#turning off reblogs so it doesn't get spread anymore

[violentdelightsandviolentends]

Someone Borrowed, Someone Blue.

an engagement party, your childhood best friend, one too many glasses of champagne. what could go wrong?

pairing - childhood bestfriend!steve harrington x female reader

warnings - smut. cursing. cheating. alcohol mention. so much angst… i’d apologise but i’m not sorry.

word count - 3.7k

author’s note - get it? like, something borrowed, something blue… because it’s a wedding… I was half asleep when that popped into my head and I thought it was perfect, personally. I don’t condone cheating irl, but also… it’s your life, do what you want ;)

as always, reblogs are the only way to circulate my fics!! so, if you enjoyed, please consider reblogging. thanks, angels <3

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The moonlight shines down, glinting off the diamond ring settled on your left hand.

Everyone's dancing, singing, laughing, enjoying each other's company in a rare moment of complete happiness. People keep grabbing you, hugging you, reaching for you to offer their congratulations.

Isn't it just so wonderful? Two people completely in love. Ah, to be young again.

The fairy lights twinkle where they're hung across the garden, acres of grass just begging to be decorated. You'd initially protested this venue - a huge country house in the middle of nowhere, with countless rooms and a huge courtyard.

It's just our engagement party, not our wedding. We don't have to be so extravagant.

This isn't extravagant - not for my family, anyway. Just say yes. I'll plan the entire thing, you don't have to worry.

And so you did. Say yes. To his proposal, the venue, anything he suggests. You can't find it in you to say no, to argue, to fight for what you really want. It isn't worth it.

"There you are, my soon to be wife!"

You take a deep breath, pretending the sound of his voice doesn't make you feel sick.

"My soon to be husband."

He can't see the grimace on your face, even though it's there, loud and clear. He can't read you, has never been able to.

"A car has just pulled up. You expecting anyone else?"

You are, but you won't let yourself get your hopes up. So you lie.

"Don't think so."

"Okay, well... you'll save me a dance, won't you? My mom wants to take some pictures."

You nod reluctantly, patting his arm with as much affection as you can muster.

"I think your brother is calling you."

You direct his attention to where his frat boy siblings are, hollering and yelling for him to come over.

"My guys!"

He departs as quickly as he came, leaving a wave of too strong cologne in his wake.

You take a walk from the garden to the front of the house, curiosity peaked. You scan the parking lot, and your heart stops when you spot the car in the corner.

A burgundy 1983 BMW 733i.

He's here.

You spin on your heel, searching almost frantically, when you hear someone clear their throat. You turn around, and there he is.

Leaning against a pillar, stood in a dress shirt and tailored trousers, hair perfectly styled.

Steve Harrington.

You're half convinced you're dreaming. The world moves around you in a daze, crickets chirping and wind blowing gently. You lock eyes with him, and can't fight the grin that spreads across your face.

“Don’t fret, baby. The life of the party has arrived.”

You scoff but almost run towards him, tripping over in your heels. He meets you halfway, arms snaking around your waist to keep you steady as you wrap yourself around him.

He smells the same. Cologne, spearmint, a faint note of diesel from the car. He smells like home.

Past home, you remind yourself. Not anymore. You have a new home now, with a soon to be husband that doesn’t understand you and a soon to be family that is built on morally questionable money and fake niceties. Steve’s a person of your past, a distant memory, a fading dream.

Except he’s stood right in front of you.

He's staring at you with a look in his eyes you can’t quite place. You’ve never seen it before.

"I didn't think you'd come," you whisper, begging yourself to pull away from his embrace. He doesn't let you go far, keeping his arms around your back as if he's worried you'll bolt at any given moment.

"And miss my best friends engagement party? Never."

"Best friends. We're not five anymore, Steve."

You roll your eyes, punching his arm lightly.

"What, I can't call you my best friend anymore?"

He picks you up, spinning you across the gravel of the parking lot. You're dizzy with it, the world passing by you in streaks of shapes and colours.

"Steve!"

"What?" he laughs. "You don't like this, best friend? What's the problem, best friend? Are you dizzy, best friend?"

"Put me down!"

Steve throws you over his shoulder as you both spin, strong hands preventing you from falling.

"Put me down, Steve, please - okay, okay! You're my best friend! Call me best friend all you want, please!"

Steve's crying with laughter, out of breath and rosy cheeked. He places you back on the ground, smoothing your hair down with rough palms.

You inhale carefully, grabbing onto his biceps as an anchor as you gauge your bearings. You look up at him, and lose your breath all over again.

Chest heaving, tongue darting over his bottom lip, hair mussed but still perfectly styled. He looks a picture, an ancient painting, a statue carved from the finest marble.

"I never want you to stop calling me your best friend," you whisper, so quietly that the breeze takes it.

"Then I won't."

Your hand slips down Steve's arm and into his, fingers linking gently.

"I missed you."

"I missed you so much, Birdy. You have no idea."

The childhood nickname shoots a lightning bolt through your heart, shiver running up your back involuntarily.

The two of you would sit and watch cartoons for hours on the floor of Steve's living room, pressing your little heads together to see the TV better. He'd joke that you sounded like Tweety Bird, all sweet and lispy. The nickname was born that day, and stuck ever since.

"How was California?"

"So good. I'll tell you all about it later. How's your engagement party?"

"It's good."

You try to sound convincing but your voice cracks, giving you away instantly. Busted.

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. There's a few people you know back there - from school, the neighbourhood, family. They'll all wanna see you."

"I'll socialise later. Wanna talk to you first."

The intensity in his voice makes you nervous. You realise you're still holding his hand, so you drop it, crossing your arms over your chest.

"You didn't RSVP."

"Didn't get your invite. Travelling."

"I called your mom. She said she'd tell you."

"She didn't."

"She told me she did."

The crickets continue to chirp, gentle breeze blowing your hair into your face. You look at Steve pointedly, unwilling to be the first to break.

"What are you doing here, Steve?"

"It's your engagement party."

"So you've said."

"I haven't seen you in months."

"I tried to call, but you stopped answering."

"Birdy-"

"I'm just saying, Steve. We haven't spoken in months, I feel like you've been point blank ignoring me, I've had to come to terms with the fact that you probably wouldn't be at this party or the wedding and then all of a sudden you just show up? Unannounced?"

"I know how this looks."

"Do you?"

You're not entirely sure where all of this anger has come from, but you can't seem to tamp it down. It's bubbling, simmering, threatening to spill over the surface dramatically any second.

"I wasn't sure I could do this. Any of it."

"Do what?"

"Stand by and watch you make a mistake."

You scoff, laughing at him in disbelief. He's never been one to sugarcoat things, and usually, it's one of your favourite things about him. But not today.

"Don't you fucking dare, Steve."

"Birdy, be real. The guy is a prick. And you want to marry him? You're a smart girl, the smartest person I know. You've got to see that none of this makes any sense."

"So you showed up here to yell at me? Criticise my life choices? Thanks, Steve. Thanks a million. Some best friend, huh?"

"I've done nothing but support you."

"You ran away! Across the country! How is that support?"

"Fine, maybe I can't support straight up stupidity!"

"Am I smart or am I stupid? Which one is it?"

Steve sighs, running his fingers through his hair as he watches you pace the gravel in front of him. You're vibrating with fury now. It's something he's seen before. Something he knows how to navigate better than anyone. He knows you. He knows you need an outlet here.

He also knows that you're never more hyperaware than when you're mad. So, he takes his opportunity.

"I came here to tell you not to marry him."

You stop dead in your tracks, shaking your head in denial.

"...Why, Steve? Why would you say that?"

"You know why."

"No."

You take a deep breath and will yourself not to cry. In the garden, you can hear people laughing, singing along to some 70s pop song you've never liked. You pray silently that no one comes looking for you.

You take a step closer to Steve, standing up straight.

"Say it."

He looks at you incredulously, shocked by your sudden defiance.

"Say it, Steve. If you came all this way to say it, then fucking say it."

Steve steps into you, closing down the space. You don't move, determined not to back down.

"You're going to hate me if I say it, Birdy."

"I don't give a fuck anymore. Say. It."

Steve runs his tongue over his bottom lip, never once breaking eye contact with you. The silence seems to stretch on infinitely, thick and blanketing like fresh snow falling.

"I'm in love with you."

You feel like you've been punched in the gut. You take a deep breath and try to stay on two feet, wobbling where you stand. Finally, you find your voice.

"Fuck you, Steve Harrington. Fuck. You."

He laughs, but there's no humour in it.

"Yeah."

"How dare you? How dare you come to my engagement party and start confessing your feelings? You could have told me anytime, but you chose today?"

He goes to interrupt but you hold a finger up, effectively shutting him up.

"How long, huh? How long have you been in love with me?"

Steve's trembling, chest stuttering with the force of his confession.

"For as long as I can remember."

You haven't looked away from him once. You're frozen in place, suspended in the moment.

"No you haven't."

"You're gonna tell me how I feel now, Birdy?"

"Yeah, Steve, I am. Because I don't believe you. You're King Steve, ladies man, notorious player. You were never seen with the same girl twice in high school. Don't you remember? Sneaking into my room at night, whispering under my blankets about your latest hookup, telling me all the dirty details?"

"I remember," he whispers, voice laced with something like sadness. "Of course I remember."

"You don't get to tell me this now. It's not fair, Steve."

"Why not, huh?"

"Because I've always been in love with you! Always."

Steve stumbles backwards, dizzy and disorientated.

"No you haven't."

"You're gonna tell me how I feel now?" you laugh in disbelief. "I've always been in love with you. Everyone knows it. My parents, your parents, all of our friends... I think the goddamn mailman knew, Steve!"

"I didn't."

"Blissful ignorance," you chuckle humourlessly.

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Because I knew it wouldn't change anything."

Steve's eyes go wide as he keels over, as if the wind has been knocked out of him.

"Wouldn't change anything? Birdy, it... I-I can assure you it... It would have changed everything."

You both look at each other, breathless and riddled with confusion. There's something flowing through your veins, something unintelligible, something unrecognisable.

"Why would you do this today?" you choke out, sobs threatening to break free. "Of all the days, Steve."

"Because I'm going insane!" he yells, voice raising. "I can't sleep, I can't eat, I can't function knowing that you're going to marry a man you don't love. It's ruining my life, Birdy!"

"You don't think it's ruining mine? Huh?"

You take a breath, very aware that if you shout anymore, multiple people are going to come running from the garden.

"This is selfish, Steve. And you're not selfish."

He looks down at you, bottom lip wobbling.

"I am when it comes to you. Always have been."

"You're breaking my fucking heart, baby."

You choke out the words before bursting into tears, sobs wracking your frame. Steve grabs your hand and guides you to the stone steps, sitting you down next to him. Against better judgment, he slings an arm around your shoulders, pulling you close.

He smells so familiar, so comforting, that it only makes you cry harder. You bury your face in his chest, fingers tangled into his dress shirt, holding on for dear life.

"I'm sorry," he's mumbling. "I'm so fucking sorry. I had to. I really had to."

"I know," you're muttering back. "I know you did. I know."

You lift your head to look at him only to find he's crying too, years of emotion dripping down his face. You wipe his tears with your thumbs, your heart shattering at the sight in front of you.

Steve's only made you cry once before. In ninth grade, you'd stupidly assumed that the two of you would go to the prom together. Steve had made a joking comment about always being your date, and you hadn't questioned it. Then, one Friday night, he'd snuck into your room to tell you excitedly that he'd asked Lizzy Buchanan to the dance, and she'd said yes. You'd burst into tears immediately, much to your teenage embarrassment, willing yourself to play your cards closer to your chest. Steve had crumbled instantly, crying because you were.

That's how it's always been. He cries, you cry. You cry, he cries. He's just not usually the cause of the tears.

"I'm sorry, Birdy," he chokes. "This was the only way."

"I know," you soothe, rubbing circles into his wet cheeks with your fingers. "I know. You're not the villain here, Steve. You never were."

His eyes are trained to yours, silent communication passing back and forth. The two of you have always had the ability to practically read each other's minds.

You're not sure who moves first - perhaps it's the universe, pulling you together by the strings woven into your chests - but suddenly your lips are melded together, moving as if it's the easiest thing in the world. Steve's clinging to you as if you're his life source, a man in the desert without water.

You tangle your fingers into his hair to tug him impossibly closer, eyes fluttering when he groans, deep and visceral. He spreads his legs and pulls you between them, both of you slotting together like pieces of a jigsaw puzzle. Your tears are dancing onto each other's cheeks, mixing like rain water and gasoline.

Suddenly, you yank yourself from his grip, standing up and smoothing down your silky dress. Steve prepares himself for the yelling, the screaming, a slap that he most definitely deserves.

Instead, he's met with you, chest heaving, skin warm, eyes heavy. You're looking at him expectantly.

"Come with me," you croak, voice hoarse and untrustworthy.

You grab his hand and slink through the front door, up the grand staircase and into a room with a heavy oak door. He follows you obediently, confused but completely trusting.

It's your hotel room. A marriage suite. A spacious, windowed room, with makeup scattered across the vanity and suitcases half unpacked on the floor. The bed is still made, which makes Steve breathe a sigh of relief. He hasn't had you here. The room isn't marred.

The minute you shut the door you're back on Steve, shoving him up against the hard wood. He grabs handfuls of your ass and spins you around, backing you into the cold surface behind you for stability. He lifts you easily, wrapping your legs around his waist as he kisses you again.

Steve trails his lips down your neck as you rock your hips, desperate to find some friction. You whine gently, fingers tugging at his hair a little rougher than intended to get your message across.

"What do you need, honey?" he murmurs, afraid to disrupt the atmosphere.

"You."

Steve throws his head back as he groans, exposing his throat to you. You waste no time in nipping up the expanse of it, sinking your teeth in with no regard for the consequences. You're too far gone now, not worried about looking back.

Walking backwards, Steve tosses you onto the bed, chuckling when you almost bounce off of it. He unbuttons and strips his shirt, pulling his belt from the loops as he goes. You can only lie there and watch, wondering when your best friend became less of a boy and more of a man. He's all corded muscle and tanned skin, freckled and perfect.

Steve crawls between your legs, kissing you tenderly.

"Wanna take my time with you," he murmurs between kisses. "Can't right now. Will, though. Promise."

You feel as if there's electricity crackling across your skin, pulsing and alive. It's never felt like this with anyone. It never will again.

"Promise?"

You can't help the slight insecurity that colours your voice, young and unsure.

"I promise, Birdy. Cross my heart."

He takes your hand in his and places it over his chest, as if to solidify his point.

You nod and kiss him again, desperate to have every inch of his skin on yours.

Steve shimmies your underwear down your legs, tossing them behind him somewhere. Shucking his trousers off, he pushes your dress up and around your waist, groaning when he gets a good look at you.

"Prettiest girl in the world. He doesn't deserve you. Never did."

"And you do?"

"I'll spend every day for the rest of time proving that I do."

With that he's pushing into you, sliding home with one smooth thrust. Both of you gasp, grabbing onto the other person to use them as an anchor.

"Please, Steve," you're whispering. "Give me everything. I want it all."

"You've got no idea how long I've been waiting for this."

"I do," you laugh, "I do. Because I've been waiting just as long."

Steve chuckles and leans down to kiss you, slipping his tongue into your mouth to memorise the way you taste. There's remnants of champagne on your lips, along with the minty lip gloss you've loved for as long as he can remember.

He wastes no time setting a steady rhythm, thrusts deep and measured. You rake your nails down his back, clawing at this skin, praying silently that you leave your mark. Little do you know, you staked your claim on him a long, long time ago.

"S'good, Stevie," you whine. "Fuck, so good."

"Does he make you come? Does he even try?"

You shake your head frantically, closing your eyes when Steve laughs dryly.

"Didn't think so. He can't make you feel the way I can, baby. He'll never be able to."

His words are only pushing you closer and closer to the edge, red hot heat building at the pit of your stomach. Steve places one hand at the base of your throat, the heavy weight of it causing your eyes to roll back.

Your sweat slicked skin is plastered to his, every inch of you pressed together. Steve leans down to rest his forehead against yours, panting into each other's mouths.

"I love you," he breathes, hips getting quicker. "I love you. Fuck, I love you."

"I love you," you sob, back arching as you find your release. Stars dance across your vision as you tighten around Steve, nails leaving crescent moons on the skin of his shoulders.

Steve's right there with you, back flexing and fingers leaving their prints on your hips as he groans. It's the prettiest sound you've ever heard. Your mind loops it for you, playing it on repeat as he collapses his weight on top of your body.

"I meant it," he mutters against your damp chest. "I do love you. Always have."

You kiss his forehead gently, smoothing the hair away from his face.

"I meant it too. I love you. You taught me what love was in the first place, Steve."

He leans up to press his lips to yours, tender and honey sweet.

You realise the gravity of the situation all of a sudden, your heart rate increasing in Steve's ear.

"Hey, hey. Birdy. Don't panic, okay? We'll figure this out."

You think for a moment, weighing up your options in your head. Unexpectedly, you're jumping out of bed, fixing your dress and slipping on your underwear and heels.

"What are you doing, babe?"

You adjust your hair and swipe your fingers under your eyes to salvage your makeup in the mirror, turning to face the man who's now dressing himself frantically.

"Have you had a drink tonight?"

"No, I drove here."

"Perfect."

You grab your purse and stand by the door, waiting for him to follow. When he looks at you in pure confusion, you chuckle.

"Let's run away."

"Birdy... what?"

"Steve. You heard me. Let's. Run. Away."

He scans your face for any sign of hesitation, but all he finds is love. Adoration. Assuredness. That's all the confirmation he needs.

He runs at you, picking you up and spinning you around. Grabbing his hand, the two of you sneak down the stairs, slipping out of the front door as quietly as possible.

You throw yourself into the front seat of his BMW, vibrating with adrenaline as Steve starts up the engine. It roars to life, and you're very aware that people are going to come looking for you.

But you don't care.

Steve links your fingers, resting your intertwined hands in his lap as he reverses. You go to look back towards the garden, but you stop yourself.

"Can't move forward if you're always looking back, right?"

Steve laughs, leaning over to kiss your warm cheek.

"Truer words have never been spoken, Birdy."

He brings the car to a stop before you begin down the winding driveway, looking at you carefully.

"You ready?"

You take a deep breath, grinning at him.

"I've been ready since we were five years old."

He smiles at you, bright and blinding, and there's no doubt in your mind that you've made the right choice.

Can't move forward if you keep looking back, after all.

@enigmaticloki @joekeerysslut @s-trawberryv-eins @wintressoldier36 @mangomastani

#steve harrington smut #steve harrington imagine #steve harrington x reader #steve harrington fluff #steve harrington #steve harrington x y/n #steve harrington x reader fluff #steve harrington x reader smut #steve harrington angst #steve harrington x reader angst #steve harrington x female reader #steve harrington x you #bestfriend!steve harrington x reader #steve harrington x bestfriend reader #childhood bestfriend steve harrington #stranger things fluff #stranger things smut #stranger things x reader

[vash-yuu]

— Forever my god —

yandere kitsune servant! kurami x kitsune god! reader

[[ warnings: ]] 2 cuss words, esl, spelling and grammar mistakes, yandere but he isn't that intense(i think)

[[ a/n: ]] so its been awhile huh,,,,school kicked me so hard fr but thankfully its almost the end of the sy and then i go to shs which im kinda dejected about but oh well. Hope yall enjoy reblogs and likes are always appreciated!! (ESP COMMENTS PLS COMMENT)

I also really like how this turned out so i might write more in a bulleted form than story and might make a part 2 of you living with him if yall want to

Kurami, the most loyal servant in your shrine. He basically feels like a househusband at this point with how close he is.

He always flaunts his hair, his eyes, his ears and tail; all different shades of the color chestnut.

"My beloved! I changed my hairstyle for you today! Do you like it?" That's weird, it was the style of the new servant yesterday...

"Where's the new servant you ask? Haha my goddess you're so funny! There's no new servant silly~" Because their body is already burned and sacrificed to you but you don't need to know that!

Kurami, who, seductively, shows you his tail; swishing it from side-to-side to, supposedly, show how clean and fluffy it is. He wants you to look at his ass

Going back to how he's like a househusband, he basically does everything for you! Cleaning, cooking, bathing—you don't even see your other servants anymore due to him doing all the chores that involves seeing you.

It got to the point where you found him overbearing. You tried to tell him to tone it down

key word: tried.

"Tone it down?? Your grace did I hear you correctly? I can't possibly tone it down!! I need to take care of you to maintain your beauty! No one else can do what I can!"

You were pissed at this point. You reminded him of his place—a servant who just does things as told and doesn't intrude into the personal life of their master.

He was hurt—no, heartbroken!! How can his goddess, the one he devoted his blood, sweat and tears to just treat them like that?!

He was beyond devastated doing minimal tasks that didn't include seeing or getting near you. He couldn't take getting treated like this...if you're gonna behave like this then he has no choice but to take matters into his own hands.

One by one, your servants start to disappear but for some reason the sacrifices to your name are getting bigger by the number...what the fuck is going on?

Rumors then start to spread about you, people saying that you kill off your servants and force people to sacrifice them in your name—which is literally bullshit but unfortunately they believed it.

Your shrine: in ruins, your followers: gone, your god status: what god status? You never thought the day would come where everyone would forget and move on from you.

You were confused, eyes about to cry a river until you see a shadow in the distance, clearing the pathway as they walk.

Is that...Kurami?

You run up to him—begging, pleading for forgiveness about how you treated him when he was the only devoted one from your servants.

It never felt so good to have you rely on him again. Fuck, he might just get a hard on looking at you.

He brings you to his home, where you'll forever temporarily stay until you build a following again. Like hell he'd let you do that.

"My goddess, even when the world is against you I'd be by your side until death—no, not even death can keep you from me. So, stay with me, okay?"

#yandere x you #yandere x reader #yandere #x reader #x you #imagines #yandere kitsune x reader #yandere kitsune x you #kitsune #kitsune x reader #kitsune x you #story #writeblr #writing #writers on tumblr

[lol-jackles]

Whenever Anons tell me that Jared fans are just as bad as AAs and hellers, I always ask for receipts.

The reason they won't ever be able to provide this (besides the ones Jai & co have been exposed as having faked to frame Jared fans...) is they don't exist (I know you know this lol, just making a general statement). The thing is, AA's are soooo beyond sensitive that they literally think saying we don't like Jensen's outfit at a con, or that he looks tired, or that he's had botox is "hate". You say anything even remotely critical about Jensen? You must hate him. They take such personal offense to things that are barely a slight to Jensen as hate.

Jared fans on the other hand, have had over 16 years of dealing with the hate and insults and biting their tongues. They have a much thicker skin. They are getting more assertive and pushing back more nowadays, but they still had to stay quiet for 15 years to keep the peace because, for some reason, it fell on them (much like it falls on Jared).

Btw this is exactly how and why I left the Jensen fandom completely. I was a Jensen leaning J2 fan when I joined the fandom. Problem was that I didn't immediately turn on blinders to Jensen's behavior when I joined (like a good little Jensen fan is expected to). So I made a mildly critical comment about him and was dogpiled. I was told I wasn't a real fan and that I actually hated him and was just pretending to like him. I was called some pretty gross stuff and told I wasn't wanted there. And from people I really didn't expect (at the time I didn't expect it at least). That's when I realized there weren't a lot of "safe spaces" in the Jensen fandom and it was exhausting trying to get news about him from sites where I also had to see (tagged) Jared hate and them attacking other fans like me. It was just easier to not bother anymore.

I actually saw a few posts recently from TB/GenV fans who were really annoyed that Jensen had a cameo in GenV because it's annoying how he takes over and all the gifsets and everything are all him. They didn't want him on the spinoff because that was a show mostly safe from his fans. It took them less than one season to piss off TB and GenV fans. Jared fans put up with it for 15 years.

Thank you for sharing your history. This completely jives with the many private convo I had with Dean/Jensen fans laminating the lack of safe space within their fandom that doesn't include Destiel and/or hating on Sam/Jared (X) but also expected to never discuss Dean or Jensen other than a perfect victim because AAs viewed themselves as perfect victims that the world must change and cater to them. The only advice I could provide them was to go to original posts by Sam girls (because at least they respect the show's canon) and look at who are reblogging or liking with Dean's avatar or his name.

Yeah I never understood why it fell on Sam girls to keep the fandom peace by appeasing the demented Sam haters. Just like it fell on Jared to protect Jensen from Destiel hellers' campaign to slander Jensen as a homophobe (*wave hello to MallorytoyourMickey aka Heidi aka High-D aka my buddy!*) but they won't protect Jared from slanderous lies spread by their own fandom on social media.

Which is why AAs, hellers, and even Kripke get the shock of their lives when Sam/Jared girls do strike back because they're like cats - chill and indifferent but have murder mittens and Freddy Kruger hands when rudely poked.

I’ve joked that Jared’s stans’ response to the Prequel debacle was “I’VE BEEN FREED!"  They no longer have to support and defend Jensen especially now that SPN is over, then the Prequel debacle was the cherry on top because it gave them the ultimate permission to no longer do the geek social fallacy thing. And I like to think that Dean fans are also free from Ackles Army's death grip of the character now that they're moving on to The Boys fandom.

Speaking of which, I'm not surprised to hear TB/GenV fans are annoyed by the AAs. The soap opera and SPN fandom couldn't stand them, why would TB fandom be any different? As long as AAs view themselves as perfect victims, they don't believe they need to change their attitude.

#supernatural #fandom history #Ackles Army #Jensen Ackles stans #Jared Padalecki

[daisyanonnl]

THIS IS A COPY AND PASTED REPOST FOR THE PURPOSE OF SPREADING THE MESSAGE AS PORTER HAS NOW TURNED OFF REBLOGS ON THE ORIGINAL POST, THEREFORE MAKING IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR OTHERS REBLOG MY STATEMENT UNDERNEATH HIS POST. THIS VERSION WILL CONTAIN AN EDIT WITH ADDITIONAL INFORMATION.

Hello, I am the victim in this situation. I am using an alternate account in order to protect my identity. I planned not to address this, but I feel like I need to in order to leave no room for misinterpretation and to bring myself mental peace. Trigger warning for grooming and tickling. Please read at your own discretion!!

Me and Porter had been friends for half a year. I cut ties with them soon after when I realized what was happening to me. This was the DM I received from a concerned individual within his Discord server that really solidified the gravity of the situation for me:

They then proceeded put me in contact with another concerned party after this DM. One of concerns they showed within the DM regarding the "sketch pages" is referring to these sketches that Porter made featuring both of our Welcome Home characters made in an online drawing game.

The images above showcase his adult OC Porter tickling my OC, who is a teenager. Given the age of my character and the fact that I am a teenager too, he shouldn't have made these. Regardless of if I started it or not. The responsibility lies with the adult, not the child. No adult should ever indulge in these actions alongside a child, as it's highly inappropriate. Especially since it has been proven that tickling has previously been a fetish for him. Even if it isn't anymore, that doesn't negate the inappropriate nature of his actions towards me.

Another concern raised later was regarding a "fanfiction" Porter wrote including his OC, and a caricature of me being tickled by his character. Again, the character included is supposed to represent me - a minor. I will warn in advance that the screenshots below may or may not be slightly out of order.

Think of this what you will, but this is not appropriate behavior to engage in with a child, regardless of the circumstances. Porter has not deleted this fic, which makes me highly uncomfortable to know that he is actively has this saved even after everything that he has been found guilty of. Another individual within the server voice chat advised Porter not to write this, as it would be extremely alarming, and not okay. This was said when he mentioned writing it, before he actually did. He agreed, even acknowledging the dangerous nature of doing this. And yet, he still decided to go through with it later. This, however, barely scrapes the surface of the disgusting and alarming nature of his DM's and messages in his server towards me. I will apply a trigger warning accordingly for grooming with what is about to be shown.

(His profile picture is censored because it shows artwork made by an individual who is uninvolved, and I do not wish for them to be found via this artwork and possibly harassed.)

He has stated before multiple times within voice chat that if our messages were exposed into the public, he could get into serious trouble. Despite this, he persisted. His discord admin excused his actions on account that I "consented" and was comfortable with this behavior. But the glaring problem here is that minors cannot consent.

It was in his hands to make sure he kept me safe, and he failed to do so. He knew that I am a vulnerable, neglected, touch-starved and attention-starved teenager, and that I would not question him. No matter his "intentions" with me, it is still clear to see that he groomed me. Grooming does not always need to be explicitly sexual to be considered as such. Grooming is not a black and white issue. It's a very nuanced subject and can be hard to detect by even adults. He has also compared our interactions to "sibling tickle fights".

I've personally never seen siblings tickle eachother while calling one another "cute", using pet names, and putting one another in a "lee" and "ler" category. These are behaviors that I've seen strictly in the fetishistic areas of the tickling community. I've also never seen this behavior shared between parents and their children. Even if this was "play" between siblings or parents and their kids, it wouldn't make it any less alarming. This is not simply "innocent horseplay" as he tries to say. This is something far more sinister.

I come from a very broken home. Porter made me feel special. He made me feel safe. He made me feel cared about and loved, more than any adult figure in my life has made me feel, and for this reason I grew heavily attached to him. He knew full well about my home situation and my fragile mental state, and this is why he felt content to take advantage of me. He was also aware about my emotional attachment to him. Himself, as well as his close friend circle who were also very close to me, acknowledged that he is careless in how he interacts with younger individuals. This gives even more reasons for him to stop interacting with minors altogether.

Another individual within his friend circle, who works closely with preschoolers may I add, has been defending this disgusting behavior and insisting that what happened to me wasn't grooming, and that I'm "hurting real victims" by saying this. This individual goes by Beauregardent/Museicorne/Darlingdoeling on most platforms; one being Twitter.

This message was forwarded to me by an uninvolved third party.) This absolutely shattered me. It felt as if they literally spat in my face. I am absolutely appalled and horrified that this is an opinion held by someone who works with toddlers between the ages of 3-5. It does not matter if it was "intentional" or not, what matters is that he was still complicit in acting in this way towards me. The fact that he has stated many times that his behavior could get him in trouble, is very evident that he knew what he was doing was wrong.

Beauregardent and Porter's server moderator have both stated that he committed "groomer actions" but that he's not actually a bonafide groomer. This point is obviously chocked full of nonsensical semantics, and to say this is spitting in the face of not only me, but other victims who have been in my shoes and have been traumatized. It's literally like saying: "Well, the kidnapper did kidnapper actions, but they're not a kidnapper! They had good intentions when they kidnapped that child!"

Surprise, surprise. The floor is made of floor.

The fact that Porter has turned off and hidden certain comments on this post shows me that he is not willing to face the consequences and rightful backlash from this situation. He has proved that he is only trying to save face.

This situation has traumatized me greatly and has caused me extreme emotional distress. These are the effects of grooming. The individuals who confronted me about this situation are also victims of grooming, and have compared their situations to my own to further emphasis their concerns. I have also spoken with many other victims of grooming after this situation, and all have expressed their grief and heartbreak for me. A majority of them approached me first.

This is really all I have to say for now, and if any additional information is needed I will update this post accordingly. I believe I've covered the entire basis of this situation, on my side at least.

This post will serve as a compilation of necessary evidence for others to view and make educated decisions. As well as to make my statement and my opinions, and my sheer pain with this situation be known. I don't wish to address this any further for my own mental peace and safety. This account will remain, as I do not plan on letting my pain go unheard, nor do I want Porter to have ample room to misinterpret and get away with what he did to me. I am healing. I'm taking the necessary steps to feel better after what happened. Thank you.

EDIT:::

I know I said I wouldn't address this further, but I feel it is necessary to include an extra piece of information which has been brought to my attention.

It is apparent that Porter is attempting to make a comeback even after all of this happened. This is very concerning. I'd like others, especially minors, to be aware and stay safe. If you click the notes on this post and view the accounts of individuals that liked it, you will find that some of them happen to be minors. I'm very worried for them, and frankly appalled that Porter is trying to sneak his way back onto Tumblr after everything he's been found guilty of. He also still has minors in his Discord server - one of which is being protected by an adult who stated they were only staying there to keep the minor safe in Porters presence, as the minor is not willing to leave the server.

After I contributed my statement to his original post, he switched off the reblogs. I was already well aware that he wasn't willing to take proper accountability for his actions, but this has given me even more proof of such.

This is all for now, and I may make more updates if anything vital comes to light. Love you all. Thank you for hearing out my story. Please stay safe and cautious. Especially to all of you younger individuals.

#Porter rambles #Sillysquealingswine #grooming awareness #child grooming awareness #grooming

[rollercoasterwords]

Hi! I found your blog through the female rage substack article that you posted and I’m curious about a couple things (so I hope the tone of this ask will read as genuine/non-confrontational etc).

I really liked the article and the anti-gender essentialist content, so I looked through the others and eventually found your jegulus article (which I read and also liked) but I was sort of surprised to see that you are a part of the hp/marauders fandom. For me personally, everything related to that franchise has just been tainted since the whole jkr terf debacle really took off. I was big on hp when I was younger and wolfstar is a ship/dynamic that I enjoyed back then, so I’d probably like your stuff if I were to read it. But I decided some time ago to give any and all hp content the chop, because to me it didn’t feel right to engage with it anymore. So I was just wondering how you feel in that regard, if you don’t mind sharing. I don’t have anyone in my internet content circle that still actively posts about hp and if irl friends still enjoy it then it’s not something we talk about, so I’d just like to know how you juggle the ‘two sides’ in that sense of your trans-positive/anti-essentialist beliefs and fandom content that’s still so intrinsically connected to jkr and her politics. (Also, sorry if you’ve answered a question like this before. I scrolled through your blog a bit, but if yes then not far enough.)

Anyway, hope you’re well and I’ll probably keep an eye out for any future essays on your substack even if I don’t follow you on here. cheers! (and thanks for the “playing the whore” book rec, I’ll be looking into that. a rec from my end would be paul b. preciado's "can the monster speak". it's the written version of a speech he tried to give at a Freudian psychoanalysis conference about the position trans people occupy in psychoanalysis before being booed off stage. it was short and pretty intriguing, in case you're interested/haven't heard of it yet.)

hi! happy 2 hear u enjoyed the female rage essay--i wasn't expecting it to spread as much as it did + had to turn off reblogs for my own peace of mind 2 keep terfs away from my blog, but it's nice to know there are still people getting something out of it. also appreciate the book rec--that definitely sounds up my alley + i'm excited to check it out!

and i'll do my best to answer your question about hp, but i'm gonna put it under a cut because i know this is a contentious topic + i have a feeling my answer's gonna get long--so if anyone doesn't want 2 read abt my conflicting hp-fandom thoughts, just scroll away please xx

so, quite honestly, i'm in agreement with you that the entire franchise is tainted by jkr. the truth is that it was never really my intention to join the fandom--i read a single fic because it went viral on tiktok, then decided to rewrite the fic from another character's pov just for fun. at that point, i hadn't read any other hp fic and had never been involved in any kind of online fandom space, and although i'd read the hp books + watched the movies growing up i hadn't touched them in years + was so far removed from the franchise that i vaguely remembered hearing jkr had said some terfy stuff, but wasn't aware of the extent to which her politics were like. actively and significantly causing real-life harm.

anyway, i'd done a rewrite for fun of another story i liked and had posted it on ao3, and that had received a handful of people commenting + talking about the story with me as i wrote but had remained pretty self-contained + small. i was expecting the same sort of thing with the hp fic i rewrote, but instead someone posted about it on tiktok and it went viral, and then suddenly there were thousands of people reading every ch update and hundreds of comments. like i said, i had never been involved in an online fandom space before, so i sort of awkwardly stumbled into it and tried to figure out what i was doing as i finished up writing the fic. this was at a point in my life where i'd recently moved to a different country and had to go back in the closet after being publicly out for years, and this online fandom space became my only queer community and a bit of a lifeline in that way. i started making actual friends and talking to people + getting more deeply involved in the community aspect of things.

at the same time, i started actually educating myself on jkr + her politics + her impact, and the more i learned the more uncomfortable i became with being part of anything hp-related. now, i've been writing hp fic for almost two years and 'active' in the fandom for ~one and a half, and despite being grateful for the friends i've made and treasuring the space i've been able to cultivate, i've become increasingly disenchanted with 'the fandom' as a whole and have increasingly found it to be a hostile space, so i've sort of taken a step back from broader engagement and more + more have limited my interaction to just my mutuals here on tumblr. unfortunately, i think many of the 'bad parts' of this fandom are somewhat built-in because of the source material; there are a lot of people who agree with jkr's politics to varying extents and that can make it kind of a miserable place to be sometimes. i know many people insist that hp can be completely removed from jkr, but i don't think that's the case, and i've talked on my blog before about the fact that her politics are built into the very foundations of the text, so i think it's necessary to acknowledge her influence if we want to actually engage with hp at all in a way that isn't just perpetuating her politics.

all that being said, the point i'm at currently is that i'm not really sure that this fandom is a space i want to be a part of forever. again--i understand how it can be lifeline for some people and a queer community they might not have elsewhere, because that's been the case for me. but for me personally, as much as i value my own carved-out space, it doesn't completely outweigh the negatives that i have found myself coming into contact with more and more in this fandom. writing hp fic is also something that i keep strictly separate from 'real life,' contained solely in this online space, because i know that any engagement with hp is a red flag for many, many trans people and i don't want to bring it outside of this space. within this online space, i don't keep it a secret that i write hp fic; it's right at the top of my blog so that anyone who wants to can easily block and unfollow me. i only post my fics on ao3, where they are clearly tagged as harry potter fanfiction, and i only post about hp fic + fandom stuff on this blog, which was specifically created for that purpose. i've requested that people no longer post about my hp fics on platforms like tiktok where the algorithm could send it out onto anyone's fyp, and that request is also in my pinned faq. keeping my hp fic as contained as possible to only people who are already engaging with hp fic is one way that i try to mitigate any harm that might be caused by my fics contributing to hp's ongoing popularity.

the other ways i try to mitigate potential harm are by actively discouraging people from giving any financial support to hp + jkr and by being very vocal about my politics on this page, so that anyone who is following me will be getting pro-trans and anti-gender essentialism politics along with any hp engagement. i also don't engage with hp uncritically; i am specifically critical of the shitty politics in the books both in my posts on this blog and my fics themselves. i don't make it a secret that i think the books are politically rotten all the way down through to the foundations.

none of this is to say that there's, like...a Right Way to engage with this content or a set of rules that, if followed, Absolve All Shittiness. this is just an explanation of the personal evaluations i've had to weigh when it comes to deciding how i'm going to interact with content that is fundamentally opposed to my own politics. and again, i don't blame people who think that any amount of engagement is morally untenable and completely block it out. this is a growing source of cognitive dissonance in my own life, and i'm increasingly considering whether/for how much longer i want to continue to write fic + be involved in hp fandom. but for the time being, i'm still here + still writing fic, and i guess my feeling is that any harm that fic causes is a drop in the bucket, and even if i were to stop writing it wouldn't necessarily have a huge impact either way. i'm just some random guy online like everyone else; even though i talk about politics, that doesn't mean that i'm asking to be held up as some sort of moral standard, nor do i think anyone should be expected to be 100% politically perfect in every action they take--like, for me, writing hp fic kind of falls into the same category as like...eating mcdonalds even though i think factory farming is fucked, or buying + wearing makeup sometimes even though i think the beauty industry is fundamentally corrupt, or paying to see the new guardians of the galaxy movie in theaters even though i think marvel movies are us military propaganda. i don't think "no ethical consumption under capitalism" is an excuse to completely abandon any attempt to mitigate the harm our actions might cause, but it does matter to me the way in which someone is engaging with a fundamentally broken/corrupt piece of media beyond simply whether or not they're engaging at all. at the end of the day, it's up to everyone on their own to evaluate where they draw the line on hp, and i am not looking to make that judgment for anybody else considering that my own thoughts + feeling about it are still changing.

#ask

[buckyhoney]

𝐚𝐭𝐭𝐚𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥, 𝐟.𝐜

a/n: im a whore for this man, he can whatever the fuck he wants to me & i’d thank him

based on these little blurbs i did #1 #2

pairing: frank castle x needy!reader

reblogs/feedback/likes are greatly appreciated & highly encouraged! however, DO NOT repost/steal ANY of my fics!

18+ warning

warnings: 18+, language, unprotected sex, bondage, overstimulation, masturbation (f), degrading kink, light praising kink, use of sex toys, sorry for any missed typos!

words: 1.2k

the last couple of days, you've been needier than normal. craving his coarse palms on your body- roaming. wanted him to throw you around like a rag doll- be his little fuck toy.

embarrassed to ask him, you kept quiet- and your legs squeezed shut. determined to let whatever this overwhelming need for him to pass. masturbating, when he went to the store or to finish business with god, knows who. the moment you heard the door rustling, your fingers disappearing from your clit.

the vibrator and toys sit in frank's end table drawer- taunting you.

frank knew. oh, he knew by the way you wouldn't be as affectionate with him. quick pecks and no cuddling or hands on him. frank was smart enough to know how much you needed him.

he found enjoyment in seeing you worked up, trying to prove you didn't need him- but he wasn't gonna let you off easy.

the less touchy you became, the more he became- kissing your neck, rubbing your inner thigh, doing pull-ups in the doorway of your bedroom, and whispering how much he wanted to stretch out your pussy and how he wanted to see you cry from how good he made you feel.

his favorite was when he'd graze over your clit when you were laying bed, slowly rubbing circles with his thumb. when he'd hear your small pants and your hips gently roll into his fingers- he'd just get up and go make breakfast or grab a drink.

he loved seeing the concentration on your face- trying to calm yourself down, squirming ever so lightly.

torturing you was his favorite activity.

the moans and whines left your mouth carelessly- loud and desperate to cum. the frustration boiled over and you couldn't take it anymore. you're on the bed, sprawled out with the wand pressed to your clit.

lost in your own little world and the sounds of your whines, you didn't hear the door open and close.

frank chuckles to himself, you had finally cracked- and he was going to have his fun with you.

frank dropped the keys on the kitchen counter and his bag by the door. the shirt he was wearing lands on the floor.

"i knew you'd crack eventually," the rugged voice causes you to jolt and lose your orgasm.

"fuck you frank! i was so close!" the pathetic whine makes him chuckle.

"don't worry, i'll have you begging me to stop," he crouches down, pulling the rope from underneath the bed.

"frank..." the warning tone doesn't phase him- he continues to fix the knot on the loops on the end of the headboard.

"wanna cum or not? cause i can leave," you wished he was joking, but he was serious. he'd leave you tied up and crying from how many times he edged you.

"no. i wanna cum," you grumble and pout.

soon, your wrists and ankles are tied down, leg spread wide. when you thought being tied was going to be the worst part of the night, you saw the wand in his hand and the ducted tape.

the two items, soaking you instantly.

pulling on a piece of duct tape long enough to wrap around your thigh, frank places the vibrator (that is still on) on your clit.

"oh shit!" a smirk is plastered on his face; he wraps the tape around your thigh and around the wand- securing it down.

once satisfied with the placement, he turns the toy up a few notches. chills cover your body, pebbling your nipples.

removing the rest of his clothes, frank sits in the chair in the corner of the room. watching you twitch and jerk your hips. your eyes could barely stay open as the first orgasm rolls over you.

"frank! please!" the arousal drip on the sheets, leaving a wet spot.

frank just watches you plead and eyes rolling back. it became hard to think about anything else other than the pleasure between your thighs. your dripping hole pulsing around nothing- your chest is heavy as you're gasping for breath.

"frank- i-i want you, please- turn it- turn it off!" every few words, you're interrupted by a cry- the vibrations make your legs tremble.

by the end of your second orgasm, you're yanking on the restraints and begging for him to turn it off. frank just sits, slowly stroking himself.

"ah, i think you can give me one more, just one more than you can have this cock- how does that sound?" he's taunting you, knowing that you can barely speak.

the pornographic sob and your back arching tells frank your third orgasm rolls through you. he can see your legs shaking and hears your blubbering whines.

"attagirl! i knew you could give me a third," he beams proudly at your heaving chest and sweaty body.

he switches off the toy he grabs the towel from the chair. whipping away the access juices, he cups your sopping wet cunt- bringing your body down while you're gasping for air, tugging on the restraints

as your body recovers from the assault on your now swollen, clit- frank unties your wrists and ankles.

"i fucking hate you," is all you manage to mumble.

"keep telling yourself that," he hovers over your body, looking down at the mess in between your thighs.

"what a filthy girl, i just cleaned you up, and you're already dripping," dipping his hand between your thighs,

underneath him, frank positions his cock at your hole. your legs wrapped around his torso- bucking your hips into his. he enters you slowly before he thrusts at an agonizingly slow pace.

building you up all the way- just to pull you down by pulling completely out. the pathetic attempts of jerking your hips upwards to get some relief made him laugh,

"i stop for a second, and you try to fuck yourself?" he rams into you, filling you entirely. the sudden fullness makes your eyes roll back and your back arch.

"that what you wanted?" the inability to make a noise only makes the teasing worse.

back inside you, your walls clench around his cock- squeezing him. frank grunts with every thrust. your grip around his cock pushes him closer to his high but holding back till you cum again.

you've entered another world; your hips meet his half way- desperate to be filled again.

"my cock making you feel that good? you can't even answer me?" the taunting only makes you whine- the only sound you can manage to make.

each thrust is deep and slow; you feel every inch. he looks at the nonverbal, blabbering mess below him,

the smile widens on his face,

"my pretty little whore cock drunk?" leaning down, he kisses the side of your neck.

wrapping your arms around him, you close any gaps of space between you. the fourth orgasm crashes into you like a tidal wave. the incoherent moans and words fall from your mouth, your cunt contracting uncontrollably.

the pleasure numbs the rest of your body- your nails sinking into his back. the combination of your cunt contracting around him and the pain from your nails sends him hurdling into his own orgasm.

frank grunts and shoots ropes of cum into your cunt- pumping you full.

he holds himself there for a moment, allowing you to milk him dry. pulling out of you and collapsing next to you, frank kisses your shoulder,

"if you need me, you need to tell me- as much as i love seeing you worked up- i love seeing that cunt full even more."

#frank castle #frank castle smut #frank castle angst #frank castle fluff #frank castle x reader #frank castle x female reader #frank castle x you #frank castle x y/n #the defenders #the punisher #the punisher smut #the punisher x female reader #the punisher x reader #the punisher fluff #billy russo #billy russo smut #billy russo x reader #billy russo fluff #matt murdock #marvel #the avengers #jessica jones #iron fist #daredevil #jon bernthal #ben barnes #ben barnes smut #ben barnes x reader #loki #loki spoilers

[elaineonline]

𝗢𝗯𝘀𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗲 | 𝗧𝗼𝗷𝗶 𝗙𝘂𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗿𝗼

CHAPTER THREE

next on 𝗢𝗯𝘀𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗲 previously on 𝗢𝗯𝘀𝗰𝘂𝗿𝗲

warnings this chapter: strong language, short scene smut in the beginning, slight dacryphilia, rough sex, Toji is huge. angsty(?), drinking alcohol, reader is crazy (you guys know that tho)

summary : 3 years after murdering your ex husband, building a relationship with Toji Fushiguro is a struggle to keep what you've done in the past in the secret.

NOTE: gosh, i haven’t written smut in years :/ so i’m sorry for the short scene :(

reblogs are fine with me :D

tags (^^;) ; @brumous11

THE NEXT MORNING

As you begin to wake up, you gradually open your eyes. Then soon as you open your eyes, you are met with Toji's chest huge chest.

oh that’s right.

As all of your memories from yesterday began to flood back to you as you thought to yourself.

shit that’s embarrassing.

You were going to sit up when you realized you were still in Toji's tight hold, which made you blush as you looked down at his muscular arms.

You had no idea Toji had awoken before you. When he realized you wanted to get up, he carefully removed his arms from around your waist, his rough palms slowly rubbing against it.

He missed hugging someone at night, as strange as it felt to confess it. That someone happened to be his ex wife. So, he enjoyed sleeping next to you.

Not to mention the fact that seeing you asleep turned him on a little, even if he didn't want it to admit it, he had to.

He felt a little out of his head because it had been nearly three years since he had sex.

"I must have gone insane yesterday, I’m sorry." You say quietly, since you have only recently awoken, and face-palmed yourself after sitting up on the side of your stomach.

It was safe to say that you didn't remember a lot from yesterday, besides your parents stopping by. But you know how you can be when you're drunk.

"Nah not really, but aren't you hungover?" You swiftly shook your head 'no' as he turned to you and questioned.

You hadn't gotten hungover in awhile because you'd become so used to to drinking.

damn. Toji pondered.

To be that intoxicated and not get hangover, he realized you had to be a strong alcoholic.

Toji never imagined he'd be in the company of an alcoholic woman. But, he was so taken with you that it didn't matter to him.

He believed he could fix you, the same way his ex-wife fixed him.

“Well i’m off. are you? could we do something today?” You asked him, hoping not to come across as desperate. Even so, you enjoyed being around him, and it's fortunate that he felt the same way.

"Yeah, I'm off…" he trailed off because he suddenly was drawn in by your slightly exposed chest, which was made worse by your low-hanging black tank top.

You became aware of this, and mentally smirked.

has he had sex recently? you wondered.

“So.. What do you want to do today?” In a seductive tone, you asked on purpose.

"I wanna be honest," he adds, his deep voice making you pool in your panties.

like the first time you two met.

It doesn't feel like you've only known him for two days. for some reason, it feels like you've already known him for much longer.

As if you already knew what he was going to say, you hum.

"I want to fuck you," he states bluntly.

fuck it.

You weren’t worried anymore, and you didn’t care if you were moving fast. You knew Toji would stick around.

“Try not to wake my son up.”

Toji strokes his dick in his large right hand while in between your legs, looking down at you hungrily.

he’s been waiting for this since day one, which he felt he shouldn’t have. He just hoped his ex wife could forgive him for moving too fast. But honestly, he didn’t care if she was disappointed in him at the moment.

You nodded as you raised your gaze to his, legs spread wide, and lust in your eyes.

You really wanted him, but he was so big that you were a little afraid of him being inside you.

So how were you going to keep the poor boy from waking up?

But are you going to back out?

nope.

He moved closer to you, still hovering above you before settling in close to your cunt, slightly moving your panties to the side.

You trailed your index finger on his perfectly sculpted abs on his stomach, becoming impatient. He cuts you off by slowly inserting his tip within you, forcing him to hiss and you to lightheartedly gasp.

He was so thick and girthy that his inches began to go deeper and deeper inside of you. You were already struggling to keep your composure.

And you were squeezing him so nicely, he was also struggling to keep his composure.

Toji realized he had to do this quickly, since he knew Megumi would soon wake up.

He began by moving slowly inside of you, causing you to moan and gently throw your head back.

Toji holds the sides of his hips with his enormous hands and grips them tighter, his steady pace increasing.

You lower your head and bring your hand to hold his face, knowing that if you made eye contact with him, you'd be able to reach your peak sooner.

Toji went feral after you did that, his hips thrusting inside you at a rapid pace. You attempted biting your lower lip to keep from being too loud, yet you failed.

Toji seized one of his large hands and covered it with your mouth lightly shushing you as nothing but flesh slapping filled the room. Because the pleasure you were feeling was excruciating, you let out a suppressed whimper as tears developed in your eyes.

Toji grinned as he noticed this, adoring the tears in your eyes.

He's not like your ex-husband, so don't be concerned. With his cock shoved inside of you, this is the only way he can make you cry.

Because of the tremendous pleasure, you tried to move him back a little with your hand on his chest, but he only slapped it away.

That irritated him.

“You’re a big girl right? So take it.” he grunted separating his hand from your mouth.

Hearing your pretty moans would be the icing on the cake for him, as he was about to cum.

“i-i’m gonna-“ you dragged out before you cut yourself off with a moan, not breaking your eye contact from him.

Toji was already aware of what you were attempting to say.

He brings his hand down then strokes your clit in circles with his large thumb, which was the final straw for you. you flung your head back for the second time and went undone as your milky white cum spilled out, and onto the sheets.

“Fuck.” Toji groans removed his cock from inside of you and strokes it a few times before landing thick ropes of his seed on top of your stomach.

You both just stayed where you were for a minute, your orgasms fading as you both ran out of breath.

Toji reaches for a rag that was laying on top of his nightstand, cleans up your lower stomach area, and then throws the now cum filled rag on the floor.

He lays down alongside you and pulls you up into his chest, where you can rest your head securely.

"What happened to taking it slow?" He says and you gaze up at him before giggling, and he chuckles as well.

"I mean, it’s not like we're not getting married or anything." You shrug as you yawn.

He felt a little more calm when you said that, worried if he looked stupid after what was said between you guys two nights ago.

“That’s true, kid.” He felt the sudden urge to annoy you by calling you the word. ‘kid’.

“Kid?!” You abruptly sit on top of him, using his chest as support, he holds your lower back area with one of his hands to keep you from falling.

He hummed, a playful smirk plastered on his face, "mhm."

You look down at him, perplexed, as if he didn't realize you were just five years apart or something.

You were 26 and he was 31 at the time. That didn't seem like a huge age difference to you.

You pout, hoping you didn't come across like a child to him, which you hoped you didn't. given to what you guys just did minutes before.

He grinned as he tilted his head. He grabbed your hips and pushed you back onto the bed, saying, "Don't give me that face, I'm only messin' around."

You chuckle and give a quick "oh." knowing that your sense of humor may use some work.

"Megumi hasn't gotten up yet, let's get in the shower," he says as he rises from his bed and grabs your legs and pulling them towards him, before picking you up carrying you in bridal style.

The funny thing is Toji didn’t even go check and see if he were up.

And you had a strong suspicion that round two was going to be in there.

i need a drink. you thought.

You wander around Toji's house with a limp for the most of the day, which he enjoys seeing because he knows he did a pretty good job.

Half of the reason you were walking the way you were was because of the session you guys had in the shower. While carrying you, he fucked you.

Your lips were also a little swollen as a result of you guys making you with each other so aggressively.

You'd really enjoy a drink right now, as much as you enjoyed being with him. He allowed you to drink, but only one glass of wine, which was clearly insufficient for you.

you needed more.

It was now the afternoon, and you already vowed to spend the entire day with him.

So, in your desperation, you requested him to drive you to the store because you needed "important" household items. which he accepted.

Knowing that he doesn't like taking Megumi to stores since he likes to grab items and knock them down, as well as taking his socks off every few minutes, so you were relatively smart for thinking of this.

“He’s a pain at grocery stores.” Toji gives Megumi a sidelong glance before rolling his eyes.

It was True, Toji had to pay for Megumi's misbehavior on numerous occasions.

“Awe, i’m sure he’s not that bad.” You had a pouty lip as you stared at Megumi, who you were already hugging while holding.

“He’s staying in the car.” He says dryly and you giggle a little.

"As long as you stay in there with him," you say.

Before returning his gaze to his son, Toji gave you a 'Duh' expression.

As a result, he stayed in the car with him while you went “shopping” on your own.

shopping for alcohol that is.

The only thing that was annoying was having to walk around the with a limp.

When you saw the clear glass door full of beers, it was almost as though sparkles appeared in your eyes.

You gleefully make your way to the door handle, yanking it open with one hand while the other reaches for one of the beer bottle cases.

You place the case on the ground, grab one of the beers, and return your focus to the fridge's handle, which you use to open the cap.

Unfortunately, you were an expert at opening them, so this was no problem for you.

You dropped the bottle cap on the ground. "Fucking finally, ugh." You groaned as you slid the bottle into your mouth and nearly engulfing it all. Which was the most satisfying thing ever to you.

You were getting a lot of strange looks from individuals who were innocently just out shopping, but you didn't bat an eye.

After all, you were still paying for it after you finished anyway.

"Are you sure it's a smart idea to do what you're doing?"

You shift your eyes away from the front of you and snapped them to the left of where the voice was coming from.

Your mother, the last person you wanted to see.

"Fuck," you mutter angrily as you turn the other way.

Ignore her and she'll probably go away.

“I know you hear me alright?” she says, her hand on your shoulder, in a calm tone.

"You get your hands off of me," you say, turning back to her using the heals of your shoes. "What are you even doing here?" you ask, pointing at her. “Are you stalking me or something? I alr-”

You were cut off by her eyes shifting downward, and the persons hand she was holding almost gave you a heart attack.

You hoped the small girl staring back at you wasn't who you thought she was.

She isn’t Saeko, She isn’t Saeko, She isn’t Saeko, Just someone who looks like her. You began to manifest in your mind.

"I think this is a sign that you should speak with her." While staring directly at you, your mother says.

You're speechless as you continue to make eye contact with the girl, the girl you haven’t seen in years, the girl who’s grown so much in this 3 year time period, your daughter,

Saeko.

She looks so much like him.

And thinking about him was the last thing you wanted to do right now.

As she began to walk away, your mother let go of her hand.

You raise your voice, "W-Wait, don't leave me with her!" As you see your mother go away, you begin to panic.

"I'm simply going to keep shopping and then I'll come back." she proceeds to walk away before turning around and saying something more. "Besides, she is your daughter,"

You mentally scream since you weren't expecting this and didn't want your kid to witness you in this state.

A drunken mess.

"Are you going to just stand there?" Saeko asks, her voice irritated.

She has such a mature voice. As you returned your stare to her, you thought.

You must have been surprised that you didn't fall to your knees and start crying. Maybe it was because it happened so suddenly, super unexpectedly.

"Uhm, what exactly do you want know?" You inquire, bringing the bottle you were holding back to to your lips to soothe your anxiety.

"Why am I living with them?" she asks harshly, referring to your parents. You could tell she was upset, hell, you’d be upset too if your parents left you and you didn’t know the cause.

how am i going to explain everything to a six-year-old?

"Fucking hell," you say place one of your hands is placed on top of your head.

Saeko was growing irritated, she was on the verge of saying "forget it" and walking away. She didn't understand why she woke up one day to find neither of her parents in her life.

She didn't start asking questions until this year, since she had always assumed you'd return as promised 3 years ago.

You lower yourself to your level, now holding the beer in both hands. "I went to prison for a short period of time for something, and now it's an order that you live with your grandparents," you state outrightly, your hands now shaking.

On the other hand, Saeko's expression remained unchanged. Her expression reminded you of the one he'd make when he hated what was in front of him,

You.

which was extremely difficult for you.

Regardless, no matter what she knew, you never imagined she'd hate you.

"How about my father?" she asked.

You fought back tears and tried your utmost not to cry, you would do anything not to be in this position right now. Even though, you could’ve just got up and walked away while leaving her there.. You just couldn’t bring yourself to.

“He’s dead, Koko.”

She pauses for a second, she just didn’t understand any of this.

So she pauses for a second, “Don’t call me that.” She says this before smacking the bottle out of your hand, which has shattered on the ground.

There weren't many people around at the time. But there were enough of them to come to a halt and stare at the scene unfolding in front of them.

You stared at it for a moment before glancing up at her, dumbfounded.

"I'm sure you're the reason he died!" You gently look down at her hands as she raises her voice, you could’ve even say anything. Because it was true, you were the reason he’s now dead.

"I hate you." she starts by saying, which hit you hard in your chest. "And I'm now happy you're not here," she continues. You could tell she was going to cry because her voice cracked a little.

The last thing you wanted in life was for her to hate you, even though a small piece of you knew one day that she would, “Saeko, i-it wasn’t my attention-“

Your mother cut you off as she came out of an aisle and walked up to the two of you. "I'm guessing you told her," She says with a grin on her face.

That smirk on her face said it all, she had planned this.

You could tell she was teaching your daughter to hate your guts because she despised you herself, and it wasn’t a shock to you.

You got back up and walked up to your mother, intending to place your hands on her. But you knew you had to question her about it since it was all senseless.

"It's not a coincidence that you ran into me here," you begin, and your mother's grin remained on her face as your daughter glanced up at both of you.

"You followed me here," You began reading her like a book, and she simply let you because she wanted to inform you that she had won.

The whole coming to your house thing was a scam; they wanted you to come over and talk to Saeko for yourself to get a sense of how horrible a mother you were. But, because you were inebriated, she knew they'd have to track you down and wait for the proper moment to bring her to you.

After they “left.” they actually watched your every move, waiting for you to leave your house.

They were shocked you met someone when they saw the man you were with, referring to Toji of course. Especially with his handsome looks.

"I'm going to fuck you up." You felt nothing but wrath as you we’re about to take your jacket off.

You stopped yourself and you suddenly take a deep breath knowing that wouldn’t have been a smart idea to do in a store.

"However, because I'm better than that, I'm going to get a restraining order," you say.

"It doesn't matter to me hun," your mother shrugged, chuckling, "just as long as Saeko finally meets the piece of garbage we've been telling her about for the past three years."

Before you could say anything else, security approached you both before saying, "You guys are going to have to leave, we don’t tolerate fighting here." He says as he stood only a few inches away from both of you.

You were panicking out in your head as you walked out of the store, one of them being how you were going to tell Toji the reason why you had nothing in your hands, the other reason being what just happened in the store. You know you were going to be thinking about that for the rest of your life, especially your daughters voice.

Toji gave you a look as you climbed into the car, as if he knew what you were up to.

He smelled the liquor on you as soon as you sat in the car, and when he saw you go out of the store with nothing in your hands.

you slowly and softly made eye contact with him, knowing you'd been caught. "You were in there drinking," he points at you.

You say nothing, not even willing to deny it. You knew you’d just look more stupid then you already did. "Fuck you're crazy," he growls. As he ran his hand through his hair before letting it hang loose and fall in a jumble.

"I know," you mumble, looking down at your hands, your face flushed with embarrassment.

you wouldn’t have blamed him at all if he didn’t want to talk to you after this, you wouldn’t want to talk to yourself either if you were in his shoes.

But perhaps that's what Toji liked about you, he might’ve liked the fact that you're insane.

"And, uhm, well," you say, raising your eyes to him, "we should probably leave right now because I didn't pay for that drink."

And without a second's hesitation, turned his attention to the wheel and shifted into reverse, immediately backing out. Even if you would have paid for it if you had to, he already has some type of PTSD as a consequence of having to pay for Megumi every time he goes shopping.

Toji knew in the beginning but definitely knew after this, that you were going to be a challenge. And he was 100% up for it.

#jjk toji #jujutsu kaisen fanfic #jujutsu kaisen smut #jujutsu kaisen toji #toji fic #toji fluff #toji fushiguro #toji imagine #toji thirst #x reader #jujutsu kaisen #toji smut #toji x you #jjk smut

[yumihoe]

Title - Mother Knows best.

Fandom- My Hero academia

Paring: Mother! Momo Yaoyorozu x Daughter! Reader

Genre - Smut

Wordcount-1,288

Summary: Let Momo Provide for you after all she's been doing It your whole life.

Content Warnings - Incest, Noncon, Drugging, Predatory Behavior, use of the word "Cunny". MDNI

Momo yaoyorozu is by no means a bad mother.

She has provided for you, given you everything you have ever wanted for in life; a clean nice home. The best possible foundation for your future. In fact, She's made it her own personal mission to be the driving force in all of your success.

When you were six it had been softball, You came to her begging To play, Telling her that you wanted to go pro one day. She made sure to get you a top-of-the-line personal trainer and Only the best grade Equipment.

When you turned eight- your dreams of softball long forgotten- you had come to her stating that you wanted to be a great hero like your mother. Her heart had swelled with pride and she took it upon herself to make sure you were on the right path. A tutor for Fighting Techniques, Pre-mech designing for a possible hero suit to accommodate your blooming quirk, even going as far as to let you accompany her during her hero services. You had watched her in aw, little mouth agape and eyes akin to saucers as Momo took down Low-grade villains executing a robbery.

When the villains had been subdued you had run-up to her and threw your small arms around her waist, burying your chubby face in her stomach " You're the best Mommy"! you had squealed.

Momo Wonders If you still think she's the best now.

The small, still logical voice told her that she was disgusting. Taking advantage of you like this,

But what had she done besides what you needed her to do?

You had come to her, as you had many times before in your life asking for her guidance...Her help.

Help with alieving Sexual frustration.

Of course, she was taken back at first, this particular request had made her drop her soba onto the kitchen floor and her eyes widen.

But she recovered quickly. You were a grown woman. And she understood that your almost adorable lack of sexual knowledge was partially her fault, as she had always made sure to keep you on a straight path your entire life, a path that had no detours for lovers or sex or dating.

She had agreed to help you, why wouldn't she. There was nothing strange about a Mother teaching her daughter how to get take care of sexual urges. It was simply a part of life she had forgotten to guide you through and was revisiting to ensure your success in.

And that's what she reminded herself as you squirmed under her.

You had been so needy.

Such a beautiful, quaking mess.

The constant hum of the vibrator she had pressed against your clit was the only sound in your bedroom besides the sweet sounds you would occasionally let out as she built you up to your first orgasm. You had came so beautifully for her and it was an image that had stayed so vividly in her mind well after she left your room.

In the following days after educating you, Momo finds herself struggling to suppress whatever feeling that had bubbled up to the surface.

Her senses had seemed to heighten, her perception of you changing. When had you become so ...Womanly.

Your mother found herself noticing things about you she had been oblivious to before. The swell of your breast in t-shirts. The way your ass looked as you bent over to pick something up. How your yawning face was so, so very similar to the delicious Oh face you make when you climax.

You were a drug. One Momo found herself being deprived of.

she tries to cherish soft moments with you, from before she started seeing you in such a disgusting light. Yet still, even when you have the purest intentions momos mind can only seem to distort the image into something forbidden.

when you offer to take her on a girl's day to the beach to celebrate Mother's days, Momo can only find herself wishing that the waves would crash against you so hard your bikini top flies off and she might be able to catch a glimpse of your perfect tits.

When you inform her that you've finally found a decent apartment and would be moving out soon she's devastated. Not because you won't be there to keep her company but because she won't be able to sneak into your room and pocket your dirty panties if you anymore.

You had smiled at her, so proud that you were finally going to really start your life, go out on your own. But Momo was determined to make sure you stayed.

"You'll be glad to get me out of the house " You laughed taping up yet another box.

Momo feels anything but.

She knows she should be helping you pack, helping with the moving process. Supporting you through this part of your life as a good mother should. yet she can only find herself finding ways to keep you with her longer.

She makes up excuse after excuse as to why she needs you to stay in the house with her, but your mind is made up. You seem to sum up her franticness to get you to stay to empty nesters syndrome.

" I'll make sure I visit, " You reassure her.

But Momo doesn't care about you visiting as much as you can, she wants you to stay with her.

Momo Realizes that you'll leave her and rarely visit. Unless she does something.

For a moment she had thought of Blacklisting you from the apartment complex you were set to move into. But she decides against it. It would be a temporary fix at most, you'd eventually find another place sooner or later and she'd end up back to square one. Momo finds her solution in her status.

Being a hero afforded her access to any substance for an array of problems. When she was early in her hero days her free access to pills had come in handy for cheap highs and party activities, and as she got older it had allowed her the ability to receive top grade painkillers to aid in the damage hero work had done to her bodies over the years.

Now, she would use it as means to make sure you stay exactly where she needed you to be.

It hadn't been hard to get her hands on gamma-hydroxybutyric acid. The date rape drug.

Momo made sure to be as unassuming as possible. Instead of making excuses to prolong your stay, she pretended to welcome the change. Went furniture and decoration shopping, even proposed she cook you your favorite meal for your last night in the house.

For a second, Momo almost has a moment of clarity as she watches you bring your lips to the glass of wine she made with your food. clarity that tells her she's a sick fuck, that this is wrong -that she's a bad mother.

Yet with the way, you were so manageable in your intoxicated state, so easy to stuff into the backseat of her car, to drive out to her house in the hills.

You stay that way even as Momo begins tying you down to the guest bed, spread eagle. Only beginning to flutter awake as she fastens the last tie around your ankle.

Your struggling now, tears streaming down your pretty face as you beg around the gag she put into your mouth.

Momo yaoyorozu is by no means a bad mother.

All she has ever done is make sure that you have had the best possible chances for success in life.

And even now as she climbs between your legs, giving your sweet cunny a small kitten lick, she's certain that she will be able to take care of you.

Whether you want her to or not.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Some of you guys have raging mommy kinks.

It's me. I'm some of you guys.

Anyways if you liked it feel free to reblog I don't mind!

#momo x reader #mha x reader #yandere momo yaoyorozu #yumihoewrites #tw: noncon #momoyaoyorozuxfemreader #yandere x female reader #tw: mommy kink #mha noncon #bnha noncon #yandere mha #yandere bnha

[finduilasclln]

Welcome to my Buddie Fic Rec List!

Since I read so many Buddie fics, and some of them are so good, I thought I’d share them in some handy lists. I’ll be posting them in different categories, and you will be able to find all the posts HERE.

Disclaimer: Always read the tags and warnings! Also, tastes differ. These are my personal favorites, which doesn’t mean they’ll automatically be yours of course.

If you want to reblog and add some of your own favorites that fit the category, please be my guest! I always love discovering new fics. I will also add new recs of my own whenever I stumble upon them.

One last thing: Please like and comment when you’ve had a nice read. It means so much to authors to hear your thoughts! And don’t hesitate to share this post and spread the love for these fics around!

Buddie Fic Rec: "Hurt/Comfort - Trauma - PTSD".

Kind of a broad spectrum, I know. But we all love a good whump, right?

I, Hildy, by red_to_black || 10939 words ||

It's not often that Buck is the sensible one in their little fire family - but seriously, someone has to let Eddie know that Hildy isn't taking over the world.

That is, if Eddie would stop panicking about sentient technology long enough to listen to him.

(or - the many ways in which Hildy interfered with Eddie and Buck's life, until they got the picture.)

i've only known you to keep your word, by thisissirius (@thisissirius) || 4446 words ||

The prospect of going home alone, tending to his hurts and sleeping in that bed all alone—Buck’s breath hitches and he closes his eyes, forehead pressed to the lockers.

buck's lonely and eddie knows.

into the gravity, by renecdote (@renecdote) || 6025 words ||

“When you fell,” Buck says, and his voice is raw, like all the words have been stuck in his throat, screaming, clamouring to get out. “I swear I felt it. This sharp, stabbing pain in my chest. It was like—like I couldn’t breathe, couldn’t think, couldn’t—”

He cuts himself off; doesn’t—maybe can’t—finish the thought. But Eddie doesn’t need him to.

“Yeah,” he says. “I know what’s like.”

In which Buck takes care of Eddie.

Love Language, by red_to_black || 6495 words ||

The one in which there's too much pollen around, Eddie pines, and Buck is oblivious.

Or - Eddie's love language is acts of service, and Buck doesn't totally get it.

the things that torment most, by renecdote (@renecdote) || 5150 words ||

Eddie makes himself comfortable at the other end of the couch, lifting Buck’s legs and putting them back down in his lap. His hand rests on Buck’s uninjured ankle, not caressing but sort of holding, touch achingly gentle.

“You should try audiobooks,” he says. “Or maybe podcasts. Chris has been downloading them on my phone, some of them are pretty interesting.”

“Sure,” Buck agrees sleepily. His leg doesn’t hurt so much anymore and he kind of wants to go for a run, hit his training goal for the day, but he’s warm and comfortable and it’s nice to just be here with Eddie. To just exist, without having to worry about what comes next.

In which Buck reads a lot and all roads lead to him figuring out he's in love with his best friend.

Not done, by red_to_black || 4579 words ||

Buck volunteered to get into the ambulance with him, knowing the risks. He's pinching the guy's skin and saying, "Take it out," and Eddie, for the first time since leaving the military, feels it - a connection. A kindred spirit. A purpose that tethers him to reality. A person relying on him to get the job done.

(or - a list of things Eddie Diaz couldn't give up on, including himself.)

lest he be consumed, by thisissirius (@thisissirius) || 5921 words ||

“Eddie,” Buck says, crouching down, hand to Eddie’s cheek. “There’s nothing you can do here, now, that will make me leave, you understand?”

set post-eddie begins.

a leaf falls on loneliness, by iimpossible_things (@iimpossible-things) || 11163 words ||

Buck doesn’t think that if he were to say, “I’m in a bad place”, that anyone would turn him away. Really, he doesn’t. The 118 has too many good, kind people for that.

But every time he wants to open his mouth, to say something, to reach out to Eddie or Bobby or Hen or Chim, he hears Eddie yelling, “you’re exhausting.”

—you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting, you’re exhausting—

So each day he does his job and he laughs and he jokes and he pretends he’s the care-free goofball he’s always been. And each day he packs away his bruises and his worries, takes them home to his empty loft with its quiet rooms, and licks his wounds in silence.

for all the perfect things i doubt, by extasiswings (@extasiswings) || 5199 words ||

Evan Buckley is really good in bed.

Sometimes he wishes he wasn’t.

standing on the edge (of great), by evcndiaz (@evcndiaz) || 5050 words ||

Ana cuts him off. “What were you thinking about?”

“I—What?”

“What were you thinking about? You know, when you moaned your best friend’s name right before you came inside me. What was even going through your head? I know it certainly couldn’t have been me.”"

or; eddie says buck's name during sex with ana. it goes about as well as you would expect. and then somehow, it gets a little better

a million little things, by thisissirius (@thisissirius) || 2835 words ||

“What happened after the woman, Eddie? Keep talking.”

“House came down,” Eddie says.

“That’s right.” Whatever happiness Eddie feels at getting it right fades beneath Buck’s strained voice. “Think it’s another earthquake.”

Eddie doesn’t like the idea of that. He thinks of water and doesn’t know why. Thinks of hanging out of a building, Buck screaming his name. “S’bad."

There’s the sound of scraping. “It is, but I’m coming, Eddie, you understand?”

some days I am too proud to ask for you, by wafflesofdoom (@capseycartwright) || 7071 words ||

eddie had heard some grim noises, in his life, but the scream he heard his best friend let out as they rescued him from the factory fire the was up there with one of the worst things eddie had ever heard. it was raw - and broken. and maybe it was the implications of that scream, that scared eddie more than the sound itself, but either way, there was something wrong with his best friend.

- or, a post 4x05 coda that explores eddie's concern for buck's mental wellbeing after the factory fire.

signs from the universe, and all that, by youbetsya (@maddiebuckettebuckley) || 8931 words ||

“Look, it’s like the universe wanted us to take it!”

Eddie rolls his eyes as he follows Buck into the elevator. Sure, he had suggested taking the stairs, but he doesn’t really care one way or another. And he’s certain the universe cares even less. “You really believe that crap? Signs from the universe and all that?”

“Sure.” Buck hits the button for the bottom floor of the parking garage, where they had parked, and the quiet whirring of the elevator starts up. “I think I have to believe everything happens for a reason. Predestined path or whatever. ”

Eddie scoffs. “You sound like a Catholic.”

OR The universe puts Eddie and Buck on time out until they get their act together.

In the Aftershock, by hideeho (@agentlemuse) || 8843 words ||

When Eddie is injured on the job, Buck is forced to face the fallout.

Who's Gonna Drive You Home?, by allisonRW96 (@homerforsure) || 9304 words ||

Eddie looks back at the house. Fucking arson. His team gets to risk their lives because some asshole likes to play with matches

OR

Eddie Diaz has a bad day that just keeps getting worse.

renegade (if I would've known), by writerforlife (@such-geekiness) || 9571 words ||

"Eddie has always felt safe, with Buck at his back. Yet that isn’t enough anymore, not when Christopher is waking up screaming. Not when Eddie hasn’t been okay for a long time. Buck is not enough to save him, and Eddie doesn’t know how to say that, especially when Buck looks up, meets his eye, and says, “Don’t go.”"

Or: in the aftermath of leaving the 118, Eddie confronts his trauma, drinks beer with Buck, and goes to therapy - not exactly in that order, though

know i want forever, by withoutthetiger (@rewritetheending) || 932 words ||

"There was no way he could’ve noticed it any sooner – he’s not even convinced Buck was aware the moment it happened, not with the adrenaline that fuels so many of their rescues – but Eddie feels guilty about it all the same. The scene was an awful one, chaotic and nearly hopeless from the time they arrived until now, when Buck’s legs give out before he and Eddie are anywhere near the trucks, leaving him slumped in the mud for Eddie to find when he turns at the sound of Buck’s whimper.

It’s still pouring rain and nearing midnight, the moonlight barely enough to highlight the darkness of the blood on Buck’s palm when he pulls his hand away from his side, and Eddie's heart catches in his throat as he yells ahead to the team for help before falling to his knees and reaching for Buck’s uniform."

-

Set shortly before Season 5, written for the prompt “Just…hold my hand.”

white lights in your arms tonight, by soyxunxperdedor || 2594 words ||

Buck crowds in next to him, wrapping his shirt around the debris and then pressing down to staunch the flow of blood Eddie now realizes is oozing out around it. He squints at the debris, trying to identify it.

“Guess Chim’s not going to be the only rebar boy anymore,” he jokes when he realizes that’s what it is.

keep going, keep going come what may, by iriswests (@evanbucxley) || 10715 words ||

Buck doesn’t remember the details. It’s all foggy, mostly – how he got here. He barely remembers the events leading up to this: almost like he’d gone to sleep one night and woken here, a cruel reality, a prison of his own making. He thinks it could be hell: Eddie had warned him of hell, once, but then there are times where he’ll feel a brief sting in his arm, or the wind run through his hair, and it feels less like he’s a wayward soul and more like an asshole who got the short end of the stick, all things considered.

--

or; buck is the last man on earth. he’s dealing with it.

I hope I never lose you, I hope it never ends, by writerforlife (@such-geekiness) || 7449 words ||

"Eddie should be in the waiting room.

Everyone else is. His phone keeps buzzing in his pocket—a problem that could be solved by turning off vibration, but he doesn’t. He can’t. He lets every notification remind him that sitting in his truck in darkness, in silence, in the middle of the night, in the hospital parking lot, is not where he needs to be."

Or: Buck gets injured. Eddie thinks it's his fault.

blue skies, by spaceprincessem (@spaceprincessem) || 36729 words ||

“Most babies are born as accidents,” She says suddenly, like she’s decided that Buck has passed, that she can trust him with this.

Buck doesn’t really have an answer because that question hits way to fucking close to home. A year or so ago he would have said, yes, I was an accident, so I know how that goes, but Buck knows better now. Knows that he would almost give anything for that answer to still be yes. Evie’s finger works under the seal to rip it open, a stack of important looking papers dumping out onto the table in front of her.

“Not me,” she says without looking up as she organizes them into a neat stack, “I was engineered.”

And.

And Buck’s pretty fucking sure a giant, cataclysmic hole has ripped right open, dragging him down to the earth’s core where he vaporizes into dust.

{or Buck meets another savior baby and everything comes crashing down}

listen to you breathing (is where I wanna be), by Yavilee (@theladyyavilee) || 41038 words ||

“Hey, Eddie, how about you go look where Buck—”

For a moment Eddie is sure he’s just imagining it, the same way he always does, even after moving from a mild earthquake zone to the not so mild earthquake zone that is LA. Still every time the first second or so he is always sure he just imagined the shifting of the ground.

He has just enough time to realize that no, it’s definitely an earthquake, because Bobby stopped talking as well and they are looking at each other wide eyed.

And then the quake really hits.

* Or the one where Buck is presumed dead after a building collapse and Eddie has to live through the reminder that tomorrow isn't promised to anyone

if you love me, wake me, by allyasavedtheday (@littlespoonevan) || 3847 words ||

“Thank you for talking to him,” Eddie says then, rousing Buck from his reverie. His gaze is heavy and so sincere Buck almost wants to look away. “It- you don’t know how much it means to know he can go to you. That- that you’re there if I’m not.”

It feels like Eddie is saying something else, something Buck can’t fully grasp when the seeds of abandonment are still clinging to the edge of his mind, but he appreciates it all the same.

“Hey man, of course,” he says, too casual for the love he feels for Christopher and Eddie. “I’d do anything for him, you know that.”

Eddie hums in agreement, head ducked in a way that should hide his smile but Buck sees it anyway. “I know you would.”

It sits between them for a moment, the truth of the statement, and Buck finds himself bounding up off the couch when it becomes too much.

*

Buck and Eddie having conversations on couches.

***

I will be adding my own fics that fit the category, in case you want to read those too:

you are my answer (without question), by Finduilas || 1065 words ||

Buck has a really bad day. Eddie is there for him.

Bruises, by Finduilas || 1411 words ||

Day 1: “You’ve never looked more beautiful.” + hurt/comfort

#Buddie #Buddie Fic Rec #Buddie Fic Rec List #Fin's Fic Rec List

[eddiiediaz]

Hello :)

For the five sentences things you've reblogged, I propose to you for Buddie

"Hey Buck, care to explain to me why you're naked on my couch?"

So this got away from me. Oops 😂

It's late, really late, and they should go to bed but Christopher is at a sleepover and they've both just got home from a night out at the bar with The 118andCo so before he calls it a night and lets Buck sleep on the couch like he's done countless of times before, he leaves a drunken Buck in his living room to give them both some water. 

When he leaves the kitchen he nearly drops the bottles of water at the sight it front of him. 

Buck is sitting on his couch, head leaned back as he stares hazily at the ceiling, and the kicker? He's stark naked. Like completely naked from head to toe. And to top it off his legs are spread wide open for Eddie to see clearly even at this angle.

Eddie quickly looks up at the ceiling, trying to calm down and remind himself that he's seen Buck naked countless of times at the firehouse before. But it's just never been at his home, in his living room. Never been so…intimate.

"Hey Buck, care to explain to me why you're naked on my couch?" 

Buck chuckles and Eddie has to look down to see his expression and yep the man is drunk, drunk. 

"It was hot and uncomfortable so I just had to take my clothes off so I wouldn't be hot anymore." He giggles. "You're hot too, Eds. But don't worry you're comfortable." 

He winks. He fucking winks. 

Eddie knows he shouldn't think anything of it since his best friend seems to be plastered – seriously how many drinks did he have? – but he's a bit tipsy himself so he blames it on that when he asks, "You think I'm hot?"

"Oh yeah, the hottest. Like it's unfair how hot you are. It should be illegal."

Eddie snorts. "You're drunk."

"Doesn't mean it isn't true." He sing-songs bouncing his legs back and forth and Eddie has to look away again. 

"Am I that repulsive?" Buck asks in a low and sad voice. 

Eddie immediately catches his gaze and he looks hurt. "No, why would you think that?"

"Because you can't even look at me." He pouts. 

"Yeah, because you're naked."

"Because, I'm repulsive."

Eddie doesn't care anymore and crosses the distance between them so he can sit next to his best friend. "Buck, look at me." 

He does as he's told. 

"You are not repulsive. Where is this coming from?" 

"Because you won't look at me." Buck repeats, looking like a kicked puppy.

"Yeah, because I'm trying to be respectful. You've apparently had more drinks than I have."

This seems funny to the other man. "That's your fault." He pokes Eddie's stomach. 

"How's it my fault?" 

"Because you're so hot and sexy in that tight jeans and Henley combo and I was," he giggles again, "thirsty." 

He's just drunk, Eddie has to remind himself, he doesn't mean this. 

"Buck, I always wear that."

"Which is why I'm always so thiiirrstyyy. But tonight was extra hard." He giggles once more. "Hehe, hard."

From his periphery he can see something being very hard indeed. 

Eddie gulps.

"Hey, Eds?" Buck asks, breaking him from that certain freak out, his voice is low again and he look so timid and scared and all Eddie wants to do is wrap him up in a hug and guard him from all his fears. 

"Yeah?" 

"Do you think I'm hot?"

Eddie snorts. "What?"

"Do you think I'm hot? It's a simple question, Edmundo." 

It's Eddie's turn to poke Buck's stomach at the usage of his full name. 

He knows he shouldn't, but he's tipsy so he indulges. Besides, this is just like common knowledge. 

"Yes, Buck, I think you're hot. You're like a Greek God."

"I am?" Buck asks in awe like this wasn't a universal truth. 

"You are. Everyone knows you're hot Buck."

"Yeah, but you think I'm hot." Buck tells him, eyes pouring into him. "It's different."

"Why is it different?" 

"Because it's you, Eds." 

Eddie stares at him for a moment before clearing his throat. "We should get you some clothes." 

Buck petulantly shakes his head and folds his arms. "I don't wanna."

Eddie laughs. "And why not?" 

"They're itchy and too tight." 

They definitely were tight alright, the buttons on Buck's shirt looking all night like they were going to pop out and hurt someone's eye at any second. 

"How about I give you a pair of my gym shorts and that hoodie you left here?" 

The thing is, Buck's left at least three hoodies here that he tends to wear when he's staying over but never actually takes back home with him. 

Buck comically seems to mull this over, his pecs flexing and unflexing as he does and Eddie tries not to get lost in how good his tattoos look or the way his muscles tenses and intenses as he contemplates this or at–

And yep. Still hard. 

After what feels like forever, Buck finally nods in agreement. And that's all Eddie needs before he practically throws a water bottle at Buck to drink and rushes off the couch, dashing towards his room to get the clothes. 

Once the door closes he leans against it and takes several deep breaths. He can do this. He can be strong. He can handle a naked Buck calling him hot and being all adorable and –

The point is he can do this and this means nothing. Buck is just drunk. That's all.

With that determination in mind, he quickly grabs the clothes and heads back to the living room. 

Buck is already half asleep, so Eddie helps him put on his clothes. 

"Hey, Eds?" Buck asks once his eyes are closed as he nuzzles his nose against his pillow. 

"Yeah?" Eddie answers, hovering above him, not ready to leave just yet. 

"I love you."

And, oh. 

Oh.

"I love you too." He whispers into the night.

send me a sentence and I'll write more sentences

#buddie #buddie fic #b99tgplhtgawmf1sh #eddie diaz #evan buckley #my writing #kj's writing #my fics #kj's fics

[captainsy-cookiemonster]

Flower Crown

Summary: Mikey planned a date out in the forest.

Pairing: Mikey x 2nd person POV reader (again, it's basically guitarist!Mikey, but no guitar involved this time)

Warnings: flooofy fluff, fluff, and more fluff, annoying Mikey, tired reader, stubbornness on both sides, cheesy stuff, flower crowns, Mikey calling you a beautiful fairy because you are, lots of cuteness, i think that's all

A/N: inspired by my flower crown fail yesterday which led to this ask. This is neither beta'd nor proofread, there will be mistakes, ignore them.

Word count: no fucking clue. I keep writing stuff in my notes. Sry🙈

Title: Flower Crown

If you liked it, please reblog and comment💗 writers live off validation 💗 thank youuu 💗

°*°*°*°

Your day had started so wonderfully, so lazy. And you had planned to keep it that way, cuddling in bed with Mikey until your need for coffee grew unbearable and you had to get up. But then, you had had in mind, you'd migrate over to the couch and watch silly movies all day long. After all, last semester had been exhausting and you needed a break doing nothing, and it was your week off from work, so finally you could.

But Mikey had different plans.

You wake up with your head on his chest and his hand in your hair, for a change – usually it's the other way around. Once he sees your lashes fluttering open, he tries to get up and pull you out of bed with him.

"What? Why?" you whine, and cling onto him, trying hard to make him stay in bed.

"Because I have planned something for today, sweetcheeks."

Mikey? Having planned something? That doesn't involve you in bed? Since when?!

When you don't budge he sighs, "Okay, five minutes, I'll go make breakfast."

Grumbling, you agree and turn around, snuggling into the soft blanket. You must have dozed off, because next thing you know, Mikey is poking at your ribs from outside the blanket, making you squeak.

"C'mon, time's up, breakfast's done," he singsongs into your ear.

"Don't wanna," you huff and pull the blanket over your head.

"Fine."

You think Mikey would leave the room and let you sleep a little more, but oh you were wrong.

Suddenly, you feel his hands grab your ankles and pull on them. Shrieking and thrashing, nothing helps. Mikey –all while laughing his ass off – pulls until your butt reaches the edge of the bed and you're threatening to fall. Then he lets go.

"You comin'?"

You huff again, but get up and trudge behind him as he leads the way to the kitchen, grumbling the whole way.

The coffee barely fixed that. The t-shirt Mike tosses you when you get dressed, one of his, maybe fixes your mood more.

Mikey still doesn't tell you what he had planned, and when you ask him once you're sitting in his car, he only says it's a surprise, squeezing your thigh – a silent command to be patient.

Only that by the time he took the turn to go out of the city, it's not much of a surprise anymore. By then you know where you're going.

Mikey parks the car and while you roll your eyes because goddammit, you wanted to be lazy all day and not go for a hike, he hurries around the car to open your door for you. The puppy even takes your hand to help you out, but that's probably to make sure you're actually getting out of the car. But inwardly you swoon at the gesture. Whatever he had planned, he was convinced you'd like it.

Hand in hand you walk through the forest, breathing in the fresh air, enjoying the sounds of nature instead of the constant traffic. You have to admit, it's more relaxing than a day in front of the TV would have been.

"Ooh, Mikey, look!" you squeal when a little squirrel crosses the path in front of you. When you turn your head to beam at him, he's got that knowing smile on his face. You roll your eyes and look straight ahead, but heat spreads in your cheeks when you feel him press his lips to the side of your head.

You've been walking for a while when Mike tugs at your hand, leading you off the path. You open your mouth to complain, but at that moment, he turns his head towards you.

"Trust me, sweetcheeks. I know where we're going."

"O-okay."

He leads you through a few rows of trees until you find yourselves on a small clearing, a sea of flowers.

"C'mon," Mikey coos, tugging you forward when you're not moving.

"This... It's beautiful!" you press out, not really believing what you're seeing, surprised Mikey would take you to a place like this.

"I know baby, now come on." Mike tugs at your hand again, laughing.

He finds a nice spot under a tree for you to sit and shrugs off his backpack. Setting it down next to him. He pulls you into his side as you watch the flowers and grass sway in the light breeze.

You talk about anything and everything, and at one point, Mike pulls something from his backpack.

"Oh my god, when did you make these?" you ask him, once again surprised, unwrapping the sandwich.

"While you were sleeping." He shrugs and takes a bite.

"But... How long did you let me sleep?"

"An hour, maybe a bit less."

"Oh."

You lean your head on his shoulder while you both munch away. Once you're done, he collects the trash and stuffs it back into his bag.

And as you stare out into the field of flowers, you have an idea.

"I wanna make flower crowns!"

You jump up and stand in front of Mike, holding out your hands.

"Huh?"

"Help me pick?" you give him your best puppy dog eyes.

"So, how many do you need?"

"Many! For both of us, I need a lot!"

By the time you return to your seat under the tree, both of you had collected a nice bouquet of daisies. Mikey hands you the flowers he collected and takes off his hoodie, placing it on the grass, and you put the flowers down. Sitting down, cross-legged, you start braiding, Mikey watching intently, handing you some flowers every time you go to grab some. The first crown is quickly finished.

"Can you hold it?" you ask your boyfriend, handing him the delicate work.

"Sure, whatcha - oh."

Quickly, you take a few bades of grass and braid them, and then again for the other crown you'd be making.

"Now hold it like this" - you manoeuvre Mikey's hands and the crown so you could tie it - "and I'll secure this."

You beam up at him when Mike is holding the finished project. He goes to put it on your head, but you stop him, catching him by his forearms and gently taking the flower crown from him.

"Nuh-uh, this one is for you," you declare grinning and place the crown on his fluffy mob of curls. He does look a little confused when you sit back on your heels and take in your masterpiece.

"Aww, you look so cute, puppy!" you squeal and kiss the tip of his nose.

You're lucky you're concentrating hard on finishing up the second flower crown now, because the way Mikey is looking at you, all heart eyes and pouty lips, would have been a major distraction. A soft smile plays on his lips as you stick out the tip of your tongue when you run out of long enough stems to braid and have to be quick to fix it. And he feels himself breathe a sigh of relief when you manage to save your hard work. As if hypnotized, he watches you work, and when you hand him the finished product so you could tie it, he holds it delicately, before placing it on your head.

"Sweetcheeks, are you a fairy?" His eyes are wide as he stares at you in wonder, before you both fall into a fit of giggles.

"Dunno, are you? You look like a little pixie!" you wheeze out, wiping away some tears. As an answer, he just starts laughing more. A silly thought shoots through your head and you jump up and grab Mikey's hand. You run to the middle of the field, tugging him along with you. You let go, take a few more steps away from him, spread your arms and spin with your eyes closed, basking in the sun.

Again, Mikey watches you with a loving grin before he grabs you by the waist and pulls you to him. He takes your hand and starts to sway the both of you.

You have no idea how long you two danced amidst the flowers. You only know that it was the best day you've had in a while. When it's time to go back home, Mike holds your hand while you walk back to the car. You two watch the sunset from the diner window. The waitress laughed at you when you came in all giggly wearing your flower crowns, mumbling something about young love.

When you go to sleep, the flower crowns rest on Mikey's desk. You'd dry them. As a reminder of a perfect day.

#mike (hellraiser) #mike (hellraiser) drabble #mike (hellraiser) x reader #mike (hellraiser) x you #Mike (hellraiser) fanfic #Mike (hellraiser) fluff #Mike (hellraiser) fanfiction #Mike (hellraiser) headcanon #Mike (hellraiser) smut #henry cavill #henry cavill fanfic

[theduosetter]

━ 𝐖𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐓𝐰𝐨 𝐎𝐥𝐝 𝐇𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐬 𝐌𝐞𝐞𝐭 ║𝐊𝐮𝐫𝐨𝐨 𝐓𝐞𝐭𝐬𝐮𝐫𝐨

☆ Pairing: Au!Kuroo Tetsuro x f!reader

☆ Summary: Two broken hearts never truly heal no matter how many years pass. Maybe because the only person who can heal it is the one who caused the tear.

☆ Warning(s): angst, fluff,

☆ A|N: any feedback is appreciated! If you can please give it a heart or reblog it would really help my writing. Thank you!

Kuroo sighed for what seemed the millionth time today. His mind kept wandering off somewhere else, today felt different. There was something within him saying that today wasn't going to be the same again.

His phone vibrated once more alerting him of another incoming message. The screen lit up with the name Nanami. His lips moved as he saw the words spread out on the white background. Closing his eyes he leaned back against his office chair.

"What's with your face?" a voice spoke.

Kuroo rolled his eyes, "Nothing is wrong with my face, Kenma."

"Liar." he placed the folder down on his desk, "Is it Nanami?"

"No..." he half smiled "She's great actually... things are good between us right now."

"For someone who says that it sure doesn't look like it." Kenma said "Could have fooled me."

He sat up and looked at his friend, "Is there something that still needs to be done?"

Kenma shook his head "No everything important got taken care of."

Standing up he grabbed his blazer and put it on. "If anyone else calls can you take care of it?"

"Ok." before Kuroo could make it out the door, Kenma then asked him "Are you going to be alright?"

"I'll be alright. See you tomorrow..." he slightly smiled then took off.

Your feet grew tired as you kept walking the busy streets. The sun was just about to set down on the ocean. Even though it was warm, the air was nothing but fresh, the perk of living near coast.

A small smile formed on your lips as you saw kids running around the nearby playground, playing with their friends. It was the purest sound in the world; you thought.

There was never a doubt in your mind that being a mom was a gift. You hoped one day you too would have the chance at raising a mini you or a little boy that looked like your partner.

Your phone then rang. You quickly took it out of your bag and accepted the call.

"Hey love." you said "I'm on my way back home."

"I can't wait to see you." he said, making your chest tighten "I might be preparing something delicious for tonight."

"Really?" you asked "What's the occasion?"

He smiled, leaning back against the sink. "What, I can't just do something special for the love of my life?"

Your smile faltered as you remembered those words. Those were the ones that hurt you the most, even after almost 10 years.

"Of course you can." you replied "Can I have a hint on what it may be?"

"You would figure it out right away like last time. I'm not making that mistake again." he chuckled.

"It was one time, h/n." you smiled small, "Do you need me to bring something home from the store? I'm close to it."

"Pick out any drink you want to have and dessert if you'd like."

"Okay now I'm really curious about what you have up your sleeve, boy." you chuckled.

He bit his lip, smiling as he heard your laughter. "Don't take too long, alright?"

"I'll do my best love since it is rush hour. Wait for me?"

"Like you have to ask." he leaned over checking the food "I can't wait to see you. Text me when you get to the station."

"I will, love." you bid him goodbye and hung up.

It's sad how he has tried his best to make you happy and yet there's never a moment where something doesn't remind you of him. All these years you still wonder about how he's doing with his new partner. If he could accomplish the goals he had set out for himself. Even the thought if he maybe... still thought about you like you did.

Sighing, you shook your head "Stop it... you can't keep doing this to him. You're with h/n now not with him, he chose you agreed. No more second guessing." You mumbled.

You were about to turn left at the end of the playground when a stranger collided into you. Your feet slipped from underneath you. The bar that was put up around the playground was too far away for you to hold on to. Folding your elbows back, you opened your hands wide so you could stop your head from hitting the pavement.

Lucky enough, the tall stranger reacted in time and pulled you into him to avoid you injuring yourself. "I'm so sorry, are you alright?"

"Y-yeah... I'm fine..." you replied "That was close- wow I almost fell-" you tilted your head up and your breathing stopped.

The stranger kept their arm around your back, holding you against his chest. His eyes roamed the details on your face, from your eyes to shape of your lips. His heart was pounding against his chest, not believing you were in front of him.

"K-Kuroo..." you muttered.

"Y/n... I never thought I'd see you here." his brain couldn't wrap around the idea that you were here.

Realizing your chest was too close to his, you gently stepped back. Your cheeks flushed "I- um... I-I work around here."

"Right..." he mumbled "I thought you had stayed in Tokyo, is all."

"I got a job offer awhile back." You said "I've been living here ever since. What about you?..."

He rubbed the back of his neck, feeling shy suddenly. "I'm working with a company on a project along with Kenma."

"Wow... I knew Kenma was in town but didn't think you'd be here as well."

His head shot up "You spoke to Kenma?"

"Yeah..." you answered "He reached out to me and asked if we could meet up. I've been busy so I haven't had the chance..."

"Why didn't Kenma say anything to me?..." there was hurt in his eyes from the sudden news. "I thought Kenma of all people-"

You cut him off "I told Kenma that I didn't want you knowing. Don't blame him..."

"I see..."

The cars passed by, not knowing or caring about the two ex lovers on the sidewalk. Every person was moving on with their lives, focusing on getting home to their families.

You tried your best to calm your emotions. It was difficult to keep the facade up. Your body was itching to be again in his arms. "I should get going... goodbye Kuroo." you walked passed him hoping to forget you ever saw him.

However, Kuroo didn't want to let you go again this time. "Y/n, wait!" he yelled as he ran after you.

"He's not calling my name..." you repeated under your breath "He's not calling my name." Ignoring the loud sounds coming from the cars, you crossed the street.

"Y/n!" Kuroo yelled louder as he reached for you and held your wrist gently in his hand.

Looking over your shoulder, you made eye contact. "What are you doing, Kuroo?..."

"We need to talk." he gently spoke "It's been too many years."

"There's nothing to say about anything." you looked into his eyes "We both have our different lives, let's focus on that okay?"

"I don't want to walk away from you and regret it for the rest of my life again." Kuroo begged, "Please, give me a few minutes to talk with you...please."

Looking down at your watch, you saw you had some minutes to spare. "Okay..."

He let go of you, "Come on, I know where we should go." you followed him to the nearby bridge that was above an intersection along with shops down the street. You walked up the stairs and sat down on a bench that was in the middle of the two stairways.

It was awkward. As the seconds passed by, all you could think of were the things you wanted to say but felt afraid of saying it out loud. You were timid when it came to expressing how you felt since you were in high school. Yet when you met Kuroo that barrier was destroyed only for it to be rebuilt again a few years later.

"What did you need to tell me?" you asked, playing with your fingers.

"I'm sorry for how we ended things." your movement stopped "I thought back then that it was for the best. I didn't want to continue fighting every time with you. The amount of times we ended up apart became more frequent than the times we had ever spent together." His gazed was fixed on ground feeling too vulnerable to look at you "I didn't want to keep hurting you."

"I can't believe- why now?" you asked "Was that the reason you chose? You didn't want to stay and fixed things so you let me go?"

"We couldn't make things better and you know that y/n." he answered "Every time we tried it put distance between us more and more."

You closed your eyes trying to not let the tears fall "It's the fact that you lost hope in us that hurt Kuroo, not the breakup."

"It hurt me too..." he explained "But it hurt me more knowing you were suffering and not giving you the happiness that you deserved."

"I didn't care..." you sniffled "All I wanted was to be with you and solved it together. I kept on trying to find an answer as to what I did that was so wrong that made you leave me."

"What are you talking about-"

"You seriously don't remember?" you looked at him "The things you said to me that day... when I asked you why and all you said was because I didn't love you anymore, I don't want to stay by you. It's for the best Y/n go find your own life and forget about me."

He looked away, closing his eyes tightly. "I didn't mean to sound harsh..."

"But you did." you wiped away your tears "What hurt was the fact that you acted happy the last few days with me then suddenly... you ripped it off like a bandaid Kuroo..."

"I know..." he said "I know I fucked up- I kept thinking back every day after what happened."

You got up from the bench "Why did you pretend you were happy with me?"

"I wasn't pretending!" he exclaimed, getting up as well. "I was happy being with you."

"Could have fooled me... because knowing this now and you not remembering what you told me makes it harder to believe anything you say!"

"I need you. Trust me when I say that I still love you y/n." he stated.

"I-I can't..." you muttered, covering your face.

You were a sobbing mess, and it broke his heart that he was hurting you again when he vowed never to. Kuroo stepped forward slowly, trying to approach you.

"Please don't cry..." he said.

"I'm just tired of this... feeling this vulnerable and thinking about you," you admitted, "when I should focus on my future and not on the past..."

Kuroo stood in front of you, "Do you still love me?..." you didn't answer. He carefully took your hands into his own as he uncovered your face. "Do you still love me?..." he repeated himself.

His touch was arm, your head was dizzy. It's been so long since you were this close to him again. 'Did I still love him?' you thought, trying to figure out the answer on your own.

He gently wiped away your tears, "Because I haven't stopped Y/n... no matter where I'm going or who I'm with my mind goes back to you."

"Where was this 7 years ago?" you questioned "This love and worry you have about me? How you don't want to see me walk away from you again. Why did you show it too late to me? I wasted so much time wondering over someone who never once batted an eye to me when I saw you on campus those two years after our break up. I almost failed because my emotions were all over the place. If it hadn't been for the friends I had I wouldn't have moved on. Now you suddenly see me again one day and you confess you still love me? When you had chance after chance to tell me but chose not to." you clenched your jaw "You don't get to comeback and tell me you love me... it's not fair."

"I lived with the ache in my chest whenever I saw someone or something that reminded me of you. Out of all the y/n's in the world and each time someone said your name I turned around it hopes it was you but came empty every time it was a stranger." he breathed out trying to not break down in front of you but it became impossible. His voice cracked "I-I... still wish everyday that it had been you... y-you by my side a-and not someone else..."

"I wished we had met when we were older and wiser..." you whispered "Maybe then... this pain wouldn't exist within us."

He held your hand to his chest holding it tightly as he closed his eyes, trying to memorize your warmth. "We didn't know what to do... we were young and naive thinking love was such an easy thing to feel." he sniffled "It would be so easy... so damn e-easy... to say I'm sorry and start all over again. To go back to the days where were in l-love... without any problems..."

In all your years you had known Kuroo it was such a rare sight for him to cry and breakdown in front of you. After years, you were surprised to see he didn't feel shy or embarrassed of showing it to you again. It's like he had grown.

Gently you cupped his right cheek and he leaned into your touch. "I still do love you Kuroo..." you confessed "It scares me that I haven't been able to move on without you."

"I'm so sorry..." the pool of tears he held in his eyes were finally escaping "Maybe things would have worked o-out... if we had- no I had expressed my feelings earlier and told you how I felt from the beginning. If I had opened up myself up to you more and not runaway from the only person that had ever made me feel a whole. But I can't... I-I can't turn back time that was then and t-this is now..."

It was late. Yet hearing those words that you had dreamed for years to happen finally did. Life was definitely funny sometimes. One day you can keep convincing yourself you don't need that person that you're fine without them, then have it change with one interaction.

Smiling weakly you wiped away his tears. He smiled small feeling your thumb gently move against his cheek. "I can't believe I'm saying this but..." a chuckle escaped your lips "After all we've been through and still you make my heart beat like a teenager all over again."

"I would do anything to see you smile, Y/n." his eyes shined brightly as the sun's light reflected off his hazel orbs.

Your faces began to grow closer to one another. The space that was in between you two got shorter the longer you stared into each other's eyes.

"There's not anything else in this world that makes me happy as you do, y/n." he said.

Your foreheads gently rested against one another. His hands held your own tightly and brought them up to his lips. It made your stomach grow butterflies again.

Closing your eyes you focused on his touch not on the sounds of traffic. "I’d have my heart broken all over again if it meant that I could have those first six months with you."

He added "Those were the best months of my life."

Your phone then vibrated with messages coming in all at once. Kuroo freed one of your hands, you unlocked your device to see they were from h/n.

"Shoot..." you bit your lip.

"Is everything alright?" he asked.

"My...um boyfriend... is asking where I am..." you answered feeling conflicted as to what would be the best thing to do.

"You call him and reassure him you're okay." he said "If I was in his place I'd be worried too."

You were surprised by how mature he was, nodding you dialed his number. After a few seconds h/n picked up. Kuroo stood by your side and waited for you to finish.

"Y/n! Where are you I've been worried sick!" he exclaimed.

"I'm sorry... I saw a friend and they needed to talk to me. I didn't mean to make you worry." you explained.

He breathed out in relief knowing you were okay. "It's okay, I'm glad you're okay. Are you on your way back home or are you still with them?"

"I'm still with them I didn't realize it would take long. But I'll be going to the station soon to grab the last train home." you answered.

"Alright, are you sure you don't want me to go pick you up?" he asked "I don't want anything bad to happen to you."

"No don't worry I'll be home soon. I'll make sure to keep you posted okay?"

"Okay, please be careful. I love you." he said.

"I will, see you soon." you hung up then looked at him. "I should get going, Kuroo."

"I understand." he kissed your forehead softly "You don't owe me an explanation okay? Let's take it one step at a time. And if you still want to see me then I'll be here waiting for you. Like I should have done in the beginning."

Your heart swelled with joy that you wrapped your arms around his neck and hugged him tightly. He smiled softly hugging you back tightly, "I missed you so much." you spoke burying your face in his neck.

"I missed you too, Y/n." he rested his chin on top of your head "Can I take you home?"

"I'd like that."

It didn't matter how long it took, he wasn't going to mess this second chance he had with you. He would wait a year if he needed to to be alongside you again. You were his world.

#kuroo tetsurō #kuroo testuro x reader #kuroo x reader #hq kuroo #hq!! x reader #hq!! scenarios #hq angst #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu blog #haikyuu!! #haikyu x reader #haikyuu x self insert #hq!! fluff #kuroo tetsuro

[everyhowlmarksthedead]

no kisses needed.

© @sonsofeorl

JOHNNY ‘COCO’ CRUZ.

MAYANS MC ┃ USEFUL LINKS

❝ request by @blowmymbackout: reader has a co-worker who just won't take the hint that reader isn't interested and has a bf she tells Coco he picks her up from work confronts the man. Coco is a lil jealous. Co-worker facetimes reader while coco has her in this position (sorry if that didn't make any sense)

❝ words: about 1.2k.

❝ warnings: nsfw, unprotected sex, language, voyeurism (????), coco being a little possessive, mention of bodily fluids.

❝ a / n: as always, don’t forget to comment and reblog if you liked it!

You weren't expecting Coco to pick you up from work today, but you guess he has just done it to see who's the fucker trying to flirt with his girl. The guy is uglier than the back of a fridge, and he feels some comfort in it. But not enough to calm down his jealousy. He —better than anybody— knows that you don't care about a pretty face, you care about a beautiful heart, tho. His insecurities come afloat on your way back home, worrying you because he's more silent than ever, not even getting a response when you whisper in his ear how much you have missed him today after waking up alone.

Coming into your house with his face down, Coco leaves his kutte and both helmets on the coffee table, a second before falling onto your sofa. A leg over it, the other flexed to the floor. Your boyfriend looks at you, thoughtful and very concentrated on the way you have to remove your jacket and walk towards his position. You know exactly what's on his mind and that touches your soul. His demons eat him alive with no mercy. Kneeling a leg between his —placing your phone close to his black helmet—, you lean down with both hands on his chest for balance, landing your lips onto his left ear.

“Can you do something for me?” You hum with such a sweet tone, caressing his cheek with the tip of your nose. And you hear him swallowing slowly. “Fuck me, Coco. I need you so fuckin' much… You can't imagine… Can you do that for me, ah? Can you fuck me so hard I forgot my name but not who I belong to?”

He utters a feral snarl, noticing then that your right hand has made its way to his dick. You grip it over the rough fabric, swinging it with a tortuous pace, fixing your eyes on his. Coco is about to kiss you when you push him down using your left hand.

“I don't want your kisses now”. You whisper accommodating yourself over the delicious rock under his clothes. “I want your dick. I want you to fuck me till I have to beg you to stop”.

How does he manage to roll you down his body? You don't know. But the fact is that, in less than a second, you're lying on your stomach and your boyfriend is removing your sneakers and your jeans. He can't help but lick his lips keenly as he glances at the small spot darkening your panties, the evidence of how wet you are because of him.

“Fuck, ma'...”

Coco rips off the piece of clothing causing you to gasp, while you take off the shirt covering your torso, only leaving the blue bra you're wearing beneath it. He undoes it to throw it to the floor too, sliding an arm under your stomach to make you raise your ass. With his free hand, your boyfriend pulls down his jeans and boxers enough to let his hard cock spring free. He doesn't prepare you. Coco guides his glans to your folds to slam his thick length into your soaked cunt. You moan loud and clear his full name, as he settles his body between your spread legs.

Digging his fingers in your hips, aware that he probably will leave some marks there, he doesn't show any mercy. He hits your guts and your soul once and once with an insane pace that causes you to roll your eyes, nailing your hands on the armrest to find some equilibrium and receive every pound straight to your g-spot without falling over it. Coco is fucking you as hard as you have asked him, blanking your mind and making a mess of your vocals.

And he doesn't stop when your phone starts to ring. The name of your co-worker appearing on the screen. Your boyfriend has the brilliant idea of pulling your hair back by tangling his digits there, bringing his lips to your ear. His other hand grabs your device to put it at the height of your faces, sliding his thumb to answer the video call.

The first thing your partner can see is the pleasure gesture on yours, moaning and screaming Coco's name, not having noticed yet what he is doing until you hear your co-worker calling you.

“Tell him how good I fuck you, ma'”. Your boyfriend demands with such a throaty growl, thrusting his thick and hard length into you, impaling your body against the sofa.

“Shit…” You almost cry. “He fucks me so damn good”.

“That's it… Tell him… Tell him who you belong to”.

You know that he's enjoying it, but you can't answer when your partner hangs up the call. Coco can't help but laugh, tosing your phone to the table, to occupy his hand in a better place. Wrapping it around your throat, your boyfriend forces you to kneel on the cushions, sticking his chest to your back.

“Bet he won't forget”. He grunts into your ear, tilting your head to tuck his tongue within your mouth.

He drinks your pleas, your begs, your gaps, placing your fingers around his wrists, aware that you're not going to last much more because of what has just happened. And he feels it. He feels how your whole anatomy gets tensed with every push to your guts, creating an erotic melody of flesh against flesh. Pulling you down again and gripping your hips, Coco increases the pace of his lungs, giving you more pleasure than you can bear with, still enraged because of that shithead thinking he could have some kind of opportunity with you. You are his. Like your heart, your soul, your thoughts.

“Ah, fuck, baby”. You paint roaring, biting your lips until the metallic taste of blood floods your mouth.

The tickles in your lower belly grow by leaps and bounds, making your heart stop for a brief instant before the orgasm blows out all your senses and the electrical lash roams your back. It takes Coco only two slams more into your soaked pussy to cum inside you, filling you as much as he can press his body against yours. He doesn't feel jealous, nor angry anymore. He simply is too tired after that rough quickly, marking your skin wherever his teeth have reached it.

Loosening his grip bit by bit to pull his wet dick out from you, your boyfriend holds your phone again to take a picture of his warm seed spilling out from your abused lips. A piece of art under his dark eyes. Lying on your back and placing a smooth kiss on top of your head, he shows you the little mess he has done with a proud smile crossing his exhausted mouth.

“Was tha' what you wanted?”

“Uh-huh”. You whisper resting your cheek over your forearms, turning slightly at him. “Did you have fun, Coquito?”

“I always have fun ruining your sweet tight pussy, ma'. I don' even mind if that cabrón wanna come and look the next time”.

GENERAL TAG LIST: @mayans-sauce @peoniarose @destynelseclipsa @band-psycho @myakai13 @petlaufeyson @-im-fantastic- @horsesandwolvesaremyanimals @rocketqueen @rosieposie0624 @ellyseveronica @Jessprins13 @diaryofkali @ravenmoore14 @starrynite7114 @kenbechillin @miahelen @monkeyluver4546 @sheeshgivemeabreak @jadesamhart @rawrlittlepanda-95 @megapeacelovemusic-blog @katsav17 @skits90s @wildsould1221 @littlekittymeow @tenderclio @badame1240 @regalbanshee

MAYANS MC: @multiyfandomgirl40 @countryash345 @skyofficialxx @lovebennycolonmiguelgalindo @bellisperennis0 @chibsytelford @trulysuccubus @purrrrfect @witching-hour @leathercladmenfics @behindmyeyes-insidemyhead @queenbeered @sesamepancakes @gemini0410 @pinguinstudiert @oscars-wifeyyy @meteora-fc @lozaa94 @arveeee @joupym @hanster1998 @missswritings @arana-alpha @lucillewinchester @theocatkov @telfordlowmans

#mayans mc x reader #mayans mc imagine #mayans x reader #mayans mc #johnny coco cruz imagine #johnny coco cruz x reader #coco cruz imagine #coco cruz x reader #coco cruz

[thefallenbibliophilequote]

Clean

Loki x Reader

1989, chapter 13

"…"

Summary: It's hard to find the one, but even if you do find him it's always going to be a daily struggle to make it work. Can you even make it work after he broke your heart? The answer to that is complicated, but it all started when you found each other again in the stark tower- and that's where our story begins.

Word count: 7,224

Warnings: angst, some unreliable narrator, and… closure.

A/N: this is the last chapter of the series (besides the epilogue) and so the secret message of the song will not be at the top of the post but rather at the bottom. A perfect closer. Thank you so much for reading this, I worked so hard to write it and I am so happy that I get to finish it with you guys. I am so emotional right now.

A/N: a special thank you @chrissquares for the amazing dividers she made me, and to @nacho-bucky for beta reading all of this!

No one is allowed to repost my writing or steal or copy my work! Reblog on tumblr is fine.

Series masterlist

Song on Spotify and YouTube

Loki sat in his room on his soft bed; he used the soft delicate covers under his fingers to ground himself as he drifted into his thoughts.

He loved you, he loves you, he will always love you. He knew that, there was no hiding it. There was no hiding the feeling that erupts within him whenever he sees you smile at him, or when you touched him and everything else faded away but your touch, or even the feeling thumping in his chest when he spent the day without you.

He was in love- it was as simple as that.

You loved him, you love him. He knew that, you never let him doubt it when you saw him doubt himself at the very beginning of the relationship. He was clever enough to know that you never lied to him.

Will you continue loving him when you will give it all up? When this is all over?

"You what?" Loki was sitting on your couch and you were curled up against him, you fiddled with your shiny new necklace, a bright smile on your face as you looked up at him through your lashes.

"I love you, Loki." You straightened up a bit more so you could get a better look at him. "I really do."

"You love the necklace I got you," He stated, looking at the empty box on the table and then back at your passionate eyes. He was scared of what he saw there, he must have heard you wrong because you made no sense to him. You always surprised him like that.

"Yes, I do love the necklace." You chuckled a bit and then you took his hand in yours, forcing him to look at you. "But I was talking about you. I love you. It's as simple as that."

But it was not simple, not to him.

"But-"

"No but. I just love you. I loved you even before we got together." You held both of his hands now. Understanding flashed in your eyes as you saw what lay behind his. "Don't you ever doubt that."

He squeezed your hands and leaned in to kiss you softly. He knew he loved you. But when he pulled back the words died in his throat. He opened his mouth only to close it shut. Emotions like the ones you introduced him to never came easy to him.

"I know." You said. And of course you know- you always do.

He sighed in thankfulness and you brought him to you again with your hand on his cold cheek.

He will find a way to tell you someday.

So why would you want to leave him- forget his trace on your life? He wondered to himself. People fleeting from his life wasn't something unfamiliar to him, but he has never been so sure of someone staying than you, ever since he found you on that fateful rainy day and every day that has passed since he never thought you would leave him out of your own will.

Being wrong about people did not happen often to him, he could read everyone but you didn't make sense to him now.

A shutting of the door knocked him out of his own head and of course there you were, studying him before you quietly approached him and sat on the bed.

Silence spread as you looked around the room, noting the various large bookshelves with the clearly well loved books.

"Your room is nice, it's very you," you commented over the deafening silence, you couldn't bear it.

"I always figured you'd like my book collection, and the balcony. I thought I could read to you while we are drinking your favourite tea and sitting out there. We could laugh at all the oafs that passed right below us." He let out a humorless chuckle.

"That sounds like a perfect day." You bit your lip nervously.

"Then why would you give that up?" now you turned to face him, you failed to notice the unshed tears on his face.

"Loki," you choked on your words. "I don't plan to give that up, I don't plan on giving you up!"

"But you heard what he said! And you want to go through with that nonsense, when I told you that I will figure out a way for him to leave you alone." He ran his fingers through his hair. "Do you really want to get rid of your powers that bad that you don't mind losing me, or even your Avengers family?"

"I don't want to lose anyone, I just can't stay with these powers inside of me when now for the first time I know exactly how they feel and what they do- I don't want that poisoning me. It's like a wine stained dress and I don't want to- I can't wear it anymore. I can't Loki." You went to take his hand but he slipped beyond your reaches. You scoffed and went and this time took his hands to get him to look at you. "But just like you said, I believe that you can and will find a way out of this, I know you will find a way for me to get all of my memories back- I don't doubt it one bit because you are brilliant and more so determined. So this is the way that I can lose my powers but keep everything else that I love so so deeply."

"But-"

"No, no but- I love you, Loki, and I would never give you up out of will especially after all those times you got taken from me and even when you left me. I will never let you go away. I know you can do this- and that is why I want to go through with this. I want to lose my powers, you called it ever since we met again at the tower- that is not my life, and these powers aren't mine. And that is my decision. Which is why I need you to understand me right now, I need you to understand that I'm not going to lose you, and that I still love you forever and always."

Loki couldn't help then, but remember you in your favourite dress standing with him and staring at the sunset, he told you he would always remember that moment-and he did, but it wasn't until now that he realized what you were asking him.

You never took your eyes away from his. You could see the battle inside of him when he finally relaxed in your grasp and pulled you tightly into a hug. But sometimes a hug is just an excuse to hide your face. You didn't see the tear that slipped from his eye.

"As you wish, darling."

•

"You're insane, you are completely insane." Steve shook his head and looked between you and Loki, before talking to the god. "How come you are okay with this? No, this is insane."

"Steve, I understand you're scared but Loki will find a way to bring me back- it will all be okay. It might take some time but I will be back here making sassy jokes at you in no time." You walked to him and wrapped your arms around him.

"Punk it'll be alright, just think of it like when you put me under again in Wakanda." Bucky chimed in and he wasn't wrong- but for Steve it only made it worse, first Bucky couldn't remember him and he lost him for a long time and now if you go through with your plan then you won't remember him either. How can he be okay with it?

"Loki, don't you have anything to say here?" The captain walked away from your hug. The god averted his eyes to the floor; he opened his mouth calculating his words.

"It's her choice captain, I had my own reservations regarding it," Loki now looked directly at the captain. "But all I want is what's best for her, I will do what is needed."

"What about Odin, huh? He can't just do whatever he wants- so what if he wants to take away your powers! I will fight him if I have to, he can't force you to do anything."

"Well Steve, my father might actually send an-"

"I never knew that was an option, I never thought I would be able to live like I used to- without my powers. I know you can get me out of this, I know Loki can get me out of it but I want this. I agree to this." You cut Thor off and brought the attention back to you. Tony rose up then.

"How do you know that you can bring her memories back, mischief?"

Loki scoffed.

"I only lost the battle of New York because I wanted to so give me and my magic more credit." Then Loki surprised you and walked towards the door. "Captain, if I may?"

Loki gestured outside and you were surprised at how Steve went without any issue. The door closed behind the two of them.

It was a while later that they came back and you could see Steve's eyes were red.

"Why don't we order pizza and you can pick a movie to watch?" he suggested. You nodded at him and you could say that you didn't tear up then but that would be a lie.

So there you sat with your friends- with your family, and you ate pizza and laughed at the movie. You talked about everything and nothing. You lay against Steve's chest and he hugged you as the movie kept playing.

You treasured every second with them. You knew you will come back to them soon enough but it didn't make you any less emotional during the entire night.

Just because you will not remember forgetting anyone of them, just because you won't feel the lack, doesn't mean you won't miss them.

•

You fidgeted with Loki besides you as you got ready to enter the room that will end all of this.

"Are you sure this is what you want?" Loki rubbed your back and took both of your hands to stop you from fidgeting.

"Yes, I don't know why I'm so nervous."

"It's okay to be nervous my love, but I will take care of you."

"I know you will." You shyly smiled up at him and returned his hug. "I trust you."

Loki opened the doors and walked with you inside. The throne room looked the same and yet for you it felt the difference all the same. Walking with a different form of dread into the cold room and a loud beating heart- you couldn't deny the fear that still lingered there.

"So, you finally came. Step to the side my son." You scoffed at that when Odin rose from the throne, stepped down, and raised his long staff.

"Wait!" you yelled and grabbed Loki into a hug. "I'm going to miss you, even if I won't know it. Promise you'll get me back Loki, promise you will set it all back to normal." You didn't look at him.

"I love you, more than I ever thought I could. I know I claimed it impossible but I have fallen in love with you all over and over again." He pulled back to cup your face and whispered in a weak voice. "I don't know how to say goodbye to you."

"There's only one way I'd accept it." You smiled at him through the tears, "If you've ever loved me, say it like you are going to come back."

That brought a small chuckle out of Loki.

"Well then my love, it really was enchanting to meet you." he held your hand and bowed before you. "I'll see you around, my love."

You smiled widely as you curtsied and brought him back for a kiss. It was slow, delicate, and yet it held every emotion you needed to show and every ounce of love you needed to feel.

"I'll see you in a minute, Loki."

With a soft smile he stepped back from you, his own smile faded though when his father raised the staff and he heard a chant in the background and he sent an old ancient extortion spell your way. You kept your eyes on Loki, smiling at him and memorizing him. He will get you back, you will get him back. You had no doubt about it.

His eyes teared up but he watched you.

You watched him until the pain hit you and settled in your brain, until your eyes felt foggy when you looked on at the man in front of you, until white blinded your vision and everything turned black.

•

Opening your eyes slowly you saw the golden sun rays seep into the room from your window as you woke up. You stretched out on the bed and reached your hand out to your side and it was cold. You looked at your hand and at the space next to you, why would you reach out there? Something at the back of your mind felt odd but you shook your head- who was for some reason aching, and got out of the bed in your apartment.

You mind felt foggy, you couldn't remember even getting to bed but you must still be tired- you just need to wake up fully. It'll all focus up in a minute surely- you had no doubt about it.

You smiled to yourself as you heated water for your tea; the routine was familiar to you and helped you clear your head. You took the time to look around your apartment, it wasn't much but it was yours. You still remembered when you first moved to New York- it was so loud and foreign but you refused to let it take over you and so instead you let it be a new chapter, a new beginning, you let it change you into who you wanted to be.

You snapped out of your thought and made your tea like you always did, it was a Saturday morning and you couldn't wait to have a chill day in, reaching out into the cabinet for another glass, but you faltered- you must have forgotten that you already made your tea.

Sitting on the couch you saw the flowers on the table they were dying of thirst- you were never good with flowers, which is why you never got any. It was probably time to throw the flowers away, so you groaned before getting up and discarding them in the bin.

Finally settling on the comfortable couch you turned on the TV and flipped through the channels until you found your favourite show. Sighing, you sipped on the tea and enjoyed the content feeling this warm moment gave you.

•

Loki lay on the headrest of the bed in his bedroom. It was morning now, it's been a day since you disappeared. By morning gone was any trace of you from his life, and yet you still were all over him, he couldn't find a part of him that you didn't touch. He could never wash you away.

He saw you all around his bedroom now, with countless books open and scattered on his desk, his bed, and the entire floor. He searched all of them, trying to find what you told him he would.

But now all he found was an answer he did not want to think about. So he sat and stared at the wall.

The knock on the door hardly startled him, and he was not surprised when Thor closed the door behind him and leaned against it.

"How are you doing, brother?" Thor stayed put, noticing the blank look in his brother's eyes and the books that seemed to block his way forward. "Were you up all night?"

"How could I sleep?" he let out a bitter chuckle.

"Did you manage to find something?" Loki rubbed his eyes, he didn't know how to answer that question. His lonely heart was already starting to grow colder with each hollowed hour that passed through him. He sank into his mind again.

The captain followed him outside of the room you were in. he could feel his frustration and it matched his- just almost.

"What, Loki?" Loki continued walking forward until he found a vacant room where no one will see the two of them. The soldier stopped at the door for a moment, but once he stepped through then Loki closed the door shut behind him.

"I want to show you something, captain." Loki turned to him. Steve stood taller, his blue eyes were questioning when he saw what laid in Loki's eyes, it was the first time he was sure what he saw in the trickster was real. "But you are not going to like it."

"I suppose I did find an answer." He replied to Thor, remembering back to two nights ago, when he found the way out. Just not for him.

"Well, that is tremendous news!" Thor's smile dropped when Loki did not smile with him. "What is wrong then?"

"What do you want to show me?" Loki walked to Steve with two arms open and up in the air. "Did you manage to find something?"

"I want to show you a time from before you knew her, you see, I have always loved her- but I want you to see this before we talk." Loki asked him a silent question and Steve nodded when Loki put his hands on his temples and he felt a buzz course through him before he found himself sitting in an apartment he had never seen before and there you were sitting next to Loki- you looked so much younger, so did the god.

Steve continued watching the intimate moment between the two of you, he watched the way you looked at the god and the way Loki in turn looked at you when you didn't face him.

He almost felt uncomfortable, knowing that Loki out of all people was letting him look through his own mind and memories. And then he heard you.

"I could never be a hero." His look of confusion matched that of Loki who was talking to you on the couch. He could only assume that you did not know about Loki being a god back then.

That was when he really looked at you- seeing you. He opened his mouth and closed it, his heart sank when he realized what he saw in you that was so different. You were so… light, rather than heavy. Your eyes were brighter, and more innocent- more hopeful. And mostly you were just-clean. Clean of all the blood that you have seen with your powers, clean of all the guilt and hatred. He knew you were happy with them-he knew you felt the same way as he did- but you were different here, there was no weight above your shoulders and you were clean of it all and all that was left was peace and calm inside of you. He never saw that in you. As happy as you were with him and the rest of the avengers, and as much as he knew you, he never knew you like that- he never saw who you were before.

He took a moment to look at you again, promising to himself he will remember you like this- he knew now why Loki showed him this.

"Loki, get me out." He whispered with a defeated look on his face. A moment later he was back in a vacant room with Loki. "Is that what you want?"

"Do you understand me now, Captain?" Loki nodded and lowered his eyes a bit.

"I do." Steve refused to shed the tears he felt behind his eyes.

"I have decided to let her go." He struggled with getting the words out, but he knew he would follow through with his decision- it's what's best for you.

"You what? Loki, what do you mean you are letting her go?"

"I am not going to chase after her and get her back to me- that will only lead to bad things." Loki stood up from the bed and started to whisk the books away and back on their shelves. The night was long but he knew all that he needed to know now.

"Brother, she counted on you getting her back! She trusted you with that!" Thor has seen his brother act without a thought in rare times, but now it is clear that he has thought of it for a while and yet despite of all of its nonsense he still decided to act on that.

"She trusted me to protect her, so I am. Don't you think she deserves a life free of dangers and worries?"

Thor looked at his brother and shook his head, looking down.

"Perhaps she does, but perhaps you deserve a life full of love too. Perhaps you will get that once you stop self sabotaging any good thing that comes your way."

Thor walked out the door, leaving Loki in that empty room.

•

The rain kept pouring all around you as you walked through the park in the dark. You didn't know what it was about the rain, but somehow you found your peace in the middle of the storm, the more the rain gushed around, dancing with the wind, the more you felt calm surrounding you. You let yourself drown in the rain that surrounded you now until you could breathe again- standing there with your umbrella you decided to sit on a bench you found up ahead, you often found yourself sitting there all alone when you felt something was missing from your life.

You sat there in silence, letting the rain soak through you without it ever touching you. You opened your coat pocket and looked at the letter that was inside the open envelope. You've had to make up your mind at some point, every part of you should say yes and you knew that it did with every time you reread the message that was written inside. You were still a bit nervous, it was exciting so of course you were a bit nervous. You knew you would not say no to this opportunity, no matter where it came from. With a small secret smile you put it back inside of your coat. You brushed the place on your neck where a necklace should be and got up to head home, and as you looked up to the stars you could almost see a twinkle in the sky, from the brightest star in the sky.

•

"Do you think it's a wise idea, Tony?" Steve sat in the genius' office. Tony shrugged at that.

"It's been two months Steve, I can't take it and I know you can't too!" he took off his glasses. "Don't you want her back?"

"Of course I do Tony, but I saw her- she seemed really happy."

"She was happy with us too!" Tony threw back the whiskey in his glass before filling up another one.

"Pour me one too," Steve said and ignored Tony's look. He was too tired, they all were. "But I think maybe Loki was right to choose what he did."

"Then call this a loophole! As long as we keep it up, she won't notice a thing and then we will all get what we want. We can keep an act up and soon enough it will be like nothing's changed." Tony raised an eyebrow at him before drinking from his glass. Steve downed his- it didn't faze him at all but he wished it would.

"Okay then, do it."

"Already did." Tony smirked and Steve just groaned at his friend.

"Of course you did."

"Now we just wait, my letter was pretty convincing so I am sure she will get here soon, and then she will be home in no time." Steve clucked his glass with Tony's before walking out of his office and getting on with the stuff he had to do that day.

He took the elevator down to the ground floor and looked through the paperwork he had in his hands when the doors opened. He stepped outside only to see you walking to the receptionist's desk. He stood there staring at you as if he hadn't been tracking you for months, he noticed all the ticks you had when you were nervous. That's when he snapped out of it and went to get you before the Stark worker could talk or, even worse, recognize you. He could feel his own emotions bursting inside of him and he held himself back from taking you into his arms and hugging you.

When you looked into his eye and he saw that you didn't recognize him- not really- it hurt him more than he thought it would.

"Hi." Was all he managed to let out.

"Hi, Captain Rogers," you smiled at him and he found himself returning the smile. "It's an honour to meet you."

"Please call me Steve." He rushed out and then bit his tongue.

"Steve," you repeated and you were about to turn your head to talk to the Stark Industries worker when Steve stopped you.

"You're Y/N, right? You have a meeting with Pepper."

"Yeah I am, how did you-"

"I will take you to her." He turned to the worker and nodded briefly, "it's fine."

"Captain, I need her to sign in first-"

"The captain said we are okay here." You looked behind you to find a blonde agent that you recognized from the TV as Sharon. She looked at you for a moment, looked behind you, and then she sent you a small smile.

"I'll walk you up, is that okay?" you looked back at him again and you nodded, you didn't know why but those blue eyes seemed so… kind. Your nerves were already put at bay because he started talking to you.

"Yes, thank you Steve." You smiled at him again before he walked you back to the elevator.

When the doors closed you broke the silence, for some reason you could feel his nerves rise- you could see it in him, in the small ticks. "Don't you have other stuff you should do?"

He laughed a bit at that and you called that a win. Steve thought back to the day he met you.

"Yeah, but you seem much nicer."

"How can you tell if I'm nice or not? I never said I was nice, maybe I am mean and evil."

"No offence, kid, but you don't seem too threatening to me," You scoffed at him, and you didn't know why the chemistry between you was so natural, but you didn't care.

"How can you be so sure? I could be threatening, or I could even be a spy!" you raised an eyebrow at him when he laughed again, this time harder.

"I could still take you down if you are, it's easy." He had a shit eating grin on his face that you didn't like. Steve was waiting for you to retort back.

"Oh just fuck off!" you shook your head but then you burst out laughing when Steve replied, you were so much brighter and he loved it.

"Language."

He missed you so much.

•

You felt a bit lightheaded as Steve walked you through the halls, you walked with him as he told you that he will take you to the kitchen. It was eerily empty. The couches seemed so inviting and the floor to ceiling windows showed a stunning view that you could stand there and watch all day, now you wished that you didn't have the interview because all you wanted to do was stay right where you were.

Steve was worried about you though.

"Hey, are you okay? Is this too much for you?" He asked and you furrowed your eyebrows when you saw the concern in his eyes.

"It's fine, I am probably just worried about the meeting with Mrs. Potts, that must be why I have a headache." You ignored his other question and while it did seem odd to you how easy he interacted with you, you didn't question it- he always seemed kind on TV.

"Come on, I will get you some water from the kitchen."

When you entered the kitchen you realized where you actually were.

"Is this the Avengers' private quarters?" Steve faltered for a bit and when words failed him he decided to just nod. He cleared his throat before turning to you with a glass of water.

"You really didn't have to bring me here, I would hate to waste your time and intrude!" you took a sip. "I also don't want to be late for my meeting, which I already am…"

At the cringe in your voice he pulled out his phone and texted Tony about your situation, making sure no one will be around you just yet in case you will get overwhelmed. He couldn't know how the spell Odin put on you would respond to that.

"I talked to Pepper, don't worry about that, you don't need to worry when you are with me." He looked serious enough that you nodded and continued sipping on the water, you could already feel the headache fade away, Steve continued. "And you can feel comfortable here, I'm sure you will get the job so you will be here a lot- if you want, that is."

"Why would I be here?" Steve wanted to curse at himself for saying too much, of course you didn't know that detail- you shouldn't know that. Hell, you probably didn't know the details of what you will do- Tony could have bullshitted anything to get you to come here even when you had no reason for being chosen.

He couldn't help himself, he felt as if nothing has changed by the way you act and talk around him, but it was hard to remember that a lot has changed for him.

"Well, umm you see- it's in the job description- working for Pepper and all, it just makes sense that you will be here too because she is here a lot." He stuttered when you still had a look of confusion on your face, your head tilting a bit, you couldn't quite place him. "And also- Tony, they are husband and wife of course and- and he might need help too. Stark Industries is his after all so, that is what I meant, that's all."

"Okay…" you tentatively replied, noticing the blush that came up his flustered cheeks. He was trustworthy, so it is probably true. "I guess that I don't actually know why I am here- but this is an opportunity that I couldn't miss out on. I don’t know why he chose me or how he even knows me but- I want to be here, I just do."

The words seemed distant from you, and you looked to the ground not noticing the small relaxed smile Steve let out.

"Well, I'm sure you will fit right in here. Let's get you to Pepper then."

His smile only prompted your own and you let him take you to her, hopefully this will be a new start for you, and hopefully it will also quiet the small tingles you started getting in your head ever since you got that letter.

•

A month later you woke up to an alarm clock. You turned to your side and stopped yourself when your hand went forward. The alarm drew you out of your thoughts and you twisted around again to turn it off. You got up to start your day before you had to go to work.

You looked at your wardrobe before you decided to try out the shirt you got yesterday you couldn't help but buy it. It was in this beautiful shade of green that you were compelled to get it. You paired it with a tight black skirt and walked to your dresser. Opening it, you noticed a glimmer shining from the daylight that came through your window. You got out all the boxes and stuff that was blocking whatever it was from your view- you really needed to clean all of it, but you didn't care- you just wanted to get to that small box.

Like you thought- it indeed was a box. It was old, the golden glaze of it darkened but it was still beautiful.

"Now where did you come from?" you wondered aloud and you sat on your bed when you decided to open the delicate box. It was a bit heavy in your hand, you didn't know what it was made of but it seemed unreal- it was so naturally out of place with its beauty. You opened it slowly and in there you found a necklace, it was golden and unlike the box it was still shining. The symbol engraved onto it seemed so familiar and yet you could not remember where it is from, it was different from anything you have seen before, you must have bought it ancients ago. You must have. It took your breath away when you picked it up, so you needed air. You went out into your living room and there you sat on the couch, staring at it. Your mind was racing, no- it was searching- you didn't know what for, and tingles spread throughout your whole body.

You put it on and fiddled with it, the light weight of it on your chest was comforting as it lay right next to your heart.

You didn't notice the smile that lit up your face until you looked into the mirror before getting out of the door and heading to the Avengers tower.

•

Loki prepared himself as he walked the Bifrost leading to where Heimdall stood. He tried to calm his breathing and his racing heart, he felt as if he was going to pass out from the nerves. He just needed to get this over with fast.

Heimdall did not acknowledge the solemn look on the prince's face as he got ready to go to earth. He barely bothered to hide the dark circles beneath his eyes that could only be described as numb. With the black suit he was wearing one would think he was grieving, and maybe in a way- he was.

Loki fixed himself to stand up straighter and got ready for his journey. All he planned to do was go to the Tower, just to check on how everything has wrapped up quickly before leaving, and maybe in a way he wanted to be there one last time and see other people who are also living a life without you.

He nodded briefly to Heimdall and in a few second he was in the Avengers Tower, right on the top of it. He took the elevator down and when he didn't see anyone in the living room he called out to the AI and asked for Steve's location. He was a few floors down rather than in the Avengers' quarters.

He took the stairs down. The hall room was fairly empty. Different elevators stopped at the floor that was a pass-through to the Avengers center from the Stark Industries. At the other end of the floor there was a balcony that looked over the skyline of the daylight, it will be easier to call for Heimdall from there- it will be faster.

He walked forward and saw Steve and Natasha leaning against the main desk of the security guard.

He nodded to Steve when he spotted him, but Steve's eyes only widened when he saw the god.

"Loki."

"Hello, Captain." He nodded to Natasha who had the same surprised look on her face. "Ms. Romanoff."

"Loki what are you doing here?"

"I just wanted to come here to check how you were dealing with the group that took the weapons." The group that took you. Loki smiled shortly.

"Loki you should probably go-" the blond suggested and went towards Loki to try and lead him backwards to where he came from. Before Loki could question him, the redhead spoke up.

"Y/N is here, she is on her way here." Loki looked at Natasha and then at Steve who was standing in front of him.

"What?" Loki stammered, "Does she-"

"No, she doesn't know a thing, I promise." The god studied the soldier, his eyes sharper now.

"Then why is she coming here?"

"We hired her a month ago, so she could work here and we will see her." Natasha explained simply, blunt as always. He was thankful for that right now but he sent daggers towards Steve.

"I thought we had an agreement- that you understood."

"We didn't know you were coming. I do understand, and I promise that she is still safe, and she is having a peaceful happy life- she works for Pepper, not with us directly." Steve was quick to reply. "It was just too hard to say goodbye."

"You were not the only one who had to say goodbye." Loki's eyes were blank and Steve could see the hurt that seeped through. "But well then, I should go. I'm happy you got her back."

Steve stopped him when Loki moved to walk towards the balcony at the other end of the floor.

"Loki, you can come back too." Steve sighed, trying to get the god to agree to come back- he saw you being happy, but he also saw how you were lost- just lacking something a bit, he knew Loki was that something.

"No, I cannot. I'm a god- I could never give her the peace she deserves." Loki shook his head and lowered his blue eyes. He passed Steve and walked ahead when the elevator dinged and he looked up at the same time as you got out of it and walked towards Steve. When your eyes met his you stopped in your place.

Loki always loved when you wore his colours and now here you were- wearing his colours when you did not even know him. Only a couple of feet away, you stood in front of him and the world stood still.

You got out of the elevator and were walking towards Steve when you saw the person that was just a few steps away, in front of you. You were in the middle of the hall and yet you couldn't move yourself away, you couldn't stop staring at him.

You knew him, how couldn't you? You knew he wasn't from here, but he was different- it wasn't because you knew he was a god, but rather the feeling that came along with him and it felt as if it sucked you in.

You tried to snap out of it and you could suddenly breathe again.

"Sorry, I didn't mean to stare," you looked up again at the god who kept staring at you. Loki's eyes were wide, scared, in awe of finally seeing you again. Of seeing you not recognizing him. Before your mind could catch up you continued. "I'm Y/N."

You stretched your hand and walked forward a bit, waiting for him to shake your hand as you now stood a mere step apart. You got nervous when he didn't shake it, why did you want to shake his hand in the first place? You did not know.

Before you could take your hand back, his cold hand squeezed yours and you relaxed again, smiling shyly at him.

"It's nice meeting you." It's like you could see it all inside the shade of blue in his eyes when he smiled back.

He caught sight of the necklace you were wearing and he looked back up at you.

"That's a beautiful necklace." He said and you blushed at the compliment, his voice affected you in a way it probably shouldn't. You then realized you were still holding his hand and you took it back and fiddled with the necklace instead. You didn't see the hurt and disappointment in Loki's eyes when he too lowered his hand.

"Yeah, it's really pretty- I found it and I guess I just forgot where it came from," you looked back up at Loki who had an unreadable expression on his face and you didn't know why but- "but I still love it."

Loki swallowed and tried to form words while your own words were affecting him in ways you didn't even know.

You didn't know why you were so affected by him, he was so beautiful and your heart was speeding up and yet you felt so calm now, so relaxed, so- whole? You didn't want to break whatever it was that you felt right now, too curious by this feeling to recognize the two avengers that stood a couple of feet behind Loki.

"I heard you were working here, do you like it here?" he looked at you fondly, he just had to ask- he had to know that you really were happy like this, even if he is not in your life.

"Yeah, I do. I am so happy that I get to work here with Pepper!" you smiled at him, tucking your hair behind your ears.

"I'm happy to hear that, then. It's good that you are happy."

"The job is amazing," you chuckled. "But if you decide to throw another invasion, I hope you will think of me, I'd love to be your right hand woman."

He laughed and you treasured that look, you liked his laugh.

"As you wish, darling." He needed to let you move on, but he didn't know how to say it. "I won't keep you any longer, and I should go, but- it was enchanting to meet you, love."

You frowned at that, not wanting him to go. But you still had a silver of hope left inside you that maybe he will come back again.

"I hope I'll see you again, Loki." You smiled at him and he returned the smile. He looked you up and down, smiling softly at you again, before he did the hardest thing he had to do and walked past you.

You turned to watch him go, yet your mind was screaming something incoherent at you as if he was slipping away from your reach.

Loki walked out into the balcony with a heavy heart, but at least he got to see you again one last time, at least he got to see you smile and hear you laugh one last time. At least he knew you were happy now, and at least he got to call you his love one last time. He looked back at you as he got taken away and he found comfort he hadn't gotten before in your smile. And he knew it will be okay.

You still looked at him when you saw him get taken away by the bifrost, and smiled when he sent you one last look.

Then you turned your head back, touching the golden necklace again you smiled to yourself and stepped forward.

"She lost him, but she found herself, and somehow that was everything."

•

Tags: @ayybtch @buckys-other-punk @chaoticpete @madcrazy50 @mishkatelwarriorgoddess @the-departed-potato @rogerrhqpsody @onceupona-happilyeverafter-love @percabethismyotp14

#my writing #clean #1989 #loki x reader #loki #loki series #loki laufeyson x reader #loki laufeyson #loki odinson x reader #loki odinson #angst #fluff #loki angst #loki imagine #loki x female reader #loki mcu #loki imagines #loki fanfic #fanfiction #tom hiddleston #taylor swift #marvel #mcu #loki show

[penwieldingdreamer]

Dante's Prayer - Chapter 2

Another chapter for you guys, thank you so much for the likes and reblogs. Thanks to @fortheloveoffanfic for betaing again. Enjoy and let me know what you think.

Warnings: none

Words: 1582

Chapter 2

Amalie sat next to the vanity, watching the maid style her sister's hair. She had seen Mister Shelby, accompanied by his brother and Johnny Dogs, a friend of the family, and could already find the truth in the rumors spread about him. His eyes as cold and deep as the Atlantic in Winter and not even his smile could give them warmth. "Are you excited for the ball? Mother went all out, even a few cousins from Austria came to attend, móraí can't wait to meet the Shelbys."

"Do I really have to go? You know I hate balls and dancing." Saoirse whined, grunting as Doris pulled a curl too hard before she answered instead of the sister.

"Your mother wants you to meet your husband, miss, it won't do you good if you don't attend. Besides, I heard Mister Shelby is very handsome."

Snorting, the youngest of three heavily leaned her head on her hand, not sure what to think about all that swooning the two women were doing. "If you like him so much, why don't you marry him, Doris. I bet he wouldn't mind as long as he's had someone to warm his bed and take care of things he doesn't want to do."

"Now don't be that way, little sister." Amalie admonished, taking the pearl necklace their grandmother had given to Saoirse on her eighteenth birthday. "Who said anything about you warming his bed? That's what mistresses are for."

The comment was supposed to be in jest, yet it stirred doubt in the youngest daughter's heart. What if her husband would take another to bed? She despised the fact that she'd have to marry Mister Shelby, but she'd hate it even more would he take a mistress. Nothing was a worse fate in her mind than to shrivel away in a loveless marriage where both partners would do no more than sit across from each other and never utter a word.

"I do hope you were only joking, my dear." their mother's voice sounded sternly from the door to Saoirse's room. Her blonde tresses were swept back into soft finger waves framing her face and the small tiara their father gifted her, pinned to the top of her head. "The guests are waiting and you still aren't dressed for the ball."

Sighing, Helene motioned for Doris to fetch Saoirse's dress, while the lady of the house finished her hair and laid the pearl necklace around her neck. "Everything will be going smoothly and you'll see, you'll have something in common by the end of the night."

"What? That we both are forced to marry each other?" The youngest daughter turned to face her mother, feeling the anger rise again underneath her skin.

"You know your father and I are only looking out for you." Helene tried to reason with her daughter, her delicate hands tightly holding onto her shoulders. "I want you to be safe and if I have to marry you off to a man who can ensure that, then I will."

Clasping her own hand around her mother's, Saoirse let out a soft sigh. "I know, I'm sorry. The thought of having to live with a man I don't know and who doesn't know me made me anxious, I didn't want to upset you, mother."

Their eyes met in the mirror and even Amalie smiled at her mother and sister. Helene leaned down and laid a soft kiss on Saoirse's rose colored cheek. "You'll always have a home here, you know that. If Mister Shelby dares to only once lay a hand on you, I will have Johnny bring you back here and he will wish to have never been born."

"Thank you, mother." the youngest of three squeezed the hand on her shoulder, giving it a light kiss on the slightly wrinkled yet still soft skin.

"You're welcome, luv, but now get dressed before the guests think you ran away." Winking at her two daughters, the lady of the house left the room.

Amalie grinned at her sister, leaning back on her seat next to the vanity. "Well, I do hope that Mister Shelby will behave, it would be a shame to see his handsome face get scarred."

"I wouldn't know." Saoirse shrugged with a smile playing on her lips as she changed into her dress, the red silk and taffeta fabrics only slightly framing her body, keeping most of her curves hidden but giving the eye enough to be interested. "I haven't looked at the picture mother gave me. I didn't want to know the man that might ruin my life and freedom."

With a shake of her head, the oldest of three stood from her seat and helped her sister with the buttons on the back of her dress while Doris busied herself with taking the shift from the chair and cleaning up the slight mess around the room. “Well, little sister, you’re definitely missing out.”

"Miss, may I present the Shelby family from Birmingham." the butler told Saoirse, giving her a little bow as she saw the two men staring at her, no smile on their lips. Just their hard, cold eyes, as blue as the stormy Atlantic sea.

Snorting, Saoirse sent her a grin and they left her room with their arms linked, their heels clicking on the marble floor as they made their way to the ballroom of the estate.

Swallowing the lump that had formed in her throat, she moved forward with her hand held out in greeting, all the while feeling the scrutinizing gaze of the older woman behind them on herself. "Mister Shelby, it is a pleasure to meet you. I do hope that I will fit your expectations, considering we are to be we'd in a few weeks from now."

Snorting sounded from beside her and Saoirse wasn't sure if she had said something false. The Shelby brother in front of her gaped at her, mouth opening and closing, like a fish out of water and his eyes wide eyed and filled with uncertainty. "I do not believe this is a laughing matter, Mister Shelby, so please enlighten me."

"Forgive me, but it seems you 'aven't been informed well enough." he stated, a smirk playing along his lips, yet his eyes held no warmth, even with the mirth coloring his words. "It’s my brother Arthur you've been greetin' not me, Thomas, that you're supposed to marry."

She blushed the darkest shade of crimson as she remembered the conversation she had with her mother. It was the same day her parents had agreed to marry her off to Thomas Shelby and they had told her about the man, but stubborn as she was, Saoirse had run away, not wanting to see or hear anymore of the business man and gang leader from Birmingham. And now looking back at the smirking man, Saoirse felt the anger boil in the pit of her stomach. How dare he mock her for that honest mistake? If this was the way her married life with him was going to be, she'd stop it right there. If only she could slap that smirk from his face, granting her satisfaction for being the prick of a businessman that he was.

"Well, if you'll excuse me, Mister Thomas Shelby, there are other guests I have to greet." she ground out between clenched teeth and left the three Shelbys in the ballroom, Polly glaring daggers at her nephew. On the way out she ran into Niamh, one of their maids, hurrying out of sight with a haunted look. "Are you alright?"

"I'm so sorry, Miss," she mumbled hastily looking over Saoirse's left shoulder to where the Shelbys were still rooted to the spot but Arthur was watching the redhead closely, his eyes furrowed in confusion. "I-I forgot something, yes, something in the kitchen."

Taking a hold of her arm, the younger woman led the maid away from the party, the eldest Shelby brother hot on their heels while Saoirse asked herself why she was afraid of the man. "Has he hurt you, Niamh? Taken you against your will?"

"Nothing of the sort, Miss." She shook her head, her red waves bouncing with the motion. "I was stupid and in love."

Furrowing her brows, the youngest daughter of the Duke stopped them both behind a corner. "Then why wouldn't you want to talk to him? It could be your chance."

Niamh's eyes glazed over with unshed tears, thinking back to the day he said his vows and sealed it with a kiss. "It's too late for that. I wanted so badly to tell him that" but she broke off, shaking her head.

"What? That you love him?" Saoirse inquired, putting her hand on the maids arm, hoping to get a real answer out of her.

"No, at least not just that." she started, brushing away a stray tear that had escaped. "I wanted to tell him that I was with child, but he married another. Arthur is Jack's father." The little boy had been coming to the stables often enough, trailing after Owen who took care of the horses.

"What?!" the deep timbre of a voice pulled them out of their conversation and both women turned to look at the man that had caught up to them, blue eyes blazing like the stormy sea as he strode towards Niamh.

Arthur Shelby had been a father long before Linda told him about the child growing in her belly.

tagging:

@fortheloveoffanfic @fics-not-tragedies

#tommy shelby x oc #tommy shelby imagine #tommy shelby fanfic #tommy shelby #arthur shelby x oc #arthur shelby imagine #arthur shelby fanfic #arthur shelby #peaky blinders family #peaky blinders imagine #peaky blinders fanfic #peaky blinders

[anonniemousefics]

Hi! Could you do a fic where Kaz doesn't know that inej is home from sea, but he comes back late at night to find her asleep in his bed? ♥️

HELL YEAH I can. My friend, this kind of prompt is like my kanej crack. I can’t not. I will read it; I will write it; I will like it; I will reblog it. I have a problem, and I don’t care. Here’s what came of this! ❤️

-------------

Kaz hated snow. It rarely snowed in Ketterdam, but when it did, there was nothing that made Kaz loathe the world more. The cold clawed at his joints in his bad leg. It meant putting an unbalanced trust in his cane, which could betray him at the first slippery patch, and absolutely no one would benefit from Dirtyhands taking an unsightly spill into a puddle of slush and ice. It wasn’t a good look for a Barrel boss.

If Kaz could have had his way, he would have holed up in his office at the first snowflake and not left until the last puddle had evaporated from the cobblestones. But that kind of indulgent behavior was the very thing that cost Per Haskell the Dregs.

So, there would be no rest for Kaz. He still needed to get paid, even in a blizzard.

He was grumbling to himself as he hoisted his aching leg up the steps of The Slat, snow piled on the black shoulders of his wool coat, dusted across his dark hair. His socks were soggy, and the hems of his black slacks were soaked up his calves, and it was safe to say it wasn’t the fresh blood on the cuffs of his shirt that was making him feel wretched. He couldn’t wait to change his clothes.

He was clenching his jaw to keep his teeth from chattering as he turned the key in the lock to his room in the attic. He shoved the old door open. In the far corner of the attic was a small, pot-bellied stove he’d been dreaming of lighting the whole trudge home. He was so close to finally being warm again.

It took his whole focus for a few minutes: throwing in the logs, trying to get his freezing hands to handle a match. But after a moment, the first few licks of flame took to the kindling, and he closed the door of the stove. He rubbed his gloved hands together, furiously, trying to coax some feeling back into them.

And then he froze. And slowly reached for his cane.

There had been a sound in the room. A sound that had not come from him.

He rose slowly to his feet, all shadow in silver moonlight from the window behind his desk. Gooseflesh prickled along the skin of his neck beneath his turned up collar. With each passing second, he was becoming more convinced he was not alone.

When he turned, he wasn’t sure if it was a trick of the moonlight at first. There was a distinct, large lump in his bed. He hadn’t left it mussed and unmade that morning. Something – or someone – had been there.

Or was still there.

The cane spun absentmindedly around his hand as he tested its weight, steeling himself. This was unusual but not something he couldn’t handle. The blood on his hands was a testament to that.

He stepped closer and, with the beak of the crow’s head end of the cane, he began to peel back the comforter. If he needed to, he would use that crow’s head to brain whoever he was about to uncover, and he already knew where he could dump the intruder’s body, too. Maybe after he was warm again…

But, in the soft orange glow from the stove, he stopped. His breath caught.

Inej?

Inej was asleep in his bed.

Kaz wasn’t expecting her to dock again Ketterdam for at least another week. But here she was, buried beneath the layers of quilts and sleeping with her arms around herself, huddled against the cold.

For a moment, Kaz forgot all about his own freezing, wet clothes. She’d slept in his bed before, but it had been a thoughtful arrangement, a risk, a battle against their own inner demons. This was entirely different. There’d been no discussion. She’d come without asking. She’d known she would be safe here. With him.

Kaz thought his heart might explode. He couldn’t stop staring, like the scene might vanish if he blinked. Her dark eyelashes spread against her brown cheekbones in soft repose; her black hair had loosened itself from her braid, falling in waves around her face. Was it possible to die of something wonderful?

He wasn’t sure what to do. For starters, he quickly set down the cane, eager to bury whatever murderous plans he’d been concocting for the mysterious intruder. And then he moved to cover her again.

Beneath the blankets, Inej started to shift and stretch. She made a soft sighing sound Kaz immediately wanted to hear again, and her eyes fluttered open up at him. And she smiled. Damn. He wanted that again, too.

“You’re back,” she whispered, in a happy, sleepy fog.

“So are you,” Kaz said, smirking down at her. That face of hers. He wanted to climb the bed and kiss every inch of it. One day soon, he would greet her returns this way, he swore it.

“I’m sorry I wasn’t able to write you our change of plans,” Inej was saying, with slow, groggy blinks as she reached for the lapel of his jacket.

“Yes, shame on you.” Kaz had a crooked, teasing smile as she tugged him closer and he leaned over her. “How dare you turn up in my bed looking so perfect.”

In the flickering orange glow from the stove, Kaz noticed Inej’s gaze flit over his mouth and back to his eyes, and his stomach flipped. She’d thought of kissing him, too. They had, they could – but, as much as he hated to admit it, it took Kaz some time to warm up to it. He didn’t trust the waters to not rise if he bent his head and took her lips now, not when it had been so long since the last time they had touched.

Inej knew this – Saints, he loved her for it. She did what she always did when she first returned from the sea. She lifted her fingers to her own lips, kissing them, before slowly reaching out to barely brush her fingertips against his mouth, sending his heart pounding. Maybe, just this once, maybe he could—

“You’re dripping on me,” Inej groaned, abruptly, and wiped some melted snow off her face. Scratch that. Kaz pulled back and straightened himself, running a gloved hand through his damp hair.

“Quite a snowstorm tonight,” he said. This is what calm, collected people did, right? Talked about the weather? “I’m glad you’re not at sea. Though it couldn’t have been much warmer in here, with the stove out.”

“I was hoping my bedmate would be here sooner to warm the sheets,” Inej said, with a tantalizing huskiness that was really unfair. Kaz felt the ache of desire thrum in his gut, and he was at a loss of what to say. He swallowed hard and went for what he always did when Inej flummoxed him – the laugh.

“Who? Where is he?” he frowned. “I’ll kill him.”

It worked – Inej laughed behind her hand, and Kaz couldn’t contain his stupid grin.

“Let me change out of these wet clothes first,” he said, beginning to pull at his leather gloves.

But Inej rolled up out of the blankets to her knees and inched closer to the edge of the bed, to him. He wouldn’t pull back – he wouldn’t. A moment later, it was no longer a worry. Her sleep-warmed body heat radiated toward him in the cold, and he felt pulled to it. She was in one of his shirts – it hung to her knees – with her disheveled braid loose over her shoulder. He wanted to put his hands to her waist and pull her up against him. Maybe, just this once –

And then his mouth went dry. Inej began running her small hands up under his coat, across his shoulders, pushing it off. She looked up at him through thick lashes, a question in the air.

“I can help you,” she offered, lowly. What had gotten into her tonight? Which of her Saints should he be thanking for this?

And his dark wool coat dropped to the floor.  

When Kaz looked back down at her, Inej had her fingers at his top button. She was close enough now that her body was just barely against his. If she arched her back, her breasts would press up against him and – well, that was definitely a mental image Kaz would be hoarding for later. He swallowed hard at the thought.

Inej undid the first button and glanced up at him, her brows cinching together – checking on him. He drew in a deep breath. Every one of his nerve endings buzzed, but he was ready to push past it all - he had to see where this was going. Slowly, he raised his hands, lightly cupping the backs of her elbows. Holding her there in a silent plea that she stay the course.

The fire crackled and popped in the stove as Inej slid her fingers through the buttons, one, two, three, all the way down, until his shirt was open to her. And then she held her palms back, away from his skin, looking up at him with expectant eyes. So, he shrugged off the shirt, and, when her expression didn’t change, pulled his undershirt over his head, too.

He knew she’d seen him this way before – had hoped she had, if he was being honest – but, now, looking at her face. Her chest rose as she took in a breath, looking him over, his eyes drifting down to his waist. His face was warm, warmer than it’d been all day. She tugged at his belt. Now other parts of him were warming, too.

Maybe…just this once…

And while his belt buckle clicked open in her hands, he slid his bare hands around the curve of her waist.

For a moment, she looked unsure. For a moment, he felt it, too. But, in a quick mental game with himself, he decided to play it off as stabilizing himself to kick off his shoes. He relaxed even more when she chuckled under her breath at his attempts to wriggle his feet out of his wet socks.

“I was not expecting you’d actually need my help,” Inej giggled, as he stumbled again over the stubborn, clingy sock. He finally had to let go of her and wrench the damn thing off, and at that, Inej laughed harder. And Kaz couldn’t take it anymore.

Without a thought, without a care, when Kaz straightened himself again, he took that adorable face of hers into his hands and kissed her.

Just like that. With hardly a warm up at all. He kissed her, and he kissed her again until he felt the breath rush out of her. She pulled his waist to her, her body pressed to him, as she parted her lips against his. Desire flooded his veins like a dam had broken; in another lifetime, in one less broken, he could see himself pushing her down into the sheets, slipping his hands beneath the shirt she wore, covering her body with his.

Maybe one day. Soon.

As it was, though, he felt her hands snake up his back, and an unwelcome jolt of panic speared him. He flinched, drawing in a sharp breath, instinctively dropping her face and pulling back.

“I’m sorry.” Inej was instantly apologetic, before Kaz even opened his eyes. “I’m so sorry. I got carried away--”

She had pulled back from him, holding her closed fists near her chest, like she’d slapped herself in restraints.

“Inej.” Kaz’s head was spinning, but it wasn’t entirely unbearable. He inhaled, exhaled. This was already more than he’d ever hoped for. She had nothing to apologize for. He just had to catch his breath to say it.

“I am really happy you’re back,” he managed to rasp, his breathing gone ragged. And Inej’s smile glistened in the dim firelight.

He changed into his sleeping clothes, folding his snow-damp clothes over his desk chair to dry. Then he slid under the comforter next to Inej, the layers of blankets a haven of her warmth and her scent. And he was content that at least this, this moment with her, he would no longer have to only hope for. This moment, at least, had arrived.

#six of crows #soc #crooked kingdom #mini fic #kanej fic #kanej #kanej fanfic #kaz x inej #kaz brekker x inej ghafa #thanks for the request! #my asks #requests #kanej drabble