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#this did NUMBERS on twitter so hopefully tumblr enjoys it just as much
kokokulto · 2 years
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hi ! long time fan of your work Koko :) i wanted to ask you what your experience has been like delving into each social media platform, trying to get a feel for each, and now settling on tumblr ? how would you compare each of them, and why do you feel that tumblr has been your best experience so far? thank you for your time <3
[really long post lol]
There are so many things going on in my mind that I want to be able to articulate into words as I read this question lmaooo.
To have a fuller understanding I've talked about quality over quantity of social media interaction here and here. To summarize, I did some reflecting after attempting to 'reboot my art accounts' earlier this year. I realized that attempting to spread myself thin doesn't make me happy and I should only focus on a platform that encourages meaningful feedback and thoughts from other people. To me, Twitter and Instagram was not a place for it due to the nature of its design and algorithm.
I prefer comments over numbers. Something that in my experience isn't super common on Twitter or Insta (unless you're a really big account, or your post blown up to a massive audience). Most interactions there start and end with a like, and perhaps if they are generous enough, maybe a Insta Story share or retweet. The stories are just plain, and it's not often one get's a quote retweet (if you have more qrts, then you are being ratio'd LOL). It's a numbers game. The only parameters you base your "success" on these platforms is through the amount of likes or retweets you have. I am not saying it is impossible to have a good experience on these platforms, nor saying it's impossible to get mutuals there. However, I personally did not feel that people are actively encouraged to actually say something about the artwork if the person isn't a mutual or someone they already know. One experience that put it into perspective was when an old FNAF painting I did got around 1,500 likes despite the account being new and bare. Flopped on Insta but blew up on twitter; it dawned on me how meaningless and based on luck these large numbers were.
Now, here is where tumblr kicked in! Tumblr was part of the social media 'i tried to reboot'. I know that the growth here can be long (the ban, and people left blah blah yeah), and honestly did not expect much from it. But, I channeled my familiarity with tumblr from 2014 and remembered: "hey! In the tags, guys". Posting and reblogging made me enjoy the "tag culture" of this hellsite—even WAY more than before! The "comments via tags" thing is almost a way to give your thoughts and prayers remarks without the expectation for direct social interaction. Some people prefer this over the actual comment section, and it makes them more comfortable to say something about the work! I value every reblog that has comments and tags. Being able to hear your thoughts about the piece, why you like it is 1000% better than tons of likes. I get to actually see why people interact with the post; I'd describe it as having a touch of humanity in the interaction. Actual quality!
This is inherent to Tumblr's design from the beginning. There were no likes on this site before. At its core, people must reblog. And with the whole craze back then on this site with fandoms and such, people just started blurting out comments via tags. Even when likes were first introduced, the number reblogs often out weighed the likes. Because tapping a singular button and ending it there doesn't actually show much appreciation! Being on a platform where the community is encourage to use the tags beyond blog organization is amazing. Input and thoughts, are valued here and I think that's pretty cool. I look at the type of interaction the platform can give, not its quantity. I had fun time here at 40 followers, am still having that same fun at 200+. Probably will be the same throughout! (hopefully)
At the end, this place is still social media and one's relationship with it should be monitored. All comments (good and bad) shouldn't go to your head too much. But, at the very least, Tumblr's design and community allows a bit more of a humane touch when interacting with someone's work.
In terms of design though, I like that tumblr allows for different types of media (videos, audio, image sizes, long posts, asks + answers). Its archival system and the ability to open different blogs is also cool. Customization and markups are really nice! I love how personalized this place can be.
Hopefully this answers your question, and is comprehensive enough LOL . Again, this is my experience, and my journey. It may be different from yours. Just remember to go where you grow while having fun!
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misfitprose · 10 months
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Bluebird of Unhappiness
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I’ve briefly blogged* about this before (more about that later), but while I’m sick and I’m told it’s too hot to go out, I figured I should organize my thoughts into something that will hopefully help me make up my mind.
After a few false alarms, it really does seem like Twitter will soon be a thing of the past, without even the mocking affection that MySpace is usually remembered with. It’s not even because tastes have changed, either; mismanagement is running everyone off. Imagine opening a public library, yet keeping one section closed to everyone but a select few who give you huge “donations” – then putting all the bestsellers and research materials in there. Oh, and “friends of the library” will be allowed in after hours – everyone else must leave by 3pm. You can only borrow four books, and if one is really big, it will count as two...unless you’re willing to pay, of course. Paupers don’t deserve literature, you see!
Yeah.
But the thing that I liked about Twitter is that you only shared as much as you wanted to. I have a handle I made up myself, no personal pictures, and I didn’t even put my general location. I’m not obligated to follow anyone, and you don’t know if I have ties to anyone else on Twitter (unless we tell you). Sometimes, I just want to brief casual acquaintances on what’s happening with me without going into detail they might not want.
The best thing about Twitter, in my humble opinion, is that celebrities are accessible and on equal footing with the rest of us schmucks. These aren’t Facebook pages run by fan club presidents or randos – this is Legit Famous Guy on his personal phone. Have you ever written a letter to a celebrity (throwing it WAAAY back here!), and received a form letter reply in return? How do you even know if this person even reads their own mail? It’s like screaming into the void at the cost of your own saliva on the stamp. (Yes, we did that back in the day!) People share all kinds of things now, and in real time no less. It’s easier than ever to embarrass yourself by Tweeting “Hi, So-and-So! I had a crush on you for years” #cringe
Facebook...or as most people call it these days, Minions Memes That Your Middle-Aged Relatives Post Twenty Times a Day. I don’t know about you, but my entire extended family is on there and they probably don’t want to know exactly what I’m looking at when I’m avoiding them. It’s too personal. You have to go by your full name – and I have a fairly unique combination of names – and from there, it’s a small step to locating you IRL by looking at your friends list, college, or workplace. The last thing I need is one of those “Orym has bloodlust” Critters tracking me down. There are pictures of my niece and nephews on there. They shouldn’t be held accountable for my rants. I like keeping my real life and my online personas separate, thank you very much.
Just when I finally screw up the courage to go join Instagram, it seems like most of the cast is migrating to Bluesky. I joined the waiting list, but it’s so long that by the time I can join that, too, I will probably be eligible for retirement. I did join Mastodon, but the only way these unofficial watch parties are going to work is if a good number of us are on there. Most of us were already on Twitter, so it worked.
*Does anyone even have a traditional blog anymore? I set mine up years ago, and I enjoyed rambling on and on there (when I remembered to use it). On Twitter, you’d have to daisy chain a series of Tweets on there, risking alienating followers who don’t have time – or limits these days – to read them all. Tumblr, now that I’m here, seems hugely popular with more of the kinds of people I’m better suited to. There doesn’t seem to be as much customization that I’ve noticed, but I look like less of an old woman yelling at clouds when I say “my Tumblr” as opposed to “my blog”.
The future of connecting? Well, since we aren’t about to give people all over the world our private numbers so we can text them, I guess we’ll just have to latch onto whatever becomes available to the bulk of us.
Or we could go back to writing letters. Anyone got a stamp?
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tkwrtnewsfeed · 2 years
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Newsfeed #128 September 30, 2022 (30 Yavannië)
Yes, I am back (and after this post, I will be back later today after getting so sleep. It has been a while. I would explain what happened and how some unscrupulous people try to interfere with the completion of this trilogy*, but that is whole other book in itself.
While I was preparing to return to writing this story, I hadn't realized that the Facebook page for this book had blown up to his largest did. I did not find out until after my ordeal that I'm not going to discuss right now. So naturally, when I announced I was coming back, it blew up some more. I should learn to expect that when I'm dealing with Thranduil’s side of the family. Got worse after the premiere of Amazon Prime’s Rings of Power series. That, I can't explain.
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I’ll be bringing sexy back with @thegnotesots​ (hopefully soon, but I digress).
Let me update you on a few things before the events coming later today:
1. We’re back to Middle-Earth. I missed it a great deal. I was right in the middle of returning sooner when something interrupted that continuity and nearly cost me everything. It is a long story that I may share one day on @jmmauthoroftkwrtrilogy​ after everything gets back on a steady schedule.
2. This book is currently about 1400+ pages long (that is including Book II: The Saga of Thranduil and current first half of Book I: The Epic of Eryn Galen. This number does not include the @extendedtkwrtrilogyend​ which is longer than the original by a lot of pages.
3. There are Videos. I will do those a lot on the book’s Instagram page. As with everything else, they are clever visual metaphors to tell people about things coming up and/or things you might find interesting.
4. This schedule is this way because I am also writing with a co-author on @thesecretofthehouseofbourbonbook​ (which is also a trilogy about the House of Bourbon). Currently, I am also writing on @lesecretdelamaisondubourbon​ (about Louis XIV). Yes, it is another king telling his story. I enjoy writing for that perspective. It is comfortable for me, and most people seem to enjoy doing that. It is not every day a short woman gets to play two tall/blonde blue eyed kings. Somehow, I will manage.
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Also, I let it slip about the return of the standalone books (like @oflordsandkingstkwrtbook​)
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The story of Legolas’ mother side of the story called “The Song of Seven Rivers”.
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And the final installment called “The Lore Masters.” I had to stop somewhere. That will be six books, you realize. (and that doesn’t include the sister series called @thehouseofdurin​ by @fortunatelyclevercandy​. But even with delay of over a year, I have somehow managed to stay abreast of the storylines, and I’m sharp as a tank. Tack, I meant tack. Look, it’s almost 2 in the morning and I haven’t had much sleep. Cut me some slack. Be glad that even after a year, I am still way ahead of schedule. I know, that’s really weird.
The reason for such a short writing schedule for TKWRT is because I am the most familiar with the stories. After all, it all began here on Tumblr in 2015. The Secret of the House of Bourbon just started its reign in 2019 and only recently started being posted on all the important sites. Which reminds me, TKWRT is on Twitter and Instagram as well as Tumblr and WordPress.
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Okay, so we’re good, then? We’ll see you later today. I better set the alarm. Great. This is going to be an interesting seven days. Night, night. 🌜✨🛌
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rank-minus-seven · 2 years
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I didn't get the chance to do my daily pixel art prompt (which was Mech Suit btw) so I'll try to catch up and do that and the following prompt tomorrow when I'm done with streaming and handling some work stuff.
I think I have an idea for mech suit that'll at least work in 16x16, 8x8 is going to be the bigger challenge for sure.
I did get to do some chores I've been putting off today though, and got to go on a really nice walk by the river too. That was nice. Even got some Javascript practice in (albeit just a little) and the concepts I learned over the week I didn't forget (and felt a little clearer) after taking yesterday off from studying since I has having bad brain fog yesterday.
I get to play more Klonoa on stream tomorrow, and I'll be starting the no-damage challenge, which will be pretty fun! I've been struggling a lot to find the motivation to keep my streaming schedule up, but at least I'm enjoying the things I've been playing, even if it's tanked my numbers over the last few months. It is what it is.
I don't really have a place on the internet other than this blog where I can just ramble into the void and nobody will read it. And even if people do read it (btw thank you for taking the time out of your day to care about a random stranger's mundane ramblings about their day-to-day life for even a few minutes), it's not a big deal. I'm much more interested in having a space to chronicle my stuff I do in a more casual way than my twitter or my stream. Everyone kinda needs a space to just exist without any pressure. A longer-form blog is that space for me. It's also a lot easier to curate my tumblr feed than it is my twitter.
I just like looking at nice pictures and reading about the successes of others, no matter how small. It makes me feel like there's still good things in the very noisy and stressful world we live in.
Mobile isn't letting me add tags, so I'll remember to edit this post when I'm on my PC tomorrow. Hopefully I remember at least!
Edit: I did eventually remember.
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ourchunkysalsa · 3 years
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nachoscheesy · 3 years
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Tumblr Revival
Tl;dr
Tumblr has a large interconnected community of artists and content creators, and should focus on its strengths and what it does right. Instead of trying to compete for space against Facebook, Instagram, and Twitter. Tumblr should focus on empowering its community and giving that community the tools to develop the site's unparalleled uniqueness.
Tumblr is the crossroads of the internet, with a monthly user traffic of 300 million it is the perfect space for artists, content creators, and small businesses to grow their following without having to fight for a seat at the table against companies with huge budgets.
Hi, I go by Nacho here on tumblr, and I'm sure as many of us on tumblr have noticed, the (hell)site is kinda going downhill. Tumblr was bought by Automattic in fall of 2019, and I am sure they have the best intentions to help tumblr stay afloat. However, I think it's time the community took a more deliberate approach to how tumblr is handled, and hopefully Automattic and @staff will hear us out. I think I have a solid solution to tumblrs money issues, that will help both the site and empower its online communities.
First and foremost, I am not involved with Tumblr or Automattic. I am just a simple blog trying to help out a place that I've been on since 2010, and I would hate to see it die here around 2023.
So, let's get to the root of the problem on tumblr right now. That being money, tumblr is currently costing more money that it produces, as we've seen with its 97% drop in value from 1.1 billion dollar sale to being sold at around 3 million dollars.
So the first thing that must be improved before anything else can be improved on tumblr is how much money they're bringing in a month. I don't think folks on tumblr hate monetization as much as we all collectively say we do, I think the issue is that most advertisers are completely disconnected from the groups they are trying to advertise to on here. Tumblr comprises roughly 65% millennials and 30% gen-z, the two generations that advertisers seem to have the hardest time advertising to for a myriad of reasons. The main one being that they don't fully understand what we want, and sometimes just don't listen to what we are saying.
Lets look at how tumblr makes its money, Tumblr has four main revenue sources,
Ads by sponsored posts
Display ads through video posts
Sponsored Day ads or banner ads
“Premium Themes”
I'll go into depth on all of these and how tumblr could make potential changes to improve their revenue anywhere from three to six months after it implements some or ideally all of these changes.
First tumblr ads and sponsored posts, these changes are going to be contingent on tumblr allowing its users to share, like, and comment on ads much like all other media sites currently allow. Or at least giving advertisers the ability to turn that on or off as a function.
The average tumblr post gets reblogged 14 times, that number increases significantly if the ad is engaging and actually caters to the communities wants and needs. My reasoning for giving users the ability to reblog ads is to increase user engagement while maintaining their current ad vetting process and all of the nonsensical ads that are run on tumblr 90% of the time.
The other reason for allowing tumblr users to share and comment on ads, or have it be an option for advertisers to turn on or off as they'd like, is that the appeal of tumblr is the ability to propagate and obsess over the most niche things (i.e OSHA.)
All the while allowing content that gets shared all over the internet bubble up to the top through the collective hand of the tumblr community. Along with this tumblr has no way for small users to share their own products or services, every single major site has a way for users to advertise their pages or products through the site.
Tumblr is a content machine that creates imagery and memes that get shared all the time across the internet, so the ability to share and curate its own ads is paramount to improving advertising and user engagement on tumblr.
My proposal here is for tumblr to expand its advertising capabilities to all users, while charging a flat rate fee to advertise on tumblr, with additional charges for popular tags or trending tags. Tumblr currently has no self service advertising system much like Facebook does for example. Where facebook charges a daily rate on cost-per-click(CPC) or cost-per-thousand(CPM)
Charging a flat rate fee at a rate of a day, week, month, or quarterly basis with variances in prices based on the lease term and what the advertisers would want to have their ads show up on certain tags. This would open up the doors for small businesses that don't want to advertise on places like facebook, twitter, or google with their complicated CPM and CPC models. Also bringing in more small locally owned businesses with the added value of less competition for ad space on tumblr.
This would also take some of the weight from tumblrs own advertising staff from having to explain a convoluted system to potential advertisers. Creating a simplified model with the the advent of tumblrs own infrastructure able to get a single post to a large variety of users. Where the current ad model uses a “shotgun” method to hit as many people as possible, the tumblr model could encourage advertisers to curate a more personalized and intimate experience that tumblr users would love.
Why not just advertise elsewhere? Tumblr still in fact gets over 300 million views a month as of June 2021 (Statosta), and the added benefit for users to be able to like, share, and interact with ads would allow ads that the community enjoys to be talked about more. Giving advertisers more honest feedback about their ads while increasing their SEO’s.
Also small businesses that can't compete with the vetting processes that are used on other sites, would have a better chance of developing their business and increasing their clientele on tumblr whose core demographics are approximately 60% millennial and 35% gen-z. This core demographic does in fact care about being able to shop at local stores, or even a store across the US that is trying to drum up its own online sales.
These ads could be placed inline on the tumblr dash while moving other sponsored ads to the right of the site on desktop, but making them alternate on mobile between user ads and sponsored ads.
Second, the display ads should be changed to allow tumblr users to share and further interact with ads to generate more user engagement, incentivizing more businesses and companies to build their brand status on tumblr. Tumblr has a good model for creating short diaries or daily vlogs for companies that wish to show off their products on social media. This includes smaller businesses and vlogers that want to post videos or tutorials of themselves on their blog.
Tumblr is a good site for user engagement with a pool of creative potential for anyone wanting to gauge the desire for a particular subject or piece of media, maybe even an upcoming show. Having the ability to share and comment on sponsored ads would also help advertisers by allowing them to get more bang for their buck with a considerable uptick on how users engage with that content.
Third, tumblrs sponsor day ads and banner ads are inexpensive and should be highlighted as a selling point over their competitors. Tumblr 24-hour banner ads are considerably more affordable for businesses when compared to places like twitter with their 200k price point. For the same amount of money on tumblr a business could have their company at the top of the dashboard or app for 8 whole days. Much longer and much better than the competition.
Keeping this price fixed, with a change in the price CPC is still a much more lucrative and attractive selling point than any of the competition on the internet today. I know this might not be exactly what tumblr wants to hear when it is hemorrhaging money right now, but let's look at the cost for these 24 hour daily ads and banner ads. If tumblr hypes up the price point on these ads they could see a significant rise in advertisers considering the lack of competition on tumblr and past success stories of companies who did advertise on tumblr.
At the same time larger advertisers should be encouraged to make engaging ads and blogs on tumblr that will make people want to actually go to their blogs, that then link to an external site or page. Not ads that instantly try to force you to go to some other site, by rewarding or offering special discounts for people who find a special code or something off of the actual blog. Or even for giving the same code to everyone who reblogs a certain post made by the advertiser.
Seems too good to be true? Look at “Asos” back in 2015 when they held a shirt design competition on their tumblr blog. Where they had 900 submissions, four of which were picked, and were sold out of the user generated shirts in 10 hours.
This is not the only case however, but FX ran their own campaign for the show “Man Seeking Woman” where they saw a 2.8% increase in user engagement, 86% increase in their tumblr followers, and they actually saved money through advertising on tumblr.
All this leads me to believe that tumblr actually was and continues to be the best place for brands, small businesses, and artists to develop themselves through genuine user engagement.
Finally, the “premium themes” that are available on tumblr that allow for unparalleled customizations that you hardly find elsewhere on the internet anymore. Tumblrs ability to take a variety of media sources, as well as having an unparalleled level of customization, user interconnectivity, and a vibrant artistic scene shows that it is ripe with potential.
Tumblr could still use its post+ feature, but in the same way that Discord uses its subscription service. For cosmetic changes that can be added modularly to the site or individual blogs for an additional monthly fee. In conjunction with partnering with community artists to bring small cosmetic additions to individual blogs, while paying the content creator and tumblr taking a small portion of the profits over a certain amount.
To be completely honest this is probably the hardest portion of this entire pitch to make changes to in a shorter period of time, considering all the testing and “under the hood” changes that must be made. However, I think that implementing this as well as the other changes I have proposed will bring back more foot traffic to tumblr as well as increase its revenue and profitability.
In closing, I am simply working with whatever information I was able to find online and a good amount of time invested on my part to do this. I think tumblr has a ton of potential still to return as a force for good for the communities that exist and want a change from what the internet has become. Time and time again when any company or public entity dies it was because it did not change and refused to adapt and innovate, oftentimes not at the hands of the people working everyday to keep the site running. Instead at the hands of people who dont see the value in what has fallen in their laps.
If you agree and think this is something that can be done, please reblog this post and follow me for more updates. If I don't hear back or this does not gain any traction by the end of the year, then tumblr can go to its inevitable end. I will be here sinking with the ship.
@support @engineering @music @wip @changes @photomatt
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violettelueur · 3 years
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— JUJUTSU KAISEN EPISODE TWENTY ONE || JUJUTSU KOSHIEN
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↳ featuring : basically everyone at this point from jujutsu kaisen
↳ warnings : mention of violence + mention of injuries + EXTREME grammar issues
↳ form : story
↳ published : 20 april
↳ pronouns : she/her
↳ word count : 4.4k
↳ synopsis : within the jujutsu world, there were three famous clans to be aware of, the Kamo clan, Zenin clan and the Gojo clan. However, unknown to many sorcerers there was one last family that was known to be apart of the three, only for them to disappear after the golden era leading some to speculate that they had died in battle after the sealing of ryomen sukuna, but....
↳ previous episode : nonstandard 
↳ next episode : jamais vu
↳ barista’s notes : let me admit, i ain’t confident in this chapter since i started school again, but i hope you enjoy this episode and thank you for being so patient with me as i try to fit tumblr into my schedule with school ʕ ꈍᴥꈍʔ
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BEFORE READING, I NEED YOU TO BE AWARE OF THIS:
1. the whole story belongs to Gege Akutami and the credits go to them and them only.
2. the spell curses used belong to Tite Kubo due to them being the ‘Kidos’ being used on the manga and anime ‘Bleach’ - but none is mentioned in this chapter.
2.5. for the ‘cursed spells’/kidos (bleach) i will link this video here and tell you the time stamp to check out what i am intending to show - remember i add a few twist here and there by adding the katana to link with Y/N’s cursed technique : hopefully this video is slightly better...
Destructive Curse Spell Number Thirty-Three : Sokatsui (6:00-6:07) (blue lighting explosion - Itadori Yuji)
3. if you are confused on anything, please don’t hesitate to message me since i know this whole thing is so confusing.
this is Y/N outfit when she came into the baseball game (blame twitter)
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“How much longer are you going to stare at her? It’s creepy”
Snapping out of his daze, Gojo quickly looked up from your sleeping figure to find his stoic student (who was now sitting up) looking at him with a deadpan expression before he turned to look at your sleeping figure as well with somewhat of a worried expression, wondering what caused you to be knocked out since what Fushiguro could recall was that the last time he saw you, it seemed like you were well and confident before he was carried away by Panda.
“Is it bad to worry about my daughter?” Gojo questioned with a hint of a teasing tone before looking back down at you with his small smiling turning into a straight line.
“Student to be exact, but I guess not after what the curses were after,” Fushiguro quietly mentioned causing Gojo to once again, look up to view Fushiguro with a confused expression painted on his face, trying to convey that he didn’t have a clue on what his student was trying to say. “The special-grade was after L/N...but I don’t know why,” Fushiguro instantly declared as if he was answering to his teacher’s perplexed expression leading to Gojo sighing in frustration before taking one of his hands out of his pocket to stroke your hair as if it would bring you some comfort in your dreamless slumber as he then processed to remove his other hand from his other pocket to reveal a carton of orange juice before placing it on the bedside table.
“Is that so?” Gojo asked rhetorically, before making his way towards the door since he was informed that there was going to be a meeting with the Jujutsu Tech principles and sorcerers that were involved with the whole Exchange Event incident.
However, before he was able to grab onto the handle, the wooden door violently flew open showcasing his other students Itadori and Kugisaki on the other side with a box of pizza in hand leading Gojo to smile at them both.
“Oh Gojo-sensei! What are you doing here?” Itadori asked once he comprehended that it was his teacher blocking the way to see his two other classmates.
“Ah~ I was just visiting Megumi and Y/N before I go, make sure to not make too much noise, I’m sure Y/n would really appreciate it,” Gojo answered with a cheerful tone, leading Kugisaki to tilt her head to the side to realise that you were sleeping - much to her disappointment.
“She’s still recovering?” Kugisaki then questioned, leading her teacher to look at her before explaining that you were knocked out due to using an excessive amount of cursed energy within a short amount of time causing Kugisaki to nod to his little lie since he didn’t even know why you were extremely distraught when he came to collect you.
“I’ll be going now, so see you later~ don’t wake up my precious daughter!” Gojo states with a playful tone, before waving his hand to all of the first-years leaving them to themselves with a warm box of pizza in hand.
                                                 ꕥ
“Next up are the casualties: three second-grade sorcerers, one semi first-grade sorcerer, five assistant supervisors, and two cursed storehouse guards. They’re all sorcerers who were standing by at Jujutsu High and working separately from Gojo-san and Principal Yaga. We’re waiting on the report from Ieiri-san, but we’re nearly certain it was the work of the cursed spirit that Nanami-san encountered before,” Ijichi explained as he was looking down at the document sheets he had in hand to inform all the sorcerer that was in front of him about the situation at hand.
“Tsk,” Gojo tutted in annoyance while leaning against the door with his lower face tucked into the collar of his sorcerer uniform.
“Do you think we should share this information with the students and the other sorcerers?” Utahime asked as she turned to her colleagues.
“No,” the Kyoto principal: Gakuganji quickly answered, as the fellow principal from Tokyo: Yaga explained that it was better for this information to be among the higher-ups as he didn’t want to cause anymore panic to the students residing in the area right now as well as not wanting any of the curse users in their captivity to know that a few special-grade objects that been stolen from the school premises.
“Has the curse user we captured spilled anything?” principal Yaga queried, leading Ijichi to explain that it wasn’t hard to get the certain curse user to talk at all since he was quite cooperative but all they managed to receive was irrelevant information that was deemed somewhat unhelpful to them.
“However, he claims that he only participated in the attack because he was ordered to as part of a deal,” Ijicji added, before informing everyone about the monk that the curse user was talking about when he was interrogated.
“An androgynous monk kid with a bob cut? That ring any bells?” MeiMei asked, as she turned her head slightly to peer at Gojo, who was right behind her.
“Nope! We sure he’s not spouting bullshit? Is there any sorcerer skilled at getting confessions?” Gojo answered before asking his questions since he knew he couldn’t be too sure if the curse user was even telling the truth in the first place.
“How did a cursed spirit and outsiders get through Tengen-sama’s barriers in the first place?” Utahime questioned, as she was still confused on how so many people were able to get in without any problems and alerts.
“That was probably the work of the special-grade cursed spirit the students fought, that one has a unique presence. Even though it’s a cursed spirit, it’s incredibly close to a natural spirit. According to Aoi, it was able to hide among plants and was quite burnt from a few techniques like wood would be, and Tengen-sama’s barrier doesn’t function against plants. Tengen-sama’s barrier puts all its power into hiding, not protecting, so once you get in, it’s kind of weak,” Gojo answered his colleague with an explanation that led the whole room to turn completely silent for quite some time.
‘Are they worried about Sukuna’s Finger enhancing Yuji’s potential? Or are they trying to enhance themselves? Why would they need Y/N then? Something isn’t sitting right’
“For now, let’s be glad our students are safe,” Utahime mentioned with a calm smile presented on her face as there was one calm and good news that they would celebrate on.
‘Safe? How long until Y/N is going to stay safe? For how long?’
“But it goes without saying that the exchange event is now cancelled,” principal Yaga informed everyone as he turned to look at the fellow Kyoto principal, who was sitting right near him.
“Hold on, that’s not for us to decide, is it?” Gojo asked in a light tone, causing everyone in the room to look at him in confusion since they didn’t know what they meant by it not being their decision.
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“When did you start getting along with that gorilla?”
At this moment, Itadori and Kugisaki were sitting next to each side of Fushiguro’s bed, as they were visiting both you and him, while all of them were munching on the pizza (which only had a few slices left) that was currently sitting on top of Fushiguro’s legs.
“Well, we got along, but like...I remember what happened, but I wasn’t exactly myself then…” Itadori answered in complete uncertainty as he didn’t even know the answer himself, causing him to scratch his head in confusion.
“What, were you drunk?” Kugisaki questioned in confusion since she was expecting a confident answer from her classmates.
“You believe I could’ve been drinking liquor in this situation? I’m shocked,” Itadori mentioned before looking down with somewhat of a disappointed look that his owl friend thought of him like that. “But I’m glad you and Y/N weren’t seriously hurt, Fushiguro. You’re able to eat pizza now, too” Itadori stated with a smile on his face as he turned to look at the shikigami user before turning his head to see your still sleeping figure on the bed behind Kugisaki causing her to turn around to check if you had woken up yet.
“Come on, bring me something easier to digest,” Fushiguro replied since he was still recovering but nonetheless, took the food that was given to him.
“No complaining,” Kugisaki answered back before taking another bite of her pizza slice before snatching the box away from Itadori, who was about to grab another slice, due to her wanting to save the last remaining two slices of the cheesy food for you.
“Apparently, I got off easier because my cursed energy was all dried up, Ieiri-san was still able to fix me up as soon as the roots were removed, but I didn’t know Gojo used up so much cursed energy as well, Gojo seemed really worried when he went to Ieiri-san,” Fushiguro explained before turning his head to glance at you.
“Huh, so that’s a thing that can happen?” Itadori questioned.
“You fought against them, didn’t you? Also, did you see the flowers right above us when we were in the veil? They were so pretty!” Kugisaki commented, before looking up as if she was going to answer who was the person was that released the technique.
“Flowers? Oh, you mean the pink ones?! Kugisaki, those were so dangerous, didn’t you see the blue lighting explosion that happened right after?! It literally gave the curse a whole gash across its body!” Itadori exclaimed in shock causing Fushiguro to remember the array of flowers that were hanging in the sky when Panda was carrying him just before he crossed the veil.
“It was so beautiful though, I hope to see them again, I wonder who it was?” Kugisaki questioned before finishing off the last piece of pizza.
“Itadori, you’ve grown stronger. Back then, we both said our convictions were proper ones, I still think that’s true. Or, put another way, we’re both wrong,” Fushiguro mentioned with a low tone, causing both Itadori and Kugisaki to look at him as he was talking.
“Huh?” Itadori uttered in a confused tone, while Kugisaki processed to rest her face on the palm of her hand with a small pout.
“Some questions don’t have answers, you know. You’re thinking too hard, you’ll go bald,” Kugisaki mentioned.
“That’s right. There is no answer, it’s just whether or not you can accept it. But there’s no accepting anything if you can’t have it your way. Weak sorcerers can’t do that,” Fushigurp replied back causing the whole room to go silent as they were beginning to process what Fushiguro had said in his mind.
“So I’m going to become strong, too. I’ll surpass you in no time,” Fushiguro declared as he turned to face Itadori with a look of determination.
“You never change,” Itadori responded with a small light giggle.
“Don’t just move the conversation forward without me, we need to catch up with him and Gojo,” Kugisaki mentioned with annoyance painted on her face.
“That’s my brother’s friends for you!” 
Suddenly, the first-year trio rapidly turned their heads forwards to suddenly discover Todo sitting down right in front of Fushiguro’s bed with a smile on his face as he nodded proudly of the conversation that he had interrupted.
Unexpectedly, Itadori rushed towards the glass sliding door next to your bed and opened it with a loud bang before swiftly sprinting away from Fushiguro’s room as fast as a cheetah, only for Todo to follow behind him yelling out where his brother was going.
“I’m grateful to you, but give me a break!” Itadori screamed, causing Fushiguro and Kugisaki to look at the scene with deadpan shocked faces. However, what they didn’t seem to notice was you softly groaning at the loud noise that was happening right now leading your eyes to slowly open but quickly close due to the bright lighting in the room right now.
Hesitantly, you slower opened your eyes again to see a maroon coloured ceiling before blinking a few times to focus your sight, causing you to gradually sit up on the bed you were laying in as your looked down onto your lap leading your hair to cover your face away from your classmates, who now finally noticed that you had awakened from your slumber.
“Gojo, you’re awake!” Kugisaki announced with a smile on her face, yet that smile slowly disappeared once she noticed how you weren’t answering her at all, but rather you kept silent as your hand began to bring itself to your forehead as if you had a headache.
‘So loud…’
After sitting in silence for a while, you noticed that you were wearing a long white button-up with some black Adidas shorts leading you to wonder who changed you since Kugisaki was the only one to ever see you in your undergarments since she was always the one barging into your changing room to throw more clothing pieces for you to try. However, that was one minor inconvenience to think about right now.
Slowly, you turned your body around (so your back was facing Fushiguro and Kugisaki) before placing your feet down onto the wooden flooring, leading Fushiguro to worry about you falling since you had been asleep for quite some time, yet for some reason, you couldn’t hear him at all.
Steadily, you began to stand up with your hand on the mattress to keep some stability in case you did stumble back before you began to make your way towards the gap of the glass door that Itadori and Todo left through before gently lifting your head up to admire the clear sky from above.
‘It’s warm…’
Casually, your body began to lean on the side of the door to give yourself some support as you began to brisk in some of the light warmth the sun was giving you as if that was enough to bring you the comfort that you wanted right now before noticing how the wind was slowly picking up.
“Gojo, you would really get back in bed, you’re still in the healing process and it’s quite cold,” Kugisaki mentioned as she stood up to come to collect you and guide you back to back. However, for some reason, something was telling her to stop as she noticed how you were not listening to anyone at all - or, you just didn’t hear them as it seemed like your hearing was blocked for any human to human communication.
Instantly, the wind that was picking up suddenly blew out a large gush causing some of the leaves from the trees to violently ruffle from its branches while your hair was now messily blowing in the wind as you leaned against the side closer to maintain your footing before you steadily noticed a few pink petals making their way towards you from your right side causing your eyes to widen in shock.
‘There’s still some more?’
Slowly lifting your hand to the sky, you lightly felt the petal grazed your fingers ever so slightly before they slowly become disintegrated to a flow of cursed energy they were made out of causing Kugisaki to look at them in amazement as she stood by your side, as she realised that more was coming towards you both as if you were a magnet to them leading her to come to an assumption that you were the one that cast the flowers back when she was in the veil with the other students and teachers as she remembered that Gojo mentioned that you had used a lot of cursed energy.
“Pretty…” you softly muttered with a small but disheartened smile, trying to hide the emptiness that your heart now had to endure.
“Right,” Kugisaki answered back as she leaned her body on your side while continuing to admire the small flower show that was happening right now causing you both to not realise that the person behind you had his eyes widened as if he had just remembered something that he had completely forgotten about.
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“So anyways, a lot happened and some people died, but how about it? Want to  continue with the exchange event?” Gojo asked all the students who were in the room right now...well all of them minus one.
“Where is Gojo though? Shouldn’t she be here?” Fushiguro asked while standing here the staircase as Kugisaki and Maki began to look around the room to see if you really weren’t here with them causing him to look at Fushiguro, scared about his perspective skills.
“Ah~ about that, she’s moving her stuff from her dorm to my clan’s estate for her safety!” Gojo announced before clapping his hands to the side like he did when you first came into Jujutsu Tech leading everyone in the room to widen their eyes at the news since it was quite unexpected since you seemed like the type to reject the idea since Tengen’s barrier was helping you to be protected - but for you, it was easier for you to hide your family heritage if you weren’t in the dorms much to your dismay.
“I don’t know what to say about it…” Itadori muttered as he was thinking of an answer for both the continuation of the Kyoto Sister Exchange Event as well as your sudden move away from the Jujutsu Tech student dorms.
“Obviously...we continuing it, of course,” Todo declared, causing Itadori to suddenly tense up as he steadily backed up near Gojo to have some coverage and security.
“Your reasons?” Gojo asked as he turned to look at the Kyoto student.
“First, only those with a connection to the dead have the right to mourn them, it’s not our place to butt in there and second, if people have died, that’s all the more reason we need to become stronger, besides if it weren’t for the flower technique back then, we wouldn’t have been able to cause more crucial damage to those cursed spirits. Acquired strength comes from the accumulation of results. Tasting defeat and savouring victory is what leads up to grow, the most important part is for those results to exist,” Todo explained as he became to recall the blue lightning that damaged the special-grade curse to a massive degree which was enough for him to gain the upper ground during his fight leading Gojo to internally smile at the information.
“Todo-senpai’s surprisingly reliable,” Miwa whispered to her classmate Mai.
“Reliably crazy,” Mai answered as she rested her head on her knuckles.
“Third, when a student feels like they weren’t able to bring out their best, it hangs over them until they die,” Todo mentioned with a confident smile.
“How old are you?” Gojo suddenly questioned, as Todo wasn’t even as old as he was and the Kyoto student was already talking about ‘hangs over then until they die’.
“I’m fine with that,” Fushiguro mentioned.
“We’ll win anyway,” Kugisaki stated with confidence.
“It sounds stupid, but he has a point,” Kamo replied with calmness.
“Why don’t you rest, Kamo-kun?” Nishimiya mentioned as she stared at her classmate with a fed-up expression due to the bandages wrapped around his face.
“No objections here,” Panda declared as he was answering for the second years in the Tokyo side.
“Salmon~” Inumaki replied back.
“Will we draw lots for the individual battle pair-ups? I want to see Gojo beat Todo’s ass again,” Maki asked before mentioning you since she wanted to see you in a proper fight rather than the million of practice rounds you had with her causing Kugisaki to smile at the thought as well.
“Huh? There are no individual battles this year,” Gojo unexpectedly announced, causing all of the students from both Tokyo and Kyoto to become extremely perplexed.
“I hate routines, you know. Every year, we put the competition methods in this box and open it on the day of,” Gojo explained before tossing the wooden box to Itadori, who looked up for his permission to take out whatever was in the box which he was granted when the teacher nodded at him.
Reaching into the wooden box, Itadori’s fingers felt one single piece of paper within the box before he carefully took it out to see what was written on it, only for him to blink that the wording in pure confusion.
“Baseball?!” Principal Yaga exclaimed in confusion leading Itadori to suddenly discover that both principals from the Jujutsu Tech schools were peering over his shoulders, causing Gojo to walk out of the building with a pleasant smile on his face.
Once outside, he could hear the commotion from behind as he stretched his arms happily before placing his hands in his pocket as he noticed you were standing in front of him with some distance, while one hand on your hips and the other holding a familiar carton of orange juice that he remembered leaving on the bedside table when you were recovering.
“Going home?” he asked before making his way towards you.
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Currently, you were walking towards a certain baseball field after finishing some moving your items to the Gojo clan’s estate with an outfit consisting of a simple white button-up shirt tucked into a long black skirt paired with black heeled ankle boots that you decided to wear for the first time since they had been sitting in the box for quite some time after you had brought them on your last shopping trip with Kugisaki.
From what you could hear from the distance, there seemed to be a lot of shouting going on meaning someone didn’t know the rules of the game or they just been called out and the player wasn’t having it at all.
Opening the metal gate, a few people began to notice you coming into the field leading some of your Tokyo classmates to greet you while a certain black divine dog decided to leave it’s owners side to rush to yours before sitting down in front of you with what seemed to be a happy look on its face causing a small smile tp quickly appear on your face as you began to pat its head.
“Hi there,” you greeted it, causing the dog to bark back at you while its tail continuously thumped the ground as if to express the happiness it had when it saw you.
“Shouldn’t you go back to Fushiguro to play the game?” you questioned it causing it to whine slightly before listening to you as it got up and turned back around to head towards Fushiguro, leading you to look at the side to see if there were any seats for you to sit on.
“Ah, Gojo! Are you going to play baseball with us?” Itadori asked cheerfully, causing you to smile back at him before rejecting the offer.
“You guys already started, so there is no point in my playing, but thank you for the invite,” you stated before quickly taking a seat on the bench behind you as you patted your skirt to stop any creases that were going to appear before spectating the game that was happening in front of you right now.
After a while, you had to admit that watching everyone from Jujutus Tech play baseball was certainly more interesting than the actual official game themselves on the TV screen you see from time to time, while Kugisaki throwing her helmet to the ground after the whole pitching machine incident to everyone being shocked at Momo catching the ball on her broom leading Itadori and Inumaki to shout to Todo being hit by Maki’s pitch leading everyone to encourage her further.
‘What a mess’ you thought with a grateful expression on your face that you weren’t playing in his game for the second day of the Exchange Event.
“Are you okay?” someone suddenly asked, causing you to snap out of your thoughts to look to your right to find Fushiguro looking at you with an unreadable expression on his face. 
Unable to say your answer, you nodded at him before turning back to face yourself forwards as you gradually began to recall some of the events that had happened for the past few days before your head steadily placed itself on the middle of your chest as the empty feeling was somewhat still lingering - like as if something was dragged out of your soul.
‘1000 years ago…’
“Yeah...I’m fine,” you answered slowly as more information began to recall in your mind. From how you were sealed a thousand years ago only for the same sealed to be opened fifteen years ago leading to where you were now...surrounded by people that could potentially either keep you safe or do something that had many outcomes, especially with Sukuna residing within Itadori - with relief he didn’t know anything about your real birth.
‘Should I tell Gojo?’
“Gojo...I wanted to ask...have we met before? Like before we met in Sendai?” Fushiguro questioned you with a stutter causing your eyebrow to crook up in confusion leading Kugisaki, who was next to you to look at you with the same confusion.
“No, we never met before, you drag,” you answered, still perplexed on how he came up with a question with such an obvious answer leading you to lift your hand to flick his forehead for such a stupid question.
“Is that so?” Fushiguro muttered under his breath before looking up in the sky with amazement at how far Itadori had hit the ball with his bat while you and Kugisaki did the same.
‘Tiger of the West Middle...still lives up to that name’
Unexpectedly, you heard a childish giggle leading you to turn your head to find Gojo passing the school principals while using his infinity to keep the ants below his feet safe to which caused you to scoff in amazement at how lacked he was to use his technique all the time.
“Let’s go home Y/N!” Gojo shouted, causing you to look at him with a crooked eyebrow before scoffing once again at his playful behaviour.
“Let’s go home,” you whispered under your breath before everyone in the first year stood by your side and followed you out of the field to have a conversation with you before you left to go back to the Gojo estate.
‘Home huh?’
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© violettelueur 2021 : written and published by violettelueur - do not steal or repost
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tsuisou-no-despair · 3 years
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Higurashi When They Cry: Gou -My “Final” Thoughts
Since we’re getting a second season - and it’s so obvious that Gou was written as the first half of the story - I find it hard to rate Gou at this point in time. Do you remember how when Avengers: Infinity War came out and a lot of critics were like “well, we need to see Endgame before we can really make our judgements”? Yeah, it’s like that - hence why “final” is in quotes.
Even so, I still have some thoughts about Gou, Higurashi as a whole, and my experiences with getting in on something’s fandom. I’ll make a post for what I want out of Sotsu later - right now, here’s what I have for Gou.
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What I Liked About Gou
Most of it, honestly! I enjoyed Gou greatly and I’m glad I sat down and gave it a watch. (This may be heresy, but I honestly found it better as an experience than the last airing-weekly anime thing I sat down and watched - that being Mob Psycho 100 Season 2) But as for the stuff unique to Gou thatI particularly liked:
First off, having a new Higurashi anime that’s actually good. We needed something like this after Outbreak, Kira and (to a much lesser extent) the non-Saikoroshi parts of Rei pushed the series deeper and deeper into a trash can.
I love the new art style and the new designs for the characters. There’s a lot of good in DEEN’s adaptation, but a lot of the time the art left something to be desired. Passione’s take on Hinamizawa gave us a cast that can be cute and beautiful and terrifying all while looking good.
There’s also a lot of really good cinematography - the shot used in the GIF above left me going ‘holy shit”.
The new themes are a triple threat of bangers. In particular I loved that they brought in Ayane to really give it a deeper tie to Higurashi as a greater franchise. (The best of these, of course, is Irregular Entropy)
Episode 4′s twist. Just... *chef’s kiss*. I know that people poked it apart and called it ridiculous after the fact but I don’t know if the feeling of dread when Rena’s eyes were hidden by shadow, and I realized that this wasn’t going to end well, is something I could ever really recapture.
Speaking of violence, the ending of Episode 13. The dull red light... the ringing bell... good stuff.
In retrospect, creating Tataridamashi by bringing in Minagoroshi was smart, specifically from a character-introduction standpoint. They needed to establish the existence of Kimiyoshi, Oryou and Akane for later parts of the story and dipping into Minagoroshi’s involvement of them is probably the easiest way to do it.
In general, Gou’s really smart about its character introductions. I didn’t think they’d bring in Akasaka but I’m honestly really pleased with how they did it.
SatoRika was confirmed! And was really cute... until it extremely wasn’t! (But in a good way!)
The fact that Satoko and Rika’s conflict at St. Lucia was so nuanced, with neither of them really being 100% right or 100% wrong. (Of course, this doesn’t last)
I might be slightly conflicted about Satokowashi as an arc, but none of those conflicts are with Eua. (The “FUCK YEAH FEATHERINE TIME” from Twitter was particularly tasty)
The dub! I know a lot of people are ambivalent towards the Gou dub but I for one am happy that we’ve got some great performances, as well as a Higurashi dub that’s actually good. Maybe not great, but far better than what DEEN got in the end.
This Shion face
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This is the face of someone that’s going to wreck her sister’s chances with her new boyfriend for fun.
What I Didn’t Like About Gou
Watadamashi in general. This is easily the weakest arc by a long shot, which sucks because I like Watanagashi-hen quite a bit. A lot of the time, it just felt like the animators had chose it as the place to cut costs. As good as the Takano scene in the Saiguiden is, it’s one of the things that makes the least sense in retrospect given the changes to Takano that have been established in Gou. And Episode 8 was rough both from a pacing and a what-happened standpoint. While Watadamashi had some great moments (the above Shion face as well as Rika dressing down Keiichi), overall it was clearly the weakest arc, particularly after Shion left the picture.
The pacing of Gou in general left something to be desired at times - they really should’ve shifted the extra episode in the first cour from Tataridamashi to Watadamashi, and Satokowashi could’ve probably condensed some of its episodes down and gave more room to other things, like...
Satoshi. He really shouldn’t have been as absent from the series as he was - hell, until Ep. 9 I legitimately thought that he might’ve been cut from the story altogether (and honestly, if they did that maybe the story would have been better!)
On that note, Episode 22 just kinda sucked in general.
While I’m not on the “where’s Shion” train as heavily as some meme artists are, I do think that the fact that she had to be written out of the second cour entirely to make it work is one of Gou’s story’s objective faults.
There’s a lot of little details added or addressed in Satokowashi-hen that I feel are either less than good, or are just restrictive. The big two of these is Satoko watching all of the fragments (either Eua should’ve just given her a sample platter, or we should’ve seen more of Satoko’s thoughts and reactions) and the fact that the memories returning means that eventually Hinamizawa would end up “solved” without Satoko’s intervention.
Honestly, Gou’s finale needed a bit more punch - it wasn’t bad but honestly even for a halfway point it could have ended with a bit more of a bang.
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The Fandom Side Of Things
First off, I want to preface this by saying thanks for following me, taking my theories into account (it always feels cool whenever I see something I threw into the aether in one of my Theory Times getting adopted and spread by someone else as an interesting idea!) and sticking with me through Gou and hopefully through Sotsu. You are all amazing and I love you all.
After Watadamashi concluded, I decided that my Higurashi bullshit needed its own sideblog, because I recognized that nobody in my other circles was even remotely into Higurashi and I didn’t want to shout into the void. So, I made myself a sideblog, named it after one of my favorite Higurashi console openings, and started posting my thoughts. Quickly I discovered a whole world of theories (”Satoko’s suspicious? I never would have thought of that!” - me, a young and naive fool), hot takes, and a surprising number of Rena kin. (Who are all delightful, I assure you!)
One of the things that stuck out to me was the different schools of opinion that formed. While I ended up as a relatively quiet analyst who overall liked Gou despite its flaws (a camp shared by two of my favorite blogs - @tarhalindur and @thewhitefluffyhat - that you need to follow if you don’t already), there were many others who had much stronger thoughts. Some of them were loudly cheering the story’s turns, while others seemed to decide that Gou could do no right and acted accordingly. Joining a Discord run by one of the larger Higurashi blogs on Tumblr gave me a live view of the process in Satokowashi’s later half, and it made me really realize what shaped people’s views on Gou. Some particular factors that caught my eye:
Whether or not they liked Umineko over Higurashi (mostly a Twitter element - the Umineko fans really enjoyed Eua making her appearance and overall reacted really positively to Gou)
Where they hailed from - honestly I think that Tumblr overall was one of the more positive fanbases for Gou (at least of the big concrete places like it and Reddit), given how the various camps thought of Gou’s eventual villain.
How they felt about Episode 16 - there were a lot of people that seriously felt that Rika learning the “lesson” of “maybe leaving the hometown where bad things happened isn’t the right call” was far, far more abhorrent and objectionable than the part where she got her entrails ripped out!
How they feel about Satoko, naturally - particularly, how much they sympatized with her and how much they didn’t want to see her go down the path she did. Tumblr in particular had a lot of people that related with her and her life situation, and it was never not interesting to see how the sympathy and occasional projection shaped someone’s particular thoughts. (There were some strong reactions to Gou showing an abuse victim becoming an even worse abuser, let me tell you.)
I think I’ll conclude these final thoughts by quoting my IRL best friend’s tags regarding the fandom of her choice:
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It really is. And I’m glad I got on this ride and saw it through with all of you.
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See you in July.
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beaniegyu · 3 years
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check in tag
tagged by @24hoursofdaisy thank you julia 💓
1. why did you choose your url?
i wanted something sangyeon related so i saved a few urls and ended up choosing the one i liked best, which meant i had to drop the def i had in it for two years haha 🙃
2. any side blogs? if you have them name them and why you have them.
oh, i've tried but it's just not something i can be consistent with. i enjoy having a mix of everything i like in here, even though this is first and foremost a kpop blog. i just don't like to limit myself or feel like i have log in a different blog to rb an aesthetic picture or a quote.
3. how long have you been on tumblr?
i made my first tumblr back in 2011, and i don't even know what the url was anymore. i remade a million times and was pretty active in my cinema blog until i dropped the whole content making thing and came back in 2019 with defsenses, which now has turned into my baby sangyus 💗
4. do you have a queue tag?
i don't. i don't queue often, either. i'm more of a "reblogs when she's online" kind of girl.
5. why did you start your blog in the first place?
i wanted to be active in the fandoms i was in and i never really vibed with twitter culture. i also wanted to make content again, and tumblr has always been my favorite platform.
6. why did you choose your icon/pfp?
because jae is my guy, my favorite kpop boy ever regardless of who i ult. does that make sense? it makes sense to me. he's just that special.
7. why did you choose your header?
because i finally have an ult line and i wanted everyone in it to be part of my header. i also wanted to have that quote from boys somwhere in my blog lmao.
8. what's your post with the most notes?
my got7 and seventeen netflix series.
9. how many mutuals do you have?
i don't know the exact number, but a lot of wonderful people who i love a lot.
10. how many followers do you have?
a lot more than i ever thought i would have, and close to my next milestone, so hopefully that happens some time this year.
11. how many people do you follow?
402 but something tells me a lot of people aren't active because there's no way i'm getting exposed to that many bloggers. i might need to go all marie kondo on it.
12. have you ever made a shitpost?
not as much as of late, but i surely used to before. i consider my tags shitposting though. wanna know what's in this dumb brain? read my tags 😇.
13. how often do you use tumblr each day?
i don't count at all. if i'm bored and creating content for it, then i can spend a few hours on here. if i'm too busy with work and life, then maybe like 10 mins before bed.
14. did you have a fight/argument with another blog once? who won?
nope. i've never had a fight with anyone, but i've received a couple of rude anons like most bloggers have at some point.
15. how do you feel about ‘you need to reblog this’ posts?
i feel like guilt tripping people into reblogging things isn't the way to go.
16. do you like tag games?
yes!!!!!!! i get to learn about my moots and also i get to talk about things i like, which i love.
17. do you like ask games?
absolutely. i feel like i haven't seen as many lately, but i love them.
18. which of your mutuals do you think is tumblr famous?
many of them have over 10k followers, so all of them i consider tumblr famous lol.
19. do you have a crush on a mutual?
i have a wife, which i think is better. she's @flowerbeom 💓
20. tags?
@jackbamiels @dustofinsanity @flowerbeom @hwiyoungies @shuaway @ljaebeom @wabisaba @bamshine @2-hyeon @xuseokgyu @haniehae @alrightyaphroditie @bubblebeom @soonhoonsol @swooyeon
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dansnaturepictures · 3 years
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08/06/21-Garden birds at home and more and Lakeside 
I was thinking last night that it didn’t feel like I’d taken many photos of the garden birds lately. I had less than a week prior but with me taking so many pictures daily currently including lots of the young birds at Lakeside in the week things that were quite recent can very easily seem a long time ago which shows I am having fun with time flying I believe. So it was fitting and maybe always obvious that today became a very memorable one for seeing and photographing birds in the garden or beyond the garden out the back whilst working. I took the first picture in this photoset of a Collared Dove on the roof opposite visible from my room. I also saw and photographed Woodpigeon and the possible young Feral Pigeon in the garden again as the day went on. And alongside House Sparrows picking at vegetation again and Starlings in great numbers, as well as Jackdaw out the back on the roof I very much enjoyed seeing my favourite garden bird the Goldfinch. And with the window opened as I worked at one point I loved hearing a Goldfinch belt out its strong, fluent and attractive call which was great to hear. When I was younger and I still have them at my Dad’s house where I grew up I had small RSPB cuddly toy figure of birds I did like my cuddly toys as a youngster that if you squeeze it, it makes the bird’s call. I had three, two of my favourite birds the Puffin and Osprey and famously within our family before my voice dropped the bird I screamed when I first saw along the road in 2007 the Goldfinch. So at a time I was still very much learning bird song it took us a while to learn it after getting into birdwatching to be honest I knew this one. But I don’t think I’ve often really took notice of a Goldfinch calling in real life so it felt great to hear this so purely. As I have done this year before it was interesting to see Woodpigeons menacingly approaching another on the roofs and making it fly off and Collared Doves would do it tonight too. 
I took the second and third pictures in this photoset of a lovely dog rose on the bush in the front garden which was lovely to see I saw my first one of the year on Thursday at Lakeside and saw roses on the bush yesterday I took a photo and tweeted it on Dans_Pictures of one this lunch time too so it was great to have the dog rose come on in the property now and the third photo is of daisies that had been around in the front garden as well which I’ve found quite notable in this little patch of quite well built garden and then I was thrilled tonight to notice some speedwell with it. A flower I’m used to seeing in the wild this family one of the big revelations of my year or so of really learning flowers now so this felt like a great and key garden moment this year. I walked through the estate a bit more before approaching Lakeside from the tarmac path north of it today. And right next to the roofs of the garages where I see them a lot I noticed a lovely group of House Sparrows. With angelic sunshine hitting their bright brown backs it made a great unique angle for photos and I took the fourth picture in this photoset as well as one I tweeted on Dans_Pictures of them. Photos I quite liked taking. There were so many sparrows around today bolstered by the youngsters probably and I saw a couple that appeared to be fighting sort of flying at each other and battling in the air going down near to a drain pipe. Interesting behaviour to witness. 
Walking down towards Lakeisde I loved coming across another patch of flowers in the urban area to the usual one I go to which I found with a few great species on Saturday night finding this lovely patch that evening too. Seeing cornflower and vetch there looking very colourful and bright I did love on Friday, but today I was thrilled to spot poppies of three colours traditional red, pink and red and white with the other flowers around nicely too and the poppies all looked enormous which was lovely to see. Here I loved spotting an electric looking Blue-tailed Damselfly which I enjoyed for a great few minutes on another very sunny and warm day I am having a great spring for them and I got the fifth picture in this photoset of one. I tweeted pictures of the poppies on Dans_Pictures tonight. 
Then it was into Lakeside to walk along the northern path, with a meeting at 2 not the most time spent at Lakeside on lunch as I lounged a bit before walking in my lunch hour. I took the sixth picture in this photoset going into Lakeisde a beautiful view with greenery and the sky. Then I tested myself to see if I could find the quite hidden bee orchid which I marveled at and did so much for me yesterday one of my most anticipated moments of the spring and greatest moments this year. And as I studied the long grassed fringes of this rich northern path I did after seeing the white flowers possible snowball flowers spot the glorious bee orchid. With my macro lens on in a two lens operation with the big lens this lunch time the sun went in just a little as I spotted this bee orchid again. I had anticipated I may hopefully see more bee orchids this year based on my experiences with them last year but I hadn’t really decided if I would take another picture of this one if I got the chance I was happy with the one of it yesterday. But with the sun slightly in it then created different light conditions to yesterday. So I went for it going for a different angle taking from the side rather than kneeling down on one knee to take it from the front as I did yesterday as well to yesterday and it meant after I had 10 exclusive pictures to Twitter in my Tumblr post and tweeted the bee orchid picture yesterday but today taking 31 photos so not having any exclusive ones it gave me a chance to put a bee orchid photo in a Tumblr photoset the seventh in this photoset. I enjoyed taking the eighth picture in this photoset going along the northern path of a really nice view and I liked hearing young birds chirping along the way which was nice. 
I took the final two pictures in this photoset at home tonight of a beautiful view out the back in a balmy evening with the grass and vegetation looking really nice. I did notice this and took a photo earlier but I felt it looked even more beautiful in the slightly more shadowy landscape of the early evening. The last photo is of a lovely sky scene out the back tonight. Out the front Blue Tit, Goldfinch and House Sparrow all kept me interested in the balcony feeders. whilst watching now BAFTA award winning Springwatch which I had been looking forward to congratulations to them on that award as I tweeted on Sunday its been so well deserved for so long for their consistent high quality broadcasts in all the watches from remote locations and hugely brilliant and inspiring content filmed, narrated and researched so well and at other parts of the evening. Also a very beautiful, big, bold and bright brown moth the Waved Umber flew in which looked stunning to watch and is camped at the top of our living room wall as I write this. I had just wondered in this warm weather when my moth season would kick start other than day flying ones which I’d seen this year already and it certainly has now.  I hope you all had a nice day.
Wildlife Sightings Summary: Tufted Duck, Lesser Black-backed Gull out the front nicely flying and on the green, Black-headed Gull well today, Blackbird well, Woodpigeon, Collared Dove, Feral Pigeon, Jackdaw, Starling, House Sparrow, Goldfinch, Blue Tit, Blue-tailed Damselfly, Waved Umber moth, spider and other insects in the house.
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smallnico · 4 years
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Are you a Gold Star lesbian? (Just in case you don't know what it means, a Gold Star lesbian is a lesbian that has never had the sex with a guy and would never have any intentions of ever doing so)
EDIT: i’ve been told this anon is a bot, and a lot of people have received this same message. who would program a bot to do this and why is a mystery to me. assuming no harm is done in doing so, i’m going to keep my response up instead of deleting it because i spent a good amount of time writing it, and i think it’s informative, which is why i wrote it in the first place.
~~~
i’m going to do you a favour here and assume you didn’t mean any harm by asking me this, that you just didn’t know better or didn’t think it through. i’ve said some pretty weird things to people on impulse, so i know how it feels when people react aggressively when you weren’t trying to insult them or freak them out or anything. normally, i would just block you for something like this and delete the ask, but given the number of asks i’ve been getting these days after a long drought of interaction, maybe it’s a good idea to re-establish some boundaries, not to mention explain to someone who might not know better why i have so many objections to the concept of a ‘gold star lesbian’.
first off, even when i’m hosting a frank discussion about sexuality on this blog, i never want to be asked about my sex life. some people are comfortable talking about theirs on tumblr -- i am not one such person. people are welcome to enjoy this blog and ask the occasional question, probe me for opinions, but my personal life is not open for spectators. there’s a meaningful difference between asking me about my sexual orientation and my experiences as a queer person, and asking me who i’ve had sex with. one is an opportunity for education, and the other is inappropriate and invasive. i’m already really dodgy about answering questions about my personal life, about friends and location and whatever, so already that ought to be a good warning to never ask me about my sex life. it is none of anyone’s goddamn business. this is a recipe for an instant block, and to restate, the only reason i’m not blocking this anon is because it’s a learning opportunity, and i’m feeling generous today.
the other reason i’m answering this question is because it’s an opportunity to save you, anon, from the trap of believing in ‘gold star lesbians’. i already know what the term means, and i’ve long since formed a firm opinion about its uselessness. 
1) a lesbian is not a better or worse lesbian for having/not having sex with men. there are a wide range of lesbian experiences that have room for a sexual history/future with men, and nobody -- absolutely nobody -- has the right to claim superiority over these people based on their comparatively “”pure”” sexual history. some lesbians formerly identified as straight, bi, pan, etc., and some may identify with those labels in the future. some older lesbians went their entire lives thinking they were straight, being married to men and having children before discovering who they are, does that make them less of a lesbian? does that make their current identity less qualified? i’ve been questioning my sexual orientation since i was thirteen years old, and not that it matters, but i don’t even identify as a lesbian anymore. am i tainted somehow? 2) let’s not pretend it’s not about purity, and let’s not pretend that purity means fucking anything when it comes to the spectrum of human experience. nothing is pure, nothing human will ever be pure, and anyone who claims their whatever the hell makes them pure is inflating their own pride at the cost of others they’ve arbitrarily declared are dirty. 3) men are not dirty. sex with men is not dirty. people who have sex with men are not dirty. you don’t get an award for not having sex with men, and the idea that ‘not having sex with men’ is a reward in and of itself is deeply unfair to both men and the people who find men attractive. there are a lot of excellent reasons people choose to have sex with men. the choice to have sex with men is not something i’m willing or even inclined to slander, even if the person making that choice is a lesbian, and even if they’re making that choice for pleasure.  4) sometimes, it’s not a choice. let’s not pretend rape in all its inglorious forms doesn’t count as sexual history, and hopefully we can all agree that, even if you’re 100% certain someone has never been raped, asking them to recount their sexual history to see if they qualify for some kind of honour is, at best, a rude and senseless violation of their privacy.  5) let’s also not pretend the concept of a ‘gold star lesbian’ isn’t borderline transphobic. i’ve seen a lot of people define ‘gold star lesbian’ as “a lesbian who has never touched a penis”, which naturally frames trans and some intersex women as dirty, while also discounting their womanhood. even if the term isn’t meant in a transphobic way, it has altogether too much flexibility as a concept for use by transphobic lesbians and terfs and not enough value in and of itself to bother reclaiming. 6) the label seeks to frame a specific lesbian experience as superior to any other experience, and does so at the expense of other queer people, and for what? is there a point to policing people’s identities and sexual experiences beyond “proving” one person is “”more queer”” than another? it’s ludicrous. it invalidates their experiences to make a select few people feel like they’re inherently better than everyone else, and i’m against that dynamic on principle. 7) if anyone thinks i’m reading too much into this, two things. one, it’s one of the only things my degree qualifies me to do, and two, just look at how the phrase ‘gold star lesbian’ is worded. you get a gold star. it’s a reward, an accomplishment, a sticker on your nametag, something which separates your from and prizes you above others because you did something good. in this case, ‘others’ is functionally everyone else in the queer community, and ‘something good’ is abstaining from sex with men. we’ve already been over why sex with men should never be seen as an inherently bad thing, and we as queer people should know better than to exclude each other for failing to conform to an arbitrarily ‘standard’ experience of sexuality.
i’m sure there’s more, but i’ve already spent enough time on this response. anon, if you’re reading this, it’s okay if you didn’t know better, and i hope i could teach you something today. i do get the feeling you asked this question in earnest, so as long as it doesn’t happen again (in which case, again, you will be blocked), no sour grapes. but to you and everyone else following this blog, this is an example of an inappropriate question -- for reasons on top of how many objections i have to the ‘gold star lesbian’ label. we have fun here on smallnico.tumblr.com, but i’m a real human being out there in the world, and this blog is my platform and spectacle, not me. there’s a reason i’m on tumblr and not twitter or instagram. 
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philosophy-juice · 3 years
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OMIGOSH @breadpunk7 i literally just saw this!!!!!!!! thanks for tagging me!! question time........
name/nickname: mya... can’t really do much with a three letter name (my middle name is rae tho and some people call me roo!)
gender: nonbinary (maybe genderfluid? not too sure about labels lately but it’s all good)
star sign: taurus sun, cap moon, sag rising
height: 5′4
birthday: may 5
time: 11:38 am aka i just woke up like an hour ago
favorite bands: ok HARD QUESTION but right now im listening to tons of taylor swift (cowboy like me and ivy have my entire heart), rilo kiley, liz phair (having a mid 90s moment i suppose), gorillaz (new album slaps), james blake, everything everything, georgia, joseph (THEYRE SO UNDERAPPRECIATED), xray spex, and the joy formidable.
favorite solo artists: ahhhhhh right now several of the people i mentioned above, also listening to lots of old blues and jazz artists like ella fitzgerald; hozier, marie-pierre arthur (she’s quebecois and her music is so pretty), and patti smith
last movie: fellowship of the ring for the nine millionth time, BUT i’ve been trying to find wolfwalkers cause i wanna watch it so bad..... i love cartoon saloon we stan small independent animation studios
last show: bridgerton, but only first ep so far
when did I create this blog: i’ve been on tumblr since like 2011 but i made this blog in...... 2016 i wanna say?
what do i post: who’s to say
last thing googled: adoption centres near my city cause my family’s trying to find a dog :))))
other blogs: @brushstrokebees my semi-cottagecore-y blog but it’s got a couple other things going on too and @garagesalerock where i [sometimes] make lyric edits [usually on request]
 do i get asks: sometimes!!
why i chose my url: dumb pun i drew in comic form in middle school about hitchhiker’s guide to the galaxy and me being in the midst of a semi-intellectual phase; it was a glass of orange juice and it said ‘philosophy juice - only 42 calories in every half glass’
following: 466 but ive been meaning to go through them all again cause lots are inactive/blogs about things im not into as much anymore (i think that also includes my other two blogs?? not sure)
followers: 89 heck yeahhh
average hours of sleep: anywhere from 4 to 10 on the average day, but when uni is going usually like 7/8
lucky number: probably 5!!
instruments: ive played piano for a super long time, same with alto saxophone all through school but i haven’t played since i graduated; i also play guitar (but still super rusty) and i sing a lot!! i’d like to learn viola or violin, bass, and some other kind of wind instrument
what am i wearing: booty shorts and a thrifted sweater...... and some space themed earrings i just got in the mail from a really cool artist i follow on twitter
dream job: published author!!!! that’s my dream. but i’m hoping to get some sort of career in conservation, climate change research, sustainable planning and development, or something in those realms since i’m getting my degree in environmental sciences and geography :))
dream trip: iceland!! and i’d also love to do a road trip up to the arctic circle here in canada. my other top places i wanna visit are argentina (esp patagonia, and taking a boat down to antarctica), taiwan with my best friend who’s from there, new zealand, turkey, greece, egypt, and way too many other places. also back to scotland cause hopefully i’ll be living there one day!
favorite food: anything that is pasta. i also love creme brulee (for a favourite dessert) and this thing called cranachan that’s like, whisky and raspberries and homemade whipped cream and oatmeal and it is. sublime. way too many other foods tho............ (if astrology isn’t real why am i a taurus that can’t stop thinking about food)
nationality: canadian
favorite song: oof yeah no can’t decide that but a top contender that i listened to for the millionth time this morning is all these things that i’ve done by the killers
last book read: reading the scottish boy by alex de campi and i am VERY MUCH enjoying it (there’s def some kinda iffy aspects to it, but it’s gorgeously written. and im a sucker for lgbtq historical fiction. so) it’s literally about a knight and his semi-squire in medieval britain who fall in love amidst political turmoil. the other book im in the middle of is gideon the ninth by tamsyn muir and if you’re reading this you’re now contractually obligated to read it. PLEASE IM SO ALONE AND IT’S A MASTERPIECE
top three fictional universes i’d like to live in: lotr, zelda, animal crossing...... anything where i can be freed from the chains of neo-liberal capitalism and maybe have some magic as a treat
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serpienten · 5 years
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Divine Intervention (II/VI)
Chapter Title: Three Time’s a Charm
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader
Summary: Could things possibly get any worse than a horrifyingly embarrassing meet-dumb with a handsome, flustering, and flirtatious stranger? Well – it probably will.
Last Chapter: In a sleepy haze, you almost steal someone’s car. Instead of being mad at you, he buys you coffee.
This Chapter: While working as a checkout girl, you’ve seen a lot of things. But you’ve yet to see a customer twice in one day. Or three times. Or... you get the gist.
Prompt: You’re the cute cashier at 7/11 and I keep going to buy one thing at a time as an excuse to talk to you.
Word Count: 1.7k
A/N: Part two for my series with @kentuckybarnes for @chillingbucky and @revengingbarnes ‘s fic wars! The prompt I had is listed above. I hope this is alright! As always, feedback, reblogs, likes, etc. are very very much appreciated.
Divine Intervention - Masterlist
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Two weeks had passed since you almost drove off in the car of one of earth’s mightiest heroes, and where you previously hadn’t paid much attention to either of them and had managed to live your days without seeing their faces plastered all over social media and what not, it seemed that you couldn’t escape them now. When you opened Twitter, almost every second tweet was about the Avengers or at least used a reference to them. You saw heaps of pictures on Instagram and neither on Pinterest or Tumblr were you safe from them. Well, from one of them especially. It didn’t exactly bother you. You had nothing against the Avengers, they seemed like nice people and of course, they’d saved the world and probably your ass more than once or twice, but by seeing Bucky Barnes’ face, you were constantly reminded of the embarrassment that had resulted from your sleepy mistake.
He was everywhere. Everywhere.
While he was absolutely gorgeous and muscley and overall just so. nice. to look at, he stressed you the heck out. He looked at you while getting you that coffee and you got flustered. You saw a picture of him looking into the camera and you blushed. And not only weren’t you safe from him in the social media space, but he also invaded your thoughts. His slate blue, one of a kind eyes, the smile and husky laugh he’d gifted you with a bunch of times, the way his shirt and jacket had stretched over his broad shoulders and the sculpted muscles of his chest, the slight stubble covering the sharp line of his jaw and his smell. Sandalwood, leather, cologne and just a hint of smoke that would normally have bothered you but on him... It fit. To Bucky, it fit perfectly. You hadn’t realized it like this while you were with him since you were tired out of your mind, but when you’d woken up the next day, it all came crashing down on you like a tsunami.
You desperately wished to turn back time and re-do your first meeting with Bucky. Partly because you wanted to embarrass yourself less, and partly to enjoy the time you had with that man more. Because as it was looking at the moment, you weren’t going to meet him anytime soon if ever at all. God, why hadn’t you asked for his number?
“C’mon Y/N, look alive.”
Tilting your head to the side, you looked at your co-worker, Alex. She was right behind you, handling the second cash desk, sliding products over the scanner nimbly and swiftly, checking out customer after customer, while you were waiting for an old lady to dig out her debit card. You grimaced at her and Alex grinned back at you, before looking back towards her customer.
When you turned back around as well, you were met with the lady’s debit card expectantly extended in your direction. Taking it quickly, you muttered out a thank you. While the woman packed her stuff and left, you got to the next customer. You could feel the people in the queue getting a little irritated by the wait, so you hurriedly greeted the next in line and reached for the three products on the counter. After swiping all of them over the scanner, you looked up and opened your mouth to announce the price.
Then, your breath stalled.
There he was. Bucky Barnes. The Winter Soldier. An Avenger. In a 7/11. Right in freaking front of you.
“Hey,” he said, giving you a lopsided grin and lifted his hand to wave a little.
“Hi,” you breathed out. 
He was wearing the baseball cap again. It suited him, but at the same time, it covered a lot of his face that you would really like to see. You allowed your eyes to roam over his form. All in all, he didn’t look very different from the last time you saw him, and that was just fine by you. 
“So, how much is it?”
“Hm?” Your eyes snapped back up to his and you looked at him wide-eyed, before realizing that you were in the middle of “checking out” a customer and had a line of people that were starting to switch over to Alex because of how long you were taking.
“Crap,” you swore, “sorry.”
Bucky let out a little, hoarse laugh and shook his head. “It’s fine, doll.”
You let him know the price and he took out a black credit card to pay. The look of the card alone made you feel strange about seeing it in a 7/11 like the one you worked in.
“Well,” he said, grabbing the cans of root beer, “it’s really... really nice to see you again.”
“You too.” You smiled at him, fiddling around with your fingers as you looked at him. He wore a soft smile that almost made your knees weak. The embarrassment you’d felt the past two weeks while thinking about him and the car incident disappeared immediately as soon as your eyes met. All you could think about was how good it felt to have him in front of you. It felt like being near a close friend. Comfortable. Familiar. Relaxed.
A chuckle stole its way onto his lips and you were hoping for him to say something else, but just when he was about to open his mouth, someone behind him cleared his throat.
You were met with the glare of a very, very angry man, a hand stemmed in his hips and his foot audibly tapping below the counter.
Bucky threw a glance over his shoulder and then looked back at you with an apology shining in his eyes. “I’ll leave ya to it, doll.”
You nodded at him, waving slightly as he turned and left. However, not without shooting you another smile. Already, not even two seconds later, you were yearning for him to return.
Two hours later, the lunchtime storm was over, and you could finally take a deep breath again. Alex and you were sitting in your little space between the cash registers, slouched in your seats.
“So. Tell me. Who was the guy you were making heart eyes at?” Alex asked, a cheeky, teasing undertone to her voice. 
Bucky. You could feel your cheeks heat again, coloring in a rosy shade. Damn it. Damn Bucky. You tried to scoff and brush her comment off by brushing your hair back over your shoulder nonchalantly. “I don’t know what the hell you’re talking about. I wasn’t making heart eyes at any guy.” You made a show of looking down at your nails before your brows furrowed. “Also, you were sitting with your back to me. How did you even...” you trailed off, biting your tongue. You’d almost said too much. Maybe you already had.
Alex laughed and shook her head, her shoulder length, brown curls flying into her face. Lifting her hands, she brushed the strands out of her face. “Oh, please. You were staring him down and he held up the entire line because of it. I noticed that even with my back turned to you. And you know why? Because you gave me a whole lotta work. At least he was nice to look at when I turned around to reprimand you.”
“Why didn’t you? Reprimand me, I mean?” You cocked an eyebrow at Alex.
“Because he was nice to look at. Really nice,” she said, shrugging. “I understood.”
Breathing in deeply, you chuckled lightly and rolled your eyes. “You’re awful.”
“Oh, come on. I’ve been your friend since what, four years? The guys you’ve gone out with since I’ve known you have sucked. Sucked, Y/N. And this one’s delicious. And he’s into you too.”
You scoffed at that. “I’m not gonna go out with him. Nothing’s gonna happen. And he’s not into me. Nothing is going to happen. Zip. Nada.”
She raised an eyebrow at you, grinning. “You sound disappointed.”
“Alex-”
“Hey.”
You almost hit your head on the shelf next to the cash register when you whipped around in your chair. Damn it. Damn Bucky.
“Hi.” You pushed out a breath.
He grinned. “Déjà-vu?”
Your lips pulled wider into a grin that mirrored his. “Did you forget something?”
Bucky nodded, pointing at the bags of chips laying on the counter. “Night out with the guys. Can’t forget the snacks.”
Looking at the three bags, a crease formed between your brows. “How many guys are we talking? Because I’m not sure that’s enough.”
“Do you want me to buy more?”
“Do you want to eat more?”
Bucky rolled his eyes, a playfulness evident in the movement. “I’m good, dollface.”
You lifted both your hands and shrugged. “If you say so.”
He chuckled. You swiped the bags and told him the price. Again, he pulled out the black card and paid.
“Uh...” you said, “It was nice to see you. Again.”
“Yeah, yeah it was. Again.” The bags crackled as he picked them up and paused. He opened his mouth and closed it again. “Y-” he started, cutting himself off. “Yeah. I’ll see ya, doll.”
You nodded as you watched him turn around again. Just like the first time, more than anything you wanted to call him back and keep talking to him. And you almost did, ready to open your mouth and call out. But you didn’t. Because when Bucky was hardly five feet away from you, Alex behind you scoffed. “Yeah. You’re so not into each other. Doll. Dollface. Sweetiepie. Honeycak-”
“Alex,” you hissed, a scandalized expression on your face. Had he heard her? God, hopefully not. Please, not.
She rolled her eyes. “Whatever.” A moment passes before she speaks up again. “Whatever.”
You slumped back down into your chair and propped up your elbows on the checkout counter and rested your chin on your hands.
Not even five uneventful minutes pass before Alex nudges you roughly. “Y/N! Y/N, look.”
When you turned to look at you, she grabbed the back of your chair and twirled you around to the direction of the entrance.
You let out a surprised breath. “As if.”
You watched Bucky as he walked towards the Chips Aisle, picked up a bunch more bags and came towards the checkout counter for a third time in three hours. When he arrived in front of you, you couldn’t help but say something.
“You do seem good.”
Bucky shook his head, rolling his eyes and grinning in the process.
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mysticsparklewings · 4 years
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NaPoWriMo 2020 Day 24: Fruit of Choice
spherical black voids hanging from ominous red vines leaves just as green pluck one, watch it bleed a taste tart and poison yet they grow like weeds ____ So today's prompt was fairly simple; Describe a fruit of your choice. At first, I was overwhelmed by options, as there are a fair amount of fruits I like that could've chosen to write about, but me being me I did want something slightly more interesting and deep than just describing the deliciousness of a nice hard Pink Lady apple or the fresh sweetness of a firm kiwi. And then I remembered a deceptive little thing that is a fruit by way of technicality; meaning this is one plant part you wouldn't want anywhere near your plate. The little monsters are known as Pokeberries/Pokeweed or Inkberries. As the poem says, they grow without much prompting in a weed-like fashion in more rural areas. The berries themselves are indeed as black as ink, growing on deep reddish-pink vines with yellowy-green leaves like you might find on a number of other less dangerous plants. If you pick a few berries off one of the sparse but grape-like smaller vines,  you'll probably notice immediately the vibrant, pinkish juice they produce. And if you were to pop one in your mouth, which you should not do, you'd be greeted by a strange kind of tart flavor that bites your tongue and would be considered unpleasant by most, though tart-lovers may find it endearing in its own way. Now, why do I know so much about how Pokeberries taste despite saying twice now that you shouldn't eat them? Funny story about that... I ate them a lot as kid, actually. I should probably be dead. (And for the record, I don't eat them anymore, now that I know better, nor do I condone doing so just because I got extremely lucky.) I live out in the middle of nowhere and have all my life. We have Pokeweeds all over in the Summer. I learned about the berries from my dad, who thought they were Elderberries. He would eat them sometimes, and I tried them and liked them. I would go pick little vines full of them and eat a good handful or so at a time some days. I never got sick, never felt ill afterword. The only ill effects I ever felt was that once or twice when I'd get a lot of the juice on my hands, my hands would be a little itchy. Which is a known and expected side effect, better known as "contact dermatitis." That's it. (Well, and some of my bathroom trips would be tinted purple later, but that wasn't any more concerning than a lot of vegetables tinting said trips green.) It wouldn't be until a couple of years ago that I looked up elderberries when someone asked me in a conversation if they were poisonous (short answer: Technically no.) and I saw the pictures and realized those were not the berries I'd happily eaten over the years. So, naturally, I jumped down the rabbit hole to figure out what I actually had been eating. Imagine my horror to find out I'd consumed a good amount, year after year as a small child, of berries that for all intents and purposes should've at least made me sick, if not actually killed me. After some deeper research, the best answer for why I am still alive comes in the form of, as far as I can tell, the poison in the berries is mostly in the seeds. (Although I'm still not completely sure what kind of poison it is, if it has a name besides "Pokeberry Seed Poison") And also from what I can tell, the seeds are so hard/thickly coated, much like Rosary Peas which contain abrin, that they usually can't be chewed open and aren't easily broken down in the digestive system. Moral of the story: Be extremely careful in identifying edible and non-edible plants in your yard before eating them or encouraging others to do so. Just because I got very lucky and didn't die doesn't mean there isn't real danger lurking there. After all that, I think it's fairly obvious why I chose these sneaky berries as my subject for today. It still baffles and amazes me to this day that I survived unscathed with how many of those I ate as a small child. It fascinated me that by all accounts on the internet they're so dangerous and yet...here I am, typing this very story. This isn't the most exciting "hey guys wanna hear about how I should be dead right now," story on the planet, but I think it's pretty compelling, all things considered. I think having described the berries probably explains more of the mandala, too. I had the immediate idea of making the main motif modeled after the little berry vines with accents here and there for the leaves and roots, and some for the juice. Which I honestly think would make for gorgeous use in dyes or pigments--I can't emphasize enough how pretty of a color it is, and I have no gel pen currently at my disposal that can mimic the color properly, but I did my best here. Same with the vines, actually. I used my "black" Sparkle Pop that shows up more as the rich red glitter in the ink, but it's still a bit dark and missing a hint of purple to accurately portray the Pokeweed vines. I hope we all enjoyed that surprisingly dark trip down memory lane.  At the very least, as scary as it is in reality, thinking of what could have happened, it does make for a good story and something to halfway-laugh about now. Hopefully, tomorrow's prompt will be something that just as easily comes to me and won't also be poison hiding in plain sight.  6 more days to go! ____ Artwork/Poem © me, MysticSparkleWings Inspired by FridgePoetProject ____ Where to find me & my artwork: My Website | Commission Info + Prices | Ko-Fi | dA Print Shop | RedBubble |   Twitter | Tumblr | Instagram
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rkyooa · 5 years
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damn, rookies.
okay children, here we go.
i’m putting this under a read more cause, well, this isn’t going to be completely positive, in fact it’ll probably be a good 50/50 positive and negative. we’ve been asked to write about rookies for this fifth year anniversary. it’s amazing that this rp has lasted so long and seems to be the only active, successful roleplay on tumblr to have any kind of significant longevity, so i feel it’s only right to be honest when writing this. rookies has done a lot for me, and this includes both positive and negative things. each person’s experience is different, some will have really great experiences and some will have really negative ones, some will fall on the spectrum in between. i’m definitely in between. i’m gonna do this in a ‘rookies has taught me blank’ kind of way, just so that i can keep a silver lining in the picture, even with the negative. if you relate, then great, let’s chat and bond over it. if not, i hope my experiences help you so you don’t have to go through any of the same hardships i have. 
here we go
rookies has taught me resilience. it’s the first thing that comes to mind, because as much as this community has some amazing people who are supportive and uplift others, there is some really toxic stuff that has happened within the walls of this roleplay. sometimes it’s out of our control, and bad stuff just happens, and that’s okay, so long as we pick ourselves up, dust ourselves off, and move on. upon joining rookies, i had made yooa and hugo. hugo was a muse already conjured and in the works before he had officially joined, and he was in all honestly, made specifically for a friend’s muse here. yooa was plotted to have a long term ship from the get go as well, and both ships were integral parts of their muses. i lost both of them, nearly at once, and it quite literally took a chunk out of me. i never blamed the roleplayers for doing that, because i understood why they needed to leave. getting upset at them wouldn’t have changed anything either, so i just accepted it. i won’t say i didn’t suffer from it though, because i most certainly did. for a while i had no idea what to do with hugo. yooa, she had a bit of a purpose, because she wanted to be a model and an idol, but hugo especially was so hard to come back from on. failed ships or people leaving happened multiple times after that as well, but because of the initial loss of people i thought would never leave, the impact wasn’t nearly as bad, i was able to weather it and accept it, and move on ic. now i’m so understanding and don’t really get hurt when i lose ships or rp partners, i’m able to just be okay with it and look forward to the next ship or thread or endeavour. i’ve applied this to strictly ooc things as well. i’ve lost friends within rookies. people have stopped talking to me because of things that have happened concerning rookies. it sucks, i don’t like it, but i accept it. i’m becoming more and more thick skinned and level headed by the day. i can take blows and dish back kindness now, and i’m pretty proud of that. the only thing i’m still struggling with is the amount of netizen smack talk or belittling that suho got during the mgas. everyone loved to hate him, and while it’s just unofficial ic stuff, it did still get to me, hence why i stopped writing on my own netizen (and have since even deleted her account). the reason that specifically got to me is very unique to my situation. yooa and hugo got signed after what’s considered pretty long waits. there have been longer, obviously, but 8 and 6 months is still pretty long. they were both signed quietly as well, and haven’t had any special trainee projects or debut notices or anything like that, they’ve simply had their training as private trainees and that’s been it. i’ve never complained about that, because i get that others have been here longer than me, are more deserving of the spotlight, or sometimes that’s just how the cookie crumbles. i had a third muse before suho that was taking even longer to get anything. she had an audition with kt that failed, that’s about it, and i had had her for a pretty long time (rip rkyukji i miss you terribly but your true fc is dead and reubvleiwubds i just can’t play you cause of it otherwise you’d still be here kicking ass and taking names). now, she didn’t get scouted with chococon and i did complain about that, but in retrospect i realized her charisma was way too low to be street casted hence why i made suho with his insane charisma level and percentage.
CHARISMA IS THE MOST IMPORTANT SKILL, ROOKIES TAUGHT ME THIS, IT’S THE ONLY REASON SUHO WON AND IF YOUR MUSE HAS LOW CHARISMA YOU BETTER FIX THAT OR YOU’LL BE WAITING AGES AND AGES TO GET SCOUTED AND ONLY KT WILL TAKE YOU. LITERALLY LEARNED THAT ON YUKJI AFTER READING AN OLD POST ABOUT WHICH SKILLS EACH COMPANY SCOUTS. 
anyways, suho doing well on the mgas and winning was the very first time any of my muses had ever been in some kind of spotlight, really. for the first time ever i was genuinely being rewarded, and everyone was just shitting all over it. had yooa or hugo gotten something special i probably wouldn’t have cared that the netizens were always like ‘idk why suho is special, what’s with this junmyeon guy, he aint even talented, he’s not that good looking, etc.’ but because it was the first time something special was being done for me as a mun here, i took it to heart. it was like i wasn’t allowed to enjoy it, because someone else’s muse wasn’t the one in the spotlight. i still remember waiting up until 5am to see who the winner was, and when it came down to suho and haknyeon the tlist blew up with support and rooting for haknyeon, and then when suho was announced the winner? dead silence. i had never felt so hated within this roleplay before, and i felt the need to say sorry for him winning. bianca worked very hard to give all of us, and me, a very special experience, and all i could feel was remorse and regret by the end of it, which i’m sure wasn’t her intention. carly mentioned not understanding why i thought everyone hated suho - this is why. the moment one of my muses had some kind of attention or spotlight, people were mad, upset, whatever. it... really sucked. i feel really anxious and nervous whenever i mention his mga win in a thread now cause i’m worried i’m upsetting someone with it. i still have to work on this, but hopefully i become resilient to this too. i’m sure, if and when yooa or hugo becomes public or debuts, that the netizens will have things to say about them as well, and i just have to be prepared for it to be bad. people will be petty, they’ll be mean, it’s just how life is sometimes. all i can do is correct my own ways and try to build up a thick skin to it.
rookies has taught me dedication. a bitch has done her trainee replies and evals on all three muses every single week since each other has been signed. that’s right, i do fucking 6+ replies a week, every week. that’s sort of unheard of (except for kyle lol) and it’s shown me my unhealthy level of perfectionist tendencies i have, haha. my non-trainee threads have really fallen to the wayside, which sucks and i need to fix that, but after i’m done all of my trainee replies i’m just so tired. i’ll work on it, i promise, but a bitch is tired she does her replies every week cause she won’t be able to sleep if she misses an opportunity for an achievement she wants. i have goal pages set up on each muse that shows which achievements and what levels i want for them. i update them with my point pages every week, and boi there’s a LOT on there that i want to do. missing a week? it makes me panic because that’s another week on top of everything that i’ll need to get my muses where i want them. the fact that suho is so chillaxed about his training and debuting helps so much because my perfectionist ways reflect in yooa and she will literally murder me if i miss a week on her. i also started an rkresource thing (that i desperately need to update) and even though the mods probably have their own version of it i still kind of like seeing where everyone is at. i’ve got some competitiveness in my personality so part of me really wants to see my muses raise in rank in some areas. it kind of keeps me motivated? and i hope that it does for other people as well, haha. it’s not pinned to my twitter anymore but i think someone posted a link to it in the rkresource tag so! its the leaderboard doc. i also update my points every week cause i need to know where my muses are at, which apparently is also really rare? not even kyle does that lol but i know if i leave it i’ll get lost and mess up the tracking so it’s really just for my own sake of being bad with numbers. i lowkey add everything up now and then to make sure i’m on the right track. 
rookies has taught me how to keep muse. yooa is my longest running muse by far. not many know this, since i’ve been around nearly two years now, but i’m actually notorious for getting bored and losing interest in a muse. i’ve had a lot of muses in my time, more than 100, or even 200 at this point. they always sort of completed their story though, and i’d get so bored on them that i’d go inactive or drop them. these muses in rookies have goals, purposes, aims, and they don’t die. yooa is such a strong muse, as is hugo (suho is eh tbh but he’s there), and i know there’s still so much more for her to do and accomplish, so many paths to explore, and i deeply thank rookies for giving me a place where i can have two whole muses who refuse to die no matter what. that’s such a rarity for me, so thank you rookies. you’ve given me two very precious muses that i love with all my heart. no matter what happens ooc with other muns or even the mods, my love for these two muses keeps me from leaving and dropping, i could never do it.
rookies has taught me loving friendships. i have met some very special people here. they are few, honestly, but they are gems and i would never have known them without rookies. the person who has impacted me the most, honestly, is clara @rkwendy / @rkjohnny. this girl, i don’t think you guys realize how beautiful of a person she is. we aren’t best friends, but we’re close. clara has listened to me bitch, both about real life and things within rookies, even people she cares about, and she has not left my side or held anything against me. there are so few people in this world that could do that. she didn’t even push me to like anyone she liked, she let me realize my faults and errors on my own and she was supportive and proud when i realized them and voiced that to her. i try my best to be there for her as well, but i don’t know if i’ll ever be able to be there for her the way she has for me. i’ve got an extremely beautiful ship with her as well, that i hold near and dear to my heart, because as mentioned before i get bored easily, so doing slow burn ships has never been my forte, but wendy is just such a beautiful, layered, intriguing masterpiece of a muse that hugo and i fell completely in love and have been hooked ever since a year ago when the burn first started. it doesn’t matter how fast or slow the replies come, the muse is still there and strong for the ship and i am so thankful to her for being an amazing writing partner. another friendship that has impacted me, and i dont think she even knows or realizes this, is rose @rklisa / @rkyeri / @jinsoulrk. we started out really rocky, and we had some issues that were a good chunk my doing. literally, i came at her over the pettiest, stupidest thing (and i realized she was even right to begin with lol i was such a dumb ass), and then there were things ic that i was taking to heart ooc and it became an ooc issue. i didn’t really handle that well either. the reason i’m mentioning this is because it taught me to see my own faults and own up to them, and even try to change them. if i hadn’t been dumb, rose and i would’ve probably started getting along a loooooong time ago, cause the ironic thing is she and i like a lot of the same groups and share a lot of the same opinions both on irl groups and songs, and ic and ooc rookies things. i’m very excited to be among the new gen royal girls with her and to hopefully have our muses (WHO ARE FINALLY GETTING ALONG! YAY!) debut together one day. that’s obviously way off since luxe debuted this year, but eventually it’ll happen, and i look forward to the queens of sexy concepts yooa and lisa owning the stage together. i’m not mentioning many people because i don’t think there’s a need to. i’m just singling out people who have impacted me and taught me things (minus the mods, that’s sort of their job when muns go astray. thank you carly @taeminrk, lol, you taught me a valuable lesson too when i came at you over something i shouldn’t have and i still regret that to this day. i appreciate you forgiving me for that.) i will also mention ani @rkmiya / @rkmin / @rksohee / @rkchungha because she helped me through a really tough time when i was triggered (unintentionally) by someone in a group chat. we bonded a lot through that, and she’s been there to listen to me rant and complain ever since, haha. she also made me feel very welcome when hugo first joined nova, she hyped me so much and it meant the world to me because it made me feel like people were excited to have me around and to roleplay with me. i had heard horror stories about nova so i was really scared when i decided to have hugo sign. i was tweeting out ‘anything but nova’ during that whole thing but then he got nova and i wanted to cry, die, and pee myself at the same time. i ended up deciding to go for it (it’s only TWO YEARS LOL) and it ended up being the best decision ever. i started off on the right foot though and that’s all thanks to ani. i owe her big time for that. lastly, i’ll mention nic @rknahee / @rkjei / @rkobon. why, you ask? because she has restored my faith in people being trustworthy. especially recently, rookies was teaching me not to trust people. i’ve been very vocal about not being okay as of late, but people kept taking me for granted and just doing whatever they wanted and expecting me to still be there at the end of it no matter what they did. it’s been getting really tiresome and annoying, especially when those people get shocked and upset when i finally put my foot down and express my hurt. nic has taught me that there are people out there who genuinely care and will be there, and can be trusted. she’s gone through similar things to me with other muns, so maybe we’re both just jaded and tired and we can’t be bothered and that’s why we get along so well and trust each other so much. there are days where i wish i could take all of her pain and just put it on myself so she can smile and be happy and not worry about anything. she’s a genuine sweetheart and whoever comes for her will feel my wrath!!! i love her a lot, and always will <3 there are some people i’ve known since before rookies who are still my good friends now. lyn @rkxsnn / @rkavery (your damn urls i swear to god), jen @yujurk, and stef @rkohsehun, don’t think i forgot you guys. i love you to the moon and back. lyn is my ride or die, soulmate, best friend. jen is someone who reteaches me the value of not giving a shit all the time. stef is my fucking wIFE and i will mURDER for her. y’all are great, mwah, i love you <3
[[ amendment! i can’t believe i didn’t mention kyle @haseulrk / @seulgirk / @rksejeong. probs cause you’re a mod too and i was trying to stay away from that cause i don’t want to seem kiss ass LOL but you’ve been a wonderful friend that has taught me it’s okay to rely on people sometimes. i want you to know you can always rely on me too, whenever you need it. you’re a candle in the darkness, with you there will always be light <3 ]]
rookies taught me anxiety. aight, now here’s some of the nasty negative stuff i was talking about. rp in general has given me anxiety, something i never had or experienced before it. rookies festers it a lot, sometimes to an unhealthy point. i can’t help it, rookies is part of me now, i’ve invested so much time and effort into this place, so i can’t leave, even when the place is literally affecting my health. it sucks when i need an escape from all the bs happening in real life, and then i come here and it’s just more stress and hurt, and that’s when the anxiety rolls in cause then i no longer have a safe space. that’s just not the point of rookies, and i doubt the mods want that to be the case for anyone. it’s just tough when there are people i know i won’t ever get along with here, people i know who don’t like me for whatever reason (and still hold a grudge to this day even though they talk about how people shouldn’t hold grudges) or stuff like what happened with suho in the mgas happens, and i can’t do anything about it. mods can only do so much too. i kind of just expect people to not like me at this point? and i worry myself into a place where i feel like the whole world is against me. it’s super unhealthy, but honestly i don’t know how to fix it, it is what it is. it’s a part of me and my rookies experience, and it probably always will be, so like a lot of other stuff i just have to accept it. there are muns that i’m trying to get on better terms with and i hope i get good outcomes like i did with rose (she made the first step though i don’t take credit for that). for some of them, though, it’s very clear there’s just no reconciling, or their personality will just always clash with mine and there’s nothing to be done about it. all i can do is stay civil and keep striving for better outcomes. and i gotta remember to breathe. 
rookies has taught me clarity. i’m way better at seeing where i’m going wrong now. within the past year i notice that when i’m upset i’ll go and bitch in a safe space, or at least what i think is a safe space, but when that person i bitched about bitches about ME and it gets back to me i’m upset about it. kind of hypocritical, and i realized it. so i don’t hold grudges or confront or anything. everyone gets annoyed with people whether they’re close or not, and bitching about them sometimes doesn’t mean we hate them or they hate us. we just gotta VENT sometimes, you know? in retrospect i know i’ve come off as two-faced in some situations, but i’ve learned my personality really well and i know that if i want to tackle a situation with a level head and clarity, i need to blow off the steam out loud elsewhere first. i need to yell to someone who is impartial and won’t lecture me so i can get that off my chest, then go to the person in question and be calm when talking things out with them. in the moment clarity and level-headedness is slowly but surely starting to come as a result of this, and it’s mostly been situations in rookies that has taught me this. 
i keep rambling on and on, this post has been super huge haha, but i guess the main point i’m making is that rookies has taught me a lot of self growth. am i perfect? nope, and to paraphrase a recent conversation with my dear mother, i don’t want to be perfect, i have flaws and i like them, but i also am proud of the person i am becoming. if you hate me or dislike me, that’s perfectly fine, if you like me or love me, that’s fine too. if you’re indifferent, great! lol. rookies has taught me to accept all of it. it’s kind of sucky that rookies has taught me to just accept all the bullshit in life, but in a setting like this it’s hard to escape all of our flaws being concentrated and emphasized here. muses are a part of us and it gets pretty sensitive. having everything so concentrated and intense here, though, has taught me to be more resilient and accepting, and i get to apply that to real life. it’s also made me pessimistic, and to paraphrase a recent conversation with my asshole brother (who is super slytherin and waayyyy more optimistic than i am, and i’m a freaking gryffindor and pessimistic af, who is the real set of good guys rowling? i’m also a ravenclaw though so maybe that’s got something to do with it lol) that makes me dead wrong and i need to look into that, cause everyone inherently wants to do good. i wish i could see things like my brother lol but i’m jaded. one more thing to work on? maybe next year i’ll be more optimistic. if you’ve read all of this, holy hell go get a life friend, but thanks! let’s chat and plot sometime, because we all know rookies aint going anywhere~
sincerely, roe
@rkyooa / @rkhugo / @suhork
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unofferable-fic · 5 years
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Submission from literalapologyblog + some thoughts re: GOT/Marvel/writing
“(too long for askbox, so sending as submission)
Hey, I left a dickish comment on a post you made (via defunct blog, “beewinged”), and I’m sorry. I just literally created a whole new account and painstakingly tracked down your url again to say that, because it was bugging me that much.
I was really into fandom and tumblr for a few years, and pulled out of it completely when one particular fandom went sour with drama and hatefulness. Hate directed at showrunners, between fans– a lot of it using the guise of progressive language.
I removed myself from fandom and social media entirely and pretty successfully, because I hate communicating with people in soundbites and hate how communities like tumblr (for all their upsides) make it easy for users to “curate” a personality and set of opinions with the click of a button.
And it took all of a few days scrolling the Endgame tag for me to go right back to a place of casual, de-personalizing interactions (two comments, the other one being, “this take bums me out”– but still two comments too many).
I saw about fifty posts that compared Endgame to GoT S8; yours wasn’t that unusual. Tags on tumblr, by design, highly concentrate extreme emotion and stimulus. Social media doesn’t care what it’s doing to compassionate discourse. Rationally, I know this! – but seeing post after post talking about writers and creatives, human people with families, as if they had committed war crimes– seeing “fuck the Russos”, “these writers are basically the same people as these writers”, treating “the Russos” like some kind of malicious entity or, worse, seeing anti-colonialist director of color Taika Waititi referred to as “a bag of racid dicks” (in the name of protecting the integrity of a made-up person) made it all too easy for me to perceive individual posts as a part of a vicious hivemind obsessed with its fandom reality-bubble.
I think there are some good criticisms of Endgame. I also felt and still feel that the writing in Endgame (flawed but thematically consistent, focuses on Tony’s arc to the exclusion of others, because his– for better or for worse– is the strongest) doesn’t bear comparison with the hasty and thoughtless writing of GoT’s last few episodes.
That opinion is not what I expressed in my comment on your post. I wasn’t starting a conversation in good faith (something I’ve tried very hard to hold myself to, in real life and when I do make posts online). I essentially expressed, “*you*, a part of a hivemind, are mad because the thing you wanted didn’t happened, and *you* are fronting like that’s ‘bad writing’”.
That’s a very personal accusation, and a really incendiary and unfair thing to say to someone on the basis of one post, ever if it reflects a generalized feeling I have about online fandom. I let my momentary irritation get the better of me, and focused it on you. It wasn’t the most unkind thing I’ve ever said, but that doesn’t rankle any less.
So: I’m sure you do have strong feelings about stories and opinions about storytelling, and I’m sure they are worth listening to, that you have people in your life who enjoy hearing your thoughts, and that the best and most complex of your thoughts can’t be gleaned from just scrolling through your tumblr.
You might have a thicker skin than I do, and maybe didn’t give my comment a second thought– but I’m sorry if, for even a second, it made you feel dismissed or hurt or misunderstood. You could be any number of people who, in “real” life, I’d never speak to so dismissively. I hope you continue to write, enjoy and engage with stories.”
First off, I want to apologise for taking a few days to post this. I saw this in my submission box and wanted to thoroughly think over it before I replied. I’ve since seen that the blog has been deactivated, but I wanted to post this in the hopes you might stumble across my response, because I do appreciate you going to the effort to find me again… It’s a serious effort! And rarely do people apologise for ‘dickish’ comments haha
First off, I understand anyone who wishes to take time away from fandoms, especially when things get toxic and experiences get ruined by it. For me personally, I have a tendency to just avoid those blogs/tags. There was certain things I don’t go near, and certain posts that I might read, internally disagree with, and move on. I’ve spent a lot less time on Twitter and Instagram lately, and I’m feeling better for it too.
In short, do I think that there are rightful comparisons to make between the writers at Marvel and GOT? Yes. Do I think that makes it okay for us to talk excessive smack about the Russos/TW? No. While my criticisms for the Russos and TW run deep, I never condone death threats or unnecessary insults. On one post in particular, I’ve ‘gone off’ on some comment the Russos made regarding fan reactions to Loki’s death. Nothing other than calling them ‘fucking eejits’, but cursing is used more casually here in Ireland, so maybe that’s why I use it as such. But yeah, other than that, I don’t agree with the notion of wishing death or serious harm on these people, and I think most people would agree with that. Criticise them all day, if it’s valid, but anything else is a bit… excessive. I certainly do think that there are far more valid criticisms floating about instead of death threats, but the harsh stuff is always going to jump out the most.
I agree with a lot of what you say - while there are definitely valid criticisms to be made about Endgame, it’s not an awful or bad film, and there are definitely more examples of poor and lazy writing in the last season of GOT. As someone who was in love with that show for a good five seasons, it was sad to see it go the way it did. I did, however, jump ship after some very telling and dramatic writing choices they made in season five. By my logic at the time, “if they will do x now, they’ll most definitely do y and z later”, and it’s never fun when that realisation comes to fruition. That being said, I still strongly believe that Marvel dropped the ball with some of my favourite characters in Endgame (Loki, Steve, Tony, Bucky, Thor). I think they did great by some characters, and terrible by others. But that’s probably a discussion for another post - most of my feelings have been far better explained in posts by other blogs!
“I essentially expressed, “*you*, a part of a hivemind, are mad because the thing you wanted didn’t happened, and *you* are fronting like that’s ‘bad writing’”.” If I’m being honest, this is absolutely nothing new to me haha. As a Loki fan and someone quite critical of the last season of GOT, I’m well used to people telling me “you’re just mad because your fave died!” and “you just don’t like it because it’s not the ending you wanted!” I think any Loki fan can attest to that too. It sucks, but if someone replies to me in that way, I don’t even bother continuing the conversation. You’ve already reached a wall before the conversation can start. I recently had a chat with a friend who I falsely assumed would cut me off in a similar manner, and it was amazingly refreshing to have my opinion heard and not automatically shut off because I’m a “Loki fangirl”. For me, Endgame just proved that my favourite character’s ending in IW was badly written, badly executed, pointless other than being motivation for Thor, and just overall illogical and out of character. Much like most Dany fans don’t mind her character becoming a mad queen, I don’t mind if Loki dies. My issue is how we get there and how badly executed it was in terms of writing. The actors themselves obviously put their hearts into what I would consider a weak story point. It seemed careless, much like Dany’s characterisation... “How do we get there exactly? Ah, who cares, just do it and get it over with. People will watch it and we’ll make money anyway.”. Can you imagine if they had screwed up Iron Man’s arc in the same manner? The backlash would’ve been insane!
I do of course apologise if I’ve ever some across as someone who just shits on Marvel, because that’s not who I am. I grew up being a massive Spider Man fan as a kid, and these heroes and films will always have a place in my heart, but I’m still going to critique something even if I love it. If anything, I think it’s even more important to acknowledge flaws in your favourite things. I’m certainly not right in ever instance, and I don’t think I know everything there is to know about writing!
My main hope from all of this is just that future writers learn from these mistakes and become better writers because of it. 
I genuinely appreciate the fact you went to the trouble to find my blog again apologise, because it’s something that I see rarely. I hadn’t paid much attention to your original comment, but your apology is valued and appreciated. It’s honestly something I don’t usually receive amidst a sea of “yOu’rE JUst mAD bEcAUse yOuR faVE DieD!!”
Likewise I hope that you continue to express your own thoughts and opinions on writing in an articulate manner, and hopefully you see less of those posts that proper do your head in! Thank you for explaining your point of view to me, and thick skin or not, apologies and calm conversations always go a long way.
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