#but...its just so. heartbreaking. three some odd years later. because in my mind hes always

[jjungkookislife]

Quarterly Fic Recs 2021 #2

Hello! I’m back with another rec list! Here are fics I’ve read, loved and thoroughly enjoyed in the second quarter of 2021! They are all very wonderful fics! Each story has its own genre, warnings (and are mostly 18+), so please take that into consideration before reading. If any authors would like me to untag them, please let me know. Enjoy!

Yoongi

before i leave you @hollyhomburg

summary: Yoongi Disappears- leaving behind a shattered pack. 8 months later, Jimin finds Yoongi in an H-mart of all places.

Hoseok

heart-on @junghelioseok

summary: my boss is always telling me how perfect her son would be for me and she promises he’s coming to the next holiday party and don’t worry he’s heard all about me too and ALSO there’s this dude i slept with once a couple of months ago and sometimes he still sends me dick pics when i ask him to at 3 in the morning cause seriously dude’s got a good dick

Jungkook

charmolypi @njssi

summary: Work and pleasure should never be combined — or so the saying goes. But you were never really one to follow the rules in their entirety and neither were the ones around you. Love, lust, interest. Five people. In the workplace. What could go wrong? Everyone just wants to get something, after all.

when you least expect it @johobi

summary: You’re in love with your childhood friend, Taehyung. The problem is, you treasure your friendship with him far too much to ever risk losing it. Oh, and he’s quite the Casanova. At your wits’ end with feelings you can no longer hide as diligently as you once did, you ask him to set you up with someone, anyone, in a last ditch attempt to avoid a heartbreaking conversation.

wherever there is you @jeonstudios

summary: you’ve been drinking, haven’t you?

instant gratification @dovechim

fuckboi@jungkook x cheerleader!reader

haze @yyooni

summary: So you’ve fucked the biggest fuck boy on campus. It’s a one and done. One night stand. A wham bam thank you ma’am. So why does it happen again?

OT7/Multiple Members

because i’m yours @minniepetals

summary: you should have known they’d never let you go after gathering the courage to ask for a kiss

blazed @ironicarmy

summary: Your friends try to cheer you up during Christmastime, but things go south once Hoseok appears with a mysterious brown bag.

Seokjin

one step @cutechim

summary:  attending an ex’s wedding is never easy, but you might just have the perfect remedy—if you can pluck up the courage to take it.

platonic @joheunsaram

summary: Finding a new method for stress relief, you rope in your bestfriend/fwb to try it out with you.

show me yours and i’ll show you mine @ktheist

summary: you’re a horny bunny yet kim seokjin always seems to manage to slide out of your grasps like a fox every time.

Yoongi

before i leave you pt. 7 @/hollyhomburg

summary: Pack omega kim Seokjin knows how to handle things when they go south (or alternatively you get triggered, Yoongi has a panic attack, and it’s a good thing the pack is there to help)

Hoseok

risky business @yoonjinkooked

summary: The person who invented smart glass office walls knew what they were doing. Your secretary fucks you stupid in the office.

snapshot @xjoonchildx

summary: after a day at the beach, hoseok has some surprises in store for his longtime love

keep me warm @ppersonna

summary: camping is always a great time when you’re with your friends, but even better with your boyfriend, hoseok.

it’s you @jinpanman

summary: An accidental confession throws your years-long friendship with Hoseok into disarray.

Namjoon

love bytes @stutterfly

summary: It’s been a year since you first met Kim Namjoon, the passionate, talented English professor at the local campus. He’s always been clumsy and aloof, but he’s on a whole new level in terms of “technologically incapable.” One call to IT was all it took to pull you into his life, and with it a whole string of friendships full of flirtatious banter and undying support.

Your dating situation has been drier than the Sahara for years now, and you’ve wasted too many lonely nights drinking alone, so you try your hand at Tinder. But you’re not getting any bites. When the group finds out, they are more than willing to help–even Namjoon, though he finds it increasingly difficult to deny that he’s hopelessly smitten. You consider their opinions on potential Tinder dates while fighting off feelings you never knew were brewing for the caring soul who becomes the home you never had.

out of my league @/ppersona

summary: Kim Namjoon was never supposed to find out about your years-long hopeless crush on him. And he most definitely was not supposed to find out about it in front of all your coworkers in a company-wide meeting.

so this is love @jinpanman

summary: “So this is the miracle that I’ve been dreaming of. So this is love.”

problem solved @sugasbabiie

summary: Namjoon helps you with more than math problems tonight.

love is @hxseok-honee

summary: they say that love is supposed to transcend time and space and that it knows no limits. but putting an ocean and thousands of miles between two people won’t make things any easier, will it? 

Jimin

potent pink @dntaewithluv

summary: The first time you see Park Jimin you’re instantly entranced by him. And it turns out he lives in the apartment next to the one you’re moving into, so even better he’s your hot neighbor. When the previous tenant confesses to you that he was the best hook up she ever had, you’re that much more intrigued. The first time you meet him, however, you’re deciding immediately that you hate him and want to stay as far away from him as possible. Jimin is determined to be a constant in your life though, and he definitely is that. Both a constant flirt and a constant pain in your ass. Is a ruined second impression enough to prevent you from ever giving him a second chance?

Taehyung

hush, yeah? @kithtaehyung

summary: the innocent accident that started it all

unfinished business @/dntaewithluv

summary: Besides wanting to catch up with some old friends, there’s only one reason you found yourself agreeing to attend your 10 year high school reunion. The boy you were in love with back then is going to be there, and you’re determined to finally make your move. Except, unfortunately, it turns out that Kim Seokjin is very much happily married. Kim Taehyung, however, is very much single and feels like he has something to prove to you after you turned him down all those years ago. One night is all it takes to make you realize you made the biggest mistake of your life.

under the covers @jessikahathaway

spy!au

darling @bloomsuga

summary: “go to sleep, darling.”

as endless as the stars ^

summary: he waited 160 years to meet you again, and now that he has, he’s not letting go. or: “i love you as deep as the ocean and as endless as the stars”

dirty dishes @jaysdimples

summary: when your boyfriend can’t seem to keep his hands to himself so he stirs up a little trouble in the kitchen while everyone else is a few feet away in the next room

devotion @/sweetbunnykook

summary: You and Taehyung were inseparable once. When you come back to your hometown after three years, fate pulls you back to him. And this time, Taehyung won’t ever keep his eyes off of you.

Jungkook

commercial break; twelve @1kook

summary: Anyway, if it was up to Jungkook, Kim Doyeon would not be a member of the Engagement Ring Committee.

tease @adonis-koo

summary:You came with the intentions of your best friend landing a job as a stripper. You never meant to catch the eyes of the king stripper of the establishment- Jeon Jungkook, yourself. With what was supposed to be a harmless way of paying off college debt faster you find yourself falling into a very odd and passionate relationship with your new mentor. Between infidelity, passion and jealousy there’s never a dull moment at Cherry Bomb.

jock!jk @angelguk

summary: going raw with jock jk

evolution of a lover’s heart @jeonstudios

summary: the rules are simple: first one to take the virginity wins.

euphoria @btssavedmylifeblr

summary: At the end of your life, you are given one day to live again with the man you loved. A lifetime’s love story told in a single day.

idealizations concerning real life relations @venusiangguk

summary: jungkook loves to be loved, but he doesn’t love in return.

relax @itsbuffsanta

summary: jk is antsy after the concert, so you help him relax.

employee of the month @/dntaewithluv

summary: Sometimes it truly amazes you how much of an idiot your boyfriend can be. But you also find it impossible to say no to him. Even when it involves letting him fuck you at his work on the same day that he gets awarded employee of the month…

ego 08 @suga-kookiemonster

summary: what’s a girl to do when her sweet, innocent baby lab partner isn’t quite so sweet and innocent? well, he’s a grown-ass man, and you’re about to learn that the hard way.

only you 10 @sweetbunnykook 

summary: Jeon Jungkook, your wedding photographer, helps you escape on your big day upon learning about a secret your groom-to-be kept hidden. You soon fall for this young, passionate photographer. However, you underestimated just how much he was willing to reciprocate that love. Maybe, you think, he’s loving you just a little too much.  

lunchbox lovers @jiminrings

stem major!koo x cold senior!y/n

crunchyroll & rail @/1kook

summary: Never mind the fact you really like Sailor Moon, or that you really want to pay attention to every little detail; the moment becomes Jungkook and his big smile and his red cheeks and the tiny box he produces from within his pocket.

only for you @jikookiekosmos

summary: It’s the night before your wedding and you should be happy…but a fight with your fiancé leaves you second guessing everything. A visit from the blue-haired boy of your dreams is just what you need to make it right.

lillies @dewykth

summary: “… white lines, pretty baby, tattoos, don’t know what they mean, they’re special just for you…”

bluekooberry @kimtaehyunq

summary: Your adoring boyfriend, Jungkook, surprises you with a brand new hairstyle before your trip to visit him for the weekend. He’s excited to see you, feed you, and give you exactly what you want.

bad reputation @noteguk

summary: in which you have to deal with some strange emotions for the first time.

not yet @bratkook

summary: jungkook feels the pang of guilt in his gut when you spot your recent ex out with his new girl, and what better way to make the jerk hurt than to have him believe you were now dating him, the neighbor he had been insecure about your whole relationship

incoming: elite chatboy @kookingtae

summary: welcome to Elite Chatroom, a sex chat company with a wide variety of services such as text messaging, phone call, and video chat. you signed up online for the most basic text service plan not knowing what to expect, but you certainly didn’t think you’d end up actually liking the man behind the screen.

ineffable @euphoria-vmin7

summary: your best friend Jeon Jeongguk has always been amazing and deserved the best, so you’ve hid your love for him. But unbeknowsnt to you, there may be feelings that could change everything between you two…

touch @gardentulips

summary: when you tease and please one another

Multiple Members

friendly fire @kpopfanfictrash

summary: The dynamic: Hoseok; your friend and previous fuck buddy. Jungkook; Hoseok’s roommate and subject of your massive crush. The scene: determined not to drunk-gush about your crush any more (to his face), you decide to seclude yourself from all campus parties. Until, of course, Hoseok guilts you into a favor. Things spiral from there.

the boys are back in town @/dntaewithluv

summary: Getting stood up by your date definitely hadn’t been on your agenda for the evening. Also definitely not on your agenda: bumping into Park Jimin and Jeon Jungkook. Together. On the same exact night. It’s been a while since you’ve seen your two best friends, as well as lovers on multiple occasions, from your high school and college days. A chance meeting, some drinks, and a trip down memory lane is all it takes to reignite the attraction between the three of you. Old habits die hard, but these two? They just might be the death of you.

ruin you @taegularities

summary: “His eyes hold unfathomable darkness that lures you in, captures your very soul, steals any air you are trying to draw. And you know without a doubt that you’re on the path to utter and irrevocable ruination.”

ruin you (once more) ^

summary: Taehyung and Jungkook can’t keep their hands off you. Not even in the elevator.

Seokjin

kairos @luffles424

summary: When your financial aid falls through for your last year of school, you fear you’ll have to drop out and postpone your degree. Until Taehyung gives you a suggestion to make a lot of money, quick. His idea can’t possibly end well, can it?

appetence @luffles424

summary: appetence (n.) - an eager desire, an instinctive inclination; an attraction or a natural bondIt’s time for Seokjin’s rut. Are either of you prepared for this step?

tiny lights, tiny lies @ggukcangetit

summary: you aren’t sure when exactly your best friend’s brother went from being an oddly annoying set of broad shoulders to the shoulders you frequently fell asleep against.

Yoongi

the little things @kimtaehyunq

summary: When the present isn’t exactly enough for you right now, Yoongi is here for you through it all. He makes sure you know you aren’t alone and that it’s ok to feel alone.

cyberslut @kimnjss

summary:  he has no idea who you are… up front, you’re sweet and innocent - but in reality you’re the exact opposite. running your own nsfw account, where your favorite topic is his hands.

yoongi drabble @joonsgalore

life guard au

Hoseok

benefits @cutechim

summary: you and hoseok have taken the ‘friends’ out of friends with benefits, but exclusivity has its own perks.

Namjoon

namjoon drabble @lovetrivia

summary: You’re a hot girl on Twitch and Namjoon is an absolute simp.

Jimin

baby fever @writtenwhalien

summary: Jimin wants another baby, and much to your delight, he’s determined to give you one.

jimin drabble @/1kook

best friend au

small hands jimin drabble @lavishedinjimin

established relationship au

silk and lace @sunshyngal

summary: Min Nara is the newly dumped fiance to the Crown prince of Korea, Park Jimin. She’s not overtly upset , because at least now she can live her life without the pressure of the monarchy hanging over her head. Besides , Nara has a very dirty little secret. While she spends the day as the perfect high society girl with an impeccable pedigree , her nights are filled with lacy lingerie and webcams.  Ignored by the man she’s meant to marry, she revels in the greedy lust of strangers on the internet. It’s her way of saying ‘fuck you’ to a system that sees her as nothing but a toy, molded for the future King. Park Jimin doesn’t know the first thing about his supposed fiancee. And he has no intention of learning either. He knows just what debutante girls are like and he has no patience for the kind. Besides, his girlfriend of three years, the elegant and independent Irene is everything he would ever want in a wife . Or is she?Because in the secrecy of his office , after the day’s work is done , Park Jimin has a very scintillating vice that he likes to indulge in : the beautiful camgirl who calls herself the Temptress. Jimin can’t get enough of the girl’s lush thighs wrapped in silk, the pretty pink of her nipples in see through bralettes and the glittering temptation of the jeweled plugs she likes to stuff herself full with.Jimin thinks she embodies  everything he can never allow himself to have as a Prince : filth, sin and decadence , all wrapped up in Silk and Lace.

Taehyung

nip it in the bud @opaljm

summary: You’re not sure how you ended up here, but maybe a shitty ex and a horrible breakup had a hand in what placed you in front of the tattoo parlor. It was already a nerve-wracking experience, but what you never expected was seeing that the owner and artist giving you nipple piercings was your older brother’s best friend you hadn’t seen in ages. to make things even worse, he got fucking hotter.

taehyung drabble @joonsgalore

sugar daddy au

peanut @jungxk

summary: the making of peanut.

Jungkook

pretty kitty @venusiangguk

summary: you’re jk’s baby, his toy, and now his pretty little pet.

heavy metal @hisunshiine

summary: You come home from a trip to find your fuckbuddy has a… hole-y surprise.

devour @bloomsuga

summary: my sweet angel… i am going to devour you

grain of sand @jungkookiebus

summary: Blind since the age of 18 from a genetic disorder, Jungkook walked through life as if he never lost it, but on one fateful day seven years ago he literally almost runs into you. He fell in love nearly immediately. Fast forward to the present and it’s just another day in your quiet life with him by your side.

under the oak tree @mingoyeob

summary: as the eldest daughter of a duke, it’s your duty to marry at your father’s will. yet you didn’t expect to be marrying jeon jungkook, a knight of low status, especially when he departs for an expedition without another word after your first night. when he comes back three years later, this time as a renowned hero, how will you be able to face him and how will things change between you and your new husband?

jungkook drabble @1kook

dilf!jk

commercial break: thirteen ^

summary: Because for as much shit as you let him get away with, Jungkook is certain you’ll draw the line today.

sh. @wwilloww

summary: How could you say no to a month away in the mountains with your friends after six months of grueling quarantine?

jungkook drabble @lavishedinjimin

daddy!jk

OT7/Multiple Members

the end @jimlingss

summary: It’s been a habit of yours to vent in the form of love letters. There’s six in total. They’re kept secret, hidden in your closet. But on your 30th birthday, what you least expect is for each letter to become reality. All done by the whacky ghost of Christmas future trying to grant your birthday wish.

#jjungkookislife fic recs #jjungkookislife fic recs masterlist #fic recs #fic recs masterlist

[messrmoonyy]

really, really random but do you think you could write a shot of half blood prince tonks on christmas alone and she puts on the record player and dances to christmas music? (i know this is very specific ahaha)

I lovveeed this request so much! Thank you for sending it. I did write the whole thing and then re read the prompt and see if kinda strayed away from the prompt slightly, you asked for record player, so she does actually use a cassette player but I still hope you enjoy it!

As always request are open! Drop me an ask!

Check my Masterlist too!

Pairing: Remus lupin x Nymphadora Tonks ( only mentions of Remus. He does not appear )

Warnings: none. Just a very mopey Nymphadora

Tonks had never been one to take love all that seriously. In fact she’d thrown the word around almost carelessly, never really taking to its true weight and meaning. Falling in love with more people that she could count now. A ravenclaw girl in third year, a slytherin one in fourth, two different hufflepuff boys in Fifth and countless other short lived romances since. But when she looked back now she realised they weren’t really love at all. Because they hadn’t felt like she did now. When she thought of him. Remus.

It caused an ache in her chest, so deep it physically pained her. She knew that nothing else could hurt her as badly as this, only love. She hadn’t even meant to fall for him, she hadn’t planned to. He was wildly interesting and not to bad on the eye either, but she hadn’t being trying. It had just… happened. Friendly conversation became friendly touches. Friendly touches became late nights snuggled in the library by the fire. Which had become hand holding. Which had become kisses. And now… it had become heartbreak.

The argument they had had before he’d announced his departure had been a brutal one. She guessed it didn’t help that emotions were already running far too high with everything happening around them. She’d shouted. He’d shouted right back. He’d told her nothing she would say would ever change his mind and he was leaving. It was duty. His role in the war effort. To put his life as at risk as ever and plant himself in a werewolf camp for months on end. It’d ruin him, she knew it would. He’d told her about it from the first war, how much he hated it. How much it made him feel like an animal. Feral. Inhuman.

But she’d told him to go. Shouted at him and told him to get out of her sight, to go if that’s what he truly wanted. To never come back to her again.

She regretted that now. Of course she did. She wanted nothing more than to leave her parents house and turn up at Grimmauld place, drink tea and hot chocolate with him in the library, dance around to Sirius’ old records and talk about everything and nothing until the sun came up. But of course she couldn’t. Because he was gone.

To make everything truly worse, as another blinding hot blade to her chest, she couldn’t even turn to Sirius about it. Because he was gone too. And he really was never coming back. The loss of Sirius and her still healing injury from Bellatrix had knocked her down already, Remus leaving had just been the final kick. And it had all taken its toll.

She couldnt morph. Not a single fingernail would change the way she wanted. Thankfully for her she’d never really been one for tweaking her face dramatically , like she knew some with her powers did. But she felt lost without her bright hair, the tiny little tweaks to her nose and cheeks. She didn’t recognise herself anymore. She didn’t understand the face of the woman that looked back at her in the mirror, all limp dark hair and hollow cheeks. She wanted to blame him. Wanted to use it as some way to make her hate him. Forget him. So at least she couldn’t be relieved of at least one burden of pain, leave her with one less knife in her heart. But she couldn’t. No matter how hard she tried to.

“ You gonna come down love? Your mums made you some dinner. Even got some apple crumble for pud. Yeah? Try eat a bit for us? “ her dad appeared at her old bedrooms door, knocking slightly as he spoke. It had felt odd being back at her parents house again for Christmas, she’d hadn’t visited in longer than she wanted to admit. Work ask the order had been running her to exhaustion everyday. She’d hoped being back home would bring her some comfort. Being around her childhood things. But it hadn’t really been working so far.

Her mum kept silently crying to herself over Sirius, every now and then she’d look over at her and see tears streaming over her cheeks as she cleaned or cooked. Misery just seemed to follow her whether she went now.

“ Dora love? “ she turned around when he’d dad spoke again and forced a small smile onto her face.

“ yeah. Be down in a minute… save me a piece of crumble “ Ted gave her a sympathetic smile and quietly left her. One thing she loved about her dad was he knew when she didn’t want to talk, and left her alone when she needed it. Andromeda was one to fuss.

She took a deep breath and made her way out of the room and downstairs, knowing Andromeda would only send Ted back up if she didn’t surface within a few minutes. They were both sat at the table when she walked into the dining room, her father looking up with a cheerful smile.

“ here she is! C’mon petal before it gets cold “ Andromeda’s eyes were bloodshot as was the norm nowadays, she’d tried she her best to hide the fact she’d been crying. But there were still tracks in the makeup on her cheeks.

The entire house had been decorated for Christmas and she thought the fairy lights and the tinsel should be cheering her up. But she found it wasn’t. Even her dads cheesy Christmas jumpers weren’t making her crack her smile.

Dinner was painfully silent for the most part. Ted occasionally tried to get both women to talk about something but conversation constantly fell flat. She looked at her parents as he silently tried to coax Andromeda to talk, holding her hand under the table and looking at her with the same amount of pure love he always had done.

Tonks had always wanted a relationship like theres. And she thought she’d been getting there. Remus had looked at her like that. Gazing at her when he thought she wasnt paying attention to him. Sharing his mug of tea with her at order meetings, waiting up for her if she had a late shift at the ministry, making sure she had something to eat before she slept. Little things. Small ways he told her he felt the same as she did.

Until he’d thrown it all back in her face.

When Andromeda cleared their plates and went to fetch dessert, Ted too disappeared of a moment only to return with his hand behind his back and a grin.

“ look what I found today love. Remember this aye? “ he held his hand out with a proud look on his face. It was a cassette. One he’d made up for her himself when she was little. She’d always been fascinated with muggle things and she still had the cassette player buried up in her room somewhere “ your Christmas one! Fitting “ she took with the first genuine smile she’d mustered in a while.

“ thanks dad. It’s Brilliant honestly “ he sat back down again when crumble was served but his proud smile didn’t drop.

After dinner she made her way back up to her room with a muttered excuse of being tired and locked herself in. The cassette tucked into the pocket of her jeans. She rummaged around the various boxes of junk in her room until she found the player and pulled out the tape. She smiled slightly when she found the tape wonkily labeled ‘ Doras muggle Xmas songs ‘ , putting it into the player and waiting for it to play.

The first beats of ‘last Christmas’ started playing and she practically felt her hurt slipping away from her shoulders. She turned the volume up, the headphones now blasting the voice of George Michael into her ears and she forgot about her troubles for a while.

She danced around with the first full genuine smile she had in weeks on her face, every song that played transporting her back to some memory from her childhood. Even the slower ones had her smiling, waltzing with herself around her room. until the tape came to an end with silent night. She stopped dancing and the smile dropped as the almost hauntingly beautiful song played. She’d danced with Remus to the very song on that first Christmas of her being in the order.

She’d turned up at Grimmauld place on Boxing Day, on Sirius’ invitation that the three of them could have their own Christmas celebration but Sirius had still been black out drunk from the clearly heavy night before. So she’d spent the majority of the day with Remus, hiding away from the kids. Drinking, dancing and even singing when Sirius had joined them later to get drunk again.

Her moment of happiness had faded to pure nothingness and she pulled off the headphones, tossing the cassette player onto her bed. If she focussed hard enough she could hear Sirius laughing still, picture Remus’ face as he tried to look unimpressed by one of Sirius’ filthy jokes- and failing miserably. Or feel Remus’ arm around her shoulders, his lips on her temple. The purely joyful atmosphere where just the three of them could be happy, Remus not worrying about people thoughts on him showing affection to her because Sirius didn’t care.

She found her feet moving then at their own accord, out of her room and creeping past her parents bedroom, down the stairs and out the door. She jogged down the garden path and past the wards protecting the house, apparating the second she was out.

She turned up on the top step of number 12. She really shouldn’t be there. She knew she should just go back to her parents. It wasn’t safe. But her hands reacted on their own and she opened the door. It was quiet inside. The quietest she’d ever heard it. Now Sirius laughing- or snoring. No kids charging around and pestering Kreacher. No mad-eye stomping along the hall.

Her feet led her into the library and she felt tears brewing in her eyes. She wanted to see Sirius blacked out on the sofa, Remus sat writing up a report at the desk, a fire crackling away. But neither were there. And the fireplace only held charred wood. The ache in her chest made her breathless, the deep burning pain of missing a dead man and one that might as well be.

She’d never felt so alone. Never had such a overwhelming feeling of loneliness that it made she’d weak in the knees. She could picture Remus at the desk, the way his brow furrowed when he concentrated, or how his cheeks flushed when she’d sneak up behind him and wrap her arms around his neck. The countless nights they’d fallen asleep on the sofa, danced, kissed, laughed.

But now it was just an empty room. In an empty house. No laughter. No dancing. No Remus.

She wanted to be back in that library when it was full of life. When Sirius was alive. And Remus was by her side. But it was never to be again.

Sirius was dead. And Remus was gone. And she wasn’t sure he’d ever come back.

#messrmoonyy writes #remus lupin #nymphadora tonks #remadora #harry potter #remus x tonks #ronks #the marauders #lupin #tonks x lupin #tonks #remadora one shot #remus x nymphadora

[ktheist]

for the drabble game: college!taehyung + sentence starters + no. 8 under misc

8. “But I’ve never told you that before.”

muses. fratboy!taehyung / college!taehyung

x

kim taehyung and you have an odd relationship.

you’re not even friends, really. just two friends of a friend who makes an accquaintance and happened to find themselves in a secluded class some time after 5, once most of the classes are vacant. the lecturers have their own rooms and the classes are manned by persons from the admin and they hardly ever come around until 8pm when it’s time to lock the doors.

you find out taehyung’s obsession for art and he finds out your obsession for interior design. at least yours isn’t too far off from what mechanical engineering entails.

at some point, you can even say your interests are like two streams running side by side until it mingles at one point in time.

then, you find out that he’s part of one of the most notorious fraternities for their wild parties that lasts for three days straight at the end of every semester. and oh, here’s the good part, only the popular ones get invited.

“figures why you haven’t heard of me,” you tease.

“what? no! i-i’ve heard of you, i just didn’t have the pleasure of meeting you,” his wide-eyed gaze hints at a sort of innocence his brothers lack.

you wonder how he got sucked into the frat house shenanigans.

“chill, i was kidding, i’ve been laying low anyway,” you wave a hand.

“wh-what? why?” he asks and you’re not particularly restricted to telling him the reason.

“first year, jimin and i would’ve celebrated our 4th year anniversary - if you can’t tell, we were high school sweethearts,” you laugh, chest still prickled with the kind of pain only time can heal, “but yeeun came along, he fell for her and since she’s more popular, everyone just started believing that i was the one who got in between her and jimin.”

the rage in taehyung’s eyes spread like wildfire, burning and tearing down everything in its path until you place a hand on his shoulder and he looks at you as if you’re a goddess sent to placate hades’ wrath.

“it’s chill, at least i’m one heartbreak away from finding the right one,” you say.

but taehyung finds you with puffy cheeks and pink eyes as you walk out of the bathroom. it’s no surprise and yet it is. kim yeeun spilled coffee all over your hair and shirt and the slap you give her still reverberates against the walls of the lecture hall.

your friends who came out a second later connects the two dots and nudges you towards taehyung before scurrying away, but not with a threat of ‘you better not make her cry more, kim taehyung’.

why they left you with a boy you barely know is beyond you - but perhaps it’s got to do with the fact that delta psi is in tight rivalry of beta nu, the frat jimin’s been loyal to after he broke your heart and gave his to the girl that’s been microaggressively picking on you since day one.

“i heard the red mark on kim yeeun’s face is still there,” he casually says three days after he’s been running up to you every time he sees you somewhere in the large building made for sleepless engineering students.

“it better, i almost twisted my wrist because of it,” you roll your eyes but taehyung must have known that the hostility is awkward, forced.

then, so it goes, the many instances where kim taehyung and you would be spotted laughing or walking together as if he’s the boy who mended the broken girl’s heart.

unbeknownst to them that you’re the one gradually breaking taehyung’s heart with your ‘you know what, i’ve never had a guy friend’ and ‘chill, you’re scaring my potential boyfriends!’ at parties he starts bringing you to.

“i can’t wait to see johnny again,” you confess, smile curling on your lips as you nudge taehyung’s elbow, “aren’t you curious who this johnny-from-hometown is? might be another subject of you death glares.”

surprisingly, kim taehyung doesn’t bat an eye at the mysterious mention of the name.

“i know, she’s your cat.”

he keeps on walking whilst you stop dead in your track. it doesn’t even take fiv seconds to notice your lack of presence on his side before he stops too, twirling around and shooting you and arched eyebrow.

“but i’ve never told you that before,” you feel your own brows coming together in a frown.

“you mumble in your sleep,” taehyung points out as if it’s the most obvious thing to do.

“oh,” you whole heartedly believe him, falling back into pace with him.

in hindsight, you should’ve probably been more careful when you talk about sleeping and being in each other’s presence whilst that activity was happening. even if it was just taehyung helping out a drunk and offering her shelter until morning comes.

“yoo jia heard it with her own ears! they’re sleeping together!” is what’s been circulating around at the start of the week while you’re stretching your arms over your head as a yawn escapes you.

“i don’t wanna be that person, but,” jennie kim loops her arm around yours when she finds you in the hallway, heading to your shared class, “are you and kim taehyung finally dating?”

“finally?” you feel the muscles on your face contort into an ugly frown, “wait, does that mean there’s been speculations we were gonna end up dating? what?”

and that’s how you find out the rumor that starts up a fire throughout your whole class. by noon, it gets almost impossible to ignore those prying eyes that sticks with you as you stand in front of taehyung, “did you know? about the rumor?”

“can’t say i didn’t,” he shrugs.

“god-” you smack his arm and he dramatically raise his shoulders in brace for impact, “-damn it, why didn’t you tell me?!”

“what good would it do if i told you? ah! cuddlebugs, you’re hurting me!” his voice is exceptionally loud.

“c-cuddlebugs? what the-” you’re rendered frozen and wide-eyed by his tricks yet something in churns with butterflies.

“i’ll see you tonight, okay?” he pinches your cheek and slips past you with a sort of smirk that you’ve never seen him wear.

everything gets weirder from there after.

you become hyper aware of what kim taehyung does or say, the way he has two smiles; a pure box-ish one and a titled smirk that’s just enough to get your heart racing when paired with a rase of his eyebrows. there’s a hint of masculinity under the scent of fruity floral juul he smokes and sticks to his shirt. and his touches tingle. they tingle like a ghost of a touch lingering on the hand that he mindlessly holds to keep you from being pushed around by the wave of dancing bodies.

he laughs when you pull your hand away and crosses your arm over it, “chill, i wasn’t trying to make a pass on you, just making sure you’re still there when i turn around.”

you’ve had records of getting lost in the crowd when it comes to parties - and when are parties not crowded?

taehyung hands you an unopened can of beer and you look at him questioningly because he always pops it open for you, “you don’t trust me to hold your hand but you want me to open your drink for you?”

there’s an underlying brazenness in his teasing tonight, as if he’s mistakenly decided to wear a cloak of a frat boy than the kim taehyung you’ve known and loved.

as a friend that is.

“whatever,” you gulp down the drink with reckless abandon, appreciating the bitterness that somehow roots you to reality despite the impending buzz that’ll drive you away from said reality.

and then you’re back to your old self, laughing and joking around in that bench outside of taehyung’s frat house, sitting a little too closely until your thighs are perched on top of his and his hand is drawing circles on the outside of your thigh.

“i don’t like that,” you confess, “the way you’re trying to act all sexy and hot,” and without any warning, you take his face in your palms, squishing his cheeks, not enough to hurt but enough to make his eyes go wide with surprise and that innocent glint in them, “now, that’s better. that’s my taehyung.” 

then his hand travels up from your thigh to your cheek, caressing the heated area of your face with his knuckles, “but if i’m the cute, childish taehyung, you won’t see me as a man.”

“man schman,” you huff, hands falling into your lap, “a real man won’t feel the need to act masculine to get a girl.”

“then... if i tell you i-”

and that’s when you lean so far back, almost hitting your head against the metal edge in the process if taehyung hadn’t caught you in time. eyes screwed shut and mouth partly open, you mumble, “man... schman...” 

taehyung shakes his head, a smile playing on his lips. he unzips his hoodie and wraps it around you - that’s another one he won’t get back, but he doesn’t mind as much because- 

“you’re lucky i like you.”

#taehyung scenarios #taehyung x reader #taehyung x you #taehyung fanfic #bts scenarios #bts fanfic #bts x you #bts x reader #bts fic #taehyung fic #taehyung smut #bts smut #bts au #bts fluff #bts drabbles #drabble game 1 #excerpt from a fic i'll never write

[moonlightreal]

This is the “author’s note” I found on the amazon pages for the pretty hardcover Night World books.  My memory is that it was just there, the book-blurb at the top by the cover picture, was this. 

Like a bonehead I just copied the text without grabbing a screencap or noting the date.  The amazon page now has the publication date is December 2016 so this bit of optimism was just before Ms. Smith vanished.  Of course we don’t know when it was written or whose idea it was.  Was Strange Fate really finished or was someone just feeling hopeful? 

NIGHT WORLD Dear Readers, It’s hard to tell you how much the re-release of the Night World books means to me. It has allowed me to come full circle, to complete a cycle that began with Secret Vampire. It has allowed me to finish Strange Fate, which grew into an epic that included roles for almost every Night World character. And Strange Fate allowed me to show the origins of the Night World, the apocalypse that threatens to destroy it, and even a possible future in which the evil side of the Night World prevails. I am often asked how I conceived the idea for the Night World series. It began when I wanted to write stand-alone novels that would combine horror and romance. But I wanted more: I wanted to do a series in which this Night World—a vast, secret world that exists within the everyday world—would slowly reveal itself to readers. That’s why the first book is called Secret Vampire: the inhabitants of the Night World, composed of vampires, shapeshifters, witches, and other supernatural creatures I wanted to invent, are hidden from humans. A vampire is necessarily a secret vampire … because of the laws. I also wanted to write about a new kind of forbidden love. That’s not easy—most good forbidden love topics were old by Shakespeare’s time. But with this series, I could create the possibility of forbidden love simply by saying that the laws of the Night World prohibit a Night Person from falling in love with a human. But I still needed one more ingredient. I needed the rise of the soulmate principle to actively force Night People to fall in love with humans, no matter how hard they fought against it. Voilà! Then it was just a matter of making up interesting characters and setting them loose in my head to see what they would do. I often begin like that: sitting in a quiet room and searching for a sparkle in my mind that could become my new heroine. Sometimes it’s easy and a whole character shimmers before me. Sometimes I only get the faintest firefly glimmer of a new girl, and I have to hold my breath and see if that glimmer will materialize into a three-dimensional person. Heroes and anti-heroes are easier. It’s just a matter of picking one that will be a true soulmate for my heroine. I have a whole collection of these characters in my mind, all trying to crash the party. And they’re usually bad boys. The settings and in-depth plot development are another layer of work. But often the characters just run off and do what they want, and I have trouble keeping up with their antics on my keyboard. One thing I always do is look carefully at my characters and plot from all angles to make sure I’m not plagiarizing a book or series that I may have read before. That’s just normal procedure for ethical authors: we make sure our stories aren’t too much like another story we might have read. Of course, there are many ideas that have been around since the Babylonian myths, and many characters that are archetypal. But, really, it’s almost impossible to take many things from the body of another author’s work—say, someone else’s character(s) or plot or story device—without actually intending to do so. I can’t imagine wanting to do that. I wish I could say every author felt the same. Poppy North is a character I examined very carefully. I wanted to make sure she wasn’t too much like Bonnie McCullough, another petite character of mine from The Vampire Diaries. I didn’t even want to plagiarize myself ! But Poppy convinced me that she was a tough little squirt who by high school had already planned out her future, which is very unlike Bonnie. Poppy was going to marry her mysterious friend James—she just hadn’t informed him yet. Also, unlike Bonnie, she had a fatal flaw in her small body. In Secret Vampire, I knew I was dealing with a serious issue: terminal cancer in a high school girl. So I did a lot of research before deciding on a type of cancer that would be truly inoperable and give Poppy only a month or two to live. I went to several hospitals to talk to nurses in oncology wards. I always brought toys for the hospitalized children, but the whole subject was so heartbreaking I was almost afraid to tackle it. Once I did, though, I found that Poppy was even stronger than I had imagined. In the book, she makes the only choice she can to go on living, and she never looks back. Poppy is one of my favorite girls, and she ushers in Ash Redfern, who quickly became one of my favorite bad boys. Ash has a murky past of womanizing and … well, more womanizing. Ash returns in Daughters of Darkness because he has been ordered by the leader of all vampires, Hunter Redfern, to bring his three runaway sisters back to their cloistered vampire island. But when Ash locates his sisters, he runs straight into the human stargazer Mary-Lynnette, and the sparks begin flying—literally. Mary-Lynnette is a character I made up when I was a kid, and I’m always surprised by how many people like her and Ash together. Mary-Lynnette spends most of the time expressing her feelings for Ash by kicking him in the shins, but their dialogues are some of my favorite passages in the whole series. Ash, in turn, escorts Quinn into the series. And Quinn (who does have a first name, though he rarely uses it) is one really scary guy. A vampire since 1639 A.D., Quinn is sharp, cold, humorless, and heartless. Unlike Ash, who is mainly guilty of an incredibly long series of one-night stands, Quinn enters the series as a human slave trader. That is, he provides vampires with young girls, and he doesn’t ask questions about what happens to the girls afterward. This led to a problem: How on earth was I going to redeem this villain enough to make him someone’s soulmate in The Chosen? I really sweated over that. My first task was to make Quinn more sympathetic. The best way to do it seemed to be by telling a bit of Quinn’s own tragic story: how he falls in love with sweet Dove Redfern, and how her vampire father decides to make Quinn his heir. Dove’s father is Hunter Redfern, one of the most important vampire leaders in Night World history. This is the same Hunter Redfern who, nearly half a millennium later, sends Ash to drag his sisters back home. The same Hunter Redfern who sends his daughter, Lily, after Jez in Huntress. The same Hunter Redfern who tries to turn Delos into a merciless killer in Black Dawn. But, as a boy, Quinn doesn’t know anything about the Night World, and he is deeply in love with gentle Dove. When Hunter makes him a vampire by force and then when Quinn can’t save Dove from being killed, Quinn’s heart freezes over. For four hundred years it accumulates ice—until he meets Rashel. That’s another favorite scene of mine: when Rashel, a dedicated vampire hunter since (guess who?) Hunter Redfern killed her mother, encounters Quinn. A group of Rashel’s fellow vampire slayers have captured Quinn and plan to torture him, and Rashel is left alone to guard him. Quinn, feeling old and tired despite his youthful appearance and great power, gives himself up for dead—and is a little glad to do so. Rashel, however, can’t stomach the idea of torture. When Rashel talks to this most-hated vampire and hears his story, she deliberately sets him free. And that astonishes him. But it’s the soulmate principle working its magic. I loved making two such strong-willed enemies succumb to the silver cord that connects them. I especially loved hearing Quinn warning Rashel not to let him go—and then protecting her when her comrades arrive back in time to see that she’s let him loose. I really loved writing about Quinn and Rashel’s soulmate sequences. As Rashel enters Quinn’s mind, she sees “thorny scary parts” but also “rainbow places that were aching to grow” and “other parts that seemed to quiver with light, desperate to be awakened.” She begins to think that people ask so little of themselves. If the mind of a slave trader can look like this, an ordinary person must have the power to become a saint. It is with this revelation (and much penance on Quinn’s part) that Quinn is redeemed. That’s the thread that binds all the novels together: redemption. The possibility of a second chance. Everyone has choices to make, but even the most evil of vampires can choose to atone and be redeemed. It may not necessarily stave off punishment in this world or the next, but redemption is possible. I’ve been asked who my favorite characters are, and the answer always changes because it depends on the book I’m writing. Right now my favorites are three characters from Strange Fate. As for my favorite couples in the published books? Morgead and Jez—I suppose. Who would find themselves at greater odds than a vampire gang leader and his onetime superior, a vampire who finds out she is half human? I learned some cool martial arts moves as a bonus for writing about them. Then there is Keller, one of my all-time favorite heroines, and Iliana, the beautiful Witch Child, and Galen, ruler of the shapeshifters: the love triangle in Witchlight. Keller starts out seeming brusque and businesslike, but the love of Galen and of the unselfish Iliana help to heal her inner wounds. And I can’t forget Thierry and Hannah, and Circle Daybreak. I created Circle Daybreak because the Night World witches had only two clans: Circle Twilight and Circle Midnight. Those, like Thea in Spellbinder, who belong to Circle Twilight are not-so-wicked witches (that is, they don’t want to exterminate all humans like the darkest witches, those who belong to Circle Midnight), but they are still wicked enough. So what was to be done with all these new soulmates, when Night World law said that they must be put to death? Someone had to make a place for them where they would be safe, and I decided it was Thierry, one of the oldest vampires, and Hannah, his Old Soul soulmate, who has lived hundreds of lifetimes without ever reaching the age of seventeen. They are the ones who revive Circle Daybreak, where humans and Night People can forget about past tragedies and concentrate on a brighter future together. Although Thierry is an old vampire, he isn’t the oldest vampire. There is one older, the one who Changed him. She provides another thread that binds the series: the pitiless Maya. Maya is the first vampire, the witch who finds the secret of eternal life—and chooses to use it for evil. But there will be plenty more about her, including a look at the young Maya, her sister Hellewise, and their mother, Hecate Witch-Queen, in the upcoming Strange Fate. And so now I’ve come full circle, back to Strange Fate. But I can’t finish until I add the other joy that the re-release of Night World has brought me. It’s brought me into contact with you by e-mail. Night World fans write so many intelligent, articulate, courteous, exciting e-mails! I love to get messages from “old” fans, who say my works “got them through high school.” Thank you for them! And messages from new fans, who say they have just read all my reissued books—and are impatient for more. Thank you! And the messages that simply demand: “When is Strange Fate coming out?” Thank you, too! With a full heart, all I can say is thank you, thank you, and thank you again! I never thought I would have a chance to write an open letter to all Night World fans, and I can only wish that you knew how grateful I am … for this second chance. Sincerely, (LJ Smith signature image) P.S. I love to get e-mail, letters, and messages. Visit me at ljanesmith.net!

#nightworld #ljsmith strangefate #strange fate #LJ Smith

[rosaetae]

tce | epilogue

[this chapter is apart of the chrysanthemum effect]

☇ “Keeping your flowers, keeping your pain— it’s already everything you need to move on. How do you move on from things if you’re not willing to accept them?“

➣  pairing: taehyung x reader 

➣  genre: hanahaki!au, model!taehyung, weddingplanner(ish)!au  

➣  word count: 4.2k

➣  a/n: it still hasn’t hit me that this series is over :( i love this series with all my heart. what started off originally as a note from one of dreams became to a series that made me very vulnerable for some reason but i really hope u enjoyed this series. thank you again for all your love. enjoy the epilogue.

➣  summary: the hanahaki disease has become a stigma in this world where if you had it, you are looked down upon. her flowers were white chrysanthemums and they have been for the past two years. she was in love with someone who obviously didn’t feel the same way, and this was her way of moving on— along with the people in her life who had to conform around the hanahaki disease.

To say the least, blue poppies weren't flowers you felt much sympathy for anymore. In fact, it brought you an odd sense of happiness and thrill seeing it as accents for decorations placed here and there.

Jungkook explained to you (after you had to ask) that Blue Poppies was originally a song he wrote for Minji, describing how the vibrant blue matched with her happy-go-lucky persona, but Annie happened to help compose it. Blue poppies was Annie's favorite flowers and to compare a rare and bright persona to a flower, she offered the only flowers that popped to mind— blue poppies.

Annie and Jungkook encouraged that you come to their wedding as a guest, but as the wedding planner's assistant being paid on the hour, you stood beside Eunmi in your usual black blazer and pencil skirt, scanning over the wedding, making sure it was going exactly as planned as Annie and Jungkook deserved it to be.

The wedding ceremony was filled with teary eyes and applause of happiness, Eunmi and you letting out a breath of relief when they finally said "I do" to each other without anyone, not even the universe, opposing it.

You stand near the back of the reception, watching as the caterers provide early dinner to the guests as Jungkook spoke into a microphone, thanking everyone for coming and plopping some jokes here and there, and so on.

In the midst of it all, you find one of the caterers, talking to them about the course change in which you subconsciously scanned the entire reception. As you briefly scan across the long table of where Jungkook and Annie sat in the middle, Taehyung just had to peer up from the third seat down from Jungkook he sat at at the same time, a smirk on his face as you look away quickly and back to the caterer, resuming your conversation.

That was the only interaction you let yourself notice with Taehyung before some more shedding of tears and laughter in the air followed by many more of the speeches that were made.

And suddenly, it was just like that that the wedding reception came to its happy end and people were leaving in a trickling one by one.

When usual weddings are over, you help to gather the centerpieces of the tables, along with the leftover gift bags of some who did not take with them. As you were packing up Eunmi's car with the charitable leftovers, you were about to go in for another round before you spot Annie walking towards you, noticeably finished talking to the last guest.

She was in her simple gown, the one that made you see her in a brighter light, hair all natural down her shoulders, and dark brown eyes lit as she walks towards you.

"___," she calls your name, approaching you with a smile. "I wanted to give you something."

You stop to smile at her, confused as to what she could possibly give you.

"I know that you have been through a lot the past year and I really am thankful that you still managed to push through with this stressful wedding," she laughs sheepishly.

Arching an eyebrow, you give her a soft smile, your heart warming at her sweet words. And just then, she raises her blue poppies bouquet and holds it in front of her with a smile.

"It is said that the person who catches the bouquet would receive a lifetime full of happiness," she starts. "I wanted to give it to the person who deserves it the most."

"Annie," you gape, blinking multiple times at her.

She lets out a light hearted chuckle, grabbing your hands to grasp the bouquet yourself.

"You deserve all the happiness in the world, ___," Annie genuinely states.

There was this bright light that Annie elicited, as if a halo on top of her head, or wings that were attached to her back, but even then, an angel or not, she still manages to surprise you. Knowing that a billion thank you's weren't enough, you pull her into a hug, embracing her tightly before you look at her once more.

"Really. Thank you."

When you say that you took time for yourself, you took time for yourself— if holding true to your morals for two years wasn't convincing enough.

After being discharged from the hospital, you went back into your apartment and the first thing you did was walk up to your body mirror to lift up your shirt. And immediately, the two surgical incisions made on your abdominal and on your right side was evident. Doctor Wren informed you that the incisions would take awhile to heal, reminding you to treat it with care as much as possible.

Some may look at their surgical incisions with disgust, but when you look at them, you're oddly glad that it was there. It was nearly peculiar, seeing how an incision could mean so much to you.

Taehyung understood your wishes, respectively, giving enough time for yourself as he began to focus more on his career as a model while you came back and continued to work side by side with Eunmi.

Eunmi was a little discouraged though, after she was told the news about your removal and immediately gave you a paid leave, but when you were ready to come back, she was very dubious about that decision. However, knowing how persuasive you can be, she let you in, and in time, you caught up with Annie and Jungkook's wedding.

Taehyung and you still kept in touch. You saw him on magazines and bigger platforms a whole bunch, a good reminder to your conscience that he was there. He was also busy traveling and modeling that sometimes he'd call you without calculating the time difference and though you may be too tired at 3 AM, hearing his voiced at an ungodly time of day seems like something you needed. But that would be the most he would do, knowing that space was what you asked and he will give.

A lot has flew by in that time stance of two years. From being able to just breathe again to graduating university with a fresh job as promised by Eunmi, everything you've done has led you up to now— and you don't regret a single thing.

"You look ravishing tonight— okay, ouch."

Walking outside into the living room, you're letting out a laugh at the look Hoseok gave to Somin as he rubs his head, both of them sat comfortably on the sofa.

"You look pretty," Somin acknowledges after she lets out a giggle at Hoseok, sticking her tongue out at her. You give a glance down at your dress, a pretty red one that you had always double guessed on buying, but ended up buying it, only for it to stay in your closet for awhile— until tonight. "Where you going, hm?"

Giving her a look at the insinuation forming in her voice, you grab your bag that you had laid on the counter table. "Out."

"Ah, with Mr. Heartbreaker?" Hoseok inquires, eyes staring glued onto the laptop set-up on the coffee table, presumably continuing their Harry Potter marathon.

"Exactly the one."

"What's the plan that made you pull out the red dress?" Somin asks, a tongue poking out of her cheek. "It's like that Me Before You scene. Are you both going to an orchestra, by chance?"

"Just dinner."

"Dinner?" She repeats.

"Have fun, but not too much fun," Hoseok says with a smirk on his lips. He didn't even need to look up to see the look on your face you shot at him.

"If you need me, I'll be here all night with this loser."

"Until she kicks me out," Hoseok playfully adds in.

"Until I kick him out," she repeats, looking at him with a this look that almost made your heart warm.

It was this unexpected progress that Somin made. It wasn't just you who had an eventful year, a lot has changed around you, as well. From someone who hated the sound of commitment to someone who had finally embraced it, Somin had underwent another revelation and decided that running away was never the answer— a big thank you to Taehyung for that.

"Okay, lovebirds," you throw your bag over your shoulder. "I'll see you guys later."

Somin and Hoseok (if it weren't so obvious) finally made it— growing comfortably in each other's skins to the point where they were official to the public eye.

Before the soiree event that took place almost three years ago, Somin and Hoseok got into a fight, being why Hoseok wanted to surprise her the night you unexpectedly had to get surgery. The fight originated from Somin's original revelation where she learned that life is too short and after awhile, she realizes that any day she could lose him— and with all the strength she could muster, she asked to make the relationship work.

Hoseok, despising and loathing such romantic labels due to his big name as a CEO, inevitably got scared, and hesitated, which eventually angered Somin because after all this time, she thought he had felt the same, but his hesitation said otherwise.

And after the conflicts and your whole Hanahaki ordeal that semi-ruined the soiree (guilty), they finally met a consensus and realized that they do love each other, both with the same love and desire and made it work on a down low in the beginning.

After awhile, Somin told her mother first, as she felt that she owed it to her, as her mother was on her ass to get into a healthy relationship when she moved away. On the bright side, the reaction from her mother was pleasant— especially when she found out it was Jung Hoseok. Her own mother even called you to begin planning the wedding.

As Hoseok saw that, he took a step towards getting rid of his fear of labels and publicly told the world in an interview nonchalantly, where the interviewer showed candid pictures of him and Somin together at a cafe, going to the gym together, both of them in a car, and so on, in which he confirmed the news with ease.

"Yeah, that's my girlfriend."

To see Hoseok stay in the AM and come over just to be with Somin was peculiar to begin with. You're used to him sneaking out in the morning or him coming over just to pick Somin up, but when you see him in the kitchen, brewing coffee for two,  or he's watching movies on Somin's laptop with her, it's a sight for sore eyes— to say the least.

Looking at Jungkook and Annie, the newlyweds took their honeymoon to Cabo, spending a week with each other with lots of love. When they came back, Annie randomly called you to grab something to eat, and during that lunch date with the two of you, she told you all of the embarrassing stories she could think of about Jungkook and ever-so-gratefully, you made another friend.

Seeing Jungkook and Annie and getting closer to Annie personally, you learn that those two really do love each other. Maybe you were close-minded to think that Jungkook couldn't have been in love with one girl and another, but when you see how he looks at Annie— it's so beautifully tragic to the point where it hurts.

You have no doubt that he thinks about Minji— even if it's just a small thought about her, you knew that there was no absolute way he didn't think about her.

Him looking at Annie, it begins with adoration.

The way his eyes draw lines from her lips to her eyes, it's as if it's poetic. You could see the stars in his eyes by the way it twinkles even when Annie isn't even noticing his gawking. Then it morphs when a single blink changes his thought process and you don't even need to guess that he's thinking about Minji by the way he physically zones out. He's probably thinking about her and how she made it possible for him to finally sit comfortably in public and to stare at the person he loves with all the love and fervor he had for her. It was always something he could never do with Minji. And with several blinks, he's back to reminding himself that his future is with Annie.

But his always will forever be with Minji.

As for her, Minji has been exploring Europe as her art has been showcased in multiple countries (thanks to certain someone), burgeoning as you speak. You didn't keep up with Minji as much as you'd like to, but noticing from the magazine headlines and her trending art portfolios, she's doing just fine with the success she's paved her way for.

Though her unrequited love with Jungkook has left more of an impact on you, you could say that this unrequited love wasn't as terrible at all. Albeit bittersweet, but as you notice that Minji and Jungkook both reached a level of happiness of and on their own, you think that it isn't so bad. After all, you thought the biggest misconception of the Hanahaki Disease is that people believe that getting the surgery finally means moving on, but you guess everyone moves on in their own way.

To add on top of that, Doctor Wren finally published his book about the Hanahaki Disease.

All his research and other people's stories were compiled into one big giant book and oddly enough, by a spur of chances, he received the noble piece prize for his research.

In his book, In and Out of Hanahaki, composed of interesting chapters and in each chapter, he writes about the origins of Hanahaki along with alternating stories of patients he gathered from who experienced Hanahaki either with their loved one or themselves. Even Jungkook had a single chapter dedicated for Minji, but the names were changed.

One of the stories you liked so much was about a boy who had Hanahaki from a girl he never dated, his best friend. He had it at such a young age that he didn't realize what it was and assumed it was a side effect for a cold. After a few months of having it, his parents found him in the bathroom, throwing up pink tulips. And what happened was that he got the surgery, not knowing that he would forget about the girl he loved. After that, his best friend went up to him when he went back to school, but as if amnesia, he introduced himself, completely unsure of who this girl was.

You liked it so much because in the end, the girl understood that she gave him Hanahaki and grew closer to him, creating new memories with him and even reliving the old ones that they shared that she eventually fell in love, too.

Doctor Wren never finished the story in that chapter and left it with an open ending. But curiosity got the best of you and when you asked him about it out of pure curiosity, he tells you that the boy with pink tulips fell in love again after some time.  

As for your story— the one with a story that still makes you laugh today and that just so happens to have a 'special case', Doctor Wren had kept you as a main story for most of his research as they were new observations and evidence. He compared his acquired knowledge to new research to you. From suppressing your flowers, to your morals, to finding flowers in your lungs, your name became a huge impact on the book.

You were considered the girl with her flowers becoming the reason as to the verge of her death— but she always saw them as the reason for her living.

Because as you have gone through all of the side effects, the emotions, and the rollercoaster the universe implanted in you, Doctor Wren created a new side effect dedicated to you and your flowers.

When one wakes up from their Hanahaki removal surgery and can remember the person who caused the implant of the flowers clearly, the patient has experienced The Chrysanthemum Effect.

You get to the restaurant at a reasonable time, walking up to the hostess with a smile. And with a nod, she knew which table you were going to say because she immediately leads you to the one set up next to the window that gave a glamorous overview of the city below.

"Hope I'm not late," you greet with a grandiose smile on your face, pulling out the chair and sitting down gracefully.

Your date of the night shows no dread as he is seemingly astonished by your sudden appearance. "Almost thought you weren't going to show up," he says, bringing his forearms to rest on the table.

"Was running a little. Couldn't figure out what to wear," you semi-lie. You were late because of an annoying client who took forever at a meeting— you knew you were going to show up in the red dress no matter what. "Did you order already?"

He lets out a sarcastic gasp, as if offended you would ask such a thing. "What kind of gentleman would I be if I had not waited for you?"

The subtle of chivalry in which he had waited for you to order was sweet that you give him a sheer smile, grabbing the menu and scanning whatever catches your eye.

The restaurant was busy, but busy in an elegant way— if that was remotely possible. The chatters were poise and you were almost sure by such finesse that this was definitely going to take a large amount out of your bank account.

"What meal entices you?" He speaks up, eyes not leaving the menu.

A good question that you have yet to answer, but telling by how your eyes keep roaming down the pasta portion over and over again, "Pasta," you respond hungrily. "Mainly gnocchi."

"Can't say no to gnocchi."

As if on cue, the waitress walks by, greeting herself as she pours a bottle of wine into both of your glasses and swiftly takes both of your orders. Watching her leave, you look back at your date who just took a sip of the wine.

"You look stunning tonight."

"Don't I always?" You muse, grabbing the glass carefully.

"Of course," he laughs, shaking his head. "But I was talking about that dress on you. I remember you bought it but never wore it."

Arching an eyebrow about a small observation that he somehow remembered, you spin the wine in the glass. "That's because I never found a reason to wear it. Until now."

You don't miss the smirk on his lips. "Who are you trying to impress?"

"No one in particular." Your riposte was quick and the minute it rolled off your tongue smoothly, you smile into your glass, taking a sip of the bittersweet drink. 

"You're a piece of work, ___," he chuckles, straightening his posture in the chair. And the minute he meets your eyes across the table, you could point out the city lights that reflected from his eyes. "Always have been."

"Sounds like you missed me," you teasingly observe, setting down the glass carefully. "Or you could be practicing that on another girl."  

He scoffs light-heartedly. "This again?"

You shrug, giving him a teasing look.

"You, out of all people," he speaks lowly. "Should know by now that there's no other than you."

Impressed by his quick responses of words, you arch an eyebrow. "Good," you nod, cheeks growing hot. "That's good. Because you don't have to wait for me anymore, Taehyung."

Your words seems to catch his ears just by the way they perked in response. He clears his throat, an evident cocky smirk appearing on his structured face that probably formed by the way you were turning red. "I'm sorry can you say that one more time for my poor old hearing?"

Narrowing your eyes at him, you take a quick breath. "I think I've had enough time for myself and I'm sure we've had enough time with each other in this confusing gray area—"

"In my defense, you made it gray. It was such a nice black and white picture and all of a sudden you're at my door and you're drunk— not that I was complaining—"

"Taehyung," you hush him, scowling. You cringe at the situation he was referring to— but that was only because you were really missing him that you showed up to his door and... well, the rest is history. "You're ruining a perfectly good moment for me to tell you that I want to try being with you again."

"Oh, really now? Is that what it was?" He overconfidently grins. "Continue."

You let out a sigh, the thought of giving up swiping through your mind as you shoot him a look. "I asked you to go on this date with me because... because I think we've done enough waiting for each other. And I just want to tell you that... I'm ready. And I want to try to be with you again, only if you're okay with that."

Maybe it was that inherent fear in you that your heart was beating fast when he hesitates. "And if I said I wasn't?"

"That's funny because I remember you telling me that you wanted me to make a decision soon?" Challenging look being sent his way, he takes it as a reason to laugh sonorously, a sound you genuinely liked hearing. "Or did you want me to remind you again, Taehyung?"

"No need," Taehyung grins. "Like I said, I'd wait for you." He brings his fingers to graze yours that laid on top of the table. His touch sparks a feeling in your heart. "And when you would be ready for me, I'd be ready for you."

The way he looked at you was a look that reminded you that the stars above realigned themselves for this very moment— and you wouldn't have it any other way. Him, here, this. "Good. I did not just spend nearly two years bettering myself and my mentality just for you to say you didn't want to even try to be with me again."

You were being a tad bit sarcastic, but it makes him scoff lightly.

"I've missed you," he sighs, taking his hand away to run it through his hair. "A whole fucking lot actually."

Rolling your eyes teasingly, you snicker. "It wasn't like I was entirely gone."

"No," he says, matter-of-factly. "But I did miss our walks to Planetarium."

"You're the one who stopped showing up in front of my apartment building."

"You said space, I gave you space!"

"You did give me space." Nodding, you smirk. "But it wasn't like I was entirely opposed to you walking with me in the morning to get a coffee fix."

"Ah, you drink coffee again?"

You hum in response. "And French roast will always be top tier."

He chuckles at that. "I missed you."

And maybe relationships aren't made to be completely perfect. There is such thing as right person, wrong time. But it's true that it wouldn't be the wrong time unless they tried, because hell, life happens. You don't realize who you really need until they're gone and luckily in this instance, Taehyung wasn't too late.  

The universe may not believe in being in love with someone who doesn't feel the same way, but fortunately for you, the universe does believe in second chances.

And here lies The Chrysanthemum Effect in full effect— with the stars realigning and your patched up heart ready to love the same person again.

"I missed you, too."

[Below is an excerpt from Dr. Wren's In and Out of Hanahaki.]

___ knew of this book I was attempting to work on.

Of course, I'm a doctor who specializes in a disease that was simply created by the gods, or the universe, or some sort of higher power, so I needed to share my new acquired knowledge of this disease that I collected and share it with the world.

But I didn't want to share just facts and research— I wanted to add stories of real life people who experienced with this disease one on one, knowing that this is a very peculiar disease that involves the emotional feelings of love. And having ___ as a patient of mine with the disease for two years, I deem it to be necessary (after getting her consent, of course) to explain as to what was going on in her goddamn head to think it was okay to attempt to suppress her flowers for awhile. (However, it wasn't like I discouraged her, knowing that no research has been discovered that having Hanahaki for more than a couple of months would cause significant harm.)

She had sat down with me, post-Hanahaki and The Chrysanthemum Effect, and told me this in exact words:

I believed that the biggest misconception was that people need to get their flowers removed to move on. Though, it may be the only way for others, it didn't resonate well for me. In my head, moving on was accepting your flowers for what they are— you know, to represent trivial love and the whole 'being a fool' idea, so I suppressed it.

And the point is: move on and grow. Accept the pain and suffering you've encountered and turn that into soil of your seed where you can be able to grow in the sunlight and reach for the sky. And once you are able to love yourself, then you can be able to love someone else.

#btsbookclub #kwritersworldnet #taehyung angst #taehyung ff #taehyung fanfic #taehyung scenarios #kim taehyung #kim taehyung angst #kim taehyung fanfiction #reader x taehyung #taehyung x reader #bts taehyung #bts v #bts x reader #bts angst #bts scenarios #bts ff #bts fanfic #thank you!! #i am so happy and proud of this series

[tillidontneedfantasy]

‘Future Nostalgia’ - Dua Lipa REVIEW: Changing the game through timeless pop.

Pop music is important. It distracts us, it brings us joy, it makes us dance, it attaches itself to memories forever. This is Dua Lipa’s blueprint for her sophomore release, Future Nostalgia. It’s there in the name; she wants her music to be everlasting, so that it can be branded with one of the fondest descriptors possible: nostalgic. 

Quite an ambitious objective, but not surprising for 2019′s Best New Artist Grammy winner. There is great pressure that comes with such a title, but Dua has proved herself worthy of it on Future Nostalgia. She does not just want to be the best new artist, but one of the best artists, period. “You want a timeless song, I wanna change the game,” is the opening line of the album and title track. Luckily, we all win in this scenario; although the song itself might not be the game changer, there are plenty of tracks on the album that are game changers because they have a timeless feel to them, which is not something many of her contemporaries are doing. 

Future Nostalgia’s only drawback is that there is not much lyrical depth; despite misconception, pop music can explore profundity, especially considering the subject matters of love and heartbreak, which are prominent themes of the album. However, I can accept and respect pop music that operates closer to surface level as well, especially when it’s done as well as it is on Future Nostalgia; I mean, I’m not complaining.

STRONGEST TRACK(S): “Don’t Start Now,” “Pretty Please”

Has there ever been a lead single as strong as “Don’t Start Now”? Co-writers and producers for the track include Ian Kirkpatrick, Emily Warren and Caroline Ailin, all of whom penned her excellent breakout song, “New Rules” (sans Lipa) in 2017. The song is split into three segments- verse, pre-chorus, and chorus- all of which sound distinctly different from the others, yet feel like such a natural equation. The bongos in the chorus and the later addition of a string section over the synths, leading to a full and rich final chorus just throw you for such an exciting loop, it is impossible to not have fun listening to this song. On top of the melodic genius of the song, its straightforward lyrical message is just as empowering as the music itself. “Don’t Start Now” is Dua’s expression of liberation from the pain of a heartbreak, and a warning to the breaker in question not to come crawling back when he sees how much she is thriving, and boy, is she!

Despite the enormous success of both “New Rules” and “Don’t Start Now,” Kirkpatrick and Ailin only work with Dua on one other track of the album, “Pretty Please,” and it should come as a surprise to no one that it is the next strongest song on the record. Penned alongside singer-songwriter phenomenon Julia Michaels and co-produced by Juan Ariza, “Pretty Please,” a track about needing the sweet relief of a lover, is one of the album’s few breathers. And in it, Lipa is asking for a breather herself: “when my mind is running wild, could you help me slow it down?” she asks, and then the song brilliantly does just that when she sings the next line, “put my mind at ease,” before returning to its original speed. There are other great musical tricks sprinkled throughout the song, such as a sound that mimics the feeling of the line “trickle down my spine.” The track continues to build musically but is never too much, it’s always just right. 

WEAKEST TRACK: “Boys Will Be Boys”

She tried with this one. She really did. Look, I love a song with a strong feminist message as much as the next girl, but this one was just a swing and a miss. The first verse of “Boys Will Be Boys” starts off strong, quite accurately depicting the fear women face on a daily basis, the way we have to alter our behavior to keep ourselves safe. But with each verse, it feels less sincere and more contrived, with lyrics such as “in case you needed it mansplained” and “if you’re offended by this song, you’re clearly doing something wrong.” Additionally, it is an odd closer for an album full of fun pop songs; it’s possible it is there as a warning for anyone who might get to the end of the album and think negatively of how she asserts her femininity and sexuality in a way throughout that is universally accepted when men do the same. And while the intended message is indeed important and true, it lacks the necessary delivery.

THE IN-BETWEENS

The delivery on the lust-filled, dance-inducing tracks are much more effective. “Cool,” an incredibly infectious song about losing control around the person you’re into, experiments with Dua’s vocal abilities and range, with pointed squeaks at the end of her words and a gorgeous switch into her lower register at the beginning of the final chorus. “Physical,” the second official single, is an intense and wildly fun song that could work as the soundtrack for a long drive, a night at the bar with friends, or in a workout class. While the album very successful achieves sonic cohesion, it can sometimes get a bit tiresome; “Hallucinate” feels like it was made simply to be played at festivals, and although the lyrical sentiment of “Love Again” is nice enough it could have been a moment for a more subtle musical departure. 

BEST PROSPECTIVE SINGLE: “Levitating”

Never thought I’d be such a fan of a song that uses the term “sugarboo,” yet, here I am. No track on the record quite captures the concept of “future nostalgia” as well as “Levitating” does, with its futuristic sounds and lyrics that I can imagine we will be singing forever (yes, even the “sugarboo” bit!). In every way, it perfectly encapsulates the pure elation that comes with meeting someone and feeling a heaven-made connection. Every element of this song makes it a necessary single choice: it’s extremely catchy, it has a perfect tempo for anyone of any age to dance to it, “yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah!”s, and lyrics in the hook that are perfectly spaced out to remember and chant (”you! moonlight! you’re my! starlight!”). Bruno Mars WISHES he wrote it; it feels like a song for which everyone would get up at a wedding to dance for years and years to come. I, for one, will get up every time, at least.

***

It’s impossible that Dua could have predicted while creating her album that this would be the state of the world at the time of its release. Many artists with new projects have decided to cancel or postpone their releases until further notice due to the COVID-19 pandemic. This is understandable for a myriad of reasons, from the inability to properly promote the work to feeling as if it just might not be the appropriate time. Although it might feel like there is little to dance about right now with the world crumbling around us, Future Nostalgia gives us reason, now and for the future, when we can hopefully look back and remember an album that provided us levity in our darkest hour. So stay indoors, facetime your sugarboo, and thank whatever the hell you pray to for pop music. Grade: 4/5

DISCLAIMER - REVIEWER’S BIAS: I have been a casual fan of Dua since “New Rules” exploded on Tumblr in 2017, but not much more. However, I have a specific fondness for her, as my favorite client of all time was a huge fan of her shortly after, so when I listen to Dua it reminds me of her. I hope she’s loving this album and that it’s bringing her joy and comfort in this uncertain time. I’m a huge proponent for female pop artists and the meticulousness of their craft, and I think Dua has done an excellent job of taking constructive criticism and improving, utilizing her strengths in a way that blur out her weaknesses. The release of “Don’t Start Now” felt like a turning point in her stardom, and this album is the proof. I really would like to see some stronger lyrical work from Dua, as I feel there are little to no moments on the album where I feel impressed or particularly moved by any line, and although I love and support fun and light pop music, I think it’s also very possible to have upbeat pop music with much sharper lyrics. I think she kind of tried but the few times she did they didn’t quite land. If she had a couple of songs stronger on the lyrical front, this would have been a nearly perfect album for me. But for a sophomore effort, this is great. It feels like a nice breath of fresh air in a time that’s filled with anxiety-ridden gasps, and I’m grateful for it. 

#dua lipa #future nostalgia #don't start now #cool #physical #levitating #pretty please #hallucinate #love again #break my heart #good in bed #boys will be boys #emily warren #ian kirkpatrick #julia michaels #new rules

[bouncyirwin]

Bouncy’s Masterpost || 2019 Edition

This is something I started last year that I plan to keep doing! I present to you the good, the bad and the ugly of 2019!

♡ 2018′s Masterpost Order: from oldest to newest. 

Februrary 2019

[1] Wish I Knew You | 13,527 Words | T | KakaSaku & GenIno A lost bet and a forced dare brings two lonely losers together. Sakura never thought something as absurd-sounding as the 'No More Lonely Losers' program would land none other than Konoha's hottest bachelor and her long-time crush in her lap. KakaSaku. Rating might be upped later.

Snippet:

"Sakura? What in the world are you doing under the table?"

She froze in horror as a certain silver-haired, dark-eyed man bent to peer curiously at her. "Is this some sort of fun three-way fondling in public, because you guys are not being very discreet about it."

"O-of course not!" Sakura spluttered, and her head collided with the table edge in her hurry to get back into her seat. "Oww!"

Temari very much choked on her chuckles as Sakura pressed a soothing green hand to her head and lowered herself into a vacant seat with as much dignity as she could muster. "Kakashi, you dirty old man, don't say such nonsense."

March 2019

[2] Between the Lines | 1,711 Words | T | ShinRan [Detective Conan]

There was something about him when he was quiet, mind brimming with facts, with truths that could shatter the world that was so terrifying and exhilarating and she often found herself lost in thoughts of him, spaced-out looking at the arch of his brow and the slope of his nose and the pucker of his lips. One-shot. ShinRan.

Snippet:

Shinichi had always carried a confident tug in his shoulders, an arrogant streak in his eyes, and mischief in his smiles wherever he went. Even on the most brutal crime scenes those traits never faltered. But now ... he was so contained now, like he walked on fragile glass instead of the earth. Like it might've shattered beneath his soles if he made the faintest impression.

This Shinichi walked in measured breaths, with his eyes peeled open and his shoulders hunched in ever so slightly—it was as if he wanted to take up less space, like he felt exposed. And Ran's heart went out to him, every time.

[3] Closure, Part III of Resolutions | 2,220  Words | T | KakaSaku In which Sakura realises it isn't too late to find happiness and lets go. [Three-shot, KakaSaku]

Snippet: 

She stared at his hands in her lap and wondered how to phrase her words in a way that didn't make him bolt, "I think that… that people don't see this side of you. I used to think you hated kids. But I don't think that's really the case. I think it'd be a shame if you never had children."

[4] Late Night Revelations | 4,166 Words | M | KakashixOC

Nousagi and Kakashi crash in an Inn after a grueling ANBU mission. Things take an unexpected turn as Kakashi's more playful side makes an appearance.

Snippet:

“Kakashi,” Nousagi said after what felt like ages of silence.

He cracked open one eye, leaning his head in her direction in silent inquiry. The action made his hair fall into his eyes, which in turn made her chest tighten in a strangely pleasant way. “Are you okay now?”

He gave her a lazy smirk, “You’re awfully worried today—I’m fine. Almost bored actually.”

“No Icha Icha?” She gave him a meaningful side-eye and almost laughed when he let out a sigh. “Yep, thought so. Let me guess: unsalvageable after a week of dirt and blood?”

“Don’t rub it in,” he grumbled sourly, to which she did finally laugh.

[5] Stolen Moments | 1,830 Words | M | ShiSaku

"All that blood really brings out your eyes."

Snippet:

He flashes in front of her, manifesting into something distinguishable from the blur of the nightly forest just as his blade sweeps down like the damning call of the reaper and severs clean through the enemy's neck. This time the blood splatters her face and cascades down her cheek to drip down her vest.

Shisui sheaths his sword and turns to face her. The shadows conceal his features, but his eyes stand out a crimson red through the darkness. He steps forward, and suddenly the moonlight bathes him in an ethereal glow and his eyes darken to a liquid charcoal. He smiles—something dangerous and sharp as his fingers glide over her bloody cheek, "All that blood really brings out your eyes …"

April 2019 

[6] The Sound of Silence | 1,656 Words | T | Merlex [Grey’s Anatmoy]

He watches her eyes fluttering open. Tentative, like the wings of a butterfly, and he's afraid to hope. She's bruised beyond recognition. Swollen, blue, heartbreaking, and still everything he ever wants. 12x09. Merlex.

Snippet: 

"Mer … " He's talking, and he knows she can't even hear him, but he just wants to say her name, to taste it on his tongue, to pretend everything is okay.

He tries to smile even when it hurts his face. Even when his jaw resists. He tries to smile for her.

May 2019

[7] Watch Each Other’s Six | 3,222 Words | M | StevexPeggy [Marvel]

Steve wants the life he's lost back. He wants to righten his place in history and most importantly, he wants to do right by Tony.

Dad!Steve, Baby!Tony, Post-Endgame.

Snippet:

It’s barely a flash, but the thought still hits him like a fist in the gut and his breath catches. Tony Stark’s face in a framed photo on a casket, and Peter sobbing, and Pepper trying hard not to fall apart while Happy shamelessly devolves into tears. It still hasn’t fully sunk in, possibly because he has suppressed it, violently, that Tony Stark—Tony who walks the ground in measured steps because it could barely contain him and that dramatic, lively flair of his presence—could possibly be gone forever.

And isn’t that why Steve hesitates? Because here one form of Tony will live while there, there’ll be none?

[8] The Universe Released | 897 Words | T | IronStrange [Marvel] 

There’s a man that lays in his bed every night, that burrowed and tucked himself into a nook in his heart and made a home for himself where Stephen had forbidden anyone else. There had been no rational answer, no cogent way to figure out how Tony Stark, someone he had despised at first glimpse, had instilled himself into the very centre of Stephen’s universe and made himself its point of gravity.

Written for IronStrangeWeek2019 Day 3: 10 Years Later

Snippet:

“That long, huh?” Tony chuckles and runs a hand through Stephen’s hair. “Suprised we made it this long?”

Stephen shakes his head, his arm snaking around Tony’s middle and tugging them closer. “There hasn’t been a single day,” Stephen begins, eyes flickering to lock with Tony’s, “In which I doubted you being the one for me.”

“So suave.” Murmurs Tony, eyes half-lidded as they drop to Stephen’s lips. “I’m already in bed with you, you don’t have to sweet-talk me.”

[9] Do you know that thing, of which the heart bleeds? | 950 Words | T | Gen [Marvel]

Tony never thought of himself as particularly selfless, but when he meets those endless blue eyes, sees the way Stephen’s fingers curl and one stands firm and absolute, he thinks to hell with it.

Snippet:

There’s an odd sense of relief that only lasts a flickering second. Life has never been kind to him, and now it won’t be able to take from him any more than it already has.

(But, ultimately, Tony knows otherwise. He is but a man, and all he wishes for right then is some peace of mind. But he can’t help but think about all the years lost from his future: watching Morgan grow, sending her to college, making love to Pepper, having another kid, and maybe another, why the hell not? And he knows, that life will continue to steal from him even when he’s six feet under, even when he’s got nothing left to give, and he thinks peace is for the ignorant, and that he is anything but).

[10] Raw Skin and a Bleeding Heart | 602 Words | G | Ironstrange [Marvel]

He presses a kiss to Stephen’s hair, it smells of mint and warmth, and Tony finds himself thinking about the vast universe, the endless stretch of space, the planets and the moon and the sun and how there isn’t a single place he’d rather be at, at that moment. A companion piece to The Universe Released, can be read independently.

Written for IronStrangeWeek2019, Day 7: 14000605.

Snippet: 

He loves Stephen in all the unconventional ways, he knows. He loves Stephen in the little spaces between the spoken and unspoken words, in the loud silence that separates their bodies, in the way two broken souls slot together perfectly.

June 2019 

[11] Moment You Loved Her (back) | 7,936 Words | T | KakaSaku

Some things are just worth breaking for. KakaSaku AU.

Snippet:

The seconds stretch out, wearing his patience thin. There they remained, an elite jounin, appearing to stand cool and collected before a human trainwreck. Yet somehow she managed to make him feel like she was a queen looking down from her throne at him, as she decides his punishment. How is it that her gaze alone threatens to shatter him? He feels stretched thin, and like all the pieces of him are about to crumble from all of the cheap glue and rough treatment.

There's a moment where Kakashi just wants to give in and fall apart; just hand himself over to her and hope for the best. Even if it means he has to gracefully endure her silent treatment with the humility of a man who knows he's wronged a woman in ways he doesn't necessarily understand.

[12] Make Me Lose Control | 6,459 Words | M | KakSaku

A mission to Ame turns into a paid vacation, and Kakashi and Sakura find themselves crossing all sorts of lines.

Snippet:

"Give me my book back."

"Or what?"

"Don't challenge your superior."

"As far as I'm concerned, I'm the head of a chain of hospitals all over the shinobi nations and you're an ex-Hokage who can only go on diplomatic missions anymore."

Kakashi gasps, "Take that back."

"Children." Shikamaru sounds and looks utterly exasperated from his perch against the desk at the reception area. Behind him, Shizune is sniggering to herself as she types away on her computer.

July 2019

[13] Tangled Up In You | 20,414 Words | M | HarleyxPeter [Marvel]

Besides him, Harley seems to need a moment to collect himself. “Hey,” he says, fingers touching tentatively at Peter's knuckles. Peter nearly flinches, tingles chasing Harley’s touch. “It’s okay—look at me—it’s okay.”

Even in the darkness Harley’s eyes glint and they’re so beautiful for a moment Peter can’t look away.

“I don’t mind this,” Harley tells him, firm and genuine. “If you’re curious about… about kissing a guy, I don’t mind.”

Snippet:

“Ned. Ned.” He says urgently. “Um. What does the news say exactly?”

Ned pauses. “Um… someone uploaded a live video of those men invading through the roof. Obviously he was caught but the video was already out there and the police were alerted. Why?”

Peter wishes he could say his next line without wanting to choke himself with his own bare hands. “I… I may have done something really, really fucking stupid.”

“Oh? You mean that you kissed Harley in the middle of a crowd of awe-struck teenagers? Yeah, not your best move.”

August 2019 

[14] Un-Break My Heart | 2,884 Words | T | KakaSaku

He's beautiful like all broken things are, in all the ways they could be mended, in their complexity, in their contrasting fragility and resilience. And Sakura never learned how to not love broken things. [KakaSaku]

Snippet:

Perhaps he notices that, because he lets her.

She laces their fingers together, determined to keep him right there next to her and can't believe the kind of way it makes her feel to have his palm pressed against her own, his stuttering pulse against her wrist.

"Just try," she beseeches him, and expects a rejection.

"Okay." He says after a pause, voice cracking. "Okay, Sakura."

[15] Black and White | 3,150 Words | G | ShisuiHina

Hinata makes a bento for her crush, but this ends up being Shisui's lunch instead.

Snippet:

He was such a refined and exquisite mix between gentle and hard, such an alluring aesthetic, Hinata attributed her sudden infatuation to those rare qualities.

"What?" he asked, suddenly, dark eyes shifting to meet her own.

In the wane orange glow of the setting sun, they looked like a portal to some other world and Hinata found herself trapped, sinking. They glittered, like mirrors, the darkest shade of charcoal, reflecting her image back at her in muted tones.

Hinata swallowed convulsively. "Sorry," it came out as a whisper, her eyes roaming his face.

What was she feeling?

Her heart thundered in her ears, as if afraid of the way it quivered and shook under this new weight settling over her chest.

What was this?

"It's just…," she swallowed again, unsure if she should voice those thoughts. "You have beautiful eyes."

October 2019 

[16] Stay With Me | 2,648 Words | M | KakaSaku | Fanart

Falling for her doesn't leave him with bruises and broken bones, it leaves him with warmth and the colour green and the rapidly addicting revelation that it might all just be alright after all. KakaSaku Proposal AU.

Snippet:

She cranes her neck back to regard him silently with her endless green eyes, and with her gaze comes a feeling a little like drowning, "You've just seemed ... a little off lately. You know you can talk to me about anything, right? What's on your mind?"

Kakashi considers that for a few moments—it's such a convenient opening. He bites his lip as he looks down at her, watches the way her eyes flicker down to his mouth before quickly flitting back up. "... I love being a ninja," he admits quietly. "Or, well, I got used to being a ninja. But ... you make me want to stay here with you."

She smiles, and it's radiant. "Yeah? That doesn't sound so bad."

[17] Bare Bones Ch 3 of A Shift in Space | 8,740 of 23,373 Words | T | Gen

Naruto Uzumaki was forced to watch every single friend he's ever cared about die except for one. Together, they will fix this. Together they'll rewrite fate. TIME TRAVEL. [New publish date: 30th. August]

Snippet: 

Naruto breathed a sigh of relief. "That'd be great… we need to do everything we can to prevent Orochimaru from luring Sasuke away."

Frowning, his companion slowly shook his head. "I don't think that'd work— I know you want to protect Sasuke but do you think Orochimaru would stop trying if he failed the first time around? No. Let's not risk it, we'd be blind in another attempt—much like the first time. We need to convince Sasuke to stay. We can't do anything about Orochimaru for now."

For a split second, Naruto looked like he might disagree. But then he gnawed angrily at his lower lip and looked away.

November 2019

[18] Every Last Drop | 3,378 Words | M | KakaSaku

“This isn’t about you. You’re amazing at what you do. I just … the shower—well—you’re just not a showerhead. And sometimes that’s what I want.”

When she chances a look at Kakashi again his eyes have widened slightly, and he looks entirely taken aback. “You—the showerhead?” The amount of disbelief packed into that word would’ve made a lesser woman dissolve into uncontrollable laughter.

The blush steadily spreads down her neck as she contemplates this bizarre conversation he pulled her into having. She really hadn’t wanted to ever discuss this with anyone. “Yes, the showerhead. Problem?”

Sakura looks away again, feeling the slow, simmering burn of embarrassment.

A few moments of silence later, Kakashi shifts, and when he speaks he nearly purrs.

“Can I watch?”

[19] Decisions and Choices Ch 13 of Underneath the Underneath | 5,500 of 61,803 Words | M | KakaSaku & GenIno

Our past is what defines us; what shapes us into the people we are. And Sakura… Sakura would've never guessed Kakashi was the product of so much suffering. With every strange dream, another piece of the puzzle is found; and with every vision, they grow a step closer to completion. NEW PUBLISH DATE: 23/4/2017

Snippet:

"Mmm ... Sakura ..." he rasped over a sigh, jolting her a little. He made no attempt to move, however, and after the passage of a few silent and heavy moments, filled only with his quiet breathing, she realised he was still asleep.

Was he ... was he dreaming about her?

Sakura chewed on her lip, her heart thundering in her ears. The rhythmic rise and fall of his chest was soothing, urging hers to calm down, to beat together as one.

December 2019 

[20] Let The Truth Sting | 3,163 Words | M | KakaSaku

Sasuke's first glance at Kakashi's face comes in the form of Kakashi's open mouth pressed over Sakura's. Or, in which Sasuke sees Sakura has found her happiness with someone else. Quite graphically. [KakaSaku, Sasuke's POV]

Snippet:

Sasuke still finds himself following them.

There's a subtle air of a routine, a comfortable familiarity found only between people who hang out frequently, and Sasuke's feeling of shame has receded to be replaced by a surge of irritation as it becomes apparent where the duo is heading. Down the block is Sakura's two-bedroom apartment, the one she bought for herself after she divorced Sasuke more than a year ago.

At her doorstep, Sasuke fully expects her to say her goodbyes to Kakashi.

Sasuke watches with a scowl as she invites him in.

Bonus - Art 

January - [x], [x], [x], [x], [x], [x], [x]

February - [x], [x], [x], [x] 

March - [x], [x], [x] 

April - [x], [x]

May - [x]

August - [x], [x]

September - [x], [x], [x], [x], [x], [x], [x], [x] 

October - [x], [x], [x], [x], [x] 

December - [x], [x], [x]

It’s worth mentioning that everything pre-may was drawn without a tablet! Also notice how the months I didn’t write in have like 5+ arts xD

#kakasaku #kakashi hatake #sakura haruno #naruto #fanfiction #art #bouncy's masterpost #2019 #genino #marvel #ironstrange #detective conan #shinran

[lnc2]

rattle my cage

Summary: In which history, despite Alya’s best efforts, does not repeat itself.

A commission from @booyahfuruya who requested Adrienette in the panther cage.

AO3

It was all Alya’s fault.

Not that she would ever admit to it.  If pressed she would adamantly insist it was all Nora’s doing.

Never mind that the tenacious blogger should have been babysitting and not chasing superheroes across the arrondissements– no, it was her sister’s overprotectiveness that landed Marinette in this mess in the first place.

This mess being a locked panther cage, a debilitating crush, and a literal pile of animal shit.

She cast a too-wide, uneasy smile towards her stupidly attractive, blessedly naive co-captive and waved.

Adrien, confused, waved back.

Ugh.

She really needed to have a talk with Tikki one of these days about what it meant to be Lady Luck. 

Because, honestly, she was starting to have doubts.

What was lucky about having a best friend who considered unmasking her superhero alter-ego her life’s purpose?  A best friend who pawned her actual responsibilities onto her too-accommodating boyfriend.

A boyfriend, who, by all accounts, was (justifiably) terrified of said best friend’s older sister.

An older sister who would and did not take kindly to the discovery that her baby sister’s boyfriend let her run off after a magical terrorist. An older sister who, after putting the fear of god into the boy, sent him after her, neglecting to put away her other sisters’ football in the process.  

A devastating oversight that sent said best friend’s father tripping and spraining his ankle.

All of which now culminated in being dragged out of her bed by an indignant, grounded Alya, coerced into helping out at the zoo while Monsieur Cesaire was recovering.

“Please, M.” She’d said, with the biggest, brownest puppy dog eyes Marinette had ever seen.  “I promise I’ll make it up to you.”

So, like a sap, she’d agreed.

Something Marinette was now deeply regretting.

Apparently, making it up to her meant pulling a Ladybug and “accidentally” locking her in the panther cage with Adrien before disappearing with her equally traitorous boyfriend.

E tu Nino?

In another life maybe, maybe Marinette could forgive Alya this so-called favor.  Another life where Adrien hadn’t just days before confessed to liking another girl.

She’s special. Very pretty. She’s got dark silky hair, deep and mysterious eyes.

Kagami Tsurugi was ladybug lucky and Marinette was the very good friend who’d volunteered to keep them company on their first date this afternoon.

She’d never dreaded ice skating more.

Even the solace of Luka’s company couldn’t stem the tide of that impending heartbreak.

And Alya, bless her, couldn’t seem to let it go.

“That could be you,” She’d said.  “You can’t give up now!”

It’d been a loud and frequent argument these last few days.  One Marinette apparently needed to revisit. Again.

“I’m really sorry about this,” She said, wiping her sweating palms against her jeans.

Akumas she could take down no problem.

Adorably earnest boys?  Not so much.

“No worries,” Adrien said, looking unfairly attractive for someone who was currently shoveling animal excrement.  “It’s not your fault Alya ran off with the keys.”

She smiled, nervous.  “Yeah. I guess not.”

“Besides,” Adrien said.  “I’ll just text Kagami and let her know.  We can always hang out another time, right?”

“Sure.”

She changed the subject then.  There was only so much a girl could take and Marinette felt stretched to the limits on her best days.  They moved on from fencing to school to his audition for the new Ladybug and Chat Noir movie when the screaming started.

Marinette froze as a woman’s terrified cry echoed through the park.  Adrien met her eyes across the cage, grimacing.

“What are the odds it’s just an escaped gorilla or something?”

She stared. He sighed.

“Right.” And then, more quietly, “Fuck.”

Marinette barely registered the epithet and his rushing towards the locked cage entrance as she whipped out her phone to call Alya.

The phone rang once, twice, three times.

“Don’t you dare leave us here while you play Lois Lane-” She growled, angrily hanging up when she was sent to voicemail.  She tried Nino next with the same result.

Fuck, shit, fuck.

“Aaaand the Ladyblog is live. Fuck.” Adrien said, echoing her thoughts.

He tossed her a worried look which she ignored.

She didn’t have time to reassure him.  She was already dialing the zoo’s front desk only to be met with the akuma emergency notification recording.

No phones, then.

Another scream followed by an earth-shaking explosion that nearly sent them both to their knees.  Adrien helped her to her feet and patted her sides. She waved off his fussing with a flustered, nervous laugh.

Now really wasn’t the time.

Reluctant but assured, Adrien tried the back entrance again, muttering a low string of curses with every useless yank of the door.

Marinette’s eyes scanned the cage for something, anything.

Maybe, if they worked together and had the proper leverage –  one of the heavier logs scattered throughout the habitat? – they might be able to fashion some sort of battering ram.  Although as the door opened inwards she doubted they’d be strong enough to do any good. And even if that managed to work the possibility of one or both of them getting hurt in the process was too risky. 

Marinette couldn’t even begin to think about what Gabriel would do if she injured Adrien by being so careless.  Her designing dreams dashed before they ever truly had a chance to take form. Adrien crippled, spending months in physical therapy, only to fall in love with his nurse.  Marinette growing old, unsuccessful, and dying alone.

Ouch!

Tikki pinched her side, sending her a look she knew all too well.

You’re catastrophizing again.

Right. Right.

So the battering ram was out.

There was some sheet metal near the exit - if she managed to unravel it they could try to catch the light and attention of any passersby.  Assuming of course there was anyone left nearby and that said people would be able to do anything in the first place.

She quickly dismissed any success there as unlikely.

She tugged at her pigtails, regretting her choice in hairstyle and its woeful lack of bobby pins even as she doubted something like that would work on the cage’s lock.

Or at least, she hoped it wouldn’t, no matter how convenient it may be in the current circumstances.

Although … Marinette met Tikki’s anxious gaze. I have something better than a bobby pin.

Tikki could get them out of here.  Preferably in a way that wouldn’t involve revealing her identity.

God, she could only imagine.

Hey hot stuff.  Real sorry to drop this extremely dangerous secret on your lap but Paris needs me. 

Yeah, no.

Marinette could do this without going that far.  All she needed to do was find a way to get Adrien away from the doors… and come up with some sort of explanation for how she managed to get them open in the first place.

Something that, upon consideration, shouldn’t be too difficult.  As ridiculous and incomprehensible as her stammering and excuses have been over the past year he always seemed to believe her.  A heart of gold and oblivious – Adrien Agreste really was the whole package.

Decision made, she nodded to her kwami who returned it with an adorable determination.

Excuse on her lips, she pointed towards the opposite side of the cage.

“Adrien I think we can use that log–”

“I’m sorry, Marinette.”

She whirled around to find Adrien much closer than before, mouth set in a firm line.  He was staring beyond the bars of the cage towards downtown and the likely akuma.

The what for was on the tip of her tongue when she caught sight of a pair of familiar, electric eyes blinking out at her from his open shirt pocket.

Wait…

“Plagg – claws out!”

Marinette reflexively shielded her eyes against the blinding flash of green light.  It was useless though– the stomach sinking feeling of shock and dread was already setting in.  She knew exactly who she would find when she dropped her hands.

Chat Noir gave a sheepish wave.

Son of a bitch.

“Um, hi."

Marinette blinked once, twice,

and then screamed.

“Wait– shh, no!” Chat (Adrien) said, ears flat, hands outstretched placatingly.  “Don’t scream. Please don’t scream, Marinette.  It’s me. I’ll explain everything I swe–”

“You...” She said, holding up a shaky finger.  “You...”

“Me.” He said, his lips quirking up into the smallest smile in spite of everything.

Oooh.  She could just kill him.

“You- You’re so stupid!” She cried and his smirk fell from his lips.

“Excuse me? ”

“We– we could have called someone!  Or jerry-rigged a battering ram! Or… or… you– we could have–” Marinette pulled at her pigtails and let out another muffled scream.  “I can’t believe you.”

“Me? ” He said, angry now.  “ You can’t believe me?”

“No,” She snapped.  “I can’t. If you had just given me a second I could have gotten us out of here!”

“With what?” He said, gesturing wildly.  “Your magic lockpicking kit?”

She stomped her foot, furious.  “I was working on it!”

“Well that’s great, Marinette.  Real great.” He crossed his arms and she wanted to smack that patronizing look right off his stupid face.  “But I don’t have time to wait around when there’s an akuma on the loose and Ladybug needs me.”

“What Ladybug needs,” She said, reaching up to poke at his temple.  “Is for you to fucking think.”

“I was thinking!”

“There are cameras, Chat.” She hissed, waving hysterically towards the blinking object in the corner of the cage.  “Oh my god.  Cataclysm that and recharge Plagg. We could have gotten out of here without the dramatics.”

Chat rolled his eyes.

“Oh I’m dramatic, she says.”

“Who’s wearing leather spandex?” She snapped before opening her purse.  “Tikki? Can you open that door?”

Chat Noir gawked as the little red and black sprite floated out of Marinette’s bag.  Tikki gave him the stink eye before phasing through to the other side of the cage. A few seconds later there was a distinct click and the door swung inwards.

Ladybug.

“We’ll talk about this later,” She said, cutting off his rising tide of gibbering, flailing, and panic.

Chat nodded, dumbstruck.  Unfortunately, his brain hadn’t caught up to his mouth and he said

“Where was that idea ten minutes ago?”

Marinette scowled.  “It was one of the first things I thought of, dumbass.  I just thought, you know, it would be best not to out myself.”

The reality of the situation had yet to set in but hearing Ladybug’s frustration come out of Marinette’s mouth was grounding.  Sort of. Maybe.

His mind flashed to their original plans for the day and he let out a mortified squeak.

Oh my god.

“How are you not freaking out about this?”

“Who said I wasn’t freaking out?” Marinette said, deadpan.  She pointed towards the security station. “First the cameras, then the akuma.  I’ll go find a place to transform.”

She shot him a familiar, scolding look that sent his heart stumbling over itself.

Oh my god.

He’d found her. He’d found her.

“Wipe that dumb smile off your dumb face.” Marinette said. “I’m still mad at you.”

Chat saluted, still smiling.  “Yes ma’am.”

“Ugh.” She grabbed him by the shoulders and pushed him towards security.  “Go.”

“Okay, okay.  Just…” He looked down at her over his shoulder, eyes soft.  “We’ll talk later yeah?”

“Sure,” Marinette said, traitorous cheeks turning pink even as she pushed him away.  “We’ll talk later.”

Much, much later. 

Like, after she’d had time to scream later.

With her promise of a future discussion secure, Chat bounded off towards the security station, the very picture of caught canary. 

Marinette met Tikki’s exasperated gaze with her own.

Her kwami shrugged.

“Well… at least he’s pretty.”

#miraculous ladybug #lnc2 writes #adrienette #ladynoir #marichat #identity reveal #commission #he's a dumbass but he's our dumbass

[empyreanwritings]

Never Let Me Go

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Word count: 2k

Warnings: mild angst (angst to fluff)

A/N: HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO THE LOVE OF MY LIFE! I can’t believe Bucky’s already one hundred and two. They just grow up so fast, don’t they? :’) This one shot it based off of this prompt. I saw it and knew I needed to write something to celebrate this perfect man’s birthday! Also, this was edited by my fiance, so if there are any embarrassing errors, let’s make fun of him together! 

Feedback is always welcomed and encouraged (:

Bucky stared up at the ceiling for what felt like hours. He tried going to bed early - to get a good night's rest for once. What a joke. His mind refused to shut off. One hundred and two. He was officially one hundred and two years old. He figured he should be ecstatic being one of the oldest men on the planet, but he wasn't. There was nothing to celebrate. What had he done during his life that deserved celebrating?

Sure, he helped stopped the end of the world, but so did everyone else. Most of his life was spent causing others misery. He never believed he could redeem himself despite everyone around him telling him otherwise.

You're important, Bucky.

You're a hero, Bucky.

He rubbed his hands over his face. A hero? No, that was Steve. Steve was the real hero. The one that everyone should look up to. He was the one who really saved the world at the end of the day.

He glanced over at the clock sitting on his nightstand. The glowing numbers told him it was three in the morning already. He had gone to bed seven hours ago, and not once did he manage to fall asleep. Not even for a few minutes. It was not the way anyone should kick off their birthday.

Bucky grabbed his phone and dialed the only number he knew by heart: yours. He knew it was late, but you worked night shifts anyways. The odds of you being up at this hour were in his favor.

The voice at the back of his mind warned him this wasn't a good idea. How long had it been since he'd spoken to you? A year? It felt like ten years of silence to him. He hated the way things ended between you, but it was his fault. He pushed you away to keep you safe. He didn't want you to worry about him whenever he went on missions. If he never came home one day, he didn't want you to mourn him. He should have known better. Together or not, you always worried about him. If something ever happened to him, you would have been devastated.

"Hello?" Your strained voice sounded from the other end of the line, bringing Bucky out of his thoughts. "James?"

"I'm sorry, I know it's late."

He thought about hanging up, let you go back to bed, but hearing your voice was intoxicating.

"No, no, it's okay. I just got home from work. They had me do some overtime."

"You sound tired."

You laughed. It was a short, breathless laugh, but it still sounded genuine. "I'm exhausted. I've worked five days in a row, and all of them were overtime shifts. I know I get paid pretty well, but five fifteen hour shifts in a row is hard."

"You never were good at telling them you needed breaks."

"You're not wrong."

A beat of silence passed, and Bucky's heart began to race. He didn't think this phone call through. He wasn't even sure why he was calling you, but he was suddenly glad he did.

"It's my birthday," he finally said after a long moment.

"I know. What are you now? Two hundred?"

Bucky rolled his eyes even though you couldn't see him. "Ha-ha, you're so funny. One hundred and two, thank you very much."

"Eh, I was close enough." During your relationship, you loved to point out the age difference between you two. You'd jokingly ask for the kid's menu when he took you out, or you'd ask when the early bird's special began. People tended to judge because they considered him to be too old for you, but you never minded what they had to say.

"You don't look one hundred, baby! That's what really matters!" You'd always defend.

"I've lived one hundred and two years, and I don't remember most of them. The things I did - the acts Hydra made me commit - they were awful, and I hate myself sometimes even though I know I shouldn't."

"Bucky. . ."

"No, let me finish," he quickly interrupted you. "I've done a lot of evil, and I guess I've also done a lot of good. But do you know what my biggest regret is? Letting you go. I tried to tell myself that you'd be better off without me. To be fair, a year ago I was still a mess, and I do think you deserved someone better, but I never asked you what you wanted. I just told you what I thought you needed, and I know that wasn't right. You should have had more say in what happened to us. And I'm - I'm sorry for that. You fought for me in more ways than one. You fought for our love, and I ignored it because I could only see the truth I wanted to see. That is my biggest regret."

You let out a shaky breath. He understood if you didn't have a response to his confession. He'd understand if you decided to hang up on him right now. It was a lot to process, especially after a year of silence on his end. It was a lot to take in.

"I-" You sighed. "I don't know what you want me to say, James."

"I'm sorry for dumping this on you. I know it's not fair to you." He pinched the bridge of his nose. He was suddenly exhausted. "Stark is throwing me a birthday party here at the compound. I think it's stupid, but he always wants an excuse to throw a party. I'd like you to come. You don't have to, but I hope you'll think about it."

"I'll think 'bout it."

"Okay. Thank you. I'll let you go now. Goodnight, love."

You paused, the use of his old nickname for you catching you off guard. "Goodnight."

---

Bucky swirled his whiskey around in its glass. The party was in full swing by now, and he had to admit that Tony really outdid himself this time. The drinks were flowing; bodies were dancing; and the colors in the room were vibrant. It would have been the perfect way to kick off one hundred and two years if Bucky genuinely wanted to celebrate.

He hated feeling this miserable.

Women tried cheering him up throughout the night, but they gave up when they realized that they weren't going to get anywhere with him. His mood was too sour, and he was completely uninterested. The only woman he wanted making moves on him hadn't showed up. And he really didn’t blame you for not coming. He sprung it on you last minute after a bold confession.

He downed the rest of his drink and waved the bartender over to get another one. He couldn't get drunk, but he sure as hell was going to try. At the very least, he'd try to drown his feelings in every glass.

Never Let Me Go by Florence and the Machine began to play over the speakers, and Bucky squeezed his eyes shut. This was your song. It was the first song you two had ever danced to at one of Tony's parties. He hadn't listened to it since your split.

The universe really thought he was a joke, didn't it?

A finger tapped him lightly on the shoulder. He turned around slowly, the glass in his hand almost slipping from his hold when his eyes met yours. Your eyes sparkled as you looked up at him, and the smile on your face was absolutely breathtaking. You seemed so calm standing in front of him now, while Bucky was falling apart under your gaze.

He was grateful you didn't have enhanced hearing because he knew you'd be able to hear his heart beating erratically in his chest. Was this real? Were you really here?

"Do you want to dance, James?" You asked and took the drink from his hand, placing it down on the bar beside him. "I mean, I did drive all the way out here. I think I deserve at least one dance."

You didn't wait for him to answer. You took his hand and led him onto the dancefloor. He noticed the way Steve's eyes grew wide when he spotted you two walking together. Bucky almost laughed at the double take he saw him do. He'd have to explain later - once he knew what was happening between you two himself.

You placed his hands on the small of your back before wrapping your arms around his neck. Every nerve in his body was on fire. He noticed every touch you made to his body. From the way your fingers twirled his hair to the way you nuzzled your face in the crook of his neck, you ignited a fire deep inside of him, and he could barely concentrate. And it didn't help that you smelled so good. Brown sugar and vanilla. It was your signature scent.

It reminded him of a time where his room would be invaded with your smell and how much comfort it brought him.

He leaned his cheek against the top of your head and smiled. "I'm glad you're here. I didn't think you'd actually come."

"I wasn't sure if I was going to either, if we're being honest. I called Tony and asked for the details on the party, and he ended up deciding for me. He said I needed to be here," you admitted quietly. "I was nervous about coming here."

"Oh? Why's that?"

"I wasn't sure if you actually wanted me here. I know you invited me, but it was three in the morning. I figured you might have changed your mind."

Bucky pulled back slightly, so he could look down at you. He saw the tears forming in his eyes, and he silently he wished he could take everything in the past back. He knew the pain he caused you when he left, despite telling himself it was for the best. And even now, he knew you were hurting because you didn't know what would happen between the two of you. He intended to fix that.

"I don't plan on changing my mind about you," he murmured. "I meant everything that I said this morning. Leaving you was my biggest regret, and I don't plan on letting you go again."

You chewed on your bottom lip thoughtfully. His words were everything that you wanted to hear this past year, but you were terrified of letting him back in. If he decided one day to leave to "keep you safe" again, you wouldn't be able to handle it. You were strong and independent, but you sucked at handling heartbreak. You'd never tell him, but this past year, you had been an absolute mess. You had to try and figure out how to live a brand new life without your soulmate, and it was harder than you imagined it to be.

You didn't want to go through that again.

"Please say something," Bucky begged.

"I love you, James. I think I will always love you, and that may just be my downfall." He wiped at a stray tear that slipped down your face, and you smiled. "I want to be with you, but we need to take it slow. You left me, and I can't trust you not to do it again. But I'm willing to work on us. I'm willing to make it work."

He couldn't contain the large smile that grew on his face. He could work with going slow, especially if it meant having you back in his life.

A hand landed on Bucky's shoulder, and he turned to see Tony standing behind him with a knowing smile on his face.

"Ready to open presents?" Tony asked, gesturing to the large pile of presents that sat at the front of the room.

"I already got the best present in the world," he gushed as he looked down at you. "I'm not sure if anything else will compare to that."

You rolled your eyes playfully. "That was incredibly cheesy."

"And disgusting," Tony piped in.

He shrugged and leaned down to plant an overdue kiss on your lips. Your whole body tingled at the contact, and you knew right away this was the best decision. You were fully capable of living without him - and you had for some time - but this was where you needed to be. You needed to be in his arms, and he felt the exact same way.

Marvel Tag: @killcomet

#bucky barnes #james buchanan barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes one shot #bucky barnes imagine #bucky barnes x you #bucky x reader #bucky one shot #bucky imagine #bucky x you #the winter soldier #the winter soldier x reader #the winter soldier x you #the winter soldier one shot #bucky barnes fanfic #bucky barnes fic #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvell #marvel fic #marvel one shots #marvel fanfic #marvel fanfiction

[theplumsoldier]

SPELLBOUND [2]

Summary: its the day where steve explains himself

Pairing: steve rogers x reader

Word count: 1544

Warnings: eventual smut, explicit scenes, vulgar language.

“You don’t understand–”

“You’re not giving me a chance to!” You cut off his calm voice, having trouble why he was ending the relationship. Admittedly, he had been acting rather odd the past few days, however, you had not believed it would lead to this. You sucked in a ragged breath and did your best to calm yourself. “Please just tell me what is going on, Steve. I promise I will be better.”

“What? No. No, Y/N, that’s not–you’re not the problem, it’s me. You couldn’t be better,” explained he vaguely and you could not help but let out a laugh. It was not bitter nor hateful, it was sad and longing, puzzled and bewildered. “This is about me. There’s something I have to do, you can’t be part of that.”

A good two–perhaps three months passed living in deep dole before Steve made his first try to reach out to you, but at that time you had nothing left for him. He had left you vulnerable, pathetic even and your mind had been occupied with the wondering question of why for so long, you had found yourself slowly becoming numb to not just the particular matter, but all others as well.

When you were fired from the museum, your world should have fallen apart, only it did not. You had been there for several years and always believed it would be your last place to work as well, but for some reason, it did not seem important when you were without job. Neither did losing your apartment and having to move back home to your parents. Nothing seemed important anymore and the calls appearing on your cell display every now and then, were brushed off just like the first call you received from an unidentified caller.

This mystery man later turned out to be the one and only Nicholas Fury, Director of S.H.I.E.L.D. and should anyone come asking, six feet beneath the ground, too.

He came with a job offering and solid paycheck; one you could not deny for, in spite of living with your parents for your whole childhood, you suddenly remembered why you had moved out at a young age.

So in your new home, with your new job, you were free from heartache and disagreeing, nagging voices and you managed to clean yourself up too. You looked better than ever or else it was only because you had looked like something the cat had dragged inside for so long.

For you, it was a new era and one you met with your head high, accepting no negativities in your life, including men’s shenanigans.

So when you were sat outside a café with a contrite face and a cigarette burning between your fingers, as you waited for your ex-boyfriend to meet up. You scolded yourself for ever agreeing to this, feeling completely and absolutely stupid for waiting for him to finally show up so that he could get what he had off of his heart.

Inhaling the filtered air, you shook your head and hurriedly got up from your seat in the mild sunlight and stubbed out the cigarette in the ashtray. What a fool.

Right then, as you stood up on your feet and swung your purse over your shoulder, your eyes caught Captain America coming your way. A sight left your lips, knowing very well there was no way out now and your work and wine would have to wait for later.

“Y/N! I’m sorry I kept you waiting,” apologized he as he approached you. Humming lightly, you sat back down, letting him know he could expect no politer greeting from you. He nodded at the ashtray and sat down before you. “Smoking now?”

“Is it me or you that’s gonna do the explaining today?” asked you, your face blank and voice hostile. You crossed your legs and waiting for Steve to kickstart the conversation.

Steve looked a tad bewildered but thought no more of your behavior. He figured he had it coming. So he dove right in, starting from the beginning and going on until the end of the story. He was convincing throughout the whole charade, and how his eyes never left yours only subsided his saying.

It had been a terrorist organization, apparently. He never seemed to be relieved of those and this time it had not been H.Y.D.R.A. but someone with just the same power and more, crueler in methods. He had already lost his best friend–he saw no reason to lose his best girl, too.

So that was why he separated himself from you doing the organization’s peak, he did not wish to have your blood on his hands. In spite of both his mind and heart telling against him, he made the choice and decided to keep you distanced until his involvement with the people were done.

Frankly, he had been hasty in the break-up and more secretive than needed which had left you with a broken heart, while he was out wiping terrorists, and when he returned months later to reclaim you, it was revealed that you had in fact moved on. Even moved away, and so when this came to his attention, he concluded with a heavy heart that you had left every remembrance of him behind.

“Why did you not come to find me, then? Had you showed up on my doorstep I would have listened,” said you, your voice unstable but you did your best to hide it. It showed pointless, however, for a tear had already been shed and people on the table beside you were staring.

Captain America, the heartbreaker.

“You had moved and were dismissing my calls; I thought the last thing you wanted was to face me. And after what I had done, I thought to just come barging into your life and demanding you to listen would be wrong.”

“So what made you think now was a good time to explain?” asked you more belligerent than intended.

The timing could not have been worse and especially if all he wanted was for you to accept an apology. You had finally sorted yourself out. Him coming back this unexpected was not fair. Now you would have to deal more sorrow and your liquor cabinet at home was nearly empty.

“When I saw you, I. . .” paused he and you looked at him with a gloomy expression. He had expected words to flow, but he had no way to explain the feeling he had been overwhelmed with and he never was good with words concerning delicate matters.

You noticed how it made him uncomfortable to speak about feelings and in public, with eyes on him, that should not be. This was a private thing and should only be discussed in fitting surroundings. This was not fit.

Clearing your throat and shifting in your seat, you wet your lips. “What do you expect from this?”

“Expect?” said he perplex and you nodded, awaiting his answer. “I don’t–I am not sure what you mean, Y/N.”

You sighed inaudibly for what felt like the hundredth time. “Now. After this. What will happen? I can forgive, but forget? I. . . Gee, that’s gonna be hard, I mean–if you’re all of a sudden gonna be a part of m life again. It does sound good, I’ll admit, but there will be some trust issues don’t you think? I will fear you will leave again–I’m not sure I can bear to lose you again.”

“I know, I know. I haven’t even thought that far but I–if you would allow me to, I would love to be with you again. We could start out slow. I can prepare dinner for you tonight if you want?” His voice rambled whatever went through his mind, which made you suppress a smile as you knew it was what he did when he was relieved.

Steve had just been insanely frightened you would decide you two had no future together. Had you declined him even after he had laid it all out and pretty much poured his heart out, he was certain his life would be over.

“Not tonight,” said you and offered him your best smile while still feeling a tad heavy-hearted. Truth be told, you had no plan for the night. The reason for you declining was that you wanted to allow yourself to think this whole matter over before committing yourself to a man you might not trust with your whole. “This Saturday, around six. Are you free there?”

“Yes.” There was no wondering to that question.

“Then you can cook me something nice. You’re still in that scrappy apartment?”

His lip curled upward and Steve nodded his head. “I am.”

You reached for a napkin from the table beside you and got out a pen from your purse and began scribbling. “Then we eat at my place. Come with whatever you need and my kitchen will be at your disposal.”

With that, you stood on your feet and grasped your purse, handing over the napkin with your address. Giving him a final nod you set marching and were then on your way, fingers fiddling to dig out a cigarette from your purse.

PART THREE

#Steve Rogers #steve rogers smut #steve rogers fanfiction #steve rogers x reader #steve rogers imagine #Chris Evans #chris evans smut #Avengers #avengers smut #the avengers smut #captain america #captain america smut #captain america imagine #theplumsoldier

[travllingbunny]

The 100 rewatch: 4x11 The Other Side

Now that I’m finally on my vacation and have the time to write these posts, I need to catch up. I actually rewatched up to 5x04, so now I need to go over 7 episodes so I could continue my rewatch of season 5.

Season 4 is one of my favorite seasons of The 100 mostly because of its last 3 episodes, which are all among my all-time favorites episodes of the show. While I still think that 2x16 is the show’s strongest finale, season 4 has the strongest finish with 3 amazing episodes in a row. It helps that this is both the stage of the season when we’re past the plotlines about Grounder politics and religion – never my favorite part of the show, though it was better done in season 4 than in season 3 – and where the focus was on what made season 4 so good: human drama and conflict between people and within people’s minds and souls, in the face of the end of the world and an enemy that cannot be defeated: climate change in its most extreme version.

One of the three storylines in 4x11 is the tense standoff about who will be in the bunker and survive, which turns the main characters against each other, including Clarke against Bellamy, but where none of the sides are villainous and everyone has good reasons for what they are doing. The show prides itself on grey morality, but it doesn’t always get it right – this is one of the times it does.

But while that storyline is the usual story of people fighting for survival (for themselves, their loved ones, whoever they consider “their people” – since the morally right goal of saving everyone is impossible), the other two plots are about people who have decided that they don’t want to survive, or who are struggling to decide whether they want to live or not.

It’s also the episode remembered for the first death of a main character who was a part of the original cast at the start of season 1 since episode 2x08. It’s one of the saddest deaths on The 100, but also one of those that felt most unavoidable.

“See you on the other side” is one of those repetitive catchphrases on The 100 that has changed its meaning so much over time Jasper said it several times – I remember that he said it in The Pilot, just about to cross the river (just before he got speared and nearly died), in 3x13 just before drinking the potion that Luna’s people gave him and others so they would lose consciousness before they take them to their oil rig – and he tells it to Monty as he is about to die.

This story of PTSD was done much better than whatever the show was doing with Finn. There is a parallel between Jasper and Octavia in how damaged they were after  to the deaths of their first real love, but while Octavia mostly directed her grief outward into violence and, for a while, murder (an with a dash of death wish), Jasper was only verbally aggressive to others – and more so in season 3 than in season 4 – but his psychological state mostly manifested in his loss of a will for survival.

This storyline is very controversial, from the fans who started hating Jasper and calling him annoying – because the show was honest about the fact that depressed people are not always pleasant to be around – to people who were upset that the story didn’t get an uplifting outcome with Jasper overcoming his problems. But it wouldn’t be realistic if everyone in the show overcome their traumas. In reality, some people just break and stay broken. And I think it’s important to show that, too. It doesn’t make the story hopeless and nihilistic, because, at the same time – and in this very episode – we also get stories of people – Harper, Raven - who do manage to overcome trauma and decide to live.

I’m still glad that the show didn’t go with their original idea – Jasper shooting himself in the season 3 finale, right after he wrote his suicide letter. Not just because his death would have been overshadowed by other deaths that season, and because it would’ve made season 3 way too dark, but also because, in a way, his season 4 arc and suicide was less bleak, odd as that may sound. Season 3 Jasper was focused on his pain, anger and despair, while season 4 Jasper was reconciled with the idea he would die, and focused on going out having some fun before his death.

I also think it would be very unrealistic if, in the face of such bleak future – probable death of radiation or years of possibly awful life stuck in a bunker – at least some people wouldn’t make the decision to live out the rest of the days with an end-of-the-world party and go out in their own time, at their own choice and in a more pleasant way, such as overdosing of drug-like tea. And knowing how things turn out in the rest of season 4 – and that most of them would probably be condemned to death of radiation, anyway – and how horrible the life in the bunker ended up being (and that it took the lives of almost 400 out of the 1200 people), I can’t really say that those who stayed behind in Arkadia and committed suicide made a wrong choice, even if it’s not a choice I would make.

Jasper’s death scene, his last moments with Monty, is beautiful and heartbreaking. But I still didn’t cry during that scene in this rewatch, which surprised me. Then I was even more surprised when the tears only came later when Monty found out that Harper was alive and she told him she loved him, which she had tried to deny before, because she wanted Monty to leave her and not risk his life for her. I think it’s because, for tears, you need some kind of catharsis, a relief, and there is nothing like that in Jasper’s death scene. It’s like watching the Buffy episode The Body – similar to dealing with deaths of people close to you in real life, where you’re just frozen and you’re not getting any kind of closure or seeing any kind of meaning. Monty keeps fighting and trying to stop Jasper from killing himself even after it is already too late, or getting angry that he can’t do anything about it anymore. because it’s not in Monty’s nature to give up hope. And that’s why he doesn’t even say “I love you” when Jasper asks him to, until it is too late and Jasper cannot hear it anymore, because to say it would mean to accept his death.

Monty has lost so much at this point – having to kill his mother twice, now losing his best friend who was like a brother to him, that the moment when he thinks that Harper is dead (seeing a dead body of a blonde woman, who turns out to be Bree), and then realizes that Harper is alive was such a big relief both because of Harper and because Monty has managed to save someone he loves, and his arc is not all grief and darkness.

Oh, the times when Raven used to be really a main character and had a great arc about struggling with her pain, disability, and (temporary) loss of mental functions! (I love season 6 and it may end up as my favorite season, but it pretty much made Raven a side character and didn’t do her too many favors.) Though the Raven episode most often compared to 6x07 Nevermind is 3x11 Nevermore (because of the similar title and same writer), Raven’s story in 4x11 actually is more similar to Clarke’s story in 6x07: it’s an internal struggle where she is deciding whether she wants to live, and where she talks to dead characters, who are actually embodiments of parts of her own mind, pulling her in different directions and fighting for her soul. Here they are “Becca”, tempting Raven to die, because a part of her doesn’t believe she can still be the brilliant mind who solves all the problems – and “Sinclair”, who helps Raven find hope and fight to live, and come up with a solution how to heal her brain. She does it by basically “rebooting” herself through temporary “death” – which is similar to how Gabriel brought back Clarke in 6x10. Considering the fact that Sinclair is just a product of Raven’s mind, it’s a bit funny when he tells Raven that she shouldn’t compare herself to Da Vinci and Mozart etc. because she’s better than all of them – but I guess Raven is imagining Sinclair as giving her huge amounts of praise in order to give her faith in herself. He was always the mentor/friend who gave her a chance to work as a mechanic on the Ark and believed in her even when she didn’t believe in herself.

The bunker drama

I wasn’t happy with the way 4x10 put Clarke is a pseudo-antagonist role, by focusing on the Conclave (an incredibly stupid way to resolve the question of survival of the human race) with Octavia as the hero, and making the viewers forget what the situation was when Clarke made her decision. Add to that that she is pitted against Bellamy, and that she is siding with Jaha, and you have all the ingredients for the fandom to see Clarke as a villain. But in fact, her decision made most sense in the circumstances – not only was Octavia realistically unlikely to win, but the most likely outcome was that Luna would win and doom the entire human race to die. But this episode corrects that and explains her reasons – and that they are different from Jaha’s. Once that the news comes that Octavia has won and decided to share the bunker – which was Clarke’s suggestion that all the Grounder leaders ignored in 4x09 – the situation changes completely, and it’s obvious that Clarke, who already didn’t feel good about what she was doing, started having doubts, while Jaha was very sure that what they were doing was right, and insisted that it’s all about saving their people.

Clarke, on the other hand, thinks that Skaikru need to be in the bunker because they are the only ones who can operate machines that ensure such things as air and water in the bunker, so they’re essential for the survival of the human race. Which is true. But sharing the bunker would also solve that. However, at that point, no one is sure if Grounders already know about them stealing the bunker and if they will start killing all of the Skaikru. Bellamy has faith that Octavia can stop it, but not everyone does.

Of course, even if Clarke had good reasons to steal the bunker, the whole thing with kidnapping Bellamy and keeping him there against his will, chained, while he was desperate to save his sister, was another messed up thing to do, and Clarke clearly didn’t feel good about that, either. It’s the understandable why she did it, to save his life, but I’ve never been OK with the “kidnapping/imprisoning you for your own good” thing, whether it was Lexa kidnapping Clarke and keeping her prisoner for a week in Polis, Bellamy handcuffing Clarke to make her prisoner in Arkadia, or Clarke keeping Bellamy chained up.

That said, I’m not sure how certain Clarke was sure that keeping the bunker closed was the right thing to do, either, because when she was explaining her reasons to Niylah, she seemed to really be talking to herself and trying to convince herself, and Niylah was just a sounding board. That relationship always consisted of Niylah being Clarke’s friend who was there to comfort her when she needed some human touch but wasn’t able to turn to anyone she had stronger emotions for – and while they had sex a couple of times in the past, this time Clarke just needed someone to lie beside her and put an arm around her, but when she talked about the reasons, she had her back to Niylah and not even looking at her, but looking somewhere into the distance.

The relationship between Clarke and Jaha is a pretty interesting one, and I wish it had been explored more, but they did do some of it here. He was a close family friend she grew up with, almost an uncle figure, then he became the symbol of everything she hated, the person who executed her father and imprisoned her for a year. Earlier on in season 4, she was still calling him out on what he did to Jake, but then, having to do things like make the list, she started thinking that she was turning into Jaha. In this episode, even though Clarke was the one who came up with the idea to steal the bunker, Jaha was the one who was confident about what they were doing and acted like he was in charge (prompting Bellamy to make the good observation “I don’t remember the election that made you the chancellor again”) convincing the uncertain Clarke that their path was right. It reminded me a bit of the dynamic between Pike and Bellamy in S3.

This whole situation was pretty complicated: on one hand, Clarke was telling herself that she was saving the human race by saving “her people”, but if everything was resolved without bloodshed, sharing the bunker would mean letting more people potentially survive, because the bunker had the capacity of holding 1200 people, while there were just a little over 400 Sky people. So, one could argue that the “big picture” favored opening the bunker ASAP. For Jaha, it was all about “saving our people”. But what does “my people/our people” mean? Everyone defines that according to how they feel. Jaha sees it as the collective of people from the Ark that he feels responsible for – but 1) it’s not like the lives of people from the Ark are inherently more important than the lives of people known as Grounders, and 2) some of those “our people” were not even in the bunker. Kane, Octavia, Raven, Monty would be left to die, among others. On the personal level, who is more “your person” than your lover or child or sibling, or close friend? But Jaha has always had a rather tribalistic vision and cared more as his people as a collective, than the individual people in that group. Kane was the closest thing to a friend Jaha had at this point, but he was OK with leaving him to die. But it was obvious that Bellamy would never agree to leaving Octavia to die, and Abby would never agree to leave Kane. And if Bellamy or Abby were outside the bunker, I’m 100% sure Clarke wouldn’t agree to leave them to die, either. However, after his wife’s and son’s death, Jaha didn’t have anyone he loved so much that he couldn’t sacrifice them. And since he kind of sacrificed his son to the “big picture” – by putting him at risk of death (which kept haunting him), I think that Jaha doubled down on his belief in his messianic role to save the Arker,s and that he had kind of convinced himself everyone else should be able to sacrifice their loved ones to that.

Which is why he didn’t see it coming when Abby stuck a syringe in him and knock him out, to go and help Bellamy go and open the bunker door. I remember that I saw that coming the first time I watched it and even guessed Abby’s reply to Jaha saying that he’s sorry about Kane’s inevitable death: “He was a good man”. – “He still is”. Jaha was also wrong to bring up Jake, because I think that Abby’s guilt over betraying Jake (which led to Jaha executing him – which she did not anticipate) only made her more determined to do differently this time and save Kane and not betray him. Oh, the time when Abby doing things to save Kane was something you could root for and that didn’t cross the line into creepy, misguided and deeply morally wrong!

This is one of the very few times in the show where Abby and Bellamy had significant interactions – even working together. And they managed to fool Murphy.

I love the fact that Bellamy made himself look self-destructive, by injuring himself while chained, only because he had a plan how to get out and open the door.

This is one of the two or three times in seasons 3-4 when Bellamy tells Murphy that he has no idea what it’s like to love someone, and Murphy has to keep explaining that he’s wrong and referencing his love for Emori.

Being focused on the big picture and trying to save the human race, as Clarke was doing throughout season 4, made her have to repress her feelings and almost severed her human connections (e.g. leaving some of her best friends out of the list, stealing the bunker even though some of the were outside and she was leaving them to die). She’s never been more “Head” than in season 4, because she believed she really had to be. But Bellamy was always her one soft spot where her ability to repress emotions for the ‘greater good’ would hit a brick wall. Bellamy (and Octavia, probably because of him) had to be on the list, not because of any objective reasons (which doesn’t mean that Bellamy isn’t very valuable for his leadership qualities, but that wasn’t why she put him there), even when she was leaving out a genius like Monty. We’ll never know if she could have stayed strong if ALIE had tortured/threatened to kill Bellamy (because the show hinted he was her biggest ‘weakness’ but never allowed that to happen), but she did let hundreds of people die in bombing mostly to protect him, she gave up 50 spots for her people to survive, when Roan blackmailed her by threatening to kill Bellamy, which Roan knew would work because threatening to kill Bellamy got Clarke in season 3 to give up fighting and let him take her to what she thought would be her death at Nia’s hands, and now, she was convinced that she was ensuring the survival of human race by not opening the bunker, but she still couldn’t bring herself to shoot him. But even the fact she thought she could do it shows how out of touch with her emotions she was at that point: Girl, I could have told you there’s no way you would be able to.

I’ve always thought – after seeing how the next two episodes of season 4 went (and then the next two seasons confirmed that) – that the moment when Clarke couldn’t shoot Bellamy and ended up crying, was the moment when she finally faced up to how she feels about him, and that she’s been aware of her feelings ever since. (Even if you disagree on that, there is no way you could spend 6 years on her own, radioing him every day, without realizing exactly what you feel.)

In 4x10, Bellamy was worrying that he wasn’t able to tell his sister that he loves her. When Bellamy and Octavia reunite and hug, Bellamy tells her “I love you so much” – which is the first time we’ve ever seen him say “I love you” to someone. To date, Octavia is the only person he’s said it to on-screen.

Octavia exiles Echo – pulling the “I said your people will get to survive, not you” trick, and considering all her experiences with Echo up to that point. I don’t blame her at all. She correctly guesses that Echo won’t tell the other Grounders (other than Indra, who is playing along) that Skaikru stole the bunker, since she will still die anyway. Echo indeed turned out to be more concerned with survival than revenge. 

Timeline: The episode starts two days before Praimfaya, and ends exactly a day before Praimfaya

Body Count: 11 Arkers who killed themselves, including Jasper, Bree, another Delinquent, and Riley.

At least 60 Delinquents have died (4 in season 4), while 40 are still alive. But not for long.

Rating: 10/10

#the 100 #the 100 rewatch #the 100 4x11 #the other side #the 100 season 4 #jasper jordan #raven reyes #monty green #harper mcintyre #clarke griffin #bellamy blake #thelonius jaha #abby griffin #octavia blake #niylah #john murphy #bellarke #bellamy x clarke #bellamy x octavia #kane x abby #kabby

[deafwestnewsies]

All I’ve Ever Owned

Orpheus and Eurydice find a way, because that's what Orpheus and Eurydice do.

read it on ao3 and ff.net here! 

Orpheus stood hesitantly at the doorway. A shop functioning in the rundown part of town that stood gleaming and tall was surely a sign that it couldn’t be trusted, right? He was used the creaky window-doors with little bells that ding!-ed in your arrival, hole in the wall dumplings, a bank that was family owned. Never did he dare to cross by Underground Pawn, with the copper plating and old-fashioned lamps on the storefront. No signs, just a hand painted name on the front door and business hours. (8am-6pm Monday through Sunday.) There was never a need to visit the store, never an item he needed to scrounge for, never an heirloom he could trade for quick cash. Sure, there was a time a few years back when he had to make a serious plea to the local bodega owner so he didn’t starve half to death, but young Orpheus was a natural born charmer. His mother would always chide that ‘Your wink and a smile could take you a mile, dear.’ Unfortunately, he was in a new situation that couldn’t really dazzle his way out of. 

Fate, it turns out, could be awfully mean. When his landlord, a mysterious man who went only by Hermes and wore polished wing-tipped shoes, rapped on his door a week earlier and told him that the building would be torn down in a month’s time, Orpheus experienced a new type of panic. Hermes clapped him on the shoulder (“It’ll be alright, son.”) and for the first time, the bags under his eyes seemed more prominent, the furrowed brow showing deep worry lines. It occurred to the young man that he might’ve been losing an apartment, but Hermes was losing his livelihood. 

So Orpheus wrote the old man a lovely poem and Eurydice baked him a strong attempt at what could be considered a cake, and the young couple went about packing up their small apartment. Heartbreaking couldn’t begin to describe it all, taking down the small sketches Eurydice managed to leave everywhere she went, the well-used pots and pans going into boxes, a threadbare bedspread being folded carefully. This had been their home for years. Originally, Eurydice’s, since she bought it at only fifteen years old. Not even able to legally sign the lease, the young girl with nothing but a trench coat riddled with holes on her back thrust the first three months rent into Hermes’ hand without explanation. The rent kept coming and she was a steady source of laughter in the man’s world, so he kept her around. At eighteen, a boy entered her world and became her solar system. She would sometimes steal looks at him from across the room when he wasn’t paying attention, just to see the steady breath drawing from his chest. The restless fingers, drumming every surface. The crinkle of his nose when he yawned. She looked at Orpheus like he had hung the stars in the sky just for her. 

Even today, at twenty years old, the magic had not faded. Although they were still young, there was no spring in their step. The amount of toil and stress they had endured showed in minuscule ways, like when Orpheus would start biting his nails whenever the bills came in. And yet there was still undying love between the two, a fire that no one could even attempt to put out. Which is why Orpheus, for the last five months, had been planning to ask Eurydice to marry him. 

It wouldn’t be elaborate, but it would be enough. With a bottle of their favorite strawberry wine and some candles, Orpheus would ensure that Eurydice would never have to worry about facing the world alone ever again. Which led to the specific problem at hand. 

Every apartment in the city was far too expensive for the pair of artists. They could probably afford a room in a boarding house, if a boarding mistress would even let a space to a couple of ‘downright sinners.’ (Taken straight from the words of their next door neighbor.) Rent was simply too much everywhere they turned. However, Orpheus had a plan. A plan that had him joining the waitstaff at a local diner and standing outside of this shop, this awful pawn shop with the domineering walls and unwelcoming storefront. Orpheus curled his fist around the small box inside of his pocket and pushed the door open before his nerves turned him the other way. 

The telltale soft jingle of a bell rang out in the otherwise dead quiet store. No- not dead quiet. Someone had a jazz record playing in a back room somewhere. Shelves upon shelves of items stretched out in front of the boy, baseball gloves and valuable coins and things that people just couldn’t afford to buy back. Orpheus plucked the string of a particularly handsome harp, set with golden scenes of ancient greek myths. It was missing a few strings, however. All but seven. 

He kept moving throughout the store until he finally reached a glass countertop with a mess of jewelry. Grandma’s pearls, ruby earrings that would stretch your ears, impressive diamonds. A small bell waited patiently. Ring for assistance. 

Green fabric and black buckled shoes swept into the picture and flashed a grand smile at him. She was what most would call an aging beauty, but she certainly was striking. Her hair seemed to spill out from underneath her pillbox hat, flowing and tumbling down in a loose braid. Crows feet and laughter lines only made her more beautiful and lively. The bright red lipstick and high cheekbones finished her face off, creating one of the most alluring women Orpheus had ever seen. He was so busy staring that he almost missed the first sentence. 

“What can I do for you, dearie?” Her rough voice rang out through the quiet. It was low and enchanting and made Orpheus itch for a pen and paper. 

He swallowed hard and pulled out the small box from his pocket. The blue velvet had almost rubbed away, but the true treasure was inside. A small, ornate ring set with emeralds and pearls. His dead mother’s ring. Eurydice’s would-be engagement ring. “How much can I get for this?” He asked, his voice barely above a whisper. 

The woman stared at him for a second, her gaze piercing as they made direct eye contact. “Are you sure you want this priced?” She asked, never breaking the stare. He finally looked down, breaking the tension. Orpheus’s eyes burned as he looked at the ring. A small nod followed. She sighed heavily, patting his hand resting on the countertop. “I’ll grab the king for ya.” 

Orpheus didn’t even bother questioning the odd nickname and just welcomed the silence once again. His ears strained to hear the melody once more, but it seemed as if someone had turned off the record. He ached to hear the music again.

Instead, a man in a large black trench coat slowly stepped out. He couldn’t have been much taller than Orpheus, but the overall presence was far too controlling. It was clear who had been in charge of decorating the store front. “So.” The man got directly to business. “You’d like this ring priced.” 

“Yes sir.” The words escaped his throat by an act of the gods. 

The man picked up the ring and held it up to the light. A long stretch of anxious waiting occurred while he inspected it from every angle, letting the stones glint light at any given chance. Once, Orpheus and his mother didn’t have much, just a meager home and some worn-down worldly possessions, but Calliope took pride in her beautiful ring. She would tell anyone who listened that it was from a king of great power, a gift when they found out that she would bare his offspring and give him the next ruler. He died, however, and left her with a newborn baby and a tale to tell. As Orpheus grew older he realized that there was nothing true in her carefully spun story of tragedy and greatness. In fact, Calliope probably didn’t know who Orpheus’s father was at all and the ring was probably a family heirloom. Orpheus was probably not left scarred when he figured all of this out. 

He let all of this flash through his mind as the man carefully put the ring back into its box. “I can give you five hundred and fifty for it.” 

“No.” Orpheus burst out, surprising himself. “No, I need seven hundred. Please.” 

The man raised one heavy eyebrow at him and stared at the ring. “Six hundred. My final offer.” 

The apartment they had managed to find was seven hundred dollars a month. They had one hundred and thirty six dollars in their savings. “Okay,” Orpheus winced. “Six hundred.” 

He nodded and started to scribble on a pad of paper. “Persephone!” He called out. The beautiful woman came back, skirts swishing around her ankles. “Please ring the boy up. Six hundred, final.” 

“Six hundred?” Persephone asked incredulously. The man shot her a look that scared even Orpheus, but she looked like she truly could not have been bothered. Rolling her eyes, she punched a few numbers into an ancient cash register. “Hades, the register is short two hundred.” He lowered his glasses and looked over the contents of the drawer. Counting out the money, Hades nodded slowly and then disappeared around the corner. “If it was up to me kid, you’d be getting a hell of a lot more for that ring,” she muttered. 

Orpheus’s face burned. He knew that it was worth more, that it was old and well kept and that somebody would pay good money under the right circumstances, but as went the old adage: Beggars can't be choosers. “Thank you, ma’am.” He said softly, staring still at the ring. 

Too soon, Hades was back and handing Orpheus an envelope filled with cash and a ticket that read 003. “You have thirty days. If you’re not back by then, I have a legal right to sell this to any customer that wishes to buy at the price that I will set.” With a final swish of the coat, the man left to the back rooms. After the metaphorical dust settled later on, Orpheus would think about what a curious encounter he had had with Hades. 

Tears gathered in the corners of his eyes as he pushed the ring box over to Persephone. She held it up to the light and watched it shine with delight in her eyes. Orpheus couldn’t help but notice the band of gray steel wrapped around her ring finger. He thought of a beginning to a poem. He knew it would never be finished. 

Orpheus quickly wiped the wetness in his eyes away as she placed the ring under the counter, now shining among all of the other jewels. Persephone gave a small smile and held his hand for a fast second. “I’m rooting for you, kid. Be back in thirty days.”  

Grandma’s pearls, ruby earrings that would stretch your ears, impressive diamonds. A dead mother’s ring joined the cherished and forgotten. 

&&&

They both had worked so hard over the past month. Orpheus never told Eurydice where he had gotten the sudden influx of money, but she trusted him when he told her that he would take care of it. 

Somehow, they managed to put down the first month’s rent and make friends with their newest landlords, three women who seemingly moved in sync and knew each other’s thoughts before they could say it aloud. Eurydice adored them. Orpheus wrote a few poems about them. They got a tray of what a kind-hearted person would call brownies and an envelope stuffed with diner napkins and scraps of paper, addressed to The Fate Sisters. 

By the end of the month, Orpheus was almost electrified with anticipation. He pulled Eurydice out of the diner door and straight to the bus stop. “‘Pheus? Where’re we going?” Eurydice asked, laughing. He didn’t respond, just pulled her in and kissed her deeply. She smiled into his lips for a moment before pulling away. Orpheus was always the more fond of the two when it came to showing physical affection. 

The bus left them in the middle of the main street, and he had to hold himself back from running straight to Underground Pawn. Orpheus anchored himself to the young girl’s hand as they strolled to the store, her questioning where they were going the entire walk over. A knowing smile played on his lips, but he didn’t dare disclose the secret. He couldn’t wait even a second longer. Forget the wine, the candles, forget the little details that in the end, didn’t truly matter. The second he had the ring back, he would propose to Eurydice. And it would be perfect. 

The bell ding!-ed their arrival and once again, an old jazz record played in a room they couldn’t see. Orpheus hoped that the lady (Persephone?) was swaying softly to the music and trying to lure her stately husband in. He knew that the man would never join the dance. 

Orpheus rang the little silver bell and nearly jumped with excitement when Persephone walked over to the back of the counter. Today she wore a deep blue blazer that had puffy sleeves and a matching pair of cigarette pants. A single red carnation was tucked into her wild curls. Her eyes lit up when she recognized the boy and she reached down to grab the box from its place in the cabinet. “You’ve returned!” She called out, joyfully. 

“I did indeed.” Orpheus responded, a blush crawling up his neck. He put down the envelope and opened it up, handing her the money he owed. “This is Eurydice, and if you’ll hand me that box, I’ll soon be able to call her-” 

“Now hold on a moment, Persephone,” a voice boomed out. Eurydice, already confused, (but slightly delighted, she had an idea of what was to come) jumped at the deep sound. She stared in wonder at the man with the all black suit, a single red carnation tucked into his breast pocket. As both Persephone and Orpheus froze at the sound of his voice, Eurydice couldn’t help but wonder what having that much power would be like. Just as soon as she thought it, Orpheus tightened his grip on her hand and brought her back to reality. 

Hades crossed his arms. “Now I thought I made it clear, young man. Thirty days.” 

Orpheus knitted his brows together. “It has been thirty days.” 

“July thirtieth to August twenty ninth is not thirty days. If my math adds up, which it does, that’d be thirty one days.” Orpheus felt his heart sink as Hades took the ring and placed it back into the display case, this time under the section that did not read Not For Sale. “If you’d like it back, son, it’ll be fifteen hundred.” 

“Hades-” Persephone started, but he silenced her with a wave of his hand. 

“You signed the contract.” Hades stated, the finality in his tone. 

Eurydice tugged on Orpheus’s arm. “‘Pheus, let’s just go. It’s okay.” He grabbed her hand and held it tight. 

“Is there any way you can make an exception?” He asked, his tone pleading. 

Maybe Eurydice imagined it, but there was a hint of glee when Hades shook his head and swept himself out of the room. Persephone let her shoulders drop for a second, and suddenly the crows feet and laughter lines didn’t seem as beautiful to Orpheus. Maybe they were frowning lines, too. Maybe she wasn’t simply an enchantress. Maybe Persephone had her share of struggles too. 

“I’m really sorry, kid.” She sighed, all three of them staring at the box. “Do you at least want to see it?” Persephone directed the question toward Eurydice, who’s eyes widened at the suggestion. 

“No.” She answered simply. There was no point in wishing for something you couldn’t have. Tugging on Orpheus’s hand, she began to explore the shelves of items, picking up collectible mugs and laughing at the signed pictures of people she did not recognize. He followed behind her, solemn and dragging his feet. 

What would his mother have thought? 

Finally they came upon the entry of the store, where Orpheus would have to walk out without a ring, a fiancee, or any hope at all. “Orpheus, look!” Eurydice called out. She was staring at the harp, trying to name all of the stories etched on the surface. “...and I think that one is Apollo and-” 

“Let’s buy it.” Orpheus breathed. The price tag read two hundred, but the smile on her face made it priceless in his eyes. Beaming, Eurydice grabbed it off the shelf. 

She dinged the bell a few dozen times before Persephone flew in and slammed her hand over Eurydice’s. “Hun, you’re cute and all, but you gotta not pull that shit.” She raised an eyebrow at the instrument Orpheus was awkwardly holding. “You interested?” 

“Yes.” Eurydice smiled. “We want the harp.” 

Persephone smiled as she began ringing them up. “It’s actually a lyre. Ancient thing, probably needs a good tuning, but real pretty.” The receipt was just a scrap of paper with some confirmation scribbled on it, but it meant that the lyre was actually theirs to keep. “Enjoy it, kids.” Persephone waved the young couple off, her tired eyes watching as they practically ran to the door. She spun her wedding band around her finger as she went to turn the record player back on. 

&&&

The second they got outside, Orpheus ripped a string from the lyre. Eurydice gasped in shock, but watched as he fiddled with the string until it made a neat band. He slowly got down on one knee before swallowing, hard. 

“‘Rydice. I can’t promise you diamonds and pearls, but I swear to the gods that you will never be alone. You will always have someone to fight for you, no matter the situation, no matter the battle, no matter the enemy. I will stand by your side through rain and snow, and tempers and fights. Some days we might starve. Others we might freeze. But I promise to never let the outside world in. I promise they will never get close enough to hurt you. I can promise all of these things if you promise to be my wife.” Orpheus thought for a moment. “Hell, I’ll protect you with my dying breath even if you say no. I love you, Eurydice.” 

She took him by the shoulders and stood him up. Eurydice kissed him like it was her last chance. The lyre lay next to them, momentarily forgotten. 

&&&

“Wait. What are we gonna do with this?” Eurydice asked, holding the lyre and eyeing the remaining six strings. “It’s broken.” 

Orpheus picked it up and carefully looked it over. He started to pluck a melody out, slowly and carefully. 

“I’m sure we’ll be able to make use of it.” The repeated music became more sure and steady under his nimble fingers. “Lover, when I sing my song…” 

um i'm proud of this one. also please leave a comment and i will go to hell for you when the king of hell basically steals you and strike a deal with the king of hell but at the last minute i do the exact thing that i wasn't supposed to do and i have to leave you in hell. anyways please rb.

#hadestown #hadestown musical #hadestown on broadway #hadestown off broadway #orpheus hadestown #orpheus #eurydice hadestown #eurydice #orpheus and eurydice #orphydice #Persephone #persephone hadestown #hades #hades hadestown #hades and persephone #hadestown fanfic #hadestown au #my writing

[aaronobrian]

Re-thinking Star Wars: The Last Jedi

Last night my kids and I sat down to watch the Last Jedi. After a little squabbling on what movie to watch we decided on The Last Jedi. This would be the fourth time I have watched this movie. I wasn’t really excited about seeing it again, only as a way for us all to relax for the evening. I was never that impressed with story of the Last Jedi, especially some of the story arcs. I have not changed my mind on all of these issues. You can read them here. But there are a few on this last viewing that has changed.

1.) Put a shirt on Kylo... The connection between Rey and Kylo Ren. I first read their interactions through time and space as the doing of Snoke and the movie playing up a odd romantic relationship between them. But it occurred to me that Rey and Kylo are opposites. They are like the Chinese philosophy of Yin and Yang.  Yin and Yang is defined as “concept of dualism, describing how seemingly opposite or contrary forces may actually be complementary, interconnected,  and interdependent in the natural world, and how they may give rise to each other as they interrelate to one another.” If you remember the symbol of Yin and Yang, it looks like a black and white fishes with a white eye in the black fish and a black eye in the white fish. This helps these dueling characters to understand each other. With that explained, I see Kylo Ren and Rey as the same concept. Kylo Ren is evil, committed himself to the dark side. Yet, there is a light side within him. He can’t bring himself to kill his mother Leia. He has an odd affection towards Rey (later asking Rey to join him). Kylo is Ben Solo the offspring of the best of the last generation. All the cunning of Han Solo and the Skywalker blood line with the power of the Force. Where Rey is the exact opposite, she comes from nothing and has nothing. Her parents were nobodies, no noble lineage, that abandoned her. She led a hard life growing up as savager of junk with no guidance, no love, no direction given to her, unlike Ben Solo. Yet Rey is kind and caring and is drawn to the light side of the Force. But her “black dot/eye” is her grit that was deeply learned from her hard life. And there is the aspect of her answering the call of the Dark Side. She went into the Dark Side cave and found nothing but herself. And if the Force is an active player in the Star Wars story, then for every rise in the Dark side that has to be an equal rise in the Light side like Snoke had said. The raw power on Kylo is then met with the pure power from Rey. (Which leads me to believe that Rey and Kylo might be brother and sister. Or maybe Rey is cloned from other Jedis? I could be wrong, but it is a pet theory.)  

2.) Luke Skywalker (or the heartbreak of every Gen Xer) We have seen this before.  Obi Wan Kenobi living far away on Tatooine watching over Luke. The same as Yoda hidden away on Dagobah. Both not rebuilding the Jedi Order or fighting against the Empire. When we see Luke he has closed himself off from the Force. He is unwilling to train Rey or join Leia and the Resistance against the First Order. This is a BIG disappointment in Luke for many who grew up as our hero. A hero that saved his father, even after Vader killed his teacher, killed his Aunt & Uncle (by proxy), maimed him, and turned him over to the Emperor. Luke did not give up. He was always optimistic no matter how grim the situation was. When Rey finds him on his lonely island, he has lost all of that aspect of his character.  This is what is unbelievable to those of us that grew up with this character. This was maybe the hardest pill to swallow in TLJ.  Luke has a new philosophy about the Force, it is not “ours to control”. There is a bit of truth to that in life as well as the Force. You can’t control people or every event in your life. Some things you have to “let go” and let them work themselves out. That things resolve themselves for the better and hope that Martin Luther King, Jr. was correct when saying “The arc of history is long, but it bends toward justice.” Luke saw the raw power and darkness in Ben Solo and it scared him. And which ever iteration of how Luke and Ben clashed in his bedroom you believe in, this event shook Luke to his core. Like Obi Wan thought that he could instruct Anakin just as well as Yoda and he was wrong. Luke failed Ben as a teacher. Ben had too much of the Dark Side and Luke could not change him like he could with his father. All of this is made Luke into a hermit. And if Luke was an ordinary guy, then we could all say, hey man you tried your best.” But this is Star Wars! Luke is a hero! Heroes don’t give up! Right? But wait… Is Luke right? This battle of the Light and Dark Side has gone on for thousands of years. Jedi and Sith battling for dominance for thousands of generations. Luke looks at that long “arc of history” and thinks this isn’t working. The Jedi Order was too rigid. There has to be another way, a better way. But how can that happen when the Sith don’t care but to gather all the power. Like a seesaw the Force becomes unbalanced if only the biggest kid sits on the one side. There is three or four options … 1) Keep things the same. The Light and Dark battle it out forever. (As we have see for the last 8 movies.) 2) Let one side become so powerful that there is a schism and the powers re-balance themselves 3) Let one side become so powerful that there is a mutation and different type of Force is invented. 4.) Let the Force alone and maybe the Force will be distributed equally throughout the galaxy. Either way, the Dark Side will prevail for a period. And like the Manhattan Project, or the Race for Artificial Intelligence is might be better for us never to touch these civilization ending technologies. But it would be far worse if the Soviets or China won these races. So we press on because the outcome could become too unthinkable. And so is the same as in Star Wars. I don’t have an answer to all this. But I agree that Luke has a point here and it is worth considering.  Which leads me to my next thought… 3.) “Let the past die.” Okay - I still have issues with Rey’s control over the Force with little training. It doesn’t make a lot of sense. But maybe Rey is like a virtuoso genius? We have all seen a child 4 years old playing piano. So MAYBE it is possible. With that said, the whole point of TLJ is to subvert the old order. Luke wants to end the Jedi Order. Rey has no Master. Kylo kills Snoke and asks Rey to join him. And on the surface many of us think, “no this is not Star Wars.” But with more movies coming down the pipeline the formula needs to change or it will become repetitive.  And if Luke was right, this Jedi/Sith battle is not working and it never will resolve itself. Let’s find another solution. Maybe it is time for a new path. And maybe TLJ is the first step on this road.

4.) Kylo Ren’s Fear Lastly, I have reconsidered Kylo Ren. As I recall I called Kylo’s character “a whiny bitch”. But the last scene, showing Luke staring down at Ben Solo and ignites his lightsaber Ben has a look of pure fear in his eyes. I have seen that look in my children eyes and even my dog’s eyes. I realized that like Anakin, Ben’s seduction to the Dark Side is through fear. And instead of helping Ben through his fear it is ignored by Luke. Thus Ben Solo turns to the Dark Side by unfortunately Ben is trying to be someone else -- Darth Vader. We see Kylo is trying to be Vader in the last 2 movies. But like anyone trying to be someone else it can never be achieved. You have to find yourself and follow your only path. This time I pity Kylo. A boy that never felt safe and was never guided out of his fear. Trying to be someone else for everyone else. It is a pathetic existence. He sees Rey naturally being herself and succeeding. Rey is living a fulfillment of her own unique life. As Nietzsche said "a wheel rolling out of its own center."  What is unknown is the fulfillment of our own unique lives, the likes of which has never existed in this universe. And you are the only one who can do it.  Rey is doing this. Kylo is maybe discovering that he can’t succeed from the past. He kills Snoke and unshackles himself. Maybe this is his first act of courage.

In closing, this movie might have a deeper meaning behind it. But it killed a lot of sacrificial lambs to get there and thus upsetting the old order. I am the “old order”. I was there in the theater in 1977 as a 3 year old. I saw Luke as quintessential hero. The battle of the Light and Dark Side as a forever war. But if Star War is to continue forward something has to change. I still stand by many of my original statements of this movie. It does suffer from some bad story arcs that go nowhere. But there is more happening in TLJ then what I originally understood.

#star wars #the last jedi

[whirlybirdwhat]

East Sea of Monsters - Chapter 5

Franky starts. to notice some weird shit about his crew.

Read the entire series on Ao3 for better quality and authors notes! Gen, creepy, featuring all of the Straw Hats, multi-chapter story.

“The East Blue has a different nickname to those in the Grand Line, and those who hail it as home have a few… unique traits.”

-----------

Creepy - Franky

Now, Franky had seen some weird stuff. The Franky Family’s weird, Water 7’s weird, hell, he’s weird.

But he has to say, the Straw Hat’s take the cake on how weird, how crazyyou can get.

And he’s not just talking about the way the Captain’s made of rubber, their doctor’s a reindeer, their swordsman wields three katanas (one of them is supposedly cursed), and the latest member of their crew is a talking skeleton.

Nah.

That stuffs pretty SUPER if you ask him, the kind he can roll with.

It’s the other things that get to him.

The creepy things.

-

He first notices these creepythings when he goes into the kitchen to restock his cola and grab a midnight stack after working all night, and finds two pairs of glowing eyes staring at him from a top the counter, accented by a sharp-toothed mouth and far too much glistening red wet stuff for him to handle.

Like a man, he assumes he’s gone far too long without sleep and back tracks out of the room as quickly as he dares before his mind can fool him further.

The eyes follow him every step of the way, and even the thing starts shifting unnaturally to follow him out of the room before Franky gives up on acting SUPER and just sprints away.

The next day he thinks it’s just a nightmare, before realizing he was most definitely awake, his eyes are alwaysperfectly functional, and Luffy just thanked him at breakfast for not ratting his midnight snack out to Sanji.

Hell.

What the fu-

-

Thriller Bark was creepy for a number of reasons, most of them relating to the island itself and its inhabitants – zombies, shadows, ghosts and SUPER talking skeleton dudes – but Franky can handle that.

It’s the othercreepiness that really stands out to Franky, makes him feel like that time before on the ship – the kind that he thinks isn’t real but knows later it most definitely was.

He first notices it as Brook boards the ship. He seems positively delighted to be there, to be among human souls again, but all the same he appears to… lean awayfrom certain members of the crew. Franky would dismiss it if he didn’t know that A) Brook leans towardother members of the crew and B) Luffy, the most welcoming to the skeleton, is the one that makes the skeleton the most nervous.

(Franky is sure that if he asked the man, he would say something along the lines of They make my hair stand on ends – not that I have any hair – Oh wait! I do! Yohohoho!

He doesn’t ask though. He isn’t sure he wants to know what he thinks Brook knows.

But he’s a builder, a shipwright, however. It’s in his nature to poke around for a potential problem.

Not that his crew is a problem, of course.)

The next creepy things he notices are more Zoro related. It’s subtle, wouldn’t really be an eye catcher if Franky hadn’t been looking for it already.

You see – ever since he met the swordsman, he feels as if he isn’t actually seeing all of him at once. There’s always been a haze, sitting about him, as subtle as they come, like a cloud on a misty day.

Seemingly normal, but with a closer look, it’s like it doesn’t match the rest of the world.

So, he keeps recalibrating and recalibrating his eyes, keeps looking for the odd moments when Zoro seems to just – fadefrom existence, like he slips out of sight and just doesn’t come back until one the crew drags him to where he’s supposed to be.

(Franky entertains the thought that maybe this is why he’s always lost but dismisses it almost immediately.)

And here – on Thriller Bark, when life itself is being torn asunder by humans playing devils and gods – that chain tethering him to thisrealm seems to solidify, and the cloud resting about his shoulders fades away…

Leaving Franky to catch glimpses of limbs coated in shiny green scales, and eyes that flicker red from the back of a green head. They wink at him when Franky stares too long, and fade away the next moment, as if there was only ever cropped mossy hair on the man’s head.

The cyborg would think it was Robin’s handiwork if the eye wasn’t distinctly beast like, and Robin concentrating on using a hundred other summoned limbs to defeat an enemy.

The fading veil like thingover Zoro is even pointed out by the monster that has Luffy shadow of all things and that’s when Franky knowsthis stuff isn’t justin his head.

Because if that idiot can say Hey you guys are little demons (meaning it literally, Franky thinks) and why are you so foggy green sword guyand make Robin smile that scary knowing smile of hers, Franky is definitelysane.

He hopes.

However, the creepiest thing by faris Zoro’s smile, toothy, bloody, and with more thirst and death than Franky has ever seen before.

But maybe that’s just Zoro. He can never tell with the guy.

(So yes, Zoro is creepy. And Franky doesn’t like the way when he shouts Three Thousand Worlds!The world seems to split for just a second, as if a man just stepped and sliced through three thousand places at once and still managed to dissect an enemy with three clear strokes of sharp (cursed, haunted) blades.

No - Franky doesn’t like it at all – because, on stormy nights at Water 7, Tom would give in to Franky’s pleas for the scariest stories Tom knew of, as it fit the mood and would be SUPER during the storm, c’mon Tom! and those stories would oft feature tales of a man – a monster – with a dark hole for a heart, and a pitch of tar for a soul.

The man had a penchant for flashing across seas with a single step, havoc in his wake, as if the barrier between realms had no hold on him, as if space bent to his will and not the other way around.

It reminds him of Zoro, sometimes, when he casts a look at the swordsman in battle.)

-

The third incident is, funnily enough, with the third member of the ‘monster trio’, Sanji.

Franky thinks he finally knows why they’re called the monster trio, beyond them being simply ridiculously powerful.

The incident occurs when they are in the New World, after two years of training and a heartbreak so deep it cuts all of them to their soul.

(Franky does not like the rumors of Marineford. They say it was the War of the Best, that only the most powerful walked its bloody path, but Franky has heard that there was more than men fighting there –

And that there was a suspicious plume of fire at Ace’s grave, three days after Luffy rang the bell, a horrific mimicry of the fire that was said to have warred over the dead man’s father’s grave three days after his execution.)

Franky’s finally back in his workshop, with the sound of his crew, his family, surrounding him with a cacophonous yet beautiful noise and a new idea under his hands, and he couldn’t be happier.

But the next bit requires a bit of balancing if he wants to make it work – he has to lift the glass panel into the eye of the ring, but he can only reach it if he uses one hand, leans on his tiptoes, and stretches the other arm out for balance.

In hindsight, he should have added this bit first.

Oh well.

Almost there…. Almost got it – easy, easy alri-

“Franky?”

“AH!”

CRASH!

With a thunderous sound, Franky whacks his had around, turning his head as he does, letting the glass shatter to the floor and nearly hitting the tray of Cola out of Sanji’s hands.

And that wouldn’t normally be odd, Franky can be clumsy especially when he’s focused and someone startles him (he supposes he needs to retrain himself in that regard, before their little… break … Luffy had taken to jumping up on Franky’s shoulders while he was working to see the new creation, and Franky had learned not to startle – Luffy will probably continue to do that again (at least some things stay the same…)) however it’s what happens in that second of chaos that freaks Franky out.

Franky’s hand, big and metal as it is, should have grazed Sanji’s side. But it didn’t – and not because Sanji dodged away either.

Instead, it is as if there was a giant hole in his side, gaping and wide yet perfectly ordinary, so that Franky only touched a black silk suit instead of the skin underneath.

That’s not all – in the flashing second, with as focused as Franky’s eyes were, he could see a wisp of smoke and something sparking flickering from the cook’s pointy mouth, as swirly eyebrows stood out against literal ash-gray skin.

He doesn’t know how to react, doesn’t even know if what he saw was real, only gives a small, high pitched laugh and ‘yeah, what about you? You startled me!’ when Sanji asks if he’s okay.

He sits in a kind of stupor, cold cola held in a metal (shaking) hand as Sanji takes his leave.

What did I just see?

Franky casts a glance at the shattered piece of glass on the ground, and the empty space in the machine it was supposed to go in.

Guess I’ll know soon enough.

-

Thankfully, beyond shadows in the corner of his eyes, weird hazy visions, spooky feelings and flashing eyes in the middle of the night, Franky only has one more major …. freakyevent before he gets the (terrifying) answer he’s looking for.

Nami’s yelling at him for bringing the Watcher (named by Chopper for its big eyepiece after he came down to see if any glass had gotten in his foot after the accident with Sanji) up on deck, as its apparently ‘Too big! I can’t get a proper tan with that in the way!’ and ‘What does it even do’but he doesn’t particularly care.

After all – she’s one of the five reasons he brought the thing up here.

(Brook had been uneasy around her and Usopp too – despite the fact that Usopp was more scared of him, and Nami was a woman (damn bony pervert.)  Both were relatively weak and lacking any freaky power like the Monster Trio had, so it had buggedFranky for ages why Brook was tense around them andthe Monster Trio, but not the cyborg or the talking reindeer.)

He turns the machine on just as a dark cloud passes over the sun.

Suddenly – the world is cold, and dark, and dreary, and Franky knows his eyes look far away as he peers through the lens at his comrades.

Wait, what… what?

They aren’t there – only Robin, sitting on her lawn chair, is.

Instead of the others, Franky views a shapeless form of wind and cloud and bursting yellow eyes, and something crouching in the corner of the deck, feathery, shadowed and whimsical.

It has far too many joints to be human.

Franky pulls away as a smashing, sparking noise emits from his left, and a crashing from his right.

The suns shining on them again, and the chilling song Franky swears he must have heard is already nothing but a distant memory.

Nami’s hand rests on the right side of the machine (is Franky imagining the little claw-like scrapes just before her nails?), denting it gently, while faint smoking (a bullet?– no, it smells far too much like Usopp’s Stars to be that) wisps from the cracks of the mention to his left.

“Franky,” Nami smiles, all knowing and terrifying, as her eyes seem to glow a particular shade of molten gold (weren’t her eyes brown?) “I suggest you stop.”

Usopp looks over and cocks his head like a bird, as if his place hadn’t been filled with feathers a second ago. He doesn’t say anything, and that is somehow scarier than Nami’s words.

“Okay?” She prods.

“Okay,” Franky agrees, and promptly begins to dismantle the machine.

“Good.”

The spare parts find a home in the bowels of the ship where only Luffy treads normally, as Franky can’t stand the sight of them, even if it was good metal (can’t bear to throw them out either, something tells him they’ll cause more trouble in the ocean depths than on the ship).

He feels all cold and empty when he looks at them.

He shouldn’t feel that way on his ship of dreams, surrounding by loving crew members.

-

Robin is the one to finally give him the answer to all the freakiness his crew has going on. He thinks she was amused by it before the Watcher mishap.

(She too avoids the metal when she can. It isn’t like her at all, and it’s the final tipping point in her observation of his interactions with their less… human campanions.)

It’s the day after said mishap and Franky’s still all jittery, feeling like he’s seen something taboo, when Robin glides up to him in the aquarium, where Franky’s relaxing with some Cola Floats (Who knew cola could taste so good with ice cream?).

“Did you know that five of our crew hail from the East Blue? The Going Merry did as well.” She says simply, and hands him an old but cared for book, with pieces of paper – newspaper clippings? And some notes? – sticking out of it. “Read that. Make sure it comes back to me in good condition” She finishes with some grabbing motions, taking Franky back to the time he first joined the crew which results in him nodding vigorously, and the woman disappearing into the hall with a satisfied smile.

The title is East Sea: Devil Waters, and Franky gulps.

Inside, the freakiness is explained, and something in him relaxes with it. At least he knows whythey’re all freaky now, and that all the rumors he’s heard are true.

(His questions are answered and somethings he didn’t even know were strange had an explanation.

He had heard of Klabautermann before, he knew Merry had one, and he knows Sunny does as well. But – this explains the extra presence he felt in Sunny’s hull some days.

He’s glad he created the Mini Merry – who knew ships could have restless ghosts? He’s happy the lamb has a final resting – haunting –place, safe in the cradle of her comrades and out of the ocean’s depths.)

#whirlywrites #whirlywhat #op #one piece #franky #fanfiction #drabbles #roronoa zoro #monkey d. luffy #cat burglar nami #usopp #nami #robin #sanji #going merry #thousand sunny #thriller bark

[kickstartmyheartmc]

Revival: Chapter 2

Word Count: 2,656

Taglist: @fastnfearless, @fandomshit6000, @public-enemy-sixx

               Nothing sounded better than a relaxing day at the spa for your 18th birthday. You were nearing six months at Dottie’s house, and you were just about ready to head out on your own. Over the course of working at Donny’s, nothing suited you better than working six days a week, eight hours a day. This meant more tables, more hourly pay (despite only being $2.14/hour), and less time to sit and think about the future. After listening to Dotty’s advice about planning for the future, you sat down and considered your options, but nothing came to mind. You thought you had your life planned out but turns out it was all fabricated within your own head. You never knew what you wanted to do with career choices, how you wanted to live alone and where, nor did you know how the hell you were going to keep your head afloat while paying the high rent in Los Angeles. Ah, this is what Dottie meant by planning for the future. You shook your head and decided it was a problem to solve later.

               Your mornings started at 10:00 AM every Monday – Saturday. You woke up, took a shower, got dressed in one of the many uniforms you’d acquired, and shuttled yourself to work on quickest Greyhound bus. Watching people interact with each other was always the best part of the ride. Some days there would be women staggering down sidewalks in broken heels or torn jackets, clearly heading home after a long night of partying. On other days, couples strolled down the sidewalk, leisurely chatting after a filling brunch. Some days you were jealous, and others you despised the very idea of a relationship.

               A relationship in itself was not the part you disliked so much as the actual act of going through the pain and heartbreak to get to the one you would be with for the rest of your life. Back home in Florida, it was rare to run into someone that was interested in you as a person since it was a small community and they all knew about what happened with Mom. Once she passed away, nothing was the same. Your friends abandoned you in fear of becoming black sheep and losing their more popular friends; none of the older kids even spared you a glance; even the younger children, the ones that remained friends with a couple of your younger siblings, would not give you the time of day. No one acknowledging your presence when you so desperately needed it hacked away at your identity; maybe that was the reason why you felt the need to start over.

               Starting over was harder than it sounded, especially when homesickness was such a bastard. One day in July, only three months after you arrived in California, you fell into temptation and called home. Jim, the second youngest brother, picked up. “Hello?”

               You smiled instantly. “Hi, Jimmy! It’s Y/N, how’ve you been?”

               The line was silent for a moment. “Y/N? Where did you go?” His voice was strained, as if he had to hold back his emotions.

               “I-I can’t tell you that, but I miss you a bunch.” You sniffled, not realizing your eyes started to water until then. “How is everyone? Are you all alright? Where’s Dad?”

               “He’s working right now.” He paused for a moment, and you heard the shake in his voice when he said, “We’re mad at you. You didn’t have to leave.”

               That felt like a knife through your heart. “Jimmy, I never meant to hurt any of you. I did this for me and my well-being, please understand.” You chewed on your bottom lip, wiping away a tear. “It sounds selfish, but I promise it was for the best… for everyone.”

               There was a bang through the phone, as if Jim slammed it against the wall. “God damn it, Y/N! When you disappeared, he went on a binge and fucking left for three days! We may not be children anymore, but we can’t get jobs yet! We’re stuck with him until we all turn old enough!” You could not see him, but he was clearly crying. It was odd for a 14-year-old teenage boy to show this many emotions. “You abandoned us, just like Mom.”

               Your voice dropped almost an octave. “Don’t you dare compare me to her.”

               “Why not? What’s different between her not being a part of our lives and you just up and leaving? You even had the choice, and still left!”

               Now it was your turn to slam the phone against something; unfortunately, the nearest surface was the glass surrounding you within the phone booth. The glass shattered and left a few open cuts on your hand as you screamed at your brother. “I NEVER wanted to leave, but I had to so I DIDN’T end up like Mom! Good fucking luck, Jim, because Dad will ruin your life like he tried to mine. At least I got out while I could.” With that, you slammed the phone back down, hanging up on your little brother.

               Your hands were shaking as you walked away from the phone booth. You loved Mom and everything she tried to do, but it still hurt to be compared to her because of how she didn’t even try to help herself. After hearing Jim say what he did, your mind raced a mile a minute, efficiently pumping adrenaline through your veins.

               “Sure, Y/N, just call home and casually act like nothing is wrong,” you muttered to yourself, arms crossed to ensure you looked scarier than you actually were. “They’ll definitely just speak without resentment. What do they have to hate you for?” You kept crying while striding down the streets of Hollywood. Stores passed by without a second glance, music coming from some and the sounds of sizzling grills leaving others.

               You stopped in front of a music store with a canopy covering, hoping to sit and bawl your eyes out without interruption. You let your back slide down the brick wall, smudging the light eyeliner you applied only hours later. It was only a few minutes later that the door flew open and smacked you in the knees, effectively causing a scream of pain to emit from your lips. “Fuck!”

               The person who’d swung the door open quickly bent down. “Oh my god, I’m so sorry.” He awkwardly held his hands in front of you, not sure where to place his hands to help you.

               You glared at him. “Fuck off, will you?” You sniffled and stood up, wincing a little from the pain. “You should’ve been more careful.”

               The stranger stood with you and huffed. “I was only trying to help.” He eyed you, his lips curling back into a light sneer. “What were you doing sitting there anyway?” He opened the door to the store and, despite your rude attitude, silently motioned for you to go inside with him. You complied, albeit reluctantly.

               “Long story short, my family sucks and I’m glad I left.” You shivered as the air conditioning hit your skin. “I’m… I’m sorry for reacting the way I did.” You tried to smile at the stranger, but it turned out to be a lost cause because he was turned away.

               “Don’t worry about it. I have my fair share of family shit to deal with.” He turned back around and smiled at you. “What’s your name?” he asked gently.

               “Y/N. What’s yours?” You managed to pull off a real smile this time.

               “Frank. It’s nice to meet you.”

               “Next stop, Sunset Boulevard!” The bus driver’s voice boomed throughout the tin container, jolting you from your memories. You stood up and followed everyone else getting off. A few of them filed into the Whiskey-a-Go-Go, more than likely employees considering it was only 9:50 in the morning. You paced yourself to Donny’s in order to walk through the doors right at 10. While strolling and taking in the scenery of fall time in Los Angeles, you let yourself get lost in your thoughts once more.

               “Frank. That’s an original name.” Your snort indicated the sarcasm underlying your tone.

               Frank shrugged. “It was my dad’s name, but he left when I was three, so I don’t really feel much of a connection to it.” He took a few long strides and quickly positioned himself behind the register. “On that note, welcome to High Hits.” He let his arms open to either side of him, indicating you to look around the store and take everything in. “Is there anything I can get for you today, young lady?”

               You rolled your eyes and sauntered over to the Beatles’ section. “That’s funny.”

               Frank tilted his head inquisitively. “How so?”

               “We’re practically the same age, therefore I’m not ‘young’ to you, I’m just new.”

               “Smart ass.”

               Your head whipped around as you tried to act shocked. “How dare you insult me, a lady, by cursing in my presence.” You went back to flipped through some of their greatest hits and gasped when you saw their 1968 album The Beatles. “Oh my god, a legend.”

               Frank popped up behind you, making you jump a little. “That’s one of my favorites. Wanna listen to it?”

               “Well, yeah, but I don’t see a player in here.” Just then, someone walked into the store and pulled Frank away from you. He shot you a glance and shrugged, as if to say sorry. You sighed and slid the vinyl back into its place, effectively leaving the store in a better mood than when you walked in.

               “Hey, Y/N!” yelled Donny from the kitchen window. “About time you showed!”

               You looked down at your watch. 10:30 AM. Holy shit, you were late. Where had the time gone? “Sorry, Donny! Just have a lot on my mind.”

               “Don’t worry about it, just get this place open for me.” He slipped his head back into the kitchen as the sound of flames on a grill took over the place. You immediately clocked in and got to work.

 It was dinner time rush that same day. Someone didn’t show up for their shift and Donny asked if anyone could cover it, so you opted in for the extra cash. Besides, he promised a free meal on the house and you couldn’t turn down the best burger in town.

               “Order up!” yelled Donny from the window. You lumbered over, piled the three plates on your arms, and rushed over to table 42.

               “Hello, boys,” you said, putting on that dazzling smile. “Here I have an order of blueberry pancakes, a grilled cheese sandwich, and my personal favorite, a cheeseburger supreme without the mayo.” You placed the food down in front of all of them and wiped your hands on your apron. “Is there anything else I can get you—” Your voice cut out as you locked eyes with the one on your right, alone in his side of the booth. “Frank!” You instantly recognized him from the record shop three months ago. The only thing different was he dyed his hair jet black.

               “Call me Nikki,” he said, clearly trying to hold his smile back. “How’ve you been, uh…?”

               Your smile faltered a little bit. “Y/N,” you reminded him, clearing your throat. “Is there anything I can get for you three?” You scanned the rest of the table, carefully examining the other two men there, but neither of them were paying you any mind as they were too busy scarfing down their meals.

               “Don’t mind them,” Nikki said, waving his hand their way. “We just finished performing at the Starwood.”

               “That’s pretty neat,” you said. “I need to get back to work now, but if I have time I’ll come back over.” You flashed him a smile once more and ran off. I wonder what happened to cause him to change his name. You shrugged and got right back to work. Twenty minutes passed by and it felt as if it was only a few seconds. Time may fly when you have fun but working has a whole other concept of time by itself.

               As the night began to slow down, you leaned against the wall and took a deep breath, taking in the restaurant as a whole, wonderful home.

               “See something interesting?”

               You jumped at the sound of someone speaking so close to you that you could feel their breath. You turned and came face-to-face with Nikki. “Jesus, Nikki, what the hell?”

               He chuckled and dug the toe of his boot into the floor. He looked you in the eyes and his breath covered your face, allowing you to detect traces of alcohol. There’s no way he’s old enough to drink, you thought. “Just wanted to hang around and talk to you. Are you done working yet?”

               That caught you by surprise. “U-um, not yet. I still have to finish my side work and front of house duties.”

               “Well, whenever you’re done, you’re invited to the party I’m holding with my bandmates at the lead singer’s apartment.” He smiled, held out a piece of paper with an address on it, and sauntered off. As you examined it, memorizing the address, a customer asked for assistance and you hopped to it, sliding the piece of paper into your apron, destined to be forgotten in a moment’s notice.

 An exhale left your lips as you let the cool October air cover your face while leaving the restaurant. It was an exhausting day, and thankfully Donny said you could have the following day off to rest instead of working like you always did. On the walk home to Dottie’s apartment, you remembered the invitation to Nikki’s party. “Shit,” you hissed, searching in every apron pocket, unable to locate the small slice of paper. You thought you would remember where it was at, but fatigue plagued your memory, making it impossible to form a cohesive thought at the moment. You sighed once more before turning to head home.

               Along the way you spotted a golden retriever laying on a cardboard box, watching everyone walk by with sadness in its eyes. He pulled at your heart strings and you could not resist the urge to stop and check on him. “Hey, baby,” you whispered while crouched beside the dog, petting it on its head. “What’re you doing out here alone?” The dog looked up at you and scooted a little bit closer, silently begging for more connection. That broke your heart.

               “Y/N, why is there a dog behind you?” Dottie asked as you snuck into the apartment—or tried to.

               Your shoulders tensed up and you turned around to face her. “She looked so pitiful,” you complained. “I couldn’t just leave her there.”

               Dottie crossed her arms, taking a firm stance against your weakness. “I’m not allowed to have pets in this apartment, let alone strays. You’ll have to let her go and she’ll need to find her way to someone who can take care of her.”

               “Please, Dottie? I’ll take her to a shelter tomorrow.” You folded your hands in front of your chest, bending your knees a little in order to pull the sympathy out of her. You always wanted a dog, and if you could save this one, it would make you feel that much better.

               Dottie huffed out a “fine” and went back to the dining room table. “But if I find out you don’t take it to a shelter tomorrow, I will evict you both myself!”

               You chuckled. “Thanks, Dottie!” The dog followed you to the guest bedroom, which had evolved into your own room because of the sheer amount of time you’d been there, and made itself at home, taking comfort in the carpeted floors and heating that coursed through the apartment. You gave the dog one last pet before heading to the bathroom to take a nice hot shower and head to bed for the night.

#mötley crüe #the dirt #the dirt fanfic #nikki sixx #tommy lee #mick mars #vince neil #revival #revival: chapter 2 #chapter 2