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e-vasong · 4 years

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I’ve already talked about a Leverage crossover where the Hargreeves are conmen but I'm. losing it thinking about. a Leverage AU where the Leverage team sees these kids on tv, and they just go. oh shit, that’s just fucking wrong. (I know the timelines don’t match up but let’s pretend the umbrella kids were born a little later, or that Leverage takes place a little earlier, or something like that. I don’t know.)

But these fucking umbrella kids show up on TV, and at first none of them are paying much attention. Not right away. They’re busy running cons, and none of them except Hardison watch TV for fun very often.

So they’ve all heard bits and pieces about this Umbrella thing, and aren’t quite sure what to make of it. Superhumans, huh? Eliot mutters at one point. Whatever. Our lives are already so goddamn weird.

But eventually they catch a broadcast while they’re home in between cases. it’s playing in the background while they’re enjoying a meal together at the brewery.

The Umbrella Academy saves the day yet again! the broadcaster declares cheerily. We go now to a statement at the Louvre from their leader, Sir Reginald Hargreeves.

It’s just novel enough to catch their attention--being who they are, they all perk up at the word Louvre--and it gets them half-watching as they chat over breakfast.

It’s Parker that sees it first. She’s Parker, so what catches her attention is actually not the fact that one of them is covered in blood, nor is it the fact that their father is calling them by numbers instead of names. It’s the way that they stand, tense and upright. It’s the way that the one covered in blood is trembling minutely, so fine that it’s almost imperceptible. But she notices. And she notices the way that the one to the bloodied boy’s left--the fifth one in line--leans over ever-so-subtly when their father is looking away. Whispers something with the barest movement of his lips. And then, after a moment of hesitation, he links hands with his shaking brother, twining their fingers together. Parker knows that whisper, knows what this is. She used to do that with her brother. Used to hold Nick’s hand, just like that, when their fosters were scaring him, trying to provide comfort even despite the fear of being caught.

It’s not long before the others follow her gaze. She’s stopped engaging in the conversation entirely, is just staring at the television with a death glare, nose wrinkled.

“Parker, baby,” Hardison says. “That’s your angry face.”

“I’m angry,” she says, and doesn’t elaborate.

“Got it,” Hardison takes it in stride, as he always does.

Eliot’s frowning at the TV. Unlike Parker, his eye does jump to the most obvious thing first. To the boy, no older than eleven or twelve probably, drenched head to toe with blood. There’s no rips in his clothing; Eliot’s pretty sure the blood isn’t his. He’s standing up straight, but his shoulders are slightly hunched. Like he’s injured. Broken ribs, maybe? And he’s been taught to hide them too. He’s also not the only one with that too-stiff posture. These kids aren’t standing up straight. They’re standing at attention. Number One, their father calls one of them, and what are those? Fucking callsigns?

Sophie and Nate are watching too. Their faces are carefully blank. They aren’t happy, Parker’s pretty sure, but they’re trying not to react.

“What the hell?” Hardison says slowly. He’s the last one to catch on, though only by a very narrow margin. He lacks Sophie and Nate’s cynicism, and the years of personal experience Parker and Eliot have, but he’s still too smart to not figure it out almost immediately. And he is first one to abandon the stunned stillness that’s fallen over the rest of them, pulling his laptop out of his bag, already quickly tapping away at the keys.

“This ain’t right,” Eliot says, voice a growl in his chest. “This is--this is--it’s televised child abuse.”

Sophie makes a quiet noise of agreement then. “It is,” she says, quietly disgusted. “Those poor children.”

Nate is still staring at the screen, lips pressed flat.

“This Reginald guy looks rich,” Parker says. Then: “Can we kill him?”

Eliot chokes on his drink.

“How is this even legal?” Sophie asks. She sounds curious, though not particularly surprised by the grievous violation of child protection laws before her. “It’s so...blatant.”

“Sir Reginald Hargreeves,” Hardison says, no longer typing. “He is--oh shit.” And the typing resumes, faster and a little more panicked than before.

“Hardison?” Nate prods after a moment, giving Hardison a sidelong glance.

“Yeah, yeah, it’s all good,” Hardison says. “The INTERPOL files on this guy are locked up tight though. Almost tripped their security system there. I didn’t, of course, but--”

“You couldn’t get in?” Eliot says, smirking.

“Yet,” Hardison says. “Dammit, man, it’s been less than five minutes. Give me a couple hours and that thing is mincemeat. Metaphorically speaking, of course. But I do see what’s going on here and,” he clicks his tongue, shaking his head in disappointment. “Y’all, this is hinky.”

“Yes, I think we got that,” Nate says. The corner of his lip twitches up.

“Yeah, yeah,” Hardison says. “This guy has got friends everywhere. No one knows how he got the kids, but it looks like he technically bought them--”

“He what?” Sophie sounds like she’s been suckerpunched. Parker can’t think of the last time she heard Sophie sound so shocked.

“Oh yeah. You think that’s bad? The numbers aren’t code names The numbers are their name names. Like, legally. I just found an article that said he ordered them by how useful he thinks they are, but judging by the adoption papers it was actually in the order he, uh,” Hardison coughs, “acquired them.”

Eliot is swaying where he stands. “Common tactic. He’s pitting them against one another so they’ll be easier to control. It undermines the self worth of the ones lower on the scale and makes the ones that are higher up feel obligated to do what he wants. Son of a bitch.”

“...And it looks like he leveraged their powers as excuse to gain exemptions from child protection laws,” Hardison continues like he hasn’t been interrupted. “Claimed their abilities meant they don’t need the same safeguards.”

“That’s bullshit!” Eliot sounds thunderous.

“I know, buddy,” Hardison reaches over blindly, waving his hand around vaguely until he finds Eliot’s shoulder. He gives it a comforting squeeze. “I didn’t write it.”

Eliot heaves in a shuddering breath. “That’s just--”

“Evil,” Sophie finishes.

“I’m inclined to agree,” Nate says. He’s not watching the TV anymore. He’s staring off into the middle distance, arms crossed over his chest.

“Oh!” Parker perks up. All the grief and distress that had been brewing on her face vanishes like storm clouds parting for the sun. “Nate! Nate, are you scheming? You look like you’re scheming.”

Nate makes a noncommittal grunt. “It would be dangerous.”

“They’re in danger,” Sophie says softly, jerking her head in the television’s direction.

Eliot’s long-since gotten to his feet. He’s pacing, and that’s how Parker knows he’s furious. When Eliot is too angry to stand it, he has to move, has to find some way to handle the rage roiling under his skin. Usually he cooks, chopping vegetables with furious aplomb. And when he can’t cook, he paces.

“They’re fucking child soldiers,” he says. “I can’t--” he cuts himself off with a furious shake of the head. I can’t believe, he was about to say, Parker thinks, but he had to stop because that’s not true. Eliot knows better than anyone what the government--what the world does to people they find useful, whether its skill or power that makes them so.

“Y’all are behind,” Hardison says in sing-song. “I’m already trying to burn this motherfucker down.”

“Hardison, do not tip our hand,” Nate says, snapping into his leader-voice automatically. Parker grins. He’s already got a plan, then. She knew all that reluctance was just for show. Sophie laughs, as clear and bright as the ringing of a bell, and even Eliot perks up.

Hardison grumbles, closing his laptop and stuffing it back in his messenger bag.

Nate is grinning a little too, though it’s that angry smile he gets sometimes when Parker knows he’s thinking about hurting bad people. She understands. She's wearing hers too right now. Nate glances them all over, and for all the malice dripping off the knife’s edge of that smile, his eyes are soft. Maybe even a little proud.

“Fine. Fine. You guys win,” Nate says, lifting his hands in defeat. He’s putting on a show of being beleaguered, but Parker can hear the sparking anger in his voice, and oh, how could she have forgotten? Sophie is so gently righteous, Hardison so achingly distressed, and Eliot so full of fire and fury that she almost didn’t notice Nate’s seething wrath, nearly forgot that Nate looks at every injured child in need of help and thinks of Sam. “Everyone, get your things. Hardison, get us some plane tickets. Let’s go steal some children.”

“Okay, okay. I ain’t complaining cause, like, fuck that guy,” Hardison says, slinging his bag over his shoulder. “But stealing children? Could you have made us sound anymore like kidnappers?”

“Hardison!”

“I’m just saying.”

#tua #the umbrella academy #leverage #my writing #this is kind of garbage but i cant stop thinking about it!!!

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the-bau-quinjet · 3 years

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Seven Drinks

Bucky x f!reader

Summary: There's a reason Y/N has never had more than 3 drinks around the other avengers, and they're about to find out.

Warnings: depression, thoughts of suicide, panic attacks, angst (don't worry there's fluff too)

Word Count: 4322

a/n: This is inspired by that episode of Brooklyn 99 with 6 drink Amy (I adopted that concept!) and also Halsey's album Manic. :) I hope you like it. Anything in bold is a lyric from one of the songs on the album!

Please let me know if I messed up the trigger warning tags! I've never written anything like this before, so I just want to make sure I do it right.

Masterlist

"We're having a party tonight." Tony's announcement was met with the usual groans of annoyance at having to schmooze with the typical socialites that attended Tony's party. "You know, you are so ungrateful sometimes. here I am trying to throw you a party, and you're complaining!"

"Tony, we all appreciate the effort you go to, but- at least speaking for me- I don't like people." Y/N's response was effortless, swiftly calming Tony and explaining the reactions.

"That is why-" Tony stuttered when he actually registered the words you said. "That doesn't sound like you at all. And besides, this is a party for just us. It'll be more like team building, but without any pre-planned activities. No "smarmy, rich people" to deal with." He directed his last sentence at Bucky, Steve, and Sam.

The team actually seemed excited at the prospect, albeit skeptical of Tony's motivations.

Unsurprisingly, Nat worked up the courage to question him on it first, "what's the catch?"

"No catch. Just friends, food, and lots of alcohol." His grin quickly shifted into a smirk as the entire room turned to look at you.

You groaned slightly, not wanting all the attention. "Look, there is a reason I cap myself at 3 drinks." Holding up one finger, you started to explain, "One drink Y/N is barely any different from my sober self."

Wanda quickly cut you off, "not true! You get louder." She smirked, happy to have added that tidbit of information.

"Fine." With a laugh, you admitted she was right. "I might get the tiniest bit louder." You held up a second finger to continue your explanation, but were once again cut off.

"It's not a bad thing. It's just your happy, bubbly, and slightly louder than normal personality shining through!" Nat added, seeing an opportunity to tease you for being so positive all the time.

"Thanks Nat. Anyway," emphasizing the rudeness of being interrupted twice, you continued, "two drink Y/N is more touchy feely than normal. Not in a creepy way though!"

"I love two drink Y/N. She gives the best hugs!" Thor eagerly added to the conversation, glad to have dropped by when he did.

"Thanks Thor." With a small smile in his direction, you held up a third finger. "Three drink Y/N is the perfect amount of just past tipsy to have fun without doing anything extremely embarrassing. It makes the most sense to stop there." You finished her little speech with your typical smile and a resolute nod of your head.

"Seriously, you need to relax. Just let loose this one time!" Sam tried to encourage you. With the eyes of nearly every avenger set on you, your resolve didn't last very long.

"Fine! Maybe I'll have a fourth drink." You were met with cheers as you rose from your spot on the couch, trying to prepare for the night that was to come.

As soon as you stepped off the elevator, you had a drink in your hand. Clearly your friends were going to make sure you got a fourth drink. even Steve seemed excited when he saw you, although his golden boy personality didn't disappear completely.

"You sure about this? I don't want you to feel pressured!" Bucky nodded, weirdly enthusiastically, before adding, "Yeah doll, don't drink more than you want to."

"You two are too sweet. Sam's right, but don't tell him I said that." You winked at the two super soldiers, emphasizing the joke. "I should let myself relax sometimes. I'm in a safe place, with friends who won't let anything happen to me. What could a few more drinks really do?" You couldn't help but smile at how true that was. You were surrounded by people who care about you.

"Oh, so now it's a few more drinks? What are we talking here, six drink Y/N? Seven?" Bucky teased.

"You'll have to wait and see, Ducky." You teased right back, knowing how flustered he got at the pet name. Steve laughed at his friend as you walked away, ready for your second drink.

Before long, you had your fourth drink in your hand. It was slightly odd how literally everyone was staring at you, but your were three drink Y/N at the time, so you were drunk enough not to care.

You downed the fourth drink, unprepared for the consequences.

"So, Y/N... how do you feel?" Clint braved the waters, everyone eagerly awaiting your reaction.

"That is so nice of you to ask! I feel great! I don't think I've ever been this happy." You jumped up and down, hugging Clint with a huge smile on your face.

"How did you get even happier?" Tony chuckled, shaking his head slightly.

"Do you not like it?" Like a switch had been flipped, you were nearly crying.

"What?! No!" Tony was so taken aback at the tears pooling in your eyes, he froze, unsure how to fix it. He looked around the room for help, but everyone else was just as shocked as him.

"I'll fix it!" You were at the bar, fixing another drink before anyone fully comprehended your mood swing.

You walked back up to the group, sipping from your fifth drink as if nothing happened. "What?" You questioned the odd looks, but before receiving an answer you squealed, again jumping up and down. "Let's dance!" You turned around, ready to move to the more open area before looking back over your shoulder, "Wanda! Nat! Pepper! Come on!"

The women shared a look, ultimately shrugging before joining you on the makeshift dance floor.

"Bucky, you've been staring at her for 20 straight minutes. When are you finally gonna talk to her?" Steve couldn't help but pester him about his feelings.

"I can't help it. I've never seen her dance so much. I mean, I know she's always happy, but this is a whole new level." He didn't take his eyes off of you, even when he was responding. "I can't tell her tonight, though. This is the most she's had to drink in years."

He watched as you moved back over to the bar, needing another drink after dancing so much.

"Here we go, six drink Y/N." Bucky gestured to the bar. Steve shook his head, but allowed the change of topic.

About five minutes after your sixth drink, you were somehow bounding around with even more energy. You were nearly running around the room, trying to talk to everyone at once.

"Ducky! Have I ever told you I took gymnastics lessons for 7 years when I was younger?" You were bouncing with pent up energy, excited to be sharing more information about yourself.

"No, you've actually never mentioned that." He smiled, enraptured by your childlike enthusiasm, so enraptured that he didn't notice the mischief in your eyes.

"Well, I did! Watch this." You handed a confused Bucky your now empty glass, turning and throwing your arms up. Bucky realized two late what was happening, and with both yours and his glasses in his hands, he couldn't physically stop you.

"Y/N, wait!" His shout had everyone turn and look as you flawlessly executed two cartwheels in a row.

Bucky would swear your smile got even bigger as you turned around to look at him again.

"Normally I can do more, but" you hiccuped, then lowered your voice to a really terrible whisper, "I'm a little drunk." You leaned into him, laughing as if you just told a joke.

Wanda walked up to you with a seventh drink, hoping seven drink Y/N had a little less energy, but happy to see you having so much fun. "Here ya go! One more of your favorites, just like you asked."

"Thank youuuuuu!" You shifted to hug Wanda, leaving Bucky to miss your added warmth.

You sipped your seventh drink slower than the rest, quickly running out of energy. Sliding the empty glass across the bar, you slipped out of the party unnoticed, making your way to the kitchen for some pickles- your favorite drunk food.

Your seventh drink hit you just after you opened the pickles. Gone was the happy, bubbly persona you showed the world. The mask slipped away, leaving you alone to contemplate your life choices.

You made your way to to the lounge just outside of the kitchen, choosing to lay on the floor behind the couch and stare out of the large floor to ceiling windows.

"Where's Y/N?" Bucky glanced around the room, an uneasy feeling in his stomach.

"Huh? Oh, she said she wanted a snack." A very drunk Wanda turned to look at where the food was set up, scrunching her face in confusion when she couldn't find you. "Weird. Maybe she went to the bathroom?"

Bucky, having noticed your absence 8 minutes ago, didn't think you left for a bathroom break. "Maybe." Plus, you always took the girls to the bathroom with you. His eyes flitted about the room, taking one more glance before deciding to go look for you.

He decided to head for the kitchen since Wanda said you wanted a snack. He laughed at the open jar of pickles, knowing you at least passed through this room. He put the pickles away before popping his head into the lounge area.

"Y/N?" He called out, figuring this was the most likely location for you to end up.

You hummed in response, not moving from your spot on the floor. Bucky walked further into the room, slightly confused as to why he could hear you but not see you. That is, until he realized you were laying on the floor behind the couch.

"Why are you on the floor?" He smiled when he found you.

"I'm just looking at the sky." Your voice held a melancholy air as it floated through the room. Bucky's smile faltered, not used to hearing you sad. In the three years he's known you, he's only ever seen you sad because of a movie or tv show. Otherwise, you were quite literally always happy.

"Why-" he faltered, unsure how to check on you. "Is everything okay?" he nearly choked the words out, feeling slightly stressed at your sudden gloominess.

"Yeah." You took a deep breath, slowly letting it out in a deep sigh. "Yeah, I'm fine. It's just... I don't know." You sigh again, still looking at the sky.

Bucky chances another question, wanting to get you talking since you're acting so off. "How are you feeling?"

"I feel... so sorry." You words were so soft that Bucky could barely hear them.

"Sorry?" He tried to hide his confusion, matching your soft tone as he sat down a few feet away from you. "About what doll?"

"Just... because I feel so sad." Tears pooled in your eyes, but you didn't stop staring at the sky.

"What are you sad about?" It's taking everything in him for Bucky not to hold you right now. He doesn't want to make you even more upset, especially because he's never seen you like this.

"No one around me knows who I am..." He watched as a tear rolled down your cheek, shining in the light from the moon.

Bucky moves closer, just close enough for him to reach out and hold your hand. You squeeze it, instant relief flooding through him that he hasn't crossed any boundaries.

He goes to speak, but you cut him off. "I'm not breaking. I won't take it. And I won't ever feel this way again." Your voice is harder, as if your angry with yourself.

"Hey, hey, hey. It's okay to have feelings. You're allowed to feel like this. Don't push it away. Talk to me. Why don't you think anyone knows who you are? We're all here for you, Y/N." He rubs his thumb over the back of your hand, trying to convey how serious he is.

You let out a dry laugh, wiping the the tears from your cheek. "My self preservation..." Bucky can tell there's more to, choosing to wait for you to continue. "All of my reservations..." You sigh again, sitting up, you scoot closer until you can lean your forehead against his shoulder. "I bottle it up. I'm my own biggest enemy." You let out another dry laugh, shaking your head without moving it from its resting place on Bucky's shoulder.

Bucky wraps his arm around you and leans his cheek against your head. "Take your time. You can talk to me." He whispered, trying to keep you talking without getting mad at yourself again.

"Well, I'd like to tell you that my sky is not blue, it's violent rain." The sounds of your sniffles break his heart. "I just pretend everything's fine because that's what I had to do when I was younger." Rather then interrupting, Bucky continues to rub small circles on your hand and your back, encouraging you to continue when you're ready. "Can I tell you a story? I... I think it'll help explain some of it."

"Of course. Anything you need, doll." He curses himself for the pet name, not wanting you to think he's joking. He just can't help it when it comes to you.

"Thank you, ducky." You chuckle, but your words are just as sincere as his. "You know I have two sisters, and I love them with all my heart, but sometimes growing up with them was hard. My older sister, she put so much pressure on herself to succeed. And, she did. She was so good at everything she did, that I felt like I had to be just as perfect.

With my younger sister, it was like it was effortless. She put just as much, if not more pressure on herself. but, she could do anything she tried to, with almost no learning curve. I always felt this crazy amount of pressure to be just as good.

My parents, they didn't really help with that. I mean, they were so supportive and I'm so grateful to them, but it was a lot of pressure. The summer between my junior and senior year of college, I wanted to get an internship. Ya know, to get some experience. It would set me up better for getting a job after graduation.

I spent months looking and applying, but nothing was working out. So, I went home for the summer. My mom would come home everyday and ask me if I got a job yet.

I spent nearly every waking hour looking for a job, even just a part time one for the summer. So one day, when we sat down for dinner and she asked if I got a job yet..."

Bucky could feel how tense you were telling this story, but he knew you needed to get it out.

"I told her, 'no, not yet' and she just seemed so disappointed. She asked if I was even applying and I snapped.

I yelled at her, something that had never really happened before. I told her I was trying. I was doing everything I could. She yelled at me for yelling and said it wasn't unreasonable to ask for updates.

I yelled right back. I kept saying I spend all day everyday trying and just when I finally get a break, she walks in and brings it all up again. I was stressed enough without her constant reminders.

I ended up running away from the table, in tears. I hid in the bathroom, there... there was a pair of scissors on the counter and I really thought about killing myself that day."

The tears are pouring out of you at this point. Bucky threw caution to the wind. He picked you up, maneuvering you to sit across his lap and lean your head on his chest. He kept rubbing circles into your back, murmuring words of encouragement.

"My younger sister tried to check on me, but I wouldn't open the door. My mom stomped down the hallway to her bedroom. I was full on having a panic attack in the hallway bathroom. I think I stayed in there for an hour before I went back to the dinner table.

My dad was in the kitchen. He put my plate in the microwave to heat up dinner for me. I ate through near constant tears, it only got worse every time he tried to ask me what happened. Why I snapped like that.

I wanted to apologize to my mom for yelling, so after I ate I went to her room. I knocked, and when she told me to come in I opened the door. I just remember her looking so angry.

I apologized. I told her I was sorry for yelling. She said something about not being unreasonable again. I cried again. When she asked what was wrong, I told her I was scared.

I couldn't put it into words though, so when she asked me 'of what?' I just shrugged. Then, she asked me if I was on my period.

God. I wanted to scream. I wanted to yell at her again, To make her understand 'I only wanna die some days. But if I decide to break, who will fill the empty space?' I decided that day that I would never try to tell anyone how I actually felt."

Bucky holds you as you cry. You're not sure how long it's been when you can finally breathe enough to talk again.

"I just, so many people have bigger problems then me. I grew up in a loving household. I went to college and made friends. I got a job after I graduated. So why am I so sad sometimes? I just wanna scream but what’s the use? At night, I lay awake and I stare at the door, I just can’t take it no more."

Bucky continues comforting you when he speaks again. "Just because other people have problems, doesn't mean yours are irrelevant. You are 100% allowed to feel however you feel, even if it seems like there's no reason for it. Have you ever thought about talking to someone about all of this? I know you just said you haven't told anyone how you actually feel for years, but I think it could help." He smiled nervously when you raised your head to look at him.

"I have actually. I joked about it a lot with my roommate right out of college. I always used to say 'everybody needs therapy' as a joke. Of course, I meant it. Most people probably do need therapy." You laughed, moving your arms around Bucky's neck to hug him. "Thank you for listening to me. I like talking to you."

Of course, Bucky noticed your smile didn't reach your eyes. He was confident in his words when he spoke again. "You can always talk to me. I'll always be there to listen." He followed that with a less confident "What's been bothering you today?"

"Oh, nothing that serious. It's just all pent up inside, ya know?" You smiled again, hiding your face so he couldn't see your lies.

Of course, he could still hear it in your voice. "Y/N, you can tell me. I want to be here for you."

"I... It's just, my insecurities are hurting me." You laughed at yourself. "Here we go with the fucking riddles, again. On the plus side, I think I've cried so much I'm back to one drink Y/N."

"Well, it has been 3 hours since I left to come find you." You were grateful for Bucky's joke, needing something to lift the mood a bit. "But, don't try and change the subject. I still want to know what's got you all sad." His words were light, but you knew how serious he was.

You took a deep breath, burying your head in his neck. "How could somebody ever love me?" You spoke into his shirt, not moving your head back even an inch.

"You know I can't understand you when you talk into my neck like that." Bucky tried joking, but even he knew it would do little to calm your fears.

You moved back, lips still grazing his skin when you repeated yourself, "how could somebody ever love me?"

Bucky wanted to scream. He wanted to tell you how much he loves you. He would gladly spend every day of his life loving you, but he didn't think this was the right time. Not when you just poured your heart out to him. So he settled for the almost truth.

"Anyone would be lucky to love you. You are selfless. You put everyone else first, no matter what. You always make sure everyone has a reason to smile, even when things aren't going right. You tell the best jokes. You're great at cuddling." He squeezes you closer to him, emphasizing the point. "You are beautiful, inside and out. Everyone who comes into contact with you automatically has a better day. You are incredibly strong and independent. I've never met anyone so incredibly good. Even Steve. Anyone would be lucky to be loved by you."

His words brought more tears to your eyes, pooling in the corners. "Then how come everyone that I’ve dated says they hate it cause they don’t know what to do with me? I feel broken."

"They were all idiots. You're not broken. Not even a little bit. You're learning how to express your feelings. You just need someone who would take it slow." He pressed a kiss to your forehead, struggling not to tell you everything.

"I wonder if you’d take it slow." Your eyes go wide when that slips out. You hadn't meant to make things uncomfortable. One look at Bucky's face has you freaking out. He looks stunned. "I'm so sorry! I didn't mean to say that. It just slipped out! Oh god, you've been there for me all night and I go and fuck it up by admitting I'm in love with you."

Your eyes grow even larger. You would move out of his lap, but his arms are still holding you in place. "Shit! Maybe I'm still drunk because apparently I have no filter." You say the last part more to yourself, but he can still hear you.

"Y/N?" Your name comes out of his mouth in a soft whisper.

"Yes?" You cringe internally at messing everything up.

"I would take it slow." He smiles, leaning his forehead against yours while he waits for you to absorb his words.

"Yeah?" You whisper back, a smile ghosting your lips.

"Yeah." You both lean in, exchanging soft, slow kisses and sleepy smiles.

The two of you ended up falling asleep leaning against the back of the couch. The sun streaming through the windows, combined with the noise of the other avengers in the kitchen, wakes you up.

You nudge Bucky, grinning when he pulls you closer.

"C'mon. Let's get some breakfast." He groans again, but eventually stands up.

The two of you walk into the nearly full kitchen, surprising everyone by coming from the lounge rather than the elevators. They share amused expressions, unaware of the emotional hurdles you jumped last night.

You head right for Sam, hugging him tightly before moving on to hug everyone else.

"I just wanted to thank you all. For encouraging me to live a little last night, but also for being there for me." Tears spring to your eyes again, shocking everyone but Bucky. "You're all like a family to me and I'm so glad I have you all to lean on." You made your way back to Bucky, leaning into his side while he poured both of you some cereal.

You smile when you look at him, kissing his cheek before sliding into the stool next to his.

As if broken out of a day dream, Sam sputters out a question. "What the hell did seven drink Y/N do last night?" Thrown off both by your behaviour with Bucky and the short emotional speech.

"Oh, seven drink Y/N is an emotional little bitch. I think I cried eight years of suppressed tears." You laughed, grinning at Bucky when he squeezed your hand. "Also, I think I need a therapist." Your casual admission has Tony spitting out his breakfast.

"What the hell happened last night after you disappeared from the party?" He guffaws, trying to put the pieces together.

"Also, why aren't you even a little bit hungover?" Nat chimed in, upset at missing out on seeing you anything but cheery.

"Well, to answer Nat first, I don't get hungover. Never have, even the one time I blackout out." You shrugged at everyone's slightly jealous expressions. "To answer Tony, I had an emotional breakthrough. Bucky helped me talk through it, something I never thought I'd be able to do. Long story short, i'm going to learn how to share my feelings instead of suppressing them all."

"Suppressing them? What are you talking about? I've literally never felt anything but happiness from you before?" Wanda questioned the new development.

"Well, that's because I'm really good at hiding how I feel. I'd rather not go through it all again, so just watch the security footage from the lounge last night, yeah? I want you all to know, even if it took seven drink Y/N to share it." You quickly finished eating, pulling Bucky to the doorway.

"While you do that, we're going out. Bye!" Before they could question anything else, you ran to the elevator, dragging a very willing Bucky behind you.

"We're going out?" He questioned when the elevator doors shut.

"Yep. Get dressed, I want to see all your favorite places in New York. Even if they're different now. Take me to all your favorite spots." You both smiled, sharing another soft kiss before parting to change for the day.

"Hey," Bucky called, causing you to turn over your shoulder, "I love you."

"I love you too."

#bucky x reader #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fanfiction #marvel fanfiction #bucky barnes angst #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes one shot #tw: suicide #tw: depression #tw: panic attack

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lucifer-is-a-bag-of-dicks · 3 years

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what happened the first time Wes tried to crack open the Danny is Phantom conspiracy did he like, confront Danny first or was it all behind his back like, maybe hoping ground zero would be lost among the gossip and that Danny wouldn't find out who spilled the beans once everyone knew

I mean it obviously wouldn't work because nobody believed him and the gossip didn't take off very far beyond a few people talking about Wes being kinda weird

I should absolutely write a fic about this.

I am absolutely going to write a fic about this.

I AM RIGHT NOW GOING TO WRITE A FIC ABOUT THIS.

----

"Hey Fenton! Fenton!!" Dash came bounding over and threw a meaty arm around his shoulder.

"Jesus Dash! What?!" Danny buckled under the weight (pretended to anyway) as Dash gave him a surprisingly lighthearted punch on the arm.

"You haven't heard?! Wes has this total batshit insane theory, it's hilarious!"

Dash was in a genuine giggle-fit, Danny didn't think he'd ever seen him this merry, he was also starting to suspect he was going to leave this conversation being the butt of the joke somehow. Wait-

"Wes? Who the heck is Wes?" Danny asked, it wasn't like he knew everyone in school, like Dash seemed to.

"He's on the basketball team, you know, tall guy, red hair, threw a sick move at least month's game! You know, WES!"

"I didn't watch that game."

"Oh," said Dash, flatly, "Oh yeah, almost forgot you're a total nerd. Anyway, like I was saying!"

Dash grabbed Danny by the shoulders and nearly lifted him off the floor.

"Wes thinks," he could barely speak through his giggling, he even snorted a few times, "Wes thinks your secretly PHANTOM."

Dash dropped Danny back down as he doubled over laughing.

"Could you imagine?! You! You're not even DEAD!" Dash honest to god slapped his knee in mirth.

Danny went through an incredibly swift array of emotions in the span of about five seconds.

The first was fear, clear and bracing, then came confusion, how did he know? Had he seen something? Then there was hope, Dash didn't believe it, and if DASH didn't believe it, maybe nobody else believed it either. Then relief, he could roll with this, he could TOTALLY roll with this! Dash was right! It was absurd, it was ridiculous, it was hilarious, him being Phantom? What utter nonsense!

Sam and Tucker had been standing by his side at a Dash-safe distance, looking absolutely horrified. Sam looked ready to jump in and lay down a swift defence, but Danny gave a quick little low wave for her to stand down. He got this.

"Oh my god SERIOUSLY?" Danny busted out a slightly hysterical laugh, okay so he wasn't completely over the initial terrified anxiety.

"How could I- I mean what- WHY does he think I'M Phantom?! I mean how does that even work I don't-"

Dash clapped him on the shoulder, this was probably the most contact he'd ever had with him without being physically assaulted.

"I know right?! Like apparently he thinks you look alike? And he's all like 'But I've seen his eyes glow green' and 'they're never in the same roo-hoo-hoom." Dash wheezed and started hacking and coughing.

Danny carefully constructed a look of offence.

"Hey I mean, it's not THAT funny. Why couldn't I be Phantom! I know how to use a Fenton Thermos! Look I even HAVE one right-" he torn open his backpack and pulled one out, making sure to fumble it in a terrific display of fuck-uppery and drop it noisily on the cafeteria floor, he dropped to his knees trying to grab it but knocked it under a table.

A few girls standing nearby who'd been listening in started tittering, one of the guys sitting at the table snorted milk through his nose and Dash was just about on the floor in hysterics.

Even Sam and Tucker covered their mouths in an attempt to look like they were holding in laughter. Tucker muttered to Sam, just loud enough for people around to hear.

"I mean, he's our friend and we love him, but god that was painful to watch. He knows he's terrible at ghost hunting! He's got like, nothing but thumbs."

Danny climbed under the table, grabbed at the thermos and lifted it up as he crawled back out.

"See! See! I have a thermos! I could TOTALLY be Phantom!"

Sam walked over and placed a gentle hand on his shoulder. "It's okay bud, I think you'd be a great Phantom." her voice was thick with her usual sarcasm, soaked in pity though it were.

Danny's ears burned in embarrassment, he might have been humiliating himself on purpose, but it was still humiliating, watching everyone laugh at him for being so weak and incompetent. He was grateful to his friends for pushing through their discomfort and keeping up the act, it was still painful, but it came with a wash of pure unadulterated relief.

Nobody believed this Wes guy, nobody thought it could be even remotely possible. People would talk about it for a little while, have a laugh, maybe there would be a few memes and in-jokes, but eventually it would drop off. People would forget all about it and it would be just another notch on the gossip mill belt.

Even if someone DID believe it, they could never admit it for fear of vicious ridicule, for once in his life peer pressure was his friend.

And then Wes walked in.

Once Danny saw him he realised that he did recognise Wes, he'd seen him hanging around Kwan a few times, and chatting with Star, he was also in Danny's english class. That was about as familiar as he got with the guy, they'd never spoken a word to each other.

Wes had a terrifying expression of seething fury ripping across his face. He was glaring at Dash.

"It's NOT. FUNNY."

Dash was completely unable to stand, it was honestly overkill, Danny almost thought he was hamming it up on purpose, but maybe not, his face was turning an alarming shade of red after all.

"Wes don-" Dash gasped. "Don't do this to me man, I can't brea-" Dash was gasping for air, trying desperately to hold down the giggles.

Danny could almost see steam rising as Wes seethed. Then suddenly that furious stare was shooting daggers straight at him. Danny shrank into himself, looking as small and helpless as he possibly could.

"Uh hey Wes, um, I've heard the news." he joked tacking on a nervous laugh for emphasis. "Uh, soooo," he tossed the thermos from hand to hand, nearly dropping it again. "Is this like, just a joke or do you really-?"

Dash continued to wheeze, Kwan was holding him up by the arm, muttering about getting some water to cool off.

Wes strode over until he and Danny were face to face, he was taller by a good couple inches, even more so with Danny making a conscious effort to appear small.

Wes jabbed a sharp finger into his collarbone.

"Don't think I'm fooled by this pathetic act you've got going on, I am ONTO you, Phantom." he spat.

Danny glanced sidelong at the table beside him, silently begging for assistance, they only watched in silence, strained faces trying not to laugh. A glance the other way to his friends, they simply shrugged.

"Um, okaaay," Danny started backing away slowly. "Uh look Wes I am honestly really flattered but, do we really look that alike?" Danny ran a hand through his hair and then pointed up at Wes. "I mean we BOTH kinda have Phantom's haircut."

Sam deadpanned from the sidelines, "Maybe they're BOTH Phantom."

"We should start marketing that haircut." Tucker muttered to himself, tapping something on his tablet. "We could make a fortune, are you any good at hairdressing?"

Sam shot him a look of disgust and did not dignify the question with a response.

"Don't play dumb you two," said Wes, flipping his focus, "You're definitely in on this!"

The entire cafeteria was awash with giggles by this point. Just about everyone had heard about Wes' theory, but were mostly convinced it was some kinda joke. Now? Now they knew Wes was straight up fucking delusional.

He glanced around as people laughed, at him. At HIM.

"It's not funny!" he yelled over the crowed, the tittering increased in volume. Someone across the room yelled-

"Hey if I get the haircut, can I be Phantom too?"

One of the goths stood up on her seat.

"I've GOT the haircut! Mom says it's MY TURN to be the Phantom!"

There was a fresh round of mirthful laughter, some kids wheezing as hard as Dash had been. Another few kids piped up above the cacophony, throwing jokes of their own.

"I've got a soup thermos so I'm Phantom now, sorry sweaty I don't make the rules."

"If I wear a Phantom shirt does that make me Phantom ALL the time or am I only Phantom when I'm wearing it?"

"I have an ass, Phantom has an ass. Conclusion: I am Phantom's ass."

"Tag yourself I'm the thermos."

"DO THE BUTTS MATCH?"

Wes had been trying to scream over the din, infuriated, desperate to find SOMEONE who would listen.

Danny gave him a pat on the back.

"Hey, if it makes you feel any better, The Guys in White once hunted some guy down because he had white hair, if a government agency can fuck that up then-"

Wes slugged him.

It wasn't a particularly solid punch like Dash's hits, it was quick and precise, Was wasn't a brawny guy, but he was lean and fast and had good aim.

Danny whuffed out a heavy breath as Wes' fist collided with his sternum and he collapsed to the floor.

Everyone in the cafeteria lost their shit, a few people screamed and one table of football jocks all stood up chanting, "FIGHT. FIGHT. FIGHT. FIGHT."

Tucker ran over to him as Sam stepped up and without hesitation slammed a fist straight into Wes' nose.

The footballers lost their minds, one of the goths stood up on their table screaming "REPRESEEENT!!"

Wes backed up immediately, crying out from the sharp pain blossoming across his face, he'd never been hit before and couldn't pull his thoughts together quick enough to throw a punch back at her, so he was taken by surprise once again as Sam placed a solid roundhouse kick to his stomach.

He had certainly not been expecting that kind of brute strength from her, she had incapacitated him swiftly and effectively, barely having broken a sweat.

One of his teammates hollered over the crowd and came barrelling down on the goth, she dodged without batting an eye and darted nimbly out of the way, giving the guy a quick kick in the pants to throw him off balance as she rocketed for the cafeteria door.

As Wes took a deep breath through his mouth, his nose dripping blood, he realised that Danny and Tucker were gone. The fight had lasted only seconds but Sam had run distraction well enough for the boys to take off without anyone noticing, a glance around showed Tucker supporting Danny about to exit through the cafeteria doors.

The doors opened to an out of breath Mr Lancer on the other side.

"'The Light Fantastic!' WHAT is going on here?!"

Oh they were all so fucked.

#danny phantom #wes weston #I definitely wanna write a sequel in detention #danny phantom fanfiction #Lula's headcanons #Lula's fanfics

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ray-ray-writings · 3 years

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Hybrid!Reader Galore-SBI (and one Awesamdude)

So I am combining four different requests with this one post because I have recently discovered that I am allowed to do that hahaha. So instead of five separate posts, it’s one big post!! I hope you enjoy!!! (There is a bonus idea at the bottom, it is not SBI, rather a Sam idea and it is so amazing and is not mine, the idea comes from our very own Sunflower anon who has my whole heart.)

Elytran

Well first things first, you guessed it. You have wings. You have beautiful wings that allow you to fly for miles and miles without getting tired. They are big and cover most of your back. When they’re not in use, they’re tucked in tightly to your back for save keeping.

You and Philza are obviously very close. You and he can relate on so many levels. You spend a lot of time bonding over your wings. You know you can always go to him when you have questions about your wings and he is always willing to give you his knowledge, tips, and tricks on how to properly take care of your wings and stuff like that. I like to imagine that the two of you definitely help each other preen your wings. He more so you though. Like if it has been too long in his opinion he will force you to sit down on a chair so that you’re straddling it and your stomach is pressed against the back of the chair and he very carefully pulls the loose feathers and gets all of the grass and leaves and stuff out of your wings. Every so often you will return the favor, but because he’s been around so long he is practically perfect at doing his own wings himself and so he usually just focuses on you because you’re his kid and he wants to make sure that you’re taken care of. He gets a lot of the preening done when you two are sitting on the couch together and you’re snuggled up to his chest and his hand is just softly trailing up and down your wings. Smoothing out your feathers and carefully pulling out the ones that need to come out. It feels very nice and is very comforting.

I also feel though that your brothers would also do this to you sometimes. Just when you’re having a conversation with one of them they will grab your shoulders and turn you around and you would be forced to talk to them as they pick at your wings. Sometimes Tommy is too rough and so he can only do it when he’s absolutely calm. I 100% believe that before his death, Wilbur was the best brother to go to for help with your wings when Phil wasn’t around. He has the hands of musician, steady and gentle hands but still calloused and rough from years of plucking at a guitar. So he would be really good at being careful but also would be very good at picking out the things that needed to go while also being good at, i guess, petting your wings. I feel like Techno would be okay at it, not as good as Phil and Wilbur though. I feel like Tommy could be too rough sometimes. I feel like there are two different Techno’s you could get. A soft and gentle Techno who is very careful when messing with your wings or a rough and quick Techno that just really wants to be done with whatever you’ve asked him to do. So you would have to catch Techno on a good day in order for him to be able to properly help you.

Like Philza and Techno do, You and Philza go on adventures together all the time, only there is a slight difference obviously. You two go on flights. You two fly for hours at a time sometimes, not always have a particular destination in mind. You two just like to fly together. It’s such a freeing feeling. You two just fly together, feel the wind in your hair and your wings. The time is usually spent just chatting about anything and everything. It’s nice. You just get to spend a lot of time with your dad and you get to feel free and get to get away from all of the drama of the smp. I like to imagine that sometimes you two fly for so long that you get too tired to keep flying, but you have to get home. So Phil will pick you up, you wrap your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist, and he will fly the two of you home. He’s been alive for hundred of years and has had years of flying practice and so he almost never gets tired from flying and so he has absolutely no problem carrying you home if you’re too tired. Once you get a bit older and stuff, I also like to think that you’re able to do the same for your brothers, obviously not as long as Philza can, but you can pick them up and take them on a little flight around the server. Tommy would love it the most. He would cling to you, terrified you would drop him, but he would love being so high up, seeing everything and feeling free. He would love that he actually got to feel like a kid again. Wilbur and Techno would like it a lot less than Tommy. They would take you up on the offer every once in a while, but I don’t think they would like it that much. Like Techno would like to feel the wind through his hair and to feel free and not have to worry about anything, but I feel like he would just be hella scared that you’re going to drop him. He’s a big man and he trusts you a lot, but that doesn’t mean you’re strong enough to hold him. Don’t tell anyone, but I kind of headcanon that Wilbur is scared of heights. I don’t know why, I just kind of get that vibe from him. So like on the very very very rare occasion where you take him for a fly, he spends the whole time clinging to you for dear life with his face buried in your neck and his eyes clenched tightly closed. You can’t help but laugh at him though. You asked him about it once, why he accepts your offer if he’s so terrified, his answer warmed your heart. “I just like spending time with you. Anyway that I can.” (Complete side note, Ghostbur on the other hand would love love love love to go on flights with you. Like would beg you almost every day to go on one.)

Ghast hybrid

Listen, I am not saying this to exclude anyone okay? Please don’t take it as that, but you would be pale. You would be so pale. It’s the ghast in you and so you would be so pale. Like I feel you would almost have to wear a hat or put on sunscreen every time you left the house in the overworld because you would so easily be burned. That being said, you definitely would thrive in the nether. Like the heat and the brightness of the lava wouldn’t bother you at all as you travel through your home biome. You would also be able to fly. You would move so smoothly through the sky. You wouldn’t have wings or anything like that, you would just be able to fly. But like it would be so funny to scare the hell out of Tommy. Like you two are arguing or something or he’s just being annoying and so you just start fucking levatating as you stare him down. He would 100% shriek and run away from you causing you to laugh.

You always accompany any of the boys when they go into the nether for anything because no hostile mobs will attack if you’re nearby. Ghasts won’t shoot at you, hoglins won’t charge, blaze won’t fireball… you get it. Like the nether is your home and you are one of them, and they know that. You also are super good at navigating the nether. Think Human GPS but like half ghast GPS instead haha. You have absolutely saved the boys’ asses on more than one occasion. Like one time Techno wasn’t paying attention and he was just kind of walking around in the nether freely without thinking about it. He was going on and on about how it was nice to have you here but he probably could have handled it himself. He was right in the middle of telling you about how he probably could navigate the nether better than you when he literally walked straight off a cliff that hung right over a giant lava lake. You didn’t have time to laugh at his obliviousness. You knew that he couldn’t swim in lava, he may be a piglin hybrid that can survive the heat, but he absolutely could not swim in lava. So you very quickly ran right off of the edge of the cliff, flew down to him and just before he could sink into the lava, you grabbed him and flew him back up to the edge of the cliff. Once he was secure with solid ground under his feet, Techno would pull you into a giant hug. “Thank you,” he murmurs in your hair. You can’t help but giggle as you hug him back. “Of course. What was I going to do? Let you die? Besides, now we have prove of who’s the better nether navigator.” And Techno goes to argue but you just stare at him with a raised eyebrow and so his mouth snaps shut. You both knew you won that.

So Ghast tears right? So when you get upset to the point of crying, you do your best to keep in the tears because when you cry, they literally leave tear stains. Like your cheeks are stained and scarred for the next few hours because of the tears. It burns and is a painful thing, so you try to avoid it as much as possible. Another thing that happens when you’re upset is you begin to breathe fire and shoot fireballs out of your mouth. You accidentally discovered this once when Techno wouldn’t give you back your axe and you accidentally fireballed him into a wall, exploding parts of the wall as well. So when you get angry/upset, you clamp your mouth closed and don’t speak. That is the telltale sign that you’re angry, when you go silent. Tommy loves to push you at this point. Saying anything he can to get you to… well explode. It’s only worked once. Let’s just say that Tommy’s clothes and hair got a bit singed and he didn’t mess with you while you were upset for a few months afterwards.

Something useful about your tears is they can make regeneration potions. Obviously they aren’t full effect because you are only half ghast, but they still work. So even if you are crying and you are upset, you’re always sure to physically bottle up some of your tears when you do cry so that someone, mostly you or Techno, could make regeneration potions with them.

Raccoon hybrid

TRASH PANDAS!!!! Okay, right, sorry.

So we will begin with looks. You have little raccoons on top of your head, dark circles around your eyes, and a fuzzy black and white ringed tail. You have to take very good care of your ears and of your tail, making sure that it doesn’t get matted and stuff. I also feel you’re rather short. And sometimes you feel out of place among the absolute giants that are your brothers.

I feel like you would get along the best with Tommy. THIS IS NOT AN INSULT AT ALL but like for some reason I get a raccoon type vibe from Tommy. So I feel like you two would just vibe very well together. You’re mostly nocturnal due to your raccoon hybrid and Tommy is a 16 year old hyper boy who doesn’t like authority that much. So like he very often can be found in your room late at night. The two of you laughing and just hanging out together. If you get him on a good night, he will carefully pet your tail or brush it while you talk. You two have bonded a lot and shared a lot of sweet moments through your nocturnal nights together.

That being said, it does not stop Tommy from making fun of you. Raccoons are thought to be colorblind and Tommy knows this applies to you and does not stop making fun of you for it. “Hey Y/N! What color is this flower?” “Fuck off.” Because Tommy makes fun of you, you like to prank him a lot. Raccoons are actually very clever and this absolutely applies to you. You can move very quietly if you want so you manage to always prank Tommy really well…. That being said, you also find yourself very often ruining your own pranks because of how loud you can be. Have you ever heard a raccoon rummaging through your garbage at night? It feels like the loudest thing in the world lol. So sometimes you are accidentally careless and are very loud.

Raccoons can fall from pretty high heights without getting hurt, so you would be able to do the same. It would have been a total accident of how you found out though. You would have been helping Tommy build a random cobblestone tower when he accidentally pushed you off the tower. You didn’t have a water bucket and there was no water below you, so you literally prepared yourself for the loss of your first canon life. Your body finally hit the ground and you were left a little breathless from the force of the hit, but nothing hurt. You checked your wrist and found you had only lost one heart. Even though you were completely fine, Philza still gave Tommy hell for pushing you off the tower and grounded him for a few weeks. Even though you know you’d be fine from a big fall, you are still very careful when you’re high up. Like I said, you know you’ll be fine, but you don’t want to push the boundaries.

I feel like you have definitely been caught rummaging through the trash before. You were probably just bored and looking for something to do, or just something to play with and so on instinct, you reached into the trash and began searching through it. Philza would be the one to catch you. He wouldn’t even react too. He would simply let out a sigh, walk over to you, grab your arms and pull them out of the trash and walk you over to the sink before making you wash your hands. While you were doing that, he would take out the trash, making a mental note to get a more efficient/better way of getting rid of your trash.

Cow Hybrid

Yes yes yes yes. Okay okay. I love cows. Okay.

Starting out as always, appearance. So I think that you would have a few brown and white spots littering your skin. You’re entirely covered in them, but there are some on your arms, torso, and legs. You also have little horns that poke out of your hair. They’re a bit sensitive and your hair gets caught on them a lot, but they’re hella cute. You’re ears are where a human’s ears are, but they’re a bit bigger and a little more pink and flimsy than normal human ears. You also have a thin tail that pokes out behind you. You use it to swat things, mostly Tommy, away from you. When someone gets hit by your tail, it stings quite a bit. Your skin is rather tough, not like super tough, but like it has a rather leathery feel. So not only does it hurt when you hit people, but it can also be a bit harder for you to get hurt/cut and stuff. Which is rather nice.

Something just random but hella cute that I like to think happens is that if you’re out walking, with or without your family, baby cows will begin to follow you. If they get far enough away from their parents and you happen to be nearby, they 100% will begin to follow you. It warms your heart a little bit, but it also worries you because you don’t want to upset their parents, but the adult cows just think it’s really funny. Like, it is so obvious that you’re not a full cow and that you’re barely an adult yourself, but the baby cows will still follow you and it is just so funny.

I feel like when you get very frustrated, you begin to moo or let out huffs and puffs. The boys find it very funny, but also not to bring it up to you. One time Wilbur made the mistake of laughing out loud when you mooed…. You charged him and tackled him and broke the table. So now the boys have just learned to try and comfort you and then laugh in private.

Listen I have seen many photos and videos of cows being petted and owners sitting in fields and the cow comes over and just lays on them and cuddles them and so like I feel that a lot of the times when you would find someone sitting on the couch or something, just chilling, you would try and cuddle up to them. Tommy and Techno wouldn’t like it as much, they would give you like a pat on the back before shoving you off. Philza would chuckle but allow you to rest there. Wilbur would absolutely let you cuddle up to him and oftentimes would wrap his arms around you and hold you to him. I also feel like he would be the only one to do it back to you. If you were just seated somewhere lounging around, Wilbur would absolutely flop down on top of you, crushing you a little bit, yes, but it is still nice… not having to be the one to initiate the contact. So you would just giggle and wrap your arms around him and nuzzle your face either in his curly hair or in his chest, it depends on how he flops down on top of you. Wilbur would also absolutely pet and stroke your horns and would just let you relax completely against him.

A lot of the time you can be found with a piece of hay hanging out of your mouth. I feel like you would just enjoy the taste but also just the feel of the plant on your tongue as you chew would be so comforting. Philza at first would try to take the thin straw out of your mouth but after you almost cried about it, he decided to just left it alone and let you do whatever you want. Tommy still tries to steal it from your mouth, but you’ve gotten good at chomping down on it and not letting it go. Techno gives you a little bit of a weird look but goes on about it. (It’s because he absolutely has tried it without you knowing and he hated it so much and he has no idea how the hell you keep doing it.) Wilbur I feel would be the one to help you keep your supply of it and would always get you a new one if you needed it. I feel like you would offer him one and he will sometimes accept it, but he doesn’t like it but he doesn’t want you to feel that your habits are weird so he partakes to make you feel better. Also for eating, you would love everything wheat based and would have a field day with things like that. You absolutely cannot and will not eat beef and you will not be around if anyone around you is eating it. It makes you sick to your stomach. So you don’t eat a lot of meat and you’re mostly vegetarian. Philza is more than willing to adjust his recipes to accommodate you and make sure that you’re okay at meal times.

Minecraft cows avoid going into water at about all costs, so I feel like you would do the same. You would avoid everything from stepping in puddles to swimming across the river to even having a beach day at the ocean. I think you would be fine, it’s just the floating in water and having your feet not be completely on solid ground that you hate. Your family sometimes makes fun of you for it because they have to build a bridge of some kind or craft a boat for the smallest thing of water, but in reality they want you to be comfortable and so they do everything to make it so you could have your way when it comes to the water like that. When Wilbur becomes Ghostbur, Ghostbur likes to hang out with you a lot because you’re good company but also because he knows you don’t go anywhere near water, and he’s allergic to water so it works out very well for you.

Cat hybrid w Creeper hybrid Sam

So 🌻 had this fucking amazing idea okay. Like all credit for this idea goes to her, I am but a simple writer that wrote it out a little bit more, but this was completely her idea and she has my whole heart because she has a big brain. It is praise 🌻 hours friends!

So you are the newest addition to the SMP, a cute little cat hybrid. You have cute, fluffy ears that sit on the top of your head and you have a matching fluffy tail that pokes out behind you. Everyone that has met you agrees that you’re very cute and very sweet to everyone. Everyone loves to be around you and loves to spend time with you….. Well almost everyone.

As we have learned in previous hybrid headcanons, Sam is terrified of cats. It’s the creeper in him and he feels so bad that he avoids you so admently, but he cannot help the trepidation that swells in his veins when he’s near you. He has tried to approach you several times, tried to properly introduce himself, but he just couldn’t get close enough to you to do it. Sam had definitely asked others about you though and had fallen in love with you through the other’s descriptions and through watching you from afar, trying his best not to be seen. You weren’t dumb though, you knew he was there watching you. And when he took his eyes off of you, you let your stare turn to him as well. You let yourself stare at the man that refused to approach you. You, like him, asked around about him and you learned about him through others. You learned about how passionate he was about his work, how kind he was, how he had practically adopted a few of the minors on the server, how he was such a nice guy. It made your heart ache. If he was such a nice guy, why would he only watch you from a far then? Why wouldn’t he approach you? He must hate you… Yeah that had to be it, he heard about you, watched you for a bit, and decided that he didn’t like you… It made you hella sad, but it’s just something you would have to deal with and live with…. Oh well…. Better get building your house.

Sam decided that he would try to make a move on you. He wanted to get to know you better through your own words and stuff, not just what others had to think about you. So he decided he would try to approach you while you were working on your house. Sam didn’t want to come empty handed, he figured he had already made a bad enough impression on you by not approaching you sooner, so he picks some flowers, roses and sunflowers because I’m a self indulgent bitch, and he took a few deep breaths before making his way to the plot of land that you have claimed as your own. He finds you working on the front wall of your house and he finds it very easy to approach you when you’re not paying attention to him. He is getting rather close to you, the closest he’s ever been to you and he’s really proud of himself. You must have sensed him, or heard his footsteps or something though, because your head snaps to look over your shoulder and your gaze locks with his and every single bit of confidence that Sam had worked up leaves his body. The fear of being around a cat fills him and he can’t help but let the flowers fall from his fingers and he sprints away. “Hey! Wait!” You call after him, rushing forward a bit, trying to stop him. But he’s gone so fast that you can only get to where he dropped the flowers before he’s out of sight. You can’t help but let out a sigh as you turn around. He must really hate you huh? Your eyes catch the flowers on the ground and you bend down to pick them up. Are these for you? They must be if he brought them here… Even if he did drop them on the ground to run away from you. Either way, you brought the pretty flowers to your nose and took a deep breath through your nose, inhaling the sweet scent. You can’t help the smile that curls on your face as you make your way “inside” of you under construction. You very quickly find a vase and get some water and set the flowers on a makeshift table in your house before going back to building the walls, every time your gaze catching the flowers, a grin growing on your face.

Sam berates himself when he gets back home for how stupid it was for him to just leave like that. So he tells himself he is going to go back tomorrow and at least introduce himself to you. He will speak at least three words to you. The next day comes and he does as he’s promised. He gathers all of his confidence again before making his way back to your land. He freezes just outside the property line and sees that you have constructed your walls and you are now working on your roof. Your back is to him once again and so he lets out a deep breath before deciding to make the first move. “Hi there!” He shouts from his spot, about 25 blocks away from you. Your attention moves from what you were doing to the man that called out to you. You were very surprised to find Sam standing there. “Hi! Can I help you with something?” You call back. Sam takes a deep breath, happiness filling him at the fact you were actually having a conversation and he wasn’t running. “I uh, I just wanted to introduce myself to you. I’m Sam, it’s very nice to meet you.” You give the man a warm smile, “I’m Y/N. It’s very nice to finally meet you Sam… I must admit, I thought that maybe you hated me because you seemed to avoid me like the plague,” you tease, moving a few materials around before sitting down to face him. A blush that you can’t see spreads across his face as he scratches the back of his neck as he subconsciously takes a few steps forward. “Yeah, sorry about that. I don’t hate you… It’s just that you’re a cat hybrid and my creeper side doesn’t like that very much. I’m sorry I made it seem like I hated you.” It all made so much sense to you now and you couldn’t help but feel bad for feeling that he hated you. “Oh!” You let out, laughing at yourself causing Sam to smile, he liked your laugh. “That’s right… I forgot that. Well, I’m sorry I scare you” you claim with a giggle. Sam gives you a slight smile as he takes another few steps forward, “It’s alright, not your fault. Just both of our natures,” Sam claims eliciting a hum out of you as you nod your head.

The two of you take the next few minutes to get to know each other just a bit better. Even though you scare him still a little bit, Sam can’t help but inch his way toward you. You notice this but don’t say anything about it, you only smile.

Sam is telling you about his latest redstone project when it happens. You momentarily forget your on your roof and so you move to lean in closer to hear him better and it happens. You slip. You feel yourself falling from your roof. It’s pretty high up, easily at least 15 blocks high. You’re pretty relaxed about it, but Sam is panicking. He makes the split decision and he rushes forward and catches you in his arms. Half of his mind is screaming for him to run away from you by the other half is screaming for him to stay and make sure you're okay. You are very surprised to land in his arms but it is a very welcome surprise. You two lock eyes and you give him a big smile. “Hey” you greet casually. Sam gives a big gulp before giving you a nervous smile back, “Hey.” You have a very quick mental debate with yourself before saying screw it to yourself, “Guess you could say I fell for you huh?” The joke causes a bit of tension to leave Sam and he lets out a little giggle and shakes his head. “Guess you could say I caught feelings then huh?” he retorts with a cheesy grin. You blush a little bit before leaning up and kissing his cheek making him blush too. “Do you want to go on a date with me?” Sam blurts out. You’re a bit surprised at the question but you very quickly nod, “I would love to Sam. Are you sure you’ll be okay though?” You ask him. He gives you a reassuring smile and nod. “Yeah, I’ll be fine. Now that I know what it’s like to hold you I’m not sure I ever want to let you go.” The heat returns to your cheeks, but like a million times hotter now. You left speechless for a few moments causing Sam to chuckle and set you down, but his hands don’t leave your waist and yours don’t leave his shoulders. You two simply beam at each other for a while before Sam looks over to your house, “Do you want some help?” he offers. You give a series of quick nods, “Yeah that would be wonderful… Thank you.”

(So I was going to make it a little funny because cats don’t take fall damage and so like hybrid cat reader wouldn’t either but then I began writing the little scene at the end and I liked that a lot and I couldn’t find anywhere to squeeze it in without ruining the mood. So just please think about how Sam got over his fear of cats because he thought you were in danger of getting hurt, but you weren’t because fall damage doesn’t affect you, and so he caught you even though it terrified him… That’s all. Hope you enjoyed)

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kermittedfelony · 2 years

Text

a little leading to alot

C H A P T E R 4

Nobody asked for it but here is the final part!! BIG BIG TRIGGER WARNING SO MAKE SURE U READ THAT THXXX Enjoy <3

Word count: 3941

**TW: SUICIDE ATTEMPT**

Next time you woke, it was 1140 pm.

The utter emptiness you felt made itself known to you in several ways. The one that was the most impactful to you and noticeable to the team was the isolation.

When you were around people, your social battery drained faster and faster, leaving you exhausted after a simple conversation. You felt like you weren’t bringing anything to the table and were rarely even in the mood to socialise, so why not just stay in the private sanctuary that is your room? Why make people feel awkward when you could only manage one-word responses, or no responses at all? Being in your room allowed you to avoid the loud and boisterous auras of Sam and Peter, avoid making Steve and Bucky feel guilty when you couldn’t muster the energy to reply, and most importantly, avoid the prying eyes and questions from Natasha.

It was only when all your symptoms came to a peak that you knew something was wrong, so wrong that you couldn’t deny it to yourself. To top it all off, you had projected to everyone that you were doing good, you were stable and content. You felt like you couldn’t speak up and change your narrative for fear that the others would think you were doing it for attention. So naturally, when Steve assigned you and Nat a mission, you had to say yes, even though you knew you really shouldn’t be in the field.

The job itself was simple, making you think you could actually do it and not put anyone in danger. All you had to do was get in, confirm/deny reported activity within the ‘shut-down’ Hydra base, and get out. No engaging with whoever may be present. Easy peasy lemon squeasy.

STRESSED DEPRESSED LEMON ZEST.

You and Natasha entered and found the first floor (of two) clear of any persons. It definitely lulled you into a false sense of security. How were you to know that the people with guns had seen who was coming for them and decided to take up a full-frontal defensive position on the second floor? All they had to do was lure you two into a sense of safety with complete silence and hiding all the signs of life on floor one and unleash a whirlwind of bullets on floor two. And you both walked right into the fucking trap. Well, maybe it was only you. You with your exhaustion and eagerness to get the mission over with so you could go back to your dark quiet room. You took the leading position, with Nat bringing up the rear, and half-heartedly peaked through the door at the top of the stairs. In retrospect, if you had properly looked, you would have seen how the worktables were set up in a makeshift barricade, blocking you from advancing and giving the Hydra soldiers decent cover to shoot from. But you didn’t fucking look and simply glanced at a small section beyond the door before easing it open and walking through. Sure, your gun was up, but what is a gun going to do about 5 bullets coming straight at you. Lucky for you (not so lucky in your mind), the Hydra soldiers are akin to stormtroopers in many ways, including the fact that they can’t accurately shoot to save themselves. Out of five bullets, only two hit you: one in the thigh and one in the abdomen, just above your hip bone. The force of the bullets pushed you back through the doorway, causing you to collapse on the landing. Nat, acting on instinct, kicked the door shut and dragged you by the armpits to an alcove just to the side. Once she had you out of direct fire, she unclipped a shock grenade, opened the door and chucked it in. The sound of a blast was accompanied by yelps and bodies hitting the ground.

“That will keep them down for 10 minutes. Enough time for us to get out. Jesus y/n what the fuck were you thinking. Acting like some gods damned recruit,” Nat harshly reprimanded you, as she pulled out a bandage from one of her infinite pockets. In order to see what she was dealing with, Nat cut away at the thigh section of your suit so that she could get to the bullet wound. You flinched and tried to stop her, but she was too quick.

The only sign of shock she gave at the mutilation in front of her was a quick intake of breath. She knew you had cut recently, but this much damage in that amount of time? You had to have been doing it at least once a day. Nat allowed herself three seconds to steady her hands before quickly wrapping the gunshot wound, tightening it enough to earn a wince out of you.

“I know, I’m sorry. I need to make it tight, so it stops the flow.” You both knew how to wrap a gunshot wound in the leg. It was what the pressure of the bandage was also affecting that Nat was apologising for. She also made a quick wrap around your abdomen, slowing the flow of blood there as well.

“Alright, we have about four minutes left, let’s get out of here, yeah?” You nodded at her words, letting her take control. Once Nat was standing, she hauled you up by your hand, you groaning at the strain in your thigh and abdomen. The blood loss hit you hard as soon as you were upright. So much so that you didn’t even realise as your hand was flung over her shoulder. With you leaning almost all of your weight on Nat, you both made the descent to the first floor and out of the building. Your first step outside of the building had you crumpling, falling face first towards the ground, black crowding your vision. You must have blacked out, as the next thing you knew, you were being carried bridal style while Nat used her comm piece to quickly give an update to Steve.

“-five, maybe six hostiles present. Two got a shot on y/n, thigh and stomach. Significant blood loss. I’ve got us out of the building, and we’ll be on the quinjet soon.”

You heard Steve’s muffled reply, “alright Nat. We’ll have the med bay prepped and ready.”

Nat dropped her hand from her ear and glanced down at you, seeing your glazed eyes barely open. “You’re okay y/n, just hang on. We’re almost at the jet. I need you to stay awake for me, alright?” She watched as your eyelids began to droop closed once more. Nat swore and broke out into a run. The pain from being jostled brought you back to the present and you watched a single tear roll down Natasha’s cheek. You knew then that you had fucked up. Next time you were in a life-threatening situation, you had to make sure nobody was there to watch you fall.

- - -

You woke to white walls and an incessant beeping. You were warm and comfortable, despite there being an ache in your thigh. The deep breath you took brought forward a sharp pain in your abdomen, causing you to inhale quickly and wince. You went to move your hand to where it hurt but found it weighed down. The movement caused Nat to slowly wake up herself and when you two made eye contact, her face crumpled.

“Hey, hey, there’s no need to cry Nat. I’m right here, I’m okay.”

“Yes, but you almost weren’t y/n!” Nat shouted, “Don’t you get that? You almost fucking died in my arms!”

“I know, I know. I made a mistake-”

“A mistake? A fucking mistake? Is that what we’re calling it now? A mistake is wearing odd socks or putting salt instead of pepper. What you did was complete and utter stupidity. We both know you’re better trained that charging into a room without having a proper look first. You were careless, reckless, and frankly, selfish. I know right now you don’t give a shit about anything, but I do! I fucking do!” Nat took a deep breath and ran a hand through her hair.

“I- I’m sorry Nat, I didn- “

“No, stop right there. Don’t you dare say you meant to try. It is very clear you couldn’t care less what happens to you right now.”

At your quizzical look, Nat went on, “You think I haven’t noticed? That Wanda and I haven’t noticed? We watch as you walk through the halls like a wraith, a shadow of yourself. You’re not taking care of yourself, you’re not showering, eating properly or training. You’ve been isolating again and have the social battery of a gods damned plank of wood. And to top it all off, you’ve relapsed, heavily, with the self-harming.”

The assertive manner Nat used to detail what you were going through made your face flush with embarrassment; if it was that obvious, everyone must know about it. You shrank down, your shoulders curving slightly inwards. Trying, desperately to become smaller so that Nat would forget you were there and leave.

Nat was also a world-class spy and was trained in body language.

She sighed at your timidness, “y/n, none of us are mad or disappointed or whatever else you’re thinking. We’re worried. We want to support you.” At your lack or a response, Nat leaned in to cover your body with hers in an attempt at a hug, even though you were still lying down. “I just want youto want to be here. I need you. I know that may seem selfish when I have some understanding of what’s going on in your head from last time this happened, but I refuse to let you go. You are my person, my twin flame.” When you still refused to make eye contact, Nat sighed and stood up. “I’m going to go get the doctor, I’ll be back in a minute.”

As soon as Nat left the room, you let out a breath you didn’t know you were holding. You knew most of Nat’s anger wasn’t directed at you, but rather at herself, for not stopping Steve from assigning you to this mission when she knew your mental state. But shit, it had hit home. Everything you did was bringing her and other people down, making them worry. You didn’t deserve their worry. You were wasting their time. It was clear from your ‘mistake’ that you were also a liability to the team. You had no real purpose here. Anywhere. You moved to sit up and let your legs hang off the side of the bed. There were still enough painkillers in you that the pain wasn’t debilitating. You knew now, while you wouldn’t bump into anyone (it was late at night), was your chance. At freedom, escape from this prison that had become your mind.

You tentatively placed your feet on the floor and stood. Took a step. The pain in your thigh became sharp when you used that leg, but it was manageable. It wasn’t far to the elevator.

As you made your way to the doorway, you swiped a couple bottles of painkillers and sleeping medications. You looked left and right out of the door. All clear. You turned left, towards the main hallway. Left again and you would find the elevator. You pressed the up arrow on the elevator that wasn’t in use and stared down at your feet as you waited. When you looked up at the ding, it wasn’t your elevator doors that opened, but the other ones. And who would step out? Oh, you know, the mind-reader, the one who could easily slip through your mental walls and stop your plans where they stood. Your heartbeat increased as anxiety spread through your body.

Wanda stepped out of the elevator and jumped a little when she saw you standing there. “Y/n! what are you doing up? You need to be resting!”

Your mind went blank, and you opened and closed your mouth like a fish, desperately trying to come up with a viable excuse.

Wanda tilted her head in that mystical way of hers, as if she could see into your mind without ever having to use her powers.

“Y/n? Everything okay? You really should be in bed, not standing.” She took a step towards you, hands slightly raised in a placating way, as if she knew if she moved to quickly you would bolt.

An idea surfaced in your mind, and you stuttered, “Uh Ye-yeah Wands, everything’s okay. You know how stuffy those rooms get, no windows or anything. I’m just going up to watch the stars and get some fresh air. Nat is waiting up there for me. She wouldn’t let me go alone, and you know how protective she is.”

Wanda’s mouth quirked up a bit on the side, as if she wanted to believe your story, but something wasn’t quite right. She could either call you out on it, or just trust your word. She decided on the latter and gave a nod. Just then, your elevator arrived at your floor. You limped into it and pressed the button for the roof.

“Alright well, enjoy. I’ll see you tomorrow, y/n.”

You made eye-contact with Wanda at her words, your throat becoming slightly choked. You couldn’t cry now; it would give away your mission. So, you hastily cleared your throat and replied, “Yeah, see ya.”

The doors closed, and Wanda continued on her way to see Vision, who was having more humanoid implants put into his body. When she went to his room, she saw he was still in surgery. She waited, five, ten minutes before letting out a big yawn and deciding to come back in the morning. As she walked towards the elevators, she ran into Nat. Nat, who should be with you.

The shock that quickly turned into horror on Wanda’s face caught Nat’s attention, “Wanda? What, what is it? Is y/n okay, please don’t tell me the- “

“Roof. Roof now. You need to go. Shit Nat, we need to go now!”

Nat peered around Wanda into your room, to see the bed empty. Her face drained of colour as her brain finally acknowledged the location Wanda gave. Both women ran to the elevators, frantically pressing the buttons, and hopped into the lift as soon as it opened.

- - -

The night sky truly was serene tonight, the blackness littered with stars. You leant on the railing.

- - -

The elevator would just not move fast enough. The two women shared an anxious glance. Wanda’s eyes lit up as she used her powers to sense if you were still alive, still breathing. When Wanda got confirmation, she gave Nat a small nod. The other woman exhaled a breath. She needed to be calm when she got up there; if she was upset or anxious, it would only worsen what you were feeling. She knew she shouldn’t have had that outburst in the med bay. She called you selfish for fucks sake. Of course that would push you over the edge, especially when it came from the person you trusted most in this world.

- - -

You poured out five pills and quickly swallowed them. You didn’t bring any water and you were not a good dry swallower. You would have to do it in small amounts. Another five went down the hatch. You took a breath. You were really doing this; you were getting your escape. You poured seven more pills into your cupped hand and brought it towards your mouth. The inertia caused by your hand suddenly stopping caused the pills to spill.

“Shit, shit, sh- “

“Y/N! STOP. STOP PLEASE.” You whipped your head around and saw Nat coming towards you while Wanda stayed back and used her powers to prevent you from swallowing more pills. “Y/n please, I need you to listen to me, I’m begging you.”

The way in which you were being controlled by Wanda made anger bubble to the surface

“BACK THE FUCK UP AND LEAVE ME ALONE,” you shouted back. You turned back towards the bottle, but Wanda sent it flying before you could get to it. You screamed in anger. You were being herded into a corner. You only had one option left: jump. As you made to leap over the railing of the roof, Nat flung a hand out behind her to stop Wanda from using her powers. If you did not feel like you had a choice in this situation, you would never properly trust them again. In your mind, they would become the bad guys.

You had one foot up on the railing, hands braced to hoist yourself up.

“Y/N! y/n, look at me, please. PLEASE.” The desperation in Nat’s voice and the lack of magical red bindings holding you in place made you pause and look over your shoulder to Nat, who was also noticeably a lot closer than before. “Just, just stop a minute and think. Slow down and rationalise.”

Nat knew one of your shortcomings was your impulsivity. You and her had had many altercations where it got in the way and the best method to fix it was to slow you down, and to push yourself to think. Which is exactly what Nat was doing right at this moment.

The request to think caught you off guard, the familiar solution hitting home. Your eyes slid to the ground, and you blinked rapidly, trying to wash away the emotion. But then you remembered why you were up here. Your life was a waste, you were a waste. Simply existing to exist, not for any purpose. You stood up to your full height on the railing, causing Nat to step forward some more, hands reaching toward you, but not quite willing to touch you in case you spooked.

In a quieter voice, Nat said, “y/n, please. We are in this together, this life together, you and me, me and you. I won’t let you give up on your future.”

“What future Nat? I don’t have one. Whether it’s today, in a week or even a year, I will come back to square one. No matter how hard I try, how much therapy, I keep coming back to this spot. It won’t change.”

“You will make it change, and I will help you every step of the way. You can survive and live, I know you can. I also know you don’t want to jump… you literally have a fear of heights.”

She wasn’t wrong; regardless of her words, as soon as you looked down, your fear started to battle your desperation to die.

You bent your knees and sat down on the ledge. You weren’t quite ready to get back onto the roof proper. Slowly, Nat climbed up and sat a few feet away from you; close enough to touch, but far enough away to give you the space to talk.

You started playing with the rings on your hand while you let your head drop, “I don’t know where to go from here Nat. The others will think me some worthless coward, just doing this for attention. I won’t be able to face them.”

“Okay, then we’ll only tell the people that need to know. This is between you and me. Even Wanda has gone back downstairs. And if you don’t know where to go from here, that’s okay too. Nobody expects you to just bounce back up. We will take it one day at a time.”

Just through her voice, you could tell Nat was being completely genuine. She truly meant every word she was saying. As the full reality of what you were about to do hit you, tears bled from your eyes, and you covered your face with your hands.

Nat murmured some comforting Russian phrases before getting up behind you and helping you back onto the roof. You quickly collapsed into her arms; the pills you did manage to swallow finally taking affect.

Nat, missing nothing, asked, “how many did you manage to take, detka?”

In-between sobs you replied, “j-just ten.”

“Of the painkillers? Or the sleeping ones?”

“I’m n-not sure.” At your inability to answer, you started to cry more. Nat simply pulled you tighter against her chest and rubbed soothing circles on your back, shushing you the whole time. Her warmth, strength and comfort quickly lulled you. Soon, your tears stopped, and your eyes started to droop. Nat must have messaged Wanda to come back up to help you two down to the med bay again, as you heard the elevator ding and saw her walk back out. When she saw you sitting on the ground with Nat, she hurried her step, so that she could come to the other side of you.

“Oh malyshka, come here, come here.” As she pulled you into her chest, you wrapped your arms around her middle, Wanda’s vanilla scent wrapping itself around you. Nat stood up and wiped away her tears, found the bottles of pills and put them in her pockets. She wouldn’t allow you or anyone else to find that kind of opportunity up here. When she walked back over to you and Wanda, both women helped you stand up. The pills were really taking affect; you were so relaxed that your muscles were weakened. Nat easily hoisted you up bridal style and walked towards the elevator. On the ride down, you properly fell asleep.

Wanda leaned against the side of the elevator, Nat doing the same.

“That could have gone very, very wrong.” Wanda merely nodded her agreement. “Thank you, for helping and letting me take control of the situation.”

“Yeah, well, I knew you had helped them last time; you had the most experience.”

Nat let out a soft laugh, “Yeah, I guess. Hopefully I won’t gain any more.”

“With the support they’ll have, I doubt you’ll need to. We’ll both be there for them every step of the way. They won’t go through this alone.”

Once they made it back to the med-bay, and you were comfortably situated on the bed, Wanda took the bed next to yours while Nat sat in the chair by your bed. With the lights off, Nat lightly stroked your hair while she held onto your hand. You stirred and squeezed her hand to let her know you were awake.

You quietly murmured, “thank you, Nat. For saving me. Again.”

Nat chuckled, “anytime, detka. You know I’m always here for you. Just come to me earlier next time, IF there’s a next time.”

“I will, I pinkie promise I will.”

Nat linked your pinkies together and you both shook. It was an unbroken rule that pinkie promises were sacred between you two. She knew she could trust your word.

“Now please get in here with me, I’m cold as hell.” Your joke earned another chuckle from Nat, and she climbed into the bed beside you, careful not to jostle your wounds. You lay your head on her chest and wrapped your arms as tight as you could manage around her middle. As you drifted off to the beating of her heart, you knew that with Nat and Wanda by your side, you could do this. You could slodge through the shit that was your life at the moment and find a new way to live, one that could sustain you, even through the ups and the downs. You would do it for the women in the room with you, but also for yourself, so that you could show yourself it was always possible.

A/n: and there u have it friends. Hope y’all enjoyed, pls send through any feedback or comments you have and let me know what you think! Love from kermy <3

#nat x reader #natasha romanov #natasha romanoff #wanda x reader #wanda maximoff #fanfic #marvel #mental illness #mental health #coping

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sunflowergirl522 · 2 years

Text

Operation Boyfriend Scenario 6

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Reader

Summary: It’s girls night

Word count: 3109

Series Masterlist

Plans were made for girls night to happen Thursday since that was the last day you, Wanda and Kate had classes that week and Kate’s roommate just had a class Friday evening. It worked out in a way that it starts off your birthday weekend and you couldn’t think of a better way to spend it. You just have to kick Pietro out for the night which gives you the idea to force the guys to have their own boys night. You get Sam and Bucky over with a simple urgent text around noon.

“What’s wrong? Why’d you need us over here so quickly?” Bucky goes straight to your side when he walks into the apartment and his hands go to the sides of your face to search for any sign of distress.

“Nothings wrong, Buck. I’m just placing Pietro in your guys care tonight. Go have a boys night and like drink or play video games or something. Just stay away from girls' night.”

“Oh this is gonna be fun.” Sam says as he high fives Pietro with the news of their guys' night. They soon get into a conversation of what kind of games and consoles they have and your attention goes back to a frowning Bucky.

“I can’t babysit your boyfriend tonight Y/n. I have to go to sleep early because I have something I have to do early tomorrow.”

“You don’t have to stay up all night with them Buck, just keep him away from the apartment till you go to sleep then leave it all up to Sam.”

“Alright, okay I can do that. Sorry I’m just stressing out about tomorrow.”

“It’s alright.” You shrug before poking at his chest. “But stop stressing no one's allowed to be upset on my birthday.”

“Doll, I think that only works for you.” He sends a teasing smile your way. “Besides, your birthday isn’t till Saturday.”

“This whole weekend is my birthday. Now go away, the girls are gonna be here soon.”

“Have fun tonight girls!” Sam hugs you and Wanda before leaving the apartment.

“Goodbye Wanda.” Pietro lays a kiss on his sister's head before moving over to you. “Bye Printesa, I’ll see you in the morning, yes?”

“Yeah, maybe the afternoon, depending on when everyone wakes up.” You both smile at each other before he kisses the edge of your lips and backs away with a blush on his face. You follow Bucky to the door where he pulls you into one of his bear hugs.

“Have tons of fun tonight doll. I’ll see you tomorrow.”

“Good luck on whatever you’re doing tomorrow morning Buck. I hope you can stop stressing out so much soon.”

“If you need anything don’t hesitate to call alright? That goes for you too Wanda!” He yells back into the apartment just to get a ‘get out of here lover boy’ yelled back at him. He chuckles a bit, bids you another goodbye and starts down the hall.

“So what are we up to tonight Wands?” You skip into the kitchen finding her doing the few dishes from this morning.

“Probably watch some cheesy rom coms or maybe some horror movies and drink. Y'know easy things to help get to know each other more. Really we can do whatever you want to do though.”

“Alright, do we have snacks?”

“Are you kidding me? There’s still how many cookies and brownies in this apartment and you’re asking about snacks?”

“Well yeah, do we still have chips and popcorn? I just want to have choices.”

“It’s your job to keep the snack cabinet stocked, you should know.” She shrugs and turns around to face you as she kicks the dishwasher closed.

“Good point, we should then because I think I just went out with Sam to stock it up a few days ago.” You nod to yourself as you speak looking around the kitchen before your eyes settle on Wanda again. A smile spreads across your lips to match the one on her face. “Wanna help me gather up all the blankets and pillows?”

“Start in my room then move to the jackpot in yours?”

“You already know it.”

It takes the two of you no time to get all of the pillows and blankets out of Wanda's room, she only has three pillows and a couple of blankets. When it came to your room though, you each needed to take multiple trips. Your bed is mainly just a pile of pillows and you own way too many blankets because you’re always cold. Wanda yells at you everytime you come home with a new one. On your last trip to get the last few pillows your phone vibrates and you pull it out on your way out.

Steve: Hey Y/n/n Bucky told me you’re having a girls night tonight have fun! I’m glad to hear you’re making new friends. And just wanted to tell you how proud and happy I am to see you coming out of your shell!

You smile down at the message as your vision blurs with unshed tears. You send him a quick response telling him how much you love him as there's a knock at the door. You will the tears away and run out to meet Wanda at the door while throwing the pillows in the living room.

“Hey guys!” Kate walks in first followed by a smiling blonde. “This is my roommate Yelena.”

“The party is here!” She says holding up two bottles of pink whitney.

“Hi, I’m Y/n this is Wanda.” You wave at Yelena before giving Kate a hug.

“I also brought mac and cheese and hot sauce. I don’t know if you guys have eaten yet but I’m hungry. Just tell me you have actual silverware and not plastic takeout ones.” Kate groans at her words.

“When are you gonna let that go. I have real silverware now.” She turns back to you and Wanda and starts to take her bag off. “I brought snacks, lemonade and some movies.” Wanda starts to lead the way into the living room and Yelena pauses by your side, dropping her voice into a whisper.

“Don’t let her fool you, she brought Twilight and The Hunger Games. Don’t worry though I snuck in some good ones.” She winks and the two of you chuckle as you follow them.

One pot of mac and cheese and half of a twilight drinking game later you’re all a little tipsy and not paying attention to the next movie that’s playing and instead you’re all talking about whatever comes to your mind. Yelena’s explaining how she gets most of her clothes thrift shopping because you can find the coolest things there and you’re hanging onto her every word.

“We should totally have a thrifting date!”

“Yes! That’s perfect!”

“So Y/n.” Kate interrupts yours and Yelena’s screaming. “How’s your fake boyfriend doing?”

“He’s good, I mean Pietro’s always good. I had the biggest crush on him when we first met but he never seemed to be all that interested especially after Wanda shut down the two of us dating.”

“Oh, Y/n I didn’t know you liked him then.” You just shrug.

“It doesn’t matter, the relationship probably would’ve failed like all of my other ones. This way I still get to be friends with him.” You then turn to Kate, your face scrunched up in confusion. “How do you know about the fake boyfriend thing?”

“Oh, Wanda’s brought it up but she didn’t give me the name of who you were trying to make jealous.”

“I thought we weren’t telling anyone about it Wanda.”

“Hey, woah in my defense she doesn’t know Bucky so it’s not like she would be able to tell him he’s your fake boyfriend. And I needed someone to tell me how brilliant the plan is because you sure weren’t.” You sigh and run a hand down your face before taking another shot.

“Wanda here seems to think that our dear friend Bucky is in love with me.”

“He is! And you love him! You’re just both ridiculous and won’t admit it, hell you could be Y/n Barnes right now if you two would’ve said something to each other years ago!”

“Wait hold on, you’re talking about Bucky Barnes? Like dark, moody, always seems to be angry, Bucky Barnes?” Yelena joins in looking shocked.

“Oh trust me he’s not all dark and moody around our Y/n here.” Wanda laughs and gives your shoulder a little shove.

“Why do you know him?”

“Yeah, he’s in one of my history classes and I had him in an English class with me last year. I’ve never seen that man smile and the only times I’ve ever really heard him talk is when he’s fighting with his friend Sam.”

“Yep, that sounds like our grump.”

“Wanda! Bucky’s not all dark and moody, and he smiles all the time. You know that.” You’re more confused at everyones words than upset that they’re being said. You’ve known Bucky forever and sure he can have his moments where he’s grumpy but even then he’s trying to hold back smiles after you try to crack a cheesy joke to him. You knew he could be angry, having cleaned him up a few times after fights that his now hidden anger issues had gotten him into, but he hasn’t had issues with it in years. The two of you had worked on him keeping his anger at bay together.

“Babe, you don’t see him when you’re not around. You’re like this bright light in loverboys life because when you’re not around he’s all frowns and death stares.” Your face scrunches up as you take in her words. “Now lets do more shots!”

A couple shots later and you and Kate are standing across from each other after deciding it would be a brilliant idea to learn how to fight now. The logic being something like if you learn now and perfect it drunk, you’ll be the best when sober. Wanda and Yelena are sitting on the couch laughing at how you get into a Streetfighter stance.

“So how much do you know already?”

“I know how to throw a punch, my cousin taught me that much growing up.” Steve had taken it upon himself to teach you self defense himself after you came home from one class stating that your teacher was a creep. He taught you the right way to throw a punch in his garage after canceling plans with Bucky that same night. To this day you act like you don’t know where to put your thumb when he checks that you still know how just to annoy him. The two of you always chuckle and he shakes his head before pulling you into a hug.

The memories flashing through your head have you smiling and then tearing up as a loneliness unlike no other starts to fill you. It’s a loneliness that can’t be filled by other people and can only be filled by the one person you can’t be around. A loneliness that can only be felt after growing up and constantly being around someone your whole life and then having this great distance between the two of you where you only communicate through texts and calls and only see each other a few times a month if you’re lucky.

“Oh no what happened?” Kate's voice brings your attention back to the girls around you and you notice the tears falling from your eyes. Kate looks over at Wanda who immediately stands up and makes her way over to you, pulling you into a hug the moment she’s in reaching distance.

“What are you feeling right now?” She whispers into your ear.

“Lonely.” There was no point in lying to Wanda about it and besides she understood this kind of loneliness, feeling it all the time with Pietro. Your voice breaks on the word though and you start sobbing into your friend's shoulder.

“Is she okay?” Kate asks, coming up next to you two and hesitantly placing a hand on your shoulder.

“She’s going to be fine. She’s missing Steve, that’s all. When she’s drunk it’s easier to trigger that feeling. Can you take her to the couch while I make a phone call?”

“Yeah, of course.”

The minute you’re sat on the couch Yelena pulls you into a hug and Kate gasps at how quickly her badass roommate has decided to show you physical affection. It had taken her a couple months to get a hug out of Yelena. She wasn’t jealous though she got it, after the one brief moment the two of you had met she had been ready to do anything for you. She knew Yelena had to have felt the same way when she had you try on the flannel she was wearing.

“It’s alright Y/n. You know I understand missing someone like this.”

“You do?” You can just vaguely hear Wanda speaking into her phone but you’re more focused on the blonde in front of you now.

“Yes, my older sister Natasha moved over to the states way before I did. I was left in Russia with our parents and the cult we were stuck in for years without seeing her. And then when I made my way over here we moved in together for a couple years before she got a scholarship to a different school and moved out so I had to move in with Kate. I know it is different relationship than what you and your cousin have but I still miss her desperately.” Kate had been ready to bring up how she didn’t know that but stopped herself when she saw you tackle her friend and hide your face in her throat while Yelena sat there wide eyed about it but still holding you against her in a hug. Kate just started to rub your shoulders to help calm you down.

Bucky was dead asleep when his phone started ringing, or at least as dead asleep as he could be with two drunk assholes yelling in the living room about who’s winning and who’s cheating. He was ready to send it straight to voicemail assuming it was Sam again trying to get him to join them or maybe Steve but he freezes his hand midair when he sees Wanda's name. That wakes him up enough to sit up and basically shove the phone against his ear.

“Hello?”

“Bucky, I need you to come over.”

“Why?” It didn’t matter that it was late and he really needed to sleep and this could just be a drunk Wanda's plan to try to get you and him to hook up again, he was already up and throwing sweatpants on before she could answer.

“Y/n’s having a little bit of a breakdown.”

“I’m on my way.” He hangs up the phone then and just grabs a shirt not bothering to throw it on until he’s already on his way out of the room. He barely gets out an ‘I’ll be back’ to the two men bickering on the couch about a blue shell before he’s out the door.

He doesn’t bother with the knock before he’s rushing into your apartment and into the living room. He finds you curled up on the couch between two girls, your head in the neck of a familiar face. He doesn’t bother with greeting either of the wide eyed girls next to you before he’s kneeling in front of the couch and taking your hands from Yelena's shoulders and keeping them in his own.

“Babydoll, what is it? What’s wrong?”

“Bucky?” You sniffle and you sit up straight, your watery eyes going wide as you take in the man in front of you.

“I’m right here doll what’s wrong?” You dive into his arms and one of them wraps around your back while the other moves so he can caress the back of your head. He looks at the girls on the couch waiting for some sort of explanation.

“She misses Steve.” Wanda says as she walks into the room. “Gotta say you made it here in record timing Barnes.” He ignores her comment and focuses his attention back to you.

“Y/n, doll, darlin’.” The pet names work to get you to look up at him, no longer crying as much as you were before he had shown up. He takes the side of your face in his hands wiping away tears with his thumbs as you lean into his touch. “You want me to call him for you?” He knew it was a bad idea to ask you that when he knew Steve had to wake up earlier than he did the next morning but he hated seeing you cry like this and would do anything to stop it.

“No, it’s too late.” The palm of your hand comes up to rub at your eye as a yawn breaks out. “I don’t want to wake him up.”

“What do you need me to do to feel better?”

“I already feel better.” You murmur as you put your head back into his neck and let out another yawn.

“Well, since you’re here you might as well meet our new friends. Bucky this is Kate and Yelena, guys this is Bucky.”

“Belova.”

“Barnes.” He and the blonde nod at each other in a greeting before he turns to the brunette and offers up his hand to her.

“Thank you for helping take care of her before I could.”

“Oh, it’s no problem really. Honestly I would stop traffic for her and I barely know her. There’s just something about her that makes me want to put all my trust in her or shrink her down and keep her in my pocket for constant good vibes.”

“Kate, you're rambling.” Yelena puts a hand over her mouth before looking back at Bucky. “She’s right though.”

“I know. Alright I’ll leave you girls to it then. I’m gonna put you back on the couch now doll alright?”

“You’re leaving?” The way you look up at him as if him leaving will break your heart makes him never want to again.

“I don’t want to interrupt your girls night any more than I already have.” He places a kiss on your forehead before lifting you up onto the couch. “But I’ll be back tomorrow when I’m done with my thing.”

“Promise?”

“Promise.” He takes your outstretched pinky with his own before giving you one last kiss on the top of your head and leaving.

Series Taglist: @lovelybarnes

Bucky Taglist: @koressecretidentity @stevieintheimpala @unmagically @peachytea01 @the-chocoholic-writer @perksofbeingatrex @rachmmb @quokkatrash @vanillamaa @strawb3rrydr3ss @that-sarcastic-writer @spideyycents @mackycat11 @rosiemotion @dissectiontime @aiyanalevina @mooncaffeine @fanofallthefics @jewelsrocks99 @yoongisdumplingcheeks @sailormajinmoon @sophielovesbarnes @collywobbl @majo240820 @alina02 @toothhurtyam @gaya-is-weird-af @the-lady-vanora

Marvel Taglist: @its-the-autism-innit-luv @pogueslandia @rorysreallyrandom @myalupinblack @lieswithoutfairytales @sugarbutterbailey @1-800-ch3rry @amelia-song-pond @neenieweenie @officiallyunofficialperson @rocketxgirl @fluffy-bnny @bunnyweasley23

#bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky barnes #bucky x you #bucky x y/n #bucky barnes au #bucky barnes x you

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rax-writes · 3 years

Text

More 》 Part Two

Fandom: MCU Pairing: Baron Helmut Zemo x Reader Warnings: Sexual intercourse, choking, hair pulling, oral sex (f!receiving) [reader is a female-identifying individual with a vagina] Notes: Part two of More 》 I cannot thank you guys enough for how well More did, and I hope that you enjoy this addition to it! 》 I honestly didn’t edit this all that extensively, so if there are any errors, please let me know. ♥

At the break of dawn the next morning, you found yourself on a loading dock for shipment containers with Sharon, Bucky, Sam, and Zemo – pretending all the while that nothing had happened between you and the latter individual. You wore a sweater with a high neckline, per Zemo’s suggestion, and interacted with him exactly the same way that you had before. He did a good job at selling the lie as well, although he seemed incapable of keeping his eyes to himself, frequently staring at you for far longer than he should have, that dark, hungry look in his eyes returning if his gaze lingered for too long.

“All right, he’s in there,” Sharon announced, stopping in the middle of the massive metal boxes. “Container four-two-six-one. I’ll keep an eye out while you guys talk to Nagel, but hurry. We’re on borrowed time.”

You accepted one of the earpieces she offered, getting it into place as she walked off. When the four of you entered the container, you found that it was empty, and appeared to have been that way for quite some time.

“Hey, Sharon, you sure this is the right one?” Sam inquired incredulously. “It’s completely empty.”

“Positive. It has to be.”

You entered the container, the other three right behind you, and closed your eyes as they looked around.

“He’s here. I can hear his thoughts,” you announced, then began to pick the doctor’s brain further. “Push against the back wall. There’s a secret passageway.”

Zemo did as you bade him, and sure enough, the wall moved backwards a bit, to allow him to open the hidden door. He shot you a curt nod of approval, then stepped back to allow Sam to enter first, and the rest of you followed suit.

Music filled the air, a swanky song you didn’t recognize, as you stalked through the laboratory, your gun aimed dead ahead and eyes peeled.

“Follow me,” you whispered, taking the lead as you easily navigated to the physical source of Dr. Nagel’s thoughts. When you saw him, his back was to you, slouched over whatever he was working on as he hummed along to the tune. Sam silently walked over and removed the needle from the record that played the music, and Nagel turned around slowly, fear written all over his face.

“Dr. Nagel?”

“Who are you? What do you want?”

“We know you created the super soldier serum.”

“Get out of my lab,” Nagel commanded, as if he was in any position to give orders. He began to walk toward the exit, but you stepped in front of him and stopped him with a hand flat against his bony chest.

“I’m afraid we can’t do that. Not until you tell us what we need to know,” you informed him without speaking, your voice infiltrating his mind. Nagel let out a frightened gasp as he looked behind him, apparently thinking that may be the source of the voice, before his eyes landed on you.

“You,” he whispered, his voice a mix of confusion, fear, and awe as you met his gaze with harsh eyes. “You – you spoke to me, in my head. How did you do that?”

“She can read your mind, and she can also control it. So, I’d advise you to answer our questions, before she forces you to,” Sam threatened, then watched as Nagel took note of Bucky across the room. “And you know who he is, right?” He then grabbed Nagel by the arm and turned him to face Zemo. “This is Baron Zemo. I know you’ve heard of him, too, right?” He dragged Nagel to the nearest wall, shoving him against it as his back collided with the metal grate. “You seem like a pretty smart guy, so you better become conversational real quick.”

“How ‘bout a counter proposal? Make me a better offer, and I’ll talk,” Nagel proposed.

“Guys, we have company,” Sharon’s voice stated through the earpiece. “Every bounty hunter in the city is here. We gotta go!”

Bucky grabbed Nagel by his shirt and dragged him over to a chair, forcing him down roughly before pointing his gun at Nagel’s head, finger on the trigger. He still didn’t look terribly interested in talking, so you lowered your weapon and narrowed your eyes at him, and used your abilities to insight sheer, unadulterated fear in his mind. His eyes widened and he visibly paled as his mind wreaked havoc on itself, instilling a very pure, very powerful terror within him.

“Okay, okay! I’ll talk! Just stop it!”

You ended the onslaught of panic, and raised your gun once again, as your three companions eyed you with curiosity, unsure of what exactly you’d just done to him. But there would be time for an explanation later.

Nagel explained how he formulated the super soldier serum, and you all listened intently to his little tale. That was when you heard it. Like the crack of a twig in an otherwise silent forest, yet making no audible sound at all, you heard it.

“I must kill him.”

You looked over at Zemo as nonchalantly as possible, and his eyes widened slightly when he realized you’d picked up on his decision. The two of you shared tense eye contact for several beats, and you knew that you must make a choice. Allow Zemo to end this man’s life, and end the possibility of additional serums being created, or warn Sam and Bucky of his intentions?

“You know the damage unchecked Super Soldiers can cause. He is dangerous; he must be stopped.”

Zemo spoke directly to you in his mind, and you took the opportunity to dig deeper, searching for any sign that he was going to betray you, Sam, and Bucky. When you found none, you sighed quietly as you made your choice, and returned your attention to Nagel. Out of your peripheral, you saw Zemo begin perusing the room, feeling underneath tables in the lab in search of a secluded weapon.

“Is there any serum in this lab?” Bucky inquired, and when Nagel hesitated, he pressed the barrel of his gun against the man’s temple, prompting an answer of no. “Now what?”

Sharon ran into the room then, announcing, “Guys, we’re seriously outta time here.”

Zemo took her distraction as an opportunity to draw his gun and shoot Nagel in the chest, straight through his heart. Sam tackled Zemo, and Sharon took the gun from his hand, whispering, “What did you do?”

The very next moment, the entire place exploded, erupting into flames as you, Bucky, Sam, and Sharon hit the deck, although Zemo was nowhere to be found when you groaned in pain and looked around the room from your position on the floor. Bucky pulled you to your feet, then Sharon, then Sam, as the four of you exited the container before it could explode from all the chemicals and fire in Nagel’s lab. You didn’t quite make it, as a gas-fueled explosion went off just as you exited the container, but you were far enough away from it that it merely blew your hair forward. Once outside, the adrenaline wore off just enough that you felt a blinding pain in your torso, and looked down to see blood quickly soaking through your sweater.

“Bucky,” you called out, and he turned quickly, a frown forming on his face when he saw your injury. You lifted your shirt to reveal a thin, jagged, three-inch long sliver of metal embedded in the center of your abdomen. Sam turned to bark orders at the two of you, but his face fell as he saw the blood.

Sharon made quick work of removing the metal, which was thankfully only about an inch or less in width, so it wasn’t at all deadly. Truthfully, it wasn't that bad of an injury, but god was it bleeding like hell. Bucky yanked off his jacket and handed it to you, instructing you to apply pressure to the wound and stick close to him. Your three companions shot at the bounty hunters that were approaching, and you did your best to fire a few shots yourself, your other hand pressing the jacket firmly against your injury. Sam shot you a disapproving look and told you to focus on yourself, but you ignored him.

While Sam and Bucky began bickering about who should have followed whose orders, there was yet another deafening explosion nearby. You looked in that direction to see Zemo with some sort of mask on, jumping down from atop some storage containers, before leaping over some metal piping and dodging past a man to evade his bullets, then grabbing him by the collar to use him as a human shield. He fired multiple rounds at the nearby bounty hunters, before releasing his grip on the first man and kicking him away, then shot him too. He looked at you through the flames, and you didn’t have to read his mind to know how exhilarated he felt, being truly back in action after spending years in a cell.

If asked, you’d chalk it up to the blood loss, but… goddamn, he looked hot kicking ass like that.

“Go,” Bucky ordered, helping you up and wrapping an arm around your waist to steady and guide you as the four of you made a break for it. Eventually, you reached an open storage container, and Sam helped you into it as Bucky fended off the last few bounty hunters.

When Bucky burst through the back of the container with his vibranium arm, you heard tires screech and an engine rev, before Zemo pulled up in a sports car.

“Supercharged,” he stated with the faintest smile. Christ, he was just a little bit of a goofball, wasn’t he?

“You’re going back to jail,” Sam said angrily, then turned to you. “And you were supposed to tell us if he was going to screw us over.”

“Nagel shouldn’t have been kept alive. I know you don’t like it, but it is the truth,” you reasoned.

“He didn’t have to die though, dammit! He could have just gone to jail, locked up for the rest of his life!”

“Oh, yes, just like Zemo? The man standing five feet from us, very much not in jail?” you countered, and he frowned, knowing you had a point. “Once word got out that Nagel knew how to recreate the serum, every power hungry individual and group in the world would be trying to find a way to either break him out or ask him about it. And I’m sure he would have told anyone for the right price. Even if the serum didn’t fall into the hands of the wrong people, even if a seemingly good-natured country like America were to get ahold of it, it could still be used for evil. They clearly don’t have the best moral compass, considering the asshole they gave Captain America’s shield to.”

“Alright, yeah, you’ve made your point,” Sam grumbled. “But I still think we should take Zemo back to jail.”

“Do you want to find Karli or not?” Zemo interjected.

“He’s right, we need him. And there’s three of us, and at least 20 of them. Come on,” Bucky said, pulling open the door of the car before turning around to help you into the vehicle. Only then did Zemo notice the blood on your hands and sweater, and Bucky’s blazer pressed against your torso.

“What happened to her?” Zemo inquired, sitting up to help you sit behind him, and frowning when you grimaced as you maneuvered into your seat, careful not to get any blood on the lovely cream interior. The car didn’t belong to any of you, but it was so beautiful that you hated to harm it.

“Stray shard of metal during the explosion in Nagel’s container,” you explained, grimacing a little as you leaned your head against the headrest behind you, eyes closed as you willed the pain to subside.

“Are you alright?”

“I will be. Probably just needs a few stitches, then I’ll be good as new,” you assured him, shooting him a tight-lipped smile, which he didn’t seem to buy before he removed his trenchcoat and laid it on top of you.

“You look cold,” he muttered, then turned back around in his seat to face the steering wheel.

“Fine, but if you try that shit again…” Sam told Zemo as he climbed into the car.

“Wouldn’t dream of it,” Zemo responded, and you didn’t have to check his thoughts to know that that was a complete lie.

Sharon bid you all goodbye, and Sam thanked her for her help before sliding down into his seat.

“You’re not gonna move your seat up, are you?” Sam asked Bucky.

“No,” he deadpanned, causing you to chuckle under your breath, which earned you a glare from Sam.

The drive back to the airport was mostly silent, which you were thankful for, as you didn’t really have the energy for talking. The bleeding had mostly stopped, but you’d still lost enough and exerted yourself enough that you were feeling fatigued. Zemo parked the car on the landing strip, a short distance from his jet, and was quick to exit the vehicle to help you out. You thought you were doing quite well, until you actually stood up outside the car, and the exhaustion combined with some wooziness from the blood loss made your knees buckle. You would have fallen if Zemo hadn’t lunged forward and wrapped his arms around your waist, looking at you with concern in his eyes.

“Let us get you aboard the plane, and I will dress your wound,” he said, then stooped to scoop you up into his arms bridal-style, and began carrying you toward the jet. Sam and Bucky eyed him curiously, but said nothing. Admittedly, you were too flustered by the close proximity and his gentleness toward you to say anything yourself. You looked over his shoulder, admiring his stolen vehicle one last time.

In Sokovian, you stated with a smile, “I’d like one of those by the way, the Pontiac.”

“Whatever your heart desires,” he responded calmly, matching your Sokovian. As he approached Oeznik, who stood beside the steps of the jet, he continued in that language as he instructed the butler, “Have that car, or one exactly like it, delivered to Berlin as soon as possible, please.”

“Of course, sir.”

Zemo laid you down gently on the couch inside the plane, Sam and Bucky following close behind. Once inside, Oeznik brought Zemo the first aid kit, a needle, and some stitching. Both of the other men offered to do it themselves, but Zemo insisted that he could do a better job than both of them combined. In a manner much unlike the night before, Zemo lifted your shirt to have access to the wound, and set to work. Bucky let you hold his hand as Zemo cleaned the area and did the stitches, while you forced yourself to breathe evenly and ignore the pain of the antiseptic and the needle. A mere fifteen minutes later, you were all patched up, and Zemo was helping you up and sending you to the washroom with a change of clothes.

“You’re gettin’ real sweet on her, Zemo,” you heard Sam note, his tone suspicious. “You better watch yourself, man. Step out of line with her and we won’t hesitate to end you.”

“Understood,” Zemo replied nonchalantly, then you could hear him open a book and take a sip of his champagne. For your own amusement, you took a peek into his mind, and found that he was thinking, “Too late.”

You smiled to yourself as you undressed, carefully removing the blood-soaked sweater and placing it in a trash bag. When you saw yourself in the mirror, you first noticed the hickeys from last night, then the miscellaneous cuts scattered across your skin from the various explosions, and the gauze taped over your wound. The hickeys caused your smile to widen further, and you donned the plain black t-shirt of Zemo’s and his loose gray sweatpants before rejoining them in the lounge. His eyes darkened in that way as his gaze raked up and down your body, clearly enjoying the sight of you in his clothing, but he quickly returned his attention to Sam.

“She died in Riga, a city near the Baltic Sea.”

“I have a place we can go,” Zemo suggested, then leaned back in his seat. “I, for one, am looking forward to coming face-to-face with Karli. Oeznik, we’re changing the course.”

A few hours later, Bucky and Sam had fallen asleep after reclining their chairs and dimming the lights, as you laid on the couch, halfway asleep yourself despite the book in your hands. Once their near-identical snores had filled the cabin for several minutes, Zemo stood from his seat and came to crouch down beside your head. His expression was unreadable as he stared at you, before leaning forward to place a chaste kiss on your lips.

“I must admit, I was very concerned when I saw all the blood on your shirt. I have only just found you, my Sokovian beauty. I would prefer to draw out having the privilege of being acquainted with you for as long as possible, but I cannot do that if you get killed.”

“I’ll do my best to avoid it,” you teased, and he smiled softly. “Thank you for taking such good care of my injury earlier.” He said nothing in response, simply smiled a bit wider and kissed you again, longer this time, but still far shorter and far less intimately than you’d have preferred. You both had to take the others into consideration, even despite their snores, because you were quite certain they’d put a bullet between Zemo’s eyes and send you home immediately if they learned just how “sweet on you” the man truly was. He stood and fetched a blanket from an overhead cabinet before laying it over you, then pressed his lips to your forehead, and returned to his seat.

“Goodnight, Liebling,” Zemo said softly, flicking off the last light in the cabin as he settled back into his seat.

“Goodnight, Baron.”

—————

Riga was somehow comparably chaotic to Madripoor, in terms of the events that transpired there.

Shortly after you arrived at Zemo’s estate, Bucky returned from his "walk" to declare that the Wakandans were there to take Zemo, although he bought some time. In all honesty, you were only half-ass listening to him, because Zemo had exited the bathroom with wet hair and a purple robe that revealed half his chest. He caught you staring and shot you a subtle wink while Sam and Bucky were talking, and you rolled your eyes in return.

Next stop was a refugee camp, where you, Bucky, and Sam searched in vain to get any information on Danya Madani. Zemo somehow managed to accomplish the task, albeit in the creepiest way possible, which you teased him relentlessly for on the walk back to his flat. When he revealed that the girl he'd spoken to told him the time and location of the funeral, but refused to tell any of you, Bucky was quick to anger, snatching the teacup from Zemo’s hand and throwing it against the wall. Sam talked him down before you grabbed Bucky’s arm, pulling him gently toward the door.

"Come on, let's take a walk. I saw a little farmer's market down the road; let's go have a snack and explore a little, yeah?" you asked, your tone calm and soothing to contrast the rage that swarmed in his mind, and Bucky nodded gravely to you as he let you lead him. When you glanced back into the flat as you closed the door behind you, you saw that Zemo was wearing a frown, and a quick peek at his thoughts informed you that he was pouting a bit, wishing you'd have just sent Bucky off and stayed with him. You rolled your eyes internally, then accompanied Bucky to the market, where the two of you ate some plums and took a little walk. When the two of you returned to the flat, Zemo announced that it was time to head to the funeral.

"Did you enjoy your little excursion with James?" Zemo inquired in Sokovian, a tinge of spite in his voice. "Did you relieve his tension?"

"It wouldn't be any of your business if I did," you shot back, also in Sokovian. The disdain on his face disappeared quickly, and you added, "But no, we just took a walk and had some food, as I said we would. Jealousy does not suit you, Baron."

Zemo's voice took on a gentler tone, the Sokovian dripping from his tongue like honey as he said, "My apologies, darling. You are just so magnificent that I want you all to myself; the thought of you with another man is enviable."

"Don’t apologize. Just end it."

He nodded, and before either of you could say anything else, that asshole John Walker showed up, along with his partner. They demanded that Sam and Bucky no longer keep them in the dark, but ultimately, Walker conceded to follow Zemo, and allow Sam the opportunity to talk to Karli alone. As Sam walked off, Walker grabbed Zemo forcefully and handcuffed him to some kind of metal contraption on the wall.

"Aggressive. But I get it," Zemo quipped. He turned to you, and in Sokovian, said, "Once I get out of these, perhaps we could use them to our advantage later this evening."

"Zip it, Zemo."

Unsurprisingly, Walker betrayed his agreement with Sam, barging in on the memorial before Sam's allotted time was up.

"Uh-uh. No, no, no, no. This is a bad idea."

"It hasn't been ten minutes, John. Just sit tight," Bucky responded calmly.

"Don’t do that. Don't patronize me."

"Then do not behave so childishly," you retorted, and Bucky elbowed you while Walker shot you an icy glare. He opened his mouth to say something, but Bucky cut him off, aiming to divert the subject before Walker pushed you any further.

"He knows what he's doing."

Walker was silent for a moment more, before he grabbed the shield – which shouldn't be in his possession in the first place – and marched toward the door. "I'm goin' in."

Bucky stopped him, but after Walker guilt-tripped him, Bucky stepped to the side to allow him to pass. You groaned in exasperation the second Walker walked off.

"Why the hell did you do that?"

"It was either that, or you and me fight Walker and Battlescar – or whatever his stupid code name is. I'm already on probation, and I helped the guy that split up the Avengers break out of prison. I really don't need ‘beat the shit out of the new Cap’ added to my list of wrongdoings," Bucky said, running a hand through his hair before clapping a hand on your shoulder. "Come on, let's go find Sam."

As Bucky jogged off in the direction Walker had gone, you followed while grumbling, "My preference would have been the latter, but no, why would anyone ask for my opinion? I'm just the pet mind reader."

When the two of you caught up to Walker and Hoskins, the former was thrown into a table by Karli, and she ran off. Bucky chased after her, and you took another route to try to intercept her, to no avail. You caught up with Sam and Bucky a few minutes later, out of breath as Sam commented that the building was like a maze, and you wholeheartedly agreed. By the time the three of you found the others, Karli was gone, Walker was just standing there, and Zemo was out cold on the floor.

Walker and Hoskins stated that they were going to search for Karli, and ran off. Bucky threw Zemo over his shoulder like a damn ragdoll, and the three of you trudged back to Zemo’s flat, a little worn out and a little defeated. Once there, Bucky threw him down on the couch, and Zemo bounced limply atop the cushions, still unconscious. Sam began working on his laptop, and Bucky went on yet another walk, while you searched for the first aid kit.

Zemo looked surprisingly peaceful and non-threatening as he laid there, appearing to be asleep. You kneeled beside his head and lightly applied some antiseptic on the cut left by Cap's shield, right at the top of his hairline, and you found yourself admiring him. He had soft features for a man so dark inside; soft chestnut brown hair, adorable nose, slight bit of stubble across his gentle jawline and neck. You began dabbing the antiseptic again, still lost in your own thoughts when he awoke very suddenly, grabbing your wrist in a fierce grip out of reflex. Zemo's eyes were wide when he first opened them, but upon seeing you, he visibly relaxed and released his grip on you.

"Apologies," he whispered, then groaned softly when he felt the pain in his head. You stood silently and retrieved a rag from the drawer beside the sink, wetting it with cold water, then filled a glass with some ice and brandy and returned, handing both items to Zemo. He thanked you very sincerely, then laid the rag over his forehead and eyes, and held the glass atop his chest.

You were grateful that Sam hadn't noticed you doting on him, too focused on his laptop, because he'd have definitely asked you about it, and you didn't even have an answer for yourself. It wasn't like there was any need or obligation for you to tend to him like that, and yet you did without even thinking. As you took a seat opposite Zemo on the couch, you told yourself that it was merely payback for how he assisted you with your own injury the day before, and left it at that.

It wasn't long before Walker and his partner showed up again, demanding to place Zemo under arrest. You, Sam, and Zemo all stood when he burst through the doors, all silently conglomerating to one side of the room. Walker had the gall to threaten Sam, and it had your fingers twitching on the gun in your thigh holster in rage. Before anything could come of that, the Wakandans Bucky had mentioned showed up, and when Walker tried talking down to them before placing a hand on one's shoulder, melee ensued.

You leaned on the bar with one arm, watching in amusement as Walker got his ass handed to him. Zemo seemed to be in the same boat, observing without expression as he passed you his drink, and you took a couple of sips before returning it.

"We should do something," Sam said to you and Bucky.

"Looking strong, John!"

"Yes, excellent form! Top notch," you added. "Really showing them the prowess of the new Captain America!"

"Bucky…" Sam chided, prompting Bucky to finally intervene. Sam looked to you, and you held your hands up in defense.

"I am not fighting the goddamn Dora Milaje. I don't feel like dying today – especially not for the sake of helping John Walker."

Sam sighed before joining the fight himself, and that was when Zemo’s hand enveloped yours, silently tugging you towards the bathroom. You opened your mouth to say "Is this really the time for a quickie?" but he held a finger to his lips, effectively silencing you. Once he had successfully guided you into the bathroom, he closed the door quietly behind him, and shoved the tub to the side, revealing a secret passageway.

"Come with me," Zemo said simply, and you scoffed.

"I'm not abandoning Sam and Bucky. My place is here."

"Actually, if I remember correctly, your assignment is to keep an eye on me. Although I'd rather not have to, I will overpower you if I must, because I will be leaving now. So, it is technically your job to follow me, and it would behoove you to simply follow your comrades’ orders without an unnecessary scuffle."

The man really didn't miss a beat, did he? Sam and Bucky had, in fact, assigned you to watch Zemo. Although it was implied that that was everyone's task, they had specifically delegated the role to you. So, it was a matter of whether or not you could take Zemo in a fight, and although you secretly hoped he'd go easy on you, you knew that his own self-preservation was his chief concern.

"Fine," you grumbled, not missing the smile on his face as you shoved past him and jumped down into the tunnel.

Your joints ached in protest of your actions, but you ignored it. He was right behind you, not even bothering to cover the passageway back up before taking off in one of the three directions that the tunnel led to. You were right behind him, and it wasn't long before the sounds of the scuffle faded away. Roughly five minutes later, you reached the end, and he pushed aside the manhole above you and climbed out. Zemo took your hands and helped you out as well, before replacing the manhole while you surveyed the area. It was a city street, but they all looked the same in Riga, so you had no idea where you were.

"Come on," Zemo said, lacing his fingers with yours as you ran down the street. He took a few turns and ended up in the town square, where he led you into a hotel. As you entered the lobby, he explained, "We'll stay here for a few hours, essentially hiding in plain sight, to allow the Dora Milaje and Walker time to leave and search for me elsewhere."

You nodded, and as you approached the front desk, Zemo wrapped his arm snugly around your waist, pulling you close to him.

"Do you have any availability for the night?" Zemo inquired, then smiled lovingly at you. "It is our wedding day, and my beautiful bride simply cannot wait until we reach our honeymoon destination to get her hands on me."

You sent Zemo a quick glare, but the man at the desk didn't notice. He chuckled and nodded, saying something about "What a happy couple" as he booked the room for you. Zemo ignored your pointed look and kissed your temple, thanking the man and paying for the room before leading you in the direction of the room. As soon as you were out of earshot of the desk clerk, you glowered at Zemo once again, although his arm remained around your waist until you reached the room. Not that you minded, really.

"'Beautiful bride'? 'Honeymoon'? Really?"

"Yes," Zemo replied calmly, unlocking the door and opening it for you. As you walked past him, he elaborated, "If Walker comes looking for me, he'll be asking for a former SHIELD agent and a criminal. If the gentleman at the desk is convinced we're a happy newlywed couple, he won't even think to mention us to Walker."

It didn't take more than half a second to find his genuine answer in his mind. "How smoothly and effortlessly you lie, Zemo. You simply wanted to touch me again, so you came up with a convenient excuse."

Zemo licked his lips subtly, before shrugging with a small smile, wordlessly saying 'you got me there.'

"We need to get back to Sam and Bucky once Walker and the Dora Milaje are gone, but there's no foolproof way to go about it," you began pacing the room, as Zemo remained fixed beside the wall. "If I text Sam or Bucky, Walker will know they got a message, and they're both the worst liars I've ever met. God knows we don't need the Dora having any idea about where you are, you wouldn't last a full minute before they drove a spear through your chest. We also can't wait around too long, because then Sam and Bucky might leave Riga, and —"

You were still pacing and mid-sentence when Zemo suddenly grabbed you by the back of your neck and pulled you into a searing kiss, effectively silencing you. His other hand rested on the curve of your waist, pulling you against his chest. The surprise of the act and subsequent warm feeling in your stomach absolutely obliterated all other thoughts from your mind, and all you could focus on was him.

At some point, you regained your senses, albeit still in a haze. You pressed your palms to his shoulders and shoved him a few inches back, and he stared down at you with half-lidded eyes and lust-blown pupils.

“We – we need to focus on Sam and Bucky,” you managed to stammer out, but Zemo simply cupped your cheek and stroked the side of your face with his thumb.

“Is that truly what you want to be focusing on, Schatz?” Zemo inquired, his voice low, taking on even more of a gravely tone than usual. It flooded your veins with heat and desire, and you found your eyes fluttering closed as he bent down to pepper your neck with kisses. “Or would you rather simply wait out Walker and the Dora Milaje here, with me? Allowing me to touch you, taste you, in all the ways I know you crave?”

The final shred of your sanity left the building when he gently bit down on your neck, at the point where it met your shoulder, and you found yourself releasing a breathy moan and melting into his touch. Zemo wasted no time in kissing you once again, lips fast and insistent on yours, one hand on the small of your back, pressing you against him, and the other on the nape of your neck once again. His body leaned into yours as he kissed you with fervor, and your hands longingly grasped the front of his sweater. Eventually, Zemo abruptly spun you around to press your back against the wall that had previously been behind him, and he hiked one of your legs up onto his hip, gripping it under your thigh. His other hand slowly moved from the back of your neck to the front, fingers curling deliciously around your throat as he applied a little pressure, earning another airy moan from you.

As if on reflex, his hips bucked up into you, and the friction left you mewling. Just like last time, it seemed to be your noises that set Zemo off, as he released a low growl from the back of his throat and dropped your leg to tear your shirt off while you took the hint and kicked off your shoes. He undid the fasten on your jeans with lightning speed, and yanked them – along with your panties – down past your hips so you could kick them both off. Next went your bra, which was flung god knows where in the room, and Zemo took a small step back to admire you.

It only lasted for a split second, because you then grabbed the straps he wore around his shoulders and used them to pull him in and kiss him again. Zemo’s hands glided slowly, sensually down your shoulders, your back, then came to rest upon your ass, grabbing it fiercely with both hands. His hands trailed further down, to the undersides of your thighs, before he lifted you with surprising ease and carried you over to the bed at the center of the room. Zemo threw you down onto the mattress unceremoniously, gaze locked on your chest as he watched your breasts bounce from the force, but you were quick to sit upright and pull him back in by the shoulder straps. You removed them then, as well as his turtleneck and belt buckle, and he was cooperative in removing his own boots and slacks, leaving him in his black briefs, his cock tenting the fabric there.

When you reached out to remove his briefs, Zemo pushed you to lay down by your shoulder, and knelt down at the edge of the bed, opening your legs at the knee with a harsh grip. You didn’t even have time to blink before he dove in, licking a long stripe up your slit before moving to your clit as your head fell back onto the mattress and your eyes fluttered closed. He focused primarily on your clit, occasionally lapping at your folds, but always returning his attention to that bundle of nerves. Gasps and moans were already falling for your lips, but when his middle finger and ring finger entered the fray, you found yourself crying out his name and tangling your fingers in his hair.

That delectable little growl of his escaped him once more, and you felt the vibrations of it against you, which warranted another moan, and Zemo’s fingers began delving in and out of your core at a steadfast pace. When he began curling them upwards, rubbing them against that sweet spot deep inside you, you were a goner. He wanted more of your beautiful sounds of pleasure, wanted to see you become more and more undone for him. You only lasted a couple minutes longer, growing progressively louder and more unhinged with each passing second. You were then launched over the edge, one hand tugging on his chestnut tresses and the other gripping the comforter of the bed, crying out his name amongst various explicatives.

When your eyes opened again, Zemo was standing, kicking off his boxers as he made eye contact with you while he sucked his fingers clean of you. He had set his wallet on the bedside table in the midst of your pacing, so he retrieved it and pulled a condom from one of the compartments. You sat up and snatched it from him, quickly tearing it open and rolling it down over his length. The sensation caused a sigh to leave his lips, before murmuring, "Eager, are we, Kätzchen?"

Electing to ignore him, you grabbed his hand and pulled him onto the bed with you, wordlessly instructing him to lay down by pressing your hands on his chest. Zemo got the message with ease, happily complying as you straddled him. The sight of you sinking down on his clock, your palms flat against his chest to steady yourself, caused him to groan in pleasure. Far too eager to spend an abundant amount of time adjusting to him, you began moving, rocking your hips back and forth at a resolute pace, savoring the feeling of him sliding in and out of you. Zemo's hands rested on your waist, fingertips digging into your skin as he helped you keep your rhythm, while he gazed up at you as if you were a goddess in the flesh, his jaw hanging open slightly and hair disheveled.

By the time you were approaching your second orgasm, Zemo could tell, from the faltering of your hips as they strove to increase their speed, and from the way your nails raked down his chest each time you used his length inside you to hit that special spot there. He began thrusting up into you, eager to feel you come on his cock. You unintentionally caught a passing glance at his thoughts, and learned that it seemed that he always wanted more of you, needed more of you, to the point that he questioned if you had toyed with his mind somehow. You were about to inform him that no, you had not done anything to his mind, when he trusted particularly hard and deep up into you and his fingertips dug deliciously hard into your hips at the same time, and all sensual thoughts left your mind as you met your release a second time.

Still shaking slightly and moaning breathlessly, Zemo flipped you over onto your back, lifted your calf up onto his hip and held it there, and began pistoning in and out of you at a desperate, unforgiving pace. When your eyes fluttered open, you found that he was practically snarling above you, teeth bared in concentration and an intense fire in his eyes. It reminded you that his softness toward you did not change the fact that he was a criminal mastermind and former kill squad leader, who had done a great many terrible things. Yet the thought only made you want him even more, wrapping an arm around his neck to pull him into a heated, haphazard kiss.

Zemo thrust in and out of you like a man on a mission, the sound of his pelvis colliding with yours filling the room, before he pulled out of you long enough to flip you onto your chest, face in the pillows and ass in the air, then resumed his pace. The new angle felt incredible, and it didn't take long before you were moaning into the pillows, fists clenched around the duvet. In the blink of an eye, Zemo grabbed a fistful of your hair and yanked you upright, your back flush against his chest.

"Do not hide your beautiful noises from me, Liebling. I want to hear you," Zemo commanded, and you moaned in response, both as a confirmation of his words and as a natural reaction to the low, gravely tone his voice took on. His hand moved to encase your neck, tilting your head back even further so he could trail open-mouthed kisses down your neck, before biting down on your shoulder, earning a shuddering gasp from you. "Now tell me, Kätzchen: who makes you feel this good?"

"You," you choked out, groaning in pleasure when his fingers tightened their grip on your throat.

"Me, what?"

"You, Baron," you corrected, and Zemo hummed in approval, kissing you quickly in praise. He gave your neck another squeeze before throwing you back down onto the mattress, his hands on your hips as he returned his focus to fucking the very soul out of you.

As his hips began to stutter into yours and soft moans began falling from his lips, signaling he was approaching his end, Zemo reached around your body to begin expertly rubbing your clit, desperate for you to finish in unison. The way your walls fluttered around him let him know that he was on the right track, so he quickened the pace of his fingers on your clit, careful to maintain the angle he was thrusting at. As you fell apart beneath him a third and final time, your scream of "Baron!" and your core clenching around him like the most luxurious vice, Zemo found himself crying out your name in accompaniment with a low, guttural moan, spilling himself into the condom.

Zemo didn't move for a moment, hands still clutching your hips, albeit with a looser grip now, as he fought to catch his breath. Still panting, he slowly removed himself from you, falling into a sweaty heap beside you. Breathing heavily yourself, you leaned over to kiss him – far slower this time, both of you reveling in post-coitus bliss. He affectionately brushed your hair away from your face, as it had been stuck to your forehead from perspiration, before stroking your cheek with his thumb.

A brief eternity later, Zemo stood and headed to the restroom, no doubt disposing of the condom, before returning in one of the hotel’s white bathrobes and holding a cold rag. He flopped down onto the mattress, placing the towel over his forehead and eyes as he had earlier in his flat.

“Apologies, Schatz. As enjoyable as that was, it certainly did not help my migraine,” Zemo explained, blindly reaching out to grab your hand and bring it to his lips, placing a kiss on your knuckles.

You murmured a dismissive ‘you’re fine’ before heading to the washroom yourself, hopping into the shower and allowing the burning temperature of the water to ease the ache in practically all your muscles – some of it from fighting, some of it from fucking – although you suspected that the ache in your thighs, from being so tense throughout the multiple orgasms, wasn’t going away anytime soon. Thankfully, Zemo truly had done a marvelous job on your stitches, and the wound was already healing up nicely. By the time you finished your shower, the steam had clouded the room and coated the mirrors with condensation, but you felt more relaxed than you had in days. Donning a bathrobe yourself, you exited the bathroom, and situated yourself in the chair beside the floor-to-ceiling window on the wall of the room. Zemo was snoring softly, and the quiet tranquility of the room and the comfort of your seat sent you into a cat nap of your own, your head falling back against the chair as you slipped into unconsciousness.

You were entirely unsure how long you had slept, but when you awoke, Zemo was sitting with his back resting against the headboard, reading a random book he’d found in the room’s nightstand. He looked up at you long enough to flash you a small smile, before returning to the book. You yawned and rubbed your eyes, then sat up straighter in the chair and gazed out the window beside you. You hadn’t noticed, but the room had a lovely view of the town square.

A few minutes after you began observing the city below, your eyebrows practically shot up into your hairline as you saw none other than the bastard himself, John Walker, chasing one of the Flag Smashers before hitting him with the shield, sending the man flying into the statue at the center of the square. Each member of the bustling crowd stopped dead in their tracks, watching the scene unfold before them, as this new Captain America placed his foot on the man’s chest, pinning him against the stairs of the statue, as the man screamed, “It wasn’t me!”

The chair you were sitting in clattered to the floor as you stood bolt upright, a shuddering gasp escaping you and your hand flying to your mouth as you watched Walker raise the shield high above his head, a completely unhinged look upon his face. Zemo was at your side in an instant, his hands on your upper arms as he stood behind you, a worried expression on his face, wondering what could have caused you such distress. Before he had the chance to ask, Zemo’s eye caught the scene below, and you both watched in shock and horror as John Walker drove the shield into the Flag Smasher’s chest, again and again and again, until the man just laid there – bloodied, bludgeoned, and unmoving. Dead, at the hands of the new Captain America.

—————

@henrysmorgan @clints-lucky-arrow @therenlover

600 notes · View notes

katsidhe · 3 years

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Top five excruciatingly awkward "so close, yet so far" moments of Sam & Cas communicating.

6. 5.22: "Take care of these guys, okay?”/ “That's not possible.”/”Then humor me.”/ “Oh. I was supposed to lie. Uh... Sure. They'll be fine.”

the s5 awkwards! Awww. I just love how Cas is giving Sam the closest thing he can to the truth, and then only belatedly realizes that Sam wanted a false comfort. It’s also strangely sweet that Sam asked Cas for a kind lie, too.

Incidentally, this makes a fine contrast to the season’s worth of lies Cas will be treating Sam to in s6.

5. 7.21 “You seem troubled. Of course, that's a primary aspect of your personality, so I sometimes ignore it.” and “I was lost until I took on your pain.”

This interaction is really fascinating. Dean is treating Cas with mostly frustration and disgust in late s7; he doesn’t want to pity Cas, he wants to hate him. Sam, on the other hand, has a horrified compassion for how badly a problem that was Sam’s has now hurt Cas.

This conversation acknowledges that Cas is generally aware of Sam’s various struggles, and that he looks to Sam for cues on how to react. Cas has a tendency to accommodate Dean’s moods/bouts of suffering in a way he doesn’t necessarily do for Sam, and I’d argue this line hints at why--Cas buys in to Sam’s own minimizations.

As for “I was lost until I took on your pain:” that sure is... some kind of thing to say to someone! In one sense, Cas is saying something to the effect of, “You suffered horrific trauma to the point of mental collapse and near-death, and I’ve found the experience to be really quite cathartic.” But of course he doesn’t mean anything quite so tone-deaf, and Sam doesn’t take it that way either. Cas is trying to reassure Sam, not minimize. Mostly, Cas is echoing a sentiment that Sam himself expressed earlier in s7: that suffering has helped to focus and alleviate his terrible guilt. That’s definitely something Sam can get behind.

But there isn’t an apology here, either. Cas apologized to Sam in 7.17, when he wasn’t lucid, and in his altered state post-7.17, he presents "Sorry” to Dean, and expresses regret to Sam about the lives and souls he took, but doesn’t specifically bring up the wall. Not that Sam minds. Sam tells Cas he knows Cas’s intentions were good, and that he’s grateful. On top of this, Sam is speaking to Cas as an invalid: as someone who needs his support to get better, even though Cas doesn’t agree.

4. 11.14: “You chose this? You have to fight, Cas! Eject him, now!”/ “...We need him!”

I was on the fence about whether this truly counts as a SamCas miscommunication--but I think, especially in the fuller context of Cas’s choice in s11, it really does. Sam at first couldn’t imagine that Cas would say yes to Lucifer, especially given the circumstances of 11.09/10: Sam thinks Cas shares with him the priority of keeping Lucifer locked away at the cost of all else, up to and including the Darkness. This, it turns out, is not the case.

The degree to which Cas thinks of this kind of compartmentalization and self-sacrifice as something that comes from Sam, that Sam approves of, or as something innate to Cas that he and Sam share, is really interesting to me. I don’t think Cas considers saying yes to Lucifer to be a personal betrayal of Sam at all, in a way he absolutely would had it instead been Dean in Sam’s shoes. That doesn’t mean Cas wouldn’t still go ahead with it. But Cas wouldn’t expect Dean to brush it off the way he seems to expect of Sam.

The doctrine of self-negation specifically in the service of a larger cause is something that Cas shares with Sam but categorically not with Dean. Cas knows exactly what Dean thinks about allying with enemies: it’s a betrayal. In fact, Dean straight up refuses to accept that Cas did this of his own volition for most of s11, whereas Sam does.

[as a side note, this feeds my fascination with at which points in his personal arc Cas would be totally on Sam’s side in s4. If s6 Cas was around for Sam’s s4 arc, it’s easy to imagine him taking Sam’s side over Dean’s. but Cas is a consequentialist, too: the outcomes of s4 and s6 were so catastrophic that Cas loses this sense of belief in the power of his ideals.]

And for as strenuously as Sam tries to not take Cas’s actions here as a personal betrayal--in line with how he tends to treat other betrayals--how on earth can he not? How on earth can he not feel devastated that Cas, the only other person in the universe with firsthand knowledge of exactly how badly Lucifer messed him up and what Sam suffered to cage him, and his closest friend to boot, set Lucifer free and gave him the keys to Sam’s home without so much as a warning? How can he not take it personally that he begs Cas to eject Lucifer *while Lucifer’s in the active process of trying to hurt him* and Cas refuses? there really is only one conclusion: that Cas assessed the cost to Sam and the weight of his trauma and what Sam paid to lock Lucifer away, and decided that it was not enough. and even if Sam agrees with him, objectively speaking, DAMN does that sting.

3. 6.12: “Look, I-I would hug you, but—”/“—that would be awkward.”

oh lord. Oh geez. s6 as a whole belongs in the awful communication category: Cas is avoiding Sam even while he’s going to extreme lengths to protect him. in this scene, Cas is hiding the facts that a) he harrowed the Cage to attempt to save Sam, b) he botched the job so badly that Sam’s soul was left behind, c) he’s been keeping this a secret from Sam and Dean for a year and a half, d) Sam has been soulless for a year, e) Sam’s repressed memories of soullessness and the Cage are potentially accessible to him, but would cause him acute suffering, f) Cas is in the middle of fighting a shadow war in which he’s allied with Crowley. This accumulated shame and desperation will culminate in Cas tearing down Sam’s wall.

Meanwhile, Sam’s most recent memory of Cas is Lucifer turning him into chunky ketchup. In fact, he’s still in the s5 mindset in general: he hasn’t had a year to come to terms with any of this. Why does he back away here? There are tons and tons and tons of potential reasons to speculate about, but no matter what, it is inarguably discomfort centered on Cas specifically. And so Sam turns down Cas’s physical overture of support.

2. 13.21: "Look, Sam, I was used by Lucifer, too. It was the worst possible violation. So I’m not taking your reluctance lightly, but he is already out there, and we’ve been ignoring it and avoiding dealing with him because we’re afraid. We let Lucifer out of the Cage, and he has never stopped being our responsibility.”

yet more Hashtag Lucifersplaining. This is such a fucking weird thing for Cas to say to Sam, especially in the s11 context that I just went into?? I don’t doubt that Cas felt used and violated by Lucifer in s11, and Sam certainly wouldn’t challenge that either, but to compare their experiences is just... insane, honestly, and on some level Sam knows it’s insane.

But I think the more salient comparison that Cas is reaching for is still s4-s5: he’s appealing to Sam’s still-present sense of culpability about Lucifer that originates from way back then. And while certainly Cas is single-handedly and clear-sightedly responsible for releasing Lucifer in s11 in a way Sam definitely wasn’t in s4, their situations in s5 and s11 are at least in the realm of being analogous: they both said yes willingly to accomplish a goal, and they both had to suffer Lucifer hurting their loved ones as a consequence. Cas, much like in 9.11, is trying to reassure Sam that he understands that particular burden of guilt and that horrible lack of control. That’s the fear and guilt that Cas feels.

But here’s another facet of this miscommunication: I don’t think that the clear guilt Sam shows in reaction to Cas’s words here is actually rooted in the s4-s5 era at all, or even in s11. Sam locked Lucifer away in s5; Sam was the one who begged Cas to get rid of Lucifer in s11; Sam was the one willing to suffer rather than say yes himself--Sam isn’t culpable for any of that, and I do think this is one area where he is in fact very aware of it. Instead, Sam feels guilty for more of less exactly what Cas is accusing him of: not dealing with him decisively in s12 or s13. In 12.23, Sam got rid of Lucifer by locking him away with Mary, which fucking harrows him in s13. Then, Jack gets trapped in there too. When Lucifer returns to their universe, Sam’s stuck in a horrific limbo where he’s got no real tool suitable to deal with Lucifer, but he knows he desperately needs to. When Cas accuses him of not taking action because he’s afraid, Sam is acutely aware that Cas is absolutely right.

1. 9.11: “Nothing is worth losing you. You know, being human, it didn't just change my view of food. It changed my view of you. I mean, I can relate now to how you feel... The only person who has screwed things up more consistently than you...is me. And now I know what that guilt feels like. And I know what it means to feel sorry, Sam. I am sorry.”

No SamCas list is complete without 9.11! :D This really is the crowning jewel of Cas trying to be reassuring and kind, missing the mark by a mile by any reasonable standards, and Sam accepting it positively anyway.

9.11 has a kind of uniquely amazing timing because it’s smack dab in the middle of the Gadreel arc, wherein Sam is trying to prioritize his sense of being wronged over his guilt and Dean’s hurt feelings. It’s one of the worst times in canon for Sam to get the message “you always screw things up.” And yet it’s one of the best times for Sam to get the message “you have intrinsic value [even when apart from Dean]. I care about your life more than your utility.”

I can easily accept that humanity gave Cas a healthier perspective on the innate value of human life, especially of the non-Winchester variety. but it’s interesting that Cas categorizes “being human” as the thing that changed his perspective on mistakes and guilt: I would say without a doubt that his biggest changes in that respect came far earlier, in s6-8, which are arcs focused almost entirely on Cas’s sense of guilt and personal screw-ups. It’s for this reason that I don’t think Cas is actually meaning to reference what Sam thinks of as his cosmic mistakes (eg s4, s8): I think he’s referencing a more mundane, everyday type of guilt--the powerlessness to fix small messes, the background radiation of feeling like a failure, like every tiny thing goes wrong because, innately, you can never measure up. For both Cas and Sam, a lot of this sense of inevitable failure revolves around the impossibility of meeting Dean’s standards. But Cas has also just had a period of time apart from those standards, failing on different interpersonal levels (even if everything ends up getting related back to Dean in the end).

Cas chose to stay with Sam after the events of 9.10 rather than accompany Dean. Cas is choosing now to apologize to Sam, directly, to try to ease his pain, and to prevent him from harming himself. And yet it’s couched in terms directly acknowledging Sam’s sense of failure and wrongness as factual. Maybe Cas’s outreach was more effective because of this. Maybe it wasn’t. But it’s a far cry from where they’ll get to by 15.17: “I think your internal compass is functioning perfectly.”

#5.22 #7.21 #11.14 #13.21 #6.12 #9.11 #sam and cas #sastiel #:)#just because #sam and dean #dean and cas #whoops this got long #ask game

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urimaginespimp · 3 years

Text

How You Get The Girl (This Love Final Part)

Bucky x Reader (elemental witch)

Set on TFATWS last episode

Note: Thank you to everyone that's tuned in, gave feedbacks, and liked/reblogged. I had to so much fun writing these! After this I’ll be working on oneshots completely unrelated to this story of several prompts.

We got a new Cap!

Previous Part: Untouchable

Marvel Masterlist

--------

“I’m serious, Shuri. I am over him.” you groaned as Shuri won’t wipe off the smug, disbelieving look on her face.

“Sure, Jan.” She replied getting up to continue on what’s she’s working on.

“Hey, I know that reference!”

“I’m just saying... Seven years of pinning over the guy – which five of it was when he was practically dead, by the way – and you’re telling me it took one confrontation for you to get over him.” She shrugged.

Some of the Dora Milaje were also in the lab, and you haven’t been vocal about it, but you didn’t miss the knowing looks they’ve been exchanging every time Bucky was brought in the conversation.

“Well, it would really be nice if you’re being supportive right now.” you sulked in your seat. Yeah, who were you kidding. Maybe you’re not completely, completely over him, but now you’re sorting to the fake it ‘til you make it method and so far, you’re doing well.

“Okay, fine. Want me to set you up with someone? My brother has some contacts around the world and I think with some buttering up he’d consider setting you up to bachelor royalties.” She wiggled her brows at you.

“May I suggest the Prince of Brunei? The internet says he’s looking for a wife.” One of the ladies snickered, making the others hum in approval.

“T’Challa knows him?” this piqued your interest. “He’s pretty hot.”

“Well make up your mind. It’ll take me a few business days of persuading my brother.” She raised her brows at you.

“It wouldn’t hurt to start dating. I’ll think about it first.” you muttered, missing how Shuri winked at the other ladies in the room. Ayo had told her in private about Bucky’s little confession to Zemo, and the princess has a few tricks up her sleeve to speed up the matchmaking process.

“I’m only staying for a few days more. It’s been a few weeks and Val’s been complaining from lack of sleep.” She’s been taking over your nightly escapades, and it’s starting to irritate her to be surrounded with so much booze but not being able to indulge.

Just then, Okoye enters the lab. “Check the news. There’s a live coverage of a hostage in New York. Sam and White Wolf are on it.”

--------

Bucky was looking over proudly as Sam was talking to the Senator.

Seeing Sam now walking over to him, he straightened up and cleared his throat. “Sorry, I uh was texting and all I heard was um a black guy in stars and stripes.”

They both chuckled, now walking side by side. “Nice job, Cap.”

“Thanks.”

--------

He’s done it. He told Yori the truth. Though now that might have been the end of their friendship, he knew the old man deserves the closure for his son.

Now back in his apartment, he took the notebook Steve once owned from his pocket, and opened it to the page where his list is. Looking over it, he saw that the only name left uncrossed is yours.

Just then, his phone pinged twice. One message was from Sam, and the other one from Shuri.

Sam’s read:

I wasn’t kidding when I told you

back on the boat that I’d get the

younger ones here to give you a

crash course on romance.

Check your email.

He rolled his eyes and opened the one from Shuri.

Y/N’s explained everything to us.

We saw you save those people,

White Wolf. Wakand is proud of you.

Brother says you’re welcome to

visit anytime. Take care!

p.s.

It’s good to know Y/N and you are

are on good terms. It finally allowed me

to set her up with one of the princes

mother’s been pestering me about. One less

off of mother’s list for me.

“Damn it, Shuri.” he groaned, reading the last part over and over again. He had to move fast. Heading over to his email, he opened the one from Sam.

The subject says:

21st century romance for reformed dummies.

There was an attached 60-second video. Clicking on it, he chuckled when Sam’s voice started booming behind the camera, where it showed two young girls and one boy, all around below 10 years of age.

“Okay, I gathered you here today because a cyborg friend of mine is need of help. I already filled you in the details necessary earlier, and all you have to do now is give him quick tips. Remember, talk slow.”

The boy on the middle spoke up. “Is she an avenger?”

“Not important, but yes. It’s the one with similar powers to an avatar.” Sam answered, followed by the two girls saying they know which one, and the boy to mutter ‘damn it I always had a crush on her...’

“Okay the first step would obviously be to say sorry.” the girl on the right said directly to the camera.

“Oh! Extra points if you do it standing like a ghost outside her door and it’s about to rain.” the other girl from the left perked up.

“I said he’s a cyborg, not a weatherman.” Sam commented, still behind the camera.

“Say you were afraid to tell her what you want.” the first girl spoke again.

“Six months is a long time to be afraid, man.” the boy in the middle spoke up this time.

“Try years.” Sam muttered.

“Then you say you want her for worse or for better!” The cheery girl exclaimed once again.

“You’ve been playing too many fake weddings, but yes, that could work.” Sam told her, making her beam, showing a missing tooth.

“Tell her you could wait forever and ever.” the boy added.

“I mean he’s already old enough to be your great grandpa but go on I guess.” Sam was snickering, causing the camera to slightly shake.

“Remind her of how it used to be. That is if he was good to her.” the more mature girl was pointing out. “Saying you’ll put her heart back together could also work.” she smiled, and the other one fake swooned on where she was standing.

“She’s right!” she exclaimed, while boy nods and says “that’s how it works.” at the same time.

Now turning the camera, Sam was now in frame.

“And that’s how you get the girl, Barnes. Straight from the local’s experts. Don’t fuck it up.”

And three voices scolded him for saying a bad word as the clip ends.

--------

It didn’t take long for him to take a flight straight to Norway where New Asgard was. This time without the aid of Zemo’s jet, he had to find the means to travel from the airport, while trying to calm his nerves.

As if the universe was on his side, a couple claiming to be heading back to Asgard allowed him to hitch a ride with them.

Now on the backseat, he tried to make small talk.

“So, uh, how are you guys settling in the planet?” he asked.

The lady on the passenger seat turned to face him with a smile. “It wasn’t easy, really. But the princess went out of her way to educate us about life here on Midgard. She’s so good at it, you’d forget she hasn’t even been living here a decade.”

He smiled. They claim you as their princess despite only being adopted by Thor. He recalls how you once rambled about being scared that they’d be indifferent towards you once Thor brings you to Asgard, one of the reasons you’ve been making up excuses to go with him.

“Why, would you look at that. We’re just in time before it starts raining.” The man driving commented.

Peeking through the window, sure enough, the sky was getting darker.

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” he muttered. He might just take the little girl’s advice after all.

After getting out of the couple’s car, he ran straight to where he remembers your home was, just in time when Val just got out of your house.

“Hi. I don’t think we’ve formally met. I’m Bucky.” He greeted extending his ahand to her which she took. A skeptical look on her face.

“Call me Val. I’m sorry what are you doing here?”

“I need to speak to Y/N, please.” He answered truthfully.

“Well it’s about night time so she’s getting dolled up.” She answered

“I know, I know, it’s for her date. But that’s why I’m here.”

Val raised a brow, confused about what date he was getting all bummed about when you were only getting ready to go back to looking out for people out and about at night. But then it dawned to her that maybe this was some of your friend’s doing.

“Y-yes... the date.” She decided to play along, holding back a smirk. Just then, rain started slowly pouring, along with thunder. “Well shit, I have to help some folks get their kids back inside their homes now. You’re free to knock on her door.” She excused herself.

His own clothes were starting to get drenched when he finally knocked on your door.

No answer. He knocked again, louder this time. Now footsteps were heard coming to the door, and the knob turned as you opened it.

“Damn it, Val, the door’s not even lo-” You stopped talking, surprised at the figure that greeted you.

“Bucky... are you insane? Don’t just stand there, come in it’s raining hard.” he urged him to get in and closed the door behind you.

Facing each other, he was taking you in. Val wasn’t lying when she said you were getting ready for your date. He can’t believe he was already getting jealous of a faceless punk.

“So uh... what brings you here?” You decided to break the ice, fidgeting where you stood, still barefoot as it looked like you were gonna have to stay at home if it was going to rain this hard all night.

“Don’t go on the date.” he pleaded, confusing you.

“What?”

“Please don’t go on the date.” He repeated, now walking towards you.

There is no date, but now you were wondering why he’s telling you not to.

“Why?”

“I love you.” he answered without missing a beat, now stepping closer to you. Instead of the reaction he was hoping for, you scoffed and took a step back.

“Don’t pull a Laurie on me.” you replied, a frown etched on your face. He was confused.

“A Laurie?”

“Yeah, I’ve seen enough adaptations of Little Women to know that you’re pulling a Laurie on me.” You spat as a matter of fact. “You’re being really mean, stop it.” you crossed your arms in front of your chest.

“What? I- I haven’t even thought of that reference!” he defends himself, cheeks reddening from embarrassment. “Amy was gonna get married, Y/N.”

“Oh then by all means, feel free to come back just after he proposes.”

“W- We’re getting sidetracked here, doll. I came here hoping there still an ounce of you that loves me. Please don’t tell me you’ve completely moved on from me.”

“What, like it’s hard?” you replied. It surprised you when his brows shot up from recognition of that line.

“Now you’re pulling an Elle Woods on me!” he pointed at you in an accusatory manner.

“Don’t point that finger at me, Barnes. How was I even supposed to know you’ve seen that movie?” you rolled your eyes, walking past him.

“I watched all the movies you told me about back in Wakanda.” he spoke up, making you stop in your tracks to face him again.

“Yeah, that’s right. I watched every movie, I listened to every song, read every book you recommended, and visited every internet site you once said I might like. I was always listening even when I made it seem like I wasn’t.”

You stared at him for a second looking for any indication that he was lying. Recovering from the mild shock, you pursed your lips. “I hope you know the Porn site was a joke. Sam did it to Steve once and I just thought it was hilarious.”

His mouth twitched. Walking over to you once more he stopped when he was only a step away, not breaking eye contact.

“I’m really sorry, Doll. I know it’s bold of me to even ask you, but please give me the chance to make it up to you. And I don’t care if it’s me that has to wait for you this time. Take all the time you need, just please don’t go on that date.”

“Bucky, there was never a date. I have no idea what date you were referring this entire time.” you confessed, making him bring his hands to his face and groan, muttering Damn it, Shuri.

Hearing Shuri’s name, you put two and two together. “Is this about Shuri trying to set me up with a prince?” he nodded as answer. “Well, I did tell her I was gonna think about it.”

He removed his hands away from his face. “Please say no.” He whispered. “I’d tell you what the kids told me what to say if I have to.”

“What kids?”

“Sam got a bunch of kids on video to teach me how to win you back. I’ve already stood under the rain outside your door just like what one of the girls suggested.” Judging from the grin on your face, he was now regretting even mentioning them.

“Well go on, then.” you urged. “Let me see how much you’ve learned.”

“The first time I saw you at the airport, I got so distracted looking at you just casually sitting on top if the ramps while we were preparing to fight. That wink you sent me that day is still engraved in my mind by the way. Then I was so taken back when you bluntly told me you’re attracted to me. I-”

“I don’t think the kids taught you to remind me of my attempts to flirt with you.” You cut him off, embarrassed at the memory. He chuckled at your expression.

“Okay, okay.” he took a deep breath.

“I think I started catching feelings for you the moment they woke me up from my cryosleep and you were there to be the first one to welcome me back. I didn’t think you were still gonna be there like you told me. But you were there, beaming at me like a ray of sunshine. All my years under HYDRA, every time I was woken up, I was only ever treated as an asset. But you welcomed me like I was a friend.” his eyes were starting to get glassy with tears, as he tried not to choke up.

“And then every time you were near, or even when I’d get a whiff of your perfume, I’d start feeling all warm inside and my entire body would be at ease, knowing you were an arm's reach from me. You were the last one I saw as I disintegrated from the blip, and you were the first one I sought out the moment we came back.” he was surprised when you reached forward to wipe away a tear he didn’t even realize had run down his cheek.

“I lied when I said I made a mistake kissing you. It was the first thing I wanted to do the moment I saw you again. But something inside me was always telling me that all I could ever be is someone grateful for your kindness. That it was impossible for the universe to even grant me someone like you after everything I’ve done." He let out a breath before continuing.

"But it was also you, Steve, Sam, and heck – even Zemo– that made me realize that I am worthy of a chance. And I’m sorry it had to take you telling me you were moving on, to have the courage to accept and take the chance that has been long offered to me by the world." He took your hand and gave the back of it a small kiss.

"I love you, Y/N.” Now it was him that had to wipe away your tears away. “Please don’t cry, doll. That wasn’t-”

“Just fucking kiss me already, James.” you laughed, in between sniffles.

He grinned down before you. “You’re my angel with a potty mouth, and I love you.” he whispered, leaning down.

“I love you too."

---------

You and Bucky were out with the Wilsons on their community's afternoon barbeque.

Sarah and you got along with ease, and she was telling you all about their old family business when Bucky hugged you from behind.

"Sorry to interrup, ladies, but I have to show you something Y/N." he said, kissing your cheek.

"Ew, man. I still can't believe your old ass has a girlfriend." Sam commented beside Sarah who was laughing

"You do know I'm older than him, right?" you chuckled.

"I know, but you don't look it." he replied, causing Bucky to flip him off.

Excusing yourself, both of you walked by the docs.

"What's up, old man?" you grinned at him.

"You know what, doll. Most couples would have endearing nicknames for each other."

"I'll call you something sweet once you tell me what that thing you call me when we're alone means."

"What, мое солнце?"

"Yeah, that one! Tell me or else I'll keep calling you ridiculous ones." you threatened, trying not to smile.

"Anyway, мое солнце, I just wanted to show you a text I got from Shuri."

I am yet to have any news that you

manned up and told Y/N you love her,

White Wolf. I was joking before, but now

I really might set her up on a date.

You both chuckled at Shuri's threat.

"I got this." you pulled your phone out of your pocket and dialled her number. You placed it on loud speaker once she picked up.

"Y/N! So nice of you to call."

"Hey, Shuri! Listen..." you feigned seriousness in your voice before releasing a deep breath. "I'm finally over Mr. Smokey eye. I think I'm ready to go on that date now." Bucky was playfully glaring at you for the nickname.

There was dead silence from the other side of the line for a second. "Oh! About that... uh turns out he already has a girlfriend. Planning to propose soon, I heard. Oops!"

"Well that's a bummer. How about the other bachelor royalties your family's friends with? I recently found an article with a list. I can send you one right now. Preferably ones that don't look much like blue-eyed grandpa." you grinned at him as he rolled his eyes. He knows what you were trying to get him to do.

"Uh... turns out my brother isn't that friendly after all." She let out an awkward laugh. "Hasn't Barnes contact you at all?" you could hear the frustration in her voice.

"Oh, that discount prophet, I haven-"

"It means my sun." He finally caved, rolling his eyes.

"What?" you asked him, immidiately forgetting that Shuri was still on.

"WHAT?" she screamed through the phone after a second.

"мое солнце means my sun." he grinned at you.

"Is that Barnes with you?! Hellooo?!!!"

"Talk to you later, princess." you turned off the call when she was about to protest. Facing him again, you stepped closer and put your arms around his shoulders, both of you sharing a grin.

"I love you, мое солнце."

"I love you too, minn stjarna."

"You gonna tell me what that means?"

"You wish."

fin.

--------

@eternalharry @iheartsebandchris @lizzarooni @the-ayo-lit @tanyaherondale @knowyourworth-sellyoursoul @eliwinchester-barnes @ebxny27 @just-a-littlebit-of-everything @fadingdreamersportsmaker @drama-queen-aa

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homoose · 3 years

Text

Love Has a Learning Curve: Part VII (x reader)

Summary: Reader tries to make things right, with a little push from her mama.

Pairing: Spencer Reid x fem!reader

Category: hurt/comfort

Warnings/Includes: none

a/n: I know, I know— please just let our babies be happy ♥️ and so it was. Also, big ups to my tumblr gf @idmakeitbehave for being my beta the past two chapters.

Series Masterlist

———

One week.

That’s how long it had been since their argument. Spencer had driven back to his apartment in silence, absolutely stunned by the way things had blown up.

They’d gotten back from the case in Utah on the fifth of January, and he’d driven straight to Y/N’s, ready to give her a belated New Year’s kiss. Immediately upon entering her apartment, he knew something was wrong. Her hug was stiff, her kiss brief, her eye contact minimal. He’d spent the night, but they barely touched, and she left early for work without waking him. He’d let himself out and texted her later in the day to invite her over for dinner.

Dinner hadn’t been any less awkward, and when he felt awkward, he knew it was bad. He finally couldn’t ignore it any longer, and he’d called it out. He had expected some resistance, but he hadn’t expected that. Y/N never spoke to him with any malice at all, even when he was actually doing something that irritated her. She was the queen of healthy communication. So for her to speak to him like that meant that the underlying issue was much, much worse than he’d originally thought.

He’d gone over their conversations a thousand times, looking desperately for the moment that it went wrong. After some deep consideration, he was certain that something had happened on New Year’s Eve. He just wasn’t sure what. Y/N was insistent that she wasn’t bothered by the declined call, but he still wished he could go back in time and answer it. He was pretty sure the seeds of their argument had sprouted in that moment, regardless of what she said.

Spencer knew she was a creature of habit, and that sometimes she needed space to process and experience her emotions. And if he was being honest, he needed some space after the argument, too. But usually she would have at least texted him by now.

He sighed and set down his newspaper, realizing he’d read the same page four times and hadn’t retained any of it. It was Friday, and he knew she was working. But still his fingers itched to dial her number. He picked up the phone, pressing a key to light up the screen yet again.

No new messages.

He dropped the phone back to the table with a little more force than was necessary. He decided he’d give her the rest of the weekend. If he didn’t hear from her by Sunday, he’d have to do something.

…

Y/N dropped her bag on the floor inside the door and turned to lock the deadbolt. She had managed to sneak out of the building without being stopped by Anita, and she thanked the universe for small miracles.

She didn’t want to have to explain herself. She didn’t want anyone to know what an absolute troll she’d been. Considering that Sam and Spencer had practically become attached at the hip since they’d started hanging out more, Anita was bound to ask about him.

She showered and ordered Thai food, snuggling down on the couch to watch a movie with Roald. She settled on Dumplin’— a favorite for the body positivity, the southern drawls, and the Dolly Parton drag.

And then she came to the argument outside of Harpy’s and lost what little emotional stability she had left.

“Never took you for the type that cares much what people think.”

“I can’t, Bo. And that might make me a coward, but—”

“It does. Willowdean Dixon, I think you’re beautiful. To hell with anyone who’s ever made you feel less than that.”

She didn’t realize she was crying until Roald meowed in distress. She choked out a sob and stroked over his ears, closing her eyes in defeat. “I really fucked this up, huh?”

It had only been one week, but it felt like years since Spencer walked out of her apartment. She’d stayed in bed for the entire weekend, crying on and off. She knew she had no one to blame but herself. Owen had knocked over the first domino, but she’d done nothing to stop the rest from falling.

Spencer had done everything right. He’d done everything she asked, and she’d thrown it all back in his face. He had made the comparison to Mitchell Park, and he was absolutely right. She’d done the exact same thing, only she had almost a year’s worth of ammunition, and she cut a hell of a lot deeper.

Roald nuzzled against her, but she nudged him away— she didn’t even deserve the comfort. Instead, she fumbled in the couch cushions for her phone, swiping open the screen and tapping her favorites list, thumb hovering over Spencer’s name. Then she tapped on the name right above it and blew out a breath.

The line connected and rang three times before she picked up. “Hey, sugar! Your ears must be ringin’, ‘cause I was just thinkin’ about callin’ you.”

“Hey, mama,” Y/N breathed.

Her mother’s tone changed from chipper to concerned in an instant. “What’s wrong, baby?”

She leaned forward to the coffee table to grab Spencer’s scarf— somehow left behind in her apartment— rubbing it between her fingers. “I— I really messed up.”

“Oh, Lord. You need bail money?”

Despite herself, Y/N laughed wetly. “Oh my god , mama. No, I don’t need bail money.”

“Well, if you made bail it can’t be that bad,” Rose insisted.

“I didn’t— I’m not in jail, for Christ’s sake.” Y/N ran a hand over her face. “I messed things up with Spencer.”

“Well, we can fix that,” Rose responded matter of factly. “What happened?”

“We were fighting, and I said some really, really awful things,” Y/N admitted, tears spilling over her lash line.

Rose scoffed. “Honey, I say awful things to your father all the time, and we’ve been married almost 40 years.”

Y/N heaved a long sigh. “Not like this, mama.”

Her mother hummed in consideration. “Well, what were y’all fightin’ about?”

“It’s complicated,” Y/N hedged, toying with the fringe of the scarf.

Rose clicked her tongue. “Do ya want my help or not?”

Y/N dropped her head back against the couch. “I ran into Owen on New Year’s Eve—”

“Well, I hope you told him to stick it where the sun don’t shine,” Rose practically growled.

Y/N closed her eyes as the tears tracked hot down her cheeks. “I didn’t. I— I let him get under my skin, and then I didn’t want to tell Spencer about it because it’s embarrassing, but he knew something was wrong, and he wouldn’t stop asking about it.” She had to pause and suck in a hiccuping breath, releasing it on a sob. “So I yelled at him and said all kinds of terrible things, and then he left, and now I think maybe we broke up, and I’ve literally never been so sad in my whole life.”

There was a long pause on the other end of the phone, and then she heard Rose sniffling. “Really shoulda had your brothers knock the mess out of that son of bitch when we had the chance. He's been gone five years, and he’s still hurtin’ you every chance he gets.”

Y/N swiped uselessly at the tear tracks on her cheeks, sniffling pathetically. “And now I hurt the person who’s spent the last year singlehandedly undoing all of his awful handiwork.”

“Oh, sweetheart,” Rose cooed. Y/N could hear the creak of the floorboards as her mother walked through her childhood home. “You said he knew somethin’ was wrong, right? I can almost guarantee that he’s still just wonderin’ what’s goin’ on. I know he’s supposed to be a genius, but he’s still a man. And men are dumb, sugar. You gotta spell it out for ‘em. Have you talked to him since?”

“No.” Fresh tears spilled over Y/N’s lashes as the thoughts that had kept her from calling him spilled out of her mouth. “What if it was too far? What if I ruined everything? What if he never wants to speak to me again?”

Ross heaved out a long breath. “That’s a lot of what ifs, Y/N.”

“What if I’m right?” she whispered.

“And what if you’re not?” Rose countered. “That boy loves you. Anyone could see that, clear as day. He’d do just about anything for you.” Rose paused, and Y/N heard the springs of the bed squeak as she sat. “But you gotta let him, sweetheart. Right now you’re takin’ away his chance to do that. You’re makin’ the decision for him.”

Y/N listened as her mother’s advice crackled over the line, and for the first time in a week, she felt a tiny sliver of hope.

“If he doesn’t want to be with you anymore, you need to let him tell you that. Don’t settle for a what if. Find out for sure, or you're gonna spend the rest of your life worryin’ and wonderin’, sugar.”

…

That evening found Spencer in his usual spot on the couch, reclined against the arm with a book in hand. He’d promised himself he’d give Y/N the weekend to herself— that he’d let her come to him. That didn’t stop him from checking his phone obsessively; it never buzzed with any new calls or messages, but he still looked every seven minutes.

The sound of the buzzer jolted his body to attention. He checked his watch and drew his brows together before closing his book and scrambling to cross to the intercom, a tiny seed of hope beginning to germinate. He pressed the button to talk, calling, “Yes?” into the speaker box and then listening for the response.

“Hi.”

Her voice was so quiet that he could barely hear it over the crackle of the speaker. He buzzed her in without hesitation, crossing to the door and opening it immediately. She made her way slowly up the stairs, turning at the top of the landing and pausing.

His heart broke at the sight of her. She looked utterly exhausted, dressed in black sweatpants and a soft purple sweater, a black puffer jacket over top. She was holding his scarf, wringing it in between her hands. Her eyes were ringed red, and the bags under them were worse than his.

He watched as she crossed the landing, coming to stand quietly in front of him. He’d known something was wrong, but the way she looked now made him wonder just how long she’d been battling whatever private demons she wouldn’t let him in on.

“I, um.” She cleared her throat, and it was clear she’d been crying from the thickness of her voice. “I have a lot to say— again. But since I was such an asshole, I wanted to give you the opportunity to say anything you need to say first.”

He’d imagined this conversation countless times over the last week, and never once had he thought it would start like this. “Um. Well. You— you really hurt me.”

She could barely look at him. “I know.”

He swallowed. “Please don’t do that again.”

She shook her head, finally meeting his eyes. “I won’t. I won’t ever again.”

Spencer tucked his hands into the pockets of his lounge pants. “I know I may not be the best at social cues, but I’m a pretty good profiler. And I can tell when something’s wrong.” He raised his eyebrows. “You don’t have to tell me everything. I’m just asking you to tell me when I do something that makes you upset.”

“You— you didn’t do anything wrong. I—” He watched her squeeze her eyes shut. “God, I’m so sorry, Spencer. I’m just— I’m sorry for so many things. For lying about being fine, for being up on my high horse about communicating and then not actually doing it, for being an absolute bitch.”

He wanted to argue— she wasn’t a bitch— but he could tell she was far from done.

“I— I thought therapy was supposed to teach me how to talk about things, but this still feels… impossible to say out loud,” she admitted, fingers fumbling with the fabric of the scarf. “It’s embarrassing and ridiculous. But I— I have deep-seated insecurities. That I’m not really that smart or interesting or particularly special.”

He thought back to that night in Mitchell Park and felt the guilt all over again. He’d practically said those exact words to her— it was no wonder she was feeling this way.

“And every person that I’ve ever been with has— really reinforced those ideas, so for a long time they were just… a set part of my self-image,” she explained, dragging a hand over her messy hair. “I thought— I thought that I was over it, but I— I don’t know. Maybe you never really are.”

His brain sorted through every moment of their year together, pinging off the countless examples of her self-doubt and insecurity. She was easily the most wonderful person he knew, but he could clearly see the cracks in the facade if he looked close enough. How had he missed it for so long?

“And then I met you, and you…” Y/N let out a wry laugh. “You’re easily the most interesting person I’ve ever met, but you made me feel like… I don’t know, like I’m interesting, too. Like I’m worthy of being with you, like I’m— like I’m good enough.”

He felt his heart splintering into a thousand tiny shards— good enough?

“But I can’t— I still have a hard time believing it sometimes. And I— I’ve been letting myself keep you at arms length. Letting you see parts of me, but… never giving you everything,” she admitted.

He watched her struggle to get the words out, her voice thick with the act of holding back sobs. He hadn’t realized she was carrying all of this. She was so good at supporting him and loving him through all of his trauma and issues, he hadn’t stopped to consider just how much she needed him, too.

She continued, “It’s why I took so long to say I love you… why I couldn’t talk to you last week. Because I just—” She shrugged as the tears rolled down her cheeks. “I keep waiting for the other shoe to drop. For you to realize that I’m really nothing special. That you’re getting bored, or there’s someone who’s a better fit for you, or one million other things. That I’m needy, and annoying, and too much work.”

A fresh tear tracked down her cheek, and he felt his own eyes filling. She never failed to put a stop to his own insecurities— reminding him that she liked his rambling, that he wasn’t irritating, that he was just the right amount. In his eyes, she was perfect. He would have never guessed she felt this way about herself.

She continued, “That’s what happened before, and none of those guys were even half as wonderful as you are.” She swiped a hand haphazardly over her cheeks, looking at him sheepishly. “And then I was hurtful and awful, and I realized that I was just creating a self fulfilling prophecy and I don’t— I don’t want to do that.”

Her hand shook a little as she brought it back down to twist in his scarf. “Because it’s never— I’ve never felt like this. I've never been this happy with anyone else, and I don’t want to give that up. I don’t want to give you up. Even if sometimes I feel like I’ll never be enough.”

Her voice cracked on a stifled cry, and his chest physically ached. “And if you never want to see me again, I completely understand, and I’ll leave you alone, but I— I’m just so sorry. And I love you so much, and I’m trying so hard to be better.” She sucked in a ragged breath and let it out on an exhausted sigh. “And that’s, um— that’s it. If you want me to go, I—”

“I don’t want you to go,” he interrupted.

Her eyes went wide. “You don’t?”

“Of course not.” Spencer stepped forward and reached for her. “Of course not. C’mere.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, she was tumbling into his arms with a choked off sob. He pulled her inside and closed the door behind them, walking her to the couch and sitting them both down. She clung to him like she was afraid he’d disappear into thin air.

“Y/N, I’m right here,” he assured her. “I’m right here, baby. I’m not going anywhere.”

“But if you n-need space, I understand,” she sobbed.

“I appreciate the offer, but I don’t need space. I think a week was long enough, don’t you?” he asked, pressing a kiss into her hair.

She pulled back out of the hug, head down. “But I really hurt you.”

He held her hand. “Yeah. And I really hurt you, too.”

She huffed out a breath. “That’s not how this works. I don’t get to hurt you just because you hurt me.”

“I know that.” He almost laughed at how indignant she sounded. “I’m not saying that we should hurt each other. I’m saying that sometimes it happens. And when it does, we apologize, and we forgive, and we move forward. And it’s okay if you need space. But I don’t.”

“What if you change your mind?” she whispered.

“Then I promise I’ll tell you.” Spencer tilted her chin up so he could meet her eyes. “I promise I’ll tell you what I need, as long as you tell me, too. We’ve gotta use all those communication skills we learn in therapy.”

Y/N nodded, and he pulled her into another hug. He closed his eyes, letting out a sigh of relief. “If I hadn’t heard from you by Sunday, I was planning to bother you until you talked to me.”

He could feel the beginning of a smile turning up the corner of her mouth where it was pressed to his shoulder. “You never bother me,” she mumbled. She held him for a moment longer and then released him from the hug and sat back, fidgeting with her hands and letting out a breath.

“Sometimes I need to be told that my worst fears about myself aren’t true,” she admitted. “I know that’s so annoying, but—”

“It’s not annoying,” he interrupted, putting an immediate stop to that line of thought. “Telling you how amazing you are isn’t the chore that you think it is. I’m sorry that anyone ever convinced you that it was.”

He covered her hands with his own, rubbing his thumbs softly along her skin. He couldn’t stop thinking about her dealing with all of this by herself. He hated that she’d ever felt anything less than adored. More than anything, he hated that he hadn’t been able to help her through it. And he wanted to make sure that he never made that mistake again.

“A wise man told me once... that love is helping someone navigate their storms,” he murmured, squeezing her hand. She looked at him then, and he continued, “You’ve been my lighthouse for a long time, Y/N. And I— I’m trying desperately to be yours… But you have to let me.”

Her eyes filled with fresh tears, but she nodded. He let out a long breath and pulled her hands into his lap. “I understand that sometimes you need space, and that’s fine. I’m happy to give you whatever you need.”

He shook his head. “Just— please don’t try to weather the storm by yourself. You can’t do it all alone; no one can.” He smiled ruefully. “I can tell you from experience that’s pretty much a guaranteed way to capsize your boat.”

His voice cracked a little at the end, and he felt a tear slip over his lash line. “I’ll help you repair your boat, or build a new one, or you can just float on mine for a while. It’s not perfect but it’s pretty sturdy, I think.”

She brought her fingers up to brush at his damp cheeks, and he met her eyes. “What I’m not going to do is let you float out on the ocean by yourself. I love you too much.”

She was quiet for a long moment, sniffling a little and just watching him— almost like she couldn’t believe he was there. She brought her hand back to his and laced their fingers together, rubbing her thumb along his skin. “I love you the most.”

“Agree to disagree.” He gave her a small smile and leaned forward to press his lips to her forehead. “Want some tea?”

She was frowning when he pulled back, her brows drawn together. “I need to tell you about Owen.”

The conversation he’d had with Anita was suddenly on replay in Spencer’s head.

… a real piece of shit… telling her lies about herself… isolating her… destroying her from the inside out...

He squeezed her hand. “You don’t have to tell me if you’re not ready. You don’t have to tell me at all if you don’t want to.”

She shook her head. “Talking about him takes away his power. I have to stop letting him have so much sway over my emotions.” She looked at him then. “I do things I regret and hurt people I love.”

He brought their joined hands up his lips. “Well, I’m here either way. And I’m still going to make you some tea.”

He stood and pulled her up with him, bringing her into the kitchen and refusing to let go of her hand. He filled the kettle and turned it on, found a bag of her favorite tea and ripped it open with his teeth. He dropped the bag into her favorite mug, and then made a mug up for himself.

“You know, it’d be a lot easier if you’d let go,” she said, the hint of a smile in her voice.

“Mhm,” he agreed, but he made no move to release her hand. In fact, once he’d fumbled a spoonful of honey into each of the cups, he dropped the spoon into her mug and turned to pull her into another hug. He hooked his chin over her shoulder and closed his eyes as she brought her arms around his waist. “I missed you,” he whispered.

She squeezed him tight. “I missed you, too. I’m so sorry.”

She buried her face in his neck, and he felt her breathe him in. He pressed a kiss into her shoulder and then settled his chin again. “Apology accepted, in case it wasn’t clear.”

They stood like that until the kettle began to whistle, and then Spencer kept her tucked underneath his arm as he turned to shut it off and pour the water into the mugs. They each grabbed a mug, making their way back to the couch and setting them on the coffee table to steep. Spencer kept their fingers intertwined and stayed quiet, letting her set the pace of the conversation.

Y/N took a deep breath and let it out on a long sigh. “I guess I should start at the beginning. I, um— I had my first boyfriend in high-school: Cal Cunningham. He was older and cooler, and so I felt— I don’t know… special when he picked me.” She rolled her eyes. “In reality, he was rude, and arrogant, and kind of a misogynist. We didn’t date for very long, but it kind of… set me up on this path of dating guys who weren’t very nice.”

Spencer ran his thumb soothingly along hers, waiting for her to continue. “When I started college, I dated this guy Adam for a few months. He was nice enough but really self-centered and a little immature. When we broke up I just wanted to be on my own for a while.”

“I was single for two years after that, just kind of… finding myself and whatever.” Her eyes tracked the path his thumb traced along her skin. “So when I started dating Owen at the end of junior year, it felt like my first real relationship. Like— we were both adults, and he dressed up for our dates, and he paid for things and bought me flowers and fit all the cliches.”

“And it was great at first,” she admitted. “We had a lot of the same friends, so we’d been hanging out for a while before we got together. He was a perfect gentleman— and smart, accomplished, and ambitious. I fell fast, and I fell hard, and we were sort of— it feels so stupid to say this, but it felt like we were an it couple.”

“A few of us made plans to move to DC after graduation— my friend Jess and her boyfriend Chris, Sam and Anita,” she explained. “And Owen and I, obviously. We moved in together in an apartment downtown. And that’s when everything changed.”

She drew her brows together. “It was little things at first. Like he’d jokingly call me stupid for forgetting something, or he’d complain about one of my friends being annoying. But it snowballed pretty quickly. He’d tell me I was stupid, and he wasn’t joking. All of my friends irritated him to the point where we couldn’t hang out anymore— even our former mutual friends. He thought that teaching kindergarten was a mindless, pointless job.”

Spencer tried to keep his heart rate steady, his facial expressions neutral, but his blood pressure was on the rise. No one deserved to be spoken to like that, least of all Y/N.

She continued, “We spent the holidays at my parents’ the second year we were dating, and he spent the entire car ride home explaining, in detail, how ridiculous and low-class he thought everything was.”

She shook her head and rubbed her free hand over her face. “I know it’s insane that I stayed with him for five years, but I— he did a really good job of convincing me that I was... that I was nothing. That he was doing me a favor by loving me. That he could have anyone, but he chose me. No one else was going to, so I should be grateful.”

He balled his free hand into a fist to avoid squeezing her to death. When Anita had said Owen was a piece of shit… he hadn’t realized just how deeply she meant it.

She picked at the fabric of her sweatpants, staring intently at the tiny pills. “When someone says all of that to you on a daily basis, and you’re not hearing otherwise from anyone else— because no one knew what was going on— when someone tells you you’re nothing… you start to believe it.”

Spencer relaxed his fist to bring his fingers up to her face, gently cupping her cheek. She leaned into his touch and closed her eyes for a long moment. He didn’t know what to say. Instead, he pressed his lips to her forehead in a voiceless assurance that she was, in fact, everything. He felt her relax under the warm pressure of his lips, and he hoped that was enough for now.

He sat back to let her continue. “We were together for five years, and we only broke up because he cheated on me. It was a long term affair; they were sleeping together for almost a year before I found out. And… a lot of people knew. Almost all of his friends knew. But I didn’t. I was still being this ridiculous, desperate little Suzy Homemaker trying to make him happy, even though he was still treating me like shit.”

She laughed, but there wasn’t an ounce of humor in it. “When I found out, I wasn’t even hurt. I was… embarrassed, I guess. But I was so relieved. I was so fucking relieved that I had a way out.”

He watched as her shoulders settled, almost like an actual weight had been lifted off of them. “I got a therapist and dropped all of the friends that were still hanging around with him. I moved to a new neighborhood, started hanging out with Anita and Sam, and just— started fresh. And I was doing really well. I’ve had my moments of insecurity here and there, but for the most part, I’ve been able to recognize the moments when I’m falling back into old thought patterns.”

She looked at him then, and her eyes were so soft and lovely that his heart ached. “You’re a big reason for that. You’re so open with how you feel about me, and… it makes things a lot easier.” She dropped her gaze with a sigh. “But I— he was at the party on New Year's. And I didn’t know he was going to be there until I was already there , and then it felt stupid to leave. I thought I could handle it—”

“And then I didn’t answer your call.”

“No, no .” She shook her head and reached her free hand out to grasp his arm. “That’s— Spencer, none of this is your fault.” She furrowed her brow, and the crease between them was practically an abyss. “He sort of— cornered me on the patio. I hadn’t seen him in like, four years? And he was complimenting me, and asking about you, and then he tried to— well, he did kiss me actually. I shoved him off, and he didn’t like that, and he did his whole Owen thing. Told me that he’d cheated because I was uninteresting and worthless. That eventually you’d get bored of me, too. Just, um— generally awful shit.”

She took a deep breath, and the rest steamrolled off her tongue and over his heart. “And then he just— left . And he’d absolutely demolished my self-image in less than ten minutes, and I was embarrassed and angry at myself, and then you didn’t answer, but I was kind of glad you didn’t because I didn’t actually want to talk about it. And I thought I could just move on, but then I was being weird, and you knew something was wrong. And I just wanted to pretend like it never happened, but then you kept pressing me on it, and I just— I didn’t want to have to explain it all to you because I was afraid that— that maybe he was right.”

Y/N dissolved back into the couch, an unwelcome indication of the emotional exhaustion that came with reliving trauma. Spencer moved closer and mirrored the position of her body against the cushions, bringing his face close enough to bump their noses together. They breathed the same air for one noiseless minute before she finally met his eyes.

“I need you to understand that not one single thing he said to you— on New Year’s or ever— was right, in either sense of the word. None of it was factual, and none of it was acceptable.”

She gave him a weary nod, and he continued, “You are the single best person that I know. You’re kind, brilliant, and driven. You’re interesting, and wonderful, and lovely. You’re my absolute favorite person on the planet, and I will never get bored of you.”

He let his eyes trace over all the angles and curves of her face, and then raised his eyebrows. “He’s lucky that I respect you enough not to go over your head, because what I’d like to do is run a full background check and find any and every possible transgression that could be legally investigated and then use that information to ruin his life.” He tilted his head in thought. “That or— get really jacked and then beat the shit out of him.”

“God, please don’t. As much as I’d love to watch that unfold,” she cupped his face in her hand, “you’re better than that. And he’s not worth either of our energies… I already wasted enough time dwelling on it and hurt you in the process.” She dropped her hand back to her lap with a sigh. “I spent so much time in that relationship that my brain didn’t know what to do with this good, healthy one.”

He took both of her hands in his, squeezing them tight and then pressing a kiss to the back of each. He wouldn’t commit assault, since she’d asked him not to. But he wasn’t going to let Owen taint any part of his life with her.

“I’m so sorry that someone you loved made you think it was hard to love you. Because loving you is the easiest thing I’ve ever done.” He pressed his lips together and mused, “But I think maybe love has a learning curve. Especially when you’re used to being hurt. You have to unlearn all the bullshit. People will have you thinking that you have to water yourself down, or change who you are, or make yourself more palatable. I thought that, too.”

He brushed her hair back away from her face and waited for her to meet his eyes. “And then I met you. And you love all of it— all of me. All the rambling, all the quirks, and— even the dark parts, too.”

She sniffled a little, but really smiled for the first time that night. “What’s not to love about you?”

He smiled back. “I’m not sure if you realize that I fully reciprocate that feeling. What’s not to love about you? I have a hard time thinking of even one thing about you that I don’t absolutely adore.”

“Even when I act like a horrid bitch?” she mumbled, only half joking.

He leaned his head against the couch cushion. “A year ago, you stood on my doorstep and gave me forgiveness— after I’d been a complete asshole to you... I told you then that I wanted to learn how to love with you. I still do. In all the wonderful, and the weird, and the terrible. Even when we get it wrong.”

He shrugged, and then ran a soft fingertip down the bridge of her nose. “There is no one else I’d rather get it wrong with. Because when we get it right… it’s the closest I’ve ever felt to magic.”

Her eyes sparkled with unshed tears, and she brought both hands up to his face, holding him with an adoration that made his own eyes burn. “You can believe that you love me the most,” she whispered, “but just know that you’re wrong.”

He leaned forward to close the distance between them, pressing a kiss to her lips with a reverence that felt technicolor and devout and more magical than any trick he’d ever mastered.

“Agree to disagree.”

———

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loserholland · 3 years

Text

𝐋𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐋𝐚𝐧𝐠𝐮𝐚𝐠𝐞 | 𝐁.𝐁

Pairing ➺ Modern!Bucky Barnes x Fem!Reader

Warning ➺ Nothing but fluff

Word Count ➺ 2.9k

Summary ➺ In which you discover Bucky’s love language.

A/N ➺ Based off a dream I had a couple nights ago, I’ve been trying to shift for the past ten months but I’m pretty sure that dream could’ve been me lucid dreaming? This is the full version- the previous version I posted was only half because I was afraid it wouldn’t do so well- BUT here we are! Enjoy! Comments and feedback appreciated <3

✿ 𝓟𝓮𝓻𝓶𝓪𝓷𝓮𝓷𝓽 𝓣𝓪𝓰𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓽 ✿ - @loveyathreethousand @killerqueen-gunpowdergelatine @spideyyypeter @lou-la-lou@babebenhardy @rivervixenbaby @acklesholland @zabdisamor @keepingupwiththehollands @sweet666pea @sspider-parker @jackiehollanderr @caro0512 @thewinchesterchronicles @cporter003 @kisses-holland @spideysnugget @cryszus @sunflowerharrystyles @peterunderoos @ohbabycal @laucontrerasv @spider-mendes @jessybellsworld @quaksonhehe

☞ Masterlist ☜

There are five different types of love languages:

Words of affirmation; Encourage, affirm, appreciate, empathize. Listen Actively.

Physical Touch; Non-verbal- use body language and touch to express love.

Receiving Gifts; Thoughtfulness, make your spouse a priority, speak purposefully.

Quality time; Uninterrupted and focused conversations. One-on-one time is critical.

Acts of Service; Use action phrases like “I’ll help..”. They want to know you’re with them, partnered with them.

Bucky’s love language was physical touch. Any chance he got, he’d have his hands on you, tracing random patterns on your arm, his face nuzzled into your neck, tracing the lines on your palm. Dragging you back to bed when you’re about to get your day started peppering kisses all over your face in protest.

Some people may see it as clingy but (Y/N) never saw it as that, she loved when Bucky showered her with love- he didn’t need to say anything when he’d come into her room from a long day at work, his eyes focused on his feet.

The sound of their bedroom door slowly creaking open caught her attention, she knew who it was. Slowly moved over to the other side of the bed, pulling back the duvet covers allowing the man to join her. Once he slipped under the covers he engulfed her into a hug, burying his face in her neck.

She ran her hand up and down his back soothingly the other tangled in his damp hair, he began to relax his shoulders more as she continued to massage his scalp.

They would lay like this till tell fell asleep, the next morning however Bucky wouldn’t want to let her go claiming she was too warm and huggable.

“Bucky honey? Ready to go?”

They were currently in California for her younger brother’s wedding. The last time they were in California it was for Christmas and, that’s when you had first introduced your family to Bucky.

“Do I look okay?” Bucky asked for what felt like the hundredth time, smoothing his hands over his pants.

(Y/N) cupped his cheeks pressing a chaste kiss to his lips, “You look handsome, as always Bucky. They’re gonna love you as much as I love you.” the door to your childhood home swung open revealing your mother. Bucky’s right hand immediately intwined with your left giving his a small squeeze.

“(Y/N/N)! Come in, come in! And oh! You must be James, she talks nonstop about you!”

“Mom!” (Y/N) whispered causing Bucky to chuckle loudly lifting his left hand for her mother to shake, “All good things I hope.” her mother laughed in return, “Oh none of that let me give you a hug!” You stifled back a laugh at your mother’s sudden action,

Bucky leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom raising his brows slightly, “Doll, I’ve been ready. You’re the one that’s still in the bathroom.” She lifted her gaze to the mirror a playful smirk painting her lips.

“Well, I wanted to get the day started but you pulled me back to bed.” Bucky pushed himself off the doorframe walking over to wrap his arms around her waist, resting his chin on her shoulder.

“Fine fine, we’re both at fault.” Bucky murmured kissing the base of your neck all the way up to your cheek, he spun you around moving his hands from your waist the the counter top caging you in.

He dipped his head down capturing your cherry stained lips it was easy to get lost in the moment when he had you like this, “Bucky.” he hummed against your lips moving his hands from the counter to cup her cheeks.

(Y/N) placed her hands onto his chest pushing him back slightly “If you keep kissing me-” he hummed again not budging from his spot “we won’t leave this bathroom.” she pulled away admiring his red stained lips.

“C’mon loverboy, I want to beat to the crowd.”

Loverboy

A nickname Sam one of Bucky’s friends from college had given him.

Sam watched as Bucky walked into the kitchen heading straight for the medicine cabinet taking out some painkillers and a warm compress. They were suppose to be heading out for a boys night but your cramps were killing you and even if you assured Bucky you’d be fine he didn’t budge.

He snickered to himself knowing exactly who they were for, he had told Steve many times that you had him wrapped around your finger and that anytime you enter the room he turned into a lovesick puppy.

“What do you have to say Sam?”

His back was still faced away watching as the keurig filled the mug up with hot water, he reached for the tea packets besides the k-pods tearing the packet open.

“Oh loverboy, you’re down bad there’s a word that Peter uses- pimp? No that’s not right, something imp-”

Bucky snorted as he placed the teabag into the mug, “An imp is a mischievous person.” Sam snapped his fingers, “Simp! That’s what they’re using now days.” Bucky glared tossing the teabag that sat in the mug long enough, “I don’t care what vocabulary Peter uses. Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m going to tend to loving girlfriend. See yourself out!”

Sam chuckled loudly before shouting, “Whatever you say loverboy!”

He entered back into your shared bedroom placing all the items onto the night stand, slipping under the covers so he can hold you in his arms. He sat up right against the headboard allowing (Y/N) to rest against his chest, “Bucky, you can go if you want I’ll be fine.” you mumbled a slight pang of guilt filled your chest.

“Doll, I’d rather be here with you. I see them at work everyday- now let me take care of you okay?”

“I love you.”

Bucky pressed a kiss to her forehead, “I love you too.”

The two wandered the women’s section dresses catching (Y/N) eyes as she tugged her boyfriend to follow, he didn’t mind shopping with her all too much because he’d encourage her to get literally everything she laid eyes on. She pushed off buying a dress for the wedding and of course waited till the day before.

“What about this one?”

She picked up the beautiful blue midi dress, perfect for the spring weather. She turned around lifting the dress next to Bucky’s cheeks, he raised his brow in confusion “Hm, I’m getting this one- reminds me of your beautiful eyes.” tugging his hands once again she looked for one more dress, Bucky’s cheeks were tinted a bright red.

(Y/N) loved seeing him flustered and left well speechless, “Doll you’re such a tease sometimes.” she stopped in her tracks turning around on her standing on her toes to press a kiss to his cheek.

“And you love it.”

She was rushing yet again to get ready due to Bucky not wanting her to leave mumbling five more minutes which turned into thirty. When they were in the shower Bucky wouldn’t let her leave, holding the two under the running water ignoring her protest before the sound of her mother knocking on the bathroom door caused them to get out.

“(Y/N)! Where’s James! Oh there he is-” Bucky sat on the bathroom counter top giving her mother a warm smile “(Y/N/N) hurry it up! We need to beat traffic, we need to be there first!”

Bucky chuckled, “It’s also like this in New York, we’re always the last to arrive any gathering.” she glared at her boyfriend playfully setting her curler down to slap his thigh.

“Five minutes!” her mother turned on her heels exiting her daughter’s old bedroom, she stuck her tongue out at her boyfriend “You were suppose to disagree.” he grabbed your forearm tugging you between his legs, “Not when it’s true.” she stuck her tongue out again trying to move away from his legs. Placing both hands on her cheeks he squished it lightly pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” he moved his hands to her waist capturing her lips, she placed her hand on his chest pushing back slightly to break the kiss. She waved her pointer finger from side to side, “Hm, now we both know you’re the reason why we’re always late.” He smirked lightly hoping on the counter slapping her ass with his metal arm playfully, watching as her mouth fell into an “O”.

“C’mon (Y/N/N) we don’t wanna be late.”

On their way to the ceremony (Y/N) and Bucky took the backseat while her mother and father took the front, every so often her mother would look into the review mirror noticing the two were fast asleep. Bucky had reclined the seat a little to allow her to rest her head on his chest, their entwined hands resting on his lap.

She smiled remembering the first time (Y/N) had called and told her about Bucky at first everything she said she thought it was too good to be true. Yet when she finally met him last Christmas, she saw how good he was to her and how much he loved her.

Bucky felt too nervous not wanting to leave your side even though your family welcomed him with open arms- many open arms to the point where you had to pull him away from your aunt Irene.

“I-Okay Aunt Irene, what about me where’s my hug?” you freed Bucky from the hug, awkwardly hugging your aunt who instead wanted to hug your boyfriend “Oh he’s a keeper (Y/N/N), look at that hunk of meat.” you chuckled awkwardly pulling away from the hug to stand next to your “hunk of meat” again.

Bucky slowly began to mingle, talking to your cousins, uncles, your brother and father, and even attempted to play with your niece and nephew. But from time to time he’d go back to your side holding your hand or wrapping his arms around your waist.

That’s when she saw it, usually most of (Y/N)’s cousins husbands/boyfriends would rather talk with the other men about sports and wouldn’t check up on their wives/girlfriends yet- here was Bucky coming back to your side any chance he got.

“Hey sleepyhead, we’re here.”

Your hand reached up to rub your eyes, Bucky caught it before you could ruin your mascara “Your makeup.” he mumbled causing you to blink a few times adjusting to the bright light shining through the window. Bucky opened the car door stepping out first then helping you out allowing you to stretch your muscles.

He lifted his hand to your hair fixing the pieces that looked out of place smoothing it down slightly, it’s the little things like this that made her think you’re for sure gonna marry this man.

“As beautiful as ever.”

(Y/N) smiled tugging at his tie to meet her halfway placing a sweet kiss on his lips, “Thank you, and I must say you look quite handsome as always. I should get you to wear more suits.” intwining your left hand with his right you two walked onto the beach seating next to your parents in the front row on the grooms side.

“Uncle Bucky!”

The four year old jumped onto Bucky’s lap, “Hey there’s the little princess!” (Y/N) smiled leaning her head onto Bucky’s shoulder, “No hi for your favorite aunt?” the four year old grinned from ear to ear “Hi Aunty (Y/N/N), do you like my dress?” her tiny fingers tugged at the hem of the dress almost the same colors as yours.

“Oh it’s lovely Arya, I must say we have the same taste.” she watched her niece nod moving her attention to play with Bucky, the two whispering and giggling. “He’s gonna be a great dad someday.” your mother whispered loud enough only for you two to hear.

The first time Arya had met Bucky she didn’t want to let you leave with him claiming that Bucky was now her boyfriend, it always made (Y/N) smile anytime Bucky interacted with her niece and nephew.

Your older brother and his family had recently visited you two last month, an Arya had already planned on spending the day with her Uncle Bucky saying that they had a date but (Y/N) was welcome to join the two. You always knew that Bucky would be a great dad, but that day confirmed you were willing to have a whole football team.

“Yeah, he’s gonna be the best.”

Arya hopped off his lap moving to go meet her mother so she could toss the flowers down the aisle.

Entwining her left hand with his right she gave it a little squeeze, Bucky lifted their hands kissing the back of her hand “Something wrong?” (Y/N) shook her head placing their hands onto her lap.

“No-” she brushed her thumb against the back of his hand “I love you.” Bucky leaned forward kissing his beautiful girlfriend.

“I love you too.”

Moments like this.

After the ceremony came the reception, your feet were killing you in these heels Natasha and Wanda basically pressured you into purchasing. You were eager to sit after standing for many photos, you sighed in relief wanting to undo the straps and go barefoot for the rest of the night.

Bucky too his seat next to you moving his chair a few inches away from you, “Why are you so f-” he lifted both your legs placing your feet onto his lap unstrapping the buckle of your heels before slipping it off.

Slumping against the door she let out a loud sigh, dropping her bag and kicking her heels off. It was another long day at work an all she wanted was to be in the arms of her boyfriend. “Hey doll! In the kitchen!” she padded over to the kitchen smiling at the sight in front of her, she sat on one of their bar stools.

“Hm- I can get use to this.”

Bucky turned around pointing his index finger at the apron, “Kiss the cook.” you snickered you had gotten that for him as a joke at first after he had complained about the oil splashing and staining his shirts.

“My feet are in too much pain to walk.”

He walked over seating in the free seat next to you grabbing your legs to place onto his thighs, you leaned forward kissing his plump pink lips the taste of red wine lingered on his lips causing you to hum. A low groan left your lips the moment he began to massage your feet.

“Oh I love you so much I hope you know that.” he gave her a cheeky smile both his hands massaging your slightly swollen ankles, no more heels for a long while.

Before dinner was served Bucky excused himself to the bathroom, that was nearly fifteen minutes ago. Excusing herself she wandered the halls searching for her boyfriend, “Aunty (Y/N/N)! Can you help me? I think I dropped Shanna!” Shanna was the name of her plush doll Bucky had given her before she had gone back to California, your brother would send pictures of Arya with the doll. She brought it everywhere.

The sun was beginning to set which would make it quite easy to find her doll, the four year old dragged her aunt towards the exit ushering her to pick up the pace.

“Arya- bub can we slow down? Let me remo-”

“I got it!” she waved the plush in the air, dusting the sand off before giving it a big hug. (Y/N) sighed, “That was easier than I thought.” Arya skipped towards her aunt stopping right in front of her “Last one back is a rotten egg.” turning on her heels she nearly ran into Bucky.

“Hi.”

The golden sun kissed his skin, he truly looked like a god standing there. (Y/N) walked towards him wrapping her arms around his neck, “I’ve been looking for you.” A cool sea breeze kissed their skin, she fluttered her eyes shut enjoying the moment “We need to visit more often.” she looked up at Bucky resting her chin against his chest. They stood there for a few more minutes savoring the moment, the only sound of the waves washing ashore echoing through the quiet beach.

“C’mon lets head in.”

She pulled away from Bucky tilting her head to the side noticing her family was standing at the entrance, “Oh- they must be wai-” her eyes widened as she watched her boyfriend get down on knee.

“(Y/N) (Y/L/N), it has been an amazing four years knowing you. You’re not only my girlfriend but my best friend. I can’t believe it took me nearly three years to ask you out, three years! I owe thanks to Sam everyday for introducing me to you, don’t let him know I said that-”

(Y/N) giggled ignoring the tears staining her cheeks, she could care less if her makeup was running.

“I’ve been planning this for the last four months, I want to thank your parents for giving me their blessing to do this. Four months into our relationship, I knew I was going to ask you to marry me one day and well now here we are. Also- your brother doesn’t mind that we’re kinda stealing his spotlight.”

“There better be an open bar at the wedding!” your brother shouted lifting his glass of champagne.

“I want to spend the rest of my life with you creating beautiful unforgettable memories. With that being said-”

Arya rushed over holding out a red velvet box, “Will you-” before he could even open the box she tackled him into a hug. “Yes! A million times left!” she cupped his cheeks kissing her fiancé. He pulled away briefly opening the box to reveal a beautiful emerald cut ring, slipping it onto her ring finger.

“I love you.”

She kissed him once more pressing her forehead against his.

“I love you too.”

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