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lorelune · 5 months

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lobotomy commission

|| jing yuan x gn!reader || T || love sick hopefully lovers || wc: 3.9k || ao3 ||

The Xianzhou Alliance has... never allowed lobotomies? Why are you so insistent on receiving one?

(The General, the Divine Foresight.)

minors, antis, and ageless blogs dni

a/n: oh mister general jing yuan you have me so damn heart eyes. here's a lil sweet treat!!!!

CW: fluff, friends to lovers, jing yuan being a bit silly, alcohol consumption, FLUFF, a bit of crack being taken seriously

"Lady Fu, I need to be put down." Your cheek hits the low table. You feel pathetic. It's a Thursday and you're teary-eyed after far too little wine to be in such a state. You sniffle.

"No one is 'putting you down'!" Fu Xuan huffs from the other side, patting your arm. "It's rare that you’re this mopey. What’s troubling you?"

"I am not 'mopey'. I need a lobotomy. Which of the commissions would handle this procedure?"

Lady Fu frowns, clicks her tongue, and sighs your name, “A lobotomy, really?

"Yes, exactly. As soon as possible, preferably.” You down the rest of your cup and restlessly flip your phone screen up.

"This is particularly pathetic. Stop drinking and wallowing and just tell me what's wrong."

"Fu Xuan, you will scold me." You push yourself up on the table and shake your head. "No, actually, you will fire me. You will send me to my office this very instant, force me to pack up my things, and turn in my permissions. I'll be out of a job. Then, I'll be homeless. then—"

"No, nuh-uh, no more dramatics!" Fu Xuan slaps a hand over your mouth. You're glad you’re seated in a private corner of the bar, as this is a rather pathetic display on both of your parts. "Please just tell me, what’s the matter?”

Your dilemma.

"I like the General."

Fu Xuan frowns, expression pinched, and her hand falls heavily onto the table. "That... isn’t exactly new information? Even if it’s a... questionable call of taste, the general is handsome. Occasionally charming when he isn’t being an oaf on purpose. I don’t think having a bit of a crush on the Divine Foresight is anything unusual. Half of the population of the Luofu holds the same opinion.

“Okay, but,” you unlock your phone, a ceramic, cat-shaped charm swinging from the vase as you wobble. “What if the General were to return my feelings? And he invited me for a walk and a meal tomorrow evening?”

Fu Xuan's jaw drops. "You're joking."

"I'm not,” you whine and slide your phone across the table.

...

Divine Foresight 🦁:

Are you free tomorrow evening? I know a terrace that has a splendid view of the overlook near the Cinnabar Eyeline. I would be delighted to take you to it and share a meal after,

Divine Foresight 🦁:

If you'll have me :3c

...

“Oh... wow.” Fu Xuan looks shocked. It’s hard to shock her, but she does tend to avoid divining the destiny of those she is close to (unless entirely necessary.) Her intuition regardless of mathematics and astral geometry is, however, keen. Yet her eyes are wide and she struggles to gather her words. “What a menace.”

“I know.”

“The General is rarely so forward. I’ve never heard of him being so forward.”

“I know.”

“Except, perhaps—”

“With me?” You rub your cheeks. They’re warm from the wine.

“Only you. Though this is particularly... telling. I’m sure it’s sincere.”

“I would agree.” Your stomach flutters, and you swallow the feeling down.

Fu Xuan narrows her eyes and says your name, mouth in a thin line, "You haven't replied."

“And that’s why I need the lobotomy.” You swallow. “I’m going to turn him down.”

“WHAT?!”

You need another drink.

Fu Xuan clearly does not. Her cheeks flush rosy pink as she slaps her hands on the low table. “Why would you reject him? Even if he’s a scoundrel— he is genuine.”

“I know, that’s why I can’t accept his... proposition.”

Despite knowing that Jing Yuan serially denies any potential suitors or daring admirers. You know that it has always been like this— from the time long ago when he first gained rank, to his ‘withered age’ as he self-deprecating refers to himself now. He is always kind about his rejections, you’ve witnessed one or two of them, but he never even entertains the idea of romantic partnership. You’ve never heard him mention it or any desires.

So, for him to so bluntly ask you on a date—

He couldn’t be more clear with his feelings.

“You’re a fool.”

“Now, you’re getting it.” You pour yourself another glass of plum wine. Your shared bottle is nearly empty. “This is why I need the lobotomy.”

Fu Xuan watches you drink your glass in a single go. Her brows are pinched and her arms are crossed. Her shoulders sag a moment later.

“I do believe I understand your reasoning, and I don’t think it’s lobotomy-worthy.”

“... High praise.”

“[Name].”

“Alright, alright. I’m sorry.” You laugh behind your palm. The world feels sticky and bouncy, all at once. You crave the respite of your own bed. “I can’t accept his proposition in the form of a text. I mean, Lady Fu, he's the most powerful man on the Luofu. He is renowned in all fields of battle, strategic, and social graces. He’s kind. He probably like, kisses babies on Sundays at the markets."

"He does not."

"You never know!" You groan. "That's all to say that I won't accept an invitation to a date with this little effort put into it."

"... Because it's a text?"

"Because it's a text." You nod.

Fu Xuan pauses, then sighs.

“I can’t decide if that makes you a fool or not.” Her hair is frizzing up with the humidity. "Perhaps you have a point, the General is old enough to know and have some decorum when going about these things."

"Maybe he's a virgin? But like, for dating."

"I'd have to check... certain records. Archives. To confirm or deny that."

You wilt, “He probably isn’t. I’m being foolish.”

“No, you’re not.” Fu Xuan smooths a hand over your cheek with a frown.

"Lady Fu," you cry and wish you were at home. In bed. Maybe you should block his number. "You're supposed to say, 'You absolutely are, my most beloved junior, I will schedule your lobotomy and—’"

"No more talk of lobotomies, please."

"Fine, fine." you sigh and finish off your final cup as Lady Fu does as well. "Do you think I'm nuts for turning him down?"

"... No, I don't." Fu Xuan looks shy for a moment. A lot more human than her lofty station implies. "I don't doubt that... Jing Yuan has feelings for you. I see how he looks at you. But he ought to romance you a bit. A text is low effort. You should reply regardless though."

"I'm going to, I just needed some courage. And moral support." You give her a soft smile and tap back into your messages. Fu Xuan practically crawls around the table to your side. She leans her head on your shoulders and her eyes droop. You take a heavy inhale, then exhale, attempt to focus your blurry vision and craft.

...

You:

General, though I'm flatered by your offer, I will need to decline. Though I will ackknowledge what I would imagine (and hope)) to be your genun

You:

geuine

You:

gennuie

You:

genuine

You:

feelings, I cannot accept an invitation in the form of a text message. I must be wooed.

You:

lady Fuu says "if you are capable of such things"

You:

pls don't fire her she's a good boss and so nice

You:

[picture from XX/XX/XXXX @ 2:14 AM]

...

The next morning is hell. Hell. You wished you had undergone your requested lobotomy. It certainly feels like someone has stuck metal rods into your brain, with the migraine pounding the back of your eyes. Maybe a hangover this bad is somewhat equivalent to a lobotomy. Your memory of your night prior is... cloudy, to say the least. Your tongue feels heavy in your mouth as you manage to down a glass of water and a handful of peachy-colored pills. You speed walk to the Divination Commission, shooting Fu Xuan an apologetic “sorry, running late, forgive me 🙏" text.

You mentally pat your drunk self on the back. After you sent your... rejection (ouch) to the General, you muted his messages and deleted the thread. No evidence, no way to feel awkward about it sober. And no way to dwell on it either. Besides, you hardly remember what you said to him after your last glass of wine. It’s hazy in your memory.

It was... perhaps a foolish way to go about things. You certainly could have approached the General and talked about it, but he sometimes spoke in circles about matters of the heart. Maybe... maybe you felt too fragile to dance that dance, if it came to that. Maybe, you were a bit overwhelmed by his invitation. You know all too well that he does not let himself be pursued. He does not pursue others.

You feel blind-sided by the whole thing.

But that doesn’t matter— because you cleanly rejected him and your only repercussion is a hangover that you’re sure Fu Xuan is twinning.

And besides, it’s better that you rejected him. He’s of such a high— highest station. He wouldn’t have time for you, surely. You... have gotten used to your entirely and completely platonic, twice-a-month lunch dates and the occasional star chess lesson (where he never lets you win but you swear you'll give him a run for his money.) But it's fine. You can let go of those things, along with your feelings for the General.

It's better this way.

You think these thoughts somewhat confidently until you arrive at the Divination Commission and find a crowd swarming the central platform under the Matrix of Prescience Ultima. Frowning, you try to weave through the edge of it to your office, where you conveniently have a few nutrition shakes stashed away that you most certainly need. You’re already late and this hangover needs to go. You have a full docket for the day that you need to make fuller so you don’t think about—

You nearly stumble when you hear a rich, familiar, roll of laughter. You freeze, slowly turning to the sound. A crown of fluffy hair peaks above the small crowd, a red ribbon waving in the breeze.

Absolutely fucking not.

You duck, just in case, and try to creep below the crowd. You probably look ridiculous, but you absolutely cannot see Jing Yuan. You can’t. Your poorly-thought out, hungover plan of not caring about the General does somewhat heavily rely on not seeing the man. You trip over over your own feet and barely catch yourself so as to not tumble to the ground.

Jing Yuan calls your name and

You freeze before jolting to your full height a moment later. The gaggle of your coworkers part enough so that you’re able to see him— lit so well and handsomely in the morning sun, smiling so easily with... perhaps a hint of mischief in the curve of his lips.

He waves with his free hand, while a massive bouquet is pillowed in the crook of his arm.

The flowers are beautiful— off-ship exotics, clearly. The colors are all bright oranges and vibrant blues. Thinner stems are topped with bundles of white, delicate flowers that break the barrage of colors. They look fresh, like they’d been cut this morning. Fu Xuan stands next to him, clearly hungover herself and close to popping a blood vessel. It’s incredibly rare that the General do anything in the mornings, especially causing a commotion in the Divination Commission.

Jing Yuan, who is more than likely aware of this, looks entirely unbothered. Actually, he glows as he calls your name, gentle and rich, and the sound of it hits you in the chest, “There you are.”

"Here I am." You're not. You need that lobotomy. You nod to him curtly, "General. Is there something I can help you with today?"

Fu Xuan looks like she’s going to expire right there on the platform.

Jing Yuan cocks his head knowingly, “There is, yes. I have a rather personal matter to discuss in private with you. Are you available?”

You have things on your schedule. You can make yourself appear busy, if it means not dealing with the General you can’t really hide from and the beautiful bouquet in his arms. “Well—”

“They’re free.” Fu Xuan all but pushes you toward him. You regret covering her tab the night before. “Especially free, since I’ll be rescheduling our weekly meeting to tomorrow.”

“Is that really necessary—?” You laugh and wring your hands. You feel caught in the worst way. “General, will this personal discussion take much time? I am quite busy today—”

Jing Yuan, who has been watching your exchange with Fu Xuan wordlessly, looks a bit... crestfallen. It’s hard to tell on a man who holds himself like the General, but it’s there. A crease between his brows that’s slight, but visible and abnormal. Maybe he’s holding the bouquet a little tighter than he probably thought. There’s a sheen of sweat on his temple that, if asked, he would probably blame on the heat index for the day.

Your words die in your throat as you take him in and force yourself to meet his gaze. Honeyed and sad, a bit like a kicked dog.

“... I suppose, I could arrange a proper appointment with you. Perhaps it was uncouth of me to expect such accommodations to be made for me last minute. I apologize.” You can hear his tone change. It may be imperceptible to someone else, but you notice the shift in him. Gone is the playful lilt and air of mischief, on his a veneer of niceties that you... had forgotten he loses around you.

Something in your chest aches.

You open your mouth to speak, but nothing comes out. Floundering. Jing Yuan adjusts his hold on the bouquet—

“Enough of this.” Lady Fu shakes her head. She shoos a hand toward the lingering onlookers. “Back to work, now. Don’t eavesdrop either. I’ll know if you do.”

(Debatable, but it’s Fu Xuan’s favorite threat.)

Once the crowd has dispersed, she turns toward you too. You needed that lobotomy, like, yesterday.

“I will make the necessary changes to your schedule so you can speak privately for as long as you need." She points at you, then Jing Yuan. “Sort this.”

The General raises an eyebrow at her. She’s bold to speak in such a way to someone above her own station, but Lady Fu doesn't dare back down. She glares at him, then you, partially covering her mouth to block Jing Yuan’s view before mouthing, “FIX THIS!!!!”

...

On the way to your office, you walk side by side, in silence. You’re trying to think of the right words to say.

“... Are you sure you have time for this, General?” You ask him, softly. “I don’t mean to ask as a slight— just— I don’t want to inconvenience you is all.”

“Of course.” He replies easily. You turn down the long, quiet corridor that leads to your office. It’s tucked away in a corner of the divination Commission, facing outward toward the Arbor’s stump with tall windows providing a sunlit view. You’re glad you don’t have to look at him as you unlock the door with a thick-looking key. “This is a rather pertinent, time-sensitive matter we’re discussing. My own schedule is not consequential in this case. Haste, moreso.”

You laugh under your breath.

“Great Lan, Qingzu is going to kill me.” You sigh before pushing the door open with a shake of your head. Perhaps a smile curls on your lips. Who’s to say. “Did you at least not leave a pile of paperwork for her to delegate in your stead?”

“And what, diminish the time I have for my afternoon nap with busy work?” Jing Yuan laughs. The sound fills you from the bottom up and you want to choke on it. You tear your gaze away from him. “Such a thing would be unhealthy, you know. I’m an old man.”

“An old man who needs an ample amount of beauty sleep.” You tease him, it’s easy to. You speak before you even have a chance to think about the warm nature of your words. The meaning behind the bouquet in his arms that he still hasn’t given to you.

Why Jing Yuan is in your office at all.

“... If this is about my texts my last night—”

“It is, partially.” Jing Yuan hums. “I’m afraid I’ve slighted you, and it’s of the utmost importance I correct my transgression.”

“That’s— That’s not necessary, General.” Your cheeks burn.

“It is. Entirely, in fact. Stating my intentions with you over text messages was... a poor choice on my part. I must apologize appropriately, don’t you think?

“I mean— that’s—” Your words flounder in your mouth. “Kind of you.”

It is kind of him. He certainly doesn’t need to be here, in your cramped office, with a bouquet that costs close to what you make in a day of work. He doesn’t need to be showing a sincere, lovesick smile as he speaks. He’s showing you a card he’s kept close to his chest. One you, perhaps, guessed he had, but hadn’t intended to ever see.

He presents you with the bouquet, “You said you must be wooed, and I am here to begin that process explicitly.”

"... I said what?" You’re going to burst into flames.

“I thought you may not recall your exact words. Did you and Lady Fu have a fun night together?” Jing Yuan chuckles, and you flush so hot you feel almost faint. “You said that I must, and I quote, ‘woo you’.”

He smiles at you, the glint in his eye a bit more mischievous. More knowing. He’s toying with you.

“I— no— I’m so sorry, General.” You cover your face with your hands and back into your desk. “Forget I said that. Please forget I said anything.”

“Please, use my name.” He corrects, gently. “I’d prefer not to forget. You have a point, I should have stated my intentions clearly and to you in person.”

You peek at him between your fingers. He still holds the bouquet out to you, like he’s trying to lure a cagey cat in for a pet rather than make a confession. You feel out of sorts. Off kilter. That said— it is nice to hear him in person. Your heart has been oscillating between fluttering and pounding.

Jing Yuan tilts his head sweetly at you. You take the bouquet from him and examine it closer. There’s yellow and lilac pollen dusted on the filaments, fresh and fragrant.

“Jing Yuan, then.” You reply to him, softly. It’s hardly the first time you’ve called him by his name, rather than a title, but he preens when you speak regardless. “... So, you intend to woo me then?”

“Entirely.” Jing Yuan hums to himself, looking quite proud. “I do fully recant my offer I sent previously. Though I would be happy to lounge with you in the terraces and see some lovely views, I’ve secured a reservation for this evening at a lovely restaurant in the Exalting Sanctum, if you would accompany me.”

Your stomach flips pleasantly. You can’t help the little smile that’s twitching over your lips. You take care to not crush the bouquet in your arms, despite the urge to squeeze it to your chest, just to tamp down the thumping of your heart. Stroking your thumb over the silken petal of lush, round-petaled bloom, you let yourself smile.

You can practically hear Jing Yuan holding his breath. His eyes look hopeful and young.

“I accept,” you reply. “Consider me wooed.”

“It was that easy?” Jing Yuan’s voice takes that air of smugness that you know is a farce but you still can’t help but to approach him and bat your hands at his chest.

“I already like you, you know,” You laugh. “I was more offended that you wouldn’t face me and tell me your intentions. I hardly know the General to be a coward. I was a bit slighted.”

Jing Yuan catches your wrists in one of his hands and gently holds them against your sternum. His fingers lay over the thump of your heart; you wonder if he can feel it. You feel pleasantly woozy when you meet his eyes and all their intensity. Intention.

“I apologize.” He speaks smoothly, easily. Perhaps ducking his head down to be closer to your own. “It’s quite difficult to proposition someone so beautiful and kind.”

“Ah, so the General was hiding behind a screen, then?” You laugh over the heat rising in your cheeks. “I’ve never known you to be a coward.”

Jing Yuan hums, and you pop up on the corner of your desk. He’s close enough to feel the heat of him, and see the threading of his uniform and the glitter woven into the rich fabrics.

“Hm, I wouldn’t say it has anything to do with cowardice.” Jing Yuan shakes his head. His breath is warm over your cheeks. “I planned to tell you my intentions of courting you at the Terraces, once you accepted. I, perhaps, was too presumptuous in expecting you to assume beyond my initial ask. I should have been more clear.”

You stifle a laugh and flex your hands, still held in his firm, but kind grip.

“Jing Yuan, if you continue to speak to me so directly, I’ll demand you take me out now and not this evening.”

“Is that so?”

“Entirely.” You struggle to maintain eye contact and not let your gaze drift down to his lips. “I’m not used to you speaking so clearly, only your riddles.”

“What riddles?” He tilts his head, curly, a sweet smile on his face that is far too mischievous for who he is expected to be.

“Oh, you know—”

“Do I?” Jing Yuan asks. He steps between your thighs, the width of him forcing your legs wider. As if your flush could be any more intense. “You must tell me more over lunch. I’ll send a message to Lady Fu and clear your schedule?”

“... She did say to take as long as we need to sort this,” You soften, a bit intimated, if only for a moment. “Is this sorted?”

Jing Yuan hums, “You did say you were wooed. I’d consider that fairly sorted.”

“And you’ll have me?” You ask him, daring to slide your arms over his shoulders. The contact bubbles up months of tension over Star Chess boards (during games that, perhaps, were not entirely platonic).

“I’d be honored.” Jing Yuan’s voice sounds sweet, more quiet than you’ve heard before, like it’s just for you to hear.

There’s an edge to it all still— something raw and new that will need to be tempered. That is the nature of immortality and the relationships and partnerships that come with it. Complexes develop, heal, and grow differently within the self. You’ve already gamed out a few of Jing Yuan’s (a cursed Master who he will only reference in melancholy, unrequited love he was too young for, so many tragedies that he somehow manages to give himself for not preventing). He is perceptive. You’re sure he has put together some of yours as well.

For now, there’s a promise of good things. There’s the feel of him pressing his lips to yours, gentle but unyielding, strung with a mutual yearning that, in retrospect, would’ve been a shame to crush and hide away. There’s the warmth of him so close, and closer still when you drag him closer by the nape of his neck.

You can feel his grin against your lips, and you mirror it easily.

No riddles, only a fragrant bouquet and intention.

#lore writes #jing yuan x reader #jing yuan x you #jing yuan reader insert #hsr x reader #im very in love with him #he is so husband #feeling very soft and yearning about him lately AAAAH #enjoy :''^)

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genjv4rse · 1 year

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#사랑 enhypen as your bf !

warnings!...none just pure fluff and affection, lowercase intended.

notes : fun fact this was the first work i wanted to post but got distracted :)

genre : fluff, established relationships, slight angst

𝗛𝗘𝗘𝗦𝗘𝗨𝗡𝗚!

soft flirty bf huhu he's literally gonna flirt so hard and on top of that if you're shy he's absolutely gonna shapeshift your cheeks into a tomato/strawberry whatv red stuff you prefer :) i mean we all know hee is a pro at flirting so good luck to your sanity RIP

lots of singing fs this man's gonna sing for you like can't sleep? dw babe he's got a soty typa lullaby, bored/stressed? who needs a lofi playlist when you got lee hee :) hEAR me out he's definitely gonna write songs for you jsjsjs he's gonna sing em to you randomly cause It's romantic right?? he'll look deep into your eyes, throw that signature smirk of his and sing oh so lovingly cause he knows he's driving you nutz ;)

lotsss of movie gaming dates he'll beat you at every game heyyy he's an ace i don’t make the rules 🥱 but time to time he'll chill down and let you win few rounds intentionally but you don't need to know that

he loves to kiss you sm, your cheeks are his fav place to smooch uwu. but don't forget to smooch him back hehe.

his love is is a mix of quality time and words of affection !

𝗝𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗪𝗢𝗡!

omg he's gonna be so caring and protective towards you he's basically your second momma 😭

but don’t get fooled by his strong facade deep inside he's your lil kitty ready to be taken care of so plz do check on him and give him the affection he deserves

he gets seriously jealous whenever your paying too much attention on maeumi and she's reciprocating it with heavy affection. "cats are best" he would literally blurt out of nowhere and you can't help but laugh at his silly tantrum.

there will be times where won wouldn’t be feeling his best. all the stress, work and commotion tires him out sm yet he still feels like he's not the best. on those days he only seeks for your comfort. knowing very well all he needs is you beside him to make him feel better plz always love this boy he's gonna be a mess without you :(

his love is a mix of quality time and soft physical affection !

𝗝𝗔𝗬 !

rich sugar daddy bf but he actually acts like a dad lmao

if your eyes lingers on a item from more than 0.00001 seconds he'll buy it for you no matter what

he makes you lots of healthy homemade meals and does all the chores for you plz he's such a material man I want him 🛐

jay loves you alot and is always there to guide in every situation he'll be both mature and goofy cracking silly dad jokes to lighten up your mood girl you better appreciate this man and love him back 😾‼️

his love is a mix acts of service and words of affection !

𝗝𝗔𝗞𝗘!

so how does it feel to have a rizzmastser as your bf 😃? /j

he's so cute goofy and babygirl you wanna gatekeep him

he'll get excited over all sorts of lil things. will take you out on various fun dates like arcades, amusement parks, pet cafes but his most fav date place and activity is going out on a walk with you and layla in a nice, less crowded, green park uwu!

you’re basically layla's mom now. he'll let you play with her and take care of her in his absence (layla's so cute noo 😭)

another smooch lover but his fav place is the lips ;) his lips are basically glued to yours.

his love is a mix of quality time and physical affection !

𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗚𝗛𝗢𝗢𝗡 !

awkward ahh goofy bf 😃

he's gonna be so unserious in general but dw he gets pretty mature and serious when he needs to be :)

he'll be a bit awkward at initiating affection first so if you take matters in hand and initiate affection first he'll be over the moon ahaha.

once he's opened up to you he'll be quite a affectionate guy but he isn’t a pda lover so behind closed doors he's all lovey dovey ^^

he'll let you play with gaeul and then he's gonna be like "gaeul is so lucky to have visual parents aka me n you 😌💅" and you’re like 😀👍 lmao

ice rink dates uwu. he's gonna be your personal figure skating coach <3

his love language is definitely quality times !

𝗦𝗨𝗡𝗢𝗢 !

the slayest bf ever im jealous 🥺

king of affection boy's literally gonna bicker about who's the most affectionate one or who's more slay lol.

lots of tteobokkie dates and self care nights

yall will do sleep overs and do each others skincare. he's practically gonna turn into your special dermatologist 💅

but he can be very serious and understanding. whenever your having a hard time he'll be there in a flash of light he understands you better than anyone in this world and is always there to cheer you up <3

his love language is a mix of physical affection and quality time !

𝗡𝗜-𝗞𝗜 !

A 6'3" TEASE

but first he needs time to open up to you to get friendly enough to tease relentlessly

so when he gets all warmed up say bye bye to your life 😈 /j

he teases you and is very playful but dw he respects you alot too and is very understanding and serious when needed to be <3

lots of piggyback rides from him, he loves to cuddle you and play footsies lol.

he loves to lay on your lap cuz in that position he can admire your pretty face and relax too 😍

he'll call you in his late night solo practices to showoff but it'll turn into a goofy dance session and filled with laughs and affection he's so 😢

he'll take you out on arcade or bowling dates and would tease the he'll out of you if you suck :D

insists on playing video games with you but it ends up with him doing some stupid bets you always keep losing 🙄 but dw he'll let you win time to time intentionally ;)

he'll be such a sillygoofy fun boyfie plz I want him he's so cool and cute

he's love language will be a mix of quality time and physical affection !

taglist : @solarwoniii @shiningstar-byulxx @wtfhyuck

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wannaeatramyeon · 9 months

Text

Seong Taehoon x Reader: Happy Birthday! (feat Hansu)

G/N. Fluffy and a lil cracky. For @razypie informing us it's this dickhead's bday.

Taehoon blinks at the scene before him. This... this was not what he expected to come home to.

Sweat clinging to your skin and you in a skimpy top, giggling with his dad like you're both the best of friends, Hansu peering down at you fondly.

Standing a bit too close for comfort. Nudging him with your elbows like you're both in on a joke Taehoon is definitely not a part of.

You've made comments about his dad being a DILF before. About how good looking he is-

No. Fuck no. This is not that sort of scene. This is not his life.

"What the fuck is going on?"

Taehoon's voice alerts you to his presence, snapping you out of your conversation. You both turn to him with matching guilty expressions, the easy atmosphere from seconds ago completely gone.

"Son," Hansu sounds uncertain, "You're back early."

Back early?! What the hell is that supposed to mean? "Seriously. What the fuck-"

"Hold on, assho- Taehoon," You change your wording in the nick of time. It is his birthday after all.

Your boyfriend stares incredulously at you. Don't think he didn't catch on to your insult.

"Just..." you stride over to Taehoon, giving him a kiss on the cheek as a way of greeting (which he stubbornly does not lean down to make it any easier for you), pushing him out of the kitchen and towards the sofa. "We won't be long."

How dare you manhandle Taehoon. How dare you push him about in his own home

Fine. Fucking fine.

He plops down on the sofa. Scowl on his face and arms folded tight. Eyes glued to you and Hansu still visible through the doorway.

He sits and stares. Stares and sits. Five minutes pass. Then ten.

What sort of fucking birthday is this? Taehoon wonders if he's too old for a tantrum. But that's exactly what you and his dad deserve. You get him at his brattiest worst for ignoring him.

As Taehoon makes up his mind and about to leap over and give you two a piece of his mind-

You come out holding a wooden tray with dishes precariously balanced.

Fried eggs. Kimchi Stew. Fried Rice. Grilled Spam. Gukbap. All his favourites.

Oh. Right.

This would have taken ages.

This is what you two have been preparing. He's been too blinded by his annoyance to even notice the cooking.

Hansu follows shortly afterwards with a cake.

"Dad and I have been slaving in the kitchen for you, you ungrateful brat," you grin, no bite in your words and giving Taehoon's knee a fond squeeze.

(Both men twitch at you referring to Hansu as dad. No matter how many times, it still catches them both off guard.

And it's only thanks to a lifetime of training that Hansu doesn't drop the cake.)

"Happy Birthday!" you and Hansu say in unison.

Taehoon swallows down the lump in his throat. Anger he's used to. This- this he is not.

He holds back his words, the need to deflect and snap. Demand what the hell was up with the shitty greeting.

His nostrils absolutely do not burn, his eyes do not sting.

Doesn't dwell on the fact that his two favourite people (ack, cringe) get on so well.

And he will deny this to the end, his voice also doesn't crack when he mumbles,

"...Thanks."

410 notes · View notes

markresonates · 2 years

Text

FASTER

summary: you catch a ride to a party with Haechan after your date stands you up, but eventually ditch when drama ensues

pairing: rich stoner frat boy!Haechan x fem!reader

genre: porn w plot, angst, tiny fluff bc i'm soft

au/tropes: university, beach town, stupid bets, best friends to lovers

word count: +4.5k

a/n: oh hey tumblr! long time, no see...let's pretend i posted this last week, okay? okay

warnings: public high sex, oral (fem), squirting, tiny humiliation, lil manhandling, me *unsurprisingly* pushing the haechan big dick agenda, drinking & smoking, semi hard dom!Haechan, sub!reader

In your mind, you envisioned tonight going down a bit differently. You should be a few drinks into the first party of the school year at the biggest frat house on campus, body buzzing from cheap booze, drunk on your youth and the fallacy you’ll live forever. You were excited for the events that lie ahead, yet unbeknownst to you, what you imagined would never pan out. The guy who asked you out at club cornucopia last week was supposed to pick you up a half hour ago, and he’s failed to answer a single call of yours.

After reviewing your options, you decide to go to the party anyways. You’ll be damned before you waste your first opportunity of the year to party like your actions have no consequences. Collecting your things, you walk through the front door with determination.

A set of white headlights approach you from behind as you lock up the place, and the new silver Porsche they belong to cruises to a stop, parallel the driveway.

“Hey, babe,” a smooth voice calls out to you from the passenger seat window. “Looks like you need a ride.”

You tense up before peering through the vehicle and recognizing the driver – even in the dark you’d recognize Haechan’s smirk and that attempted wink he throws in any day. “Hm, depends. Are you going to drive the speed limit?”

“Ha, not a chance,” Haechan says, unlocking the doors, anticipating you’ll cave regardless. The handle on the outside pops out from where it was previously flat against the Porsche door.

You mull it over for a moment, then sigh and hop in the pricey sports car. “Well, at least you’re honest.”

As soon as he hears you buckle up safely, the car takes off at a not so safe speed. “So, y/n, why are you late to my party?”

“I could ask you the same question. Why are you late to your frat’s party?”

“I’m on-time, actually,” he reports, very matter-of-factly.

You snort. “This is what on-time looks like for you? You know, you’re good at a lot of things but time management is not one of them.”

Haechan chuckles, dryly. “This is what doing an alcohol run looks like, sweetheart.”

He pulls up to a stop sign, hitting the brakes suddenly and making you grab for the railing on the car door. From tall paper grocery bags in the backseat, you hear glass bottles bump against each other, clinking loudly.

“You ran out of alcohol that quickly?”

He cracks a cocky half grin. “What can I say? I throw great parties,” he compliments himself, changing gear shifts and hitting the gas pedal. “And thank you for acknowledging I’m great at nearly everything.”

You scoff and roll your eyes. “I mean like, that’s not what I said but-”

“I could show you a few other things I’m great at too…if you’re ever down, y/n,” he proposes and shoots a knowing glance your way.

Your cheeks heat up, his words compelling a fluttering sensation deep inside. It’s a familiar feeling when it comes to being within close proximity of Haechan. “Hey, eyes on the road,” you reply, directing his head forward with two fingers to his chin.

For as long as you can remember in your friendship, Haechan has been a shameless flirt. Nevertheless, after all these years of suggestive comments here and there, you’ve never taken them seriously. There was a point in high school where you had tried to distance yourself from him, at least until your tiny crush went away, but it was too hard to maintain radio silence with Haechan. Especially because he continued to bug you about hanging out and asking why you were avoiding “the bestest friend anyone could ever ask for" – his words, not yours.

The only reason you two stopped talking as much recently was that he got heavily involved with his fraternity business (and the wild shenanigans that accompanied it). It’s been a few weeks since you’ve spent more than 10 minutes with him.

“When did you get-” you begin before his abrupt parking.

“Here!” he announces. He kills the engine, getting out around the corner from Greek row. You disappointingly snap your tongue but follow his lead a second later. “Sorry, what was that again?”

“Haechan! Took you long enough!” Johnny shouts from across the street.

You take a deep breath. “Nevermind. It’s nothing.”

“No, what were you saying?”

“I was saying it took you long enough!” Johnny repeats, jokingly. “What’s up, y/n? Haven’t seen you here in a while.”

“Hey! Well, I’d be around more if I was invited to.” You give Haechan a pointed look.

“Why don’t you have her over more? Scared someone is gonna steal your girl?” The fraternity alumnus’ eyes ping pong between you two, attempting to gauge reactions.

He doesn’t give him much of an opportunity to read his face, instead ducking into the car again to retrieve hard liquor from the backseat. “Wait, aren’t you supposed to be DJing?” Haechan deflects.

“I left TY Track on duty right now. I was about ready to come looking for you because you volunteered to swing by the liquor store on your way here an hour ago.”

You scoff and cross your arms. “Oh, so you weren’t actually on-time to the party like you told me.”

"HA, Haechan? On-time?"

“Actually, um, I never said I was on-time to the party. I was perfectly on-time to pick you up where you were so you didn’t have to walk the entire way!” Haechan tries to clarify his vague assertion from earlier. He holds out two heavy bottles for you to take. "Here."

“I got those for you, y/n, don’t worry.” Johnny collects the two from your grasp. You grab the third from Haechan’s extended hand a moment later.

In total, your trio enters the rager through the backdoor with five bottles of the good stuff. You unload in the kitchen, where you find a tipsy Mark attending to a thoroughly shit-faced Jungwoo at their long rectangular table.

“y-y/n!” Mark hiccups. He gets to his feet, taking a few wobbly steps towards you to throw his arms around your shoulders . “I missed you!”

“Sorry, he’s clingy when he’s drunk,” Haechan apologizes for some reason.

You giggle at the cuddly boy’s inconsistent affectionate side. “Yeah, I can see that.”

“Mork, get off of her, she doesn’t want you.” He enunciates his words as if explaining something to a child.

“How do you know wha- I mean WHO, she wants, huh?” Johnny teases with a suspicious expression. He strolls out of the kitchen, returning to his shared turntables.

Annoyed, Haechan sticks his tongue into his cheek and his head twitches to the side. “Ugh. I need a drink.”

The kitchen isn’t terribly well-lit but it is bright enough that you notice a light purple patch on his neck. If you had to guess, based on the yellowish color around it, you would say someone’s mouth left that mark on him a week ago.

“Are you, like, jealous or something?” Mark blurts out. He squeezes your body tighter.

You avert your gaze from the hickey, blinking a handful of times. “I, um-”

“Why would I be jealous?” Haechan snaps. He hops on the kitchen counter, sitting relatively close to you, and screws the cap off of the vodka bottle you brought in. “Like I haven’t hugged my own best friend before? Come on.”

Bingo. There’s that reminder you needed: best F-R-I-E-N-D.

You can stare at his neck all you want but nothing is going to change the fact that your lips will never be in the same place.

“Is that all you’ve done? Hug?” Jaehyun interjects from behind you. He joins your small kitchen crowd, minorly buzzed with a red solo cup of beer in hand. Mark detaches his body from yours to cling to him and weirdly rub his ears instead.

“Yeah? So?” Haechan answers, begrudgingly.

“Hm, how do you guys feel about a friendly game of spin the bottle? Or is that too much for you to handle as friends?”

“If you wanna m-make out with y/n, you don’t neeeed to play a game,” Jungwoo mumbles, every syllable of his speech slurred to the point where you can barely understand him. “She’s p-probably easy enough to get on her knees r-ight now.”

The kitchen is dead silent as all eyes turn from the drunken individual to you. Haechan puts down the bottle before taking a single swig, jumping down from the counter a second later. Your heart begins to race as adrenaline floods your system.

“What did you just fucking say?” he challenges, venomously.

Jungwoo clears his throat nervously, perking up a bit hearing the distinctive threatening tone. “Er, I didn’t say that. S-someone…someone told me that.”

He lays his hands on the kitchen table, leaning halfway over it. “Who?”

“Oh my gawd,” Mark gasps dramatically. “The bet…”

“The bet?” Haechan whips in his direction. “Whose bet?”

You remember Haechan telling you that it’s a fraternity tradition for the members to carry out a bet the first week of school every year, and you have a feeling you know who Jungwoo is hinting towards – the particular someone who was supposed to pick you up earlier.

The guy who asked you out at club cornucopia, and hooked up with on your first date the day after that. He was so persistent to get you to third base, but you turned him down that night because you didn’t want to rush into things with a person you could genuinely see yourself growing to like.

You couldn't wait for Haechan forever. You knew you had to move on – or at least try to move on.

Mark gulps guiltily, before providing context. “His bet was that he couldn’t get someone he asked out at club cornucopia to, you know–” Mark bobs his head with his mouth open. “–on a first date…and an hour ago, he told everyone he did...with y/n.”

Your best friend clenches his jaw. “Who?”

“Sungchan.”

“Yeah?” he answers, right on cue. Sunchan stops in the doorway when he meets your livid eyes. “Oh.”

“Yeah, oh!” you spit. “So you really fucking lied and told everyone I sucked your dick? What the f-!”

Haechan cuts you off, socking their younger frat brother in the jaw.

You wouldn’t describe Haechan as the most athletic person in the world, but you heard from Jeno that he’s been hitting the gym more and more lately, evident by the fact he can do five full pull ups now. Much to the kitchen crowd’s surprise – yours included – his fist collides with Sungchan’s face hard enough to send him to the ground.

"Ow!" Haechan caresses his sore hand.

Having no desire to wait around and see what happens next, you grab his unharmed hand and drag him out the back door. You march him back to his car. Not a sound leaves your mouth until you are both in your seats.

“That was…” you trail off, cringing.

“y/n, I’m sorry that I-”

“No, no, it’s not you.” Receiving a call from Mark, he fishes his phone out of his pocket. He declines the call and patiently waits for you to continue speaking. “Ugh, I wish I could forget this whole night ever happened.” You bury your face in your hands for a moment.

“Hey, let’s go get high like old times,” Haechan suggests, nudging your arm softly after a moment of silence. “We can forget all about it, sweetheart.”

You give him a weak smile and hum approvingly. He smiles back at you. “There’s that smile of yours I love.”

He doesn’t stall for your input on location, inserting the key into the ignition, with a new – or should I say your old – destination in mind. It’s a 30 minute drive with no traffic but it doesn’t take long before you recognize the roads he is taking to the beach. You’re driving down memory lane, picturing the moments you shared with Haechan – you experiencing your first almost kiss with him in middle school; him sharing in great detail his first time with some hot girl you didn’t know personally but were envious of; you crying over your first heartbreak; him high blabbing all the secrets he knows about his frat brothers when he first joined and making you promise not to tell another soul.

This will just be another sour memory attributed to your favorite secret smoke sesh spot and remedied by his presence.

For once, he lets you pick the music. You keep the volume on low for him to share what he’s been up to most of the summer and you gladly listen. You’ve always been easily distracted by Haechan, and even if the party tonight was a monumental waste of your time, this moment is no exception to his captivating charm stealing your attention.

Haechan was the epitome of cool. Watching him drive, you’re convinced that he has never looked so hot. Every so often, he runs his fingers through his soft, dark magenta hair and you feel tempted to do the same. He leans back in his seat, his ripped black jean clad thighs spread wide open, right foot flooring the gas pedal. His hurt hand loosely grips the bottom of the steering wheel while the other is rested on the gear shift.

Your surroundings pass by in a blur since he speeds there nearly the entire way. You are in the middle of talking (and overanalyzing) your date with Sungchan when he pulls up to a stop light. He shifts the position of his hand to cup your thigh. It’s supposed to be comforting but, if anything, it feels more intimate and possessive than he initially intended.

He half expects you to pull away from his touch, but you wouldn’t dare move a muscle. Testing the waters, he slowly rubs his thumb back and forth on your warm thigh. It’s a delicate feeling that makes you feel like your skin is on fire. If it wasn’t for the traffic light turning green, he would have explored your body further.

He pulls into the small, empty dirt lot. Very few people know that behind a large boulder in the very corner of the lot, there is a large enough space to fit one car. He parks his Porsche but leaves it on to play music. You pick your favorite high playlist to play on warm nights like these. He retrieves the necessities from the trunk and readies things up so you don’t have to do any of the work. He takes the first hit from his ruby red bong, blowing clouds of white smoke into the air.

“You wanna be a big girl and light it yourself?” He playfully wiggles his eyebrows and waves the lighter around.

“I can do things by myself. You don’t always need to take care of me.”

“I don’t mind taking care of you, but okaaay, if you say so sweetheart,” he sing-songs.

Overestimating your abilities, you take a sharp hit and almost immediately cough. The stinging sensation prickles in your throat and lungs, while the euphoric haze punctures reality as you know it. You two go back and forth, taking turns until you’re both high as a kite.

You close your eyes and melt into the moment as Frank Ocean’s “Skyline To” flows from the car speakers.

Solstice ain't as far as it used to be,

It begins to blur, we get older.

Summer's not as long as it used to be,

Everyday counts like crazy.

Smoke, haze

The atmosphere is calming, a peaceful serenity in the silence. Rolling waves and soft melodies lull your mind into the clouds, though your despondent consciousness descends from the high quicker than you’re used to as the reality of the situation awakens an excitement only Haechan can invigorate. Where you lack vocal communication, the energy between you two buzzes and crackles as tension thickens in the humid air.

To diffuse some tension, you settle on asking about something you know he would love to brag about. “So, when’d you get this one?”

“What, the car? Last month. Isn’t she pretty?” he responds with a wide smile. He rubs the dashboard fondly. “I’ve always dreamed of having a Porsche.”

You giggle at his enthusiasm. “I guess dreams come true, huh?”

“Well…not all dreams. But maybe someday,” Haechan says, cryptically.

“I hope you get everything you could ever wish for.” You pat his knee with sincerity. “What else have you been doing since school started?”

He shrugs his shoulders. “Nothing really. I basically spend all my time with the boys and my baby.”

“Um, oh,” you reply.

He gets out of the car to put away his bong and its corresponding accessories in the trunk. While he’s taking care of business, you struggle to hide your emotions to the news of a relationship you weren’t aware existed.

Maybe it’s better to know you have no chance. Almost reassuring that you can give up on your dream where you could have a life with him. At least now you know where it is he got that hickey on his neck – from somebody luckier than you are, sadly.

He gets back in the car and takes over as DJ. You wipe the built up condensation off the foggy window with the back of your hand, failing to take into account that the droplets could soak into your long-sleeved, crop top shirt if you weren’t paying attention. You regret wearing it anyways due to the fact that tonight turned out to be much warmer than the weather app on your phone said it would be.

“Ugh, fuck. Just what I needed – a wet wrist,” you grumble.

Haechan rolls down your window for you, lightly snickering at your misfortune. You hold your arms out the window and try to squeeze water from the sweater material. “Oh, so you think this is funny? Now I’m going to be annoyed by it all night.”

“Hey, it’ll dry way sooner than you think.” He rubs your leg reassuringly.

You snap your tongue and sigh heavily. “Yeah, yeah, I guess.”

“You’re cute when you complain, y/n,” Haechan says out of the blue. “Pretty cute when you’re wet too.”

You’re facing away from him, staring out at the black water as if you didn’t hear him. Despite the booming waves crashing against the shore, he hears you gulp. You nearly choke on your saliva, which leaves the impression that when you’re high, your body can’t physically function if you’re simultaneously devoting all of your brain power to the meaning behind his provocative compliments. Then again, even if you weren’t high at the moment, you’re convinced something similar would happen regardless of sobriety.

Looking at the clock, you’re surprised by how much time has passed. Your high is a faint shadow of floaty lightheadedness by this point. You basically have no excuse to feel at a loss for words other than feeling naturally flustered by Haechan – your best friend with a girlfriend of his own now.

“Aren’t you going to say thank you, y/n?” he teases.

“Th-thank you."

“You’re wel-”

“I need some air.” Before he can react, you abruptly get out of the car.

He quickly joins your side and you flinch from how close he is. “Okay, what is it? Why are you being like this?” Haechan questions, reaching for your hand.

You pull away and cross your arms. “I just don’t think we should be so close if you have a girlfriend!”

His face scrunches up. “What the fuck are you talking about? I don’t have a girlfriend!”

“You just-? You just said you spend all your time with the boys and your baby.”

“God! Are you serious? Is that what this is about?” Haechan frustratingly runs his hand through his hair. “I was talking about my fucking car!”

“But-” You pause for a moment, processing his words. “But what about your hickey?”

He scoffs, rolling his eyes. “Jaemin and I had bets for the new school year where he had to give me a hickey and I had to wear it the whole first week of classes!”

"Jaemin?" Hiding your shocked expression, you look at the ground, too embarrassed to meet his eyes. Your plan works for 0.2 seconds before he lifts your chin up.

“Why did it matter so much to you?”

You gulp. “It didn’t.”

“Liar.” He moves his hand to cup your cheek. “Were you jealous, sweetheart?”

With both hands on his chest, you try to push away from him. He wraps his free arm around your body to hold you in place, causing you to gasp. Arousal instantly rushes through your lower half.

He directs your head back to stare into your soul again. “Answer the question, y/n,” he whispers with chilling intensity.

“I…maybe.” Your eyes flick down to his mouth where he wears a devilish smirk.

He shifts his hand again, this time holding under your chin but with his thumb lightly rubbing along your bottom lip. “Then I guess I have Jaemin to partially thank for making my other dream come true.”

Haechan doesn’t waste a single second diving in for a kiss. His unharmed hand slides down to squeeze your ass while the other loosely holds your lower back. You wrap your arms around his neck and deepen the kiss by parting your lips for his eager tongue to slip inside your mouth. He wobbles you towards the car, skillfully unbuttons and unzips your jeans, and flips your body around. From behind, he rips your jeans down your legs and gets on his knees, without a care in the world that his own will get dusty. He kisses your pussy over your panties and you mewl.

Noticing the wet patch, he chuckles. “Already wet for me, hm?”

“You've always made me wet,” you answer breathlessly.

He hums, content with your response. “That’s what I like to hear.”

He thumbs your panties to the side and connects his mouth to your folds. You lean against the car, moaning his name and inflating his ego. Haechan eats you out until you’re seconds away from coming. He rocks back on his feet and opens the car door. He pushes the button in the center console to open the hood, pushes both front seats forward and flips the back seats over to give you two more space. You kick your pants off your ankles as he gets in the back. He removes his throbbing erection from his jeans and gives it a few jerks.

“Fuck, y/n. You see what you do to me?” he rasps. You nod repeatedly, refusing to look away from his precum-slick tip.

He slides a condom on and you climb on top of him, straddling his lap. You hover over his large cock for a moment before he lowers your body down. Once his whole length has disappeared inside of your pussy, you're completely full to the point where you have tears in your eyes. He wipes a tear from your cheek and waits for you to roll your hips first. Soon enough, your bodies are molding together and you’re bouncing on his cock mindlessly.

You roll your head to the side to give his mouth access to your neck. He intermittently plants wet sensual kisses, taking years worth of pent up lust out on your sensitive skin. You can feel the satisfied smile on Haechan’s lips growing wider as you moan.

“I’ve been dying to hear your pretty moans for years now.”

“Yeah? Why didn’t you d-do something about it then?”

He scoffs. “God, what did you think I meant by ‘show you a few other things I’m good at,’ huh? Hasn’t it been fucking obvious I'm crazy about you?”

Haechan manhandles your body around so you’re facing away from him. No one would know he has a hurt hand by the way he digs his fingers into your skin. He fucks you nice and hard, turning you into a whimpering mess. You might as well be high based on the out of body experience after a handful of minutes.

“F-faster,” you whine.

“Alright, sweetheart. If you think you can take it…”

He increases his speed and loops a hand around your body to rub your clit. His fingers move rapidly, the pressure in your core increasingly mounting until the sensation teeters on the edge of overwhelming. You try to fight it and last longer than your body is realistically capable of.

Haechan senses your impending orgasm. “It’s okay, baby. Be a good girl and come for me. You know you want to.”

You come on his cock with a broken sob. As his pace accelerates, you regrettably start to squirt all over the back of his front seat. You watch your juices flow out of your body, squeezing your eyes shut, humiliated you can’t get a handle on your body’s reflexes to the pleasure.

“That’s it, y/n. Let it allll out, it’s okay. Don’t hold back,” he encourages you, surprisingly not caring about the mess you’re making in his precious car.

You roll your head to rest on his shoulder and drool drips from the corner of your mouth. Your body quivers through the entire high. When his fingers continue to rub your clit, you twitch wildly. Your hot walls pulse around his cock, finally triggering his own orgasm. Haechan shoots his load inside you while a rich, deep groan falls from his lips. The rhythm of his thrusting slows to a crawl before stopping entirely.

He lifts you off of his lap when both of you have finished panting and caught your breath. He rolls the condom off and puts it in a plastic bag he keeps in the back seat for collecting trash. Leaning forward, he presses the button to close the top of the car. It’s just you, him, and the sound of the ocean again.

He hands you the panties that were discarded in the front seat and you slip them back on. Haechan sits back, pulling your body close to his side. You throw your legs over his lap and snuggle into him comfortably.

“Dreams really do come true,” you mumble, lethargically.

"I guess so." He kisses the top of your head. "Or at least mine do."

You bury your face into his chest. “Sorry about your car.”

Haechan sighs. “It’s okay, really. I can always get it cleaned. And on the bright side, every time I get in my car, I’ll always remember how I made you come in the backseat.” He squeezes you tighter and you giggle at his optimism.

You're moments away from sleep when a lightbulb goes off in his head. "Hey, sweetheart, how about you give me a hickey on the other side of my neck?"

A bolt of excitement zaps you wide awake. You look up at him, eyeing a blank space with your name on it and smile. "I thought you'd never ask."

hiii ik 2 baddies is supposed to be about a 3some but how the fuck are 3 people supposed to fuck in a car?? exactly. i watched a video tour of the 2021 Porsche 911 (what i learned to be the newest model that actually has a trunk) for this and there's like barely any space for 2 people, let alone 3...

so it's been almost 6 months since i've posted and this is something i wrote real quick in honor of 2 baddies and to feed yall a bit. originally, i intended on posting this last week (when it was still the season of summer) but i was too anxious about my own school year starting this past week to proofread. 00 liner's watch me and mark's show off are still wips bc my thoughts are all over the place with both of them.

i feel like i've developed a love-hate relationship with writing over the last 10 months and it's hard to want to do it. i feel like it makes me happy while also making me anxious. the thing is, not posting also makes me anxious. same with anon mail. i love hearing from readers but i also know that before i closed my mailbox to anon mail, i started getting a lot of hate anons again, and it didn't really seem worth it. basically, it's a lose-lose situation in both regards. i'm going to turn on anons for a little and see how it goes...

i think most of my anxiety around tumblr now is that i know people expect things from me, and i want to do so well on those things that i don't do anything at all bc i don't want to let anyone down. i'm going to be more active on tumblr again but readers need to understand i'm a person. i have a life and i have too many feelings. i don't want to leave tumblr completely but if things get to be as bad as they were in the first few months of the year in terms of feedback, i might have to reevaluate my time here. i would greatly appreciate your patience with me posting those two fics and i thank you for reading this one!

okay, tis all! and again, i sincerely thank you for reading!

stream *2 Baddies!!*

➾my masterlist

985 notes · View notes

kakashiislut · 9 months

Text

No one asked for this, but I’ve been thinking about this and me and @kioplama had some giggly chats about it. So hehe, hope you enjoy.

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Part 2 here!

Warnings: Mentions of Simons past, concussions, scars, blood, malnutrition, needles, and more.

Authors Note: heyo! Maybe this will be a series, who knows!!!! Basically, Y/N is a underground nurse/doctor and she finds lil old Simon passed out in front of her house and she takes him in to care for him until he’s all happy and healthy.

Word Count: 1,096.

Part 1/?

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The Solider~ Ghost x FemNurse!Reader.

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“What the fuck is that” You mumbled, squinting your eyes to try and get a better look. Moving your curtain to the side, you stared at the massive black blob that laid almost 50 Ft away from your house. It wasn’t moving, but you could see the outline of a hand and maybe even a head.

Taking a step back, you reached into the entryway table and pulled out a Glock .19, pushing it into the back of your pants, you made your way out the front door.

You walked carefully to it.

It was indeed a body, a body that was unresponsive, but you could hear some mumbling. Using your nurse strength, you pulled the body onto its back and stared down at the odd mask and military clothing. “Sir, are you breathing?” You asked, trying to sound as professional as possible. “Sir! Can you hear my voice!” Leaning down, you could hear him say something.

“Roba? Is that your name? Sir, is your name Roba?”

Getting behind him, you hooked your arms underneath his armpits and began dragging him towards your back door.

—

“Oh My GAwd!” You let out a loud huff as the man’s body finally hit the hospital-like-bed you kept downstairs. “I never regretted having an entire hospital downstairs more than right now- ow! My back-“ You whined out, rubbing the sore spot on your lower back. Getting him downstairs….well…if he knew, it would probably break his pride.

If he had any left.

You got “scrubbed in” as fast as you could. Slipping on a pair of scrubs over your clothes, getting into some gloves and even putting a mask to your face.

You had everything. Of course you did, you’re a pretty famous underground nurse. You worked with petty criminals, politicians that needed embarrassing or private work done, even with poor people who couldn’t afford basic help. Though licensed as a nurse, your knowledge and expertise went as far as a doctor.

You took off the mask first.

“Wow…you’re..something” you mumbled, placing it to the side, your fingers searching for a wet wipe to clean his face a bit. Once clean, you checked for any sort of cuts or wounds.

The man had a crooked and bumpy nose, with a massive scar coming across of it. His eyebrows were brown and messy, with once again, another scar vertically cutting through it. His hair was dyed blonde and grown out, some of it covering his face. He had a Glasgow smile cutting up the right side of his face and his cheeks were sunken in.

Very obvious sign of malnourishment.

Peeling open his eye lids, you flashed a light and watched how they simply didn’t respond. His pupils seemed to be uneven and you heard the smallest groan slip out of his mouth.

Concussion? Seriously. Fuck.

“Roba? Can you hear me?” The man licked over his dry and cracked lips. “No.” He mumbled, “no? No What?”

The man went silent again.

—

It was bad. It really was. When you cut off the man’s shirt, his body was littered with unimaginable scars and wounds. His shoulders were burnt and messy. He had a hole between his ribs. What seemed like 100 gunshot and stab wounds. His body was also littered with many messy and faint tattoos. The most prominent and taken care of was the one that adorned his forearm.

Lucky for you, those were all scars and seemed to be in the man’s past. The bloody ones…weren’t any better. His skin almost seemed to be peeling, he had a branding on his pelvic bone that stuck out, and shards of glass and wood stuck into him.

His ribs were sunken in and his skin seemed to be almost purple and red. The man needed something in his system, STAT!

Infection. Infection. Infection Was all that ran through your mind as you hurried to grab a IV bag full of fluids. You searched his cubital fossa for a vein and when you got a good one; you injected him with the needle. Letting the bag drip its liquid gold into his system, you cut off his pants.

Not as bad. But his legs were skinny and taunt.

His wrist was also broken. It seemed cleanly broken though. Like someone purposely did it to inflict pain.

You’re not worried that he might be a horrible person, you really aren’t. You’ve worked with people in the mafia and so much worse. If this man deserved all this to happen to him…then who gives a shit!

—

“Finished!” You huffed, sitting down in your chair and breathing heavily. Working with a limp body was super difficult, you barely had control over it. You used over the counter Antibiotics for his infection and a “homemade” cast for his wrist.

To heal? He needs lots and lots of nourishment.

Sliding your wheely chair to the closet, you opened it up and searched for a pair of handcuffs. To be safe. Of course. You wheeled back and attached his good hand to the railing of the bed and a sense of comfortability washed over you.

The painkillers you injected into the IV bag will keep him asleep, make him a little drowsy, so he’ll for sure wake up screaming and thrashing, confused where he ended up at. While he had his beauty sleep, you searched his pants, vest, side bags and the broken down backpack he had on him. Messy and dirty clothes made up most of the bag and you made a mental note to wash them in your softest and best detergent.

He had a bag of essentials in the smaller pocket of the military backpack and you took them to the bathroom in the basement. He had no phone, just a loose watch that had a broken screen. His vest seemed to be missing something, like some sort of system was ripped out of it.

The man had no ID.

The man seemed to be no one. Like he didn’t exist.

Cleaning up the mess you made, you didn’t need to worry about weapons as the man had nothing on him. Maybe, he himself was the weapon. You left upstairs, locking the door on the bottom of the stairs, and then the door that led to the stairs. You washed his messy clothes and stitched up the ones that had tiny holes in them. You made a homemade tomato soup and kept it warm until he would wake up.

Before you left upstairs, you snapped a photo of his face. Your “friends” could help you.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Heyo! Sorry for making this kinda short and maybe a bit fast paced, but I’m to excited thinking about their little interactions they’re gonna have in the next part! I hope you like it and leave some comments for any misspellings or ideas! My request box is also open ❤️

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taintedtort · 1 year

Note

Hi love

I stumbled upon ur blog and ahh love ur writting i wad thinking maybe if ur requests are open that u could write a lil smth IF UR FREE OFCI

was thinking scaramouche x reader argument (angst to fluff :the ansgt shouldnt be brutal bc i dont hsndle it well)

Or if ur not comfy writting that u could doo

Scaramouche x reader scara accidentally confesses to reader??

Dont overwork urself and remember to eat <3

prompt ✧ confess

character ✧ scaramouche

warnings ✧ gn!reader, a SLIGHT argument in the beginning, but none!

a/n ✧ ahh hi!! i decided to combine both prompts a bit?? so enjoy and thank you for the request !

you heard your office door slam, causing you to whip your head around. you were met with an annoyed scaramouche pacing right towards you. a small sigh left your lips, what was he mad about this time? scaramouche often came to rant to you about whatever incompetent subordinate pissed him off, so you simply took a seat and waited for him to start talking.

“can you believe how pathetic some people are? not being able to follow simple instructions.” he dramatically plopped down in the seat next to you with a grunt. you stayed quiet and eyed him, waiting for him to continue. he didn’t, much to your surprise, and just glared right back at you.

“at least you’re slightly less idiotic than the rest,” he mumbled, mostly to himself, but you heard him anyway. your brows furrowed, “slightly?” you questioned. he looked at you expectedly, “yes, slightly,” came his reply.

“is that supposed to be a compliment?” you argued, a slight edge in your voice. he looked taken aback at your response before his lips came up in a scowl. he opened his mouth to deny— or confirm— you couldn’t tell. and apparently neither could he, because he closed his mouth back with a look of doubt in his eyes. “archons, scaramouche.” you sighed, looking back at the work you needed to finish soon— that was assigned by him.

“hey! i’m not done talking yet,” he snapped, putting his elbow up on your desk to fully turn towards you. “well i’m done listening, go away.” these types of random arguments were normal between the two of you, thanks to scaramouche’s smart mouth.

“it’s part of your job to listen to me,” he retorted, causing you to roll your eyes. “no it’s my job to get this paperwork done… for you.” this caused him to scoff and cross his arms. “i don’t need you to get it done, i’ll make someone else do it.”

“then what am i even getting paid for?” you couldn’t help but crack a small smile at his childishness, finally leaning away from your desk and looking him in the eye. “to talk to me.” he reasoned, staring you right back in the eyes with full seriousness. “why is that my job?” you teased, wanting to annoy him further.

“because i like—“ you watched as he clamped his mouth shut and his eyes widen a fraction. your eyebrows instantly raised in curiosity and you sat up straight in your seat. “like what? like talking to me?” you pressed, trying to get him to finish his statement.

he was quiet for a moment, clearly racking through his brain for an excuse. after a few beats, he averted your gaze, “you’re tolerable,” he stated. his reply made you smile. you could read in between the lines, but you wanted him to say it to your face.

“is that how you really feel?” you quipped. a curt nod came from him, and he still wouldn’t look at you. his heart was racing but he would not allow a blush rise to his cheeks. he knew what you were doing, he knew you knew, but he refused to stoop so low as to confess, right now.

“just drop it, you’re ruining my bad mood,” he argued. you quietly stared at him, waiting for him to finally look at you. once he heard your silence, he gathered enough courage to steal a glance.

when he saw you staring with such a soft look in your eyes, he couldn’t help the loving feelings that engulfed him. he had to bite his bottom lip from spilling his guts right there and then. your lips opened at the silent declaration of love he just poured out to you in a single look.

“it’s okay, scaramouche, you don’t have to say it. i love you too.”

#reader insert #genshin fanfic #genshin x reader #x reader #fanfic #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #genshin impact fatui #gn reader #gender netural #genshin smut #genshin impact scaramouche #scara x reader #taintedtort #tortasks #tortrequests

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nishipostitz · 9 months

Text

how jujutsu kaisen men get their first kiss

tw! geto x gojo, fluff, crack, kissing?¿ 😭 choso’s brothers mentioned. not taken seriously. not really an x reader or x anyone

starring!!! gojo, yuuji, megumi, and choso

gojo

it was in his second year of high school, there was this pretty annoying fan girl following gojo all around and begging him to date her. one day gojo was fed up and whisked up a plan to get rid of the fan girl for good. “i swear gojo i do not want to be doing this. youre stinky, too!” but gojo was not gonna let up. so he offered geto something ans he agreed to the plan. the plan was; have geto let down his hair and just sit nice on the bench. gojo would write a note and tell the fan girl to meet him under the cherry blossoms. so when the girl arrived, she would see gojo and geto kissing and get the hint “oh this man is taken”. but to geto’s dismay, the bench’s legs were a little unleveled so when gojo say down, geto slid down the bench and they actually kissed. lets say they both cried after that. but geto cried harder 😭

yuuji

he was only in elementary and he was just playing on the playground with his buddies. and suddenly, this really nice girl in his class came up to him and started hanging out with him. yuuji’s really nice so he let her play with him and his buds. when recess was over, they went to their desks to start working on classwork again. the girl gave him a lil peck on the lips and ran away. yuuji was so surprised what had happened and started crying because A) it was his first kiss and B) he didn’t know her that well and he wanted to save his first kiss to someone he actually cared for. so yuuji was a sobbing mess for the rest of class until megumi knocked him out with a textbook saying “i gave him a real reason to cry” he loves him.

megumi

he would rather admit his first kiss was with his demon dogs than admit he never kissed a real human before. poor baby 😔

choso

choso was keeping me entertained with his idea. so basically, he gave away his first kiss to a curse because it threatened him “kiss me now or your younger brothers get it” and without a second thought he kissed the curse. the curse didn’t even want a kiss. it only wanted to eliminate his brothers, but who knew he loved his brothers so much 🤷‍♀️ i love choso jail me

hopefully the gojo one was funny bc i got the idea before my nap and .. hehe

#fanfiction #fluff #jjk gojo #jjk fanfic #gojo satoru #gojo x reader #megumi fushiguro #jjk megumi #jujutsu kaisen yuuji #itadori yuuji #jujutsu kaisen choso #choso kamo #jjk choso #jujutsu kaisen #jjk season 2 #jjk x reader #animecore #anime boy

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hamsterclaw · 1 year

Text

Pow

Your job is to keep Gotham city safe, but you spend more of your time keeping Catboy aka Jeon Jungkook out of trouble.

Pairing: Jungkook x F! Reader

Rating: 18+

Word count: 1.1k

Genre: Subversion of Batman roles, smut, crack and misandry

Warnings: Sex, pouty JK

For Memes @madbutgloriouspond who took this idea and ran with it and came up with all the best lines including ‘being taken seriously as a man.’ Special mention to Mango @blog-name-idk for encouraging the crack all the way.

Gotham is cast in perpetual twilight to you because of your burden of being her protector.

The villains who seek their own gains stop for no man, even if they look hella sexy in a catsuit.

Jeon Jungkook aka Catboy because Catman didn’t have quite the same naughty ring to it, crosses his arms over his chest and expects you not to be distracted as he talks to you.

You remind yourself to tell him he needs to talk less pouty if he wants anyone to actually listen, but for now you just enjoy the view.

‘They didn’t even stop when I stood in front of them,’ he complains.

You tear your gaze away from his sculpted ass as he slinks around the bat cave and try to concentrate on his words.

‘Did you tell them to stop?’ you ask, undoing your weapon belt and letting it fall to the floor for your trusty manservant Park Jimin to pick up later.

‘I told them!’ Jungkook whines, voice going pitchy like it does when he’s at his most agitated. ‘I threatened them with my claws!’

‘Oh Kookie,’ you sigh. ‘You need to work on your presence, baby girl.’

You unhook your cape and toss it aside carelessly.

‘Will you give me a back rub, kitty?’

‘Don’t call me kitty!’ whinges Jungkook.

‘Ok ok, don’t get testerical,’ you say hastily, resisting the urge to roll your eyes. God, he gets so tetchy sometimes.

Like it’s a problem being so pretty he gets constantly objectified.

Man problems mystify you.

You start peeling off your leather batsuit.

‘Maybe if you want to be taken seriously as a man you should stop stealing jewellery,’ you suggest.

Jungkook goes all red in the face with how worked up he is. You can tell by how he takes a deep breath before he starts speaking that he’s about to go on another one of his meninist tirades.

God, if he wasn’t so pretty you’d break up with him and date Poison Ivy. Now Kim Taehyung’s a man who leans into his menininity.

You need to head this off at the pass before he gets truly worked up and refuses to sleep with you.

‘JK,’ you say, voice low, velvety. ‘C’mere baby.’

He stops talking but doesn’t move, looking at you like he’s considering saying no.

‘You know I respect you as a man, don’t you?’

Jungkook stares at you, wide-eyed, and you know you nearly have him.

‘You’re the strongest man I know, much stronger than me.’

The corner of his pretty mouth curls up slightly.

‘Come and let me sit on your lap, baby,’ you coo.

When he reaches the rather conveniently located lounger you’re womanspreading across, he’s already hard.

You remind yourself to send Hobi a lil something to thank him for the incredible job he did designing Catboy’s fitted latex number.

You ask, ‘can I touch you, baby?’

Jungkook nods, pouts a little.

Men love it when you respect them.

You slip out of the batsuit, enjoying the way his eyes roam over your body wildly, like he can’t decide where he wants to look most.

‘Can you take your suit off for me, doll?’ you ask.

He unzips slowly, tugging the suit down to reveal sculpted shoulders, defined pecs with dusky nipples.

You kiss his chest, tongue flicking over his nipples. He lets out a low moan as you roll one nipple between your fingers whilst sucking the other. His cock twitches under its latex prison.

You help him out of the rest of his suit, until he’s bare, standing in front of you fully erect.

You wrap your hand around his cock and tug him gently down.

He groans as you sit in his lap.

You’re already wet, have been since he folded his arms earlier, creating a cleavage displayed to perfection by the low neckline of his suit.

Another Hobi genius design.

Jungkook moans prettily as you move up and down on his cock. His forehead is sweaty, his hair sticking to it in pretty curls.

He looks wrecked, and you’ve barely started fucking him.

‘I’ve barely touched you,’ you taunt, a little breathless yourself from how rigid and thick his cock feels inside you.

He says nothing, reduced to whimpering and moaning as he helps you move your hips.

You press your fingers against his parted lips, into the wet warmth of his mouth.

‘Suck, baby.’

‘Gonna cum,’ he mumbles around your fingers.

‘Already? You’re such a slut for me, we’ve barely started, baby boy,’ you pant.

Jungkook cries out as he comes, spurting hot streaks of white into your cunt. His pretty moans rise in pitch until he’s so loud you’re glad the batcave is soundproof.

He buries his face between your breasts as his cries subside.

‘Come on,’ you say, pinching his nipple. ‘One more for me, baby.’

Jungkook twitches helplessly inside you, still hard.

‘I can’t!’ he protests.

‘You can,’ you say, reaching between his spread legs to press a finger against his rim.

Jungkook cries out in pleasure as you nudge a knuckle against his rim.

You squeeze his cock, which is already hardening inside you, and Jungkook whines.

‘Gotta,’ he grunts.

He doesn’t finish his sentence, instead rolling on top of you so he can start hammering into you.

His stamina is ridiculous.

You’ve always appreciated how he keeps himself in good shape for you, his figure is as manly as the day you met him trying ineffectually to rob a bank using his manly wiles.

You’d paid the bank manager and the chief of police off to not pursue him.

Robbing banks is really a woman’s job. Men lack the finesse to do it properly.

Jungkook’s breathy moaning snaps you back into the present.

‘Are you close?’ you demand, fingers under his chin.

‘Yes,’ he cries out. ‘Fuck, yes.’

You hold out until you feel him pulsing inside you, his hands tight on your ass.

‘Good boy,’ you say, breathless, ‘that’s good, baby.’

Jungkook presses kisses to your neck as he helps you grind on him, seeking your own pleasure now.

You moan as he bucks his hips, and then you’re coming, wetness seeping from you to coat his cock.

He wraps his arms around you, and you bury your face in his soft hair.

‘Wanna snuggle,’ he says, muffled into your chest.

You sigh.

Men get so clingy after sex sometimes when all you want to do is tap that ass.

He pouts up at you, and your heart softens.

‘Ok, catboy, we can snuggle,’ you say, resigned.

Hopefully he doesn't want to stay the night too.

©hamsterclaw 2023

This is for Memes @madbutgloriouspond who encouraged this crackiness and came up with all the best lines including my favourite line about 'being taken seriously as a man'. Special mention to Mango @blog-name-idk equally for running and encouraging this chaos.

#jungkook fic #jungkook smut #jungkook x reader #bts imagine #bts smut

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gaybananabread · 3 months

Note

Can we get headcanons for Hawks and Dabi? Is Dabi even ticklish, as a burnt piece of bacon?

🪶🧡Hawks & Dabi Tkl Headcanons🩵🔥

~And I’m back! Sorry for taking so long to get to my inbox, I live in shame (╥ᆺ╥；). I also got a req for some LOV hcs, so those should be out soon! These two doofs will forever hold a special place in my brain and I love it. Thank you for requesting!~

🩵Dabi🔥

General:

So the crispy-fried parts of him are ticklish, but to a degree. (continued in Lee)

He gives heavy ler-leaning switch vibes. Like, he’s always ready to wreck a bitch, but he’ll occasionally want some goofy affection.

Is incredibly embarrassed to admit he likes tickling. Will deny it until his last breath unless he’s “forced” to admit it.

Lee:

Only light tickling works on the scarred areas, maybe feathers or gentle tracing with nails

Even then, scarred bits only get him giggling softly.

It’s adorable and soft, which is exactly why he’ll kill almost anyone that tries.

He’s gotta be in the perfect mood, or so down-in-the-dumps that he doesn’t give a shit about what anyone does.

Main lers are Hawks, Twice and Toga. If anyone else does it, they’d better be wearing some wool and modacrylic suits.

Rough, airy giggles ranging to full-out cackling, depending on where and how you get him.

His worst spots are his belly button and armpits. If you go to town there, he’ll forget his name in no-time.

Melt spot is the area from under his chin and down to his collarbones.

That whole area is burned, but some gentle affection makes him happier than he’ll ever tell. Especially some tickly kisses to let him know they don’t care that he’s a lil’ crispy around the edges.

Ler:

Good luck and condolences to your diaphram-

He’s got a rough style, preferring to get his lee screeching over mere giggles. (if he cares, though, he’ll do what they prefer)

He’s not picky: he’ll wreck whoever in the main LOV-circle.

Most frequent flyers are Hawks and Twice (see the parallel?). He likes excuses, mainly giving out revenge tickles.

The teasiest bastard to ever walk the Earth. Like, seriously, man has no shame.

“That tickles? Better brace yourself, giggles: it only gets worse from here~” “Huh? Sorry, didn’t hear that over you laughing your ass off.” “Tickle tickle tickle, cutie~”

Would 100% do the Tickle Monster routine, but be genuinely terrifying about it. Long chases, anticipation builders, and raspberries/nibbles when he’s “hungry”

He’ll stop if the lee seriously asks, but other than that, goes until they’re wheezing.

Surprisingly nice aftercare: back rubs, light praise and occasionally cuddles if you’re good with puppy-dog eyes.

🧡Hawks🪶

General:

First off, this man has no shame in admitting he enjoys tickling.

He has “can say the t-word at any time” powers and abuses them whenever possible.

Birdy boy gives straight switch vibes. Down for a tickle fight, no matter what direction it goes for him.

Lee:

A lot more ticklish than most would think. Few actually try it, but those that have are pleasantly surprised.

He gets lee moods frequently, though they’re rarely taken care of. While he can admit he doesn’t mind tickling in general, asking to receive it is a lot harder.

When he is tickled, his laughter is bright and pitchy. That confident voice tends to crack when he’s laughing his feathers off.

Worst spot is his wings for sure, followed by his hips. If you dig into his wingpits, he’s a goner.

Melt spot is his stomach. He loves gentle belly traces, though he can’t handle kisses or nibbles there for too long.

His favorite ler is Dabi. He’s closest with him in the league, and the man knows how to get him laughing.

If the lee mood is really bad, he’ll sit near Dabi with his arms behind his head until he gets the message. If that doesn't work, it's annoying the hell out of the crispy boy.

Ler:

*Ehem*...the wings.

You know he uses those whenever possible to mess with friends and associates.

A stray feather hear, an accidental bring-brush there. Everyone knows he's doing it on purpose, but few actually try to prove it. After he finds out, even fewer succeed.

Purrs smug, teasy little compliments to his lee. Mans is cruel in the best way.

“Those seem like some adorable giggles. Mind sharing?” “What? You don't want me seeing this cute, squishy tummy? I don't see the problem, giggles~” “Loving these thighs of yours. So fun to squeeze and poke— the snorts are the best part!”

He “attacks” Dabi the most, mainly for mood-checks or just to be an ass.

After him, Twice is a regular. Whether it be for comfort after a “splitting” headache or just because, a few feathers will find their way to the villain.

Hawks doesn't really have a particular style besides “loveable asshole”

Depending on who's getting it, he'll go soft, rough, in the middle, feathers only: whatever the situation calls for.

Mainly cuddly aftercare: hugs, back rubs, a few spare teases, and maybe a snack if you're really drained. Wants to make sure his lee had fun over anything else.

#mha tickle #lee!hawks #ler!hawks #lee!dabi #ler!dabi #sfw tickling community #tickle #sfw tickle headcanons #switch!hawks #switch!dabi #ticklish!hawks #ticklish!dabi #tickle headcanons #my hero academia tickle #bnha tickle #ticklish!keigo #ticklish!touya

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pinkisacreativecolour · 12 days

Text

Okay okay okay. This post is going to be mentioning so much murder and death and also a lil bit of existential horror and just plain old horror but yk. With the concept I’m about to speak into this world it’s bound to happen. It’s also crack taken seriously. So. High school au.

Tha basic facts:

Chuuya lives with Verlaine

The Flags and Chuuya are friends and have been for a year

Dazai got taken from Mori’s care when the old boss died so he’s in a foster home with atsushi rn. They live with the Izumi’s.

Oda’s with Fukuzawa. Ranpo and Yasano too.

The Ada are a detective group outside of school. It’s literally just made of high schoolers and middle schoolers. They are the best in Yokohama. The people think the police are a joke.

. The flags are a youth club that Pianoman managed to establish with the old principle. They do basically whatever they want with the promise of doing shit for the school when they graduate. The old fuck dies (murdered by Mori), and when said worlds worst high-school doctor takes over, he tries to disband the club after they couldn’t get Chuuya to start living on campus. Verlaine said no. Mori wants to make Verlaine , + Chuuya when he graduates, work for him.

The flags aren’t really sure what to do and Chuuya can’t move onto campus without permission and so. They decide to try and summon the spirit of the old principle to get him to tell Mori to leave them alone without him realising it was them. Chuuya says it’s a stupid idea. Albatross says it’ll be fine. What’s the worst that can happen?

Instead they manage to summon the ancient horror Arahabaki.

A lotttttt of psychedelic shit happens. Arahabaki wants at least one soul in exchange for the other’s freedom. Chuuya sacrifices himself and the rest of the flags are left reeling. Albatross yells at the Ancient horror god that there has to be something they can do to get their friend back.

Arahabaki says it wants 100 souls in exchange for Chuuya’s. In thirty days. The flags have to kill them all before delivering the bodies to Arahabaki as proof.

… what the fuck.

Arahabaki: this town is too peaceful. I want chaos. And souls. And blood.

So now. A group of 17-19 year olds have to try and kill 100 people in 30 days without getting caught. With an ancient horror haunting them with their currently dead friend’s body and voice. One of them has to tell Verlaine. And Adam. No one wants to tell Dazai. Exams are in exactly 36 days.

I call it How to Kill 100 people in 30 days. The title font looks like a romcom

#cjs rambling #bsd #bsd the flags #bsd flags #bsd chuuya #bsd verlaine #bsd dazai #murder mention tw #death mention #how to kill 100 people in 30 days #long post

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onlyseokmins · 1 year

Text

too many holes to choose from • hhu

Pairing: hip hop unit x afab!reader

Genres: smut (minors dni!), fivesome w/ hhu, CRACK/HUMOR ABSOLUTE CLOWNERY don't take me or this seriously at all

Warnings: unhealthy coping mechanisms in order to take four dicks in the most impossible way = best crack content out there ❤️ kinda gross and weird if taken too seriously (don't be like mingyu)

WC: bulleted list 🤷🏻‍♀️

A/N: this is what happens when hhu are being whores onstage + @duhnova (credit to their silly sexci brain) and I are up way past our bed times... Might be expanded on seriously in the future 😅

CONCEPT: You've got four dicks for the taking and offer up your seven holes to accommodate them 🫡🫦

Mingyu:

"There's... more?"

Poor baby is baffled when you ask which of your seven holes he would prefer

Only really learned about the main three just a few weeks ago

He's so confused and unsure about what other four you're referring to

Eyes blown wide, mouth hanging open when you attempt to explain

But you decide he's a lil too dumb (affectionate) to follow

WILL take you too seriously

He's also too big for your other tiny, special holes

He can use and choose from the regular ones however he likes

Oh and he does

Proving what he learned about the three main holes very well in the end

Vernon:

Does his little eyebrow wiggle and pouty lips — you know what I'm talking about — when you say you'll take him up your nose

"You'll what?" Are... you sure?"

Listen

You're going to snort this man

You're going to make it happen

Because that's just how things should be

And he's like how and why

Will be very doubtful, concerned, amused, and somehow turned on by your absolute weirdness and tenacity

Of course, that doesn't work out but there is a hole somewhere close enough that you can accommodate him in

So your nose is somewhere involved in there but not in the dick-taking way and that's a win for all of you really

Seungcheol:

"I've got two ear holes," you inform him.

"So do I, sweetie. You're not special."

“No, you don’t get it, sweetie, 'cause you’re not hearing me obviously... I want you to stick your dick in them.”

That shuts him up real quick

He obviously doesn't think this will work

But he can't help but be curious wtf happens if he sticks his dick in one ear does it come out the other???

Listen, brain worms but like dick worms

Anyways, y'all gonna end up having a deep conversation about how this could all work while he's balls-deep inside of you so it's a win-win

Love a man with a sexci, thought-provoking brain (derogatory)

Wonwoo:

The only normal one

And by normal I mean he isn't having any of your shit

Not in his Christian Minecraft server

*pushes his glasses up anime-style*

"NOW LISTEN HERE YOU

HEATHENS — "

He's going to fix y'all make you worse

WILL educate everyone on the proper holes to fill

Various positions, many times...

Takes education very seriously

Might even find some online pdf / article for mingyu to study and you to write an essay on later

He will consider asking cheol to demonstrate along with him because he trusts the older just enough despite the morbid brain conversation

Simply pretends he does not have two ear holes to hear

Honestly though by the time he's done with you you're going to be wishing you had those four extra holes because he's a beast *sweats*

Anyways y'all have normal fivesome fun sexci time and it's even more enjoyable after having some good humored clownery beforehand 🙏🏻

#ez.creates #svt smut #seventeen smut #kpop smut #hhu smut #smut headcanons #hip hop unit smut #lmao this is just some fun for kicks and giggles jakdfjkdfj feel good crack 🤌🏻#svt.smut

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ivorygreens · 22 days

Text

a lil klance cute meet

1.4 k

university au crack taken seriously

academic probation Lance and scholar graduate Keith

#klance #voltron #voltron legendary defender #keith kogane #lance mcclain

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feralsteddie · 1 year

Note

So i need to hear about you Steve & Argyle friendship thoughts because I keep seeing them in your tags and I think they’re such an underrated duo that would probably get along so well together?????

ohmygod THANK YOU I’ve been waiting for an excuse to go off about them. Fics always leave out Argyle or have Steve just think he’s Jonathan’s weird friend and like, I get it, but we could do so much better guys

Like okay I have a couple of different ideas for them. One is nearly canon compliant (aka Hawkins still splits open so we still gotta wait on a boss fight, but Eddie lives, bc I said so) and the other is au where Vecna bites it, Eddie just got a lil nibbled, the charges got dropped, and everything is in the realm of fine. Gunna talk about the first one. This is definitely a bit of a mess of rambles. Enjoy.

It takes a while for them to actually have their first conversation, given everything.

Argyle is with Jon most of the time, who’s with his siblings in the cabin they’re fixing up, all hyperfocused on the impending return of Vecna and the town cracking open. Steve is running around the hospital between Max and Eddie’s room and threatening doctors if they even look at Eddie sideways or if he thinks Max isn't getting proper treatment.

So they just… don’t really cross paths. Argyle’s heard some of the stories about Steve from Jon, so he’s not too quick to go seek him out and Steve just could not care less about the other new guy along for the ride, he's too busy. Doesn’t even learn his name until about two weeks after they get to town and Robin dragged him by his ear to the cabin bc it was the only other place he'd relent to being at the moment.

Their first full conversation is actually about Argyle's daily foraging. He sees Argyle walking around, avoiding the traps and occassionally stopping to pick something and drop it in his bag. So, he's curious, and Steve's been friends with genius children and Robin long enough to be a good listener for things he doesn't quite get, but unlike the fifteen year old assholes Argyle seems cool with answering his questions.

With the ground kind of rotting out from the cracks in Hawkins, and the increasing likelihood the gov is gunna put up a quarantine any day now, they talk about how to best dry and keep things. Medicinal vs Food, how they can sub out ingredients in recipes for what they can find because it turned out they were both pretty damn good cooks.

From then on it just kind of turns into a Thing.

They both see how the other isn't really taken seriously by anyone in the group. Like, their respective best friends love them and don't look down on them, but there's always this kind of air that whenever they open their mouths they're gunna get some eyerolls. Argyle is the guy who can drive, Steve is the guy that gets hit a lot. They're not really necessary for planning.

So they help as much as they can in other places, together.

They make sure the group is fed, and sleeps, and doesn't do anything that raises their potential of being killed any more than necessary. (Joyce and Hop try, they really do, but they're busy harrassing government officials)

Jon hates how they get along, like, don’t get him wrong he knows Steve’s changed, is a good guy and all that, but come on Argyle is his best friend thanks and with how weird everything had been with Nancy he’d really like custody of Argyle back thanks.

Robin thinks it’s nice Steve has another friend their age, and knows how much easier having him around made getting used to the whole Monsters Are Real thing. (That being said, they require a certain amount of Robin-Steve one on one time or they WILL die. Or at the very least be insufferable to everyone around them)

Argyle got Steve into pineapple on pizza.

Steve braids Argyle’s hair whenever he needs to get it out of the way.

They talk to each other about their parental situations, about feeling like they’d never be what their parents wanted them to be. Argyle’s parents worked hard, wanted him to go to university and find a well-paying career; didn’t like that he was perfectly content with community college and kind of just wanted to open up his own restaurant one day. Steve's pretty sure his parents were disappointed the day he was born, and completely gave up by the time he only got back rejection letters. Argyle misses his, they were so worried when he’d gone missing for a few days, and their worry didn’t get any less when he finally called and told them where he was, but they’re not going to force him back. Steve’s parents still haven’t called, and he wonders if they remember that he’s still in Hawkins at all.

They don't hang out all the time. They've each got their respective best friends, and Argyle and Jon are usually the only two who manage to wrangle Mike, Will, and El. Who are constantly trying to sneak away to enact some half-baked plan they're sure will end it this time. Steve's got Dustin and Erica by the scruffs of their necks half the time, and his hands still full at the hospital the other.

They find out the two of them make a really good monster hunting pair though. Rob, Steve and Argyle end up on the same Team during scraps with the Upside Down Monsters. They've both got the most insane observation skills. Each quick on their feet and are really good with improvised weaponry. (Robin's able to fill in the pieces based on things they point out, is kind of the only one who really takes what they say seriously enough to utilise it.)

Argyle becomes the second person to come out to him on a bathroom floor while bloody. Argyle doesn't even really think anything of it, didn't even realise Steve hadn't known about his gigantic crush on Jonathan, just made an offhand joke about hoping his best friend thought the new gash on the side of his arm was as cool as the matching one he had with Nancy. They apent about an hour just talking about how he'd liked Jon from the moment he met him. Thought the awkward loner was cute and sweet and even after he found out he had a girlfriend back home he'd still wanted to be around him. Was content to be his best friend as long as he was happy, and did his best to move on with other people he could see himself caring for.

About a month after Eddie's back, Steve makes the third coming out to happen while bleeding on a bathroom floor. He'd kind of already known that he liked guys, but hadn't ever really thought too hard about it before. But he was having a bit of a freak out and Argyle and Rob both just squeezed into the dry bathtub with him. Let him have a full panic about liking a guy he'd kind of hated before spring break, a most likely straight guy who'd bodied a demodog that'd tried to sneak up on him and- hey did he mention just how hot that had been after they'd both calmed down from a mutual panic attack?

After that Rob, Argyle, and Steve will occassionally just get together to scream about their crushes. Robin still not sure what's happening with Vickie but they held hands guys, girls hold their friend's hands alll the time though right???

They smoke about it, a lot.py

#thank you so much I just need to talk about them or I’ll die actually #argyle (stranger things)#steve harrington #sorry this took a couple of days my sibling was getting married and prep was HECTIC #there's some slight jargyle rockie and steddie in here #but the main focus is argyle and steve #i defintiely have about a million different little hc's for their friendship #i just!!! think they're both so underestimated #so you put them together and they'd be able to value each other's opinions like no one else seems to be able to #and!!! they often ask very reasonable questions and point the right stuff out!!!#sorry they are... important to me #i'm in love with argyle and steve individually in general so just... slap them together okey #Robin: oh thank god he has a second friend. i was worried. last time i hung out with someone else i cam home and he was sitting on my steps #so yeah there's more my head's just on 50% sorry #pyreposting #pyresmailbox

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jixic · 1 year

Text

𝐍𝐀𝐕𝐈𝐆𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍 !

Stolitz, Regressor!Stolas, Caregiver!Blitzø, tiny lil bit ooc

1.320 words

The palace was eerily quiet.

He knew no one besides Stolas and some sleeping servants were inside, But Blitzø couldn’t help but feel slightly intimidated by the completely quiet, dark and absolutely humongous room.

He understood the Goetia’s were like 13 feet tall, but was it all really necessary?

Blitzø chuckled to himself, flinching when the noise echoed.

When they were kids he thought people were spilling a load of bullshit when they said you could never be taller than a Goetia. Now look at him, Stolas is one of the shorter Goetia’s and Blitzø still barely reaches his hips.

"Stolas? I'm here!" He yelled out, maybe if he caught Stolas's attention he'd turn the lights on. He waited, crossing his arms.

He groaned when there was no response, not even a 'blitzy!'. "Stolas! Asshole! Turn on the lights!" He tried again, but still no response sounded back.

"I guess i need to find his room myself.. again." Blitzø cracked his knuckles, setting off on his search.

He would be lying if he said he wasn't even remotely concerned. Stolas would never ignore him like this! Was he hurt? Taken? Dead?

"God forbid he already gagged himself.." Blitzø tried, an awkward smile crossing his features. Though it couldn't fight his growing worries.

"Stolas! Seriously! You're worrying me!" Blitzø yelled, biting on his nails. His tail wagged anxiously behind him. "If this is some kind of joke, it isn't funny! Tell me where you are Stolas!"

He vaguely remembered crossing this hallway before, he knew that picture of Stolas with Octavia. It was burned into his mind. Stolas looked so happy.

He froze. Was that crying?

It seemed he found Stolas's room.

"Stolas? Are you in there?" Blitzø knocked, though letting himself in either way. His question wasn't answered, but he could make out the silhouette of a curled up Stolas.

"Hey, it's me, you know, for our full moon arrangement? That was supposed to be tonight?"

Glowing red eyes peeked out from the curled up form, to examine the imp that had just entered.

"Bli… uhm." Finally a response! Blitzø could have cheered then and there. But why did he stop in the middle of his name?

"Stolas.. are you okay?" He asked, walking over to the prince. Admittedly, he now knew Stolas was alive and well just sitting on his bed. But now he was wondering why he was being ignored.

Stolas made little noises of thought, humming slightly. "Bli…zzz? Blis?" He tried, making said imp raise a brow.

Why was Stolas struggling with pronouncing his name? "It's Blitzø. Remember?" He sat next to the prince, looking at him with concern in his eyes.

There was a certain.. innocence to his look. How he stared at Blitzø with those big bug eyes of his. Completely wide and seemingly curious.

"Blisy!" The owl yelled, before throwing his weight onto the imp who fell back with a yelp.

He cuddled into Blitzø's chest, smiling happily.

Blitzø didn't get it, Stolas was currently seemingly so happy, so curious, so innocent.. so child-like… oh fuck.

The realization hit Blitzø like a brick to his forehead.

Stolas had told him about this before, just in case, but he hadn't actually seen it happen yet.

What was it.. regressing? Yes it had to be that! Stolas had mentioned it when they were talking at some point. Blitzø hadn't really made a point to remember it, thinking it'd never occur he needed to anyway.

And now here he sat, having absolutely no idea what to do while Stolas laid on him regressed.

Just his luck.

"Hey Stols, Are you uhm.." How was he even supposed to go about asking this?! Stolas looked up, something akin to innocence and child-like curiosity floating in those red eyes of his.

Blitzø always thought you could never tell how he felt with his eyes being one color and all. But the more he fell into the rabbit hole that was Stolas. The more he noticed the small ways his eyes would change.

He loved it.

"How old are you?" Blitzø decided on, ruffling through Stolas's feathers, the bird letting out something similar to a purr. Blitzø lightly chuckled.

Stolas responded with some humming, narrowing his eyes in focus. "Four!" He exclaimed happily.

Now, Blitzø wasn't a complete asshole, no, But he couldn't let this opportunity slide just like that.

"Oh? I really do have a little baby on my hands here." He teased, ever so gently as to not spark that uncomfortable feeling in Stolas he knew all too well.

Stolas pouted, sticking out his tongue. "Not a baby!" Blitzø laughed, rolling his eyes.

"Whatever gets you to sleep at night, Stols." Blitzø smiled, allowing the owl to cuddle closer. Stolas let out a content hoot, smiling brightly. “You’re actually being kinda cute.” Blitzø chuckled, tracing a few shapes on Stolas’s back.

Stolas pouted again, burying his face in the imp’s neck. “Not cute..” He muttered.

Blitzø barked out a laugh, pinching at the owl’s side to get some giggly hoots out of him. “Accept that you’re being all cute while cuddly like this.” The imp teased, taking the prince into a tight hug.

“Blisy!” Stolas exclaimed, trying to pry the imp off of him. Blitzø merely giggled in response.

“Especially with that little new found lisp of yours. I forgot you had one when you were little.” He merely teased further despite Stolas’s protests, poking at his cheeks.

“Cute little owlet with his silly little lisp.” Blitzø took on a baby voice, pressing a gentle kiss to the owl’s puffed out cheeks.

“Geez now i get why you like little kids so much, i’ve been doing this for like 5 minutes and i’m already having fun.” Blitzø said, honestly talking to himself more than he was to Stolas. He chuckled when Stolas tilted his head in confusion with a small hoot.

Blitzø cooed, receiving a whine in response. He gently lifted the owl up, so he could sit up himself in a more comfortable position.

As soon as he sat, Stolas immediately dropped his head back down onto Blitzø’s lap.

“Well i guess fuc…. screwing your brains out is off the table for now huh?” Stolas didn’t respond, merely cuddling further into the imp’s lap. Blitzø assumed he didn't understand what was being said, so he hugged the owl closer with a gentle giggle.

"Blisy.." Stolas mumbled, while reaching to cup Blitzø's cheeks. Blitzø laughed and gently pried the bird's determined hands away. "Yes hun, i'm here. Silly owlet."

Blitzø's eyes widened. He quietly laughed to himself when Stolas tilted his head in question.

"I've had you like this for so little yet i've already called you a variety of nicknames." He ruffled the owl's feathers. "You bring the sappiest out of me." He smiled, the soft smile turning to an amused grin when Stolas attempted an evil laugh.

An attempt that came out adorably.

"Nice try." Blitzø teased. Stolas pouted in response, shoving his head back into Blitzø's chest. "Better luck next time." Blitzø shrugged, smiling all the while.

The imp gently giggled when Stolas whined, gently pinching his feathered sides to get another sweet giggle out of him.

The two settled into a comforting silence, Blitzø stroking the owl's back while Stolas responded with small content hoots. As Blitzø allowed himself to drown in the peaceful expression the prince wore.

His eyes hit the dried up tears on Stolas's cheeks.

He'd honestly forgotten, the owl was crying when he came in. Whatever caused him to cry must have also caused… this. Blitzø couldn't fight the concern growing in him. But he couldn't bring himself to disturb the owl either.

He watched the owl fighting sleep for a bit longer, a desperate battle he could see. He chuckled when Stolas inevitably lost.

As the owl's soft breath evened out, Blitzø decided that would be a question for tomorrow.

#Helluva Boss #Stolitz #HB #Fandom agere #sfw agere #agere #regressor!Stolas #Caregiver!Blitzø #helluva boss fanfiction #helluva boss fic #agere fic #i promise i normally write better but this was self indulgent and i needed to get something out #i noticed a severe lack of regressor stolas and decided fix this immediatly with the worst fic i've ever written #enjoy

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tears0fsatan · 2 years

Note

Hi! May I request a trans masc MC who is very proud about who they are and aren't like. Idk hiding the fact that they are trans? As someone who is very proud of who I am I want to see the demon bros with an MC who's like, "oh yeah I'm trans, got a problem with that then you can get punched in the throat🧍."

Tysm!

𖥻 characters... demon brothers, diavolo x trans m!reader

𖥻 genre... drabbles + a tiny bit of angst if u squint + mainly crack lolol

𖥻 warnings... mentions of transphobia [some demon doesn't respect ur pronouns :gasp:], swearing, a lil bit of fighting but nothing physical, short!mc bc i hc that demons are bigger than humans hehe, mc is a menace but they love u anyways

𖥻 a.n... HELP MEE I LOVE THIS 😭😭 IM ALSO LIKE THIS IM SO GLAD YOU REQUESTED THIS ANON I LOVE YOU also side note i had so many ideas for this that wouldn't really fit into one large chunk of writing so i went with drabbles i hope thats alright with u anon !!! idk if u can tell but i'm not caught up with the lore lolol i haven't gotten past lesson 25 heh

from the moment you had arrived in devildom, you had been the epitome of chaos.

diavolo had called you by your deadname, which you rightfully objected to. the second you interrupted diavolo, lucifer was on his feet ready to murder you. it wasn't until you had explained the situation that lucifer calmed down and diavolo profusely apologised, stating that he hadn't known and was more than willing to respect your name and pronouns.

to say you were shocked would be an understatement, especially after finding out just who diavolo was. though you hadn't quite grasped what your new reality was, you did realise that these "demons" were no joke. but even though they were demons, they had taken your gender identity and pronouns more seriously than a lot of humans you've told.

from the get go, lucifer knew you would be a handful. great, he thought, another nuisance to add to his list of problems. however, he hadn't expected you to be this boisterous.

and while he grew to love how you didn't take shit from anyone, it didn't mean you weren't the cause of his migraines ninety percent of the time.

"you're punishing me because i'm trans, aren't you?" you joked, which only made the first born roll his eyes, pulling laughs out of the brothers who watched.

"for the last time, i'm lecturing you because you skipped classes to play hooky with that fool next to you, and when you were asked why you did it, your response was and i quote 'be gay, do crimes'." the seriousness on lucifer's face as he said that had you doing everything in your power to hold back your laugh, only for you to slip up and let out a squeak of laughter.

the other six lounged on the couch behind you, finding the situation just as hilarious as you if their cackles were anything to go by.

"suck my ten inch dick you fucking loser!" you yelled out behind you to mammon as you ran around the HOL sitting room, jumping over belphie who was casually sleeping on the floor, causing the lounging brothers to look up from what they were doing.

"hey." lucifer warned, eyes trained on the documents he was reading, occasionally throwing a glance at the commotion.

"fuck you! you don't even have a dick! gimme goldie back ya tree stump!" mammon cried out, chasing you as you went to hide behind the couch where satan and asmodeus sat, watching the show with amusement in their eyes.

"language!" lucifer chided while massaging the bridge of his nose, knowing full well no one was even listening.

"that's not what you were saying last night!" you replied, yelping when the second born nearly got a hold of your shirt.

"that don't even make sense! lucifer, help me out here will ya?!"

"you started this, you deal with the consequences." lucifer sighed out, but the smile on his face betrayed his faux exasperation.

you screamed when mammon tried barrelling towards you, only for beelzebub to pick up his defiant older brother and walk away with him in his arms.

"stop yelling, can't focus on eating when you're chasing mc." beel said with an ice lolly hanging from his lips.

you had known you were bound to run into some demons that opposed your gender identity, and that's why you were in this situation right now.

you were in a lust demon's face, more than ready to throw hands if the situation called for it.

they had mocked you by using the wrong set of pronouns on you and when you tried to correct them, they simply rolled their eyes and laughed.

if you were in a cartoon, you were sure to have the cross popping veins above your head right now.

"you either use my preferred pronouns or i'll hit you in the jaw with a fucking brick." you spat at them, beyond ready to make your threat a reality.

"mc!" you heard satan call from across the hallway, making your head snap towards him.

the fourth born quickly made his way towards you and started dragging you away, all the while telling you off about how you just couldn't pick fights in the middle of a RAD hallway right before fifth period.

you had blocked him out for the most part, choosing to shoot daggers at the demon from earlier, moving to mouth a clear 'i will feed you to cerberus' you knew would make belphie proud.

"mc, pleaseeeee." levi whined, following you as you manoeuvred around the kitchen.

"fine! but let me think about it!" you gave up, throwing your hands in the air before turning to the demon behind you.

levi cheered and pumped his fist in the air before you interrupted his celebration, "if it's another short chatacter, my answer is no."

leviathan cried out, letting out something akin to a groan, a whine and a cry at the same time.

"IT IS?" you shouted. truthfully, you had just been joking, taking a playful guess as to what he wanted to dress you up in, but you never thought you would nail the hammer on the head.

"mc, last one i swear! after this one i'll give you the tall characters!" he continued to whine, going as far as to follow you into your room.

"you said that last time!" came your rebuttal.

".... but you'd look so cute as the short one.." without a warning, leviathan shoved his DDD in your face with a picture of the characters he wanted you and him to cosplay.

... and you had to admit, you would look good as the short one.

you huffed, "you win, but this is the last time, levi! i mean it! no more cute characters for me! i wanna cosplay badass characters!"

the avatar of envy let out an excited squeak and nodded so fast you worried he would get whiplash. he practically ran out of your room, probably off to order your costume on akuzon and you sighed, knowing that this time would in fact not be the last time.

"you don't think i'm strong enough to do it?" you asked tauntingly, and beel shrugged.

"i didn't think humans could be strong." the avatar of gluttony admitted and continued on walking, moving past you and setting the box down.

"well i am but... i.. i just don't want to!" you huffed and looked away.

the demon paused from picking up the next box and looked at you for a while, giving you a look that you recognised to be one of amusement.

"... you don't believe me, do you?" you stepped forward, making a go for the box beel was reaching for. said demon watched you, staring at your arms in a 'are you sure about this' manner.

"s-see! i'm doing just fuh-fine!" you somehow managed to wheeze out, the enchanted package being far heavier than you anticipated. maybe the tall demon was right, maybe humans weren't strong enough to carry cursed boxes but you weren't about to tell him that.

"you're going to blow out your back." beelzebub wasted no time in taking the box from your arms before you could hurt yourself, gently placing it amongst the other bewitched boxes all while making it seem as though it were weightless.

"i swear! i'm stronger than every other man!" you shouted as he picked you up and carried you under his arm.

the demon didn't reply, simply walking out of the door with you squirming in his grasp, promising that there was no man out there stronger than you.

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