#the air of patheticness he has about him. how much he is going thru it at any given moment

[tyranitarkisser]

Meet my trolls! ~

Argia Therum (she/they/he) - 9 sweeps old - Megatherium lusus - Limeblood

Prospit - Doom - Scythekind

5imply filled with 5o much earne5t wonder and amazement for the world! =D creep5 out mo5t people becau5e they all 5eem to think they’re weird or faking it… the number 5 is very 5pecial to them but they arent 5ure why.

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Varke Scofra (he/him) - 9.5 sweeps old - Entelodon lusus - Bronzeblood

Prospit - Blood - Brassknucklekind

PRETENTIOUSLY POETIC ENERGY TO HIS WORDS – VERY CAREFULLY CRAFTED SELF IMAGE AND INCREDIBLY FRAGILE EGO – AVOIDS CRITICISM – COMPULSIVE LIAR AND BRAGGER – SELF ESTEEM IS ENTIRELY CARRIED BY WHETHER OR NOT PEOPLE BUY INTO HIS PERSONA

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Stima Megneu (he/him) - 8.5 Sweeps old - Meganeura lusus - Goldblood

Derse - Light - Plungerkind

=xtr=m=ly knowl=dgabl= about vid=o gam=s to th= d=trim=nt of =v=rything =ls=. v=ry quick to infodump at th= first opportunity about favorit= gam=s and poss=s=s n=ar =ncylcop=dic knowl=dg= about said gam=s. social skills ar= n=ar non=xist=nt. can b= v=ry irritabl= wh=n small d=tails are gott=n wrong

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Nodux Mengeu (he/him) 8.5 Sweeps old - Meganeura lusus - Goldblood

Prospit - Time - Macekind

v imp8ent shortns wrds no br8k btwn sntnces oftn skps vowels is pro speedrnner n wants 2 get thru evrythng quick as possble as precisly as possble. thnx of hmslf as 'cooler' brothr >B-)

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Ixeti Garman (he/him) 9 sweeps old - Anomalocariss lusus - Blueblood

Derse - Rage - Beautykind

has bad stutter and speaks softlly and meeklly as if he is connstanntly crying,, very pathetic and scared outwardlly but willl go out of his way to commit absollutely heinnous acts and will proceed to cry and cower whenn caught.. how cann you be mad at me right now??? >△< im lliterally crying i didnnt meann to killl those people,,,,,, (absolutely *did* mean to kill those people)

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Cerre Jonens (she/her) 9 sweeps old - Titanoboa lusus - Indigoblood

Prospit - Space - Bonekind

Very pasSsionate about Beforan wildlife. The “normal” one. IsS easily made uncomfortable >_> jusSt wantSs to talk about animalsS. HaSs sSnakey lisSp. ~>°)～～～～～～ < (HisSsSsSsS)

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Dophy Cetala (she/her) 9 sweeps old - Echovenator lusus - Violetblood

Derse - Mind - Spearkind

Types with a bit of a mystical air ^.^ Outwardly kind and warm but distant and mysterious. None of her friends know that she is the leader of an internet cult that's (mostly) harmless…

#homestuck #fantrolls #homestuck oc

[soaptaculart]

Been replaying the AA trilogy these past few weeks and I forgot how much AA1 Edgeworth is just the character of all time

#ace attorney #miles edgeworth #and friends #i drew something #i never thought of myself as a big edgeworth fan i really didn't. and i think there's no game where he's as good as in aa1 #but god in aa1 he's so funny. and also genuinely compelling obviously but mostly so funny #the air of patheticness he has about him. how much he is going thru it at any given moment #and i don't mean the trauma i just mean when ridiculous shit happens in court and he's like MRMPRRHHHHHH #love him for that SO much

[ceylon-writes]

December 10th -Shorter Wong

reader celebrates hanukkah with shorter!

I’m helping thelynxwriter with their Christmas prompts, so visit their blog to view the rest of the prompts. Also I tried my best to research the holiday so forgive me if something seems incorrect.

Warning, tiny bit smut, minuscule even.

When shorter walked through the door, the smell of bread was the last thing he expected to smell. He expected to see his lovely s/o sleeping on the couch or watching tv dutifully waiting for her lover to come home. Instead she was in the kitchen braiding bread while another loaf was baking in the oven.

“Babe? What you making?” Shorter walked over to y/n after taking his shoes off to wrap her in a hug, giving little kisses on her neck.

“I’m making challah” shorter looked confused at this response, “what for?” “Hanukkah of course” shorter knew that his lover was Jewish, but he didn’t know much about the religion, looking around the apartment, he noticed there was more decorations in the apartment beside all the Christmas decorations that were put up at the beginning of the month. One of these decorations was a candle with 7 candles all unlit. Walking over to the candle holder he examined it. “What’s this thing?”

Y/n stopped her braiding to look over at what shorter was talking about, “that’s the menorah, we light the first candle at sunset, I’ll also teach you how to play games with the dredial” shorter bounced up in excitement at the mention of games. He loved playing games with his baby. But right now he realized that his love never told him welcome back or gave him a hello kiss, does she not love him anymore? Is she cheating on him with someone else? But how? She hasn’t left the apartment at all. Shorter stewed in his thoughts, spiraling down slowly at the thought of his baby cheating on him with some pathetic excuse of a human who dare touch his y/n. He had an intense look on his face, one that y/n knew all too well, she has to go over there and give him affection before she ends up stuck giving him affection to sate his raging anger and prevent him from going out and killing some poor guy. Walking over she wrapped her arms around him and gave him little kisses on his face. This pulled shorter out of his mind, but before he could ask one of the many questions he asked before anytime y/n didn’t show him affection in time. She interrupted with a simple question.

“I love you, you know that right?” This threw shorter for a loop, of course he knew she loved him! Who else would she love but him? Only he gets her love no one else. He will kill them if they try to take her love.

Y/n was losing him again. Sighing she started running her fingers thru his purpled colored Mohawk. She kissed him slowly, shorter eventually recouperated the kiss slowly, pulling her closer by her hips, making the kiss deeper. Y/n had to pull away now or she’ll be stuck sucking face with him and nothing will get done. With a gasp of air she pulled away, shorter tried to get her back into the little makeout session but was stopped by a finger held to his lips.

“I love you” shorter had a slight dazed off look in his eyes, so when he heard those words he put on this dopey smile, you could practically see hearts in his eyes as if he looked like he was high off of love from a simple kiss. “I love you too.” He responded.

“You wanna help me finish making the challah?” Shorter nodded his head and followed you to the kitchen.

After an couple of hours of making challah and latkes with some difficulty with a clingy shorter, The food was finished. Y/n wiped the sweat off her forehead with a smile after taking the final batch of challah out the oven. Shorter leaned on the counter happily munching on a latke. After a while of working he started whining that he was hungry. You didn’t want him to eat all the food since you wanted to mail some food to close family members. So you allowed him to have a latke as a snack. The sun has finally set to light the first candle of the menorah. You went over to the menorah and lit the shamash before taking the shamash to light the first candle of hannukah. You said the traditional prayer before turning back to shorter who was still quietly munching on his snack.

“Wanna play the game?” Shorter nodded his head and sat down at the table with a pot full of chocolate coins and a dreidel. You explained the rules of the game to him and asked if he had any questions. “Can we make the game more interesting? Like if one of us wins the loser owes the winner a favor.” You got intrigued at the idea, you nodded your head and asked him what his favor is if you lost.

“I want a baby”

“Shorter no, that’s too expensive.”

“Baby please! We can afford it, plus imagine how cute our child would look with your looks.”

“I said we can have one when we older.”

“That was a year ago, we older now! Just please one night you skip taking the pill and we see what happens. If you don’t get pregnant I’ll stop bothering you about having kids now and wait till we older.” You thought about it a bit. It’s not like you want kids with shorter, you really do desperately, but your logical side says that it’s to expensive to care for a child, plus barely any room in the apartment. And shorter risking his life every night. You felt shorter gently grab your hand, you looked down to notice he was kneeling. “Honey please, I promise I’ll be a good father, we’ll be a perfect lil family. Please grant me this wish just once please.” Shorter was now by you on his knees with your hands clasped In his, puppy dog eyes glance up at you, begging you to take the risk. You sigh and mutter a fine.

Shorter smiled so wide you would have thought his face would split in half, with a loud whoop he picked you up abd spun you around in circles before setting you down, grasping you tightly, he was breathing heavy, from the spinning or the excitement you weren’t sure. But after a few too long minutes of hugging you while mumbling about something he pulled away, the look in his eyes slightly scared you. With the wide grin And the very tousled hair, his eyes showed love, but also some possiveness and insanity. It felt like you signed your freedom away in that moment.

Y’all played the game for a few rounds, and after a grueling last round, the tie was broken and shorter was the winner.

After an eventful night, you handed shorter a positive pregnancy test a month later.

#yandere #yandere!shorter #thelynxwriter25daysofchristmas #slight smut #banana fish shorter x reader #banana fish shorter #banana fish x reader #banana fish #shorter wong

[honeytea8]

So, discord was too hype this fine evening, and my lovely JoJo compatriots got me going on this crackship.

(If you ship a crack pairing and you KNOW it’s a crack pairing, this ones for you lmao! Live your dreams, boys 🤠 this is fanfiction)

Yeah, so here’s my little AbbaMis scenario raw and unedited. All I ask is that you humor me for a sec 😂 

Okay so boom: let’s say it’s some time post-series and everyone lives, yay right? Wrong! Because Abbacchio is still stuck pining after Bruno and you know what Bruno does? This dude gets MARRIED! The ship has sailed and Abbacchio never got on it. He can’t be upset because, he loves Bruno for real so if his old Capo is happy then Abba is too (insert air-quotes). He considers skipping the wedding but Mista won’t let him. The two have formed this weird friendship thing since Bruno is no longer affiliated with the mafia. Mista has assumed the role of helping Abbacchio stay afloat given the circumstances.

Abbacchio manages to suffer thru the wedding (he vomits only once so he calls it a win). All the festivities happen and it’s over. Abbacchio is hurting bro, like he’s losing sleep, can’t eat or function. He’s actually LOVESICK! Fast forward some months and he and Mista are on a mission. They’re staking out some building (a rival gang’s HQ, idk lmao).

It’s midnight, they’re both sitting in the car, nothings happening. But you know how Mista gets, this dude loves to have random conversations. So somehow (by magic probably) Mista gets Abbacchio to talk about his high school days. About how he used to wear dark, grunge makeup and lipstick, etc. They talk about the stupid shit they did as youth and eventually they fall on the topic of love.

It ain’t no secret that Abbacchio loved (loves?) Bruno. Mista knows this and tries to get him to open up. (I have this theory that Mista’s silliness makes it easy for ppl to confide and talk to him). Abba opens up and actually breaks down crying. Like smeared mascara, bleeding eye liner. He says one thing that nearly breaks Mista in two.

“I fell so in love with him. And I-I fucking thought he would catch me, but he didn’t.”

Mista pulls him in for a hug, because that’s all he knows how to do. When Fugo is having a hard time, when Narancia’s going thru shit, even Giorno on a rare occasion, Mista will come thru with the hugs!!! So he’s petting Abbacchio’s hair (the hat falls off lmao). And Abba is just sobbing into his sweater, nearly drenching the thing. Mista starts to worry because, humans shouldn’t be able to produce this many tears, right? But then he remembers that this is YEARS of stockpiled pain, regret, and self-loathing.

Suddenly Abbacchio shoves him off. He’s wiping at his face, which is a whole red (makeup-smeared) mess by now. Mista just levels him with a look, like stop building these walls around you, bro, you’re trapped!

“You judging me now, Mista?” Abbacchio sneers, but if anything he looks like a cornered animal.

“Dude, of course not. I would never...”

Mista scrubs his head with his nails, through his beanie before pulling it off an fanning himself with it (car ain’t got no AC).

Abbacchio is silent, brooding and put out but mostly regretting his outburst. He’s thinking ‘Fuck, this is pathetic, even for me’

Thankfully, they don’t bring it back up. They don’t talk about it but neither of them really forget. So it just sits in the back of both of their minds. Simmering and building up to... something, but they don’t know what. It’s a door that’s been kicked wide open and they can’t shut it.

To cut a very long and convoluted story short: They all share a house (in this stupid scenario) and it’s a rare chance where only the two of them are home. Mista eats dinner and promptly conks out. He swears only five minutes pass before there’s a knock at his door. Glancing at his clock, he sees it’s been about two hours and it’s thundering like crazy outside so much that it’s rattling against his window.

He stumbles to open the door, it’s Abbacchio. But not just that, this is Abbacchio bare-faced and au natural. No heavy makeup or dark lipstick. Just him and his little freckles, ash white eyebrows, and pink lips.

“You gonna let me in, or are you just gonna stare at me like a zoo animal?” Abbacchio mumbles.

Mista snorts and steps aside so Abbacchio can come in. He’s still half asleep and he’s not even sure this is real or not lmao. It’s only when Abbacchio takes a seat on his bed that he realizes that he is awake and this is actually happening. Mista suddenly remembers he’s only in his boxers so now he feels a bit self conscious. Abbacchio isn’t staring or anything—but it’s still weird as hell.

“Was there...something you needed?” Mista yawns. Abbacchio doesn’t reply but he’s doing that thing where he expects Mista to just figure it out.

But it’s like 2am, and raining, and he honestly doesn’t have the patience to just wait and see what happens.

Mista nudges Abba aside and pulls back the covers, “Alright, get in.”

Abbacchio wants to argue, his face says it all, but he really doesn’t want to be alone right now so he complies. Mista gets in after him and you know what this guy does? BIG SPOON! To him, it’s the same as hugging and hugging has worked all this time so what’s the problem?

He snakes his arms around Abbacchio’s waist and pulls him in. Even tucks his chin on his shoulder.

“Comfortable?” Mista asks.

“Y-Yeah...”

For a split second, Abbacchio closes his eyes and imagines its someone else holding him like this. That it’s someone else holding him like they actually want him rather than letting him fall hopelessly in love just to abandon him.

Doing this to Mista isn’t fair. Mista isn’t a replacement, but a friend. A loyal one who’s been there literally every step of the way. 

In a lapse in judgement, he brings Mista’s hand to his lips and kisses it. Mumbling a ‘thank you’ against his wrist.

(And the rest is n/sfw...lmfao, so yeah... yay, for crack! We love to see it 💓)

#jojo #jjba #jojo's bizarre adventure #crackship #abbamis #misabba #vento aureo #guido mista #leone abbacchio #it's cracktastic #honeychatter

[lady-divine-writes]

Resolutions

Summary: While writing up his own resolutions, Crowley decides to helpfully write up a list for his husband. (1472 words)

Notes: Written for @drawlight's '31 Days of Ineffables' prompts 'glitter' and 'resolution'.

Read on AO3.

Walking through his shop, returning the daily herd of wandering books to their correct shelves, Aziraphale comes upon a sight he’s never witnessed.

Not in the flesh.

Not once.

And not one he ever thought he’d see no matter how long he lived.

Crowley writing – at Aziraphale’s desk, of all places.

Aziraphale has received notes from Crowley before: requests for an audience to discuss their Arrangement, reminders of the temptations Aziraphale agreed to perform, reports on the blessings Crowley had done, taunting letters during the times in between when Crowley simply felt like nagging him. Dirty limericks scrawled in a sloppy hand on oil-stained parchment would occasionally pop up out of nowhere in his pocket. Nowadays, notes from Crowley are mainly reminders to pick up more wine or chocolate biscuits when Aziraphale goes to the market.

Aziraphale has simply never seen Crowley in action.

He figured Crowley miracles up his memos the way he miracles up everything else. No need to actually set pen to paper when a simple snap of his fingers will do the trick.

Writing seems like too tedious a chore to be worthy of Crowley’s precious time.

Aziraphale smirks as he watches him, planted in his stiff, antique chair; the bottom half of his body rearranged in that liquid way Crowley sits, but still as if it’s the most natural thing in the world.

As if the desk is his which, even though they’re married and pretty much sharing everything they own at this point, kind of irks Aziraphale. Yes, Aziraphale lives at Crowley’s flat, sleeps in his bed, and eats at his kitchen table, but he would never presume to grab the keys to his Bentley and take it for a spin.

That would be unforgiveable.

Aziraphale ranks this the same.

But he takes a deep breath in and lets it go. He’s never told Crowley his feelings on the matter, never expressed any emotional connection to his desk. Crowley probably sees it as simply another piece of furniture in this “residence” that they share and therefore had no reservations about sitting at it.

Which is kind of nice when Aziraphale comes to think about it.

Nevertheless, he’ll set him right about the whole situation later.

“What has you so busy, my dear?” he asks since it sounds kinder and less confrontational than, ‘What the Heaven are you doing at my desk?’ A glance at the wall calendar adds a level to Aziraphale’s questioning. It’s December 31st. New Year’s Eve. “Working on your resolutions?”

“Sort of,” Crowley admits, the words coming out in a drawl as he says them over the sentence he’s writing. When he finishes, he picks up the page and hands it over.

Aziraphale takes it, curiosity piqued. “What is this?”

“I was writing a list of resolutions – just for fun, mind you. But then, something hit me, and I started this one … for you.”

Aziraphale’s left eyebrow crawls up his forehead towards his hairline as he reads. “You’ve written up a numbered list of my flaws?”

“No. I’ve written up a numbered list of things you think are your flaws, aided by a list you apparently started, and based off some horrible Post-Its from Gabriel I found in your top drawer while searching for a pen.” Crowley growls the end of it, an angry hiss consuming his s’s, a lick of fire warming the yellow of his eyes.

“Yes, well, we’re overdue to have a talk about boundaries, my dear,” Aziraphale sniffs, scanning through the list numerous times, his posture becoming more rigid with every read thru. “I don’t see anywhere on this list where it says fraternizing with a demon.”

Crowley grins. “That’s because I know, deep down, you don’t see that as a flaw.”

Aziraphale rolls his eyes but he doesn’t contradict. “So, what am I supposed to do with this, hmm? Are these the things you want me to work on in the coming New Year?”

“Nope. Not a whit. I’m not asking you to change a thing about yourself.”

“Then what do I do with this?”

“You tear it into tiny pieces and set it on fire.”

Aziraphale frowns. “I may be wrong, but I don’t think that’s how New Year’s resolutions are supposed to work.”

“You do know New Year’s resolutions are shit, don’t you?” Crowley asks. “They’re completely unnecessary, especially considering that time itself is a made-up construct. I mean, you do remember when we had ten months in a year and not twelve, right?”

Aziraphale bounces his head left and right, agreeing more in spirit than in word.

“There’s nothing about the so-called beginning of the year that warrants beating yourself up over stuff you didn’t accomplish the last time the Earth revolved around the sun. Besides, I think Hastur came up with the concept.”

“It was Gabriel actually.”

Crowley nods. “Makes sense. Seems like the sort of plague his uptight, micro-managing ass would inflict upon the world.”

Aziraphale doesn’t comment, but silently, he agrees.

“So whaddya say? Tear it up? Rid yourself of the bullshit? You know you want to …” Crowley mimics ripping the page in the air in front of him on the off chance Aziraphale may not be familiar with the concept.

Aziraphale looks over the list, reading through the items he’d started writing, bleeding into the ones Crowley added.

Well, Gabriel added. They were simply copied in Crowley’s handwriting.

Un-angelic consumption of mortal food resulting in a slovenly appearance and an unseemly gut.

Slovenly. Aziraphale grimaces. So maybe he carries a few more pounds around the middle than most angels. But that doesn’t make him slovenly.

Un-angelic obsession with mortal material possessions.

Aziraphale scoffs. Hypocrite.

Un-angelic collection of defiled copies of the Holy Bible.

Un-angelic consumption of alcohol to the point of drunkenness.

Un-angelic this …

Un-angelic that …

Un-angelic bull pucky!

And Aziraphale knows that somewhere in his mess of Post-Its, Gabriel commented on the company Aziraphale keeps, specifically mentioning his un-angelic association with an ex-anti-Christ, a witch, a medium, and a demon, but Crowley either didn’t find it or chose not to include it.

Every criticism Gabriel has about Aziraphale begins with the modifier un-angelic. Which means Heaven – or at the very least Gabriel – considers Aziraphale un-angelic.

A pathetic excuse for an angel.

If Aziraphale were a demon, would this be seen as a list of flaws?

Would they matter at all?

Perhaps there wouldn’t even be a list if these are the only things “wrong” with him.

That’s definitely something Aziraphale may want to consider.

He glances at his husband grinning up at him with excitement. Every opportunity Aziraphale has to triumph over Heaven excites Crowley. But Aziraphale has paused so long, worry has started to settle in the corners of Crowley’s eyes. Aziraphale has been pushed down so far by Heaven, sometimes Crowley fears he won’t find the strength to stand again.

But he does.

Always has.

Stands back up and keeps on keeping on, still doing the things he loves, which makes it all the better.

Aziraphale doesn’t need Heaven and their insults.

He has Crowley’s love.

Aziraphale turns the list on its side, pinches it at the edge, and tears it down the middle.

Crowley whisper-chants, “Go! Go! Go! Go!” when Aziraphale slows down, encouraging him to continue.

And continue he does – tearing and turning and tearing and turning – until small squares of torn paper fill his cupped hands, the list unreadable except for a few individual words.

“There.” Crowley glows proudly at his husband. “How did that feel?”

“Good,” Aziraphale admits. “But this is going to feel better.” He tosses the scraps in the air. He doesn’t set them alight. He doesn’t want to trigger his sweet, supportive husband. Instead, with a snap, he turns them into glitter – harmless specks of gold and silver falling through the air and disintegrating where they touch.

“Beautiful,” Crowley says, slow clapping. He puts a gentle hand on his husband’s elbow and pulls him into his lap. “Positively gorgeous.”

“Thank you, my dear.” Aziraphale rests an arm on his demon’s shoulders. “I try my best. By the way, what did your list of resolutions have on it?”

“Oh.” Crowley reaches for the breast pocket of his jacket, but before his hand slips inside, he miracles the page into his grasp. “Read it for yourself.”

Aziraphale snatches it, more eager to read Crowley’s list of perceived flaws than his own. Except … “Darling?”

“Yes?”

Aziraphale flips the page front to back. “There’s nothing on this.”

“Of course there’s nothing on it! Can’t much improve on perfection, can you?”

Aziraphale studies the smug expression on Crowley’s face, his eyebrows bouncing over his yellow eyes, challenging Aziraphale to disagree.

Aziraphale shakes his head and leans in to give his ridiculous serpent a kiss on the cheek.

“Whatever you say, dear.”

#Good Omens #good omens fanfiction #ineffable husbands #31 days of ineffables #crowley x aziraphale #aziraphale x crowley #Frankie writes

[thotsforvillainrights]

*pulls up to the drive thru* let me get 🤔 some headcanons for ummm Toya where he runs into his ex with his new s/o. That’ll be all 😊

You want that uuuuuhhh boneless, with a baked potato on the side? Drive around to the first window please. Okay, I'll stop now😂😂😂

~Toya sees his ex~

headcanon|scenario|imagine|match-up

-Alright (My poor trash husband, noooo😭). Alright, so pictures this: You have gotten into a relationship with Toya and have been working hard to hold it up for 2 and a half years we'll say. So finally when you hit the 3 year mark, he's finally healed up from his mental damage and trust issues left by his ex. Toya is finally a fully new man! He's happier with you 100%, and has even mentioned starting a family and getting married down the line💗

-Alright, you two move back to the part of the city he used to live in a few years back because the real estate there is amazing and it's the perfect place for a family.

it's your usual date night and you two wanted to get out of the house to take a break from all that stressful unpacking! Setsuno suggest a little cafe nearby a bike shop and he even wants to visit a night garden afterwards as well. You agree and put on your casual/comfy/cutest outfit. You two leave out for the day and make it to the cafe. After dinner, you guys are leaving and boom! It's like he's frozen suddenly!

-"Toya? Toya what's wrong baby? Hey what...oh." Your vision follows his and there you see some woman standing next to a fairly muscular man. She appears to be well off with money as well. You would just think she was some rich lady off of the streets had it not been for your boyfriend's reaction. You knew only two people could make Toya freeze in his tracks. 1 is his mother after he pisses her off, and 2 is...

-"Your ex." You ask him quietly. He seems to snap out of it and switch to a stern frown while nodding at you. "Why Setsuno, is that you?! My how you've changed! I love what you're doing with your hair these days! Who is that? Is it a friend or coworker or something?" His ex spoke as if nothing was wrong. You decide to cut into the conversation before Toya says something very rude. Besides...that was your job.

-"No, I'm his girlfriend of 3 years now. Who are you? His fan or something?" You said with a fake smile on your face. The smile was there, but the venom in your voice was apparent. "Hmph." She scoffed before lifting her nose to the air. "3 years with him? Wooooow, I wasnt aware he could keep a relationship going that long with the type of man he is. He's pathetic and honestly that's why I couldn't bear staying with him." She said with a smirk. You looked at Toya but his vision was trained to the ground. His hair covered his face like usual but you could still see the tears welling up in his eyes.

-"You couldn't bear staying with him?! You robbed him and cheated on him!!! If I were you, I wouldn't be in the position to say anything about someone being pathetic. Now why dont you take that botched plastic surgery nose of yours, and that busted can of biscuits next to you, and get the fuck out of our face before I split your shit."

-By then she had gasped in shocked and grumbled while stomping away. She also pulled the muscled man beside her too. When they were gone you looked up to see Setsuno finally letting it out. "Pathetic...she's right you know." He sniffled. "TOYA NO! Do not take anything she said to you seriously. You and I both know that's not true baby! I love you so much and I'm so glad to be with you so don't be concerned with her at all. Besides, anybody that cheats is the real definition of pathetic. So let's forget about her and finish this date together, okay?"

-This time it had only taken a day or two to get him back to himself again. You're his biggest support, and he's already planning how he'll propose to you soon. Within a few days he had already forgotten about his ex again.

#setsuno toya #toya setsuno x reader #toya setsuno #shie hassaikai #yakuza #eight precepts of death #eight bullets #eightfold cleansers #eight expendables #bnha #mha #boku no hero academia #my hero academia

[professor-maka]

#14 pls! :D “I come to the library every day to ‘study’ but really I’m just watching Netflix over your shoulder and I’m really invested in this series and the day we’re supposed to be watching the season finale you’re not there and I??? Feel personally betrayed??”

Ask and you shall receive. ❤️ I hope you like!

Thanks to @sahdah and @macabremermaid for the eyes.

—

“HBO and Chill”

She can’t afford HBO, not making her own way through school, so Maka had never really worried what shows it airs. Why pine for what you can’t afford?

But then, he’d changed all that, the white haired kid who goes to the library to study every Sunday night, like clockwork. Sometimes he comes at 6, and sometimes he rolls in at 8,but he’s always there, just like her. But unlike her, he always takes a break to stream on his laptop.

The first night, Maka had been pissed—sure it isn’t a quiet study floor, but who streams in thelibrary without headphones? She’d been fuming but also curious. Game of Thrones? She’d read the books—had wished she could watch the series—but alas!

Fuming gave way to interest, and instead of confronting him like she thought about during the first 15 minutes, Maka had found herself watching over his shoulder as hequeued up two more episodes that night, and, reading abandoned for the evening, she found herself wondering when the hell she was going to get to watch more.

Maka had been damn near lowering herself to ask her shithead papa for the gift of HBO, sulking in the library as she did her reading and itched for more in the saga of Starks andLannisters, when her thoughts were interrupted by the sounds of someone moving in to occupy the table in front of hers, the same table she claims every Sunday. She nearly gasped when she realized it was him again, the white hairedboy from the previous Sunday, the one with HBO, the same one she’d seen around campus and in the back of a few of her classes, silent as as stone.

Maybe he’d watch again, she thought. She hoped. Although, Maka reminded herself, he’d surely be ahead by now and she has always hated skipping episodes. Disappointment hadflooded her as she poked her nose back into her book and there was nothing but yawning quiet, the scratch of her pen, the click of his keys. And then, she heard it. The theme song! And it was… the next episode!

She barely pretended to read that time as he watched three more episodes straight.

That had been months ago, early in the semester, and now, the semester is nearly at an end and so is the series and she can’t wait! Because by some miracle, he clearly only watches at the library on Sunday nights, right when she’s there to see it, and Maka has become invested.

The finale is tonightand she isn’t even pretending to study, she’s so wound. She needs to know what happens. The show has far outpaced the books and waiting is torture,but Maka knows he’ll be here by 9 to livestream like he has been for weeks.Well, maybe she should at least make a stab at studying. Sure she’s got As sofar in her classes, but finals still matter.

Nine o’clock hits and he’s not there. He’s never not there, not all semester, so where is he?

Ten PM hits and she’s inthe first stage of grief, mourning the loss of her livestream. But surely he’llshow and stream, even if it’s a little late. Eleven hits and with it comes the anger. Why now? Why tonight? How dare he string her along through 8 seasons only to deny her the finale!

Fists clenched, Maka makes a decision. Maybe not the most rational decision, but she’s more than a little desperate. Apparently, laptop boy is friends with Blake—she knows because she’d seen them playing one on one together as she passed the courts afew times—so she can find out where he lives or his number or something and—and—

Well, she doesn’t know, but desperate times, desperate, desperate times.

Clicking Blake’s speed dial on her cell, Maka rolls her eyes at his answers of, “Yo, this is your godspeaking, whatcha want?” That being a god brother makes him her actual god ishis personal joke; only he finds it funny.

“I need—a favor.” She sounds more sheepish than she means to, feels silly, almost hangs up, but—

“Sure, shoot, anything for my favorite minion.”

“Uh, so, eh—“ she stammers through his guffaw at her inability to spit it the fuck outalready. But she’s Maka Albarn and if she’s anything, she’s brave, so she pushes on. “That, uh, weird kid with the white hair you play basketball with—“

“Who, Eater? What, you got a thing for him or—“

“Nooo, he just—wait, his name is Eater?”

The guffaw is louder this time. “Nah, not his name name, it’s just what I like to call my newest minion, keep up.”

“And I thought BlackStar was bad,” she mutters, face flaming. Eater. Knowing Blake, she tells herself she doesn’t want to know.  

“Yeah, whatever, anyway, Maks, what do you want with my boy Soul? Never pegged you for being into the emo type but, like, no judgement.”

Well, Soul isn’t so bad a name. She finds she likes it. Much better than Eater, anyway.

“I’m not into anyone.” She manages not to snap even if she’s seething in mortification. “He—uh—forgot something at the library and I wanted to try to get ahold of him to—“

“Yeah, yeah, alright,I’ll text you his contact, gotta go, they set up the beer pong table, laterloser.”

Black Star will be BlackStar. At least he texts her the contact, and of course it’s under Eater. Figures, but whatever, she just needs to find out why the hell he ditched her.

She’s already pressed to call and let it ring several times when she realizes all at once she has absolutely zero business bothering him. Because, sure, he’d strung her along like a kitten with a string, laying out all 8 seasons before her like a buffet of medieval shenanigans, but it’s not like he’d done it on purpose.

The end call button gets pushed so fast it might have been the key to stopping the apocalypse. Really, it sort of is. Maka drops her phone on the table like a hot potato and lets the shame wash over her—how could she let sensationalized, bawdy medieval television get such a grip on her?

Her phone vibrates and she scoops it up, craving a distraction from her own silliness.

uh do i no u —the text reads.

No, he certainly doesn’t. Maka has no idea what to do but she can’t not answer, it would be rude, so she types back:

Not really. Blake gaveme your number.

ummm okay why — he responds after a pause.

Why? She can’t exactly tell the truth but she doesn’t like lying, either.

I was worried when you didn’t show up at the library. You’re always there on Sundays at the table infront of mine. Sorry.

It’s the truth, just not all of it. Because she does feel like they’ve bonded over Game ofThrones watching it together every week, and she’s overheard phone calls with his parents and his brother and she’s gotten to know quite a lot about him. Gods, she feels like a stalker, but— but—! He’d invaded her library time, not the other way around! And he’s the one who breaks rules to talk on his cell—he’s lucky she hasn’t reported him! And—

The vibration startles her out of her spiral.

maka shit im sorry im sick running 104 was gonna go set my alarm but slept thru its the finale im sorry gimme a sec ill b there

What. The hell.

He knows her name? And that she’s been watching? And—he’s sick—and—

Don’t you move! 104 is dangerous where do you live? I’ll be right there.

Even as she thoughtlessly hits send she regrets it because what is she doing? He’s going to block her or ignore her or tell her to fuck off, or what if he’s theone who’s actually a stalker—

Vibration. It’s an address, for an apartment complex next to campus.

Be right there. Her fingers send it out before she can even think—he knows her name, he sent her his address, maybe he’s a stalker serial killer?

But she’d called him. Also like a stalker. So it makes no sense and what even is she doing with her life?

For about half a second, Maka considers blocking his number and going home, never to enter the library on a Sunday night again. But he’s running a 104 fever; he might need help!And—she’s not a coward and she’s fully capable of kicking ass if she must. AND—the Game of Thrones finale is at his beck and call.

That’s the clincher, so she packs her things and makes her way across campus. It’s nearly midnight, so Maka keeps to well lit walks, and it isn’t long before she’s at his door. She knocks and hears coughing and shuffling and then he’s opening the door, looking bedraggled in plaid pajama pants and a ratty band tee, dark smudges under his eyes, his pale hair sticking up every which way. Well, the last part isn’t sofar off from his normal, anyway, but he looks sort of pathetic with his fuzzy blue blanket over his shoulders. Endearingly so.

“Uh, so,” she says, fidgeting with the strap of her bag on her shoulder and looking at his mouth to avoid his eyes.

“You can—uh—come in.” He sounds nervous even past the unusual scratchiness of his voice, but steps back, so she steps in. He closes the door behind her and she notices he’s got a nest of blankets on his big leather couch. She’s pretty sure she can hear an episode of Chopped somewhere in the background.

“Lay down.” Maka finally takes charge, tired of them both standing so awkwardly. “You have tea?”.

He just blinks at her for a minute, shakes his head, then looks between the couch and the kitchen. “Uh, sure, I can make—“

“Nooo!” she cuts himoff. “For you. I’ll make it.”

“Maka, you don’t have to—“ it’s the first time she’s ever heard him say her name and it startles her, especially because she sort of likes it.

“I know, but I want to.Help, I mean. So lay down.” She doesn’t give him the chance to protest, just walks into his kitchen and begins opening cabinets.

“Furthest cabinet on the left,” she hears his voice call out from the living room. “Cups in the dishwasher.”

She finds the tea (loose leaf! She doesn’t expect that!) and cups and sets the electric kettle on the counter below the tea cabinet to boil.

Several minutes later,she’s got two steaming cups of green tea with an herbal blend, and she walks them out to the living room. Soul has neatened the couch and is sitting up, leaving room on the other side. His eyes are closed and he’s snoring softly. Poor boy looks pathetic, flushed and droopy. Maka sets down a tea cup on the coffee table in front of him, sets the second on the other side, and sits across from him on the couch. She means to let him rest but it’s so awkwardsitting with a sleeping not quite stranger that she clears her throat nervously.

Startling awake, he looks at her, blinks, then seems to recall the situation,

“Uh. So. Wanna watch the finale?”

It’s at least half of why she’s here, so she nods, still feeling awkward and out of place, yet absolutely determined.

They end up commenting to each other through the episode and it’s nice. Why haven’t they ever watched it together like this? Not just Maka spying and pretending not to, but actually just—together? She could have asked and sat with him but she’s been silly.

It’s a regret, but as the episode ends, they’re both too full of feelings and ideas for it to last, and they talk about the finale and the series for a good hour before she stifles a yawn and he lets out a huge sneeze and she remembers who he is and where they are.

“So um—thanks for letting me come watch.”  She’s fidgeting again, this time with the hem of her hoodie.

“‘’Course. Thanks for giving a shit and taking care of me.” His smile is wide and genuine and she could maybe melt which is—silly for a lot of reasons, really—but she also remembers—

“How do you know my name?” she blurts.

“Uh.” A nervous hand musses his hair further. “We’ve had like four classes together and you—sort of stand out.”

He’s already pink with fever but his skin goes red and—is he blushing? She blushes back at the thought.

“Oh, yeah, okay, I just—uh—didn’t realize you noticed me or anything, especially at the library.”

Gods this is embarrassing.

“You weren’t exactly subtle,” his voice is gruff as he looks at his hands.

“But—“ she stammers. “Then why didn’t you just ask me to watch with you if you knew?”

“Thought you’d say no.” His eyes are still down though they flick her way for an instant.

Would she have?

Maybe. In the wrong mood. She can be stubborn, she knows. But still.

“Well, since I’m here, you were wrong.”

“Yeah, I caught that. Guess it’s too late now, anyway. Show’s done.”

It is, isn’t it.

The thought of giving up her Sunday study tv night makes her inexplicably sad. Especially since she’s here during summer and knows he is, too, from one of his calls with his brother.

“You have Hulu?” Inspiration strikes.

“Er—Uh—yeah?” He looks confused.

“Because I don’t, and I’ve been dying to watch Hamdmaid’s Tale.”

“Oh! Yeah, that’d be—cool. We could start tonight—I mean—“

“Yeah, sounds good. You clearly shouldn’t be alone with that fever and I don’t have a final until Tuesday!”

“Cool,” he repeats, calling up the Hulu menu on the television.

For her part, Maka can’thelp a slight satisfaction at having made a new friend who can afford to stream.

#ProMa writes #soma fic #soul eater fanfic #soul eater #soul x Maka

[jungshookz]

basketballcaptain!yoongi

→ pairing: min yoongi x reader

→ genre: basketball captain x water girl, cheesy cheesy stuff, the FLUFFIEST fluff, jungoo is an idiot, humour, nSFW = smut, cocky yoongi, spoiler alert yoongi does a body shot off of u it just be like that sometimes 

→ wordcount: 18.4k this will definitely make the app crash as per usual don’t come for me 

→ note: um can we talk about how attractive yoongi is when he spins a basketball on his finger like that,,, anyWays HAPPY DECEMBER (it’s my frickin birthday monTH) this is one day late and it’s almost 3am but i pulled thru and i was like i promised bball yoongi and that’s what i have 2 deliver to my children!! i hope u guys like this!!! pleaSE flood my inbox i love hearing back from y’all <3

pst if u wanna talk to y/n or kook or captain yoongs u know what to do ;-)

(gif isn’t mine!) 

(((and the read more function iS there but most of the time it doesn’t work on mobile :// i am sorry don’t attack me by sending passive-aggressive anon messages)))

somehoW someway jungkook managed to squirm himself into the upperclassmen’s basketball team which not only meant there that was no longer a water-boy but also that because of basketball practice you and kook wouldn’t be able to hang out as much anymore

and he’s used to seeing you every day because you’re his best friend okAy

y’all have been friends since the first day of uni during orientation when he spilt his banana milk all over himself and you immediately rushed over with napkins AND you gave him your chocolate milk instead (ur mom told u to seize all opportunities of friend-making and that was the one you happened to choose)

and you guys spend like all day every day with each other (which surprisingly is not as exhausting as it sounds)

you suffered through freshman fifteen together

you suffered through the blood sweat and tears of midterms and finals

you suffered through many awful frat parties together

the point is you guys have been there for each other through thick and thin since day one and when jungkook realised that basketball practice was going to get in the way of that well

that just won’t do

so naturally he puts two and two together

“i’m sorry, you what????”

“i asked coach and he’s all fine and dandy with having you as my replacement for water-boy. uh… water-girl? water-person… water-girl.” jungkook pops a grape into his mouth and chews thoughtfully “but now we can continue to see each other like evEry day!!!!!”

“kook, i’m not- i’m not going to be the basketball team’s water-girl. what??? how pathetic would that be???”

“hey! don’t insult my old job! you’ll be great!! plus you get extra credit for it and i know how much you love extra credit”

“kook i don’t have TIME to be a water-girl are you kidding me right now like mid-terms are coming up and you know i like preparing ahead of time for mid-terms”

“so study during practice”

“i can’t study surrounded by the sounds of squeaky runners and basketball dribbling!!!! look that was a really nice gesture and it’s really sweet that you wanna spend time with me and stuff but i promise you we’ll still hang out!!! we’ll find a way to-“

“you’ll have an excuse to see min yoongi almost every day.” jungkook points that out casually and you go dead silent

you clear your throat and shift in your seat before popping a fry into your mouth

ah

min yoongi

sit down everyone it’s time for a little story

you’ve had the fattest crush on min yoongi since your freshman year

the moment he sat down next to you during your history lecture (there were no other seats lol) you fell in love

he asked you for a pencil and you immediately gave him yours and he gave you this cute lil smile and head tilt and was like well what are you going to write with now sweetheart

you pull out another polka-dotted patterned pencil from your pencil case almost too enthusiastically and yoongi’s like haha alright then

you remember he had mint-green hair the first time you met him and your bad boy radar started tingling and your brain was just like YA HE’S RLY HOT WE LIKE HIM

he has silver?? or bleached?? hair now which honestly makes you feel hot just thinking about it because mM he looks so fuckign attractive with silver hair

anyways he spent the entire term sitting next to you

the two of you talked sometimes but you were always too shy to like keep the conversation going

in fact the only time you talked to yoongi was when you guys were in class

you saw him outside of class once and waved at him but he kinda just looked at you and then looked back at his friends and you were like okay big yikes never doing that again

but later in class he was like omg sorry i didn’t wave back at you i didn’t recognise ur face

and you immediately forgave him because thaT’s how much you adored min yoongi

but of course

all good things must come to an end

the next term you didn’t have any classes with him

or the next

or the next

and now you’re in your third year and yoongi’s in his final year

and you still have your not so teeny-weeny crush on him even though you haven’t spoken to him since your first year here which is honestly so dumb but like the heart wants what it wants or whatever

you clear your throat and twirl a fry in between your fingers before dipping it in ketchup

the fact that you haven’t put it in your mouth yet is an indicator that you are deep in thought

and jungkook’s like c’mon…… c’mon baby……. so close…….

“i mean…. i could always use the extra credit”

HOOK LINE AND SINKER BABY

jungkook has to contain his shriek of excitement and instead he nods quickly and is like cool cool i’ll tell coach

when jungkook hands you a pair of gym shorts and a grimy looking white t-shirt you immediately start regretting your decision

but you suck it up because you’re a Big Boi and you know what jungkook’s right!! it’s a good way to spend time together and doing this can spice up your resumé or whatever and show that you too can be a sporty person lol

“so like do i just have to… hand out bottles of water” you reach down and tug at the knee high socks before sitting down on the creaky wooden bench and crossing your legs

this is probably one of the only times you’ve ever been on the basketball court let alone the sports centre

“well..,.,.,” jungkook pauses and then smiles sheepishly “you also have to hand out towels and then you have to wash the jerseys after practice aNd the towels and technically we don’t do the plastic water bottle thing anymore because of the environment so instead we use reusable cups and all that so instead you’ll have to fill up a huge jug of ice water before every practice and every game and the water refill station is like by the football field which is a ten minute walk from here so then you’ll have to lug it over and you can’t be late or else coach will-“

“i’m going to kill you.” the next thing he knows you’re suddenly launching off the bench and towards him and you end up chasing him around the basketball court multiple times but of course you never catch him because he’s a speedy boi “i’M GOING TO KILL YOU”

“I’M SORRY THAT I JUST WANT TO SPEND MORE TIME WITH YOU” jungkook screams in reply and he feels the whoosh of a basketball hurtling past his head

all of a sudden the two of you hear the blast of a whistle and jungkook immediately stops and you end up slamming right into his back

the next thing you know you’re staring up at the ceiling and there are cartoon birds circling your head

jungkook yanks you back up to your feet quickly and you have to lean against him and grip onto his arm to stop yourself from toppling to the ground

when did his back get so hard and muscly

“don’t make me regret recruiting you onto the team, jeon” coach bang raises a brow at jungkook and jungkook smiles sheepishly “you must be y/n! our new water girl.”

you clear your throat and adjust your glasses (that u should’ve taken oFF in case u get whacked in the face by a ball) before nodding quickly “yes! yep, um, that’s me. thank you for… letting me… hydrate… the team”

what the fuck

what the hell was that

lol okay moving on

“i’m sure jungkook’s already told you all about the basics and what you have to do - i’ll go over it with you after practice today in case jungkook missed anything.”

“so like- what am i supposed to do during practice? like… do i just sit on the bench and-“

“yep! you can always bring your books in to study if you’d like. it’s kind of just like a free period for you, think about it like that. aLRIGHT BOYS HUDDLE UP” you jump like ten feet into the air when coach bang blows his whistle and you immediately head over to the bench

jungkook grins and waves at you from where the boys are and you scowl and roll your eyes

you love him but sometimes he kinda irritating u know

the doors to the gym swing open and someone runs in

“i’m here! i’m here, i’m not late!”

oh

oh

you recognise that bleached head of hair

it’s like he’s running in slow motion

oh god

he’s so beautiful

“not as late as you usually are, min. good job!”

you feel your heart skip a beat at the sight of min yoongi jogging into the gym and huddling up with the rest of the guys

“sorry, coach! you know how it is sometimes”

“… i really don’t. okay, so-“

god he looks good wearing a bandana

you look down at your outfit and immediately cringe

there is nO way in hell you’re going to let min yoongi see you wearing this

the gym shorts luckily are for girls so they’re not too bad but this shIRT…,.,, sweeTIe

you roll up the sleeves and tie the shirt into a little knot

a cute lil crop top

a sweaty cute lil crop top with questionable stains on it

okay

okay you can work with this

you look up and catch a couple of the guys looking over at you and you immediately go bright red

yoongi tilts his head and smiles and you’re like okAY let me pretend like i’m doing work!!!!!

practice goes by pretty smoothly

a couple times the ball goes out of bounds and rolls over to you and kook is always the one to come and get it

finally

finALLY you have something to do

you start filling up cups of water and handing them out to all the grabby hands

one of the guys sighs and dumps the cup of water over his head and you resist the urge to strangle him because he totally just waSTED WATER that you TREKKED all the way to the other side of the school for

“here you gooOO” you clear your throat and look away bashfully when yoongi heads over and reaches for the cup in your hand

he thanks you quietly before chugging it down

yoongi crushes the paper cup in his hand and tosses it into the recycling bin and that’s not supposed to be attractive but somehow he makes it look attractive

meanwhile jungkook’s basically lying underneath the water dispenser letting the water run into his mouth and you’re about to slap him and stop him from being such a water buffalo but you feel a gentle tap on your shoulder

“don’t i know you from somewhere?” yoongi asks and purses his lips and you find that heat rises to your cheeks again

oh

he doesn’t  

he doesn’t remember you

well like

he remembers YOU (kinda) he just doesn’t remember your name

okay that’s fine like it’s not as bad as it could be

that’s cool whatever

“i’m, um, i’m y/n! yeah. i’m… i’m y/n.” you clear your throat and you feel your cheeks heat up because what kind of an introduction was that

“y/n…” yoongi pauses and squints his eyes a little before they pop wide open “y/n! polka-dot pencil girl?”

“…yep, polka-dot pencil girl!” you chuckle awkwardly and scratch the back of your neck before you point to the jug of water “water-girl now. i’ve, uh, i’ve levelled up”

yoongi laughs and tilts his head and GOD his smile is adorable “well it’s good to have you on the team!”

before you get a chance to say something back coach bang tells the boys to hit the showers because they all stANK

actually it’s a good thing yoongi had to leave because you did not know where to go with that conversation

socializing is exhausting honestly

“alright, y/n - now we get to the best part of your job.” coach bang pats your back a couple times before pointing to the laundry cart

…son of a bitch

“get in there, soldier!”

you groan quietly and feel your soul leave your body

oh good god

boys are shameless and that’s the tea sis

you have to calm yourself because you’re about to wheel a laundry basket into the men’s locker room and there are going to be shirtless guys everywhere and you know what you’re probably going to see a pee-pee or two but no one told u life was gonna be this way (clap clap clap clap)  

this is like a dream and a nightmare combined

you hear wolf-whistles as you enter the locker rooms and you keep your head down as you wheel the laundry cart through

fuCK this is so awkward

you go to class with most of these guys and they’re literally all half naked right now

whOOp that’s a butt you just looked directly into someone’s ass cheeks

ur going to kill jungkook for forcing u to take this job

you can’t help but sigh a breath of relief when you see jungkook’s familiar face

“heads up!” you squeak when jungkook suddenly YEETs his uniform into the cart

“don’t throw your shit at me!!” you scowl and pick up a sock that didn’t make the tough journey into the cart

“here you go, y/n!” namjoon hands you his (folded) uniform and you smile

namjoon is so sweet and nice

…why is he friends with jungkook lol

“get oFF of mE you sweaty freak” you scowl when jungkook wraps his arms around you in a back hug and nuzzles his gross sticky face against your neck

“isn’t this great?? we get to spend so much time together now!” jungkook grins and you manage to wriggle out of his grip and head back to the cart

“if by great you mean absolutely torturous then ye-“ you gasp when you bump into someone hArd and fall back on your bum and suddenly you’re staring up at the ceiling lights

“oh my god - are you okay??” you sit up quickly and-

NO

YOU ARE NOT GOOD

A HALF NAKED MIN YOONGI IS STANDING OVER YOU RIGHT NOW

he has his uniform balled up under his arm and he only has a towel wrapped around his waist and goD his body is glistening from his shower and he smells like vanilla

he’s not like jungkook the muscle pig but he’s still pretty fit and you see the faint outlines of his abs and his v-line and wOw you need to stop ogling him right now

the voice in the back of your mind reminds you that yoongi is very very naked underneath his towel

he holds his hand out for you to take but you shake your head quickly

“i’m- yep, i’m great. i’m fine. i need your shorts. to wash.” you clear your throat and hop back up onto your feet before standing behind the cart and clutching onto the rail

“… just my shorts?” he smiles and raises a brow

“and your top. both of them. all of it.”

girl

GET  A GRIP

what is wrONG WITH U  

yoongi smiles and tosses his uniform into the cart before moving past you to his locker

you scowl at jungkook when he grins and wiggles his eyebrows at you

you resist the urge to grab a handful of sweaty shorts and dump it over his head

“so,,,, you think you’re going to shoot your shot with yoongi?” jungkook hums and pokes your hand with his pencil

“i’m only doing this for the extra credit.”

“uh-huh, yeah, for sure!” jungkook sighs and leans back against the chair

you let out a sigh when you feel his gaze on you

“i’m not going to shoot my shot with yoongi.”

“no, no. i believe you!”

you look up from your notebook

“i’m serious!!!!”

jungkook purses his lips and shrugs “….uh-huh.”

okay

so it’s been about two-ish weeks since you started working as the water-girl

so far things have been pretty good pretty gucci

you’ve become a well-oiled machine when it comes to handing out cups of water and dodging sweaty pieces of uniform that are thrown at you instead of the cart

coach bang thinks you’re doing a greAt job even though your job requires like zero skills but you know what you’ll take whatever compliment you can GeT

and now it’s lead up to this

the first game of the season

the boys have been practicing pretty hard and you’ve been to every single practice session so u knoW that they know what they’re doing

first game of the season!! which is always exciting

you’ve never been excited about it before

as mentioned previously you are noT a sports person

but jungkook’s on the team now and you wanna support him

and also you need an excuse to stare at min yoongi for as long as you want without coming off as completely creepy

and aLso you’re the water girl so you kinda have to be there regardless of you wanting to be there or not

you grunt as you set down the barrel of water

you’re definitely going to get swoLE after this because dis shit is so heavy

you sigh and look down at your little setup

water? check

ice? check

first aid kit? double check

something’s missing

oh frick u forgot the cups

and you can’t have kook drinking straight out of the barrel that would not be ideal

you cringe thinking of how gross and germy that would be

so you head to the back to grab the box of cups

and as you make your back to the bench to join coach bang you’re suddenly swATTEd in the face by a pom pom

“jesus-“ you sputter and blink quickly

“oh my goodness, i’m so sorry! i didn’t see you there, hun!” the cheerleader grins at you before going back into her routine “woo, go team!”

you haven’t really spoken to the cheerleaders before

you’ve seen them practice outside on the courtyard but they never come into the gym

you know some of their names tho

lisa of course is the head cheerleader

who else do you know

lisa’s in your english lecture

there’s rose

wendy

most of them are really nice!!!

you like cheerleaders but u don’t know how they’re so peppy all the time

at one point you considered trying out for the team but then you saw them doing that thing that they do when they lift one girl into the air and the girl in the air has to balance on one leg and hold up an arm with a hand on her hip and then they DROP HER AND CATCH HER aNd the poor girl has to do aLL of that while maintaining a megawatt smile on her face

so then you were like lol perhaps not

not to mention

you would be the grumpiest cheerleader alive

there’s no way you’d be able to smile through like a 10 minute routine

and you have to constantly cheEr the team on like sure you’ll whoop once or twice but more than that is a wee bit excessive

anyways the game’s going pretty good so far?? the home team is a couple points ahead of the opposing team so you’re pretty sure the guys have this game in the bag you’re not too worried

coach bang literally doesn’t care like he’s playing tetris on his phone right now

basketball isn’t typically thought of as a sexy sport in ur humble opinion but daMn min yoongi definitely made basketball his BITCH

every single shot he’s made has been flawless

it just swooshes right into the hoop

doesn’t even hit the rim of the hoop or anything it just glides right in

he weaves in and out between people so effortlessly

also when his tongue flicks out to lick over his bottom lip

and hello??? sweaty yoongi???? running a hand through his hair and adjusting his bandana

YES daddy

oh my god and his HANDS

his hands are so attractive

long fingers

veiny

trimmed fingernails

this is a very creepy description of his hands but

is it weird that you find his hands sexy

he just has…. manly hands

the way he grips the ball is just *italian chef kiss*  

and when he spins the ball on one finger casually while talking to the team about strategies and techniques during the short break

mMPH

thank god you’re the water girl because u r thirsty af right now

you spend the whole game practically drooling over yoongi you don’t even notice when jungkook score the winning shot

jungkook sprinTS to you immediately after he’s done freaking out with the boys

“DID U SEE IT DID U SEE ME I JUST SCORED THE WINNING SHOT” he yanks you up off the bench and you instinctively start bouncing up and down with him

it’s not a real friendship if there aren’t little white lies sprinkled in every now and then am i right ladies

“……OF COURSE I SAW THE WINNING SHOT I’M SO PROUD OF U” you squeal in glee and jungkook falls for it duH because ur a good actress

he moves past you to get some water

“hey look at you!! you had all the cups filled and ready to go”

“y/n” yoongi greets you and you immediately turn into timid quiet y/n again

“hi yoongi” you automatically offer him a cup of water and he takes it graciously

he downs the whole cup in one go and you watch his adam’s apple bob as he sloRPS it all down

he crushes the paper cup in his hand before shooting it into the recycling bin

f u C K THAT WAS RLY HOT

“cute shirt” yoongi’s eyes look you up and down before he smirks and tilts his head “i-“

“yoongi! you did such a good job out there!” yoongi turns around and you look over his shoulder to see lisa bouncing over to him

hm

he turns to face her and she gives him a tight hug and you’re like lmao okay yEET this is awkward what do i do  

so you turn back to face kook and yank him away from the barrel of water

“if you even think about opening the lid of the barrel and shoving your face into the water i will slaughter you”

“y/n, cOMe on” jungkkok groans and flops down and squishes his cheek against the table

“shush, kook. we’re in the library” you hiss and pinch his ear before turning your attention back to your laptop

“please?? it’s going to be so fun!!!”

“iiiiiii don’t know” you mutter and scratch the back of your neck “you know parties aren’t really my thing n u always go off with ur teammates anyway so i don’t wanna-“

“yoongi’ll definitely be there”

you scoff and give him a pointed look

“don’t you dare play that card again”

“c’mON PLEAse it’s going to be so fun!!!! we’re celebrating a win!!!!! you’re part of the team!!!”

it takes everything within you not to burst out laughing

you?? part of the team??

all you do is hydrate some thirsty bois and then wash their nasty ass uniforms like how is that being part of the team

“look, just come for like an hour. if you don’t like it, i’ll take you back home and we can watch movies and gorge on ice cream and pizza.” jungkook pouts and steals another one of your animal crackers and pops it into his mouth “pleaaaaaaaas-“

“no.”

“pLeaAAAAAAAAA-“ you lean over and clamp a hand over jungkook’s mouth when people start to stare at the two of you

“will you cut it out?” you sigh and sit back down on the bench “i’m not-“

“…PLEAAASSAASASSAEASAEZA-“

“aLRIGHT alright! finE!” you scowl and swat jungkook’s hands away when it finds its way back to your baggie of animal crackers  

he smiles that bunny smile at you when you glare at him for pulling you into going to this damn party

long story short: you should’ve stayed home tonight

you’ve been here for about an hour and a half

you’re nursing your second cup of god-knows-what’s-in-here fruit punch (jimin made it) so you’re feeling it a liTTle but it’s not too bad ?? you think

you’ve stuck to kook’s side the whole night because lol where else would you be

and jungkook said he wasn’t going to go crazy tonight but you knew that promise would be broken the moment you guys stepped into the house and he was like yO BRO WHAT’S UP BRO LET’S GO BRO

so now jungkook is drunk off his ass and you’re figuring out how the hell you’re going to survive the night with a drunk jungkook

it’s loud in here

you can feel the bass of the song in your ASS that’s how loud the music is (ew)

people are pushing you around and they’re all sweaty and you’ve gotten stepped on plenty of times

your poor pinky toe is all numb

the only source of lights are fairy lights strung up around the rooms which is awful for your eyes like your vision already sucks you NEED proper lighting

how come they’re only playing drake songs??? there are other artists that exist besides drAKE

kiki i know you love me sweetie but you gotta get outta here

you for one would love to hear some one direction songs blast over the speakers am i right ladies

now thAT would hype you up big time

and on top of thAt you haven’t even seen yoongi yet so you’re pretty sure you dressed up for nOTHING

you’re wearing a plain black tank top tucked into a cute checkered skirt and you have a sensible cardigan over the outfit

((it’s a very cute outfit 10/10)) (((a little sensible for a house party but it’s okay honey you can try again next time)))

“oKay you know i think we’ve had enough for the night!” you grab the bottle of vodka from jungkook and put it down on the counter before grabbing his wrist and tugging on it gently “how about we get you to a nice, comfy bed? you can snooze for an hour and i’ll wake you up and you can come back to my place and-“

“bODY SHOTS” you hear the smash of glass in the distance and jump in surprise and the moment jungkook hears ‘body shots’ he wriggles out of your grip and heads towards where everyone is

“jung-“ you squeak when jungkook suddenly turns back and grabs you before swinging you over his shoulder “jeON JUNGKOOK NO”

“BODY SHOTS” jungkook laughs loudly and “y/N Do some body shots with mE!!!!”

all of a sudden you’re being plopped down on the edge of the kitchen counter with a whole crowD of people around the two of you

you blink quickly because the room is kind of spinning from how fast jungkook put you down

there are already a line of girls waiting patiently next to jungkook and you groan in frustration when jungkook lifts his shirt up over his head and tosses it somewhere into the crowd of eager girls before hopping up onto the counter as well

you’re going to have to go and ask the girls for his shirt back later and you know you gon have to fight the ladies to get it back

“step on up, ladies and gents!” jimin cheers and hands both you and kook a wedge of lime before handing a shot to the first girl in line for kook

“jimin, get someone else up here because i’m not about to have a complete stranger-“

“we got anyone for water girl, hm?”

everyone whoops and you freeze

you’re surprised at the reaction that that question got and your cheeks flare up immediately and you try to hand the wedge of lime back to jimin

“jimin, i really don’t-“

“-i’ll do it.” you turn your head when you feel someone standing in front of you and your heart drops to your stomach when you see yoOngi standing before you with a smirk

his eyes are kind of glazed over so you know he been drankin but godDamn the way he’s looking at you makes you feel some kinda way

“you sure you don’t wanna play?” jimin looks at you with a twinkle in his eye and you clear your throat before scratching your elbow

“i mean i guess i could play one round”

“that’s what i thought” jimin coos and pinches your cheek and you scowl at him “alright, captain!” yoongi gets a couple pats on the back from jimin before jimin hands him a shot of tequila

“hey, but like, for real, you don’t have to do this if you don’t want to” jimin mutters in your ear as he prepares the salt

you shake your head quickly “no, it’s fine! i’ll be fine”

college experience and all that jazz

and also min yoongi experience and all that jazz

jimin sprinkles salt,,, basically all over jungkook’s abs and the girls go crazy and you immediately look down at yourself because whERE is jimin going to sprinkle salt on you??? you don’t want people looking at your tummy!!! or your stripey purple bra!!!!!!!

jimin can see that you’re about to explode so he decides to take it easy on you lol

instead of lying you down and sprinkling salt on your chest or your tummy he sprinkles salt on the back of yoongi’s hand instead

“this is y/n’s first time, we don’t wanna overwhelm her” jimin winks and you clear your throat and avoid yoongi’s gaze

yoongi reaches forward and grabs your hand that’s holding the lime and pulls it up a little “hold that nice n steady for me, angel” yoongi purrs and steps closer til he’s standing in between y ou r legs

[sweating intensifies]

oh god

oh god

you just have to bend down a little and you’d be kissing yoongi

that’s great that’s wonderful we’re cool we’re super cool

“alright, on the count of three-“ jimin holds up the timer “one, two… three-!”

you watch as yoongi licks the line of salt off the back of his hand anD then downs the shot (and his nose scrunches very adorably from the burn of the alcohol) and then he’s leaning forward and taking the lime in between your fingers with his mouth and suCking on it while he has one hand wrapped around your wrist and the other one casually resting on your knee and he is defINITELY staring up at you right now

you can feel his grip burning from where he’s holding you and woW it’s getting hot in here hOo someone needs to open a window

your lips part and you feel the heat rising to your cheeks when yoongi’s right eye drops in a wink before he takes the completely sucKED out lime from you and tosses it into the bin

you hear everyone break into cheers and you get snapped out of your daze a little bit

“good job, water girl” yoongi smirks and pats your knee before turning and disappearing into his group of bros and whAT JUST HAPPENED

“wOO BODY SHOTS” jungkook screams and you look over to see like four different girls on him “there’s plenty of me to goOo aROUNddDD ladiezzZzzzzz”  

“oh jesus- alright, aLRIGHT that’s enouGH ladies!!!!” you hop off the counter and swat them away like flies before grabbing jungkook and yanking him off the counter

after you finally tuck jungkook into (your) bed (u forced him to take a shower aNd brush his teeth and he has spare clothes for when he crashes at ur place) you plop down on the couch and just sit in complete silence

what happened tonight

you went to a party

didn’t do anything for like two hours

next thing you know min yoongi is sucking a lime wedge from your fingers and looking at you like he wants to devour you

were you slightly turned on? yes

wig? snatched

do you want him to do it again? yes

hotel? trivago

did your technique of repressing feelings work? absolutely not because you definitely have a crush on min yoongi once again

jesUs

you groan and roll your eyes before flopping your head backwards against the couch

having feelings is just so exhausting

and then you have to go through the effort of making sure you look extra good everyday in case you bump into yoongi

u know what

no

you don’t have feelings for yoongi

you know what he’s like

you’ve ~gathered information~ on him

you know he hooks up with plenty of girls and you heard he had a thing with lisa for a bit

you know he’s a very casual spontaneous kinda dude and he probably isn’t looking for anything serious right now BUT if he weRe looking for something well sweetie your shop is wiDe open 24/7 just for him

ok ew calm down

okay

this is just like the first time you realised you like yoongi

just suppress it and don’t address it

“suppress it don’t address it” you whisper to yourself before settling down against the couch and pulling the throw blanket up and over yourself

you sigh and close your eyes

yeah

you’ll be fine

you wake up the next morning in a cold sweat because u definitely had a rated R dream involving a certain captain of the basketball team

you compose yourself and snap out of it before deciding it’d probably be a good idea to wipe your crusty makeup off and change out of last night’s clothes

maybe even take a shower and wash all remnants of yoongi off of u (even tho u don’t wANT to)

frick

you’re already falling down the rabbit hole u might as well just accept it

“i’m staying over again i can’t be bothered to go back to my place” you jump like ten feet into the air when jungkook speaks up and that’s when you realise he’s sitting on the ground playing video games on the TV

jeSus

“how are you feeling?” you tie your damp hair up and plop down on the couch

“fine! thanks for leaving the painkillers and water for me” jungkook glances at you briefly over his shoulder and raises a brow “you okay? you look a little pale”

“i’m fine! i just, um, i’m fine.” you clear your throat before sliding off the couch and joining kook on the floor “now hand me a controller because i’m about to beat your ass at mario kart”

“y/n! we have a little surprise for youUuUu” you stand up and turn your attention away from the water dispenser to see kook and a couple of the other boys heading towards you with a box

“what’s this?” you look up and kook and he just grins and gestures for you to open up the box

you sit down on the bench and start pulling at the neatly tied ribbon

you pull out a red cardigan and raise a brow

it has a little basketball patch on the right and on the left is a patch of a cup of wATER

“it’s your varsity… cardigan!”

“we were going to get the varsity jacket for you but they were too expensive so we settled for this”

wow

same tho

“since you’re the official water girl now, the guys and i thought maybe this would be a fun way to welcome you onto the team officially” jungkook nudges your side “look at the back!!!!”

you flip the cardigan over and your heart warms at the sight of your last name stitched onto the back

judging by the stitching work jungkook definitely did this for you

“you got me a water girl cardigan?” you snort

“we made you a water girl cardigan! which makes it ten times more special”

“it’s cuTe tho right??” jin slides in next to you “i chose the patches”

“it’s very cute” you laugh and put it on “and very comfortable!”

“and it matches our varsity jackets!!” namjoon points out “put it on!!” you slide it on and woW this is very comfortable you are never taking this off you are wearing this to your graVE

“oh, cute!!!” you stand up and twist and turn a little and you notice the little elbow patches that are stitched to look like bASKETBALLS

“hey, what’s going on here?”

“oh! um, hi! hey, hello” you smile shyly and yoongi swears he could explode right there because that was adorable heLLO

“cute cardigan” yoongi hums and looks you up and down and you smile excitedly and look down at it

“thank you! i-“

“boys, huddle up!” yoongi scrunches his nose

every time he starts talking to you someone else is like SIKE

you sit down on the bench and smile at yoongi when he gives you a little wave

and you try to ignore the feeling of your heart going ddu ddu ddu  

jungkook might’ve (definitely) let it slip that you (definitely) have a thing for yoongi

not to yoongi of course lol he’s not thAt bad

one day jungkook is the only one who knows about your not so teeny crush and the next thing you know half the damn team knows about it

but you threatened each of them and said if they ever told yoongi you would put itching powder in their shorts

that doesn’t stop them from constantly teasing you though

“how come yoongi always gets a full cup of water and i always get a half-full cup of water??”

jungkook whines and you smack his arm lightly

“yeah, i want the yoongi treatment too!” jin chimes in and you swat at him when he starts laughing

your cheeks flame up when you see yoongi hiding a smile behind his cup of water while he’s wiping some sweat off his forehead

“you guys suck” you mutter and whip jungkook with a towel when he coos and makes kissy faces at you

you’re in the middle of handing clean uniforms back to the boys when the first inevitable comment comes up

“y/n, yoongi’s jersey feels so much softer than mine! how come yoongi gets all the fabric softener??” jimin pouts and rubs yoongi’s shorts against his cheek and u snaTCh it away from him and fold it back neatly

“it’s because she likes him better than us” jungkook smirks while towel-drying his hair

“all of your uniforms go into the saMe batch you duMMy” you grumble and shove jungkook’s uniform into his chest

“…she didn’t deny it” jungkook mutters lowly and the boys are like yA man ur right she’s so whipped for yoongi lol

you glare at all of them and shake your he-

“anything for me?” you immediately perk up at the sound of what has become your favourite voice

you turn around and see yoongi (you’ve gotten used to seeing him half-naked with just a towel wrapped around his waist but it still gets your heart racing) and you grin before handing him his freshly-ironed, neatly-folded uniform

“my uniform wasn’t ironed” hoseok mutters and nudges jungkook

“i’m telling you, it’s the yoongi treatment!”

“y/n, lemme help you!” you turn to look over your shoulder when you hear yoongi

he jogs up behind you and before you get a chance to say you’re fine he grabs the barrel of water effortlessly

you get a quick glimpse of his biceps flexing and you’re like o h……. sweet baby jesus have mercy

“i could’ve handled that myself, you know” you joke and open the door for yoongi

“i know. i was just being the gentleman that i am.” yoongi winks at you and you snort and roll your eyes

“why are you here so early? practice doesn’t start for like-“ you push your sleeve up a little and look down at your watch “another forty minutes or so”

“i know but i didn’t have anything to do. i was going to go to the library to do some work but i figured i’d come here instead” yoongi points to his backpack

“what kind of work do you have to do?”

“eh, i was just gonna take some notes. biology is kicking my ass”

“biology? i love biology!!!” you geek out and yoongi smiles and raises a brow “i mean… i know a bit about biology. i can help you if you want? since we have forty minutes”

yoongi scrunches his nose and looks down at his backpack before shrugging “alright, brainiac. show me whatcha got”

yoongi is 110% totally infatuated and completely enthralled with you

he lets out a sigh and leans his cheek against his knuckles as he continues listening to you

the two of you are sitting on the ground next to the bench and facing each other  

(he actually knows what you’re talking about he just wanted an excuse to talk to you)

you’re so dang cute even though you’re talking about the female reproduction system and how menstruation works

the way your eyes light up when you’re like SPERM let me tell you about the journey of the sperm to the egg is SO cute

he keeps his eyes trained on your mouth and you pause to flip through the textbook

you chew on your bottom lip to find the page you’re looking for and yoongi instinctively takes his bottom lip in between his teeth  

also you did your hair super adorable today

you have like a half-up half-down pigtails kind of situation going on (ur hair was a mess when u woke up and it looked decent like this even tho kook said you look like a three year old toddler)

and you’re wearing that darn varsity cardigan

he can see some loose threads on the end of the sleeve where you pick at unconsciously

he’s noticed that you have very endearing habits and he is Obsessed with a capital O

“so what happens is that the endometrial layer sloughs away and eliminated from the body in the form of menstrual blood! and when the estrogen and progesterone levels are too low-“

“-too low to inhibit the anterior pituitary, the cycle can begin again.” yoongi finishes off

you blink in surprise

dang he’s a fast learner

you’re a much better tutor than you thought you were

you give yourself a mental pat on the back

“yes! yes, that’s exactly right.” you clear your throat and slide the textbook back to yoongi before checking your watch

it’s been about 40 minutes of just studying

you don’t really know where to go from here lol

yoongi clears his throat “heY um there’s this movie that just recently came out and i have an extra ticket if you wanna-“

the blast of a whistle cuts yoongi off and he wants to scream into a pillow

LITERALLY

EVERY SINGLE TIME HE’S ABOUT TO ASK U OUT/BLATANTLY FLIRT W U

SOMETHING/SOMEONE INTERRUPTS HIM

“y/n!!!!!!” the two of you turn and see kook jogging towards you “i’m soRRY i skipped history today-“

“-and yesterday, and the day befor- ooF” the next thing you know kook is tackling you in a hug

yoongi feels a flame of jealousy spark within him

huh

he can’t help but wonder if you and kook are possibly,, more than friends

he’s never considered the possibility before

…damn

this is disappointing

Big Disappointment Energy

yoongi purses his lips and gets up off the ground

��hold on, kook- yoongi!” yoongi turns around “you were saying? about the movie?”

yoongi opens his mouth to speak

but now he feels pressure with the whole damn team here and also you’re talking to him with jungkook practically on tOp of you

“uh, nothing! don’t worry about it” yoongi swallows thickly and shrugs “thanks for helping me with bio”

you deflate a little

you swoRe he was about to ask u out on a movie date but

maybe he was just making small talk

“so are you gonna give me the notes from the lecture?” jungkook grins and you swat the side of his head before gently nudging him off of you

“i don’t think i have a choice, do i?”

honestly

you really reALLY love jungkook more than you should because here you are pumping up basketballs on a saturday afternoon instead of doing something more fun or productive

you dribble a freshly pumped up ball and hold it out in front of you

you close an eye and aim for the hoop and you very vioLENtly hurl it towards the hoop

instead of it going up it goes straight forward and bounces off the pole

lol

you’re literally like allergic to sports so holding the basketball alone is enough to make you break out into hives

“a little violent, no?” you jump when you hear a voice from behind you and of couRSe it’s yoongi

when you’re dressed in sweatpants and one of jungkook’s hoodies and your hair is messier than a bird’s nest and you bAREly have any makeup on of COURSE yoongi has to come and see you

“you think so? i thought that was the perfect amount of violent” you joke and bend down to pick up the ball when it rolls back towards you

“c’mon, give it a try!” yoongi nods over to the hoop and you swallow thickly

you wish this was one of those moments where ur like oh i’M not goOd at thIs at ALL and then you throw the ball covering your eyes and it goes smoothly into the hoop but it’s NOT

THIS IS REALITY SWEETHEART

you throw the ball and it bARELY reaches the hoop like that’s how weak your throw was

you turn around and give yoongi a sheepish smile and he’s like sO infatuated with you because you’re so cute

“you know, that wasn’t half bad.” yoongi offers and gets up from the bench as you go to pick up the ball “definitely have to work on your posture, tho”

all of a sudden yoongi’s standing behind you and you’re like o fuCK

status: trying not to SCREAM LIKE A PTERODACTYL

“stand up straight,” yoongi mutters lowly and he presses a hand flat against your stomach and you straighten up immediately

yoongi wraps his arms around you and places his hands over yours

you’re surprised your hands aren’t shAKIng from this interaction

his hands are so warm and so soft

“and then you just-“ yoongi raises his arms with yours and you let go of the ball as he flicks “swoosh!”

unsurprisingly the ball swOOshes into the hoop and yoongi’s still standing behind you with his hands over yours

in fact your guys’ fingers have seemed to intertwined themselves

“swoosh.” you clear your throat and wiggle out of yoongi’s grip to go and retrieve the ball

you haven’t turned around to face him yet because your face is literally on fire

yoongi’s kinda pouty about the fact you squirmed away but he recovers quickly

he ain’t a quitter

“how about you practice your dribbling? that’s easier than shooting” yoongi smirks and tilts his head

fair enough

dribbling is also a lot less stressful

“i’ll give you a three second head start-“

wait what

why do you need a head start

“and then i’m going to steal the ball from you.”

you waste approximately 1.8 seconds to register what’s happening and then you immediately sprint off and dribble the ball as fast as you can

as soon as you hear yoongi’s cackling and the sound of his shoes squeaking against the floor you’re like nopE we are NOT DOING THIS and you grab the ball and just run for your damn life

“wha- you’re trAVELLING THAT’S CHEATING” yoongi laughs and you can’t help but grin like an idiot as he chases you around the gym

“it’s mY BALL” you screech and somehow the two of you end up at the bleachers

you’re standing at opposite ends at both you and yoongi are out of breath

“gotcha!!” you shriek when yoongi grabs you all of a sudden but of course the two of you lose balance and the next thing you know you end up on the ground with yoongi on toP of you

the ball bounces gently and rolls away

the two of you are panting and looking at each other

like u physically cannOt look away

“you guys need to get a room” yoongi scrambles off of you when you guys hear jungkook

luckily it’s juSt jungkook

if coach bang walked in to see you straddling yoongi that wouldn’t be great

“oh, we weren’t- i just accidentally-“

“uh-huh”

you smile sheepishly and dust yourself off

practice goes by pretty smoothly and you can’t help but notice that yoongi is glancing over much more often than he usually does

he’s flashing you shy smiles and waving at you anD he always makes sure you’re watching him before he nonchalantly scores a point

like he tossed a ball over his shoulder and it swooshed right into the hoop and of couRse you’re frickin rearranging the cups when he does that

although he has to say he was glad you weren’t paying attention when he nearly tripped and fell flat on his face so

yoongi’s losing his mind in a good way if that makes any sense

he doesn’t think he’s ever liked someone as much as he likes you and he’s kind of scared?? because he’s never had feelings like this before

usually with girls he has to admit he

uh

loves them then leaves them is the nicer way of putting it

his heart beats sO fast when he walks into the gym and the first thing he sees is you and the first thing he hears is your giggle  

your ass looks really good in those shorts pluS your boobs look great in that tank top and hello you’re wearing that adorable cardigan you are so CUTE

his eyes can’t help but trail down to the swell of your bum when you turn to the side to talk to coach bang

yoongi looks away quickly because he is not about to sprout a boner in front of his teammates

basketball shorts do a horrible job of hiding boners

some of the greasier members of the team are like grouped together in the corner talking about you and yoongi wants to punch every single one of their smug faces in

“you think she gives it up easy?”

“are you kidding me? she obviously does. she’s practically begging for it every time she comes into the changing room. i’d take her over the bench no questions asked”

“and did you see what she was wearing at the party the other night? would’ve loved to-“

yoongi hurls a basketball at one of them and it hits him in the back of his head

“oW fuCKIN-“

“why aren’t you idiots practicing? kihyun, your dribbling sucks ass so i suggest you gET ON THAT” yoongi snaps and kihyun’s like jesus christ finE

The cult of Aphrodite was largely derived from that of-

your fingers pause on the keyboard

you look up from your laptop to see six smiling faces

okay

weird

you shake your head and go back to your paper

-largely derived from that of the Phoenician goddess Astarte, a cognate of the East Semitic goddess Ishtar, whose cult was-

the boys all exchange glances with each other

jin is the first one to speak up

“when are you and yoongi going to get together?”

you snort immediately and and continue typing

-whose cult was based on the Sumerian cult of Inanna. Aphrodite's main cult centers were-

jungkook suddenly reaches out and slaps your laptop shut

you yelp and pull your fingers away before they get snAPPed off

“we’re serious!”

“why does it matter to you people?” you raise a brow

“because you guys obviously like each other and it’s driving everyone crazy that you’re not officially together like could your flirting be any moRE obnoxious-“ jimin slaps a hand over jungkook’s mouth

your fingers pause as you take a moment to ponder

okay

you and yoongi have been flirting a lot lately

at least you thINK you guys have been flirting a lot

you like him a lot

like a LOT

and you think?? maybe he might like you back?

he acts a lot differently around you compared to the beginning of the season

“you should totally go and shoot your shot while yoongi’s shooting his shots in the gym” jin hums and you roll your eyes “get it because he’s literally shooting his shots but like you’re metaphorically-“

“yoU know what i’m going to do it because i’m going to shoot myself in the foot if i have to sit through one of your awful jokes” you start shoving everything into your backpack and namjoon gives jin a fist bump

“good luck!” you hear tae and you turn back and give the boys a wave as you swing your bag over your shoulder

a small smile twitches at your lips

for some reason you feel like you don’t need any luck

yoongi whistles a tune to himself as he swishes another ball into the hoop

he glances quickly when he hears the gym doors open but he doesn’t pay it much mind

(he’s hoping it’s you who just walked in but he’s going to act super casual like oH y/n i didn’t see u there i was just casually practicing my shots no biggie)

he hears a faint rustle and then a giggle “look at those biceps! someone’s been working out for the big game”

oh

that is not your voice

that is lisa’s voice

yoongi grips the ball and twists around quickly to look at her

“um, hi!” he greets awkwardly and scratches the back of his neck and kinda looks around the gym prayING that someone’s around

“mind if i join you? practice ended early for me.” lisa smiles that sweet smile and yoongi shrugs and nods before reciprocating a smile

“no, i don’t mind at all.”

there’s a bit of a pep in your step as you make your way down the hallway

you’ve never really done this before

the whole confessing to someone that you like them thing

mainly because you’ve never been so confident before that someone’s liked you

but now

bitch you is confident

you swear on your pet goldfish’s graVE (rip bubbles) that yoongi likes you just as much as you like him

you just feel so giddy inside it’s great!!!!!

this is a greAT FEELING

love is so nice

you let out a sigh as you see the doors to the gym and you hear the faint sound of a basketball dribbling around

you pause before you get to the doors and take a moment of silence to give yourself a pep talk

okay y/n

you know he likes you back

you’ve got this in the bAg sis

just go up to him and be like so when are you going to take me out on a date?

yeah man

big fuckin dick energy

embrace it!

you give yourself a mental fist bump and walk towards the door

you push it open slowly because all of a sudden you’re nervous

and so you open it wide enough so that you can see what’s going on but you’re still kind of hidden and-

your heart drops to your stomach

because what do you see?  

yoongi laughing as lisa shakes her pom poms right in his face

she bounces up and down excitedly and you watch as he grabs her waist and turns her around

your heart clenches at the sight of him grabbing a basketball and gesturing for her to try tossing it into the hoop

but like

that’s your guys’ thing

isn’t it??

plus lisa’s really nice like you’ve spoken to her a couple times and she’s always been really sweet and genuine and you don’t have a legitimate reason to hate her because she’s per fe ct

water girl

that’s who you are

you wash his uniform

you give him water

sometimes you clean the changing rooms

that’s who you are

you aren’t anything like lisa

you’re not top of the class

you’re not best friends with like everyboDy

you’re not the damn captain of the cheerleading squad

and like

yeah

that makes sense

yoongi’s the captain of the basketball team of course his girlfriend is going to the captain of the cheerleading squad that’s just how the universe works

he’s certainly not supposed to be with the water girl

and wow

you are definitely totally about to start crying right now

oh my god girl

you shut the door quietly and let out a breath you didn’t even know you were holding

bed big disappointment energy am i right ladies

ha,.,., ha,.,

“okay, it’s fine, we’re good,” you mutter to yourself while blinking the tears away “we’re great, we’re fine! we’re cool”

whatever

u need to finish writing your paper anyway

“so like - can i talk to you about something?” lisa hums while yoongi dribbles the ball

he nods quickly and swooshes it into the hoop “yeah for sure! what’s up?”

there’s a moment of silence and lisa looks uncertain but she shakes her head and clears her throat

“i think… i think we should get back together.” yoongi freezes and is like hA,…,whAt,.,.., pARdon mE

“you… okay. um… why?”

lisa snorts ad steps a little closer to yoongi

and for some reason it feels like his feet are glued on the floor he canNOt move

“come on, yoongi. head cheerleader, captain of the basketball team - the stars are aligning for us!” lisa shakes her pom poms in his face before leaning in and practically nuzzling her nose against his and yoongi sputters and laughs awkwardly before grabbing her waist and flipping her around because she’s getting wAY too close “and, uh, i can’t be the only one in saying our sex was pretty hot too” she winks

yoongi’s cheeks flush and he looks away

like yea they had a thing but that was a while ago that was like first year second year ish

and it was never really serious in the first place yoongi established that with her

so it’s just weird that out of nowhere she’s like yA let’s geT back toGether

no

jesus

he’s not doing that

lisa is really nice and chill (and c’mon he’s not going to lie she was pretty good at sucking dick aND she’s very flexible) but like

….thank u, next

“you know, i… you’re really nice! and you’re gorgeous, there’s no denying it - i just feel like… you know, i don’t wanna lead you on or anything like that because i’ve kinda got my eye on- and that time was like- it was just something casual, you know… i… would love to be friends, though! and you know what friends do?? they, uh… they play a round of basketball with each other? why don’t you give it a shot?” yoongi grabs a basketball and thrusts it towards lisa before she has the chance to step closer to him

yoongi turns and looks towards the door when he sees a flash of movement

hm

well

you are disappointed

to say the least

all these years spent pining after yoongi because you thought you had a sliver of a chance only to realise that nO you don’t actually have an ounce of a chance whatsoever

so that’s put you in a pretty bitter mood

and when you’re in a bitter mood

you shut people out

you shut down

you turn into a robot

“what’s the matter with you?” jungkook raises his brow when he notices you poking at your lunch

you have mac n cheese today and you usually go ham on the stuff but for the last three minutes you’ve been poking at the same macaroni noodle

“what makes you think something’s the matter?” you stab your fork into the noodles and the table shakes from how aggressive you did it

jungkook raises his hands in defense and pops a grape into his mouth

“you… excited for practice?”

“why would i be excited? all i am is the damn water girl.”

jungkook snorts and is like okay dang calm down u angry troll

you shove your tray away from you “you can eat it”

“what’s the matter with you?” jungkook asks again and you shake your head before pulling your laptop out

“i, uh….” just had my heart shattered into a million pieces because of (1) min yoongi? “i’m on my period”

jungkook’s eyes widen and he looks around nervously

“oh,.., um…, want me to buy you some timtams?”

“timta- …tampons?”

“…is that not what i said”

thank god you have jungkook

he always cheers you up somehow lmao

youuuuuuu wanna leave

you don’t wanna be here today

you just have no energy to do anything

you don’t want to talk to anyone

you don’t want to see anyone

you especially don’t wanna see a certain someone

you’re going through your checklist to see if you have everything you need and to see if you’ve done everything you need to do

pump up the basketballs? check

polished the floors? got it

washed out water barrel? mmhm

“hey, y/n!”

recycled the cups from last time? yeppers

“hm, hey” you hum nonchalantly and tick another box

you look back up

you jump in surprise and the moment you realise it’s yoongi you immediately back up and bump riGht into the stack of cups and knock them over and your pen and notebook fall to the floor

“oh- here, lemme help-“ yoongi bends down and helps you pick up a couple cups that are rolling away and you are trying noT to scream right now

“it’s okay, i got it!” you grab the cups from yoongi “at lisa i didn’t- at least- at least i didn’t knock over the barrel of wateR” you chuckle awkwardly and stack the cups back onto the bench

he picks up your notebook and pen and sets it down near your bag and looks at you weirdly

“are you ok-“

“sorry, i have to fill this up! it’s only half full and we can’t have that” you hoist the barrel off the bench and this thing is like 98% full of water but that just won’t do

yoongi scratches the back of his neck and watches as you hobble off with the barrel and he doesn’t get the chance to catch up to you and ask you if he did something wrong because he hears the blast of the whistle and the sound of runners squeaking against the linoleum floors

when yoongi comes over to get a cup of water from you during the break he’s insuLTed when you ask namjoon to pass him the cup of water

what the hell did he do????

was it because,,.., idk was it because he helped you pick up your cups?? maybe you have a weird superiority complex with the whole water girl position

you know what

it’ll be fine

maybe you’re just having an off day

yeah

you’ll be fine tomorrow

okay

long damn story short

you are not fine tomorrow

you are not fine on the next day

oR the next

OR THE N E   X T

yoongi literally has no idea what the hell he did wrong

now usually when he has girl problems like this he deals with it just fine

most of the time he ends up ignoring the girl back because he doesn’t have time in his busy schedule to worry about a girl

but you’re different

you’re y/n and he

frick

he reaLLY likes you and he thought you liked him back for a while but now that you’re acting like this he’s not too sure

you literally go ouT of your way to not bump into him and not talk to him and it sucks!!!

he saw you in the cafe when you were paying for your food and you sLAMMEd some bills down on the counter and literally sprinted out of the dining hall and the lady at the register was like miss u just gave me like $50 for an apple a water and a chicken sandwich

it’s even worse during practice

every time he comes near you you immediately get up and walk in the other direction or you go and talk to another guy and he doesn’t know what to do!!1/!/1/1/1/1/!

the most he got out of you was when you accidentally bumped into him and you gave him a very timid sorry before scurrying away

yoongi does noT have time to deal with this and he keep trying not to be bothered by it but sweetie he is Bothered with a capital fuckin B

he tries not to let the irritation show on his face when you’re laughing at something with the other guys (especially espECIALLY kihyun) and when you make eye contact with yoongi the smile drops from your face and you get all weird

and now

well

now he’s mad!!!!!! he’s mad because he didn’t do anything wrong and to be frank you’re kinda being a dick

if he did something to fuck up you should’ve called him out on it like he wanTs you to call him out on it

and before he knows it

it’s the day of the big game

and when we say big game we meaN Big Game

the boys have been practicing for this all season

they’ve worked their way up to the top to get here to compete with the jaguars (that’s the opposite team’s mascot it’s pretty fckin basic lmao)

yoongi lets out a sigh as he adjusts his bandana in the little mirror in his locker

there are about five minutes before the game starts

he’s already feeling the pressure

as the basketball captain he’s like the glue that bonds the team together

if he’s grumpy the whole ass team’s going to be grumpy and that would not be good for morale

so he’ll push you aside for now and just focus on basketball

because ball is life right now and that’s all that matters

after this game he can go up to you and be like wtf girl what’s wrong with you

just thinking about you is making him angry

yoongi lets out a sigh of exasperation and pushes a couple strands of hair out of his eyes

okay okay

big day big game

suck it up don’t think about y/n

no need to freak out

he’s super calm

he’s super chill

everything’s gon be alright

“oh, uh, sorry, jungkook asked me to get his lucky charm for him” you pop up in the mirror behind yoongi and he immediately slams his locker shut and whips around

“okay, what’s the big deal?”

“um, i…” you’re visibly taken aback and he sees you look towards the exit

“doN’T- i swear to god if you run away from me again i’m going to scream” yoongi snaps and furrows his brows when you avoid his gaze

oh for christ sakes

“just TELL ME what the fuCK i did wrong because i’m struggling to understand what the hell is going on with you!” yoongi groans in frustration “every time i walk near you you run away. every time i look at you you look away. every time i ask for water you get someone else to hand it to me. i’m frustrated and i don’t fucking understand what the hell i did and you are SO irritating let me tell you for the past two and a half weeks you’ve been driving me insane and i-“

you don’t let yoongi finish because now you’RE mad that hE’S mad

“it’s because we-“ you gesture to both you and yoongi “we aren’t a match, alright?! i was crazy for even thinking i had a shot with you and i just feel so stuPID for thinking the captain of the damn basketball team would go for the water girl instead of the head cheerleader loOK the point is we aren’t compatible and that’s just how it is!”

and there it is

everything spills out of you in thirty seconds

the thing that’s been bothering you for the last two weeks is now out in the open

it’s just hanging in the air

yoongi’s gaze softens

“you-“

“min! two minutes!” the both of you turn when you hear coach bang and yoongi curses to himself

he needs like five more minutes to explain to you why your logic is so dumb and aLSO he’s not interested in the head cheerleader he’s interested in yOU and you do YOU DO HAVE A SHOT WITH HIM but you’re so damn stubborn and-

“after this game, i’m gonna quit my job as the water girl because coach bang said i’ve gotten plenty of credits already and we’re probably never going to see each other again and that’s just the way that life is supposed to be like. all peace will be restored” you exclaim sarcastically

yoongi wants to scream whY ARE YOU BEING so diFFICULT right now

“for the love of god y/n everything that you just said literally doesn’t even mak-“

“min! out here, now!”

“come on, captain. you have a game to win and i have cups to fill.” you move past yoongi and before he has the chance to reach out and grab you you’ve already headed out to the court

yoongi groans in frustration and immediately punches into the lockers

and now there’s a goddamn knuckle mark in his locker

o UCH

the locks rattle against the metal and yoongi cradles his swollen knuckles before cursing to himself

yoongi heads out and joins the boys in a huddle

he gets a smack on the back of the head from coach bang for being a minute late

“i’ll see you boys out on the court. don’t let me down.”

“alright people hands in the middle” yoongi clears his throat and sticks his hand in the middle of the circle and everyone follows suit

“what the hell happened to your hand?” jimin points out and yoongi shakes his head and ignores him

his knuckles are raw and swollen and it lookin kinda nasty

“on the count of three - one, two three - go team!” the boys all grunt out the chant before splitting off and making their way to the entrance of the gym

the crowd bursts into cheers and applause when the boys enter the gym

from across the gym yoongi spots his mortal enemy taeyang

he’s the captain of the enemy basketball team and he’s the woRst

and of course when yoongi needs to focus the most he can’t focus at all because of Y O U

you grin and wave at jungkook when he catches you standing next to coach bang

you and yoongi lock gazes and your smile falters but you give him a thumbs up

god you feel awkward

why did you think it would be a good idea to say all that shit to yoongi

now he’s just going to think ur weird

good one water girl

meanwhile

yoongi canNOt get you off his mind

he literally just needs one minute to explain this mESS to you but obviously he can’t do that right now because the game’s about to start

and he can’t noT think about you when you’re standing right there with your adorable cardigan and your stupid endearing smile and-

yoongi jumps when he hears the blast of a whistle and he’s about to jump up to grab the ball but the next thing he knows the captain from the other team is whooshing past him dribbling the ball like a maniac

“min! what’s gotten into you?? focus!!!” he hears coach bang scold him and yoongi curses to himself before running after the ball

shit

he’s playing the biggest game of the season and he can barely focus

“fucking shit” yoongi groans when the ball plunKS off the backboard and right into the hands of an opposing player

“yoongi, c’mon man get your head in the game” hoseok hisses and whacks yoongi on the arm “you’re not our captain for nothing”

“yoongi, pass me the ball pass me the bALL WHAT R YOU-“ the referee blows the whistle and yoongi pauses and looks around like ??

taeyang grabs the ball from him with a smirk “you’re the basketball captain, aren’t you? don’t you know travelling with the ball is a big no-no?”

wait what

yoongi travelled????? hE TRAVELLED??? LIKE AN IDIOT

meanwhile coach bang is sitting next to you with his face in his hands

you reach over and pat his shoulder “it’s, uh, it’s not too bad, coach! we’re just a couple of points behind” like literally the boys just need like two shots and then they’ll be back on track

“i need a drink” coach bang mutters and you offer him a cup of icy cold water with a sheepish smile

he grabs it from you and chugs it down before letting out a sigh “that’s not strong enough”

“…it’s water”

okay

so

the game is going

well it’s going okay(?) ish

overtime the boys score a point the other team scores like four more points

poor yoongi is definitely ouT of it

he’s tripped over his feet a couple times

he didn’t catch the ball when hoseok passed it to him for free throw

you know it’s kind of your fault but you don’t really know what to do

“let’s go, kook” you watch as jungkook speeds across the court but at the last minute passes the ball to yoongi and- oH OW

you wince when yoongi’s suddenly shoved by an opposing player and he literally skiDs across the floor

the entire crowd groans because that definitely looked like it hurt

“oOh that looks like it hurts someone should go and help him” you nudge coach bang and he blinks owlishly at you

“y/n that’s your job”

OH right RIGht

the referee blows the whistle for foul play and you immediately rush over to yoongi with your little first aid kit fanny pack

“are you okay??” the first thing yoongi sees when he rolls over onto his back is your face hovering right above his along with his concerned looking teammates anD coach

yoongi sits up and rubs the side of his head

when he fell his head literally just whacked against the floor so that’s great

the room is definitely spinning right now

there are cartoon birds flying around his head

“ugh, i’m fine” yoongi mutters

“your knee is bleeding and your knuckles are-“

“i said i’m fine.” yoongi snaps and winces

he reaches up and pulls away to see some blood smeared on his fingers

“y/n, patch him up in the changing rooms.”

“i don’t need-“

“yes, you do. take a breather, and when you come back, hopefully you’ll actually be able to make a simple shot.” coach bang raises a brow and gestures for you to take him away

ok ouch

he CAN make a simple shot he’s just disTRACTED OKAY

“i should be out there playing with everyone.” yoongi sits down on the bench and you sigh and drop to your knees in front of him

“calm down mr athlete, i’ll get you out there so you can play the last round” you respond quietly, pressing a cotton pad soaked with hydrogen peroxide to his knee

yoongi jolts from the sting but relaxes a bit afterwards

you wipe up the blood and patch a bandaid over it

there’s obviously a bit of tension between the two of you but no one knows how to address it and bring it up  

you clear your throat before sitting up a little so that you’re face to face “look, i, uh, i’m sorry. i shouldn’t have dumped all of that on you before the game but like i’m just a preTTY emotional person and i was feeling really mad and sad at you in that moment but u know what i don’t want there to be any bad blood between us because you’re super cool and i don’t want you to think that i’m insane i knoW i literally sound insane right now but the point it-“

“can you shut up for like thirty seconds?” yoongi cuts you off abruptly and you’re visibly taken aback

s coFF

rude,, but fair

you purse your lips and start to tend to the scrape on his cheek

“i like you.” he confesses boldly and you’re like o,,,oh “yeah, i like you. romantically. so how the hell do you think it makes me feel when you - out of noWhere - start to avoid me like the plague?? and after weEKS of avoiding me when i finally get the chance to talk to you you completely freAK out and start talking about how we’re not compatible and you start blurting out all this dumb shit and?? you didn’t even give me a damn chance to talk about my feelings and you didn’t give me the chance to ask you what the hell i did that made you act that way!!! it’s frustrating - you’re sO frustrating and it’s irritating me because usually when someone gets all weird on me i don’t mind like i honestly wouldn’t give a shit but i MINDED SO MUCH because it’s yOU and you’re y/n and you’re so sweet and funny and nice to everyone and i liKE YOU and i just don’t get it!!!!!”

“i, uh- okay.” you swallow and clear your throat

wha

is that aLL you have to SAY

yoongi’s going to give you a SECOND ANGRY RANT if that’s all you have to say jesus christ

“i think i- the thing is- okay i’ve just never felt this way about anyone before and it kinda freaked me out and then when the boys planted the idea of you liking me back in my head i immediately panicked and- look i saw you with lisa and i was just… i felt like i wasn’t good enough of you and… yeah. yeah.”

yoongi lets out a sigh

noW he knows why you were avoiding him like that

frickin finally

“lisa wanted to get back together, actually”

oh yikEs

you deflate a little

yoongi raises a brow at you “obviously it’s not going to happen, you dummy. she was getting all up in my face so i shoved a basketball into her hands to distract her.”

oh

“oh. cool. i knew that.” you mutter and wipe the dried blood off the side of his forehead before sticking a little bandaid there too “so is it… is it safe to come to the conclusion that we…”

“like each other?”

“like-like each other”

yoongi snorts and rolls his eyes playfully “yes. i like-like you and you like-like me. you like-like-like me”

you smooth the bandaid down and drop back down to lean against your heels

the two of you kinda just look at each other

it’s a nice moment of silence where the two of you are letting it sink in

ah yes

nice and calm

hoLY SHIT HE LIKES YOU BACK

YEEEASDSAJHDASKJDHSDJASHD HE LIKE S YOU BA ACK

yoongi smiles and leans down and riGHT before he gets to kiss you you raise your finger and press it against his lips

“you have a game to win.” you grin and get up off your knees and yoongi groans in frustration

“not even a good luck peck??” he pouts and grabs onto your wrist

“you don’t need the luck, but here-“ you bend down and give him a cute smooch on the cheek and yoongi already feels re-energized

yoongi grabs your hand and intertwines his fingers with yours as you guys make your way back to the court

you have to press your lips together to keep yourself from screeching

as soon as you guys get to the gym you let go of yoongi’s hand because if jungkook sees that he’S going to get distracted for sure

“alright coach, put me back in” yoongi taps coach bang on the shoulder and coach bang looks at him warily

yoongi’s smile drops from his face and he raises a brow “i promise- i pROMIse i am so much better”

coach bang looks over yoongi’s shoulder at you and you give him a confident thumbs up “he’s all patched up and good to go”

“one slip up and you’re getting benched.”

unsurprisingly

yoongi gets right back into it

travelling?? never heard of her

flawless jump shots? hook shots? bank shots? yoongi has them aLL in the bag

at one point yoongi dribbles past taeyang and manages to flip him off aND make a shot at the same time and taeyang’s standing there like what haPPENED

but you’re not going to lie

now you’re a little nervous

there are approximately ten seconds left of the game and the scores are tied

you’re standing there anxiously next to coach bang as you watch the clock tick down

oh no

oh fuck

they’re not going to make it they’re noT GOING TO MAKE IT

suddenly you see namjoon pass the ball to yoongi and yoongi ziPS across the court smoothly blocking and avoiding members of the opposite team

and it’s like everything happens in slow motion

yoongi tosses the ball

it hits the corner of the hoop

and spins around once

spins around twice

“c’mon, c’mon…” you mutter and bounce up and down on your feet

you immediately let out a screech of excitement when the ball swooshes into the hoop riGHT as the buzzer goes off

coach bang literally flings his clipboard up into the air and jumps up and down in excitement with you before he’s going over to join the boys

they’re all huddled up together and you laugh as you see them lift yoongi up into the air while yoongi clutches onto the trophy and plants a big fat kiss onto it

they let him down and they’re all fawning over the trophy

you grin when you see yoongi heading straight for you with a towel slung over his shoulder

“congratul-“ you don’t even get a chance to finish congratulating yoongi because the next thing you know he’s tugging you in for a kiss and

time seems to slow down

your eyes flutter shut and you grip a handful of yoongi’s jersey

you don’t even care that he’s sweaty and that his jersey is slightly damp because woWie he is definitely kissing u right now

eventually yoongi pulls away

“i like you - i like you so much and i don’t care if- if people think that water girls and basketball team captains aren’t meant to be together because i like you and that’s all that matters to me and-“ you lean up to give yoongi the smallest sweetest peck and his heart goes uwu when you nudge your nose against his

he blinks down at you owlishly and you smile like a damn fool

“i like you too” and you  say that with 120% confidence

“hYUNG we should knock you out more often if it gets you to play like thAT” jungkook grins and yoongi is like noOO no thank U

and then jungkook notices that yoongi… has his arms wrapped around your waist… and your arms… are hanging around his neckAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

his round eyes get wiDER and he literally goes like O o O and then O 0 O

“…does this mean i’m going to become a third wheel?”

thaT’s the first thing he’s asking about???

classic kook

“yoongi, kook! get your asses over here for a team picture!” namjoon calls out and you look over to see all the boys getting ready to pose for the picture

hoseok of course is in the middle clutching the trophy with a megawatt smile on his face

his smile is literally brighter than the trophy itself

you pull away from yoongi but the next thing you know he’s grabbing your hand and pulling you towards the boys

he turns to look at you with a smile “c’mon, water girl. you’re part of the team too.”

you can’t hide the big fat smile on your face

water girl

that’s who you are.

you understand why a lot of the girls are bitter and petty towards you

it’s because you’re surrounded by the cutest boys all the time

and you get to watch all of them work out in the gym

>:-)

boys will be boys

and boys like flexing and showing off to any and all girls

and so

“y/n! look! i can bench press 200!”

“y/n u wanna come watch me do bicep curls”

“Y/N U THINK I CAN THROW A DUMBBELL INTO THE AIR DO A FLIP AND THEN CATCH IT WITH ONE HAND”

…that one was kook obviously

and you usEd to give everyone an equal amount of attention

but things r a little different now

juSt a little bit

“i’m supposed to be studying right now” you giggle when yoongi bends down and gives you another kiss

somehow he convinced you it would be a good idea to lie underneath him while he’s doing push ups

he said it’d give him motivation and u know what

you will gladly take all opportunities given to u to kiss ur boyfriend

“you can study after i’m done”

“how many push- *kiss* -ups until you’re- *kiss* -done??”

yoongi pauses and holds himself up over you as he thinks about it

“i usually do like 100 pushups and we’re only at… 20”

that’s a lie yoongi’s already done like 60 pushups but

:::)))

“oH my god you guys are so gross”

“go make out in the changing rooms or something!!!”

“Y/N DO U THINK I CAN SET THE TREADMILL TO THE FASTEST SPEED AND RUN ON IT WITHOUT FALLING”

ya

so things are only a LITTLe different

your obsession with yoongi’s hands and fingers

you now have a reason as to why you’re obsessed with them

you don’t know how long the two of you have been going at it but all you know is that goddAMN yoongi is SO good with his fingers

“oh god” you whimper and arch your back against the mattress

yoongi pops his head up from in between your legs “that’s not my name but the praise is appreciated”

“s-shut up” you snort and it’s interrupted by a moan because the tips of his fingers brush over that spot and you immediately twitch

“mm, does that feel good? right there?” yoongi smirks and presses a gentle kiss to your inner thigh and you moan when you feel his thumb starting to circle over your clit

yoongi slows down purposely and relishes in the way your arousal covers his fingers

and yeah he said he wasn’t going to do anything else besides fingers (even tho u were clearly fine with him using his m o u t h if he wanted to but he didn’t want to overwhelm you because this is the first time u guys are doing things like this) but now he’s kinda feeling like he wants to do more than fingers

…

yoongi’s never been great at keeping promises so

“”oH mY God” you shoot straight up from the bed and immediately tangle your fingers into yoongi’s hair when he out of noWhere buries his face in between your legs

he clamps your thighs down when they threaten to close around him and snap his neck off and he’s sure he’s going to leave bruises on you but he’ll make up for it (and honestly u don’t mind because him marking u up like this is rly hot)

he starts moving with precision and you feel his tongue flick up and down against your clit and you are noT going to last long at all

“yoongi,” you choke out and your hips instinctively start grinding against his face “yoongi i think i’m gonna-“ you can’t even get a coherent sentence out because that’s how overwhelmed you are

“c’mon, baby - i’ve got you, you can cum” yoongi murmurs against your core and god his voice is dangerously low and raspy and that is your K I N K

he wraps an arm around your thigh before yanking you down the bed and pulling you closer to his mouth

the vibrations from his mouth are the last thing you feel before your orgasm hitS you like a ton of bricks

you cry out in pleasure and feel tingles up and down your spine and yoongi pins your hips down to the bed

for a couple seconds you’re pretty sure you black out

you pant and look up at the ceiling

welp

you are a changed woman because of min yoongi’s fingers and mouth

yoongi wipes his mouth with the back of his hand and smiles cockily up at you “i’m keeping these, by the way” he twirls your panties around his finger before shoving it into his back pocket

yoongi crawls up onto the bed and on top of you

“what’s the matter?” he coos and gives you a sweet kiss and you immediately whine and attempt to flip over and yoongi sees your cheeks flush even moRe “getting all shy on me, hm?” he grins and rolls off of you but at the last minute grabs your hips and pulls you on top of him

you mumble something while looking down at your hands that are resting on yoongi’s tummy

“what was that? didn’t catch that, jagi”

you clear your throat and yoongi’s eyes widen when you hook a finger on the waistband of his shorts

“i said i wanna make u feel good too” you murmur and look at him with your doe eyes and hoW can he say no to that face r u kidding me

spoiler alert: you too are very good with your hands and mouth

you like to think that an important stepping stone in your relationship with yoongi was when he did a body shot on you

well

okay it wasn’t a legit body shot because all you did was hold a lime up for him

but since then you’ve become a little more daring

which is how you find yourself with your tank top lifted up to expose your stomach staring up at the ceiling while jimin sprinkles a circle of salt above your belly button

you snort when jimin suddenly pops up above you with his cheesy grin wiggling a wedge of lime above your face

“this goes in your mouth this time” you hum and open your mouth up and jimin places it down gently “aLRIGHT let’s get this show on the road do we have anyone for water gir-“

“don’t even try it, park” you grin when you hear yoongi cut him off and then you feel familiar hands gripping your thighs apart and pulling you down the counter a little so that you’re pressed flush against your boyfriend  

jeez louise yoongi save it for laTER

you giggle when yoongi gives your outer thighs a little squeeze of acknowledgement

“alright, on the count of three! one, two, three-!” not even half a second later you feel yoongi’s tongue lick up against your stomach and you arch your back instinctively but he flattens his hand against you to push you back down

you get a brief glance of yoongi downing a shot before he’s tossing the shot glass aside and leaning down and taking the lime from you

he sucks on it for like a second before spitting it aside and smooshing his lips against yours

for a second you forget that the two of you are surrounded by other people and you instinctively kiss him back and open up when you feel his tongue prodding against your lips

your arms slither to wrap around his neck and your fingers find themselves getting tangled in yoongi’s locks

“THAT’S MY BEST FRIEND U PERV” yoongi starts getting swatted by kook and he immediately pulls away and raises his hands in defence “listen cap if ur going to take her to pound town at least wait til i’m not in the same house as her”

“jungKOOK” you groan

the second hand embarrassment is real

you’ve been spending a lot of nights at yoongi’s place recently because,,, duh

this benefits the both of u because his apartment is bigger than yours and his bed is comfier than yours and he gets to get you all to himself 24/7

yoongi rubs his eyes sleepily and his arm flops down next to him

he looks over

huh

you’re not there

he sits up quickly and furrows his brows

did you leave without telling him?

:(

oh wait

he spots your clothes neatly folded up and sitting on the chair and your phone is plugged into a charger

okay it’s fine no problem

yoongi hops outta bed and stretches his limbs out

he catches a glimpse of his bare back in the mirror and can’t help but smirk at the pinkish scratches down his back

he gives himself a mental pat on the back

he wanders into the kitchen

and the first thing he sees is you fiddling with the waffle iron dressed in nothing but hiS jersey and a pair of very cheeky panties

“hey you really need to clean this thing out like i see crumbs and dried batter and honestly it’s kind of nasty and i was really craving some waff- hEY” yoongi sweeps you off your feet and flings you over his shoulder before giving your bum a smack “yoongi!”

“we’ll make waffles afTERwards”

he can’t control himself

“after whAT??” yoongi practically yEETs you onto the mattress before grabbing your ankles and tugging you down a bit

“after wha- oh you knoW what”

you can’t help but giggle before yoongi’s smooshing his lips against yours “you really think you can walk around my apartment wearing this and expect me to do nothing about it?” yoongi purrs and pins your wrists above your head and you instinctively arch your back when he starts pressing kisses from your neck and then down your chest

he lets go of your wrists before moving over to sit against the headboard

you look at him like hey where u goin and he pats his lap “c’mere, pretty girl”

yoongi can’t help but grope your bum as you settle on his lap with your legs on either side of him

yoongi gives you a warning look when you bend down and teasingly brush your lips over his and you grin before leaning down and giving him a proper kiss

he wraps an arm around your waist and your body curves against him sO perfectly it’s insane

yoongi licks over your bottom lip and slips his tongue into your mouth when you moan quietly at the feeling of yoongi pressing himself right up against you

you roll down against his thigh and let out a whimper

when you go to take the jersey off yoongi grabs your wrist and stops you

“keep it on” he breathes out and you see the way his eyes are blown out

“k-keep it on?” you raise a brow and gasp when yoongi rolls his hips up into yours

“yeah, keep it on” yoongi pinches your chin in between his fingers and brings you down towards him for a kiss

holy shit

this is the best day of yoongi’s life

“a-aH, yoongi!” you’re riding him like your life depends on it and you’ve never looked hotter

yoongi growls and digs his fingers into your hips

yoongi’s jersey is sliding off your shoulder and your head is thrown back exposing your neck and exposing all the bites and marks that yoongi’s given you and jeSus he’s literally about to cum and he usually takes a hell lot longer than this to cum

“look at you, so eager for my cock” yoongi purrs and grabs a handful of your ass before giving you a pert smack “how badly do you need to cum, hm?” he’s honestly struggling to keep it together but one thing he knows for sure is that you have to cum before him

“s-so bad, soOo bad please yoongi” you gasp and yoongi takes that opportunity to slip his tongue into your mouth

yoongi’s already gotten two orgasms out of you so spiralling into a third one doesn’t take much effort

yoongi pulls away and looks down at where the two of you are connected and grunts when he feels himself getting closer to the edge as well

you convulse under the intensity of your orgasm and yoongi continues to move you up and down as he chases his own orgasm

“oh, fuck” yoongi curses as he feels you clench around him and he bites down on your shoulder

it only takes a couple more thrusts until yoongi’s reaching his own orgasm and lets out a cathartic groan

you feel his grip loosen on your hips and you bend down to rest your forehead on his shoulder as he rubs small circles on your back under the jersey

“…now i need to wash your damn jersey again”

“that sounds like a you problem”

you think the rest of the guys on the team are all super great

but sometimes

they take it a little too far

“oh my god, yoongi, harder, harder please-“ you whimper against yoongi’s mouth and his grip under your thighs tighten as he starts thrusting into you significantly harder

you had finished some of your water gal duties early and yoongi convinced you to come and take a shower with him because “you deserve a break too!!!”

and you told him nO funny business while we shower and he was all like ya babe for sure no funny business

next thing you know yoongi has you pinned up against the wall with his hands gripping you under your thighs and your legs wrapped around his waist and he is fucking you like there’s no tomorrow

you push some of yoongi’s hair back as he tucks his face into your neck and starts sucking marks on your skin “gonna cum for me, jagi?”

“yesyesyES” you gasp and your toes curl when he hits your g-spot and you immediately clench around him

fuck you’re so close

deciding to take a shower with your boyfriend was so worth it

and the two of you are like [this] close to reaching euphoria and all of a sudden

“rAAAAA” the shower curtain gets whiPPED to the side and you let out a scream because like haLF THE TEAM IS STANDING THERE

“oH my fuckin- can you pervs get the hell outta here??” yoongi growls and shields as much of you as he possibly can and you squeak in surprise because you are nAKED RIghT NOW

“hoseok you owE me a week’s worth of lunch i told you they were fucking in here”

“jungkook was the one who mislead me and said y/n was only in here to get our uniform!!!!!”

you snort and tuck your face into the crook of yoongi’s neck when the rest of the boys start whOoPing and wolf-whistling

you’re fine because yoongi has you completely covered but yoongi’s ass is definitely on display

you clutch your fingers around his shoulders and let out a gasp when he bounces you up a little to adjust you because you’re sliding down the damn wall

“oh eW YOU’RE STILL INSIDE OF HER” jimin groans and makes a face and yoongi’s like YA BITCH THAT’S HOW SEX WORKS U FCKIN MORON

“you guys need to learn how to keep it down if doing it in the showers is going to become a regular thing”

“ah, yoongi, harder!” jungkook mocks in a much higher pitched voice and you resist the urge to hurl the bottle of shampoo at him

eventually they leave and close the shower curtain again and yoongi sighs and leans his forehead against yours

you crinkle your nose “call me crazy but i think that kinda killed the mood”

yoongi groans and pulls out of you before letting you back down onto your feet

he was literally about to Bust The Fattest Nut and they TOOK THAT AWAY from him

“i’m gonna kill them”

yoongi’s figured it out

a reason why the two of you didn’t get together sooner is because you are literally the most oblivious person in the entire world

someone could make a neon sigh that said Y/N I’M INTERESTED IN YOU and you’d just blink past it

also

yoongi likes most of the guys on the team they’re all super chill

it’s just that some of them push his buttons more than others

for example

yoo kihyun

great defender and all that ya he’s a good team player

but he hAs to be the fuckboi of the century and that’s rich coming from yoongi

kihyun fully knows that you and yoongi are together but does he care?? nope

yoongi looks past jungkook’s shoulder at you and kihyun

jungkook’s talking to yoongi about how to do a bank shot but yoongi is very obviously not listening to him and is very obviously distracted

he can’t hear you or kihyun because he don’t got supersonic hearing but by kihyun’s body language he knows exactly what’s going on

“you look great in this shirt, y/n” kihyun reaches over and tugs on the sleeve and you grin before looking down at it

you don’t notice when he takes a step closer to you

“thank you! it’s actually one of yoongi’s shirts so it’s a little big but i think it’s cute-” you hum and look down at the faded print on the front of the shirt

“kook - i will be right back buddy” yoongi pats jungkook’s shoulder and moves past him

the anger is practically radiating off of him in waves

“-and also it smells like him!”

kihyun pauses but that doesn’t deter him

“and as great as it looks on you, i think it’d look a hell of a lot better on my bedroom floo-“

“hi, baby” you jump when yoongi suddenly pops up behind you and you turn around to glance at him

“hi yoo- mmph-!” all of a sudden yoongi yanks you in for a veRy heated kiss

he turns you around and wraps an arm around your waist and then he’s grabbing your arm and forcing it around his neck

“what’s gotten into you?”

“hush” yoongi breathes out and plants his lips against yours again and practically forces his tongue into your mouth and you’re like !!!!!!!!!

you’re dazed when he pulls away and flips you back around so you’re facing kihyun

“you may proceed” yoongi smacks your ass before he jogs back to jungkook and kihyun’s kinda standing there like,,,, uh,,,.,.,. i’m just gonna,,,., practice my dribbling or something

you give yoongi a glare and he blows u a kiss

classic

#getcha head in the game #i don't have the budget for a hsm x yoongi dance number #sorry #min yoongi #min yoongi fics #min yoongi smut #yoongi #yoongi fics #yoongi smut #bts #bts fics #bts smut #bts fic recs #bts smut recs #yoongi fic recs #yoongi smut recs #jungkook #taehyung #jimin #namjoon #seokjin #hoseok #hopefully u guys like this one!!

[lurafita]

It IS easy to kidnap Spiderman (If Peter Parker has to go to a board meeting)

This has also been posted at AO3, but I thought it might be good to have a back-up of the story on another website. Just in case.

Summary: Slightly crack-ish, not to be taken too seriously, mostly just written for fun. Peter has to go to an S.I. board meeting. Peter doesn’t want to go to an S.I. board meeting. Peter can’t come up with an excuse to not go to an S.I. board meeting. Peter needs a miracle. … Or, alternatively, a van full of kidnappers.

“I’m going to die!”

Peter whined as he, Ned and MJ crossed the street. Ned shot his best friend a somewhat sympathetic look, while the girl in the group rolled her eyes.

“You are not going to die because you have to sit through one measly big wig meeting.”

Peter ignored her.

“Goodbye oh cruel world. How heartlessly you rip me from existence.”

MJ folded her arms as they kept walking.

“You do realize that as the official heir to Stark Industries, you are going to have to deal with this stuff all the time, right?”

Peter dramatically gripped his chest, looking up into the sky.

“The lights… are fading… Limbs… growing cold… I see… a tunnel… Mother, is that… you?… Begging me.. to go… into the light?… Must. Move. Towards. The. Light! I am… going… Home… Goodbye cruel world! … Rose…bud.”

And then he gracelessly slumped against the store front to his left, slowly sliding down. Ned clapped politely, while Michelle kept frowning.

“Really? The possum from ‘Over the hedge’?”

Peter was up in an instant.

“Don’t diss the classics, MJ.”

And there went the eye roll again.

“My point stands. You are one day going to head one of the most, if not the most, successful and important enterprises in the world. You are going to need to learn how to do it. And like it or not, that includes sitting through board meetings.”

They stopped at an intersection, waiting for the light to turn green.

“But it’s gonna be so boring! They will be talking about market value and sales figures and the development of our sister companies and the possibilities of future trading partners, and I’m going to fall asleep, okay? I’m going to fall asleep right there, and then I will slide from the chair and crack my head open on the incredibly expensive meeting table, and then I will be bleeding out on the floor, - which is probably carpeted with imported, high quality, unicorn hair. And then everyone is going to look at me all judgmental like, and Pepper and Tony are gonna rethink leaving their billion dollar baby in the hands of a super spaz like me. And if I somehow survive bleeding to death on unicorn hair carpet, I will die of shame.”

The light finally turned and the three friends proceeded.

“Unicorn hair?” Ned questioned.

“It’s so soft!” Peter answered with huge, awe-filled eyes. “And you guys haven’t even heard the worst part! Pepper said I can’t bring Hope!”

Now his best male friend looked appropriately shocked by this absolute travesty, but his best female friend just continued to roll her eyes at him. Peter wondered if she ever got dizzy from it.

“Seriously? You are not allowed to bring your overly affectionate and enthusiastic dog to an important board meeting? What is the world coming to?”

Her sarcasm went right over the brunettes head.

“Right?”

Peter and Hope, his shelter rescue Pit Bull, had been pretty much inseparable ever since the teenager adopted the beautiful ball of barely contained love. The only times you would find one without the other was when Peter went out as Spiderman, or when he needed to go to school. He had actually tried sneaking Hope into school with him on the first day, after summer vacation had ended. Needless to say, that plan had been thwarted by the ever present eyes of Friday.

It was a bit of a miracle that Ned and MJ had been able to talk Peter into trying out that new diner that had opened up a few streets away from their school, without the other teenager running home first to bring his loyal follower with them. Though that had probably to do with Peter’s unwillingness to step foot in the tower until he absolutely had to. After all, there was always the chance that Pepper or Tony would just keep him there to further prep him for the upcoming meeting.

Ned nudged him playfully in the side.

“You know, most people would be fruit loops ecstatic about being gifted the inheritance of a multi-billion dollar company for their 17th birthday, instead of complaining about having to attend a meeting.”

Peter just loved that his best friend had picked up his way of swearing.

“I’m not trying to be ungrateful here, I just don’t see the point! After all, it’s not like I will be running any of those meetings once I take over.”

This statement was met with curious stares from both of his friends.

“And how do you figure that, loser?”

Said teen casually threw up his arms and intertwined his fingers behind his head.

“Well, I thought I would just hire you as the acting CEO, so, you know, you can completely dominate the business world and make everyone your little licorice. And everyone will of course include Ned here, who will be head of S.I. Robotics department by then, and yours truly, as I will be french frying around our biochemistry labs whenever I’m not 'on the web’.”

(Which was their extremely unoriginal code for Peter’s Spiderman activities.)

Peter was only slightly surprised by the twin slaps he received to both of his arms.

“The hell, Parker!”

“Dude, that’s not how you tell someone they have an amazing job waiting for them after university!”

To which he just shrugged his shoulders.

“What? It’s pretty much how Tony told me I was the god donuts heir to his and Peppers company. Well, actually he came into the kitchen on the morning of my birthday, while me and Hope were just enjoying breakfast after our early run, and dropped a stack of papers right before me. Then he waved a pen in front of my face and tapped it onto the bottom line on the paper on top of the stack and said: 'Sign here.’ So, naturally, I did, and as soon as I had finished signing, he snatched everything back and said: 'Congrats, kid. You are now the official heir to Stark Industries. Happy Birthday.’ And that was that.”

He immediately received another slap on his arm from MJ.

“You signed something without reading it first? What kind of a moron are you? That’s not how you run a freaking business!”

Peter pointed at her victoriously.

“See! This is exactly why I need you! You are already better at it than I am.”

He looked incredibly satisfied with his reasoning. Ned, who was still not completely over the shock of the metaphorical bomb their friend had just dropped on them, still couldn’t help but agree.

“He’s got a point, MJ. I mean, can you really imagine Pete here, sitting at the head of a table, filled with twenty suit wearing people, and telling them what to do? Face it, you are just way more intimidating than him.”

Peter was nodding along quite happily, though the girl only snorted.

“Please, a marshmallow stuffed cupcake is more intimidating than Parker.”

“Hey! I mean, that does sound ridiculously delicious so I’m kinda flattered, but still!… Do you think we can get that cupcake somewhere?”

Ned smirked. “Well, seeing as you are about to die a horribly pathetic death, I guess we can at least ask when we get to the diner. They are bound to have something overly sugary to satisfy your sweet tooth.”

And Peter slumped once more.

“Did you have to remind me of my impending doom? Why is there never an uprising of the mole people when you need it? Not that I want anyone to be in danger or anything, but a minor little catastrophe, to keep Spiderman occupied long enough to have a valid reason to miss the meeting, would be really, french fruit loops frying appreciated right now.”

And for once, it seemed like some higher power had heard and took pity on the spider-enhanced teenager. Because at exactly that moment, a black, large van was barreling down the street behind them, coming to a screeching halt right next to the three on the sidewalk. Peter instinctively took hold of both of his friends arms and drew them back behind himself, as the side door of the van slid open, and three masked men with guns in their hands emerged out of it. The other pedestrians on the street fled in a light panic at the sight of the armed men.

One of the men, apparently the leader of the group, pointed his gun right at Peter.

“You! Peter Parker! Get into the van, and no one is gonna get hurt!”

Peter looked at him with wide, stunned eyes.

“Are you… trying to kidnap me?”

The leader waved his gun impatiently.

“Not trying to. In the van! Now!”

And to the three kidnappers absolute astonishment (as well as their driver’s, who was still seated behind the wheel) the kid threw his hands up in the air, joyfully whooped, and then sprinted, actually fucking sprinted, right by them to leap into the vehicle. A timeless second went by, as everyone was trying to process what had just happened. (Well, not everyone. Michelle and Ned were simply sending their friend completely unimpressed glares)

Then the teen leaned slightly out of the car.

“Look, I’m not trying to tell you how to do your job or anything, but maybe we should get going? You know, before someone calls the cops? Just saying.”

That seemed to rouse the masked men from their confusion and spurred them into action. Before the door slid shut behind the last one, Peter pinned his two friends with a very serious look.

“Don’t call him! At least not before six o'clock!”

The meeting was scheduled for 18:30, and he was supposed to be at the tower no later than 18:15. He would never make it! With that gleeful thought, Peter relaxed into the backseat and faced the group leader.

“Do you think we can make a quick stop at a drive-thru or something? I was actually on my way to lunch, you know?”

And then Ned and Michelle were left in the figurative dust, as they watched the van speed away, transporting their friend to who knows where.

The inherently more worried Ned turned to his female companion.

“Should we… like call the police? Or Mr. Stark? Or the other Avengers?”

Michelle scoffed.

“Calm down, Leeds. The loser can handle himself. Besides, our future employer has given us strict instructions to not call anyone and report what happened just yet. We will shoot Stark a text at six. It’s not like he won’t find his idiot son in a heartbeat. Until then, let’s go to that diner, I’m starving. I’m also gonna have to research some meditation exercises or something. My future self is going to need all the patience in the world if I’m expected to deal with this kind of bullshit every time I have to drag Peter to a meeting.”

“Pep, Pepsi to my Coke, Pepperoni on my pizza, love of my life! Why do I have to go to the board meeting?”

Pepper ignored her fiance’s whining, something she had tremendous experience with, and instead held up another tie against the man’s white shirt, comparing it to the maroon one in her other hand.

“Because you thought it would be a good idea to announce the heir of Stark Industries on live television. And now the board wants to meet Peter.”

Deciding on the maroon tie, she laid the other one over the back of a nearby chair. Tony huffed as Pepper expertly bound a Windsor knot.

“Exactly. They want to meet the kid. Not me. They know me! Everyone knows me! My name is on the building.”

Having finished with the tie, Pepper grabbed the dark suit jacket next.

“It’s your own fault. If you had waited to reveal Peter as the heir to the company until he finished college, like you were supposed to, you wouldn’t have to deal with this now.”

Tony shrugged the jacket on and tried to look as innocent as possible when he countered with “I had no choice! Ellen totally tricked me into it.”

The flat stare his fiance shot him spoke volumes. “She asked you what exciting new surprises the next Expo held in store for everyone.”

To which the billionaire waved his hand dismissively. “Semantics.”

Pepper rolled her eyes.

“It will be a good experience for Pete. He pretty much knows all about the inner workings and procedures in the labs, but he needs to get to know the business side of things, too.”

“Which is what he has you for. Why do I have to be there?”

She adjusted the jacket, righted the tie and gave him a quick kiss.

“As moral support. And to set a good example. Which means no playing on your phone, no snorting or groaning noises when you get bored, and no rolling your eyes when Henderson brings up project 99.”

Tony groaned. “Henderson always brings up project 99. The guy is like a broken record. It was a bad idea the first time he proposed it, and it continues to be a bad idea now. Why is he even still on the board?”

“Because he is six months away from retirement and we wouldn’t be so cruel as to demote or fire him before then. And now stop whining and get ready. The meeting starts in twenty five minutes and Peter should be here any moment now.”

With an overly dramatic sigh, the man let himself fall backwards onto their king sized bed. Much to the displeasure of Hope, who had curled up on one of the pillows to mope until his favorite human came back again. “Sorry buddy.” Tony scratched the dog behind his ears in apology. Then he looked forlornly at the ceiling. “Why is there never an alien invasion when you need one?”

Which was, naturally, the perfect moment for Friday to announce “Incoming Video call from 'Boss Junior’.”

Pepper crossed her arms under her chest. “Oh, he better not try to get out of this meeting.”

Tony’s line of thought was similar. “He better have a damn good excuse for getting out of this meeting.”

The vid-link opened via the towers holographic screens, and the couples eyes immediately focused on Peter. Who was sitting in a badly lit room, empty of all furniture save for the chair the teen was tied to (with what looked like completely normal rope, which they knew Peter could snap like silly string), and behind him a tall, well muscled man, dressed completely in black, donning a black ski mask, and a hand gun pointed right at Peter’s head.

Now, a sight like this would usually propel Tony right into heart attack territory, - if it wasn’t for the big ass grin on the kid’s face.

“Hi Tony! Hi Pepper! So, as you can see, I have been kidnapped.” (Under his breath, Tony couldn’t help but concede “Damn, that’s a good excuse.”) “It was completely unavoidable and absolutely against my own will.” (Pepper groaned. “Are you kidding me?”) “I mean, of course it was against my will! Because who in their right minds would jump into a van full of armed kidnappers, when they have an important meeting to attend later that same day? Certainly not me!” (“That clever little shit!”)

By that point Hope had recognized his owners voice and was crawling all over Tony to get a better look at the holo screen, barking happily. Peter’s whole face lit up at the sight of his dog.

“Hey Hope. Yes, I miss you too. Are you a good boy for Tony and Pepper?”

And as Peter cooed at his dog, Tony tried to not have his nose constantly slapped by a wildly wagging tail, and Pepper was burying her face into her hands, the looming, dark figure behind Peter apparently decided that he had been patient enough with his 'victim’, and slightly nudgded the teen’s shoulder. Peter looked up at the man with a sheepish grin.

“Sorry, dude. Anyway, I’m supposed to tell you that if you want me to be returned in one piece, you need to transfer one million dollars-” Then Peter turned back to the man behind him. “Are you sure you only want a million? Think about it. You need to split this up between the four of you, which is only 250000$ for everyone. And you will have to withdraw the money pretty much right away, otherwise Mr. Stark will be able to follow the money trail right to you. Also, you will want to leave the country pretty quickly after this, cause, you know, that’s Iron Man you are dealing with here. But with that much cash in your possession, you can’t use a commercial flight, cause they check your bags and stuff and 250 grand would probably raise a few eyebrows. Which leaves you with the only option of paying someone to get you out under the radar, and that probably won’t be cheap… Have you really thought this through?”

The man looked at Peter (his posture had lost it’s threatening stance long ago), then at the person who was obviously holding Peter’s phone to record the video, then at Peter again, and then he made the universal sign to 'end the call’ at the camera and with that, the feed cut off.

Friday’s helpful: “The video call has been cut off, boss.”, was followed by “You have also received a text message from 'The Scary One’, which reads: 'FYI, your idiot son has let himself get kidnapped in order to avoid shameful death on unicorn hair.’ - End message.”

And while Tony had no idea what the part about unicorn hair could possibly be about, he had long since learned not to ask questions.

Pepper did not have to look up to know that her fiance was sporting a downright gleeful look right then.

“So… looks like the Spiderling needs rescuing.” He was edging off his seat on the bed (having deposited Hope from his lap earlier) and had already taken off his tie and suit jacket. “What terrible, terrible timing. And here I was so looking forward to talking about project 99 with good old Henderson. Such a shame.” He was halfway across the room, the Iron Man armor already forming around him. “Oh well, can’t be helped. Gotta go save Pete from his evil kidnappers now. Fri, locate his watch, please. Thanks, girl. Guess we will have to postpone this whole business meeting introduction thingy. Gotta get going before the kid accidentally teaches these guys how to be real criminals. Love you, Pep. Have fun at the meeting! Bye!”

Then the sound of the opening of one of the large windows, followed by the thrusters of the suit, and before Pepper even had time to wave him off, Iron Man was flying through the New York sky.

For reasons Pepper was quite comfortable never to examine, she couldn’t help but laugh. “Like Father, like Son. Both running from meetings whenever they can and leaving me to deal with it.”

A warm, furry body cuddled into her legs and she smiled as she lovingly pet the Pit Bulls head.

“You know what? Screw it. Peter is going to sneak you into one of those meetings sooner or later anyway. (And I will get him to attend one, he can’t get himself kidnapped every time). Better to get the board used to you. And if they can’t meet their future boss, they will at least meet his dog. What do you say, Hope, do you want to go to a boring board meeting with me?”

Her answer was an excited bark and a lot of tail wagging.

“Good boy.”

The End

I wasn’t actually sure how to end this one. There was always the option of following Tony to the hide-out the kidnappers had Peter at, just for him to burst in and see Peter (free of any kind of restraints), sitting in a circle with his kidnappers (all of whom had divested themselves of their ski masks), and explaining to them various ways on how to better plan their next heist. Or how to make money without using illegal means. Or giving them advice on going back to school/getting their GED (-that is what it is called, right?), or how volunteering at an animal shelter might help them with their parole officer later on…

But then I thought, nah, leave that to the imagination of the readers, or refer to it in a later part of the series if you want.

As I said in the beginning, this was basically written just for the fun of it. Never the less, I would be happy to know if you liked/enjoyed it.

Thanks to everyone for reading!

#peter parker #peter is a little shit #spider-man #spiderman #spider son #spiderson #tony stark #iron man #ironman #iron dad #irondad #pepper potts #pepper is a stressed mom #tony is a stressed dad #creative swearing #food as swear words #food swearing #domestic avengers #bamf peter #peter has a dog #crack #fun #fanfic #kidnapping #attempted kidnapping #confused bad guys #avengers #marvel #not infinity war compliant #not endgame compliant

[softstraykids]

lee minho|fuckboy au

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member: lee minho/lee know genre: fluffy & flirty summary: fuckboy au! best friend’s brother au! you were the one girl that minho could never get his hands on. and for good reason chan would kill him if he ever touched you but why would your heart not stop fluttering when he gave you that cocky and infuriating but completely heart melting smirk requested: nope but it’s minho’s birthday!! 

⋆ ──────── ⋆ ✩ ⋆ ──────── ⋆

minho was bad news for your heart

he was your high school’s residential fuckboy

and for good reason too

the boy had it all

he was gorgeous

to the point he could easily be a model

he had 8 best friends which stuck with him through everything

who all are of course gorgeous and constantly sought out by the student population

you still didn’t understand how good looking people all hang out together

do they just gravitate to each other?

anyways minho wasn’t just a pretty boy

he mostly got A’s on his reports

he was captain of the dance team

and vice captain of the soccer team

which meant crowds of girls would swarm the soccer pitch in summer in the blistering heat

to catch minho shirtless who always took his shirt off in summer  

he loved showing off

you always thought they were crazy like

air conditioning and ice cream over hot boys any day

chan the team captain and minho’s best friend would always get pissed off

he’d just shout across the field to minho

“KEEP YOUR DICK IN YOUR PANTS FOR AT LEAST BLOODY PRACTICE”

minho would just laugh and mock salute him

while chan would sigh and shake his head wondering why the hell he picked him as his vice

but none of the girls could interrupt dance practice

well more like they couldn’t get into the room

minho made sure it was keypad locked

since when girls could come in it was so loud because of all the cheering and screaming and no one could hear anything

plus jeongin always teased minho that the reason he keypad locked it was that there were more girls there for felix and hyunjin than him

you always thought the little devil had a point

but even with all this going on minho had time to do all his fuckboy ways

his snapchat CONSTANTLY spammed by god knows what sort of pictures

hookups at parties were a regular for him

the thing is minho didn’t even have to try

he would literally just look at a girl and do his signature smirk

and girls then just threw themselves at him

once he was done with them they’d usually cry or be upset

bad mouth him that he’s a fuckboy

but if he ever asked to simply just meet them again they’d go crawling back to him offering him everything

it was quite pathetic actually

though in the sea of all those desperate girls

there was you

someone he could actually talk to

someone he couldn’t help but want to know more about

someone who didn’t have to be a one night fling

but you were someone who was completely and utterly off limits

you were chan’s little sister

minho’s known you for years and you guys were close

though he never saw you more than a little sister

but that all ended a few months ago

minho and chan were in the living room playing video games

while you came from upstairs to get some cereal to snack on

you rummaged around your kitchen but you couldn’t find any of your goddamned favourite cereal

“CHAN WHERE’S MY CEREAL??” you shout

chan pauses the game then looks at minho

who looks like a deer in headlights with his mouth stuffed with your favourite cereal

chan starts laughing so hard

while minho keeps on hitting him to be quiet and putting his finger to his lips to tell him to shut up

you enter the room to see the back of minho but you could see YOUR cereal box on the coffee table

chan laughs harder as you enter the room

he looks between the cereal box, minho’s panicked expression and your murderous one

“you’re so dead minho” chan says comfortingly patting his shoulder

then escaping to his room

it was almost comedic the way minho turned around to you with wide eyes

you could see his adam apple bop up and down

“LEE MINHO WHAT DID I FUCKING SAY??!!! NOT TO EAT MY BLOODY CEREAL THIS IS THE FIFTH TIME THIS MONTH” you scream lunging at him

you quickly grab a pillow from the couch and start hitting him as hard as you can

not like it did anything good it was a bloody pillow

didn’t mean minho wasn’t over dramatic and kept on shouting

“OW OW OW CAN YOU STOP??!!”

you finally did once you felt your anger go down to a simmer

“wow someone’s on her period” minho muttered quietly under his breath

but you heard it

“lee fucking minho what did you just say” you whisper your voice dangerously low

pillow in one hand pointing at him like a sword

with your eyes narrowed at him

minho plastered on a fake smile and an innocent expression

“what me? i only said that how you’re the most beautiful and sweetest person to exist on this planet” he says sweetly shrugging his shoulders

“uh huh sure” you say rolling your eyes

you snatch your nearly empty cereal box and give minho one last glare before stalking off

just before you were about to leave the living room

minho called out “wait is that my t shirt?”

you spin around already eating your cereal

“well i stole it from chan thinking it was his but yeah it could be yours” you say like it’s no big deal

while minho was kinda just struck by some sort of feeling

you leaning against the wall

eating his favourite cereal out of the box

bare faced hair all messy from your pillow fight from earlier

in HIS t shirt which went a bit above mid thigh on you

you looked gorgeous

how did he not notice it sooner?

he always knew you were considered attractive

but like it never really clicked that you were ATTRACTIVE

smh dumbass

though he knew your personality was great

you occasionally hang out with the whole gang

you were funny and nice and had no problem talking back to any of the guys

you got along with everyone and amused all the guys with your witty comebacks

you also took care of the maknae line in the group and changbin

even though you were the same age changbin

but he acted younger than jeongin half the time

basically jeongin’s a freshman 00 line are sophomores changbin and you are juniors and the three hyungs are seniors

but he never realised how gorgeous you were

until now

“you look good” minho smoothly says his back turned to you

you thought you were hearing things

minho complimenting you??? has the world ended??

“wait what?” you couldn’t help but blurt out

he turned his head but not fully just enough so you could see his side glance at you  

“i said you look good in my t shirt” he ends with signature heart melting smirk

and that’s exactly what it did

melt you into a gooey puddle

not knowing how to respond

you shoved as much cereal as you could in your mouth making you look like a chipmunk

and just nodded then hurried off to your room

face beet red and heart beating a million miles a minute

minho couldn’t help but chuckle

gosh you were cute

in the next few months

minho flirted with you

a lot

and you were not having it

well you loved it but you hated it

GNSKSIFJ why was this boy doing this to you it’s like he liked torturing you

well he probably did

everytime he saw you he would give you a tight hug which made you never want to leave his arms

and he did that with every single hello and goodbye

that you could deal with

and you could also kinda deal with minho trying to hold your hand at any chance

“y/n you are actually slower than a snail hurry up!” he complains

then he swiftly grabs your hand intertwines your fingers

sO QUICKLY you can’t even process it

“yes daddy long legs” you huff out

minho’s smirk was more prominent than ever as he suddenly stopped

then brought you so close you actually squeaked

making his smirk even more cocky if that was even possible

he whispered so close in your ear that you could feel his breath on your neck

making you shiver and get tingles down your spine

“already calling me daddy huh?” he whispered his words literally dripping in innuendo and cockiness

his laugh which accompanied the comment sounded so pure and innocent compared to what he just said

i absolutely love minho’s laugh

It broke you out of your shock with your mouth wide open

he was already running down the corridor

as you shout to him

“Y-YOU LEE MINHO YOU GET BACK HERE RIGHT NOW SO I CAN DROWN YOU IN HOLY WATER”

me whenever he dances or acts sexy

these sort of incidents were a regular

and you couldn’t help it anytime he was near you

your heart sped up

but there were times without the constant flirty banter

and you loved it  

and that was when you really couldn’t deal with your feelings for minho

like when you went to get your favourite cereal in minho’s car

you guys got like 20 boxes and still finished it in a week

or when you two went on like a 2 hour car ride at 1am

and you guys were singing along to all the cringey 2000 songs so loudly the whole time

or getting drive thru junk food at 4am in the morning

you two got really close 

and you were falling for minho

but you were nearly a hundred percent sure he didn’t see you that way

you couldn’t of been more wrong

minho was going actually crazy cause of you

you were on his mind 25/8 if that was even possible

he knew he was falling for you and it frustrated him to no end

the LEE MINHO was falling for someone

and no matter what he did

all his tips and tricks

even with just blatant constant flirting 

you didn’t seem anywhere as deep as him and completely oblivious to his feelings 

not only was he falling for someone who seems completely disinterested in him 

then there was also chan

how the hell are you supposed to tell your best friend

you’re in love with their little sister and to give his fuckboy best friend a chance with her

minho couldn’t even get over you

he tried

so so many times

it was pathetic how many times

no girl could hold a candle to you

he literally cut off contact with any girl who wanted to talk to him in a romantic way

it just pissed him off

as cheesy and cliche as it sounds he didn’t want any other girl than you

everytime he saw you

he couldn’t help but smile and when he wrapped his arms around you he just wanted to hold you there forever

whenever he made you smiled it was the best feeling than anything else

gosh he was so in love with you

he was so wrapped up in his own world with you only on his mind

minho didn’t even realise he made a full choreography inspired by you

until felix and hyunjin mentioned it

they were at the dance studio 10 minutes early to dance practice 

and they watched minho dance to the choreography inspired by you 

just as minho finished 

“WOAHHHH HYUNG that was actually really good you should perform it in the showcase this weekend!” felix exclaimed

minho quickly shook his head and quickly said 

“no no no this is something i just came up with and it’s not really not that great”

“hyung what are you talking about?! honestly that’s the best solo choreography i’ve seen from you EVER” hyunjin said incredulously

minho looked between felix’s awed expression and hyunjin’s confused one 

he sighed “i just can’t perform this choreography i didn’t even realise i was making it until you guys told me” 

“why can’t you perform it?” hyunjin asks curiously 

“i just can’t” minho says not looking at the two boys not wanting to admit his crush for you 

“it’s cause of y/n” seungmin casually said walking into the practice room sipping his tea

i need a seungmin in my life

minho's brain literally stops working as seungmin says that 

“y/n? what do you mean y/n?” hyunjin asks completely confused 

“what does y/n have to do with anything with his choreography?” felix continues just as confused as hyunjin 

jisung walks in next well more like bouncing in as he announces loudly “minho’s in love” then sits next to seungmin 

minho’s brain kicks back into gear making him regret all his life choices 

“i fucking knew i shouldn’t of asked those two come to watch and give feedback” minho mutters under his breath sliding down the wall

“minho in love with wh-HOLY SHIT MINHO HYUNG’S IN LOVE WITH Y/N???!!!!” felix ends by shouting 

“what the actual fuck??” hyunjin slowly says still trying to process it 

“i can’t believe you idiots didn’t realise yet” laughs woojin as he enters with jeongin and changbin

“even jisung realised and it’s JISUNG” jeongin cheekily added 

“HEY I’M YOUR HYUNG REMEMBER!” protested jisung

“dumbasses” changbin says affectionately putting an arm around felix and hyunjin

most complicated love triangle ever

minho lifting his head out of his hands looked at the boys who entered

“was it that obvious?” he said like he was in pain

then chan walks in and minho heart plummets as chan smirks at him and amusedly says 

“very”

“u-uh c-chan i-” minho tries to start

chan laughs “minho’s it’s okay i’m not mad i’ve seen this coming for months"

“i just couldn’t help myself i’m sorry chan” minho sighs out leaning the back of his head against the wall

“oh stop being so dramatic i don’t hate you and weirdly i don’t disapprove of you and y/n being together” chan says lightly 

“w-wait what?” minho questions 

“has the lack of sleep finally gotten to your head” seungmin adds

“seungmin” scolds woojin

“yes yes i know unnecessary snarky comments don’t need to be said” seungmin huffs out

“have you not realised how much you’ve changed in the last few months?” chan asks minho like he’s an idiot

while minho just shakes his head 

“well to start off you don't take your shirt off constantly anymore” chan begins quite happy about the decreasing number of fan girls 

then all the members start contributing

“the biggest one for me was blocking all your trashy hoes on snapchat” changbin comments

“you haven’t hooked up with anyone recently either” jisung adds

“not even making out” hyunjin says dubious to the words coming out of his words

“you’ve stopped flirting with anything on two legs” seungmin drawls on

“i was not that bad!” minho protests

“YES YOU WERE!!” chorused all the guys 

“also you CONSTANTLY want y/n to hang out with us” felix says amused

“and you always stare at nuna like non stop” jeongin honestly adds

“the dead giveaway to me was you smiled like actually beamed of happiness whenever she even walked into a room” woojin ends on a romantic note 

“it doesn’t matter though she doesn’t even see me that way” minho says shaking his head

all the boys burst out laughing

“remind me how the hell did you get so many girls” changbin says smirking

“he’s probably lost his touch” jeongin adds sneakily 

“she likes you too dumbass it’s clear as day” chan says still laughing a little patting minho’s shoulder

“w-wAIT REALLY?!” minho bounces up and stands up excitedly 

“yes minho she really does” woojin assures him smiling 

“NOW will you perform the choreography and even dedicate it to y/n?” felix suggests

“yeah i will” minho says with his usual confidence looking forward to the showcase

all the boys bust their ass to help minho confess to you 

minho’s choreography wasn’t actually to a specific song

so the 3racha boys offered to make a song for the choreography

chan produced while jisung and changbin worked on the lyrics with minho

chan claimed he didn’t want to do anything to do with the lyrics not wanting to know about your private romantic life 

felix and hyunjin helped clean the dance and filled in for minho as dance teacher for the other groups performing 

seungmin, jeongin and woojin trained minho to sing really well for the track

just pretend minho can’t sing in this au or hasn’t tried to 

it was all ready for the showcase 

*showcase time*

you were loving the dance showcase 

you had front and center seat and you had some of the other guys sitting near to you including chan right next you 

minho was brilliant like he always was 

you couldn’t keep your eyes off him and you were so excited for his solo

felix, hyunjin and minho just finished their dance as a trio 

it was amazing they literally took your breath away 

like their technique and control over their bodies were ridiculous 

you hear jisung’s voice through the speakers as he was the mc for the showcase 

“hey everyone I hope you’ve been enjoying the night so far, this is actually our last stage for the night and it’s minho’s solo which everyone seems to be looking forward to!! so let’s welcome the man himself. give it up for miNHOOOOOO”

cheers erupted as minho walked on stage smiling, waving and blowing kisses 

you couldn’t help but laugh and roll your eyes

“thanks everyone for coming!! this is a really special performance for me, the song was produced and written by 3racha” cheers erupted once again at the mention of 3racha you could see changbin smirking from the corner of your eye

“i contributed to the lyrics though and woojin, seungmin and jeongin helped me sing and record the song too while my dance buddies who just got off stage felix and hyunjin helped with the choreograpy too”

he paused as people watching were cheering, all 8 boys were extremely popular and including minho were known as the kings of the school

“so this special performance is actually dedicated to someone” minho continues shyly?

wait minho was acting shy??

your heart plummeted as you thought he was dedicating the performance to some random girl 

you started to drown in your thoughts

but then suddenly minho looked straight at you and your heart almost completely stopped as he did 

with an almost nervous but still sweet smile he said

“this one’s for you y/n” 

you could of died right then and there and would of been so happy 

your thoughts were going over drive 

is this minho confessing to you?

does this mean he likes you?

what about chan?

just as if chan was reading your mind

chan whispered into your ear soothingly while squeezing your hand lightly

“y/n it’s okay i approve”

it felt like the weight of the world was lifted off your shoulder and you couldn’t help but beam at him as the lights dimmed 

except for the lights on minho

he started to dance to the music 

his voice was gorgeous much better than when he was screaming at the top of his lungs singing “APPLE BOTTOM JEANS BOOTS WITH THE FUR” at 3am

the lyrics and his beautiful dance moves went perfectly together but they also literally told the story of the two of you 

from you only being his best friend’s little sister 

to the one who wore his t shirts and got mad when he ate your cereal

to a girl who he wanted to get to know more

then to a girl who was like his best friend who he flirted with

finally to being the only girl he’s ever been in love with 

just hearing the story of the two of you and the fact your brother approved of you and even helped produced the song

emotions overwhelmed you and you couldn’t help but cry just as the dance ended

you were completely frozen but chan gave you a small amused smile and pushed you towards the stage 

and that’s all it took

you sprinted up there as fast as you could 

just as the lights turned on everyone saw you sprinting into minho’s arms

then he let out the most heart warming laugh as he spun your around into his arms 

as you clung onto him like he was your life line crying into his shoulder while laughing at the same time

everyone was cheering and wolf whistling 

he put you down gently 

and carefully tucked your hair behind your ear and tried to wipe your tears

“hey you okay?” minho says with an amused but soft smile

you just nod trying to stop crying but failing miserably

thank the lord you didn’t wear mascara 

he laughs sweetly at you 

“oh come on stop crying you look ugly when you cry” he says jokingly

“HEY!” you protest hitting him on the arm

“nah you’re always pretty” he says giving you a wink

“lee minho STOP FLIRTING WITH ME” you indignantly say 

“why? isn’t your boyfriend supposed to flirt with you?” he says smirking wigging his eyebrows

“i-i y-you m-my b-boyfriend?” you splutter out trying to process what he said 

he rolls his eyes but secretly he loves every moment of this

“yes idiot do i have to make it any clearer to you?” 

you’re just frozen still trying to process what the actual fuck was happening

“i guess i have to” minho says leaning forward smirking just before kissing you

and suddenly

minho’s lips was on yours

and you just completely melted into him

every crevice of your body perfectly fit with his

his arms were snug around your waist bringing you as close to him as physically possible

one of your hands was on the back of his neck bringing his lips closer to yours

while the other hand was lightly grabbing his hair messing it up 

fireworks, sparks, butterflies 

you felt all of it

the kiss was hot, passionate, sweet and steamy

kissing minho felt like the most natural thing to do in the world 

you just couldn’t get enough of him

but both of you finally parted remembering you both needed to actually breathe

foreheads together still hugging with heavy breathing and wide grins 

you could hear several of the guys commenting from the front row amongst the even louder cheers and applause

“EWWWWWWWWWWWWW” jeongin says squirming 

“GET A ROOM” chan shouts

“disgusting” seungmin shouts rolling his eyes

“wow i’m jealous minho will you be my boyfriend” jisung jokingly not says

you two barely even noticed what was happening 

you were so wrapped up in your own little bubble just the two of you 

“took you long enough boyfriend” you teased smiling 

“i know i was worth the wait princess” minho cockily says finishing his sentence with his signature smirk and another heart melting kiss 

⋆ ──────── ⋆ ✩ ⋆ ──────── ⋆

my gif take with creds!!

finally back with a scenario!! I have so many wips and requests I just needed to take a break from them and just let myself write. the result this fuckboy au!! i hope you enjoyed all the flirting, banter, and humor (these sort of scenarios are my fav to write). also requests are always open!! (this doesn’t mean i’ll 100% do it i might turn down your idea or write it!!)

as always don’t be afraid to leave me a message, a request or an anon!!! i always love hearing from you guys and getting your thoughts, feelings and feedback!!

 ⋆ ──────── ⋆ ✩ ⋆ ──────── ⋆

+ happy birthday minho!! i love you a lot bundle boy, your smirk always makes my heart melt, your laugh always makes me smile and i love your personality so so much. from your playful, savage, funny, affectionate, caring nature towards the members to your hard working, dedicated and professional attitude towards being an idol. but most of all i always love seeing you dance and being happy.

⋆ ──────── ⋆ ✩ ⋆ ──────── ⋆

#stray kids #stray kids scenarios #stray kids imagines #straykidznet #stray kids fluff #straykids #skz #stray kids scenario #stray kids imagine #lee minho #lee know #lee minho scenarios #lee know scenarios #lee minho scenario #lee minho imagines #lee minho imagine #lee know imagines #happyleeknowday #bang chan #kim woojin #seo changbin #hwang hyunjin #han jisung #han #lee felix #kim seungmin #i.n #yang jeongin #scheduled #ill be back in 2 days to properly answer anons & messages

[justmythoughtsinnit]

Bit disappointed in Nish Kumar

Disclaimer: I love Nish Kumar. I really really *REALLY* like him. I think he is a good guy and a funny comedian.

I first saw him on Taskmaster. At first I found him a little annoying because I thought he laughed too much. Then I realised maybe that was just nerves, or indicative of an honest personality, because I quickly grew to find him charming, intelligent, and an all round super cool dude (and gorgeous, but shhh).

Then The Mash Report came along, and hooray I thought! About time we had a decent show which could represent the frustrations of the left, with cutting, intelligent commentary and satire, without resorting to dumb or lazy jokes or clumsy pathetic stunts (Last Leg, looking at you).

Sometimes it gets it wrong, sure. Sometimes it is a bit naff, sure. But mostly, I’m on board, and mostly, I find it cathartic and vital viewing. So I was so glad when it came back on air a few weeks ago!

But I have noticed a trend which is bothering me - Nish seems to be developing a habit of making lazy “white people” jokes.

Disclaimer: yes, I’m white; yes, I’m triggered.

I guess I feel that making disparaging generalisations based on race is a crap thing to do, regardless of which way it is directed. But please don’t misunderstand me.

I don’t think racism is bad because it is mean. (even though it is mean). I think racism is bad because it is WRONG - and by that I mean, *literally false*.

For me, racism is not an issue of morality. It is an issue of accuracy.

 I don’t think racism is based on fear or hatred of “differences” - I believe insidious racist attitudes are usually laid on a foundation of lies and ignorance. If it were TRUE that minorities were stupid, or violent, then racism could be actually justifiable. But usually racism ignores facts or reality - which is why racism only serves to harm the cohesiveness and prosperity of society. Racism is bad because it is dishonest and misleading.

And in this post-truth era, I think a consensus on reality is important.

So it saddens me that Nish has taken to making lazy jokes about ‘white people’. I’m not sure it feels like it is always coming from a good place. It makes me feel defensive (yep, I’m a snowflake) but it also makes me wonder how poc who do not fit their supposed stereotype feel.

I have a black British friend who has two cats and loves them. I have a friend with Indian heritage who has an English surname because British colonisation was messy and fucked up and he is a living memoir of our nation’s shameful past.

Sure, of course there are some differences between race cultures. But for me, British culture isn’t about black-and-white. It’s about all of us with our messy DNA living on some islands and trying to get along.

Of course, race issues must be addressed in comedy. There is still institutional racism running thru every inch of our society. Sometimes it feels like we are going backwards rather than forwards. But race must be addressed carefully, thoughtfully, honestly. Because otherwise it is a dangerous game you are playing. Resorting to lazy disparaging comments is a slippery slope. Some of us have worked hard to banish that kind of thinking from our minds. It is weird to see it come back and have the applause of approval.

Racism sucks because othering generalisations are simply NOT TRUE. Sure, it might get a cheap laugh, but whether that is from shock value or genuine recognition is hard to tell. It is also hard to tell what deeper damager it is doing to people who are not your target audience.

Parliament has been told it needs to watch its language. I for one am fucking sick of the “us vs them” mentality which seems to underline everything right now. I don’t want civil war, I don’t want to play the blame game, I want a peaceful fucking outcome. I want solutions. I want us to realise we have more in common than that which separates. Whether on issues of race or politics or post code.

[actually, The Mash Report’s piece last week where they went to “The Grim North” and patronised everyone was x10 worse than any offhand comment from Nish. Hey guys, let’s ‘pretend’ to be racist, right - because racism and rudeness is fun, right guys?!?!!!]

Lazy generalisations are harmful, full stop. They cloud reality and cause division and hatred. I personally believe that repeating racist attitudes, even in jest, is harmful and keeps them alive for real.

The worst thing about all of this is that Nish seems like a nice guy... I thought he was smart enough to know all this already.

#the mash report #nish kumar #bbc2

[ask-the-cordium-crew]

the experiments behind closed doors (the sisters) a WKTC story

warning: 

my grammar and punctuation aren’t the best i hope you can understand 

as for a second warning this story is extremely dark it goes into details about the experiments the character dark mark also known as actor mark dose on two faunus sisters you have been warned i hope you enjoy the story! click the read more link for some extra info about this story 

experiment log: entry number 7 (the twin sisters) 

“this is mark Edward fischbach ...thanks to the help of rd. walts and Salem i was able to acquire two child sized tubes i also have the equipment to continue my experiments each experiment i attempt proves different results”

“the first 3 experiments attempted were complete failures subjects 1 and 2 died before transformation could even began dying from complete organ failure and blood loss what a pity.... it has been noted those with much stronger aura can endure much more punishment and can handle the transformation”

“subject 3 a spider faunus they seemed very promising at the start able to handle the torture and tests at first even the transformation into a skull fanger began with success sadly though in the middle of the transformation the subject appeared to die from complications with the venom beginning to be produced in the lower buttock the accelerated growth killed the man with in a few days once dead all further transformation stopped at a halt i learned that a subject needs to be alive for the transformation to fully take place”

“subjects 4 and 5 we’re more of a success but still... somewhat failures subject 4 was fed given water hell survived the transformation but... still remained enough of their mind to cry in a somewhat human voice and still had one human like arm left over from the transformation subject was terminated in fear they would over time gain their mind fully back subject 5? well subject 5 I've already well documented and has been ONE OF MY MOST SUCCESSFUL EXPERIMENTS YET!”

in the audio log recorded by mark he could be heard laughing loudly in a sadistic voice 

“... the dog turned into a complete beowolf alpha the only thing that remained of who she once was? hmm nothing major just a different colored pair of ears with this experiment i also sewed the woman's mouth closed while she was still somewhat faunus like and when she fully transformed her mouth had grown in to be unable to be opened leading to the newly formed beowolf alpha to be completely silent but still violent in nature they have no pack of their own”

“experiment number 6....  it would have been a most likely successful experiment if it weren’t for GOD DAM ABE COMING IN KNOCKING OUT THE TWO WHO ARE MEANT TO HELP GUARD THE MANSION THAT STUPID TRAITOROUS BITCH KILLED HER... now i have to watch my back knowing Abe will probably get help with taking me down but i know Salem won’t let that happen”

“but now onto my most recent experiment shall i?”

“day 1 Monday 10 am in the morning Dr. walts and hazel had brought the equipment into my home hazel of course was doing all the heavy lifting he didn’t know what all this stuff was for but thankfully did not question it Dr. walts had me sign a few things i payed him ten thousand Len hazel finished bringing the equipment in after 30 minutes before leaving Dr. walts gave me up to 50 gallons worth of the goop from one of the Grimm pits i thanked him and he soon left”

“day 1 Monday 12 pm me and my butler Benjamin had finished installing the equipment and now i waited in my lab telling Benjamin to go get the shipment that was due about now Benjamin was about to leave but i heard... emerald try and offer to get it for him he tried to deny but i came out i gave emerald a dark look but let her go get it she returned an hour later carrying it in struggling a small bit”

“she didn’t know what was inside but from the look on her face she clearly didn’t like what it was now why did she want to go and get my shipment? well she wanted to let Benjamin have some time to relax plus she did need some fresh air that girl likes to thing i am an idiot... she really left to get some time away from me thats why she took so long hmm... i do understand why she might want to stay away from me after what happened between me and her a few weeks ago hell... she was still healing from the incident”

“day 1 Monday 2 pm i had opened the create and let the two twin girls out of it they were two sheep faunus it seemed i gave them food and what else but they begged for their lives and asked to be brought home to their parents what pathetic little animals they’d be much better being what they should be treated as TWO MONSTERS WHO ARE ONLY GOOD FOR KILLING OR BEING KILLED BY SOME HUNTER OR HUNTRESS”

“of course i ignored them and after they finished eating at 2:30 pm i began the torture from the hours of 2:30 pm to 6 pm after torturing them they were given food and water inside bowls they didn’t deserve to eat like A HUMAN WOULD”

“Tuesday day 2 12 pm... i came into my personal lab and saw one of the girls outside her cage she seemed to have picked the lock with her hair pin i had not noticed before however the other girl was still in the cage hell she even tried to re lock it behind her sister my my she was so quick to rat her sister out her sister was about to yell at her younger sibling but i quickly grabbed onto her shirt and punched her till her nose was broken i snapped the nose back in place and shoved her back into the cage”

“the one girl who stayed in the cage i decided to reward with a small chocolate for staying where she belonged why would i do such a thing she was a rat after all well i wasn’t just feeling nice i liked how she knew there was no point in trying to escape i can respect a faunus when they know their place”

“hmm as for the other girl? well i damaged her skull with my attack i found out after an x ray scan that taught her not to try it again”

“Tuesday day 2 3 pm i came back and decided it was finally time to test out my new equipment”

“i had the girls undress into a pair of grey bras and panties i did look away after all i am still a gentlemen and well i might be a monster to Abe but i am no kiddie diddler that was too low even for someone like me after they changed i carefully set up some oxygen tanks outside the machinery and attached an oxygen mask onto both the girls not just that i carefully cut some holes into their necks and attached some feeding tubes along with IV drips into their arms”

“by 4 PM i had the terminals set up i made sure my equipment was working correctly the IV drips were working and the feeding tubes were working fine i then activated the submerge button filling both their tanks up top to bottom with the goop”

“thanks to my new equipment i could use cameras from inside the tanks to record for me how they changed over prolonged exposure to the strange goop that filled their tanks so i wouldn’t need to lift a finger besides replacing their IV bags and refilling their food and air”

“and thus the experiment finally began”

“day 3 Wednesday time doesn’t matter but it was early in the morning the first change began their skin began to change black i decided to still run a test on them both for the trouble making sister i carefully reached into her tank and put on some underwater headphones and exposed her to a constant broadcast of horrible sounds making her listen to the screams of past experiments begging for help and made her listen to myself constantly telling her she's useless no one loves her reminding her that her own flesh and blood betrayed her this seemed to have caused her to struggle with in the tank and her mind to be filled with anger depression and fear”

“as for the one who seemed to want to follow orders? i did the same thing however! i let her listen to peaceful music animal noises and words of encouragement on loop i made one feel loved and one feel hated and worthless wondering if this would affect their change”

“day 4 Thursday the next change seemed to have taken place over night the one given the negative feedback had her skull showing her skin slowly being removed from her face her eyes already a deep red and a glow starting in her mouth the top of her skull was partly cracked and hell her ribs along with her spine seemed to be starting to pop out of her chest”

“it seems the negative feedback was turning her into an apathy”

“as for the one with the positive feedback? her face was beginning to turn into a giant hole at the top of her head the sides of her face and the bottom of her chin their started to grow these large sharp almost spike like bones using her skull as a base i carefully used one of the mini cameras and looked into her mouth in her throat it was beginning to stretch out and appearing inside was 4 smaller spikes and of course everything was starting to turn into a deep glowing red” 

“... it seemed the one who was being treated good being fed candy and other foods that might cause acid reflex began transforming into a blind worm but oddly enough although she was starting to show signs of growth she wouldn’t fully fill the tank she would be a much smaller verion of the blind worm it must have been the fact she was still a child that made the growth only go so far”

“day 5 Friday food was no longer required for the one girl her arms were shrinking in size but growing in length and her fingers becoming very sharp and no skin left just bone her midsection near her pelvis area began to rip and tear soon creating holes see thru holes in the skin her eyes were now cold and red and it was beginning to be hard to tell she was even female let alone a faunus at this point hmm... though something odd happened because the fact she was once a sheep faunus her blackened skin was beginning to grow a black coat of fur her head was even beginning to be covered in it not much but enough to cover up the cracks speaking of her pelvis despite blood coming from it the bone had started to cover it like how an apathy’s pelvis is covered in an odd triangular bone her ribs had fully covered her chest at this point” 

“as for the other girl her face had fully transformed along with her head her arms and legs also seemed to slowly being converted into extra skin and a bony armor for her worm like body the headphones were removed from both at this point very carefully this girl didn’t need her breathing mask anymore her growth was starting to come to a halt but her body didn’t stop transforming yet however unlike her sister she was almost fully transformed and she wasn’t growing the weird wool like fur just a slimy coat of skin that seemed to burn my skin a bit upon touch” 

“a week later me and Benjamin loaded the Grimm onto my personal ship given to me as a present for my 20th birthday we kept the Grimm in the tubes as their transformation was complete they needed to be released thankfully the tubes were strong enough to hold them both”

“the older sister was a fully formed apathy the only thing that made her different from most apathy was the sheep like coat so she was dropped off in a small abandoned town in a frozen wasteland by dropped off i mean we were in the air we opened the hatch and let her crash to the ground letting glass break and her to escape hell it seemed their were a few apathy their already they didn’t seem to attack her i would have loved to stay and watch hell i am sure walts would have loved the footage but it was much to dangerous i knew what apathy were capable of”

“the younger sister was a very small blind worm fully transformed but no where near the size of a blind worm found in the wild though doesn’t mean she was small just means she barely was bigger than the standard huntress she was dropped off in a desert climate we did the same thing dropping her high enough so the glass would break but she wouldn’t be killed on impact of course after escaping she tried to shoot an acid like projectile at us but we escaped with barely any damages to the ship” 

“hmm i am disappointed in the fact these Grimm are never perfect but hopefully these differences would help them in combat one way or another perhaps these differences might even make them more deadly in some ways” 

“this is mark Edward fischbach otherwise known as dark mark signing off”

the audio diary ends 

this story is number 1 of 4 stories that will be released leading up to the anniversary of who killed markiplier 

this story was inspired by the comic series handplates by zara i hope you all enjoyed! 

#rwby #rwby au #rwby fandom #who killed markiplier #who killed markiplier au #markiplier fandom #who killed team cordium #who killed team cordium au #crossover au #dark mark #mark the actor #grimdark #warning: blood and gore #warning: abuse #warning: torture #transformation #grimm #apathy #blind worm

[hanscom]

💛-mermaids? Idk how specific i need to be but for the losers club lol

Everyone who’s from Derry has heard about what lives in the quarry.

There’s not a name for them. Those who are unimaginative (or perhaps just lazy) call them mermaids, but that’s not what they are, not really. Mermaids are supposed to live in the ocean - not in some small, dingy, manmade lake.

People come from all over to see them. All sorts of shops have set up downtown: quaint seafood restaurants with voluptuous, finned ladies as their logo. Gift shops with miniature blown-glass keepsakes. A visitor center with a half-dozen pamphlets, each with their own suggestions on the best way to see the creatures. Late at night, some say. Early morning, say others.

Personally, Richie thinks it’s all a big hoax. A tourist trap to drag people to Derry, to blind them with enough supernatural hope so they can’t see what an awful place it really is. They bring their children and entertain them with a few good hours of creature-hunting, and then the kids inevitably get bored of finding nothing, and so they move on. But not before they spend a few dollars in the McDonalds drive thru and at the gas pumps on the edge of town. These people keep Derry alive. They’re paying for a lie, but they don’t have to know that.

Richie works as a tour guide, of sorts. Mostly he keeps an eye on the quarry and picks up litter and occasionally saves a kid or two from drowning. He hates his job. He’s good at his job. He’s been doing this since he was sixteen. He’s almost twenty-eight now. Twelve years of this shit, and he’s never once seen them, these quarry creatures.

He used to believe in them. Every Derry kid did. They all got caught up in the magic, too young and dumb to understand that dull look in their parents’ eye, the way they didn’t quite believe what they were saying. That’s the way he talks now. The parents give him sympathetic half-smiles, but the kids latch on to his every word. He feels bad, sometimes, deceiving them, but it’s just harmless fun. Like Santa Claus.

It’s a Wednesday night in the middle of October, one of the slowest nights of the entire year. School is just starting to get serious. Kids aren’t worried about mermaids when midterms are coming up. Richie hasn’t seen a soul all day, but he kind of likes it like that. It’s peaceful down on the water when no one’s around. Cold already, but not freezing yet. Quiet. Sometimes the wind dips down into the quarry and makes a loud, hollow, miserable noise, but the air is pretty still now.

Which is weird, because he just heard a splash.

That happens, sometimes. There are fish in the quarry, and small turtles. But that sounded sort of big. Well, whatever. Maybe something rolled off the cliff and fell in.

Or maybe someone’s trespassing. Best to check. Just in case.

His boat is a little wooden single-person kayak. It floats perfectly on the water, used to his weight. He’s gotten good at rowing it, even when it’s stormy out and the water acts up. It’s calm now, but there’s that sound again. Splash! Far off to his left. The water ripples.

“Someone out there?” he yells, feeling stupidly like an actor in some bad horror film, the one that dies in the first ten minutes before the good shit even starts. He turns his phone’s flashlight on and casts the light onto the water. It reflects, suddenly and unexpectedly, off of someone’s face.

Richie jumps back so hard he almost tips the kayak over. A gasp tears out of his chest, raw-sounding. The person in the water flinches away just as hard, backpedaling in the water, surprisingly graceful. He has nothing to push off of but he somehow manages to dart back a few good feet, out of reach of the light cast by Richie’s phone.

“You’re not supposed to be swimming here,” Richie calls. He sounds braver than he feels. What kind of lunatic goes for a dip in mermaid-infested waters? Not that there really are any mermaids. But this guy can’t know that. He’s not a local. Richie has never seen him before.

The boy doesn’t say anything. Richie only knows he’s still there because he can hear the gentle way he’s treading water. His movement makes small waves lap quietly against the side of the kayak.

“You have to leave,” Richie tries, more forcefully this time. “Don’t make me call the cops.”

Richie can just barely see movement outside the perimeter of his flashlight’s reach. He leans in, trying to make his eyes adjust, and then jumps back again when the guy pops up out of the water, suddenly a few inches from him.

“Jesus!” he gasps, clutching his chest. “Stop doing that!”

The man smiles. “I’m sorry,” he says, but he doesn’t sound very sorry. He sounds like he’s trying not to laugh.

“Yeah, yeah,” Richie mutters, his heart still pounding. “Laugh it up. You done messing around now? You’ve played your prank, let’s go.”

The man bobs in the water. His movement is fluid. Seamless. He’s clearly a strong swimmer. Maybe he was one of those weird kids who always wanted to be a mermaid, and now he’s trying to come home to his real family or something. The thought almost makes Richie laugh.

He doesn’t say anything. A handful of strange, silent seconds pass. “Hello?” Richie says eventually, waving his hand in front of the man’s face, careful not to get too close. “Can you hear me?”

“I can hear you,” the man says calmly. “You’re very loud.”

Well, this guy is certainly not the first person to ever say so. “And you’re very quiet,” Richie points out. “You’re the one trying to sneak up on me.”

“I wasn’t trying to scare you,” the man says. “I thought you had left. You’re usually gone by now.”

The hair on the back of Richie’s neck stands up. This guy knows his schedule? Jesus. This might be worse than he thought.

Maybe he looks as terrified as he feels, because the man stares at him, cocking his head to the side. “Is something wrong?” he asks. “You don’t look like yourself.”

Fuck. Oh, fuck. “I’m fine,” Richie says faintly. How the hell is he gonna get out of this one? He’s a strong rower, but this guy looks like maybe he’s a stronger swimmer.

“Are you sure?” The man’s eyes are wide and dark, deceptively gentle. He floats closer to the boat and puts his hand on the side of it. Richie is half-afraid he’s going to tip it over, but he doesn’t. Instead, he says, “You look pale, Richie.”

Richie’s heart jams up in his throat. “You know my name?” he squeaks out, pathetically frightened and unable to hide it.

This strange man smiles a strange smile, like he’s humoring Richie. “Of course I do,” he says. “You’re the protector.”

The protector…? What the fuck is that supposed to mean?

“Dude, I just do what I get paid for,” he says, trying to sound calm and convincing. “I’m not, like, the guardian of the quarry. I don’t give a shit what happens to it.”

The man looks strangely upset by that. His face crumbles into a displeased frown. “That’s not true. You protect it.”

Richie shakes his head. “The only thing I do is make sure no one litters and that people stay in the designated swimming area,” he argues.

The man nods eagerly. “Exactly. You keep us safe.”

Us…?

Richie stares at him. “The only thing I keep alive in here is the wildlife. So unless you’re part fish, I’m not protecting you.”

Something twitches on the man’s face, something both amused and exasperated. “Isn’t that what your people say we are?” he asks. “Part fish?”

God. Oh, God. This guy is cracked.

“Are you trying to say,” Richie says, his voice shaking just the slightest bit, “that you’re a mermaid?”

The man laughs. “Of course not,” he says, and Richie would be relieved except he follows it up with, “That’s not what we’re called.”

Richie probably shouldn’t encourage this delusion, but he can’t resist. “What are you called then?”

The man considers the question. “Eddie,” he finally decides.

Richie’s eyebrows furrow. “You’re called Eddies?”

The man shakes his head. “No. I’m called Eddie.”

“Oh,” Richie realizes. “That’s your name.”

Eddie nods happily. “There are others,” he says, more talkative now, perhaps pleased that Richie is humoring him. “Stan and Bill and Bev and Mike and Ben.”

“Those are pretty normal names,” Richie points out.

Eddie smiles. “You couldn’t pronounce my real name,” he says. “We stole these names from humans. We didn’t think you would mind.”

Richie nods like he understands. God, he has a headache. He just wants to get this nut out of the water so he can go home. “Where are you friends?” he asks, just in case.

“Oh, they’re hiding,” Eddie says dismissively. “They’re scared of you.”

Richie almost laughs. Of all the ludicrous ideas, that one almost beats out mermaids. “Why? I’m not scary.”

“I know that,” Eddie says. “You’re good. But we’re not supposed to talk to humans.”

“Why not?” Richie asks.

Eddie levels him with a flat look like it’s a stupid question. “Because they want to hurt us,” he says. His voice doesn’t sound playful anymore. Instead it’s melancholy. Heart-wrenching. Ancient, like he’s actually much older than he appears. “They come here to find us, pretending they would be happy just to see us. But all they really want is to hunt us.” He peers at Richie and his expression suddenly clears. “You’re not like that, though.”

Maybe this is all a dream. Maybe Richie never really woke up this morning. Maybe he fell and knocked himself out and and this is all in his subconscious. Maybe this is a feverish hallucination. Maybe he’s dead and this is some really weird afterlife.

He pinches himself, just to be sure. Yep, still hurts. Eddie watches the movement, looking confused, and then understanding passes over his face.

“You don’t believe me,” he says. He doesn’t sound upset about it, but Richie is still half-afraid he’s some kind of lunatic ready to snap, so he quickly shakes his head.

“Of course I believe you!” he protests, but he must not sound very convincing, because Eddie latches both hands onto the side of the boat. He’s going to tip it, Richie realizes frantically and he tries to brace himself for the cold water. But nothing happens.

Well, nothing except that Eddie lets his body float away from the body, so that it’s almost horizontal with the surface. His head and chest are still above water, held up by his grip on the kayak, and his back and shoulders are strong and muscled and bare, but Richie isn’t looking at that.

Richie isn’t looking at that because there, past his waist, where there should be legs, there’s… there’s a tail. It’s long and wet and shining, reddish-brown, flecked with gold. It is scaly and thick and pulsing gently, keeping Eddie’s body afloat. It starts somewhere near where his hips should be, vaguely flesh-colored at first, and ends with a fin, split and delicate-looking. It comes up out of the water and then falls back with a heavy splash, and then disappears underneath the surface as Eddie rights himself again.

Eddie, for his part, looks rather smug. “I told you,” he says.

Richie opens his mouth to say something. Anything. But slowly, steadily, his vision starts to blur and go black. He doesn’t realize he’s passing out, and there’s no time to save himself from falling back into the water. He hears a shout and then a splash, and then, right before everything goes totally black, he feels someone grab him, solid and strangely warm, holding him up, keeping his face from sinking below the surface.

#reddie #reddie fic #sometimes i write things #prompts #i went a little harder on this than i intended to lmao

[sagexbrush]

keep your head up (i’ll lay my heart down)

or read it on a03

From: Unknown Number 

[9:30 AM]

hey so do u maybe want to talk about tonite?  

To: Unknown Number

[9:31 AM]

I think you have the wrong number.

From: Unknown Number

[9:32 AM]

wait so you’re saying this isn’t kayla?

To Unknown Number

[9:33 AM]

No, this isn’t Kayla. Looks like someone gave you the wrong number.

“Is Amy texting someone?” Gina asks loudly, peering over Amy’s shoulder.  She always has a habit of popping up in the most unexpected places. 

Amy jumps about a foot in the air and promptly shuts her phone in the nearest possible drawer. 

“On her personal phone?” Gina adds, helpfully. The personal phone was something that Gina and the others never ceased teasing her about. At first, they’d thought Amy was hiding something from them until she told them the reasoning behind it. 

She had gotten the advice from her first ever Sergeant. 

“You ever want to survive this place?” The older woman had said, “then keep two phones. That way you know if it’s a personal emergency or a work emergency.”

Amy considers that woman (wherever she may be) to be her first ever mentor, so of course she had two phones. That way she could also keep her work line clear for a real emergency. Except that her coworkers seemed to think it was hilarious to send gifs of kittens in the group chat instead of actual crime info (thanks so much Jake).

“It was just someone who had the wrong number,” Amy says quickly, before she can really think about it. 

“Oh Amy,” Gina says, shaking her head slowly. “You say that like it was supposed to make it sound better.” 

Amy makes a face at her. 

That’s when Jake approaches them. He doesn’t have the perp he was chasing down with him, so Amy assumes that his bust didn’t go quite as perfectly as he’d bragged. He’s holding his (solitary) phone and frowning down at it. “What are we talking about?” 

“Amy’s pathetic life,” Gina supplies helpfully. 

“It is not pathetic - “ Amy protests but Jake merely nods like this is a factual statement. “I can’t stand any of you people,” she says, spinning her desk chair around. 

“Gina I think you gave me the wrong number, are you sure this is what - “ 

“Jake, I am not your personal assistant.” 

She doesn’t check her personal phone until later that night. Really, maybe Gina is right. Amy is pathetic. She has a phone for work and a personal phone, and half the time she forgets that the personal phone exists. The wrong number text had been a surprise, for god’s sake. It was perhaps time to resort out her priorities. 

There’s only two messages: one is a text reminder from her doctor’s office and the other one if from the unknown number from earlier.

From: Unknown Number

[9:34 AM]

no no, i wasn’t trying to hit on kayla. kayla is my dad’s gf and she was supposed to tell me when he’s next flying thru.

Amy shouldn’t text back. Pathetic, Gina’s voice says in her mind. 

Ha, Amy thinks back. I’ll show you. I can have a conversation with someone outside of work that’s not family or Kylie. 

To: Unknown Number

[8:02 PM]

Sorry for assuming things. Sorry about Kayla. Sounds rough.

From: Unknown Number

[8:10 PM]

ah no you’re good. for the record tho, the ladies love me. 

To: Unknown Number

[8:11 PM]

Have you ever heard of humility?

From: Unknown Number

  [8:17 PM] 

only nerds know big words like humility

To: Unknown Number

[8:20 PM] 

That’s not even a big word.

From: Unknown Number

[8:22 PM]

send me a big word 

To: Unknown Number

[8:24 PM]

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious.

From: Unknown Number

[8:30 PM]

i see what u did there.

One failed case and a day later: Amy feels like throwing something at a wall. Or maybe something out a window. Or herself out that window. Or Jake. Yes, that’ll do. She’ll throw Jake out a window. 

“Do you want something Peralta?” She snaps, when she notices Jake is staring at her instead of filling out his arrest report. His successful arrest report, because of course he was successful today. (She’s conveniently forgotten about his failure yesterday.) 

“Only to ask if I should evacuate the premises because you look like you’re about to melt something with your laser eyes.” He’s clearly trying to be funny, his mouth quirked up in that infuriating smirk. Even his posture speaks of relaxation, leaned back with his shoulders slumped. Lucky him.

“Oh shut up,” Amy snaps. It’s harsher than she usually is with Jake and he recoils slightly in surprise. She allows herself to feel exactly two seconds of guilt and then refocuses on the task at hand. She can do this. She’s a Santiago, after all. 

Her concentration lasts for about three more seconds until her phone buzzes. 

From: Unknown Number

  [1:42 PM]

i realize this is a weird question to ask bc we’re not really friends but r u a girl? 

From: Unknown Number

  [1:42 PM]

not in a creepy way. i need advice on a girl situation and all my other girl friends know too much.

Amy looks up. Rosa and Charles are out on a stakeout, Holt is securely in his office, Terry is filling out his paperwork and Jake is texting someone on his phone. Surely no one would mind if she did some texting of her own. Jake wasn’t the only one could bend the rules. 

It’s with a sort of defiance that she continues their conversation. 

From: Unknown Number

[1:43 PM]

if it makes it seem less creepy, ur name is mary poppins in my phone.

To: Unknown Number

[1:44 PM]

You saved my number?

From: Unknown Number

[1:44 PM]

i promise i’m not a creeper you just seemed like a nice person to talk to

Amy hesitates, before adding his number as a contact into her phone. She looks for a moment at his real number…it almost looks familiar? She brushes that notion aside, it’s not like she knows that many people’s numbers. She’s barely memorized her mother’s. 

Besides, she was a cop. If this person tried to pull anything with her…well he’d find out the consequences the hard way. Amy Santiago wasn’t someone who could be messed with. 

To: Creeper?

[1:46 PM]

Okay. Shoot me your question.

From: Creeper?

[1:46 PM]

this girl i like is really upset today and i’m just making it worse. what should i do?

Ah, just Amy’s luck. The only boy who’s been even remotely talking to her out of work likes someone else. She changes his contact name almost immediately to something more fitting the circumstances

. If this was a romantic comedy, Amy would be the quirky one that both of the love interests loved as a friend.

(The character that usually ended up alone.) 

(AKA, story of her life.)

To: Lover Boy

[1:48 PM]

Ask her what’s wrong once she’s cooled off a bit. If it’s something you can help with, help her with it. If not, just give her some space. 

She shuts her phone in her desk drawer after that. She takes a few deep breaths while massaging her temples. The case file in front of her looks like absolute gibberish and that’s not even considering the fact that the perp got away. That she practically let him get away with her sloppy detective work. She goes to get another cup of coffee, even though it’s probably a bad idea at this point. It’s something warm to hold, at least. She couldn’t imagine the level of teasing that would ensue if she started drinking hot chocolate on the job. 

“Hey Santiago?” Jake looks a little less relaxed than before, but that infuriating smirk is never truly gone. She’s only seen him angry once, and that was when a police officer was trying to help his friend escape persecution. (She had been surprised to see that he did, in fact, have a range of emotions.) 

“My lasers have been deactivated,” she mumbles. “In case you were wondering, you don’t need to evacuate.”

“I was actually just going to ask if you need any help? Not that you’re not a perfectly capable detective, but a fresh pair of eyes might be of assistance?”

She’s too frustrated to note his adult vocabulary, instead disturbed by how much this appeals to her. It’s not a bad idea. It feels almost insulting to accept Jake’s help but… well for once he didn’t look like he was rubbing it in her face. He almost looked like he genuinely wanted to help. His entire posture is open, eyes almost sparkling a little bit. 

(Maybe she needs five more cups of coffee. With shots.) 

  “Sure,” she says, handing him the case file. “I had a lead on him this morning, but he got away. Now I have no idea where he could be hiding out.”

“It says here his favorite restaurant is the burger place by that seedy gas station?” Jake frowns. “How did you get that information?”

“Ex-girlfriend,” Amy says. “I asked the staff and they hadn’t seen him for several months. He’s been on to us at every turn.”

“Doesn’t mean that it still can’t be a good place to start,” Jake says, standing up. “Besides, you can buy me dinner after I solve your case.” It’s accompanied by a blinding smile, which Amy can’t help but return. 

“Oh in your dreams Peralta,” Amy rolls her eyes. “Just because I’m letting you ‘help me out’ doesn’t mean you get to take all the credit for the literal months of work I’ve put down.” 

Two hours they find the perp in a gas station near the burger place almost entirely by accident. He doesn’t get away again because Jake is blocking the other exit, slamming him down into the ground and grinning up at her.

“Looks like you owe me dinner,” he says, as he fastens the handcuffs about the perp’s wrists. 

Sometimes she forgets that police work is intended to have two people at all times. (That, and sometimes she forgets just how good of a cop Jake is.) 

She forgets to check her phone until she’s almost about to go to bed, head aching with exhaustion from the day. 

From: Lover Boy

[2:05 PM]

it worked. thx.

To: Lover Boy

[10:13 PM]

You’re welcome. Did you ask her out?

From: Lover Boy

[10:15 PM]

its kind of complicated bc i like her a lot but she hates me? idk. 

To: Lover Boy

[10:16 PM]

I doubt she hates you. You can’t always predict what people are thinking. Maybe she’s just pretending to hate you. 

From: Lover Boy

[10:17 PM]

maybe. 

To: Lover Boy

[10:18 PM]

I’m not going to get arrested for talking to you, am I? 

From: Lover Boy

[10:19 PM]

not unless ur committing a crime. 

From: Lover Boy

[10:20 PM]

im realizing now u meant other things. i’m thirty three. 

To: Lover Boy

[10:21 PM] 

I’m twenty-nine.

To: Lover Boy

[10:25 PM]

I was thinking, if you wanted of course… I could help you with this relationship with this girl? You don’t need to tell me any personal information or anything, I could just give you advice. If you wanted it.

From: Lover Boy

[10:27 PM]

your contact name has officially been changed to fairy godmother.

To: Lover Boy

[10:28 PM] 

Ha ha. You can tell my more about this dream girl tomorrow, then. I have to be at work early. 

From: Lover Boy

[10:29 PM] 

gnite fairy godmother

“Oh wow,” Gina says. “The personal phone is out on the desk today. Does that mean you’re waiting for a gentlemen caller?” She’s leaning against Amy’s desk and Amy is really trying to focus on this paperwork. She just needs Jake’s signature now. 

“Maybe,” Amy says, trying for elusiveness. 

“Oh honey,” Gina says. “Nice try.”

“Whatever,” Amy says. “It doesn’t matter. Don’t you have work to do?”

“Oh but this is so much more interesting,” Gina says. “Why don’t you let me try and set you up with someone again?”

“Last time you tried to set me up it was a nightmare,” Amy says. “My dating life is just fine, thank you very much.” 

Really, her dating life consists of binge watching Netflix TV shows and sad dates that her mother sets up for her. Gina can’t know that. Neither can Jake, who’s leaning across his desk to listen in on this conversation. 

“Are you waiting for a text from a boy?” he asks.

“Oh my god,” Amy says, cheeks burning. She slams the phone in her drawer. “Happy?” 

Gina saunters off. Jake scoops up his car keys and turns for the door. 

“Before you go,” Amy says, determinedly not looking at him, “I need you to sign this.”

He signs it way more quickly than she would have done, but he doesn’t leave right away. He lingers, his presence almost more of a sound than a sight. 

“Hey,” he says suddenly. Amy looks up. “I didn’t mean to - I wasn’t trying to make you uncomfortable.”

“Well great job,” Amy says in that sweet voice she reserves for true annoyance. This time the guilt lingers for slightly longer and then, “Sorry. I just don’t like how my dating life is a constant source of amusement for everyone.”

“I wouldn’t say constant,” Jake says, winking. “Just occasionally. Charles? You ready?”

She’s still glowering at her computer when she hears her phone buzz inside her desk drawer. She waits until Gina is securely in the break room to text anything back. 

From: Lover Boy 

[11:15 AM]

how do u tell if a girl is really annoyed or she’s fake annoyed

To: Lover Boy

[11:25 AM] 

Context clues, I guess. Were you teasing her about something she’s self conscious about?

“Loveeeeer boy?” Gina croons, appearing from seemingly nowhere. Amy jumps about a foot in the air.

“Have you heard of such a thing as privacy?” Amy hisses. 

“There’s no such thing as privacy when you’re holding your phone like that,” Gina says. “You’re practically asking for someone to look over your shoulder. Who’s Lover Boy, huh?” 

In hindsight, maybe Amy should have picked a different name for this mysterious man she’s been texting. Then again, it came with it’s side benefits. 

This next moment is one of the most satisfying moments of Amy’s entire career. 

“None of your business,” she tells Gina, and shuts the phone back into the drawer.

She waits until she’s off of work to look at her personal phone (mostly to rub it in Gina’s face when she can’t get anymore gossip than she needs) and spends as long as possible reviewing her brother’s latest message about his daughter’s preschool project before she goes back to their conversation. To show herself that she’s not attached to the situation, nope. Not at all. 

From: Lover Boy

[11:30 AM]

well she’s kind of self conscious about herself w/ other ppl sometimes. our colleagues tease her a lot and i kind of jumped on board w/ it sometimes.

You and me both, Amy thought. Turns out she had more in common with Lover Boy’s girl than she thought. 

From: Lover Boy

[2:30 PM]

according to my friend she’s apparently seeing someone else now

To: Lover Boy

[6:32 PM] 

Who?

From: Lover Boy

[6:33 PM] 

idk. she won’t tell us. we’ve teased her about past bfs.

To: Lover Boy

[6:34 PM]

Does she ever tease you back? Seem to enjoy your interactions?

From: Lover Boy

[9:45 PM]

srry i was drowning my sorrows. or am? the night is still young.

To: Lover Boy

[9:50 PM] 

Wow, giving up that soon?

From: Lover Boy

[9:51 PM]

no no no. ive liked thsi girl since like what feels like forever

From: Lover Boy

[9:51 PM]

i mean she’s like perfect. u know? smart and funny and pretty

To: Lover Boy

[9:52 PM] 

Then why are you getting drunk right now?

From: Lover Boy

[9:52 PM]

bc shes dating someone else again

To: Lover Boy

[9:53 PM]

Again?

From: Lover Boy

[9:54 PM]

ppl r always trying to set her up w/ some boy. idk y, but now ive missed my shot

Amy’s curled up on her couch with Harry Potter playing in the background and feels less lonely for whatever reason. It’s nice to feel like there’s someone else out there that could be completely failing in the romance department. 

For whatever reason, she really wants Lover Boy to succeed. Every rational thought is telling her that growing weirdly attached to some boy through text message is a stupid thing to do, but at the same time she couldn’t imagine giving up the easiness that’s sprung between them. It’s simpler than any friendship she’s had before. 

To: Lover Boy

[9:57 PM]

You don’t know that yet. There’s always a chance, and you can’t give up just yet. Tomorrow you should tell me more about her, when you’re sober. 

She goes to bed at a reasonable time, but it still takes two alarm clocks to wake her up. She has five drunk texts from Jake on her work phone which she ignores, and instead focuses on the personal phone.

From: Lover Boy

[1:30 AM]

okay did i tell you that she smells like dreams

From: Lover Boy

[1:30 AM]

dreAMS mySTERY INTERNET WOMAN

From: Lover Boy

[1:45 AM]

she also is like rlly funny. did i say that? nobody else thinks shes funny but i could listen to her talk all day long

From: Lover Boy

[2:30 AM] 

do u know how to delete messages from someone elses phone?

To: Lover Boy

[6:45 AM]

What did you send her?

She barely scans through the texts from Jake (something about smelling meadows? What was it with boys and their noses?) before she texts him back. 

To: Jake Peralta

[6:50 AM]

You sure you can handle coming into work? Need me to take over your cases?

She’s feeling overwhelmingly cheerful today. One, true love is possible (look at Lover Boy and the girl that was like her) and she was going to get to watch Jake Peralta with an extreme hangover all day.

She makes a strong cup of coffee and settles in to watch the morning news.

From: Jake Peralta

[7:35 AM] 

dont b ridiculous santiago in ur dreams

She rolls her eyes and begins to plot all the ways she’s going to make his hangover life miserable today. It involves loud noises, revolting smells, and a particularly irritating case that she thinks she can get Holt to make him work with her on.

Although, she has to admit that she’s impressed he’s awake this early. Maybe he hadn’t slept at all? 

Her personal phone buzzes. Finally, something she’s interested in. 

From: Lover Boy

[7:36 AM]

false alarm, she didnt read into it

To: Lover Boy

[7:38 AM]

I wouldn’t worry about. My colleague drunk texts me all the time. Including last night.

From: Lover Boy

[7:39 AM]

hav to sympathize w/ him i feel like death. were his drunk texts as good as mine?

To: Lover Boy

[7:39 AM]

No. He’s just an idiot, really. Probably will roll into work half an hour late because he was sleeping with some random person from the bar. He always does this. I just wish he’d stop sometimes and give me a break really. 

From: Lover Boy

[7:40 AM]

why do you care so much

Amy freezes. She’s too distracted to even notice that he didn’t use those childish abbreviations for once, her heart stopping in her chest. He’s absolutely right of course: why does she care? She does, in some weird part of herself that she hasn’t examined before. 

She really, really cares that Jake was probably out having a one night stand the night before.

From: Lover Boy

[7:43 AM]

srry if that was too forward. hangover

From: Lover Boy

[7:47 AM]

w/ this girl i like, i kept trying to deny it over and over again. it took me years to figure it out bc emotions are confusing and i still dont know what she means to me. so if ur going thru a crisis im here.

(Texting back feels like an acknowledgment, so she ignores it.) 

She is almost late to work, breezing in about the same time as Jake. He, predictably, looks like death. Which she doesn’t care about. She doesn’t care that the shadows under his eyes look as if they could swallow him whole, doesn’t care that his hands appear to be shaking slightly and for once he looks nervous. 

“Amy,” he says, before they can leave the parking garage. Why did they have to arrive at the same time, today of all days?

Not that it mattered.

Lover boy doesn’t know me.

“Yeah?”

“I was hoping you could give me some advice,” Jake says, scratching the back of his head. “You know. Because you’re wise and all that.” 

“What kind of advice?” 

“How to talk to someone advice. I think I said something wrong this morning, but I like talking to this person, and I don’t want to screw everything up -”

Amy bristles. She was sure he had probably said something wrong to whatever person’s bed he had rolled out of this morning. Well, she wasn’t about to be apart of it. Not that she cared. Amy Santiago didn’t care. 

“Look Peralta,” she snaps, “I’m not about to start mixing our personal and work lives because you screwed up with someone you met when you were drunk off your mind. And also? Stop drunk texting me. It’s not cute. I’m sure you did say something wrong, so maybe you should just apologize instead of talking to other people about it.” 

She stomps off, not even registering what she’s done until they’re in the morning briefing and Jake still isn’t there. 

“Has anyone seen Peralta?” Holt asks. Amy’s about to say that she has seen him when he stumbles in. He looks almost no different from this morning, but weirdly…damp?

“What happened to you?” Rosa demands.

“Splashed some water on my face,” he mumbles. “You know. Reopen the senses.”

“And you needed to soak your hair because…?”

“I was really tired, okay?”

“Enough,” Holt barks. “We will get back to the matter at hand…”

Amy approaches Jake approximately three hours later, when she feels like she can’t stand it anymore. She had been unfair, she knew she had. She was just…upset. For whatever reason. A reason totally unrelated to whether or not she cared. (Of course.) 

“Jake,” she says. He looks surprised and she reminds herself that she should probably use his real name more often. “Look, about earlier…”

“I get it,” he says. “Sorry. About overstepping personal and work. I just didn’t realize I was working with two Rosas.” 

“I’m sorry,” Amy says again. “I just had a rough morning. I took it out on you.”

Jake smiles at her. “You’re forgiven,” he says. “Now, can you go and be loud somewhere else? My head feels like it’s filled with nails.”

(She makes sure to drop a stapler onto the floor less than five minutes later. Just because he’s made her feel guilty didn’t mean she couldn’t have a little fun too.) 

From: Lover Boy

[8:15 AM]

idk what i messed up but shes rlly mad at me. drunk texts apparently a bigger deal than i thought. and i rlly didnt mean to offend u earlier, im sorry. 

From: Lover Boy

[12:10 PM]

jk. we’re golden fairy godmother. false alarm. but i rlly hope you can forgive me for what i said earlier, it was crossing a line. 

“Who’re you texting?” Jake asks. 

Amy looks up at him. It’s rare that they take their lunch breaks together, but their schedules synched up and now she has a closer proximity to Jake than she thinks she wants to. From this close, she can see each line around his eyes that radiates when he smiles. She likes his smile, but that’s more about his mouth than him. 

Lover Boy was ridiculous, she thought. Ridiculous. She didn’t like Jake Peralta. 

“A mysterious fellow,” Amy says.

Jake raises an eyebrow. “More mysterious than the dude with the mesh underpants?”

“How did you hear about that?” Amy demands. “I told Gina that in confidence.” 

“Hey - I’m just proud of you Santiago. It turns out you’re more exciting that I thought you were.”

“Title of my sex tape!” Amy says. “HA! You can’t take back that now!” 

Jake bursts into laughter and Amy thinks about how she likes how it shapes his eyes and mouth. About how she likes how it shakes through his entire frame and makes her stomach feel all warm and fuzzy. About how maybe she hopes that she could do something that would make him laugh like that again. Anything to make him laugh like that again.

Oh shit. 

To: Lover Boy

[7:15 PM]

Okay, so earlier you may have had a point. 

From: Lover Boy

[7:18 PM]

welcome to my personal hell

From: Lover Boy

[7:20 PM]

but maybe we can help each other? w/ this romantic hell i mean

To: Lover Boy

[7:22 PM]

That sounds like a good plan. Although I’m still not sure if this is anything. It might just be because you planted that idea in my head. I need to sleep on it. 

Knowing that she likes Jake is like knowing there’s a ticking bomb in the room. One, he thinks she’s dating Lover Boy (as does everyone else in the precinct) and two, he’s an idiot. How could she like him? This was not an Amy Santiago thing to do. Liking Jake Peralta wasn’t an Amy Santiago specialty.

Of course, Holt it sending them on an overnight stakeout together. Of course. It’s as if the universe decides the most proper way to make fun of her is to shove her into Jake’s face at every ample opportunity. 

To: Lover Boy

[9:30 AM]

We’re going to be spending an extended amount of time together for our job. Help.

From: Lover Boy

[9:31 AM]

tell me about it sis. i swear, my boss is out to kill me. like we often work together but this is a more personal thing…

To: Lover Boy

[9:32 AM]

Same here. Honestly. How do you think I should act around him?

From: Lover Boy

[9:33 AM]

be urself but w/ a dash of flirting

Hours later they’re sitting in the car and Amy can feel the ringing silence between them like it’s a real, tangible thing. How did you cross this bridge? The bomb is ticking louder. Amy is really, really terrible at keeping a secret. 

“So,” Jake says. “How are you and Lover Boy?”

Yes. First order of business. To clear up whatever Jake thought was happening between her and the mysterious ‘Lover Boy’.

“Will you please not tell Gina this?” Amy asks.

“Uh-oh.”

“I’m serious. I want to see you nod. Okay. I was never really dating Lover Boy. It’s just a name I gave this dude as an inside joke. Seriously. There’s nothing between us.” 

It was the easiest explanation anyways. It doesn’t even really feel like a lie. Sure, Lover Boy doesn’t know what his contact name is, but Amy doesn’t think he’d mind anyways. 

“Oh,” Jake says. “I won’t tell Gina.”

“She would have a field day with it,” Amy says. Her personal phone buzzes.

“Oh wow,” Jake says, slipping his phone into pocket. “Taking the personal phone on a work date? I mean stake out? I mean occasion?”

“Why are you being weird?” Amy asks, rolling her eyes. “And yes. This is the number my mother contacts me at.”

Jake laughs, and Amy likes the sound too much to care that it’s directed at her own expense. 

From: Lover Boy

[8:45 PM]

SHE SAID THAT SHE’S NOT DATING ANYONE

To: Lover Boy

[8:46 PM]

Be yourself with a dash of flirting. ;)

From: Lover Boy

[8:47 PM] 

was that a winky face?

Amy smiles and puts her phone away. Okay. Time to get her flirt…on? She tucks her hair behind her ears and turns to Jake. She could do this. Flirting she meant. Flirting was something that she, as a grown badass woman, could do. 

Liking Jake wasn’t something she could put in a list. She couldn’t make a list of all the things she’d say to him because he was simply Jake. He refused to be contained in a list like all of the other boys she’d had a thing for. (Maybe that was a hint of something more.)

He smiles back at her. “Why do you look so happy?”

“I don’t know,” she says, a bit too loudly. “Don’t you love stake outs? And hanging out with people? Friends?”

“Amy,” he says.

“Sorry I’m being weird,” she rambles.

“Amy - “

“I just don’t know how to say - “

“Amy,” Jake hisses, “It’s our guy.” 

To: Lover Boy

[11:27 PM]

That was a fiasco.

From: Lover Boy

[11:28 PM]

omg tell me abt it. maybe were doomed to be alone.

To: Lover Boy

[11:29 PM]

I don’t know. Maybe I overthought this and I don’t like him after all. You kind of planted that idea in my head.

From: Lover Boy

[11:30 PM]

well, what do u like abt him?

To: Lover Boy

[11:31 PM]

He makes me laugh. He’s actually a really good guy.  I really, really like the way he laughs. I don’t know to explain it. With everyone else it’s like they fit in this nice little box, but he exceeds all my expectations. I don’t know, I just came to this realization yesterday. 

From: Lover Boy

[11:32 PM]

i think you just answered ur own question, o wise one.

To: Lover Boy

[11:33 PM]

What went wrong on your end?

From: Lover Boy

[11:36 PM]

our job got in the way of us hanging out. plus i think she was trying to tell me something and i had to be a good person and do my job damn it

To: Lover Boy

[11:40 PM]

Sometimes that’s the best thing. You could always reach out to her. 

From: Lover Boy

[11:41 PM]

maybe. i think she’s asleep.

Amy’s about to turn in herself, but her work phone buzzes.

From: Jake Peralta

[11:42 PM]

i liked hanging out with you santiago.

Amy falls asleep smiling. 

(She forgets to tell Lover Boy about the text.)

“Santiago!” Jake’s third jelly bean gets her attention, mostly because this one hits her straight in the forehead. She’s trying to avoid him while she tries (and fails) to come up with a way to say, hey by the way I really like your face and your body and your hands okay? If she was Jake, she’d probably just say something like romantic stylez and make sure that the Z was plain and clear. 

“Seriously, Jake?” 

Before he can answer that question, Gina comes between them with the worst timing ever. 

“Amy - I have someone to set you up with!” 

Amy glances up. “What? I thought I told you I didn’t want to do anymore of your pity dates.”

She had confessed to Gina that she hadn’t been dating anyone named Lover Boy, and she had been unbearable ever since. Just because Amy wasn’t dating anyone, didn’t mean that she didn’t want to. 

“You don’t need to tell me you need it,” Gina says. “I know.” 

“If I do this, will you get off my back?” Amy asks. “Like for real Gina. I’m tired of you being on my case.” 

“That was a great detective pun, I’m very proud of you,” Jake says. He’s watching their entire exchange with the typical Jake Peralta attention span. Which means that he’s currently trying to build a small tower of jelly beans and barely listening to anything else. 

“Do you think I should go on this date?” Amy asks him. She isn’t sure why she’s asking him. What does she want from that? Him to say no? (Yes, her traitorous brain answers. Maybe Amy Santiago has a deeply romantic side after all.) 

“Do what you want,” Jake shrugs. Amy feels something like bitterness curling into her stomach. That’s stupid she thinks. You shouldn’t feel anything at all, she thinks. It’s not like Jake knows or anything. It’s not like he has any right regardless to tell her who she should and shouldn’t date. 

What a stupid question for her to ask. 

“Fine,” she tells Gina. “I accept your date.”

She’s going to put her all into this date, even though it’s the last thing she wants to do. That means heels and that dress Kylie swears makes her figure look like a hundred bucks. It means making her hair look like a goddamn cascading waterfall. 

To: Lover Boy

[7:20 PM]

I may have made a mistake.

From: Lover Boy

[7:23 PM]

oh my god me too. shes going on a date and i acted like i was okay with it! who am i

To: Lover Boy

[7:24 PM]

Well I actually am going on a date and he actually didn’t care that I was going on a date at all. So I can tell you right now that’s not the right approach. It sucks. 

From: Lover Boy

[7:25 PM]

do u think its worth the risk of just telling her how i feel. i dont even know if she likes romantic revelations

To: Lover Boy

[7:26 PM]

Probably. You seem like you love her a lot, and she’d be crazy not to love you back. Go get her. (And it’s hard to imagine anyone who doesn’t like romantic revelations.) Besides, if you truly fail there’s always alcohol. 

If only Lover Boy was in love with her, she thought wistfully for a moment. She couldn’t help but wonder what it felt to be loved like that. Whoever this girl was, she was lucky. She hoped that she realized that too. 

She’s going to be twenty minutes early but decides it’s ultimately worth it. It’s better than staring at her phone and waiting to see if everyone else had a happy romantic ending without her. What was next, her ‘single as a Pringle’ brother declaring that he was going to actually settle down? 

Maybe she and whoever Gina had set her up with could go on a double date with Lover Boy and his girl. She locks her apartment door tightly behind her before stalking out with purpose. Jake Peralta aside, she was going to have nice time. 

From: Lover Boy

[8:12 PM]

i missed her. shes already on this stupid date and idk where it is

From: Lover Boy

[8:13 PM]

like sorry to rant but also not sorry bc she’s absolutely my dream girl and now ive missed her forever and goddamn it. bc im sure whoever her date is will see that too.

Turns out, a nice time isn’t entirely possible. Amy’s in the bathroom, trying to escape her incredibly awkward date. Apparently Gina thought that just because Amy was a nerd that she’d be into…well… the sort of nerd that generally needed to move out of their mother’s basement. The kind of nerd that needs to learn how to take a shower. 

She’s frustrated. She feels like screaming because she wishes that she had been going on a date with Jake and doesn’t understand why. Or maybe she understands too much why. 

He’s her partner. She’s known him for years. She doesn’t need to worry if he’s hiding some weird secret from her because she knows almost everything about him. She knows more about his life than some of her brothers. She knows his favorite movie, how many books he’s read, what he likes to do to relax and the face he makes when he’s not. 

How could you know someone that well and still like them?

To: Lover Boy

[8:14 PM]

How do you know she’s your dream girl?

From: Lover Boy

[8:20 PM]

she’s smart and not afraid to back down from a challenge. shes such a dork and literally even the way she scrunches her nose is cute i swear. usually i tune out whenever someone starts to talk about books but literally i could listen to her talk all day and i dont understand y. she keeps me on my toes. i know like everything about her. 

To: Lover Boy

[8:21 PM]

It sounds like that should be pretty obvious.

From: Lover Boy

[8:23 PM]

my friend rosa says its a miracle nobody else knows yet. apparently i am v obvious.

Amy’s plotting on how to escape from the restaurant but freezes. Rosa? Her brain begins to make a frantic connection that she can’t quite comprehend. 

Don’t be ridiculous, she tells herself. Lots of people have friends named Rosa. It’s not like it’s a weird name. 

To: Lover Boy

[8:25 PM] 

You never said what you did. Maybe it’s the stress of the job that’s throwing her off?

From: Lover Boy

[8:26 PM]

im a detective

Oh god, she thought to herself. Oh. My. God. It was Jake. Lover Boy was Jake Peralta. It had to be. How many detectives were there that had friends with the name Rosa? That, and all the times she’d texted Lover Boy and seen Jake pull out his phone - 

She pulls out her work phone and clicks on Jake’s contact, pulling up his phone number and comparing the two. They’re exactly the same. 

“Oh shit,” she whispers to herself. “Oh my god. I am the worst detective.” And seriously, fuck the two phone rule. That is probably the stupidest thing she’s ever done. 

Embarrassingly, she began to cry. Well, this was the end of her stupid crush on Jake Peralta. He was obviously desperately in love with someone from the precinct: maybe one of the cops from downstairs? It wasn’t like she paid attention to Jake all the time. 

Of course it was never going to be her. Why would it be? 

From: Lover Boy

[8:27 PM]

do u think i should try again w/ her?

Amy hastily wipes away a tear. If there’s one thing she’s proud of, it’s her stellar moral compass. First, she changes his contact name. Then she rewrites the knowledge of this in her brain and promises herself that she can leave this restaurant with dignity.

If liking Jake Peralta wasn’t apart of the Amy Santiago Brand, getting her heart so brutally destroyed by him certainly seemed to be. 

To: Jake Peralta

[8:30 PM]

You should go for it. You deserve to be happy. 

She means this of course. She’d always scoffed at this in movies: just tell him how you feel! In the end, it’s not that simple. It’s not worth complicating a good friendship because she might love (like her brain frantically corrects) him. 

She ditches her date and doesn’t even feel guilty about it. Sue her. She’s heartbroken, she thinks. She deserves to treat herself. Instead she grabs a cup of her favorite hot chocolate from the cafe on the corner and plans on tucking into her bed with her favorite Harry Potter book.

She’s even gotten to the point where she’s kicked off her heels and is holding them by their straps. She’s pretty sure her mascara is smeared all across her cheeks and her hair is tangled but who cared? She was being self pitying. Even the barista had given her a discount when she’d seen her approaching.

“Rough night?” She’d asked and Amy had nodded. A rougher night than anyone had intended, really. 

She thinks at first the person sitting outside her door is Kylie. It takes her a few seconds to realize that it’s not her because A, she hadn’t texted Kylie and B, it was obviously a guy. 

Which is why she’s instantly mortified when her brain makes the connection and finds Jake Peralta sitting outside of her apartment. He’s dressed in his usual work ensemble and looks really put together compared to her. 

“Jake?” she squeaks. “What are you doing here?”

“I’m - are you okay?” He asks as he takes her in. He stands immediately and reaches a hand toward her to what? Comfort her? It simultaneously soothes the raging nerves and enrages then. Amy nods, feeling her chin wobble slightly like it does when she’s about to cry. “I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” Jake asks. “Did something go wrong on your date?”

Everything, she wants to say. Then she thinks: what is the point of pretending anymore? “Did she say yes?”

“Did who say yes?”

“I’m your fairy godmother apparently,” she says bitterly, pulling out her phone and waving it in his face.

“What?” 

“You know, when you were trying to text Kayla? You were texting my personal phone,” Amy says. “I didn’t know it was you, because we didn’t tell each other our names but yeah. It was me.” 

“That was - that was you?” 

“Apparently,” Amy says. “Did the girl you like say yes? Let me guess, it was Sandra from downstairs -” 

“Sandra?” 

“It doesn’t matter,” Amy says. “I’m chill, bro. You know. Chill.” She takes a sip of her hot chocolate and promptly burns her tongue. Smooth she tells herself. Wow. How are you even single? 

“Well how about you and your mystery man?” Jake demands. “Was it Chad?”

“Chad? My mystery man,” Amy scoffs.

“Well then, who was it?” he crosses his arms over his chest.

Damn it all to hell. She was done with not burning bridges for the sake of maintaining awkward friendships.

  “It was you, you idiot.” 

Jake’s eyes go wide. “…Me?”

“Yes,” Amy says. “I know. Whatever. We can just go back to forgetting about it now and I’m officially only going to have one phone now - “

“But Ames - I was talking about you.” 

She blinks. Her brain is moving sluggishly. She can’t quite comprehend what he’s just said to her. When she finally gets around it to it she opens her and mouth and closes it several times.

“Me?” she finally stammers. 

“Yes, you,” Jake says. “Oh my god. We are the worst detectives ever. It’s official.” He’s smiling for whatever reason, as if this is a massive joke. Was it April fools day today? She couldn’t remember. 

“But you can’t like me!” Amy protests loudly. 

“Oh I do,” Jake says. “I like like you Amy Santiago.”

“But all those nice things you said about her - “

“Were about you,” Jake says. “I swear. I swear on my reputation as a detective.”

“About me?” She asks, feeling another tired tear escape from the corner of her eye. 

“And all of your texts - those were about me? Including the ones where you said I was an idiot?”

“I think we’re both idiots,” she says, rubbing her forehead. “Oh my god. We may as well hand the best detective title over to Rosa or Charles.” 

“Might as well march over to Holt and turn in our resignations now,” he says, and despite herself she’s laughing. She’s laughing, laughing, laughing. So hard that her stomach feels like it’s about to burst and then he’s laughing too and both of them are careening toward each other like magnets. It ends with Jake’s mouth being awfully close to Amy’s and Amy’s chest being awfully close to his.

“I’m crazy about you Amy Santiago,” he says. “For real. And all of those things I meant, I meant.” 

It’s not eloquent, but Amy wouldn’t want it any other way. 

She remembers to drag him back into her apartment before she kisses him, real and properly. 

(Later, she says it back. “I’m crazy about you Jake Peralta. For real.”) 

To: Jake Peralta and Amy Santiago

From: Gina Linetti 

[11:30 PM]

if you guys aren’t together by now I’m going to riot. Also Jake, I have Kayla’s real phone number when you want it. If you want it. (She seems like kind of a bitch.) 

To: Gina Linetti and Amy Santiago

From: Jake Peralta

[11:31 PM]

DO NOT TELL ME YOU PLANNED THIS

To: Jake Peralta and Amy Santiago 

From: Gina Linetti

[11:32 PM]

i told Amy i had the perfect guy for her. 

#my writing #Brooklyn 99 #pertiago #amy/jake #fanfiction #woo hoo

[trollhunter-nomura]

Ch 6.5 was the Valkyrie a changeling?

Who will win, who will die, the fight ensues! Split this one in 2 parts cuz it was too long for Tumblr

...

Early in the evening, just hours from sunset, Bular, Strickler and another changeling by the name of Otto Scaarbach stood before the completed Killahwad bridge. Otto was ready to put the final piece on, the Eye stone.

"We are about to make history." He said almost giddy.

"Be quiet and hurry up, impure! " Bular growled. Otto bowed and climbed to the top of the bridge, inserting the final stone.

The bridge glowed an eery white light and a veiled doorway appeared to open. Within the smoke was a large shadowy figure. Bular knealt on one knee, followed suit by Strickler and Otto.

"Father!" He cried out, almost in pain.

"My son, it has been too long." The voice from the other side was deep, eerie so.

"We have finally finished the bridge, all we need now is the trollhunter amulet!"

The shadow shifted. "And where is the trollhunter now?"

Bular clenched a fist, "Whoever they are they have eluded me for months now. We have not been able to even identify the human who has it."

" The trollhunter is human?" Gunmar seemed curious. "Yet it seems the changelings are failing at such a simple task. Perhaps you should get more competent changelings? "

Strickler paled at the implications.

" You're right father, I should get right on that."

Bular stood and pulled out his swords, backing Strickler to the corner.

"Bular, please..." Strickler started, knowing it was pointless.

Before Bular could act, their attention was drawn to a noise at the entrance of the room. Nomura stumbled in, looking very worse for the wear. Her arm hung limp at her side, possibly dislocated, and She had a bleeding cut on her cheek, which she had to coerce Draal to give her. It's not like she could have gotten a convincing one from Blinky or even the pacifist.

"Nice of you to join us, Nomura." Otto said snidely. "You are just in time to have some fun."

Nomura acted in pain, leaning against the wall at the entrance of the exhibit. She bit back the smile, knowing he was far from wrong.

"You're late, impure." Bular growled, turning his attention to her.

"With good reason, Bular." She turned her hand upward to show the amulet. The others stared in shock.

"Merlin's amulet! How did you get that?" Otto asked the million dollar question, the blue light reflecting on his glasses.

Nomura shook her head, "The trollhunter was here last night. Wiped out the entire nest of goblins. I managed to get this in the fight. "

Well it was mostly true. Strickler slipped away from Bular and snatched the amulet from her hand.

"My Lord with this we can take Arcadia!" Strickler shouted, holding the amulet out.

While Bular insisted he would do the honor of freeing his father, Nomura quietly fixed her shoulder knowing the impending fight would go better if she had both arms. She just hoped her hunch was correct.

Once the amulet was inserted into the bridge, it seemed to react negatively. Rather than releasing the gummgumm king, the bridge seemed to reject the amulet all together, and it went flying out smacking Otto square in the face, shattering his glasses. The amulet rolled to a stop at Strickler's feet. He picked it up to look it over.

"Explain what happened, impure!" Bular shouted in the room, now dark and silence due to the bridge being rendered inert from the loss of the amulet.

"Daylight is... HER'S to command!? The trollhunter, it won't work without the trollhunter!" He said with urgency. " Nomura, where is the trollhunter, what did you do to her? "

Nomura rolled her shoulder to alleviate the stiffness.

"Do to her? Interesting you should ask." She walked closer to Strickler. "I'm glad that my hunch was correct, that if anyone else were to use the amulet against my will, it wouldn't work. I found it funny how it happened, I mean seriously Scaarbach."

The pudgy changeling was still rolling on the ground clutching his face from the glass that pierced his eyes.

"Explain yourself impure, you try my patience." Bular said lowly, jumping from the top of the bridge.

"Explain? How about I just show you instead?" She held out her hand and recited the oath. To the surprise of at least two of the occupants of the room, she was suddenly adorned with the glowing blue armor.

"You?" Strickler asked in awe.

"How could an impurebe the trollhunter?" Bular growled, hatred in his red eyes.

Nomura shook her head as the sword appeared in her hand.

"Call me 'impure' all you want Bular, but I will still shove Daylight where the Heartstone doesn't shine." She gestured to the sword in her hand as she walked over to the entry way.

"You think you can take us both by yourself?" Strickler asked, shifting to his troll form and reaching for a handful of his feather quills.

"Of course not, that's why I brought this." She slammed the blade against the support rope, causing the curtainto fall revealing three other trolls: Draal, Blinky and ARRRGGGH.

"Traitor!" Strickler made a lunge for her, which Draal stopped.

"I'll take care of this one!" He shouted knocking the smaller troll out of the way.

Good thing, because at the same time Bular made a move towards her with his twin swords both which Nomura narrowly parried. He swing both simultaneously, forcing Nomura to backflip out of the way. She was going to need a second sword in this fight. As she tried to get an opening, one of Bular's blows knocked Daylight out of her hand, which vanished as it skidded across the floor. Nomura did a few flips backwards to be out of the way, and instantly shifted to her troll form, armor shifting to accommodate the new form.

"Master Nomura what...?" Blinky trailed off at the sight.

"Don't worry about me, you and ARRRGGGH take care of the bridge!" Nomura shouted drawing her khopesh swords. Now she was more in her element, and it should make for a fairer fight.

"Ah... Right." Blinky and ARRRGGGH went towards the bridge.

Bular charged towards her and she charged back, now on even grounds with fighting. As the fight wore on, her dodging and blocking blows, she found it hard to find an opening. Plus with the fight in the museum, there was supposed much going on, so many things getting wrecked, she had to get him out if the museum. It was a good thing she disabled the security cameras earlier that morning. She chanced a look out the window to see it still daylight, so instead she dove thru the maintenance hatch nearby. This would have been where Draal and the others got to the museum safely.

"You are pathetic Bular, you had victory within your reach, only to have it snatched away so easily." She taunted, before jumping down the hatch. She stood in anticipation waiting for Bular to come after, and after hearing his roar, she knew her comment enraged him.

The fight went on in the sewers, blow after blow on both sides blocked and parried. Nomura grew frustrated. She had to find an opening, but even so, her khopesh alone would do nothing to the gummgumm. She used the wall as leverage to jump over Bular, much like the first time she faced him as the trollhunter. In his momentary distraction, she pressed a hidden switch on her scimitar which released a foul green poison. With creepers sun she might actually win the fight. She threw one blade at him in an uppercut movement which he blocked easily, but left him open. She slashed low at his abdomen, and made contact. The khopesh snagged on his belt, but the poison made contact. It was far too soon to celebrate tho, as with a Bellow of rage he lunged at her, one hand on his open wound, stumbling thru a grate.

In the momentary quiet. Nomura picked up the fallen khopesh and followed him thru the opening. She saw nothing, heard nothing, as she went thru the opening and eventually finding herself in the canals. The sun was still up, but approaching sunset; the sky turning orange. She still saw no sign of the burly troll. She stuck to the shadows, ears turning to catch the slightest noise.

Without warning a clawed hand wrapped itself around her throat, and in a fast movement shoved her into the sunlight. The sun's rays forced her to her human form. She clawed at the now stone hand wrapped tightly around her throat. Looking down she saw Bular at this point was half stone. The poison was acting slow.

"Tour fool poison may finish me, but I will take final pleasure in eliminating you. And when I fall, I will be remembered. There will be nothing to remember you by impure." His voice was growing stiffer as the poison seemed to be reacting inward to out.

She was certainly running out of time. Her vision clouding, black spots bouncing around. She kicked at the air, futilely. She couldn't breath, and almost couldn't think. She suddenly had a revelation, remembering what Draal had told her not long ago. 'The armor and the blade is a mere extension of your body. You have to expect the unexpected, and learn to embody the armor. Force it to do what you want.' As her vision grew darker, she wanted to do anything to wipe the smirk of victory from the troll's face. She felt the warmth of the Daylight sword appear in her hand, and in her last seconds she slashed at the gummgumm, causing the arm wrapped around her throat to disconnect from the body. Before she lost total conciousness, she saw a bright explosion of his body being destroyed.

...

Draal followed the trail of battle thru the sewers to the canal. He looked around the area and noticed the pile of rocks nearby. Sticking to the shadows he approached the scene. He noticed the rocks were what remained of Bular, and it felt as if a weight had been lifted from his chest. But where was... He noticed her, lying in the sun, lifeless.

"Nomura!" He called out.

He noticed her skin was almost the same color of her troll form's flesh. That was when he realized stone hand clenched about her throat. He heard a slight ticking sound too, realizing it was coming from the amulet, and it was slow. He had to act fast, taking note that she was in full sunlight. Without another moment's hesitation, he reached into the sunlight to grab her leg, feeling the burn of the sun pierce his right arm, and pulled her into the shade. Then he quickly crumbled the stone around her throat. Freeing her from it's grip.

Within a few seconds, the amulet spun wildly before the whole of the armor glowed brightly, as if jump-starting her. Nomura jackknifed off the ground with a deep breath, curling in a tight ball, coughing to catch her breath. Draal barely registered the motion, as his dead arm was ripped off his body. Nomura sat up, trying to catch her breath. She took in her surroundings, realizing the half burnt half petrified remains of Bular around her. So she did manage to finish him, good. She rubbed a hand around her throat wondering how she got out of the choke hold. That's when she realized her company.

"Draal what are you..." She trailed off taking notice of his arm, or at this point, lack thereof. "What happened to your arm??!?"

Draal helped her to her feet.

"Well, you were unconscious in the sunlight, I had to act quickly before you actually died." He rubbed at his shoulder. It hurt but didn't hurt.

Nomura didn't understand. She pinched her nose, her head had started pounding due to the sudden regaining of blood flow.

"But, why? If I'd died, you would have gotten everything you wanted. Bular dead, and a chance to be the trollhunter. I'm sure you would have been next in line!"

" It didn't seem right to become the trollhunter like that, it wouldn't have been right."

" Oh, suddenly your HONORABLE??" She shouted.

Draal seemed to act sheepish. "I deserve that."

Nomura shook her head, rubbing her forehead. She really wasn't in the mood for this conversation right now. She held her hand up to just cut off the conversation.

"Forget it. Where are Blinky and ARRRGGGH?"

"They should be finishing moving the bridge to Trollmarket by now. The green changeling I was fighting managed to escape in the chaos."

Of course he did.

"Strickler was always a coward. What about the other changeling?"

Draal shook his head. "I did not see any other changeling's in the room."

That didn't make her happy, but atleast they got the bridge.

"Terrific. We should get to Trollmarket."

She wasn't too happy, regardless of the victory. She didn't worry too much about Strickler, he was a sentimental fool who always got invested in his human life. Scaarbach was who she worried about, but that was for another day. They made their way to Trollmarket, Nomura's head pounding. She had a feeling her headache was going to get worse long before it got better.

#trollhunter nomura #trollhunters #fic