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#i'm sorry but what the fuck!!!!!!!! the high note!!!!!! how DID that even happen!!
ange1ace · 2 months
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DONT YOU LOVE ME ANYWAY?
tw: slapping, slight breeding kink, smut, dark!luke, corruption kink, daughter of aphrodite!reader
a/n: from your #1 yappist
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There was something sacred about it-how he would desecrate-ruin you. Bruises littered your inner thighs, neck, anywhere he could find to mark you. Own you.
And he did.
There was some thrill in it for him, that you'd allow him to fuck with you like this, turn you into something as depraved and corrupt as him. Watching the guilt settle in your eyes when he finishes fucking you, mock disappointment crafting his words.
"should cover those up, yeah?, cant have everyone knowing what a cock dumb slut you are now, can we?"
People began to notice it, slowly. The way your face would burn with embarrassment turning into shame when they pointed out the hickeys. The fact that you were luke's toy to fuck and use as he pleases. And it was, until it became because even after he betrayed you, its his name that falls from your lips when you cum on your fingers.
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You shouldve known better. Maybe checked the borders harder, more than twice-brought more weapons. Anything, that would take you back from being here. The metal presses against your throat, sending shocks of fear through you as he tilts your head up, back pressed against the rough bark of the tree.
Clarisse and the others had left camp for some special mission, chiron called it, leaving you and the other year rounders. It was calm for the first few weeks, until it wasnt.
Monsters started attacking more frequently, breaking the borders which you couldve sworn you thought could never happen. And there was only one culprit. The same one that had his head between your thighs-just weeks earlier and now a knife under your chin.
"isnt it past curfew sweetheart?" he asks tilting his head as he smiles "should report you for that"
Like the fucker cares.
Your eyes scan your surroundings, looking for atleast a dagger, seeing most of your weapons discarded too far from arms reach. He sees you, of course, eyes darkening in irritation.
"None of that yeah? just want to talk-"
Something in you clicks, anger that causes you to almost bite at him. "now you want to talk? you fucking left me luke!, no note, not even a simple goodbye-i had to hear about this from annabeth, a-and you want to speak to me with a sword at my throat?!"
He shifts, eyes moving to unreadable, as he backs up only slightly.
"There wasnt enough time-couldnt get you roped up in this shit and risk somethin' happening to you, you wouldnt have understood-"
His words fall on deaf ears, not caring-trusting-what he says anymore. You're quick to move, acknowledging that his sword is now at his side, completely out of the way. The first fist hits and you cant tell when the second one reaches. He lets you hit him, takes it until it actually begins to hurt, grapping your wrists as you attempt to fight his grip. He discards his sword on the ground, moving his other hand to keep you still. "Stop before you hurt yourself" he says sternly, backing you right up against the tree. Theres tears on your face now, he cant tell if they're from sadness or anger, choosing the latter pains him less.
"Just calm the fuck down"
Its the same tone he would use with you before, whenever you'd ask him to stay with you after he'd fuck you for hours on end. Producing the same result, tears brimming along your waterline until his tone changes. "I'm sorry okay? just dont-dont-fuck- stop crying, cant take it when you do that to me"
Your lip stops trembling, soaked eyes looking up at him as his hand cradles your chin. Its silent, none of you knowing what to say anymore and even though, you know better, you kiss him. Your lips are soft against his at first, but when luke gets over his shock? he's all teeth and blood. Violent and angry and so so desperate. Your brains in a fuzz, a high from the way hes kissing you. Maybe you've spent too long alone since he left, maybe you should've moved on. But whatever it is that leads you to do something like this, you're to fucked out of your brain to care.
Fuck elysium, he's got his own little heaven right here, in the way you sculpt your lips into his, letting him find solace in you after everything. His hand reaches to the curve of your waist pulling you into him, as he begs you to let him go further. To fuck out his frustrations onto you once again. He's sick for even asking, and you? you're just as bad for agreeing.
He practically rips of your skirt, ruining the pretty lace hem, muffling your protests with his lips. "I'll but you ten, okay a whole fuckin' set after-"
A promise you know he's not going to keep, but for now, you let him have it. His hand trails over your panties, pressing the damp spot he sees there. "That desperate huh? been waitin' for me princess?"
Somewhere in your stupor, your lips form into a pout.
"Dont be silly"
His lips form into a smirk at that, slapping your clit from your tone as you yelp. "Yeah? you've just been whoring yourself out since ive been gone?-looks like i needa remind her who she belong to hm?"
Another slap connects at your silence.
"Y-yes-fuck-please-n-need it so bad-" you babble out mindlessly, pushing your hips up into his hand-a desperate attempt to get some friction. He chuckles at your neediness, like his cock isnt leaking through his pants right now. He pulls your panties to your knees, fingers teasing at your hole, gathering your slick before he's sliding both inside of you. The sound you make is pathetic, giving him exactly what he wants, to see you pliant and indigent for him again. He's not slow or careful, instead fucking you with his fingers like hes almost enamored with the motion.
"L-luke-!" you whine, when you feel his other finger pinch your clit, the stimulation making your body jolt in pleasure. "I know, baby, I know-'s really abandoned her didnt i? dont even know how much ive missed this pretty pussy"
His words are so sweet, an illusion for how fucked up this all is. He continues to pump his fingers into you, feeling how you tighten up around him as his hand goes back to circle your clit. Your hips buck up into his hand, letting him use it as motivation to move faster. Head falling back, feeling the familiar tightening in your stomach as whimpers emit from you, eyes rolling back in pleasure. Your brain goes white when you cum, thighs trembling as you clamp down on his hand. He pulls out of you, watching the wetness that drips down your thighs.
"theres my girl"
He's quick to pull out his cock, all angry and red, precum dripping along his veins. He rubs his cock along your thighs, shivering at the feeling. He's slow at first, easing himself in, until he fully enters you, a wheeze coming from him.
shitshitshitshitshit-shit-" his thighs quiver, jaw clenching from holding himself back. "g-gotta relax for me, mami-fuck-"
He buries his head into your neck, gritting his teeth as his hands tighten on your hips. It take everything in him not to just rut into you right there.
For your sake, he tries to be slow, be patient as he thrusts into you at an antagonizing, gentle pace. You mumble something under your breath, begging him to go faster, to ruin you again, to break you. And he remembers that really? he was never a patient man.
His hips snap into yours, his movement prompted from that primal need to fill you with him to the hilt. Its disgusting, lewd-almost pornographic sounds that come from you as his curls stick to his forehead from sweat. He fucks you like an rabid animal, harsh, violent and angry-he doesnt understand whats wrong with him-why he needs it so bad. To feel you clench around him, scream out his name as if everythings normal again, as if he's human again. He presses against your stomach, causing a mixture of a moan and a sob to come from you, as he moves against you faster-harder.
He's on cloud nine when you clamp down on him. Hips stuttering, choked out whimpers falling from him as he buries his face back into your neck to try and stifle his sounds. Stars dance across your vision, and you swear you're drowning-mouth formed in a permanent 'o' shape, thighs trembling as you sink deeper. Crash after crash of ecstasy hits you-coming in relentless hard waves that make you see white. Your speech is slurred, rambling about how you love him so much-need him so much, begging him not to leave you again.
And thats what pushes him over the edge. He knows hes gonna leave you again, abandon you like the piece of shit he is, but the reprieve he has is too good to deny. He cums with a fucking sob, your name echoing from him like a solemn prayer, not even recognizing the fact that he just came inside of you as he holds you to him.
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He cleans you up, carrying you back to the aphrodite cabin. Lucky for him, its empty. Most of the year rounders being in his old cabin. Laying you down on the bed, as your eyelids flutter, he sits on the side of your sheets, watching your face until you fall asleep.
And whether its guilt or regret, this time he stays and holds you until he disappears in the morning.
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bread--quest · 5 months
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It's 2012 somewhere. Welcome.... to Night Vale Tumblr.
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👁️ nvcr-official
Hi guys! I'm Intern Sarah! Excited to be joining you all!
👁️ nvcr-official
To the friends and family of Intern Sarah, she was a good intern and social media manager, and we are sorry to see her go. We will work to find a new intern as soon as possible.
83 notes
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🦉 dark-owl-records
CALL OUT POST FOR CECIL PALMER
hes gotten away with shit for too long and im sick of it. tl;dr horrific intern mistreatment with no compensation, mountain denier, homophobic
keep reading
❌ number-one-moonhater Follow
Hey uh. Aren't you a company account? Why are you posting this
🦉 dark-owl-records
L + ratio + god forbid women do anything + your music taste is trash
🙈 seesomethingsaynothing Follow
Isn't Cecil literally gay?
🦉 dark-owl-records
he's homophobic
🪼 jeebyfish Follow
he has a husband...
🦉 dark-owl-records
yeah and he won't fucking shut up about it
2,500 notes
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🤫 cecils-private-blog
Carlos hasn't liked any of my woodcarving posts in THREE DAYS!! I'm so scared what if he's going to break up with me :((
👁️ nvcr-official
Cecil he's your husband he's not breaking up with you. also this isn't a private blog you just put private in the url
🤫 cecils-private-blog
HOW DID YOU SEE THIS
4 notes
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🏜️ sandeater Follow
tamika flynn spotted in ralph's dairy aisle "slaying" the milk
🦂 scorpiansscuttle Follow
op i know this is a joke but one time i was in the ralphs dairy aisle and there was some butter up on a really high shelf and someone said "don't worry, i'll get it" and i turned around and it was fucking tamika flynn
☁️ average-weather-enjoyer Follow
fake story :/
📚 isurvivedthesummerreadingprogram
No it's true I was there
🚂 traintonowhere Follow
TAMIKA FLYNN??
🏜️ sandeater Follow
what the fuck is happening on my post
8,345 notes
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👁️ nvcr-official
can you guys please stop sending cecil weird shit... i don't want to have to explain to my boss what a dilf is
27 notes
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🐚 mariella-shella
Hey guys!! Sorry for the lack of posts recently! I entered a hole in the wall and when I got out I realized I didn't know how long I'd been in there, or where I was, or who I am, and I'm not sure that I'm still the person who entered that hole however long ago. Anyway, the normal posting schedule will resume as soon as I remember what my normal posting schedule was, and if I'm still the person who had that posting schedule!
🌪️ sandstorm-gf Follow
omg mariella!!! missed u so much girl glad ur back!
🐚 mariella-shella
i miss me too
42 notes
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😎 Anonymous asked: Response to the homophobic allegations?
🎙️ cecilpalmer
Huh??
🎙️ cecilpalmer
@nvcr-official What does this mean? Is it new slang?
👁️ nvcr-official
uhhhh dont worry about it buddy
50 notes
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🧤 missy-mittens Follow
hey guys im in quarantine for eating wheat and wheat byproducts uh...send asks?? i might be in here for a while lmaooo
🧤 missy-mittens Follow
oh lights in the sky its been 5 years since i made this post
☁️ glowcloudapologist Follow
how's it going op
🧤 missy-mittens Follow
i miss my family
506 notes
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🐚 mariella-shella Follow
hey if anyone remembers anything about the person running this blog can you tell me? trying to recover the fragments of my identity from the void of memory lol
🥔 potato-enthusiast Follow
you were really hot
🐚 mariella-shella Follow
FUCK YEAHHHHHH
89 notes
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🦉 a-weird-bird Follow
just a reminder that new residents of east night vale are fully welcome to interact with this blog!!!! you will not be harassed and any hate will be blocked. this blog is safe even if this town isn't sometimes <3
🌻 sunflowergirl Follow
This is so sweet, thank you so much! Just so you know, even though it's officially called East Night Vale now, a lot of people still call it Desert Bluffs! Just thought you might want to know :)
🦉 a-weird-bird Follow
i'm not calling it that sorry
🌻 sunflowergirl Follow
What??? Why??
🦉 a-weird-bird Follow
just kind of sucks. as a name
🌻 sunflowergirl Follow
?????????
170 notes
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🐄
⬜️ kentuckymeatshower_deactivated11051983
what does this mean....
🌌 cece-xeze Follow
another great post from huntokar herself
16,683 notes
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🚁 helicopters-in-your-area Follow
🌲 little-miss-ectoplasm Follow
you don't like pine cliff? 👻 oo ooo?
👁️ nvcr-official
NIGHT VALE SWEEEEEP
806 notes
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😁 the-happy-smiler Follow
Hi everyone!! Since Twitter went down, I figured I'd try my hand at this Tumblr thing! I'm so excited to meet all of you!! Hope you're ready for some pictures of CENTIPEDES!! Feel free to AMA about the Smiling God!
👁️ nvcr-official
I
🦉 dark-owl-records
N
🎙️ cecilpalmer
T
📚 isurvivedthesummerreadingprogram
E
🙈 seesomethingsaynothing Follow
R
🚂 traintonowhere Follow
L
🦉 a-weird-bird Follow
O
🌌 cece-xeze Follow
P
🐚 mariella-shella Follow
E
🚁 helicopters-in-your-area Follow
R
21,983 notes
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myjisung · 8 months
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stray kids : calling them pretty !
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content. stray kids ot8, gn!reader, complimenting, idol and non idol!skz, lots of dialog, insecure bangchan, confident hyunjin & seungmin, sillies — fluff.
warning. none
wordcount. 1,6k ( got carried away a little bit )
a/n. sorry, i had brainrot !!
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bang chan ( 방찬 )
"you're pretty"
"now you're just being silly."
"i mean it!"
chan looked back at you, unimpressed. his brow looked unamused and so did his mouth. he did not buy it.
"chan i promise you. you're a very pretty guy."
he shook his head and you could feel your heart break to pieces. no matter how many times you complimented him, whatever the words you chose, chan would not believe you.
"that's not a word i'd use to describe myself" he laughed dryly "i mean, have you seen me?"
enough. you got up and walked towards him. that got his attention. chan turned his face away from his computer to look to your side and you grabbed his face with both hands. shocked, his eye grew a little bigger.
"chan" your voice quivered "you have to believe me. you ARE pretty. always have been. it pains me to hear you deny it over and over again." his lower lip trembled "whatever it is that makes you believe you don't deserve to hear that word being uttered about yourself, forget it!"
he swallowed and his eyes watered.
"okay" he said after a while "alright. i-" he sighed, looked somewhere else then closed his eyes "i can't really- i don't-" another sigh "for you, i'll try."
lee know ( 리노 )
this time, after ten minutes spent trying, your facetime call went through.
"well fucking finally minho! why are you-" on your screen, your boyfriend's face appeared. he was getting makeup, a small brush softly highlighting his nose bridge "oh... you're pretty."
minho laughed gently.
"what is it that you want y/n? why'd you even call me seventeen times? can't you tell i'm busy?"
he tried to use that annoyed tone he usually threw your way when you were being clingy. but you could tell he was blushing, something that didn't happen often enough if you had to be honest.
"well damn, calm down with the questions. can't someone want to talk to their pretty boyfriend?"
another laugh, a shy one this time.
"okay, stop that"
"stop what? calling you pretty? well that's what you are. pretty pretty pretty!"
"alright i'm hanging up"
"MINHO NO WAIT."
you had to call him eight more times for him to pick up a second time.
changbin ( 창빈 )
"can you compliment me some more?"
you had just spent the last fifteen minutes telling changbin about how perfect of a man he was. and there he was asking for more? there were only so many compliments in the world. so much so that you had to think about what to say in order to not repeat yourself.
handsome you had used. super witty you went on and on about without forgetting about complimenting his dedication to living a healthy lifestyle and promoting kindness.
but then, it dawned on you. you knew just what to say.
"you're pretty."
changbin furrowed his brows.
"huh?"
"you're pretty" you repeated. "like, you're actually so pretty."
a tentative smile stretched changbin's lips.
"are you sure?" he was shy. changbin brought his hand to the back of his neck and tickled it gently—as if it was the first time anyone ever used the word 'pretty' to describe him.
"i am" you said without hesitation "you are super pretty, changbin. you've got pretty eyes and a pretty nose and pretty lips and pretty cheeks and and and..."
changbin laughed that silly high pitched laugh of his.
"you've got a pretty face overall."
"that's the first time i heard of it." he finally said, too shy to ask for any more compliments.
you mentally took note: in order to shut my changbin up, call him pretty.
hyunjin ( 현진 )
"what did you think the first time you saw me?"
you looked up from your book to lock eyes with his. that came out of nowhere. tilting your head to the side, you furrowed your brows.
"what do you mean?"
"like" hyunjin looked to the left, pondering how to word his question better "what was your first impression? when we first met, what did you think of me?"
"oh." you went back to your book "he's pretty."
hyunjin coughed.
"that's it?"
"did you expect me to think you were hot or cool or whatever? the first time we met you were drenched in soda and asked me for napkins, not very cool nor hot. but you were very pretty, the prettiest man i had ever seen."
a gentle smile stretched his full lips.
"do you mean that or are you being funny?"
you looked at him again, shocked. after marking the page you were at, you closed your book.
"no what do YOU mean? don't play with me hyunjin. you DO know that you're pretty, right?"
he brought his hand to his mouth but, before he could hide it, you saw his slight smirk.
"i mean..." he started.
"oh come on!"
"no like" hyunjin giggled "i'm aware it's just, i didn't think you'd think that of me. pretty? is that really the impression i gave you?"
"well cut me some slack here! you're a crazily pretty man. sometimes i just look at you for fun. for FUN, hyunjin! i am ENTERTAINED, i am having a GREAT TIME looking at your pretty face."
"okay now you don't have to be dramatic about it"
hyunjin was blushing crazily for someone so confident.
han ( 한 )
he was painting his nails and a look of concentration had him furrow his brow and push the tip of his tongue out of his mouth. han wanted to draw stars on each and every single one of his nails and you admired his dedication to the task.
the room smelled of both nail polish and nail polish remover. the coffee table was littered with cotton pads and q-tips drenched in acetone. the smell had your eyes water but you couldn't leave.
han was just so pretty. and you had to tell him.
"hey" you started.
"busy" jisung replied "can't mess up again."
you heard him but, it had to be said.
"you're so pretty right now."
it took him a while, maybe three or five seconds before the words registered. once he pieced it together, he looked up at you.
"huh?"
"i said, you're pretty"
"no i heard you" he started "it's just... really?"
han kept his brush above his fingers so long a droplet of pink polish splashed on his nail, ruining the design, but you didn't have the heart to point it out yet.
"yeah? you're a very pretty guy, jisung. like, your eyes for starters, insanely pretty"
he gave you a shy smile as his cheeks turned pink. you could tell he was trying to tone down his reaction from the way his leg started bouncing.
"no... you're the pretty one." he finally said.
jisung looked down at his nail and shrieked. he was going to have start over, AGAIN.
felix ( 필릭스 )
"you're so pretty"
you weren't expecting to say that out loud but could anyone even blame you? the sun was hitting felix's face in a way that enhanced his freckles along with the gold of his skin. his long eyelashes tickled the skin under his eyes and the bitten red of his mouth made him look ethereal.
felix was, objectively, a very pretty boy.
his eyes fluttered open and your cheeks blushed pink. felix noticed and a playful smile stretched his mouth.
"d'you mean that?" he asked, his voice low and gentle.
you weren't exactly boyfriend and partner yet. you weren't anything really. something in between, something blurry but neither of you dared saying or doing anything about it. you were content with this in-between, for now.
"i do" you started and he brought a hand to your cheek, letting his thumb gently stroke your skin "you're very pretty, felix"
his smile got bigger.
"thanks" he said "you're super pretty yourself."
you swore your heart leapt out of your chest.
seungmin ( 승민 )
"has anyone told you that you were pretty before?"
"plenty of times actually, y/n."
seungmin smiled playfully and you watched him, deadpan.
"i mean," he started "i get it. don't you?"
he giggled and you could only scoff. can't someone compliment their boyfriend and have him react normally in this economy?
"alright mister pretty boy. i guess you've heard it so much it got to your head."
another laugh, a bright one this time and you could not contain your own smile anymore. seungmin had this way of brightening every room he walked in. he always managed to have you in the best mood and make you forget all of your worries.
"oh no y/n... i beg, compliment me again. i only care when it's you that calls me pretty."
it was your turn to act. pretending to be unimpressed, you looked away.
"well. i better be!"
seungmin giggled again. and so did you.
i.n ( 아이엔 )
shopping with jeongin always took hours. you were used to it at this point, but still. your feet were killing you and you had spent far more money than you had planned to.
your boyfriend had a way with compliments afterall. whatever you tried on, he loved and managed to make you love too so, purchased they were!
"how about this one?"
the fitting room's curtain quickly opened and you were met with yet another huge-pair-of-pants-and-oversized-shirt outfit. it was crazy the way jeongin managed to make them work every time.
"pretty" you said "you're pretty."
he smiled and his eyes crinkled.
"pretty?"
"mh mh" you nodded "you look super pretty. you always do but especially right now. crazily pretty, insanely pretty, gorgeously pretty. extremely pretty even. have you considered-"
jeongin cut you off, pressing a soft kiss to your lips. he giggled against your mouth as you kissed back, sending happy shivers down your back.
"okay i think i get it." he said "you're perfectly pretty too"
with that, the curtain closed again.
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taglist. after being absent for a long while, i'll make a new taglist instead of using the old one so let me know if you would like to be added / removed.
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cartierre · 9 months
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HIGH INFIDELITY | cl16, cs55
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SOCIAL MEDIA!AU carlos sainz x latina!reader x charles leclerc
side note: there is implied cheating. this is based on "high infidelity" by taylor swift. side note pt2: sorry for the ugly watermarks on the youtube interviews. and for the bad quality. couldn't find better ones. side note pt3: this is so over the place i apologise.
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♡ liked by carlossainz55, charles_leclerc, francisca.cgomez and 34,293 others
yourusername veranos brasileños (brazilian summers)
view all 235 comments
user1 are you and carlos still dating be honest
user2 are we not going to address the elephant in the room? ⤷ user3 it's all just rumours why do they need to address that?
user4 okay so carlos is still liking and all... maybe we are just overreacting?
user5 miss ma'am attended one birthday of her friend alone and suddenly everyone thinks her and carlos are over? ⤷ user6 she's also not been attending any races since australia ⤷ user7 okay and? she has a life of her own? ⤷ user8 it is suspicious ngl
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♡ liked by 127,340 people
tagged: yourusername, carlossainz55
f1wag Carlos Sainz Jr. and his girlfriend of two years, Y/N Y/L/N, have officially broken up. After cheating rumours sparked the news, the couple has decided to call it quits right before the Belgium GP this weekend.
view all 1,293 comments
user9 i'm not surprised ⤷ user10 i'm actually amazed they even lasted that long after the rumours
user11 i just would've loved to see their chats after the cheating rumours hit the internet ⤷ user12 same like what happened that y/n met up with charles and carlos with isa?
user13 does that mean we'll finally see carlos and isa again?
user14 good riddance on carlos' side honestly
user15 am i the only one that thinks they were kinda cute together tho? ⤷ user16 yes
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♡ liked by charles_leclerc and 19,293 others
yourusername happier than ever
view all 128 comments
user17 omg is that charles ⤷ user18 i mean it does look like the apm monaco watch he's wearing ⤷ user19 and he is still following her and liking her posts
user20 the way she is so fucking unbothered by everyone calling her a cheater... she won the idgaf war
user21 if charles and y/n are dating now that's kind of an ass move from them
user22 at least she seems happier now? ⤷ user23 she doesn't deserve to be happy after what she did to carlos
user24 i'm laughing at how she lost so many followers lmao
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♡ liked by 92,394 people
f1wag Ex-WAG Y/N Y/L/N has been spotted multiple times in Monaco since the summer break has started. It is rumoured that she's been seeing Charles Leclerc, teammate of her ex-boyfriend Carlos Sainz Jr. However, none of the rumours have been proven right.
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user25 she's such a whore omg ⤷ user26 yeah but charles isn't any better
user27 this is so disrespectful to carlos
user28 it hasn't even been a month since their break-up and y/n is already out here rubbing her new relationship with charles under carlos' nose? smh
user29 so we were right to mistrust her from the beginning?
user30 i'm so gagged by the disrespect. this is a new low.
user31 charles went from homie hopper to collecting the ex-girlfriends ⤷ user32 he's getting the leftovers
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♡ liked by charles_leclerc, pierregasly and 21,928 others
tagged: charles_leclerc
yourusername none of you know the whole story...
comments have been disabled for this post
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soap-ify · 6 months
Text
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soap x fem! reader
soap acts mean with you after he caught you humping your teddy while he was out
wc 1.6k
cw degradation, spanking, p in v, pussy slaps, implied dacryphilia ??, orgasm denial, basically johnny being a meanie who loves mocking your voice (neil reference!!)
notes guys i only uses like little scottish vocab because i'm SCARED to try and write a scottish accent, buy i will surely do it in the future !! just don't wanna butcher it right now.
18+ under cut, mdni.
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"johnny! please, i'm so close!"
johnny's voice rang in the bedroom, laced with mockery while he purposely tried to make it high-pitched enough to mimic your voice. a wolfish grin adorned his lips as he watched you struggle on top of your teddy pink, your hips twitching and grinding clumsily, you being bare except that shirt you were wearing — which you had seemingly borrowed from him.
"f-fuck you..." you would sob out, your voice nothing but sweet despite the frustration lingering on it.
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it all had started off when johnny had caught you humping on your teddy like the needy little thing you are, loud moans leaving your lips. he had just came back home from buying some groceries, and you just couldn't control your needs for a few hours, could you?
you were an embarrassed mess once you had spotted him from the corner of your eyes as he stood at the door of your shared bedroom, his royal blue eyes watching you in amusement. you were quick to hop off your teddy and cover your botton half with a blanket, cheeks all pink whilst excuses and babbles left your lips. "sorry, johnny... didn't mean to! got so needy i just..." you whined in embarrassment, all frustrated and needy from not reaching your climax, yet somewhat ashamed at the same time for being caught.
"tch, such a naughty lil' lass you are." he clicked his tongue and folded his arms, feigning betrayal as a frustrated pout adorned his lips. "havin' fun all without me?" he grumbled under his breath, taking heavy long steps towards the bed, his eyes darkening up a bit.
"go on. why did ya stop, bonnie? don't want me watchin' you?"
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that's how you found yourself back on your cute big teddy, arms slung around the big head as you tried to steady yourself, tired legs trembling whilst your wet, aching cunt rubbed against the teddy's torso, your lips letting out soft whimpers.
"oh, come on. my baby wasn't moaning so quietly earlier." johnny chuckled and playfully delivered a gentle smack on your plush ass, his fingers kneading onto the soft flesh before letting it go, callused hands grabbing your waist and lifting you up your teddy with ease.
he was quick to flip you on your stomach and pin your down on the bed, straddling you from above. "fuckin' naughty lass, can't even fuck the poor teddy properly." he clicked his tongue, feigning frustration as his hands moved from your waist and back to your ass, right hand raising up to deliver a harsh slap that was enough to make you sob and bury your face in the soft plush of the pillows.
"what happened to oh please, johnny! or wanna cum so bad!, eh?" he sneered, using that high pitched voice of his once again. he had this sick habit of always mocking your moans and pleas, loving the way you would hide your face in embarrassment while your eyes would tear. you didn't mind it tho, did you? it was all fun, and in the end, he loved you too much to actually hurt your feelings.
"sorry... just want you so bad, can't think anymore..." you would babble in between your sniffles, head turning back a bit to look at him with those teary eyes of yours that were enough to make him melt internally.
"poor baby." he cooed, leaning down to press soft kisses on the back of your neck, your brain going all mushy at the sudden affection. "can't do it on your own, mmh? only need your johnny's cock, right?" he whispered lovingly, that familiar condescending tone lacing his words, making your hips twitch in his grasp.
you were such a mess right now, your ass stinging from the slaps whilst your cunt was a big wet mess, thighs quivering in need while tears streaked your cheeks, your hands grasping onto your teddy and pulling it next to you so you could cuddle it. "please, johnny..." you sobbed quietly, squirming impatiently beneath his weight.
johnny rolled his eyes, pretending to be exhausted of your pleas as he gripped your waist and flipped you on your back, eliciting a surprised squeek from your lips. "actin' like a bitch in heat." he clicked his tongue, his hand quick to snake down to palm your slippery cunt, his thumb pressing down on your clit. his cock was throbbing in his jeans, aching to be free though he resisted the urge, for now.
his fingers would gently dip into your folds to collect the slick precum, slowly spreading it all over your cunty. he was just filthy like that, loved painting everything in your slick. just as you thought he was going to be gentle and take care of you, his raised his hand to gently slap your needy cunt, causing you to squirm in surprise, thick tears rolling down your cheeks.
"this is what you get for not being good and touching yourself without me, m'eudail." he growled in your ear, royal blue eyes flicking up and down your splayed out body — taking in the sight of your tear-streaked face and messy hair, the shirt - his shirt that you were wearing now all hiked up to reveal your tummy, your spread out legs and your flushed cunt. such a messy thing, all for him.
"s'okay, bonnie. gonna make you feel so good that you will forget 'bout anythin' else that could give you pleasure." he grinned cheekily, hands impatiently undoing his jeans, tugging him down alongside his boxers to reveal his cock — a nice length of 7.5 inches, curved and uncut, and oh fuck was it girthy.
his hands would guide your knees to press up against your chest, your hands immedietly supporting your thighs, cheeks flushed in embarrassment while your whole cunt was in full display. "fuckin' gorgeous." he hissed, leaning down to place a soft kiss on your pouty lips before he pulled back and pressed the raging swollen tip of his cock against the entrance of your heat, causing you to gasp and tense up.
"ssh, relax. s'gonna feel so good." he whispered gently, a stark contrast from his earlier mean behavior. he would press kisses on your temple to calm you down, a shy smile forming on your lips as your sniffled, a shaky sigh leaving your lips.
"i love you..." you mumbled out softly, your hands holding onto the back of your thighs tight whilst your teddy was still snugged by your side. johnny would slowly slide his cock into your cunt, feeling your walls instantly tightening around his girth. despite his earlier actions of degrading you, he was very gentle when he was pushing himself in, not wanting to cause any wounds. all sweet, just for you.
"i love you too, lass." he grunted out, hands moving from your knees before he pressed both elbows of his above your shoulders, caging you. "fuck... just like that. so perfect f'me..." he groaned into your ear, face nuzzling into your neck while you felt his stubble tickling your sweaty skin. once his cock was all snug cozy inside your warm, comfy cunt, he began to slowly thrust in and out, hips move in an experienced manner. you both were quite the noisy onea, him grunting and groaning in your ears while you were whimpering and moaning in his ears, your eyes fluterring ship whilst your legs were wide spread. this position made his public hair grind against your clit, causing you to twitch in pleasure.
your ass was all red from his earlier smacks, all marked up by him. no damn teddy could make you cum, only him. was he really being fussy over a teddy? yes. but he couldn't help it! you were only his. his eyes would send glares to the teddy besides you before they focused back on your face, watching your brows knit in pure pleasure as his cock hit the spongy spots inside you, slamming against your cervix whilst stretching your cute cunt out — creating a nice mix of pain and pleasure that you just loved.
his pelvis continued to grind against your throbbing clit whilst his cock fastened up its pace, ramming into your cunt. your legs trembled with each deep thrust while he practically fucked your brain out, your leaking cunt tightening around him. "need to cum, please...!" you sobbed out, feeling the familiar knots tightening up in your stomach.
as soon as you were about to reach your orgasm, johnny stilled inside your cunt, slowly pulling out. you whined in surprise, teary eyes widening in disbelief as you saw a familiar mean grin forming on his lips once again, panting softing. "heh, not so fast, bonnie." he breathed out heavily, his hand giving his throbbing cock a few more strokes before thick strings of cum oozed out of his cock, spraying over your tummy and thighs.
you could only stay still and cry softly while your mean boyfriend denied you your orgasm while cumming all over you, a hoarse chuckle leaving his lips.
"bad lasses don't get to cum. now why don't you beg in that cute whiny voice of yours, eh? then i might reconsider."
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Yandere Asmodeus and Fizzarolli
With a Nifty Darling
Ps. I take requests ;)
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● You three met at Asmodeus' club.
● You had no idea how you even ended up in the club but you did and when some fucker decided to hit on you? Well, they didn't come back in one piece.
● That's when Fizzarolli and Asmodeus saw you. You were stabbing some poor sap while manically laughing as blood flew everywhere.
● Fizzarolli couldn't help but burst out laughing. Seeing a small demon stabbing another demon that was six times their size while every other demon was avoiding the murder zone was hilarious to him.
● Some idiot thought it was a good idea to take advantage of this, however, and climbed on the stage, trying to harass Fizzarolli.
● Asmodeus, of course, saw this, but before he could even act himself, there you already were, stabbing the asshole with the same little knife.
"HAHAHAHAHHA STAB STAB STAB"
● They were in love.
● Fizzarolli and Asmodeus approached you, and you stopped your stabbing when a big blue hand picked you up.
"Hello darling, what brings you to my club?"
● Your neck cracked by how fast you turned your head as your one eye got bigger and your pupil got smaller.
● Don't tell anyone, but that scared the shit out of Fizzarolli and Asmodeus (and they loved it).
"GAHAHAH, you're a bad boy, aren't you?"
● You somehow got yourself out of Asmodeus' grip and began climbing all over him as you touched and poked anything your little hands could reach.
● This amused the both of them.
● And from then on, the three of you could always be seen together.
● Let's say this setting had happened BEFORE the start of the show. Their yandere tendencies aren't that noticeable as they definitely aren't in love with each other and you. But later on? OHOHOHOO.
● Moxxie was singing on the stage for Millie under Asmodeus, Fizzarolli, and YOU interrupted them.
"Give me a thrust." Fizzarolli takes this as his que to make trumpet sounds as you climb all over Asmodeus.
"Show me some lust." Que Fizzarolli, continuing the trumpet sounds as you mischievously look down at the imps from Asmodeus' shoulder.
● Yeah, in the end, you tried to stab Moxxie but were stopped. Poor you :(
● On another note, you don't really like being at the club. Cleaning is one of your favourite "hobbies," and sometimes you get overloaded with the need to clean when you're at the club. Asmodeus and Fizzarolli, of course, take notice of this and try to keep you at Asmodeus' Chambers. (Which can be quite hard as you are small, fast, and agile).
● After the Mammon incident, Asmodeus and Fizzarolli aren't as shy in showing their love as they were before. Fucking they don't do with you, sorry honey but you are tiny compared to them, but they love you all the same. What came as a surprise to them, though, was how inexperienced you actually were.
● Before, you were gigging about "bad boys" and all that, but when they declared their love for you, you just froze and stared at them with that big ol' eye.
● Hun? Are you okay? Why did you freeze like that?
● They look at each other with concerned glances, and in a minute, you just continue cleaning as if nothing happened, muttering about "roaches" and "winning."
● Ignoring that, Asmodeus' nicknames for you are "Darling, Sweetheart, Devil's Ivy..."
"Darling ____, please let's NOT harras the staff, okay sweetheart?"
● Fizzarolli likes to call you "Doll, their highness (as you two like to play pretend sometimes), Cheshire..."
"___ be a doll and give me the powder, please?"
● Their yandere tendencies aren't that visible for others (or for you at least), but they are insanely overprotective. You can't leave the palace without THE BOTH of them.
● There was this one time though...
● You were at the club, sweeping around feverishly when you bumbed into some random sinner, and they spilt alcohol on the table.
● "Fuck you're making a mess!" The sinner yelled at you, only to freeze in horror as you begun to bawl your little eye out.
"I- I'M THE MESS?! WAHHHHHHHH!!!!!!"
● The sinner might just have peed their pants when Asmodeus and Fizzarolli ran over. They were panicking as this was the first time you've ever cried (at least in front of them), and you wouldn't stop bawling your little eye out.
● They tried to calm you down but nothing seemed to be working, not even the funny faces Fizzarolli made that usually managed to make you cackle manically. Thankfully, you calmed down as you begun to fiddle with the small balls on Fizzarolli's hat.
● By this point, the sinner had already run out, and the one's left in the club minded their own business to NOT inquire Asmodeus' wrath.
● Don't worry, little devil, Asmodeus, and Fizzarolli took care of the piece of shit that made you cry <33
You are never the mess.
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
I would like to remind everyone that Nifty IS NOT a child, though her body is small. She is canonically 22!! And is seen having sexual feelings towards other demons, so PLEASE do not come complaining in the comments!!!
Though criticism is appreciated ♡
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ladykailitha · 4 months
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Staking My Claim Part 3
Hey, guys! We're back!
Part 1 Part 2
We finally get the lowdown on what happened. Otherwise known as don't mess with Jeff.
Robin freaks out.
And Gareth is loaded. Or at least his parents are. ;)
I'm also going to try tagging the untaggables separate and see if you can't get you lovelies tagged.
@redfreckledwolf, @mira-jadeamethyst, @itsall-taken, @emly03, @rozzieroos
***
He hurried over to the phone and called Family Video.
“Hello, thank you for calling Family Video,” the soft female voice said. “How can I help you?”
“Robin!” he cried again. “I’m so sorry!”
“Steve!” Robin shrieked. “Where have you been? Are you okay? You’re not in the hospital or jail are you? What happened?”
“I’m not in jail or the hospital,” he assured her. Eddie huffed out a laugh. He whirled around to stick his tongue out at him. “I’m okay. I’m still in Indy. I just landed at some friendly metalheads’ apartment.”
“Wait...” Robin said. “Those friendly metalheads wouldn’t happen to include one Eddie Munson, would it?”
Steve looked over at said metalhead and turned away to hide his blush. “Maybe,” he mumbled into the phone.
“Hell yeah!” she crowed. “Now tell me what happened now!”
Steve pressed his lips together. “Um...to be honest...I’m not one hundred percent sure I know what happened last night. Like I remember bits and pieces, but it all kinda blurs together.”
Eddie walked over and pointed to the phone. “May I?”
Steve nodded and hand it to him.
“Robin?” Eddie asked. “This is Eddie Munson.”
“Hello, Eddie,” she said coolly. “Would you like to explain why my best friend isn’t, I don’t know, home?”
“I would love you to tell you that story if it’s okay with Steve finding out by me telling you?” Eddie questioned, looking over at Steve.
He shrugged and waved his hand for him to go ahead.
“He’s says it’s fine,” Eddie said.
“Noted,” Robin said. “Now spill.”
So Eddie did. He told her about the sleazeball at the bar who wouldn’t take no for an answer. About his daring rescue of pretending to be his boyfriend.
Steve blushed when he heard Robin go, “Awww,” at that.
Eddie grinned at him. Then he launched into the actual fucking rescue. It turned out that Mr. Persistent bumped into Steve to lace his drink with a drug to knock him out.
Steve’s eyes went wide. “He did what now?”
Eddie hummed. “Yeah...it was this whole thing. Jeff even got to punch the guy in the nose. I think the bartender has a crush on him now.”
Steve’s eyebrows went up. The bartender was a thirty something Asian dude with tattoos and piercings. But he supposed it made sense, considering the bar’s general attitude toward that specific portion of the population.
“At least he’ll get free drinks for life, right?” Robin said with a chuckle.
“That’s certainly one way to look at it,” Eddie agreed. “So yeah, this dude bumps into Steve and suddenly our friend is getting tipsy, fast. And I’ve been at many a rager to ply my wares, there was no way Keg King Steve was drunk after two beers, a margarita, and a half of a Cosmo.” The half a Cosmo was from sharing with Gareth.
Steve blushed. He wasn’t proud of those wild days in high school, but it probably saved his life in this case.
“Yeah...” Robin agreed. “I’ve seen him drink men under the table who were bigger and had been drinking longer.”
Eddie nodded even though she couldn’t seen him, but Steve could.
“Then the asshole comes over and starts flirting with Steve again, trying to draw him away,” he continued. “That’s when we really got that Steve wasn’t acting normal. So Brian steps in and tells asshole to leave him alone. But this guy has gone past persistent and into full creep territory.”
“Eww...” Robin hissed. “How did Jeff get his punch in?”
Eddie chuckled. “That’s honestly the best part, so Brian and Gareth take Steve out to my van and I go and get the bouncer. We come back and asshole is trying to get past Jeff to make his escape. So he takes a swing at Jeffy.”
“Bad idea, I’m guessing?” she said with a hint of laughter in her voice.
Steve tilted his head in interest and Eddie fought down a smile.
“Jeff’s dad is a former boxer who taught him how to fight to make the bullies leave him alone.”
Steve’s eyes go wide and Robin said, “Oooh. Please tell me he laid this asshole out! Please!”
“Dude stiffened like a board and went straight down,” Eddie confirmed. “The only downside is that they couldn’t prove anything, so he just got tossed out, but make no mistake, they’ll make sure spread the word around the other gay bars about this guy.”
“That’s good,” Robin agreed.
Steve wandered back over to his food, safe in the knowledge that he was in safe hands.
Jeff and Brian were at the counter grabbing their breakfast so Steve joined them. Coffee was was doled out by Eddie a few moments later.
Creamer, milk, and sugar were placed next to the coffee pot.
“Robin says not worry about coming into work,” Eddie murmured to Steve. “She said she would tell Keith you have the stomach flu. Which according to her will get you at least three days off.”
“That’s pretty impressive,” Brian said. “I don’t think there is anything I could tell my boss short of being in the hospital that would get me even a couple of hours off.”
Steve laughed. “Keith has a weak stomach. You just mention vomiting and the dude turns green.”
“Handy that,” Eddie said with a smile.
“It’s very handy when you’re out drinking and drink too much,” Steve said with a shrug.
“I’ll say,” Jeff said. “I’m just glad we were there, man.”
Steve blushed. “Yeah, me too.”
He dug into his food and was happy to note that while it didn’t necessarily ease the queasiness in his stomach, it didn’t make him want to throw it all back up, either.
He cleared his plate.
“So this is what’s going to happen, Stevie,” Eddie said as he cleaned up the pans from breakfast, “you are going to stay here until I am sure one hundred percent that you won’t throw up on the three hour journey back to Hawkins.”
Steve opened his mouth to argue, but he couldn’t. Right now nothing was coming up, but put him in a moving vehicle and he couldn’t say for sure that breakfast wouldn’t come right back up.
He nodded.
“I gave Robin the address so she’ll be stopping by after she gets off work,” Eddie continued. “I recommend that you get so actual rest, she seems like she’s a lot without her worrying about you, I can only imagine what she’s like when she is.”
Steve blushed.
“We’re going to all stay here,” Gareth said. “At least for one more day. I talked to my mom about it and she would rather pay more for utilities this month then worry about Steve getting worse.”
The other boys nodded their agreement, while Steve blinked at him in confusion.
“What now?”
“You do realize I live in Loch Nora, right?” Gareth asked, raising an eyebrow.
Steve shook his head. “My parents were very much exclusionists, dude. I only got to hang out with people that they deemed acceptable. Nicole, Carol, Tommy H. If they thought they weren’t in the right trade or held more liberal views, they weren’t worthy to interact with their son.”
Gareth blinked. “Fuck, that must have been lonely.”
He ducked his head and half shrugged.
“Anyway,” Gareth continued into the now deafening silence. “They pay for this apartment in the city for when we play gigs or need a place to crash after a night of drinking.”
Steve frowned. “You’re not eighteen yet, though, right?”
“No,” Gareth said with a laugh. “But my parents trust these guys to keep me safe.”
Steve thought about Dustin and his mom. That despite all the things that Steve had gotten up to in his high school career that she still trusted him to take care of her baby.
“Yeah,” he said fondly. “I can see that.”
Eddie came over to the other side of the counter. “Come on, up you get. You’ll be sleeping in my room.”
Steve’s eyes widened. “How many rooms does this place have?”
“Three,” Jeff said. “Brian shares with Gareth, but Eddie and I get our own rooms.”
“That’s because you’re both sluts,” Brian said rolling his eyes, “and me and Gareth don’t want to be kicked out of our rooms when you bring someone home.”
Steve laughed. “Yeah, okay. That’s fair.”
“I’ll give you the tour when I steer you back to my room,” Eddie promised.
Steve nodded and allowed himself to be lead back through the apartment and back to the bedroom.
Eddie tucked him back in and put a garbage can next to the bed. “I’ll be out in the front room, holler if you need me.”
Steve nodded and let himself drift off to sleep.
***
Part 4 Part 5 Part 6
Yeah, I'm sorry, I doubt even a middle class family would buy their very young son (if we hold to the belief that Gareth is OG drummer and was in the talent show with Eddie and Chrissy, putting Eddie in 8th grade, Chrissy in 6th, that would make Gareth in 5th grade) a drum kit.
Tag List: @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @zerokrox-blog @artiststarme @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 ​@a-little-unsteddie @chaosgremlinmunson @chaoticlovingdreamer @maya-custodios-dionach @goodolefashionedloverboi @messrs-weasley @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @danili666 @carlyv @rozzieroos @wonderland-girl143-blog @justforthedead89 @emly03 @bookworm0690 @itsall-taken @vecnuthy @bookbinderbitch @redfreckledwolf @littlewildflowerkitten @yikes-a-bee @awkwardgravity1 @scheodingers-muppet @mira-jadeamethyst @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @genderless-spoon @anne-bennett-cosplayer @irregular-child @lololol-1234 @r0binscript @monsterloverforhire @mugloversonly @live-the-fangirl-life @f0xxyb0xxes @lublix @breealtair @croatoan-like-its-hot @confuseddisastertm @dissociatingdemon @sleepdeprivedflower @thedragonsaunt @jamieweasley13 @hellfireone @dragonmama76
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lilbitdepressed27 · 8 months
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Tara Carpenter/Fem!Reader
Summary: AU no ghostface, takes place when they're in college
Warnings: none really
WC: 5.7k
Authors Note: don't really know where I was going with this one but I hope y'all enjoy :) sorry for any mistakes. Also kinda added some parts from one of my favorite shows :D
Everyone had been intimidated when they first saw you. You had transferred a few days late in the semester. Only by three days. When you had walked into the film study major class. The moment you stepped into the class you heard how quiet it got. You didn't want to take this class but it was either this class or a literature class. Your dad had wanted one class to be of his choice. You hated it but then again he was helping you pay for college.
You stood at 6'2 an athletic built from all your high school years playing basketball. Your dad had wanted you to continue playing but you had different plans. It was one of the reasons why he was so mad that he put you in a the film class. In a way to punish you.
But he wouldn't understand. After what happened, you couldn't go back to basketball. It was the main reason why, what happened to you last year happened.
Everyone looked your way but you kept a blank face. Giving a nod when professor motioned you to sit down. You felt the eyes on the back of your head but ignored everyone while you took your laptop out to take notes.
Ignoring the whispers that you heard.
*
You kept to yourself. At a very young age you've always been tall and a lot of people found that intimidating. It was even worse now that you had muscle. Anyone was too intimidated to come up to you. Until some guy sat down across from you. Though you did not want to be bothered but you were sitting at a table in the quad. You were able to get a table to yourself. The quad wasn't as crowded as you thought it'd be but there were still a few people around. Some empty tables. Which is why you didn't understand why this frat boy sat in front of you.
"Never seen you around sweetheart. Your freakishly tall but I can dig that. The name is Frankie. How about I show you around, could show you the Frankie train after if you want as well." He smirked at you, his overly inflated ego was what irked you.
"Oh you're mute? That's cool. Can't really say no then can you?" You looked at him with your face blank, but memories of what happened last year flashed though your mind. He reached forward but you gripped his and twisted it, your other hand reaching forward and slamming his head on the table extra hard for what he said. He yelped like a little bitch getting the attention of the people in the quad.
"One wrong move and I'll break your fucking hand. I'll give you one chance to walk away and leave me the fuck alone."
"Okay okay I'm sorry. Please let me go." He cried, his nose was bleeding from the slam and you felt satisfied at that. You pushed him away and let him go. He had fallen off his seat, he scrambled to his feet his face red with rage and embarrassment when he noticed everyone watching and some were laughing.
"You crazy fucking bitch."
You kept your straight face, he all but ran away and you continued with your work acting like nothing had happened. You kept on doing your work until it was time for your next class. After packing your things and heading to your class you saw a group sitting at a table looking your way. You spared them a glance your eyes connecting with chocolate brown eyes. She was beautiful. The most gorgeous girl you've ever seen. But you kept on walking.
*
After a long day of classes and your part time job you headed home. You had refused to share a dorm room with a stranger. So getting a apartment was the next thing you could do. The apartment was a solo room with a bathroom and good sized kitchen and living room. It was a great apartment and you loved it.
You walked into the building too see a man and woman kissing. But they quickly pulled away when you walked in. The man looked your way and gave you a slight nod. You returned the nod, the woman was pretty you can't deny. She looked up at you as you grew closer. Quickly making your way up the stairs towards your apartment.
"Hey you're the new chick." You looked up from your keys to see a pretty light skin girl with short hair. "Just wanted to say that you did every girl a favor today. The amount of times that asshole has tried something on every girl. It's insane. I'm Mindy by the way."
"Y-"
"Mindy hurry up I-Oh hi."
The same girl from earlier opened the door to see you. The beautiful brunette from earlier stood there. She was more beautiful up close. You took note of her freckles.
"Hi." You smiled slightly at the shorter girl. Your smile growing just a bit when you saw the blush. The brunette smiled at you, her blush still noticeable but she still seemed so confident.
"I'm Tara." Tara stepped forward of a smirking Mindy, holding out her hand for you to shake. Tara ignored her friend who been busy looking between the taller girl and herself.
"Y/n. Nice to meet you."
Tara just about melted to the floor when your hand engulfed her own. You were so tall. The way your eyes glimmered in the light was enough to hypnotize her. She looked up at you, liking the feeling of how you were looking at her. It made her feel warm inside. The sound of your name was so beautiful. You were so attractive. So handsome.
At the sound of clearing of the throat. You both jumped at the sound. Forgetting that Mindy was standing only a few feet away. You pulled away from Tara, you didn't want to but you also didn't want to seem like a creep.
"Well it was nice meeting you. But I have to start on my homework." You spoke, Tara mentally cooing at the sight of how red the tip of your ears got. The sight of the girl front of her now was a complete 180 from the girl she saw in the quad.
"Oh okay. It was nice to meet you as well." She spoke her eyes never leaving yours. It was like she hypnotized, she didn't want to move. She wanted to stay in your presence.
*
Tara looked at you from a distance. It had been a week since she met you. She had barely seen you around campus, the class she did have with you, you would always be the last one to show up (literally only seconds before the lecture started) and then you'd be the first one to leave the room. It was starting to get a little annoying.
Your once cold expression was back on your face. The gentle smile you showed her that day still plagued her mind. She watched how you ignored everyone especially the other jocks who have been on your ass for what you did to their running back. You didn't even look their way. This time she had sat in the chair where you regularly sit. Mindy sitting right beside her.
Her back straighten when she saw you walk in. With only seconds to spare. She watched as your eyes looked at her direction. Her heart hammering in her chest at seeing a little smile on your lips form. You walked to your chair and sat down right next to her. The chairs were so close to one another, that she got whiff of your perfume. You smelt so good. You looked so good. Your clothes fit you loosely. You had that baggy clothes aesthetic. The style fit you perfectly.
"Stop or you'll start drooling."
Tara felt her cheeks heat up bit as she nudged Mindy away from her.
"Hey."
The sound of your voice coming out in hushed whisper, seeing as the professor had already started his lecture. She couldn't help the smile that made it's way on her face. "Hi."
The class continued on and Tara spent most of her time sneaking glances towards you. Now that she was up close to you, she could take in your face features up close. Your eyes were a soft y/ec, she could also notice some light scars on your face. Now she wondered where you got them. Since she met you, you always wore clothes that covered your body. Long sleeves, sweaters, jackets. She couldn't help but to wonder why.
"You know you won't learn anything if you don't pay attention."
At the sound of your teasing voice her eyes widen a bit and she snapped her head back toward the professor. Her cheeks flaming red at the sound of your soft laugh and Mindy's laugh.
"Shut up. I was multitasking." She huffed, she had been caught ogling at you, feeling all of sudden hot and embarrassed.
*
This time after class you had packed your things slowly. Tara had done the same, Mindy had left right after to meet Anika. "So what class do you have next?" You asked as you stood up.
"I actually have some free time right now, what about you?" She hopped you also had some free time, cause she really wanted to be around you. She knew Sam wouldn't want her to be around someone she barely knows, alone. But there was just something about you that drew her in. Plus ghostface was gone. He had to be. Right?
"So do I. I go to the café not far from here to get something to eat while I study. You wanna come with?" You spoke in tome you hoped that didn't come off too hopeful. Your mom had told you not to trust people, you being too trustworthy was the reason you had almost died the year before. But there was just something about Tara that made you feel like you could trust her. The chances of the same thing happening to you again, was just low. Slim to zero. Right?
*
That's how your days were spent  after your first few classes. They were spent with Tara and sometimes Mindy with her girlfriend Anika. You had met Chad who was Mindy's twin. Along with Quinn and Ethan who were also siblings. Meeting so many people at the same time had made you a little anxious but you tried not to show it.
But Tara had noticed. The way you'd sit at the corner of the booth. Your eyes never looking away from your drink for a long periods of time. Your drink always staying close your body. Or how you'd always keep your answers short. Tara was starting to think you didn't like being around people. It would explain why you always had that 'don't talk to me' look you'd always have.
Although you seemed to relax more when Tara would keep being around you. Tara couldn't explain why she wanted to be around you. But she did and she liked your company. The way you'd relax around her joke and laugh around her. It was something she looked forward to every day.
Four months into the friendship you had with Tara,she had told you what happened to her last year. You couldn't believe she went through that, her own best friend doing that to her. Now you understood why her sister was so protective of Tara. You couldn't blame Sam. Sam had been the girl you saw kissing that guy, that one day. She had recognized you as well but you had kept your mouth shut seeing as she was keeping her relationship a secret. She had been stand-offish towards you as well but you understood. Really you did. You had been the same with everyone else as well. You may be tall but that hadn't stopped anyone before.
You had wanted to tell Tara what happened to you as well but something had stopped you. It wasn't cause you didn't trust. You just felt like it wasn't the right time. She had just told you her trauma, she had cried while she told you. It didn't feel right to tell her yours. So you didn't.
Now you understood why people around campus always looked at Tara and her friends. You never really paid attention to any of them. The scar Tara had on her hand, you didn't question it either. Or the little limp Tara had as well. Sometimes you couldn't really tell she had a limp. It wasn't until you took her to a carnival. With doing a lot of walking, you were able to tell. Without really pointing it out, you had offered a piggy back ride. She laughed and agreed. You saw the small look of relief in her eyes. So you had spent quite a while with her on your back. You had been grateful you picked back up on your gym routine.
You really didn't know who she or her friends were. You never did like the Stab movies and not to mention you had your problems last year.
Now any time you planned something that included walking you made sure to take breaks. You didn't want Tara hurting herself. Now that you knew what had happened to her. You also tried your best to make sure she felt safe.
You were in your apartment now, you had just gotten back from work and had headed straight to take a shower. Tara had texted earlier that she'd be stopping by to take you to her apartment for movie night. You recently given her your spare key. So she'd let herself in.
It wasn't long till Tara had let herself in your apartment. You had been taking too long, everyone was just waiting for you now. She walked further into the apartment. Freezing in her steps when she saw that bathroom door was opened. Your back was to her, she could see your back muscles but what really drew her attention was the light scars on your back. But what really made her stop in her tracks was the tattoo you had your ribcage. It was right under your boob.
DOD92822
She looked at the date, remembering the day like it had been yesterday. It had been the day she had been attacked by ghos-Amber. It had been the day she had thought she was going to die. Why did you have the date tattooed on your body.
"Shit Tara you scared me. I'm almost ready." You had your long sleeve shirt on now, along with some loose shorts. You hadn't noticed how Tara was yet move or say anything as threw your hair up in a messy bun. Finishing your routine and heading out of the bathroom. You only stopped when you noticed the look on Tara's face.
"Hey you okay?" You looked at Tara, growing a bit concern when she didn't say anything. "Tar?"
"What's-What's that?"
You looked at her confused, you looked around to see what she could possibly mean. She walked towards you, placing her hand over your tattoo causing you to straighten up. Breaking your gaze from her to step back. You shuffled on your feet, you weren't sure how to say it.
"Y/n?"
"Have you ever heard of someone named Rosalind Dyer?" You spoke not looking at her just yet. It would be the first time you ever told anyone. You weren't sure if you'd be able to keep your eyes dry if you looked into Tara's eyes.
"The name sounds familiar." Tara didn't know where she heard that name from.
"She's a famous female serial killer. Well turns out she had an apprentice." You moved to sit on the chair. Tara moving to sit in front of you. Now she knew where she heard of that name. She had only been freshman when they had found the first victims of Rosalind Dyer.
"He had kidnapped a few girls and gave them tattoos, before he'd put them in barrels. He had succeeded in doing it to three girls. I had been out with friends at the time. You know we had just won our state championship, we had fake I.Ds. So we went to a bar. There I met Caleb. He had been so nice. Kept on telling me he was a scout ucla and I had believed him. He had so much proof that he was. While I was talking to him about basketball. He slipped something in my drink and the next thing I knew I was strapped on a bed while he gave me the tattoo. The tattoo represented the day of death. I was being put in the barrel, he didn't like how much I was fighting him. He had punched, kicked, sliced his knife at me to force me in. It was a miracle the cops showed up when they did." You finished you'd have felt so grateful for those two cops that saved you that day.
"Uh I still need to save enough money to have the tattoo removed." You mumbled, your eyes still refused to look at Tara.
"The day I told you about what happened to me. Why didn't you say anything. You let me cry on your shoulder. I could have comforted you as well." Tara hadn't heard of what happened down in L.A. She had been too busy focusing on what was going in on Woodsboro. Not knowing that you also were also close to death last year. Not only did you have scars from the day like she did. But you had been branded as well by the psycho killer. Branded by the worst thing that had ever happened to you.
"I didn't think it was the right time Tara. That day was about you."
Tara's heart broke at the sight of tears filling your eyes. It had been the first time you were really vulnerable in front of her. Everything you did now made sense. How you didn't drink if you were out in public, how you always went for bottled water in parties or sometimes not even drink anything. Or how you'd hold her drinks, one hand always covering the top. Or how she'd drunkly try to grab any cups of beer she could get. You'd always stop her. Remembering the small glimpse of fear in your eyes.
She reached for your hands. Taking them in hers.
"Hey. I'm here for you to. Always Y/n. You're stuck with me." She stood up, standing in between your legs as she wrapped her arms around your shoulder and pulled you in. She felt your arms wrapping around her waist. It was no time for her to let the butterflies in her stomach to go crazy.  She wanted to show you the same comfort you showed her when she told you about Ghostface.
She wanted to be the one you felt safe around. Just like she felt safe around you. She felt you relax in her hold. She wanted to make sure you'd never feel like you couldn't tell her something.
*
"I'm assuming she told you."
Tara had stayed with you that night. She had held you like you held her that night she told you. You had fallen asleep on her chest and she couldn't help it but pull you closer. The following morning you had to go to your job and she said she had to go back to the apartment. So with a final hug, you both promised to see each other later.
At the sound of hearing her sisters voice as soon as she walked into her apartment had her jumping a few inches. "Jesus Sam. What the-Wait what do you mean told me? Told me what?"
Sam looked unsure now. If you didn't tell her about what happened, she'd be outing your own trauma and she didn't want to do that. She knew two of your secrets. The one had you pulling your drinks close to you and the one that had you blushing when ever she caught you staring too long at Tara.
"Never mind."
"No does it have to do with her living in L.A?" Tara was now confused cause if it does have what to do with that. How the hell did Sam know.
"Oh she did. Well come on Tara, of course I know. I had to know if she could be trusted. All I had to do was search up her name and a lot of articles from Los Angeles had her name in them." Sam had read a lot of articles and she was had gotten too much information. It was enough for her to feel horrible for reading so much about you. The picture they had of before you had gone missing, you had been so innocent looking. But then they showed one of how you looked after you were rescued. It really was heart wrenching.
"Why didn't you tell me?"
"Are you kidding. It wasn't my secret to tell. Although it wasn't really a secret, I'm sure she had her reasons. Just like we do. We have our own reasons why we don't go around telling people we survived Ghostface attacks." Sam trying to come to her own defense.
"Yea I know. I just want to be there for her. Like how she was there for me." Tara sat on a chair next to the table. Sam sighed and sat in front of her.
"Just keep doing what your doing Tara. I can tell she trusts you. And her  trust is not misplaced. I'm positive yours isn't either. You both have been through something traumatic. Just be patient." Sam reached over and took her sister's hands in hers.
"I really like her Sam." Tara said her eyes filling with tears. Her emotions were all over the place. That fear she felt, the thought of never getting chance to meet you.
"Hey, she likes you to dumbass." At the sight of the bewildered look she got in return made her laugh.
"Really?"
"Geez you really are dumb. Have you not seen the girl. Cold towards literally everyone else but with you, huge softie. A girl literally flirted with her, talking about how cold she was and how she would love someone's jacket. The second you said you were cold, which I know you said it on purpose. She hands you her jacket." Sam rolled her eyes at the sight of Tara's sheepish blush.
"Trust me Tara she feels the same way."
*
Since you've told tara the truth she's been mostly the same. Just like how you became a little bit more protective of her after she told you about ghostface. She had also grown to be just bit mor as protective of you. Tara had always been affectionate but now she was holding your hand in public, hugging you, holding you. Her physical touch had your heart racing. You love Tara. You were sure, no you were positive that you are in love with her. You just didn't want your feelings to ruin what you hav with Tara.
You were sat in the corner of the library with Tara. You both had some free time, so in the mean time you both were goofing off. Holding laughs that made it even funnier when you would look at each other. You couldn't help to laugh as Tara turned red from trying to hold in her laughter. You needed to calm her down before she had an asthma attack. You could her wheeze as she laughed. You pulled out the spare inhaler you carried with you. You had Tara give you one, since you had a scare at the start of the friendship when she had an asthma attack didn't know what was happening until she took out her inhaler.
"Stop." You held back your laugh as you held out the inhaler for her to take.
Tara took the inhaler and used to it. Once she caught her breath she wiped the tears. She still had her giggles and she had been leaning on you from laughing so hard.
You felt your heart beat pick up just a bit when she leaned back into you. Her head resting on your shoulder. It had been a bit cold in the library while you both had started working on your assignments. So you had given her your hoodie for her to wear. You had your long sleeves underneath, you had seen the goosebumps on Tara's arms and you didn't want her to get cold. She had taken the hoodie with some eagerness and put it on. You smiled at the sight of your hoodie engulfing her in your clothing. Your hoodie was really big on her.
Tara had not been cold. She had gotten the goosebumps from how close you were. She had wanted to lean into your warm embrace. You had thought she was cold. And now she was surrounded by your scent. She had pulled the hoodie close to her body. You were totally not getting the hoodie back. It was so warm, so soft and just so you.
"So I've bee-There you two are. I've been looking everywhere. Don't make any planes for later. We've been invited to a party and we're all going." Mindy interrupted you. You deflated a bit knowing very well that Tara would want to go to the party. Even though Sam didn't like when she'd go out. You didn't either but you'd go to make sure Tara and her friends were safe.
It wasn't long till they were all in your apartment getting ready. It was a Halloween party, Tara had dressed up as a pirate and she had you dressing up as one as well. Although you were dressed more like Will Turner from Pirates of the Caribbean. You didn't want to but you agreed never the less when it came to
Tara.
"Oh you guys look so cute." Anika gushed from her seat as Tara fixed your hat. You blushed when Tara smirked your way, her eyes twinkling in the lights from your apartment.
"Nika take a picture of us." Tara handed her phone to Anika. She then moved back to you pulling your close. Her arms wrapped around your waist as your loved to around her shoulders pulling her closer.
Anika took the pictures and more. Smirking when she caught the moment when you looked down at Tara and Tara had looked back up at you. The moment being captured by Anika and she couldn't feel any more proud of herself.
The walk towards the party was pretty light. Tara stayed by your side, her fingers interlocked with yours. You stood tall next to her, just cause she had seen your softer side, didn't everyone else got to.
The party had already been in full swing by the time they arrived. You watched as tara served herself a drink and grabbed a bottled water for you. You tried to relax but you never really liked going to parties. You had told Tara you had to go to the bathroom. She nodded standing up to follow you. You sat her down with a hand on the shoulder.
"I'll be fine. Stay with Mindy I won't be long."
Even though tipsy, she hesitated to let you leave by yourself. She hated how over bearing Sam had become and she didn't want you to feel like that. She stayed in her seat watching you leave. She knew the line for the down stairs bathroom was long. So maybe you'd go upstairs. And you did. So you wouldn't last too long. She watched as you disappeared upstairs. She counted down the minutes, standing up to wait for you by the stairs. As she made her to the stairs, she was stopped.
"You're looking quite sexy Tara. Wanna go upstairs so I can show you my hook."
Tara groaned in annoyance. She had just about enough of the guy standing in front of her. He had tried so hard to get her attention the moment they moved to New York. She had done everything to avoid him. And he would stay when you were around. He wouldn't out right say it but was afraid of you. But there were times when she'd be alone and he'd try to talk her up.
"Leave me alone Frankie."
She moved to go around him but was stopped by his hand grabbing her wrist. He tried to lead her up stairs and she had been a little more tipsy than she had thought. Her balance was off and had fallen if the douche bag wasn't holding her.
"Hey man, Tara's good down here." Chad had reached for Tara's wrist but Frankie had pulled her away.
"Sorry bro I didn't catch that." Frankie took a step down he smug attitude in place.
You had been turning to walk down the steps, the bathroom upstairs also a line but wasn't as long as the one downstairs. You stopped right behind the guy that you had slammed his face on the table. You couldn't be bothered to remember his name.
"Yea you did. Now let her go." With being step or two above him you stood extremely over him. Your eyes went down to the wrist that the douche bag had a hold of. You saw the shift of his attitude the way he clenched his dad. The hold he tara tightening. The wince coming from tara was enough for your to react.
Making the finals steps to him as you moved stand between Tara and the frat boy. Your hand gripping the hand that held Tara's. "I said let her go."
With a mocking laugh he let go, you also let him go. You didn't think he'd do something else. But you were proven wrong, before you could even blink his left fist connected with your cheek. The force of the punch had caused you to lose your balance and fall down a few steps before Chad caught you.
"You fucking asshole."
You had heard Tara curse the guy out. But then it was followed by a loud groan and another person tumbling down the steps. Chad had moved you both out of the way of falling frat boy. Everyone in the party laughed at the boy as clutched on to his balls.
"Oh my god are you okay. Let me see." Tara had sobered up pretty quickly when you been punched. She had felt this, anger in her. She had never felt like this. But actually seeing you get hurt right in front of her had her seeing red. She moved with a purpose, to cause any type of pain towards Frankie. And that's what she did she made sure to use the tip of her heels. The satisfaction of seeing him cry in pain as he fell to the floor.
Seeing you standing there in shock and a hint of amusement in your eyes had her snapping her attention back to you. Cupping your cheeks to see the damage done on your pretty face. With the lights house being shitty she took your hand on hers, picking up your fallen pirate hat.
Once out side under a street light she stopped taking in your slightly red cheek bone.
"Ugh that asshole. I'm going to-Hey I'm okay. Are you okay? You were dragged upstairs. I should of have been there with you." You stopped her from talking. Feeling a little guilty for not stopping that douche bag.
"Hey it's not your fault. Frankie is douche and a total creep." Tara gently rubbed her thump over the redness of your cheek bone.
You couldn't help the smile and them a small laugh. "Man. His face was too funny when you went full on Messi on his balls." At the sight of Tara's proud smile you let out a full on laugh. Wrapping an arm around her shoulder.
"Man Tara that was awesome."
"Thank you thank you." She stated in a confident voice standing straight while wrapping her arm wound your waist. She had laughed as well, she was thankful that nothing today had brought any bad memories your way.
Her smile faltered a bit when she noticed how close both of your faces were. She had seen the moment you realized the closeness as well. Her skipping a beat at the sight of your eyes looking into her and then down to her lips. She moved a little closer, hoping she had read the signs right. She really hoped she did. Seeing you look back into her eyes with only inches keeping her lips off yours. The look in your eyes was enough for her to make the final move.
The moment her lips touched yours, was enough for her to die of happiness. Your lips had been as soft as they looked. The way you cupped her cheeks, she gripped your shirt in her fists pulling you as close as she could. She faintly taste your cheery chapstick and didn't know she could love cherry so much. Loving the way you held her. The way your lips moved against hers. The way your lips had dominated hers without even trying.
She smiled into the kiss, causing you to smile in return pulling away from the kiss.
"Wait you're not drunk are you. Oh my god I just too-Shut up. I'm not drunk and you have no idea how long I've been wanting to do that." She smiled up at you. Her dimples on full display when you smiled back down at her.
From a distance Tara’s friends stood with happy smiles on their faces. It was about damn time that the two of you got together.
The two of you deserved each other.
:)
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ahgasegotarmy116 · 4 months
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He Doesn't Deserve You | A Jeon Jungkook Series | Chapter One
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Summary: Life didn't turn out the way you wanted. You got the guy, and the job but everything else you had ever wanted has been crumbling around you. Pairing: f!reader x Jeon Jungkook Word Count: 2.1k~ Warnings: yändere, manipulation, domestic violence, self harm, cheating, explicit language, hints at smut, angst, idk what else lol a/n: Ahh thank you so much for all of the love so far on the intro and even all the notes on the masterlist hehe. I'm really loving the direction this story is going in so I hope you guys will too! And thanks again to @kkusadmirer for the request!
Opening my laptop I pull up the most recent edit I had done on the next chapter I was working on. 
I'm a writer, not an incredibly famous one but a writer nonetheless. I make enough to get by and I'm able to work from home so that's all I ever really wanted. Just a silly girl, writing her silly stories, living her silly life. 
But unfortunately things don't always turn out the way you want them to. 
I thought I had it all, perfect grades and a perfect boyfriend with a loving family and a bright bright future. Now looking back at it all and seeing all of the stuff in the background that I somehow missed just makes me feel foolish.
How could I not notice Taehyung wondering eye? Why did I not listen to what my friends used to say about him? Why did I leave all of my friends behind for him? 
Being so wrapped up and so in love with him I didn't even notice the fact that my family was falling apart. My mom cheated on my dad and I never knew until they told me they were getting a divorce.
While my brother was struggling in high school while being around all of their screaming and fighting and finally got committed to a mental institution when he had a psychotic break.
I never knew anything about that. It's not like I didn't care, but I just never really reached out or gave them enough time to reach out to me. 
I was always like 'Oh Tae just got home I have to go' or 'Tae is expecting me so I need to get going'. My world has revolved around him for so long that my family and friends feel like strangers. 
How could I have been so stupid and neglected them, all for one guy?
The one that I wanted to build a future with and promised to do the same with me. Now here I am, 24 with student loans up to my neck and a sorry excuse for a marriage with a husband that is never home. 
I don't know what I managed to do in my past life that ended up royally fucking me up in this one but I'm sorry. Why couldn't I have done better so I would be saved from having my spirit broken and my heart ripped to shreds. 
The only positive thing is that this has given me is the inspiration to come up with an even more fucked up series of books that has been my only source of income for the past few years. 
Years, wow. 
Thinking about how much time has passed and how things went to shit so quickly helped me continue down this downward spiral and I don't know how to make it stop. Although the sound of keys jingling outside the front door is my rude awakening, my brain knowing I need to be conscious of what may happen next.
 I quickly wipe off the tears that I didn't even realized had started to fall and clear my throat. Moments later I'm met with the sight of Taehyung walking in wearing the same shirt I had seen him in yesterday but sports a brand new hickey near the collar, just barely noticeable but he makes no effort to hide it. 
"Y/n" I hear him call out, breaking me out of my train of thought. "Yes?" I question, hating that I've been caught off guard even though I was staring right at him. "I asked if we have anything to eat" he says, making his way over to the refrigerator, now going to see if he can answer his own question before I'm even given another second to speak up. 
"Um yeah I think there's some left over pizza from last night" I say and get up to walk towards him. "So how was work yesterday?" I ask tentatively, still not sure what kind of mood he's in. "Exhausting but it is what it is I guess" he says while stuffing his face full of a cold slice of pepperoni pizza. 
I turn to walk away while nodding my head, not bothering to ask anything else since it seems from his vague answers that he's not in the mood to talk. 
"Hey" he says, gently grabbing my wrist with the hand that wasn't occupied with the pizza, leaving me frozen in place. I know better than to walk away from him. Even if he's not mad at the moment doesn't mean that he won't be in the next. 
"Where are you running off to?" he asks pulling me close by that same wrist. Still doing so carefully but pressing on the bruises that he had left there from the last fight we had. 
He sees my slight look of discomfort and how my vision is trained on the wrist he's still holding and rolls up my sleeve, taking a quick look and seeing the evidence of his past transgressions.
"It left a mark huh?" he says examining the spot further and then bringing it up to his face where he places a few featherlight kisses on it, making a flash of heat run through my system when he looks back up at me with those eyes.
Those bedroom eyes that never fail to put me in a trance. He lifts his hand up towards my face and I flinch not knowing what to expect and see him stopping for a second, surprised by my reaction.
"Don't be afraid baby, it's just me" he says and keeps going, hooking his finger on the collar of my turtleneck to pull it to the side, no doubt searching for other marks. 
"There's marks here too. I guess it's a good thing you stay home. Don't want to have to make up excuses for those now would you?" he says tapping under my chin twice, a slight lilt in his tone, enjoying my clear discomfort in showing them to someone, even if it's the person that's caused them.
"What did you do today baby?" he asks, letting go of me and going back to grab a few other things out of the fridge to complete his meal. "Oh you know, just some writing" I say, trailing off and giving him the same answer that I've given him time and time again. 
"You almost done with it?" he questions, only really asking so he knows when my next big payday will be. 
I shake my head "No, not yet. I think I'm only about halfway though" I say, giving simple answers to his simple questions. "Well you better get it out soon. I bet your readers are dying to know what happens next" he says giving me a quick wink before taking everything he has in his hands and carrying it over to the couch. 
"Do you think you could grab me a beer?" he asks, but I know it's more of a courtesy than anything phrasing it like I actually had an option. I respond with a quiet yeah and bring it over to him, placing it on the coffee table. 
"Thanks babe" he says and grabs a ahold of my hand and angles his head up, clearly asking for a kiss to which I oblige. Again something I don't really have an option in doing. "I missed you" he says and rubs his nose against mine cutely, or at least it used to be cute. Now it just makes me sad thinking of all of those times when we were happy.
"Are you gonna watch the game with me?" this time giving me something that I actually have a choice in. "I think I've got some more writing I'd like to do" I say and he nods his head not even bothering to look at me or give me a verbal sign of acknowledgment before turning on said game and slumping back into the couch to watch. 
I walk over to my desk that happens to unfortunately be in the living room so I'm forced to grab my headphones to drown out the sound so I can hopefully get another chapter or two in before I call it a night. 
~~~~~~
"Baby" I hear him call for me through my headphones after some time, that's something that I've had to fine tune. Making sure I can hear him when he talks to me no matter what so it's one less thing I have to worry about him getting upset about. 
I pull out my headphones and turn my attention towards him, half expecting him to ask me to get him a beer. "Yes?" I reply, waiting to see what he needs. "Come here" he says holding his hand out to me and spreading his legs, showing me where he wants me. 
I get up and walk towards him, straddling him once I get close enough and putting my arms around his neck. "Hi" he says in a deep voice sending a shockwave through my nervous system. "Hi" I respond quietly, intimidated at the thought of what he might do next. "How was the game?" I ask tentatively, hoping for my own sake that there was a favorable result. 
"We won" he says, mindlessly tracing his hands up and down my curves. "How's your book?" he asks leaning into my neck, placing kisses over the bruises he had noticed from before. "
It's going" I whisper, starting to feel breathless from his warm breath fanning the sensitive parts of my skin. "Ready for a break?" he asks, question laced with a mischievous tone. I hum in acknowledgment, tilting my head to the side so he can have his fun.
~~~~~~
"I'm gonna head out but I'll be back later" Taehyung says while getting dressed with me still laying there with only a sheet to cover my body. "You're leaving?" I question, knowing he just said that but hoping he'll give me some sort of explanation.
"The guys wanted to meet up for a couple of drinks to talk about the game. Get some rest okay? I'll be back in a few hours" he says planting a soft kiss on my lips and one on my forehead. 
I nod as he pulls the comforter over me as well, starting to already to drift off to sleep. "Stay safe" I mumble and flip over to the other side to try and get more comfortable.
He looks down at me for a second and chuckles at my fucked out and sleepy state before walking out of our bedroom and soon I'm left with the sound of him closing and locking the door behind him. 
Although this night was bittersweet I'm thankful that it ended up like this. He's not a selfish lover when it comes to sex so I'm always left sleepy and satisfied except for the times that he's more rough, rough is putting it lightly so I guess I should say when he's more violent. 
I hate thinking about those nights and I refuse to let those dark thoughts cloud this physical euphoric feeling I have but I can't help but worry about what he might actually be going out to do.
 Would having a drink with the guys really make him want to leave his naked and freshly fucked wife alone in his bed? I just don't get it. If he's already been with me tonight could there be a possibility that he would wake up in another woman's bed and leave me waking up alone again tomorrow?
There's no use worrying about it though. It's not like it hasn't happened before, but why do I always let it get to me? Yes he's my husband but our marriage isn't like other ones in anyway shape or form. I'm here when he wants or needs me and that's it. I'm not allowed to want or need him because I'm just left disappointed every single time.
He doesn't love me, he just loves what I can give him and I need to come to terms with that. But it's nights like these where he's gentle and whispers sweet nothings in my ear that make me second guess things. 
Maybe he's changed? Maybe he's realized what actually matters? And maybe I'm just getting my hopes up. I can't keep lying to myself but I don't know what else to do. I feel alone most days but these little glimmers of hope are what keep me holding on and unfortunately that's all I have left. 
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eroslove88 · 1 year
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"She only wanted to lie beside him"
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Pairing: Yan. Kenma x Fem. Reader
Warnings: Stalking, kidnapping, bondage, noncon touching and noncon implied
Note: WOAH!!! I POST 2 TIMES IN A WEEK. WILD!!! Uhm yeah, this is a guilty pleasure fic.
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Turning on your computer you feel a bit... dumb? It feels useless to even message him- but yet here you are. Kenma messaged you, and that's not out of the ordinary. Actually it's pretty normal, it's been normal for like 6-7 months.
You got close to him because he was in a server with a mutual friend. He goes to your high school and growing up the most you said to him was something about project years ago. Senior year- you thought that this would be the year where you'd come out of your shell but that never happened. Anxiety crashed that thought early on. When you got on a daily routine of texting Kenma you thought he'd actually want to befriend you, but that's not what happened. Long late night conversations and not a word said to each other in real life. It doesn't help that you two walk the same way home either...
Maybe you wouldn't have cared so much if you didn't have a small crush on him.
'hey did we hv hw' your computer gets a notification, Kenma. You sigh and type back, 'Yeah, the insert for this lesson.' you see that he's typing but he stops and doesn't respond until about 5 minutes later- despite being online. '👍' you couldn't help but roll your eyes and just sigh.
None the less he was an ok dude, he had offered to gift you things, games & chocolates- all of which you declined. You didn't want to feel materialistic and greedy.
'do you wanna play gungeon' you put your jacket on and replied quickly, 'Sorry, I'm going for a walk. I can play in an hour though!' you patiently waited and he replied quickly. 'k' huffing you closed your laptop, charging it before you left.
During the winter, the sun went down faster than usual. So around 7ish the streets were empty for walkers except for the occasional dog walkers.
The sound of quiet foot steps penetrated your mind. Snapping your head around you're faced with empty streets, probably paranoia you thought. You turned your music up walking down your usual route.
Even with the music playing you couldn't help but hear footsteps everywhere. You weren't so far from the park... just 3 more blocks.
The feeling of being watched burns your neck, you really should've turned around. Pounding footsteps come running towards you but you were too late. Your screams were demoted to tiny whimpers as you weakly try grasping the needle in your neck.
You were freezing, your arms and legs were duct taped together. It was a pretty lazy job, but whatever kind of tape it was was pretty fucking strong. Your vision was blurred with tears and you whimper into your gag and curled into yourself seeming to have missed the boy sitting at the desk across the room.
It wasn't until you heard the creaking of the chair and light footsteps that you felt panic. Your eyes remained closed even when he was right by your face.
The bed dipped down, "Don't worry, I won't hurt you" a small crying noise comes out from your gag as you try to beg him to stay away. He shushed you coming closer but all you could do was shake your head and try to move away, "Hey, it's ok" he spoke to you like a stray kitten as he slowly approached your trembling body, "Sh... It's only me" you knew that. But that didn't stop you from squirming in his arm as you tried pushing him away. He tisked at your pitiful attempt, " 'm really sorry for not approaching you" he mumbles kissing your head. "I knew you were lonely..." he chuckles, "But that honestly made things even easier" he let's you go and stands up. "I've been waiting a while to do this you know" he pulls out a black box. He opened it and paused "I've always been curious to see how your pretty face would look with a full pussy" he pulls out 3 big dildos, "and ass" he smirks pulling out a condom. "2 v. 2?"
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writingsbymo-mo · 5 months
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And So, We Meet Again
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Future Timeline!Rindou x Reader
Contains: fluff, mild angst
Note: this has spoilers for the end of the Tenjiku Arc for any anime only's or anyone who hasn't finished reading it yet
Summary
You and Rindou dated back when you were an exchange student. However, that time was far too short, leaving the two of you broken-hearted for years until you finally meet again.
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"I-I'm sorry R-Rindou *sniff* I have to go back home," you cried into his shirt, staining it with tears as you squeezed him tightly, never wanting to let go. "Please don't forget about me...I promise to see you again one day."
Those were the last words you spoke to him before you left to your home country the following day. It broke your heart having to leave him and your friends behind though, you knew it was inevitable you'd have to return home. Rindou knew too, but it never stopped that aching feeling in either of you.
You had each other's emails to communicate back home. For a while, you received some from him until one day, they stopped...the date Tenjiku fought Toman. You weren't sure what happened to him, and it scared you, though you never gave up hope. You would one day hear from him once more.
You never knew he was arrested and beaten.
You never knew what he was doing while you were away.
You never knew when you'd see him again.....
It wasn't until a few years after graduating high school that you were finally going to step foot in Japan. You applied to study abroad for the spring semester, wanting to see the delicate sakura blossoms dancing in the breeze. And maybe, just maybe, you'd see them with Rindou again like old times. Even after all this time, he still held a place in your heart.
When you arrived at the airport, you were met with the familiar smell of the sea. 'I'm finally back!' You thought excitedly. With a skip in your step, you grabbed your things and took a train towards your campus. Despite the jet lag, you were so excited to settle in and hope to see some old faces.
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A couple days later, you finally were settled into your dorm with the help of your roommate. You laid in bed, staring at the ceiling as you stretched your body. Everything was in its place. You sat up and yawned, "I should go out today. Maybe check out the gym on campus?"
You stood up and got dressed, grabbing your things as you waved at your roommate who's currently at their desk already doing some research.
The breeze was cool despite the warm rays from the sun baking the blacktop through campus. It was comfortable enough for you though. When you arrived at the gym, you noticed that you weren't the only one who had the same idea. And by that, most of the equipment was being used. "Damn it," you muttered under your breath, "maybe I should go off campus?" You took out your phone, searching for the nearest gym. It was a bit far. You'd have to take the train just to get close enough for a comfortable walk. You sighed as you slipped it back in your bag. "Well, guess I'll be getting a pre-workout today."
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"I'm gonna beat your ass at bench presses today Rindou!"
"Yeah, if you use those plates, bitch!"
It was just any other day of training for Rindou and Kakuchou or competitive training. It was always a competition. Loser had to pay up based on how many kilos used and how many lifts they did. Kakuchou had been on a winning streak lately. Rindou was determined to win today. They both laid on the flat benches and got started.
"Fucking finally!" Rindou cheered, "Alright, pay up Kakuchou."
Kakuchou shook his head with a smile and handed over the small stack of cash, "Alright, alright, you win this round, but I'm going to win the next!" Power lifts, chin ups, you name it. In the end, they ended with a draw.
After they left the showers and changed, Rindou noticed something or someone familiar to him but he couldn't quite place where he'd seen this person before. Then it hit him. His eyes widened to saucers as his jaw hung open, whispering your name. He couldn't believe it. He rubbed his eyes, almost tempted to take his contacts out to clean them, but didn't want to hassle with that now.
You're here, but how? Why?
Rindou's heart rate picked up. He couldn't even hear Kakuchou failing to gain his attention. He was simply entranced by you. Only you. Always you.
Rindou dated a few times after you left, though they never lasted. It's like he lost a part of himself. Ran noticed, too. He'd attempt to cheer his little brother up, taking him to their favorite clubs, buying new albums from his favorite artists, and even taking him to his favorite restaurants and cafés. Kakucho started hanging out with him at the gym more often, competing with one another; anything from bench presses to dead lifts was on the table. Rindou would recover his spirits, though that hole in his heart remained.
When he saw you before him for the first time in years, the world stood still, all except for you. As radiant as ever.
You hadn't noticed him approaching you, too focused on changing your weights for your next routine when your phone fell on the floor. "Shit...," you groaned.
Just as you crouched down to reach it, a hand holding your phone appeared before you. "Oh, thank you...R-Rindou?!" You gasped, jumping up as you wrapped your arms around him, happily grinning. Of all the possible places in Tokyo to reunite, you didn't expect to run into him at the gym near the college. "I didn't expect to see you so soon! Love your jellyfish cut. Looks good on you."
Rindou's face flushed crimson, stunned as his heart pounded in his chest. "Y-yeah, thanks," his voice cracked as he returned the hug. "How long have you been here?"
"Three days. Decided to do a few reps with some dumbells today. The gym on campus was too crowded...so I came here," you paused and let your arms fall to your side, taking a small step back to take in his features. His jaw was sharper, more defined than when you were teens. His muscles were toned more than before. You thought he was handsome before, but now, he's simply striking. If you weren't blushing before, you certainly were now avoiding his sharp gaze as you rubbed your arm. "I-I'm glad to see you again."
Rindou smiled and nodded.
"Hey Rindou—
"Oh, Kakuchou," his eyes widened as he turned to face him. You were in his mind so much, he almost forgot about his friend he came with.
Kakuchou folded his arms, darting his gaze between the two of you as a small grin appeared on his face. "So....are you ready to go or—
"You go ahead. I'll stay a bit longer," Rindou smiled reassuringly, knowing exactly what was going through his friend's mind. Kakuchou nodded and waved, "ok, see ya later then."
"Bye Kaku-chan! It was nice seeing you again," you waved back. He turned towards the door briskly as a blush crept up his neck at the old nickname you gave him. "Y-yeah."
As Kakuchou left, you grasped Rindou's hand. "Wanna join me, Rin?" His cheeks glowed pink, nodding as you lead the way back to the dumbells, choosing the weight you felt comfortable with. Rindou grabbed a couple of fifteen kilos for himself for a lighter workout.
After a few stretches, you were ready to go. You performed a few curls and squats, mixing them up with the weights in sets. Rindou gave you insight to work more muscle groups through your routine. You really noticed the ones you missed after a couple reps, feeling that tense almost jelly-like sensation. He'd always use his sweet voice, the one he only used around you the whole session. It was almost like you'd never been apart.
Almost an hour later, your body was almost too sore to lift anymore. "Hey Rin, I think I'm done for today. Wanna go again later this week?" Honestly, you weren't ready to end the day with him yet. The way he looked at you, it appears he felt the same. "Sure," he takes his phone out of his pocket, "I'll give you my new number then." You nodded, adding his new info and placing it back in your bag with a giddy look on your face. You could talk to him like before.
With your bag over your shoulder, you began to step to the exit with Rindou in tow. You were about to head your separate ways when he spoke, "are you hungry?" He asks softly and starts nervously rubbing the back of his neck, "there's a café nearby if you'd like to go."
How could you refuse? Your eyes sparkled as you grabbed his hand. "Lead the way Rin!" He grinned softly, returning your grasp.
The wind tunneled through the streets here, sending a chill down your spine. Rindou paused his steps, releasing your hand as you gave him a puzzled look. He took off his jacket and draped it over your shoulders. "Better?" You blinked your eyes at him, then giggled, "as charming as ever. Thank you." You wrapped the jacket closer to you, taking in the scent. He smelled just as you remembered, like sandalwood with musky undertones. His hand gently grasped your shoulder, leading you along beside him. Warmth filled your cheeks as you leaned closer.
You entered the café with his hand still on your shoulder. It was warm and cozy inside with the soft lighting and cushioned chairs. One of the servers approached the two of you. "Table for the lovely couple?"
Your face flushed crimson. You were about to speak but Rindou beat you to it. "Yes, is there one available by the window?" Your server nodded, "why yes, follow me."
He didn't say no...
Why didn't he say no?
Wait....did I miss something? No...that's not it...
Rindou, if you want to get back together just say so.
You sat at the table with the perfect view of the sakura tree that was beginning to bud. The natural lighting brought out Rindou's features. You picked up your menu, trying not to look at him, knowing you'll turn into more of a blushing mess than you were earlier. Still, you had to bring that up. "So....Rin, are we...you know...a thing again?" You darted your eyes between him and the menu, trying not to stutter.
Warmth caressed your hand as he laid his onto yours, "if you want to be, then yes, we are." He smiled tenderly at you, making you melt. "I've missed you so much, sweetheart."
You didn't realize the tears already forming in your eyes when he confessed. "I missed you too, Rin. I thought about you every day...I'd love to be with you again!" He slid his hand under yours, lifting it closer to his face and gave you a chaste kiss. "Then I'm yours."
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The sun was setting by the time you left the café with Rindou, holding hands and leaning into each other like old times. He offered to walk with you to the station, which you happily obliged. It didn't take much for some unanswered questions to appear in your mind.
"Say Rindou, what happened while I was away? Did something happen the day you fought Toman?"
He ran a hand through his hair and sighed, "to start with, I got humiliated being beaten by this crybaby from Toman...then got arrested..."
Your hands slapped over your mouth as you gasped, "Oh my gosh...I'm so sorry Rin..." He grabbed your waist, pulling you against him. "It's in the past now. Sorry I couldn't talk to you for so long..." You shook your head at him as you wrapped your arms around him, "don't be, you've been through so much."
You stood there unmoving for a while, just basking in each other's comfort. "We should get moving or else you'll miss the train." You didn't want to stop, but you knew it was for the best.
When you approached the station, something was off. Police barricaded the entrance with a few cars parked outside, paramedics at the scene, and some guarding the entrance, informing passersby of the situation. A man had apparently entered the station and stabbed two people. Not much else is known but speculations are leading towards the suspect knowing the victims.
"Shit...the next station is a long way from here," you paused to yawn, "and I'm getting sleepy..."
"You can always stay with me and my brother. Our apartment is much closer," he offered. "Oh yes, please! That would be great." Rindou hummed at that, guiding you along once more.
"Oh, one thing I need to mention. Ran will be pissed when he sees you," he sighed with a slight groan. "What?! Is it because I left?" He nodded in response, "I wasn't myself for a long time and he blamed you for it."
"I mean...he has a good reason to be mad at me." You shifted your gaze to the ground, tears glossing over your eyes the more you thought. It never was your intention for Rindou to become depressed with your absence. "I'm so sorry Rin," you cried, squeezing him tightly in your arms, "I'm so sorry...I wish I could've stayed here...then you wouldn't —"
"Shhhh, that's enough. It's alright," he whispered, rubbing circles onto your back and wiping your tears away, "I know I wasn't the only one who felt that way."
You hummed, "yeah...I'm glad he's always been there for you."
"Can't say I enjoyed all his ways to cheer me up..."
You furrowed your brows at him, "and that would be?"
"The bitches he'd always try to hook me up with," he groaned. "Sure, some of them weren't so bad but none lasted more than two weeks...should've just stuck with the clubs."
"He was still trying to be a good brother."
"Yeah...I know. Still, Kakuchou was much better at keeping my mind off you. The competitions and sparring matches were the best...just glad he didn't take me to a yakuza office to fight again...," he shivered at the thought, "never again..."
"Wait...he did did what?!!" Your eyes nearly popped out at how wide they got. "I must've forgot to tell you about that with you leaving soon and all...didn't want to worry you." He rested his head on yours to reassure you. "Mmm, fair point. Still gonna talk to him though."
Rindou paused his steps again as you arrived at the apartment. "Wait here," he whispered, "he should be asleep by now but...just in case." You nodded as he unlocked the door,opening it slowly. All the lights were turned off, save for the light near the bathroom. You heard him sigh in relief. "Ok, be very quiet. If he wakes up, there's no telling what he'll do."
"And what would that be, Rin-Rin?"
You both froze at the voice from behind you. "A-aniki...I—"
Ran breathed a sigh, "I already know. Kakuchou told me everything.
Ran breathed a sigh, "I already know. Kakuchou told me everything." His tired eyes darted to yours. "I swear, if you break his heart again," he leans down to your right ear and whispers, "I'll break you."
A chill ran down your spine. You gulped as your hairs stood on end. "I-I promise I'll be good to him."
"You better."
"Ugh, aniki," Rindou rolled his eyes, "don't scare them. I'll be fine."
Ran tussles Rindou's hair with his signature smirk. "Alright, I won't scare them too much...for now." He steps inside and whips his head back. "You lovebirds coming in or what?"
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Might be a part 2 so stay tuned for more
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nakachuchu · 9 months
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Enjoyment | Gojo Satoru
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SYNOPSIS: You didn't enjoy things in life until meeting Gojo.
READER: female
WORDS: 1.1k
WRITTEN: 07/24/2023
NOTE: Thank you for requesting! Sorry this is more "I don't care" than "I'm ditzy." Feel free to request again for anything!
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You just could not give a fuck. You really could not. You hated responsibility. You hated having to bear the weight of a million mountains, just to die regretful in the end.
The world of Jujutsu was full of drama and hierarchies that would always put you below because of your gender.
No matter how powerful you were, you would never hold the same status as a man. That was a reason that continued to your personality.
People higher-up didn't like to meet with you in person or even talk to you over the phone because you just didn't care.
Your brain was numb and you found no enjoyment in things. No matter how much you slept or how many vitamins you swallowed like drugs, you were always so tired.
You did your job. You did what you were commanded and you would repeat the cycle over and over again.
Most things were deaf to you. Whatever people said, if it wasn't of utmost importance relating to your job as a sorceress, then your ears would fold over.
Maybe you had heard of the name Gojo or Satoru, but never Gojo Satoru, the holder of the Six Eyes. You never heard his full title, so you had no clue who he was until you saw him.
It was cliche to say that his beauty captured your attention. His beauty captured every women's attention, but it was a miracle for your attention span to be held.
You shrugged him off when you saw his sparkling blue eyes and white eyelashes flutter on his date with a woman in a cafe.
You carried on with your day for weeks until you saw him again at the Tokyo Prefectural Jujutsu High School.
As a student from the Kyoto Prefectural Jujutsu High School, you never crossed paths with him. The slight age gap helped that as well. You were five years older than him at the time.
You were at the Tokyo site to have a meeting with Yaga on the subject of Itadori Yuuji. The subject of Gojo Satoru came into the conversation, and all you could respond with was "Who?"
Your question was so dead serious that Yaga couldn't tell if you were pulling his leg or not. When he finally realized you were being serious, he stood up without a word and dragged you over to Gojo before he could leave campus.
"This is Gojo Satoru," said Yaga.
You tilted your head. "I'm L/N Y/N."
"No, he's Gojo Satoru, the Six Eyes holder," Yaga said, exhausted by the limited space in your brain.
You hummed and leaned forward, looking up at Gojo who had an amused smile on his face. "Do you really have six eyes or what? Is that why you wear a blindfold?"
"Actually, I do have six eyes. The sun hurts, you know, if I don't wear my blindfold."
Yaga smacked Gojo — as much as he possibly could due to his infinity being turned on. "Be serious."
"Yeah, yeah," he muttered. "I only have two eyes."
You leaned back. "Boring. I'll be going now. See you whenever, Yaga."
You walked away with a lazy wave, yawning in the process. Gojo watched you walk away, intrigued by your nonchalant attitude and apparent lack of interest in him.
As one of the most powerful sorcerers alive, he was used to people fawning over him or being intimidated by his presence. But you seemed completely unfazed.
Over the next few weeks, Gojo found himself thinking about you more often than he expected. He learned your name was Y/N and that you were a talented jujutsu sorceress from Kyoto, despite your bored disposition. He started finding excuses to be around Kyoto more often, hoping to run into you again.
One day, Gojo "happened" to show up at the Kyoto Jujutsu High School while you were teaching a class. As your students whispered excitedly about the unexpected guest, you raised an eyebrow.
"To what do I owe the pleasure, Gojo-san?" you asked dryly after class.
Gojo grinned. "I was in the neighborhood and thought I'd stop by to see you."
You stared at him. "Is that so? Well, I'm afraid I'm quite busy today." You started to walk away.
Gojo felt challenged by your continued indifference to him. "Let me take you out for tea," he offered.
You paused, contemplating his request.
"Tea's boring," you said pointedly before walking off.
"Coffee?"
"I want ice cream."
"Deal," he said.
"You're buying."
Over ice cream that afternoon, the two of you slowly opened up more to each other. Underneath your bored facade, Gojo was surprised to find a sharp intellect and wry sense of humor.
That day marked the start of an unlikely relationship between you both. Your contrasts balanced each other out in ways neither expected.
Because of Gojo, you began to find enjoyment in certain things. You liked going out for sweets with him, but you liked it even more when he paid for things.
The man was loaded and nothing was stopping you from taking advantage of that old money he had in his pockets.
"I feel a bit hurt you're using me for money," he said as he watched you eat dango.
"You should be honored," you said through a mouthful.
Gojo let out an exaggerated sigh. "I suppose I should be honored that a beauty like yourself wants to spend time with me, even if it is just for my money."
You rolled your eyes as you finished up the last dango stick. "Don't flatter yourself too much. I'm mostly here for the free food."
"But you don't deny you find me handsome," Gojo said with a smirk.
"I never said that."
"You didn't have to. I can tell."
You gave him an irritated look, though amusement shone in your eyes. As much as you hated to admit it, you were starting to enjoy Gojo's company. His confidence bordering on arrogance used to annoy you, but now you found it almost endearing.
After finishing the dango, the two of you took a stroll through the park. The weather was pleasant, with cherry blossoms in full bloom.
You talked about nothing in particular, simply enjoying each other's presence. As the sun began to set, Gojo walked you home. At your door, he paused.
"I had a nice time today," he said.
You nodded. "I guess you can take me out again, as long as you keep paying."
Gojo grinned. "It's a deal."
He started to lean in, then stopped, waiting for permission. You closed the distance between you and pressed a quick kiss to his lips.
When you pulled back, Gojo looked pleased.
"So does this mean I get to call you my girlfriend now?"
"Don't push it," you said.
But you did squeeze his hand before disappearing inside your apartment.
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maybank-archives · 6 months
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jealous - jj maybank
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warning: +18. NSFW CONTENT. MINORS DNI. public sex. fingering. vaginal sex. unprotected sex. language. dirty talking.
word count: 1.4k
author’s notes: that's a wrap, speaking of it, use protection kids :)
masterlist | join the taglist | kinktober masterlist!!!!
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Sure, this doesn’t sound like a bad idea at all, hooking up with your friend, what could possibly go wrong?
I sat there watching the third touron flirt with him as he poured their drinks. Sure, we are not a couple or anything, but we have been mackin' each other for a while now and who knew that I would suck in this whole no-strings-attached thing? All I know is I was dumb enough to go along with it. This is classic JJ.
I was able to ignore him for most of the night, until now. I saw him getting closer in my periphery but my proud self pretended to be busy talking to Sarah or even looking at the people.
“Can I offer you, ladies, fun?” JJ says handing Sarah a drink and holding out his hand. He waited for my response as Sarah grabbed hers.
“No, thank you,” I tell him without moving an inch.
“C’mon Y/N, I'm already here, just take it.” He insisted
“I’m good Maybank, I need to take care of something actually, I’ll be right back Sarah.” 
Lies, I just didn’t want to stay around him, I don’t even know why I’m this annoyed. For my luck there were a bunch of girls gathered at the bathroom door, Fuck that, I needed another way out. I walked out of the bar on the beach and made my way to the street.
“Hey, Y/N, wait up.” I hear JJ’s voice behind me. 
“Go away JJ” I shout.
“Woah, what are you doing?”. He asks, grabbing my hand.
“I'm going home. Why do you care?.” I said reaching for my keys in the back pocket of my jeans skirt.
“Your home is not this way, what’s wrong?.” he insisted. 
I didn’t answer. JJ snatches the keys out of my hand which made me sigh loud annoyed
“Can I have my keys back please?” 
“Not until you start talking,” he said, pulling me into the back of the bar. “What the hell happened for you to start acting like a brat?”
“I don't know, why don't you ask your new friends?.” I replied with a dry tone. “I didn't know they were your type by the way,” I added, reaching for my keys but JJ was faster and held them high.
His blue eyes narrow with a hint of intrigue on them. A smirk showed up in the corners of his mouth as he realized. “And I had no idea you were the jealous type.” He teases, making you scoff.
“I just don't like being another one in your books, but it's ok, we can end this and you're free to have all the fun in the world.” My cheeks heat up.
“I'm not mackin’ anybody but you Y/N.”
“That’s not what it looks like.” I accuse.
“I’m sorry, did I miss something?.” He said
Damn him, how does he do this? 
I want to kill myself. There’s no way I’ll say a word when he couldn’t be less bothered.
“Fine.” I swallow. “Can I go now?” I try to grab my keys but he keeps them out of my reach again.
“Nope, you’re still pissed,” he says flatly.
“I’m not.”
“Ha.Bullshit.What the fuck happened?” he snaps
“I’m not blind JJ, If you want to go, just go okay? I don't know what I'm still doing here.” I snap back “I’m… I’m done with this.” The words burst out before I could stop them. “Whatever this is. It's done okay?”
JJ’s eyebrows are furrowed. His expression is a mix of confusion and shock. “Why?”
“Because I said so.”
“No way,” he says again. “You can’t just call it off without giving me a good reason.”
“I don't like to see how you look to other girls.”
That sounds insane if I say it out loud. Who the fuck am I?
“Are you telling me you’re not into me anymore? Is that the deal?”
“No. But—”
“There are no ‘buts’, baby doll. It’s a simple yes or no answer,” he whispered, leaning in. My breath hitched. Fuck. His gaze held mine, leaving me unsure if it was anger or just desire.
“I-I don’t have a reason,” I confess trying to escape
“How about I help you clear your mind and decide? How does that sound?” He said putting my keys into his pocket.
Before I can realize it, I’m against the wall and his mouth is inches away from mine. Luckily, I guess, we’re almost hidden between a dumpster and a bunch of cardboard boxes. JJ’s scent made my brain foggier as he pressed his body onto mine.
“Why didn’t you tell me you needed my attention baby?.”
I clench my jaw.
“So you’re still into me?” He places his thighs between both of mine, grinding me against his erection.
I’m trying so hard to focus that it’s impossible for me to reply.
“Something tells me you still do.” His lips brush over my ear, making my nipples sensitive against the lace of my bra. 
I’m frozen in place, it’s ridiculous how wet I’m. Now I remembered why I was so attracted to JJ in the first place.
His blue eyes are deep and penetrating, locked onto mine. I watch him smirk and push the hem of my skirt up, cupping my core. I arched my back under his touch.
JJ doesn’t seem to care that we’re in public, he dips his finger under the crotch of my panties rubbing the wetness. “Yup, seems bout right.” He murmurs as his lips kiss my neck. He pushes one finger inside and my muscles tightenin around it. 
His lips found their way to mine. He’s hesitant for a second watching me lean closer.
“I knew you wouldn’t resist.” He mocks crashing our lips eagerly.
Oh God. This feels sinful. All I can concentrate on is the unbearable pleasure centered between my legs. JJ keeps fingering me as he devours my lips. He bites the bottom of my lip as he breaks the kiss.
“You’re so needy. It’s super hot.” 
“J...People can see us, please.” I whine
“Let’s give them a show then,” JJ adds another finger, curling them inside me, my vision gets dark as hits a spot deep down. I moan embarrassingly loud. I Rock against his hand, no longer protesting.
My vision comes back, focusing when JJ takes his fingers out of me. He unzips his shorts watching me. I should definitely protest to that, someone really might see us. But the only response I could give, was a nod with my head.
JJ flashed me a mischievous smile before sping me around in the wall.
His breath fans over my neck as he lifts my skirt more. I can tell how long I’ll last. JJ has the ability of knowing how my body works. That’s why I collapsed under his touch in seconds. The thrill of everything about this moment also wasn’t a big help. 
JJ gives a deep thrust as his hand is wrapped under my throat. I grip my hands onto JJ’s waist as he increases the pace. 
“I’m not gonna last long princess.” He murmurs as his hands are now on my waist lifting my ass. “You better cum faster.” I spread my legs wider as he says.
Crazy to think that a few minutes ago I was so against the idea of being fucked in public.
JJ flips me over again, this time facing me, he grabs one of my legs to his hips, I wrap around him deepening the contact, JJ gives me a wet kiss on my chest and a big suck on the skin of my neck. The orgasm races through me and leaves me breathless. I feel my legs shake. I held onto JJ’s shoulders as I whined. JJ gives a barely audible groan and buries his head between my neck and shoulder as he pumps into me.
He wasn’t kidding. He comes so fast that is hard to decide whether I should be impressed or tease him about it. He pushed his shaft into me one last time as his hand clamped my tight and hip.
Both of us breathless, we hear voices around us, I push JJ away and shove my dress down. JJ peeks and sees some figures pass us by a few steps away without realizing our presence.
JJ tucks his still-hard cock into his shorts looking to the sides.
“For a person that was talking about giving a show, you look very concerned,” I teased fixing my clothes.
“And for a person who was wet just from talking to me, you still act very bitchy. Didn’t I fucked you right?”
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sammy-halpert · 4 months
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"That's just cute now"
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Author note: I just haven't seen a new fanfic for ages, so here you go!
Warnings: some cursing, rest is pure fluff <3
You and Wilbur are friends since around four years and have moved in together a year ago. It was very common for Wilbur to be either by his computer all day or with his band, but he still uses every break he has to spend it with you, but obviously he doesn't tell you that and makes you belive he has some breaks alone.
You've had a crush on him the day you saw him. His tlal figure towering over you, his soft presence, his little dirty jokes and the British accent were really something for you. The crush had become so big, you noitice everything. You noitice if he has a new piece of clothing, if there is a new picture in his phone case, even if he gets the smallest paper cut you find out.
But again it felt like he just sees you as a close friend. One time you and him had been watching a movie and he had held you, cuddling you. Of course, he was tired and everything. The next few days it felt like he was ignoring you, avoiding eye contact... blushing?
Wilbur left to record a new sorry boys video, till 7pm, currently it's 6:21pm. Cuddled up in your bed, wearing a t-shirt as you are scrolling on your phone, back faced to the bedroom door. Lovejoy is playing in your headphones and the sound of some videos as you scroll by.
After a little but you come across an edit of a certain someone... (I'll add the video you saw because I am very fucking delusional and I need as much detail in everything possible :D)
'Oh fuck' You thought. Being attracted to him and then seeing these videos made you want to kick your legs and giggle like a high-school girl. You really love this man more than you thought. The next thing you know, you find yourself on a rabbit hole on Tik tok and watching the edits of him, saving them one by one and putting them into an photo album of him.
You've been collecting pictures of him since years, taking some yourself and others from the Internet. It feels to weird have so many pictures of your best friend and admiring them every time you couldn't sleep, but you couldn't help it.
After a while of collecting the videos you take your time and start to look at every single video or photo in the album, zoning out a couple times to think of how to confess to him. You know it's the best thing to just tell him straight up, but you had five worries.
What if he says that he doesn't like you back ? That will be the most awkward friendship ever.
Courage. You don't have it when it comes to Wilbur and confessing.
The 'Oh no I'm gonna fuck this up so bad' feeling the second you try to talk to him about it.
He misunderstands you. What if he thinks you said something else? You already had mustered up all your courage and he didn't understand it. No thank you, another time.
What if he immediately ends the friendship? What if he doesn't want to live with someone who has a huge crush on him? Yeah no, not taking that risk.
You are so lost in a trance you don't hear the front door open. The pictures of him just make you feel like you're on a cloud and turn your eyes into hearts. You are indeed hear over heels for him.
"(Name) I'm back!" Wilbur shouted from the front door as he take soft his shoes and jaket. He stops as you don't answer. "(Name)?" He shouted and looked into the direction of your room. He frowns as worry swarms over him. Did something bad happen to you. He hurries and throws his shoes into the corner instead of carefully putting them there.
Headphones still in use and you are still lost in the pictures. You can't get enough of his looks. The pictures really had something and you didn't noitice his steps or shouts of your name.
Wilbur opens your bedroom door without even knocking, too worried. "(Name)?" He sees you on the bed and mentally sighs relifed. You haven't noiticed him yet, and he knows. An idea gets into his mind and he silently sneaks to your bed, your bsck still facing him and the door. He was about to give you a tickle attack before he saw what you are doing. You are... Looking at images of him, and edits? He watches you swipe in the galleries and they never seemed to stop.
A smile creeps up on his face. You like him back?! He couldn't belive it. He was glad he doesn't have to isolate himself anymore after they cuddle because he needs to recharge the act of not liking you that way. But he won't need the act anymore.
Instead of tickling you, he lays down by your side and spoons you, arms wrapping around your waist and a face nuzzled into your neck, a familiar scent entering your nose.
You quickly turn your phone off in hopes he didn't see anything and take off your headphones. "Oh- hi Will. I didn't hear you" You mumble, blushing. Usually you never cuddle expect for when watching movies. "Mmh... I know" He hummed into your neck.
Spooning isn't your favourite cuddling position so you turn around and nuzzle onto him, head resting on his chest. He pulls you closer and caresses your hair.
What is going on? He is never that affectionate. Like never. Not even while watching movies. Did something happen?
"I see you've spent your time missing me?" You could hear the smile in his voice as clear as day, his hand now resting on your arm, thumb strocking you. "What?" It came out of your mouth without thinking any further and a chuckle moves his chest.
"I mean, you must have missed me a lot that you didn't even hear me come home, because you were too busy staring at my photos." HE SAW THAT?! Now that's where embarrassment becomes cringing. Oh please just make him think you are playing a prank on him, but he knows you're not that big of a prankster. The furthest you go is make him say 'Ben Dover.'
"I was cleaning up my gallery" You mumble and bury your face into his chest. This is so embarrassing. It seems he's catching into that crush of yours, but he seems very cool with it.
"That's just cute now" He mumbles under his breath with a soft chuckle. "(Name). I know that if you have more than eighr pictures of the same guy in a row in your gallery, you are simpinggg" He says in a teasing tone but he was dead serious. "You wanna say I have a crush on you?" You scoff, trying your best to make it seem like you find it funny that he's apperantly so wrong.
Wilbur sighs. "You won't say it so I will." A soft hand comes up from your arm and gently pushes you s bit away so you can look at him without breaking your neck and then comes to your chin, tilting it up to look at him. Then he comes up close, his nose only an inch from you." I love you. Not bestie way. The romantic way." He leans in but centimeters befor your lips he stops. Puppy eyes look into yours and you feel his breath again your lips as he asks in a whisper. "May I? Please"
You know Wilbur is a huge gentle man, so it wasn't a big suprise he asked for concent and to be honest, you liked it a lot. A nod from you was all it took and his lips are now pressed against yours. The hand on your chin moves up to your cheek as the other tone is tucked under you and on your back.
Butterflies fill both of your stomach's as your lips move rhythmically against each other. After a moment or two he pulls away and looks at you with this familiar look in his eyes. Before this you always saw those eyes as his normal rest look, but now you realise, it was a look of love. He had looked at you so many times with this look you thought it was his rest look, but his actual resting face was around his other friends. Around you, he's the softest softie you'll ever know.
An adorable smile curls his lips and you couldn't help but smile back. He holds you close and you wrap your ams around him aswell, cuddling onto his warm and soft presence.
"You're mine now, (Name)"
"Gladly"
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seasonsbloom · 2 years
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ocean in a seashell . ( rooster )
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pairing ; bradley bradshaw x female!reader
synopsis ; bradley has lived with his father’s ghost for long enough to know he’ll never make the same mistakes he did. and then he meets you.
wc ; 10.5k i'm sorry
warnings ; 18+ only, minors do NOT interact; bradley bradshaw's sad, sad life; angst, literally SO much angst; mentions of canon past character death; near-death experience; alcohol abuse; explicit language; explicit sexual content (breeding kink, cumplay, p in v, dirty talk, fingering, idk?)
note: ... yeah i don't fucking know either goodbye. stole the title from "sidelines" by phoebe bridgers aka god.
sol. sunderlust... none of this would be possible without you, thank you forever.
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Bradley doesn’t remember much about his father.
These days, he recalls him only in fractions: Hawaiian shirts, mustache, hair that stood up spikey like grass covered in the first tentative November frost. He had big hands, Bradley remembers that, and he used to swing him up on his shoulders and let him ride around living rooms in Army commissioned houses they never stayed in longer than a few months. He always smelled of engine oil, and he played pianos like he didn’t even know the meaning of the word embarrassment.
Bradley based his whole life on the fading glimpses of that man he carries locked in the chambers of his heart. The older he gets, the more gaps he finds.
Suddenly he’s taller than Goose ever was, older, ranked higher. He wants to say, wait, hold on, go back. Wants to rewind to a time when he felt closer to his father, when he could remember what his voice sounded like, what it felt like when he tucked him into bed. When he thought if he just sat by the front door long enough, his father would inevitably walk through it again, hoist him into the air, and press tickling kisses to his cheeks.
Sometimes, Bradley wishes he could go back to when he thought bad things happened only in movies. When he had a father and a mother and an uncle and the bone-deep, unconscious conviction that things would always stay this way.
He can’t remember the day Goose died. Can’t remember Mav coming to the house, can’t remember the dog tags pressed into his mother’s hands. Strange how the most significant day of his little life remains in his memory as just another day - morning cartoons and PB&J sandwiches and his mom reading him a bedtime story. Part of Bradley thinks it’s unfair, his whole world crashing down and him not even remembering it. Like he’s arriving late for a movie and can’t make sense of the plot.
Not once did he see his mother cry over his father. He’s sure she must have shed tears, remembers now the empty tissue boxes and the eyes rimmed in red, understands now what he was too young to see then. But Carol carried her grief like a secret. She locked it behind the mahogany of her bedroom door, she hid it behind the veneer of her smile.
Bradley is nineteen, standing at his mother’s open grave, when he decides he’s never going to do to someone what Goose did to her. What he did to him.
For a while, he wants nothing to do with the memory of that man. Wraps himself in his mother, toys with the idea of taking her maiden name. Goes to college and gets drunk, gets high, gets himself into trouble. Thinks sometimes, in his very darkest moments, that maybe the best thing he could do for the world is to stop existing.
One night lands him at the police station. And it’s not like he got arrested or anything, they just take him in to sober up and tell him to call somebody to come get him. Mav is in town, thank God, and he comes in wearing his old aviator jacket and a wistful expression. Bradley’s call probably pulled him out of some bar or some girl or both.
Mav doesn’t say much, just drives him back to his college dorm and pulls over to the curb, doesn’t even turn off the car. They sit there in silence, with the blinker going and the engine purring.
Finally, Mav says, “Sometimes, you remind me so much of your father, it scares me.”
Bradley doesn’t know what to say to that, so he says nothing. Sits there for a little longer and watches as frat bros and law students and cheerleaders cross the street on their way to hook-ups, to parties, to midnight fast food runs. Envies them just for a moment. Then, without saying goodbye, gets out of the car, goes to his room, and buries himself beneath the weight of his blankets.
So it’s like Bradley always suspected. It really is a futile thing, trying to escape the memory of his father. His ghost lives inside Bradley’s chest. Rattles against his bones.
And he loves him, even if he doesn’t remember him. Thinks that love is some intrinsic, primordial thing. Something that was there before he was born and will be there after he dies. Something he can’t fight. Unstoppable like the tide.
So he embraces it instead. Tries growing a mustache he’ll only be able to pull off much later in life, gets those old Hawaiian shirts out of storage. Decides to give into the underlying current of longing he’s felt every time he tipped his head back and looked at the sky.
Accepting that he loves his father is much easier than he thought it would be. Much easier than hating him.
It’s good for a while because it feels like he has a purpose, a goal. For so long, Bradley has been drifting at sea, unmoored, unbound, with no sense of direction. Now he’s swimming toward something, broad strokes, every move deliberate.
Then Mav pulls his papers.
The worst part of it all, worse than the betrayal, worse than the anger, is the confusion. He thought Mav would understand. Mav of all people. 
(It’s his mother, setting a casserole on the table, smiling at Bradley and saying Pete over here, he’s the craziest pilot the Navy’s ever seen. It’s his sixth Christmas, the second one without his dad, and Mav gives him a model of a plane they’ll build together. It’s Mav staring at him with eyes gleaming with moisture the time he stole the Navy hat from his uncle’s head. It’s Mav in every memory of his life, laced so tightly to him he thought they were inseparable, woven together. Now the seams are coming apart.)
Mav, who keeps flying, who seems only to be a real, complete person for those few, short, fleeting moments just after he steps off a plane. Who’s never happy unless he’s going break-neck speed miles and miles above the ground, jumping off death’s shovel, laughing, flipping the bird, and saying look, I can fly!
If Maverick doesn’t understand why Bradley wants to fly, why he needs to fly, then who ever could?
Mav wants to explain it, calls him, shows up at his apartment. Bradley declines the calls, turns off all the lights, and sits on his couch in perfect silence, pretending he isn’t in.
He doesn’t want to hear explanations, doesn’t want to listen to excuses. He wants to fly.
Back when his mother was alive, she wouldn’t even let him get on an airplane. His whole childhood, they only left their state once to go to a funeral of some distant aunt or cousin or uncle, Bradley can’t remember, and his mother drove the whole ten hours there and back. It didn’t even register as anything weird to him - it was all juice boxes and gas station ice cream and goldies on the radio. It was his mom’s laughter and her smile and her fingers carding strands of hair warmed by the sun out of his eyes.
So Bradley remembers his mother every time he gets into a car. But his dad? Him, he can only get above the clouds.
He doesn’t give up. He finishes college, works odd jobs for some money, drifts further and further from the orbit he used to inhabit. And then he applies to the academy again, and then he goes to Top Gun, and he graduates top of his class and wonders what it would feel like if there were somebody to be proud of him. If somebody were congratulating him, taking him out for a celebratory dinner, or just somebody to hug him. What it would feel like if he weren’t so alone.
It’s what he dreams about sometimes, in the very darkest pockets of the night. A house with a swing set and a big, smiling, dumb dog and a pretty wife and a whole gaggle of children running through the garden. Bradley would teach them how to throw a football, and he’d carry them to bed at night, and his wife would smile at him, and there would always be food in the fridge and brownies on the table, and every room would be filled with love, and there would be no ghosts to haunt him.
It’s a dangerous fantasy. It’s a trap door, a slippery slope, it’s a snare, it’s a cliff’s edge. If he stays in it too long, he’ll be lost.
His mother always used to say he was a functional dreamer. He had his head stuck in the clouds, sure, but he knew exactly when to pull it out of there too. Maybe that’s why he’s such a good pilot.
So Bradley still is a functional dreamer. He knows that this is something he can never have, can never allow himself to have. He knows the pain of it too well, too intimately, still feels it every time he catches sight of his reflection in a mirror, the golden streaks of sun in his hair, the mustache, the split second of pure, blank horror, of oh god I look like him, I look so much like him, and feels it slice right through him like a knife through butter. He’s been carrying his father’s ghost for so long, sometimes it feels like his spine will crack under the weight.
Maybe people that live life like he does, like Mav does, like his father did - up in the sky, heads in the clouds - aren’t meant to have anything on the ground. Inevitably, they always end up leaving it.
He decided the day of his mother’s funeral, before the long procession of I’m sorrys and If you need anythings, before he let real estate agents into a house overflowing with cards and flowers - flowers in every room, flowers blooming and wilting and dying like a garden watered by his grief, like a garden watered by his ghosts - that he would never have a family. Not a wife to mourn him, not a child to miss him.
So there’ll be nobody to carry the burden of him.
And then he meets you.
It’s not momentous - it’s easy. Natural. Quicker than he thought possible. It’s stolen glances across a room and a smile that brands him like a mark, that cuts right through to the bone. A smile that settles in his heart. A smile that’ll never leave again.
In the beginning, he tries to fight it. Tells himself not to engage, not to get involved, to stay out of the mess he knows he’ll make here inevitably. To shield him, but to shield you too, to protect you from whatever hurt he’s going to inflict sooner or later.
But then it goes like this:
“Are you never going to ask me out, Bradshaw?” you ask him, smiling as you pluck his Ray Bans from him, as you place them on your own nose, and blink at him from over the rims.
The sun is casting you in gold. Bradley wants to catch the moment in a mason jar and put it on his bedside table. Let the glow illuminate his nights.
“I don’t think….” He trails off, wonders why it’s so easy for him to talk to you, why he can’t stop spilling truths like leaking water taps. “I don’t think I’ll be good for you.”
You don’t miss a beat. One eyebrow raising, you say, “And don’t you think that should be my decision?”
That’s when he knows that for him, you will always be it. That it’ll never be this way again with someone else. It’s not even a question. It’s just the truth.
When he’s with you, for the first time since he sat shotgun in a car with his mother, head nodding along to Elvis on the radio, Bradley feels like he belongs somewhere. Like he’s reached a shore, maybe. Like he can breathe.
For the first time, it feels like he knows peace, even with his feet on the ground.
His mother would have loved you.
You have a long conversation about it. About how he knows you want it - the diapers and the first days of school and the family Christmases. The pitter-patter of children’s feet, the cribs, the tiny fingers curling around your thumb. He knows you’ve dreamed of it all your life. And Bradley also knows, as much as it hurts, as much as it aches, that he can never give it to you.
He needs to be honest. He needs to put all the cards on the table so you know your options, see the truth about him. So you can walk away before you get any deeper into this.
Part of him is sure you will. Thinks it might be better, the safest option for both of you. Hopes you will, fears you will.
It doesn’t matter that he loves you. It doesn’t matter that he only feels at peace when he’s with you. It doesn’t matter that for the first time since he was four years old, the ghosts have gone quiet.
What matters is that he wants you to be happy. What matters is that if that happiness lies somewhere else, with someone else, with someone who’ll give you everything you dream of, give you a life, give you a child… Bradley will let you go. It’ll be the hardest thing he’s ever done, but he will.
Only you don’t leave.
You think about it for a very, very long time. Sit at his kitchen table with your hands folded on the tablecloth like you’re praying, with your head turned down, without looking at him, and then finally you say, “Alright. Fine with me.”
And Bradley’s protesting, pushing, saying, “Honey, you want this, I know you do, you want a family, you….”
“I want you more,” you say, and that’s that.
There’s no lie to it. It’s the truth, naked and beautiful and awful.
And Bradley - selfish as he is - accepts it. Because he doesn’t want to lose you. Because as much as he tries to convince himself of the opposite, deep down, he knows he’s not a good man. Just like his father wasn’t. They’re both just men willing to leave the people they love behind. Brave enough to fight for the “greater good”, but never brave enough to stay.
Regardless of it all, it’s the happiest Bradley has been in years. With you, he doesn’t feel like something is missing from him. He actually feels whole.
Your job as a freelancer allows you to travel with him, and he’s unspeakably grateful for it. He tries to show you, tries to be good about bringing flowers and cooking dinner, thinks if he can make you even a fraction as happy as you make him, he’ll have succeeded. When he gets deployed, he spends days memorizing your face, the shape of your throat where your pulse point jumps, the pattern of your heartbeat, the feeling of you beneath his arm.
And sometimes, when you’re asleep, Bradley puts his hand on your stomach and imagines a bump there, imagines a baby growing beneath it, and that’s when the ache gets so strong he thinks he can’t breathe.
That’s when he hates himself for not being something else: a doctor, an accountant, a real estate agent. Anything other than what he is. Could he have it then, this thing you both want so much? Could he let himself have it?
But eventually, when the fantasies fade, he always circles back to the truth: Bradley isn’t a doctor or an accountant or a real estate agent. He’s a pilot. Always has been, always will be.
He’s just too much like his father. That’s the whole point.
When he gets called back to Top Gun, three years after he met you, something shifts. He doesn’t know to explain it, but from the very first moment he sets foot on North Island again, something about it tastes like the beginning of an end. At night, he can’t settle, roams through the little house you rent off base like a sleepwalker. Checks in on you like he’s afraid you’re going to disappear. Can’t concentrate up in the air, can’t shut his brain off.
It’s like his father’s ghost travels with him in his suitcases, tucked between his neatly folded shirts, climbs out when no one’s looking. No matter where he goes, that ghost goes too. He can’t shake him.
You love California. You like the sunshine and the ocean. Like the Hard Deck and Penny and Phoenix. Turn your face into the warmth like a sunflower, and then you bloom, go brighter and brighter as Bradley goes the opposite direction. As something in him dims.
“Is it because of Mav?” you ask him softly, in the quiet of your bedroom. You’re carding hair from his forehead, fingers gentle, voice gentler.
Bradley can’t look at you. Shame coils low in his stomach.
“Yes,” he says, even if it feels like a lie in his mouth.
You sigh, no annoyance, only affection. Your head is heavy on his shoulder as you press the shape of a yawn into his skin.
“I know he hurt you, Bradley,” you whisper. “It’s okay to be hurt. But I think you need to talk to him.”
He nods into the darkness. You’re right. You’re always right.
“I know,” he agrees, even though he knows he won’t.
When you’re asleep, Bradley slips out of bed. Pats into the living room and sits on the floor, back leaning against the couch. Pulls his knees up to his chest, closes his eyes, and then he dreams.
He dreams he’s four riding on his father’s shoulders through the living room. He dreams he’s ten, in a car with his mother, turning up the radio. He dreams he’s twenty, and he lets Mav explain. He dreams he’s thirty-five, and he marries you. He dreams he’s thirty-six and holding his baby. He dreams it’s a little girl with your smile and his eyes, and he loves her more than he thought he was capable of, so much it almost breaks him apart, so much it puts him back together. So much it’s worth it all.
Bradley’s earliest memory is of the giant, bone-white seashell on his grandmother’s mantlepiece. He remembers how heavy it was, remembers how cold it felt against the side of his face when he pressed it to his ear. He remembers hearing the distant, muffled hum of the waves, the song of the sea, remembers imagining what it might look like. 
It’s no comparison to the real thing, years and years and years later, he knows this, but it’s something. It’s better than nothing.
It’s all he can allow himself—an ocean in a seashell.
The mission is a disaster, even if it is successful. Later, Bradley won’t remember what he was thinking up in the air, when he hit the target, when Mav went down, when he decided to go after him. He won’t even be able to tell if that is because he’s in shock or because he really wasn’t thinking anything. Maybe for the first time in his life.
If he had been thinking, Bradley likes to believe he would have kept his plane on course. Would have flown back to the carrier and then back to you, home, home, home. Wouldn’t have gone back for a man he still hasn’t spoken to, not properly, someone he loved once and now barely knows.
But all the ghosts of the people he’s loved and lost crowd up on him in that cockpit - his father and his mother and even Admiral Kazansky and their sad, sad eyes. There’s no room for Mav to be up there, too, he thinks.
So at first, you don’t cross his mind at all. He just follows his instincts like he’s never done before, could never bring himself to do. So much of Bradley’s life has been about dissecting just those urges, dismantling them, disabling them. Making himself into a creature of logic and second-guessing. Now, for the first time, he gives in to the currents and lets himself be rushed away.
And then his plane goes down, and he drifts into the white white white of snow he hasn’t felt in so long - and still, he doesn’t think. But every instinct from the moment of impact on, the moment his feet hit the ground, every instinct centers on you.
Home, he thinks. I need to get home to her.
Up in that F-14, that’s when he realizes. The brink of death is a bleak place. It’s a place of memories, a place of despair. It’s a place of hope.
All he can think of is you. How he’s leaving you with nothing. How he’s going to die here, miles above the ocean, and what will happen then? Who’s going to bring you his dog tags, the way Mav had brought his father’s to Carole all those years ago? Phoenix? Hangman? How are they even going to retrieve them if he goes down in enemy territory? Will anybody even remember the girl in that house, the one he didn’t even marry? And why didn’t he anyway? Why didn’t he put a ring on your finger, buy you a house, get you a dog, give you a baby?
What will remain of him now, in this world after he’s gone?
Nothing, he thinks, and his lungs fill with water, high up in the sky. You made damn sure of that, Bradley.
There will be nobody to haunt. He will disappear, and he will take his mother with him, will take his father with him, will take Mav with him. Nobody to remember him. Nobody to mourn him except you, all alone, carrying the terrible burden of his ghost.
It used to be a relief. Nobody to mourn me after I’m gone. Now it feels like a punishment.
Home, he thinks, remembering the content of your smile and your eyes gleaming in the darkness and your face turning, always turning, toward the sun. Like a child, as he closes his eyes, as he tries to accept the inevitable, he thinks, I want to go home. I just want to go home.
And then that’s what he does—he and Mav. Incredibly, inexplicably, illogically, they go home.
From far away, as he walks up the driveway, the little house with the gardenias you planted blooming pink and red in front of the windows looks like an oasis at first. Then it seems to grow longer, taller, goes from beckoning to daunting. He almost doesn’t make it inside. Almost doesn’t dare to get out his keys, unlock the front door, push through and toe off his shoes. Feels like he’s doing something forbidden, like he’s an unwanted guest in his own home.
You’re in the kitchen, elbows deep in sudsy dishwater, and when he walks through the doorway, when you hear the pat of his socked feet against the tiled floors, you look up at him with an open face full of love, full of relief. It almost bowls him over.
“Bradley,” you whisper, voice soft, and then you’re crossing the room, bubbles and foam and water dripping from your wrists across the tile, and he blinks at the trail you leave for a moment. Then you’re there, arms wrapping around his neck, face pressing against his shoulder, saying his name again and again, like a benediction, like a prayer of thanks.
Automatically, he pulls you against him with both arms crossed over your hips. Inhales deep, lets the familiar scent of you envelop him. Listens to your breath echoing against the dip of his collarbone, to the steady rhythm of your heart.
Your hands leave wet prints against the fabric of his shirt, like something primeval pressed to cave walls, like something that’s been happening for centuries, something that is happening right now, something that will happen again tomorrow and next year and the year after that, and distantly, dumbly, Bradley thinks, Oh. I’m alive. I’m here.
He feels packed in cotton. He feels submerged. He feels not-real, not-present, not-normal. He feels like he’s going to fall apart, and no one will notice.
When you draw back, it takes you only a split second to realize something’s wrong. You frown, the furrow Bradley likes to smooth out with his thumb appearing between your eyebrows, eyes swimming with a concern he doesn’t deserve.
“What happened?”
It’s classified, all of it. There’s so much of his life Bradley isn’t allowed to share with you, even if he wants to. There’s so much he doesn’t want to share but knows he should.
From far away, he hears himself say, “My plane went down.”
He can feel the panic in your body, feels it go through you like a spasm. You try to draw back, but he holds you where you are, afraid he’s going to shatter all across the kitchen floor the moment you’re gone.
It’s not fair, he thinks, how he keeps looking to you to hold him together. It’s just that at the end of the day, you’ve always been so much stronger than him.
“Bradley…” you begin to say, but he can’t hear it. He doesn’t want to hear it. He doesn’t want to hear how scared you are every time he leaves, he doesn’t want to hear how it made you feel to know that he almost died because he already knows. He knows.
“I want…” he says into your hair, a fragment of a sentence, a statement that trails off halfway, that goes nowhere. He doesn’t even know what he’s trying to say.
In some ways, he feels stuck in that F-14. Like time kept moving, but he didn’t, remained static and crystallized like somebody dipped the moment in amber and preserved it on a bookshelf. Nothing makes sense to him. Rationally, he knows he’s standing here in his kitchen with you in his arms, knows he isn’t dead, knows he survived, but it doesn’t feel like it. 
So Bradley tries to remember grounding exercises, focuses on little things, mundane things, things that shouldn’t exist on the verge of death. The bubbles popping in the sink. The specks of dust dancing through the room. The curve of your spine beneath the worn fabric of his Navy shirt.
Suddenly, the thought of you alone in this house is unbearable. Waiting for a man that never comes back. History repeating itself in the worst of ways.
“I want to have a baby,” he says, out of nowhere, out of some madness that took hold of him up in the air, or maybe when he touched the ground, or maybe at some other point he can’t name, can’t even think.
And it’s not a conscious thought. It’s not a decision he makes. It’s just something that spills from him, something that has been there unnoticed all along, words taking shape on his tongue before he can overthink their meaning, but then they’re out, and they drop between you like an anvil, and it’s like a relief, it’s like a breath he’s been holding for years, it’s like a sigh, something inside of him finally unlatching, finally escaping the shackles he put on it himself.
Oh, he thinks. He’s known this about himself, always, but it’s the first time he says it out loud. It’s always been a want, an ache, a yearning, but now it goes from all that to a need, a thrumming inside of him, something that cannot be ignored. Something that demands to be felt instead of thought.
In his arms, you stiffen.
With your palms on his chest, you push him away from you, take a step back, take the warmth and the scent and the anchor with you. Bradley is surprised he doesn’t float right up to the ceiling.
The openness of your face has shuttered now. You look at him with something unreadable crossing your features, something unfamiliar, and say, “What did you just say?”
Bradley swallows around a lump in his throat. “I want to have a baby,” he repeats, his voice smaller now, quieter, but the words more assured.
Because he does. Because it’s true. Because he’s always wanted this and doesn’t know how to explain to you that now he needs it. How now it’s the only thing that makes sense in a world that’s gone off the rails.
Your face falls, something crumbles, and it hits him like a punch to the gut. 
“No,” you say, turning away from him. You step right into the trail of water you left earlier, it soaks into your socks, and then you’re leaving footprints too. Everywhere you go, you leave your mark like a brand. Not one part of Bradley has been left untouched.
Confusion zaps through him, but it’s a muted feeling. Muffled by all the chaos.
“I thought you….” It’s a great effort to form words, like pulling teeth. “You want children. Don’t you want this?”
“Not like…” You pause, rake your fingers through your hair, exasperation crackling from you like sparks from a burned-out socket, and Bradley can’t make sense of it.
You want this, he knows you do. So what’s the problem now? What did he do wrong?
“I don’t….”
“Don’t go there.”
There’s a finality to your voice, and he sees you drawing back from him, sees your shoulders come up, your face turning away, something wilting.
The idea of losing you, of pushing you away now that he’s finally decided to let you in, really let you in, the panic of it finally slices through the haze. Lifts the fog.
Bradley crosses the room and says, “It’s your decision too, honey, of course, it is, but I love you, and I want this, and….”
You whirl on him, and it punches the air out of his lungs. There’s real anger on your face now, your eyes sparkling with unshed tears, and Bradley’s heart clenches in answer.
“You don’t get to do this,” you say, voice heaving with the barely contained emotion, a ship on a stormy sea, “not after I compromised, not after I spent so long trying to get used to the idea of not having a baby, not after giving that up for you, Bradley. You don’t… don’t get to just come in here and change your mind just because it suits you, because you had some near-death experience and you’re full of adrenaline and… and….”
Bradley frowns, moves to touch you, but you flinch away from him, one arm going up to hug your own ribcage. As if you have to shield yourself from him.
Suddenly, he feels a sob building in his throat. To realize how much he’s hurt you, not just today by springing this on you, but by how selfish he was, again and again. By letting his past stand in the way of your future.
“It’s not that I changed my mind,” he begins, trying to string together something that will make you see the truth of it, make you understand what he means.
You interrupt, “You said you didn’t want kids.”
Bradley pauses. Did he say that? If he did… 
“And it…” You gasp for breath, the tears now streaming freely down your face, and god, it hurts, it hurts worse than thinking he lost Mav, hurts worse than thinking he’d die in that F-14 because all of that he’d been prepared for, had been practicing for his whole life. Losing Maverick, losing himself, all of that had been inevitable. But losing you… Bradley always assumed he was going to be the one to go first. 
“It’s fine,” you go on. “I was fine with it, Bradley, I gave that dream up because… because I wanted you more, and I was okay with it. It was my decision, and I don’t regret it, but for you to just… to just….”
“I do want children,” he says because he doesn’t know what to do except explain it, except make you see the truth of it all. “I’ve always… I’ve always wanted children, honey. I just… after what happened to my dad, after what that did to me, what it did to my mother, I didn’t… I didn’t want to do that to you. I couldn’t do that to you.”
For a moment, you say nothing, eyebrows furrowed, lower lip caught between your teeth.
“You…” You look like you’re trying very hard to understand it. “Are you saying you decided not to have children with me because you thought it would hurt me too much if you died?”
When you say it like that, out loud, logically, through your tears, it sounds so incredibly stupid.
Bradley opens and closes his mouth, once, twice. Finally, he nods.
He expects you to start crying harder, to hit him (all valid reactions, really), but instead, you do the one thing he doesn’t expect: You laugh. It’s a watery sound, barely amused, but it is a laugh.
You bury your face in your hands, then reemerge after a moment, eyes rimmed in red, and say, “God, Bradley, you’re so stupid.”
“I…” He doesn’t know what to say to that. Probably, you’re right. “What?”
“You just…” You exhale a long, shuddering breath. “You keep trying to make decisions without me.”
“... I do?”
“Yeah!” Your voice rises a little, then settles, and you say, “This is my decision as much as it’s yours. If I say I want it, if I say I know the risk and I know the danger, then you don’t get to tell me no. Do you think I’m dumb? Do you think I don’t understand what goes on when you get deployed? Do you think I don’t know that you’re risking your life all the time?”
“No, I… I know you know that.”
You shrug, and it’s a gesture of such helplessness that Bradley’s knees almost buckle.
“I don’t know what’s going to happen tomorrow. I don’t know if… if one day there’s going to be a mission you don’t come back from. I don’t know that, Bradley. I can’t know that. But until then… can’t you just let us be happy?”
Bradley’s shaking. Head to toe, tremors that run through him like the tides. Unstoppable. Unrelenting.
“I…” And he knows he’s the one who brought it up, but suddenly all the doubts come crashing down. Suddenly the ghosts crowd around him. “What if I die? What if I leave you? What if we have a baby and I’m not… there?”
“Oh, Bradley…” Something on your face melts. You step closer, put a hand on his cheek, fingertips still pruned from the water, and say, so gently it breaks something open inside of him, “Bradley. You’re not your father.”
And Bradley can’t help it - he cries. It’s an ugly sort of crying, the sort that leaves you with a headache and snot dripping down your face and eyes that hurt. The one you feel in the morning. But it’s a relief too. A release. Rain after years and years of drought.
For so long, Bradley was trying to let go of a world that didn’t want him to leave. He’s been preparing for an early exit since he entered, has been so caught up in dreaming he forgot to live. So caught up in thinking he forgot to do. He thought he would be content to go out of this world and leave nothing behind, to disappear without a trace, without a word, without a ghost.
But now he sees it clearly. Now he understands.
Bradley doesn’t want to stop existing. He wants to cling to this world like someone clinging to the edge of a cliff, like a leech, like a cancer. He wants to haunt someone.
Only there’s something else, too. 
A week before his mother died, when she had gone all quiet, when she had lost the vibrancy she used to carry around like a glow, when she had slept longer and spoke less and Bradley had known, somewhere deep inside of him, that things were ending, that they were truly ending, he’d gathered all his courage and asked a question he’d been rehearsing for weeks, months, years.
“Do you regret it?”
Do you regret loving my father now, knowing all that would come after? Knowing the landslide it really was?
And Carol had just smiled, something of that old light returning for a moment, a tenderness so big it felt like violence, and she’d said, “I could never regret him. Not even the heartbreak or the grief or the pain. After all, he gave me you, didn’t he?”
Maybe, he thinks, it’s time to let the past be in the past. Maybe it’s time to let himself have a future.
Maybe it’s time to let go of the ghost.
And you just hold him as he cries like he hasn’t since he locked himself in a bathroom stall after his mother’s funeral, cries until it feels like he’s going to throw up, cries until the gnashing teeth of grief of pain of hurt of anger finally leave him be.
After half an eternity, you pull away, warm hands cupping his face, tugging him gently away from the crook of your neck, so he has to look at you, can’t look anywhere but at you, and then you say, “Bradley, what happened to your father was a horrible, terrible accident. But he loved you. You know that, don’t you?”
He nods. His father, the hazy shape of him, the ghost he’s carried for so long - frosted tips and Hawaiian shirts and the smell of motor oil. Large hands and a mustache and rides around living rooms. So much of him is shadowed, fractioned, incomplete, but not this. This he knows. When he thinks of his father, there’s nothing now but the hazy, easy warmth of love. 
“Do you really think,” you say softly, “that they made a mistake when they had you? Your parents? Do you really think they shouldn’t have done it?”
Bradley has thought about his life in boxes. Big cardboard ones, the kind you get when you move apartments. He tucks the good parts away beneath his bed, stows them, hoards them like a secret. Like his mother kept her grief. But all the bad parts - the pain and the sadness and the sorrow - those he lets pile up everywhere, in hallways, in living rooms, on kitchen tables. He stumbles over them on his way to the bathroom. He stubs his toe halfway to the closet.
He never looks at those good parts, afraid they’ll become tainted somehow if he thinks about them for too long, afraid they’ll lose their appeal or their strength. But there’s so much good there too.
Goose loved him, he knows this without a doubt. Carole loved him. Mav loves him, Phoenix loves him, you love him… At the end of it all, even despite all the terrible things that have happened to him, even with the ghosts that have haunted him for so long, Bradley has been loved, and he has lived, and he has been happy.
Shouldn’t that be worth something, too?
“No,” he says, voice soft, “no, I’m glad they had me.”
His life has been a long, long road. Difficult to walk sometimes, full of potholes, some as big as canyons. But there’s so much happiness there, too - car rides with his mother, Mav telling him stories about his father, the moment when the wheels lift off the tarmac at take-off. This long, terrible, winding road that led him here. That led him to you.
You brush your fingertips across his cheekbone, and Bradley capsizes.
“I love you,” he says, and it’s the truest thing he’s ever said. It’s the truest thing he’s ever known. “I want… I want to have a life with you.”
“You do,” you answer. “You have one.”
Bradley’s tears have dried so the sound he makes isn’t really a sob, but it’s damn close to one. 
“Do you…” He clears his throat. “You love me, too?”
It’s a dumb question, unnecessary because he already knows the answer. But he needs to hear you say it anyway.
And when you smile, your whole face lights up. It echoes somewhere inside Bradley, somewhere at his core, goes through him like a current.
“Bradley Bradshaw,” you say, and there’s only a little bit of amusement in your voice, “you’re the love of my life.”
His heart jumps like a jackknife in his chest.
Before he recognizes that he’s made the conscious decision to do so, he’s bridged the space between you and has pulled you into a searing, soaring, slow kiss. He fumbles it a little, teeth knocking against yours, but you just laugh into it, going up on your tiptoes, arms wrapping around his neck, pulling yourself closer to him like you want to meld yourself to his bones. Bradley feels like somebody’s poured liquid sunlight into his chest.
Somewhere it goes heated, goes desperate, goes near frantic, all the adrenaline, all the fear, everything pouring from him in a shower of want. Somehow he’s got you pressed up against the counter, tongue tangled with yours, fingers in your hair, fingers on your back, fingers pulling up the edge of the shirt you’ve stolen from him to find the warm, soft skin beneath.
Breathless, heart stuttering, Bradley pulls away, looks at your lips swollen from the tug of his teeth, your eyes with the heavy lids, the hair mussed by his fingers, and he needs to hear it. Needs to know you want this as much as he does. The ache in him twists like a knife between the ribs.
“Tell me,” he whispers, afraid the moment will shatter if he makes a wrong move, speaks too loudly. It’s so fragile - he wants to protect it so fiercely. Presses the tips of his fingers into the place where your pulse hammers away. “Tell me you want to have a baby with me.”
“I want…” And you sigh, a sound like a spring day, a sound like a rushing mountain stream. “I want it.”
He surges forward, lips against yours again, and you’re so alive beneath him, heart racing, breath heaving, fingers grappling along his neck, his shoulders, his chest, his arms, and Bradley wants to devour you. Wants to sink his teeth into all this life and never let it go again. He wants to exist, right here, in this moment with you forever.
“I love you,” he mumbles into your neck, lets his mouth move over the column of your throat, down to the sharp points of your collarbones beneath the soft skin. Sinks to his knees on the kitchen tiles like he’s kneeling at an altar to pray.
“Bradley,” you whisper, fingers going to tangle in his hair, to smooth along the sides of his face, and the softness in your voice cracks something in him. He swears he could cry again.
He doesn’t even know what he’s doing as he nuzzles his nose against the sloping curve of your upper thigh, as his fingers tighten on your hips. He just wants to be close to you. And you’re so soft, so warm, you smell like home, and it tears through him, blazes everything in its wake, to realize just how close he came to losing it all.
“I’m gonna marry you,” he whispers, babbles, barely coherent, pressing his face against the fabric of your panties, inhaling your scent, opening his mouth to push his tongue where he knows your clit is. “Gonna make you so happy, baby, I promise, it’s all I want. I’m never letting you go again, I’m never….”
Above him, you whimper, hips knocking forward, arching into the movement of his tongue for a moment, and he wonders if you’re wet, thinks about the hot, tight vice of your cunt, and groans against you. His cock jumps.
Then you’re tugging him away from you by the hair, and Bradley goes reluctantly, mouth still open, wishing he could stay where he was forever. Drowning in you. 
You’re looking down at him with eyes blown wide.
“Bradley,” you say, and there’s something unsteady to your voice. “Take me to bed.”
He doesn’t need to be told twice. It’s a tumble all the way to your bedroom - he kicks off his shoes on the way, you lose your shirt, and he’s somehow, miraculously, gotten down to his boxers by the time he drags you backward with him onto the mattress.
“I love you,” he says as he drags you on top of him, your legs opening around his hips like the petals of a flower. The mattress dips where your knees press against the springs, your weight grounds him. “I love you, you’re so perfect, you’re….”
He has no idea what he’s saying. His brain checked out a while ago, and it’s all just feelings now, just emotions coursing through him, and every once in a while, one will plunge its head through the surface, and then he’ll tell you something nonsensical, something dumb, something important, something he needs you to know, something…
You lean down to kiss him, to shut him up, his brain buzzes, your breasts press to his bare chest, and he’s so hard in his boxers it hurts.
“I love you, too,” you whisper against his lips, smile into the kiss. The curve of it burns against Bradley’s face.
He sits up, grasps you by the thighs to drag you closer, drag your core across his cock, and you both moan against each other. Your fingernails scrape over the back of his neck, where his hair is buzzed so short he knows it feels like prickles, and he shudders, sighs, lets his tongue run across your teeth.
For a while, you just stay like that, rutting against each other like fucking teenagers, tongues lazy, fingers eager, mouths hungry. Even through your panties, he can feel your wetness, wonders if it’s going to leave stains on his underwear, across his thighs. Bradley thinks he’s going to die, but this time it’s nothing like it was up in the F-14.
It’s difficult in your position, awkward, but he gets a finger first on your clit, and then, when he finds you wet and swollen and open, he slides it right inside you. Watches your face as you squeeze your eyes shut, as your mouth falls open on a muffled gasp, as your head tips backward.
You’re the most beautiful thing he’s ever seen.
He fucks his finger in and out slowly, adds a second to stretch you, and then he’s saying, “Baby, honey, you’re so tight, you’re so fucking wet, god I….”
You whimper, and then you’re pulling off him, shimmying out of your panties, leaning down to tug his boxers off.
“Gotta have…” Your throat moves when you swallow as you clamber back into his lap. “Want you inside me, please, Bradley. I’m ready.”
He groans, something in his stomach yanking tight, and he’s pretty sure he’s leaking precum steadily by now.
There’s no time to tease, no need for it either, not when you’re both aching for it, not after what you’ve just gone through. The hot slide of him inside you, feeling you all around him, Bradley thinks that might be the only thing that could make him realize he’s actually back here, that it isn’t all just a dream, that he didn’t actually go down in that plane and has been stuck in some kind of cruel limbo for the past few days.
But there’s the other thing too. The need he can’t explain. The selfish, horrible, depraved thing he can share with nobody but you. That nobody but you would ever understand.
Slowly, tentatively, he places his palm on your stomach, fingers splaying wide, and leaves it there. He’s too scared to look at you, too scared of what you’ll think of him, too scared of what you’ll do once you find out how deep his desire runs, how desperately he wants this. Will you hate him? Will you be disgusted? Will you draw back, pull away, leave him alone with all his depravity and all his fears and all his sorrow? 
“I need… I want…” He can’t even finish the sentence, brain too foggy. Too scared to meet your eyes, Bradley just blinks at the sight in front of him, his big hand on your skin, and his heart seizes, his insides clench, and he can’t breathe, can’t, he’s going to…
Slowly, your fingers wrap around his wrist.
“Yes,” you breathe above him.
It’s a visceral thing. The words burn through him, wrap around him, curl into him. He surges forward to kiss you, desperate, a choked sound escaping him, and licks into your mouth. Around his wrist, your fingers tighten.
He pushes you back into the sheets, crawls over you and spreads your legs, slides between them where he belongs. When his gaze falls to your face, there’s so much trust there, so much love, and it cleaves him in two, just how much he loves you, just how much he needs you. He doesn’t have the words to express it, can only hope you understand what he means when he plunges into you without preamble, when he whispers your name against the shell of your ear, when he curves around you like he wants to shield you from everything bad in the world.
You moan, fingers coming up to grasp his arm where he’s balancing his weight on the elbows. Your mouth tips open, your eyes not straying from his for a second as he goes slow, as he goes deep, as he goes home. There’s an answer in that too.
“You’re so beautiful,” he says, voice choked as he bottoms out, as he holds himself perfectly still. “So tight and beautiful, and you’re all mine, and I’m yours and….”
“Bradley,” you stop him. Wrap your legs around his hips and pull him in. “It’s okay. You can move now.”
So he does.
It’s frantic from the first moment. It’s all the tension that’s been building up for years and years inside of him, all his love and all his longing finally laid open, and he can’t hold back anymore, not when he feels like he’s going to burst out of his own skin at any moment now.
The wet squeeze of your walls around his cock has his eyes rolling into the back of his head.
“Fuck,” he curses, hips pushing forward at an unsteady pace, as he leans down to kiss you again, as you open your mouth for him easily, as he nips at your lower lip.
And it’s so dumb - he’s inside of you, curled around you, his tongue tangled with your own, but Bradley wants you closer, still. Needs to know that you’re there with him, that he’s here with you, that he came home and he is letting himself have this, you’re letting him have it, and he loves you, he loves you, he…
Bradley takes his weight off his elbows, gets his arms around you, plasters himself to you, chest to chest, hip to hip, mouth finding the side of your neck, your collarbones. Like this, with his arms around your shoulders, it feels almost like he’s pulling you down to him with every thrust, like he slides just half an inch deeper into you.
You try to muffle a moan into his hair, but Bradley pulls your face away, keeps his pace as he says, “Wanna hear you. Let me hear you, baby, tell me how much you like it. You love it, don’t you? Love my cock, yeah? Love it when I fuck you?”
Maybe it’s pathetic, but Bradley needs to hear it. Needs to know you’re as desperate for him as he is for you. Needs to know you want it just as much.
On a thrust in, your walls flutter around him, and you whine, back arching a little, head sliding across the pillow as you nod.
“Yes,” you gasp, “I love it, Bradley, I love your cock. Thought about it while you were gone all the time, every night, I….”
Bradley groans, shudders, suddenly so close to the brink he needs to squeeze his eyes shut against the image of you - the glossy eyes, the swollen lips, the absolute ruin he’s reduced you to.
“Can’t say shit like that, baby,” he whispers, leaning to press tender kisses to the column of your throat. “Not when you’re this fucking wet, not when you’re making these sounds… you’re gonna make me cum.”
You giggle, then moan, head lolling to the side to give him better access. 
“Good,” you say, legs hiking higher up on his hips, his cock sliding deeper, “that’s the plan, isn’t it?”
If there were any air left in his lungs, Bradley would laugh with you. As it stands, he just ups the ante, going a little harder, watching as your eyelashes flutter, feeling your fingers spasm against the skin of his back.
It’s so hot in the room, both of you sticking to each other with sweat, and maybe that, too, should be disgusting, but Bradley doesn’t care. When he leans down to lick a long, wet stripe along the edge of your jaw, he tastes salt on his tongue.
“I’m gonna….” When he glances down at you, at the eyes wide with that much trust, as he realizes you would let him do just about anything to you, that you’ve both opened yourself to each other completely now, no barriers and no ghosts standing between you, it’s like a dam breaking. He moans, so loud it echoes through the room, leans to plunge his tongue into your mouth, desperate, and then he’s saying into it, “God, I’m gonna fuck you so full, honey, gonna fuck you until it takes, yeah? Gonna keep you right here and fill you up, again and again, gonna make sure to get a baby in you, fuck, you’d be so fucking pretty, honey, so pretty all full of me, I know it, I can….”
And you sob. Full-on. Back arching off the bed, legs sliding off his hips, spreading so wide it must hurt.
“Bradley,” you say, fingernails breaking skin, forehead pressing against his throat to hide your face. “Bradley, fuck, I… the pill….”
He’s shaking his head, cutting you off with his mouth on yours. Conveying what he can’t speak, what he’s too far gone to formulate, here where logic has become a distant, remote concept, here between your legs. Don’t say it. Let me live in this fantasy. Let me dream a little longer.
It’s the thought of it all - a bump beneath your dresses, a baby in your arms, tiny fingers wrapping around his thumb, it’s about the long, long stretch of life ahead of the two of you. It’s about a house filled with love and free of ghosts. It’s about the first glimpse of the ocean after listening to its roar in seashells all his life. It’s about giving himself over to you completely, after years of only dreaming of it.
Do you know? he wonders. Do you know that you’re holding his whole life in your hands?
“I love you,” he mumbles, repeats it as he sinks into you again and again, as he buries himself in you, as he holds onto you like he’ll be back in the cold, cold, cold of all that snow the moment he lets go, like he’ll go back to the cockpit with the ghosts like jailors around him, like he’ll float right off the face off the earth. You have always been his anchor. “I’m gonna give you a baby, honey, I promise, gonna cum inside of you, you want that, right? You want me to come right here in this pretty pussy, fill you up all nice and wet, and….”
Your mouth moves against his clavicle, the feel of it spreading like wildfire through him, and you’re saying, “Yes, yes, Bradley, give it to me, please, I wanna feel it, want you to come inside me, please, please, I need it, I….”
A yell punches from him as he thrusts inside one last time, buries himself to the hilt in your warmth, and then he’s panting, his ears are ringing, his veins are buzzing as he cums, as he paints you with his release. He can’t do anything except hold onto you, bury his face in your hair, inhaling your scent, jerking his hips forward erratically, little sounds escaping him. It’s never felt like this before - like dying and coming back alive. The release of it is so big he feels shattered under its weight. 
And you’re saying something to him, whispering words sticky with honey into his ear, pouring them right into his heart, and he can barely hear you over the hammering of his own heart, but it doesn’t matter. You hold him as he trembles, as he shakes, as he tries to collect himself, to control his breathing, hold him and stroke lazy, soft circles up and down his back, trace patterns against his spine, leave soft kisses on any inch of skin you can reach, trapped beneath his weight as you are.
Finally, after an eternity, Bradley pulls away an inch or two, careful not to let his cock slip out. There’s a little embarrassment spreading through his stomach now because he can’t believe he came that fast, can’t believe he didn’t even make sure to take you over the edge with him.
But you barely seem to think about your own lack of an orgasm.
“Are you okay?” you ask, voice gentle, face full of concern.
Bradley’s heart clenches. Maybe, he thinks, his ribcage is going to crack open. It seems impossible for one person to hold so much love inside.
“Are…” He clears his throat, suddenly unsure. “Are you?”
You nod immediately, smile, and the relief floods him. Then you shift, gasp, muscles fluttering around his softening cock.
“Well… I…”
He doesn’t let you finish, shakes his head, says, “You did so good for me, baby. Let me take care of you, yeah?”
He’s already looking at the place where you’re still connected, where his cum is beginning to drip from you in silvery trails. The sight of it is enough to make something like madness descend again, something like that earlier haze, the frenzy of the heat.
Bradley pulls out, sighs at the feeling, and your mouth opens as if in protest, but before you can form any words, he’s replaced his cock with two fingers.
You whimper, eyes closing, a muscle in your stomach jumping.
“I got you,” he says, keeps his eyes on the mess of your swollen cunt, the wet spot soaking into the mattress just beneath, the evidence of his pleasure, smooths his free hand over your chest to settle you. “Relax, honey. I got you.”
Your answer is a moan of his name, fingers twisting into the sheets. He can feel your walls bearing down on the motion of his fingers and knows you’re close, desperately, frantically, torturously close to the brink.
So he speeds up the movement of his digits, swipes his thumb through the sopping wetness, and then across your clit as he fucks his cum back into you. Not letting a single drop go to waste.
“Bradley,” you sob, mouth opening, fingers grappling for something.
Knowing what you need, knowing without you asking for it, he catches your hand with his own and interlaces your fingers. Then he leans down, leans over you, leans in. Finds the seam of your mouth with his own. It’s less of a kiss than both of you panting against each other, finding the same rhythm.
“You can let go now,” he whispers into you. “I’m here. I’ve got you, honey. My perfect girl.”
You come with his name on your lips, cunt clenching around his fingers, arching off the bed and into him, and it’s like a prayer. It’s like a song. 
It takes you a while to come down, and he coaxes you through it, brushes kisses against your lips and your jaw and your ear. Hopes he can ground you the same way you ground him.
Finally, softly, voice faint and fragile, you say, “That was… intense.”
Bradley hums in agreement, and then a laugh rips from him. Because it’s all so ridiculous and so monumental, and he doesn’t know where to go with all these emotions.
“I… yeah. It really was.” He pauses, feels shame curling through him. “I’m sorry I sprung that on you.”
You shake your head, lift one hand to run a finger across his mustache the way you like to do sometimes. 
“It’s okay,” you say, and he knows you mean it. “You must have carried that for a long time.”
It chokes him up, the way you know him so well. Better than anybody else.
“Yeah,” he agrees, drops his head into the crook of your neck. “It… I want you to know that I really want this. It’s not… it’s not adrenaline, and it’s not just almost dying, it’s… It’s you. I want this with you. Only with you.”
He can feel the curve of your smile against his temple, can hear it in your voice.
“I want it with you too, Bradley. Only with you.”
Bradley’s so afraid he’s going to start crying again that he springs into action instead. Reaches around you for a pillow to push beneath your hips, angle your lower body upwards.
“What are you doing?” you ask, laughing a little.
“I’m trying to keep my cum in you. Maybe we’re like super extra lucky, and it works out on the first try.”
Now you’re laughing in earnest, and he gets the impression it might be at his expanse.
“Still on the pill, Bradley,” you remind him, eyes luminous with your happiness.
Feeling a little sheepish, a little embarrassed, a little elated, he shrugs helplessly.
“Can’t hurt,” he says. Then adds, “Besides… I don’t want all my hard work to go to waste.”
Then you’re laughing together, breathless, loud laughter, the bending-at-the-waist kind. The belly-hurting kind. The kind that doesn’t come often.
And it’s good. It’s beautiful. It’s the kind of peace he’s never known before but has wanted always, always, always.
It’s so much better than anything he could have ever dreamed. Because it’s real. Because it’s true.
All his life, Bradley thinks, he’s been listening to oceans in seashells. It’s good, fun even, for a while, but it’s no replacement for the real thing. It’s no comparison to standing at the shore of the Pacific Ocean, watching waves crest and crash and throw themselves against the beach again and again, like a devotion that never ends. How big and beautiful and terrible the truth of it is.
And he’d thought the whole world was in that seashell.
Once the laughter has died down, once you’ve fallen back into the kind of comfortable silence that can exist only between people that really, truly love each other, Bradley strokes his thumb against your cheekbone, watches your eyes flutter closed.
“I love you,” he says, “more than I thought I could love someone. Thanks for loving me back.”
It’s bumbling, and it’s inadequate, and it doesn’t convey half of what it should.
But you smile at him, eyes opening, face so tender his heart stutters, and you whisper, “It’s an honor, Lieutenant Bradshaw.”
For the first time, Bradley doesn’t think about dying, doesn’t think about leaving. He thinks about living. He thinks about staying.
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sp1rit-realm · 9 months
Text
༻¨*:· 𝐓𝐇𝐄 𝐋𝐈𝐅𝐓 ·:*¨༺
༻¨*:· summary ·:*¨༺ you hate remus lupin, and he hates you. what happens when you get stuck in a lift together?
༻¨*:· notes ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 hour two!!!!! 𖦹 enemies to ?? 𖦹 forced proximity 𖦹 fem!reader 𖦹 i did not proofread this bc i'm lazy ⎝(ˊᗜˋ)⎠
༻¨*:· word count ·:*¨༺ 𖦹 746
prologue / hour 1 << pt 3. -- hour 2 >> hour 3
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༻¨*:· 𝐇𝐎𝐔𝐑 𝟐 ·:*¨༺
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You and Remus haven't spoken in thirty-seven minutes and twenty-eight seconds—not that you're counting.
"Who cares if I was whining?"
It startles you, "I do! If you're going to say I'm acting like a child, at least take accountability and say you're acting like one too."
"So you admit you were acting childish." He crosses his arms.
You scoff, "Oh, you are such a—" You stop yourself, biting your tongue.
"I'm such a what?" He taunts with a smirk like he knows he's won this battle.
But you're not ready to admit defeat, "You are such a petty asshole!"
"I'm petty? Me?" He puts his finger to his chest so hard it hurts him.
"Yes! Yes, you are! You didn't show up to my birthday, Remus! At least I got you a present for yours!"
Remus throws his head back and lets out a groan from deep within himself, "Really?! You're going to bring up your stupid birthday again?! Bringing it up is petty. You know that, right?"
"No, it's not!" You argue, "It's bringing up something that hurt me! And something you never apologized for, by the way." You cross your arms, close to stomping your foot like a child.
Remus rolls his eyes, "I had plans! You want me to apologize for having plans?!"
"You never even got me a gift! Not even a card!"
"Listen very closely," He speaks slowly, boring holes into your eyes—scorching your retinas, "You and I are not friends. We do not like one another. I threw your gift away. Okay?"
It hurts you, "You threw it away?" 
"I don't like you! Why would I want something that reminds me of you?"
You look at the floor, willing tears to stay in your eyes. You will not let him see how much it hurts you, "See? Petty asshole." You say through gritted teeth.
"Fine. Believe what you want."
"Hello?" The same voice crackles through the speaker.
"Hello," You greet.
"Um," They pause, "Maintenance crew should be there in about five hours."
You're going to pry the doors open and kill yourself, you think.
"Okay. Thank you." You squeeze out before letting go of the button and screaming.
Remus's eyes go wide, and he flinches, "Upset?"
"What do you think, dick?"
He puts his hands up in surrender.
. • ☆ . ° .• °:. *₊ ° . ☆
Minutes pass before either of you speak. Remus is the one to break the silence.
"So... we're gonna be here for at least five hours."
Your eye twitches, "Wow, we've got a detective over here!" You turn to him, "Maybe they weren't lying when they said you were smart." Saccharine sarcasm drips from your tongue.
"Oh, shut up!" He lashes back, "Get off your high fucking horse!"
"You're irrelevant to me," You say, staring straight.
"You're so damn childish!"
"Shut up! Shut! Up!" You stomp your foot on the ground like a little kid who's not allowed any ice cream.
"This is gonna be fun," He mutters—it doesn't go unheard.
"Sorry, did you say something?"
"I did," He crosses his arms, "I said: 'This is going to be fun.' In case you're too dense to tell, I was being sarcastic," He says the word slowly, talking down to you. It only fuels the fire more.
"I swear to every god you believe in, I will shriek so loud it pierces your eardrums, and you go deaf!"
"Go ahead! If I go deaf, I'll never have to hear your stupid voice again, and I will cheer, and I will celebrate, and I will throw a party!" His face is red at the end of his rant, and you swear there's steam coming out of his ears.
Your smile is taunting, "That was quite amusing."
"Shut up!" He's growing restless, and it's only egging you on further.
"Oh, you want me to shut up?"
"I would love for you to shut up."
"Fine," You cross your arms, "Let's play the silent game. Whoever wins gets to slap the other person in the face."
"I'm not going to slap you."
You light up, "I guess you'll just have to let me win."
"Fine. But no slapping hard."
You light up and clench your fists in anticipation.
"Okay, no punches either," Remus says, glimpsing at your hands with a worried smile.
"Sorry!" You flex your hands out, "I'm just so excited!" You're smiling so hard your cheeks hurt.
'What a cute smile,' Remus thinks right before he gets slapped in the face—metaphorically and literally.
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