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coffee-colored-hopeless-romantic · 1 year

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My New Addiction. Pt 1

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Yeah so I went very overboard with this and I think I’ll make a part 2 eventually. Def a slow burn mutual pining type thing.

Also lmk if the Spanish is off at all!!

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Octane x Fem!Reader

CW: mutual pining, s l o w burn, swearing,

You did it. You finally did it, you were a Legend! An Apex Legend! You worked your ass off and you made it, you were on the way to meet everyone and get settled into your new home. Yes you were nervous, you’re a fan of almost all the legends and now you were one of them, how could you NOT be nervous? You breathe in and out as the momentum slows and you realize that you’ve arrived. The door gets opened by the driver and you exit, your bags already being taken up to your room.

As you were lead to the main area where everyone was gathered, you heard music and chatter before you got there. Everyone got quiet when you entered and the first one to say something was none other than Mirage.

“Hey hey! There’s the new gal! Welcome to our uni-un- special group! I’m Elliot, also known as Mirage.” He takes a little bow and suddenly another one of him wraps his arm around himself. It was confusing but you laugh nonetheless at his greeting.

Soon Ajay came up and shook your hand, smiling. “Hey now, welcome to da family! I’m Lifeline on da field but you can call me Ajay. What’s ya name?” You smile back, shaking her hand. Thee Lifeline, she’s literally so iconic and you’re just buddies with her suddenly. It was hard to maintain composure. “I’m Y/n! Nice to meet everyone!” You say cheerfully.

Fuse hollers out “and she’s a looker! What a deal!” The typical thing Fuse would say, soon being nudged by his own partner Bloodhound. That earned a chuckle from the one eyed Aussie and a kiss was placed on the masked hunter’s temple in apology. You thought they were flirtatious with each other but didn’t know they were actually together!

You went down the line of greetings until Ajax sighed and looked visibly annoyed. “Now where is that fool? I told him ta show up! SILVA YA BETTA GET YA ASS OVA HERE RIGHT NOW!” She shouted, soon enough you all hear distant mechanical sounds at a hurried pace. “Sorry Che! Sorry! Got a little carried away with the livestream! Did I miss the new guy?” He asked absentmindedly as he entered the room, everyone basically just gestures towards you and he soon looked over himself. “Oh! Hola! Welcome welcome! I’m Octavio! Nice to meet you, chica!” He walked over and greeted you personally, taking off his goggles revealing his eyes to you. He doesn’t reveal his face online or during the matches so you hadn’t seen his face before. What you did see though, was extremely attractive.

The evening started to liven up, as you were shown to your room and got to change. Wraith, who you came to know as Renee, told you about the welcome party they were throwing for you at the bar they go to. It was a special bar exclusively for the legends and higher ups in the industry to keep from getting bombarded with fans, paparazzi and onlookers. It was the best place for them to unwind other than their personal quarters. You nod and decide to change into something a little nicer. A form fitting top, with a loose sweater over it and some jeans. Nothing fancy but it was nicer than your typical outfit.

First thing you see was Elliott, Loba, Octavio and Natalie (Wattson) on the dance floor having a ball. They were tearing it up and once Loba caught sight of you she rushed over and dragged you to join. “Come on beautiful! You’re the guest of honor tonight! Want something to drink?” She asks as she pulls you into the group of friends dancing about.

You nod and tell her to get something strong but fruity and she just winks and says ‘leave it to me’ and waltzed off to the bar. A few songs and drinks in, you were feeling pretty loose, you were sitting in a booth with Ajay, Octavio, Renee, Loba and Elliott. They kind of already inserted themselves as your clique for now until they all get to know you and you basically choose yourself. You couldn’t complain though, you were enjoying every moment of this and as the night went on, the more comfortable you got. Not to mention you got to see Octavio’s full face for most of the night and holy hell he was attractive. You already had a crush on the daredevil but now seeing his face, his smile, his eyes. Your heart melted, you tried extremely hard not to stare at the man, failing and getting caught a few times. The girls were quick yo notice and once Octavio left the table to go to the bathroom, Loba immediately leaned over.

“Someone’s got an eye on the speedster hm?” She grinned, chin on a hand, leaning closer onto the table. Your face flushed red and you attempted to deny it but everyone already knew. Ajay not understanding the attraction but she didn’t judge. He was also basically her brother so it was weird for her to see him in that light in any way.

The rest of the night went great, nothing crazy happened. Just a party and getting to know a few of the legends you’ll be fighting and fighting along side.

About a month or so passes by and it was your first time to be in a duos match with Octane. He knocked on your door early in the morning already hyper. You groggily open the door and see him bouncing a leg while he waited. “What’s up Tavi?” You ask through a yawn, he grinned and handed you a coffee he had just gotten. “Here! It’s got an extra shot in it, gotta make sure you can keep up with me! Don’t want you falling behind, besides we gotta kick ass today and get a win! It’s our first time getting paired up!”

You couldn’t help but smile at him, he was more excited than you thought he would’ve been, not that you thought he was gonna be excited in the first place but it was nice to know he was looking forward to fighting with just the two of you. You had been in trios together and he was as chaotic as you’d imagine. Rushing in. Losing sight of him entirely. Him leading squads to you. All the fun stuff Octane does. One thing though was you’d never actually used his jump pad. You have done your best to avoid that, you didn’t know what it was. You could drop out of the airship fine so it wasn’t the height that bothered you, you weren’t sure as to why you didn’t want to fly off that thing.

“Thanks Tavi, we’ll do great today.” You take a sip of the slightly stronger coffee that was gifted to you with a hum. “Mmm, delicious. Wanna come in? I was just gonna start making some food.” You offer and he shrugs. “Cant turn down a free meal can I?” He walked inside your little place with you and plopped himself onto a chair, leg bouncing as he sat. He really could just never keep still. As you were cooking and making conversation a few other legends come to the door, Octane opening it for you while you had your hands full.

A few familiar voices chime in, saying good morning and good luck. You heard Ramya nudge her way in. “Heyy newbie! How’s it goin? Wanted to see if you wanted to make a bet with me ya?” You had been warned about Ramya’s bets and stakes. You squint your eyes with a grin, brimming with curiosity. “Depends on what the bet is. Shoot.” She chuckled and placed both hands on her hips. “If my team wins, you gotta do something for us for a week. If you win, vise versa. Easy.” You raise your eyebrow and look over at Octavio, he’s smirking. Always up for a challenge. “HahHAH!” He laughs loudly and wraps an arm around you. “WHEN we win, be sure not to be sore losers.”

You sigh in defeat as they leave, now the stakes were higher. You didn’t want to do things for Ramya and Ajay for a week! Let alone knowing that Octavio would literally never let you live it down. You look over at the green haired daredevil as he was eating the simple breakfast you had made. “Tavi, we gotta win now.” He chuckled and looked at you. “If we lose, you owe me a kiss.” You owed him what now? Your face must’ve said the same thing because he smirked. “Good incentive huh?” He teased. You just sipped your coffee with a gaze. “Maybe I don’t wanna win now.” You say softly, kind of hoping he heard but also not. He did though and his eyebrow quirked. He licked his lips, getting a little speck of food off. “Well well, don’t threaten me with a good time, Señorita.” God he was hot. You were no stranger to getting distracted by him during matches, he was always laying down casual flirts to you but you assumed that was towards most people, like how Elliott flirts with everyone.

Wasn’t long til the match began. Octavio was laying it on thick, if you had slipped up or got knocked he would wink and say things like;

“Wow someone really wants that kiss.”

“Come on, Chica. I know you want to kiss me but this is a bit much.”

“Should I kiss you now so you keep up?”

All of it was NOT helping you with this ordeal. Soon enough though you hear the announcement of

3 REMAINING SQUADS.

You take a breath and heal up from the last fight you just finished, looking at Octane with a grin. “Hey we might actually win this thing!” You say excitedly. He nods and snaps a selfie with you. “Maybe you should kiss me if we win. How ‘bout that speedster?” You tease and he laughs a bit. “Like I said before. Don’t threaten me with a good time, hermosa.”

You cocked your head a bit, asking what that meant and he ignored you. As he ran off to find the last couple squads. You roll your eyes and follow in suit. All and all you didn’t win and Ramya and Ajey had, they were cheering and happily teasing you two for just barely losing. If Octane hadn’t rushed in when Ramya was downed he wouldn’t have gotten himself killed. You sighed and made your way back to the ship to return home. Octavio returning soon enough himself.

It was awkwardly silent between you two as the whole group returned, you both walked towards the winning duo, who both has smiles plastered onto their faces. “Don’t worry mates, we don’t have anything planned just yet. Enjoy your freedom for now!” Ramya patted both you and Octavio’s back and pushed you along. You two chuckled and you sighed a bit “I’m so nervous to find out what they have in mind for us.” Octavio shrugged and looked over at you “Eh I wouldn’t stress about it, Cariño. Whatever they come up with won’t be the worst thing.” You look at him, yet another nickname you don’t understand.

You don’t even bother trying to ask because you figured he wouldn’t tell you anyways. You sigh once again and rub the back of your neck. “You ok? Sore or something?” He asks with concern, looking right where you just massaged. “Yeah kind of. My neck is bugging me.” You admit and soon you feel two hands on your shoulder and where the base of your neck is. You let out a breath of relief as you started to feel the knots surface and loosen under his touch. Surprisingly he was really good at massages. You let out soft sounds of pleasure due to the tense muscles finally being worked on. “Oh my gosh Tavi..” you whisper out. What you didn’t see it the pink flush under his mask, the sounds he’s getting out of you was getting to him, his core beginning to heat up and his shorts slowly getting tighter, he felt dirty and a little ashamed his body reacted to something so innocent.

Soon enough he stopped and chuckled a bit “Yeahhh I kind of got magic hands Y’know?” He wiggled his fingers by his face, smirking in a silly way along with it, making you laugh a bit. There was a moment where you both kind of just looked at each other in silence, you catch him glance at your lips and back onto your eyes, you did the same thing. You heart skips a little when you see him leaning towards you, only to be interrupted by Elliott coming literally out of nowhere. “HEY! You guys almost had it! Good game.” He held out two fists for you guys to bump knuckles and you jump from the sudden voice and happily give him what he was lookin’ for. Can’t leave him hangin like that. He smiled and put his hands on his hips. “Well what you guys have planned? Anything fun? Can I come? I’m not doing anything and if you need some company I’d love to join you… I’m really bored.” He admitted his true intentions that he just wants some buddies to hang with and you both chuckle.

“We don’t have anything specific planned, just chillin until we gotta go do something.” You typically had a conference with paparazzi and interviewers after games but today it was scheduled for later so you’d all go get dinner afterwards. Elliott shrugged a bit and the three of you just hung out, Elliott being the metaphorical ‘cock block’ for Octavio. He unintentionally stayed close to you throughout the hangout session before you guys split off from Elliott to head to each of your rooms. Octavio sighed a bit and ran his hand through his hair “Well chica, as sad as it is we must depart from each other to go get fancier than I’d like.” He chuckled a bit before taking your hand and placing a kiss on your knuckles. “See ya!” He winked and ran off towards his room.

Once he was behind his closed door he ran his hands over his face, sighing. A lot was going through his mind, well more than usual. His attraction to you was gonna get him in trouble if he wasn’t careful. He tried to distract himself and actually make himself presentable for this press conference thingie that he hardly enjoyed going to. Only thing he enjoyed was his fans seeing him and interacting with him. At least he would see you dolled up right?

Oh God. He was gonna see you dolled up.

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Next part.↪️

#fanfic #my writing #x reader #x y/n #octane x reader #octane #apex legends #apex #apex octane #apex legends octane #octavio silva #apex octane x reader #apex x reader #slow burn #mutua pining #flirtatious #apex legends x reader #apex octavio silva

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themelancholyhill · 1 year

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I haven’t had the courage to send you an ask for a while. Part of it is because one of my mutuals-turned-irl friend told me someone sent her an ask on anon and the blog url actually came up for a moment as she posted her answer. It was most likely a glitch but still, i’d like to be anon to you for as long as possible, i think it’s better this way. Whenever i see your reblogs on my dash i always want to send you an ask just to see how you are.

So how are you really? Tell me.

I’m not doing well…i’ve hurt someone i care very much about very deeply. I had to cut her out of my life, in a way that i know will scar her for a long time. I knew where her vulnerability was and i used it, not to hurt her intentionally, but i didn’t see another way for us to continue our friendship. She is an online friend. I’ve had quite a bit of issues with people i’ve met over the internet that i don’t know if befriending someone in this way is the best thing for me mentally. It’s weird, coz i’ve met some wonderful people (like you❤️) and my mutual/irl friend but there are also things and people i’ve experienced online that i’d rather not remember. Have you had something similar like this happen to you online?

Or is this just life and i’ve just been too sheltered and safe all this time?

V✖️

Don't worry about wanting to remain anonymous. If you feel like it's the best option then I won't pressure you to reveal your username either here or on any other platform. Not that I was going to or it means that I don't care if you show it or not, but just go with whatever suits your fancy. We've been talking for this long like this and it's a sign that it's working, so keep it up since it's your best option.

I've met wonderful people (you included, of course, and you being anonymous sets you apart delightfully) and I've met some of them which is nice and all! They're a couple of online friends whom I wish I could meet irl, but despite living in the same country, we live in different areas so it's tricky to meet and hang out. Idk, I might organise something w one of them whom I know for more than 10 years!

However, I met a guy online a month ago and we'd decided to meet irl. Here's the thing, he's nice and all but he's got this tendency of noticing every detail and he'd shown jealous behavior despite us not going out at all. We met at my uni campus cause my mom doesn't want me to exceed this parameter and he was like: "that's not fair for me, I want us to go somewhere else!"

I told him that maybe I'd get to do that some day and he left me on seen—it's been a month now!

I'm not fazed by it at all, but coming from someone my age, it just disappoints me!

Apart from that, I'm doing well. I've seen Ray on couple of occasions. He came off of the same classroom I study in. He saw me and that was it. How weird is it to see someone you care so much about become a complete stranger?! I'm slowly coping with this situation, and it's tedious!

As for your situation, I solely believe that you did it because it was the best thing to do. Sometimes, harsh decisions have got to be made. I also believe that our online space should be safe for us to just breathe, and if someone is there to suck all the air, well then, it's best to cut tights w them!

I'm super glad to hear from you, I've been reblogging stuff that are rather random, but know for sure that you cross my mind very very often!

I hope that by the time you read this you'll be feeling much much better!

#asks #V✖

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the-iceni-bitch · 3 years

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A Birthday Gift

Pairing: Nomad!Steve x fem-Reader

Word Count: 5665 (I know, I know)

Summary: The nomad crew have been holed up with you for months and tensions are high. Nat, being an unrepentant pot stirrer, decides to arrange a pleasant birthday surprise for you.

Warnings: Explicit language, explicit sexual content, explicit descriptions of consensual violence, SMUT! PORN! 18+!

A/N: Hello my fellow hoes and sluts! My birthday is today and it has me in some kind of mood, so I hunkered down and blasted out this fic. @stargazingfangirl18‘s lovely Tree Trimming fic has my holes quivering for some hot Nomad sex, so please sit back and enjoy my birthday present to all of you!

You had always hated your birthday.

Fortunately, Nat was completely willing to take your mind off it with a good sparring match. The snow was falling heavy outside of the large windows on the side of the gym, but the minor exertion was keeping you pleasantly warm. You’d been on the mat for almost an hour, but you still couldn’t seem to get your mind to focus.

Of course, it didn’t help when Rogers came in, glowering, to work the bags, giving you a wary look before he settled into his routine.

Nat and the rest of the team had been with you for almost 3 months now. When she had called you after the events in Berlin, to arrange a potential safehouse for her and her compatriots, you of course offered to have them join you at your isolated lodge on the Snæfellsnes peninsula. You were as off the grid as they come, and with the help of your Wakandan friends, still able to provide the modern creature comforts you were sure they had become accustomed to at the Avengers compound.

You had missed Nat, after all. It had been almost 7 years since you last saw her, but the grin she gave you when they landed in the early Autumn made it seem like she’d never left. You got to know everyone else over the months as well. Sam and you bonded quickly after you introduced him to Aquavit and spent the next 2 days helping him slowly move back to solid foods. Vision of course took everything that happened in stride, and while you couldn’t say you were friends, you had developed a mutual respect for each other. Wanda took longer to warm up (understandable after everything she had been through) but when you told her about the time you had spent in Sokovia, she quickly came out of her shell, and the two of you would often stay up through the night reminiscing about your homes. Even Barnes had softened once he got a look at your weapons room and you took it out to the Fjord to test out some next gen tech Shuri had sent you.

The only problem was Rogers.

No matter what you tried, it seemed that every time you got near him his hackles went up. You could feel him watching you constantly, and whenever you met his gaze, he would simply clench his jaw and stalk off like a cat.

“He’s just overprotective.” Nat always said. “He’s a big papa bear protecting his cubs. He’ll warm up.”

You snapped back to the present as Vis and Wanda wandered into the gym chatting idly. She had convinced him to join her out in the snow for a brisk hike, and was now laughing lightly as she brushed a dusting of soft flakes off his shoulders. Bucky was working his way down from the weights level, patting his neck dry with a towel. You heard the pounding on the bags stop, and glanced over to see Rogers unwrapping his hands as he stared at you, but this time he didn’t break eye contact when you met his gaze.

Those deep blue eyes disarmed you, and you lost your concentration for a split second. Nat seized her opportunity and crawled up your back, wrapping he legs around your neck and shoulders to try to get you into a submissive position. You tried to regain your composure, but your instincts kicked in for just a moment, and when you drove yourself back into the mat to break her hold, you landed quite a bit harder than you intended and thought you heard a snap as she gasped out in pain.

“Shit, Nat you good?” You scrambled onto your knees and looked at your friend with concern. Out of the corner of your eye, you saw Rogers striding over, jaw clenched and brow furrowed. Vis and Wanda stopped their conversation to glance over and Bucky moved quickly to intercept his best friend with a hand on his chest.

Nat broke the tension with a laugh, and everyone in the room relaxed. “God, Y/N, guess you’re still an aggro bitch. I though I might’ve had you for once.”

“Jesus, Nat. I’m sorry, lemme grab you some ice. Anything broken?”

“Don’t think so, just a bruised ego. Look at you, you haven’t even broken a sweat.”

You tossed a pack to her from the freezer, along with her typical post spar electrolyte drink. She gave you a wink as she pressed the pack to her ribs, and you could only shake your head at her.

“Steve, you wanna take over for me?” She said to the large man who was now leaning against one of the windows, only half listening as Barnes tried to distract him, while glaring at you.

You both snapped your heads around to stare at her and started protesting over each other while she grinned back and forth between you.

“That’s probably not a great idea…”

“Don’t want to hurt her…”

“Oh my god, you two are ridiculous. Y/N, you obviously still have to work out your birthday issues, and Steve, you’ve been complaining for the past 3 weeks that me and Buck are getting too predictable.”

“Y/N, it’s your birthday? We should bake you a cake!” Wanda exclaimed, always the little ray of sunshine.

“That’s ok Wand, please don’t.”

“Should we perhaps sing?” Vision was now adding his two cents to the discussion.

“No singing. Thank you, so much, for that, Nat.”

“She’s right Rogers, you’ve been looking pretty bored during our sessions, change of pace might be good for you.”

While you were eternally grateful to Bucky for getting the topic off of your birthday, you really didn’t think Rogers was going to go for this.

“Fine, we’ll give it a shot.”

You looked at him with surprise, but gave a shrug and nodded. You definitely still needed something to take your mind off the day. You loved Nat, but always felt the need to hold back during your sessions, and it might be nice to take the safety off.

Nat looked like the cat that ate the canary for some unknown reason, as she giggled and clapped her hands before setting down onto one of the stools to observe. Bucky looked relieved as he leaned back against the wall, chugging the contents of his water bottle. Wanda and Vis went back to their flirty conversation, content to let you two do your own thing.

You unzipped your hoody and threw it to the side, stretching your neck and bouncing on the balls of your feet to loosen up. Rogers looked you over, eyes lingering over your tattoos that you realized he’d never seen since most of them were easily covered by a long sleeve shirt. He pulled his own sweatshirt over his head, and you had a hard time not taking a second to appreciate just how good his torso looked in a simple grey tee.

“Jesus, you two, just get to it.”

The look you shot Nat was pure poison. You weren’t sure what her game was, but you’d be sure to break out the vodka later tonight and get it out of her.

You squared up with the captain, keeping a loose stance on the balls of your feet while he brought up his fists and shrugged his shoulders.

His first strike seemed sluggish, and you slapped it aside easily, frowning at him. He shuffled forward, throwing a few more jabs that you also dodged. Was he holding back on you?

The next few shots he tried to take all but confirmed it; he was pulling his punches. You ducked around them easily, starting to get frustrated. You stepped inside his reach and delivered three quick strikes to his abdomen, followed by an open-handed push to the center of his chest, causing him to take two steps backwards.

His eyes narrowed at you. He was just hoping to get Nat and Buck off his back. Nat had been trying to get him to interact with you for months, but there was something about you that set off warning bells in his head. He trusted Nat and Nat trusted you, which should have been good enough, but he couldn’t get over the thought that there was something dangerous about you that he couldn’t figure out. He’d hoped that a quick spar would appease Nat and get whatever was bugging him about you out of his system, but he had expected you to be on Nat’s level of physicality. The contemptuous way you slapped his blows aside, and the way you got under his guard fast, only made him more wary.

You saw him adjust his stance and tucked in his arms, and gave him a small smirk as you stepped back and raised your fists again.

He moved forward quickly this time, throwing a quick combo of punches aimed at your head and torso and trying to get his arms around you for a hold. You still dodged his strikes easily and when he tried to put you in a hold, you delivered a swift knee to the juncture of his waist on his left side, dancing back again.

His long hair had fallen into is eyes at this point, and when he straightened back up, the look of appraisal he gave was laced with frustration.

Your breathing was still even and relaxed, and Nat had been right, you hadn’t broken a sweat at all in the past 45 minutes. You loosely rolled one tattooed shoulder and gave him a grin, practically begging him to try again.

He clenched his jaw and rushed you. You kept dodging his blows or batting them aside but when he brought his foot around suddenly you moved a little too slow and felt it glance off your cheekbone. He took advantage of your brief surprise and moved behind you whip fast, wrapping one arm around your neck as he braced the other around your right shoulder and he tried to force you to the ground. You sprung your legs off the mat, raising them above your waist before swinging them back down as you got your left hand behind his head and grabbed the back of his tee, then used your momentum to fling him over your shoulders and toss him 15 feet across the room.

He shot up fast and turned back to with a look of complete shock on his face as he crouched into a protective stance. He stared at you like that for a beat before clenching his jaw and straightening up, rolling his head to right.

You followed his line of sight, perplexed. Bucky had jolted off of the wall and looked ready for a fight, flicking his gaze between you and Rogers. Wanda was staring at you with surprise, but was still relaxed. Vis looked at everyone around the room in confusion, trying to understand where the sudden tension had come from. The only person who seemed unfazed by what happened was Nat, all doe eyed innocence as she sipped her drink, not making eye contact with you or Rogers.

Poor Sam chose this moment to wander in. “Hey, Y/N, I heard it’s your b-day. You ready for me to drink you under… What happened?”

“Fuck’s sake Nat, you didn’t tell them.” You hissed at her.

“It didn’t really seem important, Y/N. Besides, it’s your secret.”

“Not a secret Nat. Jesus.”

“Someone want to tell me what the fuck I missed?” Sam was still flicking his gaze around the room, trying to figure out what was happening.

“Y/N just threw Steve across the room like a ragdoll.” Bucky said.

“Oh, word? Interesting.” Sam said.

“Someone want to explain this situation to me, slowly?” Rogers was looking murderously between you and Nat, and you honestly could have killed her yourself.

“Oh, did everyone not know about Y/N’s brain implants?”

All of you looked at Vision when he piped up, and he got a grin on his face like he had just solved an especially difficult puzzle.

“Baby, I think it’s safe to say only you and Nat knew.” Wanda whispered to him.

“But wasn’t that why we came here? Y/N has been hiding from multiple governments for years and her expertise has been very helpful in shielding us from both the United Nations and Stark industries.”

“Yeah, honey, just assume that you’re the only one who knows what you’re talking about.” Wanda said exasperatedly.

“Oh, well then, Y/N was part of an experimental program run by HYDRA under the guise of SHIELD during the 1990s where adolescents received brain implants designed by Dr. Emil Zola to increase sensory perception, decrease pain receptors, and specifically, maximize the efficiency of fast twitch muscle fibers via the phosphagen system, allowing use of these muscles for longer periods of time without negative effects. This was of course after multiple failed trials with a new super soldier serum.

“The program’s graduates were deployed at the beginning of the second Gulf War, purportedly to hunt terrorists, but were also used as HYDRA’s own assassination squad in the eastern hemisphere. The program was discontinued at the end of 2007 and it was thought that all the graduates were culled, but Y/N simply disappeared on mission at the Wakandan border. I admit, I was a bit surprised when she greeted us as she’s presumed dead by most intelligence agencies, but I thought her history was the reason we chose this location. Did I miss anything?” Vis looked at you with genuine interest.

“No that’s pretty much it, thanks.” You said flatly, running a hand over your face.

“See, not that big of a deal.” Nat shrugged.

“Well, Vis and I are going to head to bed.” Wanda chirped up, looking nervously between you, Nat, and the two super soldiers who were now staring at you again. She ushered Vision out of the room quickly and shushed him as he tried to ask if he had done something wrong.

“You really didn’t think this is something I might have wanted to know Nat?” Steve had now turned his attention back to your friend, murder written all over his face.

“No, Steve. Like I said, this is Y/N’s business and it changes literally nothing about how much I trust her. I can’t help it that you got your panties in a bunch over some perceived threat when I told you over and over again that I would willingly put my life in her hands in any situation.”

“You should have told them Nat.” You shook your head at her. She was still playing some sort of game, you could tell, but you didn’t know what.

“Ok, fine, I’m sorry. I just didn’t think you wanted the drama, or to have Barnes look at you like some little lost lamb.”

“Aw geez, Buck, stop looking at me like that or I’m going to punch you. I’m fine.”

“Ahm, sorry.” Bucky’s look of overwhelming sympathy would have been heartbreaking if it had been directed at anybody but you, and you really couldn’t handle that right now. “I’m here to talk if you ever need it.”

“Thanks, Barnes.”

“Besides, you and Steve are both in desperate need of a good fuck, and I thought an impromptu discovery like this would give you the push you need.”

And there it was.

“Well, I’m going to have to make it a rain check on those birthday drinks Y/N, look at the time, it’s… 6 PM. Let’s go Barnes.” Sam was now looking everywhere except at you and Rogers as he did his best to drag Bucky, who was doubled over crying with laughter, out of the gym.

You and Steve glared at Nat as she just sat there grinning, looking overly pleased with herself. A flush was creeping up Rogers neck as his fists tightened and loosened. You could see his jaw clenching under his beard and the tendons on his neck stand out in a look of absolute fury.

“You are such a meddling bitch, Romanoff.” You growled at her. Sure, it had been a while, but you were plenty capable of taking care of yourself, which you had told her after she plied you with three bottles of good Russian vodka.

“Yep.” She hopped off her stool and tossed her ice pack into the freezer. “I’m gonna leave you two to it. Talk, fight, fuck, do something. Your sexual tension is bringing down the vibe.”

She easily dodged the kettle bell you lobbed at her head with a laugh as she scurried out of the gym, closing the door behind her.

After about a minute of uncomfortable silence, you and Rogers turned back to each other. His face was no longer bright red as he looked at you, but you noticed something new in his gaze. His pupils were dilated as he peered at you through the hair that had fallen into his eyes. His breathing was deeper as he stepped closer and looked down at you. You were quite a bit taller than Nat, but still only came up to his eyes. He had moved his gaze to your chest, which was rising and falling in a slightly faster rhythm as he took you in, before moving it to your lips, then back up to your eyes.

“Wanna talk?” he asked.

“Nope.”

“Fight?”

“OK.”

You both took several steps back, retreating to your corners. Some unspoken agreement passed between you and Steve ripped off his t-shirt and sweatpants, until he was down to only his boxer briefs. You removed your sweats as well until you stood there in your sports bra and boy shorts. Neither of you examined whether you were doing this to increase your range of motion or for some other, hungrier reason.

You gazed at each other for a beat, drinking each other in. Steve rolled his broad shoulders and neck, bending from side to side briefly as you watched the muscles in his abdomen tighten and relax as he stretched. You reached your arms over your head before folding yourself over to wrap your arms around the backs of your thighs, twisting yourself to loosen your back muscles and feeling his eyes on you the whole time.

After straightening back up, you each gave each other a swift nod then rushed forward wordlessly.

You managed to gain the upper hand first when you vaulted over him as he dove at you, wrapping one arm around his throat as you carried your momentum and brought him to the ground, coiling your legs around his torso like a snake and stretching his right arm out with yours, pinning it in place.

He reached his left arm over his shoulder and punched you in the face.

You let go of him with a grunt and rolled up quickly, but he was able to get behind you and grabbed your left wrist with his right hand, hauling you over his shoulder while his left arm wrapped around your thigh and he drove you backwards into the mat, knocking the air out of your lungs before rolling over to try to pin you.

You got one leg between the two of you and drove your foot into the center of his chest, sending him flying across the room to crash into the free weights. You didn’t give him a chance to recover before charging back into him driving a fist into first his ribs, then his hip and causing him to buckle over before you wrapped one knee around his chest and rolled forward, slamming him into the ground so hard the floor cracked as you went to straddle him.

He caught your knee and carried you into a kneeling position before throwing you into the sandbags with enough force to knock one loose. You landed heavily and grabbed a kettle bell, whipping at him. He barely dodged it as he covered his head and it glanced off his forearm, giving you enough time to rush forward.

He caught you in the center of the mat and twisted you over him until you were pinned; one of your wrists in each of his hands above your head, legs wrapped around your thighs forcing them apart as he pressed his whole body weight into you.

You stopped struggling finally and stared up at him. You both were breathing heavily and covered in sweat. Steve’s hair was falling into his eyes, which were now lust blown as he stared at your lips. You could feel the muscles in his torso twitching against you as he held you in place.

He suddenly released your wrists without a word, and brought one hand behind your head to pull your mouth to his hungrily. His tongue ran along your lower lip and you opened yourself up to him, sighing into his mouth.

His other hand worked its way down your back as his legs loosened their hold on yours and he pressed your hips into his. You felt him start to grind his hardened cock into your mound and let out a low moan. He growled into your lips before releasing your head and started to kiss and bite his way down your neck, drawing soft whimpers from you as he did.

When he reached the tops of your breasts he pulled away from you suddenly to skim one hand up your abdomen before hooking three fingers under the edge of your sports bra and slowly drawing it over your head, eyes boring into yours as he did so. Once his obstacle had been removed, he nuzzled his face into the valley between your tits before gently sucking a bruise there as his beard scratched against your skin. He then moved his mouth to first your right nipple, then your left; rolling them between his teeth and tongue as you pressed your chest further into his face with a gasp.

He continued his downward journey, dipping his tongue into your navel before he reached the top of your shorts. He slowly drew them down your thighs and off until you were laying underneath him, fully bare and wanton, your cunt clenching around nothing as he stared up at you, resting his chin on your lower abdomen as his eyes asked you a silent question and you nodded, almost imperceptibly.

He drew your knees over his shoulders and pulled you down until his beard was flush against your mound. He nuzzled into the soft hair there before kissing the inside of your thighs slowly, his beard scratching the soft skin there as he gently ran the edge of his teeth up to your juncture then back down at an agonizingly slow pace. When you felt him breathe against your entrance, you wrapped one hand in his hair and moaned, and when his tongue found your clit you screamed and arched your back into him.

His tongue slowly circled your clit as he brought up his right hand and brushed his pointer and middle fingers through your arousal slowly, before inserting one finger into your pussy at a deliciously slow pace. You felt him smile against you as you moaned, wrapping your thighs around his neck as he moved in and out, curling his finger against that soft, spongy spot over and over again before adding another finger.

His tongue had stopped drawing it’s slow circles and was now pressing and releasing against you at faster intervals, causing your breath to hitch in your chest as you writhed against his face. He held a third finger at the edge of your entrance and when you pressed yourself into it, he inserted it into your canal, stretching you so good you let out a thin whine. He shook his head back and forth quickly but gently, adding a brand new sensation before he began to suck on your clit.

All the breath rushed out of you at once as you brought your second hand to press his head further into you. His fingers were fucking into you fast now and you felt the tension in your abdomen building as he alternated between sucking and licking at the small bundle of nerves. When he finally latched on, at the same time he curled all three fingers against your g-spot, you came apart around him, screaming his name as your thighs wrapped around his head like a vise as every muscle in your back tightened, thrusting your torso off the mat violently before you sank back down, relaxing as Steve helped you ride it out.

His name was the first thing either of you had said in almost 15 minutes, and he didn’t want to break the silence now. He was afraid if either of you spoke, you’d break the spell that seemed to have settled over you. Instead of saying anything, he gently pulled you down until you were straddling his waist, then nuzzled his face into the juncture between your neck and shoulder before resting his forehead on yours and staring into your eyes.

You looked back at him, blinking slowly as you moved your hands down to his hips and slipping your fingers under the edge of his boxer briefs. You slipped them over his hips slowly, and you felt his legs shifting in between yours as he moved himself to help you remove them, never breaking eye contact with you. You matched each other’s breathing as he shifted his hips and lined himself up at your entrance, his eyes giving you a pleading look. You shifted your hips closer to him, and he slowly breached you with his tip, closing his eyes as he did so and letting out a low moan from the back of his throat. He started thrusting into you slowly, trying not to collapse on top of you as he held himself back.

You brought your face up to his and slowly kissed him, gently drawing your tongue along the outside of his lips. The hand you didn’t have buried in his hair moved to his lower back and pressed him into you further, and you softly whispered against his mouth “Please…”

He let out a feral growl and settled his full weight on top of you as his hands moved from their supportive positions. One moved underneath you to hold you against him as he fucked into you fast, the other buried itself in your hair as he wrenched your head back and ran his teeth over your throat, nipping at the small hollow at its base. His hand on your back tilted your hips so each drive of his brought him flush against your clit, and you started breathlessly whimpering as he drove into you at a punishing speed.

Your second orgasm came almost without warning. You felt yourself flutter around him one moment when he suddenly tilted your hips just right and you were seeing stars, your body spasming as an uncontrollable wave of pleasure crashed over you repeatedly.

Steve still wasn’t finished though. He gave you a kiss like a starving man before pulling out of you suddenly. You groaned at the loss before he flipped you over fast and slammed back into you, causing you to let out a cry as his tip kissed your cervix.

He maneuvered you into the position he wanted quickly; one knee hooked over his leg and brought up close to your side with your other leg stretched behind you. He brought one arm underneath you to wrap a massive hand around your throat while the other tangled itself in your hair and drew your head back enough for him to kiss you hard, shoving his tongue down your throat as he continued to drive into you.

You had another orgasm almost immediately. Your pussy was fluttering and clenching like crazy as your body almost vibrated with pleasure. Steve still wasn’t slowing down and you were having so much trouble catching your breath you were worried you were going to pass out. You couldn’t stop driving your hips back into him though, matching his pace and feeling the tension in your core begin to gather again. You rolled your eyes back in your head and let out a thin whimper as you moved a hand between your thighs, trying to gain some sort of control over your own pleasure before your brain short-circuited.

Steve ripped your fingers from your throbbing clit with a growl and replaced them with his own, drawing harsh circles around the overstimulated bundle as you gasped and whimpered. He moved the hand he had at your throat to cup your chin, and tugged at your bottom lip with his thumb. You opened your mouth to gently nip at the rough pad as you felt his hips start to stutter, and he when he bit into your shoulder harshly you let out a scream and came apart violently, shaking underneath him uncontrollably.

His own release was right behind yours, and you felt his hot spend coating your insides as you fluttered around him and he wordlessly roared into your ear. He collapsed on top of you, burying his face in your neck and breathing deeply as he moved his hand from your face to softly cup your breast, lazily rolling one nipple in between his fingers and you came down from your respective highs.

You felt him softening inside you as you started to untangle yourselves. He slowly pulled out and you let out a small sigh at the loss of him. You heard him groan as he caught the sight of his cum slowly leaking out of your swollen cunt, and he left a slow trail of kisses down your spine before gently turning you over.

You wrapped one hand around the back of his neck and pulled your face up to his, kissing him deeply as your other hand trailed through the hair on his chest before coming to rest on his abdomen. He rested his forehead against yours again as you both got your breathing under control, before he broke out in an absolutely sinful grin.

You both started laughing then, the previous tension completely broken as you buried your face in his neck and he held you close to him, shaking with laughter.

“Oh my god, I really did need a good fuck.” You said breathlessly, tears leaking down your cheeks.

“Yeah, well I’d say we shouldn’t give Nat the satisfaction of knowing she’s right but I doubt she wasn’t listening in this whole time.”

“Jesus, of course she was. She’ll never stop meddling now.”

He grunted in agreement before giving you a brief kiss to the top of your head, then you separated yourselves to stumble around and locate your clothes.

The gym was an absolute wreck. Aside from the crack in the floor, the weight racks had fallen over in a domino effect after you had kicked Steve into one and two of the sandbags were leaking everywhere.

You were both covered in bruises from the sparring session and the stiffness you always felt after overexertion seemed to have multiplied tenfold as you struggled to pull your sweats back on, groaning at how tight your muscles were. Steve seemed to be feeling it as well as he let out a hiss through his teeth when he pulled his sweatshirt back over his head.

Once you were both dressed, he stalked over to you like a cat and wrapped his arms around your waist and pulling you in for one more kiss.

“Guess we should go face the rest of them.” He said, resigned.

You groaned as he dragged you out of the gym, hand in hand, to endure what you were sure was going to be a chorus of cat calls and innuendos, but when the two of you arrived in the living area, it was just Nat curled up on the sofa, giving the two of you a satisfied smirk.

“Where is everyone?” You asked her, looking around to see if maybe they had moved into the kitchen.

Nat threw back her head and laughed. “Oh they all ran out into the snow once you two really got started. I don’t think I’ve ever seen anyone look as embarrassed as Bucky did in my entire life. He forgot his shoes.” She was crying with laughter.

“Outside, Nat, it’s freezing out there!” The sun had already gone down with how late in the year it was and once that happened, the temperature would drop severely.

“I told them but they couldn’t handle it. Bunch of prudes.”

“Yeah, while you sat here and listened, you pervert.” You and Steve started pulling on boots and coats to head out after them.

“I’m the pervert! While you two had the world’s loudest fuckfest less than 20 feet away from the rest of your housemates, hey!” You had thrown her coat at her face and she caught it to shrug around her shoulders. “They probably had to go out five miles before they weren’t able to hear you.”

Steve growled at her as he ripped the front door open and headed out with you on his heels.

“Oh, you’re welcome by the way! It sure would be nice to get some appreciation for your birthday gift, Y/N… shit.”

Steve had lobbed a snowball the size of a golden retriever at her that she barely dodged at the last minute, cursing under her breath.

Steve wrapped an arm around you as you headed out into the fields to find your poor housemates and apologize, nuzzling himself into your hair with a grin. “Happy birthday.” He murmured to you, giving you a quick kiss before ruining the moment by bellowing “Barnes, get your dumbass back here, you forgot your boots!”

You grinned at him, looking up at the sky where the borealis had started and thinking that maybe birthdays weren’t so bad after all.

#chris evans smut #smut #steve rogers #nomad steve #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers x you #steve rogers x y/n #writing

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insomniamamma · 3 years

Text

Safe: Ezra x f!reader w/Cee

A/n: What can I say? I'm hormonal and all my shit hurts and if I cannot get snuggles IRL then I will write something super soft and self-indulgent to make myself feel better. Part of the Prickle AU. Set sometime after Sacellum.

Warnings: Oh no! There's only one bed. Soft!Ezra. Language. Cee's best friend on The Pug is non-binary and also named after my little boy's favorite stuffy. Maybe the slightest bit of angst. But mostly super soft.

"You did this on purpose." "Right hand to Kevva, I did not. I asked for double occupancy and they must have misunderstood and--" "You don't have a right hand," "Let's go back to the reception desk," says Ezra, "We may be able to negotiate more appropriate accommodations." "Errgh," you groan. Reception had been a nightmare, three freighters worth of traffic trying to secure berths all at once. It was a lot of people. Too many for your liking. Cee was staying with Kit and their family. Kit and Cee had practically tackled each other right there on the dock, everyone else forgotten, walked away arm in arm. "We shove off in three cycles," Ezra hollered at her retreating back, and she flapped a dismissive hand at him. You had to smile. For three cycles Cee gets to be a normal teenager hanging out with her best friend without worrying about points and pulls and overhead costs and fuel margins. "I don't wanna go back down there," you say, "Too many people. I think twice the population of Falnost was waiting in that fucking line." You brush past him and into the suite. The ceilings are low and slightly curved and it feels strange to be under this much grav. The outer rings of Puggart Bench have something close to terra-normal gravity, but after so much time spent on little moons and worldlets, this much G feels weird and you have no desire to trudge back down to reception. "You sure?" Asks Ezra. "Yeah," you drop your day bag and press a hand to the mattress. "Look at the size of this thing. It's, like, five crash-couches wide. This seems above our pay grade." "They're overbooked," says Ezra, "We're paying the same points for the berth we should have gotten. I made sure of it. I can sleep in that recliner if--" "No." "No?" "Kevva, Ez, we're both adults," you say, "I think we can share a bed for a night without exploding."

Your suite has a real, honest-to-Goddess shower with a generous 15 minute timer. You scrub as fast as you can and then just let the water hit you, let the pressure pound on your tense back muscles until the chime sounds and the water cuts off. You towel off and dress, soft clothes you sleep in, and pad out into the main room. Ezra is reading, face far off and serious, and you just look at him for a minute, illuminated in the warm lamp-light, absorbed in his book, little furrow between his brows and then he looks up, all knowing smirk and dancing eyes, he's caught you staring. "Your turn, Ez," You say and turn your face away. Kevva. This man. You've been trying to keep things professional, but it's a losing battle. His flirtations make you flush, but he's never tried to push you, never tried to leverage the fact that it's his name on the ship's title, that you signed a contract, that you are junior-most crew. You feel safe with him. And, from your limited experience in the fringe, that is a miracle in itself.

Ezra sets his book aside and heads for the bathroom. You peel the sheets from the other side of the bed and settle in. There's a media player bolted to the wall, but you just want quiet. You switch off the lamp on your nightstand (we both have lamps, we both have a nightstand, how weird is that?) The sheets feel deliciously cool against your skin. To be clean and sleeping in clean sheets...if Heaven isn't like this Kevva's got some answering to do. Ezra sings in the shower. You're barely awake and you smile. Ezra can't carry a tune in a bucket, singing fringeling songs and reels, stories of mercs and pirates and ghosts and you drift off to the sound of him, the sound of the water running.

He sees you soft and loose and asleep. No rail-gun, no body armor, no thrower under your pillow. Your face slack, snoring slightly. You've kicked out of the blankets and lay curled as if chilled. "Hey Artichoke," he murmurs, pulls the blankets up and tucks them around you, "Let's get you warm, yeah?"

Ezra wakes. Bleared red numbers of the clock saying that this is still the deepest ditch of local night. Ezra is warm and confused. He feels you pressed against him, your chest to his back, an arm hooked around his middle, your legs entwined with his. You've sought him out in your sleep and folded yourself around him, your breath slow and steady against his nape. Ezra's eyes prick with tears. He can't remember the last time he's been held like this. He's had lovers. He has payed for sex on the less reputable Benches of the Great Arm, but for someone to hold him? For someone to touch him without payment, without trying to press some advantage, gain some kind of leverage, without priming him for the inevitable backstab? He is overwhelmed. He tries to wriggle away from you, but your arm just tightens around him. "...fixed the transponder," you mutter against his neck, "told you we didn't need...told you..." He pats your arm and relaxes against you. "Okay, Artichoke, okay, sweetheart. Go back to sleep."

You wake enfolded, Ezra's good arm wrapped around you. You feel the steady beat of his heart beneath your ear, the slow sussurration of his breath, the snores that catch in his throat and turn to murmurs, the rise and fall of his chest beneath your cheek. You've tucked yourself against him in your sleep. Your hand rests on his sternum. Oh Kevva. What are you doing? You go rigid. Your first impulse is to wrestle out of his hold, take one of the blankets and install yourself in the recliner that you wouldn't let Ezra take, but part of you wants to stay right here in the combined warmth of your bodies, feeling his breath, his heart, his calloused palm spread against your shoulder. You shift, making the smallest effort to pull yourself away and his arm tightens further, a low, sleepy chuckle reverberates through his chest. "Hi Ez," "Hi." He strokes the pad of his thumb along the exposed curve of your shoulder. "I'll get up," you say, even as he shifts and cups the back of your head in his palm, tucking you closer. "You don't have to," he says, voice rough with sleep. This gesture pricks at your heart. Coming up on Falnost has made you hard, guarded, there has been precious little gentleness in your life, pulling rocks out of the parched ground since you were big enough to lift a shovel. Learned to fight and shoot to chase water-thieves from the homestead. He strokes the back of your head like one might pet a skittish cat and your heart squeezes. "Ezra?" You hate how small your voice sounds, you hate the uncertainty you hear there, "Are we okay?" "Of course we are," he says, "Why wouldn't we be?" "I wrapped around you like a Bueller's world python and I did it in my sleep-" "The wrapping was mutual-" "You're not mad or uncomfortable or anything?" He laughs again, gentle huff of breath against the crown of your head. "Mad about waking with you in my arms? The day I'm mad about that you can just shoot me in the head and send me to Kevva because I will surely have lost my ever-loving mind." You smile against his skin and relax some, your hand unfists and you curl your arm around his soft belly, feel his breath hitch. "Tickles." "Sorry." You feel yourself drift, skirting the edge of sleep. He is warm and solid and you let yourself relax against him. “This feels...safe..." you say, so close to sleep that you're not sure if you've said it aloud or if you've just thought it. And you're not sure if you hear his response or dream it, one word. Always.

"She's late," says Ezra. "We still got a sixteenth to button up and board," "Still," says Ezra, "Yon freighter will leave with our pod wether we're strapped in it or not." You see Cee and Kit, trailed by Kit's parents, weaving through the crowd. Cee is beaming, her blonde hair has a brilliant streak of blue, and Kit has a matching streak in their hair. "Hey guys!" Cee hugs Ezra and then hugs you. "How was your shore leave, Little Bird? I like the fancy hair." "Isn't that cool? We've got matching streaks," says Cee. "It's semi-permanent," says Kit, "We'll pick a different color next time!" You have to smile. Cee looks revitalized. Three cycles spent with her friend, just doing normal kid things has been good for her. "Check this out!" says Cee and pushes a laminated drawing towards the two of you. Ezra makes a show of looking carefully. "I recognize you and Kit," he says, "I am not familiar with these other people, though." "They're from The Streamer Girl, dumbass," says Cee, "Here's Clo and Reive and Lily and Auri. See? Kit put us right in the story." Ezra gives Kit his best smile. “You drew this? You are very talented." Kit smiles big. "Thanks!" says Kit, "I'll put you guys in the next one! Maybe you could be professors at Bowsun Academy or something." "I look forward to it," says Ezra. "Time to go, Cee," you say and Cee and Kit exchange one more enthusiastic hug. "Later fringeling!" Calls Kit. "Piss off, stationer!" Cee calls back. Ezra curls his fingers around yours and squeezes. Cee tells you all about her three cycles with Kit, the movies they watched, the Real Food they ate. How Kit's little brother wanted a blue streak in his hair too and Kit's parents said no and how mad he got. I wanna be cool like Kit and Cee. "I told him he's got plenty of time to be cool," says Cee, "And he told me that I don't understand how the world works. He's like, four." Ezra laughs. "Wise for his years." Says Ezra. And the three of you fall quiet. You find the pod much as you left it, towed to the Polly Jean and clipped in, transferred by the station's tugs. You settle in and do a full systems check. Calling out the checklists and making sure everything is good for transit. "What are you guys so happy about?" asks Cee. "Whatever do you mean?" asks Ezra. "You been all smiles since I hit the dock," says Cee, "Both of you. Did we score a really good job? Did we win the Puggart Bench lottery or something? What aren't you telling me?" "That," says Ezra, "Is for us to know and you to endlessly speculate about." "Hmph," says Cee.

Tagging: @oonajaeadira, @grogusmum , @honestly-shite, @writeforfandoms, @ladyvengeancesposts, @the-blind-assassin-12

#ezra x f!reader w/cee #ezra prospect x f!reader w/cee #ezra and cee #soft!ezra needs his own warning #don't look at me #this is so soft

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beewritings · 3 years

Text

our final night alive

Eren Jaeger x Reader one shot.

Afab reader, gender neutral pronouns used!

Content Warning: angst & nsfw. Slight violence, first time blowjobs, first time vaginal sex. Not spoiler free, manga is preferred to have been read.

Posted on my ao3.

Summary: You and Eren become lovers, but he disappears years later and it causes conflict on your relationship. I’m bad at summaries I’m so sorry

5.9k words. This is posted on my phone I’m so sorry if the layout is ugly lol. First story posted on here!! :) Feedback is welcomed!

you and eren got together not long after annie was caught being the female titan. you, eren, armin and mikasa became close friends during your cadet days.

you shared a bunk with mikasa, and seeing as she was always focused on eren and armin, you were scared to become her friend because you were unsure if she even wanted friends. you and her became sparring partners during training one day and she, obviously, kept beating you. at some point, eren walks over and tells her to give you a break and so she apologizes to you. from that point on, you always saw eren as a life saver. yes, she kept dropping you to the ground so much to the point where you were in pain so eren saved you. you accepted her apology, of course, and you even got to ask her if you could be friends. mikasa shrugged, but eren answered for her: he said he’d like that. he introduced himself and he called for armin and you introduced yourselves. the four of you never thought you’d actually join their friend group. these were the first friends you made and you never felt happier in your life.

“y/n, what made you want to join the cadet corps? you never told us,” you remember armin asking you one day.

“oh… um… it’s a stupid reason. it’s not worth mentioning… it’ll make it seem like i’m a joke..”

“no reason is stupid. except for that horse face’s reason, that bastard is a coward!” eren said, screeching.

“um.. well as a kid, i was neglected by both my parents. they were so focused on my older brother joining the military police and so happy for him that they basically forgot about me a lot. they always called me a disappointment and such and it always made me feel like shit..”

“so you joined to prove to them you’re worthy?”

“what? hell no, i joined so i could get away from them. i was tired of being treated like i was a mistake child so my choices were either join the military to slowly kill myself or join the military to get away from my terrible parents. i honestly haven’t felt happy probably my whole life. but then i met you guys and now i feel like i have a purpose to be here? i want to protect you guys. all three of you…”

eren gives a slight smile and then it turns into a bright one. he leans to his left and wraps an arm around your shoulder and his other arm around armin and pulls them in. you and armin wrap one arm around mikasa and you all hug each other. you knew you were there to protect them all. even though mikasa is always there to try and protect eren, you know she needed someone to protect her, and you know for a fact someone had to be there for armin.

when discussing what branch of the military you guys were going to join, you four chose to join the scout regiment. then so much happened between when you talked about what you were going to join and graduating as cadets. there were days where you and eren would work together practicing and even though you were her friend, mikasa would keep watching you to make sure you wouldn’t get too close to him. she never told you that she would watch, but she was. when you and eren would spar, there’d be times where he’d pin you on the ground and straddle you with the wooden knife pointing to your neck. you started gaining a crush on eren, not knowing he was too, and you’d blush instead of defending yourself. at some point, you did push him right off of you and pin him instead, which resulted in him with a red face instead.

when switching partners, you sparred with armin next while eren went to reiner. instead of sparring armin, you tried teaching him moves since you knew he was fragile and it wouldn’t have been a fair fight. armin brought up the topic of you and eren.

“so, you and eren? i saw you guys being flustered while sparring.”

“w-w-what??? nooooo, i wasn't flustered???? no one was flustered, armin. haha..” way to be obvious, y/n.

armin giggles and immediately drops the conversation.

eventually, time passes and the colossal titan decides to return, bringing titans with it. cadets are to help kill titans. you ended up on another squad, but you remind yourself to keep in contact with eren and armin. you couldn't keep sight of mikasa being she was with the higher ups, but you tried. you remember crashing into armin with ymir and connie. that's when you find out that… eren got eaten by a titan. it broke your heart, you felt the pieces inside of you tearing apart. you tried being strong but.. tears started to fall. mikasa made her way and she found out too, armin screaming in tears of all the members in his squad who'd died. mikasa was silently angry, calling everyone cowards. she soars off with little gas, and you immediately chase after her. she flew away so quickly, you couldn’t catch up with her. you had to protect her, you promised to protect your friends. one is already gone, you couldn’t have another one disappear. if she disappears, how can you trust yourself to protect armin? after you all made it to the building, killed the titans inside and got to refilling your gases, you find out that the titan who was killing other titans was none other than eren, the kid you started to gain feelings for.

time skip to capturing annie, the female titan, you and eren had finally gotten alone time. a time to talk your feelings out as eren heals from his fight with her. you went to visit him when you know everyone already has, but when you know he was still awake. it’s been a few years since you’ve met and started gaining feelings, being as you met when you were 12 and are now 15.

“hey, eren. how’re you feelin’, titan boy?”

“ugh, don’t call me that, y/n. that’s the least thing i wanna hear from you.”

“sorry…”

“.... y/n?”

“eren?” you both say at the same time.

“oh, you can-”

“no no, you go.”

you both give off small laughs.

“you go first, y/n.”

“um. well, i’m pretty sure this is the wrong time to bring this up considering you’re tired from fighting that female titan. plus this war isn’t near over and i shouldn’t be focused on feelings because we are soldiers but, uh. i have-”

“me too,” eren cuts in.

“feelings, i- what? i didn’t even finish-”

“it’s been obvious. well, not really. i didn’t think it was obvious, but i figured by the way we’ve been acting towards each other. we always get flustered when we’re close to each other. y/n, did you even realize that you’re holding my hand?”

you both look down and see that you’re holding his hand. you snatch it back with a flushed face and start stuttering.

“i-i-i always h-hold my friends' hands!!! i k-know you’ve seen me hold armin’s!! please, y-you’re not special, eren jaeger!”

eren giggles and blushes as well, leaning to grab your hand once more, this time interlocking the fingers.

“i agree. this isn’t the time for romance considering we are soldiers in the middle of a battle. but that doesn’t make me not want to further this relationship between us.. i-if you want that, that is…”

you bite your lip, looking away from him. you squeeze his hand and he caresses your skin with his thumb. you both kind of just ended the conversation there, but everything was mutual between the two of you. you knew what you wanted. a relationship, but never really having the title due to the war you all were going through. time flies and the battle with reiner and bertholdt to capture eren back from them happens. all you could feel about this battle was anger; you were going to get eren back. and you did. during the time where everyone was healing from it, that’s when you and eren both told both mikasa and armin about the little thing you guys had.

armin was supportive, he was easy. but mikasa took it a little hard, not showing it though. you pulled mikasa away and had a long talk with her about it, tell her you didn’t mean to catch feelings for the man she’d grown to protect with her life, it kind of just happened. but she couldn’t stay upset forever. she wishes for eren to be happy, and as she can see: you made him happy. the happiest he’s been. and she wants you, one of her best friends to be happy too, and clearly it was with eren. since then, you and eren have been open with your relationship. everyone knew, and no one tried to end it. when you guys told the crew, most of them basically said “we figured”. jean actually laughed and didn’t believe it at first, “really? in a relationship with that suicidal blockhead? yeah, alright .” so you did what any couple would do to prove their relationship, you kissed eren in front of them all, in plain sight. that was your first kiss. his, also. jean’s face turned red in embarrassment and he turned away. “alright, whatever. you’re both crazy.”

you miss him.

you miss eren. you all found out about what was truly outside the walls, and you helped eren cope the most. you know he really wanted to kill the enemy, they caused so much pain to his home inside the walls. he wanted revenge. you understood and supported his anger, you were there with him through every moment. his rants, his tears, his fears. you backed him up; you were on his side. so why did he still leave you alone? why did he disappear from you and your friends? why were you all in marley, watching his attack titan destroy it from above? you weren’t completely mad, you all were gonna infiltrate marley eventually, you just did it quicker and earlier than planned. when you saw him with your own eyes, his titan, your heart sunk. he looked so different.. has it really been that long? no way. and… he grew such long hair.. god. it was actually kind of hot, but you were too angry to admit it.

you sigh. you stood in the blimp, you didn’t do any fighting. you explicitly told commander hange and captain levi that when you arrive at marley, you refuse to fight. you were in gear, in case you had to, but you mainly stood in the ship with them. when everyone retreated after mikasa recaptured eren, captain levi kicked him to the wall. mikasa tries to run to them, but armin’ stops her. you were in a distance, out of eren’s eyesight but you could see him. you really hated his damn face right now.

two soldiers with guns run to him, pointing towards him. levi starts to speak to him once more.

“this brings back memories, eren. you have such a kickable face.” that earns a small chuckle from you. “after you’re tied up, let’s have a chat.”

“that’s fine, i explained everything in the letters though. did you not understand it?”

“tch. that face reminds me of the rotten shits who lived underground. never thought i would see it on you. but cheer up, everything happened like you wanted it to, right?”

eren just stares off into space, but then looks levi straight in the eyes and he mumbles out, “... where are they?”

“who?”

“you know who… where is y/n.”

“tch. oi, l/n. talk to your shithead boyfriend before anything else happens. i’m tired of looking at his disgusting face.”

levi walks away, tells the soldiers to chain him up and they walk away, leaving you finally in his eyesight. internally, his heart sinks. the look on your face was pure disgust, and anger. you walk towards him, and he looks up at you with his dead souled eyes. you clench your fists.

“y/n…”

you let out a huge breath. “eren.”

“... y/n, i’ve mis-”

you already know what he was going to say, and it just pisses you off. you growl and punch the wall behind his head. you lean your leg back and kick it right into his stomach. you grab a fistful of his hair, gripping it and bringing his face to yours. mikasa tries to push through armin, but armin manages to hold her back still.

“y/n, stop !” mikasa screams.

“do you have any FUCKING clue how worried i’ve been, eren?! HUH?! DO YOU??” you ignore mikasa, “besides mikasa, i probably was even more worried than her! YOU LEFT ME, EREN. are you stupid, eh? HUH? are you fucking stupid? you like knowing your partner is just worried sick about you? fuck the plan, if i wanted to i would throw you off this air ship myself. i don’t even like looking at how disgusting you look, you’re hideous. that dead look in your eyes. you’re not even eren! you’re some man who’s a fucking joke, you don’t care about us do you?! that time on the train? when you said we were all important to you? was that a lie? do you even think we are?” you bang his head into the wall and knee him in the face, bruising his nose and bleeding from it. tears start to well up in your eyes, “i missed you, eren… why’d you just leave us like that? i’m your partner… whatever, you’re not worth my time right now. i’m going to check on the others.”

you let go of eren’s hair, look at him a second more and make a disgusted face once more. “you’re not worth my tears.” you start to walk towards the back of the airship.

“you never left my mind the whole time i was there, y/n. i promise you. ”

you clench your fists and ignore him, continuing to walk to the others to see who made it on the airship.

“eren.”

“... y/n?”

you went to visit the prison before commander hange did. you needed to talk to him.

“we need to talk.”

“i’m all ears, my love.”

you hate that he’s seriously using pet names on you right now. it’s always been a weakness. my love, baby, lovebird. you loved them all.

“cute, we using pet names after i beat this shit out of you? okay, sweetie. i’ll call you titan man, yeah?”

“come on, don’t start that again. what are you here for, hm?”

“to talk.”

“okay.. so talk. come on, you know you want to start with how i look.”

“how you look? haha, okay. you want me to say that you look hot? that i want you to ravage me? bend me over and do nasty things to me?”

eren smirks, “actually, yeah. if that’s how you feel, i’d love to hear you say that.”

you chuckle, hating that he isn’t wrong. you do feel that way about him right now. him being really attractive right now, a man bun AND he’s shirtless? this is so unfair.

“well, too bad then. you won’t hear me say those words with confidence. but it would be nice…” you grin and lick your lips.

“oh? unlock these prison bars, and i’ll show you a good time then, baby.”

“no. let’s be serious now-”

“i am serious.”

“no, eren. we need to seriously have a talk,” you give out an exhale, “why’d you do it? do you have a plan in mind?” eren sighs, about to cut you off but you continue, “i’m being serious, eren. i’m not planning on telling the others. this is between us… why’d you leave me?” you start to tear up, “why, eren… you have a good reason for this, right?”

eren looks away from you, not wanting to make eye contact. “i have a plan, y/n. it’s going to work, i know it is.”

“what is it, baby? please, just between us two… i need to know why you left me for so long. i’ve been hurting so much. i love you eren, so fucking much. i literally can’t see myself without you, i see a future with you. please, eren. i want to be with you through it all, thick and thin. we are going to defeat marley together, right?”

“y/n. you are the light in my life, the reason i’m doing everything i am. i want you to live such a perfect life, whether it’s with me or not. i know what i’m doing. i’m doing it for you.”

“no.. no no no! you’re supposed to be doing it WITH me, not FOR me! we’re a pair, we do it together!” you bang on the prison bars, “please eren… i can help you.. yes, i’m upset with you, and i love armin and mikasa, even jean and connie! hell, i love sasha too, god rest her soul. i’m here to protect them all, just as i was in the cadets to protect you, armin and mika. but i love you the most, and if i had to choose… it’s always going to be you. i’d betray my comrades for you, eren-”

“no. no you wouldn’t. I wouldn’t let you. i love you, y/n. with my life, my heart, my soul. i’m willing to die for you if i could, but i will not let you betray the others. they need you more than you need me.”

“eren…” you’re full blown crying now, tears running down your face and overall a crying mess. you reach your hands between the bars holding his face in them and he places his arms through the bars to your waist, “please, eren. let me be by your side. i know floch released information about you, us imprisoning you. it was a tough decision, but someone leaked information to me about how you’re going to escape and meet some of your, uh, followers? they didn’t know if they were supposed to tell me considering the fact i was so angry with you on the airship, but someone slipped up. i know that’s not your real plan, you have something else planned for this… there’s no way you want to be on zeke’s side.. right?”

eren laughs, “hell no. i fucking hate that guy.”

“then what are your true intentions, eren…” you run your thumb across his lips, glancing back and forth between his eyes and lips.

“... i can’t tell you. to protect you, armin, mikasa… the others. i can’t tell you. you’re not joining floch and my followers. you’re staying with the scouts.”

“eren, i’m not-”

“l/n? are you down there?”

you and eren pull away from your intimate hold, and put some distance between yourselves. you cough.

“yes, captain. sorry. i had to give eren another beating and more yelling.”

“well, get out. you’re not allowed to be alone with eren.”

“yessir!”

eren looks at you and looks away. you lean back in the prison bars, grab his shoulders and bring it between the bars. you give him a kiss, a light yet deep kiss. one that just screams, please eren. he kisses you back, putting one hand on your waist. you pull away from his lips.

“.... i love you, eren. please, reconsider,” you whisper.

“i love you, y/n. more than you ever will know, i promise to spend my last 4 years with you,” his words make you tilt your head in confusion, “you’ll understand later. i promise you .”

you start to walk back, but then you hear eren’s last words to you, “you gonna let me ravage you soon, right? don’t act like i know you don’t think i’m so hot now.”

you giggle and walk backwards to look back at him, “i’ll think about. maybe if you’re a good boy, you can bend me over and do nasty things to me. maybe more, yeah?”

“oh? is this a promise or are you a tease?’

“take your pick.”

you walk up the stairs, leaving the man of your dreams locked in the prison.

eren escaped the prison. he met with his followers, the jaegerists, just as you had known was going to happen. you and the squad went to a restaurant to talk with niccolo. you didn’t expect what happened to happen. sasha’s family were there to eat, niccolo found out that the girl who killed sasha, gabi, was upon them and he threatened to kill both her and falco, the young eldian boy with her. after a dramatic episode with sasha’s adopted little sister, the little girl she saved from a titan, you, armin and mikasa take gabi to a separate room. you have a small talk, only to see your beloved walk in, with a threat. but to see eren again made your stomach flutter with butterflies. god you can’t get over how hot he looks.

he tells you to leave, he needs to talk to armin and mikasa by themselves. as he sends you out, there's a soldier who leads you into another room. you assume eren told him to lead you into another room. you take off your green military jacket, leaving you in your normal day outfit. after a bit, eren walks in. you blush, because god damn he’s so hot.

“....”

“... why are you so quiet?” eren asks.

“i-i don’t.. i don’t know. everything that’s happening, it’s just. so confusing…”

“thought you wanted me to bend you over? is that not what you said?”

you look up immediately in shock, “eh?”

eren smirks, “ eh? ” he mocks you, “i said, i thought you wanted me to-”

“i heard you the first time.. seriously, eren? right now? i don’t think this is the right time to-”

“baby, i’m joking. well, not really. i kind of was hoping we would do something here, but you obviously don’t and i am not going to force you,” he sighs, “can we just… hold hands and sit in silence? everything is stressing me out and i don’t know what to do with you.”

“what to do with me..?”

“shh, just hold my hands and shut up.”

…

“eren jaeger, i know you did not just tell me to-”

“y/n l/n.”

you immediately shut up, knowing you hate when he uses your first and last name. you look away and he reaches forward and places his hands out in front of him, on the table.

“hands.”

you hold his hands, fingers interlocked, and look into his eyes. those teal eyes… you could stare into them forever. you sit in silence for about five minutes.

“y/n.”

you hum in response.

“do you love me?”

“more than life itself.”

“... okay.”

they sit in silence once again.

“eren…”

“yes, my love?”

“.... can we… um…”

“hm? use your words, baby.”

ugh, you hate it when his pet names make you melt. and the way he uses them? UGH he just makes you want to just sit there and obey him forever if it meant him calling you baby. you started to blush and squirm in the chair. eren smirks and chuckles.

“is something wrong, baby? do you… need some release? you look like a pathetic whore in heat.”

you look at him with widened eyes. you’ve never heard eren speak like this to you before, but you.. kinda like it. like, you and eren haven’t even done sexual things so for you both to say dirty things, let alone imply sexual activities towards each other, was new. and well, it seems like that's going to change. eren leans forward with his body, taking back his hands and putting one on the table and one to grip your chin towards him.

“ are you going to fucking answer me? ”

“i-i.. i, um-”

“god, you can’t even speak. you’re so awestruck by the way i’m treating you? it was bound to happen sometime, all you do is cry about how much you love me. it’s annoying. i’m surprised you aren’t a jaegerist, on your knees kissing my shoes. begging for me to fuck the shit out of you. huh? is that what you want? for me to fuck the shit out of you? HUH? answer me, you fucking whore! ” eren slaps your face with the hand that gripped your chin, and he grips it again. he force opens your mouth and he spits in it, “ swallow it. ”

“y-yes sir,” are the only words that could come out, and it boosted his ego and the tent in his pants you didn’t notice until now started to show more. you swallowed the liquid he spit into your mouth and stared into his beautiful teal eyes. you know this is just foreplay, he’s not genuinely angry with you. because his eyes never changed. this is the love of your life… he wouldn’t hurt you. you know he wouldn’t hurt you. you open your mouth to show him you swallowed it and he chuckles.

“ good. ” he lets go of your jaw and pats your head. he looks you in the eye and smiles. a genuine loving smile. he speaks again, “are you okay with this? with what i'm doing?”

you nod, giving a smile back. “i feel amazing, eren. are we… are we gonna, y’know…”

“hm? what did i say about using your words?”

you groan and look away from his eyes. “are we, no, are you actually going to bend me over and do nasty things to me?”

“do you want me to?”

“…yes.”

eren smirks and chuckles. “your wish will be my command.”

on an instant, eren grabs your arm and yanks you over the table. he walks to where you were just standing, and then he drags you by your hair to get off the table. he forces you on the floor, on your two knees to face towards him and his bulge that was being held in his dark pants, screaming to come out. he leans against the table.

“well? what are you waiting for? i’m not helping you. you’re on your own.”

you roll your eyes and you feel like you just know what you’re supposed to do. your hands make way to his pants, unbuttoning it immediately. you pull his pants down to his ankles, and start to rub his bulge. eren sucks in a breath, leaning his head back. he’s getting impatient, he actually can’t wait. he pulls his underwear down, his girthy member slapping against his stomach. he backs up to sit on a chair and spreads his legs apart for you. you stare at him with a flushed face and widened eyes. because it’s your guy’s first time doing anything like this, he smirks and starts pumping his member. pre-cum leaking out. he bites his lip, tilts his head back and lets out a low moan.

“y/n. start. i’m not doing everything for you from here on. suck it.”

you stare at his member, not in fear because your beloved’s cock is big, but in shock. will i… will i be able to fit this in my mouth? let alone.. inSIDE of me?? you lean forward, trying not to let him wait any longer. you lick a long stripe from his balls to his tip, earning a strangled moan from eren. he doesn’t want to pull your hair yet, so he just keeps caressing his thighs. you lick it some more, and then you finally stick him inside your mouth, and he instantly thrusts into your mouth. you let out a choke and pull off to cough. he opens his eyes and puts his hand on your cheek, stroking it.

“i’m sorry baby, i-it was an instant reaction. i’ll try not to do that until you’re ready. j-just.. keep going…”

you nod your head after coughing, letting your mouth right back onto his cock. you slowly start to bob your head, letting your tongue glide against the veins. trying not to bite, you start to bob your head quicker. you use your hand for whatever you can't reach and you just do this for a few minutes. eren’s legs start to shake. you lick his tip a few times, and eren’s hands go to your hair, pushing your head down a little further. he’s close. you can’t tell, but he knows he is. he thrusts up into your mouth, making you gag but you also moan, because fuck it feels so good. the vibrations from your noises trigger him, and he thrusts up more.

“f-fuck, y/n… i’m… i-i’m coming-!”

he pushes your head down all the way, your nose touching his skin. you’re gagging as thick liquid spurts up into your throat, making you gag just a bit more. your eyes tear up from the pain in your mouth, but your body feels tingly, on the verge of an orgasm. eren pulls out of your mouth while breathing heavy. you pull back with lust-filled eyes and you know you’re dying to have him inside you now. you open your mouth to show him his cum on your tongue, then you swallow that and show him your tongue once more. he blushes and giggles, looking away from your face. if he looks again, he might cum again, he doesn’t want to. not yet.

“e-eren… i need you… please, eren.”

eren looks at you and chuckles, “fuck… get on the table. i can’t hold back any longer.”

eren helps you up and sets you on the table in front of you both. he pulls off every piece of clothing you had on, your shirt your undershirt, your pants and your underwear, all at once. he refuses to wait. he needs to be in you now. he looks at your wet folds, he knows you were on the verge of cumming. he gives one long lick against you, and you bite your lip, twitching your legs and holding in your moans. he gets up and puts both arms on either side of your head. his member sliding against your folds.

“oh no no no, you are not going to hold back. i want everyone to know who is getting fucked and by who. i want everyone to know my partner of four years is a whore, a slut for my dick. that they’d do anything just to have eren jaeger’s cock in their mouth, in their beautiful pussy. yeah? are you my little cockwhore?”

“yes sir! i’m your little cockwhore, your little slut. please ‘ren, i want you.. no, i need you!!”

“god, baby. say it again, one more time baby..”

“EREN.”

“oh my god, babe. JUST DO IT!”

you both giggle as if there aren’t soldiers threatening your friends and comrades outside that door. eren looks at you with a genuine smile, and he mumbles “please, baby.”

“... i’m your little cockwhore, ‘ren. your little slutty cockwhore.”

“yeah? who’s pussy is this? huh? who’s pussy am i about to fuck?”

“... mine?”

eren lifts an arm and smacks your face, gripping your chin tightly. “try again.”

“y-yours…”

“what was that?”

“it’s yours…”

“what’s mine? didn’t your mother teach you how to speak? what. is. mine?” he uses that hand that gripped your chin to slap his cock against your throbbing area, sliding his cock between your folds.

“this pussy is yours, eren! this virgin pussy is all yours, eren, now can you PLEASE - o-oh!”

eren laughs as he just slides his member inside of you, slowly. it’s both of your first times, but it feels like it’s not. your cunt is so tight, but it feels as though it’s been used so many times. he gets in all the way, and you reach over to grip his man bun. you pull it out of its hair tie because you didn’t want to bother working with it later. he stays in, waiting for you to give him the go. you clench yourself around him, and considering the fact you were on the brink of orgasm when you were sucking him off, you actually orgasm right then and there. you clench around him tightly, moaning and gripping his long hair. he puts his hand back down next to your head.

“y-y/n?!”

“eren! o-oh fuck… -i-i’m sorry… i was on t-the brink of coming, i’m sorry-! EREN!”

he starts to thrust in, using your juices as lubricant and he just goes for it. fuck waiting, you already came. and he was going to make sure you get another orgasm. he wants his baby to be spoiled with his cum. he thrusts in and out, seeing his cock become visible and invisible. you moan, scream, every verb in the dictionary. you move your hands from his hair to his back and chest, leaving marks all over. eren grunts, feelings so good from your nails scratching him. oh god, his baby is making him feel so good. and he know he’s making his baby feel so good too, it’s very well shown on your face. he keep thrusting until he hits the spot to make you wild.

“EREN! oh my god, please eren, i’m so close, please please! please treat me like your little whore! you’re hitting the spot i never knew existed, please don’t stop!”

“you want it? you want me to fuck a baby into you? hm? want your sadistic boyfriend to breed you?”

god, you were losing it. eren grabs your body, he keeps his dick inside and he pulls you down to the chair with him. he wants you to ride him. and god, it’s a new sensation. you feel like you’re seeing god when you ride him. you hop on his lap, and he holds on to your waist while fucking up into you. you stare into his beautiful blueish green eyes. you wrap one arm around his neck and the other to his cheek and you kiss him. he, of course, kisses back. he helps you hop on him while holding your waist. everything feels so good.

“eren… i’m close again..” you mumble to the boy.

“i know , baby, i am too. i am too.”

he leaves marks all over your chest, just as you left nail marks on his back. you guys just sit like this, you keep riding him until you both are on the verge of another orgasm. he holds you against him, fucking into you so quick and fast and it just keeps hitting your walls. you’re both about to orgasm.

“eren! i’m gonna come, i-i’m-”

“let it out baby, i wanna hear you. i want everyone to hear you! please baby, i love you!”

“eren! i’m- f-fuck.. i love you, eren!”

after you both orgasm for a second time, you both sit there. enjoying each other's hot air, finishing off the post orgasm and intimate moment together. you both stare into each other's eyes, sharing the bonding moment. you both smile at each other, and you nuzzle into his neck. you love eren, you loved him so much. you can’t picture your future without him. he helps you up and he sets you back on the table. he looks around the entire room searching for wipes or paper towels. fortunately, he finds paper towels and cleans your private areas off. he’s beyond happy to have shared such a moment with you, finally. he gives you a deep kiss. he loves you so much. he would love to picture himself in your future.

but,

he wasn’t in it.

2 years have passed since the rumbling.

you miss him.

you miss eren so much.

228 notes · View notes

smutsonian · 3 years

Note

Hey,since your writing is amazing can I request a fic where Steve thinks u cheated on him (probably with Bucky) and decides to punish u with rough sex and then he finds out he was mistaken and tries to make it up to u but you weren't having it because trust in a relationship is very important.So it kinda becomes smut+angst (The juicer the better) Thank u💞

mutual trust

steve rogers x reader

summary: you tell steve that without trust, your relationship would always have problems

warnings: smut, angst, jealousy, slight crack fic, ahh that’s it? Tell me if i missed something. Not proofread.

word count: 2.2k

a/n: i wrote two fics today how bout that? (I also cried to times so maybe that’s where I got the motivation and inspiration. Dont worry i cried because of a story and a movie) also, thank you nonnie!

masterlist

“You have to tell him!” Steve hears your harsh whisper just behind the door. Who were you talking to? Why were you hiding?

“Why me? He’s your problem!” Steve is surprised to hear his best friend’s voice. He hears Bucky grunt in defeat before a sound made Steve’s heart stop.

“Oh god! That’s so good!” He hears your familiar moans and he wouldn’t believe the voices in his head if it weren’t for Bucky’s words.

“God, doll! I don’t regret this at all!” Bucky lets out a moan as well before grunting in satisfaction.

Steve listens to your harmonized moans before he decided that he has had enough for it.

He’s going to show everyone that you’re his. He’s going to show you and he’s going to show Bucky.

“Oh god, I am so full!” You let out a cry before plopping on your belly on Bucky’s soft bed.

“But I want more!” Bucky whines, licking the already clean spoon.

You scoff at him before letting out a chuckle.

“How’d you think Sam will react after finding out that his tub of oh-so-delicious ice cream is gone?” You turn on your back before leaning on your elbows to look at Bucky.

“He’s probably going to lose it. He’s a very dramatic guy.” Bucky rolls his eyes at the thought before sighing at your next words.

“Well, too bad that you’ll be the one telling him.” You quickly stand, heading towards his door.

“Doll, that’s unfair!” He whines once more.

“Huh? Sorry, can’t hear ya! Gonna go to my lovely boyfriend now. See ya!” You quickly shut his door before prancing towards your shared room with Steve, your lovely boyfriend.

“Hey, Steviee…” You quickly walk towards your boyfriend before wrapping your hand around his neck and standing on your tippy-toes to place on his lips. He would usually return it with a kiss on your nose but what he did surprised you.

His giant hand makes its way towards your neck and the next thing you know, you’re harshly pinned against the wall that Steve’s been staring at for hours.

“S-Stevie?” Steve’s jaw clenches at the way your innocent eyes stared at him. He should’ve known that other men would want a piece of his girl. She’s too enchanting to be ignored.

“You’re mine. You remember that, okay?” Steve asks, voice threatening but his frown softens a little when you nod at him.

“Good girl…” He whispers before slamming his lips on yours, tongue forcing their way into you and lapping at your helpless tongue.

“You belong to me as much as I belong to you, I know you know that…” He grins when you start whimpering against his lips. The hand on your neck tightens slightly while his other hand finds its way up to your skirt and under your soaking panties.

“Ahh… Is this for me?” Steve asks.

“This is for me, right? Not for someone else?” His voice becomes harsher and he forcefully inserts a finger and then another, prying answers from you. He needed you to assure him. He needed to know that you’re wet for him and not his best friend.

“Y-yes, Stevie! Only you!” Your eyes roll at the sensation of Steve’s fingers and before you could even find release, his hand was pulled out of you.

“W-What?” You yelp when you’re harshly turned, your chest pressing against the wall while Steve’s hand is now on the back of your neck while the other is rashly pulling his pants off.

“Want you to feel all of me…” He whispers and before you know it, his cock is piercing through you without end until his full length is inside of you. Your body is trembling but Steve’s body is holding you up against the wall so you wouldn’t fall.

“You feel me, baby? You feel me deep inside you?” His hand snakes toward your stomach, whimpering and moaning when he pushes on it to feel himself against your skin.

“So good for me, baby… So perfect for me…” He whispers beside your ear before placing a kiss on your neck and sucking on it like his life depended on it.

“STEVE!” You scream as he started thrusting into you harshly, making your toes curl in ecstasy.

“Oh my god, YES!” Your body continues to rub the wall as he continues to pistol into you but you didn’t care because right now, Steve is making you feel so good. He’s owning you and you’re liking it. He’s never usually rough but now… Now that you’ve tasted it, you didn’t know if you wanted soft Stevie back.

“You’re going to cum for me?” The hand on the nape of your neck snakes to the front so he was pulling your body against his while his other finds your clit, encouraging you to cum around his cock.

“I can feel your greedy pussy pulsing around my cock, baby. Come on… Cum for me, baby… Milk my fucking cock…” He ruts into you a few more times before you’re crying out loud… and he’s crying out loud… You’re pretty sure that everyone in the compound can hear you but you didn’t care.

You’re too busy feeling Steve’s liquid filling your stomach.

“You’re mine, baby… He’ll see. Everyone will see…” He presses a kiss on your forehead as your hooded and tired eyes fluttered shut. He catches you when you pass out, your body limp in his arms as he carried you to bed. Washing you with care as if you’re the most important thing in the world.

You wake up feeling sore down there and on your neck but the memories of last night made you smile. Steve really just did that.

But then you remember Sam’s ice cream and suddenly the smile left your face but a devious one replaces it. What drama will Sam put on now?

Feeling a little bad for letting Bucky tell Sam alone, you quickly cleaned yourself up before power walking towards the kitchen where they would probably eating breakfast.

Your heart started thudding louder at the grunts and the sound of punches being thrown. Sam must’ve been really wanting to eat that ice cream for him to attack Bucky…

But when you reached the kitchen, it was a scene that you didn’t expect to see. Sam was holding Steve back from getting another blow onto Bucky’s bloody face.

“S-Stevie?” Your voice makes Steve turn his attention from Bucky to you. His glare turns into a smirk before he shrugs Sam off. He walks towards you before kissing you the same way he did last night. With possession.

“Stevie… What’s wrong?” You whisper after pulling away from him.

He wraps an arm around you before pulling you closer to him. He fixes your hair so the marks he left last night is in full view for anyone, more importantly, for Bucky.

Bucky scoffs before shaking his head at Steve.

“You’ve got it all wrong, punk. You have to start listening before things start to get messy for you. You’re starting something you don’t wanna start--”

“And what is that. Bucky?! You’re the one starting shit here. You’re touching something that’s not yours!”

“For fuck’s sake, Steve! I’m not fucking your girl!” Bucky’s words made the room quiet, only Steve’s heavy breathing could be heard.

“W-what are you talking about? Bucky? Steve?” You look at Bucky and Steve in confusion.

“Steve’s saying that I’m making you cheat on him,” Bucky said with a glare towards his best friend.

“Wh-Why would you think that, Steve?” Steve’s heart skips a beat at the lack of his nickname on your words.

“I heard everything yesterday. Y-You… He was moaning in his room with you...” Steve explained and was answered by Bucky’s unamused laugh.

“Oh, right! We were moaning about how good Sam’s ice cream was. We were deciding who’s going to tell Sam but I guess that’s out of our worries now, ain’t it, doll?” Bucky gives you a faux smile before turning back to a surprised Steve.

“Wait… You ate my…” Sam opened the fridge and it looked like he was about to say something but he shook his head.

“Not the time, Sam… This is not the time…” He tells himself before looking back at the three of you.

“Well, it’s all just a misunderstanding… We can all just forget about it and--” He was cut off by your big movements. You pried Steve’s arm away from you as you stepped back with a look on your face. Whatever it was, Steve didn’t like it.

“Y-you think I’m cheating on you? But you just… Last night…” Your eyes widened in realization and Steve shook his head immediately, knowing what you’re thinking.

“I can’t believe you! W-What were you trying to accomplish, Steve?! You did all that just to prove a point?! And there I thought you were actually doing it for me, you asshole!” You cried before turning towards Bucky.

“I’m sorry for dragging you into this mess. I didn’t know that I wasn’t allowed to enjoy some time with my friends.” You sob before turning towards Sam.

“I’ll replace your ice cream, Sam… I’m sorry as well…” The guys watch as you let out a tired sigh while Steve tried to reach for you.

“Baby… It’s not like that! I-I did it for you! For us!” Steve pulled you into a hug, refusing to let you go. Refusing to let you walk out of his life.

Sam gave Bucky a look and then they walked out of the kitchen, giving you and Steve some privacy.

“You don’t trust me enough that you’d think I’d cheat on you?” Your voice was broken and Steve’s heart couldn’t bear it.

“No! I mean, yes… I trust you, baby! I just don’t trust Bucky with you! I don’t trust anyone with you! People would do anything to take you away from me and, and--”

“And you don’t trust me enough that you think that I’ll let them take me away from you? Do I make you feel like that? Am I doing things that make you think that I’ll do that to you?” You cry as he shakes his head.

“No, baby… It’s just me being… me. I’m being ridiculous, I’m sorry. There’s no excuse for being an asshole. Please, forgive me.”

“You don’t trust me, Steve. There will always be a problem if you don’t trust me, Steve….” Your voice started to become dismissive and it scared Steve endlessly.

“I-I know… I know, baby… I’ll be better. Please. I trust you. I fucking do! I’m just scared, okay? I don’t want anyone taking you away from me. It’s not just Bucky, okay… That was a mistake. I know you two would never do anything like that. There’s just always a threat when I’m around and I don’t trust myself to be able to protect you all the time. I love you too much and I can’t afford to lose you, okay? Baby, I fucking love you too much…” He starts to cry as well, his hold on you becoming tighter and desperate.

“You have to start trusting me, Steve… I know what I’m getting into and I won’t let anything happen to me, to you, or to anyone else here. You have to start trusting me, Stevie. If we want this to work, you’ll have to trust me…”

Steve eagerly nodded, his chin hitting your head slightly, finally glad to hear that nickname again.

“I promise. I fucking promise. I’m sorry for being a fucking asshole. There’s no excuse and I will forever be making up for it.” He pulls away to look at your face, slightly feeling better at the now loving look on your face.

“I’m just hoping that you trust me enough to give me a second chance…” He tilts his head to the side, smiling sadly yet cheekily at you.

“That’s the thing, Stevie…” You sighed exasperatedly as you looked down at the floor.

Steve’s heart shattered at the action. Were you going to deny him? Leave him?

His heart stopped when you turn to look at him with a teasing smile.

“I’ve always trusted you. Until now, I trust you with my life and my heart but please… For the love of Sam’s delicious ice creams…. Would you please just trust me? Trust your friends… Not everyone is out to do you wrong, Stevie…” You smile at him before letting him pull you back in his arms, your arms wrapping around his big frame.

“Thank you. And do trust you, baby. I promise to not be a coward anymore…” He chuckles before kissing the top of your head, whispering endless thanks for taking him back.

“You won’t regret it…” Steve whispered.

“Yeah, but she’ll regret eating my ice cream!” Sam’s voice was heard followed by an ‘ow’ when Bucky slaps his head.

“Glad to have you back, punk.” He grins at Steve as Steve smiles at him apologetically.

“Sorry…” Steve whispers as they too shared a hug.

“Just treat your girl right, punk.” Bucky smiles at Steve then at you.

“I will,” Steve replied assuringly before pulling you closer to him. He’ll do anything and everything for you.

---

taglist

General: @readermia @unlikelygalaxygiver @xoxabs88xox @anncutamarica @chaoticfiretaconerd @i-love-superhero @caffiend-queen @coconutqueen21 @jtargaryen18 @jennmurawski13 @mushyjellybeans @ninjabucky @evnscvll @buckstaybucky @donutloverxo @rebloggingeverything @adriannajackson @la-cey @awaywithtime @gotnofucks @empath-bunny @belovedcherry @littlegasps

Anything Chris: @patzammit @princess-evans-addict @shadowcatsworld @notyourtypicalrose @onetwo3000 @bluemusickid @heyiamthatbitch @inlovewiththefictionalcharacters @slytherinandoutasgard

Chris and seb: @harrysthiccthighss

Marvel: @jemzeraion

#steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #captain america x reader #captain america imagine #steve rogers smut #steve rogers angst #bucky barnes x reader #angst

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occasionaloneshots · 3 years

Text

Flowers and Birds

Losers club x Platonic! Fem. Reader (Mainly Stan based, won’t lie)

Watching her cry was something new to the Losers but they would all be there for her. Based off of my Being the Youngest Loser headcanons (I am adoring of my own headcanons and I’ll probably use them again)

CW: De*th mention/de*th anniversary/birthday of a de*d loved one, pennywise canon mention, Sort of a hurt/comfort maybe you’d call it more mutual comfort?, the word “suffocating”, a (Y/n) who cries early in (I know a lot of people hate that but I’m sensitive and also will cry over “Are you okay”, so sorry)

Word Count: 1.4K

----------

The losers club was a safe place for (Y/n), that was something she quickly learned. And in theory she knew that they would understand her being upset about things. Feelings weren’t a silent topic, she had seen Stan and Eddie cry at least twice in the year she knew them, but she didn’t want to show hers around them. She wasn’t exactly sure why she didn’t want them too see her when she was upset. Maybe it was because she was the only girl in the group or maybe it was because they all called her the baby. But regardless of the reason, the girl was stubborn about it. She could handling being with the guys for a few hours, put on a fake smile for them, then she could go home and sob while ignore her jewelry box like it was the plague. Backing out of plans was never something she did, it would tip off the guys that something was wrong. She shouldn’t be alone all day today anyway, right?

So she put on her best fake smile as she climbed down the clubhouse ladder. The voice of Richie Tozier met her ears as soon as her feet hit the ground. “That’s where that shirt went, thief!” “You gave it to her last time we were at the quarry smart guy,” Eddie’s voice quips back just as fast and on any other day she would laugh about it. “Do you want it back, Rich?” He paused, looking deep in thought, “No, go ahead and keep it. looks better on you anyway. Plus people will think I have a really hot girlfriend.” The wink that followed the words actually earned him a slight smile back. “As if anyone would believe she’s your girlfriend, Richie. People already think she’s kidding when she says that she’s friends with us,” Stan scoffs over at the dark haired boy. He turns back to give her a smile, face falling as he looked at her, “Are you okay, (Y/n)?”

The question seemed to break a dam in her. She knew if anyone asked that she would break down and Stan was on the list of people who could read her like an open book. And suddenly she was tearing up, looking away from him but accidently locking eyes with Bill. “Hey, w-what happened?” The second question had her sobbing, she didn’t fully know what triggered it. Before she knew it she could feel some one on all sides of her. Mike rubbing her back and Richie cupping her cheek, Stan and Bill both holding her arms to keep her steady. Eddie trying to force a tissue into her hand and Ben resting a hand on her shoulder. And she was thankful for the fact that she had friends who were that worried about her, but the six of them adding to the already existing heat of the clubhouse and the heat being created in her face made her feel like she was suffocating. “Can I,” she takes a shaky breath, “Can I get a little space?” The guys nod, backing away, she did however take the tissue Eddie was trying to give her.

“What ha-happened?” “It’s June tenth,” she gave Bill a sad look, being met with a soft look from him. “Oh,” his voice was soft as he reached back out for her and the girl leans into him. Shaking hands finding their way to the back of his shirt, clinging to the fabric. (Y/n)’s face was pressed into his chest, not crying as hard now but still sniffling, a few tears joining them. “What’s June tenth?” Bill looks over to Ben with a soft smile, “It’s her sister’s birthday.” It’s also the day that clown got her, (Y/n) thought, finding her fists tightening more around the fabric of his flannel. “You have a sister? Why haven’t we met her?” Ben’s cheery voice held a hint of confusion. Why would someone cry over a sibling’s birthday? “She disappeared on her birthday two years ago,” (Y/n) took a deep breath, “They found her body near the end of that summer with uh,” her eyes cut up to Bill’s, “The other kids who disappeared that year.” Then came the pity. It was a small town, she assumed the other kids remembered the missing posters but then again there was so many who could blame them.

Bill rubs her back, not wanting to talk about it, she couldn’t see the way the six boys shared a panicked look. “Hey (Y/n), you want to go get some fresh air?” Stan’s voice was shaky, desperate to get out of the new energy that had been introduced in the clubhouse. “Yeah, yeah, please,” she nods, patting Bill’s arm. He presses a soft kiss to the top of her head before softly pushing her over to Stan. The leader falls back into his seat beside Mike from before, watching the two leave. (Y/n) swears that she hears a soft “do you think she knows about it” from what she thinks is Eddie’s voice but then again maybe she was imagining it, projecting. Stan lead her towards the park, neither trying to make small talk. And when they got there, he just fell to the ground, legs crossing as he did, almost as if it was habit. The girl followed his actions before pausing, “Would it make you uncomfortable if I laid on you?” Stan shook his head, honestly desperate for some sort of comforting touch. So she laid with her head on his crossed legs, looking up at his face as she pulled her legs up towards her.

“Do you want to talk about her?” The boy was obviously on edge and it bothered her. Did she cause that? “Not really no, the wound’s still kinda open, you know?” He reaches up to touch the scars that line the sides of his face, “Yeah, I get that.” She watches the motion in confusion, “How did you get those?” His shoulders stiffen, “Oh uh, dog attack when I was a baby, I’m still kind of freaked out by them.” She nods, reaching over to grab his bird book off the grass beside them. Stan watches as the girl opens it, laying the bird book on her own chest, “What type do you normally see out here?” He lets out a soft laugh, “Good job changing the subject.” The girl pouts, “No I’m serious, I wanna hear about them, we never hang out alone.” The boy’s dark eyes sparkle a little, the stressed energy seeming to relax off of him in a way that made a small smile rise to her lips.

The duo wasn’t sure how long they were there before their friends showed up if they’re honest. Both sort of lost in their own activity. Stan was trying to explain to her what birds were native to their part of Maine but the girl in his lap was honestly lost on the difference between them. Most of them looked like little brown birds to her but she was trying at some point. Now however she was plucking the little flowers (weeds if she was being honest) out of the grass around them, trying to balance them in his curls. Stan trying not to laugh at her actions. “Good to see you two calmed down,” Mike’s voice made them both look up at him. “He’s very comforting,” She nods, “What are you two doing here?” “You two have been gone for two hours. We came to make sure you were okay,” Ben rubs his arm as he speaks, careful of how he choses his words.

“We were ga-going back to my how-house to watch a movie, do you ta-two want to join us?” “What movie?” The girl sits up as Stan moves his book from it’s resting place on her. “D-Do you want to choose?” She smiles at him, “You have the Little Mermaid?” “A Disney movie? You really are the baby,” Eddie shakes his head. The girl scoff as she stands up, reaching out to help Stan up, “That’s tough talk for a guy who cried while we watched Dumbo last week, Eddie.” He sputters about to respond before Richie cuts in, “That’s so sweet, our little ones watch Disney movies together Mike, we truly are dads now.” The other boy rolls his eyes, “Sure, you guys ready to go watch a movie now?” (Y/n) and Stan didn’t realize it then, but flowers and birds would soon become their escapes for when they were stressed, and it lead to a closeness that made her feel safe to cry around the boys, her boys.

#it #IT movie #it 2017 #it 1990 #stanley uris #stan uris x reader #the losers club x reader #bill denbrough #ben hanscom #richie tozier #eddie kaspbrak #mike hanlon

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imagines-r-s · 3 years

Text

silver - n. patrick

ok, so this is my first time writing anything to do with the NHL, so feedback is greatly appreciated

Nolan Patrick x reader

summary: the one where everyone around you is annoyed of how oblivious the two of you are

my requests are open-- taglist: @sortagaysortahigh

wc: 7.9k

a/n: this is one of my favorite things i’ve ever written omg. also huge shoutout to @barbienoturbby and @sunsetholland for reading this and for validation

warnings: angst, mutual pining, a few swear words, you and nol being oblivious, fighting, brief mention of injury

(gif not mine)

When you got the ‘SOS’ text from Nolan, you quickly assumed the worst. Knowing that he had just gotten out of practice you assumed he had gotten hurt during practice or he was dealing with another migraine and since it was your day off from your job as the Flyers trainer, you assumed the worst - one of your coworkers was there, but that didn’t mean that Nolan would go to them. You were caught even more off guard when he sent a second text a few minutes later, ‘i’m picking you up in 15. be ready’

The cryptic messages from your best friend weren’t helping your confusion, so you decided the best option was to call him. He picked up shortly after the second ring, “Hey y/n/n, what’s up?”

“What’s up? That’s all you have to say after those wack text messages?”

“Um, when you put it like that? Then yes,” you didn’t have to see his face to know that he was smirking, “anyways, I just parked, so I’ll be up to your apartment soon, bye.”

With that, he ended the call, once again adding to your confusion. Deciding the only thing you could honestly do, you got up from your couch and got dressed. You were halfway through getting your hair done when you heard the door to your apartment unlock.

Walking towards the door you saw Nolan, his hair still somewhat wet since he rushed here after practice. “Okay, do I get some form of explanation, or are you just going to stand there?”

“Look, I kinda fucked up. But just hear me out, okay?” he rushed out as he paced your living room.

“What do you mean you kinda fucked up?”

“Okay, so... at practice, me and the boys were talking about the charity gala that’s this Friday and a few comments might have been made about how I don’t have a date.”

“Let me guess. And your dumbass went, ‘I have a date, blah, blah, blah, who just happens to work for our team and you all know her’ and I got roped into the equation?” you said, jokingly.

“Wait, how’d you know?” he said with no hint of humor in his voice.

“Wait, you’re serious? I just assumed you needed me to find you a date? But you said I was your date?” heat rushed to your face at the thought of being Nolan’s fake date to the gala. You don’t know how you’re supposed to make it a whole night while having to pretend to be his.

He simply nodded in response, “Please, y/n/n. It would mean so much. You obviously don’t have to and I can just say you can’t make it or whatever, but-”

“Nol, it’s fine,” you said, cutting off his rambling, “I’m pretty sure I need a dress though.”

Nolan’s smile grew when he heard what you said, “Yeah, that’s why I came here. I kinda figured you’d say yes anyway, so it just kinda worked out.”

“Oh, don’t try to act all cocky on me now, you were just pacing my living room in fear that I would say no.”

“Besides the point. Anyways, let’s go get you that dress,” Nolan said, grabbing your hand and leading you out the apartment. You did your best to ignore the butterflies in your stomach as your hand intertwined with his.

“So, what does your suit look like?” you asked as you glanced around the store for a dress. “Oh, I was just thinking simple black, but I’ll match the tie with whatever color your dress or shoes are. We have to make sure they think we’re actually together.”

“Y-yeah. You’re right,” his words hurt you a little more than they should have. He was right. This wasn’t real and if you didn’t sell it well enough then Nolan would get the backhand of it. “What if I got that black dress over there?” you pointed to a simple off the shoulder black dress with a slit up to your mid-thigh,” and then get colorful shoes that you can get a tie to match?”

You missed the way Nolan gulped when you were busy looking for your size. He already knew the dress would look amazing on you, so when you found your size he knew he was in for it. “I’m going to go try this on real quick, I’ll be back,” you said before making your way to talk to an associate there.

As soon as you stepped out of the dressing room in the dress, he knew he was screwed. His mind immediately going places that it shouldn’t have.“Nol, what do you think?” you asked, snapping him out of his thoughts. He was thinking a lot more than he should have. “Oh, uh, you look beautiful, y/n,” he forced out.

“I feel like this look would need a statement necklace or something to go with it, to kinda draw it all together, you know,” you said before doing a spin, “I don’t think I’m going to get it though.”

“You’re getting it,” he insisted. He didn’t care about the price, he knew that the dress was meant for you. He didn’t care that he might only see it once, but he could tell you loved the dress. He also loved you in the dress.

Whenever you got home that night, you were met with your roommate in the kitchen. “So, you going to tell me where you and Nolan were all day? And don’t try to deny it, I heard your conversation this morning about the gala,” Mae teased.

Mae had known you long enough to know how you felt about Nolan, she also knew Nolan well enough to know how he felt about you. Being the photographer for the Flyers, gave her an insight into the many interactions that you and Nolan had - both of you always looking for the other when there’s practice or a game, stolen glances when he’s on the bench, and him going out of his way to see you in your office (even when he isn’t hurt). She knew that if the two of you just said how you felt, that the two you would be happy with each other.

“If you heard our conversation, I don’t know why you’re asking what we did. We went shopping, that’s all.”

“Have y’all confessed your love for each other yet? Or is it still ‘unknown’ information?”

“It’s all very one-sided and you know that.”

“Not according to Kevin,” you scoffed.

“Okay, so one person says otherwise.”

“Or TK, or Hartsy, or-”

“Okay, okay. I get it.”

“Pretty much anyone on the Flyers roster would agree with me,” Mae said, making sure her point was clear. Even with everything she said, you still didn’t believe her. “You should honestly just talk to him. And maybe actually be honest about how you feel for once.”

“Anyways, I have to go shower now. I still have to get some stuff ready for the gala tomorrow,” you left before she could say anything more.

…..

Nolan had decided to take it upon himself to make sure you had the best possible day that you could. Since he didn’t have practice, he decided to go to your favorite bakery and get you breakfast and your favorite coffee. Knowing that you most likely wouldn’t be up for a while, he swung by a jewelry shop to get you a necklace to go with your dress to ‘bring the look together’.

“Hello sir, how can I help you today?” the salesperson said when Nolan walked in.

“Oh, so I was wondering if you had any type of hockey charms? Or initial charms?”

“Yes, we do actually. Silver or gold?”

“Definitely silver,” he said, thinking back to your shoes and his tie.

“Alright, if you’ll follow me,” the man led Nolan over to a glass display, directing him to the sports charms that they had. When Nolan saw the hockey charms, he smiled at the thought of you wearing it. “And what initial did you want, sir?”

“An ‘N’ “

After he paid for the necklace he made his way towards your apartment. Using the spare key you had given him when you took into account how many times he came over, he opened your front door.

“I still forget the fact that you have a key,” Mae said looking up from the couch, “Is that what I think it is?”

“Which thing?” Nolan said, setting his keys down on the counter. He noticed that you weren’t in the living room and assumed you were still asleep.

“I was just talking about the coffee and bag from the cafe, but is there something else?”

Nolan simply nodded, “yeah, I just want y/n to have a good day since she’s going with me to the gala.”

Mae eyed him suspiciously, “What else did you get her?”

“Huh?”

“You said ‘which thing’, which hints that there’s more than just coffee.”

“Oh, I got her a necklace for tonight.”

“Did you give her a key to your apartment and an engagement ring, too? Or is that next week?”

Nolan simply rolled his eyes at her statement, “It’s not like that.”

“It’s only that way because both of you are stubborn and oblivious. Did you get me a bagel or just her?” Mae said, glancing at the bag. Nolan nodded before getting everything out of the bag, “thanks, Nolan.”

He made his way towards your room, quietly opening the door to make sure not to wake you. Stopping for a moment at your door when he saw your sleeping form, before making his way to your bed. “y/n/n, I got you your favorite,” he said gently.

“Too early,” you groaned into your pillow, causing Nolan to laugh. “Babe, it’s 1 pm and Mae said you even went to bed early,” Nolan didn’t realize what he had said, but after hearing him say that nickname you were wide awake.

“It’s still too early,” you said, finally sitting up, “but what did you get me?”

“Your usual,” he handed you the bad when he noticed you had gotten settled against your headboard.

“Thanks, Nol. You know you don’t have to do-,” you paused as you noticed the jewelry box that he was still holding, “what’s in the box?”

“Oh, I-uh, I got you something for tonight. Obviously, you don’t have to wear it if you don’t want to, I just thought it would look nice with the dress,” he wasn’t even sure what prompted him to get it.

“Show me,” you said, taking a drink of your coffee.

“What?”

“Nol, show me what you got me,” you chuckled at his obvious nervousness. He ignored the fear that you would hate it as he struggled to open the box. When he finally got the box open, he immediately passed the box over to you. The anxious feeling in his chest only grew when there was no immediate response from you.

“I, uh, wow. Nolan, you shouldn’t have. You didn’t have to do this, you know.”

“Y-yeah, I know. But you said you needed a necklace to go with it and you honestly deserve so much for agreeing to go with me,” he said, finally meeting your eyes. “You deserve the world, y/n/n,” he whispered, averting his gaze down to your lips. You weren’t sure if you imagined it or not, but when you looked back up at him, he had gotten closer than he was before.

“Nol,” you whispered, as you noticed that he was getting closer, his lips eventually ghosting over yours.

“Hey, Nol, these bagels are great are you sure that you got them from the usual cafe,” Mae yelled as she barged into your room, causing the two of you to practically jump away from each other.

“Um, yeah,” he stated, his voice laced with annoyance,” the same one that’s a block away. Just like the bag says.”

He immediately shot a glare your way at the sound of both you and Mae laughing, “god, someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed. Don’t you agree, y/n?”

“Oh, yeah. For sure,” Nolan’s face softening at the sound of you laughing.

…..

Mae stayed in your room while you got ready for the gala - helping you out anytime you needed with either your hair or makeup. As she listened to you ramble about Nolan and the day you had yesterday, she knew she had to interfere. Quickly pulling out her phone, she pulled up the contact of the one person she knew who would help her out, who just happened to be Nolan’s best friend.

heyyy teeks, i need your help

tk: i feel like you only text me when you need something. but what’s up

y/n and nolan.

tk : oh ok, yeah. he said she was his date for tonight though? i just assumed they finally talked it out?

well, they’re going as the others ‘fake date’. i’m very impatient and they are very dumb, so i need you to think of something

tk : why can’t you think of something?

i won’t be at the gala + i’m out of ideas

After the exchange of many text messages, Mae and Travis finally had a plan to help their two dumbass friends finally talk about how they felt.

“Who are you texting?” you asked when you saw Mae furiously typing away.

“Oh, just asking Teeks about the practice schedule?” she said, quickly coming up with an excuse.

“You know we work at the same time? Right? Like our schedules are the exact same?”

“Oh, yeah. I just wanted to see when would be a good time to get some statements for the team’s Instagram stories.”

You nodded hesitantly,” for some odd reason, I don’t believe you. But I also don’t know if I really want to know.”

“Anyways, what time is Nol picking you up?”

“He should be here-,” stopping when you heard the front door unlock, “now.”

Before you were even able to stand up from your vanity, Mae was already at the door. “Woah, Nolan, who knew you could clean up well.”

“Wow, Mae. You’re always so nice to me,” Nolan grumbled in response, “where’s y/n/n?”

“She should be out soon. She looks hot as hell, by the way. I know you’ll see her, but I just thought I’d let you know beforehand.”

“Well, it is her. She always looks beautiful,” he said without a second thought.

“Ooooh, Nol. You getting soft on us? Over a girl? Gasp. Never saw that one coming.”

“Mae, shut the literal fuck up. I swear if you make one more joke about me and y/n, I’ll-” before he was able to finish his sentence, you had emerged from the hallway wearing the dress. The dress. The same dress that nearly made him pass out in the store. Except now, you also had on the necklace with his initial and the shoes that matched what he was wearing. “Wow.”

You giggled at his reaction, trying to ignore the heat that rushed to your face, “wow to you, too.”

“Was that you were saying, Nolan? I make one more joke about you and-” Mae interrupted, snapping both you and Nolan out of whatever trance you were in. Nolan saw the look of confusion cross your face, “I won’t get you any bagels next time I go out.”

“Oh, you wouldn’t!”

“I would, actually.”

“Okay, did I miss something?” you said, looking between your two best friends.

“No,” the both of them said simultaneously.

….. As the two of you entered the ballroom that the gala was taking place, you took note of the amount of orange, black, and white decorations filling the room. All the players were scattered throughout the ballroom with their dates, some dancing, some near the bar, others talking.

Nolan kept his arm wrapped around your waist as he led you near Travis and Joel, who were standing near the bar. He let his arm fall when you mentioned you needed to go talk to Ryanne and made his way over to the boys.

“Dude, I thought you were joking when you said you were bringing y/n as your date,” Joel said when he knew you were far enough away.

“She looks hot as hell, I say that respectfully. If Mae found out I said that - in any context - she would murder me,” Travis knew that what he was saying would have an effect on his friend, that’s exactly why he said it. This was the plan that he and Mae had agreed to, the plan they hoped would work.

Nolan clenched his jaw, his body becoming tense from the words that he had heard from his friends. “Ok, Travis,” he simply nodded, in hopes that the conversation would end there.

“I mean is she still single?” Joel added.

“Well, I mean, yes, but-”

“I might ask her out soon. I mean you said she was single, right?”

“Yeah, but-”

“Ooh, Farabee’s getting bold,” Travis added.

Before Nolan could get another word out, you had made your back to the boys. “Hey, Nols. Did you want to go dance with me?” you asked, using all the courage you had in you.

“No,” he inwardly grimaced at how sharp his answer came out, but he was upset. He knew you deserve someone better than him. All his insecurities were reaching the surface over a simple statement his friend had made.

“No?”

“Yeah, why don’t you ask Farabee,” your brows furrowed as you saw him get up and walk away, joining Carter and Hayes at a table.

“Um, what’s up with him?”

“Farabee made a joke about his hair,” Travis made up on the spot.

“Oh, his hair?” to which both boys nodded, “um, alright.”

Your thoughts were racing. You knew it was something other than a joke about his hair, he would have chirped back if it was something like that. You hesitantly agreed to dance with Joel, knowing that after you danced you need to talk to Nolan. You and Joel made small talk, but your mind was a thousand miles away. “I can tell your mind is on something else, what’s up?” Joel interrupted your thoughts.

“I know you didn’t say anything about his hair,” you shot him a pointed look.

Joel only chuckled in response, “oh yeah, me and Teeks were trying to get him to admit something about how he felt about you, but instead he got all snarky. It definitely defeated the purpose of the joke, but we didn’t expect him to not say anything. If you go to him and talk to him, I’m sure it’ll all be okay.”

Once the song that was playing ended, that’s exactly what you did.

Or at least that was what you planned on doing.

You knew that finally telling Nolan how you felt would be risky. That’s what had stopped you so many times. But right now, the stars seemed to have aligned. Every one of your friends was telling you that things were mutual and that nothing would go wrong if you were just honest. Everything was leaning in the right direction.

Until you hit a stop sign.

That stop sign being Nolan being nowhere in sight. And once you saw him, you wished you hadn’t. You watched from a distance as the person you were about to confess your feelings to had another girl in his arms. An ex-fling of his that he said he was over. Her making advances, him not necessarily ignoring them.

Quickly turning on your heel, you grabbed your phone out of your clutch and called Mae. “Hey babes. Are you calling to say you won’t be home and that you and Nol- are you crying?”

“Can you just come and get me? If you can’t I can get a ride home, but-” you sniffled.

“Yeah, yeah, of course. I’m on my way.”

Your feet led you towards the front lounge area near the entrance where you waited on Mae. You didn’t want to talk about anything, so you texted TK asking him to come to the front entrance.

“Love, what happened?”

“Nolan was- he was, uh. Fuck. tried to-to go talk to him and he was with his ex, but yeah. He was already avoiding me before and I was just wanting to tell him,” by the time you had finished explaining, Travis had already enveloped you in his arms.

“Nolan is an idiot, alright? He’ll realize his mistake, but don’t blame yourself, ok?”

Before you could respond, you got the text from Mae saying she was here. “Mae’s here.”

“Make sure you get some rest and let me know if you need me to beat him up for you,” he said, finally getting you to smile.

When you finally made it to Mae’s car, she passed you a pint of your favorite ice cream and then the two of you made your way home. She didn’t know ho

…..

“Nolan James Patrick, get your ass over here before I drag you off the ice,” Mae yelled throughout the rink. It was only a few people running drills, so she wasn’t interrupting an ‘official’ practice - she wouldn’t care if she had. Mae had to finish editing some new posts for the Flyers’ social media and she also had to kick Nolan Patrick’s ass, so might as well kill two birds with one stone.

“So you won’t answer my calls, but you’ll drag me out of morning skate?” Nolan said, as he skated towards where she was standing.

“Yes, exactly. What the fuck happened? y/n won’t leave her room and she told me she’s debating calling off work tomorrow, which is dumb because she’s the only trainer competent enough for game days.”

“She just assumed the worst, that’s what happened. And if she wants to avoid me that much, so be it,” he stepped off the ice to get closer to Mae.

“You aren’t slick, Pat. Everyone can see how miserable you are without her. And it’s only been like 10 hours.”

He knew Mae was right. He felt awful for what had happened at the gala, spending all the time after you left sulking and he only came to morning skate to get his mind off things, but he could only imagine how you had felt. “Look, Joel said something about asking her out, I was mad, and I also happened to run into an ex. Nothing happened between me and her, but I think y/n/n saw. Is she going to be ok?”

“Well, all things considered, if you clear up the air with her and actually talk to her like a man, instead of acting like a prepubescent boy. I’m sure she’ll be okay, but the two of you actually have to talk.”

Nolan’s head wasn’t in the right space, from morning skate or to regular practice. His mind was anywhere else, but in the game. It was so bad that he was close to being benched for his next game. His teammates were aware of what was going on, knowing they had to do something to at least get his head in the right spot.

You weren’t supposed to come in to work until later tonight to prepare for the game, but Mae had asked for your help with a piece she was working on about the Flyers staff and trainers. So, you quickly packed up your work bag and made your way to the rink. Going to your office first, you expected Mae to be the person in the chair, but you were met with the one person you were trying to avoid. “y/n, hey.”

Your heart skipped a beat after hearing his voice for the first time in a while. “Hey, Nolan. Look about the other night, it wasn’t my place to be upset. I was only there as your fake date, so me getting upset about seeing you with another girl shouldn’t have bothered me as much as it did.”

“No, y/n/n. What happened on my part wasn’t right, you’re not in the wrong for reacting how you did,” he knew you would take the blame, but he also knew he had to make sure that how you felt was reasonable and there was nothing wrong with you reacting.

“Look, me and you are fine, I promise. We’re back to being best friends, I have to go talk to Mae. I’ll see you tomorrow,” you said before turning around and leaving Nolan. You hadn’t said everything that you wanted to, but right now wasn’t the time.

Nolan started following you out of your office, making an attempt to catch up to you. “y/n/n, nothing happened between me and her, I promise.” He could only watch as you kept walking away.

…...

“So, are you and Nol going to do your handshake? Or are you going to let the team lose against the Islanders? Like I know you know some of the guys on the team, but that’s very disloyal of you,” Mae asked as she opened the door to the arena, quickly stepping to the side so that way you could jump and hit the top of the door.

“You do realize that the results of the game don’t depend on if me and Nol do the handshake?”

“Alright, Ms. ‘I have to hit the top of the doorway or else we’ll lose’. You literally left the arena crying one day because you forgot to do it.” Game days were very ritualistic, for both staff and the players. Many players had their own habits and rituals that they knew helped them win a game, some of the staff had their own rituals - you included.

You always made sure to get you and Mae your usual coffee order before the two of you made your way to the rink. Every time you entered the arena or left your office, you would jump up to hit the top of the doorway - which everyone on the team thought was hilarious, even though a lot of them started doing it themselves. Then there was the secret handshake you and Nolan do almost every time he goes on the ice.

“Look, my habits are reasonable, but I don’t know if the handshake will happen today,” you answered honestly.

“Knowing him, he’s not going to let you avoid it. He needs it just as much as you do.”

“What do you mean?”

Mae chuckled in response, “you really are oblivious sometimes. Alright, well anytime you two do the handshake, both of you visibly light up. I’ve seen it enough times to know that I’m not wrong. It’s a part of both of your routines and you’ll freak out if it doesn’t happen, so even though stuff is going on between the two of you, it’s not going to change the fact that you’re both a part of the others routine.” You visibly gaped at your best friend, which only made her laugh harder. “Look, you can act shocked all you want, but the two of you are so used to seeing each other at least once a day, that the two of you not talking consistently is driving both of you crazy.”

“I’m not going to agree, but I’m not going to deny it.”

“You literally can’t deny it because I’m right,” she said in a sing-song voice.

“Anyways, moving on. What posts do you have planned for tonight's game?”

“Well, I’ve kinda been working on a secret project, but I still need a few more shots for it. But other than that, just the usual posts of goals made and action shots.”

“Ooh, secret project? Am I allowed in the secret social media project?”

“No, you’re not at that level of clearance yet, top secret,” she smirked,”also, you know it’s almost time for morning practice and if I remember correctly, you still have to do your job. You still haven’t gotten your bag from your office yet, so you better hurry babes.”

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I’ll meet you down there?” to which she nodded in response. As the two of you made your way down to the ice, you took a detour to get to your office, leaving Mae by herself.

Mae went to the usual spot that the two of you would stand during morning skate, which also happened to be the same spot that you would stand at during the games, right in between the bench and the tunnel. While you were in your office, Mae was able to set up to get a few action shots - even though it was just morning skate she loved getting pictures of the boys when they weren’t necessarily in their competitive mode.

While she was taking a few pictures, she noticed Nolan looking around the rink, his eyes always coming back to where she stood after finishing a drill or lap. When she saw Travis skate near the bench, she quietly called him over, “dude, look at Nolan. He looks like a lost puppy.”

Nolan’s head still wasn’t in the right spot, he was able to get it together enough to be able to play, but his head was everywhere else. When he saw Mae, he immediately started looking for you, which only bummed him out more when he realized you might have actually called in saying you wouldn’t be able to make it.

“Oh, yeah. He’s been like that all day since he hasn’t seen y/n here. Did she actually call in like she said she would?”

“No, she’s just in her office getting her bag. She threatened not to do their handshake, so you know things are serious,” she said, taking a few more pictures.

“Damn, Pat will go insane if she’s actually serious.”

“She’s not serious, she better not be at least.”

“Oh shit, the project. You’re still working on it?” TK asked, to which Mae nodded.

“You mean to tell me Teeks knows about the project and I don’t,” you interjected, causing them both to laugh.

“Dude, Pat thought you actually called in today and he looked like he was going to cry,” Travis added.

“Who told him I was thinking about calling in?” you asked, looking between the duo in front of you.

“I kinda showed up to practice yesterday and threatened him. Nothing serious, just the usual ‘get your shit together or else’,” Mae said, shrugging, “he’s very threatened by those shorter than him.”

At the sound of your laugh, Nolan’s head immediately snapped over to where he knew you usually stood, seeing you around Mae and Teeks. His face and mood immediately lighting up at the sight of you standing there.

Teeks left shortly after, leaving you and Mae alone. “Was Nol that worried I wouldn’t come?”

“Bitch, you can’t be serious right now? Of course he was worried, you’re basically his good luck charm at this point.”

“I’m not-”

“You are. Don’t even try to deny it. You and I both know it. I’ll see you at lunch”

Nolan took notice of how quickly you looked for him whenever Mae left. He wasn’t sure if it was intentional or just routine, but the smile that you sent his way had him forgetting any worries he had. Just as he was about to come over to you, Coach ushered him to do media. Quickly sending you a sad smile, he followed.

As soon as the boys cleared out from morning skate to head to do media, you started getting the benches ready for the game; getting the water bottles filled, making sure there were enough sticks, and checking that all the pucks were there. You took your time, as you still had quite a bit of time before you had to head to meetings with other staff members.

Shortly after staff meetings and lunch with Mae were done, you got a text from Zach, your assistant trainer, saying that the Islanders were in the process of getting settled. Since you trusted Zach to take care of that, you took this time to check on any injuries that any players had to make sure that they were in the best shape they could be for the game today.

mattyb: psst. is the room clear? me and tito can’t be seen talking to the enemy

you’re good to come into the training room, idk what the hallway looks like though

When you heard the door close, you didn’t even have to look up from what you were doing to know who it was. Quickly turning around you saw two of your closest friends, “I didn’t think I’d actually miss you guys and here we are.”

“Did y/n y/l/n just admit to missing us? Did I miss something?” Tito said.

“Ooh, I think Philly has made her go soft. Let’s take a moment of silence for our fallen friend,” Mat added.

“Do you two ever shut up?”

“There she is,” Mat came over to you to give you a hug, Tito following behind.

“I’m surprised you willingly hugged me. Matty B, I’m the enemy here,” you said, causing Mat to roll his eyes at the nickname.

“Back at it with that stupid nickname.”

“Don’t worry, y/n/n, we both know he loves that nickname.”

The three of you took the time that you had to catch up, eventually ending up walking throughout the arena back towards their locker room. Wishing both of the boys luck, Tito walked into the locker room first, but you noticed Mat seemed hesitant on walking in. “What’s up?”

“What do you mean what’s up?” you asked, unsure of what he was meaning.

“No, I can clearly tell that something is wrong. Tito probably noticed too, he just doesn’t mention stuff like that.”

“Um, stuff is going on with me and Nolan. I don’t really know what, it’s just this really long story.”

“Did he do something? I’ll beat him up if you need me to?”

“No, no. Nothing happened, well stuff did, but nothing that you need to beat him up for.”

“Did you finally tell him how you feel? Did he reject you or something?”

“No, um, me and him went to a charity gala together, but only as each other's fake date. I didn’t bring it up as wanting anything else, but then some other stuff happened and now we’re in this awkward ‘we’re fine, but won’t talk it out’ stage. And it’s just hard right now,” you simply shrugged.

“You know, I don’t know much about him, but I’m sure there’s a lot that has been left unsaid for way too long and now it’s just needing to be out in the open. You two will figure it out, I’m sure,” Mat quickly gave you a hug, “now, I have to go get ready to win this game, so if you’ll excuse me.”

“Oh, be ready Barzy, my boys will kick your ass.”

“We shall see, y/n. We shall see.”

Once you saw that Mat had gone back to the locker room, you started making your way back to the Flyers locker room for pregame meetings. You still had at least 30 minutes before the meetings started, but you assumed that the boys would either be stretching or messing around. “You know, you talking to the enemy could get you fired, y/n/n,” you heard Joel say as he walked beside you.

“Hey, Beezer. How are you today?”

“I’m doing great. I’d be better if my favorite trainer wasn’t seen talking to the enemy,” he nudged you with his elbow.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. I didn’t spoil any secrets, I promise. No game plans were exposed.”

“Hmm. Wait til Nols hears about this one,” he paused when you visibly tensed, “you guys haven’t talked have you? That’s why morning skate was kinda wack.”

“Well, we have talked, but I don’t think everything that needed to be said was said.”

“So, why don’t you go say it? Simple.”

“He’s not saying much either,” you said, defensively to which he could only roll his eyes.

“Well both of you are acting like a couple of 14 year olds that don’t know how to talk to the person they like, no offense, but it’s annoying,” he said, matter of factly.

You knew Joel was right, he had simply said what everyone around you was thinking. You knew that what he had said the night of the gala was right. You knew what Mae had said about the two of you being a part of each other’s routine was right. You knew - although you would never say it to his face - that Mat was right, too.

Reaching down, you instinctively grabbed the necklace that Nolan gave you. You only looked up when you heard chuckling in front of you, “what?”

“Your first instinct was to grab the necklace he got you, it might not seem like a lot, but it says a lot.”

…..

Nolan stepped out of the locker room and quickly followed the boys towards the rink. He unconsciously kept an eye out for you, knowing that if he didn’t do the handshake it would throw him off. When warm ups started and he only saw Zach, he started to become worried. The handshake only had to happen before each period, but it often happened more than three times throughout the game.

Midway through warm up Travis nudged him, who pointed towards where you and Mae were walking closer. He watched as Mae nudged you and pointed in his direction, to which you quickly jogged over, “ok, sorry I didn’t get here before warm-ups. But here’s what’s going to happen ok: you go out there and kick some ass. Specifically so I can prove a point to Mat and Tito, but anyways, you go out there and you help win this game. Then once the game is over we figure out whatever is going on with us. Okay?”

Nolan’s smile only grew, he simply nodded. “Of course, you think I’d let your stupid New York friends win?”

“I would hope not,” you gave him a quick hug and watched as he started to walk away, “I know damn well that you’re not walking away without doing this handshake,” Nolan quickly took off his gloves so that you could do your handshake,“ there we go. Now you better beat them or else I’ll never hear the end of it.”

Once the National Anthem was over, the first period started. You already knew that this game would be a tough one, you knew enough about both teams to know that it would be a very close game. By the end of the first, the score was 2-1, the Islanders ahead.

After the intermission, both teams came back ready for more. You knew the signs of the Islanders getting cocky and you hoped it was noticeable, you and Nolan did your handshake one more time before he went back on the ice. About halfway through the second period, Nolan and Travis had helped get another goal, tying up the score.

As the team was celebrating your eyes found Nolan’s to which he simply pointed at you in response. You scanned the rest of the rink, only to see Mat and Tito pointing between you and Nolan, your eyebrows furrowed to which they only smiled in response. Oh no. You looked back to Nolan, who was skating back to the bench for water, only to see Tito approaching him from the other side.

You couldn’t hear what was said, but you knew that whatever it was caused Nolan to get angry. His eyes met yours once more and you only hoped he would ignore whatever was said. You let out a breath of air as he skated back to the bench. Nolan wasn’t on the ice for the next play, but you could see the way he kept his eyes trained on Tito.

You watched as Mat had the puck, passing it to Tito as they scored another goal. As they celebrated you visibly gaped as Tito pointed in your direction. You could see the smirk grow on his face from what you assumed was Nolan’s reaction.

You prepared for the worst when Nolan went back on the ice. TK, who was still on the bench, looked back at you with a questioning look. “This is bad, this is very bad,” you whispered.

“Pssh, he’ll be fine. He hardly ever-” before Travis could even finish his sentence, you saw Nolan and Tito’s gloves come off. “Ok, forget I said that.” You watched as the two boys fought, eventually both were pulled apart by the refs and were ushered towards the penalty box.

“Dumbass.”

The game continued and the two of them eventually got out of the penalty box. By the end of the second period, the score was 3-2, the boys only needed to get at least one point to be able to win the game. You were beyond mad at Tito and Mat for egging Nolan on, but you were also mad at Nolan for letting it get to him.

When you and Nolan did your handshake, you took notice of how his hands were already slightly bruised from the fight, but you would tend to that later. The game proceeded, eventually with both teams tied with only a few minutes left, so either someone would score or the game would go into overtime.

Everyone in the arena is on the edge of their seats, unsure of what the outcome of the game will be. Carter was able to block all of the Islanders attempts at a goal, which allowed the guys to be able to score without fear of a comeback from the Isles. With less than 20 seconds left, a goal is made by the Flyers. We won the game.

The atmosphere of the arena erupted in cheers and celebration, the boys crowding around on the ice. You smiled as you watched the team celebrate the win that they just had, your smile growing more when you saw that Nolan was once again looking your way. “He’s been looking your way the whole game and you want to tell me he doesn’t think of you as his good luck charm? Okay, y/n,” Mae said, interrupting your thought process.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. No need for that,” you said rolling your eyes, “You’ll meet me by the training room once you’re done?”

She simply nodded in response. Staying in the arena for a while as fans and spectators cleared out, you cleared off the benches and started making your way back to the training room. “y/n,” a familiar voice yelled from behind you as you passed the visiting locker rooms.

Turning around you saw Tito approaching, Mat following behind. “Look, I’m sorry about what I did. I shouldn’t have dragged you into it.”

“Yeah, you really shouldn’t have, but as long as you left it on the ice we’re cool. Just know that I’m not afraid to punch you out either. I appreciate the apology though, T.”

“Please don’t punch him again, but now that I know we’re cool. Can we just take a second and mention the reaction that we got out of Nolan?” Mat questioned.

“Exactly, I wouldn’t react that way unless I was literally in love with the girl. He’s whipped, dude,” Tito added.

“He’s not.”

“He is,” the pair in front of you said in unison. “It’s so obvious and the two of you are just oblivious,” Mat added. Before you could say anything else, you saw Anders emerge from the locker room, “hey, y/n. Your boys did good today.”

“Yeah, I know.”

“Always the humble one, y/n,” he sighed,”Anyways, what was up with your boy today?” he added.

“Well, Tito also chirped him, so I don’t think it was an all one sided ordeal,” you stated.

“Did you notice how he didn’t mention who he was talking about? He literally just said ‘your boy’ and you immediately knew he meant Pat,” heat rushed to your face at Mat’s statement.

“Anyways, you guys had a great game. Next time we play each other, we have to make plans and catch up more,” you quickly said your goodbyes and made your way back to the training room where a familiar figure was already sitting on one of the benches. “Hey, y/n/n.”

“Hey, Nol,” you set your bag down and quickly headed over to get some ice for his hand, “you’re a dumbass, you know that.”

“Well, I have you constantly reminding me, so yeah,” he smiled at the fact that the two of you fell back into your normal conversation.

“So, you want to explain why you got into a fight?” you already knew why he did, but something was telling you that you didn’t know something.

“Not particularly, but I know you won’t accept that answer,” he sighed, “he made a comment about him asking you out and I’ve already dealt with a comment like that about you before, but it really got in my head this time. And then he pointed to you after your goal and I don’t know.” As he ran his hand through his hair, his eyes finally met yours, “I got jealous.”

“Nolan Patrick, jealous? Never saw that one coming,” you walked back over towards him to assess his hand, “well your hand looks fine, you’ll probably just have to ice it for a few days.” Standing back up you noticed Nolan’s eyes on your neck, “what is it?”

“You’re still wearing the necklace I gave you.”

“Yeah, of course. Why wouldn’t I?”

“I don’t know, I figured you’d throw it away after what happened. I honestly thought you wouldn’t show up today or do our handshake and it scared me.”

Your eyebrows furrowed, “why did it scare you?”

“I, uh, after us not talking, I realized how much I need you in my life and I realized I love you a lot more than I thought I did before.” Your eyes widened as you realized what he had said, “you love me?”

“Is it hard that hard to believe?”

“I- I don’t know, I just didn’t realize how you felt the same,” looking up you saw Nolan’s face visibly light up. Before you could say anything else, he pulled you closer to him.

Brushing a piece of hair away from your face, he leaned closer, softly whispering another I love you before his lips met yours softly. Once the two of you pulled away, you simply smiled at one another.

“Yes, finally. Teeks, you owe me $20. Pay up,” Mae said to Teeks, both leaning on the doorway.

“You two couldn’t have waited another day for that,” Travis said, handing over the money.

“Oh, you might want to check Instagram really quick. Nolan, I assume you’re taking y/n/n home?”

The blush on Nolan’s face grew as he looked over to you for confirmation to which you nodded before walking over to pull your phone out of your bag. Opening Instagram, you went to the Flyers Instagram, taking note of a few new posts before seeing the most recent one captioned ‘Pre-game handshakes are definitely the most important part of game day’ with a video of you and Nolan doing your handshake before each game over the few years you had done it.

“Awe, Mae. Was this the secret project?”

“Yeah, now I’ll leave you two,” she said before walking away, only to come back a few seconds later, “oh and use protection, kiddos.”

#nolan patrick #nolan patrick imagine #nolan patrick x reader #nhl imagine #nhl imagines #hockey imagine

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meltwonu · 3 years

Text

| 🎃 𝕸𝖔𝖓𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖍 🎃 |

↪ ✦ baby ✦

this chapter pairing; yandere!the8 x reader

genre&warnings; yandere!au, softdom!minghao, ice play, wax play, blindfolds, shibari, sex toys, minghao taking ~pictures~, uh murder ☠️.

✖ That being said, I do NOT condone yandere-like/obsessive/possessive behaviour in real life. this is a work of fiction therefore I will indulge in it. If you do NOT like this kind of content, please just ignore it.

notes; the way yandere minghao would be fucking ✨pristine✨ when he's taking care of 😳business😳 if ykwim,,, WHEW the mind, she reels. also no I didn't make anyone suffer in this chap by killing off anyone important 😩😩 I know that hurts too much khjfkdjfh I've spared you all for the last yandere chapter LOL 💕💕 One more chapter to go!! Thank you, as always, for your kind comments and support 🥺 I love u 💕💕 See you tomorrow for our last Monster Mash chapter!! 🎃💕👻

word count; ~2000

chapters; 1 - 2 - 3 - 4 - 5 - 6 - 7 - 8 - 9 - 10 - 11 - 12 - x

checking locks;

turning knobs

i’ve been circling for block;

and i’ll never stop.

like a moth to the flame;

when you’re calling out my name

and i’m on my way.

A tear slips from your eye and immediately soaks into the blindfold over your eyes.

Where was Minghao? You think.

Your thighs tremble, soft cries spilling from your lips when you tug at the ropes that keep you only slightly suspended above the bed. The hitachi he’d placed against your clit had gotten you to cum twice now and your body was quickly reaching your limit as you tried to shy away from the vibrations of the toy.

Minghao had said he was going to take care of something and that he’d be right back, but it had surely been at least 30 minutes since then and the only thing you’d heard was the creaking of the rope suspensions and the sound of the hitachi vibrating against your swollen clit.

He’d really been gone for far too long.

You’re about to tug at your restraints a few minutes later when you hear the doorknob starting to rattle. Oh, thank god.

“Have you been good, sweetheart?”

Minghao’s sweet voice feels like home and you’re quick to reply; glad that he’d come back sooner than later. “A-ah, y-yes but, mmh, the--the toy…”

“Ah, is it too much?”

You nod, squirming slightly as you sway in the rope suspension. “I---I already c-came tw--twice, ‘Hao…”

He smiles at you, even if you can’t see. “Only? You’ve cum more than that before, when I’ve left you like this.” You can hear him laugh lightly and soon his fingertips run across your skin and the intricately tied ropes around your limbs and torso.

Minghao takes pity, turning off the Hitachi when he hears your soft whines. “I’m sorry I took so long, sweetheart. I didn’t intend for it to take so long.” Your body goes slack as soon as the toy turns off and you feel him tugging at some of the ropes as they loosen around you.

“Let’s get you into a more comfortable position, hmm?”

When Minghao moves to undo some of the ropes and lowers you down onto the bed gently, he also takes a moment to take pictures on his film camera of your body covered in the indents from where the rope had dug into your skin.

It’s for my collection, he says. Just a personal one.

You always agree and he always lets you see the finished product as the two of you admire the way he captures you in his camera lens.

When you’d met Minghao through mutual friends, he wasn’t very talkative, admittedly. It’d taken a while for him to open up to you and you to him, but once the two of you had found common interests, you had found that he was quite the talkative person with a wide array of interests and skills.

He was incredibly meticulous and preferred to be in control whether it came to his craft or in bed, which you didn’t mind at all.

Minghao knew what he was doing.

“What’s your colour right now, sweetheart?” “Mmh.. G--green, Minghao…”

The blindfold is still firmly placed over your eyes even when he redoes the ropes into a more comfortable position; and this time, your head rests against the pillows with only one of your legs bent and tied and your arms tied neatly in front of you.

“Always so pretty for me.” Minghao coos. “I want to try something new, okay? Just tell me if it’s too much.”

“Okay...”

You hear the clinking of a glass nearby and soon the chill of an ice cube meets your warm skin as you mewl. It makes goosebumps rise as he drags the ice slowly until he places it directly against your clit and your fingertips try to reach for his hands as you gasp.

“Oh, M--Minghao!” You writhe under him as he smiles adoringly back at you. He runs the ice cube through your folds, letting it melt slightly as he holds it to your soaking entrance.

“Is it too cold, sweetheart? Would you prefer something warmer?”

You shake your head yes, hoping he meant his fingers instead. “Please…” You feel the bed shift slightly and hear the clicking of a lighter and realize it's definitely not what you were hoping for.

“Colour?”

“Um… y-yellow…?” You answer; a little unsure. The lighter clicks stop. “Yellow? Tell me what’s wrong, sweetheart.” His voice is soft and gentle and you feel his fingers massaging your skin a moment later.

“I--I’m okay with it, just---it’s, um, it’s not going to b-burn, right?”

“Of course not, sweetheart. I would never do anything that hurts you. Would you like some water? Or do you want to take a break?” You bite the inside of your cheek, blushing underneath your blindfold that hid your pink cheeks and ears.

“M-maybe some w-water?”

Minghao helps you tilt your head enough for you to take some gulps of water, kind fingertips wiping at your lips and helping you ease back against the pillows when you’re satisfied. “Thank you, Minghao…” You whisper.

“Of course, baby. Everything okay, now? Still yellow?”

“Mm… ‘m green now~”

He gives it a second as his hands roam your skin, massaging your thighs and your bound arms before he positions himself back between your legs.

You hear the lighter clicking again, body tensing at the heat that you knew was coming.

Minghao tilts the small candle over your bound thigh, letting the wax fall over parts of your skin and the ropes as he licks his lips. “Baby, you’re so so good for me.”

You’re a little shocked that the wax wasn’t as hot as you initially thought it’d be; only a mild sting before it eased into a nice warmth and dried cold onto your skin.

He lets it drip a little more on your thigh before he moves it up; a trail of wax dripping from your thigh to your hip bone as you whine. “Ngh, ‘Hao it--it feels really g-good…”

“Do you prefer the ice or this, hmm? Which one feels better?”

It takes you a second to think; in all honesty, they both felt good in their own ways.

“Um, ah, I l-liked them both…” You pause, “They’re d-different…”

He hums in response, letting the wax drip onto your inner thighs as you tremble underneath him.

Minghao repeats this pattern a few times; moving from your thighs to your hip bones and even letting a little drip onto your arms before he blows the candle out and sets it onto the tray he’d brought onto the bed. He takes a moment to admire his own work, fingertips itching for his camera.

“Hold still, okay?”

“Okay, ‘Hao~”

You hear the camera shutter going off a few times as you lay still for him, waiting with anticipation if he was going to play with anything new after he’d taken his pictures.

“I can’t wait to show you these pictures, baby. You look incredible.” He mutters; too focused on getting the right angles.

“I can’t wait to see them too!” Smiling, you wished that Minghao would take the blindfold off of you, but you also knew to let him do his thing as he wanted it.

It needs to be perfect, he’d say. There’s only so many free spaces on film.

“Sweetheart?”

“A-ah, yes?”

This time, you jolt when you feel his thumb on your clit and you easily let out a choked moan as you slightly tug the binds. “You’ve been so good for me, baby. I think you deserve to cum one more time.”

You nod shakily, lips parted. “Pl--please… ‘m so sensitive a-already…”

Minghao doesn’t respond, instead, he rubs your clit harder; relishing in the way you squirm and buck your hips up to meet his hand. You clench around emptiness as you chase your high, simultaneously wishing he fucked you instead.

“Ngh, Minghao...”

“You can cum, baby. Whenever you want.”

You imagine Minghao fucking you, cock grazing against your g-spot. And it was a feeling you knew well; toes curling as you let your imagination run wild. You imagine him between your legs, tongue teasing your clit and your soaking entrance as you tangled your hands into his hair and his hands wrapped prettily around your throat when he made you feel fuzzy and lightheaded.

“O-oh, I’m---I’m cumming!”

Your body tenses up one last time, back bowing off of the sheets as he continues to rub your clit; working you through your orgasm as his name rolls off of your tongue.

Another tear soaks into the blindfold as you ride out your high and your entire body buzzes with electricity and mild overstimulation when Minghao doesn’t let up.

“M--Minghao, I--I can’t...” You cry, thighs shaking uncontrollably.

You hear him chuckle and he immediately takes his thumb off of your clit as you catch your breath.

“I’m going to take the blindfold off now, okay, baby?” Nodding tiredly, you raise your head to the best of your ability as he reaches behind you to undo the knot and slip the silk material from around your head.

You’re thankful the room was already dim as your teary eyes start to focus on Minghao.

There’s still bits and pieces of wax on your skin and soaked into the ropes when you look down at your body. “Hi...” You whisper, cheeks hot.

“Hi, baby. How about we get you undone from these ropes and into a nice warm bath, huh?”

Confusion crosses your features, “What about you though?” He smiles gently, eyes twinkling with warmth.

“Let me worry about you, baby.”

Minghao makes sure the water is warm and to your liking before he helps you ease into the tub; bubbles spilling over and onto the floor.

“I’ll be right back. Don’t fall asleep, okay? I’m just going to grab you some water.”

You nod in return, resting your head against the porcelain.

Minghao was so sweet.

Minghao clenches his jaw once he steps back into the bedroom. Eyes scanning the dimmed space to make sure he hadn’t tracked in any unnecessary dirt or grime.

There was still so much he needed to clean before anyone found the body.

And it was really foolish of your boss to try and fire you, honestly. And to send you home crying? Just unacceptable.

Minghao wouldn’t let anyone get away with such actions. Not towards you.

Although, maybe it was a little foolish of Minghao to make such a damn mess in his fit of rage.

Ah, well.

He’d wait for you to sleep before he’d slink out of bed to finish what he’d started.

After all, Minghao was very meticulous with his work.

#yandere!the8 #yandere!minghao #the8 smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #minghao smut #yandere!svt #yandere!seventeen #the8 scenarios #the8 imagines #minghao imagines #minghao scenarios #seventeen scenarios #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #svt scenarios #the8 #minghao #monstermash!svt

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cocogukkie · 3 years

Text

2020 in review: kdramas (the heart fluttering, the disappointing, the saviors of 2020)

it’s december 31st! the new year is quite literally upon us (some of y’all are already in 2021) and my procrastinating self has chosen to upload this today. i’ve always loved these rec lists and I wanted to do one for 2020! this year was a rollercoaster for kdramas with some excellent ones and some not so excellent ones. i watched all of these in 2020 but not all of them were released in 2020.

if you want to use my questions to make your own list please do!! or give your favs in the tags, i’d love to read them. (fair warning, some of these have multiple answers bc i just can’t choose one!!)

drama that made me laugh

When The Camellia Blooms (2019)

i finally got around to watching when the camellia blooms this year and it. was. so. funny. oh my goodness, the comedic timing in so many scenes was pure excellency and im kinda mad at myself that i didn’t watch this last year. this isn’t just a comedy for those who are interested, its a thriller/romance but its also so fucking funny. definitely watch this if you want to laugh (and be touched bc the emotional scenes in this one are beautiful)

drama that made me cry

Sweet Home (2020)

hahah….. um this one is gonna go to sweet home friends. i went into this one with zero expectations and the first couple episodes didn’t really wow me? but i kept watching and holy shit fam. this show really picks up story-wise around ep 4 and makes the viewer love a lot of these initially unlikable characters. all i can say is that the end was devastating for me and i cried quite a bit. (warning, there are a lot of mature themes in this one so make sure you look for trigger warnings or send me an ask and i’ll list them all out for you)

best OST

Itaewon Class (2020)

i loved the ost for itaewon class!! the music is just so inspirational and pump up music, its so good. my favorites are ‘you make me back’ by woosung and ‘start’ by gaho.

drama with chemistry royalty (aka the best couple)

i have three for this one because i just cannot choose one.

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay (2020)

we recognize this one as one of the best things to come out of 2020. go moon young and moon kang tae have some of the best chemistry i have ever seen in a drama couple. i waited on the edge of my seat every single week for the next couple of episode just so i could fawn over these two. they work so well together, lift each other up, and so fucking funny together and support one another. while they’re not the chillest couple (lmao) they’re most certainly one with the most personality. they’re so cute and bicker and they just get each other. who could ask for more.

Flower of Evil (2020)

our badass mom and dad 😭😭. this was another peak drama that came out this year and our married partners-in-crime-but-not-really had amazing chemistry. baek hee sung and cha ji won were so cute as a married couple but they were even more precious later on in the drama after certain things unfolded (no spoilers). they both just get each other and protected one another as well as on the most precious kdrama children this year, their daughter eunha. they were so wholesome, flower of evil is so very worth a watch.

Into The Ring (2020)

this was one of the more underappreciated kdramas of the year but hoo buddy was the main couples chemistry top notch. they were so friggin cute and i just couldn’t. goo se ra is highkey one of the best female characters i’ve ever seen, she’s absolute chaos, lawful chaos, but chaos nonetheless. her other half, seo gong myung is opposite from her as lawful neutral. he’s just along for the ride that is se ra and loves her. they’re both so very fond and protective of each other and back each other up!! very very cute and you’ll definitely replay more than a couple of their scenes together.

most disappointing

Record of Youth (2020)

it’s sad but true… i went into this one with so much hope and excitement (i was riding off that ‘psycho but its okay’ high) and i was vastly disappointed. the plot mostly focused on the male lead, and there wasn’t much characterization for the female lead which i didn’t like. honestly, i only cared about maybe 3-4? characters in the whole drama. the rest were absolutely terrible or plain boring and i ended up skipping eps 14 and 15 and just watched the finale. i would not recommend tbh.

drama you can’t really get through

Crash Landing on You (2019)

this one is absolutely on me, i want so badly to love this one. but i just… can’t seem to get past ep 2? i’ve tried!! i swear, but i just cannot get through it. maybe in 2021, i can try again and i’ll enjoy it more.

drama everyone else liked but was meh

Kairos (2020)

i though kairos was a bit predictable tbh. i know those of us who did end up watching it really liked it but maybe its because i watch so many crime/mystery shows that this one didn’t really do it for me. the writing is quite solid and everything connects well, i would recommend that those who don’t really watch thrillers, to watch this one. (also the friendship between the female lead and her two friends is suuuper cute and worth it alone to watch kairos)

favorite romance

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay (2020)

yeah… this one wins again lol. what can i say, i just loved it so much and the main theme of the show is romance (its also a comedy and a mental health/healing drama) all i can say is watch this if you haven’t yet, its definitely worth it!!

favorite mystery

Memorist (2020) & Watcher (2019)

i really enjoyed these two mystery dramas. both were super fun to watch and very kinda unique in their own ways. i liked memorist because it was lowkey funny and i liked the relationships between the characters, but most importantly i couldn’t guess the main antagonist by the end! i really thought i knew who it was and then i was completely wrong lmao. watcher was also very good, the main trio had really good chemistry and i really cared about all the characters. (also i’ll never say no to watching seo kang joon) plus the plot twists threw me a bit at the end which is always a feeling i welcome, i love being surprised and wrong (as long as it makes sense)

favorite slice of life

Hospital Playlist (2020)

oh my goodness, i was late to the hospital playlist party and i regret it because this show is so. so. good. its just a slice of life following 5 friends who are doctors and work at the same hospital together but its so much more than that. this is honestly one of the first shows i’ve seen that are optimistic? in the show, every time i thought a plot was going to play out a certain way (usually negatively, as tends to be life unfortunately) it surprised me by taking the more optimistic wholesome route. characters in subplots changed for the better, became more understanding, chose to do the right thing, etc. if you want a feel good drama where the main characters have wonderful platonic chemistry and just care about each other but is also super funny, watch hospital playlist!! (season 2 is coming out early 2021 and im so pumped)

favorite fantasy

The Untamed (2019)

this one is a cdrama but i watched it in 2020, mostly because of how many people on the internet were adamant that the rest of us watch this and ngl they were v right. the untamed was very very good and im really glad i gave it a chance and watched it, its also my first cdrama ever. the chemistry between the male leads is honestly what makes this show and its worth the 50? i think? episodes. to be completely honest the fanfiction for the show are peak and if you do watch this, go straight to ao3 and you will not be disappointed.

dramas that saved 2020

The Uncanny Counter (2020) & Run On (2020)

these two dramas are among those that started airing at the end of the year and will go into the beginning of 2021 and absolutely saved the end of 2020 for me. while neither of these are finished, both have been excellent so far and worth starting. uncanny counter has the best use of the found family trope i have ever seen. i fucking love the four counters and their relationship with each other, how protective they are of one another. they all have amazing chemistry and the actors have amazing chemistry in the making films.

run on has one of the cutest couples that will definitely make my best chemistry list for next year. i didn’t put them on this list bc they actually haven’t gotten together yet but once they do, they’re gonna be freaking adorable, i can already tell. there’s no specific grand events propelling the plot forward, but just following the lives of these unique, interesting and relatable people who have casual yet entertaining conversations with each other. the show is super soft and the main couple are so straightforward and honest (plus theres mutual pining!!)

best dramas of the year

here are my best dramas (and one movie) watched this year, no further explanation given lolol. just watch them and enjoy because these are fucking excellent in the feels department. trust me 💞

It’s Okay To Not Be Okay (2020)

Flower of Evil (2020)

Itaewon Class (2020)

Hospital Playlist (2020)

One Spring Night (2019)

Midnight Runners (2017)

Hot Stove League (2019)

I hope this gives you some fun stuff to watch!! or convince you to start that drama in your watchlists!

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plant-flwrs · 3 years

Note

Hiii, i love your writing. I was wondering if you could do a remus lupin imagine. Were its mutual pinnin but they dont know the other like them. And sirus gets tired of it and takes pollyjuice to look like remus and get you to confess🥺

under the mistletoe // remus lupin

masterlist!

a/n: oh my god i’ve been non-stop reading atyd and it is my new obsession. it’s completely canon to me now. ty for ur request! i used they/them pronouns because you didn’t specify, so i hope that’s alright <3 oh! also! im gonna try this new thing w my fics to see if they flow better that way; instead of just jumping in time i’ll put a little indicator (-). wanted to try it out, dunno if i’ll keep using it. i’m so excited for christmas and this put me in an even more christmasy mood omg

summary: Staying at Hogwarts for the holidays seemed like the best way to avoid distractions, but with the Marauders there, distractions were guaranteed. Especially when your crush on Remus proves to be incredibly distracting.

cw: underage drinking (hangover vomiting), swearing (harmless, classic Sirius things)

(8k) (haven’t written this much in so long wow i forgot i could)

----------

The Gryffindor common room was your most favorite place in Hogwarts. It was warm and comforting, and you had some of your best memories there. With just a glance around the room you could feel your entire school career in just one room.

Though, now that you were in your sixth year, it wasn’t the leisurely place it used to be.

All around you, books touched any bare surface there was. N.E.W.T.’s were sooner than you’d like, sooner than anyone liked, and you were filled with anxiety. You knew your strenuous studying was a bit soon, but you felt like you had the weight of the world on your shoulders.

You felt so stressed, in fact, that not even Lily Evans could convince you to go home for the holidays that Christmas.

“Exams are months away, Y/n!” she sighed as you fell down onto the couch beside her, narrowly returning before curfew from the library, “You ought to enjoy Christmas.”

“I will enjoy it. Here,” you said, rolling your head back and closing your eyes.

You felt sore, as if you had run a marathon, but you had been locked away in the library all day.

Part of you, the smallest part, blamed Remus Lupin for this newfound obsession. Your fellow Gryffindor, the most studious boy in your year, was the initial reason for your new studying habits. You had started going to the library in an attempt to steal glances at him, an innocent crush that you most definitely let overcome you.

Remus had always gone to the library, you knew that, but ever since your O.W.L.’s he seemed to take extra pride in his work. You couldn’t blame him for secluding himself in the library, for that was the only place on campus that it seemed his rowdy friends did not go.

“You can’t enjoy Christmas alone,” Lily tutted, pulling the massive textbook off your lap and putting it on the table in front of you.

“You’re staying for the holidays, too?”

Sirius had just bounded down the stairs from the boys dormitories, his usual mischievous smirk on his face.

“Yes, they are,” Lily answered for you, turning to look at Sirius as he hovered behind you near the stairs.

“Well, that’s lucky,” he said, acting as if he had a secret he took pride in no one else knowing.

“Why is that, Sirius?” Lily sighed, becoming annoyed.

“Remus, James, Peter, and I are staying, too,” he said, smirk turning into a boyish smile.

“You are?” you opened your eyes and turned to face him, finally.

He met your gaze and nodded excitedly, seeming to already have the Christmas spirit in him.

“So you won’t be alone!” Lily said excitedly, then turned towards Sirius with a more dull tone, “Not the best company, but at least not alone.”

Sirius scoffed in mock offence, scrunching his face up with imaginary tears as he stomped back up the stairs.

“God, that lot is so bizarre,” she groaned, turning back to you on the couch to see you dozing off.

(-)

Snow fell on the grounds of Hogwarts, and you gazed at it from a fogged up window in the library.

Lily had gone, Mary had gone, Marlene had gone, just about everyone had gone. You had never stayed at Hogwarts for the holidays before, and you knew not many people did, but you expected more than there were.

No Slytherins had stayed, which was a welcomed absence from those who did. You knew the two Hufflepuffs that remained, but only because you had classes with them in your fourth year. The Ravenclaws that stayed, there couldn’t have been more than five of them, were often holed up the in the library with you. There were the most Gryffindors, five, including you and the marauders.

You were almost surprised that James had gone through with staying; Remus had mentioned wonderful things about the Potters and the Christmases they hosted. Still, he was here, cheerful as ever.

As your eyes blurred with tiredness and the window became nearly too fogged to see through, you sighed in frustration.

You missed your family, you missed home, and you really regretted staying at school. You decided to give yourself the day off from studying. With a glance down at your watch, you saw it was nearly lunch time anyways. You had slept in and missed breakfast, coming straight to the library, and your stomach felt empty.

You made your way to the common room, wanting to drop off the heavy books you had accumulated. Mumbling the password to the portrait, you stumbled through without noticing the rowdy conversation coming towards you.

You ran right into James’ chest, stumbling back and already mumbling an apology.

“Y/n?” he asked happily, as if he had been looking for you.

“Hey, guys,” you sighed, forcing a polite smile when all you really wanted to do was collapse on the couch and sleep for days.

“Sirius told us you were staying, but I’d thought you’d changed your mind. Haven’t seen you since the holiday started!” James’s booming and joyful voice made you want to cringe away, but you couldn’t manage anything less than a small smile at his kindness.

“I’ve been in the library,” you explained, chuckling at the horrified look on three of the four faces.

“You’re worse than I’d thought,” Sirius started, cut off by a sharp elbow to the ribcage by Remus, which only seemed to encourage him.

“We can’t have that,” James finished for him, a mischievous twinkle in his eyes.

“Oi,” Remus started, casting a sympathetic smile at you as he tried to stop his friends from potentially insulting you.

“Why don’t you come have lunch with us?” Peter squeaked from behind James as he glanced at the two dark-headed boys for some sort of approval, “We were just on our way down.”

“What a great idea, Wormtail!” Sirius boomed, earning himself another elbow to the side from Remus.

You glanced nervously at the boys in front of you, trying to discern if they were setting you up for a joke or teasing you.

“You don’t have to-” Remus blurted out, his cheeks pink, “-I mean, if you’re busy with your studies. I know how hard your working-”

“Nonsense, Moony!” James smiled, levitating your bag off your shoulder and easily landing it on the floor somewhere behind him, “they have to eat!”

You chuckled, ducking your head down as James slung his arm around your shoulder and escorted you back through the portrait hole.

You felt lighter immediately. Whether it was the absence of your heavy bag, or the way the boys’ easy conversation and laughter felt so inviting and warm, you did not know.

The self-pity you had been feeling only a moment ago seemed to go, too. James kept his brotherly arm around your shoulder all the way to the Great Hall, where he split his path and sat across from you. Sirius followed you down the isle, continuing his teasing conversation with Peter. James sat between Remus and Peter, his smile never faltering. He acted as if eating lunch with his mates and their tag-along was the best thing he had ever done.

Remus was quiet, almost shy, but you knew that. You had known him your entire time at Hogwarts, and the crush you had on him seemed to last that whole time. You had seen him come out of his shell as the years went on, but he didn’t seem nearly as comfortable as when he was with his friends.

You stifled your laughter with the back of your hand, blushing slightly at Sirius’s rude joke as he bumped his shoulder into yours. You looked down at your plate, pushing around the mashed potatoes that had grown cold.

“Sirius!” Peter yelped, his eyes wide in shock as he nervously glanced to you.

Sirius had made a crude joke, you knew that, but you hadn’t heard it. You and Remus had been meeting in short bursts of eye contact and the small action alone was making your spine shiver.

You looked up from your potatoes, seeing the boys fading with laughter and delve back into their food. That was something you never understood about boys; they sat down, ate and ate until they were done, and then got to talking. You, Lily, Marlene, and Mary could talk for hours while you ate, but the boys seemed unable to do more than one thing at once.

The thought brought a fond smile to your face, and you felt something bump against your shin. Looking up from your plate, you met Remus’s eyes again.

“What’s got you smiling?” he asked, his voice kind with a teasing nature behind it.

James looked up from his plate in the middle of shoving what had to be an entire chicken breast in his mouth, and began cooing at you as your cheeks flushed.

“’M just happy you lot stayed,” you blushed, refusing to meet Remus’s eyes, “would have been dreadful without your company.”

Sirius, without missing a beat, threw his arm around your shoulders and drew you into his chest. His large hand went to your head, ruffling up your hair. You cringed away, giggling and attempting to lay your hair smooth.

Everyone’s cheers in agreeance died down, and James roped Sirius into a heated discussion about Quidditch as Peter hung onto his every word.

“‘M happy you stayed, too,” Remus mumbled from across the table, his head ducked down as a blush was creeping up the back of his neck.

You fought the urge to break the eye contact, giving him a smile so wide that your cheeks burned.

You all returned to the common room with full stomachs and wide smiles, courtesy of James, who had just announced his newest plan at getting Lily’s attention. You just finished listing off all the reasons she would hate it, and he clambered through the portrait hole with a dazed smile that a lovesick puppy would have.

You trailed behind the boys, watching them all fall onto comfortable couches and armchairs. You looked at your limp backpack indignantly, choosing instead to follow them.

You curled up in an armchair that was across a large couch occupied by James and Sirius and to the left of another armchair occupied by Peter. Peter leaned forwards to rest his elbows on his knees, setting up a new chess game for him and Remus to play. Remus sat on the ground, eyelevel with the board. He noticed you looking at him and gave you a kind smile that made you look away, blushing.

The night was spent in leisure. You had barely wanted to get up for dinner, even Sirius suggested making Peter go down to the kitchens so they wouldn’t all have to go to the hall. In the end, you all went, having just as much of a good time as you did at lunch.

You wished them a goodnight after you fell asleep watching Sirius and Remus levitating the most valuable things they could find in the room, sending Peter into anxious fits every time they pretended to loose their balance. You groggily walked up the stairs to the dormitories, leaving your homework downstairs with a satisfied sigh.

For a few moments before you fell asleep again, Remus’s brilliant and bright smile was burned behind your eyes.

(-)

“You’ve got to be kidding me,” Sirius groaned, throwing himself dramatically onto the couch with a huff.

“Shud up,” Remus groaned, falling into the armchair you had been sitting in. He could smell you on the chair, your scent floating into his nose like it was intoxicating.

“Really botched that one, mate,” James said with a chuckle, picking up a few of his Quidditch magazines off of the floor and putting them back on the coffee table, where Peter had accidentally knocked them off.

“Romance is confusing! How was I supposed to know?!” Remus groaned, lifting his head from his hands with a desperate look.

James gave him a knowing smirk, and Sirius groaned again.

“It was obvious! You always offer to walk a romantic interest home,” Sirius said, twirling his wand in his hand.

“They were just going upstairs,” Peter mumbled, seeming to agree with Remus.

“It’s alright, Moony,” James said, standing from the couch with a look of determination, “you’ve got all week to seduce them.”

“Shud up,” Remus groaned, repeating his request from earlier.

His eyes fell to the stairs you had climbed moments ago, remembering the peaceful look on your face as you slept, the adorable stretch you did once you woke up, the tired way you climbed the stairs, and that beautiful smile you gave them when you said goodnight.

Remus decided to stay in the common room for a bit longer once his friends had went upstairs, trying to force every second from the time you spent together that day into his memory permanently.

(-)

You woke up feeling more rested than you had in weeks. The sun was barely in the sky when you opened the curtains, your unusually empty room flooded with orange light. You dressed quickly, donning muggle clothes that you found incredibly comfortable.

You went down to the common room, seeing that the mess the boys had made last night was either cleaned by them or house elves. There was no sign of life in the Gryffindor tower, besides yourself, so you assumed the four were still soundly asleep upstairs.

You found your backpack, overflowing with loose papers, and shrugged it onto your shoulders. You had decided to get some work done today, seeing as your day off the day before was not scheduled.

You ate a quick breakfast in the empty hall, finding it odd and strangely discomforting to be in such a large room by yourself. It felt as if you were out past curfew.

The library was the same case. Madam Pince was not even at her desk yet, and you settled into a table by the window. You opened it a sliver, enjoying the cold winter air that seeped into the room. The sunlight warmed you, and the wind was gentle enough to not rustle your papers.

You dove into your work, feeling considerably better than yesterday, or the past month. Your muscles were loose, and the pressure you had been putting on yourself was no longer there. One night of fun proved to be harmless, and so did the marauders.

You smiled at the thought of it, at the thought of your little day with Remus. He had been so kind to you, so funny and charming. You had never liked someone as much as you liked Remus.

You found your gaze drifting out the window, looking past the castle and Hagrid’s hut and out into the Forbidden Forest. You couldn’t think of anything but the curly headed, dirty blonde boy. The way his eyes nervously darted to yours, his sheepish smile. The way he could easily make James, Sirius, and Peter fall into doubled-over laughter, almost as if good-naturedness came to him as easily as walking did.

The sun rose in the sky, and it was almost time for lunch. Even with your mind distracted, you had gotten done more work than you had expected. You decided that if the boys asked you to have lunch with them again, you wouldn’t decline.

It was as if your thoughts were read, because just as you were organizing your papers to put them away, Remus walked into the library. You fumbled a bit, realizing you smudged some fresh ink on your newly written Potions notes. You didn’t care, though, smiling widely and waving Remus over.

“Alright?” he asked groggily, rubbing his eyes as if he had just woken up.

“Yeah, you?” you couldn’t help but stare at him. His voice was deep and thick with sleep, and he pulled the sleeves of his sweater over his slender hands. He had a muggle novel tucked under his arm, and he put it on the table as he sat down across from you.

“Eh,” he started, looking at you with slight amusement, “James woke up at the crack of dawn to go to the pitch, and he woke up Sirius when he did. Sirius is a git if he gets woken up before noon.”

“That’s not a surprising piece of information,” you chuckled, setting down your papers and getting comfortable in your seat again.

“Yeah, best to stay out of the dorm when Sirius is in a mood. Peter went to ask for some extension on a paper he forgot to do,” Remus smiled fondly at his friends flaws, opening his book and propping it on his knee, “so I figured I’d come find you.”

“You found me,” you opened your ink bottle and dipped your quill into it, going over your Potions notes and fixing the smudged ink.

You were a bit disappointed by Remus’s reasons for coming to see you. Part of you had hoped he missed you, or enjoyed your presence. But the truth was that you were his only other option for company. Your chest deflated slightly as you stole a glance at him only to find him deeply invested in his book. Many conversation starters bubbled in your throat but you couldn’t bring yourself to voice any of them.

It was about an hour of silence in the library before Remus suggested lunch. He helped you pack up your things, humming under his breath as he led the way out of the library.

Lunch was soup, which you didn’t mind too much. Sirius was already at the table with James when you arrived. Remus sat next to you, across from his friends.

Sirius had his head propped up in his hand, lazily bringing soup to his mouth before dropping the spoon into the bowl with a clatter as his eyes fluttered shut. James rolled his eyes, shoving the bowl of soup away from him and wiping up the splattered mess from the table.

James eagerly dove into a cheery conversation about his solo Quidditch practice, and Remus reluctantly listened. You felt as exhausted as Sirius looked, even though you had a wonderful nights sleep. You hadn’t felt so tired until your upsetting thoughts about Remus, but now you could barely keep your eyes open. You hadn’t been sitting for more than ten minutes, your soup was barely eaten, but you just wanted to curl up in your dorm.

Peter came into the hall, filing down the row where you had Remus were sitting. He was getting close, and you stood.

“Here, Peter, have my seat,” you said, slowly standing as James’ face contorted with confusion. You could see him working out pleas for you to stay, and your heart warmed a bit.

“I’m gonna have a lay down,” you excused, not waiting for Sirius’s head to lift from his hand or for James to suggest all of you walking back together.

As you walked away, you heard Peter begin to chat about his essay extension.

(-)

Remus knew he had done something wrong. He knew it.

You had seemed happy to see him, you smiled at him, you were friendly, but at some point he said something to make you close off. He was looking forward to spending the morning in the library with you. He had made up the excuse of getting out of the dorm, knowing that with Pete and James gone and Sirius out cold, it would be fairly peaceful. Remus, however, wanted to see you.

You looked heavenly dressed in casual muggle clothes with the morning sun lighting your face. He was happy to sit with you, but you didn’t seem happy to sit with him.

He wondered if you were bothered by him and his friends. If yesterday hadn’t been as fun as he thought it was, and if you just wanted to be left alone. He felt a surge of annoyance with James for being so forward, but quickly drowned that out. It wasn’t James’s fault.

Remus stared into his bowl of soup, not listening to Pete as he complained about the essay he had to write.

James indulged Pete, listening to his complaints with sympathy as he dipped his bread into his soup. Sirius, however, could not be bothered.

He had come to attention when you left the table, watching your hunched shoulders and nervous hands pushing your hair off your face. He had even caught your sad glance over you shoulder at Remus before you finally turned to go upstairs. Sirius was thinking, he was thinking hard. He could read you and Remus like an open book. He had known you liked Remus since you started showing up to the library whenever Remus did, no matter how subtle you thought you were being.

Sirius looked at his friend, confusion knitted in his eyebrows as he hunched over his food. He gasped silently, catching James’s attention, as his eyes lit up with an idea.

(-)

For the next couple of days, it was not hard to avoid your fellow housemates. James and Sirius seemed to be sneaking off as often as they could, clutching their cloaks close to them as if they had something underneath them.

You avoided Remus, who presumably only had Pete to keep him company now, by staying in your dorm. The library wasn’t the only place you could study, and you spread your books all across Lily’s bed. You had begun to enjoy studying in your dorm, it was private and quiet, with no Madam Pince staring you down from her desk.

It wasn’t that you disliked the marauders’ company, because you didn’t. You really liked hanging out with the boys. You had just wanted to prevent any more heartache when hanging out with Remus. You had obsessed over your last interaction in the library, convincing yourself it would be best to stay away from the boy as to not attach yourself any further.

It was nearing the weekend, Christmas on the upcoming Saturday. You didn’t want to be in solitude on Christmas, but your pride prevented you from asking to hang out with the boys. You didn’t know what Sirius and James were up to, and you didn’t want to know. You didn’t feel like hanging out with Peter, because being in his presence alone made you just as anxious as he was. And Remus, Remus was an entirely different story. Just seeing Remus made your heart race unnervingly.

On Thursday night, you crept down the dormitory stairs and into the common room. You stopped and waited to hear for Peter and Remus, but it seemed they were still in their room. You were going down for an early dinner, hoping to eat quickly before everyone else came down.

You seemed to be successful, your plate was nearly cleared and there was no sign of anyone else. You were serving yourself pudding, your favorite pudding, when someone sat across from you.

You looked up. Your throat closed involuntarily, and your spoon froze on it’s way to your mouth. You straightened your back, eyes widening at the sight of him, and wiped your mouth nervously with your napkin.

“Hey, Remus,” you said, smiling politely at him as he began to dish himself food, “where are the rest of the boys?”

“Just me,” he said, his voice sounding a little higher than usual.

“Are you alright?” you watched him carefully as you noticed his posture was straighter than usual.

“Yeah,” he chuckled, looking at you now.

You looked at him, squinting your eyes. He seemed off, but you figured he could be nervous without his friends around.

“Okay,” you trailed off, returning to your pudding.

“Haven’t seen you much, recently,” he said confidently, the usual softness in his voice absent.

“I’ve just been up in my dorm,” you said, still gazing at him cautiously.

“Don’t want to spend time with Sirius, James, and I?”

You bit your lip, looking at him with a serious expression. Remus never excluded Peter when he was talking about his friends, but Sirius often did. You noted it, unsure what that could mean. Had Remus asked Sirius on advice at how to talk to you? The thought made you suppress nervous giggles.

“No, it’s not that,” you felt your cheeks warm under his blatant stare, “you know how crazy I am about the N.E.W.T.’s.”

Remus chuckled under his breath, slowly eating his pudding. This was also weird, because Remus usually devoured any food in front of him as if he was a starving animal.

“Remus, are you sure your alright?” you squinted at him, dropping your spoon and propping your chin up with your hand.

“Yes, I’m fine,” he said nonchalantly, squinting back at you.

He had remarkably less patience and ease than usual.

“Okay, well, I’m done eating. I think I’ll go back to the tower now,” you stood slowly, watching his face contort with urgency.

“Wait!” he called, standing too, “wait, come sit for a second.”

You joined him again, clearly suspicious. You wondered if he was distracting you while the boys set up a prank.

“I need to ask you something,” he whispered seriously, leaning closer to you over the table.

“What?”

“Do you fancy me?” he smirked at you, mischief in his eyes.

At first you wanted to shrink away, blush madly and sputter out lies to conceal your true feelings. But you didn’t. You kept his stare, a blank face looking into his daring one. You decided to make a guess.

“Sirius?” you said confidently, so it didn’t sound like a wild guess. You knew it was crazy. Surely, Sirius would never transfigure into his best friend to eat dinner alone with you and ask him about your feelings for him. Surely.

“How did you know!?” he asked, his voice now completely Sirius’s instead of his weird imitation of Remus’s voice.

“What!?” you questioned back, surprised that you were right, “It’s actually you, Sirius?”

Sirius’s face, well, still Remus’s face, dropped with disappointment, upset that he gave himself away.

“Yes,” he mumbled, moving his hand to tuck his hair behind his ear, only to remember Remus’s hair wasn’t that long.

“What are you playing at? How did you do this?” you motioned your hands at him, sounding more amazed than angry.

“Polyjuice Potion,” he said mischievously, his eyes meeting yours at the tone of your voice.

“That’s really advance stuff, Sirius,” you said, slightly impressed as you leaned back and crossed your arms.

“I had some help,” he said sneakily, and suddenly what he and James had been sneaking off for made sense.

“Are you two planning something? Testing out the costume on me?” you said excitedly, hoping the boys would let you in on whatever prank they had planned.

“Well, about that,” he said, rubbing the back of his neck, “you sort of were the plan.”

You looked at him, confused. It felt weird to be talking so casually with Remus, and you fought the urge to blush every time he looked at you, knowing it was actually Sirius.

“I know you fancy Remus,” Sirius said, sounding a bit guilty.

This time, you could not resist shrinking away and blushing. You looked down at your lap, feeling incredibly embarrassed.

“But,” Sirius started again, his voice oddly comforting and kind, “I know Remus likes you, too.”

Your eyes shot up to meet Sirius’s, your face becoming somehow even more flushed.

“You were trying to get me to admit it to you? That I like him?” you asked him, heart racing.

“I just wanted you to confirm it,” he said, sounding even more guilty, “I didn’t want to try and set you two up if you didn’t like him back-”

“Set us up?!” you interrupted, eyes wide.

“Yeah,” he said casually.

“How do you plan on doing that, then?” You tried to sound annoyed in an attempt to hide just how excited you were.

Sirius had waved over James immediately, who has hiding behind a pillar in the courtyard looking in on you and Sirius. The two began talking almost as animatedly as two schoolgirls stricken with an exciting prospect of romance.

You watched, lazily propping your chin on your hand as they rambled on about the ways they thought you should confront Remus.

James had been quite keen on them influencing Remus to confront you, and Sirius reckoned you ought to “grow a pair” and kiss him yourself. James was nearly affronted by the idea, insisting on a classic and romantic gesture from Remus’s behalf.

Either way, you couldn’t fight an embarrassed blush that seemed permanently glued onto your cheeks. You swallowed heavily at any mention of kissing, which was being discussed at length. You had half a mind to stop the hopeful ramblings, but James and Sirius were Remus’s best friends, they had to be somewhat right about his feelings for you.

The conversation got remarkably easier, too, once the potion had warn off and it was Sirius in front of you instead of a fake Remus.

You looked into the courtyard, enjoying the cold air lofting into the room through the open doors, when you noticed Remus and Peter entering the room. The cold air had been helping in cooling your cheeks, but at the sight of Remus’s wide and carefree smile, they warmed immediately.

“Shut up!” you mumbled harshly to the still ranting dark-haired boys in front of you, kicking them each in the shin for good measure.

They looked offended, but Sirius caught your eye and smirked once he realized why they were silenced.

“Have you guys eaten already?” Peter asked, sounding disappointed as he sat next to you and saw your empty bowl of pudding.

��Just had an early lunch,” James said merrily, moving to scoop himself another bowl of pudding after he had eaten an entire lunch while he and Sirius were talking, “but we’ll stay while you guys eat.”

You swallowed hard, looking at James with wide eyes as he quirked an eyebrow at you. You were planning on leaving the second Remus sat between James and Sirius, right across from you, but now you couldn’t be so obvious.

“Haven’t seen you in a while, Y/n,” Peter mumbled from beside you, stuffing his face with a large heaping of peas.

You looked to Remus almost automatically, only to see him looking questioningly at you. You couldn’t resist the small smile that flirted on your lips as he averted your gaze quickly.

“I can’t get much work done with you lot around,” you teased, clearing the table in front of you and resting your elbows there, “I’ve been in my dorm, most days.”

“What about for Christmas?” Peter pried curiously, “Will you leave your dorm for Christmas?”

“Of course they will!” James boomed from across the table, causing a few tired looking Ravenclaws who were just coming in to glare at him apprehensively, “Starting Christmas Eve, they won’t be able to get rid of us.”

“Oh,” you looked to him, eyebrows raised in entertainment, “I won’t?”

Remus looked between you and James with an excited smile.

“Of course not,” Sirius said for James, picking a carrot off of Peter’s plate from across the table.

“For a limited time,” James said mysteriously, “you will have the honor of becoming a temporary Marauder.”

“They what?” Peter said from his goblet of pumpkin juice, causing some to splash back in his face.

“Peter!” Sirius groaned, annoyed with the boy, “Get in the holiday spirit!”

“Don’t worry Pete, just for a limited time. The holidays are a season of extending great charity to others,” James said, talking with humor in his tone.

“Charity?” you repeated, an amused smile on your face.

“We don’t let in just anyone,” Remus said, looking only at you.

When your eyes met his, you felt all the air leave your lungs. Your jaw clenched in an attempt to gather some sort of consciousness, but all you could do was look back at Remus.

“That’s true, ‘tis a great honor,” Sirius had raised his goblet in some sort of toast, and you had barely noticed until Remus was raising his glass.

You broke the contact, finally, and sputtered for a moment before you could find your goblet on the table. You rose it, hoping to lower it quickly as you noticed a slight tremble in your hand. Remus connected his goblet with yours gently, looking at you again while you were intent on avoiding his eyes. He had some sort of knowing smile on his face, and you felt very exposed to him. It felt like he was reaching in your chest and squeezing your heart for his own pleasure, and it scared you to know you could not tell him to stop.

(-)

Christmas Eve was very celebrated amongst the boys.

So celebrated, in fact, that Sirius insisted Christmas morning was a day for hangovers.

He had brought out the firewhisky fairly early into the afternoon. James had looked at him with nervousness, but nonetheless took a heaping sip when offered a glass. You sipped casually, not feeling all too comfortable with the chaos that seemed to lurk in Sirius’s eyes.

By the time the sun was beneath the horizon, Sirius and James were dancing some sort of Irish jig on a table, and Peter was very angrily talking to himself in a mirror. You and Remus, neither of you having very much to drink, sat comfortably on a couch, watching the night unfold.

“Why aren’t you drinking with them?” you asked Remus, glancing at his full cup and tensed shoulders.

He glanced down at you, nervously biting his lip and running a hand through his hair. Oh, how you wanted to touch his hair.

“I don’t really feel like being hungover on Christmas,” he said, noticing your full cup as well, “what about you?”

“I don’t think Lily would ever forgive me if she found out I got drunk with you lot on Christmas Eve,” you teased, smiling to yourself at the fond thought of your friend.

“I miss Lily,” Remus remarked simply, bringing his cup to his lips and taking a large gulp.

“Me too,” you sighed, doing the same and hoping it would ease your nerves, “she wrote to me yesterday. She’s having a lovely Christmas. Her sister is being awful, but that’s per usual.”

You and Remus shared a knowing smile, both thinking of the complaints you had heard from Lily about her sister.

“Have you written back yet?”

“No, not yet. I was going to wait until after Christmas,” you were waiting to write Lily back so you could thank her first for the undoubtedly wonderful present she got you. You didn’t know how, but Lily Evans always gave the most thoughtful presents.

“When you do, tell her we miss her,” Remus said softly, his cheeks beginning to flush pink as he watched with a smile his friends dancing.

You nodded, ducking your head to hide a smile.

“Oi!” James yelled, stopping his dance suddenly.

You and Remus froze as he looked at the pair of you, each wearing an entertained smile. James hopped off the table with ease, as if he was not drunk out of his mind and as if the table wasn’t a good four feet off the ground.

“Come dance,” James said once he finally reached the both of you, though, only offering you his hand.

He waved his wand at a muggle radio they had in the corner, and the volume increased. Sirius smiled widely, refreshing his drink with the dwindling amount of firewhisky left. You cautiously took James’s hand, letting him spin you as you giggled.

James caught Remus’s eye, the blonde boy watching you with adoration. James pulled you close, resting one hand on your shoulder as the other held your hand, and leaned in close to your ear.

“Moony is watching you,” he slurred, sounding excited, “I reckon he’ll make a move tonight if Sirius doesn’t finish all the liquor for himself!”

James pulled away, giggling once again like a schoolgirl. You could not help his infectious laughter, your forehead falling onto his shoulder as you laughed loudly. As if on que, Remus stood and walked with determination to Sirius. He took Sirius’s goblet and downed it, smiling widely and accomplishedly afterwards. He climbed on the table with Sirius, who had long forgotten about his stolen alcohol, and began awkwardly moving his lanky body in a way that could be called dancing in the most generous of terms. This made you laugh even more, and James had to nearly fully support your weight as your knees buckled with your hard laughter.

It was shaping up to be a lovely Christmas Eve.

(-)

Christmas, as Sirius had predicted, was a morning for hangovers. You had barely glanced at your mounds of presents at the foot of your bed, instead throwing on your warmest sweater and going immediately to breakfast.

It had been decorated, as it had all week, with great care. Today, however, the tree had been alit with wonderful and delicate decorations, sparkling under the enchanted ceiling. The entire room somehow smelled of pine, and the warm feeling of a fireplace shot down your spine when you sat down.

You cradled a cup of tea, hunching over and fighting the urge to fall back asleep at the table. You couldn’t bear to look at food yet, regretting the glasses you drank once Sirius had found that second bottle of firewhisky.

There was no sign of life in the castle, besides the lovely decorations, and you found yourself grateful.

It was as if, however, that you cursed yourself the second you thought this.

“Merry Christmas, Y/n!” James shouted from the entry way of the castle, his loud voice assaulting your ears even from such a distance. Beside him, Peter, Sirius, and Remus cringed away in pain, shrinking down and walking past him into the hall.

“Bloody. Fucking. Hell,” Sirius groaned once he sat down next to you, his head hitting the table as soon as he was still.

Remus sat on the other side of you, going at once for heaping servings of the hot food. You swallowed the vomit in your throat at the sight of so much food, forcing your eyes deep into your tea. James happily sat down next to Peter on the other side of the table, patting his friend merrily on the back. Peter winced audibly, a pained look on his face.

“How are you not hungover?” you whispered once you were sure you would not vomit.

“He never gets hungover,” Remus groaned from beside you, his mouth full of beans.

“Never?” you repeated, wincing as you reached for more tea.

“Never!” James said happily, obviously enjoying his wonderful, wonderful gift.

“Oi!” Sirius groaned, his head still buried in his arms.

James smiled.

“Eating helps, really,” Remus said from beside you, glancing an earnest look at you as he wiped his mouth with the back of his hand.

“Mmmmm,” you groaned in response, ducking your head down as Sirius was doing to avoid vomiting.

“What a lovely Christmas this will be!” James said, earning a unanimous groan in response.

(-)

Getting back to the tower was a slow and painful process that included many bathroom breaks and headaches. You and Sirius had both ducked into the loo twice each to vomit, and James supposed it had something to do with climbing the stairs. Peter was limping for some reason, though you could not remember him hurting either of his legs the night before. Remus was nearly as recovered as James, just looking a bit tired.

After you were sure you had emptied your stomach of the tea you drank for breakfast, you were feeling a bit better. Your legs felt a little wobbly, and Remus must have noticed, because he offered his arm for you to steady yourself on as you walked along. Your mind was so foggy you almost had not noticed, but his strong arm beneath your fingers was enough to clear you up a little. You held him close to you, hoping the hangover was excuse enough. James gave you and encouraging smile, nodding enthusiastically. You were sure Sirius would be giving you a smirk if he wasn’t basically crawling down the halls.

Once you reached the common room, Remus had not retracted his arm. In fact, he had interlocked his hand with yours, still with your arms looped, and led you over to a couch. He sat very close to you and still did not remove himself from your grasp even as you were sitting. You felt so comfortable and warm next to him, you could not help but close your eyes and let your head fall on his shoulder.

(-)

James retreated upstairs with Peter. Peter had wanted a quick and undisturbed nap, and James returned downstairs a few moments later with his practice Quidditch robes on. Sirius had collapsed on an armchair the second he crawled into the room, and showed no indication of life as he fell into a deep sleep. James gave Remus an encouraging smile and two thumbs up, but did not dare to speak in case you weren’t asleep. Remus rolled his eyes, but was truly quite happy with the position he had found himself in.

Your arms were looped, hands intertwined, and your head rested delicately on his shoulder. He leaned his head against yours, breathing in the smell of your shampoo.

He had wanted to stay there forever.

(-)

When they all awoke, James was out of his Quidditch robes and in a thick wool sweater. He was polishing his broom with what looked like a new polishing set, perched on the armrest of a couch across from you and Remus. You had woken up when Sirius did, his loud yawns and stretches filling the room. When you lifted your head, you bumped into Remus’s head, and he woke up. Your cheek felt sore from pressing into his strong shoulder, and you looked down at you hands to see them still interlocked. You were sweaty and tired, but Remus looked down at you sleepily with complete happiness.

“Happy Christmas, you lazy bones,” James tutted like a mother would, putting down his broom and standing.

“Happy Christmas,” Remus said, smiling widely.

You sat up, removing yourself from Remus. He untangled your arms, removing his hand from yours. You felt sad at the absence, looking down at your lonely hand. Remus was looking too, and when you met his eyes he bit his bottom lip. With some slight hesitation, he wrapped his arm around your shoulder and pulled you in for a side hug. You lingered, and he made no move to pull away, so you stayed there, tucked under his arm.

“I never looked at my presents this morning,” Sirius said, standing from his chair and motioning for James to follow him.

“Neither did I,” you said to Remus only, hearing the other two retreating upstairs.

“Want me to walk you up to your dorm?” he offered, adjusting his body so he could see your face.

You uncurled from him, nodding excitedly.

You stood from the couch, walking over to the stairs. You waited for Remus, watching as he slowly stood and stretched. You leaned against the door frame, supporting yourself on your hands behind you. Remus came over to you, walking slowly with a sleepy and dazed look on his face.

“Happy Christmas,” he repeated, only to you this time.

“Happy Christmas,” you said, smiling at him as he leaned against the door frame opposite of you.

It was a narrow space, and there were only a few inches between you two, but neither of you made any movement. You wanted to go upstairs and see what your family had sent, what Lily had given you, what all your friends had given you, but you couldn’t tear yourself from the handsome boy in front of you.

Your eyes danced all over his face, admiring his curly and unkempt hair that fell into his dark and kind eyes, his sharp jaw that you wanted to run your fingers across, his soft lips.

You were both so entrance in each other, that neither of you had noticed the greenery sprouting from the door frame above you. It was mistletoe, sprouting from the wooden door frame between you and Remus. Remus noticed, his eyes darting up at it. He looked down at you, seeing you had not noticed it, and chuckled.

This seemed to snap you out of it, and you stood upright, coming closer to Remus. You looked up at the growing plant, eyes widening when you saw the red berry forming before your eyes.

“Mistletoe?” Remus chuckled, entertained as he reached up and brushed it delicately with his slender fingers.

“Is it?” you managed to say, watching his hand.

“It is,” he said, retracting his hand and bringing it to rest on your cheek.

He gently cupped your face, pulling you close to him until your chests met and neither of your backs were touching the door frame. You closed the distance, meeting his lips with urgency and desperation. You didn’t care if James thought Remus ought to kiss you, you wanted nothing more than to kiss Remus. And Remus wanted nothing more than to kiss you. His other hand came to your waist, pulling you flush against him as his hand on your cheek moved to the side of your neck. You reached up and slid your hands from his shoulders to this neck and into his hair, feeling the soft curls between your fingers as you had wanted to for so long.

Remus pulled you impossibly close to him, as if he wanted nothing to come between you, until his force was moving you to lean against the door frame. The feeling of the wood was unexpected, and you gasped into Remus’s mouth when you felt it. Remus took this as an invitation to deepen the kiss, and you allowed him, sighing softly as his tongue explored your mouth.

“Mistletoe?!”

You and Remus broke apart, his hands still on you even though your bodies were no longer touching. You both looked up the stairs, seeing James, Sirius, and Peter looking down at you.

Sirius had the most mischievous smirk you had ever seen, sure that it would make Lily’s skin crawl if she saw it. James seemed so content that you’d think he’d just been kissed and Peter anxiously twirled his fingers as he averted your eyes, obviously feeling bad for interrupting.

“Mistletoe,” Remus said, his voice husk and his lips wet. It took a lot of will power to not sigh at the sight of him, or pull him in by his collar and kiss him again. Instead, you looked up at the boys like a deer caught in headlights.

“You owe me ten galleons,” James said to Sirius, causing Sirius to groan.

“How do you know he kissed them?!” Sirius complained, digging in his robe pockets for the money.

“He didn’t, I kissed him,” you said, looking up at Remus and licking your lips nervously.

“Hah! Hand it over, James,” Sirius gloated, removing his hand from his pocket and holding it out to James.

James groaned, still a smile on his lips, and handed Sirius the money.

“You didn’t think I’d kiss them first?” Remus asked Sirius, pulling you into his chest in a loving and protective way.

“Sorry, mate,” Sirius said with no remorse in his voice, climbing down the stairs and pushing past you and Remus.

James and Peter followed him, all fiddling with some new gift they had gotten. You looked up at Remus, deciding your Christmas presents could wait until Boxing Day, and pulled him out of the door way. You fell onto the couch, Remus following you, and you fell easily into conversation with the boys. Remus wrapped an arm around you, pulling you into his chest.

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the-midnight-feline · 3 years

Text

¤¸¸.•´¯`•¸¸.•..>> So this piece is actually part of the Piliin mo ang Pilipinas Collab event hosted by @lumpiang-toge, you guys should seriously check this out since the works posted there are such good reads ❤️️<<..•.¸¸•´¯`•.¸¸¤

this is the first time i've joined a collab, (ngl i thought i was waaay in over my head lol) i'd like to thank a friend of mine, Dylan, (won't tag his blog just cause, loves you for reading it !) thanks so much for the encouraging words ❤️ and of course Mama Rae (@hq-girl-next-door) for the advice on the banner**❤️

**For the banner I did, I took the image from pinterest, if you guys know who the artist is, please let me know so I could properly give credit to them :)

Tags/TW: Mutual pinning-ish, friends to lovers, fluff to angst, Cheating, swearing (I think theres one or two in there)

(A/N: Please don't get too confused /-\, the italic parts is you recollecting the past, it comes and goes (。♡‿♡。))

WC: 3.8k ;-; didn't know it get that long

Pairings: Tendou Satori x fem!Reader

Summary: It all started with a simple crush, you wouldn't have guessed that it'll be more than that, It was a dream come true to loved and be loved by the person you loved, but not all dreams end good, some end as a nightmare.

“You like the Guess Monster, like THE Guess Monster?!?!” your friends shouted in unison, looking at them frantically as you’re in the gym watching the guys warm up for a practice match and the way they shouted had the sounds of balls hitting the floor just below where your group sat, you willed yourself to look at the who were the people below you guys trying repress the blush you feel creeping on your cheeks, swallowing that lump on your throat as you peaked just a little over the ledge and saw his red hair. Internally cussing out your so-called friends, you tired to act like you calm and collected as he was looking up at the bleachers, maybe trying to guess which one in your group, who was also looking over at whoever heard them, liked him, shaking his head, chuckling toward Ushijima and Semi who was already making their way to the court to get this warm up started.

A single tear began rolling down your cheek as you remembered how it all began, your friends’ sudden outburst in the gym gave you the opportunity to talk to the guy you’ve been crushing on when you first saw him in the opening ceremony just something about him drew you to him and you were adamant on getting to, at the least, know him. Sitting on the floor of your shared bedroom, opening the memory box you and your husband made a few months after you started dating.

Semi knew your friend, he actually liked her and from that outburst of theirs at the gym, he 89immediately thought of a way to hit two birds with one stone. “hey, y/f/n, I heard you guys at the bleachers, sooo” scratching he neck out of shyness “which of your friends like our Tendou? Maybe we could setup a date or something?" He really liked your friend and would honestly do anything to get her on a date, she pointed to you, the quiet in of the group, usually the source of rationality and guidance, the one that acts like the mediator of the group. You really always kept to yourself, didn’t really want to attract attention towards yourself. Semi was skeptical at first, you the quiet, shy girl of the class liked that loud ass friend of his? Maybe y/f/n was pulling his leg, she can’t be serious.

A bitter laugh escapes your lips as the memory of your first date comes crashing on you as see the pressed flower from the little hole in the wall café near the school, Semi was the one that found that café and planned every detail of the date.

As you and your friend were walking towards the café Semi told her about, you were itching to just keep hitting your friends back “why the hell did you fucking agree to this?!!” you hissed at your friend, you were practically shooting daggers at her for saying yes on your behalf and you didn’t even know what she agreed to but she told you to get dolled up, silly you, thinking that it’ll be just a girls day out, but peering over her shoulder as your guys walk out of the dorm, you see her texting Semi, thinking maybe it was him asking for notes since they were in the same class. She led you to this small café and you guys sat at a corner booth, making you sit inside by the wall, you really thought nothing of it, until you saw that distinctive red hair bounding towards your booth. Your palms got a tad sweaty, nerves getting the best of you, a million thoughts racing in your mind that you didn’t notice that the Tendou Satori was there taking the seat opposite of you in the booth, the ever infectious smile directed towards you and you alone. Seeing as you and Satori were basically having a silent conversation with just your smiles, Semi and your friend made a discreet exit and left you two be. Little did you know, he often saw you around, he knows you like shounen jump as much as he does since he sees you go to the store he usually goes to, he knows what snacks you liked since he usually goes out at the middle of the night to get some snacks of his own at the convenience store around the corner. He sees you in the library with your nose buried in some book when he follows Semi there just to annoy him. Tendou didn’t tell anybody about the girl he liked from afar, he knew he’d scare you off, no one wanted to date a Monster, or that’s what he thought.

Looking back, that impromptu date was what started the relationship with Satori, a soft sob escapes your lips as tears gently fall on the first picture you have together, he suddenly rang you up and asked you to go to the mall with him. In the picture, he had his arm wrapped around your shoulder while you were hugging his waist tightly, seemingly scared that being with him was a dream you don’t want to wake up from.

Getting out of the shower, you hear your phone ring from under your pillow, confused as to who might that be since it was an unknown number calling you, curious you answered it. “hey y/n! I know it’s kinda out of the blue but, you wanna go to the mall with me?” shock was evident in your body, it was Tendou! Your thoughts was scrambling, you know you didn’t get a chance to give him your number before you guys parted ways on your first meeting since Coach Washijo made Ushijima contact both guys for a weekend practice. You knew the coach was a hot head and would make anymore run 50 laps if they were late and that was a few weeks ago, a worried Tendou called out to you again “uh…y/n? If you have other plans I totally under-“ blinking back to the present “I’d love to go! Lemme get ready and I’ll meet you down” you cut him off midsentence hearing a small chuckle at the other line “don’t make me wait too long ok?” he said in a teasing tone which made you giggle on the line “yes, yes Satori, I’ll hang up so I could get ready ok? See you!” it took every ounce of self-control to not shriek the whole conversation, once he hung up you were practically jumping on your bed out of pure joy, but then you remembered that he’ll be waiting, you quickly snapped out of it and looked through your dresser for a decent outfit for going out with Tendou, you quickly settled with a simple get up of a long sleeved shirt and pants with some sneakers on, you excitedly exited your room, to meet up with Tendou, hoping you haven’t made him wait too long, turning the last corner you see him outside your dorm, almost wearing the same thing as you, even the color of your shoes match, biting your lip to stop a stupid smile from taking over you walk up behind him, gently poking his side, his sudden jump made you giggle as he took in all of you, a smile makes its way on his lips and eyes as he himself lets out a chuckle. “y/n? Are you copying me?” shaking your head, letting a small laugh out “Satori, please you’re the one copying me here” he just shook his out of amusement when he saw the glint of teasing in your eyes before he offended his arm to you like a gentleman would, the small action made you faint blush.

You two spent the day just walking around the mall, just browsing from store to store, having just a blast at all the random comments he makes, the last stop you guys make was the arcade, you guys played all sorts of games, air hockey, tried your luck at a pachinko machine and Tendou even tried the basketball game, which he surprisingly good at that he won a lot of tickets getting you a small rubiks cube, but near the back of the arcade something caught your eye, a purikura, Tendou saw where your eyes went and with a small smile he took your hand and walked towards the machine, and ushered you in the booth, he felt at comfortable around you, he would’ve never guessed that you were a crack head like, random outbursts of ideas and thoughts spouted from you made him laugh as you spent time together. He quickly wrapped an arm around your shoulder, pulling you close to him, a flash went off, that was the first shot, with the blush creeping on your cheeks you hid your face under your hair and hugged him another flash went off, that was the second shot, he tipped you head up, making you look at him, his infectious smile directed at you as another flash went off, and the last shot was of him kissing your forehead. You were left speechless after that whole scenario, seemingly in a dazed as he guided you out and grab the prints of the photos. That’s how you guys ended the date, he held your hand in his all the way back to the dorms, placing a chaste kiss on your cheek as you parted ways.

Rummaging further through the memory box, you see all the mementos you both kept from your dates, a few fallen leaves, a couple of pretty rocks, stickers, napkins, flowers, pictures, the cork from the bottle of champagne you drank at your wedding. More tears fell from your eyes as you dug through all the stuff in the box, who knew you both collected a lot of things in just a couple of years. What made you sob so hard was the acceptance letters you both got when you were selected as the few students for the incoming year.

A few months before graduation, you both got accepted into a culinary school in Tokyo, you were ecstatic as this means you and Tendou could get a place together since your parents already gave you two a small amount to get a place near the school so you two could still practice and create new dishes together, it was really no surprise to your friends or the whole volleyball team that you two would get into culinary school, you’ve always had a thing for cooking, you’d often come their practices with some bento boxes for all of the guys so they don’t have to go out and spend for food, on the weekends, the kitchen was his domain he’d let you watch him bake and oftentimes let you help him out. It’s often that the whole group get together during the weekends, you cooking for them while Tendou makes that dessert. For some reason, they got jealous of how your relationship started, it was as if all the pieces just fell into place at the right time, you two together just seemed right like you two were always suppose to be with each other. There’s always been a carefree air around him, it calmed you down so much that it helped you be more open or that’s how you saw it. You were the opposite of him always worrying, always, over thinking, being overly critical of your actions and how you overwhelmed with everything so you turned to anything that’ll help you divert your mind but once he was in your life it just got easier. He voice would immediately calm the voices spewing negative thoughts I had your head.

Looking around your room, you see pictures of you together, your graduation picture, the picture of you guys on the front of the school, the picture of your guys graduating culinary school, a photo of you two at the restaurant where you two both apprenticed and next to that was the candid shot of his proposal there, a mix of joy and hurt shoot through you as you the memory come rushing back to you.

The way he sheepishly confessed that he asked the manager if he could do his proposal there and invite your family and friends for that surprise. “Hey y/n, come with me, a customer just complained about the sauce you made being too salty, I’m not taking blame for that!” an angry chef came shouting at you, shocked and anxiousness dunning through you, you timidly follow behind him, thinking how you could screw up a simple sauce like that, your thoughts were everywhere, but once you stepped outside the kitchen you noted that the dining area was dimmer then usual, but maybe that’s because you’re used to the bright lights of the kitchen, you hear a soft melody playing, it’s one of your favourite songs ‘I Choose' you’ve always related that song to your relationship. On the far wall you see photos of you together, looking around you see familiar faces, his and your parents, your friends, the Shiratorizawa boys were there even the coach came!

The euphoria you felt from having everyone who had been part of your relationship through the ups and downs just had you in tears, your head was fuzzy with the mix of a dozen emotions swirling in you, through a blur of tears you see him kneeling in front of you, he let out a huff of breath to calm his nerves before asking you the question “y/n, my love, my baby, my better half, my paradise. You’ve stuck by my side through my highs and lows, loved me unconditionally, took care of me whenever I got sick, urged me to follow my dreams, guided me into being a better guy, especially with my chocolate making you supported my dreams like no other can, you, you made my world complete, you made me feel things I haven’t felt in a long time, you gave me your heart to cherish and protect. You made my life whole” the words flowed out of his mouth so freely, every word making more tears come out of you, every word so heartfelt, with shakey hands we presented you a pear cut yellow emerald ring “My Paradise, would you do me the honor of being my paradise for eternity?” no words could express how happy you were nodding your head, trying to stop happy tears from falling a hushed ‘yes’ slips past you lips as he stands to slip the ring on your left hand, pulling you in for a tight hug, whispering endless I love you’s and thank you in your ears as the people around you cheered for the newly engaged couple.

Biting back another sob, you feel fresh tears streaming down your cheeks as your eyes land on your wedding photo above the bed, he loved you enough to marry you, he was yours and you were his, you can’t help but stare at the framed photo, he had that infectious smile of his that made you fall from him the day you saw him. He has you up in his arms as your arms were wrapped around his neck, pecking a sweet kiss on his cheek. You asked him many times if he’d like to blowup another photo from your wedding, he simply shook his head and wrapped you up in his arms “you’re perfect in any picture of us, but in that one you look like the most perfect human being in existence and I’m just lucky to have you in my life” you basked in his love and affection on those simple words pulling him closer and burying you face on his chest, inhaling his sweet scent “I’m lucky to have you Tori, lucky to be called your wife” placing a chaste kiss on his chest as you look up to him with love-struck eyes. This was it you guys moved countries after your wedding to France since Tendou was offered a job at a famous pâtisserie there, all you wanted was your husband happy, wherever you guys may be.

You never really cared where you two were, as long as you were together, you could get lessons on the French cuisine as Tendou works, that was the plan before you guys flew out. You worked hard to learn the basics, you’d often have Tendou taste test all your creations and you’ll you the same for him since he likes to experiment with different flavor combinations, things were great the first few months of moving cross countries, you enrolled in a cooking classes there to build up your repertoire and after a few weeks of learning a few new techniques you've decided to look around for places you could work at just to keep your body busy again. You've decorated the apartment the way you liked it and how you think Tendou would like it, just adding different odds and ends giving it a familiar vibe. This place was your starting ground.

When you got a job at the nearby bistro, Tendou didn’t really mind it, since he’d often come home a bit later then usual saying something along the lines of making things in the experiment lab with the other chocolatiers at the shop to have something new for the upcoming season, in turn you thought nothing of it since you do work nights after getting a gig in a restaurant in town as well, it also means you could still have time to make his dinner and keep it warm for when he gets home. You two actually got into an argument when you got that gig since Tendou was adamant about keeping you in the apartment after the morning shift at the bistro so you don’t work yourself too hard, he wanted to start thinking about getting a kitten to keep you company when he’s out working but you argued back that you didn’t wanna feel like mooching off of him even though he said it was fine, he loved coming home to a warm meal that you made with love and gets more time to spend with you, but he did cave in after a few bats of your eyelashes.

It was perfect, you both were doing what you were passionate about, you two scheduled your offs near each other’s so one could take care of each other after a long day. But there was this weird feeling creeping in you but you simply don’t know why it was there, you and Tendou always kept communication open since you two do work different shifts and that itself puts a strain in the relationship but you two made it work. You loved him. So you would really sacrifice anything for him, he had have a rough childhood, he was bullied cause he looked different, acted different, but he wasn’t like that for you, he never was, even though he had a wicked sense for things which really surprised you, you can’t even hide a gift from him cause he knew what you’d get him or more likely sense what you’ll give him.

You don’t tell him that you swapped shifts with someone so you technically have a day off so you decided to drop by the pâtisserie where Tendou worked with some home made Pan Bagnat since it was nearing lunch, as you were close to the shop you saw his figure near the window placing new confections on display, but something made you stop, another person, a female chocolatier, was hugging him from behind and not in a friendly way, there was familiarity to it, it looked as if she’s been hugging him for so long, like she’s always hugged him, you didn’t notice that you’ve dropped the basket you were holding on the sidewalk, the glass bottle shattering on impact, the sangria spilling on the pavement, the sandwich you made, making a mess, the fruits you packed rolling in every direction. People around gasped at the scene, some tried to help in picking up the fruits that escaped, your mind in thought again, maybe you just interpreted it wrongly they’re just so so close, like a brother and sister kinda way, since they both work in the shop, you simply jumped to conclusions too fast, those thought completely vanished as the next sight you saw.

She kissed him. SHE KISSED HIM!! Your mind played that in your head like it was a song played on a loop. That was what made your heart break, that was the tipping point, he didn’t push her away, it was the opposite, he pulled her closer, the way he held her mirrored how he would hold you when he came home from work, people around you were asking you things trying to snap you out of your trance but you paid no mind to them, your legs moving on their own.

It was as if you were on autopilot, you got home, your mind racing with so many thoughts, how long had that been going on? Is she why he’d come home later than usual, is she the reason he had woken up earlier to get to work everyday? Did he spend his days off with her when you suddenly get shifts? Walking into your apartment, you didn’t know what to think, how to feel, how to make sense of things more questions come into your mind. Does he bring her here? Did they do anything sexual in the place you called home? What places were safe? Did she please him better than I did? You walked into your bedroom where the memory box laid in the middle of bed. It was your first wedding anniversary, did he really forget? Your anniversary was engraved on your wedding rings with your initials on it.

A scream of agony escaped your lips as everywhere you looked at it was all you and him the very place you thought was the safest of all was not. It's tainted with infidelity, your heart broke even more as you took the box from the bed with shaking hands contemplating on whether to open the box or not, he loved you with every part of him didn’t he? You were enough weren’t you? You made sure he was satisfied right? You gave him all the love you could and even more right? Didn’t he promise you that he’d protect your heart? You're still his paradise right? He loves you right?

Maybe opening the box, and finding something that you both placed in there would make him rethink his choices right? With broken sobs and uneven breathing, your fingers shaking as you pulled the pretty red ribbon that held the lid shut, looking at all the things that you both collected that reminded you both that you loved each other you broke even more. Every one of them held the promise of love, of fidelity, of trust. But now, a part of you is doubting every word that passed his lips, every kiss that landed on your skin made you feel dirty, every I love you's he uttered seems like a lie. You didn’t want to feel that way, you love him with every part of your being, you’re THE Mrs. Satori Tendou, no one else but you had that title, just you, it was only you right? You were his paradise for eternity right? Right?

★──────────★───────────────★─────────★

I hope you guys liked this, I actually really liked working on this one(played my brokenhearts plays it nonstop for it) , but I do have another one coming so...yeah!

Song inspiration :Anong Nangyari Sa Ating Dalawa by Aiza Seguerra

Song used in the proposal I Choose by Alessia Cara

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tallyovie-writes · 3 years

Text

Pictures of Us | f. w. Part 2

part 1

Summary: all the paintings choose a student to patron, the Lady chooses you and watches as you and Fred Weasley grow in the same direction

Warning:none, might contain little angst, nothing serious

2k words

@sirenswhispers @discoverablefeelings @capture-the-moment-on-camera @sophieswizardswheezes

Sixth year, December

The corridors buzzed with excitement. With only less than two weeks to the Yule Ball boys were running around in desperate need of finding partners while girls were frantic about not being asked. Of course the already paired ones watched the madness spread with a smug smile on their lips.

The Paintings also had the time of their lives, the new puppets on their chessboard gave back a little life to their fading colours. Now they could play matchmaker from an even bigger selection.

The Lady wanted to be proud to say she did not take part in such childish acts, but she had a mission with those two before the second task. It's not like she could do much, but occasionally if she heard a french boy talking about inviting her patron to the dance she faked sadness as she gave the poor boy the news that you were indeed taken.

You weren't indeed taken.

Madness has yet to engulf you, but you weren't calm either. Collita was asked by a bulgarian boy, but you had doubts whether there weren't threats made by her that overpowered the poor boy's common sense.

You would have been fine with the two of you going together, but now that she had a partner, you weren't planning on being the third wheel.

You forced these thoughts out of your mind for now. You had more important things going on.

The Lady's corridor was full of students as usual, so you weren't surprised when you entered the DADA classroom someone almost knocked you off your feet.

"Watch where you are goi.....oh..." you started telling off your attacker, but as you looked up Fred Weasley held eye contact.

Ever since that encounter in the potions storage room things have changed. You haven't really met after that, the two of you gave a wide berth to one another. No funny business, no prank. When you did run into each other, a sudden awareness filled your body. He made no snarky comments, his usual sarcasm nowhere to be found. You didn't bring up the secret of the castle, and he didn't bring up the date. Like an unspoken deal has been made without either of your knowledge. It was awkward at best. You didn't think anyone noticed, there was only bad blood between you before.

He didn't reply, he didn't apologize for running you over. He took a long look at your face, lingering on details only he could see. Without his usual grin, he left the scene as fast as he came, robes flying around him.

"What was that? Has something happened between you two?" seems like someone noticed after all.

"Nothing besides me agreeing to a date, him agreeing to let me in on a secret, and our mutual ghosting. How is your french boy by the way?" you feigned innocence.

Collita's jaw hit the floor.

"I'm joking. Don't get your knickers in a twist."

"You know I wouldn't even be surprised. With all the sexual tension you two radiate, I wouldn't put it past you that I could find you in a broom closet with him."

Now it was your turn to let your jaw hit the floor.

"Well then, good to know nothing is going on..."

Boy, if you'd known...

Sixth year, yule ball

It wasn't that bad of an evening. You could say it could have been quite magical. The house elves outdid themselves, even the usual house rivalry crawled back to its gloomy hole.

The icicles lost their naturally given cold arua just like the stone walls' usual grim facade. White dominated, but was quickly swept by the wide range of colourful dress robes, Dumbledore's glittery lilac fabric showing how it's done properly.

It really wasn't your date's fault either that you didn't really enjoy yourself. The poor boy tried everything, but besides polite conversation you weren't capable of anything else.

You were standing alone by the food table, the ravenclaw boy left a while ago to try his luck somewhere else, probably with bigger chances.

You saw Collita bent over from laughter silent tears running down her face, her date was watching her with parted lips in amazement. Eyes big, positive surprise written on his face. Collita did that to people. She was naturally gifted with a charming personality, she drew you in, spoke to you like you were on a pedestal.

She made you feel seen. A secret talent that you were rather jealous of on several occasions.

Suddenly you felt sick of the swirling mesmerized faces, the colours were too vibrant, the music too loud, too many bodies pressed together.

Before the walls started closing around you, you left your previous position and made your way to the exit that led to the gardens. The only sound that was registrateable to your ears were only your own footsteps.

Fresh air cut your rapid breathing shorter. You slowed down, the Great Hall's chokingly sweet smells started to fade away into the night.

"Wouldn't say rushing to the night with only a light silk material covering you was a smart choice, wasn't it? I took you to be a lot smarter than that, love. You're gonna get sick." a soft voice interrupted you.

Fred Weasley stood next to the bushes.

"Well, being sick would mean I wouldn't have to see your ugly face in class, so..." you replied but your voice lacked its usual fierceness. You were too tired.

He chuckled at your reply.

"I don't wanna go back there.." you started in a low voice, barely understandable, but gathered your poise and frowned as you said the last sentence. "They are too happy in there anyway."

"Is that jealousy in your voice?" he found so goodly which strings of you he should pull.

"And what if it is?" you snapped at him.

A ghost of his usual smug grin appeared on his face.

"Get your big nose out of my business by the way!"

"Well love, you know what they say about big nosed guys..." he lazily shrugged, hands in the pockets of his robe.

"Get lost, Weasley, I'm not in the mood today."

Maybe it was the hint of desperation in your voice, or the pathetic look you might have presented, but he stopped picking your brains.

"Come in, Y/S/N, you might even find the bloke of your dreams tonight." Fred tilted his head to the side.

"I'm not interested in 'finding a guy' to be my only goal." you scoffed at his remark.

"Well then, as the only guy you talk to right now, I feel obligated to spare you from the clutches of the cold and sickness, so pretty please get your ass in here."

"I'll stay until I decide it's enough. But thank you for your concern. Bye Fred Weasley, 'find the girl of your dreams' tonight." you rolled your eyes at him.

Little did you know, he already did.

Despite the cold, the Lady felt your frozen heart start melting, even if you haven't realized yet.

Sixth year, few days after the Yule Ball

"I don't understand why you thought it was a good idea to freeze your pretty little ass out there in a low cut silk dress in winter."

You groaned out in frustration.

Collita didn't spare you despite the fact that you were bloody sick, and fuckin hurting everywhere.

"Madam Pomfrey said you won highest fever of the year." she mentioned between stealing a few of your get-well sweets. "At least you finally won something." she winked at you.

"Get out, and let me suffer alone you bimbo!" you hissed at her, but the sharp pains shooting down your neck really destroyed to effect you were trying to achieve.

"Alrighty, my little pathetic friend, I suppose I can leave you to your demise. Be a good and obedient patient." she sent you a kiss and strolled out the Hospital Wing.

In the Hospital Wing, after curfew

After Collita left you to suffer on your own Madam Pomfrey gave you a light sleeping tonic. You welcomed the sweet oblivion in the place of pain.

A light noise disturbed the calming darkness. Opening your eyes was a too heavy task, so you relied on your hearing. A soft fumbling could be heard, but the person near your bed executed the deed quite clumsily as the most colourful swearing left their mouth.

Fighting against the tonic's luring effect, you tried opening your eyes. When you did, you almost jerked back in surprise.

Fred Weasley stood there with an innocent smile on his face, like a child caught in a naughty act, his hands were midair frozen on the spot hovering above your stack of sweets.

"What the fuck are you doing in the middle of the night standing near my bed?" you demanded and pulled your blanket further to your neck. "Are you setting up a prank?"

"Have a little faith in me, Y/N...if it were a prank you would only know it before it happened and that's already too late. Can't a bloke visit his sick classmate? The classmate he warned against the cold?" you scoffed at his pointed stare.

"In the middle of the night?"

He started scratching the back of his neck.

"Good point. A point I should probably elaborate on." he didn't seem like someone who wanted to elaborate.

"Don't let me stop you from doing that..." you rolled your eyes at him.

He seemed a little awkward and you could barely hide your amusement. It is not every day a Weasley gets a little intimidated and loses his usual cockiness.

"You see..." he started but his gaze was still fixated on his hands. "...I felt a tad responsible for you catching a cold.

Your eyebrows raised in surprise.

"If it weren't for me dancing on your nerves in the garden making you irritated enough to stay outside longer than intended, you wouldn't be here right now." he sounded a little guilty and you couldn't help the warmth that started spreading in your stomach.

You started to chuckle.

"Weasley. It's alright." you felt a sudden bravery envelop you as you said the next words nonchalantly. "You owe me another secret and we are even."

You waited for his reaction.

He didn't disappoint. He lifted his head, brown eyes locking into your own. Now you weren't sure if it was a wise idea to make him remember your deal back in the potion storage room.

"And here I thought I could bribe you with chocolate that I nicked from the kitchen...you are not a woman easily pleased." he didn't seem that sad about this fact.

"Where would be the fun in that?"

"Right."

Silence fell upon the two of you. Eyes still interlocked, you weren't sure if minutes or hours passed by. The Hospital Wing's darkness faded, and the freckles splattered across his face became more contrasted than before. He tilted his head to the side, his gaze burned your skin.

Suddenly becoming aware of the weirdness of the situation you cleared your throat and looked away.

"Since the tonic made me hungry like a wolf, I'll accept that nicked chocolate." you said, trying to break the silence.

Fred smiled and threw you the bar he fumbled around with before. Your catch was nothing sort of graceful and you felt embarrassment tint your cheeks.

Looking down at the bar in your hand you felt your eyes grow big.

"How did you know this is my favourite?" you asked astonishment, creeping into your voice.

"Lucky guess." he shrugged. You didn't need to know that every time the Grand Hall's tables were filled with this, he couldn't look away from the joy radiating on your face. Just like now.

"Your taste is impeccable, I gotta say."

Oh yes, his taste was indeed impeccable, but not just in chocolate.

#harry potter #angst #enemies to friends to lovers #enemies to lovers #fred weasley #fred weasley x reader #fred weasley x you #george weasley #slytherin #fred weasley fanfiction #fred weasley x y/n

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unwishablestars · 3 years

Text

amongst the waiting stars

Pairing: Levi Ackerman x f!reader

Genre: Fluff

Word Count: 3.8k

Tags: Mutual Pining, SFW, Drunk Confessions, i tried my best

TWs: Mentions of alcohol intake

Summary: When Levi’s visits get more and more frequent how long until he’d have to admit he didn’t come for the coffee

A/N: this is the first fic I actually finished/properly wrote and I actually dont hate it, hopefully y’all don’t too :)

Wiping off the spilled coffee, restocking the pastries and cakes, it was a calm day for you and your co-workers. You felt a cool autumn breeze enter the room as you hear the door open and were greeted with a rather short man with a bored expression.

"Hello! Welcome to xxx, how may I help you?"

Greeting back with a simple hello, he proceeds to scan the pastries inside the case before he walks up to the counter to order tea and brownies.

With that slight intimidating atmosphere you found around him you didn't expect him to have such a sweet and simple order, emphasis on sweet, he didn't seem the type to order something as sweet as a brownie. Though, that being said, he did order a tea that was rather bitter.

"Can I have your name?" Holding the cup with a pen in hand.

"Levi"

"Alright thank you, Levi. Would you like your brownie reheated?" Asking with a soft and friendly smile "Yes, please."

After asking him to sit down you start to prepare his tea and brownie, approaching him with a black tray in your hand and his food on top of it.

"Please enjoy, Levi!" Setting the tray down and flashing him a little smile before leaving him be.

And that was it, you thought this was as close as you strangers could get.

--------------------

A week to 4 days to 3, he started coming by regularly. Nothing special really, he wasn't the only regular, but you sure as hell didn't expect to be able to talk to him as if you've been friends for ages.

You've memorized the way he likes his tea, you know he has a sweet tooth that he wouldn't admit he has and you know that type of coffee he likes when he needs to get through a lecture.

Every 3 days became 2 then daily, he was back again. You didn't know why but it seemed to excite you to see a familiar face, his familiar face, what didn't make sense was why him? Why was he so special?

Was it the way he openly admired your focused and quick work attitude, the way he would pleasantly chat to you about his life outside this café or those sweet little banters you two have when he enters and leaves the store.

For a man that didn't smile much, he sure was a treasure to have around.

Often enough for you to notice though, he always seemed to sit alone. Asking about it, he's never really responded with anything other than a:

"I'm waiting for someone."

You've never seen this someone. A friend perhaps? A date? Whoever it may be, they seem pretty rude to never show up even once.

Leaning on your arms over the counter to ask him "Waiting again?" Levi started sitting closer and closer to the counter just to make your conversations easier.

A slight pause was present before his answer "Yeah." "Is it the same someone as last time?" Thinking for a moment, "No, it's a different friend."

"Not that is any of my business, but it seems pretty rude for your friends to just never show up like this. You could wait for an hour or so and still not be pissed, gotta say that's pretty admirable."

"It's not a big deal. I mean, I'm stuck here waiting with you aren't I? It's not so bad."

He's right, I guess it wouldn't be so bad if you waited with him too.

"How smooth, Prince Charming." Despite your snarky remark you can't deny, it was nice hear that you made his wait bearable for him.

To the untrained eye, someone could see him as a stoic and quiet man, maybe even intimidating. But with trust and patience, he was sweet and compassionate, it could make your heart melt.

Taking as sip from his tea, presumably ignoring your little banter, you could've sworn you saw the softest smile accompanied with a little blush.

I wouldn't mind waiting with you.

--------------------

Nearing the end of the year, a cool breeze can now be present everywhere. Malls, stores and homes turning on their heaters to help with the growing cold.

Leaving his building wearing a stylish grey coat, already on his way to his personal sanctuary, his thoughts were interrupted with a loud and high:

"LEEEEVIIII"

Turning around he was met with a very much energetic Hange Zoe, stopping in his tracks to see what they have to say. "On your way already? Excited to see your sweetheart?" They said, smirking with a deeper intent than to tease.

Levi's friends were more attentive than he had thought, it didn't take a while for them to realize that he'd been leaving the campus in a slight rush. It also didn't take them long to start guessing what else he could possibly have better to do other than sit in the library or go home immediately.

"She's not my sweetheart." He absolutely wishes though, liar. With Hange and his friends bombarding him with questions like "What's she like?" "Is she pretty?" "Are you going to make the 1st move?" It left butterflies in his stomach. The thought of a confession made his stomach twirl, even if it didn't show on his face.

He often thinks about when that perfect opportunity would arise or even if something like that exists, he'd love to win your heart over and have you in his arms. The thought of you spending your days together, official, made his heart swell, yours too. But how could he possibly ask you out? Who the hell was he to you?

"Right, of course she's not.." Hange responding quickly, stretching out the 'right' to emphasis her suspicion. "Then in that case, you should invite your 'friend' to our little gathering before we leave!" They said with a smug yet genuinely joyful expression on their face, nudging his arm to the suggestion.

"Why would I want to do that?" Levi said plainly. His friends had decided to eat out and drink together at a spot not too far from the campus.

This way they could somewhat spend their holidays together before they actually have to leave for the holidays to see their families. Including Levi, who had planned to spend it with his mother (and uncle).

"Aww c'mon, don't be like that! One of you have got to make a move sooner or later. Plus, wouldn't it be sweet for her to know that you'd been thinking about her?" They argue, thinking about it, he decides to comply.

Already walking off "Fine. Just don't follow me." "Aw but I wanna see her!" "Too bad." They follow him anyway "I'll just wait outside then! Then I'll leave once I know you've asked her!"

Clicking his tongue in agreement, they both head their way to the little café he was ever so familiar with.

-------------------

It was a busier day than usual. Though, it's to be expected due to the cold weather. It just makes people want to sit down and drink their coffee or hot cocoa, warming up their systems.

As you give the last customer in line their coffee, you hear the door open. Looking up to welcome them in, seeing who it was, a brighter smile was presented, almost as if it was an instinct.

Walking up to the counter Levi was understandably nervous, he even considered bailing on the idea now that he's here. But seeing your bright excited smile as he entered the door kept him in motion.

"Levi! Having a nice evening?" A tug at the corner of his lips made your heart pound, "Yeah." Cutting his answer short, his mind too busy to think on how he should pop the question.

"What is today?" "My usual coffee, take out, please." Nodding and grabbing a cup, you start making his usual. Looking back at Hange, they gesture him to stop stalling. You catch him looking out the door to see a tall individual with glasses.

"Is that the friend you've been waiting for all these days?" Your smile lightly calming down "O-oh no.. they're actually.." stopping himself in his tracks, air getting caught in his throat.

"I actually wanted to ask you something." "Oh? What is it?" Your attention shifting to him. "My friend.. And I wanted to ask you- if you'd like to join us for a gathering we're having. W-we'll be eating out together before we leave for the holidays." Not knowing where his eyes should look, he didn't look up until he finished his question.

Seeing your face, visibly shocked but not displeased, a bit flushed. Your eyes soften at that thought, he wanted you to come with? To spend time with you? You couldn't hold back your soft and sweet smile at his offer, what would be the point? Hiding your joy would be pointless.

Taking a look at your face, your initial reaction to the soft look you gave him. He was growing confident, maybe this wouldn't end up blowing up in his face and ruining his relationship with you.

Until your facial expression showed a bit of annoyance, a customer had fallen in line behind Levi with her kid. While the kid seemed rather patient, taking a look at the cakes in the display the mother look impatient and annoyed. "Uh- I'm sorry, Levi. Could you stand over there for a moment" gesturing to the end of the counter "I'll get your coffee ready in a minute."

With that, worry immediately washed over him. Did he say something wrong? Was he too straightforward? Did he mess up? He does as you ask and step aside, too occupied with his thoughts to realize that small flash of annoyance was in no way meant for him.

After dealing with the lady and her daughter, you walk over to Levi, his freshly made cup of coffee. "Sorry about that.. here, your coffee." Seeing his worried expression you give him a reassuring smile, your hand lingering on his as you hand him his coffee.

"Thank you so much for the invitation, Levi. That's very sweet of you." Your face showed a light flush. "It's a really busy day so- don't throw away the cardboard cup sleeve, I don't want to stop this here.." still a small bit stuck in his thoughts, he replies, "A-alright.. Thanks." Giving him another reassuring smile he heads his way to the door meeting up with the friend still outside.

"Looked like it went well!" Hange said joyfully as Levi left the café. "I don't know.. maybe it wasn't the best day to ask her, she seemed occupied." He doubtfully thought, "Huh? She seemed pleased! What are you talking about? Plus, she wrote something on your cup didn't she?" They noted in a curious tone, pointing at his cup.

Catching his attention, he takes a look at his cup and they were right, there was something written on the cup sleeve:

"I'd love to ♡ text me the details!"

was written in black marker followed by your number.

A visible yet faint blush was spread across Levi's face. He hadn't mess up, you don't hate him, you wanted to spend time with him. "Aha! See! Isn't this great?" Hange said enthusiastically, interrupting Levi's train of thought.

"..Yeah"

I'd love to♡

Yeah, this is great.

--------------------

Standing outside by the entrance of your building you stood there waiting for Levi. Having talked about it beforehand you both had decided he would just pick you up and walk with you to a small KBBQ place, just a few minutes away from the campus.

Levi wasn't the biggest fan of smelling smoke as he ate but compared to the rest of the 'cook-it-yourself' places around, this place had better ventilation, a cleaner surrounding and a decent price.

[6:03pm] Levi: Just stay by the entrance inside your building. I'm almost there.

Y/n: Alright! :)

[6:04pm] Levi: Be safe.

He's so sweet.

The weather was nice this evening. It was calm, and the wind wasn't unbearably cold, it was nice. Seeing a familiar figure across the street turning the corner, you face showed excitement as Levi lightly waved seeing you by the door.

Exiting your building you meet with Levi outside the doors, greeting him with a smile "Lead the way!" softly smiling back at you he starts to walk, making sure you're close to him. "It's not far, stay close.. okay?"

Matching his pace to stay close to him, you walk together in tranquility, engaging in peaceful conversations, asking about how they'll spend their break. It all felt natural, makes you wish that KBBQ place wasn't just 20 minutes away.

--------------------

Nearing the restaurant you see the silhouette of a tall, blonde man standing by the entrance. As both of you walk up to him, he greets you with a friendly smile and wave.

"Hello, you must be Y/n, right? I'm Erwin, It's nice to finally meet you." He greets to which to you reply "It's nice to meet you too!" he must be one of Levi's friends who would join us- stopping your thoughts you think back to what he said:

"..nice to finally meet you."

Finally? Has Levi been talking about you? You felt a light blush at the thought, thinking about me? It was nice to think that he'd be thinking about you, after all, you'd been thinking of him too.

"Follow me, we already have a table." Walking inside gesturing for both of you to join, Erwin leads you to a reserved table. Seated at the table were 4 people, one of which you've seen outside the café, the day Levi invited you to eat out with his friends.

As you approach the table you were quickly greeted with hello's and nice to meet you's. Sitting down next to next to the familiar face, they introduced themselves.

"It's nice to see you again! I'm Hange!" "Oh yeah, you were standing outside the café that day, why didn't you come in?" you asked out of curiosity, "Oh I promised Levi I'd wait for him outside while he asked you out!" They gladly explained, lowering their volume to just about a whisper to continue "Y'know.. I was the one who suggested to invite you, Levi can be quite a shy one." They smirked which followed a chuckle.

Looking over at Levi to see some sort of confirmation. All you saw cute pink blush that ran across his face, him looking forward to either avoid eye contact or pretend like he didn't hear, either way, it was adorable.

"Anyway, it's nice to meet you! I'm Nanaba, this is Miche and that's Moblit." Nanaba had introduced going down the line.

"It's nice to meet you all." you simply said, "though.. I can't help but notice, it doesn't seem like you guys extended the invitation to anyone else. Why extend it to me?" as much as you enjoyed sitting here with Levi and his friends you couldn't help but wonder why, couldn't help but want to know it straight, said to your face.

"Because we want to get to know you." Levi admittedly explains, though he feels he wants to get to know you more than anyone else here. His friends nodding in agreement, some smirking at both yours and Levi's oblivious interactions.

Clinking your glasses filled with alcohol the night went on filled with laughter and nonsense. You kept your alcohol intake low knowing you'd obviously still need to go home and you'd rather go home walking than slumping on some poor person's shoulder.

As minutes to hours pass by, sharing stories that brought out laughter which rang around the room. Soon enough it was nearing midnight and some of you were a bit tipsy, some more than others, though you kept yourself your little promise of not going home a blackout drunk.

You weren't drunk but you were tipsy enough to be not be embarrassed if you were to spill some truth about your feelings. After the bill was paid, stuff gathered, and as they walk their way to the door Hange proposes an idea to Levi.

"Y'knowww.. Y/n would really appreciate it if you walked her home.. can't let anything happen to her ya'know.." Clicking his tongue at the smell of alcohol in their breath "What? Did you think I was just gonna let her walk home alone? It's almost 11."

Miche budges in abruptly "Is that why you barely drank?" clearly to tease the man. Overhearing the conversation without really thinking you cling onto his arm "I'm not that tipsy.. but I'd love the company.." a light pink was present across your cheeks, you couldn't tell if it was the alcohol or the blatant confession.

"Even if you were completely sober, I'd still walk you home." He'd love to.

--------------------

There were lots of stars out, nice view. The cool breeze, the bright moon, it was all so beautiful. "When are you gonna leave..?" Catching his attention, "Hm?" "to visit your mom?" you weren't exactly sure why you wanted to know, he did say he was coming back, maybe you just didn't want the night to end yet.

"Tomorrow. I'll be leaving in the morning, why?" he asked back, "Nothing.. just curious." Looking up you see the moon in that navy blue sky, it gave you an idea. Walking into your building you were still gripping his arm, not as tight as when you were out on the street but you didn't exactly plan on letting go just yet.

"Do you mind staying for a bit?" Embarrassed to ask but you did anyway. Taken aback "What? Why? Are you not feeling well?" he asks with a flustered and concerned tone. "No it's not.. you don't have to- I just.." you could feel the alcohol help you speak the truth "..wanna spend more time with you."

It felt like his brain stopped for a moment, did she just..?, but in reality it was racing with thoughts to the point where he didn't even notice. Scared of his silence you ditch the idea just as quick as you proposed it, practically interrupting yourself. "Sorry- sorry, I didn't mean to be- I didn't mean it like that-" apologies and explanations start to leave your mouth all at the same time.

"No, it's alright. I-I know what you meant.. I don't mind." holding back his stutters fairly well the blush spreading towards his ears were as evident as ever. "What? Really?" thank god he didn't take it the wrong way, "Tch," avoiding eye contact and walking toward the elevators "you want my company or not?" "Very much.."

On your way up to your room there was a sense of familiarity and comfort, even though the signs of success were there, you weren't exactly sure what you were so nervous about. Maybe you were sobering up quicker than you thought, it's not all bad though.. You didn't exactly want him to just deal with you drunk, you didn't want him to see you that way.

--------------------

Taking out your keys, opening the door and letting both of you in, you turn on the light and offer him a drink as you open your fridge "Sit down, do you want anything to drink?" "How the hell would I know what's in your fridge?" He says dryly

"Heh- that's fair, hot cocoa then?" Giving a simple nod at your offer you take out two mugs and start to warm up some milk. "Sorry it's just hot cocoa mix and milk." You apologize for no apparent reason other than to avoid the awkward silence.

"That's fine, how do you think I make my hot cocoa?" he asks sarcastically, "with fresh cocoa beans fresh from the tree" you retort jokingly, laughing a little. Surprisingly, he giggles along, making your heart flutter.

Looking at the clock as you pour the milk into the powder, 11:27pm, you interrupt the silence once again with an apology "Sorry.. I know you have you leave in the morning.." you remind yourself as you add a few marshmallows to your cups, walking up to him to give him his drink, "Why do you keep apologizing? I meant it when I said I wanted to be here." He reminds you as he takes the cup out of your hands, unable to hold back a smile the tension on your shoulders loosen, relaxing at his remark.

"If it doesn't bother you.." grabbing the blankets off the couch and opening the window "the nights beautiful.. and the view is better on the roof.." seeing the confusion on his face, you explain in a simple manner "don't worry, it'll be quick and the roof's actually pretty clean. Stargazing on the roof is actually pretty calming."

Trusting your rather odd offer you set your mugs on the counter next to the window to easily step out onto the fire escape. Once both of you had exited you grab both your mugs through the window and head up the steps leading to the roof

"Y'know I didn't expect having to climb out a window today." "Honestly I didn't expect to be stargazing with you, but it's not so bad is it?" "No, no it's not."

--------------------

Reaching the roof you set 1 of the blankets down to avoid sitting directly on the roof.

Sitting down you pat the spot next to you asking him to sit down, doing as you request, he settles beside you holding onto his hot cocoa for warmth "The second blanket is for us, no secret that it's gonna get chilly." You explained, casually wrapping it around both of you, what a bold move.

You smile at him, showing fulfillment and joy. The smiled you both see around each other always show honesty, such a simple gesture can convey so much. Now under the moonlight, snuggled together close, his heart couldn't handle how lovely it felt. You could've sworn you saw his eye water a little, that or the light of the moon glistened brighter than usual.

Looking up at the stars, admiring their light and formations, sipping on your warm drink, the air in your lungs start to lock up. Exhaling a breath you didn't know you were keeping in, the comfortable silence was broken with emotions put into words.

"Other than a ball of fire a huge distance away, do you think they can be anything else?"

"I don't know." he answered with simplicity and honesty.

"You ever wonder how long the stars have been here?"

"Not really, I don't look up at the sky that often. But I'm sure they've been here for a while."

Say it.

"I'd happily wait a billion years to see you."

Taken by surprise, he swings his head to take a look at you.

"..whether it be coming to the café, picking me up, coming home from a trip or seeing you in another life. I'll be here, waiting for you to come home. You wouldn't ever have to second guess it, because I'll be here, loving every second of it."

Looking up at him, to pour your heart out. "Because every second of it, I'll be loving you."

Letting out a shaky breath, holding you closer, softly yet firmly holding onto your hand, letting out the simple truth.

"That and so much more is the reason why I can say: I love you too."

#levi ackerman #levi x y/n #levi ackerman x reader #aot x reader #aot #aot fanfiction #anime #levi aot #levi x reader #levi x you #attack on titan #first fanfic #sfw post #aot modern au

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