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#therapy culture
nando161mando · 4 months
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sonictalismans · 5 months
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Therapy culture is killing the social niche of the confidant. Stop it! If I hear the word "trauma-dumping" one more time, I am going to dump everyone saying it off a cliff, causing them to sustain severe trauma.
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liskantope · 27 days
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From theneurodivergentadult's Instagram:
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Yeah it's probably not such a great use of my (or any of my followers') time to rip apart everything in this meme to justify why I object to it to the extent that I do. And some of my followers may already have a pretty good idea of where I'm coming from regardless of whether they agree.
But let's just say that it serves as a good example of the absolute epitome of the set of (sub)cultural beliefs and assumptions that these years I complain about the most, including the "internal experience supremacy" idea ("humans are the experts on their own minds" is ugh such an exasperatingly misguided conviction and this is from the same social movement that increased awareness of mental illness and therapy culture both of which kind of hinge on not always understanding one's own mind aaargh).
Really, though, I should point out that at least half of my issue with this comes from the meme format which encourages stating one's point in an absolutist fashion at the expense of nuance. The text by the Instagram post explains that we should be open to the possibility that someone is autistic without medical diagnosis, which is a reasonable position that I agree is justified by several (though definitely not all) of the points mentioned by the meme, and is a far cry from "self-diagnosed autistics are valid".
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bbygirl-obi · 8 months
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"the jedi don't have therapists-"
jedi philosophy, and in particular the practices and teachings that jedi were expected to implement in their everyday lives, was therapy. dialectical behavior therapy (dbt), to be exact. anyone who's familiar with dbt knows where i'm already going with this, but like genuinely look up the basic tenets of dbt and it's identical with what the jedi were doing.
dbt, to put it simply, is a specific therapy technique that was designed for ptsd and past trauma. it's pretty different from traditional talk therapy. it combines a few different environments (individual, group, etc.), recognizing that no single format of treatment can stand alone.
the key focuses of dbt include:
emotional regulation- understanding, being more aware of, and having more control over your emotions
mindfulness- regulating attention and avoiding anxious fixation on the past or future
interpersonal effectiveness- navigating interpersonal situations
distress tolerance- tolerating distress and crises without spiraling and catastrophizing
i'm sure it's already clear from that list alone how much the jedi teachings correspond with the goals of dbt. the jedi value, teach, and practice the following:
identifying and understanding emotions
mindfulness and living in the present
compassion, diplomacy, and conflict resolution (on interpersonal scales, not just planetary or galactic)
accepting and tolerating certain levels of distress or discomfort (particularly mental, such as discomfort at the thought of losing a loved one to death)
idk man seems almost as if jedi mental health practices and dbt are two sides of a completely identical coin. (fun fact: both star wars and dbt are products of the 70s.)
and guess what? dbt was specifically designed as a treatment for borderline personality disorder. remember that one? or, if you don't, maybe you remember a specific character, the one who was literally used as an example by my professor in my undergrad psych class when she was teaching us about bpd?
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tldr: simply existing within the jedi community, practicing jedi teachings, surrounded by a support network of other jedi of all life stages, was the therapy for anakin. even when viewed through a modern lens. it was even, more specifically, the precise type of therapy that has developed in modern times to treat the exact types of mental issues he was struggling with.
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talking-revolver · 1 year
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Begging people to start using the term "misplaced pathologizing" or something. "Therapy culture" makes it sound like you're blaming the entire field of psychiatry for narcissists using clinical terms to sound smart and make it seem like other people are the problem, or that getting psychological help is somehow equivalent to fandom brainrot.
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*tries to organize my thoughts*
*remembers i'm not in school and therefore beholden to neither heaven nor hell nor any man's grading system*
*joyously shredding & tossing all my carefully arranged 3x5 mental notecards into the air like so much beige confetti. raising my arms in victory, cheering raucously until i accidentally inhale bits of homemade confetti*
(*coughing up itty bits of paper like a cat evicting a hairball with a firm understanding of tenants' rights*) wait wat happens next
#i marie kondoed my thoughts and *i* feel great. but now my stream-of-consciousness has escaped containment#so many innocent bystanders at stake#every time i try to organize my thoughts i run out of plastic bins and have to make a trip to the container store where i get even more dis#racted so. you can't just hand me THIS brain and NO catalogue OR library classification system#and expect me to single-handedly sort through all this nonsense? bad form but fucking form not in my job description#aNYways. formal education sure did a FUCKING NUMBER on us huh#(a number i measure not in gpa or dollars of student debt.#but in the number of therapy sessions & medical debt it will take to recover.)#seriously folks. our education systems are...innately traumatizing for a huge number of students. and we NEED to address this.#the fact that it is culturally common for adults to have anxiety nightmares about school/exams...even decades later?#that is not cute. it is Alarming.#no one--much less entire generations--should be spending their developmental years in an environment of chronic stress & pressure & strain#and yet that is the reality for millions and millions of pre-teen and teenage and young adult students#this isn't healthy and it serves and empowers NO ONE#...except of course the many exploitative educational & financial & debt-collecting institutions thriving from the current balance of power#and of course it's a nefarious and powerful way to sabotage/erase the middle class#which billionaires and the wealth-inequality creators they finance couldn't possibly have any noteworthy interest in whatsoever#it's not like there's an elite group of people with huge financial incentives to drain/steal resources from the masses...#anyways sorry for going all Conspiracy Theory on you.#obviously the billionaires who control the vast majority of our resources and news and political campaign funding#are not tied to every single itty bitty social issue and i'm a silly billy to imply it#please tell elon musk to ignore this tweet i am so subservient and acquiescent#mr musky u r so good at inheriting slavery-built mining fortunes & buying other people's companies#& building rocket ships & fancy cars that do NOT explode/catch fire & also NOT running billion dollar companies into the ground#mr musky u r so talented genius billionaire playboy with 10 kids and ex-wives who find you creepy af babe u r basically iron man
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miredball · 9 months
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sydney and carmy established relationship headcanons:
carmy’s a pet name guy. he’s been weaned on pet names his whole life (‘bear’ ‘sugar’ one could argue ‘cousin’). he uses the typical ‘baby’ for syd, which she loves, but one morning she walks into the office and upon seeing her carmy murmurs a “hey honey” and she gets flashes of a kitchen with a window over the sink, an herb garden, something warm and expanding and joy joy joy
they get found out by the rest of the staff at family. well, it’s a series of family dinners. they start sitting next to each other, then carmy’s arm is on the back of her chair and syd’s rubbing his back after he chokes on some rapini. what confirms it for everyone though happens on a lull in the conversation so everyone hears it. sydney needs something from the kitchen and as she’s getting up, for the bit, carmy motions to scoop the last piece of marcus’ take on a pandan chiffon cake out of her plate. she turns to him with a quickness and a huge fake grin and says “carmen, I will literally fucking kill you” as she backs away, to which carmy laughs (laughing!? carmy?!). then he puts his own slice on her plate. richie and nat share a look and the noise at the table comes roaring back to life before carmy realizes it even left. shouldn’t spook those bears.
they move in together and both feel really good with sharing everyday life with someone else. they go to farmers markets and change the garbage under the sink and get a drawer for carmy’s vintage denim. they leave notes on the fridge, much like they do on the whiteboard at work. there’s photos and take-out menus and also vague post-it notes from syd like ‘quail eggs!!!!!! not real’ or ‘break into 45th and Syracuse – man in farmer hat (durian connect??)” and lame weird inspirational quotes from carmy “There’s no one thing that’s true. It’s all true❤️” and sydney’s like what and just thinks they’re funny and doesn’t really make sense but loves him a lot
when carmy can’t sleep he makes sure the blankets are warm around syd and hangs out by the open window for a smoke. he doesn’t smoke as much as he did before and he’s working on cutting it down. sometimes syd wakes up and comes out the bedroom to find him and says “carmy” and sleepily perches on his lap, arm around his shoulder and curls her head into the crook of his neck. her fingers hold onto his gold chain and he stubs out his cig and plays with her hair instead.
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sadieshavingsex · 1 year
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I’m tired of healing I’m tired of waiting to heal I’m tired of researching what’s wrong with me I’m tired of feeling pathologized im tired of pathologizing myself im tired of not feeling safe im tired of overanalyzing everything im tired of not being able to make a decision im
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gold-snek-hoe · 2 months
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Hello and welcome to Opinions from an Internet Nobody. Today's essay:
"Ger therapy" is the new "You need Jesus": One Weirdo's Navigation through Cultural Shame
This is a supposedly well-meaning sentiment that is often weaponized against people who are behaving outside of perceived cultural norms. It's a favorite of homophobes who see queerness/transness as a mental illness, but I've been seeing it used to demonize kink (which historically is often linked to queerness), and more generally any "weird" behavior that makes people uncomfortable.
For example, otherkin, systems (especially those with fictives), and people who take fictional characters as partners. Y'know, "weirdos" who "can't separate reality from fiction." And, sure, sometimes there can be a problem with that distinction, but I know as well as you that most internet strangers saying "get therapy" don't actually give a shit about the mental health of those they target. It's code for "your behavior makes me uncomfortable, stop it."
Same sentiment as "you need Jesus."
This has actually taken me a long time to figure out. I've been in therapy for my entire adult life, working through various traumas, severe depression, anxiety, all that. Those were the biggest problems as they negatively impacted, and often endangered, my life. It was only after my hospitalization in 2020, where I was finally put on much needed medication, that I could start to grow into myself.
I changed my name. I top surgery. I came out as polyamorous. I finally got my official autism diagnosis. Now I'm fuckin' married! But... there are still things I'm working through in therapy. Mainly, shame over my "weirder" behaviors. My current therapist has been a huge blessing in helping me accept the things I was too ashamed to admit.
Now, I feel comfortable enough to share.
I'm otherkin. Always have been. My connection to my humanity is tenuous, and I'm sure that's connected to my autism. When mad, I feel phantom horns sprouting from my forehead. I have a tail that swishes back and forth at the base of my spine. In my soul, I am monstrous, and years of therapy has not erased that.
I feel like I'm only half in the physical world most of the time. This doesn't hinder my real-world success (I graduated college Summa Cum Laude, have an IMDB page, and am on my third book), but informs the way I look at the world. There's a whole other universe in my head that hums along with me in my day-to-day. That's part of why I'm so skilled as a writer. To ask me to divorce from that is to tell me to stop existing. Sorry, it's how I've always operated.
Lastly, and this is the one I'm really anxious about, I have a fictional husband. Now, looking at my blog, you might say "yeah, no shit," but I don't just ship myself with him. I mean I practice pop-culture Witchcraft, and the Goblin King is my patron. I mean I have a Labyrinth-themed tarot deck that I talk to him with. I mean I held a ritual to spiritually marry him. Basically, I Snape-wived myself.
And guess what? My therapist isn't concerned. It's not hurting my ability to live my life. I have other interests, hobbies, and goals outside of him, which he actively encourages in all our tarot sessions! I wouldn't be doing this if he didn't support me. My IRL spouse is usually there for whatever magical shit I'm doing, and supports me! Some of my closest friends know, and the only complaint I've gotten is "this guy seems important to you, I wish you told me sooner." Hell, my MOTHER knows and supports me, which is huge, because our relationship was pretty damaged after I came out as trans.
If you have a problem with the way I live my life, when literally nobody else does, take a good long look at why. You don't give a fuck about my mental health. You just don't like that I'm weird.
Tl;dr: My mental health is better than it's ever been since embracing the weird, so leave me and my imaginary husband Marak Sixfinger alone.
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craycraybluejay · 3 months
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apparently it is morally wrong to have a crush/sexual feelings for anyone in general. Like. the whole 'dont sexualize literal people ewwww.' i really really wish less teens were on the internet because of this kind of stuff. we are mass-producing mental illness and i am not kidding.
like imagine being 15, having a crush on someone in your class, going on the internet, and being bombarded with all sorts of people saying its wrong to experience sexual thoughts towards people in your peer group. its wrong for adults to have sexual thoughts about other adults. its even more wrong for you, a teen, to have sexual thoughts about your classmates.
you are 16 now and very lucky to be in therapy with a well off enough family. you confess to your therapist how evil you are for wanting to touch or look at that one girl in your class. she looks at you with confusion, like how your mother looks at you when you ask her why you have a computer and your friend doesn't. why is it fair. everyone's confused about you and you are confused too. you're evil, you must be, because you have dirty disgusting feelings. you deserve to be mocked online, says dogluvr15089. you're an evil monster, says @Official Priest of West California. you're a pervert and sexual predator, says fandom_m0m321. they have stupid names and no faces-- but if all of them are saying it then it must have some truth to it, right? your therapist is saying something but you don't hear her, you're in your head wondering if you should punish yourself, how you should punish yourself. when you're back in the room with her you ask her what's wrong with you. she writes you a diagnosis for ocd and anxiety. you take the drugs, like the good, righteous, pure teenager you want to be. they make you feel weirdly empty, and not very hungry, and kinda sleepy. they might give you dementia in your 50s but who cares. you deserve it for being gross. you look through the comments even on other people's stuff, the comments telling them the same thing you were told. you're still punishing yourself for natural feelings-- seeking out the same degrading bullying when you don't get enough of it. you don't tell your therapist you are doing this; because you know she would tell you to stop and you don't want to stop. it's a compulsion. you talked about those last Tuesday.
you're 17. you haven't asked anyone out. by some miracle, a girl who likes you takes the initiative. you stumble through the date awkwardly and anxiously, trying not to touch her, flinching away when your fingers brush over a cheap burger. she asks if you're okay, and then asks, "don't you like me?" She asks, "why do you look like you're scared of me or something?" You stay silent. But then when it happens again, she gets up to leave and the rejection causes the dam to break. You try not to cry, because that's Emotional Manipulation. You choose your words carefully, because you don't want to accidentally Gaslight her like the evil thing you are. You stumble through it but you tell her you're sorry, you tell her you've never had the chance to date. You tell her, shaking like a leaf, like a dumb idiot, that you really really like her and she's very pretty and you're scared to say Hot or Sexy so you don't. And you tell her you're scared. You're really scared she'll see you're a bad person and leave you for someone more pure and good. You try really hard to phrase it like a PR team would. She tells you that's ridiculous, laughing like sunshine and kisses and god, sex. But most of all you've never heard someone so flippantly tell you how ridiculous of a notion that is. She makes you feel brave. You tell her what people have been telling you, scared that you're Trauma Bonding her but pushing through. She, with more surprise, again tells you it's ridiculous. She's not laughing anymore, but you want to make her laugh. You ask with a voice too small for your age if its okay you think her laugh is really sexy. She smiles so brightly its blinding, and says she thinks you're sexy too. You hold hands when you leave together. You go on more dates later, and the two of you talk about your problems and your dreams. And she shows you how to yell at "internet dumbasses." And you still go to therapy except this time you think it's working, because this time you Get It. You get it's ridiculous, and you're happy enough to try to heal.
And you know what? You're one of the lucky few that got that chance. Many teens struggle with mental health problems due to the internet. Not all of them are caused by this purity bullshit. Some of it is body image-- accounts that encourage eating disorders and low self-esteem. Some of it is trends and feeling lonely and unlikeable. Social media doesn't just excaberate mental illness. Sometimes it really and truly produces it and this fact needs more awareness.
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The values captured in art shouldn’t remain in the museum - they should go with us into the playroom. 
- Alain de Botton, Art as Therapy
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liskantope · 23 days
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I may as well share my semi-effortful (though rambly) comment on one of Ozy's recent posts criticizing Amanda Shrier on her recent anti-therapy-culture book, as I imagine more people might see or interact with it here than in that comments section. What I'm most interested in here is, what does it mean to experience the emotion of happiness?
I learned of Shrier's existence and her book from seeing her interviewed by Coleman Hughes on his podcast, and I thought throughout that interview Shrier sounded like she was made of good common sense (it helps that I'm already broadly in sympathy with wanting to push back against what we might call "very online therapy culture" which Ozy seems also to be in agreement with), with an exceptional moment here or there: for instance, at some point one of them (I think it was Coleman) seemed to imply that it's good when children are slightly scared of their parents. While there may be some empirical evidence somewhere that children who are slightly scared of their parents stay on the straight-and-narrow and have more positive life/career outcomes or something, this idea still massively creeps me out. But still, overall in conversation, Shrier comes across as reasonable. I think this sequence of posts tearing apart her parenting beliefs as expressed in her book (unless a bunch of these quotes are grossly taken out of context in some way I can't see) show that she's less reasonable "in writing" and that her more deliberate beliefs that she expresses in her work represent a pushback that is righteous initially but goes to an unfortunate far extreme in the other direction. The part of her interview that stuck in my mind the most, actually, was her line about "We used to ask kids such-and-such; now we ask them about their feelings all the time", which wasn't something that had occurred to me before but I was open to where she was coming from. So I find the response to it in the end of this article interesting. I don't say this with much confidence, but I tend to feel more like Shrier on the issue of how often we're actually feeling the emotion of happiness, although I don't think I'm clinically depressed or at all prone to it (although I have a rather negative outlook at the moment about my future prospects and the world in general which may prevent me from feeling much wholehearted happiness, but that goes for a lot of us. I think perhaps a majority of people relate more to Shrier here. Just yesterday or so, I saw a post from a Tumblr mutual saying they haven't had a single actually *pleasant* day in years like they used to in the 2010's, only "good given the worse background situation" days. This seems to relate to the same idea. Maybe due to recent shifts in world events most of us have moved in that direction? I don't know.) I would suggest actually from reading the end of this article that the difference might come not from psychological make-up but from a disagreement over the definition what it means to feel happiness, where Ozy's definition aligns more with what Shrier and I would call "feeling okay".
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Summary: After a mission gone very wrong, Vader is forced into court mandated therapy to calm the concerned citizens of the galaxy. His assigned therapist? The only one who would take him: brand new therapist Luke Lars.
Author: @ladyvader23
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borderlinebelle · 18 days
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damn so, therapy did, in fact, heal me 🤡
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turns out, i just needed someone to talk to…
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as well as returning to a lower dose of ADHD medication, exercising consistently some cold and old coping skills, and practicing some self care .. imagine that.
It’s always the same answer and my dumb ass is always shocked.
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fucking hell… brain and behavioral brutal battery on my senses
🔪🫀 🧠🫁 got trapped within my own mind again 🙂🙃
haha. ok, ok… let’s just … reset!
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d3sertdream3r · 3 months
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Just a reminder that relating to characters is perfectly normal! There’s a reason human beings have been endlessly telling stories for thousands of years, and why a lot of those stories are still told today.
In fact, there’s even a thing called Cinema Therapy where professional therapists work through movie plots and character arcs with their patients to help them process their real life trauma.
This is why representation of all kinds is so essential in storytelling! Whether it’s representation of race, culture, gender identity, sexuality, or forms of trauma, seeing ourselves in characters is a powerful way to heal and explore our psyche.
Don’t pay attention to anyone who is childish enough to mock you for being protective over characters that make you feel seen and understood! Be loud and proud about stories and characters that you love! 😁
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NPD + HPD + DID culture is the only way your therapist can get you to open up to her about the system is pulling the "well i find the disorder fascinating and i love to hear about it" card because it makes you feel special and interesting even though most systems would rightfully take offense to a singlet saying that
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