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humanitys-strongest-bamf · 6 months

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lmao idk if this is even any good but all i want is levi ackerman taking care of me during the times that my brain's being mean to me :(

Who You Are | Levi Ackerman Hurt/Comfort Oneshot

✧ word count ➼ 1.7k ✧ notes ➼ hurt/comfort, negative self-talk, levi being comforting in his levi way, explicit descriptions of depression (specifically the catatonia)

You could tell it was another one of those days.

You weren't surprised, but you sure were disappointed. You had gone to bed telling yourself that today would be better, that this recent episode had finally passed.

Your body felt heavy, like you could barely move. Even adjusting the blanket when you got too warm, and peeling your eyes open to check to time felt as effortful as dragging an oversized briefcase up the flight of stairs to your apartment when the elevator was down.

Now that you thought about it, you noted that the briefcase might actually be easier than this.

Not only did you feel heavy, but you also felt numb. You were barely present and you felt like the world was passing by around you, as if you were an outsider simply watching. You could likely receive devastating news and not feel a single thing.

You couldn't get yourself to cry. Oh how you wished that you could finally cry.

Getting up was impossible. You felt like your bladder was going to explode. The bathroom was only a few steps away—but you couldn't get yourself to move.

You were miserable. Getting up was miserable. Lying in bed was miserable. Falling asleep was miserable. Everything was just miserable.

Things had been getting better for a while. You would convince yourself that it was over, that you had finally 'beaten' your depression, that you were on the right meds, doing the right things, taking care of yourself, and practicing all of your therapy skills.

Then out of nowhere, it'd hit like a truck. The monster known as depression would engulf you in the blink of an eye, and you'd find yourself suddenly confined to the four walls of your bedroom, wrapped inside your blanket as if you were in a cocoon, begging to yourself and counting down the seconds until the depressive episode passed.

Sometimes it did. Other times it didn't.

You peaked one eye out of the blanket as you heard the door to the bedroom open, watching as your boyfriend sat down next to you.

"Rough day?" Levi's voice was gentle and quiet. He had seen you like this for the past few days, so he wasn't all that surprised when he came home and noticed that you were still in bed.

You buried your face into the blanket, ashamed to tell him that you've yet to actually get up even though it was late into the afternoon.

Levi's eyes scanned your body, noticing that your hair was still messy, and that you were still wearing the clothes that you had gone to sleep in the previous night. His gaze wandered towards your nightstand, seeing that the water he had left out for you that morning was untouched, which likely meant that you couldn't get yourself to take your meds for the day.

His eyes furrowed together with concern. Although he wanted to, he knew that asking you about if you had taken your meds or grabbed a bite to eat was just going to make you feel worse.

"Wanna go on a drive with me?" he finally spoke up, gently lowering the blanket away from your face so he could see you better. "Gotta pick something up from the office."

You remained silent as he cupped your cheek with his hand, gently running his thumb across your cheek.

You did usually enjoy your drives with him, even if it didn't feel like it right now.

"You don't even have to change. Take the blanket with you if you wanna keep being a burrito."

You saw the edge of his lips slightly tug up as he playfully commented on your cocoon. If you were feeling better, you'd chuckle with him, but you instead just stuck your bottom lip out in a small pout.

Still, a pouty look in your eyes was better than an empty one. That counted as progress.

"...it'll get dirty," you finally spoke up, your voice hoarse from the fact that you hadn't had a drink of water since the night before.

"We have other blankets," Levi reasoned. "Take the fucking blanket."

~~~~~

You compromised and brought the throwover blanket from the couch with you instead. You were surprised that you had the energy to make the swap instead of just dragging yourself out with the duvet that had been providing you shelter for a few days straight.

Levi had said he needed something from his office, but you knew he was lying. It was likely that whatever he needed to grab wasn't actually that important and could've waited until after the weekend. You knew he was already busy enough as is, which only resulted in you feeling terrible about the fact that he was putting in extra time and effort to attempt to help you feel better.

You sat in comfortable silence as he drove, with you snuggled up in the blanket on the passenger's seat. Your chair was reclined enough so that you were leaning backwards, but were still sitting. The gentle hum of the car helped provide some comfort, although it was barely noticeable.

You eventually looked over at him as he pulled to a stop. You were now at the drive-thru at the local cafe. You listened passively as Levi ordered himself a fresh cup of Earl Grey, shaking your head when he glanced over at you to see if you wanted something.

Levi placed his tea in his cupholder and then placed a small cup of yogurt in yours, indicating that it was there for you if you could get yourself to eat without making you feel too pressured if you couldn't.

When the car came to a stop again, you sighed. He had driven the two of you to the park where you first met and a slight hint of light appeared in your eyes as you were able to pull up the happy memory despite the depressive funk you currently found yourself in.

The back windows of the car were cracked open to let in some fresh air. While you had a brief moment of respite upon seeing that you were at the park, the thoughts of inadequacy quickly returned, swirling in your head like a storm that refused to let up.

Levi looked over at you, his eyebrows furrowing in confusion once he heard you mumble an apology.

"For what?"

Your voice was barely audible and you weren't even looking at him as you spoke. He vaguely heard you say something about being useless.

Noticing that he wasn't responding, you looked up at him, seeing a look in his eyes that resembled one of exasperation, but not quite so. The expression communicated that while he wasn't expecting the comment at this moment, he wasn't surprised by it either.

"Is that you," he began, poking at your forehead, "or that little voice in your head talking?"

Your lips downturned into a pout, both at his question and the way that he was reacting. You knew that he was being gentler since he knew that you weren't in the headspace for his usual commentary. While Levi Ackerman was not one to sugarcoat and say things for the sake of appearing affectionate alone, he also wasn't a dick. He wasn't going to put more distress on you when you already felt like you were drowning.

"You're not useless," he eventually said with a sigh. "I know that feels like a wild concept right now, so you don't have to believe it—but you're here."

He gestured towards your body, including the blanket that was wrapped around you.

"You dragged your ass out of bed and into this car despite feeling like shit," he continued, "and don't start with saying that I forced you because I didn't. You did that on your own."

The little things counted, even if it really was just moving from laying down in bed to sitting in the passenger seat of Levi's car.

"...'m sorry for being a burden," you whispered.

"You're not," Levi interjected, barely allowing you to finish your sentence. "Even if you were, I love you for who you are, not just what you can do or accomplish."

He leaned forward once he noticed that you weren't responding and grabbed onto your hand, gently shaking you to get your attention.

"Hey, look at me," he commanded, his tone of voice a bit more firm.

He gestured towards the blanket and the fact that you were wrapped up in it.

"This does not define who you are. It's a part of you, and we've accepted that," he said before poking at your forehead again, "but it doesn't change who you are."

You felt your eyes begin to heat up as he spoke the words that you needed to hear—that you were more than just your depression, and that no matter how much your depression was weighing you down right now, that he still, and always will, see you as the same person that he fell in love with all those years ago.

The tears threatening to gather in your eyes was a sign of progress. At least you were feeling something now.

Noticing that his words had struck a chord within you, he pulled you into him, placing his hand on the back of your head as you buried your face into the nape of his neck, giving you the space to simply exist and process those emotions you were finally able to get yourself to feel again.

Depression was a bitch to live with. The moment you were told that this could be something you'd always have to deal with from time to time, and that it's hard to say if it'll ever truly go away—you were mortified. The idea of having to do this randomly, with there being nothing you could do to stop it made you want to cry and give up—but Levi was always there to pick you back up.

Although you were still the one that had to drag yourself up, Levi kept you from falling further into the trenches. Unlike everyone else that either looked at you with pity or continued to mutter empty phrases like "it'll pass" or "you'll get better", Levi just accepted you for who you were—because as he said, whether you lived with depression or not, he would always love you for who you were.

#: @chaotic-on-main @romantichomicide95 @levisbrat25 @leviismybby @moonmalice @averysmolbear @cathybarn @tclbts @emiwhore @bejewelledd @sad-darksoul @ackermendick @aomi04 @apolloshaiku @laraackerman @pulpolicia @raenacreates @nube55 @roseofdarknessblog @saenora @noctemys @sixpennydame @grav3bab3 @heichoucleanfreak @svftackerman @catskze @nixie-writes-aot @la-undercover-latina @v4mp-wife @darkstarlight82 @professorweezy @braunsbabe @lovedbylevi @levis-squishy-cheeks @dumbfound-princess @deepzombieyouth @evas-leslas join my taglist!

#levi x reader #levi ackerman x reader #levi heichou x reader #captain levi x reader #levi fluff #levi #levi ackerman #levi heichou #captain levi #attack on titan #aot #shingeki no kyojin #shingeki no kyoujin #snk

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oursecretways · 16 days

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Is this what you call self-care?

Felix × Reader notes: I am at the point where I feel like playing 72 hours of Stardew Valley is perfectly reasonable, so I hope u enjoy my first fanfic. Also, idk about you, but I feel like he would def enjoy some Zelda 😌… also, this isn't the longest fic out there, but it is a short story after all. Enjoy!☻ word count: 1,795 warning(s): light cursing Just a chill day with Felix, while you’re trying to make progress with your uni work

It was a regular Saturday for you, waking up at 6 AM and feeling your boyfriend's arm around you. After you turn your alarm off, you turn to look at him, smiling. His long, blond hair fell into his angelic face. It is so hard to not say fuck it and stay in bed with Felix, but you—with the smallest of movements to not wake him—get out of bed, making your way to the bathroom to get ready. After you get yourself into some comfy stay-at-home-and-study clothes, you brew yourself a cup of coffee with some coconut milk.

You've been researching for your midterm paper for a while now. It wasn't the worst topic, but selecting what's important and what isn't is where you were hopeless.

After restarting it for the hundredth time, you heard movements from your bedroom. You peeked out of the study/gaming room to see Felix's tired face, which filled your heart with warmth. "Good morning, love. How did you sleep?" He looked back at you while he grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge. "I slept well until some gremlin left from next to me way too early this morning." A smile crept up his face, reaching out for your hand so he could pull you in for a hug. He kept you close with one hand, resting his face on your head while you hid in the crook of his neck. His sweet scent filling your nose. "How's your university work going?" you scrunch your face, not even wanting to think about the research and writing your essay. "Well, I read a lot, but I do not know where to begin or what things are the necessities to put into my paper." You felt yourself wanting to throw a tantrum like the 5-year-old who you are at heart. He kissed your forehead, then put his pinky out. "Okay, I have a trade offer; once you're halfway done, we can play on our farm together." Your eyes lit up. You've been pretty hooked on Stardew Valley for a while now, especially since the new update, and you got Felix to play with you on his days off. Sadly, they've been pretty busy with their comeback, so you couldn't hang out as much. He usually got home by the time you were asleep, and you went to class or to the library to learn before he woke up, since it was soon time for your final exams. You only have one year back from your university, and you don't want setbacks, so it is important to get a good grade. Your parents would be pleased as well since you flew to another city to learn specifically there, so you want to make them proud. You link your pinkies together to form an unbreakable promise. "Okay, but no distractions! If you want to play, please play in the living room; we both know I won't ever finish my assignment with you distracting me." He chuckles and nods his head in agreement. You happily made yourself another cup of coffee, then went back to the study to work on your task. You still cannot believe it that you somehow snagged such a perfect man: he is supportive, understands your concerns, and can always accept your compromises. He openly talks to you about how he feels and bravely tells you if something bothers or concerns him. You honestly can't believe these past couple years have been real.

You've made a bit of progress; it helped that you talked with your old dorm roommates—you moved in with Felix about half a year now; you two realized that it would be the easiest since you went over any given chance anyways. They gave some good suggestions. Once you caught up with each other, you four said your goodbyes, since all of you have a lot of work to get done by the end of this month. After some time, you smelled a sweet scent coming from the kitchen. The door opened before you could sneak out to have a peek. Felix brought in your favorite cookies; it was a mixture of his classic chocolate chip and your oatmeal cookies recipe. You two perfected it while he got some time off, and you didn't have school just yet. His brown eyes looked at you proudly behind the plate of cookies with milk in his other hand. "How's your progress, baby?" He bent down to give you a peck on the lips. You waited until he put the plate and the cup down, then patted the ground next to you, signaling for him to sit down. He didn't waste any seconds, and plopped right next to you, happy that he could sit beside his girlfriend. Felix didn't want to make you feel pressured; he just wants to spend as much time as possible with you before he has to go back to endless dance practice, content creation, etcetera. You both know he loves doing what he does, but it can get overwhelming sometimes. They got cussed out a lot for the smallest of things, getting bullied and going as far as getting death treats. He was grateful for being able to work his dream job, and he is also happy that you understand what this kind of life comes with.

Felix watched you type your thoughts out in your document and started to play with your hair, which made you relax instantly. You couldn't help but melt into his touch. You leaned onto his shoulder, feeling exhausted. "I am almost done with half of my assignment; I just need another page, but I feel like my brain cells are giving up on me." He chuckled, placing a kiss on your head. "You got this; I believe in you." He started giving kisses all around your face, which soothed your tired thoughts. Felix eventually kissed your lips; the kiss was sweet and made you feel like you're under the sun at the beginning of the spring. You reciprocated immediately, feeling as though time had stopped—no tasks, no school, no pressure—just you and him tangled together in a complete state of Nirvana. Before it could get heated, Lixie pulled away, holding you firmly, so he kept up his strenght to not distract you further. "Is it okay if I play Zelda while I lay in your lap?" You saw a hint of pink on his face, making you smile. "Well, I am close to finishing it, so why not? I don't think it can cause any harm." Felix got up excitedly to get his switch with his headphones. He laid down and got comfortable, then started playing his game. He has been quite into it lately. The game was beautiful, and there were a lot of things to do. The excitement in him got you into playing it, asking for his help in some harder situations.

When you got done with half of your paper, you looked down and saw a sleeping Felix with a gaming console on the ground next to him. He looked so peaceful like this: his pink lips parted, his eyelashes casting shadows on his face, and his freckles painting constellations onto his features. You can't help but start connecting the dots on his face with your fingers, making his eyes flutter as he awakens. "What are you doing, gorgeous?" You lean down to kiss him as a response. You feel like you're going to explode with all the feelings inside your chest. "I am done with half of my paper; I didn't want to wake you, sorry." You pout just a little, earning a smile as he reaches for your face to caress it. "That's my good girl. Are you ready for some farming time?" You nod, knowing that you're going to end up either playing until the sun gets up again or none at all and will end up cuddling in bed.

You two made some lunch and plopped down besides each other. Your desks have been set against one another, his PC taking up one desk while yours is cluttered by notes and books for your university courses; you just keep pushing it back each time you take your laptop out instead of organizing it. Felix tried to reason with you or help with that mess, but that's how you were, looking unorganized yet knowing exactly what is where, always on point. That's what your grades always reflect: perfect or almost perfect scores, even though you procrastinate until the last minute. He smiled to himself, knowing how he and the boys wished they had this superpower.

You put on your two's favorite chill playlist and booted up the game. We made a lot of progress, stopping to occasionally show physical affection for each other or taking a quick bathroom or snack break. I didn't even notice how the time flied until you looked down on your watch, seeing that it had passed five a.m. "Yongbok, we have a problem. Have you checked the time?" He has been so into the game that he almost looked up into the corner to see the in-game time, realizing that this might become a problem in the future. "Oh shit, I didn't notice when it got this late. I mean, I am going to be okay; I won't work for a couple of days now, but when do you need to send this assignment in?" he asked, knowing damn well that you have a habit of sending in your tasks with one minute left on the clock, giving him a scare. One time, Chan got to see your study progress and felt his soul leave his body. He still remembers how he and Han watched how their leader scolded you about your academics and your attitude towards your learning, painting a picture of an overworked father lecturing his rebellious daughter, who—no matter what she's doing—will always be his treasure. It never got said out loud, but you became the younger sister of the group, with all the older members looking out for your happiness and safety. And Felix isn't sure that if you two ever break up—which, let's face it, is highly unlikely—he wouldn't get the shorter stick and wouldn't get scolded.

Once you two saved and logged off for the day, got ready for bed, you snuggled close to each other leaving sweet kisses on one another, fighting the strong urge to sleep. When he heard your breathing change, he knew that you were fast asleep, what he waited for all along. It makes him happy and calm, knowing you are asleep. He pressed a light kiss on your forehead.

"Good night, my love," and with that, he dozed off to sleep as well.

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pedrostylez · 11 months

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Working Hard

Summary: Frankie always wants you to be outside with him when he takes care of your yard. That's it Very little editing done so like just...move past that okay

Rating: 18+ please control your experience on this platform

Word Count: 1.6k words

Warnings: fingering, dirty talk, praise kink, semi public? idk sorta, struggle of who is in charge but very light/minor, mostly just written with the intent of smut

Curling your fingers through Frankie’s hair, twisting around your index and tickling between your two fingers. Chocolatey locks to match the gaze, slowly drooping to half lid and then fully closed. Eyelashes resting against his cheeks, speckled with sun spots and freckles alike, warm from the day in the sun. Your fingers were cool from being wrapped around your drink, brushing his scalp and calming his skin from the work in the yard.

He loved having you outside with him while he cut the grass, weeded the plants, making your yard pristine. He preferred you close, once teasing you to sit on his lap while he drove the lawn mower around, but settled for you in the lounge chair with a fruity drink and little clothing.

When he was done he liked to block your sun, waiting until you would notice and slide your sunglasses down your nose to glare at him for a beat. Once your eyes would lock on his he would lean down to give you a kiss, rubbing his nose against yours first and then sitting beside your chair so he could lay his head on your bare thighs. Sometimes, he would take a sip of your drink, asking if you were enjoying yourself watching him work away. You always quirked your lips at him, cheeks growing red in the way he liked and sheepishly admitting you did like to watch him work.

Today was no different, his head resting on your upper thigh after mowing the tall grass. It had rained for the past couple weeks and he hadn’t been able to take care of it, and now he laid there with grass flecked over his neck and face. He had mowed a patch specifically for your chair first, setting it up in the sun and smiling at you when you stepped out on the back patio to look at his progress. “Come on then, sugar.” He had said, winking at you before pulling his hat down tighter and continuing his work.

Now, he opened his eyes against the sun to look up at you, covering his view with his arm briefly before drifting his fingers up your bare side to tickle you. “What you reading there today?”

You paused your minstrations in his sweaty hair, moving your book to the side to look directly at him. You shrugged, tilting your head and giving him a small smile. “Picked it up from the library. Something about time travel.”

He hummed, turning his head back up towards the sun and closing his eyes again. You both were quiet, reading through a few more pages before feeling Frankie snake his hand up to your side again, pulling at the elastic of your swimsuit bottoms. With a quick snap of the fabric he chuckled, lifting his head and turning his whole body toward you. “I was going to shower all this grass off me. Are you coming?”

Without lifting your eyes, you turn another page. “You know, I like you a little dirty.” You mumble, watching from the corner of your eye him put his hands on his hips and smile.

“Oh really?” He questions, tapping his foot against the newly cut grass and looking around the yard.

You were secluded, with high fences and plenty of trees that Frankie had complained about when cleaning up the leaves or sticks. But suddenly he was thankful for them, with the idea that seemed to cross his face. You set your book down, dog-earring the page and shutting it to look at him. “What are you planning?”

Frankie gives you a quick shrug, looking up toward the sky to seemingly look for the answer to your question before a smile spread across his face. He stepped back toward you, hands reaching to his belt and quickly unbuttoning his pants, watching you slide your sunglasses up your forehead to rest on top of your head. “Pretty quiet out here, don’t you think?”

You give him a quick laugh, resting your hand on your leg as you watch him unzip his pants. He lifts his shirt slowly, watching for your reaction to tell him no. When you don’t he eagerly lifts it off and tosses it towards the patio steps. A small amount of hair is smattered across his chest that lead to just above his pants, making your subconsciously run your tongue across your bottom lip in anticipation. “Very quiet…and private.” You sigh, crossing your legs.

He tutts at you, hands lifting away from himself as he kneels down back next to you and running his fingers up your skin. “You’re bad.” Frankie’s fingers curl around the outside of your swimsuit, twisting around the tie and pulling slowly. “You want me to fuck you out here? All sweaty and covered in grass still?” He laughs incrediously, glancing up to your face.

The reality was that you had expressed to him early on that you didn’t mind his smell. Something that he had been shy about when you first would give him a kiss after working in the yard, exercising, or doing something that required sweat, but eventually gave way to lust. He had bent you over the counter after physical labor just the week before, but the idea of it out in the open intrigued you.

You nodded your head, biting your lip as he slipped your bikini bottoms from you and tossed them in the growing pile of clothing by the steps. “Please, Frankie?” You sighed, opening your legs without him asking.

He could feel his pants tightening, his fingers ghosting up your leg to cradle your heat briefly. You were dripping, his middle and ring finger wanting to slide into you as you arched your back. He wanted to shut his eyes and just feel you, let his fingers take control-but he couldn’t do that. He pulled away from you to shove his pants down to his knees, pulling you towards him on the edge of the chair. “Stay quiet, baby. Don’t want to have the neighbors looking.” He growled, pulling out his length and pumping it slowly.

You looked down to where his hand was wrapped around himself, leaning one hand back to support you and the other to touch his chest. The muscles in his arm were strained, tense under your touch as you moved it up to rest carefully around his neck. His breath caught in his throat at the feeling of your fingers beginning to squeeze. “You better stay quiet too, honey.” You sigh, tilting your hips down to feel the tip of him touch your entrance with each pull he gives.

He shut his eyes then, groaning out before looking down to his weeping head and sliding it up and down your center. “Fuck, come here baby.” Frankie slides in quickly, pausing once he has pushed in to the hilt to feel your fingers squeeze around his neck tighter, to hear your breath catch, to see your chest heave towards him. He smiles to himself, pulling out and pushing back in once. “Does that feel good?”

You nod, whimpering as he starts a slow rhythm with his hands wrapped around your legs pressing into your skin. The sound of his moan when you finally let go of his neck and scratch down the front of his chest has you smiling, watching his body move. You squeezed him inside you, making him stutter his thrusts.

Something about the way you could feel his legs shaking as you squeezed around him, the twinge of a shiver as you released your hold, the way his breath caught at your tightest. Frankie gives you a shallow thrust and pauses, silently asking you to squeeze him again. “Do you like that?” You breathe, hand sliding up his arm to dance over his neck and into his hair.

“Yes-fuck. Do it again.” He presses, sliding his hand under your shoulder to support you while you leaned back, flicking his tongue over your open mouth. “Love to feel you.”

You did as he asked, squeezing around his member as he moaned into your mouth at the feeling of it. He was mumbling out praises, picking up his pace again and squeezing your hips so tightly you were sure there would be bruises. “F-fuck–Frankie–”

“Shh you’re okay.” He mumbles against you, moving one hand up to your neck and bring your forehead to his. “Stay quiet honey. Fuck, you look so good like this.”

You bite the inside of your cheek to stop yourself from crying out, feeling pressure at the bottom of your spine and a heat begin to course through you. “Frankie, I’m going to come.”

He smiles at you, pushing forward faster and squeezing around your neck like you had done earlier. “You going to make a mess all over me, huh baby? Go ahead.” He moans out, covering your mouth with his as he hears you unable to control you sounds. He whispers to you, kissing you and breathing with you as you orgasm, his own approaching quickly.

He finishes soon after, pushing his body flush with yours and burying his face into the column of your neck. His forehead is damp with sweat, hot breath sticking to your skin as you both come down from your highs. He chuckles, kissing at your shoulder before lifting his head while softening inside you. “Would you want to shower now?” He asks, watching the smile spread across your face.

You shrug, giving him a light giggle. “I need one now, since you got grass all over me.” He laughs with you, sliding himself out of you and standing, offering his hand to you.

“So sorry honey.” He mocks an apology, stepping toward your patio steps to reach down for the pile of clothes. “Let’s get cleaned up.”

#pedro pascal #pedro pascal characters #pedro pascal fanfic #pedro pascal smut #pedro pascal fanfiction #frankie morales #frankie morales smut #frankie morales x reader #frankie catfish morales

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olderthannetfic · 5 months

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All the griping about #ownvoices claiming to represent diversity but really just forcing minority authors to write very particular ideas of what a "minority experience" is that please what publishers and "progressive" readers of majority groups want to see.... makes me feel like that movie American Fiction can't come out soon enough. I mean idk how much penetration that will have with the YA and genre publishing industries but. It floored me when I realized the novel it was based on was like 20 years old.... it just shows how while we might have a different publishing-industry label for it, black authors feeling like their books get ignored if they don't write for a particular (racist, tbh) fantasy of what the "black experience" looks like is an evergreen problem.

I know someone who's a tv writer, and they're always calling her up and using the word 'urban'. She's a dork. She should be writing for Gus from Psych or just any old show, not whatever it is they think she's going to be good at.

The real sticking point for a lot of white readers isn't a heavy book about issues: it's connecting with a trashy beach read about a Mary Sue who happens to be black. Or, for those of us who read trash m/m, asking us to have a black man as our single perfect tear woobie of choice.

I don't know why this is so hard for us. (I mean, racism, duh, but specifically why? It's all very well to blame the R word, but there are a million flavors, and unraveling stupidass underlying assumptions and bad behavior requires grasping what's going on more precisely.) I suppose it's a lifetime of training about otherness and who's allowed to be fragile and perceiving every single instance where the fairytale princess doesn't match our hair and eye color exactly—yes, even if she's white—as a demand that we never have personal wish fulfillment fantasies again. The atrociousness of a lot of media doesn't help, particularly for fanfic, but that's not the whole of it. A lot of people act like you ran over their cat if you ask them to identify with a sensitive, vulnerable black character in iddy trash fun.

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ch3rriewine · 2 years

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Made with love <3.

summary: you crochet remus a sweater after noticing his deminishing collection:)

warnings??: 1.3k words, fluff, fem!reader, crochet stuff, remus being a cutie, no use of y/n, they're in love we get it, young remus, the pace she finishes the sweater is a little unrealistic but eh, first fic bear with me here, ahhhhh idk dude lmk if im missing something

idk like authors note: this is inspired by @lonelyhe4rts imagine:D, go check it out its great! if they say they are uncomfortable with this i will take it down immediately. i just thought i'd make something similar idk also this is super old it's been sitting in my notes for a year. if there's any mistakes or something lmk!

╰── ⋅ ⋅ ── ✩ ── ⋅ ⋅ ──╯

Currently hard at work with a wooden hook in one hand and a quarter finished woolen square in the other, yarning over and pulling through as quickly as you can.

You are in the middle crocheting your lovely boyfriend a sweater. Sure, it was ambitious to finish a sweater a few days before you planed to give it to him, but you were dead set on making him this — Plus you had already finished the front panel. The yarn is a gorgeous tan shade you thought would suit his personality perfectly. Found it in a small crafts store whilst visiting your muggle relatives and knew you had to buy some. Granted it was impulsive and you had no current projects needing this specific color, but it reminded you of Remus, so it was only right for you to buy it.

A couple hours later, and many breaks from her hand cramping, you finally finished the back panel and was beginning the first sleeve when it struck you — the best idea ever. You had the brilliant idea of putting tiny heart at the end of the sleeve so only he’d be able to see it. Yup you were a genius, you decided. The heart would be a blush color so it would blend in just enough to see it if you looked directly at it while not being too vibrant. Once it was on the inside of the wrist area, he walked in. There he was with his shaggy brown hair that somehow always fell right, his tall lanky stature, and his terrible posture. He smiles wide as soon as he spots you in an old armchair in the corner of the common room. Immediately you hide the work in progress behind your back, wouldn’t want to ruin the surprise now would we?

It was too late unfortunately, he has seen you with yarn and a hook in your hands and was immediately curious as to what you were making. He has always been a fan of the small bags or beanies you managed to weave up, so he wanted to know what this one was and why you hid it behind your back.

Striding over with furrowed eyebrows he asks

“Hey, what were you working on if you don’t mind me asking?” He plops down on the armchair beside yours.

“I do mind you asking actually” you reply with a slightly humored tone.

“Oh come on! I love your projects, please!” he drags out the end “Just let me see” He pleads now leaning over the small end table separating the 2 chairs, grabbing at your arm softly.

“No! I’m not gonna show you until it’s done!” You pull back your arm, crossing them and looking back at him with fake frustration.

“Please” He pleads “I’ll give you my love if you tell me”

“Hard pass” you say blankly, looking away to pretend to read some book left nearby.

Just as he was about to plead again, James, Sirius, and Peter walk in calling his name, looking to drag him into another one of their silly ideas. James spots him and makes his way over quickly. Before he gets another word out, he gets dragged by James excitedly. Finally, some peace in here. As soon as he’s out of sight, you get back to work. After maybe another hour or so, you turn in for the night. With a cramping hand and a bundle of woven scraps in your hand you walk into your dorm, crashing onto your bed. You’re alone for maybe 10 minutes before your boyfriend finds you and takes you into his arms.

“You gonna tell me what you were making now?” He asks playfully.

“Shhh stay quiet pretty boy, I’m tired” you mumble into his chest.

“Alright fine" he tucks your hair aside "But only because you’re tired” he sighs dramatically before burying his head into your hair.

Next morning he invites you to watch Sirius eat some weird candy they found, but you decline to finish the sweater, and you do. With a rested mind and a no longer cramped hand you were back at it again, crocheting peacefully with Remus in mind to motivate you. Doing the last stitch which hides the last yarn end, you hold it up to look at it in whole. A stranger would know it was handmade, but it was still done well enough to think it’d be stocked in a small store that sold that kind of thing. Smiling, you go to wrap it.

You fold the sweater neatly in a box along with a couple of his favorite chocolates. Maybe it was overkill since it wasn’t even Christmas, but who can blame you? You were excited and he deserved it. Wrapping the box in a simple sparkly pink wrapping paper you had lying around and tying a nice white bow on it, you write a nice card to tuck in the bow.

With the gift neatly enough wrapped, you sneak into his dorm to find his bed. There, you set down the box and smile. You hope he likes it, wait no, he better like it. Walking back to your dorm you see, who other than the Marauders walking to back to their dorm. You smile to yourself and speed walk back to your own dorm.

Maybe 5 minutes pass before you get a certain brunette boy knocking at your door. Opening it with a smile you see him holding the opened box with a matching smile on his gorgeous face.

“Was this you?” He asks despite knowing the answer.

“Hmm I dunno, do you know any girls who crochet you things?” You tease lightly.

He matches your grin "Maybe"

“Well who’s this lucky gal?” You try to suppress your smile now, but failing quite miserably.

“Some pretty girl right in front of me” His cheeks tinted pink now.

“Well do you like it?” You drop the bit, now slightly insecure.

“Like? It’s my prize possession now! I mean you made me this? I know why you wouldn’t tell me what you were making now!” He rambles slightly letting himself into your empty dorm.

“If you love it so much try it on!” He hurriedly pulls off his current sweater and pulls yours from the box and pulling it on himself. He adjusts, feeling the material before putting his hands on his hips, posing for you. You giggle, and he swears he’ll do that a million times just to hear it again.

“Fits perfectly” you say walking towards him to examine it on him.

“Of course it does, you made it how could it have any flaws” he flirts. Rolling your eyes you pick up your polaroid camera to snap a shot of him in your, first of many, sweater. He sees this, smiles, fixes his hair till he catches a glimpse of blush yarn and looks at his sleeve again with adoration at the tiny heart. Then there’s a flash in front of him. He turns back to you grinning and pulling out the photo. Waving it a bit to develop faster, you look at the photo. It’s a perfect shot, so genuine. It’s him looking at the small heart with slightly furrowed brows, a small smile on his face, adoration in his eyes, and pink dusting cheeks. He walks over to look at it too.

“You’re so handsome” You say dragging out the last syllable, teasing lightly when he grabs it from you to look at it. Looking at it he smiles fully now and places it down on the closest desk. Pulling you into a hug he mumbles into your hair.

“Thank you so much, dove. I love it, it’s the best thing I’ve ever gotten.” Your cheeks become hot and you bury your head into his chest further.

“I’m just glad you like it.” You smile into his chest.

#remus lupin fluff #remus lupin x reader #remus lupin #marauders #marauders fluff #remus lupin fic #young remus x reader #remus lupin imagine #remus lupin one shot #remus lupin blurb #remus my babygirl

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ravenyenn19 · 1 year

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OKAY HERE IT IS:

So!!! Results from my poll indicated that some of you don’t want to see “face inspo/casts” for my OG “Dealing With Our Demons” characters (totally respect that!! I sometimes prefer my image not tainted while reading, too!🖤)

SOoo… here’s what we’re going to do. I will be posting the images BELOW the cut, so that way if you would rather not see, you don’t have to!🖤 no offense whatsoever taken.

Before you continue, a note: NONE of these pictures are exactly how I picture my characters. These are simply the closest I could get/who I took inspo from when describing them. 🖤 Please do not feel like you need to agree w me. That is the beauty of reading, is it not? Love you. ALSo. This is long, but I wanted to include my notes for clarification if you wanted them. This was fun, getting to have a lil in depth convo w you guys.🥹

PS- IF YOU HAVE NOT READ MY FANFIC “Dealing With Our Demons” on ao3 (by ravenyenn19) & are planning to do so (thx in advance ily) THIS POST WILL HAVE SPOILERSISH. I say this bc while no plot will be ruined, you will see faces you are not meant to yet. 🖤

First up we have: Khalid Runa (Inej’s childhood best friend) & Rahul Runa (Inej’s older cousin) *these two are married, hence the shared surname*

Notes: Khalid is pretty close, actually. In DWOD, he has aquamarine/green eyes due to his partially Kaelish heritage & I do picture his skin tone to be a tad lighter due to this. ALSO: Khalid does have burn scars across most of his hands, though I was unable to find such an image to include that piece of “DWOD lore”. (The burns are from his years mastering ‘flame eating/fire dancing’ in the caravans.

Rahul: This image is mostly chosen for his facial structure, however I do picture Rahul to have close cropped hair (a sort of subversion upon the suli culture that makes his training as a medic easier. I do picture him also remaining clean-shaven with a skin tone that is very similar to his cousin, Inej Ghafa.)

Next: Nani (Mitra) Ghafa (Inej’s maternal grandmother)

Notes: This actress is actually Iranian, for note. SO: I do want to make it very clear that I picture Nani’s skin tone to be darker like Inej (though also I do think this photo was filtered bc the actress does seem to have slightly darker skin in other pics, I chose this one bc of her face & HOW SHE HOLDS HERSELF SO MUCH LIKE NANI.) All this being said, this one is pretttttty dang similar to how I pictured Nani while writing her. Facial features specifically. What a queen. What more is there to say? She could divine my tea leaves any time.

Sharya & Kahir Ghafa, Inej’s parents (technically not OG characters, but never named in canon)

Notes: Sharya is pretty dang close to how I imagined her, which is super cool considering I never used an inspo pic for either of the Ghafas when writing them (I found them for this purpose!). It probably sounds a bit weird, but like… I just knew how Sharya & Kahir looked. They were just…BAM. Full formed people in my head. This is ultimately SUCH A FLEX ON LEIGH BARDUGO’s PART. Like, we only really experienced glimpses of Inej’s parents through the few memories in her POVs but they absolutely stuck with me & formed wonderful characters as my fic progressed. (Of course this is my opinion, but I do hope ya’ll agree.🥹)

Kahir: So…. This pic is the closest I could get, & similar to Nani, I chose it based more on facial structure/in this case facial hair. HOWEVER, Kahir is very special to me. I wrote some of his scenes in moments after I had lost my godfather, (whom was the truest father I had. He meant everything to me, being my actual dad’s best friend, he helped raise me after my dad passed when I was 4.), hence, I feel the need to clarify- as I feel a bit of my own dad is in Kahir, if only in the love.)This pic is missing a smile that I imagine near permanent on Kahir Ghafa’s face, and eyes that I cannot explain in any other word but kind. Similar to Inej’s. Sparkly. Idk. ALSO: I do picture true black hair & less gray. Maybe a sprinkle of pepper in his beard, but not much. I just imagine Inej’s parents aging like fine wine. Idk.

Next….*drum roll*…. Dr. Lily Arbor (I waited so long to bring this girl to life.)

NOTES: Ok. So. Two pics here for our Darling Death Defier Mortician. 🫶🏻 So, the one on the left is more youthful to me, a bit closer (although not the right age) to how I imagine the Lily of Kaz’s childhood. The right being far closer to how I imagine 24 year old Lily. Yet, neither of these are exactly right. But they are close. The changes that are distinct within my mind are as follows: the eyes. I distinctly see them like 2 shades darker. Navy. It’s a rare eye color, but not that different. Next, the hair. In the left image, the curls are just right, but I imagine she keeps her hair slightly longer than that- both in girlhood & adulthood. Not nearly the length of Inej’s, but you feel me. Also I do imagine her hair a bit darker, like that sort of red with hints of almost brown in it? Maroon? Gosh I can’t explain but I am certain you guys probably get it. Less like Wylan’s orangish red. Lastly: this girl has more freckles. I don’t make the rules. (Actually I do since she’s a daughter of my mind, but no I don’t.)

Bonus heartbreak:

Jordie.🥹💔 (obviously aged up to if he were alive.) notes: NO ONE. I REPEAT. NO ONE looks exactly how I imagine the elder Rietveld son. The actor here is in fact Jess from Gilmore Girls. Milo is the closest I’ve come to finding an older Jordie face cast, based more on book Kaz in relation. His hair would obviously not be styled like the early 00’s. Obviously dark eyes like his brother. In a way, like Kahir, I imagine Jordie’s eyes would have a permanent sparkle of amusement that one would sometimes see mirrored in Kaz. I can’t explain it. I love Jordie & I’m about to have a fit all over again. 🫡

Next…. Bram Rietveld (technically not OG character, but he is not named nor described whatsoever in the canon material. Kaz only says that he and his brother missed their Da.🥹)

Notes: DO NOT COME FOR ME. I AM DEFENDING MYSELF. Not to sound cringe, but from the moment I put Kaz’s Da into DWOD, back in memories at the very very early stages of the story, I pictured Pedro. This was before the internet craze (I mean obvs he was famous but iykyk), & I know that sounds cringe but it’s true. Pedro Pascal IS Bram Rietveld. Like, I would change next to nothing. Obviously his voice would have a “southern” ring. Maybe he’d have slightly lighter skin naturally being of Kerch descent, but actually I imagine him quite tan at most points of the year from running the Rietveld farm & harvesting the wheat fields. Obviously, you can picture him differently, but this is damn near exact for me. Also, Last of Us only solidified that belief for me. Gosh dangit, look at this treasure! Bram loved his kids so much.

Are you ready? (I’d say I saved the best for last, but… Actually, no. I certainly did.) I present…

Emilia Winstrad, The Butcher of Belendt🪡

Notes: I love her. I love Emilia as much as I love the protagonists from my actual novel. She means so much to me. 🥹 I don’t think I can quite explain how excited I was (& how long I waited) to introduce you guys to Emilia. I hope you love her as much as I do in DWOD. As far as technical notes: Rachel McAdams (this actress) has quite honestly the exact facial features I pictured on Emilia. Like Bram, I feel like this is Em. However, there are a few minor changes: dark eyes like Kaz rather than hazel (it’s hard to tell here), & also the same dark hair as Kaz. True black. Tbh, I was shocked when I stumbled upon images of McAdams randomly (after already describing Emilia in the story)- it felt like seeing a picture of an online friend you’ve never actually met but they somehow appear exactly as you thought they would? Make sense?

Bonus pics that show the darker hair I imagine on another actress. Also the pipe picture just for funsies (iykyk)🫶🏻🪓

She is my pride & joy. Not only that, but I think she and Kaz were meant to be family. I am not Leigh & have no canon voice, but I swear somewhere in the multiverse she is canon & I say that with fear because it’s not meant to sound precocious. She just feels so real to me, but I’m sure that’s silly bc I wrote her. Idk. Take my ramblings 🖤

Oops my hand slipped, have more pain: Elena Rietveld (I consider Elena an OG character of mine as Kaz’s mother is never mentioned in canon despite that he obviously had one. Technically, it is never said whether she lived or died.)

Sorry I killed her.

Notes: OBVIOUSLY these are pics of the same actress because Em & Elle are identical twins. However, I did choose an image of McAdams from earlier in her acting career as she did pass away younger than when Emilia appears in the story. The same notes apply here as to Em, dark hair & dark eyes would be the changes. Though, I do love this pic representing Elena as there is something a bit softer about her over her sister. Where Emilia applies blood red lipstick, Elle is a petal pink. I think that metaphor fits best, but undoubtedly I wanted Elena to have her own strength in the memories where we get to glimpse her. A woman who chose her baby son, Kaz’s life over her own. The type of mother who would have run into a burning building for her kids. A fierce little sun ray who deserved a yellow kitchen. 🥹

I actually have images & notes completed for Pim & Anika as well, plus a bonus lil one that I doubt ya’ll were expecting, but alas, there is a limit of 10 images on a post 🫠 So… let me know if you want them.

This was so long. I’m long winded, but ya’ll knew that. I love you all so much. Thank you for being here. 🖤🐦‍⬛

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intersex-support · 2 months

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I'm concerned I may have an intersex condition and I'm not sure where to go from here. Could I ask for some advice?

Essentially, I'm realizing that I... probably didn't complete puberty the first time. I'm afab, and I did get a growth spurt and body hair and start to grow breasts, but I never developed past what I'm now realizing was probably about stage 3 on the Tanner Scale. My breasts stayed small enough that I could easily pass as male without binding (I'm nonbinary) and I was never able to find a bra small enough to fit me. Overall I was kinda just built like a tall preteen, and frequently mistaken for one well into my 20s

I'm also diagnosed with presumed endometriosis and had extremely irregular and painful periods for my entire life. Birth control pills didn't fully fix it and depo shots just made it worse, but when my gyno put me on nexplanon about 9 months ago it stopped my period altogether. More than that though... I think I'm going through puberty again, at the age of 25. I started experiencing breast growth and female-pattern fat redistribution that's very similar to what my transfem friends are going through on HRT, and I realized... my medication is literally just progestin. I'm essentially on feminizing HRT as an afab person. And after 9 months on HRT I've finally progressed to what looks like stage 4 on the Tanner Scale and I'm getting closer to stage 5

I did some research on what could be happening when I first started noticing the changes and found out that recent studies have linked endometriosis to estrogen dominance (either an excess of estrogen or a deficiency of progesterone) and the symptoms of both estrogen dominance and low progesterone seemed to fit me. Since the changes started after I went on progestin-only medication I figured that was my answer, that I had low progesterone bc of my endometriosis and it stunted my development. But recently I was talking with an intersex blogger who pointed out that having hormone deficiencies so severe they interrupt puberty isn't common for endometriosis and it might be a symptom of an intersex condition, and they recommended for me to look into hypogonadotropic hypogonadism

I've been doing research on it and. It really seems to describe what I went through. The only things that don't really fit me are the short height and lack of period, but that may just be bc I had an incomplete puberty instead of an absent one. More specifically though I learned about Kallmann Syndrome, and I know it's relatively rare, especially in afab people, but a lot of the other symptoms seem to fit me. The first, notably, is that I've had hyposmia my entire life which is a defining feature of the condition. I also have spinal defects: scoliosis, hyperlordosis, and cervical kyphosis. I even have some unexplained motor control issues that I'm now concerned may be mild ataxia, like my lifelong constant hand tremors and a general "clumsiness" that makes it difficult for me to get my limbs to do what I want—both of which cause frequent issues for me

I really wanna get some solid answers but I'm... not sure where to go from here. Would getting my hormones checked be a logical next step? If it's specifically progesterone that's affected for me I'm not sure if the tests will be able to tell the difference between natural progesterone and synthetic progestin though, and I can't go off my medication bc my endo is so bad without it that I won't be able to work. Maybe that's not even the hormone they would need to check anyways though, maybe it would be GnRH? Idk, I'm just a little bit lost. I'm considering going to Planned Parenthood to ask about it (my current gyno has not been very forthcoming with information about my own condition) but I'm nervous about seeing them without knowing if it's something they can even help with and I'm also worried about going in with too much information and having a doctor dismiss me as having given myself a "google diagnosis" 😣

Any advice on the process of seeking a diagnosis? Or any other next steps in general?

Also—I keep having this nagging thought in the back of my head that says even if I do turn out to have a form of HH it wouldn't "matter" now that I'm on HRT and finishing puberty. Any opinions on this? Would I still "count" as intersex if that's the case? And what if I can't get a diagnosis?

Hi anon,

So sorry for the late answer. Hope you've been doing well.

It definitely makes sense to me that you would be looking into Kallmann Syndrome, especially since you have hyposmia and that really is such a key part of that condition. I agree with the other blogger that it's worth looking into why your puberty was disrupted/incomplete and regardless of whether it's Kallmann Syndrome, another intersex variation, or something else, that might be helpful information to have. And I totally get what you mean about it "not mattering" to get a diagnosis now that you're on HRT, and honestly, what is most important is your priorities and wishes in this process.

It is completely valid to want this information and search for a diagnosis, and to want an answer even though you've now found a treatment that works. If you decide at some point through the process that diagnosis is not a priority for you right now, that's okay too--what matters is that you are the authority here and that you have the right to feel whatever way you feel about it. The intersex community has such an incredible amount of variety--we all have so many different variations, different experiences, ways that symptoms show up or don't show up, and there's no "right" way to be intersex. All ways of being intersex are valuable and real ways that we're going to show up in our community.

The process of seeking a diagnosis can be kind of long and frustrating, but I'd say the first step would definitely be trying to get a referral to an endocrinologist or any doctor who is willing to run a full hormone panel on you, (generally this includes estrogen, testosterone, progesterone, FSH, LH, SHBG, and thyroid hormones). For Kallmann Syndrome, they would be looking for low estrogen, FSH, and LH levels. They would probably also run some other blood tests checking general blood chemistry levels to rule out any other causes. The next step for Kallmann diagnosis is sometimes an MRI to rule out any physical abnormalities on the pituitary gland. Finally, there is also molecular genetic testing for Kallmann that can help identify the specific genetic mutation, but the diagnosis can also be made without genetic testing or an MRI. Planned Parenthood might be a good first step, either to actually do the first set of labs or to provide you to a referral to a endocrinologist who would be willing to order the labs. It can definitely be really hard navigating doctors who are dismissive of our own self-knowledge and research, and I've found it can sometimes be more helpful to just explain your symptoms (lack of periods, lack of puberty) and ask for a full hormone panel rather than specifically telling the doctor that you want to test for Kallmann's.

Overall, just know that you absolutely aren't alone in this and that you are welcome to come back to the blog with any other questions or just to vent. It can be confusing and overwhelming trying to navigate the medical system, and you deserve support! Best of luck on this journey 💜

#asks #intersex #kallmann syndrome #hypogonadism

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meatsex · 3 months

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This may be odd to say. But it is clear (to me!!) that you care about the sauce boss a lot in your art and find a lot of comfort in who he is. The way you draw his eyes & hair specifically really calls to your attention to detail that's present in all of your art. It doesn't come across as parasocial in the slightest either - you just genuinely like what he does and play with the idea of the dude and aren't weird about his personal life. Idk maybe I'm not making sense but it's nice to see.

Also, your art really does reflect the same type of feelings as Sachiko Kaneoya's captures, in my opinion. Your use of line work and shadows also speaks to the ukiyo-e prints of the Edo period of Japan, though I'm not sure if that's intentional!! Specifically, the Takiyasha the Witch print is what the shadowing reminds me of.

Lastly, the dedication to your projects and work as a whole is so impressive. I've been here for a while following your art and watching the progress has been so cool. Your colors have become a little more cohesive and pull pieces together - they always have, but the grasp on color theory is clear there. Seeing that you're going to college to pursue what you put so much work into is the dream and I really hope it works out!!

I'm so sorry for how long this is and if it's weird, absolutely don't feel the need to respond especially since you can't shorten the post and I can't get it under a readmore. I also understand that having an anonymous person do a mini-tour and discussion of your art could be uhh possibly odd. If anything, keep being cool and doing what you love!!! It's awesome!!!!

hey, thank you for such a nice indepth message and analysis on my work, i promise it really isnt weird or at the very least any weirder than other messages ive got LOL

thank you for appreciating my art of vincent, i usually mention this but a lot of times i mostly draw inspired by his music rather than him as an internet personality which is why i end up making these edgy pieces but in general he does mean a lot to me in the most normal appreciate way possible both as a musician and as a streamer, i try not to streamline the way i draw him too much so im glad the small details are noticeable

i can confirm i get inspired (and always have been honesly) by kaneoya sachiko's works if it wasnt obvious enough but i am also happy to hear that i can give off a similar vibe, not because i want to give off the exact specific vibes of her artwork but rather some of similar tones and types; as for the other thing that actually isnt on purpose, id have to look into artwork from that period but thats one hell of a compliment tbh

im really happy to hear that you have been around for a while, i cannot know since when but either way it means a lot that someone would take the time to not just point out my improvement but also to just stay around because they like what i do, i personally feel like ive improved especially in colors like you mentioned but its always better and helpful to hear it from someone else too, i hope that with college i can become better at art too

in any case thank you again for taking the time to send such a positive thought-out message, i dont want to repeat in-depth but it really is and it means the world to me that you took the time to send it and i promise its not weird at all

#po/box #i will admit that when i opened my ask box and saw a really long message i got scared before i began recognizing positive words lol #its nice to get something like this for a change along with the other nice messages i keep for myself #long post #<- if you are a hater

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zombryz · 1 year

Text

♡ all my suffering ♡ chapter 4

˗ˏˋ hello ˎˊ˗

Chapter Four

Pairings: Shigaraki x f!reader x Dabi

A/N: Hello my friends! First of all, thank you for reading this far and I appreciate all the support :) Enjoy the 4th chapter! Also, FYI - I do have the ending planned out so I'm not writing the plot of the story as we go, but lets just say this is elevated porn with plot (sorry). I just enjoy writing action scenes... let me know if its not very entertaining and I can cut it back some.

Warnings: Specific to this chapter - blood, lots of blood, Sexual assault, angst, abuse (physical and emotional), possessiveness, slowburn progression, TW for Overhaul in general (Idk why I hate him lol)

Word Count: 7k

You left Dabi sleeping on the mattress as you quickly followed Shigaraki out of the garden shed, adjusting your T-shirt and smoothing out your hair. The last thing you wanted was to make him more annoyed with you. This walk of shame was going to suck. Shigaraki was standing next to his Nomu, facing the woods in the direction of the house, waiting for you as you dove beneath the same wooden panel as the previous night. Shigaraki was standing there with his arms crossed. You were embarrassed and concerned about his sudden stoicism. Your cheeks turned scarlet as you purposefully waited to speak first. Since you first saw him, months ago now, his light blue hair has gradually grown longer. Now it was almost past his shoulders and was blowing slightly in the wind. You really took in his looks under the morning sun, admiring how his arms looked in the black shirt he was wearing.

“Tch,” he begins without looking back at you, “you’re going to have to change before I hand you over.” He states this nonchalantly, his voice extremely monotone.

“I-I know. I’m sorry,” your voice cracks from using it for the first time that morning; suddenly very nervous to be in his presence, “I’ll be quick.”

“Good.” He left it at that before walking toward the house ahead of you, his nomu in tow.

Once you got back to the house, you quickly changed into your hero costume. Villain Costume? Oh, you didn’t even know anymore. There were still rips from where you were captured that night months ago. Eventually, you’ll have to consider getting a replacement or at least a patch up. You sighed heavily as you equipped your knives to your thighs. What even happened last night? You slept with Dabi; you remember now. Your face heats up thinking about his face in between your thighs. What does that mean for you? Did you like him? Did he like you? Suddenly, your brain goes back to your walk back to the house with Shigaraki. He didn’t say anything else to you. The tension was thick in the air. He didn’t even prepare you for your job with Overhaul, which seems like something he should’ve done. Or maybe you should’ve asked him. It’s too late now. You’ll just have to ask Toga.

A big, blacked-out van comes to pick you up, along with Toga and Twice. The two of them were giddy and happy about having a job that could finally contribute to the group. They spent the ride talking and playing rock, paper, scissors. You, however, were stuck in your head thinking about Dabi and how you didn’t say goodbye to him in your rush to chase after Shigaraki that morning. You hoped he would understand why you left so quickly. Heck, he’s a hot villain, so you were sure he probably slept with loads of girls in the past, and they were probably all one-night stands. He didn’t seem like the relationship type, and he definitely knew what he was doing in bed. The thought made your stomach sink—thinking about him sleeping with tons of other girls. With that, you pulled up to your destination and were pulled from your thoughts. Thank god.

As the three of you exited the van, you saw him. You didn’t even realize how much pent-up anger you still had for the man standing only a few feet in front of you now. Your brows furrowed in anger like those of an untrusting dog ready to attack. Twice felt your energy and put his arm in front of your body, prepared to hold you back if necessary. Overhaul was surrounded by his men, who were polished and wearing black suits and ties. They looked like hit men, and that's probably exactly what they did for work. “It’s okay, Y/N.” Twice whispered to try and console you. You hadn’t even noticed your knuckles whitening as you brought your hand down to one of your knives.

“Welcome, my League of Villains associates,” he started. His hands were behind his back, and he still spoke through that dumb fucking mask that he always wore. At least Shigaraki’s was scary. Overhaul’s just made him look like a tall, man bird. You truly hated him. He noticed right away that your hateful eyes were fixed on him. “Y/N, I hear you’re this group’s team leader.” He speaks directly to you now, a small smirk on his lips.

You had no clue what he was talking about considering Shigaraki didn’t really brief you that morning, but you weren’t going to let Overhaul get the upper hand here. “Yeah, I am,” you say, feeling the haste on your tongue as you suck in through your teeth.

“Good, follow me,” he turned away, signaling for you to follow him with the wave of his hand. “The other two can go with my men here.” You were suddenly worried and didn’t want to be separated from Toga and Twice. Overhaul was not someone you could see yourself ever trusting. It's a shame, but he got on your shit list the day he killed Magne. Twice pulled his arm away from you, and Toga shot you a sympathetic smile. You followed him inside, down an elevator, and through hallway after hallway. Left, right, and right again, you tried to remember your exit plan while he was leading you, but all the walls looked the same—gray, boring, and without windows since you were underground. Great.

You arrived at a room that had the appearance of a guest room. The bedsheets were done up like a hotel, and there was a small side table with a lamp next to it. A small TV sat in the corner of the room. The walls were just as gray in the room as they were in the hall. You frowned at the sight. “Is this where I’ll be staying?” You spoke up before Overhaul had the chance to even give you a tour of your home for the week.

“Yeah, it i-”

You cut him off once more: “Where are Toga and Twice going to be staying?” You interjected, crossing your arms and not giving a damn that he was still speaking.

“They’ll be in the two rooms next to yours.” He gestures to the rooms behind you with a tilt of his chin. You stay quiet this time. Not really having much else to say to him, hoping this conversation would be over soon. He pauses for a long moment, unsure if you were going to speak up again. He takes a moment to take you in. This was the closest he’s ever been to you. The girl who managed to make him bleed, he thought. What an interesting specimen you were. He thought you were pretty and had an aura that made you frightening. You were a mystery to him, and he wanted to know why Shigaraki wouldn’t exactly give you up as easily as he did the others.

“Are we done?” You interrupt his thoughts. Not sure why you’re still having this awkward conversation.

“You’re kind of feisty, aren’t you?” He chuckles softly. It was definitely not a noise you expected him to make.

“Only with people I have no interest in speaking with.” You crossed your arms this time; this action made his eyes fix on your side, and then his eyes slowly trailed down to your legs, examining your bodysuit. It was filled with holes and rips from your previous fights. He didn’t like how unkempt it was.

“I’ll have my team get you a new suit.” He ignores your previous comment. His eyes move back up to yours, and suddenly you feel small. You don’t let go of your false confidence, though, as he continues to stare you down. “Before we talk about why you’re here, are you hungry?” Now that you thought about it, you were starving. Shigaraki barely kept food on the table for the league; it was usually everyone for themselves, so you don’t remember the last time you had something to eat that wasn’t stolen. You must have lost about 10 pounds since joining the league. Actually, a lot of the members were kind of scrawny. This thought made you sad. All you could do was nod and Overhaul once again lead you through the hallways of the yakuza stronghold.

When you came across a small kitchen in one of the big rooms underground, you saw a few random men seated at one of the tables, but upon seeing Overhaul, they got up and left. He grabbed a sandwich from the fridge and handed it to you before grabbing a water bottle and leading you over to one of the tables. You both take a seat, and you are skeptical for a moment but reluctantly take the two items from him anyway.

“Why are you being so nice to me?” you ask while scarfing down the sandwich he gave you. Maybe you should be more worried about him possibly poisoning you, but you weren’t sure that you cared considering how good the sandwich was. Overhaul sat across from you and you shifted uncomfortably as the metal table touched your bare skin where the giant hole resided in your suit. He had taken off his mask and placed it on the table so that he could eat as well, and you still weren’t sure why he even wore the stupid thing. Maybe to keep up the scary morale? Who knows. He was kind of like Shigaraki, but they were more mirror images of each other. The opposite, if you will. It was kind of weird how you felt like you were having deja vu. Your eyebrows were still furrowed in anger. You were starting to think they would permanently be like that around him, although he was being nice for the time being. You still hated him, and before anything else, you didn’t trust him. “You should hate me like I hate you,” you added bluntly before taking another bite of your food.

“Why would I hate you?” He chuckled once more. This time you looked at him, and your brows softened ever so slightly. You could finally see his smile without his mask. Overhaul certainly wasn’t ugly. He would probably be classified as a pretty boy to other people. You feel like Toga might like him if she were here. He had dark and alluring eyes with long bottom and top eyelashes. He had a beauty mark under his eye that just added to his pretty features.

“Well, for starters, I did that to you.” You sat up a little and pointed with your sandwich at the big scar on his wrist; it had barely healed. You honestly weren’t even sure if he realized it was you who threw the knife at him. Everything happened so quickly that, for all you knew, he didn’t see who threw it.

“Yeah, you’re a pretty good shot,” he smiles lowly before looking up into your eyes through his lashes. He takes a bite of his food and doesn’t take his eyes off you.

“I don’t know about that; I was aiming for your head.” You looked away from him. A small smirk escapes your lips.

His expression was calm as he chuckled at your words again. A full-on smile was plastered on his face this time. What’s with this guy?

“I took your friend’s life and your other friend's arm,” he says casually, shifting the conversation back to a serious tone. The anger bubbles up in you once more as you remember that day. “I’m sorry.”

What? He’s apologizing? You admit that you did not see that coming. Was he just trying to get on your good side? Was he trying to recruit you? Something felt off. You still didn’t trust him.

“Don’t get it twisted. I am still going to kill you if I get the chance.” You frown. “For Magne,” you state coldly.

His expression doesn’t falter. Instead, he shifts in his seat to put his hands under his chin, resting his elbows on the table. He understands that your relationship wasn’t going to heal in a day.

“You work for me now,” he pauses. “Well, for this week at least. Unless I can convince Shigaraki to fully hand you over to me.” He starts speaking business, and your ears perk up. “I don’t know if that will ever happen, though; you’re very special to him.” You freeze at his words. Why? Special? After a moment, you realize he probably meant because of your quirk. That had to be it, right? He continues, “We received intel that it's possible that at some point this week the hero society will try to infiltrate our base,” your eyes widen.

“W-What? Is that why we’re here? Does Shigaraki know?” Your voice betraying you and coming out a bit strange as you speak through your anxiety. That meant that you might see some of your old hero friends. You were not ready for this at all.

“Hey, don’t worry. I’m not planning on having you on the battle front. Your sole responsibility is to heal my men if they are injured in the fight.” He notices the concern in your face and says, “Plus, this is a stronghold; we’ve held up down here for almost a century.” His words console you. You take a deep breath in.

“Okay,” you reply with more certainty in your voice this time. You want to ask him why they don’t relocate, but remember quickly that he said they’ve been down there for almost a century. You didn’t really think to ask what the Hassaikai did for the hero society to try to infiltrate them. You’ll come to realize that you wish you had asked. “And for the record, Shigaraki doesn’t own me. I can make my own decisions about who I work for.” Overhaul smiles at your sudden blurt.

♡

The next morning, you stirred awake with wide eyes at the realization that someone's arms were wrapped around your waist. Their face was plastered to your back, and they were snoring softly. You almost panicked before you looked down and saw Toga's delicate fingers holding on to your shirt. She was such a sweetheart; you had grown to love her like a sister these past few months. You suddenly hear more snoring coming from your floor; this time it sounded more manly. You slowly roll toward the edge of the bed and see Twice laying on the floor with a pillow and a blanket. His face was half-wrapped with a piece of silk, and his blonde hair was messily sprawled on the pillow. Cute. Overhaul’s men had given you each a set of dark gray scrubs to sleep in, so you were all matching. It almost felt like you were in jail, but you admit it felt good to eat real food and sleep in a real bed for once. It was cute that the two other members didn’t want to sleep alone. You didn’t blame them at all.

Toga had started to wake up, and you felt bad for moving around so much. You turned toward her and rubbed a small circle on her cheek and whispered, “Go back to sleep; it’s okay.” She nodded with her eyes closed and turned over in bed. The league really was like the family you never had. As you got out of bed, you quietly stepped over Twice and walked out of the room. To your surprise, one of Overhaul's men was posted just outside and turned to look at you as you jumped a little. It's good to know he didn’t trust you either.

“I have instructions to bring you to the boss once you’re awake.” You groan, already irritated. He had a mask on that was similar to Overhaul’s and carried a machine gun in his arms. Did he really think you guys were that dangerous?

“What time is it anyway?” you ask the masked stranger as he radios his replacement. Another masked man comes running down the hall to stand guard over Toga and Twice. If you had known this would be a whole thing, you would’ve just woken them up too.

“It’s almost 5 a.m.,” he answered gruffly.

“Is Overhaul even awake yet?” Your eyebrows raised; you were a little confused by all this but followed the man anyways.

“Guess we’ll see, won’t we?”

You follow the man down some halls to the elevator that brought you down before. He swiped his keycard and clicked level 5. You noticed you were on level 7 currently. Damn, you suddenly remembered just how deep underground you were. The thought makes you nauseous. You walk down the hall and see a few other men wearing the same uniform as your guide. All of them have guns. It felt darker on this floor for some reason. The walls must be a darker shade of gray. Once you arrive at what you assume is where Overhaul is, you watch as your guide whispers something to the two men posted outside the door and then brings his arm up to lightly knock on the double doors. You hear something inside and then a “Come in.”

Your guide pushes you inside and closes the door behind you. Okay? Rude. You look around the room, but it's pretty dark, so you can only make out shapes that resemble a bedroom with lots of furniture. Suddenly, the room is illuminated with the sound of a clap that makes you jump a little. It was still kind of dark; only the corners of the room were lit up with a comfortable, warm light. You let your eyes adjust and looked around you. The room was massive and filled with furniture that you only saw in the homes of top heroes. There was a fireplace to the left, along with a huge shag rug. To your right was a kitchen and living room combo with marbled countertops and a massive flat screen that came out of the wall. The couch looked like a cloud and was big, white, and fluffy. On top of that, everything was pristine. The floors were marbled black and looked like they had never seen a speck of dust. You allowed your wanderlust to get the best of you, and your eyes snapped back to the center of the room, where you noticed an all-black king bed with silk sheets and a beautiful stone backwall. On the bed was Overhaul, who sat up leaning on one of his hands while the other rubbed the sleep out of his eyes. He was shirtless, and the silk sheets fell to his hips. You were suddenly embarrassed and didn’t expect him to be so ripped. His night sweat was glistening in between his pecs. You diverted your eyes and placed your arms behind your back, feeling awkward. A sudden redness made its way to your cheeks; you weren’t sure how to feel in this moment. Instead of the anger that usually spreads across your face when in his presence, this time you had a look of shock and nervousness.

“I’ll be honest, I didn’t expect you to be up so early; maybe I should’ve told my men to just make you go back to sleep instead of bringing you here.” His morning voice is deep and raspy, making you squirm even more.

“I-I’m sorry, I can go,” you start towards the door. Your voice is small and far.

“No, it’s okay,” he starts, uncovering himself as he gets out of bed. “You’re already here; we can start the day.” He stands up and stretches, showing off more of his body unintentionally. His pants were dangerously low, and you couldn’t help but stare at him. Damn it. He sucks. You can’t be thinking about him like that.

“Um, okay, sure,” your voice cracks slightly.

“I actually have something for you,” he walks over to his kitchen as your eyes follow him. His back is equally toned. You have got to pull it together. “Here, I had them rush this, and we got lucky; they had one already in the warehouse." "I hope it fits.” You walk over to him and grab the piece of clothing from his hands. You backed away, nervous to be this close to him.

“A new suit?” You look at the fabric in your hands. It felt very similar to your old one but was made with better quality material. It was also… “Purple?” you ask bluntly. A dark lavender, from what you could tell, which wasn't the color of your old hero suit but you didn’t mind it. Maybe it was time to retire it anyway. You weren’t a hero anymore.

“Yeah, thats kind of my color,” he rubs the back of his neck. “I thought it’d look good on you,” he yawns. You remember his jacket that had the purple ruffles. Great. You’ll be matching with the guy you hate most. You roll your eyes internally.

“Cool,” you say as you tuck the suit under your arm.

“Do you want to head back down and wake the others?”

“Sure.”

Overhaul walks you out of his room, and the man who was your guide earlier walks you back to your room. Toga and Twice were still sleeping, so you lightly tapped on their foreheads to wake them up. Once they were awake, you were brought to the showers and got ready for the day. You sighed as you rubbed the fabric of the suit between your fingers. This felt significant somehow, like you were officially packing up your old life and starting a new one. You pull on the suit; this one zips in the front and buttons at the top of your neck, allowing you to control how much clevage you wanted to show, which was nice. You decided not to show any. Overall, it fit well; it was a little tight in the ass area, but that was okay. Lastly, you put on your black combat boots as well as your thigh holster for your throwing knives. Overhaul made sure the suit was fingerless so that you could still activate your quirk easily. He also gave you a waist pack that matched your boots. It was filled with medical equipment, and there was even a secret compartment in the back that was a holster for a butterfly knife, which he gifted you a purple one to match. You wore it on the back side so that it was out of the way and you could easily grab the butterfly knife handle if you needed it. You looked in the mirror; your hair was still dripping wet. You put a black mask around your ears to become one of the hassaikai and noticed a small hickey on your neck below your right ear that was quickly fading, and it made you think about Dabi. You wondered what he was doing right now and if he even missed you. You couldn’t decipher how you were feeling but had a twinge of guilt thinking about Overhaul. You drain the water from your hair and braid it back in pigtails. You took one last look at the new you, feeling confident and ready.

♡

The week was almost over. Tomorrow was your last day at the stronghold. Thank god. You couldn't really take any more little awkward moments with Overhaul. He was starting to grow on you, and you hated that. You, of course, still didn’t trust him, but it was nice to have someone to talk to while you were there. Toga and Twice didn’t really have much to say. Their loyalty was with Shigaraki, so they only did what they were told in front of Overhaul, and Overhaul was always next to you. You suppose your loyalty was with Shigaraki as well. Deep down, you knew you were loyal to him, but you weren’t really sure why. The week had been so slow that it was driving you mad. Overhaul manned both Toga and Twice at the front of the stronghold elevators, and there was a barrier of his men between you and them. They were on the front lines, which made you nervous, but as the week went on, your anxiety dissipated, and you felt like the attack would never come. Overhaul kept you with him in a huge room at the back end of floor five. You were sitting next to him, fidgeting with your nails, when you heard a sudden boom come from a couple levels up. It shook the entire room and made the dust shake off the walls. That can’t be good. Suddenly, Overhaul’s radio went off, and one of his men could be heard yelling on the comms, “They’re here! Everyone, the heroes are here! They—” and the room was met with radio silence. You looked over at Overhaul, who was surprisingly calm.

“What should I do?” You looked to him for orders, your face drowning in worry. He stayed quiet as he began zoning out. He stood up and placed his hands in his pockets. You were confused.

“Come with me,” he signaled you to follow him, and so you did.

As you followed him down the hallway, the rumbling of the building worsened, and you could hear screaming from the upper levels. Overhaul was walking fast, and you were trying to keep up with him.

“Hey! Stop!” You heard a man's voice from down the hall. What? Are they down here already? No way. Your eyes widened as you turned around to look at who the voice belonged to. You were closer to him, and Overhaul stood behind you. Your eyes met a blonde man who looked to be only a few years younger than you. He was built like Allmight, and his eyes were dark blue. He had on his hero costume, which was yellow and white with a red cape. Across his chest was the number 1,000,000. Your mind went blank as you started to recognize him; you couldn’t quite place his name, though. You just remembered that he was a student at U.A. High. Once his eyes locked on yours, you could tell he was also trying to piece together how he knew you.

“Lady Medela? You’re working with these people?” He finally recognizes you, and his voice comes out strained. You don’t answer, and so he continues, “You’re on the missing persons list, ya know? Are you in trouble?” He sucks in through his teeth, anger overwhelming him once more. He diverts his eyes back to Overhaul, who is just standing behind you with his hands in his pockets. You are silent, but your eyes show that you’re in pain and confused by his words. You remember your life before, but now that you were actually face to face with a hero, you were tempted to run to him and let him save you from all this. The hero in front of you drops his head and his voice cracks; he’s on the verge of tears as he says this: “Did you know he’s keeping a little girl here that he’s torturing and using as a weapon?” He looks back at you through angry eyes now. He was still holding onto the hope that you weren’t working with Overhaul.

“What? Is that true?” The heroes' words cause you to turn around and face Overhaul now. Your furious, angry face returns, along with all the hatred you’ve harbored for him. You drop every ounce of whatever it was you felt with him to resort back to anger. You slowly reach for your butterfly knife, but it all happened so fast. Overhaul quickly overpowers you and puts his hand around your neck, locking you in a chokehold. The hero, a couple of feet away, tries to run after you when a crashing noise is met with one of Overhaul's men falling through the floor, blocking you from the young hero. His men immediately start fighting with him, drowning out your need for rescue.

“C’mon, how about I take you to her?” Overhaul’s voice is suddenly sinister, and you can feel your heart beat in your temples as the blood rushes to your head, depriving you of oxygen. He turns down the hall with his arm still around your throat. He throws you up against a wall, and he pulls down your mask to rub his finger over your lips roughly. He then kisses you aggressively and bites your lip hard enough to make you bleed. You whimper in pain, and he pulls away, adding, “You can finally meet my daughter.” He lets go of your neck to shift you in front of him, and as you’re gasping for air, you see him swing back his fist to punch you in the face, knocking you out.

---

You’re not sure how long it's been, but you wake up in a dark room with a throbbing headache. There is a little girl sitting over you, shaking you awake with tears in her eyes. She’s terrified and saying something, but you can’t hear her. She looks to be about seven or eight years old and has long, blueish gray hair, red eyes, and a little horn on the side of her forehead. If you didn’t know any better, you would think she was related to Shigaraki. You put two and two together and knew she had to be Overhaul’s daughter. That son of a bitch, he punched you! You get up quickly and reach for the throbbing part of your skull.

“Don’t move so fast, you’ll hurt yourself!” The little girl warns you; her voice is small and sweet.

“It’s okay; I’m okay.” You send her a small smile. You curse yourself for not knowing she was here the whole time you were here. You take in her appearance, and shes in a hospital gown covered in bandages. Overhaul is going to pay for this. “Now, how about you and I get out of here, huh?” She looks at you with barely any hope in her eyes but nods to your statement. Poor girl. “My name is Y/N. What’s yours?” you ask, trying to get her to talk again.

“Eri,” she responds in a soft voice that breaks your heart.

“Okay, Eri, I’m going to heal my headache enough to have the energy to get us out of here.” She nods, and you activate your quirk just enough to make the throbbing go away. You then pick her up and carry her on your back. She snuggles into your shoulder blades, and you start walking towards the door. The medical room was dark, and the only light was coming from a small window in the steel door. You try kicking the door, but have no luck. You then step back and take a deep breath before cracking your knuckles. “Cover your eyes and ears if you can.” You warn her before slamming your fist into the window. Nothing happens at first, so you put more force into the second punch, causing it to shatter. Your fist is immediately covered in blood and glass. You pull a large shard out of your knuckle, hissing at the pain. Once you’re clear, you reach through the window and unlock the door, cutting up your forearm in the process. There is blood everywhere, and you think you might pass out, but you stay strong for Eri. On the other side of the door, you activate your quirk for a second time, which is enough to stop the bleeding in both places, but because of your head injury, you’re unable to heal fully. You look around both halls and don’t see anyone. It’s quiet. You decide to head toward the emergency stairwell, and you take off, shifting Eri into a more comfortable position. “Okay, up we go. You ready?” You communicate with her so shes not scared. She just nods into your shoulder blades, and you take off running down the hall.

You and Eri make your way up five flights of stairs, and you’re in pain and out of breath. You try to hold yourself together and remind yourself that there are only two more flights of stairs left. The building was still shaking from all the fighting, so you held on to the rails for dear life. Once you made it to stairwell level-two, you started quickening your pace. You were almost out when suddenly the stairs from level-one started collapsing, and your eyes widened in fear of being crushed. You spun around and dove through the level-two door that brought you back into the halls. Eri asked if you were okay while you were on your hands and knees struggling to breathe. You just patted her leg in response and tried to get up and stand. You struggled for a moment and finally got back up on your feet. You had no choice but to walk the halls now, and you had no clue if you would run into heroes or Hassaikai members. You took it with a grain of salt and continued on, hoping for the best. After walking for a few minutes, you heard loud rumbling once more, and it sounded very close to you. There was a room up ahead that had been blown up, and a lot of the load-bearing walls were about to give. As you got closer, you noticed it was a small warehouse, and there were people fighting inside. You kept your distance, approached the area quietly, and stayed low to the ground, hoping the people fighting wouldn’t notice you. There he was: Overhaul. He was fighting someone. You ran to a closer wall that could give you a better glimpse of the battle. He was fighting the blonde hero from earlier along with another familiar hero, a small man who had on a green hero suit paired with red shoes. Suddenly, Overhaul sent concrete spikes up from the ground to try and hit both of the heroes. You froze for a second in shock when you felt something impale your leg. After a moment, you felt cold, and when you looked down, you saw one of the spikes sticking out of your calf. You dropped to your knees once he released the spikes, sending them back into the ground. A bloodcurdling scream came from your lungs, and then it felt like the fighting halted when all three men looked over at you. Instead of looking at them, you kept your focus on your leg. Your face was contorted in pain, and you immediately broke out in a sweat. The spike had ripped your muscles to shreds. The two heroes noticed Eri on your back and decided to fall back to where you were. Overhaul noticed you and his daughter, and that both heroes were trying to make their way to you. He wasn’t going to have that. He shot off more concrete blasts, but the smaller hero was faster; he noticed this, and his fist met Overhaul’s face. He kept hitting him over and over, not allowing him access to you. The blonde hero used the distracted Overhaul to fall through the floor and appear again next to you. He took Eri from your back and attempted to help you.

“Can you stand?” He reaches his hand out to you and tries to help you up.

“I-I need-d to fix my leg first,” you struggle to reply through your broken sobs, the pain causing you to go in and out of consciousness. You weren’t even sure if you could activate your quirk in this state or if you had the energy to heal yourself. Your hair began to float slightly, and your pupils flickered into white glowing orbs. When you grabbed your calf, the hole in your leg slowly began repairing the muscle, stitching itself back together again. You’ve lost too much blood at this point, and your head injury was bad, so you were only able to heal it enough to fix the muscle. The wound was still big and bloody, but you couldn’t keep going, you had no more energy left. The room began to spin, and you knew you were about to pass out. Before you did, you looked over at the blonde hero and grabbed his hand.

“M-Make sure you get Eri somewhere safe.” He nodded and started saying something about how he was going to make sure you got out of here too, but his words fell on deaf ears. You were already out of it; you fell backwards, and the hero made sure to catch you enough before laying you down softly on the concrete floor. He escaped with Eri, leaving the fight to the other hero. Once the battle ended, Overhaul was arrested, and the search crew began going floor by floor, recovering bodies and the injured. You were unconscious when someone picked you up off the floor, bridal style.

---

“She’s still feverish, but I think she’s finally waking up,” You hear a familiar voice in your vicinity. A hand comes to rest on your forehead to feel your fever. There were muffled voices in the background, but you couldn’t quite make them out. “Hey, Y/N, it’s us; you’re okay.” Her voice was calm and eased you. It was Toga’s voice; you’d recognize it anywhere.

“W-What happened?” You finally go to sit up and once again grab your aching skull. You look down at your body and see that you were still in your bodysuit, which is ripped at your leg. It looked like someone cut the fabric to be able to apply bandages to your wound. You remember what happened now. “Where is Overhaul?” You grumbled angrily, more angry than the League has ever seen you.

“He was arrested.” Twice replied. You follow his voice with your eyes and see the rest of the league gathered around you. They had stationed you on the kitchen table and used towels, blankets, and anything else they could find as padding for a makeshift hospital bed. You were in the hideout, and by the looks of it, it was evening. There were candles all over the kitchen, and everyone's faces looked warm under the candlelight.

“How did I get out?” You asked, not remembering anything.

“Toga and I found you covered in ruble, and we snuck you out.” Twice answered once more. You looked around the kitchen again and saw both Shigaraki and Dabi on the other side of the room, standing in the shadows. Shigaraki was maskless and emotionless. Dabi, on the other hand, looked angry and upset. They were both not looking in your direction. Toga, Twice, Spinner, and Mr. Compress were surrounding you, making sure you were okay.

“Y/N, what happened with Overhaul?” Spinner chimed in.

“I’m going to kill him,” you hissed while wiping your mouth, remembering how he kissed you and violated you. Your hatred for the man was spewing all over your words. The league looked at you in surprise. Shigaraki’s ears perked up at this and he finally looked over at you. It was odd for him to see you, nothing but a little hero, threaten to kill someone. He wasn’t sure how to feel about it, but he knew that whatever Overhaul did to you must’ve been bad for you to want to kill him. Shigaraki suddenly felt angry at Overhaul, his thoughts immediately going to the worst possibility. If he hurt you, he’d kill him for you. You wouldn’t even have to lift a finger. You went on to explain everything to the league. Most of them had the same reaction—disgust written all over their faces. When you finished explaining, you looked up at Shigaraki, and he was already looking at you. His face showed no emotion—no anger, no sympathy. You wanted to know what he was thinking. After all, this was his whole gig. You were there because of him. Before you could say anything to him, he called out to Dabi, Spinner, and Mr. Compress, telling them to come with him.

“Toga, Twice, stay here and hold things down; we’ll be back,” Shigaraki hissed out. You laid your head back on the table; you were still exhausted and needed to rest.

“We’re going to fuck him up, aren’t we?” Dabi turned to walk next to Shigaraki with his hands in his pockets. He smiled evilly, hoping thats what they were going to do for your sake. Dabi wanted to stay back with you, but an order is an order.

“He’ll never be able to touch her again.” Shigaraki growls while walking ahead of the men; his face was calm, but there was a storm inside him. Your anger toward Overhaul has transferred itself to Shigaraki.

---

It was becoming daylight, and Spinner, Dabi, Mr. Compress, and Shigaraki were all in a truck traveling along the highway in route to Tartarus from the hospital that Overhaul was rumored to be at. They had circled back around a few times before they saw their target. A black van with red lights drove onto the ramp of the highway, and Shigaraki signaled to Spinner to get in front of them. Spinner obliged and drove the truck to line up with the van behind them. The back doors of the truck opened, and Dabi released a giant blue flame toward the van. It was as if they had anticipated an attack. Dabi’s flames were met with a sand cloud, and a separate police vehicle drove in front of the black van to protect it. Shigaraki had climbed to the top of the truck and waited for the heroes to show themselves. He jumped off the back of the truck and toward the police car. The sand hero put up a wall of sand that Shigaraki struggled against. Mr. Compass then released a marble that made the police car flip over. Dabi then jumped out of the back of the truck and stopped the sand hero freeing Shigaraki. The van itself was then stopped by Shigaraki’s decay; he broke the windshield of the car and caused the driver to drive the van into a wall. Shigaraki walked to the back of the van and ripped Overhaul out. He was strapped to a foam pad, handcuffed, and wearing a straight jacket. Overhaul caught a glimpse of Shigaraki standing over him, and his eyes widened in fear. Shigaraki was covered in his usual villain attire and had his hands in his pockets while his foot rested on Overhaul’s chest.

“Are you here to kill me?” Overhaul whimpers.

“No, I wouldn’t take that away from Y/N,” Shigaraki chuckles. “She wants you dead,” He leans closer to Overhaul to whisper, “I’m just here to make you pay for what you did.” Shigaraki grabs one of Overhaul’s arms and dusts it. Before it can spread to the rest of his body, Shigaraki takes a knife and cuts it off. Overhaul wails in pain, and Shigaraki calmly says, “This one is for Magne and Compress.” He then shifts his body to Overhaul’s other arm and does the same. Overhaul screams once more, and Shigaraki replies to this with, “And this arm, this arm, if for laying your hands on Y/N. I told you she was mine.” Feeling content with his actions, Shigaraki walks back to the truck with his hands in his pockets.

Dabi listened to his boss's words to Overhaul and got slightly worried when he heard Shigaraki’s possessiveness toward you. Shigaraki knows that you and Dabi slept together, so why hasn’t he removed Dabi’s arms if he truly felt that way?

One thing was for certain: Dabi didn’t want to find out.

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