#SORRY FOR REPOSTING THE SECOND ONE BUT LIKE.....IT FITS BETTER IN HERE ANYWAYS.... | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

koinotame · 29 days

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boob windows. that's it that's the fic

word count: 1.1K content warnings: this is meant to be yandere au and sagau/self aware au so uh. hint of that, but mostly just crack. nothing Super Nsfw but the whole thing is raunchy and suggestive humour

characters included: mostly ei, but childe, kaeya and briefly zhongli also make an appearance with some others mentioned

a/n: this is a repost (slightly edited)! this was on my to-edit-&-repost list for a while now and this seemed like a good day to do so lol. alas this was originally written before the sumeru release so while editing there wasn't really an opportunity for me to add in wriothesley apparently out-butting zhongli or lyney's tigh high garters and i only just realised kaveh could technically also count here so uh. forgive me. i'll write something for them some day

"is… is everything alright, your grace?"

you loudly suck up another boba pearl, not moving your gaze from where it’s been lodged the past several minutes. "mm, everything’s fine."

ei fidgets in front of you, the cup held tightly in her hands still almost full. she looks unsure, but decides that she knows better than to question you. "if you say so."

it’s clear this isn’t what she had in mind when she personally came to see you instead of sending the raiden shōgun to greet and attend to you. the one time she comes out of her plane, all you’re seemingly doing is ignoring all table manners and gawking at her chest.

yes, that’s right, you’re ogling her chest. or, more accurately, you’re ogling her tiddy window.

between her and kaeya, she’s showing off much more chest. but then kaeya knows what he’s doing, while ei just seems to have it there for convenience over aesthetic…

you squint at her while you get lost in thoughts, and ei’s fidgeting intensifies.

ah shit. you forgot about itto. he wins in terms of who shows off their chest the most, you guess. he’s even wearing that… you’re not sure what to call it but tit belt fits well enough. anyway, the tit belt accentuates his pecs very, very nicely, although they do hide his nips from sight. alas.

you suppose gorou and cyno also exist, but they don’t have the same appeal. oh, and navia and la signora, but both of them are just wearing a sleeveless, collarless dress, so you’re not sure that counts either.

but then by that argument, does itto count? he’s not even wearing a shirt. cyno isn’t wearing a shirt either. and what gorou has is more of a tummy window than anything… but he does have that little window?

between gorou and childe, gorou is definitely winning though. you’d apologise for slandering your poor ajax but between the little triangle he shows off and gorou’s entire tummy out… you’re not sorry. though… there’s something to be said about a small slither of skin inviting you to stick your hands into that gorou having his whole tummy out doesn’t have.

wait, wait. you just had a genius idea. actually, two.

first of all, zhongli with a tiddy window… you are considering. then again, you guess his biggest asset is his bubble butt.

second, and way bigger: an idol group with some of your characters… but they all have tiddy windows.

"…your grace?"

you’re brought out of your stupor by ei, who is gazing in concern at you. you blink at her.

she struggles to find words. "are… are you sure everything is alright? is something not to your liking?"

it’s then that you realise you’ve started drooling at some point. shit.

you hurriedly wipe at it and clear your throat. "yeah, I’m sure. sorry, were you saying anything?"

she looks taken aback. "no, please don’t apologise. I should be the one to… I shouldn’t have interrupted your thinking."

it’s then that childe happens to walk by, and, like the attention hog he is, tries to get a foot into the conversation. you stay mostly unresponsive while the two chat (which seems to be mostly childe trying to hold a conversation with you while ei admonishes him), your eyes drifting back to ei’s tiddy window.

you really could stare at that for the rest of your life.

childe then follows your line of sight and chokes.

…though more because of him trying to laugh while choking on the dango he was eating than embarrassment at having caught onto your very appropriate thoughts.

ei looks confused but makes no move to help him other than pushing his head away from the table so he doesn’t make a mess. you honestly can’t bring yourself to be embarrassed.

he finally manages to swallow properly (you almost want to pat him on the back and praise him for swallowing like a good boy) before turning to you.

"do you want me to strip? my chest looks much nicer, I assure you."

you and ei stare at him.

he raises his eyebrows, pointing at her. "her skin looks way too soft and pampered." she looks almost offended. "mine’s covered in scars and I have actual muscles, doesn’t that feel much better for fondling?"

"what if…" you lean closer to him mischievously, like you’re about to tell him some big secret. "I prefer soft chests?"

he deflates. ei flushes, ducking her head into her still-near-full cup of bubble tea. "well, if that’s what you prefer… I can’t get rid of the scars, but I can stop working out. hmm…" he looks like he’s starting to make serious plans.

"no, I honestly don’t really care. all tiddy is good tiddy." you clap your hands. "anyway! it’s more about the boob window. you already have a (sad) tummy window, so it wouldn’t work."

"why not? wouldn’t that be double the sexy?"

"no, it cancels out."

you’re going to ignore whatever gorou has going on, because that works pretty well.

ei looks unfathomably lost.

"and anyway, if we’re talking about tummy windows, gorou wins."

he deflates further.

then he perks up.

"what about…" he brings his fingers to his face. you think it’s an attempt at looking cool. "butt window?"

you deadpan. "have fun getting arrested for public indecency."

he winks at you. "I wouldn’t mind getting arrested if you’re the one punishing me."

you have to physically hold the electro archon back.

"why, I wasn’t expecting to run into any of you here. what are you three up to?" kaeya’s voice cuts through ei’s snarls all of a sudden. he seems amused, but there’s an edge in the way he eyes childe.

"I am definitely sexier than any archon or soldier," childe says at the exact same time that you say "we’re discussing tiddy windows."

kaeya lets out something between a snort and a chuckle. it’s a pretty sound, but you can’t let yourself be distracted by him. he knows what he’s doing.

"oh? in that department, don’t I win?"

you stare intently at his.

"do you want to touch?"

you move your stare to his face. "am I allowed to?"

he smiles, mirth in his eye. "you needn’t ask. all of me belongs to you, and that includes my chest."

you seriously consider it and childe takes the opportunity to shove himself between the two of you.

"wait, wait! I offered first! ignore him, I’m right here!" "your grace," ei cuts in, "if you’d like to, I don’t mind you touching any part of me."

"ugh, fine, fine! I’ll just sample all of you then. if you’re sure you’re okay with it."

zhongli, somehow, picks the absolute worst moment to walk in.

the look on his face is priceless (you can’t tell if he looks offended or jealous), but even that doesn’t compare to the feeling of soft tiddy in your hands.

you were right, tiddy windows really are the best.

#yandere #yandere x reader #x reader #genshin impact #yandere genshin impact #self aware au #self aware genshin #not sfw #lime #realistically ei probably WOULD have muscles (if not more than him) but. 1. none of the nonhuman characters in this game look like #they have an appropriate amount of muscle #and 2. the shogun is a puppet that presumably doesn't have actual muscles in the same sense as humans do in the first place. so.#i THINK this was supposed to take place in your teapot (hence why everyone is there despite logistics) but imagine whatever you want

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intothegenshinworld · 1 year

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Summary: Thoma and you promised each other to spend the Christmas alone together and to not buy any gifts this year. When Ayaka accidentally tells you he has something planned, you want to do some last minute gift-shopping, but the snow storm seems to have picked up and you’re running out of time!

A/n: Hi hi! I’m quickly breaking my hiatus to post this for the winter event of @dustofthedailylife!! I really liked the prompts but my life turned upside down so it ended up really hard for me to write this TuT But I hope it’s at least fun for one person! XD Anyways- I’ll be off till the new years most likely :) Sorry for the long wait!

Prompts used: “I guess we’re stuck here until the snow dies down.” & “This is the best gift I’ve ever received in my entire life” - both altered slightly to fit the story better.

“Are you kidding me?”

The storm outside seems worse than before. The wind has picked up and snowflakes race down from above, a few landing on the glass window in the door before they melt.

You feel your boyfriend Thoma place his hands on your waist before he gently pulls you back into his chest.

“I guess you’re stuck here with me until the snow dies down.”

If it wasn’t for your thick winter coat and the two scarfs he had wrapped around you, you could’ve turned around to see the soft smile on his face moments before he buried his face into the crook of your neck.

Around an hour ago, you had gotten ready for some last minute gift shopping. You both weren’t planning to buy any this year, but after Ayaka accidentally told you Thoma had plans to give you something after all, you wanted to return the favour.

You wonder why he bought you a gift.

Wasn’t it his idea in the first place to stay at home and ‘take things easy’?

“I can’t believe the storm decided to pick up right now! It’s been calm the whole day, and right before I wanted to go shopping it had to pick up again.”

You turn around in Thoma’s arms to lock eyes with him.

He’s wearing a red Christmas sweater with two reindeers on it– one similar to the one you’re wearing under your coat. His hair is messier than most days and his headband is discarded.

Thoma’s eyes soften a moment before his hands move up to your face.

“I told you, I don’t need any gifts.”

He gently cups your cheeks before placing a kiss on your nose.

“But I want to give you one.” You place your own hands over his, “You deserve it! You’ve been working so hard lately, and I know you’re already happy but-”

You sigh.

There’s no winning this argument. Not when all the shops close for Christmas tomorrow, and definitely not with the blizzard outside.

He presses another kiss on your cheek and pulls you in closer. “I don’t need any gifts, because you’re the best gift I’ve ever received in my life.”

He places his forehead against yours. You stay silent like that for a moment before he continues,

“Well…second best.”

You gasp as you pull back to look him in the eyes.

“Taroumaru places above me?” You place a hand against your chest to feign hurt.

“You have to admit, he’s very cute!” Thoma lifts his hands up in the air as he laughs. You gently push him against the shoulder and cross your arms over your chest.

“Maybe I don’t feel so bad for you after all.”

Thoma smiles and captures your hand. “Let’s get that coat off of you, alright?”

“Want me to make us some hot chocolate?” You wiggle your way out of your coat as Thoma gently removes the scarf from your neck.

“I’ll be with you in a minute, alright?”

◦

As Thoma hangs up your coat and scarf, he can hear you rummage around in the kitchen. A few cabinets open before they close, and he can hear you getting a pan to warm the milk in.

•

You’re really the best lover he could ever wish for.

◦

He stands still in the hallway for a moment. His hand moves to the small box in his pocket.

•

He really hopes you’ll accept his gift on Christmas and become his partner for life.

#dust winter wonderland #yaepublishinghouse #thoma x reader #genshin x reader #thoma genshin #genshin thoma #thoma #Genshin #genshin impact #genshin drabbles #genshin fic #genshin fluff #fluff #winter #still on hiatus though-#gonna poof after posting this one

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lazuli-writes · 10 months

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Sing

summary: Taeyong sings to his son.

pairing: Sire Lee Taeyong & Spawn Lee Donghyuck | Haechan

genre: angst (character death) / vampire au

estimated word count: 700 words

a/n: Based around the song Requiem On Water by Imperial Mammoth. Remember folks, copying other people’s works is plagiarism and that’s illegal. Don’t be that kind of person. Anyways, hope you all enjoy it :)

©little-lazuli. Do not copy, repost, or translate without permission

“Please… please stay with me Haechan-ah.”

Dry tears and sobs escaped Taeyong as he struggled to contemplate the scene set before him. He couldn’t understand how it got this far. With the vampire holding his spawn, his only child in the numerous eons of his existence, holding Haechan close to his chest as the dark magic poisoned him from within.

He assumed that his spawn, his child, his Haechan, the light of his life, would be a force to be eternally reckoned with. But as this unearthly poison consumed the younger immortal, he had realized that was no longer the case.

“Taeyongie… Papa…. I-it…. It hurts.“

A thick cough erupted from Haechan’s lips, cutting off his broken whimpers and pleas viciously as Taeyong was left trembling. Struggling to entertain the thought of this being the end of the road for his Haechan.

The weak croaking in his dying voice and the wheezes made Taeyong’s frozen heart break. It was so… unnatural to see Haechan in such a state. His Haechan was a spitfire soul. His Haechan was an endless flame of love and energy. His Haechan was the sun, shining brightly and sharing his never ending light with the world. But from this pit of melancholy that consumed Taeyong, a new emotion trickled into his conscience.

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry my son. Papa is so sorry he can’t fix this.”

His words came out in a near whisper as the pain forced him voice to diminish into a shattered mess.

Taeyong felt enraged. He could have prevented this. This shouldn’t have happened. All of this could have been avoided had he been faster. Better. Stronger.

“I-I know Yongie.”

Haechan’s strained voice was almost non-existent, to cruelly scratchy and gargling with viscous, rotten poison and blood. He hated it, Taeyong couldn’t stand the pain in his Haechannie’s voice.

Haechan’s weak grip held his hand softly. Taeyong could almost feel the faintest warmth of Haechan’s touch fade, becoming weaker, colder, emptier by the second. With his head in Taeyong’s lap and the elder’s eyes staring into the younger’s, Taeyong knew there was no possible way he could save Haechan in time.

Taeyong hated the mere thought of death having their way with his son.

It was a cruel twist of fate on both ends. With Haechan suffering for Taeyong’s past, and now Taeyong realizing that after nearly five millennia, he’d return to being something he absolutely hated. Alone.

Not wanting to ruin Haechan’s last minutes mewling over a situation Taeyong knew he couldn’t win, he just gripped his son tighter to his chest. Rubbing soft circles on his cheek, trying to mentally end his Channie’s suffering already.

Sighing and closing his eyes, he felt the pain of Haechan’s dying soul strangle his heartstrings. Ripping them out, root and stem, and crushing them one by one. Taeyong hated feeling like this. Helpless.

Haechan was an immortal being. An angel amongst the filth of mankind. Yet here he was, taking his last breaths because Taeyong himself was nothing like his Haechan. A kind soul. A sweet soul. A human soul. And his past actions have finally caught up to him, and has set to take his son from him.

“Can you… sing a song? Sing a song for me papa.”

Haechan’s words caught him off guard. Pulling Taeyong out of his thoughts that were now embossed with sorrow.

“What?”

“I always loved your voice… I-“ Another coughing fit, nearly strangling what little breath his son had “want it…. be the last thing I hear. Please papa.”

Every word from his mouth ate away at Taeyong’s sanity. But pulling himself together one last time, he began.

“The eyes that look up lifeless, from our twins below”

A weak but wholehearted smile appeared on Haechan’s face, as Taeyong’s angelic voice struggled to hold firm, and delivered its beautiful essence.

“Though your arms and legs are under,

Love will be the echo in your ears,”

Taeyong struggled to keep the sobs at bay as he caressed the breathing face of his son for the last time.

“when all is lost and plundered”

And as Taeyong sang despite his chains of sorrow, Haechan’s eyes slowly closed for the very last time. The disgusting black poison pooling out from every crevice on the younger’s beautiful, sun kissed skin.

“My love will be there still.”

And with the last whisper of their song, Taeyong could only roar in wrathful misery as he held his dead son in his arms.

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sanguineterrain · 3 years

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Brooklyn Honey - Bucky Barnes x Reader

(Repost!) Hello, this is for the lovely @wkemeup’s 9k writing challenge. I decided to go with the song prompt “Life in the City” by The Lumineers. It really reminded me of 40s Bucky.

Title: Brooklyn Honey

Summary: Life in the city ain’t always so pretty, but you’ve got Bucky and he’s got you.

Pairing: 1940s!Bucky Barnes x female!reader

Word count: 2.4k

Warnings: nah

***

“That’s so not how you do it.”

“Sorry, I must’ve missed the day you wrote the manual on how to put up curtains.”

“You sure did, and I can tell you as an expert, the nails aren’t supposed to resemble a mountain range.”

“Smartass. C’mere.”

Bucky’s palm opened and you took a nail, carefully tapping it into the wall.

“Or is it the skyline you’re going for?”

“You’re pretty mouthy for an assistant.”

“I keep it interesting, doll.”

“Is that what we’re calling it?”

“James Barnes, what on earth are you doing in there?!”

Your eyes went wide and you hurried to scramble off the chair you were standing on. Bucky put a hand on your back, shaking his head.

“Buck—”

“I got it, don’t worry. Keep hammering.”

“But—”

“Honey, don’t you trust me?”

“Absolutely not.”

More knocking, faster and louder this time.

“Coming, Mrs. Anderson!”

Bucky buttoned up his shirt, smoothing his pomade-slicked hair back, and went to answer.

You stepped down from the chair anyway, daring to peek around the corner.

He had his arms up, trying to fill the entire door frame and hide the obnoxiously yellow curtains you probably weren’t supposed to have. Mrs. Anderson, Steve and Bucky’s busybody next door neighbor, was a small, shriveled, old woman with a perpetually pinched face that looked like it had been stored in a jar of formaldehyde for the last twenty years. She kept trying to look over Bucky’s shoulder but he wouldn’t let her, moving when she did.

“—could’ve sworn I heard hammering coming from this apartment.”

“Oh! You must’ve heard me fixing my bike.”

“You don’t have a bike, James.”

“Did I say my bike? I meant Steve’s.”

“Steve rides a bike?”

“Absolutely. Keeps him fit.”

“I don’t recall seeing him ever—”

“Well, bye, Mrs. Anderson! Always a pleasure to see you, ma’am.”

She gave another stern look before shaking her head, walking away.

You sighed as Bucky shut the door with his foot, a too sly smile on his face.

“Didn’t I tell you to trust me?”

“I think you might be a worse liar than Steve.”

“Well, ouch, doll.”

“First of all, who’s ever heard of needing a hammer to fix a bike?”

“We can be the first.”

“Next time, I’m answering the door.”

You clambered back onto the chair, returning to knocking in the nails.

“I still don’t understand why you wanted curtains in the first place.”

“It adds a homely touch, doll. Aren’t you the one who’s always complaining about how drab this place is?”

“Of course, but it’s not my apartment.”

“It could be, with how often you’re over,” Bucky said sweetly.

“Keep dreaming, Barnes.”

“I will,” he assured with a smile that could melt butter.

You shook your head and returned to focus on the curtains. True, the first one was beyond help in terms of nail placement, but the least you could do was try and make the next one even.

Bucky had offered at least ten times to do it himself but there was no way he was getting his hands on a hammer after what had happened when he’d tried to install some shelves last winter.

Besides, you were better at decorating when it came down to it. At least, that’s what Bucky kept insisting, letting you do essentially anything you wanted to the apartment.

The chair suddenly groaned under additional weight and you startled as you felt the side of a body press against yours.

“How’s it goin’?”

“Bucky, this chair really isn’t meant for two people.”

“You sure? Seems pretty sturdy to me.”

“Yeah, I’m sure.”

Bucky wrapped an arm around your waist and you fixed him with a look.

“What? Don’t want you to fall.”

“How valiant of you.”

“Ain’t it?”

He hopped off before you could scold him further, grinning up at you.

“Beer?”

“Yeah, thanks.”

Bucky disappeared and returned a minute later with an open bottle for you, holding it so you could sip safely while still perched on the chair.

Then you kept hammering, eyes narrowed as you focused on not hitting anything other than the nail.

Bucky watched from the floor as you did so, leaning back on his hands.

“What’re you looking at?” you asked after a while, glancing at him from the corner of your eye.

He shrugged, a gentle smile on his face.

“The city.”

***

“Honey, I’m home!”

“What did I say about that, Barnes?”

“You said… you’ll love me for all eternity because you’re as sweet as honey?”

“I think it was more along the lines of, ‘don’t call me honey unless you mean it.’”

“I always mean it, Y/N.”

And that was a little more sincerity than you were willing to explore, so you pointed to the bag instead.

“What’s that?”

Bucky grinned, setting a giant paper sack on the counter.

“Lemons.”

“What?”

“Lemons. You know, the little yellow fruits that make you do this?”

Bucky puckered his mouth and smacked his tongue, eyes screwed shut.

“Lemon’s not a fruit.”

“It sure is! Fruit got seeds. Read that in a book about agriculture. We produce a lot of corn, did you know that?“

“Okay, Bucky, the presiding question still remains: why do you have every lemon in the city?”

“There was a good deal at the docks. Dirt cheap for produce. Some guys told me they were takin’ some home for their wives. Didn’t want you to feel left out.”

“I’m not your wife.”

Bucky just grinned. You rolled your eyes.

“I don't know who taught you this, but the way to a girl’s heart is not twenty pounds of lemons.”

“Think of all the lemonade we can make.”

“Unless you’ve also got FDR and his cabinet in those bags, we’re gonna have a lot of leftovers.”

“Look at it this way: no vitamin C deficiency. One less thing to worry ‘bout.”

“Bucky.”

“They’re not all lemons, doll. I got other stuff too. Tomatoes, cabbage, snuck some cucumbers, even bananas.”

You sighed, smiling tiredly. This ration was taking its toll on everyone. You knew Bucky was doing his best, had seen the vegetables and thought of you and how much you missed having cucumber salad and tomato sandwiches like you used to.

“Thank you, Bucky, really. I appreciate you.”

You brushed past him to begin preparing the excess vegetables you three wouldn’t eat this week to pickle. Salt and sugar was going to be hard to gather, but you’d manage. You always did.

“Welcome, doll.”

He beamed, eyes full of warmth as he watched you.

“You gonna stay for dinner?”

“I dunno. Seems like Steve’s gettin’ kinda tired of me,” you laughed.

“Never. ‘Sides, even if he was, doesn’t matter.”

“Oh, really?”

“Nope. ‘Cause you stay for me.”

“And where did you get that idea from?”

He shrugged.

“Seemed kinda obvious, doll. You’re smitten, admit it.”

“Oh dear, you’ve got me all figured out. However did you know?”

“I’m a bright fella.”

“Uh-huh.”

“You ain’t saying no…”

“Really, I have to say no? Can’t you tell I only stick around for the great deals you get on produce?”

“But it’s me that gets the great deals, so really, you’re still staying for me.”

Bucky was against the counter now, shoulder to shoulder with you.

You sighed, hand on your hip as you stared at the table.

“What the hell are we going to do with all these lemons?”

“We’ll figure something out. Always do, don’t we?”

You hummed, leaning your head on his shoulder, aware he was talking about more than the lemons.

“Yeah. We always do.”

***

Steve had been home for a while, wordlessly letting you in when you’d shown up an hour ago. You didn’t have to explain anything to him anymore.

The record player was on, crooning gently. Steve was in the corner, drawing, away from the window after the breeze had whipped his papers around one too many times.

“Can’t believe they’re building another skyscraper down on Lawrence.”

Steve frowned.

“Really? Won’t be able to see the sunset now.”

“Yeah. And Brooklyn’s not exactly known for its scenery to begin with. Saw a rat and a pigeon fighting over a pretzel this morning.”

Steve chuckled from the floor, shaking his head.

“Times are tough. Even for rats and pigeons.”

“Sure are.”

“Nice curtains, by the way. I like the color.”

“Oh. Yeah. Sorry. Did Bucky ask—?”

“No,” he answered, smile evident in his voice. “But that’s alright. I know he’s just tryin’ to gauge what you like.”

“What?”

“Yeah, after the war’s over and all, he’s gonna try and buy a nicer place.”

“And he wants my furnishing tips?”

Steve shrugged, gaze soft and knowing.

“Guess so.”

You cleared your throat, pushing a lock of hair behind your ear.

“Want some lemonade?”

“Jesus, there’s more? I thought we’d run out of bushels.”

“You’d think, right? I put ‘em in the icebox so they won’t spoil so fast.”

“Sure, yeah. Thanks, Y/N.”

You were in the middle of stirring the pitcher when Bucky came in.

He didn’t greet you or Steve immediately, like he usually did, instead setting down his keys, then slapping the mail onto the table.

“Well, hey there, mister. Fancy a drink? Today’s special is sour lemonade, your favorite.”

Bucky looked up, startled, and glanced at the pitcher before nodding, attempting a half smile.

“Sure, doll. Thanks.”

“Everything okay, Buck?”

He nodded, slipping away to the bathroom with a sigh.

You turned to Steve, who shrugged.

“Long day at the docks, I guess.”

***

June twelfth. That was when Bucky was being shipped out, somewhere in Europe, too far from you. This entire year you’d been holding your breath, hoping, needing the draft to leave him alone.

Now they were taking him away from you in less than a week.

You were in the apartment, lying on the floor, on Bucky’s second to last day. That’s how he found you upon coming home.

“Trying to count all the cracks in the ceiling, doll? You’ll be here all night.”

You had a glass of lemonade by your head, spiked with a bit of rum. It was already warm, because it was summer and things were supposed to be warm in the summer.

The curtains danced in front of the window, yellow like sunshine and all those goddamn lemons in the freezer. The only respite from an otherwise colorless world.

“This city is so ugly.”

Bucky looked up at the sound of your voice. He walked over, crouching by your arm.

“Think so?”

“Yeah. Can’t find a single pretty thing in the city.”

“I can.”

“Can you?”

“Sure. She’s looking at me right now.”

“That was sappy.”

“Yes it was.”

Bucky lay down, rolling onto his side next to you, taking a sip from your glass.

“But I ain’t mean it any less.”

You hummed, closing your eyes.

“Well, for what it’s worth then, I think you’re handsome.”

“Oh, yeah?”

You could hear his proud smile.

“Don’t make me take it back.”

“No, I’m just surprised to hear it is all.”

“Surprised, huh? I’m certain I ain’t the first one to call you handsome.”

“You’re the only one I wanna hear it from.”

Something fluttered in your chest.

“What d’you say then? You and I, think we can take on a city as ugly as ours?”

He smiled.

“With you, doll?”

“Yeah.”

“With you, of course.”

“Good. I’m gonna hold you to that.”

Bucky propped his head up on his elbow. It was quiet again, with only your occasional sighs and his quiet breaths.

“What’re you looking at?” you breathed, opening your eyes.

“You.”

Bucky flicked a drop of lemonade from the tip of your nose.

You turned, now face to face.

And oh, Bucky’s blues. Those had been your color even before the curtains.

“I’m gonna miss you,” you blurted.

He smiled a little sadly.

“Gonna miss you too, Y/N.”

You pushed your lips together, taking a deep breath.

“You were right, you know.”

“‘Bout what?”

“That day when you brought home all those lemons. You said that I stay for you.”

Bucky’s lips quirked, gaze fond like it always was.

“All those times I stayed for dinner and pretended to know what I was doing putting up those curtains. I stayed for you.”

You wiped your nose quickly, sniffling.

“And I’m gonna keep staying.”

“Yeah? What if the bridge collapses tomorrow?”

“I’ll swim.”

“Even in the winter?”

“I’ll get myself a pair of ice skates.”

“You don’t know how to skate, doll.”

“That’s right. So you better come back safe and teach me.”

Bucky leaned in, nose brushing your cheek. He rolled over and carefully straddled you, holding his weight.

“I’ll be there, honey.”

“Now what did we say about that?”

Bucky’s eyebrows pinched in thought.

“Don’t say it if I don’t mean it?”

You hummed, pulling him closer, arms around his neck. Bucky’s lips were a millimeter from yours, breath fanning over your chin.

“Mm, I think it was something about eternity.”

Bucky was soft, tangy and sweet. His scruff scraped your cheek and your fingers curled into the baby hairs at the nape of his neck.

He slid his hands under your back and turned so you were on top, head on his chest. You lay like that for a while, listening to his heartbeat, arms strong around you.

Yellow fluttered in the breeze, tacked unevenly onto the wall, catching your eye.

Bucky glanced to the side, chuckling.

“Don’t let Anderson take our curtains away.”

“Of course not. I spent a weekend on those. She’ll have to fight me for ‘em.”

“Good God. Now I gotta worry about you brawling with old ladies and Steve getting into alley fights while I’m gone?”

“Nah. Steve’ll help me.”

“Oh, great.”

You reached up, brushing his jaw with your knuckles.

“Call me honey again.”

“Honey, honey, honey.”

You reached up to get just one last kiss, except it definitely wasn’t going to be the last. It couldn’t be.

“They’re not gonna take you away from me.”

Bucky shook his head, kissing you much slower this time, trying to memorize you before time ran out.

“Never. ‘M gonna think of you and I’ll be back ‘fore we know it.”

You nodded, wishing hard, hoping somebody was listening.

“Then, when I come back,” he whispered, promise riding on the summer air.

“We’re gonna make the best damn lemonade you’ve ever had.”

And maybe this city could take away your sunsets, your tea and jams, even your summer.

But if there was anything that was yours and yours only, it was the lemon pulp on Bucky’s lips and the undissolved sugar on your own, as bitter and pretty as home.

#bucky barnes x reader #1940s bucky barnes #bucky barnes x you #bucky barnes x y/n #bucky barnes fanfiction #kas9kwc #repost for those of you who asked <3

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chocominnie · 3 years

Text

One Last Time 02 — Pjm. (M)

⇢ pairing: Jimin X Reader

⇢ Genre: Idol!Jimin, Exbf!Jimin, model!reader, sad au, fluff, tons of smut, angst

⇢ Synopsis: Your idol ex boyfriend Jimin cheated on you. You two have been broken up for a while now and the media has been keeping track of you and him. You’re trying to get over him, but the things that happen inbetween makes you re-think the entire breakup, and so does Jimin…

⇢ Song : xxxxx

⇢ Previous : 00 01

⇢ Word Count :

⇢ Warnings: dominant jimin, makeout sessions, this is honestly a sad angsty au, cheating, pregnancy, unprotected and protected sex, a bunch of sex, no really a LOT of sexual themes too, I know I’m forgetting some but sorry in advance!

⇢ Copyright: please do NOT repost, translate, or modify my works in any way, shape or form, on any platform. If found doing so , it is considered as plagiarism and appropriate LEGAL action will be taken

⇢ Authors note: This is my mini series for the summer! Get your tissues, things to take your anger out on, and sit back and watch the drama unfold. Shall we begin?

Your eyes shoot open, chest heaving heavily as you let out a blood curdling scream. Not this again. The same dream over and over again each night. It leaves you sleepless. The time on the clock on your nightstand reads 3:04 am. Just only four hours ago is when you fell asleep. But a full night’s sleep hasn’t happened for a year so why would it matter anyways.

Once you catch your breath you unplug your phone from the charger and read some of the notifications. From your window, the night-time critters sing their songs along with the persistant owl that’s somewhere around the apartment complex. You’d only noticed him, the owl, just a few months ago when your cat started meowing with his hoots.

A missed call from your uncle.

Immediately you unlock your phone and dial the number. Bringing your index finger to your mouth you gently nip on it waiting for it to answer, The rings are agonizing to you. If something has happened you only wish and pray it wasn’t as bad as you think. He’s the only parental figure left in your life.

‘‘ Princess! Hello I was just calling to speak to you earlier. But I realized you are five hours ahead of me and you had probably went to sleep.’‘

His soothing voice calms your emotions making you let out a tiny breath of air. Thank god.

‘’Hey Charlie.” You sigh. Looking towards your left, you spot Clara purring quietly next to you. You can’t help but to smile while bringing a hand over to rub her head with your thumb. She’s so small under the shining moonlight from your window.

Her white coat shines brightly amongst her, making you remember the first night you had brought her home. All she did was sleep, and it worried you because you had no prior expierence caring for anything, let alone a small animal. Clara only drank kitten milk and slept back then. Occasionally being awake enough to nip at your fingers whenever you pet or touched her.

Now she’s a bit bigger and walks around the apartment like she owns the place. Quite the little attitude she has, but its too damn cute for you to scold her whenever she does something wrong.

“ Yes I did fall asleep from after a gathering at someone’s house.’’ You continue on, bringing your knees to your chest after opening the curtain of your window fully.

The moons brightness illuminates the entire room, but not so bright for you to complain though. ‘’ Oh- was it Jimin’s? Tell him I said hell-’’

You bite your lip hard at his name. He doesn’t know and you wont even dare to let him know. Knowing him, your uncle would have a fit and oppose to come back to Seoul to ‘set the record straight.’ to Jimin. That’s the last thing you want to do, cause trouble.

‘‘ It was his brother’s house warming party.” You say, lowering your tone in your voice. You look at the nightstand for a couple of seconds just before opening the top drawer of the wooden, polished piece. Your hands shakily pull out a picture of you two together.

It was taken at Marne-la-Vallée, France right infront of Cinderella’s castle. That was the day that you and Jimin had to went to Disneyland in Paris, France. You cant help but to think, with the picture in hand, that it was one of the best nights ever. It was also the same night your virginity was taken.

‘‘ Oh.. I know that tone. Are you two arguing at the moment.”

You shrug, “ I mean you could say that.’’

No you cant.

‘‘ Alright alright I won’t talk more of him. Let’s change the subject.” He chuckles deeply into the phone.

‘‘ How’s Europe? Anything new happening on base?”

‘‘ Same old Same old. It’s been what? 2 years since I’ve left Seoul? The food is different over here. They don’t have kimchi pancakes sadly.”

You can only imagine the frowny face he makes at you whenever he doesn’t approve or like something. It always turns out to be funny.

You giggle into the phone shaking your head slightly, “ Of course. You are in Europe Charlie. Where are you getting food from anyway if you are on base?’’

‘‘ I can go off base to a certain mileage when I am off duty. I just have to report back in time. But you do know that you can always come live on base with me...’ He trails off.

Oh boy. Here he goes. He’s always talking about moving you on base with him. Hell, he’s been talking about it since before he had to go to be based in Europe. By then you were twenty years old and old enough to live by yourself. Growing up in Daegu, Korea since you were six, you felt as if Korea was home to you and you definately weren’t ready to leave yet.

Especially, after losing your parents here. Around eight years old, your aunt and mother were on the way to pick up your father from the airport. With your mom and dad also being military and based in Korea with your dad’s bestfriend, your uncle Charlie, your father had been called to take military leave to go and be based in Korea for the National Guard.

On the way back from the airport, a drunk driver had struck the car knocking them off the road and colliding head first into the railing of the bridge. All bodies were reported dead upon collision, including your aunt. Charlie didn’t take the news well at all, and so did you. Only eight years old and still a bit new to a foreign country. It was devistating for you and Charlie. Charlie did what was right and stepped up to be your legal guardian while taking some time off from the military. Till this day, he treats you like his sacred little daughter and you can’t ask for anyone better than him.

“You are old enough to live on your own and housing is avail-”

You jump at his voice on the line again, being too spaced out from the tragic memory. Before he can go on any longer you cut him off. ‘‘ Im fine with the apartment you left me. Im paying the bills on time and taking good care of it.”

‘‘ Alright fine. But that option is always available you hear me? I will always be ready for you to come with me.’’

‘‘ Okay Charlie” You groan.

‘‘ Alright.. sweetie it’s getting late on this side and it’s already 3 am on your side. Get some sleep okay? Don’t you have a model shoot thingy or something? You have those a lot.’‘

‘‘ Yes i actually do in a couple of hours. It’s been a while since I’ve did a shoot. Please eat and sleep well. Don’t injure yourself.’‘

‘‘ I promise. You promise to do the same right?’‘ He says, rustling movements are in the background.

‘‘ Yes I promise. Good night sleep tight..’‘ You smile as you wait for him to finish the rest.

He chuckles one last time on the other end, ‘‘I’ll always love you, goodnight‘’

Beep Beep Beep

You in a racy light pink lingerie with white duvets and sheets is the concept of your comeback. It’s supposed to symbolize the “Night After’’. Camera’s click and directors yell and praise you in your subtle yet damaging moves and facial expressions. You want.. no need for this comeback to be successful. Not only did your manager schedule this, but she is making sure that they release this same very day.

Nobody in this company’s industry has ever did this before. But you, you are sort of the special one. The special foreigner as they say. It’s not like you don’t like it but you don’t like that they label you as that. Stylists, employee’s hell even anybody who works there treat you as a princess. It’s not bad, but it’s just weird.

‘‘ One last one. Give me a sexy yet innocent look mama.’‘ Elliot, the director says, smiling wide at you.

You slip a finger into your mouth and do a little pout with your lips.

Elliot busts out into a roar of happiness with his hands clapping furiously. ‘‘That’s it mama yes! That’s just what we needed!’‘

Adjusting his microphone earpiece, he turns around to greet and thank everyone, ‘‘ Alright everybody this concludes our shooting! You all worked so hard today. Make it home safe, eat well.’‘

Finally. You sigh out in relief and close your eyes. It’s been a long day. Almost 6 hours of shooting. Three Videos, and five swap outfits for each session of shooting for the ‘’ Night After’’. As everyone heads out and starts cleaning up you bow your head slightly and thank them.

A stylist brings you a satin robe to cover yourself in. You thank her and put it on just before getting up from the bed and walking towards wardrobe. Once you are done putting on your clothes, your manager leads you straight out the exit. Outside awaits the car that drives you everywhere. Literally everywhere.

‘‘ Tomorrow somebody has put in a special request for you to appear as the main lead girl in their music video. It’s short notice and I told them I would have to bump some things around and notify you. But they are paying us and you good money to be in it.’‘

Money? Sounds like a plan.

‘‘ It’s fine. Who am I shooting for?’‘ You say, fluffing your hair just a little while inspecting yourself in the rear view mirror.

Your makeup is still intact with no ruins and the contacts they had given you suited you very well. A hazel with a slight bit of teal. Suddenly the car moves off into the busy streets of Seoul. You can’t help but to notice every couple that walks along the sidewalks. They seem so happy, glad to be around each other.

On the floor of the car lies your little mini backpack filled with all of your items and belongings. Picking it up, you begin to dig through it looking for some hand lotion to soothe your semi-dry hands. Once you find it you gently start to squeeze the tube.

‘‘ Kim Namjoon.’‘

You freeze. Namjoon? The same Namjoon from the group? Joonie? It’s been well… a year since you’ve seen him in person. Hell since you’ve seen all of Bangtan Sonyeondan together. Except for lastnight when Hoseok and.. that guy showed up.

You sigh already knowing the answer from the question you are about to ask.

‘‘ From…?’‘ You ask then put the lotion back in your bag. Slowly you rub your hands together to moisturize.

Your manager quickly flips through the daily planner, ‘‘ Bangtan Sonyeodan but this is for one of his mixtape songs.’‘

Thank goodness.

‘‘ That’s fine. What time will the car be arriving tomorrow?’‘

‘‘ 8 am on the dot. You need to be there by 8:30. I’ll be tending to one of my other models tomorrow so you will be alone. I can send som-’‘

‘‘ No no it’s truly okay. I know how to manage things myself. Besides, I learn from you.’‘ You reassure her with one of your winning smiles, laying your head on her shoulder.

‘‘ Aigoo what am I going to do with you?’‘

The day ends very well. The movies you’ve been watching have kept you occupied. But not occupied enough for you to keep crying at all the sad parts in the chick flicks. Breakups, someone had died, someone had even just spilled something onto the floor and that was enough to send you into tears.Only because when the main lead boy rushed to help clean it up, it reminded you of Jimin last-night helping Isabel.

‘’What is going on with myself.’’ You blow your nose into a tissue for what seemed like the thousandth time today. Clara lets out one of her meows beside you then goes back to grooming herself.

You place her onto your lap and begin to run your fingers through her fur over and over again. Such a soothing effect to you as you stare into space sulking in your thoughts.

Why is it that you weren’t enough for him? Why is it that every single little thing reminds you of him? You gave him your all and he gave you his but what happened? Where did you go wrong? Cooked, cleaned, satisfied his needs. You guys had even started to plan out what you wanted out of a family. When you wanted a baby and what you would name it. It was fun. The whole relationship was fun. Right until that scandal.

Ding.. Ding.. Ding.. DI-

You unlock your phone immediately to stop that annoying dinging noise. Not surprisingly it’s a text from Jeon Jungkook.

Kookie : Im coming over I’ll be there in exactly 3 minutes.

Kookie: Don’t think about leaving either.

Kookie: Im bringing someone with me.

Kookie: We need to have a serious talk babycheeks.

You roll your eyes at the nickname he’s given you. No matter how many times you tell him you want him to change it, he declines. There’s no point in asking anymore.

Why would he want to talk anyways and who is the person he’s bringing. Eh.. it might just be Ryan they seem to do everything together as a team.

As soon as you step foot out of your bed the sound the door clicking makes your head shoot up. How in the living hell does he know the password to your house? Rage takes over you. That’s something that you hate. When people invade your personal space. In this case, personal home.

‘‘ Jeon fucking Jungkook!’‘ You scream, abruptly stomping your feet all the way to and out your bedroom door. Suddenly you stop at the sight of the two faces staring back at you.

Jungkook’s expression holds a concerned yet upset face while the other just stands there calm and cool. But you on the other hand are way besides that level.

Your eyes must be filled with rage and the expression on your face is no good. How dare he disrespect you like that? Bringing him into your home, knowing the bad blood between you two. Oh, they both have something coming towards them. You begin to walk to them again making each step make the floor shake.

‘‘ Get out. Both of you. One you invade my personal private home..’‘

You grab both boys by their collars, making sure to grip the one on the right’s harder than usual. ‘‘ Two, you fucking invite him over here.’‘ You drag each of them towards the exit. Which is going good until Jungkook rips your hands away from his shirt and takes you over his shoulder.

You’ve had enough of him and his invasive ways. Pounding on his back with your fists, you make sure to scream into his ear. “ Put me the fuck down Jeon Jungko-”

You hiss at the stinging sensation on your ass. Did he just? Jimin stands there awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. You make sure to make eye contact with him and roll your eyes. Something that always had and will piss him off.

‘‘ Hush. I told you all of us needed to have a deep talk about you.’‘

Jungkook plops your frail body onto one side of the couch in which he sits next to you. He motions for Jimin to come sit across from the both of you but you aren’t having it.

‘‘ Don’t you do it.” You glare at him. Jungkook sighs harshly only to pluck your forehead two times. You whine and rub it with your index and middle finger.

Jungkook shakes his head in disapproval, ‘‘ When are you ever going to learn? Jimin sit down now.”

‘‘ Truthfully.. I feel as though I shouldn’t be here so-”

“ Good. Get out you are unwanted.” You snap back causing him to give you one of his long stares with no facial expression at all.

Jungkook glares at you just before getting up to throw his hands in the air full of disappointment. “ Enough! “

Yelling. Something else you don’t like to hear being done at yourself. You finally sit still and quite avoiding any eye contact with the both of them.

He sits back down and clears his throat. Jungkook gives Jimin a look before continuing on.

‘‘ I gathered us here to talk about you..”

‘‘ Why. Im fine. How many times do I have to say it. Im fine im fine im fine im fucking fine!’‘ You exclaim, getting more mad by the second. When will people accept this?

‘‘ Baby.. ’‘

Your eyes shoot up to him and his soft voice. You didn’t want to but you did because his voice to you is like candy that melts into your mouth.

‘‘ Don’t call me that. You have a girlfriend at-least be loyal to her rather than what you did to me.’‘

‘‘ Fuck is anybody going to just sit here and listen? Can we at-least get to the source of the problem? Huh?’‘ Jungkook leans back into the couch clearly pissed by your attitude.

Jimin’s the first to speak and holds a firm eye contact with you, almost daring you to break away from it.

‘‘ Fine. Im just going to cut straight to it then. Why are you so jealous? You aren’t okay at all. I seen the way you looked at us yesterday. You wanted to break down so bad but you didn’t. It looks like you’ve been dropping weight day by day why aren’t you eating well?’’

You’re taken a-back by his jealous comment. Although you are you just cannot admit it. You are jealous. You do want him back. You cant bear to see him with another girl but you. But the fact that Jimin is concerned makes you really hope. Just hope that there is something left of you still in his heart.

‘‘ Jealous? Jealous tuh.” You scoff, leaning into Jungkook’s arms where you rest his head on your chest. You only do this just to see Jimin’s reaction and by the look on his face he doesn’t enjoy that move one bit.

‘‘ Yes jealous. I mean why else would you put almond extra-

‘‘ Woah. No need to go there. We established that it was a so called accident lastnight.” Jungkook does finger quotes into the air and looks down at you.

You lift your head up and furrow your eyebrows in annoyance, “ So called? So you really believe that I did it on purpose. Wow Jungkook. Escort yourself out.’’

He sighs, wrapping his arms around you securly in hopes of you settling down a little, “ Honestly it’s not like that. I wasn’t there to see you bake them nor was I watching her eat it. Im just saying that you knew Jimin was coming and obviously his girlfriend was going to come too. It’s a little sketchy is all.”

There’s no fixing what he said. Him adding onto his explanation just made things sound worse than what he’s trying to say. You don’t have time to be ganged up on, nor like it at all. It’s best if they both just leave, to not turn nothing into something.

‘‘ Get out. Now. Before I call and tell Ryan what you said and then she’ll definitely deal with you.’‘ You say, removing yourself from off of him and onto the other side of the couch with your legs crossed.

Mad isn’t even the word to describe yourself right now. You’re just a mixture of all emotions.

Jungkook now looks of sorriness written all over his face. You bite your lip and shake your head while pointing towards the door. He sighs heavily and takes one last look at you while removing himself from the couch. You watch him slip on his coat and shoes.

Jimin gets up from his spot on the couch, ‘‘ I’ll be leav-”

‘‘ Sit down we aren’t done talking.”

He looks at you with his eyebrows furrowed, sitting back down slowly.

Jungkook keeps his head down as he wraps his blue scarf around his neck. Poor baby, but he shouldn’t of said it. “Please better yourself and talk it out with each-other. Im leaving.”

‘‘ Make it home safely.. Kookie.” You sigh once the door closes behind him. Now you’re here. Face to face with Park Jimin.

The same Jimin who cheated on you. The same Jimin you haven’t seen in a while. You take a few moments to take in his appearance. He seems to have re-gained his muscles that are peaking through his black, longsleeve shirt. His thighs are still thick, just like his luscious lips. Of course he changed his hair color to black. But who knows, he might change it again.

‘‘ You’ve been doing well?’‘ You say, voice low but enough for him to hear. You drop your eyes to your lap instead of keeping intact with his.

‘‘ Yes. But you have not. Im disappointed in you. Why are you doing this to yourself? Don’t do this because of me.”

‘‘ Jimin you don’t know the feeling. You don’t know how it feels to be left wondering why you weren’t good enough for someone. Why they had cheated on you. You don’t understand at all and wont ever.’‘ Your voice cracks on the last sentence and you an feel the lump in your throat become sore.

He bites his lip unsure of what to say next. Those words had hit him good inside. ‘‘ Im sorry. I truly am. But you know the reason why we had to end it. I fucked up bad and the media was making the scandal bigger and messier day by day. It was better to just call it off.’‘

One by one your tears start to drop. You nose begins it’s running trip but you sniffle it back up.

‘‘ You could of denied it. You know you could of made a statement and denied it. But you felt something for her didn’t you? Didn’t you?’‘ You semi-yell, sobs already starting to take it’s way over.

He bites his lip once again and ruffles his fingers through his hair, “ Baby..’’

You wipe your tears with your hands making your face even more puffy from the crying. “ I am jealous. I am I admit it Jimin. But do you know i have been suffering for one year and two months? I can’t sleep at night because im so used to your touch at night. I look at every couple in Seoul and think to myself, Dang they seem so happy. What’s their secret?’’

Jimin sits up, making eye contact with you with tears welling up into his eyes. It hurt’s you more than yourself to see him crying. It always has.

‘‘ Please don’t do that. Don’t do this to yourself. Please get help from someone to try and move on. Please. I don’t like to see or hear you make yourself suffer.’ He begs, getting up from his seat and coming towards you.

Jimin sits next to you, hesitantly opening his arms up to you. Would it be wrong to embrace him? He’s being too sincere, but thats what you want right? You decide to just do it, and lean into him only for him to pull you in closer into his chest.You just lay there crying and sobbing while he runs his fingers through your hair. You shouldn’t be doing this. He has a girlfriend. But it feels so right.

‘‘ What does she have that I don’t? Why couldn’t you love me the same way you love her “ You cry into his chest, soaking his shirt with your tears.

You’d been waiting for this moment to just let it out. Let everything out.

‘’ Please don’t make this harder than what it is right now. Just try and forget me and move on. Please.” Hypocritcal. How does he expect you to get over him when he’s the one whos holding you so tight right now. Soon enough his sniffles join yours in harmony.

You raise your head up and look him deep into the eyes while you wipe away his tears, “ Don’t cry Jimin. I’m the one supposed to be crying over you. Don’t cry.’’

He takes your hand away from his face and wraps his fist ontop of yours, “Please promise me you will move on okay?’’

You shake your head no, “ I can’t make that promise.”

He doesn’t say anything. He gently cradles you in his arms and lifts you up. You don’t think to where he is going. You just close your eyes and grab onto his shirt firmly not wanting to let go.

Soon enough you feel the cold sheets over your bed. He covers you in the duvet and leans down to your forehead. A kiss. Your fist is still locked onto his shirt in which he tries to pry it away but you don’t want to let him go. He sighs and raises his arms up as he takes off the shirt revealing an extra plain white wife beater under it. Taking your other hand, he wraps your hand into another fist onto the shirt to where both of your hands are holding onto it.

‘‘ Please better yourself for me baby. Sleep and eat well. “

Is all he says before turning off the lights and walking out your bedroom door. You can hear him putting on and zipping up his heavy coat but you just don’t make a sound.

The apartment door clicks and beeps letting you know he’s already gone.

333 notes · View notes

solarwonux · 3 years

Text

Wildflower || Lee Chan

chan x f!reader

w.c: 3.0k

warnings: smut, thigh riding, car sex, drinking, mentions of weed

note: another repost aaaa I’m sorry but good news my semester had ended so now I can finally sit down and write. Anyway, enjoy let me know your thoughts

p.s listen to wildflower by 5sos while reading this if you’d like.

p.p.s my requests are open so if you’d like one send them in hehe,xx

masterlist

The flames of the campfire burned making your eyes sting in discomfort. You blinked rapidly trying to regain the moisture back in your eyes but your efforts were deemed as unsuccessful. You sighed, placing your head on top of Chan’s shoulder, feeling him shake as he laughed at something Jun had said. The arm that was securely wrapped around you got tighter, making the butterflies in your stomach erupt, just like they did everytime you were in his presence.

“You okay?” He glazed over at you, his cheeks flushed pink from the wine he had been indulging in all throughout the night. “I’m fine, my eyes are just a little dry.” You assured him, giving him a slight nod of the head. “I have some eye drops in my car if you want them.”

“God, yes please.”

Chan grinned and leaned down. He placed a soft kiss against your forehead before turning to face his friends, who had started poking fun at Chan, making all sorts of childish remarks. Chan rolled his eyes and grabbed a twig from the ground before throwing it at Soonyoung who was making kissy faces at the two of you like a five year old.

“You guys are so annoying.” He chuckled. He removed the blanket he had placed over the two of you. The cool wind of the ocean breeze hitting your arms making you shiver slightly. “Sometimes you just make it so easy for us.” Jeonghan said pointedly tilting his cup of wine in the direction you two were sitting in before bringing it up to his rosy lips and chugging it down.

“Whatever, we’re going.” Chan stood up and threw the blanket onto Joshua’s lap, who’s face lit up as he rushed to cover his body with the thin wool. “We’ll be back in like ten minutes.” He pulled you up by your arms gently and pecked your lips once you were at eye level with him.

“Ten minutes huh, so you’re like a hit it and quit it type of guy.” Jeonghan joked, sending the rest of the boys into fits of uncontrollable laughter. “We’re going to my car to get eye drops…I really hate all of you.” Chan groaned, pulling on your arm, silently asking you to follow him and get away from your friends as fast as possible. You trailed behind him laughing, listening to how they now decided to take it upon themselves and gossip about yours and Chan’s sex life. Each one making insane claims, only making Chan’s steps get faster causing him to trip every few steps due to the sinking sand surrounding your bare feet.

“I bet getting eye drops is like code for sex now a days.”

It was unclear, in your wine filled haze, how the two of you went from desperately searching for eye drops to now making out in the back seat of his car.

Eye drops.

That was the only purpose of your trip to the nearly empty parking lot. But when he couldn’t find them mumbling curses as he tore his car apart, finally realizing that Vernon had probably taken them after they had smoked a week ago. He gave up, staying silent for a few seconds before pulling you into the back seat. One you had familiarized yourself with after years of dating and sneaking around. Your scent etched in between the cracks of the old leather seats, a thought that always managed to turn your insides into mush.

“Mmm…we should go back.” You mumbled clinging onto Chan as you pushed his head further into your neck. He hummed nodding his head slightly as he desperately sucked a love bite onto the skin of your collar bone. “We should, but I don’t want to.” He raised his head, smirking, hooking his thumbs around your belt loops and pulling you onto his lap. “I have a few propositions for you.” He smirked and brought your shirt over your head revealing the white lace of your bra. “So innocent.” His fingers delicately traced along the lace detailing, as you waited for his so-called propositions or genius ideas as he sometimes liked to call them.

“Why don’t we try that thing you mentioned the other day over lunch last week?” He raised his eyebrows suggestively and if your body wasn’t already feeling hot due to the alcohol coursing through your veins. The memory of your lunch date last Monday would’ve surely done it. “Here. Where we can get caught by our friends or worse the police?”

“That’s what makes it more exciting.” He winked and unbuttoned your shorts. His fingers teasing the seam of your matching panties waiting for your go ahead. It made your heart sore knowing that after years of dating he still waited for your approval. “Fuck it let’s do it.” You raised your body and brought down your shorts, hitting the back of your head in the process causing a loud laugh to erupt from Chan’s lips.

“Stop laughing and help me.”

“What did you want me to do? Look at you like you’ve sprung a third head?” He helped you take them off and threw them over the front seat. “You’re right I prefer you laughing.” You nodded before straddling his thigh and hooking your arms around his neck. He hummed and placed an arm underneath his head smugly before grabbing hold of your hip with his other one.

“Go on baby girl, I’m giving a free pass to get off on my thigh.”

“Like I need a pass anyway.”

“Hmm…I guess you’re right. I succumb to you in every possible way. All you have to do is open your mouth and ask.” Chan brought his arm down again before reaching over and placing his thumb against your bottom lip. He tugged on it making you open your mouth before inserting it, your tongue swirling around the calloused digit making him groan. “I miss seeing your mouth around me but I guess that can wait, now move baby.” He gave your hip a light tap before inserting his hand in between the waistband of your panties and groping your ass cheek.

You opened your mouth in an inaudible moan, his thumb falling out of your lips and onto your chin painting it with your saliva. You moved your hips experimentally, testing the waters scared that the fantasy you had been creating in your head wouldn’t be as pleasurable as you had pictured. Only to be proved wrong when the friction of his bare thigh against your panty clothed core sent a jolt of pleasure through your body.

“Back to my propositions. If you can come undone on just my thigh, I promise I’ll fuck you until your seeing stars.”

Chan snickered watching your face contort in blissful pleasure as you started to confidently move your hips. He nosed at your neck before licking a strip up the shell of your ear making you whimper. “Does this make you feel good?” He teased, a smirk evident in his voice as he bounced his leg up. A choked moan escaping your chapped lips joining the heat in the air, while you shamelessly started to grind down on his thigh.

“G-God this is better than I imagined.” You threw your head back resting it on the seat in front of you. “I don’t know what’s better, hearing you say you’ve imagined this or watching it happen in front of me.” His bottom lip found its way in between his teeth. He clawed at your hips guiding you into a steady rhythm before taking his free hand and inserting it in the front of panties making you gasp.. He guides his fingers lower, gathering your slick before taking them out and bringing them up to his lips, lapping them sensually while you watched with hooded eyes.

“I want to feel you inside me, please.” You sat up and tugged at his shirt before bringing it over his head. “Please baby I want to feel full.” You dug your nails into his chest feeling the tension build up in the pit of your stomach.

“You will, once you come.” He wrapped his arms around your waist and pulled you close. He kissed your cheek before undoing the clasp of your bra, letting the straps fall down your shoulders. “It’s amazing how I don’t have to do anything for you to fall apart.” He boosted, taking your earlobe in between his teeth. You moaned out loudly as he started bouncing his leg and pushing you down on him even further.

“Let go for me baby.” He whispered in your ear before leaving open mouthed kisses down your neck. He bit down on your collar bone making you cry out as your body shook. Your orgasm washed over you in waves, sighing out his name. Chan let out a satisfied hum as he held your body close, whispering sweet nothings in your ear. You panted as your head fell in the crock of his neck. You sighed happily and ran your hand down his toned stomach, playing with the knot of his swimming trunks.

“That was the hottest thing ever love, we should do it more often.”

If there was one thing you would never complain about regarding your boyfriend was the fact that he always kept true to his promises. But if there was one thing that you could complain about was how truly evil he was when it came to giving you what you wanted.

You hated it.

“Channie stop fucking around and just get on with it.” You groaned as he pressed the head of his cock on your clit.

“Patience is a virtue honey.”

“Well my patience is wearing thin, if we take any longer the guys are going to come looking for us.” You arched your back as he ran his cock down your pussy lips, making you clench over nothing. He pulled back and spread your arousal along with his precum over his angry head, giving himself a few tugs before positioning himself at your entrance again.

“Frankly I am a little offended that you’re thinking about other men, while we’re in such a compromising position.” Chan says as he slowly starts to push in, your heat taking him and wrapping around him deliciously. Even after years of dating he still had such an overwhelming effect on you and he knew that. It made his chest swell up with pride knowing he was the only one that could make you feel the way he did.

“You always take me so well, always so tight. It’s like you’re made for me sweetheart.” He groaned once he was fully sheathed inside of you. Chan leaned down and captured your lips with his, swallowing your whimpers as he slowly started moving. He kept his pace, giving you time to adjust to him knowing fully well that it had been awhile since the two of you had had some alone time.

“B-Baby…f-fuck. You can move a little more.” You mumbled against his lips, clinging onto him. Your nails blissfully digging into his shoulder blades making him moan. He picked up his pace, his mouth trailing down the navel of your breasts, mumbling sweet sinful phrases, etching them into your skin. You arched your back, pushing yourself further into his mouth as he started hitting the mushy soft spot inside of you. Impressed that he had wasted no time in finding it, proving to you once again that he knew your body as if it were his second skin.

“Angel please let me cum inside of you.” He begged his kisses on your skin getting more desperate as well as his thrusts, causing the little coil of pleasure to form in the pit of your stomach. And as much as you didn’t want this moment to end, to stay underneath him in the cramped back seat of his car. To beg him to make you come undone over and over until your body couldn’t handle it anymore. You knew you couldn’t. It had been well over ten minutes.

“Hmm…are you sure?” You placed both of your hands on either side of his head pulling him off your nipple. The loss of his mouth disappoints you but you need to see his face. Needed to see the pleasure he was feeling painted over his perfect features. “Are we ready for that?” You let out a whimper as his thrusts got slower yet harder, making it a point for you to really feel him inside you. To take in how the head of his cock hit your g-spot. To feel the ridges and his veins pulsing against your soft velvety walls, indicating that he was starting to get close.

“More than ready…p-please I want to fill you up with my cum.” He begged resting his forehead against yours, his mouth opened with pleasure. His hot alcohol induced breath fanning your face making chills run down your spin. You nodded, your whimpers getting more desperate as he started to rub his thumb along your clit in moderate circles. The pressure increased as the two of you desperately started to chase your highs. The heat of his car wrapping like a blanket around the two of you making the intensity of the moment even higher.

It made you feel as if the two of you were back in high school and sneaking around with one another. Making out in the same seats during lunch time choosing each other rather than your food. It brought back memories of all the nights underneath the stars at the abandoned football field, listening to him spew random facts about space. And the first night the two of you made love to one another by the lake on a raggedy old blanket his grandma had given him for the holiday season. It was overwhelming to have him this close to you always. To feel him and every inch of his body knowing very well you were the only one that was able to make him come undone the way he always did. And it sent you to the moon.

“C-Channie I’m close.” You breathed out. Your hands moved down his back, pushing him deeper into you. Trying your hardest to feel him closer than what he already was. He moaned out your name like a prayer, his thumb on your clit getting faster as well as his deep thrusts. The dam that had been kept away broke and you felt your orgasm crash harder than before.

“F-Fuck me.” Chan moaned his head falling into your neck as he came undone, painting your walls with his sticky substance. He thrusted into you a bit more, your walls milking him out as he mumbled sweet praises against the shell of your ear.

“I already did.” You joked, a low laugh escaping his lungs as your chests heaved against one another. “I have a proposition for you now.” You whispered snaking your hand up his back and resting it against the back of his head.

“Okay, what is it?”

“We should do that more often.” You giggled. He raised his head giving you a smug look before cupping your chin and bringing it up so his lips were hovering over yours. “How about a round two and we call it a night.” He proposed giving you a chaste kiss before rubbing his nose against yours.

“I think that’s the greatest idea you’ve had all day.”

Chan held onto your hand tightly as the two of you slowly made your way back to the beach camp. Your body was exhausted and you could tell Chan’s was also. Which made you laugh as sometimes the two of you liked to think you had the same stamina you had when you were younger. Each time you were proved wrong but neither of you liked to admit it.

“Finally, we were starting to think you guys got kidnapped.” Seokmin said as he leaned forward roasting a marshmallow.

“To be fair DK and Hoshi were the only ones that thought that. The rest of us knew exactly what was going on.” Vernon spoke, taking a bite out of his s’more, groaning in disappointment when the melted marshmallow fell out of the confinements of the cracker and onto his chin.

“We were looking for eye drops, which by the way I know you took.” Chan sat down on one of the empty lounge chairs. He pulled your arm gently before circling them around your waist and bringing you down onto his lap. You smiled shaking your head as the lewd comments started to filter in.

“I knew that was code for sex.”

“No it’s code for actually looking for eye drops.” Chan gazed over at you. “Right baby?” He sent you a playfully wink making you laugh. No matter what came out of your mouth next, the teasing would never stop. And you knew they would be bringing up the eye drop story as they were now deeming it, until the day you took your last breath. So you shook your head and gave Chan a quick peck before turning to face your friends.

“Chan’s right we were just looking for eye drops.”

#dino smut #chan smut #seventeen smut #svt smut #dino scenarios #dino imagines #seventeen imagines #svt imagines #seventeen scenarios #svt scenarios #seventeen x reader #svt fanfiction #chan scenarios #chan imagines #lee chan #dino

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shanitani · 3 years

Note

Bakugou x reader jealousy head canon where he gets jealous of your relationship with Shinsou please?

contains: bakugou x fem reader¡

includes: fluff, very little angst

a: I didn’t know if you meant like friendship with shinsou or actual relationship so I did friendship I hope that’s okay <33 also I really hate how I drafted this my writing is terrible I’m sorry I wish I made this better but I’m not sure how to- anyways.

He would be pissed

Bakugou is definitely not one who would hold it in but he also doesn’t want to ADMIT he’s jealous because um?? figure it out yourself.

Shinsou is so touchy though, and you just let him... Bakugou hates every second of it

But he does wanna grab your attention a bit more and is willing to go by his morals a little bit.

He loves to place first in anything, so he’s surely not gonna loose to someone like shinsou.

Even though bakugou and shinsou are the exact opposite, it doesn’t matter to him. He knows you’re to perfect fit for him and the only person he’s willing to have.

sooo the moment he seen you and shinsou together after a big practice fight with class 1A and 1B, he gave you a hug and told you how well you did. It made Bakugou so angry, why wasn’t it him hugging you and expressing how amazing you were even though it was a practice fight?

Why out of all people did you pick Shinsou to be friends with and hang out with everyday? there’s nothing exciting about him at all.

Something in Bakugou slightly hit his nerves, he doesn’t even know how he led himself to your door.

But now he’s there

Bakugou paused at your doorstep, reflecting on what he was really doing - allowing all of his morals and pride to seep right through him right when he knocked at your door.

“Embarrasing” he muttered to himself looking at his shoes, he thought about it for a while before eagerly shaking the thoughts away. He came this far for you; he can’t back down now.

with unsteady shaky hands Bakugou slightly banged onto the door causing you to look up from your homework in fear of the loud noise.

“Coming!” you dragged your legs to the door quite quickly - thinking it was an emergency or Aizawa having to tell you something important, perhaps even Shinsou - but to your surprise, stood Bakugou. Red flushed his face but he still had his similar frown and glareful eyes.

“It took you long enough” he sounded mad as usual, but had this off persona to him. “I just wanted to tell you good job, today.”

You barely knew how to respond, you both rarely talked and here he was at your dorm telling you good job - you hadn’t even realized he had been watching you all this time.

“I really wasn’t all that great but thank you, I could learn a lot coming from you.” You smiled looking up at Bakugou, who had his mouth open ready to speak, but instead just sighed and leaned on your door frame,

“Why do you hang out with that guy-” Bakugou stopped himself, wide eyed at how blunt he just spat out the question, it had aswell caught you by surprise. “What do you mean?” you opened the door all the way to see Bakugou fully, you observed the way he fidgeted with his fingertips and how he looked anxious for a response; however he didn’t know how to put it into words.

“Why do you hang around Shinsou? I mean he’s not amazing-” “like you.” you finished his sentence smiling at the pure jealousy Bakugou obviously leaked - You could read his face like a book and it was adorable how he was trying to show that he was interested in you and jealous of Shinsou.

“ I just think you should hang around me is all” he muttered stuffing his hands into his pockets to stop the unintentional fidgeting. “How about right now?” you grabbed his hand leading you into your dorm room smiling.

“That can work too.” You could barely tell - because it’s Bakugou, but you could’ve swore you saw him smile for a second.

masterlist

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unprofessional-bard · 3 years

Text

Chapter 12 - The Development, Pt. II

Unprofessional Bard's Masterlist

Losing My Religion Series Masterlist

Previous Chapter • Next Chapter

Pairing: Joel Miller x Female!Reader/OC

Warnings: TW!!! Mentions of depression/anxiety, lack of appetite and suicide; jealousy (the reader is Angry™️); talks of (unwanted) pregnancy and miscarriage (cult activities).

Summary: Who would've thought a dinner and a bouquet of flowers would ever bare bad omens?

Word Count: 5.588

Author's Note: I apologise for the repost! I forgot to do my taglist + the tags didn't work for me so let me try this again. This is a whole chunk of angst and nothing more. I'm sorry about this but it is going to get darker :')

Enjoy!

gif credit: winterswake

"Oof, this wasn't your greatest idea, you know that right?" You sighed anxiously, hands on your hips.

"I've done many things that weren't so great, sweetpea," Joel wiped his wet hands on the cute little apron around his waist after he put the vegetables he had cut into the bowl which was on the counter next to the cutting board: "We both know it, but this totally ain't one of 'em."

He carried another bowl to the dining room where you stood, gave your exposed neck a brief kiss as he passed by. Kiki and Ward were going to arrive anytime now for Joel's infamous dinner plan. When he put the bowl down, he scanned the table with a puzzled expression: "Why are there two more plates?"

You leaned your weight on one leg as you grabbed the edges of the chair, which stood at the head of the table: "I... invited Tommy and Maria over, too–"

Joel's expression made you feel guilty: "(Y/N)."

"What?" You spoke defensively, a nervous expression on your face and tone to your voice. "It was going to be awkward as shit otherwise."

"You don't know that," He growled. "Not when you pull stunts like this."

"I don't care," You emphasised each word, exhaustion present in your stance. "Better safe than sorry, Joel."

He nodded disapprovingly and walked back to the kitchen as you stood there, your head hanging with a sigh. You slowly raised it up, hands on your hips again, then turned your head to the side just enough for him to hear you over the sound of the steamer: "I'm sorry."

"No, you're not," He said when he walked past you, carrying the last piece of dish to the table. His anger wasn't for nothing, you accepted what you did was an ass move.

"You're right." You huffed, which made him look at you. "I'm not sorry for inviting Tommy and Maria over, but I am sorry for upsetting you."

His tense stance eased slowly at your words, then he proceeded to mirror your chair holding pose, huffing quietly: "Well, one of us is gon' have to eat less, I'm more worried about that."

"I'll gladly volunteer, I lost my appetite." You rubbed your eyes, which sported dark circles underneath them– which worried Joel.

He stepped closer to you, reaching for your hip with his dominant hand and began rubbing soothing circles there: "No. You eat. Don't think for a second I didn't notice how you started eatin' less." This whole ordeal was getting to you more than you cared to admit. It had been eight days since your decision to arrange dinner with them, but it clearly didn't escape Joel's notice. You looked down, ashamed, running a hand through your hair nervously: "Hey, look at me," Joel gently took your chin between his fingers and lifted your head up, his nose inches away from yours. The three knocks on your door didn't stop him from saying: "You're worryin' over nothin', sweetheart. It's gonna be alright."

"We'll see," You looked into his eyes with a blank stare, gulping, giving his hand a light squeeze before walking to the door, collecting yourself in the meantime. From the small windows on the door, it wasn't hard to tell the brunette couple had arrived. You took a deep breath as you opened the door with a sincere smile: "Hello there– Come in, welcome."

"Hi!" Kiki grinned and Ward just offered an awkward resemblance of a smile.

After escorting them to the living room, you spoke: "Joel's getting finished in the kitchen, then we can have dinner."

"Joel's cooking?" Kiki gave you an alien look. It wasn't a my goodness what a man I bet he cooks real fine tone, but more a genuinely confused one.

"Uhm, yes?" You lightly flinched but smiled still, equally confused at her question. Giving a brief look at Ward, you noticed how he was staring hard at her and she was pointedly ignoring him. "Don't worry, he actually cooks better than me... haha."

You stared into each other's eyes for five seconds, both of your irises reflecting a pair of question marks at each other, then she let out an odd laugh: "Oh! If you say so... What a beautiful garden you got– Lots of flowers."

"Why, thank you," You smiled a little nervously. "I like taking care of flowers and plants..."

"Oh really? I do– did too, once upon a time..." Kiki did an exaggerated smiley face. "I should bring you some, then!"

"That's very kind of you," You felt yourself soften a little at her words. "Well, how have you both been? Feeling like you two are fitting in? I hope people aren't giving you trouble."

"Oh," Kiki looked at Ward for the first time, who's gaze was focused on you now. "No, I think we started to fit in better–" Ward nodded in agreement, his head turning in her direction: "Gets better every day."

"That's good news," You quietly huffed out a breath of relief, nodding at her words, which was when Joel walked in to greet them, and also when there was another pair of knocks on the door. This time, thank God, it was Tommy and Maria.

The dinner went without a hitch, to say the least. Although it had it's awkward moments, Tommy and Maria always picked it up one way or another. Delicious meals were eaten and wines from your collection with Joel were opened– it was pleasant to a certain degree. You and Joel sat across each other on the other ends of the table, Maria and Tommy sat to your left while Kiki and Ward sat to your right. Kiki was seated by your side, but she mostly had her attention on your husband. She didn't drink, but Ward did, and after his second glass, he seemed to relax more.

When it was time to carry all the plates back to where they came from, Joel and you carried the first party. When you placed them in the sink, and he on the counter, he softly grabbed your hand: "See? Wasn't that bad, was it?"

It sort of was, for you anyway, as much as you tried to calm your nerves with the wine: "Thanks to Tommy and Maria, yeah." Joel sighed through his nose and looked away for a moment: "What?"

"We'll talk about it in the morning." Joel let your hand go, but didn't move away.

"What is there to talk about?" You spoke, frustrated, your arms opening slightly in a gesture. Right then, your eyes moved over his shoulder to the doorway. He turned around to see it was Maria with two of the rect platters in her hands.

"Joel, why don't you go back? (Y/N) and I'll handle it from here." She spoke as she walked over to where you two were, then placed the platters on the counter. He gave you one last look before nodding and walking back inside. As soon as he left, Maria stood very close to you and turned on the water: "You wanna tell me what's going on with you?"

"Not really," You quickly started to wash the plates and she helped with the leftovers.

"(Y/N)," Maria spoke more seriously. "There's obviously something wrong–"

"I didn't say there wasn't, I just don't wanna talk about it right now." You said, turning your head to her a little but not looking her in the eyes. "Please, Maria, I appreciate you and your concern, but–"

"Mind if I help?" Kiki suddenly appeared with more service in her hands, startling you both.

"Not at all," Maria replied in your stead. "I'll leave you two to it, I need to use the bathroom."

You closed your eyes, exhausted, then begged for patience as Kiki replaced Maria's place next to you. She kept a distance, which you also appreciated. After a brief moment of silence, she spoke: "The food was delicious, I'm surprised Joel helped you prepare all of this."

You tried– God knows your tried not to look for a double meaning behind her words, but you failed: "Well, as I said, he cooks better than me."

"No, I mean, he just really helps you around, y'know? Serving, preparing, cleaning..."

You turned to face her, closing the sink, and took a proper look at her: "What's so weird about it? We're partners– Married– There's no helping out, we do it together, as it should be."

"Oh, don't get me wrong," She said after a while, her smile unsettling. "It's just that, I always do the cooking, and preparing, and cleaning. That's what I was taught, while Ward..."

You bit down on your tongue hard as you finally understood what she was getting at, the realisation making you blink once and long, then look away. A silent oh left your lips while you thought about how to respond, forcing a small smile to your lips: "Well... Uh– Why don't you go back, I'll take it from here."

"Are you sure?"

"Yeah, I got this, you're our guest, after all."

She smiled and nodded, heading back. As soon as she turned around you let out a silent, heavy breath, looking a little bewildered and disturbed at the things she had said. You stood still for a few moments, then ultimately decided to wash your face, so you took it up to the bathroom.

When you woke up the next morning, you had a mild headache from the wine, no doubt. Joel was nowhere to be found, which had you worried for a second, then you realised it was near noon. After washing your face, you dragged yourself downstairs and once you made it to the kitchen, you found Tommy, Eugene and Joel sitting quietly at the table.

"Mornin' princess," Eugene grinned at you, a cup in his hand. Joel and Tommy had more serious, even a little worried looks on their faces.

"Hey," You waved at them and dragged your feet to the cupboard where you kept your coffee, only to find you had ran out of the beans.

"How're you feelin'?"

"I'm fine... What kinda question is that?" You chuckled.

The brothers shared a brief look before Tommy slowly got up, walked towards the island counter and leaned against it with his elbows: "Listen, (Y/N), we're all a bit worried about you."

"I'm not!" Eugene said clearly. "I mean, I am, but not in the way they are– What's going on with you and the newcomers?"

You stared at the brothers, hard, then turned to Joel: "Is this the new town gossip, then?"

He huffed, crossed his arms across his chest and leaned back in his seat: "It ain't nothin'. We were talking about last night," He gestured between himself and Tommy. "Eugene overheard, expressed his own worries 'bout them and wanted to talk to you."

You felt so exposed –out in the open– with the spotlight moving onto you once more. Your eyebrows furrowed as Joel held your gaze for a while, the other men too scared to interfere; until Eugene spoke: "Look, (Y/N), I get what worries you, even if these two bimbos will say there's nothing wrong. I'm here to vouch for ya."

"Thanks," You shrugged and nodded. You felt embarrassed at the three pairs of eyes waiting for a response from you– speaking to Eugene alone about what actually worried you would've made you feel much better, but you just told them about the interactions between you and Kiki. The more you spoke, the more frustrated you got, which ironically made you close up more.

"Which reminds me," He said some time after you mentioned her offer to bring you a flower. "Do you have, uh, mugwort in your garden?"

The abrupt change of topic caught you off guard, but you still said yes, I think so and walked out from the back door, the old man tailing you. The sun immediately burned down on your skin, but a gentle breeze lightened the load on your shoulders as it accompanied you to the edge of the garden.

"Look, I don't actually need mugwort," He said when you sat down on your knees. "If you wanna say something to me that you think they won't understand, now's your chance."

You moved on with your digging quietly while he waited, then finally, without looking at him and venom dripping from every word you spoke, you sighed: "Kiki has eyes for Joel."

Eugene coughed loudly at your cold words, a hand on his chest: "Shit, (Y/N)..."

"Everyone, including Joel, seems oblivious to this– I'll probably get accused of petty jealousy if I tell them, but since you've had your fair share of weird run-ins with her, I think you should know."

He remained quiet for awhile as you worked with the plant, then finally huffed: "That's not a jealous face from what I can see, it's the face of a woman who's sensing something's gonna go wrong."

You finally looked up at him, your cold expression turned soft because of his sympathy, then looked back down: "I'm losing sleep over some stupid– bitch– God, I was... I've been trying to convince myself that it's nothing, but–"

"It's not nothing, (Y/N)." Eugene spoke firmly, grabbing your shoulder and giving it a reassuring squeeze. "Something's clearly not right with those two, and you've a right to get worried, 'cause I'm guessing it's not just Joel you're worried about."

You gulped, wiped some sweat off the corner of your brow with your wrist, then nodded.

"Well," He took the plants from your hands. "Thanks for this, and, just know that you're not alone. If you ever wanna talk more about this, you know where to find me. Don't be a stranger."

You did pay Eugene a visit a few days later to talk more about them. You felt more comfortable talking to him alone, and you were talking to him because you didn't want to add more to Joel's tension and strain your relationship again. It also felt good to just talk about the whole thing and have someone who understood you.

You had told him that you had no doubts about Joel's intentions, but about Kiki's and hers alone. He had told you he understood and told you that his door was always open if you needed to talk again, so you went to him a second time in a cool afternoon after Kiki had appeared out of nowhere.

"Flowers! As promised!" She smiled brightly, giving you a tiny bouquet of mixed, yellow flowers.

"Oh, wow," You carefully took the bouquet from her, smiling at the sight and feeling genuinely happy for a moment that she actually did something like this. "Thank you, Kiki."

"Don't mention it," She smiled sincerely and initiated smalltalk, then went about her business. After you closed the door, however, reality came crashing down.

You went to see Eugene then: He had just returned from patrol, so the moment you saw him, you grabbed him and went back to your house. A very old book you owned, The Meanings of Flowers, laid on the dinner table while you sat at the head of the table again, the older man to your right. Beautiful flowers rested above the book, a pair of each: Carnation, hyacinth, marigold, rose and tansy. You already knew the names of the most thanks to your free time activities, so finding them in the book wasn't particularly hard.

"Damn, (Y/N), you're really gettin' into this, aren't you?" Eugene said when you first explained and laid the flowers in front of him as he sat down.

You read through the pages and sat across him. "I think... I have, uh– What if she's asking for help?"

"How do you mean?" He gave you a look, and when you stared at him a while, he slowly got what you were saying. "You... think that too?"

"It's so obvious," You sighed, a sad expression on your face. "It's the only logical explanation for the way she responds to physical touch. There's more to it than what Ward told me about their past."

"You're right," He huffed, troubled. "Alright, let's see what carnation means."

"Each colour represents something different, but yellow..." What you read made you tense up.

"What?"

"Disdain."

You gave each other a look, then you continued to other flowers: "Hyacinth– Yellow hyacinth is... jealousy."

"Do these even grow in Wyoming?" Eugene was as disturbed as you were. You just shrugged, but you were thinking more about how she came to find these in the first place.

"Marigold– Jealousy, despair... Rose, yellow– Jealousy and..." You gasped shortly, eyes widening at the word.

"What, what is it?" Eugene turned the book to himself a little and his eyes widened slightly as well.

Infidelity.

"Maybe... Maybe tansy means something else?" Eugene flipped the pages as you burned a hole through the table, stunned where you sat. "Hostile thoughts, declaring war... Shit."

He stared at you as you slowly raised your head up and gave him a nasty look, whispering angrily: "Who... Who does she think she is?"

"(Y/N), I– I don't," Eugene knew, like yourself, that this could've been just pure coincidence, but all of the flowers representing almost exactly the same things inevitably had him worried and at a loss for words.

"That little bitch–" Your fists flexed into a fist, your brows drawing together, creating deep lines on your forehead.

"Don't freak out," Eugene grabbed your elbow in a calming gesture.

"She wants him–? She wants a war? I'll give her something worse, she'll regret ever setting foot in–"

"What's going on?" In between your heartbeat ringing in your ear and loud, angry words, you didn't hear Joel come in. Your head snapped towards him, eyes wide open and angry, then turned your head away towards Eugene.

"I think it's best if you sit down." The older man said uncomfortably.

He obliged, never looking away from you as he did. He was clearly worried, careful, but also cross; it wasn't hard to tell, and you had hoped he wouldn't see what you were up to, but alas...

"You know who brought me these?" You asked, focused at something outside the window.

"I have an idea." His eyes were burning through the side of your face, the tension crushing everyone in the room.

You chuckled bitterly. "You must think I'm crazy."

"I think no such thing," He growled, offended by your accusation. "You don't sleep well, you don't eat– Your worryin's making me worry!"

"The thing is, Joel," Eugene intervened. "She has a right to worry."

He finally looked at him with an exhausted expression: "What?"

"Each of these flowers have meanings in this book right here," He tapped the book. "And they're not good meanings at all."

"See? This is what worries me," He leaned back, crossing his arms. "You're gonna check everything she does or gives?"

"So you want me to stay oblivious to– to things, while Ward is probably physically absuing his wife?" You snapped, your head turning in Joel's direction to meet his quizzical expression. You got up from your chair, leaning in with your hands on the table: "If she was meaning to send a message to us with these flowers, asking for help, and we ignored it? That'd be on me."

"How could it possibly be on you?" He replied angrily. "How would she know that you'd– decipher this message?"

"I told you that I told her about–"

"Enough!" Eugene growled. "She sent her a message, despite what could be happening in their household." You sighed heavily and turned your head to the side, Joel glancing at Eugene as he continued: "All these flowers have one thing in common, Joel, and it's that they've bad meanings. This one?" He held up the marigold: "Jealousy. This one?" The hyacinth: "Also jealousy. And this?" The rose: "Jealousy... as well as infidelity."

Joel leaned back, an irked look on his face: "Wh– What?"

"Tansy– Hostile thoughts." He coughed into his fist as he put the flower down.

"So don't sit there–" You looked at him again, leaning in with your head: "And tell me that I'm worrying over nothing. Just because you have no clue about what's going on around you, doesn't mean it's not happening." You gulped, the barbed wire around your throat present once more, then picked up the book and closed it: "Thanks, Eugene."

He just nodded with a concerned look on his face and watched you walk upstairs. Joel, stunned in place, didn't say a word as the older man got up, tipped his head at him and left. He sat there for some time, by himself and stared at the beautiful flowers. He hadn't seen you like this since the Axel case– sure, you both had ups and downs but it had never gotten this bad since then. To prevent another fall out, he knew this time he had to be a little more alert for both of your sakes, if your accusations were indeed true.

But you both needed to co-operate if something was going to be done about this.

It was close to a week later when Ward opened up again.

Joel and you were a bit tense, even after when he suggested the next day after the flower incident that you both went to Maria to change your patrol schedules. She had said Joel only had one more patrol left with Kiki, while you still had three to go with Ward, which was okay for you especially after you found out that Joel's last patrol with Kiki was a group sweep which involved you too.

Joel was more than relieved too, thinking maybe change of patrol partners will finally ease the tension between you and him, but it seemed you'd remain upset until that last patrol was over with, which was the day after your current patrol with Ward.

You were taking a different route this time, on horseback and it was in the afternoon, a chill breeze was present which took the burning feel of the slowly setting sun off your shoulders. The trees were offering shield from the sun with their shadows, too.

"I overheard people talking about you and Joel."

"Really?" You rolled your eyes. "What were they saying?"

"Something about... having a child."

You turned your head and gave him a stern look, but it wasn't directed at him, then you sighed, the grip you had on your reigns tightening: "It's none of their business."

"Exactly what I told them."

"What?" You turned to face him again, the whip of your head smoother than before, and your voice was softer– surprised.

"I told them to stop talking about something which wasn't their business," Ward casually explained. "They then told me that I had no business listening to them, so I threatened to break their jaw if they didn't shut up."

"Ward..." You gave him a look of disapproval.

"Kidding," He offered a small smile. "Leave out the threatening bit, but it did cause a little argument. Maria was there though... organising this event that's coming up. She defended you, too."

You hadn't taken him to be the type to stand up for people he didn't exactly know: "Ward I–"

"Sorry though, don't know who they were–"

"Thank you."

He blinked, equally surprised at the smallest smile on your lips: "Oh, well..."

"Not many people would do that, I appreciate it," Your grip loosened and you allowed yourself to relax a little. "People tend to get ahead of themselves sometimes."

"Inconsiderate, that's what they are." He growled, but his face was thoughtful and troubled exactly like when he told you of his background. "It just– Gets on my nerves. This whole... baby talk."

"You and mine both," You huffed. "It's just funny how people who have almost no connections to me and Joel talk about it, when him and I haven't even put it out on the table yet." It was true. Neither of you had even said the word out of its nickname context.

"I just hope they won't force you to have one."

You turned your head to him with slightly wide eyes: "How do you mean?"

He remained quiet for a while, probably debating on whether he should share what he meant or not – if he should listen to his needs and get it off his chest, or add more to the bottle when there was no space left in it. He finally spoke: "Kiki had to lie, so that they wouldn't separate or punish us. I was too... paralysed to speak when she said We want to have children out of nowhere. Said that it was the only reason why we decided to date and get married. We had been together for just five months."

A sick lie to get out of an equally sick situation, which normally would've made you feel sick, but in this fucked up world and having done the equally fucked up shit you did, you couldn't bring yourself to feel nauseous; however, it did make a shiver run down your spine, the situation reminding you of the Seraphites in Seattle when an escapee had arrived in Boston, months after the fall of that QZ. She had told horrifying stories about how her and five other people had barely made it past them: They had witnessed 'religious sacrifice's, and the manslaughter from The WLF hadn't helped their case either... She had committed suicide a month after her arrival in Boston.

"By then we started to regret our decision more, because they were forcing us to– To have a child–"

"Hey, look, you don't have to tell me–"

"We lied–" He continued, feeling though as if he wasn't going to get another chance to open up again. "For a long time, it was maybe we're not lucky enough, or God's not willing. They... They went as far as to consider fucking exorcism, and it was all on Kiki, and her alone."

You thought for a moment he was going to cry, with the way his face scrunched up, but he kept going angrily: "I told them it could be biological, they told me she was cursed... I told them, maybe the problem was me, they insisted it was her... Until they finally needed proof that we were actually– You know–"

"God," You quietly gasped.

"I don't– We tried to break up, to end the madness, but they wouldn't listen. I had never touched Kiki other than kisses and hugs, while we were lying to them about– She was a virgin and so was I–"

He stopped for a brief moment when his horse whinnied, you were getting closer to the tall walls surrounding Jackson, then continued hesitantly: "She– finally got pregnant, after a whole year of deceiving them, but the stress of it got to her, I think. She... she miscarried." He gulped, closing his eyes tightly, an unpleasant look on his face. "You can imagine how it was received around the community– We had to run, you see, so we did."

You had reached the gates by then, it was Joel who was at the watchtower and waved at you as you waited for the doors to open. You waved back with a worried look on your face, which he must've spied through his binoculars. After bringing the horse into the stables and handing back your rifles, you stopped him. It was unusually quiet and empty around the southern gate, which was normally empty anyway: "Listen, I just wanna say–"

Before you knew it, a stuck gasp left him. His back was to you, so at first you thought he saw something, but as soon as you stepped to his side: "Ward," He was crying. "Oh– Hey, it's okay..."

He whimpered until he ran out of breath, covering his face with his hands. You didn't know how to react, internally panicking and carefully studying his body language, while feeling like a dick about it. You slowly and carefully put a hand on his back, and at the touch, he immediately collapsed by your feet. He was weeping now, and too close for comfort. You quickly looked around to see if anyone was there, only to find out not a single soul was in your line of sight, except for the slowly and suddenly approaching figure of your husband.

"Ward, get up," You lightly shook him by the shoulder to get his attention, but this only resulted in him leaning closer to your legs. You raised your head to see Joel had come to a stop a couple of feet away from where you stood: "Get. Up."

"You said– You said–" He struggled with trying not to cry and breathing at the same time.

"I said there is a group session if you needed to talk," You spoke, defeated, feeling Joel's burning gaze on your eyelids. "I'm sorry for what happened. I really am, but you need to get up."

He looked up at you to meet your stern, pitying gaze, then wiped at his tears. He nodded a couple of times and slowly got up, sniffling quietly. Without saying another word –even though he looked like he wanted to– and sparing you another look, he readjusted his backpack and walked away as if nothing happened. You stood there and watched him leave with your hands on your hips, then let out an exhausted sigh. You were just thankful that you weren't murdered for the most part, irked because of his sudden breakdown, but you also felt like shit scolding him as you did.

"You wanna tell me what the hell was that all about?" Joel. And he neither sounded pleased nor amused.

"You think I have an idea?" You gave him a hopeless look. "Man just– Suddenly told me the rest of his story and broke down, I don't–" Joel stood with his arms crossed, within your 6 feet radius, but there was nothing soft about it.

He was expecting an explanation, and an explanation he got: "That, Joel? That's what fucking scares me! I hear the shit they went through and I listen to it, waiting for the time he's going to get to the part where I did something to him or someone he cared for– waiting for the time they're going to shoot me or stab me– or you! And then they get like– like that, or do something nice to us, and suddenly I feel like an asshole because they're not bad people in the end, they just need some fucking help!"

You breathed heavily as your hands remained open at your sides after all the gestures and motions, your chest rising and falling very obviously as small sweat and tear droplets rolled down your face: "And they're seeking help in all the wrong places, from the most unsuitable people. I don't know about you, but I'm not mentally capable of taking their load while I have my own to deal with."

Joel took in a short amount of breath, as if to speak, but immediately closed his mouth. He stared into your eyes for what felt like 30 minutes, searching for something– you weren't quite sure what. He looked angry, upset, worried and heartbroken all in the same time.

Finally, when he couldn't speak, you added: "If anything happened to me, I could live with that." You spoke calmly, nodding curtly: "But if anything happens to you? I'll tear this whole goddamn town apart and make sure they can't find a place to hide from me."

Your fidgeting, unfocused eyes suddenly found Joel's hazel ones; you saw through all the anger, fretting and upset at that moment.

It was such an adoring, lovely gaze– Bit by bit, it drained you of all the hate and other ugly emotions pressing down your shoulders; a great sense of solace overcoming you as his big, warm hand cupped your jaw. He leaned in to steal the softest of kisses from your damaged lips– subconscious biting had seen to that, but Joel's softer ones made up for the loss on your side.

Before he could give you the chance to debate on whether you should hug him or not, he pulled back, his hand on your cheek still: "I won't let anything happen to you– To either of us. I promise you." You stared into each other's eyes for another moment, then he placed a most gentle kiss on your temple: "I made some dinner for you, go and eat for me."

You nodded, eyes lowering to the ground, then slowly walked away. Joel was quick to take notice of your broken stance– slumped shoulders, slowed steps and, ah, there goes the hand through your hair. He knew, then, that he had to put more effort into understanding how you viewed the couple and respecting your feelings. Sure, you were prone to worry and overthink, but so was he. Nothing, as far as he knew and had seen, had gotten to you like this before. Something ought to be wrong for you to beat yourself up over it as you did.

But despite everything –despite him still not seeing the way you saw the couple– you were, of course (and without question), his priority. He trusted you and your judgement, and it had always been so.

He just hoped it wasn't too late to show you that.

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ragingpancake · 3 years

Text

Menace 2 Society

Set during any time period when Rodney and the gang are on Earth. Possible The Return era. John's away and Rodney finds out a life of crime really isn't for him even though he's really good at it. ~1600 words. Crack.

Author's Note: a repost from my old livejournal, written for @popkin16 allllllll the way back in 2011.

The alcohol stopped burning several shots ago. Now, it slides down as easily as a glass of water (hold the lemon) so he downs the cheap whiskey and motions for another. He thinks the bartender is smirking as he slides the glass across the counter, so Rodney salutes him sloppily with two fingers. "To," he hiccups and burps. Half the liquid sloshes out of the tiny glass as he raises it in thanks. "T'you. For keepin' the good stuff comin'," he says. Or at least that's what he tries to say but it's possible he's speaking Ancient. He swallows and drops the glass back to the smooth bar top and leans over, pressing his face against the cool wood. It feels good and he wants to close his eyes and just sleep. It's not like anyone would miss him anyway.

He sighs and rubs his cheek against it and then he sighs some more. This has turned out to be a spectacularly shitty day. "Ca'I get one more?" Rodney asks. He wiggles a single finger in the bartender's direction, but he will not be swayed. "Sorry buddy. I think you've had enough." It sounds familiar and Rodney remembers even though he came here to forget. "Says who?" He asks, drawing himself up to full height. It's most likely ineffective because he can feel himself swaying on his bar stool. He'll be lucky if he doesn't topple right over into the floor like Humpty Dumpty and that's enough to set him off in a fit of manly giggles. He mumbles the nursery rhyme under his breath--at least, he means to--as he stumbles to his feet and wrestles his wallet out of his back pocket. His fingers, normally so deft and skilled, feel fat and totally useless as he opens the flap and wrestles a wad of money out. It isn't easy but eventually he's successful. He tosses a couple tens down on the counter. "S'been real, m'man!" He calls to the bartender and sweeps his jacket gracefully off the back of the stool. Well, he thinks he sweeps it gracefully off the back of the stool except he's not graceful even under the best of circumstances and drunk out of his mind doesn't really count. He almost falls, but he compensates and manages to keep himself upright. He's the fucking man. "Smooth, McKay," he congratulates himself and saunters--stumbles--towards the exit. Rodney has one hand on the doorknob when the sound of raised voices catches his attention. He whirls around, but when he stops, the room keeps going and it takes a minute until it stops spinning until for him to see the cause of the argument. A guy who reminds him vaguely of Ronon save for the awesome hair, growling a woman who's smaller than Keller. Normally, he would back out quickly before the giant spots him because this is more John's forte than his, but fortified by several shots of cheap whiskey, Rodney puffs up his chest and opens his mouth before his brain catches up. "Hey!" The woman shrinks back, seemingly trying to disappear under the table as the guy turns, narrowing his eyes at Rodney. "The fuck is your problem?" The guy slurs. Rodney hasn't thought this far ahead but he tries for a defiant slouch and glares. "You're m'problem! Maybe you should jus'... jus' shut up and yell at someone your own size." Had John, Ronon, Teyla or even Zelenka been around, they would have reminded Rodney to take his own advice because how many times had he yelled at poor old Miko over the years? The guy laughs and rounds the table, but Rodney doesn't falter. If anything, he stands--tries to--a little straighter and rounds his broad shoulders. There's a very teeny tiny part of his brain, the part that's going to be pissed at him for potentially damaging valuable brain cells when he's not so drunk, that screams at him to run, but he just holds his ground. "You wanna say that to my face?" The guy asks, so close that Rodney can smell what he had for dinner. It's almost enough to make him throw up. "I said you should jus' shut up." The guy reaches out and shoves Rodney. The extra force is enough to knock him off his balance and he tumbles backwards into the coat rack. He's vaguely aware of the bartender yelling over to them, but he's annoyed now in a way that has nothing to do with idiot lab technicians. It's a struggle to get to his feet but he manages and this time when the guy swings, Rodney has enough foresight to duck. He'll thank Ronon later for teaching him to dodge the obvious blows and he'll thank Teyla for teaching him how to strike. His fist connects with the guy's nose and Rodney can feel the satisfying crunch under his fingers. "I did it!" He says, mildly surprised at actually landing a hit. The excitement doesn't last long though because he's only served to piss the guy off even more and this time when he swings, he doesn't miss. Rodney takes a couple of punches, but they're nothing compared to the beating he would have received before Atlantis, before Ronon

and Teyla, before John. They've taught him to use his bulk, his broad shoulders and big hands, to his advantage and while he doesn't escape completely unscathed, he's pleased to see that the other guy is no better off. Of course, he has exactly three point five seconds to celebrate before his arms are shoved behind his back roughly and held in place by the cool metal of handcuffs. A bar fight and an arrest all in one night? John would be so proud. And it's with that thought that Rodney doubles over and empties the contents of his stomach on the floor. --- There's nothing remotely exciting about being arrested, Rodney thinks mournfully as he shifts in the cracked plastic chair. He doesn't even get to go to real jail. Instead, he's being held in the processing room at the local police department, staring dumbly at the back of the officer's head. He's slouched down in a computer chair, playing Solitaire. Rodney wonders what it means about local law enforcement when they can't even win at that. He wisely keeps this thought to himself. "Don' I get a phone call?" He asks. His head is starting to ache and while he's sure he's already thrown up everything he's eaten in the last year and a half, he still feels like he's going to be sick. He really just wants Carter or hell, even Daniel Jackson to come get him so he can go home and sleep for a month. Or at least until John comes back. "Nope," the officer drawls and that's the end of that. Well okay then. He slumps miserably in his seat, handcuffs clinking the metal rail he's attached to. He really just wants to go home. Not home home but Atlantis home where everything was good and John wasn't being stupid and gallivanting off to another planet in the Milky Way with his brand new team. Without Rodney. Apparently, alcohol was counterproductive because while it was supposed to make him forget, it's all he can think about. He's pulled from his thoughts by the sound of a quiet click and when the door opens up, Rodney can hardly believe his eyes. "Hey buddy," John greets, smiling lazily like Rodney isn't handcuffed for a reason that doesn't involve kinky sex. "What are you doin' here?" "Bailing you out," John says easily. "And really? A bar fight? What were you thinking?" "I was amazing," Rodney says, smiling despite himself. He goes to stand and then remembers he can't exactly go anywhere, so he flops down into the chair and sighs loudly. "John?" "Yeah buddy?" "Can we go home now?" John just grins. --- By the time they make it to Rodney's apartment, Rodney's ready to seriously pass out. He's exhausted and his face is hurting from where that Neanderthal's fist connected with it, but mostly, he's just so happy John is back that he wants nothing more than to get upstairs, get naked and sleep for a month. This time with John. It's a chore to get out of the car and up the stairs, but when John finally shoves the apartment door open, Rodney stumbles in gratefully. "You left me," he accuses halfheartedly as he pulls his shirt over his head with clumsy hands, throwing it onto the back of the couch. "Big jerk. S'your fault, y'know." "It's my fault you got arrested?" "Yes," Rodney sighs. John doesn't argue; he grabs the shirt from the couch and then steers Rodney into the bedroom and Rodney is positive that he's stifling a laugh when he face plants onto the bed. "Turned me into a hardened crim'nal. S'all your fault," he mutters, muffled by the mattress. "A hardened criminal, huh?" "You make me crazy." "I feel the same way about you," John says fondly. The bed dips under John's weight and a second later, Rodney finds himself cuddled up against John's side. He presses his face against John's neck and breathes in his scent. "Don't go 'way anymore, 'kay?" "I'm not going anywhere," John promises. "Especially after this. Who knew a few hours apart would send you spiraling downward into a life of crime?" Rodney just nods solemnly and snuffles quietly against John's neck. "'M such a menace to society," Rodney mutters. John laughs his horrible donkey-laugh and

Rodney feels fond lips against the top of his head. "You're a menace alright. Get some sleep, McKay. I have a feeling you're gonna have one hell of a hangover in the morning." Rodney's already fast asleep.

#sga fic #fandom: sga #mcshep #ship: mcshep #john sheppard #rodney mckay #crack fic #this one always cracked me up

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cucumbers-and-olives · 3 years

Text

Enemies to Lovers Part 3

masterlist <<part 1 <part 2 part 3 part 4 (coming soon!) >

Summary: You leave the Gillespie house and head to the airport with Charlie after an eventful two weeks. While at the airport, your flight gets delayed and you learn of some interesting news...

Category: enemies to lovers, angst, fluff

Fandom: JATP

Paring: Charlie Gillespie x fem!Reader

Word Count: 2.5k

Warnings/Includes: arguing/fighting, small panic attack, cringy songs i wrote

A/N: so... i can never post on time. and i know its been a while since i posted the last chapter. i really hope you guys like this chapter! please reblog and comment and let me know what you think! your support means everything, and keeps me going, so thank you.

Mandatory Thanking of the Betas: thank you to @wrhen for giving me help and feedback with this chapter!

AO3 link here (coming soon!)

Please don’t repost my work without my permission, in part or whole. My work can also be found on AO3 @cucumbersandolives. Thank you!

Ice & Fire, and Enemies to Lovers are both my own songs that I wrote. All song rights go to me.

“Charlie! Y/N! Your cab is here!” Ms.Gillespie called. You checked under the bed one last time before grabbing your suitcase and backpack.

“Thank you so much for your hospitality Ms.Gillespie,” You said, walking up to her. “If you hadn’t invited me I would have spent Christmas alone, and this was so much better.”

“Christmas alone? What a loser,” Charlie remarked as he put his bag into the trunk of the cab. You just rolled your eyes.

“Charlie, be a gentleman and grab her suitcase.” Ms.Gillespie said with a calm yet authoritative tone. He grabbed your suitcase and did as he was told. “I’m sorry about him, but I’m happy you had a good time. Maybe you can join us next year?”

“I would be honored,” You said, taking a last glance around the house you had stayed at for the past two weeks.

“Hey! Let’s go!” Charlie hollered from outside. “We’re gonna miss the flight!”

“Thank you, Ms.Gillespie,” You adjusted your backpack and stepped outside to the man who had become a whiny teenager.

“Finally,” He said as you sat down. “She’s my mother, not yours.”

“I’m sorry about him,” You said to the lady in the driver's seat. “We’re all ready to go now, sorry for the wait.”

She nodded and began to drive. The scenery was nice, but it only took a couple of minutes for you to start yelling at Charlie.

“Fuck this,” You pulled out his earbud. The niceties could stop now that his mother wasn’t here. “I have tried to be nice to you this whole time, but now I can say this: You want to act like a little boy throwing a hissy fit? Fine, be my guest. But at least do it in someone else’s company, I have been nothing but kind to you, you-” You almost cussed again, but you reined yourself in. He was worth your anger but not that much of it.

He just rolled his eyes and scoffed. “Whatever you say, princess.” His words, taken in another context, could have easily been mistaken for something other than the daggers they were.

“It’s delayed,” He said, and that simple fact destroyed the rest of the day. “The plane has some issue. They think it’ll be at least two hours, if not more.”

“God, every time I try to like airports, something bad happens,” You said, slumping back into the uncomfortable airport chairs. You knew it wasn’t the airline’s fault, (well it kinda was), but you needed to get back to work. You fiddled with the cord on your headphones before putting them back on.

“Ah- Not so fast,” Charlie said, blocking you from putting them on. He showed you who was calling him. “If I have to talk to the boss man,” He said, referring to Kenny, “Then you do too.”

“See but I don’t,” You said, as you received a different call. “I have a different boss to talk to.”

“I mean, I’m not your boss-” The girl on the other end of the phone said, but Charlie cut her off.

“Are you actually going to talk to Jadah?” He said, about to accept Kenny’s call.

“No, Charlie. Sav’s phone died, so you talk to your boss and I’ll talk to mine.” You walked around for a bit to find a quieter corner of the airport.

“You okay, Y/N?” Jadah asked, finally.

“No, but that's for another time. What’s up?”

“So… Kenny is telling Charlie about the song showcase, but there’s one thing that he’ll leave out.” She said, leaving you on a cliffhanger.

“That is?” You said, prompting her.

“I- I may have slipped him your demos?” Jadah said slowly, and at that moment, all sense of keeping up public appearances went out the window.

“Jadah! Those were not yours to share! In any capacity!” You took a deep breath and asked your first question. “Where did you get them? I thought that the sound guy and I were the only ones with copies?” “I may have bribed him for a copy,” She said sheepishly. Even though you couldn’t see her, you knew she was nervous.

“Jadah, I have one other question.” You paused, trying to figure out how to ask nicely. “Which songs did you give him? Cause if you gave him Enemies-”

“I gave him Ice & Fire, Enemies to Lovers, and I can’t remember the third one. Please don’t be mad.”

“I’m not.” You were, a little bit. “Can you put Savannah on the phone though?” She gave a quick yes, and you could hear the phone being passed between hands.

“Y/N?” Savannah said.

“Did you know? A-about the demos,” You clarified.

“I knew you recorded them, and Jadah had me listen to them. You are amazing!”

“Thank you,” You said. “Uh, E.T.L. isn’t finished yet, but I had the time in the studio so I recorded it.” “Y/N, if you want to be a songwriter, you would be amazing!” She said, but you could tell what she meant.

“I won’t leave you in the middle of a show, Sav.” You were honest with your words. “I know.” She paused. You both knew what amazing opportunities would open up if you did. “Hold on one second, I’m going to go on mute really quick, okay?”

“Yeah, go ahead.”

You could see Charlie coming towards you. His walk had a purpose, but one that was unknown to you.

“Hello, Mr.Ortega! How can I help?” You put your hand out to Charlie, signaling to him that if he talked he would be dead as Kenny spoke.

“I’m not sure if the girls have told you, but we’d love to have you perform your songs at the showcase.” He said, and you chose your words wisely, so that way Charlie wouldn’t know.

“I’d love to! What time, and which ones would you like to hear?” You asked, as you pulled out a pen and rolled up your sleeves.

“Ice & Fire, Enemies to Lovers or uh, E.T.L., I believe that was how Jadah referred to it?” He said, and you could tell he wasn’t sure what to call it.

“Yeah, I can do that, any others?” You said, scribbling down quick abbreviations of the titles.

“Oh there was one more, How to Be a Heartbreaker, I loved that one.” He said, pausing. “And I believe that Jadah mentioned that you had a few others? If you want to pick one or two, that would be great!”

“Alright! I know it’s weird to ask this, but no one has given me any details, so what time is the showcase, and where is it?” You asked, excited for the opportunity to perform.

“4:30 this afternoon, in dance studio A.” You wrote down the time quickly.

“Sir?”

“Yes?”

“I’ll be landing from my flight only an hour before that.”

“Y/N?”

“Yes?”

“You can do it.”

You scoffed a bit as the call ended. “Fuck.” You cussed under your breath.

“Wow, you talked to Kenny, and that's your response to a conversation with him? Anyways, I’m going to grab a coffee, want one?” He offered.

“Uh, I’ll just take a muffin, if they have one.” As you walked away, your brain was moving a mile a minute as you tried to figure out how everything would work.

“C’mon Y/L/N, if there’s one thing you can figure out, it’s making this work. You can do this.”

“Owen!” You said, running over to him.

“Hi!” He said giving you a hug, and then he looked at you. “Sav told me, you look like a mess.”

“Yeah, I know. Look, can you fix my necklace?” You said pointing to the jumbled mess it had gotten into around your neck.

“Yeah, ‘course, turn around,'' He said, and you did so. He got surprisingly close as you moved your hair away from your neck, and as he fiddled with it, you could see Charlie out of the corner of your eye. He had a look that you couldn’t put your finger on, but it almost seemed like… jealousy?

“All done!” He said, patting you on the back.

“Thank you,” You said, adjusting your sweatshirt a bit.

“You got this,” He said, grabbing your hand. “Okay?”

“Okay-” You said, but Kenny’s voice rose above everyone else's.

“Hello everyone! If you could turn your attention to the mirror, that would be great!” Everyone’s eyes turned to him, standing on a chair with a mic in hand. “Here's how this is going to work. I’d like our lovely leads to come to the mirror. Anyone else who isn’t singing can stand off of the dance floor over there,” He pointed to an area.

“If you are singing, you can follow me,” Paul said, raising his hand.

“Okay, go!” Kenny said, and as you followed Paul, you could hear him as a question. “Where is Charlie? Jeremy, check that bathroom, and Owen, look in the break room.”

“That was amazing Anna! Okay, who is next?” Kenny said, motioning to the person in front of you to come out. “Ah, Kevin, what do you have for us?”

Kevin began to talk, but it was hard to hear anything over your beating heart. You tried to take deep breaths, but it just got louder, and your worries began to overwhelm you. You took a step back in the line, making your way to the back. That would give you some time to overcome your worries before you went out there.

The line seemed to move a warp speed, because before you knew it, Kenny was calling your name.

“Y/N? Are you back there?” He asked, and you could hear everyone start to whisper when you didn’t respond.

“Yeah, gimme one second!” You said, fixing your shirt a bit. You got this. You can do it.

As you stepped out onto the stage Kenny’s face lit up. “There you are! How was the flight?” His eyes were kind, but as you looked into the audience, there were many shook faces.

“It was rough, but I’m happy to be here,” You said, sitting down in the chair in the middle of the stage. You kept taking deep breaths, trying, desperately to calm your nerves.

“I know you have a couple, so whenever you are ready, just say the song's name, and what characters you wrote it for,” Kenny explained. You looked around to see who was there. There was the choreo team, some Netflix executives, the lead cast, and a couple of other people who you didn’t recognize.

“This is lce & Fire, and I pictured Alex and Willie singing it.”

“Oh the desire

Like Ice & Fire

Shout it out loud

They won’t bring us down

Not a disgrace

We’ve made mistakes

Our love is strong

So sing along

I’ve been looking for you for so long

(I couldn’t find you)

Now that I’ve met you I’ve

Done something wrong

Oh, Ohhhh, Oh

Oh the desire

Like Ice & Fire

Shout it out loud

They can’t pull us down

Runnin’ from our past

Met in a crash

Through thick and thin

We can win

I’ve been looking for you for so long

(I couldn’t find you)

Now that I’ve met you I’ve

Done something wrong

Oh, Ohhhh, Oh

The forces pullin’ us together

Can’t stop, won’t stop

Oh hold on a little longer now

We’re Ice & Fire

(Fire)

Two parts of one

(One)

Can’t you see the passion in my eyes

Of Ice & Fire.”

As you finished, the final chord rang out from your guitar. The room was silent until Kenny spoke.

“That was wonderful! Booboo, Owen, what do you all think?” He said, turning to the actors for their opinion.

Booboo nodded to Owen. “Well, I think that your song embodies the characters really well. Uh, I definitely would love to sing it in the show, and I, uh personally can see our characters singing it. You wanna go?”

“Yeah, I agree with Owen on so many levels. I’d love to sing Ice & Fire, if that's okay with you Kenny,” Booboo turned to Kenny and the smile that was on his face was slowly mirrored on yours.

“Let’s do it! You wanna sing any others?” The room held its breath waiting for a response. And so did you.

Your first song had passed the test. Made it through. Your knee started bouncing again and you looked up to Savannah.

You got this. She mouthed.

You cleared your throat and moved the capo on your guitar. “Yeah, uh, this one is called Enemies to Lovers, and I didn’t write this one about any specific characters so it can be changed to fit any of them.”

You started singing and getting into the song. A door creaked open and you looked up, curious, and you continued to sing and play.

It was Charlie. He looked like a mess, like he had just gone to hell and back. Moving among the cast to find his seat, he didn’t notice you singing. Until you started the chorus.

It’s like we’re written in the stars,

Enemies to Lovers

Swinging past the bars,

Baby, we’ll discover-

You, me, we’re not so different,

You, me, we always win it,

You and me, we’re better than we seem,

Enemies

He watched you as you sang, and you, in turn, watched him. As you went into the chorus for a second time, you saw something change in his face. A realization or something, and you turned back to face Kenny as you finished the song.

We are written in the stars,

That's how we became

Well, what we are

Bicker hard and far,

Maybe we’ll discover-

You, me, we are different,

You, me, we can’t beat it,

You and me, we’re worse off than we seemed

You strummed your guitar, leaving the song and the story unfinished.

“That was amazing, unfortunately, I don’t think we have space for it in our show.” He smiled. “Someone will contact you about using Ice & Fire.”

The panel along with the rest of the room, packed up their things and started to leave until just you and the main cast remained. You started to walk out of the room when someone called out.

“Y/N! Wait!”

It was Charlie.

You looked at him, “Yes?”

“What the fuck was that song? Who’d you write it about?” He asked, like a love struck boy.

“I wrote it about you, duh!” You watched his face turn into one of- slight happiness? You laughed and started to walk away. Of course, he would think it’s about him, but why would it be? “Fuck you, Charlie. I didn’t think you were that self-centered!”

“I’m not!”He countered, and you stopped walking to look at him.

“Really? Cause only a self-centered person would ask me that… Or, do you have a crush on me? Aww, that’s so sweet!” You mocked. “See you around, lover boy.”

I really hope you liked that chapter! Let me know what you thought!

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#cucumber writes #enemies to lovers pt ♾#julie and the phantoms #jatp fanfic #jatp rpf #charlie gillespie #charlie gillespie x reader #x reader #opj x reader #owen joyner x reader #julie and the phantoms fanfic #enemies to lovers #enemies to lovers fanfic

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forthehpfanboys · 4 years

Text

Bloody Knuckles and Sunshine

Pair: Harry Potter x Reader; he/him.

Summary: Harry loved his ball of sunshine and will do anything, including throwing hands at a dude a head taller than him, to protect it from harm.

Warnings: Mention of the f slur, Fighting, fluffy tho, also small homophobiaaaa

Notes: I loved this, dang-it. Hufflepuff reader!

~DO NOT REPOST ANYWHERE~

Harry put a finger to his lips, signaling to be quiet. He smirked when he saw your friend's eyes light up with mischief and silently agreed. He slowly inched forward, waiting until he was all but pressed against your back. He lunged forward, covering your eyes before whispering ‘guess who?’ in your ear.

He let out a laugh when you screamed successfully catching the attention of everyone in the dining hall. He pulled his hands away only to wrap them around your waist, watching how your face melted into a color to rival a strawberry. He laughed harder when you pulled your hood up to hide your blush.

“Harry, you jerk!” You squeaked out while your friends snickered into their hands. “That wasn’t funny!”

“Aw, I’m sorry, love. You’re right, I’m a big meanie.” He said between chuckles, kissing your hood covered cheek. He laughed louder when you slapped his arm. “How is my favorite ray of sunshine doing this evening?” Harry took any opportunity he could to see you blush and it was quite easy to do, especially with such a soft nickname that fit you perfectly. Seriously, you’re smile lit up entire rooms and Harry levied for it.

“Well, I was telling Cedric about this kneazle kit I found out by the bushes yesterday but now I wanna melt into the black lake and never come back.” You grumbled, slowly pulling your hood down when you were sure the attention and blush had faded. You smiled when Harry responded with a fake gasp of shock.

“And you didn’t tell me? After being your boyfriend for three months?”

“Three and a half-”

“That’s even worse!” Harry pouted at you, cheering internally when he managed to make you blush just the slightest.

Truth be told, you’d been dating the wonder boy for 3.5 months and it all started because you’d bumped into him one random day. You’d apologized so quietly and swiftly, he nearly missed your American accent. He told you it was alright and you ran off before he could get a name. He ended up seeing you later that day, during dinner at the dining hall. They did a quick welcome ceremony for you before sorting you with the hat. Harry was practically leaping for joy when you were put in Hufflepuff. He was just grateful at the time to not have to deal with another Slytherin who’d judge people for something as simple as blood status.

While you were quiet and shy and reserved and just overall the softest human Harry had ever met, he tried to talk to you whenever he could. He managed to break your shell a little bit each day, slowly spending more time with you and introducing you to his friends.

You’d study with Hermione and help her tutor the other two dorks in the group. You’d play wizard's chess with Ron where most games end in a tie, but ever so often you would beat him, as would he. Long story short, his friends love you and at this point, Harry was loving you too, just a little differently. He wanted to hold you at night and fall asleep in your arms. He wanted to bake your favorite cookies just to see you smile. He wanted to see your bright eyes reflect the stars so badly.

So one day he did it. He asked you on a date in the middle of one of your chess games with Ron, leading to Ron winning because you were far too distracted by the males request. You did end up saying yes though, which rocked his hard harder than anything else.

He took you to Hogsmeade, obviously. He showed you the shops, since this was the first time you’d been. He introduced you to the lovely world of Honeydukes and the Three Broomsticks. One date led to another, then another, then another, until it was literally a weekly thing. He saved Friday after school for you and only you. It was, actually, really cute.

At every month milestone of you two being official boyfriends, he’d try to do something immensely special. In the first month, he took you out on the quidditch brooms for a night ride out. You gazed at the sky together, watched the sun set and returned to cuddle in his arms in the common room of Gryffindor tower. Second month, the two of you went adventuring in the Forbidden Forest, with Hagrid low-key third wheeling to make sure you were safe, then a cute picnic by the Black Lake. This month, he’d snuck you into the Shrieking Shack just so you’d get scared and confide in him. It was terrifying, but he made up for it with snuggles and treats swiped from the kitchen after hours. You were excited to see what month four had coming.

“Oh, stop. You’re acting like a big baby.” You giggled out, leaning over to kiss his shoulder. You waved your friends off when they faked a few gags. “What brings ya over here, anyway?”

“What? I can’t see my ball of sunshine? I’m hurt, (Y/n)! You wound me!” Harry scoffed, placing a hand over his chest as if his heart had shattered like a mirror. He looked around at your friends when they all grew quiet. “..What?”

“You usually only come over here to tease him or because someone specific and blonde was staring at him from across the room.” Cedric spoke up, his eyebrows cocked up while Harry’s furrowed in confusion.

“What? Do I?” Harry turned to you, his eyes shining with worry. You bit down on your lip before slowly nodding your head. You spoke up quickly when he let out a pain filled groan.

“But that’s ok because I get to see you in herbology, potions and astronomy!” You waved your hands, trying to show it really wasn’t a big deal. It really wasn’t! You got to see him a lot and understood he couldn’t be with you 24/7 and that his friends wanted his attention too, so it was fine.

“I’ll do better.”

“What? Harry, no! Love, you’re fine!” You squeaked out, cupping his cheek gently. “Honestly, it’s ok.” You pulled your hand away when he swung one leg over the bench to straddle it next to you.

“Are you sure?” Harry stared into your eyes, basically scanning your soul for lies like a bar code. You nodded your head again, planting a soft kiss on his nose. “Ok..” He smiled, pulling you to him before planting his own peck against your lips.

He only pulled back when someone chose to shout a specific f slur across the room. The raven haired male didn’t hesitate to stand up. His eyes were scanning across the now quiet dining hall.

“Who said it?” Harry’s voice was not filled with sweetness. It was filled to the brim with venom and it only became more obvious when no one spoke up. “Oh, come on now! You weren’t scared to shout before! Don’t be shy now!”

Neither you nor Harry batted an eye when McLaggen stood up. The blonde bimbo had been anything but pleasant toward you when you made your relationship public.

“I’m just saying what we’re all thinking, Harry.” McLaggen’s cocky voice spoke up as he stuffed his hands in his pockets. Cormac’s cockiness faded when McGonagall began spouting about intolerable language in Hogwarts and how that word was one of the many students should know better than to say. While the Gryffindor headmaster was going off, Harry didn’t hesitate to walk around the table, despite your protests, and punch the bloke square in the jaw.

You jumped up from your seat just as Cormac’s behind hit the floor of the dining hall. Harry followed the bloke to the ground, deciding to bruise his ego and pretty face further. Upon order of McGonagall, the twins and Lee jumped up, separating Harry and McLaggen. Fred held Harry back while George and Jordan carried the idiot out of the hall.

Once Harry stropped squirming, Fred let go, allowing you to scurry over and grab his hands. You also dragged him out of the dining hall much to McGonagall’s disliking, but went in the opposite direction as the quidditch players. You took him to the courtyard, setting him down on a step before kneeling in front of him.

“Harry.” You spoke up, looking down at his right hands knuckles, that were covered in blood. “Come on, babe.” You whispered out, your heart cracking at the sight of your love hurt.

“I know..” Harry grumbled, his eyes also staring at the red liquid coming from his knuckles.

“So, why do you keep fighting? Words can sting just as much as a punch.” You spoke up, reaching into Harry’s robe and pulling his wand out of the pocket. You transfigured a handful of leaves into a roll of bandages before shoving the wand into Harry’s not bloody hand and started wrapping up his knuckles.

“Because you’re too soft on people.” Harry looked down at his knees, his hands coming to his sides to rest against the stone. He started drawing a pathetic portrait of the two of you sitting at some.. Beach? Maybe it was grass. Poor babe couldn’t draw that well.

“Hun, people have reasons behind the things they say and do..” You rested a hand against his shoulder. He looked up from his drawing in the dirt to gaze up at you, his eyes big and innocent even after a fight.

“I know..” He grumbled again. “But he deserved it this time, babe, you know he did. If it wasn’t me, it’d be Cedirc or Ron for Merlin’s sake.”

“I know..” You sat down next to the raven haired male, pulling him to your side and letting him lean his head against your shoulder. “I’m not mad, ya know? It.. It was nice.” You bit your lip. Harry knows that hesitation. His eyes snapped up to yours, noting the soft blush across your cheeks.

“Oh, really, sunshine? You like it when I play knight?” He wiggled his eyebrows, smirking a little when your soft pink cheeks turned brighter in hue.

“May-.. No, I’m not giving you a reason to keep getting bloody knuckles.” You shook your head, gazing across the courtyard.

“Oooh, you do like it when I play knight!”

“Harry, no.”

“Harry yes!”

“Harry, no!” You shouted, your voice slightly sterner. Harry wasn’t used to you being so stern or loud, it was kinda scary. “Do not get into more fights just to fluster me.” Your shy demeanor came back ten fold, causing him to smirk wider.

“Of course not! Why would I do that, sunshine?” Harry snickered, his arms wrapping around your waist and kissing the base of your neck. He wasn’t going to bring up every year he managed to find himself in literal life or death situations or the fact that he was most likely going to be defending you again.

“Because your Harry Potter and ‘I-Fight-Homophobs’ really should be your middle name.” You smiled, praying he didn’t notice how hot your body had gotten from the heat. He let out a final laugh, his lips planting a big kiss to your cheek. “Harry, seriously, though. No more fights. It’s scary.”

“No, I know! Whatever you say.”

“I’m serious!”

“No, I know!”

“Then where are you going?”

“To finish what I started! Just five minutes, sunshine. Just five, I promise!”

“Harry, no!”

#harry potter x male reader #harry potter imagine #harry potter #hp x male reader #hp imagine #cedric diggory #ron weasley #hermione granger #male reader #x male reader #Ronny Writes #fic #hp male fic #hp fic

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theonetheycallhannah · 3 years

Text

The Treatment of Captain Syverson-Chapter 20: Second Assist

Characters: Captain Logan “Sy” Syverson, Shane Benton (OFC), various other original supporting/secondary characters

Summary: Shane reunites with friends and family, hashes out some feelings, and gets real with Sy. Can their relationship survive her trauma? And the threat that still looms above them?

Romance and Smut Abound HERE!

Word Count: 4500

Warnings: Mention of rape, alcoholic beverages, violent imagery…feels out the butt.

Author’s Note: You guys are so splendid and beautiful! I can’t thank you enough for your support and encouragement to finish this piece. First, welcome to new readers! I know poor Henry’s injury and subsequent physiotherapy has driven some of you here, and while I’m sorry for him, I’m glad I can consider myself something of a pioneer in this particular genre and provide you some help for your newfound thirst. To my OG readers, it is to you I owe this entire work, parts written and incomplete, and I hope an eventual book deal. I mean to mention you in my acknowledgements, should this ever reach a willing publisher. You’ve inspired me so supremely that I cannot quantify it, even with the words I hold so dear.

Since my last chapter was posted, we’ve said a relieved goodbye to 2020 and a tentative hello to 2021. To be honest, this year has started out worse than last year. Lots of bad weather in my area this winter, my sister is currently on her way to a new life in another state, and my grandmother, the last grandparent I had, passed away in February. Those last two things have been especially difficult to shake off and recover from, both coming to fruition pretty suddenly. Amongst all that, I’ve been pretty distracted by my other fandoms, especially Marvel, and I’ve been reading a killer book series that I’m utterly in love with. (The Throne of Glass novels by Sarah J. Maas. 10/10 recommend.) But I knew I needed to get back into Shane and Sy’s story, especially given the new and rekindled interest in the subject matter. In all honesty, I’ve had most of it written for months. It’s just been a matter of finishing it off to set up the rest of the story.

I really hope you all enjoy Chapter 20, Second Assist, and would love your feedback and notes. You are all so important to this story, and your notes, reblogs, and comments are cherished. Thank you so much for reading! Love from Hannah!

Disclaimer: Unfortunately for me, Henry is not mine, le sigh, and all mention of him, his characters, any characters from his films, or his precious doggy, Kal, are strictly for transformative and recreational use. I neither ask for, nor accept payment for the work I post on Tumblr or AO3. Unbeta’d because this is for fun and escapism. This is an original work by me, Hannah. Please reblog if you wish to share. Please do not repost either in whole or part, as the work of anyone but myself. Thanks so much for reading!

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X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@X@

Shane woke in her warm bed, late morning sun streaming in through her sheer curtains, the heavier drapes parted to let in the light. She wished she'd remembered to close them before now. She really was not ready to be awake.

She was sore. Achy. Her sleep had been fitful and full of shadowy nightmares and muffled screams. Beyond that, she didn't try to remember images or events. She knew the general premise of the dreams. It would take a lot of time, effort, or a miracle to make her forget those traumas she'd been through in the last week. Not even forget. She knew she never would. But move on from them. Accept them. And heal from them…even that seemed a mighty obstacle. One she was not sure she could surmount.

Through the open bedroom door, she could hear Lynyrd Skynyrd and the clanging and sizzling of pans, and she could smell bacon and freshly brewed coffee. Sy had left the room, but had not, it seemed, gone far. She gingerly sat up, stood from the bed, and donned her robe as she walked out into the hall and down the corridor to the kitchen.

The sight before her warmed her heart. There was Sy. In only his boxers, daringly frying the notoriously dangerous breakfast meat. Upon her entry to the kitchen, she could also smell pancakes, and she thought syrup, as well. He seemed to be warming a bottle of the maple unction in a pot of hot water. He turned as she stepped on a squeaky floorboard, and grinned widely at her.

"Mornin' sunshine." And she was struck by the irony of someone with such a radiant smile calling her sunshine. Especially when she didn't feel much like beaming. But she couldn't help return the expression, even through her pain.

"Mornin' bear. Did you go to the store?" She knew she couldn't have any bacon in her fridge, and she doubted her eggs and milk were still good at this point. But she also couldn't think that he would leave her for any reason.

"Nah, some of the guys brought over some provisions. Matt worked on your car all night, too, and filled up the tank. It's as good as new. He and Nate brought ‘er over as well as the groceries. I just had ‘em get stuff I knew your family wouldn't be bringing later. They've had tons of food given to them this week, and they're ready to share. You should have seen your mom loading me down with sandwiches and chips and whatnot when I visited them."

"I still can't believe you met them. I really wanted to introduce you personally." Shane's face fell. She would never be able to get that back. She wanted to cry. Sy had poured her a cup of coffee and sat it in front of her with her favorite creamer.

"Darlin' I’m so sorry. I had to talk to them."

"I know." she sniffed. "I'm not mad. Not at you. Just…"she didn't want to say Elliott's name. "I'm disappointed that the experience was stolen from me." That so many things had been stolen from her. By that monster. There was no other way to describe him. Sy growled. As if he could read her mind. He really just knew her well enough and shared her thoughts.

"Well, don't worry, we'll have a nice dinner with them one of these days, and we can pretend. Sound good?"

"Yeah, and I can feign nervousness." she laughed.

"And I'll pretend too. That I'm scared to meet your dad." he chuckled. "What if he threatens me with his shotgun?"

"I'll pull the ol' 'Daddy, no, I loooooove him!' line, as I throw myself between you!"

"That oughta work." he laughed and kissed her on the forehead as he stepped toward the stove and flipped a pancake.

As they sat eating their late breakfast, Shane's mind wandered. Nothing had changed on the surface, but everything was different now. This cozily mundane breakfast with her boyfriend felt like an out of body experience. As delicious as it was, as wonderful and comforting as it should feel, her guard was up. Even through her amiable façade. She was not the person she was two weeks ago. She was not the same woman who said goodbye to Sy at the base. Maybe that was the real transformation. Maybe that was why nothing felt normal. It wasn't the world, but her own self coming back into it.

"Shane?" Sy asked, gently, but it felt like he was speaking through a megaphone directly into her ear. She was so startled, she nearly dropped the half full mug of coffee that was paused midway to her lips. A bit sloshed out onto the table and splashed her shirt.

"Shit!" she chided herself. It wasn't a big deal, but she felt stupid jumping at the sound of her own name.

Sy reached for the closest towel, hanging from the oven handle, grabbed it and started for her clothes with it. She stopped him. But she couldn't think about why the intimate act made her uncomfortable.

"No, don't, it's fine. These clothes have seen better days, anyway." She pulled the towel from him and began to mop up the small puddles of coffee around her plate.

Sy seemed to note the stains already present on the shirt, as if trying to divine their history. She was something of a messy eater, so the battle wounds of many a barbecue, spaghetti dinner, and hurried breakfast peppered the now off-white SATB club tee she'd gotten her second or third year in college choir. She thought back to a huge room with high ceilings. White, cinder block walls, flecked tile floors, a beautiful, glossy, black baby grand in front of a long whiteboard with black lines to resemble sheet music. She thought about the mnemonic device she'd learned to help her remember what notes appeared on each line, and in the spaces between them. She pondered the deeper meanings and implications of these devices. EGBDF…every good boy does fine. She thought about the "good boys" in her life. She knew many. Her dad, her brother Ethan, Sy, obviously, her many male coworkers and friends…and honestly they did far better than "fine." They were wonderful. But she was letting the "bad boys" she'd encountered dictate her mood. Permeate her psyche. Tear her down. She didn't want to be like this. Then FACE came to mind, and above their purpose of indicating the notes between the lines on the staff, they called her to action. To face these newly minted demons with all the strength she knew she possessed, and she too would "do fine." But as with almost all actions, this was easier said than done.

She felt a warm presence on her left hand which had paused it's torture of the now coffee-infused kitchen towel. Sy's hand was squeezing hers gently.

"Shane." he uttered, barely above a whisper this time. She looked at him through tears that she had not realized had formed. He continued.

"Shane, what can I do, darlin'? I'll do anything."

"Babe, you're doing everything you can, and more. This…this is all going to have to come from me. I…don't know when I'll be myself again…" she paused, tears streaming now. "I'm…I'm different."

"You're not though." he reached for her face, but she pulled away.

"I am, damn it! Sy, I was…" Words had power. And the one she was thinking of had more power than she thought was warranted. She knew that uttering it would take away it's power…and yet mustering the courage and strength to actually do so…seemed impossible. She took a deep breath, and disassociated herself from the statement, even though it was about her own past.

"I was raped." She refused to cry. She felt it all again. She had never said the words. She had never thought it necessary. Everyone understood. Sy, his friends, and she was sure her own loved ones had made the connection. But she knew she needed to say it now to drive home the points she was about to make.

Sy, looked at the table, nodding, not needing to be told in so many words something he already had surmised from the clear evidence. He remained silent. She went on.

"I love you, Sy. I have since the day we met, on one level or another, and I believe that I always will. But I…right now I can't be a proper girlfriend to you. I can't…be with you, touch you, be touched by you, in the way we used to be. In the way you deserve…and I don't know when…or even if…I ever will. Not that I don't want to. That's ALL I want in the world. To go back. To be the woman who fell in love with this…incredible man. To make love with you, but…I can't."

Sy's eyes were full of tears, their predecessors already descending his round cheeks and disappearing into his thick, dark beard.

"Sy, I don't want to lead you on and keep you tied to a relationship with no life in it. You deserve someone who's whole. Someone who can be a fully invested partner for you, and not this broken, damaged--"

"You stop that, Shane. I won't hear no more of this kinda talk. Y'hear? You're my girl. My woman. My person. No matter what. You gotta know I'd never leave ya just cuz you aren't ready for sex again. You don't think that I would, do ya?"

"Well, you went to Virginia…you took that job…knowing the distance it would put between us. Literally and figuratively."

"Biggest mistake of my life." Shane raised her eyebrows in surprise as Sy elaborated. "I couldn't focus on my classes without wishing you were there. Wishing I could team up with you for discussions and hand to hand combat training…that thought got me a little too excited, if you catch my drift." He smirked, pulling a sheepish smile from Shane. "Then in that forest. I dreamt about you every night. I thought of you constantly. I could barely breath sometimes, I missed ya so damned much. I was an idiot. I was insane to think that I needed anything other than you. Any MORE. There IS no more. You're it. You're the MOST! The most important thing in my life."

The declaration hung like vapors in the air, more felt than seen. Tangible yet ethereal.

"And when I found out that you were missing…I was…well, I think I looked like death…and not warmed over. You can ask the program director I met with after I got the news. She could tell I was just sick over it. And as I thought about it on the way home, pieced things together, started thinking about who'd taken you, I got murderous. Shane, I have been in dozens of battles, skirmishes, firefights, you name it. War. But…the sheer bloodlust I felt thinking about what you could be going through…I've never experienced anything like it. Everything was red. Everything. For days. Until I saw you, alive. And then it went red again when I saw the fear and damage on your face." she could tell he was doing his best not to talk about the farmhouse and that basement, but she still flashed back to the moments before and after his appearance there. The moments when she simultaneously prayed to live and hoped to die.

"You don't owe me anything, Shane. I just want you in my life, and I don't care what your presence looks like. Romantic, platonic, or somewhere in between. I'm here for you. And I wouldn't have it any other way."

Shane felt the urge to wrap her arms around her boyfriend, but could not seem to move more than one arm to place her other hand on top of his. She hoped the gratitude and love behind the small, but heartfelt gesture landed. It was all she had in that moment, no matter how abundant her affection.

~~~~~~~~~~

Shane's family's arrival was a complete blur to her. It was joyous, tearful, and the happiest she'd been in a long time. The moment she opened the front door for them, she was surrounded, engulfed with hugs from her parents and siblings. They stood in their affectionate huddle for several moments before Peg waved Sy over with marked insistence. He'd been standing by, observing happily, but not wanting to intrude on the familial reunion.

When they finally dispersed, John asked the two younger men to help him bring in groceries. The women headed into Shane's bedroom for a more private setting in which to talk. Shane filled her mother and sister in the best she could given the rawness of the wounds left on her mind by the events.

She leaned against the headboard cuddling with Gabby while her mom rubbed her feet. She had insisted on doing this thing that had always comforted her children, and made them feel much better when they were younger.

"Well, I'm very proud of you, pumpkin." The girls both looked at their mother, who rather uncharacteristically hadn't spoken in some time. Shane was nonplussed. Peg elaborated.

"You survived something that many women don't. You're talking about it now, which even more women don't. You may think you're broken, but you're just a tree damaged by a storm, but standing stronger than ever." Trust her mom to lay such wisdom on her. When she felt like giving up. When she just wanted pity. When she could only see defeat. Her mother had always found a way to encourage and buoy her and show her the victory.

"Mom's right." Gabby affirmed, and it was Peg's turn to be nonplussed, as the two women, though similar in so many ways, never seemed to see eye to eye. "It's true. Shane I've seen a lot of women come into the clinic in shoes very much like yours. And trust me…some of them…they don't make it to this point. You've got a long way to go before you're fully recovered, don't get me wrong, but you'll get there. You have us. And you have Sy."

"And then there's Sy." She diverted. "How am I supposed to plan any sort of future with him when…" She looked at her mom, and hesitated. Peg rolled her eyes.

"Shane, I know what the two of you get up to when you're alone. You don't have to be shy with me."

"Still…" she took a breath and spoke. "When I can't bring myself to…sleep with him?"

"Look at him, you're kidding, right?" Gabby chided, insensitively, but recanted at the pained expression on Shane's face. "Sorry, sis. Trying to lighten the mood a touch. Too soon. But seriously, I don't think this reluctance you feel will be permanent."

"And even if it is," Peg took over, "that man is out-of-his-mind in love with you, Shaney." She kissed Shane's toe before putting a sock on her foot. "He almost seems to worship you. Now, you know how I feel about using that term outside of religious context, but that is exactly the kind of love I want for you. Devout, and unconditional."

"But, mom, I can't--"

"Did you hear me? I said 'unconditional,' sweetie." Peg interrupted. "No matter what. No matter the obstacle. No matter the distance. No matter the circumstances. Love unwavering. That's what Sy has for you. I've seen it in him. Trust the momma."

The insistence her mother placed on trust had always ruffled Shane's feathers. Gabby's too, who she could feel stiffen slightly beside her. But Shane, for once, really wanted to trust her mother, hoping against hope that she was right. And that she, herself wouldn't screw up the best relationship she had ever been in or was likely to ever be in again.

The girls had begun talking about some of the coworkers who'd brought food in the past week, and Peg couldn't resist remarking on the character of her favorites and judging the ones she didn't care for…oddly enough, getting more or less, the correct measure of them, as Shane saw it.

After what must have been an hour from the time they'd arrived, they heard a knock on the slightly ajar bedroom door. John poked his head in.

"Ladies, we've put a casserole in the oven, and completed various manly projects around the house--"

"Oh, daddy, what projects?" She cringed. She hated that the men had felt the need to "fix" things.

"Babe, your guest bathroom had not one, but two leaky faucets, your kitchen table seemed to be more of a teeter-totter, and half the light bulbs in the living room were out. Among other tiny things. You're welcome." he smirked his crooked smirk so similar to her own, and she returned it as if he was looking in a mirror.

"Thanks, dad."

"Anyway, lunch is almost ready. So, when you've finished your confab, let's eat."

Dinner passed amiably, Shane found a reserve within herself to allow some quasi-normal behavior, as long as you didn’t look too closely. She was talking animatedly with her siblings, making their parents and Sy laugh riotously. Shane noticed some odd looks passing between Sy and her father, but chalked it up to paranoia. She wished at least Gabby and Ethan could stay, but Heather would be over soon, and she deserved her own dedicated time. Shane wanted to give that to her.

She said her farewells to her family with promises to visit them the next day, and at least one more time before her siblings went back home, if she could work it out.

Sy was so wonderful the whole time. Standing by her, a hand resting lightly on her shoulder as they waved goodbye to the departing vehicle. He made her feel so safe. They went into the kitchen and cleaned up from lunch. Well, Sy cleaned. Shane was texting Heather about when she'd be over.

"Heather says she'll be here in about a half hour. She's picking up wine and pizza." Shane told Sy without looking up from her phone. She could see out of the corner of her eye, though, that he had just closed the dishwasher and was selecting a cycle.

"Sounds great. Do you want me to get out of here? Give you guys some time, one on one?" He asked as he dried his hands, wet from preparing dishes for the machine.

She thought about it, and shuddered. She played a scene in her head that startled her. In her mind's eye, she saw Sy leave and then moments later heard a knock on the door. Presuming it was Heather, she opened the door with abandon, only to see Elliott standing there under a flickering porch light, smirking maliciously at her and ready to overpower and abduct her again. She shook the thought from her head, but remained uneasy as she answered his question.

"Uh, no. Thanks. I'm sure she'll want to talk to both of us. She likes you." Shane grinned softly at Sy in an attempt to mask her trepidation over the thought of him leaving her alone for any period of time. She thought it had worked.

"Okay, well, whatever you think, sunshine. I don't wanna get in the way." He was wiping down the countertops. She felt so impossibly full of love for him, she was starting to wonder how she hadn't yet burst with it. She couldn't bear the thought of holding him back from a fulfilling relationship. He deserved everything she couldn't give him right now. And she knew she should make him leave her. Cut him loose. But she was, as she'd been since she'd met him, a weak woman. She couldn't stand the thought of being without him. Of him no longer being hers. And somehow worse, of not being his, herself. She would always need him for so many reasons, not least of which being her love for him. Maybe one day, she'd recover from this trauma, and be able to be who he deserved. To give him what he needed.

"You're never in the way, bear." She walked up behind him, wrapped her arms around his middle and squeezed him as tight as she could. He placed a loving hand over hers, sighing and smiling, though she had no visual proof of the latter. It was just a feeling.

Heather's greeting was no less exuberant than that of Shane's family, but it was more joyful and less emotional, even though she was immensely relieved to see her best friend after so long. They talked as if no time had passed, and Shane mustered up the dregs of her former self to have one more interaction for the day. Thank God it was Heather and not someone who would require more. She wouldn't have it to give.

"I am so glad you're okay, Shane! Things around the clinic have been bleak as fuck. Susan is loosing her mind, Anita is beside herself with concern, and the rest of us just plain ol' miss the hell out of you. And not just because of all of the overtime everyone has been pulling to get your patients seen."

"Oh, God, I'm so sorry! I didn't realize…wow, I'm awful. I didn't even think---"

"That you'd be missed? Think again, sister. The place would fall apart if you ever really left. But don't feel guilty. It's the least everyone can do, and they've all said it themselves. We all love you, and know that you'd do the same for any of us if you could at all. Hopefully you won't have to, though!"

Shane nodded, eyes wide in agreement. She wouldn't wish the last week of her life on her worst enemy. On the worst person in the world. Except maybe the people responsible. Tit for tat.

"Well, I'm sorry my absence has caused extra work for all of you." Shane looked into the deep glass of Chardonnay Sy had poured her from the bottle Heather had brought. She felt about as small as the air bubble making it's way up the sloping curve of the stemless vessel. She felt a guilt that she knew was fully void of logic. It made no sense for her to feel guilt for being kidnapped. But she had always had this notion, this nagging voice in her head that told her that her misfortunes were a direct result of her decisions. That she'd inadvertently stepped on the butterfly that resulted in the monsoon she was currently experiencing, and whatever cataclysmic events she would face next.

"Why in God's name are you apologizing for this, Shay?" Heather's tone was kind, but still mildly scolding.

"If I'd never been with Elliott, none of this would have--"

"Bitch, are you a fortune teller?"

"No, but--"

"Soothsayer?"

"No."

"Time traveler?"

"I wish!" Shane chuckled. But she really did wish.

"Have you any real and proven success at consistently predicting the future?"

"I don't, but--"

"No. No buts. No howevers. You had no idea what becoming involved with Elliott could have done. Were there signs, sure. But you can't look on the past as a rubric to judge the quality of your decisions. You know that. You can only learn from your mistakes. And you have."

"Heather's right, sunshine. You really have learned. You look for Elliott's behaviors in mine and shut me down quick if you see 'em. You're not going to let yourself go down that road again. And I'm proud of you for it."

Shane silently worried her wine glass. It was hard to argue with such truth. But it was hard to agree when her own feelings were in such stark opposition. So she did neither.

"Well, I've preached my sermon for the day." she laughed. "I've taken up enough of your time. Oh, your phone. It's in my purse. I think it's fully charged, but I turned it off."

Shane thanked her friend, then Heather hugged them both and took her leave.

"Y'okay, bug?" Sy asked her after what she surmised was several minutes of silence. Minutes she didn't notice as they passed.

"Mmm…" she trailed off.

"Can I do something for ya?" And she really thought about the question. He could probably do a lot of things for her. He could make love to her until she felt whole again, even if it hurt her at first. Not an ideal option. He could probably get them both some new identities and enough money to spirit her away to somewhere her past wouldn't follow. If she became someone new, literally, would she have to bring that old baggage, those old scars, with her? Again, suboptimal. But he could definitely take the source of all grief and turmoil in her life far into the Missouri back country, somewhere not even the hunters would venture, some fallow field or forgotten cistern, and end him. Snuff out his spark of life like a candle caught in a tornado. Spill a fatal amount of his monstrous blood onto the unforgiving earth and send him to the Hell to which he was undoubtedly destined. But did she want that? Did she want another soul as a scar on that of the man she so deeply cherished? He'd say it was worth it. He'd say he'd take a thousand more for her. A million. That was Sy.

"Nothing comes to mind." She lied. And he knew it was a lie, but didn't push it. She was so grateful that he respected her, not for the lie itself, but for the reason she wasn't giving him the whole truth just now.

His phone went off and he picked it up as he stood from his seat at the table. She could only hear that it was Matt, the guy she thought she understood had the car place, before she heard tension in Sy's voice. Even from the next room, she could tell something was wrong, though he was talking too quietly for her to make out words.

She heard him suddenly shout a stream of profanities that he rarely said at all around her, at least, let alone together. There was a bang, and the walls of her kitchen quaked like the tectonic plates beneath them were shifting.

Sy walked back in, his face was red, as were his knuckles. He was shaking an injury out of his hand.

"What's wrong?" she asked, deep concern at his appearance and demeanor, suddenly ominous.

"I need to fix your wall in there." he grumbled, evading, without success. She'd be doing therapy on his hand, next.

"What's really wrong?" she repeated, sternly.

"That was Matt. Elliott's…escaped, somehow. He's in the wind."

Shane's heart became so heavy, she could almost feel it smashing through the kitchen floor and burying itself deep in the cement floor of her basement.

"Oh, God! No! What if he goes to the police!?"

"Fuck that, I'm more concerned about him coming after you!"

The two stared, faces full of equal measures of concern for the other.

Up Next: Chapter 21-Patient Education

#netflix #netflix sand castle #captain syverson #Captain Syverson x OFC #captain syverson fanfic #sigh for sy #henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic #henry cavill x reader

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ddullahan · 3 years

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hadestown au 1

HI SO My anxiety has been through the fuckin roof for the past few weeks and in a fit of stress I deleted the first look of the bees hadestown au that I posted a few weeks ago. I’m feeling much better now and I wanted to repost it because I really am super excited about it >< Anyway, second verse, maybe same as the first, here we go! ---------------- it’s an old song As all tales begin, there comes a moment of question. The precipice we all stand at, toes hanging over the edge, eager to take the plunge. The question, different for every eye and ear turned to the story, starts as a feeling. It buoys us through the long swathes of paragraphs ahead. It seeps into our minds, and pushes us off the edge. We have that moment of freefall. Of realisation. We have to trust in something to catch us. Like most fairy tales, it begins with once upon a time. There laid a railroad track. If you've ever heard the rails sing on a good, windy day, you'd know the sound sticks to the back of your mind. There to stay until the dark of night, when it creeps up to whisper wanderlust into your bones. The song of the rails is a low and resonant thing, humming into the willows scattered along the railroad sides. They used to say the rails were the Fates groaning in your ears. Urging you along. Waiting in anticipation for the train to come to call. Waiting for the story to start its freefall. The metal likes to wail beneath blackened wheels on hot, summer days. Days much like the one in which our story begins. Once upon a time - Metal chatters under the weight of an ancient, scorch-marked train. Decorated with blacked out windows. Panes of glass soot-stained, like they’d been brushed with fire one too many times. Coal smoke bursts from its chimney with a grudge, flooding the gray skies in the type of black smog that you can taste in the back of your mouth, long after the train’s disappeared. It was painted white once, a long, long time ago. A gift from the boss man down below for his flowering wife; but it’s one of those gifts you shove in the back of your drawer. One of those things that you spend your nights lying awake in bed, thinking in guilty chords. The train still runs, but the old white sides are now black and cold. Like the panting of dogs on the skin of your heels, the wind still blows hot behind it. The only thing it tows are souls to their final destination, but it won't take you if you ain't got the gold to board. It’s a fact almost everyone knows. ‘Cause the old legends say the road to hell could lead you out of poverty, but you gotta pay the toll to get that good money. The wind cracks and snaps after the train; sends the short ribbons of inky black hair whipping. Snapping into the brown-skinned face of a hungry young woman. Blake Belladonna’s eyes glint like knives with a debt to pay, and her steps are sure footed against the rolling rocks under her boots. She wears a weathered bag slung over her shoulder, and a once-warm leather duster now worn to shit and hole-y. She seems small among the billowing willows and smoggy skies. She doesn't know where she's going or how she got to the railroad at all - but she knows how to turn her collar against the wind. And she knows how to run. Metal shrieks, pulling her eyes up like a hand to the chin. She’s left to watch as the ruined, black omen of a train screams past a small, dilapidated station. It’s the only structure for miles. The cicadas are screaming along to the wailing of the tracks in a symphony, until the locomotive vanishes over the curve of a distant hill. The station's dry, mud-caked windows send silt drifting to cracked, rotting floorboards. The coke-bottle thick panes rattle angrily in their fragile frames, and then come to find their peace once more. Damn this is a dump, the young woman thinks, approaching the station. But it'll have to do. The sun's rays sink into her skull and turn her warm brown skin hot to the touch. It's far too hot for April. Stepping into the shade is an immediate relief, until the hot wind kicks up again. It blasts in her face as if to remind her it's there. As if she could ever forget. She's used to the way it whispers starvation in her ears. She throws the door open and escapes from the wind; stumbles her way into the empty station. Small and dusty like it’d been forgotten, filled with only two benches facing each other and a single door hiding behind them in the gloom. There's a sign on the door that reads "End o th line Caf ". Faintly, she can hear music behind it. Blake doesn't hesitate, and heads for the door. The knob breaks off in her hand, but it feels familiar and solid so she pockets it and heads inside. Follows the hallway and the pull of her feet to the music. The walls grow darker and thicker with polished wood. Her steps don't seem to echo and the music has since paused. The quiet starts to make her anxious. She doesn't like dark hallways. She's dreamt of them enough for a lifetime. The further she goes, the more her unease starts to grow and the more she starts to wonder if she's been here before. It's ridiculous, really. This is the farthest south she'd ever gone. Or was she in the east? Her anxious heart speeds up for a reason she can't see, and it's like her feet already know where to go. The hallway turns suddenly and she finds herself standing at the rim of an amphitheater of sorts. The music fades back in. There's a band jamming to soft jazz in the stands, people crowded and conversing at tiny tables scattered about the flat floor at the bottom. There's a man at a piano playing a diddy, there's a flicker of gold in the kitchen beyond. It's alive in a way that she hadn't seen in a long time, and she finds her feet eager to join the dancing 'round the tables below. She takes a step and nearly runs into another woman, decked out in a crisp white and red suit. She’s older, maybe late thirties or mid forties - has this eternally kind, yet melancholy smile. Her features are fair, but tired. Her black hair is pulled back like Blake’s, but tipped with red like the ends had been dipped in paint. Blake apologises immediately - "E-excuse me, sorry," and starts picking her way down to the tables. "No worries dear," She hears faintly behind her, the older woman's face already blurred from her memory. She blinks and suddenly she’s on the bottom floor, with the movers and shakers rattling cups with their stomping jive. She wants to move with them, but she's already reaching for an empty chair, like her hand was following its own storyline. The flash of gold catches her attention again. Her feet slip into a shallow groove in the floor, and she is rooted. Something crashes, and her eyes follow the clattering sharp shards of porcelain. One piece with purple trim bounces off a brown boot. She notices a hole near the big toe. Blake looks up, and her heart decides to freefall. All the way across the floor stands a young woman in an apron. A bucket of newly broken dishes lay at her feet. Her eyes are so pale and pretty they have their own orbit amidst the aging lights above. Her blonde hair ripples into liquid gold, twisted messily into a bun. Broad shoulders are cinched into position with suspenders and there's an off-white shirt rolled up to her elbows, the hem tucked into a pair of trousers. The skin of her strong forearms are tanned and riddled with freckles, spreading constellations all the way up her neck and across the gradual slope of her nose. Oh, there's something familiar about all of this. Blake feels it in her bones. There’s something familiar in the ‘o’ of her startled mouth. Something about the empty hands she hovers, still holding an imaginary bucket of plates. She's got those sharp lilac eyes pinned on something in front of her. It's a jolt to realise she's staring right at Blake. Though suddenly, that older woman in the white and red suit sweeps by that freckled face, and it's with a smile and a wave that their staring contest ends. No one claims the victory as the spell breaks. The older woman asks something that Blake can't hear, but she knows her voice is soft and sweet. Her feet move like she’s skating on air, and Blake decides to focus on that. She focuses on that instead of the heartbeat in her chest. She doesn’t think about how her pulse no longer feels like it belongs to herself. The golden woman nods stiffly and turns. Follows the gliding woman to the back of the house, and Blake is left with a heart migrating into her throat. The hungry young woman quickly tears her gaze away, uproots her feet from the grooves in the floor, and sits at the table she'd claimed. Her skin feels clammy. Her body is buzzing. She shrugs off her bag and coat, then pulls her bag into her lap. As if there was anything in there worth protecting. It could be minutes, it could be hours. She's really not sure, when a shadow falls over her table, and the sight aches like an old friend. A bottle of some fizzy drink is set gently before her, the bottle cap rattling towards her side of the table. Sunflower Pop, it reads. She looks up. The poor young woman, with her liquid gold locks wrapped in a messy topknot, stares right back. They're both struck speechless. If there was ever a moment where destiny fills the lungs, it was then. Anticipation strings itself between their ribs, the cords like telephone wires humming their universal tune. I found you. I found you. I found you. But neither of them say a word to each other. The anticipation feels closer to a noose than a cup-and-string, the longer they spend breathing in the other's presence. The hungry young woman with hair black as night, just couldn't look away. Couldn't make her voice work right. The gold haired woman's jaw seems to work, but there was still no sound to be heard. Eventually the woman just turns around and walks away, toddling and tripping like her knees were unsteady. Blake sits where she left her, feeling much more than sympathy. She feels like her chair would collapse with her if she tried to follow. And again, there are voices whispering in the back of her mind. The wind already found her inside this place, its voices groaning and hollow. It always finds her, and she knows. She knows it always will. But as her slender fingers wrap around the neck of the bottle left on her table, Blake tastes the fizz and hums. Feels the crackle of carbonation all across her skin as she tracks the tall blonde with her eyes. The wind doesn’t feel like a whip in this vibrant, lively place. That has to count for something. Maybe she should stick around, just for one day. Maybe she would stick around and wait for the band to play.

#rwby hadestown au #rwby fanfiction #bumbleby #bumbleby hadestown au #yang xiao long #blake belladonna #i'm still waiting to finish the whole thing before posting it on ao3 #but the more i reread it #the more excited i am #i fucking love this au #thank y'all for your patience T.T #and thank you yangsbandana #for encouraging me to post it again i appreciate you v much T.T #rwby

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otterskin · 3 years

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The Devil in The Window

Apologies for low image quality. This is a repost with some reworking for an earlier, longer breakdown I did of the Loki trailer. Now that episode 1 is out - (YAY I WAS RIGHT, TAKE THAT MEPHISTO FANS! But also I do look forward to his eventual appearance, you think I don’t also have a huge interest in satanic mythology and the devil’s appearances in literature? Because I certainly do.) - I think it’s a good time to review.

Anyway, here’s a new shot of the window, apologies for using the older ones I drew on before from hereafter though. They updated the design for the episode, so some details have changed - however, I think that the old one had some details that were actually better to demonstrate with, the biggest being the change to the chest shape. Still, I think the intent remains, and I suppose it’s all to the good I used the design that shows it clearer.

So, Norse Mythology. It’s been Christiannized. You can thank Snorri Sturluson for that, but you can google all about him later. Let’s just say that he made many Norse figures into equivalents for Christian ones. Baldur is Jesus, pure and a sacrificial lamb who dies for a greater good. And the devil is...Loki. Something the Marvel comics and the MCU have continued.

Here we have a devil, dressed in green and with a distinct shape on his chest:

Hmmm...wait...I know that weird horny shape...(yes they changed this design in the episode, but it still has this basic shape, just with another layer of gold above it.)

Ah. I’d say that cinches it. This is meant to be Loki. If you look at the devil’s hair, it also resembles Loki’s, being shoulder-length and kinda curly.

So, what’s devil-Loki doing? Laying an egg? Trying out a foot massager? For a second I thought it was a moon, but we see the moon over his left shoulder, amongst the stars. Which means this is - probably the Earth.

...Dammit; I live there.

So Earth is barren and being devoured by flames, likely caused by this Loki sitting atop of it (in a throne, no less). Aw gee, things look pretty bad, don’t they?

But wait - what’s that? Under the Earth (and, possibly, under the earth)?

It’s a plant. A shoot, to be exact.

Back to Ragnarok for a second. Ragnarok isn’t the apocalypse (something we see a lot of in this trailer - all of it seems to be exploring the end of days). Ragnarok is the fire meant to wipe out the old and fertilize the ground for the new. And after the gods have died, what happens? Well, Baldur emerges from Hel, one of the only surviving gods (hmm, seems him dying worked out, didn’t it?). He’s joined by Líf and Lífþrasir, who are the new first man and woman, who’s names mean ‘Life’ and who are pictured, usually, with plants and new life. It is they who are tasked who growing a new Yggdrasil after the destruction of the old. The previous first man and woman are Ask and Embla, meaning Ash Tree and Vine/Elm tree, so there’s a theme there.

So a new sprout, possibly a tree, growing out of the destruction of the old.

This fits with Loki’s role as understood in mythology. He checks the arrogance of the gods, including when they tried to achieve immortality (sorry, Baldur, nothing personal), and that keeps the gods at their best. After Loki is imprisoned, the gods become weak, unhelpful and foolish, and Yggdrasil starts to rot. Eventually Loki escapes and returns along with Surtur (who also resembles this figure) to burn it all to the ground. This is also referenced in Thor:Ragnarok, with Loki releasing Surtur in the Vault, a place of thematic importance to Loki and one that represents the hidden secrets and sins of Asgard). You could say Ragnarok continued into Infinity War, where Loki played an important part in aiding Thanos’ destruction, giving up the stone to protect his brother and essentially dooming the rest of the universe - but also ultimately leading to its salvation, even if, like Myth Loki, he wasn’t around to see it.

So, we see the Variant literally start a fire in the trailer -

- in fact, this whole trailer is awash in flame -

It’s fire, fire everywhere and Variant Loki’s setting them!

Damn, even our ‘hero’ Loki is burning stuff down! Does this mean that Loki is doomed, always meant to be an avatar of death and toasty destruction?

Well...let’s go back to that stained glass. Hmmm...wait...I know that weird horny shape...

And there’s something else...the bottom of the Earth is being lit up, and not by fire. Light appears to be coming off this little plant.

What colour is this plant again? That’s right, green. Green is the colour of new life and growth and change and...hang on, I’ve heard that before, too..

Hang on hang on HANG ON... let me have a look at the shape again.

That’s...a letter. An L? For Loki? Like in the title sequence?

Wait...no, a different letter. An older letter. After all, Loki is old Norse. How do you spell his name in that again?

ᛚᛟᚲ ᛁ

And ENHANCE on that third letter!

This, my friends, is a Kenaz/Kaunaz, or what would become 'K' in our alphabet. It is also known as the 'Loki Rune' (and the Ulcer Rune, for some reason. I suspect Odin understands why). It’s used to spell his name, but is also used on his own to represent him. Heck, it's even his Superman 'S' in the comics:

Runes are more than letters - they are symbols for concepts. So what else does it mean?

Primarly, it means ‘torch’.

And also ‘knowledge’ (ken). As well as ‘growth, change, the search for truth, decay, arrogance, elitism, feminine, kinship and creativity.’

...Okay, that’s a lot, but you have to admit it fits.

More specifically, it means ‘Mastery of the Fire’. As in, someone who has learned to tame fire so that it is helpful, not harmful. To bring light and, symbolically, knowledge.

There’s another way Loki’s been associated with fire - in the Wagner Ring Cycle, Das Rheingold, the opera that inspired much the Thor films’ aesthetic and certainly their helmets, Loki is called ‘Loge’, which means ‘Fire’. He’s usually dressed to match, too -

Many trickster figures are associated with fire. They are usually called ‘Fire-bringers’ - See: Raven, Lucifer, Prometheus, etc. They are often complex figures with a foot in different worlds, but who nonetheless help mankind with the gift of ‘fire’ - although they usually pay for it, and tend to be self-destructive.

(Side note. Lucifer means light-bringer, which is what luciferase is named after. Because it glows. Which is helpful in labs. In case someone needed to know that.)

Moving from a destructive fire-starter to a fire-bringer seems like a great character arc for Loki to take, especially given his rehabilitation in pop culture, the comics, and even wider culture. Loki has gone from being seen as an evil, deviant, destructive character to one who’s seen as a patron of the arts and creativity, of stories rather than lies. Heck, some scholars of Norse Mythology even posit that he’s the closet thing to a protagonist Norse Mythology has, so I guess that backfired, Snorri!). Being dressed in green and with the sprout clearly also being stylized after his Kaunaz, there’s foreshadowing that he’ll be capable of growing good things even out of ashes.

So, to sum up: Being ‘Satan’ sounds pretty bad, but with a little letter re-arranging like we see in the title sequence, you can be...

...practically a saint. Maybe even a saviour.

Merry Christmas, everybody.

#runes #loki #loki 2021 #loki analysis #meta #reblog #rework

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scarletwinterxx · 4 years

Text

to Mark Lee

“No no no no no” I say repeatedly as I open the oven, smoke coming out when I fully opened the oven door

“How did I mess this up” I mumbled to myself.

This has already been a very long frustrating day. Nothing’s going my way, and it’s suppose to be a happy day. It was Mark’s birthday, I was planning on baking a cake for him but obviously I just ruined that plan.

I hear my phone ring on the counter making me turn my attention away from the disaster in front of me, already giving up on the burned cake I set it by the sink and turned the oven off before answering the call.

“What?” I asked, annoyance loud and clear in my voice

“Uh you okay?” I hear Mark’s voice asked, oh great now I snapped at the birthday boy

“Oh Hi Mark, sorry I didn’t mean to snap at you” I mumbled

“No worries, are you okay though? You don’t sound good”

I wanted to tell him everything that is going wrong right now but it’s his birthday and all I’ve been doing all day is trying to make this day as special as possible.

I’m clearly failing at that.

“Yea just... Yea no I’m fine” I put my phone in between my shoulders and ear then walked back to the sink thinking of trying to bake another cake

“Okay, you’re coming over later right? Hyungs said we’ll have a little dinner party” Mark asked

“Don’t worry Lee, I’ll be there” a smile already making it’s way to my face. He really could make any day better no matter how bad it’s going. That’s just the effect Mark Lee has on people.

Maybe that’s why people just naturally gravitate towards him, He’s so lovable and adorable without even trying. He may look like the type who doesn’t like being adored or in Yuta’s case smothered, but when there aren’t cameras around he’s really cuddly and cute.

While listening to his story about how the guys barged into his room at exactly 12 am, I got distracted and forgot the fact that I just took the pan out of the oven. I accidentally touched it, immediately screaming in pain and dropping my phone.

Quickly putting my injured hand under the running water, while I reach out and grabbed my phone on the floor using the uninjured one

“What was that? Are you okay?” Mark asked, there was no point in saying I was when in reality I’m two seconds away from bursting out in tears

“No, I just burned my self. Can I call you back later?” Saying a quick goodbye to him, I then assessed my hand. Seeing a bright red line across three of my fingers.

Five minutes ago I didn’t know this day could get worse, I was apparently wrong.

I grabbed an icepack and rested my hand on it, finally giving up on the idea of baking a cake for Mark. I walked back to the couch and slumped on the seat, some time while scrolling through my phone waiting for my hand to stop hurting I fell asleep.

The sound of someone knocking on my door woke me up from my accidental nap. Still a bit disoriented, I walked to the door and opened it.

There a Mark Lee stood

“What are you doing here?” I asked, rubbing the sleep off of my eyes

“Came here to see you, what happened to your hand?” he asked back, I let him inside my apartment while he takes the my injured hand in his.

“Sorry I fell asleep, what time is it anyways?” I looked at the clock on the wall to see I have an hour left before I needed to go to their dorm for dinner

I looked back at Mark who was still assessing my hand, a little pout forming on his lips

“Don’t worry about me, it’s your birthday” I say while trying to pull my hand away from his grasp but he just held on tighter

“Doyoung hyung said some aloe will help with the pain, here I got some” I didn’t even the notice the bag he was holding, he set it down on the counter before taking out the medicine

“Come here”

I don’t know why but those two words made my cheeks burn, good thing his focus was back on tending to my injured hand

“Sorry” I mumbled, this made him look at me for a second before going back to applying the medicine on my hand and then proceed to blow some air on it

“What are you saying sorry for?”

“I don’t know, for worrying you, for ruining your birthday. I just wanted to bake you a cake” Looking down on my shoes as if it was the most interesting thing to look at, I didn’t notice how Mark stopped his actions to just stare at me.

Only when I looked back at him I noticed his intense stare, a little smile starting to creep on his face

“Is that how you injured your hand? While baking me a cake?” he asked

“Well no, I burned the cake then you called. I got distracted then accidentally touched the pan” I explained

“You didn’t have to make me a cake” he mumbled, now his hand now longer holding mine but instead he put them on my waist and pulled me closer to him

“Just wanted to do something special for you today” I told him, resting my hands on his chest while fiddling with my fingers

“Just being with you in this day makes it extra special”

I rolled my eyes at his statement, trying hard to hide the fact that my heart is about to beat out of my chest because of what he just said. Mark’s not the type to be flashy about his feelings, but when he does I feel like my world does a full 180.

“No like for real though” he told me again, this time I let out something like a whine making him laugh at me. I just buried my face on his chest trying to hide my burning cheeks

“After all this time you’re still blushing when I say things like that”

“Glad I amuse you”

“You’re too cute, baby”

“Speaking of cute, did you like my gift?” I asked him, lifting my head from his chest to look up at him.

“Did you really have to get me that?” he asked back

“What? It was cute, and it’s so you. Admit it”

“It was cute, but I still don’t know where to wear it”

“Uh at home? You can definitely wear it to the airport. It’s so comfortable, I might get one for myself”

The gift was a lion onesie, I’ve been dying to see him in it. I had to stop myself from giving it earlier.

“You know I voted for farm animals for your dance practice video” I told him, I still think about how cute it would have been

“Lion isn’t a farm animal, baby”

“I- Yea I mean- Whatever. You looked good in those pants anyways so who am I to complain” this time Mark was the one who was blushing, I just laughed at his reaction.

“Sorry I didn’t get to bake you a cake, I’ll get you one on the way back to your dorm. But happy birthday”

“Thank you” he said with the sweetest smile on, I honestly cannot imagine my world without Mark Lee in it. I thank the heavens, well and his parents, for basically blessing us with this guy right here. He just makes this world a whole lot better.

“No, thank you. Thank you for being you, for being here. Life would suck a little more if you weren’t here, I honestly cannot think about what it would be like without you bursting into random giggle fits” this made him laugh again

“I’m serious, hearing you that happy makes me happy. I don’t think I have ever met someone who laughs more than you do”

“You make me happy”

“This isn’t a competition, Lee Minhyung. Today is about you okay, let me smother you for today” taking his face in between my hands, I pulled him closer to me

“Happy birthday, baby. I love you” I whispered, a smile appearing on both of our faces. Before we could get any closer, a phone started to ring totally ruining the moment

It was my phone, I answered it quickly

“Bring Mark back, it’s almost dinner time” Yuta said from the other side of the line

“No, I’m keeping him. Bye” I said then hang up, meanwhile Mark looked confused during the whole exchange through the phone

“We need to go, Yuta might start to haunt me down if we don’t go back. And I’m getting you a cake.”

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