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#is there even anything to forgive? is there even forgiveness?
joelsgreys · 1 day
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Post Outbreak! Joel Miller x Pregnant! Female Reader
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snapshots masterlist
summary: When you finally start to show, Joel has a tough time with it as the reality sinks in—he’s going to be a father again.
warnings/tags: 18+ ONLY, MINORS DNI. JACKSON ERA. (TW) PREGNANCY. established relationship. no mention of reader’s age, however in other works for this universe, it is implied she is younger than Joel, her specific age will never be stated so do with that what you will. brief descriptions of a pregnant woman’s changing body, brief mention of morning sickness, mention of breastfeeding (it only comes up in a conversation very briefly) these subjects can possibly be triggering, especially mentions of a changing body, so while i try to handle everything with the utmost care, i still ask that you proceed with caution. domesticity, reader enjoys taking care of her family, ellie is a little shit, grumpy joel, he’s sort of a dick at first? but only because he’s working through some feelings so let’s forgive him, okay?
word count: 3.5k
a/n: this is part of the snapshots universe, but it could absolutely be read as a standalone too. minimal editing, this has been sitting in my drafts and i did a quick edit during my lunch hour, so please excuse any mistakes.
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“Shit.”
You almost can’t believe your own two eyes. Staring at your reflection in the large, oval shaped mirror hanging over the porcelain bathroom sink, your gaze widens in complete surprise. “Jesus Christ,” you mutter, turning to the side. It takes your brain about a good minute or two to process, really process, the way that your belly strains against the thin, white cotton of your camisole. It had seemingly swollen overnight—because it hadn’t been this prominent the day before, had it?
Over the last few months, there’d been changes.
Some subtle and some not so subtle.
“Ellie! Stop fucking staring at them,” you’d scolded the teenager late one evening during yours and hers weekly game night. For as hard as you tried focusing on what move you should make next, it was hard to concentrate on the chessboard in front of you when you could feel the way her eyes were fixed on your breasts. “I mean it! Quit staring at my boobs, you little shit.”
She held up her hands, her mouth full of popcorn.
“Hey, in my defense, they’re just fucking there, man. If anything, they’re fucking staring at me, okay?”
During your chess rematch the following week, you had accidentally knocked one of your pawn pieces off of the table. When you’d stood up and bent over to pick it up, she had made the observation that your butt seemed to have gotten a little bigger too.
“Bet Joel’s liking these changes,” Ellie had smirked. “It sure as hell explains why the headboard’s been banging against the wall more than usual lately.”
You threw the pawn at her, smiling in satisfaction when it bounced off her forehead and landed into her glass of lemonade.
One part of your body, however, hadn’t changed.
Not until now.
“Hon, trust me, you have nothing to be worried about,” Maria had assured you with confidence when you had brought up your concerns about your stomach. “Every woman, and every pregnancy, is different. I didn’t start showing until I was around six months, remember?”
“I guess you’re right.” You’d been around four months, then. “Doesn’t help that I haven’t felt the baby move.”
“You will,” Maria had promised. “Just be patient”
Biting your lip, you place a hand on your belly.
It’s always been one of the softer parts of you, but now, it’s firmed into a perfect, round bump.
“Maybe soon I’ll feel you move,” you murmur, giving it a gentle pat. You tug the lace hem of your camisole down as far as it can go and then pull at the elastic waistband of your blue, terry cloth shorts.
Shutting off the lights in the bathroom, you slip out into the bedroom where you find that Joel’s still tangled up in the sheets, fast asleep. He had been assigned to the afternoon patrol route today—normally an early riser, if he was still snoozing, it meant that he really needed the rest. Deciding it was best to let him keep sleeping for a little while longer, you quietly tiptoe out of your shared bedroom and head downstairs into the kitchen.
After making yourself a glass of fresh squeezed orange juice, and one for the kid as well, you prepare the coffee maker for Joel. You spoon dark roast grounds into the filter and set the timer for the coffee to start brewing in thirty minutes.
He should be up by then, you think, pulling a basket of eggs out of the refrigerator.
You’re starting to get used to this. Domesticity.
Despite your protests, Maria had made the decision to pull you off patrol that same afternoon you had shared the news of your pregnancy. “I’m putting you on leave,” she’d told you. “Effective immediately. I don’t want to see you outside of these walls. Got it?”
“That’s not fair, Maria. You were out on patrol until—”
One stern glare from her had shut you right up.
“Fine.”
Sure, you missed it and looked forward to the day when you’d be able to get back into the saddle with your rifle in hand, but this way of life had grown on you. Certainly a lot more than you thought it would.
You enjoyed taking care of the house. Packing Ellie her lunch for school and checking her homework. Having a nice a meal on the table for the three of you to enjoy in the comfort of your own home instead of having to go down to the crowded mess hall for supper because you and Joel were both always much, much too tired after a long day out on patrol to bother with cooking.
With the baby due to arrive in the winter, looking after your little family had become your purpose, and you did not mind it one bit.
As strips of bacon sizzle in one pan on the gas powered stove, you crack a couple of eggs into another, knowing the kid is already on her way downstairs. You can hear the sound of her old, tattered low top sneakers that you have been trying to throw away for almost a year now squeaking on the kitchen tiles just as you finish plating her breakfast.
“Morning!” Ellie pipes, the loud plop of her backpack into a chair prompting you to turn around. “What’s for brea—whoa! Holy shit!” Her brown eyes widen in shock when she sees you and her jaw drops. “Dude.”
“Ellie,” you say her name warningly as you walk over to the table. “Don’t.”
“You’re bigger!”
With a playful glare, you set her plate down, along with her glass of orange juice. “Thanks a lot, you little jerk.” You feign offense. “You’re making your own eggs from now on.”
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Ellie’s cheeks flush a shade of red and she squirms, sputtering apologetically, “I swear, I don’t mean it like that at all. It’s just, your stomach, it didn’t—you didn’t look like this last night, you know?”
She’s fucking lucky that your raging hormones decided to take the morning off duty.
“You look different. I mean, you look great—”
“Ellie?”
“Yeah?”
“Just shut up and eat.”
“Deal.”
She shoots you a sheepish grin and sits down, scarfing down her food in her usual manner. 
“You get your fractions homework done?”
“Yeah.” Ellie huffs, rolling her eyes. “Took me forever. I was up until fucking midnight.”
Amused, you offer, “Want me to check your work?”
“Sure.”
As Ellie inhales the rest of her breakfast, you pull out a green, single subject notebook from her backpack and look over her homework for miscalculations.
“So, uh, how are you feeling?” she asks after a minute.
“I’m feeling alright. I think the morning sickness finally stopped, so can’t complain.” Shrugging, you close the notebook and stick it into her backpack. “You did good, kid. Only got two problems wrong.”
“Man, I really wish we knew whether it’s a boy or girl,” Ellie mumbles through a mouthful of scrambled eggs. “What do you want to have, anyway?”
“It doesn’t matter to me, Ellie,” you answer, honestly. Clocking the skepticism on her face, you laugh and say, “It’s true. As long as the baby’s healthy, that’s all I care about.” And you mean it. As an expectant mother in the post outbreak world where medicine is scarce, supplies are limited, and the closest thing you have to a hospital is the town’s old clinic, the only thing you can hope for is the smooth, safe delivery of a healthy child.
Before she can say anything, you both catch the sound of Joel’s heavy boots as he descends the staircase.
She quirks an eyebrow. “Uh, has Joel seen you yet?”
Grimacing, you shake your head. “No.”
“Well, I don’t wanna be here for all that awkward,” Ellie says, chugging the rest of her orange juice. She stands up and snatches up her backpack, along with her lunch bag, which you’d packed for her earlier that morning. Just as she’s about to whirl around on the heel of her sneaker and make a run for the front door, she pauses, watching as you make your way back over to the stove to light another flame. “Unless you want me to be?”
“I’ll be fine, Ellie,” you assure her. “Go on, get to school. Maybe you’ll be on time to class for once.”
“If you say so.” She wishes you luck and then bolts out of the kitchen, throwing a quick goodbye at Joel on the way out. “See ya later, old man!”
Nervously, you turn around and start cracking another two eggs into the pan. There’s no telling how he’s going to react.
Joel’s been fairly supportive since you’d found out you were pregnant, considering how unplanned it was. But you know him like the back of your own hand, and you know, despite the numerous times he’s denied it, that it has been weighing heavily on him. Each time you’d try to sit down to talk to him about it, he would brush you off and insist he was fine. But he wasn’t fine.
And you wish he would spit it out and tell you why.
In your periphery, you notice the stained glass butterfly he had hung in front of the window above the sink, the ornament catching and refracting the sunlight. Flecks of color dance across the walls in captivating patterns, brightening the space. You think of the sweet little girl he’d hung it for, the little girl he rarely talks about, that he keeps tucked away safely in his memory.
You bite back a small sigh.
By now, you’ve learned not to push him. Especially not about what he was feeling. He would tell you when he was ready.
“Who the hell lit a fire under her ass this mornin’?” Joel asks gruffly as he walks into the kitchen. “She ain’t ever this fuckin’ eager to go to school.”
“Not sure,” you reply in the most nonchalant tone you can muster as you use a spatula to scramble the eggs. Transferring them onto a plate, you add three strips of bacon, and then pour his coffee. “I have your breakfast ready, Joel. Have a seat.”
You hear a chair scrape against the tile.
“I keep tellin’ you I can make my own breakfast, darlin’.”
“And I keep telling you I don’t mind making it for you,” you quip, and you hear him grumble something under his breath.
Inhaling a deep, calming breath through your nose, you take the plate of eggs and bacon in one hand, and his cup of coffee in the other. Your fingers grasp the handle of his ceramic, owl mug in a near death grip. You exhale slowly, and then turn around to face him.
He sees your swollen middle and stiffens in his chair. 
The tension is instantaneous. Palpable.
Uncomfortable.
Awkwardly, you shift from one foot to the other.
“Your belly,” Joel murmurs, a visible tick in his jaw as his gaze drags over your midsection. “S’bigger.”
“Yeah. It is. Guess I’m going to have to start trading for maternity clothes soon,” you remark, shuffling over to the table. Setting down the plate and mug of coffee in front of him, you take a seat across the table. Your eyes try desperately to meet his, but they refuse. There’s no way for you to decipher what he’s thinking. You let out a small, nervous laugh. “Can you please say something?” 
He lightly clears his throat. “I’ll take you to Main Street on Saturday,” he tells you, picking up his mug. “I’ve got the day off from patrol. I’ll, uh, pick through some of my own things and see what I don’t need so we can make a trade for some clothes.” He pauses, then offers quietly, “In the meantime, you can wear my shirts. They might be more comfortable for you.”
You flash him a grateful smile. “Thank you, Joel.”
Sipping his coffee, he continues to avoid your gaze.
“Mhm,” is all he says.
Your smile falters.
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It’s the middle of August.
The afternoon heat is sweltering. Unforgiving.
“Jesus, it’s a fuckin’ scorcher,” Tommy sighs, glancing over towards the lake where his mare, Maxine, is taking a drink beside his brother’s stallion, Phoenix. His raven curls are damp with sweat, plastered to his forehead. “Hotter than the devil’s fuckin’ balls out here, ain’t it?”
He’s met with silence.
Looking over his shoulder, he sees Joel leaning against a tree, his rifle in hand as he stares at the Grand Tetons in the distance almost like he’s in a trance. “Joel?”
Blinking furiously, Joel shakes his head. “Sorry, you say somethin’ to me just now?” He asks in a daze, pushing away from the lodgepole pine. “We headin’ out?”
“You’ve been actin’ real strange all afternoon,” Tommy observes, walking towards him with his own gun slung over his shoulder. “Either the heat is startin’ to get to you, or you’ve got somethin’ on your mind, big brother.”
Joel hesitates. His dark eyes flit to the other side of the lake where the other members of their afternoon patrol group are refilling their canteens with water.
“S’alright,” his younger brother says. “Don’t worry ‘bout them. Can’t hear us.”
Joel’s chest heaves with a heavy sigh. “She popped.”
“Huh?”
“Her belly finally popped. She’s showin’ now.”
Amused, Tommy lightly shakes his head. “Y’shouldn’t be so surprised, Joel. Was ‘bout time,” he remarks with a shrug. “What is she—like six months along now?”
“She’ll be six months in a couple weeks.” Joel wipes the perspiration off his brow with the back of his hand and sighs once more. “Look, I ain’t stupid, Tommy. I knew it was bound to happen sooner or later, but it still caught me by surprise. When I saw her, it became real for me. She’s got my kid in there. I’m gonna be a dad again.”
“You’re scared.” It’s not a question, it’s a statement.
“Shitless,” Joel confesses, feeling his chest tighten. 
“What are you afraid of?”
Joel almost laughs.
He doesn’t know where to start.
He’s afraid of everything.
“All of it, Tommy. I’m afraid for her, havin’ to give birth with no medicine,” he tells him, his voice breaking. “I’m afraid I won’t remember what to do with a newborn or that I won’t know how to help her durin’ those first few months—”
“This ain’t your first rodeo,” Tommy reminds him. “You did it once, and you did just fine, Joel.”
“That was over three fuckin’ decades ago. And it was a different world. If Sarah—” He stops, taking a second to catch his breath. The image of his daughter’s little face flashing in his mind feels like a violent punch to the gut. Even after all this time, it still knocks all of the wind out of his lungs. “When her mom had trouble breastfeedin’ her, I could head to the grocery store and buy her baby formula. If she got a real bad fever, I could load her up in the truck and drive her to the emergency room.” He glances down at his broken watch. “Besides, I was a lot younger, then. And I wasn’t half fuckin’ deaf like I am now. When Sarah would wake up cryin’ in the middle of the night because she needed a diaper change, I’d hear her. What if I can’t hear my own kid cryin’?”
“Joel—”
“I’m in my fifties. What if I can’t keep up because I’m too fuckin’ old?”
Tommy reaches out, clapping a hand onto his shoulder.
“Brother, I need you to take a fuckin’ breath,” he says, chuckling softly. “You’re puttin’ the weight of the world of your shoulders right now—you need to put some of it down. Look, we might not have everythin’ we used to before the world ended, but we make do with what we do have. Considerin’ just how many growin’ families we have and how many little ones we’ve got runnin’ around our town, I’d say it’s workin’ out pretty fuckin well.” He gives his shoulder an encouraging squeeze. “And as far as your ability to be a good dad, you’ve still got it, Joel. You know what to do, and so does she. I’ve seen her in action with my little boy, and it seems like she’s already got those maternal instincts, y’know?”
“Yeah, she does,” Joels agrees quietly, thinking of how you had stepped up to help him care for Ellie.
“Trust me, between the two of you, it’ll be alright.”
He peers at him. “You really believe I still got it in me?”
“I do.” Tommy smiles. “You never stopped knowin’ how to be a father, Joel. You’re gonna be just fine.”
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Their patrol shift extends into the evening, turning into a double, and it’s late when he gets home. 
“What the hell are you still doin’ up?” Joel asks when he finds Ellie sitting at the kitchen table, cursing to herself as she flips through the stale, yellowing pages of an old life science text book.
“What does it fucking look like, man?”
“Shouldn’t have waited until the last minute, kiddo—”
Ellie holds up a hand and cuts him off.
“Save the lecture for another time, dude. I’m busy.”
Joel rolls his eyes. “Finish up and get to bed. S’late.”
Without waiting for some smartass response, he turns on the heel of his boot and then heads upstairs to your shared bedroom. He flips on the lights only to find that you’re already in bed, fast asleep, wearing nothing but one of his t-shirts and a pair of panties. He toes off his boots and leaves them by the door, being as quiet as he possibly can as he rummages through his top drawer for some clean boxers to sleep in.
He slips into the bathroom where he takes a quick, hot shower, scrubbing off that day’s sweat, dirt, and grime. After he’s dressed and his sopping wet, salt and pepper curls are haphazardly towel dried, Joel walks back out into the bedroom where he switches off the lights and climbs into bed next to you.
He lays on his side and he’s just about to close his eyes when he feels a light shift beside him. You roll over and curl into him, your belly pressing up against his curve of his spine.
He stiffens, freezing as if someone had just placed the barrel of their pistol against his back, their finger over the trigger.
Christ, get a damn grip, he thinks silently to himself.
Joel thinks about that morning in the kitchen.
He knows his reaction had hurt you. Or rather, his lack of a reaction. His shitty ways of coping aren’t your fault, and his struggle to come to terms with your pregnancy sure as hell isn’t your fault, either. He owed it to you to try harder to be the man you needed.
The man you both needed.
Joel’s train of thought comes to a screeching halt when he feels a soft flutter against his middle of his back, the spot right where your tummy is nestled—did the baby just move?
He lies still, waiting to see if he feels it again, and when he doesn’t, he rolls over to face you, causing you to stir.
“Joel?” you mumble his name, sleepily. “What time—?”
“Shh,” Joel soothes, pulling you into his bare chest. He kisses your temple. “S’okay, baby. Go back to sleep.”
He doesn’t have to tell you twice.
Within seconds, you’re asleep again, snuggled into him and snoring softly.
Lifting a hand, he hesitates, then rests it on your belly.
He waits.
And waits.
And waits.
And waits.
Until the minutes turn into hours.
Until dawn’s light filters in through the lace curtains. 
Until he finally feels that little flutter again.
He feels it against the palm of his hand. Faint, nothing more than a brief whisper against his skin, but there is no mistaking it.
He’d just felt the baby’s movement.
There’s a sudden shift.
Tense muscles that had been painfully wound up since the moment you’d mentioned to him your period was a week late back in the spring loosen slightly—the breath he had been holding since he’d picked up that positive pregnancy test from the bathroom counter finally falls from his lips, fanning over yours.
His fears, his worries, his uncertainties about what lies ahead, they’re all still there, of course, but he finds they are now accompanied by a glimmer of hope, a sliver of optimism that maybe, just maybe, Joel doesn’t have to be as afraid as he is.
Joel’s eyes glaze over your face, warmth radiating in his chest when you breathe a little a sigh of content in your sleep as he gently rubs your stomach through his shirt.
With his hand still splayed over your belly, he closes his eyes and begins to drift off, falling into the most decent sleep he’s had in the last few months.
Maybe his brother’s right.
Maybe he will be just fine.
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divider credit to @saradika 🤍
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ashwhowrites · 3 days
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Eddie Munson x reader,they fight over something stupid, but Eddie ends up screaming at Reader, so she stops talking to him, until Eddie realizes that he needs to apologize to reader, so he ends up making a cute date at the bench in the woods, and Reader accepts his apologies
I hope this is what you wanted and you enjoy it. Thank you for requesting 🫶🏻
Don't yell
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Y/N hated to be yelled at. She grew up with a family that screamed at each other and she hated the nasty stomach ache it caused. She'd break down, sob for hours, and hide in her shell.
Which is what she was doing right now. She sobbed into her pillow as her TV blared. She kept turning up the volume to silence her sobs. Whenever Y/N needed comfort, she'd go to Eddie. But she couldn't do that, because he was the last person she wanted to see. Because he screamed in her face. The argument wasn't that big of a deal, and Y/N didn't even remember what it was about.
All she remembered was Eddie's loud voice ringing through her ears as his hands moved dramatically. Eddie knew she hated being yelled at, yet he still did. His anger got the best of him and now she suffers from it.
"LEAVE ME ALONE!" Chanted in her head over and over. He tried to chase after her but she refused to listen to him. He wanted her gone so she left.
She ignored all his calls. She refused to open her window or doors when he knocked. She ignored him completely.
Even when they went back to school, she marched past him like he was nothing. He felt like an idiot when he chased her all around the school but she refused to turn around.
~~~
They haven't spoken in a week and Eddie was falling apart. He truly didn't know what he was supposed to do. He couldn't get her to talk to him so he screamed he was sorry down the hallways. He technically apologized, but it didn't fix anything.
He needed to convince her to see him and then he had to come up with the best apology he could. He had to make himself worthy of being forgiven.
Since she wouldn't talk, he tried to write instead. He begged her to meet him at his spot in the woods. He slipped the note into her locker and raced to the woods.
He unzipped his backpack and pulled out the decorations. He placed down the candles and grabbed his lighter from his pocket. He flicked the lighter until he felt the warm heat of fire at the top. He lit the candles and placed them on the small wooden table.
He grabbed the box of rose petals and sprinkled it along the grass.
"What are you doing?"
Eddie jumped, causing him to spill the rose petals into one big pile.
"Jesus Christ," Eddie laughed. He gestured to the seat and Y/N followed. She still had a hard face and her arms were crossed.
Eddie coughed nervously and took a seat across from her.
"Thank you for coming," Eddie said.
"What do you want, Eddie?"
"I want to apologize for raising my voice at you. It was wrong, and I know it's something you hate. You didn't deserve to be treated like that. I love you so much and I don't want to lose you. Can you please give me the chance to make this right?"
Y/N sighed but could feel his apology taking the weight off her shoulders. The sick filling in her gut lifted and she felt like she could breathe again.
"Can you promise to never yell at me again?" Y/N asked, she looked into Eddie's hopeful eyes and smiled.
"I promise," he said as he crossed his heart.
"I guess I can forgive you," she teased and rolled her eyes. Eddie beamed as he leaned over the table.
"Make-up kiss?" He pouted, his puppy eyes working their magic.
"Dork," she laughed but cupped his face and landed her lips on his.
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First kiss, what bliss... maybe...
Summary: Neither you nor your partner have had your first kiss yet. What kind of shenanigans would that information bring?
Characters: Cater, Jamil, Vil × GN!Reader (separate)
Warnings: misunderstandings
By opening the document, you agree to Mx Tattly's terms of source confidentiality.
-ˋˏ’✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈
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Facing Cater after what happened felt like the hardest challenge you've ever gone through
Curse Magicam and curse couple tags and couple selfies, curse all of it!
The memory was fresh in your mind, making you cringe at the situation
You just wanted to take a cute selfie with your boyfriend, like any normal person
And you thought it would be funny and cute to kiss him on the cheek mid selfie
But he happened to have the same idea...
And your lips unceremoniously clashed over each other
As if the situation wasn't very embarassing already, Cater's reaction made it worse
He awkwardly laughed while scratching the back of his head, then left the room in a hurry
Horrible feedback for your first kiss, really
Were you that bad at kissing? But you didn't even have time to be bad, it was barely anything but his lips landing on yours
Sevens, even thinking about it made you feel like your face was on fire
You cursed all teen rom coms for lying to your poor teenage heart as you buried yourself under your blankets
But soon enough your phone started buzzing like crazy
One, twice, thrice
Twenty times
You picked it up to check what was going on, when you saw none other than your boyfriend spamming you with apology texts
"i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry" "i'm sorry"
His apologies only made you more confused
"wait why"
You could tell he was trying to pick between keysmashing his way to forgiveness and trying to find a coherent response as the loading chat bubble appeared and disappeared on your screen for a few minutes
In the end all he sent back was one text
"nvm i'm coming back to ur dorm stay there"
You undug yourself out of your fluffy pity party and, before you could process properly the situation you were in, Cater knocked at your door
You combed your fingers through your hair before taking a deep breath and opening the door
Just to see a Cater just as frazzled as you were
"I'm so sorry I didn't know what to do I wanted to be cute-"
"I was so stupid, I don't know what came over me, I panicked and-"
You talked over each other, then stopped and sunk into a bit of an awkward silence
Not even your conflict solving skills were on your side today
"Uhm, Let's just... I mean, can I come in?"
"I will let you in... before Riddle hears you used 'can' instead of 'may'."
Cater's eyes widened before he snorted, and a small smile blosommed on his lips
"Alright, don't mind me~"
His sing songy delivery came out slightly tense as he hesitated before stepping into your room and making a bee line to your bed
Another awkward, albeit shorter, silence took over the room before you sighed
"Cater, I'm sorry. I wanted to be cute and kiss you on the cheek, I'm sorry if I overstepped something or-"
"Oh, no no no! That's not it at all!"
Cater's cheeks grew redder than you've ever seen them
"You have nothing to apologise for! It's just..."
His eyes went from your face to the floor, then to the lamp on your nightstand
"It took my by surprise, and I was not prepared at all, and I reacted very poorly... It was so much different than what I thought our first kiss to be."
He reached out to his hair and started playing with a strand, something you noticed he did when he needed something to do with his hands
You took a seat next to him on the bed and sighed
"To be honest... I have no idea how I wanted our... first kiss... to be like... Since that was my first and all."
Cater's eyes widened and he snorted
"Yours too?"
Hearing his words, you turned to face him, and saw an expression hard to read
"Wait, what? Really?"
Cater nodded
You snorted, then burst into laugher
He had no idea why, but Cater also joined in with his own confused giggles
"So both our first kisses kinda sucked. Man...!"
Cater lied on your bed, obviously more relaxed than before
"...Well, at least I know I'm not the only victim of the lies about the romcom first kiss."
"You know what they say about misery loving company!"
You lied next to Cater, thinking about how ridiculous everything was
And you were glad to see Cater back to his more relaxed self
"So... No hard feelings, then?"
His question made you giggle
"None. Only if you promise me a proper redo, though."
Cater turned on his side, prompting his head on his arm
"Totally! Not right now, though. My heart had enough of a workout today."
"Same..."
You spent the rest of the day watching cute videos on his Magicam feed
The atmosphere turned back to normal once again, and you almost forgot about the incident
Until a few weeks later, when Cater was finally ready for the proper redo
『••✎••』
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You were leaving Sam's and checking items off of a list, making mental notes to yourself
Ingredients for chakli and shankarpali? Check. Enough paper to make origami jasmines until your hands hurt? Check.
The permission slip from Kalim that allowed you and Jamil to stay out of the dorm for the night? Check. The contracts from Azul binding your friends to the responsibility of keeping Kalim in check while you and Jamil are away? Check
Were your preparations a little extreme? Maybe, but you had a very important goal in mind
Several weeks prior, you were bestowed with a very valuable information: Jamil never had his first kiss
Neither did you, but you wanted to do something about it
After a lot of shifts at the Mostro Lounge, you finally were able to put together the perfect date
A picnic under the stars in the garden of Ramshackle dorm, where you could create the perfect opportunity to give your boyfriend the first kiss he deserves!
You skipped on your way to your dorm from excitement and prepared everything for the special night
But whatever deities ruled over Twisted Wonderland decided that it would be funny to cause an unpredictable downpour on the very night you were planning to be out
All Jamil could do to help your disappointed self was to help you gather your things and resume the "picnic" in your dorm room
Despite him trying to comfort you, you still had a hard time recovering, as the night you were so emotionally invested in was ruined
Jamil sighed as it sunk in that the issue was deeper than he thought, and he made you sit down with him
"This wasn't just a normal date, was it? Talk to me, Reader."
You sighed and grabbed Jamil's hand
"I'm just... really disappointed, I guess. I worked really hard to make this date special! And this stupid rain ruined the night. I'm sorry..."
Jamil raised an eyebrow
"Special? Were you preparing something for a special occasion?"
You hated how perceptive he was sometimes
You looked away, and your reaction to his question was all the confirmation Jamil needed
He still waited for you to tell him, regardless of how embarassed you grew with every second of silence
So eventually you caved after what felt like a whole hour of silence
"...You know how you told me you haven't had your... your first kiss?"
Jamil listened to your explanation with a growing blush on his cheeks
"I wanted to make it memorable! I haven't had my first kiss either so I thought it would be great to make it great for the both of us! But then it started raining, and it made the food all soggy, and I just wasted three weeks of my life for a stupid contract with Azul and my friends to make sure Kalim doesn't accidentally start an international conflict while I'm trying to smooch you!"
Your little rant left Jamil speechless
You were expecting some sort of snort or sarcastic remark, but you heard... nothing
So you turned your face to look at Jamil
And he was deep in thought, eyes not even looking at you
His mouth opened and closed a few times
Jamil's face never settled on an expression for too long, his conflicted feelings coming to the surface
The silence was making your nervous, but it was obvious Jamil was weighting his words very carefully
"Reader, I don't need a special setting for you to show you care about me."
"I know you don't need it, but you deserve it! You work so hard all the time and you never get the praise you deserve, I wanted to spoil you as much as I could and give you an unforgettable memory..."
Jamil was rendered completely speechless
And, when your words finally sunk in, his face started burning like a campfire, and he pulled his hood over his head
"You... You are impossible..."
Your hand was still holding his, and you gave it a squeeze in reassurance
The silence that befell on you was just a bit awkward, but you gave Jamil time to recover emotionally
A few minutes passed when he pulled the hood off and asked you to make a pillow fort with him in your room
"I can't let your efforts go to waste, not after... after everything you've said."
Despite your disappointment, you'd never say no to a night with your boyfriend
So you took the chairs, Jamil took the blankets and pillows, and you set up a pretty nice fort
It wasn't the starry sky you imagined yourself sitting under, but maybe Jamil was right
You didn't need anything fancy to have a special moment
And the way he was clinging to you while you were running your fingers through his hair was even more special to you than anything
You chuckled to yourself at the visage of Jamil Viper, the most tense and closed off teen you know, completely making himself comfortable in your embrace as if your body was made to hold him and cherish him
He raised his head, his attention caught by your chuckle
Maybe it was the way Jamil looked more relaxed than usual or the way that he was simply looking at you, expecting nothing but to satiate a small curiosity
But Jamil looked really beautiful to you in that moment
And kissable...
"This is kind of embarassing... I really wanna kiss you right now..."
Jamil smirked at you
"I thought you needed a meteor shower and a full course meal to get a kiss."
"...Never mind, you ruined it."
You were sure he wouldn't let it die until you actually kissed
A problem you could solve really easily
You started plotting another plan; this one was simpler, and it involved just you making him look at you and leaning in a little closer...
『••✎••』
"Did you have any voice acting roles animated movies and stuff?"
Vil contemplated your question for a few seconds while he applied some skin cleanser on his face
"A few, yes. I prefer when people experience my presence fully when I act, but I don't mind bringing a different type of character to life if I like the project."
You were in Vil's room, using your priviledge of being the partner of a Housewarden to spend the night with your boyfriend without the need of a formal pass
As fair as Vil was, he didn't mind your daring actions as they amused him
To pass the time while Vil prepared himself to go to bed, you decided to play 20 questions
"Do you prefer open ended media or do you like to know what comes out of the fate of the characters?"
Vil was good at asking questions, as they really made you fall deep in thought
"Hmm... I think both are pretty great. It depends on the setting the most. An open ending works well with a thriller movie, but I like a proper ending for a romcom."
Your boyfriend hummed at your response
You watched Vil as he reached for his serum, and you caught a glimpse of a smile on his face
"Smart answer. That's the beauty of media, it allows you to tell different kinds of stories in different ways."
Vil opened the serum bottle and let a few droplets fall on his face
"Have you had your first kiss for a role or in real life?"
"Neither."
"Wait. Really?"
Vil snickered at your reaction as he met your eyes through his mirror
"What, is it really that shocking that I haven't had my first kiss yet?"
He was something else: usually people would be embarassed at the prospect of having to admit they haven't had their first kiss at all
"Kind of? I assumed that... well, I know that people who've been acting for as long as you have been exposed to a lot of things before the proper time."
"I can't deny that. I could say that I had a lot of people making sure I never did anything too... extreme."
Vil grabbed his moisturizer, and you had no idea how to feel about losing count of the products he has used so far
While he applied the product, Vil smiled to himself mischievously
"What about you? Have you had your first kiss?"
Your cheeks warmed up in embarassment
"No..."
Your reply was followed by an awkward laugh, and it drew a chuckle out of Vil
For the first time in a while, Vil got up from his chair and sat on his bed next to you, leaning closer
His closeness to you and your confession made your cheeks grow hot
The floral scent of his freshly applied products and the teasing glint in his eyes made you dizzy
"Oh? Is that so?"
Your confusion suddenly vanished as you realised what Vil was about to do
Were you about to kiss?! Right now?!
Vil leaned in very close to your face while you panicked and tried to figure out what to do
He kept a distance of barely two centimeters for a few seconds
Then he kissed your nose, making you confused
"You've been able to go on this long without your first kiss, you'll be fine waiting a little longer..."
You were shocked as Vil backed away with a smile on his face and cheeks dusted pink
It finally dawned on you: he was only teasing you
He only laughed when you gave him a swat to his thigh, wordlessly accepting your offense as warranted
The audacity of this guy...
"You really though I'd allow our first kiss to be anything less than spectacular? My line of work has been advertising a life changing moment, and I feel it's my duty to... live up to the hype."
Your indignation, as lighthearted as it was, refused to allow your pride to be wounded by such teasing
You raised yourself from your spot and, with a courage fueled only by impulsivity, you put your hand at the back of Vil's neck
You pulled Vil close to your face, action that earned you a gasp from your beloved
Almost all courage left you but you still continued with your plan: you waited a few seconds before pressing your lips to the corner of his mouth
"Your... line of work also has teasers and trailers, right? Consider this one of them."
Vil was more than shocked; to your surprise, he seemed awestruck by your actions
A lovely pink took over his face as a proud smile bloomed on his features
"Maybe I will."
『••✎••』
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adollrable · 1 day
Text
Under the same moon.
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✧ summary: where it's your birthday and your boyfriend is on a mission far from home.
✧ cw: female reader x leon kennedy (re4r), fluff, just him being a cutie pie and the boyfiest boyfie ever (⁠◕⁠ᴗ⁠◕⁠✿
✧ wc: 1387
a/n: I'M SCARED, this is my first time writing something COMPLETELY in english so... if something looks kinda silly forgive me 😞 english is not my first language but feel free to give me feedback!
my birthday was two days ago and i kinda want it to write something so, if someone is reading this on their birthday, happy birthday!!! 🤲🏻
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11:45 PM. You were pacing around your apartment. Brushing your teeth, doing your skin care routine, pulling out the softest cotton sheets you have at your disposal.
You looked at the calendar that sat on the nightstand next to your bed, your eyes drifting towards the next day's date. Your birthday.
You weren't that excited, the printed number that indicated your day of birth wasn't marked with a red marker that circled it. The date Leon would return was.
Originally, your boyfriend's absence wouldn't interfere with your birthday. He would be with you on your special day. But you thought back to the call you had with him a few days ago, with him trying to get a signal to tell you that he couldn't make it on time and that he was really sorry.
You understand. It doesn't bother you, but you wish he was by your side now.
His job was complicated, and he explained that he couldn't tell you much from it. As far as you know, he's in Spain, rescuing someone. You don't know who, but it must be someone important.
11:55 PM. Five minutes to midnight. Five minutes until another return to the sun happens for you.
You laid down on your bed, covered by the sheets that hugged your body. You took the pillow that Leon usually uses and wrapped both arms around it, seeking comfort to avoid missing him so much.
Tomorrow would be just another day. Sure, your friends will congratulate you, you will receive calls from your family at extremely early hours of the morning, and you will repeat "thank you, I appreciate it" like a broken recorder for each call and message.
Gifts don't matter, much less a cake, or a party. The only thing you want is for the love of your life to return soon and you can be together.
Rolling between thoughts, you were able to fall asleep.
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12:00 PM. Finally your birthday.
Your cellphone vibrated with every message that one of your friends or your family sent you congratulations. The light from the device breaks into your not-so-deep sleep, since not even ten minutes had passed since you closed your eyes.
Sheet off you, you stopped hugging the pillow and with a soft grunt reached for your phone, checking notifications with squinted eyes.
You lowered the brightness of your cell phone because of that annoying burning in your eyes and now with more comfort, you wandered around the notifications you had, until one caught your attention completely.
Leon ♡: "Happy birthday, baby. I love you so much."
A smile began to form on your face, and without hesitation you unlocked your cell phone to answer him.
Thanks, Lee :( I miss you and I love you
You weren't expecting a response, after all, he must be busy, right? In Spain it must have been your birthday hours ago, but he still bothered to wait for it to come where you are.
Leon ♡: I miss you too, how have you been?
You didn't think he would have time to respond, but you also didn't want to spend three days without hearing from him, so you took advantage of the opportunity.
I've been fine... I haven't done much, just work and back home :( how about you?
Leon ♡: Tired, but all good. Missing you most of all the time. Tell me, have you done anything interesting?
Does missing you count? :[
Leon ♡: Yeah, it counts, sweet thing. I want to tell you something, okay? But let me call you first.
The fact that he was going to call you made you feel good, he may not be with you on your birthday and he is supposed to arrive days later, but one call is enough to lift your spirits.
You were going to answer but your screen lit up with your boyfriend's contact name and the buttons to answer or hang up the call. You pressed the green button and put it on speaker, placing your phone on your chest with a smile. "Hi..."
"Hello, birthday girl." His voice... You could spend hours listening to him speak, even if he was talking about the most boring topic in the world, you would pay attention from start to finish. "How's my baby doing?"
You giggled, there really wasn't much to say, your birthday had started less than an hour ago, "No crazy, exciting party... My friends have congratulated me, as has my family. My parents must be asleep at this time, so I guess when they wake up they'll call me."
"Yeah, they must be resting at this time, huh. You should, too. It's only because of your birthday that you stay up so late." He answered and you could hear his smirk over the phone, making you blush slightly.
"Of course not... I can sleep late whenever I want." And even if you wanted to, you know it's not possible. Once you get home from work and settle into your boyfriend's arms to sleep, you fall deeply into the arms of Morpheus. It's hard not to sleep well when you have a giant boyfriend pillow. "I can't sleep without you here."
"I know, baby, I know... I can't sleep without my sweet girl hugging me like a damn teddy bear." He chuckled and you did it too. Both of you fell into a small silence, it wasn't awkward, it was comforting. "Hey, baby?" He began, as you settled into the sheets.
"Mhm?" You asked, as you looked at the moon through your bedroom window. Her brilliance seeped in and was strong and radiant.
Watching the moon always gave you a certain comfort, knowing that no matter where Leon is, both of you will always be under the same moon and firmament of stars.
A laugh came through the speaker of your cell phone, the same laugh that makes you feel butterflies in your stomach. "Did you see how beautiful the moon is?"
You smiled, humming a small "mhm" in response, before adding, "Yeah... It's full and very pretty. I wish you were here to watch it together."
Leon let out a small sigh, "Yeah, me too, what if you ask the moon for that?" You chuckled this time. It was a silly thing to do, but, why not?
"Like a birthday wish? But if you know it then it won't come true." Leon could hear the pout in your voice, and he smiled to himself. "Maybe there will be an exception this time." He murmured. "Come on, babe. Do it."
With your eyes closed, you let out a sigh, wishing with all your being that Leon could be by your side as soon as possible, and after a few seconds, you heard him speak, "Did you do it?"
"Yeah, I did... Time to wait I guess." Your gaze met that radiant crater that was seen in its maximum splendor, until something began to click in your head.
"Did you see how beautiful the moon is?" There is supposed to be approximately six hours between your location and Spain, so it was impossible for Leon to see the moon shining in its entirety, but you tried not to give too much thought to the matter, since the moon can also be seen during the day, although at lower exposure.
But if he talked about the moon... And how big it looked... That could mean that maybe he...
"The stars look very bright too." He added after.
"But, you know what I think is more bright?" He began, while his footsteps were heard on the cement, signaling that he had begun to walk.
Until he stopped.
"The brightest thing I'm going to see is your face when you look out the window."
That made you get up from your bed, phone in hand while with clumsy steps thanks to the sheets rolled up between your legs, you reached the window and realized everything.
He is here.
And when he saw that look light up on your face, he knew that the moon was nothing compared to how radiant you looked. "Hey, birthday girl."
It seems like the moon was the perfect alibi for Leon to sneak in and surprise you.
Or simply the moon heard your wishes, and fulfilled them on your special day.
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a/n: OKAY... I'M STILL NERVOUS I PUT THIS ON THREE DIFFERENT GRAMMAR CHECKERS BUT I'M STILL AFRAID i suck at writing tbh but this idea was scratching my brain and i thought Hmm why not SO!!! i hope y'all like it :] i appreciate likes and reblogs annnnnd comments i love comments!!! feel free to give me tips to be better at writing or something THAT'S ALL BYE-BYE 🤲🏻
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shanastoryteller · 1 day
Note
Happy birthday!more female wei wuxian please
a continuation of 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12
If Jiang Cheng is captured or killed, they'll kill Madame Yu and Uncle Jiang and Jiang Cheng. Jiang Yanli is an heir, but not one that can lead their people into battle, and they won’t bother keeping hostages for her benefit.
Wei Wuxian could do it – but with Jiang Cheng gone, she loses her place in the clan, she can't become the wife of their future sect leader if he’s dead. She’s the logical one to lose.
Jiang Cheng is going to kill her. But they’re getting too close to the inn.
She pays a boy to take the medicine and a note back to them in an hour’s time, then whistles, clear and bright cutting through the crowd. The Wen soldiers look at her and she’s hungry and tired but this is her clan’s life on the line here, her sister’s, her fiance’s. “Looking for me?”
There’ a moment of stillness then they’re surging forward and she’s running and they’re chasing and she’s very, very good but they’re fresh. She needs to go someplace they won’t follow.
They’re not too far from Yiling, she thinks.
~
Jiang Cheng is going to kill her.
He wants to go after her, but he doesn’t even know where she is, and that would mean leaving A-jie defenseless on her own, which he can’t do, and Wei Wuxian would never forgive him for doing anyway.
They set a punishing pace to Jin territory, which is where the disciples were instructed to meet up with them. A bit of gamble, but Wei Wuxian had pointed out that Jin Guangshan would likely be playing both sides of the war to his advantage, which is as close to neutral territory as they were going to get.
Once he delivers A-jie to the rest of their disciples, he can leave them to protect her and can leave her to organize them and he can go after Wei Wuxian. He thinks that three hostages is probably one too many – two too many, really, and he wonders how long it will be before his mother’s mouth gets her killed. If they do put her and Wei Wuxian together, that would move up that timetable exponentially.
Part of him is scared Wei Wuxian’s already dead. The rest of him knows better.
If she were dead, the Wen would be flaunting and bragging about. If they’d killed her, they’d be using it to draw him out, but so far there’s been nothing.
Of course, she ruins his plans like always because just when he’s getting ready to go out searching, she appears in the camp and grabs his shoulders and says, “You’ll never guess what I figured out!”
She’s been missing for almost three weeks and just as soon as he feels like he can breathe again he’s going to strangle her. “You!” he hisses and then he’s grabbing her, yanking her into his chest and holding her so tightly that she probably can’t breathe either, although for a different reason.
She’s hugging him back just as tightly, which makes him feel slightly less like he’s losing his mind. He pulls back and she’s wearing robes that she definitely stole and – “Why do you have a flute?”
Wei Wuxian beams, rocking back on her heels.
Most of Jiang Cheng’s relief drains to wariness.
That expression on her face has never meant anything good.
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katszumi · 17 hours
Text
part one but can be read as a standalone!
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today’s the day— the six year reunion for all the graduated u.a students. the day bakugou was internally dreading.
he didn’t want to attend, but because of shitty hair, he basically had no other choice. he thought it was stupid, annoying even considering the fact he still works with some of his old classmates.
plus, bakugou was never the type to attend gatherings. he hated the loud noise, busy moving bodies, and the useless small talk people had just to be respectful. none of it was apart of bakugou’s persona, not even his pr managers could change that.
but, he also knows the slight possibility of you being there. he knows someone extended the invite to you, back then every single classmate loved you.
since the night he rudely brushed you off, you haven’t been in contact with him once. his messages still delivered green, and you unable to show on any of his social media. for him, you only existed as a fragment of his memory other than the times you appear on television or the news.
you seemed to be thriving in america. the first year you went, he remembers seeing an article online on how you quickly climbed the ranks in america, the americans instantly adoring everything about you. despite your hero name and quirk, fans began to relate you to a siren, claiming how you were too captivating and powerful to be true. soon, citizens also began to recognize you as the star-spangled siren.
no doubt, bakugou thought it was hilarious. it was something so incredibly stupid. but it was also a reminder that you accomplished your dream. you were a great hero. all of your fears from six years ago were disregarded, and you proved to yourself that you built yourself up by yourself with no support system.
he always knew you were the strongest within the class. maybe that’s why he always felt so weak in front of you. he didn’t stand a chance against you, especially when he finds your figure standing by the bar.
you were messing with your drink, engaging in conversation with mina and ochako. those were the girls always attached at your hip back then.
at first he questions himself whether to squeeze himself in the conversation, or to leave you be. he figured that if you wanted to talk to him then you would’ve reached out years ago.
but before he could act on anything, your gaze meets his. it feels like time on every clock comes to a halt.
he takes in your new differences from the last time he saw you. you grew an inch or two taller, which he found hilarious since you used to pray to be taller. you’re a little more tan; bakugou remembering somewhere in a textbook that the states received more hours of sunlight than japan. you’ve matured more in your face; you were always the girl he found cute. but now, your gazing eyes were more fierce, your pouting lips that he often found himself sneaking glances at were parted, and your newly developed body; your arms were more toned, your body a tad more curvaceous.
enamored wasn’t even the right word to describe bakugou. an understatement even.
it’s all too strange how he felt a pulsation in his chest, his heart hammering from the small moment of eye-contact. he believed that he got over you, coming to terms that there’d never be a chance that you’d talk to him with dancing eyes and a grin on your face like before. but, oh boy, was he wrong.
guilt immersed him. he was angry with himself for treating you like you didn’t matter. everything you said that day, you were right. he didn’t tell you anything related to his emotions, he was avoiding you for weeks, and he was a dick for simply letting you go. he knew all of this, even years ago he realized. bakugou wasn’t the type to go back on his word nor apologize.
but in order for you to talk to him with even a fake smile on your face, he would have to do just that. though, it was you— he wouldn’t mind getting down on both knees, begging for you to forgive him if he had to.
pathetic, bakugou would say, who in their right mind would do something like that? but he would. because six years later, bakugou was still pathetically in love with you.
mina noticed your shift in eye, so she peered over her shoulder, searching the area for what grabbed your attention. it was quick the way she noticed it was him that snatched your breath. her eyes widened for a small moment before turning her head once again.
mina was probably talking shit about him, that was no surprise. even though he and mina got together well, you and mina were attached at the hip; she valued you more than him. he easily read mina’s body language, you must’ve told mina the situation long ago from the way she placed her palm on your arm and rubbed it gently.
unfortunately, he didn’t care if you or mina would be frustrated with his audacity. if anything, everything he was going to do from this point on was because he cared so much about you. so fuckin’ much he’d drain the ocean dry to prove his love to you.
bakugou had only fallen in love twice. once with you and once with a mirror. one, a destructive on-going path without a clear result. one, someone so far-fetched yet still warm and beautiful. someone that eventually in time becomes part of the oxygen he needs to breathe.
the mirror was the first-choice. becoming the number one hero was his only objective, no matter the opportunity cost, he was going to do anything to reach his goal. halfway through, he realized he chose wrong.
there was no point in reaching the goal without you. you were his hands and feet, so why did he expect himself to be okay with the situation he caused?
bakugou hated defeat, he already knows that. but he’d be damned if he allowed you to slip through his fingers once more.
and just like that, his legs are moving towards you and mina. his mind consisted of nothing; he had no words ready for you, no apology prepared. he just sees you and, like always, he needs to be in your vicinity.
as he marches towards you, he realizes that it’s always been like this, him chasing you to his hearts desire. at the beginning, it was a light jog nothing that would cause him to break a sweat. soon it turned into a full-blown sprint, the gap between you and him seeming to increase every day.
before he could muster anything to say, he makes it to you. he keeps his distance from you so you don’t run away, but enough that he can see the pores on your face.
you ogle at him, your face twisted a bit. mostly likely from the surprise of him trudging towards you as if nothing happened. mina rolled her eyes at him as she folded her arms.
“bakugou, don’t be one of those.” mina started.
“one of what?!”
she scoffed. “one of those obsessive guys when they realized they’ve lost a gem because they were stupid as fuck.” mina him a ‘that’s you’ look. “don’t come crawling back now.”
bakugou opened his mouth to object mina, prepared to go off on her. just a week ago, she was chatting it up with him, kirishima, and denki, no animosity found in any of her statements. but since you were here, she supposed she had to play the part as the protective best-friend.
but before he could say anything, you beat him to it.
“it’s fine, mina.”
your voice was still the most beautiful thing he’s ever heard. so gentle and euphonious. he wanted to thank the heavens on the earth for allowing him this opportunity again even when he’s a shitty guy. he didn’t deserve you, he knew that, but he couldn’t bypass the overwhelming feeling of yearning you.
he shifted in his position, clearly shocked that you didn’t seem to hate the fact he was standing within your vicinity.
mina also shocked, raised a brow at her best-friend. “you sure babes?” you nodded in response. the pink colored woman leaned into her ear, whispering god-knows what, before walking away with ochako to leave you and him alone.
you faced bakugou fully now, your eyes taking in the subtle distinctions he’s made over the years. bakugou always was one of the strongest in the class, but even now, he developed into a rigorous man. you can tell he’s shaved recently, the small hairs on his chin slowly starting to form. his eyes are more relaxed, seeming more generous.
alike him, you too kept post on bakugou in japan. you’d frequently find yourself searching him on the internet to wonder how he’s doing. just like he told you and everyone else at u.a, he was now the number one hero of japan. he proved to all his doubters that he could do it.
you were proud of him, internally rooting him on from 6,303 miles away. however, externally, you masked a look of resentment for him.
he broke your heart when he pushed you away. you didn’t understand why it was so difficult for him to come clean about things, especially when it came to you.
you had enough of it.
or at least that’s what you kept telling yourself, hoping for your heart to believe it as your mind did.
“hi,” you said. he could tell you were nervous from the way your hand slightly trembled. “long time no see.”
bakugou anxiously chuckled, “yeah.” he instinctively ran his fingers through his hair as he swallowed nothing. “look, i’m not even going to waste any time with this. y/n, i am so fuckin’ sorry.” his tone softened, coming from the deepest part of him. you can’t recall a time where his voice ever sounded so tender like this.
“kat—” you started, but he didn’t let you finish.
“no, i mean it. i am sorry for being a coward. i was a fool for treating you like you didn’t matter to me when that wasn’t the case, it was never the case. you were too good for me and that scared me. i’m rough on the outside, i couldn’t imagine savoring someone so mellow. i’m a pathetic asshole, a bitch, a cunt.”
you reached forward to place your hand on his wrist. “don’t say such things about yourself, katsuki. you are not any of those things.”
“don’t be good with me. i don’t deserve to be treated this way. give me the punishment i deserve for causing you anguish.” he begged. unknowingly, his hands slipped into yours. you could feel his sweat accumulate, his shaky hands.
all of this just for you to forgive him. how could you ever despise him when he’s an emotional wreck in the palm of your hands?
“it’s okay, katsuki. i’ve come to forget about it years ago. you’re one of the best things to happen to me during my adolescence. we were young and we both said things we didn’t mean back then.” bakugou looks at you with a pout. “i forgive you.”
you pull bakugou into a hug, wrapping your arms around him. you almost had forgotten how much bigger his figure was compared to yours until he bear-hugs you.
“how long are you staying until you leave for america?” he asks.
“i was going to wait till the end of the night to share this, but i was never one to hold secrets from you.” you released bakugou from the hug, a smile tugging your lips. “i’m coming back to japan.”
“what? but america… why?” he scrambled for words.
you lightly shrugged, “not my kind of place. i also really missed my home.”
“fuckin’ hell,” his words trailed off. bakugou couldn’t imagine the happiness that was coming from him right now. in his mind, he thanked kirishima for dragging him here. “i’m so relieved.”
you laughed, one that bakugou could tell wasn’t fake. he couldn’t help but to smile. he was finally talking to you, the woman he loved, after six long years. he was unsure if he could survive another minute of you ignoring him.
“so, back then, did you?”
“did i what?”
“back then, did you like me? did i really mean something to you?”
bakugou tried to remember if you were ever this dense? what a stupid fuckin’ question, bakugou thinks.
“you were the first person ever to tell me to have desires and to not hold back.” he explains. “did i like you? y/n, i loved you. every part of you, i loved. hell, i still do.” it seemed easier for him to confess, maybe it was from the adrenaline he was feeling in this moment.
but he didn’t care, if anything he was glad. you needed to hear it just as much he needed to admit it to himself.
“then, let’s start over, katsuki. let’s ditch this place, i know you’re not a big fan of parties anyway.”
bakugou knows all too well, he loves it how you remember the smallest parts of him. he loves your consideration and emotional warmth that you’re always quick to offer. even though, the gates were open for you to leave, you stayed.
he knew that his love for you would last a lifetime and would always welcome you with sweet grace and a humble gratitude.
all he can do is nod in response, hoping to suppress his racing heartbeat.
bakugou takes your hand to lead you to the exit of the party. “my job here is done anyway.”
@b134ch-m4h-ey3z @bsallergy
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lancermylove · 1 day
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Body Swap (HC)
Fandom: Obey Me
Pairing: DB x fem!Reader
Warning: None
Requested by: Anon
Prompt: Can you do a body swap headcanon with demon brothers? So basically female MC swap body with one of the brothers
A/N: Hope you like it! Anon, who requests the N.SFW version of this. I don't write for gender bender, especially with 18+ HCs. This one is an exception because it's more emotional and comedic, so sorry!
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Lucifer
Lucifer is the most mature in handling the body swap incident. He doesn't make a big deal about having to deal with being in a woman's body, even though he secretly feels uncomfortable.
If you set any rules for him, he will gladly follow them as it is your body, and Lucifer does not intend to take advantage of it.
He asks Solomon and Barbatos to help resolve this situation as soon as possible. But for some reason, he can be himself without feeling pressured to uphold his title.
On the other hand, you don't like openly showing your emotions, even more than usual. You also feel the pressure of being prideful. It almost feels like things are out of your hands. You don't want to be prideful, but the universe forces you to behave that way. Is this how Lucifer always feels as the Avatar of Pride? Your ego also gets wounded more than usual.
But you can finally take off your...Lucifer's shirt...and get to see the scars of his wings firsthand.
Most of all, you enjoy ordering others around. Even though the brothers know that you are not Lucifer, they still get intimated since you are using the first brother's body.
You would have taken full advantage of this by transforming into Lucifer's demon form, but he already warned you not to do that by threatening you with a tough punishment once you two switch back.
Mammon
He is embarrassed! Why did he switch bodies with you? How is he supposed to sleep and go to the bathroom and stuff? Just the thought of undressing makes his mind explode.
When you suggest using a blindfold or closing his eyes, Mammon tries his best to do things without peeking at your body, even though a part of him is tempted. But no! Respect is more important.
Meanwhile, you have the sudden urge to hoard valuable things and 'borrow' things from others, and the most prominent thing in your mind is money. Money, money, and MONEY!
You feel your greed levels rising and have a hard time to control. Sometimes, you have to talk to Mammon to figure out the best way to control your destructive urges.
"Now, y'know how I feel..."
Those words hit you hard, and you forgive him for everything he has ever done.
While you were protective of the younger brothers before, you have a devastating urge to sacrifice yourself for them, even though your...Mammon's body trembles at the thought of what punishment Lucifer will give him.
You make a mental note to help Mammon get out of punishments in the future when you switch back.
Levi
Absolutely refuses to do anything and sits in his room in a fetal position. He can't even bring himself to go to the bathroom or take a bath. Even if you tell him to clean your body, he will refuse.
Though, Levi feels lighter because he can think more clearly being away from his demonic body. It's almost like he can think more clearly.
For some reason, you start to feel jealous of everything...every little thing to the point where it makes you feel down and suffocated. When you start crying from the feeling, Levi panics and tries to calm you down. After calming down, you realize that he always feels this way - no wonder Levi is always down. You give him (your body) a tight hug, making him blush profusely.
Unfortunately for the brothers, when you become aggravated due to an argument between them, your emotions accidentally summon Lotan. However, the brothers don't blame you for it, and Levi finally realizes how scary it is for the others when he calls Lotan out of nowhere.
You spend the most time in Levi's room and get into a habit of changing into his demon form and wrapping his tail around him (your body) just to get a reaction out of him.
This experience brings you two much closer than before, and Levi trusts you far more than before.
Satan
Oh my Devildom, he doesn't feel angry, even when triggered. This feeling is very difficult for him to get used to, but it's a refreshing change. However, he constantly reminds himself that this is only temporary and that he should not get used to it.
He is also mature about the body swap and does his best to respect your body as best as possible. Even though Satan won't admit it, he finds the experience fascinating and finally understands how a woman's body works. Although, he will never get used to random body aches, especially random lower back pain.
You, on the other hand, are not so fortunate. You feel like you are a ticking time bomb of anger. One little mishap, and you feel like destroying everything around you. Satan tries his best to pacify you, but it doesn't work all the time. At times, Beel and Lucifer have to restrain you after you have a rage episode. Then, you profusely apologize and nearly break into tears. It's a vicious cycle.
This makes you realize just how hard Satan has to work to keep his anger in check, and Satan realizes how difficult it is for his brothers to control him when he gets angry.
Once you switch back, you are tempted to tell Satan to meditate, but the thought of a demon meditating is hilarious yet odd.
Asmo
Asmo is the only one who is excited about the body switch. He doesn't feel uncomfortable in any way and actually enjoys being in your body. He has always wanted to see what it feels like to be a woman.
Even though Asmo is in your body, he has the urge to fix every skin problem you have. If you don't have any, he will continue to take care of your skin for you. He may even go as far as to develop a skincare routine tailored to you. If the two of you stay switched for a long time, he will whip your skin into perfect shape.
Meanwhile, even though you feel beautiful in Asmo's body, there is always a voice in the back of your head that whispers 'what-if' scenarios. What if you stop being beautiful? What if you get breakouts? What if no one loves you? What if others think you are unattractive? The pressure to be beautiful is suffocating. A part of you feels very bad for Asmo and can finally understand why he has to be beautiful at all times.
One thing makes you very uncomfortable, and that is Asmo's urge for desire. His avatar needs physical affection all the time. The thought of getting close to someone in Asmo's body is very disturbing, so he helps you out by cuddling with you whenever you need to get close to someone. At least you are hugging your own body...which is still odd to think about but better than the alternate option.
Beel
He doesn't like the feeling of being shorter and less muscular, but that doesn't stop him from working out. However, you will have to remind him not to start with heavy exercises if you don't work as much as him.
Most of all, he feels odd not having to think about eating 24/7. He can actually focus on other things, and it's a nice change. But he does miss eating endlessly solely for the taste of good food.
Meanwhile, you feel like devouring the entire world's food supply. Nothing you eat, no matter how much and how heavy, satisfies you.
You cannot focus on anything except food. The worst part is that Beel forces you to exercise, following his normal routine. He doesn't want his body to be out of shape.
On the plus side, you can see over most people's heads. You will never lose anyone in a crowd. Also, you have a great deal of strength to the point where you can lift an entire house if you want.
For the time you are in Beel's body, you act like a superhero, saving everyone from the bullies and villains. All you need to do is grab them by their shirt and lift them off the ground with one hand. That is enough to make them petrified.
You also get the pleasure of flexing in front of the mirror and admiring Beel's rock-hard muscles to your heart's content.
Belphie
He finds the situation hilarious and doesn't seem to care. Belphie almost has a 'it is what it is' reaction. Initially, he thinks his sloth-like nature will pass to your body but soon realizes that he has a lot more energy to do anything and everything he wants.
Belphie decides to use this chance to fulfill this bucket list before he returns to his sleepy body. Of course, he drags you with him everything, much to your dismay.
You feel sleepy, lazy, and lethargic. No matter how much you sleep, it's never enough. Your brain always feels hazy to the point where you can't even think straight. How does Belphie constantly put up with this? No wonder he sleeps most of the day.
You secretly try to consume caffeine products, but nothing works to keep you awake. Sometimes, Beel has to carry you around because you get into a habit of falling asleep anywhere at any time.
Though you don't tell Belphie, you are secretly happy to return to your body. A part of you doesn't feel like sleeping for days as you got all the sleep you needed in the few days you were in Belphie's body.
----
Epilogue:
After you switch back, you finally understand why the brothers behave the way they do. While you don't say it aloud, you believe the avatars are more curses than anything else. However, you learn to sympathize with them more. How do they deal with the curse every day? They are strong.
So, the next time Lucifer gets prideful, Mammon gets greedy, Levi gets jealous, Satan gets angry, Asmo goes on about beauty, Beel eats endlessly, and Belphie dozes off, you don't get mad at them. All you do is hug them and tell them, "It's okay."
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➣  Obey Me Masterlist: [1][2][3] ➣ Main Masterlist
➣ Buy me a Ko-fi? ➣ Commission: Open
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Meadow (Drabble)
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Series Masterpost | Main Masterpost
My last fic here in a while. Please consider following me on AO3 💖❤️
Summary: Javier hears you singing to his newborn.
Pairing: Javier Peña x reader (no y/n)
Tags: Domestic, sugary fluff, Javi POV, babies!
Word count: 850
Meadow
Javier tries to be quiet as he returns to you, carrying a stuffed Eeyore in his hand while listening for the sound of Inés' unhappy hiccups. He calculates his steps on the ground to make sure not to step on a twig or a branch, the crackle of it sure to distress his newborn even more.
He finds that the tall grass dotted with wildflowers and the soft earth is forgiving of his feet, so much so that his presence goes completely unnoticed by you. He never knew that this spot existed, having always treated the road as nothing more but a road until you showed him that its surroundings were so much more. There’s a metaphor somewhere in that, something about him just passing through and you making him able to stop and take a look around. 
The sun is warm on his exposed skin, his sleeves rolled up to his elbows and you have convinced him to leave the jeans for a pair of comfortable slacks instead. He checks the time to see how long he has been gone and it’s nothing more than a few minutes, realizes that the sun is starting to fade from being at its highest point today. 
As he draws nearer to the spot you chose, Inés’ cries have died down completely until they are not heard at all. Instead, it is the soft sound of your voice that drifts through the air to him. You are singing quietly to his daughter, a lullaby that he remembers having heard before in a distant memory of his own childhood. 
A breeze rustles the leaves of the oak tree you sit beneath, its crown of leaves protecting you both from direct sunlight. As if forced by nature to relax, he hears the birds chirping too. This is peace and contentment, he thinks, and how wonderful it is to do nothing with the people that he loves the most. 
When he finally spots you, he finds you sitting on the blanket you brought with your sweater tucked underneath your slightly bent knees. Inés is resting in your lap, cradled by your soft arms, and sleeping soundly with her tiny fingers curled into fists. You are so beautiful as you stare down into his daughter’s blissful face, your smile even warmer in the soft glow of the sun. 
Occasionally, you run a thumb over the length of her nose but you never stop singing to her. The stuffed animal seems a waste of time now but if he hadn’t gotten it from the car, he would have never caught you like this. 
How has he gotten so lucky, he wonders, to have such an incredible woman to be the witness of his life? He cannot believe how sentimental you have made him, his chest aching as he watches your beauty grow even further as it is enhanced by the nature around you. More than a decade in Colombia and he thought he would never feel anything again. How ridiculous a thought that is. 
When he finally makes himself known again, bursting the bubble of quiet admiration he has been in, you turn your head when he kneels down beside you. You stop singing but Inés sleeps on.
Without a word, you notice Javier and then smile until it widens into a grin on your face that outshines the summer sunshine. He smiles back and places Eeyore on the ground in front of you, purposefully posing him to stand in the grass because you always hate when he is careless about stuffed toys. 
“I hope he doesn’t mind getting left in the car,” he whispers as he makes sure Eeyore won’t tip over, “Sorry it took a bit.”
“It’s okay,” you say quietly, “You have made it up to him; grass is his favorite.” 
“Papá! There are frogs here!” Suddenly, his four-year-old son emerges from somewhere in the tall grass, carrying a stick in his hand that he seems to be using as a sword. He grins widely as he approaches the three of you, nearly stumbling over his own feet as he walks quickly on the uneven ground and Javier holds out his hand in case he has to catch him.
“Careful, Muchacho (young man),” Javier chuckles, “You might scare them away if you trip.” 
“I found the biggest frog ever!” Lucas brags and falls into his father’s embrace, throwing his arms around his neck, “I want to show you!”
Javier looks at you to silently ask if you need him. Lucas presses on, “Come on, Dad!”
Inés fusses a little at being woken up by the noises around her. You take the stuffed animal and wiggle it in the air in front of her. You start singing again. It is something about meadows and daisies, something about being warm and kept from harm. 
“Go,” you stop briefly to urge him, “We’ll be here when you come back.”
And as Javier gets up from the ground and takes his son’s hand, he smiles because he knows that you will.
.
.
.
My last fic here in a while. Please consider following me on AO3 💖❤️
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weneeya · 2 days
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comforting nanami after a long day ??
Angst to fluff ofc, he starts being dry over text and accidentally ignores u at home but then realizes and apologizes and we comfort him <3
Some peaceful time
hurt to comfort with Nanami
YES omg I love this idea as much as I love nanami himself, thank you for this!! feel free to request :)
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Nanami Kento wasn’t the type to do anything that could hurt you. In fact, he was always really careful about it because he loved you so much ; doing anything bad to you was probably the worst thing for him. But today was complicated. 
He had a difficult day, a way too long one which seemed to never come to an end. You tried to text him, because you started to worry as he was usually never this late. Except that you didn’t think he would be this harsh to you. His messages were dry, more than they have ever been to you. It was almost like you were annoying him. 
You decided to wait until he came home, so you could understand what was happening. But when he finally came back, he didn’t even glance in your direction. You stood up to welcome him, but your husband simply made his way to the kitchen without caring about your presence. It hurt, you had to admit it. He never treated you this way and you thought that you did something wrong. 
You decided to leave him alone, not wanting to be more of a burden than you already seemed to be to him. You joined the living room again, sitting on the couch and taking back the book you were previously reading. Maybe it would help you think about something else. 
As Kento was drinking the coffee he just made, as it would be a good idea, a long sigh left his lips. He turned around to say something, before he noticed that you were gone. This is when he realized what he had done since he came home. He closed his eyes, another sigh leaving his lips. He massaged his temple for a moment, before he came back to the living room. 
He simply walked towards you, before kneeling in front of you. You put your book on the side, a slight frown over your face. What was he doing exactly? Nanami took the book from your hands, putting it on the table behind him. Then, he took your hand between his and left a kiss on top of it. You finally met his gaze, and you could see how tired he seemed to be. 
“I’m sorry my love, I shouldn’t have acted this way with you. Forgive me, please,” he said, and you didn’t give him the time to say anything more. You made him stand up, and guided him to sit next to you on the couch. Kento let you do it, as he didn’t have the strength to disagree anyway. 
In no time, he was now laying down on the couch, with his head on your thighs. Your fingers were slowly running through his hair, and he had his eyes closed. He could almost be falling asleep right now. Nobody was able to ease his heart and his mind as much as you could do it. 
“How about you take a few days off? You need it, Kento,” you started, and he simply hummed as an answer. You were probably right, he really needed those days to take some time. Not only for himself, but also for you. You deserved to be treated better, and he was ready to spend his days off only by taking care of you. You were the best thing that ever happened in his life.
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as I always say, here's the best husband anyone could dream of <3 thank you for reading!!
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What do you think would happen if after the end of the Brucequest, Tim didn't forgive the Justice League for not helping him.
Like maybe he forgave the BatFamily instantly, because to him not forgiving them wasn't even an option, but it was still an horrible year for him and he kinda wanted to vent at someone, so he basically said to the JL that since he didn't get any help from all of them at the worst time of his life, they shouldn't expect any help from him unless it's a world ending crisis.
He's not a main JL member so he wasn't expecting anything to change, he just wanted to get angry at someone, since he's not angry at all with his family, but at the very least before the end of the day he would get Young justice completely on his side
I've seen a few fics (can't remember them rn) that show YJ pulling their support of the JL after Tim's whole debacle with them. I heavily support this decision and believe it should have been the move they pulled. Part of YJ's founding and operation relied on the fact the the kids were not being supported by the adult superheroes. They found each other and, sometimes, only had each other to rely on.
After the JL demonstrated that they are unfit to take care of the younger generation by their mass lack of support to what they perceived was a grieving teen on the verge of a mental breakdown? Fuck 'em. YJ is better off without them. They were hands off anyways.
A cool aspect of this would be YJ's refusal to the JL showing the adults how the younger generation supported the JL. They ran all sorts of missions, helped with tech support, and generally did background maintenance (in a literal and more general sense) for the JL. It wouldn't necessarily devastate JL, but it would leave them unbalanced and scrambling for a bit.
It would be hella cool to see YJ and others in his generation deciding to be the buffer between the JL and heroes even younger than them (aka Damian's generation). They would offer the support and aid that YJ typically went without.
I do think that YJ would support Tim's decision, Cassie being a major proponent of it. If, theoretically, they others didn't pull their support to the JL, they would at least give the older heroes a cold shoulder and harsher attitude.
The difference between the batfam and the JL is the level of responsibility and relationships they have with Tim. The JL is a group of heroes that are supposed to do good. Tim probably would hold a harsher grudge against them because of this (what if they treated others they were supposed to save in the same way). The Bats are extremely dysfunctional, but I imagine they would try to make amends (except Bruce, but I also hate him, so...). Tim would forgive them because he loves them, he understands the circumstances they were under, and they tried to apologize.
Anyways, Tim should be able to save "fuck you" to the JL for the BruceQuest.
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rmsrkive · 1 day
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𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐈 𝐌𝐀𝐃𝐄 𝐅𝐎𝐑? | 𝐌𝐘 𝐒𝐓𝐑𝐀𝐍𝐆𝐄 𝐀𝐃𝐃𝐈𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 — 𝐁𝐓𝐒
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summary: in which bts find themselves completely and utterly infatuated with one of the members of hybe’s newest girl group, le sserafim, developing a strange and unhealthy addiction to their junior
warnings: age gap (3-8 year age gap), oc is of consenting and legal age, yandere bts, unhealthy, possessive, and obsessive behavior, violence, idol au
a/n: here is the next oneshot of my strange addiction! i wanted to dedicate the second oneshot to providing a backstory of oc's life before she became an idol and what led her to quit her passion as a gymnast. i DO NOT know much about gymnastics so please forgive me for how vague this entire oneshot seems! if there are any inaccuracies, i apologize in advance and hope you understand. thank you! (also no bangtan in this one)
rating: 18+ (minors dni)
pairings: ot7 x fem reader
word count: 7479
taglist [CLOSED]: @thepixienamednyxie @inlovewithallmusic @afiaaaa19 @minchedchilli @severuslovebot @jjkluver7 @solaany @taekritimin123 @notvantaes @jewishmommy @weeeeeekly @0rubyrose0 @thechillmage @cuntessaiii @earth2joon @huni7857 @yukichan67 @coralmusicblaze @ts-1030 @mochisdayone @devilzliaison @hollyschit @whenthebeatdrop-beatdrop @crushedblackroses @xicanacorpse @blackswan446 @stopeatread @iammeandmeisiam @monysakura @iveivory
taglist note: the taglist for my strange addiction is CLOSED. if you asked to be added to the taglist prior to this oneshot being published but i did NOT add you, please let me know so i can add you right away,
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Gymnastics was the only stability you had in your life.
When you were ten, your parents divorced. Constant fights were between them, often over minuscule subjects that were not worth arguing over. Their marriage had been strained before you were even born but they stayed together once they found out that your mom was pregnant with you. Holding onto a broken marriage for the sake of your surprise baby was an impressive feat but it only meant that they held resentment toward you. To your parents, you were the sole reason why they had yet to divorce. They were both tied down to you because they had to raise you and while they thought they were preventing you from growing up in a broken home, you were actually susceptible to their resentment.
They eventually divorced, leaving you amid a failed marriage. You tried picking up the broken pieces, desperately scrambling around in hopes they would love each other once again. Your attempts were futile and soon enough, you found yourself being exchanged at a random gas station every other weekend.
Not too long after they divorced, both of your parents found a new significant other and before you knew it, you had two additional parents and several step-siblings in your life. It rubbed you the wrong way how quickly they seemed to move on. Granted, they were in a loveless marriage for quite some time but to you, it seemed like they weren't mourning the loss of the family. You loved your step-parents and step-siblings more than anything as they welcomed you into their lives with open arms but sometimes you wished they didn't appear in your life so soon after your parents divorced. The wound of having split parents was too fresh and gaining new family members within a year of the divorce only added more pain.
You had three biological older siblings, two brothers, and one sister. All three of them were significantly older than you and by the time you were old enough to form a proper relationship with them, they were off to college to pursue their own future. Even now years later, you barely had a relationship with them. In your eyes, they were complete strangers with only the bond of a shared bloodline linking all of you. There was never a second thought about any of them.
When you were in elementary and middle school, you missed out on school often for gymnastics competitions around the world. After moving up to the junior level, you found yourself having to skip more and more school days to practice and prepare for all of the competitions you had to partake in. All of the friendships you had eventually dwindled away until you were left with your friends from the gym. Eventually, those friendships became rivalries as you competed against the same girls you once called your best friends.
Being a gymnast was the only constant in your life.
While everybody in your life slowly left you, you continued to pursue your career as a professional gymnast. The losses never swayed you as long as your hard work meant that you would end up with an Olympic title. Your only concern was reaching the goals you set for yourself once you determined in your heart that you would become a professional gymnast, no matter what it took.
But sometimes you wished you held onto your friendships and relationships tighter.
"I have never seen such sloppy technique from you, Y/N." Your coach glowered at you, a murderous glint in her eye. "The Olympics are right around the corner and here you are struggling with even the simplest of elements. Do you think you deserve to go to the Olympics when there are dozens of girls out there who are much better than you?"
You winced at her insult, your face burning in shame as you stared at the ground. Truth be told, you had no excuse as to why your practices weren't the best lately. Having an off day was normal for any athletes but you were having an unacceptable amount. In fact, you had been practicing poorly ever since you were named to be on the Olympic team.
"I'm sorry," You mumbled, looking up at your coach. "I'm trying my best."
"Your best isn't enough anymore, Y/N. If this is considered your best, what are you going to do when you get to Tokyo? Hoping that doing your best will get you an Olympic medal is a joke. You need to snap out of whatever mind block you're stuck in if you want to win a medal."
The pain from sinking your teeth into your bottom lip startled you, the taste of metallic mixing with the sting of your broken skin. Your coach sighed, rubbing her forehead as her gaze on you softened.
"You have a lot of potential, Y/N. I may be biased because you're my student but I know that you can win at least one gold medal in Tokyo. I've seen what you can do and you're miles above every other gymnast who qualified for the Olympics. Even if times are tough now, competing at the biggest competition in the world will be worth it. I promise it'll get better even if it feels like it won't. I believe in you, Y/N and I hope you believe in yourself too."
"Yes, coach." You nodded your head.
"We'll end practice early today. Go home and get some rest."
It was days like these where you wished you had someone to lean on and receive comfort from. Not a single person came to mind as you trudged to the locker room with tears burning your eyes, the stress of making it to the Olympics gradually growing on you. Nowadays, you often wake up with your heart pounding out of your chest and sweat dripping down your face as if you experienced a nightmare because of the stress that was weighing down on you. The second you realized you were awake, a feeling of dread washed over you as you thought about the future that lay ahead. The type of mindset and lifestyle that was overtaking your life was exhausting, to say the least.
Nevertheless, you powered through each and every day because giving up was not an option. You worked far too hard since you were three to quit gymnastics when the Olympics were right around the corner. You couldn't do that to your parents, who had put money and time into ensuring you would have a successful career. You couldn't do that to your older siblings who had their attention ripped away from them so their parents could focus on their youngest child. You couldn't do that to your coach who had spent the past five years pushing you and helping you become a better gymnast even when you were sure that you reached your limit. Too many people sacrificed a part of themselves for you to become one of the top gymnasts in the world; if you quit now, it would be a slap in the face to them.
How could you do that to the people you loved?
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Y/N Y/L/N: The Gold Medal Favorite for the 2020 Tokyo Olympics
As the 2020 Tokyo Olympics is just around the corner, there are several names to look out for; Naomi Osaka, Simone Biles, Katie Ledecky, Allyson Felix, yet there is one athlete who has made a name for herself over the past four years: Y/N Y/L/N.
From the Republic of Korea, Y/L/N has made quite a name for herself in gymnastics. Her specialty is floor and she has blown the world away with her routines over the past few seasons. She has displayed extraordinary skills and tricks in her routines throughout the past few years. With several national and international titles, Y/L/N has become one of the favorites for an Olympic gold medal.
Hundreds of thousands of fans from around the world are said to be tuning into the Olympics to see her compete. She is currently one of South Korea's most famous athletes, being recognized among figure skating Olympic champion Kim Yuna and the legendary Son Heungmin. If Y/L/N wins an Olympic title in Tokyo this summer, she will be added to the Korean Sports Hall of Fame.
"Wow, the media is trying hard to push the Olympic champion agenda onto you." Yuri made a face, glad that she wasn't the one constantly in the spotlight. "This would make me want to kill myself."
"You're telling me." You mumbled.
Yuri liked to FaceTime you out of the blue despite being on the other side of the world. Ever since she started attending university, she found herself with more free time since she was no longer studying for the college entrance exam. Your step-sister was naturally a sociable person so you knew it killed her inside to dial down her social life once she began high school. You barely had any contact with her for the four years she was studying but now that she made it into South Korea's top university, all of her stress disappeared.
"What if you just quit gymnastics?" Yunchan wondered.
Yunchan was Yuri's older brother and he also was accepted to Seoul National University. You didn't expect any less from them as they had been extremely intelligent since you met them but having them attend the same university meant that they could bother you even more. As much as you loved your step-siblings, they annoyed you whenever they decided to bother you at random hours of the day.
"I've been thinking about it." You grumbled. "Don't give me ideas."
"What!?"
It was the first time saying out loud that you were thinking about quitting gymnastics. Every athlete at some point thought about quitting their beloved sport and even if they said it out loud, it was mostly an empty threat. You, on the other hand, were getting closer and closer to retiring each day. The toll that the wretched sport was taking on your mental and physical health was becoming gradually worse. As you progressed further in your career, more expectations were weighed down on your shoulders; you felt as if you couldn't make even the tiniest mistake without being berated. Ever since you began winning more competitions, it seemed as if the world was expecting perfection from you. You heard it from your coach and you heard it from the media and fans as well. While you didn't go out of your way to read articles and social media posts about you, some things did pop up on your feed which typically consisted of very opinionated comments.
On top of waking up with a start every morning, you were struggling to fall asleep. With the stress of a big competition around the corner, you found yourself unable to sleep with the tension and nerves weighing down on you. Melatonin helped for a little bit but eventually was no help. Every piece of advice provided by medical professionals and random strangers on the Internet was of no avail as well.
"Level with us, Y/Nie." Yunchan interrupted your train of thought. He noticed your troubled expression and mirrored it, worried that you were silently struggling and had been for a really long time. "You know we won't judge you and we're always here for you." Yuri nodded her head rapidly in agreement to show her support.
You pursed your lips together. "I don't like being a gymnast anymore. I think it's time for me to retire."
"Retire?" Yuri questioned incredulously. "You just turned 21. What do you mean it's time for you to retire?"
You couldn't help but smile at her remark, amused that she was assuming you were talking about retirement due to your age. "Not because I think I'm old, I'm just not happy being a gymnast. It's all I've been my entire life and I want to explore past that."
"That's true, you've definitely been tied down to gymnastics once people began to realize that you're very talented." Yunchan mused.
When he was younger, he heard his mom talking often about a girl named Y/N who was an incredible gymnast. You were a prodigy, somebody who was going to make it big in not only the world of gymnastics but in the world of athletes as well. He heard your name constantly until he met you one random day, being introduced to each other as step-siblings. Yunchan felt like he knew you inside and out before he even met you because of how much your dad talked about you.
"I guess I've been feeling unmotivated since the pandemic started," You confessed. "Having to train alone was exhausting; I was lucky that I had access to the gym but gymnastics became boring after not competing for so long and it still feels that way sometimes. Not only that, the media talks about how I'm the favorite for an Olympic gold medal and the way I'm being compared to Kim Yuna and Son Heungmin—the Kim Yuna and Son Heungmin mind you—is getting to me and the pressure has been stressing me out. The more expectations weighed down on me, the more I resent gymnastics. And now I don't want to compete anymore."
"Oh, unnie."
Yuri and Yunchan frowned, pitifully staring at you through the screen. You mustered a small smile, trying to hold back the tears that formed in your eyes out of frustration. You felt like a weight was somewhat lifted off of your shoulders after rambling to them but you had a lot more baggage to unpack. Confiding in somebody about the problems you had was the first step; acting upon them in a way that you would be happy with the end result was the final goal and quite frankly, it seemed as if you weren't going to reach it anytime soon.
"I don't know what to do anymore." You whispered, staring at your calloused hands that reflected the years of hardships endured from being a gymnast. "Don't get me wrong, I'm extremely grateful that my parents put in years of hard work and sacrifice so that I could be where I am today but why should I compete at the Olympics if I'm not happy anymore? There are so many gymnasts who didn't qualify for the Olympics that deserve my spot more than me. I guess I just feel bad about the entire situation."
"You deserve that position more than anyone, Y/Nie. It may be hard to believe but you know that you worked hard and sacrificed everything to make it where you are today. Sure, you may think that someone else is more deserving of your spot just because you don't want to be a gymnast anymore but that doesn't necessarily mean somebody should take your spot." Yuri said.
Yunchan nodded his head. "If you want to retire after the Olympics, then that's fine. I'm sure other athletes are in the same situation as you so there is nothing to feel bad about. It's okay to outgrow and move on from gymnastics because being a gymnast has been your identity for most of your life. You have the right to move beyond that and find something else that makes you happy." He added.
Your step-siblings were the youngest on both sides of your family yet they were wise beyond their years. You began to confide in them more as all three of you grew older and they never failed to provide you with comfort and advice. While your older siblings left you behind to start their own lives, Yuri and Yunchan immediately took their place. You were grateful that they were able to give you the relationship you always wanted with your older siblings but at the same time, you felt guilty for never making an effort to become closer to them
"Thanks, guys, I appreciate both of you so much." You sighed. "Even when we're on opposite sides of the world I can rely on you guys always. Where would I be without the two of the most important people in my life?"
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One downside of the Olympics being held in Tokyo was having to travel to the other side of the world. You were lucky to have booked a non-stop flight that allowed you to reach Japan in twelve hours but the total travel time including getting through security and trying to get to your hotel was well over twelve hours. You collapsed on your bed the moment you walked into your hotel room, eager to take a nap before dinner.
Your first practice was in two days and it was an unofficial practice. Your coach managed to squeeze in practice for you and the other Korean gymnasts to get a feel of what the gym was like. There was nothing worse than stepping into a competition without adjusting to the new environment; any extra practices made all the difference in how you and your teammates performed.
You turned onto your back and grabbed your phone from your pocket, pulling up YouTube to watch the latest episodes of Going Seventeen that you missed. You barely had any free time to indulge in your favorite K-pop group because you were too busy practicing. Now that you had free time until the next day, you were prepared to spend every second catching up on Seventeen content you missed.
"Y/N, open the door!"
With a groan, you rolled off of your bed and trudged over to the door. You swung the door open to see your teammates standing on the other side, displeased with how they interrupted your free time. They were all dressed up, looking much more put together than they did when you arrived in Tokyo. Yunseo and Seojeong looked at you up and down, unimpressed how your outfit still consisted of the hoodie and sweats you wore on the plane. Haksoen, Hansol, Junho, Jeahwan, and Sunghyun weren't amused by the situation either.
"Why aren't you dressed, unnie?" Yunseo was miffed.
"What do you mean why aren't I dressed?" You furrowed your eyebrows before looking down at the clothes you were wearing. "I'm not going anywhere."
"I told you she didn't read our messages." Hansol piped up.
You grabbed your phone off of your bed and swiped down on your notifications coming to find that your teammates discussed going out for dinner to explore Tokyo. Admittedly, you muted the group chat and put your phone on Do Not Disturb after their countless messages interrupted Don't Lie III. How could you watch in peace when their messages were bombarding you?
"Sorry." You sheepishly rubbed the back of your neck. "I was watching Going Seventeen."
"I knew that was the reason why she wasn't responding." Sunghyun rolled his eyes. "If she's too busy to answer us it's because she's looking at other men."
Seojeong wagged her finger at him disapprovingly. "Don't be jealous, Sunghyun."
This time it was you who rolled your eyes. You made a show of closing the door on them but they all protested, filing inside one by one and settling into your room.
"We'll wait while you get ready, unnie." Yunseo smiled sweetly. "Just don't take too long or else Junho oppa might bite your head off."
"Hey, uncalled for." Junho frowned.
You hastily grabbed a random outfit from your suitcase before ducking away into the bathroom to freshen up. Quite honestly, you didn't want to go out but also knew you had limited time to explore Tokyo. It was clear that Yunseo and Seojeong had an itinerary for your time in Tokyo because they immediately dragged the rest of the team to a restaurant that had a table prepared for all of you.
After eating a filling dinner of ramen and udon, the younger girls led the group to a shopping center. Yunseo linked arms with you, giggling as she pulled you down the bustling sidewalk away from everybody else. She sensed your dampened mood when she walked into your hotel room and was worried about your mental state declining right before the Olympics. Although she didn't train with you, Yunseo could tell you were silently battling an inner conflict.
"How are you, unnie?" She asked, deciding it was better to be straightforward rather than beat around the bush. "I feel like we haven't spoken much since we got here."
"I flew in this morning, Yunseo." You smiled amusedly.
"Exactly." The younger girl cleared her throat before turning to you with a serious expression. "Are you okay, unnie? You've been really quiet and seem kind of down. I wanted to make sure you're fine."
You were touched that Yunseo was making an effort to reach out to you but were also worried that you were being too obvious about your struggles. "I'm fine. Just stressed about competing." A simple yet honest answer would surely suffice.
Yunseo raised her eyebrows, unconvinced by your answer. Your constant slumped shoulders and downcast eyes were a clear indication that you weren't feeling well both physically and mentally. Nevertheless, she dropped the topic, opting to respect your answer rather than prying for more information. "That's valid. This might not mean much to you but I know you're gonna do amazing like always. You've never placed off the podium since you moved up to the senior level and you're only getting better from here. If there's anybody on our team who's gonna walk away with an Olympic medal, it's you."
"Thanks, Yunnie. I really appreciate that you're looking out for me even if you're stressed about your events." You smiled.
She paused in the middle of the sidewalk, wrapping her arms around your torso before pulling you into a tight hug. "I'm proud of you for making it this far, unnie."
The rest of the group stopped in front of you, confused as to why the two of you were sharing a sentimental moment in the streets of Tokyo. They glanced at one another before continuing to walk past, only having eyes for the luxury stores lined up one after another.
Yunseo pulled away before cupping your face with her hands. "You'll do great. Remember: you're a gold medal favorite. You're going to walk away with an Olympic medal."
'You're a gold medal favorite. You have to walk away with an Olympic medal.'
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You jolted awake, immediately pushing yourself upright. Your head whipped back and forth as you tried to make sense of where you were and why you weren't in your own bedroom. After a few seconds, you came to the realization that you were in the Olympic Village. A heavy sigh escaped your lips as you calmed yourself down, checking the time on your phone. It was seven in the morning and you had a few hours until your final practice before the all-around individual event. A sense of dread flooded you as you thought about how your first Olympics competition was right around the corner. Despite having an empty stomach, you were quite nauseous and felt the need to throw up.
The past week in Tokyo had been miserable, to say the least. Your practices hadn't been the greatest and your coaches were getting frustrated with you. The days leading up to the Olympics had been filled with failed routines and they assumed you would be fine once you landed in Tokyo. Their assumptions were wrong, however, and you found yourself struggling to make it through a clean routine. Your hopes of getting an Olympic medal seemed to be getting slimmer and slimmer. Despite your constant mistakes, your coaches still had hope that you would end up somewhere on the podium. After all, you had never placed lower than third in any competition since you moved up to the senior level.
You had a quiet morning to yourself as you got ready for the day, which only made your nerves worse. Hundreds of thoughts and scenarios flew through your mind, countless 'what ifs?' taunting you. At breakfast, the only thing you could do was stare at your food and play around with it while your teammates happily conversed amongst one another, seemingly unbothered by the tense situation all of you were in. They spared worried glances at you, taking turns to urge you to eat and ask if you were okay. You ate a quarter of your breakfast before scurrying off to practice, avoiding the concerned glances of your teammates.
Fortunately, your body and mind cooperated with you enough to have a decent last practice. It certainly wasn't the best practice of your career but you felt significantly better than you had for the past few months. At this point, any feeling of positivity was enough to get you through the games and you were desperate enough to hold onto any optimism you could.
"Representing the Republic of Korea, Y/N, Y/L/N!"
To say you were intimidated to perform on the uneven bars after Suni Lee was an understatement. Everybody in the gymnastics community knew Suni Lee and everybody also knew that uneven bars were her strong suit. She was currently one of the best, if not the best gymnasts on uneven bars, and you were given the misfortune of competing right after her. It didn't help that uneven bars were not your forte whatsoever.
You took a deep breath, trying to calm your wildly pounding heart. You stared up at the high bar above you, taunted by a simple wooden rod that you had learned to use years ago. Your uneven bars routine was something you perfected long ago yet you were still terrified. Before you could second guess yourself, you launched yourself up to the high bar with the vault, performing your routine on complete autopilot mode.
The strength it took for uneven bars was unbelievable. Trying to build your muscles to be able to rotate your body 360 degrees and throw yourself between both bars was excruciating. Your hands were covered in callouses from your hands constantly dragging across the wooden surface, a symbol of the hard work you put in for the past seventeen years. Your combinations weren't as impressive as Suni's but it was enough to put your score on par with hers. You landed on the ground perfectly, putting your hands up with a smile to indicate the end of your performance.
"Wonderful job, Y/N. That was fantastic." Your coach gave you a high-five.
You were halfway through the all-around event, with beam and floor remaining. You specialized in beam for half of your career before you came to the sudden realization that floor routines were much more exciting. Having your strongest routines during the latter half of the event allowed you to make up for any points you may have lost during vault and uneven bars.
Throughout the entirety of the event, you were competing head-to-head with Suni and Rebeca Andrade. Going into the Olympics, you knew they would be your top competition but severely underestimated their skills. You assumed at least one of the events would be their weakness but they were perfecting every one of their routines.
"This is where you have to do the best, Y/N. If you score well on your floor routine, you can place first overall because you have an advantage in your technical skills. Whether or not you leave with an Olympic title depends on your performance." Your coach squeezed your shoulders.
All she got in return was a tight smile. If there was one thing your coach was good at other than helping you improve your gymnastics skills, it was giving you advice and words of encouragement that made you feel worse than when you started. You simply gave her a nod before moving to the corner of the spring floor where you would begin your performance. Yunseo and Seojeong were dispersed on opposite corners of the floor as they insisted you needed full support on all sides. After your name was announced, you took your place on the mat with a faux smile while waiting for the music to start.
Your first skill was a Dos Santos II, which was something you had been practicing for two years. It was by far the most difficult technique you had learned and your coach was extremely hesitant in allowing you to add it to your floor routine, let alone allow you to learn it. Daiane Dos Santos was the only gymnast who had landed it in a competition and there was a reason for that. Regardless, you begged your coach to practice it and had been attempting it in the past two competitions. They had yet to be landed cleanly but you did execute the skill perfectly during countless practices. If you weren't confident in landing it in competition, you wouldn't have wanted to attempt it at the Olympics.
A Dos Santos II consisted of an Arabian double salto in a stretched position with a level H rating. Simply landing this skill would put your technical score miles ahead of your competitors and could even guarantee an Olympic title. You knew you wouldn't be happy with yourself if you left Tokyo without at least attempting it. Since it was your opening skill, you didn't have much time to mentally prepare for it. The most you could do was take deep breaths and focus on the music to keep you on time.
The Dos Santos II was over before you could process it. By the time you launched yourself into the air, you were already back on your feet ready to move onto the next part of your routine. Everything happened so quickly that you couldn't celebrate landing one of the most difficult moves in gymnastics. You could vaguely hear your coach and teammates scream in the background but their voices were muffled. The rest of your routine was filled with skills you could complete in your sleep, which left you in your ending posing before you knew it.
With a heavy sigh, your shoulders immediately slackened as you dropped your ending pose. You bowed to the audience before hopping off of the springboard where your coach and teammates were waiting.
"That was amazing, Y/N! That Dos Santos was beautiful, it was the best you ever landed it." Your coach beamed.
"I can't believe I actually landed it." You grinned, happiness overtaking you for the first time since the competition began. "It happened so quickly and it doesn't even feel like I attempted it."
Seojeong and Yunseo pulled you into a hug, forcing you to jump up and down with them. They each squealed unintelligible exclamations in your ear, rambling about the Dos Santos II and how well you performed.
"Great job, Y/Nie." Hanseok patted your head. "You have a big chance at winning gold!"
His words caused you to freeze for a split second. You whipped your head toward the screen that was displaying the current rankings before you performed. You waited with bated breath as the judges calculated your final score, taking their time as it was the final performance of the night. A slow-motion playback of your routine was on the jumbo screen and while you may sound cocky, surely you were going to score the highest with how well you performed.
"The scores please for Y/N Y/L/N."
Yunseo squealed and clung onto your shoulders with a death grip. "Oh, I'm so scared and I'm not even the one who performed."
You needed to score higher than 13.7 points to place first to make up for the points you didn't acquire during vault and uneven bars. Suni was sitting comfortably in first place with a higher chance of winning the Olympic title but your Dos Santos II was close to leaving her in second place. You were relying on your technical score to push you into first place.
"Y/N Y/L/N has received a score of 13.933 points."
It certainly wasn't your highest score but it was enough to put you in first place. The jumbo screen flashed the final ranking up on the screen with your name at the very top.
A breath you didn't know you were holding escaped from your lips as your score popped up on the screen. You scored well enough on your floor routine to put you into first place; you were returning to Korea with an Olympic medal. All of the stress that had been burdening you finally disappeared and for the first time in months, you felt like you could breathe.
"Fantastic job, Y/N! You did wonderful!" Your coach patted your shoulder and gave you a tight hug.
Your teammates came running over, tackling you into a hug that left all of you in a pile of limbs. You were at the bottom of the pile, trying to hug them back while simultaneously struggling to breathe. Jeahwan, bless his heart, took notice of you turning purple and immediately pulled your teammates off of you.
A giggle escaped your lips at your excitement as they yanked you off the ground only to pull you into another hug. The pressure you felt throughout the season slowly dissipated, leaving you in a state of bliss.
Until the individual floor event, at least.
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"I think I'm gonna throw up." You mumbled, unable to suppress the nausea that was overtaking you.
Yunseo's eyes widened in alarm. "Do you need a bucket?"
"No, I'm just dramatic."
Your teammates rolled their eyes before Junho smacked the back of your head. "You need to get therapy for this, I'm so serious." He scolded.
The situation at hand felt all too familiar. You couldn’t wrap your head around the fact that you were competing again as a finalist for the floor event. There were only eight gymnasts who qualified for the final round and you placed first in the qualification round a little over a week prior. You were the last gymnast to compete in the event which left you in a puddle of nerves by the time you were warming up and preparing to perform.
Your floor routine was similar to the one you performed during the all-around individual event but your opening combination was different. You had a new skill you had been practicing for the past three years and worked hard to perfect it so you could perform it at the Olympics. You hoped it would be recognized as a new skill and be added to the Code of Points after the Olympics were over. Alongside of dreaming to be an Olympian, you also dreamed of having an official skill named after you.
"You have to lock in immediately, Y/N. Don't let your surroundings distract you or hinder you from putting on your best performance. If you land your opening skill and perform cleanly, you'll end up in first place. I guarantee it." Your coach squeezed your shoulders.
"Don't let us down, Y/N."
Quite honestly, you had been doing a good job pushing away the pressure that loomed over you since you arrived in Tokyo. After the medal ceremony for the all-around event, the initial nerves and pressure you felt disappeared since you got into the swing of things. You were even looking forward to competing but your coach's words sent you spiraling and now you were back to square one.
What did she mean by "us"? Your entire coaching team? Your teammates? Your home country was watching you in anticipation as you prepared to perform on the biggest stage in the world? She could be talking about anybody and everybody and the mere thought made you sick.
With no time to contemplate her words, you forced yourself to walk out onto the floor with a smile on your face. You waved to the audience, who seemed to be cheering louder than ever.
"Representing the Republic of Korea, Y/N Y/L/N."
You positioned yourself in the same corner you always began your routine in and took a final deep breath before waiting for your music to start. Just like always, your body went on autopilot mode as you prepared for your new skill.
You could hear your teammates and coaches screaming as you launched yourself into the air, flipping and turning before landing heavily on your feet with a loud thud. Your arms went up as you straightened yourself out, the opening skill being landed cleanly. You cruised through the rest of the performance with ease, nailing every single skill that was left as they were all ones you were familiar with.
Once you held your ending pose for a few seconds, your body dropped to the ground as your head fell into your hands. You tried to process what happened, unable to believe you cleanly landed a skill nobody else had landed, and performed the rest of your routine flawlessly. You pushed your exhausted body off of the springboard and stood up to acknowledge the audience before joining your coach and teammates.
"Holy shit, Y/N! That was absolutely insane." Sunghyun swept you off of the ground before your feet could even touch the ground from the spring board, spinning you around in a tight hug.
"Put her down, you big oaf." Seojeong smacked his beefy arm. "She just threw herself around in the air and your first instinct is to spin her around? She's going to throw up on you.
Sunghyun listened to his junior and immediately placed you on the ground with a ruffle of your hair. The rest of your teammates surrounded you, taking turns to congratulate you and gushing endlessly about your performance. Your coach barely praised you before the speakers were crackling back to life for your final score.
"Y/N Y/L/N has earned a total score of 15.566."
It wasn't the best score seen at the Olympics but it was much higher than your own personal record. Your mouth fell open as the numbers flashed onto the jumbo screen, unable to believe what your eyes were reading. Your vision was obscured by a body throwing itself against you as you were pulled into a hug for the umpteenth time. You lost count of how many times you were squeezed in a hug but knowing you had a wonderful support system warmed your heart. The past few weeks in Tokyo had been nothing short of grueling so you were thankful that your teammates did whatever they could to support you despite having to focus on their own events.
There was a half-hour break before the medal ceremony and every single second was filled with interviews and photos. You never had so many cameras and microphones shoved into your face in your entire life which made winning an Olympic title more overwhelming. You couldn't process what was happening but the more questions you were asked about how you felt, the bigger the pit in your stomach became.
Before you knew it, you were preparing for the medal ceremony. As the lights in the stadium dimmed, a familiar sense of dread washed over you. You gulped nervously and fiddled around with your fingers while watching members of the Olympic committee set up for the ceremony. You felt the same sickness in your stomach during the medal ceremony for the all-around individual event but chalked it off as being exhausted from practicing extensively. You hoped you would be excited for the floor medal ceremony since you won a medal for your specialty but you were feeling even worse than you did a week ago.
"And the Olympic gold medalist from the Republic of Korea, Y/N Y/L/N!"
Straightening your back with a deep breath, a smile forced its way onto your face as you waved to the cheering crowd. Before you stepped onto the podium, you bowed to the audience and hugged Jade Carey and Rebecca Ferrari, who were the silver and bronze medalists.
You nervously eyed the president of the International Gymnastics Federation as she walked over to you with a big smile on your face. She shook your head before placing the gold medal around your neck, congratulating you for your stellar performance. It felt wrong to accept the medal from her when all you wanted to do was rip it off of your neck and give it to Jade instead.
"Ladies and gentlemen, the 2020 Olympic floor medalists!"
The sight of the Korean flag being raised amidst the American and Italian flags was a sight you never thought you would dread to see. Winning an Olympic title was your dream but at one point did it stop? When did you start hating the sport you dedicated your entire life to?
As you stood on the podium with your hand on your chest as the Korean national anthem heard distantly in your ears, you realized that gymnastics was no longer your passion. The gold medal hanging around your neck felt heavy and it felt as if it tied you to a stone to leave you dropping into the middle of the ocean. Your ears were ringing and your head was spinning, your heart started to beat faster from the overwhelming sensation of being in an undeserving position.
Who were you to claim the Olympic gold medal when you no longer cared for gymnastics? The girls next to you worked equally as hard, perhaps even harder to become an Olympic champion and here you were, preparing to draft your retirement statement rather after returning home. You spent almost the entirety of your life working to make it to the Olympics but with the Olympic title finally in the palm of your hand, you felt nothing short of empty.
Even as you were hugged by your teammates and coaches after the Olympic medal ceremony, you felt empty. A fake smile was pasted on your face during every interview and press conference to hide your conflicted feelings. What would the public say if there was even the slightest hint of displeasure on your face? You would be painted as an ungrateful, undeserving Olympic champion; the last thing you needed was your name dragged through the mud. Millions of people in South Korea rooted, supported, and cheered for you ever since you began to make a name for yourself within the last few years. You were obligated to show your appreciation even if it ate away at you inside.
"You're an Olympic champion again, unnie!" Seojeong squealed, holding your hands as she jumped up and down.
You jumped up and down with her, trying to share her excitement as she rambled about how the two of you would be going home with Olympic medals, a life long dream finally accomplished.
"I'm so happy!" You smiled, squeezing her hands gently. "And I'm so proud of you, Seojeongie. You did amazing."
She smiled, pouting before pulling you into a hug. "I'm proud of you too, unnie. So proud. I know the past couple of years haven't been easy on you but you did amazing. I'm happy and honored that I get to call you my teammate."
Your coach gave you a hug next, swaying you from side to side as she held you tightly. She then pulled away, smiling tearfully at you which shocked you. In the six years you had been training with her, she never once shed a single tear. You didn't know she was capable of showing any emotion beyond stoicism but she had been shocking you constantly since arriving in Tokyo.
"Coach, are you crying?" A bewildered expression broke out on your face as your coach let out a sob.
"Oh my Y/Nie, I can't believe you're a two-time Olympic champion." She wiped the tears off of her face, fanning her face to compose herself. "I know the past few years have been extremely difficult for you but you've done well. I'm so proud of you and there's nobody more deserving to win that title than you."
Guilt once again overtook you, seizing you by the neck with a tight grip. You exhaled deeply in a poor attempt to get your feelings back in check, worried that she would notice your distressed state. You hugged her back with a laugh to mask how you were truly feeling about your Olympic title.
The endless praises and congratulations were only making you feel worse about the entire situation. You weren't sure what was wrong with you and you absolutely hated how you felt but you couldn't shake off the guilt that came with the medal. It felt heavier and heavier by the second.
You were able to walk away from the Olympics with two gold medals but at what cost?
112 notes · View notes
aphroditelovesu · 2 days
Note
May I request a yandere alphabet with Daemon Targaryen?
❝ 🐉 — lady l: It was my first time writing a yandere alphabet so I hope it's ok. Forgive me for any mistakes and I hope you like it! ❤️
❝tw: yandere themes, obsessive and possessive behavior, kidnapping, mention of death, punishments and murder.
❝🐉pairing: yandere!daemon targaryen x gender neutral!reader.
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Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?
Daemon shows his love and affection for his darling through gifts and touches. He's not exactly romantic but he has his moments.
He likes to present you with everything that he finds interesting and that may be of interest to you. It's the most common way for him to show his love, besides touches like a hug, kiss on the forehead or holding your hand.
Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?
Very messy. Daemon has no scruples when it comes to his darling. He will make a huge mess, bodies lying on the street, blood staining everything. Daemon will kill, disembowel, and torture anyone for you.
All for you. He will not feel any kind of remorse.
Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?
Daemon won't exactly be cruel to you because he cares and loves you in his own way. If he gets to the point where he needs to kidnap you, he will try to be as patient as possible.
But patience is not his strong point, so there may be times when he will be cruel. Yelling at you, squeezing your neck and demanding you stop acting like a spoiled child. It's moments like these that he shows his monstrous side.
He may mock you by imitating your voice as a form of mockery, degrading you further.
Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?
Daemon would never force himself on his darling, he would never do something like that. He's a monster, he knows that, but not that kind of monster. He can force you to stay close to him, hugging you and even kissing you hard, but it will never go beyond that.
Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?
Daemon doesn't like being vulnerable and hates appearing weak, so he won't show his heart to his darling much.
There are times when he will be softer and a little vulnerable, but nothing that makes him too uncomfortable, except when he is drunk or needy. In these moments, Daemon will grab you and tell you how much he loves you and how much you mean to him.
Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?
He would find it amusing. Seeing you think you can against him is fun for Daemon. So sweet and so naive. As if you could win against a Targaryen.
Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?
Daemon considers it a game in which he knows he will win in the end. You are the prize he will win at any cost.
He will love watching you try to escape him. Seeing your efforts go in vain, the way you get frustrated when he takes you every time. Adorable.
Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?
The worst thing you could try to do is cheat on him. Daemon will not accept this at all and when he gets his hands on you, you will regret having crossed him.
He can and will physically hurt you. He won't go to the extreme of torturing you, but Daemon will leave marks on your body to remind you that you should never do something like that again. Dietary restrictions and even beatings are among the things he will do.
Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?
Daemon sees himself in a pleasant future with you. With him being King and you at his side, whether as his wife, lover or Hand. He can't see his future without you.
And if he can have children with you, he will.
Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?
Daemon feels very jealous. And he's not subtle about it at all. His gaze is hard and anyone can sense the imminent danger that comes with that feeling.
He takes out his jealousy in the worst way: on you or on others. Depending on the situation, Daemon will leave you full of possessive marks or scattered corpses behind.
He has no problem killing anyone who made him jealous. Was that guard very nice to you? He will die. Was that prostitute giving you looks? Her body was found in poor condition.
Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?
Daemon likes to take you flying with him in Caraxes, going to bars and parties by his side. Always keeping a close eye on you when you are in public, of course.
He's not afraid or embarrassed to show how he feels about you in public and will deal with anyone who says anything about it afterwards.
Daemon tries to be the most compassionate towards you, he doesn't want you to hate him, so he tries to be kind and caring towards you.
Love Letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?
Daemon is definitely not subtle about his intentions with you. He will send gifts, touch you in public and stay by your side. He has no problem showing how he feels about you.
He may try a more subtle approach at first but it won't last. He will make his intentions very clear. Daemon doesn't have the patience to woo you properly.
Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?
No. Daemon has always been this way, reckless, violent and cruel and that has never changed. Everyone already knows the prince and Dameon has never tried to hide who he is.
Naughty: How would they punish their darling?
Daemon can be very cruel with his punishments. He can restrict you from certain needs, such as your food to more superficial things. He has no problem taking it from you, after all, he was the one who gave you such privileges.
In more extreme cases, Daemon can physically harm you, even leaving scars on your body. It all depends on how naughty you were.
Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?
Daemon will not take away your rights unless he thinks you deserve it. If you are good and obedient, he won't need to do something like that.
But if you're not? Daemon will take everything he can from you. Your family, your friends, your basic rights, everything. Until the only thing you have left is him.
Patience: How patient are they with their darling?
Daemon is not an example of patience but he tries for you. He tries his best to be patient with you because he knows it's necessary, that you're scared.
But Daemon can easily lose his temper if you do something he doesn't like or that bothers him. You will have to walk on eggshells around him.
Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?
If you died, Daemon would enter a deep state of grief and sadness. He will become more bitter and cruel than ever, anyone could become the target of the pain he feels for losing you. The countless deaths he caused were a result of losing you. He would never be able to get over your death.
If you escaped or left? No, no. Daemon would burn the world down behind you. He would do anything to find you and he would find you. He has a dragon and he knows his brother would support him in this. It's only a matter of time before he has you in his arms again.
Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?
No. Daemon wouldn't feel guilty about taking you because you're his and there's nothing wrong with taking what's rightfully yours. And he would never let you go, beg and cry all you want, you will never get rid of him.
Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?
Daemon isn't sure what brought out this side of him, maybe he was always like this. But what may have been what brought out his obsessive side was the affection, the love you gave him. You saw him and he loved it.
He found himself wanting more and more of this attention, this love, and he wasn't willing to share it with anyone else.
Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?
Daemon feels bad seeing you cry because he hates seeing your beautiful face stained by tears, especially if he was the one who caused them. But he won't actually do anything to fix it. But he will comfort you, pull you into a hug and whisper sweet nothings in your ear.
He hates it when you yell and if you yell at him, Daemon will put an end to it quickly. Pushing you against a wall and squeezing your throat usually does the trick.
If you try to isolate yourself, he won't let you. You won't stay away from him under any circumstances. You'll have to get used to his presence or things won't end so well for you.
Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?
Burn alive your enemies and/or people who have harmed you in some way as a form of retaliation. And feed them to his dragon.
Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?
Daemon has no apparent weaknesses and he won't even leave them exposed for you to use against him, he's not stupid. But if he trusts you enough, you can use that against him.
Once trust is established, Daemon will be more tolerant of you going out alone, or at the very least with just one guard and not an entire armada, and perhaps letting you wander around his house alone.
Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?
Yes. Daemon doesn't want to hurt you physically, but he will if he sees fit. He will have no problem inflicting pain on you, but don't worry, he will take care of you later.
Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?
Daemon would rather be adored than worship but he adores you in his own way. He worships your body, your mind and how sharp you are. These are qualities that he adores in you.
But you will be put on a pedestal once you accept your role in his life.
Oh, he would go to any lengths to win you. He would compete for your attention in jousts, battles, and any other way to get your attention without having to resort to kidnapping. Something he will do if he sees no other alternative.
Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?
It doesn't take long for him to snap.
Daemon is not patient and he wants you, so he will have you. He may try to win you the traditional way but since that doesn't give the results he wants, Daemon will bring you to him. He will take you.
Maybe a few weeks at most.
Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?
Yes, but not intentionally.
Daemon doesn't want you to be a puppet, a marionette that he will control. He wants to see a fire in your eyes, he likes it when you fight him and if he breaks you he won't have that anymore.
But he can do it accidentally. And Daemon will try everything to bring you back.
He doesn't like it when you're broken, it's not fun for him.
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merakiui · 1 day
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i believe you’ve wrote for stepson!tweels before but what about thoughts for stepson tako? 🥺
Stepson tako....... 👁 👁 tako's master chef card has taught me that he does not know how to cook. T_T he was too spoiled and too busy tasting the yummy food to master the craft....... so naturally, after learning this information, I must discuss a very spoiled stepson Zuzu hehe. <3
Azul who knows he's spoiled and uses that to get whatever he wants from you. It worked when he was little because all it took was a few sniffles and some teary eyes, and you were gathering him in your arms to cheer him up, willing to do everything and anything to get him to smile. Just like his mother, you also adore cooking for Azul and spoiling him rotten with affection. And of course Azul eats it up, loving the way he's doted on so sincerely.
Now that he's older, he can't get away with acting like a baby because it will look very immature and unmannerly. >_< but he can get away with other things. Maybe you're not an octo-mer like him, so Azul gets to slyly wrap a tentacle around your tail fin or waist when he visits home, discreetly feeling you up. This sort of closeness between mers isn't unheard of in the sea, and you're used to this type of hug. Of course it's not so innocent anymore, but you don't need to know that.
Or maybe you're a human... in which case, it's even better because Azul can get away with lots of things. You think it's strange his tentacles seem to slither closer than necessary to certain spots on your body? Don't worry too much. An octo-mer's tentacles have minds of their own. He's just happy to see you! Or when he tricks you into helping him through his breeding season by telling you it's just an annual illness he gets as a mer. >:D
Omg and if you were cooking for him...... no matter how old he gets, you will always be willing to cook a meal for him. But Azul wants you more than the food, and so you'll have to forgive him for being a little spoiled when he takes you against the counter. <3
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starcursedluvrs · 1 day
Text
"TALK"
I suguru x pregnant!reader
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“And I’d be the immediate  Forgiveness  In Eurydice.  Imagine being loved by me.” 
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part I of suguru x pregnant!reader (this isn’t completely canon compliant, and will probs be 3 or 4 parts and will go up to December 24th, 2017 on the current JJK timeline).  
summary: you loved suguru more than anything in this world. and you could argue he felt the same for you. actually, he would end the world for you. so, he took you with him the night he defected, and you happily obliged. however, in the midst of the chaos of leaving your life behind, two little lines appear on a certain test causing you to rethink your entire plan. 
A/N: heyyy!! i'm arden!! this is my first try at ever posting the fanfic I’ve written so please enjoy! I started this specific fic as a hobby back in December, and I finished it a little over a month ago (I’ve just been kinda nervy to post hehe) so here goes nothing! likes, reblogs, and comments are highly appreciated <3
MINORS / AGELESS BLOGS DO NOT INTERACT. YOU WILL BE BLOCKED. 
warnings!: SPOILERS FOR GOJO’S PAST ARC. THIS IS A PREGNANCY FIC! 18+. nsfw. f!reader. suguru and reader are over the age of 18. explicit sexual content. unprotected sex/oral (f!receiving). breeding kink. fingering. creampie. pregnancy. unplanned pregnancy. lactation kink. mentions of child abuse. cute domestic fluff hehe. 
wc: 14.5k
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September 2007 
4:27 PM (16:27)
“Wait…so what are we doing again?” you asked, riding atop one of Suguru’s many curses. You were straddling the pink alien-looking curse, legs dangling off either  side. One of Suguru’s large hands held your waist steady while the other controlled the motion of the cursed spirit. His chin was buried in the crook of your neck, so that he had easy access to press kisses into your skin. 
Suguru left a line of sweet pecks down your shoulder before answering. 
“This village in the sticks was reported to have kidnappings and abnormal deaths. Shouldn’t be anything unusual,” he said nonchalantly. 
You leaned back against him so that you could look up into his honey irises, pouting. His hand left your waist, moving comfortably behind him to support both of your weight. 
“Then why did you ask me to come along? Seems like you could handle it yourself, you’re a special grade. I’m only a semi grade-one,” you reasoned, reaching up to play with his stray bangs. He grabbed your hand before you could reach his neat, inky bun, pressing light kisses into your knuckles. 
“Well, if all goes well, maybe we can find a hotel or do something nice. Charge it to the school and say it took longer than we expected, so we get to stay somewhere overnight without waking Satoru,” Suguru replied, smirking a bit on the last line of his speech. 
“I like the way you think, my love,” you beamed, melting into his touch. 
… 
January 2007 
You and Suguru had been in a committed relationship for the past nine months, and friends for even longer.  You started secretly fucking around at the beginning of your third year at Jujutsu High. You had always been attracted to him, but given your tiny class size and the complexity of Jujutsu Society, you didn’t want to cause any drama or make things weird between you two. 
Well, life doesn’t always go to plan. 
Especially that one night at the beginning of your third year when you, Shoko, Satoru, and Suguru broke into Yaga’s liquor cabinet, stole two bottles of sake, and got a little handsy. With your judgment impaired, you might have let it slip that you thought Suguru was very attractive and often wondered how his sculpted body would feel beneath his Bontan pants and uniform shirt. The thought was reciprocated by the raven head. 
One thing led to another, and the next morning, you woke up in a tangled mess of inky black hair and bedsheets. Suguru just held you, keeping your body close to his, whispering sweet nothings into your ears. It was nice, you did not have to say anything to fill the comfortable silence that had fallen upon you two. 
Eventually, he placed a kiss on your forehead and started to pull his clothes on from the previous night. 
Last night. Was last night a mistake? 
Should you have let Suguru taken you out to dinner or something before he fucked you into tomorrow? 
“Wait…Sug hold on.
What does this mean? 
For us? Our friendship?” you asked in a panic before Suguru reached the door. 
“It doesn’t have to mean anything if you don’t want it to,” he replied in his calm, collected tone, looking at the floor with his back to you. 
“What’s that supposed to mean?” you sat up, still covered by the soft sheets, pulling your knees into your chest, slightly offended. 
“Just that we don’t have to make a big deal out of this if we don’t want to. We also don’t have to do this again if you don’t want to. I know this could complicate things if we keep at it,” he paced around to face you again, the distance still rather daunting.
“Okay.” 
“Cool.”
The comfortable silence from before slowly turned awkward. 
“Um…thanks,” you offer. 
“…for…what?” Suguru inquired. 
“Last night. It was…fun,” you flashed him an unsure smile. 
A deep rumble came from his chest as he chuckled, “Yeah, let’s see how much fun you have walking today. See ya in class,” before leaving the room.
“SUG-“ you called after him, blushing at the cheesy line as he left the room, disappearing back into the cocoon of sheets. 
March, 2007 
You tried to keep your distance from him. Being a child of the Kamo clan, you were probably destined to be forced into some relationship that benefitted Jujutsu society, and not your happiness. This was just one of the many things that you hated about Jujutsu Society. Therefore, Suguru was all that more enticing to you. 
You found yourself perched on Suguru’s desk the next week. Your legs were spread wide, held apart by his large hands to assure you didn’t squirm around too much and get away from him. Suguru was lapping at your folds like a man starved. He dragged his tongue up and down your slit, and worked his way up to your clit, giving it a little kiss and suck. 
“Ngh Suguru. More.” You moaned, bucking your hips up to his face. 
“That’s not how we ask,” he replied, pulling away. 
“Suguru. Please.”
“What happened to complete sentences?” Suguru pressed one of his large thumbs to your nub, holding pressure, but refrained from moving it. 
“Fuck YOU Suguru I-“ 
“That’s what I’m trying to do, doll. You’re just not behaving.” 
He started to swirl his thumb around gently. It wasn’t enough to make you cum, but the pleasure was still intense. 
“Suguru please, I need som-something inside. Fingers. Yours. Please.” You croaked out, your head going dizzy with pleasure. 
“Awww, what’s wrong? Can’t think straight?” He said, plunging his slickened digits, adorned with a few silver rings, right into your core. 
“At least you said please, so I guess I’ll let you cum this time,” Suguru voiced in that smooth, sultry voice of his. 
He started moving those two digits back and forth in a “come here” motion, not giving you a chance to adjust to their circumference. A lewd squelching noise filled the room as he continued his ministrations. “You’re being such a good girl for me, taking my rings and fingers so well. Yeah, you like that, don’t you?” 
You let out a loud moan, and Suguru immediately pushed his thumb in your mouth for you to suck on. That way, you wouldn’t draw attention to any unwelcome visitors who might be walking the halls of the school. 
“You don’t even have to answer with that pretty mouth, your body is answering for you. You’re so tight. Gods, you’re gorgeous.” he whispered into your ear. 
He put his mouth back on your clit to suck, and added a third finger. He kept thrusting it in and out, hitting that sweet spot that had you seeing stars, as if he had your g-spot memorized. 
If Sugru ended up drowning in your juices, he would die a happy man. He absolutely loved lapping up at your sweet pussy, the earthy scent intoxicating to him. 
Soon, you felt the familiar coil in the depths of your belly start to come undone, and your cunt fluttered around Suguru’s fingers, the stimulation becoming too much.
“Come apart f’me. I got you love. I got you. Cum f’me,” Suguru commanded in his pussy-drunk haze. 
You let go as your orgasm washed over you, relishing in the pure bliss as Suguru helped you through the aftershocks. When you came to, he captured your lips in a hungry kiss. You could still taste your essence on his tongue. 
The next night, you were folded over the same desk as he pounded into you with his fat length. The bathroom stalls. The pantry. Behind the bleachers at the field. You could not get enough of each other. 
You and Suguru both fell hard and fast for each other. His unwavering sense of morality, intelligence, and kindness towards others drew you even further into his grasp. The way he spoke, his scent of freshly done laundry, his loyalty to his friends; these were all things that you loved about Suguru Geto. He was one of a kind. 
As Jujutsu Sorcerers, you were well aware that your tomorrow was not guaranteed. Suguru made you feel alive, which, to you, was worth more than any amount of fame or glory that your clan could bestow upon you. He truly wanted to make the world a better place for you, and any future you might have together. On the third month of your official relationship, you confessed your love: 
“Suguruuuu,” you giggled as he kissed up your neck. 
You had been laying in Suguru’s bed, in the midst of a heated makeout session. Your back was pressed flat into the mattress, knees at an angle, and feet flat against the soft duvet. Suguru was positioned right on top of you, in between your knees. He held your face in both of his hands, and your arms clung to the back of his head, getting lost in the inky strands. 
“I love you.” He whispered, as if he was telling a secret. 
In lieu of an answer, you brought his head down into a deep, passionate kiss. Your tongues danced together for what seemed like forever and no time at all, until you broke the kiss and said, “I think I may love you more.” 
“Unfortunately, doll, that’s simply not true. I’d end the world for you.” 
You were hopelessly in love with Suguru Geto.    
May 2007 
“You have a list of baby names picked out? Dude you’ve been together for like a few months.” Shoko taunted, a cigarette tucked between her lips, clicking away on her silver flip phone. 
“Oh, come on Ieiri, I think every person has a baby name list.”
“I don’t.” Shoko deadpanned. 
“You’re a lesbian who has no desire for kids,” you shot back.
“Touché. I do have a cat name list, though, if that counts,” Shoko added.
“I think it does.” you replied. 
“Ugh, fineee, gimme the list,” said Shoko, already grabbing the journal out of your hand. After scanning through the list of names, Shoko looked up at you and burst into laughter.
“Ok, you cannot name your kid Shigure. Or Kyo. Or any character from Fruits Bask-“
“Yo, WHO’S having a kid” interrupted the lanky, white-haired person with blacked-out sunglasses and a mischievous smile. Suguru appeared next to Satoru, holding a basketball, running to kiss you hello. 
“NO ONE’S having a kid,” you replied. 
“Ok, wait I need to know, do either of you have baby name lists? I feel like every person has them.” 
Satoru sighed, and thought about the question for a second. Suguru sat on the ground and started rolling the basketball in the dirt. 
“I haven’t even thought about baby names. To be honest, kids are kinda hard to have when you’re a sorcerer. You have to go on missions and then come home and change diapers, no thanks. Like, what if it poops on you? Also, I kinda wanna spite the old geezers in my clan.” Satoru added.
“You raise an excellent point, Gojo. This is one of the reasons why I love being a lesbian. Less of a risk for accidents,” Shoko took a drag from her cigarette.
“I can’t be the ONLY person here who has a list,” you sighed. 
“Lemme see that-“ Satoru said as he grabbed your journal from Shoko’s grasp. 
“…These are just Fruits Basket and One Piece charact-” Satoru snickered. 
“Wait Satoru, have you read the new One Piece chapter yet? I heard it’s crazy.” Suguru cut in. 
“Oh, no not yet, I haven’t had a chance to get the new volume,” Satoru whined. 
“What are you doing right now? Wanna go pick up some coke from the vending machine, then get to that bookstore in Shinjuku and grab a copy?” Suguru explained with excitement. 
“Honestly, a coke sounds amazing right now. Either of you wanna come?” Satoru gestured to you and Shoko. 
“Nah, I think we’re gonna go steal some of Yaga’s booze,” Shoko informed. 
“Yeah, he’s on a mission for the next day or so. Might as well take advantage of it,” You said, a little defeated and disinterested. 
“…’kay see you guys later then.” Satoru said in a sing-songy voice. 
Suguru walked up to you, pressed a quick peck on your lips, and said, “I’ll be back. Love you.” 
But that wasn’t all.
Under his breath, so that no one else could hear, he whispered, “Don’t think this conversation is over yet, doll,” and walked away as if he hadn’t uttered anything. Your stomach was filled with butterflies and you felt your cheeks go hot as he walked away. 
… 
Later the same day, May, 2007
You were sitting on Suguru’s lap as he twiddled on his PS3 controller playing one of his games. Suguru was sitting on the floor, his legs criss-crossed while you leaned against his back, feeling his warmth though his clothing. You were sporting one of his large white t-shirts, wearing only your favorite pair of panties underneath. 
“Sug?” You question softly, turning around to face him. 
“Yeah, doll?” He replied not looking down from his game. 
“So…about that comment earlier. Why did you say the conversation wasn’t finished yet? And which one? About the One Piece chapter? Or the baby names? I hope I didn’t make you uncomfortable asking that question, I was ju-“
Suguru paused his game and looked at you, a smirk on his face. 
“It did the opposite of making me uncomfortable, actually. It made me feel a little more normal, or as normal as we can be given our lifestyle. I have a baby name list too.” 
Your heart fluttered. Of course he did. 
“I saw the list over Satoru’s shoulder. And we actually had one name in common.”
“Which name?” 
“Riko.” He replied softly.
His answer made you happy and sad all at once. You wish you didn’t have that name on your list. Riko Amanai had meant so much to the both of you. She represented the freedom that you could have from Jujutsu Society, as well as everything that was broken and corrupt about it. Riko’s death is what radicalized the both of you. She set you both on a path to work towards a better world. 
For a moment, you thought about what your life would be with Suguru had you not been Jujutsu Sorcerers. You would probably get married as soon as you graduated, get a job somewhere. Buy a cozy house in the countryside. Make home cooked meals, have children, adopt some dogs. You would grow old together and not have to constantly worry about the fact that you could die a gruesome death in the morning. 
You were lying down on your side now, your back against Suguru’s chest. Suguru moved a hand under your shirt, to your stomach, slowly rubbing circles, drawing you out of your trance. 
“I love your tummy, it’s so cute” Suguru sighed into your ear. 
You giggled.
“What’s so funny about that, love?”
“I’m sorry that just sounded so funny in the moment.” 
“I don’t think it’s that funny, especially when my baby’s gonna be in there one day.”
He said it so nonchalantly and matter-of-factly that you thought you had misheard him. You blushed, hoping you didn’t mishear. 
“SUG-“ you turned around and gave a playful slap to his arm. 
After a pause of giggling from the both of you, Suguru just couldn’t let the topic get away from you. 
“Ya know, I think about it a lot,” he continued. 
“Think about what,” you questioned.
“Think about what our future would be like. A house that is actually full of love. And little feet running around.” 
“Tell me more,” you said against his lips. 
“Maybe we’d live in a really remote village away from everything Jujutsu related. We could get a little farm, raise some sheep, horses, chickens, crops. We could add to the world instead of just taking.” 
“Why do we have to wait for the future to do that? Money isn’t the issue here,” You answered, referring to the handsome compensation you receive for such a risky career path. 
“True, I could just fuck a baby into you right now.” 
“I was talking about the house, and you knew that.” You shot back, a laugh escaping your chest at an attempt to be serious. 
“That’s another thing I think about.” 
“What?” You were taunting him now. You wanted to see where this was going.
“You, your tummy all round with my baby. God, you look so good when you’re stuffed full f’me,” Suguru slurred. From the dim light of his paused video game, you could see that his pupils were blown with lust. He kissed you hard and messily, tongue intertwining with yours.
Suguru removed your (his) shirt and started to kiss down your body, landing at your breasts, hovering right over a nipple. 
“These would look so good with milk. So pretty and soft,” he purred, taking a nipple into his mouth. 
The warmth of his mouth felt so good against your pebbled nipples, you couldn’t help but let out a moan. He licked and sucked until you were a drooling, wet mess underneath him. 
“You like this, huh. Baby, I’ve barely touched you. And you’re already this worked up?” He taunted, moving to give attention to the neglected nipple. 
“What else?” you slurred, ignoring his question. He still hadn’t admitted it.
“Everyone would know who you belonged to. All because of me.” He continued, releasing the nipple from his mouth. 
His words sent shivers down your spine, and you felt your arousal start to pool uncomfortably in your underwear. You needed them off. 
“Suguru, what do you want?” you asked the obvious question, just wanting to hear him speak more on the topic. 
“I wanna stuff your pretty cunt full of cum ‘till you can’t take any more, doll,” he grumbled, grinding his impressive erection on your clothed cunt. 
“Wanna get you pregnant so bad,” he continued pressing feverish kisses down the length of your body. “You’ve been asking a lot of questions about what I want.” He made his way to your panties, “But, before I take these off, I need to know what you want.”
Your hole was clenching around nothing at his words, you were getting rather impatient. 
“Please touch me.” You whined. 
“Hmm, I have been touching you my love,” 
“Sugu- stop t-teasin-nghhh.” you moaned as one of his thick fingers started moving in a circular motion on your bud. Soon, one finger became two, and he moved them from your clit to your slick folds, swirling the juices around, occasionally ghosting your eager cunt. 
“Suguru gimme your dick,” you begged. 
“Baby, one, you can ask nicer than that, where are your manners? And two, I have to get you ready to take me first. Gotta make sure I can fit the most amount of cum in there as possible,” he let out a small moan on the last word. 
“Open your mouth, doll,” he commanded. 
You complied, opening your mouth as he stuck his two slickened fingers in, pushing them as far back as they could go. Out of the corner of your eye, you could see a dark stain forming on his gray sweatpants. He must have been impossibly hard. 
Your moans and gasps vibrated against his digits, and when he thought you had been teased enough, he finally offered you the sweet relief of his fingers filling you. Definitely not as large as his cock, but they reached the parts of you that you could not with your own hands. Suguru started thrusting in and out, curling his fingers along the way, hitting your g-spot with brutal precision.
“Sug-nghhh, I’m gonna-” 
“Shhh baby, you can let go for me, I got you. So good f’me.” 
With the thumb of his hand, he lightly stroked your clit, and you felt the familiar heat bubbling in your core. After a few more thrusts, and praises from Suguru, you were cumming all over his fingers. He helped you through your orgasm, your head full of wool as you came down from your high. Suguru brought his drenched appendages to his mouth and sucked, cleaning your fluids from his fingers.
“If only curses tasted this good. I can’t get enough of you.”
In your post-orgasm clarity, you realized that your boyfriend was still clothed. That wouldn’t do. You sit up, rummaging through sticky sweats and underwear to pull his dick out. A long strand of precum dripped from his tip, breaking away as you pulled him out of his boxers. His penis would never fail to surprise you; he was of average length, but so thick, you could barely close your hand around him. You wrapped two hands around his cock as your mouth watered at the beautiful sight before you. But, just as you were about to taste him, two of his strong hands pushed you back against the bed, forcing you off of his dick. 
“What was that for? I wanna suck you off,” you pouted.
“Sorry, doll. We can’t waste any cum,” he said as his nose ghosted against yours. 
“But I just wanted to make sure, you never said it out loud. Do you actually want this? Can I actually get you pregnant? Don’t wanna pressure you if it was just a kink.” He looked into your eyes with concern, needing your verbal confirmation to continue. 
“Suguru. Put a baby in me.” 
You think you broke your boyfriend after saying that. He let out a grunt from deep within his chest and grabbed a pillow from the pile that fell off the bed in during your earlier activities. He placed the pillow underneath your lower back and whispered choruses of “I love you,” on your skin. Suguru’s fingertips traced over your skin, eventually grasping your legs, throwing them over his shoulders. 
“I don’t deserve you, doll.” He pressed a quick kiss to your nose. 
“This is called a mating press,” Suguru explained as he grabbed his cock and lined up with your twitching hole. “I did some research as to what position would get you pregnant the fastest, and I think this one has a good success rate.”  He sounded so methodical in his explanation, which was so in character for him. Of course your Suguru would do research into this. He would do anything for you to make you happy. And you would do the same for him. 
When he pushes the head in, you both gasp at the contact. He kept sliding in until his balls slapped against your ass and your pelvic bones met. There was such little resistance, and you let out a sob as he bottomed out. 
“You ok, baby? You’re taking me like such a-a, nghhh- good girl. Feels like heaven in your pussy. My pussy.” It was so attractive when he got possessive over you, your ovaries felt like they were about to burst in more ways than one. 
“Sugu- ngh- move-“ 
Instead of moving, he licked the inside of your upper thigh, dragging his tongue impossibly slow to tease you. 
“NGH- plea-ahhh please,” you could feel tears pricking in the corner of your eyes. He made it so easy for you to fall apart. 
“Good girl, look at you using your words,” he sounded wrecked, his voice gravely with arousal. And with that, he began moving. At first, his thrusts were slow and deep; you could feel every vein and ridge on his dick. His balls slapped against the fat of your ass, creating an embarrassingly loud clapping sound that bounced off of the walls. It felt delicious. 
You weren’t just having sex - he was making love to you. It was emotional and sensual. The tears you felt earlier spilled over on to your cheeks as Suguru picked up the pace, his cock pistoning in and out. He kissed your tears away as you muttered broken moans of both his name and explicits. 
Suguru’s grip was surely going to leave bruises in the morning. One hand was holding your body in place around your waist, while the other kept your leg over his shoulder. He let go of your leg for a moment as he grabbed another pillow that was somewhere in reach, and gently slid it under your hips so that he could reach you at a deeper angle. Your vision went blurry. He was impossibly deep, you thought you could feel him rearranging your intestines. 
Finally, his thrusts started getting sloppier. You knew Suguru was close. 
“Gonna fuck my baby into you,” he half moaned. “Fuck, love, I’m close. Want ya to let go first,” and with that, he moved his possessive, bruising touch to rub your clit. After a few rotations around your nub, you let go, your vision going white as you came hard, your cunt clamping down on his cock.
The vice grip of your pussy is what finally sent him over the edge, and Suguru began to fill you up with his thick load. 
“Thank you, baby, thank you,” Suguru chanted, like it was a prayer, and you were the goddess who was receiving his offering. You laid like that for a while, him still inside, your hips tilted up to keep his cum inside of you. He left a trail of kisses down your sweat-drenched neck as his cock softened in your walls. 
After about fifteen minutes, you felt Suguru starting to fill out again, his body gearing up for round two. 
And then three.
And then four. 
You lost count of how many times you had cum that night. Your tummy sported a small bump with the amount of Suguru’s seed trapped in your womb. You were so full that you couldn’t possibly take any more. And Suguru loved you like that. 
Of course, he loved you always, but this was different. He took one of his large hands and gently massaged your sore, slightly swollen belly, pressing wet kisses all around. 
“I hope our baby looks like you,” you whispered into the crown of his head. 
“I was just thinking the same thing. I hope our baby at least has your eyes. I get lost in them sometimes,” he responded. “Ya know, your eyes are probably my favorite part of you, besides your tummy. And your beautiful brain. And every other part of you.” 
“I love you so much, Suguru. I don’t think I can put it into words. You’re such a good man, so good to me. You’re gonna be the best dad one day,” you confessed.
“Hopefully, that day will be soon,” he smirked, “I’m gonna go get you water and a hot washcloth to clean you up. Want anything to eat?” 
You smiled back at him and shook your head, blowing a kiss to him before he left. 
You expected yourself to be more freaked out by his comment, “hopefully, that day will be soon,” but you couldn’t help but feel excited. Life as a Jujutsu Sorcerer was so unexpected, you never knew when a mission was going to be your last. You decided it wouldn’t be a bad thing to have a little mini Suguru running around, allowing the three of you to finally have the family that neither you nor Suguru ever did. 
… 
August 2007
It was a disgustingly hot day outside. You were so sweaty, you felt your clothes sticking to you, and the humidity felt as if you were walking through a sauna. 
Since it was so unbearably hot outside, you and Suguru decided it would be a nice day to go to a water park. Of course, that meant Satoru and Shoko had to tag along. 
You and Suguru were in charge of packing, as the other two would not have chosen enough food or towels for your journey. They would probably also forget things like sunscreen and umbrellas, opting to fill your beach bags with bottles of booze and sweets. You and Suguru were practically the parents of the friend group at this point; sometimes the other two would even refer to you as “mom and dad.” Suguru would give you a smirk any time this happened, reminding you of the conversation you had back in May. 
After you fought Satoru on the fact that he could not in fact take an entire box of ice cream mochi to the water park, you were set to leave on your adventure. The four of you and your bags all piled in the car of an assistant director. Excitement and easy conversation flowed through the vehicle, as all of you relished in the relief of the cool air conditioning. 
Shoko sat in the front, smoking a cigarette, choosing which CDs to play, while you sat in the back with Satoru and Suguru. Suguru, being the gentleman that he is, gave you the seat behind the driver’s side. You tried to resist, explaining that he and Satoru would have more leg room if you just sat in the middle, but Suguru insisted. 
The four of you finally arrived at the water park about an hour and a half later. 
Maybe this was a bad idea. 
As you walked through the wooden gates, the park was swarmed with families, teenagers, and college students. There were colorful slides entangled in each other at the center of the park, with a lazy river surrounding it. To the left, there was a wave pool with people attempting to surf, and to the right, there was another large pool with buckets of water that would dump on patrons randomly. The lounge chairs were spread throughout the park, and it seemed like the entirety of Japan had come to this one water park to beat the summer heat. 
“Ok guys let’s stay together and try to find some lounge chai-” 
“Shoko! I’m gonna beat you down those slides, ready?” Satoru screamed with glee, like a young child. 
“Hold on, lemme finish this,” Shoko replied, motioning to her cigarette. 
“NO! We. Are. Going. To. Sit. Down. Let’s just stay together, it’s a madhouse here,” You put your foot down. 
“If I wanted to be mothered, mother, I would have gone home for the summer,” Shoko rolled her eyes at you. You just ignored her, too bothered by the heat to even come up with a good comeback.
“I sent out a curse to go find us a spot - wait. Where’s Satoru?” Suguru chimed in.
“Let’s be logical about this. Where is the nearest ice cream stand?” You asked. 
“Ha, there he is,” Shoko nodded her head towards the nearest ice cream stand. In the line of children, there was one with white hair who was almost as tall as the stand itself. Bingo. 
You marched over to the line, and went to tug Satoru by his ear back to the group. Alas, his Infinity was on, and you could not touch him. 
“Oof, I would not wanna be him right now, that one has a temper,” Shoko joked, as she put her cigarette out over the trash can next to them, watching you and Satoru argue. In that moment, Suguru couldn’t help but stare at you, taking in how beautiful you looked against the summer sun. You were glowing, radiant, even as you berated his best friend. 
“I haven’t seen you look at someone the way you look at her.” Shoko broke Suguru’s thoughts, pulling him out of his trance. 
“Yeah.” Suguru responded, smiling. 
“Wow, you didn’t even try to deny it,” Shoko smirked back. “OOooo someone’s in looovee,” Shoko teased. 
“I am. And I’m so lucky. I love her more than anything in the world,” Suguru said with a content sigh. 
“Ok, now you’re just gonna make me vomit, that’s so sappy,” Shoko stuck out her tongue, making a fake gagging sound. 
“It’s true,” Suguru responded, still in his trance.
“What if I can treat her better than you,” Shoko teased. 
“Maybe,” he said, the slightest flicker of insecurity in his eyes. “I don’t think I deserve her sometimes. She’s not as tainted by curses and cursed energy as I am. She’s not the one who absorbs curses day after day.” He looked tired. Shoko noticed the bags under his eyes, but just as she was about to say something, you came running with Satoru’s wrist in your hand, pulling him with an ice cream cone in his hand. The ice cream was beginning to drip everywhere.
“I can’t believe they only had vanilla. What a ripoff,” Satoru sighed, annoyed. 
“You dumbass, you didn’t even get napkins!? How am I supposed to call you a functioning adult, you’re literally about to turn 19, and you didn’t even get napkins?!” You berated him again.
“Oh, looks like the curse found a place for us to sit. It’s keeping the area clear so non-sorcerers aren’t determined to sit there,” Suguru interrupted. 
You all walked towards a little spot in the shade with three lounge chairs and a table. You figured you would just share your lounge chair with Suguru and sit in his lap. Or he could use your lap as a pillow and you could braid his hair. Either worked. 
Just as you were setting out your towels on the chairs, you heard a PLOP and crying following after. A little kid had slipped and fallen down on the concrete. He used his hands to break the fall, and the skin of his palms were broken a little bit, blood splintering through the cracks. He started hysterically crying.
“Oh no, sweetie! Are you okay? Where is your grown up?” you rushed over to the kid. 
“I think I packed a first aid kit in the bag, let me get it,” Suguru added.
Of course he did, that man was prepared for the end of the world.
Suguru took an antiseptic wipe from the kit, and bent down so that he was at eye level with the kid. 
“This is probably going to sting, but it will feel better I promise. Your bathing suit is dope by the way, I love the colors,” Suguru cooed at the kid, trying to calm him down. 
“You remind me a lot of my little brother, his name is Noritoshi. He’s really brave. Are you brave like him?” you added. 
The child stopped his hysterics and let Suguru clean him up, listening to both of your kind words. He nodded his little head of pink hair at your question and pointed towards an elderly man slowly, but frantically making his way over to the kid.
“Yuji! What happened?” the old man asked.
“I falled and getted a boo-boo,” the kid, called Yuji, sniffled. 
“He slipped and hurt his hand, we have some antiseptic disinfectant and bandaids though, so we fixed him right up,” you told the man as he got closer.
“He was really brave,” Suguru added, smiling down at Yuji. 
“Thank you, so much. You two are very kind,” the man said in a monotone voice. Though his voice showed no emotion, his eyes did. His eyes looked tired, but definitely grateful to the kindness of you and Suguru. 
“Feel better, dude!” Suguru yelled to Yuji as his grandfather led him away. 
After about an hour of tanning on the lounges with Shoko, you looked to see where the boys went. It wasn’t very hard to spot the two best friends, as they were acting like children, making big waves in the lazy river. On Suguru’s shoulders, you noticed something: the kid with the pink hair from earlier. 
Suguru and Satoru were having some sort of chicken fight with him, all three of them laughing and having the time of their lives. 
“You are hopeless,” Shoko rolled her eyes, a new cigarette in between her lips. 
“What do you mean?” You replied. 
“Don’t play dumb, I know what you’re thinking,” she smirked back.
September 2007 
“Suguru, you look like you’ve lost weight, are you okay?” Satoru asked, as he twirled a pencil in midair with his Infinity technique. 
“Just tired,” Suguru responded. 
Over the past few weeks, Suguru had developed dark circles and bags under his eyes. He looked pale, and was often exhausted. Not too exhausted for you though, apparently. 
It seemed the two of you spent more and more time together holed up in one of your rooms when you weren’t on missions. It was just so nice in your own little world, away from everything. You didn’t have to care about who lived and who died. You only had to focus on each other. 
Satoru attempted to carry on the conversation. 
“I feel like I haven’t seen you in forever.” 
“You probably won’t see me for a while again.” 
“Yo, what’s that supposed to mean?” 
“I need to get out of here. Both of us do. We’re not fit for Jujutsu Society.” Suguru said, referring to the two of you. 
“Ha, ha, so funny.” Satoru sarcastically added. 
“It’s not a joke.” 
“What do you mean? Dude, you’re a special grade, you seriously think they’re gonna let you quit?” 
It was true. The elders wouldn’t just let Suguru run away and walk free. If he was not with Jujutsu society, he was probably against it. And letting a special grade sorcerer and his grade one partner roam free would pose a threat to the stability of the elder’s iron grip on the status quo of Jujutsu society. 
He’d have to get the elders to denounce and force you out. 
So, here you were, flying with the man who was your boyfriend, your one and only, on the back of a curse, headed out for a mission, and hopefully, some much needed seclusion with Suguru. 
… 
7:03 PM (19:03)
You and Suguru decided to split up for the mission. It had been reported that there was a sighting of two possible curse users and a separate cursed spirit. Thus, Suguru wanted to deal with the curse users, and you to deal with the curse itself. 
You exorcized the curse with ease, using piercing blood to slice the monster in half. There were a few other lower level curses, which you could have eliminated with your eyes closed. It seemed too easy. If Suguru was sent on this mission, there had to be something else, another factor. After a few minutes of patrolling for any other cursed energy residue, you decided to find your way back to Suguru. 
You found him standing outside of a small house on the outskirts of the village. He seemed out of it; he was staring right at the door, but did not enter. As you approached, you saw the strong cursed energy residue leading from the door. 
“Sug, I exorcized those curses. I know you hate the taste of swallowing them, I didn’t want to make you do that if you didn’t have to.” If Suguru heard you, he showed no acknowledgement. 
“Suguru?” You pinched the sleeve of his white collared shirt.
“Dude? Did you hear me?” You squeezed his thick bicep, pushing your manicured nails into his skin, effectively bringing him back from whatever plane of reality he was on. 
“The locals in the village told me this is the home of two little girls, twins. Their descriptions match the ones for the curse users. So…” He insinuated, leaving the rest for you to figure out. His amber eyes were dark and cold. 
“Oh.” You said. You and Suguru had both been through a lot and hated Jujutsu Society. You and Suguru had your incident with Amanai a little over a year earlier, and your uppity clan kept you from your mother, a heartbreaking decision by the family head in order to give you the best possible chance of becoming the leader of the clan. A position which you despised.
Over the past few months, in the afterglow of sex, you two would lay there, embraced in each other's arms, dreaming of a world without curses, without clans, without people to produce those curses. “Monkeys,” as Suguru referred to non-sorcerers, from which curses were created. In your and Suguru’s fantasy world, you wouldn’t even have a reason to use curse techniques. You could get married, have children, live a peaceful life without fear of a curse coming to take that happiness away.
The bottom line is you knew Jujutsu Society was unfair, but never would you think you would be asked to harm a child. What was wrong with these people? You thought of your little brother, Norotoshi, who was also six years old. He was supposed to be your “competition” for the title of family head, but you never really wanted to fight him. He was just your sweet little brother. 
How could you harm someone that is the same age as your little brother? 
A wave of nausea ran through your body as the reality of the situation dawned upon you. Suguru kneeled down on the floor with you, rubbing your back and holding your hair back as you vomited. 
“Shhh, I got you.” He wrapped you in an awkward embrace on the floor, and pressed a kiss to your sweat-sheened forehead. “It’s going to be okay. I have a plan.” Suguru’s entire demeanor changed in an instant. He smiled, but there was no emotion behind his eyes, and his voice sounded like it was coated in honey. 
His behavior was strange, but helped you to feel more at ease. Suguru gave you some hope to cling on to. 
… 
8:46 PM (20:46) 
You were both sitting on the stairs leading up to the front of the house. You were leaning on Suguru as he brushed a hand over your hair, occasionally placing a kiss on the top of your head. You had finally finished sobbing into Suguru’s chest after an hour, the teardrops staining through his white collared shirt. You felt so many emotions. Anger at the broken system. Hatred, for the Jujutsu Society elders. Confusion, for what would happen once you committed to your plan. Grief, for the people in your life that you would lose. Betrayal, from the society that was supposed to protect people. Suguru sat with you and validated your feelings, making you feel like you and your emotions were the only things in this world that matter. 
The plan was simple. You were both going to defect. 
Both you and Suguru were sick and tired of the way the world functioned. You were sick of watching comrades, comrades who were teenagers, who were children, die. 
During one of your late night conversations, Suguru once said, 
“If being a Jujutsu Sorcerer is like running a marathon…
What if what’s at the end of that road…
Is a mountain of our fellow sorcerers’ dead corpses.”
In that moment, Suguru had played it off as some dark joke, but part of you knew that he was right. 
As for the plan, you two were to wait until some of the elders of the village led you into the small house, as they apparently kept multiple locks on it to keep the supposed dangerous young girls at bay. Then, you were going to take the young sorcerers on the back of one of Suguru’s curses and run to Kyoto and find somewhere to stay for the night. Suguru said he would “take care of the rest.” You trusted him with your whole being, even if that meant him ending the lives of a few non-sorcerers. It would serve them right for causing the very existence of curses. 
9:01 PM (21:01)
The two elders from the village arrived shortly after. You took Suguru’s hand and shared a reassuring glance, his thumb rubbing gently over your hand as if to say, it’s going to be okay. Shaking with exhaustion, anxiety, and some of the nausea from earlier,  you slowly made your way up the stairs as the elders parted the shoji doors. The building seemed to be one long room with some sort of wooden cage at the end, almost like the house was made to hold animals at some point. 
The building was dimly lit, but you could see the outline of two small figures huddled together in the center of the wooden cage. Your stomach turned once again, and you tightly squeezed Suguru’s hand.
“What is this?” Suguru firmly questioned, his free hand going up to brush his bangs away. 
The two of you stepped closer to the makeshift prison, and the two small figures were shaking. As you made your way towards the children, they had obviously been beaten. They were covered in dry blood, scratches and bruises. They both had one black eye. 
How could these children, these SIX year olds, legally be kept like this? THESE were the scary curse users that were terrorizing this village? It was disgusting. 
“My grandchild was on the verge of death because of these two,” spit the woman who led you in.
“These two use strange powers and often attack the villagers.” defended the other man in your presence.
Suguru dropped your hand and squatted down to be at eye level with the girls, pinching his nose bridge between his pointer finger and thumb. 
“So you mean to tell me that you monkeys think that these little girls, these children are responsible for the incidents that have been occuring, is that correct?” Suguru grumbled, his voice icy and dangerous. 
“I already dealt with the cause of the incidents, they’re innocent children, what is wrong with you people,” you cried. You were full of rage, tears threatening to spill from your eyes. 
One of the young girls, clutching a well-loved stuffed animal, bravely spoke up and declared, “We didn’t mean to hurt anyone on purpose, they were trying to-”
“SHUT UP YOU MONSTERS!” The elder woman screamed. 
“Your parents were the same. I knew we should have killed you when you were born,” the man added. 
“Exactly, twins are bad luck. We should have known better,” the elder woman snorted. 
Suguru looked down at the girls and whispered something that would not have been obvious to someone who did not know him as well as you did, “It’ll be okay.”
He started drawing a curse from his arsenal of cursed spirits, and gave you a nod. The signal to go ahead with the plan. 
That same silky smooth, almost frighteningly nice, voice that Suguru only used when he was especially angry. 
“Let’s step outside for a second, shall we?” Suguru tutted, producing the same pink cursed spirit you flew on to get to the village. He walked out the door with the two older adults and shot you a glance. 
I’d end the world for you. 
It was the same expression he bore when you confessed your love for each other, all of those months ago. 
The girls immediately stood up when they sighted the curse. They were terrified, understandably so. You moved towards the thick metal lock of the wooden cage and knelt down.
“Hey girls, I’m not going to hurt you, I’m here to help. You’re safe. I know it must seem so scary right now, but me and the other man you saw me with are going to get you out of here.”
You told them your name, and assured them that you were like them. Using your piercing blood to cut through the thick lock, you explained to them about your technique and talked to them about your little brother to keep them (and yourself) calm. 
As soon as the lock broke, the girls ran to you and hugged you tightly. They were shaking, crying, and clinging to your body. A series of thank you’s flooded from their mouths, and you kissed the top of their heads, attempting to dry their tears away. 
“The pink curse over here is going to take us to safety. Suguru, that man who’s talking to them, is also a sorcerer, and he’ll meet us wherever we get to.” you explained. 
You sat the girls on the curse side by side, and then climbed in back of them to make sure they did not fall. Using Supernova, you blasted a hole through the roof, and the cursed spirit started to levitate off of the ground. Quickly, you gained altitude and left the village behind. You covered the girls eyes as you looked back, just to see what was happening. The entrance to the house was ablaze and you could make out Suguru’s cursed spirits crawling throughout the village. 
Shit. Well, there wasn’t any turning back now. 
… 
The Next Morning
Overnight, you had flown the girls to a small hostel on the outskirts of Osaka. You purchased a small, private room for the three of you to stay in. 
As the sky turned from a deep purple to a ombré of orange and blue, nausea from the previous evening returned in full force. You held yourself over the toilet as you threw up what felt like your entire gut. You stayed like that until you heard four small feet walk into the bathroom behind you. 
With the light properly shining on them, you got to see how truly filthy they were. The girl, who called herself Mimiko, had short brown hair that was knotted, matted, and crinkled with dry blood. Her sister, Nanako, was not faring much better. Her blonde curls were also matted, and there was crusted blood left on her forehead. They both were covered from head to toe in bruises, had dark circles around their eyes, and seemed to be alarmingly skinny. 
“Um… are you okay?” Nanako asked. You took a deep breath, happy to focus on something other than your churning stomach for a moment. 
“Yeah, I’ll be fine. I think it’s just nerves.” You answered. 
“Let’s worry about you two, I’ll run you a bath, then we can go to the 7/11 across the way and pick up some food. Sound good?” You declared. 
Mimiko’s stomach rumbled. “I think your belly answered for you, Mimiko,” you chuckled softly. 
… 
While the girls bathed, you went down to the Lost and Found of the hostel and grabbed a few items that looked like they would fit the twins: some hoodies, leggings, and a skirt. You also fixed yourself up, washing the vomit out of your mouth and splashing your face with hot water from the sink. 
Once the girls looked decent enough to go outside without raising suspicion, the three of you ventured out to the 7/11 across the street. 
The smell of food was a welcome scent as you walked up and down the rows of food, snacks, and other items. You grabbed whatever you thought a few six year olds would like, and on your way to the cashier, something caught your eye. A row of 100 yen pregnancy tests and other feminine care products. Whether it be a metaphorical gut feeling or the actual nausea that had persisted for the last few days, something told you to purchase a stick to pee on, just in case.You snuck the test into the pile of items you and the girls were purchasing. 
When the three of you got to the hostel, the girls scarfed their food down, and you tried to take little nibbles and sips of water. You put the twins down for a nap. 
You tried your best not to think about Suguru. You didn’t know what to think of him anymore. The man you spoke to the previous night could not have been your boyfriend. The Suguru you knew would never kill without a point. He would never just murder an entire village of people. 
You hoped and prayed that you were wrong. That he didn’t actually harm anyone and just showed off his curses to teach the people of the village a lesson.
Wait.
What if he was killed? 
It was all so confusing. You loved Suguru. He’s the one person who seemed to have love for you, besides your younger brother. 
Noritoshi. A pang of guilt wracked through your frame, heightening the gurgling of your stomach. 
If he murdered those non-sorcerers…you would have been deemed an accomplice. 
 So…
What would he think? 
Your baby brother?
Would he be okay? 
He’s a boy with an inherited technique in the Kamo clan. But would people look out for him? Would they keep him from your mother as well? 
In your spiral of thoughts, you noticed the 7/11 bag on the counter and remembered the supplies you bought earlier that day. You grabbed it as quietly as possible, as to not wake the girls, and stepped into the bathroom, clutching the goods inside. Your hands were shaking from lack of food over the past day and a half, but as carefully as you could, you retrieved the pregnancy test from the bag. 
The box was small, but felt so heavy in your hand. 
Why not? It probably won’t be positive, you told yourself. 
Why do I have to convince myself it won’t be positive, you thought. 
You know what, it will get my brain off of Noritoshi and Suguru for a bit, you reasoned, pulling apart the tucked in top of the box. 
After you fully unwrapped it, you read the directions, and followed suit. You put the test in the cup on the sink of the bathroom, and walked out to see the clock in the room. You waited five minutes until the results developed. 
Wait…this was probably a bad idea.
What were you thinking? 
This was so stupid why would you go and do this in the first place? 
You needed to get some air, your chest felt tight. You felt the nausea creeping back again. 
Suguru, where are you? 
You grabbed a room key off of the counter and slowly walked out into the hallway, desperately trying to keep yourself from waking the girls. One of the first things that caught your eye in the hallway was a vending machine. 
Maybe some soda would help settle your stomach? 
You walked over to the machine and plucked a few coins from your pocket, listening to them clink through the slot. You selected a Ginger Ale and Coke, reasoning that if you didn’t drink it, Suguru would when he got back.
If he got back. 
No. You can’t think like that. 
You took as long as you could getting back to the room, stepping on every other square of the carpeted floors, trying to ground yourself back to reality somehow. You arrived at the door a few minutes later and opened the door. 
The windows in your room were wide open, allowing a little breeze to blow the curtains. You dropped both bottles of soda. 
You had locked the windows before leaving the room. You made sure of it. 
You panicked, running for the girls to make sure they were okay. Alas, they were sleeping soundly, no new scratches or blood on them. 
You turned your attention to the bathroom, where the door was closed and you heard some rustling. 
Slowly making your way towards the door, you lined up your piercing blood technique, in case you were about to be attacked. 
“Baby, is that you?” you heard from the other side of the door. 
“Suguru.” You didn’t know if you should be more frightened or relieved. 
Part of you wanted nothing more than to run into his arms and kiss the scratches and dried blood away from him. Other than that, he looked relatively unharmed. His usual neat bun was not apparent on the top of his head, instead he let his hair hang loose, his bangs tied up in a messy half-up-half-down. He was dressed in all black, a dark oversized crew neck and baggy black sweats. As insinuated by the dark bags under his eyes, he didn’t look like he had eaten or slept in the past day or two. 
“Whose blood is that? Yours? Or someone else’s.” 
“That’s one way to say hello.”
“Answer.” 
“Doll, what’s wrong?”
“Suguru, are you okay?”
“My love, I took care of everything. We’ll be safe for the next few days, alright. We just have to lay low for a little while.” 
“Suguru, answer me.” 
“Shhh, everything is okay, doll. Your body's working overtime right now, and the pregnancy hormones can’t be helping.”
What? 
You stared at him. No way. 
“That test is your’s, right?” he questioned, his face filled with concern. “It’s positive.” 
You stared at him, then at the test. It was. 
“I- I’m gonna be a dad,” Suguru’s face cracked into a sincere smile. 
He picked you up and spun you around, planting kisses all over your head and face. 
“And you’re gonna be a mom! To my baby. Our baby. You’re gonna be the best mommy, you're so good with kids.” 
You stayed silent; you were still processing everything that just happened. 
“Sweetheart, what’s wrong?” he cradled your face gently in his hands. 
You stood frozen, thinking of words to say, but they never made it out of your mouth. Your vision went blurry with water, and the churning feeling you had been trying too hard to suppress returned to your stomach. You gagged, running over to the toilet. 
As you held yourself over the bowl, your body felt like it was trying to expel all of your organs out through your mouth. Suguru leapt to your side and held your hair back as you threw up, rubbing soothing circles into your back. 
“Shhh, baby, I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to freak you out, this is just one of the best things that’s ever happened.” Suguru cooed. 
You took a deep breath and wiped any stray vomit from your lips with the back of your hand. 
As you hurled your guts out, you felt his large, warm hand, rubbing circles on the small of your back. The other of his hands went to hold your hair out of your face. 
You stayed like that for about an hour, just sitting there, pondering your impending motherhood. 
Mother. 
You were going to be a mother. 
It simultaneously freaked you out and surprised you. Suguru, the person you loved most in this world, actually got you pregnant. Of course he did. He always stuck to his word.
When that man was committed to something, he was going to have it. He was possessive, territorial even. That made him all the more dangerous, but it wasn’t him you were afraid of or for. You were afraid for the rest of the world. 
I’d end the world for you. 
His promise echoed in the back of your mind. 
“Sweetheart, it is going to be okay. I think I may have gotten too overexcited and freaked you out. You don’t have to keep it if you don’t want to, I’m here for whatever you need. But, thank you. Thank you for this precious gift.” 
It was a gift that forever linked the two of you together. 
… 
September 2007
You found her waiting on a bench in the center of Shinjuku, trying to find something in her pockets, probably a lighter for her cigarette. 
“Hey, need a light?” Suguru asked, offering out a lighter. 
“Hi,” you waved shyly. 
“If it isn’t the criminals, trolling girls who smoke?” Shoko replied
“Just testing our luck I guess, '' Suguru joked. 
“Mmhmm, well, I’ll go ahead and ask. Any chance the charges are fake?” 
“No, unfortunately not
“Then I’ll ask another question, why?” 
“To create a world of only Jujutsu Sorcerers,” 
“We don’t want anymore of our comrades to die,” you doubled down on Suguru’s point. 
“Ha, that doesn’t make sense, but whatever,” Shoko said, picking up her phone and dialing a number. Someone on the other line answered. 
“Hey, Gojo? 
Yeah, found ‘em. 
Shinjuku. 
No way, I don’t wanna get killed.” She said before quickly hanging up.
“Do you have the thing we talked about?” Suguru asked before walking towards the area his best friend was said to be.
“Yes, I’ve got her,” Shoko looked into his eyes, 
“Okay, I love you,” Suguru said, placing a kiss on your forehead and walking off. 
Shoko put her cigarette out. 
“Shoko I’m okay, just, um, okay how do I put this…” 
“Dude, spit it out, you're scaring me.” 
“I’m pregnant.” you blurted out. 
“Shit.” the mousy brunette replied. 
 “No, it’s okay, really, I’m happy, we’re happy, just…scared - ” 
“Did you not use protection? You of all people? The mom friend? Well, now, I guess literal mom friend,” Shoko put her hands in her hair, scrunching it out of stress, “And you’re a fugitive! Both you and Geto have been sentenced to death by the elders. Jesus Christ Y/N, how the fuck are you going to raise a child as a fucking criminal.” 
“I’m sorry Shoko, I-I couldn’t,” your last word was muffled by the huge lump in your throat. You knew Shoko of all people would rip you a new one, but you didn’t expect it to hurt this much. Tears clouded your vision, and you were sobbing so violently, that you started to choke on the snot and water running down your face. People were staring. 
“Woah, dude. Shhh, it’s okay, I’m here now,” Shoko reached down to wipe some of the snot off of your face with the sleeve of her uniform. “Come on, let’s go get you cleaned up, I have some supplies that I brought in my bag.” 
Shoko grabbed your hand and led you into the nearby metro station. You rushed past the crowds of people, until you made your way into the gate. Shoko kept leading you further underground until you reached a room that was sectioned off for mothers and infants. 
“Get inside, we shouldn’t be bothered in here for a while,” Shoko stated, her tone gentle. You walked in, and she locked the door behind you. 
The room was small, but cozy. There was an infant changing table to the right, and to the left, there was a small blue couch with a table next to it. There were a few blankets packaged in sanitary wrappers laying on the side of the couch, and the room was decorated with pastel flowers all around. You felt completely safe for the first time in a while. 
“Sit,” Shoko commanded. You complied and took a seat on the couch. 
“I got one of those portable ultrasound things from the infirmary. I don’t know why we have these things but, hey, it’s coming in handy.” 
“How did you know to bring an ultrasound kit with you?” you asked suspiciously. 
“Oh, Geto told me to bring one. So, I kind of already figured you were pregnant, or you had some kind of internal bleeding. But with the way he was being so secretive, I figured the former.” Shoko replied, fiddling with the machine. It looked like a tiny foldable computer, the probe attached to a wire that fed into the screen. 
She KNEW???
“If you knew, then why the fuck did you make me say it out loud?” you demanded. 
“Because I needed to be sure this wasn’t a trick or something to kill me,” she shot back, “If ya didn’t know, your boyfriend -” 
“Fiancé -” 
“Fiancé, whatever, killed an entire village of people.” 
“I know, but he did what he had to do. We’re trying to make the world a better place, a place without curses, so you don’t have to keep seeing people die.” You refuted. 
“I’m not talking to you about this right now, I’m here to make sure you and the fetus inside of you are okay. You chose your path, and I chose mine. I’m not trying to change your mind, what’s done is done. I don’t support what you two did, but you’re still my best friend. I’m here for you,” Shoko finished and scooched on the couch to give you a hug. You were crying again, fat tears streaming down your cheeks. 
After five minutes, you two finally parted, and Shoko reached into her bag to produce some supplies. She pulled out sanitizer, a bottle of gel, a pair of gloves, and a little blue cloth. Shoko sanitized her hands, and gave some to you as well. She then put the pair of gloves on and asked you to pull up your shirt to reveal your abdomen. Finally, she tucked the blue cloth into your pants, so that the gel would not get on it. 
“This might feel cold. I also don’t really know if I’m doing this 100% right, so, you should probably find someone with a medical degree and not just reverse curse technique to look at you,” Shoko added, the usual banter reappearing between you two. 
She squeezed some of the cold jelly-like substance on your abdomen. You winced at the uncomfortable feeling. Shoko took the end of the probe and started gently pushing it around on your stomach. After about a minute, something appeared on the little screen. 
Woah. 
That’s your kid. Your and Suguru’s baby. You started crying again. 
You loved them already, and only wished Suguru could have been here to see this. 
“Yeah, there’s a whole-ass kid in there,” Shoko confirmed.
“As opposed to a half-ass kid?” You joked. Shoko laughed. 
Next, Shoko reached into her bag, producing a thick textbook. She turned to a page that was marked by brightly-colored post-it notes. 
“Okay, based on this development textbook, you’re probably about 9 to 10 weeks along. Can you use your technique and give me a blood sample fast?” 
9 to 10 weeks. 
That’s a lot farther along than you thought. 
You took a deep breath. “Okay,” and slowly produced a handful of blood from your palm, dropping it with a PLOP into the test tube Shoko held out for you. 
“I’ll run a test on this once I get back to the infirmary at school, I just wanna check your hGC levels to make sure they’re good. But in the meantime, start taking these,” she produced yet another item from her bag. “They’re prenatal vitamins. Also, I know Geto has to have some connections somewhere with doctors. Have him find one for you. I can check on you once in a while, but not all the time or it will get suspicious. I love you, but I’m also an eighteen-year-old who doesn’t have a medical degree yet. I’ll leave first with Satoru to make sure there aren’t any sorcerers around so that you and Geto can escape. Stay safe and healthy, please,” 
“Safe and healthy, coming from the chainsmoker?” You joked. 
Shoko rolled her eyes as she gave you a final hug, exiting the room, leaving you alone with the bag of medical supplies and textbook. 
… 
Mid January, 2008 
As the months passed, you did not think it possible, yet you fell deeper in love with Suguru. He doted on you and the twins constantly, spoiling you with gifts, having his followers help construct a lavish living space for you in the back of the monastery. Mimiko and Nanako shared a large room, their western-style four poster beds were adorned with silks and all of the stuffed animals they could desire. They had large walk-in closets full of dress-up gowns and expensive designer brands.
“Only the best for my girls,” Suguru would say. 
As for you, he had a beautiful master suite built, the double walk-in closet filled with comfortable, yet elegant, maternity clothing and a California king bed dwarfing the rest of the room. The walls were painted white with navy and gold accents throughout the room. 
When he was not tending to his cult, Suguru also kept you close to him as much as possible. Sometimes, he would even have you sit with him as you both tended to his followers throughout the day, him consuming their curses and you collecting their money. 
Though he saw you as an equal, he was still overly protective and territorial of you now that you were carrying his child. He would sit you down on his lap in front of your followers, his hands caressing your now-evident baby bump, proclaiming to both you and the people in the cult that you were a goddess among mere mortals. When the monastery was empty, sometimes he would just sit and hold you, breathing in your scent. You would sit like that for an hour sometimes, him feeling the baby kick against his large palms, trailing kisses up and down your nape. You would curl yourself up as much as you could to put your ear to his chest, his heartbeat drumming with excitement.  
When you weren’t helping Suguru, you were with the twins. Playing with them, going on walks, teaching them little things about the world that they missed while living in that cursed village. They were really excited to have a new sibling and talked about all of the clothes they would dress the new baby in. You had to remind them, of course, that the baby was not a doll. They also threw out name suggestions, but you had to tell them that unfortunately, “Princess,” and “Hello Kitty,” were not appropriate names to call their soon to be baby sibling. 
At the end of your long days tending to the needs of non-sorcerers that were actually useful to your cause, Suguru would have you both change out of your robes and start to cook dinner while you played with the girls. True, he could have hired someone to cook for your little family, but he wanted to take it upon himself to make sure that you were getting all of the nutrients and rest you and the twins possibly could. 
You somehow succeeded in carving out a nice life for yourself under the harshest of circumstances. Sure, it wasn’t the utopia you and Suguru had always imagined all of those nights back at Jujutsu High, but you had a little family of your own and were working towards a better, safer world. 
… 
After he finished tucking the girls into bed one night, you curled up with Suguru on the couch, your head tucked against his chest, and knees in between his hips, using him as a body pillow. One of his hands was around you and the other was used to cradle his head on the arm of the couch as you both laid there. 
None of your pre-maternity pants fit you anymore, so you threw on a pair of Suguru’s gray sweats and a white t-shirt. You practically lived in his clothes at this point. 
He started rubbing small, gentle circles on your swollen belly, seemingly in awe of your changing body. If you ever got insecure about your stretch marks, or how much weight you gained, he would make you stand in front of the mirror in your shared chambers, kissing every inch of your body. In the shower, he would take the time to wash your hair and help you shave. He wanted to let you know that you weren’t alone. Suguru was right there the whole time. 
You felt a fluttering in your stomach where he was rubbing your belly, and Suguru gasped, breaking the serene silence. 
“Hi, baby,” he whispered to your bump. Joy flashed through his tired eyes as his lips curved into a dopey smile. Then, he leaned up to press sweet, wet kisses into your neck. 
“The most beautiful woman in the world. How did I get so lucky?” Suguru cooed. 
“You’re stunning,” he continued, pulling you into a deep, passionate kiss. 
Since falling pregnant, you were sensitive to the slightest touch. Your fiancé was sensitive to the slightest glance from you. Your sexual appetites had grown increasingly insatiable. 
From his words and kisses, you could feel yourself drenching your underwear. As Suguru’s tongue continued to slither into your mouth, you absentmindedly started grinding against his muscled thigh, the friction feeling delicious on your clit. 
“Ngh- Sugu- p-please touch me. No teasing. Need you,” you moaned. 
“Do you need my fingers? I bet I can take you right now from how soaked you are,” he purred. 
“Don’t care. Want something inside,” you whined. 
“Lemme check you first. Don’t wanna hurt you.” And with that, he felt your soaked, clothed cunt through your pants and underwear. You were so wet, that a dark, sticky patch was starting to form on your sweatpants. You nearly ripped the pants off of you in the midst of your carnal need to have some part of him, any part of him, filling you. 
Suguru got right to work, stripping you of the layers concealing you from him. After a few circles on your clit, he sunk his middle finger into your cunt. There was no resistance; he was able to sink his finger all the way down to his knuckle. So, he added a second finger, which you took just as easily. 
You felt relieved to finally have something for your fluttering hole to suck on, but you needed more. You needed to be stuffed to the brim, completely full of him. 
“Suguru I need you inside,” you gasped, your cunt continuing to clench on his thick fingers. 
“Whatever you want, my love,” he replied, slipping his fingers out. You almost cried at the loss of contact, but you knew you were about to be rewarded tenfold. Suguru pushed his sticky fingers into your mouth as he rearranged the two of you. You licked his fingers clean, and he let out an unrestrained moan at the way you deepthroated his digits. 
Suguru sat you up, and scooted himself against the back of the sofa. He took his length out from his underwear, letting it smack his stomach, the tip weeping precum. Suguru removed his fingers from your mouth and used the remaining spit to cover his cock; a makeshift lube for the two of you. While he stroked himself, you climbed up on his lap and attacked his mouth with fiery, desperate kisses. 
He helped you remove your top, and then shed his remaining clothing articles. When he took your top off, you could tell that Suguru’s thoughts about the day had gone out the window. Suguru always had a fascination with your tits, now even more so that your tits had grown at least 2 cup sizes since pregnancy. He took one of your pert nipples into his mouth, sucking softly and grinding up into your wet heat, letting a grunt rumble through his chest.  
“Love, please,” you cried out, tears threatening to spill down your face.
With your pleading, he helped you to climb on top of him and lined his cock up with your greedy cunt. You slowly sunk down on his dick, feeling every ridge and vein inside of you. You both hissed as he breached your tight hole. 
Finally, you thought. 
Suguru resumed his sucking on your nipple, moaning around your soft mound, sending vibrations through your body. You were so overstimulated and sensitive that you felt like you were about to cum right there and then. 
He could feel that you were close by the death grip you had on his cock. So, he reached one of his large hands down from your waist and found your clit. You sunk your nails into his wide shoulders in response. 
“Give it to me,” Suguru growled on his way to give your other nipple the same treatment. 
The coil in your tummy snapped, the sensations driving you hard into your climax. Suguru moved to nibble on your earlobe, whispering what a good girl you were. 
As you came down from your high, Suguru’s hands moved down to your bump, staring in awe. 
“I told you I love this tummy,” he commented, his large hand splaying across your bellybutton. He pressed his forehead against yours. “I think it’s so beautiful, that your body submitted to mine.” 
“Mr. Geto,” you said with a fake gasp, sarcasm dripping from your voice, “If I didn’t know any better, I’d say you’re getting off on my predicament, you pervert.” 
“Touché,” he smirked. “I think it’s hot your body is going through all of these changes, just because of me. You’re mine,” he growled out the last words. 
“I’m yours,” you confirmed. 
“Suguru, I’m tired, I don’t know if I have the energy to ride you like this.” You realized he still hadn’t cum yet, he was probably in pain with the deep arousal he felt. 
“Okay, I’ll carry you to bed and we can finish there,” he pressed a kiss to your forehead and slipped out of you, your juices trailing behind in a sticky string where you were formerly connected 
He then picked you up, bridal style, and started the short walk towards your room. The cool air felt sensitive against your hot pussy and swollen clit, your arousal and cum now rolling in small beads down the back of your thighs. 
He set you on your side on top of your California king mattress, covered in fine fabric sheets. Then, he took one of the large decorative pillows and pushed it in between your knees to allow him easy access to your cunt. This position would also allow some relief to your aching lower back. Suguru knew you loved it when he massaged your back, so he started there, pushing circles into the sore muscle and kissing up your spine. 
His erection rubbed up against the back of your thighs, rendering the both of you delirious. 
When you both couldn’t take it anymore, he finally slipped into your warm, wet heat again. 
“How would you like me to fuck you, love?” Suguru questioned. 
“Slow and deep. Wanna feel all of you,” you drooled.
“Mmm, sounds perfect,” he responded, pressing wet kisses into your neck. With that, Suguru started a long, deep thrust into the depths of your pussy. You felt every part of him; every ridge, every vein. You made a sound that you didn’t even know could come out of you. 
Suguru picked up the pace a little bit, leaving little whimpers and groans in your ear as he rutted into you. Suguru was usually pretty reserved during sex, but he recently started to be more vocal for you. It spurred you on even more, made you even more aroused, which felt impossible at this point. 
“I love it when you whimper-nGHH,” you moaned, as Suguru punctuated the end of your sentence with a particularly harsh thrust. The sex started to feel desperate, animalistic almost. Suguru felt something primal within him snap. He needed to fill you, to stuff you so full, he would watch his cum leak out of your pussy. 
“Suugguuhh-“ you felt your second orgasm of the night closing in on you. 
“Cum with me, doll, lemme fill you, ngh, u-up,” he grunted, moving a hand down to toy with your clit. “You look s-so good, full of me. Ngh- your tummy all round, tits all plump, making milk for my m-my baby,”
For some reason, that sent you over the edge, clamping down on his cock and coming hard. Your cunt sucked him in with a firm grip, and you could feel that he was close too. As he continued to fuck you through your climax, his heavy balls slapped once more against your thighs, and he came with a gasp, a series of, “I love you’s” and “Thank you’s” flooding from his mouth. 
He fucked himself through his orgasm, and finally collapsed into the mattress. After a few minutes, Suguru pulled out, watching in awe as his release dripped out of your hole. His fingers traveled down to the mess the two of you made and swiped his pointer and middle fingers through your folds. 
“I probably sound like a broken record, but I don’t know what I did in my past life to deserve you,” he said, kissing the top of your head, moving both of his hands to rest on your bump again. 
“C'mon, let’s clean you up, doll,” he said, trying to drag you out of bed. But you were already fast asleep. 
Suguru smiled to himself, running to the bathroom to get some warm compresses and clean towels. When he finished cleaning you up as best he could, he made his way to his closet, where he fetched his favorite graphic t-shirt. He handled you with more care than he would a butterfly or a flower as he dressed you, and headed to the bathroom to clean himself up. 
After he deemed himself decent enough, Suguru walked over to your sleeping form and bent down to the level where your belly was. He criss crossed his hands and rested his chin on them. 
“I love you and your mommy so much, little one. You’re so loved already,” he whispered, reaching one of his hands towards your belly. 
Suddenly, he felt a small fluttering beneath his hand. Suguru smiled, his eyes alive with pride and wonder.
… 
The next morning, you awoke to the smell of something delicious. 
And four little feet running across the floor.
“Shhh, Nanako, you’re gonna wake up Kamo-san,” Mimiko warned her sister. 
“It’s okay girls, I’m already up,” you sighed, yawning. “You girls sleep good?” 
“Yeah. Can we get crepes today?” Nanako asked, changing topics rather quickly. 
“It depends on what time me and Suguru get done at the monastery, but there should be enough time. The baby has been craving some chocolate,” you chuckled.
“I have a new name for the baby,” Mimiko declared, starting to climb on your bed.
“Oh, yeah? What?” You scoop her up and bring her into your lap somewhat successfully. 
“Peach. Like the princess,” Mimiko said, matter of factly. She looked down right proud of herself. 
“Mimiko, that’s a fruit. I think it should be Sparkles,” Nanako responded back to her sister. 
“Well, we’ll have time to think about what the baby’s name should be, but for right now…I think we should eat some breakfast and see who can get dressed the fastest,” 
“Geto-san made some breakfast,” Mimiko stated. 
“And I helped,” Nanako exclaimed, attempting to have her voice heard in the conversation.
“I helped too,” Mimiko scolded with jealousy. 
“Why don’t you girls go help set the table too and I’ll be there in a minute,” you said, pressing kisses to their foreheads. 
“Fineee,” Mimiko rolled her eyes playfully. 
You freshened up, brushing your teeth and wrapping your body in a luxurious silk robe Suguru had purchased for you. 
As you made your way down the long corridor and into the kitchen, you could hear the sizzle of something cooking. You turned the corner to find Suguru, shirtless, standing over the stove of your enormous kitchen. You decide to sneak up on him, letting your finger creep around his waist as you pulled him back into a hug. You couldn’t press yourself flush against him, as your stomach got in the way. 
“There’s my girl,” Suguru cooed. 
“You’re making breakfast?” You beamed with tears in your eyes at the stack of American-style pancakes next to the stove. For some reason, this small gesture was making you really emotional. 
“Of course, baby. I let the chef take off this morning to spend some time with my beautiful girls before I have to head over,” he replied, snaking his arm back to grab on to yours and place a kiss on your palm.
It was so domestic. It was so normal. 
“Okay, order’s up. Mimi, Nana, will you help me put these on the table?” Suguru asked.
“Yes Geto-san,” Mimiko sang as she skipped towards the tower of the fluffy, golden deliciousness. 
“Thank you, sweetie,” Suguru whispered, giving her hair a ruffle. 
After the pancakes were eaten, and the syrup had ended up on the faces of the twins and Suguru, you pried the girls out of their seats to get dressed for the day. You and Suguru headed back to your quarters to change into your robes. 
As you let the luscious silk fabric cascade off of your body as down to the floor of your shared closet space, you felt the presence of your fiancé behind you. 
“Hi,” he smirked into your shoulder, starting to press kisses up your neck. 
“Hi,” you whispered back. 
One of his large hands reached down to your bump, caressing it with the lightest of touches. 
“Can I listen to her?” He asked like a giddy child. 
“My love, you never have to ask, you’re always welcome to,” you beam as he excitedly makes his way towards your protruding bump. “Baby’s been hanging out towards the bottom today if you want to feel them move,” you added. 
“Hi baby girl, this is your da-” 
“Baby girl? What makes you think the baby's a girl?”
“What makes you think she’s not?” he quipped, his usual banter-like tone making you giggle. 
“As a wise man once said to me; touché.” The two of you fell into a comfortable silence, soaking in each other’s presence. After all, slow moments like this would be rare when the baby arrived. 
Your peace was disrupted by a loud knock at the door. 
“Geto-sama, Kamo-san, there is someone here to see you, he says it is urgent” you heard Suguru’s assistant shout through the door. 
“Tell whoever it is that they have no right to request my presence. I will meet with them when I am in my proper attire,” Suguru snapped. 
“Of course, master. It’s just… this kid…” 
“No exceptions, I don’t care if it’s Satoru fucking Gojo himself, whoever it is can wait,” Suguru pressed, getting annoyed now. 
“Yes, of course, I wi-AHHHHHH,” a blood curdling scream erupted from the other side of the door, followed by a loud thump. 
Sensing danger, Suguru leapt into action, putting himself in front of you and summoning a curse. “Who’s. There,” he demanded. 
Blood started to leak under the door and into the marble tiles of your room. 
Suddenly, the door flew open to reveal the collapsed assistant on the floor, covered in her own blood. Next to the body, there was the figure of a small boy drenched in the scarlet substance. 
“Noritoshi?” you questioned, tears filling your eyes.
END OF PART I
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dividers by @bunnysrph
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sorry to add this on, but what if I hurted them aswell?
everyone makes mistakes I tell myself but yet hatred and spite and shame clears my brain. I made mistakes and realized but why is forgiving so hard? the thought of being a villain in someone’s story is so fearing and something I never want. should I forgive ? What if I’m not forgiven. what if I’m in the wrong.. the bad one even
thank you for answering my other one. Your words so well placed and I resonate with your work heavily.❤️
It's like when you get physically hurt: The pain is there to tell you to not do that again. Continuing to fret over it is like letting the fire alarm keep blaring after you already put out the fire. You screwed up, you know that now, and you know you're not doing that again. Forgiveness is a gift that's only given freely, without pressure, and if aknowledging where you messed up and letting them know you learned from it won't prompt them to forgive you, then the lesson you got is "don't treat the next one like this", assuming that you really did do them wrong for real.
You're always going to be a villain in someone else's story. There are complete fucking strangers out there who think that I have the moral obligation to kill myself and that the people who love me are wrong for not pushing me that way. There's always going to be someone who thinks that whatever you're doing is wrong. That's why you have to learn to ask yourself: Who got hurt by what I did? What could I have done to avoid that?
And then you tell the person that you unwittingly hurt that it wasn't your intention and you now know better than to do that again. And if you can't point to a specific person who was hurt by your actions, or think of anything else that you could have done instead that could have avoided this, then it is simply not your fucking problem.
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heavenlyvision · 2 days
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reverence pairing: bi-han/reader wc: 1.1k warnings: 18+ only, smut, cunnilingus, kind of angsty but not really, afab!gn!reader, no pronouns or y/n used a/n; this was gonna be only horny but then i listened to too many sad songs and now it has the vibes of two very in love people with unspoken feelings... my bad ! <33 MDNI | SMUT UNDER CUT
It’s early in the morning when you wake, Bi-Han moving around the room, dressing himself for the day has woken you up. He tries to be quiet – and he is – but you’ve developed a keen sense for when he’s trying to leave without bothering you.
Making grabby hands at him, you coax him over, wanting for him to say goodbye properly, he rolls his eyes but obliges and wanders over to you, “Why do I even bother trying to be quiet in the morning?” He sits on the edge of the mattress and leans down to you as you lean up.
Smiling at him, you answer, “I’ve no clue.”
He huffs but pulls you in and holds you close, his large hands rubbing soothingly up and down your back, “I shouldn’t be gone long…”
“…You always say that,” your sleepy voice murmurs against him.
He knows you’re right but he can’t help it, he means it every time he says it though and you know that much. There aren’t any words he can offer you right now, so instead, he tucks his head into your neck and presses soft kisses against your skin. His lips trailing the expanse of your neck, your head dips back to give him more room. They start off innocent, light, a show of affection more than anything else, but he can’t help himself and ends up nipping at your skin, the blunt feel of his teeth pulls a shudder from you, one that Bi-Han relishes in.
Soft sighs pass your lips as he leaves a trail of wet marks, reminders of where he’s been, taking his time with you despite his presence being required elsewhere. Slowly, he makes his way to your face and gently pecks both your cheeks before eventually pressing his lips to yours, his kiss consuming and deep. The words he can’t speak shared in this moment together, all of his feelings for you, his borderline reverence for you, it’s all here, in how he cradles you, in how he kisses you. He’s everything to you and you’re everything to him, you’ve never doubted that.
It's moments like this where you remember why you stay, you stay even when he infuriates you, even when he leaves without saying goodbye, even when he makes decisions you can’t begin to understand. You stay through it all because in moments like this, he reminds you just how much he–
“I revere you,” his forehead rests on yours, his words shock you sightly. Not the content but the suddenness.
You try playing off his abrupt admission, huffing a slight laugh, “Where is Bi-Han and what have you done with him?”
He frowns, “I’m serious.”
As happy as his words make you, they also make you uneasy, “…I know that...”
“My feelings will never change,” he mumbles softly, his lips trailing the side of your face.
“Never?” you whisper in question.
“Never.” He confirms.
His hands wander, exploring your body, slipping under your pyjamas, pulling at your skin and tugging at your clothes. He silently guides you to lay down, shuffling himself back, he takes your pants off and chucks them to some corner of the room. Looking into your eyes, he checks with you, you feel especially vulnerable right now, this moment feels different from any other time before.
Opening your thighs for him, he takes his place between your legs and turns his face to the side, beginning to mark your skin. His pace is slow and reminiscent of worship, his focus completely on where he is right now, never on where he’s going to be next. You don’t whine, you don’t ask him to move, you don’t rush him.
You feel dizzy and light, like you’re drifting as he does as he pleases. His lips are forgiving and undemanding, his tongue wet and adoring. Making his way to your underwear, he presses his face to your core, nosing at your centre. He mouths at your panties, wetting them, licking at you through the material.
Small noises leave you, sighs and bitten back moans, his hand presses into your stomach, holding you down, stopping you from wriggling away from him. Your panties are wet from your arousal and his insistent mouth. The material sticks to your cunt embarrassingly, it doesn’t stop Bi-Han though, he moves both his hands to spread your pussy lips with his thumbs, opening you up from under your panties, and then he goes back to licking at you through them.
The stimulation of your wet underwear rubbing against your clit has your stomach doing flips, your mind not able to concentrate on anything other than how good it feels. He prods his tongue at your pussy hole, meeting resistance and pushing his face in between your legs impossibly closer.
You don’t ask him for more, you don’t ask for anything, you’re pliable and absent, happy to lay here and be worshiped by his mouth. But he’s lost in you, in everything about you, your scent, your taste, your small sighs of pleasure, your willingness, the softness of your thighs beside his ears, in all honesty he isn’t actively thinking anything other than you, only you. Only ever, you.
Needing more from you though, he slips your panties off, finally sick enough of there hinderance to remove them completely. He resumes his position between your legs quickly, missing the warmth of you almost immediately. The feeling of his tongue on you feels sharp, in comparison to the dull pleasure you were receiving beforehand, this feels direct and overwhelming, almost overstimulating.
He doesn’t stop as you wiggle more insistently, just wraps his arms around your thighs and holds you open, not letting you go anywhere. Lapping at your cunt happily, his tongue reverent in its exploration. Your hands tug at the sheets, fingers almost hurting from the grip you have on them, your eyes closed tight against the pleasure running through your bones.
Your thighs shake either side his head, your eyes dazed and thoughts hazy, thoughts filled with him, of your devotion to him. You twitch in his hold, your cunt pulsing with your impending orgasm, a noise rumbles through him, like he’s delighted by your approaching end. Every muscle pulls tight as you cum, a supressed whimper leaving you with it, your head thrown back into the pillows. If you had the ability to, you would be grinding down onto his face but he holds you still and swallows your release, licking at you as you come down. The slurping noises that come from him make your skin hot to the touch.
He stays between your thighs for a few moments after, relishing in your heat, your warmth. But all at once he seems to become cognizant of the fact he’s meant to be elsewhere right about now and crawls up your body to look into your eyes.
“I am devoted to you, wholly, I will always come home,” he promises.
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