#But it's nice that live action can showcase his kind and soft side a bit more

[infriga]

Some people have been saying that live action Sanji feels a little bit more soft and endearing than manga Sanji, but they can't pinpoint why because he does still feel like Sanji. Some people think it's just Taz's acting, and he does do a great job, but I don't think that's the main reason. Others think his flirting has been turned down a bit, but honestly it hasn't really? He still openly flirts with Nami when they first meet, and he still says things like "women are a mystery to be unraveled" and other goofy simp stuff. And his kindness like being willing to feed the hungry no matter what is obviously something that was always there (it's why Luffy chose him in the first place. Hell, in the manga he chooses Sanji as his cook before he ever actually tastes Sanji's cooking, simply because he sees Sanji feed Gin and realizes what kind of person Sanji is).

But there is a difference! And I've figured out what it is, because there IS one manga/anime Sanji trait that wasn't present in live action Sanji: his hatred of men.

Live action Sanji isn't a misandrist anymore 😳

#One piece #OPLA #OPLA spoilers #Obviously it was played for jokes he wasn't like actively cruel towards men and was kind to them too #Like feeding them if they were starving #And he obviously cared about his friends #He was misandrist is a silly cartoonish way #But it did highlight the way he treated women differently from men and made his flirting and simping come across as way more over the top #In comparison to how he behaved towards women #And I think it was a smart choice because English speaking audiences are especially sensitive to that sort of thing these days #I think the only other thing that gives him a slightly different vibe #is live action can't give him heart eyes or have him do the wiggling stuff lol #So his simping feels toned down even though technically he simps a similar amount as in canon #I do think it's funny how some fans like him better in live action because of this on tumblr dot com aka the OG man hating website #Like fans who are caught up understand WHY he's hostile towards men compared to women in canon (see: WCI) #but I don't mind them leaving it out in the live action #And it isn't like an integral key to who he is as a person/character #People who were already Sanji fans knew he was their problematic little meow meow #But it's nice that live action can showcase his kind and soft side a bit more #Like that stuff is already there in canon but he's a little more tsundere about it y'know? Lol

[arigatouiris]

animal instincts // inosuke x reader

Author’s Note: Another draft pick hahahahah. I headcanon that Inosuke is like this when he’s in love~ My poor misunderstood rough boi who deserves nothing but the world! I hope ya’ll like this, I put some effort into this one hahahaha. Thanks for reading!!

Word count: 4069

Pairing: Hashibira Inosuke x Reader

Warnings: fluff, slight spice (things get a bit heated here UwU) idk, slight angst, SPOILERS FOR THE KIMETSU MANGA

Zenitsu had a question plaguing his mind ever since (y/n) (l/n) came into his life. Not that he didn’t try wooing her and asking her to marry him, no, she turned him down rather decently and kindly, which forced him to think of her as a good friend. She was a demon slayer herself, having hailed from the same training that Kanao went through. 

As sweet and loving as she was, (y/n) could be just as violent; albeit, Zenitsu and the gang had only seen this side when she fought demons. Her violence was through a silent battle that she knew she would win, and her swordplay was fascinating to the eye. Her mother was a dancer, somewhat similar to Tanjiro’s father, and her mother had taught her everything she needed to know about dance.

However, life wasn’t too kind. (y/n) lost her mother when she was 12 and had been training under Shinobu to become a demon slayer since. She had learned the breath of the flower from Shinobu, but developed her own style scheme by performing different moves through dance. It was, to say the least, impressive.

(y/n) and Inosuke shared a rather weird relationship. 

The first time they met was in between their missions. All four of them were surrounded by a total of seven demons. Inosuke stepped in wanting to be the one to take down everyone, but quietly, (y/n) held him back (almost yelled at but the second Inosuke’s gaze met hers, he grew strangely quiet, which was unlike him). 

     “We need to plan this out. When you’re cornered, you don’t attack head-on. That’s suicide.”

She turned to Inosuke’s mask and grinned, “You’re better alive than dead, right?”

Zenitsu didn’t miss the fuwa fuwa that came out of his boar friend right then, but he was shitting his pants for something else entirely. It was after that did she introduce herself, rather peppily, and seemed like the most happy-go-lucky person they had ever laid their eyes on. Inosuke seemed particularly soft with her, which was very unlike him, but no one made any comment about it. 

     “So Inosuke, why did you become a demon slayer?” (y/n) asked, with a chirpy voice.

Zenitsu and Tanjiro watched as the white puffballs around Inosuke grew in number but the male grunted and walked away, leaving (y/n) there with a confused but happy smile.

     “What happened?”

Zenitsu hit himself on the forehead.

The thing that Zenitsu’s mind was plagued with was this: How would Inosuke behave if he was in love with someone?

For this, he’d need to understand how animals behaved. When an animal finds a potential mate, the male of the species would perform a series of activities in order to impress the female of the species. Like, in birds, the male bird would perform a wide range of dance moves or hops to impress the female, who would display her interest by signalling in and chirping accordingly.

Cut to what they were doing a few weeks ago. They were at the butterfly estate, all four of them, and Tanjiro and (y/n) were talking about him selling charcoal for a living. She was a good listener, and for Tanjiro, it was nice to be heard for a change. Perhaps, in Inosuke’s mind, Tanjiro was another male boar, showcasing his skills (Zenitsu wondered if ‘kindness’ can count as a skill) and (y/n) was considering him. Inosuke however, had a better skill—brisk loudness, and the ability to have anyone’s eye on him for longer durations of time because he was just that distracting.

     “(y/n)!” 

Ah yes, he also never forgot her name for a strange reason, but she only thought that was because he didn’t deem her a threat.

(y/n) were right, in a way.

She turned her head toward Inosuke who was holding his two swords near the courtyard. Zenitsu stood a few feet away from where (y/n) and Tanjiro sat, and watched with an unimpressed expression on his face. This wasn’t amusing in the slightest for the blond, for he had seen men pile up over women and behave in a way they otherwise wouldn’t do. But, in Inosuke’s case, it was definitely...weird.

Upon receiving (y/n)’s attention, Inosuke flipped his blades around in the air and did a few stunts, causing (y/n)’s eyes to widen with absolute amusement. Tanjiro smiled a tad bit, before turning to a disgruntled Zenitsu, and understanding thus what was going on. 

     “Whoa, that’s amazing, Inosuke!” (y/n) said, clapping her hands together.

Tanjiro noticed the white fluff balls come out of the boar boy’s head as his actions suddenly stopped. He might have been raised an animal, but Tanjiro’s heart melted at the realization that Inosuke craved the feelings of attention and kindness from people around him, just as much as he wanted to prove himself superior. Inosuke felt a range of things with the two of them, but with (y/n), he certainly felt softer. And whatever the reason might be, Tanjiro believed his friend deserved it—the boy was pure at heart. 

Coming back to the theory Zenitsu had. Tanjiro approached the boy that evening before having a quick word with him over Inosuke’s obsession with impressing you. Both of them knew that it was more than a crush, but it was also quite out of character. While Tanjiro could swallow Inosuke’s need to be softer with her, Zenitsu thought Inosuke believed it was a competition.

     “Well,” Tanjiro pondered, “It might be, in his head. That was how he was raised and that’s how he thinks? Maybe, if we don’t prove a threat to him, he’ll learn better on understanding how to communicate his feelings.”

Zenitsu scoffed, “That idiot won’t know what feelings are if it hit him on his face like a brick. He thinks like an animal!”

Tanjiro chuckled, “Doesn’t mean animals can’t love,” He turned to spot Inosuke and (y/n) in an animated conversation about butterflies, “Most often, they love better than the rest of us.”

Therefore, the two of them decided to watch Inosuke. Zenitsu did it for his own amusement, but Tanjiro enjoyed merely understanding his friend’s nature. There were three things that Inosuke had to fall under if he were in love with (y/n)—and this was all based on observation. Tanjiro knew how animals thought and behaved to a fair extent, and with his knowledge, analysing Inosuke’s behavior around her seemed like the perfect study.

#1. One mate is territorial over the other.

Zenitsu approached (y/n) one evening, wanting to call her over for dinner. She turned to the blond before waving at him, and having him sit beside her. 

     “Hi, Zenitsu-kun. Is there something you need?”

He wondered where his boar friend was at that second. There was no point to this exercise if Inosuke wasn’t around. Not that he minded having a conversation with (y/n), she was sweet. He turned to her after realizing Inosuke wasn’t around and wondered what she thought of him. 

     “So, Inosuke,” She blinked at his words, “He’s weird, right?”

     “Not at all. I think he’s really sweet.” 

Zenitsu blinked, “Really? Even though he doesn’t understand a lot of social cues? It’s because he was raised in the mountains—”

     “I find that bit fascinating, actually. Even though he was raised in the mountains, he’s so kind.”

     “How is he kind?” Zenitsu grumbled.

(y/n) blinked at the blond’s question. 

     “Do you...not like Inosuke-kun?”

Zenitsu shook his head, “It’s not like that, I just think he’s too much sometimes. Abrasive and rash—it’s like taking care of a loud kid!”

She giggled, “I like that about him! Keeps things lively.”

Zenitsu wasn’t sure now on who the weird one was. With (y/n) defending Inosuke like her life depended on it, it was certain that even she had a soft spot for the boy. But, he couldn’t tell if it was built out of sympathy or romantic feelings like he had. She was just kind, maybe, she defended Zenitsu behind his back (although this thought made him swoon on the inside). 

     “Where is he anyway?” (y/n) grumbled, frowning a bit.

It was at that second when Tanjiro came to the courtyard. (y/n) greeted the brown haired boy before blinking up at him. 

     “Tanjiro-kun, have you seen Inosuke-kun?”

Tanjiro hummed before saying, “Hm, I think he left with Kanao-chan somewhere?”

Zenitsu ‘ah’ed before understanding where the boar boy had gone now. Kanao and Inosuke had been training together for a bit, it wasn’t strange since Inosuke always wanted to get stronger than the others. With Tanjiro having beaten Kanao in that little game, Inosuke wanted to do the same. The boy thought everything was a competition. 

     “Oh?”

Tanjiro almost didn’t notice it, but it was good that he was great at capturing certain scents. Growing up with so many siblings had him understand how to differentiate between the scents of various emotions. When (y/n) stood up, waved to them and left, Tanjiro chuckled, catching Zenitsu’s attention. He wasn’t always certain about a lot of things, but he was sure that he had caught the right scent here.

     “What’s so funny?”

It was the scent of jealousy, he thought before shaking his head.

#2.  One mate tries to impress the other by being the best they can be.

Zenitsu hated missions, and he especially hated them when he had to go with Inosuke. However, the only thing holding his sanity together was that (y/n) had offered to tag along—since her crow was nowhere to be found. Inosuke was thrilled and secretly so was the blond, because now Inosuke seemed controllable. He didn’t know how it worked, but he was glad that it did.

They were to head to a village to find a demon behind a few missing people. Apparently, these people headed to work one day and never returned—and this being near a river, there were chances that this demon resided under water.

     “Can you swim, (y/n)-chan?” 

     “Yes, actually. I didn’t learn it the easy way, though. Shinobu-san basically threw me into the river and forced me to learn the hard way.” She said, dejectedly.

     “When you’re about to drown, your body learns to float!” Inosuke yelled, catching your attention.

     “Y-Yeah, I mean, I was the first one to learn too! Inosuke, I also know what plants you can eat from under water!”

     “You can eat underwater plants?!”

     “Yes! I’ll show you someday! When they’re added into your food, it’s so delicious!”

He couldn’t understand where the fuwa fuwa was coming from now—Zenitsu noticed that the fluffballs were everywhere. He wasn’t sure which mate was trying to impress the other here. 

Tanjiro, Zenitsu thought, who exactly is the animal here? 

He normally never did this, but Zenitsu was curious beyond belief! Therefore, he shut his eyes, paused for a brief moment and let his ears do the detective work. All he could hear were sounds of two hearts fluttering in harmony, an image stuck to his brain that he couldn’t wipe off (and if he was a softer, more mature individual, he would admit that the image was a rather sweet one), but Zenitsu being Zenitsu hated the fact that his mountain boy friend was in love with a sweet crackhead like (y/n)—who in retaliation was in love with a mountain boy as well.

#3. A manner of softness not seen anywhere else.

It was strange to see Inosuke being quiet—it was either only when he was in deep sleep or deep thought (which was very, very rare indeed). However, the mountain boy grew quiet a lot these days; especially because (y/n) hung out a lot whenever the boys were around. He’d watch her, observing her movements, trying to replicate whatever ‘decent’ moves she made like trying to eat with chopsticks or not wearing the mask as much when she’s around.

In all honestly, it was quite evident that Inosuke tried being a human being around her and it was sweet, Tanjiro noted, that he’d try so hard to accommodate to (y/n). 

However, Zenitsu didn’t think it was sweet. He wanted to vomit inside his mouth each time he thought of the boar boy being in love, particularly because it was the sort of love that was rare even for civilized people. The blond always had trouble finding people who accepted him for being who he was, and here was someone like Inosuke—whose personality was somehow revered instead of being shunned. 

What the hell is going on? He thought, grumbling, as he witnessed (y/n) crawl over to Inosuke, as if to sneak up on the boy. Normally, Zenitsu would have yelled and alerted his friend, but he just didn’t care anymore—it was comical, and he’d let it be.

     “Inosuke!” (y/n) pounced on the boar boy from the back, tackling him to the ground, surprising him.

Inosuke blinked, his face a dark red, before screaming in playful anger. 

     “What the hell are you doing?!”

     “Fight me!”

Inosuke’s eyes widened just for a brief moment before he growled and tackled her back, causing her to giggle and try to escape the boar boy’s advances. Now, he was chasing her around the estate, something little animals do when they play with one another. Tanjiro smiled at the sight before Zenitsu noticed fluffballs come around him.

I’ve had enough of this.

Walking over to his boar friend, he grabbed the boy from the back of his mask before yanking it off in one go. Inosuke would never mind beating the living daylight out of his blond friend, but the expression Zenitsu had just then caused him to still his movements. (y/n) paused before blinking up at Zenitsu, tilting her head slightly at the sudden halt.

     “Zenitsu-kun? Is something wrong?”

     “You two are what’s wrong!”

Inosuke growned, “What? You wanna—”

     “NO! I don’t want to fight! Do you honestly not see what’s going on here?!” 

(y/n) giggled before saying, “Inosuke and I are just fooling around—”

     “I thought we were fighting—”

     “We are, but it isn’t a fight where we hurt each other.”

     “Yes! I was thinking the same thing!”

Zenitsu slapped his forehead. He pointed to Inosuke and then pointed to (y/n). Tanjiro approached them before placing a calm hand on his blond friend. 

     “You are clearly in love with her and you are clearly in love with him!”

Inosuke didn’t look like he understood what Zenitsu had blurted out, but (y/n) was civilized where Inosuke wasn’t and just then Zenitsu had called her out rather harshly—but, it was the kind of harsh that was perhaps justified. Her eyes widened and she turned to spot Inosuke grab the blond and put him in a choke hold, but her movements stilled. She looked up to Tanjiro who gave her a kind smile before she bit her lip.

Of course she knew she loved Inosuke. Of course, she wasn’t blind. Ever since she first laid eyes on the beast boy, her mind was picked, her heart was his, and her body did things on its own—wanting to impress him, wanting to stand out and make sure Inosuke remembers her name instead of anyone else’s; she wanted to be special to him, and from all her tries, she was bound to know that her feelings for him were nothing short of romantic. 

However, could he perceive romance? Could Inosuke know what these feelings were and could he act on them? Was she the only one making the effort here? She turned to spot Inosuke fighting with Zenitsu the same way he was fighting with her and she began to wonder, ‘What if I’m actually no different?’

Tanjiro smelled the sudden hesitance radiating off of her, but before she could get anywhere, he approached her.

     “(y/n)-chan, I’m sure Inosuke feels the same way—”

     “Tanjiro-kun,” (y/n) wasn’t sure where the sudden hesitance grew inside her. “I just... I need to figure some things out on my own before I...” She turned to spot Inosuke taking off his mask, growling at the blond. 

She gave him a soft smile, confusing the hell out of him, before walking back inside the estate. 

     “Where’s she going?” Inosuke asked, blinking at her retrieving figure.

Tanjiro turned to his friend, curious. 

     “What do you feel for (y/n)-chan, Inosuke?”

     “HAH?” 

     “That’s what I’ve been trying to get him to talk about! But he keeps tackling me!” Zenitsu yelled from the background.

     “What feel for her? She’s (y/n)!”

Tanjiro’s eyes widened almost comically at how Inosuke remembered her name so accurately. 

     “Why do you remember her name so well?”

     “She’s important!”

Tanjiro blinked some more, “Important how?”

Inosuke growled, losing interest in this conversation, “(y/n) is...” He couldn’t find her and that bothered him. He looked to where she had gone off to before frowning some more.

     “Inosuke,” Tanjiro’s soft voice broke his reverie. “Do you love her?”

He didn’t know what love was, but there were a few things Inosuke was sure of. Whenever he saw (y/n), he wanted to be around her more—just like the pair of wolves he had come across as a child. The male wolf would wind its neck under the female’s whenever it was cold, and it was something Inosuke saw himself doing with her, and no one else. He remembered the swans dancing around in the water with one another, attaching themselves by every inch of their feathers and Inosuke wanted nothing more than to learn how her skin felt against his. 

He recalled the group of monkeys that was led by a strong male and a fat female, which was fat because the male had given her his babies. One day, Inosuke dreamed of having little Inosuke babies with (y/n).

If this was what love was then what Inosuke felt for (y/n) was much, much more.

Growling, he ran off to where (y/n) might have gone, and noticed you sitting by the engawa. Taking off his mask, Inosuke sat beside her without warning, and noticed her red face. His eyes widened when he saw that expression on (y/n)—and all the thoughts he had were starting to vanish. Sure, the animals looked happy and did things he wanted to do, but no animal could compare to how beautiful she looked right then. He gulped before leaning closer to her, smelling her face—unsure of what to do at a time like this. Inosuke didn’t want to scare her, but he was confident that she would not be scared.

Zenitsu did not count a fourth thing that Inosuke would fall under if he was in love. The ability to change and adapt for a certain someone.

     “Inosuke, do you... do you know what love is?”

He didn’t, and he sure as hell was scared to tell her that he had no idea.

     “What I feel for you... I want to be around you all the time. I want to hold your hand and... and hold you in my arms and touch your hair—”

Inosuke grabbed (y/n)’s hand forcefully before placing it on his hair, but paused when he noticed her wince.

     “Did I hurt you?”

(y/n) smiled warmly, her heart beating rapidly as she shook her head, “I’m not sure if you know what love is, Inosuke...” 

He frowned, “I don’t know what to tell you.” 

He was an animal, born and raised in conditions that other people could have perhaps not survived. There was very little he knew about the ways of how human beings displayed affection. However, there was one way he was sure of—one way that could perhaps show her what he felt. Prove to her that whatever this love emotion was, it had nothing on him.

Because what Inosuke felt for (y/n) was far, far stronger than some stupid emotion.

He leaned forward and kissed her, grabbing the back of her hair. (y/n) had no idea where he had learned how to kiss, and even if he knew what this meant, but a second later, Inosuke’s tongue darted downwards to her neck, biting it lightly, marking the texture of her soft skin. His hand was firm behind her head and he pulled lightly, pressing her to him—before leaning back and capturing her lips again.

(y/n)’s eyes were wide and she was almost breathless; unsure of how to react, her hands slowly travelled to his hair and she buried her fingers in his hair, marvelling at how soft his locks were. She kissed back slowly, and did not miss the passion Inosuke brought forth with what he was doing. Once again, he pulled away before reaching her collarbone and biting lightly. The second (y/n) let out a soft moan, Inosuke stopped.

     “Do you feel warm?”

Her face rivalled a spider lily. Of course she felt warm!

Inosuke looked at her and smirked, “A male marks his female, in the mountains, this is how beasts mark their mates.”

(y/n)’s eyes widened. Mate? She blinked before grabbing his face and studying it, almost enthralled with what she had learned.

     “Inosuke, there is so much you need to learn!”

But, the second she thought of how his tongue travelled to her neck and collarbone, maybe, he didn’t have to learn much after all.

*

When Inosuke’s firstborn son turned out to be a bit timid, Inosuke acquired the ability—acting out on empathy. (y/n) watched him, hold his five-year old son after the boy had fallen off a small tree and hurt his knee.

     “This is going to sting,” Inosuke said, before putting some pressure on to the little boy’s wound, along with a raw medicine he had made to prevent any infection. 

The boy cried instantly, which caused Inosuke to turn to (y/n), who was cradling their third born daughter, with a smile on her face. He wouldn’t reveal to a great many people that watching his son wince and cry hurt his chest more than anything ever had, but watching (y/n) smile back at him, as he sat there with a smile on his face made him appreciate everything that was soft in the world.

He had stopped asking people to fight him because honestly, it turned exhausting. After having three children, Inosuke had had enough—he wanted to mellow down and sit back, smell his wife’s hair and watch their children grow. He often wondered how Tanjiro and the others were doing, and he thought of how the life in the city was not one for him at all. He hoped that their paths would cross one day, but turning to (y/n), as their youngest daughter cooed in (y/n)’s arms, Inosuke was at peace.

     “What are you staring at!? Fight me!”

Inosuke narrowed his eyes and turned to his three-year old girl, whose expressions and personality rivalled his own. He heard (y/n) chuckle from the back before ignoring her and getting up, grabbing the little girl by her ankle and having her dangle upside down.

     “This—”

     “Stop it, runt.” 

Oh, but he would not deny how much he adored that feisty little spirit of hers. She growled before pinching her father’s hold, causing him to abruptly let her go, as she landed on the ground with a ‘thud’. She got back up and rushed to her father, hands around his neck, Inosuke grumbling before picking her up. If only he had understood that his cries ‘fight me’ were a sign of being touch-starved, he’d have avoided a great many unnecessary fights.

     “Let me go—”

     “Shut up.”

Inosuke’s hand wrapped around his small daughter’s form before running it up and down on her back, calming her down. The child’s eyes widened before she quieted down, and returning her father’s embrace.

A small tug at his sleeve made him look at his son now, who gave him a needy look as well. Inosuke knelt down and picked up his boy, before hugging both of them, standing like a tree in the middle of the house.

     “Never thought you’d turn into such a softie, Inosuke!” (y/n) giggled, before expecting a shout or a loud comeback.

Instead, her eyes widened when she saw him smile at her, each hand cradling his children, as he watched her, with the softest eyes he could conjure.

Honestly, she could never let down the way he told her he loved her each day, not through words, not through mindless actions, but merely by looking at her like his entire life belonged to her. For a man raised in the mountains, Inosuke knew how to love better than the rest of humanity itself.

If only Zenitsu could see the man now, she thought, chuckling.

#inosuke hashibira #inosuke x reader #inosuke #inosuke hashibira x reader #hashibira inosuke x reader #hashibira inosuke #kimetsu no yaiba x reader #tanjiro kamado #agatsuma zenitsu #inosuke fluff #inosuke x y/n #kimetsu no yaiba spoilers #inosuke hashibira x y/n #demon slayer #best boy inosuke

[little-lemon-lattes]

The Scheme

🌛Zelda Spellman x fem! reader

—Word count: 1.9k

— Triggers: Mention of murder and burning in a non-violent context

— Summary: We have part 2 to The Set Up! You and Zelda spend a blissful day together since kissing the night before, and make the most of being together before the mortuary fills with life- and typical Spellman scheming- again!

You were on Cloud-fucking-9.

The previous evening, you and Zelda had kissed. It had been truly extraordinary, even better than the few times you had allowed your mind to indulge in that kind of imagery concerning her. You had never felt that good with anyone before; well, minding that you had neither felt for anyone like that of which you had been trying to cover for the astonishing woman.

She currently lay in the grass next to you, cheek resting tentatively on your belly, as you both just watched each other in comfortable silence. Gosh, kissing Zelda had felt SO good that it had been hard to stop at just one. Like now. Her stunningly bright and beautiful green eyes were boring into yours, but you really couldn’t tell if she was trying to send you a signal or was just unwittingly that gorgeous on the daily. Probably the latter. You also had to remind yourself that, EVEN though you two already lived under the same roof, you would take things one step at a time together. The last 24 hours with Zelda had been like a dream, and the Spellman mortuary had a new air to it now that you knew where you stood.

That morning, you had woken just before dawn (which was much earlier than you preferred), likely still on a high from the feel of Zelda’s lips. Rather than lay there attempting to force yourself back to sleep, you rose from your pillow. Perhaps it was your always-lingering insecurity pulling some strings, but it suddenly seemed desperately important to you- then and there at 4:56am- that you find a way of proving to Zelda that she hadn’t made the wrong choice opening up to you the night before. Just one more bonus of Hilda’s disappearance that weekend being that the kitchen was inevitably free, within a few minutes you had decided to make a spot of breakfast to share. You would never admit it out loud, but you were also buzzing to showcase your culinary ability; of which had been somewhat hindered by the unspoken acknowledgement that Hilda was the kitchen witch of the house.

With that, you were out of bed and clothed in a black turtleneck and mom jeans, as you put the finishing touches on a French braid: all by 5:15. THe next two hours flew by as you whipped up black coffee, almond cake, black sausage, eggs, salmon, bagels, mushroom, and tomato. You were just laying out bloody-fleshed plums and yoghurt when you heard gentle footsteps on the landing above you. Smiling softly, you stopped to admire as the woman padded down the stairs, wrapped in a silky black robe and wiping bits of sleep from her eyes. She stopped dead as she spotted the food on the table, hand still raised to her eye.

“Surprise...?” you peeped.

Zelda’s hand flopped to her side as she tilted her head adorably, treating you to a giddy smile. And you were hopeless to try not to smile right back. That there was enough to have made the last two hours worth it. “

“What’s all this, y/n?”

“I, uh... breakfast?”

Zelda couldn’t help smiling a little more at the cute way you had made it seem like a question. “I see that,” she laughed, “but why?”

You forced an expression of mock pain onto your face.

“I am hurt, Spellman, hurt! Does there have to be a reason?”

All she did was raise her eyebrows in disbelief. You supposed it was probably best to build any chance you had together on honesty.

“Okay, FINE. I just... wanted to show you that last night wasn’t a mistake, in case you were having any doubts.”

Zelda trotted, cat-like, down from her post against the railing, and came to rest just half a metre in front of you.

“Why, there was absolutely nothing of the sort. I hardly slept a wink all night; your lips have something of a memorable feel to them, if I am honest.”

And this time, it was her that closed the space between you, snaking her arms around your waist to pull you closer. One long peck later, the bubblegum-pink shade of your cheeks matched hers in perfect unison, as if in competition.

Breakfast was sweet and long, spent thigh to thigh next to each other, chatting about all the things you had been too afraid to ask each other until that point.

The rest of the day was passed laying next to one another in the winter sunshine, beneath an age-old willow tree. After what felt like just minutes since you had arrived (but had really been hours), you pointed to the sky with the hand that wasn’t clasping Zelda’s.

“Look, the sun!”

You received a lazy “hmmm” in response. Twisting to face her on your left, you couldn’t fight your sigh of content. The High Priestess was laying with her eyes closed in utter bliss, the final rays of Sunday’s sunshine dancing across those glorious lashes.

“It’s setting, Zelda. Everyone will be back soon.” you murmured to her. It was as if you had thrown a bucket of ice over her. Cloud 9 disappeared with the snapping open of her eyes. The soft expression that had occupied her visage all day visibly hardened into her more familiar, stoic one. She leapt to her feet, snatching up the open novel beside her and swinging out her hand to you with force. Time and Space closed in around you the moment you took it, and, the next thing you knew, the two of you were outside the mortuary once more.

You turned to her sharply.

“What was that about?” you demanded. Standing silent for a moment, Zelda’s ears visibly pricked. After a few more moments, she seemed appeased, and swivelled to you. Her shoulders were tense, and you took note of her fingernails digging into her palm.

“I’m sorry,” she whispered, “I didn’t mean to be so abrupt. I just... I am enthused about where you and I are headed, y/n, and I’m terrified that others may not share my enthusiasm. I want to enjoy things as they are at present for a while longer, before having to think about who needs to be involved in our business.”

It was understandable, you supposed, and admittedly: there was a certain appeal to keeping things 007-style, like that fantastic mortal film. You relaxed a bit, and instantly felt awful for raising your voice at her.

You reached for the woman’s shoulder.

“You’re right, Zelds. I understand.”

She looked unconvinced.

“Are you sure? You have every right to want to murder me right now, if you so wished. Although, only if you were to bury me in the Cain pit...” she added as an afterthought.

You had to giggle at that one.

“You’re safe for now, Zelda,” you teased, “now, come on! I need to find a good hiding spot for scaring the BANSHEES out of them when they get back!”

Hilda, Sabrina, and Ambrose literally stomped their feet in sheer disappointment when they arrived back at the house and hadn’t caught the pair of you locked in some form of intimate embrace.

“Aw man! What will I tell my friends?! I had Roz totally excited about y/n finally getting some action... Like, she seriously admitted that she had this big crush on her when she first met her; whiiiiich definitely earned a few looks from Harvey, to say the least. The take-away from it all is that we now know exactly how fragile that guy’s ego is, YIKES, is all I can say.”

All the while, Ambrose was muttering a consistent string of “fuck”s under his breath, and Hilda was deciding whether to scald Sabrina’s ass to Hades and back.

“Sabrina!” her aunt admonished in disbelief, “how could you be so careless?! If any of this gets back to your aunt Zelda, we should consider ourselves excommunicated from her presence for good!”  

All of them fought a cringe. Sabrina looked a bit sheepish.

Hilda turned to Ambrose.

“And what about you, mister? What’s with the constant profanities?”

Ambrose took a step back from his aunt, nobody was sure whether consciously or not. “Erm...hm. Yes. Well. I-” his sputtering was resembling a car trying to start up. Ambrose’s eyes suddenly seemed unable to reach past the witches’ knees.

  “-um. Damn. Hecate, yes, I have... just lost a particularly large sum of money to one Dorian Gray.”

Hilda’s eyes were ready to pop out of her head.   “I was so unequivocally certain that our plan would work! Now where I am supposed to come up with $1000?!”

He was a little manic. The only one of the three who seemed somewhat happy about Ambrose’s situation was Sabrina, sticking a finger at him. “HA! Now that makes what I did so much better!”

Her plum-coloured lips parted with glee, and without warning, her and her travel bag had disappeared. Ambrose made a furious mental note to pour formaldehyde in her evening tea for leaving him here alone. When he had finally built up the courage to look his otherwise cheery aunt in the eyes again, a flash of fear struck him at the murderous look in hers. A low growl exited her throat.

“Well,” she snapped, “I suppose there will be no more silly little attempts on our part to play Cupid.”

As quickly as it had started, her anger dissipated, and was replaced by a certain sadness. Her mouth raised just a fraction, into a tired little smile.

“ ’just thought that Zelds could do with something nice for once. We failed. It didn’t work.”

With that, she picked up her carpet bag and shuffled off up the stairs. Ambrose watched her go, now a lone silhouette in the entrance of their home.

Or so he thought. You waited until Ambrose had moodily trudged down to the embalming room before emerging from your spot in the broom closet. Sniffling a little from all the dust- those things hadn’t been flown for years, SO old fashioned- you felt a mix of emotion at what you had just heard. You hadn’t intended on becoming an audience to some type of scheme, and especially not one of which involved you.

At first, there was embarrassment. You hadn’t realised that your feelings were apparently so obvious! Paired with the fact that Zelda’s must have been too in order to warrant such a matchmaking scheme; along with that you had truly thought that you had done a superb job at keeping it all under wraps, you were left feeling a bit stupid. But then came the funny side of it all, imagining Hilda, Ambrose, and Sabrina sneaking about like the Pink Panther and holding secret meetings about your love life. And finally came the warmth, the realisation of exactly how much the Spellmans had grown to care for you- so much that they trusted you to love Zelda as much as they did.

The whole situation was entirely too much of an opportunity to just leave alone. Grinning with total delight and schemes cooking of your own, you rematerialised in Zelda’s study at the Academy. The loud CRACK that accompanied that particular piece of magic made the woman flinch. Her brow crinkled at the sight of you in front of her great oaken desk. She was a little taken aback, and (it delighted you even more) flustered to see you there.

“Y/n?”

“Zelda. I NEED to tell you what I just heard!”

A game was now afoot.

And your opponents weren’t finished yet either.

#zelda spellman #zelda spellman x reader #caos #Sabrina #lgbt #fanfic #hilda spellman #sabrina spellman #ambrose spellman #chilling adventures of sabrina #miranda otto #caos imagine #wlw #caos fanfiction #your pov

[1025cherrystreet]

New Home for the Holidays!

happy holidays! and merry christmas to whoever celebrates it!! <3

disclaimer: kinda scared ngl, this is my first piece of writing i’m putting on tumblr. i usually use wattpad (my username is the same it is here if you wanna follow me!), so i’m still learning how to do this lmao. hope you like it! any feedback is appreciated!!!

also... i didn’t really proofread this bc i got impatient and wanted to post it before christmas lol :)

warnings: none, just fluff ;)

gf!y/n spends christmas with harry and his family.

You hear the faint chime of the doorbell ringing from inside the house as you nervously pick at your fingers down at your side. Harry notices the small action, quickly taking your hand to intertwine with his, shooting you a small smile in hopes to calm your nerves.

And it does. For a moment. Until the door swings open and Anne appears on the other side. What finally does put your anxiety to rest is the big, warm hug she pulls you into, a splitting grin adorning her face. You chuckle in surprise (mostly at the fact she hugged you first and not her own son), but return the kind action, nonetheless.

"Oh my gosh! Y/N, my dear, you look gorgeous as always!" She says pulling back just enough to look at your face.

"Thank you! You're looking quite good yourself, Mrs. Twist." You return either a kind smile.

"Oh, none of that. I've told you before, call me Anne," She looks at you with a knowing and playful scowl, waving you off.

"Wow, hello to you too mum," Harry mutters from next to you, plastering a fake pout on his lips.

She softly scoffs, releasing her hold on you and moving to embrace her son.

"You look gorgeous too, Harry. Is that what you wanted to hear?" She jokes, the familiar smirk she holds reminds you of the one your boyfriend pulls so frequently.

When they release from their tight squeeze, Anne steps inside and holds the door open before speaking.

"Well... Don't want you two to freeze out there, come in! I was just fixing a cuppa,"

The warmth of her home heats your frozen fingertips as you enter and your glad to be out of the snow. You love the snow, but since growing up not experiencing it often where you lived makes it a little hard to bear in times like these. You couldn't remember many times you've had a white Christmas before (probably could count on one hand, if your honest), but you've always remembered them being the best ones.

You've always loved the holidays. You loved the cold weather and the time with family. You loved you're yearly family tradition of opening one present on Christmas Eve night and taking a picture on the staircase in your childhood home the next morning. You loved making hot chocolate and watching you're family open the presents you got them.

You loved the holidays. But, what you love more than anything, is that this year you get to spend them with Harry.

You've been dating for two years now, but last Christmas, you spent it with your own family, as did he, because it was a bit too soon in y'all's relationship to make that step. However, this year Harry extended the invitation for you to join them and after talking with your parents (and your brother, albeit he didn't care one bit) you accepted the invite. Of course, not without making sure you wouldn't be imposing at all. And with Harry's reassuring words of, wouldn't have asked if we all didn't want you there, and besides, baby, it wouldn't be Christmas without all my loved ones, would it?, you started packing for London.

Harry shrugs off his coat as you both stand in the foyer and you follow suit as a voice shouts from the kitchen.

"Are they here?" A familiar sister calls out excitedly.

You and Harry enter the kitchen and he's immediately pulling Gemma into a bear hug. You look at the sight and smile fondly, noticing her boyfriend, Michal, behind them, but not before worrying for Gemma's breath support as Harry noticeably squeezes tighter.

They let go of each other and she playfully scowls at him, swatting his arm. To which Harry dramatically holds his arm, draining an, ow, that hurt!, receiving an eye roll from Gemma before Harry moves to greet Michal, and his stepdad, Robin.

"Hi, Y/N! It's so great to see you, feels like it's been ages," She greets you in turn, having enough of Harry's antics already. You return the greeting, along with the one to Michal and Robin, and before you know it, you're all deep into conversation.

Harry takes up spot right on your side like a leech. If you were being honest, it took you awhile to become accustomed and comfortable to how openly affectionate Harry is with you in front of his family and friends. At first, it was just small touches and light squeezes when the two of you would go out with Mitch and Sarah. The actions not bold enough for you to scold him, but just enough to make your cheeks turn pink. Not long after, the touches turned into sweet kisses to your cheek and draping a protective arm around you almost every time y'all went out. Which wasn't a problem until you realized how many stares your friends shot you when you started to get too comfortable in his warm embrace, most of the time opting to daze out in Harry's comfort than pay attention to conversation. So then, when the little affections turned into koala-esque cuddling into your side and planting heart-stopping kisses to your lips in front of Gemma and Anne this past summer, you decided to tell him to reign it back just a tad. It wasn't that you didn't like it! Quite the contrary, the sweet scent of his cologne that would flood your senses as he settled so close to you made your head fuzzy, and the pecks along your neck or on your hands or on your cheeks left you incapable of being present.

Of course, your loving boyfriend pouted a bit at the fact he claims, you don't want my kisses, but quickly got over it when you dropped to your knees before the boy to press kisses somewhere he couldn't complain about.

However, despite all of your protests to PDA, you can't help but relinquish your resolve as you melt into the couch with Harry between your legs, head resting on your tummy. The whole family (which includes you now!) is settled into their comfy spots in Anne's living room as Miracle on 34th Street plays on the TV, everyone having changed into their fuzziest Christmas pajamas. The realization when you saw Harry, Gem, and Anne had matching pajama bottoms made your heart grow tenfold and your eyes glaze over in complete fondness.

The smell of kettle corn popcorn (as Harry made it since he knows it's your favorite) and cinnamon candles fill the room. Anne and Robin are together on the couch perpendicular to yours against the wall opposite of you and Harry as the two of you are laid out taking up the whole space on y'all's blue sofa, while Gemma and Michal have cuddled up on the floor, sharing the big bean bag off to your left since they were the last ones to join the holiday movie marathon.

You love the dynamic of Harry's family. Much different than the chaotic mess of yours, and although you still love your family very much (despite their constant need to be obnoxiously loud for no reason whatsoever, fight over little things, and ignore each other on a daily basis), you admire how calm their presence is. You're family is just so... loud. And that's not necessarily a bad thing! The running joke of your family is that no one in it is capable of whispering...well, except you but you all blame it on the anxiety. But even so, your parents and brother have always argued. Over everything. Very rarely is it about something important, and seldom does it get out of control, but your family's way of showing affection is very...unique? Y'all aren't openly nice and polite all the time. As confusing as it might sound, y'all show your love in bickering. The love is more underlying than it is direct in show.

But that's why you can't get over how quiet this house is right now. Not one fight over someone breathing wrong has broke out and Harry and Gemma actually get along and enjoy each other's company. They're like... friends! The concept is crazy to you and you can't help but get just a tad bummed how your family doesn't just sit around all cuddled up, and how they'll get something for you while their up so you don't have to move from your comfy spot, or how Anne will just hug Harry out of nowhere. But the more you think about it, you realize that it's probably because Harry wasn't around much, always touring and traveling the world. He never got the time to playfully bicker with his family. So, as everyone is quiet in their comfort, you take it all in, happy that you're given the chance to experience their household dynamic.

Your fingers play with Harry's hair, running them through the long brown curls, still as wonderstruck at how soft his hair is as ever. Hearing him softly hum when you gently tug through a thicker curl.

"You're so effortlessly beautiful, ya know that?" You whisper to him, the sound of the movie, thankfully, covering you're affection from everyone else.

You can just spot the smitten little grin that grows on his face, and despite not having the angle to see, you just know his precious dimple is making a showcase right now...and that's enough to put a smile on your own face.

Instead of replying in words, he only turns his head to place a soft, melting kiss upon your thigh. Making heat surge through your entire body, in turn, making your heart warm at his love.

As y'all sit and watch the movie, you start to subconsciously braid your boyfriends hair. Starting by sectioning (albeit, a bit lazily) his hair into two big chunks, then separating three strands from the top of his head, you start braiding the pieces, adding a bit more hair as you go. He eventually caught on to what you were doing and you thought he was going to stop you, truthfully. But to your surprise, he only started rubbing gentle circles into your legs with his hands in a calming manner, causing you to release a content sigh.

When you get to the end, you tie off the finished braid with a hair tie from your wrist before moving to the other side of his sectioned head. It surprised you how long his braids are! They come down about a few inches below his chin, much longer than the only other time you had saw him in braids, which was when Lou did them right before he went on stage to perform. Now, your braiding skills aren't as refined as Lou's are, her skills making yours look rather sad, but you're having a blast doing it and that's all that matters. Not like he's going to go perform after this, right?

After securing the second braid in a hair tie, you lean forward and place a kiss to the top of Harry's head, causing him to tilt his head to look at you with a big smile on his pretty face.

Since you're sat up already and hovering over his face with him still in your lap, you press a quick, searing kiss to his lips, watching them curve into a splitting grin. You smile back at him, just admiring his features.

Despite being able to feel the loving stares from Gemma and Anne in the room, your focus is still on Harry.

“I love you,” He whispers, bringing a hand up to gently stroke your cheek.

“I love you too, bubs.” You return, because you do. You love him so much it hurts sometimes.

Looking at him now, surrounded by his family, you think you have never been so happy in your entire life. You’re so lucky to have him in your life, and you know he knows he’s lucky too.

But most of all, you’re so glad you decided to spend this Christmas with him.

#harry styles #harry styles fluff #fine line #hshq #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fic #harry styles christmas #christmas #holidays #fluff #reader insert #writing #fanfic #one direction #long haired harry #anne twist #gemma styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n #1025cherrystreet

[carewyncromwell]

5, 13, and 20 for the potter asks?

Pro or anti Marauders?

Pro overall, but let’s break this down by characters --

Remus Lupin is my favorite male character in the entire book series. He not only reminded me of my best teachers growing up, but I felt so, so much for him as a character too. I always felt kind of marginalized and different from my peers growing up, so it’s kind of unsurprising that I’ve had a soft spot for “outcast” characters since I was very little, and Remus is no exception. I completely understood why his friends meant so much to him and therefore felt SO much for him that, in the end, he had to lose all three of them and end up alone. Even his flaws, showcased best in the Snape’s Worst Memory chapter of OOTP and especially in Deathly Hallows, only serve to make him more real and human -- it broke my heart when he considered leaving Tonks and Teddy to help the Trio with their Horcrux hunt, but Remus wanting to “bury himself in his work” (which, honestly, this was -- he was a member of the Order, after all!) rather than face his worst fear of possibly dooming another person (namely, his son) to live a life like his made perfect sense with the characterization established, however horrible and wrong of a choice it was. It made me side with Harry so much in scolding Remus, yet I also felt compassion for the feelings behind Remus’s initial impulse. And of course, I was so proud of him when he overcame that fear and stood by Tonks and got to know his son before he died. I’m still not over the fact that my bb Remus had to die, AUUUUUGH, he and Sirius and Harry should’ve lived together as one happy makeshift family togetherrrrr. DX

Peter Pettigrew...that bloody rat. >> I’m sure just about everyone feels a lot of justified resentment toward Peter for what he did to the Potters, and I definitely agree with that sentiment...but at the same time, there’s still a part of me that finds him very interesting. Mainly because...I’d love to see him at his best, now that we’ve seen him at his worst! He was a Marauder, same as Sirius, Remus, and James, and we should never forget that -- he might have been a bit of a tag-along, but none of the other three, Lily, or anyone else thought that Peter would ever have been the type to turn on his friends. McGonagall disparaged Peter for his magical talent, but she openly grieved for him when she thought Sirius had killed him. Everyone was ready to believe Sirius -- who clearly adored James -- could be the traitor, before suspecting Peter. Sirius even suspected Remus before Peter...and this is when their connection in the books is so strong that HP fans have shipped Wolfstar since POA was first published back in 1999! Even when you read the books, you can see flickers of remorse in Peter at points, if you’re reading carefully. In Goblet of Fire, Peter seems noticeably uncomfortable around the rest of Voldemort’s supporters -- his efforts to bring Voldemort back to his body really seem to be out of obligation rather than any kind of enthusiasm. And of course, as we see in Deathly Hallows, Peter even as a Death Eater still retains enough honor to hesitate when Harry reminds him that he owes him his life. Gryffindor house does preach chivalry as well as courage, and in a twisted way, one could read Peter’s “loyalty” to Voldemort not just being about desperation as his friends now want nothing to do with him, but also because Peter’s standing by the choice he made...not unlike how Percy stood by the Ministry as long as he did, rather than by his family. This doesn’t justify what Peter did at all -- he is a despicable coward who destroyed so many lives and is responsible for bringing back the Dark Wizard whose return resulted in even more deaths -- but it does give his characterization as a villain interesting nuance. There’s a well-established internal logic to how Peter behaves, one I would frankly LOVE to see more of in a future Marauders-centric property.

Sirius is arguably the most polarizing of the Marauders, but honestly? I love him to pieces. He is a very, VERY flawed character -- he’s got a real mean streak, a hot temper, and more aggression than the average person. Him encouraging Snape to “go after Remus” was an indisputably terrible, stupid, callous thing to do, not just because of the endangerment to Snape’s life, but the flagrant betrayal of Remus’s friendship. The way Sirius treated Kreacher was completely uncalled for, regardless of how much the elf reminded him of his terrible home life. Sirius also can be really immature and can get really surly and passive-aggressive when he’s upset. But despite all of this, I love Sirius anyway. In a lot of ways, Sirius reminds me of my father, who I also love a lot despite his many flaws. Sirius lacks empathy for those different from him, but he’s also the only member of his immediate family who rejected the idea of pureblood superiority and fought in the Order of the Phoenix against Voldemort. Sirius was a bully and even as an adult could be incredibly petty and mean-spirited, but he also was the first person in Harry’s life who really felt like family to him -- who he could write to for help when he was sad, afraid, or insecure. Sirius was a hot-tempered, rash person who rarely thought through the consequences of his actions, but he also would’ve done absolutely anything to protect the people he loved. He without question loved James, Lily, and Harry more than his own life. Despite being raised in a cold, hate-filled, prejudiced, unaffectionate, abusive home, Sirius understood unconditional love, and he understood his godson in a way no one else could, not just because he was such close friends with the parents he’d lost at such a young age, but because he’d lived Harry’s experience as a neglected, unloved child himself.

And now we come to the often maligned James Potter. Honestly, this guy gets such a bad rap in the fandom, almost exclusively based on Snape’s memories, and I don’t think it’s really fair. Snape is really the only person who has a sour image of James, and even if we disregard the testimonials of fellow Marauders like Sirius and Remus, people like McGonagall, Dumbledore, Mad-Eye Moody, and even Cornelius Fudge had nothing but nice things to say about James, and those people don’t have reason to speak well of James at Snape’s expense. And of course, even Snape’s perceptions are bound to have their own slant to them. Pensieve memories are just that: memories. A Pensieve is not a pocket dimension that perfectly recreates the past, hence why Slughorn was able to badly modify his memory, Hokey the house elf’s memories were tampered with by Riddle, and even in Snape’s own memory, we follow Snape throughout the memory and we’re only able to hear what the Marauders are saying because he was close by. And if we judge James solely based on his no-doubt worst moment in Snape’s Worst Memory, we’re bound to get an incomplete picture -- just as we did for Hagrid, after seeing Tom Riddle’s memory of him confronting Hagrid for supposedly opening the Chamber of Secrets. Would we judge Harry solely for Malfoy’s recollection of the Sectumsempra incident, or Hermione solely for Marietta’s recollection of the time Hermione hexed her face to read “SNEAK” across it? Of course not. James was a bully and what he did in Snape’s Worst Memory was no doubt horrible -- but this is also a young man who without hesitation gave Sirius a home after he ran away from his terrible family, who supported Remus financially when he couldn’t find work, and who selflessly put himself between Voldemort and his family just to give them a chance to escape, even though he didn’t even have his wand on him. I would frankly love to learn more about James and see more of the arc he must’ve gone through as a character for someone like Lily to have fallen in love with him and for people like Remus and Sirius to feel such strong platonic love for him themselves, if a Marauders-centric property was ever created.

Who was the bravest character in Harry Potter and why?

Oh gosh...hm...that is a real challenge. There are a lot of very brave characters! Harry, Ron, Hermione, Remus, Sirius, McGonagall, Hagrid, Dobby, Cedric...but I think I’m going to nominate Neville. While Hogwarts was taken over by Snape and the Carrows and the students were no doubt being brainwashed a la the Hitler Youth to regurgitate blood-purist talking points rather than learning anything that could defend themselves against the Dark Arts or that was even remotely true about Muggles, Neville decided to face that undeniable hopelessness -- worsened all the more by the students’ lack of independence and freedom while being housed in the castle’s walls without their families and the threat of losing both their families and all hope for a future constantly dangled over their heads -- head-on and reform Dumbledore’s Army with Ginny and Luna to stand against it. Then, even as his group’s members got picked off one by one and were forced to hide in the Room of Requirement, he stuck to his guns and kept resisting because he knew -- as a Pureblood -- he was in a position he could use to fight for others and wasn’t afraid to stand up for those who couldn’t stand up for themselves and others. It was only when his grandmother was forced to flee and the Carrows realized that Neville was too much of a threat to keep in check that he went into hiding himself. Then, when everyone thought Harry was dead and many others would’ve despaired, Neville fearlessly and fiercely stuck both by Harry, his parents’ memory, and his own convictions and refused Voldemort’s offer to join him, even keeping his head enough after getting burned by the flaming Sorting Hat to fulfill his promise to Harry and kill Nagini. And this was the kid who people said shouldn’t have been Sorted into Gryffindor at all, in his first year! What a beautiful transformation.

Favourite Death Eater?

*cringes* Mmm...well, character-wise, I’d say I’ve always found Lucius a very compelling character, in the books. The Malfoy family in general struck me as interesting anti-villains, since they are indisputably unpleasant, prejudiced, awful people, but their one silver lining to me is how deeply and sincerely they love each other. That aspect is really lost in movie!Lucius, since the films try to portray him much more two-dimensionally bad and that interpretation has since colored the fandom’s view of Lucius as an abusive father when there is NO textual evidence of that in the books. And I kind of find it a shame, because as much as I adore Jason Isaacs in his role, it did serve to make Lucius a bit less complex and interesting in the films than he was in the books. Admittedly as well I have a bit more of a soft spot for Lucius after taking on the challenge of writing the guy and his family a redemption arc in my way-too-long AU fic Harry Potter and the Lack of Lamb Sauce. XD

HP Ask!

#hp ask #opinion #ooc #lucius malfoy #sirius black #remus lupin #james potter #peter pettigrew #neville longbottom

[kitmon]

Keys Are Under the Mat {3/?}

Llewyn Davis x OC

Summary: Struggling singer/songwriter, Llewyn Davis, has faced the rough and tumble world of the music industry as well as the callous hand of life. When an up-and-coming folk singer makes a trip back home and finds herself at the hands of the battered down couch-surfer, her first thought is to offer him a bit of compassion.

Warnings: Cursing, sexual themes, themes of depression

The magnificent structure stood tall on a street corner within the heart of Greenwich Village. It held a lovely charm of something that’s lived for so long. The red tint of its brick-lined walls having been stained with the countless snow and rainstorms it’s endured but it only reminded those that looked upon it that it was a feat of structural genius plucked from the imagination of architect, Emery Roth. It was one of the reasons, she’d chosen it.

The Devonshire House was home to the wealthy and elite with sizable apartments and little English touches that she found herself enamored with after being surrounded by buildings just like it during her small trip to London in the spring. It was home for now, or at least until she was sent to another state or another country by her manager. But that was something to consider at a later point in time. Now, all she could find herself thinking on was how much she’d enjoy getting out of the powdery streets of New York and into her condo, where chamomile tea lay nestled somewhere in her cupboards waiting for her.

James came around to her door and opened it. He offered his hand for her and she took it, the soft cashmere of her glove fitting nicely into the beaten leather of his own. She took a prudent step onto the crunchy layer of ice that encased the sidewalk, James keeping close watch of her movements. Once she was steady he made his way to the trunk and unlocked it, pulling out her guitar case with ease. She was next to him in an instant, reaching out to take the case, but his hands inched away, keeping it just barely out of her reach.

“James?” She questions, looking up to find the subtle crease in his brow and the attentive sheen in his eyes.

“Let me carry this for you, Dotty,” he insisted, but she saw right through to the bottom of his shallow actions and knew right then that his intentions weren’t all too pure. Any other day she’d let him accompany her on the short trip to her apartment, but now that he was only trying to interfere with her guest, she’d have none of it.

“Oh, I’m sure I can carry it, James,” she persisted, reaching the rest of the way to grip the handle as James let it slip from his fingers, knowing not to fight her on these things. “It’s only a short walk through the lobby.”

His frown reflected his distaste, but he let her do as she pleased. She held a tight grip on her case as she moved to walk towards the front doors, where the misfortunate doorman stood at its side, snow dusting his shoulders and his cap. But before she could take a step, James caught her hand with a soft grip, not enough to really stop her but just enough to let her understand that what he was saying was urgent.

She turned her head down to look at his hold that had traveled further down, now grasping onto her hand. A flurry of puzzlement invading her senses as her sight flitted onto his shaking eyes.

“Stay safe, Dotty.” He pleaded, the poor quiver in his well-built hand bringing her back to the reality of the situation; the effect it had on others. Her eyes softened, and she plopped the guitar case into the snow, reaching for the hand that held hers and giving it a reassuring squeeze with both of her own. She lifted it up towards her before placing a soft kiss on his knuckles. He really is patient with her and she appreciates his sticking by her side. Lord knows how many times she thought he wouldn’t.

“There’s nothing to worry about, James,” she coos, running her thumb over his sharp knuckles that bloomed with the heat at her touch. His chin tucked itself into his chest as his head dropped and his hand planted itself on his hip in exasperation. He let out a brittle chuckle as his head rocked at the absurdity of it all.

“Jesus, Dorothy, you’re—,” his breath lay caught in his throat, not sure of what to say or what to do. His hand splayed over his forehead, trying to reach for the words.

“An idiot?” She offers, a wide grin inching its way up her features. “You can call me an idiot, James, I know that’s what you’re thinking,” she giggles, watching as his face unwound from the tightly woven distress he wore before into a broad smile that twinkled with the lights of the buzzing village around them.

“You’re not an idiot, Dotty,” the smile still present on him but his words were all resolute. “Just... dewy-eyed.”

“You trust too much in others.” His face turned pensive, now matching the solemn words he spoke. “One of these days these people’ll stomp on your fire, they’ll put you out.”

“You worry too much.” She patted the hand that ceased its quivering and was still cradled in her own. She brought her own to his strong chin, caressing it in assurance. The sharp stubble on his chin tickling the pad of her thumb.

She sent him off when the cold nipped at her nose and the snow began to seep into her boots, reminding her of how much warmer it’d be inside. She was sure her company wouldn’t mind the thought of it as he trembled under the umbrellaed visor that loomed over the entrance of the building, grasping for any kind of warmth as he waited on her.

They entered the large and spacious lobby, bringing a gust of chilly night air that swept across the floor and caused a chill to prickle at their skin. The checker-tiled floor was damp with the snow that clung onto travelers' feet even after wiping them at the door. The warmth and the wafting scents of early winter encased them as they stepped through to the elevator; smells of gingerbread and cinnamon gluing themselves to their heavy coats. She remains silent but her eyes shrink when her smile widens to wiggle her fingers at the lady occupying the front desk; Rachel, her name tag boasted. And the older man standing guard at the elevator watched with glee as his favorite resident stepped forward, offering this drear and heady day some sunlight in the form her kindness.

“Good evening, Henri,” she greets sweetly with closed eyes and an acknowledging lilt of her head.

“Good evening, Dotty,” he speaks, the remnants of a French accent lacing his words as his eyes filled with warmth, adoration as if looking at his own daughter.

“How’s Pepper? Poor thing still recovering from her cold?” She chances at small talk as Llewyn occupies her side, hands stuffed inside the eaten-away-at satin pockets of his blazer. He listens in on the conversation between friends as he looked up and around the box. Nothing all too new, similar to the one in the Gorfien’s complex he thinks.

“Oh, yes, she’s doing well,” he reassures, catching Llewyn’s ear as he does. “S’been reading a lot. Just finished a science-fiction novel. Never read one myself but I might give it a try the way she’s been raving ‘bout it.”

“I’ll have to lend you one sometime,” she offers, grasping onto the handle of her case with both hands in front of her as the elevator lets out a resounding ding at reaching her floor.

The dense metal doors slid wide open, showcasing a broad hall, decorated with simple vases holding lovely arrangements of purple hydrangeas, guelder roses, and dahlias all of which complemented the eggshell wash of the walls.

“Tell Pepper I said ‘Hello,’“ she requests, stepping out onto the divine and gleaming hardwood tile, still facing Henri as her steps walked her backward. She gives a final wave goodbye as the doors slid shut and Henri wished her farewell through the fracture between doors.

She spun on her toes to redirect herself forward. The clicks of her chunky heel meeting the tile could be heard against the walls as the two patrons within them remained silent. Llewyn stayed analyzing his surroundings, noting the broadly spaced doors and the high ceilings.

“Pepper is Henri’s wife,” she inserts into the still air, filling Llewyn in on the conversation she could quite easily assume that he was listening in on. “He adores her,” she continues. “Always speaks about how she’s the best thing that’s ever happened to him.”

Llewyn looks away from the polished doorways to find her rubbing her thumb at the worn handle of the guitar case as she daydreams. His lips parted as if he were going to speak, say something to her but the attempt was shunned when she abruptly stopped at the last door on the hall, setting her baggage down and planting her feet on the blue Persian doormat placed just in front of it.

She fiddles with the ring of keys she pulled out of her— to all appearances—bottomless coat pocket. She stuffed the copper key into the hole once she finds it and opens the door. She steps to the side, her back placed along the hard oak allowing him in before her. He takes a step inside and surveys the flat; it was pristine, all clean colors coating the area, and it was reminiscent of the paintings of heaven he’d seen somewhere before. And he had only stepped foot in the foyer.

The welcoming home of a dog bark reverberated off the walls. Bounding around a sharp turn and nearly slipping on the corner of a rug comes a long-snouted dog, large and gaining speed preparing to jump onto Llewyn. His leap caused the musician to stumble back a few feet holding onto the slim limbs of the pup.

“Oh! No, stop that, Beau!” She scolds, turning from her work of locking the door to assist the dog back onto the floor. She holds him close at her side, patting his snow-white locks to steady him.

“I’m sorry, he gets excited when there’re guests,” she explains as the dog stares up at Llewyn, eyes wide and glossy with a happy-go-lucky grin shaping his mouth as he panted in excitement.

Llewyn looked on before he felt the gentle press and rub on his leg. He peeked toward the floor and found a slender grey and white spotted kitty rubbing her side against the rough material of his slacks. Her light fur decorating his grey-toned pants as she maneuvered.

“You’re not allergic, are you?” She questions with concern, lifting herself up from her kneeling position against the pup and making her way to scoop up the fur fiend in her arms. She held the cat like a mother would hold her newborn child while the animal butted it’s sleek head against her owner’s, begging for her attention as her purrs grew louder.

“I’m sure Penelope wouldn't mind spending some time in my room.” The cat continued to fight for her affection, ramming its head into her cheek as she spoke.

“No, no I’m fine,” he watched her interactions with her pets with a skeptical expression, shaking his head to let her know there was no need for any of that. Her head bobbed in understanding, her eyes gazing toward the floor as she subconsciously scratched at Penelope’s chin, much to the kitten's pleasure.

There was a bout of silence that lingered as she set the feline on the floor to roam. She lifted herself and patted her hands at her wool coat to remove the excess white fur from her gloves. She sighs deeply, her body relaxing. She starts to fiddle with the large buttons on her coat, plucking them through the holes then shimmying out of the thick material.

“If you’d like, there’s food all in the pantry and in the fridge.” She nods her head to the left, down another room in the general direction of the kitchen as she steps toward a coatrack. She hangs it up neatly before moving to her gloves, snatching the fabric off of each finger before pulling off the whole garment and placing them in her coat’s pocket.

He followed the nod of her head, leaning forward and looking off to find an expansive kitchen, bright and clean with rows of cupboards and drawers holding ripe fruits and fresh vegetables and grains.

“I’ll go get the first aid kit.” His eyes were yanked back to her toeing off her boots stabilizing her self on a nearby wall, wiggling her toes under her sheer black nylons once they were free. Her feet padded along the floor as she made her way towards the bathroom.

Llewyn watched her tread off before glancing up and down the walls making his way to the plush looking couch he found once turning the corner of the long corridor. He plops himself onto the perfect seat looking out the Georgian style window it was positioned near and onto the bright city lights flickering as the city thrived.

His head jerked when he felt the gentle landing of Penelope on his thigh. He watched as she let her paws wander over the expanse of his lap, searching for the best spot to rest. His mind initially wishes to pick her up and place her on the floor, but once he sees her settling in a comfortable ball he couldn’t find it to disturb her. Resting the hand that lifted in attempts to push her away now landing on her fur, stroking tenderly. Penelope’s purrs of content could be felt as he lifted his head and continued to watch outside.

The alluring sight and sound weren’t expected on Dorothy’s part as she turned the corner, holding a white package and halting her steps to look on for a moment longer. It was a humorous contrast; a big scruffy man nursing a soft and tender kitten in his lap, looking to be enjoying it nonetheless!

“I think Penny likes you,” she states as she steps toward the couple, bringing Llewyn’s attention to her form as she enters. His hand came to a standstill and Penelope lifted her head see the same sight.

His eyebrows puckered and his eyelids came closer in a squint. “What?”

She stepped forward toward an accompanying ottoman. She lifted its side and dragged it across the rug laying it in front of him and plopping herself on the plump material.

“Penelope,” she clarifies, not looking up at him as she flicks the latches open and rummages through the contents of the kit. “She seems to like you.”

“Oh, right, I guess so.” His eyes drifted from her onto Penelope, meeting the feline’s steel eyes that stared up at him. They silently insisted that he continue to brush her and he did, reaching at her head and traveling to the base of her spine.

Dorothy pulls a damp rag that she’d been holding prior and folds it a few times before offering it to his face, asking for permission to continue. With no hesitance on his side, she proceeds to clean at the tarnished skin. Burning red wounds and purple splotches coated his flesh. Luckily for him, there weren’t all too many and although the seriousness of each varied, there wasn’t a need for stitches. But her mind thought it right to at least clean them up.

“So, are you gonna tell me why you were half dead in an alley, or am I just gonna have to leave that to my imagination?” She jested, a smile pulling its way onto her features. An attempt in her part to lighten the mood.

“I was mugged, just my fucking luck,” he laughed humorlessly, wanting to shake his head but her fingers guided it back to where she could reach.

“Yeah, the guy wasn’t all too happy when he found out there wasn’t much to steal.” Her calculative pats ceased their rhythm when the sigh of a sentence left him. It was a subtle change in motion, hardly enough to notice, but it was there. Her emotions taking control for a split second at the sheer desperation in his voice. A voice so gruff, it must have been the subject of hurt too many times. She could only imagine how much shit could have been kicked in his face and how little anybody else could have cared at the moment. She knows it, she’s felt it.

After cleaning all the free blood and grime on his features she packs the little case up and moves to the kitchen. She placed it on the countertop and turned to pull open the freezer door, the frigid air hitting her as her hand reached in and brought back out an ice tray. She kicked the door closed with her elbow and set the tray on the opposite counter. In a graceful manner, having navigated the kitchen many times, she pulls at a drawer choosing a small dishrag and closing it with a thump. She popped a few cubes from the tray and placed them in the rag, folding it to hold them securely. She walked it back to the living room and leaned down to reach Llewyn’s line of sight. Her hand reached to press it against the bruise over his eye but quit when she realized that he could handle it, there was no need to mother him she figured. She instead opted for offering it in the palm of her hand.

“Here,” she encouraged. Llewyn meeting her eyes and reaching to take the package. Her hand pointed to the discolored mark that had started to swell as she continued. “Leave that on for a while, it’ll still be bruised but it’ll stop the swelling.” He offered a grateful nod, albeit short as he applies the needed pressure holding in the sharp grunt that wanted to escape. Her eyes roved over his beaten build, and she continued to repress the urge to overstep boundaries and coddle him. But her resolve won as she impelled her hands up and off her knees to stand straight and head for her bedroom.

Her bare feet peeked out of her door as she inched it open, revealing herself with dampened hair all ruffled and sticking out from when she tossled it with a towel. She was already snuggled up in striped pajamas that her figure drowned in. The sleeves reached the tips of her fingers and the fabric of the pants pooled at her feet.

After brushing her short locks into place and putting rogue streaks of hair back where they belong, she set the comb haphazardly onto a countertop; it was a common trait that often led to the displacement of many items. She took creeping steps towards the living area to peek inside. The television’s screen was pitch black as he made no use of it and the whole room stood still. There was no record on the turntable and no upturned knobs on the radio, rendering the room silent. He just sat, and stared out the window, twiddling at Penelope’s fur.

She felt intrusive when she stepped into his quiet place, a scoundrel plank of wood creaking when she took a step. Her head lifted to find him staring up at her, offering a sheepish smile as an apology for her trespassing. She stood straight and clasped her hands in front of her, pulling at the sleeve of her sleepwear as she offered the bathroom to him, pointing down the hall to make it clear. He nodded and lifted Penelope out of his lap and set her onto the floor. His frame stalked towards Dorothy as she held his stare, mouth sealed shut as to not make a peep. When he stepped beside her and continued to watch her face, holding his position yet saying nothing, the tension rose. Her head hung, cutting that thickening line, and she smiled to herself, the red racing up her neck and spreading along her flushed cheeks.

He watched her shuffle before walking down the hall.

The guest room she introduced him to was a standard size with a queen-sized bed placed along a wall. It was all furnished and decorated to fit the home, but it held its own touches unique unto itself.

He wasn’t presented this luxury very often, usually taking advantage of Jim and Jean’s raggedy couch or the Gorfien’s slight upgrade of a not-so-raggedy couch. He even offered taking rest on her own but she insisted that there was no need. It was a three-room condo, with a single resident and her pets, all other rooms were left untouched unless she had visitors which wasn’t very frequent. There wasn’t any point in letting the opportunity pass only to have the room collect more dust.

As he stepped inside, she continued to stand at the threshold, watching his eyes scan the room as they ultimately fell onto the bed.

In the bathroom, he pulled his clothes back on, opting to sleep in his tattered t-shirt and his wrinkled slacks. But on the nearly made bedspread lay a brand new shirt and folded just underneath was a pair of flannel pajama pants to keep him warm as she knew the window would let in peeks of air from time to time. She doesn’t say anything about the gesture and neither does he. He only takes it in his hands and feels over the material, holding in his mind the joy that overflows. But he looks at her, shirt still in hand as he thanked her with the dull gleam in his eye.

Her lips upturned slightly and she turned her head to the side, averting his solemn gaze.

Turning to walk away, her hand floating over the door frame as she turned, only tightening slightly when she halts. She curses her awful memory before retracing her steps, placing her back in the middle of the threshold ready to give him some information she left out.

“I’ll be gone early tomorrow, there’s food all in the cupboards so you can help yourself, and if you leave, go ahead and lock the door,” she finishes, her words holding a nonchalance to them, sleep already taking over. He nods his head and turns back to pulling at the tight tuck of the sheet wedged under the corner of the mattress. She gives a nod of the head as well, and once again tries to step away before another memo invaded her action.

“Oh, also, one more thing,” she chirps. “If you need to come back, there’s a spare key under the mat.” It’s a subtle offer, given for unknown intentions on her part. She wasn’t sure why but she enjoyed his company, the thought of coming home to someone other than Beau and Penelope, but he didn’t have to know that.

She leaves, her hand ultimately slipping from the doorframe it had been resting on and falling to her side.

“Hey,” he calls, taking a step to catch her before she was out of war shot. “Thanks, for all of this, it’s really... look, you didn’t have to—“

“I know,” she interrupts with a smile, “but I wanted to.”

She switches off the hall light with a flick and hollers a good night. She wrangles her pets, luring them in with sweet calls as they follow into her room. Beau saunters toward their shared bed, Penelope already cuddled up in the comforter until Beau leaps on as well and shakes her up.

Dorothy watched in amusement as she brought the door in. It closed with a click but her hand lingered on the handle, eyeing it. Her fingers floated over the lock, debating on her next choice, ultimately deciding on switching it with the sharp turn of her wrist. The room was secure and she was safe in that knowledge.

She trudged herself to her little nest, lifting the covers and cozying herself in the company of her pets, surrendering to her exhaustion.

Taglist:

@rosemarysbaby13

#inside llewyn davis #llewyn davis #llewyn davis x oc #llewyn davis x reader #fan fiction #film #movie #folk music #writer #writing #keys are under the mat #oscar isaac #fanfic #llewyn davis x y/n #llewyn davis x you #llewyn davis fanfiction #llewyn davis imagine #ll

[eloquated]

modern Kili & Elladan, @murkhith

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:02:34 PM

"Alright.. something beautiful... Beautiful..."  The university grounds weren't exactly Elladan's idea of ethereally lovely.  Oh sure they were nice, manicured and well maintained-- but ethereal?  Not so much.  Not to mention, Professor Kerrigan wasn't going to take "Oh, I didn't know the definition of the word, sorry!" as an excuse for a poor photo.

Which was precisely how Elladan had found himself in the woods at the edge of town, his camera bag at his side, as the late afternoon sunlight glowed through the dappled leaves.  Surely there had to be something ethereal out there!

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:06:52 PM

"Of all the fucking words to pick as a topic..." Kili grumbled as he stumbled over the slippery rocks, sheltering his eyes from the sun. He had agreed to take the class because he enjoyed photography, but it also gave him some extra points he needed.

But ethereal?

While stuck thinking about the topic, Fili had reminded him of the nearby forest and the small pond that laid in the middle of it so here he was, waving away mosquitos in hopes of finding something that stood out.

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:10:46 PM

Ethereal, talk about a loaded word!  It brought to mind fantasy, and diaphanous veils, and gauzy, soft lighting.  Nothing that he had readily on hand!  "That's the point though... It's meant to be a challenge.  Think outside the box."  Which didn't make it any easier!

And ethereal definitely didn't come with a side of blood sucking flies!  For the dozenth time, Elladan scratched the back of his neck, trying to swat away the mosquitoes that kept buzzing around his ears.  "Right.. Ethereal can wait a minute."  He said to himself and shucked down his bag.  Snapping the elastic from his wrist, Elladan reached back to start braiding his long, black hair.  Anything to give the mosquitoes less place to hide!

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:14:05 PM

He had reached for his camera without any conscious thought. Finding someone else in the forest wasn't that big of a surprise, but the way the man stood tall and elegant, his eyes half lidded and long fingers slipping through that dark hair while the sun filtered through the green leaves certainly was.

Kili found himself enchanted and he lifted the camera, focused on the right angle and took the picture. The sound of the shutter was loud in the silence and the other froze, his mind screeching halt in panic.

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:16:36 PM

The woods were always filled with sound-- after all, it wasn't that far from the main city, even though it felt more secluded.  But the quick snap-whir of a camera was definitely not a part of the usual birdsong and distant traffic!

Starting with surprise, Elladan looked around, his hands falling to his sides warily.  "Hello?"  He asked after a pause, feeling a bit stupid.  What if nobody was there?

Well, then there would be nobody to hear him!  It was fine.  Totally fine.

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:19:11 PM

Back pressed against the tree, Kili counted to five before sneaking away as quick and quiet as he could. His heart was hammering in his chest as he ran through the forest, yet he couldn't help but grin in victory. This was exactly the kind of picture he had been searching for. He didn't know who the man had been, but he thanked them in his mind.

Surely his professor and others could appreciate the picture when it came the time to showcase them. 

Yet he couldn't shake off the feeling of familiarity, as if he had seen them somewhere before.

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:23:14 PM

Elladan listened closely, holding his breath and ignoring the rapid thump of his heart.  For a few long moments there was... Birds.  Distant traffic.  The rustle of something in the underbrush.  "And I'm an idiot."  He told himself with a huff of relieved amusement, "Good job, you're three blocks from a mall, and you still managed to freak yourself out.  Elrohir is never going to let you live this one down!"

Clearly there wasn't going to be any inspiration here today!  And after a little more wandering, and a few shots that were possibly half decent (if not amazing)  Elladan packed away his things and started back towards his apartment.  Maybe if he put a good spin on one of his pictures it would be enough to pass muster!

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:27:03 PM

There were quite the few pictures of nature shown in the class the following week. Some of them were amazing, like a shot of two birds in middle of their mating dance and then there were couple of really horrible ones where the students clearly hadn't made any effort.

But no one had taken a picture of another human.

So when his chosen photo was blown out on the large screen, Kili felt nervous but he couldn't help but admire the picture once again. There truly was something special about it. It almost seemed like this person had walked right out of a fantasy movie.

It took him a while to realise the giggles and whispers of his classmates, and once he turned to see what the fuss was all about he spotted the very person from his image sitting in the class.

And at that moment Kili hoped the floor would open up and swallow him whole as his face heat up and turned a remarkable shade of red and his mouth fell open.

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:31:52 PM

Tree.  Tree.  Bird.  Water.  Tree.  Flower.  Elladan watched his own picture slide through somewhere in the middle of the collection-- neither amazing, nor terrible, and ultimately pretty forgettable.  

He was only half paying attention to the images (you could only see so many half composed images of leaves before they all started to look the same!) when he suddenly found himself facing himself.  Blown up twice lifesize and -- the forest! That day in the forest, there had been someone else!

Elladan's grey eyes widened comically, and he could feel his face burning-- oh, it was one thing to put himself on film looking silly, but this? This was... "Oh fuck."  He said under his breath, looking around the class to see who could have, would have, taken that picture?!

It wasn't hard.  Just follow the laughing, and the stares.

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:34:50 PM

Kili's face was buried in his hands, and he struggled between running away or having a full-blown panic attack. He wasn't an easy person to get flustered as he usually was always ready with comebacks but this was a situation from his worst nightmares and there was no way of waking up.

He could feel the piercing stare on the back of his head, and he reluctantly turned to meet the eyes of the person he had secretly photographed.

"... Not my fault you looked like some kind of elf back there."

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:39:25 PM

Elladan blinked at the comment, caught entirely wrongfooted!  He wasn't sure if he was upset about the whole thing-- maybe the other man shouldn't have just snapped his photo and ran, but was it actually offensive?  That was a question he was going to have to ask himself when the sheer, blindsided surprise had worn off!

The classroom was dark, only illuminated by the projected images still sliding by-- tree, tree, bird, tree-- and Elladan could only make out dark hair and the glint off the guy's glasses.  

Elladan huffed a startled laugh, and tried to flash the guy a face-saving smile, "I guess I'd rather be an elf than an orc?"

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:42:52 PM

Oh thank god, the guy wasn't ready to tear his face off yet.

Kili's shoulders sagged with relief and he chuckled quietly, rubbing the back of his neck in a nervous gesture. "I thought you looked familiar but I didn't think we were sharing a class."

The teacher hushed them with a stern stare, so Kili ripped out a page of the notebook and wrote on it instead.

"seriously though, I'm sorry. Promise I'm not a creep."

He then folded it and once the teacher turned around to fiddle with the machine, he threw it by the guy's feet.

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:47:56 PM

Elladan caught the flash of paper as it sailed through the air, and stretched out his foot to catch it under his sneaker before it slid off the edge of the row.  Usually photography was one of his favourite classes, but today the clock couldn't seem to hurry by fast enough!

Unfolding the note, he tried to check a smile at the scribbled apology-- and maybe he should be pissed, but.. He wasn't.  And it didn't seem worth the effort to pretend he was.  

For the rest of the class, Elladan pretended to watch the slides, when really he was watching the clock, the door, the back the guy's head, the clock, the door.. And back to the beginning again, restlessly tapping his fingers on the edge of the note.

When at last the bell chimed, Elladan bolted out of his seat.  Instead of walking around, he slid sideways between the two seats ahead of him, and the two ahead of that, until he could lightly tap the mystery photographer's shoulder.

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:51:12 PM

Kili would forever deny the high-pitched squeak that left his lips as soon as he felt the tap on his shoulder, his eyes wide as he spun around to meet the guy he had photographed. His plan to run out of the class as soon as the bell rang had failed, and now he had to face the responsibility of his action.

And up close, the man was even more attractive than he had thought. Clearly, the settings of the forest only enhanced the man's natural beauty and wow, wasn't that a weird thought. 

Nervously fixing the position of his glasses, Kili offered the guy a slight smile. "Is this the moment you punch me for acting like a creep?"

eloquated4/18/2020, 3:55:43 PM

It was almost blinding when the lights came back up, and Elladan had to blink for a second to clear the white flashes that floated in front of his eyes.  When they did?  Oh... 

The dark hadn't done his mystery photographer any favours.

"I... Nope."  He swallowed, feeling properly gobsmacked for the second time in less than an hour.  Elladan didn't usually go around looking for cute men, but the glasses, and those dark curls, and that half smile did something to his stomach that could only be described (in the most humiliating terms) as fluttery.

"No, no!"  He added in a rush, giving himself a shake, "No, I'm not going to punch you. Why would I do that?"

As soon as the words left his mouth, he could see exactly why he might be afraid of that.  How many homophobic meatheads went to their school?  "I promise, I'm not."

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 3:59:14 PM

"That's a relief," Kili laughed relieved, starting to pack up his things in the blue bag. "I mean if I were in your position, I'd be confused as well but I promise that's the only photo I took of you."

He grinned, slinging the bag over his shoulder. Now that he was sure he wasn't getting punched or yelled at, he was slowly recovering to his usual humor. 

"I guess in a way, I should be thanking you. You made my assignment really fucking easy."

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:04:03 PM

The problem with being pale as Hell was that you blushed.  Like mad.  And it was immediately and obviously visible to anything in a thousand foot radius.  Like right now, and he could feel the heat creeping up his cheeks, making him even more aware of it.

"I thought I heard someone, but I figured it was some creepy stalker or serial killer."  He admitted, drumming his fingers on the strap of his bag.  With a bit of careful sidestepping, Elladan ducked into the aisle so he wasn't trapping the photographer on the row.

"You're welcome, I guess?  I didn't really get a good look-"  Well, shock would do that!  "- But I couldnt' see where you edited it to make it too like that."  Elladan pitched his voice quiet for that, since it was, technically speaking, against the assignment.  But it had to be edited, because he knew his face.  And Elladan knew he didn't look... well, ethereal.  Not like that.

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:07:28 PM

"I didn't edit it!" Kili chuckled with a shake of his head, carefully stepping around the man as he made space and motioned for him to leave the class together. It was endearing to see their skin turn pink so fast, and he couldn't help but playfully jab at the other a bit.

"Don't tell me you've been unaware of how attractive and almost magical you look? I'm sure the girls of our school wishes they had your looks."

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:10:53 PM

"Now you're just taking the mick!  I'm pretty sure I'm supposed to be the one giving you a hard time!"  Elladan fixed his bag on his shoulder and fell into step beside him as they headed up the stairs and out of the lecture hall.  Most of their classmates seemed to be lingering behind, and he could feel their curious, appraising gazes as they left class together.

Well, that was going to be tomorrow's gossip!

"But sorry, nope!  I think you need to see an optometrist, cause there's definitely something wrong with your prescription."  And it wasn't that people hadn't commented, but that was just the nicknamed, faceless commenters on his videos. And always in relation to his twin, which didn't count!

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:13:49 PM

"I mean... You can try to give me a hard time," he teased with a grin, pushing his hands in his pockets. It was almost weird how natural teasing this guy was, but he wholeheartedly enjoyed it. 

"My bad, you might be right though," Kili replied thoughtfully, making a show of stopping and pulling his glasses off, then cleaning them on his shirt before placing them back on his nose.

Then he gasped, placing a hand on his chest.

"My god, it's an angel!"

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:16:43 PM

"Is it too late to reconsider punching you?!"  It was the least intimidating threat, considering Elladan burst into laughter halfway through.  "I don't even know your name, and already you're creeping on me, and making fun of me after.  Great first impression!"

Flashing him a million megawatt grin, Elladan couldn't help but try and sneak a proper look at the face behind the glasses-- something he regretted as soon as his stomach did that swooping thing again.  "So, can I get your name, or should I just call you Not-A-Creep?"

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:20:09 PM

The sound of his laughter made Kili's chest tighten, and he realised with a shock he was crushing and crushing hard on someone he just met! Fucking christ, Fili could never find out.

"It's Killian, but I prefer to go by Kili," he laughed with a shrug of his shoulders. "Also if you're going to punch me, let me take my glasses off first. They were expensive."

Once again he removed the glassed and pulled out the container for them from the side pocket of his bag. "I only need them for reading anyway," he added, snapping the lid close before turning his attention back to the guy, brown eyes peering at him curiously. "What about your name?"

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:24:13 PM

Kili... Elladan was pretty sure that actually having a name for his mystery photographer was a bad thing.  It was personal.  It was the equivalent of admitting that he wanted to get to know the person behind that disarming smile.

God, he was a so screwed.

SO screwed.

"Promise, I'll give you at least a few seconds warning before I clock you."  He made a show of tracing the tip of his finger over his heart, trying to keep something like a straight face.  It wasn't working!  

"Me? Elladan.  It'd say it's nice to meet you, but... Ok, it actually is.  Weird, but good."

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:28:24 PM

"Definitely not your typical first meeting," Kili snickered. "I'm really fucking embarrassed about it though. Like when I realised you were in the same class I hoped the floor would swallow me," he admitted laughing, fingers running through his hair and catching on the small tangles.

Around them the students were filing out, some lucky ones could head out while some still had a class to take. Sometimes he regretted taking the metalwork class, but he wanted to be useful for his brother so he had to be stuck welding metal every other afternoon.

"You already free for the day?"

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:34:24 PM

"You and me both!  I was half asleep at the back of the class when suddenly- bam!  My own face ten feet tall!"  Elladan rubbed the back of his neck, unconsciously mirroring Kili's nervous gesture from earlier.

"Ah, nope, not yet.  I have a bit of time to grab lunch, then I've got Intro to Horror Theory until four."  He teasingly pulled a look of terror, one hand clasped over his mouth, wide eyes and all.  "What about you?  Are you heading off campus, or to class, or...?"

Or can I find an excuse to talk to you again?  Because right now I can't think of one, and I really want to.

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:38:28 PM

"I wish, but I have to go to the metalwork in like fourty minutes," Kili groaned dramatically, throwing his head back. "Because naturally I love to spend my afternoon sweaty and dirty from the ash and metal instead of going out or playing a game."

He chuckled and straightened up again, shifting weight from one leg to another as he avoided Elladan's gaze. "So... Do you maybe wanna grab lunch together? I was hoping to eat anyway."

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:43:19 PM

"Metalwork?  Really?"  Not that he knew anything about Kili, apart from the fact that he had an eye for photography and a smile that was really really distracting.  But he didn't seem like the metalworking kind!

At least, he didn't look like one of the muscle bound meatheads Elladan had met from the class.

"Yeah...  Yeah, I'd like that.  I mean--"  Elladan's grey eyes flicked up to the ceiling and his smile had just begun to soften, all boyish and nervous, when he heard a piercing catcall from the end of the corridor.

With a start, he looked down the small cluster of their classmates loitering around the intersection.  "Guess we know how Turner got that photo!  Got your boyfriend to pose for it, didja?"

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 4:50:25 PM

The good mood vanished like a snap of a finger, and Kili grit his teeth together as he heard the calls and laughs. Now on the outside, he knew he didn't look like much. Firm muscles without the bulk, the glasses, the nervous stutter whenever he had to present in front of the class.

But personality wise, he was a hothead who ended up in quite some troubles now and then, for his mouth worked faster than his head.

And he was already spewing out words without a second thought.

"Brent, for once in your life shut your fucking mouth. You're just jealous your butterfly picture got a F. We all saw that disaster."

eloquated4/18/2020, 4:57:58 PM

Despite what Kili had said about him (and he was pretty sure that was all in defense of his decision to use him as the subject of his photograph) Elladan didn't see much when he looked in the mirror. He was too thin, almost femme with his long hair (which he liked, so people could fuck off it they had a problem with it), and it wasn't the first time a jerk had tried to take a shot at him.

Usually Elladan was quick with a reply.  But apparently not as quick as Kili!

Elladan watched as Brent spluttered in a growing rage, his hands balling and relaxing at his sides.  "Just ignore him.  He's just jealous that you didn't use him for your subject."  He said just loudly enough to be heard over the purple-faced snorting at the end of the hall.

With a brightening half smile, he tilted his head in the other direction, "Lunch?  I'm starving."

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 5:02:40 PM

"Don't worry, I know exactly who to go to if the next topic is 'brainless'," Kili chuckled as well, and resisted the urge to take Elladan's hand in his own. Where the hell had that urge even come from? For all he knew, Elladan was straight as a razor and he was once again crushing on someone he had no chances with.

Yet he couldn't help but smile in return as he nodded and followed Elladan and left the snickering people behind them. He didn't care what others thought of him but his urge to protect others was strong.

"Man, what a bunch of dicks," he groaned once they were out of the hearing distance. "Fucking hate people like him and unfortunately, there's quite a few at our school."

eloquated4/18/2020, 5:08:38 PM

"Don't let them get to you, it's not worth it.  I can count to their combined IQ on one hand."  He could still hear the sounds of spluttering bully as they turned the corner, and Elladan wished he could ignore the bright, happy little thought that Kili had defended... Alright, himself.  

Probably just himself.  Elladan was just collateral benefit.

Crushing on straight guys was begging for trouble.  And he had enough on his plate without alienating someone who could be a friend.

"They'll give us a hard time until they find something else.  The next time someone waves something shiny at them, they'll forget.  Talk about orcs..."

Mikilieth4/18/2020, 5:11:55 PM

"You sound like my brother," Kili laughed. "He used to tell me the same thing every time I came home bruised because people like them thought they could bully people they thought were weaker."

He opened the large glass doors to the campus yard, and scouted for a place where they could eat in relative peace but would also make it to their classes once the time came.

"He used to say I had a hero complex but honestly, I'm just a hothead who doesn't like assholes like that."

eloquated4/18/2020, 5:18:20 PM

"Clearly he and I are the smart brothers, then-- because I've had to tell mine that over and over again!  I don't like bullies, either.  But I liked us coming home in shades of purple and green even less."  Because there had never been a question of where Elladan would be if Elrohir mouthed off to the idiots.  He'd be right there beside him, often down in the dirt!

Shifting his bag higher on his shoulder, Elladan pointed to the far side of the yard, where a few pretty girls, probably in the same sorority from the look of it, were just leaving, "Over there?  It's kind of busy, but I don't mind sitting on the grass if you don't."

Elladan paused a beat, his gaze just happening to avoid Kili's, "You don't make a bad hero, but I'd rather not see you purple and green, either."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 2:51:44 AM

The words brought a new layer of blush over Kili's skin, and he scratched his stubble with a sheepish smile. "I suppose I could try to avoid any unnecessary confrontation," he mumbled as he plopped himself down on the grass, opening the zipper of his bag.

He rummaged for a moment before pulling out a small box and a bottle of soda. Cracking it open, Kili tipped his head back and took couple of large swallows, releasing a breath of relief. "Didn't realise how parched I was."

eloquated4/19/2020, 8:17:09 AM

"Or at least pick your battles?  Someone like Brent isn't worth it, he's too dum to understand why you're fighting him.  In fact, I'm not sure he'd understand the word 'principle', even if you beat him with the dictionary!"  

That smile of Kili's was going to be the death of him, Brent and his other meatheaded goons weren't going to have to lift a finger.

The grass was dry and a little prickly as Elladan dropped down beside Kili, his face turned up to the bright sunlight for a long, rejuvenating moment.  Eyes closed, he exhaled long and slow, just trying to shake off the cobwebs from sitting in the lecture hall for more than an hour, watch the endless slides of half composed, dubiously executed, photos. 

"I think it's something about the photography hall,"  He agreed after a minute, fishing a water bottle from his bag, "It's always super dry in there. Maybe Professor Kerrigan is trying to turn us into one of those mummies he likes so much?"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 8:22:13 AM

"Might be," Kili said thoughtfully, starting to unwrap his meal which consisted of couple of breads and a single cookie. "He claims it's the best kind of air to keep old photographs in but I'm sure he's just trying to dry us all up."

He rested his weight against one of his hand and started to eat with the other. It was a beautiful day, and in a way he hoped they weren't at the school grounds for the sound of other students broke through the illusion that he was spending time alone with Elladan.

He really should be slowing down. He was falling too fast.

"So you have a brother too?"

eloquated4/19/2020, 8:31:20 AM

"Well, as long as we get through the unit on tintyping and developing before he mummifies us.  I don't even care how intensely geeky that sounds!  Apparently he's one of the best in the world, and I don't know anything about it, other than it looks cool."

Opening the container from his bag, Elladan gave the slightly worse the wear collection of sheet pasta and vegetables a cursory poke with the end the fork that had been tucked into the lid.  "Yeah, just the one, and a sister."  He sat up crosslegged and grinned down at Kili, blowing a few strands of back hair out of his face from where they'd escaped the plait down his back.  "He's the one that made this... moussaka thing.  We're both trying to cook more, but it's definitely not our strong suit!  Do you just have the one brother, or..?"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 8:35:23 AM

Kili couldn't stop himself from making a face at the sight of the food, instantly back pedalling with an apology. "Yeah sorry, that doesn't look very appetising," he agreed taking a bite of the bread. "But I'm sure you'll learn, especially if you keep practicing," he added quickly, waving his hand around in before settling with a smile. 

"I have an older brother yeah. Most of the time we're both too busy to properly cook, so most of the time my lunch consists of bread or something equally simple."

eloquated4/19/2020, 8:46:49 AM

"It tastes better than it looks, I promise!"  But he still pulled a teasingly mock-disgusted face as he lifted a bit of formerly roasted vegetable... eggplant?  And popped it into his mouth.  Elladan scrunched his nose, trying not to laugh with his mouth full.

"Ok, needs some work.  But it's food, so I'm not going to be too picky!  At least until the caf is up and running again."

It was the sort of beautiful spring day that made him feel more alive, like he could breathe after a winter stuck inside.  And the company?  Even better.  Much better... God, he was cute...

"That sounds like mine and me, you guys live together?  Elrohir and I got an apartment off campus this year."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 8:49:46 AM

"Same!" Kili laughed, flashing Elladan a bright smile. "Well, we did that almost two years ago since Fili is older than me and have already graduated," he continued humming, finishing the bread with a quick lick of his finger.

"It's nothing big, but it beats living in the dorms."

eloquated4/19/2020, 8:55:48 AMEdited 4/19/2020, 8:56:18 AM

"I'm pretty sure anything was better than living in the dorms!  Our first year we shared with two other guys-- which is basically like living in a petri dish!"  Elladan grinned and feigned a shudder, "We moved out halfway through our second year; it was either that, or become devotees of the God of Mold and Seriously Disgusting Socks."

They didn't have a long time, but Elladan found himself loathe to leave, mentally filing away the little bits and pieces he was learning about his new... friend?  Friend.  

"So he's not just the protective brother, but the older one as well?  'Ro likes to play big brother sometimes, but it doesn't work very well!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 8:59:33 AM

"Hah, you're the older one then?" Kili asked curiously, closing the lid of his now empty lunchbox and placing it back in his bag. Technically he should be leaving already, but if he ran to the class he could afford a couple of more minutes with Elladan.

Their next class together was in two days which sucked, but he couldn't just ask for a number right now. That would definitely give off more creepy vibes and he didn't want to scare Elladan away.

eloquated4/19/2020, 9:02:26 AM

Tucking his own lunch remains away (and making a note that that recipe could just stay far away from their usual rotation, favourite of their father or not!)  Elladan stretched out on the grass, one arm thrown across his face in lieu of sunglasses.

"No, he's older, technically.  But we're twins, so he's only older by a few minutes.  You're lucky he decided not to take Photography this year, otherwise he'd have been there today, too!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 9:06:42 AM

"You've got a twin?" Kili asked surprised, his eyes widening a bit. There were two of these gorgeous people? Oh no, no no God had to have something against him if that was the case. How could he handle /two/ of them together?

Well, now he was just getting ahead of himself. Most likely, he wouldn't even meet the other twin.

"Thank god for the small mercies then," he chuckled and swallowed, regretfully getting up from the grass. "I quite literally have to run but uh... I'll see you in class then?"

eloquated4/19/2020, 9:15:56 AM

It was nice to talk to someone who didn't immediately make the connection between he and Elrohir; as much as he and his twin were deeply attached, they certainly weren't interchangeable!  "Yeah, I'm sure you'll-- Oh shit, you're right, we do."

With a blink, Elladan glanced over at the large clock at the end of the yard, and began tossing his own things haphazardly into his bag, "In class, definitely.  I'll--"  There was no time to ask for his number, and even if there was, Elladan had no idea how to ask.  So instead, he shouldered his bag, and reluctantly rose to his feet. "See you on Friday."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 9:22:51 AM

"I'm looking forward to it," Kili grinned, giving a small wave of his hand before dashing towards the lecture building.

Naturally, he didn't get Elladan out of his head over the next day. He had hoped they'd bump in the hallways but it seemed like their other lessons always crossed the other which soured Kili's mood very quickly. His brother was quick to pick up the change in him and he teased Kili about a crush, which Kili vehemently denied even if his red cheeks gave it away.

At the night, he laid on his bed staring at the photo he had taken. How could he fall for someone so quickly? He barely knew the guy, this could only end in hurt.

eloquated4/19/2020, 9:36:33 AM

There was never a shortage of things to do.  Elladan had school work, and video editing, and the loose 'schedule' of filming he kept up with his brother. But his mind just wasn't in it!  On campus he found himself looking around, watching the crowds a bit too closely for a mop of dark curls.

By Thursday night, Elladan was starting to suspect that Kili had been some figment of his imagination!  A wonderful, but imaginary encounter.  Because how else could someone drop into his life, shake it up so thoroughly, and then vanish back into the ether?!

Unaware that Kili was also getting the teasing of a lifetime from his brother, Elladan wondered how he was doing. He turned their brief meeting over and over in his head, until it started to feel more than a little ridiculous!  Crushes at first sight didn't exist... right?

Friday morning came with a thundering deluge and an 8am class.  Not to mention one broken umbrella, turned inside out by the wind, and the damp seeping through his jacket.  Elladan shrugged it off as he arrived in the lecture hall, and set his coffee (extra large, it was already aiming to be a day) on the edge of his desk.

Anatomy, Portraits, and Human Composition said the board in their professor's bold, block hand.

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 9:41:00 AM

The morning had not started how he had imagined. First he had woken up late, then burnt his breakfast and to top it all off it started pouring rain while he was riding the bicycle to school which ended up in him being completely drenched.

He ended up stumbling into the class half a hour late, his curls wilder than before and drops of water sticking on his skin and glasses. He briefly apologised before shrugging off the wet hoodie with a shudder, thanking God that at least his shirt underneath had remained relatively dry.

His jeans felt extremely uncomfortable though, the fabric sticking to his skin as he flopped on his desk and immediately tipped his head back so he could flash Elladan a tired grin.

eloquated4/19/2020, 9:44:37 AM

The class had already started when Kili had washed in, looking about as happy as the situation as Elladan felt!  Most of the class seemed to be in variations of the same mood, damp and tired, and thoroughly unimpressed by being out of bed at that hour, and in that weather.

Elladan was sitting in his usual spot, about three quarters of the way back and on the left side-- and today there were no available spots near him.  More frustrating!  So he flashed Kili a mirrored grin, and a shared look of long suffering.  And just when he'd been thinking that it wasn't worth it to get out of bed... That smile changed his mind.

So he did exist, after all!

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 9:47:24 AM

Their professor didn't seem to care that the entire class was suffering as he explained the assignment with a drony voice that almost made Kili drift right back to sleep. He only became alert when they were told to pair up and practice portraits and whatnot, and his stomach swooped as he glanced back at Elladan and lifted an eyebrow in question.

eloquated4/19/2020, 9:51:44 AM

"Alright, class, split into pairs... For Monday, I want six photos from each of you, demonstrating use of people in your composition.  You can utilize the whole person, a focus on particular parts-"  He waited impassively for the tired wash of giggles to fade before adding, "Or any combination of the two."

Elladan leaned back in his seat, instinctively seeking out Kili in the hall (and he shouldn't.  He really shouldn't.  Crushing on straight boys was a bad bad idea, and he should really nip this before it became a problem!).  

He still nodded quickly at the silent question, unable to stop the nervous-happy-oh-my-god butterflies, or his own smile.  Wordlessly he flashed Kili a thumb's up, and motioned towards the door.  Talk after class?

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 9:57:25 AM

Kili flashed him a smile and a nod in return and after that, the class could not end soon enough. He didn't want to risk getting caught throwing notes do he restrained himself from doing so and instead completely blocked out the professor's voice as his mind was already thinking of what kind of pictures he could take of Elladan.

The other was gorgeous, it would be an easy job as long as he could keep his head straight.

Hah.

He was one of the first ones out of class as soon as the bell rung and he waited outside the hall, leaning against the wall as he watched people pour out. Someone asked if he was waiting for his boyfriend and he merely flipped them off.

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:05:08 AM

Five minutes before the end of class, Elladan was more than ready to go.  Unfortunately, the person blocking him into the row had other ideas.  Impatiently he drummed his fingers on the strap of his bag as Felicity and Amber giggled and chatted, obliviously unaware that they were holding up everyone else.

When he was finally free (free!) he jogged up the stairs, his bag tucked behind him, and escaped into the corridor.  "Hey!"  He beamed, forgetting to check his enthusiasm, "I was starting to think you weren't coming in today."  His words were interrupted by a peal of deafening thunder, "... Or that you couldn't find a place on the ark."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:11:46 AM

Kili instantly brightened at the sight of Elladan, and it was the excited tone on the other's voice that made his stomach do that stupid flip again. It wasn't like Elladan had spent the last two days thinking of him like some lovesick teenager, right?

"I must admit that the urge to remain in bed today was strong," Kili groaned motioning to his still wet clothes. "But I didn't want to miss-" he cut himself off just in time and cleared his throat, avoiding Elladan's eyes as he felt his skin heat up despite the cold. 

"... The class. Didn't want to miss the class. ¥

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:13:04 AMEdited 4/19/2020, 10:15:05 AM

"Me either.."  Well, he hadn't wanted to miss the chance to see Kili again.  Elladan knew he should be more worried about his academics, but really?  The other man just made his mind blank.  "You're still soaked though."  

In commiseration, Elladan held up his damp hoodie and pulled a face, feeling the wet weight of it.  "But..."

Bad idea.  BAD IDEA.  

"I don't live far from here?  I mean, unless you have class later, right?  I thought we could work on this project--"  Well, it was as convenient an excuse as anything!  And he definitely wasn't blushing.. nope...  "-- And dry off?  I don't know about you, but I don't want to spend the rest of the day in wet jeans.  Gross."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:19:53 AM

He definitely had a class later, but surely he could live with missing one class of math? He could always catch up later when he was back at home because right now he felt like there was no force enough to stop him from joining Elladan.

"I mean if it's alright?" He asked just to make sure, fidgeting on his feet. "Any longer and I'm afraid people are gonna see whether I've lied about the inches or not," he joked making a vague gesture towards his crotch before snickering. "Sorry, that was inappropriate."

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:23:13 AM

It was definitely not what Elladan had expected him to say, and the laugh felt surprised right out of him!  "Yeah, it's alright.  Lets go... before you give the student body anything else to gossip about!"

It had taken all of fifteen minutes for people to start speculating about them after the very public photo incident, after all!  "I guess us working on this project isn't actually going to help the stories, though.  I've heard some pretty creative ones already!  I'm pretty sure some of our classmates should be writing for Playboy, they've got the imagination for it."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:25:17 AM

"Oh I've heard some too!" Kili laughed relieved that his joke hadn't upset Elladan. Seriously, sometimes his quick mouth got him into so much trouble.

"How about we share our favourite while we go?"

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:28:07 AM

"Why not?  Come on, it's just this way."  It was going to be a wet walk, but they were already damp, and at least they could get dry on the other end!  Zipping his sweater up under his chin, Elladan tucked his long braid down the back, and tugged up his hood, just trying to keep the worst of the rain off.

"Obviously, of course, we've been seeing each other in secret."  He teased, ticking off the first rumour on his slender fingers, "I heard one that it's been going on since middle school-- I'm not sure how they got that, since Ro and I didn't even move here until we started university!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:33:39 AM

"Oh yeah, I would definitely remember you if we were in the same middle school," Kili countered with a chuckle, only to realise what his words might mean and he skipped over a puddle so he didn't have to meet Elladan's eyes.

"I think one of my favourites is that I was tutoring you and you fell madly in love with me," he said dramatically, placing a hand on his heart.

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:37:10 AM

Truth be told, Elladan didn't mind the rumours.  Oh, they made him a little fluttery sometimes, and there was an increasingly loud voice that wished they were true-- but they weren't upsetting at all. Just.. wishful.

"I hadn't heard that one!"  He exclaimed, innocently missing the comment about their younger years.  He held open the door as they stepped outside, and the rain immediately flooded over them, cold and soaking in seconds.  "Fuck!  I think we need a rowboat!"

"So you won me over with your scintillating intellect, huh?  And how long did it take you to realize I was totally hot for teacher?"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:44:12 AM

"wait, what?" Kili burst out laughing, a shiver running down his spine as soon as the cold water washed over him. Well, at least he was stuck in the rain with Elladan.

It took him a moment to realise Elladan wasn't speaking of an actual teacher, but the him in the fantasy.

"Oh apparently it took me a long while because I was very dense," he snickered.

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:49:17 AM

Kili's laugh was the most infectious thing, and Elladan couldn't remember the last time he'd laughed so easily, or so much.  The adrenaline was bright in his veins, making his heart beat quicker, and chasing off a little of the windy, wet cold.

"Maybe I was just very good at hiding it!  Did you hear the one about us sneaking off to do unspeakable things in the dark room?"  He teased back, "Neither of us is very big, but that still seems ambitious!  There's no room in there, and I can think of half a dozen developing chemicals I wouldn't want anywhere near that part of my body."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:51:22 AM

"Oh god, the smells alone would be enough to make us either faint or fail to get it up, very romantic," he laughed stepping straight into a puddle, which made him jump ahead with one leg as he cursed loudly over his completely soaked sneaker and socks.

"Fucking hell! Is this the God's wrath on us poor gay people?!"

eloquated4/19/2020, 10:56:07 AM

"Screwing in a fog of acetic acid and amidol, very sexy!"  

Elladan jumped back to avoid the worst of the splash as Kili misjudged one of the deep potholes that pitted the parking lot, the sluice of muddy grey water soaking through his already wet shoes and up his pant leg.  For half a second he just laughed, long suffering and, "Gross, now we definitely need to get back to my place!"

Wait.  Gay?  Elladan ran the blurted comment back through his mind, heart skittering over because oh.  OH.  Not straight.  That... That changed things.

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 10:58:38 AM

"Oh that's disgusting, I really liked these jeans," Kili mourned as he shook his leg in a futile effort of shaking the water and mud off. Naturally, it did not work. Unaware of his accidental confession and the thoughts running through Elladan's head, he let out a long suffering sigh.

"you're quite literally the Knight in shining armor right now. Otherwise I might just end up sitting on the puddle crying."

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:01:22 AM

"It's alright, we'll throw them into the wash when we get to my place, you can borrow something until then.  I'm not going to make you sit around in whatever was in that puddle!"  Elladan's cheeky grin softened a little, and he bumped Kili's shoulder with his own, closing the space between them for the first time.

It was such a small thing.  Silly, really.  But it sent a quick, warm jolt right up his arm.  

"You just have to put up with it until we get there.  And hey, it's not like we can get any wetter!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:04:36 AM

"No no no haven't you seen the movies! Never, ever say that cursed sentence," Kili protested laughing,and for a brief moment he hoped he could have felt Elladan's skin against his own instead of the fabric which alright, a thought he had to diminish quick before he ended up in a very embarrassing situation.

"How can I ever repay you? You're too kind to me."

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:07:48 AM

"You're the self proclaimed hero here, not me!  I'm just trying to keep a friend from drowning."  Elladan ducked his head and tugged the hood of his sweater a little more securely over his head, trying to hide a flush that he hoped would be blamed on the wind.

Gay.  But that didn't mean he liked him.  Or that he was even out.  Which ultimately gave Elladan just enough hopeful rope to potentially hang himself!

"And of course I've heard that curse sentence!  I'm studying film making, my knowledge of bad tropes of unparalleled.  But I laugh in the face of doom, ha-ha-ha!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:10:16 AM

"Don't you go quoting Lion King to me," Kili shot back immediately, feeling the butterflies flutter in his stomach once again. Could Elladan get any more attractive? It just wasn't fair, how were the mere mortals supposed to compare to him?

"Film making huh, how'd you end up there?"

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:20:21 AM

Like most geek artistic types, Elladan perked up enthusiastically at the mention of his major.  "I started as an English major, actually!  I want to write, and I want to tell stories.  But in my first year I ended up taking some media studies classes, and I realized that I want to direct my own stories, not just wait for someone else to."

And it helped with his channel, but Elladan wasn't about to offer that up!  Not when he was enjoying keeping it separate.  Something private, untouched by the algorithm!

"What about you?  I know you take photography and shop, but what're you going to do with it?"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:23:23 AM

"I take shop to help my brother," Kili smiled, wiping the water from his face. "He fixes motorbikes on his free time, so I thought I'd figure out a way to help him since he lets me live with him," he explained, removing his glasses with a small sigh.

No use to wear them since he couldn't see anyway.

"As for photography, I'm just a huge geek of everything related to games and movies, and I'm hoping to maybe develop my own website one day. “

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:29:06 AM

"I think that means you win the Good Brother olympics."  He pointed out, leading the way across the busy intersection when the light changed.  "I don't think you'd ever catch me or Ro in a mechanics workshop, we'd be totally lost!"

But it said a lot about Kili.  And all of it good.

"That's really cool.  I know everyone is always saying we should have this big, mapped out plan, but I'm not sure what I want to do yet.  So right now we're just sharing a place, and studying stuff we like, and hoping we can find some use for it when we're done!"  He summarized his life with a boyish grin, and fished the keys from his pocket when they approached a decently well-off apartment building.

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:37:58 AM

"Yeah I know what you mean," Kili replied, trying to squeeze most of the water out of his clothes so he wouldn't soak the entire house. "I don't know if I want to do websites my entire life, I mean it'd be really cool to develop own games too," he continued. "I have a very active imagination, or so I've been told."

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:42:46 AM

"We should probably put our active imaginations to work on this anatomy photography project!"  The inside of the building was dry and clean; not fancy, but scrubbed and in good repair.  "We're just up on the eight floor." He added, already shrugging off his drenched sweater as they ducked into the elevator.

"Ugh, everything is sticking.  Gross."  He added, plucking at his jeans, and the tshirt he'd had underneath, already plastered wetly to his body.  Under the thick hoodie he was very thin, jeans hitched on sharp hip bones and a flash of pale stomach visible when he tried to pull his shirt off his skin.  

"I've got to figure out six compositions to really do justice to you."

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:46:06 AM

The words he wanted to say got stuck in his throat as soon as he saw just how slim and beautiful Elladan's body looked like, as the shirt showed absolutely /everything/. His gaze trailed the path of a stray drop of water and he was forced to tear his gaze away, his next words stuttering a bit.

"Ah I'm sure you can just throw me on a chair and take six photos there, I'm not very photogenic," he laughed ashamed. "I'm more comfortable behind the camera."

eloquated4/19/2020, 11:49:41 AM

Out of respect for the other people in the building, Elladan stayed mostly to the centre of the elevator as it rose upwards, the floor humming faintly through the puddles they left underfoot.  

"Ha!"  He snorted a laugh and rolled his eyes.  If you saw yourself the way I do, you wouldn't be saying that.  You'd be awkwardly trying to find a way to complete this project without -- ahem-- God, I'm fucked.  

"I like the way you look... You've just set the bar really high, and I can't let you walk away with-"  Me?  "Ah, the better grade!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 11:53:01 AM

"Oh so it's a competition then?" Kili asked playfully, ruffling the water from his hair. At least they weren't in the rain anymore but now he was painfully aware of his cold he felt, and how his body was beginning to shiver as it tried to create the necessary warmth.

"Is it alright for your brother that I just appear?

eloquated4/19/2020, 12:00:37 PM

"Why not?  The professor grades on a curve anyway!  And it's not like we're going to get much challenge from most of the rest of the class."  Since the grand majority of them were there thinking it was an easy grade.

Both of them were chilled through as the elevator finally reached their floor, and Elladan hitched his bag higher on his shoulder, scurrying out.  Every inch of bare arm was covered in goosebumps, and he walked a bit faster as he lead the way to the right unit.  

"Ro isn't going to care.  He's in class, and this place has separate rooms, unlike the last one.  He can just close his door and ignore us."  

The inside of the apartment was a sort of productive chaos.  Two easels with half finished projects stood by a massive window that dominated the front of the apartment, and looked down over the green space next door. It was all one room, with the tiny kitchen and living room smushed in together, and a small table that had clearly been repurposed as both storage and study.  A comfortable couch was across from the tv, and the far corner was set up as filming space, the wall decorated to give the impression of a set. A narrow staircase lead up to a loft, overlooking the living room through a sliding latticed door.  It wasn't messy, exactly; but it was clear that the people who lived here were busy.

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 12:04:17 PM

Kili looked around curiously, his lip curling up as he took in the surprisingly controlled mess. It was clear Elladan and his brother were very similar, and he wondered just what they were doing with this many equipment. Some of them seemed very expensive too!

"I like it," he chuckled as he forecully pulled his shoes off and made a face at the wet fabric. "It feels very lived in and homely."

eloquated4/19/2020, 12:09:22 PM

"Thanks!  It's a bit of a thing at the moment, but Ro's an art major, for now-"  Elladan grinned cheekily as he knelt down to do battle with his swollen, wet laces, "And he has a ton of things that had invaded the living room.  The bedrooms aren't exactly-- jesus, what did they make these laces out of?  Sponge?  Anyway, the bedrooms are pretty tiny, so he moved them out here."

With a triumphant laugh, he managed to untie his shoes and kick them off, wiggling his toes in wet socks before stripping those off, too, "I don't know about you, but I feel gross.  You can come up to my room, or I'll just toss you down something, and we can get changed before we start on the project?"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 12:12:13 PM

"I'm not shy about changing with others, but if you're more comfortable in changing alone I completely understand," Kili said smiling, wrapping his arms around himself as another shiver ran through his body.

"I don't care if I have to change in the elevator as long as I just get to change. I'm prone to get sick easily so I'm preparing for the worst."

eloquated4/19/2020, 12:16:57 PM

Elladan's eyes widened a little at the admission and he nodded hastily, "Right, I'll hurry my ass up, then.  You can come up if you want, I'll hide the bodies!" 

Barefoot and dripping, Elladan jogged up the stairs towards his room.  'Room' was a bit of an exaggeration, though.  The loft was large, and the two spaces were divided with a wall down the middle, but not at the front, leaving them half open.  Elrohir's was dominated by canvasses, some of them leaning against the bed, and Elladan's was at the end-- a little tidier, though the bed was unmade, and there were clothes strewn over it, and the far corner was filled with books.

"Thankfully you're not a huge guy!"  He said over his shoulder, rummaging through his dresser, "Otherwise this might be harder!"

Mikilieth4/19/2020, 12:31:26 PM

"Nah, the only problem I think will be the height difference," Kili laughed as he followed Elladan, still wrapped tightly with his arms. His gaze flit around the room and he silently appraised it, trying to learn every detail from the other as he could.

"I mean you're taller, so I'll be swimming in your clothes. I think only your shirt is almost enough to be a small dress for me."

eloquated4/19/2020, 12:34:41 PM

"Gimme a break, you're not that short!  And I'm definitely not that tall!"  He laughed, shaking his head and rummaging through his things.  He was thinner, but Kili was shorter, which wasn't ideal-- but sweat pants were warm, and he knew he had a couple in the back of the drawer.  "But if you want a small dress, I'm sure I have one around here somewhere..."

With a teasing eyebrow wiggle, Elladan tossed him a sweater, a tshirt, and a pair of sweat pants.  Nothing fancy, but they were soft, and warm, and smelled of his soap.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 8:11:25 AM

"Now the real question is, why would you have a dress in your drawer in the first place?" Kili shot back with a grin, catching the tossed clothes with ease. He didn't waste any time and moved a bit further away before peeling the wet shirt from his skin.

The silver piercing glinted on his chest for a brief moment as he changed the shirt, and he huffed out an amused chuckle as he realised the shirt almost covered his midnight. 

At least it covered most of his boxers once he changed the pants.

eloquated4/20/2020, 8:28:28 AM

"Or maybe the real question is why wouldn't I?"  Elladan returned without missing a beat, his cheeky smile half hidden in profile, "Anyway, lots of reasons!  But mostly?  Because if Ro or I need models, we usually use each other.  It's easier cause we're already both here!"

It was so tempting.. so very, very tempting... To try and catch a look at Kili while he was getting changed.  The sort of tempting that made his stomach tense, and the back of his neck feel warm.. And which would probably be really pervy, even though Kili had said he didn't care.

But it was dark enough outside, the rain lashing against the window, that he could see their blurred reflections.  And that wasn't the same as deliberately watching like a creeper!  Right?  Elladan he swallowed hard, suddenly dry mouthed, at the shadowy broad shoulders, and the toned, hard muscles that were definitely more defined than they looked through his clothes.

You are fucked.  Truly.  Properly.  Fucked.

"Just... ah.. give me a second to get changed too, and we'll toss the wet stuff in the laundry."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 8:38:49 AM

"Sounds good," Kili hummed as he struggled out of his jeans, colorful curses flying past his lips. God he hated when the fabric clung to his legs like that, and on top of the icky feeling it also scratched his skin which sucked. He was quick as he changed into the sweatpants, and to his own amusement he had to roll the legs up once so they wouldn't cover his toes.

Warm and dry and comfortable, Kili let out a satisfied sigh and inhaled deeply, the scent of Elladan's soap making him feel all fuzzy inside.

eloquated4/20/2020, 8:48:01 AM

Elladan snickered at the sound of Kili doing battle with layers of wet cotton and denim, "I'm not sure I've ever heard that word used in that context before!"  He teased back over his shoulder.

The upside to being cold, wet and uncomfortable was that it was almost enough to distract him from the deeply and inconveniently attractive man in his bedroom.

Fishing out some of his own clothes-- and lingering a moment over fresh jeans, before deciding that he didn't want to fight them over wet skin-- Elladan grabbed a pair of black lounging around pants and a tshirt with the word "Paste!" blocked across the front.  His wet things stuck as he stripped out of them, his back to Kili with a measure of self consciousness as he changed.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 8:51:19 AM

As much as he wanted to sneak a peek at Elladan as he heard the other change, he didn't want to risk their friendship over being a pervert. If he got caught well... Things could turn awkward very fast.

"Do you have a preference whether you want to model or photograph first?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 9:07:20 AM

"Not really, no.  You can go first if you have some kind of idea. I'm sort of--"  Elladan rolled his shoulders in a noncommittal shrug, "Toying with the idea of something still life?  Like I've caught you in the middle of doing something."

Elladan tugged his shirt over his head, the material catching an embarrassed laugh, "Like writing, I mean!  Or watching tv.  Fuck, that sounded suspicious when I said it!"

Impatiently, Elladan twisted his long,long braid up against the nape of his neck, stabbing a pencil through the knot to keep it in place.  "Ugh, I don't mind wet hair, but I don't want it dripping all down the back of my dry shirt."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 9:10:00 AMEdited 4/20/2020, 9:12:16 AM

He had never in his life seen anyone use a pen to keep their hair up, so he was both caught off guard and amused. But he was quick to focus on the embarrassed laugh and the words Elladan had spoken and come on, how could he really resist teasing the other a bit?

"Well... The professor did say we could focus on a certain part of the body if we wished," he drawled out with a wiggle of his eyebrows.

eloquated4/20/2020, 9:24:06 AM

"I'm not sure I have the skills to make that look good!"  He grinned, catching Kili's eye in the reflection in the dark window.  "But don't let me stop you from living your best centrefold life!"

Cinching the pants around his waist, Elladan gathered up his discarded clothes and made sure to clean out his pockets, before nodding towards the door, "Laundry. Coffee.  Then you can figure out what parts of you you want 10 feet tall in front of the class."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 9:34:19 AM

Kili gasped in mock shock, placing a hand above his heart. "Are you saying it's ugly? That's rude, you haven't even seen it!"

He gathered his wet clothes and mirrored Elladan's actions of checking the pockets before telling the other to lead the way to the laundry room. "What about you? Do you have a preference you wish to see of yourself?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 9:37:37 AM

Elladan made a show of rolling his grey eyes, smirking as he blew a few loose strands of wet black hair from his eyes, "I'm not exactly the cock connoisseur, I'll take your word for it!"

Though not for a lack of interest!  (Not that he was thinking about that, because sweat pants hid no manner of sins.)

"I don't know.  I'm happy letting you choose- you've got more experience photographing me!"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 9:41:54 AM

"That was one time," Kili muttered embarrassed, resisting the urge to hide his face against the wet clothes as he followed Elladan across the apartment. Of course he had several ideas how he could photograph the other, but he had wanted to check first if Elladan had had any preferences.

"You do know that this project will just boost the rumors further, right?" He asked concerned. "Are you sure you're alright with that? I mean.... People thinking you're gay and all?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 9:47:40 AM

"I was thinking about that, yeah. I was going to ask you the same."  Elladan mused as he lead the way back down to the main living area.  They didn't have a surplus of space, but there was a small storage area off the kitchen that they'd (very narrowly!) managed to wriggle an upright washer and dryer into.  

Anything was better than trekking up and down nine flights of stairs to the basement!

"But personally?  I don't care.  They're not the first people to assume I'm gay, and I doubt they'll be the last.  And I'm not going to throw an assignment just because some neanderthal assholes think being gay is a problem."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 9:52:14 AM

Relief washed over Kili at the words, and he nodded in agreement. At least it was a relief to know that Elladan wasn't against gay people, so even if the other found out he hopefully would not be completely disgusted.

"I agree. If some people's largest problem in life is that someone else is gay, they really need to set their priorities right," Kili said as he pushed his clothes in the dryer and wiped his hands absently on the sweatpants to get rid of the excess moisture.

"they're just jealous I got the best model in the class for myself."

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:04:28 AM

Elladan caught the look of relief on Kili's face-- did he not realize he'd outed himself earlier?  The thought made him smile, lopsided and boyish, and he shook his head, "If I had a problem with gay people, I wouldn't still be hanging around you, right?  And I definitely wouldn't be giving you carte blanche to photograph me!"

He tossed the clothes into the wash and added a couple of rubbery packets of detergent with a dramatic little flourish, before starting the machine.  "I'm pretty sure nobody in the class would agree with that statement, me included!  But... er... Well, when the professor told us about the assignment, I was hoping you wouldn't mind working with me."

Elladan shrugged sheepishly and scuttled around Kili to start a cup of coffee, mostly for something to occupy his hands (and to stave off a bit more of the lingering cold!)  "Want something?  All the pod..things.. are up in that cupboard."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:08:56 AM

Confusion was written all over Kili's face for a moment at Elladan's words, as the other made it sound like he knew that-

A sudden flicker of a memory surfaced, of him jumping into the puddle and cursing the god for punishing him for being gay and all color escaped Kili's face. Had he really said that? Had he really just blurted it out and not even fucking realise it?

Oh God was really, really against him today.

"You don't happen to have just straight up poison, do you?" He wailed covering his face with his hands. He wasn't ashamed of who he was, but he hadn't counted on his brains being so fucking stupid he just outed himself like that. 

"I can't believe I just- oh my fucking god..."

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:10:57 AM

Maybe it wasn't polite, but Elladan burst out laughing at the look on Kili's face, tears springing to the corners of his eyes.  "You did, yeah!  I figured you were just really comfortably out!"  He gasped between giggles, leaning back against the counter with the head rush of amusement.

"And definitely no poison, no!  It's fine, really it is.  At least now you don't have to worry about tell me, right?  It's just out there!"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:14:21 AM

"Oh my god," Kili whined quietly, his face positively burning as he finally looked up at Elladan. Well, at least his new friend was completely alright with it and seemed amused by the entire situation.

At least one of them was having fun.

"Glad you're enjoying my embarrassment so much you dick," he groaned closing his eyes and resting his weight against the same counter Elladan rested on. "Any chance you'll just forget it ever happened?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:18:15 AM

Even flustered, embarrassed and red as a beet, Kili was unfairly gorgeous.  Elladan's stomach swooped when he slumped against the counter beside him, and fuck that just kept happening around him!  It was like being in middle school all over again, hopelessly crushing on the cute person across the class.  Same butterflies.  

"You'd laugh if I was the one carrying on!"  Staving off another attack of the giggles, he elbowed Kili's arm playfully, "Between this, and the photo in class, I don't think I'm ever going to forget you.  So nope, no chance.  You're just going to have to accept that this is the way things are!"

"It's really not that bad, though."  He added, dabbing his eyes with the end of his sleeve, "I guess you're not officially out?"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:20:30 AM

Kili's whine was high-pitched and pitiful, but a smile was already curling back on his lips as he glanced at Elladan. The wide smile looked really good on him and to be honest, he didn't mind making an idiot out of himself if it meant it would make Elladan laugh that way.

"Not officially, no. My brother knows but that's it," he admitted. "And the only reason he knows is because he caught me staring at other men more than females."

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:25:15 AM

"I'm not going to tell anyone."  He promised, voice still light and breathy with laughter.  "Really, I won't.  But I'm pretty sure people are going to figure it out, unless you make me look really bad for this assignment."

Which was an option, if Kili was actually worried about people suspecting there was more than just a brief rumour between them.

"And Ro isn't going to care, either!  He spends most of his free time making googly eyes that this guy in one of his classes, Haldir."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:26:46 AM

Kili's eyes widened at the words, and he straightened up surprised. "Is your brother alright with you just outing him like that?" he asked worriedly, drawing his lower lip between his teeth.

He knew that if Fili was telling his secret like that to someone he didn't know, he'd be more than pissed.

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:31:34 AM

Elladan grinned, a little part of him (small, tiny really!  Minuscule!) melting at Kili trying to defend his own twin from him.  "He won't care, no.  We were at this event thing last year, and someone with a camera-" 

Well, it had been an industry event, cameras had been everywhere.

"Caught him and some guy flirting.  It was pretty obvious.  But they posted the video online, hoping they could use it to get attention."  Elladan shrugged faintly, papering over just how stressful that had been at the time.  "He decided after that to just own it, rather than deny it."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:33:52 AM

"Oh that sucks," Kili winced at the thought. "Like someone choosing to out you for you is not cool, especially not like that. I'm glad he turned it into something positive though," he continued as he reached on top of the cupboard and pulled out a random capsule.

The taste didn't matter to be honest, as long as the drink was warm.

"I suppose it also explains how you're so chill with this entire thing, so in a way I lucked out," Kili chuckled.

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:39:18 AM

"Yeah, he was pissed at the time, but it all worked out for the best."  Taking the pod, Elladan shuffled around the kitchen to make stuff for them both, since his fingers and toes were still cold, and the crawling goosebumps chill hadn't left.  

Outside, the rain seemed to be attempting to wash the whole city off the map, and Elladan shivered at the next peal of thunder.  "I'm so glad you agreed to come back here to work, it'd suck to be out there right now." His hand hovered over the coffee machine for a moment, slender fingers poised over the buttons before selecting the one he wanted with a tap.

"It just doesn't feel like something to get upset over!  It's not like your dating effects me."  You only wish it did.  "How'd your brother take it?"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 10:42:08 AM

"He was super chill about it," Kili smiled at the memory, crossing his arms across his chest. "I was at the worst teenage phase by then, so of course I thought that him finding out was the worst thing in the world. I feared he'd be disgusted, or hate me. Damn near had a panic attack."

He chuckled with a shake of his head, damp hair falling in front of his eyes."He reassured me that it was alright, and that he had had his own suspicions for a while now and that no matter what, I'd still be his little brother."

A soft laugh escaped his lips.

"Of course the teasing began after I had calmed down."

eloquated4/20/2020, 10:52:30 AM

"Teasing your brother is a time honored tradition!  You'd probably be more weirded out if he hadn't."  Elladan pointed out over his shoulder, "But you know I'm trying to picture you as a teenager now, right?"

With a hiss and a trickle of steam, the machine punched out a piping hot drink, and he slid it over to Kili, "Milk and whatever is in the fridge, if you want." 

They did need to start on their project, but Elladan was enjoying himself too much to worry about it.  At first sight Kili had been disarmingly handsome, but the more he got to know him, the more he wanted to know.  What he was like, and what made him tick, and why his laughter was such a contagious thing!

"Your brother sounds pretty awesome."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 11:00:58 AM

"He is," Kili smiled accepting the warm cup and just held it between his cold fingers, enjoying the warmth with a soft sigh and a content smile. "He took me in after our parents passed away. Without him, I would have ended up in childcare or something equally horrifying so I basically owe him my life," he said fondly.

eloquated4/20/2020, 11:05:28 AM

Elladan couldn't imagine a world without his father in it.  He was too much a fixture, this unmoving rock at the centre of their family.  "I'm sorry."  He said after a pause, flashing Kili a half smile, "But yeah, definitely awesome, then.  Did you tell him about the whole thing with the photo in class?"  

Yes, it was a change of subject.  And not even a particularly subtle one!  But it was already dark, wet and gross outside... Better not to focus on the dark things they could drum up inside as well.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 11:07:04 AM

"Hell no!" Kili exclaimed immediately with a bright laugh, taking a careful sip of the hot coffee. The taste was definitely richer than any other coffee he had drank and he hummed contently.

"You're already keeping that over my head, if he knew, he'd never let me live it down either!"

eloquated4/20/2020, 11:11:11 AM

"I claim the right to hold it over your head, since it was me in the picture! And my head blown up in front of the class!"  Padding over to the L shaped sofa, Elladan hopped over the edge and draped himself into the corner, sinking into the familiar spot.

"Ro found out before I got to tell him.  One of our neanderthal classmates decided to hassle him about it.  So I got the whole brotherly lecture about posing for risque photos for strange men!"  He grinned against the edge of his cup, "So I had to set him straight."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 12:41:00 PM

"Well I suppose your brother already has a creepy impression of me," Kili laughed as he joined Elladan on the couch, sinking into the soft cushions. It felt like sitting on a cloud after the cold and rain and he couldn't help the satisfied sound that slipped from his lips.

"I know we're supposed to be working but we have all weekend, right? We could do all the thinking today and leave rest to tomorrow. I'm too comfortable to move anytime soon."

eloquated4/20/2020, 12:48:42 PM

"Don't worry about, we both have to tell our brothers "yeah, we met through a lens".  No way that's not going to seem weird."  Elladan countered, his eyes dropping closed for a lazily contented moment.

Yeah, this was much better than class.  He'd been working his ass off for ages, he deserved a mental health day.

Setting his coffee on the table to cool a little, Elladan tugged the pencil out of his hair and started unwinding the long braid that flopped into his lap.  "You could say we are working!  We're in the same space, with each other.  Looking for inspiration.  I mean, we are supposed to be photographing each other."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 12:53:17 PM

"I mean you're right in a way," Kili chuckled, relaxing further on the couch now that he knew Elladan was agreeing with him about taking it easy. He eyed Elladan's hair curiously, resting his elbow against his knee.

"How can you stand such long hair? Doesn't it drive you insane? I'd imagine it gets tangled everywhere."

eloquated4/20/2020, 12:57:26 PM

Elladan looked up, his smile sliding into something almost bashful, "I guess it's just what I'm used to? My brother's is the same."  He admitted, combing his fingers through the strands.  It was ink black, and waved faintly from being wet and braided for the last several hours.  

"And it does get in the way sometimes!  It's why I don't wear it down much-- you ever tried sitting on your own hair?  Not fun!" He laughed, the sound catching under his breath as he accidentally snagged a knot, "My mother liked it this way, so we never really cut it as kids.  My sister chopped all hers' off a few years ago into this super cute pixie thing, and my grandmother just about had a heart attack."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:03:44 PM

Kili watched him for a moment mesmerised, the glide of the hair between Elladan's fingers almost hypnotising. He couldn't imagine a life with that kind of hair, when he was already losing his mind with his curls.

"Here, you missed a spot," Kili pointed out and reached out without thinking, his fingers taking care of the knot on the back of Elladan's hair. The texture of the hair was soft and he blinked surprised, slowly threading them between his fingers. "I don't think I've ever felt soft hair like this before."

eloquated4/20/2020, 1:07:47 PM

It wasn't that people didn't touch his hair-- Elrohir did, and occasionally they ran across people in the street that seemed to think it was alright to just come up and pull his braid to see if it was real.

But those people weren't Kili.  Someone he was already distractedly attracted to, and intensely aware of, like he could feel every inch of the space between them on the couch.

Elladan was already on edge when Kili unexpectedly combed his fingers through his hair, and the resulting gasp was humiliatingly loud in the quiet living room.  His eyes dropped half closed for a moment as bright, tingling sensation zipped across his scalp and down the back of his neck, catching him entirely off guard.

"Oh?"  He gulped the word, and gave himself a stern shake back to reality, cheeks blazing.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:14:35 PM

"Yeah, it's like silk," Kili smiled, combing through Elladan's hair slowly, catching the tiny knots that hit his fingers. "It must be hard to take care of it daily. I mean, I thought my curls were tough but christ," he continued, and it was if his brains suddenly caught up with what he was doing and he froze in place.

His eyes were wide and he gaped at Elladan, the blush slowly rising up his cheeks. He didn't dare to move his hand away, didn't dare to move an inch. Even if Elladan had said that he was alright with him being who he was, this had to cross some borders.

"I'm.. I'm sorry, I wasn't thinking."

eloquated4/20/2020, 1:19:49 PM

"Mmhmm..."  Elladan's voice drifted as he unconsciously leaned into the slow path of Kili's fingers.  There was no part of him that wanted to pull away, not when he was close, and every combing pass made Elladan's skin feel alive.  

Half lidded grey eyes slowly began to close, and Elladan was fairly sure one of them needed to pull away-- but it wasn't going to be him and--

Both of them were blushing hotly when reality snapped back into place, and even the peal of thunder outside made the apartment vibrate-- like the world had returned with a bump.

"No- no- it's--"  He started to protest, one corner of his mouth jumping self consciously, "Don't apologize."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:25:12 PM

"I just..." he trailed off into silence, his fingers twitching slightly in Elladan's hair before he carefully began to comb through them again.

"I suppose I could repay your kindness by helping you care for your hair?" he offered, and even in his own mind the excuse sounded clumsy as fuck.

eloquated4/20/2020, 1:29:06 PM

It was the most transparent of excuses, and he was sure they both knew it.  But he wanted this closeness, and it was all the excuse he needed to keep it.  Elladan felt like his heart was going to burst with nerves when he shifted a little, half turning his back to Kili.

"Yeah..." He breathed, grateful their new position hid the worst of his burning cheeks, "Sounds like a fair trade.. And you're supposed to be figuring out what to photograph anyway.. It's as good a place as any to start."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:34:16 PM

"Yeah, it's only logical," he grasped at the excuse immediately, his heart hammering in his chest as he began to rake through Elladan's hair with more sure fingers.

The other had to see through his weak excuse, and yet still had agreed into this. He tried not to read too much into it.

The silence around them shifted from embarrassment to comfort slowly and Kili began to relax as he pulled Elladan's hair back and if his fingers happened to grace Elladan's ear on the progress well... That wasn't his fault.

eloquated4/20/2020, 1:43:36 PMEdited 4/20/2020, 1:43:46 PM

Unlike his twin who was infinitely more brave in love, Elladan hadn't been this close to many people before.  His stomach tugged hotly as Kili's fingers combed through his hair, working out the tiny knots and snarls with little sparks of pleasant pain.

When he grazed over his ear, Kili could almost see the shiver that slid down Elladan's spine, and the tension that tightened across his shoulders for an instant.  "Mmhmm..."  He murmured, finally letting his eyes drop properly closed.

"Logical... I think.."  Elladan paused, drawing a slow breath, and exhaling with a murmur of bliss, "I want one of your curls.  A picture, I mean... All mussed up like the first time I saw you..."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:47:10 PM

Kili swallowed at the words, thankful that Elladan could not see how his entire face lit up with the strength of a blush. He hadn't been aware just how much attention Elladan had paid him when they had met but the answer seemed to be 'more than he thought'.

"It's usually very messy in the mornings after I wake up," he replied softly, starting a small braid with a part of Elladan's hair. "So we'd have to meet up early if you want that."

eloquated4/20/2020, 1:51:34 PM

Out of habit, Elladan tilted his head back a little when he felt Kili start plaiting a small section of his hair.  It was intensely surreal, and he could feel the way the couch shifted whenever Kili moved-- and it would be so easy, so impossibly easy, to just lean into his space, back to chest, and --

And what?  Is he waiting for a signed invitation?  Are you?

"Or I could just find a way to mess you up now."  He murmured, tongue flicking out to moisten his suddenly dry lips, "Or both..."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 1:55:37 PM

His heart leaped at the words and the braid slipped from his fingers, and the way his stomach swooped almost made him feel sick but in a good way. Surely Elladan didn't mean what he thought he meant. There was no way.

Christ, Elladan was going to be the death of him.

"Mess me up?" he repeated, his voice a tad deeper, a tad shakier with nerves as he reached back to Elladan's hair and picked up the half done braid with a deep breath. 

"And how were you going to do that?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:00:16 PM

Did he mean that the way it sounded?  Sure, there was a chance that Kili might like him, it was possible, even if it didn't feel plausible-- but what if he did?  Elladan's quick exhale stuttered across his lips as he shifted, drawing one knee up onto the couch and wrapping his arms around it loosely.

"Yeah.."  He confirmed, not sure if Kili had even the faintest idea what that low, unsteady voice was doing to his insides.  "I guess that depends.. on what sort of messed up I'm .. er... How you'd let me.  I don't want to..."

Yes, apparently he was waiting for an invitation.  Signed in fucking triplicate by eight noble witnesses.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:04:16 PM

Fuck.

Kili exhaled shakily, but couldn't help the smile that spread on his lips at the stuttered explanation. It helped to know he wasn't the only one nervous and now there was the possibility that Elladan felt something for him. Whatever it was, he would take it. Even if there was the risk it would only be a taste.

He pulled the hair back slowly, exposing Elladan's ear before he leaned close until his chest was pressed up against the other's back and his warm breath ghosted over Elladan's ear.

"Give me your best shot."

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:12:10 PM

Elladan was fairly sure his stomach had flipped around entirely, the tension pushing all the air from his lungs in a lightheaded rush.  His eyes widened in surprise when Kili finally closed the space between them-- finally finally.  

"Fuck..."  He murmured, sinking back against Kili's chest.  He could feel the warmth radiating between them, hot with nervously quickened blood.  "Pretty sure that's my cue to turn around and kiss you."

Slowly Elladan twisted, his shoulder shifting across Kili's chest as he half turned to look at him.  Colour flushed high on his cheeks, and his lower lip caught against his teeth, "Unless you'd like to tell me not to?"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:16:57 PM

Christ, Elladan was truly gorgeous wasn't he? The grey in his eyes only seemed more intense combined with the red of his cheeks and Kili found himself captivated as he tug lightly on the other's hair.

"I think I'll be very disappointed if you don't," he murmured roughly, the words thick on his tongue, his heart threatening to jump out of his chest.

"If you think you can mess me up, you have to prove it," he challenged with a crooked grin.

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:22:34 PM

How could he ignore a challenge like that? 

This close, Elladan felt like he was drowning in Kili, his whole world eclipsed by dark eyes and thick curls that just begged for him to comb his fingers through them.  "Me too."  

There was nothing he could do to stop the subtle tremor of nerves when he reached up to do just that, slender fingers carding through his hair and curling through the lush strands.  

Closing the last few inches, Elladan curiously brushed his mouth across Kili's, soft and experimental, and making his lips tingle.  It was just supposed to be one, but two was better.. three was better... five wasn't enough...

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:27:47 PM

The first brush of lips against his own stole all the air from his lungs, and he couldn't stop his body from beginning to tremble as Elladan's fingers curled through his hair and held him close. No kiss before had felt like this; experimental, pure, electrifying.

He couldn't get enough of it.

His hand slid down to rest on the side of Elladan's neck and he leaned closer with a soft sound, his eyelids fluttering close as he returned the kisses, each one growing in length.

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:35:02 PM

It felt like Elladan had been waiting forever for this, suffocating and breath held with nerves-- and finally there was air again, shared in the space between them.  If he had any doubts that Kili had felt the same shock of chemistry between them, he didn't anymore.

Between kisses he twisted around properly, one hand finding home on Kili's chest, fingers splayed to feel the racing beat of his heart under his palm, and the other tangling in his dark curls.  

This is what a kiss is supposed to be.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:40:39 PM

It was easy to let Elladan's weight push him down on the couch and he immediately placed his other hand on Elladan's lower back to hold him close. The weight of the other felt heavenly and grounding at the same time and Kili couldn't get enough of it as he chased Elladan's lips with his own. His other hand still rested in Elladan's hair and he exhaled shakily through his nose, craning his neck to nudge his nose against Elladan's own. 

He was getting drunk on the taste, and knew he could never let a Elladan go again. He could not go long without having another taste, hesitantly brushing his tongue over Elladan's lower lip; a silent ask for permission.

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:48:30 PM

The tiny, still nervous part of Elladan was waiting for it to turn awkward; for them not to fit together, for Kili too pull away, for the couch to be too narrow for two grown men.  

What happened instead was their bodies slotting together, sinking into the soft cushions.  It was the anchor of Kili's warm hand slotted onto the dip at the small of his back with a steady pressure that made Elladan's head spin and his stomach tense.  

Deepening the kiss felt like the most natural thing in the world, Elladan's lips parting and welcoming, curved up at the edges where even kisses couldn't stop him from smiling.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:51:22 PM

This was really happening.

It wasn't a joke or a test, neither one of them were pulling away with an awkward laugh.

Instead the kiss deepened further as he allowed his tongue to slip past Elladan's lips, a small groan mixing into their kiss as he mapped the others mouth with small flicks.

All he could taste, feel and smell was Elladan and the heaven outside could come crashing down and he'd be none the wiser.

eloquated4/20/2020, 2:55:44 PM

The world hadn't ended.  The kiss hadn't broken the tension into awkward shuffling, unable to meet the other's eyes.  Instead, it felt like it had ignited the thing between them, and Elladan was breathless and drowning in it.

Shifting his weight, he slotted his free arm over Kili's shoulder and dipped his head, brushing kisses down the side of his neck.  "M' not crushing you, am I?"  He murmured against his pulse, and paused just long enough to let him answer.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 2:58:47 PM

"Fuck no," Kili gasped tilting his head to the side, his skin breaking into goosebumps as his grip of Elladan's hair tightened. It felt as if Elladan's lips were leaving a trail of fire over his skin and he yearned for more, looking up at the other with darkened eyes.

"Keep doing that?" he requested voice breaking a bit, his cheeks flushed heavily as he ran his other hand up and down Elladan's back.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:07:36 PM

Elladan had never thought of himself as an aural person before, but the sound of Kili's voice sparked in his brain.  He smothered a shallow gasp against his neck, hidden by kisses--  he wanted to make him sound like that, more and forever, and just like that.

"Kili..."  He breathed his name like a precious thing, back arching under his hands.  The hem of his sweater was loose, bunching up in Kili's hands as they moved, and Elladan could feel the cool draft on his skin.  "Fuck.."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:12:16 PM

The smart thing to do would be to stop before they got too carried away, perhaps discuss a bit about what they wanted but god knew he could not pull himself away from Elladan. Not when the other whispered his name like that, pressing more kisses over his skin, moving his body like that.

His fingers graced over Elladan's skin on his back and he took a moment to trace mindless symbols over it, feeling the skin heat up under his touch. He nuzzled his nose against the side of Elladan's face, releasing breathless sounds and pressing small kisses on the smooth skin.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:16:39 PM

He'd never guessed that one kiss could be so intoxicating, that it could make the whole world outside of the two of them vanish.  It was the kind of thing that only happened in movies and books, and Elladan was completely caught up in Kili.

The long curtain of his black hair fell around them when he mapped his way back to his mouth, wordlessly melting under the warm, nuzzling affection.  They should move... should talk... just another minute, one more minute, one more kiss, they could wait that long.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:19:49 PM

"Fuck," Kili breathed out roughly against Elladan's lips, brushing his own against them once, twice, three times. He rested his hand palm down over Elladan's back, holding him closer, refusing to let go.

"You're going to be the end of me," he murmured, trailing the soft kisses down Elladan's throat, tasting the salt of his skin.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:24:09 PM

"Yeah?  Makes two of us.. I've been thinking that all day.."  Elladan laughed faintly, just a huff of breath between kissed.  The weight of his hand on his back, the pressure and warmth, was absolutely electric, and Elladan couldnt imagine wanting to be anywhere else.

His eyes dropped closed with a soft, hitching moan, and he tilted his head to bare his throat.  "I was so sure you didn't... you wouldn't..."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:26:41 PM

"I'd have to be both blind and stupid not to," Kili replied against Elladan's skin, trailing the kisses down his throat and allowing his teeth to lightly graze against him.

"I thought you didn't... Thought I had no chance with you," he added, pressing the flat of his tongue over Elladan's racing pulse.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:29:22 PM

The damp heat jerked a whimper from his lips that would have been embarrassing under any other circumstances.  But with Kili's voice reverberating in his ears, he barely noticed.

"And here.. you thought I was going to hit you.."  He managed a breathy laugh, his fingers tangling in Kili's hair to pull him closer, "And I was so... so distracted by you being... just gorgeous.."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:31:23 PM

"Looks like I'm going to be making a mess out of you instead," Kili teased with a breathy chuckle, the grip Elladan had of his hair pulling a pleased sound from the back of his throat.

Careful nips and licks turned into more daring bites and light sucks over Elladan's neck, the scent of the other making his head spin.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:34:41 PM

He was so pale that his skin reddened easily, leaving a map of where Kili's mouth had been.  He was going to have marks to hide later, and the idea of it made his stomach swoop, heat spilling through his veins.  

"Think it's... it's pretty mutual." He countered, not entirely sure how he could keep talking when it felt like all his blood was rushing away from his brain.  "But.. God... you can try."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:37:09 PM

The way Elladan sounded like when breaking apart was addicting and gorgeous and God he wanted to keep hearing it until the day he died. He wanted to feel him writhe, to hear him gasp and whimper out in pleasure. 

Never one to back away from a challenge, Kili trailed his lips down on the spot between Elladan's neck and shoulder and actually bit down, sucking a proper hickey on the pale skin.

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:45:04 PM

"Ki-ii!"  Elladan's voice properly broke with surprise, crackling up with a gasp on the second syllable of Kili's name.  Nobody had ever had the guts to bite him before, and Elladan's brain shorted out for an instant at the sharp burn of pleasure-pain.  Heat pooled under his skin like a brand, reddening to mark the spot.

Elladan's fingers twisted instinctively in his curls, the thick, soft mass of them completely disordered and mussed.  "And how--" He swallowed, trying to school his breathing into something normal with a laugh, "Am I going to hide that?"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:48:09 PM

Kili groaned as Elladan tugged at his curls again, his scalp burning and tingling in a pleasant way that shot heat straight down his spine. He could not stop himself from giggling and grinning from the other, clearly pleased at the reaction he had pulled out. 

"Why do you think I made it here?" Kili asked cheekily, nuzzling the already purple mark with his nose. "You'll be fine with a hoodie or something else you can zip up."

eloquated4/20/2020, 3:53:15 PM

Laughter helped smooth the raw, rushing edges of new passion, and Elladan dissolved into giggles right along with Kili.  It was a bubbling, effervescent feeling, like he'd never be able to stop smiling.

"It's a 'property of Kili' mark!"  He gasped between laughs, rubbing his cheek against Kili's adoringly.  In truth, he didn't care about covering it, not really; it was like a warm, faintly aching reminder of today.  Proof that this had really happened.

"Are you sure I'm not squishing you?"  He added, already wriggling a little to the side, just in case Kili didn't actually want his gangly self draped over his chest.

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 3:56:57 PM

"Ah don't-!"

Kili grabbed a tight hold of Elladan to stop him from wriggling, his face absolutely burning with humiliation as he avoided the other's eyes. It felt as if every nerve in his body was on fire, and he was painfully aware of just where most of his blood had rushed into and how close Elladan was to being directly over it. 

"Look, you can't just make out with me and think it didn't effect me so please don't wriggle," he rushed to say, hiding his face against Elladan's shoulder.

eloquated4/20/2020, 4:01:27 PM

Elladan stopped short, his eyebrows jumping with obvious concern.  Had he-- oh.  OH.  He wasn't sure if it was the way Kili had just grabbed him, tight and secure and oh fuck, he was in such trouble because he was never going to be able to let go of him.

--  Or if it was the revelation of why he' grabbed him--  That made his cheeks redden hotly.

"Sorry...  Oops?"  Elladan grinned, his thumb gently rubbing small circles just behind Kili's ear.  "It's... If it's any consolation, it's really not just you.  I just have the benefit of being able to... um, hide it easier."  He admitted, trying to equalize the embarrassment a little!

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 4:04:30 PM

He really couldn't stop himself from giggling at the predicament they were in. The giggle turned into a chuckle which then turned itno laughter, his voice muffled against Elladan's shoulder for a brief moment before he allowed himself to relax and flop his head back down on the cushions.

His eyes were dark yet bright and twinkling, lips swollen and hair mussed up and in a single word he just looked completely debauched.

"What a situation we're in, huh?"

eloquated4/20/2020, 4:13:20 PM

They were both warm and flushed, and when Elladan looked down at Kili, he couldn't entirely believe that he'd been the cause of that incredible smile.  It was more than just the physical pleasure of being close to him, it was just... Kili.  That smile, and the way he laughed, and the was Elladan felt lightheaded and completely besotted.

He was sure it was painted all over his face when he leaned down to steal a kiss, tasting the laughter between them.

"Situation:  messed.  You, Kili, are completely mussed up. Just like I promised."  He beamed down at him, and carefully relocated himself into the narrow gap between Kili and the back of the couch.  Gently he brushed his fingers across the disheveled curls and down his warm cheek, tracing his fingertips across the swollen redness of his mouth.  

"I haven't woke up yet, so I'm starting to think I'm not imagining this."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 4:17:06 PM

"I'd say we're both rather mussed up and you look amazing like that," he smiled leaning into the gentle caress of the finger. 

Kili hummed in response to the other's words, lips twitching into a warm smile. "This is all real, I promise," he mumbled against Elladan's finger and he couldn't resist the temptation to curl his tongue around the tip of the finger, winking cheekily at the other.

eloquated4/20/2020, 4:19:34 PM

Elladan ducked his head against Kili's shoulder to muffle a laugh, his hand dropping it settle against the other side of his neck. "This isn't what I was thinking when I invited you over today."  He admitted, the smile audible in his voice.

"But I definitely hoped.  Especially after you accidentally told me you weren't straight!  Up until then, I kept telling myself it was a bad, bad idea to crush on straight guys... I'm so glad I was wrong."

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 4:21:16 PM

"God I still can't believe I did that!" Kili laughed curling his arm around Elladan and pulling him close until they rested properly side by side.

"I was thinking the same thing though. How crushing on a straight guy was a fucking bad idea and would only hurt. Then I had a mild freak out over falling for you so fast."

eloquated4/20/2020, 4:24:39 PM

And that was it, the admission that Elladan hadn't realized he was waiting for.  Kili could feel the roll of tension that ran down his body, followed by a breath of shaky laughter.  "Is that what it is, then?"  He asked, curling tight against Kili's side.

His hand settled over his heart, feeling the beat of it as it raced under his ribs. Elladan was sure he was doing the same.  "Falling for me?"

Mikilieth4/20/2020, 4:28:33 PM

"I'm like... 98% sure I am," Kili admitted nervously, his fingers massaging between Elladan's shoulder blades. The fear that this entire situation could still turn upside down made his stomach flip in a very unpleasant way, as if he was going to be sick.

"I mean... I don't go around kissing just everyone you know."

eloquated4/20/2020, 4:31:30 PM

"Neither do I!"  The words escaped in a a rush, and Elladan tilted his head and arched forward to nuzzle a kiss under Kili's jaw.  "I keep telling myself how could I be falling for you?  We only just met!"

He kissed him again, and Kili could feel the way the muscles between his shoulders had begun to relax, loosened by the admission and his touch.  "But I am.  I just didn't want to assume that you felt the same."

Mikilieth4/22/2020, 3:26:15 PM

"I think I started to fall for you the moment I snapped the first picture," Kili admitted absently, rubbing his thumb between Elladan's shoulder blades.

"I didn't even realise I was taking the picture until I heard the sound of the shutter. It was so loud!"

eloquated4/22/2020, 3:31:51 PM

Slowly Elladan melted into Kili's side, the tension that always lingered between his shoulders (hours spent in a lecture hall, and more still editing videos at a computer would do that!) unraveling under his fingers.  

"I was so sure I'd heard someone, but you didn't say anything!" He turned his head to half smother a laugh against Kili's shoulder, "I thought you were either a serial killer hiding a body, or a figment of my imagination.  Right up until I saw my own face on the overhead!"

Mikilieth4/22/2020, 3:33:48 PM

"I did kind of run away as soon as I realised what I had done," Kili laughed holding Elladan closer, the warmth of the other's breath on his shoulder sending pleasant shivers through his body.

"But I'm glad you ended up being in my class. Otherwise this wouldn't have happened."

eloquated4/22/2020, 3:36:37 PM

Elladan wouldn't have thought the couch was big enough for both of them to lie side by side, but apparently it was perfectly snug if they were slotted in tightly together.  Shifting a little, Elladan curled one long leg over Kili's, his head pillowed more comfortably on his chest.

"I can't believe you ran away."  He grinned, playfully poking his side, "I bet you thought you'd gotten away with it, too!  But.. I'm glad, too.  I was glad about 30 seconds after I said hello to you."

Mikilieth4/22/2020, 3:44:26 PM

"I did!" Kili laughed shaking his head a bit before tipping it back. "I thought I had gotten really lucky to catch someone so beautiful in the forest, and that I got to capture them on the camera."

He grinned, pressing a soft kiss on Elladan's forehead. "Obviously, I'm more content with this outcome. If you're willing.... I'd like to see where this goes."

eloquated4/22/2020, 3:48:00 PMEdited 4/22/2020, 3:49:11 PM

They'd both been frozen through them they got to the apartment, but now?  Elladan felt utterly snug, his wrong body warmed through.  "Guess it makes for a good story.  Not sure how you're going to spin it to your brother, though!"

Every little kiss, every pass of his hands, made Elladan feel light and effervescent, like he was filled with happy fizz.  "If I'm willing?"  He exclaimed, half smothering a giggle, "Kili, I'm trying to figure out how I'm supposed to let you leave tonight!  Of course I'm willing, 110,000 percent sure!"

Mikilieth4/22/2020, 3:54:44 PM

"Unfortunately I can't stay the night, I'm already in too much trouble for skipping the last class," he laughed only to sober up almost instantly with a sheepish grin.

"I might have had a class today but skipping it to be with you was more tempting."

eloquated4/22/2020, 3:57:58 PM

Elladan flushed hotly-- because that hadn't been the way he'd meant it, not entirely, but it certainly was tempting. Rushed, but tempting!  "We both missed class this afternoon, but it's not the end of the world. I mean,..."  He tilted his face up to flash Kili an innocent smile, "It's sort of like an anatomy study.'

"And it's a lot more interesting than my media studies class.  I've about had enough of debating psychological horror and gore."

Mikilieth4/23/2020, 11:26:26 AM

"Anatomy study?" Kili repeated amused, staring at the ceiling with a wide smile. "That sounds like the lamest pickup line of all time," he said with a chuckle, nearly falling off the couch as his phone started to ring in his pocket.

He fumbled to pull it out, grimacing at the screen and mouthed a silent 'busted' before holding it up against his ear.

"Hi bro, what's up?"

He just hoped he didn't sound as breathless as he felt, trying not to giggle like he had been caught well.... Technically he was.

eloquated4/23/2020, 11:30:16 AMEdited 4/23/2020, 11:32:26 AM

Elladan pulled a face when Kili's phone rang, and he had to bite his tongue to stifle a giggle of his own.  "Oops..."  He whispered under his breath, before lapsing silent, his head still tucked against Kili's shoulder.

"So you're not dead.  That's a good start.  And your phone does work.  So I have to wonder..."  Fili's voice on the other end of the line was flat and dry, a sardonic pseudo amusement threaded through every syllable, "Why you're two hours late getting here."

Not that he was worried.  Definitely not.  Because it wasn't as though his brother had a habit of falling ill.  It wasn't as though it was raining like God's own wrath outside.  "I was starting to think you'd drowned."

Mikilieth4/23/2020, 11:43:20 AM

"I could have drowned, I mean it was pretty close," Kili replied grinning, resting his elbow against his knee as he tapped his thigh absently. "I got completely soaked but luckily my photography partner lived close by, so he offered we'd get dry and discuss our project for the school. I lost the track of time and forgot to call, sorry."

He didn't like to make Fili worry, but it wasn't his fault he had gotten distracted.

"I'll be home as soon as my clothes come out of the dryer."

eloquated4/23/2020, 11:48:45 AM

Right, laundry!  With a cheeky smile, Elladan brushed a kiss under Kili's ear and extracted himself reluctantly from their warm tangle on the couch.  Outside the rain seemed to have picked up, lashing against the window with a renewed determination to scrub the city right off the map.

Fili's sigh was audible, and more relieved than he wanted to admit.  He'd never expected this to be his life-- but he'd already lost his mother, and he'd be damned if he lost his brother, too.  Taking Kili in had been, in his eyes, the only option.  But God, he made him worry sometimes!

"You've got a head full of rocks."  He muttered, leaning against the wall of his shop.  Another thing he hadn't expected... but it was a skill, and it paid the bills, even if it wasn't what he would have preferred to be doing!  "You want me to come pick you up?"

Mikilieth4/23/2020, 11:52:12 AM

"That'd be awesome," Kili replied, tone full of graditute. "My bike is still at the school and I'd rather not walk or cycle back home."

He had been soaked to the bone for a long time and the chances his body would succumb to a flu was more than likely. There was a reason Kili usually didn't go out on rainy days, his immune system was wrecked.

"I'll send you the address via message, okay?"

eloquated4/23/2020, 11:56:30 AM

"Alright... text me when you're ready."  Well, at least Fili knew his brother was going to get back home in one piece!  Technically he knew Kili was a grown adult, that he could make his own choices, and it wasn't as though he had a curfew!  But it wasn't like him to just vanish, and on a day like this, Fili's imagination had jumped to the worst conclusion.

Padding back from the laundry closet, the sound of the dryer thumping and rumbling in the background, Elladan dropped down onto the couch beside Kili and arched an eyebrow, "Everything alright?"  He asked after a beat, reaching out for his hand.

Mikilieth4/23/2020, 11:59:00 AM

"Yeah, just my brother worrying," Kili smiled as he put his phone away and took Elladan's hand instead, running his thumb over his knuckles. "There's a reason storms like these makes him uncomfortable and with my immune system being a bit weaker than most it's just a recipe for him to fret."

He smiled a bit, pressing a light kiss on the back of Elladan's hand. "He'll pick me up after the clothes have dried."

eloquated4/23/2020, 12:02:19 PM

"I get it.  The worrying, I mean-- I'm sort of surprised Ro hasn't called, too."  He cracked a smile and sank back into the cushions.  After a moment, Elladan swung his feet up onto the couch and stretched out beside Kili again, even though his heart jittered over a nervous is this too much? beat.

"Better than public transit, anyway.  Your clothes should be done in.. like forty-five minutes?"

Mikilieth4/30/2020, 12:02:43 PM

"Pity that I need to leave so soon, but I really don't wish to worry Fili further," he said sinking his fingers through Elladan's hair, playing with the smooth strands. It felt amazing and unreal that he was allowed to touch now; to have the permission to map Elladan's skin with his fingers.

eloquated4/30/2020, 12:06:27 PM

Elladan had never really thought of his hair as a sensitive spot-- most of the time he didn't pay much attention to it at all, unless it was getting in the way!-- but Kili's fingers combing through the long strands, gently catching on the tiny knots, sent a wash of tingling energy flooding down his spine.

"You make it sound like I'm not going to see you later this weekend!"  He laughed against Kili's shoulder, tilting his head to nuzzle a kiss under his ear, "We've still got this project due on Monday."

Mikilieth4/30/2020, 12:08:37 PM

"I know, but..." he trailed off, suddenly feeling embarrassment over what he had almost admitted. This wasn't the time to go all mushy on someone he had just sort of started dating.

"You're right," Kili chuckled, allowing his head to tip back a bit at the sensation of a kiss being pressed under his ear. "Just have to remember not to brush me hair on the day you want my pictures so you can capture the floof."

eloquated4/30/2020, 12:13:44 PM

"But?"  Embarrassing it might be, but Elladan was far too curious to ignore such a tempting opening!

Twisting onto his side, Elladan tucked his head more comfortably into the crook of Kili's shoulder, his breath warm on the side of his neck.  "Tomorrow? You can come over here, or I can head over to yours, if you don't think your brother will mind.  Ro won't care either way, he'll be working on his paintings."

Mikilieth4/30/2020, 12:16:04 PM

"Mh, Fili is most likely working at the garage, so either works for me," Kili said closing his eyes, the warm breath over his skin sending shivers down his spine. He could hear his own pulse in his ears, the fast racing of his heart making him feel overly sensitive. 

"We could see which one of us is ready first, and then decide where to go?"

eloquated4/30/2020, 12:37:36 PM

Slowly, Elladan fanned his fingers out over Kili's chest, the pad of his thumb smoothing back and forth around his heart.  With the rain lashing against the window he could fall asleep like this, he thought with a dopey smile.  Just like this.

"Mmhmm... That sounds like a plan.  I'm not usually a morning person, but if I get to see you?" Thankfully, his face was hidden along the side of Kili's neck!  "I think I can make the effort."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 11:25:10 AM

"Awww, are you telling me I'm special?" Kili teased playfully, allowing his body to relax further into the cushions. He knew he had to get up soon and get his clothes but surely he could enjoy this moment for couple of more minutes before his brother would bite his head off.

That was one conversation he wasn't sure how to handle.

eloquated6/17/2020, 11:43:55 AM

"If you're not special, that says something about my taste in men!"  Elladan grinned and gently flicked Kili's side, "So I guess that means you have to be special... By default, of course!"

"Is it stupid that you haven't even left yet, and I already know I'm going to miss you tonight?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 11:45:15 AM

"It's not stupid," Kili sighed wrapping his arm tighter around Elladan. "I know I'll miss you too, but at least this time we have each other's numbers so we can keep texting late in the night and then regret it in the morning," he continued with a laugh.

eloquated6/17/2020, 11:56:45 AM

That sounded good... Really, really good. Nuzzling into the side of his neck, Elladan kissed the hollow under his ear, his lips distractedly trailing down to his collar. "And it's only a few hours. It's not like we have to see each other every waking moment!"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 12:01:59 PM

"Mmmh," Kili hummed in agreement, distracted by the soft lips pressing against his skin. It felt easy to let his head tip back, fingers sliding from Elladan's shoulder to rest against the back of his head, instead playing with the strands of hair.

"Some distance makes the heart fond or however that saying goes."

eloquated6/17/2020, 12:13:30 PM

"I'm not sure if you like this, or if you're going to fall asleep on me."  He teased, finally propping himself on an elbow so he could gaze down at Kili.  Long skeins of black hair fell around his face and pooled on Kili's chest, the trailing edges tickling around his collar.  

"Maybe it does, but can't I have my fondness without the distance?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 12:16:04 PM

"I like it," Kili laughed in response, opening his eyes to gaze at the taller man fondly. He brushed the hair with his fingers, twining one of the locks around his fingers before using that as a leverage to pull Elladan closer so he could press a light kiss on his lips.

"It's one night, we can make it. Besides, just think about how much fun we could have with messaging each other," he snickered.

eloquated6/17/2020, 12:19:39 PM

"One kiss and your mind slides right into the gutter!" And by the boyish grin, Elladan had been thinking something similar!  He smiled against Kili's mouth, the whole world feeling so warm and good that he practically oozed contentment. "My spidey sense says that I'm going to have a lot of distracted nights in the near future... Strangely, I couldn't be happier about it!"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 12:23:05 PM

"Can you blame me?" Kili grinned sheepishly, his skin turning a shade redder. "I have the hottest guy of the school in my arms and I'm only a human. How could I not react to that?"

Plus he was a hormonal young adult, give him a break. His mind rested in the gutter so often he might as well make a home there. And now he had someone he wanted, someone who made him feel amazing and wanted in such a short time. It was hard to keep himself in control.

"Good, because I plan to be as distracting as possible."

eloquated6/17/2020, 12:50:14 PM

"Blame you? No.  Enjoy making you blush? Definitely."  Elladan was just leaning down to steal a kiss when their warm, happy little bubble was interrupted rudely by the jarring buzz of the dryer. 

"Ugh, mood killer!" He groused, and kissed Kili anyway, quick and adoring, his mouth curved up in a smile, "Now that's distracting." 

If it wasn't for the fact that Kili's brother was already worried, Elladan would have tried to find an excuse for him to stay... but he was worried. And probably waiting for Kili to call.  "Worst. Timing. Ever."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 12:52:17 PM

"Blocked by a dryer," Kili laughed covering his face with one arm, blindly searching for his phone with the other. Perhaps it was a blessing in disguise, for surely he would have gotten distracted by Elladan and end up worrying his brother again.

While Elladan was picking the clothes, he texted his brother.

Got the clothes, ready for pickup in five.

eloquated6/17/2020, 1:04:04 PMEdited 6/17/2020, 1:04:15 PM

Elladan gathered the things out of the dryer, the fabric still piping hot as he carried it back to the living room in a haphazard armful, "Catch!"  He grinned and tossed the toasty clothes at his... boyfriend?

It sounded strange.. but good-strange.

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 1:05:33 PM

Too slow to react, Kili got hit by the hot clothes and he laughed surprised. "Mmmh, all warm and toasty~" He hummed pleased, hugging the clothes close to his chest.

"Do you mind if I go change in your room?"

eloquated6/17/2020, 1:11:34 PM

"Go ahead, I'll just wait down here."  Elladan waved him off and dropped onto the couch to wait.

Without Elladan there as a distraction, Kili could notice more about the room.  There was the usual mess of odds and ends, as well as a handful of photos in scattered frames-- mostly what looked like family and friends--.  A shiny gold Play button plaque was half hidden behind a precarious stack of books, and a little more camera equipment.

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 1:35:08 PM

Kili tried his best not to snoop around, but it was hard to miss the glint of gold in between the mess of books and what seemed to be parts of cameras. Absently tugging the shirt over his head, Kili crouched down to examine the weird shine more closely and could make out the words YouTube. Was it a project for YouTube? Or school?

He stood back up and struggled to get his jeans on, the warmth enveloping him like a hug and he smiled pleased before returning back to Elladan. "Thanks again for having me over. You really saved me."

eloquated6/17/2020, 1:38:54 PM

Elladan tossed his phone onto the coffee table when Kili returned, and padded over to drape his arms around his neck.  "Don't thank me. Just don't change your mind about this, before tomorrow, ok?"  He asked, his smile just a little rueful.

Maybe it was silly, because Kili obviously liked him.. but would it be the same when he got home and had time to think about it?  Sure, having his picture up there in class had been embarrassing, but he could ultimately brush it off... but this? This would mean outing them both.

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 1:43:54 PM

"of course not," Kili replied immediately, eyes widening a tad at the unexpected words. Why would Elladan even think that? Sure, this was new and there were... Obstacles, to put it lightly. But he wasn't regretting any of what they did.

"You have nothing to worry about," Kili promised hugging Elladan closer, burying his face against his shoulder. Their height different really became apparent when they both stood like this, and he kind of liked it.

"I'll text you when I get home."

eloquated6/17/2020, 1:48:56 PM

Elladan's eyes dropped closed and he pressed his face into Kili's black hair, letting his promise sink in. "You better. Otherwise Im going to worry that you got stuck out in this biblical flood."  

He felt so thin in Kili's arms, his whole body made of fine lines and light bones; but he was warm and real, and there was nothing hesitant in the way he squeezed him close.  "And it's only until tomorrow... we've gotta figure out this assignment, anyway." Which was a good distraction!

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 1:50:53 PM

"I'll try to remember not to comb my hair," Kili teased with a laugh, lifting his head up to press a light kiss on Elladan's lips before regretfully pulling away from the other. He really had to go, least he'd make his brother wait any longer.

"I'll see you tomorrow," he added as he began to put on his shoes.

eloquated6/17/2020, 1:57:34 PM

He tucked his hands behind his back to keep from reaching out to him again (Kili was right, they didn't have time to linger, not with his brother waiting).  "Yeah, tomorrow.  And I'll text you tonight."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 1:59:01 PM

"Yeah," Kili smiled, having to tear himself to wave and actually leave the apartment. The moment he stepped outside he was bombarded with the rain and he cursed as he ran to the waiting car before he'd get completely soaked once again.

"Well, my clothes were dry," he complained ruffling his hair.

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:05:34 PM

Fili smirked over at his brother, and teased a low whistle when he looked up at the apartment building, "So, who are you visiting in the rich people part of town?"  He countered, flicking the heat up a little higher so Kili wouldn't get a chill.

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:06:37 PM

"What do you mean the rich part of the town?" Kili asked confused, holding his fingers in front of the heater. The apartment hadn't seemed like a rich person's place; it was almost the same size as theirs, just a tad messier.

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:09:58 PM

Pulling away from the curb, Fili shrugged, "It's walking distance to the university- that means pricey.  Building with a pool and a gym-"  He jabbed a thumb to the sign outside, "Even more.  Close to the bus route, and the stores? Add extra.  Just because the building isn't fancy doesn't mean your friend isn't paying their tuition in rent."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:13:14 PM

"Honestly, didn't really see or think about all that," Kili shrugged, gazing out of the window at the disappearing building. "I was just thankful they had a dryer and hospitality to take me in for the day."

So, the twins most likely had money more than it seemed. The golden button started to make more sense then. Not that it mattered, he just hoped Elladan didn't think he wanted his attention for that money. Then again, Elladan didn't seem like the type to flaunt around with what he has.

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:14:32 PM

"So who are they?"  Fili gently cuffed his brother's shoulder to keep him from mentally wandering off, "This new friend of yours, you still didn't answer the question."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:15:36 PM

Kili huffed at the cuff, pushing at his brother's hand. "The twins, I don't know their last name. Elladan and.... The other name was similar but a bit harder to say."

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:17:14 PM

That sounded familiar...Fili might work in a shop during the day, but he did tattoos at night, and people talked. Besides, the name wasn't exactly common!  Still.. he couldn't quite put his finger on it. "Guy from class, then?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:19:01 PM

"Yeah, we share the photography class," Kili explained. "We paired up for the next project so we started to plan it while we waited for the clothes to dry."

Even if they did get rather... Distracted by it. At least he didn't have a mark to prove from it, unlike Elladan's neck that had the beautiful purplish bitemark.

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:20:47 PM

Fili had no reason to think his brother was hiding anything, so he simply nodded, "Makes sense...you want to swing by the drive-through on our way home?  I've got someone coming in tonight to get some work done, so I wont have time to cook."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:22:34 PM

"Sure thing," Kili replied, curiosity waking up. "What kind of work are you doing tonight and on who?"

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:24:40 PMEdited 6/17/2020, 3:00:41 PM

"Dwalin, he wants me to finish the rest of that head piece."  It was his creative outlet, but better, it helped pay more of the bills; and with Kili in university (where he damn well should be) Fili could use all the extra he could make.

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:26:10 PM

Kili nodded, pointing them towards their usual fast-food place. "So you'll be working close to the six hour limit again?"

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:27:12 PM

Fili shifted his weight a little, and rolled his shoulder slightly, "Maybe a little longer.  Depends how long it takes. He'll pay extra if I can get it done tonight."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:28:29 PM

Kili glanced at his brother at the movement, his brows furrowing a bit. It seemed like Fili had worked himself to the limit of soreness once again. "At least let me massage your shoulders after dinner, it'll make working a bit more pleasant."

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:30:43 PM

"... Yeah, alright.  Thanks."  He huffed a laugh and turned into the fast food place; he did his best to take care of his brother, but he'd never been much of a cook!  "It's been busy at the shop this week.  If it keeps up, I might have to hire someone part-time."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:32:44 PM

"No wonder! Your the best mechanic in the damn town," Kili grinned, ordering his usual through the com before turning back to his brother. "I could ask around the school, see if there's anyone on the mechanic line who wish to have some extra cash and experience."

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:34:45 PM

"Let me worry about that, you just focus on getting your ass through school, ok?"  Fili turned to his brother as they waited for the people in front of them to get their stuff, his expression turning more serious, "Do you hear me?  Just focus on your grades.. I'll deal with everything else."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:36:30 PM

Kili frowned at that. "But I've been seriously considering getting a part-time job," he admitted. He hated the fact that Fili was giving so much so they could live comfortably and wanted to help the best he could.

"I'm passing my classes, even those I'm absolutely horrible at. I'm doing well, better than well."

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:39:29 PM

"And if you get a job, that's going to change.  You do your work, and I'll sort out the money.  We can talk about changing that when you get out of school; but right now you've got enough to deal with."  And what good was being a big brother if he couldn't let Kili use his brilliant mind for something better than a daily druge?   "Got it, Killian?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:41:40 PM

"No need to use the full name," Kili groaned, pouting his lips in return. "It doesn't feel fair," he complained. "I'm not doing anything that helps with the rent or bills and you're taking care of it all alone."

It wasn't the first time they discussed and argued about the matter, but the guilt kept eating Kili often and sometimes he simply had to let it out.

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:45:20 PM

Fili paid for the food and handed the bags to his brother, stealing a fry from the top.  "Older brother's prerogative."

He lapsed quiet for a moment as they drove, and finally added with a sigh, "I promised Mom I'd take care of you.  You don't have to like it, but that's what I intend to do."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:47:09 PM

"You dropped from school so you could care for me," Kili said quietly, staring at the bag on his lap. "You didn't accept a place in college, you just began working right away. Don't think I'm not thankful because I really, really am, but... I wish you'd let me do more."

eloquated6/17/2020, 2:53:06 PM

He'd had plans, but they'd changed. When their mother was alive, he'd desperately wanted to study music; to make a living with his violin. Which now sat on the shelf mostly, collecting dust. But none that had mattered in the end. He had his brother to take care of, and damnit, he was going to do it properly.  "You do plenty.  You just need to let me worry about those things for now."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 2:57:29 PM

Kili was silent for the rest of their ride home and he quietly collected the bag from his lap before getting out of the car. He was not a child anymore. He had already turned 18, which meant he was almost legaly an adult. Sure, he could not buy his own alcohol or smoke or anything like that, but he could get a decent job if he just searched.

But he couldn't do that behind his brother's back.

He just had to come up with something else.

"Come on then, let's eat and get those shoulders of yours back in order."

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:01:02 PM

"Now that's something you can definitely do." Fili shrugged off his jacket and held it over his brother's head as they darted from the car to the apartment, shivering when the rain went down the back of his neck. "After burgers, I'm starved."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:02:57 PM

As if on cue, Kili's stomach growled loudly and he laughed. "Same here," he agreed toying his shoes and jacket off, releasing a soft sigh as he walked in the kitchen to unpack their bag. The scent of the food made his mouth water and he hummed under his breath as he sat by the table and pulled his phone out.

Would it be too early to text Elladan already? They had just seen each other.

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:04:25 PM

Fili hung his coat by the door-- contrary to popular belief, their apartment didn't look like a frat house!-- and reached into the fridge to grab the mustard for his fries.  "So what were you and this Elladan doing all afternoon?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:05:34 PM

"Discussing the project," Kili replied quickly-- perhaps too quickly. "We're supposed to practice photographing and modeling people, so we tried to come up with what we wanted to focus on."

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:06:38 PM

"Uh huh..."  Well that was definitely too fast.  Especially when the rushed reply came before his brother had taken a bite of his food. Hmm... "So he's going to model for you?  Think you can make it look good?"

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:07:49 PM

"Duh," Kili rolled his eyes and wiped the mayo from the corner of his lips. "I have one of the highest marks in the class, I know what I'm doing. Of course it helps that Elladan is rather photogenetic, so I think he doesn't need much help to look good in the photos."

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:10:03 PM

"So your assignment is to ogle pretty boys through a lens?  Sounds like just your kind of work!"  He smirked and stole one of Kili's fries before sinking down at the table, grateful to be home and off his feet for a few minutes!

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:11:57 PM

"Oh shut up," Kili replied flustered, dipping his fries in the pack of ketchup that came with the meal. "I'm just saying, it'll be an easy assigment. We have to focus on the whole person or then certain body parts and apparently he wants pictures of my hair of all things."

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:13:33 PM

"Must be crazy, then!"  Fili leaned over and tugged one of his brother's curls straight, before letting it spring back into place, "Either that, or he's got a crush on you.  Even if you got mom's curly mop."

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:15:43 PM

Kili nearly choked on his fry, coughing violently before hastily grabbing the cup of soda, swallowing greedily. He felt more and more flustered by the second and he waved his hand in a dismissive manner. "Or it's the easiest part to photograph."

eloquated6/17/2020, 3:23:01 PM

Bingo! “Breathe, Kili! Jesus...” He laughed, giving his brother a few thumps on the back, “Guess that answers my question about whether you like him, though!  Come on, spill.”

Mikilieth6/17/2020, 3:41:03 PM

"Can we not do this," Kili whined embarrassed, feeling as if his face was completely in flames. Count on his brother to find out so quick.

eloquated6/18/2020, 6:54:43 AM

Fili chuckled at his brother's flailing, bemused by the startling colour of his embarrassment, "What kind of brother would I be if I didn't? So!  Tell me about him, Kee; I already know you like him, but I'm a bit short on why."

Mikilieth6/18/2020, 9:58:32 AM

Kili groaned in defeat, burying his head in his hands. "He's just... Gorgeous," he admitted softly. "He's witty and funny and can keep up with my humor. Seems to even like it."

eloquated6/18/2020, 10:05:03 AM

It had always been a matter of time before Kili met someone, so it didn't really come as a surprise.  Fili nodded as he listened, chewing on his fries, "So, are you actually going to tell him?"

Mikilieth6/18/2020, 10:14:40 AM

Kili fumbled with his fries, his face turning even redder if possible. "... Maybe? I don't know," he circled the question.

eloquated6/19/2020, 8:46:22 AM

That was hardly an answer! Fili's smile faded a little, and he reached over to jostle his brother's shoulder, "Hey, you know you can talk to me, right?  Long as you're happy, I don't care."

Mikilieth6/19/2020, 8:49:01 AM

"I know," Kili mumbled embarrassed. "It's just... We're kind of aware we both like each other."

eloquated6/19/2020, 5:11:28 PM

Fili cocked an eyebrow in amusement, and leaned back in his chair, "No problem then.  I'm not going to give you a hard time, Kee."  Not today, anyway!

Mikilieth6/20/2020, 7:17:42 AM

"That's a lie and we both know it," Kili snorted before laughing, wiping his fingers in the napkins. "How about I buy your silence with one of my awesome massages?"

eloquated6/21/2020, 8:45:09 AM

Washing down his last bite with a swallow of soda, Fili nodded with a huff of laughter, "Thanks, Kee... I think even my knots have knots.  And Dwalin'll have my hide if I fuck up his head piece."

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 8:47:07 AM

"That one would be hard to cover," Kili agreed as he got up and circled around the table cracking his fingers. "You really need to allow yourself more breaks between work."

eloquated6/21/2020, 8:48:52 AM

"Then I need days with more hours in them."  Fili rubbed his hands over his face, trying to chase the tiredness away, "Don't worry, I'll get caught up, I always do."

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 8:49:43 AM

"Do you have time to nap before Dwalin arrives?" Kili asked concerned, laying his hands on his brother's shoulders and immediately wincing. "This feels horrible, you should take better care of yourself."

eloquated6/21/2020, 8:52:00 AM

Fili was stronger than he looked; he was hard and compact, and the muscles under Kili's hands were were locked and tense.  "Didn't I just tell you not to worry?"  He laughed, trying to loosen his shoulders with an ineffectual roll, "Nobody ever died of knots."

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 8:53:29 AM

"With your luck, you'll be the first case in history," Kili chuckled as he begun to work on the knots, kneading the muscles under his hands with practiced movements. It wasn't the first time he had helped Fili with his locks and it surely wouldn't be the last time either.

eloquated6/21/2020, 8:56:15 AM

"Don't jinx it... Im too busy to die."  He muttered around a groan. 

Kili hadn't been at it more than a few minutes when the door opened with a knock (Dwalin never had been the sort of wait for them to answer it!).  Dwalin towered over the two, and dropped into the chair on the other side of the table.

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 8:57:41 AM

"You're gonna have to wait till I'm done with my brother before he gets to work on your head," Kili stated as a greeting, feeling one of the knots pop under his fingers. "Least you want shaky lines, heard  those are in right now."

eloquated6/21/2020, 8:59:34 AM

Dwalin frowned and slouched back in his chair with a grumble, making a show of looking at the clock over the stove.

"You're almost an hour early."  Fili pointed out without opening his eyes, feeling the hot release of the trigger points, "And Kee's right, you don't want fucked lines."

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 9:02:05 AM

Good, that meant he had more than enough time to work Fili's back into a better condition. He was silent as he worked, unknotting the muscles part by part until he could feel the heat of the blood warming the skin. "Drink some water, it's important so you won't feel faint from the blood rushing to your head."

eloquated6/21/2020, 9:03:54 AM

"Since when he did turn into your mother?" Dwalin asked with a gruff note, arms crossed over his chest.

"I will." Fili promised, and finally cracked open an eye to give their friend a flat look, "Watch it, or I'm going to ink Hello Kitty on your head."

Mikilieth6/21/2020, 9:05:09 AM

"Please ink a hidden message in his scalp that states he's just a big bully," Kili requested with a huff. Dwalin was and sometimes seemed like he didn't care about others, but he knew it was just a shell. In reality, Dwalin was a huge softie with a soft spot for the brothers.

eloquated6/28/2020, 8:07:13 PM

Dwalin rolled his eyes at Fili's laughter, but in short order the two of them were getting ready to start the tattoo.  It was a dramatic piece, and Fili was rightfully proud of it.

Back at his apartment, Elladan tried to work on some video editing, but found his attention drawn back to Kili distractedly.  It all seemed a little surreal, if he was being honest-- half of him expected to find out he'd imagined it all!

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 8:43:59 PM

Was it too soon to text Elladan? Probably, but a part of him didn't care as he laid down on his bed and pulled his phone to his chest, hesitating for a short moment before typing out his message.

"Is this the moment I'll ask what you're wearing?"

eloquated6/28/2020, 8:46:38 PM

Elladan jumped when his phone chimed beside him, Kili's name flashing up on the screen.  "Jesus.." He muttered, heart beating fast as he fished his phone up from the blankets.

< I'm pretty sure the correct answer is something sexy.>

< But actually just the same stuff as earlier, plus an extra coffee stain because I tried to carry too many things at once.>

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 8:59:50 PM

The response made Kili laugh and he rolled over on his back.

< Mh, well you looked good in those clothes so I think I can forgive a stain or two. >

eloquated6/28/2020, 9:03:46 PM

Unaware that Kili was doing the same thing, Elladan pushed his laptop to the side, before stretching out on his back and smiling up at his phone.  So, not his imagination, then.  Good.

< I was actually trying to get some work done.  But surprise surprise, I kept getting distracted by thoughts of you. >

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 9:17:50 PM

Kili bit on his lip and grinned, feeling like a giddy teenager. Thank god no one could see him now.

< oh, sounds saucy! What kind of thoughts? >

eloquated6/28/2020, 9:20:37 PM

< Less saucy, more embarrassing! >

Elladan thumbed the edge of his phone nervously, before giving himself a mental kick and adding:

< Mostly hoping this afternoon wasn't my imagination. >

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 9:37:38 PM

< it wasn't. >

The response was almost immediate, and Kili smiled to himself. It felt relieving to know he wasn't the only one uncertain of they could talk of what they've done.

< I'd like to have more days like that. Minus the rain. >

eloquated6/28/2020, 9:42:57 PM

< If you say things like that, I'm going to turn totally mushy on you. >

Alright, more accurately he already was-- but at least he was resisting the urge to say it!  Swinging his feet over the side of the bed, Elladan absently paced around; restless and all butterflies, slowly cleaning his room just for something to occupy his hands.

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 9:46:23 PM

< And how is that a bad thing? >

He could picture Elladan's flushed face in his mind and grinned, fingers tapping on the edge of his phone. The taller man was so adorable with his flushed cheeks and wide eyes, and that just reminded him of how he had looked earlier that day during their sudden making out and--

< BTW, what did you brother think about your necklace? I think purple really suit you. >

eloquated6/28/2020, 9:50:47 PMEdited 6/28/2020, 9:50:52 PM

< You're such a smug jerk, you know that?  xoxo >

Elladan refused to look in the mirror as he passed, kicking a few things in the general direction of the closet.  He knew he was blushing, and he was distracted enough!

< He asked if you were worried you wouldn't be able to tell us apart, so you decided to brand me. >

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 9:52:43 PM

< He has a point! Wouldn't want to accidentally smooch him! >

Of course he had to tease the other a bit, since Elladan basically kept giving him ammunition for it.

< I'm allowed to be smug because I'm the reason you made those pretty noises ~>

eloquated6/28/2020, 10:02:01 PM

< Hopefully one twin is enough for you!  I love Ro, but I don't know if I want to share my boyfriend with him. >

He hit send and stopped, looking down at his screen for a long, perplexed moment.

< That's the first time I've written that.  Feels weird. >

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 10:04:07 PM

Boyfriend?

In any other situation those words would have made him balk and feel uncomfortable, but now he realized his heart was practically leaping in his chest and he could feel his own skin burn.

He hesitated with his response, but the anxiety growing in the pit of his stomach made his fingers send the question. 

< Bad kind of weird? >

eloquated6/28/2020, 10:07:27 PM

< Not bad at all! >

He texted back quickly, before Kili could get the wrong idea.  Ignoring the fact that he was sure he was blushing (because if Ro noticed, he'd be amazed) Elladan padded down to the kitchen to make a new cup of coffee. 

< Just sort of... wow.  Ok. Exciting.  But also, seriously don't want to screw it up.>

Mikilieth6/28/2020, 10:08:52 PM

Kili released a breath he wasn't aware he had been holding. "Way to scare me," he chuckled quietly.

< I know what you mean. It feels so new and fragile and I don't want to mess anything up. >

eloquated6/28/2020, 10:26:47 PM

< That makes two of us. But it's probably a good place to start, right? >

Not that he had any experience in the matter!  People tended to be drawn to Elrohir, who was the more outgoing twin.

< How am I supposed to take your picture tomorrow?  I don't think I'll be able to keep my hands off you.  And I'm pretty sure those aren't the kind of pictures we want to send the professor!>

Mikilieth6/29/2020, 12:55:48 PM

< We can take breaks so we can make out like the teenagers we still technically are.>

The thought made Kili's stomach flip.

< We could make a game out of it. >

eloquated6/29/2020, 5:58:13 PM

< A game?  What sort of a game? >

Just the idea of taking a break from his work to make out sounded both silly, and incredibly tempting... more the latter,if he was being honest!

Mikilieth6/29/2020, 6:03:32 PM

< Simple, we see which one of us has more self control while we take those pictures. Of course, the one being photographed would do their best to make the others concentration snap. >

eloquated6/29/2020, 6:05:44 PM

< You know, that sounds like the kind of game I wouldn't mind losing.  But it might be the only way we get anything done tomorrow!  At least if it's a challenge, I won't be completely putty in your hands.>

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 10:52:58 AM

< Exactly. I'm very competitive and not willing to lose. >

At least, he'd try not to. But Elladan was proving to be quite the distraction.

eloquated7/1/2020, 10:57:15 AMEdited 7/1/2020, 10:57:22 AM

Elladan tried to picture what Kili might be doing at that moment, but without an idea of what his apartment looked like, the image was vague and blurry.  Probably best not to fantasize anyway, not if he wanted to get anything done tonight!

< Now I just have to figure out which three parts of you I want to photograph. And how!  I have to make you look good, since you've already exhibited a picture of me! 😛 >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:00:41 AM

Kili grinned in response, fingers flying over the keyboard.

< Just remember that the pictures  have to be pg 13! If you want another kind of picture, I'll be the one sending it to you ;p >

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:02:51 AM

"Fuck..."  Elladan exhaled when he looked down at the screen, feeling a little warmer.

< And there goes my ability to get anything done tonight!  Or potentially ever again. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:06:30 AM

The response pulled a laugh from Kili's lips and he felt oddly flattered, his cheeks warming up a bit.

< Oh? Then just maybe I'll have an upper hand tomorrow~ after all, it was so easy to make a mess out of you today! >

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:10:00 AM

This was definitely not a conversation to have in the middle of the kitchen! With a goodnight to his brother,Elladan retreated back to his room,distractedly thumbing back a text.

< If being a mess means you can't keep your hands off me?  I volunteer as tribute! >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:12:02 AM

< And now I am thinking very improper thoughts, thanks for that. >

He groaned pressing the phone against his forehead, willing himself to count to twenty.

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:16:33 AM

Elladan knew he should behave; after all, this was new and he didn't want to screw it up. But making Kili distractedly hot was... really, really tempting.

< New rule : You can't say that without giving me the details! >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:21:12 AM

Kili's face flushed further and he nibbled at his lip anxiously. Perhaps it would be stupidly soon to discuss such things already, but for Christ's sake they had barely kept their hands to themselves earlier. It was clear there was mutual chemistry and want between them.

< Just thinking about all the ways I could distract you tomorrow. >

He sent the first message, wondering how to word the following one.

< If you'll blush as prettily if I am to bite your ear when correcting the position for the picture, or if you'll bite back a gasp if I am to accidentally brush my leg between yours. >

There, that was good, right? It wasn't super vulgar but clear to the point and hopefully not enough to scare Elladan.

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:25:41 AM

In truth, Elladan hadn't expected him to reply, not like that-- not with actual details that made him feel flushed and wanting.  With thud he dropped onto his bed, reading the messages a few times before he realized he had to actually reply.

< Fuck >  

Said the first, his thumb accidentally hitting the send button in his haste.

< I'm pretty sure I'll still be blushing tomorrow. >

< Do you have any idea how much I want to see you right now?  I knew I'd miss you tonight, but this is crazy. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:30:28 AM

The short response was enough to make Kili cackle, having to silence it against his pillow even if he was sure Fili would not hear him over the sound of the tattoo machine.

< Well I can help with that! >

Feeling coy and rather playful, Kili lifted his phone up and took a quick picture. His dark curls were framing his head wildly, his face still a light color of red and lips grinning at the camera. He sent it fast, before he could think twice.

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:35:11 AMEdited 7/1/2020, 11:35:18 AM

The picture felt a bit like being sucker punched, Elladan's heart quickening at the glittering, mischievous eyes and the curve of his mouth.  

< Again I say.. fuck. >

< How did I not notice you in class before? You're gorgeous, and I want to kiss you so badly right now. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:38:00 AM

< You sat behind me. >

The reply was cheery and teasing, and Kili smiled dopedly to himself. Just reading those words, the reaction he got from the other sent his heart stuttering.

< Just the night between our reunion. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:39:52 AM

< You send me pictures like that, and want me to be patient until tomorrow? >

< Cruel, wicked, teasing you! >

Elladan knew he was grinning like an idiot, but there was nobody else to see... Nobody to laugh at him!

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:43:47 AM

< And what are you going to do about it? >

It was a teasing taunt, and he has to rub his own cheek as it was starting to ache from the continuous grinning.

< It could have been a completely different kind of a picture, I think that would have been a proper tease. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:47:09 AM

Never let it be said that Elladan backed down from a tease!  And over the last few years he'd spent a lot of time on camera; so before he could second guess himself, he flipped up the hem of his shirt and hooked his thumb in the waist of his jeans, dragging down the material playfully.

< I haven't decided yet. > 

He texted back,sending the picture with it.

< I'll decide when I'm less distracted. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:51:10 AM

The phone slipped from his fingers and hit him square on the face. He scrambled to get a hold of it, drinking in the picture greedily.

< Fucking hell. >

He licked his lips, feeling his mouth dry up.

< Fucking... Are you trying to kill me? >

< I want to bite that piece of skin over your hip bone. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 11:54:55 AM

That was so much better than any reaction he'd dared to hope for.  It felt a bit like playing with fire, but the chemistry ran quick and hot between them, undiminished by distance.

< Not kill you.  Reminding you why tomorrow seems unfairly far away! >

< And if you keep making comments like that, I'm going to need a cold shower. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 11:59:09 AM

< Two can play that game. >

He wasn't going to let Elladan get the upper hand, he was too competitive and stubborn to go down without a fight. A quick change of position had him on his knees, the hem of his shirt between his teeth, his other hand in middle of undoing to the button of his jeans.

He sent the picture, followed by

< You're not the only one who can tease. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 12:09:50 PM

Elladan's mouth went suddenly dry when he opened the message, blood rushing south.  It was a small miracle that he didn't drop his phone right off the side of the bed, but it was a near thing!

< I'm not sure if this is a game we both win, or both lose. >

< But fuck... >

< I was supposed to be getting some work done tonight, and that's definitely not happening now. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 12:12:31 PM

< I'm not even sorry. >

< And like you're actually complaining. >

Victory. At least for the moment.

eloquated7/1/2020, 12:34:57 PM

< I'm not complaining! Definitely not complaining. >

< You just make it hard to think when you send pictures like that. >

Elladan toyed with the edge of his phone case for a moment, before gathering up his nerve and adding:

< I'm not used to wanting someone this much, or so suddenly.  It's amazing, but sort of overwhelming. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 12:37:04 PM

< Come on Ell, you're making this too easy for me. I mean thinking isn't the only thing I'm making hard for you, am I right? >

He snickered, a soft smile spreading on his lips.

< But I know what you mean. I'm kind of scared about how easy this is with you and I like it a lot. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 12:44:41 PM

< You'll have to find out for yourself tomorrow!  I cant make it that easy! >

Curling onto his side, Elladan propped his phone against his pillow, occasionally glancing back at the photos Kili had sent him.  

< I keep telling myself there's no reason to rush, cause I don't want to freak you out. >

Mikilieth7/1/2020, 12:46:41 PM

< you're not freaking me out. I promise. >

He understood Elladan's concern, for he thought about the same things.

< At the same time I want to be careful and yet also find out absolutely everything about you in every way. >

eloquated7/1/2020, 1:04:41 PM

< I don't have anything to hide!  Maybe we should ask questions since we can't be together tonight? >

< Cause I think we're going to be distracted tomorrow! >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 6:44:59 AM

< Alright sounds like fun! What kind of questions are we talk about though? Wouldn't want to misunderstand anything. >

eloquated7/7/2020, 9:16:57 AM

Elladan stretched out on his bed, passing his phone from one hand to the other while he read. 

< You can ask me anything, I don't really have any big secrets. >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 9:21:26 AM

Kili thought for a moment.

< What do you enjoy to do during your spare time? Aside from daydreaming in the forest. >

eloquated7/7/2020, 9:23:26 AM

< I have a yt channel with my brother, that takes up most of my spare time!  We're usually filming or editing.  Which was what I was supposed to be doing tonight! >

Elladan added a silly little emoji to the end, and considered his response.

< Have you told your brother about us yet? >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 9:25:16 AM

Oh, that certainly explained the gold button he had seen! But wait, wasn't that like... An award, in YouTube community?

< He kind of guessed that something was going on but I didn't tell him everything yet. >

< Are you guys any good doing videos? Maybe I should search for you guys then. >

eloquated7/7/2020, 9:29:47 AM

< Same with Ro, I'll tell him later but right now he's pretty focused on other stuff. >

Well that was a more difficult question!  Elladan thumbed the edge of his phone; he wasn't embarrassed that he'd mentioned it, but what if Kili thought it was all silly?  Elladan knew it was, but it was still something he worked hard at!

< Well enough!  It pays the bills, and it's more fun than mopping floors for a living! >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 9:33:11 AM

They were good enough to get actual monet from it? Christ, he had a feeling Elladan was selling himself short. He definitely had to look them up now!

< So is that why you picked up your current major? Wanting to learn more? >

eloquated7/7/2020, 9:34:56 AM

< Pretty much!  It started as a high school film project, and we had so much fun we started making our own.  Originally I was going to be an english major, do script writing or something, but I like this more. >

< What about you? Why'd you take this? >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 9:43:19 AM

< I've always enjoyed photography. I started when I was young with one of those old film cameras. I wanted to capture the world as I saw it, show beauty and joy when everything in the world seems to go to shit. >

eloquated7/7/2020, 9:45:16 AM

< Wow... Yeah, you win, that's a pretty awesome answer. >

<So, is it just you and your brother?  I've got a little sister, too, but she's back with my dad. >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 9:52:49 AM

Kili smiled ruefully. He knew the question had to come at some point.

< Our parents passed when I was a child. It's been just us ever since, as Fili took me under his wing so I wouldn't be taken to a foster home. It's a long story but that's why Fili freaks out when there's a huge storm and I'm not home. >

eloquated7/7/2020, 10:46:33 AM

In retrospect, that made so much sense.  Elladan sighed and tucked one arm behind his head, trying to wrap his head around what that would be like. 

< Damn... I'll remember that.  But at least you've still got each other. >

Mikilieth7/7/2020, 10:49:03 AM

< I owe him a lot. >

< Anyway, what's your sister like? >

eloquated7/7/2020, 10:50:56 AM

< Arwen?  I haven't seen her since last summer, but she's alright.  She's thirteen, and my dad's favourite, mostly because she's the only one still at home!  Plus, baby of the family. >

Mikilieth7/13/2020, 11:30:18 AM

< Well she's the youngest and also a girl with two big brothers, of course she's the baby. >

< It's starting to get late but I really don't want to stop talking with you. >

#murkhith

[breaniebree]

This one is for @lmwhite1086-blog 

Flashback Sequence -- Chapter 148

Tonks and Remus’ cottage

Master bedroom is a mix between the two, the dark teal walls of the bottom one, with the bed and carpets of the top one.  Harry’s bedroom is the navy for when he stays with Remus (not as much as he used to).  Huge shower with lots of jets in the bathroom and the bright living room.  Forest is the back garden.

[Excerpt] 

Harry used the Floo to get there, stepping out into the living room, surprised to see the changes.  The former gold room had been painted an off-white and the dark oak of the wooden ceiling accenting Remus’ warm brown leather sofa.  The old sofa had been made to look new with bright throw pillows in white, pink, and blue.  The honeyed hardwood floor had a large white berber area carpet that covered most of the living room floor and under the coffee table was a bright pink fluffy rug that punched the colour into the room.  The one wall was covered in dark brown picture frames showcasing photos of Remus and his parents, the Marauders, Remus and Harry, Tonks, Ted, and Andy, and of Remus and Tonks.  Sheer white lace curtains covered the large front window.

The circular coffee table in the centre of the rug had a white marble top, framed in dark brown and glass with a few of Remus’ favourite books scattered across the bottom.  The big wooden shelf was against another wall, full of books, with a new big white suede armchair with bright pink and bright blue pillows.  The old television and VCR sat on a dark brown table across from the couch.

He found Charle in the kitchen, which had been newly painted in a soft white.  The olive green backsplash with the stainless steel appliances looked great with the olive green cabinets and the honeyed brown hardwood that was in every room of the house except the bathroom.  The kitchen had been completely remodelled and Harry almost didn’t recognize it.  Charlie was putting away green dishes in the cupboard when Harry walked in.

“Hi, Charlie, the place looks great.”

Charlie turned to smile at him.  “Hi, Harry.  I have to agree.  The colours they chose really work.  Tonks is in the bedroom.”

Harry nodded, shoving his hands into his pockets.  “How is she?”

Charlie made a so-so gesture with his hand.  “Unpacking and settling in is helping.  I let her take me shopping yesterday which was absolute torture.  Do you have any idea how many different kinds of china there are?  Five hours, Harry, five!  In the end, she chose this simple, but tasteful green stoneware dinner set.”

Harry grinned.  “Sounds fun.”

Charlie rolled his eyes.  “Not.  But it kept her occupied and it kept her busy which has been my goal.”  He nodded towards the kitchen table.  “She also picked out that green and white striped table liner.  That bowl belonged to Remus’ mother, I guess.”

“Yeah, it did,” Harry said, eyeing the white and oddly shaped bowl with green vines painted around the edges.  “I think she made it.  This table was here too.”

“It matches the kitchen well.  Everything was painted and done, but the bathroom renovation was finally finished on Friday.  Tonks is just finishing up the final touches on their bedroom.  She finally finished getting the bedding and then she just has to finish settling in.  But the place is done.”

“I’m glad.  Uncle Rem was really looking forward to living with her.”

Charlie nodded towards the bedroom.  “She’s in there.”

Harry left Charlie in the kitchen and turned to head to the master bedroom at the back of the house.  He walked into the room, smiling at the two white walls and the two bright teal walls, the large king-sized four poster sleigh bed that now sat in the middle of the room resting against one teal wall, the big window on the right side.  A teal and silver duvet covered the bed with white, teal, silver, and black throw pillows.  A black faux fur blanket draped diagonally over the end of the bed.  The silver bed curtains were tied back with a teal and black knotted rope.  Two tall dressers, one on either side of the room.  The honeyed hardwood was covered in one large white area rug with silver stripes.

A large ornate mirror with a black frame covered part of one white wall with small framed art photos in black and white of a forest taken in each season.  Harry recognized the trees as belonging to the Welsh forest behind Remus’ cottage.  There was a picture of Remus and Tonks from Christmas of last year framed on the nightstand.

“Tonks, it looks amazing in here!  You did a great job.”

She smiled at him from where she was folding her clothes and carefully inserting them into the dresser and hanging them in the closet.  “It does, doesn’t it?  I wanted bright colours.”

“They look great.  Uncle Rem is barely going to recognize the place.  This room alone looks way better than it did.  I like the bed.”

She smiled.  “Yes, he will.  It’s just some new paint and a new bed.  The dressers are new too, but Rem and I took those photos on the wall; the leather couch out there isn’t new, nor is the bookshelf.  I bought the frames for all of his photos as he never hangs them.  The kitchen was completely remodelled, but that was what he insisted on.  You know I don’t cook so I could care less, but he wanted all state of the art stainless steel appliances.  We chose the green to match that bowl his mum made in her pottery class.  Sorry, I’m rambling.”

“I like the pink rug in the living room,” Harry told her.  “It’s totally you and you’re not rambling.”

She chuckled.  “I had it in my flat and I was going to throw it away, but the pink pillows looked so good on the sofa, I thought that I would just lay it out on the white carpet beneath the coffee table and see and it just popped; made the room so much brighter.  Have you seen the bathroom yet?  Other than the kitchen, it’s the most changed.”

Harry shook his head as he followed her into the bathroom.

“We made it bigger as you can see, just took out that wall of wasted space at the end of the hall and made it into the bathroom.  The shower has six shower heads, two on each wall and it’s absolutely heavenly when you shower.  One of the blokes at work was talking about it and I thought how great it would be for Remus to have that, especially after a full moon, how good the water would feel on his aching body.  He doesn’t know about this, it’s… well, I just had it done on Friday.”

Harry smiled at her.  “He’s going to love it.”

She smiled back and scratched her nose.  “We kept the big clawfoot tub just moved it over here and as you can see, the black marble tile gives a nice touch to the navy backsplash.  The white adds a little brightness.”

“It looks really good, Tonks.”

She took his arm and tugged him into the smaller bedroom where a double bed was, a dresser, a nightstand and the walls covered in Quidditch posters.  “I repainted in here last week.  I kept the same grey tones, I just wanted to spruce it up a bit.  Just because I’m moving in here doesn’t mean anything, Harry.  This will always be your room and you can come over and stay whenever you want.”

“What about when you make me a godfather?”

She blushed, “That is not going to be happening any time soon so you just shush — this is your room.”

He kissed her cheek.  “Can I stay in my room tonight?”

Tonks only raised her eyebrow.  “Why?  I don’t need a babysitter, Harry.”

He shrugged, grinning at her.  “I was thinking more along the lines of a movie night?”

Tonks smiled at him.  “Are you checking up on me, Harry Potter?”

Harry grinned.  “Me?  I would never.  What do you say?”

Tonks smiled brightly at him.  “That sounds perfect — on one condition.”

Harry merely raised an eyebrow.  “Oh?”

“I want to watch movies with lots of explosions and action.  I want nothing that will make me cry and nothing that’s too happy, got it?”

“Like I’d choose anything else,” he said making her laugh.

Tonks beamed at him.  “And you’ll cook?”

Harry only rolled his eyes.  “Do you think that I’m going to let you try to cook in that brand new kitchen?”

“Okay listen here, smart-arse, this is my house now too!”

“Exactly and I’m sure that Uncle Rem would like it to still be standing when he comes home.”

Tonks simply shot up two fingers and he laughed.  

#a second chance #breanie #harry potter fanfiction #remadora #remus and tonks #harry potter

[laruna]

— epiphany.

characters. lim yuri, kim namjoon, etc.

word count. 19.4k

genre. angst, fluff, friendship, slow burn

warnings. mentions of colorism and homophobia, family issues, arguments

summary. lim yuri keeps a long record of epiphanies, many of which concern a very special kim namjoon. and maybe accidentally falls in love in the process.

December 14, 2007. Lim Household. Seoul, South Korea.

An epiphany is an experience of a sudden and striking realization.

Lim Yuri learned that in English class today. Admittedly, it was the first time in that class that she’d actually heard a word she didn’t know. English was the only language her parents both spoke, so it was all she ever spoke at home. Naturally, it had always been a subject that she breezed through until today.

Normally, she wouldn’t think much of it, but today was the last day of school before the holiday break, her teacher has very cruelly given her class over-the-break work. It’s not like it was anything hard, just the simple task of reciting an epiphany you’ve had over the holidays in perfect English to the class. Unlike most of her classmates, the English wasn’t the hard part.

Yuri has never been very fond of sharing things about herself. She’s always found blending into the background made every aspect of her life easier, so sharing a sudden realization that she’s had sounds like it’ll imply a lot about her. She figures that she’ll just make a list. At the end, she can choose.

Epiphany #01: I look different from the other kids.

She’s not quite sure if that one counts. It’s not something she’s suddenly realized, after all, especially just over the break. It’s something she’s known for a while now, slowly having come to realize it after all the little moments piled up. It’s in everything—the way the other kids in class look at her unless she keeps her head down, the way people talk to her in English first like she’s a foreigner, the way her aunt tells her she has the skin of Jeju and Busan’s beach girls. At first, she’d taken that last one as a compliment, but her aunt had run to the bathroom to give her a bottle of skin lightening cream before Yuri could say anything. Which was mortifying, to say the least.

Sometimes she does wish she lived in Busan instead. Even though her father grew up there, he never seems to have anything good to say about the city, always opting to badmouth everyone he left there instead. He tells her she should be grateful to live in Seoul where the people only say bad things when you’re not around, because they’re blatant about that kind of thing where he’s from. He tells her that the Looks she gets here in Seoul are soft and easy on her. Busanians are too honest.

She doesn’t say it out loud, but sometimes Yuri thinks Seoulites aren’t honest enough. Her mother always tells her not to care too much about what other people think, but she feels like it’d be a lot easier if people just insulted her to her face so she doesn’t have to worry about what they say about her behind the scenes. Is it worse than the insults she comes up with in her head? Is it kinder? Is it pitying? Do they see her and then think nothing at all?

She wishes she didn’t even have to think about these things at all. Sometimes she envies her brothers, because they get treated better than her. Her parents tell her it’s because they look more Korean, but Yuri has no idea what that could possibly mean. She thinks her classmates are distinguishable when she looks at them. They have different shaped eyes and faces and skin tones. Her differences are a smidge more obvious, to be sure, but she doesn’t see why it should be something that affects her social life as much as it does.

But at the end of the day, it does, so Yuri does her best to cause as little problems as possible. She doesn’t meet with her brothers to walk home together until they’re three blocks away from school so that people don’t know they’re related and start picking on them too. 

Her older brother isn’t happy about it, but he understands. He wishes she didn’t have to, but knows that it’s better this way. He apologizes to her for the ‘colorist, xenophobic, homogeneous society’ they live in. Yuri doesn’t understand what any of those words mean, but she nods along anyway.

Daniel, her poor angel of a little brother, doesn’t get it at all. He doesn’t think there’s anything wrong with her. Her heart breaks a little when he says that he wishes his noona would wave back at him when they pass each other on campus. 

Yuri’s mother comforts her with the thought that if she lived in the Philippines, where she’s from, she’d be considered very beautiful. But she doesn't live in Busan or the Philippines. She lives in Seoul. So, being the weird-looking kid it is.

Thankfully, she’s not entirely isolated. Even if her parents aren’t kind to each other, they’re kind to her and she knows they love her very much. And even if the kids from the music program she’s in with her older brother make a couple of insensitive comments from time to time, but for the most part, they’re nice as long as she does her part and sings her songs—that’s what brings her the most joy.

Despite everything that goes on in her life, it’s music that constantly remains her greatest love and comfort. Her older brother, Kyunghee, must feel the same way, because he’s always cooped up in her room with her and making music when their parents are arguing again and he doesn’t want to deal with it since his bedroom is right next to theirs. 

If there’s anything positive to be gleaned from it, it’s that they have something to bond over that isn’t the yelling that comes from upstairs. Over time, he’s even taught her a thing or two about music. She can’t compose anything on the piano like he can, but he’s taught her the basics of beat-making on some cracked version of GarageBand he pirated from the internet.

For whatever reason, he’s been really into hip-hop lately, so that’s what they’ve been making beats for. She can’t blame him, though. As a VIP, she’s kind of in the same boat. The fiery bars and pure charisma of the Kwon Jiyong was too much for a music-obsessed teenage girl to resist. It’s a little more personal for Kyunghee, though. 

Shin Donghyuk is her brother’s best friend and a self-proclaimed underground rapper, despite only beginning to rap around a year ago. He’s not terrible or anything—the dude’s actually gained a good following since he began uploading his freestyles to Hiphopplaya and Jungle Radio. 

Still, Yuri finds it a little bit suspicious that he started rapping around the same time her brother started producing. She can’t help but wonder if Kyunghee began producing to help Donghyuk’s budding rap career or if Donghyuk started rapping because Kyunghee started making beats he could rap over. It’s like the chicken or the egg question.

It’s none of her business, she supposes, but Yuri’s still curious about their dynamic. All she knows is that, around school, she never sees one without the other, and that they’re always cooped up in the music room. She never approaches them because her older brother always looks like he’s in his own little world when he’s with Donghyuk and interrupting would make her feel like an interloper.

Her brother doesn’t seem to mind introducing them now, though. Today is apparently a big day for Donghyuk, because he’s going to be performing at a rap showcase at some club in Hongdae. Yuri thinks that it’s weird for them to be inviting fourteen year-old boys to clubs, but her brother assures her that the whole event is for rapping, so there’ll be no drinks around. So she guesses it’s okay.

“I’m, uh, not sure, though,” he admits to her on the subway. “But don’t drink anything that anyone gives you. Don’t drink anything at all, actually. But don’t be uncool about it, either. Just—don’t embarrass me in front of Donghyuk, okay?”

“Okay,” Yuri says, rolling her eyes. Donghyuk is a figure she’s only seen in passing, but hasn’t actually met. Despite his friendship with her brother, he’s never been at their house, but when Yuri remembers the way her parents’ arguments resound through the walls, she can’t blame her brother for never inviting him over. She also can’t blame him for escaping to his friend’s house after school, sometimes. His escape is usually her bedroom, but sometimes it’s too loud even in there.

Hongdae Station, Seoul, South Korea.

Yuri clings to her brother’s arm as they get off the subway station, and she can practically feel him vibrating in excitement to see his friend. Donghyuk is at the venue early like all the other performers, so they’re meeting him there. She makes it clear that she doesn’t get what all the fuss is about.

“It’ll be exciting to see him in action,” is all her brother says. “You’ve only heard recordings, no? And you’ll get to hear all the other underground rappers that use our free beats and stuff, too. So look on the bright side! Even if their rapping sucks balls, it’ll be funny. Plus, it’ll be a good networking opportunity if you ever wanna go into entertainment. If they look important, just pretend to like it.” She snorts at his insincerity.

“How business-savvy of you.”

Yuri has to squint when they finally get into the club. It’s dark and it’s loud, as one would expect, so she holds tighter onto her brother’s arm in the hopes that she won’t get lost. It was so bright outside, but the atmosphere inside makes it feel like it’s nighttime. If it weren’t for all the yelling, she would probably think of it as calming.

“Kyunghee! Over here!” she hears a voice call over the crowd, and turns to see a figure that she can vaguely make out as Donghyuk. Before she knows it, she’s being dragged all the way across the room towards the stage, muttering awkward apologies every time she bumps into someone.

Yuri’s dizzy once her brother makes a stop, tuning out the niceties and conversation he has with Donghyuk to gather her bearings. She doesn’t snap back into reality until she feels her older brother clap a hand down onto her shoulder.

“This is my sister,” he says, and she waves awkwardly. “I’ve been teaching her beats and stuff, too. I think we used one of hers on your last mixtape…? Her beats are under GLASS. You better get good, because I think she’s been learning more than you have.” 

So her brother is helping Donghyuk learn how to produce, too. Makes her feel a little less special.

“Luna, right?” he asks, snapping her out of her thoughts. “Weird name. Sounds like a video game character.” He puts his fist out. She’s flushing at his bluntness, but awkwardly bumps it, anyway. She’s trying to be polite and not embarrass her brother, after all.

“Oh, that’s what my brother and mom call me,” she explains, “Everyone at school calls me Yuri.”

“Makes sense. I just used Luna since that’s what Kyungie calls you,” he explains, and Yuri feels a little surge of pride at the fact that her brother talks about her to his friends. “Want me to call you Yuri, then? You probably get called that more by your friends and stuff, right?”

“I don’t really have friends,” she admits, wincing as soon as the words leave her mouth, because honestly, that sounded a lot less sad in her head. Donghyuk doesn’t seem to notice though, because he’s practically howling with laughter.

“Fuck, Yuri, you’re funny!” he laughs, clapping a hand down a little too forcefully on one of her delicate shoulders. She winces again at that, but nervously laughs along like it’s a joke and not just… her life. She also accepts Donghyuk’s bestowment of the name Yuri. It’s just a name, but maybe it’s his way of telling her that he’s her friend now. Which is kinda nice.

He seems nice enough, but he’s too brash and loud and blunt for Yuri to comprehend how he could possibly be best friends with someone as soft-spoken as her Kyunghee. Still, she’s glad her brother has a good friend, even if her current interactions with Donghyuk are kinda weird.

“So,” Kyunghee interrupts, having had enough of the awkward atmosphere. “You said in your text they wanted help with sound check?” Seems a little trashy to make teenage boys help out with this kind of thing, Yuri thinks.

“Yeah,” Donghyuk confirms. “They can only have three people in the sound booth, including the guy who’s already there. C’mon!” Kyunghee looks all too giddy as Donghyuk grabs his arm and drags him away, probably to the aforementioned sound booth. In the moment, he looks too carefree to be her worrywart of a brother.

“You can handle yourself, yeah?” he yells out to her as he’s being dragged away. He doesn’t wait for her to answer before he’s out of earshot.

“Totally,” Yuri says sarcastically to herself.

Alone, she finds herself weaving through the crowd again. Without her brother around, she finds herself easily slipping in between everybody thanks to her small stature. She takes in soft lights and harsh voices as she makes her way towards the seats by the entrance, which seems a bit more void of people. Everything around her is too stimulating right now. Soft lights. Harsh voices. 

Yuri’s almost there when she bumps into a tall male figure. She looks up to see sharp eyes narrow at her, so threatening and intense that she almost jumps back. His street clothes help up the intimidation factor, along with the dark beanie concealing his jet black hair.

“Sorry,” she mutters. He doesn’t reply, gently shoving her out of the way before continuing to trudge along his weird, bendy path. She watches as the big guy bumps into a few other people before coming to a realization.

“Hey!” she calls out to him, and he whips around to narrow his eyes at her (again), which she now realizes is more of a squint than a glare. “Are you looking for your glasses?”

His eyes soften, gaze immediately turning away from her in embarrassment.

“N-No!” he sputters, but the way he says it makes it very obvious he’s lying. She really doesn’t know why she’s attempting to help this guy out in the first place. Either she feels bad, or she just wants to be right. 

Probably the latter, if she’s being honest.

“If you admit it, I’ll help you find them,” she says.

“...I lost my glasses.”

They’re probably a sight to see, the tall boy squinting down at the ground with Yuri practically glued to his hip, finding a much easier time seeing with her contacts and closer proximity to the ground.

“How’d you lose them anyway?” she asks, and he sheepishly rubs at the back of his neck.

“It was in my back pocket,” he explains. “To be honest, I didn’t even realize I’d dropped them until I reached for them and they weren’t there.”

“Why weren’t you, like, actually wearing them?” she asks, matter-of-factly.

“I’m rapping soon,” he says like that’s an explanation. “It won’t help my image.” 

“Oh, ugh.” 

“What?” he says.

“Are all you rap dudes like this?” she asks, “Just swallow your pride and don’t hurt your eyeballs trying to look cool. If your rapping is good enough, it doesn’t matter if you look like a loser or not.”

“Gee, thanks,” he says sarcastically.

“Look, I didn’t mean it like that,” she defends herself. “You don’t look like a loser and there’s nothing wrong with glasses. I think the only person who seems to have a problem with it is you.”

“Name one successful rapper with glasses,” he retorts.

“Swings,” she says immediately.

“Shit,” he mutters, and she laughs at him. “Oh, fuck off.”

“Hey, be nice!” she huffs. “You’re a complete stranger and I’m helping you find your glasses. For all I know, you could be leading me outside to kidnap and murder me. Heck, I don’t even know your name!” He rolls his eyes as she points this out, but answers, anyway.

“Namjoon,” he says.

“What?”

“That’s my name. Namjoon,” he repeats, stretching out a hand. When Yuri takes a look at it, she realizes just how big he is. His hand would absolutely dwarf hers. 

“Yuri,” she says formally. When she steps forward to shake his hand, she feels her foot clink against something and hears the light sound of plastic sliding across the floor. “Oh, your glasses!” 

The lenses are thick, she notes as she picks them up. Damn, no wonder he was bumping into everyone. His vision must suck. Other than a few scratches on the lenses, they seem fairly undamaged. Even so, she gently blows a warm breath onto the lenses and wipes them off with the sleeves of her hoodie. Less gently, she pulls Namjoon down by the strings of his hoodie so that they’re at eye-level with one another before putting his glasses back on his face. Even in the low light, she can see the embarrassed flush across his cheeks.

“Thanks for the help,” he says sheepishly, quickly straightening up and pulling away. “Gotta go now. It’s showtime.” And then he’s off.

“Who the hell says ‘it’s showtime’ out loud?!” she yells after him, not ready to give this guy a break just yet. 

“Who the hell wears their jacket like that?!” he turns around to yell back. Involuntarily, she pulls on the side of the puffy down jacket she leaves hanging off of her body. When she flounders for a response, he just laughs at her, a deep, loud thing that booms over the chatter of the crowd. She bets the sound could fill the whole room if it were empty.

She looks away, embarrassed, when she notices people are seating themselves and quickly plops herself down on the nearest seat. Well, shit. It really is showtime.

A lot of the rappers are vaguely familiar to her, and she’s struck with the realization that names she’d only seen online now have actual physical forms. They’re obviously passionate about what they’re doing, and now she kind of feels bad for how her and her brother used to roast whoever they deemed ‘the worst ones’ from behind their computer screen.

When Donghyuk steps up, the host introduces him as Suprema—yes, like the hype beast brand. She shivers as the Douche Chills overtake her body. Despite his overwhelming teenage boy-ness, he’s pretty okay, or at the very least, better than she expected. But the bar was pretty low, if she’s being honest. Kyunghee probably thinks the world of his skills, though.

The only other familiar face she sees is introduced as Runch Randa, and she has to stop herself from cooing at how cute she finds the stage name. She also has to stop herself from rolling her eyes all the way into the back of her head when she realizes he’s not wearing his fucking glasses.

As much as she wants to clown on him, she finds herself speechless when Namjoon steps up to the mic and spits straight fire, his narrowed eyes making him look all the more intense. While he’s not quite as aggressive as some of the other rappers she’s heard, his lyrics are riddled with wordplay and double-meanings that it takes her a couple of seconds to wrap her head around.

She’s snapped out of her reverie when she hears the crowd cheering, prompting her to clap along. Thoughts of Runch Randa dissipate as the next act steps up. She doesn’t quite recognize the name or face, so she lets herself get lost in the music without predisposition. When she recognizes one of her beats being used as background music, her heart beats a little bit faster.

Yuri knows that posting them online for free means lots of people will use them, but it’s another thing to actually see it in action. The amount of amateur rappers, good and bad, using her music and appreciating what she does for them makes her feel all warm and fuzzy. Huh. Maybe that’s why Kyunghee enjoys helping out Donghyuk with his rapping endeavors so much.

By the time the show is over, she’s warm and happy, but also very drained of energy. She has half a mind to head backstage to search for her brother, but the thought of swimming through the moving crowd makes her nauseous, so she heads outside instead. Kyunghee will find her eventually.

It’s dark when Donghyuk and Kyunghee finally come outside, laughing over ‘some newbie’s shitty freestyle’ with their arms slung over the other’s shoulders. They talk animatedly about what they liked and hated on the walk to the station and in the subway. Yuri nods along to the conversation despite having been tuned out for a while now. The only thing in her head is music. In the moment, something about that feels very important.

Epiphany #02: Music is something Lim Yuri wants to do for a long time. Maybe forever.

January 12, 2008. Starbucks, Seoul, South Korea.

Ever since that show in Hongdae, Yuri’s been more in love with music than ever. Naturally, she’s thrust herself into it with a passion, making new instrumentals when she’s at home and working on improving her vocals with the kids from her music program when she isn’t. Other than that, though, she hasn’t exactly left her house. Not until today, at least.

Apparently, she wasn’t the only one meeting new people at that Hongdae show—Donghyuk and Kyunghee had done a good amount of networking backstage, exchanging numbers and starting a group chat with a bunch of other underground rappers. In time, they decided that the others were cool enough to work on music with in-person. So here they are, Yuri and Kyunghee spending their last Saturday of winter break waiting for everyone else to arrive.

Suddenly, Donghyuk enters with a very familiar figure in tow.

Namjoon grimaces as soon as he makes eye contact with her, and Yuri has to bite her lip to hold in her laughter, because damn, this dude really sucks at keeping a straight face. Neither action goes unnoticed, it seems, because Donghyuk sweeps his gaze back and forth between the two.

“You two know each other?” he asks, and Yuri nods, a devilish grin on her face. Namjoon’s expression of anguish only deepens when Donghyuk adds, “Oh, nice. Is he cool?”

Namjoon sends a nervous glance her way, looking like a kid who’s just been caught doing something he wasn’t supposed to do. It endears her, for whatever reason, so Yuri spares his pride.

“Yeah,” she giggles, unable to hold her laughter in anymore, “Yeah, Namjoon’s cool.” His body relaxes at that, but the tips of his ears still glow bright red.

“Hey,” Kyunghee says, nudging her arm. “He’s our age. Don’t go talking to him casually, now. Show some respect.” She rolls her eyes, but obliges.

“Namjoon-oppa,” she corrects herself, and he smiles, looking a bit too satisfied at that. Maybe it’s because now he has something to hold over her head, too. It lowkey makes her want to smack him. Before she can say anything, though, two slightly less familiar figures walk through the door,

They introduce themselves as Hunchul and Ikje, or by stupid-teenage-boy-rap-name, Iron and i11evn, respectively. Yuri finds both monikers considerably cooler than Suprema and Runch Randa, if she was being honest. The guys themselves, though, are a lot less cool.

Ikje is twenty, which is like, okay, weird. It makes sense when Donghyuk cracks a joke about him being a little drunk when they exchanged contact information. What kind of twenty year-old was keen on hanging out with a bunch of fourteen year-old boys and one of the boy’s twelve year-old kid sister? He’s a little immature, to be sure, but passionate about rapping. And that’s what everyone is there for, so she lets it slide purely because he doesn’t seem like a creeper.

Despite being the same age as her brother and everyone else, Hunchul does seem like a creeper.

“You’re Glass, right?” he asks, shaking her hand. “I’m Iron. Our names kind of match, right?” 

“Um, yeah, I guess,” she says, forcing a laugh. Awkwardly, she continues, “My big brother chose the name for me… because my name is Yuri… and that sounds like glass.”

“Big brother?” he asks. “Kyunghee is my age, you know. How old does that make you?” Her cringe reflex nearly kicks in, infinitely uncomfortable at this point.

“Thirteen next month,” she answers honestly, and fights the urge to cringe when he pats her head. As touch-starved as she is, she’s not this desperate.

“Ha, cute,” he laughs. She doesn’t think he’s very funny. She’s always prided herself on her instincts, and something about Hunchul just feels off.

Thankfully, she doesn’t have to deal with him for long. The group all converses for a while, but soon enough, they’ve all kind of splintered off into pairs for conversation. As expected, Kyunghee’s first pick for this is Donghyuk. Naturally, she gravitates towards Namjoon.

“Hey, glasses guy,” she says, and he flushes.

“Oh God, please don’t let that become a thing,” he says, wrinkling his nose.

“Sorry,” she says, even though she really isn’t.

“It’s fine,” he says, scratching nervously at his face. “I actually wanted to thank you again for that. I lose things a lot and my mom probably would’ve killed me if I lost my glasses.”

“Oh, it was nothing,” she assures him, but the gratitude still has her glowing.

“I should probably thank you for producing, too,” he continues, “When your brother said you were a 96-liner in our group chat, I was so surprised, because I recognized your account name since I’d used your beats before, since they’re free and all. You’re really talented.”

“Oh,” Yuri says softly, covering her flushed cheeks and wide smile with her hands. Her glee is soon apparent when she fails to hide a giggle, preening under his praises. Her voice goes small when she finally replies, ducking her head. “Well. You’re very welcome.” He laughs at her sudden bashfulness.

Conversation continues smoothly, even if it’s mostly about music. The atmosphere emanating from their little group in the cafe is warm and lively. Even when the barista has to come over to tell the group to simmer down, she can’t find it in herself to be upset.

She hasn’t had many friends in her life, but the way things are going, she feels like she will soon. She makes a mental note to add it to the list when she gets home.

Epiphany #03: Lim Yuri is capable of making friends, after all.

January 16, 2008. Lim Household, Seoul, South Korea.

It’s been two days since school started back up, but it already makes Yuri want to claw her eyes out. She ended up just bullshitting that English assignment and spitting out some shit about how she had an epiphany about platypi being the only mammals to lay eggs or something.

But for whatever reason, she’s still adding onto that epiphany list. Kyunghee catches her adding onto it one night and says that she probably likes it because it gives her life more structure. She tells him it’s not that deep, bro. 

But maybe it is. Who knows. She adds it to the Epiphany List, just to be safe.

Epiphany #04: I like things that give my life structure.

Her mind jumps to the very turbulent, very unstructured family life they have at home, and thinks that maybe he might be onto something. Thankfully, it’s not that bad today, but her parents are still not speaking to one another and shooting each other passive-aggressive stares from across the table, thinking their kids won’t notice. If she had the balls, she’d tell them how obvious they are.

Unfortunately, her younger brother Daniel does have the balls. When he opens his mouth to speak, their mother must sense the impending bullshit, and quickly interrupts.

“How was school?” she asks, turning to Kyunghee—easily the most diplomatic of the three of them.

“It was good,” he says, “Classes were good. Friends were good.”

“Any friends in particular? Of the romantic variety?” she teases, poking him a couple of times in the side. Their mama loved gossip too much. Everytime they brought it up, she’d say I’m Filipino, I can’t help it! Gossiping is in my blood! Yuri and Daniel roll their eyes fondly at her antics—usually, Kyunghee would be doing the same.

But he doesn’t.

“Uh, n-no,” he stutters. Kyunghee always stutters when he’s lying. There’s a beat of silence before Kyunghee answers. Their mother looks entirely too pleased with the fact that after what has to be the thousandth time of asking about this topic, her hunch is finally right.

“Subtle, hyung,” Daniel snorts. “Way to be fuckin’ obvious.” Their father reaches over and pulls at his ear.

“Don’t curse, Jaeyeol,” he says. Daniel shrinks in his seat.

“Sorry.”

The rest of dinner is tense, their dad having successfully killed the vibe. They wash their dishes and clear the table in awkward silence, every action done hurriedly so they can get the fuck out of there as fast as possible. Afterwards, everyone else files back into their respective rooms, but Yuri follows her older brother instead. Fer and her older brother are both in middle school, so she’s curious if she knows whoever her mom was teasing him about. Always too nosy for her own good, she’s determined to find out. Maybe it’s that Filipino blood her mother was talking about.

Kyunghee doesn’t think much of it when she follows him back into his room. Maybe it was because of the age difference, but he was always closer to her than he was to Daniel, just like Yuri was always closer to Daniel than he was to Kyunghee. Her coming into his room to talk about stuff—especially music, these days—was commonplace. He pays no mind as she flops onto his bed, making his way over to sit at his desk and turn on his computer instead.

“Soooo,” Yuri says obnoxiously, just as a little sister should. “Who is she?”

She was expecting Kyunghee to roll his eyes at her like he always did, not quite spilling the deets but dropping little hints and hoping she’d dig enough to get it. But there’s none of that—instead, he presses his lips into a thin line and shakes his head.

“Drop it, Yuri,” he says through clenched teeth, turning around in his seat to glare at her. His tone is so sharp that she can’t help but to curl in on herself. He must see the fear in her response, because his expression immediately softens.

“Look, I’m sorry, just—just forget about it. It’s nothing, Yuri, okay?” he sighs. Normally, she wouldn’t ask her older brother to do anything he didn’t want to, but Kyunghee isn’t normally this secretive with her. Naturally, she’s more than a little curious. Butting into other people’s business was her favorite pastime, after all.

“I won’t judge, I promise,” she assures him, “Everyone likes someone for a reason, you know? I promise I won’t laugh or anything, even if she’s a total weirdo—”

“It’s not a she, Yuri.” He’s turned back to his screen by now, but even just from his profile Yuri can see the flush of mortification on his face.

“Wait, that means…” she trails off and everything clicks. “Oh, oppa.”

“This isn’t something you can help me with,” he cuts her off tersely. “This isn’t something you can understand. Just—just go to your room, Yuri.” He sounds like their dad. It makes her feel small.

Regardless, she nods, plodding along back to her room with a heavy heart. When she gets there, she sits at her desk and opens up her journal, adding another bullet to her epiphany journal.

Epiphany #05: Sometimes you won’t be able to understand what someone is going through, no matter how hard you try. No matter how hard you want to.

January 18, 2008. DGBD Club, Hongdae, South Korea.

It’s moments like these that make Yuri remember that, oh yeah, these rap clubs are still clubs.

Ikje is the only one of legal drinking age, so he’s the only one downing alcohol on the opposite side of the club. Hunchul is sat right there next to him in the corner of the bar, handing the bartender more and more money so he can witness his friend get absolutely shitfaced. Unlike Ikje, he is not of legal drinking age, but that will not deter him from seeking entertainment in any way he can… even at his friend’s expense. Meanwhile, Kyunghee and Donghyuk mess around in soundcheck and Namjoon looks to sit as far away from Ikje and Hunchul as he can get. 

It’s kind of endearing, she thinks, the way Namjoon is so straight-laced about these things, despite his ‘hard’ underground persona. Outside of it, he comes off as kind of a stickler. Maybe a little dweeby, but it’s why she trusts him more than the others, so she pays it little mind when he situates himself next to her at the opposite side of the club so he’s not alone.

Poor Namjoon, her low self-esteem weeps for him. Having to kick it with Kyunghee’s annoying kid sister.

He’s nice enough, so she supposes he’s good at humoring her. Kyunghee would kill him if he was anything but polite to her. That, or the more likely possibility that he’s being nice because this is a business transaction, which makes sense, too. She’s just here to be the producer to his rapper, the Kyunghee to his Donghyuk… minus the lifelong friendship part.

She doesn’t know why talking to him is so daunting when they spoke extensively in the group chat—which she is very proud to say she made her brother add her to last Sunday—so it’s not like they’re strangers. She didn’t love the vibes in there, but they never did anything to make her feel like she was on the outskirts of it all. That’s something she’s imposed on herself. She just didn’t know what to talk about in the chat if it didn’t have to do with music.

She tries not to think much of it, distracting herself with the notebook in her lap. In it, she takes little notes on all the different rappers and indie artists she sees performing throughout the night. On top of her writing it in English, she doubts anyone would understand the references and shorthand she uses, so she makes little move to cover it when Namjoon leans over and squints at it.

“Nosy,” she chides playfully.

“Sorry.” He pulls away with a flush. “What are you writing about?”

“Oh. It’s just like, an analysis, kind of? Of everyone’s different rapping styles,” she explains. “Like flow and lyricism and genre and stuff like that. It’s kind of just for me. I produce better if I know who I’m producing for and how they sound, y’know?” He nods.

“Yeah, that makes sense,” he says. Leaning over to peek at it again, he adds, “Your handwriting is nice, by the way. I didn’t know you were so good at English.”

“Yeah, my brother and I are both fluent,” she says, looking down at her hands. “We speak it at home. But like, I’m no good with words, so I’d be no good for songwriting help or whatever. I don’t know. It’s dumb. I’m dumb. I’m fluent in two languages, but can’t speak like… in general. That’s why I’m a beatmaker and not a songwriter.” 

Oh God, she rambled.

Namjoon is staring right at her when she looks back up. She forces herself not to look away—that would be suspicious, right?—despite the probing, unreadable expression on his face making her cheeks heat in embarrassment. Conversations between them rarely strayed into personal territory, especially when their whole relationship was about music. In her head, she repeats the phrase business transaction over and over again like a mantra. She can’t help but feel like she’s crossed a boundary.

“If it helps any,” he offers with a grin, “My mom’s trying to get me to learn English by making me watch Friends. I can’t make out what your notes say quite yet, but I like to think I’m getting pretty good.” Yuri laughs at that, surprised but relieved.

“You strike me as a Chandler,” she says. “Maybe a Ross.”

“I’ll have you know that I’m very offended by that second accusation,” he says, but he’s still smiling. She giggles into her hands.

“Sorry,” she says, despite not being very apologetic at all. “If you ever need help with English stuff, you know. I’m here.”

She doesn’t know why she says that, but it feels right. It feels like something a friend would say.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” he says, “I’d like that.” That feels like something a friend would say, too.

They very coincidentally spend the rest of the night talking about Friends. They both agree that Ross is a douchebag and that Rachel deserves better. They talk and talk until it’s closing time and the club owner starts yelling at them to just say goodnight and go! Before kicking them out. Everyone stumbles out of the door bursting with laughter, with even shitfaced Ikje giggling drunkenly as he hangs off of Kyunghee’s shoulder.

They’re still laughing even as they run through the streets in a frantic attempt to catch the last subway. Yuri can’t help but think that it feels just like those teenage coming-of-age movies, the ones where they go to high school parties with red Solo cups in their hands. It almost feels like a dream, a fantasy that she never thought she’d get to have.

Namjoon lets her hold his hand so he can drag her along as they run, seeing as her short legs don’t allow her to keep up with the others. She wonders if it’s the cold night air or the way that he links their fingers together that make her cheeks flush.

Epiphany #06: Lim Yuri has a friend.

March 15, 2008. PC Bang, Hongdae, South Korea.

Okay, so maybe Kim Namjoon is not necessarily a friend, per se.

Not to say that he’s unfriendly, or that he doesn’t want to be her friend, but friendship is the kind of thing that develops slowly, right? They’d only just started hanging out recently, after all, and the age and gender difference was bound to make forming a meaningful friendship just a little bit harder.

At this point, though, he’s definitely more than a business partner. Maybe not a friend just yet, but more than just an acquaintance. He feels like a classmate, a peer. Her answering his texts asking for help with English homework has definitely helped with that, as of late. Conversations have continued to stay outside of personal territory, especially when the others were around. 

While Friday nights were reserved for rap performances at DGBD Club, Saturdays were for going out somewhere that they could work on music together or just chilling and hanging out together. They rarely ever met up on Sundays, which were reserved for Yuri helping her mom at her job of doing vocal training with the weird musical theater kids. For Kyunghee and Namjoon, Sundays were cram school days, and for the others… she didn’t really care how the others spent their Sundays, if she was being honest.

As of today, they’ve decided to migrate to a PC bang since there’s a distinct lack of baristas yelling at them to shut up. Plus, if they want to take a break to play MapleStory, they won’t have to worry about the club or the cafe having a shitty bandwidth. 

They’ve got a two-person-per-computer policy, and Yuri finds herself immediately paired off with Namjoon. She doesn’t feel like pairing off with her brother—his energy has been kind of awkward around her since his confession—and she doesn’t like the rest of the guys’ vibes, so Namjoon it is.

They’re stuck away from the others, the only available computers in the PC bang spread far away from each other. She notices he’s talking to her a bit more freely. Self-consciously, she wonders if it’s because he’s embarrassed to talk to her around their friends or if he’s intimidated by her older brother breathing down his neck.

“Do you not like them?” Namjoon asks, out of the blue.

“Huh?” she says, blinking a couple of times in surprise. “Who? What? What are you talking about?”

“You know,” he says. “The others. Hunchul and Donghyuk and Ikje-hyung and them.”

“I don’t dislike anyone,” Yuri huffs, maybe too defensively. “I just—I don’t know. I mean, I don’t like them, but it’s not like I dislike them.”

“Why though?” he asks. “Did they do something weird?”

“No, nothing like that,” she assures him. After a long while of thinking, she admits, “I just don’t like their energy, I guess. I get weird vibes from them, you know?” Namjoon scoffs.

“You shouldn’t pass that kind of judgement without reason,” he says. “You’re smart. Use your brain.”

“I’m not really that smart,” she laughs nervously, ducking her head to hide the flush on her cheeks. “I only use my brain, like, thirty percent of the time.” He laughs at that. For whatever reason, it feels like victory.

“C’mon, don’t say that,” he says reassuringly, “You come up with like, five new beats a week.”

“That’s different!” she argues. “Producing is more… subjective? Than words and lyrics and stuff, I mean. So you can just go with your gut to see if it sounds good or not. You don’t have to think too hard like you do when you write lyrics. Putting stuff into words is hard. Feeling my way through stuff has worked for me ‘til now, so I’m gonna keep doing that.” He shakes his head at that, but relents.

“You do you, I guess,” he says. “But I think I’d choose going using my brain over my gut any day.”

“Did you use your brain when you were bumping into everyone at the club ‘cause you lost your glasses? Or were you using your gut?” she asks cheekily. “It kinda seemed like you were using neither, if we’re being honest.” He rolls his eyes before leaning over to flick her on the forehead.

“Shut up,” he laughs, a flush on his cheeks. When he turns back to the computer screen, she can see his profile from where she’s standing next to their desk. She notices something she hadn’t before, and it makes her realize she’s never quite seen him grin so long. She lets out a little gasp of delight.

“What?” he says.

“Nothing.” 

He furrows his brows at her response, but doesn’t press it any further, either. When she gets home, she gleefully adds her newfound discovery to her list.

Epiphany #07: Kim Namjoon has dimples.

It’s an unexpectedly cute addition to the hard rap persona she’s always envisioned him with.

May 17, 2008. Lim Household, Seoul, South Korea.

“Holy shit, this place is nice,” Donghyuk whistles as he takes off his shoes.

Yuri is not exactly thrilled about Kyunghee inviting everyone over to their house.

Chilling together at PC bangs and the DGBD Club was one thing, but inviting these people into her home was… not ideal. She didn’t exactly love being vulnerable around other people, so she considered her house a safe space to do just that. Having guests over makes her feel like she’s in school again—and just like when she’s in school, she would prefer to be blissfully ignored.

Thankfully, she is. The boys are all switching between fucking around on her and her brother’s shared MIDI keyboard and kicking each other’s asses on Kyunghee’s copy of Super Smash Bros. Brawl for Wii. She also gets to stuff her face, so she supposes it’s not all that bad. Their mom had made way too much food, impossibly happy that Kyunghee was finally bringing friends home. It was unprecedented for him. Sadly, she could guess why this was the first time for that, seeing as he had very conveniently picked the day that their dad was gone on a business trip.

She quietly sits in the corner and eats her tteokbokki, careful not to spill any of the sauce on her notebook as she writes in it. She nearly chokes when Namjoon makes his way towards her, because she can’t quite wrap her head around it. It makes her a little tingly when he chooses to spend time around her even though he really doesn’t have to.

Now that she thinks about it, they’ve been doing that a lot lately. Hanging out alone, she means. Texting each other one-on-one rather than in the group chat, heading out to Hongdae separate from Kyunghee and Donghyuk, going out to PC bangs and Starbucks without everyone else. In the beginning, it was just so they could tutor each other, as they’d made the deal that while she helped him with his English, he’d help her with the horror that was linear equations.

Yuri can’t fathom how he can find English so hard but algebra so easy. It’s very Namjoon-like, she thinks. He’s incredible at very niche things, but he can’t do things that most people can do. She’d never want to humiliate him by asking, but Kyunghee heard from Donghyuk that Namjoon can’t tie his shoelaces correctly. And honestly? She believes it. He strikes her as a scatterbrained genius.

She thinks about Namjoon a lot lately, for whatever reason. But not in a bad way. If anything, she regards even his worst quirks fondly, like how he duct tapes his bag because he keeps accidentally breaking the strap off or those times (yes, there were multiple) he made them run back to the PC bang while they were walking back to the subway station because he suddenly remembered that he left his phone there. Despite all this, for whatever reason, she’s been feeling exceptionally shy around him lately. 

Is this what it’s like having a friend? She doesn’t know if it’s just the fluttery excitement of a new friendship, but it makes her face go hot. It only gets worse when he leans over her where she’s sitting at the table, his chest lightly pressed against the back of her seat.

“What are you writing in there?” he asks.

“Just stuff I’ve noticed,” she says casually. “Nothing interesting.”

“I see my name there, though,” he says, and she immediately clamps her hand over the page. Her response makes him chuckle.

“I thought you couldn’t read English,” she says, cheeks flushed.

“I’ve improved. Thanks for that, by the way,” he teases. That bastard. “What is that? What did you write about me?”

“It’s the same thing I was working on in Hongdae,” she admits. “The music analysis notebook.”

“And you wrote about me?” he asks.

“Yes?” she says, like it’s obvious. “You’re pretty prominent, dude.” 

“Interesting,” he says, looking at her expectantly.

“What?”

“Are you gonna tell me what it says?” he asks. “You wrote about me, so it’s only fair, right?”

“I guess,” she says, flushing.

“What’s this say?” he asks, pointing to a sentence that follows his name.

“Oh, that just… that just describes how like, you do this thing, sometimes,” she laughs nervously. “You do this thing when you rap, where you like… puncture the ends of syllables very aggressively. It’s just funny because that’s how English sounds, but like, you’re doing it in Korean, and… I don’t know. It stands out. I just like when you do it.”

“Oh.” He makes a face.

“Hey, I don’t mean—it’s unique. Because it sounds English, but it’s not?” she explains, but it feels like she’s digging herself into a deeper and deeper hole. So she continues, “Uh, I don’t know how to explain it. It probably just stands out to me because I speak English? But it’s still good. It’s really cool, actually. It’ll be good for when you audition for a label or whatever you wanna do.”

“Oh, I don’t know if I…” he trails off, shaking his head. “I don’t know if I’m ever going to audition or do anything like that. To be honest, I was just planning on doing something behind the scenes, you know?”

“What? Why?” she asks. 

“I don’t know,” he sighs. “I don’t think my parents really like the idea of me becoming a rapper as like, a career. I always figured I’d go to college for sound engineering and become a producer or something like that. Technically, they can still call me an engineer. They can’t get mad then, right?” It’s delivered jokingly, but Yuri can feel the underlying truth in it, sad and wistful.

It’s moments like this that make Yuri realize how easy she has it. No matter how rocky her family life has gotten, her parents had always supported her and Kyunghee’s pursuits.

“That’s shitty,” she huffs, lying her cheek against the smooth wood of the table. “What a waste. You’re one of the better rappers I’ve heard, to be honest. Not becoming a rapper would be, like, a disservice to all of South Korea.”

“Don’t say that,” he says sheepishly, but he can’t stop smiling.

“I’m telling the truth,” she says, and she is. “I mean, most of the dudes who want to drop out and become SoundCloud rappers are doomed, but you have actual talent. You could pull it off, though. You could be the chosen one.”  Namjoon laughs, ducking his head to hide his flushed cheeks.

“You’re too much,” he chuckles, shaking his head.

When he leaves to go to the bathroom, she flips her journal to the back where her epiphany list is.

Epiphany #08: Sometimes hardworking, talented people don’t get what they deserve.

What a bummer.

August 15, 2008. Hongdae Station, Seoul, South Korea.

There’s no single observation that makes it all fall into place—it hits her suddenly, like whiplash, as she’s walking home from the subway station with her brother, like all the little moments she thought nothing of before had suddenly come together to form this big amalgamation of questionable. 

Hands lingering on top of each other for an extra long second during keyboard lessons. Glances for just a bit too long when he isn't looking. The constant stream of yeses, even when it’s for something she can’t possibly fathom anyone wanting to agree to.

Of course, Donghyuk. Sure, Donghyuk. Okay, Donghyuk. Donghyuk. Always. Anything.

“Oppa, do you like Donghyuk?”

Kyunghee stumbles, tripping over the question like it’s a brick placed before his feet.

“Huh? What? Huh?” he sputters, too hurried to be casual. “Of course I do? Of course I do. Like him I mean. He’s my friend. I like him.”

“Oh… you know what I mean,” she says, refusing to push the obvious out into the open. Usually, she’d just say what’s on her mind like she always did, but being wrong about this kind of thing would be mortifying for them both. When he flushes and quiets, she knows that she’s not wrong.

“Don’t tell him,” he chokes out, voice cracking he’s going to cry. He puts a hand over his face so she can’t see, so maybe he really is. “Please don’t tell him.”

“Hey, hey, hey!” she rushes over to hug him, letting him lean down half a foot so he can drop his head to cry into her shoulder.

“I can’t just—we’re mixed kids living in Korea, Yuri, things suck for us as it is! I’m not interested in making life harder for myself!” he tells her. Everything comes out rushed, like he’s presenting a PowerPoint and he has like ten slides left to get through but only two minutes left.

“Hey, hey, hey—” she tries, but he doesn’t let her speak.

“And nothing’s gonna come out of it, anyway,” he continues. “He’s the most heterosexual man alive, his—his fucking rap name is Supreme Boi, for fuck’s sake. Like the fucking hype beast brand. And—and have you heard him speak? He sounds like the guys that called me a fag in middle school.”

“You don’t think he’s like that, do you?” she says, eyes sad and droopy as she rubs comforting circles into his back. His scoffs.

“We high-fived and he said ‘no homo’ right afterwards,” he says, like it’s an answer. 

Well. It basically is.

“Why would you like a person like that?” she asks, appalled. Her brother is a good person who deserves nice things, so she cannot fathom why he would subject himself to this kind of torture. 

“I don't know. I don’t even know how or when or why it happened. I just…” he trails off. Then sighs. “I guess you don’t know ‘til you know.” 

To be honest, Yuri has no idea what the fuck he’s trying to say.

“Sounds dumb,” is all she can offer.

“It is dumb,” her brother agrees. “And confusing and controlling for no reason. You just fall into it, I guess. And you barely ever get anything in return for it.”

Yuri’s nose wrinkles at the senselessness of it all, but she supposes it’s something she’d have to learn eventually. When they get home that night, she takes note of it in her journal.

Epiphany #09: Love is dumb. Cost outweighs benefit. Do not attempt.

September 15, 2008. Kim Household, Seoul, South Korea.

Yuri and Namjoon tutor each other on Saturdays.

However, today is Chuseok, so the club and the Starbucks and the PC bang and all their usual hangout spots are all closed. Meanwhile, Yuri’s dad is home and he invited all his siblings over for the holiday, including Aunt Skin Lightening Cream from Busan. None of them are even from Seoul, so she’s not even sure why they’re visiting when you’re supposed to visit your hometown on Chuseok. 

Fuck Busan, her dad says.

Understandably, she doesn’t want any of her friends coming over to the house, especially when she knows her dad is going to use it as an excuse to get even drunker than usual. Namjoon’s place it is, then.

Yuri’s never been to his house. She’s never really gone over to a friend’s house before period, so when she tells her mom about it, she’s… overenthusiastic, to say the least. Yuri spends a good half-hour reminding her mom that, no, she does not have a boyfriend and she is not going over to his house for Chuseok. They are just friends. Regardless, her mom does her up pretty for the occasion, fitting her into a baby blue hanbok and doing her hair and makeup all pretty.

A suited businessman on the subway even tells her that she looks pretty. She thanks him, and begins to wonder if she should maybe wear makeup more often. For once, she does feel pretty, just a little bit out of her element. But not out of place, with so many of the passengers in similar for attire for Chuseok. The feeling only intensifies when she steps off the subway and catches sight of Namjoon, who they agreed would wait there for her so he could walk her to his house, since she got lost easily. He’s in hanbok, too, but that doesn’t stop his eyes from widening when he sees her.

“What?” she says.

“Nothing,” he replies. “You look pretty.”

“Oh. Um, thank you.” She takes his arm as they walk back to his place. It feels natural at this point.

“Is everyone fine with me coming over on Chuseok?” she asks nervously. “Don’t you have anything planned? Am I intruding? Oh God, Namjoon, what if your mom doesn’t like me?” 

“You’re overthinking this. I don’t see why they’d be mad when we’re just studying together,” he laughs. “Seriously, it’s not like we’re dating or anything.” For some reason, the statement makes her heart beat a little faster.

“R-Right.”

When they get to his house, his parents welcome Yuri with open arms. They tease Namjoon profusely about her, to which they both have to repeatedly remind them that they are study buddies and are most definitely not dating. Yuri feels like she wouldn’t mind dating Namjoon, though.

No clue where that thought came from. She files that one away to deal with later, but it doesn’t stop her quickened heartbeat from kicking it into fucking overdrive. It only worsens when he invites her upstairs to his room, and she can practically feel her legs wobbling as she goes up the steps.

It’s so very Namjoon in a way she can’t describe. Little Kaws figures line his desk, textbooks lay scattered on the floor, and a blue-hooded Ryan plushie lies tucked in his bed like it’s a living person. It’s an instant reminder of how soft he is, no matter how hard he tries to hide it. She grabs the stuffed toy coos at it lovingly.

“That’s uh—that’s my sister’s,” he says. She ignores the obvious lie.

“Baby,” she says lovingly to the toy, squeezing its tummy. “Hey Namjoon, can I lay in your bed?”

“Uh.” Namjoon coughs awkwardly, turning away with flushed cheeks. “Do whatever you want.”

She flops down onto it rather unceremoniously, turning over onto her stomach with little care as to whether or not she smudges her makeup or wrinkles her hanbok.

“Smells like you,” she says without thinking.

“What?” he laughs, swiveling around in his desk chair to grin at her, a teasing smile on his face. With her having just said that, his embarrassment over a plushie pales in comparison. Now she’s the one scrambling for an excuse. She sucks at those, so she just powers on and tells the truth.

“The other guys use like, obnoxious amounts of cologne and Axe body spray,” she explains. Embarrassedly burrowing her face into the sheets, she says, “You just smell like boy.” He chuckles.

“I am just a boy.”

She lifts her face from the sheets to look up at him, hands folded nervously in his lap. In the big desk chair, he looks impossibly small compared to the tree of a man she knows him to be. Hip hop albums and posters line the shelves and the wall behind his desk, and it makes him look an awful lot like a dreamer.

Maybe Kim Namjoon and Lim Yuri are the same, she thinks. Two kids with dreams bigger than they will ever be.

October 25, 2008. Hongdae Station, Seoul, South Korea.

She’s quiet today, Namjoon thinks.

It’s not like she’s being icy or anything. If anything, she’s being really objective and professional about everything—no teasing, no joking. It’s so bad she says she doesn’t want to meet at the PC bang because it’s too loud, and she doesn’t want to meet at her house because it’s loud there, too. He doesn’t get what she’s implying with the latter statement, but thinks it better not to pry.

Decidedly, they’re meeting at the same Starbucks they reunited in that week after she helped him find his glasses in that club in Hongdae. Somehow, it makes the distance between them feel impossibly wider. Maybe if things were this way when they first met, he wouldn’t mind, but it’s all so extremely un-Yuri-like that it makes his skin crawl.

Now that he thinks about it, she didn’t respond to his texts last night, either. Usually, she’d leap the opportunity to talk about her school life or the obnoxious musical theater kids, and he’d give her advice on how to deal with it like a good oppa. He doesn’t really mind, though. It makes him feel like he’s taking care of her. Makes him feel needed.

Which is probably why seeing her like this sucks so much. She’s obviously upset, but she won’t even talk to him about it, and she tells him everything that doesn’t involve the forbidden topic of her home life. Even that she’s let up on lately, letting little inklings of it spill out here and there. Her dad drinks a lot. Her mother’s a bit protective. Her little brother is her baby, despite the demonic energy he exudes. Basic things.

He feels like he should ask about it, but also struggles with the possibility that he might be prying into something she’s not comfortable talking about. He spends so much time wrestling with these thoughts that he ends up saying nothing the whole time, all the way up until closing and the barista kicks them out. Yuri’s working especially hard today, he notices, like she’s trying to distract herself from something. Uneasily, he continues to wonder what it is.

His discomfort only grows as he walks her down to the subway station and she still has nothing to say. On the days she veered into the weirdest, most off-topic territory, he reached over the table to flick her forehead and tell her to focus on the music. But even then, she’d find a way to squeeze a couple of personal anecdotes into the conversation, and then elaborate on the walk to the subway since they really didn’t need to talk about music stuff anymore.

Sometimes, it’d be the other way around, and he’d vent about his life problems on the walk back while she listened. But today, whatever problems he can scrounge around for in his mind feel miniscule compared to whatever she’s going through, if her sudden change of character is any indication. She even refused his regular offer of an extra canned coffee for the road.

She doesn’t look particularly upset, though? Just neutral. It’s definitely an unwelcome change of pace from her usual free-spirited smiliness, but she doesn’t seem to be doing too badly, so he just keeps his mouth shut. 

At least until halfway through their walk, when she trips over nothing and tumbles to the ground.

It’s not a particularly terrible fall, and she pushes herself back up onto her hands and knees without trouble. But then she just. Stays like that. Doesn’t get up off the ground. Gently, he taps her shoulder.

“Hey, c’mon. It’s dirty down there,” he chides softly, like he’s talking to a little kid. She doesn’t budge, so he places a comforting hand on the small of her back. “Are you—are you okay?”

It’s crazy how quickly those three words alone can break the proverbial dam, because suddenly she’s crying. No wailing or sobbing, just quiet tears with the occasional hiccup, which really is all the more heartbreaking.

“No,” she whimpers through her tears. “I’m not. I’m not okay.”

“Hey, hey,” he says softly, pulling her up off the ground and holding her tight against his chest. She’s pliant like a ragdoll, like she’ll fall over if he lets go, so he squeezes her tighter. Her arms make their way around his waist, resting just above his hips. 

The weight of the world comes tumbling out her lips, and he just holds her and listens. 

Everything makes her older brother mad these days. Her little brother, Daniel, the scary one, cries a lot. Her mom cries a lot. Her dad drinks a lot. Drinks too much. Her parents are divorcing and her mom is moving back to the Philippines without them.

It’s just so much, she tells him. It’s so much, Namjoon. She apologizes over and over, because I didn’t mean to break down, not like this, not in front of you. Not in front of anyone. 

He frowns as he comes to the realization that she never talks about her problems or her feelings or insecurities, but he spills his to her and she coaxes his out of him all the time. He understands not wanting to share this with everyone, since it’s technically Kyunghee’s personal business, too. He’s glad that she’s able to confide in him like this. It just sucks that it took a breakdown for her to do so.

“I’m sorry,” she says, over and over and over. “I didn’t mean to dump all this on you. You have enough to deal with, you know?”

“Hey, don’t worry about me,” he says, burying his nose into her hair. “Just because my life sucks doesn’t mean yours can’t, either. Just don’t think about me and my shit, okay? There’s nothing wrong with talking about yourself for once.”

“That’s not—I can’t just—I can’t just ignore you. It’s impossible to ignore you,” she sniffles into his chest. Squeezes him tighter. “You’re my friend, you know? I care about you.” 

Namjoon breathes out a shaky sigh at that, goosebumps rising on his skin. His heart swells at her words, despite the circumstances, and all he can do is wish there was more he could do for her. There’s nothing to do but squeeze her tighter.

It’s a while until she pulls away to wipe her tears. He reaches down and smooths out her hair.

“I’m sorry for crying.”

“Don’t be.”

“Thanks, then.”

“Mm-hm.”

The rest of the walk to the station is peaceful and familiar. She picks the conversation back up, opting to ignore her breakdown and talking about literally anything else, instead. She talks about how her little brother has his first crush and how her older brother wants to be drum major next year and how the weird musical theater kids are, unsurprisingly, still off the shits. All the while, she grasps his hand in hers, fingers interlocked. She gives his hand the occasional squeeze, and he squeezes back without fail.

They part once they’re across the street from the station, subway and he finds himself incredibly endeared by the way she doesn’t want to seem to let go. 

“Goodnight, Yuri,” he says, reluctantly pulling his hand from hers.

“Goodnight, Namjoon-oppa,” she sighs, letting her fingertips linger over his for a minute He watches as she turns to leave, but suddenly something hits him.

“Hey, one more thing,” he calls out to her, and tries not to laugh at how fast her head whips around at the sound of his voice.

“Yeah?” she calls back.

“It’s, uh,” he says, “It’s impossible to ignore you, too.” 

It’s just a simple repeat of her own words, but he hopes she knows that he means them, because he wants them to make her feel the way he did when she said them—needed. Important. A little bit fluttery.

Her face crumples then, so sudden that he almost regrets saying it. But then she’s practically hurtling towards him, smacking against his chest with a force that quite literally knocks the wind out of him. She’s crying again, and this time it is the loud sobbing kind. He shushes her softly. Presses a kiss onto the top of her head. He rarely initiates affection, but in the moment it just feels right. 

They hold each other like that for who knows how long. He takes hold of her hand as she calms down, the two staring down at their interlocked fingers all the while.

She misses the subway in her reverie.

“Just say goodnight and go next time,” she jokes, laughing tearily into his chest. “Stupid Namjoon, making me late. Making me cry.” There’s no threat to it, though, because she squeezes him tighter, nuzzles her face deeper into his scent, practically burrowing into him.

“I’m sorry,” he laughs softly.

They spend another thirty minutes waiting for the next subway to come in, two kids holding each other under the Seoul streetlights.

April 11, 2009. Kim Household, Ilsan, South Korea.

Yuri sprints to Namjoon’s house from the subway station at a speed unimaginable.

When Namjoon opens up the door, she’s panting and sweaty. He opens his mouth to question her about it, but before he can say a word, she’s shoving a piece of paper in his hands.

“The final match,” she recites the flyer word for word. Despite how out of breath she is, she still manages to smile brightly and sound excited. “Big Deal Show. August 23. Be there or be square.”

“The final match,” he repeats. His eyes bore holes into the paper even as he walks inside, Yuri following closely behind him. 

“You should do it, Namjoon,” she says. “Everyone’s waiting on you. You’re it, Namjoon.”

“Don’t say that,” he says, shaking his head.

“I’m serious,” she huffs. “They gave it to Kyunghee to give to me to give to you. Donghyuk didn’t get one. They want you.”

Namjoon looks up from the flyer to see her face, bright and wide-eyed and hopeful. He wonders where all those stars in her eyes came from. They can’t possibly be for him.

“Okay,” he says, grinning like a fool.

“Okay,” she says back.

“But there’s one more thing I should deal with before I go into this competition,” he admits. “I’ve been thinking of changing my stage name.” He’s been thinking about it for a while, really, even reserving the username on a throwaway account so nobody takes it, but he still brings it up to gauge her reaction just in case it really isn’t a good idea. Yuri’s always had a good feel for things.

“Aw, I like Runch Randa,” she says with a pout, but continues, “I guess I’m open to change. What are you planning on changing it to?”

“I was just thinking about shortening it to Randa. No big deal,” he says, throwing in that pun for good measure. He’s trying to be nonchalant about it, throwing a shrug in there and all that. But then she does That Thing where she folds her arms over her chest and looks up at him with those big ol’ doe eyes.

“Is this because Fetion called you ‘lunch boy’ in that diss track?”

“What? No. What? No,” he says twice. And forcefully. It’s laughable, really, and he commends Yuri for not letting even a chuckle out because he knows he’d lose it.

“Oh, Namjoon,” she sighs sweetly, and the way she says his name makes it sound like it could belong to anybody but him. It makes his heart fall into his ass. “Don’t look too much into what other people say about you. Rappers like to diss just because, you know? That’s just hip-hop culture.”

“It’s not because of that,” he says, and she frowns like she thinks he’s lying, which is only half-true. “Really. I just wanna go for a more mature sound, you know? Randa just sounds more respectable than Runch Randa, that’s all.”

“Nothing to do with Fetion?”

“Nope.” He even pops the ‘P’ for emphasis. Maybe he’s trying a little hard.

“I don’t know if I believe you, but I won’t press it,” she says. As expected, she sees right through him, but he counts the outcome as a win.

“Good,” he says. “I just wanted your opinion on it.” She gasps dramatically.

“Wanted the opinion of little ol’ me?”

“Of course,” he says, “You’re important to me.” He says it like it’s nothing, even though that couldn’t be further from the truth.

Epiphany #10: Knowing you’re important to someone feels really, really nice.

August 23, 2009. Rolling Hall, Seoul, South Korea.

It’s a really big day for Kim Namjoon.

At the very least, it’s a big enough day that he’s arrived to the venue two hours early, just to be safe. He leans against the wall as he scrolls and scrolls and scrolls again over the lyrics he has written in the notes of his phone.

There’s a sense of finality to it. Logically, he tries to convince himself that isn’t true, but it’s already taken him this long to convince his mom that his interest in rap was more than a waste of time. He just needs this one shot, this one thing, to make her believe in him. That’s all he wants. All he needs. In the meantime, Yuri’s there to support and believe in him. His own cute little personal cheerleader.

Yuri just oozes cuteness, he thinks. If you asked the honest Namjoon, he’d tell you that he just wants to pick her up and put her in his pocket to take home. But the Namjoon in the real world is not only a teenage boy, but an aspiring rapper with a reputation to maintain. Masculinity is a prison. That doesn’t stop him from letting her hold his hand as she helps him practice his lyrics, all the way up until he goes on stage to perform. She even kisses his knuckles for good luck, like they’re in a fairytale. It twists his heart in a way that only pushes him to succeed. He has to do well. He has to win--to prove it to his family, to have something to celebrate with his friends, to make sure that all of Yuri’s producing and support hasn’t gone to waste with him.

But he fucks up his only chance.

He forgets a bunch of the lyrics he’d planned out and ends up having to pull some lyrical miracle spiritual individual shit out of his ass. After it’s all over, his heart sinks at the way that Yuri lights up when she sees him, even after all the performers and judges and audience members have dispersed. She looks at him like he didn’t just completely fuck up, like he didn’t just lose and give one of the most embarrassing performances in his life. Before he knows it, he’s crying.

His hands fly over his eyes in the hopes that she doesn’t see. He feels fucking pathetic.

“Hey, hey, hey!” she says, her soft voice panicked. Cautiously, her hands take hold of his wrists and, for fear of hurting her with his resistance, he goes limp and lets himself be handled. When she places her cool, tiny hands over his eyes, he can’t help but to breathe a sigh of relief. Though he can’t see her, he can feel her dropping her head into the crook of his neck, breath tickling his ear with gentle shushes.

“It’s okay, it’s okay,” she says softly. “I’m here. It’s okay. You’re okay.”

“I messed up,” he said.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about, Namjoon,” she sighs. “You did great.”

“I messed up,” he repeats. “I was the worst one there.”

“Don’t say that,” she chides, moving her hands from over his eyes to thread through his hair. “Are you deaf? Just because you didn’t win out of all these people doesn’t mean you did badly at all. There was only one ranking, you know? One of the judges asked for your contact info, right?”

“Just one. Sleepy.”

“I love Sleepy. That has to count for something, right?”

“He probably just felt bad.”

“Oh, Namjoon.” 

She squeezes him as tight as she can. What else can she do? Meanwhile, he reaches out, feeling around since he can’t exactly see, until his hand finds purchase on the back of her neck. Oh God, she’s so small. 

He can faintly feel the ridges of her spine as hand slides lower to find its place on the small of her back. He could easily squish her if he tried, so he feels a tingly sort of pleasure at the trust she’s given him as she settles deeper into his embrace. God, he feels so bad. He hates that she’s almost always the one comforting him and picking up the pieces when all he wants to do is protect her from everything ever. If he weren’t so worried about hurting her, he’d squeeze her tight and probably never let go.

Yuri squeezes back just as tightly. She doesn’t understand why he thinks he messed up so bad. In her eyes, he did everything perfectly. Sleepy wouldn’t have asked for his contact information if he wasn’t any good, right? How could he have been anything but? Didn’t he hear himself?

She wishes he could just see himself the way she sees him.

To make matters worse, he seems to have lost his student ID somewhere at some point throughout the day. Yuri spends a good half hour helping him look for it in the dim lights of the club, and it fills her with a little sense of nostalgia for the night they first met. Unfortunately, they find nothing this time around. Seeing as he needs it to get on the subway, he calls his mom to pick him up instead. It’s just the cherry on top for how pathetic he’s feeling today.

Namjoon dries his tears and regains his composure so that his mom doesn’t ask about it when she shows up. When she arrives, she thanks Yuri for looking after her son and offers her a ride home, not taking no for an answer even as Yuri assures her that it’s okay and she doesn’t want to intrude. With the emotional draining he’s had today, she’d rather Namjoon get home as fast as possible, but she’s terrible at coming up with lies and excuses.

“Her dad is on his way to pick her up,” he lies for her, knowing damn well she’s taking the subway. His mother accepts this, thanking her again before waving her off. Once she’s out of eyeshot, she mouths a thank you to Namjoon. He forces a half-smile in reply.

Yuri plops down on one of the seats to sulk. Something stops her from leaving for the subway right away, and in retrospect, she likes to believe it was fate. It was probably just laziness.

In the midst of her musing and sulking, she notices a very familiar figure—from the judge’s table no less—emerge from the bathroom. Sleepy from Untouchable, she recognizes him as. She knows because her and her brothers have Quiet Storm on loop in their house, so he’s got to have some sway in the contestants they pass on. She’d worry about making a good first impression, but she was a friend before she was a fan. If it meant risking looking like a crazy person, then so be it.

“You!” she yells from across the room.

“Ah! Me!” he yells back in surprise.

“I need to talk to you!” she yells. He gulps as the tiny girl approaches him like he’s prey, not daring to take her eyes off of him. 

Please don’t be a sasaeng, he prays.

He steels himself as she draws closer, relaxing as he takes in her measly, barely-five-foot stature. Yeah, he could handle himself if things went bad. He could punt a child. He sighs gratefully when he realizes he will have to do no such thing.

“H-Hey,” she says nervously, voice immediately going small when she’s in front of him. “You were a judge, right? For the contest?”

“Yes,” he replies, trying his damnedest not to sound intimidated by this little girl.

“I need your contact info.”

“Excuse me?”

“I—look,” she says, sounding more and more desperate by the minute. “I’m not asking for your number or anything, like—just give me your work email or something!”

“Uh—”

“My friend performed today,” she scrambles to explain. “In case some stuff happens to his work, I want you to have it. Or get your hands on it? So you have material to hear if you call back. Um, here, just take this.” She scribbles her email into her journal and rips the paper out before handing it to him. He squints his eyes at it.

“Beats by Glass,” he reads her email address.

“Yes.”

“I know you,” he says, “a lot of the trainees at TS use your beats for their audition tapes.”

“It’s ‘cause they’re free,” she explains. He looks surprised at that.

“Admirable.”

“Thank you,” she says, “I produced his stuff, too, um—yeah. Just let me send you my friend’s work.”

“Don’t you have your own music to focus on? Wouldn’t you rather promote yourself?” he asks. She shakes her head.

“He deserves this more than anyone.” Sleepy’s eyes soften at that.

“I’ll see what I can do.”

October 17, 2009. Lim Household, Seoul, South Korea.

As a surprise to even herself, Sleepy emails Yuri back. She sends him Namjoon’s music that she has saved. He emails back a thumbs up emoji. Ugh.

Unfortunately, just as Yuri had anticipated, Namjoon found himself in a bad headspace and immediately deleted all of his content off the internet in an especially powerful bout of self-loathing.

He could get a callback, she keeps reminding him, but he just won’t believe it—so he gives up before he even tries. He psychs himself out of things before he even gets a chance. His mom says that’s why he hasn’t started driving yet.

Despite this, Namjoon and Yuri still find themselves working together, even as Namjoon assures her that he is not interested in swallowing his pride and crawling back to the entertainment industry. For now, he’s just a songwriter that she’s teaching the basics of her beatmaking programs. She relents to letting him believe that, but she also takes the fact that he’s having anything to do with music at all as a glimmer of hope that he’ll return to his promising rap career.

At this very moment, Namjoon is not writing lyrics, and a good dozen pages of his notebook now half-filled with content he’s apparently dissatisfied with. For now, Yuri’s relented to letting him absentmindedly scribble on her left arm with a pen while she works her producer magic on GarageBand. She’s allowed it on the simple condition that he doesn’t draw any dicks or write any curse words on his arm because her mom might see.

“No promises.”

“Try it, bitch.”

Fortunately, he does not scribble any dicks nor fucks. It’s all just mindless doodles, like stars and swirls and hearts and that one pointy S everyone drew in elementary school. The only one she actually pays any mind to is a little crescent moon on her inner wrist.

“Aw, that suits you,” she says.

“How so?” he asks.

Yuri doesn’t know how to tell Namjoon that he reminds her of the moon, bright and calm and watchful and constant and underappreciated, without embarrassing herself. So she doesn’t.

“You’re… I don’t know,” she says. “It just does.”

“What were you gonna say?” he presses, raising a brow. As expected, he can see right through her.

“Nothing. There was no end to that sentence,” she says.

“Okay.” From his tone, it’s obvious that he doesn’t believe her, but he doesn’t press the issue any further. He was a lot better than the others at making sure not to stray into uncomfortable territory.

They usually sit together in comfortable silence, which she’s noticed has since become a staple of their relationship. She doesn’t mind, though. There are no expectations between them. It’s a nice change of pace from the constant expectations present in both their day-to-day lives. His silence today, though, seems a little tense. She doesn’t know how she can tell, but she can feel it. Maybe their hearts are connected, she thinks.

“Are you okay?” she asks, hoping she’s not wrong.

“I don’t know,” he admits with a sigh. “I don’t really like anything I’ve written at all. I feel like I’ve reached my limit, you know? Maybe I’m just out of good ideas. Maybe I never had any in the first place. Maybe I was never meant for this at all.”

She shoves at his arm, pouting up at him once she’s fully distracted him from his absentminded scribbling. There’s a wobbly line running down the side of her arm now, but she can’t bring herself to care very much.

“What?” he asks, annoyed.

“C’mon, Namjoon,” she huffs, ignoring the way he scoffs and rolls his eyes at her. “You’re really gonna let one bump in the road throw you off momentum for good?”

“That ‘one bump in the road’ was my last shot, Yuri,” he says hopelessly. “It’s over for me.”

“But you’re still trying,” she says. “I like to believe that means something. C’mon, let’s see what you’ve got.” She reaches over him to grab his notebook, flipping it open to a random set of lyrics. They’re close enough now to where Namjoon barely bats an eye at this—he is, both literally and figuratively, an open book to her.

Smoothing it out, she reads, my heart is like a detective who is the criminal’s son. Even as I know who the criminal is, I can’t catch him. She blinks a couple of times in surprise. Reads it again.

“You wrote this?”

“Yeah,” he admits sheepishly, scratching the back of his head. “Look, that one is really old. It’s from before we even met, I think. I know it’s kinda corny—”

“It’s good,” she cuts him off.

“Yeah?” he says, surprised. She just nods in response, even though there’s so much more that she wants to say.

She wants to tell him that everything he says leaves her in awe. That he’s the smartest boy she’s ever met. When she writes her lyrics, it’s always about something she’s seen or done or felt—but the lyrics he comes up with are written like stories, like there’s an entire universe in his mind. His mind is filled to the brim with different worlds and swirling galaxies, and hers does nothing but walk along a path already laid down by the cosmos.

But she doesn’t.

“It’s good,” she repeats instead.

She doesn’t know why it’s so hard to say what she feels. Maybe it’s because she doesn’t even know how to word how she feels.

Especially with Namjoon, as of late.

Epiphany #12: Talking about feelings with Namjoon is hard now. Like getting over a great big hill.

March 07, 2010. Starbucks, Ilsan, South Korea.

Against all odds, Namjoon gets a callback. 

It comes directly from a man known as Hitman Bang, the CEO of Big Hit Entertainment—according to Namjoon, he’s a very successful songwriter (that’s where the Hitman part is from… how cheesy) who’s worked with big wigs like JYP before. Yuri hasn’t heard of the guy or his company. Probably some poor, weird indie label, from the looks of it. She’s not exactly sure how credible they are, but when the man sings Namjoon’s praises and offers him a contract, she pushes her doubts aside.

As soon as the phone call ends, Namjoon envelopes Yuri in a hug, warm and all-encompassing and very, very Namjoon-like. He feels like he’s on top of the world, like all the dreams he felt he’d thrown away as only dreams were tumbling back into the realm of possibility. It’s like all his wishes are coming true—in everything, there’s only one problem.

Namjoon has yet to tell his mom that he’s been rapping.

Of course she knows that he does it, but it’s just a little hobby in her eyes. She still believes the lie—well, half-truth, he prefers to say—that he’s going to PC bangs all the time, and not rap clubs in Hongdae. She’s found a couple of his lyrics tucked into the pages of his textbooks, but he bullshits excuses about how they’re extra credit poetry for his literature class. He’s been lying about it for years now, but now that he’s going to get signed for rapping, now’s as good a time as any.

He’s nervous. It’s one thing to confess that you’ve been lying for three years, but it’s another to beg your mom to sign a contract that’ll help you pursue your rap dream immediately afterwards.

Yuri was just there for emotional support. They’re walking to his house back from Starbucks because really, he could only gather the courage to do this when hyped up on overpriced espresso. They walk back with Yuri’s hand linked in his, and despite him never being the best with physical affection, it feels natural, supportive. Loving, even.

“You got this,” she says, squeezing his hand in hers.

“I got this,” he repeats, even if he sounds like he doesn’t quite believe what he’s saying.

“Just be honest about how you feel and everything’s gonna be fine,” she assures him. He doesn’t quite believe her (feeling things out was never his forte) but he supposes he’ll just have to take her advice on this one. He wishes she could just be there next to him, but having her randomly sat into their family discussion would just be weird. Instead, the plan is for her to sit in that same Starbucks they were just at until she gets the text that he is 100% okay.

“If it goes really bad, I am four blocks away!” she reminds him, putting up four fingers for emphasis. “Hopefully your dad won’t threaten to kill you, but you know. Just in case.” Namjoon grimaces, but nods. He wonders what her home life must be like for her to make comments like that.

“Okay,” he says.

Yuri’s heart falls into her ass as she squeezes Namjoon’s hands one last time before letting him go back into his house. Once the door shuts behind him, she practically sprints back to Starbucks, not wanting to stay close and accidentally hear yelling or some other part of the argument. She heard enough of that kinda stuff at home.

She can barely sit still at Starbucks, fidgeting anxiously as she thinks about what her friend must be going through right now. She brought her laptop and her notebook in her messenger bag so she could at least take advantage of the free Wi-Fi to work on stuff, but her mind always strays back to him. She periodically checks on her phone for any new notifications (her group chat with the boys has been long since muted) and heaves her shoulders in disappointment every time there is none. It’s been nearly four hours and he has yet to text her anything. 

Suddenly, the blip of a text notification on her phone catches her attention.

[18:27] Namjoon: look outside

Yuri whips around to see Namjoon grinning behind the glass walls of the building. Carelessly shoving all her stuff back in her bag, she practically flies through the door to greet him.

She practically crashes against his chest, but it’s okay because he picks her up and spins her around like he’s just returned from war. He’s so bright and giggly and infectious that Yuri finds herself laughing, too. She almost feels like it’s a little romantic, but quickly kicks that thought away, as always.

“They said yes,” he says once he sets her down, like he’s still surprised, even now. “My parents said yes. They’re gonna sign the contract with me. I’m gonna be a rapper, Yuri.”

“Oh my God.” She’s in disbelief too, because that’d be tough news for any parent to handle. But Namjoon is the most articulate person she knows. If anyone could break that kind of news, it would be him. “How’d you win ‘em over? What’d you say?” Namjoon laughs nervously.

“It’s kind of—it’s so lame,” he says, embarrassed, but Yuri nods for him to go on. “My grades are 5,000th place in the country, right?”

“Nerd.”

“Shut up. Anyways,” he continues, “The part I think I really got them with was—basically, I asked my mom whether she wanted to have a son who was a first-place rapper or a 5,000th-place student.”

Yuri bursts into laughter.

“Cheesy!” she yells. “Namjoon, that’s so—that’s so cringey.”

“It worked, didn’t it?!” he defends himself.

“It was gonna work no matter what,” she laughs. He shakes his head.

“I think I just got lucky,” he says. She doesn’t believe it.

Kim Namjoon could take over the world, if he wanted to.

March 06, 2010. Ilsan Lake Park, Ilsan, South Korea.

It’s a Saturday night, and Namjoon and Yuri hold hands as they walk through Ilsan Lake Park.

They do this a lot, now, and it makes her feel a little tingly. It’s just walking and talking, she knows, but it’s different. Whenever they’d go over to each other’s houses to study or work on music together, she’d psych herself out of any sense of excitement with the reminder that, as close as they may seem, they were still both getting things out of it. But this isn’t like that.

Neither of them are obligated to spend any time with each other outside of helping one another, but they do anyway. Namjoon ends up talking most of the time, but it’s okay. She’s no good with words anyway, and she likes his voice and the things that he has to say. Sometimes the skip rocks, even though neither of them are any good at it, before giggling at their failures.

Are these dates? she sometimes wonders. They feel an awful lot like dates. She doesn’t know how that makes her feel, but she feels it in the pit of her stomach. Yuri has always been upfront about the things she wants, but with Namjoon, she isn’t quite sure what she wants. She thinks she just wants to be around him.

“I’ve been discussing contract stuff with Hitman Bang,” he says casually, “and he’s thinking about changing it from an underground rap-based group to an idol boy group.”

Yuri freezes in her tracks beneath the streetlights.

“What?” she asks, making a face. “Seriously? You can’t be serious. You’re joking, right?”

“Why the hell did you say it like that?” he bristles. “Jesus. You’d think I told you I was planning on dropping out of school and becoming a stripper.”

“I’m just trying to warn you. Idol life is hard,” she says. “Netizens will have a field day with you.”

“Excuse me?”

“I—fuck, I didn’t mean it like that, okay?” she huffs. “It’s just that—you saw how people treated Nacseo when he signed to an entertainment label. I like idol music, too, but not everyone around us is open to that kinda change, you know? They’re gonna eat you alive, Namjoon,”

“I don’t care about their opinions,” he says, and she scoffs.

“You’ve never not cared about what people think of you,” she shoots back, her mind jumping to every time he’s thrown away a good set of song lyrics because he thought it’d make him sound lame or corny. Or God forbid, soft. “Why would you want to leave? Everyone in the underground scene already loves you. They’re gonna call you a traitor, just like they did to Nacseo.”

“Do you think I’m a traitor, Yuri?” he asks. When she responds with a beat of silence, he looks more betrayed than she could ever feel. “Yuri.”

“Why would you want to leave?” she repeats. “Look, I’m just saying—why would the company suddenly switch gears like that? Don’t you think that’s suspicious? What if they’re scamming you into debt? What if they’re trying to force you into a slave contract or something?!”

“God, why are you suddenly so against this? You sound like my parents right now!” he yells. “You know, of all people, I would’ve thought you’d be the one to get it.”

“What—of course I get it!” she huffs. “I handed you the flyer, I watched you perform, I waited for you when you told your family about it! There’s just no good reason to leave the underground scene to become an idol. The risks are just too much, Namjoon!”

“Well, I—no, you know what? I don’t need to justify myself to you!” he yells, despite proceeding to do just that. “I’m not just gonna stay in the underground because—because you want me to!”

“I just—why would you want to be an idol anyway?” she shoots back, scrambling for some bullshit reason that doesn’t sound as desperate as please don’t leave me. “They’re gonna control what you eat and who you see and everything! Everything’s gonna be different, Namjoon! We won’t be able to go to DGBD and we won’t be able to go out together like this anymore because they’ll throw you into a scandal over some stupid rumors and they’ll never let me see you again.”

“Wait, so—so this isn’t about me, right?” he says. He scoffs, shaking his head, “Yeah, this isn’t about me at all! This has nothing to do with what you think is going to affect me and everything to do with what’s going to affect you! This is all about you!”

“Shut up!” she yells back. “It’s not like that!”

“Really? Because I’m not so sure,” he says, and immediately regrets it when his doubt makes her look at him like she’s been struck. But he just keeps going. He can’t stop himself, no matter how much his conscience screams at him to. “If you were actually thinking about me, you’d be listening to what I have to say, you’d be taking everything that’s happened up until now into account—but you’re not! Why is that? Thinking with your gut instead of your brain again?”

“You’re—you’re talking too fast! Slow down!” she’s crying now, but it doesn’t register for either of them. She puts her hands over her ears, like she’s a little kid listening to her parents fight again. “Just shut up for one second, okay?! Shut up! Shut up! You know I’m no good with words!”

“I thought you were more mature than this!” he yells. “Fuck, you’re just—you really are just a little kid, you know? Seriously, you want me to throw away an opportunity for my family to let me do what I actually wanna do? So I can stay with you and the rest of the losers—”

They both freeze, mouths open in shock as the weight of his words set in.

“Wait, I—I didn’t mean that, I—” he’s stuttering, trying to find the words to fix things, even though he knows in his heart that he can’t take it back. “You’re—you’re not a loser—” He takes a step toward her, arms outstretched with the promise of comfort. 

But she refuses it, taking a step back into the streetlight. She looks so small, hands curled into her chest, so far away from him.

The world hits him all at once. They’re just two teenagers yelling in the Ilsan streets at night. She bows her head down, but he can still see the tears in her eyes, glistening under the street lamps.

“You should go home,” she says softly.

“Yeah,” he agrees.

“I’ll walk with you.” 

“Okay.” 

It’s an awkward walk back, to say the least. He’s still mad, and he knows she’s still mad, so he makes no move to touch her as she walks next to him. She doesn’t reach out to grasp his hand like she always does, instead awkwardly linking her pinkies together, like she doesn’t know where her hands belong if not in his.

“We’re here,” she says, stopping at the sidewalk across the street from his house—like she’s not welcome, like she wasn’t lying on his bedroom floor just weeks ago. Weird how fast things can change.

“Hey,” he says, feeling a sense of relief when she looks up at him instead of ignoring him. He almost doesn’t want to break eye contact, like if he does he’ll never have another chance. Still, he reaches into his bag, fishing through the energy drinks and coffee cans at the bottom he’d bought earlier that day, originally purchased with the express purpose of keeping himself awake during training. But this is ok, too. He settles on giving her a Baba Vanilla Delight, because he knows she likes sweet things.

“Drink this,” he says as he hands it to her. “So you don’t fall asleep on the subway. There are weirdos on the train, you know. If any weird old guys try talking to you, call your brother, okay?”

“Okay,” she says, popping open the metal tab and drinking. After a couple of gulps, there’s silence, before Yuri leans forward and gently presses her head against his chest. Reflexively, he places a hand atop her head. No patting or stroking. Just a gentle, awkward, weight.

“You should go inside,” she says.

“Yeah,” he agrees, but neither of them make the move to part. He doesn’t know why. He’s still mad at her and she’s still mad at him. But it just feels right. When it happens, she’s the one to initiate it, breaking away from his touch to sip at the coffee in her hands again.

“Bye,” she says.

“Bye,” he says back, even though his gut tells him not to. 

There’s a sense of finality to it, somehow.

Namjoon turns around sharply so he doesn’t have to think about it, but makes the mistake of looking over his shoulder one last time. She has yet to budge, sipping at her coffee and watching to make sure he gets into his house safely, even though she’s still upset. 

I care, I care, her gaze says. He thinks he’ll know that forever.

But he doesn’t know that she starts crying as soon as he steps inside his house, or that she cries the whole way home, or that when she’s on the subway, she takes her journal out of her messenger bag and plops it in her lap to scribble a pathetic, self-aware message onto her epiphany list.

Epiphany #13: Lim Yuri will never stop caring about Kim Namjoon. Never ever ever. Not in a million years.

What a coincidence that it lands on such an unlucky number.

April 07, 2010. Big Hit Entertainment Building, Seoul, South Korea.

Lim Yuri makes her way to the Big Hit Entertainment building with nothing but a coffee in her hand and conviction in her heart. She’s nervous for a multitude of reasons.

For one, she’s about to interrogate an old music mogul when she’s a fifteen year-old girl that barely scrapes five foot nothing. No matter what bullshit her father has put the family through, she still stands firm with his advice that old men in the music industry are bad news. 

Secondly, she’s not supposed to be here. Nobody knows she took the subway here—she told her brother she was taking the subway to a friend’s house and really, it’s his fault for believing her lie. He should know damn well that she doesn’t have friends.

Thirdly, the coffee enhances every nervous feeling beating inside of her body. She feels like her heart is going to beat out of her chest. Regardless, she’s come too far to turn back now. Yuri raps her knuckles on the Big Hit building’s front door three times before ringing the doorbell.

As she waits, she can’t help but notice that the building is pretty small, especially for an entertainment company. Kinda shabby, if she’s being honest. Man, this place is poor poor. She wonders if they can even afford trainees.

When a staff member opens the door, she tells them she wants to talk to the CEO. He narrows his eyes suspiciously at the little girl and tells her to schedule a meeting ahead of time. When she hands him ₩20000, his eyes widen and he directs her to sit in the waiting room. Damn, really? These people were cheap.

Minutes later, another staff member directs her to the Hitman Bang’s office upstairs. She hates to be judgmental, but this place is like. The shitters. The floors are dirty and the paint is peeling off the walls and the halls are a tight squeeze through. When she makes it up to his office, she’s not surprised to see how small it is. She sits herself down onto the seat in front of him and opens her mouth to speak, but he quickly cuts her off.

“Here, sign in first,” he says. She expects him to direct her to a computer or a card reader or something, but he hands her a clipboard with a stack of binder paper on it instead. The sight makes her wrinkle her nose, but she signs it anyway.

Whew, this is trashy.

“Lim Yuri,” he reads her name off the clipboard, “What brings you here today?”

“I, uh,” she pauses to shrug. “Just wanted to talk, I guess.”

“About?” he asks, quirking a brow.

“Kim Namjoon,” she admits. She’s not sure why saying his name aloud makes her face so hot. “He’s, um, a trainee in your company, I think. Or is going to be. I’m not really sure, uh, we haven’t really talked recently. Gonna need a status check on that one.”

“He’s coming in to sign his contract with his parents next week. It took a while, but he wore ‘em down,” he jokes, shaking a fist in victory. “So not yet, but soon.”

“This sounds like the kind of information that a company shouldn’t be sharing so freely. Haven’t you heard of contract confidentiality?” she huffs. “I came here to protect Namjoon, and you already seem like you’re not doing a very good job.” Old man Bang’s eyebrows shoot towards his hairline in surprise, obviously not expecting the little girl in front of him to be so serious about all this.

“Well, uh, he hasn’t signed any contract with us yet,” he justifies himself. “So I haven’t technically said anything confidential.”

“Nice save.”

“Thanks,” he says, before awkwardly clearing his throat. Regaining composure, he continues, “I can assure you, we’re doing our best to protect our artists, and will do the same for him once he’s with us. What do you think you need to protect your friend from?”

“I don’t know, weird industry stuff that he doesn’t know about!” she says, throwing her hands up in the air in frustration. “Like a slave contract or eternal debt or some weird shitty concept that he doesn’t wanna do, okay? I don’t know!”

“Relax,” he says. She huffs and folds her hands back into her lap. “Your friend is in good hands. It’s easy to take advantage of young trainees, but I can assure you that this is not the case here. We’re forming this next group around him. Because of him. We respect his creative decisions and will be giving him near-full reigns on whatever projects he wants to work on. I’ve heard him rap before, so Lord knows he can.”

“Which one?” she asks after a beat of silence. She can’t fight the hint of a smile off her face, despite the circumstances.

“Huh?”

“What song did you hear him rap?” she asks curiously. “Was it the one about the detective? I like that one. That one’s my favorite.” He blinks a couple of times in surprise.

“Yes, I heard that one,” he says, nodding. “He’s very talented. Incredibly introspective for your age.” 

“I know,” she says, almost boastfully. “Everyone knows except him.”

“Do they now?”

“Yeah. I even asked Sleepy,” she continues bragging. “You know, from Untouchable? ‘Tell Me Why’? Yeah, him, and he agreed, too. I just know he’s destined for greatness, and—”

“You’re right,” he says. “When I first heard his audition reel, I thought, ‘this person deserves to be an idol.’ I didn’t even have to see him to know that.” Yuri lets herself smile at that.

“Glad to know we’re on the same page.”

“And I do know Sleepy,” he adds. “In fact, he’s the one who showed me your friend’s mixtape and passed his contact information onto me.” Yuri’s eyes widen, genuinely surprised that he did that even after she harassed him at Rolling Hall. Outside the bathroom, no less.

“You know, I’m surprised that you know Sleepy,” he continues slowly. She can practically hear him thinking as he narrows his eyes at her. “Are you Glass, by any chance? The one from outside the bathroom?” 

Is that her thing now? She hates it here. His tone isn’t exactly flattering, but what’s she gonna do, lie?

“...I am she.”

“You’re that Yuri?” he asks, and she grimaces. 

“Yes.” She’s expecting him to like, shove a cross in her face or something. Instead, he just laughs.

“I heard you gave him an earful.”

“Well. Harassing old men on my friends’ behalves has recently become a hobby of mine,” she says wryly. He shakes his head, but even the old man can’t resist another laugh at that.

“That also means you made those beats, right? The ones in his audition reel?” he asks. 

“Yes, sir. Every last one,” she says truthfully.

“Interesting.” He folds his hands in front of his mouth and leans forward in his desk, and Yuri can practically see the cogs turning in his head. She can’t imagine what he’s thinking so hard about.

“Hypothetically, if we were to debut your friend in a boy group,” he begins.

“Oh God, I don’t like hypotheticals,” she interrupts. He laughs at her antics.

“It’d be a smart idea to have a female producer,” he continues. “Because if you think about it, that’d be our main audience, right? Girls around your age, give or take a few years?” She nods slowly as she thinks about the implications of what he’s saying.

“Yes,” she says after a long pause. “That would be smart.”

“And we’re already understaffed,” he admits. “It’d be a great help. I don’t know how much I’d be able to pay you—” 

“I can tell—”

“—but you’ll be working with your friend, right? Isn’t that a good idea?” He raises a brow at her, and he doesn’t need to say anything more for her to know that it’s a question and an offer all in one. 

In all honesty, it doesn’t sound that bad. Doing what she likes and working with a friend? Getting ‘near-full’ creative reigns? It sounds too good to be true, even to herself. She can’t exactly say she trusts in this, but it seems like it’s worth a shot. She heaves a sigh.

“You got a business card?” she asks. He seems to panic at that, awkwardly scrambling around his desk. Yuri nervously links her pinkies together as he spends a good five minutes opening and closing and opening his desk drawers again and again.

“Uh, you know what?” He pulls a sticky note off the top of the stack on his desk and writes his email address and phone number. Yuri has to stop herself from grimacing. The disorganization of this little company makes her cringe, but she guesses she’ll just have to take a leap of faith.

April 17, 2010. Han River, Seoul, South Korea.

Yuri links her pinkies nervously as she sits, staring down at the dosirak boxes in her lap.

She’s on a park bench by the Han River, praying to every God she can think of that Namjoon shows up. She’d texted him earlier that week asking him if they could meet there, to which he replied with a simple ‘okay’ text—a very bad sign when coming from the wordiest guy alive. But they did just have a really bad falling out, so she supposes beggars can’t be choosers.

“Hey,” she hears a familiar voice say from behind her, accompanied by a tap on the shoulder. It makes her whip around so fast she nearly smacks him with her ponytail.

“Oh, um, hey! Hey,” she says nervously. Namjoon laughs fondly, shaking his head.

“You look like you got stood up for a date,” he jokes, taking a seat next to her on the bench. She can’t help but blush as his knee bumps against hers. They sit in silence for a moment, as was usual in the Namjoon-Yuri dynamic. Despite the awkward air about them, it dawns upon her just how much she’s missed him, even just by sitting next to him like this.

“Here,” her voice cuts through the quiet as she drops one of the dosirak boxes in his lap. “I, um. I made this for you. And I wanted to say I’m sorry.” Namjoon clicks his tongue.

“Don’t be,” he says, shaking his head. “I should be the one saying sorry. I overreacted and said shitty things to you that I shouldn’t have. I’m embarrassed, really… I’m the older one, you know? I should’ve been the one to apologize first, if anything. I know you say things because you care, or because you don’t want to be lonely… and I get that. Nobody wants to be lonely. Nobody deserves to be lonely, especially a person like you who always does things for other people.”

“Namjoon-oppa.”

“Hm?”

“You have this—” she cuts herself off, voice cracking. “You have this bad habit of making me cry.”

Wordlessly, Namjoon shrugs off his jacket, draping it over her shoulders and placing a comforting hand atop her head. He coos when she leans into his touch. It makes her chuckle softly, even through the tears. She slips her arms into the sleeves, using them to wipe those tears away.

“Sorry for getting snot on your jacket,” she sniffles. He shakes his head, moving his hand down from her head to rub comforting circles into her back.

“Keep it. It looks better on you anyway,” he assures her. He drops a jab in there, too, if only to reach for a bit of normalcy. “And I just took it off, so. It’s got that boy smell you like.” He laughs when she smacks him with one of the long sleeves.

“Suuuure,” she says sarcastically. She rolls her eyes at his words, sincerely doubting that she looks good in anything in her current snotty, teary-eyed state—let alone a jacket that’s like, four sizes too big for her. But Namjoon has, embarrassingly enough, read her for filth. She will very much be keeping the jacket for as long as it has that very distinct Namjoon smell.

She leans her head on his shoulder and realizes she really, really missed him. That’s just the truth of it. She missed him and his smell and his dimples and his weird metaphors and his big wrinkly brain.

“I just want to make things clear,” she begins nervously, “If you think signing with Big Hit is the way to achieve your dreams and stuff, I want you to do that. I want you to know that I’ll be right there with you.”

“Thanks,” he says. “It’d be tough to know someone I cared about wasn’t supportive of this.” The admission makes her blush, but she shakes her head.

“No, I mean like, literally,” she admits, laughing nervously. “Um, I went to their building the other week, you know? To check it out and see if there was anything weird happening there. I, um, talked to the old man upstairs—old man Bang, not God.” He laughs at that. It melts her heart a little. “But, um, yeah. He was talking about how they’re understaffed and had heard about my producing and stuff and thought it’d be a good idea since we worked together already. We’re not discussing contract stuff for like, another two weeks? But before that happens, um, I just wanted to let you know before you sign yours. I won’t do anything that like, forces you to work with me or—”

“You don’t need my permission to do anything,” he says. “You want to still work together, right? Isn’t that why you went there?”

“Yes.” A half-truth, but she’s not gonna admit she harassed that poor old man to ensure his safety. That’d probably be a blow to his ego, and seeing as they just made up, that’s the last thing she wants.

“Then you should. We already know how the other works. It just makes sense,” he says. “And we’ll be together.” And her whole stomach does flips.

Her whole mind is going a mile a minute, then. It barely registers when he holds out his fist, and a couple awkward seconds pass before she has the brainpower to bump it back.

When he smiles at her, dimples on display and teeth poking out from between his lips, it feels like a punch to the gut. The relief she’d felt swell in her chest when she heard his voice is nothing compared to the tingling sensation she feels in her stomach right now. Suddenly, she understands what her older brother meant that night she asked about Donghyuk, and he said some bullshit about not knowing until you know.

She gets it now because she knows. It’s going to race through her mind every time she looks at him. She doesn’t need to write it down, but she knows she will when she gets home, if only to get it out. She needs an outlet for what she feels like is going to be etched into her heart forever.

Epiphany #14: Lim Yuri is stupidly, uncontrollably, undeniably in love with Kim Namjoon.

#era.glass #fic.epiphany #laruna.conn #laruna.dev #ship.yujoon #writings

[atopearth]

The Men of Yoshiwara: Ohgiya Part 1 - Takigawa Route

Now for the supposedly better sequel! I think it’s nice that the heroine Kiyoha is actually in Yoshiwara because she’s of age now, and this is kinda the thing women do to experience love and men. It’s kinda funny that the heroine this time around is really rich and even has a bodyguard (Musashi) with her! Hmm Ageha seems like a soft and nice guy that is actually really cheeky. He looks quite westernised though. Takigawa looks pretty cool, I think he might be my favourite looks wise, but he seems like the stern and strict type haha. Gakuto looks like a pirate with that eye patch haha! Utsusemi looks like a flirt maybe? Asagiri is definitely my least favourite, he looks like the haughty kind of guy that would bully the girl lol. Honestly though, I quite enjoy how Musashi helps Kiyoha on the side by explaining to her the manners and protocol of being in places like Ohgiya. Which is something I wish Kikuya explored, but I guess to be fair, Kikuya was more casual, whereas Ohgiya is the finest establishment in Yoshiwara, so the geisha must be pretty high class and they probably expect their customers to be high class too. I feel like Takigawa is quite similar to Takao though haha! Noooo! You can’t choose Musashi??? Why make him look so nice and cool too then?! I’m kinda sad now LOL. Anyway~ going in order (on the Nintendo Switch), so Takigawa it is.

Ooh if you look at the character introductions, Takigawa’s popularity is apparently equal to Takao! That’s interesting! I should have known that if Takigawa is the most popular geisha, then he’s definitely very prideful and confident that he can make Kiyoha fall for him and make her look at him and not anyone else. But it seems like Takigawa knows how Kiyoha feels though. It seems like he can tell that Kiyoha is only here to fulfill her duties as a woman, and does not intend to give her heart to him because she thinks everything about this is “fake”. Musashi is a great attendant/bodyguard! Not only does he protect her but he’s also her confidant! She shares her problems and worries with him and he advises her as well as encourages her to follow what she thinks is right to do. I really like him🥺🥺 I liked his advice that instead of letting Takigawa do what he wants, she should be the one to make Takigawa fall for her instead. I think that would be much more fun and interesting than just being on guard against him for thinking that winning over the pretty rich girls is just like a fun game.

It’s actually pretty refreshing to see that Kiyoha is physically attracted to Takigawa, but she refuses to give her heart to him even after they’ve had sex. It was so anticlimactic in a sense, because she easily fulfilled her family’s wishes of her, but at the same time, she really didn’t. All she did was physically do it as if she finished a chore lol. On the other hand, seeing other women insult Takigawa belittling him as just a geisha blah blah was quite saddening. It just goes to show that even though Takigawa is a top geisha, is super popular and loved, but in the end, he’ll still be treated as trash by customers because they just think of geisha as lowly people there to entertain them. When Takao said Takigawa was a boring person who has never fallen in love before, it kinda made sense why it felt like Kiyoha and Takigawa’s interactions always felt so “empty”. They’re both literally just carrying out their duties as men and women on this island and they both refuse to give their hearts to the fake marriages and love relationships in Yoshiwara. Takigawa’s words of “love” when they shared their night together rang hollow as just “words”, whereas the thing with Takao is that even though his words are always flirty and it doesn’t seem like he’s serious, he’s actually very sincere with his flirting, and I think that’s the difference between a guy who can shake your heart and one that can’t. Takao’s few lines really made me remember why I was honestly ensnared by him in Kikuya haha.

Lmao at Takigawa insulting but complimenting Kiyoha at the same time haha. Kinda exciting for Kiyoha to be in the charge of the outfits for his procession for her though, it’s kinda nice that she’s actually motivated about something lol. Wow, to think that Takigawa actually knew about Kiyoha from long ago because she was like a girl with a magical pouch who gave him candy and an origami crane when he was a kid. It’s kinda cute how he remembers that. It’s nice that they describe the procession as like a marriage ceremony, since they literally do something like a parade and then the geisha comes together with the woman as if they’re now officially tied together as partners forever. It’s kinda sweet when you think about it. Although I felt that Takigawa was cold and hollow with his words before, when he said that he wants Kiyoha to believe in his love for her and how he wants her to think that choosing him brought her happiness, I was  rather touched. Despite what things he may be hiding and how “loveless” their relationship felt before, right now it really feels like they have become much more honest with each other. It was obvious that the procession was going to end badly with how much they wanted the procession to succeed lol. But to think that they would split open Takigawa’s kimono and show the world his tattoo that his mum branded on him before he was sent to Yoshiwara... It’s saddening to think that Takigawa was treated horribly by his mother too, just like that little boy Kiyoha encountered before. I guess it’s stressful to be a mother to boys though, since they basically get stolen from you no matter what, you’re basically raising them to be sent to Yoshiwara eventually… It was very sweet but saddening of Takigawa to apologise to Kiyoha about the possible impact of this on her family business and how it ruined all the effort she put into the procession, I mean I’m sure he’s embarrassed and hurt by having his tattoo shown to the world too but he’s thinking about her first. It hurt to see Takigawa so down about his tattoo surfacing as a kind of nightmare of the past for him. Well, as expected, Takigawa is the big brother of that little boy~

Wow, I can’t believe that in order to attract customers at the window interested in his tattoo, they used to lash his back (to keep the tattoo visible and prominent since his skin needs to be flushed to see it) constantly! I can see why Takigawa would want to hide all that and just want to keep his perfect image as the top geisha.. he really suffered blood and tears to get to this position. I think it’s really sweet that Kiyoha finally remembered him, and it’s not like she completely forgot about him, she just thought he was a girl when they were young haha. I can see why a first love would be so important to geisha though, because in the end, everything here in Yoshiwara is fake, yet it takes up most of their lives, so it’s unlikely for them to find any kind of true love during their teenage to adult years. It seems like the story wants to redeem the mother’s “tattoo” as a form of love to remember her children, and I don’t deny that she probably had a bit of those intentions with the wings and everything, but it doesn’t change the fact that she abused Takigawa enough as a child that he himself chose to go to Yoshiwara before he was even forced to, and it doesn’t change that to this day she is still abusing her next kid. Sure, it’s definitely a terrible thing to give birth to boys, let alone having two, the amount of stress and sadness etc must be unbearable, but that doesn’t mean she can be excused for her actions of traumatising children imo.

Honestly, I don’t know why but I never really thought about the repercussions of buying out a popular geisha to the point that it could affect business. But I guess that’s true, if Kiyoha bought Takigawa, she would be depriving all the other women of him, and since the whole island is mainly women, their business could take a hit because of her selfishness of wanting to monopolise him. It doesn’t help that he’s recently become even more popular due to what happened at the procession. But I assume that with Kiyoha’s family’s wealth and influence, it should be fine imo. Um, that was easy. I feel like the law on this island is really….whatever. So, on one hand, they arrest Takigawa’s mother ready to execute her, but then after Takigawa and his brother say it was all a prank and that she didn’t abuse them, they just let her go??? Did they not check for bruises and marks from long term abuse? Honestly, I’m baffled at how loose the law is, it’s so ready to kill people but at the same time so ready to let people go, it’s pretty ridiculous. So glad Takigawa didn’t forgive her and took his brother away from her. It’s nice that he’s giving her the chance to change because he doesn’t want to regret leaving her to die even though he hates her I guess. It was really quite touching to see Takigawa arrive at the Somei family house and be welcomed so nicely by Kiyoha’s mother, they bought/took in both him and his brother and that’s so sweet. I love how Takigawa’s contribution to the family business is by showcasing their clothes to courtesans, modelling is a great job for him since he’s so beautiful! I like the other ending as well though! Seeing Takigawa make sales on clothes at Yoshiwara utilising his information network was pretty cool. I also really enjoyed their little trip to the mainland, it’s always cute to see their fascination and interest in different cultures and products.

Overall, Takigawa was all right. I thought I’d like him just as much as Takao in Kikuya, but honestly, even though it was pretty nice to see the usual transition of cold guy to wholesome guy kinda story, I think the transition was lacking. In the beginning, I could really feel how both Kiyoha and Takigawa were interested in each other but didn’t want to involve their hearts in this relationship because it’s “fake”. However, I couldn’t feel it when they both “loved each other” and wanted to spend the rest of their lives with the other. I don’t really feel their romance. But I did feel for Takigawa’s childhood, it was pretty terrible, and I’m glad Kiyoha supported him and everything, but yeah honestly, I expected more charisma from Takigawa? He’s supposedly the top geisha so I honestly expected to be really drawn to him etc, but I think he was pretty normal lol, the best thing about him was his looks, and even then, Asagiri is pretty beautiful, so yeah, beauty can’t carry you that high! Haha, oh well. He’s not bad, just not great🙃

#the men of yoshiwara #the men of yoshiwara ohgiya

[gwilyoubemine]

Headcanon: being roger's close friend and meeting his band's smoking hot guitarist for the first time

honestly this is way too long and i should be writing my music business essay.

word count: 48399333838$8k words.

featuring gwil!bri and ben!roger

• you and roger have been close friends for a few years now, it all started when he tried to hit on you during a night out

• let's just say despite his charming ways and the enthusiasm shown, he was unsuccessful in getting any action

• after shutting down the romantic advances, you started to chat more casually and exchanged numbers at the end of the night since the two of you seemed to get on pretty well

• you ended up sticking around and becoming one of his good friends, it became normal for the two of you to spend lots of time together- always showing each other your favourite tv shows and movies, going to roger's favourite pub nearly every week, accompanying him to concerts

• one day when the two of you were shopping for snacks for your movie night, he announced he had formed a band with some fellow uni students and wanted you to attend one of their upcoming gigs at a bar close to his place

• of course you agreed, you knew how important music was to roger and you were excited to see him play with a band finally

• the night of the performance rolls around pretty quickly and when you finally get to the bar shortly after 9pm, the place is bustling with people, both seated and standing

• you assume that for the duration of the set your attention will be focused on rog drumming his heart out but after entering the small room allocated for 'back stage' use and laying eyes on the band's guitarist, you know your gaze is going to be elsewhere

• he is extremely tall with a mass of dark curly hair that settles across his broad shoulders, a strong nose, and stunning eyes

• luckily, you aren't left gawking for too long as roger is quick to introduce you to the guitarist of the band, who you find out is called brian

• he offers you a hand shake along with a 'it's lovely to meet you' and the sound of his soft voice alone makes you feel a little breathless

• he flashes you a small smile as you shake his hand and you feel your stomach swoop as he keeps his eyes trained on yours

• roger, who is often rather oblivious in these situations, doesn't notice any tension from either one of you and breaks the moment by walking in between you and giving your arm a squeeze

• "right then, meet you after the set, love. we'll be on in ten."

• you wish him luck before moving your gaze to brian again and giving him a quick nod

• after you have left the room, brian busies himself with adjusting the knobs on his guitar as he ponders on how to ask roger if you two of you are dating

• "is that your girlfriend, rog?" he ends up asking, his face still pointed down at his guitar

• roger actually chuckles at this

• "nah, mate, she's just a good friend."

• brian's response is a simple "ah" but if roger was paying more attention, he would have definitely seen the poorly hidden look of satisfaction on brian's face

• as the evening progresses and the band play their set, your eyes stay glued to brian for the entire night- wandering up and down his form, honing in on his focused, and incredibly handsome, expression as he switches from note to note and from chord to chord flawlessly

• the small amount of alcohol already in your system is making you feel a little dazed as you continue to watch the guitarist in front of you. it seems to fuel the fire that brian had clearly started in you from the moment his eyes found yours backstage

• the most frustrating thing is how brian's shirt is not buttoned all the way up, showcasing his glorious collarbones and a tempting amount of his bare chest

• every inch of skin on display looks so kissable even with the light sheen of sweat covering it and as you continue to watch him perform, you find that your hands are dying to reach out and touch him

• the intense, and painfully intricate, guitar solos end up being as frustrating as the not-fully-buttoned-up shirt and the impact this man is having on you is embarrassing to say the least

• just watching his long fingers pull and pluck at the guitar strings makes you want to squeeze your thighs together

• it's honestly a wonder how he moves so quickly between each string, his technique is practically perfect

• by the end of the set you are feeling pretty worked up and lost for words, having spent the majority of the time being mesmerised by brian

• roger had played fantastically as per usual but that thought seemed pretty minor in comparison to the feelings you were experiencing as a result of brian

• because of how packed the bar is, you end up waiting outside in the fresh air- which feels nice and cool against your warm cheeks

• you text roger to meet you outside and after a few minutes of thinking back on the set, your thoughts are disturbed by the sound of a familiar voice

• "d'you enjoy the show, love?" roger asks with a grin, wrapping an arm around your shoulder

• "it was pretty amazing, you played great."

• brian is right behind him with his arms crossed over his chest and his guitar bag slung around his back. he seems a bit more quiet than before, and slightly worn out, but still manages to radiate the same kind energy

• "oh, what d'you think about brian? bloody great, he is." roger then adds, nodding this head towards his friend

• brian's resulting smile is quite modest, and his eyes are trained on you as he waits for you to answer roger's question

• "he is bloody great, you're right" you say, meeting brian's eyes. "you're great. fantastic, actually."

• "thank you for saying so. on that note, i better be off, rog. takes a while to get back to my place from here and it's pretty late already."

• roger is quick to tell brian that he's speaking nonsense and that it's about time they get a drink to celebrate how well the set went, adding that you and brian were welcome to stay at his place seeing as he lived so close

• brian is reluctant but ends up agreeing after a lot of begging on behalf of roger

• "you won't regret it, mate. i'll get the two of you a drink, it's on me." he says, patting brian's face lightly and giving you a teasing kiss on the side of your head

• as soon as roger leaves, you become aware of the growing tension between you and brian

• "does rog always kiss you like that?"

• "oh no, not really. he gets especially happy after playing shows and becomes more touchy. he's just playing around." you say, wrapping your arms around yourself

• he asks you if you are cold and gestures to your arms, and you give him a little nod

• "the real question is: are you cold?" you ask him with a chuckle, your eyes falling to his exposed skin. "that shirt is rolled up at the sleeves and barely buttoned up."

• his lips quirk up at that comment and a soft laugh leaves him. "it's just how i wear my shirts. m'probably immune to the cold right now since i get pretty hot on stage."

• "yeah, it looked pretty intense up there."

• "ah, do you think so?" he asks, his voice lowering. "i did spot you in the crowd, you seemed pretty intrigued with my guitar."

• you stand there feeling quite speechless, unsure of how to respond to him. his hot gaze insinuates he knows you were staring at him and the thought of him being aware of that has you swallowing thickly

• "well, you're quite intriguing. it's not only the guitar i was looking at." you manage to murmur and you're honestly shocked as to where the confidence to say such a thing came from

• brian's mouth parts in response and before he gets the chance to answer, you're saved from the situation at hand by the one and only roger, swaying ever so slightly with two drinks in his hands and one awkwardly cupped in his elbow

• he manages to pass the drinks to you both with minimal struggle and flashes a lopsided grin. "had a shot or two, hope you didn't mind waiting for me. actually, maybe it was three. it doesn't matter anyway. cheers, bri! cheers, love. that was a cracking show."

• at this point in time, you're pretty thankful roger is here to divert the conversation. the tension between you and brain is undeniable at this point

• even though roger has no clue regarding what's going on, you're very aware of brian sneaking glances at you, of his adam's apple bobbing up and down every time he takes a long sip of his drink

• you manage to push the situation to the back of your mind as you engage in conversation with the pair about the band and what they are currently working on

• by the time brian has called a cab for the three of you to head back to roger's house, you have practically forgotten about what you said earlier

• and when the cab arrives, you end up seated on the left with brian in the middle and a very drunk roger slumped next to him. the only thing you can register is brian's thigh pressing against yours. the heat radiating from his body

• "roger is pretty smashed." brian says, breaking the silence and you're quick to nod and crack an amused smile

• "he is." roger slurs, slumping further down the seat as he takes his sunglasses off of his head to put them on. "wake me up when we get to my place, bri."

• you mutter something about about roger always being like this and brian nods, his lips curved into a knowing smile. he had clearly been out with roger a few times

• the taxi is silent again and you find yourself mulling over the conversion from earlier, as well as the image of brian's gaze fixed on yours. the way his eyes seemed to darken when you admitted that you had been staring at him.

• "usually i'm more focused on the music rather than the crowd when i play these shows." brian says quietly, his eyes ahead of him. "but i really couldn't stop myself from looking for your face amongst all those others. and bloody hell, your eyes were on me every time i found you."

• your cheeks heat up instantly. "i...i didn't even see you looking at me." is the only thing you can manage to say

• "i believe you were a bit preoccupied." his voice sounds like honey, thick and silky. "what were you so focused on?" he asks you and you're sure his lips are close to your ear

• you turn your head towards him and his face is only inches from yours. his gaze is just as serious as it was when he was playing on stage a little earlier

• your eyes fall to his lips before your brain can register your forwardness and do something about it

• "you're mesmerising on stage." you admit quietly, your eyes lifting to meet his. "i'm sure a lot of people couldn't take their eyes off of you.

• some of his curls are brushing against you now with his close proximity, and brian's stare is hot and fervent "especially you, love."

• roger calling you 'love' was one thing but brian saying it gives the word a whole new meaning. it felt so casual coming out of roger's mouth but coming from brian, the word sent shivers through your body

• and brian seemed to be very aware of his impact on you, he knew exactly what he was doing

• "can you blame me?" you whisper, finding yourself leaning closer to him. "you looked so good. you look so good."

• brian looks like he needs a few seconds to compose himself

• "you don't how bloody good it feels to hear that from someone as beautiful as you." he ends up murmuring, his lips brushing over yours ever so slightly. it takes all of your self control not to curl your fingers into his shirt and kiss him senseless.

• that's when the cab comes to an abrupt stop outside of roger's apartment. your head snaps towards the front of the car to catch a glimpse of the driver looking pretty uncomfortable and you are quick to remove your seat belt, your eyes moving to stare at the floor

• "uh, i'll wake roger up. is it okay if you sort out the money, brian? i can pay you back tomorrow." you blurt out, barely giving brian time to nod his head in agreement as you scramble out of the taxi and move around to roger's side. your mind is a chaotic mess after having brian's lips that close to yours.

• you are tapping roger gently at first but he seems to be knocked out so it takes a bit of shaking to get him to resurface. you tell him that you're outside of his apartment and he's giving you an 'alright, alright, m'getting out' as he stumbles out of the door. he reaches into his pocket to pull out his keys and throws them to you with what can only be described as one of the most pathetic aims you've ever seen

•"open the door for me, love. where's bri?"

• "i'm here, just paid the cab driver." brian says as he appears next to roger, his guitar bag hanging off his shoulder. your cheeks feel hot as you stare at him.

• "'i'll pay you tomorrow, mate." roger says, slapping a hand on brian's back

• you turn away from the pair and go straight towards roger's door to unlock it. once you're in, you immediately start to busy yourself with pulling out the clean sheets roger kept folded away in his room. you steal one of this white t-shirts and add it to your pile of sheets

• roger is slumped at his kitchen table when you get downstairs, with brian leaning against the the counter- his arms crossed again. you try to avoid gaping at his prominent biceps.

• "went in your bedroom to get these sheets, rog. hope you don't mind. stole one of your t-shirts too.'

• roger's barely coherent as he tells you it's fine and asks if you want to sleep in his bed with him, as well as something about not letting a lady sleep on a shitty sofa

• brian tries to look indifferent but you see his shoulders become tense at roger's suggestion

• you tell roger that you don't mind sleeping on the sofa and that he should head up seeing as he's so tired. you're laying the sheets out on the two sofas when roger comes by to ruffle your hair and flash you a wobbly smile. "thanks for coming tonight, love."

• he calls out a goodnight to brian and with that, he's stomping up the stairs as he strips off his shirt. you know he will be asleep as soon as he throws himself onto his bed.

• "...i don't mind which sofa i sleep on, so just take your pick-" you start to say as you turn around to face brian, the rest of your sentence dying in your mouth as his hands land on your face to drag your lips to his

• he kisses you like he's been waiting to get a taste of your lips for a long time and it's not long before he is sliding his tongue over your bottom lip to get your lips to part for him

• you open them with a moan that's swallowed up his mouth and as his tongue starts to stroke yours, you bury your hands into his hair to tug softly at his curls- a gesture that earns you the hottest groan you have ever heard in your life

• he doesn't pull away from your lips, even as he backs up to take a seat on the sofa. you barely have time to take in a breath as his large hands move to your hips to drag you down onto his lap, his lips meeting yours again

• "b-brian" you moan out shakily as his lips start to trail across your chin and down your neck, and as soon as his name leaves your lips, you hear his breath stutter as his grip on your hips turns vice-like. oh, how he enjoyed you calling out his name in such a sinful way

• "you're driving me crazy." he drawls against the sensitive skin of your neck. he drops a few light kisses there and slides his hands underneath your top. a whine leaves your lips when the rough pads of his fingers come into contact with your bare skin. "unable to keep your eyes off me all night and now so worked up, i have barely touched you."

• you don't know where this brian has come from but you don't question anything, you're so consumed with how badly you want him to touch you and kiss you some more

• "brian, please." you whisper out needily, your hands tugging at his curls again. you're starting to become aware of the growing tent in his pants and you can barely keep yourself from grinding down on his lap.

• brian's breath is harsh against your neck. "please what, love?" his voice sounding more raspy now. "tell me what you want."

• he pulls his head away from your neck and you're quick to cup his face and press your forehead against his. you can feel his heart thumping away with your chests pressed so tightly together.

• "touch me, brian." you gasp out against his lips. his nose is brushing against yours and his hands are unmoving, his hot palms remaining flush against your bare skin. "god, touch me, please."

• "fuck, you're so hot, love. just you wait, i've got a busy night planned for you."

stopping it there because i need to do my essay. oopsss : - )))

#brian may headcanon #gwil!brian #ben!roger #queen #brian may fic #gwilym lee #gwil!bri headcanon

[my-creative-hell]

Blind (Avengers au)

“Hey Hannah!” Iden calls from the other side of the room, Hannah automatically turning her head to look in the direction of the noise, though she obviously wouldn’t see anything.

Hannah had been blind for as long as she could remember, sight a distant memory of the past, not that that bothered her anymore. All Hannah could see were intense lights, and sometimes silhouettes thanks to that, but everything else was a mystery to her.

But she had gotten used to it, wearing steel toed and heeled boots to create noise whenever she walked, using the sound to ‘see’ the world around her in a sense. And when she was fighting or needed extra help, her ability would help her, the physical manifestations of shadows helping her navigate the world around her.

Using the sound of Iden’s voice, Hannah moves around the living room, bringing the cup of tea she had been making, the space mapped perfectly in her mind from living there so long until she knew she was beside her twin, able to feel the heat coming off of him, and able to hear him breathing.

“Yeah, what’s up?” She asks, instinctively looking down at him as she speaks, the behaviour learnt from pretending she could see so people would leave her alone in public. Plus, it made conversations much less awkward feeling.

Iden shifts on the sofa before answering, the material rustling underneath him as he picks up his own drink from the wooden table in front of him, taking a quick sip before he answers the question.

“Grave told me she had something to show you, and wants you to go into her office to see it.” Iden explains, Hannah smiling slightly. Grave was the youngest on the team, sixteen years old and already the most chaotic, albeit intelligent member. She was also the only one who didn’t know Hannah was blind; she was so good at playing the role of a sighted person.

“Ah, well I guess I’ll go see what she has in store.” Hannah jokes as she smiles at Iden, knowing he would be smiling at her as she turns on her heel, swiftly moving through the halls to the room next to Grave’s bedroom, her self-proclaimed office.

She could hear movement from inside, no doubt Grave doing something else unknown within the room, working on some new equipment or altering something she had stolen from somewhere to annoy people she didn’t like.

Hannah opens the door, stepping into the room as it swings open, and pulling it closed gently behind her. The noise Grave was making gave Hannah an exact idea of where she was in the room, Hannah moving to that spot at an even pace, not wanting to risk startling her or getting hit with who knows what.

She approaches the noise, a smile on her face as she raises her eyebrow, looking at the rough place she knew Grave’s head would be resting, very thankful for her blacked out eyes that didn’t allow you to know exactly where she was looking.

“Hey hun, what’s goin on?” Hannah asks, smiling, cocking her head as she listens to the shuffling noises Grave is making as she stops whatever it was she was doing when Hannah approached her.

Grave turns to look at her properly very nervous and excited, it showing through on her voice as she speaks, the sounds very high-pitched and elated but also slightly wavering and unsure.

“I um… I have plans for a new suit I’m working on a-and I wanted you to see it and tell me what you think!” Grave exclaims happily, though Hannah’s heart stuttered a bit. Shit. Obviously Hannah can’t fucking read, so she was going to have to bullshit.

“Oh, sure.” Hannah smiles, knowing Grave returns it as she begins to search for whatever it was she wanted to show to Hannah, setting down a sheet of paper Hannah could tell was probably almost as big as the table she set it on, the breeze being given off as it was set down being quite large.

“Here they are!” Grave exclaims, and Hannah didn’t need sight to know about the large grin that was currently on her face as she presents her work to Hannah.

Not wanting to admit to anything, Hannah does what she has been doing for years. She pretends, tilting her head down and shifting her eyes as if she was studying or reading something on the sheet. Hannah scrunches her face in confusion to add more believability to her claims as she stands up, plastering a slightly sheepish smile on her face.

“You know, reading has never been my forte, why don’t you just explain it to me, I’m sure I’d understand it better that way.” Hannah explains, smiling and hoping Grave would go along with it so she wouldn’t have to be what she feared would be a very awkward conversation with the younger girl.

She hears Grave shift and waits for her response, not wanting the awkward situation she fears to come to fruition, and thankfully, Grave rolls with it, voice excited as she speaks.

“Of course! There’s a faster reload for any shooty shooty bois, the suit is lighter so it’s easier to run, but it’s also stronger. It’s made out of a new metal I made-” Grave pauses as Hannah looks confused at that last part, pulling her eyebrows together in shock and confusion.

“Oh boy, you made a new metal?” Hannah questions, knowing Grave’s mind was mulling over how to explain her answer and contain her obvious excitement and happiness while doing it, though Hannah could clearly hear it no matter what she did.

“Yeah! It was just a thing I made out of boredom but then I realized it could be useful so…” Grave trails off, excitement evident and Hannah can feel her trying not to bounce around too much if at all, possibly not wanting to seem too childish, making Hannah smile properly, the grin lighting up her face as she speaks, voice gentle and kind.

“Well, I think that’s very cool and an excellent showcase of your intelligence, this is super amazing.” She compliments, knowing anything Grave would be creating would be an amazing marvel of technology, whether she could see it or not.

“Thank you!!!” Hannah can hear the surprised expression on her face as she speaks, clearly trying even harder not to jump around or anything that would so clearly show the happiness and excitement Hannah can feel pouring off of her, making Hannah’s grin so much more genuine.

“Of course, hun, its not problem, you know we all love everything you do.” Hannah points out, and it was the truth. Grave was the youngest, but she was a valuable member of the team and they all loved her like a family of bigger siblings, encouraging her intelligence and her knack for inventing incredible devices that had helped them out of so many sticky situations.

Hannah can hear Grave gripping onto her shirt in her excitement, the fabric being pulled upwards, Hannah pretty certain Grave was biting her shirt to stop herself jumping around, making her even happier when she hears Graves much more excited voice.

“I’m!!! Glad!!!” Grave exclaims happily, Hannah knowing the huge grin that was no doubt etched into her face as she speaks, making Hannah laugh lightly, her own happiness clear in her expressions.

“I’m very happy you are.” Hannah expresses this earnestly. Hannah and Grave were two of the closest within the group, adopting a very family like dynamic they both enjoyed, and it brightened any of Hannah’s days when Grave was having a genuinely nice time.

The tippy tapping of Grave’s shoes on the floor makes Hannah laugh now, her excitement clearly bubbling over into more physical actions Hannah could clearly make out, showing her just how happy Grave was in the best way.

“It’s lovely knowing how excited you are.” Hannah states happily as she listens to her younger counterpart tapping on the floor in her happiness, a pure sound to Hannah’s ears, ricocheting only slightly through the room, since it was pretty soundproofed due to all the equipment Grave had managed to fit in there.

“I-I’m… I’m not. I am a normal amount of happy right now. Totally fine. This is business stuff.” Grave tries to justify, only making the situation funnier to Hannah, making her laugh slightly as she jokes in response.

“Mhm, sure hun, cause you normally tap your feet and bite your shirt when you’re just happy.” Hannah raises one of her eyebrows in a questioning gesture, but the blooming grin on her face shows that there’s no bite or rudeness behind the statement at all.

“I’m not doing that!” Grave tries to defend, but Hannah can hear that her feet are still tapping on the floor, though she does hear them stop after some shuffling, meaning Grave has most likely placed one foot over the other to stop the tapping. “Okay, maybe I was-” She admits, making Hannah laugh even more internally as she can hear the defeat in her voice at being caught out by her.

“You definitely were.” Hannah deadpans the statement despite laughing inside. She slowly starts to hear tapping on the floor again as Grave’s feet move on their own, seemingly assigning Grave to her fate.

“…Okay I was.” Grave resigns herself, and Hannah can practically hear her internal sigh as her feet return to tapping, indicating that she was still overall happy and excited, making Hannah smile again.

“Thank you for admitting it.” Hannah teases, her smile twisting to be jokey as she faces Grave, who she can tell is probably pulling a small scowl in response, scrunching up her nose.

“You’re welcome.” Grave says bluntly, putting on an angry voice in an attempt to fool Hannah, though it comes off as more playful than angry, dramatic antics being a sort of second language for Grave.

“Aw, are you trying to be mad at me? That hurts my feelings.” Hannah says in a sad voice pulling a stricken face as she speaks, having years of practice at this from her twin brother and other team-mates.

“I’m sorry!” Grave exclaims, making Hannah feel bad for a second for convincing her she was upset with her.

“I’m just joking hun, you know that.” Hannah reassures, smiling at Grave as she says this, voice soft and gentle as she subconsciously tells Grave not to worry and to calm down.

“It looks very convincing though…” Grave continues, making Hannah smile and raise an eyebrow, sipping her cooled tea as she answers, the smile much more sarcastic.

“That’s because I have a brother.” She explains to Grave. She could make her twin feel bad constantly, and he knew all of her tricks and faces, and yet somehow, she would still pull; him up on it and make him believe her.

“I… good point.” Grave concedes, making Hannah laugh as she listens.

“I know, right.” She laughs, smile wide as she answers the younger teen in front of her. Having a sibling makes you a master of deception, at least, in her case it did.

“Do you want me to make you a suit? It can be customized and stuff.” Grave asks, catching Hannah off guard. She hadn’t thought about Grave asking her this. The suits Hannah wore were designed to help the tiny amount of actual sight she had left, and allow her to see her surroundings using her other senses.

“Much as I would love that, my suits are pretty specially designed to help certain things about me…” Hannah explains vaguely, not wanting to go into the details to Grave, though she fully realised today might be the day she would have to explain her blindness to the younger counterpart.

“I can make the suit like that to help you!” Grave exclaims, further shocking Hannah, making her worried as the truth was coming closer and she wasn’t sure if she wanted to face it again. Being blind didn’t bother her, but the possibility that she would be pitied for it and treated like she couldn’t do anything because of it did.

“It’s um…” Hannah laughs nervously, her words failing her as her brain tries to stop the conversation out of fear. She didn’t know why she was so worried, she was sure Grave wouldn’t care, and yet, there was a small nagging portion of her brain that said otherwise.

“It’s fine if you don’t wanna tell me. You don’t have to.” Grave reassures and Hannah can hear her worried and concerned expression, making her laugh slightly,

“It’s not even that serious I just don’t want any pity from anyone.” Hannah explains as she laughs. Maybe she was downplaying it a little, but to her, it wasn’t serious, it was just her life.

“I mean…” Grave shrugs as she speaks, the fabric of her clothes rustling. “If it makes you feel better, I have a prosthetic arm. I understand the dumb pity you get from people.” Grave explains, making Hannah smile. Though she could never see the arm, she did always know it wasn’t flesh and bone, it sounded too different to her. No normal person would pick up on it, knowing Grave it would be a very elaborate and convincing prosthetic, but Hannah’s blindness actually aided her there.

“Oh I know, I can tell.” Hannah smiles, her voice soft and kind as she speaks, not wanting to come off as rude or sarcastic to Grave.

She can tell Grave is smiling as she hears her prosthetic make some small beeping noises, Grave clearly going it to prove her point about the arm and it was probably a fun thing to do, to be honest.

“That’s always sounded so cool.” Hannah laughs as she listens, smiling as the beeping noises fill her head somehow managing to sound as happy as Grave in their pitch and tone.

“I’m glad you like it!” Grave exclaims, making Hannah smile again with her enthusiasm that was no doubt written all over her face in a goofy smile.

“I really like it, I’ve always loved how creative it sounds.” Hannah elaborates, listening to the arm as it beeps as Grave either fiddles with it or makes it beep to make her smile more, she can’t tell.

“It’s just a song I heard that I wanted to turn into beeps.” Hannah can hear Grave shrug nonchalantly as she speaks, though her voice is still happy.

“That makes a lot of sense actually.” Hannah admits, raising an eyebrow in amusement at Grave’s statement. She was known for doing strange and amazing things, and this was no exception.

Graves tapping on the floor gets louder and Hannah can only assume she’s attempting to quiet her feet down, much to her amusement with the situation.

“You okay there?” Hannah asks in a teasing tone as she listens no doubt to Grave’s growing embarrassment as she tries to stop her feet from tapping on the floor.

“I’m fine, what are you talking about-” Grave asks as she continues to tap, amusing Hannah further as she raises her eyebrows as she speaks.

“You’re tapping hun.” Hannah reminds her cheekily before elaborating. “I can hear it.” She smiles gently as she listens.

Hannah can hear Grave presumably pushing her feet down with her hands to attempt to stop them from tapping as she speaks again, denial in her voice.

“Nope. No I’m not.” She says as Hannah grins at her, so close to bursting into laughter.

“My hearing never fails me, so don’t even lie.” She chastises in a light manner, joking with Grave about the situation.

“That wasn’t me. It was… my arm. I’m not tapping.” Grave lies, making Hannah laugh and be even more sarcastic.

“Mhm, sure hun. If you’re not tapping them I’ve also gone deaf.” She jokes, face like a disappointed mother, though they both knew that was for show and not serious at all.

“Fine…” Hannah can hear Grave pouting and it makes her laugh internally. “I was tapping.” She admits and Hannah has to stop herself from being too annoying, opting for a wide smile as she speaks.

“Thank you! My hearing continues to be my best attribute.” She laughs at the statement, which couldn’t be any more true for her as a person.

“Hhh will my feet ever shut the fuck up-” Grave complains, making Hannah laugh loudly as she tries to stop them from their excited tapping on the floor.

“I don’t know, maybe once you calm down a bit they will stop on their own.” Hannah suggests, shrugging in an unhelpful manner. Even if she wanted to help, she couldn’t see the feet to stop them, though she could probably fathom a pretty good guess of where they were.

“But um, what were you gonna say before I interrupted you?” Grave reminds Hannah as she redirects the conversation. Hannah flounders for a second as she is reminded of the truth she still had to tell the youngest member of the group. She huffs loudly, plastering a smile on her face in an attempt to lighten the news.

“Oh, um, I was gonna say that, and this is super funny. I’m kind of… blind.” Hannah admits as she looks at what is probably Grave in front of her, hoping she would have the response she wants.

“Coolio.” She hears Grave snap her fingers and loses it, laughing as she got the perfect response she was expecting from the youngest member of the ensemble.

“That was the most you response ever-” Hannah says as she laughs, wiping some brimming tears from her eyes as she does. “Just… promise not to make it weird.” Hannah pleads as she stands with Grave in the room.

“I won’t, promise.” Hannah can hear Grave smiling and it makes her smile herself, gentle and warm and full of happiness.

“Thanks.”Hann

#writing with friends #writing #my writing #original writing #sleepisafuckinglie #not my oc #others ocs #original characters #original story #avengers au #alternate universe #House of Hell

[theboyintheleathercoats]

Divas and Dragons

(Continuation of a fanfic I’m writing. Kind of nsfw, but I have some more that aren’t I’ll post. Hope it’s all good!)

Now, now, boys~. This isn’t the time for being worried~. After all, we have all night to play, and I certainly would want to relax after tonight~”

As you and Leviathan would look over, you would be greeted by the sight of Squigly standing in front of the bathroom, the undead singer leaning casually against the doorway with a playful smirk as she observed you and her servant sitting on the bed. She had discarded her dress from earlier, neatly folded on the floor beside her, and she was now wearing a fluffy white robe-although keeping her red-and-white stockings, just to keep her classic style in tact. Her voice had almost immediately stopped your talking, with its luscious velvety whisper, and the teasingly inviting sing-song tone, which you believe she wasn’t even trying to sing, making the effect all the more amazing. Leviathan sat back on the bed, his face a bashful red, in the way a boy would be scolded by his mother sort of blush, offering his mistress a soft, polite smile, as if to apologize to the both of you.  Certainly, Leviathan did live up to the gentleman servant role quite professionally.

My apologies, madam..” Leviathan said, sitting closer to Squigly from where he sat on the bed, taking her hand gingerly and planting an apologizing kiss on the hand, making the singer giggle affectionately at his action. “I just, well, I just am nervous, if I may say. Are we sure we should begin now? When a visitor is present?”

“Oh, I understand your concern, Leviathan.” Squigly smiled warmly, letting a hand gingerly brush through Leviathan’s hair, before rubbing at his chin adoringly. There was a way, you noticed, that when she smiled and spoke so softly and sweetly, it was genuine- not to say everything she did was fake, of course, but she had a way of soothing you, of making you feel okay. Maybe it was the tone of her voice, soft, gentle, non-judging, or the way she embraced one with a hug or a gentle touch with tender hands. Either way she did it, Leviathan- and even you!- seemed quite relaxed now. “There is no reason to be worried, though~. I can assure you, our guest here is good people~. I’ve talked with him plenty of times after my shows, and he seems a nice enough person~. Trust me, Lev, I promise he will be very good~”

Leviathan looked back at you- not in a judging way as before, but rather an observant way, as if he thought he would see you change into some greasy idiot or thug before his eyes, or maybe it was to take a look for himself and see what his mistress said was true. After a bit, he gave a soft smile, nodded and turned to Squigly, resting his hand on top of hers before bowing. “Well…as always, madam, you are correct. I will trust in your judgement. But, understand, if anything is to happen, I will not be afraid to have to, well, defend you as I have done before”

Hearing him say that sent a bit of a jump up your back. Leviathan, from what Squigly said, was a rather skilled fighter, despite his reserved, refined personality, a certain story about him defending her from a group of street thugs once before in a, well, very unrefined fashion came to mind. And with such vivid details in your head, you certainly didn’t want to get on Leviathan’s bad side. As if in response, you shake your head and speak up, sitting up on the bed a bit to look at the two.

“Oh, uh…don’t worry! I promise I won’t be any trouble whatsoever! Don’t worry about a thing!”

As you said this, Squigly nodded in agreement, casting a warm smile at you, a playful twinkle in her ruby red eye. She moved closer to the bed, before suddenly moving back, in one of those exaggerated, humorous ways one would do when they wanted to show off acting, casting a playful smirk at you two as she “fainted” back, before wagging a skeletal finger out towards Leviathan.

“Oh, my~! Leviathan~…” One could detect a noticeable purr in her voice, her smirking lips barely moving as she showed off her impressive skill of casting her alluring voice. “Can you be a dear and help me~? It seems this robe is a little too tight~. Would you please be so kind as to help me~…remove it~?”  

With that, Leviathan’s demeanor changed, as if Squigly’s sly coo seemed to bring him under the same spell she was under. A curious smirk spread out over his face as he eyed at his madam’s figure, all tucked away beneath the fluffy white robe. It didn’t look that tight on her, but it seemed this was part of their little play. The servant stood up, brushing off his clothes before walking back behind Squigly, letting you watch the display by yourself- you would want to help, but you thought it would be rather rude of you to go up when she called for Leviathan, would it? As you adjust yourself on the bed, you watch as Leviathan leaned over to gently kiss at Squigly’s cheek, moving his head up and down the singer’s cheek to her neck in very soft kisses, with soft coos escaping Squigly’s lips as she spoke. His hands moved down to brush along the robe, teasingly rubbing at the soft fabric before gently grasping at the belt, slowly slipping it loose before, with just enough light pulls, the white cover fell off, landing at a heap on Squigly’s stockings below.

And what was beneath, well, was nothing short of amazing.

Two red bands, as thin as ribbon bows you’d find on Christmas gifts, slipped across Squigly’s form, the only pieces of clothing that covered her mostly nude form- although they were just enough to barely cover her most intriguing assets. The bands started at a loose knot around Squigly’s covered neck, parting around to split into a V-shape, covering each of her breasts- they weren’t as big as the ones you’d find on those tacky models, but they were still rather impressive, having a noticeable bounce to them as the robe slipped off, jiggling teasingly against the bands pressed down on them. The bands crossed her stomach, showcasing her own impressive curves, showing how they narrowed and curved down from her chest to form a beautiful hourglass shape, widening at around her hips in a full, round figure. She wasn’t skinny, but she wasn’t very large either, in fact, you could say she was downright perfect, with just enough plush to give her a nice rounded appearance. You also noticed that there was a little shine to her blue body, as if she had applied a thin layer of oil on herself to give her a noticeable luster as she would present herself. The bands then slipped between her wide hips, covering where her slit would be before vanishing up around her back, which was pressed teasingly against Leviathan. The way her hips seemed to be so full and round, you could tell there was some nice cushioning of sorts behind her, pressed gently against Leviathan. Under the sheer curves, the bands seemed to be hugging her, drawing your attention up and down the bands to witness every alluring detail of the singer’s form

Her hips did a little sway to bounce the robe off, letting you and Leviathan take a rather full account of her body. She did look very beautiful really, despite her undead state, you could say that such a “condition” did nothing to deter her natural beauty from herself.  Her wide-bottomed hips continued to slowly rock and sway, a unique feature being her body didn’t move, as if she was making herself sway at just the mercy of the air alone, her long, slender legs tucked into their stockings still firm on the ground.

As if noticing the look on your and Leviathan’s faces, which were both locked in an expression of amazed surprise- and a bit of bashful excitement- Squigly let out a noticeably smooth giggle, her voice spilling from her lips like sweet wine, her eyes fluttering teasingly as she gazed over both her servant and guest, as if glad to see such a reaction. Her arms wrapped around her to curl around Leviathan, displaying her full front to you, pursing her lips playfully as she looked down at you.

“Mhm, do you like what you see, my dear~?” She crooned, her voice practically flowing into your ears like water, her tone a mixture of bubbly excitement and refined prestige, letting her natural singing tone carry her own sultry coo, giving it a more alluring sound. She gave her hips another shake, giggling as she watched one of the bands slip a bit, making her breast jiggle and slip a bit out by just a bit, before she reached out to fix it. “I can tell you do~. And Leviathan as well~. I thought you two would enjoy this little thing~. I picked it out this summer when I was with Leviathan shopping for summer wear, I thought it was a novelty thing, but I found it certainly was comfortable~.”

All that came from your lips was a soft gasp of amazement, and a small stutter, as if you were trying to find the words to properly describe what you were seeing. Leviathan’s face, just as red, and his voice just as bashful but still very impressed, matched your own, the servant’s hands resting gingerly on his mistress’s body, slowly moving them along her hips to her waist in slow gentle circles, making Squigly relax deeper against him. Leviathan let out a chuckle, nibbling gently on Squigly’s ear as he held her, his voice dripping with an excited, refined echo, just as Squigly’s tone cascaded with sultry properness, both singer and servant displaying their refined, high-class roots even now.

“Well, well, my dear Squigly~. I must say, you look simply ravishing~. I had forgotten about this little outfit you bought to be honest, but just seeing it again…mhm, it certainly does do its part to display your blinding radiance~. Of course, no piece of clothing could ever compare to your natural beauty, my darling~. I could find myself enthralled simply by you alone~.”

“Ooh, thank you, my sweet Leviathan~. It means the world to hear you say such things~. It makes me feel so lucky to have such a noble gentleman like you~. And such a handsome one as well~. I do so enjoy these little sessions we share, do you not~? And I have a feeling that tonight~…”

Squigly’s eyes looked to you- a warm, mesmerizing shimmer in her eye, oh how you just couldn’t stop listening to her voice, how silky it was, how smooth it was, how it wrapped around you like a warm blanket that you didn’t want to leave. Her lips curled into a playful, teasing smile, combining an adoration and tender smile with that of an inviting, eager smirk, her stitches only making her smile even more amazing and rather tempting. Her own cheeks were lit by a red blush, purple on her smooth blue skin, her face half hidden with a beautiful veil of her blue bangs sweeping from her face.

“Will be one that we certainly will not forget~” ........................................................................

You watched as Squigly slipped off your lap, gracefully, as if even now she was displaying how skillfully she could move as she teased you. As her soft thighs slipped off from both sides of your throbbing length, you shivered softly, already missing the exotic warmth she gave you- to the point you almost let your hands pull her back down for a few more moments, but seeing how rude that would be, you stood still, letting the alluring songstress stand before you. Your eyes looked over her curves shyly, albeit with a bit more boldness, taking in her wide hips and soft breasts sway almost temptingly for you to come closer.

Squigly, always so observant, noticed your face, all red and shy, and gave a cute giggle, letting her skeletal hand move to caress your cheek tenderly, her thumb circling around your cheek before she leaned down to press those soft warm lips to your other cheek, her voice whispering into your ear, melting like heavenly satin as her words serenaded you, under the spell of an adoring songstress.

“Mhm~…don’t worry, my dear~. I’m not going to leave you~. Just relax, okay~? I have something special in mind for you~”

Then, with the grace of a lounge singer on stage, the singer moved to nuzzle herself against Leviathan, resting herself against his nude form seductively, letting his lips move to kiss his neck gently while her hands move to glide up and down along his form. Leviathan blushed and chuckled, his arms moving to wrap around the singer’s perfect form to hold her close, returning her kisses across her cheeks and lips in between a flurry of coos and moans. It was as if the two were teasing you, putting on a private performance for you just inches away. You felt so mesmerized, so excited that you didn’t move from the bed, just watching every sway of Squigly’s hips and every motion of Leviathan’s hands, as if afraid to miss any moment.

A moment later, you watched as Squigly moved to whisper something to Leviathan’s ear, her voice barely audible besides a symphony of coos and giggles. Whatever she said made Leviathan blush even brighter, and his eyes went wide, not with anger but with surprise. He seemed to say something, but rather whispered to Squigly again, his hands still moving along her figure under her spell. What they said you didn’t make out, but they continued to whisper and blush brightly, at one point, Squigly pointed to you and nodded, before she and Leviathan gave each other a tender kiss, and looked at you, their eyes full of curiosity and interest, with Lev’s eyes looking almost bashful, contrast to his stoic, calm nature. “

Anon…~?” Squigly’s velvety voice cooed out, her fingers wagging to you, as if to invite you over. “Anon, would you like to…try something~?” Without hesitation you move closer to the duo on the bed, your length throbbing and pulsing wildly with excitement, pre-cum already beading down the tip. You would normally feel shy about this, but the way she spoke, and the way her and Leviathan looked, it seemed that they didn’t want you to feel nervous. You nod your head in curiosity, wondering what she could be referring to.

“Uh, sure, Squigly. What do you want to do?”

Squigly clapped her hands together and giggled, her and Leviathan blushing brighter now, as if getting close to answering the question. The two moved closer to you, until Squigly moved to lay on one side while Leviathan stayed on the other. “

Well, anon, I have a question~…? Do you want to play with my big rear~? Be honest now~. I simply can’t stand liars~”

The question made you blush brighter, your lips stammering as you heard her coo into your ear. You didn’t know how to respond- was this a trick question, to test your honor? If you answered yes, Leviathan could get upset and toss you out, Squigly would think you a perv. But, in honesty, you really did- not to sound rude to her, of course. Even now, seeing her own hand move teasingly up and down the big, plush mounds of her rear seemed spellbinding- how her fingers sank into the soft cheek with just a touch, the way they jiggled off each other with even the slightest sway, moving in a seductive rhythm that seemed almost practiced. Even the way the light shimmered off them, so smooth and round, made them look quite tempting, as if begging you to come and just run your hand along them. You knew you couldn’t lie to her, not to Squigly- the way her eyes fluttered at you, the way her voice cooed to you, even how her body cuddled to yours in a warm hug that made you feel so relaxed- with a deep breath, you looked to her and nodded.

“Y…yes…I do want to, Squigly. I know it sounds real perverted, but I want to play with you some more…”

A sweet giggle came from those lips, and once more you felt them press to your cheek in an adoring soothing manner, her voice like sweet wine whispering into your ear, as if the words licked at your ear before pouring into it like the first few notes of a lounge song.

“Oh, Anon~! I’m not mad~! In fact, I’m quite flattered~. To have such two handsome boys admiring me, wanting to lavish me~…it makes a woman feel quite proud~!” She giggled again, before sitting up, letting you fully eye her luscious rear, swaying and swaying…

“I’d be happy to let you play with it, Anon~…in fact, I could perhaps let you nuzzle that cute little face of yours against my big wide rear~…if you’d like to do something for me first~”

You nod, noticing Leviathan blush brightly beside you, sitting closer, as if eager to hear the answer. “

Sure, Squigly~…I’d be happy to do whatever you want” “

Splendid~!” The songstress clapped her hands together and cooed with delight, that voice of yours only drawing you in more. In your eager mind, you are in her arms, her warm adoring arms around you, holding her beautiful figure close as your hands explore her form so bravely, so tenderly, as her dulcet tones serenaded you with a song full of pleasure and warmth- the idea alone making your cock throb even more, even dribbling some pre-cum out onto your full orbs below. “Leviathan, would you like to tell him what I had in mind~?”

Leviathan nodded slowly and turned to you, not mad, but rather nervous, as if wondering if you would agree to the idea as well. You notice his own length, hard and throbbing as well, just inches from brushing your leg. His hand rests gently on your leg, giving it a firm squeeze as if to release anxiety. Then, he speaks to you, blushing like a schoolboy would do when asked a question.

“Well, uhm, you see, Anon~…the mistress has requested that you, uh, play around with me, sort to speak. She would pleasure you, while you would, heh, pleasure me~. I…I know the idea may sound strange…and apologies if it concerns you!”

“Yes, anon! Please, don’t feel forced into this!” Squigly dropped her playful smirk, looking at you with honest care and concern, as if not wanting you to think she was being rude to force you into something you weren’t ready for. “If you want, we can skip over it! I don’t want to be rude and make you if you aren’t willing!”

For a moment, you think- the idea of having fun with Leviathan was a bit surprising, yes- after all you were both of the same gender, and despite being half dragon, Lev indeed did have all the needed…parts to be considered a male. You never thought of doing anything like that before, but you did note how eager Leviathan was earlier as you played with Squigly, coaching you to better pleasure his host, from telling you how to kiss her neck or how to better massage her in the sensitive spots. He really did care for Squigly, so it wasn’t as if it was some random stranger. He also seemed to care for you too, in a way, when you and Squigly spend the time talking after her shows in the backstage, he seemed cold at first, but after a few nights became more lively to you, talking to you and referring to you as “sir”, even laughing at your jokes here and there-despite not admitting it personally. Besides, if you didn’t feel right doing it, they would understand if you didn’t want to, right? So, looking at them both with a warm sheepish smile, you nod.

“Well…I…I wouldn’t mind trying it out…after all, Lev seems like a good guy..and I don’t want to be rude and refuse such a lovely host~” You say, your bashfulness pouring out into a bit of charm that surprised even you.

Squigly and Leviathan both looked in surprise, Squigly’s smirk returning with a surprised teasing giggle while Leviathan’s face went a deep red, a bashful chuckle escaping his lips as he looked at you two, ready to begin whenever you were.

“Oh! Well, then~…!” Squigly turned around to face you again, kneeling down in front of your trembling shaft with a sweet smile, fluttering her eyes cutely as she cooed out in her rich melody. As she did that, Leviathan stood up beside you, letting you observe his package fully now. “Shall we begin~?”

Then, suddenly, you have a moan escape your lips, the sudden feeling of the singer’s gentle hands glide over your sensitive sack- delicately dancing with just the very tips of her fingers. Despite what you would think, her hands weren’t cold, but rather warm, tender, carrying even now that magic touch that made you melt into her in a puddle of bashful shyness, and also sensual delight. Your cock throbs even more at that touch, some more pre-cum oozing down from the tip to slicken the quivering shaft, while your orbs seemed to just melt into her palms, rolling around under her graceful fingers as if she was weighing them, measuring at how full your load would be. You could see her smirking up at you, her red eye captivating like a gemstone, her lips curled into that seductive smirk that seemed to radiate with its dark blue lipstick and regal charm, and...the way her big, luscious ass seemed to sway in the air behind her, just swaying and jiggling with even slight bump of her hips, the cheeks so round and full, as if begging you to reach out and cup them so lovingly, the way her hourglass figure seemed even more alluring as she laid carefree before you, unspoiled by her undead state, something out of a beautiful dream. Squigly knew how to tease you, and so far, she and Leviathan were being quite the wonderful hosts, and you wanted to find someway to repay them for their kindness, so whatever they wished to do, you simply were their guest, eager to join the festivities.

Beside you, you look over, noticing Leviathan propped up just an inch away from you. The tall parasite-human seemed to be quite excited- both in that curious, eager way to try his mistress’s idea, and nervous as if unsure how it would work. His yellow eyes gazed down at you, surprisingly not mad but rather calming, in the way of asking you to just relax and go with the flow, even offering you a warm small smile and a bashful chuckle to break the quiet between you. You had never seen him like this- usually he was stoic and reserved, sure you’ve seen him laugh and chuckle at jokes, or engage in wit and debate with Squigly, another performer at the jazz lounge, or even you when the question was right- but to see him like this, his nude form beside you, his face all red and shy, you had to admit it was quite surprising. Leviathan’s hand moved to gingerly cup his package, holding it bashfully as if wanting to hide it, but knowing you had already seen it anyway, so his hand would move a bit, letting you observe it.

“So, well, uh…” Leviathan’s suave voice broke into a shy chuckle once more, his smile getting a tad wider, his cheeks red and shining- much to Squigly’s delight, who only offered a sweet little giggle that only made the servant blush more. “How should we begin this, Anon? Do…do you have any ideas? Is my..ahem.. as they say, package good enough?” You look over to the parasite human’s package beside you, taking it into proper glance this time. Leviathan’s cock was long, not too long, but rather just a nice full 6-7 inches, perhaps? It looked smooth, from the rather round tip to the full base, where it rounded out to a nice, filling girth- not too big, but not too small, noting it had a nice throb to it, even quite eager from all the excitement before or maybe even out of the curiosity of the fun you and him were about to experiment. The tip itself dripped small beads of purple pre-cum, some landing on your hip with each steady pulse, a warm thick fluid that seemed to shimmer like the kind of flame Leviathan could make from his fingers-he was part dragon, after all. Your eyes look over the shaft curiously, following it along every curve and smooth inch, before taking notice of his own balls. They seemed round and full, sagging noticeably between his rather shapely legs, pronounced with a slight sway from where he stood, making them sway almost teasingly like a pendulum. All in all, you had to admit, Leviathan did have quite the nice set of assets, it was no wonder Squigly enjoyed their fun with him-at least, one of the reasons of course. Glancing up at the servant, you give Leviathan a warm, sheepish smile between your coos from Squigly’s own teasing.

“Oh, it...it looks really impressive! Heh, a long thick cock, a nice full pair of balls~…you certainly do look impressive. No wonder Squigly enjoys your company…at least…I mean…” You stammer, hoping that you didn’t anger Leviathan by insulting him- wondering if Squigly would be mad as well, and the two of you would throw you out of their home in a huff, so you prepared for the worst.

Then, you heard Squigly giggle again, seeing her smile encouragingly at you as she rubbed along your drooling shaft, even giving a sly wink to show that you were doing good. Leviathan gave a bashful chuckle, his face going even redder and his smile getting not angry, but rather flustered and excited from the compliment, as if to thank you silently but politely for it. Slowly, out of your own curiosity as well, you move your hand slowly to Leviathan’s cock, letting the tips of your fingers shyly brush the throbbing smooth shaft, before letting your hand gingerly wrap around it fully, feeling it throb in your palm from the sensation. As you did so, you began to move your hand very slowly up and down the rod, going from the tip to the base in slow, curious strokes, before you heard a coo and a gasp from Leviathan, making you look up to him. He looked down to you, his eyes wide, his face redder than ever, but his smile still there, noticeably a bit bigger and a bit more relaxed it seemed.

“Oh! Oh, no, don’t stop Anon!’ He said reassuringly, his words having a tint of pleasure behind them, something you picked up from hearing Squigly whisper into your ear. “That..that actually felt really wonderful~. Your hands, if you pardon me saying, they feel rather warm and soft, like my mistress’s~…please, do that again, a bit faster, heh~…”

[flakandforay]

Love Yourself 轉 Tear Analysis

this is the overview of bangtan’s 3rd full album: LY 轉 Tear.

disclaimer: this is just my personal opinion, feel free to disagree. do let me know your thoughts in my ask box

overall: this album has been anticipated by many especially since it was meant to be a continuation of the Love Yourself series that bangtan has been promoting in late 2017!

Though bighit has actually released the Love Yourself Wonder: Euphoria film that they had mentioned in several news articles, they released the next instalment of the Love Yourself series with Love Yourself: Tear. Not to mention how Namjoon literally took part in the producing of all the tracks with Yoongi and Hoseok taking part in 8 of them and our Golden Maknae with one song!!!!

One would know this based on the hints of their 2017 year-end shows. And so, here it is.

intro: singularity: okay, so I actually already gussed that this intro would be done by Taehyung based on their DNA positions towards the end of the brdige ( in this theory ). Since Jimin was revealed followed by Jungkook, next would be Taehyung and the next one would be Seokjin.

This intro is definitely me favourite one out of all the intros so far. I really liked the overall vibe of the song. The soft, slow burn jazz is what I live for. Based on my Singularity analysis, I already mentioned how this song is something that I would prolly listen in some café, sipping some coffee and snapping my fingers as some form of poetry is being recited. ( call me cliché, but I believe this song just encompas this whole vibe )

I really believed Taehyung outdid himself with this intro, although it is slightly longer than the previous intros of bangtab, one must consider that this intro is actually much more slower than the rest in terms of the beats per minute and how there is a lot of space in between.

Truly a song that showcases Taehyung’s vocals, skills and even his dancing skills as seen in the MV ( also, aesthetics anyone?????? ) I am so proud of Taehyung right here.

fake love: To be honest, I must say that this title of the song already gives off a real miserable vibe about it. The title of it wasn’t actually released until it was stated in an article prior to the comeback.

The boys have mentioned to us before how excited and believe that this title track would hit it off and in fact it did!! It actually earned 35 PAK ( Perfect All Kill  ) before they even step foot in Korea since their comeback dropped.

I really love how the vibe of it is just oozing with BST; the whole sensual and intimate side of it coupled with the sadness of the HYYH series. Truly remarkable. A must-listen song.

It definitely showcased more of Seokjin’s underrated vocals together with the new styles of raps that the boys have been trying out especially Hoseok. Particularly, I enjoyed his rap the most. The choreography here is another plus point that has my eyes being so satisfied at the visuals and everything???

Bangtan, has truly outdid themselves this time round with this title track.

전하지 못한 진심 (Feat Steve Aoki):  another wonderful surprise by bangtan by gifting us with another vocal line song!! ( honestly, we are so spoiled because aside from the cyphers, bangtan still delivers vocal line songs!! )

so, while listening throughout the song, I have a feeling Steve Aoki prollu produced thi whole song or co-produced but im not too sure. Honestly, I loved the underlying beat of this whole song, one could consider it similar to a ballad especially from the intro itself with the piano and the soulful voice of Taehyung.

But one could also listen to this as a type of slow burn song as well especially with the lyrics ‘ but I still want you’. With the title itself being translated to ‘The sincerity that I couldn’t show before’; kinda reminded me of the Smeraldo flower which also means ‘The truth that couldn’t be told’.

I love how throughout this song, though there is a nice steady increase in the beats and percussion, it is still a rather slow burn, never actually exceeding the ‘peak’.

134340: im pretty sure this song is much like modern jazz, yet the synths kinda remind me a bit of 이사. But this could easily be altered to Michael Buble if you know what I mean.

Even tha rap done by the rapline especially Namjoon is more towards the laidback one. Also, I really love how there is the use of flutes rifght here which becomes the underlying beat. I loved how there is the use of a female voice that gives the conversation kind of feel in the song.

Also, the way that Seokjin does the bridge sounds a bit like the 80s kind of singing. Truly, it is much like a throwback but in a modern way?

낙원: the title of the song translates to ‘Paradise’. But moving on, I am still learning to grasp onto this song but maybe over some time, it might grow on me.

The synths here are pretty modern actually but the transition from Yoongi to Hoseok is truly one of the key features in this song and the doubling done by the vocal line that gives a much more fuller sound.

love maze: the instrumentals here sounds very traditional until the synths and percussions come in, giving it the modern spin off to something possibly like R&B.

magic shop: out of this whole album, this is one of my fav songs in the entire album actually. To think that Jungkook took part in the prioducing of this song and how that this is their 2ndfan song after 둘!셋! during the Wings era says something!!!

I really love at how calm this song is. The synths are the driving force of this whole song but im so thankful that it doesn’t override the voals of the group especially in the prechorus and chorus as this is where the highlight lies, within the lyrics of it.

Im surprised that the drop of the chorus isn’t so hard but yet it is deemed appropriate and the phrase ‘So show me” “I show you’ just striked a chord within me. I can just imagine the armys just singing along to bangtan truly.

airplane pt.2: honestly, just listening to the intro itself gives me the feel of some Carribean ballroom dancing song specifically th Cha Cha, that’s just how it is. One could easily tell how big the influence of South American music is inside here as well. I mean, you could literally dance to the Cha Cha with this song???

I was actually wondering how is this Airplane pt.2 until I heard Hoseok’s verse. I love how they kinda made a part 2 of Hoseok’s song Airplane and continued from Hoseok’s lyrics to say that now the boys are travelling around the world.

anpanman: this is the kind of song that has the same kind of vibe such as 21stCentury Girls, 고민보다고(GoGo). So, one could easily call this a trilogy to be hoenst. The same fun vibe mixed with a lot of aegyo and audience participation in a way that the dance would most likely involve making some signs or actions towards the audience and capture their hearts etc ( then again, when does bangtan never capture the hearts of their audience?? )

I was actually skeptical to how this is, especially with the title since some speculated that it could possibly be the Jaoanese cartoon superhero but it could also be the name of an asteroid considering the relations with 134340.

so what: this is a song that could be under the same category as Wings: Interlude and the full version of the Wings song, something similar to the kind of 80s disco feel.

outro: tear: let me start off by saying at how pumped I was to actually hear the melodic instrumentals from the 3rdHighlight Reel, specifically (Tear). it is the instrumentals that would increase in terms of volume, speed and percussion that gives off an ominous feeling; and based off the 3rdHighlight Reel, this is where, everything starts to collapse. ( on a side note, I really loved all of the instrumentals from the highlight reel ( I actually enjoyed it by themselves, it’s one whole story itself and it is great )

But I love the twist in which, instead of some kind of slow burn rap down by the rap line, this outro could be considered to be one of the hard songs despite the instrumentals at the beginning. This could easily be one of the songs from Dark and Wild and I wouldn’t even tell the difference except that maybe the rapping styles of the Yoongi and Hoseok have changed slightly. This is especially with Yoongi’s more melodic lines but the breakdown of the underlying beats is easily one of the cypher ones.

The rapline has done it again.

last thoughts: although this album was meant to have more darker themes, I actually expected something like dark and wild in which almost 60% of the songs were just heavily influenced by the heavy angst and rebellious teens so this time round, I was expecting some heavy angst from a recent heartbroken person. Also, they mentioned how this was meant to have some semblamce of rock but only the music structure is of rock but the song itself doesn’t sound like rock.

But regardless, another quality album of bangtan especially with how they mixed their various styles from their earlier albums. One could tell how much they have grown with this album and I could never feel as proud.

[Photo Source] Bighit Entertainment  Credits: maxine ☕️ DO NOT REPOST ©

#personal #bangtanbudsnet #btsprotectnet #fafanalysis #fafanalyses #fafanalyse #bangtan #bts #love yourself #seokjin #jin #yoongi #suga #hoseok #hobi #jhope #namjoon #rm #rapmonster #jimin #chimchim #mochi #jungkook #kookie #nochu #love yourself 轉 tear #overview #love yourself 轉 #tear

[mediaeval-muse]

Video Game Review: Assassin’s Creed Liberation (Ubisoft, 2012; Remastered 2019)

Genres: action-adventure, third person, open world

Premise: Abstergo Entertainment (a divistion of Absergo Industries from the previous games) releases a video game called “Liberation,” in which players can experience the life of Assassin Aveline de Grandpré. In the story of the game, Aveline must track down Templar agents, including the mysterious “Company Man,” in Louisiana during the 18th century.

Platform Played On: PC (Windows)

Rating: 3/5 stars

***Full review under the cut.***

I am evaluating this game based on four key aspects: story, characters, gameplay, and visuals. I will be evaluating the remastered version of this game on its own terms, so I cannot speak to how it is different from the initial release.

Content Warnings: violence, blood, slavery, racism

Story: Assassin’s Creed Liberation follows Aveline de Grandpré, a mixed-race woman who is recruited to the Assassins and works to rid New Orleans of Templar influence during the end of the French and Indian War. Aveline is trying to uncover the identity of the “Company Man” - a mysterious figure who oversees the Templar takeover of Louisiana - while freeing slaves and racing against Spanish officials to secure parts of the “Prophecy Disk” (artifacts of the First Civilization). She must also contend with threats to her mentor’s life, while also seeking out what happened to her mother, who disappeared when Aveline was young.

Liberation’s plot suffers in part from the lack of a strong introduction to get players emotionally invested in the stakes. While players do play through a scene in which Aveline is separated from her mother, the game doesn’t quite set up the Templar-Assassin conflict as something that Aveline has personal stakes in. I also personally think the Company Man could have been introduced earlier - the main baddie isn’t mentioned until a few missions into the game, and I think mentioning them sooner could have helped me see the significance of each mission. Doing so might correct for the plot’s main flaw, which is the lack of suspense. Because players can easily pick up or put down the main narrative, there’s no real excitement to move on to the next objective, and I often felt like I was drifting aimlessly without motivation to see what would happen next in Aveline’s story.

I also would have liked to see more history woven into the story. Arguably, the French and Indian War/Spanish occupation of Louisiana is not as well-known to American players as the American Revolution, so I think this game could have taken the opportunity to really showcase some of the major events from the time period. Especially since the game features so many Black characters, I think their voices and stories could have been showcased more.

That being said, I don’t think the game handled elements of slavery and race very well. I was glad that there weren’t gratuitous scenes of torture, nor were there racial slurs or other hateful comments being thrown around. Those things were good, but I do think that slavery was treated as something of a background element. Aveline does several missions where she frees slaves, and she even goes to several sites where slaves are working, but freedom isn’t treated with as much urgency as I would have liked. Because Aveline is half-Black, I would have liked to see her get more involved with abolitionist actions. Moreover, there were references to voodoo which I don’t think were handled with care. I can’t speak for those who actually practice or study voodoo, but at times, it felt less like a living practice and more an element to make the story feel spooky.

The most interesting part of the plot for me was when the Prophecy Disks became a focus. I liked the way the race to uncover these disks created a goal and direct tension with the Templars, and Aveline’s mentor’s reaction to these disks created some suspense (as well as conflict). It was also the part of the plot that made the game feel connected to the others in the Assassin’s Creed franchise - it’s hard to have an Assassin’s Creed game without a reference to the First Civilization, I think.

Characters: Aveline is Assassin’s Creed’s first playable female character, and she’s a badass. I really liked that she wasn’t written as a “tragic mulatto” figure (a common trope in literature about mixed race people) and she could navigate her world with some ease. I also liked that she was treated with respect, not just as a competent assassin, but also as a businesswoman. It was somewhat refreshing to play as her without being bombarded by sexist or racist abuse in the name of “historical accuracy” (there were some comments about her not being able to inherit things because of her race, but these were made delicately, in my opinion). My only criticism is that I wish more had been done with the plot to show her emotional journey, from finding her mother to uncovering the identity of the Company Man.

Aveline is frequently assisted by her mentor (Agaté) and her friend (Gérald). Agaté is constantly criticizing Aveline, demanding loyalty while rebuking her for disobeying his orders. I would have preferred to see more tenderness between the two, especially since Aveline doesn’t have many deep, personal relationships with other Black characters in the game (save her mother). Gérald is a bit more likable; he’s soft-spoken and is concerned for Aveline without being possessive or protective, and I liked that he deferred to her judgment on everything from assassin-ing to business. I didn’t quite like that Ubisoft tried to manufacture a romance between the two; their friendship was much more compelling, and their awkward chemistry was less cute and more forced.

Other supporting characters ranged in terms of compelling characterization. Many of the villains were fairly flat with no interesting mannerisms or traits to set them apart from any other antagonist. The smugglers were a bit more likable, but that’s probably because they were somewhat entertaining to interact with, cracking jokes and sharing liquor in between missions. I did initially like Aveline’s stepmother and the positive relationship she seemed to have with her step-daughter (of course, the big plot twist complicates that), and I did appreciate Aveline’s father’s tenderness towards his daughter (though he’s portrayed sympathetically despite having impregnated a slave - yes, yes, he says he loved Aveline’s mother and freed her, but in the end, there was an imbalance of power there). Overall, though, very few of these characters were memorable.

Gameplay: Much of the gameplay from Liberation is similar to that of Assassin’s Creed III. Players can control Aveline’s notoriety, purchase tailor and weapons shops from rivals, and parkour/free run/stealth just like Connor. Aveline can also pickpocket, incite riots, and travel by canoe, which isn’t wholly different from the game’s predecessor. In that sense, not much was done to tailor gameplay to the new setting, but it was admittedly nice to have some familiar elements so that I could pick up the game quickly.

One of the major differences, however, was the concept of “personas.” In addition to tailor and weapons shops, Aveline can purchase “dressing chambers,” which allows her to adopt one of three disguises: assassin, lady, or slave. Each “persona” has its own advantages and disadvantages; the lady, for example, is slow to accumulate notoriety, but can’t free run or climb. Each persona also has a unique set of side quests that can only be completed if Aveline is in that persona, which presented some interesting challenges. I liked that the personas allowed for some flexibility in strategy when exploring the open world, though I’m not sure “slave persona” is entirely appropriate; that Aveline could put on/take off the status of “slave” points to a kind of privilege, and I’m not convinced that treating “slave” as a “costume” is appropriate.

In terms of weapons, I liked that Aveline had options that reflected her setting. Instead of daggers, she could purchase things like machetes or hatchets, and rather than a bow and arrow, her (non-firearm) ranged weapon is a blowgun. She also could use a whip to pull enemies towards her before striking them down, which was admittedly quite fun to do. Aveline could also use her weapons to “chain kill,” which is a separate move from combo kills, and the one time I managed to activate it was pretty cool, though I never figured out how to do it again.

In order to purchase these weapons, Aveline had to raise money through trade. Similar to Connor’s homesteading, Aveline can purchase goods and then put them on a ship to sell elsewhere for a profit. There is no crafting, so trading is simplified compared to Assassin’s Creed III, but there are enough elements (such as ship size and speed, market values, etc.) for players to be challenged by the trade system. The main drawback, in my opinion, is that many of the goods available for trade are those which have been historically produced by slave labor. Although Aveline doesn’t run a plantation, I couldn’t help but feel like I was vicariously participating in colonialism and oppression when I sent shiploads of cotton or tobacco from New Orleans to the West Indies.

Collectibles such as alligator eggs, brooches, foreign currency, pocket watches, and the like were scattered throughout the world, but in my opinion, they didn’t yield satisfying rewards. In order to gain some of them, you had to be in a specific “persona,” or else be in a location like the bayou where navigating difficult terrain is a pain. I didn’t have much incentive to go after them, especially since they weren’t always visible on a map, and you can’t purchase “treasure maps” to reveal their locations. As a result, when I found something, I was frequently in the wrong persona or I was busy doing a mission and couldn’t mark it on my map for later. Even more annoying was that there was no fast travel, so trying to find a dressing chamber to change and then running back to the collectible’s location was tedious.

Overall, Liberation had a lot less going on than Assassin’s Creed III, which is probably because it was originally intended for PlayStation Vita. Because I played on a PC, I can’t speak to how the feeling of the gameplay changes for a touchscreen system, but if you’re playing on something more traditional, you may find the open world a bit annoying and the rewards a bit disappointing.

Visuals: While I wasn’t as blown away by Liberation’s visuals as I was by Assassin’s Creed III, I did enjoy the scenes of the bayou and the architecture of New Orleans. I particularly enjoyed the fireflies and glowing moths/butterflies, as they created a peaceful atmosphere in the swamps of Louisiana. Most impressive, however, was the sheer range of skin tones of NPCs in the various environments. I loved seeing people of all races spread across all classes - Black people weren’t confined to being slaves, which was great to see.

I also liked Aveline’s assassin costume, though it didn’t have the characteristic white color like all the previous assassins’ (though you could dye them white at the tailor’s shop). I appreciated that players could see her hair in braids, and that there were small details that nodded towards her origins (like something that looks like either bone or alligator teeth). Her lady and slave persona outfits were also very visually appealing, despite my misgivings about the morality/ethics of treating “slave” as a “persona.”

The main drawback of this game was the lack of fluid animation. A lot of character animations would feel stiff, reminding me of my experience playing Revelations. While I liked how Aveline moved, she also didn’t have as many appealing finishing moves, and the cut scenes themselves felt somewhat robotic. There were some awkward camera angles, but because the game was much simpler compared to its predecessors, I didn’t find that they hindered my progress all that much.

Final Verdict: Although Assassin’s Creed Liberation features a Black female protagonist and renders some truly stunning environments, the lack of a strong story and the simplicity of its gameplay makes it an average-quality installment in the Assassin’s Creed franchise.

#video game review

[aesjae]

Boyfriend! Ten

#2 of Boyfriend! Series

Taeil | Johnny | Taeyong | Yuta | Kun | Doyoung | Ten | Jaehyun | WinWin | Jungwoo | Lucas | Mark | Xiao Jun | Hendery | Renjun | Jeno | Haechan | Jaemin | Yang Yang | Chen Le | Jisung

Word Count: 1,154 Style/ Genre: Headcanon/- Date posted: 19/08/17

omg my bias

i'm probably going to make this extremely cute and kill myself in the process

hehe

so ten as a boyfriend

would be really adorable

it's the kind which you always fantasise about, those you always see in dramas

those that give you butterflies in your stomach at the thought of it

at the start of the relationship, he would be a really sweet and shy boyfriend

even though ten is usually seen as a self-confident and cheery guy

i would actually see him being really conscientious around the person he likes

every time he sees you, he would have this blush upon his cheeks

not those furious red blushes, but red enough for people around him to tease him about

he would have a lot of formulation in his mind on how to be smooth af with you

but in reality, he would be too shy to actually carry them out

constantly over thinking that he may make a fool out of himself

he might be really hesitant to hold your hand, and would fiddle with his fingers nervously

but when he turns to his side to look at your side profile,

and just to realise how you weren’t perfect, but how you were perfect for him,

his heart would overwhelm with bursting emotions

and he would have this sudden surge of courage and confidence

swooping down to interlock your fingers with his, as his warm palm was pressed against yours

and you can literally feel the electricity flowing through your veins

it was one touch, but it made your day a whole much better

ten would be a very careful boyfriend, planning his next actions meticulously

if your birthday was coming up,

he would plan a really nice birthday party for you

inviting your family, friends, and of course the nct members, who you are also close to

it would not be a very grand celebration, but it would definitely be one that's lively enough to excite you

but then the next day, he would have a special private birthday celebration planned for you too

just for the two of you

it wouldn't be something really extravagant, neither would it be extremely romantic or cheesy and or, but enough to touch your heart

to make you realise how thankful you are to have such a splendid boyfriend

ten may seem like one that is able to speak very well, but he also likes to express his feelings through actions

he might write you a letter for your birthday, fully expressing his raw love for you, saying words that he had never been able to properly express verbally because he's too shy

and he would give you a beautiful necklace with a key pendant with several diamonds on it,

and at the back of the key, you would see your name and your birthday engraved on it

ten may let out an embarrassed giggle, looking up at you sheepishly, commenting how you had the 'key to his heart', and that only you could unlock his heart for him to reveal his whole bare self to you

you knew then that you couldn’t love someone else more than you loved ten

ten was the one for you

and ten felt the same towards you

he wouldn’t want to exchange you for anybody else 

you were the best coincidence that occurred in his life

ten would also be a very encouraging boyfriend

whenever you were feeling low, he would make sure to do everything to make you feel better

as the relationship matures, ten would start to open up to you even more

he would also continue being the lively and positive bean he is

he may buy you your favourite flowers and snacks

to appear at your doorstep in the evening

ready to snuggle on the couch with you

watching movies

maybe disney

which ten may squeal during the parts when the prince and princess finally fall in love

and cry when the villain decides to intercept

maybe horror

when ten would assure you that everything is purely fiction and attempts to protect you

but he ends screaming louder than you

he may have occasional deep talks with you too

even though ten has more of an extraverted personality,

i feel that he may have a more introverted mindset and have deep thoughts running in his min from time to time

he might just sit down with you one day,

maybe just talking about his or your recent concerns, 

and then soon uall will find yourselves comfortable, having a heart to heart conversation

even though by opening up your heart to ten, or to anyone tbh, it makes you feel vulnerable, as you never know who might decide to use your insecurities against you,

you felt completely safe, secure and protected in ten's arms

his arms wrapped around you were like protective boundaries, protecting you from harm in this cruel world

the sound of his heartbeat was something that gave you warmth and comfort

as if a reminder to you that somebody will always be by your side

and that's ten chittaphon leechaiyapornkul

as if both of your hearts were connected by invisible strings

the sound of his breaths into your ear provided you a sensation of bliss

even if the world was constantly beating you down, you were assured of the fact that you were able to return to the arms of your loved one

he was a hero

your hero

a short one

but still one

ten might enjoy teaching you dance moves from time to time

and more often than not, you would find yourself laughing blissfully with ten,

twirling and tripping in the living room of your house or his dorms

if you had a performance/ showcase, 

he would make sure he is able to attend every single one

not forgetting to get you a bouquet of roses for every performance

him being your best supporter ever

"(Y/N)!! The prettiest! The best! The most talented! The most attractive! My (Y/N), let's go, wooooo"

you'd be hiding your face in embarrassment but unable to stop the wide smile from forming on your tomato red face 

he would boast about you to all his friends and family

never forgetting to mention the good qualities of yours

he acknowledges all your faults,

yet you're still the best star shining in his galaxy dark eyes

where can i get somebody as supportive as this

you would enjoy teasing ten about his embarrassing pre debut past,

and now it was his turn to hide his flushed face into your shoulder/ neck

"stop it ah (Y/N)-ahhhhh"

"nAW neVeR"

" wuuuu ㅠㅠ"

whiny ten 

i'm so soft for ten

but overall

he would be an amazing boyfriend

always by your side

always putting you first

making you think every time 

about you managed to meet and fall in love with such a brilliant Thai prince

This was a bit short, but i hope yall like it! 

#nctwriters #nct #nct u #nct 127 #nct dream #nct imagine #nct scenario #nct reaction #nct fanfic #ten #chittaphon leechaiyapornkul #ten imagine #taeil #johnny #taeyong #yuta #jaehyun #doyoung #winwin #mark #renjun #jeno #haechan #jaemin #jisung #chenle #kpop #kpop imagine #kpop scenario #kpop reaction