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#i can’t even imagine how picky some of y’all get to be
mylittleredgirl · 2 years
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the thing about cracking open a long-established popular ship tag on ao3 is that it allows you to be extraordinarily picky, and i think it must be the closest thing i will ever experience to being filthy rich. i scroll along at super speed like no today i am only interested in fics with this precise range of words and one of these three tags. only authors i’ve heard of, please. hmm, i suppose i could consider an unknown quantity given its apparent popularity with the people, but… no, no, this summary doesn’t do it for me. no particular reason, it’s just… eh, i don’t need to explain myself. bring me 50 more like this for me to choose from and we’ll see.
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aclowntiny · 7 months
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Fluff anon, here. Yay, I’m happy to be your first anon! I can’t tell you how happy and grateful I am that you’re not going to do smut or angst. I’ve had to unfollow some authors because they started out doing the fluffy fluff with maybe a pinch of spice (I’m not adverse to some spice), but then went down the smut hole or started doing super angsty angst that was frankly triggering on so manly levels. That can be other people’s bag of yippee, but it’s definitely not mine.
The fact that you write for ATEEZ, Seventeen, and Enhyphen makes me so giddy with happiness, I can’t control my giggles. Please keep doing what you’re doing (at your own pace, of course), and I hope you have a fantabulous day/night!
~ 🧸
“Yes! OMGoodness, YES!!! Please, please, please write for Stray Kids!!! 🙏🏼🙏🏼🙏🏼”
First of all I love the teddy emoji 🧸 so cute!!! 🥺 welcome Teddy!!! 💕
Same here, I really hate sad stuff unless it has an ok ending but to me I’m already very emotional & I don’t understand wanting to feel a negative emotion on purpose!!! Fiction is an escape from life’s BS not more heartbreak 💀😂 I don’t want to get rejected/dumped/worse in fic like I’ve experienced those things enough irl & moved past it 💁🏻‍♀️
& I’m picky about smut/not into a lot of tumblr’s kinks/a whole v card so I get that on the hardcore smut too! I’ve read some but quite a bit of it makes me uncomfortable & I don’t know how to write it 😅 I’ll only go for very suggestive here, like I have one coming up that involves that but doesn’t describe it & that’s enough for me lmao. Use you’re imagination y’all you get to do whatever you want before my writing takes over😂 there’s definitely some smut pieces on here I’ve really enjoyed, so no shade to those writers but it’s like the angst, just not my specialty! Plus in one of my biggest fandoms my bias is by far the least smutted so it’s hard to even find good works for him not me admitting I try
It makes me so happy to hear that things I make are making others happy too 🥰 it’s motivating to keep going & make more things that hopefully you’ll love!!! I got a couple takers on the Stray Kids works, so that’ll make its way into my drafts soon! Since I have a buffer, it may be in a while, but it’s just good to know some of y’all wanna read it! I love them hehe & have for a few years now!
Oh btw Teddy, who are your biases from each group if you have any? 😉
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Cast Reveal #3 - Tricell
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Please welcome the Tricell Tribe, named after a company allegedly against bioterrorism but secretly works in the shadow to sell biohazardous materials on the black market. The color is #005C7A
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Here is the cast: 
CLLIFTONE (29, He/Him)
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Hi guys! I’m a gamer and photographer from Charlotte, NC. I have a huge love for Survivor and Big Brother
Timezone: EST
Fun Fact: Portrait Photographer
Favorite Media: Dead Set. A show that combines my two favorite things, Big Brother and zombies. 
Favorite Food: Sesame Chicken
Expected Placement: 15th
~
ELS (16, Any - They/He/She)
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Hey guys!! My name is Els and I’m 16 (seventeen on the 8th of June!!) and I’m so excited to be playing with y’all! I love Theatre and debate and right now I’m actually working a kids theatre camp as a volunteer! I’m super excited to get to know everyone :)
Timezone: EST
Fun Fact: I don’t have a sense of smell (and it’s not even due to covid)!
Favorite Media: I have to go with almost any reality competition show (blown away, big flower fight, glow up)
Favorite Food: GRILLED CHEESE AND FRIES, pretty much makes up 75% of my diet anyways as a super picky vegetarian 
Expected Placement: 9 seems to be my (un)lucky number in ORGs so I’ll go with that! Although who knows, there are so many different variables that go into it
~
JULIA (67, She/Her)
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I am a Survivor show fan. I always imagined myself on the show but would need so many accommodations - electricity, a refrigerator, a soft bed or hammock at least and bottled water to name a few, and now, my rollator and / or a soft place to sit, so i never applied. I am a retired public policy researcher, but am a real life survivor of multiple hardships, so Im already a kick a-- winner, and i aint afraid of a few... raccoons!
Timezone: EST
Fun Fact: Fun fact about me!!! I can be snarky and flippant sometimes, and I have released two holiday ballads, a lifelong dream to produce and record some of my original songs
Favorite Media: I LOVE Science fiction - books, movies, Tom Cruise sy fy movies, old, new, Ellesium, Battlestar Gallactica, Dont Look Up...Into The Night, Eureka ...i could go on...
Favorite Food: Watermelon
Expected Placement: Between 1 and 5
~
MOTH (18, She/They)
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Hello! My name is Moth. I’m 18 years old and this is my… seventh org? I’ve played 7 times and never won so who knows what my actual skill level is. I do theatre, listen to podcasts and work at a beloved fried chicken restaurant. Can’t wait to meet y’all!
Timezone: MST
Fun Fact: I was in two productions in May: Theory of Relativity, performed at my school. and Working: A Musical, performed at one of my cities local theaters
Favorite Media: The Adventure Zone. (Both the graphic novels and the podcast)
Favorite Food: Salad. You can make anything into a salad with enough effort
Expected Placement: 7th. I think that’s about my average placement
~
NAVI (25, She/Her)
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Hello, I’m Navi. I’m 25 years old from Canada, and I work in broadcast communications. I haven’t really played an ORG like this before, so I don’t really know what to expect or how things will go per say, but I’m very excited to try it and out and see what it’s all about. Plus I like the Resident Evil theme to this season (I dunno are seasons a thing in ORGs?).
Timezone: CST
Fun Fact: This ORG is gonna be the first time I ever use Skype lmao.
Favorite Media: I really like the movie Whiplash.
Favorite Food: Dosa and sambar
Expected Placement: Maybe 17th or 16th? 
~
TONY (33, He/Him)
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Who can paste two thumbs-up emojis? 👍 This guy.👍 I'm a complete trivia nerd with a love of cheesy puns and one-liners. When I'm not neck-deep in spreadsheets from work, I'm looking out for new local restaurants or playing boardgames with friends. I like all things bitter - coffee, chocolate, whiskey, and the tears of my enemies. Looking forward to the game!
Timezone: CST
Fun Fact: I worked on a televised quiz show in college, writing questions and acting as behind-the-scenes judge.
Favorite Media: The Once and Future King by T. H. White
Favorite Food: Ice Cream
Expected Placement: 7
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sunshine-zenith · 3 years
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Okay but like. Ratatouille from Linguini’s perspective tho
You’re some broke, awkward guy in his twenties who can’t keep a job down to the point that you Know that the letter your recently dead mom wrote to her also dead famous friend’s coworker contains Something about giving you employment. So you march yourself down to this fancy restaurant, submit yourself to verbal whiplash, fork over what might’ve been the last thing your mother ever wrote, and become the lowly janitor
Fine, right? I mean, shitty day/week/month/whatever, but you aren’t picky. You have a job, so you can pay rent. Except you accidentally spill like half a pot of soup and you panic. You literally got this job like fifteen minutes ago and you already fucked up. Rent is breathing down your neck so you do the Broke Twenty Something thing where you try to use water to hide the difference, throw in some spices because you have no idea how cooking works, and hope that no one notices despite the fact that one sniff tells you you fucked it up worse.
Then a rat fixes it.
A random rat fixes it.
(You’re broke, you’re mom is dead, and you cook worse than a rat. Imagine that.)
And somehow the soup gets served to a food critic that’s apparently well respected and now you have no idea if you’re gonna be flayed alive by your new boss or given a job you are in no way qualified for. Rent is still a thing.
Then you realize the rat understands human language and knows enough body language to communicate. Then you realize you’re own body is fucking weird because this completely random rat (that you had to explain morality to because he stole some herbs from your neighbor) is controlling your limbs by tugging on your hair. Also you become lowkey famous yourself because the rat is that good a cook.
And you have to go along with it because you need money to eat and not be homeless and you need a job to get money. It hasn’t even been a week.
At least your coworkers are nice enough. You get a crush on one of them and get a crash course on cooking and working in a kitchen and sexism and oh my god like at least three of your coworkers are technically criminals aren’t they?? Also your boss gets you drunk and asks you a bunch of weird questions about pets. You only wanted a job
(The rat makes you kiss the coworker you kinda have a crush on that’s been teaching you everything. What the fuck. You probably have to explain consent to a rat now. Luckily the coworker likes you back and is okay with the kiss, but still. What the fuck)
(Also the rat now seems to have a rivalry with your new girlfriend. What the hell, rat buddy? You’re literally the reason these two are together, and also the girlfriend has been working in the food industry longer than the rat has been alive probably, she clearly knows her shit)
Suddenly, out of nowhere, the rat walks up to you with some documents about how your dead mom’s dead famous friend is your dad. Also your boss did DNA tests on you behind your back (invasive much??). Now you own an entire restaurant because of a deadline in you’re secret dead dad’s will that was like two days away from being moot.
(I dunno about y’all, but I’d need to sit down for like seventy years at this point because there’s like fifty different layers of fucked up here. You grew up without knowing your dad, then you learn you’ve been working at his restaurant. He’s famous and his face is on a bunch of frozen food dishes. Both of your parents are dead. Your mom never told you or your dad about the being related thing for some reason. Your boss did a DNA test on you. You own a restaurant and you can’t even cook. Your new pet rat somehow got this information before you and can apparently read. Your father was a famous chief, your name is literally a pasta, and you can’t even cook. It’s only been a couple months, what the hell)
Now you’re famous and the food critic they lowkey caused your secret dad’s death is after you because he has a weird vendetta going on, and also your rat (who’s like your best friend at this point let’s be real) is acting weirder than usual, but at least you have a better apartment and get to talk about how much you love your super cool and smart girlfriend in public.
Next thing you know, your rat is sneaking other rats into the kitchen, you have to explain that a rat can cook better than you, and everyone quits in the middle of the day (what the heck, one of them probably killed a guy and another was in the circus. The rat thing is weird but like. You can roll with the punches. Why can’t they??)
So while you’re like having a panic attack because of this, your rat unionized his rat friends and now the kitchen is being run by rats. What can you do? You wait tables because what the hell, you’re in way too deep at this point.
(Also, side note, Linguini totally missed out on his true calling as a professional roller skater or something. Dude’s graceless even when he isn’t being piloted by a rat, but on a set of roller skates he’s friggin amazing)
Luckily, your super smart (maybe ex?) girlfriend comes back (even if the whole rat thing is still throwing her off, but hey. It’s prolly nice to have Somebody acknowledge the weirdness of this entire thing without jumping ship). Apparently the food your rat cooks is so good that the food critic that lowkey killed your dad reevaluates his entire life, but now he wants to meet the person that made the meal. What do you do — your (maybe ex?) girlfriend is the only other human here, do you say she made it or do you show him the rat?
You decide to make this Super Important Super Harsh food critic wait hours, then you and your (probably) girlfriend have to show off how you’re weirdly drift compatible with a rat. The food critic just like. Thanks you for the meal and leaves. What do you do?
Also at some point during the night the rats kidnapped your weirdly invasive ex-boss and a health inspector. So yeah, you should probably deal with that.
Then the food critic that lowkey lead to your dad’s death writes this inspirational piece that critizes critics, tanking his own career in the process, only for the health inspector to shut down your dad’s restaurant. But okay, the now ex-food critic now takes the money he made shattering the dreams of other chiefs and invests in your rat best friend’s dreams, and now he’s kinda your friend and you work at the rat’s restaurant with your amazing girlfriend.
All this happened in only a few months. You just wanted a job.
Linguini’s a fucking champion for putting up with all this istg
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meowzfordayz · 2 years
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love language(s) — himejima gyomei
Author’s Note: my thumbs are not green. 🥀 Gyomei would be disappointed in me... can’t keep a plant to save my life. Actually: if my life were on the line, then prob would survive — my competency isn’t that horrid. Other than that drastic scenario, however... rip any plant placed under my care. 😵 
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love language(s) — himejima gyomei
Himejima Gyomei x Reader
Word Count: ~1,800
CW: mild sexual content
Request Fulfilled: hello hello! may i request some gyomei hcs :> like,, what would be his love language/s [giving and receiving] hehe thank you!!
~faqs~
Giving
Hold up
Physical touch
Quality time
Gift giving
Verbal affirmation
What’s the fifth love language again ?? Trying to recall from memory…
AHA!
Acts of service (should be “5.” but tumblr formatting’s picky af)
So I must confess that I haven’t read any KNY manga 😬
Which means my perception of Gyomei is from the miniscule amount of screentime he got in s2 plus any fanfics about him that I’ve read
That being said, I feel like Gyomei gravitates toward giving Quality Time and Verbal Affirmation
Altho the softie in me *technically* imagines all the Hashira as cuddle bugs (albeit some more highkey than others) I am not touch starved tyvm Okay maybe just a little 😕
Gyomei just strikes me as particularly simple
Not like, simple in the noggin 😶
Just
Simply spending time together
And constantly announcing how splendid you are
He’s not into flashy gimmicks *cough* Tengen *cough*
I see him as someone who deeply values his alone time
Mind you, being alone on missions is different from having undisturbed time to oneself, ya feel?
Not to mention: it’s gotta be, to some degree, mentally exhausting to be moved to tears all the time — even when the tears are happy ones
So like, this man needs loads of time to decompress
And prob seeks out lower stim environments when socializing 
At the very least, he’s gotta suffer from dry eyes
Have you ever cried so much that your eyes hurt?
Now imagining crying a lot
I presume eye drops exist in Demon Slayer?
If Shinobu can regrow Zenitsu’s limbs, then eye drops must be canon 😤 
Welp, Gyomei definitely has a vial of dry-eyes-be-gone on him 24/7
I’m getting sidetracked
Himejima Gyomei’s the guy who’d rather read a book in bed with a mug of herbal tea vs go out with the other Hashira for drinks 
And by other Hashira I’m thinking mostly Kyojuro, Sanemi, and Tengen (Mitsuri only goes when Shinobu does, and vice versa)
Initially, you’d be hesitant to encroach on his alone time
He’d never exactly uninvite you, but he didn’t necessarily invite you either
Until one day when you semi jokingly remark while returning from a joint mission, “Gyomei-san, are we even romantically involved? We hardly do anything together. Unless you count fighting demons?”
And suddenly, he’s inviting you to practically everything he used to do alone
Book in bed with a mug of herbal tea? He wants you there ✅ Begins stock piling your favorites
Morning meditation? Invitation sent ✅ Whether or not you wake up in time to join him is entirely up to you 😴
Watering his plants? ✅ Begs you to come along, which, you almost regret bc he has sooo many plants and it’s stiflingly humid in his greenhouse yes this man has a private greenhouse, author makes the rules and he takes foreeevvverrr to water them bc, “They each need 30 seconds of water, 3 times. Okay, [y/n]-san?” buuut he’s a cutie 🌻 so mostly you just feel honored that he trusts you to care for his plants
As much as he enjoys being deployed on missions with you, he does not consider fighting demons to be quality time 🙄
You lowkey wrecked him asking if y’all were “even romantically involved” bc ?? 😭 He adores you ?? 💖 Cherishes you ?? 💗 Loves you ?? 💝
You’d literally sent him in a tizzy
“What if [y/n]-san breaks up with me?” Oh wait 😐 They don’t even know whether we’re together
Dw, he wasn’t frustrated by you
Mostly just distraught at his own lack of recognition that you needed ✨attention✨
P.S. The morning after your fateful remark, you’d awoken to a letter slipped under your front doorstep inviting you most affectionately and hopefully to join Gyomei for an evening stroll 💌
Srsly tho
He has the time to water a bajillion plants on the daily
—Logistical plothole here what with frequently being away on missions: I’m aware 🙃
—But that’s what hiring gardeners is for 🤗
But the most important plant was wilting before his very own eyes and he didn’t fricking notice ?!?!
You’re his prettiest-flower-that-isn’t-a-flower
Ofc, he doesn’t douse you with water
He douses you with thoughtful compliments
Exhibit A: “The color of your haori truly highlights the gentleness of your eyes.”
Exhibit B: “Your fingers are so elegant plucking the dead leaves from my hostas. Thank you for pruning them with me.”
Exhibit C: “Your laughter is a butterfly’s wing against my cheek — so light and tender, and capable of granting me endless joy.”
He douses you with encouragement and pride
Exhibit A: “Thank you for cooking dinner [y/n]-san. You’re doing a wonderful job! I’m sure you won’t overcook the rice this time.” And if you do, then he’ll try his best to only cry a little, just for you
Exhibit B: “I’m so impressed you beheaded that demon before me, [y/n]-san! May I watch you train sometime? It’s been a while since we sparred, and I believe I could learn a thing or two from you.”
—He really didn’t let you have it
—No, really 😌
—It was all you baybee 🥳
—Okay so he might have accidentally absolutely unintentionally moved a tad slower than you so you could reach it first
Exhibit C: “I know it hurts, [y/n]-san, but I know you can handle it.” this will remain appropriate, unfortunately “A wayward sprain could never restrain your resilience and spirit.”
—He still cries as you hobble around adorably, then cries bc he just wants you to okay, and cries some more bc he gets to scoop you into his arms and tuck you into his bed — the injured must rest!
And most annoyingly significantly, he douses you in nonstop-when will it stop-plsmakeitstop-he really doesn’t have to continue feeling so guilty about it reassurance of your romantic involvation I don’t think “involvation” is a real word oops
Exhibit A; Random Day | Random Location | Random Time: “Do you know who my romantic partner is, [y/n]-san?” he smiles widely. You sigh. “You are, [y/n]-san! You are my romantic partner.”
Exhibit B; Random Day | Gyomei’s Greenhouse | Early Afternoon: “Do you know what romantic partners do, [y/n]-san?” he leans down and pecks the top of your head cheerfully. You groan. “They nurture nature together! And [y/n]-san — we nurture nature together!”
Exhibit C; Random Day | Gyomei’s Bed | Nightfall: “Do you know what the worst part about having a romantic partner is, [y/n]-san?” he murmurs softly, bookmarking his page as he angles his body to face yours. You lay your book aside as well, quietly placing your hands over his. “It’s knowing there could never be enough clothes, rope, string, anything, to escape the depth of your devotion to them,” he pauses, struggling to collect himself, “But that is also the best part. You are my partner, [y/n]-san, and I am devoted to you.”
Ahhhhh
Gyomei, devoted, to you
His time spent, on you
His words spoken, to you
What a gem 💎🥺
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Receiving
Time to give myself emotional whiplash transitioning from that bucket of fluff to another bucket of fluff
Imo, the language that screams GIMME the most for Gyomei
… as in, he’s screaming “GIMME” 😂
Is Physical Touch
Except he’s actually suuuper bashful about it
And never screams for it
—That’s his job
—To make you scream for it 😳
—That was an attempt at what I’d hoped would be a hilarious innuendo
—Guess not ☹️
It took you a while to figure him out
He doesn’t exactly shy from your touch
More like melts into it ☺️
But the only physical touch he’s naturally comfortable asking for is… 🥁🥁🥁
Holding hands 🤝
Beyond holding hands, Gyomei relies on you to lead the way
Creating a sort of catch 22, because you try your best to be cognizant and respectful of his upbringing
Which, his upbringing ≠ Physical Touch
Usually, you initiate touch in bed
Not like that
Yeesh
I already told you this will remain appropriate, unfortunately 👀
You initiate touch in bed, away from curious eyes, immersed in the soothing glow of cerulean and lavender lanterns — hand painted by you and Gyomei
Toasty, sweet aromas of sobacha and kuromamecha tea cling to his olive green kakebuton, a gift from you to him  “just because”
As the moon peers above the horizon, you’re tentative, knee leaning lightly into his thigh, your arm barely skimming his, the turning of pages floating pleasantly between you
Sitting in his bed, beside him, because he wants you there, is achingly meaningful
You move like honey as the moon ascends, a brush of your elbow against his ribcage here, a tap of your fingertip on his hip there
Not teasing, not seducing — easing him into your closeness
The pressure of your knee leaning on his thigh increases and increases, until he gently murmurs, “I’d feel very happy if our legs were fully touching.”
When the moon reaches and rests at its highest point, you press your mouth delicately to his shoulder
Gyomei’s focus wavers, book falling from his grip to his lap, a low, contented moan vibrating in his throat
“Another. Please. [y/n]-san. Touch…”
“Touch, Gyomei-san?” you smile tenderly
“Mm…” he doesn’t elaborate
Doesn’t have to
You have him figured out
“How does this feel?” your fingernails scratch faintly along his jawline Mm
“And this?” you playfully flick his ear Mm
“You’re warm, Gyomei-san,” your body adjusts itself Mm
Taut as you stretch to kiss the corner of his eye
Familiar as you exhale slowly, breath leaving a quiet trail of goosebumps from his cheek to his neck to the edge of his collarbone; your fingers wrap reassuringly around the strength of his wrist, lifting his palm to your nose; you nuzzle cutely, nipping at his callouses; then, you grip his hand with both of yours, his fingers straightening as you peep at him through them
“May I?” you whisper
Mm
You release his hand, sleepily settling further into bed, rolling onto your side
So casually, so safely, you tuck yourself into his sitting form, hugging his nearest forearm to your chest as you pull your knees up
—This is how you fall asleep, clinging to Gyomei
His heart hums, a constant, mellow bliss
As he picks up his book, and continues to read
Before you even ask-
Yes, he fumbles his book every so often
It’s hard to read with just one hand holding (the book) AND turning (the pages)
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mxsmwndr · 3 years
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ALL HONESTY I DIDN'T KNOW IF YOU WANTED PRE ZOM-Bz OR POST ZOM-Bz SO I DID BOTH LOL @theratunderthesea
PRE APOCALYPSE:
ETHAN'S LITTLE SISTER IS AMAZING AND SHE LOVES YOU!!!! Please let me have this because I'm in love with olderbrother!Ethan ok thx
Like lil sis will take your hand and drag you upstairs almost as soon as you step foot into the household
and Ethan gets JEALOUS but he refuses to show/acknowledge it because he loves his lil sis too much to be upset and it is precious
But basically you'll just spend the entire day upstairs with her on accident playing dress up and yea party and shit
Ethan pouts after, of course
But y'all quickly make up because he literally cannot stay mad at anyone especially you
And also his family loves you
And of course your fam loves him too
your dad/paternal figure tried so hard not too, but it was impossible because Ethan is literally PERFECT and had zero flaws and he’s so sweet and precious
But like back to school and all, you go to ALL of Ethan’s baseball games
Literally all of them, no exception
And if you can't make a game you'll make an excuse, like "I have a doctor's note, leT ME GO!!!" only to have teacher respond with "(Y/n) we've been over this, you cannot write yourself a pass to leave class early because you're 'Ethan's emotional support s/o'" "BUT MR/S TEACHERRRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!!!
Oh also you always run into his arms after his games
And OH MY GOD Ethan blushes a hella lot
And if you kiss his cheek his face turns cherry red so you make a habit of surprising him with cheek kisses because Ethan is ADORABLE and SHY and WAY TOO PURE
But don’t get me wrong, he blushes when you hug him too
So you do it randomly bc again, HE IS ADORABLE and soft and shy and aidjdjdjdj omg
And y’all have movie nights together!!!!
It’s freaking adorable
Y’all just kinda cuddle on the couch and share a blanket while watching movies together
Cause Ethan would much rather stay in than go out tbh
And you love it
But the only problem is that he always falls asleep
Like even during scary movies or super cool action packed movies
ALSO UNRELATED BUT HE FELL ASLEEP EATING ONCE because you thought he could stay awake if he's eating but noooooooo the next thing you know he's snoring with a chip laying on his chin
And you obv took a pic
But wearing Ethan’s sweatshirts?!
Omg
His sweatshirts are SO comfy
And they smell like him so it's even betterrrrrrrrrr
And also since he's like 60000 feet tall you practically drown in them no matter what your height is and it's adorable
Um... what else?
Oh!
Ethan can cook kind of good lol
His specialty is mac and cheese
But his favorite thing to do is binge eat junk food that he bought with you in his living room
Or yours — he really just wants to cuddle on a couch with you so he’s not too picky
But yeah, Ethan is precious and you love him with your entire being
OMG YOUR FIRST KISs??
Ethan was SO hesitant
He held your cheek and whispered “can I kiss you?”
And you were like FUCK YES
It was so innocent omg
But on the contrary i feel like Ethan secretly has a dirty mind lol
Like I can imagine him laughing at some hidden meaning silently and no one notices except you and you’re like “wtf man plz just be normal for like 5 seconds”
But yeah. Ethan is all cuddles and blushes
DURING APOCALYPSE:
Oh wow
Poor babe has so much guilt, even though he couldn't do anything to save them all (family, friends, teammates, etc…)
And you remind him of this, of course, but Ethan is going through a phase of self hatred and it's rough for everyone
You're the only one who knows about it though
And maybe Harry because tbh he probably picked up on it
But that's all. Harry doesn't say anything about it, too, because it's not his place and he knows it
Anyways
You like to sneak junk food to Ethan
His eyes light up and he looks like a kid on Christmas Day
It's too cute to not do
He likes to cuddle
Sometimes he gets nightmares and will silently show up at your classroom door
No words are exchanged then, but you motion for him to lay next to you and before you know it you're big spooning your baby boy and he's snoring softly
So you smile to yourself and whisper an "I love you, Ethan" before falling asleep yourself
And you don't know it but he smiles too
And whispers “I love you too”
And then he falls asleep AGAIN while thinking of how lucky he is to have you
So yeah
Also, he promises to make a home run for you, and you can't wait to be there to witness it
Also mocking him playfully
Because again, this boy blushes WAY too easily
Um... I think that's all? Basically it's just innocent and precious and you both love it, though it would def be easier without the whole apocalypse ordeal
POST APOCALYPSE:
Everything is kind of slowed down now
Like Ethan is still hella guilty for not saving his friends (bc now he has even more friends he failed to save) but at least he has you right
Yea no
You’re great and all but Ethan is just SO mad at himself ok
So you take him outside one day
And he’s like wtf but you’re like “teach me how to play baseball” bc he promised a while back when y’all stayed in that school together
And so he does
But he is still hella confused
And you’re not to great but that’s okay because Ethan is laughing and smiling and actually looks like he’s his age instead of older like he normally does
And so it’s a tradition to play baseball together when y’all have a break
But that doesn’t mean Ethan doesn’t have bad days
But you’re there for him, and that’s all that matters
Also there’s lots of freaking cuddles omg
And sleeping together? Like not sexually but just literally sleeping because Ethan is so warm all the time he’s like a heated blanket and pillow and everything you need/want
And y’all still sneak junk foods to each other but it’s mostly you so basically you still sneak junk foods to Ethan
And it’s all good
So you’ll do this a lot when Ethan’s not feeling his best
But yeah. Y’all are precious. Like each other’s light in the dark world you live in
And of course he makes that home run he promised lol
235 notes · View notes
elysianslove · 3 years
Note
hi !! i am in love w ur writing omg <33 can i req hcs of miya twins && suna w a crush who is in the girls ( or manager of the boys team if u only do gn!reader hcs ) vball team of inarizaki and they share the same bus or sumn when theyre traveling to another school ? thank u <3
hi hi hi!!! thank you so much <333 and i write fem!reader, hehe, so i made her part of the girls vbc! i hope you like these <3
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miya atsumu 
i firmly believe none of the hq boys would be picky about the girl they’re dating. like yeah they all say certain traits they want but when it really comes down to it and they are dating you, they won’t be upset if you don’t fit certain previous criteria of theirs 
that being said, tsumu would absolutely lose his shit if his girlfriend also happened to be a volleyball player like he’d be convinced it’s fate or something
like he wouldn’t crush on you because of volleyball, he just thought you were a really pretty girl he’d constantly see in the halls and stuff 
and listen! he really was planning on asking you out
except asking a girl out has never been so nerve-wracking. like he’s never, ever felt this nervous about it?? and he’d keep chickening out every time he saw you
fast forward to you guys having to travel to another prefecture for a game, and it just so happens that the boys’ basketball team also had a game out of town. between the teachers and coaches, they decided since both the boys and the girls’ volleyball teams were going to the same prefecture, you’d just take the bus and make due 
the bus isn’t small, but y’all are a lot, so it’s a bit of a mess when you’re climbing on 
somehow, someway, you find yourself sitting next to miya atsumu 
pls he will never stop talking about how you two were meant to be after omg 
imagine his shock when he looks up from his phone and he sees you sitting next to him his brain literally goes ???!!@#$#&^$#&%(&
you just smile at him sweetly and say, “i hope it’s okay that i sat here. there’s not really anywhere else.” 
he can’t really speak. no like he really can’t. he’s. starstruck? just completely gone. you’re just so pretty and now he gets to sit next to you for the entire ride? he’s thanking everything holy
samu smacks him on the head because he still hasn’t replied to you and you’re starting to look a little saddened 
“uh, yeah, yeah, s’fine, yeah.” i’m telling y’all he’s secretly a complete dork. 
at first he doesn’t really know what to say, he just knows that he really wants to talk to you, like badly, and finally his brain catches up to him and he asks you about volleyball. you two spend nearly the entire ride talking about the sport
his heart would not stop beating insanely fast the entire time 
so y’all arrive, and you’re about to head off to the girls’ gymnasium when he stops you. you’re kind confused but you don’t stop him bc !!! hello !!! attractive !!! and kind !!! and interesting !!!
and omg you don’t think you’ve ever seen miya atsumu flustered before, and apparently neither has his brother or his friends because they’re in the back just snickering to each other
and finally, he manages to ask, “do you like, wanna hang out? soon? tomorrow?” 
it makes you giggle how red his cheeks are 
the relief that floods him when you say yes is unbelievable 
he wishes you good luck with your game with a kiss on the cheek that shocks everyone because what a contrast to the person he was literally a minute ago 
just v briefly: y’all are THE couple. you know what i’m talking about right? imagine just him being at your games and cheering you on the loudest, kissing you fully on the mouth after disregarding any rules in place, or the opposite, of you cheering him on his games and just jumping at him even though he’s really sweaty and hugging him so tight with your legs wrapped around his waist
no please don’t think about going to the gym with tsumu, where he makes you cling onto shirtless him as he’s doing pull ups and you kiss him every time he lowers himself, or practicing volleyball with tsumu, where he’ll serve a ball onto your ass and have you chase him around the gymnasium until he lets you jump onto him and you both fall on the ground
and no! don’t you dare consider practicing serves with him and it being a competition until you’re both so spent and breathlessly lying on the cold ground next to each other or how proud he is every time he sees you finally achieve something you’ve been trying really hard to perfect —
good bye 🏃🏻‍♀️
miya osamu
okay different from atsumu, osamu knew you were a volleyball player, and he realized he had a crush on after watching you play once 
your gymnasium, the girls’, was up for inspection but you had a game against another school so you’d borrowed the boys’. the whole boys team decided to stay and watch and holy shit was he impressed. your team won by a landslide, and it was clear the rest of his team was also impressed by the way they were all speaking about you
after that, you kinda stood out to him more? like, before he wouldn’t really notice you, but now anytime you were around or he heard your name or you were mentioned or he heard your voice he would kind of perk up and his heart would beat a little fast 
he was like fuck 😃🔪
you didn’t really share classes with him so it wasn’t too difficult to avoid you until his little crush had wavered 
yeah until god himself seated you right across from him on the bus while both your teams were on their way to a different school. it’s not that there wasn’t a bus, the coaches were just lazy and decided to combine you both since you were headed the same way anyways 
the entire time he wouldn’t stop staring at you while you chatted with your friends and with some of the boys from his team. you just seemed so. magical. he hated it. why were you so perfect
atsumu was asleep for half the ride so he only made fun of him for the other half. it was v humiliating. 0/10
he thought he had been soooo slick lmfao 😹
he was not
samu’s generally a slick guy but. not right now he wasn’t. not with his crush he isn’t
so when everyone steps off the bus and he’s like stretching out his limbs from being seated for really long, he feels someone tap on his shoulder, so he spins around and sees you and honest to god his blood runs cold
you had a really sheepish smile on your face like you were ready to embarrass him and when you said, “hey i noticed you staring,” on god he wanted to die.
but then you noticed his pale face and quickly went, “no, no, i think it’s very flattering! and i’m hoping it means i get to take you out?” 
cue tsumu’s cheering in the back he is so obnoxious bhjdbcdbjc
samu’s mouth is moving but his brain isn’t really working he just likes to thank god that he said yes and didn’t say anything else 
this time, you wish him luck with a kiss on the cheek and he really hates how his entire body is just heating up right now so on the outside it looks like he’s not enjoying this in the least, but trust, his heart says others
that was the most nervous you’ve ever been but he doesn’t need to know that 
on the bus ride back he invites you to sit next to him in the back, and you’re both a little shy about it all but you make conversation and somehow it ends up with him telling you he loves to cook, which leads to the promise that he’ll cook for you one day
it’s a very sweet conversation where you’re both really excited but you’re also a little nervous about it all
again, briefly: if we’re going with you being a wing spiker like him, then training with samu is so fun. he loves to toss the balls up higher and higher knowing you can’t reach them, until one day you shock him and the ball goes smack on the other side of the court and damn he just fell in love all over again.
tsumu practices with you two sometimes and nine times out of ten he’ll make samu think he’s tossing to him then toss to you instead. 
you’d think he’d be quiet and calm while he watches you play? absolutely not he is the loudest. it’s okay you luv him <3
omgomgomg meeting up with samu after both your after school practices are over and you just walking home alone in the quiet and you’re both munching on some snacks and it’s so serene and your hand is in his and you’re swinging your arms playfully and it’s just so
sigh 
remember that promise he made to cook for you? every weekend without fail, since he usually wakes up before you, he makes you breakfast, leaves his home, and wakes you up with a little box of your favorites. the tradition never falters. every weekend you wake up to his beaming face with a steaming box of breakfast. husband material 
suna rinatarō
with suna, you two briefly knew each other
you shared class with him, and sat quite near him so you were like sort of acquainted with each other. i feel like suna’s not too big on speaking with strangers not because he’s introverted but because he just doesn’t wanna waste his time
he does speak to you from time to time though, mainly just to ask about class or homework or exams 
he didn’t know you were on the girl’s volleyball team though, so when you walked onto the bus, and he spotted you, he was really confused. when you spotted him back and waved at him with a bright smile his brain went uh oh
and then you walked closer to where he sat and his brain went UH OH
and then you asked to sit next to him because you’re all the girls are scattered everywhere and aside from them he’s the only one you know here so he just shrugs and goes yeah sure 
his brain is going uhohuhohuhoh repeatedly though he’s just exceptionally good at not showing it 
you don’t really talk as everyone settles down, each of you is busy looking down at your phones, but when the bus starts moving, suna takes out his headphones and 
he offers one to you 
vdhjsdshfkwhhesajkdhksf
ok im good 
you’re a little taken aback but you accept. the entire ride you two don’t talk, you just listen to music together, and occasionally he hands you his phone to choose a song, and somehow, in the middle of all this, your head fell on his shoulder and his head rested on yours and it was really comfortable and good god does he have a crush on you
when you take out your phone and open instagram/snapchat and start messing with the filters, taking snaps of him and making faces with him, and he gets to hear and feel your little laughs he realizes yeah, maybe he does have a tiny crush on you 
tiny 
minuscule
you skip away from him after stepping off the bus with a yell of good luck. he makes time after his game to go watch yours and he is thoroughly impressed by your skill. decides maybe it is not as minuscule as he thought.
the boys are on the bus before the girls, so when you walk in, he waves you over and points at his headphones, which makes you laugh a little and rush over to him. this time, he doesn’t wait for the bus to start moving before he hands you one earbud, and just like before, your head rests on his shoulder throughout 
middle of the ride, he opens the notes app, and types, ‘you’re really cute,’ while showing you the screen 
you take the phone from him and type back, ‘you’re really pretty.’ 
and then a conversation carries like this until he just straight up goes, ‘wanna go out with me?’ 
this time, you don’t take the phone from him. instead, you sit up a little, press a kiss to his cheek and whisper, “yes.” 
it only shocked him a little a lot
as soon as you’d said that, he relaxes a bit, and as you’re going to rest your head on his shoulder, he brings an arm around you, hugging you closer to him i am going to Scream
briefly: please, imagine just how encouraging it is for suna to see you in the stands at any of his games like it just gives him that necessary boost  and whenever he wins he just cups your face and kisses you so passionately yet serenely and there’s that small smile hidden in the kiss only you can feel and tell of
or just imagine you and suna relaxing after a long day of practice in a bath together or you completely drained snuggled in bed as you lazily and sleepily pillow talk 
or oh my god, suna coming before a game and helping you do your hair in a braid or anything that will keep it out of your face because he has a little sister and he’s just so good at it and all the girls are fawning over how he’s sitting on the bench with you kneeling between his legs and he’s just working diligently at your hair and once he’s done he just gives your head a little pat before leaning over and kissing your cheek like “all done babe good luck” 
or suna watching smugly as you absolutely destroy your opponents or if you ever play with the boys how you never go easy on them and he just 
heart eyes <3
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end note; im sobbing im this 🤏🏼 close to losing my mind why are they not REAL 
2K notes · View notes
changlix-mp4 · 3 years
Text
BANG CHRISTOPHER CHAN ♡ : A TO Z - ( NSFW )
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A = Aftercare (What they’re like after sex)
well , we all know how caring he is?
he is so dad , caring , like yea daddy ( sorry ksjsk )
ok for real ,
I think he is the type to wait a little bit , to let you both calm down , holding you into his arms
after cleaning you up
he’s gonna be soft with you
treat you right huh
little caresses and all
he is so affectionate , he’s so adorable ,, I want to hug him forever 
*crying session is open*
I definitively can see him wanting to cuddle you afterwards
he would lay his head on your chest at first , wanting you to play with his soft curly hair
NATURAL CURLY HAIRED CHAN SUPERIOR , BARE WITH ME
after awhile , he would put your head on his chest and his turn , he would play with your hair
holding you close with his hand on your waist until you both fall asleep
c u t e .
B = Body part (Their favourite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Well , before I start ,,
Chan said he loves his dimples when he smiles ,, well same
SO
I think Chan’s favourite body part are his dimples and his whole body? I mean I don’t really know, and I can’t really explain , but the fact that he works out and take care of his body ,,
he prob likes his arms aswell ( anyways , I do )
For his partner , he’d prob likes ,, oh no ,, loves your thighs , the skin so soft , smooth  ( so sexc sksj ) ,, he loves the fact that they’re not too slim and skinny . He also likes your plump lips , so kissable and soft and your tummy uwu
knowing Chan , I bet this boy loves every parts of your body
I know y’all don’t care , but
I love Chan’s veiny arms , his hands omfg choke me daddy , his cheeks , his hair , his smile omg, well … EVERYTHING ABOUT HIM ! His dimples are my weakness bye.
C = Cum (Anything to do with cum basically… I’m a disgusting person)
not the greatest taste?
but more liquidy and not sticky gross
so I-
I think it’s fine to swallow it?
he thinks it’s hot when you do this
but he’s not the type to want you to do things that make you uncomfortable
If you don’t want to swallow it , then don’t do it
If you want to , just do it
you’ll just make him moan at the sight before him
he likes loves to cum inside
it’s his fav place
when he doesn’t cum inside you
he would cum on your thighs ( because he loves them asf )
and your stomach too
but not on your face
you both find it gross so it’s a big no no
and it’s more embarrassing than sexy so , NO
D = Dirty Secret (Pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
chan is actually pretty open about his kinks?
he’s a dom ( we all know it jk )
act like he knows what he’s doing
but sometimes it’s not the case
actually there is one thing he’ll probably never admit
he acts like he wants to do all the job
the one who control
but daddy he wants to feel special sometimes
that’s why he f loves when you want to take control
he’d act like he doesn’t want to , but boy inside is burning with excitments & anticipation
I also think chan is the type to use your underwear when he jacks off
the thought of you in them, really turns him on
he’s just a bit ashamed to steal some panties of yours he loves a lot
ohh and he really wants to try fingering you in a public place
like in a restaurant? , library
He’s nervous about bringing it up tho. It’s a thought that he jacks off to sometimes
E = Experience (How experienced are they? Do they know what they’re doing?)
not really experienced.
chris is super hot , well build , really charming , polite and all
let’s just say perfect ( I’m not even exaggerating )
everyone want to get in his pants
but
I’m pretty sure chan is a virgin ,,
I mean , he prob just saw a few porns
my boy is really intelligent so
he just learn very fast skjsl
but yea ,,
and plus , he was a trainee since he was young , 14?
being under jyp had its own restrictions
and I don’t think he needed that and he had time for that
busy man *sigh*
F = Favourite Position (This goes without saying. will probably include a visual)
I don’t think he is very demanding
chan is someone very simple , understanding , he’s just not complicated
not someone hard to please
so I think ,
he enjoys the traditional one ( lmao ) missionary?
he also enjoys doggy style too
he can pulls on your hair to lift you up and have your back against his chest
in this position he can put his hand on your stomach and your neck to slighty squeeze it
AND
he loves when you ride him
boy gets harder than he was ,, as hard as a rock
is that possible??
this position makes him horny asf
he finds it f hot
he loves the fact that he can see your pretty face making yourself feels good
with this position he can see your face when you orgasm
he can easily kiss your neck , make hickeys
he can holds you and yea ,,
he can do a lot of things with this position ( hell yea )
but like I said chan is a super easy person to please
missionary is his fav one
he actually finds it very confortable for the both of you
very soft in a way and romantic
making love uwu
depends of the situation obv;)
G = Goofy (Are they more serious in the moment, or are they humorous, etc)
Chan is a goofy person
I mean is so giggly most of the time
ma babey!!!
he loves to tease , oh yea he does
he can be the type to laugh during sex , if you make a joke ( yea why not lmao )
if you’re uncomfortable , he’d try to make you feel better
so he’d try to make jokes ,if his first option of consolling you doesn’t work
if you guys feel like laughing , you’ll do
looking into your eyes and smiling at each other
c u t e
ngl he can get pretty serious
again , it depends of the mood
when he’s frustrated , angry , tired..
H = Hair (How well groomed are they, does the carpet match the drapes, etc.)
I’m pretty sure
he is not bare down there ,,
veeeryy well groomed
doesn’t shave it all off, simply trims, all nice and neat
the amount of hair isn’t too crazy
armpits shaved , he feels more confortable and clean
guys , this boy armpits is cleaner than my whole face tf
happy trail shaved since
TOO MUCH TUMMY FLASHES
but wants to keep his happy trail ,, maybe??
ughhh I want him to keep it bcs damn this is so hot
please hear me out daddy chris
i want to suck hug him
but honestly I feel like
he can go natural when he has the choice?
I = Intimacy (How are they during the moment, romantic aspect…)
he is so caring
so very romantic
he is a passionate man and he shows it through many ways
we all know it
ahhh I love this man sfm
but sometimes he can be rough
not too much but it depends of his mood
I mean he is daddy so sometimes he feels like he have to show his daddyness lmao i just cringed help me ughhh
he feels like he have to show his dominance sometimes
but when I say rough
it’s not something really wild x)
even when he’s rough
he controls himself
and make sure to check if you’re alright
tbh rough sex happends very very very rarely
but it makes it more special ,, x)
he cares a lot about you
i think he’s more into vanilla sex
yeaa I’m sure he is sooo into it
I mean c u t e
I mean I want him to make love to me!! lord forgive me
he is naturally sweet and adorable so
lord I’m so in love with this man <3
J = Jack Off (Masturbation headcanon)
he doesn’t do it often
only when he really is alone
especially if you are not around
when he’s really frustrated he also tends to jack off
and one of the reasons why he doesn’t really masturbate
it’s just because he’s constantly around the boys
and my boy is a really hardworking man
well , like I said before he doesn’t do it often
probably once or twice a week? Or not at all the week
it’s when he really needs some reliefs
K = Kink (One or more of their kinks)
chris is kinky , PERIOD .
y’all can’t deny it
• daddy kink for sure , no doubt ahah
he said it himself sooooo
he’s daddy material tho lmao
he gets turn on when he is being called daddy sometimes
if you call him daddy in public he will get a light boner for sure
guess what will happen next;)
BUT it’s not a need !
he doesn’t want to be called that every time you guys have sex
•maybe roleplay
teacher x student / doctor x patient or stuff like that ( I think he can prob play both, that boy is a switch )
I think he’s definitively not into hardcore bondage ( sorry ) but doesn’t mind to blindfold you
•edging : giving and receiving
he loves the way he can make you whine and scream when he’s overstimulating you
BUT that is only for pleasure and not for torture
•praise kink: giving and receiving
he thinks it’s somehow important
•biting kink : both giving and receiving
he likes feeling you bite down on his skin when he fucks you
he also loves it when you moan out for him as he nips at your skin
thinks hickeys are sexy ( and tf yes they are )
•so marking kink: giving and receiving ,,
it makes him horny when you give him hickeys out of nowhere
and he loves it when you do it while he makes love to you
but most of time he is the one giving them to you
loves leaving hickeys and little bruises on your hips , neck , collarbones , stomach and thighs ( your whole body should be decorated by his soft lips skjsk )
having hickies and love bites on his neck and collarbones
he loves his back being scratched
likes seeing the scraches on his back in the mirror
oh my gosh imagine what it looks like when he takes a shower ,, the water cascading over the red marks omg help me I’m-
since I think he likes thighs ( idk why but yea)
•THIGH RIDING is a big YES
his muscular thighs!!
he likes it when you wear strockings // it’s so fucking hot
•impreg kink tho it’s so sexy and cute damn <3
L = Location (Favourite places to do the do)
chan is not picky , he’s a simple guy
the bedroom is perfect
why? because it’s confortable
AND secure , intimate
it’s somehow warm and all
but the rest of the house is ok tho
kitchen ( but very rarely bcs you guys feel like it’s not very hygienic but it happens only when one of you are reaaaaaaaaaaaaaally horny and impatient)
living room : couch , carpet ,, shower sex is one of his fav
bath sex with chan is a concept
he’s not into public places
he wants thing to be confortable and intimate ,, that’s why he prefers doing it at home
Or maybe omg
s t u d i o
one of his fav for sure!!
he loves having sex with you in his studio ,, hot
having you riding him slowly
or cockwarming while he’s working ( arg stop me )
M = Motivation (What turns them on, gets them going)
kisses by his ears and down his neck
his ears seem to be really sensitive hehe
he really likes when you trace his veins with your fingertips ( it also turns you on , ugh it’s like i’m talking about me *moan * )
seeing you in his clothes really turns him on aswell
when you stroke his hair , like when you’re sitting on his lap and run your fingers through it , pulling at the strands a little ( goosebumps kskjs)
but ngl he can get turn on by you whatever you do lmaao
just smile , just breath , boy is turn on ( jk .. unless ahah)
N = NO (Something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
anything that involves bodily matter or fluids that are not sperm or vaginal fluid
he does not like degradation , it’s a big NO !
He would never ever degrade you! He likes and respect his girl too much to talk down to her ,, chan is a gentleman . He expects you to treat him the same btw
AH!! sharing you sexually . Don’t even think about it
things like threesomes and all, aren’t his thing
anything that involves violence too
O = Oral (Preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc)
he f loves it when you go down on him kissing him from his neck all along his collarbones , abs ,, running your hands on his torso
it pleases him to hit the back of your throat ,, but stay careful to not hurt you
he loves the sight of you inbetween his legs
he likes threading his fingers through your hair ,, pulling at it a little
but my man chan is one of the few blessings on this planet
he equally loves both : giving and receiving
he likes pleasuring you ,, looking at you from between your legs seeing you rolling your eyes in the back of your head , throwing your head back
seeing the way your eyesbrows frown , biting you lips
seeing how you clunch at the sheets , and pulling at his hair ,,making him moans at the sensation and at how sexy you look like
oof this is so sexy I want to disapear helpsk
P = Pace (Are they fast and rough? Slow and sensual? Etc.)
he can be rough y’know not really hard and fast but yea it depends of his mood
he is the one controlling the pace
even when you ride him , he’d place his hands on your waist/ hips to guild you
but I think he’s more into sensual things
he’d be slow and sensual
really slow when he wants to tease the sh^t out of you
he’d be gentle obv
y’know into vanilla sex
Idk why people think he seems to be into really rough things but I DON’T THINK it’s actually the case
my babie is so soft behind all those muscles uwuuuu
Q= Quickie ( Their opinions on quickies rather than proper sex and how often? )
No, quickies mainly have to be done in a risky area and that freaks him out so no
plus he hates feeling rushed.
he’s not the biggest fan but he def. won’t turn you down if you suggest it
he won’t push you away for sure
He finds it kinda hot because it mainly means you are needy for him.
Would rather have proper sex. He likes taking his time so quickies aren’t ideal.
On the very unlikely occasion he’d go for a quickie it would definitely have to be in a place he would never get caught
R= Risk (Are they game to experiment? Do they take risks?)
He is not that risky, he wouldn’t do anything to hurt you or to get caught in a sexual act
He has his own boundaries
He is prob open to try new things
he just needs to be convinced first but mainly just to tease you. He wants you to give him reasons
ngl i think he doesn’t know a lot of different kinks and stuffs so he is probably quite open for experimenting ,, curious boy
As long as none of them involve pure pain and violence he’s good.
S= Stamina (How many rounds can they go for? How long do they last?)
I don’t think I really need to write something for this one? He has a good stamina and can last a long time. I think he starts really slow at the beginning and then uses more force and speed after a while .
SO all night bcs of his crazy stamina , I mean he is pretty athletic so , but again DEPENDS of the day and mood
making love all night , taking his sweet time my fucking heart is beating so fast omgg
doesn’t get tired easily i think ; I mean boy can’t even fall asleep irl
BUT don’t get me wrong he can go for rounds but makes time to appreciate your presence and enjoy having conversations with you , y’know?
So prob tried to not go too crazy bcs he wants to spend time with you afterwards get me
If i have to say the numbers of rounds i’d say 3-5 rounds max . Again , it would depends on his mood and pace
T = Toy (Do they own toys? Do they use them? On a partner or themselves?)
Definitely NOT a toy user
he’s not into it at all
a vibrator is what he will use ONLY if you ask him to ( I think you must really insist if you want it )
he def prefers tease you with his fingers , cock but not objects
it’s skin against skin for him ,bye.
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
lmao we all know he is a fcking tease
sometimes , I think it comes to him naturally and it’s apart of his personality
he finds it so cute when you’re frustrated ,blushing and super shy ahah ( my body is burning just thinking about him teasing skjls)
V = Volume (How loud they are, what sounds they make)
L O U D.
I mean , please listen to 3RACHA songs , he’s pratically moaning ( that’s so sexy tho *moan*)
deep , or high pitched ( lord help me ) soft grunts
moans , groans , breathy moan ( does not scream that’s it )
please just imagine when he’s getting close and makes those sounds
( i’m the one horny rn , brb imma fix my problem lmao )
W = Wild Card (Get a random headcanon for the character of your choice)
he loves to hold your hand while you two are having sex ( uwu I’m so in love )
enjoys strip teases. Whether it’s giving or receiving ( lord , imagine him getting rid of his clothes slowly and looking straight into your eyes , biting his lips .. I’M NOT OKAY!!)
loves it when you hold his head while he gives you oral , pulling at his locks
fucking loves buying cute and sexy ( not vulgar ones) lingerie sets for you
not necessarily for sex , he just loves admiring the way you look in black or red lingeries ( or even pastel colors )
he just lives for the moments when you dress up for him , only for him
like knowing he’s the only one who sees
X = X-Ray (Let’s see what’s going on in those pants, picture or words)
long and thick. veiny
6-7 inches
( please i just took a ruler to look at the length , the way i moaned i’m-)
Y = Yearning (How high is their sex drive?)
normal?, average. 1-3 times a week
but he doesn’t need to have sex every week to stay satisfied
Z = ZZZ (… how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
depends on how long you two were having sex
of course after a proper after care.
but would rather hold you for a moment , talking with you , making you laugh and smile. It means a lot for him , want to enjoy the warmth of your bodies against each other.
c u d d l e  to sleep. uwu cute
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A/N : sorry I wrote a lot , it wasn’t supposed to be this long 😭 // FEEDBACKS ARE VERY WELCOMED ♡ taglist :@justamessofablog @mermaidshmari || since you guys asked to be tagged here you are lovelies 💕🥺 ||
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writing-in-april · 3 years
Text
Cinematic Coincidences
Spencer Reid x Gender Neutral Reader
(Spencer’s POV)- listen I just love his POV lol
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Summary: Spencer can’t bring himself to go on another date that’s been set up for him- so he stands his date up. Spence seemingly can’t catch a break and runs into the date he stood up.
A/N: Hey heyyy- here’s my seventh fic for my 30 fics in 30 days for April!! This one was requested by @andiebeaword (I added a reference for your love of hallmark movies in this hehe)- this is the original request- I tweaked the characters involved just a small bit lol I accidentally end up defaulting to using the people on the dream team lol- im going to start working in later characters in the show into some stuff in upcoming works (I’m also rewatching the later seasons so that’ll help get me inspired) Im always looking for feedback on my fics or really to talk about anything with my followers so feel free to drop into my inbox- here!! Thanks for reading- y’all have been so sweet 🥰 and hope y’all enjoy!!
Warnings: Insecure Spencer, Getting stood up for on a date, Morgan and Garcia (just the team in general) not really understanding Spencer fully, one tiny sexual innuendo- I think that’s it nothing too bad this time around
Main Masterlist Word Count: 2.4K
This was not what I wanted to be doing today. Garcia had once again inquired about my love life- along with Morgan of course, wanting to find out about all the juicy details. I didn’t know why they continued to ask when it was obvious that my love life was about as exciting as watching paint dry.
I gave my normal response to these types of inquiries, brushing them off without sounding too hurtful. Unfortunately Garcia would not be satiated by my response, apparently she was now fed up with my dull love life and felt like she needed to be personally involved. Garcia was very near and dear to me, just like Morgan, but I couldn’t deny that this grated my nerves.
“We’ll make you a dating profile too! Maybe you’ll find someone cute to date- or maybe get some?!” Garcia was chipper as usual, with her eyebrows wiggling at her suggestion that I should have a one night stand. All that I felt from her words was dread.
The dangers of online dating swirled in my mind and I tried to protest, it came out more like a stammer though. Morgan then patted me on the back and piped up, giving his own opinion, “Yeah- I think it’ll be good for you, pretty boy.”
Again I wanted to protest, beginning to stammer out another reason why I didn’t think it was a good idea. I sighed heavily when I was cut off again, by Morgan and Garcia already planning on what pictures they were going to upload of me. At least I knew that they had my best interests at heart, they wanted me to be happy with someone- or get some like Garcia had mentioned earlier. Still, it didn’t change the fact that there was no way I’d ever want to go willingly on a date with someone I had met on the internet.
—-
My thoughts had not changed since Morgan and Garcia had set up the dating profile for me. There hadn’t been any person I had been on a date with that had successfully been able to keep me interested beyond a few conversations.
“No luck with the online dating?” Morgan had teased when I had walked in with my head held low. This endeavor was just making me realize how picky and undesirable I was. Why couldn’t I just find someone pretty and be happy with it?
Morgan’s face twisted from a smile into a frown when I didn’t answer him, making my way silently to my desk.
For the rest of the day the team tiptoed around me, sensing my sadness. There was part of me that was angry at them for thinking that I couldn’t handle a few bad dates. But, they were right. I couldn’t handle the sting of rejection or the disappointment of a date that didn’t live up to my expectations.
Emily always seemed to know how to cheer me up, so I did attempt some small conversation in the break room while we were both getting our coffee. She never gave me any pity like the others who just flashed me sad looks, unwilling to make any effort to help- or like Garcia and Morgan, they helped in the wrong way even if their intentions were pure.
Her solution to my problem did make my ears perk up a bit, “Hey- I saw that you’ve been down and that it’s been about the online dating Morgan and Garcia made you get into.” I nodded my head in confirmation then gesturing for her to continue while I poured copious amounts of sugar into my drink. Emily opted for mostly cream instead of sugar, stirring her coffee a little, then continuing her thought,”I wondered how you would feel about being set up on a blind date. It’s someone I know so maybe that would make you feel better about going on it? Instead of having to deal with technology that I know you despise.”
Emily had a way of seeing exactly how I was feeling and not just spitting out facts without solutions like the others. Her solution made me nervous of course, there would probably never be a date that I wouldn’t be nervous for. However, this option made me feel a little bit more hopeful about my prospects in the dating pool. It was someone that she knew and trusted enough to suggest them as a potential match for a coworker. Emily didn’t trust easy, I could trust her judgment on this despite my nerves.
I gulped down a large sip of my overly sweetened coffee, collecting my thoughts before then answering, “Alright- I’ll go.”
The date that I was supposed to go on was at a quaint cafe near work. Emily had even made the effort to make sure that I had been there before so I might be more comfortable.
At first I had been extremely excited for the date, even going so far as to pick out my outfit. I would have worn my purple button up, that was the one I got the most compliments in. Emily had told me some stuff that my date was interested in so I made sure to brush up on my knowledge by reading about the topics. I had even called back to the restaurant menu in my mind, preparing myself by picking out what I wanted beforehand. On one of my dates set up through the dating app I had stumbled on my choice for food, making the person unnecessarily snappy. I had to cover all my bases to minimize potential awkwardness on my part.
Self doubt began to creep in after I had gotten fully dressed. I had gotten ready way too early in anticipation for the date, now sitting on my couch tapping my foot impatiently. I looked at my watch that sat over my long sleeves watching the clock tick closer and closed to when I was supposed to leave.
Biting my lip in worry, my mind couldn’t help but wander over into my self doubts. I couldn’t help but ask myself why anyone would want to date someone as tall and lanky as me- or why would someone want to go on a date with someone that couldn’t keep their mouth shut about random topics that no one cared about.
My self doubt swallowed any confidence that I had begun to build up in preparation for the date. I knew Emily would be furious with me tomorrow when I went into work, I didn’t want her to find out through her friend though. Deciding to get it over with I pulled out the phone I never used and texted her, telling her that I wasn’t coming. I told her to give my regrets to my date, who at this point was probably waiting patiently for me at the cafe. Sighing in defeat I then retreated into my bedroom again, crawling under my covers.
——
Emily hadn’t been furious with me- well that was a lie, at first she had stomped up to me the next morning to chew me out. She became more disappointed than anything when she found out my reasonings. She hadn’t mentioned anything about how the person I was supposed to be going on the blind date with felt. Not that I really wanted to hear about it, it would only make me feel worse. All I got from her was a small remark mumbled under her breath, “Idiots- the both of you…”
For the next few weeks I tried in vain to push thoughts of my failed blind date out of my head. I had avoided going in the general direction of the cafe. Luckily I took the metro everyday to work otherwise I’d have to drive by it every day, and I already hated driving.
I was at the bookstore for used booksjust around the corner from the cafe that was supposed to hold my date a few weeks ago. This was the closest I dared to go near it in a while. Since then I hadn’t been able to go there anymore, even though I loved the coffee there. Immense guilt had wormed its way into my brain when I had tried to order something there a week ago. All I had done was stammer at the cashier before bolting out of there, just another addition on the list of embarrassing things that I’ve done in my life.
I was flipping through an old edition of pride and prejudice out of boredom, there hadn’t been anything interesting stocked on the shelves since I had last been here. Then a voice piped up through the air that had a bit of dust flying through it,
“Excuse me, sir- if you’re still looking at that book would you mind if I looked at the ones on the shelf behind you?”
It took me a second before I realized the person was talking to me. I then removed my eyes from the book to blink up at them a few times, then registering what they had said to me and moved out of the way.
Their eyes were still glued to mine, the bookshelf behind me that they had wanted to look at forgotten. An awkward chuckle was all we both could seem to manage as we looked each other up and down. Emily had shown me a picture on her phone of my date so I would have been able to spot them at the restaurant. My cheeks flushed hard once I realized who was standing before me. There was no doubt who this was, the date I had stood up the night before.
Silence then fell between us and not the pleasant kind, it was most definitely awkward. I couldn’t imagine how they must have been feeling after I hadn’t shown up last night. They probably had sat
“Um- hi…” They spoke hesitantly, wringing their fingers in trepidation. My jaw opened and closed a few times, trying to come up with anything to say.
“Hi!” Was all I could manage to squeak out, plus a small wave in their direction.
They wrung their fingers a few more times, seemingly trying to come up with a response. I was surprised they hadn’t hit me with one of the books near them out of anger. It would be a normal response to being stood up for a date, the trepidation and silence just served to unnerve me further. Eventually they spoke again, saving me from anymore awkward silence which in my opinion was worse than awkward conversation, “Um- sorry for um, standing you up uh- a few weeks ago.”
That made my eyes bug out of my head- they had done the exact same thing as I had? Insecurity soon swept in, trying to tell me exactly why they had not shown up without hearing their side of the story. I looked down at the book I was holding, reading a few words for a moment of reprieve. Taking a deep breath I asked quietly, not admitting to my own faults yet, “W-why did you um- not go? If you don’t mind me asking…”
A deep sigh was what I got at first, one that obviously had a lot of stress in it. They then did provide me with an explanation, despite their obvious embarrassment, Well- It had nothing to do with you- a simple explanation would be saying it was my insecurity’s fault.”
Not that I would ever want anyone to feel insecure, but I would admit that them saying that did make my own stress melt away. They had not gone for almost the exact same reasons that me. I decided to be upfront, giving them my own reasoning- though I wasn’t even sure they realized that I hadn’t gone as well. “I don’t know if Emily told you, but I um- stood you up as well. It wasn’t because of anything bad! It was really for the same reason as you.”
They then broke out into giggles after they had processed my words for a second, which were much more relaxed than the awkward ones from before. I didn’t blame them, it was a pretty funny coincidence that we’d both stand each other up only to run into each other not knowing what we had done.
“I feel like we’re in one of those cheesy Hallmark movies right now…” Their comparison only confused me, I had no clue what they were talking about.
“What’s a Hallmark movie?” More giggles came from them at my questioning, though for once I didn’t feel like I was being laughed at. I felt like they were laughing at the whole situation, not at me specifically like so many people had often done. Also, I couldn’t help but admit to myself that their giggle was very cute.
Once their giggles had subsided a little they asked me something that almost no one would ask the person that had stood them up, “Maybe I could tell you over a coffee? If you want to of course- Emily told me about how much sugar you like in it.”
My interest was peaked, making me further regret having stood them up in the first place. Though I tried to push that thought out of the way considering we had both done the same thing. It was time to let that go so I could go on a date with them finally. Seeing them in person and being able to glimpse part of their personality made me want to know more.
“Alright- sure.” I set down the book I had been passively reading, now completely disinterested in it. There was something far more interesting in front of me now compared to a classic book I had read over ten times.
We both walked around the corner, to the cafe that we had originally had our date scheduled at. Conversation flowed easily between us, showing me that Emily had been totally right to set us up initially. Her words now made sense to me, we were both a couple of idiots.
We then got our coffee, which had been much smoother of a transaction compared to the last time I had been here. I took note of how much sugar and cream they liked, just in case we were going to do this again. Sitting down at the closest booth I then asked, “So tell me about Hallmark movies?”
Ask Me Anything
—-
Tag lists (Message me if you want to be added):
All works: @shotarosleftpinky @oreogutz @90spumkin @kyra-morningstar @s1utformgg @takeyourleap-of-faith 😡😡😡
All MGG characters: @muffin-cup @willowrose99
Spencer Reid/CM: @calm-and-doctor @destiny-tsukino @safertokiss @slutforthegubes @onlyhereforthefanfics @jareauswifey
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lovemeleo · 3 years
Text
O’Knutzy comes to babysit
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To say this was heavily requested would be an understatement! Not only is this the next part in my Asher Pascal series but O’Knutzy is babysitting! This took forever but I hope you all enjoy it! These OCs and their world belong to the always amazing @lumosinlove.
If you haven’t read the rest of the Asher Pascal series, here is the master list!
CW: mild injury and mention of blood (nosebleed)
_______________________________________
The week after they took Asher to practice was filled with the same question.
“Le? Where’s Le?”
After the seven days of it, Sirius and Remus finally broke. They called Leo, asking if he would want to stop over and see Asher.
Leo was of course excited from the minute they asked, “That sounds great but I’ve got an even better idea. Y’all don’t get to go out too often, why don’t you guys go out to dinner or something? I can stay in, watch Asher for the day or night or whatever.”
Raising an eyebrow, Sirius looked over at Remus before answering, “You sure you wanna do that, Nut? He’s moving like crazy now, getting into shit.”
“Yeah, I’m sure. I would really love to. Just tell me a day and I’ll be there.” 
Now today was finally the day. Asher had been running around all morning, a consistent chant of “Le Le Le” following wherever he went. Sirius and Remus had decided to spend the day out, doing dinner and a couple of the touristy stops nearby.
The doorbell rang around two and Asher was scooting his way down the stairs to the door. He still hadn’t mastered walking down the stairs, but he was getting there.
“Le Le Le!” Asher stood happily, waiting for one of his dad’s to open the door. He was excited but he knew better than to open the door without them.
Remus followed after, swinging the door open. He couldn’t help but laugh at the sight, “I should’ve known you’d all be coming.”
“We’re a package deal, Loops.” Logan said with a grin as Asher ran at Leo’s legs, staring up at him happily.
Leo swung him up onto his hip as they all made their way into the living room where Sirius was pulling on his jacket, “Ah, I see you brought backup?” He smiled, handing Remus his jacket.
“Eh, they would’ve gotten all whiny if I left them behind.” Leo shrugged, bouncing Asher as he wiggled happily in his arms.
Two identical sounds of offense came from next to him but Leo ignored them, pressing kisses all over the giggling baby’s face.
Remus smiled as he put on his own jacket, “There’s food in the fridge. I put a list of foods that he’s been liking on the fridge, but honestly your guess is as good as mine if he’ll actually like it at that moment. We’ve got Disney Plus and Netflix, he’s not really picky with shows. He’s got a toy box in the basement by the rink as well as in his room, but he’d honestly play with anything. Diapers are all next to the changing table upstairs. If you need us, you have our numbers. Any questions?”
“Nope, we’ve got this, Loops. No worries.” Finn said with a grin, making a silly face at Asher, making him giggle and hide his face in Leo’s chest.
Sirius smiled, “Alright guys. We’re gonna head out then. Last thing, try to watch your language. He’s picking up words like crazy so if we come back and he’s swearing, I’ll have you running laps before you can say Désolé, got it?”
The three boys nodded, knowing that the captain would never joke about laps.
Remus and Sirius both leaned over, pressing a kiss to Asher’s curls, “We love you, bub. Be good for the Cubs, Ash, alright? No crazy parties!”
“Yes party!” Asher shouted back, giggling wildly as his dads pressed kisses to his face.
“Have a good day, guys!” Remus said as Sirius pushed him out the door.
And then they were alone. With a whole child. Not just any child but the captain of their team’s child.
Asher looked up at Leo, a small pout forming on his face, “Buh-bye?”
Rubbing his hand along the little boy’s back, Leo nodded, “Yeah, they went buh-bye, but they’ll be back later. Did your daddies feed you though? You hungry?”
“‘Gettios!” Asher perked up in Leo’s arms, looking up at him excitedly as they walked to the kitchen. Logan pulled open the fridge, digging through until he found a large bowl filled with Spaghettios.
Asher cheered as soon as he saw the bowl, making the boys laugh. “Guess that’s the right one, Lo.” Finn said, sitting at the kitchen table as Logan made a small bowl up and heat it up in the microwave.
After settling Asher in his highchair, Leo sat down in the chair next to him, fixing a bib around his neck. Finn couldn’t help the happy sigh he let out. It’s just.. This was domestic as fuck. Like Asher obviously wasn’t their kid, but they were all taking care of him and Logan was making food and Leo was getting him all buckled in. One day.
Logan brought the bowl over, grabbing one of the baby spoons from the drawer, “Can he feed himself?” He asked, setting the bowl on the little highchair table.
Finn shrugged, “Give him the spoon and see.”
They all turned to Asher who stared right back, “”Gettios?” He asked, his hands moving towards the bowl.
Logan quickly held out the spoon to him, “Want the spoon, Ash?”
Asher grabbed it, “Frozen spoon!” he said excitedly as he began to eat. Most of it even made it into his mouth. Most of it.
“We’re gonna have to give him a bath.” Leo said, leaning into his hand as he watched Asher absolutely demolish the food.
Finn shrugged, “I can do it. Can’t be too hard.” Logan couldn’t help the loud laugh that he let out.
“Yeah because bathing a squirmy child is just the easiest thing.” 
As soon as Asher was finished, Leo got him unbuckled from the chair and handed him off to Finn, “Go on then. Let us know if you need any help.”
They heard Asher giggling all the way up the stairs as Finn took him up to the bathroom. Leo shook his head with a laugh as he wiped off the high chair.
“So how soaked do you think he’s going to be?” Logan asked as he wrapped his arms around Leo from behind.
Leo chuckled as he put the sponge back in the sink, “Oh, he’s definitely going to have to borrow some clothes from Loops.” He turned to press a kiss to Logan’s forehead before leading him into the living room.
They both flopped back onto the couch, letting out a breath.
“You’re good with him, mon soleil,” Logan murmured, reaching to intertwine his fingers with Leo’s. “Honestly so cute.”
Leo smiled softly, tracing over the older boy’s knuckles, “I like kids. Like they don’t judge you and they’re just so giggly and happy. It’s nice. They’re nice.”
A loud splash echoed from upstairs, followed by a happy squeal.
“Finn better not swear in front of him. I’m not doing laps because he can’t hold his tongue.” Logan glanced up the stairs to the noise.
The bathroom door creaked open, “Can someone get him some clothes? And also some clothes for me?” Finn yelled.
Leo laughed as he got up, “I called it. You wanna go grab Asher some clothes and I’ll get him some of Loops’ clothes.”
They met back at the bathroom, the door swinging open to Finn, completely soaked, and a grinning Asher in a cute hooded monster towel.
“Hi.” Asher said with a smile, his head resting on Finn’s chest.
Finn rolled his eyes fondly, “So I cleaned up the bathroom. Can you guys take him to get dressed so I can get dressed?” 
Reaching out, Logan smiled, “Yeah, I’ll take the little monster.” Asher cuddled up to him as soon as he was in Logan’s arms.
They took him out of the bathroom, getting Asher dressed in his own room. Logan tickled his belly as they got him into a clean diaper and then a clean pair of pjs.
Finn joined them not long after, hair still wet but in dry clothes, “I threw my clothes in their dryer. What’s the plan now?”
“Why don’t we go downstairs and Ash can show us his toys?” Leo suggested, looking over at the little boy.
A smile quickly formed on Asher’s face, showing the few teeth that had started growing in, “Okay! I show you.” Asher tapped on Logan’s chest until he was set down, and quickly ran to basement stairs.
The three of them were off to follow him, getting to the top just as he began his butt-scooting journey.
“Well, that’s fu- really adorable.” Finn caught himself, remembering Sirius’s warning about the swearing.
Logan chuckled, “Nice catch, mon rouge.” He said before following after Asher. By the time they made it down, Asher had already begun pulling various toys out of the box. 
Looking around the room, Finn let out a whistle. The entire basement was amazing. An entire rink, a giant TV in the corner with multiple consoles, and toys everywhere. He wondered how often Loops and Cap came down here to skate? He walked over to the short wall that wrapped around the rink, opening the small gate that blocked Asher from getting on. “This is wicked. Imagine having your own rink in your basement..”
Logan leaned over the wall, “I feel like Cap spends a lot of time down here. Honestly, Loops too.” He muttered.
“My daddies skate all the time. I skate too.” Asher explained as he pulled out of the last of his toys. 
Smiling, Finn watched as the toys were spread across the floor, “You skate too? Are you any good, Little Loops?”
Asher was up and heading towards the rink before they could blink, “I skate good.” He assured, grabbing the small pair of balance skates that sat next to the gate and pulled them on over his socks.
They watched as he stepped carefully onto the ice. His legs wobbled a bit as he moved his feet forward, sliding across the little rink. He was actually doing pretty well for a small child, and Finn said as such.
But Finn spoke too soon. 
After getting complimented, Asher turned to grin at Finn but he must’ve turned too quick. His left foot slipped back, making him flop face first into the ice. The basement was quiet as Asher pushed himself up, a stream of blood beginning to fall from his nose. As he saw it drop onto the ice, his eyes widened and he burst into tears, a loud wail cutting through the silence. 
Leo quickly jumped onto the ice, picking Asher up, “Go get a paper towel or something!” He said to the guys as he got Asher off the ice.
“I bleed!” Asher cried, his fingers gripped at Leo’s shirt. 
Finn quickly came back down the stairs, holding a washcloth, “Hey, look at you, bud. Getting your first hockey injury before you even get a pair of skates. You’ll be a pro before you know it!” He said, putting on a smile even though Leo could see he was freaked out. It appeared to be working though as Asher’s tears began to slow.
“I-I be a pro?” Asher mumbled as Finn wiped his face before carefully pinching his nose. They all had bloody noses before and knew what to do, but it was a bit different with a little kid.
Logan came down with new clothes for him to change into, since his current outfit had blood on it, as well as an ice pack. They all moved over to the cushy couch pushed into the corner of the room, Asher sitting in Leo’s lap. 
“Of course you’re gonna be a pro, Ash. You’re already skating so well.” Logan assured him as Finn kept his fingers pinched over his nose. 
Asher whimpered softly at the pressure on his sore nose, tears forming in his eyes again, “Ow, that’s ouch.” 
Finn winced, but kept the pressure, “I know, bud. But we’ve gotta keep it for a couple more minutes. Then maybe we can have some ice cream?”
He perked up a bit at the mention of ice cream, “I like ice cream.” Asher whispered, his eyes flickering between the three boys as if to make sure they were telling the truth. As if any of them could tell him no.
“Of course, little man. After we’re done, we’ll get you in your clean pjs and then have some ice cream.” Logan reassured him.
When they hit the 10 minute mark, Finn carefully removed his fingers and the washcloth. Luckily the bleeding had stopped. They all let out a quiet sigh of relief, but they were still going to have to explain to Sirius and Remus why their son’s face was bruised.
Logan and Leo carefully pulled off the dirty pjs, replacing them with a clean cozy pair as Finn threw the dirty clothes and washcloth into the wash.
He came back to Asher curled up on Leo’s lap, sniffling softly as Logan helped him hold the ice pack on his nose.
Asher perked up as he came back, “Ice cream, Finn? We have ice cream now?”
“Yeah, bub. Ice cream now.” Finn said with a smile.
They all made their way to the kitchen and sat at the table. Leo kept Asher on his lap, holding him close. Seeing him fall like that really freaked him out and he wasn’t about to let him go. 
Finn pulled a bowl out of the cabinet, setting it on the table. A small frown appeared on Asher’s face as he watched Finn put a small scoop of ice cream into the bowl.
“Where’s your bowls?” Asher asked quietly, holding the ice pack to his face.
Logan leaned into his hands as he watched Asher, “That’s your ice cream, bud.”
Asher shook his head, “No, I share. You too.”
Chuckling softly, Finn grabbed three more bowls and gave them all the same portion, “Alright, we’ll all have some, Ash.” The little boy wiggled happily, leaning back into Leo again.
“Now why don’t you let us help you eat this? That way you can keep holding your ice pack.” Leo offered as Finn placed the bowls out. 
Asher paused, looking between his ice cream and the ice pack before letting out a soft sigh, “Yeah, that’s good.”
They all enjoyed their ice cream, each of the boys taking a turn feeding Asher his. In between them giving him bites, he began dozing off on Leo’s chest.
“Looks like it’s time for bed.” Logan whispered, setting his spoon into his bowl. Leo looked out the window, surprised at how quickly the day had gone by. Sirius and Remus would be home soon. Finn collected the empty bowls, getting them into the dishwasher.
Asher sniffled softly, moving the ice pack from his face, “Nuh-Night time?” 
Carefully resting the small boy on his hip, Leo made his way up to his room, “Yeah, bub. Time for bed.” He pulled back the blankets in the crib, gently laying Asher down in the middle.
Asher let out a big yawn, wincing as the movement twinged his nose, “Night-night, Le. Love you.” He brought his hand to his mouth, blowing Leo a kiss.
Leo couldn’t hold back the giant smile that spread on his face as he blew a kiss right back, “Night, Ash. Love you too.” He murmured. There was a noise machine next to the night light, and Leo turned on both of them before heading back to the living room.
When he got back in, both of his boys were sprawled on the couch. “Who knew taking care of a kid was so hard?” Finn muttered, his head on Logan’s lap.
“Literally everyone knows that, sweetheart.” Leo said with a laugh, plopping into the empty spot on the couch before turning on the TV for some background noise.
Logan glanced at the TV before looking back at Leo, “We’re gonna have to tell Loops and Cap we broke their kid,”
Just as Finn was about to reply, the front door was opening.
“Well, the house is still standing so it couldn’t have been that bad.” Sirius said with a laugh as he tossed his keys on the table. 
Remus hung his jacket up, looking over the pile of boys on his couch, “You all have a good day? How was he?”
There was a pause before it erupted out of Logan, his eyes wide, “We broke him!”
Finn quickly smacked him in the arm, “Jesus, Lo. Why would you say it like that?” He exclaimed.
“You broke him?” Sirius asked, his eyebrows furrowed.
Leo let out a sigh, “We didn’t break him. He was showing us his skating skills downstairs, and slipped. Hit his face on the ice. He’s okay, his nose bled a bit but Finn bribed him with ice cream.” He explained.
There was a pause before Remus let out a laugh, “God, he’s got the worst balance. Did his face bruise this time?”
Logan’s eyebrows furrowed, “This time?”
Sirius nodded, “Oui, cette fois. He trips over his own feet, but he’s getting better. Or he was. Probably trying to show off for you guys.” Finn could feel Logan let out a sigh of relief.
“We told him he was a pro now because he got a hockey injury,” Leo said with a grin. “He just fell asleep like 15 minutes ago though.”
Sitting in the chair across from them, Remus smiled, “Well it sounds like an eventful day. W-Wait, are those my clothes, Finn?”
Finn looked down, blush spreading on his face, “Um yeah. Sorry, Loops. Ash decided that I also needed a bath? But I was still wearing my clothes… And Cap’s would’ve been way too big.” 
Sirius let out a laugh, “Love that you got stuck with bath duty, Harz. But really, thanks for watching him for us. It was nice to get out of the house without having to worry about keeping an eye on him. We really appreciate it. Did you guys wanna stay here? You all look beat.”
“Nah, thanks though, Cap. I think we’ll head home.” Leo said as he corralled his boys, handing them their jackets.
After they said their good-byes, the Cubs made their way out to the car and started to head home. It was quiet for a bit before Logan broke the silence.
“Well that effectively healed me of my baby fever.” 
Finn and Leo burst out laughing in the front seat, glancing back at him in the rearview, “No babies, mon chou?”
Humming softly, Logan leaned back into his seat, watching the smiles spread on his boys’ faces, “Maybe. Maybe one day.”
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feifood · 3 years
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Hiii, this is my first time requesting 👀 Is it possible for you to write some cuddling sessions hc with atsumu, sakusa, and tsukishima? No pressure, only if you're comfortable of course! 🥺
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Hey anon !! You’re so kind, thank you so much for requesting something <3
I’m only on season 4 part one so I’m still getting to know Atsumu and Sakusa, but I will try my best I promise :))
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Cuddling Session hehe
Atsumu:
Loves cuddling for the quietness
He can get very sensitive of noise sometimes, so there’s nothing better than the thought of a quiet cuddling session with his favorite person
You’d expect him to be big spoon from his extroverted personality but he’s actually little spoon most of the time
Cuddling is just his form of escape and he likes to be babied during it (as you can tell he can get VERY serious about this)
Still loves to conversate with you while cuddling of course
Enjoys being wrapped up in your embrace while he talks about how his day was
About practice, his last game, what he ate for breakfast, anything really
Cuddling sessions are either very chatty or not chatty at all no in between
PLAY WITH HIS HAIR he loves it
I also imagine him having the need the hold your hand while cuddling even though your bodies are already as close as they can get
Also is a big fan of you hiding your face in the crook of his neck
Makes him feel protective of you
Your scent just puts him in a trance (in a good way ofc !!)
ALSO is a big fan of kissing you at the top of your head
Sakusa:
Definitely did not like the idea of cuddling at first ...... till he met you that is
Touch has never been his thing (as we all know too well) but for some reason he couldn’t care less about the germs that he’s always trying to avoid when with you
He’s someone that naturally likes isolated moments like this, when y’all are away from big crowds of people
Usually a very calm person but his heart is racing at like 100 mph the entire time
You just have such a big affect on him 
Cuddling sessions are usually when he opens up and becomes vulnerable to you
It’s like a safe space where he feels like he can express himself
Tends to get corny sometimes during cuddling sessions
Cuddling just gets him in a mood! A very soft mood that is
You two almost always end up falling asleep, as for if he’s big spoon or little spoon, he’s not too picky about it
Both positions have their perks, as long as he’s close to you that’s really all he cares about
Will never admit to cuddling with you though, it’s not anyone else’s business
Also loves listening to you talk about whatever, he just loves the sound of your voice filling his mind
No thoughts, just you
Tsukishima:
If this cuddling session is taking place at his place his dino figurines are 100% gonna be staring right at you two asdjfhskdjf 
“Tsukki, they’re staring ...” and he would just roll his eyes
Big spoon most of the time 
Doesn’t really mind if he’s big spoon or middle spoon though, as long as you two are close together
Would try his hardest to not fall asleep first because he wants to feel your soft breathing while in his arms
Will absolutely kiss your forehead when you’re asleep
Due to his skinny figure, he doesn’t produce much body heat so a blanket will be necessary
He’s gonna have to take off his glasses if y’all are cuddling while lying down and you can’t help but admire his face
Cuddling sessions while sitting on the couch are his favorites though, like when you’re learning against him (practically sitting on him) under a shared blanket 
This man just needs blankets while cuddling
Once his brother walked in he was like HUH TSUKKI SHOWS AFFECTION?? 
Also LOVES to listen to music with you while cuddling 
It’s really one of the best ways for him to relieve stress
If he’s just been feeling really drained, there’s nothing better than holding you in his arms while you both slowly drift to sleep <3
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onlyhereforangst · 3 years
Text
WWR 
Ok y’all if you thought 18x05 was long, you in for a trip. Get ready for lots of caps, lots of not PG-13, and lots of overanalysis. I hope this lives up to the hype since it took me forever and a day (literally almost every minute of the 20 minutes of scenes took practically an hour to breakdown, I have a problem I know). Anyways, let’s get sweaty under the cut because the day ain’t young no more 👇🏼
Their bickering in the car but Nick smiling the whole time is a huge married vibe but also he’s so happy she’s alive and will take any shit she gives him vibe and I’m here for it. Pluuuuus Ellie avoiding nicks question about the phone call 😭 he’s so freaking concerned for her (he’s been through his own version of PTSD), his voice drops all the teasing and he actually opens up a little bit - really wants to make sure she’s ok. He needs to be there for her and ugh poor Ellie, those walls are going back up after that hug- a momentary lapse in her usual self. She’s so far outside of her comfort zone talking about feelings and weaknesses and she immediately deflects. Nick respecting that deflection is also huge growth for him, knows it’s not ok to push through like a person like him would normally do and force her hand. He knows she needs space but also clearly ready to be that ear to listen or shoulder to cry on whenever she needs it.
His joke about notable mustaches only to be the butt of the joke about using the word notable later is hiiiiiilarious. 
Her comment about Zillow 😂 um excuse me ellie you looking for houses and to settle down 👀 but then(!!) Nick pushes her down the stairs first when shots start, getting her out of harm’s way and putting himself in danger like he always does my heart 😩 like he’s still on the stairs by the time she’s in a cell “safe.” And side note damn they are good shots, oof. 
The toilet bowl scene is easily one of my favorites. Nick freaking out over Ellie moving hers and him not being able to had me DYING. Like legit cackling over his worry she’s suddenly way stronger than him 🤣🤣 and then he gets SO pissed they took their car hahaha like so mad he hugs the damn wall in frustration. But then he claims he’ll rip out the bars of the window (you know, to make up for not being able to move his toilet and still prove he’s macho) and Ellie’s comment about superhuman strength & his agreement LOL. His anxiety level of being trapped and more so Ellie being trapped is getting to him already. He is reaching for any possible way to get them (read: her) out of there safely it doesn’t matter that the plan sounds outrageous. Cue him moving back to pissed and breaking the toilet with his damn foot like 🥵 we get you strong Nick but no need to show off. Hot damn. His “I really think we’re stuck in here” after that IDK why but had be laughing again. I’m pretty sure I said “no shit Sherlock” at my TV watching live because thank you Captain Obvious. 
Aaaaaand then when she pauses and finds the bomb bricks but goes so quiet oooooof he’s on high alert. You can practically hear his heart pounding and then he goes and starts panicking slightly when she doesn’t respond with our first use of a first name, “Ellie we have a wall between us, what is it?” But his tone is so frantic and his eyes are darting around putting the whole picture together and my heart aches for him. He’s starting to realize just how helpless he is to save her. The exact thing he likely swore he’d set out to never let happen again (Ellie in danger) after last episode, is happening again. And this time, it’s not like he can go hunt the guys down, he’s quite literally stuck. Helpless with no way out. Aaand here’s where Nick starts to lose his patience. Pissed at himself for not saving her before, not being able to save her now. Pissed at everything. He cannot comprehend how she is in this situation AGAIN and he can do nothing. But oh lord, he doesn’t even realize it’s about to get worse...
Him brooding over this crappy situation in a corner and being the cautious one is so unlike him (but also so telling as to how unnerved he is by her being in danger once again and not wanting to do anything to make it worse) and Ellie calls him on being “so careful, cowboy” and hot damn again she really does like a man in uniform doesn’t she??? 👀🔥 and she not picky on the type of uniform either 😏 but Nick immediately deflects because he’s not *quite* ready to talk feelings so let’s get down to business about counting bullets BUT the second Ellie starts to worry again he goes into hyperdrive protective and caring boyfriend partner. Without hesitation he tells her they’re going to figure it out because goddamnit he HAS to figure this out for her. He can’t fail, again. And he’s so so SO worried about her & her mental health right now and I sincerely love it. I know Ellie doesn’t want to have that conversation but I stan (I can’t believe I’m using that word, I’m not hip enough for that word) an empathetic boyfriend who supports their significant other when facing mental health issues (like PTSD in Ellie’s case) ❤️❤️❤️ Nick breaks my heart, he wants to be there for her- wants to be the one she feels comfortable enough to open up to and he just gets so dejected when she rejects his probing again (but I don’t blame her, it’s *hard* to open up about these difficult topics), his body language slumped over the bars and tone is just so defeated even if he tries to snap back into his usual Torres self (newsflash it ain’t working bruv because she’s not totally wrong in calling you hovery). Yet naturally he gets annoyed because he JUST CARES ELLIE DAMMIT LET HIM CARE. Like you go through this entire list of him trying to protect you from everything that could go wrong because HE CARES. HE WAS TERRIFIED HE LOST YOU ELLIE. HE TRULY THOUGHT HE’D NEVER SEE YOU AGAIN. NEVER TOUCH YOU AGAIN. NEVER TELL YOU HE LOVES YOU. HE CARES. AND HE CANT LET ANYTHING HAPPEN TO YOU AGAIN. HE LITERALLY WANTS TO SAVE YOU (his own words because god damn this show plays with my emotions 😭😭) FROM ANYTHING AND EVERYTHING BECAUSE HE COULDN’T SAVE YOU FROM GETTING KIDNAPPED AND HAVING TO FIGHT YOUR WAY OUT OF A PLANE RIGGED TO BLOW. Ok done with yelling for now but man this part gets me. The implications are so important even over trivial stuff. He felt helpless and Nick Torres cannot do helpless, so he tries do to everything else in his power to keep her away from any danger no matter how little it seems. Even hot coffee is too much for his precious babe and while he knows she’s not some delicate, fragile flower- he knows she can hold her own (& has called her a badass as proof), his heart can’t possibly take another explosion on an airstrip. Even if that airstrip is something like a burnt tongue. Ok I die now 😩😩😩
But let’s come back to living because this bullshit Nick “I always tell you what’s going on with me...you ask I tell you” exCUSE ME. Is this the same man who claimed he was being overprotective and that Ellie was like a sister to him?!???!! Yeah, I call bullSHIT that you tell Ellie what’s going on with you. (And Ellie calls BS too, btw buddy). 
But when Ellie finally decides to open a little I love it. I think she finally understood at least just a bit that he just, simply cares about her & her well-being. So she gives him a tiny taste of what she’s going through. And god Nick’s face when he understands the gravity of what she’s having to face mentally. Like I know he knew but I don’t think he knew just how bad. And you can just see that hatred towards his perceived failure turning inward once again as the mood shifts in these cells to somber. Plus Ellies last comment here with them *needing* to find a way out of there- girrrrrrrl poor baby girl 😭 she’s struggling so hard right now and trying so hard to not let it show and not let it get to her but you know she’s terrified. You know she’s desperately triggered. UGH Ellie 💔💔
We cut to Ellie desperately trying to figure out a solution to getting the fuck outta there and once again my heart aches for her triggered self. Nick seems desolate and frustrated, shutting down slowly as it seems less and less likely they’ll get out. Buuuuut then the GUM. Ahahahahahah Ellieeeeeee how do you know about that last piece of gum for “breath emergencies”??? AHHHH this man’s jeans are so damn tight (& yes trust me I would know, I observe) but like also you staring at a spot on said tight jeans that’s only maybe five inches from a different outline 👀👀👀 GIRL I FEEL YOUUUU. GET. IT. Plus she knows exactly what he calls it and I freaking love that. His excuse for why he has to save it is also hilarious 🤣 his breath emergency later hmmm doubt you wanted to save it to MacGyver something Nick sooooo you got another thing in mind?? 😏 and then LMAO it’s mushy because his pants are sweaty I’m rolllllling. Your pants too tight Nick? (this is not humanly possible btw) ALSO is this why later Ellie says she expected Nick to be more sweaty??? If it is and now rewatching I kind of feel like it is, omg what a great callback on her part 🤣🤣
Nick trying to coach her on the proper way of opening the cell door is hilarious because bitch which one of you was able to move their toilet Nick 👀😂 but oh damn now it’s when shit goes downhill fast. 
Nick not being able to see anything and his frantic questioning is amazing compared to Ellies absolute panic realizing she is once again facing down a bomb. I feel like her calming breaths are a coping technique Jack has been helping her with but man kill me now, Nick’s face?? When he realizes what he thought was helplessness earlier has just shot yo exponentially??? Oof with a capital O. This poor man needs a damn drink and yet all he can have is a club soda boy I *feel you* on that (side note #letsgetthisbabyoutmybellyasap). His woman has gone and gotten herself into another bomb encounter for the second time in a week. And he CANT DO A DAMN THING ABOUT IT. Can you imagine the absolute inner (and outer, give it a sec) freak out he’s having?? He wants to save her from hot coffee for Christ’s sake and now he can’t save her from a rigged bomb. Talk about a shitty situation. 
I just love the Torres Teachable Moment little discussion. Like Nick’s smirk gets me. I really don’t think he knew she had a name for it or realized that she caught on to what he was doing (trying to help her grow as an agent without being obvious or “degrading”). And then we move on to comparing arm length and I crack up 😂 “my arms are longer than yours” and “no they’re disproportionately short for your body” HAHAHA like what the hell have you guys been doing to know this?? Do you stand *that* close together with your arms down to know their lengths comparatively and how much do you stare at Nick, Ellie? Daaaaaaamn. From his gum to his arms to his body I see you 👀 I’m not hating tho I would too 😏 I think what I loved most about this whole jail scene (aside the ending obvs) is the quick flipping back and  forth from joking & teasing to dead serious & worried. Like they’re both trying so hard to keep it above board and light- trying desperately not to think of the implications of what’s happening but then (usually Nick) those intrusive thoughts sneak through and he can’t help but redirect them back to serious. It shows their inner warrings with themselves and just how hard this is for both of them. How much they want to appear strong and unflappable but they both know deep down the whole situation is eating away at them. And Nick bringing up her standing on a bomb only moments before he tells her he’s going to shoot the wall- OOF. Ellie’s genuine terror for him injuring himself and her then not being able to do a damn thing about it because she’s standing on a FREAKING BOMB is so painful to watch. Like she’s stuttering she can’t get it out fast enough, she needs to stop him, she can’t fathom him getting hurt while she’s helpless (uh, hello there theme of the episode how have you been). Nick’s facial expressions through this scene are also so telling. He goes from “this isn’t a big deal” to “oh shit she’s panicking” to “holy shit is she going to open up, is she really talking about this” to “fuck it’s my fault she had to go through that and it’s tearing me up inside every second” to “hooooooly fuck is she about to say what I think she’s about to say?? Is she about to confirm what I know deep inside but am too afraid to say aloud?? Is it true??” And ELLIE OH ELLIE. Reliving that *has* to be hard, has to. To finally bring it up after she’s been dodging it all damn day...you know the thought of him getting seriously injured had her more than rattled. And she cracks open those cement walls around her heart so briefly, the glimpse in it provides I think a turning point for Nick. Finally seeing that it’s not just him, she’s in deep too. Even if she can’t say it, can’t say she was fighting to see him again 😩💔 he knows. She says he only has one bullet left and to save it and they’ll figure some other way with tears in her eyes my HEART. But Nick gets it. Nick gets it because he’s been in the exact same situation. His eyes as they process the implication of her words and the fear for his life running through them 🥺 his simple “ok” is so unlike his normal self, you just know he’s once again doing anything and everything he can for. Even if that means standing down and not fighting for his way (the natural instinct for him). He knows what she needs is reassurance he won’t accidentally shoot himself. So he does it 😭 But him pacing (as a man of action suddenly faced with forced inaction) & Ellie begging for an inventory over and over (a woman of logics and data faced with PTSD) is so painful. You can tell they’re both struggling and neither wants to admit it but also they both need to do something - for Nick that becomes finally deciding to shoot a foothold in the wall and for Ellie that meant trying to go over their facts again and again but suddenly she’s once again terrified Nick is going to injure himself. The one man she fought to see again might hurt or even kill himself and she can’t do a damn thing because she’s standing on a bomb for fuck’s sake. Aaaaaaand cue the blow up. Cue Nick voicing his worst fears of Ellie accidentally triggering the bomb. Cue Ellie getting defensive because she’s so damn used to be babied and treated like she can’t take care of herself. Cue the “overprotective hovery man crap” line that had me rolling on the floor (tbt ROFL). Cue Ellie calling herself a girl but Nick calling her a woman like DAMN get me where it hurts Nick- that right there is a man who respects the living hell out of this fiiiiiiine representation of a woman in front of him 🔥. Cue Ellie saying because I’m “me” like um FUCK YES IT’S BECAUSE YOU’RE YOU AND HE’S TOO SCARED OF LOSING YOU ELLIE. Cue Nick finally losing his shit and getting reeeeeealllllllll like hallelujah do you hear the church bells?! Even Ellie knows to finally pause and listen. Nick never loses it on her, never. She knows this shift is serious and it’s happening. And omg his confession can I just have a moment of silence for the GROWTH.
Thank you, it needed commemorating. The same Nick who didn’t belong to a team is the Nick that is out here claiming he can’t sit idly by while the love of his life might get blown up again. He’s NOT OKAY WITH THAT AND NEITHER AM I. NOT AFTER THIS GODDAMN SCENE. His head bob accentuating just- how- important this is to him is so in character (thank you Wilmer) and theeeeeeen shoot me the way he has to fucking collect himself from almost crying. The emotion- there just aren’t words. Literally he has to look up to the sky and blink back those tears you know are threatening to fall at the thought of the woman who he still *technically* hasn’t told that he loves her could potentially die, again, for the second time in a week. So guess the hell what? He’s telling her (sort of). He’s telling her he would do anything, anything, put himself in danger’s way if it meant there was even the tiniest chance it would save her. Pardon the callback but- HE WOULD RISK HIS LIFE TO SAVE HERS. DON’T YOU REMEMBER ELLIE. YOU SAID I KNOW. DO YOU KNOW NOW. DO YOU. BECAUSE GOOD LORD CAN YOU MARRY THIS MAN ALREADY BEFORE I DIVORCE MY HUSBAND AND DO IT (jk love you honey 😘). But like damn, she knows it now. That look- she bites her lip and has tears in her own eyes at the realness she can feel even through a cement block wall. It’s a feeling she’s not used to. She isn’t used to being a person someone would literally risk death for. She doesn’t think she deserves it (sip on that like whiskey, mull it over, let it sink in & cry about it). Even if she knows she doesn’t need saving (and so does Nick), she finally realizes it isn’t about that. It isn’t about he feels like she can’t do it. It’s about the overwhelming pull that your life isn’t greater than the one you love. That love, real true love, is knowing you would do anything for that other person (and they the same) because the world would be worse off without them in it. And Nick will never be okay with a world without Ellie. Never. Their joint quiet after his confession is so powerful. There’s no claims of falsehood, there’s no trying to quip back at him, there’s no trying to stop him. It just settles into the room- into their hearts. They’ve crossed a line and it means so, so much. Nick can feel a weight lifted off his shoulders as he loads his gun and gets ready and Ellie can feel a weight settle on hers from the need to reciprocate. And not out of pity, it would be out of truth. But she knows it isn’t the right time. She knows she has to do it, and she will. She held back earlier when she couldn’t say she was fighting for Nick, but his outburst and confession gave her the courage in this scene. She finally has confirmation she means to him like he means to her. And she has to know, she has to know if he means it or if it was heat of the moment so when the dust settles she inquires, “what’s going on over there?” A pulse check. A way of asking without asking—did you mean that? And the shock of confirmation of her face as Nick, dead as a doornail serious says, “close calls make you live harder”….holy hell. That’s the moment it snaps for her, everything snaps into place—the agony he’s gone through not only this week, but the past couple years of close calls. He’s done beating around the bush, he’s living harder, he’s going all in, he’s getting what he wants. He refuses to let anything like a damn jail cell rigged to blow stand in his way. And she knows, she knows just how important she is to him. He might not have said those three words, but that phrase- that phrase was a direct window into Nick Torres’ soul. And by god I love it. 
But Nick pulling a prank on Ellie like that is also so Nick- the little shit. The genuine concern in her voice when she yells his name 😭 like dude, her worst fear, something causing ongoing trauma in her head right now is the ONE THING you decide to tease her with??? I should expect nothing less but damn that’s low 😂 her checking on his status update with Gibbs though feels like such a role reversal from earlier and it cracks me up, side note. 
When they’re getting ready to stand down the returning brother and Nick gets in position next to the wall but can’t even look ahead- he’s just staring at Ellie, oof. In that moment he’s brutally and painfully aware she can’t hide for cover. Not only can she not hide, he can’t cover her because he’s (locked in a cell but also) out of bullets. He’s once again near helpless and the woman he loves (and has now finally kind of told) is a sitting duck. Someone get this poor man a damn club soda, I repeat. 
And the little talk between the two parties- I love that Ellie takes point. Love that Nick lets her. Like damn that’s a supportive partner right there and I 👏🏼 AM 👏🏼 HERE 👏🏼 FOR 👏🏼 IT. He knows she can handle this shit and he will willingly let her. But nooooooowwwww weee gettinggggg to the goooooood paaaaaaart. 
Ok first, “good to see you” - this man has missed her face. Straight up dying to see her in the flesh. Just listening to her voice and not seeing the emotions written on her face is not enough. Seeing her alive, smiling at him, he needed it. But of course, let’s keep it light, act natural Nicholas. 
“I thought you’d be sweatier” - excUUUUSE ME ELLIE. Not only did you just call out his reference to his sweaty jeans earlier, you also WANT TO SEE HIM SWEATY DON’T YOU. THAT SMIRK SAYS YES DON’T LIE. And honestly, I don’t blame you shhhhh.
“The day is young” - can I get another excUUUUSE ME NICK. Words- they don’t- function. Because that knowing smile of hers- SHE’S OKAY WITH IT. GET YOUR MIND OUT THE GUTTER YOU TWO THERE’S A HOMICIDAL MAN UPSTAIRS. YOU’VE GOT TIME TO GET SWEATY TOGETHER TONIGHT YOU HEAR ME. THAT DAY IS YOUNG AND SO ARE YOU SO GET THOSE BRICKS AND THEN YOU CAN GET TO BANGING LATER. I just fucking can’t with their smirks. I can’t. This isn’t the normal banter, this is the fuck me banter and I’m okay with it. Because right after the I-wanna-get-in-your-sweaty-jeans banter we have Ellie putting her HAND ON HIS GD HIP AS HE PASSES ONLY TO MOVE UP TO BOTH SHOULDERS. AND THEEEEEEEN HOLY HELL SOMEONE LIGHT A MATCH BECAUSE THIS BITCH ABOUT TO EXPLODE FROM SEXUAL TENSION. Is it possible to rewatch this scene a thousand times in slo-mo and still not have watched it enough? Because that is me. That will always be me. How are they so in tandem, so in sync as they look up mere inches from each other- directly into the other’s eyes knowing exactly how serious this situation is and yet pausing to freaking gaze longingly (read: have eye sex) at each other. And I’m sorry Nick looks down at her lips like three times??? For a good while too?? Sir nothing you said required you to look there. nothing. And also there’s no way his hands aren’t on her I thiiiiiiink they’re on her upper arms (based on the last shot as he’s walking to get the bricks) but like hold her tight Nick please. Also while Ellie doesn’t look at his lips (in this scene) holy shit those are some come-hither eyes if I’ve ever seen them. “I’m sure” ABOUT YOU. SHE’S SURE ABOUT YOU NICK. SHE’S SURE SHE’S READY TO GET SWEATY WITH YOU NICK. Like literally, this girl had been leaning up against the cement wall for a looooong time before he has to pass her and now, NOW that Nick has to pass her- SHE STANDS UP TALL. TO GIVE HIM NO SPACE. WHILE SHE’S STANDING ON A BOMB. BITCH YOU WANTED IT. That was a damn power move Ellie and I am not mad about it. She so easily could have leaned back, given him a ton of space to get around, but nooooooo she stands right there, middle of the tight opening and says yes Nick come get 1mm from my face, touch me here, touch me there, touch me everywhere don’t care 👀 while you pass. I’m sure I’m okay with it because you’ve just eye fucked me and it’s exactly what I wanted. And I mean come oooooooon just the underlying emotion behind both of their words. Nick isn’t just asking if she won’t move her foot- it’s his way of asking if she’s ok and she looks SO much better, more relaxed now that he’s with her. The tense, anxiety-ridden Ellie that was asking for inventory or snapping about him being overprotective, is now at ease despite still standing on said bomb- all because Nick is right there with her and if that doesn’t make you 🥺😭 I don’t know what will. Like she can’t even take her eyes off of him even after rude brother interrupts this gold moment of theirs until Nick has already completely turned his head towards the dude. She’s just so relieved to see him standing there, so close to her, feeling his warmth underneath her hands again. 
Side note to prove my earlier point, when Nick casually reaches through to throw the bags of bricks through the door Ellie is leaning on the wall and THERE’S SO MUCH ROOM. HE COULD HAVE EASILY PASSED. 
Nick looks like he literally wants to murder the guy, enraged that he’s the one who put Ellie in this situation again. We would’ve seen swan!Nick if it wasn’t for Ellie choosing this moment to finally share her feelings. Because remember- she’d decided she was going to reciprocate but knew it wouldn’t come off the right way before. Now’s the time. Now when the immediate threat to their lives is gone (excluding bomb of course). Now when they’re alone, they’re together, and she can look him in the eye so he knows she’s serious. He can read the truth in her eyes rather than doubt her words said across a jail cell wall. 
“This isn’t about me, it’s about you” - well damn that got your attention didn’t it Nick??? So used to putting Ellie first, putting yourself second its weird to hear it come from someone else isn’t it? That someone is worried for your safety? That someone needs you living and breathing just as much as you need them doing the same? His eyes immediately change from Imma kill this man to did I just hear this woman right. 
“I’m not okay with you getting blown up either” - first off, the parallelism is what makes this absolute *chef’s kiss* because Nick has literally zero chance of being blown up if he runs after this dude. Shot? Yes. But blown up? No. Ellie has chosen these words precisely to call back to what Nick said earlier. To make sure he’s aware she understood the weight of his earlier confession and is making the same one. They are on equal footing- their feelings are not only reciprocated but just as strong as the other. She could’ve said anything else but choosing his exact words was so poignant in the moment. It’s like the difference between saying “I love you” & “I love you too” compared to “I love you” & “I really care about you.” And the way she says it with such confidence, she isn’t playing around, she didn’t even *have* to bring up their previous conversation, she’s got determination etched across her face with a ghost of a smile on her lips. She means this, and it’s dying to bust out of her. And so the shock to Nick’s system is quite frankly understandable. This is Ellie - someone who hours ago didn’t even want to tell him who she was trying to make a phone call to. Ellie who has walls the size of Mt. Everest erected around her heart. Ellie who could have brushed off his earlier comments said from the safety of a cement wall between them. But no. This Ellie is all-in, she’s ready to own up to her side. She’s ready to lay it on the line just like him. Equal footing. If Nick is ready to jump, then so is she. And he’s just so taken aback- glancing at her lips, blinking through the shock as he processes. Processes the weight of her words on their relationship. He knows he could laugh it off, make a joke about his superhuman strength not allowing him to get blown up, or he could man up and take them both forward. Ellie doesn’t even flinch under his stare, if anything she becomes more confident, more resolute in her words and her stance. Her eyes searching his for what his reaction will be and for a brief moment I swear there’s a tiny bit of worry, a tiny bit of unease that he wasn’t ready for her to repeat his words back to him. 
“Well, what are we gonna do about that?” Oh YOU HEARD. That smirrrrrrrrk Nicholas stop iiiiiit, Eleanor’s standing on a bomb you don’t need to light her on fire!! Because this is a challenge, a goddamn challenge. Staring straight into her soul saying, “oh you want me and I want you? How about we blow this popsicle stand and go get fucking sweaty ok? Because that’s what I want to do about that 👀🔥🔥🔥” and not only is the smirk sexy as hell but it’s also got this glint of elation. Like he could not be happier she said those words back to him. That he finally took Ziva’s advice, wasn’t a wuss and WOULD YOU LOOK AT THAT IT PAID OFF. But his words also tell of a little nervousness. And not necessarily in a bad way, more as in a leaving it to her way. Putting her in the driver’s seat of this relationship knowing it’s where she’ll feel most comfortable. Given all she’s been through, like all of it not just the past week, he knows that she needs to be in control of how fast they move. And once again his chivalry and thoughtfulness of her is just- I cry. He doesn’t just assault her with what they should do next, he leaves it for her to decide. For her to weigh in on how far and how fast she wants to take them. And by the little shy smile Ellie gives him- she knows what he means. She knows her words have hit their mark and that he respects her enough to let her lead the way. And now she has to make her decision, a decision we DON’T GET TO SEE BUT I’M NOT BITTER IT’S FINE. But a decision nonetheless. 
I honestly go two ways on this- the most obvious of hell yes they kissed right then and there and started *something* and then the bitter realistic one of they were probably interrupted by Gibbs (who was literally outside like right then based on timing) but also may have just continued to stare into each other’s eyes- still slightly taken aback by everything they just shared and what it means for them. Still unsure of how they “work” as people who *love* each other, not just partners. Having that reality sink in as they continue to face off and wait for a rescuer. That reality sinking in could lead to obviously very good things (that we better see on our screen or I will fucking riot) or a slight nervous closing-off. Like not quite closed off closed off, but a tiny retreat when the gravity of the day falls down on both of them. I don’t think either will believe they only said what they did because of the situation/moment they were in, but it’s still a lot to deal with after all is said and done. I sincerely hope they unpack this in the coming episodes and give us some direction of what happened after that jail cell scene. 
I love the Torres told McGee about what happened today and I’m so curious about how much detail he told him lol but I also love that McGee has now received genuinely good advice from Torres twice now (the one about the reunion and now this). Just goes to show you the brotherly bond they have ❤️ but also that the advice was the same advice he literally lived out that day. Close calls make you live harder, almost as an affirmation to himself (Nick about what happened), but as something he knew McGee needed to hear too- they all do. 
And then this bullpen scene - one, how far of a time jump is this and whyyyyyyy won’t they telllll meeeeee. They hate me. Two, Ellie coming over so close just to hand off a file that he doesn’t even look at 👀 three, THEIR SMIRKS. WHAT DO THEY MEAN. Because Nick is holding back the world’s biggest smile as Ellie gets close to him and Ellie is just all nonchalantly checking him out with a brief eye-sex scene. Like damn this fine man doesn’t want me to blow up and I don’t want him to blow up either 🔥 Now does this mean they absolutely got together and did the nasty after they got out of that cell? Of course not. We can only dream, and write fics. This ending scene is very reminiscent of what NCIS loves to do with their power of open-ended persuasion at the end of an ep, see On Fire for example. The ending music and comments combined with the shot of Gibbs leaving in the elevator is literally there to try and persuade you that he killed Xavier. In this ep, the ending music and voiceover combined with their looks at each other is there to try and persuade you they totally got it oooooon. Not to say they didn’t, but I don’t trust NCIS one damn bit. 
All in all, cannot *wait* to see where they take ellick the rest of the season. Emily hyped this ep and man, she did NOT disappoint. Let’s see that shift that is going to ripple for the rest of the season now like Wilmer promised 🤞🏼
Oh and my only side note because this was insanely insanely long and if you’re still reading I’m proud of you for hanging in there with me & my screams into the void, send me an ask screaming back it’s ok I’ll love you for it—waaaas the whole team poking fun at Torres for using the word notable was downright hilarious. That and Gibbs trying to do everything himself, I can’t. Comedic gold. I love. I would go from dying of laughter to intense emotions so fast in this ep I got whiplash and for that, I am thankful to Gina. She always delivers 🔥
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bubble-tae · 4 years
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BTS as Boyfriends
Namjoon
• Really just enjoys your company 
• Being in the same room but doing two different things like folding laundry or reading, as long as you’re there 
• No conversation is a stupid conversation 
• Even the light ones hold a lot of value 
• Has a lot of weird theories about people and the world 
• Listening to him is fine, but being able to keep up an intellectual report is preferred 
• On the flip side he’s such a goofball 
• Gets confused about simple things like how to open the lock on the front door 
• Spends a lot of time showing you cute baby animal videos 
• Talks about the future often 
• Marriage/kids/growing old/etc 
• Always obsessed with some new quirky phone game
• If it’s multiplayer he will make you download it too 
• Date nights are always just at home 
• Why go out when you can stay in and play board games? 
• I imagine you both reading in bed at night and talking about if the book sucked or not 
• Intimacy is a private thing 
• No PDA whatsoever, maybe hand holding but that’s it 
• Your family/friends love him more than you, oops 
Seokjin
• Y’all know the crackheadery that’s going to go on 
• Tries to pull pranks but is bad at them 
• Hypes you up as much as he hypes himself up 
• “Waaaah look at this beautiful couple standing in the mirror, so stunning” 
• Very good at turning your sour mood into a good one 
• He’ll listen to your problems, helps you solve them, and then acts like an idiot until you feel better 
• He’s everyone’s best friend so social situations with him are a breeze 
• Likes double dates 
• Sunday’s are lazy days but boy does he clean up nice for Friday night holy shit 
• It’s all about food all the time. The journey is food. The destination is food. 
• I’m serious if there’s no food at a party y’all are leaving 
• Has a mega sweet side
• LOVES BEING LITTLE SPOON HES NOT ASHAMED 
• Wakes you up with tickles and coffee/tea
• Somehow your pantry always has new bottles of wines in them???? 
• If you drink he wants to try a new one almost every night 
• But is super picky, will dump half the bottle down the drain 
• At the end of the day you’re each other’s number ones 
Yoongi
• Soft baby 
• Not super vocal about affection, more physical 
• Playing with your hands, the sleeves of your sweater, etc 
• Looks of affirmation 
• You’ll be in a room of a group of friends and you’ll catch his gaze and give you a sweet smile 
• Spoil you but in a nonchalant way 
• Give you expensive jewelry without batting an eye 
• But will get embarrassed giving you a small sentimental gift 
• Sharing sweat pants, hoodies, beanies, and everything else that’s big n cozy 
• Will blush when he says he loves you 
• Which won’t be super often but really random, though he means it so fucking much 
• Please give him cheek kisses, it’s his weakness 
• Following asleep with his head on your lap is how he likes to spend his afternoons 
• He’ll send you little beats he’s made just cause 
• Will smile while watching you do something and then pretend he wasn’t when you turn to look at him 
• 100% will compliment your mind more than your physical appearance but that doesn’t mean he doesn’t like the way you look 
• Overall just a quiet boy full of love
Hoseok
• Y’all never stop talking 
• Like living together is a nightmare cause you talk all night 
• He’s hyper with most but is super gentle with you 
• Like loud and bubbly in public but whispers cute things in your ear 
• Will always come home from any store with things for you 
• Like he’ll go out for eggs and come back with 10 of your favorite sweets 
• Plays music REALLY LOUD 
• Wants you to dance with him so he can spin you around the room 
• A new album will drop from his favorite artist and he plays it at home and in the car and on his speakers and everywhere he can until you’re sick of it 
• Wants to adopt every puppy he sees 
• You’ll have to drag him out of the pet store 
• Online shopping for clothes 
• There are always packages showing up at the door, you think he has a problem 
• But there’s stuff in there for you too so you don’t complain 
• Tries to be romantic but doesn’t really get it ? 
• Like lighting lots of lavender candles but almost burns the house down 
Jimin
• TOUCHY 
• omg he wants physical contact all the time 
• Kissing your hands, cheeks, shoulders, any part of your exposed skin honestly 
• Will always want his hair played with 
• Like will let you do dumb little braids and ponytails or whatever you want for fun 
• Wants to take you out all the time for dinners and dates 
• You’ll probably start watching a bunch of series together but never finish any of them
• Brutally honest 
• If he thinks an outfit doesn’t look good he won’t sugar coat it 
• Ultimate hype man though when you’re rockin’ it 
• Like mini fashion shows at the store the employees get so sick of you 
• Spoils you with jewelry 
• There’s no need to have all these diamond bracelets but he can’t help himself 
• You’ll go on and on about something you really enjoy and even if he doesn’t get it he’ll listen 
• If someone says anything bad about you he will sass them, no fists just harsh words lmao 
• Jealous type so please give him lots of attention
Taehyung 
• Words of affirmation 
• Calls you cute no matter what you’re doing 
• You could have the worst cold and he’d say your mucus-sneeze was adorable 
• Weekend walks at the park
• ^Stopping to take a picture with every lizard/frog/insect you two see 
• Going out for coffee but steals yours cause he likes it more 
• Begs you to stay up to watch the stars 
• Falls asleep before they even come out
• Whines about it the next day until you kiss it better 
• Tries to cook for you but is so bad at it
• But you’ll eat his burnt steak cause you love him for trying 
• I feel like he leaves sticky notes everywhere of just doodles??? They don’t even say anything he just gets bored 
• Will laugh at your cheesy jokes 
• Doesn’t know what to do when you’re mad like he just goes full baby mode 
• When he’s upset he gets all pouty and just wants to be held 
• ALMOST FORGOT ABOUT MUSEUM DATES 
• Deep talks about art and the universe that you won’t remember the next day 
• Maybe I’m hyper biased but just a good ole boy 
Jungkook
• meme king 
• Sends you everything he thinks is funny 
• If you aren’t following his Twitter is it even love 
• Anime watch parties 
• Will make you dress up as dorky characters for Halloween 
• Forgetful 
• Like “oh shit it’s our anniversary??” But will make it up to you the next day
• He’s such a classic romantic 
• Flowers and chocolate and heart shaped lockets 
• The lockets are matching, of course 
• Wants a secret couple tattoo 
• Will cry during romantic movies 
• Insistent on doing everything because he’s always babied and wants to be able to baby someone 
• Gets absorbed into trying to learn a new skill so often that you can barely keep up 
• Last week it was the cinematic history of horror and this week it’s managing stocks for beginners??? 
• Honestly loves it when you watch him play video games 
• Will love it more if you get frustrated with how bad he is and take the controller/keyboard from him to show him how it’s done 
• Doesn’t have to be older than him but loves strong/powerful women 
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transsexualhamlet · 3 years
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tg anime vs manga *sighs*
i have the power of hyperfixation and anime on my side! AAAAAAAA
Ok now that we’ve gotten the sins of re post out of the way we need to discuss this. And I just feel that this needs to be covered because I can’t ever get away from constant discourse on this, mostly fueled by manga readers who feel entitled to always think they’re superior for reading the manga, that the manga is the only real canon, that it’s more complex or better, I’m so fucking tired of it. I am also a manga reader, and I tend to get like that sometimes too with many series (for example no. 6 and the promised neverland.) I get it. It can be really annoying to see something butchered on screen to what the original is, changed or represented differently or given a different message or simplified. But just. Some people like the anime and it’s not a goddamn holy war for y’all to fight. It only makes anime fans not want to read the thing even more yknow cause manga readers are pretentious assholes, and I am aware of this as one of them.
(again ok i’d like to mention i know this fandom is basically dead but a certain p*nterest is always like 4 years behind on fandoms so i keep fucking running into Discourse that’s like, still current, whenever i want old random ass content) (and youtube, why do i look at youtube comments, because I personally enjoy being offended? yeah probably)
And that brings me to the point of this anime vs manga. 
This is a lot harder to compare than a lot of other series, because there are just... so many more differences not just in the style and vibe but the story itself.
Disclaimer, I’ve never watched the anime for :re and i don’t intend to, because I honestly have no earthly clue how tf you can get from the highly diverged tokyo ghoul root A to re and make it make sense, and I don’t really want A ruined for me. So you can call me biased towards the manga in the case of re, i guess (which makes my eventual conclusion even more strong I’d say) Honestly I just see them as two completely different stories, the manga’s version connecting with re and A just like... ending there. So how we’re drawing the lines is basically tokyo ghoul A versus the manga and :re. God, I know this isn’t a fair fight because I already hate re so much, but I feel like the manga’s story is much more intertwined with :re than the anime’s is, so that’s what we’re going with.
oh god also another disclaimer this opinion is coming from the biggest fucking kanehide whore, you can disregard anything i say if you ship The Straights and/or do not care for my boi hide
To be honest, if I can take my own conclusions and liberties to the story, I like both versions, each have their pros and cons and kind of a conflicting message. They can’t really coexist. Usually I’d consume all versions and then create one consistent canon in my head for what I accept as the true events (for example my main owari no seraph, first season of the anime is canon but after that we only follow the manga since those can come together and make sense.) but it’s very hard to do that in tokyo ghoul, since I must confess... I really like root A. Like of course, it’s a lot different from the manga, but tbh I think it’s super valid. (unlike most Fans TM like this Fan TM who i’m sending this post to just to spite their singular Youtube Comment Section Discourse, yes I did write this post for you and many others like you) But the ideas that make up root A conflict a lot with the ones of the manga, so I just have to accept that they’re separate things and treat them as such.
Now to break it down so people can understand where I’m coming from I guess? God this is already so long here’s a read more
The Case for The Manga (including :re manga)
More Lore + Plot Shit: One of the main reasons that manga readers are pretentious little bitches is a valid reason, namely that, as is the case with most manga, there’s simply more to it than people can fit into an anime. (Although people need to understand that’s because,,, it’s simply a different medium, so it will have different pluses and minuses, such as for example a soundtrack, color, moving pictures,,, you know, all that. Anime onlys don’t say that the anime is better by stating these things that a manga won’t have... because they’re fucking obvious. So manga readers should stop acting like an anime is inherently sub-par for being less in depth, but we digress.) I can understand that reading the manga is kind of important for wanting to understand the lore (though there are like so many other reasons ppl might want to watch it other than to get the lore) and without the explanation of how all this came to be and how it works, everything tends to be really mysterious, confusing, and seemingly random. It’s really nice to know what’s all going on, of course, and stuff like the washuus, rize’s backstory, the explanation for like, kaneki in general, all that- if you’re looking for like, plot shit, manga is definitely your go to. But like, sometimes, you like, don’t actually care about those things.
Haise: Of course one of the most important things about well, including re is that I fucking love Haise. Like he is my favorite Kaneki. He’s just so wonderful, look at him in he glasses and he floofy hair and he striped pants and he energy boxers and he s p i c e and he MOM. And I really like how they took Kaneki’s character and developed it more with Haise, you can see his turnaround from innocent--> Emo--> Trying To Be Innocent Again But Failing and I think that’s really sweet tbh. I rejected that at first because I didn’t understand it but once I actually read re I thought it made a lot of sense and was a logical thing to do with his character. (though, uh, moving forward, after his hair changes again i disagree with it, haise 1.0 is a good take and i love him and i want the best for him) I could go on I’ve already written a post of what I think is wrong with :re so if you want to hear my take on kaneki’s 37 pokemon evolutions that’s in there
Good New Characters: And of course there are my favorite bitches such as quinx squad, oh my god, there was a terminal lack of dumbass squad vibes in the original and ishida fucking gave it to us, I love them, I love them with all my heart and I think that if I wasn’t attached to them I’d probably just cancel all of :re but like this is just my personal problem. God I love them. Ishida always pulls through with characters I’m now too attached to.
Vore Lmao:Ok like hear me out. I just get a laugh out of it every time the manga has to remind me of this little fucking fact. Like ok I just. Cannot get over it. It’s so serious about it too and like I realize it’s a serious deal but o h  m y  g o d
Ok and now that we’ve got that little rant over I do want to say that it is like actually really important past the “lmao that’s pretty gay” bit, like??? In some ways it’s more fitting than the anime because well, ishida’s point always seems to be “what would mentally and physically hurt kaneki the most right now” and does it because that’s who this bitch is. But it just?? Kind of makes a bit more sense for the storyline if we’re being picky here, it’s so,,, painfully on point? Like the entire reason he gave in to Being A Ghoul and all was so he could save his friends and shit (i actually do not remember if this was a thing in the manga but like? when he was being tortured and he like imagined hide being really mad at him and getting killed by jason and shit?) LIKE AND THEN HE GOES AND HAS TO BASICALLY BE THE PERPETRATOR OF THAT HIMSELF, FUCK, it’s a lose/lose situation of “don’t do the bad thing and watch your friends suffer” or “do the bad thing and watch your friends suffer but like, later” ishida please
The meaning of Hide being alive: Ok this is just me crying over chapter 75 still but like. Instead of in the anime, where hide’s point seems to be that instead of letting kaneki sacrifice anything more he’d be the one to give his life up and such, and save kaneki, in the anime tbh he just really wanted to be with kaneki right then?? and like ouch but understanding that in the manga he wasn’t just planning on dying and leaving kaneki to deal with it afterward he wanted to go on and continue to try to help the guy no matter the shit he had to go through, no matter if the dude just like forgot that he existed for two years and all- LIKE UH CAN WE TALK ABOUT HOW HIDE DOESN’T EVEN EXPECT ANY APOLOGY? like kaneki’s like “OH MY GOD I’M SUCH A TERRIBLE PERSON” and hide’s like lmao nah it’s cool i’m thriving- that his big motto was “live” rather than “peace out motherfuckers it’s been fun”. Cause. Fucking. Ishida. Can’t kill off characters well but like at least he made keeping this one alive justified. 
The D e t a i l s: Ok well I feel like this is something everyone knows but the anime is missing a lot of really,,, crunchy details that the manga throws in there, like, well, kaneki’s fucking,,, bones thing, and other assorted details, g o d like those are missable if you want to never understand half the memes but also like,,, sometimes you just gotta read that shit. It also like, makes more sense when you do but sometimes it’s just stupid things that aren’t important but are fucking hilarious.
The Flavor: In general I’d say the greatest difference between the anime and the manga is the general flavor of the thing, the vibe in the manga is a lot, to be frank, darker and grosser and bloodier than the anime, which is a lot more focused on being pretty and Tragic than “HOLY SHIT WTF” but like. That’s valid. With that comes it being a lot more, real, and although the art may not be as polished as the anime’s, sometimes that’s exactly what you need, and the really gritty sketchy shit that’s in the manga sometimes is exactly what it’s supposed to be for the manga. (in the anime, i’d say that the colored and polished style fits it better, so we’re good there.) It’s a lot more real, in the manga, when the anime hesitates to “go there” a lot (and well, sometimes that’s welcome, but sometimes it’s like y o u  g u y s  c o m e  o n  r e a l l y maybe i DID want to see that did you ever think of that)
So like, to sum it up i’d just like to say it’s more detailed, sharper and darker and is simply So Much. There is just More Content
The Case for Root A
ON THE OTHER HAND, (buckle up fuckers)
Depth of Emotion (that Ishida was too much of a pissbaby for): God like you know what I mean if you read the last post, we spent a whole episode on these gay fucks in root A, with backstory and dreams and drawn out suspense and emotion and GUYS LOOK AT THEM NO REALLY OH MY GOD YOU HAVE TO UNDERSTAND HOW IMPORTANT THIS IS whereas hide’s limelight in the manga is a whole... two pages, oh whoopee, and that’s mostly due to the fact of ishida putting himself in a spot of “oh fuck goddamn if i drew that in i’d get flagged for gay porn” but that’s his own fault, so he downplays the whole scene and really keeps it in the dark, whereas in this anime it’s understandably a lot less,,, like that, but how it plays out here is simply... really nice and makes you cry and shit, whereas in the manga I’d go “oh god oh damn oh fuck” *laughs my ass off because i really can’t take this seriously*. You get just... more here.
To elaborate on this, in the anime, as a gay fucking bastard, I can get practically an endless amount of content from episode twelve, and endlessly stew over all Those Things about it, every hard hitting line, the expressions, the music making it even sadder, the ways the VAs say the words, the cinematic beauty of the blood dripping on the floor and like how it’s supposed to make you think it’s kaneki’s, GOD I COULD FUCKING GO ON, but if we want to get that in the manga... 
we get three incredibly basic lines, a blackout, and then a “QUICK LET’S MOVE ON TO SOMETHING ELSE BEFORE ANYONE NOTICES THE IMPLICATIONS OF THAT HAHA”
So if we want to have more, we need to write it. (sadly) None of it is ever played out canonically so like,,, all we can do is infer and make shit up. It’s like, I am a writer so like that’s my whole job but I really would rather have more content, and have the content that’s there get to be emotional instead of *blank face* “this is plot that is happening, sadly” but like maybe it’s just bc i’m gay
Really Fucking Beautiful (aesthetically as well as story-wise): This kind of just goes hand in hand with the depth of emotion bit, and I think it can’t really compared to the manga here because I’m gay so I see pretty colors and cry so the anime is understandably appealing for me, but I’m also talking emotionally, yeah. There’s a lot of plotlines and implications of the story that are really well played out, I always love to watch the original because it does a very good job handling a lot of the harder topics and stuff that makes the whole thing worthwhile- like the whole point you’re supposed to see that the ghouls and humans are both just as monstrous when you break it down, that there are good and bad people on both sides, everyone just wants to live and feel good in their own life and perspective, everyone has reasons that justify their behaviour in their mind, sometimes you just can’t win no matter what, all that... they’re all really important messages and make the whole story, and they were handled much more delicately and with more expertise in the anime. 
It’s hard to pin down, but I feel like the manga was just based more on Fight Scenes Characters OoH Fake Science and kind of just gave kaneki infinite power ups after Trying Harder no offense, obviously those things were there and they were still very good in the manga it’s just sometimes they were cheapened a lot by ishida really not keeping track of what he’s trying to say with his story and sacrificing it a lot for “BUT WHAT IF KANEKI’S HAIR AND IDEALS CHANGED AGAIN” instead of making it a whole cohesive work. (and yes, I am VERY aware of your “well aCtuAlLy the hair represents his sanity” thing i know i know and i’m about to rip it to fucking shreds so)
Understandable Character Development And Staying True To It: Which brings me to this point, character development. This was another thing that was just... handled with more expertise in the anime, whoever was in charge of it. Mostly this has to do with Kaneki, since like, no offense but he’s the only one who ever gets much character development other than like, juuzou (asmr you only get character development if your hair color changes) oh and i guess there’s tsukiyama but he’s someone who shouldn’t have gotten character development. Touka gets character development only before re for some reason, and like tbh that’s kind of it. I do think Juuzou’s character development was valid, because well... it made sense? I complained about it before because I was like “well he just turns into spicy L” but i’ve since changed my opinion, he’s best boy. But Kaneki? They went way overboard with him in the manga, and generally? Calm tf down ishida.
Breaking it down, one of the main things that most of the tried and true manga stans seem to hate about the anime the most is Kaneki going over to Aogiri in root A. Since they’re much more acclimated to the manga, they don’t understand why he would do that (quoting a particular ‘probably made sense in the manga!’ yes i know that whole thing was poking fun at the show and i felt it lmao) and they just pin it to “ahaha he has now become Edgy for the fans ehehe time to make fun of him” and TO BE FAIR YOU’D BE COMPLETELY RIGHT. I love to make fun of Kaneki when he does his edgy bitch thing because that’s what he is. A basic edgy bitch who is just,,, such a main character. But like. He does actually have his reasons despite popular opinion and to be honest I think they’re a bit more valid than in the manga, where he’s just like “well I’ve been tortured, that was not pleasant and i kinda did a bad thing, let’s go back to anteiku but i’m just gonna Try Harder To Fight this time”. I can understand that, but like, it seems like in the manga every Character Development of kaneki is some form of “i will now be stronger” except for the singular “I will now be a different person” which, well, we’ll get to that. 
In the anime though, even if it seems like more of a basic edgy bitch move, it’s like?? It makes perfect sense to me, and to be honest more than the manga does? Obviously he doesn’t wanna be best bros with Aogiri, he realizes they’re all bad people who have done really terrible things, but the fact is he now sees himself as the same thing, he now understands their motives because in his mind he is also now Bad TM. His whole character development of being tortured was that peace wasn’t an option no matter how much he wanted it, he couldn’t live being a pacifist and the world was forcing him to give the “i am the only one that understands! we need to stop fighting!” bullshit up because there was no way to achieve it. He realized if he kept himself the way he was more people he loved would be hurt like they already had because he couldn’t, so he doesn’t just Decide To Become Stronger, he gives up his humanity. And that includes basically letting himself defend his own actions and try to do “the right thing”. 
Him then joining aogiri makes sense because well. They’re the people who are the strongest, who have the power, who are the same as he sees himself. He still wants to protect the people he loves, he just also realizes he can’t do it by working with them since he now understands that their more peaceful ways will by definition get them fucking killed. His understanding is flawed, of course. He’s not really right. But this is his understanding and from that it makes perfect sense for him to join up with aogiri and try to still do as much as possible from that standpoint, realizing that most likely the people he’s trying to protect will hate him for it. I think that makes sense to me, what do you not understand about it? (I also understand that may make some people mad because he’d Doing Bad Things but I point to you he’s so soft, remember when he was really nice to naki when he was literally the one who killed the guy naki was crying about? remember when he was doing a raid and he saw that guy hiding and he never mentioned it? remember like the seventy times he Cried TM, yeah he’s problematic obviously but if you want problematic I’ll point you to a certain fucking black reaper. Shironeki has nothing on that asshole.)
I think what Kaneki did in the manga was fine, but in general the anime (again) had more depth of understanding and emotion versus a steady Try Harder Get Stronger shonen deal, which, well, fair, but like, nah. Continuing why I think the anime dealt it better is the ending of A, which was a lot more well rounded then *kaneki gets stabbed and then there’s a lot of random plot shit going on in the background*. Here Kaneki then got to round out the end of his character development by realizing slowly through the second half of this season, him becoming a kakuja and then basically deciding like, not to
((kakuja kaneki was dealt with again different in the anime and manga because he basically stopped trying to use it in the anime bc he realized it was a bad fucking idea but this goes along with the ‘his character development of “i’m gonna do bad things for good reasons” --> “actually no wait that was a bad idea” was actually done in root A instead of being dragged out into :re and it’s appropriate for its own medium and the messages it’s trying to get across so manga loyalists hate it’ but we digress))
So in root A we got to see him actually develop and realize himself through the second half of the season starting with cochlea, his interactions with Amon, and ultimately through Hide, that he’d been doing the wrong thing by becoming more monstrous/fighting harder because what he did was ended up forgetting the most important thing, *smiles in gay* HIDE.(well, his humanity. yeah. i cite the terrible opening for root A with the fun ‘the hands taking off kaneki’s mask are hide’s’ bit.) He then remembered again why he wanted so bad to stop the war between humans and ghouls, he wanted to be able to live in peace and not have to be a monster- something that was not dealt with in the manga (though for understandable reasons of We Need To Fuck With Him In Re More, they then didn’t deliver on creating something like that later so I take this.)
That’s most of the difference between the original manga and anime, but I’d also like to discuss (briefly, I’ve already yelled about them) the ridiculous amount of hurdles ishida went through to fuck with kaneki in the manga, Of course there is the fact that well, the slower transition of his character does make some more sense for the manga because if you take :re into consideration, his eight billion character changes are more tolerable when they haven’t like, already happened before in the manga (just the anime). It makes more sense there for Haise to be tormented by past kaneki telling him He’s Too Weak because in the manga he hasn’t already had that development prior to “dying”, and he lost his memories still believing he had to be strong even if he did bad things, whereas in the anime it doesn’t track because at the end like i just said he kind of gives up his ghoulhood on purpose because he realizes that joining aogiri and fighting and shit was really wrong because, hide. So I can see why those character decisions were not made in the original when planning for :re, but... the fact remains that those previous decisions do not make up for how absolutely weak :re’s game ended up being with kaneki. 
So tldr this entire section, All the manga’s defense of how they handled Kaneki’s development is basically void because all those choices were buildup for development in :re which ishida then COMPLETELY fell down on. So the alternative is better.
And now comes my yelling about how exactly Ishida fucked it up: hair colors and kaneki’s 80 kanekis. If black is supposed to represent sane and white is supposed to represent insane or, whatever, i dunno, who tf thought black reaper kaneki was sane? Who tf would think kaneki in the end isn’t? I haven’t looked into this really, and I’d really love it if someone explained it to me the way ishida was going for bc I do not understand it. Like that tracks with Juuzou, and with Kaneki up to Haise Original, but they don’t really make a cohesive sense seeing as after Haise’s hair color changed again that whole deal kind of goes to shit. Not to mention... I just... they completely failed to make those character changes actually part of the story, I’m mostly complaining about black reaper haise, none of him makes any sense. What’s his deal? He wants to protect who he loves? Tracks with the ghouls but fun fact he abandoned his kids? He actually cared for them? What then, he wants to be the strongest as possible? Sure but then?? Why?? I don’t understand his motives at all.
We also didn’t get to see him get his memories back either, which I was actually very much looking forward to, it just,,, like all of a sudden he’s talking with eto about yoshimura and i’m like bruh when tf did that happen? It’s bad, and although chapter 74-76 is super valid, and his change back into white hair kaneki makes sense, I also have the complaint about how haise basically disappeared just like he was worried he would. I think that was bad and I’ve said that already, it doesn’t make sense, he just literally throws those entire two years away to go back to the way he was before he was with the CCG and just forgets everything he’s wanted for the last few years? Fiction logic test fucking failed, and you’ve also broken my heart. Love Haise. You got rid of him. I love kaneki too but like. Why don’t they just. Like. Merge. He is one whole complex person, not one and an imposter, god. 
This is a big negative for re and the manga, so automatically a positive for root A where I simply Do Not Have To Deal With That Bullshit and the character development actually makes sense. I can understand the decisions in the original manga could have set up for good development in :re, but they completely failed to deliver.
root a didn’t fast forward to re at the end god damn let us process this shit first before you try to connect it to something else: The thing with this point is that it’s really difficult to separate the original manga from the continuing story in :re because the thing intertwines so much and immediately moves us forward with a ton of plot points for the next part of the story before we’re done with this climax and the end of this story. Sometimes that’s ok and I can see doing that from an author’s perspective because you want people to continue reading your story instead of taking that as the end but it’s really annoying on a reader’s end, because I’m picky and I want to be able to just be able to enjoy my original canon without it like, metaphorically touching :re on a plate. It’s something that I don’t even do with my own longer stories, like for example I have like a trilogy of >100k fics that like, well i’m technically not done with them but like. 
People really like the first one because it’s more focused on a more popular ship and basic elements people like about the thing, and then by the second book it moves on to talk more about the plot and lore and brings in more secondary characters. And so I knew that a lot of the readers of the first one wouldn’t want to have to deal with a lot of the “oh well stuff is happening elsewhere that will effect stuff later!!!” random plot shit that none of my readers actually cared about. So I kept it to wrapping up the points of the first book and then leaving the introduction of new characters and plot for the people who actually wanted to read it. Ishida didn’t do that, and of course it’s within his right to like?? Want to promote the next series but I’d have enjoyed it more if we ended it at kaneki’s “death” and wrapping up the deals with the rest of the characters instead of quickly shoving in the beginning of seventy more plotlines before the book ends. Like honey I simply do not have the reading comprehension for that. In the anime we get something that... makes sense.
In the anime, however, it’s quite the opposite, for example the reveals like Eto=owl=takatsuki sen were pushed before that and they saved episode twelve for, well, the end bit. Like what was actually the ending. There were detriments to this I had to say (LIKE GUYS I GET IT HE’S CARRYING HIDE HE’S CARRYING HIM I GET IT YOU’VE BEEN DOING IT FOR HALF THE EPISODE NOW OK I UNDERSTAND CAN WE MOVE ON) But like, I prefer the concept of a simple idea with as much emotion squeezed out of it as possible to a ton of confusing and contradicting ideas that are touched on for a second before moving on. So the *cries for half an hour* ending was much more appealing to me, and I can keep that separate in my head from any of the ideas that :re creates, letting me pretend it doesnt exist and imagine that’s the end and there’s nothing else to worry about. If we want to move forward and hear more, then we can, but it isn’t necessary like it is with the manga.
No Bad Takes that are hard to pry apart from good plot and characters:This is basically the downsides of the new characters, which is well, if I had to make a whole ~keep reading~ post about how problematic everything in re was that does have to count as a downside. I love the new characters, but they also come intertwined with a thousand really bad takes on like, everything, and of course I can ignore it and just act as though they were written in like, to be perfectly honest, a non transphobic way, it’s a real downside when the original anime was pretty pain-free in the way of their takes on their characters. They fucked everyone up in re and I will not elaborate, we’ve talked about this, it’s just the anime, and which i mean season 1 and root A, don’t really have any bad takes I need to try to get rid of, it’s surprisingly something I have little complaint about at all and I ALWAYS have complaints.
Hide!!!!: Obviously, you can tell that a lot of my opinions are going to be hide based because he’s the only thing I ever think about. But we have to take into account just how... hide???? This goes a lot into the depth of emotion bit but it also offers the other side of the argument for Hide’s part in the :re manga, which well. Was mostly chapter 75 if we’re going to be perfectly honest here. He doesn’t get any other limelight. Even in the chapter where Kaneki meets him again he gets a whole what, three pages? In the manga, he has an extremely valid deal about basically, living, keeping going no matter what, and that is a fitting part for the manga, considering the rest of the points there ride more on Keep Fighting instead of Think About Your Emotions And Morals, but honestly chapter 75 was really valid. So why do I still think the anime’s version where he like (ok I don’t know about the re anime we’ve discussed this, i don’t even know how they choose to explain that) he like, dies in kaneki’s arms is better overall? Again, I would have totally accepted that deal if it was made a part of the story because it made me cry, it was super valid, and if they’d continued in that way I would have agreed with it completely over that. But the fact is again that they failed to deliver, and Hide got largely ignored, suffered so much with so little outcome. There was so much buildup and it was incredibly valid, but when the time came for them to meet again and basically show... why it was important that Hide lived in the end? 
They didn’t. They straight up didn’t. Kaneki’s like “oh sorry bro... glad you’re alive and all...” *goes off and fights* and like? Honestly? @everlastingspiral is right, if that’s all they’re gonna do with him what’s the point of keeping him alive? I love every single panel of him and I wouldn’t have read re if he didn’t, but hide gets absolutely NO payoff. For letting kaneki literally vore his entire mouth off, leaving him disfigured and unable to talk, then kind of disappearing for two years and doing seemingly nothing but trying to help kaneki even though he’d forgotten the guy existed, risks his life like a thousand fucking times, eventually gets back to him and the dude’s running a fucking anti-human organization, helps him like Not Be A Volitile Pile Of Flesh Anymore and then what should have been a very important moment of them meeting again gets completely overshadowed by touka and random plot shit and more fights and they barely interact, they don’t even hug or anything, they barely talk, and at the end hide is still there but to be honest he’s gotten absolutely no thanks for all he did and ishida acts at the end as though he’s done very well with hide and gives him a tiny bit at the end throwing in a tragic backstory for fun (which hot take he really didn’t fucking need on top of it all) and... there’s no real hint that Kaneki is better off with Hide there, even though there should be. In 75, in his dream, kaneki is sobbing and crying and all like i’m so lonely without you but when they actually meet each other again? “yo” “hey” “uh sorry about,,, the thing,,, you know” “nah man it’s ok” “let me talk about myself for a bit” “yes you always do do you want to hear what I’ve been up to” “not really” “that’s fine i’m only here to support you”
...So you can understand why I’ve gone a bit sour on that. If that’s all you’re going to give him? Hot take? Let him die. Hide deserves better. (and i will deliver that in writing, but for the purposes of canon.)
In the anime, however (not counting re again... although he still gets the short end of the stick just in the original manga too compared to the anime) he’s properly dealt with! he gets his proper limelight and he gets acknowledged for what he’s done thusfar in the story, which is already so much. Kaneki then realizes that, but it’s already too late (or it isn’t, and they like negotiate with the ccg and then they get to live happily ever after) either way he gets appreciated and he gets hurt, but it’s properly acknowledged. And after all that, after saving kaneki and getting him to the cafe and doing it all while bleeding the fuck out, he gets to spend that time with kaneki and die in kaneki’s arms. And frankly? That’s all I think he’s ever needed. It’s really poetic and pretty and brings kaneki’s character around full circle, and even if it’s overly sappy, cliche, drawn out... he gets the attention he’s due and he gets a fucking break. He wanted to show Kaneki he wanted to do something for him and save him instead of the other way around, but then HE GOT ACKNOWLEDGED FOR THAT, instead of just well, tirelessly working towards it forever and having to be content to be a background character with practically no value to Kaneki anymore.
Keeps The Same Vibe: The big thing about this is that with the manga and with re, shit just goes all over the place, and I feel like I’ve amply showed that already through this essay or whatever this is. Again about the consistency and the professionalism, It’s a concise story that makes more sense than the manga while also being simply neater and more deep, making sure all the points, themes and messages work together and make sense to create a cohesive deal even if it’s not as long. (the manga is like ishida had a TON of good ideas for an essay but then fleshed out the thing ten minutes before deadline and managed to completely lose what his original thesis was even if the thing was 10 pages long.) Basically. yeah. That kind of sums it up, my last point concerns the ending.
Not Cheap Ending: If you want to hear my take about how absolutely terrible re’s ending was, check out my The Many Sins Of Tokyo Ghoul :Re post, and we’ve discussed how the original’s manga ending was bad and well not really an ending, it just leaves you unfulfilled and takes you into “well I guess I have to start a whole nother sequel series ig...” but root A like? Actually ends it? If a reader didn’t know that there was any content after that, they could pretty much infer that hide’s death or almost death whatever you inferred out of that ending (again we’re ignoring re) allowed Kaneki to finish his character development and realize they needed to stop the war, which basically tracks with what’s going on in everyone else’s perspective- eto’s problem with the world because of what happened with everything, is basically like, all of aogiri, juuzou and shinohara, amon and akira and kaneki and they can realize all they have to do is just sit down and fucking stop it because none of them want to be fighting, hide is the catalyst for that because the CCG can see how Kaneki cares for him? And it’s so open ended that you could just like literally believe that and there’d be no way for that canon to tell you otherwise, or you could go onto re and whatever if you wanted to. I think that’s the best thing. 
In conclusion, both have valid points, and in general I’d say that the manga goes better with :re and the anime is better as a stand alone but if I had to choose overall, this particular anime is better (taking into account only seasons 1 and 2), for mostly the reasons of favoring a simpler story taken with much more care and depth versus a more complex story with many, MANY imperfect elements, and I am aware I will get shot on sight for this opinion. So sue me.
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hansols-yoda-boxers · 3 years
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(pt. 1) as an allo, i will say i experience the things on the first list, but like most of the time. it's not a constant thing where i just constantly get horny seeing or thinking about people i'm sexually attracted to. sometimes when im super not in the mood i don't feel anything, and that feeling can last for weeks. but when i am in the mood, it's that first list on overdrive omg. there's other things going on and not just me being allo (hormonal cycles, etc.)
[I’m gonna jump in with two things. This is long so I’ll put most of it as well as my response under a cut. And if any other allos or gray-aces wanna tell me about how they feel sexual attraction feel free to I am fascinated and confused]
Some of that I get, like libido is attached to hormones as well as mood and general well being at times. And if libido and attraction are linked for you that would make sense. Idk how you would get anything done if you were constantly distracted by this kinda stuff
(pt. 2) so yea i feel the first list semi-regularly, and it can happen with people i've never personally met, or even fictional characters (*stares in yelena from black widow*). and the level of sexual attraction and how intensely i feel that first list, that can differ from person to person. and the intensity can go through ebbs and flows as well. for me anyway it's not a static state of constant high arousal or constant medium arousal or anything like that. there's other factors that go into i
(pt. 3) there's other factors that go into it. but to answer one of your questions yes, this is why some people ask about dick sizes. that visual helps fuel the fantasy more and can increase sexual attraction once there's a visual to attach to the person you're attracted to. for me personally, i can experience that type of attraction, very intensely, for a bunch of different people, some at the same time (this is why on my blog you'll see me jumping from person to person so much). and idk how tm
You know, it occurs to me that I don’t ever picture their dicks? That’s just not a thing that I want to imagine. But I’ll come back to that in a bit. 
(pt. 4) and idk how tmi this is (this whole thing might be so if it is feel free to ignore) but when i'm in my "i wanna be railed and that's the only thing on my mind" mood, i can fantasize about anyone i'm sexually attracted to, or multiple people i'm sexually attracted to, and it'll give those intense orgasms op was talking about. this is part of why i insert myself in reader inserts, bc if i don't i just can't get into it as much.
(pt. 5) i can't always imagine someone i'm sexually attracted to fucking someone else and kinda reading it like a voyeur. often that doesn't do anything for me. i gotta imagine myself in those situations. that's part of the reason i'm so picky when it comes to reader insert stuff (and why it's so easy to get my feelings hurt when there aren't proper warnings). i just really immerse myself and during those times where my hormones make me extra horny, honestly any orgasm i have will be intense
I do know that being more mentally into something makes the feelings better and more pleasurable. And I do remember talking about that. It’s interesting that it makes it better for you. I think you mentioned once something about it tying to who you write for as well. 
But yeah I could never insert myself. If I try and picture myself I get really grossed out (for more reasons than one though) and can’t keep reading. I have to have a disconnect from what I read to some level. I can sort of step into the shoes of the pov character a little bit (and I do get invested somewhat, there are some kinks that that I can’t read about with a reader insert that I would happily read in member x member) but there has to be some distance or I can’t do it. And for writing even more so.
(pt. 6) but especially if i'm imagining doing something i'm into with someone i'm sexually attracted to. and for me personally, it's usually not just looks that'll get me sexually attracted to someone. when i say i like funny people, i mean on many occasions, i can't be sexually attracted to a person unless i find them humorous. this doesn't always happen, but most of the time if you're not funny or i don't enjoy hearing you talk, i can't be sexually attracted to you.
mmmm yes, other factors can go into primary attraction other than just looks. 
(pt. 7) there's a bunch of people i know that, bc of other physical factors that i generally like in a person, i may have been sexually attracted to, but i never have been bc they're just not funny to me. so as soon as someone makes me laugh or smile or i find them humorous, even if i'm just watching them in a video, other factors about them become attractive to me and i end up sexually attracted then. this goes for some ggs where, i like them, but i can't write smut for them bc i don't find
(pt. 8) bc i don't find them funny. this goes for bgs as well, but bc of the difference in presentation this happens more often with ggs for me. this went all over the place so i guess in conclusion, for me, i go feral when people make me laugh and generally have physical traits that i tend to find sexual. i can feel sexual attraction to people based on looks alone, but in general they gotta make me laugh first. and this fluctuates i'm not in a constant state of feral. sometimes i feel nothing.
It is really interesting cuz there are so many things I like in other people but those things don’t turn me on. I realize that I have been using the term feral different from y’all lmao. 
At the moment I’m trying to parse out if, in my last relationship, I wanted sex because I wanted it with him, or because I was comfy with him, it felt good, and I knew he would be caring. At this point like like sex with the right person and I know I desire it in a sensual sense, but not in a person sense (I’ve been in a very don’t touch me mood lately. Like I wanna feel these sensations but I absolutely do not want a person to cause them)
Also I never fantasized about my partners. I can with idols sort of? But there’s a massive disconnect. It’s more of a character with a story line than just, imagining have sex. And any imagining of having sex, suddenly I’m not thinking about their voice or face because doing that makes things supremely uncomfy. I kinda wonder, do y’all fantasize about your crushes sexually? Cuz that was another thing I could never do. If I explored the ideas it just felt really weird and any sexual dreams about friends always make me feel real uncomfy.
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pocket-void · 4 years
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Hi Mock!
I wish you a good morning! (It's currently 8:30 am here and I hope you are asleep wherever you are because healthy sleep schedules and all that!) 🌻
I just found out that you write, too, and I've read "A cup of coffee" and honestly, is there something you can't do? Because that was really great! I enjoyed reading it so much!! And I love your Logan in it!
And can I ask: where so you get the motivation to do all this great stuff? Drawing, writing, school? Like, I have like 5 different writing projects screaming at me because I don't work on them and yesterday I outlined yet another fic that I'll probably never write because I just don't have the motivation and - how do you do it? Because I want to write. It's the best thing in the world to me. But I just can't get myself to do it, and when I do, everything I make feels kinda... not good. Ugly, if you will.
So I guess I just want to know what I can do to get myself away from that? Because I really need to write, I'll go insane otherwise O_o
Anyway, have a wonderful day and eat a cookie!! 🌼
Y’all who can format stuff in asks will never cease to bamboozle me. O///o
But hello!! I believe it’s the afternoon where you are now! ^\\\^ (Not to worry, if there’s one thing I try to get enough of it’s sleep!)
Heidhwkfns Yes I write too but it’s incredibly on and off since I’m not as confident with it and it takes much longer than art! >\\\< I 100% want to write more often tho, but my need to accomplish stuff just finds art less time consuming. I’m really glad you like “A Cup of Coffee” because I’m quite happy with how that one turned out! ^\\\^ (And also just genuinely surprised at how many people enjoyed it) So thank you!! ;///;✨💖
So, here’s the thing. I’m just a normal person, just like anybody else! There are days where I have 0 motivation to do anything, and days where I’m way too motivated but still do absolutely nothing anyways lmao- I can’t say that my experience will work for everybody of course, but I can try to explain how I feel or how I work things out when I don’t feel like doing things. u///u
The first step is to forgive myself, because it’s going to be ok. There’s nothing wrong with having an off day, and nothing wrong with not accomplishing anything for now. There should be no guilt involved in not touching something for ages, god knows I’ve got so much in the “maybe later” idea box that I will never get to. But that’s ok! My creations will never blame me for not working on them, so in turn I promised to never blame myself for it either. And if I ever go back to complete one of them, great! But if not, that still doesn’t mean that it was a waste. Everything you make has value, finished or not.
The second is to remember that I love them. I love them a lot. I love creating, I love art, I love writing, and I love the process behind them! What you write and create will never complain if they are “not the best” or “ugly”. Their value comes from how you feel about them. Nobody else’s imput matters. So what if it’s not great? So what if it’s a mess? My terrible crayon drawing from when I was 4? Love it. Still has my whole heart. They’re on my bedroom wall to this day! (Neatly framed and hung, courtesy of my dad) I ask myself why I sat down to do something in the first place, and the answer is always going to be because I love doing it! Everything I make means something to me, no matter how bad or how small. Because at the end of the day, I made something. And it’s all the reason I need to love it.
It doesn’t matter if this doodle looks bad or this draft makes literally no sense because even if it’s not good, I did it. Even if I feel like I’m going nowhere, I know that each creation is a small step in my long long journey of improvement. It might not seem like that sometimes, like everything we do doesn’t really seem like it’s getting better any time soon, but we can never tell unless we keep doing it right? Instead of being upset that I’m not very good now, I decided to try and look forward to how good I eventually will be. I find that prospect exciting! We never know how much we grow until we get there, it’s like a happy surprise! ^\\\^✨And in the meantime, I am allowed to be perfectly happy with what I already can do. How far I’ve already come. Even if other people tell me otherwise, even if it’s true that it’s not very great, who’s to say that I will always be? Not me, that’s for sure.
I am willing to be patient for the sake of what I do, because I am willing to do it for an eternity.
There is no race in doing what I love, because I am the only one on this path. I can see other people on their own paths too! And sometimes they’re faster and have way better stamina than me, but their final destination is ultimately going to be much much different than mine, even if we’re going in a similar direction. So there is no point in trying to match them; I decide to walk at my own pace. It’s much easier for me this way. Take breaks! Drink some water. We’ve all got our places to go. ^\\\^
Third thing about getting things done is, well, getting it done! Do you know how I wrote “A Cup of Coffee”? I pain stakingly stared at it all day with frequent breaks in between, read it a ridiculous amount of times until it didn’t sound like english, and had text to speech read it back to me a couple more times just so I could make sure, because I really really really wanted to finish it. And it probably was kind of messy, hahaha. >\\\<
I’m not suggesting you do what I did btw, because it’s not even how I always write things! My other story “Table for Two” was written under a much different context. For that one, I wrote parts of it on different days. I took walks thinking about how I’d word things, how I’d imagine the scene going, and how I should pace sentences. I actually deleted the entire first paragraph and started over a few times because it didn’t sound right. Then one afternoon I decided that I wanted this story done. So I sat down and did what I could, edited a few things afterwards, and tentatively showed it to a friend. I didn’t edit it much after that, but it was done!
If I learned anything from highschool, it’s that doing something imperfectly is better than not doing it at all. I’m still a pretty picky perfectionist and a terrible procrastinator, and it’s not easy! But I would much prefer something I make to be “messy but complete”, rather than “pretty good so far but not finished”. Personally for me, getting started is the hardest part of doing anything. I have yet to find an easier way to do it, but I know that sometimes I just need to sit down and do what I can to start writing. If a sentence sounds weird, I keep going, because I can come back to it later! But if a sentence doesn’t exist, I can’t fix that without, well, writing it. o///o So I consider that a start!
I definitely understand you when you say that you can’t get yourself to write because I currently kind of can’t either. >\\\< I have outlines that I won’t ever write, I have ideas that I’m not gonna get to, and I’ve got fics that I worry won’t be as good when I write them. But maybe today I’ll sit myself down and just write one sentence. Give it a title, make a document, and stare for a lil bit. Give it a beginning. Because for me, sometimes drawing the starting line somewhere helps. Maybe it can show me what direction I need to go in just a little bit clearer. u///u
At the end of the day, the thing I say all the time is enjoy what you do. It’s just genuinely the most important part of doing anything to me. Yes it can be hard and sometimes we worry about how it’s gonna be, but we still do it don’t we? We come back and try again because we love it. Because we really can’t live without it. So what’s wrong with just...doing it?
That’s how it is to be a creator for me, I suppose. And from one to another, I genuinely wish you the best of luck on your journey!!
After all, there will be no other quite like it. u///u💖✨
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