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“You good to go?”

Jon double-checked his backpack and the gift bag holding all twenty-five Valentine’s cards. He gave a thumbs-up.

“Good,” said the man. “And don’t forget to zip your jacket; it’s cold out. Love you, kiddo.”

“Love you too, Dad!”

Jon zipped his jacket and hopped out of the car. The chill nipped his ears like birds at a feeder. Like the many yesterdays before, he joined the sea of children trickling into the stout brick building. He smiled at a pair of kindergarteners half his size sprinting by, hand-in-hand, their wet boots making little pitter-patters on the pavement. 

And like always, Jon located his locker—Kent, Locker Number 2015—and inputted his combination. Valentine’s cards wouldn’t be exchanged until later, so he hung the bag by its strings next to his coat.

Plopping his things onto his desk, the first thing Jon noticed was a spiky-haired boy talking to the teacher. The second thing he noticed was that the boy looked like the people Jon’s parents worked with—a black turtleneck sweater with beige pants and a coffee cup in one hand. Jon knew everyone else in his homeroom, so this boy must be new.

The teacher pointed in Jon’s direction. It took him a second to realize that they were looking at the empty desk across from him. Jon flashed his brightest smile and waved.

“Hiya!” he chirped. “What’s your name?”

“Damian,” the boy answered flatly, opening the desk and unloading the brand-new supplies from his backpack.

Jon rested his chin in his hands, legs swinging underneath the desk. “Nice to meet you, Damian! I’m Jon. So, where are you from?” 

Damian scoffed as he stacked his notebooks. “Why do you want to know?”

“Just ‘cause,” said Jon. 


“Ooh, I’ve heard of Gotham!” Jon replied. “My dad went there once to interview some people from the Wayne Foundation. What’s it like?”


“What was your old school like?”

“Must you ask so many questions?” Damian snapped. “Just be quiet and let me fulfill this godawful obligation in peace.”

That was enough to silence Jon… for about thirty seconds. Then he asked, “What does ‘obligation’ mean?”

Damian raised his hand. “Miss, I request a seating change.”

The teacher looked at him apologetically. “I’m sorry, Damian, but that’s the only spot we have left.”



Read the rest on Ao3

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(I’ve definitely done this before and I would highly suggest checking character tags on my blog in the future)

  • She and Jason collect refrigerator boxes and they’re in the process of constructing the ultimate cardboard castle (modeled after the Elizabethan era of course)
  • Harper once made a family meal out of edible starch packing peanuts and nobody noticed
  • On her eighteenth birthday, she got a tattoo on her ankle which simply says: “I got this because I can”
  • Mosquitoes are attracted to the color blue, which makes her (and Dick) the prime targets during summer
  • Her pranks largely consist of removing appliances and hooking them back up somewhere else (i.e. putting the stove in Damian’s bedroom)
  • Harper’s most frequently asked question is: “When did I get this bruise?”
  • She puts barbecue sauce on everything
  • Her go-to Monopoly piece is the airplane
  • Carrie once asked Harper to build a confetti bazooka—and of course, Harper obliged
  • Harper can balance a ball on her nose
  • Surprisingly, Harper gets seasick
  • Her favorite cake is German chocolate and when she’s having a bad day, the family members who can cook (Alfred, Damian, Duke, and Jason) will pitch in and surprise her
  • She owns several pairs of loaded dice, and for a while, she got away with it on family game night and everyone thought she was either really skilled or really lucky. It was Duke who caught her swapping them out from under her sleeve because of the light signature left behind
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So this is largely a comic phenomenon when we see the batfam together. Dick will often step up to the big brother/mentor role and balance out folks like Jason and Damian.

Not sure if I’ve mentioned this before, but I think Dick Grayson is one of those characters whose personality and portrayal are heavily context-dependent. In most of the animations, we see Dick either working alongside Bruce or with the Teen Titans, where he steps up as this serious, methodical vigilante—because that’s what the situation calls for. If we ever get a less-action, lower-stakes piece of media with him and his siblings, then (assuming the creators do their jobs) we’ll likely see that older sibling side of him.

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  • Damian can cook, but he can’t reach the tall shelves for all the ingredients. Tim will grab said ingredients… and move them to a higher shelf
  • The first photo Tim took was of Damian playing with Titus in the backyard. Damian caught him and for a split second, Tim thought he was gonna die. Instead, Damian told Tim to crop him out of the photo and just leave Titus. That’s how they wound up with a new pastime: pet photoshoots
  • On rainy patrols, Tim lets Damian under his cape to keep dry
  • One time Kon pissed Tim off so Tim commissioned Damian to draw Kon bald, which was then photocopied three hundred times and mailed to Kent farm
  • Damian is surprisingly good at hiding when he’s sick or tired… most of the time. His only tell is that he calls Tim “Tim” instead of “Drake”
  • Whenever one person’s watching the TV, the other will walk in, change the channel, and walk right out
  • On the rare occasion that Tim goes to sleep, Damian will silence all the devices and stand guard outside the door like a gargoyle to keep out any interruptions
  • Bruce and Dick don’t like Damian having too much coffee. So instead, Damian will silently sneak into Tim’s room and steal sips when Tim’s not looking. Tim, confused as to why his coffee is running out so quickly, will refill it. The cycle continues until someone else catches them
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  • Tried to shoot a bottle from three feet away and missed
  • Harper convinced him that “snake crocodiles” were a thing living in Gotham Harbor
  • He spilled mustard on his only clean uniform and had to go an entire patrol with a yellow streak down his chest
  • Damian caught Jason swaddling Alfred the cat in a blanket and calling him a “cutie patootie pie”
  • Jason played both Romeo and Juliet in a one-man production
  • Recently, Jason gained a new scar just below his right eye. When asked about it, he’ll say that it was from taking on Black Mask’s cronies. In reality, it was from messing with Roy’s bow
  • Tim has photographic evidence of Jason stuffing his face with chocolate cake in the middle of the night
  • It’s an open secret that Jason still uses Wonder Woman band-aids
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  • Roy finds a skull on a crime scene. Jason picks it up and starts reciting Hamlet
  • Whenever a play is in town, Roy buys two tickets and goes to Jason with excuses like “Kory said she’s busy” or “Lian has school tomorrow” because he’s too awkward and stubborn to admit that he likes spending time with Jason
  • Speaking of Lian, while she was at a sleepover Jason and Roy repainted her bedroom together. They spent the night designing a mural and ordered takeout. Jason fell asleep on Roy’s shoulder with a tiny dab of pink on his nose
  • One time Roy was on a mission while Lian’s school had an art show, so Jason went in his place. When some kid made fun of her painting, Jason jumped in like, “WHAT DID YOU SAY ABOUT MY KID, YOU TWERP?!?”
  • They go to an abstract art museum and Jason starts rambling about the deep meaning of a red splatter while Roy’s looking at the ticket receipt wondering how they got a couple’s discount
  • Also, at the museum, Roy drops cheesy pickup lines like, “I’d kiss you but the sign says not to touch the artwork”
  • Sometimes Papa Hood and Uncle Arsenal will read to kids at the Gotham library
  • They don’t see movies in theaters when it’s been adapted from books, otherwise the usher will kick them out for complaining that the adaptation is wrong
  • Bruce and Oliver can tell when Jason and Roy have had a date somewhere because they’ll find “JT + RH” graffitied inside a heart
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  • Sit on computers, homework, books, etc.
  • Knock things off the table
  • Stretches over the entire couch the moment someone gets up
  • Blocks the door so people can’t leave
  • Veers out of the way when people try to touch him
  • Hisses when he comes in contact with water
  • Can squeeze into any space
  • Occasionally meows
  • Grooms himself but refuses to let others groom him
  • Steals food off of people’s plates
  • Has razor-sharp claws
  • Brings back random things from outside as offerings
  • Follows people around
  • Scratching everything and everyone
  • Climbs into other people’s beds in the middle of the night
  • Likes the taste of catnip
  • Causes problems
  • Looks like he can murder you but is actually a cinnamon roll
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  • Bruce still has Dick’s first report card and to this day. Forget Nightwing achievements and all that—this is his biggest bragging point with Dick. He’ll pull it out and be like, “See this? My son got a gold star in recess. What did your snot-nosed kid do again, Karen?” And Dick will act all embarrassed because “Come on, B, I’m twenty-six” but secretly, it always brings a smile to his face.
  • He can tell when Steph’s having a bad day because she’ll be completely silent and oddly focused on patrol, so they’ll go off the scheduled route, grab some Batburgers, and talk about anything (or nothing at all)
  • Although it sometimes comes off as anger, Bruce is actually terrified any time Jason disappears without warning, even if he’s just at the corner store for five minutes because oh God what if something happens again
  • Bruce once took a raincheck on a Justice League mission because Carrie’s Girl Scout troop needed one more chaperone on their apple orchard trip 
  • Duke has free reins when it comes to inviting his We Are Robin friends to the Manor because Bruce wants him to still feel like a normal teenager. However, feeding a gaggle of teenagers on top of an already-huge family is a lot of work for Alfred, so Bruce takes over during this time.
  • Harper doesn’t always have the best outlets when it comes to taking out her anger, especially about her birth father. Instead of trying to force her to talk or use conventional coping mechanisms, Bruce takes her to the paintball arena and they go HAM
  • He calls Tim “son” more than Tim’s actual name
  • Whenever Cass does something super-cool-and-awesome, Bruce is always like, “She gets that from my side”
  • Bruce always makes a point of letting Cullen know that just because he’s not actively on the vigilante scene doesn’t mean he’s any less valuable as a Bat
  • Babs and Bruce bond over mystery movies and they like to see who can solve the case before the detective—and before each other
  • Bruce often underestimates Damian’s age, with Damian being both the youngest and smallest. He’ll be at the store and see a coloring book for toddlers and think, “Oh, Damian will love this” and then at home Damian will look at it and be like, “Father, this is for ages three to five” and once again it’ll dawn on Bruce just how fast his children are growing (but Damian will still color it anyway).
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  • Duke is an expert at calling dibs, mainly because he doesn’t shout “dibs” or make a big scene—he just goes
  • Jason is not allowed to pick movies
  • Sad animal films are not an option. The one time they did, Damian was inconsolable and it left everyone equal parts worried and scared because they didn’t know what to do
  • Carrie and Steph hog the candy to themselves
  • Bruce dips his popcorn in a bowl of melted butter, kernel by kernel
  • Dick sings to Disney songs, so Damian trained Titus to put a paw over Dick’s mouth whenever a musical number comes on
  • Tim mixes his soda with four espresso shots and about a half cup of sugar
  • Black and white movies interest everyone except Carrie, who falls asleep midway each time
  • Sometimes they play a game where Babs mutes the movie and they ad-lib their own lines (which led to everyone making Chewbacca noises during the Titanic ship sinking scene)
  • Alfred (with Duke’s help) made one big family blanket
  • One time Kate snuck the Birds of Prey in for a screening and nobody noticed until Dinah asked for a refill
  • Cullen holds the record for “most times someone accidentally sat on the remote”
  • Harper holds the record for “most remote batteries stolen because they’re being salty”
  • They have a very precise seating arrangement. Duke is always front and center because he gets there first. Cass is right behind him and uses his head as a chinrest, UNLESS Duke is commenting and dropping accidental spoilers, in which she sits next to Steph and Carrie instead. Dick always sits next to Bruce and Damian always sits next to Dick, but the pets are also always with them like a wall of fur. HOWEVER, if the movie contains guns, Damian will move to Bruce’s other side, forcing Jason to scoot over and get all up in Harper and Cullen’s space, and those two have to move forward. Then Tim will complain about Harper’s knees digging into his back, so he’ll move next to Kate. But the smell of his drink makes her nauseous, so she’ll switch places with Alfred and sit next to Babs instead. By the time they all get comfortable, the movie is over.
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Robin Chic™. Top-of-the-line. Classy but still fresh – Stephanie

Cool and casual; a much-needed modern spin on an age-old moniker – Duke

Mad respect to all of you for getting creative when the city needed you – Daxton Chill, Dre Cipriani, Riko Sheridan, Isabella Ortiz, Shug-R, Tancredi, Taylor, Travis Price, and Troy Walker (We Are Robin)

Elegant and refined, bridging identity and functionality – Damian

Yay, you have pants! – Tim

The OG Robin. A bit dated, but still a goodie – Dick

Copycat Dick with a tire iron – Jason

You literally bought yours from Party City – Carrie

Someone’s gonna come after me for not including you, but I still think you’re the Jar Jar Binks of this fandom – Jarro

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