#since i saw a few posts about specifically the likes portion today

[lifesliced]

ik some people were worried about some of the new features, including likes from mutuals showing up, but there's a way to shut that off (just in case anyone else was curious, that's how you can get rid of some of these rather annoying dash features)

#it's just in dashboard preferences and im sure everyone has seen this but just in case #since i saw a few posts about specifically the likes portion today #hopefully this helps! #and hopefully they keep the ability to just shut these features off as a thing

[poptod]

Autumn Rain (ahkmenrah x reader)

Description: Ahk sneaks out in the middle of the night to go see you.

Notes: wow me posting a oneshot while working on a bigger story? incredible. quick note since its been a while since yall had to put up with my bullshit: you have a name in this (bc i wanted accurate history) if you want to know youre from assyrian highlands, and you dont fully know the egyptian language. enjoy! WC: 2.2k

+

Clouds rolled faintly in the distance as Ahk tip-toed through the palace, searching for a specific back door. He went without shoes, making his footsteps silent against the stone floor. Still he moved slowly, only hurrying when he saw torch lights in the distance, which alerted him of any guard or noble wandering the palace. If anyone caught him, he would have to try and explain to his father what he was doing. His father would not understand.

Earlier today, as you cleaned in the school where he learned, he asked if you were available to speak with him in the night; you said yes, and thus he dressed himself come midnight, sneaking out through a wooden door barely anyone knew about. In his plain, knee-length skirt and nothing else, he thought himself an unremarkable man. Anyone who didn't personally know his face would likely not recognize him as the Prince. That would work perfectly for your family, as well➖you, your mother, your father, and all your siblings, were servants of priests and nobles who worked in Osiris' temple. Any communication with the students in the House of Life was forbidden, especially when the student in question was the Pharaoh's son. You didn't really seem to understand the rules very well, though➖you carried this freeness that was so absent from the priest's control that Ahkmen knew immediately upon meeting you that you weren't raised in Egypt.

It was something he adored about you. You treated him so differently from anybody else; he craved it, and it drove him to endanger the both of you for a quiet meeting in the night.

Few people were still awake at this time. Some houses still had their torches and fire pits going, within which tired women placed bread to bake away in the heat. Most children were asleep, but many older men were still awake drinking away frothy beer or helping their family to knead dough. Some families sat beneath the stars, drinking and smoking together. Your family was among the active ones, with your mother weaving in the outer portion of your house, where the remnants of a fire burned away in a pit, and your two younger brothers had drawn a game board in the sand.

Your mother raised her head when she saw him coming; his shoeless feet, though silent in the palace, still ground against the sandy paths as he stepped up to your low gate.

"Uh, hello," he said with an uncertain smile, raising his hand for only a second. "I'm here to see, uh, Khani?"

"Oh?" She smiled in a teasing manner. "What's your name?"

"Um -" he hadn't thought this far, "- Ah.. med."

"Ahmed?" She repeated.

He nodded.

"Khani?!" Your mother yelled back into the house, and the two of them watched the empty doorway for you.

After the sound of running footsteps you appeared, a bright and warm smile already on your face.

"Hey!!" You shouted out, and ran over to him, opening the gate as fast as you could to lead him inside. "It is so late, why are we talking at this time?"

Your voice grew slowly quieter as you took him inside, ignoring how your mother smirked at you. Ahkmen himself was a little too starstruck to say anything either➖you were holding his hand as you dragged him along. He could barely walk straight when you did that.

He had been to your home once before, but it still surprised him with how small it was. The kitchen and sitting area was outside in that small courtyard entrance, and inside was the sleeping area. Several blankets and woven reed mats marked each spot except yours.

Unlike the rest of your family➖and unlike most of the families of Egypt➖you had your own enclosed space beneath the limestone and plaster stairs, whose thin entrance was marked by a floor-length banner. It had a low, declining ceiliing and enough space for about four people to fit with their shoulders crammed together, but it also had a window, through which Ahk could see the distant mountains and the clouds that rolled over them like sand on the Sahara's hills. Through those thick clouds, the full moon shone in a frail silhouette.

"Sit down," you said, "it is not good to stand in here. It will hurt your neck."

He looked down and realized that you were sitting at the head of your bed. It was about all that could fit in here; your bed on the floor, a broom, and a storage chest carrying large blankets.

"Oh," he said quietly, and sat down across from you at the foot of the bed.

"So did you need to say anything? You were... a little..." you tried to translate the words in your head, "bad feeling, I thought."

"Odd?" He offered.

"Yes," you said with a chuckle. "Were you?"

"No, no, I just wanted to see you without worrying about getting caught by a bunch of old priests," he said, shaking his head as he leant back. "I mean, the temple's House of Life is not a good place to make friends with servants when you're a Prince. So many people find such offense in it."

"I see what you are saying," you nodded. "Had someone seen you when you left tonight?"

"Nope!" He grinned, and placed his shoeless feet in front of him. "Quiet as a dormouse."

"You walked all the way here without shoes?" You asked, your eyes widening immensely with humor.

"You do it all the time."

"Because I do not have shoes. You have shoes, your feet do not know how the rocks feel! They are not hard-skinned like I am!"

Ahkmen was giggling the entire time you were talking, and was attempting to stifle his reaction the entire time, as well. His hands were covering his mouth, but you could still see his shoulders wracking with laughter, the redness of his cheeks, and his creased eyes. Something about you yelling made you look so harmless, like you were so bad at looking angry that you ended up smiling. He wanted to pull your face over to him and kiss you, but he didn't.

"I just went on the roads, don't worry," he said once his laughter calmed down enough for words. "And the sand isn't burning hot since the sun is dead."

"I know, but they are still sharp. I am worried about you, sometimes," you said in a quieter voice.

"I've noticed. You've got no reason to worry about me," he said with a shrug. "I should be more worried about you than you me."

"No, no, no, that is not right," you chuckled. "I have a good family, so I will always be happy. Your family is... not as happy. That is the most dangerous thing in the world."

"Unhappy families?"

You nodded and hummed your affirmation.

"I have seen what having no friends or family does to a person. It is not nice," you said.

"Certainly. But at least I don't have to worry about food, or about higher-ups breathing down my neck."

"I do not worry about that either." You hunched your shoulders, and crept along the bed to him. "I am quiet as a mouse." You pawed at the sheets. "I do something wrong and they come, I go running in the holes in the wall! They never find me there."

Ahkmen had to cover his mouth again to keep from laughing as you drew nearer.

"If I am hungry I go to the Nile and catch fish. Very easy," you finished, popping back up into a sitting position beside him, your legs almost touching.

"You're like a cat," he grinned.

You fell back with laughter.

As he chuckled softly, he noticed a white noise in the silence, and recalled the storm clouds looming over the western mountains. His brow furrowed, and he pulled away the thick, fabric curtain in front of your tiny bedroom window.

"I think it's raining out," he said, craning his neck to see past the empty frame.

"It is?!"

You jumped up, sticking half your body out the window in your excitement. Ahk's eyes widened, a burst of laughter coming out when you let out a shout.

"Ah!!" You cried. "It is!"

You sat back down on your butt, a starstruck smile on your face as you stared out the window, watching the rain fall in sheets. You took a deep breath and sighed, resting your chin on the windowsill.

Ahk waited, scanning your bedazzled expression and trying to commit it to memory. The joy you found in such small things sparked his own desire to find happiness in the world, which was a hard thing for him to do when his world was saturated with gold and claims that the wealthy were more holy than others.

He found himself wandering off in thought, and slowly brought himself back. When he came to, you were still staring out the window with wide, glittering eyes.

"You alright?" He asked, raising a single brow.

You hummed a small confirmation but still did not move. He huffed in amusement, leaning back on the plaster wall.

His eyes automatically traced your face once more, from the curve of your jaw to the shape of your nose and the fluttering of your eyelashes in the soft winds. The scent of rain wafted in through that small hole in the wall, filling the space between you with the somber air of autumn. To him, autumn had always been a time of being stuck in the palace. He abandoned his friendships in town for months as his father called forward the cold air as an excuse as to why he couldn’t leave. It was what he always remembered in these times. Now the memories were being rewritten, and he realized that years from now, whenever autumn came, he would think of you.

He was reaching forward. His fingers, almost shaking as they grew near, tangled in your curled hair, pulling at its perfect form. Even then you didn't turn to him, only breathing softer as your eyes closed.

He tried to swallow through the knot welling up in his throat, and managed to just barely push it down. And, instead of passing out, he reached forward and began to braid your hair. While separating the strands of your hair, he shuffled into a better position behind you. His stomach and chest were pressed to your back as he leant over you. Below him, you relaxed into the warmth, squishing your cheek into the window's edge.

You were a wonderful distraction from anything he was trying to do; it was one of the reasons he was doing poorly in school as of late. So to avoid this while he was braiding your hair, he stared at your earring, which was an ankh that he had given you a while ago. It allowed you to blend in a little better at the temple since you weren't actually Egyptian.

He finished the first braid, and seeing that you still weren't moving, he worked on the next, watching as droplets began to coat your skin. He wanted to pull you inside, to wash away the cold and wrap you up in blankets near the indoor fireplace. He wanted you to hide your face in his chest.

"You are such a child of the rain," he said instead, and leaned his tired back forward, resting his chin on your shoulder. "I am more a child of the fire."

"I think you are, yes," you said with a giggle. For another moment you lingered on the sky before turning your head to face him. "You are bright as the sun."

Ahkmen found then that whenever you looked at him, words fell silently from his lips, shed but not spoken, like they were desperate to escape but too shy to be recognized. You just smiled, melting his heart before you turned back to the window. He hesitantly took his spot on your shoulder once more, trailing to where you watched the rain.

"You mistake me," he murmured, turning his gaze to what little he could see of you. "Fire burns not in the day, but in the night, when it is needed most. It is a light under the moon."

Unwittingly, he leaned in closer, brushing his nose underneath your ear. There he kissed your dangling ankh earring, pressing the cool metal to your neck. He paused, lingering on your warmth on his lips.

You shifted beneath him, breaking him of his trance and instead bringing him a moment of panic. His cheeks began to burn, and he pushed himself away from you. At that you turned, pressing yourself up to the wall, and staring wide-eyed at him in complete silence.

"I - I'm s-"

"Is that something you do in Egypt a lot?" You asked, sitting stock still.

"No," he answered honestly.

"Why did you do it?"

His face was on fire as he replied.

"Because I like you... a lot..." he mumbled, rubbing his face with his hands.

"Okay. Good," you said, grabbed him by his skirt, and pulled him into your lap, tugging his facing down to kiss him.

This time, your lips collided with all the heat of a fire and the shivering chill of the midnight rain. His heart was shaking as he grasped you, tightening his fingers around your waist to pull you closer to him. He desperately needed to breathe through his state of near panic, but he was convinced nothing was as important as you, and let you play with him as you pleased till you deemed fit.

He nearly passed out before you pulled away.

"I am sorry," you murmured, rubbing your palm over his thigh and under his skirt. "Are you okay?"

"I think I'm going to faint if you keep touching me like that, but yes," he chuckled out in a breath.

You grinned and kissed him again.

#ahkmenrah x reader #Ahkmenrah #Night at the Museum #rami malek #ahkmenrah x male reader #ahkmenrah x female reader

[singtheskyandfightlikehell]

BatFamily Headcanons: Stuffed Animals

In an attempt to productively combat my recent writer’s block, I’m practicing writing the batfam characters through short character study fics (which I will post once I make enough) and comparative headcanons. I might end up making short fics out of these, as well, since some of them got a bit long anyways

Today I decided to explore how many stuffed animals each member of the batfam (plus an adjacent character or two) has, what they think of them, how they got them, etc. I’ve got eleven characters on this list (and I’m still missing some, sorry)

Bruce:

Bruce put aside stuffed animals when he was eleven, deciding it was time to become serious. However, since acquiring children, he has been gifted a number of stuffed animals, ranging from a small and realistic brown bat to a child-sized bear wearing his cape and cowl. None of the children know this, but he keeps them all in a prominent position in his walk-in closet. Sometimes, when he has a particularly nasty fight with one of his kids, or he discovers something (like an injury) that they were hiding from him, he’ll tell the stuffed animals all the things he struggles to tell his children in the hopes that, one day, he’ll figure out how to express himself when it actually counts.

Alfred:

Alfred has no stuffed animals of his own, but he keeps the old, worn teddy bear that was once Thomas’ and later Bruce’s, alongside the somewhat lopsided bunny that Martha attempted to sew for Bruce when he was two. They sit side by side in a spotless glass cabinet filled with other memories that various members of the family have at one point or another attempted to cast aside.

Dick:

Dick has a pair of stuffed elephants, Eleonore and Zitka, and a teddy bear of his own, all from the circus. Most of the time they sit on the shelf under one of his nightstands, but when he has a particularly bad day, he’ll hold them all tightly until he falls asleep. If he’s crying, he finds it slows the tears to press kisses to the tops of their heads, or just smoosh his whole face into them. Sometimes, if he’s having a particularly good day – especially if no one else is sharing in his good mood – he’ll tell them about whatever made him happy. The rarest occasions are a bittersweet combination of both, the moments when he dwells on his happiest memories of his parents. When this happens, he is more likely to address them than his family, talking to them like old friends who were “there” for the things he’s recalling. It reminds him of the parties he would host as a small child, attended by his stuffed animals and his parents and sometimes other people from the giant family that was Haly’s, and for just that moment he’ll feel suspended somewhere between grief and content.

Barbara:

Barbara had lots of stuffed animals growing up, but as she got older, she gave most of them away. The only one she kept was a little otter that her father gave her for her first birthday. She doesn’t remember this, of course, but they have an old home video of that day which she’s seen a few times, and she know it’s one of her dad’s favorites to watch when he’s feeling nostalgic. She does remember the way she used to drag the otter with her everywhere she went when she was about four, and it’s so worn now that all of its original fluffiness has disappeared. She sets it up near her main computer and uses it in place of a rubber duck.

Jim:

When Babs decided she was too old for her stuffed animals, Jim was instructed to give them away at one of the Gotham children’s toy drives he helps run as commissioner. Only about half of them ever make it out of the house, because he keeps looking at them and remembering little moments that involve each of them. He has two boxes full of them that he swears he’s going to bring to the next drive, but he’s been swearing that for over ten years now.

Jason:

When Jason first arrived at the manor, he swore up and down that stuffed animals were dumb kids toys that he was way too old for. The first time Dick showed up at the manor after Jason was there, he brought a plush dog he’d picked up on the way there, unsure what to get his surprise new brother but not putting an excess of thought into it either. After all, he wasn’t about to ask Bruce what Jason might like. Jason made a show of scorn and tossing the toy in the trash, but when Dick was gone he dug it back out. When he was sleeping, he clutched the dog protectively against his chest like it might be snatched away at any time. When he wasn’t sleeping, he kept it hidden in a box wedged under a floorboard beneath the bed, alongside his other contraband. It was there when he died and it’s still there now. Every time he’s in the manor, he thinks about sneaking into his old room to retrieve it, alongside some of his other old belongings, but he never does. His reasoning alternates between not caring, being too old for toys, not wanting to set foot in his old room, and not wanting to get caught caring after all these years.

He does however have an obnoxiously long bright red snake that Roy won at some sort of archery carnival game while they were supposed to be tracking a suspect. He’d griped at Roy for wasting time with frivolous games, a complaint that was very on brand for their relationship. He’s pretty sure Roy saw through him, though, and understood the real reason he was so antsy to leave the carnival, given his soft apology later that night. He also recently acquired a floppy stingray, a gift from Lian for his latest birthday. She told him that she’d gotten to pet a stingray at the aquarium where she’d bought it, and it reminded her of him. Specifically, she’d said he was, “Kinda dangerous and maybe a little scary, but actually really soft to anyone who’s nice enough”. He wasn’t sure how he felt about that description, but the gift had a place of pride, resting atop an old model of his helmet that Roy had “defaced” with a sweet message that always made Jason smile.

Cass:

Cass grew up without stuffed animals, and was honestly a little confused at first about why she might want one. The first one she ever got was a tiny key-chain cat that was given to her by a little girl she saved. She was unsure what to make of the object itself, but she treasured it as a symbol, proof that she was doing good in the world. It was Steph who convinced her to look for more, to look for stuffed animals in her “style”. Eventually, she got two of the most different ones she could find: an iridescent octopus packed tightly with beans and made of a coarse fabric, and a large fluffy goose that squished like a cloud and was made of the softest fabric imaginable. She likes tossing the octopus lightly in the air to feel the weight of it, and faceplanting into the giant goose. She also has a big bear holding a plush heart that Steph got her for their first Valentine’s.

Tim:

Tim’s relationship with stuffed animals is a bit more complicated. He had five growing up: a dog, a bear, a lion, a rabbit, and a lamb. They had names, stories, personalities, and they were his friends (his only friends, at the time). When he was seven, he woke up one day to find them gone. His mother scolded him for his tears, explaining that he was too old for baby toys, and that his attachment to them would only hinder his path forward. For years, he felt ashamed whenever he thought of his grief towards them, because he knew they were just toys, he knew he was being a baby about it, and yet…

It wasn’t until he was fifteen years old and stumbled across an article about autistic people and the projection of feelings onto objects that he understood why he had been willing to sneak out at night to search through pawn store after pawn store and – once – the landfill in the hopes of seeing his beloved toys again. As a teen in the Wayne household, he knew he could get as many stuffed animals as he liked, but he couldn’t bring himself to do so after what had happened before. He got one giant, floppy moose, barely half a foot shorter than himself, that he clings to like an octopus when he manages to lay down, whether he succeeds in falling asleep or not. Additionally, on a night after Jason made amends with the family, Tim returned to his room to find a fifteen inch plush latte with a cute little face on the mug portion and a sticky note on top that simply read: Sorry for trying to kill you a bunch. My bad :) He keeps it on top of his dresser, and while he doesn’t really hug it, he did discover it was the perfect object for chucking at his siblings’ heads whenever the situation calls for it.

Steph:

Steph loves stuffed animals. While she never got any of the fancy brand name ones, or the luxuriously soft ones, or the hyper-realistic ones, her mom had a tradition of buying her one for every birthday, Christmas, and Easter. She soon had quite a collection, and – like Tim – she gave them all names and personalities. She played out complex scenarios with them and the few dolls she had, designing an intricate world of wild concepts and plots. She also used her stuffed animals to conquer her fears, like thunderstorms and darkness, by pretending they were all more scared than she was, so she had to be brave for all of them. Steph still has her whole collection, as well as quite a few “nicer” (though equally loved) ones that she has acquired from various Waynes. At this point, pretty much everyone in the Wayne family has given her a stuffed animal at some time or other. For a couple of years now, she has taken to posing with her massive collection and making fake family Christmas cards to send out to everyone she knows, where she will update them on the well-being of any plushie they’ve given her.

Duke:

Duke also has a great love of stuffed animals, although he doesn’t match Steph for quantity. He only had a few beloved animals growing up, all of which he’s held onto (a panda, a penguin, a turtle, a frog, a leopard, and a pikachu). Since being fostered by Bruce, Duke has taken to searching out and buying only the rarest stuffed animals he can find: an anteater, a platypus, a manatee, a sloth, and an axolotl have made the cut so far. Bruce knows about this and has taken to keeping an eye out for anything interesting whenever he’s out. After accidentally mentioning it at a gala one time, it has since become his favorite topic, as getting drawn into an intense discussion with Bruce Wayne about where to acquire strange plushies for his son elicits one of two reactions from his guests: delighted awws or hilariously awkward attempts to steer the conversation back to high society definitions of business and pleasure. At Duke’s request, a large shelf was built around the top of his room, so that all of his stuffed animals can sit comfortably and be clearly seen.

Damian:

Damian was much like Jason when he arrived at the manor in more ways than one, but his determination to prove himself above stuffed animals was certainly on that list. He sneered at his siblings’ attempts to treat him like the child he swore he wasn’t. And honestly, even after he began to lower his walls just a little, he still wasn’t particularly fond of stuffed animals. Sure, he privately thought they were cute, and sure he might (might) find himself holding one at night if it happened to have been left in his bed by an annoying sibling, but in general he preferred live animals to fake ones. Real animals had personalities and feelings, fake ones did not, it was as simple as that, no matter what Stephanie claimed. But as time went on, Damian found himself acquiring a small army of stuffed animals against his will. Some of his siblings (Jason, Tim, sometimes Duke) gave them to him because they found it funny to watch him growl about how he was not an infant in need of deceitful comforts. Some of his siblings (Dick, Cass, sometimes Duke… sometimes his father as well) would give them to him because they knew he liked animals so they assumed he’d like imitations of animals as well. Steph would just give them to everybody, every now and then. But regardless of motive, Damian soon found his room overflowing with stuffed animals that were moderately cute but ultimately pointless.

It wasn’t until a patrol a few years after he’d taken on the mantle of Robin that he discovered a solution. Tim had hidden a tiny stuffed bear in the medical supply compartment of his utility belt, a felt bandage wrapped around its little head. He hadn’t been wounded, but the young girl he’d rescued had been bleeding from a wound that looked worryingly dirty. The bear had fallen out of the pouch, right into her lap, and she’d stared at it with wide eyes, surprise halting the flow of her tears. She’d held onto it the whole time he disinfected her arm and bandaged it, and afterwards he had insisted she keep it. For the first time that night, she’d smiled. After that, Damian began taking a few of his many stuffed animals out on patrol with him, ready to hand out to any and all injured, lost, or otherwise traumatized children once he’d rescued them from their troubles. Eventually he began running out of toys he’d been gifted, even though he kept getting new ones, so at some point he begins to regularly sneak out for the sole purpose of acquiring stuffed animals to hand out. He never tells his siblings, but he suspects they’ve found out anyway, when the presents they give him drastically decrease in size.

#batfamily #dick grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #duke thomas #cassandra cain #stephanie brown #barbara gordon #jim gordon #bruce wayne #alfred pennyworth #jayroy #stephcass #my headcanons #i stole elements of the hc for dick tim steph and duke from my own personality lmao #also the only portion of this that draws on canon (to my knowledge) is the stuff about dick #i've seen stuff about him having a stuffed elephant with both of those names so i decided to just give him two #can't go wrong with extra elephants #but yeah i hope there's nothing that like blatantly contradicts any of this stuff #i'm trying to speed read a bunch of comics rn but i keep reading like 50s-80s era primarily #so there's a number of characters i haven't really gotten to yet #also i've discovered i find green arrow comics more entertaining so lowkey i keep reading those instead oops #i have a very convoluted list of what i need to read to hit the major plot points of batfam and arrowfam #but i also lowkey feel like major plot point comics are gonna tell me less about characterization #filler episodes are where its at #but there's no reading order lists that give me 'best filler issues' sorted by character

[you-cant-spell-subtext-without]

hello hello hello!  and welcome to Season 12 of Supernatural. 

I admit that initially I STRUGGLED WITH SEASON 12.  I LOATHED the British Men of Letters (other than Lady Antonia Bevell; her hot working mom energy can get it); I have...mixed feelings about Mary; overall it was not a stellar season for me the first go-round.  HOWEVER I shall now give it a second chance,  and look for the subtext within the bad (and if my theory tracks, there will be much subtext as...there is much bad).  Maybe I’ll even develop Ketch appreciation.  **ONWARDS ONCE MORE INTO THE BREACH, MY FRIENDS:

When we last left Dean, I neglected to mention that Amara brought his mom back (this is how much I repressed Mary Winchester I guess?)  We cut to Mary, confused, in a nightgown (I get this is part of the character and that’s why she is wearing it sO wE kNOw iTS rEAlLy MaRY WinCHEstEr because of her nightgown and not Sam Smith’s exquisite face, but honestly WHY - LIKE DID SHE WEAR THE DAMN THING IN HEAVEN THE ENTIRE TIME TOO?).

DEAN [breathing heavily] 

Mom. Listen to me. Your name – your name is Mary Sandra Campbell, okay? You were born December 5, 1954, to Samuel and Deanna Campbell. Your father, he bounced around a lot for, uh, work, and you bounced right along with him, and you ended up in Lawrence, Kansas.

MARY 

How do you know all that?

DEAN 

Dad told me. March 23, 1972, you walked out of a movie theater – Slaughterhouse-Five. You loved it, and you bumped into a big Marine and you knocked him flat on his ass. You were embarrassed, and he laughed it off, said you could make it up to him with a cup of coffee. So, you went to, uh, Mulroney's and you talked and he was cute and he knew the words to every Zeppelin song, so when he asked you for your number, you gave it to him, even though you knew your dad would be pissed. That was the night that – that you met –

MARY 

John Winchester.

DEAN 

August 19, 1975, you were married... in Reno. Your idea. A few years later, I came along, then Sammy.

***DEAN DESCRIBING EVERY DAMN DETAIL OF THIS HAS MURDERED ME.  Also, I know John Winchester “told him the story,” but something about this retelling - these are NOT John Winchester’s words (other than maybe “big Marine”).  The emotions, the feelings, the “you talked and he was cute” Dean is describing is Dean’s retelling, the version he created in his mind of this damn meet-cute, this little love story he played over and over in his head, and that makes me feel warm and tingly and also want to ingest sharp knives.  

***Everyone already knows about the damn Zeppelin reference but just in case you wanted to be tortured, please recall that later on we will get

THIS FUCKING SHIT

Nothing to see here other than Dean using a reference from this LOVE STORY on Cas.  I HATE it here in super hell.  Next rounds on you, Sam.

Anyway, Mary has caught on:

I paused here just now because I had a tHoUGHt.  This season is all about exploring Dean and Sam in their role as sons (this is discussed at the SDCC panel prior to the season; btw they are all free on Prime and I recommend watching before you start each new season for little “reveals” behind some of the plot lines).  We know Sam has no relationship to Mary really, he was a baby when she died, but Dean was a little boy - with a personality, character traits, identifying characteristics that his mother probably knew like the back of her hand.  That’s why my first run-in with Mary left a bad taste in mouth during this season - LIKE THIS IS YOUR KID, and there is NO inkling or recognition until THIS moment?  In a show that just spent an entire season exploring the “unexplained connection” between Dean and GODS SISTER, there no immediate “OH” from his own mother?!

But then I realized why she only connected at this very moment.  This particular moment - and not the moment where he lists the factual details about her before the story of the night she met John.  That little story with all those cute details - that’s the part of Dean that Mary knew before she died - when that part was ALL of Dean.  Before hunting, before John’s quest for revenge turned him into the person he is today, before he saw himself as a blunt little instrument.  That’s why initially Mary has no recognition that this is her son - because the Dean she knew was sensitive, and kind, and OPEN, and liked love stories, and laughing, and warm hugs and maybe flowers. Because if you think about it WE DONT KNOW THAT DEAN.  We only know Dean AMD. (After Mary’s Death).

*****************************************************************************************************

So maybe Mary represents Dean Before Mary’s Death, and whatever part of that Dean remains, no matter how deep he has been buried.  The part that connects with people; the part that doesn’t want to be alone.  The part that helped Amara.  The part that loves Cas.  And that’s why Amara brought her back.  

*****************************************************************************************************

Ok, if I think of it this way, I may like Mary a little better now.

BUT ALSO MY BABY:

Cut to Cas.

[THE MAN WALKS OVER TO THE EDGE OF THE CRATER MADE BY THE LANDING AND SEES CASTIEL PULLING HIMSELF OUT.]

MAN 

Holy mother.

[CASTIEL STANDS UP AND LOOKS AROUND]

CASTIEL 

Where am I?

MAN

Uh...Earth?

CASTIEL 

No. How far am I from Lebanon, Kansas?

MAN 

Uh... Th-three hours, maybe. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Who – What are you, man?

[CASTIEL WALKS TOWARDS THE MAN AND TOUCHES HIM ON THE FOREHEAD. THE MAN DROPS TO THE GROUND. CASTIEL LEAVES HIM THERE AS HE DRIVES OFF IN THE TRUCK]

***I spy a Season 11 random parallel

And Cas says, “Earth - 

***Also, I often wonder if in his mind’s inner GPS, Cas bases distances on how far he is from Dean. 

In the meantime, Bad Things Are Happening to Sam.

***Toni Bevell, don’t join the British Men of Letters you’re so sexy hahah

Other than noting that this is yet another too oft- repeated Sam, the Victim, Always Gets Tortured scenario, I see no point in recapping these parts.

I will just continue to post Toni Bevell hotness for these portions of the episode. Ok?  Ok.  You’re welcome.

BACK TO THE BUNKER:

I already posted this sweet baby reunion in my final Season 11 analysis/recap, but lets see it again at another angle and from Mary’s perspective CAUSE CLEARLY she has...*thoughts*

Poor Cas had no idea he was about to MEET THE PARENT 

It melts my little heart that Dean uses Cas’s full name to introduce him to people.  Especially members of his family who are trying to kill him.

Anyway, then we get a much longed for gem of typical Cas deadpan:

(*I still miss Casifer a little bit though*)

And then we have 

A MOMENT OF CONNECTION!  

At the SDCC panel, Misha specifically noted that both Mary and Cas are outsiders, so this tracks. 

They head to the garage:

[Exhaling sharply, Mary walks towards Baby. She runs her hand lightly over the car.]

MARY This was John's car. Oh, she's still beautiful.

DEAN Hell, yeah, she is.

MARY Hi, sweetheart. Remember me?

[MARY LEANS DOWN AND LOOKS INTO THE CAR SMILING. SHE STARTS LOOKING AT THE FRONT SEAT BUT HER EYES AND HER THOUGHTS LINGER ON THE BACK SEAT. DEAN LEANS DOWN LOOKING AT THE INTERIOR OF THE CAR WITH PRIDE. DEAN LOOKS AT HIS MOM AND REALIZES SHE’S HAVING VERY SPECIFIC MEMORIES OF TIME IN THE BACK SEAT. DEAN LOOKS AROUND THE CAR, AND LOOKS AT HIS MOM.]

***this is where you truly see that Sam Smith is a genius because she took those directions and put them all into THIS:

And then THIS:

DEAN 

Oh…

[MARY LOOKS UP AT DEAN. DEAN REALIZES HE MIGHT HAVE BEEN CONCEIVED IN THAT CAR, STANDS UP QUICKLY AND LOOKS OVER THE CAR. DEAN SWALLOWS HARD, AND GLANCES AT CASTIEL WHO GIVES HIM A QUIZZICAL LOOK.]

DEAN 

We should go.

***At this time I would like to remind everyone that Cas is also generally in the back seat of this car.  

MOVING ON

Meanwhile-

Back at the bunker, Cas is Continuing to Connect with his boyfriend’s mother:

[EXTERIOR DAY; INDISTINCT CONVERSATIONS AND THE NOISE OF VIDEO GAMES ARE HEARD. THE CAMERA PANS TO MARY WHO’S WATCHING THE SCENE. CASTIEL IS PICKING UP COFFEE.]

CASTIEL 

Thank you.

[CASTIEL TAKES THE COFFEE TO MARY AND SITS DOWN.]

CASTIEL

This must be difficult for you. I remember my first moments on Earth. It was jarring.

MARY 

One word for it. I grew up with Hunters. I've heard of people coming back from the dead before. But to actually do it... after 30 years. A lot's changed.

[MARY LOOKS AROUND.]

MARY A lot.

Cas:

This is usually a look Reserved For Dean, so its interesting Cas is looking at Mary here [they also weirdly joked about Cas hitting on Mary at the SDCC panel and now I'm giggling because if Mary represents the soft part of Dean this all makes PERFECT SENSE).

BONUS

Actual footage of Sam in super hell

The Cas/Mary bonding worked BTW:

[INTERIOR: GREGORY IS SITTING IN FRONT OF HIS DESK WITH CASTIEL, DEAN, AND MARY STANDING BEFORE HIM.]

DEAN 

So, you dug the bullet out of his leg, no questions asked?

GREGORY 

She offered me 100 grand.

MARY 

And you took it?

GREGORY 

Student loans were a bitch, okay?

[ANGRILY CASTIEL STARTS TOWARDS GREGORY.]

DEAN 

Cas! Cas! Cas! Don't hurt him. Not yet.

**Disclosure: I do not accept the “Cass” spelling and take creative license to change it in the script whenever it appears**

GREGORY 

All right, look, she didn't give me her name. When we were done, the driver bailed, I got paid, and then some other chick shows up, and they all drive away.

MARY 

And that's everything you know?

GREGORY 

(insincerely) Yeah. Totally.

****Um, Mom that’s my boyfriend you don’t order him around like tha-

Oh, well, ok then.

***This is important, because Cas doesn’t obey anyone (other than Dean) blindly ever since he invented free will and all that.  Hence Dean’s surprised/impressed look to Mary above.  

Meanwhile:

I recall that I spent most of my first watch of Season 12 gushing over Toni Bevell, so I’m glad to know this won’t be changing.  You’ve been warned.

Next up, Sam is again sex tortured, Cas is a Helpful Boyfriend, and for some reason, Rick Springfield.  

#spn #spn meta #spn analysis #spn recaps #season 12x01 #season 12 #supernatural #destiel #dean cas #spn fandom #toni bevell #sorry this is long af #but not really sorry bc its mainly due to the additional pics of Toni bevell #and you need her in your life #myspnmeta

[aka-indulgence]

This is a birthday present for @bigoltrashpile!! Happy birthday and sorry this was posted late >u<;; here’s a HT!Papyrus/Reader!

The bell has rung and Papyrus is standing by the class doorway, recipe book clutched to his chest, watching all the other students walk by. In the crowd he spots you, standing in the hall and looking through your phone.

His soul thumps, and he takes a deep breath.

“ya promise bro? ya gonna talk to them today?”

“Y… YES, I PROMISE, SANS!”

“heh.. remember, promises are serious stuff. i’m expecting you to come home a bit later than usual.”

Papyrus wasn’t one to expect Sans to get invested in this, or to become his hype man (WHEN IS SANS EVER EXCITED FOR ANYTHING?) but in his own Sansy way, showed that he really wanted him to work with you.

His brother had been teasing him ever since Papyrus told him that he had a human crush… and when he looks back, Papyrus realized that Sans has been teasing even before that. Sans always knew… that stupid!! Smart!! Big brother who knew how to read people’s faces!

Papyrus always saw himself as the matchmaker. Never in a million years he’d guess that his brother was one too.

When Papyrus said aloud that he’d go and ask you out, Sans had been the one to make him commit to it. Kept asking “what’re you gonna do, paps?” until Papyrus had a whole plan laid out.

Yes, he was going to do it today!

He’s… not sure what it is that got him so nervous in the first place. He’s sure in the past, he’d be able to walk up to you without worrying so much. Even now Papyrus wasn’t one to be shy around people.

But…

His bones rattle thinking about you.

And just earlier… he held your hands in class! Of course, he was doing it to guide you because he saw how you almost cut yourself with the knife but… you were there! In front of him! You were so small… so close to him… your back even brushed against him occasionally... And stars, your hands! They were so soft and warm, Papyrus had to stop himself from squealing from how happy he was, pulling back the magic from his cheekbones to focus on helping you cut.

… Even now just remembering it he’s starting to glow red!

NO PAPYRUS, NO! FOCUS ON THE PRESENT!

His crush is right in front of him now!

He takes a deep breath, puffing out his chest, and starts making his way towards you.

----- You walked out of the restroom, scrolling through Tumblr on your phone, generally distracting yourself because while you were ready to go home, your body just… decided it didn’t want to move. And there’s a really interesting story on your phone right now.

But really… what has your mind occupied right now was Papyrus. He… was an odd one. And not because he’s one of the few monster students in your school!

You were fascinated by monsters ever since they broke out of the Underground a few years ago. Of course, the… famine was an awful thing to fall on them and you hoped nothing but their happiness now that they’re free. They deserve only the best after an experience like that, which is one reason why you’re never shy to come up to them to say hi, and you did the same thing with Papyrus!

… Which brings you to why you think he’s a bit odd. Papyrus is a sweet monster, shy and polite, yet loud when he speaks. He’s a tall- very tall- skeleton monster, like if you were to stretch a human skeleton. He looks like a thin stick at a distance, but when you look closer, you can see that his bones were thicker than yours. He had glasses and braces that made him just look adorable, especially with the comfortable clothes he always has on, with the warm colors and how loose they were.

You’ve tried to say hello to him a couple of times, but you found that… around you specifically, he’d tumble over his words, almost like he’s… intimidated by you? You catch him glancing in your direction while in class when the teacher’s talking, always looking away when you’ve noticed him. Sometimes, he’d follow you, looking down at the floor with a serious face like he’s trying to ask you something… but whenever you ask him what he needs, he’d always wave his hands about, and say that it’s nothing.

You’ve seen Papyrus talk with the other students, monsters, and humans, much more comfortably. He’s hardly the shy, lonely kid. But… he always seemed reluctant to talk with you, so you try not to push him.

… But then today, you were able to speak a lot with him.

You were learning how to fillet a fish today. You guessed you weren’t focusing so much, because apparently, you got your knife too close to your hand and… “WAIT HUMAN, BE CAREFUL!”

Papyrus had rushed over to you and grabbed your hands.

He had such a look of concern on his face while he looked you over, as if you were profusely bleeding or something.

“YOU MUST EXERCISE MORE CAUTION HUMAN… DON’T WANT YOU TO LOSE A FINGER!” He’d cheerfully said… and then he offered to help you. When you asked if he was alright with helping you (he had his fish too didn’t he?), you looked over and saw how he was done… having a practically perfect portion of cut fish on his table.

He told you he had experience in deboning, and as Papyrus helped you cut, your knife slicing through the fish like butter with his help… you don’t need further proof to believe that he’s mastered it.

His hands were so much bigger than yours and he was always careful not to squeeze you too hard… refreshing you on knife grips so you won’t hurt yourself… it made you feel special.

When eventually you had ten pieces of fish in front of you and Papyrus let go of your hands, you thanked him for saving you from a cut, and for helping you. You finished faster than you thought, even with that little hiccup in the beginning, more than half the class were still cutting their fish.

Papyrus was silent for a while, before it seemed like… his sockets(???) got smaller, and a deep blush settled over his cheekbones. Like he just realized what happened.

“O-OH…. I’M SORRY HUMAN, I DIDN’T LET YOU DO THAT ON YOUR OWN DID I? OH, I’M… I DIDN’T MEAN TO…”

“Oh no it’s ok! You helped me a lot, thanks.”

“...”

Then Papyrus smiled.

“ANY TIME HUMAN. IT WAS MY PLEASURE.”

… You couldn’t stop thinking about how cute you think he looks.

…

You shake your head off your thoughts of him. You look up from your phone, and you see him there in the doorway, your eyes meeting. You were expecting him to break eye contact but… he holds it for a while before he looks at the floor.

You guess… maybe he’s still a bit shy?

You give him a little wave anyway, and start walking towards the entrance fo your school… hoping you’d be able to talk with him more. He has that look like he wants to say something to you, but you won’t bug him for it. You see him out of the corner of your eye, walking to the entrance too…

Only this time, he speaks to you.

“H… HELLO HUMAN! I WANTED TO SPEAK TO YOU!”

You smile even before you turn around.

“Hey!”

“S-SO! …. I UM... IT’S ME, THE ONE WHO HELPED YOU WITH THE FISH EARLIER!” Papyrus is beaming, but you can see his grin’s a little too strained, nervous.

You giggle. “Yes, I know who you are, Papyrus.”

He was in the middle of opening his mouth but he suddenly stops at that. “WAIT… YOU REMEMBER MY NAME?”

You actually snort at that. “Pff… what kind of question is that? Of course I remember you. It’s kinda hard to forget you, yknow?”

Papyrus made a small happy ‘NYEH!’ at that before he regained his composure. “WHY YES, OF COURSE! EVERYONE REMEMBERS THE GREAT PAPYRUS, NYEH HEH! SEE HUMAN, I STAND HERE BEFORE YOU BECAUSE, I UM. I WANTED TO ASK IF YOU’D LIKE TO WALK HOME TOGETHER TODAY! IF YOU UH… WALK HOME, HMM…”

He taps his chin.

“WELL I HAVE A CAR AND, I THINK I SAW YOU DRIVING HOME WITH A CAR TOO! I JUST UM… IF NOT WALKING HOME TOGETHER, WOULD YOU LIKE TO GO SOMEWHERE WITH ME? I QUITE… ENJOYED OUR LITTLE TALK…” Papyrus squints (how does a skeleton do that?) “... WHAT I MEAN TO SAY IS, I’D LIKE TO GET TO KNOW YOU BETTER, AND I BELIEVE A LITTLE TRAVELING AND PERHAPS A VISIT TO SOME OF THE LOCAL SHOPS WOULD BE AN ENJOYABLE THING TO DO! THAT IS. IF YOU’D LIKE…?”

Papyrus looks extra nervous now, his smile falling a bit as it seems like a thousand thoughts were crossing through his sockets before he shook his skull and crinkled his sockets.

Hahah… you wish you could tell him you weren’t anyone to be intimidated by, but that might put him in the spot! You give Papyrus an encouraging smile.

“Sure!”

“... SURE?”

“Yeah! That sounds like fun! Take me wherever.”

Maybe Papyrus couldn’t see it, but you were barely holding in your excitement that the mysterious shy skeleton from class is finally talking to you! You watch as Papyrus’ expression goes from completely blank… to having sparkly eyes(?).

He jumps and makes a little whoop in the air, before he quickly stifles himself with his phalanges, which… isn’t the most effective, probably.

“DO… SHOPS BY THE LAKE SOUND GOOD TO YOU?”

“Yeah!”

The both of you start walking towards the entrance. And when you see Papyrus hesitate to take your hand, you take it for him.

He doesn’t let go.

… It’s far from your last outing with Papyrus.

#ht!papyrusxreader #i hope this is a good read ;w; #i showed them earlier but!! i wanted to post heee

[byima]

California Dreaming pt 4

I shared this on AO3 half a month ago and I’m just getting around to cross posting for the tumblr folks and you can read the full story here.

Lunch was a boisterous event. They ate at, or commandeered depending on who was asked, an Italian restaurant in the city of Berkeley. Everyone was there; Frank, Hazel, Nico, Grover, Silena, Beckendorf, Travis, Connor, Katie, Rachel, Jason, Piper, and Leo. Remi was there too, and so was Annabeth’s dad and her stepmom and half-brothers, who were in town because of her own commencement which had been the day before, and so was Frank’s grandmother. The restaurant was cozy, it smelt heavenly; 70’s and 80’s music buzzed through the speakers, friendly staff flitted between tables. Their group was two tables strong, too loud, too rowdy and it was one of few times the whole commencement weekend that Annabeth felt overwhelmed but energized by that feeling, rather than drained.

“No Charlie, this is the perfect time! We can rent a van–”

“Yup, just picture it man, tearing down the roads, stopping wherever we want, camping out during the nights–”

Silena grimaced, and Charles laughed at her expression. She and Travis had been trying to convince Charles and Katie to take a west coast road trip: from northern California to Nevada, then Utah, then Arizona and then down to southern California.

“I’ll be down, if we do this without a single hotel stay.” From Charles. Who was next to Paul, who was next to Sally, who was across from Percy.

“Two hotel stays.” From Silena, next to Charles. She was in full negotiation mode.

Estelle, on Sally’s other side, ducked under the table to retrieve the errant crayon she’d been using to color her kid’s menu. Through the aged speakers, Dexys Midnight Runners chorused, ‘Too-ra loo-ra too-ra loo-rye-ayyyyyyy,’ and the space hummed with a spicy-herb/heavy-sauce fragrance and music and laughter and liveliness.

“Nah Silena, if we’re doing this, we’re doing this for real.” From Travis, a few seats to Percy’s right.

Grover, on Percy’s direct right, finally found the image on his mostly unused, worse-for-wear Nokia brick of a phone. He held up the battered screen to Percy’s face. “This is it. See the name on that wrapper? I need to find this place and try their samosas–”

“Explain to me how staying in a hotel would make this ‘not real’ Travis.”

He raised his slice of buttered bread to his mouth. “I’m just talking about getting the most experiential of experiences–”

“And I’m talking about having semi-regular shower access–” Silena leaned towards the Stoll brother sitting across from her to emphasize her point.

“And apparently the locals have nicknamed the San Francisco fog Karl.” A fun fact from Paul.

“Is that so?” Piper encouraged him with a broad grin.

She got an under the table kick from Annabeth for that one.

At the other table, Frank’s grandmother held her new smartphone for Leo to see.

“Don’t do it for me, show me how so I can do it myself.”

“Er, sorry, Grandma Zhang you just- you have to… here-”

“No, I said show me, and now you’ve done something else, Valdez!”

“I know, but I’m trying to show you how to go back without a back button,” Leo ran an agitated hand through his curls.

Travis leaned forward too, matching Silena’s energy, bitten bread slice brandished. “You’re weak. And I’ve outgrown you.”

Charles was laughing again. Hard. Like struggling to breathe belly laughing.

“Why is Beckendorf having a conniption?” Piper’s voice carried from the other end of the table.

Katie answered. “Travis is back to quoting The Incredible’s.”

Connor was losing it, too. “My man Beckendorf has caught every single one of them.”

“Name a better Disney movie–”

“I’ve already named one. Mulan. And– Travis, I’m serious, we’ll watch it tonight and it'll shut you right up-” 

“Katie, Katie, Katie…” Travis shook his head in pity. “You can’t admit defeat, huh? I saw you last night, trying to act like you weren’t hyped during the family fight scenes-”

Silena smacked her hand impatiently on the table. “Travis, can you, for just one moment, stay with me? You were supposed to be on my side.” 

“And I was. I am.” He leveled an accusatory finger at her face. “But you’re a wuss if you can’t survive one road trip without hotel amenities.”

“You’re full of shit, Trav.” Back to Katie, sitting between Grover and Travis.

There was a minor uproar.

“Hey hey hey, watch your mouth young lady there are children present–”

“Don’t forget the children–” 

Connor and Travis. They are the uproar.

“Percy says that word a lot. So, I know it’s a bad word.” Estelle looked at her brother, then Connor, as she sold the former out.

There were a couple “oooo’s” from the friends gathered and Percy shook his head at the betrayal, hand on his chest because, alas, he’s Caesar, and Brutus has two pigtails and missing teeth.

Estelle, loving the reaction of the masses and her moment in the spotlight, added, “So does my mom.”

The entire table erupted in a chorus of “OOOOOOOO’S” and Paul looked at Sally, a little baffled and overwhelmed and amused because how else could he feel in such a setting?

“Sally Jackson, patron saint of motherhood–”

“Despite the utter disappointment that is her first born–”

“You’ve been called out, ma’am, how do you respond?”

Sally covered Estelle’s ears. “Fuck off. All of you.” A thespian response from the “saint” herself. 

The large party collectively lost it, roaring laughter carried through the restaurant, other patrons looked around to spot the source of the ruckus.

“Ladies and gentlemen, Sally Jackson-Blofis–”

“She’s quick, she’s gritty, and she’s straight from New York City–”

“I think that’s us.” Grover’s eyes followed his nose, which picked up on the savory scent of freshly prepared food being brought near to them. A united cheer drew attention, once again, to the celebrating group. 

 “You guys are gonna get us kicked out before we can even take a bite.” Frank made accidental eye contact with a frowning restaurant-goer.

Waitstaff arrived at their tables with black trays laden with the steaming, heavenly smelling bounty.

The young woman who’d taken their orders earlier gestured to the guy accompanying her.

“Alright everyone, this is Gio, he’s gonna take over for me since my shift is ending.” There were some noises of disappointment and she playfully hushed the table of spirited demigods. She set a plate of spaghetti with meatballs in front of Estelle and a baked chicken parmesan dish in front of Sally, gently warning the child that her plate would be hot.

Gio waved hello before he started distributing ordered dish to orderer. “Nani told me we have some graduates here today…”

 -----

“So Italians will actually eat it like… this.” Nico demonstrated to Jason.

“Like this?”

“Yeah…”

“Really?”

“Nah, I’m just fucking with you.”

 Percy nodded at Annabeth’s dish. “How is it?”

“It’s so good. You wanna try?”

Annabeth was already twirling her fork into the pasta, and she speared a piece of shrimp on the end before raising the bite to Percy’s waiting mouth. His eyes rolled back and he made a low noise as he slowly chewed.

Her eyes danced. “I don’t think it was that good.”

He shook his head in disagreement. “Lemme have some of yours. And you can have some of my pizza.”

“I don’t want your pizza.”

“You do. This is what they mean when they talk about the best of both worlds.” Percy tried forking a portion of her food from her full plate to his and she stopped him, doing it herself before he made a mess of both of them with his clumsy portioning.

“And then I give you some of mine…”

Annabeth felt a hand on her shoulder and she turned from watching Percy lower a slice of his pizza (which was actually heavy with cheese and red sauce and phenomenal tasting) to look at her dad who was seated behind her at the table running parallel to theirs.

“How does it feel to be finally done? Both of you, graduated and diploma’d.”

Dr. Chase had been on cloud nine the whole weekend. His daughter had graduated from the best public university in the country. What else would you expect from the academia-loving dad? But the last five years had been pivotal for their relationship, too. When Annabeth looked at her father, really looked at him, she saw the sadness edging his expression. Because he knew, as she closed this chapter of her life, she would begin another, and he would lose her to the east coast. So she’s been gentle with him, and maybe with herself too this weekend.

“I took my last final on Friday, so it doesn’t feel real yet.” 

She lowered her fork and looked to Percy for his response to see him shaking his head.

“Nah. I’ve been checked out for weeks now. Barely held on till the end.”

“He’s lying, dad. Percy’s been emotional all week.”

“I’m sorry to have missed the ceremony at your school.”

Percy had just taken a bite of his pizza and his eyes went wide when he realized Frederick was waiting for a reply from him.

Annabeth responded on his behalf. “Trust me, Dad. His ceremony was just like any other graduation ceremony. Too much sun, a boring speaker, and two seconds to cheer for the person you care about.”

“Dude, Annabeth gets it.” This was from Bobby, who was sitting across from his father. “Why did they have to do two graduations for you?”

“One was for everybody, which was like, over 6,000 people. And then the other was specifically for my department.”

It was a little hard to hear them over the clinking of silverware against ceramic dishes and Rachel and Remi’s loud debate over traditional versus digital art, so Annabeth turned in her chair to face her family.

“Nobody needs to come to our high school graduation if it's gonna be this much of a drag.” Matthew said this with resolve.

“I think you’ll feel differently about things when the time comes.” From her stepmom, Helen.

“This is how graduations and commencements work.” Frederick Chase picked up his fork to resume eating his pesto pasta dish. “You spend years working hard, pushing through to the finish, shouldering through challenges and all of life’s obstacles, and then the day comes–”

“Oooooo… And then the day comes…”

“Dun dun DUUUNN! Dad, you make it sound so dramatic.” Matthew and Bobby snickered.

“It is dramatic.” He waved his fork like a baton. “When you’re graduating, you are the star of the moment, the center of the universe, just temporarily, and all of us will do our best to show up for you in the biggest way we can.” His brown eyes twinkled and Annabeth felt herself blushing at the warmth focused on her. “We all will bear through ceremony after ceremony if that means we get to celebrate your accomplishment.”

Annabeth thought about the hug her dad had wrapped her in yesterday morning, long and tight, and the way that squeeze said a million things other than ‘congratulations.’ And Sally in the car earlier today… 

“Trust me guys, you don’t wanna be the person with no family at your graduation.” Piper turned from her conversation with Connor to give her two-cents.

“You were that person?”

“Yup. Eighth grade promotion. Me and a disgruntled nanny. As if junior high wasn’t bad enough.”

“Gonna have to agree with McLean here,” Rachel chimed in.

“Not to be the girl who complains about having a big family–”

“I’m betting you’re about to be that girl who complains about having a big family–”

“–but there’s nothing like having your aunt screaming on the phone in the middle of your high school graduation, simultaneously cursing out and giving parking directions to your tardy cousin.” Remi offered with a shrug.

Rachel and Remi argued the pros and cons of large heavily involved families, versus small, absentee ones. Frank coaxed his grandmother into trying the “too expensive” Italian cuisine. Travis and Katie were trying to out-embarrass each other with old camp stories. There were a million conversations happening at once.

“Jason, can I get the parmesan?”

“I feel like you have room for one more meatball in your mouth, kiddo-”

“Connor, I’m starting to regret allowing you next to my daughter.”

Sally held a napkin before Estelle’s mouth and the girl reluctantly ejected three soggy meatballs.

“So we pretty much knew Hazel was lactose intolerant at that point-”

“Severely lactose intolerant-”

And a million memories, so many silly, significant snapshots; Annabeth found herself wishing she hadn’t left Percy’s camera under the driver's seat of the rental.

“I’m never doing anything or going anywhere with you that has anything to do with Italy.”

“So we’re doing it?! This road trip is happening?”

“Does anyone need some more water here?”

“Lemme have some of your Bolognese-”

Annabeth startled. She’d been playing with the simple pendant that hung just below her collarbones when she felt Percy’s hand touch the crease of her elbow.

He had red sauce on his chin. And food crumbs on his upper lip. And all he did was lower their joined hands beneath the table and ask.

“What's going on in there?”

She rubbed her thumb into the first knuckle of his middle finger, gray eyes still intently consuming the surrounding scene; then her eyes met his and she saw understanding.

She tried explaining anyway, “I don’t want to forget… I want to- to be in this moment, you know? Or… I just- I wish I could-”

She pressed her lips shut and smiled ruefully, a little embarrassed by her abysmal attempt at the English language. 

“Yeah. Same.” He squeezed her hand. “Yeah.”

 ------

They were outside. In front of the antique looking benches that flanked the restaurant’s double door entryway. Annabeth was going to stay in Berkeley with her family for the rest of the afternoon and Percy would head back to New Rome with his family. For now, they stood together, waiting for Matthew and Bobby who were in the restroom, preventing the Chase’s departure.

Annabeth planted her hands on her lower back and stretched her spine. “You’re very… confident today.”

“Am I?”

“Mmhm.” She leaned closer to him. “It’s like you’re… aware that people are watching. All day, all of these eyes have been on you and you’ve been very okay with it.” Even now, she noticed, in his slacks and dress shoes and his light blue short sleeve button up, he was handsome, cleaned up and groomed and plain-as-day attractive and definitely drawing attention standing as they were, in view of all the passer-byers. Yet he was comfortable. Confident.

He shrugged, because he didn’t know how else to react to her keen observation. She read him so intimately.

She was still reading him, and she could see traces of that self consciousness that had been missing all day creep into his body language.

“Did I kill your mojo?”

If he’d been confident all day, then she’d been radiant all weekend. They’d spent the week, Monday through Friday, stressed, all over the place, sleeping odd hours and meeting up to study or cry (the tears were from Annabeth, Percy was a zombie at that point) just trying to get through finals week so they could actually graduate. And then the weekend had come and family had arrived and there were graduation ceremonies and baccalaureates and dinners with parents and dress shoes and dresses that made Percy want to carry Annabeth off to a beach and fucking frolic in the fucking sand. But he couldn’t, there wasn’t any time to frolic or marvel or drink to the last five years of their lives. So they bounced from ceremony to ceremony. And she’d been absolutely radiant throughout, walking across the stage during her graduation Saturday morning, receiving special honors from her department. Running toward him this Sunday morning, wrapping herself around him and confirming that he had in fact done this, he was in fact finished with school. He’s so grateful for her. In awe of her. He couldn’t imagine doing this without her. It was incredible to do this with her. She pierced his heart like a sweet note of his favorite song and he felt her in his bones. There was so much going on, and it was good, all of it was so good, and here she was, here he was, and he missed her. Annabeth Chase, mojo murderer.

“Yes.” He cupped her face and kissed her quickly, she didn't even have time to react. “No. Now I’m overthinking, like, everything though. Bobby is coming out.” He jerked his chin at something behind her. “I think your fam is ready to leave.”

She glanced back at them with a frown. “That was supposed to be a compliment, Jackson.”

“Your dad is looking at me like he wants to say something.” Percy insistently tugged her arm and turned her around. “Please go with them before he does.”

She pulled her arm free and walked backwards, pointing at him for emphasis as the space between them grows.

“Keep the confidence, okay? I’ll see you at dinner?”

He pointed back at her. "I'll see you at dinner."

#mypjofic #percy jackon and the olympians #percy and annabeth #percabeth #california dreaming #trying to motivate to myself to finish the last part #by looking at the most recent chapter #one more and done

[fczco]

arrogant son of a bitch, JJ Maybank

masterlist in bio

a.n: i wrote this around april ?? i don't really know, but it deleted when i deactivated and im posting it again, if you feel it familiar that's probably why :) english is not my first language so i apologise in advance for any mistake.

words count: 1,8k

warnings: cursing ?? other than that idk

(gif not mine if it's yours please tell me so i can give you credits)

The alarm on your phone went off letting you know it was time to get up and help your mum at work. After getting dressed with a loose lavender dress and a pair of sneakers you exited your room and poured yourself a cup of coffee just to afterwards cross the little door besides the fridge and get into the family clothing store and finding your mum placing some shirts near the building entrance.

- "Hi" you mouthed taking a sip of the drink while walking towards the desk.

- "Good morning sweetheart" she smiled without stopping doing what she was doing "how did you sleep" this time she quickly glanced at you.

- "Like an angel" you answer and she giggled.

The morning went by slow, even though you were one of the few countable with one hand clothing stores in the island, the beginning of summer was almost a month ago and most of the residents had already bought their clothes for this season.

You looked at the time on your phone. It was half past ten in the morning when one of your friends, who you were starting to find kinda attractive as the summer went by, entered the store with a big smile on his face.

- "JJ!" your mum happily said as she walked towards him and hugged him, she loved JJ, "it's been so long since the last time I've seen you around!" she let go of him and he came closer to the desk where you were sitting.

- "it really has" he said while looking at you and smiling.

- "what brings you here?" you asked with your hand placed on your chin as support.

- "Well, John B had this amazing idea of a pic-nic at the beach, so i came over to see if your mum would be gentle enough to let us borrow you for the rest of the day?" he said and you both turned your heads towards her, "i promise to bring her myself back here before ten p.m all in one piece" she kept looking at you two with her eyes furrowed, "pleeaasee i'm begging you" your mum laughed at JJ's words.

- "i want her back by nine p.m" your best friend looked at you and you just grinned at him.

- "nine thirty?" JJ asked with his eyes wide opened waiting for a yes as an answer.

- "fine, nine thirty it is" your mum gave in and he yelled a 'woohoo' while throwing his hands on the hair and running to where your mum was to give her a kiss in the cheek.

- "thank you so much" he said to her.

- "yes yes whatever, go inside and look for something to eat and share with everyone else" you smiled at her and entered the house with JJ following you behind.

You went to your room and put on a yellow bikini, took the backpack you usually used and threw a towel and your suncream inside of it. JJ helped you prepare some sandwiches and then walked through the store to say bye to your mum and go out to the street.

He approached his bike and you followed him as he handed you a helmet.

After a short ride you two arrived at John's B house.

- "You're not as afraid of the bike as you were before" JJ said to you while he took his helmet out.

- "i think so, i've got used to it" he smiled to you and together walked to the beach were your friends were, Kiara was laying down on the sand with Pope and John B was coming out of the water.

- "Y/N" your girl friend ran to you with open arms to hug you since you hadn't seen each other in like three days and you were inseparable.

- "I've missed you kie" you giggled as you hugged her too.

A few hours had gone by and now you were sitting on the sand next to your best friend while eating the sandwiches you and JJ had prepare before and watching the boys surf.

- "where's Sarah?" you asked, she wasn't there when you arrived but thought she might go later, she didn't.

- "she couldn't come today, something about a trip with her father i think, JB didn't say too much" Kiara said before eating the last portion of her sandwich.

You smiled at JJ as you saw how he was nailing one of the waves.

- "what's up with you two" your friend asked and looked at you.

- "what do you mean" you stopped looking at the boy you had a crush on to look back at Kie.

- "You perfectly know what i'm talking about Y/N, these past three days we barely saw JJ and you because you were hanging out together, this morning he was all excited about going to your house so he could, and i exactly repeat 'ask your mum in person' if you could come here, which is completely silly cause we both know she would never say no" you laughed at that last part.

- "we're just amazing friends Kie, that's it" you said turning your head towards JJ again, he was looking at you two too and waved with his right hand.

- "friends don't look at other friend's the way you look at each other" she smiled and tried to make you look at her, thing she did, "you like him, don't you" you could not help the little smile in your face as you scrunched your nose, "you do! oh my god you really do!" you faced her, "you have to tell him, right now!" Kiara grabbed your face between your hands.

- "you know i can't there's a specific rule about that" you tried to speak as your friend did not let go of your face.

- "oh come on! that rule is the most stupid thing i've ever heard!" you blanked your eyes at her and she finally let go of you.

- "even if that rule didn't exist i'm pretty sure he doesn't feel the same"

- "who doesn't feel the same about what Y/N?" JJ asked as he walked towards you two and sat down, you looked at him as he took your towel out of your backpack and used it to dry his face, "because if it is me about feeling completely mesmerized about how beautiful you are i have to say that you're wrong" he smiled at you.

- "you arrogant son of a bitch!" you yelled at him while laughing. Kiara looked at you and winked her left eye before getting up and go running to the water.

- "so? what is it? my eyes?" he opened his eyes wide open "my beautiful and soft hair?" he ran his hand through his hair, you just kept looking at him play silly "or is it my abs?" he slapped his belly.

- "oh shut up!" you rolled your eyes at him and he just laughed at you.

- "no, seriously i want to know" you stopped looking at him and laid down on the sand, JJ copied your actions "ok, so if you're not gonna tell me what you like about me, i'm going to tell what i like about you" he turned over, now his back was facing the setting sun.

- "COOOME OOON, DON'T DO THIS TO ME, KIARA COME BACK PLEASE" you screamed as you covered your face with your hands.

- "sshhh, can you please not be dramatic for once in your life?" you still had your face covered but you could feel JJ gaze on it, "first of all you're the most careful person i've ever met, you always make sure everyone is ok and having a great time, you have amazing taste in music, your hair smells so good-"

- "oh my god have you stopped yet?" you laughed a little.

- "almost, you're an amazing cooker, you've the most amazing mum of all, i'm pretty sure there's no woman as beautiful as you are-"

- "finished?" your hands still on your face.

- "and one more thing" he lifted up one of his fingers in the air.

- "thank god" you took your hands of your face and looked at JJ who was smiling at you.

- "the Wi-Fi signal in your house is" he pecked his lips with his hand which made you burst on laughing and he too, "now, tell me what are the things you like about me".

- "i like" you kept looking at him with a frown on your face to make it seem as if you were thinking, "i like your name" you teased him.

- "my name? really?" you nodded, "i say all these beautiful things about you and that's what i get back?" you nodded again with a little grin on your lips, "you're gonna pay for this woman".

He quickly got up, grabbed you and positioned you over his shoulder as he started running towards the ocean, your friends were watching the scene.

- "JJ DON'T PUT ME DOWN THE WATER IS FREEZING" you yelled while 'punching' his back.

- "and what you gonna do if i do put you down?"

- "i'll kick your ass you pretty boy" you stopped punching his back.

- "i'd actually like to see that" instantly he jumped on the water with you still on his arms.

You two came out of the water facing each other. JJ hugged you when he saw that you were shivering.

- "now tell me, do you like eyes?" you nodded, "and my hair?" you kept nodding because you were so cold that talking was hard, "and what about my abs" you nodded again and he smiled and looked at you without breaking the embrace.

- "your Wi-Fi is pretty shitty tho" you said between shivers, he laughed and finally kissed you, JB and Pope were yelling lots of 'woohoo' and Kiara screamed 'FINALLY YOU BITCHES I HATE YOU' to which JJ and you smiled through the kiss.

The rest of the evening went fast, you ate some cookies Kiara had made and drank a little bit of beer. And at nine twenty five JJ and you said goodbye to your amazing friends and he took you to your house, arriving exactly at nine thirty and in one piece as he had promised your mum that morning, but he didn't leave for another ten minutes you spend just making out outside.

- "I knew i had heard JJ's bi-" your mum came out of the store while you two were still kissing and fast pulled away "oh, ok, i'll go back inside, food's ready by the way" she turned back and entered the store again.

JJ and you started crazily laughing and he pressed his forehead against yours.

- "i'll see you tomorrow?" he asked looking into your eyes.

- "of course you will pretty boy" you gave him a little peck on the lips and entered the store while he watched your every move and smiled.

#obx jj #jj x y/n #jj maybank #jj outer banks #jj imagine #jj obx #jj one shot #obx fanfiction #obx x reader

[jiminieloved]

Lol, welp, since your submission page does say you’re accepting people venting their opinion about something, and other anons you’re getting today have made this topical, I’m going to submit a bit of a frustrated opinion piece to you here- though I totally understand if you don’t want to post it if you think others might take it the wrong way and feel like it’s inciting drama or something. 

So bit of a hot take here, but I hold the opinion that Jikookers who insist that the post SY Final emails from TKers/hetshippers about stopping Jikook’s ‘gay performances’ worked, and that Jikook has ‘barely breathed’ and stopped interacting in public since then specifically because Big Hit won’t ‘let’ them because of those complaints, because they’re now trying to suppress their relationship and please Taekookers, are almost as frustrating as the crowd that starts weeping about how Jikook broke up every single time we go a week without a new moment at this point- it’s just two different forms of baseless hysteria grounded in insecurity. There’s a reason TKers have been widely mocked for coming up with conspiracy theories about how BH has turned TK into a tragic, forbidden love that is forced to stay apart, and I just hate seeing so many of us turn around and do the exact same thing the second we miss the boys for a minute. Now, allow to me explain WHY I think this idea is so silly, if I may

I guarantee that Big Hit gets complaints and demands about EVERYTHING related to the boys, that’s just the nature of overseeing literally the biggest band in the world- and yet people truly believe that of all the things they hear about, they caved to the emailed demands of what was most likely not even actually a full 100 people among BTS’s 1mil+ person fan base? You’re giving what was most likely a double digit amount of TKers (whenever anyone tries to bust out a tweet of people complaining about all the Jikook interactions that night that has triple digit likes, as if that’s proof that hundreds upon HUNDREDS of people were emailing Big Hit, I have to roll my eyes; one, a lot of that those likes probably come from people who have multiple accounts, and two, there’s way less energy involved with hitting like on a tweet than composing and sending an email-I would bet you anything that the vast majority of people who did the former never actually followed through with the latter. Not to mention that even if it actually had been a few hundred, which it almost definitely wasn’t, that’s STILL a completely insignificant portion of BTS’s fanbase) entirely too much credit if you think BH started suddenly declaring how and when JM and JK are allowed to interact just because of them; frankly, BH likely gets WAY more nutso emails from people about dumb things like wanting Tae publicly flogged for vaping or wanting JK kicked out of the group for having tattoos than they ever have about shipping matters- I’d be shocked if this particular issue was even a blip on the radar, or ever went beyond the administrative assistant in charge of sorting through fan emails laughing to themself as they deleted the nonsense.

But hey, let’s say the emails DID make it to the higher-ups at Big Hit and they WERE aware of them- thinking they started keeping Jikook apart because of them requires assuming BH places more weight into a few pressed emails than they do the entire sold out stadium being filled with the sound of hysterical, supportive, happy screaming every time Jikook were acting boo’d up that night, and, uh… WHY would you assume that, lol? Even IF BigHit is hypersensitive to how Army responds to specific ships, which I honestly doubt, I promise you any company would care more about the real-time reaction of a 60000 person true random sampling of the band’s fan base than a comparatively TINY amount of emails or tweets that, for all they know, are just being spammed by the same five people with an agenda across different accounts, and that real-time reaction to Jikook from 60000 random fans was extremely positive. Not to mention how Jikook is more popular than Taekook with both K-Army and J-Army, and it’s only I-Army that Taekook has the edge with; why does anyone think Big Hit cares more about a shipping subset of their third biggest market than a shipping subset of their first two biggest markets, if they’re going to care about shipping at all?

Then there’s the issue where I also think it’s kind of insulting to Jimin and Jungkook to suggest they would have even stood for being forcibly distanced to please some pissy Taekook fans, TBH. I’m not saying they get to live their lives as openly as they want 100% of the time, obviously as Idols there are things they make big concessions about, but Jungkook is a man who has been acknowledging since 2014 that a lot of their fans would be very upset with him if he ever got a tattoo, and who then still proceeded to get 20+ of them because that’s what HE wanted, Jimin is a man who saw fans complaining his shirt was too revealing and he should stop wearing it and proceeded to wear that shirt as often as possible throughout the next few weeks to make a point- you think they’d put up a fight like that for tattoos and clothes, but not for the person that we as Jikookers are assuming is their beloved partner? That’s not even getting into Jungkook being so vocal and so brave with gestures like GCF Tokyo and Rose Bowl; I would bet you anything that same man would not sit there quietly and nod along if an executive tried to order him to stop being seen with Jimin and start playing up his friendship with Taehyung for the camera more often, all just so they could please some obnoxious American teenagers. 

And finally, and what might be the biggest point to me- the ‘Jikook has been dead since then!’ and ‘Something is clearly off between them since then!’ narratives are SO exaggerated by Jikookers anyway, ones who have lost all perspective about how they haven’t been in public much since November, and they both barely use social media anymore, so ALL content from them drops off dramatically when there’s no tour, no promotions, and no appearances happening. Shippers keep complaining that we’ve had barely any new content in 2020, it’s all been stuff that was filmed in 2019 and just released now, waaah, and I’m just like ‘…uh, yeah, and that’s the case for literally every ship involving Jimin or Jungkook, because the three weeks of album promotion we got are basically all either of them have been seen for this year.’ If they were both constantly around and acting affectionate with other members while visibly icing only each other out, then maybe I could get the conspiracy theories, but I genuinely can’t recall any significant interactions either of them have had with other members outside of the clearly planned and scheduled V-Lives- not that this means the interactions in said V-lives weren’t genuine and cute, for the record! But it’s not like Jungkook was just hanging out at Tae’s apartment and they spontaneously decided to go live- Big Hit clearly had these particular lives mapped out and they’ve essentially been part of the boys’ current work schedule. They’ve both made themselves scarce, period, you can’t get ‘fed’ by people who just straight up aren’t making public appearances or using their social media accounts- and when we HAVE seen them, like in the last two OT7 lives, they’ve very much seemed like their normal selves and have been right by each other’s side, per usual. Also, when you look back on years in your mind as a compilation of significant moments, it makes you forget that even in 2018 and 2019, it wasn’t uncommon to go weeks or months between content; your brain just selectively filters out the time in-between that you spent waiting to remember only the good stuff we got those years, and it makes it feel like it was a constant flood of moments happening all at once; you remember ALL of 2018 and 2019 as their respective best dozen moments, forgetting that there was plenty of time in between even then, and that Jikookers frequently threw embarrassing fits about how they had clearly broken up any time their ‘feeding schedule’ was off for a few weeks even then.

And I mean, the face smushing pictures that have already become a Jikook fandom all time favorite moment were post SYF, the chest groping performance of Home was post SYF, them lovingly smiling while singing The Earth Traveler directly to each other and the behind the scenes clip of them looking just as smitten during the recording was post SYF, the extremely flirty and domestic New Year’s VLive that had Jikook fandom dying was post SYF, the video of them flirting about how long they’ve been a unit was post SYF (not to mention how Big Hit deciding to give them a photobook subunit in the first place, or deciding to include that flirty footage in the album release event stream, were both choices made post SYF), the big Jikook feast that was Winter Package was post SYF (and again, BH didn’t HAVE to include all that Jikook footage, and they DEFINITELY didn’t have to write the very shippy captions that one had- they chose to), Jimin holding Jungkook’s arm in the airport was post SYF, them holding hands while walking off stage at the Japan muster was post SYF, Jungkook calling Jimin cute and sexy during the album release and all of their flirting across the table and hugging and touchiness that same night was post SYF, the V-Live where Jimin was being very affectionate with Jungkook and there was that adorable minute long sequence where you could tell how badly they were fighting the instinct to hold hands was post SYF, Jungkook publicly and proudly losing his mind over Jimin the Black Swan reaction video was post SYF, them choosing to let us see them happily riding home together was post SYF, Jungkook stopping dead in his tracks and abandoning the routine to just lovingly stare at Jimin for two minutes straight during Carpool Karaoke was post SYF, the cuddling and spooning during recent Run BTS episodes was filmed prior to then, but BH’s decision to include the footage and post the photo was post SYF, same with all the season’s greeting Jikook footage, same with BH deciding to make the 5th Muster DVD an all out Jikook holy grail, same with BH having the Speak Yourself Japan behind-the-scenes footage be more Jikook than anything else. If that’s Jikook after supposedly being ordered to stay away from each other or to at least ‘tone down the gay’, and if Big Hit’s idea of pulling back on Jikook means still having the behind the scenes footage on the next 4 paid content DVD releases be LOADED with Jikook and basically revolve around their interactions, then call me crazy, but I think things are gonna be okay

#submission #yesssssssss #pls get notes this is everythibng i've ever wanted to say in one post #thank u #jikook #jikook discourse

[romionestinyballoflight]

Okay fellow Romione shippers, I have something I need to get off of my chest. A rant, if you will.

Just a quick disclaimer, this post is going to be long and I’m going to be unleashing thoughts and feelings I’ve had built up for six years now, so I’m going to insert a handy dandy Read More here for those who are not interested in seeing six years worth of pent up thoughts and feelings.

For those of you still with me, let’s jump into this.

Since I’ve been making strict Romione posts lately, I’ve obviously been thinking about the dynamic of their relationship and why they do work as a couple and why they definitely should’ve been endgame. But I’ve also been thinking about people who argue against Romione, specifically those who ship Harmione and Dramione.

This is something I’ve touched on before, but when I first became a Potterhead I was a Harmione shipper. Mainly because I was only ten or eleven when I first started the books, and I didn’t understand how adult relationships actually work. I didn’t fully understand that people are going to get heated with each other, people are going to argue, and there is nothing wrong with that. So, knowing that, I saw how Ron and Hermione interacted at first glance, thought it was wrong, and my late elementary/early middle school brain wanted Hermione with Harry. It also had to do with the fact that I saw a lot of myself in Hermione, and at the time, I would’ve crushed on someone like Harry over someone like Ron (I still see a lot of myself in Hermione, and as I’ve grown up I’ve realized I actually would fall for someone like Ron and would actually need someone like Ron, but more on that later). It’s also not hard to ship the main guy with the main girl, because that’s a trope a lot of authors use. So believe me, I understand the appeal of the Harmione relationship.

However, the same can’t be said about the Dramione ship. Don’t get me wrong, I don’t think there’s anything inherently wrong with the good girl/bad boy relationship and I can even kind of see the appeal of it. But I’m also very leery about it because there’s a fine line between respectful good girl/bad boy relationships and disrespectful good girl/bad boy relationships, and it’s very easy to cross that line. With the Dramione ship, it goes beyond just crossing the line. Granted, Draco Malfoy was raised in a hateful environment, but this is also someone who literally wished death on Hermione just because she was of different magic blood status. Dramione shippers can say all they want that Draco didn’t know how to manage his feelings and had to maintain his status quo or whatever by openly bullying Hermione and throwing racial slurs at Hermione and literally wanting Hermione dead and it’s the classic “he’s bullying her, so that means he likes her!”, but wishing death on someone is not something anyone should be saying in any kind of context and it’s definitely not something I would say about anyone I had feelings for, so I’ll never excuse that alone. That one example of wishing Hermione was dead is my number one argument against Dramione every time I argue with someone about it. I don’t even touch on the fact that he just bullied the absolute shit out of her or threw racial slurs at her constantly, I just go directly to the fact that he literally said he wanted her dead.

Anyway, sorry for the tangent, back to what I originally wanted to rant about.

The thing that I consider the “catalyst” for all this bullshit is the infamous Wonderland interview J.K. Rowling did with Emma Watson in 2014. At the time it came out, it left a huge pit in my stomach. And it honestly still leaves a huge pit in my stomach whenever I think about it. 

Yes, I know this interview is six years old, but like I said, this shit still gets under my skin even after all these years, and I’ve never really been able to coherently rant about it, so I’m doing it now.

And also before I continue, I just want to say that I know there have always been shipping wars. They didn’t just come about in 2014 when this interview was released. But it definitely fueled the fire for those who argue against Romione (especially Harmione shippers). Because let’s be real here, what better fuel is there than the actual author of the series and the creator of these characters going back on her written word and saying Hermione actually should’ve ended up with Harry instead of Ron? I’m getting ahead of myself here, back to it. 

At the time the Wonderland interview was leaked, only a portion of it was leaked. And the portion that was leaked was the portion that completely made it sound like J.K. Rowling was going against Ron and Hermione’s relationship completely because it mainly centered around her saying she should have put Hermione with Harry in the end and her reason for putting Hermione with Ron instead was “wish fulfillment.” So obviously, an uproar resulted from this and my Romione heart was broken (for reasons I’ll touch more on in a minute). However, sometime later, the full interview was released, which means full context of what J.K. Rowling was talking about was released. And the full context should’ve made me feel better, but it really didn’t. Because while she did admit that Ron and Hermione were ultimately still endgame, she also said that they would most likely need counseling at some point and “they will probably fine.” 

There’s a lot to unpack here, and I could honestly run through this interview with a fine-tooth comb and pick apart literally everything wrong with it because I’m a feisty protective bitch when it comes to Romione, but for the sake of time, I’m only going to touch on three main points.

To be quite honest, after all these years, I still really can’t decide what I have a bigger problem with -- J.K. Rowling going back on her own written word and saying she should’ve put Hermione with Harry, or J.K. Rowling saying Ron and Hermione would need outside help to manage their relationship. So let’s go through it in the order this bullshit was put out into the world, because I think that’s the easier thing to do right now.

Like I said earlier, I see the appeal with the Harmione relationship. But ultimately, it just doesn’t work. For one thing, there are seven whole books where Harry and Hermione’s relationship is developed into something quite platonic and even sibling-like. I really could just leave it at that, but I won’t. I’ll do kind of a deep dive because I’m in that kind of mood and I have the time today. I’ve said this before, but one of my favorite things about the Harry and Hermione relationship is the fact that they are, for all intents and purposes, the sibling that the other never had. They are comfortable enough confiding in each other, but they also don’t always know how to react to how the other is acting or how to comfort the other when they’re upset without it blowing up in their faces or how to comfort the other at all. 

The other thing I want to touch on with the Harry and Hermione relationship, is the fact that neither one of them reacts in a negative way when one of them has a love interest. Which is kind of a big deal. The only time I can think of where there was a bad reaction to a love interest, is when Hermione reveals she asked Cormac McLaggen to Slughorn’s Christmas party. Which wasn’t even really a love interest, it was just something Hermione did to piss Ron off. And the negative reaction to it wasn’t at all motivated by jealousy but just by pure dislike. Other than that, there really are no reactions to love interests. Harry doesn’t care that Hermione is at the Yule Ball with Viktor Krum, because he’s too busy lusting over Cho Chang and thinking about the fact that she is there with someone else. Harry doesn’t really think about the fact that Cormac McLaggen is making Hermione uncomfortable at Slughorn’s Christmas party, because he’s too busy lusting over Ginny and thinking about the fact that she is with someone else. 

And perhaps the best and most important example I can think of to prove the point that they absolutely do not have any romantic feelings for each other whatsoever, is this -- after Ron left in Deathly Hallows, not only did Harry and Hermione barely interact with each other, but Harry was way too busy focusing on Ginny and worrying if she was okay or not to even attempt to comfort Hermione, who was crying all the time over Ron’s departure. As much as Steve Kloves wanted to imply that Harry and Hermione were carrying on fine for the most part after Ron left and they could have given into “urges” one night, that’s simply not how it happened.

Since I feel like I’ve made my point with that, that’s enough of Harry and Hermione relationship dissection. Moving on to the next order of bullshit.

Obviously I am a shameless Romione shipper. I would scream it from the rooftops if I could. So the fact that J.K. Rowling herself said that Ron and Hermione’s relationship would need outside help and they would “probably” be fine is upsetting in and of itself, but there are a lot of other issues here. For one thing, just like with Harry and Hermione’s relationship development, there are seven whole books where Ron and Hermione’s relationship is developed into friendship and gradually into something more. If anything, to me it’s a great example of a slow burn relationship. I absolutely don’t believe that the attraction was immediate for either one of them. It was very much a “who the fuck is this” introduction for them. But over time, you see how they warm up to each other. 

Anyway, back to what I was originally saying. Ron and Hermione’s relationship was very well developed, and it was clear that they were always going to be endgame. Over the course of seven books, we see Ron and Hermione getting to know each other, becoming comfortable with each other, learning how to comfort each other, among many other things. And I feel like I need to address this, because this is always the main argument for people who dislike the Romione ship -- yes, Ron and Hermione have arguments. But the important thing to know about the way they argue, is the intent is almost never malicious. For one thing, it’s just how they communicate sometimes. For another thing, it’s intellectual stimulation on Hermione’s part. Hermione’s the class brainiac, no one really bothers to challenge her except for Ron. In both of these instances, the arguing isn’t necessarily a negative thing. @owlpostagain wrote an entire post explaining why Ron and Hermione argue, and it’s one of the best things I’ve ever read. I reblog it every single time I see it on my dashboard. If you haven’t read it, I would highly encourage it.

I also really want to touch on the argument that they’re too different. That Hermione is too uptight and too much of a rule follower, and Ron is too much of a goofball and a little bit of a slacker compared to Hermione. And to those people who present that as an argument against their relationship, I just simply say that’s exactly why they work so well. Hermione needs someone like Ron, and Ron needs someone like Hermione. Hermione needs Ron to help loosen her up, and Ron needs Hermione to remind him that there are times when he needs to be serious. It’s a healthy balance. And remember how I said earlier that I see a lot of myself in Hermione, and I can admit that I need someone like Ron? Well, this is why. I’m a type A stress bean, and I need someone who will not only know how to comfort me but also helps me relax and loosen up when needed. Because, just like Hermione, it’s a struggle for me to relax. There are times when I don’t even know how to relax.

And while I’m at it, here’s another gripe I have with people who argue against Ron and Hermione’s relationship (this wasn’t really talked about in the Wonderland interview, but we’re already in this far, so why not? I’ll make it super quick, I promise) -- For some reason, a lot of anti-Romione’s like to argue that Hermione deserved so much better than Ron because she is smart and he is dumb. Now, here is my rebuttal to that argument -- Number one, book smart is not the only kind of smart. Number two, yes, Hermione is smart. So do you really think she would actually fall in love with someone who is genuinely dumb? Please make it make sense.

I could honestly go into Ron and Hermione’s relationship beat by beat and explain exactly why they’re perfect together, but that’s not the focus of today’s post. So let’s keep going.

The last thing I want to go over, is just the interview overall. Because it really bothered me how J.K. Rowling just essentially ripped the rug out from under our feet and went against her own written word. I understand that J.K. Rowling is the author of the series, she is the creator of these characters, so she’s technically allowed to say and do what she wants regarding the series. However, it doesn’t really fly with me. Because let’s think about this -- J.K. Rowling is very meticulous with her notes and timeline planning and everything that goes into writing. Especially when it came to the Harry Potter series. So we all know that what eventually ended up happening had been planned for years. Therefore, I’m of the opinion that if she really felt so strongly about Hermione being better with Harry, then it should have been executed that way. Point blank period. Don’t spend seven books laying the groundwork for Ron and Hermione to end up together and actually put them together, only to come out years later and say “actually I kind of think Hermione should’ve ended up with Harry, but I guess Ron and Hermione are fine.” Because it’s bullshit. I understand that opinions can change over time, but it’s not like she can go back and change the entire series (because that’s exactly what she would have to do in order to make Harmione make sense as a romantic couple; the entire series would have to be rewritten), so why even stir the pot with this? To say I have beef with J.K. Rowling over this whole situation would be the understatement of the century.

At the end of the day, all I really need to do is remind myself that Ron and Hermione do start out as friends, they do fall in love with each other, they do end up together, and they do have children together. It’s in writing from J.K. Rowling herself. It is canon. And that can’t ever be taken away or unwritten.

If you made it this far in this post, mad props to you because I really went in on this and I truly did not mean to get this worked up. When I finally start rereading the books, I’ll dissect the Ron and Hermione relationship even more and I’ll make posts about that if you guys are interested. If anyone would like more of a deep dive on what I think of the Harmione or Dramione dynamics, let me know because I would definitely be up for doing posts about that as well.

#Personal #Rant #Long rant #Romione #Ron and Hermione #Ron + Hermione #Ron x Hermione #Ron Weasley #Hermione Granger

[i-write-sometimes-blog]

The Blobfish (Rey x Reader)

Request: Kind of a lame request but maybe one where the reader and Rey live together on Jakku and after a long day of scavenging when they go to get their rations Unkar rips them off and then they put him in his place? By anon.

Words: 1,338

A/N: this was a bit tricky tbh. Hope y'all doing fine and well, hope you like it. Also, thanks for the incredible request you've been sending, I love them and I hope to post them soon.

Every inch of your body ached from the long day of work yet you felt satisfied with all the pieces you collected, you couldn’t have done it without Rey. Since you two teamed to scavenging life was easier, funnier, worthy. You couldn’t just imagined a proper life without her in it.

You looked at her waiting in front of you, her features looked as tired as yours must look, her clothes were dusty like everyone else here and still she managed to look incredibly gorgeous with those little buns in the back of her head. She was distracted contemplating the metal pieces on her hands, you decided to wrap your hands around her waist resting your chin softly over her shoulder.

“That’s a nice repulsor” you murmured her with a smile referring to the device on her hands, she gave you a small laugh.

“How many rations do you think he will pay us for it?” she said as one of her hands left the device and moved to hold your hand that was still around her.

“Enough, I hope.” you giggled “ ‘cause that shit was really hard to get.”

“True.” she said smiling.

The line moved when a scavenger left with a few rations on her hands, she looked so upset but that was how it worked. The Blobfish, as you called him behind his back, decided how much were the parts worthy, not questions, no bargaining, it was take the food or leave it and die, that was the way life was in the cruel desert.

“Hopefully more than he paid her.” you murmured to Rey with pity on your voice.

“Hey, keep moving you two.” said a man covered completely in dark cloth, one of Unkar’s thugs. Giving him an angry stare you obeyed, letting go of Rey’s waist as she moved closer to the window.

When your turn came the sun was threatening to hide in the distance.

“What you bring me today?” the big fat man asked sharply as soon as you were in front of his bars, immediately you and Rey placed your pieces for him to see, everything except the repulsor, that was a different deal.

Unkar Plutt, the junk boss of Jakku examined carefully all the thing you provided him, muttering thing for himself, Rey and you exchanged gazes as you waited in silence for his response.

“I’ll give you… hmm.” He said playing with the pieces on his very fat hands. "One and a half"

"Why not two?" You said raising a brow, you knew those pieces were worthy.

"This one's a bit rusty" he pointed at a small one. "Take it or leave it."

"Fine, that will do for today" you said taking the food rations.

"We have another thing" said Rey showing the artefact, Unkar took it and analyzed it closely then what seemed to be a smile appeared on his face, now he really looked like a blobfish.

Rarely someone made this man smile, he had a rather angry face all the time, that was a good sign. You took Rey's hand and gave her a bright smile as you saw she was kinda nervous, but she didn't have to be, that repulsor was worth a ton of food for sure, enough for a while, to take a break from the hard work. You thought of some numbers, fifty maybe even sixty portions.

"Five, just because you girls always bring me good stuff." He announced placing the bags for you to take it.

"Five!?" Rey and you asked at the same time.

"Wait, that's too low, Unkar!" Rey said raising her voice a bit so some of the other scavengers looked at her.

"Careful, sweetheart" he warned as a couple of his thugs came closer, weapons in hand. Rey glanced at them for a moment, they would be easy to take down but she didn't want trouble, not after all those years working for Unkar.

"Okay" she sighed.

"Good girl" said Plutt with an ever bigger grin over his face.

Rey seemed so upset, this was not right, sure he always paid you less than he should but this was ridiculous and after all you and Rey passed through to get that metal thing you were not willing to accept that.

"No." You said firm and Rey gave you a questioning stare. "This piece cost sixty portions, not less."

"Y/N, don't…"

"He's robbing us, Rey, you know it." You told her when she tried to calm you down.

"But we have enough food for some days." She added with a pleading gaze.

"No, he has to pay us what's worthy" you said and then you stepped closer to Unkar's window protected with bars. "So, sixty rations or nothing, it's your choice " you hissed taking the repulsor from his hand. Immediately the thugs behind you got ready to attack, just waiting for a word from their boss.

"We are not afraid of your thugs." You heard Rey firm voice as you saw her holding her quarterstaff in her hands, her gaze met yours and she nodded.

Before the Blobfish could even give an order Rey took down two of the men with ease, long used to defending lves.herself.

A new man approached to you from the back, quickly you hitted his nose with your elbow making him back off in pain.

“See, the thing is, we know you, Unkar.” you told him “We know you don’t care about other than yourself, you don’t have respect for anybody. Alway acting so tough and mean, but you’re just so afraid of us.” with every word you got closer to the window, Rey beside you holding her weapon up in case someone decided to attack again. “That’s why you hire those thugs, to make sure none of us stand against you, isn’t it?”

You observed Unkar, his yucky features clenching in both fear and anger. Then finally Rey said something to him, in all Jakku she would be the last person that would stand against him, and maybe the one that had more reasons to actually do it.

“You hide behind those bars because you know we outnumber you, Unkar!” Rey growled pointing her weapon at his wobbly neck. “You want the repulsor, you hear my girl. Sixty portions.” she said.

“You really think imma give you that much food?” The blobfish hissed.

“I suggest you do it.” you added “You don’t want to lose two of your best scavengers, do you, Blobfish?” you said making sure he heard clearly.

Around you the rest of the scavengers had stopped their usual routine to watch the show, unable to believe finally someone had confronted the junk boss. Some of them gasped as others laughed at his face looking so desperately for help, Unkar Plutt was speechless for the first time.

“Deal.” he said swaloging hard. Rey lowered her quarterstaff smiling satisfied. The big man moved inside his stand and came back with the sixty portions, your hands moved to the food as you couldn’t believe your eyes.

After taking the food you let the repulsor on his hand, enjoying the power you had over this man.

“A pleasure to do business with you.” you mocked one last time.

“Yeah, yeah, yeah. You have what you wanted now move, you’re stopping the row.” his said with his disrespectful tone back on his voice.

When you left the outpost the night had almost fallen completely over the dessert, creating a colorful painting over the sky with the last rays of sun.

“That was awesome, Y/N!” Rey told you all excited as you arrived to the speeder waiting outside the outpost, making sure there was enough distance between you and the rest of the scavengers so they wouldn’t heard her. “I never thought I’d see that many food in my life!”

“You were amazing back there” you told her as you placed an arm around her waist and gave her a quick kiss on the cheek. “Now let’s go home, Rey.”

Tagging: @1-800-depressedlesbian

(In case you want to be tagged for specific things or everything I write, just let me know)

#rey of jakku #rey star wars #rey x reader #rey x y/n #i-write-sometimes-blog #rey of nowhere #rey x you #star wars imagine #star wars #rey #rey imagine #jakku #rey of jakku x reader #the force awakens #tfa #star wars tfa #tlj #star wars tlj #tros

[hqwkeyes]

I Love You

Pairing: Natasha Romanoff x Reader

Word Count: 2,281

Warning(s): angst, fluff, language, severe injury, mention of blood, talk of death

Summary: When a mission goes very wrong, one of their own gets hurt. What happens if they can’t pull through?

A/N: Oh boy, it’s been a long time since I last posted anything. It’s been even longer since I got this request. This is the oldest request that I have, and I just want to apologize to the sweet anon who sent it to me for taking so long to write it. I hope you’re still out there! Anyway, I really hope you enjoy this! I loved writing it.

Masterlist // Buy me a coffee!

Steve had called in a half hour prior saying that the mission had gone south and to prep the med bay, although he didn’t say who was injured. Clint flew the quinjet back in record timing, which meant it was serious. I paced back and forth the entire half hour, wringing my hands together and trying to mentally prepare myself for the possibility that it could be her.

Nothing could have prepared me for what happened, though.

“Fuck!” I shouted, slamming my fists against the wall when they rushed her in on the gurney.

Blood dripped onto the floor as they wheeled her down to the med bay, which Steve nearly slipped on as he tailed the stretcher. The swift trip to the med bay felt like an eternity with her life on the line.

Steve, Clint, and Bucky helped transfer the stretcher onto the table with the doctors, and then we were all forced behind the glass doors so they could get to work.

There was a deep gash in her cheek, as well as several on her abdomen, indicated by her torn up stealth suit. It was unlikely that they would be serious injuries, though.

What had me worried was the number of bullet wounds that ravaged her body. Two had hit her in the left thigh, both going through and through. Another was lodged in her shoulder, and another thankfully only nicked her arm. Then, there were the shrapnel wounds. Fragments had torn up a good portion of the lower left side of her abdomen. I could hear the doctors saying that there was internal bleeding because of it. Within minutes they had taken x-rays and were rushing her to the operating room.

I attempted to follow, but they told me to stay back with the rest of the team. Of course, I tried to follow again anyway, but Sam and Tony held me back. We waited for four hours for some kind of news. You would think that will all the extremely advanced technology Tony provides the medical wing with, they would have finished earlier, but no.

In the meantime, everyone who was out on the mission explained what had happened from their perspective. In summary, while facing off against the remaining HYDRA members at the base, another group showed up. The team said they didn’t know who they were, but they definitely weren’t HYDRA. They had attacked them all, but it seemed they specifically targeted her. They snuck up behind them, too. “The ultimate sneak attack,” Clint had called it—even he didn’t see it coming from his position in the trees.

I had been desperately clinging to Bucky on one of the couches for a while when someone finally came in with some news.

“She’s out of surgery, but resting for now. You can see her, but only for a few minutes, and only two or three people are allowed in the room at a time,” the doctor explained, and I was dashing toward her room before they finished speaking. Clint and Steve were close behind, silently joining me in the room. The tears began to spill again as soon as I saw her, and I heard the two men step out of the room to give me a moment with her.

“Nat,” I quietly choked out.

Her red tresses were caked with dry blood, turning them dark and stringy. I pulled one of the chairs closer to her bed and gently held her hand, pressing a soft kiss to a bruise blossoming on her skin.

“I need you to come back to me,” I whispered against her hand.

After sitting alone and talking to Natasha for a while, Clint and Steve came back, and I stepped outside for them. The others came in pairs throughout the day—even Thor, who had been in Asgard for a while.

I sat with her throughout the night, watching the rise and fall of her chest as she rested. It was impossible to sleep, though, with all of the machines beeping and blinking around her.

At dawn, Bruce came in and told me to go get some rest. Of course I refused, I didn’t want to leave her side, not even for a second. Somehow, though, he managed to convince me to go shower and grab something to eat.

“Just take twenty minutes. I’ll stay right here with her the whole time,” he told me.

After ten minutes of taking a much-needed shower, I got out, dried myself off, dressed myself, and headed to the kitchen for a snack and some coffee. When I arrived at the kitchen, the whole team was on their feet.

“What happened?” I asked frantically, but no one answered.

I was hot on Steve’s heels, heading toward Nat’s room in the medical wing.

“What happened?” I repeated as Sam came up beside me, tears already dripping down my cheeks.

When I heard the high pitched ringing from down the hall, something inside me snapped. I stopped moving, causing Bucky, who was following close behind, to collide with me, sending me to the floor. I panted heavily, my palms pressed to the cold marble, and let out a blood-curdling scream. I felt a pair of arms lift me up, which I would later find out belonged to Bucky. He carried me the remainder of the way and held me close to him, even when I was kicking and screaming, trying to get into the room where the doctors were attempting to resuscitate the love of my life.

I watched on, screaming my lungs out, as her body jolted upward from the electricity of the defibrillator, but to no avail. Four times. Four times they shocked her, and none of them worked.

When they called her time of death, I accidentally cracked the glass wall with my fist before sliding to the floor in a series of wretched sobs. Wanda crouched down and wiped the tears dripping from my face. An hour later, Thor came back and wordlessly carried me to the living area. He set me down on the couch, where I remained for three days.

I hated Bucky for those three days, for keeping me away from her, but in the end, I understood that I only would’ve gotten in the way.

I spent three months after that still living with the Avengers before it began to be too much.

Natasha had asked me on our one year anniversary to move in with her and the rest of the Avengers. It had become harder to see each other with all of the missions she was going on, so I happily agreed. The team treated me like family, and Tony even gave me a job, although I was basically an extremely overpaid intern.

After her death, all I could see was her. Everywhere in the compound were the memories that we made together. I visited her grave every day, and that was somehow the least painful part of it.

She was buried beside Nick Fury. Ironic, wasn’t it? He was still alive, hiding in the shadows somewhere, while my beautiful Natasha lies in the ground beside his empty casket.

After those three months, I packed up and moved to an apartment in Brooklyn, cutting off most contact with the Avengers. I didn’t hate them. Honestly, I still loved them, but seeing them killed me because it reminded me of every moment I shared with them that included her. Thankfully, they understood. I only maintained contact with Steve and Clint, although only through the sometimes shared visits to her gravesite. We would sit and reminisce, usually cry. I preferred to go alone, though, so I could tell her everything going on inside my head, everything that happened throughout my day.

Today is seven months since she passed, and I still visit her nearly every day. I carry with me a bouquet of assorted red flowers and something to eat.

When I arrive at the cemetery, I gently set the flowers down against the stone, then run my fingers over it before sitting down on the freshly grown grass. Slowly, I eat, talking to her in between bites.

“I know it’s already been seven months,” I say, beginning to cry, “but I feel like it was yesterday and also an eternity.”

I don’t let the tears fall. Instead, I wipe them on the back of my wrist and continue talking, telling her about my day, my job, my memories of her.

I wrap up the remnants of my lunch as I speak, having lost my appetite, “I know it’s cliché or something—you were never a fan of clichés—but I don’t think I’ll ever love someone again, at least not in the way I’ll always love you.

“It’s probably unhealthy to say that, but I just don’t think I’ll ever be able to fully let you go. I don’t think anyone from the team will either, especially Clint and Steve. I’m not sure if they’ve told you, but they feel responsible for what happened. I’m sure you know that they did all they could. You’d probably smack them off the back of the head for saying something like that—or maybe you would understand. You’ve told me things before that make me feel like you would.”

I glance at my watch and realize how quickly the time has passed. It always flew by when I was with her—even now it still does. I tell her this as I stand up to leave.

“Anyway, I should go.” The tears begin to fall again as I step forward and press my lips to the tips of my fingers, then to her headstone.

“I love you,” I whisper before slowly turning away, and suddenly I scream.

My own hand flies over my mouth as stare in shock and awe, wondering if I’ve passed out and this is some elaborate dream.

“You don’t have to come here anymore,” she says, and I nearly fall to my knees. She steps closer and grips me by my forearms to steady me, then steps back again.

I launch myself into her arms, squeezing her against me so hard that I hear her wince. She closes her arms around me too, though, and I relax against her.

“How are you here?” I murmur against the skin of her neck before pulling away to gaze at her again. Her hair is a natural blonde and much longer than I’ve seen it before.

She nods behind me, “After the attack, I decided to borrow someone else’s trick.”

I look behind me at Nick Fury’s headstone, and laugh, shaking my head. Within a moment, though, the laugh turns to some kind of angry sadness.

“Why-” I start.

“I did it to protect you and the others. I needed to figure out who it was who tried to kill me,” she says before explaining all of the details under the shade of a tree that would definitely conceal her identity from a distance. Luckily, the cemetery was mostly empty, with only a few people scattered a good distance away.

After she finishes, she picks up the bouquet I left on her grave and takes my hand in hers.

“How about we head back to your apartment? There are a few people there waiting for you,” she says with that smile I never thought I’d see again.

Unable to form any words without crying, I nod.

After walking for a moment, I stop and realize, “Wait, how do you know about my apartment?”

“After I discovered who had attacked us that day, I slowly exterminated them. I finished with that about two months ago, but I needed to wait to make contact with you just to be sure that they were all gone for good.

“I found out that you moved out of the compound and found your new address. This is a lot to take in, I know. I’m so sorry. It’s just- I was scared of how you’d react. I tried to knock on your door three times in the past few weeks, but I was so afraid that you would be angry.”

I wipe the tears from her face with my thumb before pressing a kiss to her cheek.

As we walk toward my apartment I ask, “And who is waiting at my apartment?”

“The team,” she says quietly. “Please don’t be upset. I contacted them through you and told them to meet you there. They should arrive a few minutes after us.”

I laugh and nod before telling her that it’s alright. Hard to process all at once, but alright. I’d rather rip off the bandaid quickly anyway.

We arrive at my apartment before the team does, just as Natasha had planned. A few minutes later, they knock on the door, and I crack it open a bit.

“I have someone here who wants to see you,” I say to the group of Avengers crowding the hallway outside my door before opening it wider.

Clint nearly knocks me on my ass as he pushes through and hugs Natasha. The rest follow in suit, although allowing me to step out of the way first. I close the door behind them and listen again as Natasha explains everything. At first they’re angry with her for not enlisting their help, but overall they understand why she did what she did.

Sam and I end up cooking some food for everyone to eat, and we all sit down and talk, sharing stories from our time away from one another, grateful that everything is right once again.

Natasha leans in and kisses my cheek before whispering something in my ear.

“I love you too.”

Masterlist // Buy me a coffee!

Original Request:

Note: If you would like to be added to my permanent tag list or my Natasha x Reader tag list, feel free to ask!

I’ll tag a few people who I think might be interested: @romqnofff @sargentjbbarnes @5aftermidnight​ @agentnatasharomanov​ @romanovobsessed​ @natalia-alianovna-bw​ @nat-blossom​ @lesbian-x-blackwidow​ @blackluthxr​ @blackmist111​ @seasonsofnat​

#hqwkeyes #natasha romanoff x reader #natasha romanoff #natasha romanoff fanfiction #natasha romanov #Natalia Romanova #natasha romanoff fic #natasha romanov x reader #natasha x reader #marvel #marvel fic #marvel fanfiction #steve rogers #tony stark #bucky barnes #sam wilson #wanda maximoff #bruce banner #thor #thor odinson #clint barton #x reader #x reader fanfiction

[cetologies]

i once again... need to vent. so i apologize. i don’t have another outlet but it is under a read more. this is my personal experience, on the off-chance someone reads this and decides to pick a fight with me. i feel like i don’t have to say that but alas, the internet.

posting this late at night so hopefully too many won’t be subjected to it. i go into detail a little bit on this stuff.

tw: ED, body dysmorphia, OCD, depression, SH, anxiety, s//cide ment

i’m sorry i tried to tag it as well as possible to cater to anything blacklisted, i will most likely delete this but otherwise if something needs to be tagged differently please tell me 

this is definitely the worst i’ve felt in a long time. years probably. and some of it is my fault, so i feel like i’m not allowed to complain. but i will anyway. all i’m asking is to get down to 115 again. i was that small when i was 16 and i want to be there again. i haven’t weighed myself with intention to see what weight i am in maybe 4-5 years. 

i make it a point when i go to doctors offices to not tell me my weight. i cover my eyes and *usually* explicitly state that. but i didn’t three years ago, though i said “i don’t want to know my weight” and put my hands over my eyes and she still told me my weight. i remember crying and being loud, the doctor (who had known me for years) had immediately asked the nurse if she told me my weight.

i’ve always had body image issues but holy shit not like this. i’ve suffered with depression and anxiety most of my life. i’ve ticked off almost every single box in terms of diagnosed mental illnesses (except schizophrenia... which even that i’m starting to check off a few). but like i said, holy shit never like this. i would like to say this is harder to deal with than the anxiety/depression i previously have dealt with, but i dont know anymore.

this definitely hurts so bad though. i am getting depressed again, and cannot see this getting better anytime soon. partially my fault once again. i’d just like to lose a little more weight before seeing a doctor. i think i weighed (at the time of that incident above) around 129?? which is... healthy for my height but so is 115. 

my problem is i can’t eat. i can’t think about eating. my default state is now just nausea. i get nauseous from not eating, i get nauseous thinking about eating, and i get nauseous from eating. since october i cant stomach anything. i started adderall in december and it made it 10x worse. i’ve since switched to adderall xr (adzenys?) and i can at least drink water now and only a get half as nauseous. but that was really scary!! i had a little swig of water, no more than a sip, and had to lay down for 4 hours because i was so nauseous. 

my main issue is now i feel guilty for eating. which is normal for eating disorders. but i can’t eat more than 100 calories without wanting to self harm. it’s ridiculous, and i know it’s ridiculous but unfortunately that’s the number i can’t let go. i cried for an hour today bc i ate those lil brownie little bites and it was the second thing i ate today (aside from celery, which i also got sick and felt bad about eating bc i googled the calories: 60) and accidently saw how many calories they were. 240. 

so i ate 300 calories today and that was enough to make me want to vomit (i can’t, i’m emetophobic) and crawl into a hole and disappear. i have never ever dealt with stuff like this before and it’s so scary. i’m afraid my health is failing because of it but i can’t stop. it’s so unrealistic to eat less than 100 calories a day. the standard recommended is 2000, yet for some reason i can’t eat more than 100 without wanting to die

i check my body measurements 3-4 times a day. i spend at LEAST two hours in front of a mirror body checking and looking at my figure from all angles. these issues have definitely stemmed from my figure along with my insecurities. my entire life the only thing i’ve been complimented on is my measurements. it’s all i have. i’m not very pretty, but people are in love with my figure. and i am too! so many people tell me my body is great the way it is but i don’t care what they think, i care what i think. and i think i need to go back down to 115. 

i’ve chalked up my self worth to my body measurements. it’s not something that’s generally achievable without surgery, so it feels almost like a trophy to me because of how fucked up my brain is. i can’t lose it because that’s the only thing that i like about myself. or at least the only thing i like about myself that i don’t want to impulsively destroy like my eyelashes

and it’s not like i’m trying to achieve a completely flat stomach or anything. i just look a little disproportionate to me, since i carry fat only in the stomach. a little pudge is natural and i understand that. like i said, 115 is still healthy for 5′3′’. it’s not like im trying to drop down below 100. i had told myself once i lost the weight, then i’ll go get help for the fact i am violently nauseous no matter what.

which leads me to my next problem: this is my only solution. i can’t lose weight through exercise (esp exercise that involves numbers) bc of my OCD. i have such bad obsessive nature with any numbers (as stated w/ my weight, my body measurements, etc) and like i did when i started looking at calories, i’ll become so obsessive with exercise that if he doesn’t reach my fantastical expectations, i’ll want to self harm.

something that’s really making me upset is i specifically never looked at calories, checked my weight, etc. because i knew this would happen. i went out of my way to avoid stuff like this bc i knew i was susceptible to this kind of thinking and it still happened anyway. my body is going to start shutting down soon if it hasn’t started already. 

it’s fucking ridiculous though! i’ve tried to kill myself (and still, suffering as i am, i still thank god i made it out alive) and it’s just crazy that that was over anxiety, depression, agoraphobia, bullying, etc. and now i want to kill myself bc i ate CELERY!!! bc it’s 60 calories!!! like its so illogical!! i’m a very naturally logical person so this is just like each side of my brain hitting the other with a bat.

it doesn’t look like i’ve lost any weight, despite purposely not eating for 4 months. my grades are bad, my gpa dropped .5 points bc of covid and i’m fucking stupid anyway. i try my best not to self harm bc of my fear of blood but i usually end up scratching myself til i bleed anyway. 

i’m suffering and trying my best to make it through this but i’m trying my best. i just want to wait to get help until i lose a little more. but i am fucking suffering. all i want is to eat again. or at least to eat and not feel guilty afterwards. my portions are so much smaller, i can only eat a few bites of any meal and it’s so fucking scary but i can’t stop myself from wanting to lose more.

like i said, i’ve always had body image issues but nothing like this. i’m so so so scared but. there’s nothing my brain will allow me to do until i lose a little more weight. im afraid im causing/on the road to causing irreversible damage but i just!! can’t stop!! not being able to eat more than 100 calories is so fucking ridiculous i’m ashamed of myself. i shouldn’t be having anxiety attacks over eating celery.

#sorry i've been crying all day over the last thing #daelin speaks #body dysmorphia // #tw body dysmorphia #tw body image #body image // #eating disorder // #tw eating disorder #ocd // #tw ocd #tw depression #depression // #tw self harm mention #self harm mention // #tw anxiety #anxiety // #tw suicide #suicide //

[master-of-the-opera-house]

(Franz Ferdinand as a teenager, presumably late 1870s. Franz Ferdinand and Sophie Chotek on their wedding day, 1900. Franz Ferdinand and Sophie Chotek, undated. Franz Ferdinand and Sophie Chotek, early 1910s.)

As anyone who bothers knows, ever since my trip to Sarajevo, I rediscovered the Archduke whose assassination caused WWI and shaped the modern world as we know it. But I want to take a day in this month (April is Autism Acceptance Month, after all) to say something that I've noticed in my attempts to uncover Franz Ferdinand's story.

First off, I'd like to say that we probably can’t accurately, flat-out diagnose historical figures. Simply because what we have left of them often doesn't tell the whole story, and also because we wouldn't know, first-hand, what they were experiencing. And also because we're not professionals; this isn’t exactly the same as self-diagnosis. But I also acknowledge that science and medicine has come a long way, and many things that historical figures were going through could possibly fit the criteria for certain disabilities and/or illnesses as we know them today. It's something people have discussed about multiple historical figures, but so far, I've yet to see anyone entertain the notion of Franz Ferdinand POSSIBLY being neurodivergent. Maybe it's because we tend to attach neurodiversity or disability to masters as a way to explain their genius (another suitcase to unpack another day). But the thing about neurodiversity - and autism, specifically, in this case - is that anyone can be neurodivergent/autistic. Even royal victims of assassinations whose deaths mean more to history than their lives.

((That being said, most of this post is going to be based on my own experiences as an autistic person, because I can’t speak for the experiences of other autistic people that may apply. If anyone else has anything to add please feel free to drop me an ask or a message, I’d love to discuss this!))

One of the things I've noticed in almost all of Franz Ferdinand's photographs ((images/slide before cut)) is that he's always got his hands clasped together like that. I guess it can be brushed off as something someone who is unsure of what to do with their hands in photographs might do, but I haven't really seen anyone do it quite as much as him. I do speculate he might've been stimming - a common experience in autistic people. Stimming is a repetitive action that brings comfort or relief to the individual. I think it’s notable how he always reverted back to this pose or action as seen from how these photographs were clearly taken at different points in his life, perhaps indicating that he might have found something comforting about it. Interlacing or rubbing one's fingers/hands together is quite a common form of stimming, and can be quite subtle - which would make sense for someone who probably couldn't resort to a more overt action for it being seen as improper or unseemly as someone who came from both royal circles, and a more repressive time.

These excerpts recount a few details from his childhood, particularly, picking up strong interests, being fond of the rituals and routine of religion, and struggling in school. These strong interests - special interests, to those on the spectrum - will be further explored later. Autistic people tend to find solace in routine, and I think it is of no secret that autistic children may have trouble in school, especially if the environment isn't suited to their needs (education for upper-class children in the past was especially tedious), or if the content covered isn't in line with their special interests. In Franz Ferdinand's case, these interests would comprise of hunting, architecture and history, at which he would excel in contrast to nearly everything else taught to him, and which he would pursue as an adult. I think it's also worth noting, as per the last piece of text in the second slide, that this inaptitude for just sitting down and studying was something that followed him well into adulthood. This was in spite of contemporaries observing that he was otherwise intelligent and able to approach problems from different perspectives: yet another common autistic trait.

This following set of excerpts I find especially fascinating, because I think they're almost transparent about how his interests go beyond 'neurotypical hobbies’, simply because of how “obsessive” he appeared about them, centering his life around them ((organising a world tour with one of its main purposes being to hunt, for instance, or planning family trips around his hunting)) and investing a lot of resources into them as the books discuss. He's also said to be fond of collecting things extensively here, assorted things that pique his interest (yet another interest that manifested itself from his childhood), which is also pretty common amongst autistic people who may grow very attached to certain items.

This next set of excerpts stings of the struggles of being neurodivergent, and hit the closest to home for me. The first three pieces of text consist of people's perceptions of him: 'mad', 'insane', and 'strange' seem to be the most frequent accusations (so frequent, in fact, that there’s a significant portion on it on his wikipedia page which I have not seen with other historical figures), which is..... Telling, especially from a time in which mental health isn't really understood. They're what people conclude about someone who doesn't quite behave in the way they're used to, even if there's often a good reason why said people behave in such different ways. The way neurodivergent people often behave, for a lack of understanding of social cues, sensory sensitivity, to name a few possible reasons. One of the most common accusations of his personality, of course, were of his explosive temper and generally temperamental disposition. Whilst I do think those were definitely his personal shortcomings, I also do think some of his infamous outbursts may have really been meltdowns, explaining their unpredictability, especially to people who didn’t know what his triggers were ((and, regrettably, we don’t have many clues in that area either because such things were simply not watched out for and thus not recorded)). He was visibly very uncomfortable in social settings, too, as seen from these quotes, and certainly didn't pick up on how to win favour in them, which I think a lot of autistic people ((stereotypically, but not always inaccurately)) have difficulty with. You can see more of this in the 6th and 7th excerpts, where his beloved wife Sophie figured out a set of social cues that worked for him and guided him in such interactions throughout their relationship. He very much returned the affection, so much so that he was rather possessive or obsessive about her, blowing up at any offenses directed at her, defending her where her position would not allow it and ultimately further sacrificing his reputation for his love. Needless to say, such behaviour (again!) wasn’t understood by those around him, though he loved her boundlessly and probably didn’t care, and vice versa. Sometimes, it led to other inappropriate or unwelcomed acts on his part as observed in the 9th piece of text, but ‘Franzi’ and ‘Soph’ made it work anyways, which is more than what can be said about many of their contemporaries.

Another thing I’m pointing out on this post is his rather black-and-white view of the world, as demonstrated in the rather unpleasant ((but admittedly quite funny in its tactlessness)) quote in the last excerpt. Oftentimes, autistic people can find it hard to grasp nuances, categorising things into 'good' or 'bad'. I think that's certainly how he saw the world and the people around him, leading to rather strong opinions in both the private and political sphere that, needless to say, wasn't a very popular trait of his, being very generous towards people he favoured and outrightly hostile to people he didn’t. One thing these slides don't address are records of sensory sensitivity, many of which can be found in his ((rather extensive)) travel diaries whenever he'd pay special attention to how a certain place smelt weird or was really noisy. All that being said, I don't think it was a surprise Franz Ferdinand wasn't a very well-liked person at all, shunned in life and unmourned in death, simply because people didn't have the resources to understand where his differences and shortcomings were stemming from. I just wish he had it better than to go to his grave with such a tainted reputation. But I guess this is also the best I can give him now, to try to understand his story through different lenses, something he was known to do in his own life. After all, difference is something we're both accustomed to. And I'm glad he managed to find fulfilment, especially from the family he built, even in spite of all the struggles thrown at him, in spite of his untimely end, because hey, that's the least he deserved. 🌈♾️

(All text images are taken from the books The Assassination of the Archduke by Greg King and Sue Woolmans, and The Archduke and the Assassin by Lavender Cassels.)

#history edit #archduke franz ferdinand #sophie chotek #austrian history #disability history #history #habsburg #austro-hungarian empire #autism acceptence month #idk if anyone will read it but please remember this is a speculative post! #i have been thinking about it for some time now but ultimately #my conclusions are based on my experience as an autistic person and whatever we have of someone whos been dead 100+ years #but i do very much stand by this hhhhh #the master thinks some things #ok to reblog #in fact please do #:") #also yeah i do admit he could be lowkey problematic but like. It Be Like That #like if youre living in that time and have a very black and white world view clouded by shitty experiences #it do be like that sometimes #-\_(ツ)_/- #and also being problematic and being neurodivergent or having any sort of minority experience isnt mutually exclusive #idk i feel that's a thing people on here forget about history sometimes #anyways im rambling #here it is franz ferdinand possibly neurodivergent post #i may write a paper on this someday

[thebluemartini]

Far From the Shallow - EPILOGUE [Nessian Fic]

TITLE: Far From the Shallow SYNOPSIS: Post-ACOFAS. As part of a deal with Feyre, Nesta has agreed to live with Cassian in the Illyrian Mountains. However, shortly after her arrival, she receives the startling news that she’s pregnant from one of her one-night stands. While she tries to quickly get a grip on her life, Cassian’s determined to make her see that she’s not facing this alone.

FIC LENGTH: Multi-chapter (14 chapters total)

PREVIOUS CHAPTERS: Chapter 1 / Chapter 2 / Chapter 3 / Chapter 4 / Chapter 5 / Chapter 6 / Chapter 7 / Chapter 8 / Chapter 9 / Chapter 10 / Chapter 11 / Chapter 12 / Chapter 13

TAGGING: @bohemiandreams27 @queenofillea1 @trash-for-nessian @nestaarcheronwillkillme @my-fan-side @strangeenemy @maastrash @cageddovepoetry @bybooksanddreams @lilbat90 @ritamordio19 @mastercommandercaptain @feysand-dot-acotar @archeron-queen @welcometothespeaknowworldtour @empress-ofbloodshed @there-is-warmth-in-winter @mybbyfeyre @saltydreamcollector @justlikethecheshirecat @mis-lil-red @supebowlere @monstrousloves-explodinggalaxies @everything-that-i-love @sezkins79 @hashtolanashoba @lord-douglas-the-third @rhysandsdarlingfeyre @hikari274 @acotar-and-tog-for-life @ellenoftroy @ink-nibs @highlordofthenightcourttrash @sesquipedalian-aficionado @tintinnabulary

*This chapter is also posted on AO3 and FF.

_______________________________________________________________

EPILOGUE

Dahlia could already walk and talk by the time Cassian deemed it safe for her and Nesta to live in the Illyrian Mountains.

They’d only moved to Illyria one week ago, yet Nesta couldn’t help but feel at peace already. Over the past few years, she’d been experiencing a feeling of restlessness that left her anxious.

But now her and Dahlia were finally living with Cassian, and it finally felt like they were a true family.

Of course, they’d always been a family, but now...now the life her and Cassian had dreamed about had truly come to fruition.

Now Cassian could sleep beside Nesta each night, and when Dahlia thought there were monsters in her room, she could now have the comfort and safety of coming to their bedroom to sleep in between both of her parents. When it was time to sit down for dinner each night, it wasn’t just Nesta who encouraged Dahlia to eat all her food, but Cassian could too. When Dahlia would get sleepy but insist she still wanted to stay up, now Cassian and her could take her to bed together and read her a nighttime story.

It was little moments like these they’d be able to share together by living under one roof, and Nesta was so grateful.

Things weren’t exactly perfect in Illyria. There was still a long way to go in the treatment of females and children, but the Illyrians had shown improvement in listening to Cassian after he dedicated much of his time to visiting and training with the various camps to know and understand them more.

In his conversations with camp leaders, it finally didn’t seem like they wanted to murder him. They even started showing him some respect.

Plus, Nesta had learned how to better control and use her powers with the help of Amren and her siphon. She had learned how to winnow short distances from Feyre too. With these abilities, she was more confident she could protect those she loved.

With all these pieces coming together, it seemed like it would finally be safe enough to live with Cassian in Illyria.

Thankfully, her official role in assisting the Inner Circle with correspondence with other fae and other courts didn’t require her to be living in any specific place.

As another precaution, her and Cassian had decided to live in a new cabin that was a little farther away from Windhaven. It was also a new cabin in honor of their new life as a family living together - one that hadn’t been tainted with memories of being threatened by other camps or being attacked.

As Nesta stirred a pot of stew on the stove, she smiled to herself as she thought about the possibly joyous moments they could fill their home with and the memories that had already been made there, such as the way Cassian embraced them when he came home from his day of training for the first time since they’d moved in. 

“Mommy, when is Daddy coming home?” Dahlia said as she wandered up to Nesta’s side with her stuffed horse tucked underneath her arm.

“Any minute now, my angel,” Nesta replied as she scooped a small portion of the stew into a bowl.

Then Nesta crouched down so she was nearly eye level with Dahlia, holding the bowl of stew and a spoon in her hands. “Lia,” Nesta began gently, calling her by her nickname. “Do you remember what you need to tell Daddy?”

Dahlia nodded eagerly. “That Mommy’s making lunch for him.”

“That’s right. Now this bowl is for you,” Nesta smiled as she handed her the bowl and spoon, which Dahlia accepted while still keeping her horse under her arm. “You can wait for him by the front door, but only go outside once you see Daddy through the window,” Nesta instructed. She was always overprotective when it came to Dahlia.

“Okay, Mommy,” Dahlia said as she ran over to the door while carrying her stew and horse.

_______________________________________________________________

When Cassian landed a short distance from his cabin, a wave of joy and peacefulness came over him.

Coming home to his family was a luxury he almost thought would never occur based on his troubles with the Illyrians. But here he was - nearly four years since Dahlia was born - about to step into his home and see both his love and his daughter for the seventh day in a row. He couldn’t help but feel ecstatic to embrace them.

As he took his first step toward the cabin, the front door creaked open, and he saw Dahlia walk outside. She stopped to put the bowl she was holding down on the porch before rushing up to him. A smile spread across Cassian’s face as he paused his stride. He bent his knees and outstretched his hands as he waited for her to come to him.

“Daddy! Daddy!” she exclaimed as she ran. Cassian could see the legs of the stuffed horse he had given her poking out from underneath her arm.

When she reached him, Cassian instantly closed his arms around her and lifted her off the ground. “How’s my baby girl?”

“Daddy, can I start learning how to fly today?” she asked, completely disregarding what he said. 

His heart broke a little as she asked her question. She asked him this everyday the past week. Her wings had finally been growing, but at a much slower rate than most Illyrians. An effect from the fall Nesta took, unfortunately. Him and Nesta were assured, however, that her wings would be full-grown one day.

“Hmm,” he said as he looked over her wings. Right now, they just weren’t large enough to support her body. “I think we need to wait a little bit longer, sweetheart,” he noted. “They aren’t big enough yet, but the longer they take to grow, the stronger they will be!” he emphasized.

Dahlia pouted. “But I want to fly.”

“You will, sweetheart,” Cassian reassured her. “One day.”

“Can you just fly me around right now instead?”

“Let’s go ask your mother first,” Cassian advised. Nesta was always nervous when he took Dahlia flying since she was still so young.

He started walking toward the porch, but Dahlia started getting fussy in his arms, wanting to be put down. He did as she requested, then she ran up ahead of him to the porch and grabbed her bowl.

Upon closer inspection, he noticed there was stew inside the bowl, which perplexed him. Only he cooked for the family, never Nesta. He’d always insisted he cook while in Illyria to prove a point to the Illyrians. Plus, Nesta could never offer him food unless she wanted to...

“Lia, where did that food come from?”

“Mommy made it,” she said before placing a spoonful in her mouth. “Mommy told me to tell you she made some for you too.”

Cassian’s eyes widened in shock and excitement as his heart started racing.

Nesta’s finally ready.

Thrilled by this revelation, he’d nearly been about to burst through the front door to reach Nesta, but he abruptly paused to crouch down and speak to Dahlia.

“Lia, do you remember that secret I told you to keep from Mommy because Mommy wasn’t ready to hear it yet?”

Dahlia nodded her head eagerly.

“Well, today you can finally tell Mommy.”

Dahlia gasped. “Can I tell her right now?”

“Yes, sweetheart,” he said as he held open the door for her. Cassian wasn’t far behind her as they hurried into the kitchen.

“Mommy! Mommy!” Dahlia cried out as she ran up to Nesta, who was standing by the stove.

Cassian paused in the entryway to the kitchen and watched as Nesta gathered Dahlia in her arms. “Is Daddy home, sweetheart?” she gently asked before turning to find him standing there.

From across the kitchen, he gave her an intense look of admiration. With a satisfied grin upon his face, he crossed his arms and leaned against the door frame.

He then gave the pot on the stove a pointed look before returning her gaze to her.

Nesta’s lips formed a subtle smile as she stared back at him and gave him the slightest nod.

They might not have been able to speak through each other’s minds yet, but he knew she could read his mind at that moment and confirmed that she indeed was offering him food. That she was ready. That she wanted to be his mate for life.

“I have a secret to tell you!” Dahlia exclaimed as she put her small hands against her mother’s face to force her to look at her.

Cassian leisurely walked up to them as he opened the very small pouch attached to his belt.

“What is it, Lia?” Nesta asked.

“Daddy wants to be an Archeron, just like us!” she shouted.

Cassian got down on both of his knees in front of them as Nesta turned her head to look at him again. Her eyes widened as he pulled out a small wooden box from the pouch at his waist and offered it to her.

He’d never had a last name before. And he’d never had anywhere where he felt like he truly belonged before, until the two girls before him entered his life.

Stunned at the sight in front of her, Nesta couldn’t take her eyes off of the box, even as she bent down to put Dahlia back on the floor. “Is that...the box you tried to give me at Winter Solstice years ago?”

Cassian nodded as Nesta took the box from his hands. Her hands trembled as she opened it to discover the necklace with the ruby that had belonged to his mother. The one that was in the hilt of his old Illyrian blade that Nesta had used to distract the king of Hybern.

Nesta just stared at it in bewilderment.

“But...you had thrown this in the Sidra. How did you…?”

“I had help from a fae from the Summer Court who had some water manipulation powers,” he explained.

“But the Summer Court hates you…” she said as her face contorted in confusion.

“A story for another time,” he stated with a cheeky grin, thinking of all he had to go through to convince the fae to help him. “But Nesta, my love, I love you more than words can say, and I -”

“I know,” Nesta breathed as tears formed in her eyes. “You don’t need to say anything, Cassian. I know how much you love me. Just as you know how much I love you.”

He took a shaky breath. “My love, I know it’s not a ring, but I hope you’ll still accept this as - ”

“Mommy! Can you pleaseee marry Daddy so he can become an Archeron?” Dahlia interjected as she impatientiently tugged on Nesta’s dress.

“Yes, of course I will,” Nesta whispered as her blue-gray eyes focused on Cassian. “And of course, I accept this necklace.”

Dahlia let out a scream of giddy delight as Cassian hurriedly got up off the ground to grab the necklace out of the box. Wrapping it around Nesta’s neck, he stood behind her as he linked it together, then placed a kiss at the nape of her neck.

As soon as he pulled back, Nesta immediately turned around to kiss him passionately.

“Now about my stew…” she said as she put her arms around his neck.

Cassian placed his arms at her waist. “Well, you do know what’s going to happen as soon as you give me that food and I eat it, right?”

The desire for her would be hard to control at that point...

Nesta nodded. “Which is why I asked Feyre to come over to pickup Lia in a little while so she can go play with her cousin,” she revealed.

“But I want to see Daddy become an Archeron, Mommy!” Dahlia piped in, tugging at Nesta’s dress.

“That will happen another day, my angel. We need time to plan it,” Nesta explained.

“Hmm,” Cassian remarked as he picked up Dahlia. “But maybe the three of us could spend time together first to celebrate? Then you can feed me later, my love.”

“Of course you had to go and upstage my food offering,” she teased with a smile, and Cassian’s free hand caressed her face. “But I’m glad you did. I’ll let Feyre know to come later.”

She gave him a quick kiss before she stepped away. 

Then Cassian looked over at Dahlia, who was beaming in his arms. “Daddy gets to marry Mommy,” he whispered excitedly to her. “Thank you for telling Mommy, sweetheart. I love you,” he said before kissing the top of her head.

“Love you too, Daddy,” she said before kissing his cheek.

_______________________________________________________________

Cassian ended up flying Dahlia and Nesta to a wooded area that he’d made into Dahlia’s play area, which included swings he’d crafted that hung from the trees, a mini cabin to serve as her own fort, a seesaw, and a variety of rocks she could paint (she recently received a set of paints as a gift from Feyre). It was an afternoon filled with fun and laughter, one that made Nesta incandescently happy.

The fact that Cassian would soon be both her mate and husband probably made the day feel even more special. She didn’t know he would ask her to marry him that day, but she suspected he’d been wanting to ask for a long time.

After Feyre had picked up Dahlia to spend the night in Velaris, Nesta went about reheating the stew she had made earlier that afternoon.

“Do you know why I chose to make you stew?” she questioned Cassian as she stood with her back to him and stirred the pot on the stove.

“Hmm,” Cassian began as he thought about the possible reason. “Wasn’t it the first dish I taught you how to make?”

“You remember,” Nesta noted with a smile.

“Of course I do,” he remarked as he came up behind her and snaked his arms around her waist.

Nesta grabbed a spoon and scooped some stew out of the pot. Holding up the spoonful of food, she twirled in Cassian’s arms to face him and present him with it.

Cassian looked curiously at the spoon for a minute before bringing his gaze back to Nesta. “Why now?” he wondered softly. “After all this time, why now?”

“Because I was tired of you trying to read my mind and always misunderstanding what I was thinking. Life would be easier if you really could read it,” she teased.

Cassian chuckled, but waiting for her to go on.

She took a deep breath. “Because the other day, I just...I was watching you read to Lia, and I didn’t know why I was waiting anymore,” she continued. “I think I finally realized that my love for you is greater than any desire to keep fighting off all these fae customs. I shouldn’t be spiting the bond. I should be thankful for it. That I’ll be able to live a long life with you. That I’ll have a lot of time with you.”

Cassian grinned and leaned down to kiss her.  “I love you.”

“I love you, too,” she replied as she reached her hand up to touch her necklace. “And now I ask you the same question. Why now?”

Cassian brought his hands up to her face and pushed away the stray strands of hair behind her ears. “Because I knew you were ready. I’ve been wanting to marry you probably since about two weeks after Dahlia was born. But I knew asking you then would’ve been too much and too fast for you after everything you’ve gone through. And I didn’t want to ask you until I knew you were ready. I didn’t want you to feel pressured to marry me if you knew it was what I’d been wanting. I wanted it to be your choice. So when Dahlia said you were making me food, I knew you were ready.”

“I’m sorry for taking so long,” she said quietly.

“You have nothing to be sorry for, my love,” he told her tenderly.

Nesta leaned forward to kiss him. “I’m shocked you haven’t started calling me ‘my mate.’”

“Well, I’m not too fond of that term. I prefer ‘my love’ because I love you by choice, not because of the bond.”

His words never failed to warm her heart.

“Well, my love, the future Cassian Archeron...” she began and she brought the spoon closer to his mouth.

“I love the sound of that,” he interjected, causing Nesta to smile even brighter.

“Do you accept the bond and accept this stew I have to offer you?”

“Yes,” Cassian emphasized, and Nesta placed the spoonful of stew in his mouth.

Cassian swallowed. “Delicious,” he commented before leaning in to plant his lips against her throat.

Nesta let the spoon clatter to the floor as she clutched at his tunic.

“Wait, Cassian,” she said, and Cassian instantly pulled away. “There’s something else that I’ve realized I want.”

“Anything.”

“I want…” she took a deep breath as her heart raced. She wasn’t terribly nervous about asking to be his mate earlier because she was confident he would accept. But this...she wasn’t sure how he’d react to this news at all. “I want another child.”

Cassian brought his hands to her upper arms and froze. “Do you really want another one, or are you just saying this because you think I want a child related to me by blood? Because I consider Dahlia to be mine, through and through. If you don’t want anymore kids, she is enough for me,” he insisted.

Nesta couldn’t help but fret over his response. Did he not want another child? Is that why he was reacting this way?

But she had to be honest with him. “I really do want another one,” she revealed. “You’ve been such a great father, and I’ve loved raising Dahlia with you. I want to raise another child with you. But only if you want one too…” she finished hesitantly.

“Oh, sweetheart,” Cassian stated as put his hands on her cheeks and his mouth spread into a wide grin. “Yes, despite your wild moods and cravings during pregnancy, of course I want to have another child with you,” he added before kissing her fiercely.

Pretty soon, his kisses were everywhere and she responded in kind. Stepping away from the stove, he lifted her off the ground and she encircled her legs around his waist as he supported her.

“Maybe this time we’ll have a boy,” Nesta expressed in between her deep breaths.

“And we can name him Cassian,” he added breathlessly as he tugged the ribbon out of her hair.

Nesta rolled her eyes as she ran her fingers through his hair. “I already have enough Cassians in my life.”

As Cassian walked her to the bedroom, he laughed against her lips.

And when he laid her down on the bed and their bodies eventually joined together, she could feel that power that had been pleading to be released for years explode with intense fervor between them.

I love you, my future wife, she heard in her mind.

I love you, my future husband, she replied through the bridge between their minds.

Even though the mating bond had been officially established between them, Nesta felt fully in control. With a soon-to-be husband who loved her unconditionally, a daughter whom she adored more than anything in this world, and her ability to love them fiercely and fearlessly, she finally felt...complete.

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A/N: Oh boy, this will be long. I can't believe this is the end!

So when I first started this story, I KNEWWW that writing multi-chapter fics would take over my life, so I decided "hey, okay we're going to try to keep this fic short by only doing about a chapter per month of the pregnancy." WELP, this fic went onto becoming the longest fic I've ever written.

And I couldn't have kept up with up with it, written as much as I did, and completed it if it weren't for you lovely readers! Every comment, every like, every request to be tagged has meant SO MUCH to me! Heck, even if you didn't do any of that and still read all this, it means a lot! THANK YOU SO MUCH!

If you did get through this whole enchilada, I've love to hear from you just so I can thank you personally! Even if it's the simplest of comments just saying you read this thing, I want to thank you! You can tell me what you liked and even what you didn't like. (You know what I don't like? I don't like that I didn't give Emerie more of a role as a friend to Nesta...it was my original intent to do that, but then my poor brain and poor typing fingers could only handle building up one relationship at a time and it had to be Nessian lol.)

Anyway, I don't think I've ever said that the title of this fic comes from the song "Shallow" from the movie, "A Star is Born." That movie's soundtrack really influenced me when I wrote my original outline for this fic. So thank you "A Star is Born"!

I am probably going to take a loooong break from writing Nessian. This fic was such a beast that I'm a bit exhausted! Plus, I only really like writing post-ACOFAS fics about them, and since I've been stuck in the headspace for this fic for so long, it's become my current headcannon, lol. It would be hard to write about anything where Nesta and Cassian do not have Dahlia!

Anyway, I hope you found this ending to be satisfying and that it made all the angst worth it! (oh man, I kinda really missed writing the angst though!)

TL;DR: LOVE YOU ALL! Thank you so much for reading and supporting me through this!!! ;)

#nessian #nesta #cassian #nesta cassian #nesta archeron #a court of thorns and roses #acotar #a court of mist and fury #acomaf #a court of wings and ruin #acowar #a court of frost and starlight #acofas #fanfiction #far from the shallow #wings and embers

[weuschoiceheart]

Stan OnlyOneOf ya cowards (Long Post - Dance & Song Analysis)

Woah....wow....just WOW

I just watched the 1theK dance mirrored video for OnlyOneOf’s “Savanna” (the one for the dance cover contest, and can I just say, W O W.

I remembered watching this last year (It was the very first video of OnlyOneOf I watched) and I was like, yeah, this song sounds pretty good. But now, after rewatching it, I’m amazed at the amount of imagery they put into the dance. By no means am I a pro dancer or something, but I’ve been dancing to Kpop for a few years now, so I got used to pretty much how the dances are like. Nowadays, most boy group dances are pretty hip-hop / popping / maybe some contemporary dance mixed in for some of the slower parts in songs, so I pretty much know what to expect. There would be some crazy choreo, fast paced tempo you need to follow, etc., etc. Yeah, 4th gen is starting to become some sort of dance competition.

But...THIS. THIS GODDAMN CHOREO SHOOKED ME. I already love how different OnlyOneOf’s songs are from the generic mainstream songs, instead of going for some hardcore rap or edm songs, they always go for mellow tunes and beautiful melodies mixed with entrancing vocals (YES YES YES VOCALS, THERE ARE ACTUALLY V O C A L S IN THEIR SONGS, NOT SOME SORT OF WEIRD NOISE INSTRUMENTAL. I CAN GO ON A WHOLE RANT ABOUT THEIR VOCALS). Anyways, I might make a whole other post for their songs, but right now, let’s focus on their choreography, specifically this one.

It’s strange, in a way. I got into OnlyOneOf because of the dance for “_Sage.” I saw it in a random play dance video, and it was my first time seeing OnlyOneOf in one of these videos, actually. I remembered seeing the dance and got shocked when they yeeted to the ground during Mill’s part in the chorus. Idk the name for the move, but it caught me offguard on how smoothly they did it. After the random play dance ended, I immediately went to watch their dance practice for “_Sage” and decided to learn the move, bc, you know, it looks cool (and I want my awkward self to show a different, cooler side of me on stage). I only wanted to just learn the chorus, but I ended up learning the whole choreo. And it literally started with “i just wanna learn their names so I can tell them apart during the dance” to finally “Ok, I’m gonna stan.”

“_Sage” has a pretty intense choreo, compared to their other songs, but I feel like, with OnlyOneOf’s choreos, you need to properly EXPRESS the song’s meaning. Ofc, it’s always important to convey the meaning of a song, since dance IS a form of art and expression (as a very smart Hwanwoong said, it’s not just about the performance, it’s whether you can convey the emotions well or not). 

With OnlyOneOf though, each of their song has a special meaning, all linked to a storyline (I’m probably gonna go on a whole other rant when I piece together the theories), and their songs are so different as well, they don’t talk about the topics that most groups today usually explore with their discography, instead going to a different route and just listening to their songs and watching them dance makes me feel like I’m in a different dimension.They’re just...UNIQUE. I don’t know any other way to say it. Y’all are probably like “how about Group X, they always talk about blah, blah, blah” and I am NOT dragging down other groups, but smth abt OnlyOneOf really stands out to me. I listened to their song “dOra Maar” this morning and got emotional after finding out the meaning behind the song. Even though I finished learning “_Sage” yesterday, I still feel like I need to practice more to make sure the emotions and meaning of the song is properly conveyed through the dance, bc the meaning behind “_Sage” is just so complex. And now, let’s actually go into the semi-analysis I did for “Savanna” so you guys will understand what I’m talking about.

THE ACTUAL ANALYSIS

Imagery is used by many groups today to give choreography a deeper meaning, or in some cases, like a signature move (SKZ “God’s Menu” uses many cooking references, for example). With “Savanna,” I was amazed by the amount of imagery they use. As I mentioned before, groups these days are more into difficult hiphop dances, so I feel like imagery is being used less and less and choreos are just a bunch of difficult moves strung together to look powerful and difficult and...yeah, 4th gen is really turning into a dance competition. Anyways, i DIGRESS ONCE AGAIN (I can complain for hours about 4th gen music and dancing but let’s save that for some other time).

I will say this again: I am NOT a professional dancer, I only had a few years of ballet + Kpop, and is self-learning popping and hiphop right now. This is only based on what I observe and how I interpret the dance.

Ok, let’s start at the beginning of the choreo. All the members form a ring around one member (KB) and waved their arms to enclose a circle, trapping him, before moving apart. Next, the members seemed to form a path for KB to walk on, with Yoojung and Junji at the end, arms forming a line that KB ducked under and passed through. Right off the bat, we have a beautiful imagery. I think it portrays time travel (since the song seems to hint towards that subject). The four members forming the path that KB walks on, are frozen like statues, like time just froze. KB is the person that wants to break out (he was trapped within a circle in the beginning) and seems to find a loophole through time that he manages to walk through.

Now, onto my favorite imagery for the choreo that really surprised me. At 0:33 in the video, When they formed lines by Nine’s side and opened their arms in sync, creating almost like an illusion. It might be to match the lyrics about “dry, chapped lips,” but that part mesmerized me, and drew me in to continue watching.

The next key point of imagery, is at 0:47, when they formed a line and stood in alternating positions, moving their arms in an alternating pattern as well. It really matches with the lyrics “among the intertwined people, I hide myself again” and creates another illusion that’s JUST. SO. CAPTIVATING. I might be a tad bit overdramatic abt this, but really, I LOVE LOVE LOVE how they put so much imagery and meaning into the choreo.

Another piece of imagery is Love’s and Nine’s solo portion after the chorus, when they mirrored each other with their bodies and made a drinking motion with their hands. Might seem small, but it emphasizes the lyrics “Watchin’ all your silhouette / Drink one more time, Sweepin’ huh.” The lyrics might not make sense, but this part is just so mysterious and mesmerizing.

They did another beautiful imagery for the start of the second prechorus for the same lyrics (”Among the intertwined people, I hide myself again”), but this time, forming a V formation around Nine. They also formed the same ring around Junji when he sang, “I feel like I’m locked in” but with some floorwork this time. I love how they tried variations of the moves, so the image is still there but switched up to keep it engaging.

These are the key details of the dance I’m going to write about here, there are many other parts and some imagery I probably missed, but if I’m going to actually analyze every single move along with the song lyrics, you guys are probably gonna get bored XD. So to wrap this up, I think the important factor about the dance that really draws me in is that, unlike choreos nowadays, the dance is composed of smooth movements and transitions, like contemporary but keeping that Kpop feel, ya know? The song itself is already mellow and vocal-centered, so ofc the dance has to match it, but I wasn’t ready for the imagery (i dare you to count the amount of times I used this word lol) they used. Watching this is like a breath of fresh air, listening to this song is so refreshing. I strongly recommend you guys check it out!

This is the longest post I ever wrote lmao, and if you read all the way to the end, congrats! Anyways, I might learn this after I polish up “_Sage.” Hmm....should I also do vocal covers for the songs too? I was actually thinking of remixing “Savanna” into a diss track because of the misheard lyrics (”i don’t give a shit what they think abt us / you’re like a bitch from Savanna”). Who knows?

Thank you for taking your time to read this!

#long post #onlyoneof #kpop #dance analysis #kpop choreo #kpop dance analysis #onlyoneof dance analysis #dance #choreography #onlyoneof kpop #junjun stuff #savanna #onlyoneof savanna #onlyoneof savanna choreo #onlyoneof savanna dance

[twdmusicboxmystery]

TWD 10x05: What It Always Is - First Thoughts

I originally started writing a ginormous post and the realized that I would need to break it into two: first thoughts and details. The bigger one, of course, will be Details, and I’ll post that on Tuesday. Today, I’m just going to give a few thoughts on broader arcs and, of course, the Donnie stuff.

***As always, spoilers abound below for 10x05. Don’t read until you’ve watched!!!***

There were five major sections here: the opening sequence with Kelly, Negan/Brandon, Aaron/Gamma/Alpha, Ezekiel, and Magna/Connie/Daryl.

Kelly/Opening Sequence:

The opening sequence with Kelly definitely has some TD symbolism in it, which I’ll get into more tomorrow. I was right that Kelly didn’t die here, but I do think this foreshadows something bigger down the road.

There’s all the Beth-ish symbolism, which suggests it may foreshadow something to do with Beth, or be a parallel to Beth in some way. But there’s also missing stuff that we didn’t see. I had to watch it more than once to catch this, but in the opening sequence, we see Kelly sit down against a boulder, and a walker reaches out for her.

When Daryl, Magna, and Connie find her, she’s sitting against a tree, and we don’t know what actually happened with that walker. The assumption is that she fought it off and kept running, falling down by the tree a little ways away. But still, there’s stuff there we didn’t actually witness, which I think is significant. I still think the walker reaching for her foreshadows her being taken by the Whisperers in some form.

Negan/Brandon:

So in terms of the arc, this definitely leads to Negan going to the Whisperers camp. That follows the CBs, and we figured this would happen. As I’ve said many times, I’m glad to see this because I think something about Negan’s arc here will lead to Beth.

The first thing we saw was Negan near some water. Brandon obviously idolizes Negan and keeps trying to be the perfect Savior to impress him. I think at least part of this, where Negan is concerned, had to do with him realizing he doesn’t want that way of life anymore. He likes TF’s way of life better. In the CBs, he goes to the Whisperers camp to prove his loyalty to Rick, and it seems to me like they’re doing something similar in the show. After Brandon kills Milo—who I think reminded Negan of Carl—he decides he wants to go back, but knows he won’t be welcome unless he proves his loyalty. So he’s off to the Whisperer camp.

And how about the school bus? It’s mostly GREEN with red and blue stripes on it.

They honestly focused way more on the kid, Milo, than on the Mom, Amelia. I had to sit and think about the bus symbol for a bit, though. I kind of realized that I don’t have a specific meaning for the bus. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve done several theories on school buses (X) and I know it’s related to Beth’s arc, or at least the death fake out arcs. But what does it specifically stand for? I’m not sure. Looking at how it’s functioned, this is what I came up with.

I thought it might stand for something that SHOULD have saved people, but didn’t. In 4a, lots of people left the prison on the bus when it went down. It was their escape plan. But they all died anyway. Similarly, in 5x05, Abraham and co were on the short bus, which should have carried them a ways safely, but it crashed.

You could also argue that someone who was SUPPOSED to die on the bus, didn’t. In S4, that would have been Glenn. Maggie left him on the bus and thought he was on it, but he got off and she didn’t realize. Similarly, as bad as the crash in 5x05 was, it’s kind of amazing no one died or even sustained serious injuries.

So what about this scene with Negan? I’m not sure. He saved Amelia and Milo, which means they should have lived. But Brandon killed them, and they died. So if anything, it’s kind of the opposite of what we’ve seen elsewhere. So I’m not entirely sure what to make of this yet. I know I say this a lot, but it will probably make more sense when we understand more of where Negan’s arc is going.

I’m wondering if he’ll somehow rescue Beth or some other kids from some kind of situation represented by the bus. He also made a big deal about how he would never kill a kid. That was partly to make him a foil to Brandon, who was obviously mildly homicidal. But I also think that’s a foreshadowing that we’ll see him protecting kids at some point in the future. We’ve already seen him save/protect Judith. I’ll we’ll see it again with either her or others So, I’ll keep an eye on this moving forward.

Aaron/Gamma/Alpha:

This actually starts with Aaron. He’s practicing his weaponry on a bridge, which is kind of interesting. He doesn’t fall off of it, so it’s not exactly foreshadowing a death fake out for him. But I think he’ll be taken from the community (represented by the bridge) in some way. At this part, we also saw a spiders web near him. (Yes, I know this pic is super blurry. I couldn’t get a decent shot of the spiders web. It went by too fast. The blur at the top left is the spider.)

I think I mentioned this before, but the spider is symbol for Alpha. Siddiq hallucinated a spider synonymously with reliving the be-headings in 10x01. He saw the spider and then saw Alpha in the barn with the machete. Since then, I’ve noticed spiders or spider’s webs several times just before something happened with the Whisperers.

So here, I would have said that Aaron would end up with the Whisperers at some point. Like, maybe this represented that they’d take him from his community. Well, we got confirmation before the end of the episode that at least Alpha wants to do this. She tells Gamma that Aaron might be useful. So I’ve said that I think some people will be taken captive and/or taken somewhere by Alpha. I’m mostly focused on Connie for that, which I’ll talk more about in a minute, but I’ve toyed with the idea of Aaron being involved. Mostly because Rick gave him Gracie in S8, which I think a foreshadow of something else.

Yeah, I think it’s safe to say he’ll be involved somehow. But I think all the associations are important here. Let’s talk about Gamma poisoning the water.

I said that the satellite falling represented Wormwood, which poisons all the water. So after it fell, the water would start being poisoned. And what do you know? Only a few episodes later, Gamma is trying to poison the water.

I honestly don’t know if this is the endgame for the “bad water” symbolism. Maybe, but it seems like kind of small potatoes, so it may only be one small portion of the symbolism. Or it may foreshadow something much bigger down the road.

But in terms of associations, we had Aaron seeing the poisoning happening, and then approach Gamma when she got hurt. That feels like a foreshadow of a much bigger arc for him that has to do with the poisoned water and the Whisperers.

Also, despite what she says, Gamma seems to be having some trouble processing her sister’s death. She’s having an almost Siddiq-like PTSD reaction to it now, which is how she hurt her hand to begin with.

In the Whisperer camp, we learn that they’re damning up the creek and trying to poison the water in order to crush TF. Again, I’m not convinced this is the endgame of the bad water stuff, but it’s interesting, and will definitely play into it.

Ezekiel:

Yeah, he has thyroid cancer. So all the theories about him being sick were true. But so was what we said: if he has cancer, maybe it can be treated with radiation. Guess what, guys? There’s basically not an easier cancer to treat than thyroid cancer. As they said in the episode, it has a 98% survival rate in our world. And that’s important. If they were just going to do a tragic death for him, because TF no longer has the medical resources in the apocalypse that they would have had in the old world, they wouldn’t be so heavily emphasizing that this type of cancer used to be survivable.

There are two major treatments for this type of cancer. Removal of the lump, and radiation. That’s pretty much it. And I’m sure most of you saw the spoilers this past week that TWD was filming in downtown Atlanta again, including filming people with white lab coats that looked a lot like doctors and even walkers wearing police uniforms. (Grady anyone?) So whether it’s actually Grady or just something very similar to them, I think our theories about Zeke’s cancer being treated with radiation are right on track.

Daryl/Connie/Magna:

Yeah, Magna is definitely spiraling. They had an interesting conversation between her and Yumiko. It sounds like Magna was in prison for killing someone who killed her cousin. Yumiko thought she didn’t actually do it, but Magna admitted that she did. Yeah, that’s kind of a problem. I’m sure the guy who killed her cousin deserved it, but it also shows that she’s willing to go vigilante if she feels she’s being treated unfairly, as also evidenced by her stealing supplies. So it will be interesting to see how this progresses, but I have a feeling we’re headed for catastrophe.

Next, on the Donnie stuff (or lack thereof). I’ve already addressed this somewhat, but I’ll say what I’ve already told my group and my fellow theorists.

I’m usually prepared for what small potatoes the Donnie or Caryl stuff is compared to what a big deal the shippers make about it. But this seemed more ridiculous to me than most other instances. Like, there was really, REALLY nothing there.

The scene everyone freaked out about where he told her the Merle story and clasped her hand? The thing I didn’t connect is that they weren’t even alone at that point. Magna was out with them, which the spoilers mentioned, but I just didn’t internalize it. So while Daryl is telling Connie that story, Magna is standing like ten feet away. She’s just not in the shot. (Okay, probably more than ten feet, but you get my meaning.)

There was definitely some Beth symbolism in there, which I’ll go over tomorrow. But I think something this clip is trying to show is how much more effectively Daryl interacts with people now. I noticed this and started thinking about it last week with Lydia. He’s been more touchy with everyone—Lydia, Michonne, Carol, of course—and obviously he’s not in love with all of them (which shows, by extension, that he’s not in love with any of them). While there’s obviously some huge symbolism and Beth vibes in this scene, I also feel like there are literal/plot take always here. Beth taught Daryl how to interact with people. Not only through touch but through sharing personal stories. There is a moment in this scene where Connie is upset and blaming herself and you see Daryl think about it for a minute before following her and launching into his story. I feel like he might have been thinking about Beth in that moment and how him telling her a story about Merle not only helped them connect but helped her feel better about her situation and stop blaming herself, so he did the same with Connie. And it worked. I also think it hearkens back to what Norman and the writers always say about Daryl’s feelings for Beth: that he didn’t understand them. By extension, he wouldn’t have had the first idea how to express them. I think this is the way they’re showing his emotional growth. So when Beth returns, he WILL recognize his own feelings and WILL be able to express them.

One more thing? Remember that every long term, soul mate couple we’ve seen on the show has done the intertwined fingers. The camera focused on him clasping Connie’s hand and they specifically DIDN’T intertwine their fingers. That’s as big and purposeful a statement as anything. This was their chance to foreshadow romance, and they very purposefully didn’t do it.

This is becoming a very close friendship, and I thought this scene was very sweet. It’s a healthy relationship—much like the one he has with Michonne, and far healthier than the one he has with Carol—but this scene specifically told us that’s it’s not heading in the romance direction. If it were, we would have seen a different kind of hand hold.

Then there’s the end scene. Connie apologizes to Daryl for asking him to lie for Magna (about her stealing the supplies). He shrugs it off and says, “Family, right?” She smiles and then points to him and then herself (You and me) and makes the sign for family as well. Then Daryl smiles. 

So it’s cute and sweet. But I think it’s important because, now that she’s said that, I think we all know Daryl would do anything for her. Just like Carol or Michonne or Aaron or anyone else, if something happens to her, or to anyone she cares about (such as Magna’s group) you know he’ll be right there to help. So they’re setting this up pretty much exactly as I thought they would.

(Notice that she doesn’t say, you and me, lovers! 😆) Also, Daryl leaves at the end. So once again he’ll be at Alexandria and she’ll be at Hilltop. Yeah, that’s what people who are in love and want to spend their lives together act. Okay, I’ll stop with the sarcasm.

My point is that this puts them squarely in the friend zone. This is what I mentioned the other day when I said the writers pretty much confirm this to be a familial, rather than romantic bond. I still think it’s possible that Connie harbors some feelings for Daryl, but this, combined with the lack of entwined fingers, means it will never be more than friendship.

I also want to point out that this entire conversation happened right next to Daryl’s motorcycle, which might be a foreshadow of something.  😉 (My theory about him and Carol leaving together on the motorcycle to find Connie.)

Okay, I’ll stop there for today. Details tomorrow!

#beth greene #beth greene lives #beth is alive #beth is coming #td theory #td theories #team delusional #team defiance #beth is almost here #bethyl