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maeo-png · 7 months

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"I’m thinking of moving."

#YAAS KING #GET BETTER #adventure time #fionna and cake #fionna and cake spoilers #kind of but just being safe #simon petrikov #my art #adventure time fanart #fionna and cake fanart

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taboo-delusion · 1 month

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So, I just discovered something interesting.

This is a bit of a long one, so bear with me. It's important. Seriously.

I just woke up a few hours ago. My meds are starting to kick in. I was having a very serious and genuine, deep conversation (in-head) and it was... beautiful. It wasn't happy, but it was beautiful. Not the point.

Point is:

I had not had a single fucking intrusive thought today until someone made a noise in the other room.

I am so fucking PISSED OFF

Why my brain refuses to realize that intrusive thoughts CAUSED the good feeling to go away, I have no fucking idea. I've known that for almost a year now, yet my stupid fucking subconscious refuses to change anything it's doing

Before I snap my fucking android phone in half and yeet somebody's face into neptune, I thought I'd share the discovery!!!!

Basically:

MY INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS DID NOT START UNTIL SOMETHING STARTLED ME OUT OF FOCUS

AS I TYPE THIS, I REALIZE THAT INTRUSIVE THOUGHTS -AT LEAST FOR ADHDERS- ARE A SURVIVAL TACTIC.

Elaborating:

When you fall asleep and your heart slows too much, your body does the falling thing to make sure you're still alive.

It's not that intrusive thoughts are *Just* because your brain gets too quiet, It's because your life has never been completely quite before, or -like me- the few times it is quiet, something interrupts. And even if it doesn't piss you off, even if you don't jump like I do, your brain still registers it as not safe.

--

Falling asleep, heart slows a lot-

Body: *Sends adrenaline just to make sure it still actually works.*

Drowning, even mostly unconscious-

Body and brain: *Hold onto that last half-breath even if it feels like you're head is going to explode.*

Going grocery shopping or talking to someone you think is cool-

Brain: *Remembers what it felt like the first time your guardian was indifferent or mean about something that made you happy or calm.*

Things around you actually get quiet-

Brain *Sends a thought you hate just to make sure you're prepared for a sudden problem.*

TDLR 1: Your brain isn't mean on purpose, It's just paranoid and still has a will to live.

Listen. I know I'm just some random dude from a weird blog. But I'm trying to translate, to assist. Maybe somebody else needs this realization as much as I do. I apologize for the yelling earlier. I'm still just as upset, but only at my dumbass subconscious. Now some time has passed, and I have regained self-control.

(I also apologize for the above paragraph, my brain nags for me to do this, but I can't remember why. So:)

I am no psychologist. Here are my qualifications (why you should listen to me):

As my friends call it- "Disturbingly self-aware at all times."

Paranoid Schizophrenic with actual (unrelated) OCD, with years of experience dealing with it- more healthily in recent years.

Philosophy and deep thinking is simply my default. I use metaphors, but everything in this post is entirely literal, ...except the angry threat. (*begrudgingly accepts disappointment*)

I am a fiction writer. I don't know about healing people/first aid, but I know a LOT about how anatomy works, with many deep-dives on the psychology/evolution side.

People irl generally consider me a genius? Idk how to gauge that, IQ tests are irrelevant with this type of... smart?. I've been compared to both Da Vinci and Einstein. So, ...actually that's pretty fuckin' cool- (I AM NOT TRYING TO BRAG! I APOLOGIZE IF IT COMES OFF THAT WAY! I've never put it all down like this, and I'm just surprised and questioning my reputation.)

(Also, I love playing detective, so naturally I call myself Batman XD.)

Autistic; I experience the world, and every situation, from a view without any context.

ADHD: My brain automatically -As a guardian I hate describes- "Can watch three different movies at the same time, all in fast forward, and can keep up with all of them." ... Well, yes, but technically no. Idk if other ADHD people do this, but my brain "connects the dots" so quickly, I end up laughing at jokes I've never heard before the 'punchline', because I've already figured out what you're going to say next.

Now combine all that. I am kicking depression's ass and now I want to help you do the same.

I have only mentioned the relevant things. Please keep in mind that ALL of these have both advantages and disasters. Thank you for your patience and understanding. I am running on four hours of sleep. For the love of whatever, I hope this actually helps someone other than me.

Qualifications are noted because: This is all stuff (and stuff like this) that I am just always casually aware of.

TLDR2: Even if I wasn't trying to help people feel better, Apparently I was born with a nat 20 perception/insight check, so please don't argue that I truly understand what I'm talking about here.

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mrkmciver · 3 months

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#Attract Better

#life lessons #personal growth #you #life #perspective #self improvement #people #life goals #goals #move forward #get better #attract better

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your---dancestyle · 10 days

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There's something so surface level about the beef the RatGrinders have with the Bad Kids. Cause like yeah, looking in, they start with incredible talent, and only get more and more cool and powerful, and they have these titles and positions of Arch Devil and Oracle(s) and Saint. But they earned those, truly put their lives on the line for that level of skill. And it's so interesting to see the Last Stand, and as Brennan said during the Adventure Party, see how the work that the Bad Kids put in have paid off, in comparison to the Rat Grinders who even if they're going out and killing rats for hours everyday, can't possibly actually match the skill level and know how and talent of the bad kids that they actually earned.

And because they know their spells and attacks so well, and they work as a team So Well, they defeat the fucking exam! The first ever to do so, with literally no deaths, no drops, and 100% on the written questions!

#bad kids #rat grinders #get better #d20 #fhjy #fhjy spoilers #they did So Well im so proud of my children!#rumblingnrambling

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lifeofafreckledredhead · 9 months

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"You're so strong"... Its Bullshit

You’re so strong is all you hear when you tell your story, but you don’t see it.

You don’t see It; you don’t see how you are “so strong.”

You survived and that left you with a lifetime worth of trauma to work through by yourself.

They don’t understand it and they don’t know what kind of toll it has put on you.

They don’t know that something as simple as a scent can send you back into a memory you might not have even known you had.

Something as little as watching the news and a trigger hits.

When a trigger hits all you want to do is take a shower and spend an hour scrubbing your skin raw

When you lay your head down to sleep that you fear what dream you will have

you stay up instead just staring at the ceiling wondering what you did to deserve this pain and when this pain will end.

You’re so strong though.

It sounds so simple and generic, almost cheap.

A.Val

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dr00dr · 2 months

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#my pics #my pictures #disney #disneyland #inspiring quotes #inspiration #girlblogging #beautiful quote #life quote #motivation #inspo #quotes #inspiring words #quoteoftheday #life quotes #current mood #self help #get better

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loveyourlovelysoul · 6 months

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You know how it works with anxiety: maybe you are tired or a bit stressed/overwhelmed or maybe not (maybe it's just unconscious are you actually feel okay anyway), until a sudden intrusive thought comes in offering you a very reasonable confirmation for any of your worries or preoccupations or frustrations. It starts growing as you give it importance and attention, and it keeps giving you more and more reasonable proofs for your fears and insecurities, until you cannot control it anymore: the story your mind is telling you, is so convincing you cannot stop listening despite it's carrying you down a hole of pain and heavy breathing.

It feels like there is no way out at this point. Your mind is right, you are unlovable, or this situation is not resolvable. But that's only what it wants you to believe: it doesn't want you to experience pain caused by change (even a positive one, but still unknown and therefore "unsafe"), so in order to keep you stuck in the same known comfortable place, it sends you these messages, not realizing they're even more painful than any change.

Despite how you feel, there's a way out. And it's trying to distract yourself as soon as you feel like your mind is starting to take you to a place you don't want and don't have to go. Anytime there's a similar "emotional trigger" (anytime you experience a similar emotion towards something, like lack of trust, of self worth, feeling stuck...), try to focus on something else and do not follow it when you're not ready to sit and have a proper talk with it (confronting it and trying to realize it's not trustable despite how reasonable it looks). Try to focus on your breathing and to take deep long breaths (inhale from your nose and exhale from your mouth for as long as you can, better if you can breathe with your belly too: at first breath in air in your stomach/lungs and then move to your belly, go slow); ground yourself using your senses: touch/caress your legs/body, smell something nice, hug something (like a soft blanket or plushie), feel your feet on the ground, drink water or something warm, hold a piece of ice in your mouth, sing, yawn, swallow (helps your vagus nerve to react), listen to calm music; walk, move your legs/body with slow movements or even shake your whole body (arms, legs, head.., like a dog shaking water away from themselves. also, make your lips vibrate together like saying brrrr); watch a movie, paint, do anything else you feel like that can calm you and help you, even sleeping. You can come back to those thoughts when you have a clearer mind, you don't have to do everything immediately: it won't change anything (even if your mind tells you otherwise: these thoughts and what they say, can wait to be solved and analyzed).

Trust that this is just a process and even if it will take time and you may experience this same pattern so many times in your life, you'll reach a point in which it won't have too much power over you. Be patient and kind anytime you'll experience a fallback. Just try to not discard your emotions and feelings for too long: give them attention when you feel grounded and stable enough (or talk with someone you trust or a professional figure: you don't have to do it all alone), try to understand and welcome them as they too are part of your self, the wounded part of you that needs help, love and support as much as any other side of you.

Even if it feels impossible, you can win over this. And know that you're already doing a great job by dealing with all the pain and stress this is bringing you. I am very proud of you.

Your mind knows nothing of how things will be, it has many good points but none of them is based on solid fundations: if something happened once, twice or even more, it doesn't mean it will happen again... unless you (unconsciously) create the same background for it to happen by listening to your mind's intrusive side. But we always have a choice, and before taking it, we can take our time to unwind and ground, be more stable, and in control of ourselves. Do not give up.

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straycalamities · 10 months

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i wanna be a horror artist i wanna be a weirdcore artist i wanna be a character artist i wanna do instimate scenes between characters i wanna emulate lisa frank or rainbow brite or the last unicorn i wanna emulate 90s anime i wanna evoke '00s numetal i wanna evoke '10s sadboy music i wanna evoke catchy vocaloid music w disturbing lyrics i wanna be like j-horror i wanna make yaoi i wanna do surrealism i wanna do abstract i wanna do cartoony i wanna do anime/manga i wanna do illustrations i wanna do comics i wanna do animation i wanna stick to askblogs i wanna express every part of me y_y

#txt #im a complex tangle of a wide variety of influences and aesthetics and interests and foundations #and i feel like my art maybe reflects uuuuuuuuh 10% of it #maybe #i wish it was more im just STUPID #AND DONT KNOW HOW #ive studied for YEARS #whats the SECRET #when it comes to art im really like...not uh #i dont wanna say not good bc im not here trying to put myself down (entirely)#more like im just not as uhhmmm rrerrmrmrm refined? no thats not the word either like. i'm not really an Artist in the full sense of the wo #i feel like tons of ppl have a better idea of the fundamentals of art and i dont just mean the techniques and physical skillsets #i mean mental and even emotional #i feel really stunted and behind and have ever since college x_x #and ive been so lost on how to grow in anything but physical skill #like my anatomy knowledge and persepctive knowlsdge and etc etc etc #get better #but how to express myself? just gets worse tbqh #idk how to like...approach ART as a practician #and not just an observer #like i just wish my art was more ART and emotional and raw and stylistic and ME #and not just uhhhh literal scenes of characters #bc thats all my brain can conceptualize #i wanna thinK DEEPER RAAAAAAAAAAAAAA #i wanna create art as deep as the art i like SEEING

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the-wip-project · 3 months

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SloMo WriNo: Instantly Improve Your Writing With One Simple Trick

Want to make your writing instantly better?

Don’t we all?

Promising instant improvement is an easy way to hook eyes, (I’m sort of sorry for click-baiting you— but not too much.) so a lot of writing advice is framed that way.

But is it actually possible?

Generally the advice on those types of posts isn’t anything revolutionary. You’re told to eliminate adverbs/filter words/telling. Or perhaps the advice is additive. You should start using all 5 (or even 6?) senses in every description, do or don’t use certain tenses or povs, change up sentence lengths, use more paragraph breaks, and so it goes.

It’s (usually) all useful advice, especially when applied in moderation. (No one will come and shoot you for occasionally using suddenly or summarizing a scene instead of showing every detail.)

The issues is that a lot of writers (especially beginner writers) are seeking some sort of magic bullet. That one trick that will change everything and magically make you good. (never mind that ‘good’ is far more nebulous and subjective than anyone wants to admit.)

Sadly, once you get beyond learning things like punctuation and when to insert paragraph breaks, there’s not really any single technique that you can quickly apply and immediately lift the quality of your writing.

For the rest, it really takes time. Even if the advice is good, you need to learn when and how to apply it.

As such, there’s only one technique that will definitely make your writing better.

Practice.

Yeah. So boring. The least sexy piece of writing advice. Write more.

But it’s also the simplest. (Not always the easiest, but definitely the simplest!) Writing is not mystic or singular. It’s just like any other art or craft. The only way you get good is by spending time at it. And just like anything else, you’re going to be bad before you can start to get good.

You would never expect to become an accomplished guitarist by spending lots of time listening to and thinking about music, while almost never picking up your instrument to practice. And you will not become a good writer without practicing the action of writing.

It’s a comforting idea that gets bandied around at times, that writing isn’t just fingers on the keys or pen on paper. That it’s thinking and daydreaming and making mood boards etc. While those writing adjacent things are fun and undoubtedly can help you write, they are not writing. They are not practice.

Spending your time doing those things instead of writing do not make you a better writer, and obviously they don’t finish your novel or writing project.

Which is my goal here. To help you finish your project. As such I spend very little time on dispensing advice on plot or prose, and focus mostly on the process of writing.

That’s not to say that I don’t think you should spend time on learning how to write better prose, or how to create compelling characters and plot, those things are important! But if attempting to learn that stuff gets in the way of practice, then it’s counterproductive.

So don’t let the writing advice become the focus of your writing. Apply advice slowly, and don’t overwhelm yourself with trying to fix all your perceived faults at once. (I still have a difficult relationship with punctuation, but I’m learning. Slowly.) If you can, focus on techniques that interest you. Keep things low pressure— fun even?

Yes you want your work to be as good as possible, but also, you’re doing this writing thing because you enjoy it, right? So don’t allow the pressure to be good to stop you from having fun. If trying to apply a certain piece of writing advice is making you miserable, toss it aside. It’s either bad advice, or it’s not the right time for you to worry about it. Above all, avoid anything that kills your joy and makes writing a miserable chore.

So I guess this is my one piece of advice that will improve your writing (process) instantly.

Enjoy yourself, and ditch anything that ruins that joy. You’ll get better at your own pace, as long as you keep writing.

—Maree

Subscribe to my substack to make sure you don't miss a post, chat with me on the WIP Project discord, and tag any posts you make about the challenge with #slomowrino if you want me to see them!

#slomowrino #writing advice #get better #instant improvement

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willsolaceloml · 2 years

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Im actually so tired of people acting like Will Is a "soft boy" "sunshine" "never angry/sad"

HE IS NOT!! PEOPLE WAKE!! UP!!!

He lost more than 2 sibilings, became the Apollos cabin counsellor at THIRTEEN! He was in the front line of not one but TWO of the wars. He Is BRAVE.

He was one of the only people that talked to Nico Di Angelo, Mister Gloom&Death, with no fear, looking him straight (well...) in the eyes and telling him what he needed to tell him with no problems. He was the one healing Annabeth right after he lost his older brother. He was the one that literally ran with 6 romans behind him just to distract them. He insulted people that had the power to easily kill him. He stopped a whole room full of enemies (including the literal villain) just by saying "stop". He walked in that room, probably disarmed and definitely a worst fighter than his enemies, with no fear whatsoever, just focused on protecting the people he loves.

And we literally know so little about him, so who knows what else he did.

In what world Is that being soft? Yall need to uncork your hears and read his like 3 scenes properly cause its not normal to misunderstand THIS bad a non-complex character.

Is he nice? Yeah! Is he sweet? Im sure he is! Is he soft? No. Hes not. And yk what? Lets not act like hes always that nice either cause you know damn well that boy can be an asshole.

Stop infantilizing the shit out of him, hes not your "soft bean uwu boy needs to be constantly protected by Nico", hes a traumatized kid in a queer relationship. Thats literally it.

And dont let me start on the "hes always happy and bees flowers and rainbows" cause like. Be serious.