#I don't really suit short hair. which upsets me a lot

[aubeezz]

I’d like to consider myself the definition of “Non-binary folks don’t owe you androgyny.” (/lh /hj) But sometimes it would be nice to not have people use that as an excuse to misgender you lmao

#White short haired brunettes #for context I'm always asked why I am non-binary if I don't look it. #I wish a lot of people were educated more lol #esp newer members of the lgbt+ community #I wanna just cut all my hair off and go funky with colours but #I don't really suit short hair. which upsets me a lot #Not all NB ppl are gnc or ...that are skinny #rant #ignore this idk it's been hitting hard recently

[here2bbtstrash]

look down on me like that - 9 (explicit)

genre: slow burn enemies to lovers hatefucking coworkers au, smut, angst

pairing: yoongi x reader

summary: your asshole coworker min yoongi has made it his personal mission to ruin your life.

word count: 16k 🙈

contains: explicit sexual content 👀 literally jumps immediately into it (well.... you'll see 🤭) so buckle up!!! also features: hotel drama, reader being v dumb in classic reader fashion but she gets there, a whole lotta tension and angst and misplaced anger, some new friends!!! and yes they're 3 idols see if you can figure out who 🤪, erotic bed sharing and handholding lmfao, probably the most drinking that has happened in a chapter yet (which is saying a lot honestly), of course the GRAMMY RESULTS.... oh yeah and yoongi in glasses, yoongi in a suit, yoongi playing piano, yoongi almost getting in a fight, yoongi rapping, yoongi WEARING CAT EARS (yes these are all warnings!!!!!! 😩) - ok and here are ur smut specific warnings: semi-public sex (mile high club anyone ✈️), cunnilingus, fingering, sex dreams, nipple play, dirty talk, reader has a voice kink 🥴, clit stim, unprotected sex AGAIN 💀, she squirts again don't @ me lmao, aaaaand some lovely mouth/throat fuckin 🫡

A/N: i feel like i have nothing to say that isn't just overwhelming gratitude to you all for being here 🥺 so i'll keep it short!!! sit back and get comfy bc this one's a lot, here we go y'all..... you ready?? 💜

A/N 2: as of 5/27, this chapter has been updated to remove the instances of anti-asian discrimination. i want to expressly state how sorry i am to those who were hurt or otherwise upset by the original content. please know that i mean it when i say i am fully committed to listening and doing better moving forward. 💜

an eternal thank you to @haliiimede and @monimonimoon for their help betaing!!!

read on AO3!

chapter eight | masterlist | chapter ten

~*~

You don’t know how you let Yoongi talk you into this.

You honestly can’t remember, at least not right now, not with your ass perched on the edge of the sink counter and his hands making quick work to tug your sweats and underwear down and off, one ankle at a time.

The place is cleaner than any airplane bathroom you’ve ever been in, and certainly much less cramped. First class really spares no expense, you’ve learned. It’s an upgrade Yoongi made for both of you at the check-in counter unprompted, his only explanation mumbled into the rim of his iced Americano once you’d settled at a table in the fancy lounge: “Economy seats fuck my back up, and I figured if I left you behind you’d push me into LA traffic at your first opportunity.”

You might still do it, if only because he’s managed to convince you to do this again. Weren’t you supposed to be mad at him?

“I’m starting to think you have a bathroom fetish,” you murmur, not quite managing to keep your voice steady. Your fingers rake through Yoongi’s long dark hair as he situates himself properly on his knees between your legs, his hands pressing your thighs to spread you wider.

“Are you complaining?” he grunts back, and you lose the ability to form a coherent response as he leans in and traces his tongue up your folds.

You nearly bang your head on the mirror with the way your spine instinctively arches at the feeling, your hips tilting up for as much of his mouth as you can get.

“Shit,” you hiss as he starts to fuck the muscle of his tongue into your entrance, his thumb swiping up through your wetness before settling into rough circles over your clit. “Why are you so fucking good at this?”

Once he’s thoroughly tasted you, Yoongi quickly replaces his tongue with his fingers, flexing against your front wall at a brutal pace, like he’s realized you can’t take too long in here. His lips close around your clit as his tongue laps over it in thick strokes, and your hips circle hungrily, grinding on him.

“That’s it,” he pulls off just enough to gasp. “Ride my face. Wanna make you come so I can fuck this tight little pussy.” Just the rough tone of his voice is nearly enough to send you over the edge.

When his lips and tongue return to your cunt, you don’t hold back.

You fist the hand tangled in his hair, your other palm smacking flat to the counter for balance as you throw a leg over his shoulder, and you swear you can hear him laughing while you press your heel into his back to pull him even closer. His mouth is warm and wet and divine, the way he licks and sucks at your throbbing clit overwhelming. He strokes his fingers deftly into your g-spot, working up enough arousal that it’s started to run down the crux of your thighs. You roll your hips again and gasp at the way his tongue drags just right over you.

“Oh god, Yoongi,” you groan, squeezing your eyes shut, too lost in it to worry about being quiet. You can feel it as he keeps his tongue laid out flat for you to use as you please. Everything in you pulls tight as you rut yourself against his face in time to the building pressure worked up in your core by his unrelenting fingers. “Fuck, fuck, fuck, I’m gonna—”

The plane dips sharply, and you lurch upright with a gasp as your eyes snap open. There’s a few more seconds of shuddering bumps, and then you seem to find clear skies again.

Your heart hammers in your chest as you sit back and try to steady your breathing, the world slowly coming into focus: the TV screen in front of you, your purse tucked into the shelf beneath it, beige privacy walls surrounding you on all sides.

Fuck. You lean forward, letting your head drop between your knees as reality sinks in. You’re not in the bathroom. You’re in your stupid first-class seat. It was a dream. A fucking airplane sex dream.

Panic carves through you like a knife as questions bubble up in your mind: What if you said something in your sleep? Did Yoongi hear you? Is he sitting on the other side of the wall with that fucking smirk on his face, endlessly smug in the knowledge that he haunts you even in your dreams?

Immediately convinced that he is, you can’t help yourself. You press your hands flat to the divider between you and just barely lift out of your seat so you can peek over it.

But Yoongi looks entirely unchanged from the last time you saw him several hours earlier: he’s got his headphones on and is slouched over his laptop, frowning down at the screen, thoroughly engrossed in work.

Just as you’re breathing a sigh of relief, he glances up, and your eyes widen.

“Can I help you?” he grunts, not even bothering to pull his headphones off. You don’t think it’s a double entendre, but you don’t want to entertain him long enough to find out.

“No,” you snap, and then you slump back down to the safety of your seat, slamming the controller on the wall until you’re fully horizontal. You tug the provided headphones over your ears, hoping they might block out your racing thoughts as you desperately try to ignore the dull ache between your legs.

~*~

Getting any more sleep proves to be an impossible task, your mind too keyed up at the possibility of another airplane bathroom dream. By the time you make it through the rest of the flight, and customs, and the car ride to your hotel, you’re nearly delirious with exhaustion, and your body is thoroughly confused about what fucking time it is, though your phone says it’s apparently the middle of the night.

Your brain feels like it’s been in a blender, your reaction time so slowed that, standing at the hotel check-in counter, it takes you several seconds to process the words leaving the front desk agent’s mouth.

She must be able to read the dumbfounded look on your face, because she repeats herself. “King bed executive suite for three nights?”

“Um, no,” you finally manage to stammer, and though he makes no discernible noise of reaction, it’s like you can feel Yoongi smirking over your shoulder. “No, we need— I booked a room with two queens.”

The agent purses her lips slightly, then shakes her head as she stares down at her computer. “Mm, I’m seeing in the system that we have you down for one king.”

Your exhaustion steamrolls over whatever professionality you might normally have while conducting a business transaction. “I don’t care what your fucking system says, it’s wrong. That’s not what I booked.” Scrolling through your phone for a few seconds, you manage to dig up the email, and you’re almost more compelled to show it to Yoongi, just to make sure he’s well aware— you did not fuck this up.

“See, two queens,” you reiterate helplessly as you extend the receipt on your phone toward the agent.

She tuts once, her eyes barely glancing over at your phone before returning to her computer screen. “Unfortunately, it doesn’t seem like we have any availability to switch you. Given the Grammys are on Sunday, this is quite a busy weekend for us.”

You set your phone on the counter and try to keep your breathing steady, to remain calm despite the overwhelmed panic starting to rise in your chest.

“About that,” you say, doing your best to speak in an even voice. “We wanted to keep a low profile, but my… associate here is actually a nominee. For Song of the Year?” You hate that it comes out more like a question as your gaze flits to Yoongi for the briefest of seconds, then back to the front desk agent. “So, really, if there’s anything at all you could do, we would appreciate it.”

There’s a pause as she regards you for a moment, her lips pressed into a tight smile, and then she speaks again. “I really do apologize, but a mistake on your part does not constitute an emergency on ours. No matter who the accommodation is for.”

It takes a second for your jetlag-addled brain to process the words, and their direct contrast to the forced sunny expression on her face. If you were in a better state of mind you might be able to take a breath, state your case more calmly, or figure out some other alternative, but instead all you can manage is a knee jerk reaction.

Because you can’t be in a room with Min Yoongi and only one bed.

“Are you fucking kiddin—”

“Hey.” 

A hand pressed to your bicep nearly makes you jump out of your skin. Despite every cell in your body urging you to lunge over the counter, you don’t fight it when Yoongi pulls you back a few paces, giving enough room for him to take your place at the counter.

“It’s fine,” he mutters over his shoulder.

It feels like your heart is beating a mile a minute, enough that you can hardly keep up with the soft apology he concedes to the agent. She hands him the room keys without another word, that same fake smile still plastered over her face. With one last nasty look over your shoulder, you follow Yoongi toward the elevators, dragging your suitcase along behind you.

Practically seething, you can barely manage to wait until the doors slide shut before you pounce.

“Look, I don’t know what you think is about to happen here, but I did not fucking book a single bed room.”

“It’s fine,” he sighs wearily, eyes fixed on the overhead number as it counts up to your floor. “I just want to sleep. Whatever that was about to turn into wasn’t worth the trouble.”

The doors slide open with a soft chime, and you storm after him down the hall to your room as he continues, pressing the key to the reader and pushing the door open. “Besides, I've stayed here before, and I know these suites have couches.” He holds the door and gestures for you to enter first, and you do.

He's not wrong: there’s a small living room area with a sofa, a desk, and a television mounted into a wall that effectively separates it from the bedroom on the other side, though there isn’t actually a door. The bathroom is immediately to your left as you step inside.

“So,” Yoongi says simply as the door shuts behind him. “I'll take the couch. All good.”

Of fucking course.

The rational part of your brain knows that he has done nothing to upset you. He's been quiet and polite on your long day of travel, and is treating you simply as if you were business acquaintances. It all makes perfect sense, given that you told him your night at his apartment couldn’t mean anything. He's done everything you’ve asked of him, really.

And yet it’s all of it: your stupid sex dream, the lingering bad taste of your encounter with the hotel agent, and the fact that Yoongi can’t seem to even fathom the idea of sharing a bed with you, not here and certainly not at his apartment. Everything has you simmering with a sudden vicious, unreasonable anger.

“Do whatever you want,” you snap as Yoongi sets his suitcase down on the floor of the living room. “I don’t give a shit.”

The rage burns like acid in your gut as you move through your night routine in the bathroom, and it’s only worsened by the knowledge that your alarm will be going off in just a few hours, and you’ll have to drag yourself through a long day of press and prep for Sunday. And that Yoongi will be there, through all of it, just like he’s on the other side of the door right now, inescapably and overwhelmingly present.

It doesn’t make sense to you how he can somehow manage to be too distant and too close at the same time. As you spit toothpaste into the sink, you wonder why the fuck you ever agreed to go on this stupid trip.

~*~

You don’t think you manage more than ten minutes of sleep the whole night. Despite exhaustion weighing heavy in your limbs, you toss and turn and kick at the blankets, too frustrated by all the confusing feelings churned up inside of you to be able to slip into any kind of real rest.

When you glance at the clock for the millionth time, it’s now only thirty minutes until your alarm is due to go off. With a sigh, you decide to give up.

Your mind is already racing with the schedule for the day, and you go over it a million times in your head as you shower and dress and apply your makeup. When you emerge from the bathroom already entirely put together, Yoongi is on the couch blinking blearily at his phone, clearly having just woken up.

“The car will be here at seven,” you call over your shoulder without a second glance back at him.

He grunts his acknowledgement, and after a few moments you hear the sound of the bathroom door sliding shut again. You dig your work laptop out of your purse to double-check everything, and before you know it you’re sucked into confirming specifics and answering emails, and you completely lose track of time.

The sound of Yoongi clearing his throat snaps you back to reality, and you shut your laptop as you glance up to find him standing in the threshold of the bedroom. He’s dressed nicely for his many interviews, in a sky-blue button-down, and you have to blink twice as you take in his appearance.

“You wear glasses?”

The warm lamplight of the bedroom reflects off his lenses as he shrugs. “I don’t like to. But I forgot my contacts.”

“We can stop for some on the way to your fitting,” you answer, adding it to your mental to-do list. The reminder of your booked itinerary is enough to get you to your feet, one arm wrapped around your laptop to press it close to your chest. Trying to remember what else you need to do to get ready proves impossible as Yoongi steps closer, and then you hear him laugh softly under his breath.

“Wow, glasses? Really?”

“What?”

“You have that look on your face,” he says simply, and you can feel an embarrassed heat creep up your neck. You hate that after all this time, he can still read you like a book.

You swallow hard. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

He continues to close the distance between you, and you take a reflexive step backward, only for your thighs to bump against the mattress behind you. “Would’ve worn these more often if I knew they’d get you all flustered.”

You attempt to argue that you’re not flustered, but the words die on your tongue with the realization of how close Yoongi is to you now. His eyes are fixed pointedly on your mouth. “I—” you try again, your voice breaking slightly. “I’m not—”

The sharp buzz of your phone vibrating on the nightstand makes both of you start, and it’s like you can think clearly again when Yoongi steps back to give you room to grab it. You thumb open the text with one hand as you shove your laptop into your purse with the other. “They’re downstairs.”

Yoongi doesn’t say anything else to you until you’re in the car, crawling through Los Angeles traffic. “Remind me what all we’re doing today?”

You stare out the windshield, not wanting to meet his gaze as you recount the schedule that’s permanently seared into your brain. “You have press interviews in Studio City all morning until one. We’ll pick up lunch— and we can grab you some contacts, too— and then you have a fitting in Beverly Hills at two. After that, your boss wants us to tour the office out here and take a few meetings with the team, so that’ll be the rest of the afternoon. And then I guess whenever we’re done with that, the label execs want to take us to dinner after.”

He’s silent for long enough that you’re forced to glance over at him, wondering if he was even paying attention. There’s a small smile on his face, but it doesn’t quite read as smug. You don’t know what to make of it.

“Huh,” Yoongi finally remarks.

“What?” you snap in response, probably a little harsher than he deserves, but you haven’t had coffee yet.

“Nothing,” he says innocently. “It’s just funny, compared to when you first started.” He crosses his arms over his chest, shifting back slightly in his seat. “I remember when you couldn’t even use Outlook.”

You narrow your eyes in his direction. “I guess people change.”

“Guess so.”

The day passes in a hectic blur, and though ostensibly all of your scheduled engagements are meant to be about Yoongi, you find yourself just as busy as he is, if not moreso.

His press interviews run long because of course they do, and you’re forced to drop him at his fitting while you run out to pick up lunch and contacts— and most importantly, more coffee, which you desperately require to survive the rest of the day.

You’re admittedly thankful for the extra tasks. Even if you do feel dead on your feet, it’s still preferable to sitting around and watching Yoongi try on a suit. You can easily recall firsthand how deadly the image is, and putting off that suffering until the real thing tomorrow is perfectly fine, as far as you’re concerned.

The coffee gives you just enough of a caffeine boost to power through your afternoon meetings, reviewing branding strategies and opportunities for collaborative promotions with the label’s overseas team. Your heart sinks a little when you go through the marketing summary slides prepared by Jungkook, not a single detail out of place, and you try to shove thoughts of him to the back of your mind so you can focus on the work.

At dinner, it’s all you can do to not fall asleep over your extremely overpriced sashimi. Yoongi’s been pulled away to the far side of the table for what you can only assume are deeply boring conversations with the Los Angeles production team. Thankfully, your side is a bit more lively.

“Matthew,” the A&R rep who you’re pretty sure introduced herself as Tiffany stage-whispers. You realize she’s speaking to the tall and ridiculously built guy seated next to you when her gaze flits up to him, and then she resumes poring over the extensive drink menu. “Can we get sake bombs?”

“Why are you asking me?” Matthew responds, and you look over to see his face scrunched up in confusion.

“You’re in finance! I need you to tell me that I can get white-girl wasted on the label’s dime tonight.”

He sighs for a moment, like he’s trying to think. “I don’t… actually know if we’re allowed to reimburse that.” Tiffany’s lower lip trembles, dangerously adorable, and he exhales as if he’s been defeated. “Fuck it. I’ll cover it out of pocket if we can’t.”

“God, I love you,” she breathes, chasing the comment with a throaty laugh and quickly flagging down a server to order. “Can we please do thr— Vernon, baby, how old are you?”

The intern seated next to her blinks slowly. “Twenty four?” You’re pretty sure those are his first words of the evening.

“Huh. Your skincare’s doing wonders,” Tiffany shakes her head disbelievingly. “Four sake bombs, please?”

They arrive in an instant, and Tiffany smiles proudly to herself as she balances her shot glass on a pair of chopsticks laid across the top of her beer. You follow Matthew and Vernon’s lead as they set their drinks up to mirror hers.

“To Matthew’s wallet,” Tiffany toasts solemnly. “The only thing bigger than his tits.”

As if in hearty agreement, Matthew bangs his fist against the table so hard it makes everyone in a five foot radius flinch, and all four of your shot glasses plummet into the awaiting beers beneath them.

“Kanpai, motherfuckers!” Tiffany cackles, and you throw your drinks back in perfect sync.

The rowdiness of your corner is too loud to be ignored, and your stomach twists slightly as you set your empty glass down only to catch Yoongi staring from across the table. When your eyes meet his, he quickly lowers his gaze and adjusts his glasses, his mouth pulling into a flat line.

You turn back to your new friends as Tiffany finishes her own drink. As if she just witnessed the silent exchange, she leans toward you.

“So,” she drops her voice a little lower, “What’s it like working with Suga?”

Doing your best to keep your face neutral, you inhale deeply, wondering where to begin, or what would even be workplace-appropriate to say. The jetlag makes your mind move that much slower. “It’s—”

“Oh my god,” she immediately interrupts you. “You’re sleeping with him.”

Vernon nearly spits the last swallow of his drink back out.

“Tiffany,” Matthew interjects, sounding exhausted, like this is a regular occurrence. “Don’t fucking say that to someone you just met.”

“I mean,” you concede, your lips loosened by the warm rush of alcohol. “She’s not wrong.”

Matthews eyes widen, and he purses his lips for a long pause before he finally speaks. “Shiiiiiit, okay. Alright then.”

You sigh, slumping to rest your cheek in your hand, so exhausted that you can barely stay upright. “I don’t know if ‘sleeping with’ is the right term. It’s just a… mistake that we’ve made. A few times. Several, I guess.”

“I bet he’s even richer than Matthew,” Tiffany says, awestruck, clearly more to herself than to you.

“If it’s a mistake, why do you keep making it?” Vernon asks bluntly.

“Damn, Vernon with the deep cut,” Matthew remarks, and you shake your head.

“I don’t know,” you murmur, your words running together slightly. “I’m just trying not to think about it, at least not while we’re on this stupid work trip.”

All three of them nod like they understand, and then Tiffany leans in again. “Let me guess: there’s only one bed in the hotel room.”

“Please ignore her.” Matthew sounds as tired as you feel.

“Yes!” you exclaim, your anger from the night before temporarily reigniting. “The hotel fucked our room up, and the lady wouldn’t fix it because she was a fucking bitch—”

“Naturally,” Vernon interjects.

“And even though we only have one bed, he chose to take the couch. Like, that’s where we’re at.”

“That’s sweet,” Tiffany murmurs, and you make a face.

“Is it?”

“He’s being respectful. I bet he doesn’t wanna make you feel uncomfortable, or like… pressured. ‘Cause sleeping with somebody is a world of difference from… sleeping with them, you know?”

You roll your eyes. “Or he wants to be as far away from me as possible, even while sleeping.”

“If I was the one nominated for a Grammy, I’d make you take the couch,” Vernon scoffs around a piece of edamame.

“Right?” Matthew chimes in. “Ain’t no way I’m getting good sleep on a hotel couch. Them things are like fuckin’ cement blocks.”

A yawn escapes you before you can manage to stifle it, and you press a hand to your mouth, suddenly overwhelmed from exhaustion as well as the conversation. You scoot your chair back from the table to stand and politely excuse yourself to the restroom.

“You gotta cool it with that shit, Tiff,” you hear Matthew mutter as you depart.

Your mind swims while you traverse the long back hallways of this bougie restaurant. It’s almost laughable now, but you really never thought to give Yoongi the benefit of the doubt for sleeping on the couch— not here, and not at his apartment.

You’re still so used to expecting the worst from him that you’ve just assumed the intention is laced into his every action. Even the nice things have felt like a cause for concern, like a reason to keep your guard up, small gestures meant to distract you so he can get the upper hand, somehow. It’s hard to shake the idea that he’s your enemy, even after everything that’s happened.

And yet you can’t help wondering if Tiffany is right. Is Yoongi really just being… respectful? And if so: what does he want? And how does he feel? You’re torn between wanting to know and hoping you never find out.

A voice saying your name drags you out of your thoughts. You turn back just shy of the restroom door, unable to stop another yawn from slipping out, and you bring a hand to your mouth to hide it. Your eyes widen as your brain works on a delay to process the familiar voice, then the sky-blue shirt and the dark framed glasses. It distantly occurs to you that Yoongi has you all alone in this fancy hallway.

You blink a few times, willing the weight of sleepiness out of your eyes, then finally respond with the first thing you can think of. “I’m not fucking you in the bathroom, Yoongi.”

He blinks right back at you, clearly not expecting that. “I… wasn’t asking you to.”

“What do you want then?” you snap, crossing your arms over your chest.

“I—” he sighs, and you can’t help but wonder if he suddenly regrets coming after you. “You’re tired.”

“Yes, because I barely fucking slept. And?”

You tell yourself that you’re just imagining the way his voice has softened slightly. “Dinner’s over. We don’t have to stay. They’ll get it.”

“I’m having fun,” you retort. “I made friends.”

“I saw,” he remarks, not quite able to hide his smirk.

“So please, don’t cut your boring producer conversation short on my behalf,” you continue dryly.

Yoongi rolls his eyes, to your surprise. “Yeah, it’s brutal. I’d much rather be sleeping.” He quirks an eyebrow. “Or doing sake bombs.”

The question rushes out before you can second guess if it’s a good idea to ask. “How did you sleep? On the couch?”

Yoongi shrugs, then rubs a hand at the back of his neck, making a face as if you’ve put him on the spot. “Like shit.”

You nod, your gaze dropping to the carpeted floor. “Well, I mean. Maybe it would make more sense if, uh—”

“’Scuse me—” a new voice causes your head to snap up again, and you take a step away from Yoongi as Tiffany slips between the two of you, moving quickly toward the women’s restroom.

“Sorry love, I have to break the seal!” she calls over her shoulder before the door slams shut.

The interruption is enough to make you swallow your suggestion, and Yoongi reaches into his pocket for his phone.

“I’ll call a car, because I’m tired,” he murmurs defensively. “You’re welcome to get your own later, if you want to stay out—”

“I don’t,” you say firmly. “It’s fine. Just tell me when the car’s here.” Before Yoongi can so much as respond, you shoulder the bathroom door open and fast-walk to the safety of a stall.

After breaking your own seal, you make your way out to a sink, and you’re a little taken aback to find Tiffany still there waiting for you. She’s hovering over the mirror, blotting at her forehead with a paper towel.

“I wanted to apologize if I came on too strong,” she says softly as you turn on the tap. “Matthew says my mind-reading abilities can be intimidating to people who don’t know me well.”

You can’t help but laugh. “It’s cool. You remind me of my best friend.”

“The highest honor there is,” she says with a knowing nod. When she turns to fully face you, shifting to rest her hip on the sink as you dry your hands, you have a feeling there’s more coming.

“So, can I be honest?”

“Go ahead,” you say, suddenly a little nervous.

“I know I just met both of you today, but— the way Suga was looking at you? Girl. He’s not taking the couch because he wants to.”

You smile politely at her reflection, and her eyes narrow. “I know you don’t believe me, and you don’t have to. Matthew doesn’t believe that he’s in love with me either, but we both have Leo Moons, so obviously we’re each waiting for the other person to cave first.” She shrugs, nonchalant. “Which is fine for us, but all I’m saying is, if you want something, there’s really nothing wrong with asking for it.”

The urge to shut her down is strong. It’s slightly unnerving to feel like a relative stranger is peering into your soul. “You make it sound easy,” you murmur with a dry laugh. “I don’t think bed-sharing is part of our… arrangement.”

Tiffany preens a little more in the mirror, deftly flipping her curtain of dark hair over one shoulder. “Maybe it’s not supposed to be, but trust me on this one. He won’t say no. And if he does, I owe you a sake bomb.”

A genuine smile blooms across your face, and it only widens when she holds up her pinky finger. You lock yours around it for a single shake. “Deal.”

Arm-in-arm with Tiffany, you return to your corner of the table, where she entertains you by bullying Matthew into buying another round of drinks while he groans about burning a hole in his pocket.

“If it helps,” you giggle, “I’m about to head out. So make it three instead of four.”

“Thank god,” Matthew breathes a sigh of relief. “This girl is so damn expensive.”

Tiffany pauses with a spoonful of matcha gelato— also ordered on Matthew’s dime— halfway to her mouth. “I literally have a Leo stellium, what the fuck do you expect?”

While they continue to bicker, your gaze floats down the table. You wonder if Tiffany’s mind-reading powers might be catching as your eyes land on Yoongi just in time for him to look up from his phone and meet your gaze. He nods his head once toward the entrance, and you nod back.

A shoulder bumps into yours, and you turn to see Tiffany subtly shoot you a thumbs-up. “Fighting!” she murmurs under her breath, and you laugh as you get to your feet and bid everyone goodnight.

Yoongi holds the door of the restaurant for you to exit first, then follows you into the large black car waiting for you on the curb.

The drive back to the hotel gives you just enough time to immediately talk yourself out of Tiffany’s suggestion. The thought of asking for what you want feels like a trap, like displaying weakness to the one person who could hit you hardest. Besides, what if she misread Yoongi entirely? She doesn’t know him at all, and has no idea of the way things are between you. It’s a terrible idea, you decide.

So you find yourself right where you were the night before, like a bad dream you can’t wake up from: face washed, teeth brushed, tossing and turning in a bed far too large for one person. You can feel your final thread of resistance snap clean in half as you angrily kick the blankets off, then get to your feet and storm into the living room.

Yoongi is still up, peering down at his phone screen on the couch, his glasses deposited atop the coffee table.

“You’re being stupid,” you huff, and he glances up, clearly not expecting the interruption.

“I am?”

“You’re going to the Grammys tomorrow,” you say, as if that will explain anything.

“So are you,” Yoongi counters.

“Well yeah, but nobody’s going to give a shit about me.”

“I’d argue that’s also true for me,” he murmurs dryly, then squints at you. “Sorry, why am I stupid?”

“Because you’re going to sleep terribly on this couch.”

Yoongi nods once. “Probably, yes.”

You sigh, because of course he’s going to drag this out of you. “And the bed is perfectly big enough for two people. We wouldn’t even be touching or anything. So…” Fuck, saying what you want is hard. “Can you just… stop being stupid?”

There’s a flash of recognition in his eyes, and you’re surprised when that trademark cocky smirk doesn’t spread across his face. If anything, he just seems hesitant as he slowly sits up. “You’re sure?”

You fold your arms across your chest, suddenly feeling exposed like this, standing in front of him in only your thin sleep clothes. “Please don’t make me say it again.”

The corner of Yoongi’s mouth just barely pulls up, so slight you could be imagining it. “I’ll be there in a sec.”

In the bedroom, you leave the lamp at the empty side of the bed switched on, then crawl back under the sheets on your side. Heat blooms in your face as you press your cheek to the cool pillowcase, purposefully facing out, then reach one arm up to turn off your own bedside lamp.

True to his word, a few minutes later you hear the unmistakable sound of Yoongi’s steps across the carpet, then feel the shift of the mattress as he slips into bed on his side. He fumbles on the nightstand with what must be his glasses and his phone, and then you hear the click of the light, and the room disappears into darkness.

There’s a rustle and a sigh as he makes himself comfortable, and you were right: the two of you can easily share the bed without touching, plenty of space on the mattress between you.

Even so, having him closer is somehow… better. Comforting. You try not to dwell too much on it.

Flipping over onto your back, you stare up at the infinite black of the ceiling above you, your eyes already starting to weigh heavy. You don’t know where the question comes from, or why you ask it.

“Are you nervous?”

When he answers, Yoongi sounds half-asleep, too. “About what?”

“The Grammys?”

“Oh.” There’s a stirring sound, and then he speaks, like he’s just remembered you can’t see him shrugging. “I don’t know. A little.”

The only reply you’re capable of is a soft hum, and now you really can’t keep your eyes open. You curl up on your side again, cheek smushing into the pillow, and your consciousness whirs up one last coherent thought before you fully slip under: What else would he be nervous about?

~*~

You wake up to the warm glow of morning beneath your eyelids, and when you blink them open, the room is lit soft, dappled in sunlight that has managed to sneak between the thick hotel curtains. It’s warm in this bed too, and comfortable, and you sigh quietly to yourself as you stir a little under the covers. With a stifled yawn, you move to turn onto your back, and it’s only when you meet a gentle resistance that you realize why you’re so warm.

Yoongi must just be waking up too, because you immediately feel his body start at the realization that he pulled you close at some point during the night: an arm thrown over your waist, his hips pressed flush against yours.

“Fuck,” he mutters, his voice low and rough with sleep. “Sorry.” As the mattress starts to shift behind you, you respond on pure physical instinct and close your hand around Yoongi’s wrist.

“Stay.” The word comes out hoarse, barely more than a whisper.

Yoongi’s response is a soft grunt, and a bolt of panic quickens your pulse. You’re suddenly worried he might not want to stay, that he might even laugh at you for thinking you could have it like this, wrapped in his arms and waking up slowly. The furthest thing from hatred— and isn’t that what this is supposed to be?

But then his grip tightens to pull you that much closer, and he wordlessly presses his face into the crook of your neck. Your heart flutters in your chest, sweet and terrified. The heat of his breath over your skin makes you lean into him instinctively, and when your hips tilt, you can feel the unmistakable bulge of his clothed cock against your ass.

“God,” Yoongi groans. The deep gravel of his voice is enough to tighten your nipples beneath your tank top. “You make me so fucking hard. Dreamt about fucking you in this bed.”

“We woke up early,” you murmur. “So. There’s time.”

He grunts a low note in response. You can already feel the thin material of your sleep shorts growing wet between your legs as you slowly grind your hips back on him. 

Yoongi’s hand slips up your body, fingertips dragging over the fabric of your top until his palm is pressed to the column of your throat. You inhale softly, your head tipping up to allow him better access. His grip just barely tightens, and when he speaks in your ear, you can hear the smile around his words. “Tell me what you want.”

“Want you to fuck me, Yoongi,” you breathe. “In this bed.”

When you repeat his words back to him, Yoongi exhales a laugh, and then you feel him press a kiss to the hinge of your jaw. Something melts open inside of you at the brush of his lips, a sudden rush of an emotion you haven’t felt in a very long time. Something you certainly never expected to feel with Min fucking Yoongi, of all people.

He releases his hold on your throat, and his hand makes short work of slipping the straps of your tank top off your shoulders, then yanking the loose fabric down to expose your tits. You shiver a little at the morning air against your bare skin.

Yoongi’s palm closes around one of your breasts, lazily massaging it, and you rut your ass back on him with a small whimper. The heat of his mouth trails more kisses up your neck, and then his deep voice is in your ear again.

“Did you sleep okay?” He pairs the question with his thumb dragging circles over the stiff bud of your nipple, earning another soft noise from you.

“Y-yeah,” you manage to respond. “Better than the first night.”

He hums against the shell of your ear, the timbre of his rough voice setting every last one of your nerve endings alight. Overcome with desire, you can barely focus on his words as his hand traces along your waist to slip down the back of your shorts.

“Me too. So much better than the fucking couch.”

Two of his fingers tease over your slit, and he huffs a disbelieving laugh at how wet he finds you, how turned on you already are. When he swipes between your folds to circle at your entrance, you can hear your own slickness, chased with a soft noise of appreciation that escapes Yoongi’s mouth as he plunges both digits into your pussy. You can’t help but moan, too.

He could easily make you come just like this, but you want him too much.

“Yoongi,” you murmur, twisting slightly to reach a hand behind you. You trace down the hard muscles of his stomach, apparent even through the thin fabric of his t-shirt, until your palm drags along the thick outline of his cock straining beneath his boxer briefs. He’s so hard that he pulses under your touch, and you’re sure he must be able to feel the way your pussy flutters at the thought of this cock filling you up.

“Needy,” he purrs, his mouth against your neck.

“Shut up,” you answer automatically, not quite able to keep your voice steady with the way he’s fucking his fingers into you.

But Yoongi doesn’t torment you— you only have to give his clothed length one slow pump before his hands are pushing your shorts over your legs, like he can’t get them off fast enough. You kick them the rest of the way off while he works his boxers down, and then you arch back as his cock starts to tease your pussy lips apart.

He slips easily through your folds, painting you both in a mixture of pre-cum and arousal as he grinds himself over the whole of your slit. You bite back a moan when the head of his dick rubs up to your clit, smearing wetness there in steady strokes that make you gasp and writhe.

“Can I go raw again?” he asks so softly in your ear, and your cunt throbs as you whimper your consent.

It’s impossible to keep quiet now, not with how perfectly his cock pushes into you, stretching you open to take him. You press your face into the pillow to slightly muffle your sounds, and you can hear Yoongi groan behind you.

“Fuck,” he hisses roughly. “You’re ruining me. I may never be able to go back to condoms.”

“Yoongi,” you whine as he sheathes himself fully with a grunt of effort, giving you a few moments to adjust before he moves. “If you keep fucking talking in my ear with your morning voice like that—” your own voice breaks off mid-sentence as he drags his cock out just to fuck it back into you, and you have to take a breath before trying again. “I’m gonna come in five seconds.”

When he presses his mouth to your shoulder, you can feel the smirk on his lips. “Is that right?” The low rumble of his question buzzes through you, and your walls tighten around him in response. “You like it that much?”

You can barely remember how to form words with the way he’s started to thrust, the head of his cock sparking hot pleasure each time he rubs himself over the ridges of your front wall. “What if I do?”

Yoongi hums into the crook of your neck, purposefully drawing the sound out to make a shiver run up your spine, and you can’t help moaning. His hand slips between your thighs to nudge them apart, and you’re easily pliant for him, spreading yourself at his guidance so his fingers can find your clit.

“I’d tell you how fucking good you look like this,” he murmurs against your skin. “How well you take my cock.” You roll your hips in time with his strokes, and his free arm slips between your shoulder and the bed to wrap around your chest, giving him leverage to fuck you harder.

“Oh my god.” You nearly choke on your words as he pounds into you, unrelenting now, and your fingertips claw desperately at the pillow beneath your head.

“Pussy’s always so fucking tight, shit,” he groans. “Should’ve just done this the whole weekend. Don’t know how I even let you leave the room.”

Your feet flex helplessly against the bedsheets as Yoongi’s hand rubs a steadily building pressure into your core that threatens to overflow. His fingers move in tight circles over your clit like he knows your body well— which, you guess, he does. The thought of him keeping you here all weekend, tangled up in these sheets, fucking you senseless and making you come again and again and again is dizzying, enough to make your pussy start to pulse around his length.

“Yoongi,” you gasp. “Fuck, fuck, you’re gonna make me come.”

His lips brush over your shoulder, his voice stilted by how roughly he’s fucking into you. “Yeah, come on this cock. Make a mess for me.”

The pleasure is so overwhelming you almost want to squirm away from it, but then his fingers press your clit just right to snap a final thread and send you over the edge. Your thighs shake violently as your climax rips through you, and a rush of fluid squirts out of your cunt to coat the length of his dick and soak a wet spot into the sheets.

Yoongi groans unabashedly at the sight, still fucking you through the waves of your orgasm, his thrusts slowing as if to hold off his own end while your pussy keeps shuddering around him.

You take your time coming all the way down, lost in how good it feels, and then you slump back against the pillow with a ragged sigh, your head swimming. “Holy shit.”

His throbbing-hard cock is still clenched inside your heat, and the bed shifts when he gently pulls out. Dazed, you turn over to watch him as he kneels up on the bed next to you, his knees sinking soft divots into the mattress, and starts to slowly pump himself.

And fuck. He looks so good like this: long hair mussed from sex and sleep, with a half-awake look of concentration on his face, his tongue toying at the corner of his mouth and the muscles of his arm flexing with every stroke. Watching him get himself off has only gotten hotter since you saw it the first time, and you didn’t think that was possible.

It feels like it takes all the effort you have left in your body, but you manage to sit up and turn to face him. In one assured move, you reach down to grab his wrist and pull his hand off his cock.

Yoongi whines a little at the realization of what you’re doing, and he leans back to give you full access as you settle yourself on all fours in front of him.

“Oh fuck yeah, please suck me off.”

“Please?” you laugh, pausing to glance up at him. “Who taught you manners?”

“That fucking mouth did,” he growls, and it’s punctuated with a relieved moan as you drag your tongue up his shaft. One of his hands tangles in your hair while you lick the heady taste of yourself off his cock, then breathe deep through your nose so you can swallow him down.

Yoongi’s breath comes in ragged pants as you hollow your cheeks around him and start to bob your head, letting his tip rub against the back of your throat on every pass. You feel his fingers in your hair tighten, and his hips shove up to match your strokes, like he’s already close to coming undone.

This thick cock weighs heavy and familiar on your tongue, warm like the rays of morning sun that have reached far enough into the room to wash over the bedsheets now. Drool spills out from the seal of your lips around Yoongi’s shaft, and the sound of him fucking your mouth is obscene, pornographic as it floats up to the ceiling.

“God,” Yoongi gasps. “Gonna come down your pretty fucking throat.”

And it’s funny— once, this would have made you feel powerful, in control, like the person with the upper hand. The winner. But in this moment, it occurs to you that you don’t really give a shit about winning anymore. Now his words just make you hum and suppress a smile around his cock in your mouth. When you notice the way his thighs tremble in response, you keep going, vibrating his length while you sink as far down as you can take it.

The hand in your hair releases, and then his palm just barely brushes over the bulge of his cock in your throat as if in admiration. Eyes rolling back, you let your jaw slacken and swallow hard on the stretch of him there.

“Jesus, fuck,” he groans, and then he’s coming, and the throb of him in your mouth still feels like a reward. You pull back a little to keep from gagging as he paints fat ropes of cum into the tight clutch of your throat. Sucking firmly around him through spasm after spasm, you swallow it all down greedily until you feel him going soft on your tongue. 

You finally pull off with a wet pop, dazed and laughing as you roll over and collapse into a heap against the mattress, thoroughly spent.

“Okay,” Yoongi manages to say on an exhale, though you can hear he’s still short of breath, too. You glance up to see him raking a hand through his hair, looking fucked out of his mind. “I’m ready to go win a Grammy now.”

There’s just enough time for each of you to shower and get dressed before a whole team of people arrive for Yoongi: stylists, hair and makeup, and most importantly, coffee delivery. Yoongi blinks wide-eyed at you as you press the largest iced Americano you could find in downtown Los Angeles into his hands, and then you step back to let everyone get to work.

Meanwhile, you spend the next few hours in a rush of attempting to get yourself ready, all while double-checking the schedule, answering emails on the fly from your phone, and trying desperately to ignore the anxiety that’s started to hum in the pit of your stomach.

Once your hair and makeup are as decent as you can get them, you slip the black dress you packed for tonight— a rental, because buying a black tie dress was absolutely out of your price range— off the hanger and step carefully into it. Watching yourself in the mirror, you reach behind you for the zipper only to realize you can’t quite manage to pull it up past the small of your back.

Fuck. You didn’t even think about the fact that Jimin helped you zip this thing up when you tried it on initially, during a night at your place where you split two bottles of wine and he performed his own personal critique of all your dress rental options. This was the only one he’d liked.

With a nervous sigh, you head for the bathroom door, figuring that you’ll be able to subtly grab the attention of one of Yoongi’s many stylists to help.

But when you slowly slide the door open, one hand pressing the fabric of your dress in place over your chest, you realize the room has fallen quiet. As you lean across the threshold, you see why: everyone is gone.

Except for Yoongi, who glances up from where he’s sunk into the couch, scrolling aimlessly on his phone.

“Where is everyone?” you snap, probably a little harsher than you need to be.

He frowns like he doesn’t understand the question. “They… left? Because they were done? I don’t know if you’ve heard, but there’s a big awards show tonight. Means the stylists are pretty booked today.”

Yoongi gets to his feet to cross the room, and you fumble awkwardly, trying to keep your dress up. He’s fully put together now in a well-fitted suit and tie, and with his long hair styled and subtle makeup applied to enhance his features, he looks… good. Too good. Deadly. You can’t quite manage to maintain eye contact, and find yourself staring dumbly at the floor instead.

His voice softens slightly as he steps in close to you. “What’s wrong? Does it not fit?”

“It fucking better,” you mutter. “I just… can’t reach the zipper.”

“Are you asking for my help?”

Your gaze flits up to meet his, and you’re a little surprised by his question. “There’s nobody else here,” you retort, stubborn.

When he blinks evenly back at you, like he’s waiting for something, you realize he’s not going to make this easy. Fucking hell. Another tense moment passes, and he just blinks again.

“Yes,” you finally give in with a frustrated sigh. “Will you please help me, Yoongi?”

“Turn around,” he murmurs, and you do.

His hand slides over the small of your back, and then he slowly starts to ease the zipper up. You don’t dare move a muscle until he’s done, and it’s only once he buttons the closure at the top that you breathe a serious sigh of relief. The dress fits like a glove.

You attempt to compose yourself enough to thank him, but the words get stuck in your throat when you feel the heat of his breath against your skin.

His low voice resonates in the quiet of the room as he leans in. “Was that so hard?”

You turn your head as if to argue, but then there’s a split second where you feel his lips brush over your neck, just below your ear. So slight it could’ve been an accident.

“Thanks,” you manage to choke out, and then you slip away from him to get your heels from the bedroom and try to remember how to breathe. You do your best to ignore the fact that your hands are shaking as you pull your shoes on, then pause in front of the full-length mirror on the wardrobe, giving yourself a final once-over.

As you smooth your hands down the black velvet fabric and turn to the side, you glance up to find Yoongi hovering in the threshold, watching you.

“That dress,” he remarks, sounding a little dazed. You have to fight to keep the smile off your face when he trails off, unable to say more— you didn’t think it was possible to make Min Yoongi speechless. It’s not a bad feeling.

And you do like this dress, even though you could never actually afford it. It’s simple but elegant, a sleeveless column style with a plunging neckline and a slit that reaches your mid-thigh. Nothing groundbreaking, but it sticks to your curves like water and makes you feel somewhat more like a person who belongs at a fancy awards show.

“Jimin picked it,” you respond, and you hear Yoongi exhale a laugh.

“He has good taste.”

You turn toward him as your hidden smile pulls into a smirk. “Well, I’m not dressed up for you,” you chide, and you revel in the way his face drops briefly in surprise before he’s able to conceal it. “I’m trying to meet Kendrick.”

“Is that right?”

“Uh-huh.”

You’re thankful that you purposefully padded your schedule with extra time, because you lose nearly every last minute of it stuck in the gridlock of Los Angeles traffic on the night of a huge event.

By the time you make it to the venue, you’re practically nauseous from all the stopping and starting and crawling of the car, and Yoongi looks equally bad, though you suspect his condition might be more anxiety-related.

As it turns out, the Grammys are a lot less glamorous when you’re only mildly famous, at least by American standards. The two of you are shepherded by security to another ‘lane’ of the red carpet and warned not to stop as you make your way into the building. You observe from afar while A-list celebrities pass in a blur, flashbulbs pop bright enough to blind you, and chatter is drowned out by the sound of fans screaming and the clamor of reporters trying to grab the biggest names for an interview.

“I’m so glad I’m not that fucking famous,” Yoongi scoffs, though he doesn’t quite manage to hide the nerves in his voice.

“Come on,” you murmur once you get inside, nodding toward a pop-up bar in a far corner of the lobby. “Take the edge off. And I’m gonna need alcohol if I have to sit through a fucking three-hour show.”

You down your drinks quickly, only a few minutes shy of the time by which you have to be in your seats, and you return from tossing the empties in the trash to see Yoongi eyeing a piano pushed against the far wall, clearly for show. He takes a seat, glancing around as if in fear of getting yelled at, then gently pushes up the key lid.

“Ooh, do Wine!” you tease with a laugh as you drop onto the bench beside him, but he actually does start to play, one foot pressing down on a pedal to keep the sound soft. His fingers alight over the keys, and the song he plucks out is beautiful. It’s a melody that almost feels nostalgic to you, even though you know you’ve never heard it before.

“What is this?” you ask, and he keeps playing as he responds.

“Do you know Sakamoto?”

You hum a no as you shake your head.

His eyes narrow slightly. “Remind me how you work in the music industry?”

A smile plays at your lips, and you roll your eyes. “Shut up. You know I’m a fraud.”

Yoongi doesn’t miss a note when he glances up to meet your gaze. “Are you?”

It’s only now that you realize how close he is: the two of you are basically sitting hip to hip, shoulder to shoulder. For a moment, you forget about the Grammys, forget that anyone else is even in the room.

“Excuse me!” A voice snaps you out of the moment, and you scoot away from Yoongi so quickly you nearly topple off the bench. “That’s not meant to be played, and we need everyone to head to their seats, please!” Your face flushes with an embarrassed heat, and Yoongi lifts a hand apologetically as he covers the keys back up.

You stick close to his side so as not to lose him in the large crowd of people. “Bet they’ll let you play whatever piano you want once you have one of those dumb little trophies,” you mutter under your breath, and Yoongi really laughs, like he wasn’t expecting the comment.

Another thing you didn’t necessarily anticipate: the Grammys are fucking long. You knew it would be over three hours, but you realize you severely underestimated how long that time would feel. While the performances are incredible (and you have to dig your nails into the cushion of your seat to keep from squealing when you spot Lil Nas X a few rows in front of you), there’s plenty of filler between them, and it feels a lot drier when you’re physically in the room for it. Even the commercial breaks are far too short for you to have enough time to actually run to the restroom or get another drink.

You’re also starving. “I hate that they don’t serve food at these things,” you hiss to Yoongi during a break, but it’s late enough in the night now that he’s barely speaking, apart from the occasional monotone grunt. 

Though you’ve been waiting for it all evening, you still don’t quite know if you’re ready when the host starts to run down the list of nominees for Song of the Year.

As he’s only credited as a writer, they don’t actually say Yoongi’s pseudonym, but pride still squeezes tight in your chest when you see “Suga” spelled out across the on-stage monitors beneath the name of the song.

They get through all the titles in what seems like less than a second, and your heart feels like it might give out as an anticipatory silence settles over the crowd. The host fumbles with getting the envelope open, and you’re so tense, you flinch hard at an unexpected brush of contact.

You glance down, and it takes a moment for your brain to process what’s happened. He’s not looking at you, hasn’t said anything, but Yoongi has nevertheless reached over to grab your hand. His long fingers lace through yours, gripping surprisingly tight, and the skin of his palm is warm and dry. It’s like your brain short-circuits for a moment as you stare stupidly at your joined hands, and he gives yours a single nervous squeeze.

“And the Grammy goes to…”

You look over at him, still dumbfounded, and then you hear them call a song that isn’t his.

Your heart sinks as you watch Yoongi blink up at the screen, his mouth pulled into a flat line. You realize belatedly you’re supposed to be clapping, but his hand is still clasped in yours. And you don’t want to pull away from him.

But then he moves first, untwining his hand from yours and bringing it up to rake through his hair with a disbelieving laugh. A little delayed, you both join in the applause as the winner makes their way to the stage. You can’t even process who it is.

You have no idea what to say to console him, so you don’t say anything at all.

Thankfully the category is one of the last of the night, so you only have to sit through a few more rounds of acceptance speeches and watching other people’s dreams come true before you can finally get to your feet. You feel like you can’t leave fast enough as you’re herded out of the stadium and into another car to depart for the afterparty.

There’s a heavy silence in the backseat that feels like a chasm between you as you crawl through Los Angeles traffic.

You realize there’s a bottle of champagne tucked into an ice bucket behind the front seat— a thoughtful touch from the label execs, you assume. Yoongi spots it at the same time you do, and he immediately reaches for it. With a grunt of effort, he pops the cork, a little bit of excess foam dribbling onto the floor of the car.

He raises his eyebrows at you, then brings the bottle right to his mouth for a long drink. Longer than long. You watch his adam’s apple jump in his throat as he swallows several times.

“Alright, chill the fuck out,” you snap after a few seconds, reaching over to grab it from him. “At least eat something first.”

“It’s my consolation prize,” Yoongi quips, but he lets you wrest the champagne from his hands without resisting. You take a thorough swig yourself, then recork the bottle and drop it back in the bucket. “Such a good little admin,” he purrs, and you try to convince yourself there isn’t a hint of venom in his words.

The car pulls to a stop at the designated hotel, and you climb out after Yoongi. Upon making it inside, the two of you peel off in different directions: him for the bar, and you to find anything that remotely resembles food. You keep glancing over at him from across the room as it fills with more and more people, nervous to take your eyes off him for too long, unsure of what he might do. Every time you find him again, it seems like he’s downing another glass of whiskey, drinking like the fucking world is ending.

Meanwhile, you’re struggling to find anything that isn’t kale, quinoa, or… whatever grain-free bread is. With a frustrated sigh, you finally decide to give up. If Yoongi wants to drink on an empty stomach until he gets alcohol poisoning, you figure that’s his fucking problem.

When you shove your way through the crowd back toward him, you find that he’s been pulled into a conversation with a bunch of older men you can only assume to be local industry reps. As you get close enough to make out their words, you quickly understand why he has such a sour look on his face.

“Song of the Year, huh? You know we can cross-reference the nominees and figure out if you’re full of shit, right?”

Yoongi grimaces politely into his drink as he throws it back, but you have no problem cutting in. “You’re actually speaking to an incredibly accomplished producer and songwriter,” you retort without thinking. “He has over 100 KOMCA credits.” You don’t miss the smirk Yoongi tries to conceal behind the rim of his glass.

“KOMCA?” Another one of them speaks up, the question paired with a harsh laugh. “Never heard of it. That anything like payola?”

“Wild that anyone can just buy their way into the industry these days.” The first man shakes his head, eyes scanning Yoongi up and down as if the tailoring of his suit tells him everything he needs to know. “Guess that’s the way the world works now. Never had to struggle a day in your life, huh?”

Your response is immediate and far too loud. “What the fuck is that supposed to mean?”

A loud laugh ripples through all of the men, clearly more excited about evoking a reaction than the gravity of their claims. “Wow, man,” the one who spoke first chortles, clapping Yoongi hard on the shoulder. “Looks like you need to control your girl.”

Your heart thuds in your chest as you watch Yoongi shrug off the guy’s hand to set his empty glass down on the closest table. He moves slowly, deliberately taking a long pause before correcting them. “This is actually my assistant.” His voice is laced with a deadly calm you know well.

“Assistant?” A third pipes up, acting as if he’s never heard the word before. “Huh. You know, back in my day we just called them secretaries. Or mistresses.”

Yoongi moves so fast you barely have time to process it, lunging forward and shoving the guy in the chest with enough force that he stumbles backwards into his shitty friends. “What the fuck!” one of them shouts, purposefully loud, and you can hear a ripple of shock roll through the crowd, can see heads turning to look your way in alarm.

“No, no, nope,” you immediately mutter. “This is not fucking happening.”

Yoongi is already taking another step toward the group, and you tighten a hand hard around his bicep. “We’re leaving.”

When he whips around to face you, the mixture of anger and pain reflected in his dark eyes is so overwhelming, it hits you like a truck. You try to force yourself to stay calm, because at least one of you has to be.

“Come on, Yoongi,” you say, letting your voice soften. “Fuck this place. I need some real food.” Your eyes search his, pleading. For a moment, you can’t help but wonder if you’re staring down an enemy or a friend.

But then you see the fight go out of him as he nods, and you breathe a silent sigh of relief.

Shifting the hand on his arm to press firmly to the center of his back, you guide him in front of you and wind through the packed room of people until you make your way outside again.

Fate does you one good turn by leaving an empty cab out front, and you push Yoongi into the backseat, then slide in next to him. You lean forward to greet the driver, doing your best to smile politely and act composed, like you didn’t just almost get into a fight at the Grammys afterparty.

“Can you take us to Koreatown, please?”

~*~

The cab drops you off outside a strip of bars and restaurants, lit up with neon signs in both English and Korean. To his credit, Yoongi seems more subdued as he follows you out of the car wordlessly, but you allow him a little more time to cool off in silence. You wander somewhat aimlessly, attempting to shake off your lingering anxiety in the warm evening air, until you stumble upon a food truck parked at the end of the block. Your eyes go wide at the posted signage.

“What do you think?” you ask as you turn to Yoongi, and he shrugs, like he really doesn’t care. Perfect. You’ve never had a problem a gamja hot dog couldn’t fix.

Securing one for each of you, you nod Yoongi toward a small group of tables set up at the curb to sit down. Once seated, you immediately drown your hot dog in ketchup and mustard, and you can hear him scoff before taking the bottles from you to do the same. Admittedly, you must look fairly ridiculous eating fried street food in full black tie, but you’re far too hungry to give a fuck right now.

It’s perfection from the first bite, crispy and hot, the batter studded with potato pieces and the inside loaded with cheese.

You’re also too hungry to bother making conversation at first, but after a few more bites you glance over at Yoongi, and your heart sinks all over again. You really do feel bad, and then the words are leaving your mouth before you can stop them.

“I’m sorry,” you murmur with your mouth full. “That you didn’t win.”

He makes a face as he chews. “We already agreed I wouldn’t have been happy even if I won, right? So it doesn’t really matter.”

You roll your eyes, unconvinced. “It’s okay to have feelings, you know. You’re allowed to be upset.”

Yoongi just shrugs, but he can’t quite meet your gaze. “It’s whatever.” You take another bite as he continues. “If I’m gonna win a Grammy, I want it to be for something that’s all mine anyway.”

The sentence surprises you, and you blink back at him. “You’re going to release your own stuff?”

As if he instantly regrets bringing it up, his face reddens a little, his expression twisting into an unsure grimace. “Ahh… I don’t know, probably not. People know me as a producer. I don’t know that anyone would actually listen to it.”

“I would,” you say without even really thinking, and his eyes widen. “You know,” you continue quickly, adopting a fake-serious tone. “Since I work in the music industry. Strictly business.”

A small smile plays at the corner of his mouth, and you find yourself relieved to see it. “I appreciate that.”

You’re also desperately curious, wondering if he’ll say more about his own music, but he goes quiet again. Given the night he’s had, you don’t exactly want to push it.

Taking the final bite of your hot dog and mourning the loss, you stack your skewer and paper tray on top of Yoongi’s, then get to your feet to toss them in the nearest trash can. When you return to the table, you smack your palms decisively against it.

“Come on. I think the circumstances call for some binge drinking.”

Your first stop is tucked into two seats at a neighboring dive bar, alive and roaring with enough ambient conversation that you have to speak fairly loudly to be heard over the noise. The bar in the center of the room is wrapped around a small open kitchen, where you watch the line cooks hustle to steam, grill, and fry what seems like a never-ending rush of food orders.

You and Yoongi stick to soju, pouring each other shot after shot. On the first one, he tilts his full glass toward you, and you knock yours against it.

“To losing,” he toasts, and you can’t help laughing as you tip your head back to drink. He’s smirking as he swallows his down, then pours you another. “Hey, maybe Jungkook will throw me a commiseration party when we get back.”

You grimace automatically at the name as you take the bottle from him to fill his glass up, and Yoongi doesn’t miss it. “Trouble in paradise?”

With a roll of your eyes, you determine that you need to be drunker for this. You take your shot, then instantly hold your glass out for Yoongi to pour another before he even gets to his. He obliges, and you throw it back immediately. The bottom of your glass hits the bar with a loud thud.

“I kinda… freaked out on him. Right before we left.”

Yoongi’s eyebrow lifts, questioning, as he drinks. “Any reason?” he prompts when he’s finished.

“Yes,” you answer stubbornly, tapping at the rim of your empty glass. He fills you up again, and you return the favor to finish the bottle. Yoongi motions to the bartender for another as you down your shot and steel yourself.

“You don’t have to tell me,” he offers.

“Don’t you want to hear that you were right?”

He shrugs like he can’t argue. “I mean, always.”

“Well for one, he asked if anything was going on between you and me.” You glance over to see Yoongi’s eyes widen slightly as he drinks. “I said no.”

“Uh huh.”

“And then he was like, ‘Good, I’m glad I don’t have to tell you to raise your standards.’”

Yoongi is clearly trying to keep his expression neutral, but it’s a losing battle. You can see the way his shoulders are starting to shake, and then he finally caves in, his palm smacking flat against the bar as he really laughs. “Wow,” he eventually recovers enough to huff, and you reach for the fresh soju bottle that’s been dropped off. “He really just said it.”

“Mm-hmm,” you intone, filling his glass and then handing the bottle back. Yoongi’s still chuckling a little as he pours your drink before taking his own, and you continue. “And then, I don’t know, there was some other stuff, and I was just like… oh fuck.”

“Because you realized he’s in love with you.”

You sigh dejectedly into your soju. “I’m so stupid.”

“Nah,” Yoongi shakes his head, reaching for your glass once you’ve emptied it again. “You wanted to avoid an inconvenient truth. Just makes you human.”

There’s a pause as you take the bottle to pour his drink, and then his next words nearly make you choke as you throw back yours. “You should date Jungkook.”

You’re sure you must look entirely dumbfounded as you stare at him. “What?”

“What?” he retorts, like he hasn’t said anything shocking. “He’d be good for you.”

For a long moment, neither of you speak as you regard him. You finally shake your head, nudging your empty glass toward him until he gets the memo. “Don’t say shit like that,” you mutter under your breath, and you’re not sure if he hears it over the din of the bar.

“Besides,” you continue as you snatch the soju out of his hands to pour his drink, “I’ve tried dating a coworker before. It’s a bad idea.”

“Sounds like a good story.”

“It’s not, really,” you murmur, staring down at the liquid in your glass. “My last job I was a waitress.”

“Mm,” Yoongi interrupts with a hum as he takes his shot. “Waitress. I was close.”

You pour him another, mostly to keep him quiet. “Yeah yeah, you’re very fucking perceptive. Anyway, I dated another server for a couple years. He ended up cheating on me with one of the hostesses, but I was honestly kinda tired of him, so I was glad to end it.” You hear Yoongi snort a little at your fairly heartless admission. “But then I walked in on them fucking in the walk-in, and it put me in a bad mood. Long story short, I ended up throwing a drink on a customer and they had to let me go.”

“Christ,” he laughs, pausing for a moment to fully take in your words. “And now you’re a pain in my ass.”

You roll your eyes as you motion for another soju bottle. “Correct.”

“Sounds like your ex was an idiot.” You glance over to find Yoongi already looking at you. “I mean, in the walk-in is just… nasty.”

“That’s what I said!” Your mouth pulls up at the corners as you try to suppress a giggle. “I don’t think we can really judge anybody though.”

Yoongi blinks, staring blankly into the middle distance. “That conference room trash can condom still haunts me.”

With a loud laugh, you bury your face in your hands, and you can feel your cheeks burning from alcohol and embarrassment. You peer between your fingers as Yoongi sets down a fresh shot for you, and you gladly take it.

“People are stupid,” he remarks wisely. “That’s why I don’t date.” You quirk an eyebrow as he passes you the bottle.

“What, a prize like you?” you deadpan. “You just fuck people in bar bathrooms like a well-adjusted human?”

“Yeah,” he admits with a shrug. “So. Wanna check this one out?”

Your mouth drops open in disbelief, and you immediately smack him on the arm. He nearly spills his drink from laughter, and you can’t keep yourself from laughing a little, too. “I already gave it to you this morning, you freak.”

“Come on,” Yoongi’s voice is teasing, and he bumps his shoulder against yours when he leans in closer. “I had a hard night.”

Pouring him another drink is your only distraction, and you do it with the utmost focus. “This dress is a rental.”

“I can pay for it.” The heat of his breath ghosts over your collarbone as he answers. You shove the bottle hard into his chest, and he takes the cue to fill your glass again, still smirking as he pulls away.

“First,” you say, sounding more confident than you feel, especially with the way your pulse has started to quicken. Your expression is deadly serious as you turn to stare into Yoongi’s eyes and he stares right back. “You have to prove that you can keep up.”

When you swallow your shot easily to punctuate the dare, a look flashes over Yoongi’s face like he’s impressed, and then he follows your lead.

After a few more bottles, the bar is so crowded and so loud that you can hardly hear yourselves think, and you stumble out of it and into the next place you see, and then the next, and then the next. All bets are off tonight, and you’re not about to tell Yoongi that he can’t get fucking trashed considering he just lost at the fucking Grammys. You figure you’ll be able to sleep off your hangovers on the stupidly long flight home tomorrow.

With each stop, Yoongi’s mood seems to improve a little. He eventually drinks enough that his suit jacket and tie come off, and they end up draped over your shoulders, despite your loud protests that you don’t need any more responsibilities. With the sleeves of his white button-down pushed up, it gets increasingly hard to divert your attention away from his hands and the muscles in his forearms, especially as you get progressively drunker and drunker.

Yoongi’s palm brushes over the small of your back as you make your way out of the last place, his touch warm even through the velvet of your dress.

“I know it was your personal nightmare,” he murmurs, words slurring together slightly, “but I really am glad you came on this trip. I mean it,” he insists when you shoot him a look. “I would be fucking insufferable if I was alone tonight. And I definitely would’ve punched that label guy in the face.”

You exhale a laugh and nearly fall over in your heels, and Yoongi’s hand slips to your waist to keep you upright. “He deserved it.” You lean into him, not entirely for balance, and you can feel it when he shrugs.

“Sorry you didn’t get to meet Kendrick.”

The glow of the various open-late establishments and the glitter of the pavement under your feet are all beautiful, especially in your current state, and the night air is still and warm. As you approach the next building and are met with the dull thud of music, your eyes go wide.

“Oh, I just figured out how you can make it up to me.”

The noraebang is surprisingly busy given that it’s a Sunday night, but you’re still able to book a room, and you giggle your thanks as Yoongi opens his wallet to pay the hourly rate like it’s nothing. The two of you work your way through more bottles of beer and soju, and when you start up the karaoke and teasingly pick the HEIZE song he produced, you’re surprised that he actually joins you.

Yoongi must be able to read the expression on your face, because he smirks mid-song. “Let the record show that I am actually a very fun drunk.”

And he is. You sing dramatically and loudly, not caring if you hit the notes, jumping and dancing and occasionally dropping passionately to your knees before dissolving into laughter. At first you monopolize the controller, but after you force a third Kendrick song on him Yoongi gestures for it, and you begrudgingly hand it over.

Crossing the room, you kneel down to dig through the provided box of props, immediately spotting and slipping on a cat-eared headband. You glance up at the screen, eyes widening as you realize he’s searching through Epik High songs. “Do Love Love Love!”

When you look back at him, Yoongi is squinting at you, laughing a little at your new set of ears. “What the fuck do you know about Epik High?”

“What do you mean what the fuck do I know?” you snap back. “I love them! I should be asking you that question, Mr. ‘I don’t listen to music’!”

His mouth pulls into a grin, his tongue toying at the inside of his cheek. “I have a few exceptions, alright?”

Still knelt down, you flop sideways onto the floor when he selects Born Hater. “Ugh, I’m too drunk to say that many words.”

“I got this,” Yoongi reassures you, flipping his microphone coolly with one hand as he gets to his feet. You can’t help giggling dumbly from your spot on the ground as you drunkenly prop your feet on the booth and reach up to pull your high heels off.

If there’s one thing tonight has taught you, it’s that Yoongi has a really good voice, even raw and live and drunk as hell. You don’t know why it surprises you, but it does. To you, performing seems like a different world from writing and producing tracks, but he does it just as effortlessly, with no trace of the anxiety you’ve seen grip him in a crowded room. The passion in the way he growls and gasps out lyrics, even just in the way he moves, it’s all undeniable and exhilarating to watch. He raps like he has nothing left to lose, mouth pulled into a snarl, occasionally reaching up to push his sweaty hair back off his forehead.

You can only gaze up at him, awestruck, wondering how many different versions of Min Yoongi you have left to discover until you hit the bottom.

The two of you trade the controller back and forth until every bottle on the table is empty, until the words blur on the screen, until Yoongi flops over to lay down in the booth with his head hanging off the edge, clearly exhausted. “No more,” he groans. “I’m so tired. And so drunk.”

Hovering above him, you pry the controller from his grip with a smile, slipping the cat ears onto his head for an even exchange. And then you get an idea.

“Last song!” you assure him as you type, and he groans even louder when Cat & Dog starts to play.

“God, this song is terrible,” Yoongi complains, but you’re singing too loud to care about his critiques.

With a severe amount of effort, he pulls himself to a sitting position, and you kneel down in front of him, miming cat paws with your hands and wiggling your hips. “I didn’t know you were into petplay,” he deadpans, and you stick your tongue out, determined not to let him ruin your fun.

You get to your feet and turn toward the screen as the second chorus finishes, yelling over your shoulder, “This is my favorite part!”

“Feel like Cinderella naega byeonae—”

When Yoongi’s voice suddenly reverberates from the other microphone, you almost drop yours. You whip around in complete disbelief. He’s on his feet and moving towards you as he continues the rap verse, the inarguable best part, with a renewed cocky energy. And you have to admit, he’s putting Yeonjun to shame.

“What the fuck!” you practically scream, but he just keeps going.

Seized by full-body drunk laughter, you stumble forward and nearly fall over, knocking into his chest. Though Yoongi’s reflexes are a little delayed, he still manages to right you without missing a word, one arm hooking around your waist. You swallow hard as you suddenly find yourself intimately close to the broad sweep of his collarbone, exposed between the top buttons of his shirt that came undone at some point during your debaucherous evening.

Fumbling for your microphone, you make it back to reality in time for the final chorus, only to fall entirely to pieces when Yoongi starts barking at full volume to match the outro. You can’t take it, and he’s not fast enough to keep you upright, so you drop straight down to the floor on hands and knees, laughing so hard it feels like your lungs might give out.

The microphone rolls dejectedly out of your grasp as you flop over onto your back, and you scrub your hands down your face, trying desperately to catch your breath as the song fades out.

“That was the best thing I’ve ever seen in my whole life,” you mumble into your palms. You uncover your face to look up at Yoongi, only to find him laughing down at you, still wearing the fucking cat headband. “I thought you hated that song.”

He rolls his eyes despite his smile. “Yeah, well, it was also stuck in my head for like a week after you played it that one night.”

You sit up with a dramatic glare. “Oh, you mean the night you stole my fucking keys?”

A proud smirk flickers over his mouth. “You know, I am sorry about that. Or at least sorry I couldn’t see the look on your face when you realized.” He tosses his microphone onto the booth bench next to his abandoned suit jacket, then reaches down with both hands to pull you to your feet. It belatedly occurs to you that you might’ve left his tie at the last bar, but you’re too drunk to give it another thought.

“I hate you so much,” you say, though you can’t quite keep your expression serious. “Fuck, I should’ve taken a video. Could’ve used it for blackmail.”

Yoongi’s voice is lower when he speaks again, and you’re suddenly very aware of how close to you he is, the fact that his hands are still closed over yours. “Guess you’re the only one who’ll ever know.”

“Mmm,” you hum, swaying a little where you stand. His palms slip to your waist to keep you steady as you blink up at him, and your hands flatten against his chest, your fingertips tracing over the buttons of his shirt. “You look good in cat ears.”

“Shut up,” Yoongi murmurs, and then his mouth is on yours.

Your hands reach up to tangle in his long dark hair, knocking the headband to the floor, and with the amount of alcohol currently coursing through your system, you don’t have a single inhibition left in you. You kiss Yoongi like you can’t fucking breathe without him.

He pulls you as close as he can, until your bodies are flush all the way down, and you don’t ever want it to be any other way. You want it just like this, sucking and nibbling at his bottom lip until his tongue licks your mouth open and you groan into him. Just like this: his palms moving down to grab your ass unapologetically, your grip on his hair tightening, even your teeth knocking together with how drunk and desperate you are for each other. Just like this: two stupid, wildly flawed humans in black tie attire, making out in a Ktown noraebang at two in the morning on a Monday.

The sound of the door opening might as well be a gunshot for how loud it feels, and you just barely manage to jump apart as an employee pokes their head in.

“Hey, we’re closing in five.”

You don’t realize you’re not breathing until you hear the door click shut again, and your gasp for air quickly turns into an overwhelmed, embarrassed laugh. Yoongi groans drunkenly, running a hand through his hair, then sighs out a long exhale, like he’s trying to calm down.

“Come on,” you giggle, still close enough to tug playfully at one of his belt loops. “Let’s get out of here.”

Thankfully a cab is still easy to flag down even this late. The two of you manage to pour yourselves into the backseat and give the driver the name of the hotel. It’s not a terribly long drive, and you watch wide-eyed out the window as the sprawl of Los Angeles rushes by, painted in neon glow and the amber wash of streetlights.

Yoongi slumps against you, and he goes quiet for so long you think he might be asleep. When he finally shifts again, he presses his face into your shoulder with a noise of discomfort, and you’re suddenly worried he might be silent for a very different reason.

“Yoongi,” you murmur, trying to keep your voice low. “Don’t puke in the cab.”

“Stupid,” he responds, and you figure he must not be doing that bad if he can still talk.

You run your fingers through the soft, dark strands of his hair, admiring the texture, the way it’s nearly long enough now to graze his shoulders. “What’s stupid?”

“I’m—” he tries, but the car dips over a pothole, and he’s talking so quietly you lose the rest.

“You’re what?”

It’s quiet for a moment, save for the click of the turn signal.

“In love with you.”

His words stun you where you sit, and you have no idea what to do, say, think. You just keep twining your fingers through his hair, like you’re stuck on auto-pilot, distantly aware that every alarm bell in your inebriated brain is going off. It feels like way too much to try and process any of it right now. It feels like a trap.

“We can talk about this tomorrow,” you finally answer. Yoongi just stays slumped against you, and he doesn’t say another word.

The cab drops you off at the hotel, and it’s quiet between the two of you as you get him up to the room. You feel like you’re watching yourself from a distance, and it’s like your brain isn’t processing any of this as really happening, as if to keep you from thinking too hard about the big picture. From what it all could mean.

In the bathroom, you stand over the sink as you lend Yoongi your makeup remover and you both brush your teeth.

“Contacts,” you remind him through a mouthful of toothpaste when he spits out the last of his, and he nods sleepily.

“You don’t have to… administrate me all the time,” Yoongi slurs as he carefully slips one lens and then the other out of his eyes.

You spit out your own toothpaste, then sigh as you rinse the sink clean. “Well, you’re very drunk, and it’s my fault.”

“It was fun,” he says quietly, fumbling the case closed.

“It was,” you echo. “Really.” 

The bathroom door is half-open on its sliding track, and you glance up in the mirror to see Yoongi hovering in the threshold, looking back at you as you wipe away stray traces of mascara from under your eyes. You think he’s going to leave, but then he steps in behind you again, and you feel his hand slide up the small of your back to ease the zipper of your dress open.

Something in your heart twists as you stare down at the marble counter, and you can already tell this isn’t meant to be flirtatious. That thought is confirmed when you finally look up, only to find yourself left entirely alone.

With a small sigh, you slide the bathroom door shut, then flip the switch to turn on the fan. The white noise still doesn’t feel like enough, so you run the shower as well, then grab a plastic water bottle from the counter to chug. You retreat into the far corner with your phone, scrolling until you find the name of the only person who can possibly help you right now.

“Hey babe,” Jimin answers on the third ring. “I’m at rehearsal so I really can’t chat. You good?”

“Yoongi said he loves me,” you answer immediately, and the reality of it hits you impossibly hard as soon as you say it out loud.

“Uh-oh.”

“But,” you lean back until your head knocks against the wall. “He’s drunk as shit. I— we are drunk as shit.”

There’s a pause, and you swear you hear Jimin laugh a little under his breath. “He really said it, huh?”

“Yes, Jimin,” you groan. “In love.”

“And?”

You grimace at the flippant response from your supposed best friend. “What do you mean and?! What the fuck am I supposed to do?”

“Well, that depends,” Jimin starts.

“On?” you snap, impatient.

“Have you realized you’re in love with him yet? ‘Cause if I have to hear you babble on about this man for another week without piecing it together, I really might lose it.”

His words actually make your stomach churn. “Jimin!”

“I—” he sounds like he’s preparing to explain himself, but then he pauses, and his voice is quieter when he speaks again. “Fuck, I’m getting yelled at. I gotta go. Call me tomorrow.”

You want to scream at him to stay, to help, that he can’t just unravel you like this and then leave you to figure it out for yourself. “Mochi, I’m on the fucking plane tomorrow—”

“I’ll come over when you get home!” Jimin interrupts. “And then you can tell me the entire story of you two finally figuring out how to be normal humans with feelings.” You scoff at his biting remark, but he’s already talking over you. “You’re smart, you got this, I love you!”

You hear him blow a dramatic kiss into the speaker, and then the line goes dead.

The world spins around you as you stare helplessly at the silent black screen of your phone, and you can’t shove it all down anymore. It’s overwhelming, all of the things that you’re feeling in this moment, so much so that you can’t even identify what you feel. It’s just a giant, tangled mess, in your brain and in your heart. The tears spill out like you’ve been holding them in for weeks, hard and fast, until you can scarcely catch your breath. You scrub at the first few that roll down your cheeks, but they continue relentlessly, and you eventually give up and just let it all pour out.

You don’t know how long you stay like that, crying on the bathroom floor. You can’t even really explain why you’re crying, except that everything inside of you feels like too much to handle.

There’s a dull ache in your head by the time you finally manage to cry yourself dry, and then you peel yourself off the floor to slip out of your dress and shut off the shower. You pull on the tank top and sleep shorts you’d grabbed earlier from the bedroom, trying to avoid your swollen face in the mirror as you turn the lights out and shut the door behind you.

Yoongi has left the lamp on your bedside on, and you immediately flip it off to plunge the room into darkness, not wanting him to see you like this. He stirs slightly when you slip under the covers, and you can feel the mattress shift as he turns over.

Like it’s the most natural thing in the world, his arm slides over your stomach to pull your body flush to his, and his lips brush at the join of your neck and shoulder. As confusing as it should be, there’s something about the weight of him pressed into you that relaxes you, even through your current haze of emotion. You allow yourself to sink back against him, to breathe deeper, though your inhales are still a little shaky.

Yoongi’s rough voice in your ear pulls you up from the edge of sleep. “Did I fuck everything up?”

You sniff softly, and your own reply is barely more than a whisper. “No, Yoongi, it’s okay. Let’s just sleep."

As you hear him settle in beside you again, you make a promise that you’ll deal with the fallout tomorrow. You’ll figure out how you really feel, and how he does, and what you want, and what the hell you’re supposed to do about it all. But tonight, you just want this: to lay here with Yoongi and pretend your entire world isn’t about to change when you wake up.

chapter eight | masterlist | chapter ten

A/N: oh hiiiiii, super secret bonus author's note down here!!! just wanted to share that, now that we're officially through the grammys, that means we are down to just two more chapters left in the series!!! i held off confirming the full length of LDOMLT until we got to this point (and honestly i could've easily split this into two chapters but i am NICE and i did not give you the WORST CLIFFHANGER OF ALL TIME LMAO) - but now i'm sure. chapter 11 will be the final one. gonna do my best to get 10 and 11 up before end of year, or by very early 2023 at the latest!!! and thank u, as always, for reading 💜💜💜

#yoongi smut #yoongi angst #yoongi x reader #bts fanfic #bts x reader #look down on me like that

[charmixpower]

Musa ia the only one (i think) who changed her hairstyle thoughout the show. What is your opinion about the other winx what hairstyle will suit them best.

Uhh?? Like which hairstyles look best and how I'd like to see their hair develop through the seasons? Sure

WOW making Bloom's hair wavy is objectively correct

That aside, high low styles and braids. That's what Bloom really vibes in. Something about Bloom and braids I cannot explain it but it looks beautiful and the high low styles just may h Bloom's vibes

Leaving Bloom's bangs letting them be weird is 20/20 Bloom. Yes Bloom cuts her own bangs, how could you tell. She loves her insane bangs

Bloom just rocks braids too. Small decorative braids that wrap around her head and the full on braids. Both look amazing on her

Messy buns are also perfect for Bloom. Matches her art kid vibes perfectly, real buns are great for when she's trying to be fancy. Fancy Bloom with a small bun is always super cute. Nothing can contain her weird girl energy

I wish WOW Bloom had her weird ass bangs, then we could have wavy hair classic Bloomy hair

Stellas classic bangs look like she has normal straight bangs with hella frayed edges in a vampire cut at best and I hate them. I refuse to believe that Stella has vampire cut bangs, I simply close my eyes when I see it

I am VERY biased to any hairstyle that gets rid of them, and also curtain bangs Stella supremacy

I also think Stella looks better without those two super long stands of hair hanging over her shoulders, I like the s5 ones a lot

Aside from that Stella's hair looks best when it's down, but because that's boring this is mostly a complication of bang styles I like on her with one example of Stella nomral hair

Also mixed kid Stella, her hair is naturally curly or has the ability to curl naturally. I am biased and I like to see her hair with some volume yess

The s4 Stella look is mostly there because it's just a beautiful way to put her hair up for like sleep and stuff where she'd want her hair out of the way and it's one the Stella hairstyles of all time

The beach look is here because it actually made me forget how much I hate her pointy bangs. Her hair is windswept 💕💕💕 beautiful, the bun is a cute touch as well

That's all. Stella loves her long hair and gets p fuckin upset whenever someone fucks with it and does like everything to maintain it. Stella literally would only cut her hair under threat of death, and she likes having it down. Her hair says down XD the only thing that would change is her bangs

When they get weird with Flora's bangs it's always a win. Like yes bitch let her bangs do as they please, mix them up yesssss. Also big yes to any hairstyle that draws attention to her bangs, like hair decorations, and while I'm not sold on that headband it does make her bangs stand out more so ig it can stay

Flora looks best when her hair is left to roam wild or tied up tight. It's either giving boho queen letting her hair be all flowy and gorgeous, or "I'm gardening and I'm not getting dirt in my hair" and both fit her amazingly

The Sirenix low ponytail is just so slay. It's so messy and flowy and free and it gives a casual nature lady energy. It's such a chill beautiful look that really should have been in a civilian form instead but like whatever

I'm usually against high ponytail Flora, but the flowers and pearls in her hair save that look and help it ascend. Gorgeous. We love it

The s4 and s6 buns are so cute. Gardening hair and date hair respectively

Flora's Believix hair is THEE Flora hair. I'm sorry but it is. Superior to Flora's Enchantix hair. The flowers fit her so much better than pearls and gems and I don't think Flora would get super fancy with her hair in the first place. This is just Flora

Flora also should have cut her hair in s4. It would be cute

Dyed hair, choppy bangs, messy hair, slicked back hair, weird HUGE bangs, keep it weird, keep it short, keep it Tecna baybeeee

Also hats. Hats also fuck but I can't see them being a every day thing for her

It would be really fun if she cut and shaved her hair in different styles as hair evolution but I'd accept her dying her hair differently every season

Musa looks best with her hair up. Especially with her long hair because it makes it look like her hair is shorter while also giving her hair more options. I especially like her s5 hair of the bun with the hair down and the sleep hair loopys. While I wouldn't make the sleep hair loopies her civilian look it is a natural evolution of her pigtails into a new long hair style while still keeping the original style (tho it needs to lose the side strands, the shorter strands work better when her hair is visibility long and this makes them look short so axe em)

Hats as well, Musa looks good in hats. Musa only got to wear one hat in the original series, and she wore it over her pigtails because she's very silly, but more hats and a hat in her civilian design would absolutely be a win to me

Okay now stuff that only applies to her long hair:

The long low pigtails are slightly more tomboish than the long high pigtails but if you have her an undercut that would fix that

The s4 long hair looks like shit, that isn't Musa, yada yada yada, if your going to do long hair down Musa do it like S7. Would Musa ever wear any of that, especially the earrings? God no. Does it at least look like something an older Musa might wear? Replace the head band with headphones, and yeah maybe

WOW Musa got the memo. Also that hairstyle is like her s5 one except the bun doesn't lead into a pointy tail, instead it's a half up half down style. It's cute, but it's mostly there to show how headphones can replace a headband

There are a lot of examples of how to make long hair Musa look less bad and that's because there are no images of short hair Musa in anything but her pigtails and I'm cranky about it

Messy bangs, high ponytails, and fashion only hats

S6 is a crime against humanity but look at her hair godblessss. The s5 and s3 hats are cute and yes Aisha only wears hats for fashion unlike Tecna who wears them for a purpose, and Musa who wears them for both

Messy bangs just work with Aisha. Her whole thing is that she was overly stifled and expected to act in a very particular way and as soon she got away she refused to control her flyaways and bangs. She will not, fuck y'all, she got shit to do that isn't worrying about her hair

High ponytails also work like hell. High ponytails are just yess. They have a very "I got shit to do, and I need to do it yesterday." Vibes that fit Aisha's dedication and drive perfectly

Mixing the two gives this very amazing vibe. They tried to accomplish this in s4, but did not but they did manage to get it in s6 which is hilarious. It gives the vibes that she needs to do something but not as urgent, shes still having fun

I also love how her Royal hairstyles are the high pointytail too, it shows how the main thing she got from all those classes is how to be goal oriented. I love that for her, she threw away all the sexist nonsense and kept the work ethic, she's so awesome. In reverse it also shows how dedicated she is to her people, how keeping them safe and happy is her goal, love thattt

#winx club #winx musa #winx bloom #winx stella #winx flora #winx tecna #winx aisha #winx layla #asks #rus chatters

[tngrace]

Trick or Treat

For: @angstchaos for the @topguntrickortreat fic exchange. This was such fun & I hope you enjoy it. A03 link; TG/M Masterlist

The first year after Nick was hard for all holidays, but Mav made sure to put extra effort into them for Bradley since he was at home teaching at TOPGUN. He knew the kid might not remember them since he was still so young, but still he tried. Two years after Nick though, it came easier. Bradley was so excited any time he got to see his Uncle Mav, but he especially loved the holidays and all the effort Mav put into them.

Halloween had to be his favorite though. Uncle Mav would help him with his costume, and Bradley was even able to convince Uncle Mav to dress up with him. His mom always tried to get Mav out of it, but when Bradley turned those big puppy dog eyes on him, Mav was a goner. He could never tell the kid no, and Bradley knew it.

This year, though, it was supposed to rain on Halloween which was rare. They were saying it could even storm. Carole was trying hard not to ruin Bradley's enthusiasm over Halloween, but trick or treating or any Halloween activity for that matter appeared as if it wasn't going to happen. She knew she'd have one upset little boy at that. Mav was due back into town the week before Halloween, and she knew once he arrived and saw the weather, he'd be just as disappointed as her son.

"Mama is Uncle Mav here yet?" Bradley asked her for the hundredth time, even though he'd only been home from school a short time, on Monday before Halloween.

"Is he standing here?" she teases.

Bradley shakes his head with a pout. "Don't worry little bird. He'll be here. Uncle Mav never breaks promises."

"I know," Bradley sighed before he went back to the window to wait and watch. He already had his costume idea ready to present to Uncle Mav, and he just knew his uncle was going to love it. It was another hour before the roar of a motorcycle could be heard rolling into the driveway. Bradley raced from his room to the front door, barely stopping before crashing through it. Carole just shook her head with a laugh.

Bradley jumped at Mav as soon as he started opening the door. "Woah!" Mav laughed dropping his bag as he caught his godson. "Someone has grown a foot since I saw him last!"

"You haven't grown any," Bradley teases.

Mav pretends to be offended before he starts a tickle attack on the six year old. Bradley shrieks and giggles in between trying to beg Mav to stop. "Take it back," Mav threatens with more tickles until Bradley relents. Mav pulls him back up right and Bradley hugs him tight. "I missed you too kiddo," Mav whispers. He finally makes it all the way into the house to greet Carole, Bradley staying in his arms.

Once Mav gets settled, Bradley brings up Halloween. "I already know what my costume is going to be."

"Tell me," Mav smiles.

"I gonna be an ava'tor like you Uncle Mav."

Mav sees Carole freeze, and he knows he'll have to come back to that later, but he gives Bradley a full smile. "Oh yea? We'll have to go find you a mini flight suit."

"And jacket!"

"Jacket?"

"Yea. Like the one you wear. I want one with all the patches too!"

Mav chuckles as he ruffles Bradley's hair. "Ok Baby Goose. We'll see what we can do."

"Bradley you know we've talked about the weather. You know you might not get to go," Carole warns from her spot on the couch.

Bradley turns his eyes to Mav. "We can still go if it's raining, right Uncle Mav?"

"We'll just have to see Baby Goose." Mav ruffles his hair and tries not to let Bradley's pout go to his heart. "But!" Bradley perks up at that, making Mav smile once more. "I promise it'll still be a really fun Halloween."

"Promise?"

"Always!"

Bradley's smile returns once more and he tells Mav all the things he's planned out for them to do while Mav is in town for the week, not realizing Mav's keeping a surprise from him.

Leading up to Halloween is sunny and hot, so the boys stay out a lot. They get supplies for his costume, managing to find a flight suit and a leather jacket, much to Bradley's delight. Mav gets some extra patches from base and Viper, who is more than happy to see Bradley when Mav takes him to visit. Once they have his costume together, they find corn mazes and fall activities to keep them busy during the afternoon after school, and at night before bed they watch Halloween movies until Bradley falls asleep.

"Mav, you know if it's raining you can't take him out. Houses won't be passing out candy or anything," Carole reminds two nights before Halloween.

"I know. Don't worry Carole. I've got a plan," Mav reassures.

She just gives him a skeptical look and shakes her head. "We should talk about his costume too."

"What about it?" Mav asks puzzled.

"Pete," she sighs putting down the blanket she'd been knitting. "Bradley cannot become an aviator. I don't want him in the Navy. Ever."

"Carole he's just a kid. He doesn't know what he's talking about. Besides it's Halloween. It's just a costume."

"I mean it Pete. Don't ever forget it either. Bradley is not going to be in the Navy. He looks up to you so much, and he wants to be just like you. You can't let that happen."

Mav concedes to keep the peace, but he's worried about her.

The next day, is cloudy and dreary and they spend all day in the house. Mav and Bradley spread decorations from one end of the house to the other. It honestly looks like Halloween threw up in there, but Carole doesn't have the heart to ruin their fun. Mav helps Bradley make Halloween themed cookies later that night after supper and before bed he lets him in on a little secret.

"I've got a surprise for you tomorrow buddy."

"A surprise?" Mav chuckles at how much Bradley perks up, even as Mav tucks him into bed.

"Yep. A surprise. Should be here when you wake up in the morning ok?"

"I'm going to sleep right now Uncle Mav I promise." He slams his eyes shut and Mav chuckles once more.

"Sweet dreams Baby Goose," Mav whispers as he places a soft kiss on Bradley's forehead. He tucks the covers around him and switches on his nightlight before he heads out.

Carole is in the kitchen cleaning up and Mav joins her. "I have a surprise Care."

"What have you done now, Trouble?"

"Nothing bad I promise," he laughs. "The Flyboys get in tonight. Don't worry they've got rooms booked. But they're excited to see you and Bradley and spend Halloween with us."

"Oh wow! Pete! How did you manage this?!"

"Ice did it," he shrugs. "Said they'd love to spend the holidays with us this year."

"Bradley's going to love it." They finish cleaning up for the night and tuck into bed, knowing tomorrow will be wild.

Bradley is up at five am, jumping on Mav's bed. Mav pulls him down beside him, chuckling as Bradley whines at being held down. "Is too early Baby Goose."

"Na uh! You promised a surprise when I woke up!"

Mav tucks Bradley in beside him and brushes the hair off his forehead. "You were supposed to wake up at a normal hour kiddo. Not early. Your surprise will be here soon."

Bradley pouts but concedes to lay there with Mav for a little longer. They get up around six and go to make Halloween pancakes and bacon for breakfast. Just as they're finishing the breakfast there is a knock at the door. Bradley turns big eyes to Mav, knowing it's way to early for anyone to be coming to visit his mom.

"Is that my surprise?"

"Let's go find out," Mav laughs, as Bradley races to the door. He at least remembers all the safety talks Carole had given him and waits for Mav to open it.

"I hear there's a little goose around here needing a squad for trick or treating," Ice says when Mav swings the door open. Bradley squeals in delight and throws himself at Ice.

"Uncle Mav you got everybody here?!"

Ice carries Bradley in and the rest of the flyboys follow. "Nope kiddo. That would all be your Uncle Ice."

Bradley hugs Ice tight offering a very quiet thank you in his ear before he gets passed around to the others for hugs. "I thought I heard chaos," Carole smiles as she joins them.

"That's all we ever bring," Wood smiles before Carole gets her own round of hugs.

Once Bradley has made it all the way around the room for attention he reminds Mav he's hungry. Mav chuckles as he makes up plates for everyone, Bradley helping him and dutifully passing them out to all his uncles.

After breakfast, Bradley models his costume, including his mini replica jacket, and the Flyboys all ooohh and ahhh over it, making Bradley beam.

"Are you sure you need that jacket too Baby Goose?" Slider teases.

"Yes! It's just like Uncle Mav's!"

"He's just teasing you kiddo," Mav laughs as he ruffles Bradley's hair.

The rain started mid-morning and by lunch Bradley was pouting. Carole was insisting they couldn't take him trick or treating in the rain because he would get sick, but none of the uncles could stand the pout. "What if we just took him to base?" Mav poses.

"Most of the offices do have candy," Ice agrees.

"I'm sure we could swing by Viper and Jester's as well," Wood throws in.

Between all of them they come up with a solid plan, and Carole just lets them. She's learned there's really no point in trying to dissuade them once they set their minds to something. Plus, they'd do anything to make Bradley happy no matter what anyone says.

Mid-afternoon, they load Bradley into Wolfe's truck and head to base. It's a tight fit but with Carole wanting to stay home out of the rain, they make it work. Once on base, they hit up all the offices they know will have candy for Bradley, and all the officers praise Bradley's replica flight suit. Once they've made their rounds there, they head to Jester's house first.

"Just make sure you don't act like your Uncle Mav," Jester teases Bradley when he sees the kid dressed just like his uncle.

"Promise!" Bradley smiles.

He gets more candy and treats and spoiling at Viper's house. Mike and his wife both doting on the kid, and insisting on a picture of all of them since Bradley had convinced them to wear their flight suits too. Mike had told them of some houses in his neighborhood that were still passing out candy, so after leaving his house, they made a few more stops before Bradley was almost passed out. Slider was currently carrying the kid and he was nodding off.

"Think he had fun anyways?" Mav asked Ice as they were heading back to the truck.

"I think the kid has a blast any time he gets to spend with you Mav. We were just extra bonuses."

"Yea. I hope so."

"What's really going on?"

Mav sighs as he turns to Ice. "You read me too well."

"Job hazard." Mav knows it's more than that, but he doesn't call him on it. Ice raises his eyebrow at Mav to quit stalling.

"I think something's going on with Carole. She hasn't acted like normal this time. And..." He chews on his lip as he remembers their conversation about the costume. "She wasn't happy with B's costume this year. Made sure I knew he would never be in the Navy."

"Sounds like maybe you need to talk to her. We could take Bradley out tomorrow?"

"Yea. I'll run it by her when we get back." With a plan in place, and Bradley passed out on Slider they headed back to the house. The next day Bradley declared it the best Halloween ever because he had all of his favorite people in one place at one time. Mav never was able to work anything out with Carole over her fears of Bradley being in the Navy. They all tried at some point, but her mind was made up. 

Bradley never did know that every year he dressed up like his Uncle Mav, Carole became more and more concerned about him following in his uncles' footsteps. It wasn't until the big fight, the years of silence, and the reunion and explanation did he ever understand why Halloween was never Carole's favorite holiday. It was always a reminder of what she'd never be able to stop.

Looking back, Bradley realizes that the Halloween it rained was probably his best Halloween ever, and he hoped one day his uncles would help him make Halloween the best for his kids as well. 

#my writing #bradley rooster bradshaw #pete maverick mitchell #Halloween fic #topguntrickortreat2023 #top gun trick or treat 2023 #fic exchange #top gun fic

[transenbyconfessions]

TW for menstruation.

I've been giving more thought to all the small things that weren't obviously signs that I may be non-binary that I've felt since I was very young and consistently held. I never had the language for how I felt back then. Realising how some of what I thought and felt probably had a bit of dysphoria along with the other reasons, is comforting but also sad.

The main one for me, who was AFAB, was they ever since I was young I never wanted children. It was something I was very, very clear about. But as this was primary school it was put down as that I was just a child and all girls grow up to have babies so you'll meet a man and change your mind. I'm 39 now, I still do not want children. I know a lot of my reasons are because I simply don't want to, it would cause me some physical problems, I couldn't afford to anyway but what I didn't realise as a child because I found, and still find expressing my feelings difficult, is that the whole idea disgusts me. I'd be changing in a way that I don't want. I hated it when I started my period because even although we had been told all about that at school, I never really connected that also included me. And when they did show up, Mum got all weird about it. I didn't understand why she got so proud and at the same time, ashamed enough that she just gave me these awful pads and not told what to do with them or how to look after myself. The whole teenage female experience and growing up into a woman wasn't something I ever connected with. It was a performance because I have a certain body that is capable of certain things. As a girl, as a woman in order to be accepted you should dress a certain way, behave a certain way. I didn't hate my body but I never felt comfortable in it, not entirely.

As I joined the military, I loved the gym. I worked out, tried to gain muscle as much, as I could. But I was way more feminine because the other women were, the women's uniform trousers were so stupid and I wasn't big enough to get the much smarter men's ones. I wanted to fit in. I cut my hair short but people always mistook me for a man in a nasty mocking way. Weird as it sounds, when I deployed and a local man addressed me with none of that, I wasn't upset because what he saw was a person with short hair, my chest hidden under my baggy shirt. It always upset me when people were snide and I wasn't even trying to pretend I was a man, I was just being myself. I dont suit long hair anyway!

Workouts almost became a bit of an obsession. It wasn't just about being fit for the work but with how I looked and I guess that was a bit of dysphoria I wasn't aware of because I didn't want a typical feminine shape.

I left, returned to civilian life and because I no longer felt the need to fit in with everybody else, I slowly dressed less feminine. I still wear some things but that's because I want to. It's just being me not presenting in a way I think others will accept. I thought about how I identified and that I never really felt like male or female fit or described me. I never had a sense of what it meant to be a woman. But neither can I say the same for man. I like being free with dressing in a way I like regardless of how masculine or feminine it is. I do think about if top surgery would be a good thing for me, just family would have a problem with it. I don't know if I'd go on T, I got used to the fact that I have periods. But I have short hair and nobody mocks me for it or say snide things about it. In fact if people can't tell which I am, that makes me happy. That's sometimes the point; I don't want to be viewed as either. I use they/them pronouns. I want to change my name to a non-feminine one. Being seen and accepted as a non-binary person means the world to me.

It took me so long to understand but I finally feel like I know and feel more at home with myself simply for understanding why I felt the way I did when people probably knew bit didn't want to face that they don't have a daughter but still a loving child.

#menstruation #transgender #trans #enby #nb #nonbinary #non-binary #non binary #dysphoria #gender dysphoria #childfree #military

[maristocratie]

Some of my Hacketteers headcanons p3

Again I apologize in advance for the spelling mistakes, English is not my mother tongue, I will try to do my best !

Enjoy the reading :)

Max :

Max often loses or forgets his keys. Whether it's his car keys or apartment keys. It drives Laura crazy.

He checks very often that he doesn't stink. He also hates having dirty hands or the feeling that they are dirty.

He can't have a full beard. So he stick to his well shaved face. Besides, Laura finds him more attractive this way. She says she likes his « baby » face. She often teases him about it by saying that he is adorable this way which tends to annoy him. He never stays upset for long because it's Laura.

Max is a city dweller while Laura likes the countryside more. Besides, as soon as they will be able to afford it, Max would like to buy a loft in the city because it's more practical but also because he doesn't want to find himself in a lost place far from everything after what happened (but he never told Laura for several reasons). On her side Laura wants to buy an old house that they would renovate together because it's something important for her. Moreover, he knows that she would like to have animals and that they would not be as happy in an apartment as in a house with space.

Laura :

Laura is so focused on her studies that when she's studying she easily forgets to eat. Max often reminds her to hydrate and eat. He brings her little snack during the day because he knows she won't take a real break until the evening. And in the evening she takes the time to really eat with him (if she tries to skip dinner Max comes to get her in her room and drags her to the dining table).

I don't know why but I can imagine Laura at 7-8 years old with short hair wearing a black and pink flannel (very horse girl energy).

Jacob :

Jacob is a heavy sleeper. He snores you can't tell me otherwise.

For Halloween Jacob dresses up as a cowboy and is totally rocking it. Just like Max, he loves country music. For the disguise he lets his moustache grow and the worst of it is that it suits him.

Emma :

Unlike Jacob she is a very light sleeper and wakes up at the slightest sound.

Emma has 3 siblings, 2 older sisters and 1 older brother. She is the youngest. She has been in competition with her brother and sisters since she was a child. All the children are beautiful and were popular at school. the competition between them is not explicitly nasty but sometimes it is just brutal I don’t know really how to explain it. Emma's brother is the most gentle with her and is close to her while her sisters are more distant and less gentle with her. In spite of everything, they love each other and help each other when the going gets tough. Like If one of the children is struggling, he or she will not ask for help. But the others will help without the need to talk about it. They don't like to talk about their weaknesses.

Nick :

Nick follows Jacob in the cowboy costume for Halloween except he doesn't grow a mustache. Iconic cowboy duo.

Ryan :

Ryan has small feet I don’t make the rules.

He wears overalls.

Dylan :

Dylan has a lot of moles especially on his back and shoulders.

He’s like Laura once he’s focused on something he will not let go until he is done. When he´s studying for exams he will not do anything else until he is finished studying. Just like Laura, he easily forgets to eat and is able to fall asleep on his table because he wasn't finished studying. The same is true when he is fixing something until it is perfectly fixed he will continue. He´s extremely persistent.

He often carries a Swiss Army knife with him. You never know, it might come in handy. Sometimes he just uses it to keep his hand busy.

Part 4?

#dylan lenivy #the quarry #headcanon #max brinly #laura kearney #jacob custos #emma mountebank #nick fucillo #ryan ezrahler

[maybeiamspooky]

I actually like my dreams, which most times are strange, and also sometiMES CRUEL BECAUSE TBEY LEAVE ME ON CLIFFHANGERS THAT I'LL PROBABLY NEVER GET TO KNOW THE END OF. >:(

I LITERALLY HAD LIKE THIS SUPER COOL DREAM WHERE I WAS WATCHING CRIMINAL MINDS, EXCEPT IT WAS AN EPISODE THAT DOESN'T EXIST, SO NOT ONLY CAN I NOT LIKE REWATCH IT AND APPRECIATE ALL THE DETAILS AND SHIT, BUT MY DREAM ENDED ON A *FUCKING CLIFFHANGER*. LIKE, OF ALL TIMES TO WAKE UP, *THEN*???

Y'ALL I DEFINITELY DON'T WAKE UP THAT EARLY IN THE MORNING, LIKE EVER

------------------------------------------------------

The dream, if y'all wanna know:

So there was this case about these k-ll-rs that were nicknamed 'The Highway K-ll-rs' by the media probably, and it took place during Reid's "jesus hair era". I think it's most likely sometime during season 6, but I have literally no clue, so yeah.

Unfortunately I don't remember a lot, but I do remember that at some point JJ was in front of a like tall city-type glass building looking for evidence on a cr-me scene in front of it on the like cement in front of it like that made like a street but like not one for cars but just for people??? I don't know how to describe it, the best word I can come up for is courtyard but thats definitely not it, and I'm pretty sure it's not considered a sidewalk because it's like too large of a space, I really hope y'all understand what I mean. (plaza??? I DONT KNOW ;-;)

But so anyways, then it skips around a bit, but two of the unsubs actually got caught, and they were in an interrogation room but like, not the typical one in Quantico even though I think they were there?? Also they were in the same room, and like there was like multiple big windows that showed the hallway (two ways) or something so I'm not quite sure if my dream right then is even set in Quantico? So the unsubs both actually like talk freely about what they did. And also at some point for some reason Penelope goes in to talk to them and she's really upset, like yelling/lecturing them almost in tears kind of upset, and then at some point she ends up leaving, idk.

However, this is where my dream gets a *plot twist*. There were actually two more unsubs, a woman with pixie-cut-short blonde hair and a man, and they hadn't been in the profile, so they all thought everything was over. After k1lling a security guard, they somehow got into the BAU completely undetected with weapons after that.

I remember seeing like a shot of Hotch, Reid, and Morgan in some office like facing away from the door, but I'm not exactly sure where that fits in the timeline of this dream episode?

So the two secret unsubs hold (at least) Hotch at g-npoint and have him take off his suit jacket for some reason, and also I think(?) put like a towel in his mouth or smth, and they were k1dn-pping him. Yeah, turns out he was their target all along I'm pretty sure, and the two unsubs that had gotten themselves caught had done it on purpose.

Aaaand thats it. That is where it ended. :')

#criminal minds #dream

[justafairytailofinnocence]

Hi!!! Here's the 'about me' for the star wars ship, and thank you so much for having these open, you're amazing!! :)

Okay okay so:

My name is Jessica, i'm 20, and i'm bi so you can ship me with a male or a female character :) [I haven't seen all the star wars animations only season 1 and i've started season 2 of the clone wars but I haven't seen the whole show or like I said any of the other animations :) ]

I'm 5'1 so i'm super short, skinny, a cancer, and australian. I'm a massive geek and I absoloutely love getting into tv shows, movies, games, etc, I usually get so obsessed with them. I love doing quizzes, listening to music, writing, cosplaying, dancing, singing, dancing, and editing [I find so much comfort in all of those things and doing those things make me smile so much]

I have brown, kinda hazelish eyes, with really curly hair that's dyed black but it's going back to my original hair colour which is brown, and I also wear glasses.

I have depression and anxiety [as well as social anxiety] and I usually spend most of my time at home rather than going out [a lot of the time i'll cancel plans even when I was so excited at the time I made them] I don't really like being around massive crowds and feel more comfortable around less people than more. I also have really bad anger issues and I say and do things I don't mean. I am also still being eaten up by mistakes i've made in the past even though I've been told I need to let those mistakes go.

I love wearing hats and beanies and I usually wear jackets and jumpers even when it's not hot. I absoloutely love anything vintage, I love collecting things, I love Cottagecore, and I love the country [country music is one of my favourite genres of music plus I lived in the country for over 5 years]

I'm a really caring and protective person but I also have trust issues as well as separation issues where I can't be away from family or from home too long or I get upset and get antsy. I'm really loyal and really emotional, and I hold grudges for a long time.

Also I'm the youngest in my family [my family is massive btw] My brother is the oldest and my sister is one year older. i live with my mum, I have a cat called dash, and my whole family is massive.

Sorry if that was really long but thank you so much for doing this :)

Hello dear 💖, thanks for your request.

For star wars I ship you with:

Luke skywalker 🎉

I think you would suit the main character as your personalities do combine well.

Luke is someone who would protect you and lay his life on the line for you.

I beileve you and skywalker are one of the most power iconic couples.

Your a jedi, you were trained by yoda and met Luke through him.

Hans solo sort of teases you about your attraction while leia is like your sister.

You and Luke developed a beautiful relationship which was hard at first since you didn't trust Luke.

You wanted to be back at home where your family was but you also didn't want to leave Luke.

You helped Luke in his adventures and eventually he asked to marry you.

You married Luke after the events and had a jedi child, they had your hair and his eyes.

Anyways that's all I have for now:

Ta Ta ✨️

#star wars matchup #star wars matchups open

[astrojoy]

Aphrodite In The Aphrodite Persona Chart

Clothing styles that look gorgeous on you

DISCLAIMER - Don't get upset if you think things don't resonate, remember this is not what you like but rather what does look good on you plus this is just for fun and even stereotypical somewhat. Also actually it has correlated to the charts of people I know close to me, which is why I decided to make this. So my apoligies if it doesn't resonate love 💖 Also a lot of this came to mind while I wrote as well

Things to look out for -

🎀 House meaning correlating to style

🎀 House zodiac

🎀 Aphrodite degree zodiac

🎀 Look where the houses ruler is too!

🎀 Planets can really make a difference

🎀 Aspects too ^-^

Aphrodite - 1388

1st House -> Aries

❤ Something that draws attention

❤ Btw you are hOt 🥵

❤ Sporty clothes

❤ Clothes that show curves/muscles

❤ Red, Gold, Black

❤ Shorts, Crop tops, tank tops, hoodies, vans, sneakers, sunglasses, combat boots, red lipstick, natural makeup too

2nd House -> Taurus

🧡 Fancy clothes

🧡 Luxery clothes

🧡 Orange, Gold, Brown

🧡 Button up long sleeve shirts, fur coat, turtlenecks, dress pants, skin fit dresses/skirts, high heels/dress shoes, nude makeup, gold jewelry, chokers, bold eyeliner

3rd House -> Gemini

💚 Casual clothes

💚 Hilfiger brand clothes

💚 Navy blue, Dark green, Brown

💚 Vans, button up t-shirts, high waist skirts, suites, sweater vests, glasses, high thigh socks, calf socks, cuffed shorts, sun dresses, wooden jewelry, silver or gold works for jewelry

4th House -> Cancer

💙 Comfort clothes

💙 Cute clothes

💙 White, Pastel, Beige, Blue

💙 Wool sweaters, Turtlenecks, regular sweatshirts, mid sleeve shirts, plaid jackets, oversized shirts/hoodies, high waist skirts, skinny jeans, boots, thigh high socks, silver jewelry, skincare

5th House -> Leo

💜 Flashy clothes

💜 Stylish clothes

💜 Orange, Gold, Pink, Black

💜 Skin fit dresses, flowy dresses, tuxedos, any makeup look, hoop earrings, gold jewelry, muscle shirts, skinny jeans, crop tops, Winter jackets, boots, dyed hair, fake nails

6th House -> Virgo

💖 Sporty clothes

💖 Casual/laid back clothes

💖 Green, Blue, Brown, Red

💖 Tank tops, crop tops, sneakers, shorts, zip up shirts, jackets/hoodies, skirts, cottagecore, combat boots, nike, any earrings, silver jewelry, earthy jewelry, hats

7th House -> Libra

❤ Luxery clothes

❤ Cute clothes

❤ Pink, Pastel, Gold

❤ High waist skirts, skinny jeans, sweaters, heels/dress shoes, suites, any makeup, gold jewelry, crop tops, dresses, bows, fake nails, dyed hair, aesthetics, rings, cuffed shorts, long socks, tight fit boots

8th House -> Scorpio

🧡 Sexy clothes

🧡 Darker clothes

🧡 Black, Purple, Red

🧡 Long dresses showing on leg, boots, grunge, chokers, reserved clothes, skinny jeans, hoodies/jackets, vans, silver jewelry, green actually could look cute, bold eyeliner, corsets, tank tops, tattoos, long sleeved shirts, bracelets, sunglasses

9th House -> Sagittarius

💛 Casual clothes

💛 Intellectual clothes

💛 Red, Blue, Brown

💛 sweater vests, ties, glasses, long sleeves, skin fit skirts/dresses, t-shirts, sneakers, sunglasses, fake nails, gold jewelry, bold makeup, natural makeup, shorts, indie, hats

10th House -> Capricorn

💚 Formal attire

💚 Reserved clothes

💚 Brown, Black, Navy blue, White

💚 Suites/formal womans dresses, sunglasses, silver or gold jewelry, bold makeup, rings, fake nails, heels/dress shoes, jeans, overalls?, shorts

11th House -> Aquarius

💙 Flowy clothes

💙 Aesthetic clothes

💙 Sky blue, Yellow, Black

💙 Unique styles, colorful shirts, shorts, calf socks, indie, button up shirts, sweaters, vans, glasses, bracelets, seashell necklaces, beach boy/girl vibes too, hats

12th House -> Pisces

💜 Reserved clothing

💜 Comfy attire

💜 Blue, Black, Purple

💜 Long sleeves, jeans, freckles came into mind, leather shoes, long socks, sunglasses, jackets/hoodies, chokers, mid-sleeves, bracelets, boots, hats, silver jewelry, dreamcore

#astrology #zodiac #all zodiac signs #astrology observations #astro notes #astro observations #astro community #astrology notes #astrology community #astroblr #astrology post #astro post #astrology blog #astro blog #asteroid astrology #astrology houses #Spotify

[watermelonlovershigh]

You Get Sick in the Back of an Uber

AN: so this was a story i have had in my drafts for like three months and just never found motivation to finish it. i decided to finish this first out of my drafts because it was one of the ones that had the most already written for it. unlike some of my others that don't have much written yet. and this was supposed to be longer but i got lazy and ended the end with no dialogue and shorted the story. but i guess that's fine because the main part of this was the uber incident and not necessary the aftercare. (i just love to always include aftercare whether its with sex or getting sick. unless its a blurb) @harryhoney-bee suggested number 1. on my voting post so thank you for requesting i finish this one shot idea that was in my drafts.

This story contains: puke, drunken person, caring husband

{ husband!harry - dad!harry - Grammys 2021 Harry - 4 kids (any age you imagine) }

word count: 1765

When you drink too much at the Grammys, you end up having to get sick in the uber ride home and Harry cares for you.

-------------------------

Back Story-

After the Grammys, Harry and I decided to go to the little after party that was being held for the Grammy attendees. We knew we couldn't stay too long because we had to get back home to our kids. They were currently with our babysitter but she couldn't stay all night. She has to go home at some point. So we made sure to watch the time.

At the afterparty, drinks were flowing. I haven't drank in a while due to the fact I had been pregnant not too long ago. This was the first night I was allowed to drink and I decided to do just that. Harry was aware of me drinking and promised to watch and take care of me. Though we were at this afterparty for him, he wanted me to let loose and have some fun as well.

But what he wasn't expecting was for me to drink the amount I did. I didn't mean to go over board. It just kind of happened. People handing out drinks left and right and next thing I knew, I was drunk. Not tipsy, drunk. When Harry noticed how drunk I was, he decided it's best to go home.

And because Harry also had drank some alcohol, he wasn't in a state to drive either. By no means was he as drunk as me though. Maybe just tipsy but he didn't want to risk it. So he decided to call an uber for us.

--------------------

Current-

We're sitting in the back of the uber on our way home. It's about an hour drive since the city is crowded with traffic due to the Grammys. Right about now is when I regret drinking any alcohol tonight. Because I haven't drank in over a year, my body isn't use to the poison running through my veins. So you could say I'm a lightweight now. My head is throbbing. My vision is blurry. My stomach is turning. Lets just say I regret all my decisions tonight that lead to me feeling this way.

"Harrrrry I don't feel good." I manage to slur out.

"You probably should have stuck to champagne instead of vodka my love." Harry responds, while stroking my hair out of my face in a gentle manner.

Another 10 minutes pass and I'm feeling very nauseous. I'm trying to focus on my breathing but it's not working.

"Harry my stomach hurts." I whisper with hooded eyes.

"Like you're gonna be sick?" Harry questions with panic.

I nod my head and hear Harry asking the driver if he can pull over.

"Can you pull over? My wife is feeling ill." Harry frantically questions the uber driver up front.

"I'm sorry sir but this freeway is packed and there is no way I can get to the side of the road right now." the driver says with a bit of an attitude.

Hearing that made me and Harry both start to panic.

"Well do you have any sick bags in here?" my husband asks.

"Sorry I don't." the driver retorts in a uncaring tone. What kind of uber driver doesn't carry sick bags for when drunks potentially need a ride but feel like they are going to be sick?

I just barley hear Harry let out a frustrated sigh and turn to me.

"Try and relax love. Take deep breaths for me, alright." Harry whispers while rubbing my back as I'm slumped over his body, too disoriented to even hold my head up.

About 3 minutes later, I feel vomit rise up my throat. There isn't much I can to do. The driver already said he couldn't pull over, nor does he have sick bags. I sit up from my slouched position and clasp a hand over my mouth. My legs are bouncing up and down. I'm trying desperately not to puke but I'm doing a poor job. Harry is sitting up with me, trying to comfort me but his words are all a blur at this point.

"If you have to be sick darling, let it out. I'll pay to get this uber cleaned, okay." Harry states in my ear. I know he'd rather not have me puke on the floor of the uber, right beside him, but he can tell I'm struggling and in discomfort.

Hearing those words was all the conformation I needed. I remove my hand from my mouth and let out a gush of alcoholic bile spew from my mouth and onto the backseat floor board. Harry gathers my hair in his hands so it's not in my face. My vomit splatters all over my legs and on the bottom of Harry's Gucci suit. I'd feel terrible about that if I wasn't so out of it, but my mind is a mushed up blur.

"Shhh, that's it. You're alright." Harry reassures me. The uber driver lets out a sigh of disgust, but this is truly his fault that I'm throwing up in his uber right now anyways.

Heave after heave, I let out more of the alcohol that was poisoning my system, right onto the floor. It's not a pretty sight. I'm having a cold sweat and my body is trembling. Though Harry has a weak stomach, when it comes to his wife (me) or his kids, he can always handle a bit of throw up. Or a lot like currently. It's like a fatherly/husband instinct that comes over him and he feels only adrenaline, not yuck.

Finally I feel my stomach relax and I sit up, breathing heavy with vomit dripping down my chin. Without thinking, I wipe it off with the back of my hand and smear it on my already ruined dress. "Feeling better?" Harry asks in a low tone.

"Mhmm." I hum, not really feeling like talking. My drunken brain has cleared up some from the majority of the alcohol being out of my system, but I still feel the after affects drinking brings. I just lean my head on Harry's shoulder for the rest of the ride home and allow the cool breeze to blow on my face. The uber driver did us all a favor by rolling the windows down so we didn't suffocate on the nasty smell of my sick.

---------------------

After-

When we arrived home, Harry payed the uber driver, not giving much of a tip and told him that he'd have someone clean his car out in the morning. As well as a half assed apology for my incident beings it could have been prevented. Then carefully, Harry lifted me out the uber and carried me into our Los Angeles home. Good thing our kids were all asleep because they shouldn't have to see their mother like this. Covered in puke and half drunk.

Harry took me to our bathroom and quickly ran down stairs to pay our babysitter, hoping she didn't question my appearance when she saw my state as we came through the front door. She didn't thankfully and left soon after her check was handed to her. Harry came back up to where he left me and helped me clean up and get ready for bed.

He stripped us of our vomit covered clothes and helped me into the big walk-in shower we have in our master bathroom. Then after he delicately washed our bodies along with my hair, he helped us out and dried us off. We brushed our teeth, me with the help of my husband because I was still a bit dizzy. After we're clean of sick and smelt fresh, he helped me put some panties and a t-shirt over my nude body and boxers on himself; just incase our kids woke up and needed us for whatever reason.

Harry helped me into our large bed and tucked me in, bending down to kiss my forehead. Then he walked down to the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water and a bucket incase I needed to be sick again at some point through-out the rest of the early morning. When he had all the items he intended to grab, Harry came back to our bedroom where I was already passed out with sleep.

So he just set the water on my night stand and the bucket on the floor, beside my side of the bed. Then Harry quietly exited our room and went to each of our child's bedrooms to make sure they were fine and still asleep like they should be, which they thankfully were.

When everything was done and taken care of, Harry turned the bedroom lights out and slipped in the covers with me. He helped my body scoot over and I cuddled into his warm body. I didn't realize it in my state of sleep but I knew when I awoke, I'll be thinking about how grateful I am to have a wonderful husband like Harry.

He takes such good care of me. He didn't get upset that I drank too much on his special night and accidently got wasted. He never once got upset that I basically got throw up on his expensive suit tonight in the uber. He didn't get annoyed that he had to shower both me and him past midnight, though he was exhausted. Harry loves taking care of me (and our kids) and wouldn't wish for any other life. Even when his life becomes chaotic and stressful. Harry loves his family dearly and his family love him just as much or more.

Masterlist (regular smut, fluff & sicfics)

My Favorite Harry Styles Fics MASTERLIST

Harry Styles Series - One Shots & Blurbs Masterlist

Harry Styles blurbs, concepts, & short stories Masterlist- (short writing with little to no dialog)

#harry styles #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles fanfic #harry styles x reader #husband!harry #dad!harry #harry styles sicfic #sicfic #harry styles grammys #grammys 2021 #harry styles comfort #soft!harry #husbandandwife #harry styles uber

[ransprang]

hi, can i please get a romance Tokyo ghoul and hunterxhunter match up please?

I'm female, she/her pronouns; leo[August leo], 5'8, my favourite colour is red, short light brown hair, dark brown ayes; i have beauty marks on tip of my nose, right cheek, under my left aye and on my chin;

Likes: colour red, cats, serpents, MY cooking, my height, horror[movies, manga, anime cartoon, webtoon, etc] psychology, spicy food, books;

Dislike: dogs, sweets, math, my math teacher, romance movies[i like romance books, anime, mangas and etc i just hate romance movies]

Hobbies and interests: reading books, listening to music, drawing, watching movies/animes, working out; I'm pretty interested in horror genre, psychology, myths, legends, murder documentaries;

I'm usually chill and laid back, i am very friendly and get along with almost everyone, I don't hold grudges but i also can be a bitch [ unintentionally most of the time] I don't necessarily like kids but i enjoy playing with them [I'm not a favourite cousin for nothing] When there is a conflicting either i caused it and others are quarreling over something i said and I'm standing in the sidelines[it happened few times and it was unintentional] or I'm trying to stop the fight [ one I didn't cause]

I can be a quite bossy, I'm straight forward and blunt [ i always say my honest opinion, which usually makes me seen as a rude]in a friend group I'm what you call a mom friend [my friends usually come for me for advices, help, when they need help with homework, when creeps are bothering them, movie advices, and etc]

I see myself as a very understanding and responsible person, I'm more that happy to help friends in need, listen to their problems and do my best to help them.

I can get annoyed or angry easily but i almost never get physical, instead i verbally attack one who upset or angers me, if person I'm quarreling with is my friend i might apologize [indirectly] and stop before i say something i might regret later or if I'm quarreling with someone I'm not close with i use their insecurities against them.

I don't necessarily like lying so i only lie when i see it as a necessary [with teachers, some of the people i dislike which aren't lot]

I dislike possessive people, i prefer "pretty boys" over "handsome" ones and i have a huge hand fetish [like I'm your biggest simp if your hands are so nice and pretty] i can tolerate reserved and quiet people, people with anger issues, liars, heck i can even get along with pervert ones but i hate disrespect and degradation but that doesn't mean i appreciate too much praise and compliments either.

I don't expect my ideal partner to be perfect.

I just want him to be understanding and encouraging with me [directly or indirectly] should let me pamper them becouse i like giving gifts, presents, compliments and things like that to people i love and care; [i might stop compliments if it makes them too uncomfortable i can't day I'll stop giving them presents and thing's like that, i don't make empty promises]

My ideal partner shouldn't be controling and possessive [ if he dislikes someone i hang out with or doesn't likes something i do all he needs to do is tell me like a normal person]

My ideal partner should expect late nigt texts becouse i have insomnia and if I'm suffering from lack of sleeping so are they.[jk i wouldn't let them suffer every night]

I prefer begin one in charge in a relationship but if my partner prefers to be a dominant one i might let them dom me once or twice that's it. I rather spoon them than be spooned [is that even a word?]

If my partner has a big appetite then they are in a luck becouse i like cooking [doesn't matters if they are sweet tooth or not]

I don't really care about their height

I don't really care about gender of my partner but i prefer males;

Nsfw and NSF

hii thank you for the request!! (admin sar: your makima profile picture really suits you btw)

we hope you like your match ups!!

your tokyo ghoul match up is............Shuu Tsukiyama!!

SFW

He's your perfect pretty boy...maybe even handsome.

We've seen close up shots of his hands in the anime, best believe his hands are strong and sexy for your fetish.

Oh boy! Let's not get started on his appetite. This man can eat. Have you seen him thirst after Kaneki? Well he will eat everything you cook (if it's edible for a ghoul that is :))

He's got sophisticated interests, he likes classical music, tasteful movies. You best believe he keeps fit.

He will listen to you talk about all your horror stories, indulge you in all your interesting facts. He may even share scary stories as a ghoul.

This man is nothing but straightforward, he is blunt and is a total boss. So he will understand your personality and you two can be boss bitches together.

Hes old and responsible. He will look after you and scout for food for you too, but only the most exquisite one.

He would murder but not get physical, so he can appreciate someone with similar virtues.

Pamper him all you want, give him everything in the world this flamboyant ghoul will it all!!

nsfw & hxh match up is under the cut

N/SFW

You can dom his flamboyant ass any day. Hes gonna be such a switch, he will instantly lay down for you to do your thang.

He likes getting spooned as much as he likes spooning. Hes would love to feel the warmth of a loved one against him in any form. Especially if you wanna cuddle his rock hard abs.

He is gonna be your little brat, he will love to defy you and go against you. Watching you be his brat tamer will turn him on to the max.

Get ready to food play in the bed room you can lay him down with food on his nethers and eat it off him. This man is gonna cum so hard.

your hxh match up is............Beans!!

SFW

Beans would lap up anything you cook. Even the most spiciest food such as yourself of course *wink*. I mean hes a bean himself after all.

Hes such a simp he will eat cat food if you offer him that.

Your favourite colour is red? well hell, Beans is gonna dye himself red for you. Hes green anyways so a little red change gonna hurt no one.

Bean will sit there quietly with a very small smile on his face and listen to you speak about psychology, murder documentaries and other scary stuff with a twinkle in his eye getting mesmerised by watching you talk.

After Netero is gone beans is gonna have to be bossy and straight forward and that can get your boat floating.

Beans is a bean. He understand the importance of respect and hence he wont be possessive. Instead he will respect you and your space.

Beans is a simp so he will stay up all night accompanying you through your insomnia. He will instantly reply to your texts keeping you entertained. Plus hes used to getting overworked by that lil bitch Netero.

Throw Beans in a group of kids (your cousins) and watch him get harassed.

N/SFW

don't underestimate this man

Why do you think Beans wears gloves? To protect those sexy hands of his. he keeps his fingers safe to finger you. He will even slap you with his glove if you ask him.

Eat him out, and he will instantly relieve your constipation. cuz hes a bean? get it?

After meeting you he will understand those black dots on your face are more than just marks in your beauty. They are a part of you. Beans isnt familiar with the concept i mean have you seen his skin?

He wears cute red lingerie under that sexy suit just for you ;)

your pretty girls,

admins sav & sar

#tsukiyama shuu x reader #tsukiyama x reader #tsukiyama shuu #tsukiyama #shuu tsukiyama #tokyo ghoul imagines #tokyo ghoul #tokyo ghoul re #tokyoghoulre #tokyo ghoul x reader #tokyoghoul #beans hxh #hxh beans #hunter x hunter #hxh #hunter hunter #hxh scenarios #hxh imagine #hxh imagines #hxh x reader #admin sav #admin sar

[outlawsworld]

Trusting Strangers - Chapter 6

Arthur Morgan x Female reader

Summary: The reader tries to ignore her true feeling for Arthur. She dresses up for a job which may lead to feeling coming to the surface.

Warnings: slight violence. Nothing too major

Notes: I hope you all enjoy this chapter. Please reblog/like/message me to let me know if you like it.

Chapter 1

--

It can't be, It just can't. How could this have happened? You never had feelings for someone before yet here you were. There was nothing you could have done because it's not like these feelings crept up on you, they hit you like a train. All at once with no warning. You were laid in your tent looking up to the canvas. Sleeping wasn't an easy task as your mind was too full to relax. The morning light had started to creep through your tent but you just laid there trying to conserve as much energy as you possibly could. You knew the longer you laid in bed made it more likely someone would come and get you. So you decided to finally pull yourself up and change into your clothes. You scraped your hair into a braid before pulling your boots on. As you left your tent the morning air hit you and you could see no one else was awake. It must have been a lot earlier then you had thought. For once you were looking forward to doing your chores, they may help in taking your mind off things. You poured yourself a coffee and sat on a log staring at the flames as they rose. It wasn't too long before you heard Pearson make his way over to his cart to begin his day cooking.

''You got some nice catches the other day girlie'' He shouted over to you. ''Nice bits of meat like this will feed us for a week'' he smirked as he began to cut up pieces of game. You just smiled in his direction and turned back to your coffee. You were soon joined by Tilly, Abigail and Jack as they had their morning breakfast.

''You alright (Y/N)?'' Jack asked you quietly as he took a bite from a bread roll.

''I'm alright Jack, how've you been?'' you smiled down at him. You couldn't help but feel joy whenever Jack was around. He was so innocent and sweet that you forgot that you were all outlaws on the run.

''I'm good. Mamma said to ask you if I can help with the horses today?'' he looked at Abigail who gave you a nervous smile.

''I don't see why not'' you turned your attention back to Jack.

''Thank you (Y/N), I'll go get my coat'' he ran back off to his tent and Abigail shuffled to sit next to you.

''I was gonna ask, I just didn't get chance before Jack'' she sighed. ''I just need a day, just one day''

''It's fine, honestly'' you cut her short. You could tell that raising a child in this environment was hard. ''He can help me feed and brush the horses down'' you smiled at Abigail in a reassuring way.

''Thank you (Y/N)'' she smiled back at you before Jack returned.

''Come on then. You can help me feed them first'' you stood from the log and gestured for Jack to follow you to the horses. He followed close behind you and you showed him exactly what to do. You made sure he had the easier jobs that didn't include any heavy lifting. A smile beamed from his face as he was setting out small piles of hay for the horses. You couldn't help but smile at the effort he put into it and you could tell he took a shine to Dallas. The jobs took a little longer than they normally would but you didn't mind, it was a welcomed distraction. You grabbed a grooming brush and passed it to Jack before standing him on a crate next to Dallas.

''There you go. You can reach his neck and back now'' you stood next to him as you both brushed the black stallion.

''Can I ride him?'' Jack asked as he was in awe.

''Would your mum be alright with it?'' you asked, giving him a cheeky smile. You quickly looked to see if Abigail was watching but you couldn't see her. With one motion you lifted Jack onto Dallas' bare back. ''Hold on tight'' you smiled up at him as you unhitched Dallas and led him at a walk around the outskirts of camp. You only walked slowly so that Jack didn't become unbalanced without a saddle.

''Whoa, look at me'' he shouted as you walked through the woods. Jack patted Dallas on the neck and his smile was bright as he was giggling at every movement.

''You will be able to ride him by yourself one day'' you smiled up at Jack which only made him more thrilled. John was standing at the hitching post as you finished your walk. You felt slight dread as you approached him, you were unsure if Jack was allowed to ride bareback.

''Look at you Kid'' John smiled at you both and the dread left your body.

''We went all the way around the camp'' Jack beamed as John helped him down from Dallas. You hitched him up before turning to John.

''Jacks been a great helper this mornin''' you patted him on the shoulder before he ran back into camp to tell everyone about his ride. ''Sorry I didn't ask first'' you looked at John innocently.

''What to ride? Don't worry about it'' he chuckled. ''Your good with him, been round kids much?'' John followed you as you went to check the other horses.

''No, not really'' you smirked. ''I had no siblings''.

''Ahh, me neither'' he leaned up against the hitching post as you brushed down Dutch's white Arabian. ''You are better with him then I am anyway'' John looked down at his feet. You stopped what you were doing and turned to look at him. He looked visibly upset as he spoke about Jack.

''That's not true. I've seen you with him and your great'' you paused as you waited for John's reaction.

''I'm not cut out at being a father. Not yet anyways'' John sighed. ''He's a good kid but I think I've left it too late''.

''It's never too late John, trust me'' you managed to catch his eye before smiling at him. ''Why don't you do something with him today? I think Abigail needs a day off'' you giggled and he smiled weakly at you.

''Your right. As always. Is there anything you can't do (Y/N)?'' John began to chuckle.

''I can't cook'' you giggled as you turned back to the horse. Charles approached you both as you began to brush The Count again. Charles helped with the last of your chores and John got roped into helping too so you managed to finish in the early afternoon.

''You hungry?'' Charles asked you as you finished brushing down the last horse.

''Starvin'.'' You were quick to reply. The three of you walked back into camp and grabbed some bread and stew from Pearson before sitting around the fire. The rest of the girls joined you as you ate.

''I heard about a job'' Karen blurted out. ''It's a good one'' she seemed so excited as she spoke.

''What is it?'' John questioned before he took a mouthful of stew.

''There's a rich fella staying in Valentine. Bit of a ladies man but damn he's rich'' she giggled. ''I seen him in the saloon drinking and I think if we get him drunk enough it will be an easy steal''.

''Alright?'' Charles questioned missing whatever point Karen was trying to get too.

''Well there is a problem you see....us girls have already tried but he ain't interested in us'' she sighed. ''Stupid fool. But....I know one girl who could handle herself who ain't tried yet'' she glanced at you and gave you a wink. Suddenly all the attention was on you.

''What?'' you exclaimed. ''Have you seen me....if he ain't interested in you there is no way...''

''We will make you look irresistible'' Tilly cut you off.

''You can borrow one of my best dress' and we will do your hair all pretty'' Mary-Beth added. You could see John and Charles giggling in the corner of your eye and you gave them an irritated stare.

''I'm not as good at flirtin' as you'' you were trying to think of any excuse to get out of it.

''Don't give me that'' Karen shrugged your comment off. She stood up and held out her hand to you, there was no getting out of this. You looked for help from John or Charles but they didn't come to your rescue. There were no more excuses so you grabbed Karen's hand and she dragged you to her tent.

You sat while Mary-Beth tugged at your knotted hair. Each stroke of the brush felt like she was ripping part of your scalp off. Tilly was busy trying to find a suitable dress that would suit you the best and Karen was applying powder to your cheeks. Sadie and Abigail were sitting in the corner giggling at your unamused face.

''You will look stunning when we are done with you (Y/N)'' Tilly smiled at you.

''That's right. No man will be able to resist you'' Karen winked at you. ''Not that you care about that''

''What does that mean?'' Mary-Beth asked.

''(Y/N) ain't sweet on anyone'' Karen looked up to Mary-Beth and giggled.

''Really?'' Mary-Beth pulled on another knot in your hair. You winced and tried to ignore the conversation because you knew that wasn't quite true anymore.

''Well it's probably a good job. I mean.....John has Abigail drooling over him'' Karen glanced at Abigail ignoring the angry look she received. ''Javier is a flirt, Lenny is too young for her, Bill is dumb, Charles is just a 'friend', Kieran is only interested in his horse'' Karen giggled ''and Arthur is Arthur''. You furrowed your brow at this comment.

''What do you mean?'' you asked curiously.

''Arthur has never been sweet on anyone in camp but I'm pretty sure each of us have been sweet on him at some point'' she sighed.

''You have all been sweet on him?'' you scanned the room for the girls reaction and they all nodded except Sadie.

''It's hard to not be. He is a mystery and so manly'' Tilly smiled. ''There is something exciting about that''.

''Yes, but he's never reciprocated the feelings'' Abigail interjected before Tilly got carried away. Your heart sunk slightly as you thought about how stupid you were, you had let your feelings take control. Arthur wasn't interested in anyone and you were just setting yourself up for disappointment. The girls worked on you for a couple of hours until you were pristeen. Tilly had picked out a dark blue dress which complemented your features well. They all helped you squeeze into the corset before finally climbing into the dress. Your hair was knott free and hanging down past your shoulders and your makeup made you look blemish free.

''You look beautiful'' Abigail smiled at you as you stood ready to go show the camp the girls' hard work. You struggled to take a deep breath before leaving the tent, the corset clung to your ribs not allowing for much movement. The sun was beginning to set as you stepped out of the tent and made your way over to the rest of camp. Everyone was gathered round the campfire as you gingerly strode over them.

''Introducing the woman who is going to steal the heart and possessions of the richest man passing through Valentine'' Karen gestured for you to stand in front of everyone. You approached slowly as the girls moved to one side. The redness in your cheeks was hidden by the makeup but you could feel your temperature rise with embarrassment as you stood with everyone gawking at you.

''Wow (Y/N)'' Hosea looked up at you. ''You look incredible my girl'' he smiled at you as you looked at him before looking around to see the others reaction. They all sat there in shock at how you looked. Javier stood up and took your hand in his before pressing his lips to the back of it.

''Stunning'' He said after laying a kiss on your hand. You chuckled as he did this, the last thing you expected was this reaction. Suddenly you felt confident in the way you looked and you stood up taller and even did a little twirl.

''What's everyone lookin' at?'' you heard his voice from behind you and suddenly the nerves creeped back up. Taking a breath you turned round to see Arthur and his eyes landed on you too. His eyes widened and his jaw dropped slightly as he looked at you all dressed up. You managed a shy smile but your heart was racing and you could feel that sickness in your stomach as he approached you slowly. He stopped right in front of you as he scanned you up and down, it was the first time you had seen him all day. For a minute you forgot everyone else was there. They had all turned there attention away from you now anyway. ''Hello beautiful'' he finally whispered to you as you looked up into his eyes. You felt breathless as he looked at you the way he was. Everything in your body was telling you to wrap your arms around him and not let him go but you pushed them to one side.

''Hello Arthur'' you managed to reply with a shy smile.

''What's the occasion?'' he asked not breaking eye contact with you. You could feel the heat from his body as he stood so close to you.

''(Y/N) is going to seduce a rich fella in Valentine so we can rob him blind'' Karen interrupted the moment. Arthur's face suddenly went stern and he backed away from you.

''Who's goin'?'' he turned to Karen with slight irritation in his voice.

''Well me, (Y/N) and I don't know.....Bill?'' she gestured to Bill who was already downing a bottle of whiskey.

''Bill? You seriously haven't thought this through 'av ya?'' Arthur sighed. ''I'll go. Let me just get ready'' he turned to his tent to grab some things whilst you and Karen made your way over to the wagon. John helped you both in and past you a pistol that you tucked into one of the folds of your dress.

''Damn (Y/N)'' he shook his head. ''You look amazing. Make sure he knows where to keep his hands or he'll lose em'' John smiled at you. Arthur was quick and mounted into the driver's seat and with that you were on your way to Valentine.

''So the plan is to get him drunk'' Karen started talking to you. ''He needs to think that you are going to sleep with him. When he is drunk enough you go to his room, wait for him to pass out and take everything worth taking'' she giggled.

''What if he don't pass out?'' Arthur asked and turned to give Karen a quick glance. ''Then what?''

''Well I guess (Y/N) will have to sleep with him'' Karent winked. You were about to protest but you were too slow. Arthur had already stopped the cart and turned to the both of you.

''That ain't happenin'.'' His tone was stern as he pointed at Karen.

''I was jokin' Arthur. Calm down, you almost sound jealous'' Karen teased.  ''She can hit him over the head with her pistol'' Arthur sighed, still not fully satisfied with Karen's answer but started the wagon moving again. You arrived at Valentine a couple of minutes later and you could hear the music and loud conversations coming from inside the saloon. Karen went ahead to check that the man was definitely in the saloon before you all went in. Arthur came to the back of the wagon to help you down. He put his hands around your waist and slowly lowered you until your feet hit the floor but he didn't remove his hands straight away. You looked up to see concern on his face and he took a deep breath before releasing his grip on you.

''I don't like this'' he muttered before Karen came running over.

''Show time'' she grinned before linking her arm through yours. ''We will go in first Arthur, we don't want him thinkin' you came with us'' she pulled you away. You glanced back at Arthur who clenched his jaw while holding back allowing you to go in first.

The music and smell of beer hit you as you walked into the warm saloon. There were a lot of people there singing, danicing and getting drunk. You seemed to attract the attention from a lot of men as you and Karen made your way over to the bar. The bartender passed you both a shot of whiskey each.

''That's him over there, with the red coat and mustache'' Karen glanced in the man's direction. ''Seems like he's already noticed you'' she giggled. You took your shot as quickly as you could before ordering another. If you were going to do this you needed something to get rid of the nerves. You were so used to pick pocketing or house robberies but this was something you had never done. Getting a man's attention wasn't the hard thing it was playing them so they don't suspect a thing. You grabbed your drink and walked over to an empty table and sat down slowly eyeing up your target. He had many women sitting around him at his table but his attention was on you, never breaking eye contact. You could tell he was an attractive young man and his attitude showed that he knew it too. Arthur walked into the saloon, you watched as he searched for you and caught your eye before making his own way to the bar. You turned your attention back to the target and you saw he was already making his way over to you.

''I don't believe we have met'' he held his hand out to you and you took it. ''Simon Clark'' he gently kissed the back of your hand.

''Bethany Hope'' you made up a name and introduced yourself.

''Mind if I join you?'' he asked and you nodded before he took a seat next to you. You glanced at the bar to see Karen and Arthur watching you and you felt a sense of relief that you had them watching out for you. ''How come I have never seen you before?''

''Maybe you weren't looking hard enough'' you teased him.

''You are not someone I would overlook'' he looked you up and down and you felt exposed. ''Drink?''

''How about we share a bottle?'' you smiled curiously at him. He nodded and headed to the bar to get a bottle of whiskey. You took a deep breath and looked at Arthur. He didn't take his eyes off you for a second as he clutched at his own drink.

''Here you go'' Simon poured you a shot and took his seat again. You tapped your glasses together before taking your drinks. Simon liked to speak about himself, which made things easier. You pretended to be interested in his stories while you kept on pouring drink after drink for him. He never once questioned that you were not drinking but it was probably because he didn't care. Simon was so engulfed in talking that he hadn't realised he had finished the bottle by himself. His words had started to slur and he clung to the table to stop from falling off his chair. ''Will you accompany me to my room?'' he slurred as his hand laid on your leg and started to make its way up your thigh. You had to resist the urge to brush his hand away. Having a strange man touch you intimately brought back bad memories but you tried to shut them out.

''After another drink'' you stood up removing his hand before collecting another drink from the bar. As the barman handed you another two shots of whiskey you quickly glanced at Arthur and gave him a reassuring nod. He gave you a weak smile but you could tell he wasn't enjoying this. Karen was currently flirting with another guy at the back of the room leaving Arthur by himself. You thanked the barman before heading back to Simon who now had his forehead pressed against the table. "Here" you passed him the whiskey as you drank the other. The liquor was strong and made your eyes water slightly. He downed the drink before stumbling to his feet.

"Follow me sweetheart" Simon whispered in your ear. The smell of alcohol on his breath was overwhelming but you took his hand and followed him to the door. Arthur watched from the bar as you made your way to the door not letting you out of his sight.

"I'm in the hotel across the street over there. Got a very comfy bed for us to sleep in" Simon's words were slurred as he almost fell out of the saloon. You couldn't help but feel sorry for the women that fall for men like this. The cold night air hit you hard as you followed him outside and down the stairs. You started to make your way to the hotel when he dragged you down a little ally between two buildings.

"This doesn't look like a hotel" you rolled your eyes as Simon pressed you to the wall. He was pressing his body into yours to keep himself from falling over. You took the opportunity to pick pocket him while he whispered sweet words into your ear. "oh, yeah, ahuh sounds good" you muttered not listening to what he was actually talking about. You had managed to take his watch, what money he had left on him and the key to his room, stuffing them down your dress. Simon then grabbed your wrists and pinned them to the wall above your head. His head went to your neck and left a kiss. Suddenly the touch from this man sent panic surging through your body. It felt too much like when men had taken advantage of you before. Your knee came up and struck him in his manhood. Simon quickly fell to his knees cluching his groin.

"You slut" he screamed at you as he clambered to his feet. Simon's face was now red with rage as he raised his hand to hit you. You were about to swing for him and defend yourself when he was dragged backwards away from you. Arthur had him pinned against the wall by his throat. You took a deep breath of relief while cursing at the corset restricting your movement. Where did he come from? You didn't even notice that Arthur had followed you.

"That ain't any way to treat a lady" he quickly punched Simon in the face and blood spurted from his nose. "Now you made the mistake of touching this lady in particular" he struck him again. A small whine came from Simon's mouth. His nose was visibly broken and blood was dripping from his face. "No one touches her. No one, you hear" Arthur was angry. You had heard Arthur shout a lot but this was different. He was red with rage and there was no stopping it so you stayed back and watched. Simon nodded and Arthur punched him one last time. You heard a crunch as he dropped to the floor. Simon was out cold.

"You alright?" Arthur turned around to face you. He scanned you up and down to make sure Simon hadn't hurt you in any way with a look of slight panic in his eye.

"I'm fine. You didn't have to do that ya know" you looked down at Simon as he laid face down on the floor. "I had it under control" you began to walk out of the ally when Arthur grabbed you, pulled you back and pushed you against the wall. You hadn't noticed the people that rushed into the street when they heard a commotion. It was a good idea that you don't get caught with Simon knocked out or the law would be quickly on your case. Arthur's strong arms were keeping you pinned to the wall and his body was close to yours. Your heart began to beat loudly as you could feel him so close to you.  The both of you stayed extremely quiet as the people on the street tried to find where the noise was coming from. Although you had been in this situation only minutes before it felt completely different with Arthur. You didn't want him to move away from you, you weren't scared of him. The sickness in the pit of your stomach came back as you looked up to catch Arthur's gaze. His lips were only inches away from yours and you could feel your temperature rising with every second you stood there.

"Damn it Ben, you must be hearin' things" a man called out as they made there way back into the saloon. Arthur peered around the corner to check it was clear before backing away from you. There it was again. The instant coldness you felt when Arthur wasn't as close to you anymore. You took a deep breath as you pushed yourself off the wall.

"Sorry" Arthur muttered as you left the ally. "For pushing you like that" he added before making his way to the wagon.

"It's alright" your voice cracked slightly. "Where you goin'?" Arthur turned round and cocked and eyebrow at you. "I have his room key, don't ya wanna see what he has in there?" you gestured to the hotel. Arthur nodded and you lead the way into the hotel and up to Simon's room. You looted the whole room and you made close to $1,000 in money, jewels and deeds.

"Least it was worth it" you smirked as you searched through the last draw.

"You might think so" Arthur snapped back at you. His tone was dry and irritated. You stood up and faced him as he counted the stack of money he had found. Anger rushed over you and before you could stop yourself you snapped back at him.

"I didn't ask for your help Arthur. He could barely stand up and I had control of the situation" you shouted at him. He was acting as if you weren't able to do the job by yourself. You had spent months by yourself and never had a problem so it irritated you that Arthur had felt the need to step in.

"Oh really? Because from where I'm standin' he had you pinned against a wall. Kissin' your neck and was about to hit ya" Arthur's voice drowned yours out. "Didn't look in control to me".

"I can defend myself. Don't need you to fight my battles for me" everything inside you wanted to scream at him. "It was my job and I was doing just fine untill you intervened".

"I know you can defend yourself (Y/N). I know that better then anyone cause I've seen it but do you think I'm just gonna stand there and watch him touch you like that?" Arthur marched across the room to stand directly in front of you. He towered above you, just like he had the first time you had gone hunting. Making you feel small and helpless. His body was so close to yours that you could feel the heat radiating from him again. You both stood there tense and unmoving. "Do you know how hard it was for me to watch him with you all night?" his voice was hushed now but still assertive. His brow was furrowed as he looked deep into your eyes waiting for your response.

"Why would you even care?" the words came out of your mouth uncontrollably. You were not intimidated by Arthur. Not anymore, not after everything you had been through. You didn't back away from him like you had before. His eyes widened at your comment but he was quick to reply.

"Because I do care about you (Y/N). A lot more then I should" Arthur sighed before continuing. "I know you can fight your own battles, I know that. But seeing him touch you made me so damn angry that I needed to....well ya know. You don't have to fight alone anymore. I'm here to back you up and I'm sorry it came across that I don't believe in ya" he spoke softly as he placed his hand on your shoulder and scanned your face. You were taken aback by his comments. He wasn't trying to fight for you, but with you. Sudden guilt flooded your body for getting angry with him.

"Thank you" you stared up at him. "I'm sorry, I just ain't used to people helpin'. I'd been on my own so long I guess I just learnt to fend for myself. I thought you didn't think I was capable of fighting and I got angry" your voice was hushed and slightly cracking. The last person you wanted to argue with was Arthur. You felt all the anger drain from your body which left you feeling deflated. With one motion Arthur pulled you towards him and embraced you. He wrapped his arms around your shoulders and pulled you into his chest. You were shocked at first but accepted the hug by clutching at his shirt. He was warm and smelt of cigarettes and whiskey. You could hear his heart beating in his chest and the feeling of being safe in his arms was enough to make your heart race.

"Your not alone now" Arthur squeezed you tighter as he said this, his voice was almost a whisper. You closed your eyes and nuzzled into his chest to prevent him from seeing your rosie cheeks. The warm feeling in your chest spread throught your body and you wished that you didn't ever have to let go of him. You felt him place a light kiss on your head before he pulled away from you. "Come on, we should get Karen and go back to camp" he gave you a tender smile as he walked across the room and opened the door before gesturing for you to walk through. You slowly walked out of the hotel and back into the street with Arthur following closely behind. Karen was waiting for you at the wagon ready to go.

"How'd it go? Get much from him?" She giggled as Arthur lifted you both into the wagon.

"Yeah, it was worth all the effort" you passed her share to her.

"Told ya it would be a good job" she nudged your arm. "You have a good night Arthur?". He hummed in reply as you left valentine. Karen told you both about her night the whole ride back to camp. She had managed to pick pocket a couple of men and showed you what she had grabbed. Your mind was far away from the convocation as you watched Arthur drive the wagon. You wondered what he meant when he said he cared for you more than he should. He cared about you and that was the only thing that mattered, it made you feel warm inside. You cared about him too, a lot, but there was no way he would care for you the same way you cared for him. It didn't matter to you right at this moment, you were just greatful to have him as a friend. It wasn't a long journey back to camp and when you got back most of the camp were already sleeping. Karen jumped down from the wagon and went straight to her tent to sleep off the alcohol she had consumed. You would have followed but the corset was too restrictive and you could barely move. Arthur came to help you down for the last time tonight.

"I don't know how women wear these damn things" you cursed as your feet touched the floor. Arthur chuckled at you struggling to move.

"I don't know much about that but you look....ermm....you look beautiful tonight" Arthur managed a complement before looking down at his feet and scratching the back of his neck.

"Thank you Arthur" you blushed. "I'm gonna go get outta this thing though, g'night Arthur and thank you again for everything" you smiled sweetly at him whilst trying to brush off your nerves.

"G'night (Y/N)" he tipped his hat and smiled sweetly at you before going to untie the horses from the wagon. You wanted to stay and talk to him all night but your eyes were becoming heavy so you walked away and went straight to Mrs Grimshaw.

"Can you help me outta this?" you smirked as you gestured to your corset. She shook her head before giggling at your incompetence.

--

Chapter 7

@nena-ma

#arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan #rdr2 #rdr2 community #rdr2 arthur #rdr2 photography #red dead redemption two #john marston #red dead redemption 2 #red dead redemption arthur #red dead redemption imagine #rdr2 fanfic #red dead redemption john #red dead redemption fanfic #rdr2 jack #arthur morgan fanfic

[imma-potatoo]

I HAD TOO

I AM NOT SORRY AT ALL @superwholockandpfl

This is once again written for my friend k.c.cosplay on tiktok! Once again, amazing cosplays 💙💛💙💛💙💛💙

Same universe then this fic

*Logan is a dark side*

Ships: Loceit, parental logicality, parental anxceit

Warnings: none that I know of? Let me know if you want me to tag something

-----------

Perseus and Andromeda

-----------

Logan and Janus stood in front of the other four. Smiles completely coated their faces as they both held out their left hands. Janus holding Logan's bicep with his right hand.

Rings. On both of them.

"You- you got married?" Patton's voice was timid. He didn't expect this day to come. But he currently wanted his father-son dance with Logan

Janus and Logan's faces quickly turned to shock. "What?! No! We're engaged! These are engagement rings daa-- Patton!" Logan blushed at the almost use of Pattons old title. Not that Logan didn't view Patton as a father figure -far from it, Janus and him were the youngest sides- but calling someone dad while you are practically the same age and completely imaginary is quite weird in his opinion but I mean-

"My love, your zoning out again."

Logan could hear the amusement in his fiance's voice. Squeezing Janus' hand slightly; Logan cleared his thoat, "What was that question again?"

Roman was slightly laughing before Remus elbowed him in the ribs, "OW REM-" "Roman sh! Do you have a date picked out yet?" Virgil had a hopeful shimmer in his eyes

Logan and Janus looked at eachother briefly, "Not really, to be honest" Janus laughed slightly. "He just asked me last night," a lose curl falling from behind the yellow sides ear. Logan quickly catching it to tuck it back to its rightful place

The sides migranted over to couch. They had a feeling that they'll be talking for a while.

"Any ideas on a theme yet?" Roman was bouncing enthusiastically, hands tight fisted on the couch. A huge ear to ear grin spread on his face

Logan hummed, thinking back to a precious conversation, "We're thinking victorian or dark academia. But we're open to any suggestions!" his hand was tracing circles over and over on Janus' back.

Roman jumped off the couch. Bouncing up and down over and over and over, "FEAR NOT MY BELOVED FRIENDS! I will help you plan it!"

Romans eyes sparkled rapidly. Grin glowing like wild, he paused for a second or two before gasping, "WE COULD HAVE IT IN A HUGE GOLDEN BALLROOM! With crystal plates! And a hundred foot tall cake! An-"

It was at that point where the blue and yellow sides completely zoned out to Romans tangent.

The newly engaged couple gave eachother a look. This look said a lot of things. But mainly 'are we seriously going to let a side who thinks throwing glitter at random objects equels fashion. Complete control of our wedding?' that look. Its a very very specific look. But its a very obvious look.

The red creativity seemed to notice the couples glazed over eyes and blank expression. So he quickly stopped his rant to add on a rather important detail, "I mean... If you guys want me to help. Its completely ok if you don't!! I mean, its ok, I just-"

"Roman for the love of all things holy. Please stop talking." Logan was rubbing his temple with his free hand, "We would love to have you help plan our wedding. But we don't need a ballroom, or crystal plates, or any fancy fairy tale type things." He squeezed Janus' hand with a bright grin, "We just need eachother."

Roman's dramatic pose and extreme tangent faltered. He paused. Seeming to process the information. Before a small grin took his face. "then thats what you two will have."

Janus moved his gaze from Roman to the green twin... Looking at the floor.... With a pout that could kill a god.... Looking very non-Remus esq.

"Remus, do you also want to help plan our wedding?"

In the span of a second, Remus' face bounced between 50 different emotions before settling on complete and utter happiness, "I THOUGHT YOU WOULD NEVER ASK MY AMAZING DOUBLE D-"

Patton slapped his hand over Remus' mouth, "lets not talk about my future son-in-law like that! eeewwwWWWWWW!!! ROMAN HE LICKED MY HAND!!" Patton snapped his hand away as soon as he put it on.

Laughter filled the rest of the night... And quite a bit of wine.

------2 mouths later-----

Logan grumbled as he threw another crumpled piece of paper against the desk. Elbows on the desk, hands pressing into his eyes.

His supposed vows were going amazingly. Completely. Totally. A hundred percent. Amazing....... Oh who was he kidding? His vows were going terribly.

Not from lack of love or anything absolutely ridiculous like that. He loved Janus more then the stars, moon and galaxies combined. He loved everything about Janus.

He loved Janus' snark. He loved the way his eyes glowed when they watched a movie. Or how Janus' voice drips like steeped honey and smoked chives. Or how his snake eye dilates when he's happy. Or when he gets excited and talks for hours and hours about a philosopher or a certain myth that sparked his interest or reminded him of their relationship-

Thats it.

The last myth that Janus was talking about was Perseus and Andromeda.

Andromeda was to be sacrificed to save her kingdom because her mother boasted about her beauty to the nererids. The nererids told their father, Poseidon, and as revenge; Poseidon sent a sea monster to ravenge the kingdom. Perseus, the hero who slayed Medusa, saw Andromeda chained to the stone and slayed the sea monster. After saving her, he took her hand in marriage.

It was far from their love story. Far far from their love story. But...

The way his eyes lit up.

Logan could get drunk on that look. He could live off that look alone for the rest of his life. Oh and that smile

Logan takes his head out of his hands. Mouth agape.

He had an idea

---------

Janus had been hitting his head against his desk for hours.

Janus could write millions of speeches, and could convince armys to do his bidding, and he could use empty words to get his desires.

But these damn vows.

Janus supposes that its because he isn't used to truth. But he wants too! But the truth seems to be avoiding him more then mouse with a cat.

Logan likes cats, he could never get one before because Patton's allergic. Should he even call Patton by his name? Wouldn't he call him dad now?

He allowed his mind to wonder for a short period of time. Elbows on the desk, hands pressing into his eyes.

This needs to be the truth and its not like he's low on love for Logan. Far far from it

They met when they were younger. Really really younger. He doesn't even remember it. But according to Virgil, Logan and him stared at eachother for five minutes before actually talking to eachother -more like babbling- after that they were practically inseparable. They did everything together apparently. Then they stayed friends for a long time. They barely even talked to eachother by the time that he introduced himself to Thomas. But...

But then Logan became a dark side. Logan started to unbutton the top of his polo. Logan stopped wearing the tie. Logan started to wear ice blue makeup. The Logan he knew as a child came back.

The Logan who loved science, bugs and books. Who loved ranting about old dead philosophers and Janus loved to listen. Logan loved old libraries and classical music. The Logan that used to watch Bill Nye as a child and knows the theme song by heart. The Logan that loved old myths and stories. The Logan who would go outside to the imagination and watch the stars and constellations for hours. His Logan

His favourite constellation was Perseus-

He has an idea.

----The Wedding Day----

Janus adjusted his suit for probably the millionth time. Running his fingers through his hair, attempting to make it lay properly. But only making the curls more wild.

Grumbling obscurities while trying to smooth down his damn hair, he heard low chuckles behind him.

"You know your only gonna make it worse, right Jan?" Virgil was leaning against the wall. His own hair absolutely perfect.

Janus sighed, "I know dad. But I just want my damn hair to lay properly for once! This is why I wear my damn hat-" the chuckles turned into full laughter.

"Logan will love you, no matter how your hair looks," Virgil stood up straight (HA) and walked over to Janus

He took a comb and started to go through his hair. Janus stopped growing by the time he was fifteen, so he was maybe at shoulder height with Virgil. "You need to stop worrying so much, and thats coming from me. Lo loves you more then the sun itself. Don't worry about something as silly as your hair."

Janus watched from the floor to ceiling mirror as Virgil expertly calmed down the mess of his hair.

Meanwhile.....

"Patton please stop crying. Your going to stain my suit-"

"BUT MY BABY'S GETTING MARRIED!!!" tears were still leaking down his face. He's been doing this since he came into the room -which was about twenty minutes ago-

Logan sighed, a smile apparent on his face as he patted his father figure on the back. "I know." he straightened his bowtie slightly in the mirror, "I just love him so much dad," Patton sat down in one of the dressing room chairs. A smile covering his entire face.

"Jan isn't really one to cry. But when I proposed to him? Tears just started leaking. I thought he was upset, so I went to comfort him," blush growing on his cheeks, "then he kissed me and looked me directly in the eyes and said yes." Logan felt a huge grin spreading on his cheeks against his will. He looked out of the mirror and back to his father. "He said yes."

Patton stood up from his seat and put his hands on Logan's shoulders, "and now its your wedding day. You two are going to get married and live out your lives being complete loveable nerds as you talk about philosophy and the stars and things I could never understand. You two are absolutely perfect for eachother and I can't wait to see where you two go next." while tears still shone in his eyes, the smile showed that they were of happiness.

They stared at eachother for a few minutes. Patton nitpicking small details to fix on Logan's suit.

"Janus the one walking down the isle right?"

Logan laughed softly, "yeah, he said it was a more dramatic entrance. Thats my future husband, right there"

Patton looked a little puzzled, "Can you even call him your future husband if the ceremony is starting in less then ten?"

"I mean, technically thats in the futur- wait. How much time was left?"

Patton blinked. Looking in the eyes of his son, "Ten minutes."

A look of panic shot through Logan. "We have to go!"

Logan grabbed Patton's hand. Pulling him out to the room. The celebration hall was stunning

It was outside, circle tables scattered around the clearing like the stars above scattered in the sky. A banquet table for the newly weds, their parents and their best men. The altar was covered in delicate fairy lights illuminating a soft glow. The shimmering stars above their heads shone brighter the usual. The constellations of Perseus and Andromeda were by far the brightest.

Logan stopped in his tirade to the altar. And simply looked at the brilliant view that the twins had put together for them.

For once in his life. Logan was speechless.

"They did a good job right?!?"

Logan was still looking around the meadow, amazed at every tiny detail. From the black dahilas that Remus insisted on including because of the famous unsolved murder, to the fairy lights climbing up the pillers that was no doubt Roman's doing.

"Its beautiful... How di-"

"The twins are a very creative bunch, kiddo!! We have five minutes until your wonderful groom comes out!" The other guests were starting to fill the room as Logan took his place at the altar. It was mostly figments that Thomas had made. Emile, Remy, The Critic, etc. They all took their seats and watched the meadow.

Logan walked over to his place next to the altar. Hands fidgety and resisting the urge to mess with the hair that he spent so long combing down. Roman stood at his side, while Remus waited at the other side of the altar for Janus. Before he knew it the music started to play, the quests rose from their seats, he felt his desire to stand straight. But none of those compared to when Janus walked into the room.

Janus walked in with Virgil latched on to his arm. A periwinkle blossem on the left of his chest. He still had his yellow gloves on -he really hated taking them off. Without the gloves, Janus couldn't lie- but he was without his hat. He was in a black tux with a yellow bowtie.

Logan couldn't think of anything else more beautiful. Logan couldn't think of anyone more beautiful then the side in front of him. Logan couldn't help the gigantic, ear to ear smile as Janus arrived at the altar and took his hands in his own.

The officiant -Who Roman just summoned from the imagination- cleared his voice and spoke to the whole room of people, "Friends and Family, we are gathered here today to connect two side's hearts and souls through this ceremony.

Logic Logan Sanders, Do you take this side to love and to hold, to protect and charish and to adore until the end of your lives?"

His smile growing wider, eyes sparkling with deep love and affection; Logan gazed into Janus' eyes, lightly squeezing his hands. "More then the sun and the stars."

The officiant smiled slightly before turning to Janus. "Deceit Janus Sanders, Do you take this side to love and hold, to protect and charish and to adore until the end of your lives?"

Tears shone throughout Janus' eyes. He removed his hands from Logans and for a second the blue side felt his heart drop, only for it to swell when he sees Janus remove his gloves and place his hands back in Logans. "More then every lie, secret and promise I have ever made."

The officiant turned back to Logan, "Please say your vows."

Logan felt his heart throb as he opened his mouth,

"Janus. In the very very long time that I have known you, I find myself falling more in love with you every day. I love how you laugh. I love how when you're tired you curl up to my side. I love how you stay by my side through it all. My translation from a light side to dark, my learning cerve to our new family, every dilemma from the others that we have to enviably fix.

Every night, every day, every hour, every minute, every second. You occupy my mind. And god Janus, I never want you to leave it.

I love you. I love you more then Perseus loved Andromeda." Logan's eyes were shining with unshed tears, he lightly squeezed Janus' hands. "I love you Janus and I can't wait to spend the rest of my life with you."

The officiant nodded, then he turned to Janus. "Please speak your vows."

Janus drew a shaky breath before speaking.

"Logan, I honestly don't remember when we met. You were my only constant, the unchanging variable that I could always fall back on. You were always there for me and I want to always be there for you.

I love you more then anything Logan. The way you light up when a new documentary comes out, drives butterflies to my stomach. When you laugh, I get lightheaded. When you smile, I get bolts of electricity to my heart. When you take me to the imagination for a date among the stars, I get so love drunk that things get dizzy. When you took me to our favourite place and got on one knee, I cried tears of joy.

There is nothing that I don't love about you. I've always found honest words hard to process. But believe me when I say that I've said no lies to you. You are the one person I will never lie to. I love you more then Andromeda loved Perseus," Janus looked up at Logan. The height difference apparent, but he smiled like he never smiled before. "I love you Logan. And I cannot wait to call you my husband."

The two sides gave eachother looked at eachother with pure adoration and love.

"Please put these rings on eachother."

They could hear Patton's loud sobs in the background as they slipped on the rings.

The officiant smiled wide, "I now pronounce you, Husband and Husband! You may now kiss your groom!"

They flew together like magnets. Logan grabbed the side of Janus' face to pull him closer, the earthy smell of cloves and plums filling his senses. Janus held Logan's arms and pulled him towards him. The kiss was far from chaste, but they pulled apart not long after to be met with......

"NOW YOU GOTTA STRIP AND FU-- OW ROMAN!!"

"NOT AT THE WEDDING YOU BABOON!"

The twins were a very chaotic bunch...

The wedding continued perfectly as planned. Then it came to the father-son dances.

Virgil as Janus were doing well. Virgil was giving Janus his best wishes and telling him how proud he was if him.

Patton and Logan??

Patton always cries at wedding to say the least...

Then it was their turn to dance.

Logan took his husbands hand and led him to the dance floor. It was lit by only fairy lights and the extra bright stars. They twirled and spinned and danced like they was only the two there.

The two battled for the lead before Logan won. Hand now in the swell of Janus' back and leading him in a very elaborate ballroom dance. Janus' scales glowing a bright yellow. Even over the music you could hear their laughter.

Patton and Virgil stood on the sidelines. Watching as their children had their fun. Virgil hummed slightly, "you owe me twenty bucks Patt."

Patton was very confused, he hadn't made any new bets recently or borrowed any money. "Why is that kiddo?"

Virgil turned and looked at Patton, "Ten years ago, you bet me that Lo and Jan would never get married. You owe me a twenty."

Patton grumbled slightly as he pulled a bill from his jacket pocket and handed it over. "This is the best bet I've ever lost then."

Virgil laughed, purple beginning to dust under his eyes. "You got that right," He took two glasses of champagne from the waiters walking by, "To our beloved children?"

Patton took the glass and raised it with Virgil. "To our beloved children." they then took a long sip and continued to watch as the couple danced.

The stars shining above, the moon full. They loved eachother more then Perseus and Andromeda.

-------

I. REGRET. NOTHING!!!

I also have 0 self control soo

The charcters are very ooc... But I don't overly care.

💙💛💙💛💙💛💙💛

#sanders sides #deceit sanders #logan sanders #roman sanders #virgil sanders #patton sanders #remus sanders #janus sanders #romantic loceit #loceit fluff #ts loceit #loceit #parental anxceit #parental logicality #ts logan #ts janus #ts deceit #ts roman #ts remus #ts patton #ts virgil #my writing

[afoxysunny]

Jives as High Duke

So Jives gets a second pick and oh my G did i struggle with choosing this one. In the end I'm pretty happy with the decision to give him the Monkey Miraculous

The whole story for how he ended up with having to pick a second time is already on the post about Stingy, who gets the Turtle from Jives, so I'll try not to repeat myself too much

So here are the references for this design

This design came out a lot simpler than it probably should be considering that it's based on the Chinese Monkey King but Jives isn't one for overly flashy and elaborate costumes in my opinion

Also, yes, again, his eyey should be blue but making colour changes to coloured pencil drawings is really hard, I'm sorry

Again, i just did what felt natural to me and in no time this was the outcome. Conclusion: drawing Jives comes very natural to me and i appreciate him for that

Design Notes:

Chest Pattern - i wanted to make the chest pattern here resemble the one he had as Grinder Turtle, this was also a big factor that sold me on giving him this Miraculous. I just think it looks really cool and it connects the two designs in a vague sense

Beanie - my boy Jives always wears some sort of hat, this is no exception. The Monkey Miraculous is a Crown and here it blends in so it now replaces the brim section of the beanie. On second thought it might be a little basic to choose a beanie but it just really suits him, i couldn't think of a better fit. Especially because it goes along really well with the headshape of the monkey i based him on

Toque Macaque - I'll be real with you, I'm not a huge fan of monkeys which makes them one of the few animal species i don't love and also makes the biggest reason i wasn't immediately happy to give my dear Jives this Miraculous xD I'm shallow i know. Anyways. I may not know a lot about monkeys but i knew enough to pick this macaque because the colours go well enough with the Monkey Kwami Xuppu and i liked the markings it has. [coicidentally this specific kind, the Toque Macaque, happens to share its natural habitat with the peacock ;)]

Tail - on his back you see how the rope detailing from his chest and pants combine into the belt and eventually the tail. I wanted the markings to kind of resemble a harness for climbing, i don't think it comes across too well though

Hair - the little bit you can still see of his actual hair coincidentally blends in almost seamlessly with the colour of his costume, that wasn't planned but i like it a lot

Reasoning:

At the point in time where i made the decision that Stingy would take the Turtle Miraculous from Jives i already had most Miraculous assigned to most other characters, in fact i was only really missing one for Ziggy. So spoiler alert i guess for him. I fudged around for a while between the Mouse and the Monkey, both would've worked well with either but in the end settled on the Monkey for Jives for multiple stupid timy reasons. For example the chest pattern i already mentioned, my ship-trash side going "a monkey and a peacock fit together way better aesthetically than a mouse and a peacock would", he and Xuppu would have a funny bro dynamic together etc.

Story:

I already explained why and how Jives loses the Turtle Miraculous to Stingy in my post about the latter so I'll just give a short summary here before moving on

As per usual Jives didn't eat much throughout the day and ends up fainting. This time it's a much bigger deal though. Usually he doesn't actually fully faint, just sway a little, maybe collapse but for the most parts he stays conscious just really weakened. That day the team of new heroes is fighting an important battle when he full on passes out in the middle of it. Luckily Stingy is able to step in to build their defense up again.

Obviously, instead of saying "i eat as little as possible because i have a problem" Jives just shrugs it off and goes "guess i didn't eat enough again, my bad guys, sorry" and thinks it'll be fine. He didn't expect Álfurildi, aka Sportacus, to take this very literal and announce that he planned on having them eat in his airship as a whole group anyway gor team moral and to make sure they're all healthy enough to actually handle a Miraculous. They deduce that must have been the reason Jives full on fainted this time, while going by his usual life he obviously didn't need as much energy as he now needs to be a superhero so the simple solution is to just eat more.

He makes excuses to not eat with the others as often as he can but one day he'd have to actively leave the others to do so as he already is in the airship with them when they start preparing to serve the next meal. That day he actually snaps at Sportacus that he just doesn't want to eat. Unfortunately, thanks to being such a gentle soul and also sensing Jives frustration and hunger Sportacus tries to comfort Jives with the worst thing he could've said. "heroes gotta eat well, so you can become big and strong" to which Jives absolutely loses it. He snaps at him "I'm already too big without eating anything, can't you just leave me alone!" and just jumps out of the airship. By now he already has Xuppu as his new partner so of cause he makes it down unharmed to run off into the forest. Sportacus wants to follow him but Robbie stops him. Robbie, who so far was pretty quiet and reclusive when the teens came to visit, says he will go find and talk to him taking Pixel with him as he is his best friend after all.

I'll spare you the unnecessarily details i cane up with and just say this is the moment Robbie gets to explain how the powers i gave him work and we get to see that he does really deeply care but just can't really express it. They find Jives and thanks to Robbie being able to relate to him about some of his insecurities and Pixel being a great friend he ends up confessing to them about his eating disorder. He never wanted to be the odd one out but never managed to fit in with the others. It's hard to hide you're different when you're towering over your peers so he figured if he just stopped eating he'd stop growing and though it had no positive effect on him he just couldn't stop doing it even after realizing how bad it had gotten.

Going back to the airship together once the situation calmed down a bit and with Jives' permission they let Sportacus in on this secret. As Robbie figured, the local health expert knows exactly what foods wouldn't upset such an empty stomach too badly and they start the process of finding a few good things for Jives to eat so he doesn't break down again.

Name:

Quick, something more lighthearted

When Jives gets his second pick for a Miraculous his eyes fall on the little Monkey, Xuppu. The two pretty quickly get along thanks to Xuppu being a jokester and Jives liking how bro-like they can talk and poke fun at each other. This turns out to be a great pick as this Kwami of Jubilation not only like shouting random noises around just like Jives but is also sassy and straightforward enough to remind him to eat every once in a while by poking fun at him using something Pixel once said to him "I'll not let you eat less than the Kwamis" (yes this part should've technically been in the reasoning section but you kinda need the context of the story for it so i put it here)

So Trixie explains that Xuppu's transformation and powers are based on the Chinese Monkey King (she knows that from the Guardians) but Jives really isn't one for flashy costumes and important titles so not only is his costume more basic than it probably should be but also he wamts to name himself "Duke". Stingy immediately objects "A duke is about as royal as a prince! You're completely underselling this concept. You have to trade with me! You get yoir turtle back. Let me be King!" Xuppu and Wayzz look at each other and roll their eyes, Xuppu then steps floats forward to say "well, he's not entirely wrong. Wouldn't you like to pick something higher?" so Jives chuckles and goes "High Duke". Again Stingy is outraged by this disrespect "that's ridiculous!" but Xuppu laughs and says "no, i like his style! Let's do this!" and so their new duo is established

Look, don't judge me, everyone headcanons Jives with growing not all legal things in his garden so now that he's actually a teen in my au I'm keeping it xD

Thank you so so much for reading so much of my rambling. You're so cool for taking the time to read this!

#Lazytown #miraculous ladybug #Lazytown au #Miraculous Lazybug #revive the lazy #jives junkfood #maggi mjói #Xuppu #Eating disorder #mentioned

[one-spidey-boii]

BUMMER SUMMER || peter parker; ch five

read ch four here

masterlist

an; sorry for posing so late in the day. i hope this chapter makes up for that. i love to hear your feedback!!

warnings; mentions of battle wounds (i.e. blood/scars/etc), future smut, mature language, fluff, angst, both peter and oc are 18+!!

word count; 2.8k+

edie's pov.

"this is pretty good." peter says with a little smirk on his face. his lips and nose are all i can see as he sits on the couch, still wearing his mask.

he takes another bite of mac and cheese before looking in my direction and shooting me a big cheesy smile.

once he came back i had to explain to him that i did indeed burn my hand on the hot pot of water, fully knowing he wouldn't let me live it down. luckily for me, i'm not the only one who had done something worth making fun of.

"at least i can let myself back into the compound without having to knock." i rebuttal and stick my tongue out at him, "and peter, take you mask off, it's weird watching you eat that way, just a nose and mouth and ew." i end my complaint with a fake shudder.

with an eye roll, peter pulls his mask off his head and takes a spiteful bite of his food. i chuckle at his behavior and excuse myself to the kitchen to clean up.

trying my best to keep my blistered thumb out of contact with anything, cleaning takes me a lot longer than i want it to. i'm about to start the dishwasher when i realize peter still has his bowl in the living room.

"you'd think mr. stark would have a robot to clean the dishes instead of-" i stop my sentence short when im confronted with an empty room, no peter. his finished bowl lay there on the coffee table, with the cheesy fork thrown messily next to it. with a grimace, i pick up after the boy and finally go to finish things up.

it's not like peter to be so...there one minute and gone the next. he's always the one to stick around after all the fun has been had and just, be there. but for the past day, he wasn't. and i know i shouldn't worry about it, being here specifically is stressful, but the more i repeat it over and over again in my head- the more it starts to sound like a really lame excuse.

i let my feet lead me back to my room, hesitating only slightly when i pass peters closed door. it's late, no use in trying to talk to him now. he just needs rest. we both do.

with that thought in mind, i make my way into my room, shutting the door behind me with a soft click. i'm already in pajamas, as i wasn't the one who went on patrol tonight.

my room is alarmingly blank. white walls, no pictures, no personality. at one point i plan to decorate it, and hopefully by then, peter will be comfortable enough to help me. a smile grazes my face when i finally sit down on the edge of my bed, it's comfortable, and i silently thank tony for providing the best for peter and i while we stay here.

i peer underneath the bed frame and pull out the black bag that holds my most valuable belongings. i unzip the top and pull out my utility belt, along with all my knives. i give an amused sigh as i think about people's reactions if they were to ever find these. i'll admit, i may have a few too many knives in my possession, but each one comes in handy every time i go out. and let's be real, you can't expect me to go around and pick up each knife i've thrown after every fight.

my ears perk up when a small creak comes from the other side of my bedroom door. the light in the hallway casts a shadow of two feet i can barely see through the crack along the floor. with my breath hitched in my throat, i slowly stand up to not make any noise.

i know the shadow behind the door is peter. and as i tiptoe my way over to the door, i keep a hold of the breath in my throat, so afraid to scare him away. he keeps moving his weight between his feet, causing the hardwood floors to creak with every adjustment. i move one hand to rest against the doorknob, the other barely skimming the white wood of the door. i let go of the air i’m holding and the movement on the other side halts.

i stop too, wanting him to knock or simply open the door. it has only been a day and the lack of interaction from peter is enough to pull on my heartstrings. much to my disappointment, his footsteps retreat back down the hallway and away from me for the umpteenth time today. leaving me to rest my forehead gently against the cold surface of the door.

peter's pov.

no part of me really wanted to leave edie after i finished my food. i wanted to stay and watch movies and tell her about my first night out. i wanted to see if her thumb really was okay. then the nagging part of my brain kicked in and suddenly i couldn't stand the idea of her walking back in the room, seeing me looking like the biggest idiot still in my goddamn suit.

it's small things like that that keep me from knocking on her door too.

i somehow find myself standing in front of her bedroom door. the time is almost past midnight and my hands are sweaty and oh my god there's a stain on my sweatpants and my hair probably looks a mess and i can't do this. i can't do this. what am i doing?

and then i know she's there. on the other side of the door, just waiting. waiting for me to do something, anything. i want to. i want to walk in and flop on her bed and just talk and smile and laugh at her bad jokes, but then she lets out a sigh. a sigh that tells me she's upset, or lonely. so i raise my hand to knock.

and i don't do it. i walk back to my room and close the door behind me.

-

a few awkward days into the future, i'm again- in my room. the past days rushed by as edie and i remained in our separate corners and patrolled when it was our turn, both afraid to make any sort of move, or at least, i was. small greetings in the hallway, eating dinner together in silence, and secret glances cast across the room were really all the contact we had recently. that was, until now.

she snuck up on me like a wild cat- stealth and agility giving her the upper hand as i made a peanut butter and jelly sandwich in the kitchen. just as i'm about to take my first bite, the entire thing is knocked out of my hand and onto the ground.

i snap my head up to see edie in her black suit, looking smug and proud of herself.

"no time for food, peter, we gotta train." she chirps at me with a smile that she tries her best to hide. i look between her and my ruined sandwich splayed across the floor, clear annoyance taking over my features. she chooses to ignore that, i guess.

"get that spidey suit on. meet you on the mat in five minutes," she calls out as she turns and runs for the training room. i let my eyes follow her figure until she's out of sight, only then do i turn to the mess on the ground and clean it up as fast as i can. i get ready faster than ever, eager to see what she has in store.

i slow down a few feet outside the door from my fast pace, not wanting her to think i'm too excited after she destroyed my afternoon snack. when i get to the room, she's nowhere in sight. looking back now, i don't know why i didn't see it coming.

with a soft grunt, she attacks me from behind and we both tumble to the ground, i'm trapped underneath her on my stomach as she holds one of my arms behind my back.

"gotcha." she whispers in my ear. i almost pass out right there from embarrassment, but i'd be lying if i said i'm not in the mood for some revenge for my sandwich.

i raise my free hand above my head and shoot a web that reaches the ceiling, pulling myself out from under her and away from her reach. with a sly smile beneath my mask, i taunt her, "come and get me now, wolfie."

then she does something i didn't know was even an option. she raises her arm and points it to the ceiling, a hook shoots out of her suit and clamps onto the concrete next to my head. with that, she propels herself upwards and grabs me by the ankle, ultimately taking me down.

now i'm overwhelmed by how bad i'm being beaten. i'm spiderman, why am i struggling so hard right now?

"i came prepared, parker. don't think i didn't learn from last time." edie teases as she walks around me in a wide circle. finally coming to kneel in front of me, she continues, "i have a proposal for you," she pauses to tuck a piece of hair behind her ear, "we'll fight, one to one, no weapons or webs, just us. first one down for ten seconds is the loser."

suddenly wanting out of this situation due to utter embarrassment, i speak up, "well, damn, looks like i've been down longer than ten seconds, i must be the los-" she cuts me off.

"no no no, we'll wipe the slate. get up, mr. parker." she offers me a hand, which i reluctantly take, "and to make it interesting- if you win, i'll go on patrol for you tonight. and if i win," she pauses again, eyeing me up and down, "you have to tell me why you've had a stick up your ass this past week."

my eyes widen, i clear my throat and try to come up with a cover story in my head, "wh-what are you talking about? there is no stick up my-" she cuts me off. again.

"save it, peter. there is a piece of wood stuck up your ass and clearly, it's making you a grumpy boy. and hey, you only have to share if i win." she says it with a look that makes me swallow thickly, but i keep my facade up.

"alright then, let's do this."

with that, she unclasps the utility belt that hugs her waist and tosses it to the side, flinching a little at the harsh sound of sharp pangs of metal hitting the concrete. i can't just take my web shooters off, considering they were a part of my suit, but i pledge to her that i won't use them.

the fight is on when she begins circling the blue mat slowly. i follow in suit, raising my arms in a fighting position. in the moments leading up to the first move, i watch her figure waltz along the outskirts of the mat, her hips swaying naturally with each calculated step she takes. her eyes are trained on mine, or at least the expressive ones on my mask.

she charges at me with fire in her eyes, swinging two punches, one left and one right. i dodge both of them easily, simply stepping to each side as her fists fly past my head. edie huffs heavily and moves on to taking jabs at my stomach, only able to hit me once, but i'd be lying if i said it doesn't throw me off a little.

of course, with that moment of weakness, she ruthlessly grabs my arm and flings me over her shoulder, a move i'm growing to hate coming from her. once on the ground, she sits on top of me, thighs pinning down my arms on each side as she begins to count, "one, two, three..."

with a gruff grunt, i flip my legs up and around her neck, knocking her off of me and to the side as i scramble away from her. getting back onto my feet, i pivot around to avoid another angry punch that comes towards my skull. she throws one more, and i catch it in my hand, stopping her movement as she stares at me with shock.

i twist her arm behind her back and push her down on her knees, she lets out a yelp that hurts my heart, until she picks up one foot and jabs me in the leg, making me let out a yelp of my own. edie is instantly back on her feet and this time she goes for my legs again, lunging towards me and tackling me once again, "get ready to spill your guts, parker," she teases. "three, four, five..."

a horrible, mind-bending wash of nerves washes over me and as she gets closer to ten, the more energy i gather to get the girl off of me.

"seven, eight, nine..."

before she reaches ten, i mindlessly grab her by the neck and flip us over, slamming her back into the mat with more force than i realize at the time.

i immediately begin counting in my head as i hold her there with my hand, my arm shaking, breaths loud and heavy.

one, two, three...

her eyes are locked on me, she's wrapping her hands around mine.

four, five, six...

she's clawing at my hands, her eyes desperate and...

seven, eight, nine...

she's scared.

i fling myself off of her. my breathing still ragged and it hurts my lungs with every shaky inhale. i can't meet her eyes. not after they stare into mine with the only emotion i never wanted to see.

she's scared. of me. and suddenly i can't breathe. i collapse back onto the mat with a shallow thud, staring at the ceiling with a foggy haze clouding my vision. it's silent for a while, aside from the sound of our bodies struggling to fill our lungs with air.

"okay. i'm gonna head out. to patrol." edie's voice is soft and airy. and my heart is broken.

-

she left earlier than technically necessary. our patroling hours were from dusk til whenever it felt right to leave the city. she had been gone for a couple of hours and the sun was just now setting.

after what happened, i laid on the mat in the training room for a long time, not able to move as i processed the previous events. eventually, i got up. with sluggish movements, i arrived in my room and successfully stumbled out of my suit and into my bed. that's what i'm doing now. laying in bed and listening to soft music play from my phone, hoping sleep will take over my body sooner rather than later.

i roll from my back onto my side to face the nightstand next to me. a small glimmer of light reflects off of a small piece of technology. my comm. with a sigh, i reach for it and nestle it in my ear before closing my eyes and slipping away.

"pete? peter, i need you to listen to me. please be listening." a small voice pleads in my head. i raise my hand and swipe at it, as if it's a fly buzzing in my ear.

"come on. let me know you're there." the voice sounds off again. this time i open my eyes and acknowledge the words and where they’re coming from. i shoot up in bed, now sitting straight up, wiping the sweat away from my brow.

"edie? i'm here, e." i mumble, not trying to hide the worry in my voice.

she lets out a breath, "oh, oh good. peter i need you to meet me at the back door, the one in the garage."

i nod and spring out of bed, wasting no time to do what she's asked. "pete?" she whispers. it's so soft and so frail in my ear. i gulp nervously at the sound of it.

"i'm coming, hun. almost there." i whisper back as i round the staircase that leads down to the garage. there, through the glass doors, edie stands. more like leans against the clear surface with a weary smile on her face. i watch as she raises her thumb to the finger pad and the doors slide open. i watch as she takes a few slow steps to meet me. i watch her hands as they slide down her left side, coming back up, covered in blood.

and i catch her as she falls forwards, right into my arms.

|| taglist; @my-patronus-is-mabel-pines @whycantileaveyou @lovewolfspirit

let me know if you wanna be added to the taglist :)

#shoutout to tom holland #tom holland #spiderman far from home #spiderman homecoming #peter parker fluff #tom holland fanfiction #peter parker smut #tony stark #holland #spiderman #chaos walking #marvel #avengers #avengers endgame #tom holland smut #tom holland cherry #tom holland fluff #peter parker angst #tom holland imagine #tom holland choas walking #peter parker #iron man #original character #happy hogan #peter parker x oc #bummer summer #one spidey boii’s masterlist #tom holland spiderman #peter parker fanfiction #spiderman fanfiction

[fluffychubbyrose]

Tony Stark x Chubby Self Conscious reader.

One Shot.

Requested.

Warnings- Slight Language, Slight NSFW so slight if you blink you'll miss it, Tony Stark might be more OC than some may like, insecurities, and light bullying.

(Also I don't own any of these pictures I just made the collages.)

Tony decided today instead of staying in the tower and relaxing, maybe having a movie marathon or something that we should go shopping to get me some more clothes since I keep telling him that I only have a few outfits to wear that are comfortable when he asks why I'm wearing the same outfits again and again.

The outfits are mostly my old sweats and sweatshirts along with a couple of baggy dress shirts and dress pants that I feel comfortable lounging around the tower or going out in, because they cover me completely and hide my plushness from the prying and judging eyes of other people.

I've been wearing the same outfits on rotation for the past month or two instead of wearing the new dresses or skirts I said I loved and fit good when he bought them for me, even when they were a bit snugger and showed more skin than I'd like them to. But at the time they seemed like a great idea to get because while they were a bit snug, they were beautiful, soft, and lovely material that highlighted my figure and bust. But lately I haven't been as confident as I was when I first got those outfits and wore them around and out and about.

But now looking at myself in these dresses, skirts, and tight shirts they just show to much of me and dont look right on my body anymore, they show too many of my rolls and plushness. "You need more than a measly few outfits to wear love and you know it. If those clothes we bought didn't fit comfortably you should have just said something and we could have gotten a different style or size for you that would have been more comfortable."

He says with a sigh not budging about going shopping and seemingly pouting that I didn't tell him about the clothes not fitting comfortably until now especially since some of the ones I'm refusing to wear are his personal favorites. "I don't think they have any bigger sizes." I muttered. "Hmm what was that?" "Nothing give me a minute to get ready and we can go." I said heading to our shared bedroom to put some light makeup on, tame my hair, and change out of my sweats.

Once I'm finished I walk out and over hear Tony talking to someone so I stay behind the corner to eavesdrop. "Yeah Y/n and I are planning on going on a quick shopping spree but I'll see if she wants to go to afterwards and meet up with everyone and maybe I can talk her into getting a new bikini while we're out to wear to the beach."

"Okay we'll see you there but don't try to trick her into wearing anything she isn't comfortable with Tony." I think that was Steve he was talking to and said "we'll" see you there so is the whole team going to be there? If it's just us that could be fun but last time the "private" beach we went to was anything but. Luckily I had my one piece on and could cover up with my towel. Tony takes any opportunity and turns it into a party. "Me!?! Trick her! Never!" He said sounding appalled making me giggle and reveal my hiding spot.

Knowing very well that he's always up to something and trying to get me to do all kinds of crazy things from experiments in the lab, to getting me drunk from the expensive alcohols that he loves but I can't really stand the taste of. Knowing I was busted I walked around the corner and kissed Tony on the cheek from behind. "Oh there you are Y/n! Are you ready to go sweetheart?" He asks smirking at me with playful look for catching my eavesdropping. "Yeah I'm ready."

(Small timeskip to the shopping center.)

"Oooh I like this one!" Tony says swinging around showing me a nearly see threw black button up shirt with a plunging neckline. "Tony that's basically see threw I can't wear that!" I said embarrassed cheeks heating up at the thought of anybody seeing me in something like that. "Yes you can, if you only wear it for me!" He says with a cheeky grin. I sigh and continue look it through the rack of clothes in front of me.

Most if not all of these clothes are way to small for me. I sigh and continue down the isle looking for cute but comfy clothes that won't hug my body. Which is proving to be more and more difficult with nothing being in my size, and with Tony only picking out provocative clothing. I'm feeling more discouraged and upset by the minute deciding to give up on finding anything today I turn to tell Tony let's just go to the bathing suit store to pick out a new bathing suit for the "not a party at the beach" he managed to convince me into going to.

Until I see Tony with an armful of clothes that upon further investigation are a bunch of outfits I wanted to get but were way to small for me to wear there must be 20 something outfits in his arms while he's talking to the sales associate. "Hi, yes I need all of these 3-4 sizes bigger." He says dumping the clothes into her arms. Looking closer it looks like he got the biggest ones of each outfit which would only need to be 2-3 sizes bigger to fit me well. "I'm sorry sir but these are as big as we carry and besides these would just be a waste on someone like her if that's who their meant for. I mean no offense but they wouldn't even fit like they were made to on someone of her size." She spat sounding irritated and disgusted not apologetic by any means.

"The way they fit, or look, are up to her to decide. Not you or anyone else and say something like that again and I'll have your job by the end of the hour. So again I would like all of these 3-4 sizes bigger so they are comfortable for my girl over there." He motions to me with his head looking as pissed off as he sounds, and the way he said 'my girl' was very possessive. My eyes widen and my face heats up from embarrassment from what she said and the confrontation in general but I'm touched and happy with how he's defending me.

"And if you don't have any bigger sizes then custom tailor it to fit. If you need her measurements I'll send them to you. Here's my card and I expect to be contacted by the end of the day with all of these resized and ready for pickup." The women looks deathly pale after taking and reading the card realising she just offended Tony Stark. Knowing that his threat to her job moments ago was in fact real and emanate if she didn't comply. Seeing her so petrified makes a part of me smug knowing next time she'll think before she speaks at least.

"Yes! Right away, I'm so sorry sir they will be ready by the end of the day! You can pay for them then. I'll be right back." She squeaks out and runs off with the clothes with her head down and tail tucked between her legs hopefully feeling as embarassed and upset as am from her comments. I wrap my arms around my self with head down now that she's gone I feel tears pricking the edges of my eyes hearing her say that just proved what I've been thinking about myself is true that I'm so big that it's repulsive to be this size, hell I can't even fit into a single thing in this entire store without it being tailored to fit, that should say something.

"Hey don't listen to her sweetheart she's just jealous I'm with you and not her. Everything she said was just a spiteful lie trying to get under your skin." He says lifting my head up and wiping under my eyes where a few silent tears slipped past without me knowing. He kisses me softly and hugs me tucking me under his chin while his hands rub up and down my back. I snuggle closer with my eyes closed holding him tight. "C'mon Y/n let's go pick out that swim suit!" He says sounding excited and let's go of me grabbing my hand and dragging me out of the store and down to the next trying to get my mind off of the rude sales associate.

(Another small time skip where we just arrived at the beach.)

"Hey you guys made it!" Steve runs up in just his swim trunks, hair wet, and sand sticking to him like someone pushed him down onto the sandy shore of the beach just moments before. "Yeah we're just gonna go set up our stuff then we'll join you guys in the water." Tony replies with his arm wrapped around me. Steve smiles and nods then runs off down the beach. I'm not sure about getting into the water looking around there's a lot of strangers here all swarming the infamous Avengers wanting to get pictures with them or of them.

The beach isn't packed but it defiantly isn't as dead as it should be if just the team was here, and I don't want a rerun of what happened earlier especially now that Tony talked me into a bikini after all. Though I picked it out and hid it from his view until I changed into it. When I put it on and it actually fit really well supporting me and being snug but not tight when I wasn't expecting it to fit at all with just how small it looked, I couldn't just put it back and pick out a different one. (It's the bikini in the pic above.)

But thinking about it now I should have picked a much less revealing bikini, but I knew Tony would appreciate the colors if you know what I mean. So I put it on in the changing room and put my clothes back on over it, only taking the price tags up to the cashier so I could pay for it and said I wouldn't let him see it until we got here because I was worried I would loose my nerve and pick out another one piece bathing suit after all. Plus I knew that if I let him see me in it that we would never make it to the beach and would more than likely be banned from the store. So he's been rushing to get here and to get me out of my dress shirt and knee high shorts since I checked out at the store. "Hurry Y/n I can't wait to get into the water!" Tony yells twenty or so feet away and winks at me suggestively, dropping our things onto the sand not bothering to actually set anything up.

"Don't lie Stark you only want to see her in her new bikini! You don't really care about getting in the water!" Natasha yells back at him from a ways down the beach playing volleyball with Wanda and few other people I don't recognize against the boys. Both of them wearing their own bikinis. 'That's probably how Steve got covered in sand.' "How did you know about that?" He yelled back pouting harder than he would willingly admit, because she's seen me in my new bikini but he hasn't been aloud to. Natasha stopped playing and said something to a couple of the people I didn't recognize that were on her team and walked up with Wanda right behind her.

"Oh don't get your panties in a twist Stark she sent me and Wanda a few photos wanting some feed back before deciding which swim suit to get." She grumped at him. "But trust me you'll like what she picked out." Wanda said with a knowing smirk. My face heats up when his gaze locks with mine. "Oh I never doubted that I wouldn't like it. Now come on let's get into the water that's the whole point of going to the beach." He said pulling on my hand. "Fine but I have to take these clothes off and I'm not comfortable just stripping on the beach and you have get changed to."

I say holding my towel close to me nervous about showing so much of myself in front of everyone, especially in front of strangers. Tony not needing me to tell him twice took off to the changing rooms with his swim trunks yelling for me join him. "No way or I won't get to swim today! I'll change and be out in a few." I say while walking towards an empty room. I strip out of my clothes and look at myself in the full length mirror they had in the changing room. Feeling insecure and like this was a very bad idea all of a sudden.

Seeing all of my rolls and stretch marks in plain sight is making me feel ugly and disgusted with my self. I'm about to say hell with it all and put my clothes back on and say I'm feeling sick and that I want to go home even though Tony will know its a lie and will be worried about me, I can't handle this, I'm not ready, this is to much. That's when Tony's voice comes through the door. "Almost done in their my beautiful girl? You aren't going to keep me waiting all day are you? I could just come in there and get you if you'd prefer?" He purrs out but sounds worried.

I hurriedly wrap my towel around myself and unlock the door but I don't make a move to come out. "I'm not sure I can do this Tony. This is a bad idea I wanna go home." I'm hugging myself again degrading and upsetting thoughts are rushing through my head making me so overwhelmed that I don't notice Tony's in the changing room with me until he wraps his arms around me from behind making me jump. "Where's all of this coming from? Is it because of what that lady said earlier because she's wrong, so so wrong baby girl your beautiful in everyway!" I cringe trying not to cry knowing what he's saying is true but I can't help but let what she said and what I've been thinking lately get to me anyways.

I whimper and turn around in his arms letting him hold me again. "I'm sorry I don't know what's going on I've been more and more insecure lately for no real reason. That's why I don't wear those clothes you bought me anymore, they fit but they show to much of everything I hate and I wanted to cover up by wearing my old baggy clothes." I pull back looking up at him. Tony's silent for a moment looking at me with a thoughtful expression. "Well we'll just have to fix that now won't we?" He smiles softly grabbing my hand and leaning towards the door.

"Tony no I really don't want to go out there not like this at least." I say pulling back and looking down. "Like what? Your all covered up by your towel. I cant even see that little swim suit you bought earlier that I've been dying to see since we left the store. I love every single part of your body but if you don't want to go out there we don't have to. We can go home or stay right here in this changing room. Hell I bet if I text Capsicle he'll bring us something eat and drink then we can stay in here all day." I giggled at that imagining a confused and flustered Steve coming to the changing room bringing food and water.

"There's my girl." Tony coo's running his hands up my sides trying to tickle me. "Hey hey, No, Tony, Dont you dare!" I squeaked out jumping back hitting the wall of the changing room realizing I'm trapped my eyes widen and I'm about to yell at him again when he launches at me tickling me and I don't feel my towel falling while trying to squirm away laughing until I feel Tony's bare hands on my hips and he stops tickling me. I look up worried about the sudden stop in his "attack" and his silence until I see the desire in his eyes.

"As much as I absolutely love this." He leans close to my ear his grip tightening on my hips. "I'd love even more to see it off and on the floor." He kissed my neck once he finished. Making me gasp as heat floods my cheeks. He mumbles into my neck. "How about I show you just how beautiful you really are." Pressing his body up against mine nipping the sweet spot on my neck.

Let's just say I never got to go swimming in my new swim suit and Steve got more than just an eyeful when he came to check on us because we forgot to lock the door.

@lilacprincessofrecovery