#i miss playing in sand pits i wish there was a way for me to play in one now

[autistickaitovocaloid]

Thinking about how the same words can have different connotations. Like yeah sand box sounds fine but sand pit? Sounds way cooler, almost kind of ominous.

#art talks about stuff #like maybe i'm biased because i've always known it as a sand pit #i miss playing in sand pits i wish there was a way for me to play in one now #''just go to the beach" it's not the same #like i get why high schools don't have sand pits the way primary schools do but #they should #imo

[dandelions-143]

Who’s Gonna Hold You like me? Nofuckinbody

Part 1

Part 2

This one’s kind of sad/dramatic but there will be more parts to it.

Pairing: Idol Changbin x f!reader

Genre: Friends to Friends with benefits to nothing

Warnings: not much, cussing, a little drinking, it just ends sad… for now

Summary: You’re friends with Idol Changbin. You spend as much time together as possible. It’s always a fun time with him. Late nights sneaking out doing things you know would get you both in trouble but, it also feels like Changbin is stringing you along in some ways and it gets to you… coming to a bow up after so long of holding it in.

Masterlist

(Did not proofread… sorry!! Also likes and reblogs are highly appreciated!!)

He had all the car windows down. The wind combing through your hair. The music was up loud and he was speeding down the coast towards the beach. You looked over and a ghost of a smile played upon his lips. He was beautiful, sweet, gentle, and a little wild. Changbin was not suppose to be out right now, he had a busy schedule as an idol. A strict schedule nearly daily and he always stuck to that except late at night.

He would come and pick you up in his new car he recently bought. You would run out of your front door adrenaline pumping through your veins at the sight of him and the fact that if he got caught sneaking out of his dorm or if he got caught with you it could possibly mean real trouble for him. Changbin didn’t care, he wanted to spend every night he could with you and his friends.

Changbin was a bit of a bad boy, taking you to abandon places that had no trespassing signs just so you two could stay out all night drinking, dancing crazy to the muffled playlist coming from your phone, sharing heated kisses, and needy touches. Or he would hop a fence and sneak you into a hotel swimming pool to go skinny dipping after pool hours. And then sometimes he would just take you to a party with his friends from his past.

Like tonight he was taking you to the beach which was closed after sundown but there was a bonfire happening and he had pretty much begged you to go with him. Now, even though you two spent most nights together he had only ever kissed you, he never tried to do more than that even though you wished he would cross that line.. you would beg for it if it wouldn’t be humiliating. So you two stayed friends that would sometimes make out.

You craved his attention. You loved the way he would look at you sometimes as if he knew a secret that you didn’t. That little cocky smirk he got when you would tell him a dirty joke you heard, like you could see the smutty thoughts flowing through his mind. You touched yourself to the thought of him. You just wanted him always and tonight was going to be the night you told him exactly how you felt and what you wanted.

Changbin walked a little ahead of you as you both walked from the parking lot onto the still warm sand. He grabbed your wrist lightly pulling you along, “Hurry, so we can get a good cold drink.” You only smiled and picked up the pace. “Patience Changbin, the party wont leave. It’s still going to be there, also I’m a bit nervous. These people are all your friends I wont know anyone there.” You said as you walked up beside him and Changbin dropped your wrist, which you instantly missed the warmth of his large hand on your skin.

“No, no, don’t get insecure now. You’re the funnest person I know and the prettiest.” He put his hands on your shoulders to make you look at him. “Just be yourself and people will love you, just as I do.” You know he didn’t mean it the way you wanted him to mean it but a small bloom of hope began in the pit of your stomach. Maybe he will reciprocate my feelings… you thought to yourself as his warm brown eyes searched yours.

You opened your mouth to begin to convey that you really wanted to tell him something important but of course a couple of his friends spotted you both and began to yell for you two to come over.

The closer you got to the party the louder the chatter and music became. The fire was huge and blazing in the middle of this dug out pit causing the warm summer night to feel even more warm. You followed Changbin as he greeted a bunch of people. And you didn’t expect Changbin to introduce you exactly but, you felt a little awkward when he began conversations and didn’t even acknowledge you were standing right beside him. What’s up with him, he never treats you like this. You question in your head but chose to just go with it. You didn’t mind being a wallflower as long as you were with him.

Eventually you two made your way to where the drinks were and he did grab two drinks, one for you and one for himself. Changbin turned to you as he sipped on his beer, “Are you okay?” You nodded and drank some of your beer. You winced at the bitter taste as it slid down your throat. You thought that if you just had a little liquid courage maybe you would loosen up and not be so uptight.

You watched as Changbin flitted around like a social butterfly. He was in his element, talking to everyone he knew and even people he didn’t know. The more awkward you felt the more you drank and only two hours in you had drank two beers and you were on your third. You weren’t sure where Changbin had run off to but it was pissing you off at this point.

He had never treated you like this, he had never left you to just fend for yourself with people you didn’t know. He was always there, a comfort for you. And yes, maybe you should be more independent but you came out to be with him not strangers.

Fuck it.. I’m going to dance. I can’t just stand here alone anymore. The thought crossed your mind as you finished that third beer and you just chucked the empty bottle in the sand before walking over to a spot near the fire where the music was blasting the loudest. You were not the most coordinated but you were buzzed enough to not care anymore.

You let the music just move you, not caring what you looked like to the other party goers around. Then suddenly a pair of hands engulfed your hips and you smirked thinking maybe Changbin had seen you and decided to join you but, when you turned around it was not him. The guy that was dancing with you was a tall, slim man that had dyed dark blue curly hair. He was cute but, not the one you wanted to be dancing with.

“No thanks” you said to the guy, your words slurring ever so slightly. “I want to be dancing with Changbin.” You said out loud, your inner thoughts slipping free of your usually guarded mouth. The man didn’t seem offended he nodded and pointed in the direction of the water where it was darker and more quiet. “I saw him head out there with a friend, I think.”

So you began to walk in that direction, all the while muttering to yourself how you were just going to tell him. Tell him everything. As you walked you could see a figure sitting down in the sand by the water. The waves crashing on the shore but not quite reaching him. You couldn’t help but smile as his figure grew larger and you could see that little smirk you loved on his lips.

“Hey, I -“ you began as you plopped down beside him on the sand. Changbin looked startled. His eyes growing a bit wide and he kept glancing out at the ocean. You were too tipsy to really notice what or who he was looking at until you heard a girls voice calling to him. “Binnie! It’s so cold!” The girl yelled as she came running up to him, soaking wet and only in her bra and panties.

You froze, your eyes looking at the girl who was now wrapping herself up in his jacket. You then looked over at Changbin and he couldn’t look you in the face. “Binnie, who’s this?” She innocently asked. Before Binnie could utter a word you shoved him and you shoved him hard. His muscly body was not easy to move but you were pissed, more so than you had ever been in your entire life.

“What the fuck, Changbin! You ditched me to come out here with her! And who the fuck calls you Binnie. No one calls you that!” You were yelling now and it took a second try but you stumbled to your feet. “I can’t fucking believe you!” You began to storm off in the opposite direction of the bonfire but Changbin followed you. You could hear his foot steps in the sand behind you.

“Come on, don’t be mad. I expected you to do the same. This is a party after all. It’s what people do. They hook up!” Changbin grabbed your arm gently, making you stop. You couldn’t take it anymore, the tears were rushing down your cheeks now, hot against the salty breeze coming off of the ocean. As you whirled around. You forcefully shook his hand off of you, “But I came here with you! I don’t want anyone else…”

Your voice was shaky and not as loud as it was before. You felt defeated and embarrassed that this was how your feelings came out to him. In a rush.. a drunken rush. “Oh come on, y/n. We aren’t dating. It’s not like we have an obligation to only be with one another.” Changbin blurted out, his eyes trained on you making you even more self conscious. You took a step back upon hearing his harsh words.

Slowly nodding in realization, “So none of it meant anything to you…” You watched his face fall a bit then he shook his head rapidly, “That’s not what I meant!” He yelled, anger seeping into his voice. “No! You don’t get to be mad, Changbin. All the sneaking out, the late night secrets, the heated kisses, staying up all night to watched the sunrise..may not have meant anything to you but, it meant EVERYTHING to me!”

Reaching up to tug at your hair in frustration you began to cry a little more. Maybe it was the alcohol but your emotions are running very high. You aren’t sobbing but the overwhelming urge to just sit in the sand and cry was very appealing. “You can’t tell me you didn’t feel it too.. that buzz between us. The way you look at me sometimes.. like you know.. like you feel it too.” Your voice was softer now, broken as you cried softly.

“Y/n, please don’t cry.” Changbin came to your side and gently took your wrists to pull you into his chest. He wrapped his arms around you to give you one of his protective hugs that you loved so much. It would be easy to just fall back into it again. To let him comfort you and nothing would change. That would be the issue.. nothing would change.

In that moment you made a decision, you were going to choose you this time. No more chasing after a man who clearly was not going to do more than just string you along. “Stop.” You mumbled just as he kissed your forehead and you stepped out of his hold. “No more, I don’t want to stop seeing you but, all of this can’t be one sided. I can’t be strung along anymore. You may not realize what you’re doing but it’s very clear to me now. I’m just someone to touch and kiss and be with when you’re lonely.”

Changbin began to speak but you held up your hand to silence him. “This hurts, I don’t want to stop this but, it hurts more knowing I’m giving you all of me when I will only ever get the pieces of you that you want to give away.” You shook your head as you began to walk backwards. “Don’t call me, don’t text me. This stops now. I wont be a convenience anymore.” Now you were sobbing heavily and you could see the reality hit Changbin. That you really meant what you were saying.

Before you turned around to walk away, “I’m done waiting for you to feel the way I do.” You didn’t say goodbye, you simply turned away from him and walked back to the parking lot. After the car you had ordered came to pick you up and you were on your way back home is when you allowed yourself to break down. The man driving probably thought you were insane but your body had to let it out.

It was like experiencing a death. Your entire body felt it. You cried hard but, tried to stay as silent as possible. Your shoulders shaking as the tears fell, wetting not only your cheeks but, also streaming down your chin and neck, dripping onto your shirt. You had fallen for Changbin slowly and then rapidly, head over heels and this was the hardest thing you had ever had to do. You loved him but, he didn’t love you the way you needed.

You should have been proud of yourself for putting your heart first but all you could think was.. how would you live your days without him.. and then in the back of your mind you hoped maybe this would make him realize he needed you too.

#stray kids #changbin #skz #changbin skz #skz changbin #stray kids changbin #seo changbin #binnie #Binnie skz #skz imagines #skz scenarios #changbin imagines #changbin scenarios #stray kids x you #stray kids x reader #stray kids x y/n #changbin x reader #changbin x you #changbin x y/n #changbin x female reader #skz x y/n #skz x you #skz x reader #skz fanfic #stray kids fanfic #stray kids fantasy au #skz fantasy au #Spotify

[dream-a-little-bigger-x]

You’re The Reason | Eric Matthews

Add yourself to my taglist! | Here’s my masterlist!

Requested: Yes/No

A/N: My first Boy Meets World fic! Gah! I hope you like this! Couldn’t stay away from the JATP boys though, so it’s kinda like a JATP x BMW crossover... Lemme know what you think! 

Pairing: Eric x Fem!Reader

Song(s) used: none

Warnings: mentions of alcohol, party

Words: 4,028

Eric Matthews. The goofy, charming oldest boy of Alan and Amy. My best friend since forever. Our parents always told us the story about how we met in the sandbox in Kindergarten. I was building sandcastles when Jason, Eric’s first best friend, came to ruin them. Eric, being the charmer he always had been, told Jason off and pushed him out of the sandbox before helping me rebuild my sand castle. Ever since that day, the two of us had been the best of friends. 

We did everything together. Everything from play dates to eating ice cream to going to middle school and eventually high school. Though we never graduated together as my parents had to move when I was 16. We moved to Los Angeles and never returned to Philadelphia. Eric and I were so torn. We had promised we would keep in contact and the first few months were hard, but we eventually found a rhythm in our long-distance friendship. 

Every evening, we would call each other except for the weekends as those were date-weekends where both of us went out on dates. But come Sunday evening, we’d both be on the phone, telling the other what had happened during said dates. 

During summer vacation, Eric would come to L.A. to visit me or I’d go back to Philly, just so we could hang out together for a few days. Those had always been my favorite days. We’d reconnect and find that spark again we always used to have, which, in its turn, brought us closer and made the next few months a little less hard when all we could hear was each other’s voice. 

Last summer, however, I realized that I’d rather kiss those beautiful pink lips than stare at them as he talked about yet another girl he took out over the weekend and made out with. It stung, to say the least, but I couldn’t tell him how I felt. We were miles apart from one another, it would just hurt more. 

Though what hurt even worse was when Eric called me one time in the middle of the night, crying. Confused and worried, I listened to him as he let everything he was feeling out of his system. 

“Mister Feeny is retiring, Cory’s going to college and eloped with Topanga tonight and I just– everything’s changing and I don’t know what to do about it. I wanna stop time and just go back to the way things were. All of us in high school, Cory and Topanga fighting over God-knows-what or Shawn and Cory getting into even more trouble. And you… Not miles away from me…” 

I choked back tears as I listened to him. He sounded so broken, so lost. I wished I could just hold him and let him cry as he spoke about how he felt. I wished I was in Philadelphia instead of Los Feliz, a place I didn’t quite belong. 

“I’m sorry, Eric, I wish I could make things better for you…” I said, my voice just above a whisper, afraid I would cry if I spoke any louder. 

Eric sighed on the other side of the line. “Why don’t you just– come home? Study at Pennbrook with me?” I stuttered and stumbled over my words, unsure what to say to him. 

It wasn’t like I thought about it. I’m an adult, I could change my whole life around and move back to Philadelphia. Back to Eric. But while that sounded all beautiful and wonderful and like a dream come true, I couldn’t just drop everything here. I had my new friends, a college degree I needed to finish. 

“Come on, babe. You know you want to…” Eric pleaded, knowing all-too-well what was going on in my mind right now even though he couldn’t see me. “I know I want you to.” 

I heaved in a deep breath. “I can’t, Eric… I gotta finish my degree here. I gotta–” Just as I wanted to continue summing up reasons as to why I wouldn’t be able to go back to him, four guys I knew like the back of my hand entered my dorm and jumped onto my bed. I didn’t even need to see who it was to know who it was. “Guys– I’m on the phone here,” I scolded them as the floppy-haired guy gave me his best smoulder. “Lukas, no.” 

“It’s alright, y/n,” I heard Eric say, though I could tell it wasn’t actually okay. “You go back to your friends. You stay put. Okay? Whatever makes you happiest.” 

“But you make me h–” Before I could even finish my sentence, Eric had hung up the phone. “Happiest…” I mumbled before placing the horn back on the receiver. 

“You okay?” the  blonde guy I knew best as Alex Mercer asked me solemnly. 

I pressed my lips together. “No– not really…” 

Luke wrapped his arms around my waist and snuggled into my neck while Reggie sat on the end of my bed with his legs crossed. “I think you ought to go visit him,” he said. 

“What?”

“No, seriously. You miss him, he misses you and you clearly need each other right now. Go back to Philly, y/n. Even if it’s just for the weekend.” For once, Reggie actually spoke some sense. 

“Yeah, I mean, you clearly miss each other and you need each other right now. And maybe, whilst you’re there, you can figure out whether you’d wanna move back to Philly or come back to us,” Alex added. 

I had met Luke, Reggie, Alex and Bobby during orientation day, along with Rose, my roommate. There hadn’t been a day where we didn’t spend time together. All six of us were sewn to the hip. Wherever one went, the others went too. A lot of people called Rose and I their groupies as the four of them had started a band way back in high school. If I didn’t know any better, I’d say those four were actually married to one another. 

But to be fair, Alex and Reggie were speaking some truth now. I did miss Eric. I missed him tremendously. And maybe, once there, I could see that Los Angeles was truly where I belonged or if I should stay in Philadelphia with Eric… It was the ultimate life test. 

I heaved in a deep breath before lifting my hand to ring the doorbell at apartment 3E. Nerves bunched in the pit of my stomach and my hands were getting clammy. I wasn’t even sure if Eric was home. I wasn’t even sure if coming over was such a splendid idea. I wasn’t sure of anything anymore. 

Even less so when a tall fiery red-haired girl opened up the door. My throat dried up for a second. Did I get the wrong apartment? Eric hadn’t told me about a girl roommate or anything. All I knew was that he lived with Jack and Shawn. Though I figured since Shawn had gotten into Pennbrook too, he might’ve moved into a dorm with Cory. 

“Hi, can I–” the girl stopped in her tracks as she let her eyes glide over me. “You’re y/n, aren’t you?” Her lips curled up into a smile. “Eric has told me so much about you!” 

The nerves in my stomach made room for fluttery butterflies. Eric talked about me. Even to girls as pretty as this one. Knowing Eric the way I do, I didn’t think he ever would. ‘Girl repellant’ he’d call it. 

“Uhm… Yeah… I wanted to surprise him… Is he here?” 

The girl chuckled. “Believe it or not, but he’s actually in class right now.” 

“Eric? In class?” 

She nodded her head, her lips curling up into a smirk. “I’m heading to campus now, you wanna come? His class is almost over.” 

It definitely beat sitting here, waiting for him. 

“Sure,” I replied and the girl quickly went to grab her stuff before walking out and guiding me towards the elevator again. 

“I’m Rachel, by the way. I just moved in a couple days ago,” she said while pushing the button to call the elevator. 

Rachel. Roommate Rachel. She was definitely Eric’s type… A girl. 

“Eric hasn’t told me about you yet. For a second, I thought I was at the wrong apartment,” I said, chuckling a little. 

Rachel and I got into the elevator and she told me about how she wound up living with Jack and Eric. I had to admit to myself that I was only slightly jealous of the moves the two boys had made on her. Not that I cared about Jack hitting on Rachel, but I did care about Eric doing it. 

The red-haired fury led me towards campus and we talked all the way there. Mostly about Eric. She asked me questions about our childhood and I told her every single story about him. It wasn’t hard talking about Eric. Everything we went through together flowed out of me like a waterfall. A waterfall of Eric-filled stories. 

“Oh, look. He’s at the Student Union, as predicted,” Rachel said, pointing towards where Eric, Jack, Shawn and Cory were seated on the sofas, sipping coffee. 

A smile involuntarily crept its way up to my face. Eric Matthews. Seeing him now made my heart beat faster and my stomach fill up with all sorts of butterflies. My LA boys were right. I did miss him tremendously. 

“Come on, let’s go say hi!” Rachel urged, pulling me along by my wrist. 

“Don’t you have a class to go to?” 

She shook her red mane. “I’d rather see this beautiful reunion,” she said. 

Cory was the first one who met my eyes. His laughter made room for confusion to then turn into delight. “Y/N?” he exclaimed, causing everyone’s head to turn my way before he got up to embrace me. Jack and Shawn hugged me next and when I turned to Eric, he was still seated on the couch with his cup of coffee halfway to his lips. 

“What are you doing here?” he finally asked. 

I tucked a strand of hair behind my ear nervously. “What? Aren’t you happy to see me?” 

His wide eyes turned back to normal and as he put his cup on the coffee table in front of him, he blabbed while getting up to hug me. “Wha– of course I’m happy to see you, y/n. I just didn’t expect you to come? Don’t you have classes and stuff?”  

I inhaled the familiar scent of Eric Matthews. As my senses filled up with him, my nerves finally calmed down. I was home. 

“I wanted to surprise you…” 

His hands cupped my face as he regarded me. He inspected every inch of my face as if to see if I was complete and really there. “And surprised I am,” he whispered. 

Shawn handed me a cup of coffee as we all settled back onto the couch. They asked me questions about LA and about college in LA, and I answered each and every one of them. It felt good being with this gang again. It was like coming back home. 

Eric took me everywhere that weekend. Friday night, we went to Chubbie’s. On Saturday, he took me back home where I reacquainted with Alan and Amy, and we spent some time with Morgan. 

Now it was Saturday night and we were all at the club for a good party. I was three drinks in and chatting with Rachel at the bar. I had grown close to her over the two days I had been here. Just like Rose, she always knew exactly what to say. And she listened. She listened to all my sorrows and worries. She really listened. 

“I think you’re in love with Eric,” she stated before taking a swig of her beer. 

“What? No! I–” She raised an eyebrow at me. “I am in love with Eric…” 

She let out a cackle. “Ha! I knew it!” 

“I can’t act up on my feelings though, Rachel. We live miles apart. Being friends is already hard enough, I don’t even wanna know what being a couple would do to us. If Eric would reciprocate my feelings, that is.” 

“Would you believe me if I told you Eric is in love with you too?” 

“No.” 

“Well, he is! The way his eyes light up when he talks about you… It’s pure love. Sure, he can be a bit daft and he’s not the sharpest tool in the shed, but when he talks about you, he almost becomes poetic.” 

“You’re ridiculous,” I said and sipped from my beer again. 

Rachel shook her head at me. “See for yourself.” She pointed somewhere behind me and the second I turned around, Eric was in front of me with those big, sparkly eyes of his and that goofy smile I’d come to love. 

“Dance with me, baby!” he shouted and pulled me along to the dance floor. As I looked back at Rachel, she gave me a knowing look. She wasn’t right. She couldn’t be. 

“I need you to stay,” he slurred, clearly having drank one too many beers. “Please, can’t you stay?” 

“Eric,” I sighed, “You know I can’t. I’ve got –” 

“A degree to finish and friends to go back to, I know, I know…” 

I pressed my lips together in a thin line as I watched him. He was still moving, swaying from side to side to the music, but there was a lot less enthusiasm behind than before we started talking. 

“Hey,” I started and placed my hands on his shoulders. “You know I would stay if I could, right? I just – I can’t, Eric.” 

“Yes, you can, y/n. You can stay here, transfer to Pennbrook, live with me and Jack and Rachel. Be here. With me.” 

His offer sounded alluring. A little too alluring. The alcohol coursing in my veins almost made me say ‘yes’, but the sober part of me knew that wouldn’t be a good idea. “I need a better reason than that, Eric.”

“I’ve got more reasons for you to stay.” 

“Gimme one.” 

Before I could properly process what was happening, Eric grabbed my face and pressed his lips to mine in a deep kiss. As we pulled apart for a moment, I had to take a breather and process what had just happened. 

“That’s a good reason,” I whispered before kissing him again. 

I didn’t know if it was the alcohol or the fact that we’d actually wanted to do that for a long time, but the rest of the night we spent together, making out in a corner of the club until Rachel and Jack pulled us apart and brought us back to the apartment. Eric and I fell asleep together on the couch, cuddled up. The place where I’d wanted to fall asleep for months now. The place where I belonged.

It felt weird waking up in his arms. Not that we hadn’t done that before, but the events that preceded it were new. I hadn’t ever been kissed the way Eric had kissed me last night. It was with so much passion and love that filled up all my senses, that sobered me up almost straight away. 

Though, when he woke, it was like nothing happened. 

He didn’t speak about it, and changed the subject whenever I tried to. I didn’t know what had gone wrong. It was probably a mistake on his part. He probably didn’t want to kiss me. It was probably the alcohol speaking and not his heart. He didn’t love me the same way I loved him. 

It was all a mistake. 

“How was your night?” Alan asked playfully when we entered the Matthews’ kitchen for lunch on Sunday. 

“Good! We had fun,” I replied and glanced over at Eric. He had jammed his hands into the pockets of his jeans as he moved over towards the fridge. 

“It was okay,” he spoke and shoved a knife right through my chest. 

I had no clue what I had done wrong or what had gone wrong. All I knew was that Eric was giving me the cold shoulder. The kiss must’ve been a mistake. It must’ve been something he didn’t even want to do and it was just the alcohol taking over. And now it had ruined our entire friendship. 

“When’s your flight back home?” Amy queried. 

I placed my knife and fork down as I had just finished the delicious lunch Amy had made all of us. “Tonight at eight,” I responded with a nervous smile. My stomach churned when I felt Eric tense up next to me. 

“Back to Northridge then, huh? Must be a big change going from cold Philadelphia back to warm and sunny LA,” Alan said with a smile and I nodded my head. 

“It’s gonna be quite the di–” before I could finish my sentence, Eric had shoved his chair back and without uttering a word, he stormed out of the kitchen. I could feel my heart break in my chest. He seemed angry. Frustrated. All of the things I didn’t want him to be before I went back to LA.

“I’ll go check on him,” I said and carefully slid my chair back before following Eric outside. 

He sat on the cushioned bench where we have had many a talk before as the sun set and the stars appeared into the sky. Though right now, it seemed awfully dark and gloomy. Nothing like what it used to feel like. 

“Eric, are you okay?” I plopped down next to him, placing my hand on his shoulder. 

He scoffed. “No, I’m not okay. You know, I didn’t ask you to come here. I didn’t ask you to visit me. I didn’t ask and so I couldn’t prepare for you to leave… Again.” 

“Eric, I’m sorry. I thought it would be nice to surprise you. I–” I stopped talking as soon as he shot up from the bench and took a few steps away from me. He looked angry and sad at the same time and it broke my heart even further. 

“Don’t you know how much it kills me to see you go every time? But at least in the summer, I can prep myself for the goodbye that’s about to follow. I can prep myself for the heartache and now that I didn’t see it coming, I’m not ready for you to go.” 

I opened my mouth to say something else, but before I could, he gave me another glare and then stormed off to God-knows-where. I couldn’t move. I was frozen to the bench. My best friend just yelled at me and ran off. I didn’t even say goodbye to him. 

“Miss y/l/n, what a surprise,” a familiar voice sounded, causing me to snap my head towards the older man that stood in the next-door garden on the other side of the white fence. 

I smiled at him, but I knew it wasn’t genuine and I knew he knew it wasn’t. “Hey Mister Feeny.” 

“Are you okay?” he asked and opened the small gate. He made a beeline towards me and sat down on the bench next to me. 

I heaved in a deep breath, breathing in the familiarity of my old teacher. “No, I –” I mulled over my words. “I missed Eric, so I came to surprise him but I think it might’ve not been such a good idea.” 

“Why not?”

“‘Cause now he’s mad at me because he couldn’t prepare himself for me leaving…” I mumbled, focusing on the rings on my fingers as I twisted them around and around. “I don’t know what to do, Mister Feeny. I wanna stay with Eric, but I’ve got a life in LA. I’ve got friends and I’ve got Northridge and my family still lives there too…” 

I looked up to see my favorite teacher regard me with such a tender and familiar look. He felt sorry for me and I also knew there was a  pep-talk coming in a few seconds. Though at that moment, I wasn’t sure if I was in the mood for that pep-talk. 

“I’m going to tell you the same thing I told Miss Lawrence when she came to me with her dilemma,” he started wistfully, the only way Mister Feeny ever spoke. “You stay at Northridge unless you have a good reason not to.” 

My mind immediately went to last night’s events when Eric kissed me after he told me he had reasons for me to stay. If I had a reason, it would be Eric. Eric would be the one and only reason for me to move back to Philadelphia and I couldn’t lie when I said Eric weighs out every other reason I had for going back to LA. 

“I think you know what to do, Miss y/l/n,” he said before placing a comforting hand on my shoulder and getting up again. 

“Hey, Mister Feeny,” he stopped halfway to his house. “You’re a good teacher, you know that?” The genuine and heartwarming smile that curled Feeny’s lips upwards made me feel nostalgic. I had missed that man. 

“Thank you, Miss y/l/n. And you’re a good student.” 

As Mister Feeny returned to his home, I couldn’t help but think everything over. Every thought, every moment of the past weekend seeped back into my mind. There was only one way to stop my thoughts and I knew exactly what it was.  

“Y/N?” His voice caused me to snap out of my thoughts. There he was. Finally. “What are you still doing here?” he asked, visibly getting nervous. “I thought you’d gone home?” 

 I patted the spot next to me on the cushioned bench. Eric hesitantly took the spot, but I could tell he was tense and didn’t quite know what to do. He didn’t look at me and his hands fiddled around in his lap. 

“I am home.” 

Now he looked up at me. Confusion was written all over his face, a look I had seen on him before. The reminder of everything I ever told him that confused him made me giggle a little. 

“What do you mean? Don’t you have to get back to LA? Back home?” He turned his face back to the sky. It was starting to get dark out and the stars above us were starting to make an appearance, along with the bright moon. 

“I talked to Feeny and he told me that I should go back to Northridge…” I watched Eric’s jaw clench. “Unless I had a good reason not to.” 

He turned his head to face me again. “Is there a good reason?” 

I sighed. “I thought about it. I’ve got reasons to go back. Like my degree and my friends out there, my family…” Eric slowly nodded his head and I knew his mind was already preparing him for me to say I was going to go back. “But there’s one reason that makes me wanna stay here. One reason that outweighs all the other reasons.”

“And what’s that?” 

A soft smile befell my lips as I leaned in and cautiously pressed my lips to his. Last night’s memories seeped back into my mind. 

“You’re the reason, Eric Matthews.” 

He smiled as his eyes darted from mine to my lips and back before he fully kissed me on the lips. I couldn’t help but giggle before melting completely into the kiss, into him. After years of being best friends and months of pining for him, I was finally kissing my best friend. I had finally given into my feelings. 

And I was making the right decision. I knew that now. I knew that moving back to Philadelphia would be the right choice. I would be moving back home. Back with Eric. Close to Cory and Shawn and Jack and Topanga. All of my friends from when we were younger. Home. 

The only thing left to do now was break the news to my friends in LA… 

But that was a problem for later. 

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#boy meets world #eric matthews #eric matthews x reader #eric matthews x fem!reader #eric matthews fic #jatp x bmw #jatp x bmw crossover #cw: alcohol #cw: party

[ruzek-halstead]

the way you move is like a full-on rainstorm (and i’m a house of cards)

outer banks • jiara • post-season two • fluff with a sprinkle of angst

In the beginning, the idea of a deserted island to themselves sounds like a paradise.

No parents, no rules, no murders — just each other and a fierce determination to get back what's theirs.

In theory, that was great, but it doesn't take long before a sinking feeling settles in the pit of Kiara's stomach. She thinks about the similar feeling of despair her parents must be feeling at her disappearance and it's paralyzing. She isn't sure if the others notice her change in behaviour —  Kiara thinks they're just happy to be alive, after so many close calls.

Kiara doesn't understand how the gravity of what they've faced doesn't hit them now that they're alone and stranded.

Don't get her wrong, Kiara is always down for anything, especially if it's for her friends. Her loyalty knows no bounds, and she doesn't regret a single moment, but now that she has the time to reflect, she isn't sure how to process it.

They almost died.

JJ almost died.

She understands they're just happy to have made it out alive, but Kiara can't forget the fact that they almost didn't.

Sometimes when she sleeps at night, it isn't the chilly breeze or the uncomfortable sand that keeps her awake. It's the fact that every time she closes her eyes, she feels like she's underwater again, being dragged under by the dead weight of her best friend. She can't un-see it, she can't forget about it, and it's making it incredibly difficult for her to move on.

Kiara quickly realizes the water doesn't just affect her when she closes her eyes. Every time she moves to enjoy the benefits of an ocean six feet away, her legs stop moving as soon as her toes merely dip into the water. She hasn't been able to have a proper swim and it doesn't take her long to figure it out; so, she just stays away from the ocean, unless it is to cleanse her skin. Even then, she can't go too far.

The fact that JJ acts like he didn't nearly have a brush with death doesn't help her anxiety.

He acts like his normal carefree and reckless self, and don't get Kiara wrong, it's one of the things she adores about him. But she can't look at him the same anymore. His head wound was serious and they had no medical supplies to treat it. Sometimes Kiara watches him carefully, watches his movements because sometimes, she catches the way he wavers when he stands and needs to blink multiple times to even take a step forward. But then he's running with the boys, eagerly tackling each other and Kiara cringes every time his head connects with various hard surfaces.

It's painful to watch, and the fear that something serious is wrong but they have no way of knowing is sometimes too much for Kiara. That, piled with her nightmares and her conflicted feelings about her parents, is enough to dissipative any joy she might feel about a deserted island with her best friends.

It's only been a few days since they've arrived onto the island, and Kiara isn't sure her friends have caught onto her standoffish behaviour. It should hurt a bit, but Kiara can't bring herself to care.

When they decide to hop into the ocean for a late-afternoon swim, Kiara mumbles an excuse and hangs back, watching them from afar. She's sat against a tree, her knees pulled up to her chest as she watches. The jealousy hits her square in the chest and she's slightly angry her body doesn't allow her to join in on the fun. She doesn't know how to get over her new fear of water; the images of JJ's bloodied blonde hair against her skin, trying to stay afloat, haven't disappeared from her mind, and she's beginning to fear they never will.

Kiara is so deeply stuck in her thoughts that she doesn't even notice JJ stepping out of the ocean and approaching her.

When he sits down next to her, he's soaking wet, but the hot sun is quickly drying out the droplets scattered along his bare chest. He reaches for a split coconut and offers it to Kiara; she shakes her head so he takes a small sip.

"So," JJ starts, clearing his throat. "Are you going to tell me what's up?"

Kiara doesn't take JJ for the most perceptive out of their group, but he always seems to surprise her. Perhaps just how she's been keeping an eye on him since they arrived on this island, he was doing the same with her.

"Silence isn't a good look on you, Kie," he says, and Kiara realizes she failed to reply to his question. He's not wrong either. Kiara isn't exactly known for being quiet — rather, she's known for her passionate rants about the environment, turtles and the abhorrence of single use plastic. She hasn't been feeling any of that lately; she hasn't been feeling herself at all lately. "I'm not blind, you know. I can see something's up."

Kiara shrugs, because she truly doesn't feel like talking, and she can feel JJ's eyes burning a hole into the side of her face. How does she explain to her best friend that every time she looks at him, she pictures his unconscious, bruised and bleeding body?

"Kie," JJ sighs, quieter this time. "I'm starting to get worried."

The softness and sincerity in his voice causes her to look over, and she almost wishes she hadn't. His eyes are the brightest blue with the sun shining down on them, his hair messy and pulled back and a slight frown etched on his pink lips, that he bites anxiously.

"I'm just starting to miss home," Kiara replies, and it isn't a lie, per say, but it isn't the entire truth either.

JJ seems a little relieved he's managed to get something out of her, but his eyes stare at her as if he's expecting her to say more. "Okay, and what else?" Kiara's head swivels around to look at him questioningly. "Kie," he starts exasperatedly, "You've barely stepped into the ocean since we've gotten here and you've been so closed off. Seriously, what's going on with you?"

Her jaw locks and her eyes harden for a reason she can't determine. This is what she wanted, for someone to notice, to care about what the hell was going on with her. But her throat is burning, and she's selfish because all she wants to do is scream at him — scream at him because she's like this because of him.

Deep down she knows she doesn't regret jumping overboard to save him for even a second. She doesn't. But she resents him for putting her in that position in the first place, for jumping to her defence and getting hurt, for being the bravest friend she'd ever had. It's starting to make her brain hurt; she plans to avoid this conversation at all costs.

"I already told you," Kiara mumbles, standing up and dusting the sand off the back of her shorts. She ignores the pleading look in JJ's eyes. "I miss home, that's all."

Kiara turns to walk further into the trees, farther from where her best friends are screaming in utter happiness with each other. She nearly expects JJ to give up and go back into the ocean, allowing her some time for herself. But when she turns to look at him approaching with heavy footsteps, his expression is tight, angry even, and his jaw is clenched as he stares at her.

"Kiara, I'm not playing this game with you," JJ rumbles, and Kiara knows he means it by the use of her full name. "And I'm not leaving here until you tell me what the hell is wrong with you."

Kiara's fists clench at her sides and JJ's eyes drop to them. "You want to know what's wrong with me, JJ?" She spits, feeling the fire spread through her veins and into her brown eyes. She steps to him and continues, "Why don't we talk about you instead, huh?"

"What?" JJ responds, clearly confused. "Kie—"

"No, JJ! Let's talk about you!" Kiara snaps, continuing to step into his space. JJ doesn't step back, and his expression only darkens. "Let's talk about how you're pretending you're fine, but you're clearly fucking not! I see you, JJ! I see you when you stand up too fast and it takes you a full minute to get your shit together. You're obviously hurt but you act like it's nothing! What if you hit your head again? What then? We don't have a doctor — we can't save you again, JJ!"

JJ's expression is calculating, trying to gauge what this actually has to do with Kiara's new behaviour. He spots her trembling bottom lip when she says they can't save him again. He knows she means herself, because she's the one who saved him, no one else.

"Kie, I'm fine. Sure, it's a little sore, but I'm not going to stop living my life because of a little injury. I've had worse, Kie, and you know it."

Kiara nearly growls in response.

"Seriously, Kie, what the hell is the matter with you?"

Kiara can only take so much. She snaps.

"I can't fucking sleep!" Kiara shouts, voice cracking, but she powers through. "I can't sleep because every time I close my eyes, I'm back in the ocean, holding both of our bodies above water so we don't fucking drown! I can't go in the ocean because we nearly died and then you almost died in my arms and how am I supposed to just get over that, JJ?"

JJ's eyes are wide as she explodes.

"Kie—"

"I'm terrified you're only one hit away from just never waking up again and I can't have that, JJ — I can't."

Kiara is standing right in front of him at this point, eyes wide and filled with unshed tears. It feels good to just yell, to get her frustrations out, even if she's yelling at JJ. His expression is blank, save for the pity in his blue eyes.

She blinks and a tear escapes. His face betrays him and his lips curl in a frown before he's wrapping his arms tight around Kiara's waist and pressing her to his chest. Her arms get crushed in his embrace but the comfort is all she needs to let it all out. She cries, loudly and embarrassingly but she can't bring herself to care. The past few days have been building and building up inside of her and it was only a matter of time before she cracked. She isn't sure how she's going to get rid of the nightmares, or get over her newfound fear of the ocean, but standing there in JJ's arms, she doesn't care.

"Kie," JJ murmurs against the curls near the crown of her head. "You were a fucking rockstar out there and you saved my life. I can never thank you. But don't you ever think you can't come to me for shit like this. I might not be the best person for it, but Kie, I promise I'll do my fucking best to help you through it."

Kiara pulls away from his chest, but JJ doesn't remove his arms. "J, I don't know what to do," she whimpers, "I can't fucking sleep."

"Fuck, I really wish we had weed here."

Kiara laughs, wiping her tears with the back of her hand. JJ's smile is pained; he always hated seeing Kiara in pain. And if tears are involved? Even less.

"Listen, if you can't sleep, I'll stay up with you. We'll talk until you're tired — or maybe having me right there beside you, alive and shit, you can tell your nightmares to fuck off because JJ Maybank is alive and kicking, baby."

Kiara laughs again, enjoying the hopeful glint in his blue eyes as he rambles. She responds with wrapping her arms around his middle and pressing the side of her face to his chest. She can hear and feel his heart beating and it brings her a sense of calmness.

"Kie, I'm so sorry," he mumbles quietly, "This is all my fault."

"I don't regret a single second," Kiara replies fiercely. She pulls back to drill it into him with her eyes, because she knows JJ and his self-blaming tendencies all too well. "I love you JJ and I would do it all over again. If I have to deal with nightmares just to have you here with me, then bring on the fucking nightmares."

Now it's JJ's turn to cough out a laugh, though it doesn't reach his eyes. It kills him to know that Kiara is suffering through all this pain and hurt — pain and hurt she's only dealing with because she saved his life.

"I love you too, Kie. And I promise I'm going to help you through this, okay? You're not alone."

Kiara's eyes search his face, ultimately landing on the side of his head that's still a tad bit sore from the hit he'd received less than a week ago. Her fingers reach up to caress it carefully and he schools his facial features to not let her know how sensitive that area of his skull is. He knows what she's thinking before she even says anything, and he sighs. "Just be careful, JJ," she says, surprising him with her words. "I don't want to lose you. I can't."

"You won't," he promises, and even though they both know it's a promise he can't keep, the conviction with which he says it nearly convinces her.

For a moment, it's just the two of them. JJ and Kiara. Best friends with endless possibilities.

Kiara thinks about it for only a second. She can kiss him right now, and he would probably welcome it. But she doesn't want to treat him like that; he means too much. Her hand slides down his bare arm instead, clutching his hand.

"No more shutting me out, okay?" JJ orders, though it lacks any authority. It's more of a pleading ask, than anything else. "Because JJ Maybank hates to be ignored and I tolerated it once, but I won't do it again, Kie."

Kiara's lips crack into a smile and it's like JJ can finally breathe easy once again. "Why do you keep talking about yourself in the third person? It's weird."

"Because it's effective."

"It's lame is what it is."

And suddenly they're back to their normal, bickering selves and JJ is wrapping a comforting arm around Kiara's shoulders as she nudges in close. He quietly promises to help her through her sleeping issues and her newfound water phobia as best he knows how. Both issues have to do with him nearly dying, and he hopes the fact that he is very much alive will help in overcoming them.

They start off slowly, JJ easing Kiara into the ocean as she clutches his hand for dear life. He makes joke after joke to make it easier. Sometimes it works and she forgets, sometimes it doesn't and she has to rush back to land. It's a process, but JJ has endless patience when it comes to Kiara and he's willing to do whatever it takes.

At night, they curl into each other, JJ's arms tucked around Kiara, while she tangles her legs with his. They talk until JJ accidentally dozes off, but it's alright, because Kiara lays her head against his chest and focuses on his heartbeat. That's how she falls asleep. She doesn't expect her nightmares about him to disappear just like that, and they don't, but with JJ's steady heartbeat underneath her, she's able to push past and get some actual sleep. In the morning, JJ apologizes profusely, but all Kiara can do is smile, as she's gotten some decent sleep for the first time since they arrived.

JJ becomes like her lifeline. It's the only way she'll survive the island.

Her parents are gone, and the pain is still fresh. She still worries about them and what they're feeling, but all she can do is think forward, on how she'll eventually make this up to them.

Her worries about JJ and his head wound don't subside either, but to her surprise, he's unbelievably more cautious as he horses around. He attempts to avoid situations where he might hit his head, and periodically asks Pope to check it out and make sure it's looking alright. Pope's knowledge is limited, especially since his fascination is with cadavers, but it's the reassurance it brings that counts. JJ also knows Kiara appreciates his cautiousness, and he'll do anything to see her smile softly at him, pride in her beautiful brown eyes.

Kiara isn't exactly surprised when she realizes she has feelings for JJ, but she is frustrated as hell. What she pulled with Pope earlier in the year wasn't cool and she'll never forgive herself for it. The realization makes her shove her feelings down, far away. She can't mess up another one of the most important relationships in her life.

Even when she gets the vibes that maybe JJ feels the same way, she still shoves her feelings down.

She notices it in the little things, such as staying back with her when their friends dive into the ocean, sitting beside her at the camp fire and throwing a comforting arm around her shoulders, pressing his face into his neck in his sleep, consistently reminding her how important she is to him.

It's starting to eat her up inside, and she hardly notices when she begins to pull away from JJ for both their sakes.

JJ notices, and he isn't fucking happy about it.

"Kie, I thought we talked about this," he says in a stressed voice, his fingers pinching the skin between his eyebrows. He had spotted her trek out into the woods for more firewood, and the urge to follow was just too strong. He's a weak man when it comes to Kiara.

Kiara startles, not having heard anyone follow her. She throws him a dirty look. "What are you talking about now, JJ?"

"You're doing it again!" JJ sputters, hands flailing as if that would drive his point home. "Pushing me away. I thought we agreed you wouldn't do that anymore."

"I'm not," Kiara replies automatically and JJ raises an eyebrow. "I'm not!"

JJ rolls his eyes, huffing out a scoff. "Oh, cut the bullshit, Kie. I told you I wasn't going to do this again with you, and I meant it."

Kiara visibly hesitates.

Does she want to spill her guts and tell JJ she's potentially falling for him? Absolutely not. But is he giving her much of a choice?

"Listen JJ, this isn't about you at all. I'm just — I don't want to hurt you or mess anything up, okay? Just  — please, don't ask questions."

Kiara absolutely butchers her explanation and she can tell by the unbelievably confused expression JJ wears.

"Kie, what the fuck are you talking about?"

She sighs, deciding maybe the best option is just to completely disappear from this conversation. JJ disagrees and he blocks her exit. "JJ, I'm begging you. Please."

"What the hell?" JJ asks, holding his arm out in front of her waist so she doesn't walk away from him. "Kiara, I swear to God—"

"What do you want me to tell you?" Kiara snaps, wild eyes darting to his confused blue ones. "That I'm staying away from you because I think I might love you and it took you nearly dying in my arms for me to figure it out? Or that I'm avoiding you because I seem to fuck up every important relationship in my life and I don't want to ruin you? Or ruin us—"

JJ interrupts, face completely blank as he says, "Shut the fuck up, Kie."

Kiara startles, shocked at his words, even though he doesn't say them angrily. She's bearing her soul to him and this is what she receives in return? She has half a mind to punch him in the throat, but then he continues.

"I've literally been in love with you since the fifth grade." That is definitely not what Kiara expects him to say. "Do you think I give a fuck if you think you're going to ruin me? Because I can assure you right now that you won't. You're one of the best fucking things to come out of my shitty life, and I don't want you to ever think you can ruin us, because you can't."

Kiara's gone speechless. For once in her goddamn life, she's absolutely speechless, and it's at the cost of her reckless, gorgeous, best friend who is currently staring at her as if she just offered him the fucking moon.

"Fifth grade?" Kiara croaks, her lips splitting into a bright smile.

JJ matches her smile, a slight blush creeping up his neck as he momentarily dodges her eyes. "Give or take. You were real annoying in fifth grade, Kie. Take this as a massive compliment."

"Oh, I do," Kiara laughs as her arms wind around his neck. She grabs onto his chin, dragging his gaze to focus back on her. His blue eyes are wide as they drop down to her lips.

Before either of them can make a move, Kiara says quietly, "Eighth grade."

"What?" JJ sputters in confusion.

"Eighth grade is when I momentarily saw you more than just JJ, my dumbass friend," Kiara explains, rolling her eyes at the smirk that graces his lips. "Momentarily!"

JJ chuckles, tongue darting out to wet his lips. Kiara's eyes track the movement. "I'll take it."

After another moment with no movement, Kiara huffs, tugging him closer. "Am I going to have to ignore you again for you to fucking kiss me or what are we doing here?"

"Pushy," JJ quips, nearly laughing at Kiara's murderous expression. "I always knew you wanted me."

"You know what? I've gone seventeen years without it, I can go seventeen more."

JJ's grin drops immediately when Kiara starts to pull away, so he tugs her closer and feverishly presses his lips to hers. He immediately slows down, wanting to savour this long awaited moment, but Kiara isn't interested in slow. Her hands slide into his fluffy hair as she deepens the kiss with a level of desperation she isn't even aware she possesses. Kiara absentmindedly tugs on his blonde locks and JJ lets out a low groan; she takes full advantage and sneaks her tongue into his mouth. JJ only groans louder.

"Holy fuck, Kie," JJ breathes against her lips when they inevitably pull away from each other to catch a breath. "I just always assumed you were an amazing kisser but Jesus Christ, I think I need to sit down."

Kiara wants to roll her eyes, but she finds herself laughing instead. "You're an idiot."

"Your idiot, though," JJ replies, then pauses. "Right?"

The moment of insecurity in his voice is telling, especially for a man who hates to show it. He wants to be sure they're on the same page, because it'll hurt too much if they aren't.

"My idiot," Kiara confirms, latching onto his hand.

JJ pulls on their intertwined hands, before adding in a condescending tone, "See what communication can do, Kiara?"

Regardless of what Kiara wants to fire back, he's absolutely right. But she can never leave him with the satisfaction.

So, she shoots him a glare and says, "You want to see what my foot in your ass can do?"

"That's kinda kinky, babe," JJ smirks, "Don't worry, I'm all for it, though."

Kiara doesn't argue in response, or follow through on her threats of bodily harm. She stands on her tip-toes and presses a gentle kiss to JJ's unsuspecting lips. When JJ looks at her with questioning blue eyes (though he's definitely not complaining), Kiara shrugs and says, "Just because I can."

She can and she does, very willingly.

JJ doesn't mind one single bit.

#outer banks #outerbanks #obx #jiara #jj maybank #kiara carrera #jiara fanfiction #jiara fanfic #jiara fics #obx spoilers

[19gumi]

WHEN THE SUN SETS | KUROO TETSUROU

Summary: Kuroo hates the way he can never tell what’s on your mind (and also, you eat your cherries ridiculously slowly)

Genre: Fluff (childhood friends to lovers, mutual pining)

Word count: 1.8k

Porcelain plates now stained with chocolate are neatly tossed to the side, bearing the remnants of the croissants Kuroo treated the two of you with. Secluded in your favorite part of the park, you try to get one last whiff of the sweet pastry that you ate a little too quickly for your liking, making a mental note to pay that bakery another visit soon.

The final beams of sunlight graze your face as you observe the birds above you, hurrying to find a shelter before the rosy sky hues turn dark blue. You’ve missed their renowned song – the winter fell into a silence after their departure, sometimes too deafening when paired up with the freezing December cold.

Your field of vision is obstructed by a muscular arm reaching for the cherries in the bowl placed beside your head. You observe his Adam’s apple move as he swallows the fruit, eyes focused on the horizon sprawled in front of him. And then they suddenly shift to your figure, your head soundly placed in his lap.

“You okay?” he asks, thumb rubbing circles in your shoulder.

“Why wouldn’t I be?”

“Dunno. You seemed lost in thought.”

You’re about to respond when his body abruptly shifts under yours, the motion prompting you to sit up straight. Kuroo’s hand flies to the back of his head, and you assume he’s received a hit to it.

That is shortly proven to be true when a distressed mother shouts after her son who you don’t even notice at first, standing a foot away from the two of you. His arms are folded behind his back, lips pouting as his eyes search for the ball he had previously been playing with.

Kuroo’s furrowed brows shift back to their original shape, face muscles relaxing as he takes in the sight of the kindergartener. The mother pants as she approaches the two of you, crouching down next to the child that you assumed wasn’t more than 5 years old.

“Hi, I’m very sorry to have caused-“

Kuroo swats his arms in the air. “It’s not a big deal really, didn’t even hurt.” He then smiles at the kid, extending his hand towards him. “Nice to meet you. I’m Kuroo.”

The kid buries his head in the crook of his mother’s neck as a response, refusing Kuroo’s handshake. She spots the ball and sends him off to pick it up, sighing deeply.

“He gets shy sometimes,” she chuckles, scratching her forehead.

Couple of more apologies and one goodbye later, the sun now long hidden and the moon greeting you (this time only one half of it), Kuroo wishes he could take a peek at your mind.

He knows that’s not possible, though, leaving him with the only option of staring at the side of your face, alluringly illuminated under the evening sky. Admiring the faint glint in your eyes, he sighs when he realizes he is about to go to bed with the same unanswered questions another night in a row.

Kuroo is too lost in the way his fingertips itch to sink themselves in your cheeks, his body starving for that addicting warmth of yours – the one he sensed once for the first time many years ago and never wanted to let go of again.

You turn your head around unreasonably quickly – he’s unprepared and so, so exposed. The look in his eyes is soft, way too soft for you to have a full view of it. He hasn’t said a word, but the faint burning in the pit of his stomach convinces him he’s spilled the most tender secrets of his.

“You know,” you begin, reaching for the bowl with cherries behind you. You chew painfully slow, he thinks, the time that it takes for you to swallow the cherry seeming like an eternity.

“That child from earlier,” you continue at last, fiddling with your hands in your lap. “He reminded me of myself when I was his age.”

Kuroo doesn’t know what he was hoping for, but your words do cause a change in his stance. “How so?”

And there you are, flashing him your signature smile one more time. The enigmatic one, the exact one that he’s been trying to decipher unceasingly.

The same one that causes him to miss serves in practice.

The one that keeps him from entering the world of his dreams at night, but also the one that makes him feel like he’s living the sweetest fantasies of his when he gets to see it up close.

“Just like the birds we watched earlier, the pink sky alerts everyone that it’s time to find a shelter for the night,” you glance at him, to which he nods, prompting you to continue. “My mom would always tell me to go straight home once the sky changed colors, and you know I always followed that rule.”

“Yeah, I remember going home and sulking during dinner because I didn’t get to spend more time with you.”

He mouths an ‘ouch!’ when you poke him in the ribs, clutching at his chest. “Dramatic much?” you chuckle, rubbing circles in his back.

“Anyway,” you continue, retracting your hand. “Sometimes I’d lose my toys just like that child from earlier did, but I wouldn’t have enough time to look for them. The street lights would already be turned on and I didn’t want the monsters to catch me.”

Kuroo lets out a hearty laugh. “Monsters? What monsters?”

You shift your eyes towards your hands, which he sees as a chance to inch closer, just enough for him to feel your shoulder against his.

“Dunno,” you say. “But I knew once I’d reach my mom’s arms that I was safe. She’d always nag at me for forgetting to wash my hands – when in reality I didn’t, I always remembered to do it. But I guess I craved that noise which served as an additional proof that I was secure between the four walls of my room, when the silence of the night was the loudest.”

“Well aren’t you a poetic one [name],” he teases, wrapping an arm around your shoulders.

A hush descends between the two of you. Kuroo can feel his lips bruising as he chews on them, unsure whether to verbalize the words that could possibly hint at the desires he held close to his heart.

In the end he does it anyway. “It’s way past sunset now, though. So why,” his voice cracks, before he swiftly disguises it as a cough. Or at least he tries to. “Why aren’t you rushing to get home? What if as we speak, the monsters are actually coming to get you?”

It’s your turn to stare at his side profile now, your pulse forming an unsteady rhythm in your throat as you study the slope of his nose, unsure of what was about to come next.

A confession? Were you really ready to ruin a decade long friendship just because rather than playing catch with him you wanted to kiss his lips instead?

His question is silly, you aren’t that eight year old child anymore – the one who’d run away and leave their friends in the street the same instant the clock stroke seven-thirty.

It’s way past seven now, air breezy and short of any sunrays piercing through it, but not even the scariest monster in this world could make you budge from the tranquility surrounding you in this very moment.

It’s almost as if the thought of a life without Kuroo Tetsurou horrifies you more than anything else that’s out in the wild, waiting for you.

“That’s what I was wondering too”, you sigh. “It might be because you’re here.”

And just like that, your secret is disclosed; it’s a simple statement that makes your lungs feel lighter, the burden of having to bear it within your chest for so long now easing with every exhale you take.

He gulps. The arm around your shoulders seems to have become stiffer, too. He’s already close enough for you to feel his breath on your cheek and all you wish for is to lean into his embrace, all of this talk turning your eyelids heavy.

“But I was there all those years ago as well. What changed?”

“Well, for starters, I was what, eight years old?” you scoff, meeting his eyes momentarily before you let your head fall on his chest, inhaling deeply. You have yearned for the scent of the fresh new leaves ever since they wilted last October. “I guess I wasn’t in love with you back then, Tetsu.”

It’s silent. You think it’s unfair – everything you’ve built over the years rapidly slipping through your fingers, just because of one sentence full of longing, anticipation. But then his arm travels down to wrap itself around your waist, the other one finding its way to the nape of your neck.

It’s not the first time he’s heard those words leave your mouth - his imagination has deceived him multiple times already. He’d wake up only to find himself clinging onto his pillow, providing enough heat to trick him into thinking it belonged to you.

However, your scent is way too real for everything to be fake this time around; it simply can’t be. The words he’s been longing to hear are there, the confession lingering in the air only for him and the trees around you to know.

All it takes now is for you to learn his answer, even though the way he’s pulling you into his body gives you an idea of what it might be.

“Do you know why I never went home before you did?” he asks.

“Mm. Why?” your voice is muffled by his hoodie, the vibration sending chills down his spine. He’s convinced now. This is truly his reality he’d always been wishing for.

“Because you were there,” he tilts his head, moving your chin so you can look up at him. He’s grinning, and if he didn’t just admit he was in love with you, you’d probably be now telling him how lame you thought he was. “I couldn’t understand it then, the way your presence made me feel at peace. I realized what it was only when we started high school. I didn’t want to say anything, though.”

“So?”

“So,” he says, his hand leaving your waist to join his other one on your face, lightly squishing your cheeks. “I’m very much in love with you, too.”

His gaze momentarily shifts to your lips, before it’s back on your eyes. “I really want to kiss you, [name].”

The entirety of your body heat accumulates in your face, and his fingers effortlessly melt against it, your body sinking into the grassy earth as if it’s sand.

“Do you?” you ask, your thumb grazing his bottom lip.

“Yes. Can I?”

You nod, and Kuroo swears his heart skips a beat. Hypnotized, he allows his eyes to flutter shut, ready to memorize all the various flavors you have to offer.

When finally he gets to savor your bare, delicate skin - sweeter than anything he has ever tasted before, it’s like the world stops for the both of you.

Or maybe you only drift to your own, each swipe of his tongue guiding you through a new route, the destination of which has yet to be discovered.

#kuroo x reader #kuroo x you #kuroo x y/n #kuroo fluff #kuroo tetsuro x reader #kuroo tetsuro fluff #kuroo tetsuro x you #haikyuu #haikyuu fluff

[cursedwriter]

You’re Everything and More - One Shot

Request: Anon: Hey, I saw that you’re looking for insp sooo I have the idea that the reader wakes up from a nightmare and Rob comforts her and there’s a lot of fluff thank you! 

Author’s note: Requests are open! Send anything you want! For the moment I’ll stick to one shots, otherwise I’ll lose control and I’m still in the middle of the Semester sooo that wouldn’t be great. Also I haven’t written in a while so this might suck alsooo can we please appreciate the gif like hot damn what I wouldn’t give

Word Count: 1.3k

“Shh, everything’s alright,” someone murmured next to you. “I’m here. It was just a dream.”

You sat up straight, momentarily confused about your surroundings, but the confusion vanished as soon as you felt his warm hand rub soothingly up and down your back. The room was dark, so you couldn’t see him, but you felt him shift behind you and suddenly his soft lips pressed feathery kisses along your shoulder. Gently his other hand searched for your face, cupping it and wiping his thumb across your cheek. Until this point you hadn’t even noticed that you were crying.

“I’m sorry,” you croaked out, voice sounding off to your own ears. “I’m sorry I woke you.” 

His hand fell from your face and you instantly missed his warm touch. “Don’t be silly,” he reassured you. You felt him laying down again, his hand reaching out to you once more, but this time to pull you down gently. You nestled yourself against his side, inhaling his scent and letting his comforting backrubs soothe you further. Soon your whimpers stopped and so did the tears. “Do you want to talk about it?” He asked after a short moment of silence.

You didn’t answer at first, not really sure what to say. It wasn’t because you were ashamed, you knew that you could tell him anything … but saying it aloud would bring the memories back and it hurt you just to think about it. He didn’t press, though, maybe thinking that you had fallen asleep again. “I don’t remember all of it,” you broke the silence. The dream was already hazy in your mind, seeping through your hands like sand. You could barely hold on to the exact images, but that wasn’t necessary anyway. The feeling of it lingered, burned inside your bones, your heart, leaving a scorching sensation behind, a bitter aftertaste. “You … You left me,” you were barely able to choke the words out, the hollow feeling still very much prominent in the pit of your stomach.

In response to your words, his grip around you tightened and he brought you closer to his body. You rested your head on his chest, listening to his even breathing and the steady beating of his heart. “You know I’d never do that,” he whispered against your hair, pressing a light kiss on it after he was done.

“Please, don’t make promises that you can’t keep.” Your voice was also barely above a whisper and after he didn’t answer, you were almost certain that he hadn’t heard you.

“I’m not,” he said eventually. “I mean … how could I ever leave you when you’re the best thing that has ever happened to me? When you’re literally everything I always hoped for and so much more? How could I?”

It was quiet again while you processed his words. You knew that he loved you, he told you that over and over again every day, but somehow you still couldn’t believe it sometimes. It wasn’t easy navigating your normal life through the craziness that was his life. In the beginning you found it kind of amusing that people were trying to get pictures of you, like … why would anyone want that? It was so absurd to you that you took it as a joke at first. Now, though, everything looked a lot different. Just because you were dating someone in the spotlight made everyone believe it was okay to spread false rumors about you, have an opinion on you as a person without having ever spoken to you personally and of course everyone knew what was best for Rob but Rob himself apparently… and the best thing almost always didn’t include you. You were bashed online for not ‘being good enough’ for ‘just wanting his money and fame’ and whatnot. Rob was better at ignoring snide comments. He was used to people having their opinions on him and he didn’t care much for it. You, on the other hand, had never had to deal with anything remotely close to this before. This stood in no correlation to your middle school self being bullied by some popular girl that liked to pick on you because you had had a weird obsession with Star Wars at the time and that was only ‘for boys’. And though, obviously that had hurt you at the time - because how could somebody hate you for something that you loved? – this now was a million times worse. You never really considered yourself to be super insecure – the normal amount of insecure, sure, nobody’s perfect and whatnot – but after that one afternoon where you went down an online spiral and sifted your way through every comment that was directed either directly at you or at your relationship with Rob, things had taken a considerable turn. You had cried for hours, thanking god that Rob wasn’t home to see you like this. He felt bad enough already that he had made your life a lot harder – which was ridiculous because it wasn’t his fault, but he liked to burden himself whenever he found an excuse to do so. It drove you nuts sometimes. However, all those comments had you questioning if someone like him could really ever love someone like you. And most of the time you came to the conclusion that you must be dreaming whenever he reassured you that he did love you.

“I just feel like that one of those days you’ll realize what a mess I am…,” quiet sobs escaped your lips, but you tried your hardest to force the tears back that were already welling up behind your eyes. “One day you might hate everything about me that you find endearing now and then you’ll leave me … and I can’t even be mad, because deep down I knew it all along … You’re too good for me.”

You could feel him tense under your touch, a long sigh left his lungs and the hand that was rubbing you back slowly came up to play with your hair. Something he liked to do when he was anxious.

“I hate that you think so little of yourself… I wish you could see yourself through my eyes just once.” While his right hand played with your hair, his other found your hand that rested on his chest and he intertwined your fingers. He brought your hand up to his lips and kissed every one of your fingers with brief feathery kisses that sent butterflies through your stomach. “Because if you did, you’d see that there is no way in hell that I could ever hate you! Ever!” He laid your hand down again, playing with your fingers now. “I don’t think I’ve ever loved anyone as much as I love you. Sometimes the feeling’s so intense I’m worried my heart will suddenly explode because it can’t contain the amount of love I have for you! Being apart hurts me physically and whenever I’m away for work I count down the days until I can finally hold you in my arms again! I think everyone’s already annoyed by me, because I just can’t shut up talking about you, because you’re literally the only thing that’s ever on my mind. If anything, I’m the one who’s afraid that you might leave me once you’ve had enough.” He paused his monologue, deep in thought and then he added, “I don’t think I could survive that.”

You didn’t really know what to say after that, stunned at his declaration. The only thing you could think of was to show him how much he meant to you. You propped yourself up on his chest, laying on top of him now. There was absolutely no light in the room, so you couldn’t see his face. With your nose you slowly tested your way up, leaving kisses as you went: up his throat, on his jawline and cheeks and his nose until finally your lips found his. The kiss was slow and soft at first, but soon it turned needier, more forceful as if you were afraid that he might disappear under your touch.

Well, it’s safe to say you didn’t get much sleep that night. 

Send requests HERE

#robert pattinson #robert pattinson imagine #robert pattinson fanfiction #robert pattinson x reader #edward cullen #twilight #tenet #twilight reimagined #twilight renaissance

[wisp-of-thought]

peonies & pomegranates: when eve meets persephone

Persephone meets Eve standing at the edge of the underworld

A fist full of soil

Persephone says,

Hello there

Eve says,

I thought

I might be able to see them

In the end,

Again.

Her hands unfurl and

Let the dirt fall

You smell like them

Do

You

Know?

You smell like the flowers

Left behind

In Eden.

And Eve turns to look at her then.

And it has been many centuries

For them both

But

Persephone recognizes the never fading gleam,

The twinkle in her eye

Birthed only from

The glazing nectar of

Forbidden fruit.

A mirror reflection

Of herself.

Two women who chose to

Give in

Honour

Their hunger

In hopes of a moments reprieve

From being devoured by their own

Longing.

Persephone says,

You must be

Eve

Eve flitches at her own name.

Merely says

Nothing grows here

And Persephone understands

Her heartbreak

Says

No.

I am sorry.

And Eve flinches at that too.

Breathes,

No

Whispers,

No more

Apologies

Here.

I have lived a life time of

Repentance.

And I

Am done with

All this

Asking for forgiveness

For things we are not to blame for.

For things we are not sorry for.

Persephone

Still scented with Eden’s greenery says

I know

And Eve looks at her with

More ache

Than doubt.

Let’s the goddess assure her

That

You do not have

To be sorry anymore

Here.

And she takes the woman's hand in hers.

Smeared with the kingdoms

Dirt.

A handful of miniscule stones

Ground to sand.

Caught beneath her nails.

Persephone can feel

Life rolling off the

Girl

In gentle waves.

Even here,

After,

She ought to have been

Drained.

As though

The only way to

Take her

Had been instead,

To drown her

Completely

In the sea of

Existance.

And she

Was still

Dripping.

I did not want

To go back

To a gilded cage.

Even if the bars were wound

In vines

And blossoms.

I just

Missed

The flowers.

Persephone sits with her

At the edge of the underworld.

Says

I know

And Eve

Is tired of a lifetime of

Biting her tongue.

What do you know

Of wanting

Persephone?

A Queendom in Spring.

A kingdom come fall.

A million miles below the ground,

When the frost strikes.

Do you know what it is like to be

Cold

Persephone?

To be exiled?

To be

Unwanted?

And it is Eve.

No malice and all

Curiosity.

And Persephone wishes

She could give her

The answers

She needs to be

At peace.

I know

Much of wanting

And the unwanting.

Persephone looks

Up

To

The ground

Above

They blame me

For the plague of

Cold and barren land

And Eve knows too

Well

They blame me

For the plague of

A lifetime of repentance

And Persephone knows too

Well

For paying the price

Of my spent desire.

And their contempt

Drips

Acidic

Into the soil

Eve picks at the dirt

Beneath her nails

As though

She can feel

The burning.

And replies

As though to say

How dare you want,

Woman,

More than what we have

Permitted you to have.

Don't be

Selfish

Persephone finishes for

Her

Own heart and fists

Twisting

Curling

Into themselves.

And Eve

Goes on.

As though to say

How dare you disobey

What you were told to be.

How dare you

Attempt to become

More

Than we have let you

Be.

Eve looks at Persephone then

And it has been many centuries

For them both

But

Eve recognizes the never fading gleam

The twinkle in her eye

Birthed only from

The glazing nectar of

Forbidden fruit

A mirror reflection

Of herself.

I was only

Hungry

Says Eve

I know

Says Persephone

And I did not know

What could stifle

My appetite.

I did not know

What I craved.

Just that

I was starving.

And that

Nothing

Was

Enough.

And he came to you

In your instability

And they both know this story

By heart.

And he said

Eat, love

If you would like

Only

If you would like

And he dropped it into your palms

And she can almost feel the weight in her hands.

Where it once rested,

Before it was digested,

And left for her to carry

In the pit of herself

For eternity.

And it smelt of sweet possibility

Eve inhales.

Though breath means

Nothing here.

But she does it anyways

For the sake of

Nostalgia.

And he gave you a fruit

And I brought it to my own lips

And he gave you a choice

And I laid it on my own tongue

Peresphone watches her

Mirror

Knowingly.

And you chose

To bite

To swallow

The consequences.

And it hangs between them.

Tangible.

Ripe.

And ready

To fall.

The culmination

Of two seeded

Choices

And it

Drops

Into

Persephone's lap

Persephone's palms

Persephone's mouth

And you would do it again

And the fruit always looks deceptively

Delectable

But the nectar

Of the truth

Is always

Bitter

And Eve cups her hands below

The goddesses chin

And lets the golden syrup

Accumulate

And

Sips

Yes

I would

Do it

Again

And they do not need to speak

To say:

If I was given the chance

The choice

To save myself

Again

I would do it

I would take it

Over

And

Over

And

Over

Again.

Because

I do not think

I could ever

Be sorry

For being

Hungry

And eating

Until

I was full

And Persephone

Nods

Understanding

The all consuming nature of

The desire to

Know.

I do not think

I could ever

Be sorry

For choosing to live

Over

Survive.

I was never

Sorry

Even when

They punished me for

Knowing

For wanting

For being something other than

A good girl

A docile daughter

And Eve laughs

And Persephone is struck

By how much the

Sound tastes of

Fresh bloom.

Have they ever met

Mother Nature

She is

No

Soft

Or

Submissive

Thing

And Persephone smiles then too

And Eve is struck

By how much the

Image looks like

The creation of

A universe.

My mother

Warned me

Her breath is breeze after

Rainfall

To be wary of bitter men

And their sweet offerings

Her gaze is an ocean

Rippling reflection

And my mother said

It is a dangerous game to play

Persephone

She is

The symphony

Of life.

And my father said,

Listen to me, Eve

And my mother said

Come home to me

Persephone

Or their will be consequences

You belong here

In the sun

In the garden

In my gaze

In my grasp

And they both

Know this story

By heart.

Muscle memory

Fear

Hate

Rage

Longing

Stillness.

And I thought,

I belong wherever

I please.

And I thought

I deserve

To know.

I thought

I will not be afraid

Of the dark.

I thought

I deserve

To eat.

I thought

I will not bow to death.

And Eve is looking at

Persephone.

And the reflection

Is cracking.

And instead

He lowered his brow

To brush his lips

Across your knuckles.

And Persephone is looking at

Eve

And the reflection

Is shattering.

And instead

He bent a knee for me.

The glass is

Falling.

I do not know

What that is like.

I do not think

He loves me

Anymore.

And the silence

Aches for them both

How do you

Know?

And Eve

Considers this.

The quiet

Holds her

Softly.

I do not think I know

What love ought to be.

I do not think

The tree

Taught me

This.

And Persephone

Picks up

The shards,

Dew drops of light

Healing the image

Into a make shift

Mosaic.

Hands still gentle

When they brush away

Her doubt.

Love

Is

The way

The truth

Made itself

Soft

And

Sweet

For you,

Love.

Love

Is

The way

You choose

It

And

It Chose

You.

And Eve is

Not staring

At a mirror

She is gazing

At

The entirety

Of the universe

At once.

And the truth is

My lover

My sin

My salvation

That I was not

Naive

Or

Ignorant

Or

Victim

To a man's

Deception

And when I committed the

Transgression

Of

Making a choice

That was wholly my own

I did not beg to be kept

To be released

I walked out of

Paradise

With my head held high

Bid farewell to the

Light

And entered

The shadows

Let the gates shut behind me

And I left

And I stayed

And it was

My

Choice

And it is

In Persphone’s arms

That Eve learns

For the first time

Of what it is like

To be held

Other than as

Grudge

Or

Guilt.

And Eve

Is embraced by the universe

Until

At last

She knows

e v e r y t h i n g

#writing #writeblr #writerscreed #poetryportal #persephone #quotes #poem #poetry #love #feminism #persephades #hades #greek myth poetry #greek mythology #greek myth aesthetic #art #sad #spilled writing #spilled thoughts #spilled words #spilled ink #spilled poetry #books #booklr #writing prompt #poets on tumblr #short story #wlw #love poem #night aesthetic

[birdiefw]

JJ MAYBANK | NOT MY CHOICE PT. 1

Part Two — Here

Requested by: @maybebanks

Summary: You’ve always been a Pogue despite your wealth and had been friends with John B. and his crew for as long as you could remember. However, you were also dating Rafe Cameron but your friend didn’t know, and worst of all, it wasn’t your decision. But one day Rafe sees you and JJ together and decides to show you and JJ who you belong to.

Warnings: swearing, anxiety, sexual assault, groping, ANGST (IF ANY OF THESE MAKES YOU UNCOMFORTABLE PLEASE DON’T READ)

Y/ND/N = Your Next-door Neighbor

A/N: Thank you so much for requesting! I’ve been trying to come up with another idea for a JJ imagine and I’m so glad you sent me this! I’ve decided to make this into two parts, so I hope you don’t mind that I saved a few details of the request for the next part! I hope you enjoy, too!

[not my gif!!!]



You were three weeks into your relationship with Rafe Cameron and you hated it.

Around your parents he was kind, thoughtful, and gentle — which is why they forced you into a relationship with him against your wishes by filling Rafe’s head with the idea that you were just playing hard to get — and you were unable to tell him no. But when your parents weren’t around, he someone else completely, and it terrified you.

He was erratic, controlling, and manipulative. You knew part of it was because of the drugs he took as often as he could, but that didn’t excuse his ruthless actions. His own relationships with his family was rocky at best, and you could see it was taking a bigger toll on him than he would’ve cared to admit. You knew better than to question it and went along with whatever he wanted in order to keep him happy and feeling in control; you’d seen him lose himself once and you didn’t want that to happen again. You didn’t think he’d physically hurt you with as much as he claimed to care about you, but you were never too sure with him.

Anytime you managed to get some free time away from him and your family, you found yourself with the Pogues down in the Cut. They knew you were wealthy, but that didn’t stop them from welcoming you in once they got to know you and saw how kind and caring you were — which you thanked Kie for as she was the one you’d befriended first. You were close with the rest of John B.’s group — especially JJ which was a surprise to both of you.

You didn’t expect to be so drawn to the most reckless and destructive one of them all, but you saw how kind and gentle he could be. He didn’t think he’d find you as enticing as he did either, but he wasn’t complaining. You treated him better than most and accepted him for who he was even with all of his flaws.

He didn’t show his soft side a lot, but you’d seen it more than the others had as if fate was trying to tell you two something you were failing to see for yourself; perhaps that was why you two wound up spending the day together.

With John B. job hunting, Kiara waitressing at The Wreck, and Pope delivering groceries, you and JJ were the only ones with some free time. JJ was supposed to work later, but until then the two of you decided to go surfing wfilr the sun was still shining brightly in the sky and the waves were nearly perfect. Rafe was apparently working out with Topper and Kelc, and knowing them, you’d figured it wouldn’t be a while until they were done. They often ended up at one of their houses afterwards, so you didn’t think Rafe would want to spend anytime with you.

“You comin’ or what, Y/N?” JJ laughed, catching your attention. “We ain’t got all day!”

You suddenly blinked back to reality, gaping as the blond boy was already out in the water and his heart racing with excitement. You scoffed offensively, hurrying after him with your surfboard in tow. “What the fuck, JJ?” You whined, quickly getting on the board and paddling towards him. He loudly laughed, water splattering onto your faces as you moved closer and closer to the gushing waves. “I can’t believe you left me behind!”

“It’s not my fault you weren’t paying attention,” he replied shortly.

You huffed, playfully rolling your eyes. “You’re a shithead, Maybank.”

“Yeah, but you like it.”

Rather than answering him or giving him an even bigger ego boost, you just splashed him and made your way towards the rolling waves with him right behind you. There were only a few other people lounging at the beach, the annual Fourth of July parade more interesting to the town than the waves that never left. Your parents were helping out with the Red Cross float, but you knew they wouldn’t realize you weren’t there in the crowd. JJ could’ve cared less, and as you got to your feet on your board and gliding across the water, you didn’t regret skipping out on it and going to the beach with your favorite Pogue.

———

It wasn’t until a few hours later when you and JJ conquered as many waves as you could that you two decided to call it quits and go and get some food. You’d fallen off your boards more times than you would’ve cared to admit, but you didn’t mind it. The water comforted you every time you fell into it, cooling off your warm skin that the sun was harshly beating down on. JJ came to your aid every time your body tumbled off your board, helping you back onto it with ease, and you did the same with him.

Surfing was dangerous, but it didn’t feel like it when you were with JJ.

When you were with him, you didn’t have to constantly worry about your parents, Rafe, or all of the responsibilities you were currently neglecting to do. All of your worries washed away with the sea and were pushed down to depths of the ocean where only the seaweed would feel the tension. You’d bickered on and off the entire time, trying to one up each other with each wave that came to tower over you two. There were a few times you almost fell face first when you saw JJ doing a trick you’d never seen before, but you caught yourself almost every time. Almost.

Saltwater harshly clung to your hair, the water trickling down your skin as you made your way out of the water. Your board was lazily tucked under your arm once more, a smile adorning your lips while your feet pushed into the wet sand. JJ was right beside you, his hair dripping and looking a little more dark than normal. He was heavily breathing and his shoulders were a little red — as were yours — but his smile never deterred nor did the joyful shine in his eyes that simply couldn’t be missed.

“I don’t know which one of us did worse today,” you laughed, stopping in the sand a little ways away from the water. You pushed your board down into the ground, slightly leaning against it with yours lips pulled up into a genuine grin.

JJ did the same, lightly wiping at his wet faces when a few drops trickled past his eyes. “Really? ‘Cause I’m pretty sure you wiped out more than I did.”

You huffed and shoved his arm. “I did not!”

“Did too!”

You scoffed and shook your head. You were too hungry to continue with this. “You know what? I’m gonna let you have this one, but just this once.”

“Wow, how thoughtful of you, Y/N,” he chuckled.

You laughed along with him and began to walk ahead with JJ a little ways behind you. “I am very thoughtful, thank you very much.”

“Sure, whatever you—”

“Y/N?” Your entire body froze when you saw Rafe making his way towards you and JJ. He wore a yellow tank top and black shorts, a few pieces of his hair falling in his face like he hadn’t used enough gel to keep its kicked back. His features were stern, eyes narrowed and locked in JJ. Your breath hitched in your throat the closer he got to you, unsure as to how he knew where you were.

“H-Hey, Rafe,” you stammered nervously, unable for bring yourself to face JJ. You couldn’t imagine what must’ve been going through his head. Since when did you become friends with Rafe? “W-What’re you doing here?”

Rafe clenched his jaw, his gaze swiveling from JJ to you. He was only inches away from you, and JJ had his fist clenching and unclenching. “Y/ND/N said you were at the beach,” he answered, looking back to JJ. “I finished early with the boys and I thought we could catch some waves.”

“Sorry, man, you’re too late,” JJ said, smugly smirking.

“Oh, am I?” Rafe taunted darkly. You gulped, your head slowly turning to face JJ. His eyes locked with yours, brows furrowing together at the unreadable look on your features. “I think that’s up to me and Y/N, Pogue. Isn’t that right, babe?”

“Babe?” JJ repeated in disbelief, eyes widening like a deer stuck in a set of headlights. Your heart sank into the lowest pit of your stomach, seeing JJ’s face fall. He didn’t want to believe it, and you didn’t want to either. “You’re joking.”

“What’s it to you?” Rafe scoffed, coming to stand beside you. He was a little too close for comfort, most certainly pushing his boundaries more than he ever had before. But you were almost paralyzed, your brain trying to piece together a way for this to go better than how you feared it would.

“Rafe, let’s just go—”

“No, hold on,” Rafe denied. He came up partially behind you, raising his brows towards a seething JJ. “You don’t believe me, do you?”

“Why should I?” JJ snapped. His eyes widened when he saw Rafe lean in close, gingerly pressing his lips to your neck. One of his hands touched your hip, going around and squeezing your ass like he was marking you to show JJ you belonged to him.

Your mind screamed at you to tell him to stop, to shove him away and make a run for it, but you couldn’t. Instead you held a poker face, doing your best to keep your breathing even so you didn’t alert either boys of your discomfort. You could’ve sworn JJ was trying to kill Rafe with his darkened eyes, but you weren’t showing any signs that you didn’t like it. You harshly bit your tongue, not wanting your urge to cry to take over and anger Rafe.

That was the last thing you needed.

“You like that, don’t you, Y/N?” Rafe murmured against your skin, making sure JJ heard him.

You meekly nodded, forcing a faint smile on your lips. “Yes,” you managed to breath out.

Rafe seemed pleased with your answer and stopped. He pressed a kiss to your cheek and took your hand in his, tugging you away from JJ. “Let’s get outta here,” he said, shooting JJ a nasty glare. “Kelc is throwing a party and we can’t miss it.”

“Okay,” you squeaked out. You allowed him to pull you along and in the direction of his bike, biting your bottom lip. You stole a glance back at JJ, and for the first time, he was left completely speechless.

———

A/N: I hope y’all liked this! Feel free to send me some more requests!!

#outer banks #jj maybank #jj maybank imagine #rafe cameron #rafe #obx #obx imagine #topper #sarah cameron #kiara outer banks #kie #pope heyward #rudy pankow #jj maybank smut #madelyn cline #madison bailey #john b #john b routledge #john b imagine

[moonknightly]

hand in hand, we’re weary eyed : poe dameron x reader

Word Count: 1.2k. A short one today, fellas.

Excerpt: “So many times did he imagine walking you to your quarters at night, stealing a kiss when you least expected it. He’d thought about how you’d taste, whether or not you’d kiss him back or if you’d smack him hard across the cheek.”

Warnings: Mentions of death and loss, mentions of blood and violence. Typical SW things. 

“You ever smell something that reminds you of home?”

Your voice was soft, gentle, and Poe watched you with a fond smile playing at his lips as you plucked a dew soaked blade of grass from the ground, running it between your fingers, collecting the moisture and watching it slide down your palm.

He knew exactly what you meant, of course. Dirt, rain, freshly brewed caf — they were all scents that never failed to bring him home, always put him straight back on Yavin no matter how far he wandered. Back to when he was just a small boy with no concept of fighting and war, before his hands had been painted red by heartache and murder. Before everything changed, when he still had his innocence and his mother’s hand running through his soft curls instead of the heavy weight of an abandoned ring around his neck.

Poe knew exactly what you meant, but he could listen to your sweet voice for hours, could never imagine growing tired of hearing you speak.

“Like what?”

You pursed your lips, and Poe had to resist the urge to lean forward and kiss you, taste you. He wanted to, so badly, but it wasn’t the right time. Was never the right time.

“Like-” You hesitated, inhaling deeply, the crease between your brows relaxing.

Poe had never seen you so at peace before, so calm and still. Serenity looked good on you, and watching you brought a sense of comfort to his chest — a warmth that fluttered through his veins and deep into the pit of his stomach.

Butterflies. You gave Poe Dameron butterflies just by looking so kriffin’ cute, sitting there next to him, your hands almost touching. If he moved just an inch to the left, he could hold your hand, feel your fingers intertwined with his. He could-

“Like the smell of the sea. The salt and the sand,” you hummed, breaking Poe from his thoughts, causing the tips of his ears to turn a subtle shade of pink when his fingers twitched towards yours. “Or that fresh scent after it rains, when steam starts to rise off hot stone. Smoke and ash.”

The last one made Poe flinch.

He knew your village had been burned to the ground by the First Order. He knew you had been the only one to survive, and that Leia had found you when you were only a child, small and afraid and covered in black soot.

But that wasn’t the memory smoke held, not for you. No, it reminded you of sitting around a bonfire with both of your parents, their faces blurry from years passed, but their essence, their memory — the comfort and the love their presence always brought only grew stronger as you grew older.

And Poe loved that for you, he did.

He just wished his mother’s memory brought that same feeling to his chest.

Instead, each time he thought of her, he was only reminded of what he’d lost, what he was fighting for — the same cause Shara had been beyond devoted to and had subsequently given her life for. A cause that had ripped her away far too soon, had left Poe motherless and Kes with a gaping hole in his chest that could never be filled.

And that was hard, beyond hard, because he knew Shara would be disappointed in him for thinking that way.

He tried so hard to honor his mother. Tried so hard to do the right thing in hopes of making her proud but it was just so damn hard sometimes. She’d want him to fight, would want all of his resentment and anger to be directed at the First Order but truth be told, he held some for the Resistance too and he knew that was so, so wrong.

The First Order stole so much from Poe. So much, but the Resistance only continued to take from him, too.

He could never sleep through the night anymore, could never walk very far without looking over his shoulder just to make sure he wasn’t being followed. It took away his freedom, the better life his parents had hoped for him. It would eventually take his life, just like it had taken his mother’s.

Like it had taken yours.

“You’re not even here anymore.”

Poe couldn’t look at your face, couldn’t bring himself to look away from your hand as he finally moved that last inch, expecting to reach out and feel your skin but his fingers only touched grass.

“You’re gone just like the rest of them.”

You stayed silent, and when Poe’s eyes finally fluttered up to your face, he found that you were also looking down at your hands.

He wondered if you missed the warmth as much as he did.

“I never even got the chance to tell you how I feel.”

He’d wanted to. So many times did he imagine walking you to your quarters at night, stealing a kiss when you least expected it. He’d thought about how you’d taste, whether or not you’d kiss him back or if you’d smack him hard across the cheek.

He’d never know.

“You didn’t answer my question.” He almost didn’t hear you speak, your words were so quiet, fading.

Poe laid back in the grass with a heavy sigh, refusing to take his eyes off of you, like you would disappear if he looked away for even a moment. He knew you were only a figment of his imagination, that he could conjure your image whenever and however he wanted, but it wasn’t something he was willing to risk just then.

He needed you. He wanted to hang on, hold onto you for as long as he possibly could, and he refused to let his focus waver, refused to lose you all over again.

Maybe that was the real reason he wasn’t sleeping.

“Do I ever smell something that reminds me of home?”

You nodded, picking another blade of grass, tying it in a knot over and over again. You always liked to fidget.

Dirt, rain, freshly brewed caf — they were all scents that never failed to bring him home, always put him straight back on Yavin no matter how far he wandered.

But Yavin wasn’t home.

When Poe thought of home, he thought of the smell of the sea. The salt and the sand. That fresh scent after it rains, when steam starts to rise off hot stone.

Smoke and ash.

He flinched again, the memory of an explosion still so vivid in his mind.

But he supposed it was only fitting for you to be taken out the same way you were pulled in.

“Poe-”

“Sorry, sorry,” he sighed, shaking his head as if the simple action would actually work to clear his mind.

Did he ever smell something that reminded him of home?

“Not anymore.”

#poe dameron #poe dameron x reader #star wars #tros #poe dameron fanfic #flyboy

[amethystpath-writes]

I loved your recent drabble Dragged by the Ankle! Do we maybe get to see some of Villain's training in the woods? ~tears-and-lillies

Aw shucks! Thank you; glad you liked it! It was a little less training and a little more surviving ;) Very long, but I think it's appropriate to be so. Slight gore warning: animal attack, can see the bones, mention of blood, survival (in the woods) situation- whump of minors

Continuation of this

******

"I'm thirstyyyyyy," one boy complained as the group continued walking.

Villain wondered how long it'd been since they'd been outcasted. He recalled the way Hero's face changed; from worried and scared to...to stone cold, emotionless. He didn't think he'd ever forget that face, the face of indifference, as if Hero didn't even care about him anymore.

How could that happen? How could they have been so close, been so happy being brothers, all for Hero to just...abandon him? Walk him out in the woods with a group of other kids and say 'Fend for yourselves. And if you live through two weeks, you can come back'?

Villain couldn't understand why his older brother suddenly didn't care at all. He knew Villain wouldn't survive out here in the woods like this. He'd been housebound for several months, taking care of their deteriorating mother. Any muscle Villain once had was nearly gone. He wasn't skin and bones per say, but he couldn't wrestle a bear, that was for sure.

"Quiet, now. I'm going to teach you all something." It was an older boy, maybe sixteen, whereas Villain was fourteen. This boy had been a captain's son. Guess he wasn't living up to the Captain's standards. "Sh, sh. Listen, alright?"

The boys went silent. Most of them were under the age of ten. It was ridiculously unfair they had been sent to the woods. It was unfair that any of them had been, but who could send a child to fend for itself in the woods, somewhere far away from civilization, far away from help? 'Strength in numbers' Hero had said before setting them off. 'Stick together and more of you will live as opposed to if you split up'. A true soldier's lesson. These boys weren't soldiers though. They were just boys.

"You hear that flow of water?" A collective nod of heads. Villain stood nearby, but also a little separated from the group, leaning against a tree. "Which direction do you think we need to walk to find the water?"

One kid began humming in question, but the eldest put a finger to his lips, whispering again, "Listen. You have to be quiet in order to listen."

Another boy raised a hand.

"Not yet. Let the others think of an answer themselves." The oldest hummed himself, and the boy from before nearly corrected him before the former finished, "When everyone has thought of an answer, put a thumb up, alright? Then we'll all point where we think."

***

"You're really good with them," Villain said. "The younger boys."

The sixteen year old shrugged. "Thanks, I guess." He gave a small laugh. "I'm not used to interacting with them in that way. I guess it's just the way I always wanted to be treated."

"In any way, you're good at it."

He nodded, muttered another small 'Thanks'.

***

They were on their fourth day. Villain considered the sixteen year old a friend. He was closer to his own age than anyone else. He was kind and he was a good leader. Villain aspired to be him in some fashion. Not entirely, because Villain liked his own identity, but he wished he was stronger, more capable like Friend.

It was night now, and Villain couldn't sleep as everyone else did. He kept thinking about Hero, about how much he missed his older brother.

They had always been so close. When Father returned home, Hero would always take Villain out to the cliff edge. There, they would forget about the day's stress and aggravations. Sometimes they'd throw what little sand they could find at one another. Villain smiled at this memory, smiled at remembering the way they laughed together and the way, when he began to tire, Hero would lie down and Villain used him as a pillow. They'd watch the sun set over the waters then walk home.

There was a groan, and Villain looked over at the group of boys with raised brows. Friend sat up and Villain nodded, having figured out who it was.

Friend stretched before asking, "Have you slept at all?"

Villain shook his head. "Restless mind, restless body."

"You haven't been sleeping very much. It's going to catch up with you." He stood, stretched, and walked over to Villain before slinking beside him against the trunk of a tree. "What would help you sleep, huh?"

Villain shrugged at Friend. "Nothing that can actually happen."

"What is it?"

"I want my brother to be here with me."

Friend hummed. He did that a lot. "I could be your brother. Wouldn't be quite the same, I know, but if you think it would help..."

Villain huffed. "Don't force a relationship on my behalf. I'll get over it."

"You're angry," Friend observed aloud. "Your brother let them take you away, didn't they?"

Now Villain laughed. It was an ironic laugh, one that presented his anger further. Really, he didn't know he was angry until Friend said it. But it was true. He was angry with Hero, not just saddened by him. "My brother is the one who led us out here."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

***

Several more days passed and Villain was struggling. His thirst was quenched; the boys traveled upstream, always having water on hand as long as they could make a fire, and they could. The lands were dry, though not so dry as to start a forest fire. A general campfire was easy. It was the hunger, though, that dug at Villain.

There were seven boys in the group, including Villain and Friend, and it was only those two that were successful in capturing rabbits, squirrels, and fish, but it happened so seldom that Villain hadn't even had anything to eat. He gave it all to the younger children. Friend did the same, except he had one fish for himself, in the middle of the night once, to maintain his strength.

***

Another day. Another night.

The boys were walking, all of them a bit tired from the journey, but persevering nonetheless. They were going to settle in a bend of the river, a 'comfy spot' the younglings said. Villain knew it was because it reminded them of the hugs they missed from their mothers.

Friend held a hand up, shushing the group. There was a howl somewhere in the distance, but if they could hear it, it meant it was too close. They'd never had to fight a predator before, even after a full week.

"Wolves," Friend said. "They don't travel alone; they travel in packs, like us." Villain liked this comparison. They weren't boys, were they? They were all wolves, too. But which pack was stronger?

The boys scrambled about, crying with worry of death. Friend did his best to calm them down, but ultimately it was Villain who succeeded in doing so.

"You don't want to be wolves, do you?"

Some still crying, the majority shook their heads. Others just listened.

"Did you ever hear about these creatures called monkeys?" They nodded. "They don't live around here, but we can make them exist. You want to?" Again, they nodded. "Good," Villain smiled. "Good. Monkeys climb in trees, alright? So that's what we have to do."

One boy, the youngest, asked, "What noise do they make?" He was one of the few who hadn't been crying. He seemed to not understand what was going on around him. He played with a twig in his chubby hands.

"Noise? Oh no. They don't make any sounds. That's a myth."

The boy squinted, but accepted it.

More howls sounded. They were getting closer. Villain looked to Friend. He felt very terrified all of a sudden.

Friend said, "Up you go, in the trees." The boys began jumping for branches, but weren't able to reach. Before helping them, Friend said to Villain, "Genius thinking, brother." He clapped Villain on the back before helping the smallest up a tree first.

That hollowness Villain felt as his fear increased settled just the tiniest bit. He smiled at Friend. Not a forced relationship, after all. They were brothers and they would continue to be after this second week was over.

Villain moved to help some of the others as well. They'd nearly all gotten up, except for the middle child in the group of five younglings. And, of course, Villain and Friend were left as well.

Helping the last up, Villain heard a low rumble. At first he thought it came from his stomach, but then the rolling continued, and a quick snarl made itself heard. Slowly, he turned his head, and as he did so, his eyes stung. There, between the trees crouched a beast of grey and brown fur. Villain froze. He wasn't even sure that he was breathing. Could he breathe? Would it trigger a fight response in the wolf?

Friend, having already finished with his group of kids, tiptoed as slowly as he could manage to Villain. He whispered, and it made the pit in Villain's stomach double in size and despair, "Get him up there, slowly, quietly. No sudden movements, you hear me?"

Villain said nothing, but began to nerve strikingly push the child up through the air. The wolf howled and Villain's shoulders and arms tightened. He felt tears building up in his eyes before they slid down his cheeks. He didn't bother wiping them away, afraid- again- that the action would cause the wolf to attack. I don't want to die. Please don't let me die.

Another howl. The wolf was calling the rest of the pack, telling them that it found food. A shudder traveled through Villain and he flinched. I thought wolves stuck together at all times.

"Go up the tree, Villain. You're going to be okay. We'll get out of this."

Villain's watched the wolf's ear twitch as it heard. It began taking slow, cautious, and predatory steps closer to them. Every time Friend spoke, it would approach faster. Their voices were a taunt to the beast.

Nodding, Villain reached up, grasping a thick branch before pulling himself up, but he wasn't strong enough. His body jerked down as his arms gave. The wolf let out a startling bark, pounced forward a bit.

"Shit," Friend spat out, grabbing Villain under each arm. "Grab it," he said, panicked. "Grab the branch!" Villain did as he was instructed, and this time Friend helped push him up.

Several howls followed Villain as he climbed up. He spotted the boy he helped up as he tried looking for whatever wolves were approaching. He'd forgotten it wasn't just him and Friend who were facing death.

Villain looked down just as the first wolf lunged at Friend. "No!" Thankfully, Friend had rolled out of the way before the wolf's teeth could sink in.

"Come on! I'll pull you up! I'll pull you-" Friend's hands grasped one of Villain's while the other held the branch he jumped up to grab. Not in time, though. The wolf clenched its jaws on Friend's calf, yanking him with one vicious pull to the ground.

"Friend!" Villain could hear the grunts, the hollers, the snarls, and the rips. Villain couldn't watch. He couldn't watch. There was blood and- and no. No, that's not a bone. Friend screamed again and again, sometimes at the wolf, sometimes at Villain.

"Stay in-" Scream. Punch. Thrash. "Stay in the trees!"

Don't die. Don't die. Don't die, don't die,don't die-don'tdiedon'tdie. Please don't die. Villain couldn't handle both of his brothers disappearing from his life. And not like this. Not like this.

A massive wave of fury struck Villain in the next moment. If it weren't for Hero- he let out a holler of frustration. If it weren't for Hero, he wouldn't be in these woods. Friend wouldn't be in these woods. None of these kids would be in the woods, hiding in trees to avoid being eaten by wolves. Villain was willing to bet Hero had never seen a wolf before, much less fought one.

The screams stopped. Villain screamed, cried, punched the branch he sat on with both fists until they felt swollen and bruised. And then he fell asleep, exhausted, and not willing to think of the horror he just witnessed.

***

The boys slept in the trees. The wolves left. After Villain had fallen asleep, the other wolves arrived, scratching at the trees, whimpering that they couldn't reach the delectable bags of flesh and meat stowed away, hidden behind leaves.

When Villain woke, he saw two piles of clothing, each stained with blood, both containing hard and thin objects called bones. Two piles- so one of the children had fallen prey, too.

Villain threw up in the stream over and over, pouring himself out, tears and stomach acid alike. "I can't do this," he gasped. "I can't do this."

But he could. And he would. Because Hero needed to pay, and Villain would be the one to collect.

******

Part 3 here

#thanks for the ask! #request #request fill #whump #whumpee #whumper #original work #animal attack #slight gore #blood #bones #whumplr #writeblr #good villain #mistreated #long post #traumatized child #trauma #survival #hero x villain #hero x villain story #revenge #tragic backstory #I'm so bad at tagging gosh #whump of a minor

[bobohunn]

Lean On (Prologue)

Pair : Baekhyun x you, Baekhyun x female reader

Genre : Fluff, Angst, Friends to Lovers series

Word Count : 984

Taglist : (Please tell me if you want to be added or removed!)

Links :

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Main Masterlist

xx

While taking in the scene of the beautiful sun slowly but surely making its way up the horizon, you moved closer to the man beside you and placed the side of your head on his broad and toned shoulder. You closed your eyes as the brilliant golden ball in front of you extended its rays in every direction possible as far as it could, in an attempt to reach for the sparkling dust in the darker part of the skies. Little by little, you could feel warmth crawl from your toes to every last inch of your skin.

“Thank you for bringing me here, Baekhyun.”

You felt his shoulder rise against your jaw only for it to drop back down immediately. You pulled your head away a bit to get a better view of the expression that sat on his pretty face. Baekhyun’s gaze was on something far away, but with the way his pupils shook, you were sure that he was holding himself back from moving his eyes to stare back at yours.

Oh, the things you’d do to have him look at nothing but you and only you.

“I should be thanking you. Thank you for coming with me [y/n].” He muttered, still looking away.

You were already confused enough, but when Baekhyun finally moved to stare back at you, every single thing inside you jumbled up into a mess.

“Baek, what’s wrong?”

He smiled at you, “And I’m supposed to be asking you that.”

If it were possible for your eyebrows to knit more, they probably would have, but you were already at your limit. You couldn’t be more confused.

“I know you’re not okay. I wanted to ask you if something’s wrong, but I already figured you wouldn’t tell me anyway,” Baekhyun said.

A chuckle left your lips before your elbow playfully bumped his arm to conceal the pain that was starting to grow inside your chest. You wanted to say something. You wanted to tell him that you were okay and that nothing was wrong. But you knew within yourself that he was right. You were not okay. Everything in your life was wrong, and your whole existence felt like a terrible mistake. And he was right— he always is, that you wouldn’t admit any of that out loud anyway.

You pushed yourself from where you were seated and stretched your arms over your head, sideways, and to your back. Baekhyun watched your small form move around. He took the time to adore every part of you. Your face was decorated by your chocolate-colored eyes that turned hazel whenever the sunlight hit them, your small button nose that he was sure was red and swollen, and the pretty border of your smile that was your lips. Your arms swayed gracefully against the sea breeze, imitating how the water moved in waves towards the shore. And your little feet left subtle prints and evidence of life walking on the sand.

“Let’s go home,” you said with a yawn, the spirit of sleep entering your system despite moving around to get rid of it.

“Until when are we playing this game, [y/n]?” He said almost too softly for you to hear.

“What?” You asked him to repeat what he said. But it wasn’t because you didn’t hear him. In fact, you heard him clearly, although you wish you didn’t. You wanted to act as if you didn’t know where the situation was headed to. You wanted to act as if you didn’t know how it was about to end up being you wriggling yourself back to your painful reality of desolation. After all, it’s always been exactly like that— but still awful every single time.

“Until when are you gonna hide and act like you’re completely and perfectly fine when it’s obvious that you aren’t?” Baekhyun’s eyes were glistening, and you didn’t miss the way he crumpled the sleeves of his hoodie in his fists. It was as if he were holding onto them for his dear life, afraid that if he would let go, he’d fall into an endless pit of darkness.

You purse your lips so your tongue could fish out an answer from your brain. But even your mind ran out of words to say. Ironic, isn’t it? You’ve been in the same situation more times than you should have, yet you still didn’t know what to do nor what to say.

Baekhyun saw your troubled expression. If it were any other day, he would have just wrapped his arms around you, smoothed out the lines that formed on your forehead with his slender fingers, and kissed the top of your head. But today, he wanted you to find an answer, not for him, but for yourself. It was time for you to quit playing games. Because all along, it was only you who was getting fooled.

“You already know I can't stand using people,” you said with a shaky voice.

“When did I ever say that you have to use people, [y/n]? Why don't you just lean on others? On me?” Baekhyun’s voice raised a few notes higher. He was getting frustrated, not mad, though. It was frustrating to know that you were unconsciously hurting yourself to spare others from pain.

You breathed through your nose and smiled a little, “It’s the same thing, Baek. Leaning onto you and using you.”

Baekhyun moved a step closer to you, closing the little distance left between the both of you. He was so close that his breath fanned your cheeks. He looked straight into you with what seemed like a mixture of anger, sadness, and something you haven’t seen nor felt before. Probably something like love.

“What if I want you to use me, then? Can’t you just lean on me?”

You shook your head and lowered your gaze to the ground. “That’s why I’m leaving.”

-

#Baekhyun #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #bobohunn writes #exo fluff #exo fanfiction #exo baekhyun #baekhyun fics #angst #exo

[tamiettitami]

for this month's recommendations, i decided to go with the theme KISSES GALORE in honour of valentine's day. all of the below works have been posted in the month of february 2021 and hand selected by me <3

Sowing Discord by @chronologicalimplosion

A group of hyper-religious, homophobic protesters on campus ruins David's post-lunch good mood and he sends a half-joking message to the LGBTQ+ Discord server about staging a counterprotest. Constant lurker Patrick comes running.

Rated T for TEEN & UP AUDIENCES; 4,089 words; M/M; TAGGED for Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Original Characters, Alternative Universe, Alternative Universe - College/University, Homophobia, First Kiss, Epistolary, kind of

"This work features the inclusion of messages sent in Discord channels, a social media app I've never seen interrogated into a fanfiction piece before. The perfect balance of humour as well as tenderness makes this the ideal read to round out the month of love."

falling into place like dominos by @davidbrewer

Alexis spins the bottle and Stevie doesn’t know if she wants it to stop in front of her, or if she’s hoping it points literally anywhere else. She thinks she’ll figure it out when it stops moving, but… even with the neck of the bottle unmistakably pointing at her foot, she still can’t identify what the feeling is. Is that happiness or dread settling in the pit of her stomach? Since when do those completely different things feel exactly the same? If she’s being honest, though, it feels like a combination of things. It’s that feeling you get right before you do something you know you might regret later… like throwing back a jello shot (which she wishes she had done), calling an ex at 3am, or maybe jumping out of a plane.

David and Patrick hold a second housewarming party, this time at their newly-renovated cottage. For old times' sake, they decide to play spin the bottle. Meanwhile, Stevie has been wrestling with her feelings for Alexis since she left for New York... and it never occurred to her that those feelings could flow both ways.

Rated M for MATURE AUDIENCES; 4,897 words; F/F; TAGGED for Stevie Budd & Alexis Rose, Stevie Budd/Alexis Rose, Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Post-Canon, Lesbian Stevie Budd, First (Real) Kiss, Alcohol, Spin the Bottle, Queer Themes, Sexuality Crisis, (Although it's more of a frustrated confusing than a crisis tbh)

"The author's ability to voice every character (but specifically Alexis) will never fail to astound me; their inner voice for Stevie is the most notable in this work, however. Even the friendship/sibling dynamics between David and Alexis and as well as Stevie and Patrick are absolute perfection. One of the best 'Housewarming' codas I've ever endulged in and I can confidently says so."

Until I Lose My Breath by @the-kellephant

How could she have missed the fact that she was in love with Twyla?

Rated T for TEEN & UP AUDIENCES; 814 words; F/F; TAGGED for Stevie Budd/Twyla Sands, Friends to Lovers, First Kiss, Femslash February, Bisexual Stevie Budd, Lesbian Twyla Sands

"A lovely introspective piece about sapphic feelings and how they can often be blindsided by denial if not provided with the proper care or attention."

You can Stand Under my Umbrella by @agoodpersonrose

David thought the day couldn't possibly get any worse. But then it started to rain.

43. You both reach for the last umbrella in the store on a rainy day.

Rated T for TEEN & UP AUDIENCES; 2,721 words; M/M; TAGGED for Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Alternative Universe - Canon Divergence, Tumblr Prompt, Meet-Cute, First Kiss, First Meetings, Awkward Flirting, Kissing in the Rain, Umbrellas, Fluff and Humour, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Prompt Fill, One Shot

"I have nothing to say besides this is hands down the most cute way this prompt could've been filled and I applaud Becca for her ability to write such tender moments in a way underlined with laughs."

Ten Tender Kisses by @cheesecurdsgravyandfries

Ten drabbles featuring ten tender kisses.

Rated G for GENERAL AUDIENCES; 1,110 words; M/M; TAGGED for Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Fluff, tender kisses, Canon Compliant

"Reading this was pure joy. The happiness I felt from the first drabble continued to grow the longer I scrolled which is truly a beautiful feeling. Their banter is so perfectly in character and the dynamic the author has created between David and Patrick is a skill I envy."

I Didn't Know it was a Crush, David by squigmistress

David and Patrick arrive home after The Premiere and David wants to talk more about some of the wild stuff Patrick said when he was high on pain meds. What he doesn't expect is Patrick's big, gay feelings. But damn, does he love him for it. OR Patrick needs emotional safety to process some feelings and, of course, David is more than happy to hold him through it.

Rated T for TEEN & UP AUDIENCES; 1,548 words; M/M; TAGGED for Patrick Brewer/David Rose, david rose - Relationship, Queer Themes, Coming Out, Episode: s06e05 The Premiere, Coda, Feelings, Feelings Realisation, Gay, Canon Gay Character, Family Issues, Intimacy, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Anger

"Now, I've always been a sucker for introspective works, but this took it to a brand new level. It's such a fine needle to thread; however, the author does an astounding job at cataloguing the growth/development of Patrick's emotions."

Be your remedy by @jessx2231

Patrick closes his eyes and brings to mind all the times David has put on music while Patrick is engrossed in a book or his phone or even the occasional weekend work task. Eventually, David will slink into his space, just enough to rest his head in Patrick’s lap. He doesn’t always do so with the intent to fall asleep, but it’s usually not long before Patrick’s fingers involuntarily find their way into David’s hair — much like they are now — and David’s breath will even out for a while.

He can definitely make an abridged version of that happen.

Or, David can't sleep and Patrick helps.

Rated G for GENERAL AUDIENCES; Creator Chose Not to Use Archive Warnings; 2,048 words; M/M; TAGGED for Patrick Brewer/David Rose, Fluff, Established Relationship, Canon Compliant, Post-Canon, Married Life, very mild descriptions of depressive symptoms, but really just some very soft sleepy boys

"A warm hug is the best way I can describe this. Also, I already knew I need a Patrick Brewer in my life, but this solidified that."

the paths that your eyes wander down by @anniemurphys apart of falling in love at a coffee shop by them, @thankstwy, and @landofsonlali

Written for the prompt: "Twyla and Alexis reunite in NYC."

Alexis finds Twyla at a tiny corner table.

Rated G for GENERAL AUDIENCES; 568 words; F/F; TAGGED for Alexis Rose/Twyla Sands, Post-Canon

"The absolute perfect romantic comedy moment paired with some of the most in-character Alexis dialogue I've seen in awhile, not to mention how beautifully the mutual pining is broken."

a sense of expectation hanging in the air by Anonymous (i'll add the author once reveals are out for the Season 7 collection !)

Stevie starts to realize she has feelings for Ruth. How long though, will it take for her to tell Ruth that?

Rated M for MATURE AUDIENCES; 6,548 words; F/F; TAGGED for Stevie Budd/Ruth Clancy, Stevie Budd & Alexis Rose & Twyla Sands, Stevie Budd & David Rose, Stevie Budd & Patrick Brewer, Alexis Rose/Twyla Sands, Post-Canon, Getting Together, Sharing a Bed, Cuddling & Snuggling, Making Out, Fluff, Texting, Female Friendship, Episode: s07e08 RMG, Workplace Relationship

"The support from Stevie's friends—Alexis, Twyla, David, and Patrick—is so incredibly lovely. Despite the secret crushes, Stevie and Ruth refuse to let anything get in the way of them getting together and it's such a wonderful thing to see them immediately all-in the relationship."

got a fistful of four leaf clovers by iphigenias

Two weeks before Christmas Alexis calls David.

“So I think I like someone,” she says.

Rated T for TEEN & UP AUDIENCES; 1,754 words; F/F; TAGGED for Post-Canon, Getting Together, Femslash February, home is a place AND a person!

"Alexis's slow burn of building feelings for Twyla melts my heart. That being said, the realistic depiction of the difficulties that come with change provides a certain depth to this story it needs."

#schitt's creek #schitts creek #david rose #patrick brewer #stevie budd #twyla sands #alexis rose #david x patrick #david & patrick #stevie x alexis #stevie & alexis #twyla x alexis #twyla & alexis #twylexis #fic recommendations #fanficiton #*lolrecs #schitt's creek fic #february roundup

[venusandromedadjarin]

Cuyan

Ch. 11, A Glint of Beskar

18+, TW: rape, non/con sex discussed, trauma, 2.4k words

The familiar sound of the hatch opening wakes you up later that night and you groggily reach for the baby, only to find him asleep and squished between you and the back of the couch. He coos softly, disturbed by your sudden movement, and you do your best to get up without jostling him more before heading outside. One of the pit lights is on and it gives you a clear view of the bounty that Mando is currently manhandling onto the ship. It’s a young woman, and she doesn’t seem to care that Mando is easily twice her size as she turns around, struggling against him trying to kick at him. Her knee makes contact with his groin and he does his best to not show weakness, but you see him tense before shoving her the rest of the way into the ship. The gas hisses, and you figure it’s safe enough to walk towards the ship, your heart pounding with excitement. He’d been gone less than a day and you already had an ache in your chest from missing him, and worrying about him hunting.

He meets you at the bottom of the ramp, his helmet tilting towards you. You can’t see his face light up at the sight of you in the t-shirt, his t-shirt, that you’d been sleeping in, your arms crossed over your breasts. His gloved hand reaches out to you, and as soon as you take it he pulls you into his chest, his strong arms holding you up against the cold Beskar.

Even though your relationship had started to change, the one thing that remained was comfortable silence, and as you led him back inside, you both wordlessly thanked the Maker for that.

Naturally, Mando isn’t there when you wake up and neither is the child. You take the brief break to freshen up in the sonic shower, doing your best to clean off without water. Unlike the shower in the Crest, it’s not a place you want to stay long and you quickly get out and get dressed. Peli actually has a mirror in her bathroom, and you fuss with your hair for a moment before deciding on a braid. As you make your way through the quaint apartment, you spot a cup of caf on the kitchen counter, a note underneath: In the hangar with Peli, don’t come into the ship. -M At first, you’re a bit taken aback, but then you calm your racing thoughts, realizing where they were heading was not likely. The caf isn’t the best, but the warmth spreads through you and eases your anxiety about the information you plan on sharing with Mando. After talking to Peli, you know that she’s right. He does deserve to know. But what strikes you the most is what she said about him and how he acts around you. Smiling into the cup, you take another sip before padding out into the heat of the day. The suns are already high in the sky and it’s blindingly bright.

A pit droid is trembling on the ground and the child tries to terrorize it, even though he’s half the size of the machine when it’s standing up. His eyes grow larger, something you still are surprised by, when he sees you and begins to waddle toward you as you look around for Mando and Peli. Her shrill voice is coming from inside the hull, and you hear him sighing as one of them bangs on something inside. Scooping the kid up, you approach the door but hesitate, remembering the note.

Almost like he can sense your presence, Mando steps into view, effectively blocking your path before you can peer inside, “Good morning.” If you didn’t know better, you’d guess he was smirking. “I like this.” He reaches a gloved hand towards your hair, his fingers running down the length of the braid before giving it the smallest tug, sending a whole new warmth through your core.

Blushing, you step back, achingly aware of the child in your arms watching the interaction, “What are you doing with Peli?” It comes out more shrill than you’d have liked, and he notices the implication right away, tilting his helmet towards you, his hands on his hips.

“Nothing. I’m taking you on a detour,” he pauses, looking down slightly… almost sheepishly. “I-if you want to go. She said she’ll watch the kid.”

You can’t help the grin that spreads across your features before whispering, “Just the two of us?” He nods, his hand coming up to tilt your chin up to him as he steps closer, his thumb dragging over your lower lip and making both of you breathe slightly heavier.

“Just the two of us,” the modulator cracks out his whisper.

The moment is quickly broken by the sudden fussing in your arms as Peli comes down the ramp, the little womp rat struggling to get to her. “Hey kiddo!” She takes him from your arms, smiling warmly before nodding her head towards a jump speeder suited with bags, “You two better get going.” Mando reaches out to rub the kid’s ear between two gloved fingers before taking your hand. As he mounts the bike, a giddy excitement pools in your belly and you settle behind him, pulling on the leather jacket and scarf that was laying on top of the bags and wrapping your arms around his waist. He doesn’t waste a moment before lurching out of the docking bay and racing towards the dunes, the two suns high above your heads.

Mos Eisley speeds by, the tan buildings all but blending into the sand colored landscape. You lean your cheek against Mando’s shoulder, his cloak giving a small buffer between your skin and the Beskar. You feel him sigh contentedly and you smile, watching as the sand swirls underneath the speeder.

After what feels like hours, and judging by the suns probably was, you make out structures in the distance. The closer you get, you start to see the shapes: giant, bulbous rocks that almost look like… mushrooms. You gasp and he chuckles in front of you. “Is that,” you yell over the wind whipping around you, “the Mushroom Mesa?” His helmet nods against the wind, but his modulated voice doesn’t answer you. As he enters the structures looming up on all sides, you let go of his waist and sit up, throwing your arms up, whooping out of joy. In front of you, you hear the most beautiful sound burst the modulator: his laughter. Even with the modulation you can hear how lovely it is, and at that moment you think it’s the best sound you had ever heard but aching for the day you could hear it unobstructed. He races between the rocks for a few more minutes before finding a spot to camp, one that’s easy to guard but also easy to leave.

He dismounts from the speeder, taking your hand and squeezing it, “Do you know how to speak Tusken?” You nod, your brow creasing curiously, waiting for him to elaborate. He lets go of your hand, moving to unhook the bags behind you before gesturing widely with a sweep of his arm, “I’m going to set up camp, and you’re going to go ride through here. If anyone stops you, it will be Sand People and I trust you can handle that.” He reaches down to grab a blaster, tucking it into your waistband, “Just in case. Be careful.”

The smile you give him before speeding away is dazzling.

It had been years since you felt the wind through your hair like this, and it brought tears to your eyes.

The rocks are gorgeous hues of reds and tans, the shapes carved out from millions of years of erosion. You catch glimpses of movement a few times, but nothing stops you as you race through the structures, dodging rocks and leaning with the movements. You don’t know how long it’s been by the time you begin to make your way back to the camp, but the suns are lower and sinking fast.

A medium sized fire is burning and there’s a small lean to next to it, blankets spread out under the cover. Mando is waiting for you when you arrive, his hands clasped behind his back and in the dim, soft light, you can’t help but gawk at him. Even with pounds of Beskar on, you’re struck by how handsome he is, though you’ve never seen your face. Smiling sadly as you dismount, you wonder if you ever will.

“How was it?” His question holds the smallest amount of amusement as he leads you to the blankets, sitting down with you and pulling you into him, tossing the blaster in your belt to the side. “You must be starving.”

Taking the food he hands you, and watching in awe as he lifts his helmet enough to eat without hesitation, the realization of how much he trusts you strikes you suddenly. “It was gorgeous Mando. Thank you.” You lay your hand on the Beskar on his thigh, wishing you could feel his warmth. The rest of the meal passes in pleasant silence, his helmet coming down soon after and before you both settle back to look up at the stars. “Can you identify them? With the helmet?”

His body shakes with a silent chuckle, “No, but my father taught me a lot of the constellations when I was a boy.” He points some of them out, drawing the shapes with his fingertip as you watch from his side, stricken by the sky. His fingers gesture towards the moon, pointing at each one, “That’s Ghomrassen, Guermessa and the last one is Chenini. Do you see the cloud over us?” He waits for your confirmation before whispering, “Ibac cuyir te ka’ra.”

“The whole galaxy?” Mando’a lacks a word for galaxy, but you recognize the context in which he uses stars and look at him, only to find him already looking at you.

“Part of it, yes.” You gaze at each other for a few moments before reaching up to cup the side of his helmet, making no movement to remove it and he flinches until realizing it’s not your attention.

“I need to tell you something,” you push the words out before you can think twice. “About before.”

“Before..?” You’ve never heard him seem so confused and it shocks you before elaborating.

“Ner oyay.” My life.

He only nods as you remove your hand, turning to look into the flames. Taking a deep breath, you begin.

“When I was very young, you know that my home on Nevarro was ambushed during the Clone Wars. The attack wiped out everyone, except me for all I can remember. I remember being put into a cellar with the little boy I used to play with, but he was taken from me and I continued to hide, afraid of the explosions I could hear; the screams were deafening. I waited for hours, too afraid to move from behind the boxes in the dark.

“When Teckla finally found me, I was too terrified to speak to her. She carried me through the rubble and she did her best to shield me from seeing-“ you break off abruptly, sucking in a quick breath and trying to calm your nerves. When you start again, you make extra effort to slow down. “She did her best, but I still saw everything. My parents never even made it away from the cellar.

“I didn’t talk to her for over a year. She tried so hard to fix things for me, take me in and love me but I wouldn’t let her for so long. Even her last words and her last actions were trying to protect me-“ a sob escapes from your throat, and you shakily wipe tears away from your face, not even realizing you had been crying. You can’t bear to look at him, but you feel his gaze on you as his arm tightens around your waist. “A group of Quarrens attacked our hut in the middle of the night, lighting our house and our neighbors’ on fire. Teckla forced me out of it before I even knew what was going on, but by the time I got to the speeder, it was too late and they killed her right in front of me before shooting at the engine. When I crashed, I vaguely knew what was coming. I had heard the stories.

“As the guy slammed me up against the building, there were screams around me, but I wasn’t strong enough to pull away to help. I wasn’t strong enough to fight. So he took me, multiple times as I watched helplessly as people died and women were raped. At some point, I think I lost consciousness, either from the pain or just out of sheer panic. I woke up in a hut surrounded by other women, all of us were bloodied and out of it. No one knew where we were.

“I honestly don’t know how long I was there. I just remember the pain,” you take another shaky breath, the tears still rolling down your cheeks but he doesn’t move. “Eventually I was moved to the encampment but I didn’t realize at first that I wasn’t going to be abused anymore. All I saw were these men trading me for money. It was probably the best thing to happen to me at that point though, but I was so weak that I couldn’t fight at first. For weeks, I dealt with verbal abuse as I tried to get better, at least well enough to be in the arena. Part of me knew it would get worse if I didn’t figure out how to get in there.”

You laugh a humorless laugh, “Red is actually the one who helped.”

He spoke so softly you barely heard him, “Red?”

“The bounty you went back for. She’s the only one that stayed the same over the years. Even though she was horrible, she was the only one who I knew through it. She saved me in some ways.” Gazing into the flames, you huff, “Dank Farrick. How messed up is that?”

Making no move to leave your side, he stares at you quietly. You wish you could see his eyes. “Say something,” you whisper, suddenly afraid of his silence and what it might mean. You curse yourself, terrified of the repercussions of giving him this information.

His next words bring new tears to your eyes, “Cyare, gar cuyir cuyan.”

Beloved, you are a survivor.

#the mandolorian x reader #the mandolarian #reader x din Djarin #din djarin reader insert #din djarin

[vannahfanfics]

Net of Hopes

Category: Angst

Fandom: Kingdom Hearts

Characters: Kairi, Sora

Hey, hey, everyone! I’m back at it again for @sokaiweek​, this time for the Day 6 Prompt, “Celebration”! I decided to combine it with a prompt I didn’t use from last year, “Tanabata,” because who doesn’t love the Tanabata Festival? I hope you all enjoy it!

A cool breeze rolled in from the sea, chilling the muggy, warm July air as it whisked through the streets. The wind ruffled the hem of Kairi’s pink, rose-patterned yukata as she stepped outside, and when it leaped up to frisk at her auburn strands of hair with nimble fingers, she tucked her long tresses behind her ears to keep it from getting in her face. After saying farewell to her parents, Kairi closed the door behind her and paused to cast her gaze to the sky, where the heavenly river of the Milky Way shone in all its glittering brilliance. Tanabata was meant to celebrate the star-crossed love of Hikoboshi and Orihime, who met once a year on the shores of the heavenly river. 

I wonder when our “one day” will be, Sora, she thought, a mournful smile tugging at her lips. She felt like Orihime, trapped upon the shore reaching out with all her might to her beloved but unable to touch his outstretched fingertips. He was somewhere out there, wandering the shores of other worlds like a ghost, and she hoped that someday he would find his way back to hers. 

The toami nets hanging from the eaves above Kairi’s head rustled in the endless breeze, beseeching the salt spray for a good fishing harvest in the coming year. As an oceanic community, much of the commerce depended on the sea’s bounties, so the little basket-like paper creations littered the buildings during Tanabata. Smiling wanly, Kairi reached up to brush her fingertips over the blue paper structure. Maybe she should cast a net of hopes this year, and pray that she reeled in the boy she’d been missing oh-so-sorely. 

Kairi closed her eyes as she breathed in deep, and the salt tickled her nose. Its tangy scent and taste reinvigorated her a bit, and when she opened her eyes again, she was feeling a little less mopey. I promised that I would wait for you, however long it takes, she reminded herself. I can’t be impatient. 

With that promise in hand, Kairi set off for the shrine. 

The buildings were littered with colorful paper creations all swaying in the endless breeze. Strings of paper cranes entreated longevity and a fulfilling life. Kuzukago baskets wished for a sense of tidiness and thrift, the discarding of waste. Kinchaku purses had been strung by those imploring wealth, not only for the wallet but for the mind. Everyone had something to wish for, something to petition to the gods above— and they were all filing toward the shrine, dressed in their best yukatas and bringing their hopes with them. 

Kairi merged with the river of hopes, where she shuffled along under the care of the breeze and the paper crafts swaying within. 

The shrine was tucked away against some tall cliffs, a semicircular arrangement of rocky walls facing the sea. Thick groves of bamboo lined the sand pathway all the way up to the shrine and surrounded it like a crown of green. On the path, vendors had set up shop, advertising various wares and foods. Though not particularly hungry, Kairi found herself sitting on the stool in front of the takoyaki vendor’s counter, watching the balls of batter fry in the pans and enjoying the scent of octopus and chives wafting around her. 

Takoyaki has always been your favorite, right, Sora? She giggled to herself as a memory surfaced, the image of him with his cheeks stuffed full of octopus balls and sauce dripping from his lips. They’d sit at the takoyaki booth for nearly an hour as he ate plate after plate, conversing amicably with the vendor and praising his cooking. 

Strangely, the vendor didn’t ask about him, just handed her the plate of takoyaki with a friendly smile. She ate them in silence, and though they were exceptionally delicious as always, they just didn’t taste quite as good without Sora’s comically stuffed cheeks and hums of delight. 

After finishing her takoyaki, Kairi bid the vendor a good night. It had done her well to sit and eat a while, as the crowd around the shrine had thinned some. She waited patiently in line until she arrived at a small wooden table set up beside the shrine, where colorful strips of tanzaku paper and black markers rested. She picked a blue one and shuffled off to the side to write her wish. Yet, as she set the marker to the paper, her mind went blank; the dark ink spread in a circle underneath the tip, but she could form no words. 

What did she want to wish for? Honestly, a thousand different things. She wanted to wish for him to come home. She wanted to wish for him to be safe. She wanted to wish for him to be strong. Tears blurred her blue eyes as emotion welled up inside of her, and she hastily wiped them away with the sleeve of her yukata. Now was not the time to cry. 

She had promised that she would wait, no matter how long it took, and she couldn’t resent that promise. That promise was her gift to him, a gift to get him through the hard times. 

Kairi took a deep breath and looked down at the paper. Then, she simply wrote, Wishing you well. 

Smiling, she capped the marker and then grabbed some string, looping it through the little hole punched in the top of the tanzaku. She carefully strung it from the bamboo among the thousands of other wishes, filling the green fronds with a rainbow of vibrant pleas to the heavens. A net of hopes, rustling in the sea breeze. 

Though most didn’t stay until midnight, Kairi did. She meandered around the festival, playing the various games and visiting the different food and merchant booths. She bought herself a pretty hairpin that matched her yukata, a rose with pretty pink strings of beads that blended well into her auburn locks. She went back to the takoyaki booth because honestly, he really did have the best food. She played a goldfish-scooping game, and though she didn’t win, she really just liked seeing the pretty golden-red fish swim around in the plastic tub. 

Finally, the time neared midnight. The remaining festival attendees gathered in front of the shrine. The tanzaku had been stripped from the bamboo stalks and piled into a small pit, where a festival moderator waited with a lighter. As the clock struck twelve, they all started up in song: 

“The bamboo leaves rustle, shaking away in the eaves.

The stars twinkle on the gold and silver grains of sand.

The five-color paper strips I have written.

The stars twinkle, they watch us from heaven.”

With a flick of the lighter and a spark of fire, the tanzaku were ablaze. The flames jumped high, little sparkling embers fluttering around before dying with one last orange spark. The paper strips curled up and turned black as they burned, and the smoke rose above their heads, swirling up slowly toward the stars. Kairi watched the gray-white wisps with a hopeful smile. 

She cast her net of hopes, burned her wish with the faith that the gods heard her prayer. And here she would wait with the knowledge that her wish would spread through the stars across worlds and reach Sora. 

I’m wishing you well while I wait for you, Sora. But don’t keep me waiting too long, okay? Next year, I want to make my wish with you. 

Enjoy this oneshot? Feel free to peruse my Table of Contents!

#sokai #sokaiweek #sokaiweek2021 #sora x kairi #kairi x sora #kingdom hearts

[danishmiilk]

if it isn’t too late 💋💄

pairing || mark lee x fem!reader

au || best friends to lovers!au

genre || fluff; angst

word count || 2.2k

warnings || swearing (i think)

summary || your best friend leaves for Canada, taking a piece of your heart along with him. you liked him, but rejected him. is it too late for you to take him back?

“are you really going to Canada?”

“yeah. i’m going to college there, remember?”

you sighed, having repeated this conversation more times than you’d wanted to the previous week. letting your eyes land on mark’s apologetic expression, you lamented the fact that you’d never gotten to do what you’d always wanted to before he left. he hadn’t left, not yet, but you’d never have the courage to do it, never again. 

“y/n? don’t cry, okay? i’ll still be back every summer to spend time with you.” 

it’s not the same, you thought, but merely sighed and leaned back against the headboard. your best friend sat on the opposite side of the bed, looking at you like he was sorry for his choice, but at the same time didn’t regret it. there was a hint of sympathy and sadness in his posture, and something else, almost longing. you shrugged it off, merely reaching over to hug him before saying, “let’s move on to a happier topic, okay?”

it was hard for you to accept that your best friend for all eighteen years of your life was leaving for Canada, oceans away from you. you’d tried to come to terms with it, but imagining a lifetime without mark was almost awkward and impossible. 

you’d miss the late-night talks, the all-nighters before exams, the walks on the beach and the times you’d played together in the kindergarten sand pit (even when you’d both graduated.) you’d lament about not being able to attend college with mark, and only being able to see him once a year.

but most of all, you’d lament that you’d never gotten to tell him your secret (and you were sure, unreciprocated) feelings for him. you’d planned to tell him this year on his birthday, but on that same day when you’d finally been able to gather the courage to confess, he’d dropped the bombshell on you. you decided there was no point in confessing to him, because even if he did reciprocate your feelings, which you sorely doubted would happen, you’d only be able to date him for two months. fate didn’t allow for a relationship between you and mark, you thought. 

and so you pushed the feelings away, back into the depths of your heart. where they’d stayed for a very long time. where they would stay for a very long time. 

you swore to murder whoever had woken you up at this ungodly hour. it was 4.a.m. in the morning, for god’s sake. who was even awake at this time? and who was awake and free enough to come and wake you up? grumbling in the dim light, you slapped your failing right arm lazily around the bed before finally managing to find your phone (and hurting your pinky).

squinting to let your eyes adjust to the light of your phone, you clicked on the sinning chat. 

mark lee 🥰🥳

- hello hellooooooooo

- meet me at the swings in the park please i have something important to tell youuuu

me

- can’t it wait please?? it’s like four am in the fucking morning

mark lee 🥰🥳

- nooooo i’m leaving in two weeks we don’t!! HAVE!! TIME!!

not having the energy to do anything other than leave him on read, you stifled a yawn and pulled on a sweater with blurry vision. you weren’t sure if you’d even put it on correctly, but you were too tired to care. 

after a face wash, you’d gotten slightly more awake and managed to gather the will and motivation to drag your tired limbs to the park which you’d spent most of your childhood at- and the place where you’d met your best friend for the first time.

cliche as it was, you halted your steps and rocked to and fro on the spot when you saw the boy waiting for you. a hoodie and jeans, with the hood pulled over his hair- very typical clothing for mark. he was just sitting on the swing, twisting the chains around each other then letting them go, spinning himself around on the swing. an admittedly childish act, but… he was so beautiful. you cringed inwardly from the cheesiness of your thoughts, but your heart sang a different song. 

your heart was happy, its beat erratic. you felt as if you were reliving the time so long ago, the time that you fell in love with him. the scene was almost perfect, perfect for a late-night confession. you didn’t want to get your hopes up, though. he was leaving in a fortnight. if only he wasn’t. if only.

the leaves that were blown into your face by the autumn breeze elicited a squawk out of you, alerting mark to your presence. searching his face for anything other than his usual awkwardness for a hint on why you were called here at this hour, you saw nothing but a hint of nervousness, uncharacteristic of mark. 

“so? what’s the matter, mark?”

the ever-present smile on his face suddenly vanished. fiddling with his thumbs, his shoelaces, the hem of his sweater and everything else, before finally speaking softly and haltingly, “well, i’ve kind of… liked you? for a while now? like a few years? and i’ve never been able to tell you this but… i’m leaving soon, and if you reject me then i can just… leave and… maybe it won’t hurt so much.”

“and what if i reciprocated your feelings?” you asked in a whisper. 

“you wouldn’t.”

“why are you making decisions for me? i do. i do like you back. i have for a long time now,” you reached your hand up to wipe moistness from your eyes, unsure of why you were even crying in the first place, in relief or regret, “we’ve wasted so much time.”

a hopeful expression began to show on mark’s face, like the sun peeking out from behind the storm clouds, “so… will you be my girlfriend, then?”

your heart broke. you wanted to date him, but at the same time you didn’t think you’d be able to handle a long-distance relationship. “i… can’t. it’s the distance. you’re going to- to- Canada. i’m staying here. i can’t handle this kind of relationship. and fate- fate obviously didn’t mean for us to be together. if it’s sending you off to Canada and it’s leaving me here… its intention was never to let us enjoy any relationship other than friendship.”

when disappointment flashed across his face, you nearly dropped everything and took back what you just said. “it’s- it’s fine- i just thought we could try at it- nevermind,” mark shook his head, “it was a stupid idea, forget i said anything. anyway… i’m sorry for calling you out here so late. i’ll just get going.”

i’m sorry, you thought desperately, i’m sorry. i’m sorry i’m not strong or brave enough to attempt a long distance relationship, i’m sorry i’m not courageous enough to take risks. having known mark for such a long time, you read him as easily as your favourite childhood book, and now, sadness and heartbreak were written in his every step. away from you.

you didn’t feel like going home, not yet. sitting down on the same swing mark had been on just a few moments ago, you resented fate in that moment. you resented it for sending mark to Canada, and for pulling the two of you apart. you could have had a ridiculously cute best friends-to-lovers kdrama plot, you could have enjoyed a nice, normal relationship, but fate didn’t allow for it. 

understandably, neither of you tried to contact each other for days. the cloud of sadness that seemingly followed you around wherever you went got denser and denser, until your grandmother who was here to visit knocked on your door one day. “y/n, dear? can i come in?”

“how did it go with mark?” you’d told her about the crush you’d had on mark, and how he’d called you out in the middle of the night. when you just shrugged in response, she pressed on, “did he reject you? i thought he’d called you out to confess. the boy’s always liked you, you know. we could all tell.” 

it was the last straw for you. you crumbled and cried into her shoulder, feeling like a little girl once more. the two of you sat there in silence for a few more minutes, your grandmother running her fingers through your hair. when you’d calmed down, you looked at her with tears in your puffy eyes. “he… didn’t reject me,” you whispered in horror, “i rejected him.”

the gasp of shock your grandmother sucked in beside you did nothing to elevate your sentiments. “but… why?” your tone hardened, sadness turning into unadulterated anger, “fate won’t let us be together. it’s sending him to Canada, while i stay here. it’s the first time i’ve fallen in love, and yet i still can’t experience a relationship with my first love. it’s not fair. there isn’t any way we can be together.” without realising it, tears had begun to fall again. you wiped them away furiously, refusing to cry again. “i wish there was,” you said, detached, voice barely audible. 

your grandmother looked contemplative for a moment before beginning to speak slowly, “but that’s true! you don’t know when you’re going to be able to find a love like this ever again! when you find something like this, how can you let something little like fate get in your way? take this love and run away with it!” her voice began to escalate at the end, face shining with enthusiasm. you wondered momentarily if that was what she did with your grandfather.

“so you’re saying that… i should try to reconcile with mark, and we can give it a shot at all this relationship stuff?”

“yes. now go! you have a boyfriend to get!”

the world suddenly seemed five shades brighter as you grabbed your things, ready to leave, when your phone screen lit up with a notification.

calendar: mark’s flight today at 5pm! do not miss!

“fuck. his flight is in an hour’s time,” you panicked, trying to tie your hair up with your shoelace which was inconveniently lying on a table. (you hadn’t been focusing much on room upkeep ever since you rejected mark.)

your grandmother didn’t even bother reprimanding you for your less than appropriate language, instead slamming her hand down on the bed with more strength than you thought an eighty year old woman would have. “what are you waiting for? go get your man! grandma’ll be waiting for you right here, so you better come back with good news.”

you raced through the halls of the airport, nearly knocking over five people, a stroller and a pet carrier, adrenaline pumping through your veins like it’d never before. you’d almost failed all your runs for phys ed in school, but you suddenly felt like usain bolt. you didn’t have time. mark’s flight was leaving in fifteen minutes, and you didn’t know when would be the next time he returned.

after an eternity of running, you arrived at the doors of the departure hall, where you saw a figure saying goodbye hurriedly to his family. you felt your lips tug up in a fond smile - it was just like mark to be borderline late. “mark lee! MARK LEE! LEE MINHYUNG!”

he turned around to look at you quizzically. “y/n? i- i thought you wouldn’t come. aren’t you still- aren’t you still mad? because of that night?”

you knew your hair looked like a mess, your clothes crumpled and makeup nonexistent, but mark was still looking at you like you’d hung the stars. you grinned. “what kind of a best friend would i be if i didn’t come to send you off? however…” apprehension filled mark’s expression at your last word, only causing your grin to grow as you continued, “i’d prefer to be your girlfriend.”

you didn’t think your grin would be able to grow even more, but it did as you saw mark’s face morph into shock and elation. “yes, i’m serious. i was dumb and stupid and i’m really sorry but i’d still like to give this a try-”

cliche as it sounds, he kissed you to shut you up. the media portrayed first kisses wrongly, you thought. it didn’t feel explosive or anything really shocking, but it was special. it felt right, somehow, and your soul had been yearning for this for who knows how long. so you kissed him back.

you’d lost track of how much time had passed, but mark’s brother taeyong suddenly coughed very loudly and awkwardly. “right, we’re all happy you’ve finally gotten together and all because watching you dance around each other like idiots was the worst thing i’ve ever had to do and i once had to wake up sleepy hungover yuta, but mark’s flight leaves in five minutes and i think he needs to go.”

you pulled apart hurriedly, smashing your nose against mark’s chin in the process. “bye, i love you, take care in Canada, don’t die, and talk to me!”

“call me!”

neither of you knew what the future held. but if you’re together, it’ll be alright. it’ll always be. and someday you’ll meet again.

#nct-writers #dreamwritersnet #neothestars #starryktown #kpopscape #nctcreations #mark #mark lee #nct mark #mark imagines

[schrijverr]

Careless affection hit me hard

Five times Bertie calls Jonny ‘love’ in the British way and one time in the in love way.

AKA Jonny is a gay disaster and gets overwhelmed by any sort of affection.

On AO3.

Ships: Jonny x Bertie x Tim

Warnings: none, but tell me if I missed anything or if you want me to tag something!

I got this idea from @ohwormhere who was kind enough to let me use it, so thank you!

~~~~~~~~~

One.

Jonny was rummaging through Berties pack. He was planning to steal some booze and didn’t really care the the owner of said pack was looking right at him while he did it with one eyebrow raised and an amused look on his face.

Bertie shook his head when Jonny went on with stealing and sighed: “While you’re going through there, could you at least hand me the cards, love?”

And just like that Jonny froze.

He knew Bertie didn’t mean it like that, he’d heard him call Tim darlin’ enough for him to spot the difference in tone. Bertie was just British, he couldn't help it, probably.

But still that didn’t mean, Jonny didn’t freeze. His one hand was still in the pack, other halfway to the ground where he was about to steady himself.

Jonny only came back to life when he almost toppled over, barely catching himself and getting the attention from Bertie, Tim and TS, who were waiting on him.

“You alright there, mate?” Tim called out.

Trying to hide his furious blush, Jonny turned away, focusing on getting the cards, booze long forgotten as he replied: “I’m fine.”

Two.

The first time it had happened was still playing heavily on Jonnys mind, when the second time almost killed them all.

They were in a trench shooting in the dark, hoping that the aiming at the noises would enough to make it through the day. Jonny was, much to his dismay, on laser fuel duty, which meant keeping his hand in a crate so that he could quickly hand over ammunition and no one had stumble around in the pitch blackness.

Bertie made the sign for more ammunition and Jonny quickly handed it over, making a small noise so Bertie would know where he was.

After a bit of groping the air, Bertie found Jonnys arm. He slid his hand down to Jonnys and took the fuel with a quick: “Ah, thanks, love.”

Because of this Jonny missed The Toy Soldiers request, but luckily it would survive, well come back from, the hit in the head that followed and by the time Tim asked for fuel, Jonny was out of his stupor.

Three.

It happened again a few days later.

The Toy Soldier had heard a stupid order and, in a moment of irritation, Jonny had followed after it to tell it to come back. However, he had lost The Toy Soldier rather quickly and also the way back in the dark.

He had been trying to get back to the British front lines for a few hours already and in that time he had only found a Lunar Men stronghold. It had been a nice temporary distraction, but whatever was left hadn’t given him any clues about his position.

So, now he was just walking in a direction and hoping it was the right one. He was about halfway into a new passage when he heard a familiar voice say: “We’re not going to find them, Bertie-dear. Lets go back. You know how those two idiots can be, they’ll come back when they want to.”

“I am worried, darlin’.” another familiar voice replied, “Because I know how much of an idiot those two can be.”

Jonny wasn’t going to let that slide, so he called out: “Oi, I heard that, fucker.”

There was a momentary silence of surprise, then Tim exclaimed: “Jonny!”

The two soldiers rushed over to his voice and with a dim flashlight Bertie checked him over for injuries. When he found none, he grinned and patted Jonnys cheek: “There you go, love, all alright.”

If there hadn’t been a dim light the heat alone would have been enough to give away how much Jonny blushed at that statement. He cleared his throat and groused: “Yeah, yeah, I’m always alright,  so whatever. There’s, well, there was a Lunar Men stronghold further up, we should go inform the sarge of that.”

Jonny didn’t miss Tims grin as he slung an arm around his shoulder and pulled him along while he said: “Whatever you say, Jonny.”

Four.

He thought he would be over it by the fourth time it happened, but no.

They were playing cards when Jonny slipped one out of his hand and into his sleeve replacing it with another. With a winning smile he showed his hand and started to collect his prize. However, another hand on his own stopped him.

“Oh, you’re going to regret that, love.” Bertie told him, looking him straight in the eye.

Jonny almost fainted at the sight and sound, but he managed to swallow around the sudden lump in his throat and focused on whatever it was Bertie was holding in front of him.

An ace of hearts.

Fuck, he thought to himself, that had been the exact card he had switched in order to cheat. Caught in the act, red handed.

Tims stupidly handsome face appeared in his view, with an annoy smirk on it. He jeered: “You going to move, or is Berties hand that interesting?”

“What?” Jonny asked, finally blinking.

“You’ve been sitting there staring for a while now.” Bertie told him gently, “I was getting worried about you.”

Tim leaned over Berties lap and rolled his eyes: “You worry to much, Bertie-dear. Lighten up a bit, the fucker has survived this far, little card game won’t kill him. Besides, he still needs to pay up.”

“He’s Quite Right, Ol’ Chap.” The Toy Soldier interjected, “Mx. O’Reilly Would Be Very Disappointed In That Horrifying Display Of Cheatery.”

“Sometimes, TS, I really wish you would keep you’re mouth shut, you know that?” Jonny told it, swiftly ignoring Tim, whose hair Bertie was now carding his hand through. He didn’t know who he was more jealous of and the fact that he was made him nervous.

Apparently that wouldn't sit right with Tim, Jonny suspected this was more due to the fact that Bertie shared everything with Tim, so him not paying up also affected Tim then anything else, but still.

Tim sat up and draped himself over Jonny as he told him: “Go on, be a dear and pay up, Jonny.”

He put an emphasis on dear and with one look to his face Jonny knew Tim must have noticed his reactions to the petnames, unintentional as they were. It didn’t help his case that his cheeks lit up once more, so he just shoved Tim off him with a “Piss off,” before handing Bertie the booze they had been betting.

Five.

When it happened again, Jonny knew that this time it was on purpose. It wasn’t hard to figure that one out.

The accidental endearments had stopped after the cards-incident and Jonny was already missing them, which he kind of hated himself for. Tim and Bertie were happy together and he was just being stupid over nothing.

Anyway, back to Bertie. Jonny had been waiting for another accidental ‘love’ out of Berties mouth and desperately trying to ignore Tims looks as well as the growing nervousness in his chest as if he were a blushing school girl.

It happened again in a well lit area and Bertie was watching him intently the whole time, which is how Jonny had gathered it was on purpose, making a pit appear in his stomach.

He had almost fallen over, since he wasn’t looking where he was going too busy keeping an eye on Tim, scared of what he might do with the information Jonny knew he had.

Bertie luckily caught him before he befriended the floor and made a fool out of himself. He looked Jonny in the eye earnestly and asked: “You alright, love?”

The effect was immediate, much to Jonnys horror. His cheeks turned into roses, and it crept over his nose, down to his neck as he stuttered an affirmation.

All the while, Bertie was cataloging his reactions like he was merely an interesting animal at the zoo instead of a soldier in a very dangerous situation, namely on the brink of being found out about his stupid feelings that he didn’t want anyone to know about.

He saw Bertie take a breath, probably to let him down gently and Jonny didn’t want to hear it, he couldn't take it. So he snatched his arm back out of Berties grip and hightailed out of there.

“Well that went shit.” he heard Tim say in the background, making him increase his pace.

+ One.

The problem with dramatically stomping away in a small war camp is that there aren’t many places to go and if he wanted a comfortable place to sleep, he would have to face Tim and Bertie once more.

He’d contemplated to just leave and try to find The Toy Soldier, who had gotten lost again to the other side, but thought better of it. He couldn't leave Bertie and Tim without his protection.

So, after he had sulked alone and had come to terms to the embarrassing rejection he would have to face eventually, he made his way back to their tent.

Tim and Bertie were already sitting in front of it and Tim lit up once he saw him and waved. Bertie perked up as well and smiled and waved too. Embarrassed and confused Jonny waved back softly, before making his way over.

Arriving he looked to the ground and scuffed his foot in the moon sand, biting his lip as he waited for the verbal impact of words slung his way.

“I didn’t mean to make you upset or uncomfortable, I swear.” Bertie began after a few seconds of silence.

Jonny head snapped up with a frown and he said: “I was going to say that.”

“What, why?” Bertie asked.

Beside him Tim facepalmed and groaned: “I thought I explained that to you. God, you are both so stupid.”

“Hey!” Jonny exclaimed indignantly, jabs from Tim were at least more familiar territory.

“Not helping, Tim, this is exactly why I am doing the talking.” Bertie told him, then he turned to Jonny, “Just ignore him. What I meant to ask is: why you would say that?”

“Why do you want to know?” Jonny asked, suspicious the moment he realized the other two had planned this conversation, even if that shouldn’t really come as a surprise seeing that they were together and had discovered he was crushing on them.

“Because you didn’t do anything to make us- uhm, me uncomfortable and if the reason is what we expect it is then I can tell you it’s alright.” Bertie explained gently.

“What reason do you expect?” Jonny asked, still on guard, since he suspected the something they suspected, but that seemed insane and out of reach.

“Well,” Bertie began carefully, “if I am correct, and do tell me if I’m not, but if I am correct it would seem that the logical conclusion from the evidence is that-”

“Oh my god, just hurry the fuck up. Ugh!” Tim groaned, “We think you like him and maybe even me or you have the most serious case of touch starvation I have ever seen and then I will give you a hug right now, in both cases actually.”

Jonnys eyes grew wide, both were dead on. Was he really that easy to read? He wondered faintly, before the blood rushing to his head took over and all he could say was: “Ah- uh- oh- uhm- yeah- well- you see- uhm. Yes?”

“Yes?” Bertie asked.

“Uhm, yes, to- to both- or all, I guess?” Jonny stammered once he had regained a bit more coherency.

“Oh, come here, love.” the tone was different, Jonny heard instantly how it sounded more like Tims darlin’ than before. Bertie held his arms open and Jonny just collapsed in them. It seemed almost unreal that this was where this whole debacle had lead, right to the safety of strong arms and a soothing hand on his back.

He felt Tim draping himself over his back, before he whispered in his ear: “I knew you cared, sweetheart.”

The blush on Jonnys face increased in heat once more, but he didn’t deny it. Why would he, when he knew Tim and Bertie cared too?

#RR writing #The Mechanisms #the mechs #Jonny d'Ville #bertie (the mechs) #bertie x tim x jonny #Bertie x gunpowder Tim x Jonny d'ville #gunpowder tim #the toy soldier