying to speedily think of a reason why he couldn’t accompany you: “uh, you see, i, uh... i’m visiting my parents this weekend, so i’ll just take the train. ’m not going back to the dorms.”
even if kuroo would have been stupid and oblivious, which he was not, your hurried attempt at getting rid of him just confirmed all his suspicions. but the ex-captain wasn’t going to let you run away from him so easily.
“no problem, i’ll walk you to the train station. the field i practice volleyball in with lev and a few others is nearby. ‘was gonna head there anyway, let’s go.” this time, he didn’t let you enough time to object, so you were stuck grabbing your things and following him, regardless of what you wanted.
to your surprise, kuroo didn’t say a thing on the way to the train station. you expected him to force you into a whole debate about whether pluto was a planet or not, but he just stayed silent. was that a bit of your luck shining through, or was he angry?
not wanting to push your luck any longer, you stayed silent as well, as you waited for your train at the designated platform. guess you had to make a surprise visit to your hometown because of your little lie, but maybe that was exactly what you needed. some time away to clear your head.
but just as you got excited for the spontaneous trip, kuroo finally dropped what has been on his mind the whole walk or rather, the whole three weeks you’ve been running away from him as if he was on fire and you couldn’t wait to get away from him as far as possible.
“y/n. why are you avoiding me?”, he questioned, looking at the rails ahead, instead of you.
“w-what? i’m not, why would you think that?”, you quickly sputtered out, hardly able to convince yourself of your own lies.
tetsurou gave you a look of complete skepticism, quickly shutting down your protests. “don’t play dumb with me, ’m not stupid. i know you’re not sitting down way further in the back or running out of the lecture on accident. you’re doing this on purpose. even just a moment ago you didn’t want me to escort you. tell me why.”
luckily, the train arrived just on time, so you quickly hoped on with a fleeting 'see you next week' and hoped he would just assume you didn’t quite catch what he said because of the train.
he didn’t though. he knew that you heard him.
the short spontaneous weekend trip turned into you staying for almost two whole weeks because of a cold, so your mom wouldn’t let you return without someone taking care of you, not knowing you had some big news waiting for you once you got back.
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“we broke up.”
wou were currently in the library after returning to campus, trying to catch up on some lectures you missed, when alisa entered. together, you were walking around the english literature section, catching up when she dropped the bomb.
“wait, what? how? when? why? huh? what did he do?”, you asked dumbfounded, feeling bad about your two friends, who were so clearly in love, breaking up. but even more than that, you could feel disgust creep up your spine because deep down you knew you were sickly happy about the fact that kuroo was now single. what a shit fucking friend you were.
“relax”, alisa chuckled. “he didn’t do anything, we just kinda came to the agreement that we don’t love each other the same anymore. i felt like he was always distracted the last weeks we were together, always deep in thought, and i decided to concentrate on my graduation and career as a model. it was a great college relationship and i still care for him, we just… we broke up about a week ago.”
“well, as long as you’re both happy with the decision”, you sighed while picking ‘pride and prejudice’ by jane austen from a bookshelf, not feeling like such a piece of shit for being lowkey happy about it anymore, but you still knew you two would never work. even if the breakup was mutually decided, tetsurou was still her ex.
hearing alisa giggle, you turned your gaze from the book in your hand and wondered: “huh? why are you laughing?” the tall blonde only grinned and continued her way down the aisle. completely confused, you followed her with the book still in hand.
“what the fuck? kinda acting sus not gonna lie.”
“wow, I thought you had better jokes than that y/n”, she teased, sitting down at a nearby table.
breathing out some air out of your nose in mock anger, you sat down beside her, tipping your non-existent fedora. “sorry i’m not up to your comedy standards, m’lady.”
alisa laughed loudly before noticing the book you were still holding, her laughter turning into a knowing grin. once again, you shot her a confused look: “what is it with you today? your mood swings are confusing the shit outta me.”
“you know, that’s like one of tetsu’s favorite books.”
“what? 'pride and prejudice'?”, you inquired, puzzled. why was she telling you this? “are you like, having some post-breakup nostalgia or?”
she laughed once again, waving her manicured hand dismissingly and shaking her head: “it just kinda popped into my head. i never read it, but he once wanted to read it to me. it did not end well; i couldn’t take it seriously and had to laugh the whole time. he just gave up and sulked for the rest of the evening.”
“yep, definitely pbn”. the girl shoved your shoulder slightly while snickering before taking out her laptop and working on something, leaving you alone with your conflicted thoughts.
as fate would have it, you didn’t really talk to kuroo for the last two weeks of lectures. finals were catching up and you had a lot of exams, leaving you with no time to catch up with the tall boy. plus, you were still trying to avoid him. you weren’t about to give into temptation and try your luck with alisa’s ex, which was much easier if said temptation didn’t walk around looking fine directly in front of you.
but with the weekend starting, you agreed to go to a party with the haiba siblings to treat yourself to a break from typing essay after essay. it was obvious that kuroo would also be there and this time, you wouldn’t be able to avoid him. the running had finally caught up to you.
before the party, you decided to go to the library to work on one of your essays, but with how much work there was left, you simply forgot the time. at 10 p.m., your phone rang.
“hello?”
“girl? why aren’t you here yet? and why aren’t you answering our messages? we texted you like a million times”, levs’ questioning voice echoed through the speaker.
quickly checking the time and number of messages you got, you gasped: “oh god, so sorry! i was at the library working on my shitty marketing essay! ’m gonna be right there!”
ending the phone call, you quickly gathered your things and rushed to your dorms. stripping on the way to the bathroom in your one room apartment, you hopped into the shower, feeling as if you were trying to break the world record for the fastest shower known to men.
as you were stepping out of the shower a few minutes later, someone knocked at your door, startling you. did the haiba siblings come to pick you up? with a hasty ‘’m coming’, you hurried to the door in only a towel.
“hey, I just got out of the shower, I just need…” faltering in your sentence, you gripped your towel tighter, trying not to freak out. because there were no alisa and lev in sight. just kuroo tetsurou. while you were standing there. with only a towel on. fuck. “that’s uh… you’re not alisa and lev.”
“er… n-no, no i’m not”, kuroo stuttered out, at least having the decency to avert his eyes to the ceiling, realizing what you had or rather had not on after checking you out. collecting your composure, you shot him a tight-lipped smile and stepped aside to let him in.
“come in, I just need to get dressed and do my makeup. you can wait inside.”
walking past you, the dark-haired man pretended to scratch his head to hide his red ears and quickly surveyed your room. “that’s…”, breaking off his sentence instantly when his voice cracked, he cleared his throat before trying again. “nice room.”
while kuroo tried not to have a mental breakdown and remember what he came here for, you picked up your disregarded clothes from earlier of the floor, being mindful of not to flash the man, and made your way to your wardrobe, chucking in your dirty laundry and scanning your variety of clothes to pick out the most flattering outfit for the party. “uh, yeah, thanks. so, uh, what did you want? ee would’ve seen each other at the party later anyway.”
but there was no answer, making you frown. just as you wanted to turn around, calling his name in confusion, you felt a pair of strong arms wrap themselves around your waist loosely, causing you to choke out his name.
kuroo leaned his head down towards your neck, slowly inhaling the scent of your strawberry bodywash before sighing contently. his soft, plump lips slowly trailed up to your ear, creating goosebumps on their way, before lowly murmuring: “you smell delicious. i could eat you up.”
you could feel yourself shiver at the low timbre of his voice and the indication of his words, as your heart rate picked up to the point you had the feeling as though you were going to die right then and there. how did his demeanor change so suddenly? it seemed as if you were in a room with a completely different person.
the ex-captain smugly grinned as he felt your breath quicken and chest heave without him even doing much, tightening one arm around your waist, while his large hand on the other arm splayed itself on your stomach, slowly sliding down towards where you wanted him. “hm? can I do that baby?”
just as quickly as the thoughts of ‘stop, this is so wrong. what about alisa?’ appeared in your mind, they immediately disappeared with the sweet melody of kuroo calling you baby.
not being able to keep a little whine from slipping out at the pet name, you nodded, your cheeks unbearably hot. but that wasn’t enough for him. tetsurou wanted your verbal consent, even if his half-hard cock already slightly twitched at the small noise you let out without him even touching you properly, screaming at him to finally fuck you.
avoiding the area, you wanted him to touch the most, his hand grabbed your thigh, causing you to squeeze your legs together in search of relief. he tsked at your lack of words and lightly spanked your thigh before tightening his grip around the fat, earning him a surprised squeak from you. “no, use your big girl words baby. i want to hear it.”
the instant tetsurou startled you with the spank, you hurriedly grabbed onto his forearms, lightly digging your nails into the muscles. already, everything was getting too much. his smooth voice seducing you, his dominant touch jumbling up your brain, his urgent need to hear your consent, his pleasant scent of a mix of his cologne, mint and husk surrounding you. him, him, him. you wanted more. you needed more. the slick between your legs grew embarrassingly fast, smearing on the inside of your thighs, showing off kuroo’s effect on you evidently.
“please… please touch me tetsu', I need it”, you whimpered out impatiently, making him close his eyes to stop himself from cumming already, your needy voice going straight to his dick standing at full attention. and even though the menace in him wanted to tease you and hear you beg more; he knew that he didn’t have the willpower to deny himself of having you any longer.
as you felt the tall male finally place his hand underneath your towel and cup your pussy, your head rolled back onto his shoulder, giving him full access to your neck. while dragging his middle and index finger through your folds leisurely, his lips and tongue placed hungry kisses on your neck.
“fuck, angel, you’re soaking wet. Is that all because of me, hmm?”, he lowly murmured against your neck, while his fingers simultaneously slowly circled your clit. you couldn’t stop your eyes from lolling to the back of your head or the small whimper that left you, even though the ‘angel’ left a bitter taste in your mouth. as much as the pet name made your stomach all tingly, you always compared alisa to an angel, so it didn’t quite sit well to be called that by her own ex.
but as you felt his middle finger enter you, all thoughts flew out of your head. The only thing on your mind were the raspy praises against your neck and his finger moving at a torturous pace inside you.
“please tetsu', more, I need more”, you complained whiny, because as much as it was all overwhelming, it also wasn’t enough. kuroo could only grin at your eagerness, but couldn’t blame you, since his own patience was speedily wearing thin.
with an uttered ‘everything for you angel’, he added his index finger into the mix, curling the two digits and, not wasting a moment, pumping them into you at a rapid pace, eliciting a quiet moan out of you. the ex-captain noted that you weren’t much of a moaner and mentally made it a challenge to have you crying for him by the end of the night. so, without much warning, his long, thick fingers started hammering against your g-spot while his thumb circled your clit at the same time, making you squeeze your eyes shut with your mouth opening in a silent scream, your hands searching for stability on the closet in front of you.
“c’mon, y/n, baby, i know you want it, fucking give it to me. ‘been fantasizing about this so long, just wanna make you feel good and fall apart for me. show me how much of a good girl you are.” his smooth voice flowed into your ear, seducing you to fully give into him. you felt as if you were being lured by satan himself and you were just a weak little human, not nearly strong enough to resist the whisper of the devil.
with a series of soft, high-pitched moans, you came on his fingers without any warning, your legs giving out at the intensity of it all. tetsurou only tightened his arm around your waist, picking you up without any trouble, making you clench around nothing at his display of effortless strength as he withdrew his fingers from your dripping hole. you thought you heard a small ‘good girl’, but you couldn’t tell for sure with the way you were still floating on cloud nine after he brought you to your orgasm that quickly.
panting and shivering at the goosebumps erupting, you lifted your gaze up at him as he placed you on your bed, only to find him already staring at you with low lids and completely black eyes, the beautiful hazel color of his eyes lost in all the lust and desire that took over his expression.
refusing to break eye-contact, kuroo lifted his with your essence-soaked fingers to his plush lips, wrapping them around the digits and sucking lewdly at them. once again, you felt yourself clench around nothing, rubbing your thighs against each other to get some relief, when you saw his eyes roll back as he tasted you.
the next thing you knew, your back hit the bed with the broad man lying between your spread legs, making you yelp. you could feel the atmosphere around tetsurou change once again. he was a lot more feral than he was before, as if his patience were running out.
his biceps wrapped around your plush thighs, holding you in place since the feeling of his breath against your cunt made your hips twitch up at their own accord, exposing the strong want you had for the man between your legs.
“’m gonna fucking wreck you angel”, he growled against your slit, before diving right in, licking and sucking messily at your clit, your pussy lips, everywhere he could reach. and as much as it shouldn’t feel pleasurable with him being as aggressive as he was, it felt fucking heavenly. you couldn’t help but arch your back, hands flying down to tangle in his messy rooster hair and tugging at the surprisingly soft strands, causing him to moan hoarsely against your sensitive pussy, the vibrations only egging you on. something about kuroo tetsurou losing his usual provocative, teasing demeanor as he ate you out felt so raw and animalistic, that it made your head spin and toes curl.
his large hand crept up your torso and he finally removed the towel that barely hid your breasts from him before palming one, drawing a content sigh out of you at the attention. but as much as he enjoyed listening to you whine and sigh because of the pleasure he was causing you, he wanted, no, needed to hear how much you wanted this, how much you wanted him.
“tell me how it feels angel, tell me how good it feels. ‘wanna hear your pretty voice, baby”, he huskily mumbled against your clit, making you arch your back at the delicious vibrations echoing through your core. but as much as you enjoyed hearing his dirty talk, you felt insecure about yours not turning him on.
preparing yourself mentally as good as you managed with the way he ate you out like a man starved, you allowed yourself a glance down only to see him expectantly observing you. the erotic sight only coaxed another high-pitched whine out of you, your head lolling back against your pillow.
at the next harsh suck on your sensitive bundle of nerves, your hips thrusted up against his skilled tongue and you finally gave in to your desire of wanting to tell him how good he was making you feel. only him.
“fuck, tetsu', d-don’t stop. feels so good, you feel so good, only you, please, please, please”, you needily moaned while grinding your hips up, simultaneously pushing his head deeper into your pussy and if kuroo had any self-control left, it was definitely gone now.
his toned biceps tightened around your thighs. his large hands squeezed your breast and hip harshly, leaving bruises for you to discover tomorrow. his able tongue messily switched between being shoved deep inside you and swirling your clit and you could feel the bed shake with how forceful he was humping the bed just from eating you out and hearing you talk like that. every little thing contributed to your orgasm washing over you like a tsunami. you were fairly sure you even blacked out for a few seconds because the next time you focused your attention back on tetsurou, he was frantically unbuttoning his jeans, with his shirt already off, whipping out his cock.
you felt your eyes widen as well as your pussy clench, you couldn’t remember the last time you were this horny, but you also weren’t sure how the fuck you were supposed to fit a cock this big and girthy inside you. meanwhile kuroo took off his boxers and contently sighed as he finally started stroking himself, giving himself some relief but it wasn’t enough. not by a long shot.
zoning in on your face once again - sweaty, low lidded eyes, blown out pupils- the impatient boy leaned down and kissed you for the first time that evening. after everything that just transpired between you two, the kiss definitely felt the most intimate, but it was also what you were craving the most from tetsurou for months now.
you didn’t know how to possibly express all the emotions you were currently overwhelmed with, so you tried to translate it all through the kiss. kissing back harder, all teeth and tongue, wrapping your arms tightly around his neck, pulling him impossibly closer, pressing your thighs against his hips, hoping it was enough to convey what you wanted to say.
apparently, it was, because you could hear kuroo lowly growl against your lips before starting to dig his fingers into your hips and grind against you, finally letting you feel him where you needed him the most.
“n-not enough, tetsu'”, you eagerly whined, raising your hips, hoping it was enough to convince him to finally fuck you like you craved him to. but as thin as his patience was at the moment, kuroo tetsurou would not be kuroo tetsurou without his teasing antics.
he slyly grinned, pressing feather-light kisses down from your lips to your throat, making his way to your breasts, where he teasingly kitten-licked your nipples a few times, letting you think you were finally getting what you wanted before he raised his head and stared you down with his almost pitch-black eyes. “mmm, I know you can do better than that kitten”, he gruffly remarked while continuing to grind against you slowly, making you jerk and mewl every time you felt the head of his cock bump against your clit. “what do you want me to do, baby?”
how he still had it in him to tease and deny you, was beyond you, because you were on the edge of breaking down from how bad you wanted him. “’want you to fuck me, tetsu'”, you confidently said while gazing into his eyes, or at least, you tried to sound confident, but you were only able to whine and moan at this point.
kuroo closed his eyes and felt himself twitch against your pussy. you were going to be the death of him. sitting back up on his knees, he grabbed his cock and lined it up with your entrance, making you spread your legs automatically wider at the sight.
with one sharp snap of his hips, you both groaned simultaneously, your groan high-pitched, his low and guttural, at the feeling you’ve both been craving for. “fuck, you’re on birth control, right?”, he asked, straining himself as to not just start pounding you into oblivion or cum right on the spot.
“yes, shit”, you breathlessly answered, putting your hands against his toned abdomen as to let him know to wait, which only made him clench his abs at the feeling of your soft hands on his exposed skin. “j-just give me a sec, need a moment”, you murmured avoiding eye contact, suddenly shy at the fact that you were just lying there with kuroo balls deep inside you.
sensing your mood shift, the tall male grinned his cheshire-grin at you and teasingly remarked: “why? am i too big for you, huh?”, hoping it’d make you laugh and relax a bit, soon realizing that the idea completely back-fired on him.
as you started to laugh at his arrogant remark, hitting his abs slightly and telling him to shut up, your core clenched in-sync with your laughter, making you freeze at the sudden loud, almost pornographic moan escaping tetsurou’s lips.
looking up at him, you finally realized how much he was holding back as to not hurt you or make you uncomfortable. the handsome boys’ wild hair was already sticking to the sweat forming on his forehead, his jaw clenched painfully, nostrils flaring, eyebrows furrowed, biceps bulging with how hard he was gripping the sheets beside your hips to restrain himself. the thought of him wanting to fuck you so bad but holding back for your pleasure and well-being, was enough to make you clench down on him again, rolling your hips up against his and declaring: “’m ready, tetsu'. please, f-fuck me”.
with your words and the grinding of your hips, kuroo really couldn’t hold back the little stutter his hips did against yours but fuck, was he embarrassed by it. he felt like a teenager, touching real boobs for the first time all over again, knowing he wouldn’t last long. not with how long he had fantasized about this and with how you reacted to his every move and touch, squeezing him so tight, he felt like he wouldn’t even be able to move.
“’m gonna break you”, and with those final words, his large, veiny hands gripped your hips in a bruising, vice grip, pulling out so only his tip was inside your messy, drooling cunt, before snapping right back in, making you choke on your breath at the impact.
as much as kuroo wanted to bust inside you right then and there, the strong urge to see you lose yourself on his cock while he ruined every other man for you was much more prominent. so, the ex-captain rutted in your pussy like his life depended on it, wanting your moans and mewls and whines to never stop. there was so much that was running through his head while being empty at the same time. the only thought was to bring you both to earth-shattering orgasms, but he also wanted to spit in your mouth, choke you, spank your thighs and ass till you wouldn’t be able to sit tomorrow. he wanted to come on your thighs, your tits, face, but he also wanted to breed you.
you two were definitely way too young for children but he couldn’t get the mental image of you, stuffed with his cum with it running down your legs out of his mind, only making it harder for him not to cum immediately.
but you weren’t doing better either. the pace that kuroo was fucking you at, had you seeing stars, riding you up higher on the bed with every thrust and your eyes rolling to the back of your head. you gripped the sheets, his hands, his forearms, your breasts, anything, to try to stabilize yourself as you approached your high embarrassingly fast without your clit even being touched.
just as the thought crossed your mind, you felt tetsus’ calloused fingertips, from years of playing volleyball, circle your clit, causing you to throw your head back with your lips open in a silent scream.
“fuck, you’re so fucking tight kitten, so much better than i ever imagined. cum for me, wanna feel you cream on my fat cock, wanna see you lose your mind baby, give it to me”. at this point, he basically started rambling on about how hot and tight you were, how he wanted you to cum around his cock so badly, how you were gonna make him cum so hard, how you were making such a mess for him, what a good girl you were.
just as you felt yourself almost falling over the edge at the added stimulus to your clit and the filthy praises that were coming out of his mouth, you yanked the boy down by his arm, wrapping your arms around him firmly and kissing him so hard, you were sure you both would have bruised lips later.
with the new position and the intimacy of being pressed up against each other, one more thrust, and you were gone. cumming around his cock so hard, you couldn’t remember the last time someone made you cum that hard, if ever.
the pornographic moans of his name along with some ‘fuck’s and ‘so good’s, the jerking of your body against his and the vice-grip of your pussy on his dick as you came. it was all too much for the poor boy who didn’t even cum once the whole time, while you already had three orgasms under your belt. the last straw was your quiet, little ‘cum inside tetsu', want you to fill me up’ and so, a few short, sloppy thrusts later, kuroo buried his face in your neck, groaning loudly as he came inside, spurting hot, white cum against your abused walls.
the feeling of being filled up to the hilt by kuroo tetsurou was intoxicating. you whined, wrapping your legs around his hips, caging him in so he couldn’t pull out, not wanting the moment to end.
you both lied there, trying to catch your breath. as he pulled out after a few moments and got up to go grab a towel to clean you up, your hand caught his. “don’t go, where are you going?”, you whined needily, wanting to cuddle, to worn-out to care about the mess gushing out of your hole onto the bed sheets.
chuckling, the tall boy leaned down, kissing your forehead: “’m not going anywhere angel, I’m just gonna grab a towel and clean you up”. with that he retreated to the bathroom in search of a towel to use.
you, on the other hand, suddenly sobered up from your drunk-on-lust high at the pet name, making you realize what you just did. fuck, you just banged alisa’s ex-boyfriend. they weren’t even broken off for that long and you already betrayed her.
feeling like a bad friend and complete whore, you didn’t even register said ex-boyfriend was back, making you flinch at the sudden contact of your sensitive pussy with the wet, rough towel.
“relax baby, it’s just me”, he teasingly chuckled, while cleaning you up. when he didn’t hear you chuckle or bite back at his teasing, his expression morphed into a frown, lifting his gaze from your core to your face. “what’s wrong?”
“nothing, thanks.” but of course, you were lying. the panic that slowly settled in your chest was threatening to suffocate you. hell, you weren’t even able to look at him properly.
you felt kuroo grab your chin with his fingers gently, turning your head so you had to look at him. tetsurou was completely serious, he only hoped you weren’t regretting what just transpired between you two, as he repeated: “what’s. wrong?”, emphasizing those two words so you knew there was no point in lying.
feeling your eyes water up, you cursed yourself for showing weakness, since you weren’t one to cry often, especially in front of other people. “what are we going to tell alisa?”
that caught him off guard. “alisa?”, he repeated questioningly, as if he didn’t know what you meant. how could he not know? was he that stupid?
you sat up, rubbing at your eyes frantically with the rising anger inside your chest. “yeah, alisa. your ex. the one that’s like a sister to me. how am I supposed to look her in the eyes after what we just did?”
kuroo wasn’t stupid. you could vouch for that any day. you saw him in your lecture, and you had studied a lot with him, but right now, you were sure he was the dumbest person you ever knew, even beating lev. because even after explaining, he still only looked at you with a confused gaze, saying: “i don’t quite follow?”
groaning, you ran your hands through your hair in frustration, declaring: “you’re really smart, but you’re being so fucking dumb right now. how the fuck am I supposed to talk to one of my closest friends after I fucked her ex-boyfriend, who she loved by the way, not even that long after they broke up?”
finally, it clicked in kuroo’s brain. but the last thing you expected, was to hear him laugh. your head snapped up at the sound, glaring at him you almost growled: “what the fuck’s so funny, you fucking bedhead?”
“oh wow, throwing in the insults huh?”, he said between chuckles. “it’s funny because alisa was the one who encouraged me to come here tonight, though I don’t think she wanted us to outright fuck but, you know.”
what now?
“what do you mean she encouraged you to come here?”, you interrogated perplexed. suddenly he was acting all shy and sheepish, rubbing the back of his neck with his big hand, avoiding your eyes.
“well… we’re still friends, so we were talking about our lectures a week ago and she suddenly mentioned how you also were a fan of 'pride and rejudice'. i just… got kinda excited at that, since alisa wasn’t really interested in things like that, so i started asking her about it. she then called me out on my crush on you, saying she already knows why i was so distracted the weeks leading up to our break-up, thinking about you.”
while listening, your anger slowly morphed into nervousness at kuroo openly admitting he also had a crush on you, but you wanted him to finish his story before addressing the elephant in the room.
“i apologized immediately, thinking she was angry at me, but you know her. she was so sweet, saying she would only be happier if it worked out between us. after, she tried to set us up to talk to each other, but you avoided me like the plague, so she told me to come here before the party since you were running late, to confront you and settle it once and for all but uh…”, he sheepishly smiled, “i kinda got distracted when you opened the door in only a towel, so… that didn’t go as planned.”
sitting with your mouth agape in a ‘o’, your brain tried to process all the information, not knowing what to say to his confession and explanation.
“soooo… she’s not gonna hate me and cancel our friendship?”, you carefully pressed, just to be sure. “no, I don’t think she will”, he chortled.
“oh.”
with that, the room was suddenly extremely silent, making you and kuroo even more nervous. clearing his throat, he couldn’t take the silence anymore. “are you gonna give me an answer to my confession, or am I like, totally embarrassing myself right now?”
“uh, no, yeah”, you softly giggled at his obvious anxiousness. taking his face between your hands, you looked right into his hazel eyes in the dim lighting, before gently smiling at him.
“i like you too, nerd.”
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bonus:
the next morning, you woke up to your phone aggressively vibrating on your nightstand beside your bed. you blindly reached out, picking up the call without even opening your eyes, clearly still half-asleep.
“hello?”, you groggily asked your caller, wondering who the fuck was calling you this early, when lev’s voice filled your ear. “y/n? hey, we we’re worried about you yesterday. why didn’t you show up? it was so much fun”, the big, over-grown baby whined.
looking down at the reason you weren’t able to attend the party sleeping soundly with his head on your chest, you smiled, carding your fingers softly through his raven-black hair.
“just… reasons”.
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742 notes · View notes
boldlyvoid · 3 years
Text
Intro and masterlist
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✨about me ✨
this is a mature blog, I trust all minors to be responsible and avoid everything marked NSFW!
NSFW sideblog: @pervstash-spencer
Hi! my name is emily, I'm 23 she/they
Capricorn, bisexual, non-binary, autistic, and I have fibromyalgia ✌🏻 overall just a fun time y'know.
ao3
i love: supernatural, star trek, marvel movies, criminal minds, this is us and grey's anatomy !!
Accepting requests for Spencer Reid x Reader fics currently
all my tags are listed below if you want to see other posts about said fics, also here is my Spotify for the fics <3
Dad!spencer Masterlist
First times Masterlist**
all links to my fics below the cut!
Updated: July 28th, 2021
** for smut
~~ for angst
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Spencer Reid x Reader fics
Hypothetically**~ Ao3 | Tumblr -- 27 chapters, complete. 89k
reader and Spencer were friends in kindergarten, she watched him grow up and explore the world while she was still trying to catch up to him. now that they work together, they fall in love incredibly fast.
friends to lovers, case of the week style story
touch me**~ Ao3 | Tumblr 5.8k
Spencer is incredibly touch-starved and hard on himself since coming home from prison. Luckily, the medical examiner in this small town is really good at reading people, and exactly what he needs.
amethyst you so much P1 Ao3 | Tumblr 6.4k
Spencer has had a crush on Y/N since she started working at the bau. She only ever works the night shift after a case, handling all the aftermath gracefully. one night, Spencer stays back and they strike up a conversation about rocks, causing their feelings to dig a little deeper.
of quartz i will P2** Ao3 | Tumblr 6K
after 2 years of dating, Spencer decides it's finally time to get Y/N something to match her Amethyst bracelet.
Amoreena**~ Ao3 | Tumblr Completed 83k
Heaven is a real place and it's located exactly 14.6 miles away from the FBI, Quantico Headquarters. Off behind a small park, under a fantastical willow tree surrounded by wildflowers, in every colour young minds can imagine.
Don't forget, heaven also comes with angels.
Seven* Tumblr WIP
Summary: Spencer’s been married to Y/N for 7 years now, they have 7 children together and each one is going through something different. Spencer’s always wanted to be the best dad, now he gets to figure out how to be.
the guy at the rock show Ao3 | Tumblr 5.6K
Y/N lost their parents when they were 17, finding a new home and solace in Penelope Garcia and taking the Garcia name. They're the top forensic specialist in D.C, in a band and they drive a motorcycle... not to mention they are madly in love with the cute doctor who works with their sister.
journey to Camelot** Ao3 | Tumblr 3.8K
When Penelope introduces Spencer to online games, he expects to be spending his nights alone. Yet, somehow every time he comes back from a bad case, he logs on to chat with the ever so lovely user FairlyGwen and getting a lot more than just a helpful tip from her.
Exploration** Ao3 | Tumblr 4.7K
request: season1/2 spencer walking in on reader while she's watching porn in their shared hotel room
Expedition** Tumblr 1.2K
Summary: there's a first time for everything... including joining the mile high club with your boyfriend on the work jet.
10 Days Ao3 | Tumblr 1.4K
it's spencer's first father's day and he's extremely emotional about the little love of his life that he's only just met. he spends the day with his baby, Edwin, and his wife, crying and happy about how wonderful new little lives are.
ain't it fun?** Ao3 | Tumblr Masterlist 11K
reader just needs an NA meeting before they have a meltdown, they end up with the best friend they could ever make.
I'm not kidding!** Tumblr 6K
Spencer keeps getting little notes from a secret admirer, they're nice and sweet at first as they tease him with their crush until she's sending him notes about all the dirty things she wants to do to him
Perfect Timing** Tumblr 1K
spencer and reader have been spending the last month together in the same hotel room during a pretty brutal case. tension has been rising and she's completely in love with him.
what happens when they both think the other won't be back for a while and they want to shower?
Redamancy** Tumblr 5.4K
the co-op librarian at the FBI Academy has been secretly crushing on the smartest agent in the Bureau, TA, Doctor Spencer Reid, and he's been crushing on her too.
Being Neighbourly** Tumblr 1.9K
Request: reader is Spencers neighbour and she can hear him masturbating every night that he's home how do you have her deal with that?
Professional Hair Dresser (Ph.D)** Tumblr 6.4K
summary: after Spencer's knee injury, he starts visiting a salon every week to get his hair washed
36 Questions to Fall in Love Tumblr 8K
Summary: When Derek bets Spencer that he cant make someone fall in love with him in a week, he doesn’t expect Spencer to marry the girl the next day
New Romantics** Tumblr 23k
Summary: She needs help studying for her Case Exercises at the Academy, He needs a date for the annual Banquet... they just so happen to be neighbours who aren't afraid to lend a helping hand, or in this case, a helping kiss.
Million Dollar Man** | Tumblr WIP 5k so far
summary: Spencer's therapist recommended he branch out and meet new people who don't want to talk about his work... she didn't expect him to sign up for a Sugar Daddy website.
Sugar, Honey, Ice Tea** | Y/N version | 1-4, 5-9, Epilogue 25.6k
Summary: Fix-it-fic: Dr. Y/L/N and Savannah Hayes have been best friends since their medical internship at Bethesda General. When she receives a frantic call that Derek's best friend is being transferred to the prison she works at, an unlikely friendship bubbles.
Eventually falling head over heels for the innocent man.
Warnings: Implied/Referenced Rape/Non-con, Prison, Prison Violence, Assault, Blood, Depression, Murder, Self-Hatred, Hurt Spencer Reid, Canon-Typical Violence, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Drug Addiction, References to Drugs, Drug Use, Idiots in Love, Mutual Pining, Romantic Tension, Forbidden Love, Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Strangers to Lovers, Requited Love, Falling In Love, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Slow Burn, Eventual Smut, past abusive relationship, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault
Spencer x Ethan
Ruin it.** Tumblr 5.4K
Summary: Spencer never had sleepovers as a kid, so now that he's an adult he's always sleeping over at Ethan's house, ad he'll take any excuse to crawl into bed beside him.
Warnings: mutual pining, love concessions, blowjobs, handjobs, anal sex (both top and bottom spencer in this), childhood friends to lovers
400 Celebration fics
Reid Me Tumblr 2.5K
Spencer has noticed a beautiful woman at a spirituality booth at the farmers market every Saturday for almost a whole year now. he finally asks her to give him a reading.
mystery of love Tumblr 700
Spencer surprises his wife with a trip to Italy.
Spy Kids Tumblr 900
Spencer and Y/N's kids think that they are secretly spies and request a mission story before bed.
a father's greatest weakness Tumblr 1K
Princess Y/N is betrothed to the Viking king in an effort by her father to keep the peace between their countries, he doesn't expect her to join in the fight to free Scottland.
Luke x Reader
Best Dad Ever 2.8K
Request: angst with a happy ending, reader and luke have been divorced for a few years but have a child, she tries and tries to fall out of love with him but he's around so often that she can't
Spencer x OC
Sugar Honey Ice Tea** Ao3 | WIP 9/10 chapters complete 25.6K
Fix-it-fic: Dr. Beth Pattinson and Savannah Hayes have been best friends since their medical internship at Bethesda General. When she receives a frantic call that Derek's best friend is being transferred to the prison she works at, an unlikely friendship bubbles.
Eventually falling head over heels for the innocent man.
Intro to Criminal Minds: Why They Did It Ao3 | Tumblr WIP 6K+
Spencer is teaching a 7-week seminar on the most interesting criminal cases, explaining their actions to understand why they took place. Only, not everyone in the audience is a student.
Criminal Minds x Mindhunter AU
Spencer x OC Peggy Carr
Franklin x Reader
Voulez-Vouz** | 3.2k
Summary: in a small town, everyone knows each other… or at least they think they do.
Warnings: porn with plot, smut, Dom reader, Sub!Perv!franklin, making out, teasing, face sitting, oral (female and male), hand jobs, overstimulation, prostate message, multiple orgasms, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, let me know if I forgot anything.
Chip x Reader
forever is the sweetest con** | 6.2K
Summary: Reader’s dad is a carpenter; sometimes he takes on apprentices and sometimes, if they’re lucky, they get his daughter’s number at the end of their training. Chip Taylor, however, hits the jackpot when her father invites him over for one of her homecooked meals.
Warnings: reader’s mom passed away, mentions of parental death, strangers to lovers, random acts of kindness, mutual pining, falling in love, steamy make-outs, oral sex (male and female receiving), fingering, penetrative sex, unprotected sex, creampie, dirty talk, sub!chip, food mentions, praise, love confessions.
Raymond x Reader
Alone Together ** | 2.4K
Summary: Raymond moves into a haunted house and ends up sleeping with the ghost who lives there... only he doesn't know that when you fuck a ghost you also become one.
Warnings: details of suicide and murder, blowjobs, pegging, bottom!raymond, top!reader, becoming a ghost, major character death.
Star Trek Masterlist
Star Wars fix it fic
Supernatural masterlist
thanks for all the love, as always,
-Emily <3
500 notes · View notes
kelieah · 3 years
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can’t help it (arvin russell x reader)
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request (summary): @dhtomholland​ : hi !! i have an arvin request... what if arvin easily gets jealous when boys hit on y/n at school or jus try to talk to her and it was cute at first but y/n get annoyed at some point which leads to a small fight but arvin makes it up to her w flowers and telling her he jus wants to protect her 🥺🥺🥺
word count: 1.7k
warnings: language ofc, angst, fluff
edited: i also kinda forgot halfway through writing this that u requested he wanted to protect, i changed that up a bit sorry !!! also why the fuck am is my gifs not loading grrr
a/n: awwee this requesttt,, sorry for the late response. i’m not as quick as i used to be w requests 
main masterlist | arvin russell masterlist
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You like Arvin a lot, that’s something you couldn’t deny. But lord, ever since you started dating this boy you don’t think you could ever get used to his temper and overprotective attitude. You appreciated it, of course, it’s just that there were many times when he’d let it get the best of him.
There was this one time he was picking you up from school, but you weren’t at the front like you usually were. So he decides to park and walk to your locker to see if you were there. You’re there, but with the company of someone else. His heart rate spikes at the sight of someone, or to be more specific, some candy-ass boy talking to you. He slowly walks over, not wanting to startle the both of you, and listens in on the conversation.
“I- I could help ya with the homework for math class. If y- you want of course,” the sweet, frail boy whose name is Cole, offers you.
You smile softly and nod while closing your lockers, “I would appreciate that a lot! I think I’m free—”
Before you could even finish your sentence you notice Cole huddle in fear before you. “Hi,” you hear a familiar voice from behind you. He wraps his arms around your waist and places his chin upon your shoulder.
“Oh, hey Arvin,” you murmur softly and glance over at him. You know what he’s up to so you push him off slightly to return to your conversation with the other boy.
“Uhm, h- hello there. A- Arvin,” Cole mutters and cowers underneath Arvin’s piercing glare. 
You huff and shove your boyfriend aside. “Don’t mind him, like I was saying. I think I can after Sunday Mass, by the trees and tables if that’s alright?”
He gulps as he averts his eyes back and forth between the both of you. “Y- Yeah, is that okay?”
“I just said it’s alright—?” you stifle a laugh until you get cut off.
“Yeah, just studying though. If she tells me otherwise, I’ll cut your—'' Arvin threatens, causing every ounce of color from Cole’s face to drain.
“I’ll see you Sunday, Cole! Bye!” you immediately pull Arvin away and squeeze his hand harshly. “What is the matter with you!?”
“What?” he asks cluelessly and looks back at Cole who had already run off in complete fear and embarrassment.
“That poor boy. He’s just asking to study with me, that’s all,” you smack his arm.
He scoffs and shrugs you off. “Doll, I know you’re dull sometimes but c’mon. Every boy in the school probably wants you. Even boys like him, they just got some type of strategy or some shit,” he runs a hand through his hair and avoids your piercing glare. “Dull? First off, fuck you. Second, every boy? Arvin, grow up baby. I’m yours, and only yours. M’ pretty damn sure everyone knows that. Now fucking apologize or else I’m walking home,” you stop in your tracks and cross your arms. 
He stops as well and turns towards you, giving you a blank expression. You remain firm and raise an eyebrow at him, almost testing him to try you. “Sweetcakes, m’ sorry,” he groans and takes a step towards you.
You take a step back and raise both your eyebrows, continuing to stay stubborn. “Sorry, what?”
He takes one more look at you and wavers in defeat. He trudges over to you and falls into your arms, stuffing his face in your neck. You stifle a laugh and hold him up, hugging him close. “I’m sorry for threatening that stupid boy with dumb glasses. I just really like you and don’t want nobody touchin’ my girl. Nobody. Not even God. I’m sorry! I’m sorry. I won’t get jealous or overprotective again,” he drags out his words and whines against your skin.
You throw your head back and giggle. “Arvin! Okay, okay. You big softie. Apology accepted stupid. But, you better apologize to him too, okay?” you push him off you and glance into his eyes.
“Yeah, yeah. Kiss?” he pouts and leans towards your face. You roll your eyes and oblige, pecking his lips. You walk off towards his car and he let out another whine, complaining about how the kiss was too short.
You love how you’re able to bring out this vulnerable and softer side to Arvin. You’re lucky enough that he even started dating you. It shock you that the boy had emotions. You’re only partly joking about that. It’s a true miracle the way you make him fall to his knees for you. You both couldn’t get enough of each other. Though, there were days where Arvin really got on your nerves.
He just promised the other day to not get too jealous or overprotective, didn’t he? Yet, here is now cursing out the same boy who helped you with your studies behind the school’s building. “What the fuck do you want with her? Huh? I saw the way you look at her, don’t you lie to me boy damnit!” he raises his voice at Cole.
Cole stumbles back and hits the wall as Arvin holds his collar, “I- I swear it’s nothing like that Arvin! I promise, I’m just helping her out that’s all! W- We’re just classmates, I’d never try to meddle. Please man!” he begins to weep covering his face as Arvin raises his fist.
“Arvin Eugene Russell!” the two boys hear a louder voice from behind them. There you stand with an infuriated expression. Your jaw clenched your face red and your hands on your hips. 
Arvin mutters a handful of curses underneath his breath and lets go of Cole reluctantly. Cole plops down on the floor and hugs his knees to his chest as he watches the argument unravel between you and Arvin.
“Doll, this isn’t what it looks like. I was just lecturing him I swear—” Arvin holds his hands up in defense.
You completely ignore his attempts to redeem himself and brush past him, helping Cole up. “I am so sorry, are you okay?” you ask softly.
He wipes away his tears and nods in response. “Y- Yeah I’m okay, thank you. I should probably go now. I’ve caused enough problems,” he pulls away from your grasp and plays with his hands.
“No, you haven’t caused anything. I think he should go now,” you turn your head towards Arvin and send him a warning glare. He stares at you back in disbelief and clenches his jaw. You both stare at each other for a little longer, as if you were both challenging eachother to see who would back down. Arvin’s the first to crack. He scoffs and turns sharply on his heel, making his way back to his car.
“I- I’m so sorry, Y/n,” Cole bubbles sadly and wipes the sweat beads off his forehead. “I really am.” “Don’t be stupid, you’re fine. It’s my damn boyfriend’s problem, not ours. Come on, let’s go grab some ice cream,” you sigh and walk ahead, leaving him scrambling to catch up with you.
After the nice hangout with your newly made friend, he walked you home and apologized once more which almost made you slap the boy. Though it was calming to spend time with a friend other than your boyfriend, you still couldn’t believe Arvin’s recent behavior. 
You know he can get overprotective, but jealousy is something you never expected. You take your mind off of him once again by doing some homework until your peace is interrupted by the sound of loud knocks on your front door. “I’m coming! Jesus,” you yell frustatingly as the pounding on your poor wood gets louder. You open the door to see Arvin with a guilty expression, a heap of flowers in one hand and a dozen of pop in the other. You raise an eyebrow at him and lean against your doorway.
Your silence pushes him to speak up. “Look, I’m. I- I’m,” he grumbles out and avoids your gaze, staring at the ground.
“I’m?” you decide to poke at him and cross your arms, enjoying the entertainment in front of you.
“I didn’t mean to,” he huffs and holds out the things he brought, looking back at you.
Your face now remains unamused. “Come again?”
“Christ, woman,” he rolls his eyes and lets out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry. I’m fucking sorry I almost beat the kid. I just hated the way his beady little shit eyes were staring at you. I coulda sworn the fucker was going to take you from me. I don’t want anyone to take you from me. I mean I know you’re not mine— No you’re mine, but not in a possessive way or something. I don’t know. I’m trying here, hell. I just, I’m just scared one day you’re gonna find someone better than some ditz like me,” he lets the bottled up feelings spill out his mouth like word vomit.
You look at him surprised and purse your lips, examining his face. He finally makes eye-contact with you and smiles weakly. You stifle a laugh and pull him into a bone-crushing hug that causes him to let out a soft gasp. He places down the flowers and pop, wrapping his arms around you instinctively. “Now you listen here fool, like I’ve said a million times. I’m yours, okay? I know I ain’t your object, and I’m glad you know that too. But nobody is gonna take me from you. Nobody, not even Paul Anka,” you tease quietly, earning a chuckle from him that makes you smile in content. “Wanna know why?”
He presses a warm kiss against your shoulder and sighs, “Why?”
“Cus I love your dumbass,” you murmur into his ear and rub his back comfortingly.
He tenses a bit and smiles happily, stuffing his face in your neck. “I love you too,” he mumbles incoherently into your skin. 
You giggle and run a hand through his hair, massaging his scalp. “Can you promise me not to do anythin’ like that again?”
“No,” he admits and begins to sway your body as he holds you.
You whine breathlessly and pull away to look at him. “Arvin! Why the hell not?”
He grins cheekily and shrugs nonchalantly, “Because I can’t help it.”
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najatheangel · 3 years
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genre: fluff, drama, and comedy. high school au!
pairing: Choi San x Reader
author's note: apart of the Ateez Summer Collab hosted by @bangchan-fairy My first official posted collab please let me know what you guys think. Enjoy your summer! ✨
word count: 5.3k
summary: After slacking off junior year and struggling to juggle responsibilities, you're stuck retaking your math course in the summer. With your future on the line, you were stuck with San to work together with you so you both can pass this summer course as seniors. You two seem to have a hard time focusing on your studies. Is it because you don't understand the work or a certain someone that's distracting you
taglist: @purplepsycho03 @melonmochimoon @neptunehobi @soleilsuhh @dundun-baby @kpopsnowball (Send me a message if you want to be added or removed from the tag list.)
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Your stepmom Maria seemed to be very disappointed in you once again for letting her down this year. She had planned so many family trips, vacations, and hangouts for the whole family to enjoy this summer, but thanks to my failing this dumb math class, I have to be stuck in this school until July.
“You better be lucky I can afford for you to retake this class. Your reckless behavior has gone on long enough.” Your mom walks beside you upstairs inside Walnut Hills Highschool making sure you don’t skip out on the first day of summer school.
“Mom, you know you don’t have to walk me to class. I know what I’m doing!” You groan at her as she links her arms with you in the hallway.
“Clearly you don’t! If you did you wouldn’t be stuck here retaking this class. Now we’re almost there so keep your head high and lose the tude.”
There it was class 2A once again. This class was an absolute nightmare. I took a deep breath and slid the door open slowly with my eyes halfway open anxious to see who was sitting in the classroom.
“Welcome back miss Y/LN! Good seeing you again.” Mr. Harris said with a smile. This sucker, you had a love-hate relationship with Mr. Harris. You loved the fact that he was super nice and helpful when he was your English tutor freshman year, but you hated how he had a crush on your mom and how weird teacher-parent conference meetings would get when they would sneak off with each other in his office.
“Good morning Mr. Harris. Good seeing you again.” Your mom blushed to try to contain her excitement, but it was too obvious. “Anyways I’ll be heading my way out. She’s all yours for the summer.” Your mom gave you one last hug and kiss on the cheek before she left.
You sighed, rolling your eyes, fanning yourself already sweating from the classroom’s lack of cold air blowing. You complained again by saying.“Mr. Harris, are we staying in this room all summer? I’m sweating like a fat pig.”
“Unfortunately, yes. The PCs in the computer lab have been shut down and the school plans on replacing them with apple PCs by august. So these are the cards we’ve been dealt with. Let’s get started shall we.”
All the students in the classroom sighed, taking sips of their water bottles as Mr. Harris took attendance.
“Let’s see...We have Angela, Oliver, Chris, Yui, Y/N...Who’s missing? Choi San?”
“Here.” San slams the door open, arriving 20 minutes late with his chocolate milk in one hand and a glazed donut in the other. “Sorry Mr. Harris, I’ve overslept.”
Mr. Harris sighs, shaking his head, chuckling to calm himself down. “As expected. Just glad that you’re here, please have a seat.”
There was only one seat left which was in the front next to you and that would of course be his assigned seat for the rest of the summer.
You never heard much of San except everyone saying that he dropped out sophomore year.
You remember having a crush on him during freshman orientation when you both were shadowed by this kid named Lee Know. The whole time you were quiet, but you remembered staring at the handsome devil strutting in his uniform the whole time.
So to see him once again took you and everyone by surprise.
“Class, make sure you remember your partner’s name sitting next to you for this summer because you will work together in order to pass this class.”
“Say what?” You look over at San, who was making origami at his desk. “Good seeing again kid.” He smirks at you leaving you speechless. “Want a donut?” He reached out, handing a piece to you.
You were slamming your head on the desk thinking to yourself. “Mom, I know I promised I would finish this class, but I don’t know if I can...”
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Mr. Harris had you paired up in groups of two to complete a series of word problems and online on this website called Pearson. On the bright side, walnut hills provided MacBooks for students that didn’t have their laptop, but of course, if they tried to watch Netflix, facetime with their friends, or search for something inappropriate, their laptop will be shut down for 24 hours until further notice.
The first two weeks were pretty quiet between you and San because both of you aren’t necessarily the best conversation starters and whenever San would ask you something it would only just help him cheat on an assignment or help him make up an excuse to skip class. Up until the third week hit you had enough of his excuses trying to avoid doing the work.
The third week you were assigned to work on three hours of pre-cal on the computer and you had the option to locate to a different classroom of course if you couldn’t focus in a cramped room full of sweaty students. So you and san decided to work in the math lab across from class 2A and try to work out a plan.
“Listen San I know this class is our worst enemy, but I promised my mom I would graduate next year and If I have to restart my junior year again I would die of embarrassment. So please try a little harder.” San sighs nodding to your proposal looking deeply into your eyes.
“Fine. I guess I’m in the same boat. I figured retaking junior year would make my mom mad too.” He reaches his hand shaking it with yours smiling.
Your heart starts pounding pretty fast as you're exchanging the agreement with San and you gaze your eyes back at the computer again clearing your throat.
“So, all we have to do is remember the methods Mr. Harris taught us and we'll be alright. What section are we on?” San scrolls through his laptop trying to login into his Pearson account. “I believe it's section 3.A. 20 questions which are due this Friday?! Man, Mr. Harris won’t give us a break.”
You giggled at his surprised reaction. Sometimes he can be soft which makes you melt inside even more. It made you wonder why he was always hanging around with the rebels with no future at school. Maybe life at home was rough and he didn’t have a lot of friends. All these questions were running through your head, which made you not realize that San suddenly moved closer to you.
“You need help with that problem? You were staring blankly at the screen for the past 10 minutes. Here let me show you how to do this.” San wraps his arm around you, pulling you closer to writing the answer problem step by step to help you understand it better, but that wasn’t exactly helping.
All you were doing was admiring his beautiful face to face. It made you remember the first time you saw him with his glowing melon skin, sharp jawline, the way he can pull off a white collar and a striped tie it just seemed impossible.
On top of that his knowledge in math made him 10x more attractive, but you couldn’t understand why someone as brilliant and essential as him set himself up in the wrong crowd and stuck in this situation that cost him his high school diploma.
“So that’s how you get y= 18 + 15x. Any questions?” “Yeah, why the hell are you so fine. Forget Mr. Harris, you can be my tutor.” Would’ve sounded better in your head, but you accidentally said it out loud.
San looked at you with his eyes flashing open and then he burst out laughing. “Well Ms. Y/LN if I knew you were having this much fun, I would’ve signed up for this a long time ago.”
“Same here. You know I didn’t think math was your thing. How come you're so good at it?” He sighs, leaning looking up at the ceiling as his mood changes very quickly. “My dad is an entrepreneur and a CEO of his own company.
He’s very good at math so he taught me at an early age so someday I can take over his company someday. He’s never home at times either so I’m pretty much always helping my friends with their math homework as a side hustle.”
“That must be tiring. I know that must be a lot of pressure for a 17-year-old.” San nods his head in agreement and says “It is, but hey that’s what I’ve been dealing with all my life. We got to finish these questions so we can go home early.” With the both of you panicking you turn back to your computers finishing the last set of problems.
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You were having so much fun at school with San that you forgot you had to make it to dinner on time with your wicked stepmother. Ever since you’ve started your sophomore year at Walnut Hills your father was keeping his dating life a secret until he unexpectedly announced that he wanted to marry Maria. Your dad was always the playboy so it always would irritate you whenever he brings another woman into the picture.
Your father planned on marrying Maria by the time you’ve graduated high school, but that all ended in tragedy when your father one day died in a car accident on the way to your volleyball game. This is why you quitted sports, fell out with your best friends, and flunked almost all your classes. Maria has always shown tough love even when your dad was around, but that’s because she never knew what it was like to raise children and she wanted to learn to become closer to your family, but your relationship with her was always rocky.
Arriving late at night you’ve run to your house sweating and panting to your angry stepmom in the kitchen tapping her foot.
“Y/N, do you know what time it is? School ended at 5. Why are you late for dinner? This better is good missy.” You caught your last breath and then rolled your eyes at Maria’s snarky comment. “Me and my partner in my class took longer than expected to finish our assignment. Sorry, okay?”
You’ve slammed your backpack on the back of your chair and grabbed a plate of yong chow rice to eat with your family. “Don’t you roll your eyes at me? I just asked a simple question. Don’t tell me your working with that Choi San guy?”
You shook your head as you started to feel yourself explode at the dinner table, but you let her finish. “I know that because Mr. Harris told me. Look all I’m saying is you better stay concentrated on getting out of summer school and don’t fool around with these boys. Got it?”
You’ve finally snapped and stood up slamming the table with your fists. “You know what, I don’t understand why you're nagging me about every little thing going on in my life. You can’t just be proud that I finished my assignments for this week. But, no you keep finding ways to complain to me about me not working hard enough or messing around. I’m getting really tired of it. That’s why I hate it here!”
“Y/N! Don’t walk away from me when I’m talking to you.” She followed you all the way upstairs until you closed the door and locked it in her face. You were too tired and frustrated to be dealing with her constant ranting so you’ve just sat in your room, put your AirPods on, and blocked her yelling from the background. “We’ll talk about this another day. Psh teenagers.”
For the rest of the night, you smush your face in your pillow crying yourself to sleep. You look back on the polaroids of your dad around your room and through your phone missing his presence in your home. “Dad, why did you leave me alone with her? If it was just the three of us, things would be so different. I miss you.”
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Your partnership with San seemed to improve drastically which was surprising, to say the least. All the other kids in the class however didn’t seem to improve. Some were either cheating or missing the deadlines. Mr. Harris was not pleased by the results so he found other alternatives.
“You know what class, here’s what we’re about to do. To make this a lot more fun, how about we do class activities for extra credit. Since some of you are glued to your devices nowadays we can play games like Kahoot, Jenga, and Tetris to answer questions. I can even narrow down the questions on the assignments. How does that sound?” Everyone in class chants and cheers loving the idea which keeps them even more motivated to continue working.
“Alright everyone the games won’t start today, but next week. This is the last week of June and summer school so that means we’re halfway there from finishing. You cannot screw this up. Try acing this week’s quiz with 90% everyone or no games for those with below 70%. Got it?” “Yes, Mr. Harris!” You’ve become closer to the class since it was only nine of you, but your best friends are Angela, San, and Chris. The four of you stopped for ice cream after school to study for this week’s big math test that covered five sections.
“Gosh, Mr. Harris put 40 questions on the test! What the hell is he on crack?”
Everyone laughed at Chris complaining. He would always try to find shortcuts just so he can finish playing PubG, but he always ends up getting in trouble because he procrastinates too much. The only reason he’s somewhat doing well is because of his girlfriend Angela.
She was always a straight-A student and a bit of a geek at school, but outside of school, she was a baddie. She ended up having to retake pre-cal because she wanted to offer to help Chris with homework but ended up failing with him. “Oh hush it’s not even that bad. If you would’ve done those practice problems like you were told, you wouldn’t be complaining so much.” She slaps the back of Chris' head making him spat out his dip cone.
San looks at them admiring their silly dysfunctional relationship and then looks at you mesmerized. He leans in whispering in your ear saying “Why can’t we be more like them. They’re cute together.” You turned to him, slapping his shoulder softly giggling. “We shouldn’t. We agreed to only focus on school, remember?” He looks at you pouting “Does it have to be strictly about work? Like Mr. Harris said, we can have fun with it. We are partners after all.”
You look to the side trying to avoid his gaze as you take another spoonful of mint cocoa. With your sloppy spoonful of ice cream leftover on your face, San quickly grabbed a napkin from the table and whipped your face. “Be careful, you had a little mint chocolate on your face.” He kissed the side of your lips and smirked at you right afterward leaving everyone shocked.
“You guys are hot together.”
Chris with no filter shouted out leaving you a blushing mess. You quickly grabbed your ice cream and backpack as you heard your stepmom pulling up at the dairy parking lot. “You know what duty calls. I’ll meet you guys at the same time tomorrow at San’s place just like we planned. I gotta shave my legs. Later!” San wanted to grab your arm real quick to give you a proper goodbye, but you already beat him to it by sprinting to the car.
“Honey, why did you run in the car so fast? You would have finished your ice cream-”
“No time for that, just drive Mom.” Maria laughs looking at you covering your face with your cardigan and looking at San’s pouting face playing with his spoon he just ate from his ice cream. “Reminds me of the good old days when I was in high school.” Your stepmom cranked the engine and drove all the way home.
When you arrived home you flopped your body on your bed trying to focus on finishing studying for your test by yourself, but all your thinking about San’s kiss replaying in your head over and over again. “Ugh that San man, why did his lips have to be so soft? I'm supposed to be finding the formula for x, not the formula to get into San’s heart.” You’ve pulled out your laptop attempting to send an email to Mr. Harris said that you wanted to switch partners, but you prevent yourself from pressing send through your mouse.
“There’s no point. We only have four more weeks plus he would be upset if I do that. I just need to calm down.” You’ve closed out of your email tab and finished your homework sinking in your thoughts.
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“Dad, hey it’s me again, I just wanted to leave a voicemail letting you know that later on today I’ll be bringing my friends over to work on studying for our big test. It would be nice for you to meet them, but of course, I know work is more important. Anyways please come visit again sometime soon. Love you, peace.” San sighs, hanging up the phone as he sets the table up getting ready for you, Angela, and Chris to come over. San has always learned to live basically on his own growing up.
His father is always running off on business trips, his mother left him at a young age to marry a wealthy man and his older brother was already out of the country to join the Navy. His brother was the only person he can count on for family events when it came to birthdays, Christmas, and even father’s day. At least his brother could attend and catch up with his crazy high school life.
Snapping out of his train of thoughts he opens the door as soon as he hears the doorbell ring. “Coming!” He fixed his Pikachu long sleeve and parted his hair before he opened the door. He was smiling so wide after seeing it was you, Angela and Chris.
“C'mon in you guys. Welcome to mi palacio. Let’s study in the living room.”
Everyone ran to the living room pleased with the smell of pina colada candles filling the house. You were shocked that San got to live in this huge nicely decorated home yet you seem to notice that his family is not present.
You see picture frames of him when he was younger in a monster inc sitting on the fountain at Disneyland.
There was also another cute family photo of San’s best friend named Wooyoung that he met since kindergarten, but sadly they ended up cutting ties since they went to different schools.
A picture that stood out from all of them was one of him sitting on his mom’s lap when he was five smiling super hard with his pretty white smile. You’ve never seen him smile that hard and you were always curious more about his past so the family photos have shown a nice glimpse into his past “Hey y/n cmon I made some ramen. We have to pull out the flashcards so we can study.” “W-wait, but your baby pictures I want!” “No time we can look at them later.”
He winks and gently holds your hand and walks downstairs with you.
“Here goes the love birds. We have to try San’s famous spicy ramen dish before it gets too cold.” Everyone sits down at the dinner table clasping their hands together ready to dig in until the door opens.
“Surprise brother! Sorry I’m late. Did I miss dinner?” San’s brother Jinhyuk walks in with veggie wraps and steak bulgogi in his hand. San runs up to his brother hugging him super tight happier to see that he finally made it home. “Guys this is my brother Jinhyuk. Jinhyuk this is Chris, Angela, and Y/N.”
Jinhyuk smiles at everyone greeting everyone. “So what’s been going on with you guys? I know you have been stuck in school together, but what have you guys been doing outside of school?” Angela started by saying “Well so far me and Chris have been seeing each other every day. We always go to the park or the carnival when we get the chance for dates. We have also been hanging out with these two right here.”
Chris joined in saying “Exactly right. You can say we’re like the Scooby-Doo gang of course without scooby.” San laughs adding on “No way you’re definitely Scooby. Angela is Velma, I’m Freddy, and Y/N is Daphne.” Everyone at the table laughed as they enjoyed San’s ramen catching up with each other.
Jinhyuk elbows you as he chats with you in the kitchen. “Hey, I noticed that you were sitting there staring at my brother. What’s going on with you two.” Your eyes flashed wide open as you were surprised by Jinhyk’s sudden question. You faced him scratching the back of your head not knowing how to answer his question. “Well, I honestly don’t know. I think he just likes teasing me. One minute he flirts with me, the next minute he treats me like one of the guys. My mom also doesn’t want me getting distracted so I’m trying to keep my distance.”
Jinhyuk laughs and then pets your head. “Well, you both already failed at keeping your distance. I think he likes you, but since you keep running away or avoiding him too much, he feels like he’s making you uncomfortable and that you strictly want to stay as friends. I wouldn’t give him the wrong idea to be upfront about how you feel about him. You got this kid.” He grabs your empty bowl for you and washes the dishes giving you that boost of confidence. “You know what you're right. Mama didn’t raise no punk. I’ll tell him after we finish studying. Thanks, Jinhyuk I owe you the next time you visit.” You give him a thumbs up and skip happily out the kitchen looking forward to seeing your friends.
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After hours of studying flashcards, everyone finally studied feeling confident in themselves about the final test of the semester. Everyone packed their things and was ready to head home since their parents were outside. You were the only one that still felt confident about your process throughout the class so you’ve decided to stay an extra hour to study with San.
“Are you sure this is right?” You put the pencil down crossing your fingers as San checks your work. “Wow yes, that is correct. See you’re doing just fine. You only got 7 wrong out of the 40 questions. Just keep using that method I taught you and you’ll be just fine.” San smiles at you pinching your cheeks. “It’s 10:30 pm. Your mom is going to be worried about you. You should start heading home. I'll drop you off.” San started putting his notebook and laptop back on his desk getting ready to leave his room, but you pull on his sleeve bringing him back down on the couch with you.
“Wait, um why don’t we watch a movie or something. My mom is out with Mr. Harris anyways they won’t be back until the morning. I kind of told her I was spending the night at my cousin’s house.”
San smiles, shaking his head gulping, sitting back down next to you. “That sounds nice and all, but I don’t want to get you in trouble. Plus you do realize you’re staying over at a boy’s house at night.” You lean your head on his shoulder holding his hand yawning. “I know I trust you. You wouldn’t do anything unless I told you I wanted to. Just for tonight please San?” San sighs, lifting your chin patting the back of your head. “Fine, but next time let me meet your mom. I want to know everything there is about you okay?” You nod linking pinkies with him. “Deal. Now let’s watch Money Heist Shall we?”
The next morning you wake up in San’s arms as you share a blanket on the living room couch. You woke up fixing his messy black hair struck by his sleeping face. “Gosh you're even more dreamy when you're sleeping.” You checked the time on your phone and realized what time it was.
Pre-cal normally starts around 10, it was 11:20. “San gets up, we're late for class! We can’t miss this one Mr. Harris is giving us get extra credit today.” San woke right up alert as he wiped the drool from the side of his mouth.
“Dang, we gotta go. Here brush your teeth real fast, brush your hair and let’s roll.”
The two of you got ready as fast you could and hopped right on his motorcycle speeding through the traffic throughout the city.
You wrapped your arms around San the whole time scared you’ll fall on the motorcycle. San felt so happy whenever you depended on him for anything. “God I love this girl. I know they say I’m too young or going too fast, but I can’t help it.” He mumbled under his breath as he arrived at the school.
“Well well if it isn’t San and Y/N. You better be lucky you didn’t miss the test. We just got done playing Kahoot.” The two of you poured with your heads looking down feeling ashamed as you walked to your seats. The two of you took one last glimpse of each before Mr. Harris handed out the test.
This was it after everything you’ve been through this past month with San and your friends. The hard work was going to determine if you actually made it through or not. Mr. Harris gave you a whisper of encouragement you never heard in a long time except for your dad. “Y/N no matter what happens I’ll always be proud of you. Finish this strong.”
Mr. Harris' words almost moved you to tears as you smiled and nodded your head right back at him. Now you understand why Maria loved him so much he was always passionate about teaching and cared about your well-being.
You grabbed your pencil and your laptop as you started getting to work. The whole time you were nervous and a few questions caused you to slip up, but in the end, you remembered how to do most of the work. San seemed to be holding up just fine so you weren’t too worried about him, Angela would always double-check her work before turning it in and Chris was surprisingly focused the whole time.
As everyone finished their tests Mr. Harris checked everyone’s grades one by one slowly seeing their process.
He stands up taking off his glasses and says. “Class...congratulations on becoming seniors! Everyone has passed summer school. See you in the fall.”
Everyone screamed cheering as the paper was flying and everyone in the classroom cheered. “Yeah, you guys hang out at the carnival!” Chris screamed and everyone followed him out.
Before catching up with everyone you called your stepmom to tell her the good news with Mr. Harris next to you.
“Mom, I finally passed. Dad’s face right now you know he’s probably crying. It was all thanks to Mr. Harris too, he's the best teacher ever.”
You can hear your mom’s voice on the other end as she gets teary-eyed. “Your dad would definitely be so happy that you passed, but also pissed because he never wants you in summer school ever again.” The three of you laugh together as you share the happy news.
“I’m so sorry I doubted you and was super harsh y/n. I love you and just want you to succeed. Your my only banana muffin I got in this world so don’t pull off any dumb crap like this ever again.”
“Yes mom, you know I will. I made a promise to dad after all. I will graduate and stay close to you if it’s the last thing I do. Love you, I'm going to the carnival with my friends.”
Maria makes kissy noises back and says “I love you too. Don’t stay out too late. Matter of fact I’ll meet you there since me and Harris have a date anyways. See you there.” You hang up feeling emotional as you hug Mr. Harris.
Mr. Harris pats you on the back saying “Didn’t I tell you she’s very proud. Now I think you need to catch up with your friends before he leaves without you. I’ll meet you at the carnival.” Mr. Harris leaves the classroom giving you one last smile and heading out.
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You walked in the hallway looking all around the school for San, luckily you found him in the science lab where he’s sitting by the window with a sad look on his face.
“San. We’ve gotta meet up with everyone at the carnival. Why are you here by yourself?”
San sighs, crossing his arms.
“There’s no point in celebrating. I tried reaching out to both of my parents to tell them about one of the biggest accomplishments in my life and as usual, they didn’t answer.” You sat right next to him at the window petting his head. “You know what, how dare they? Forget them.
You have a supportive big brother, an amazing group of friends, and the best teacher a school could ever ask for. You have a family right here and we’re proud of you.”
San lifts his head up as he sees your bright smile that always makes him helpless.
“You always know exactly what to say. What would I do without you?”
He links pinkies with you. “I really can’t wait for you to meet my stepmom. She gets on my nerves sometimes and we always tend to bump heads, but we always come right back together. Dad would’ve also loved you. He was always straight to the point and never held back. I loved that confidence he always had.”
“Oh yeah he did get into that accident last year, I’m so sorry about that.”
You shake your head “It’s alright, I’m still holding up just fine. I’m just happy to have you here with me plus I get to be seniors with you and everyone else.” San looks up at you one last time slowly leaning his face close to yours until your noses touch.
“Gosh, I wonder what would happen if I made out with Y/N in the science lab? The janitor would for sure catch us in the act.” You giggle flirting with him back.
“The only thing he would have to worry about cleaning up is the kiss marks that are going to be on your neck.”
“Wow, I didn’t know you were this playful. I love seeing this side of you.”
The two of you finally exchange a short yet sweet kiss in the orange sunset peeking against the window. It was going to last longer until Angela and Chris crashed the party with a loud knock on the door.
“Hurry up Freddy and Daphne the Scooby gang has to pull up at the carnival together. You guys can finish eating each other's faces off in the car. We can’t miss the flight of fear!”
The two of you looked at each other shrugging and walked together hand in hand out the classroom. “Well, I guess we will have to finish this on the carousel.” “Indeed, that sounds more romantic than making out while being surrounded by jars of disinfected frogs in the science lab.”
The two of you catch up with the rest of the seniors of class 2021 as you look forward to your last summer as juniors together. Today was going to be the day where you go all out and live like you're gonna die young.
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theyarebothgunshot · 3 years
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jib 7 breakdown and analysis 
a little while ago i said that i am open to requests for making analysis posts when it comes to cockles panels and just cockles in general, and i got quite a few responses. the first person who asked me was my lovely tea anon, and the panel in question is jib 2016 aka jib 7. 
first of all i want to give you my take on the overall vibe, and then second of all i will get into the details and link to certain timestamps in the video. 
standard disclaimer: i am not gonna be linking to every single thing i talk about, but i will try my best to link to the moments that stand out to me the most. my recommendation would be to watch the panel in its entirety alongside my comments. i have read long posts about this panel before, so not everything in this post is gonna be original or said for the first time ever, simply because there is a good chance that information has stuck in my mind and has subconsciously formed my view of this panel. this is also in no way, shape or form gonna be coherent, unfortunately. i’m just gonna hope that the cockles hivemind will be able to make sense of this regardless. love and light. and lastly, this is all in good fun, so don’t come at me if you think this is too out there please and thank you.
the overall vibe that this panel gives me is that jensen and misha are a unity at this point. they are in sync with each other, and this whole panel is very relaxed and in good spirits. there is also the fact that their outfits match very well. and with jensen ross ackles involved, that cannot be a coincidence, so i love that a lot. 
another thing that i cannot ignore is that it’s also a very sexual panel, with a lot of double meanings and innuendos and remarks that can be read as sexual if you are as pervy as me. 
now let’s get into the specifics. 
although i am sure this is not going to be news for any of you, i feel like a little background knowledge is in order. before this panel, misha had had a panel that day with j*red. the mishalecki panel was really fucking funny and filled with sexual innuendos. 
between these two panels, it appears that there was a break in which they all had nothing to do (i am basing this off other people’s experiences and reports that i have read in the past, as i unfortunately wasn’t there myself).
considering how this panel goes, i think there is a good chance that jensen and misha just had sex beforehand. and based on both of their demeanors, one could draw certain conclusions about who did what (i honestly don’t like talking about who tops and who bottoms because who gives a shit and things are rarely that black and white, but all i’m gonna say is that even though jensen has joked about his asshole before, jensen and misha clearly said switch rights).
from the very first second. the VERY FIRST SECOND. jensen is sauntering on stage like he is thee man. then the crowd is cheering ‘one more time’, and jensen looks at misha, starts cheering too, and makes a movement that is bordering on obscene before waving it away. conclusion: ‘one more time’ could also mean ‘one more round of hot steaming sex’ and he still had sex on the brains, so that was what he was thinking about. 
ahhh, the intricate ritual [1m34s] of greeting each other on stage as if you haven’t spoken to each other all day, even though you probably just had sex….. jensen ackles, i wanna study you. i wonder what the deal is with that. does he just like to pay misha extra attention on stage? does he revel in the fact that he knows that fans like this sort of interaction? can he just not help himself? questions that keep me up at night. 
also, there is just SOMETHING about the way jensen says ‘i’m doing well how are you?’ it’s almost flustered? borderline shy? and then he goes on to say that he did an impression of misha earlier, in a manner that’s just so flirty. idk guys. it’s flirty. kindergarten flirty, but flirty nonetheless.
misha, of course, immediately turns his entire body towards him. almost as if they both already forgot there is an audience in front of them. then he just gets closer and closer to jensen, for no reason whatsoever except for the pure magnetic pull they have on each other. pray4misha.
i think it is a testament to how in sync they are that misha immediately realises that jensen mentioned bicycle touring during his ‘impression of misha’, and i love the moment where jensen puts on an accent (something that misha normally does) and goes ‘is like sport’ and misha laughs and goes ‘is very similar to sport’ and they both lose it. idk, i feel like that might be a sort of inside joke to them as well. 
this might be slightly reaching, but hear me out: right away, jensen goes: ‘oh by the way, sore?’ why would he say ‘by the way’? what is he thinking about when he says that? is it about ‘is very similar to sport’? because i could totally see them having sex and refering to it as ‘well that’s kind of like a sport’, as an inside joke. it works. i’m just saying!!! 
look. i know this back and forth has been discussed to death. we all know that the implication is that jensen fucked misha and misha is kind of stunned that jensen actually goes there. so stunned that he repeats it: ‘sore? am i sore?’ almost as if to stall a bit in his response. yikes. 
i think that it’s fair to say that this is something jensen enjoys doing: riling misha up on stage. because a lot of the time, misha has the upper hand on stage (probably also in the bedroom but that’s another conversation), but sometimes. sometimes jensen just can’t help but throw a lil oil onto the fire. (see also: underbear panel, throwing himself on stage to get straddled, etc). 
misha goes on to say that ‘after the panel with j*red’ he is quite sore. you can take that at face value, and think ‘oh so he is joking around that the panel with j*red made him sore haha’ or you can see a little bit of the truth shine through: literally after that panel, something happened that made him sore. it’s always easier to lie when you are bending the truth.
i actually can’t believe i never connected the dots before, but when misha deflects and says ‘oh you’re talking about the bike riding’ jensen is quick to say: ‘oh no i was talking about what just happened’ but instead of pointing at the stage (which is where the previous panel took place) he is gesturing to backstage. i mean…. way to feed into my ‘they just had sex backstage’ theory, jackles. thanks for that. 
i cannot get over the way jensen is looking at misha throughout this whole ordeal, but especially when he goes ‘you heard it here first, folks’ and misha walks up to him. THAT FACE. fuck him. he’s so gone. 
sidenote: i have never wished to be able to read lips as much as i have since i have stumbled upon these two morons, because i WISH i could see what misha is mouthing to jensen. i know there is some spec that he might have said ‘i am a little bit’ (aka he is a little bit sore) and i could see that, but i just want to know for sure. and even though i have seen people state that jensen would have already known about the panel with j*red, i think it’s possible misha hadn’t filled jensen in yet, seeing as they probably were doing something other than talking. 
let me take this moment to tell y’all about one of my jenmish theories, and that is: i think that jensen sometimes is overprotective of misha and that can come across as jealousy when it’s actually just worry. and i think this panel is a good example of that.
misha says [4m25s] that in italy they call come influence and jensen just. straight up looks at misha like ‘what the fuck did you do, what mess did you get yourself into this time?’ this is another reason why i believe he actually didn’t know about what happened during that panel yet: the reaction looks very authentic. you see his eyes shift from one side to the other and back again, as he is trying to process it. and honestly when you look at misha, his face goes through this journey of ‘this is funny’ to ‘shit is this maybe going a bit too far?’ and ending on ‘okay wrap it up wrap it up’. this is further solidified by the fact that jensen starts to mime digging a grave (aka ‘digging your own grave’).
misha tries to ‘change the subject’ by saying cas is the bottom in the implied relationship with sam and jensen immediately brings it back to sports. see what i meant when i said that they are tying sex and sports together? here jackles goes again, doing exactly that. for no reason whatsoever. (except to once again proof my point). 
WHY [5m50s] do they both burst out laughing at ‘tight end’ why why why i don’t wanna know but why why also quick reminder of ‘are you sore at all’ help i am just. EVERY DAY they are making me perceive things and connect dots and i do not like it. anyways i’m not saying that this is all very graphic stuff about their sex lives but i’m also not not saying it, you feel? jensen’s face says it all tbh. on a more wholesome note: i love the fact that they basically wanted to say ‘we should take questions’ at the same time. again: in sync. 
when the first person to ask a question said ‘this is a serious question’ misha goes to explain to jensen that that was a joke during his panel with j*red, another reason to believe that he hadn’t told jensen about the panel yet. jensen’s face there…. heart eyes motherfucker. 
i really don’t see enough people talk about the ‘safe word’ [6m38s] bit. jensen is the one to bring it up ‘so we should probably establish a safe word at this point. mine is keep going.’ misha laughs, and then realises what jensen has said, and (here comes my dom/sub truthing) teases jensen by saying ‘what is your safe word?’ to which jensen replies ‘keep going’ but LOOK at jensen’s face after he says that. he shakes his head with a little smirk and looks at misha with such a knowing look in his eyes that says ‘you fucker you know damn well what my safe word is’ and he actually does a double take and immediately rolls his eyes at himself after that. it’s all very quick but it’s far from subtle and i am here for it. 
i fucking love this next part because when the person says ‘a real story about the real jensen and the real misha’ they both are just like ‘yes okay’ but as soon as they say ‘that you have never told anyone before’ jensen just looks down and moves his head as if to say ‘what the hell am i supposed to come up with then’ lmao it’s really funny, and they end it with: ‘to know you a little bit better’ and guys (gn) i beg of you to look at the way they look at each other here. [7m24s] jensen is just like ‘help wtf should we say to this’ and misha just smiles down at him fondly like ‘sigh our fans really want us to talk about our relationship and as much as we would love to share stuff we just can’t’.
when misha says ‘we have to dust off some of those stories that we usually try not to tell other people’, something comes to mind: the ‘3 least ordered items on the menu’ story, that jensen shared a year after this at honcon. i honestly think that maybe they started to talk about what else they could share with the public, after this panel, because they get similar questions like this one all the time. either that or jensen just thought about what he felt comfortable sharing, without talking to misha about it, and decided to tell that story. 
i also absolutely love when they say ‘this is a serious question’ at the same time. AGAIN: IN SYNC!!!
‘i actually have a voice for you’ jensen can you please tell me why this sounds flirty and charming while you are actually about to make fun of your husband? i hate you (no i don’t) the fact that misha immediately knows what will happen, says a lot.
then jensen says: ‘dust off an old story for uhh..’ and burst out laughing. i swear to god i’d give my left pinkie to know what came to mind and what he whispered into misha’s ear. and i’m left handed. but i think we can all agree that whatever jensen said, it was something sexual, seeing as misha goes ‘nope’. those fuckers (affectionate).
something that i have mentioned in the past is that jensen always sort of ‘jokey’ goes ‘oh shit’ whenever misha says he’ll share something personal/private about them. i mean. jensen, it would be less sus if you didn’t respond. just giving you some pointers here, bro. because misha almost never shares something strange, it’s actually your reaction that makes me go ‘hmmmm.’ this time he even gets kind of elaborate breathing?? [10m27s]
oh to be a fly in clif’s car… honestly, the things clif must have heard and witnessed lmao. he clearly knows what is up between them (has made enough remarks about thinking that misha would be the bottom and that misha on his knees was nothing new for me to see that he absolutely knows.) 
this isn’t really important when it comes to cockles but they talk a bit about j*red’s internet dispute with at&t and jensen goes ‘oh they know’ gesturing to the audience. so clearly, jensen is well aware of the fact that fandom gets involved whenever something happens online with any one of them. just. thought that is an interesting fact. just in general. also love how i can tell that they both think j*reds crusades are bullshit (as they should). 
there is something really cute [14m13s] about the way misha goes ‘do you want your apple juice?’ and jensen goes ‘yeah!’ it sounds so domestic and mundane and i just. god i love them so much. 
i know we talk about jensen’s heart eyes a lot. but y’all. look [14m52s] at misha right here. he’s SO in love.
the thing that strikes me about jensen putting on ‘that voice’ for misha is that misha is honestly not bothered by it at all, but i think if the shoe was on the other foot, jensen would definitely be bothered. i don’t know what conclusion to draw from that but i just thought that is interesting. i always laugh at that bit, though, they seem to have so much fun.
i REALLY wanna know how jensen got from ‘will you dance for us?’ to ‘no but i’ll tell you what, misha and i will write a song for you real quickly.’ it’s such a fast transition that i am tempted to think that this was something he had been thinking about for a while now. he just wanted his mish to sing a song. and that warms my heart.
if you think i will ever get over how soft jensen is here… ‘you’re smart, you think on your feet, you make brilliant videos, put them on facebook, write amazing texts (*coughs* poems) and tweets and stuff, go ahead. spit out some lyrics, big guy.’ there is not one single thing about this that i do not adore. an ode to misha!!!! so casually!!! fuck. it might be true that if you want jensen to do something, you get misha to ask him, but it’s certainly also true the other way around.
the way jensen just. stares [19m02s] at misha, trying to get inspired by him, trying to feel out what cords to play. yeah. the way misha stands up but instinctively turns to jensen when he starts to sing. yeah. and then during the remainder of the song, he keeps on turning to jensen even though he faces the audience. and jensen loved it all. it’s so sweet. idk why but it just is. jensen just wanted his babe to thrive and get the love he deserves. 
aaaand in comes the dom shake [20m37s]. we love to see it. jensen just keeps on looking at mish. almost gets lost in it. touches his inner thigh (one of his habits, which he does a lot around misha or when talking about misha). 
i think it’s very interesting that jensen’s reaction [22m11s] to the question if he thinks dean will ever find a way to have a romantic relationship and to find himself in between normal and supernatural, is to immediately looks at misha. like? what was the reason? did he expect misha to answer a question that wasn’t about cas but about dean? did he think he should maybe answer it in a destiel-like manner? was he worried that the fan was hoping for a destiel-like answer and was he looking at misha to gauge what he thought was a smart way to respond? so many questions. 
i think it’s pretty interesting that jensen was very aware of the fact that people did not wanna see dean end up with a huntress lmao. he absolutely was aware of so many fandom things.
when jensen said that misha just crossed the line [23m40s], it’s another example of how jensen is ultra aware of what misha says and how it could get him into trouble and by the sounds of it, misha knows that as well but he just can’t always stop himself in time. from what we can see, he often realises just after he has already said something (when it is already too late).
listen. the fact that misha says ‘when harry met sally’ BEFORE the question was even finished, and jensen LAUGHS, like??? that panel was 5 years ago at that point. it clearly made a lot of impact on the both of them (jeez i wonder why, could it be because misha faked an orgasm and jensen got excited? hmm. who knows.) 
i think the dance portion is so fucking hilarious i’m wheeeezing. literally. they are just moving randomly AND YET THEY STILL SORT OF ARE IN SYNC? amazing.
you wanna know what i find really cute? the fact that jensen has such a soft spot for the resume off. part of me thinks it’s because they had a resume off in both 2012 and 2013. 
and jib 2012 took place during the famously rumored break up period. i wouldn’t be surprised if jib 2013 was that much more special to him because they finally got to make it right again. don’t look at me i’m getting emotional (on that note…… i might wanna write something about the break up period at some point. but idk. i mean. it’s a lot to delve into especially since i wasn’t in the fandom back then but. it compels me. we’ll see i guess.)
okay i know i keep saying this but they are SO in sync, as soon as they talk about photo ops and jensen goes ‘and to dab a little salt in the wound’ misha knows what he is gonna say, and they stand up together to demonstrate what happened. AND they both go ‘that’s not the punchline’ they are husbands. 
misha and jensen have both “twirled away laughing” in the EXACT same manner during this panel: misha when jensen starts to read the script, and jensen right here when misha says ‘what’s it like to be in a successful long running show’. they are mirrors. listen. listen. i know my mind is in the gutter a LOT of the time but like. uhm. there is this moment where they recall a woman saying in the photo op to ‘eat it’ (the string candy she gave to them) and misha says ‘and so we did’ and jensen looks at misha and it is SUCH an incriminating look i mean i don’t wanna be that person but 5 bucks he was thinking about eating misha out i am JUST SAYING. LITERALLY LOOK AT HIS FACE. [28m55s]
misha teases [7m02s] jensen by saying ‘what did you do? did you actually do it on purpose orrrr’ and i think it was to make jensen elaborate on it. which i think is a fucking good way to pull that off when it comes to jensen. cause jensen doesn’t like to brag, which misha knows, so by making that joke he is essentially trying to get jackles to tell the audience more about what he did, without him feeling like he is boasting about himself. and misha looks so pleased when jensen starts talking.
fuck i literally had to pause just now because. jensen says: ‘one of the characteristics of dean that i love to play is that he can bottle those fears up, stash them away, and just go. and uhm… sometimes i wish i could do that.’
this is actually making me a bit emotional because. he took his time saying this. it was a very deliberate move. he wasn’t sorry he said anything or regretted it. he wanted to get that out there. and i just. it makes so much sense if what we all think is actually true. he wishes he could just ignore all his fears and go for it. and it’s not hard to imagine what ‘it’ could be: coming out. whether that be just about his relationship with misha or being attracted to more than women in general, just in any way shape or form. it’s poignant. and misha turns away, but you can see him sigh a little bit. 
the whole bit about “apple juice” is just very cute and i enjoy it a lot. one thing i will say though is that i can kind of spot two tells of jensen: the way his face scrunches up when he is telling a lie that he thinks is clever, and the way he always leaves his chair to pour a drink when a question becomes difficult/hard/too funny to face head on. he has done both of those things time and time again, during panels with misha. just an observation. 
there is this little moment [10m13s] where misha tells the story about how he used to make apple cider with worms and dirt in it and in the end he goes ‘anyways. new england apple cider everyone. highly recommend.’ and jensen echoes that, ‘highly recommend. yeah.’ and of course that could just be a way to joke around and play along with misha but i’d like to think that he has visited misha and they had some apple cider together. just because i like the thought and i can, so. 
how CUTE is it that jensen remembers ‘i’ll just wait here then’, a line cas spoke 7 years prior to that panel, in a scene jensen wasn’t even in. i love it.
jensen slowly shaking his head when misha says ‘fuck’ and apologizing for it has SUCH major ‘excuse my husband’ energy. i love it.
‘i’ve got an idea’ [14m13s] ‘what? let’s do it’ misha imMEDIATELY regretted that lmaooo they are always so aware of double meanings and yet they cannot seem to help themselves. we love to see it. 
can you BELIEVE jensen ‘dance monkey dance’ ackles OFFERED to shamelessly promote a movie they have nothing to do with??? jensen, who hates the fact that they have to play some sort of show on stage, actually wanted to do that with misha??? i’m just- something something if you want jensen to do anything ask misha, but apparently also: if you want jensen to do something get misha involved and he’ll love it. 
and then he has the audacity to say ‘over to the wheel of love.’ i mean. i can’t.
(i don’t necessarily understand what is happening btw but that’s okay, because it leads to champagne. which is fun.)
okay so again apologies for my mind being in the gutter but jensen’s face [16m33s] when he says he is going to explain what [the champagne] tastes like……. hm. help. 
 honestly i just love the whole champagne bit because i love it whenever they get so playful on stage, and them “presenting” the bottle and going all ‘we know what we’re talking about’ ‘we’re kind of connaisseurs’ and the whole english accent bit. say it with me…. in sync. 
jensen popping a champagne bottle is something that can be so personal…. (i’m touch starved and going crazy, leave me alone)
i absolutely love the fact that jensen notices that misha is miming taking off his pants and misha immediately runs to him to explain and jensen just goes full on protective husband mode (YET AGAIN) ‘i turn my back for 2 minutes’ lmao it’s just such old married couple behavior. an old married couple that is horny and deranged, but still. 
i’ve seen the gifset of this moment [24m52s] many a times but i still think it’s so intimate. the way misha looks at jensen and walks backwards with him, for no fucking reason at all. sigh. misha’s hand clenches a little, and honestly i think he would have wanted to reach out to jensen in that moment. pat his arm or his back. and something happens a little while later that only proves my point even more…
that caress [60m5s] is probably one of the most intimate gestures i’ve seen between them. it’s so familiar. so natural. it says a lot.
and that’s the end of the panel. all in all i have to say that i enjoyed rewatching this panel with the analysis goggles on, because it’s really a very different experience and i picked up on a lot more than i did when i watched it just for fun. i think this is one of my favorite panels of theirs (at least until my next analysis lmao) because of the fact that they are so in sync with each other, which goes to show that their relationship was in such a good place (mind you i am only using past tense because i am describing a past panel, not because i think they’re not in a good place right now). this was a lot of fun folks, if you actually read all of this, god bles, you’re the best. see you next time!
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ct7567329 · 3 years
Text
Welcome Back: Fives x Reader
Warnings: Angst, Smut (18+ Please! I'll mark where it starts, so you can still enjoy the first half!)
Words: 2.5k
Corellia was dark as always. You hated this. As you strolled down the crowded street, you held your breath in disgust. The filth of the planet made you gag, but, you felt as if Corellia was the safest place to be. Crowded and disgusting, the opposite of what you liked. During the Clone Wars, post wars plans were frequently discussed among your men. You often found yourself thinking about the plans the men had. Rex wanted to be a farmer, Hardcase an actor for an action packed holovid, Jesse a dad, and Fives, well, Fives didn't care what he did, as long as those plans included you.
Before you could spiral too deep into those thoughts, you shook your head, attempting to clear your mind. Order 66 had ruined all of those plans for everyone, and two years later, you still couldn't fully process that.
As you continued down the street, you constantly glanced around for imperial stormtroopers. It felt as if as more time passed from the Jedi purge, your touch with the force faded. You could no longer simply "sense" people's presence without thinking too hard about it.
Roughly one hundred yards away from you was a small group of stormtroopers. Out of instinct,  you threw your hood over your head and tried to blend in as much as possible. As you got closer to the troopers, you ran your fingers along a soot covered bench and smeared it down your cheek, trying to disguise your facial features. On the rare chance any of those stormtroopers were clones, you could easily be recognized. The empire knew you were alive, and you didn't even want to think of the bounty over your head.
You wondered if any of troopers were clones. With there being only a few meters away from the soldiers, you glanced at them as any Corellian would. You felt one of the troopers eyes meet yours though his helmet momentarily. He watched you as you picked up your pace though the crowd, the slow turning motion of this head indicating this. After a minute or so of your quicken pace, you felt as if you were a good enough distance away from the solider that made eye contact with you. You paused and slid into an alley located only a few blocks from the run down apartment complex you call home. You sat on an empty crate and sighed, pulling your hood down. The last time you felt that stare was two tears ago.
Just like the last locked gaze you shared with Fives.
That last glance.
He was shooting at you. Through his helmet, you could sense his tears. Fives didn't want to hurt you, and you knew that. But, he had no other choice. You remember clenching your jaw, holding back tears. There was no escaping with him. You leapt from the building you were in and ran. You ran as far as you could. Far from Fives. Far from your life. Far from everything. Everything you knew was gone.
All you could ever wish for is that forever lasting nightmare to stop replaying in your head every time you saw a stormtrooper. But, that was a hopeless wish.
You ran your soot covered fingers through your hair and sighed. Just as you were about to stand up, the stormtrooper you locked eyes with was standing at the alley entrance, his blaster held lazily as his side. Figuring it was just a routine check, you began to reach for the identification card in your pocket. It was forged of course, but it always seemed to check out with the troopers. The trooper still hasn't spoken when you extended your arm, showing him your identification. His helmet tilted downwards as he read the name.
He chuckled, "Arilani Forrest? Creative!"
"No one has ever called me creative before," you mumbled, "but I best be on my way. I have a shift at the mining yard soon."
"Oh really?" his voice perked up, "would have never imagined you doing that." He began to walk towards you, forcing you to walk deeper into the alley.
You shrugged, "It was the best work I could get. Anything to better the empire." You HATED saying those words, "I'm honored to work for such a great-"
The trooper took off his hemet, making you stop mid-sentence. No wonder that glance felt familiar. It really was Fives.
Anger and passion fought within you as you stared blankly at him. Then fear hit. Quickly, you took a few steps back.
"Get away from me," you spit out.
Fives' smile turned to a frown, "Cyare, let me explain."
"You tried to kill me! You probably still are! And you just expect me to listen to you? To let my guard down and listen to the man who captured my heart and tear it to shreds?!"
"Don't act like that day was any harder for you as it was for me," he begged, stepping towards you, putting his blaster on the ground. "Remember Tup? I took that stupid chip out after that. That's why I cut my hair. I had to keep that a secret. For my safety, for your safety, for our safety!"
"Why should I trust you?" you murmured, trying to hold back tears.
Fives gave you a sympathetic smile, "Because you always used to tell me that I was the best shot in the 501st. You told me that there wasn't a single target I couldn't miss. If you really meant that, then why did I miss every shot I made at you. I wasn't even close. I was never shooting at you. If I didn't follow the order, I would have been killed right then and there. I knew you were capable of surviving. That's why I followed everyone else, knowing you would escape, hoping one day I could find you!" his smile grew, "it took two, long, excruciating years but you're here!"
You were quivering. As he stared at you, awaiting your response, you closed your eyes and exhaled, channeling the force. You came within arms length of him and placed your hands on the side of his head. Your heart skipped a beat at the touch. As you let the force speak to you, you soon came to realize he wasn't lying. There was no chip in his head. You let your arms fall to his neck as you pulled him close to you, your slow tears making his under armor around his neck wet.
His strong arms wrapped around your waist and pressed your body against his. The crappy armor felt uncomfortable on your cheek but you didn't mind. Fives twirled your hair around one of his fingers, the other hand stroking your back. The only reason why he "stayed loyal to the empire" was for this moment, no matter how long he had to wait for it.
Fives released your hair from his fingers and placed his hand on your chin, angling your face towards his. He took his glove off, exposing a clean hand, which he used to rub the soot off you cheek.
"Still as beautiful as ever," he murmured, studying your face as if he would never see it again.
"Fives, I-"
You were interrupted by his com link. He quickly threw his helmet and answered, explaining that he was simply doing identification checks, and he would report back soon. As soon as he ended the conversation, he took his helmet off and chucked in a nearby dumpster.
"I don't want to be a stormtrooper anymore," he sighed, his hands placed on your upper arms. "Please, get me out of here. They don't need me anymore."
You let out a small laugh, "While it will be a loss to the empire, let's get you, or, us, out of this nightmare."
The dark clouds over the Corellian sky finally began to give way, polluted rain hitting every surface. Rain on Corellia was vile, but in that moment, eyes locked with Fives, it didn't matter. He took off the rest of his armor and put it in the same dumpster as his helmet.
Digging through the trash, you found a battered cloak and threw it over him. "This will help you not stand out. I think the imperial logo on your shirt will give a little too much away. But let's get going. The rain is clearing out the streets."
He nodded in agreement and followed you to your apartment building. As you entered the elevator with him, you noticed he had a look of disgust.
"What?" you asked, raising an eyebrow.
Fives shook his head, "would have never expected someone like you to live somewhere so disgusting."
"Exactly. That's why I'm here. You don't get options when the empire is out to kill you," you explained as you unlocked the front door.
The apartment was smaller than Fives expected. He thought the 501st barracks were nicer than your apartment, which was clearly saying something.  He glanced to his right and watched you take off your robes, revealing an outfit similar to the one you wore during the Clone Wars. As much as he loved it, he hated it. He hated knowing that every other man in the GAR would stare at the way it hugged your body, making you look far better than any model on the holonet. But, he loved knowing that you were all his.
"Yes?" you laughed, catching Fives staring at you in awe.
Fives swallowed hard, nodding, "Just looking at the most beautiful thing in the galaxy."  He slowly walked towards you and pressed his lips against the side of your ear, "we have two years of catching up to do."
Smirking, you hopped up to sit on your kitchen counter, "723 standard rotations to be exact," you winked, playfully grabbing his hands.
His forehead met yours as he whispered, "I think I forgot how it feels to kiss you and cyar'ika, I've thought about it every day."
SMUT INCOMING
"Then what are you waiting for," you lustfully groaned into his ear.
That was all he needed to hear. Before you had the chance to take another breath, his lips were on yours, filling your body with a euphoria you haven't felt since the order. It felt as if no time passed at all, he still had every square inch of your mouth memorized. Fives put his hands on your ass, pushing your hips into his, you both instantly feeling the heat coming from the other.
"We need to get you off this counter," he groaned, nibbling on your lower lip. You moaned something inaudible in response as he picked you up and shoved your body onto the nearby couch. Straddling over you, he took a moment to stare at the sight. He longed for the day he could see you under him again.
As Fives grinded his hips against yours, you couldn't help but notice the growth in his blacks on the brink of busting open the cheap fabric. Your hands made their way to his waistband, which you didn't hesitate to pull down, exposing a fully erect Fives. The sight alone was enough to push you over the edge.
"Like what you see?" he smirked, taking the rest of his bottoms off and tossing them across the room. But before you could respond, he pressed a finger against your lips, "Now this isn't fair is it?" he wined, tugging at the hem of your shirt. In one swift motion, your shirt and bra was next to his discarded pants. Still straddled over you, fully exposed, he gawked at the sight in front of him. As he was in la la land, you pulled his shirt over his head, revealing the same toned body that made your knees weak when you first met him. You reached up to touch his left peck, running your fingers down his chest.
"Oh my handsome ARC," you whispered, tracing the outline of his abs. Two years later, pulling rank still sent him over the edge.
"That's it," he groaned, pressing his chest against yours and grinding hander into your hips. You were gasping his name with every push, which only made him push harder. Fives slipped his fingers into your pants and softly ran his index finger up your soaked clit. He pulled his finger out, your moan being music to his ears, and licked his finger dry. Fives knew damn well he was driving you up the wall, and had no plans on stopping.
You quivered at Fives' touch, and pulled the rest of your clothes off. Fives collapsed his body onto yours, the sensation of full skin to skin contact making his body tremor. As you both laid there motionless, taking in the moment, his throbbing cock kept poking at your entrance.
"Fives," you groaned, knowing you didn't even need to finish your sentence.
Slowly, he pushed the tip of his cock into you, listening to you moan under the pressure. As Fives pushed in further, his eyes rolled to the back of his head. He steadily thrusted in and out, giving you enough time to adjust to his size. Every next thrust came faster and harder. Your jaw was clenched as you groaned, trying to hold back the orgasm.
"I know you're close cyare," he said between thrusts, "where do you want it?"
Breathing heavily, you put your hands on Fives' lower back, preventing him to pull out for another thrust, "The damn war is over and we can finally live our dreams," you gasped for air, "it's a risk we can now take." You let go of his back and he continued to pump into you. As soon as you felt as if he was on the verge of splitting you right up the middle, you let out a loud moan as your walls clenched around his cock, which was simultaneously, filling you up. Fives laid down on top of you, still inside you, as you both rode out your orgasms.
"Fives," you panted, running your fingers through his hair. He smiled and shut his eyes, placing his head on your chest, listening to your rapid heartbeat.
"Oh maker, I love you," he wined, nuzzling his head into your neck. He slid his softening cock out of you and got up, grabbing a blanket from across the room. You stared at his naked body, shining with the sweat you two just created. It was like staring at an ancient god. He laid the blanket over you and sat down, pulling you onto his chest.
"Welcome back my love," you smiled, tracing your finger on his chest.
"Hope I wasn't gone too long," he winked, watching you fall asleep in his arms.
It took two years, but finally, the post war dreams you shared were finally coming true.
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hrina · 4 years
Text
In The Ring, Pt. IV - Uppercut
PAIRING: Harry x Reader RATING: M WORD COUNT: 10.6k REQUESTED: yes! 
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well lads................this is it 🥺🥺🥺 thank u guys so much for all the love you’ve given this series. i would’ve never expected to receive such a positive response, but u guys rly went above and beyond. i adore u all so much 
warning: parts of this fic will contain mentions of blood, violence, mild stalking, and sexual content. if any of that makes you uncomfortable, please take care of yourself and keep scrolling <3
as always, my masterlist and my inbox are both linked in my bio! i worked really hard on this last part! i wanted to make sure it was all perfect, so i hope everyone enjoys it. gentle reminder to reblog the fics you like! it’s a great way to show appreciation as well as give authors more exposure. ok that’s all hehe can’t wait to hear your thoughts! take care 💙💙💙
PART I: Jab
PART II: Cross
PART III: Hook
~*~
    March 20, 2021
Harry keeps his promise, and Artie brings your car back around to your place the next day. You sit up straight at the table when you hear the familiar honking of a horn sound from outside. Your feet suddenly seem to have a mind of their own, carrying you out of the kitchen quickly with your father’s confused inquiries ringing in your ears. You open the front door before Artie even has the chance to knock.
“Thanks, Jason,” you tell him, breathless.
He hands you your keys and accepts the quick hug that you bestow upon him. “No problem, little girl. Is everything alright?”
Harry didn’t tell him.
“Yeah,” you lie, nodding. “I just—I had a bit too much to drink last night, that’s all.” Your voice drops an octave. “Don’t tell my dad, okay?”
Artie presses two of his fingertips together and drags them over the seam of his mouth, metaphorically sealing his lips. You smile, your heartbeat returning to its regular pace beneath the confines of your ribs.
You step back, extending an arm and gesturing for him to enter.
“Are you hungry? We were in the middle of eating lunch.”
“Sure,” he says, kicking off his shoes and arranging them against the wall. “Thank you.”
He and your father talk about anything and everything during the meal—boxing, the economy, the basketball game that had aired late last night. You just sit there and eat your food, not wanting to attract any unnecessary attention.
They include you in the conversation for a bit—Artie asks how classes are going, and you tell him that you’re waiting for medical school acceptance (or rejection) letters to start rolling in. Other than that, they don’t bat an eye when you rinse your plate in the sink and politely excuse yourself from the table. You hide behind the fact that you have to work on an assignment that’s due in a week—the paper is worth a third of your grade and it’s crucial that you ace it.
But once you hobble back into your room, you’re crawling into bed and pulling the covers up over your head. You reach around blindly for your phone, snatching it up from where it’s charging on your nightstand. You unlock the device, scrolling through all of the grey messages that pop up right away—sent last night, one after the other, each of them unanswered, growing more and more desperate as the hours pass.
Can we please talk about this?
I’m sorry, please let me explain.
Are you ignoring me?
I know you’re seeing these. Please respond.
And then a final one, dejected and crestfallen, laced with palpable weakness even through the pixels of your screen.
Goodnight.
    April 6, 2021
Harry’s on a losing streak.
A five-match losing streak, to be precise.
He’s never been bested this many times in a row. Your father is baffled by it, unsure of why he’s been so distracted in the ring. It’s even more confusing, he thinks, considering the fact that he’s at the gym every single day, lifting weights, practicing his technique, throwing himself into the sport. But once the actual fights roll around, things change. You’re not there, and you’re his lucky charm, and because of that, he finds himself meeting the ground far more often than he’d like to admit.
Your father said that the end of the semester was approaching—as a consequence, you were buckling down with school. Harry supposes that the timing is right, so the pretext must be true. But his opponents don’t know that (nor would they care). Your absence doesn’t stop them from knocking him down with snarling faces and heavy fists. The crowds holler loudly, goading him to get back up, but Harry doesn’t. He refuses to give them the satisfaction of watching him get beaten to a bloody pulp.
He stopped trying to reach out to you a week after the night of the kiss. He composed several texts a day, but each message had been met with silence. He remembers staring down at his phone one time, watching as three grey dots wiggled on the screen for a minute or two before disappearing entirely.
That’s when he gave up. If you didn’t want to talk, fine.
It hurt like hell, though.
And it’s still hurting like hell, even a week and a half later.
You told your father about James. He had mentioned it in passing to Harry, having to end practice earlier than usual because he had to set a court date to deal with some bastard who wouldn’t leave you alone. And that’s comforting, Harry thinks, because at least he knows that you’ll be safe, now.
He just wishes that he could’ve been the one to bring you that bit of solace.
That’s why, when your father invites him over for dinner one night after a particularly strenuous evening of training, he jumps at the opportunity. You’re making lasagna, your father says, having taken a break from studying for exams. Harry agrees to come over, because it’s been a while since he’s had a real, curated, love-infused, home-cooked meal.
And because you’ll be there, too, obviously. But he refrains from letting that incentive slip loose.
His heart is racing nervously when he parks his truck in front of your house. Memories flood his brain, reminding him of what had happened the last time he’d been here—the glint of your necklace under his fingers, the alluring twinkle in your eyes. The softness of your lips against his, the sensation of your nails carding through his hair—
Your father taps on the window of the driver’s seat.
“H?” he says, muffled through the glass. “You coming?”
“Yeah,” Harry chokes out, unbuckling his seatbelt and sliding out of the vehicle. “Yeah, sorry.”
He follows your father up the porch steps, waiting anxiously as the other man unlocks the front door. It swings open; they both step inside. Harry’s eyes widen when your father calls out, “Gioia? I’m home!”
“Hi!” comes your reply.
He freezes when the sound reaches his ears, because he hasn’t heard your voice—much less seen you—in over two weeks. He shuts the door discreetly, removing his shoes and trailing after your father as he pads down the hall. The closer he draws to the kitchen, the more he can smell it—meat, spices, cheese. His stomach rumbles in anticipation.
“Hope you made enough for three,” your father says, entering the room.
Harry lingers behind you, leaning against the wide threshold with his arms crossed protectively over his chest. He’s still a bit sweaty, but he hopes that the lasagna in the oven will mask the musky scent of the perspiration gleaming on his skin.
“Three?” you ask. You’re standing at the sink, your back to them. “Hi, Jason.”
A beat of silence passes, and then—
“Er, not exactly,” Harry grunts.
You stiffen immediately before spinning around. He doesn’t miss the quiet little gasp that leaves your mouth.
Your gaze locks with his, lips parted in surprise, and he can’t help but wonder if coming here was the smartest or the most foolish decision he’s ever made.
~*~
He and your father set the table.
After a few minutes, three plates and three collections of cutlery are laid out over a pristine white cloth. Harry eases into his chair as you carry over a hot tray of lasagna, your hands sheathed in a pair of red oven mittens. You put the pasta down in front of your father, who is sat at the head of the table. He inhales deeply, a small smile forming on his face.
“Smells amazing, sweetheart,” he tells you, nodding in approval. “Even better than your mother’s.”
“That’s a lie,” you tease, chuckling quietly and removing the crimson gloves from your fingers. You cut a large piece from the platter and deposit it onto his dish. “There you go.”
“Thank you,” he says.
He waits patiently as you separate another chunk of pasta for Harry, setting it down on his plate without a word.
“Thank you,” Harry tells you, his voice hoarse.
“You’re welcome,” you say. The response is short, painfully clipped—it makes him wince.
As soon as everyone has food in front of them, you sit down in your chair, reaching for the fork and the knife resting a few inches away from your dish. Before you can dig in, however, you pause, lifting your chin and squeezing your eyes shut.
“Shit,” you murmur. “Forgot the drinks.”
“There’s juice in the fridge, I think,” your father says through a mouthful of pasta.
“No.” You wave his suggestion away. “How about some wine? I’ll grab a bottle from the cellar.”
“Alright.” He nods, but then speaks again as you stand. “Wait—I think the treadmill in the basement is blocking the door. Harry—,” Harry’s head snaps up, nostrils flaring at the mention of his name, “—would you mind going with her? She won’t be able to move it by herself.”
“Uh,” he says stupidly. “Yeah, sure.”
He quickly excuses himself from the table, glancing over at you to register your reaction. Your expression is stony, betraying nothing. You swallow heavily, looking away and marching quickly out of the kitchen. He follows you without another word, hot on your heels.
The basement is dimly-lit, stocked with a few shelves of non-perishable foods and household supplies. Harry remains silent as you make your way over to the far wall, approaching the dark grey treadmill pressed against the door of the cellar. You place both hands on the side of the machine, giving it a firm push and grunting when it budges only an inch.
“You going to help me, or what?” you ask, casting an expectant glance at Harry from over your arm.
He blinks. “Right.”
Together, the two of you manage to ease the treadmill a few feet to the left. It’s enough space for you to open the door of the wine cellar and slip inside. Darkness envelopes your bodies, dissolving only when a small click! echoes through the still air. A moment later, the alcove is illuminated in a dull glow, compliments of the scrawny yellow bulb hanging from the ceiling.
You release the thin string attached to the light, turning around and gasping when you find Harry perched directly behind you. Your chests brush together—the contact sends sparks whizzing down his spine. You spin back around quickly, clearing your throat and scanning all of the different bottles balanced on the shelves.
“Thanks for your help,” you say dryly. “You can go back upstairs, now.”
“I’m good,” Harry mutters.
He clasps his hands behind his back as you trail your index finger along dozens of cream-coloured labels. Your hair is gathered in a low ponytail; a few shorter, wispier strands peek out from behind your ears. You’re not wearing makeup, today—and why would you, Harry thinks, when you’re the most beautiful woman he’s ever seen?
“So,” he starts, itching to break the silence, “your dad told me that you’re filing a restraining order against James.”
“Yeah,” you reply curtly. He waits for you to continue, but you say nothing else.
“Feel better now that you’ve come clean?” he questions. Immediately, he knows that it’s the wrong thing to ask. But it’s out there, now, and he can’t exactly take it back.
A hollow laugh tumbles off of your tongue. Behind you, Harry notices the way you shake your head in disdain.
“You’re ridiculous,” you say under your breath.
“What was that?” He cocks an eyebrow challengingly, frowning at your tone.
“I said that you’re ridiculous,” you gripe, whipping around and fixing him with a fiery glare. “Need me to repeat it again?”
“If that means you’ll finally be speaking to me, then yeah, go for it,” he snaps, folding his arms over his chest.
“I—,” you break off, surprised by the bite in his rebuttal. Harry clenches his jaw when you turn back around. Your hand quivers as you reach for a random bottle of red wine. “I’m not doing this with you right now.”
“When, then?” he demands, taking a step closer. His front skims along your shoulder blades, and when you face him once more, your eyes widen in shock at the close proximity of your bodies. The little room suddenly feels much smaller, walls looming forward and closing you in. Your chest swells as you suck in a deep breath.
“When are we finally going to fucking talk about this?” Harry presses, meeting your gaze. Desperation drips from every syllable of his query.
You purse your lips, exhaling raggedly.
“Soon.”
A feeble assent.
An insipid shake of your head.
You angle your torso to the side, easily slipping past him and out of the cellar.
“But not today.”
    April 10, 2021
Your nose is buried in a textbook when the message comes through.
Cell biology. So much information to remember, so many reactions to list, so many molecules to name. And weeks of studying, just for a two-hour-long final that’ll take place three days from now. If you weren’t so stressed out, the sheer nonsensicality of the situation would have made you laugh.
So when your phone chimes with the alert, you figure that it’s time for a break. A quick conversation with one of your friends, maybe. Something to take your mind off of the looming exam, even if it is just for a few minutes at a time. After that, you’ll get back to revising.
Sadly, nothing is ever that simple.
We need to talk. Come to the gym.
Your eyes widen when the words sink in. As you rub your clammy palms against the grey material of your sweatpants, another text pops up below the first.
Please.
You shouldn’t. You need to study. But even as you warn yourself against it, your brain is already coming up with a multitude of reasons to meet with him. It’s just one night. Your exam isn’t for another few days. You have time. You deserve to take a break.
Your keys jingle cheerfully as you toss them into your bag.
~*~
Harry is going to town when you walk into the gym.
You’re not quite sure how that poor punching bag has managed to stay balanced on its hook. Harry’s coming at it from every angle, pummeling the leather with hard, heavy fists. He’s wearing a black tank top today; deep armholes cut into the sides of the fabric and expose most of his torso. The dark tattoos on his skin glisten under a thin sheen of sweat; a small, stupid part of you expects the ink to run and smudge before you remember that the designs are permanent.
What’s even worse? Dangerous Woman by Ariana Grande is playing on his phone. The soft, feathery croons of her voice mix with the low grunts that escape Harry’s throat—sounds that claw their way out of him with each blow delivered to the bag. Under normal circumstances, the juxtaposition would have made you snort.
Now though, it just reminds you of that night all those months ago, when you’d asked him to teach you how to box. This entire train wreck could have been avoided if you’d simply kept your mouth shut.
Harry still hasn’t noticed you. How could he, when you’re standing behind him?
You clear your throat. He freezes mid-strike.
His grassy eyes are wide when he turns around.
“Hi,” he says, surprised. “I—I didn’t think you would come.”
“I was halfway here when I realised that I didn’t text you back,” you reply, scratching awkwardly at the nape of your neck. “But, like…no handheld devices behind the wheel, and all that jazz.”
His lips twitch. “Yeah. Good.”
You cross your arms over your chest, scanning your surroundings. You don’t know why you do that—nothing in the gym has changed. You’re just trying to avoid Harry’s gaze, which is a lot easier said than done.
“You, um…you wanted to talk?”
“Yeah.” He nods, walking over to the ring and pausing the music streaming from his phone.
He then reaches for two pairs of boxing gloves, nestling one in the crook of his elbow and tossing the other at you. The strap of your purse slides from your shoulder as you catch the leather in your arms. You peer down at the gloves, eyes narrowing in confusion before you train them back on him.
“I don’t get it,” you deadpan.
“Really?” Harry asks. He hoists himself onto the raised platform of the ring and slips through the gaps in the ropes. “Because you’ve been begging to go up against me since January. Are you seriously gonna back out now?”
“Go up against—” The rest of your sentence fizzles out. “I…I thought you wanted to have a conversation, not a competition.”
He shrugs, regarding you evenly as he pulls his gloves on and tightens the straps around his wrists. He then bumps his enclosed fists together, tilting his head to the side.
“Why can’t we do both?”
~*~
You look pretty, Harry thinks.
Standing on the far side of the ring, wearing a black tank top, grey sweatpants, and bright pink sneakers—yeah, you look pretty. You’ve cuffed your bottoms so that they’re rolled up to the spot just below your knees, and your hair has been pulled back into a low bun. There’s no emotion on your face as you stare him down, taking a few steps closer and assuming a fighting stance.
You’ve gotten better—he’ll be the first to admit it. But he’s going to beat you, and you both know it. It’s just a matter of when.
He decides that, for the time being, he’ll go easy on you. The two of you will talk things out, and afterward, he might let you win. Maybe. He’s still on the fence about that.
You both begin to move in a circle. After a long moment of silence, Harry says, “You go first.”
“No, you,” you grit out. He just shrugs.
Fine. Have it your way.
You block the straight, pointed jab that he throws, and pride swells up in his chest. It’s a simple punch to deflect, but nevertheless, it tells him that you’ve learned something over these past few months. And that means that he’s done a good job as your teacher.
As your friend…not so much.
Do friends kiss other friends the same way you’d kissed him in front of your house?
He really doesn’t know.
“Right, then,” Harry starts, nodding. “Let’s talk.”
“About what?” you ask. Your nose wrinkles in concentration as you direct a blow toward his stomach. He blocks it easily. “About how you kissed me back and then told me you didn’t have feelings for me?”
“I—,” he’s stunned, because okay, you’re coming right on out with it. “I’m sorry.”
He’s sorry for lying, but you don’t seem to realise that.
“I was so fucking embarrassed,” you say, lunging forward and throwing a cross at his nose. He bats your fist away like it’s nothing more than a pesky fly. “But I guess that I’m mad at myself, too. Here I am, starting to like you, meanwhile I barely know anything about you.”
“What do you want to know?” he asks, keeping his arms in front of his face.
(Deep down, beneath his stoic exterior, he can’t believe what he’s hearing. You had been ‘starting to like’ him? He’s scared, then, because that means he ruined everything that night in his truck. Do you still feel the same way?)
Harry blinks—shakes his head free of those thoughts and continues. “Ask me, and I’ll tell you.”
“Really,” you reply, though it isn’t exactly a question.
You drop your hands, taken aback by his offer. He’s not usually this open—you should seize the opportunity to probe while it’s still available. You will, he thinks. Over these past few months, he’s learned how you operate. You’re not predictable, by any means, but he knows that you can’t resist inquiring about his personal life when given the chance.
You want to know him. If he thinks about it for too long, his affections become exceedingly difficult to bear.
“Really,” he says.
He steps forward and curves his right arm in a powerful hook. You yelp jarringly when the rough leather of his glove makes contact with your left shoulder. He just shrugs, pulling back.
“Remember: don’t let your guard down.”
You clench your jaw and raise your fists once more.
“Fine, then,” you say, sidestepping another one of his jabs. “Where were you born?”
“Redditch, England,” he answers simply. “Moved to Holmes Chapel when I was a kid, though.”
You nod. The two of you continue to circle each other.
“Got any siblings?” you ask, charging him and attempting to deliver a series of punches to his torso. He deflects each of them with his forearms, never faltering.
“A sister,” he says, unbothered. “She lives back home.”
“And what about your parents?” you press, retreating and watching him with careful eyes.
He swallows roughly, shaking his head. “Dad left when I was seven. Mum died when I was fourteen.”
At that, you pause. You heed his earlier advice and keep your hands in front of your face, but it’s clear that his confession has caught you by surprise. Your gaze softens, and he watches as your lips curl down into a sympathetic frown.
“I’m sorry,” you tell him quietly, your shoulders slouching. “That’s terrible.”
He shrugs. “It’s in the past—can’t change it, now.”
He takes advantage of your pitying nature, springing toward you and aiming a punch for your hip. You barely manage to avoid the blow, jumping back at the last second. His glove scrapes swiftly against your side. The attack seems to snap you out of your emotions, because you scowl deeply and return to your original stance.
“What happened after that?” you ask, breathing erratically.
“They put me in foster care,” Harry says, shaking his head. “It was shit, though. I ran away after a couple of years. Went off on my own—that’s when I met your dad.”
“And he started training you?”
“And he started training me,” he confirms with a curt nod. “Couldn’t actually fight until I turned eighteen, but after that…I was taking up as many matches as I could.” He chuckles warmly at the memory. “Your dad said that he’d never seen anything like it. Told me I had to slow down.”
You smile a bit at his words. Your fondness quickly melts into shock, however, when Harry aims a hit for your face. You block the punch, retaliating quickly and throwing one of your own. Your fist makes contact with the barrier of his chest, and he stumbles backward, his eyes widening in disbelief. You got him.
Only once, but still.
You got him.
“Not bad,” he grunts, squaring his shoulders. “Maybe I should actually start trying, now.”
You grit your teeth, glowering at him. “God, you’re such a dick.”
He flashes you a contemptuous grin before lunging forward. You dodge two of his punches, but the third one catches you right in the stomach, making you double over and cough. Harry retreats, a mischievous smirk on his face.
“Done getting to know me?” he simpers.
You shake your head, straightening back up. “Not yet.”
You make a valiant effort, Harry thinks. Your dedication is commendable. But he’s had a decade of training, whereas you’ve only had a few months. Your technique—though improved—is still sloppy. And that’s what allows him to sidestep all of your strikes and react quickly, enough so that he’s got you pinned to the ground in just under two minutes.
You’re panting heavily; one of his forearms holds your crossed wrists down over your head. His other hand is planted on the floor just above your shoulder, the flat front of his boxing glove providing a stable surface to keep him balanced. His knees are next to your waist as he hovers over your stomach, giving you no room to worm out of his grip. You flail your legs in frustration, but he’s perched too high up on your body for the action to do any real damage.
“I win,” he says simply, arrogance dancing in his eyes. He leans down so that your noses are only inches apart. “Any more questions, baby?”
“Just one,” you bite, panting heavily.
He cocks an eyebrow, waiting for the inquiry to leave your lips. Once it does, however, it knocks every molecule of air from his lungs.
“Have you…,” you inhale deeply, “…ever been in love?”
The expression on your face tells him that you know exactly what you’re doing. Your chest heaves with exertion, and when his gaze flickers down to your breasts for only a fraction of a second, your eyes illumine with realisation.
“You want me,” you tell him, breathless. A thin, reflective layer of perspiration has gathered at your hairline. Your arms twitch from where they’re pinned beneath his. Despite the gloves still covering your hands, you grasp at his slippery skin, hoping that the contact will somehow make his already-weak resolve crack and crumble into nothing.
“No,” he says, his voice hard.
His green irises burn into your face. Who is he trying to convince?
“You’re lying,” you wheeze, shaking your head. “You want me.”
Your skin is hot. He can feel you radiating warmth like a fireplace. Heated, cozy, welcoming—it’s everything he loves about you, everything he’s been craving since he first became conscious of how badly he desired you. And, to top it all off, you’re looking at him like that—with eyes that could persuade him to jump from a skyscraper, if you so much as asked.
Just like that.
“Fuck,” Harry spits. He pulls back sharply and stamps his own eyes shut. His nose screws up in frustration. “Fuck.”
And then he’s kissing you.
The elated moan that slips from your lips has his cock twitching fitfully in his shorts. You arch your back to get closer to him, because with his hand still pinning you down, it’s not like you can throw your arms around his neck and bring him to you. The kiss is messy and frenzied and hot and carnal. Harry licks into your mouth, savouring the squeak that echoes in your throat.
You’re vocal—he’s going to fucking die.
When the two of you pull back, no words are exchanged. Harry stares down at you, taking note of how your pupils have dilated immensely. Your chest is still heaving, but this time, it’s for a completely different reason. He releases your wrists from where they’re pinned beneath his forearm, watching you carefully as he sits up.
He lifts his fist to his face and takes the strap of the glove between his teeth. The sharp riiip! that ensues may as well be a starter gunshot.
You both dive back into a sea of teeth and lips and tongue. Harry throws off his gloves easily. You struggle with yours, but he wastes no time, helping you discard them in a matter of seconds. With your hands finally free, you bury them in his hair, pulling at the soft, damp tendrils as he presses several hard kisses to your mouth.
“Fuck,” he mutters, slanting his body downward so that his crotch is level with yours. “You—you have no idea—”
The rest of his sentence fades into a groan when you suck harshly on his jaw. He shudders at the sensation.
Gradually, you bring your legs out from beneath his own, lifting your knees up to your chest and then wrapping your thighs around his waist. It’s an impressive feat, if he’s being honest. And it gives him more room to lean over you, to grind his cock against your centre through the layers of fabric separating your skin.
“Off—,” you choke, tugging at the bottom of his black shirt. “Get this off!”
He complies, sitting back up on his knees and ridding himself of the fabric. You take advantage of his instability, wrapping one hand around his bicep and giving it a hard shove. He topples to the side and you scramble up to straddle him, a small, smug smile ghosting across your face.
“What are you—?” he starts, but you place one finger against his lips, cutting him off.
You start to roll your hips gently into his—he groans, wishing more than anything that there were no clothes in the way. Goosebumps erupt on his arms when you lightly scrape your nails down his bare chest. You settle at the butterfly inked into his abdomen, tracing the insect’s wings with a wondrous look in your eyes. His palms sweep up your thighs.
“Why did you lie to me?” you murmur, keeping your gaze trained on his torso. “You feel the same, don’t you?”
He nods wordlessly.
“Why, then?” you press, frowning gently. “I—we could’ve avoided this whole thing if you’d just told me the truth.”
“Your dad,” Harry says weakly. “I can’t—you’re his—”
“My dad has no control over who I date or who I fuck,” you say. He’s stunned by the crudeness of your claim. “And if I want to fuck you right here, right now, then that’s what I’m going to do.”
“You—Christ,” he swallows heavily, squeezing his eyes shut. “You can’t just say shit like that.”
“Why not?” you smirk, grinding against him harshly and feeling the stiff outline of his cock in his shorts. “You seem to be enjoying it.”
“Fuck,” he grunts. You shriek when he flips the two of you over so that he’s back on top. His nose brushes against yours as he speaks.
“If we do this,” he warns, hot breath fanning out over your chin, “I won’t be gentle. In every single one of my fantasies, I’ve ruined you—made you drool, made you cry. You name it, I’ve done it. You sure you can handle that?”
“Yes,” you breathe, utterly enthralled. “I’m sure.”
Harry tucks a loose piece of your hair behind your ear, peering down at you tenderly.
“Look so pretty,” he coos, fingers skimming down the side of your throat. “Can’t wait to wreck your cute, little—” He sucks in a deep breath, weakened by the shamelessness of his own thoughts. “Gonna make sure your knees knock together once I’m through with you.”
And maybe it’s not smart to get you naked in the middle of the gym, where anyone walking by could easily peer inside and witness him fucking you into oblivion. But he can’t find it in himself to care—he’s been waiting for this moment for years, and damn him if he doesn’t seize it while you’re like this: open, inviting, presented to him like gourmet food on a silver platter.
And speaking of food…
“I’m gonna stretch you out,” Harry states. “You’ve got to cum first if you wanna take my cock, understand?”
You nod rapidly.
He shakes his head. “Need to hear you say it, baby. You want it, too, right?”
“I want it,” you confirm, breathless. “I want it, I understand.”
He smiles. His fingers ruck up the material of your tank top, and you lift your back from the ground to help him remove it. Your bra is next, pale pink with a simple bow resting between the cups. He swears when you unclip it quickly, letting the straps fall down your shoulders before tossing it away.
“Christ,” he says, blinking. “Can’t believe you’re real.”
He lays you back down onto the floor of the ring, ducking his head and enveloping one of your nipples in his mouth. You moan. The bud hardens between his teeth, sensitive to his touch. He sucks harshly before pulling off, littering kisses along the skin of your breasts. His head swims with lust, transforming him into someone nearly unrecognizable. You seem to like it, though, so how bad could it really be?
“Next time,” Harry murmurs into your flesh, “I’m gonna get a proper taste. Eat you out ’til you go blind. But for now—,” he dips his hand past the waistband of your sweatpants, “—my fingers will just have to do.”
You shimmy your bottoms down, kicking them off unceremoniously and spreading your legs. And fuck, he nearly loses it right there, because this is what he’s been picturing for months, if not years. Having you laid out in front of him, exposed and ready and willing. Your thighs stretched wide, miles of soft skin leading inward and morphing into sticky, wet folds. He closes his eyes for a brief moment and inhales deeply—the scent of your arousal floods his nose, rendering him utterly helpless. Something akin to a man unhinged.
He rubs you over your panties, first. They’re nothing special—simple black cotton covering your mound and your hipbones. But fuck him, he wasn’t expecting the ocean of excitement that seems to have pooled and soaked through the fabric. His fingertips are damp when he pulls them away.
“You’re drenched,” he groans, shaking his head in disbelief. He hooks one digit into the elastic of your underwear, looking up at you with inquisitive eyes. “Can I take these off?”
“Yes, please.”
He tears the material down your legs, and then you’re naked beneath him, save for the rose-gold pendant resting on your sternum. He sits back on his heels as you spread your thighs wider, chewing on the inside of your cheek. His index finger taps the skin just below your navel, tracing a path down to where you need him most. You whine when he bypasses your clit completely, dropping instead to gather some of your wetness before trailing back up. He smears your arousal over the nub—just to get a steady, slippery rhythm going—and then leans down, pressing his forehead against yours.
“Don’t wanna be too far,” he says sheepishly, sweetly kissing the tip of your nose. “Missed you.”
You seal your lips to his.
He makes you cum after a few minutes, slipping one finger into your channel, and then another. The entire time, his thumb stays perched on your clit, drawing expert circles and pulling wanton moans from your mouth. And when you cum—oh.
Oh.
You’re glorious, with lidded eyes and warm cheeks and teeth bared in pleasure. You ride out your high, spasming gently. Harry lays a firm hand on your stomach, feeling the muscles of your abdomen twitch beneath his palm. He continues to stimulate your clit, basking in the little aftershocks that zip up your spine and make your legs tremble.
If you were aroused before…good fucking God. He didn’t know it was possible for a woman to be this wet.
You kiss him as you come down from your orgasm, nipping softly at his bottom lip and sighing in relief. Both of his hands find your face—you seem unbothered by the fact that his fingers are coated in your juices, smearing messily against your cheek. He melts into you like he’s dying of thirst and you’re an oasis, lush and green and good. So, so good.
“Do you—,” he exhales raggedly, “—do you still want to?”
You nod, a soft smile forming on your face. It’s crazy, Harry thinks, how quickly you can oscillate between actual human sunshine and the devil personified. One minute, you’re asking him to fuck you, and the next, you’re giving him those eyes that make him feel as though every cell in his body has been liquefied.
“What were you saying about not being gentle?” you tease.
He chuckles quietly, shaking his head. You gasp when he hooks a finger into the chain around your neck. He takes your pretty pink pendant between two fingers, lifting it up and dragging the cool metal along the seam of your lips. You inhale sharply.
“I don’t have a condom,” he murmurs, sighing mournfully.
“I have an IUD,” you whisper, playing with the curls at the back of his head. “We’re good.”
He groans, dropping his face into the column of your throat. “You’re fuckin’ marvelous.”
You giggle.
He shudders when you begin to push his shorts down. You look up at him with raised brows when his cock slaps against his stomach, completely unrestrained.
“No underwear?”
“Always sticks to my balls when I get sweaty,” he whines, squeezing his eyes shut. “Need to let the boys breathe.”
A loud laugh flops out of your mouth. Harry snickers, too, trailing his nose up over your jawline so that he can catch your lips in a quick kiss. He moans as you wrap your fingers around his length, giving a few experimental pumps. Instinctively, his hips buck into your grip.
“You’re big,” you murmur. “Are you sure that it’s going to fit?”
“It’ll fit,” he promises.
He guides your legs up so that they’re wrapped around his waist, allowing him to slot himself closer to you. You gasp when his hand finds your cunt again, dipping two fingers inside before sweeping his palm over the length of your folds. He then smears your wetness along the shaft of his cock, makeshift lubrication to facilitate the first breach of your channel.
“You ready?” he says, positioning the tip of his dick at your entrance. “Deep breath for me, yeah?”
“Yeah.” You inhale, and he nudges his hips forward. You gasp as he slips into you, inch by thick inch, stretching you out in a way that you’ve never felt before. Harry reaches for your hands, tangling your fingers together and lifting them above your head. You arch your back with the new position, and he’s unsure of whether you’re trying to wiggle away or bring him in closer.
When the heels of your feet press against his ass, guiding him deeper, he assumes that it’s the latter.
“Fuck,” he stammers as your tight heat surrounds his cock. “How—how do you feel this good?”
A wheezing laugh punches its way out of your throat.
“Feel that,” Harry says hoarsely. “So fuckin’ hot and—and wet. Not gonna take any time at all, is it?”
“For me, or for you?” you taunt. He grumbles quietly, and you snicker.
After a brief moment of silence, you squeeze his knuckles reassuringly. “You can move.”
“Thank you,” he moans, capturing your mouth with his. Your breathing hitches as he pulls out before slowly sliding back in. When you sigh in response, he takes it as encouragement to pick up the pace.
Soon, he’s fucking into you quickly, your skin slapping together in a series of brutal thrusts. With each drive of his hips into yours, soft whimpers escape your lips, floating up into the hot air and melting like ice cream under the sun. Harry growls, sinking his teeth into the junction between your neck and your shoulder. The pain makes you writhe—in a good way.
“You don’t know how many times I’ve imagined this,” he grunts, laving his tongue over the indents on your skin. Your necklaces clink together—silver and rose-gold tangled in a mess of thin, delicate chains. “My—my hand could never—”
“Neither could mine,” you tell him, breathless.
His spine stiffens at your words, brain overcome with the thought of you lying in bed, your fingers buried between your legs and low whines pouring from your mouth. He groans; his next thrust is hard, keen, unforgiving.
He keeps you close, your bodies never separating. Your skin is slick with sweat, chests gliding together. Adrenaline rushes through Harry’s veins—he drives ahead, plunging inside of you with each fierce snap of his hips. You can’t do anything but lie there and take it, take it, take it.
“I want you,” he gasps, warm air washing out onto your collarbones. His hands are clammy, still locked with yours; he wouldn’t have it any other way. “I want you, I want you, I—” He gulps. “I’ve wanted you for so long.”
“Harry,” you murmur, grazing your nose against his temple. “Harry, look at me.”
Reluctantly, he pulls his face away from your throat. Your eyes are soft when they land on his, forehead shining with sweat, lips swollen and raw. The bun holding most of your hair back has come loose (Harry is certain that it’s due to the way your bodies shift along the ground with every thrust.)
You swallow roughly and shake your head, staring past his features and searching for something deeper.
“I’m not going anywhere,” you say, nearly crushing his fingers in your grip. “I’m here.”
Your walls pulsate around him, and his rhythm falters. He swears softly, releasing one of your hands so that he can bring his thumb down to rub haphazard shapes against your clit. You moan, surprised.
“Cum for me,” he orders, nodding rapidly. “Cum for me, and then I’ll do the same. Where do you want it, hm? Tell me.”
“Inside,” you pant, your nose screwing up in pleasure. “Cum inside me.”
“Shit, you’re serious?” he asks, awestruck. His stomach twists hotly at your invitation. “Want me to claim your pretty cunt? Is that it?”
“God,” you say. You squirm beneath him, nodding frantically. “Please!”
“Fuck!” he cries, and when you clamp down on his cock, he’s gone.
The two of you ride out your highs together, quivering and grunting in unison. Harry wraps his arms around your waist, holding you close to his chest. You dig your nails into his back, clinging to him like a piece of wood drifting through the stormy sea. Colourful spots dance in his vision—he tries his best to blink them away. Your thighs tremble around his hips, caught in an endless cycle of vibrations.
“Holy shit,” you whimper, exhaling shakily. “That was…”
Harry braces himself over your face, keeping you shielded from everything outside of your little bubble.
“Yeah,” he agrees.
A low laugh falls from your lips, but it quickly morphs into a moan when he pulls out of you. He pauses for a moment, watching as white liquid trickles from your abused entrance. The erotic sight nearly has him ready to go again.
“Fuck,” he mutters. He scoops his release up with two fingers and plugs them back inside of you. “That’s hot.”
You gasp at the slight overstimulation, wrapping a hand around his wrist reflexively. He just shoots you a wicked grin, which has you giggling girlishly in response.
“I want a kiss,” you say, craning your neck.
Harry hums, crawling up your body to fulfill your request. You smile against his lips, tossing your arms over his shoulders. The two of you exchange soft pecks for the next few minutes, basking in the aftereffects of your orgasms. Warmth unfurls in Harry’s chest, potent and contagious. It spreads through his veins, dousing his senses in a golden glow.
“You’re fucking incredible,” he tells you, nuzzling his nose against your cheek. “And I like you. So much.”
“I like you, too,” you reply, tracing your fingertips over the muscles in his back. “But if you ever lie to me again—” Your expression grows serious. “—let’s just say that you won’t have to worry anymore about your boxers sticking to your balls, okay?”
It’s an earnest threat—he knows that you mean every word—but nevertheless, it makes him laugh. You giggle along with him; he rolls off of you, his spine meeting the floor of the ring, and you cuddle into his side. Your nails tap languidly against his sternum as he wraps an arm around your shoulders. The two of you lie there for a few long moments, enjoying the peaceful silence.
“They’re taking my case against James to trial,” you say at last.
Harry stiffens, lifting his head so that he can look down at you properly.
“That’s a good thing, isn’t it?” he asks.
“Yeah.” You nod, refusing to meet his gaze. “But, um…my lawyer said that it might be a good idea to bring a witness to the stand. Just to seal the deal and stuff.”
You peek up at him shyly, and it clicks.
“Oh,” he says softly. “You want me?”
“Only if you’re comfortable with it,” you say hurriedly, resting your chin on his chest. “Please don’t think that I’m forcing you—”
“Hey, no,” he cuts you off, sweeping his fingers through your hair. The action soothes you, makes your eyelids flutter shut and your lips tremble with a nervous exhale. “’Course I’ll testify. I don’t want that piece of shit coming anywhere near you.”
“Thank you,” you murmur, pressing your mouth to his skin. You litter a few grateful kisses along his pectorals, and he smiles. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”
“Don’t have to keep saying that,” Harry mumbles, chuckling tenderly. He takes your face between his hands, thumbs trailing idly over your temples. “I wanna keep you safe. Or—or make you feel safe, at least.”
Your eyes glisten.
“I do feel safe around you,” you say. Your lips twitch. “Except for when you’re trying to punch me in the gut.”
He snickers, shaking his head. “If you want to start tussling with me more often, you’re gonna have to get used to that.”
“Duly noted.” You smirk.
Harry sighs, letting his head fall back against the ground.
“Speaking of keeping you safe…,” he mutters, staring up at the ceiling. His fingers resume their previous ministrations, stroking languidly through your hair. “You should go pee, yeah? Heard it’s important for girls to do that after sex.”
You laugh, surprised by his words. “How—how do you know that?”
“Sister,” he reminds you. His cheeks dimple as he grins.
You nod, mouth curling into a fond smile. “Right.”
    April 26, 2021
The crowd is deafening, encasing him in a cloud of noise. He refuses to let it distract him, zeroing in on his opponent with the intensity of a thousand suns. An experimental jab comes his way, gauging the distance between them, but Harry sidesteps it easily. He retaliates with a right hook, catching the side of the man’s head. It’s not a powerful blow, but it succeeds in disorienting him for a few milliseconds.
He charges forward, then, sensing an opportunity and seizing it before it can fade away. In a flurry of fists (and the odd kick here and there), he backs his opponent up until the ropes around the ring are digging into the man’s waist. He’s ruthless, giving him no chance to react, delivering blow after blow until his rival can barely stand on his own two feet. At that point, he retreats, stepping back and letting his victory come to him.
He needs this win. He needs this win. He needs this—
His challenger falls into the trap, stumbling forward with double vision and throwing a sloppy hook. Harry bats his hand away effortlessly, lunging forward and curving his arm up. Pride flares in his chest when his fist makes contact with his opponent’s jaw, making the man’s head snap back on his neck. He drops to the floor in an unconscious, muscular heap.
The seconds pass by like molasses, but at last, the referee is climbing into the ring and lifting Harry’s hand high above his head. The crowd roars. He closes his eyes for a moment, basking in the praise. When they flutter open again, they’re trailing upward, searching for one particular face in a sea of strangers.
And there you are.
You’re beaming, clapping frantically and pausing every so often to cup your hands around your mouth and amplify your cheers. Harry smiles, tilting his chin upward and letting his head fall back in relief. He doesn’t tear his gaze away from you, even as the referee releases his wrist and crouches to rouse his opponent from the ground.
He hears someone call his name and turns to the side. He finds your father peeking at him through the ropes circling the ring, a wide grin on his face. He beckons him over, a water bottle clutched tightly in his outstretched hand. Harry complies, breathing out a heavy sigh.
Meanwhile, you’re pushing through the throng of people that have now started moving toward the exit. Going against the current is difficult—you murmur quick apologies as you nudge past countless shoulders and elbows—but finally, you emerge from the crowd, unscathed. You see Harry chatting with a few people approximately thirty feet away, but before you can take another step, a big, burly security guard blocks your path.
“No spectators beyond this point,” he tells you gruffly.
“But, I—,” your mouth opens and closes, though no words come out. Instinctively, you point over the guard’s shoulder, your finger pinned on a very sweaty, very shirtless Harry. “That’s my boyfriend.”
You only have a moment to feel shocked by your claim. Boyfriend?
It’s been weeks since that night at the gym, and yeah, you suppose that the two of you are a thing, now. You’re going out. You’re exclusive. Whatever the hell you want to call it.
But you’ve never referred to him as your boyfriend, and he’s never referred to you as his girlfriend. You haven’t talked about potentially putting a label on your relationship, despite the fact that you’re both clearly interested in seeing each other and no one else.
Is it time to have that conversation?
Harry jumps in surprise when he hears you call his name. He turns toward the sound and then grunts when you barrel into him a moment later, wrapping your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist. One of his hands reflexively falls to your bottom before quickly moving away. The feeling of his calloused palm on your ass sends a shiver down your spine.
You bury your face in his shoulder. He’s sweating all over, skin wet and muscles bulging from exertion. You know that you’ve caught him off-guard, because he whispers your name incredulously into your ear and presses a gentle kiss to your jaw. When he finally sets you down, you peer up at him with bright eyes and a large grin.
“That was incredible,” you gush, your hands falling to his biceps. “You obliterated him!”
“Thanks,” he chuckles. His cheeks are pink—you don’t think it’s because of the match.
In the periphery of your vision, you catch sight of your father. He’s standing there with raised brows and parted lips, and you suddenly remember that he hasn’t yet been made aware of your…situation. You gasp, stepping away from Harry quickly and draping your arms around your own torso. He seems to recognize your blunder as well, because his shoulders tense and his eyes nearly pop out of his head.
The two of you speak at the same time.
“Coach—”
“Dad—”
“I don’t want to know,” your father announces, holding up one hand and cutting you both off swiftly. His eyes bounce back and forth between you, features betraying no emotion whatsoever. Finally, his shoulders slump.
“I’m gonna call it a night, gioia,” he tells you. He then looks to the left, directing his next words at Harry. “Congratulations on your win, H. Have her home by midnight.”
“Dad, I’m a grown woman—,” you begin to scoff, but he gives you a pointed glare.
“Midnight,” he repeats.
You shrink away and nod.
~*~
Before leaving, Harry decides to take a quick shower in the men’s locker room. You sit on one of the benches, tapping your foot against the tiles as you watch him get undressed. It doesn’t take him long—he’s only wearing a pair of shorts, after all—but you savour every moment, your eyes raking over his muscular back as he bends down to pick his bottoms up off of the ground. He tosses the fabric into his drawstring bag before peering over his shoulder at you.
“Sure you don’t wanna join me?” he asks, a coy smirk playing on his lips when he catches you staring.
You look away quickly, picking at your nails and feigning indifference. “Where anyone could walk in? I’m good.”
He shrugs, snickering quietly. “Suit yourself.”
You ogle his plump ass as he walks away.
A moment later, one of the showers turns on. You can hear Harry humming softly as he steps under the spray. You sigh, leaning back against the wall and fishing your phone out from your pocket. For the next few minutes, you scroll distractedly through social media, bored out of your mind.
You grunt softly and set your phone down, tiptoeing over to the door of the locker room and fastening it shut. The lock above the handle slides into place with a low click!
“Fuck it,” you mutter.
You flick open the button of your jeans, shoving the material down your thighs. Eventually, you’re naked, goosebumps pebbling on your arms. You set your clothes back down onto the bench and grab a spare towel, fiddling with the necklace hanging from your throat. A thought occurs to you; you unclasp the chain, pulling it off and letting it pool in the palm of your hand.
Harry’s idle singing grows louder as you approach the row of showers. It’s not hard to find his cubicle—it’s the only one with the curtain drawn over the entrance. You pad toward it, hanging your towel next to his and calling out, “Harry?”
“Yeah?” His hums stop.
You grasp the fabric of the curtain, pulling it back and peering inside. Immediately, Harry’s gaze locks with yours. He’s completely bare, standing beneath the water with hooded eyes and shampoo foaming in his hair. You slip into the cubicle, not missing the way he gawks at your naked body.
“I changed my mind,” you murmur, peering up at him shyly.
He presses his lips together to fight back a smile. “Yeah. You sure did.”
“Shut up and let me rinse your hair.”
“Yes, ma’am.”
Before you can bury your hands into the wet strands, however, you remember the jewellery clutched between your fingers.
“Actually—,” you say, hesitating. “I, um—I wanted to give this to you.”
You scoop the necklace up from your palm, holding it out nervously. Harry recognizes it immediately, and his eyes widen in surprise.
“What for?” he asks, not unkindly.
“It’s my lucky charm,” you tell him, shrugging your shoulders. “I just figured…maybe it’ll work for you, too.”
He kisses you, then, grabbing your face in his hands and crushing his lips to yours. You whimper into his mouth, finding his wrists and encasing them in a tight grip. The kiss is passionate, bruising, fiery—you’ve never felt so wanted.
Harry pulls back once the two of you run out of air. Even then, he keeps his forehead pressed snugly against yours, staying close. He’s breathing heavily, and you’re starting to sweat, the humidity of the stall seeping into every last pore on your body. Harry shakes his head, gazing into your eyes.
“You’re my lucky charm,” he says.
Your heartbeat stutters in your chest.
“But,” he continues, smiling softly, “I’ll take the necklace. It’ll be good to have for when you’re not there.”
You nod wordlessly, and he steps back. His hands find his throat, fumbling with the chain dangling over his collarbones. He reaches over his shoulders, unclasping his own necklace and presenting it to you.
“Here,” he says. “I’ll take yours, and you take mine.”
You nod again.
You turn around slowly, electricity thrumming through your body as Harry guides the silver chain around your neck. The shiny cross pendant rests against your sternum; the warmth of the metal seeps into your skin. When you face him again, Harry whistles lowly, his lips twitching.
“Looks good on you,” he says, nodding proudly. “My girl.”
“Is that what I am?” you ask, peeking up at him through your lashes. “Your girl?”
He pauses. He really does look ridiculous with the white, frothing shampoo slicked through his hair.
“Is that what you want to be?”
A moment of silence ensues.
“Yeah,” you finally say, biting your bottom lip. “It is.”
Harry smiles. He leans forward and kisses you again, softer this time. You nudge his shoulder with the hand that’s still holding your necklace, prompting him to spin around.
“Come on,” you murmur, delivering one last affectionate peck to his mouth. “Your turn.”
~*~
Harry pulls up to your house fifteen minutes before midnight. You unbuckle your seatbelt, modifying your position in the front seat so that you can look at him properly. Your hair is still slightly damp from your shared shower, and your skin is fresh and clean. You smell like him—like the body wash you had both used to scrub yourselves down in the small cubicle. A silver necklace—his necklace—peeks out from beneath the collar of your denim jacket.
The jewellery suits you. He doesn’t ever want you to take it off.
The two of you stare at each other for a moment until you eventually crack a smile.
“You look like you want to eat me,” you say, laughing.
“C’mere, then,” he chuckles, already leaning forward. “Lemme have a taste.”
“Gross.” You stick your tongue out playfully but obey him nonetheless, your lips meeting over the middle console of the vehicle. Harry cups your face in one hand, keeping you close. You sigh into his mouth, and he swallows the sound down—it’s the prettiest fucking thing he’s ever heard.
You carry on like that for the next few minutes, exchanging soft kisses that don’t go beyond him placing a calloused palm on your thigh. When you finally pull away, a breathless giggle bubbles up in your throat.
“Have I ever told you that you’re a great kisser?” you ask.
“Only a dozen times a day,” he replies, smirking gently.
You laugh, carding your fingers through his hair and tilting your head to the side as you stare at him. Your eyes are far away, getting lost in your own thoughts, it seems.
“What is it?” he whispers, even though there’s no one else in the car aside from you and him.
“I love you,” you murmur absentmindedly.
Harry freezes; your confession knocks the air from his lungs.
“What?” he says, his brows knitting together.
At last, you snap out of your trance. Your admission sinks in, and you recoil, shocked at your own boldness.
“I—,” you start, your eyes growing impossibly wide. “I just meant—we’ve known each other for years, now, but I feel like I really got to know you these past few months. These past few weeks, especially.”
You shrug, playing nervously with the silver cross hanging around your neck. Harry’s heart somersaults at the sight.
“I’m sorry if it’s bad timing,” you continue; you’re rambling, now. “And I understand that it might be weird considering the fact that we just put a label on this, but—,” you break off, taking a deep breath, “—I love you. I do.”
He reaches out, trailing his fingers over the faint curve of your jaw. You gasp softly when his thumb ghosts over your bottom lip.
“Did you just apologise for telling me that you love me?” he says. Crinkles appear at the corners of his eyes.
You squeeze your own eyes shut, cringing at his words and shaking your head.
“Don’t repeat it,” you plead. “I’m already embarrassed enough.”
“Oh, so loving me is embarrassing?” he asks, smirking slyly.
You frown, batting his hand away and shifting your body so that you’re no longer facing him. You place your elbow against the ledge of the passenger door, resting your chin on your fist and staring pointedly out the window.
“Hey,” Harry coos, though he can’t stop the inkling of laughter that seeps into his voice. “Don’t be like that.”
“I take it back,” you say flatly, refusing to turn around. “I hate you, actually.”
“Really,” he says, but it’s not a question. He unbuckles his own seatbelt so that he can lean over the middle console and nuzzle at your cheek.
“My girlfriend hates me?” he asks; he knows that he’s being insufferable, but he can’t help it. Messing with you is so much fun.
“Yes.” Your response is curt. “She does.”
“That’s not nice,” he says, curling his lips down into a dramatic pout. He presses a gentle kiss to the side of your neck—right against a particular spot that makes you melt every single time. He knows it, and so do you.
“That’s not nice at all,” Harry continues, littering sloppy pecks down the column of your throat. “This how you treat the man who loves you?”
You pause when his words register in your brain.
“Stop lying,” you mutter, keeping your gaze glued to the scenery outside your window.
“’M not lying,” he tells you, squeezing your thigh gently. “Said you’d cut my balls off if I did it again, remember?”
And despite your initial sense of humiliation, you laugh. Harry smiles, placing his free hand on your cheek and guiding you to look over at him. You submit to his wishes, gazing at him through pretty, wispy lashes. He tilts forward ever-so-slightly, nudging your noses together and fastening his lips to yours. When he pulls back after a moment, he pinches your chin between two fingers.
“I love you,” he says earnestly.
“I love you, too,” you whisper.
Your eyelids flutter shut as he slides his palm up your leg; he stops only once it’s resting in the crease between your hip and your thigh, dangerously close to your groin.
“We have—,” he cranes his neck, peering over at the digital clock on the truck’s dashboard, “—five minutes until you have to be inside. Think I can make you cum between now and then?”
You scoff, pushing him away and laughing at his crudeness.
“You’re insane,” you giggle, shooting him a faux-stern glare. “Behave.”
“Fine,” he grumbles, frowning childishly. You just grin, slipping your hand around his neck and pulling him in for a doting kiss. You press a series of rapid pecks along the seam of his mouth, nipping playfully at his bottom lip before retreating. Instinctively, he follows you, but you dig your fingers into his shoulder, stopping him before he can get too far.
“Goodnight,” you whisper, reaching for the handle on the door.
Harry watches with wide, awestruck eyes as you exit the car. You clutch your purse closer to your side, looking back at him expectantly and waiting for his response.
He clears his throat, blinking out of his reverie.
“Yeah,” he nods, nostrils flaring slightly. “Goodnight.”
He peels away from your house only once you disappear through the front door. Subconsciously, his hand finds the rose-gold chain hanging around his throat. He fiddles with the necklace, running his thumb over the smooth surface of your shiny pendant. There’s something unreal—almost dreamlike—about having it between his fingers. He’s spent so long watching you fumble and toy with it—watching it bring you comfort when you’re nervous, or bored, or afraid.
Now, it’s his.
And so are you.
Faint music plays from the truck’s stereo; Harry reaches forward, twisting a knob and turning the volume up to its full capacity. Ariana Grande’s familiar vocal riffs pour through the speakers.
He sings along at the top of his lungs, hollering triumphantly the entire ride home.
~*~
Extra: Knockout [READ IT NOW ON PATREON]
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notnctu · 4 years
Text
cupid’s arrow - h.rj | 7 days
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━ sweet greetings from the 7 days fluff series 
genre ❥ slight angst, fluff !!  details ❥ college!au, friends to lovers!au, genderneutral!reader ━ where renjun makes a bet to get you to fall in love with him.  warnings ❥ explicit language, light banter word count ❥ 7.1k  synopsis ❥ The silly boy has no idea what he’s gotten himself into when he makes a bet with his arrogant friend to get you to fall in love with him. Renjun never intends to confess, mainly because his past unrequited loves have demolished his confidence. So a low stakes gamble causes him a great deal of stress and pride, wishing that it was as easy as striking you with Cupid’s Arrow. While he wants your feelings to develop organically, he actually doesn’t know what he’d do if you did end up liking him back. Because to him, you have always been someone unattainable and out of his reach  taglist ❥ @yourmagnanimousholiness​ ; @lovelycharm05​ ; @watermelonxes​ ; @jaehyunsjasmine​ ; @mjlkau​​ <3
a/n ❥ this is author doie ❀!! uhh this came out a little more angsty than i had planned it to be.. anyways its been a long time coming and we’re still working on the requests hehehe uhh keep an eye out for some blog updates bc we are starting school soon :) thanks for sticking with us so far! lots of love for everyone<3
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Huang Renjun catches a glimpse of your enchanting figure across the lecture hall and how you effortlessly slide into your usual seat near the front. The tap against the tiny turnout table with your pen, ruffling your hair to only have it fall back in place beautifully, and aura alone suffocates him.
In a three hundred person lecture, all he sees is you. The only person in the room who has his undivided attention and while it might be entirely infatuation by your attractiveness, the mutual friends you two share describe you having a heart of gold.
A heart that is impenetrable. Strong, sturdy, shining metal that no one has been able to get through, but Renjun thinks that it’s because you can tell someone is undeserving. Keen and observant eyes, it’s a good thing that his stares don’t linger for long.
As he walks down the descending steps to sit in the row behind you, he remembers a very drunk night over the past weekend and an idiotic bet that has him punching himself. He wishes that he never agreed, but the liquid pride in him could not bite his tongue.
“(Y/N)?” His friend scorns and Renjun slaps his forehead at the slip of your name. Truthfully, the alcohol is messing with his head and he’s saying things that are no longer in his control. But how could he have possibly let the one secret he holds to himself out into the small crowd.
He mumbles profanities underneath his breath, trying to limit light from hurting his blurry vision, and rubbing his throbbing temples. “Yes, (Y/N).” There is no confidence in his voice at the whisper of your name.
“Dude, (Y/N) is way out of your league.” The headache just doesn’t have an end. He knows this; there is no way you’d ever bat an eyelash at him first. Renjun just likes things that are impossible to him, a poor habit of his.
“I bet I could get (Y/N) to get with me first before you ever can.” Then, Renjun’s eyes shoot open wide and the view of the arrogance laughing in the dimness slowly boils his blood.
Renjun may seem like the weaker link to pick on, but he is not one to give up a fight. While his friend has an advantage, the last thing Renjun would want is for you to fall for a horrendous two faced personality.
He’ll charm your pants off and when he gets what he wants: the victory and your vulnerability, he’ll hurt you. Would you be able to see past his fake genuineness or actually fall for the person he plays so well? Renjun can’t let anyone hurt you if he can prevent it.
“I bet that I can get (Y/N) to fall in love with me.” Renjun stumbles to stand up proudly, making himself bolder and more intimidating. Nevertheless, the drowsiness intoxicates him and he can barely keep his line of vision focused.
He sees the disgusting smirk on his friend’s face and a hand extends out for Renjun to shake. “Okay. Let’s bet on it. If you can’t get (Y/N) to fall in love with you, they’ll be mine and you can’t speak to them ever again.”
“Nice use of claiming someone who barely knows you exist.” The alcohol didn’t take away Renjun’s sharp sarcasm and the constant rolling of his eyes.
Renjun truly has no confidence at the game he decided to engage in, his only motive is to protect you from a bad guy. He wouldn’t even know how to handle the potential chance that you could like him back, did you have the ability to do so?
He never had the intention to confess to you, his heart has been broken all too much already by unrequited loves from his past. And if he had to be honest with himself, his admiration for you has become so strong that even he’s afraid to be someone to taint it.
What are the odds that the entire row behind you is already filled? Renjun’s throat closes when he sees the empty seat right next to you and the professor starting up his presentation. Other students push past him to hurry into empty seats before lecture begins, and his own feet pick him up toward you.
Like a magnetic pull, you attract him with an inexplicable force so naturally. Clearing his throat, he swallows the anxiousness that blocks him from speaking. 
“Is this seat taken?”
This is it. This is the first of many looks you two will share, and Renjun’s heart pounds at his chest to wait for your eyes to meet his own for more than a second.
As if the room falls silent and everything is in slow motion, Renjun captures the very image when you blink up at him with beautiful dazzling gentleness and the utter sugar of your lips curling upwards. And he’s stunned, hoping it doesn’t show on his face.
“No.” It’s a simple reply and nothing worth jumping out of joy about, but he tries so hard to hold back the growing smile of your acknowledgement. You are being polite, but something inside of him feels giddy and like static running through his veins.
“Thanks.” Dropping his bag, he enters the seat carefully and sits with his hands folded together on the tiny table.
You examine the attentive boy, as his focus is trained on the lecture slides and the unprepared professor messing with his mic. Chuckling, “you don’t take notes?”
Renjun is surprised at your sudden interaction, completely blindsided by your friendliness. He wasn’t sure how well that would have worked, but your curiosity speaks for you. “I actually forgot my laptop today.” The heavy device sits in his bag at his feet, but he doesn’t dare take it out after the lie.
The soft ‘oh’ that falls from your mouth is too cute and Renjun clears his throat to bring him back from his daydreams of you. Looking apologetic, he shrugs and pretends to gear his attention back to the professor, who finally starts the long awaited class.
“I can send you my notes for the day, if you’d like.” The kindness in your voice does not go unnoticed, in fact, it causes Renjun to hold onto it for a little longer to fuel his undying crush for you.
“I’d love that—” Perhaps he shouldn’t have used the word love for the strictly friendly gesture. “—you’re a lifesaver. Uh, how should I refer to you as?” Playing dumb is his only way to get to you, for now.
“(Y/N). And you?” You hand your phone toward him with social media popped up to input his user handle.
Renjun introduces himself as his sweaty fingers type, and he wonders if he should have polished up any photos that may have you steering away from him. However when he returns your device, the smile that lights up your face allows him to breathe easily.
“I knew you sounded familiar. You’re friends with Jaemin, right?” Your whisper grows soft as you multitask to make conversation and jot down a few important bullet points from the slides. Renjun tries hard to dissect the information as well, but the boring tone of his professor is nothing compared to his crush finally having conversation with him.
“We’re housemates along with two other people.” His body is able to relax now that he’s broken the wall of introductions. You carry yourself to be more intimidating than you actually are.
When he peeks back over at your concentrated expression, your lip is hidden by your top row of teeth and your quick eyes dart between the monitor and your page. How are you so good at literally everything?
“A small world.” He picks up your every word, “well Renjun, since this class has basically ruined my life, would it be too much to ask if you’re down to study with me?” And despite the fluorescent lights being absolutely dull, they still dust your eyes with an enticing glitter.
He must have been staring for too long because you start your sentence of doubt, but Renjun stammers over his response. The professor isn’t quite happy with the small overlap of chatter and shoots a glare at the two of you.
That’s definitely not a good way to start, but it’s memorable. Renjun motions for your pen, and scribbles in his own font the answer to your offer:
I’d love that :)
Then, his heart soars back into the clouds once again at the grin that settles and your written response:  
Me too <3
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How does one get someone to fall for them? If Renjun knew, he wouldn’t still be single and infatuated with someone too good for him. He wishes that it’s as simple as the myths make it out to be, where all Cupid had to do was draw his bow and launch a loving arrow that pierces through the heart — an instant love.
But playing Cupid himself is harder than anticipated. He has no handy tools to assist him with his goals. He just has himself, lacks luster and is invisible. Can he be more painfully boring?
And he looks at you with literal hearts in his eyes. An excitement that awaits him, the true meaning of a head turner. That is you. And all he can offer is his mere presence.
“So how did you and Jaemin meet?” Looking up from your blinding laptop screen, Renjun feels the light tap underneath the table from your foot. He chuckles at the subtly adorable affection, and your own way of showing it.
This has to be the third round of study sessions you two shared, and bit by bit, he falls more and more for you despite it needing to be the other way around. The captivating get-to-know you conversation of favorites all down to your aspirations and goals.
The intelligence of you, your wisdom, your perspective. While he did not have this insight before, knowing it now only makes you more alluring. He can’t believe you’re even sitting with him in his shared living room, just the two of you.
“We met at orientation. He’s persistent.” Renjun laughs lightly and you smile in return, nodding along with his statement.
“Wish I met you guys at orientation. I was never the one to reach out to people first until college forced me out of my shell.” He hopes his ears didn’t deceive him, but Renjun had to do a double take: you said you guys, which includes him, right? You wish you had met him earlier?
But the latter shocks him a bit. If he recalls your first meeting, you were the one curious enough to continue speaking to him. “I would have never guessed.”
“Really?” There is a notable light in your eyes as you tilt your head. “I don’t seem shy?”
“Not at all…” He has to stop himself from going on an incredible tangent about how greatly outspoken you are, it gives away too much on how observant he’s been.  
“I’m good at hiding it then.” You examine the soft shade of pink on the tips of his ears and his averting shy gazes. “What are you good at hiding?”
Your question leaves him speechless and gripping at any ends of answers. There are a number of ways he can go about it, but the truth is not one of them.
What is he good at hiding? His unconditional affection for you. He’s good at concealing every heavy heart beat at your smallest actions. He’s good at keeping a regretful secret bet.
But as those options pop into his head, he doesn’t want to say any of them. So, he opts for a white lie instead and hopes that the hesitation doesn’t sell him out for being a nervous wreck.
“I’m good at hiding what I fear.” You blink at him, clearly intrigued to want to know more.
“You do seem pretty fearless, Huang Renjun.” There is a brief exchange of eye contact and Renjun swears that his pounding heart can be heard in the silence. A smirk on your lips as you return to your work, he’s warm inside from the usage of his full name. And you don’t even realize the effect you have over him.
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“So, you and (Y/N) are close. How did that start?” Jaemin jumps onto Renjun’s neatly made bed. The covers are now ruffled and tossed from the impact.
Jaemin isn’t home very often, but in the rare times he has been, it’s always during the study sessions with you. The first time you came over, Jaemin tried not to talk up a storm from seeing a familiar face. He respects Renjun’s relationships, so he tried his best to keep from prying at the boy.
“You finally want to know?” Renjun scoffs lightheartedly, punching his housemate lightly on the shoulder as he swivels around in his chair. With an excited wide smile, Jaemin tugs at his friend’s arm as an endearing sign of persistence. “Okay, okay. We have the same class.”
“(Y/N) really approached you in a three hundred student lecture?” A tone of disbelief settles in Jaemin’s rhetorical question. He cocks an eyebrow, waiting for Renjun to tell some truth.
“Not exactly. I sat next to them and a conversation just happened.” Renjun shrugs as if it’s nothing big, as if it hadn’t been for your curiosity that started this blossoming relationship.
“Spare me the details.” Jaemin sits up to hold Renjun by his shoulders. The pressure feels oddly crushing, like a whole weight dropping on him. Jaemin stares him dead in the eyes. “What are your motives, Huang Renjun?”
His mouth hangs slightly open from the question. “I can’t be friends with (Y/N)?” Almost defensively, Renjun furrows his eyebrows at his friend, but he can tell Jaemin has caught onto his lie.
“I heard that you made a bet with a certain shithead.” Jaemin rolls his eyes at remembering their horrible mutual, a crime to even consider him as a friend. He drops his heavy hands from Renjun’s shoulders and falls back onto the mattress.  
The alarming expression of grave danger, Renjun is screwed. He gulps the gathered saliva in the back of his mouth, searching for a plausible explanation. “I was drunk.” He slaps his forehead at the stupid reasoning as Jaemin shoots upright to begin scolding him.
“Let me explain,” Renjun covers his mouth to halt Jaemin’s excessive nagging. “I like (Y/N), that’s how the bet even came alive. I slipped up and then he was saying all this stuff about (Y/N) being out of my league.”
“Which is true.” Jaemin adds, quite muffled but doesn’t slip past Renjun.
Renjun glares and thanks him sarcastically. “I made the bet to protect (Y/N) from him. He was provoking me by saying that he can get (Y/N) first and since I was heavily intoxicated, I didn’t think before I spoke.”
Jaemin holds Renjun warmly, seeing that his friend needed a hug from the saddened memory. It’s all too obvious how regretful Renjun feels. “So I’m trying my best at carrying the bet because there’s too much at stake.”
A chill runs down his spine remembering the consequences. He just can’t fail. Jaemin pulls away and lightly pats Renjun’s hair. “Cupid has made you into a fool for your crush.”
“He’s made me into a bigger one for thinking I could get my crush to like me back.” Renjun sighs in defeat and groans loudly. Why does this frustrate him so much? Perhaps it’s the lack of ability to actually get someone to like him back.
Renjun has been single for his entire life, not by choice. He’s done the movie cliches of a confession: a bouquet of roses, a poster, a night under the stars. And not one has ever accepted his feelings. He doesn’t blame any of them since he still struggles with finding things to love about himself. What is there to love about him? He can’t seem to find any redeeming qualities worth mentioning.
But you. You, alone, is simply worth an honorable mention. And now that it’s been well over a month of your friendship, he can confirm that you’re everything he’s ever wanted and more.
“Why don’t you start by being (Y/N)’s friend first? Love doesn’t just happen in an instant, no offense to Cupid or anything. I mean.. isn’t it all just a myth anyways?” Jaemin picks Renjun’s falling chin and he can see the glossy eyes of sadness. They swim with frustration and guilt.
Like an epiphany, Jaemin gave Renjun a starting place. For weeks, Renjun racked his brain for an easy solution out of it all. In reality, he didn’t need any wicked form of magic for foul play. He just wants to be by your side for as long as you allow. And a part of him is scared for you to like him back.
You’ve always been too out of his reach. Standing on a pedestal, you’re something unattainable. It’s lucky that you even bat an eyelash at him. He’s admired you all too much, Renjun won’t actually know what to do if you ever did like him back.
This all stems from his inner insecurities, like a recurring thought: what is there to like about him? Or is he even good enough for you?
If someone had warned him that love could become this confusing, he would’ve sacrificed his heart for something less complicated. To feel. To love. Renjun wishes he can remove the love bow that pierced through his chest.
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On a random Friday night, Renjun’s phone rings with an unexpected caller ID. He pauses the song he’s been listening to for the past hour to pick up.
“Renjun! I’m sad and drunk right now.” Your voice is incredibly slurred and he can barely hear you with the loud background noise. “Can you come pick me up?”
“Are you over on Third Ave. again?” He despises that place. A house on the corner of Third Avenue right off the interstate from campus that throws weekly parties. These parties are overcrowded with creeps and cheap booze. Unfortunately, you’re favorite place to run away to.
This isn’t his first time coming to get you. Over the past few months of your established friendship, you’ve sent him numerous amounts of drunk texts calling for him. This is the first time you actually called, preluding to a really rough night you’ve been having.
You sigh into the receiver, “you remembered.” like you’re on the verge of tears, he can hear the quiver in your tiny voice.
“I have your location, idiot.” Renjun smiles at your silly drunk reactions, finding you more enduring from the innocence. “I’ll be there in a blink.”
“Okay, I’ll close my eyes so I can open them to you.” You giggle before hanging up and Renjun can’t keep the widest grin off of his face. He’s rushing out his door, not wanting to wait another second to see you.
One thing Renjun realized after finally growing close enough to you is that through all his infatuation, you’re still a human. While he thinks of you in a sparkling cascading glitter waterfall, you’re made of the same softness that Renjun has. You’re not perfect and he needed to stop idolizing you as if you’re some shiny trophy.
No, he’s learned that he needed to love you for who you truly are. And the moment he broke down your layers, the glass tears that fell from your cheeks were real. The pain through your confident façade, Renjun needed to love you at your lowest.
He saw you for you, not the attractive person from his lecture he drooled months over. You are the exact reality that movies are afraid to portray. You’re courageous, chic, charming. But you’re also shy, soft spoken, and silly. You’re like waking up during dawn and marveling in the silence of a sleeping society. You’re also like smiles on a sunny day and living in the moment.
Renjun is lovestruck, wildly in love with all that you are. The only thing that brings down his spirits is the lingering bet he made several months ago and he hates how it’s always gnawing at him. It’s like an echo, bouncing off the walls of his mind. He can’t shake it off. Most of the time, he tries to focus the moment in front of him, but it has him tossing and turning in the middle of the night.
Without much surprise, you stand in front of the overflowing party house with eyes cutely squeezed shut. A friend by your side to wait with you. “Open your eyes.” Renjun yells as windows roll down and he double parks the car.
Your eyes gleam in the darkness and bidding your friend a quick goodbye, you jump into the familiar vehicle and embrace your good friend with a longing hug. Renjun chuckles at your adorable actions, patting your shoulder lightly. Despite the cheerful welcome, the mood immediately shifts when he hears your tiny sniffs and feels the tears on his shirt.
“C’mon, your favorite ice cream flavor is waiting for you at my place.” As he whispers positive affirmations, you can only cry harder into his chest. “You’re not feeling too good tonight, are you?”
It’s way too obvious of a question to ask, he knows. Truthfully, he didn’t know what to say and comforting is not his strongest skill without it turning it into a life lesson. He knows what you need, just someone to acknowledge how you’re feeling and to listen.
“I’m feeling the worst tonight. I don’t want to talk about it. Maybe later?” You pull away from his arms, even if he isn’t ready to let you go. He helps buckle your seatbelt and wipe any remaining wetness on your cheeks.
Your hand briefly touches Renjun’s which causes the boy to freeze at the sudden action. Your hazy smile is unclear, but you lean into him before he can process all the randomness. A kiss on his cheek, the most delicate feeling of lips on skin.
Renjun explodes inside, like hazardous fireworks on a cloudy night. He wants to enjoy it, but his circumstances make it difficult for him to. “Thanks for coming to get me.” Your body slumps back onto the seat, a pout on your lower lip. Renjun shifts awkwardly in his seat, buckling his seatbelt to begin the ride home. He can’t find the words to say.
You’re being too casual about what had just happened, as if you’re ignoring it all. Or you simply have no control over anything that you’re doing. “Let me tell you a secret, Injunie.” The sugarcoated nickname. You’re definitely too drunk at the moment, and whatever you do now will be long forgotten the next morning.
Renjun still doesn’t say anything, relishing in the kiss on the cheek just seconds ago. His fingers lightly touch his face, grazing upon the very part your lips came in contact with. He’s truly through the moon and— “I used to have the biggest crush on Jaemin.” Renjun abruptly steps on the brakes, whipping the both of you in your seats.
His heart is falling, it’s plummeting and he can’t do anything to save it. “I really didn’t expect such a surprised reaction.”
Renjun clears his throat. “I’m just caught off guard.” Not a lie, he really wasn’t expecting a confession and his heart to break right at this moment. “Why Jaemin?”
He knows why Jaemin. He’s a social butterfly with no caution to the wind and a heart made of pure kindness. A welcoming friendly figure that won’t hesitate to feed into someone’s need for words of affirmation. Not to mention, Jaemin has a good few inches above him and looks of a poster kpop idol. Of course, you liked Jaemin.
“He has such a good heart. I guess I just like guys who think of me first, as selfish as that sounds. I don’t prioritize myself, so it would be nice if someone else did.” You fiddle your thumbs and Renjun is impatiently tapping his fingers against the wheel.
The red traffic light before you enacts two different feelings. Renjun wants this ride to end as fast as possible. You want this ride to last forever.
“But, Jaemin is seeing someone.”
Your head ducks down and out the window at the shining streetlamps; you know very well about Jaemin’s love life. “I didn’t expect anything from him. I just liked him for him. He came to pick me up every time I would ask, I guess I have a thing for guys who do that.”
Renjun tightens his grip, heart pounding at your statement. You peer up to look at your friend in the lack of light. His glasses sit low on his nose bridge, a soft cotton shirt hugs his torso, and pajama pants that clad his legs. A mess bed of hair as the cherry on top.
After Jaemin, you swore to yourself that you wouldn’t fall for anyone so easily. All of that was thrown out the window the very first night Renjun came to your saving. Despite contrary belief, your heart is not as impenetrable as people make you out to be. And as tough as you can be, it was too hard not to be the slightest interested in him.
Ever since your first meeting, Renjun has always been cool and collected. He’s a hothead at his best, but too playful for any serious damage. Renjun reminds you of yourself. Like a huge impenetrable wall built against any trouble to enter, he is as guarded as you are. He’s timid, and while you had tried your best to hide your own, Renjun simply embraces that part of him.
Renjun stayed after every tearful night. He’s helped you through every difficult study guide, if anything he saved your failing grade.
Renjun puts you first throughout anything; asking if you want the booth seat at restaurants, strategically walking on the outer side so you can avoid driving cars, always has your favorite snacks without you asking. Every tiny gesture, may you be slightly delusional, seemed as if he loved you. And if he did, you wouldn’t mind one bit because you wanted to love him back.
“What about you? We’ve never really talked about our love lives before.” You speak up in the silence, Rejun being awfully quiet tonight. He hopes you don’t blame him, but everything has been too overwhelming. He is no longer sure on what he wants to do or how to react.
“My love life is too sad to talk about.” He’s never wanted to talk about it with you, in case he’d slip up and say something too revealing. “It’s a long list of unrequited loves. I’ve given up on professing my feelings to someone at this point.”
“What would have to happen to get you to confess?” Your eyes coin a mischievous twinkle.
Renjun feels his palms grow sweaty, a bit nervous with this conversation topic. 
“Something catastrophic.”
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Something catastrophic did end up happening. Renjun wishes he could disappear, or if he runs away, would anyone notice?
He stands behind your fuming stance. In any other given situation, Renjun would be more than flattered that you’re standing up for him. However in this case, you’re making a fool out of yourself on his behalf.
“Oh, so you haven’t told (Y/N) about the bet?” Of all the nights Renjun decides to accompany you on a Friday evening, he runs until the one person he never wanted to come within ten feet to.
Truthfully, the night was going well. He ran into a few of his other acquaintances from his club, others from his classes. You held onto his arm the moment you two entered the party, afraid to lose this precious boy in the dense crowd. People walked by and expressed how cute you two looked together.
You poured him drinks that will make his head throb and you busted dance moves that made his heart throb. You were the epitome of a fun time, like an explosion of positive endorphins. Your toothy smiles. Your bright electrified eyes. Your sweet laughter. This was the last beautiful image he had of you before everything came falling apart.
“What bet?” You quickly turn around to face Renjun. His hand scratches the back of his neck and his gaze stays staring at his own feet. Your throat grows tight from Renjun’s hesitation.
“He made a bet with me that he could get you to fall in love with him.” Please stop talking, Renjun begs in his thoughts. He tightens his fist, unable to form words to speak. The thumping of the loud music makes it hard to focus.
“He—” Shaky voice and stuttering… even you are having doubts of Renjun’s character. “He wouldn’t do that.” Your eyes bounce between him and Renjun.
“I hate to be the one to break it to you, but you don't know him very well then.” Renjun’s arrogant friend crosses his arms coolly, a smug smirk unfolding on his face.
“It’s true, (Y/N). I did make the bet and I regret it every waking day.” Renjun finally speaks up, but you’re out the door before he can continue.
There isn’t another thought in his head when he’s running after you; you’re already so far down the road. The secret was bound to be revealed, but he wasn’t ready for it. He was never going to be ready for this day because his first mistake was making the bet to begin with.
He should have thought about you. He should have just swallowed his pride and talked his friend out of it. Was that a choice? Could he have just done that instead of letting it fester into such a problem?
Out of breath and out of mind, Renjun calls out your name. When you spin on your heels to walk toward him, his heart reaches for you. However, you push at his chest and he almost falls backwards.
You’re angry, more than angry. You’re upset. You have every right to be. “What were you thinking, Renjun?” There is a small crack in your voice and he can see your tear stained cheeks under the moonlight. “Am I even your friend? All this time… you had an agenda. Were your actions all fake, then? You wanted to manipulate me into falling in love with you?”
Your words are hitting like large bricks. You are questioning the past five months of your friendship and everything Renjun has ever done for you. A false reality, Renjun didn’t actually give a damn about you. He wanted to prove some odd male status. Could you be any more blind?
“Please let me explain… I was drunk out of my mind that night and the bet I made was stupid. It was before proper evaluation. Does it make it okay? No, I understand that.” Renjun speaks with his hands, clearly panicked and frazzled by the way they waved around in the air. “The bet… I did it to protect you from that guy. I didn’t want him to hurt you.”
“So you hurt me instead?” If someone were to listen closely, they would be able to hear the shattering of two hearts tonight. On this late evening, two hearts are broken under the moon and stars.
But it’s pitiful because the arrow that struck Renjun remains intact. He still loves you, which is why it pains him so much to where he can’t breathe. The information in his head is scattered, like an alarm blaring through his empty brain.
All he knows is that he loves you. You are the one thing he’s afraid of losing. From the first words you two exchanged, his fear that he hid all too well is and always will be losing you.
“That was not my intention ever. I never wanted to hurt you.” Renjun takes a step closer, but you take one back.
“Well you did because your little bet… it worked. I love you, Renjun, so congratulations.” There is bitterness and an inexplicable amount of heartbreak that lace your venomous confession.
All of his life, he thought that if one person liked him back, he’d be the happiest person in the world. Possibly confused at how to proceed with the information, but definitely glad that someone could see any redeeming characteristics in him.
But he feels all the opposite. Your confession keeps his heart broken. If anything, it puzzles him more. “How..? Why would you ever like me?” There were no tricks, no attempts at flirtation, nothing out of bounds of being your friend. He just had himself. And if anyone in the universe were to like him, he’d never expect it would be you.
You groan, growing more infuriated at Renjun. “Because you’re everything I wish I could be. You’re level-headed and insightful. You’re calm and cool, without any necessary arrogance. The way you make me feel… I feel important to you, at least, I thought I was.” Your voice continues to drop softer and softer, “how could I not like you?”
The butterflies could not come at a better time. Hearing you compliment him when he found it difficult to look past his own self deprecation, he’s beyond any levels of shock. Nevertheless, he feels apologetic and knew that this is all too good to be true.
“I’m sorry, (Y/N), for making that terrible bet. But, I need you to know one thing: our friendship was genuine. All I’ve ever wanted these past months is to make sure your sweet smile stays resting on your beautiful face.”
“Why? You didn’t know me! You used me for some … pride gamble. I was nothing to you the day you made that bet.” You shout harsh words at him, and Renjun can’t hold back any longer.
This is what he meant by something catastrophic. When he’s pushed to the edge of a cliff, all his buttons are pressed aggressively. Everything falling apart. The loose ends coming undone all too quickly to grapple. He never wanted it to come to this.
“That-That’s not true! I loved you long before that regretful night! You mean every single moment of happiness to me. You’re every ray of sunshine that kisses my skin, every blue sky that reminds me of good days. You mean everything to me.” Genuine words pour from his lips, hoping that you’ll understand what’s left of his heart.
“You’re confessing?” You gasp, practically dazed at the amount of metaphors he compared you to. “Something catastrophic.” A small moment of recollection and a mumble under your breath, you’re understanding what he meant by the phrase he used several nights ago.
“Yes because I can't lose you. I’m a mess of feelings at the moment, but I just know that I’m scared to wake up to days without you in them.” Renjun pleads, the night air causing goosebumps to rise on his arms. His eyes are full of melancholy and fear as he waits for your response.
And you want to forgive him, but would that mean your heart is being too easy? You feel lingering pain, but your eyes reflect Renjun. “To think I thought you were pretty fearless.” Scoffing, you roll your eyes at him and are completely unsure what to do next.
Nevertheless, you’ve wanted someone like Renjun at some point in your life. You hoped for better days and those didn’t start happening until you two met. Renjun went from being your distant study partner to being your number one person to call. He’s wiped more tears than any boy has.
The difference between Renjun and Jaemin is while Jaemin is known to have an extravagantly warm presence, Renjun’s is hidden underneath all the quietness. Like a breakthrough, getting through Renjun felt like getting through to yourself. You needed him to aid in your own self love.
All you’ve ever wanted is to be seen and Renjun saw you.
“I forgive you.” Renjun can finally breathe and rest his tense muscles. But when he reaches for your hand, you take it away. “But it doesn’t mean we are okay. I’ll approach you when I’m ready.”
It’s not easy to love as it’s not easy to pretend that everything can go back to normal after being hurt. You need him to understand that, would he wait for you? The many others before didn’t.
“Okay.” That is all he can say, in the midst of a defeat, he still wishes that you’d stay by his side. But he wrestles that desire with transparency and having organic feelings. Nonetheless, he values the latter. If you did really somehow manage to love him, you’ll come back when you’re ready. He knows. He understands. He sees you through and through.
And he watches you disappear back into the house to find a friend to drive you home. He loves you, but love can also be consequential.
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It’s already midway into the school semester and not that Renjun is counting or anything, but it’s been practically a whole month since the night at the party. He’s done nothing, except sigh in despair and reminisce about the memories before they were ruined.
While Jaemin’s efforts to console him are much appreciated, it doesn’t do much for the fact that you haven’t acknowledged Renjun’s existence for a whole thirty days.
And although he’ll wait a lifetime for you, the question of when he should move on ponders his clouded thoughts. His intensively agonizing desire of wanting to be by your side has dwindled down now. Renjun just wants to see you happy.
“Hey Cupid,” It’s a newly despised nickname coined by the one and only person who knows how to push at Renjun’s buttons — Lee Haechan. Haechan knocks obnoxiously at his door and does not wait around to hear an answer, “get your sad face out here.”
“Go away, Haechan. I’m not in the mood.” As Renjun mindlessly skims over his calendar for important dates, he is pained by the reminder of your upcoming birthday. You had marked it yourself a while back and specifically told Renjun that his attendance is entirely mandatory.
Times have changed now, right? You’ve been radio silent for weeks and as much as he hates to say this to himself: you probably don’t remember making such an assertion. Why would you? You’re most likely not thinking about him anymore anyways and maybe that’s for the better.
“Hey! Lovestruck Asshole, I’m not going to tell you again. Get that arrow out of your ass and come outside now.” Just the demand alone in Haechan’s voice irritates Renjun enough to where he’s storming to open his door.
But what it reveals is not the smirk of his annoying housemate, instead, it is the image of the very first time Renjun ever laid eyes on you and the moment Cupid’s Arrow struck right through his heart. It’s a rush of nostalgia that surges through his veins.
You sit with a hand underneath your chin and elbow pressing into a flat surface for support. The dazed stare of daydream as you’re unaware of your surroundings, yet still waiting for something exciting to catch your attention. And just how lovely you look in the softest rose colored shirt and how your lips, still barely glistening from a quick swipe of your tongue, are slightly agape into an expressionless rest.
All before your eyes trail to the distraction of another body entering the room and for a brief second, make eye contact with Renjun as he’s all the more astonished by your grace. Then like a scene that’s imprinted in his head too clearly, your gaze drops back down to the floor and you’re back to your inner thoughts.
As if the pierced arrow in his heart is triggered, Renjun rediscovers the feelings of a newfound infatuation — a crush. Though baseless except in regards to physical attraction, he’s nonetheless amazed by how quickly you take his breath away… again.
Unlike the first memory, you actually speak to him as you’re now familiar with the starry eyed boy. “It’s been a while.”
The color in your voice that he’s missed hearing is pure music. He clears his throat as if he’s afraid of his own vocal chords breaking from nervousness.
“H-Hey, yeah. It’s been a while.” Renjun repeats dumbfounded that you’re even sitting in his shared living room.
“How have you been?” There you are being polite, but the giddiness still runs like static through his veins at being asked about his well being.
“Lost.” He blurts out the first word that comes to mind. Perhaps, he should stop using words with such heavy implications to friendly gestures. Your head immediately pops up and he scrambles to correct himself. “I mean I’ve been distracted lately.”
“Sadness really does take its course.” You tread lightly, testing the waters with a small grin. The atmosphere is oddly comforting, like feeling you can’t quite replace.
Renjun looks rather rough around the edges, but you don’t blame him since you did show up unannounced. However, the glint in his eyes is much of a delight to see. The way his small mouth curves into the tiniest smile and the gentleness in his regular cadence remind you of past long days full of laughter. The best part of them all — you spent them together.
“My birthday is coming up soon.” Jumping straight to the point of your visit, you stand up to approach him. “I plan to host a small party… and I remember saying a while back that your attendance is mandatory.”
Renjun catches his breath in his throat and he could run gleeful laps around the room if it isn’t for the poorly spaced complex. “So are you still down, Huang Renjun?”
“I’d love that.” He smiles greatly at your offer and as simple as that, your arms wrap around his torso into a long awaited embrace.
“Me too.” You mumble into his shirt and take a deep breath of his lavender scented detergent, “I’m ready. I’m ready to have you in my life. I’m ready to laugh with you. I’m ready to lay in your company. I’m ready to give you my heart.”
As you finish your last sentence, his arms wrap around you too and pull you into a tighter hold. “You have always had mine.”
Renjun can finally remove the arrow that unforgivingly stayed stuck in his heart for the longest time. Your reciprocated love fills up the hole that is left behind. He can now love you with a full and whole heart.
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leighistired · 3 years
Text
Out Loud
A Martin character study AO3 Link
“G’night mum, love you.”
“Make sure you put the trash out, don’t want it stinking up the house.”
At 12 it occurs to Martin, he can’t recall the last time his mother said “I love you” to him. She must have. He knows she loves him, so why can’t he remember her saying it? Was it before dad left? It can’t have been that long ago. He knows if he brings it up she’ll just tell him off for being silly so he just decides to not say it unless she says it first. She doesn’t say it.
“Look how nice our neighbor’s garden is,” she says instead. “If only we could have such a nice garden.”
“The neighbors hire a man-” Martin tries to explain. He had just done law maintenance over the weekend; he would have to bring up memory issues next time they saw a doctor.
“Aren’t you happy with how I provide for you?” She snaps. “Ever since your lousy father left us I have done my best even with my health and all you can talk about is getting a bloody gardener.”
“Sorry, mum,” he says. It’s better not to argue when she gets like this.
“Forget it. Just get me my tea.”
He goes and brews her a cup of Oolong tea. It’s far too bitter for his tastes but it’s all he buys when he does the shopping. Perhaps that was it, instead of saying she loved him she just provided for him.
Martin tells himself that until she gets too sick to work and begins needling him to get a job at 14. Suddenly he’s providing for her on top of school and everything else but that didn’t mean she didn’t love him. She was just sick and the medication she was on made her tired most of the time so it wasn’t like he could expect her to be excited to see him; especially not when he’s the one bringing it to her.
“Is soup the only thing you buy?” She asks one evening when he brings her dinner.
“You didn’t have soup last night,” he reminds her patiently after a long day of school and work.
“Oh, so you think I’m ungrateful? I am your mother! I gave birth to you! You should be happy to take care of me!”
“It would be nice if you acted like a mum for once!” Martin snaps back. He regrets it as soon as he says it and doesn’t wait to hear her response. He leaves the house and sits in the park near his house for a long time and cries. Of course she loves him. It must be so hard on her to be stuck at home all day with no one to talk to and there he went snapping at her. She’s asleep by the time he comes home and neither of them mentions it in the morning.
Martin doesn’t know what he expects when he starts to transition. He hadn’t even called it a transition at first, he just likes how he looks with short hair, baggy clothes, and a sports bra. His mother disagrees. There are days she won’t even look at him and when she does it’s usually even worse.
“You cut your hair again,” she mentions one morning over breakfast. “Just when you were starting to look like a girl.”
“Yup,” Martin replies tight-lipped. He had been thinking it over for a while and he’s slowly coming to terms with the fact that he isn’t a girl. The way she says it hits him sharply. If she was never going to say “I love you” to a daughter, why would she say it to a son? He doesn’t bother coming out to her properly because he can already see the disgust on her face when he gets a proper binder.
When she decides to move into a full-time care facility, it’s almost a relief. He feels foolish for expecting her to say it when she leaves. He feels even more foolish when he says it in goodbye. The receptionist gives him a sympathetic look when she doesn’t say it back but the receptionist probably assumes his mother has memory issues and forgot who he was. She doesn’t. Still, he appreciates the gesture.
Dating is nearly impossible for most of his life. It’s easiest to blame his busy schedule; he doesn’t even have time for friends outside of school. The fact that no one even asks him out isn’t something he wants to think about. After he drops out of school and his mother leaves, dating and friendship don’t get any easier. He can’t let anyone he works with get close enough or they’ll find out his real age and utter lack of qualifications. Online dating is also out of the question for similar reasons. If one of his coworkers saw him with the age 19 in his profile they would either know he wasn’t actually 25 or they would think he was a creep and he didn’t exactly feel comfortable lying about his age to potential dates. Meeting people organically isn’t the worst thing in the world but it’s difficult. He makes a few passing friends at a local trans support group but even then, he can’t get close to anyone without risking someone discovering his falsified CV.
He doesn’t have his first real boyfriend until he’s 23 years old. They meet at a Holloween party thrown by a mutual acquaintance and date for almost five months before Martin ruins it.
“Happy Valentine’s Day, Dominick, I love you,” Martin says as he serves dinner.
“Oh, uh, it’s a little fast to say that, don’t you think?” Dominick had stammered awkwardly. Was it? It didn’t seem like it to Martin and even if it was, it was true. He loved Dominick.
“I-I don’t think so,” Martin replies nervously. Some distant part of himself starts to berate him for being so needy.
“It kind of is. Let’s just pretend you never said it and we’ll see how we feel in a few more months, ok?”
“You mean we’ll see how you feel,” Martin says a little bitterly.
“Why can’t you just relax and enjoy the holiday?”
Martin had sighed in resignation and picked at the rest of his plate. They broke up a week later because Dominick felt like they were “looking for different things.”
Martin doesn’t have another serious boyfriend after that. He goes on a few more dates over the years but nothing that lasts longer than five months. Nothing that lasts long enough to say “I love you.” In some deep dark part of him, he wonders if he was ever meant for love. His father hadn’t loved him enough to stay, his mother hadn’t said she loved him in over a decade, and he’s not even sure he was in love with Dominick. He gets crushes, sure, but he just throws himself into his work at the Magnus Institute instead.
Working in the library isn’t bad. He gets along with his coworkers well enough but he can never get close to them. Not close enough to love them as friends or be loved in return.
Then he gets transferred to the Archives.
Jonathan Sims is not the first asshole boss Martin has ever had. He doesn’t understand why Mr. Bouchard sent him down to work in the Archive in the first place and his first impression with his new boss is less than stellar when a dog follows him into the building. It doesn’t help that Jon is good-looking and every once in a while Martin catches glimpses of a version of the Archivist without a stick up his ass. Like when he spends Martin’s ice cream birthday talking about emulsifiers. If only he would be clearer about what he actually wants from Martin. No report or follow-up seems to be good enough, even with the help of Tim and Sasha.
Martin works hard for Jon’s approval. He doesn’t know why he wants the recognition but it’s either this or quit and he really, really can’t quit. So he spends three full days looking for every woman named Angela over fifty in Bexley only to be berated for actually talking to one of them and then he offers to look into a case about spiders that clearly upsets Jon only to get trapped in his flat by a zombie worm woman.
When he finally escapes, he takes a few worm corpses with him and he dumps them on Jon’s desk while he’s in the middle of a statement. Let Jon try and disprove that When he gives his own statement he makes special emphasis on reminding Jon how hard he worked to meet his exacting standards. He refuses to be yelled at for this.
Except Jon believes him. More than believes him, in fact. He offers Martin a place to stay. Of course that would be enough to ignite a crush in Martin.
As soon as they get to document storage Martin sits on the cot and begins to cry with exhaustion. He expects Jon to leave but again he surprises him.
“I-it’s alright, Martin,” he says awkwardly as he pats Martin’s shoulder. “You’ll be safe here and I’m certain Elias will respond promptly to my request for extra security.”
“Thanks,” Martin sniffs. He can’t remember the last time he cried in front of another person.
“Would...would you like me to stay until you fall asleep? If- if you think it will help.”
“Oh, er...no...I’ll be fine, thank you. You should be getting home, anyway. It’s Saturday, Jon.”
Martin blacks out as soon as Jon shuts the door to document storage. When he wakes up he finds his crush on Jon stubbornly still in place.
He can’t help himself after that. He starts taking special care of Jon in hopes of encouraging the kind man he saw that night into emerging. At the very least Jon doesn’t yell at him as much and he even thanks Martin for the tea he brings. It’s then that he notices other things about Jon, like how rattled he gets by certain statements and how he’ll often go an entire day without eating or drinking anything unless someone brings him something. That someone being Martin. He also notices how late Jon leaves, if he leaves at all.
It’s on one such night of Jon still being in his office at 11 o’clock that Martin knocks on Jon’s office door.
“Jon?” He calls gently.
“Hzzmt! Martin?” Jon responds, having been startled awake from dozing at his desk. “You should be asleep.”
“And you should be home.”
“I see your point,” Jon sighs. “I’ll finish up here and head home. Unless you need something?”
“Actually….I-I was thinking,” Martin beings. “Since I sort of kicked you off your cot...D’you want to come back to document storage with me? You know, get some sleep?”
“What?”
“Er...forget I-”
“The cot would be rather cramped with both of us,” Jon warns as he gets up from his desk. “If...if you’re sure you want me to join you.”
“Yeah...I thought you had work to do?”
“It can wait until morning, no use keeping you up longer than necessary.”
Martin only half regrets offering to share a bed with his crush. Jon was right, the only way to fit both of them on the cot is for both of them to sleep on their sides (or for Jon to sleep on top of Martin but even the thought has his face burning) and it’s difficult for him to fall asleep with Jon’s back pressed against his. It’s good to hear Jon fall asleep, though, and as time wears on it’s easier for Martin to goad Jon away from work to sleep a few hours.
The more of himself Jon reveals the harder Martin falls for him. Especially after Jon accuses him of being a ghost during the Prentiss attack. Even with the guilt Martin feels every time he looks at Jon mummified in bandages. That was Martin’s fault. If he had just paid more attention then he wouldn’t have lost Jon and Tim in the tunnels. He does everything he can to try and make up for it; despite Jon becoming more and more closed off by the day. Intellectually, Martin knows that Jon has gotten like that with everyone, but something deep down makes Martin feel like it’s his fault Jon’s gotten so cold. It doesn’t help that Jon seems to have gotten friendly with the policewoman investigating the murder of the previous Archivist. Tim even seems to think they’re having an affair which does wonders for Martin’s self-esteem. Jon wouldn’t be the first straight man Martin has ever had a crush on but Martin was pretty sure Jon wasn’t straight. Again, he wonders if he’s done something wrong to push Jon away.
After Jon stumbles out of his office covered in blood claiming to have had an accident with a bread knife Martin finds all the excuse he needs to regularly drag Jon to the canteen to make sure he eats something. The silences during those lunches are hard. They had eaten together before but now Jon wasn’t talking to him. The most Martin could get out of him were a few one-word answers. He tries not to think about how it reminds him of his mum.
“So,” he tries for the millionth time while Jon picks at his sandwich. “Did I tell you what happened while you were at physical therapy the other day?”
Jon doesn’t say anything but he looks up with a gaze that bores into Martin.
“Uh...A little girl came in alone with a statement, she must’ve only been eight years old,” Martin says. Jon looks at him with an expression that almost seems afraid. “Don’t worry, it recorded fine on digital. She walked right down into the Archive, walked up to my desk, and said ‘Excuse me. My name is Beatrice Walker and I’d like to make a statement about a supernatural occurrence.’ She sounded so grown up and she refused to leave until I had recorded her statement. Turns out her dad was using the library for research and she had just wandered off.”
“What was her statement about?” Jon asks to Martin’s surprise.
“Oh, a hamster with mysteriously changing spots.”
“Ah,” Jon replies thoughtfully. “Not much need for follow-up there, I suppose.”
“Not unless you really need me to track down the shop where her parents picked up the new hamster.”
He catches the briefest of smirks from Jon before the conversation dies again.
After that Jon’s coldness and paranoia comes out in the form of a screaming accusation over letters Jon found in the trash. Martin barely manages to make it to the bathroom before he bursts into tears after coming clean about his CV. Tim thankfully doesn’t check on him while he silently curses his taste in men. Jon doesn’t meet his eye for the next week in what he bitterly hopes is guilt. He does seem slightly more willing to talk with Martin at lunch, though.
Then Jon goes missing. After trying to get Martin and Tim to go home early because Jon was feeling under the weather; he disappears. Not before apparently bludgeoning someone with a pipe and isn’t that exactly what he and Tim need to see as soon as they get back from a two-week kidnapping by a spooky door monster?
With Sasha gone, Jon missing, and Melanie King being suddenly hired by Elias, whatever’s left of Martin’s relationship with Tim deteriorates. More so when Martin becomes the only one in the world to believe Jon could be innocent. It’s probably that that makes the police detective “investigating” Jon so actively hostile toward him. Apparently, people say he and Jon are “close” and that probably only means the lunch thing but he wants to imagine it’s something more. Like people are somehow picking up that Jon likes him back.
When Jon comes back to confront Elias it’s all Martin can think to do to fall back on his tea-making. He ducks into Jon’s office with a piping cup of the overly sweet tea he spent months perfecting to Jon’s taste and finds him with his face buried in his one non-bandaged hand.
“Jon?” He calls as gently as he can while he closes the door behind him. “I brought you some tea.”
It’s when Jon looks up that Martin notices the bloody mess down the front of his shirt.
“You’re hurt. Let me go get the first aid-”
“No!” Jon interrupts frantically. “Just...Could you just stay with me for a moment?”
Martin acquiesces and they sit side by side on the sofa in Jon’s office in silence until Jon starts sniffling into his tea. He offers Jon a hug and Jon all but dives into his chest to cry. It’s the saddest most broken thing Martin has ever heard and it’s all he can do not to pull Jon into his lap and curl around him protectively.
“Martin...I-I...I’m sorry,” he says quietly. “For everything. For Sasha and Prentiss and...and for the way I treated you. You didn’t….no one deserves that.”
“None of that was your fault and I sort of deserved it. I didn’t actually know what I was doing.”
“You didn’t deserve it,” Jon insists before going back to quietly crying into Martin’s jumper. Martin doesn’t respond. He can’t recall the last time someone’s apologized to him. At least not like that. He’d been told off most of his life for not doing things up to people’s standards. A few people over the years had told him he didn’t deserve it but Jon was the first person to apologize. No wonder Martin was falling in love with him.
Damn it.
Cuddling doesn’t become a regular occurrence for them by any means but Jon begins doing more to seek Martin out after that. They eat lunch together more often and Martin stays up late to talk to Jon while he’s abroad. It drives home how deeply buried into Martin’s heart Jon has become. Especially after he comes back after going missing for a month and has the audacity to joke about being moisturized by a clown mannequin for a month.
He wonders if Jon feels the same way. Sometimes Jon will smile shyly at him, and he can almost believe that Jon would be interested in a relationship if the world wasn’t ending. The last time they speak before the Unknowing they’re in document storage.
“Are you ready?” Jon asks as he shifts nervously.
“As ready as I’ll ever be,” Martin signs. He heard what happened to Melanie. He knows what’s likely to happen to him. Some small part of him is screaming to just tell Jon his feelings like it’s the climax of an action movie.
“Stay safe,” Jon says.
“Come back,” Martin replies. Jon offers him a hug. It’s no movie kiss but it allows Martin to hold Jon as close as possible. Jon himself is hanging off of Martin’s neck and it feels like a final goodbye.
Then Elias confirms what Martin has always suspected deep down. That his mother never loved him or if there was a time when she did, she stopped when his father left. Even after everything. After he spent years taking care of her. After he had to quit school to care for her. All she ever saw was his father. All his transition did was to remind her further of how much he looked like his father’s son. At least it was worth it. To distract Elias so Melanie could find evidence to arrest him.
Then Peter Lukas shows up and reveals that Elias planned to get arrested. Worse than that, he offers Martin a promotion of sorts.
Then they get the news from Yarmouth. Tim’s body is found in a charred heap, Daisy is missing, and Jon is dead in all but brain activity. At least Basira is physically alive.
Martin spends as much time as he can next to Jon. He’s used to loving someone who can’t love him back. Maybe this is all he’s destined for. Love unrequited. He talks to Jon’s dreaming corpse. Tells him about his day, reads him poetry, even a statement, but nothing draws Jon out of his coma.
Then his mother dies. He barely has the emotional strength to mourn her. Instead, he scatters her ashes and mourns his childhood lost to trying impossibly to earn her love.
After the Flesh attacks, Martin makes a decision. He’ll join Lukas. It’ll probably lead to his death but what did that matter? His mother was gone and didn’t care about him anyway. Tim and Sasha were gone. Jon was basically gone. Basira and Melanie were the only people left that he vaguely cared about and by doing this he could at least protect them.
He visits Jon one last time in the hospital. He’s still covered in wires and his eyes still flit around violently behind his lids as Martin sits down next to him and takes his hand.
“Hey Jon,” he says quietly. “I...This is the last time I’m going to see you...Probably ever. I know, I know old dramatic Martin surely he’s exaggerating. I’m not. The Institute is in danger and...I have a way to keep Melanie and Basira a little safer, so I’m doing it. I just came by one last time to say...Jon, I...I love you. Goodbye.”
He gets up and presses a kiss on a part of Jon’s forehead not covered in wires before leaving. It’s alright that he doesn’t say it back. No one ever says it back to Martin.
When Jon wakes up everything becomes that much harder. Suddenly he had a reason to live and the way Jon pursues him makes him almost believe...No, even completing the thought would be dangerous for all of them. Jon trusts him enough not to be constantly badgering and that makes it worse. When Jon is there the Lonely makes Martin resent his presence and when Jon’s gone Martin resents his absence.
The final, most excruciating pain is when Jon comes after him in the Lonely. He’s excepted his fate in the chilling numbness of the Lonely. Maybe that’s why he says it. The certain, inevitable rejection would be numbed utterly. So he says it.
“I really loved you, you know?”
And Jon looks broken. Even after he rips Peter’s statement from him. Even when he reaches for Martin’s face with hands that seem far too warm and makes him See. Knowing Jon loves him isn’t like “knowing” his mother loves him. Instead of a lie born in Martin’s mind to stamp down the fear of rejection, it’s a reality pouring from Jon’s mind mingled with Jon’s fears of rejection.
Jon’s hands still feel too warm compared to the icy chill of the Lonely as he leads Martin out. Still, he refuses to let go all the way through the tunnels, the Institute, talking to Basira, packing at each other’s flats, and on to the train. The way to Daisy’s safe house feels like a blur and when they finally arrive it’s all Martin can do to remember to take off his binder before collapsing into bed with Jon’s warm arms around him.
He wakes to Jon’s quiet crying. The awful, stifled thing that breaks Martin’s heart.
“Jon,” he whispers.
“Martin? Did I wake you? I’m sorry, I’ll-”
“It’s alright, Jon,” he assures as he swaps their positions so Jon is tucked firmly against him. Jon makes another broken noise and Martin can’t stop himself from crying, too.
“I-I’m here, Martin. You aren’t on your own,” Jon soothes and Martin almost has to laugh. They lay crying and comforting each other until they both fall back asleep.
When they wake up properly they take stock of the safe house’s pantry and make a list of things to pick up in the village after breakfast. Martin gives in to the temptation to buy a new notebook to try and write poetry in. They have enough canned food to survive to the next ice age so they pick up perishable items like milk, bread, butter, and eggs. Jon also picks up fresh peaches and a box of Martin’s preferred tea. It’s easy to pretend like they going on a normal shopping trip as they walk up and down the aisles to check things off their list.
They return to the cabin and settle in. Martin sits on the sofa and tries to write out a poem while Jon tries to read a book from Daisy’s personal collection. After a while, Martin beings to feel Jon’s gaze on him.
“Is there something on my face?” He tries casually as he’s met with an expression he’s never been on the receiving end of.
“I was just thinking about how much I love you,” Jon sighs. Martin can’t stop the noise that comes out of him. All his life trying to earn love and Jon just says it while Martin’s thinking of a synonym for ‘yellow.’
“I-I don’t expect you to reciprocate,” Jon says quickly, his soft expression suddenly turning worried.
“But I do.”
“Oh…Oh!”
“Yeah.”
Jon starts giggling and it’s impossible for Martin not to follow suit until happy tears stream down both of their faces.
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ready-to-obeyme · 4 years
Text
[OM!] College!AU Zoom University Headcanons
For the 7 Demon Brothers + Solomon
Scenario: Headcanons about how you interact with the demon brothers online during online lectures via Zoom (an online video platform that universities have been using to teach classes) and their habits using it
Notes: gn!MC, Considering most universities (including mine) are all online AGAIN fall quarter and we’re going to be using Zoom forever……. i kinda wish i DID have online classes with the demon boys (and Solomon) 
--
Lucifer
Video off, mic off, no profile pic just the typical first and last name, so you don’t really talk to him but you do see his name pop up in the Zoom chat to ask clarification questions
Accidentally has his mic on sometimes
First time you interact with him is when you private message him “hey, I think your mic is still on” because everyone can hear his brothers arguing in the background
The mic is soon turned off and you get a response back “thanks. Sorry you had to hear all of that”
“Yeah no prob. How many brothers do you have anyways?”
“Too many.” 
Thus starts your relationship with him as zoom buddies, asking each other privately what the professor just said and some clarification questions
If you’re shy about asking stuff, he has no problems asking for you; never makes you feel dumb about your questions
first time you hear his voice during midterm season when the professor doesn’t see your messages (“you’d expect them to know how this all works by now” he messages you dryly) and he asks his question out loud before the professor can move on
(lowkey think he’s hot just from his voice) 
Then highkey finds out he’s hot when his video is accidentally on for a few seconds when he’s distracted with Asmo or Mammon in the background 
Bonus points if you tease him about it 
Shows up at office hours when the TA is late and you just talk to him, exchange emails and numbers ;) y’know for homework help
If you’re going to do group projects, he seeks you out first-- god forbid he’s stuck with someone who doesn’t do the work ONLINE
Mammon
Mic is ALWAYS accidentally on until the professor mutes him or tells him to mute himself 
“Oh, sorry prof!!! My b!!”
Private messages you on purpose to ask a clarification question because he doesn’t want to seem dumb asking it to everyone or to the professor
You wonder why he chose you but then you realize it’s because you had asked a question yourself earlier in the lecture or answered a question 
It becomes a recurring thing-- like EVERY lecture
If you’re not annoyed at him, then you might suggest that the two of you share a document for notes or tease him about just having you teach the lecture if he’s confused
“Actually, that sounds great!” he types to you before you could say jk “that’d help me a lot, thanks!!”
Smh why did you sign up for more work for yourself but oh well, he seems like a nice guy
Is also a very attractive guy, you realize, when you schedule a zoom meeting with him and actually see his face
Realizes why he keeps asking questions is because he plays card games on a split screen instead of paying attention to lecture (same tho)
Invites you to join him by private messaging you a link to join (and you do eventually when lectures gets boring)
Sometimes sends the invite link to the whole class by accident 
He admits he wouldn’t even attend lecture and would just watch the recording but you’re always there so he goes 
Which means you suppose you should keep going to lecture if anything to have him go as well 
Leviathan
Already the master of online classes tbh and has no problem with the format
Finds it kind of annoying when there’s technical difficulties, but he just quickly switches to a tab to watch anime 
Probably is just watching anime on another tab if the lecture gets boring or slow anyways
He’s always the first one to answer forum/discussion posts because he’s just very tech-savvy and good at replying to people
First interaction is probably him answering one of your questions on the discussion question and from then on after you start messaging him privately during lecture when you have a question you think he can help with
A little hesitant on helping you, but you’re also just really nice to him so he’s okay with helping you, I guess 
Give him your email? Why? So he can send you the book pdfs and previous practice tests of course, why else?? 
O-Oh, you want to add him on social media? Just to ask for homework questions right? Okay, yeah, sure! o////o 
If video is on, you see the reflection of anime in one of his mirrors and casually ask him which episode he’s on
Has never been so shook or attentive in his LIFE 
Satan
He is a godsend during every breakout room because he ACTUALLY TALKS instead of leaving you in a quiet room alone with three other strangers
You think you’re lowkey in love with him when he has no problems volunteering to present to the professor and putting his thoughts into words so eloquently
He also appreciate you talking during discussion too, and enjoys the conversations the two of you have while you’re not even sure the other blank profile pics are even there anymore 
He’s the one to suggest making a shared doc to share notes and study together-- the man is productive and efficient about this, what can I say?
Manages to convince you to go to office hours with him and meet up for studying hours and ooooh he’s hot 
He’s actually a very good study buddy, especially when he’s teaching you something you’re confused about, but also just good to study together with (when you’re not too busy staring at him) 
The only reason why you’re focused during class because he’d look disappointed at you if you weren’t-- that’s on you for caring about what he thinks, but he’s just so PUT TOGETHER how do you NOT look up to him?
Finds out that he’s actually just a mess like everyone else when his brothers come in during one of your study session and he says “excuse me,” mutes the mic and goes off screen; you can see some shadows in the back as satan shoves his brothers out of the room and manhandles them till they leave
Is kind of embarrassed he forgot to turn of video too but you just think it’s funny because you relate to the lack of privacy of online classes (and perhaps annoying siblings)
Asmodeus
How the hell does he look awake and lively at a 9am lecture class????
Is that make up??? Is he… wearing PANTS??? (you don’t remember the last time you put on actual pants)
The most functional-looking person in the entire zoom lecture, asides from the professor 
Has video on all the time-- because honestly why wouldn’t he? He actually looks good
Definitely not paying attention most of the time, and you see it on his face 
Messages you first when you actually wear something nice for once because you’re going to go to the supermarket afterwards
“Ooh, where’d you get that accessory??”
The two of you end up not paying attention AT ALL and instead just gush about each other’s outfits
Definitely is not afraid to ask for your social media so you can follow each other and ask for homework help I guess but MAINLY to talk to each other because online classes can get sooooo tedious 
Really really wants to be able to meet you in person someday when it’s safe (“we’d look so cute together!!!”) but settles for facetime or zoom meet-ups 
Really does not hesitate to make friends and make the best out of social situations despite remote format bless him 
The only time he doesn’t turn on video is after a night of drinking with his brothers (“it was mammon’s birthday” he types into the chat with you, “ugh i’m probably going to go lie down, let me know how lecture goes”)
Beelzebub
Always eating-- even if this wasn’t online, he’d also be the one to bring snacks-- his whole LUNCH to class to eat so this isn’t too surprising 
You think it’s hilarious when he actually brings his laptop or phone (whatever he’s using zoom with) to the kitchen and literally makes dinner during the lecture
Sometimes you watch his tiny video of him putting stuff into the oven than the lecture slides and you bet your entire class is doing that too 
Sometimes you ask him jokingly what he’s cooking and you’re surprised when he pauses and answers your question mid-dinner making
“Lasagna. You want some?” 
“Yeah send it over through mail bro”
You don’t actually know if he’s actually retaining any lecture information, but apparently he’s doing decent enough-- still, if you offer to share your notes, he’d be so grateful
“Where do you live?”
“Ldfjalskjd why are you going to send me food?” 
“Yeah. What’s your address? I’ll send you a box of cookies or something.” 
Basically he just does NOT care what the entire class sees him doing; he could be cooking, eating, working out-- he’s listening to the lecture out loud but he’s giving you a show (whether it’s a cooking show or a work out video depends on the time of day)
Belphegor
If the lectures are recorded, you’ll never see him, especially if the class is early in the morning LOL
If you do see him during lecture and video is on, he’s always in his pajamas or sleep clothes, a pillow in front of him 
During discussion, if video is required, he probably has a screenshot of himself awake as a profile picture so he can snooze away pretending like he’s actually there 
You definitely notice because he’s the first video to show up in your gallery and his video is like never moving HAHA
You finally message him when the TA splits you all into breakout rooms when you’re all supposed to be finding the answer or discussing something to be shared later
Kind of awkward at first because he’s like… asleep, but when he wakes up blearily, he does participate-- if only for your sake and for discussion points 
“Hey… wake me up if the TA or professor asks us any questions, will ya?” he says as he puts his head down and sleeps 
Since you and him are now officially breakout room buddies, you message him when you have a question and know that he’ll probably respond to you by the end of class because he actually knows the material despite sleeping through half of the class
Is actually very appreciative of you that you volunteer to speak on behalf of your breakout room if no one else does because that means HE doesn’t have to do it
Bonus:
Solomon
The one to make the groupchat/slack link and send it to everyone in the class so we could actually help each other in the class
Shares a link to a google folder with resources
Highkey more useful than a TA sometimes 
Super helpful, efficient, and charismatic… but suspiciously so
Like where did he get all these pdfs? Where did he get all these 100% test from previous years? And-- is that an answer key??? To what???
Video isn’t on ever, so you have no clue what he looks like… until you’re in the same discussion as him and he turns on his video for breakout rooms
He always, ALWAYS sits at the island in the kitchen and sips coffee whenever you have discussion with him 
Responds back to you almost immediately if you ask him questions during lecture (because honestly, why not-- he seems smart and has his life together) but if anyone messages him in the groupchat, surprisingly takes a while to reply… maybe he’s busy?
Anyhow you’re not gonna question it; you’re gonna pass this class and Solomon is carrying everyone to an A+
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burnedbyshoto · 4 years
Text
a brush of luck
Tumblr media
— In a world where soulmates exist you can communicate yours with a brush of a pen. It just doesn’t help that you are a certified idiot with a skill in misplacing things. —
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pairing: todoroki shouto x reader
warnings: fluff, angst, soulmate!au, cursing
word count: 4,229
a/n: this is for the bnaharem collab and I was super horrible and was not ready and i just woke up and threw this together please dont hate me uhuhuhuhhh see the masterlist here!!!
message to join my tag list!
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“Hey, y/l/n, you forget this!”
Your hair was falling into your face, your face flustered, and your binders filled with paper seemed to be liquid as they slowly fell to the ground.
Kaminari stood behind you when you turned around. His lips were picked into a kind smile. It was a teasing one too by the small glint in his eyes while he held onto your backpack and phone. A look of self-realized stupidity washed over your face when your head threw back into a groan. How stupid were you, really?
“I’m so sorry!” you exclaimed, throwing your things onto the nearest desk. You felt the tips of your ears burn with embarrassment when Kaminari helped you slip on your backpack and pocketed your phone in the jacket pocket. “I swear I’m the most forgetful person in the world.”
“Well, you do really clinch the title of the person who would forget their head if it wasn’t on their shoulders.”
Snorting, you shoved him with your shoulder, and he helped you regather your things with a low groan.
“Let’s see the tattoo,” you grin, ready to head out once again. Groaning loudly, Kaminari didn’t seem to want to give in to your demand, but still, with a twitch of his eye and a shove of his sleeve, he showed off his arm. “You know what, I’m going to say it—”
“I’m going to say it, I don’t care that you broke your elbows,” Kaminari finishes the phrase with you with a snort.
“Do you think it’s the first thing out of their mouth or matching tattoo?” you asked curiously when you blond best friend also prepped to leave the classroom for the day. 
“I hope its the first thing out of their mouth, imagine how fucking ultra sexy foxy hot that would be,” Kaminari moaned, his eyes rolling to the back of his eyes at the thought. Gagging at the visual horniness of that thought, you walked away, grinning at the way that Kaminari stumbled over his feet to catch up with you.
This was the world you lived in, the world of soulmates.
You weren’t sure when they had first started, but you know that it wasn’t always a phenomenon that was around. When you roamed the internet looking at old, old stories on soulmates, these theories, these worlds were built on one single concept.
They wrote about a world of black and white for everyone until that fateful moment, or matching tattoos for everyone. But no, this world was much more complicated, much more detailed. Yes, in the world there were a lot of theories that ended up being true, but the thing they didn’t see coming was that every couple — every polyamorous relationship consisted of a unique theme.
Kaminari’s soulmate was linked with tattoo’s, and the purpose behind said symbol was unknown, unheard of until he met them. Yours, as you could guess and know, was also different. Pressing your fingers against the pen that sat on the inside pocket of your uniform jacket, you smiled when Kaminari’s arm was thrown around you.
“At least you’ve never lost or forgotten that pen of yours, that would be dangerous!”
“I promise I will never ever forget it.”
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You sat on your bed nearing midnight. You were cocooned into your blankets flipping through your Hero Lawbook that you were supposed to have read months ago, but now finally was. Humming to yourself, you read through the apparent laws and the not so evident laws.
For instance, there is a law that Pro Heroes are not allowed to eat off the edge of buildings anymore! American transfer students had littered so much it became a law!
Snorting to yourself, you flipped the page.
But something warm pressed into your forearm, the most heated energy that sent shivers down your spine. It was comforting as it was ethereal. The second your body recognized the feeling, the Hero Lawbook went soaring across the room, and you grabbed your pen that was waiting at your side for ages now. 
Hi, sorry I’m just able to get back to you. I had a bunch of homework and friends who just let me leave them.
Smiling to yourself, you twirled the pen in your fingers and scribbled down your response:
It’s all good, I’ve been studying this entire time too, was just bored and didn’t respond to you earlier today!
Your soulmate theme was straightforward and quite comprehensive — it was dubbed the Forearm and Pen theme (you hated that theme). You could communicate with your soulmate by writing with the pen on your arm, but it only worked with that pen, nothing else.
The year you were to turn sixteen, you received a pen from literally out of the blue. You remember celebrating New Year with your class in your first year at U.A.; it had been an enjoyable night! Everything in life was still going fantastic, and your class was finally past the excellent friend’s point and felt like a genuine family. You remember hugging and telling everyone good night, still being fifteen at that point, and stumbling back to your room exhausted.
When you had gotten back to your room, you didn’t even undress; simply tugging off your pants and removing your bra, you threw yourself onto the bed. But you had landed on something stiff and painful, groaning your hands shuffled for whatever it was that you fell on, and when you grabbed it, you froze at the sight of the white box. 
Was this a gift?
Your entire life, you had always wondered if you did have a soulmate, most people you knew after all had soulmate markers that appeared since birth. But you were perfectly normal. You saw all colors; you had no shared pain; there was no tattoo, no mind link, no dream meetings.
Nothing.
You were normal.
Sighing, you opened the box, hoping that it was from someone you at the very least respected.
Inside was a silver pen.
You blinked your eyes rapidly, unsure of what you were looking at, there were no initials, no engraving, nothing. 
It was an exquisite pen, and despite what you thought, it was very, very light. Frowning, your fingers pushed down on the pen, but there was nothing that came out, was there no ink?
Shrugging, you dragged it against your arm feeling the way that the cool tip delicately massaged your arm. It felt nice.
“Holy shit!”
Your eyes saw the pretty grey silvery ink on your forearm. It stood out against your skin, the ink appearing nowhere else but your arm, and then it hit you.
This was for your soulmate!
With excitement tearing through you, your exhaustion no longer bitting on your skull, but the overwhelming need to know that this was for your soulmate shook you awake. Twirling the pen in your fingers, you couldn’t help but start writing.
OMG HI
You sat there staring at your forearm, unsure as to what to do next. What do you do next?
Hey?
If your heart could be anywhere but your chest, you were nearly positive it existed within your throat at this very moment. This was nervewracking, holy shit.
Sorry, you don’t know me, but I’m ___ ___.
You frowned when you tried to write your name, it was stopping you.
It seems that we do have some rules to this entire thing.
They responded back to you, and as if they could hear you, you groaned loudly.
This soulmate shit was already stopping your excitement, it seemed.
From that very first night, the two of you were able to discover a few things. First off, anything too personal was not allowed to be written out. So names, location, and gender were the biggest ones. Birthdays were not, and you were quick to find out that both of you were still fifteen. Second of all, just because you couldn’t figure out where exactly you both were located, you did manage to put together that you were both in Japan. Third of all, your soulmate was a Hero in Training just like you and was a male. Last, of all, you were quick to realize that you were in love with the way your body felt like it was gently warming up whenever he messaged you.
I think I deserve a round of applause.
You grinned after writing your sentence, your eyes watching while the warmth filled your body and his writing slowly appearing on your forearm.
Did you not forget anything today? I find that hard to believe.
You had to suppress a scream.
WELL, IT HAPPENED! I GOT EVERYTHING I NEEDED TO BRING BACK TO MY ROOM WITH ME!!
Weren’t you the one who forgot to bring your entire backpack to school the other day?
NO! I said I almost did, but my bestie got it for me!
How do you forget everything? I think you should try to make a list to make sure that you always have things you need for the day.
... I do… but I always lose the list, and im always running late…
You’re the worst…
Congrats bbg, I’m your soulmate
The world really doesn’t want to bless me with a good life, it seems…
HEY, THAT’S MEAN!
The two of you banter for what seems like hours, the night sky fading from blackness to the deep blue of the sky right before the sunrise. You had spent the entire night curled into your pillow, your face shoved into the soft fabric to suppress your chortling snorts because you geniunely enjoyed interacting with your soulmate. But it was late, and you both had classes early that next morning.
Okay, asshole, I need to sleep! I got this stupid test tomorrow that I did not study for. I'll write to ya tomorrow!! Goodnight!!!
Don’t be rude to your soulmate :( but goodnight, and good luck on that test, sorry for keeping you up.
Smiling at his words, you put the pen to your forearm one last time.
I will never ever accept your apology for making me stay up, I love talking with you, goodnight soulmate, sweet dreams.
You placed the pen down, your eyes fluttering close, heavy with sleep. But still, no exhaustion could suppress the fluttering warmth in your body when words appeared on your arm. 
Sweet dreams, soulmate.
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“Fuck, sorry,” you groaned when you sleepily slammed into the person standing in front of you. 
Blinking tiredness away from your eyes — poorly at that too — you focused up at Shouto. Grinning, you waved at your classmate, who looked almost as exhausted as you felt and definitely looked.
“It’s okay,” he nodded at you stepping to the side so that the two of you could walk side to side.
“You ready for that test today?” you asked after moments of silence.
You and Todoroki Shouto were not as close as you would like to be. Since day one, you had always had a thing for the duality of a man, and while it was mostly superficial feelings derived from the fact that he was attractive above anything else, it still made you awkward around him. At the time, your feelings were still holding you down, you always fully believed that you had no soulmate, so you thought maybe you could sweep him off his feet. It was rumored that his scar covered up his own soulmate mark, so there was no way for him to know who his soulmate was.
Selfishly and embarrassingly, you hoped that you could have him.
Then you met your soulmate, and things changed.
But now you and your classmates were all eighteen and held the world in your hands, yet you couldn’t speak to him usually still.
“There’s no test today?” Shouto stilled, his eyes narrowing in confusion, and your eyes screwed too.
“Isn’t it… Friday? We have a Hero Law test?”
“Y/l/n,” Shouto snorted a grin spreading across his features, “It’s Wednesday.”
If there was a god, he would shoot you right now.
Your cheeks burned with embarrassment while you walked faster to the classroom, Shouto keeping up with your pace easily, he was taller than you after all.
“Shut up,” you warned, your gaze not reaching Shouto’s who was staring at you.
“I wasn’t speaking.”
“I could hear you thinking!”
Shouto put on a smirk, his eyes teasing you, and his mouth dropping to speak, but there was a loud interruption.
“Y/L/N-CHAAAANNNNNN!!!!”
Both of you turned to see Kaminari chasing after you, his arms waving, looking out of breath.
“YOU FORGOT YOUR JACKET AND TIE!”
Shouto chuckled beside you, and you stared down to see that you were, in fact, only wearing half of your uniform. If there’s a god, he will end you now, you thought.
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
You're not serious right now, are you?
Going on three years of knowing your soulmate, or at the very least talking with him, you thought you had a good understanding of who he was. He was strong, powerful, and kind. He came off a bit standoffish at times but was the dumbest person you’ve ever known. Common sense was not his friend, and that was okay. 
Even at times when the two of you had your differing opinions because it did happen, it never snowballed more into a small annoyance that the two of you would apologize for and move on. But this was something that shouldn’t have had become a fight, it shouldn’t have been anything more potent than a difference of opinion, but when you suggested entertaining the thought of when the two of you would finally meet, he was uncharacteristically cold. 
Hurt by his tone, you told him, and he said you to grow up until it became this written fight.
Why couldn’t you talk about meeting?
Why didn’t he want to think about what would happen when the two of you would meet?
It was getting ugly for no reason, a fight just to fight, and it was making you nauseous.
But he crossed a line that couldn’t be fixed when he wrote a simple sentence:
Just because you’re my soulmate doesn’t mean I have to love you, meet you, or marry you.
So there you sat, your bottom lip trembling with tears streaking down your blotchy face. He wasn’t being serious, was he? There was no way… no fucking way this was him. The warmth that flooded your body with his new message felt ice-cold, poisoning you from the inside out while you read it.
You're my soulmate, but I have no obligation to do anything with you now or ever. The world chose you for me, not me. I didn’t choose you. I don’t owe you anything here. Soulmates are bullshit and don’t fucking bother messaging me again if you expect me to fall in love with you just because our “souls are connected”
It was needless to say that you didn’t respond back, not because you felt like he should love you because of your connected souls, but because your sobbing and broken emotions left you curled into a ball, ready for a sleepless slumber to take you.
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
“You don’t look too hot,” Kaminari told you, hitting you with his foot when your bleary and puffy eyes stared at your best friend.
Kirishima and Mina, who were sitting beside him, elbowed him at the same time, berating him for his insensitive comment. You could feel Sero and Bakugou staring at you, their eyes concerned and curious. 
“What’s eating ya up?” Sero asked, and you found a rock-forming in your throat when you shrugged.
“Soulmate problems…”
“That was fucking obvious,” Bakugou rolled his eyes, taking a drink of his water. “Tell us the problem, not a stupid summary.”
Surprisingly that’s all it took for you to come undone, and you explained what happened with tears falling down your face and a sniffling nose. There was a lot to tell them about it, and you showed them the pen while explaining the entire story. They listened to every word you uttered, faces concern but taking in everything you said.
“You’re an idiot,” Bakugou spoke the second you were finished, his eye twitching while he glared at you. You swallowed thickly, placing the pen on the table while Bakugou edged closer towards you. “He’s not wrong, you know, stupid fucking soulmates are just this irrational solution to an irrational problem. Love is much more complex than that, and you don’t seem to have been fighting for him in that way either, sure you seem like good friends, but that doesn’t give you the right to expect him to love you. But he was a complete fucking dick about it, so I say kill him.”
Your — and all of the rest of your friend group — eyes widened at his words. With nothing to follow him up, you all continued to stare at him while he munched on his food.
“WHAT ARE YOU FUCKING EXTRAS LOOKING AT!”
“Is Bakugou a love expert?” Mina’s stage whispered to the group.
“He almost was, but then he said to kill y/n’s soulmate, so probably not anymore,” Kirishima responded back.
“SHUT THE HELL UP BEFORE I KILL YOU!”
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
It took four days before the warm feeling shot through your body again.
Fuck, I'm really sorry, I was a complete fucking dick. I said a lot of things, and i didn’t mean to say I was angry and upset, and I know that you're upset, rightfully upset, but i don’t want to lose you.
No matter how long it took for him to get back to you, your heart squeezed with euphoria and poison, your hands moving to grab your pen in your pocket.
It wasn’t there.
Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no. Oh no.
You tore apart your room, trying to find the silver pen but you couldn’t find it.
Stay as mad as you want, I just… please talk with me soon, even if it takes five days. I'm sorry, soulmate.
Frustrated tears poured down your face, nausea almost making you wheeze when you stared at the words you wanted to reply to.
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
One day after he apologized:
Don’t want to bother you, just wanted to apologize again and say that I miss you, talk to you soon.
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
Five days after he apologized:
I’m not really sure if this is normal or not… I'm not really… educated when it comes to romance and shit like that, especially when it comes to someone being upset with the other… my female classmates told me that I should expect a response from you soon. I'm really sorry, please write soon.
⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆⋄⋆⊹⋄⋆
So it seems that i’ve fucked up to the point of no return. I'm sorry, I miss you, I love you. Maybe one day I can reconvince you that I'm your soulmate for a good reason, but I guess I’ll have to work on that.
It had been fourteen days since he had apologized, and you sat in your room with tears streaming down your face. You wanted to respond back, but even fourteen days of tirelessly searching U.A.’s entire campus, ripping it stone by stone, there was no finding your pen. Every day without fail, he gave you an update of his day and another apology. Every day they got more hopeless, more pained.
This was his last message for a while, he needed time to work things out with himself now, the strain of this and graduation coming soon being too much to handle at the moment. 
Wiping your tears for what felt like the hundredth time within this past twenty minutes, you stood up on your wobbly legs to go downstairs for water. You were dehydrated and absolutely needed to get out for both fresh air and water.
Walking down the stairwell with swollen eyes, you groaned when you slammed into a body when you opened the door to the common area. 
Shouto blinked down at you, and you felt your throat clampdown at the pained look in his own eyes.
“Have you been—”
“Are you—”
You both spoke over each other, and despite the horrid feeling coursing through your bones, you cracked a smile.
“I’m getting water,” you explained with a shrug. “Long night ya know, just needed to replenish my system so I can cry some more.”
Shouto stared at you, and with horror, you realized precisely what you had said.
“Oh my god, ignore me!” you squeak, covering your face trying to move past him, but Shouto seemed to be curious now and followed after you.
“What’s making you cry?” he asked while you rush to the fridge to get your glass of water.
“What’s got you upset?” you counter downing the cup of water.
Shouto sighed, leaning against the counter of the island in the kitchen. “Would it be weird to say its soulmate issues?”
Swallowing the water in your mouth, you shook your head, a tired smile on your face, “Embarrassingly enough, my issue is also with soulmate stuff.”
A joyless chuckle escaped his mouth, and Shouto’s head tilted backward. You studied his jaw and the way his body seemed tense, too tense.
“What happened?” you press gently standing next to him, shouldering him gently.
“I fucked up, and now my soulmate won’t talk with me,” he says slowly, his head nodding while he glances at you. “I guess telling your soulmate you don’t want them is a bad thing.”
You snorted, nodding your head in agreement, “It’s not just a bad thing, its a super fucked up thing.”
Shouto sighed in agreement, and there was silence when you took another drink of your water.
“I didn’t know you were in contact with your soulmate, though,” you smile wistfully, your hand twirling the cup on the counter. “How’d you meet them?”
“I actually don’t know who they are,” Shouto admitted with pursed lips, and your eyebrows scrunched in confusion. “I have that soulmate thing where you write on your arm, and they can read it.”
Showing off his arm, you glanced at the pale skin. You nodded your head when he pulled out a silver pen that looked similar to yours.
“Well,” you shrug your shoulders, motioning him to write. “I’m no expert, but let’s see if I can help you get your soulmate to forgive you.”
“T-They haven’t responded to me in two weeks…” Shouto’s voice cracks, and the number burns a hole through your stomach. “I’ve written every day, but no answer. I don’t really know what to do, and all the girls in the class don’t really know what to do. Bakugou also said to go fuck myself over it, so I don’t think I really have had any help.”
Ignoring the twisting in your stomach, you willed your weirdness away to shuffle in your seat, “Well, you haven’t asked me, asshole, come on, let’s see what I can do.”
Shouto chuckles, his head nodding, “That is true, but to be fair, you’ve been anywhere, but in the dorm these past few weeks.”
“I lost something,” you mutter embarrassed, but you shake away your problems and point at his wrist. “Write an apology.”
You watched when he wrote, the words expressing his apology and love seeping through the silvery ink on his wrist. You told him to add things to delete things, but in the end, it ended up feeling like a genuine and sincere apology. You watched his pen leave his skin and a warmth shot through your arm. 
Shivering, you looked at your arm, trying to see what your soulmate had written to you even though he said he was going to stop.
The words he wrote appeared on your skin.
Your eyes widened when you stared at Shouto, who was also staring at your arm. 
Your eyes met in an almost world-altering way. This entire time, for three whole years, the two of you had been by each other and never knew. Midnight conversations wasted through ink instead of face to face. Your heart hammered in your throat, and tears once again poured from your eyes when you both stood at full height, staring at each other.
Todoroki Shouto was your soulmate — he was yours, and you were his.
“I’m so sorry, y/n, I don’t know what happened to me. You didn’t deserve that, and fuck, I’m so sorry—”
“I lost my pen, and I couldn’t respond back, I forgave you, but I had no way of reaching back! But I was always forcing myself onto you—”
You both interrupted the other, and now you stared at each other, drinking in the presence of each other and belittling yourselves for not knowing sooner; looking at it now, it was just so obvious. You can’t help it and pull him into a hug. His strong arms wrap around you, and you can hear his hammering heart on your ear, and it fills you up with the familiar warmth when he writes you. This seemed to be a brush of luck it seems.
“Can I kiss you, soulmate.”
“Please do.”
2K notes · View notes
mintwithchoco · 4 years
Text
loonathesmut: Dawn
LOOΠΔ Jinsoul x Male Reader
Word Count: 6306 words
Categories: smut, oral, shower sex, stepsister! jinsoul
note; my first smut! i haven't seen anyone do a jinsoul smut so here! i think i focused too much on the plot but i tried my best to incorporate a lot of smut in here! i feel like it's also pretty cringey so bash me all you want lmao
note(05312021); thanks to an ask from an anon, me and @closedafterdark​ have done a few edits and even added a shower sex scene to make the story better.
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12 AM was displayed on the clock.
You were still awake, trying to finish an assignment that has been keeping you up the past three days.
It was raining harshly outside, the droplets pelting your window adding on to your laziness. You wanted to wrap yourself under the covers of your blanket and drink a cup of piping hot chocolate. Instead, you were working on a chemical equation when your attention was moved to the knocking sounds on your front door.
You were a bit confused about who was coming to your apartment this late at night. You suddenly thought about your friend. Maybe he forgot something? Or maybe it’s your mom, making a surprise visit at midnight. Though, that one seemed less likely as she was usually asleep by 8 PM.
You quickly rushed towards the door. To your surprise - it was neither your mom nor your friend. It was your stepsister, Jinsol.
You and Jinsol have been step siblings since you both were kids. She’s only a year older than you, which made it easier for you to bond with her. You still remember the days where you and her were playing hide and seek, beating each other in Super Smash Bros and sharing lunch together at school.
You and her were almost like real siblings, some might even say twins because of the similarities. Both of you had the same interest in food, music, etc. Furthermore, you were always together with Jinsol everywhere you went. If people didn’t know that you are both step siblings, chances are that you would’ve been mistaken as a good-looking couple.
But the truth was, you did have a little crush on her. You knew that it was wrong, but her personality is really similar to your ideal type. Caring, adorable, and a little clumsy at times, you obviously couldn’t say no to her. Adding on the obvious fact that she is really pretty from head to toe, it’s no wonder you were always nervous around her.
Now that you two were grown up, you have taken different paths in life. She has become an idol in a group called Girl of the Month, or more commonly referred to as Loona. The group has been doing well these days and of course, you were happy for her. You, on the other hand, continued your studies at a university in Incheon in the biochemistry field. Even though you and Jinsol were not living together anymore, both of you still kept in contact. It was almost a requirement to message each other almost every day and video calling whenever possible.
“Noona? Why are you-” you asked, blinking your eyes at her. She interrupted you from finishing your sentence by holding up two plastic bags with takeaway food inside. You automatically get them from her hands.
“The company gave me a week of vacation. Haven’t seen you in a while so I decided to pay my lovely brother a visit!” Jinsol said enthusiastically.
“But, why now though? It’s dangerous to be out at night, let alone someone as clumsy as you could get harmed.” You said, teasing her as a way to mask your visible concern.
“There’s less people at midnight. Plus, I had a bodyguard on the way here.” Jinsol answered, kicking off her shoes while entering your apartment.
“Oh really? Where is he?” You asked, peeking outside your door and not seeing anyone else with her.
“I told him to go back home. Which means, you have to take me back tomorrow! Ahh, it’s been a while since I’ve been here!” Jinsol answered while walking around the living room, looking at all of the new trinkets and decorations you have accumulated since her last visit.
You sighed deeply as you watched her pace around. Jinsol then plopped down face first onto your couch and gestured at you to sit beside her. You walked towards the couch, placing the bags of food on the table nearby and sat down beside her while holding in your nervousness.
Why were you nervous, you wondered. Is it because it’s been awhile since you’ve seen her in person? 
She was wearing a black long sleeved crop top with a black sleeveless top underneath, allowing you to see her toned abdomen. Her black shorts made your heart race faster due to how short they were, showing off her extremely long legs. Her creamy thighs looked delicious and the subtle hint of her buttcheeks were making your loins begin to burn with desire. You were thinking of very impure thoughts but did your best to suppress them.
Jinsol reached for the remote and turned on the television. You opened the bags and began taking out the styrofoam boxes of food out.
“By the way, why are you still up at this time? You were always asleep as early as possible.” Jinsol asked.
“As usual, assignments. I’ve worked on them for days now. Seems like they’re impossible to finish.” You said while opening the boxes. Once they were opened, you instantly smiled as the fragrant aroma of the food traveled into your nostrils. 
“Fried chicken? Oh you shouldn’t have!” You quickly ran to the kitchen and grabbed some utensils. Jinsol simply smiled at your actions.
“What do you want to drink?” You asked.
“Do you have any Sprite?” Jinsoul said.
“Yeah, I do.” You opened the refrigerator and took out two green cans of the unmistakable beverage.
With utensils on your right hand and the two cans of Sprite on your left, you went back to the couch and gently put them down. Both of you quickly dig into the food while watching a random movie that Jinsol put on.
The both of you talked a lot while eating, the movie serving as a background afterthought. From the funny moments during her fansigns to your experience working part-time at a daycare, your heart was constantly beating. The nervousness could be heard in your voice with each of your responses. You were quiet whenever she spoke and stuttered when answering her questions, often repeating certain words a few times. Every time you stutter, Jinsol would smile. Sometimes she would giggle for no reason and it only increased the furious rate your heart was pumping at.
Halfway through the movie, Jinsol suddenly asks a question that you’ve been avoiding to answer.
“Hey, baby brother?”
“Yeah?”
“Do you have a girlfriend?” Jinsol asked casually.
“Uhh no..I’m too busy with assignments and studies. I barely have enough time for sleep these days, much less a girlfriend.” You answered calmly.
“Ehh..really? How about a crush?”
“Not really. I don’t really know any girls at the university. Most of my interactions with them are about assignments or if they could borrow my notes from the previous lecture.” You felt slightly bad for lying to her, since you knew a handful of pretty girls in your university.
“How about you noona, are you interested in anyone?” You directed her question right back at her, mentally preparing yourself to be heartbroken.
“Yeah, I do actually.” All the color in your face was gone as you felt your heart metaphorically being glass and shattering into a million pieces. But you still held out hope that it was just one of her jokes...
“Oh really? Then tell me how attractive this guy is.” You teased.
“Hmm, let’s see. He’s handsome, pretty athletic, smart, kind but what’s important is that..” Jinsol stops and stares at you.
“..he’s like a little brother to me.” Jinsol ended her statement when your faces were mere centimeters and turned her focus to the movie.
You were visibly confused. Why would she emphasize her crush to be a ‘little brother’? You tried to wrap your head around it by watching the movie as well, occasionally stealing glances at her. But her words still lingered in your mind.
It was around 2 AM when the movie finally ended. You looked towards Jinsol and saw her fast asleep. Being the good brother and host you are, you delicately lifted her into your arms to bring her into your room so that she could sleep on your bed. The impure thoughts reared their ugly head into your mind as you did so.
After gently laying her down on your bed, you grabbed some pillows and blankets to sleep on the couch. You decided it was too risky to share the bed with Jinsol otherwise.
Just as you were about to close the lights and head to the living room, you felt a hand grab your arm. You looked back to see Jinsol who had a sleepy look plastered on her face pulling you back.
“Where are you going?” Jinsol asked with a quiet and raspy voice. Her exhausted voice sounded so seductive, almost causing you to choke on your own saliva.
“I’m s-sleeping on t-the couch. You know, t-to give you privacy…” You said, failing to not stutter that you had just managed to control.
“You’re not gonna feel comfortable sleeping on the couch. Just sleep here.” Jinsol said again.
“But-” You tried to resist but Jinsol pulled your hand even harder.
“F-Fine…” You said as you gave up and sat beside her on the bed. You were hesitant to do so, your king-sized bed feeling like it was too small for the both of you.
“Just lay down! I won’t eat you.” Jinsol teased.
You laid down slowly, feeling like you were going to melt and sink into the bed. Once you got comfortable, Jinsol pulled the blankets over the both of you.
“Goodnight, baby brother.” Jinsoul said, giving you a kiss on the forehead and then turned on her side, facing herself against you.
“G-Goodnight, n-noona..” You said, trying to stop your rapidly hardening erection below from waking up because of the perverted thoughts you were having.
After around twenty minutes, you still couldn’t sleep because of the close proximity between you and Jinsol. You looked to your side and saw her sleeping soundly. You couldn’t deny how pretty she looked while sleeping. After some time and your erection teasing you, you managed to fall asleep.
//timeskip//
It was now 6 AM.
Jinsol felt a weird sensation all over her body.
She was heating up from head to toe, but it was not due to a fever.
Her bottom was where most of the warm and weird sensations were coming from. She felt that something hard was touching her. She tried to move her hips around and suddenly moaned. She quickly stopped, afraid that her moans would wake you up.
She doesn’t know why, but the thing that was touching her clothed vagina felt good. She felt herself getting wet because of it as well. She wanted to get up and inspect what exactly was touching her. But then she thought about you, so she scrapped the plan and decided to just see what was going on.
She slowly opened her eyes. It was dark but she could still see a little bit. She looked at her back and to her surprise, you were hugging her tightly. Your face was close to her neck and your right hand was at her waist. Moreover, the thing that was poking her was coming from you.
Jinsol smiled.
The truth was, Jinsol also has feelings towards you. The person that she described earlier in the evening was you. She always loved how you were nervous around her. Sometimes, she would touch herself after she secretly caught you staring at her body. It was like this for two years until you and she went your separate ways to pursue your own careers.
And now she was here, visiting you with one goal in mind. To actually confess her feelings towards you. She was going to just confess normally. But now, she had an even better idea due to this newfound situation.
She slowly gets off the bed, removing your hand away from her waist. With her off the bed, your body laid flat just how Jinsol wanted. She gets on top of the bed again and crawls in between your legs towards your crotch. Throughout all of this, you were still sleeping heavily.
Now at your crotch, Jinsol licked her lips. She was finally getting ready to do the thing that she had been longing for. Thankfully for her, you were wearing baggy pants so Jinsol had no problem removing them and your underwear in one swift motion.
Your hard cock sprang out, almost hitting her in the face. Jinsol’s pussy was drenched at this point, seeing all the possibilities that she could do with your cock. She slowly strokes it, hoping that it would wake you up. But being the heavy sleeper you were meant Jinsol would have to try harder.
After stroking your cock for some time, Jinsol licked the tip that was already leaking with precum, making you moan a little in your sleep. Jinsol kept licking the drenched tip until she saw you moved slightly. Eventually, she got her wish as you woke up.
“Ugh….huh? Noona what are you-” Jinsol quickly put her finger on your lips.
“Shh, baby. I know you have been wanting this.” Jinsol said in a seductive tone.
Without any hesitation, Jinsol took your shaft into her mouth. You instantly moaned at the contact, pleasure washing over your body as Jinsol kept sucking your cock gently. You couldn’t believe that your step sister was so good at giving you head. She then stopped sucking and stroked you slowly. 
“You know, I have been eyeing you for quite some time, baby. You might not know this, but I have caught you staring at my body a bunch of times.” Jinsol said while teasing your sensitive tip, flicking her tongue against it. You felt like you were in ecstasy as she stroked your cock and teasing your tip.
 “Sorry, n-noona..I can’t- ughh…h-help it..you’re too hot- oh my god..” You tried to answer but failed as the pleasure overwhelmed your senses.
“Tell me, what do you like about my body?” Jinsol said, stroking your cock faster.
“E-everything….” Your cock was twitching at this point when Jinsol suddenly stopped, causing you to whine.
“Come on, baby. Be more specific or else I won’t let you cum.” Jinsol started to stroke your cock again at a delicately slow pace.
“Your t-thighs. I love how delicious they look.” You said. You were getting used to her strokes, causing you to throb in her hand.
“Mmm, more?” Jinsol began to stroke faster.
“Y-your ass. I just wanna spank it every time I see you w-wear shorts.”
“You gotta have to work for that, baby. More.” Jinsol strokes you at an even faster rhythm.
“Your abs. I really like how sexy your a-abs look when you wear crop tops.”
“Thank you, I worked really hard on them. Last one, baby. Don’t stop now, you’re almost there.” Jinsol was now stroking you at max speed.
“Y-your b-breasts. I could suck o-on them all d-day.”
“Good boy. Now, for your reward.” Jinsol took your shaft into her mouth, starting from the tip.
You immediately moaned. Jinsol starts bobbing her head on your cock, taking it inch by inch. She gripped your thighs while you ran your fingers through her blonde hair. Eventually you hold the back of her head with both hands, the two of you are deeply absorbed by the erotic act. You mentally counted the seconds that passed, wanting to see how long she would be able to hold you for. Jinsol shakes her round ass as you force her head deeper. You felt her throat make contact with the tip of your cock, causing you to let out a wordless scream of pleasure. After about twenty seconds, she releases your cock. Gasping for air and a generous amount of saliva dripping from your cock and her mouth, she giggles in satisfaction. Your brain was beginning to overload from the pleasure. 
Jinsol’s panties were drenched with her juices since she started. While she was sucking your cock, her hand slowly went inside her panties. You saw what was happening and took advantage of it.
“Noona..let me help you out.” Jinsol understood what you were trying to do and eased her mouth off your cock, causing you to whimper. She turned around so that her hips would be up against your face. You got to work by pulling her shorts and her panties off in one motion, mirroring what she did to you.
“Impatient aren’t we?” Jinsol said and returned to slobbering on your throbbing cock. Tossing her shorts and panties on the floor, her beautiful pink pussy was glistening with her juices, making you drool. You dive right in, licking her clit like it was your last meal. Jinsol moaned loudly on your cock, adding on another layer of pleasure. You grabbed her thick thighs to get a better grip while eating her out.
Both of you were a moaning mess. Jinsol was bobbing her head on your shaft while you were eating her pussy out. Jinsol started to fondle your warm balls, raising the volume levels of your moans. You weren’t one to be defeated so easily, starting to finger her drenched pussy with two of your fingers. She responds with an even louder moan than before, aroused by how you were giving her pussy your full attention.
Jinsol bobbed her head harder and faster on your cock, causing you to add another finger inside her vagina while licking her clit. You and Jinsol were sweating profusely, but it doesn’t stop the both of you from continuing to pleasure each other. Suddenly, Jinsol stops sucking you off and strokes your shaft hard.
“Baby, you’re so good at that. Don’t you fucking stop.” Her words made you move your fingers even faster into her. She replies in earnest by sucking your cock even harder.
Eventually, both of you can’t hold it any longer. 
“I-I’m gonna cum, baby! I’m gonna cum!” Jinsol said and continued her assault on your dick. 
“Me…too…” You replied back with a breathy voice. 
Jinsol came first, violently. She arches her back as the floodgates opened and you were rewarded handsomely with her sweet nectar. You tried to take it all in but she came so much that it was starting to leak out of your mouth and dripped onto your neck. Meanwhile, your cock twitches and explodes inside Jinsol’s mouth. She lowered her head and tried to take all your cum in but was unsuccessful because of the large volume of your load.
Both of you were struggling to breathe after your intense orgasms. Jinsol looks back at you and stares deeply into your warm brown eyes. She then removes her body off you and plops back on the bed. She kissed you on the lips. Each connection sent small jolts of electricity jolting through your body. The taste of her strawberry lipstick mixed with your cum was amazing. After making out for a period of time, both of you pulled back, leaving a trail of saliva.
“I taste pretty good.” You said.
“Yeah, I love how I taste too. Now, let’s-” You interrupted Jinsol by pinning her down, kissing her again, quickly grabbing her shirt and throwing it off the bed. Jinsol smirked and did the same, except that she ripped your shirt off you.
“You look good.” Jinsol complimented you, biting her lower lip as her eyes hungrily eyed your exposed body.
“You look even better without this.” You removed her black top to reveal her breasts that were being covered with a blue laced bra. Her breasts weren’t the biggest, but were enough for you to fully grab a handful. Your impatience took over your admiration of them and you pulled her bra off, exposing her plentiful breasts. Jinsol moaned over your actions as the cool nighttime air made contact with her exposed skin.
Now the both of you are finally naked together. You start off by kissing her cheeks, creating a trail as you make your way through her neck and eventually, her breasts. You immediately dive into her pink nipples which were already stiff. Jinsoul softly moans into your ear, enjoying what you were doing to her body. You sucked her left nipple, then moved to the right. The breast that wasn’t in your mouth was being fondled by your hand.
Jinsol was shivering with pleasure. She didn’t get relaxed, however. Instead, she reaches for your cock and starts stroking it. You moaned slightly because of her actions. After having fun with her soft flesh, you pepper her stomach with kisses and trace her abdomen by licking it with your tongue.
“Baby, do you love me?” Jinsol suddenly asked.
“Of course, noona. You’re the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen.” You answered with no hesitation.
“Then, prove your love by fucking me as hard as you can.” Jinsol’s dirty talk has made your cock throb even harder than before.
Fueled by Jinsol’s dirty talk just now, you turned her body around so her back was facing you and lifted her up so she was on her fours. Before lining your cock with her dripping pussy, you spanked her round ass several times.
“F-Fuck! Slap my ass again, baby.” Jinsol moaned.
You spanked her again and again, gaining a series of loud moans.
Your cock was now in between her dripping heat. It felt so warm, inviting. This was the moment that you have always been dreaming about and you don’t wanna lose this chance. You started by teasing the outside of her folds, collecting her nectar that was dripping. 
“Stop teasing me already, baby...” Jinsol moaned at the feeling of your hard cock nudging her entrance.
You grabbed her wide hips, aiming your cock and started to push into her slick folds. Both of you gasped and moaned. You never felt the feeling of a vagina before in your life and never knew how tight they could really be. You pushed into Jinsol even more, feeling her walls wrapping your shaft. Jinsol was lost in pleasure, leaning her head back and enjoying how you felt inside of her. Eventually, all of your cock went in. You savored the feeling of her plump ass against your crotch.
You slowly pull away from her pussy and stop before your tip comes out. You pushed into her again and repeated the process as the both of you were getting accustomed to it. You found a perfect rhythm and started to thrust into Jinsol. Her pussy walls felt warm with your dick embedded in her. Jinsol was a moaning mess, getting louder with each thrust.
“Fuck baby, you’re so big and hard.”
“You’re so fucking tight, noona.”
Slowly but steadily, you increased the pace of your thrusts. Jinsol’s erotic sounds were being an encouragement for you to keep yourself pumping into her. You love how cute she moaned for your cock and how gorgeous she looks being satisfied with your thrusts.
You fucked Jinsol even harder and harder. You wanted to kiss her, so you grabbed her shoulder and pulled her upright so that she’s leaning against your chest. You kissed her lips passionately. 
“Yes, fuck me harder. Turn me into your little slut, baby!” Jinsol’s words went right in your ear and of course, you followed what she said. Her walls were constricting your shaft even more. Your right hand reached towards her breasts, fondling it to give more pleasure to the woman that you love.
Her walls were becoming even tighter as you touched her breasts. Your pace didn’t slow down however, it was increasing like crazy, to the point where her ass is making clapping sounds with your crotch. Jinsoul was in euphoria, being a cute little mess. 
“Baby, h-harder please. I wanna cum all over your fucking cock.”
You put your left hand on her clit and rubbed it while thrusting even faster into her. Her moans have become music to your ears, giving you the strength to keep thrusting into her.
Jinsol then buried her face into the bed. Spreading her legs apart, you began thrusting inside her. You watched as Jinsol squeezed her tits, pinching her nipples as you fucked her hard. You made sure she could feel each thrust.
“Your cock feels so fucking good, I love it so much!” Jinsol moaned loudly, her walls squeezing the life out of your cock as you fucked her. 
Jinsol closed her eyes while she grabbed onto the sheets tightly, desperately hanging on while chasing her impending orgasm. You roughly fucked her as her body moved in time with your thrusts.
“Oh fuck!” She screamed as you held her body tightly in place, your hands making a deep impression on her hips.
“Baby, I’m cumming!”
Ultimately, she shrieks and came hard on your cock. Her walls tighten around you deliciously as you feel her juices flood your cock and begin to seep out, staining both of your thighs. You watched as Jinsol’s body trembled violently, her breathing becoming erratic as your thrusts gradually began to slow down in order to allow her to ride out her euphoric high. 
“Baby… that was amazing.” she said quietly, her mouth still open. You kept a tight hold on her as she struggled to catch her breath.
“I came so fucking hard...” She then looks back towards you.
“You haven’t cum yet, baby. I want your load deep inside of me, so come fuck me again.” Jinsol’s dirty talk reinvigorated you as you pulled out your cock from her and turned her around so that she was facing you. She was covered in sweat but still as beautiful as always. You were lost in her gaze for a couple of seconds.
“Noona, I love you.” You blurted out unexpectedly.
“I love you too, baby.”
You spread her legs to reveal her still dripping pussy. You put both of your hands beside her and lined up your cock with her vagina. Jinsol wrapped her arms around your neck, ready to receive your shaft.
“Ready?”
“Always.”
You pushed yourself into her slowly until your dick fully disappeared into her folds. Both of you moaned together at the euphoric feeling. You pull out from her pussy, leaving the tip and slamming her with a long thrust. She moans in pleasure of your cock being deep inside of her tight hole.
You started to fuck Jinsol in a slow pace. Words couldn’t describe how good the both of you felt fucking while facing each other. Her mouth was open, filling both of your ears with her lustful moans.
“Ahh, baby, I love how deep your dick is inside of me.” Jinsol moaned, her eyes rolling back because of the intense pleasure you were giving her.
“Your pussy feels amazing, noona. It’s so tight and warm.” You replied as you began to thrust faster into her. Jinsol was moaning even louder, following the rhythm of your thrusts. You lifted her feet up and placed them on your shoulders, allowing your cock to enter her even deeper.
Jinsol’s breasts were jiggling up and down and you couldn't help yourself from grabbing onto them while you fuck her. She was obviously aroused by this as you took her right nipple into your mouth. Your pace was getting even faster as the wet sounds of your crotches hitting each other could be heard.
Jinsol suddenly grabbed onto your back and scratched it with her nails. You moaned at her action and the erotic act caused you to pound her even harder. Her juices were splashing against both of your crotches, allowing you to slide in and out with ease. Her pussy was getting tighter and tighter as you pound into her. The only sounds that were being heard in your room were wet flesh and your bodies clapping together.
You thrusted into her as hard as you could. The room felt cold because of the rain outside, but you and Jinsol were drenched in sweat from the heat your bodies were producing. How Jinsol was moaning because of your dick, how warm and tight she was, how her breasts were jiggling up and down while you thrust into her, all of it was too much for you to handle.
“Harder…” she said, sweat dripping off her body and onto the bed sheets. Her eyes slowly began to droop lazily as she struggled to stay conscious.
“You’re so fucking deep, baby. Oh my god...” She cried out, surprising the both of you as she was still able to form coherent sentences. Eventually, that same sensation in her stomach came to her once more.
“Baby, I’m cumming again!” Jinsol screamed.
“Cum…I’m cumming too, noona!” Your words came out in between each breath.
“Yes, cum inside your noona baby!”
Jinsol’s loud screams and your harsh groans reverberated around the apartment as you fucked her until the pressure building inside you released. You suddenly felt a knot in your stomach, marking your inevitable end. You kissed Jinsol before you exploded all your load into her warm cavern, causing her to have another orgasm. You slowed down your pace and thrust deeper into her so your cum can reach deeper into her cunt. Both of your toes curled from the pleasure as your cock throbbed and released several weaker thrusts inside Jinsol. Her body was still shaking from the aftershocks when her body collapsed on top of yours, your cock still inside her.
After a minute of Jinsol milking everything out from your cock, you pulled out from her, watching how the mixture of your cum and her juices was leaking out from Jinsol’s delicious pussy. You laid down beside her, breathing heavily with your cock glistening in the nighttime light.
“Baby, that was amazing. You fucked me so well.”
“Yeah, it felt great…”
“Uhh, noona? Are you okay? I kinda smacked your ass hard just now.” You asked quickly after, a bit concerned after what you did to her.
“Ahh you’re so silly, baby. Of course I’m okay! I love it when you smack my ass.” Jinsol laughed after her statement. The room went quiet for a moment.
“Noona?”
“Yes, baby?”
“Do you really love me? Not just because I’m good at sex?”
“Baby, I have loved you since the beginning. Not because you have a big dick or you were so good at eating my pussy. It’s because I love your personality and how great of a guy you are. The other things are just a plus.” Jinsol said while staring at you. You were staring at the ceiling to avoid meeting her gaze out of embarrassment.
“…Thanks, noona.” You slowly looked at Jinsol and hugged her. Jinsol reciprocates the hug while smiling. After hugging, you looked into each other's eyes. You both then kissed passionately, not caring what the consequences that the both of you were going to face. After a tender makeout that somehow lasted thirty minutes, Jinsol speaks up.
“Now, let’s clean up, shall we?” You both got off the bed and Jinsol dragged you by the hand into the shower of your room. She turns the shower heads on before stepping into the bathtub and holding onto your hand for you to enter as well.
The warm water calms down your aching muscles from the act earlier, giving you a sense of relaxation. It then becomes scalding hot, making you remember how much Jinsol loved hot showers. Once both of you were fully wet, she grabbed the nearby loofah and poured some body wash onto it. A lightbulb was turned on in Jinsol’s head, and so she decided to put on an erotic show for you by lathering up her deceptively curvy body with the soapy loofah. Her hands went up to her breasts, groping them gently and teasing her nipples until she felt your cock becoming hard again in between her thighs due to the close proximity between you two.
“Baby, you just came two times and you’re already this hard again?” She teased, biting her lower lip.
“I can’t help myself when there’s a beautiful naked woman with me in the shower.” You replied, making Jinsol blush.
“Alright, let’s clean you up.” 
Jinsol took her time in washing you, making sure every inch of your skin is covered in the lavender scented body wash. As she traces the loofah, drawing her name on your chest and down to your stomach, she stops on your lower body. Holding your cock in her hands, she runs the loofah across it, creating a tingling sensation in your body. Jinsol smiled as she slowly began to stroke you while softly biting your nipples. You let out a moan because of the stimulation and slowly move backwards until your legs bump into the edge of the tub, making you sit down on the cold and slippery surface. Then, Jinsol straddles your lap and your hard cock pressed against her stomach as she gave you another passionate, lust-filled kiss.
You finally break the kiss when you both feel too lightheaded and need oxygen. Jinsol does her best to catch her breath, her pink lips slightly puffy and her cheeks flushed. She was the most beautiful woman in the world in your eyes and there was nothing that could change that.
“I thought we were gonna get clean-ahh…” You were cut off by Jinsol’s lips finding their way to the place where your lower jaw and neck meet, nibbling on the skin as she leaves hickeys behind, marking you as hers.
“But I want you so bad, baby.” She murmured just loud enough for you to hear, causing goosebumps to form on your body and your cock to throb against her stomach.
Wrapping her arms around your neck, Jinsol lowers her body as she guides your cock back inside her. The two of you moaned as she slowly lowered herself onto you until she had reached your base completely. Jinsol watched you close your eyes as her tight, velvety walls wrap themselves tightly around you once more. She began bouncing her body up and down, her ass jiggling each time. Her body unconsciously tightens her muscles around you, providing a feeling you couldn’t put into words.
“Noona…do that again.” You breathlessly said.
Jinsol clenched her vaginal muscles around your cock again, tightening you in a firm grip and earning herself your cries of pleasure.
Your hands rested on her cheeks once more, watching Jinsol bounce on your lap. Her eyes rolled to the back of her head when you accidentally discovered a certain sensitive spot within her. With each roll of your hips, you make sure to hit that pressure point.
“Fuck, that feels so fucking good.” She moaned when you took her erect nipples inside your mouth, gently biting on them and mirroring what she did to you.
“Yes baby…” She said as her stomach began to feel heavy, the knot inside her twisting. You continue pounding her newfound sensitive spot, feeling Jinsol’s sharp nails raking your back with scratches as her body trembles with an arriving orgasm.
“Baby!” She screamed repeatedly. You continued rocking Jinsol back and forth and side to side as a way to prolong the duration of her impending orgasm.
“Baby, please...” She begged, blowing hot air gently into your ear and encouraging you to keep going. 
Her eyes fully rolled back into her head as your hips crashed against hers. The water was no longer burning hot, but neither of you cared about the temperature change - only focusing on each other. Jinsol felt so comfortable on your lap and in your arms that her eyes began drooping.
“N-Noona, I’m cumming!” You said, the only semblance of a warning as you made a powerful thrust deep inside her pussy. Your cock throbs as her tight, velvety walls clamped onto your dick. You began pouring hot, thick semen inside Jinsol which once again causes her own orgasm to occur. Both of you are moaning loudly in satisfaction.
“Ahh fuck baby...” Jinsol moaned as it seemed like her body’s default reaction to her orgasms was for her eyes to roll to the back of her head. Her body wriggles in pleasure as she continues lacing together incoherent moans and explicit syllables that made no sense.
Slowly lifting up her hips, you watched as thick gobs of your semen and her juices slowly dripped out of her freshly fucked pussy. You were surprised you were still able to release such a large amount of cum due to your two orgasms that you had earlier. When the two of you are finished, you both catch your breath as she leaned down and gave you tender, passionate kisses. Jinsol is fully satisfied, happy to be in your arms again. But this time, it had a different, a more special meaning. 
After spending two hours having sex in the shower that ended up being dirtier rather than getting clean, you and Jinsol quickly get dressed to go to Seoul to drop her off because she had planned to go shopping with your mom. She didn’t bring any clothes with her, so she borrowed some of yours. She wore one of your hoodies and a pair of shorts that complimented her figure nicely. When she came out from your room after dressing up, you instantly chuckled at how cute she looked wearing your clothes.
“You look so cute, noona!”
“Of course, your noona looks good in everything. Let’s go now, I don’t wanna be late.”
“Okay Jingolas-nim!” You said to her and opened the front door for her. She just glared cutely at you and went out the door. Meanwhile, you smiled, thinking how your life is complete with the newfound existence of an intimate relationship with your stepsister, Jung Jinsol.
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dawninlatin · 3 years
Text
Queen of Peace, chapter 13
A manorian high school AU
Words: 2563
AO3 Link
Masterlist
Summary: Manon Blackbeak is flawless, untouchable. From the outside at least. Her grandmother pushes her to achieve greatness, and she doesn’t let anyone get too close in fear of being hurt. How can anyone love her when not even her parents could?
Dorian Havilliard has always felt safe and confident around his friends. He might not have the greatest of families, but with Aelin and Chaol by his side, nothing can go wrong. That is until he tries keeping his greatest secret from them.
What will happen when Dorian and Manon gets to know one another? Can two lost souls find their way back together?
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Oh, the queen of peace
Always does her best to please
But is it any use?
Somebody’s gotta lose
-Florence + The Machine, Queen of Peace
The music roared out of the speakers, and Manon moved her body to the rhythm, letting herself get lost in the upbeat tones. She had done this a dozen times by now, memorized this choreography weeks ago. 
But then she turned to the right, and it wasn’t Asterin dancing beside her - as it had always been - it was Sorrel. 
It startled her enough that she halted and messed up a few steps. Manon caught up with the others, but she was unable to pour her heart into it like she usually did. Her mind was too busy thinking about Asterin, worrying whether she was okay or not after their grandmother had kicked her out.
Manon had seen her at school a few times in the following weeks, but they hadn’t talked, and she doubted they would. Asterin probably hated her now, after all the horrible things Manon had said to her. 
Getting kicked out is the least you deserve after getting yourself knocked up by a boy who will leave at the first sign of some real responsibility. Don’t come crawling to me when you find yourself homeless and heartbroken. You’re off the dance team, by the way.
Manon hadn’t meant what she said, not really, but maybe this was for the better…
Her grandmother had made it very clear that she was not to talk with Asterin anymore, and Asterin avoiding her, hating her, made everything much easier.
Yet, if it made things easier, why did it also make her so sad? The house had been awfully quiet these weeks, so quiet it was near-stifling. Manon hadn’t realized how different, how empty, home would be without Asterin there.
Stop moping around you sad, pathetic fool!
Manon mentally scolded herself, forcing her attention back to the dancing. She couldn’t keep letting this distract her. Asterin was simply an obstacle who no longer stood in the way of her future.
Finishing the rest of the choreography, she ignored the desperate, disappointed voice inside her head that whispered; you’re beginning to sound like her.
When the music faded into nothing and her body stopped moving, Manon put on her usual mask of cold, calculating boredom and turned towards her team. She immediately knew something was up, as they were all looking at her as if they had something to say, but didn’t dare say it.
«What,» Manon said, more an order than a question. If they had all decided to gang up against her, she only wanted to get it over with. 
The girls exchanged wary glances, before Sorrel took a step forward and said, «We need Asterin on this choreo.» Manon was surprised when Vesta, who leaned against the wall with her arms crossed, stayed silent for once.
With a sigh, Manon answered Sorrel, «And why the hell do we need Asterin?» 
Yet again did they all look at each other, as if this was something they’d discussed behind her back. The icy feeling of betrayal snaked its way up Manon’s spine.
«Because it’s always been the thirteen of us. We’re off-balance without Asterin.» It was Ghislaine who spoke this time.
«You’ve said it yourself,» Briar shot in from the back of the room. «If just one of us is missing, the entire team falls apart!»
It was when Vesta finally opened her mouth that she snapped. «And you slipped up today, Manon. Several times!» 
«I have no idea what you’re talking about,» Manon hissed, clenching her fists so hard it hurt. «You have been distracted today, hell, you’ve been distracted, lazy and off-beat all week!»
«Because Asterin-» Vesta begun, but Manon didn’t let her finish.
«I don’t wanna hear another word about Asterin! It was her own stupidity that got her kicked off the team, and if you, all of you, don’t start working a bit harder, I won’t hesitate to replace you with someone else!»
The room was unbearably quiet when she was done talking, and Manon could hear her own heart thundering inside her chest. She had to stay calm, couldn’t let them see her fall apart, even if that was what she felt like doing right now. She was losing control, she was-
«I can talk to Asterin today if-»
«GET OUT!» 
Manon’s blood was boiling at the audacity of Vesta. Why couldn’t they understand that Asterin, with her carelessness, was jeopardizing everything they had worked towards? 
Her grandmother had been clear in her orders: everything had to be perfect, so they had to win nationals, which they couldn’t do when one of the teammates first of all didn’t bother showing up to half of the rehearsals, and second of all, would be heavily pregnant come spring.
When everyone had left, and Manon was alone once more, she didn’t let herself brood over the fight they’d just had, didn’t let herself recognize how awful this made her feel. She simply turned the music back on, and forgot.
She forgot everything she’d promised her grandmother, forgot the math test she’d butchered earlier today, forgot the fact that her whole dance team had probably just quit, forgot that she had no control over anything in her life anymore.
Yet as she kept moving her exhausted body, one thought remained. One of piercing blue eyes and soft lips.
And when she remembered that she had an actual date with him the next day, Manon smiled, despite everything.
-
«Why are you looking at me like that?»
How am I supposed to not look at you? Dorian wondered. Manon was radiant where she sat with her body leaned back, eyes closed, face tipped towards the sky. She was smiling softly, the autumn sun making her white-blonde hair glow.
Instead of telling her that, Dorian went with: «I’m just wondering what you’re thinking. You went quiet all of a sudden.»
She had. They’d been sitting here for hours now, under the huge oak tree in the park, eating and laughing and talking, but now she was silent, a calm, contemplating aura around her. 
Manon hummed in answer, before opening her eyes and twisting towards him. «I’m just…savoring the moment, I guess.» Her mouth quirked to the side, the movement making her nose scrunch, and Dorian had to let out a chuckle.
«Now who’s the cliché?» 
She’d been playfully mocking him for his picnic this whole time, even asking him if he was aware that they weren’t in every high school movie ever made. Dorian had begged to differ, telling her that the only reason it was a cliché, was because it worked.
And it did. After a while, Manon had reluctantly agreed that yes, maybe it was a little romantic. The admission had been accompanied by an eye-roll, of course, but what else could you expect?
«What time is it?» Manon asked after a moment. 
Dorian scrambled for his phone, finding it half-lodged under the picnic basket. «It’s almost 3pm,» he said, marveling over how much time had passed. He could spend all day like this, just talking about all and nothing with Manon. No matter what they discussed, she surprised him with her answers, whether it be a funny joke or an unusually deep thought, offering a new perspective on things. 
«I should head home soon,» she sighed, but Manon made no sign of getting up. Instead she laid down, Dorian joining her. «My grandmother will start to ask questions if I’m late.»
From what he’d gathered, Manon’s grandmother was very strict, especially when it came to boys, and Manon had told her she was studying at the library today. She rarely talked about her family, and whenever they touched on the subject, she quickly started talking about something else. Dorian knew not to ask questions, though. She would open up when and if she was ready, and those moments often came at the most unexpected times. 
«I had a lot of fun today, you know. Even if I still think you just googled date ideas and went with the first hit.» Dorian laughed at that, his stomach filling with what could only be described as butterflies. 
«Does that mean you would want to do it again?» They were lying on their backs, face to face, and all Dorian could think about was how badly he wanted to kiss her.
It had been weeks since their kiss in the library, but they hadn’t been able to do it again. All they’d gotten was stolen moments in between classes and late-night texts, their busy schedules making sure of that. Until now, that was.
«I would love to,» Manon offered, answering his question. «But next time I decide what we’re doing.»
«Deal,» Dorian grinned, his eyes staying fixed on her lips as she spoke.
Moments passed, the tension between them tangible, and then Manon whispered, «Is it weird that I really wanna kiss you right now?»
That was all it took for Dorian to crash his lips into hers. 
The kiss was exploring at first, her lips so soft and so perfect. He’d thought about their moment in the library constantly in the past weeks, but his memory could never do it justice, he knew now. This was the real thing, the real Manon, and she was bewitching. No other word could describe the experience that was kissing her.
Dorian pulled her closer, and Manon placed her hands in his hair. He had to continuously remind himself that they were outside, in the middle of a park, and anyone could walk by at any moment.
Yet he couldn’t stop either. Their mouths had gone from searching to ravenous, both of them trying to get closer to the other. Manon nudged him with her tongue, and he opened up for her, the taste of her exquisite.
His blood heated, skin becoming incredibly tight all of a sudden. He could keep doing this forever.
But they had to pull apart at some point to simply just breathe. And they did.
Manon let her forehead rest against his as they both panted slightly, Dorian reaching up to brush a strand of hair out of her face. «I really should go now,» she murmured against his lips, leaning in to kiss him once more. 
It was Dorian who pulled away this time, stroking her cheek. «I’ll see you later then.»
«Yeah,» she sighed, standing up in one smooth movement. The air around Dorian suddenly became unbearably cold. 
After Manon had picked up her jacket, ready to leave, she halted for a moment, and said, «I meant it when I said today was fun.» 
Then she leaned down to place a swift kiss on his cheek, stood back up and walked away, leaving him alone, all flustered. 
Dorian had to wait a moment before he could get up himself, because his pants had just become very tight. His face was burning at the fact, but he forced himself to think of dead puppies and his parents fighting and his gym teacher in those tiny shorts he insisted on wearing.
That last image was particularly horrifying, but it seemed to do the trick. Then, Dorian picked up his phone, only to find fifty new messages from Aelin in their group chat.
Sighing, he began to skim through the thread.
Aelin: Do you guys have plans for today?
Aelin: Rowan is busy
Aelin: And I’m bored
Aelin: Hellooooo
Chaol: I’m guessing I have plans now…
Aelin: I can actually hear how hard you’re sighing right now Chaol
Aelin: We’re seeing a movie today
Chaol: When?
Then there was a lot of planning back and forth, and both Chaol and Aelin trying to reach Dorian. The last message he got was a selfie of his best friends glaring at him, the text reading: Come hang out with us loser.
So Dorian stood, feeling lighter than ever, and began calling Aelin to hear where they were.
-
Stepping into the narrow hallway of her home, Manon carefully closed the door behind her, trying to stay as quiet as possible in case her grandmother was working. 
She hung her coat on the rack and turned her phone on silent. She rarely got any notifications, but that was before Dorian. Now they sent messages back and forth at all hours, most of it silly nonsense.
«Manon, is that you?» her grandmother called from the kitchen. Letting out a shaky breath, Manon made her facial expression that of someone who had studied in a library for hours and definitely hadn’t just made out with a hot boy.
Listen to yourself, you sound like some lovesick girl from those movies you hate so much, Manon mentally yelled, rolling her eyes at how annoying her internal monologue was becoming.
«Yeah, I’m back.» She stopped by the doorway to the kitchen on the way to her room, where her grandmother was sitting by the table, laptop open in front of her.
The woman glanced up at the clock on the wall, before looking back at Manon, her eyes searching. «You stayed at the library for a long time.»
Manon had to fight to stay fully still, to not flinch at her grandmothers words. She couldn’t know, could she? Putting on a fake smile, Manon said, «I just got into a really good workflow, didn’t wanna quit.»
Her breaths were getting faster, and she could feel the panic sneaking up on her.
Just keep it together until you’re alone! She always asks questions like these.
«I’m almost done with the history assignment,» she added to make sure her grandmother bought it. Even if it was all a lie. She hadn’t even started on the history paper.
«Good. I already made dinner, but there are some leftovers in the fridge if you’re hungry.» Her grandmother’s tone was pleasant, almost happy. She had to be in a good mood today, then. The whole thing felt deeply unsettling.
At least she was safe, for now.
«Thanks, but I’m not hungry. I’ll be in my room,» Manon said before turning and hurrying down the hall. Once she’d closed the door, she finally let out the breath of relief she’d benne holding, throwing away all pretense.
She couldn’t keep lying to her grandmother like this…
Not only did it make her feel awful, but the consequences would also be too great. She was putting her whole future at risk when she was acting like this, sneaking around and prioritizing boys over her schoolwork. 
Frustrated, she threw herself down on her bed, startling Abraxos who was sleeping on her pillow. Dorian made everything so much more complicated. Agreeing to go out with him had been a mistake. A huge, huge mistake.
Yet she’d felt better today, happier, than she’d had in a long time. She’d even managed to forget the catastrophe that was her dance team, if only for a few hours. And with this light, fluttery feeling, everything seemed more manageable. 
For now, she could do this, wanted to do this. The thought of not being with Dorian anymore… It didn’t feel right, and she was actually looking forward to Monday, when she would see him again.
She knew this, they, would have to end one way or another, but she couldn’t let go just yet.
A/N: That break really got longer than I anticipated...
It's been nearly a year now, since I first got the idea for this fic and started writing it, and here I was, believing I could be done with it by summer 2020. In all honesty, it feels like I posted chapter 12, blinked, and then 4 months had passed. But here it is, at least:) We have reached the halfway point, and a little progress is better than none. I'm still not making any promises regarding this fic, other than I will finish it, someday, whether that be in 2 months or 2 years. And to all of you who still read, from the bottom of my heart, THANK YOU SO MUCH<3<3 I could not have done it without you!
All the love, Aurora<3
Taglist: @fireheartdreamerstarborn @bookishwitchling @hellasblessed @kit-12 @onfma @ireallyshouldsleeprn @sayosdreams @rowaelinismyotp
I keep a separate taglist for each ship, so let me know if you want to be on any of them!
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airi-p4 · 3 years
Text
Face up (songfic) - Chapter 1
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Epilogue
Remember my illustrated fic + comic ‘The listening’? I started writing this other songfic around that time, since the song is by the same author. This is everything I could finish for Wipril... *sigh*
Inspired by the song ‘Face up’ by Lights. (Lyrics in bold)
Summary:  Marientte is tired. Busy with work, unmotivated and uninspired; her life has become monotonous and lifeless. Regretful for neglecting her friendship with Alya, she finally accepts her invitation to go out one Friday evening to a pirate themed bar called 'Liberty', in which according to Nino, an 'incredible amazing guitarist' was going to play...
AO3
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Chapter 1
' I shouldn't have come '
A mountain of files and clothes are piled on Marinette's desk. Work, work, work and more work. It had been a while now since Marinette's life has been revolving only around her jobs and studies. Days. Weeks. Months. She felt like a robot programmed just for that sole purpose.
Marinette Dupain-Cheng was tired. 
And so was also her best friend Alya, fed up of being turned down whenever she asked her to go out somewhere together.
But not that evening: Alya and Nino decided to drag Marinette out of her lonely apartment, to let her enjoy a proper and well deserved break after days without seeing the daylight. 'How can a 21 year old Lady not go out and have fun!? ' Alya had asked her. And she had been forced to accept, out of the regret of constantly failing and neglecting their friendship.
The chosen place for their friendly meeting was a musical bar on a ship called 'Liberty'. Small round tables and some stools were ready to be used for its consumers, 2-4 seats for table. Some wooden benches with comfortable looking cushions at the sides of the bar and some stand-by tables outside were also part of the ship's furniture. Both outside and interior design seemed to be trying to imitate a pirate ship with dark wooden flooring, walls, stage and counter. Some vintage rock music related posters were on the wall, next to treasure maps and, surprisingly, they still managed to keep the pirate theme on point. The counter was just at the entrance and the lights were focused mostly to the stage at the back of the bar, making the lighting quite low for the guests- 'too dark to draw' , Marinette confirmed.
According to Nino, the best thing about this bar was that, on Friday nights, it held multiple artists performances from 8pm to 12pm, an hour each. And according to him, some awesome guitarist was playing at 11pm. His eyes were showing his contagious enthusiasm and Alya soon got excited too.
But Marinette's mind was not focused on the bar or the music. It was 10:25pm, and Alya had dragged Marinette there early- at 8:40- so they could get a table- the limited seat capacity and amount of customers surely proved it was necessary, but she couldn't focus on her surroundings as in her head thousands of work-related thoughts occupied her mind.
To draw, sew, bake, study and to sleep in order to work more, all in an endless loop. That had been Marinette's routine for weeks, and she had no intentions of stopping until she finished all her constantly coming errands- but they were endless. She felt like a robot programmed only to work and she almost forgot what free time was.
'I want to go home', the aspiring fashion designer kept repeating to herself.
 But the guests of the bar seemed to favor her best friend's ideas: enjoying the music. Marinette's eyes took a minute to observe her surroundings, noticing how crowded the bar was getting as 11pm approached. At her side, Marinette could see how excited Alya and the recently arrived Nino were, clapping and dancing next to her.
 But Marinette was not feeling it. Not at all. 
 A big sigh left her mouth as she used the table as she played unamused with the melting ice cubes from her drink, trying to ignore the strident rock background music. She was exhausted and not in the mood for 'fun'. She was tired and her eyelids were slowly closing, but just when her mind started to find its way to dreamland, Alya called for her attention.
 "Look, Marinette! The guests in the second row middle table are about to leave! It's our chance to get a closer seat to the stage!"
 "Ugh…"
 The stage was just a few steps away, but it seemed like kilometers to the young woman. 
 "C'mon, Marinette! Nino secured the seats! Grab your drink and stuff and let's go over here!"
 Exhaustion and somnolence confused Marinette's senses while Alya jolted and called her. 
 "C'mooon… Nino can't keep looking for our seats forever! Not when there are so many people eyeing up those stools!"
 Marinette knew Alya was correct. And not only that: she was pretty impatient and intense, too, so she was well aware that refusing her was almost impossible.
 Finally, she made it to the closer to the stage table and had a slurp of her drink. 'Maybe Alya is right and I can try to enjoy the live performances?' . 
 She tried, yes. But nothing. She wasn't feeling the music.
'When will I be able to have fun too? When will I be able to have a rest and forget about work? When will I be able to enjoy life? When will I be able to LIVE my life…? '
 I just want to feel alive
She was stressed. No inspiration seemed to strike her lately, and she had been too busy to go look for it. And honestly, she didn't expect to find some in this old-fashioned dark pirate themed bar. With those thoughts, Marinette rested her head on her hands wishing for the time to go faster so she could already go back home. 
The bar became more than full when the clock pointed to 11pm. 
Marinette frowned her eyebrows. "Can I go home now that the performance is over?" She asked. 
Alya directed her a deathly glare and Nino gasped in shock. "No way, dudette! You can't be serious!" The boy then pointed to their surroundings. "See? All these people gathered here to see the musician I told you about! His talent is no joke, just look at that!" An excited Nino commented, showing her how people were even waiting outside of the bar and even outside the ship in order to listen to his music, as she could see through the round fisheye windows. Was it even allowed to have so many guests on the ship? Wasn't it overcrowded? Or going to sink? Marinette worried. 'Why should I worry when I'm already sinking myself, huh? '
"I'm getting all excited already!! Look at that, Marinette" Alya commented. But Marinette was not answering. She was playing with a straw in between her teeth, instead. "Marinette!!" Her friend insisted, but emerging turbulent bubbles on her drink was her only response.
"Oh, look! He's here!" Nino suddenly exclaimed, and both her friends seemed to forget about her to focus on the stage. 'Maybe it's my chance to leave when they aren't looking' , she thought, but she had to wait until Alya's arm stopped being linked with hers to make her move. She hoped for that moment to be soon.
"Wohooo" the crowd became loud immediately after Nino's said guitarist appeared on the stage from the back door. 
 Marinette didn't even look. She wasn't interested. She just wanted to get home, finish her work, sleep, and get some well deserved hot bath to relax.
"Good evening. My name is Luka. Wow, so crowded today! I can see some new faces... Hi there. Thank you all for coming"
'His voice sounds nice' Marinette thought, taking a quick look at him for the first time: blue hair, tattoos, piercings and an electric guitar on his hands. There was a stool ready for him, but he was not using it. His aura definitely stood out and he was glowing in the stage lights.
Before starting, he played a few random notes, to check the guitar and the volume. The crowd was excited just with that. Not interested in the music, Marinette let her mind travel to her work space again, taking mental notes on how to proceed with her commissions when she made it home.
"Today's first song is an oldie: 'Space show' by CrocoDuo" 
It took only an instant for the aura of the bar to change completely. The audience was losing it at the combined sound of his voice and guitar. Some young women were fangirling and squealing. Nino's eyes were sparkling and Alya's body moved, dancing along with the music. 
'He's good' Marinette thought, trying to stop her fingers from tapping on her chin at the music's rhythm. As the song was close to its end, during its instrumental part, the blue haired young man took a big look at the audience, grinning at the excited crowd. Marinette closed her eyes and tried to focus again on her mental work, frowning her nose and eyebrows hard, trying hard to concentrate on finding whatever inspiration she could in the music. But she didn't seem to get it right.
As the last notes of the song elongated, the musician spoke again. 
"Oooh? What do we have here…? Don't you know the rules, lady? No sad faces allowed on this ship!"
Marinette was unaware the guitarist was talking to her until Alya bumped her elbow to her ribs to catch her attention and pointed to the stage. 
"What?"
She was surprised to find the guitarist staring at her eyes. ' He's handsome ' her inner self told her when their eyes locked and she was feeling called by its blueness. Her smile remained unseen, confused and unsure if it was really her the one he was talking to, but her heart skipped at the eye contact.
"Yes, there, the lady on the second row, you… you seem to be feeling like this" he said, and then played some chords that seemed to describe the feelings of her repetitive, uninspired and unmotivated life perfectly. 
She felt like her secret had just been exposed to all the customers of the bar. Embarrassment was too much to handle, and she kept her head low. As the famous song says: 'Killing me softly with his song'.
"A beautiful lady like you deserves to feel something like this" he said, and the music this time brought her back to her cheerful and happy childhood memories, something she hadn't felt for years. ' Wow. How can he do it? ' 
"Let me try to cheer you up". He placed his electric guitar aside and grabbed his acoustic instead. After adjusting it, he sat on the stool and brought the microphone to his mouth. Then, a totally different melancholic sound started filling the bar as he tested the strings. The audience seemed pleased and curious. "That's rare for him" Nino whispered, making Marinette's eyes open even bigger.
Suddenly, accurately and quickly, his eyes darted to meet directly at Marinette's eyes, with a soft but determined gaze that conflicted Marinette's unprepared heart. 
The times you don't wanna wake up
'Cause in your sleep it's never over when you give up
 'Wow… I surely look depressed, don't I?' Marinette thought, surprised of how the lyrics fit with her daily thoughts.
 The sun is always gonna rise up
You need to get up, gotta keep your head up
 Look at the people all around you
The way you feel is something everybody goes through
 Marinette then looked at Alya and Nino, who were nodding with a sympathetic smile at her. The rest of the people at the bar seemed to agree with the lyrics too, nostalgic smiles on their peaceful faces. ' Is it ok to feel like this? Am I really not alone? ' The song continued.
 Dark out, but you still gotta light up
You need to wake up, gotta keep your face up
 The lyrics were surely… encouraging. Marinette could feel her heart become lighter and more confident, relaxed too. She then focused again on the guitarist, who had a kind expression on his face that almost made her fall for him. Almost ? 
"C'mon, everybody, help me cheer this pretty lady up!" he said, his smile softly widening as he repeated the lyrics of the song. Soon, the audience joined to sing with him and Marinette felt embarrassed but touched at the kindness of all those strangers towards her. Alya put a supportive hand on her shoulder too, encouraging her to join the chorus.
 And finally her face lit up and she started singing a little after remembering the lyrics. Her face was not looking down anymore and an honest shy smile was finally on her face. 
Alya looked relieved, while Nino had an: ' I told you he was good ' smirk on his face. Meanwhile, the guitarist never stopped smiling at her. 
Luka's gaze was dangerous for Marinette's heart, as a pleasant warmth began to occupy it. A feeling she hadn't felt for a long time was now threatening to stay, sinking deeper inside her heart with every syllable he sang. 
"See? That's much better. You have a beautiful smile. Don't hide it!" Marinette blushed at his compliment and she couldn't stop smiling like a lovestruck fool.
 After winking at her, Luka continued with his performance. "Ready to enjoy some rock and roll now? Next is 'Rock Giant' by Jagged Stone" 
Marinette's favorite song. Did he know that too? ' Wow! It sounds even better than the original' . As soon as he started to play and sing Jagged's most iconic melody, Marinette was finally loosened up to enjoy the music. It was the fastest an hour that had passed for her while having fun. Wow . And she was grinning at the excitement, while trying not to freak out at the short glances and smiles the musician directed to her from time to time, or the long stares she pretended to not notice. She could notice her heart beating again after what it seemed like an eternity. 
She felt alive. More than she had felt in months, maybe years.
But the performance had a set time to end... 
"Thank you for coming. That's all for today. You're the best!" he grinned, while wiping some of the sweat drops that ran down his face. It was obvious he gave it his best and the audience was all in for it. Marinette had never seen anyone able to enthrall the public like this before. He was… absolutely amazing in the crowd's eyes, Marinette's included.
"Noooo!! Encore encore encore!" the bar customers started begging in loud voices, and Luka couldn't keep his gratitude to himself, as his fond smile showed. He looked at his surroundings, slowly, memorizing every face, as if thanking each of them individually. Until his kind yet powerful gaze stopped to focus directly on Marinette's pupils and his smile widened.
 "You want an encore, guys? What does the lady on the second row say?" he teased with a smirk that made Marinette's knees weak. She could feel her face flushing red as the people of the bar's eyes focused on her.
 "E- Encore!" She shouted in a voice she wasn't aware she owned.
"So you want an encore, right? Very well. Here's the last song for today: ' Liberty ' by Luka".
 The energetic and happy cheering for the encore audience lasted only until Luka's guitar strings started to vibrate to form a melody.
 "No way, dude!! A Luka inédite original song! Alya, we have to record this!" Nino fuzzed, pulling his phone out from his pocket. "Awesome!"
The song was amazing and had the audience lose it. 'Wow' . Marinette was speechless and she could feel the adrenaline flow through her body like it hadn't for years. Unable to tear her focus from the musician, the young woman could feel her heart beating faster- too fast.  
When the song finished Marinette noticed how half the audience was crying in excitement and how the fangirling women from before were close to passing out. It was a very good song with good lyrics about looking for your inner freedom- totally fitting for Marinette. And his final greetings started.
"Thank you. Did you have fun?" 
"Yeah!!! Wohoo!!!"
 "Great, I'm glad. Thank you so much!" he giggled. "Thanks to you, it seems I have a new song to write" Luka said, with his sharp eyes and slightly curved smile hinting those words were meant for a certain lady seated on the second row. "And remember: the Liberty is a place where you can be free, honest to yourself. Feel free to come here anytime. Everyone is welcome here. Well, except agent Roger, maybe?" Luka said, pointing at the grey haired woman at the counter, who laughed at his comment. "Good night, everyone!" 
Before leaving the stage through the back door, Luka exchanged one final look with Marinette and waved at her. Or so she wanted to believe, even if she wasn't sure. 
‘ He’s so hot ’. Marinette fanned herself with her hand and drank all the alcohol that remained on her cup. It wasn't cold anymore and she needed to cool down, so she stopped the goth waitress with long purple hair to order a drink, and a minute later the small blond short-haired waitress brought it to her. She drank it in one shot, mouth dry from the shouting and her burning cheeks and quickly beating heart.
"Hot much?" Alya teased her best friend, with a knowing smirk.
 "I told you he was lit! Wow! He even played a brand-new original song! You don't know how lucky we are. We have to come back again sometime soon!" Nino enthusiastically exclaimed. "A man like that is going to make it big in no time. We won't get the chance to get to listen to him like this when he becomes internationally famous"
Marinette couldn't help it but to agree. He was amazing… in all aspects. Maybe… it wasn't a bad thing she came… 
 No. It definitely wasn't.
 "Yeah… maybe live performances aren't bad… maybe… we should come again, yes…" Marinette said under her friend's satisfied and knowing smile.
 Who would have thought she would find inspiration on a pirate ship themed bar? She had unwillingly come and found something she didn't regret, as she found something even more unexpected: a crush on a talented guitarist. 
 And even though she was not sure if she was ready to pursue someone or to start a relationship, she knew she didn't want the clock of her life to keep spinning around a monotonous life, and she had just felt the way she had been wishing to feel for years; ALIVE. 
'Yes… I'll definitely come back again'
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