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idyllic-affections · 1 year

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invisible disability? it's rather visible to me.

summary. baizhu knows the struggle of maintaining a job while being chronically ill; as such, he is willing to offer an accommodating work environment for others who struggle like he does.

trigger & content warnings. angst (at first... it gets better i swear /lh), ableism, etc.

tropes, pairings, fic length, & other notes. hurt/comfort. baizhu & chronically ill!teen!reader, qiqi & reader. 1.7k words. they/them pronouns for reader.

author's thoughts. he's out of nonplayable prison ygs!!!!! can't wait to see his character stories for..... personal reasons..... anyways i want to specify that i am chronically ill. i am constantly fighting with my genetics to be healthy, its ridiculous LMAO

imagine baizhu employing a chronically ill, visionless teenager.

baizhu can easily say he's known their family for a long time, so he of course knows that they have trouble keeping a job. they often mention little things like that about their life during their visits with him. never once has he found anything wrong with them; they're always in virtually perfect health.

that doesn't change the fact that they're very clearly struggling. he's observed just how much they overexert themselves in a desperate attempt to actually keep a stable job, simply to help support their family, but all the exertion only seems to make their invisible issues worse.

also... they've been in his care for heat stroke more than once in liyue's warmer seasons. the heat is just far too much for their body to handle if they aren't careful.

"What the hell is wrong with me?"

Their voice was so quiet and whispery that if Baizhu hadn't been attuned closely to them at that moment, he might have missed it. They half wished that he would have. Based on the brief glance he spared in their direction, they knew he was listening. Oh well.

"I mean... really. This is ridiculous," they murmured, knees drawn up against their chest. "Everyone thinks I'm just dramatic. I'm not. I do fine for the most part, but then it just... gets bad for no reason at all... how am I in perfect health?"

By that point in their rant, his undivided attention was on them. Though his gaze was thoughtful, musing, they interpreted it differently and winced slightly.

"...Sorry. I really shouldn't be complaining like this in front of someone who's chronically ill."

"No, it's quite alright. You shouldn't minimize your pain. Your struggles are as valid as mine. I find your trust, your ability to confide in me, quite endearing, even," he reassured, unbothered, to which their shoulders seemed to lose some of the tension they harbored. "In fact... I've been thinking about this for quite some time now. Chronic illness may show itself in a variety of forms. Sometimes it may show itself in the form of your symptoms. Would you like to learn how to manage your energy better?"

the liyuean doctor basically hired them right then and there, but they don't really realize that for the first few weeks.

in the beginning, they're just... spending time at bubu pharmacy, learning how baizhu manages his own limited energy and applying those techniques to their own life (it works shockingly well). that's all!

it slowly turns into them helping out where they can—packaging herbs, learning what exactly each one of them does, delivering prescriptions to those who cannot physically get the medicines themselves... even when people start to question if they've found a new job, they remain oblivious.

it's one day while helping mince herbs that they realize they're basically a junior herbalist.

A soft hiss left their lips when the knife nicked the pad of their finger. They were quick to put pressure on the little cut, pulling their hand away from the countertop to prevent any blood from dripping onto it.

"It's best to get rid of those herbs," Baizhu reminded, stepping away from his own work to gently bandage their wound.

A small pout graced their lips. "I didn't get any blood on them, though..."

Amusement and the vaguest hint of fondness twinkled in his gaze. "We don't know that for certain, do we, now?"

"...Wait a minute." Their eyes narrowed suspicously at him, drawing their freshly-dressed hand back once he was done. "This isn't about energy management anymore, is it? Have I been... I've been working here this entire time. These tasks are very employee-like."

"Come, now. Don't look at me like that. You were looking for a stable job, and I am more than willing to accomodate your needs."

"You could've at least said something to me. I've been doing free labor all this time, and as a child, no less! Hmm... now, I do believe that is illegal in this part of Teyvat~ It'd be shame to get Ms. Yanfei involved~"

in the spirit teaching them to manage their energy, he often takes them on house calls with him, starting off to just homes in liyue harbor and later to homes all the way in qingce village. it's a good way for them to gain stamina and get a better understanding of their job.

baizhu has a tendency to smile through his own pain for the sake of his patients.

this habit slipped by unchecked until [name] came around.

whenever they feel like he isn't doing very well, they'll take over for him regardless of what he has to say about it.

herbalist gui is very thankful for them—baizhu hardly ever listened to him, but he does take better care of himself for [name]'s sake.

(he swears that baizhu is oddly parental when it comes to them, but he wouldn't dare mention the doctor's blatant affections to his face.)

"welcome to bubu pharmacy," they'd greet with a kind smile after unceremoniously shoving baizhu towards the back of the pharmacy where he could rest undisturbed, "unfortunately, dr. baizhu is currently out of commission, but herbalist gui and i would be glad to take care of anything you may need."

sometimes changsheng can be seen wrapped around their arm! usually it's their dominant arm, which is terribly inconveniencing. still, it would be an honor to be Chosen™ by their loved one's pet... if only she wasn't so mean to them.

"Hmph. You're terrible at cutting herbs. It pains me just to watch."

"Okay? Go back to Dr. Baizhu then? I'm not holding you hostage, Changsheng. You came to me," they huffed. "Also... maybe I'd be able to cut better if you weren't strangling my dominant arm. Just saying."

It's a few moments later that they're sulking, murmuring curses as Baizhu disinfected their fresh snake bite. Changsheng completely neglected to apologize until Baizhu had prompted her to.

(They would complain that he found that incident a little too funny if anyone were to ask them. It really hurt, you know!)

changsheng bullies them lovingly <3 she bites them affectionately <33

(not that she'd ever say that, though. baizhu knows. he just chooses to let her believe he doesn't know.)

qiqi becomes very attached to them very quickly, i think. she'd like having a nice older sibling around and would address them as such without even thinking about it. "jiějiě," "gēgē"... she can't really tell what gender they identify closer with and doesn't remember to ask, so she tends to bounce between the two terms of address.

she has an entire page in her journal dedicated to little things about [name] that she deems to be important. she notes down things they seem to like, things they seem to dislike, their birthday, other important dates, defining features...

she also keeps important warning signs related to health episodes of their's jotted down, like how when [name] stands still a little too long, qiqi should urge them to sit for a moment because they're probably either dizzy or having vision issues, or how when their hands begin to tremble, qiqi should share a sunsettia with them.

she does miss these signs sometimes... she does her best, though! qiqi only wants to help the sweet junior herbalist that braids her hair and accompanies her on her herb-picking trips and hugs her and says "i love you, please stop this task, you might get hurt" with so much genuine affection that it often overwhelms her :(

it's rare, but sometimes, there will be a customer or patient that has little tolerance for their disability-induced weakness or slowness.

because their illness(es) is(/are) invisible, very few people take their struggles seriously.

some people take this as an excuse to verbally and even physically abuse them.

baizhu does not take kindly to people abusing his employees, especially not his chronically ill teenage employee. especially not them.

"Is there an issue I can help with?"

They didn't mind being the only one at reception during the days Herbalist Gui was out, Qiqi was herb-picking, and Baizhu was otherwise occupied. It wasn't a big deal, really.

At least... not until someone particularly impatient decided to make their job difficult.

Baizhu never took kindly to such incidents; this one was no different. Based on his tone of voice alone, it wasn't hard to guess that he was livid, golden irises alight with rage. Even Changsheng had hissed in their defense at the sight in front of her eyes.

He'd come back just in time to see them flinch away from the raised hand of some foreign adventurer.

"This one—"

"And who said I was asking you?" he scoffed, sliding behind the counter and checking them for wounds. They were shaking, he noted, gingerly supporting a fraction of their weight in case they were to collapse. "I was asking my herbalist, [Name]."

Baizhu was a man of patience and, really...

He wasn't all that confrontational. Despite that, any semblance of the supposed cowardice he harbored was gone in an instant.

His scarred fingers drew soothing shapes on their upper arm as he led them into the back of the clinic, guiding them to sit on one of the beds before their legs could give out.

"Are you alright?"

baizhu takes very good care of them after stressful encounters because he knows very well that such high-stress emotional experiences will take a toll on their body.

whenever a wealthier patient comes in, they've learned to overcharge them on purpose even if it's for the most ridiculous of ailments; oh? you say you have been sneezing quite a lot and are having a hard time breathing? no, no, it's not springtime allergies, who told you that? it's quite dire, in fact, and the treatment price will be awfully expensive... oh? you'll pay it? wonderful!

^ herbalist gui says that baizhu is a terrible influence on them sometimes.

in their defense, they get hefty bonuses every time wealthy people pay ridiculous prices for typically rather inexpensive herbs (like a certain ginger harbinger did one time! they still giggle at the memory of him paying so much for so little). the more wealthy people pay, the bigger their bonuses (fatui harbingers are very wealthy...).

simply put, they make more mora than the majority of their family put together because of this morally dubious behavior.

baizhu, gui, qiqi, and [name] are a chaotic found family but yk what? they all make it work <3

please consider reblogging, it helps me out quite a lot!

#aphelion's headcanons 🌸#: [ the junior herbalist! 🌸 ]#baizhu x reader #platonic genshin impact x reader #platonic genshin x reader #platonic genshin impact #baizhu x you #baizhu x y/n #genshin imagines #genshin x reader #qiqi x reader #platonic qiqi x reader

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wordstro · 2 years

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[18] apocalypse + ex!san + "what else am i supposed to do?"

part 17 | masterlist | part 19

a/n: 5.8k words, warnings for mild su1cidal thoughts, guilt, mentions of murder, death, and violence. also a lot of introspection going on in this chapter. also gonna just say i really enjoy writing unlikely allies lol

you were prepared to die. you had prepared for it the moment you stepped out from your blood-splattered home with san's radio clipped to your belt loop and decided you would try to survive. you'd wondered once, long long ago, somewhere between cowering in silence in a beautifully impractical marble bathtub of an abandoned home in the upper end of gangnam and the quiet drip-drop of the leaky sink faucet and crouching under a rusty little sink in the bathroom of a rundown gas station at the outskirts of seoul for hours as you listened to the rhythmic thuds of a body slamming against the deadbolted door all night, whether survival was merely instinctual. you never thought you'd had so much fight in you until everything went to shit. something had to explain why you thought surviving was even worth it in a world as hopeless as this one.

you were always prepared to die.

as you come to, the sun's warmth on your face is the first thing you notice. the next is the aching pain curling through your body, the back of your head, your face. the last thing is the realization that you are not dead.

why are you not dead?

you shoot up too fast, and your head spins at the feeling, nausea making you groan. your hands shake as you blink away sleep and sun. you're hungry and dehydrated and exhausted and alive.

someone clears their throat.

you whip your head in the direction of the sound, scrambling away immediately, only to -

"mrs. kim?" you croak out, coughing to clear your throat as you stiffen at the sight of her. a blackened bandage is wrapped around her head, her cheek bruised and her lip cut.

your eyes dart around you, but you're not back at the sanctuary. you're on a bed of grass in front of a small cabin. mrs. kim sits in front of an unlit firepit. her rifle sits at her feet. you stare at it. she places her foot on top of it, and when your gaze flickers back to her face, she is staring at you with an unreadable expression.

she fiddles with her hands, an awkward gesture you've never seen from her before. she chews on her bottom lip as she quietly observes you.

you're too tired to continue sitting up, so you let yourself flop back down on the grass. it's soft enough, and the gentle earthy smell of morning dew is kind on your senses. it's a comfort you hadn't felt in so, so long, and the way your body melts is almost disconcerting. you stare at the green foliage above you, the clear blue sky, the fluffy, picturesque clouds floating on. birds sing to each other. it reminds you of Before. maybe you are dead. your voice is hoarse as you speak without looking at mrs. kim, "where are we?"

"five kilometers south of the sanctuary," mrs. kim responds, her voice as soft as the breeze curling around your cheek. she speaks to you as if you are a small rabbit who will run at the first sign of loudness. it's funny, almost. she's always been loud in the sanctuary, as the sanctuary's resident nosy gossip. she'd never been considerate of such things. her voice always echoed through the halls. when you worked quietly with jongho folding laundry, you could hear her laugh from the guard towers or the sounds of her scolding someone from the sleeping quarters. oh.

you blink at those thoughts. the sanctuary.

you've destroyed it, you remember. you've destroyed everyone in it - aliens and humans alike. you can hear the bomb blasts in ringing in your ears. you can feel the heat of the flames against your skin. you can see yeosang pulling san away. oh.

you think of all the people who weren't guards, the children. that's when your hands start trembling. their deaths are on your shoulders, whether you want to admit aloud or not. maybe that's why mrs. kim is here. like the grim reaper, she's waited for you to wake up so you could watch as she killed you for destroying her home and killing her friends, aliens and humans alike. you want to hate the idea, but you think maybe...you deserve it. mrs. kim's voice rings in your ears, "i stayed here on one of my solo runs once."

you crane your neck to look her straight on. as you observe the lines along her eyes, the wrinkles around her mouth, the gray strands of hair peppered along deep black, you are reminded of the woman you'd imagined was talking over the radio airwaves you'd clung to after you'd escaped seoul. mrs. kim looks older than your mom had been, and the thought subdues the irritation clawing at the underside of your skin.

you don't comment on any of it, or what she said, though. you only ask, "is it gone?"

she frowns at you, "is what gone?"

"the sanctuary."

mrs. kim closes her eyes, and the pain there is something you think will remain etched into your brain for eternity. the only other time you've seen such utter grief was when you'd told him to get into the car. when it clicked for him. it is the same kind of loss you saw on -

mrs. kim nods, "it was still burning when i dragged you out of there. it's probably a pile of ashes by now. everyone was...the sleeping quarters was the first to go."

you bite your tongue so hard, you taste blood.

"why would you..." you clear your throat, eyes fixed on mrs. kim, "why would you save me, then?"

her eyes flicker over your face for a long, long time, "i wanted to get at least one person out."

you blink. a guilty conscience, you know, can make people do the strangest things. it has you sitting here entertaining mrs. kim.

mrs. kim sighs, "i'm sorry."

it has mrs. kim apologizing.

her brows are furrowed with sincerity. her eyes hold yours for just a moment before she lowers her gaze. is she apologizing for how you were treated in the sanctuary? or is she apologizing for not letting you die?

mrs. kim nudges the rifle with her toe, a small tap at first before she kicks it towards your outstretched form. she pulls out a flask from the inside of her jacket. you watch her warily as she takes a large gulp, wiping her mouth with the back of her hand before she leans across the space between you both and places the old silver flask next to the rifle. next to your hand.

she cranes her neck, admiring the clouds and foliage above you both. the sun illuminates more gray strands, a cloud-like halo over her that gives the impression of an angel. it's funny, you think, because neither of you are anything of the sort. the proof is in her black-blood stained bandages. the proof is in the blood you have on your hands, visibly dry and invisible.

she clears her throat, "my world ended long before the world actually ended. it was the first time my husband hit me..."

maybe it's the pain, maybe it's the disappointment of finding yourself alive still, maybe it's hongjoong and yeosang and everyone else speaking into existence that you are just like them, horrible and mean and self serving, maybe it's the near death experience, maybe you're just super fucking tired. maybe it's something else. but you let out a small groan, cutting off mrs. kim mid-sentence. she trails off, her lips pursed as she frowns down at you. the halo of sunlight is gone, and she is just the nosy, old woman you've known all this time.

you match her frown, rolling your eyes, "how is this relevant? so you were abused, and then you finally gave him the death he deserved? why does that matter to me?"

mrs. kim lets out the smallest of laughs. "san told you."

you barely hide the flinch at his name, choosing instead to close your eyes and let the sun's warmth on your face comfort you once more. "he mentioned it."

"he helped me with this."

you turn your head and peer up at her. she's pointing at the bandage wrapped around her head. you stare at her until she squirms in her seat and fiddles with the bandage around her head. your mother would have berated you for your rudeness towards an elderly person, but you can't help it. everything about mrs. kim is irritating. her ignorance. her saving you. her mentioning him so casually. her looking at you as if she understands you.

"so what if he did? why should i care?" you finally break the silence.

"i joined seonghwa's guard because i didn't believe people could be good. the alien gave me...power. at least that is how seonghwa described it. that's how it felt. i lost everything when i finally dragged that my pig husband to seonghwa, and seonghwa gave me a reason to keep living."

your heart curls at her shaky tone, but you mumble, "you still haven't answered my question. why the hell should i care? what is your point?"

mrs. kim lets out a dry chuckle, dragging her hand over her wrinkled face, "i used to have children. they left me long before the apocalypse ever happened - another thing my husband took from me. they - they had their own children and i…but... i look at san. at seonghwa and hongjoong. at you. and it reminds me of what i lost. all i can think of is how sorry i am."

"you feel sorry?" you let out a small laugh, "finally."

"huh," mrs. kim snorts, "maybe i should have left you back there."

"why didn't you?" this time your voice is not soft. it's loud. it's angry. it's a tightness in your breath and the heaving of your chest and this visceral, bone deep anger that makes your thoughts disappear. it’s suffocation in ways you've never felt before. as you lay in the dirt and crane your neck to glare at mrs. kim, it is not just anger. it is fury. it's the sharp pain at the back of your head. it's the way your chest feels hollow. it's everything and nothing all at once. it's everything you've pushed away to deal with later finally coming to surface. it's nothing because mrs. kim is a fucking stranger, and you're disappointed she isn't someone else.

mrs. kim doesn't answer. she just opens her mouth and closes it, once, twice, before she clamps her mouth shut and remains still as stone.

you laugh, and it sounds maniacal even to your ears. your chest rises and falls too fast, your breath growing more ragged. too fast. you sit up once more, ignoring the way your head spins and your vision blurs. your fingers curl around the cool metal of the rifle, and you lift it. you point it to her, and the barrel sits inches from her chest. she is so close.

she merely stares at you.

"is this what you want?" your fingers shake, and breathing hurts, and you are so so angry, "for me to make you stop feeling sorry? to shoot the fucking guilt - because that's what this is - out of you?"

mrs. kim's eyes fill with tears. you would know wouldn't you? what she’s really feeling? guilt recognizes guilt, and the guilt in you rises like bile. mrs. kim nods, and nods, and nods, and she says, "my home is gone, y/n. i've lived too long, while - " she closes her eyes, and her breath comes out in a small shudder, one that has you clutching the gun tighter, gritting your teeth. mrs. kim shakes her head, her eyes hard, "i have nothing left to my name but this guilt. what else am i supposed to do?"

for a moment, her words hit the deepest parts of your chest. for a moment, you resonate with mrs. kim. you never thought you would. you've never wanted to. what else are either of you supposed to do?

you have nothing left but guilt either. for a moment, the bunker settles in your mind. the living room, with its books and raggedy couches and warmth. but that is no place for you. that was never a home for you, and it never will be.

now here you are. you've taken mrs. kim's home from her, however horrid of a home it was, however horrid she had been to you, but she saved your life. now, as you look at her, with the gun in your hand and the determination in her eyes, you realize that even that act of hers was transactional, as all things are in this new world. you destroyed her world, she saved you, and now you owe her a favor. now she wants you to put her out of her misery. the thought has you shaking your head vehemently.

you're sick of the transactions and the calculations. you're sick of it all. you bite out, "you're supposed to live with it."

and you don't know if you're talking to mrs. kim, for all the times she turned her cheek on you, for all the times she let people die for seonghwa, and for how she is practically begging for an easy way out, or if you're talking to yourself, for killing innocent people in order to save someone who you're unsure would even be happy to see you if you showed up at his doorstep. maybe he would be happy to know you aren't dead, but you don't even know if you'd be safe with his friends and him knowing you are still alive. even if he somehow convinced his friends to let you stay in the bunker, to no longer be on your own, you wouldn't be able to spend a single minute in that bunker without looking over your shoulder for a scheme against you. in fact, you could lie here, in the grass, and wither away. but you're supposed to live with it.

"i'm not going to do the dirty work for you. if you want to die, then do it yourself. i don't fucking care how." you say, dropping the rifle into the grass between you both. your tone is harsh, even to your own years, but you do not care. you will not be made to follow other's whims any longer. you look mrs. kim in the eye as you say, "just leave me the fuck alone."

you snatch the flask and take a drink, your throat dry.

the sting of the alcohol is sharp, burning as it curls down your throat. you cough at the burn, the sound of your cough echoing throughout the clearing.

mrs. kim speaks, her tone bland, a small, wispy thing, "that's vodka."

you glare at her late warning, slamming the flask on the ground as you flop back in the grass and close your eyes.

you lay there under the warmth of the sun and try not to listen to mrs. kim's soft, retreating footsteps, or the sounds of the porch wood creaking under her weight as she trudges up to the cabin, or the way her soft sobs harmonize with the sounds of the chirping birds.

~.~.~.~.~

mrs. kim does not leave you alone. the rifle remains propped beside the cabin door. it's a glaring, tempting thing, but it sits untouched for days upon days. when the morning sun rose to its highest point, the heat became too unbearable to lay in the grass, so you'd made your way into the cabin. the wood groaned under your footsteps and you winced at the sound of the front door swinging open as you stepped into the cabin. even then, mrs. kim did not look up at you. she just continued beating at the dust-covered blankets she'd pulled from the broken closets.

it becomes a morning routine of yours after that, to lay in the grass every morning for hours before heading back into the cabin, all while mrs. kim busies herself with some kind of task she'd silently deemed helpful and you silently thought was pointless.

the cabin is dusty and rundown and smells of rotting wood, but there are two beds and a torn, surprisingly comfortable sofa, and dusty moth-eaten linens, and wood to cover up the windows, barricade the doors at night, and light the fire pit outside. neither of you speak to each other, aside from asking about food or to pass a candle, and maybe you've been alone for too long, even in the sanctuary, because you find solace in her quiet company even if you mentally prepared yourself not to.

a week passes. and then another. and then another and another and another.

time runs together, until months pass. at least you think it's been months. the two of you spent a long, long time gathering berries and living off the food mrs. kim swiped from the sanctuary when she ran. the rifle left its designated, mocking spot beside the door only when the two of you attempted to hunt for squirrels and rabbits and failed miserably. neither of you discussed the possibility of going into town. or even going five kilometers back to the burnt down sanctuary and swiping food from there. you'd thought about it, but it felt too much like robbing a grave. you hadn't been above it before, but you think mrs. kim is, unexpectedly enough.

you spent too long lying in the grass every morning and enjoying the warmth of the sun, until the leaves started to change and the weather got cooler. for the first time in a long time, you'd started getting a full night's sleep. without hongjoong banging on your doors, and with the doors and windows barricaded so securely and the way you two were in a cabin alone in the woods, you could sleep.

mrs. kim took swigs from her flask of vodka too often. you slept on your side the nights you couldn't sleep, facing the door, listening to the clicking sounds filling the forest, while the rifle remained propped in its spot beside the door. you'd suggested once that mrs. kim hold onto it at night, but she'd refused. if either of you noticed that neither of you took weapons to bed, that neither of you stayed very alert despite the clicking beyond the door, that both of you knew damn well that neither of you would care if something burst through that door and killed you, despite the fact that every night you both barricaded the doors and windows like clockwork, you didn't talk about it. after all, you were prepared to die, right?

sometime between the grass and foliage in the clearing no longer being green and the need to find sweaters to stay warm, you start going into town for food and supply runs. the towns are as empty as they used to be, when you used to be alone, but you have someone to help you carry things back. you have footsteps joining yours.

you're not the same as you used to be, and sometimes you wonder if that's a good thing. it hit you, you think, the day mrs. kim pocketed a pack of cigarettes as you both passed by an otherwise ransacked convenience store. mrs. kim grinned as she waved the only pack left in triumph. you'd opened your mouth to tell her off for falling into the habit of smoking in the first place - so many things here could kill you both, and to die from something as small as a cigarette would be a waste - when a bloodcurdling scream echoed through the otherwise empty town. it sounded desperate, the scream curling into a sob. it was a distant thing. but not distant enough. both of you started moving then, remaining near the walls of the convenience store, covered from view, as you both made your way to the exit.

"what -"

the cry of help stopped mrs. kim dead in her tracks. it was a wail, really, one that reminded you so very distinctly of your time at the sanctuary. maybe that's why you kept walking, and why mrs. kim hesitated. maybe that's why you grabbed her arm, tugging her along behind you.

"we need to keep moving," you said, without looking back.

mrs. kim's disapproving frown was an annoying thing. and when you'd both made it back into the forest, leaving the cries for help far behind you, when you both made it back to the little cabin and you sat on your bed while mrs. kim cleaned the rifle on her bed, it'd hit you how much you'd changed. if this was you from months upon months ago, you'd have stopped to at least see what had happened. you'd done as much for yeosang and mingi.

you'd changed so much, but maybe that was for the better.

at the very least, it's not so lonely anymore. besides, helping people only brought trouble in this world.

~.~.~.~.~

"why did you help me?"

you probably should have asked mrs. kim this a long time ago. rain trickles over the cabin porch's overhang, and the world is a dreary, tired place, more so than it ever has been before.

mrs. kim hums. you watch her take a drag of her cigarette. the end glows a bright red-orange. it reminds you of the setting sun - a signal of impending doom, of aliens lurking the thick fog at night. white smoke trickles from her mouth. you pull the blanket tighter around your shoulders as you watch her. you'd never admit that the smell is comforting. it reminds you of clubs and bars and walking the streets full of people, of honking cars. it reminds you of Before.

she says, "i owed san."

you'd grimaced at his name. you can't ever really hide your reaction to his name, but mrs. kim never comments on your reactions anyway. "he said you owed him a favor before too. what the hell could he have possibly done for you?" you glare when mrs. kim blows more smoke into the air, "and when are you going to stop smoking?"

"do you care about my health that much?" mrs. kim lets out a small, tinkling laugh.

"no," you gag, "never."

"right." she smiles, but she puts out the cigarette anyway. she clears her throat, though the sound is more of a hacking cough, and she stares out into the gloomy forest, the pitter-patter of rain filling the silence for a moment before she says, "san knew my granddaughter. they were in a group together a few years back. i wasn't able to see her very much before all this, but my son sent me letters about her after she was born. he’d stopped eventually though, when my husband caught on.”

you frown, "how do you know he wasn't lying?"

you want to sound vindictive, skeptical. but you just sound tired.

"he told me stories about her. the night shifts got long, and the chore shifts got boring. i don't think he was lying. the details of those stories were -"

mrs. kim drags a hand through her hair. thunder resounds overhead, the sound making you jump.

“he wasn’t lying.” mrs. kim says, "he told me he wasn't able to save her, and he regretted it. i could see on his face just how much he regretted it, so i couldn't get angry with him."

you want to ask questions, you want to know details, but you also don't think you can handle listening to the horrors of mrs. kim's granddaughter's death. not with the way her eyes look so far away, so glassy, and the way her fingers twist in her lap.

so you keep quiet, watching as mrs. kim sighs, and says, "i got to know her through san's stories, and i'll always owe him for that."

there's a long drawn out silent. he'd mentioned that he let people die before. is this what he - no you don't care. you don't care about him or his motives or his past. you frown at mrs. kim, "what does owing him have to do with helping me?"

mrs. kim just laughs.

you glare, "i'm being serious."

mrs. kim just cackles as she gets up and strides into the cabin. you glare after her.

~.~.~.~.~

you are seated on your bed with a tattered book you found in one of the drawers open in your lap when mrs. kim hands you a flickering candle and says, "i want to go to the sea, i think. i've never been."

"really? never?"

mrs. kim places a hand at her waist, and waves her other hand, "a poor old woman like me was never rich enough to travel."

you laugh. mrs. kim smiles, but it does not quite reach her eyes, and your stomach churns at the way silence falls between you both.

the sun has set long ago, and you can almost pretend the clicking outside is merely the sounds of the crickets chirping. in the many months that you'd lived in quiet peace with mrs. kim, you didn't think you'd grow this attached. the sinking feeling in the pit of your stomach is something you didn't think you'd feel in a long long time, especially not for someone like mrs. kim.

you should have known she'd find a way to make you care about her. she was nosy, and annoying, and had a tendency to make morbid jokes while cleaning that damned rifle, and liked to rub the fact that she saved your life in your face when she was annoyed with you, and the night after you woke up and told her to leave you alone, she tossed a blanket at your face without a word. two days later, you watched her massage her feet, wincing as she did so, and you'd tossed the very same blanket she threw at you at her face. mrs. kim only snorted in response, and you'd smiled. you should have fucking known.

"would you like to join me?" mrs. kim's eyes are hopeful. her wrinkled expression softens as she looks at you.

a part of you wants to go. this cabin is no real home, and it does not feel like a home, because you're an idiot who makes homes of people not places. people are not built to be homes. they are unstable and flighty and they do not stay, and you've made your home, your bed, with someone else a long time ago and it's not mrs. kim and you hate yourself for it. for the first time since the world went to shit, you think you've felt truly content here. happy, even, you could say.

"the sea sounds nice," you said, but you didn't move.

sure, this place was not your home, but it's a home, and you are so, so tired of wandering. you're tired of the uncertainty. you're tired.

"but you don't want to go." mrs. kim states, rather than questions. she knows you too well. that is most annoying of all.

you say, "i'm tired of traveling all the time."

mrs. kim sighs, "you're going to be alone again. are you sure you want that?"

you'd also told her too much about yourself, those days you spent lying in the grass or when neither of you could sleep so you lay awake and told each other stories about yourselves.

"are you sure you do?"

mrs. kim coughs, and the sound is too full, to rough. she says, "i want to see the sea."

"then i want to stay," you tell her, with a roll of your eyes.

"alright." mrs. kim smiles at you, and it's the kindest smile you've seen in a long, long time. "this is a nice place. make it pretty then."

it's strange, you think, that of all the people who you've encountered since you're returned to the world from your wanderings, mrs. kim is the one who seems to understand you best. not past you, or a version of you they're so hellbent on perceiving. mrs. kim just sees you for who you are here and now. despite hearing your stories from the past. despite the way you've spoken to her. it's strange to think you'll miss her.

"you can visit whenever you'd like," you say, knowing damn well she's never going to come back. not with that cough. not with the way her eyes grow far away at your words.

she raises a brow, "i thought you wanted me to leave you alone."

you roll your eyes, "or you can do that, too."

mrs. kim laughs, and you help her pack her things.

the next morning she pats your head so gently, tears spring to your eyes. at least until she tells you you need to brush your hair.

you lean against the cabin door, watching as she shoulders her backpack and hobbles out of the cabin. the keys to the vehicle she hid a kilometer out - the same one she used to get both of you out of the sanctuary when it burned - jingles in her fingers.

she sighs one last time as she looks at you, and she asks, "you'll be fine?"

"of course i will. you should worry about yourself.”

she nods as she turns away, and you stay at the door until you can't hear her footsteps or see her any longer, until she disappears into the foliage of the trees, and you can pretend that she wasn't even there to begin with. the sun is unusually warm on your skin, but the breeze makes goosebumps run down your spine, so you shut the door behind you and sit on your bed.

despite your insistence, mrs. kim left the rifle behind, lying precariously beside the cabin door.

i don't have much of a need for it, she'd said with a shrug.

of course you'd be fine, you knew. you'd done this before. but you sat in the empty cabin for far too long, staring at the rifle all the while.

~.~.~.~.~

it takes a week for you to go into town on your own for supplies. usually, you and mrs. kim head east, far, far away from the sanctuary. this time, you head west, a knife tucked in your boot and rifle strapped to your back. the walk is a bit longer, but you quickly come upon a small gas station and a few dilapidated stone homes that look promising.

the first house's floor is covered in glass from the windows. each step is accompanied with the crunching of glass under your foot. the family pictures are all on the floor, shattered or torn or both. you take great care not to look at the pictures too closely.

you find the kitchen quickly, shuffling through the pantry and cabinets. you don't find much, aside from a few cans of food that you pocket. you move quick, and you find you miss the small conversations you and mrs. kim would have during these runs.

the second house has a purple piece of cloth tied around the doorknob. you'd never seen it before. it reminds you of the orange sanctuary flags from long ago. something about that makes alarms go off in your head, but the sanctuary is gone. it's burnt. these aren't orange.

still, your skin crawls too much, and your heart rate is too high, so you skip that house, heading to one other tiny house with withering flowers surrounding the entrance. you go through the pantry quickly, grabbing anything that looks relatively edible. it's not a bad haul, but you've had better.

the hairs at the back of your neck still stand on end, so you decide that's enough for the day.

as you're headed back towards the winding path that leads up into the forest trail you'd taken here, you note another purple flag hanging from one of the broken windows of the abandoned gas station.

as you're staring at it, you hear a snap. a footstep. you spin, ducking under an abandoned car.

you hear voices. you crouch behind the abandoned car, and spot two small figures speaking in hushed tones near the first house you visited. you can't make out their conversation, but you notice the bulging backpack on one of their backs. the other one is limping, clearly injured as they cling to their friend. the one with the bulging backpack is using most of their strength to hold the other up.

a part of you says to run. another, bigger, louder part thinks, easy targets.

you don't think about it. you don't think about what that says about you, either. you only staying crouched and hopping from abandoned car to abandoned car as you quietly sneak up on them.

you don't think about it when you yank the one with the bulging backpack back so hard, they topple over, and the limping one cries out in pain as they collapse, and you immediately draw the knife from your boot, pressing it to the backpack person's throat, putting all your weight on their back so they're pinned to the ground.

you tell the injured one, "move and i slice your friend's throat."

the injured one's head snaps up, a quick movement that startles you, and - and -

"y/n."

you nearly drop the knife at the familiar voice. nearly. your fingers tighten around the knife in your hand, digging a bit further, and the person in your grip gasps in pain.

you glance down at him, and you groan, "fuck."

your gaze flickers from the person in your grip to the injured person staring at you as if you've risen from the dead. you couldn't blame him, really. you pretty much have. how long has it been since that day?

still, your gaze continues flickering back and forth from yunho to wooyoung.

wooyoung snorts when your grip on him tightens, a trickle of blood running down his chin where you hold the knife, amusement dripping off his voice, "we really can't keep meeting like this, y/n."

yunho drags a hand through his hair and sighs.

#ateez angst #ateez scenarios #san angst #san #ateez #itpfl

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cptspiegel · 2 years

Note

Bleach guys fluffy relationship he's please? (Ichigo in particular)

Hi!!! I hope you enjoy :) 💙

Warnings: mention of injuries/bandages, lots of tags, my love for soft Ichigo on full display

Ichigo Kurosaki

Our man is really respectful and tries to do the traditional thing of letting you sleep in his bed and he take the couch on nights that you sleep over. Not that he doesn't want to be close to you, Ichigo just doesn't want to deal with his dad's perverted questions and praise.

Can he commit to that decision? Absolutely not.

It's probably just past midnight when he sneaks into the room.

"Good, you're awake." Ichigo would say even if you were completely knocked out.

He's so great at spooning. Like so good at it.

Man has such long arms and he holds you so close too himself that his arm almost wraps around you twice.

Don't think he won't sneak out to come see you!

If your window is low enough Ichigo would go right up to it.

"What are you doing?"

"I missed you. Now let me in it's freezing out here!"

Post fighting, Ichigo only wants you to bandage him up if possible. Some things need to be handled by a professional, but the usual scrapes and bruises he wants treated by you.

For many reasons. Mainly because it's an excuse for you to touch him and you're so gentle about it he loves it.

Not to mention he'd be all, "I just fought for my life! Least you could do is give me a kiss!"

It takes forever to get him fully taken care of because all he really wants is to have you in his lap and kissing him.

Byakuya Kuchki

Beautiful and intimidating. That's what Byakuya is on the surface.

And it's unnerving to have him watch you any time you're within his sight.

Everyone tells you that he looks at you with admiration, but how would they know when his face never changes??

It's so true though. Byakuya wants to approach you, but you know how it is in the court...everyone's always busy! He has to watch you closely to see when you're free!

That's why he shows up randomly to your quarters. (Something he makes a habit of until you inevitably just tell him you'll move into his.)

"Captain." You greet him with a bow.

"Do you think I'm handsome?" He asks in the most casual tone you've ever heard. If you had tea in your mouth you would've spat it out.

"Uhm...yes. I think you're very handsome Captain."

He's closed the space between you now and reaches his hand out. "Let me treat you to dinner."

Did I mention when you're standing behind your own captain Byakuya is nkt paying attention to a single word that's being said.

"Captain Kuchki, I hope you've heard what is to be expected of you."

Byakuya doesn't even break eye contact with you, but agrees. "Of course. It will be done."

He's a man of few words so his love language is physical touch.

Some may consider it bad for his image to have his hand wrapped around yours all the time. Could possibly make him look "soft".

But who is going to tell him otherwise?

You often give his hand a squeeze to let him know you're fine and don't need him to step in.

Heaven bless anyone who shows you disrespect.

Shinsui Kyroaku

If anybody values quality time it's this man.

Hes also not afraid to show his affection in public.

"There's my sunshine." "How was your meeting my love?" "Stunning as always I see." "You light up my world."

All of that said within 30 seconds of seeing each other. It's almost embarrassing.

At home, you wear his favorite kimono. You want to obviously, but Shinsui also asks you to.

The reasoning is that you make it a good luck charm when you wear it.

It also smells like you and when he's laying about it puts a smile on his face.

You have a lot of quiet, intimate moments with Shinsui.

Those mornings where you're up right as the sun rises is the best.

Breakfast is served, the tea is hot, you're both sitting across from each other in the most comfortable silence you could imagine.

Shinsui pauses to just stare at you. You raise your eyebrows in question.

"Nothing. I just realize every time I look at you how much I love you."

#bleach anime headcanons #ichigo kurosaki x reader #ichigo x reader #Byakuya Kuchki x reader #Byakyua x Reader #Shinsui Kyroaku x reader #Shinsui x reader #bleach headcanons #cptspiegel writes #cptspiegel masterlist #no photos are mine

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stellar-imagines · 3 years

Text

SCENARIO REQUEST: ❝that's a little dark.❞

[ Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia ] [ Characters: Class 1-A ]

「 Class 1-A with an emotionless reader who gets hit with a quirk that make them turn back into a child along with the mentality of a child. In the end, Class 1-A and then fluff ensues with them basically fawning over a cute shy and easily flustered reader. But, they discover something about you.」

You couldn't remember what you did yesterday but it felt like you had the greatest sleep in your entire life. As your eyes adjusted to the surprisingly bright light, you slowly got up and looked at your surroundings. The place was unfamiliar and for a second, you found yourself rubbing your eyes and yawning. It seemed that you were in an infirmary of some sort but you don't recall going to school or anything. There were bandages around your arms and neck but it wasn't anything new.

"Oh, you're finally awake, my child." an old lady you didn't recognize swivelled around her office chair and hopped off.

"Who are you and where am I?" you asked, voice coming out a bit weaker than you had expected.

She identified herself as Recovery Girl — the nurse of the school and explained what had happened to you. It seemed like you got hit by a quirk in an unfortunate accident which caused you to turn back into a child with no memory of yourself in the future. You didn't believe it until you saw the different technologies and the date on the calendar. Never in your life you had felt so out of place in your entire life.

While the friendly old lady was trying her best to fill you in, the door to infirmary opened and a brown haired girl stepped in. She had has shoulder length, brown hair that's bobbed and curved inwards at the end. The girl looked at you for a moment, her eyes lit up and you could sense the relief in her eyes. She dropped her belongings and rushed towards the bed you had been sitting on. You backed away on instinct, slightly intimidated by how aggressive she was being.

”Where did you get those injuries from!? I thought you just got hit by a quirk on accident!” she exclaimed, looking at the gauze wrapped around your wrists and neck.

”Calm down. You’re scaring the poor girl.” Recovery Girl stepped in before this brown haired stranger did anything to you.

Recovery Girl explained your situation to the girl who quickly understood the situation. She then approached you but this time, she did it cautiously and ensured that you wouldn’t feel uncomfortable nor intimidated by her. After a quick introduction, you leaned that she was Uraraka Ochaco and supposedly one of your classmates. She got down to your eye level and attempted to befriend you. She tried asking a few questions about yourself. You could answer the simplest questions like ones about yourself. However when it came to questions about the times you spend in UA, you shook your head to everything, none of them sounded familiar to you.

Uraraka spoke in a gentle manner that you were not used to and it didn't take long for you to get comfortable around her. She entertained you by telling stories about her life in UA and heroes. The brunette managed to make you smile a bit with her way of storytelling which included a bit of exaggeration here and there along with the occasional hand gestures.

"Uraraka-san? Are you ready to go back to the dorms?" another unfamiliar voice was heard from the entrance of the infirmary. You saw a few heads peek into the infirmary, those you did not recognize at all.

With the help of Uraraka, your situation was explained to the new people that just arrived. It didn't take long for your classmates to gather around you and pointing out how cute you were. Though it was a bit embarrassing to be put under the spotlight, you quite liked the feeling of having so many people care about you. It made you think about how bright the future seemed for you.

You were brought back to the dorms where you met up with your other classmates. Those who knew about your current situation quickly explained what was going on with you to avoid any misunderstanding and confusion. You stood awkwardly at the entrance, fiddling with the hem of your dress and looking down to avoid eye contact. Suddenly, you were pushed forward by an unknown force, falling on your knees.

“Who left their fucking child here?” a scary looking guy glared down at you as you tried recovering from the small fall you had.

”Hey, Bakugou! Mind your language!” his friend whispered at the ash blonde who just clicked his tongue in response.

Their loud voices startled you which resulted in you to hide behind Uraraka's legs as if it was the safest place in the world. You gripped tightly on her skirt, hiding yourself from the people you didn't recognize. Loud voices always made you nervous and scared, it reminded you of your mother whenever she was unsatisfied with your performance. Uraraka let her hand stroke your hair to soothe your nerves a little. Ashido stood in front of the two of you with her hands on her hips, looking like a mother reprimanding their child.

"Bakugou, you're scaring [First Name]!" the pink haired girl scolded Bakugou who seemed a bit confused.

"You're telling me this brat is [Nickname]?" he closed the distance between the two of you with a few large strides. He stared at your for a few seconds to study your face a bit. It didn't take him that long to actually recognize a few familiar features and eventually he walked off, muttering something under his breath.

"I've never seen her like this before!" Uraraka cooed as you continued to hide behind her legs. You were never the type to be in the center of attention and didn't have any friends in when you were young because of how shy and awkward you were. Ashido crouched down and offered you a small jar of cookies that she had found in the kitchen.

"Should we send her home? She might be more comfortable staying with her parents." Yaoyorozu suggested, watching you munching on the cookie that you've been handed to.

"I think its best we tell her family about it this." Iida took it upon himself to pull out his phone and prepare to dial your home.

”Are we all having a sleepover?” you spoke up after being silent almost the entire time you arrived at the dorms.

"I don't want to go home." Everyone stopped to stare at you for a while, some surprised because it was the first time they've heard you since you came back. The girls looked at each other for a while as if they were silently communicating with one another. Midoriya who seemed to be the first one to notice that you seemed a bit uncomfortable, crouched down in front of you.

"You can stay here with us if you want. I'm sure everyone is okay with that." the viridian haired male gave you a gentle smile that made you feel a bit relaxed.

"Do you like having sleepovers, [First Name]-chan?" Ashido plopped down right next to you.

"I don't have friends and mommy doesn't like having me around." you mumbled.

"That's silly. I'm sure your mother is worried about you." Iida replies.

"Nu uh, mommy strangles me like this every night.” you shook your head lightly and wrapped your hands around your neck to imitate someone strangling you. The room immediately grew silent at your comment, clearly unsure of how to respond to your oddly specific comparison.

"Haha, good joke [First Name]-chan!" Kaminari patted your head gently, his laugh clearly a forced one.

"Mommy used to pull my hair too."

You never the friendly type of person to begin with anyways. From the very first day you got into UA, you were quite anti-social, never initiating any conversations or made effort to befriend anyone. However, it was quite surprising to know that you've been abused when you were younger. Almost everyone seemed shocked by the revelation and had no idea how to react.

"My mom gave me this scar." Todoroki crouched down next to you and gestured to the scar over his eye.

”I can’t believe that the only thing closed off people have in common is the fact that they’ve been abused.” Jirou muttered out loud.

"Okay, don't worry! We're all having a sleepover tonight!" Uraraka beamed brightly which made your eyes light up like a Christmas tree. A small smile made its way to your features and you couldn't help but sway excitedly.

"Everyone is joining right?"

There was no way they could refuse those hopeful eyes of yours, not when you have been through so much at such an age. They all seemed eager, suggesting a movie, snacks and games.One particular ash blonde looked indifferent, hands shoved into his pockets as he began to slowly walk away from the crowd of people. The first person to notice that he was making his way back to his own room was Iida.

"Where are you going Bakugou-kun?" the class president had asked as if it was a natural that Bakugou was also supposed to be a part of this so called 'sleepover'. Bakugou glanced over his shoulder, eyes narrowing at Iida as if he had gone insane.

"What makes you think that I will join this stupid—" the ash blonde gestured at whatever was going on.

"But a sleepover is not one without everyone." your quiet voice interrupted, your small hands tugging at his pants. He held his tongue after seeing Iida wildly gesture at him not to be so mean to you. The entirety of the class seemed to be really hell bent on giving you what you wanted.Bakugou felt his eyebrows twitching and began weighing his options.

Sero, Ashido, Kaminari and Kirishima were openly pleading him to stay while some others seem to believe that Bakugou would never want to sit down for a stupid sleepover. The ash blonde gave in, realizing that no matter what he chose, it won't be any different. If he chose to not participate, he probably won't be able to fall asleep from all the noise. And the possibly of witnessing these extras embarrass themselves didn't sound too bad.

"Fine! You guys are so annoying....." Bakugou grumbled. Your eyes lit up at his change of heart and began tugging him enthusiastically towards the common area’s couch.

Why does he agree to the stupidest things?

Total: 1717 words Published: 05.06.2021

Thank you for requesting! ｡٩(ˊᗜˋ)و*｡ We tried our best for this scenario. Hope we reached your expectations! We hope you liked it! ― author Lou

Thank you for requesting it! Tumblr has changed how the asks look and it looks very different. Hope you enjoyed this! ― author Natsuki

Requests are open! Matchups are closed!

Please do not mind the grammar mistakes and typos.

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ohheyitsokay · 3 years

Text

nicknames

Pairing: Din Djarin (The Mandalorian) x reader

Wordcount: 2.3k

Warnings: none to my knowledge, just a silly thought I strung out

Summary: the things we call each other are an intimate look into how we regard them

“Why do you call him Mandalorian?” Cara was never subtle with you. You had been friends with her for years, and you should’ve known she would notice something after only a few days of your traveling with the three of them.

Shrugging, you looked at her. “I never told you?” You’d completed a lot of tasks together, as a very well balanced pair. And honestly you’d become close quickly, so it surprised you that she didn’t know you inside and out yet.

“I just feel like nicknames are too affectionate. On my home planet they're…” you searched for the word, not wanting to offend her, “intimate? Soft, maybe?”

Cara's dark eyebrows drew together.

“Mando… it sounds like a word some use for ‘dumpling',” you laughed, and her confusion broke - she grinned at you. “Mandu,” you offered, trying to explain. The words were similar under your tongue, thus the core of your problem.

“I cannot walk around professionally and call a warrior I just met dumpling.” And she nodded, laughing along with you.

It was too ridiculous, too cute, and far too intimate. Even without the double meaning, you didn’t want to be overly familiar with the Mandalorian. After all, you would only be traveling with him a few more days, and you’d hardly talked.

The mission went smoothly, however, and you were surprised to find that they offered for you to continue to team up with them. Another set of skills was welcome, and another pair of eyes on the little child was even more so. Your resolve stuck, though. It just didn’t fit, to call him anything other than the title he had given you. And you liked him a bit too much to open that door for yourself.

Din Djarin knew there was something special about you from the very beginning. He wasn’t sure if he liked it, at first, but certainly he had been very aware.

You were interesting, for someone in his field. Not at all the large, muscular fighter that he was used to seeing. But also not a seedy assassin. He’d learned quickly that your skill set came primarily in observation. You had no need to manhandle or shove your way to your bounty, instead choosing to melt into the background and watch until you’d identified the perfect strategy.

It made the first week of the job so much easier, he was content with the idea that you would travel and work with them. But then:

“How did you even know that corridor was there?” Cara was clearly excited by your field work, too. She was hardly paying attention as she walked through his ship into the cockpit.

Shoulders rising slightly, you followed her. “Micro-glitch in the holo-projection shield. I’m sure the Mandalorian's helmet identified it too.” You looked at him.

You looked right at him.

Effortlessly, your eyes found his through the visor. You were smiling a little bit, unaware of his state of shock.

Din had been wearing this helmet long enough to be used to never truly making eye contact with people. Sometimes a person got it right at random, but he could feel the difference – they couldn’t tell. But here you were, your gaze in his casually, like there wasn’t a solid layer between you.

He shrugged, reminding himself to get it together. As you turned back to Cara, he felt like he could breathe again.

Din had heard stories, children’s tales, of catching your soulmate’s eyes across the cantina - or maybe a palace room?, and being drawn together by fate. They were ridiculous, of course, but the very idea that you could bring up the memory was more than jarring.

Still, surely this was a one time thing, and he could forget about it.

For the first few weeks, it seemed like he was right. You rarely directed your gaze in his direction, anyway, being very professional and what he could only assume was shy.

You were more than happy to help with the child sometimes, and you talked freely to Cara, but in his presence you were polite and quiet. All your tasks were completed with efficiency and you would often complete other’s just because of who you were as a person. Normally, this was ideal for him - useless chatter had never been something he was good at. He was more than occupied making sure something was not breaking or mysteriously floating away, or they weren’t in danger. When you offered him silence, he should have been content to do the same, and watch the stars race by.

But… well, Din wasn’t sure he liked that either. Certainly it was strange to feel seen by you, but it felt worse that he could be making you uncomfortable, particularly as his comrade. And the more and more your eyes met his, the more it became exciting, and if maybe he wanted you to be even more than that.

So how could he get more if you hardly ever talked to him? Din shook himself, feeling silly for having zoned out in these thoughts. After all, he didn’t really talk to you, either.

After two months traveling with this strange little group, you were more than settled.

It took no time at all: you had hung up a spare scrap of fabric and made a little room for yourself, and the team functioned like a well oiled machine.

You got up before anyone else, this particular day, and were happy to enjoy the quiet sounds of the Crest as you checked everything needed for the day.

“Good morning, Mandalorian,” you heard the weight of his footsteps through the quiet halls. You didn’t even need to turn around, focused on correcting the flight pattern of the ship.

He had not questioned the use of the full title, had hardly questioned you at all. Outside missions, you two had only had a couple of actual conversations which seemed at first to be just fine. But there was a small nagging in the corner of your mind. His armor and helmet made reading his behavior hard, but you couldn’t quite shake the feeling that something was off between you two. His body language was … almost gentle with you, not the same as he was with the little one, but as if he was afraid you’d startle if he wasn’t.

Unbeknownst to you, he had grown to like the way you said Mandalorian. It rolled off your tongue, as if it really was his name, as if you liked to say it. Din had been increasingly nervous about making you feel uncomfortable, awkward in his efforts to learn about you enough to make you stay. The prospect of sharing pieces of himself with you had become an indulgent fantasy, if only he could figure out how to talk to you.

“Good morning,” you could hear the sleep at the edges of his voice, and the softness you’d learned to recognize.

You hummed for a moment, thinking, before adding, “Good morning too you, too, little one.” You were rewarded with a sleepy little noise, and you smiled as you finished your task before turning towards them both. Thank goodness the child was awake, and you hadn’t caused any problems. His wide eyes were staring at you from above his father's armored forearm, and you smiled. It was these moments you were reminded of mandu – he was being soft.

You looked up to the Mandalorian, half wanting to tell him, but he stiffened: his shoulders rising and back straightening. Biting your lip, you averted your gaze.

“Do I make you uncomfortable?” you turned back towards the stars, letting him think in silence for a moment.

“No,” he said, and you both relaxed. Whatever it was between you was gone for now, and you sat together, listening to the child wake up fully and begin to babble. It occurred to you that maybe he relished these moments, the times in which there were no expectations weighing on his shoulders. You wanted to give him more of those, if possible, to thank him for accepting you into his fold. Besides that, you spent much of your work life manipulating people, and you certainly wanted to establish that you weren’t like that here.

“How did you do that?” his voice, clearer now, interrupted your thoughts.

“Do what?” the Mandalorian rarely initiated conversation with you and it caught you off guard.

“How do you know what… is happening? What is going to happen?” he tone was genuinely curious, and you had to think before you responded. Of course, he knew you mostly just took the time to be more observant, instead of throwing yourself in head first. That’s not what he was asking.

“People are the same wherever you go. The more you watch and the closer you listen, the easier they are to predict,” you said, trying to be both brief and candid. “I was almost no one where I come from. One day, I decided instead of hating that, to use it.”

A small, deep, thoughtful hum came from the helmet beside you.

Silence settled over you for awhile before he quietly begin to talk.

Din told you of his people, his creed, and for the very first time you felt as though you were actually getting to know him. It was nice, not being professional.

“Do you ever want to be seen?” the conclusion of his talking was another surprise for you. Of course, this man who had sworn not to have his face shown would wonder at your apparent comfort with it.

The question felt as if it was seeping into your mind as you pondered it. It occured to you that this conversation had made you ache to be seen by him.

“I think everyone wants that, in their own way,” you said, and as you finally turned towards him, he held your gaze and nodded.

For someone so smart, it was infuriating how you seemed to completely miss the way he was around you.

Din Djarin, a warrior, had finally mustered up the courage to ask you to help him with a bandage on his lower back. The gentle touches and soft brush of your skin against his were foreign, but wonderful.

Unfortunately for him, you had noticed his awkwardness and assumed it was your fault. Ever the problem solver, you’d found a piece of mirror and rigged some wire to hold cleaning pads. It effectively made it easy for him to patch himself up on his own – and ruined the chance for him to steal your touch.

His previous fear had been wrong – you were not soulmates across the room, instead comrades sharing the same space. You were not exactly story royalty, but in spite of that, he was still falling hopelessly for you.

The way you talked to people – who weren’t bounties – with care and kindness. How good you were at your job, and how nice you made their shared space. How you laughed and rolled with the punches that came with this lifestyle. Din had never met anyone quite like you, and beyond all reason, he wanted to know everything about you, share all of himself with you. But you were so clever and polite it made him want to bang his head against a wall.

He couldn’t stop trying though, to get closer to you. Previously, you and Cara had left him and the child occasionally for a personal missions, and it left his feeling strange the entire three days. When you came back his heart had felt light and he wanted desperately to hold onto that feeling.

It wasn’t the same, when Cara went out for the afternoon a day or two after the patch up incident. In fact, he quite enjoyed the jolt of excitement that came with a whole few hours of potential.

Din couldn’t finish his tasks fast enough, even putting the child down for an early nap before nervously setting out to find you.

As expected, you were settled in the common area, reading through articles on your upcoming bounty. He sat next to you, willing himself not to betray his heart with his behavior and scare you away.

He said your name, his blood pumping even before you met his eyes.

“Yes, Mandalorian?” he had no idea why he was so nervous. He’d rehearsed this moment in his mind, it had been aching to be brought to life.

“You… you can call me Din… Djarin.”

It was not exactly as planned.

You’re eyes, ever in his, were wide.

“Din Djarin,” you said it reverently, before saying, “I promise I will keep it safe.”

He held back a small groan. There you went again, being so considerate he was afraid you’d never actually use it.

The frustration overwhelmed him, filling him with boldness and he pressed into your space insistently.

“No,” he said, “Well, do, but use it, please. I cannot stand you calling me Mandalorian like nothing has changed since we first met. I trust you, use it.”

You were adorable, the fear of his confession was damped by how intoxicating it was to be close to you. His hands found you, turning your body in your seat so you were facing him, and settling on the tops of your shoulders. He gently tugged you into him, encouraged that you didn’t pull away, but relaxed into his touch.

“I don’t want to slip,” you said, your voice barely audible.

The forehead of his helmet was so close to yours, you could feel your breath bouncing off of the mask.

“Please,” he said, and it smashed through all the walls you had created.

“Din Djarin,” you said again, tasting it on your tongue. You felt metal above your eyebrows and realized your eyes had closed, savoring the intimacy of the moment. You didn’t open them, allowing your heart to beat at lightspeed, and the tingles radiating from his gloved hands flow through you.

He was being soft with you.

“What if we compromised?” you could hear the smile in your own voice, and he gave a rumbling hum. You wondered if he was as absorbed in this moment as you were, unable to think straight.

“Mandu,” you murmured.

He was silent for awhile, the only indication he heard you being his palms, which slid to where your shoulders curved into your neck.

You could almost hear him thinking.

“I don’t understand,” he finally said, nearly inaudible. Your hands had reached out for him, one wrapping around the armor on his forearm, the other in the soft fabric on the side of his neck. He was distracted, bliss clouding his brain.

“Dumpling,” you said, and if it were anyone else, he would have thrown you across the room. “When you are being my strong and capable leader, you will be Mandalorian,” you continued, unaware that your words and actions were making his whole body fill with warmth and pride. “When you are being yourself, at home with us, I will call you Mandu – it sounds enough like Mando that no one will know it’s because you are truly soft.” He found himself smiling, despite his embarrassment. For you, he was soft. “And I will call you Din when it is just us, and I can be with you as you are now.”

There was no question that these moments would come again. He had made you give in to reading him completely, without any personal doubts.

“Okay, cyar’ika.”

Taglist: @fangirl-316 @scribbledghost

#din djarin x reader #din djarin #din djarin x you #the mandalorian x reader #the mandalorian #maybe i don't know people #THIS is the one i teased about #its a mess but i like it

309 notes · View notes

kodzuvii · 4 years

Text

CLUB STUPID [24: yeah probably]

next [25: premarital hand holding]

PAIRING - SUNA x FEM!READER

GENRE - crack + fluff

warnings - spelling and grammar errors lol guys its 1am plz-

SYNOPSIS - Club Stupid, an anonymous podcast meant for the dumb and dumbest to send in unspoken and nonsensical thoughts about issues they face in their day to day lives and for Y/n to speak out and give her opinions and feelings. Normal feelings though, nothing romantic like how she thinks this lazy guy with questionable hair in the volleyball club is actually pretty cute.

a/n: as an executive member and proud representative of the suna simp club (jk lol idk) it is my duty, to keep my simps fed. you’re welcome. please listen to some cute wholesome shit.

“Look at this Samu, Suna really his own breed, how does he manage to look more dead compared to how he usually looks”

“Well Tsumu, he ignored the same girl twice in the same week and also got confronted by her cousin who’s also his captain. Pretty sad if ya ask me”

The twins snickered to each other as they eyed the quiet middle blocker who stood by his locker. “Did you see his blocks today Tsumu? I was afraid I was gonna break his toothpick arms with my spikes” Osamu whispered but made it loud enough for Suna to hear. Atsumu nodded, “yeah Samu, totally lame if you ask me. Thank God Yn wasn’t watching him” he teased. “Oi,” Aran called out as he packed up his things on his back that was sitting on top of the benches inside of the boy’s change room. “Lay off of him will ya” he scolded but the pair shrugged and continued to change out of their practice clothes.

“What’s even happening?” Akagi whispered and Riseki could only turn to him and mirror the same lost look on his face and give a clueless shrug. They both just sat back and watched the scene unfold in front of them. The twins were teasing and throwing indirect jabs and insults towards their middle blocker who looked as if he was going through an existential crisis with the dull look in his eyes.

Suna was quiet, everyone knew that. Yet somehow in some way, everyone could feel his energy hit an all-time low. He still attended practice sure, but it was like practicing with a pole lamp. He just stood there and observed whatever was happening but even then, his mind was somewhere else. Of course, this didn’t go unnoticed by the coach who gave him an earful about the proper attitude to be having during their practices. Did he listen though? Nah. Listening to a lecture required too much effort. He was just tired and done for the day and the anxious and nervous feeling bubbling up inside of him wasn't helping either.

Suna was stupid. He knew that. His attention span outside of the court was never the biggest and his lack of energy never helped increase his intelligence. He was never the brightest in his class, and honestly, it never bothered him that he wasn’t. Everything he learned came through one ear and left the other. He retained the information for a test but simply forgot everything once it was over. He wasn’t the brightest, and it didn’t bother him not one bit.

What did bother him was his terrible habit of being oblivious towards other people’s feelings. Maybe it was due to his lack of energy or lack of interest, but he simply never put much effort into acknowledging how people felt. Yeah, he got vibes when people had on and off days, his teammates were the twins, you HAD to notice their mood swings and take necessary precautions. It just never occurred to him that more people could enter his bubble. A bubble that revolved around himself.

However, instead of someone finding a way to enter his fragile bubble without popping it, Suna willingly left his bubble when you came into the picture. It was no secret that Suna was whipped the moment his eyes laid on you. He’s been getting clowned about it ever since the twins found out and they never let a day go by without calling him a simp.

He had no clue what type of person you would be when you entered the doors of the Shiratorizawa gym. You looked sweet and bubbly, the smile you came in with never left your face unless you’d whine to your friends or roll your eyes at them. When you stepped into the room, people just naturally gravitated towards your positive energy and your good vibe. He liked that about you. Then again he still didn’t know anything about you at the time. All he knew was that you managed to attract his attention without even directly giving any to him. Every time he tried to look away and focus on whatever was happening in front of him, his eyes trailed back to you.

For a while after camp, you kept popping back in and out of his mind. It was quite ridiculous actually. He’d be taking a drink by the water fountains and he’d look over to the hallway and suddenly the first thoughts would be ‘what if I saw the redhead again?’ It never lasted long, maybe for a split second or two before he snapped himself out of it. He’d never see you again, what was he talking about? He was just being delusional.

So you could imagine the way his mind stopped functioning the night at the train station. Suna had to pinch himself 8 times when he saw you walk out of the train doors. ‘No way’ he thought. You, out of the 7 billion people in the world, was Kita’s cousin. He remembers seeing your tired face and your short stature clad in a big hoodie and loose sweatpants with your hair tied up. You were supposed to look like a mess, why did he keep thinking that you looked so pretty? This must’ve been the higher power playing a trick on him for slacking off during practice. So annoying.

Suna could keep his cool around school. You weren’t in the same classes meaning he didn’t see you at all. So you could imagine the kind of panic that crossed his mind when Kita told the team that he’d have his cousin staying in the gym. He learned later on that you started watching practices because Kita didn’t feel comfortable with you walking home. You were nice to the team, incredibly nice actually. Your easy-going nature made it easy for you to have a couple of conversations with his teammates here and there. While you were nice to Aran and Akagi, you had a little feisty attitude with the twins (mainly Atsumu) and he couldn’t help but admire how outspoken you were. You were blunt, to say the least. That was something you and Kita had in common. But he liked that about you, how you were always free to speak whatever was on your mind and keep a conversation going.

Suna noticed early on that you rarely paid attention to their practice. He figured volleyball just wasn’t your thing and he couldn’t blame you for that. During water breaks, he’d glance up and watch you tuck back your hair and sometimes he’d catch you scratching your temple in annoyance because of some question you couldn’t answer on your homework. You never looked up, simply unphased by whatever was happening in front of you.

Even so, he still put the smallest amount of extra effort into his practices. Jumping a bit higher and running a bit faster and spiking the ball with more force. He insisted that it was about time he would break some of his bad habits, but even the team knew that it was a sorry excuse. Truth be told, a little part of him was just hoping that if you ever looked up from your phone or your work in your lap, you’d see him and think that he looked at least a little bit cool.

One day, on the rare occasion that he’d be listening in class, he remembers his teacher having a discussion with the class about an epiphany.

The feeling of a sudden or striking realization that hits an individual out of nowhere.

It was late at night where Suna hit an epiphany. You were off to Miyagi, spending your weekend with your best friend and the Twins continued to bug him about his little first-year crush even though he had asked them multiple times to drop the topic.

Suna came to the conclusion that he liked the way you made him feel. He liked the way he felt at ease when you were around him. He liked how you were so different compared to him, but it never stopped you from forming a friendship with him. You never pushed him to ever open up to you, you listened to the bare minimum he had to say and never took his lazy nature and blunt attitude to heart. He liked annoying you, the way your face would scrunch up when he’d take your bento’s the first couple times during your first initial lunch hangouts or the way you’d puff your cheeks when he comments on your height. He liked the way your eyes lit up when the smallest things caught your attention. He took notes on the songs you said you were currently listening too or the ones that reminded you about happy memories.

Suna especially liked seeing you smile. Especially towards him. Something about it gave him the same feeling that was comparable to the way he would feel when he would see those jelly sticks on sale at the grocery store. The way you’d roll your eyes in playful annoyance when he'd come up to you and ask to bandage his fingers even though you both knew that he was capable of doing it himself. You would tease him, a playful smile gracing upon your lips, telling him that his fingers would probably break off if you weren’t there to bandage them up. Suna liked thinking that having you wrap them up made his hands feel a bit stronger with his blocks. But you didn’t need to know that.

He remembers a specific memory that lives rent-free in his mind. He was walking down the hallway, casually strolling and taking his time to get back to class after using the bathroom and he happened to notice you heaving a tired sigh as you closed the doors to your class. You looked quite frustrated, probably because it was your art class and you had been complaining days earlier about how creatively drained you were.

Suna must’ve been looking at you for a moment too long because the moment your eyes met, he felt something tug at his chest by the way your eyes sparkled at the sight of him. Despite being under a little bit of stress, the same smile he grew to enjoy seeing made its way onto your lips and you waved to him excitedly before running up and rambling off about how much your class was pissing you off.

You two eventually got in trouble for skipping the whole period after being too caught up in your conversation. Suna thought it was worth it though.

After scrolling through his phone, listening to Atsumu’s obnoxious lovey-dovey playlist, and inevitably searching “how to know if you like or like like a girl” (there's a difference, he swears) on google.

He came to his epiphany.

Maybe before, when he barely knew you and you never knew him, maybe he was just infatuated with the idea of you.

But it was different now, He liked you.

And that scared him.

It scared him how vulnerable he felt. Suna’s reserved and quiet nature gave him a hard time to open to others. Not that he really cared if he was being honest. He simply had the mindset that no one needed to know everything there was to his existence. Everyone eventually leaves anyways, what was the point?

When it sank into him that he liked you, it confused him endlessly. You never wanted to get out of his head and sooner or later he found himself doing the smallest things for you. The little black silk band was always on his wrist and if it wasn’t on his wrist, it would be tucked away in his pockets. Not to mention that he kept one in his pencil case for good measure. The bandaids inside in his backpack were sealed away in a ziplock bag just in case you ever got hurt because he knew you were a bit clumsy. He found himself keeping his eyes open for little souvenirs and trinkets that looked like something that you’d like wherever he went.

At first, he thought that he just wanted to upgrade you from friend to best friend. Maybe this was a friendship that he had just been deprived of since his world revolved around constantly meaning to improve in volleyball. Yes, he did find comfort in the friendship he grew with you, but sooner or later he realized that he wanted more. The thoughts of holding your hand slipped into his mind and sooner or later hugging you from behind and resting his head on top yours flowed in followed by taking you back by peppering your smooth and soft cheeks with kisses. That wasn’t something that best friends did.

Kita was right about how his logic of ignoring you to suppress his feelings was stupid and that the worst things that could happen were that he’d get rejected. But he didn’t want to face the chance of him getting rejected, he’d like you for so long and he learned during his time spent away from you that he didn’t want to just stop talking to you. Suna knew himself, if he got rejected then he’d distance himself away from you and never talk to you ever again because the embarrassment would eat him up.

He didn’t wanna lose you for that. He wasn’t ready.

What a coward.

He just really hoped you liked the flowers and read his note, he thought anything was better than a stupid “I’m sorry” text.

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“Hurry up, I need to lock up the gym” Kita’s voice echoed throughout the walls as he stepped into the changeroom. Suna looked up from his phone, taking one last glance at your ‘see you soon :P’ text before shutting it off and shoving it into his pockets. As everyone began to leave one-by-one and bid their goodbyes to each other and their captain. The twins however didn’t leave until they both gave Suna a teasing punch on both of his shoulders. Suna only glared at them before proceeding to make his exit as well.

Kita stopped Suna before he could exit and the look on his face seemed rather serious. With his voice low, Kita simply said “She needs to be back by 7. If she comes home hurt in any way, I’m benching you” he said sternly and that was enough for him to feel his skin crawl under his tracksuit jacket. Suna nodded, understanding that he really wasn’t kidding and that he definitely bench him.

Kita turned around and opened the door for them both to leave the changerooms. They walked together side-by-side and from a distance, he could see your short figure walking up to both of them. You looked different today, your hair was sitting on your shoulders and a pair of gold-rimmed glasses he was yet to see was sitting on the bridge of your nose. You were clad in your uniform with an oversized pink knit cardigan overtop. Was that a new cardigan you were wearing? He’s never seen it before either.

Kita smiled at the sight of you skipping up to them and he watched you two exchange high fives and he gave you a brief little speech about staying late. You nodded along and Suna stood by and watched Kita ruffle your hair making you whine cutely.

He wanted to do that.

You waved goodbye to your cousin and Kita looked at Suna and gave him a firm nod before turning back and making his way towards the gym doors. You turned back and faced Suna, your hands behind your back as you made your way towards him with a warm smile. “Hey there” you greeted and stood in front of him, looking up so you could look at him clearly. Suna couldn’t help but look at you weirdly, why were you acting as nothing happened? Shouldn’t you be upset with him? “Hi, let’s go?” god, why was he so forward.

You hummed and shook your head, making him furrow his eyebrows in confusion, “do you not wanna go anymore? I can drop you off if you want-” You rolled your eyes, “I don’t see you for a week and you’re already trying to get rid of me?” you questioned and narrowed your eyes at him. Suna felt his heart wrench as your lips pouted.

He shook his head, “n-no” he stuttered. Your eyes perked up and you watch his cheeks heat up (potentially from embarrassment, but you're not going to assume) and look away.

You chuckled and grabbed his wrist and pulled him to follow behind you. What made you so bold today? Probably from the unexpected pep talk you had with Goshiki that morning.

“You don’t need him Ln-senpai! If he thinks he can just look over you and all your greatness and beauty and not acknowledge how beautiful you are and how your very presence graces this dull world then send his ass to KFC! You are a woman senpai! A beautiful woman who deserves everything. Not a value menu that has a 20% off discount!”

Did his speech make sense? Sure. You’ll take it over Tendou’s “cut his dick off if he does you dirty queen” text message sent with the confetti effect on imessage followed by a bunch of knife emojis that was honestly more threatening rather than comforting.

You pulled him out of the gym and Shin gave you a look before shaking it off and locking up the gym doors. From the corner of your eyes, you could see the twins sending winks your way before snickering and walking off. You rolled your eyes and stopped when you reached the doors of the school.

You turned around and faced Suna who looked very lost and confused. “Let’s not go to the convenience store today, let’s go somewhere else,” you say. Suna nodded slowly, “okay? Where do you wanna go?” he asked.

Just then, you lifted up your other hand and it was only then that Suna noticed you carrying a small pink lunch tote. You let go of his wrist and tucked some strands your hair behind you ear, “we haven’t had lunch together in a week and you had a meeting today again so we couldn’t do anything today either and well..” you trailed off and looked up at him and shrugged, “I figured we could make up for lost time” you muttered.

Suna felt his chest tighten, not only because you were absolutely adorable and it was making him lose his mind, but it almost seemed like you were the one trying to apologize to him when you didn’t do anything wrong. He did.

You frowned as you looked at how subtly his face dropped. As upset as you were, you understood that he wasn’t ready to tell you whatever he was meaning to hide. He wasn’t obligated to tell you anything and you understand that. A small smile creeping up on your lips, “let’s go eat at the park near my house. The one we walk by all the time. Saves you the trouble of worrying if you’re gonna get home on time or not” you laughed slightly.

Suna couldn’t say no to you, so here were the two of you now. Eating and sitting in front of the other with the bento’s you had prepared on the table. The park was as busy as it usually would be during the afternoon. The atmosphere felt warm as the sky was slowly settling into hues of orange with peaks of pink seeping through. Suna watched you happily eat the bento you had prepared and listened attentively as you told him about everything he missed during your week and you did the same when he talked about his.

A part of him couldn’t help but admire how pretty you looked in front of him. Suna was lying when he told the twins that you were a 7. You were beyond a 7 and beyond whatever scale they had given him. It was a rare sight to see you with your glasses and partnered with that oversized pink cardigan? You were adorable.

You tilted looked up from your food and stopped mid-sentence when you saw him just look at you with what seemed to be a fond look in his eyes. But you could’ve just been mistaken, maybe you need to have your prescription checked again. “Rin, what’s wrong?” you asked. At the sound of his name, Suna blinked snapped back into reality and was met with your concerned look. “W-what?” You chuckled, “you zoned out Rin, everything okay?” you asked.

Rin.

He liked the way his name rolled off your lips.

He shook his head, “I’m fine, sorry. This is really good by the way, I didn’t think you could cook” he said as an attempt to change the subject. You rolled your eyes but you looked away. “As much as I want you to believe I’m some great chef, Granny helped me with most of it” you confessed sheepishly.

He chuckled and poked the sausage that was cut up into a little octopus with his chopsticks, “Well, you did tell me that you burned rice once so maybe I thought too highly of you to make a full meal” he teased. You scoffed and grabbed his bento, “if you’re not gonna appreciate the chef then you don’t deserve the food” you huffed. Suna rolled his eyes and grabbed yours, “guess I’ll have to eat yours then” he said and shoved some rice into his mouth. Your jaw dropped at his actions, “Hey!”

As the day went on, you both began to feel at ease and comfortable once again with each other's presence. The harmony that flowed around between you two was coming back and was settling into its familiar rhythm. You two continued to chat as if nothing happened. Laughing at anything and everything you found remotely hilarious under the sun. Suna felt warm. He was here, with you, and everything felt okay. With both your bento’s empty and tucked neatly away into your lunch bag and the sun settling down and giving a wake-up call for the stars to come out, it was about time for Suna to bring you home.

The walk back to your place was comfortable. There was no tension in the air or any awkwardness in the atmosphere. It was simply peaceful. You were walking beside him and rambling on about something that had happened to you in class that day. It was slightly cooler and the winds were colder and he had noticed early on that you kept pulling at the ends of your cardigan at an attempt to get some more warmth from it. It would’ve just been rude for him to let you be cold, Kita would kill him if you got sick.

It took you by surprise to see Suna slipping off his volleyball jacket and shoving it into your hands. He was wearing a hoodie under it anyway, he didn’t mind. A part of him was just curious about how his jacket would fit you too and what kind of fool would you be to reject an oversized jacket? It was just extra points that happened to be from the boy that you liked.

Suna nodded along to what you were saying, but he couldn’t help the sudden urge to just grab your hand out of his system. You were walking so close to each other. Your shoulders kept brushing past and your hands were right there.

But with the events that happened this past weekend, he didn’t wanna overstep any boundaries. He was still too cautious that he would mess up and make you upset all over again. With the thought of his actions, Suna suddenly felt a little ball of guilt eat him up. He never stopped feeling bad about what he did. Kita’s words rang through his head, he needed to learn how to communicate better and not deal with everything all on his own. Maybe he really was a coward for letting such a dumb fear eat him up.

In the midst of your talk about how much you despise your math class, you turned to look at Suna and saw how troubled he looked. He didn’t even look like he was listening anymore and seemed to be having some sort of internal battle with himself.

You furrowed your eyebrows and grabbed his wrist to stop walking. “Rin, what’s wrong?” you asked, concern lacing the tone of your voice. You both never really brought up what had happened. Maybe you were just too caught up in having a good time but you were honestly content with the reasons he gave you. If he wasn’t ready then he wasn’t ready.

Suna however felt like he owed you so much more than his apology that he already struggled to explain.

Suna stared down at you for a moment, the unreadable expression on his face that only made you more confused. It was quiet for a moment, the only sound to be heard was the wind blowing by and the trees rustling.

Nothing would have prepared you for the way he turned around and pulled the arm that was holding his wrist and pulling you into his chest. His hands wrapped around your shoulders as he held you just a little bit tighter. He was a bit stiff, but you couldn’t put that against. He wasn’t the type of person to initiate things like this.

“I’m sorry”

Your body froze, something about his tone was different. It was vulnerable.

You stayed quiet, letting yourself relax slowly in his hold.

“F-fuck, I’m really sorry. I said I wasn’t good with words right? S-so I’m trying to explain now because you deserve it but I don’t even know why I did it. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I didn’t mean to make you upset at all, I was just caught up with myself and I didn’t consider what I was doing to you. You didn’t deserve that. I like being around you and I’m sorry” He pulled away and one of his hands dropped to your waist and fiddled with the material of his jacket. You watched as his free hand dug deep into his pockets and you watched him pull something out.

“It’s kind of pathetic if you ask me and it’s also kind of ugly but-” he grabbed one of your arms and dropped the object into the palms of your hands. Your eyes widened at the little paper craft,

It was an origami strawberry.

It was small, it fit perfectly inside on the palms of your hand. You could see that he struggled with making it. The leaves were slightly bent and the tip of the strawberry was ripping off. There were lots of creases all in the wrong places and even the seeds were drawn on.

But it still melted your heart.

“I read somewhere about 1000 paper cranes for a wish and well, cranes are kind of hard and I didn’t have enough paper to make 1000 and-god this is so embarrassing-” he muttered the last part but gained enough courage to look up at you and meet your eyes. Your eyes were soft and patient. “I wished that you wouldn’t hate me. Or that, this wouldn’t y’know...make everything all weird between us. I like you-or well uh- being around you at least and I-I know you joke about it all the time but please don't-”

Suna paused when he felt you wrap your arms around his waist once again, hugging him back but just a little bit tighter. The small confession not even going through your mind because your attention was too focused on the way his words were making you melt.

“You’re an idiot” you mumbled into his chest and hugged him a bit tighter. Your words made his stomach drop, but that feeling went away when you pulled back and looked at him with a smile. A smile that said you understood.

“I’m never gonna force you to tell me anything you don’t want to tell me” You repeated but this time it felt different, it felt warmer.

“I’m never gonna hate you. I know how you are Rin, you’re not good with your words and I get that. You could've sent me a text but you didn’t. You went out of your way with the flowers and even the little note and this adorable fucking strawberry is more than enough” you laughed but you could feel your eyes watering up slightly with the overwhelming amount of emotions you were feeling all at once. “You don’t need to keep apologizing to me okay? I understand. Thank you,” you smiled. Suna stared down at you. Nodding slowly and you chuckled and fell into his arms once again.

This time, he was the one who held you a bit tighter.

“This side of you is cute you know, but It’s kinda ruining your whole tsundere image you’re going for. Bet the twins would make fun of you for being this thoughtful” you whispered jokingly, making him roll his eyes and huff a quiet “shut up” in annoyance. If only you knew the pain he endured for putting up with those twins.

You both stayed like that for a little while longer. Holding each other and fitting so perfectly in the arms of the other. If it wasn’t for your phone dinging from a text from Shin asking where you were, Suna swore he would have held you there for the whole night.

You pulled away first and tugged his hand, “come on, Shin wants me home now so let’s get going ‘kay? Don’t want you getting benched the whole season now do we?” you grinned and walked in front of him and tugged him along.

Somehow in some way, your fingers slipped perfectly into his.

Suna could only feel the warmth rising in his chest, his daze fixed at the sight of his hands interlocked with yours.

“Oh and Rin” you called out, making him snap back into reality.

Suna hummed, looking right back at you.

“Tell me when you’re ready, okay?”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

“Text me when you get up in your room safe”

You turned around to him with a quizzical expression before letting out a chuckle, “I’m in front of my house Rin, I got here in one piece” you said and motioned your free hand towards yourself to prove that you were indeed, uninjured. Suna rolled his eyes and bit the inside of his cheek, “you’re clumsy remember, you might fall or something” he muttered and looked away.

You grinned and squeezed his hand, “Awe, look at you caring for me and my wellbeing. My ears might be deceiving me but it sounds like you’re in love with me” you teased and swung your hands together back and forth.

Suna huffed, his mind not properly functioning when the words fell out of his mouth.

“yeah probably”

Simultaneously, his eyes and yours widened and you both froze.

Both you and Suna blinked at each other twice. Your eyes looked down at your hands that were still interlocked and looked up at his face that was fully drained of any colour. Your heart was beating rapidly against your chest and Suna began to question the very point of his existence.

“W-what?”

“Uh-”

“Y-you said-”

“A-ah I-”

“Oi!” you both jumped and instinctively Suna pulled you closer to him. You looked at up him briefly before turning around to see Granny waiting by the gate with an impatient but also teasing glint in her eyes. “It’s almost 7:30 Yn-chan! You almost missed bingo night! Kiss ya little friend goodnight and come in before Shin and I eat all the mochi we left for ya” she called out but you could hear the teasing tone in her voice.

“C-coming!” you yelled back. Your face was piping hot and you wanted the ground to swallow you whole from the amount of embarrassment and flusteration you were feeling at that moment.

Granny nodded and walked back inside, and looked up at Shin who was standing with his arms crossed on the porch. Granny walked back to him with a victorious smile on her lips as she gave him a thumbs up. Granny knew what she was doing and she knew what she saw. She’s gonna call and gossip to your mother.

You gulped and took a step back and looked back at Suna. He was still frozen and his mind was racing at what just happened and he too, wanted the ground to swallow him whole. “I-I uh, I guess I gotta go?” you winced, but the tone of your voice made it sound like you were asking a question. Suna nodded, “y-yeah, goodnight I guess” he muttered as he looked away and you watched his face heat up.

You were both so embarrassed but neither one wanted to let go of the others hand.

Suna figured he couldn’t keep you out all night and just as he was about to let go of your hand, a sudden wave of confidence went through your veins and you just went ‘fuck it.’

You pulled his arm down towards you taking him back. His eyes widened, “what are you-” you stood slightly on your tippy-toes and kissed his cheek which made him shut up instantly. “That’s for today, thanks. goodbye.” you said frantically.

Suna froze, too much in shock and his mind was still in the middle of trying to register what just happened and watched as you let go of his hand and covered your face furiously blushing and running off to your gate and slamming it shut.

He stared blankly at the gate door and blinked twice as an attempt to get himself back to reality. He brought his hands up to his cheeks that were on fire. His mind kept replaying the way your soft lips kissed his cheek and could feel the slightest residue of your lip gloss still on his cheek.

Shit, you really had him wrapped around your finger.

“Idiot”

✧･ﾟ: *✧･ﾟ:*

a/n: BYE STOP IM SO SINGLE THIS IS SAD AND I AM DEVASTATED.

taglist! [CLOSED] @chocolaterumble @elianetsantana @versatilewindow @introvertatitsfinest @aristatrois @mizukisonoda @amberisnotcrazy @kritiiiii @iloveyouasmuchaspoohloveshoney @a-moon-fairy @akaasht @lotusweebs @marvelous-maxi @laughingismorefun @hhmnvm @sweetyrina @honeydrip @miracleboy420 @rachelexe @charsdummb @sxrcasticbacon @loser-keiji @dinablossom @ntimacy @kac-chowsballs@unhappyraspberry @sbaepsae @doebopeepeebbod @missalienqueen @ssuna @violenthead @unstableye @tycrackculture @a-applepi @lollyzen @aisawa-reo @ashybitch89 @sunflowerirl @sapphicstarss @melodiamore @valrubiii @urbasicaveragegirl @mint-mai @4kaashl @sugawsites @anngelllla @applekenm @bumblebeesofspace @dreamstormings @milkingkageyama @tsumu-core @luvelyxp @aquariarose

#haikyuu #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu social media au #haikyuu smau #suna #suna rintarou #suna x reader #suna rintarou x reader #suna smau #suna rintarou smau #inarizaki #club stupid

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sweetleaf-cafe · 3 years

Text

"Hello hello! I would like to request Louis Amamiya and Default!Male Protagonist (seperate) Mocha biscuits please! <Relationship headcanons please with a human s/o who dearly loves them and had even asked them to drink their blood from their neck at one point if they need it? Many thanks~"

Hi-hi~! Sorry, we don't write for Default!Male Protagonist, as we lack the information to really feel comfortable writing for him. As for writing for Louis, thank you so much for requesting for our best boi!!! He deserves all the love and headpats in the world.

Your mocha and biscuits for Louis Amamiya from Code Vein are served!

Louis Relationship Headcanons

First off, he's going to feel like he doesn't deserve someone as wonderful as you in his life.

But you won't let him get away with saying that and always remind him of all the reasons why you don't care about the notion of whether he "deserves" you or not and love him anyway.

Each time you do, he'll get a tiny bit flustered and shy, and he'll get a warm feeling in his heart.

But at the same time, a pang of worry and guilt will continue to rest in his mind.

Given time, however, he can feel those feelings fade, just a bit.

Louis won't see you as below him, despite you being a human.

Still, he will worry for you, as humans don't have the physical capabilities that a revenant holds.

You'll be able to notice it in his hesitance to bring you along on missions, and when you do, he'll keep a closer eye on you.

If you do prove to be a great fighter or thinker anyway, he'll be a little less cautious.

Still, it won't be able to leave Louis' mind that if something happens and you get severely injured or die, you won't be able to come back.

And if you aren't a fighter, he'll be extremely hesitant to bring you into any potentially dangerous situation.

Louis will also not want to act too overprotective or make you feel like he's controlling you.

So unless you try or want to do something that could end up being really dangerous, he'll only strongly advise caution.

He's afraid of losing you, he's afraid of losing his memories of you.

But each time, you always remind him that you'll stay with him as long as you can and that if he does forget, you'll still be there for him.

When you're back at the base, he'll often be working on something, but will always try to take some time to spend with you.

Sometimes, these moments are just talking about whatever comes to mind.

These conversations can be anything from small bits of chatter to excited rambling over a book.

And the way his eyes light up when he starts talking about a favorite book is literally the most precious thing in the universe and must be protected.

Normally, he's quite calm and speaks in that manner.

But when he's excited over something you can hear it in his voice, he'll speak just a tiny bit faster, Louis will have this adorable smile.

AHHH I THINK I JUST TURNED MYSELF INTO A SIMP.

But oftentimes, they'll be rather quiet.

He'll hold or close, sometimes just thinking or even reading a beloved book.

Either way, Louis will cherish any time he gets to spend with you.

When he's around you, everyone nearby can sense the companionship between you both.

He'll always be just a bit softer and gentler with you.

Of course, everyone is going to bring it up, just to tease him. And boy does he get flustered easily...

At first, when Yakumo mentions how he looks happy when you're around, he'll try to brush it off.

But Yakumo can and will leave him a blushing mess.

And if you're nearby and are easy to tease, he'll leave you both incredibly embarrassed.

It really doesn't matter if you're in a relationship or not, Louis will get flustered if people bring up both your... romantic intentions.

Still, he's just adorable when he's flustered, so you don't particularly mind.

If you ever ask him to drink your blood, he'll refuse.

Louis doesn't want to hurt you, moreover, the taste itself is different, addictive.

He doesn't want to risk it if he doesn't have to.

Either way, he really does appreciate the sentiment, and will always let you know how much he does.

If there is a time where he risks joining the lost without your blood or if you tell him you would really like him to, he'll hesitantly drink from you.

But only if you are completely okay with it.

He'll pull you in close to him, more carefully than usual.

The moment that he senses any nervousness, pain, or anything like that, he'll pull away.

He'll be rambling out apologies as he puts an awkward distance between the two of you.

If you don't calm him down, he'll speed walk off as fast as he can without outright running and will probably avoid you for the next few hours.

And of course, Yakumo is going to be groaning in the background.

If you happen to be in a dangerous location, he'll stay close to you, but you can practically hear the gears turning frantically in his head.

If it goes off without a hitch, he'll pay close attention to not drain too much blood from you.

The entire time, you'll be able to feel how tense he is against you, as he's afraid of losing control.

A.K.A. he's afraid of losing you or scaring you away.

Once he's finished, as long as you're in a safe environment, he'll likely want to stay in the same position.

He'll be rather quiet, mulling over what just happened.

Once he's snapped out of it, he'll go to find bandages as well as supplies to make sure it doesn't get infected.

He'll ask to take care of the wound himself, as he was the one who inflicted it.

As Louis does so, he'll thank you for doing that for him.

The first time, afterward, he'll be a little more cautious around you and will be mentally checking in on your wellbeing, making sure there were no aftereffects.

And he won't ever ask you to do so again, but secretly, he really enjoyed the feeling of being so close and doing something so intimate with you.

When it comes to affection, you can really see it in the way he looks out for you.

If he sees something that reminds him of you or knows you'd be interested in, he'd be sure to tell you about it or give it to you.

Each time, you'd find him searching your reactions, looking to see what sorts of things interested you more than others.

Half the time, he wouldn't really do this consciously, even after you start dating.

But either way, he'd be doing it anyway.

And another thing he'll do after you're in a relationship is to generally be touching you in some way.

It makes him feel close to you and reminds him that you're there.

Often, he'll sit closer to you, or even let you use him as a pillow.

Did I mention he's the absolute best pillow one could ask for?

He might be reading something aloud to you, talking, or just thinking and you end up falling asleep on him.

It'll take him a moment to notice, as he's probably wrapped up in what he's doing.

But when he does, his heart is going to melt.

How?!?! How are you so adorable?!?!?

The entire time, he'll be careful not to move, and would definitely sneak a few glances at your sleeping face.

He literally can't help himself.

Louis will also gently stroke your hair.

No matter what it's like, he loves it, and it really calming for him. If he needs to wake you up, it'll be gentle.

He'll probably lightly shake your shoulder and softly call your name a few times.

If you're a deep sleeper, then he'll progressively get more forceful until you're awake.

And if he falls asleep on you, it's probably because he's managed to overwork himself again, and needs the sleep.

As much as he mothers over everyone else, he'll often find himself neglecting his own needs.

So he'll need you to remind him to actually take care of himself.

If you do, then he'll be eternally grateful.

Still, if he does fall asleep on you, he'll actually be pretty quiet.

He might snore ever so slightly and it's actually pretty cute when he does.

Louis also likely gets nightmares.

When he's in a nightmare, he'll thrash around or cry out names in his sleep.

And at worst, he'll cry.

At this point, it is best to wake him up.

Once he's awake, he would thank you and would likely delve back into dark thoughts.

He'll probably either want some space or would be extra clingy.

It really depends on the dream, so it can go either way.

Overall, he's best boi and best bf, 20/10 would recommend.

Literally, who gave him the right to be so precious?!

#louis #louis amamiya #code vein louis #code vein #code vein x reader #louis x reader #louis amamiya x reader #x reader #headcanons #code vein headcanons #louis headcanons #louis amamiya headcanons

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startanewdream · 3 years

Note

*Harry looked at his mother."Stay close to me," he said quietly.* Could you write something about Harry having this moment with Lily, but in your world where Jily lives? Perhaps after Dumbledore's death, or at the end of the War, after Voldemort died. I don't know, I feel that Harry would be very attached to his mother in these important moments, and maybe if you want, your world where Jily lives is just perfect <3

Hey! Thank you so much for this prompt @sweeethinny! I love writing Lily and Harry’s moments together and this one is so special in the books!

Now, in the world I imagine, there are actually few moments that Harry needs his mother and she isn’t there. Then I thought about Voldemort’s ressurrection and the duel after, because this version of Priori Incantatem would have no James or Lily appearing. So Harry is alone... and he really needs his mother afterwards.

And then I finally wrote a version of the Third Task through Lily’s eyes, which is pure angst, really, but full of Lily’s mother love.

It’s on AO3 or below:

Their hug is so fleeting that Lily wonders if that moment will haunt her later.

She admonishes herself for ever thinking about that. Nothing will happen; it’s the Third Task and soon, whether Harry wins or not, this damn tournament will be over.

So for now, she hugs Harry but lets him go quickly, knowing he feels embarrassed of being hugged in public, and watches as James slids his hand fondly through Harry’s hair to mess it as much as he can. Harry smiles at them, nervous and a little excited too, and then he leaves them with the other champions.

James squeezes her hand as they sit again at the table, though neither is hungry anymore. In front of them, Hermione gives her a comforting smile, while Ron shakes his head.

‘Wanna bet he will end up winning this thing after all?’, he asks, turning to his brothers. Lily watches as they start betting on how long it will take for Harry to get out of the maze with the Cup in his hand, coins passing through their hands.

Her heart fills with a warm glee. They are betting on Harry. Never against him.

They walk to the Quidditch Field, James and Ron complaining about the mess they’ve made in the field and discussing how it will be the next season, how much Harry will need to train in the Summer for making up for the year he lost without any match.

‘He caught an egg dragon’, Ginny notes brightly, right next to Hermione. ‘What is a Golden Snitch after that?’

They laugh and Lily lets that sound warm her too; she has been shivering ever since they left the castle, though the summer night is warm. There is just something in the air tonight that makes her feel ill. A calm before the storm, with just the wind announcing the change that will come.

It’s probably just the nervousness. She couldn’t show to Harry, during their free day at Hogwarts, how apprehensive she was, but now her nerves are probably catching on with her. These tasks seemed so dangerous after all, and Harry is still so young…

The air around her is calmer than in the other tasks, however. People are talking excitedly, everyone wondering who will be the champion; now and then, even amongst students of other schools, she hears Harry’s name. He was the underdog, but now he is a favourite - not because of being the Boy-Who-Lived, but because of his achievements so far. First with that dragon, with the way Harry had flown nearly perfect, acting smart and dancing around it, much better than his parents’ original suggestion of attacking it in the eye; and then, during that boring Second Task, when it was announced that Harry had taken longer only because he was worried about all other hostages, not just his.

Lily had been worried with his delay, but she had no heart to chide him later. He was never in danger after all, and Harry was just being his usual selfless; he always had a tendency to defend others. Lily could not complain about her son being a fair player.

‘He will be okay’, James whispers to her as they take their places at the stands, and Lily forces herself to smile.

The sound of the whistle, marking the beginning of the Third Task, makes her jump, but with all the noise and confusion around her, no one seems to notice it. That’s better. She doesn’t need to infect her worries with others.

There doesn’t seem to be anything for her to worry, though. The first hour passes quickly. They can’t see anything inside the maze, but Bagman provides a few commentaries about what the champions have just faced - a boggart, an acromantula, a hole in the ground, blast-ended skrewts (though Lily is not sure she knows that), a disorientation fog, riddles, giant snakes.

And then it’s announced that the Beauxbatons champion is out. Lily remembers seeing that beautiful girl and wonders what happened to her, feels sorry she had to leave.

Ten minutes later, when Bagman announces the Durmstrang champion has left too, the crowd explodes in glee and noises around her. Now it’s only Harry and the Diggory boy on the run, which means a Hogwarts’ win in any case.

And now, for the first time, so close to the end, Lily really wonders how it would be if Harry really wins the tournament, instead of just surviving it. She can see the way he would beam, surprised and proud, how he would raise the cup and people would cheer around him; how Harry would be really happy because he won on his merits, and not because of something he did when he was one-year-old. That would be Harry’s victory, only his.

James will make sure to keep the cup in the middle of their living room; he will tell everyone how his son just won the Triwizard Tournament (‘and all the other champions were already of age, but Harry did not let that scare him, he fought bravely and won all the tasks! My son! Triwizard Champion!’).

And Lily can’t help but think that it’s her son, the son of a muggleborn witch, who will win the most traditional tournament, and what this means to her and other people like her. Oh, she will not mind gloating about this for once.

But the minutes go on, and there are no more announcements, Bagman’s voice silent and the excitement from the crowd is turning into whispers, questions, worries.

There is something wrong, Lily thinks, and she doesn’t need to say out loud because now not even James is frowning, quiet.

There is a commotion in the field, a bright colourful light that lasts for a second (‘Was that a portkey?’, James asks, confused), then she watches Dumbledore and the Minister rushing forward, but she can’t really see anything else. Then the whispers begin, those same words repeated in a crescendo as more people know about it and pass it on, a deadly song.

‘He is dead. Dead!’

She holds James’ hand as not to fall now. Everything is dark around her, and Lily is in a nightmare she can’t wake up, thinking of that last fleeting hug she gave on Harry; she should have hugged him more, refusing to let him leave the safety of her arms for the unknown. Why did she let him go? She feels the fire of the dragon burning her skin alive, the coldness of the deep of the lake and the still air of the maze that Harry entered to never come out -

‘Cedric Diggory! Dead!’

And it’s the first breath of air as she leaves that horrible nightmare, a relief beyond words, a lightness that comes to her as Lily understands it is not Harry that died…

Then it is guilt, a horrible feeling of being the worst person on the planet, because how can she be happy that someone else is dead? How can she actually smile when another parent will mourn their child today?

But there is no easy answer, no trying to understand what happened, just a primal urge to get to Harry and to make sure her son is safe.

She will worry about everything else later.

________________

‘Now I have work for each of you. Fudge's attitude, though not unexpected, changes everything’. Dumbledore is saying, looking at them all, and Lily knows what he will ask even before he says it.

She glances at Harry instead.

His face is pale, his eyes more troubled than a fourteen-year-old should have the right to be, and yet she can see he is watching everything with attention. He is trying to understand what is happening right now, as if witnessing Voldemort’s return and the crazy lunatics of that fake Mad-Eye Moody was not enough.

He needs to sleep - a dreamless sleep so he can begin to recover, as hard as that it will be.

Dumbledore turns first to Snape, asking him to do something if he is ready, and from the corner of her eyes Lily sees Snape’s eyes flickering briefly in her direction. She pretends not to have noticed it, as she has done every time they happened to meet before - it is easy because most of the time Snape doesn’t even seem to be able to look at her. And tonight she has more pressing things in her mind than an old friendship.

She knows Dumbledore will turn to her and James as soon as Snape leaves the room.

And he does, asking for their help to gather the old gang. The Order of the Phoenix.

Lily thinks of everyone that won’t be there for this second time and tries not to let this crush her heart. She doesn’t have time for old grieves today either. Harry needs her.

And, by God, how he needs. She sees the bandages in his arm, in his head; there are dark spots under his eyes, giving him a spooky look - he slept so little before he was awakened with the cries in the hall. And now the world he knows is falling around him, even if he doesn’t understand the full extension yet…

Everything will change now.

‘I will go’, James says softly, and Lily sees him watching her and Harry. James looks somber, much more than she has seen him in the last thirteen years, with that expression she didn’t really miss: the face of a soldier that was getting in a war he didn’t want to, but he would because he believed in everything he was fighting for.

She doesn’t want him to go, but someone has to, Lily knows. It is very important that people know the truth before it can be muffled, and they need to be ready. They need as much advantage as they can get.

Still, the idea of being away from James right now hurts her almost physically, an old familiar feeling of the unknowns that a war brings.

‘But… Dad…’, Harry’s voice is weak, but it is his tone that scares Lily. Harry sounds afraid for the first time that night - as if he too understands the possibility that James will walk off the door and not return.

She thinks of Cedric Diggory. His parents watched him enter a maze and he never returned. She can’t promise safety for Harry, not anymore; his trust in it has been broken forever.

He has faced death now.

‘I will be back before you awake, Harry’, James says soothingly, patting Harry’s feet over the blanket. ‘Right now I must do what I can, okay?’

Harry doesn’t look like he agrees, but he whispers: ‘Okay’.

James glances back at Lily. In those few seconds, she can read the fear in his eyes, not for himself, but for them; being away from his family at this moment doesn’t feel right for him either. But there is a fierce resolution in his eyes too, a notion of duty that James Potter will do everything he can for them, and Lily answers with a soft kiss on his lips.

Come back for us, is what she says in that kiss. If you want to do something for us, then come back.

‘I love you’, James whispers quietly, only for her, and she hears his promise of return in his voice.

And then he is gone.

She turns to Harry, sitting at the edge of his bed. Dumbledore tells him he will talk to the Diggorys and Lily closes her eyes as he leaves, fighting back a will to cry. It is the easiest thing to imagine what the Diggorys are going through and that scares her a lot.

Oh, God, Lily thinks to herself. Voldemort has returned only for a couple of hours now, the war has not even really begun, and she is fearful of everything already.

But she puts on her brave face. Later, when she is alone (or rather with James, his arms around her, preferably in the bedroom of the house they built together), she will let her feelings flow. Now, she needs to be there for Harry.

Lily opens her eyes, looking around. Ron and Hermione are staring at Harry, biting their lips as if they are on the edge of speech, but Harry’s eyes are fixed on the ceiling and nobody talks for a while.

She grabs the bottle of potion in the bedside cabinet, brushing the sack of gold as she does it. The sack falls in the ground, the sounds of metal coins echoing in the room. Harry winces as if that pains him.

‘You need to take your potion, Harry’, Lily tells him kindly, picking up the sack on the floor.

‘I don’t want it’, Harry murmurs. ‘The gold, I mean, I shouldn’t have won it. Ced… Cedric should have it’.

Lily tries to stop her hand from shaking as she uncorks the bottle of potion. It doesn’t work, but Harry doesn’t seem to notice as he holds the potion she gives him.

His brows are furrowed as if he is trying very hard to control himself.

‘It wasn’t your fault, Harry’, she tells him, knowing she will have to repeat it a thousand times until he believes it.

‘It is’, he argues emotionless. ‘I told him to come with me. He was… the spare’.

Lily doesn’t know what he means by that, but she can’t ask right now. Harry is breathing through his mouth now, his lips trembling and he absolutely refuses to look at anyone. She knows his expression.

It’s the same on her face when she can’t cry at the moment.

Harry doesn’t want an audience. He was never one to feel comfortable with his emotions in public.

‘Drink your potion’, she orders gently, trying to force him to lie down, though he remains sitted. ‘We will let you rest -’

‘No’, he cuts her off, taking her hand in his. Harry looks around briefly, his head down as if he doesn’t want to meet anyone’s eyes, and then he whispers: ‘Stay... stay close to me’.

It’s the way Harry says it that breaks her. His voice is guilty as if he doesn’t want to be this weak, this dependant, the words seemingly escaping his mouth against his will. He is pleading to her, asking for comfort as he did when he was three-year-old and the thunder scared him and he was ashamed of it; Lily remembers him refusing James’ company, asking specifically for hers instead.

It is a son’s plea for his mother.

‘I’m always with you, Harry’, she promises him, bending down and placing her arms around her. She thinks Harry should hate her, because she feels a liar - she wasn’t there for her son tonight. Harry faced everything alone, as brave as he could, but all by himself, him against Voldemort, no lingering ghost of his parents to support him.

And yet Harry doesn’t yell, doesn’t accuse her of anything. He accepts her, raising his arms to hug her too almost desperately, and Lily hears him sobbing. It is a cry of misery, a cry that speaks how tired her teenage son is and how sorrowful he is for everything that happened, even when it is not his fault.

‘I’m here’, she tells him softly, caressing his hair, urging him to feel he is loved and protected by his mother.

There is a loud noise and they break apart. Harry’s face is drenched with tears and, as Lily blinks hers away, she realizes she was crying too. She dries them away quickly, before quietly wiping Harry’s face too. He is refusing to meet her eyes now, looking embarrassed and so young.

She kisses his forehead tenderly.

'Sleep, Harry', she whispers.

Harry takes the potion, drinking it in one gulp, and then his head is falling heavily on the pillow. Lily arranges his hair, then smoothes his blanket. Now, at least, in a dreamless sleep, Harry looks calmer, more like the fourteen-year-old boy he should be and yet never will.

She sits back on the chair, in a quiet vigil, waiting for James to return so they can be there, together, for when Harry wakes up.

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rngknsk · 3 years

Text

The Aftermath

Chapter 1: Consciousness

Sanemi Shinazugawa/Reader (F)

You find yourself alive at the Butterfly Estate beside your closest friend after the final battle against Muzan Kibutsuji. You both are hurting over the loss of your comrades, so you must find a way to comfort each other.

**THIS SHORT STORY CONTAINS SPOILERS FOR THE END OF THE DEMON SLAYER MANGA. DO NOT READ IF YOU HAVEN’T FINISHED THE MANGA.**

Tags/warnings: Shared trauma, angst, survivors guilt, slight tw, comfort, slight fluff, reader is a Hashira

You can also read here on Ao3. Enjoy!

It’s not your time yet, young one, you still have a long journey ahead of you.

Be sure to live a life that will inspire others every day, please know that I will always love you.

We will always be here, watching you, waiting for you. We know you will do great, we are so proud of you, Y/N. Live on.

✾✾

Rain pattering gently against the window stirred you from your dreams. You blinked a few times as you peeled your eyelids apart, feeling the discomfort of the built-up eye-crusts that had grown as you slept for the past few days, to which you didn’t realize just yet. Your mouth felt dry as you slowly smacked your tongue against the roof of your mouth. Your tongue felt swollen. Staring up at the dimly lit, wooden ceiling of the building that protected you from the rain outside, you took a few moments to try to recall where exactly you were. You remained in a numb physical state, or so it felt; you just needed to fully wake up. When you did, all of the memories came flooding back.

You tried to pull yourself upright in the bed you found yourself on, but immediately froze as the pain shocked and ran through every nerve in your body. You shut your eye and let out a sharp inhale through your gritted teeth that interrupted the silence of the room, trying to ease the pain. It was then that you realized your left eye was covered. Slowly, you brought your bandaged hand up to your face, pressing your scarred fingertips to your cheek. Your head had been wrapped several times with a bandage that ran at a slight angle across your face and over your eye.

It was a long, final battle between the demon slayer corps and the demons. The war that was fought for centuries, even millennia, had finally been won, and because you remembered your victory, you were able to slump peacefully back into the bed you laid upon. You laid for a few long moments, the ringing in your ears starting to fade away, allowing you to finally relish in the serene sounds of the rain against the roof.

“You’re finally awake,” came a familiar voice to your left. You hesitated for a moment, tears welling up in your uncovered eye, realizing who the voice belonged to.

You slowly turned your head towards the voice before gasping out his name, “Shinazugawa-san?”

He met your alarmed gaze with a kind smile that made your heart feel warm and fuzzy, and it just might have been enough to cure the aches among the rest of your worn-out body. You wanted to tear the blanket right off of your figure and throw yourself upon him in a triumphant embrace, you wanted to bury your face into his neck and cry, but neither of you were in any physical condition for that.

Your fellow Hashira lay sitting up in his bed, covered in bandages from head to torso, arms to shoulders. He was certainly in a rougher state than you, but for good reason. Sanemi Shinazugawa risked his life for the sake of humanity against the demons, and the most feared of all, Muzan Kibutsuji. He was ruthless in every battle he’s fought, but until he butted heads with Kibutsuji, you’d never seen him so merciless. At the end of the fight, you were sure he’d never pull through. Before you passed out from exhaustion and blood loss, you caught a glimpse of his bloodied figure sprawled across the ground. The last thing you saw was Kibutsuji crumbling away, and with that sight you allowed yourself to finally drift off, to that you imagined would be death.

But it wasn't.

Instead, you woke up next to the man whom you’ve come a long way to care so much about. He was such a tough nut to crack, but you and Sanemi had become so close, and you were sure that you’d meet him in the afterlife along with many others, but rather, you woke up just a few feet away from him at the Butterfly Estate. With that you were beyond thankful at another chance. This time you were sure that you’d tell him how you’d truly feel. Now, finally, you’ll be able to express to Sanemi how important he is to you without any worry of an unexpected end, unlike the last time you opened your heart to someone.

“I’m surprised, you slept longer than I,” he continued. “I was thinking for sure that I’d never wake up, and instead I woke up to you still napping.”

You couldn’t help but chuckle at his comment. You figured he was trying to make a lighthearted joke, so you thought you’d at least react somehow. “I’m sorry, I thought I wouldn’t make it either.”

“You’re a tough girl, I knew you’d be just fine, unlike the others,” he slightly turned his gaze to the floor, a solemn expression curtaining his face.

Before you could ask, three Kakushi rushed into the room that you and Sanemi were resting in, audible gasps coming from behind their masks.

“S-She’s awake!” one cried as he ran out of the room. The other two hurried to your side to take your vitals.

“Please sit back L/N-sama, don’t strain yourself!”

“Yes, your wounds are still fresh and healing, don’t try to move until the nurses arrive!”

✾✾

Hours later, your bandages were rewrapped after you enjoyed a nice bath with the help of the Kakushi. They had given you an extraordinary painkilling formula that had been invented by Shinobu Kocho, the Insect Hashira and outstanding pharmaceutical expert, prior to her death. It was almost as if she created the formula in preparation of Kibutsuji’s attack. You had learned of the deaths of many, including the other remaining Hashira, with the exception of Sanemi and Giyuu Tomioka. You prayed to them as you sat in the bath after the Kakushi gave you some time to soak alone. You cried, for they weren’t as lucky as you to be able to know a world without demons, to know a world in which you could live free. However, each and every life that was lost during the battle against Muzan Kibutsuji belonged to those who fought valiantly and believed in the freedom that you were so fortunate to experience.

It was evening now, and the rain had finally stopped. The colorful pastel clouds were moving out of sight, and the falling sun gleamed brilliantly between the damp leaves of the trees it tried to hide behind. The dew drops sparkled against the rays before they each slid off of the leaves at their own individual pace. You slowly walked yourself outdoors to the engawa, which is where you found Sanemi. He was sitting by himself, a single leg hanging off of the engawa edge while his other was propped up in front of him. You’d never seen him so quiet and peaceful looking, even with his back towards you. You didn’t want to startle him or disrupt his alone time, but you wanted to talk to him. You wanted to know what he was thinking; what was going through that mind of his?

“Shinazugawa-san,” your voice gently hit the breeze, carrying your greeting to his ears. His head slightly perked up, but his gaze remained forward. He didn’t respond, but rather patted the wood floor beside him. After a moment of noticing his gesture, you stepped forward to slowly lower yourself next to him, gritting your teeth to suppress any signs of pain from your injuries. Once seated beside your friend, you glanced out of the side of your eye to see a single tear rolling down his cheek. The sight punctured your very soul. After all these years, training and fighting beside this battle-hardened man, you never thought you’d see him cry. Of course, he lost his younger brother during the battle, so it seemed he was taking this time to grieve; you were just surprised that he allowed you so close to be able to see him in such a state.

“Genya would have liked this view, don’t you think?” Sanemi broke the silence, fighting away the cracking of his voice. “When we were kids, we would always watch the sun set in the evening. It was one of the things that really helped us forget how shitty the world was for us back in those days. Seeing his bright, wide eyes and that happy expression was what pushed me to continue forward every time. But now…” he finally turned away, wiping his remaining tears with his sleeves. “I just wish he could be here to see it, to see the sun set in a world where we don’t have to fight for our lives anymore.”

You didn’t know how to respond. It seemed as if the best option would be to let him talk and express how he was feeling. It was, after all, better than him bottling things up, similar to what he’s done for his entire life. Genya wasn’t the only person that Sanemi has lost. You couldn’t forget what he had told you about, what had happened to his family, what he had to do to protect Genya way back then. He’s lost family, friends, others… And you did too, but this wasn’t about you. Right now, you had to comfort someone who was very dear to you.

“I wish he was here too,” you spoke, leaning yourself towards him to rest a hand upon his shoulder. You hoped your gesture would help ease him. “I wish… everyone was here. Our families, our friends,” you lowered your head for a moment in respect, saying a silent prayer for those who had been lost. When you looked back up you found that he had turned to your direction, and you locked eyes with him. His expression was absolutely pitiful. You could feel him tense up when you began to involuntarily squeeze his shoulder faintly. “But we must live on. Live on for them, or else their sacrifices would not be worth anything. Please, Shinazugawa-san, know this,” you rested your other hand upon his, which was laying atop his lap. “Every person that you have ever loved is always watching over you, and they are so proud of you, including myself,” you smiled warmly as you concluded your words of reassurance.

Trapped in each other’s watery eyes, there was a sure understanding between you both. You knew how he felt, and he knew that of you. Ever so gently, Sanemi leaned forward to rest his forehead upon yours. His hand reached up and rested behind your head, pressing you even closer to him. As you both sat there beneath the dimming purple skies, you quietly thanked whatever higher beings allowed you both to survive hell and finally find paradise. Stars began peeking through the pastel-colored atmosphere, and the air felt fresher than it ever had before. You both shared a smile.

“Thank you for everything, L/N-san.”

✾✾

#shinaguzawa sanemi #sanemi shinaguzawa #sanemi #shinazugawa #sanemi shinazugawa x reader #kny x reader #kny #kimetsu no yaiba #demon slayer #fanfic #angst #comfort #fluff

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legaciezzz · 3 years

Text

Boy Problems

Hope x Male Reader

Genre: Chapter Fic

Request: Hi, uh so I'm new to the legacies fandom so if this request sucks.. Sorry. Could you do one where the readers a human and mystic falls high. Hopes upset that landon moving on and is lonely, the readers also sad becuase he just got dumped, so they become fuck buddies but fall for each other. When everyone remembers hope, landon tries to win hope back but she's already fallen in love with the reader and picks him over landon. Uh if you Could write smut please.. If you're comfortable that is

A/N: Welcome to the fandom! Don't worry the request is just fine!

Song: Imported by Jesse Reyez ft. 6lack

You sighed before stepping out of your car. It had been two weeks since your ex dumped, just as things seemed to be getting serious, so now you've been spending nights like these alone lately. You got out and started to walk across town square, as you made you way to the grill you noticed a girl on one of the benches, but the closer you got you could hear some crying.

"Hey."

Hope glanced up at you then quickly looked away to wipe her tears. "Hey."

"You okay?" you said.

"Yeah. Just boy problems."

"I feel that-- I mean girl problems, not boy problems." You stammered as you tried to correct yourself, which made her huff a laugh. "I'm Y/N, by the way."

"Hope."

"Hey, you know what helps with boy problems? Stuffing your face with food. I'm actually heading to the grill if you want, must be pretty chilly out here."

She looked up at you and flashed a soft smile. "I'm fine."

You nodded before heading off inside but later came back with a to go bag and a milkshake.

"Mind if I sit here?" you asked.

Hope didn't expect to see you as she looked up over her shoulder again.

"I know what you said, but misery loves company, right?"

"Thanks." she said, sliding over.

You sat down, laying the food out between you two. "I don't know what you like, so I just got you a burger and fries."

"That's alright."

“You want to talk about it? The boy problems?”

“You know, I’ve kind of spilled my guts to a stranger already.”

“Well I bet that stranger didn’t get you any comfort food.” you said, popping a french fry in you mouth.

“Actually, he did give me a peanut butter blast.”

“Peanut butter blast, really? I’ve always kind of thought was overrated.”

Hope raised her eyebrows with a light smile. “Oh really? And what’s your shake of choice?”

“Strawberry. And you know what’s even better than that?” You took the lid off your milkshake and dipped another one of your fries in it.

“What are you doing?” she laughed.

“What? It’s good, it’s the perfect combination of sweet and salty. Come on, don’t hate on it until you’ve tried it.”

She shook her head. “No way.”

“Fine, but you’re missing out.” you said, eating it.

The two sat on the bench and talked while you ate. You asked her if she was new in town so you gave a run down of the workings of Mystic Falls and Hope nodded along to all the things she already knew and then you both got into your relationship problems. Then eventually it got late and was time to go home.

“You need a ride home?”

“No, it’s fine. You’ve already done enough, it’s all good.”

“You sure? It’s really not a problem.”

“I’m sure. I, uh, live close to to here actually.”

“Alright then. “ you said getting up, and patting your pockets for that pencil you forgot to put in your binder. “Well I’m just going to leave my number here on this napkin and if you need a friend or anything, feel free to hit me up.”

. . .

You got home after the big fight with the stallions and was patching yourself up when Hope sent you a text asking if you were free to hang out.

"Hey. Come in."

"Hey. Your parents home?" she asked as she stepped inside, making sure she wasn't interrupting anything.

"No. My mom's working late and my dad's out with some friends, we're good." you assured her before closing the door behind her.

You made your way back to the couch to make another attempt at bandaging your hand and that's when Hope saw it along with the shiner on your temple.

"What happened?" she asked, sparked with concern.

"You did hear? There was this huge brawl between the Timberwolves and the Stallions after the game. Again apparently."

"Are you okay?"

"Oh yeah, don't worry it could've been worse. Like this one guy, Aaron: broken nose."

You continued to wrap your hand until Hope intervened, taking a seat next to you. "Here. Let me help you with that." she said, seeing as you were doing it wrong.

You watched her, she was gentle and you noticed how soft her hands were. You then looked up at her and just stared for a moment.

"What?" Hope asked, catching you after she was done.

"Nothing." you said, but still somehow you couldn't take your eyes off her. She was just so pretty. You just kept staring into those blue eyes of hers, then you noticed your gaze slipping down to her lips.

To your surprise, she leaned in first for the kiss. You kissed once before pulling back, then you both dove back in. She grabbed your neck and pulled you closer while your went up her thigh. Eventually, you found yourself on top of her, your hand gliding up to her breast.

You could feel yourself growing hard as things progressed, and so could she. She broke away from you. "You have any--"

"In my room."

You two got up from the couch and went to your room where you started to strip each other of your clothes, kicking the door shut behind you.

As soon as your underwear fell to the floor she immediately pushed you onto bed, crawling in your lap. You could feel your cock getting even stiffer from her hips rocking back and forth.

You reached over into your desk drawer beside your bed and took out a condom. Hope lifted her hips up so you could slip the rubber on. She lowered herself onto you. Moans fell from both of your lips as she adjusted to your size.

She wrapped her arms around you as she began to ride you, her pace starting slow. she let out a moan which was muffled by your lips. She held on tight as you rocked your body. You felt your lips move along her jaw as your hands grabbed her ass.

"Fuck.." she groaned as you nipped at her ear.

You moved down, biting gently down on her collarbone and leaving a mark. Hope bit her lip as she started to ride harder. You felt your lips move along her bare chest as you moved downward. You used your bandaged hand to knead her breast . As you did so Hope arched her back, moaning as you teased her.

"Ah..yeah..." You moved your lips to her nipple, sucking on it and making her gasp.

You stopped her a second then flipped her over onto the bed, as you did so you lost your balance and fell on top of her. You both laughed as you propped yourself back up.

“Sorry, that usually goes better.” you said.

Hope giggled as she kissed you. She pressed your body up against hers as you slid back into her. You started to thrust your hips and eventually you found your way back to the pace you guys were once at before as you felt her legs wrap around your waist.

"Mmmm.." you moaned.

"Oh fuck.." Hope whined.

You quickened your pace and a few moments later you could feel yourself coming closer to your climax. You could also tell she was coming as her body convulsed and she dug her nails into your back. You gently ran your fingertips over her clit.

"I'm gonna..." she said in a long-winded whine as you felt her tighten around you.

You guys came and rode out your highs together. You collapsed besides her. “Wow..”

“Yeah...” Once you guys caught your breath, she got up and slipped on your shirt. “I should get cleaned up.”

“For sure,” you said, sitting up. “It’s the second door on the right.”

She left and you took of your condom and threw it away, using a tissue to clean off the excess on you. You then crashed back on to the bed and when Hope got back, you were already passed out.

The next morning, the both of you tangled amongst the sheets, you were woken up by a loud knock at your door. "Y/N, get up. You're gonna be late for school." you heard your father say.

You swore under your breath as you glanced over to Hope who looked just as startled as you. "I'm up." you called out.

"I'm off to work. And your mom's asleep so don't wake her up."

"Alright, see ya."

You waited for your father to leave before you and Hope started to scramble for your clothes and slip them on.

As you guys made you way to the door, you paused when you caught a glance of the kitchen. "Shit. Hey, I'll buy you breakfast on our way to school."

"it's fine, you don'––"

"You serious? Breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Don't worry about it." you smiled, holding the door for her.

You pulled up to the school after making a pitstop for some coffee and whatnot. You sat awkwardly quiet for a second before Hope opened the door.

"Thanks." Hope said.

"Yeah, no problem.. I had a good time last night."

"Me too... Anyways I should probably get going." She opened the door and step, grabbing her coffee, then Maya ran into her.

"Y/N, I didn't know you knew Hope." Maya greeted.

"Just giving the her a ride, that's all." you replied, flashing a friendly smile.

"And a coffee? I should let you drive me around too." she joked.

"Alright, I better find a place to park. See you guys around."

While you drove off, Maya teased Hope about you as they walked together, but Hope wasn't really one to kiss and tell.

You guys still saw each other around school, but the next time you hooked up was at a house party Maya convinced Hope to going to. You had caught her sitting on a couch as everyone else mingled. You managed to get her to loosen up and dance with you then when one thing led to another, you two ended up hook up in the bathroom.

After that you and Hope found yourselves hooking up even more, mostly when you were feeling lonely. Then because it felt good and you had grown really fond of each other. As your 'relationship' progressed, you started hooking up not just outside of school, like texting each other during class to make out under the bleachers. Soon people started notice how much you two hung out, the hickeys on your neck and how Hope sometimes wore your letterman's jacket.

There was a fine line between whether you and Hope were dating or just something casual. You agreed on labelling yourselves as friends, even though at this point you knew there was a real connection forming, but you were okay with that or at least you thought you were. There would be days where she would run off with no explanation and when she returned she suddenly started act strange around you.

"I don't know, Man, she just seems weird all the time lately. You think it's her ex?" you said to Ethan as you helped set up for the Commonwealth Day festival.

"Have you thought of talking to her, maybe?" He replied.

"Come on, no one wants to be that guy."

"Do you like her?"

"I don't know. Things are just better when she's around and I don't want anything screw it up."

"Then I think you know what you should do. Anyways, we should get to practice."

As you guys left for practice, you looked around for Hope only to find that she disappeared somewhere. This was becoming very like her now.

You kept thinking about Hope throughout the day and what you might say. You tried texting her a couple times here and there, but she didn't answer.

After you when done with you were done with your plans for the day, you went to the festival where saw Hope at one of the tables.

"Hope?" you said, taking a seat by her.

"Y/N. Hey." she said a bit solemnly.

"Where have you been all day? I tried texting you."

"Sorry. Something came up with some old friends."

"Yeah, that seems to be happening a lot lately." You sighed. "Hey, I need to ask you something."

She looked at you and just at you were about to open your mouth, you were interrupted.

"Hope?"

You both turned your heads to see a curly haired boy.

"Landon."

#hope x male reader #hope mikaelson imagine #legacies #smut

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hornedsimp · 3 years

Note

Ayeee its ya boi, schlatt addict-

So last year I got my foot caught in a bear trap, and I was just thinking about if the reader got hurt during a fight with another mc youtuber (in game ofc) and schlatt finds them really badly hurt, and he has to take care of them. Bc they can't walk and ya know ✨b l o o d✨

So yeah thats my idea, peace ✌

Oh dear god, I hope that everything it’s alright with your leg now!

Thanks for taking the time to request this, it’s so soft and I love it so much!

I hope you like it!

--------------------------------

Jschlatt x Reader (Fluff)

--------------------------------

Warnings: Cursing, mention of alcohool, light level of violence at the beggining.

That's what I got, but if you see anything that you want me to put in the warnings please let me know

▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎▪︎

You had gotten into a pretty bad fight with Willbur after Schlatt had announced the festival, you were walking around the city, to make sure everything was fine when you had spotted him at the top of a tree, his eyes once so caring filled with rage.

You knew that wasn't the Willbur you met long ago, and since you were on Schlatt's side now, you went to confront him, it didn't end up well for you.

No one was expecting to fight on the day of the announcement, for that reason you weren't with your netherite armor, only wearing the black suit you liked so much to seem more serious.

It was a pretty suit, yes, but it didn't work well against arrows and a diamond sword, granted, you couldn't even imagine how Willbur got his hands on a diamond sword when he was wearing the dirtiest outfit you've seen in ages.

Nonetheless, the fight dragged through the forest, as both of you were screaming at each other, Willbur trying to make you see how he was the victim of the system, trying to get back to the country he loved so much, while you were trying to explain why the rules were made to keep him away.

When he stopped trying to convince you that he wasn't doing anything bad, and started to attack you with more rage than before, you knew you were right since the beginning, Willbur had gone mad in his exile.

He shouted curses at you, throwing punches in your direction until he could trip you and hold you down on the ground, he got his sword with hands trembling, a dangerous smile on his face as he put the sword at the top of your chest, you tried to move, tears forming in your eyes as you screamed trying to get him to lose his balance so you could escape.

It was to no avail, you could feel the sword slowly making contact with your skin, the pain running through your skin slowly, almost taunting you to do something to stop it.

You bit hard on the inside of your cheeks, tasting your own blood trying to not focus on the pain, it would only get worst and worst, you closed your eyes waiting for the blackness to swallow you whole right after Wilbur pierced through your chest, but the void never came to take you out.

What came instead was another sudden wave of pain, this time concentrating on your leg, as you opened your eyes, you could see the blood running through your chest, but what got your attention, was the sword impelled at your leg, there was blood everywhere, your clothes ripped in many places where Willbur had attacked you.

And thinking about the devil, he was gone, no words or apologies, no shadow lurking behind the trees to see if you would survive, simply gone.

As the adrenaline in your body started to go down, and the pain got bigger, your eyes started to close, they felt too heavy, but you knew deep down you couldn't pass out from the pain in the middle of the forest, so you did the only thing you could think of.

You called Schlatt for help, since your arms weren't too damaged to move, you grasp on the small string of consciousness to open the message board everyone could use as a sort of direct link to each other.

Typing out your coordinates you pressed sent, letting your hands fall limp close to your body, and finally letting yourself crave the dark embrace that awaited for you, telling yourself that it would be fine once schlatt found you, your vision turned dark, and you blacked out.

-------------------------------------------------------

When you woke up again, you were in a large room, in a massive bed, with lots of blankets organized messily around you, there was an enormous window from where you could see Manberg in all of its glory, as you were trying to get a better view by moving, the door of the room opened, revealing schlatt, with a tired expression carrying a small plate with what seemed to be mushroom soup.

"What the fuck you think you're doing woman?" He asked with his loud voice practically running to your side.

"Trying to get up?" You asked still trying to move your body to at least sit on the bed more comfortably.

"Yeah that's the fucking problem dumb bitch, you can't move or else the stitches can get worst." Schlatt argued putting the plate on the bed table at your side.

He pulled the blankets off of you so you could see the white bandages covering your leg, quickly you pulled your shirt a little so you could peek at your chest, there was also white bandages firmly wrapped in your torso, you looked at schlatt, feeling your face get hot as you pieced together the pieces of what probably had happened after you blacked out alone in the forest.

Before you could say anything about the whole situation though, Schlatt let out a sigh, rolling his eyes dramatically.

"Don't ever think about that, I asked Nikki to help with the bandages, and she is the one that dresses you up on some spare clothes she had with her."

You could feel yourself relax at that, nodding your head slightly Schlatt approached you, moving his hands so he could support your torso and pull you up, making you sit on the bed, after making sure you were comfortable enough the hybrid handed you the small plate with the soup.

"Nikki thinks you're going to be able to walk in two weeks, but if you have any problem with the wound, it can take three weeks or more, you can stay here while you're healing." Schlatt says before leaving the room.

You blink a few after he leaves, your face still a little hot as you think about how careful he held you to help you move your body, deciding to not give yourself a headache thinking about it, you start to eat the soup, only to be interrupted again by Schallat entering the room.

He was carrying a shit ton of magazines and random books, the hybrid crossed the room to come to the other side of the bed and let all of the magazines down at your side, he sat right beside you and moved the magazines around so you could see all of the titles.

" I also thought... you could get bored, so I got some shit for you to read if you want to." Schlatt said with a proud smile.

You could only smile in return and offer a quiet "thanks" as you went back to eat the soup, after you finished Schlatt quickly took the place and went out to the kitchen as you moved around a little, picking a random magazine you moved the others away so there could be more space for the president in the bed.

You knew he wouldn't leave your side, not until you were completely okay again, he was just looking out for you in his way, standing close and making sure you wouldn't have any problem in your recovery.

Just as you expected, he came back soon after leaving the plate at the sink, he sat once again beside you, putting his head at your shoulder you hummed quietly, moving your hand so you could caress the side of his face.

You had learned long ago that the ram hybrid was pretty touch starved, although he kept the charade of a tough guy that doesn't need anything else other than his whiskey, you've been on his side for what seemed like forever now.

Schlatt took your hand, placing a soft kiss on your wrist before moving his head, headbutting you lightly to gain your attention, you moved your gaze from the current magazine on your lap to his face.

"Don't ever do this again to me alright?" He said in a more serious tone, his fingers tracing the lines of your hand.

"Okay, I'll make sure to not get hurt again to take up your bed." You snorted with a small smile forming on your face.

"You know what I'm talking about, don't give me another heart attack like this one, I thought I lost you when you sent the coordinates and didn't answer when I asked what was happening." He held your hands more firmly, afraid that you would suddenly vanish right in front of his eyes.

Placing a small kiss on his temples you smiled with confidence, headbutting him lightly like how he had done moments ago.

"Don't worry, I promise to do my best to not get stabbed again."

That got Schlatt to laugh as he gave you some more space, squeezing your hand he moved on the bed, sticking his legs out and pushing a blanket over himself.

"You better do your fucking best alright, now, let's talk shit about those magazine people, and how they look so uncomfortable in the covers."

#dream smp #IGDSMP #c!schlatt #c!schlatt x reader #imagine

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avungerthatgotaway · 3 years

Text

The Soldier of the Night

heyyyy guys!! this is my first ever request fic and im so excited to do iiiit. please tell me what you think of it in the comments🥰

it's made for this request

summary: y/n finally takes matters into her own hands and escapes hydra. but it won't be as easy as she tought...

warnings: mentions of blood and child neglect

pairings: avengers x teen!reader (platonic)

genre: angst-ish, fluff at the end

Sorry for grammar mistakes.

If you have request feel free to ask🥰

----------------------------

Y/N Y/LN, but no one calls you by that name. To the world you are known as The Soldier of the Night, the merciless murderer. Mothers all over the world use you to teach their kids about most dreadful dangers. People gather around campfire in woods and share scary stories of your cold heart and homicides you don't feel guilty about. You are the biggest fear of each and every government there is in world.

And you always wonder what all those people would say if they knew how old you were. Or that you never kill willingly. Or that you silently pray every night for the victims you harmed or killed in your brainwashed state.

Or that hydra has no control over you anymore. You are currently running, without exact destination, just to get as far from hydra as you can. They are probably alerted of your absence by this point, but you are already in New York, so you can maybe find a hiding spot before they find you.

-Avengers pov

Nick Fury hurried to the avengers tower, where he called a sudden meeting this morning.

When he came in Steve and Sam were sweaty, probably just came from their morning jog. Bucky was still fighting sleep in his pyjamas, hair sticking out in different directions. Wanda was starring daggers at him for waking her up so early. Tony and Bruce were in lab coats, probably didn't sleep at all. All other avengers were at their respective missions.

"I called this meeting because my resources told me infamous Soldier of the Night is out of hydra HQ. We don't know why, but it's probably another killing mission for hydra. He is currently laying low, somewhere around south entrance to the city. Your mission is to stop him from harming anyone and bring him here. Alive if possible, it would benefit us to know what are hydra's plans at the moment." he finished.

"Alright." said Steve dutifully. "Any information we can get on him before we go?"

"Not much. Only that he is dangerous, and doesn't spare anyone. He is a ghost story. We don't even know if it's a he, that's just a guess."

"Very well. Everyone suit up, I expect you in front of tower in 10." Steve said and left, other avengers following behind.

They came back that evening, exhausted of their unsuccessful search. There was no trace of the soldier. But they had to keep looking as long as there's hope to get rid of the monster.

-2nd person pov

Your heart was racing a hundred miles. You were well aware of the possibility of hydra finding you. But you didn't expect it to be this soon. You were in hiding for only 2 months and they already tracked you down.

Windows broke on your left side and hydra agents started piling in. At the same time on your right side the door broke down revealing whole avengers team, with few additions. You faintly remember one of them as The Winter Soldier, but what was he doing with avengers? Your toughts were cut short by a punch in your face delivered by one of hydra agents.

That's when it snapped: you had to fight for your life. And you probably had to fight both sides.

You started fighting hydra agents, harming them as much as you can without killing.

The avengers stand at the doorstep, and you faintly hear one of them saying "What the actual fuck?". They seemed belivered.

But they soon join the fight knocking out hydra agents. A fist connected with the back of your head, knocking you out into pool of darkness.

Light clacking of bottles was the first thing you hear when you wake up. You squint your eyes open, panic finnaly kicking in to where you are. Your first tought was that you were back in hydra HQ, but the room was way too light for that, and hydra wanted you dead.

You started panicking and franatically got out of the bed, trying to escape. Whoever this is, they nean no good. Even avengers want to kill you. But as soon as you got up, black dots invaded your vision, causing you to fall. But before you hit the groung a pair of arms caught you, leading you to sit back in bed.

"Hey, hey sweetie calm down. No one will harm you here. Don't make any sudden movements, your head is still not completely healed." a man told you.

You just layed back and watched him bandage your wrist.

"I am Bruce Banner, by the way. What is your name?" he asked kindly.

"Y/N Y/LN" you whispered, almost inaudibly but he heard it.

"Alright, Y/N. I think I bandaged all your bruises. Rest of the team is waiting out, do you maybe want to meet them?"

By 'team' he probably meant rest of the avengers. You saw a big 'A' painted on the wasll, so that had to be it, right? You immediately shook your head no, eyes widening in fear. You still weren't sure they won't harm you, and meeting them seemed overwhelming in your current state.

"It's okay, calm down. You can meet them later. I will stay with you a little. We could talk if you want?"

You just shrugged your shoulders, not particularly fond of talking with anyone, but not wanting to seem rude because he did help you.

"Okay. How old are you Y/N?" he asked slowly.

"(your age)" you quietly said.

"Dear lord, you really are just a kid. I'm so sorry for everything you've gone through."

You just zoned out, thinking about everything that happened, when something poped up in your mind.

"Mr. Banner?" you asked shyly.

"Call me Bruce kiddo. What is it?"

"I tought I saw The Winter Soldier at the door when you guys came to get me?"

"Oh yes. Bucky. He was also in hydra, as you probably know. He was brainwashed. I suppose you were too?"

"I was, every time I killed somebody. Sometimes I went to missions with other agents and they didn't brainwash me, but I never killed anyone when I was in my senses." You started thinking about your victims as teers pooled in your eyes.

"We supposed so. Do you want me to bring Bucky in a little? Maybe he can help you feel better, because he knows what you're going through."

You slowly nodded, not wanting to reject meeting avengers the second time.

"Alright, he'll be here in a minute." Bruce gave you a gentle smile and patted your shoulder.

A minute after he exited, in came Bucky. He looked better than when you saw him last, but you doubted he's seen you. You were sneaking out, tryna find some food, when you heard and saw agents torturing him. That's about only memory you have of him, along with stories you've heard from other people.

"Hello there doll. How are you? Bruce told me you remember me." he said gently, sitting at the edge of your bed.

"I-I am alright, i guess. Th-thanks. And yes, I do. A little. I was passing by door, when I saw them torturing y-yo-you." you started sobbing a little, the memory bringing back others. Memories of them torturing you. And you torturing other people in your brainwashed state.

"Hey don't cry. It's okay, shhh. Come here." he opened his arms, and you hesitantly scooted closer, not exactly sure what he wanted. He circled his arms around you, and you flinched, thinking he's gonna attack you. But he just gently kept his arms wrapped around you, soothingly rubbing you back. after some time you wraoed your arms around his middle, still not sure what's going on.

But it was a nice feeling. You never felt something like it before. You felt so safe, like nothing could harm you as long as you two stay like that. You wanted to know what was all this about.

"Wha-at are you do-oing?" you asked after you stopped sobbing, but still hiccuping a little.

"Oh, I'm hugging you. Are you uncomfortable? I will stop if you are. Sorry." he said starting to draw back.

"No!" you quickly said, clutching onto him like koala. You were afraid the sense of comfort will leave you as soon as he withdraws from you.

"Shhh, doll. I won't let go. Never. Nothing will ever harm you here kiddo. We will take care of you. You can live normal life, like all other kids. Maybe go to school after you adapt to your surroundings. Here is a kid Peter he is about your age. You can make friends your age. And of course we will be your friends. For as long as you want it."

"Wait, I can live here? I'm not a burden?"

"No, of course not. Don't ever think that, please."

"B-Bu-Bru" you struggled to remember what Bruce told you his name was.

"Bucky. Or James, whichever you prefer kid."

"Oh okay. What are hugs Bucky?"

"Well I'm hugging you right now. You hug people ti show your emotions. Like comfort, thankfulness, happiness, love. It's what friends do."

"Wait wait wait. You never had a hug before?? Like ever????" a new voice boomed. It sounded genuine but way too loud. You flinched instinctively and hid your face in Bucky's shoulder. He tightened his hold on you for comfort.

"Can you be any louder Thor? And no she was practically raised in hydra, they don't exactly hug around." Bucky said.

"I am sorry, lady Y/N. For frightening you, and for my inappropriate question. I am Thor Odinson." he said coming closer to you.

"It's okay Mr. Thor. I'm Y/N Y/LN, nice to meet you." you said shyly.

"Oh it's lovely meeting you too. I came here because brother Stark asked me to ask you if our presence is wished upon now."

"Huh, what do you think, doll? Ready to meet 'em now? No pressure." Bucky quietly asked, only for you to hear.

You tought about it for a second, but if everyone is nice as three you already met, you'd like to meet them all. And with quiet "okay", Bucky nodded to Thor and he left to call the others in.

That night you layed in your bed, thinking of that day's events. You met everyone, since no one had missions assigned. They were all really nice to you. Even Loki, which surprised every avenger. You were not sure why tho, Loki was nice, and his voice was comforting. The Maximoff twins were really funny, and Tony already started making you your own room! Everyone else you've met was aweosme: Natasha, Clint, Steve, Sam and Rhodey. Peter was shy but nice, he promised to show you some good movies and he was belivered when you said you don't know what those are.

Bucky was still you favorite. He stayed the longest, promising to come and visit you first thing in the morning. You hoped he'll hug you again, you were quite fond of hugs now.

Few months passed since avengers saved you. Life couldn't be better at this point. You were home schooling, or rather preparing to go to real school next year. Peter already introduced you to his friends from school you are going to attend. You were training to become an avenger, and it was so exciting.

You were currently having breakfast tho, sitting in between Sam and Bucky who were bickering about one thing or other. Tony was dancing funnily while making pancakes, while Nat was trying to throw as many blueberries as possible at him. You heard Clint somewhere in wents above you, probably setting up a prank. You smiled to yourself. Even though you never knew love, or had a family until two months prior, avengers accepted you. They were slowly becoming your family, and you couldn't imagine your life without them. ;)

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mamabearcatfanfics · 3 years

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Out of the Dark

I coloured a sketch this morning, and then this evening after work I decided to write something to go with it. This kinda turned out angsty. Lockdown is obviously getting to me a little. But as always, a happy ending. I'll probably put this in my AO3 one-shots series in the morning.

💜

Inuyasha felt like he was going to die.

They’d been battling a mole youkai, the normally small mammal enlarged to ridiculous proportions by a jewel shard. Everything had been going well until it had somehow caused a landslide. He’d heard Sango and Miroku’s warning yells from high above from their vantage point on Kirara, and Shippou’s wail of fright from over near the trees just moments before the ground gave way, sending both him and Kagome plummeting downwards.

He’d tried to grab her as they went down, her high pitched scream ringing in his ears as their fingers clutched at each other frantically, but it had been no use. She’d been dragged away from him by the landslide, and as he’d concentrated all his efforts on reaching for her he’d lost grip on his fucking sword.

Now he couldn’t hear a thing, all he could smell was damp earth, and he didn’t know which way was up. The pressure coming from all around him felt like half a hillside had fallen on him. He needed to find Kagome and save her, but he was pretty much deaf and blind to what was going on. Useless.

He couldn’t breathe. Squinting his eyes open only exacerbated his fear because he could see nothing but darkness. Feel nothing but darkness. His numbing fingers scrabbled in the earth, but he had no idea if he was digging upwards or downwards. His heart felt like it was going to pound out of his chest, and overwhelming panic sucked at his sanity.

He’d never told anyone, but ever since he was small he’d had an overwhelming fear of small tight spaces. A fear of being trapped in the dark with no way out.

Even though his mother was technically widowed after the death of his father, meaning she could never be forced to remarry, that didn’t stop male members of the court arriving at their home to remind her of how her position had fallen. They came to gloat, to make her beg and scrape for the meager allowance she was provided by her father, who had grudgingly allowed her and her ‘son’ to live in small lodgings on the very edge of his estate. If visitors saw him when they arrived, it never ended well. He was often held up as an example of her ‘disgrace’, mocked and sometimes beaten, with his mother pleading for mercy and trying to stay their hands to no avail.

Eventually she’d managed to create a cubby hole under their floorboards to keep him safe from visitors, knowing she couldn’t physically protect him herself, and it had terrified him. The small tight space. The stench of her panic and fear feeding his own. The knowledge that there was nothing he could do but wait until she let him out again. He would have rather been beaten.

He’d almost forgotten, pushing the memory of that fear to the back of his mind. He’d always made sure he was never in a position where he would be trapped again in the dark. Now that fear had him by the throat, threatening to take away his sense of self. He groaned, struggling to keep hold on his consciousness as his youki swelled in an instinctive push to protect him without the quelling presence of his father’s sword. He needed to hold on. Because letting go would mean death – not his, but someone else’s. And what if that someone was dear to him? He couldn’t bear it. He was already buried. Better to stay that way and die himself than risk anyone else.

But it seemed his instincts didn’t agree with him, overpowering him. He thought despairingly of Kagome as he blacked out, frantically chanting her name, trying to commit her face to memory.

“Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her. Don’t hurt her.”

When he came to, the sunlight was bright around him, and he was taking in great heaving breaths, his heart stuttering in his chest as he knelt on the ground. Tessaiga was clutched tightly in one fist. Blood. He could smell blood. He threw back his head and howled in despair.

But then soft hands cradled his cheeks.

“Inuyasha, it’s okay! You’re okay! Everyone is fine, you didn’t hurt anyone!”

“Kagome”, he whispered brokenly, his eyes still blurry with tears. “Kagome.”

She was crying, shifting her hands from his cheeks to cling around his neck, hugging him tightly to her. Miroku, Sango and Shippou were standing off to one side, quietly waiting.

He sniffed again, realising the scent of blood came from some cuts and scrapes on Kagome caused by the landslide, and from his own hands, the nails cracked and broken.

“You dug me out Inuyasha. You saved me. You didn’t hurt me at all.”

All he could do was hold her tightly and repeat her name, his nose buried in her neck, smelling her sweet smell and feeling her pulse beating steadily in her throat, proof that she was alive and mostly unharmed. Proof that somehow, even when he’d lost himself, he hadn’t lost her too.

It was a quiet and subdued walk back to the village. Miroku and Sango had finished off the mole youkai and retrieved the shard, which was now safely added to the little bottle around Kagome's neck.

He and Kagome had rinsed off the cloying dirt from the landslide in a nearby stream, their clothes drying quickly as they walked in the warmth of the afternoon sun, but Inuyasha still shivered slightly as if he’d caught a chilll. He was having trouble shaking the combined after effects of feeling trapped and losing himself, his mind whirling. Kagome’s tight grip on his hand was helping, but he still didn’t feel like himself, still didn’t feel comfortable in his own skin.

When they arrived back at Kaede’s late that afternoon, he watched the others walk through the door way into the dark interior of the small hut, and stopped short, his hand pulling abruptly at Kagome’s.

“Inuyasha?”

“Gonna stay out here”, he said, turning his head away from Kagome’s gaze as he watched the sudden realisation in her expression as she made the connections. He felt embarrassed and ashamed, but he knew there was no way he’d be able to go inside at the moment, not until he had a better handle on his emotions. Kagome squeezed his fingers.

“Do you mind if I stay out here with you?” she asked gently.

He shook his head and shrugged his shoulders, as if to say he didn’t care one way or the other, even though he desperately wanted to beg her to stay close by. She tugged on his hand, leading him over to the trees beside Kaede’s hut, spreading out her sleeping bag like a picnic blanket, patting it to invite him to sit down beside her.

As soon as he was seated with Tessaiga still firmly within his grasp across his lap, she leaned against him, taking his other hand in hers, examining the healing fingers.

“Do they hurt at all? Do you need me to bandage them?”

He shook his head, not really trusting himself to speak at the moment.

She hummed, stroking her hand over his fingers, resting her head against his shoulder.

“You know, I’m afraid of deep water."

He sighed, shoulders rising stiffly as he tried to keep himself still, wanting to run away from where this conversation was going, but also wanting to stay close to her.

“Kagome...”

"I fell in a friend’s pool when I was a little girl before I knew how to swim properly. I nearly drowned before Papa saved me. I’m a good swimmer now, but I still feel frightened by it sometimes, especially if I can’t see the bottom.”

He didn't say anything. He knew what she was doing, but he couldn't speak. Couldn't trust himself to talk at the moment.

“Those kinds of fears don’t mean you’re not brave”, she continued softly. “Sometimes things happen that you can’t control and your mind remembers that feeling of powerlessness, of fear, and it holds onto it. It can get better over time, with help.” She rubbed her cheek against his shoulder, turning her head to glance up at his face. “But it’s never anything to be ashamed of Inuyasha. You don’t have to talk to me about it if you don’t want to. But if you ever do, I’m here.”

He nodded stiffly, then tried to stifle a yawn. He was exhausted.

“We’ve still got some time before dinner. Why don’t you take a nap with me?”

“It’s not dark yet.”

“So? C’mon. Lay down next to me. I promise I won’t bite”, she giggled, tugging on his hand and kicking off her shoes.

“If I do, will you be quiet?”

“Yup!”

He lay down on the ground as she stretched out on her sleeping bag, one hand still tightly clutching Tessaiga, the other reaching out to gently stroke her cheek. It wasn't only him that had a difficult day.

“I really didn’t hurt you?” he murmured, his voice catching a little. Her eyes were overbright in the late afternoon sunshine as she pressed her cheek into his hand.

“You really didn’t. You knew who I was. I was so scared and then you came for me Inuyasha. You pulled me out of the dark.”

“I’ll always come for you. You know that don’t you?”

She sighed gently, closing her eyes as he struggled to keep his own open, to keep watch, keep her in sight. Finally he gave up, letting his mind drift, knowing she was close by and safe, feeling her slowing breaths drift across his finger tips.

“I do.”

#mamabearcat fanfics #inukag oneshot #I don't even know what this is #hurt comfort fic #inukag

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sirowsky · 3 years

Text

The Bad Day - One Shot

For the person closest to my soul, my wife @lucrezia-thoughts

“Our stories remind us how precious and fragile life can be – and that we must risk our hearts every day to know happiness.” – Luanne Rice

“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow’.” – Mary Anne Radmacher Fluff Can be read as Gender Neutral Reader (gn!reader) Only warning I can think of is Language. Words: 1525

I hope this helps improve your day, my love.

===================== So, you know those days when everything just goes wrong?

When you can’t walk over a threshold without stubbing your toe, or reach for a doorhandle without almost breaking your finger against it? When you knock the milk or juice-carton over, and think ‘phew, at least the cork was still on’ only to realise the damn carton broke? Every paper you touch tries to murder you, anything remotely heavy just fiddles itself out of your hands, and magically lands on your feet, and even your own brain tricks you by misjudging the distance between your shoulder and the fucking doorway, even though it damn well knows exactly how close is too close?

Yeah – that kinda day.

Those were the days that you wanted to lock yourself in your house and just not step outside, but… well, life… and all that.

When you finally reached your lunch-hour on this particular day of personal doom, you felt sure that every singly toe had to be broken, and there were bandages on three of your fingers already. You were only half-way through your day, and it had the potential to get so much worse before it was over. You contemplated just hiding in a broom-closet until the day was done, but with your current luck, that’d probably just end with you giving yourself a concussion against a shelf or something, in the dark.

You’d taken a seat on a bench outside, hoping that the sun might help your body and mind back into some resemblance of coordination, while you ate. But, of course, that turned out to be a mistake, when the lack of a table meant that you had to hold your plastic lunch box in your lap, which (on a day like this) naturally meant that the damn thing did not remain in your lap. You didn’t even register how it managed to end up bottoms up on the ground by your feet, after just one little bite, and you were so done with this fucking day, you didn’t even care. You just wanted to sit there and cry and feel sorry for yourself until the sun set and this disaster of a day finally ended.

But you were sitting on a bench in a mini-park right outside your office-building, where people were constantly coming and going, and the last thing you wanted was for your co-workers to see you all pathetic like that. You weren’t exactly popular to begin with…

“Here, take this.”

Someone held out a wrapped item to you, and when you looked up you almost choked on your own spit, because the guy handing it to you was Marcus fucking Pike, the guy you’d had a crush on ever since you started at the office. The sweetest guy in the whole damn world – who had no idea you even existed.

“I saw your little accident there, and I figured you could use a pick-me-up.”

“You have no idea… thank you so much.”

You took the offered food and quickly dug into it before a frickin bird snatched it, or something. You’d expected him to walk off, but instead he sat down right next to you, to eat his own wrap, and suddenly you were nervous. You’d wanted to talk to him so many times, even imagined whole scenarios in your mind about how to strike up a conversation with him, each one more ludicrous than the next… And now here he was, and you couldn’t think of a single thing to say.

“By the state of your hands, I’m assuming today is one of those days?”

“You get them too?”

“Everyone does, just in varying degrees of severity.”

“Oh, I don’t have degrees, mine are always the worst they can be.”

“Sorry to hear that.”

Always so sweet…

“Thanks.”

You finished the rest of your meal in silence, and when you were done, he held a hand out for your trash.

“I’ll take it to the bin over there, save you from another thing that can go wrong.”

He winked at you, and scurried over there, dumping the trash before coming right back, with a bit of a mischievous grin on his face. He didn’t sit back down, but held a hand out to you instead.

“Come on.”

“What?”

“Let’s get out of here before anyone sees us.”

“You mean.. skip out on work? I can’t do that.”

“Sure you can, it’s easy. Just get up and walk away.”

“Pike…”

He just smiled wider, keeping his hand held out for you, and in a moment of pure insanity, you took it, letting him pull you to your feet and walk off with you. He led you away from the office buildings and busy streets, all the way to a promenade deck along the waterfront that you hadn’t even known was there before. And he kept holding your hand. Maybe it was just to keep you from falling every time you stumbled, but the way he held it felt like more than that. Unless that was just wishful thinking on your part. Ugh, more than likely. You tried to distract yourself by talking.

“So, do you skip work often?”

“Never have before.”

“No way. You must’ve done…”

“Nope.”

“But… then, why now?”

“Because you looked like you really needed it.”

That made you stop in your tracks, squeezing his hand a little harder and just staring at him in complete disbelief for a few seconds. He didn’t seem fazed at all.

“You bailed on work… for me? W-why would you do that?”

He bowed his head for a few beats, and when he looked up, he had a sheepish little grin on his lips, with that adorable dimple on full display.

“Because I like you. I always have, I just never… knew how to talk to you. You always turn away, keep to yourself, do the work and go home, not much chatter or frivolity. You just seem so… unavailable, I didn’t dare try in case you found it inappropriate.”

Holy hell… but he was too damn sweet.

“A.. are you serious, right now?”

“Very.”

You couldn’t believe this. A whole year you’d been working in the same office as this man, this adorable, kind, sassy, perfect fucking man, not realising that your own insecurity about talking to him was scaring him off.

“I always wanted to talk to you too, I just thought… or, rather convinced myself, that you didn’t even know who I was. I mean, why would you? Aside from being called to the same meetings occasionally, we rarely ever share the same space, and I don’t work directly on your cases.”

“Because you’re interesting. You don’t conform to the ‘normal’ office behaviour. You find ingenious little ways to break policies regarding your appearance, and your desk, so that you’ll feel comfortable in your own skin and space. And even though you mostly stay quiet, whenever you do speak, you’re always well informed and respectful, but also honest. You don’t let people walk all over you just because they think you’re an outsider.”

You had to actually tell yourself to breathe, because you were so shocked you just didn’t function properly right now.

“How do you know all that? When have you had time to notice me at all… I don’t… what am I missing here? I don’t understand any of this..”

He stepped closer. A lot closer, and you froze. He smelled wonderful, and up close like this, his eyes were mesmerising. Deep pools of chocolate beckoning for every ounce of your attention, which they eagerly got, while his free hand found your waist.

“You’re beautiful. That was the first thing I noticed about you. Not just your face, but your soul. Your person. And there’s a kind of grace to you, to the way you move and carry yourself, that I confess I may have spied a little on you in your office, in order to see better. It mostly only comes out when you think no one sees you. And I can see it even on days like these, when everything goes wrong for you.”

A warmth you’d never felt before, spread through your chest and abdomen, making you shiver in the most pleasant way imaginable, and he could see that too. His hand on your waist pulled you closer, while the other let go of your hand, so that he could wrap both arms around you.

“I’d really like to kiss you right now.”

Your knees damn near caved in on you, but this was too good for you to allow your body to screw it up, like it had the rest of the day. You wrapped your arms around his shoulders, letting one hand find it’s way to the back of his neck, gently tugging him towards you.

“Please do.”

As his warm, soft lips brushed against yours you thought to yourself that perhaps bad days had a purpose, after all. Perhaps they were meant to make the good moments clearer, more distinguished. After all, what was one good moment next to a hundred others, compared to one good moment, among a hundred bad ones?

THE END

#the mentalist #the mentalist fic #marcus pike #pedro pascal #pedro pascal one shot #marcus pike one shot #the mentalist one shot #i love you 3000 #i love you wifey #gn!reader

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