#I know I'm just screaming into the void but I just had to share that random thought because I love it so much | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

idcbabyialreadylostmymind · 1 year

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L'appel du Vide

Pairing- Sully Family x Sully!Reader

Summary- You feel the urge to engage in destructive behaviors just to feel alive and your family wants to get to the bottom.

Pt.1 pt.2 pt.3

Warnings- self destructive thoughts/actions, getting slapped, biting someone's ear off, hateful thoughts, description of self harm, self harm, blood/bleeding, crying lmk if I missed something

A/N- did I cry writing the last part bc of my crippling mommy issues yes yes I did but we don't talk about it also tell me how it is 🤭🤭

It's like a call to a void, the adrenaline of putting yourself in danger. Like jumping off a cliff not knowing if your banshee is going to catch you, or slicing your hand with an open blade, or getting into a fight with someone ten times bigger than you. It made you feel real, made you feel alive. And if your not doing it your thinking of it. So why wouldn't you go with your siblings to the old battle field.

"Tuk keep up." Lo'ak said as you pushed a branch out of the way. "Why'd you bring her?" Spider asked and Lo'ak huffed. "She's always like 'I'm telling if you don't let me come you know your not supposed to go to the old battlefield " Lo'ak mocks your younger sibling only making Spider laugh and you roll your eyes at his childish tactics. Tuk pokes her tongue out at him and Kiri comes to her defense. "Don't pick on her." And finally you make it, you and Lo'ak crouch Kiri beside you. "Dad is going to ground you," she whispered to you, "shush can you stop." You reply and she only rolls her eyes. "For life."

behind some bushes you and Lo'ak look around there was all kind of rubble and metal on the ground you hit Lo'ak on the stomach to get his attention. "Let's look around." You say before immediately jumping back, Avatars. "Shit." You whisper Lo'ak looks at them his body freezes. "We have to tell dad." Kiri whispers. Lo'ak goes to touch the microphone on his neck. "Hey dad." Lo'ak whispers, your eyes were glued to the avatars.

"Lo'ak." You hear your father's gruff voice over the ear piece. "Yes we are at the old battle field and there are some Avatars we've never seen them." Silence, "Who is we." Was all your father said afterward you and Lo'ak share a look. "Me, Y/N, spider, Kiri and Tuk." He paused before he said Tuk and you could hear your father sigh. "Just stay safe, Lo'ak Lo'ak!"

Suddenly before you could think your queue was being pulled roughly making you wince in pain. You look around at the kidnappers around you. The avatars. "Show me your fingers." An older man said to Lo'ak and he flips him off and give a screechy hiss and you laugh loudly making Lo'ak chuckle. "Your his alright and you," he says turning around to you pointing a finger. "Your a cute little thing aren't ya' think that's funny?" He asked. You cringe at his statement. "I do actually." He smirks gripping your face. "We'll keep you." He said and all you did was hiss it was deeper and louder than the one Lo'ak previously did.

He gives you a hard slap and all you did was smile as you hear your mother's war call. The man's face fell, "I will kill you as many times as I have to demon." Was the last thing you heard before you saw your father and brother, Neteyam sweep in and get the avatars holding your siblings but they couldn't help you but you didn't need any. As your father held you sister in her arms you took this chance to kick the man holding you kick him in the knee he filps you around arms locking around you and before you knew it you opened your mouth clamping down on the first thing near you and it came off in your mouth the taste of iron on your tongue filling your mouth, the man screamed letting you fall to the ground. You jump up and spit the piece of skin in your mouth blood spilling from it as you spit. "She bit my ear off! The bitch bit my ear off!" He yelled you smiled as you pick a gun up that he had dropped and run off next to your dad.

It was hell after you got home. Your father yelled at you and Lo'ak about how irresponsible you two were and how stupid it was to attack the man holding you. But, this was the usual for you not taking anything to heart but you could see Lo'ak every heart breaking thing your father said to you two it stabbed him a hundred times over. And then your father put everyone of lock down and suddenly everything darkened around you, it felt like you were a dead person in someone you didn't know, like your family and friends weren't really your family and friends.

So there you are sitting at the back of your families home watching the sky, you had the razor blade you swiped from Norm in hand and all of those bad thoughts flew into you again. You griped the balde t as tears fell down your face, "Your not real." Your head thought. "Your nothing." The thoughts consumed you as the blade got closer and closer to your skin and it made contact you held it to the base of your palm. Your eyes clench closed as you held the blade hard and sliced all the way down, the throbbing pain was there and then you take the balde off of your palm and as the blood dropped from your hand, and a sense of comfort fell over you.

Your mother looked at your hand as she wrapped it up, "And you say you accidentally cut yourself when sharpening your dagger." She asked once again and you smile. "Yes I was being stupid I know." You laugh as she lets go of your hand. Before you asked your mother to wrap your hand your father gave you the news you had to leave, it hurt it really did you were leaving the only place you called home but you knew you had to stay strong for your siblings for your Mother.

When you finally made it to the Meykayina all of their eyes were on you and your family it was strange, unsettling. It only got worse the more you stayed there people made fun of you, of your siblings. And that feeling you knew all to well came back you had to cut, and everytime you had a quick explanation. Soon you had scars in various parts of your body, on your sides, inner and outer thighs, your calfs, you even had to wrap you hands up. And after an altercation with Lo'ak and the chiefs son they were forcing you and your siblings to hang out with him and his sister Tsireya. She was nice, sweet you sort of envied her but didn't show it. "Hey forest people." Ao'nung laughed and all you did was roll your eyes. "Hey fish boy." You reply opening your eyes and giving him a sarcastic smile.

He looks taken back but Kiri and Lo'ak burst into laughter as Neteyam hits your arm. "Let's get this day over with." He said getting the ilus saddled up. You stand up and head towards your ikran and they just look at you. "Forest girl where you going!?" Ao'nung yells and you turn around. "I'm going to ride Amhel." And then Neteyam huffed. "What is wrong Neteyam?" Tsireya asked as she lifted her leg over her ilu. "When she rides Amhel that means shes gonna do something stupid and then get in trouble for it." He shook his head as you jumped into her and connected taking off into the sky. It was a dangerous speed, but you didn't care. You did all kinds of things in the air the farther you got into sea. "Flip upside down." You thought and that's what she did. "She's not strapped in!" Tsireya yells watching you as you let your arms swing in the air. Neteyam watched he hates when you did this, but he couldn't stop you.

You made it to the island you land on the warm sand and hop off as the other five to make it to you. Kiri hit you upside the head. "Why are you so stupid always doing dangerous things." She scolded. "Ah and it's not dangerous it's fun have some." You joke rubbing the sore spot she made. "Fun? We rather keep our lives thank you." Neteyam chimed in and you only rolled your eyes. "If I wanted to get scolded I would have stayed with mom and dad..." Trailed off by seeing a huge rock. It was beautiful it started in the water where it has a teal ring, and it goes up as moss and leaves grow on it, it had to be at least fifty felt in the air. "Y/N don't." Neteyam spoke, to late.

You rode Amhel up to the rock and looked down you were sure to die if you jumped and no one caught you. "Perfect." You thought.

Meanwhile on the shore your older brother and sister sit down and put their face in there palms. "Told you, something stupid." Neteyam muttered to the group. Ao'nung had his transparent eyebrows furrowed as he looks between you and your brother. "What is she going to do?" He asked as you got of of Amhel. "Just watch it's so cool." Lo'ak said.

You disconnected you queue as you let the side of your head. "Remember catch me." You whisper to her and she only gives you a small chirp in response as she takes flight. She circles around the rock getting ready to catch her rider. You take one more look down stepping back a few steps you take a deep breath. Closing your eyes you run and jump. Falling through the air you could hear Tsireya yelling, "She's gonna die, she's not gonna catch her!!" This time your siblings got up and started yelling Neteyam jumped to his ilu ready to rush toward you and then everyone stopped as the heard you. "Why are you guys so serious." From behind them.

"Holy shit that was cool." Lo'ak laughed you got off of Amhel and walked to them sitting down in the sand letting the warm sun hit your skin. "I thought you were going to die." Tsireya said sitting down next to you. "Not today." You say smiling as you close your eyes.

"You did What!" You father yelled, you have Lo'ak a side eye, why did he have to be such a blabber mouth. "It wasn't anything serious me and Amhel used to do it all the time back home." You say putting your hand on your hip. "Okay we'll talk about that later but you jumped off a cliff that was over fifty feet in the air, what the fuck is wrong with you." Clenching your teeth, "Nothing is wrong with, I'm sorry I'm not an uptight asshole and like to have fun." You say suddenly feeling defensive as to why he asked what was wrong with you. "Don't curse at me and that's not fun you could have killed yourself." He yelled and you only rolled your eyes. "No more riding Amhel." He said and your face dropped. "What t-thats not fair." You protest before your father clicks his tongue. "Fine." Was all you said before storming up to your room of the pod.

It had been a little past eclipse and your shoulders felt heavy and that question ran through your mind over and over again, "What the fuck is wrong with you." Your father's words never stuck but this did. Your hands shaked you jumped out from under the hand-made blanket your mother gave you. You tiptoe over to your bag and rummage through it and you found it. You bit your lip as you looked at the blade. You sit on your cot and grabbed the blanket you were previously covering up with, putting it between your teeth you bit down, now you look at the blade and you press it onto your upper arm, pressing down hard you guide the blade down you sighed and bite the blanket because of the pain, but the more pressure you put into the cuts the more mental relief you felt. You dropped the blade and looked at your hand you held it so hard it cut through your fingers.

You let the blanket slip through your teeth and your breath was heavy and then you look up and your eyes were met with ones of your mother. You gasp. Flipping the blanket over your arm and hide the blade. Neytiri walks closer bottom lips shaking, "Show me." She demands and you only look away wiping the tears away from you face. "Show me." She says this time a little harsher. "Fine mom, you wanna see!" You say loudly getting up and the balde falls to the ground, you show her what you had just did, then you ripped the bandages you had on your thighs and then your hands. "Is this what you wanted to see." You say crying. Neytiri tilts her head as she falls to the ground. "My baby, my daughter my special girl." She cried out holding the blade throwing it across the room. "Mom don't cry." You say holding yourself looking from your mother's broken figure.

Neytiri was gasping through her tears, "Was it me was it Jake, did we do something, did we do something wrong I know we haven't been the best parents but I tried to protect you I-"

"No it's not you or dad it's me I'm fucked up, I'm fucked up but it's not you mom it's not you." You say falling to the ground next to her. She looks at you and holds your arms, going over every scar she helped heal and guilt fills her. You cry watching her reaction and then she brings you close, "It's okay my special baby, my sweet girl." She coos rocking you back and forth as your tears soak her chest. "I'm sorry mama I'm sorry."

"nothing to be sorry for my sweet." She said guiding you back to the bed holding you she pressed sweet loving kisses to your wrist. "Nothing wrong my sweet girl." She whispered holding you as she did when you were a child and your cries softened and your eyes began to get heavy for the first time you felt loved, you felt safe.

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konniesreality · 4 months

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Hey Konnie, I'm going to share my success story with you.

So, for context, I've known about the void for I think over a year and I've been in the LOA community since I was 8. I've also had the most disgusting life all around especially when it came to my spiritual life but that's not important right now.

I've always been lazy when it came to the void, like on one hand I was like "Finally a method that guarantees success no matter what" but on the other hand I was like "Ugh, this is too much I don't feel like doing this right now" and kept making excuses. Because I knew about waking up in the Void State I'd go to bed and just fall asleep after listening to subliminals and affirming thinking that was going to do anything for ME personally. (P.S. just because it didn't work for me doesn't mean it won't work for you.) I did this for MONTHS and kept wondering why it wasn't working. Like I knew I was lazy but I just really couldn't bother at all...until recently.

I decided that I wanted to change and that I'd go back to the basics of the Void. I switched out the subliminals that I used before and created a fresh playlist. Link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLA_GYb1XT6i7XafhzWTNCnerDt1x9HOiz I simply worked on fulfilling myself internally and went within entirely. Then, two weeks ago I randomly decided to just "meditate" into the void. So, I just laid down, stayed still and RELAXED. I didn't even think about the Void, my attention was to simply relax and be. Eventually, I did relax to the point my body went slightly numb so I took it as a sign to start affirming for the Void. The affirmations I used are "I am" and "I am void". I started experiencing soooooooo many symptoms such as the floaty feeling, losing my senses, the darkness behind the eyes getting darker (I wanted my void to be pitch black hence why it got dark) also that really weird eye fluttery thing idk what that is called but yeah I had that too. I was literally spinning and my heart was about to jump out of my chest istg BUT I focused on my breathing and my affirmations.

Then the weirdest thing happened. Now, mind you, I've NEVER gotten this close to entering the Void IN MY ENTIRE LIFE. But I kid you not, I felt myself literally DETACH from my body, well I more felt it in my face/head because I couldn't feel my body but you get the point. Like I felt HOLLOW like WHAT. I was internally screaming and I started to smile because I was like "I'm finally entering the void after how long now." Buttttttt when I was literally five seconds away from entering the Void completely my lovely father came in the room to ask me something so I OBVIOUSLY snapped out. (Still salty btw) But I can tell you that I was 90% in the Void and they weren't lying about feeling pure bliss and happiness and feeling calm as well as being one with yourself because I felt it too. And when I "got out" I felt SO SMUG cause I was like, I finally figured out what method works best for me AND I know when and how to do it.

So, my directions in case you want to try it out.

Go to bed around 30 minutes - 1 hour earlier. Or do it when you're going to take a nap, but it works best for me at night. Also, make sure your eyes are like slightly burning, not ask why just trust me. but not to the point it's watering just enough to make sure you're a little sleepy and will make you relax easier because I find that works best.

2. Then, relax your body and allow all thoughts to float by, don't pay any attention to it. Also, focus on your breathing. (You can do breathing techniques but I just went with a slow but natural pace of breathing, for me of course)

3. ANY SYMPTOMS IGNORE THEM ALL!! It may be hard but honestly, it's kind of like ignoring someone when they talk shit- bad example but you knowww. Just focus on breathing and affirmations here.

4. Make sure to affirm when you are ready, trust me you will know because it'll be like a gut feeling. Or when you feel really relaxed like you're in a tropical paradise or something just start to affirm. Also, I would imagine things that I'd be doing in my hr (home reality) because affirming is kinda boring after a while so I interchanged them.

And that's about it, I think the important thing to take away here is to do what works FOR YOU. If you know that this method doesn't work for you but you saw it works for me, that is not an invitation to change your method. Also, remember always that the void IS YOU, it will not exist without you so don't put it on a pedestal. You got this always and have fun living your dream life. You were born a master of the void so no excuses.

Also that new subliminal that you made is LITERALLY the only sub I use now and it's BOMB. But I obviously linked my playlist bc I used to use it.

OMG IM SO HAPPY FOR YOU!! Thank you so much for using my subliminal and most importantly sharing your success! It’s the truth! Find what works for you and R E L A X I know you will get in again!! TSYM for linking the playlist too! 💕💗💗

#ask #void state #void state success story

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musicforastylesrestaurant · 2 months

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In The Stars.

masterlist || ask me anything <3

my blurb masterlist is here x

in which, harry is remembering you, his beloved wife, mother of his child, that passed away, this is him grieving, remembering the lives that the two of you shared together and will always share together, no matter the circumstances.

word count - 2.8k

warnings: mentioned of death, mentions of breast cancer.

April, 2010.

❛ Sunday mornings were your favorite

I used to meet you down on Woods Creek Road

You did your hair up like you were famous

Even though it's only church where we were goin’ ❜

As Harry strolled down Woods Creek Road on a Sunday morning in the summer of 2010, the sun cast a warm glow over the quaint street.

His heart raced with anticipation as he made his way to meet his girlfriend, who awaited him at their usual meeting spot on the corner.

The two of you were meeting up just like the two of you did every Sunday morning before heading to church and meeting up with your families. It was a little ritual that would forever be engraved in your hearts.

You stood there, radiant in a pretty light pink summer dress, your hair elegantly styled up in a bun, giving you an air of effortless grace. Even though you were just headed to church, you always carried yourself as if you were destined for the spotlight.

As Harry approached, he couldn't help but admire how stunning you looked, a sense of pride swelling within him for being the one lucky enough to call you his own. Your eyes met, and a smile lit up your face, sending a rush of warmth through Harry's veins.

"Hey pretty girl," Harry greeted you, his voice filled with affection as he reached out to take your hand in his.

"Hey, H," you replied, your voice soft and filled with love. "You look handsome today."

Harry chuckled, a hint of pink coloring his cheeks at your compliment. "Thanks, pretty. You always look beautiful."

Together, hand in hand, you made your way to church, the sound of birds chirping and the rustle of leaves in the gentle breeze accompanying your steps.

As the duo walked hand in hand towards the church, he couldn't help but admire her beauty once again.

"You know it's only church that we're going," Harry teased with a playful grin, nudging her gently.

She laughed, a melodic sound that echoed through the quiet street.

"I wore this dress to look good for you," she replied, her eyes sparkling with affection.

Harry's heart swelled with love for her.

"And you always do," he said earnestly, pulling her closer. "Y’could be wearing a paper bag and you'd still look pretty."

She blushed at his words, leaning into him. "You're too sweet, H."

They continued their stroll, their conversation peppered with laughter and affectionate glances,

February, 2024.

❛ Now, Sunday mornings, I just sleep in

It's like I buried my faith with you

I'm screamin' at a God I don't know if I believe in

'Cause I don't know what else I can do ❜

In the dimly lit room, Harry lay tangled in the sheets of what used to be their shared bed. The curtains were drawn tightly shut, blocking out the world beyond, as if he hadn't felt the warmth of the sun in ages.

His once vibrant eyes were hollow, filled with a pain that seemed to consume him.

Sunday mornings had lost their luster, their meaning stripped away along with the love he had lost. He no longer had the will to rise from bed, to face a world that felt empty and devoid of purpose without her by his side.

Staring at the photo of a toddler on his bedside table, being held by his darling wife was a painful reminder of what once was, whilst the toddler slept in there room next door, you were no where to be found.

Harry felt a wave of anguish wash over him. He had buried his faith along with her, his heart screaming out to a God he no longer knew if he believed in.

Tears welled up in his eyes, his chest constricting with the weight of his sorrow. He longed for her presence, for the warmth of her touch, but she was gone, leaving behind a void that seemed impossible to fill.

In the silence of the room, Harry found himself grappling with a pain so profound, he didn't know what else to do but scream into the void, hoping for some semblance of solace in a world that had turned its back on him.

Harry felt a wave of anguish wash over him. With trembling hands, he reached out and grabbed the photo of his wife, holding it close to his chest as tears streamed down his face.

"Why did y’take her?" he screamed into the empty room, his voice cracking with pain. "It should ‘ave been me!"

His cries echoed off the walls, a raw expression of the agony that consumed him. He clutched the photo tightly, as if holding onto it could somehow bring her back to him, could somehow ease the unbearable pain of her absence.

But she was gone, and Harry was left alone in a world that seemed intent on tearing him apart.

January, 2024.

❛ I'm still holdin' on to everything that's dead and gone

I don't wanna say goodbye, 'cause this one means forever ❜

"H," you whispered, your voice barely above a hoarse whisper, "I want to see her grow up. I want to see her graduate, get married, have children of her own."

You were referring to your and harrys freshly turned two year old daughter Grace Anne Styles, she was everything to the two of you, with her fathers curly hair and signature green eyes, her personality was all you, kind, caring and nurturing.

The sterile scent of the hospital mingled with the faint whir of machines monitoring your vital signs, creating an atmosphere heavy with uncertainty.

Six months ago, when you were diagnosed with breast cancer, Harry had clung to hope like a lifeline, determined to fight alongside you every step of the way. But as each day passed, that hope dwindled, replaced by a gnawing fear of what the future held.

You lay in the bed, your once vibrant spirit now dimmed by the relentless assault of the disease. Cancer had robbed you of your strength, leaving you fragile and frail. Your hair, once a cascade of curls that framed your face with warmth, had been replaced by a bald scalp, a stark reminder of the battle you fought with every breath.

Even your wedding rings, symbols of the love you and Harry shared, no longer fit your slender fingers, so he wore them on a chain around his neck, keeping them close to his heart.

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he reached out to take your hand in his.

"You will, pretty girl," he said softly, his voice filled with determination. "Y’going to get better, I know it."

But deep down, Harry couldn't shake the sinking feeling in his chest, the fear that he might lose you before you had the chance to see your dreams fulfilled.

So, as you drifted off to sleep, he sat by your bedside, his heart heavy with the weight of impending loss.

"I don't want to say goodbye," he whispered into the darkness, his voice barely above a whisper. "Because this one means forever."

He brushed a tear from his cheek as he watched over you, vowing to cherish every precious moment they had left together, unwilling to let go of the love that had defined their lives.

April, 2024.

❛ And now you're in the stars and six-feet's never felt so far

Here I am alone between the heavens and the embers❜

As Harry sat in the garden with Grace nestled in his lap, the night enveloped them in its quiet embrace. The stars twinkled overhead, their distant light casting a soft glow over the garden, while the faint crackle of embers from the nearby fire pit added to the ambiance. But despite the beauty of the night, Harry couldn't shake the overwhelming sense of loneliness that washed over him.

All day little Grace had asked about seeing mummy so who was harry to deny her of that?

"Look, Daddy! Look at all the stars!" Grace exclaimed, her small finger pointing up at the shimmering sky.

Harry forced a smile, his heart heavy with the weight of your absence.

"They're beautiful, aren't they, sweet girl?" he replied, his voice tinged with sadness.

"Yeah, but I still can't see Mommy," Grace said, her voice filled with longing. "When is she coming?"

“I’m not sure sweet girl,” Harry's heart shattered at her words, the pain of your loss echoing in his chest.

"I know you miss her, sweet girl," he said softly, pulling her closer. "I miss her too, but she’s always going to be up there isn’t she? up in the stars watching over me and you.”

"I want to see her," Grace insisted, her bottom lip trembling.

Harry's eyes welled up with tears as he looked down at his daughter, her innocent face filled with confusion and sorrow.

"I know, sweet girl," he murmured, his voice choked with emotion. "I wish I could bring her back for you."

"Why can't you, Daddy?" Grace asked, her voice tinged with frustration.

Harry's heart clenched at her words, the weight of his grief pressing down on him like a lead weight.

"Because she's in the stars now, sweetheart," he explained gently, his voice trembling.

Grace's eyes filled with tears as she buried her face in Harry's chest, her small body shaking with sobs.

"I want Mommy," she cried, her voice muffled against his shirt.

Harry held her tightly, his own tears mingling with hers as he struggled to find the words to comfort her.

"I know, sweet girl," he whispered, his voice choked with emotion. "I want mommy too."

February, 2024.

❛ Oh, it hurts so hard

For a million different reasons

You took the best of my heart

And left the rest in pieces ❜

As Harry sat in front of the photo of the two of you on your wedding day, the memories came flooding back like a tidal wave crashing over him.

The room felt empty, the silence deafening, as he clutched the half-drunk bottle of wine in his hands. With Grace sleeping at his mom's house for the night, he was left alone with his thoughts, the weight of your absence pressing down on him like a ton of bricks.

"Oh, it hurts so hard," Harry whispered, his voice barely above a hoarse whisper, as if afraid to disturb the stillness of the room.

He traced the outline of your face in the photo, his fingertips lingering on the curve of your smile, the sparkle in your eyes. The love they shared had been pure and unconditional, a bond that seemed unbreakable. But now, with you gone, Harry felt like a ship lost at sea, adrift in a vast ocean of loneliness and despair.

"You took the best of my heart," he murmured, his voice thick with tears,

And he didn’t want to admit that the rest was left in puzzle pieces.

Tears streamed down his face as he poured himself another glass of wine, the bitter taste doing little to dull the ache in his heart. He felt like he was suffocating, drowning in a sea of memories that threatened to swallow him whole.

"Why did y’have to go?" Harry whispered, his voice filled with anguish as he stared at the photo, as if willing it to provide him with answers. "We were supposed to grow old together, to watch Grace grow up, to share a lifetime of memories."

But the photo remained silent, a frozen moment in time that offered no solace, no comfort in the face of his pain. And as Harry sat alone in the darkness, he realized that no amount of wine could dull the ache of your absence, no words could bring you back to him.

"I miss you, pretty girl," he whispered, his voice breaking with emotion. "More than words can say."

June, 2024.

❛ Diggin' through your old birthday letters

A crumpled 20 still in the box

I don't think that I could ever find a way to spend it

Even if it's the last 20 that I've got, oh ❜

the weight of your absence felt heavier than ever. Today was Grace's third birthday, a day meant to be filled with joy and celebration, but instead, it served as a painful reminder of the life you should have been there to share.

With trembling hands, Harry sifted through the stack of cards, each one a precious memento of the love you poured into every aspect of your daughter's life. He ran his fingers over the familiar handwriting, his heart breaking with each heartfelt message penned by your hand.

But then, something caught his eye at the bottom of the box—a crumpled £20 note. Harry's breath caught in his throat as he unfolded the worn bill, his fingers trembling as he realized its significance. It was the last £20 that you had given him, tucked away as a surprise in one of Grace's birthday cards.

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he stared at the crumpled note, his heart aching with the weight of your absence. He had never been able to bring himself to spend it, holding onto it like a lifeline to the memories of the life they had shared together.

"Mommy got y’something special," Harry said softly, his voice thick with emotion, as he called Grace into the room. "This card is from her."

Grace's eyes widened with excitement as she took the card from Harry's outstretched hand, her fingers tracing the familiar handwriting.

"From Mommy?" she asked, her voice filled with wonder as Harry also handed her the crumpled £20.

"What are you going to spend the money on, sweet girl?" Harry asked gently, his voice tinged with sadness as he looked into his daughter's innocent eyes.

Grace's brows furrowed slightly as she considered her father's question. After a moment of thoughtful silence, she looked up at Harry with a determined expression.

"M’going to buy some happiness," she replied softly, her voice filled with sincerity. "So that you can be happy, Daddy."

Harry's breath caught in his throat as he gazed at his daughter, her words piercing through the veil of his grief like a ray of sunlight breaking through storm clouds. Tears welled up in his eyes as he reached out to pull Grace into a tight embrace.

"Oh, sweet girl," he whispered, his voice choked with emotion. "Y’already make me happier than I ever thought possible."

February, 2025.

❛ I'm still holdin' on to everything that's dead and gone

I don't wanna say goodbye, 'cause this one means forever

And now you're in the stars and six-feet's never felt so far

Here I am alone between the heavens and the embers ❜

The anniversary of your death was a cruel reminder of the void that now existed in his life, a void that could never be filled. He set down the bouquet of flowers he had brought, their vibrant colors stark against the somber backdrop of the cemetery.

"M’still holding on to everything that's dead and gone," Harry whispered, his voice barely above a hoarse whisper, as if afraid to disturb the silence of the graveyard.

Tears welled up in Harry's eyes as he sat down beside your grave, the cold earth beneath him a painful reminder of the finality of death. He traced the letters of your name etched into the headstone, his fingers trembling with grief.

"And now you're in the stars, and six-feet's never felt so far," he murmured, his voice thick with emotion. "Y’should be here, by m’side and we should be living life like we were supposed to be doing, I shouldn’t be visiting your gave, s’too unfair."

"I brought you y’favorite flowers," he said softly, his voice choked with emotion. "I hope you like them."

He paused, as if waiting for a response that would never come. The silence of the cemetery enveloped him like a shroud, amplifying the ache in his heart.

"I wish you were here," he whispered, his voice barely above a whisper. "I wish we could have just one more day together."

Tears streamed down Harry's face as he poured out his heart to you, his words a mix of sorrow and longing.

"Grace is growing up so fast," he continued, his voice trembling with emotion. "She's so much like you, y’know? Sometimes it feels like you're still here, watching over us."

He reached out to touch the cold marble of your headstone, his fingers tracing the letters of your name.

"I miss you every day," he confessed, his voice breaking with grief. "I don't know how to live without you."

As Harry spoke, memories flooded his mind, each one a bittersweet reminder of the love you had shared.

"Do y’remember our first date?" he asked softly, a wistful smile tugging at the corners of his lips. "I was so nervous, but you made me feel like everything was going to be okay."

He wiped away his tears, his heart heavy with the weight of your absence.

"I wish I could turn back time," he whispered, his voice filled with regret. "I wish I could tell y’how much I love you one more time."

And then, with a heavy heart, Harry pressed a kiss to your grave, his lips lingering on the cold stone as if seeking solace in its unforgiving surface.

"Goodbye, pretty girl," he whispered, his voice barely audible above the gentle rustle of the wind.

“Until we meet again.”

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kefiteria · 1 month

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FOR YOUR EYES ONLY.

A comfort letter from Scaramouche, just for you.

So, I've noticed you've been retreating into your mind more than usual lately. It's like you're doing a disappearing act even Houdini would envy. But hey, I get it. People are complicated creatures, and occasionally it feels safer to hide behind our thoughts than to face the chaos out there.

About this facade you've got going on. You know, the one where you're holding on to your inner child like it's a winning lottery ticket? It's almost comical how tightly you cling to it, as if someone's lurking around the corner waiting to snatch it away. Newsflash: nobody's taking it from you, dear.

Now, about those tears. I know, I know, crying is for the weak, right? Wrong. Even the toughest nuts crack sometimes. Take it from me, I've shed more tears than I care to admit, and yet here I am, still standing, still better as ever. You don't have to plaster on that smile 24/7, you know. Let those tears flow like a leaky faucet if you need to.

And speaking of tough times, let's talk about failure. It's not the end of the world, despite what your overactive brain might be telling you. Trust me, I've had my fair share of failures, and look at me now—still standing, scheming and myself.

So, when are you going to cut yourself some slack? Stop beating yourself up over things that are as out of your control as the weather. Tomorrow's just another day in the grand circus of life, and guess what? I'm your ringmaster, baby. You're not in this alone.

And those feelings you've been bottling up? Yeah, it's time to pop the cork and let 'em out. Trust me, it's like a pressure valve for the soul. Cry if you need to, scream into the void if you must. Just don't keep it all locked up inside. That's a recipe for disaster, believe me.

So, here's the deal: you're not alone in this. I've got your back, whether you're crying like a baby or plotting world domination (ugh just do it in moderation though). Just remember, it's okay to let your guard down once in a while. After all, even the sharpest swords need a little sharpening now and then.

Alright, let's wrap this up before I start growing a conscience or something equally absurd. Seriously, who knew pouring my heart out on paper could be so exhausting? I feel like I've been on a marathon run through a field of emotional landmines, and I'm not even wearing my running shoes.

But hey, if this little rant of mine manages to knock some sense into that stubborn head of yours, then I guess it's worth the carpal tunnel I'm bound to get from all this writing. Just promise me one thing: don't go making a habit out of this whole “feeling your feelings” nonsense. It's bad for my image.

So, there you have it. Consider this your one and only free pass to the sappy side of Scaramouche. Don't get used to it. Now go on, get out there and conquer the world, or cry yourself a river, whichever floats your boat. Just remember: you're not alone in this crazy circus we call life. I've got your back, whether you like it or not.

“It's okay, your world, and feelings are precious, so precious just like you are now.”

Fondly yours (don't make it a habit),

Scaramouche.

Other Version 🍨: Zhongli , Kazuha

#kefimenu #genshin fanfic #genshin imagines #scaramouche x y/n #scaramouche x you #scaramouche x reader #scaramouche #scara x reader #genshin scara #fluff #genshin impact #genshin oneshots #genshin x reader #comfort #Spotify

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amaramizuki666 · 1 year

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Shared sensation part.3

Danny couldnt feel his link anymore, his bond had completely dissolved when he died. Now even if him and his soulmate reconnected they could never revive their bond.

Danny still only felt numbness, well exept when he got electrocuted, hit with ghost hunting tech, or hurt with ecto plasma. Yeah not the best to feeling to only feel pain, but sometimes danny felt the pain was the only thing that kept him grounded.

It's been 3 years since he became phantom and 2 years since he became ghost king. And danny has learned a lot about being a ghost. Like 1) ghosts where suposed to still have their soulmate in death. The reson Danny aparntly didnt keep his bond was because he was rejected, at least that is what frostbite told him.

2) ghosts are very protective of their soul bonds and danny is no exception to this. He feels his core screaming for its other half every second of every day. Somedays the only thing keeping him going is his protection and space obsession. But still somedays it felt like he was going to go insane.

At one point he tried to order clockwork to tell him where his soulmate was so he could find him and try and convince him they could still be togeather even without the ties of their soul bond. He wanted to tell his soulmate he would do anything for them, he would protect him if he stayed with him no matter the cost.

"Danny?" Sam questions looking at him with concern "you good?". Danny blinked and nodded, they where currently in Danny's lair in the zone because after his parents found out about him being phantom they didnt take it well and let's say the GIW got involved.

"I'm fine sam, I just feel empty" danny says leaning back into his throne. "I understand danny, when the GIW blocked mine and tucker's bond it felt like my world was ripped away, it felt like my soul was in a void, I dont know how you are still sane" sam says sitting in her own throne to his right.

As a members of phantoms council she, tucker, jazz, even wes had their own thrones beside danny. "I'm not sure if I sould call myself sane, my morals have become very sewed to human standards" danny sighed. "Well you got rejected by your soulmate, died, got cloned by a frootloop, and got vivisected by your parents plus some. I'd say it's only fair your morals are fucked" sam states.

Danny chuckled "how is elle?" Sam inquired "oh shes good, in Rome right now" danny says happy to share what is going on with his daughter. Elle was made from his DNA, his ectoplasm, she is his daughter and one of the only reasons he hasn't gone off the deep end yet.

Danny held the goblet of ecto dejecto to his lips when he felt it. Cold and smooth metal in his hand. Danny froze "danny what's wrong?" Sam asked concerned. "Its cold" danny mumbled "what-" "sam I can feel the cold, the texter of the goblet, how-" danny questioned.

He stated at the goblet in his hand in amazement. Danny felt his core whirl in utter joy. "How?" Danny asked no one in particular.

Danny felt it. His bond was back strong and fresh, but that wasnt physicly possable. It goes aginst everything. His soulmate rejected him, he died whith the rejection, it is impossible for their bond to reform. So how is his bond back.

You know what. Danny doesn't care how. He has his other half again. And by the ancients he refuses to loose them again. "Sam tell the others I'm taking momentary leave. You and tucker will be in charge while I'm gone" danny orders and she nods without questions.

Danny rose from his throne. He will fine his soulmate. And nothing was going to stop him.

part. 2

Part 4

#writing prompt #writing #danny phantom #dialogue prompt #danny fenton #dc x dp #dc #dc comics #batfam #my writing #sam manson #dead tired #brain dead #danny x tim #tim drake #angst #soulmates

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kengan-daddies · 8 months

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The Life of a Family Boyfriend Yujiro Hanma x Strong Girlfriend!! Reader

I Know, but I Don't Care Boyfriend! Yujiro Hanma x Strong! Girlfriend! Reader

Anime : Baki : Son of Ogre Characters : Yujiro Hanma Warning : None, Fluff, Family Dynamics

The Life of a Family Boyfriend Yujiro Hanma x Strong Girlfriend!! Reader

Baki sat Indian style on the large, square comfort cushion, his arms resting on his knees as he watched the scene before him, a bewildered look upon his face, with a small smile. He didn't know what to think, or how to express how he felt... He felt giddy, extremely happy, and confused. He was staring at the scene before him, his thoughts racing a hundred miles an hour.

'Okay... So you might be wondering, "Baki... What the heck is going on?" Well... let's start from the beginning because even I can't believe it right now.... So, it was a while back when you first appeared out of nowhere one day, you're a good friend, but you had so much love in your heart for me... Not romantically... But more like nurturing... Motherly in a way. You're strong, like crazy strong. I couldn't believe your power... Your raw strength, and all from that dainty little body of yours too.

But like always, It didn't take long for my old man to learn of you, even though I did try to keep you a secret from him for as long as possible, my reasoning?... Simply because I didn't want to share you... with anyone.... Now I sound like a crazy person, but it's nothing weird I promise.

You're an older woman, you're older than me by about 20-something years, but you're an amazing friend, someone who I could talk to, someone who didn't know who I was... at least I thought you didn't know who I was... You acted like you didn't and if you did, you didn't seem to care. You always came by to help me out. You cooked for me, you cleaned for me, you talked to me, you laughed with me, and you even helped train me, you did everything that was like a good friend but also like a mother... I... never experienced that and I loved it.

But then my father learned of you, and I'm still not sure how. He just showed up on my doorstep one day, claiming "I can sense the presence of a strong warrior, and it's been lingering around you, so what you got going on, kid?"... God I hated him... Always in my business... But anyways, you came on out and you confronted him, and you weren't scared to speak your mind to him... It was funny... I've never actually seen anyone talk like that to my dad... But he didn't take it too well, he never did.

He went to attack you, and honestly... I damn near felt my whole world shatter... For the first time, in my entire life... I felt whole... I felt complete with you by my side... You were filling up the void in my heart that I never really realized was there... A mother's love... Tender hugs and head rubs... Always asking how I was doing... Always coming home after school to a warm cooked meal, clothes folded and home clean... I was loving it... I felt my dream shatter the moment he went to attack you.

I wanted to intervene, I wanted to cry and scream... I wanted to try and kill him, but I was shocked when you just stood there, you took his punch, straight to your face... it was so cool... Then you pulled a bad ass move. "You call that a punch? If that's the best you got, then the others you've been fighting have just been pathetically weak... Let me show you, what a real punch looks like." ... And just like that, you cocked your arm back, and you threw a punch into his face, making him fly.

I almost couldn't breathe... You punched The Ogre... and you made him fly... Nobody has ever before done that... No one... After that... He seemed to be attracted to you or something... See, first he vanished, for like a few months... Nothing too weird honestly... life went back to normal... and then he just showed up again, demanding that you become his woman and that you will train him to become stronger... The audacity of that man... And you agreed!! I wanted to cry man, it was so unfair. But you had one thing you wanted to bring with you... Me.

You wanted to bring me with you, to live at my Dad's place... Did you even realize what you were asking?... Of course you did, that's why we're in this situation now... But I can't say that I hate it... I always wanted to live as a family with my old man... Eating breakfast, lunch, and dinner with him... Sitting on the couch watching TV together... Having small harmless arguments... It's been like a dream... And all the while, you played as Mom, Dad was Dad, and I was the Son... A perfect family... Aside from the fact that we're all fighters and the Mom is the strongest and the Dad is the second strongest and I'm the third... So maybe not too normal... But eh it works for me.

You've been training us, me and Dad... But Dad's training is way harder. You'd make us do handstands on our thumbs for days. For me it was 1 - 2 days and for Dad, it was 3 - 6 days, his training was way tougher, I was a little upset about it at first, but you had a pretty good reason as to why you did what you did. "Baki, you have school, so you can't be put under so much strain, you're pretty much the baby of the house, and the baby always gets spoiled, so take it or leave it."... Honestly I wanted to leave it, but then you said the best thing I could've ever heard. "And you're also my favorite, so I give you special treatment."... SCORE!!! I WAS THE FAV!!! Take that old man!!

So now, that leads us to right now... Sitting in the living area of Dad's big-ass mansion... Mom just got out of the shower...Oh, and I call you mom now... mentally though, I haven't gotten the confidence to say it out loud yet, but I show it with my actions... Anyways, you threw him the bottle of lotion, because apparently you always allowed him to put lotion on you... I didn't need that mental picture...But this was hilarious.' Baki thought as he watched the scene unfold before him.

The wide glass coffee table separated him from both you and Yujiro, You were standing in front of the entryway, an unimpressed stare in your eyes as you stared down Yujiro who was holding the Bottle of lotion that you just threw at him. Your silky robe stops mid-thigh tied securely around your waist, your arms crossed. Yujiro was wearing what he normally wore, a smug smirk on his face as his eyes gleamed with perverted mischief, his hand shifting ever so slightly, making the bottle rotate in his palm.

"No." You simply answered. Yujiro's smirk fell and a frown replaced it instead. "Why the fuck not!? I've done everything you've told me to do, I've been like your fucking dog for the past 9 months, you say I'm your man, yet ya won't even let me put fucking lotion on ya!!" He shouted. You kept the same unimpressed stare as you spoke in an even tone. "That's right because you haven't earned the privilege to do so yet." You responded.

Yujiro bared his teeth, the bottle now in a slowly tightening grip, his other hand balled as he took a single step towards you as he announced his displeasure. "PRIVILAGE!? I've been working my ass off for you, and you still have the audacity to tell me that I've yet to earn the right to put lotion on your damn body!?" He yelled. You didn't react to his anger, your unimpressed stare making him angrier as veins bulged along his arms and neck.

"You've yet to meet my full expectation, Yujiro Hanma, You're still too weak for me to allow you to just freely caress my body like a lover just yet. It's true, that I've recognized you as my man, but you have yet to be recognized as a lover." You explained. His eyes harden into a nasty glare, the lust they once had faded into anger, his grip on the bottle tightening making it bend. "GRRRRR!! WHY YOU-!!" He spoke as he prepared to take another step, but your voice stopped him.

The unimpressed look on your face shifts into a warning glare. "May there be a god in heaven that gives a damn about you, if you bust my lotion bottle I'll cave your fucking skull in." You threatened. His eyes slightly widen before he relaxes some. "Mmmm... Hmph." He scoffed as he gave a small pout. Your warning glare relaxed back into the unimpressed stare, as you uncrossed your arms, placing them on your hips instead, your eyes sizing him up before you gave an approving nod.

"..... Better, I'll admit, that you've gotten stronger, every time you break past your limit barrier, you've gained more access to my body. First the feet, then the calves, then the thighs, and now the back." You said, your head slightly tilting to the side as you went over all the body parts he's now allowed to lotion. He gave a pleased smirk as his eyes gleamed in pride and mischief. "Heh, and pretty soon it'll be the front." He chuckled as his eyes traced over your form.

You seemed unbothered by his stare. "Yes, the front of the foot that is." You said. His pleased stare quickly shifted into a look of rage as he growled. "WHAT!? NOW THAT'S FUCKING BULLSHIT!!!" He shouted, Baki cheeks puffed up as he tried to hold in his laughter, a small bit of snot coming out from how hard he snorted as he sat up rigidly straight. If he was heard, he'd never know as you both continued to stare each other down, not even acknowledging him.

You snatched your head off from Yujiro. "Hmph, it'll take longer than what you dream of before I'd ever just let you caress me in any kind of way." You said in a conceded voice. Yujiro's harsh glare softened, the veins remaining as he tried to look on the bright side. "Well, at least I get to lotion your back." he said. You looked over at him, a gleam in your eyes as your face stayed unreadable. "Yes, but no ass." You simply said. Baki's body shook from how hard he tried to contain his laughter. 'Damn... She's a literal savage.' He thought as his eyes bounced to his father.

Yujiro's face contorted into pure rage, his hair waving about as he shook with anger. "NOW I KNOW YOU'RE FUCKING WITH ME!!! WHY THE FUCK NOT!?" He shouted angrily, his grip back tight on the bottle once more. Your unreadable face turned into a slight frown but the gleam in your eyes remained. 'This bitch.' Yujiro thought. "Because I refuse to allow you to caress me like a lover until you've proven your worth. I'd never let a man weaker than me to ever lay a finger on me in any kind of way, which also goes for you too."

You explained, an arrogant look on your face. Yujiro growled in rage at your words, his grip tightening on the bottle, making it bend and creak. 'THIS FUCKING BITCH!! WHO THE FUCK DOES SHE THINK SHE IS!!!' He thought. Your angered yet calm voice caught his attention. "If you bust my lotion bottle, I'll rip your fucking jaw off, shove it up your ass, wait for you to shit it out, and then I'll reattach it to your fucking face." You promised as you glared at him.

He growled a little longer before he calmed himself, relaxing himself as he calmed, his hair laying back down as he somewhat calmed down. ".....Fine... You sure make one hell of a hard bargain, woman." He said calmly. You scoffed lightly as you looked him up and down, almost like you were judging him. "Humph, it's only fair, right? You wouldn't give a weak woman the time of day, so why should I give a weak man mine? Besides, the only reason why I even allowed you to apply lotion to even the bottom of my foot to begin with, was because I saw potential in your ever-growing strength, and to serve as motivation." You explained.

Yujiro gave you a perplexed stare. "Huh? Motivation? I already have enough of that." He said. You nodded in agreement. "True, to be the true strongest, yes, but to get what you truly want, no." You said. He stared at you, thinking over your words, Baki also stared on in wonder. You crossed your arms, the unimpressed look coming back across your face as you explained.

"I am your true motivation, granting you access to a new part of my body, every time your strength improves serves as motivation. I am what you really want, and to see that you're getting closer and closer is enough to motivate you. You can't see how strong you've gotten against me, but you can see it on my body. The more granted access, the further along you've come along." You said, your legs shifting some, drawing his attention to them. The smooth, recently shaven skin gleamed under the light.

His eyes focused on your legs as he spoke, his eyes slowly trailing up as he spoke. "I see, so you're like a tracer of sorts, that's pretty damn smart." He said. 'It really is, that's Mom for you though.' Baki thought as he listened to you both speak. You rolled your eyes, but you swelled with pride. "But of course it is, but I can promise you now, you're still too weak to even get a pinch on the top of my big toe." You said. Yujiro smirked, a vein or two bulged as he tried to keep his grip on the bottle loose. "Real bitch move, ya know?" He said. You shrugged, uncaring as you turned your back to him, your hips swaying back and forth as you walked towards the entryway.

You stopped at the frame, your fingers holding onto it as you looked over your shoulder at him. "I know, and I don't care, now get to lathering my back, my skin is drying and I refuse to be flaky." You said, your eyes gleaming sensually as you walked past the frame. Yujiro grunted in displeasure as he rolled his neck, he sighed. "Yeah yeah." He said as he followed you out. Baki remained sitting there, a thoughtful look on his face.

'A tracer huh?... A way to show his progress... So Dad has been getting stronger than... it's hard to tell when he fights against Mom... I can't see much of an improvement aside from his speed and stamina increasing, but that's about it... I need to convince her to up my training... I can't get left behind... I've been slacking... Playing the game... Playing 'Son'... I need to get back into the game.

He thought in determination as he stood up and walked towards the entryway, stopping before he left the room, a smile broke out on his face. 'Damn... I wonder how long Dad is gonna get blue-balled before he is deemed worthy?... This is better than TV.' He thought giddily as he left the living area.

#baki #baki son of ogre #baki the grappler #baki yujiro #baki son of ogre yujiro hanma #yujiro hanma #yujiro #hanma #yujiro x y/n #yujiro x reader #yujiro hanma x reader #yujiro hanma x y/n #hanma x reader #hanma x y/n

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empressofthesunslittlecorner · 2 months

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Let's talk about Zutara

WARNING NOT KATAANG AND MAIKO FRIENDLY

CONTINUE WITH PRECAUTION

I thought I should finally use this second blog of mine for the reason I made it.

To scream into the void and find mutals.

So let's talk about one Ship which people to this day fight over.

The fanon ship (at it pains me to write this) made out of Zuko and Katara from Avatar the Last Airbender aka. Zutara.

I read a lot of analyses, arguments and so on about this ship.

It probably all has been said about Zutara, but since I'm writing an AangXOC story which will include Zutara, I felt like I should give my stance on it.

Back when Avatar first aired in the country I lived in the time I was like 11-12 years old.

I had an instant crush on Aang since he was so funny, kind and gentle.

I never saw Aang's crush on Katara as a problem, because it always seemed to me, till season 3, that Katara was just motherly to Aang.

Giving a friend a cheek kiss in thanks doesn't automatically mean that you like-like them.

At this time I only really shipped Sokka and Yue and cried my eyes out how it ended.

And then the famous scene from book 2 in the crystal catacombs under Ba Sing Se happened.

Short recap, in that season Zuko goes through a lot of chances and I root for, wishing him the best.

Now back to the scene, I said.

The scene turned me into a Zutara shipper in one instant.

Zuko and Katara opening up to each other, sharing their traumas and feelings about the Fire Nation, Katara offering to heal his scare...it was poetic cinema.

I was shivering all over and was like kiss, kiss, kiss!

Let's not forget that before this scene I didn't even see them as a potential couple...but this scene, this beautiful moment they shared with each other, opened my eyes.

I was like, yeah this is it, this is something one should want from a partner. Mutual understanding.

Then Zuko decided to betray Katara for a chance to go home and I cried right there with our favourite waterbender.

I felt also betrayed.

The scene they shared made me feel things, which I experienced as a young girl for the first time, I felt the connection between Zuko and Katara like it was my own.

I was Katara at this moment and couldn't believe that the boy who opened up to me, who understood what it was like to have their mother taken away from the Fire Nation, who said that he wanted to change, that he turned his back on me.

Didn't I/Katara mean nothing to him?

Didn't he feel how special our/their moment was?

I was devasted.

When Zuko then joined the Gaang in the middle of season 3 I could understand Katara's anger towards him.

Katara and I trusted him first and he betrayed our trust.

We had a right to be angry.

As the Southern Raiders came on, as I saw how flawlessly they worked as a team, I felt my own heart heal.

I swerve to this day, that I thought they would kiss at the end of the episode, but we got a hug.

However, this hug, made me feel all giddy and mushy inside.

I felt it was something special.

Maybe even more than a kiss.

It was a huge of forgiveness and the start of a new bond.

And then the last episode comes on.

Zuko sacrificed himself to save Katara from Azula lighting, she healed him then...I thought, yes this is it, now comes the kiss...but nothing.

Then suddenly Zuko is back together with Mai and I was like WTF?!

And Aang and Katara share this really intense kiss at the end.

I was literally like:

youtube

It came out of nowhere for me.

That Aang wasn't over his crush on Katara we all know, but when did Katara decide she liked Aang?

When did this realisation happen, when in the Ember Island Player, which was like a few days before Sozin's Comet Katara made clear that she didn't want to have a romance or get kissed by Aang, which he didn't respect.

Did he ever actually apologise for the unwanted kiss? I don't think so.

Remember I had a crush on Aang, but through the seasons I became a Zutara Shipper and literally felt all their moments like they were my own.

I was Katara and Aang wasn't on my radar anymore.

I really doubted my interpretation skill, did all these lovely, mushy, heartful moments have been really romantic or did I project?

I felt like Zuko and Katara had broken up with me.

Yeah, so much inpact had their "friendly" moments at me!

To this day, the hug Katara and Zuko shared on the Southern Raiders is one of the most lovely moments of any of my ships.

Not even kissing made me feel, what this hug made me feel.

Think about how powerful this is!

If Zutara had kissed, I would have probably passed out or cried like a baby in happiness.

I don't know and I will never know since it's a fanon ship.

Uurgh.

Anyway, years passed and as I mention before I read a lot of analysis and so on.

What shocked me most was that Byrke originally planned to have Zuko and Katara together but then changed their minds.

It did reassure me, how I wasn't imagining things between them, however reading then how the Souther Raider Episode changed a lot of times because Bryke found it too shippy, tells you a lot.

They wanted to make Kataang canon and better, than the natural flow Zutara had going on.

I want to repeat again, a HUG was MORE ROMANTIC and INTENSE than the crappy kiss Kataang shared.

Like what?!

How is this possible?

Well, yeah, if you don't force things and actually make people interact in a wholesome way it can be.

Zuko and Katara felt never forced because they just clicked. They were different, but the same in many things, that it was so natural to understand the other.

Aang and Katara felt always more like a mother-and-son duo, than real lovers.

And Maiko was kinda lame too.

Sorry.

I have this theory they just wanted to pair Zuko with a Fire Nation girl and be done with it.

I don't know why they chose Mai when it could have been worked with Ty Lee too, if it was only to pair Zuko with someone who doesn't understand him or doesn't want to try.

Excuse me, maybe Ty Lee would have been better since she seemed to care for her friends, in contrast to Mai who just tried her hardest to be goth and hate everything.

Sorry.

What I'm trying to say with this rant?

I think, as someone who had liked Aang and then felt more connected to Zuko and Katara, I can clearly say that if Katara had been a real girl and not a fictional character controlled by men, she would be together with Zuko.

Why would I/Katara choose someone who I need to mother, who is younger than me, who can't relate to me, if there is an older handsome boy who is kinda dorky and awkward and tries his best, understands my feelings and helps me to parent the Gaang?

Yeah, no, Katara would have smooched Zuko if she had been a real girl.

Now, who of you who knows me, can say, but Empress some of your OCs are older than their canon partner, how can you say that Kataang can't work if you do this in your stories?!

I want to make clear I don't have general a problem if the girl is older than the guy or taller.

It's just that their supposed age gap is when they are together makes it creepy.

Look at an example.

My parents have a three-year age gap.

Nothing much.

They are both in their 60, mid 60, so it's not weird.

They are in the same mature stage in life and understand the struggles of the other.

Now think if my parents meet at 12 and 15.

My dad is the older one.

Are you going to say with a straight face that it wouldn't have been creepy if my parents started to date at this age?

What does a teenager want with a pre-puperty child?

Also, they live in completely different worlds, how can they relate to each other?

The same goes for Katara and Aang, what does a 14-year-old want from a 12-year-old?

I bet if it was the other way around, we would all give Aang shit for preying on a 12-year-old girl.

The gender shouldn't decide if we find a couple creepy or not, even if it's so sadly.

What I want to say, Kataang would have worked better if let's say season 3 ended with no pairing, just all being friends and happy and then in the comics when they age, when Katara is 22 and Aang is 20 they got together.

They would have matured, been on the same level, probably dated other people and had experience.

It would have been okay.

Even if I still think Zutara is superior in anything.

Anyway, I hope I could explain myself and no hate to the canon ships and their shippers.

Ship and let ship.

I just wanted to explain my reason why I will be always a Zutara Shipper and don't reconsider the ending of Avatar as the end and Legend of Korra.

I will forever be Team-Season-Four-Where-Aang-Finds-Hiding-Airbenders-And-Falls-in-Love-With-A-Airbender Girl-His-Age-And-Zuko-And-Katara-Marry-Eachother-And-Katara-Becomes-The-Most-Beloved-And-Badass-Fire Lady-In-History!

And they find also Zuko mom ^^

So for now this is it for me.

If you want my take on an Aang and OC story, where Zutara will be canon, go to my other Tumblr profile empressofthesunwriter and read Yin and Yang.

Here is the link to the Index

I wish you all a nice day/night!

Till next time!

#avatar the last airbender #atla #zutara #zutarian #zuko #prince zuko #atla zuko #katara #atla katara #atla zutara #zuko x katara #katara x zuko #Youtube #alta zutara

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venturelovebot · 7 days

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A/N: I felt bad yesterday so I did some comfort writing to make up for it! I know it's not everyone's cup of tea but maybe someone else will find comfort in it like I did. （◞‿◟ ;）

Premise: Reader has a massive sensory meltdown. Luckily caregiver!Venture is there to comfort them! ( ´͈ ◡ `͈ ) Use of feminine nicknames for reader, but otherwise completely gender neutral!

Warnings: Mentions of self harm (not graphic), vent age regression, lots of angst in the beginning!

"I'm going to bed early tonight." You call from the bedroom doorway. "Goodnight."

"Okay! Chat, say goodnight!" Sloan replies.

You watch as the side of the television screen erupts into a wave of cheerful emotes and various forms of "goodnight". A wave of exhaustion hits you once again and you make your way to your shared bed before collapsing onto the cool sheets below. Your body and brain feel like they're on fire from the endless sensory overload. Everything was entirely too overwhelming to deal with, and before you knew it, you were crying into the blanket as you succumb once more to the fiery abyss of sensory hell.

"Oh God, just let today end already." You murmur. "I can't take it anymore."

You wrap yourself up underneath the sheets in the fetal position as more hot tears spill onto your pillow this time. All sense of rationality had been ejected into the void– there was nothing you could say or do to yourself to prevent the oncoming meltdown today has brought upon you. You groan in discomfort as your skin begins to feel uncomfortable on your own body, wishing you could just unzip it and crawl out and hide away forever. Your fingernails desperately claw into your agitated flesh as your condition continues to spiral out of your control.

You can still hear your beloved laughing and making jokes in the living room. A sadness strikes your heart, wishing you could be next to them laughing and having fun like you usually are.

"Ugh!" You grab the other pillow and wail into it like no tomorrow.

"Stupid! So fucking stupid! Stop feeling bad already!" You grumble in a soft voice.

You're still careful not to make any loud noises though. The last thing you wanted to do is draw any attention to yourself. Although, you could hardly contain wanting to yell at the top of your lungs for it all to go away. Thousands of angry thoughts begin flying through your mind like a swarm of agitated wasps. You instantly cover your head with the beaten up pillow and scream as loud as you can before tossing it in a random direction, knocking something off the nightstand by accident. Whatever it was, it falls to the ground with a loud crashing sound and for a moment you're frozen in fear.

"What was that?" Sloan calls out from the living room. "Are you alright?"

"It was an accident! Sorry!" You answer in the most sober voice you could manage.

It wasn't technically a lie– you really didn't mean to break it– but now you feel the guilt and anxiety flooding your system right alongside the frustration and sensory overload that caused a toxic concoction of emotions running wild through your nervous system. More tears formed in the corner of your eyes as you peek over at the broken object. It was a beautiful hand made glass statue you had been gifted for your birthday from your family.

"Oh God, why me?" You whine as you pick up all the broken pieces with blurred vision.

One of the pieces slides across your finger and accidentally penetrates your skin, causing you to drop everything from the pain. Luckily none of it had splintered off, but you're still left with a particularly nasty cut that was starting to ooze blood. Inside your head you were thinking that you clearly did something to deserve this, but you sincerely wish you could remember what it was. You wipe away more tears with your blood stained hand before finally standing up and making your way into the bathroom.

The first thing you do is wipe the blood off your face and hand before tending to the wound on your finger, all the while trying to ignore the bright stripes across your arms created earlier by your fingernails. You splash your red, puffy face with a little bit of water to help you calm down, but the water droplets dripping down your irritated arms only made everything worse. You ball up a towel and viciously wipe yourself dry before tossing it haphazardly towards the towel rack you had gotten it from. It lands half way onto the floor, forgotten.

You hear a soft knock on the door, but it sounded more like nails on a chalkboard at this point. Uncomfortable chills run down your spine.

"Is everything okay, mi tesoro?" Your beloved asks from outside the bathroom.

"Yeah. I'm fine." You respond bluntly.

They slowly open the door to check on you. Guilt stops you from looking directly at them.

"You're bleeding! Did you hurt yourself?" They point out orb of blood that reformed on the tip of your finger.

"Not on purpose..." You explain. "I was just trying to pick up what I broke..."

They clean off your finger with soap and water before applying a little medicine to help it heal, wrapping it all up with a cutesy printed bandaid. Their touch feels pleasant on your scratchy skin.

"All better!" They smile at you.

You wish.

Their smile faded again. "What's wrong, cariño? What happened? Did I upset you?"

Your heart leaps in a panic. "No! Of course not! I'm just... not feeling well today..." Your vision blurs once more trying to explain yourself.

Sloan's arms wrap lovingly around you and pull you in for a comforting hug. You can feel yourself starting to slip as the tears arrive once again– falling with no warning, sobs escaping your stressed throat as your meltdown hits you full force. A soothing hand rubs your back in gentle, repetitive motions and you reach to throw your arms around their neck in a frantic attempt to console yourself.

"It's okay now, mi pollita. Let's get you back to bed, yeah?"

They steadily guide you from the bathroom and back into the bedroom where you spy the broken gift inside a cardboard box with the pillow placed back in the proper place on the bed. You collapse again onto the mattress and they lay down to join you, grabbing your hand and placing delicate kisses to your knuckles.

"You can cry as much as you need to, chiquitita. I'm right here." Their voice is so soft and genuine, like the embodiment of safety itself.

You move over to lay by their side and they protectively wrap an arm around you to hold you close. You bury your face into the fabric of their shirt as you weep out all the awful emotions built up inside from the aftermath of today. Tiredness weighs heavily on your eyelids with every tear shed, barely able to hold yourself together enough to form a sentence at this point.

"I'm sorry I wasn't able to help you earlier, but I'm here now." They reassure you. "Nothing can hurt you anymore. I promise."

"Not your fault..." You mutter in response.

You sniffle as the metaphorical faucet of your eyes slowly turns into trickles, before stopping completely all together.

"Feeling any better?" They ask.

"Head... hurts..." You mumble.

"I'll go get you some aspirin." They lean down to place a kiss to your forehead and head towards the kitchen.

All is finally quiet: mind, body and heart.

"Here." They hand you a small pill and a cold cup of water in a plastic Sanrio bottle.

You drink it without hesitance. The water is refreshing to your fatigued throat and body. Every last drop makes into your mouth before you set the now empty container on the table side. Their hand reaches for the top of your head and ruffles your fluffy hair affectionately, causing you to giggle in response.

"There you are! My happy bebé!" They grin.

They reach down to nuzzle you before peppering your face in kisses, coaxing more gentle laughter out from your chest.

"I'm glad you're feeling a little better." They add.

You open your mouth to reply but all that escapes is a yawn.

"Someone's tired!" They playfully tease you, tugging back the covers for you to lay down inside of. "You've had a long day. Get some rest, mi amorcito."

As soon as your head hits the pillow and close your eyes, you're already half way asleep. You feel them tuck something fluffy and soft in with you before placing one more kiss to your forehead. Out of the corner of your vision you see stars and planets lighting up the wall as they turned on your favorite star projector for extra coziness.

"Buenas noches, dulces sueños, mi bebé. I'll be in bed soon." They promise.

#i almost didn't want to publish this because i was afraid of backlash but... we ball #sloan cameron #sloane cameron #venture x reader #venture x you #overwatch x reader #overwatch x you #venture #venture overwatch #venture ow2 #overwatch fanfiction

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pretz3l-log1c · 1 year

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Recently I saw a post explaining cats vocalize around humans as a way to social signal. That Humans do a lot of social signaling as well. That's why people talk about the weather or will grumble about the long wait in line to the person near them. Or why people will ask 'Hey, how's it going?' and just want a 'good. Thanks for asking. And you?'. It's all about recognizing you're part of a group.

Then I saw, and reblogged a post, explaining that compared to most marketing stats, fanfiction is exceptionally above engagment averages at even 10% kudos per hits.

Yet, fanfic writers often feel as if they're screaming into a void and that engagement is down/dwindling/dying/etc.

So now I'm wondering if these two things are connected.

I think the problem fanfic writers are currently facing is a matter of community. In a way participating in fandom by writing fanfic is a way of social signalling. It is a way for the writer to go "I like this thing, don't you like this thing too?"

It's like the writer is calling out hello only for 90 out of 100 people to blankly stare at them. 10 out of 100 will wave hello. Only a few out of 100 will actually say something back.

Is it any wonder writers feel like they're screaming into a void? At least when you scream into a void you don't know how many people heard you, you just hear who screams back. It has to hurt mentally to put your heart out there and feel like it's being ignored.

I think about how forums of the early internet age have largely died off. How Tumblr engagement has ebbed over the years. How fanfiction has become some people's main means of engaging in fandom because it's 'free'.*

So I genuinely think the problem here is fanfic writers want community and are trying to gain that through fanfic. And they feel largely ignored/abandoned/snubbed because they're not recieving that engagement.

So my advice to writers:

turn off/hide/ignore your fanfic stats. If email alerts for kudos and/or comments spark joy then keep them. Otherwise turn those off as well.

create and/or join fandom focused discords. Find people you connect with and build a community that way.

put an author's note on your works that you like to engage with readers. That you want their thoughts, feelings opinions, etc. on your writing. Provide links for people to to chat you up on whatever social media site you prefer.

My advice to readers:

if you're going to talk to fandom friends about a fic you read, maybe leave a comment as simple as 'I love this and I'm going to share it with everyone I know.'

if you find a fic you regularly re-read or an author you loyally follow, let the author know that.

if a fic had a huge impact on you, let the writer know that.

Readers please note: I am not saying leave kudos more often, I am not saying comment on every fic. I am saying, in short, if it moves you then let the author know you were moved.

* yes I know fanworks are a labor of love/hobby and not actually free for the creator at least in time/effort. I write fanfic. I'm just saying it doesn't typically cost money to consume.

#pretzel rambles #writing #fanfiction #fanart #I do make an effort to leave comments on RB art for example #anything from 'oh the color scheeme so pretty' to 'a short fanfic drabble #i don't always succeed #and I think that's ok because ai am still RBing the art so other may see it #and maybe someone else will have the spoons to comment #I think we talk a lot about the spoon theory here on tumblr #so I think it's important to think reading fanfic cost 1 spoon but engaging with it cost 2 and most people don't have a 2nd spoon to spare #i think we need to kinder to ourselves about our expectations for how 'successful' a fanfic is #also kinder to readers and our expectations of them

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hazza-bear-care · 8 months

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What Happened Part 2

Dedicated to @talesofadragon and the others who loved the first part.

Jason gets a taste of his own medicine and Bucky fills Steve in on a secret.

DBF!Bucky X Fem!Rogers!Reader

Warnings: Mentions of cheating, swearing, mentions of miscarriage, manipulation, and mentions of abuse. let me know if I missed anything!

A/N: This is a long one! Strap yourselves in, and enjoy!

~~~~~~~~

Are you still coming over baby? I miss you ;)

Accompanying the text was a lewd picture, a scantily clad brunette kneeling on her bed, legs spread and enticing. Jason groaned, rubbing his hand over his face as he contemplated her request. For the moment, he ignored the text while he got dressed, ready to approach Y/N and ask if she was ready to apologize to him for invading his privacy. However, when Jason came back into the living room, Y/N wasn't there. Instead, their pictures were all over the floor, glass and wood splintered around them. Muffling his anger, he spun around to see where Y/N was hiding.

"Y/N! You better come out and clean this shit up!" Silence echoed around him. With a growl, Jason tore through the apartment, ripping door off the hinges, clothes out of closets, but Y/N wasn't in the apartment. As Jason stomped to the door and grabbed his car keys, he noticed Y/N's shoes were still in their place by the door. She couldn't get very far without her shoes, especially in the pouring rain, so Jason decided to knock on every door in the complex to see if his back-stabbing girlfriend was hiding from him somewhere else. Y/N didn't have friends, all of them abandoning her once she moved in with Jason. She worked from home, so she never really had a reason to leave the house, just like she never had an excuse to not clean the house while Jason was out.

Every apartment was void of Y/N, the homeowners upset due to the interruption of their sleep. One young family, a husband, wife, and screaming newborn offered to call Y/N seeing as she offered to babysit one day, but Jason waved them off, mumbling something about her phone being dead. With hopes of finding her given, the slightly angry father closed and locked the door as Jason tore down the hallway and flying down the stairs. He jumped into his car and peeled out of the parking lot, heading towards the one place she had left to go: her father's house.

20 minutes later, Jason was once again pounding on a door, but this time it was Steve's.

"Jason? Do you have any idea what time it is?" Steve asked, voice slurring with sleep.

"Yeah, yeah. Where's Y/N?" Jason asked, pushing past Steve and stomping up to the guest room he and Y/N had shared whenever they came to visit. Jason looked under the bed, in the closet, and behind the shower curtain, Y/N still not easily found.

"What do you mean 'Where's Y/N'? She should be home asleep." Steve countered, following Jason as he tore through the house.

"She's not." Jason muttered, once again pushing past Steve to check the other rooms in the house. He left a trail of destruction behind him as he flew through Steve's house.

"God Dammit, where are you hiding her?!" Jason yelled, grabbing Steve by his shirt collar and slamming him up against the wall, anger dripping from him in thick ropes.

"I'm not hiding her anywhere! What is going on?" Steve argued back, pushing Jason off of him as he spoke.

"Nothing. We had a fight and she left." Jason spat, deciding to go back downstairs.

"Could she be staying with a friend?" Steve asked, discreetly pulling out his phone and sending a text to Y/N, anxiously waiting for the 'delivered' note to pop up, but it never did.

"You and I both know Y/N doesn't have any friends, Steven. Call me when you hear from her." Jason ordered, slamming the door behind him and speeding off towards that sexy brunette that was waiting for him across town.

As he watched Jason speed off down the street, Steve called the only other person Y/N knew in town; Bucky.

As Y/N slept soundly in Bucky's arms, thoughts were swimming in his head. Thoughts about Jason and how much that little punk deserved what was coming for him. Thoughts about Steve, his best friend and father to the dream girl currently laying in his bed; the same girl he vowed he'd never touch no matter how much he wanted to. And of course, thoughts about Y/N, the red flags she'd ignored about Jason, and the consequences they brought.

His phone vibrating on his nightstand was the only thing able to break him out of his trance. He placed a gentle kiss to Y/N's temple before slipping out of her grasp and grabbing his phone, leaving the room to not disturb her peaceful slumber.

"Hey, Steve. What's up?" Bucky asked as he pressed his phone to his ear, prying his voice came out even and calm.

"Where's Y/N?" Steve barked back, anger lacing his voice.

"Why are you asking?" Steve sighed on the other end of the phone, and Bucky could just picture his best friend pinching the bridge of his nose in frustration.

"Jason stopped by. Considering the fact that it was pouring rain, three am, and that he didn't know where his girlfriend, my DAUGHTER, was, I decided I needed to call you. So, where's Y/N?" Steve explained, once again asking for the location of his daughter.

"Before I answer you, is Jason still there?" Fear prickled the back of Bucky's neck, his breath quickening as he awaited Steve's response.

"No, James, he's not still here. He left almost as soon as I told him Y/N wasn't here. What's going on?"

"Steve, I hate when you call me James." Bucky groaned, running his metal hand down his face.

"Then fill me in." Steve shot back.

"Y/N's here with me, she's asleep. Don't worry, she's safe and I'm sleeping on the couch." Steve sighed in relief as he heard that his daughter was safe, with someone he trusted, but he couldn't help but wonder what happened to lead her to Bucky instead of her own flesh and blood.

"What happened?"

"I don't think I should be the one to tell you, Steve. Y/N should, she will. Listen, try to get some sleep. We'll go on a run and come back to my place afterwards and get her to explain everything. Trust me, it'll be better hearing it from her than from me." Bucky explained quickly, attempting to push Steve off the phone so he could take his own advice and go to bed. He was confident that as soon as Steve saw Y/N broken, beaten and bloodied at the hands of her boyfriend, all hell would break loose.

"It's a deal. See you in a few hours." Steve hung up, and Bucky dashed back to his room, sliding under the sheets next to Y/N as he finally was able to sleep.

~~~~~~~~~~~

Two hours later was too early for Steve and Bucky to go on a run. The sun had barely begun to peek over the horizon, the earth still cold and damp due to the previous night's rain. Bucky could see his breath coming out in puffs as he kept pace with Steve, the air between them stagnant and uncomfortable as they both pretended to ignore the impending conversation. As the duo looped back towards Bucky's house, his phone buzzed in the pocket of his sweats.

Where did you go? A text from Y/N this early in the morning was almost unheard of, but he assumed the pounding in her head from her concussion had woken her up. Before he left with Steve, Bucky had left a glass of water and some painkillers out on her bedside table in order to help stave away the pain.

About to walk in with your dad. He needs to know what happened last night, honey. Bucky responded as fast as he could without alerting Steve.

"You want a coffee?" Steve's question broke Bucky away from his phone, the vibrations of panic and rushed texts from Y/N going ignored as Bucky shoved his phone back in his pocket.

"Yeah. Two hours of sleep have rendered me useless. It's a good thing we don't have any missions this week, right?" Bucky chuckled at his own joke, quieting quickly as Steve shot him a look he couldn't quite place. He thought about suggesting one for Y/N seeing as she was now up and about, most likely spiraling into a panic attack over having to speak to her father about yesterday, but by the time Bucky opened his mouth to suggest it, two coffees were shoved into his hands with Steve holding his own.

They left the coffee shop and walked silently back to Bucky's house, the silence growing ever thicker between them. Bucky snuck his phone out of his sweats, cupping one of the hot coffee cups between his arm and his torso so one hand was free.

WHAT?!

BUCKY TELL ME YOU'RE JOKING!!!!

I can't tell him.

please don't make me do this....

Bucky felt his heart lurch in his chest at the last message, but he stuck to his gut. Y/N had to tell her father what happened, or else he would. As they walked into the house, they were met with Y/N sitting on the stairs, knee bouncing, and fingers shoved in her mouth as she bit her nails.

"Good morning, Y/N." Steve said, brushing past Bucky and going to sit on the couch in the living room, still within ear shot of his daughter and best friend.

"Hi, Daddy." Y/N responded meekly past her ring finger. She glanced up at Bucky, desperately wishing for him to sweep her into his arms and kiss her fears away like he did last night. Instead, Bucky handed her the coffee Steve had bought, holding his own hand out for hers to help lead her into the living room.

As soon as Bucky and Y/N entered, standing in front of Steve, her father was able to see just how injured she was.

"Y/N... what happened?" Steve asked, the air seemingly sucked out of his lungs at the sight of his bruised daughter.

"Daddy, it was an accident, I promise. I was doing dishes, and I broke that crystal serving plate, the one Grandma Peggy gave to me. Glass went everywhere and I ended up cutting myself on some shards. I went to the ER for some stitches and came here so Jason wouldn't freak out." Bucky's jaw dropped in surprise as Y/N spun a wild lie. Almost as if he were disgusted, Bucky dropped Y/N's hand and stepped away from her, gauging Steve's reaction to the lie his daughter came up with.

"Is that right?" Steve asked, a scrutinizing gaze on his face. Y/N nodded quickly, bringing her hand back up to her mouth to continue biting her nails. "You broke an antique gift, I'm assuming either in your sink or on the floor, and you somehow ended up with stitches on your forehead, bruises on your arms, and a black eye?"

Y/N froze in her spot, quickly glancing over to Bucky who had a stony look on his own face.

"Tell him the truth, Y/N." Bucky ordered, crossing his arms over his chest.

"I can't." Y/N mumbled, eyes welling up with tears again as she looked at her feet.

"Will someone please tell me what the hell is going on?" Steve yelled.

Y/N's head started throbbing and her breath was stuttering, her anxiety flaring up. She flinched aggressively as her father raised his voice, something he doesn't do very often. In fact, the last time he remembered raising his voice towards his daughter, she was still in diapers, and he yelled to keep her away from the hot grill outside.

Y/N trembled in front of her father and her savior as her head continued to spin, the living room spinning faster. She once again looked to Bucky, his face a blur of concern through her tears as he approached her. He wrapped his burly arms around Y/N's shaking body, giving her the comfort her father didn't want to give her just yet.

"Daddy, Jason hit me." Y/N blurted, burying her tear-soaked face in Bucky's chest before her father could react to the news. However, Bucky could see Steve's face go from confused and frustrated, to angry in three seconds flat.

"He did what? Baby, how long has this been going on?" Steve's fists curled into balls at his side as he stood and stalked towards his daughter, still dwarfed in Bucky's comforting embrace.

"A year and a half. Daddy, I swear I was going to tell you." Y/N wailed, jumping from Bucky's arms to Steve's, tears still flowing freely as she buried her face in her dad's chest.

"Honey, why didn't you?" Steve's voice may have been soft and caring, but deep down he was infuriated.

"I was scared. Jason said he'd hurt you and then kill me and make it look like an accident. Last night was so scary and I didn't know where else to go, so I came here. I'm so, so sorry, Dad."

"What happened last night?" Steve asked quietly once more, stroking Y/N's hair to comfort her the same way her mom did. When Y/N didn't answer, sobs still wracking her body at full force, Steve turned his attention to Bucky.

"What do you know?" Bucky asked.

"Jason said they got into a fight and Y/N left." Steve answered, still clutching his wailing daughter to his chest.

"I don't have the whole story, but he was right about the fight. He got angry enough to give her a grade 2 concussion, a black eye, and enough cuts on her body for the doctors at the ER to talk about sending her to the psych ward." Bucky explained, lowering his voice during the last part. He had been pulled aside while Y/N was getting stitched up and locked in another room with two police officers accusing him of hurting her.

"Y/N, honey, please tell me what happened." Steve pleaded, holding Y/N out at arm's length to get another look at her injuries.

"Jason's been cheating on me. I found nudes and texts from at least a dozen other women on his phone last night, which led to the fight. He slammed me against the wall multiple times, a picture frame fell and cut my forehead, he choked me, punched me, kicked me and told me if I told anyone what happened he'd kill me and make it look like I did it myself. Daddy, I was so scared I didn't know where else to go, so I came here." Y/N stumbled through the events, hyperventilating between sentences as more tears fell. Steve passed Y/N over to Bucky, who then put her on the couch as his best friend gestured to talk to him in the kitchen. With a nod, Bucky wrapped Y/N into a huge blanket he had on the back of his couch with a promise he'd be back soon and followed Steve into the kitchen.

"What are we going to do?" Steve whispered angrily, clenching the edge of the counter so hard his knuckles were turning white.

"I don't know, Steve. I told Y/N she should press charges, and you and I would support her no matter what, but she's...." Bucky trailed off. He didn't know how to explain how Y/N was feeling.

"She's terrified." Steve finished as Bucky nodded.

"He's cheating on her, beating her for a year and a half, maybe longer. She doesn't have any friends; she has a very little support system. It's like he planned this." Bucky could feel his own rage burning deep in his gut, the urge to beat the living daylights out of Jason growing stronger with each thought of every punch, kick, and concussion Y/N had suffered over the past year and six months. "Was he always like this, Steve?"

Steve sighed and shrugged. "I genuinely don't know, Buck. The last time I saw them together, all seemed well. She was her usual self, smiley, happy, bubbly, talking a mile a minute."

Soon, they were interrupted by another series of hard knocks on the front door. Bucky and Steve dashed out of the kitchen to see a frightened Y/N curled up on the couch, eyes wide at the noise.

"Who is it?" Y/N whispered, voice shaky.

Bucky held up a hand, silently telling both Y/N and Steve to wait as he crept to the door and looked out of the peephole. On the other side were two police officers and Jason, a look of murderous rage on his face.

"It's Jason. He's got cops with him." Bucky answered.

"But.... He doesn't know where you live! How can he be here?" Y/N whisper-yelled, still cuddling under the blanket on the couch. A look of realization fell over her as she scrambled for her phone. She opened her texts with Jason and muffled a wail as she was met with her location pinging over Bucky's house. Another knock pounded on the door.

"This is the police! Open the door, we have some questions to ask." Behind him, Bucky heard Y/N begin to hyperventilate again.

"Do you have a warrant?" Bucky asked through the door, hand poised on the handle as he waited for one of the officers to produce the warrant.

"Yes sir." The cop answered, flashing the warrant to the peephole. Bucky sighed, turning to look at Steve and Y/N. Steve had a stern look on his face as his daughter cuddled into him, willing herself to fuse into his side and disappear. With a nod, Steve told Bucky to open the door.

"One condition, officers," Bucky started as he cracked open the door. "He stays out here."

"I'm afraid that's not possible, sir. He's a key witness to the kidnapping of one Y/N Margaret Rogers, and he'd like to see that she's okay." Finishing his sentence, the officer pushed past Bucky and into his house, met with a cowering Y/N on the couch with her father.

"Oh, sweetheart, I'm so happy you're okay!" Jason said sweetly, rushing over to the couch and kneeling by her legs. The sweetness of his voice was not reflected in his eyes, instead anger swam in his dark brown eyes. Y/N flinched away from Jason, tucking her legs as far under her body as they could go, clutching desperately to her father's arms, deep crescent marks enveloping his bicep.

"Mr. Barnes, Officer Lee would like to ask you a few questions while I talk to Mr. and Miss Rogers. Please follow her into the kitchen." Bucky shot a stony look to Jason's back as he followed Officer Lee into the kitchen, prepared to prove his innocence. The other officer stayed in the living room with Steve, Y/N, and Jason, observing the tension among the three.

"Mr. Barnes, where were you last night around 11:30 last night?" Officer Lee asked, her voice sweet but firm.

"I was at home. I had just returned from a late-night run with Steve Rogers. I made it home just before the rain hit." Bucky explained, pulling out a chair at the table for the officer, then for himself as they both sat.

"What time did Miss Rogers come to your home?"

"I don't exactly remember, maybe 11:40 or so. I wasn't wearing a watch." Bucky answered sharply.

"How long have you had a relationship with the Rogers family, Mr. Barnes?" Officer Lee asked as she jotted down Bucky's answers in a little notebook.

"I've known Steve for 20 years. We fought together in the Army. I was his best man at his wedding when he married his late wife, Marie. I was there when Y/N was born; I saw her first steps, heard her first words, watched her grow into the woman you saw on the couch." Bucky rambled.

"I see, and how long have you known Jason Monroe?"

"Not long at all, Officer. A year, or so." Bucky shrugged, wishing desperately for these questions to end.

"Mr. Monroe and Miss Rogers have been in a romantic relationship for three years. Were you aware of that, Mr. Barnes?" Officer Lee questioned, interlocking her fingers under her chin, her dull eyes meeting Bucky's across the table.

"Yes, ma'am I was."

"Perfect. Do you mind telling me what happened between Jason and Y/N to lead her here?"

As Bucky explained the tremulous relationship between Jason and Y/N, the foursome in the living room were answering the same question.

"Y/N, honey, tell the nice policeman what happened." Jason sneered from his seat between Steve and Y/N, his grip on her knee bruising her.

"It was nothing. I made a mistake." Y/N responded quickly, Jason's presence manipulating her story.

"What mistake was that, Miss Rogers?"

"I broke a picture frame while I was dusting them." Y/N lied, wincing visibly as Jason's nails dug further into her skin.

"Interesting. Excuse me for a moment." Officer Lee had poked her head out from the kitchen, gesturing for her partner to join her and Bucky.

"What was that?" Jason whispered aggressively, digging his fingers further into the meaty flesh of Y/N's thigh.

"Jason," Steve started, putting a hand on Jason's shoulder.

"Stay out of this, old man, or I'll beat you to a pulp as well." Jason threatened, wrapping his arm around Y/N and shielding her from her father.

The officers returned, Bucky following behind them with a blank expression on his face as they stopped in front of the couch.

"Miss Rogers, would you mind explaining how you got that black eye?" Officer Lee asked, noting the tense look on Y/N's face as she was wrapped in Jason's firm embrace.

"I don't remember." Y/N mumbled, not trusting the voice at full volume.

"Oh honey, yes you do! You tripped and hit your eye on the table we have by the door. She's very clumsy, Officers." Jason answered, lying through his crooked teeth.

"Y/N, come with me." Officer Lee said, all hints of formality leaving as she called Y/N by her first name.

Y/N moved the blanket from around her waist, but Jason stood with her, his arm still wrapped around her shaking form as he went to walk with Y/N upstairs to Bucky's room.

"Mr. Monroe, we need you to stay here." The other officer said, clapping Jason on the shoulder.

"What? Why? She's my girlfriend and she's terrified, I need to be with her!" Jason yelled as Officer Lee escorted Y/N up the stairs.

"Y/N do you want him with you?" Officer Lee asked, stopping halfway up the stairs. Y/N looked at Jason, ire burning in his eyes as he glared at her, waiting for her answer.

"No. I don't want him with me. Can I have Bucky or my father instead?" Y/N answered confidently, although she still flinched away from the look Jason was giving her.

"Of course. Mr. Rogers?" Steve instantly stood from his spot on the couch and hurried up the stairs, following his daughter and the officer into Bucky's room and closing the door behind him. Officer Lee gestured for Y/N to sit on the bed, her father blocking the door with his body.

"Alright, Y/N. Let me preface this by saying you aren't in any trouble. Mr. Barnes told us in his questioning that Mr. Monroe had a tendency to abuse you. While you and I are in this room, I need to know every time he hit you, and if you'd like to press charges against him. You can take all the time you need to explain, you can cry, scream, yell, whatever you wish, just tell me everything that happened, okay?" Officer Lee had knelt on the ground, cupping Y/N's shaking hands in hers, a sign of solidarity.

"Y/N, look at me." Steve said, still bracing himself against the door in case Jason broke away from the other officer. Y/N looked up, her bottom lip clenched tightly in her teeth. She was met with a look of pity, worry graced over her father's face. "You're safe. We won't let Jason hurt you, okay? I know you're scared, but Officer Lee and I will make sure that Jason gets what he deserves, alright?"

"Where do I start?" Y/N whispered, untucking her lip and taking a deep breath.

"The beginning, Y/N. Start from the first moment Jason hit you." Officer Lee took her hands away from Y/N's as she began taking notes. Y/N detailed her past abuse from the first time Jason hit her after their two-year anniversary dinner, all the way to the previous night. She explained how long Jason had been cheating on her, the first time she confronted him about it, which led to another beating. Jason had convinced Y/N to work from home so she wouldn't have to explain the bruises and scars she had received due to Jason's wrath, effectively cutting her off from her friends and family. She wasn't allowed to go anywhere without Jason tagging along, and she couldn't even remember a time where he wasn't always with her, making sure she didn't do anything he didn't approve of, anything that would effectively lead to abuse. She detailed the first time Jason had threatened to kill her, her father, the Rogers name dying with her.

Then she revealed a terrifying truth: she had been pregnant. Around Valentine's Day she had planned a romantic dinner, taking the day off of work to clean the apartment, go grocery shopping, and cook until her hair smelled like garlic and tomatoes. She had taken a string of pregnancy tests, and she hid one in the pocket of her jeans while she cooked, excited to tell Jason that they were expecting a beautiful bouncing bundle of joy of their own.

However, when Jason came home with lipstick on his collar and hickeys on his neck, the excitement fizzled away into anger and she confronted him about his actions. In the heat of the moment, Y/N had let it slip that she was pregnant, and she wouldn't allow her baby, their baby to be raised in a broken home. Jason not only didn't want the baby, but he truly believed that it wasn't his, that Y/N had somehow managed to leave the house and get knocked up with someone else's child. He flew into a fit of rage and slapped her across the face, punching her stomach and dragging Y/N out of their apartment, down the hall to the stairwell where he pushed her down the four flights that led to their apartment. The next day, she awoke to Jason yanking her out of bed and showing her the bloody sheets they had woken up on, hitting her once more for the mess she had made. When Jason had left for work after demanding that the sheets be burned and the house spotless when he returned, Y/N finally let the reality sink in: she had lost her baby, and she had no one to support her through the sea of emotions she was swimming in.

"Is that all, Y/N?" Officer Lee asked, jotting down the final notes of Y/N's story.

"Yes, that's it." Y/N sniffled, looking ashamed at just how much she had hidden from her father. Officer Lee, patted Y/N on the shoulder, standing and turning her attention to Steve who was still backed up against the door, jaw clenched so tight he could practically feel his teeth breaking.

"What happens now?" Steve asked through his gritted teeth, arms still crossed over his broad chest.

I need to speak with my partner, but there's one more thing I need to ask. Y/N do you have any pictures of your past abuse?"

Y/N shook her head. "Jason went through my phone every week. He deleted everything I had that could taint his reputation."

"Would you mind if we took pictures of the injuries you have now for evidence?" Y/N froze for a moment as she weighed her options: Jason could get arrested and booked but released on bail due to lack of evidence and speculation; or she could have her abuse documented and guarantee that Jason wouldn't be able to touch her again. She also knew what happened to baby killers behind bars. With her mind made up, she glanced confidently at Officer Lee.

"Take all the pictures you want, Officer. I have nothing to hide anymore." With a nod, Officer Lee pulled her phone out and followed Y/N into the bathroom, gently asking her to strip bare to get clear pictures of her injuries. Once she had everything she needed, Officer Lee left Y/N to dress herself again as she spoke to Steve.

"Y/N, I want you to stay up here, okay? Lock the door behind us as we leave; my partner and I need to discuss what's to happen next, and Jason might get hostile. Do you understand?" Officer Lee ordered, and Y/N nodded, sending a silent question to her father: Can Bucky come up here?

Steve understood her request and nodded, opening the door behind him and escorting the officer back down to the living room. About three seconds later, a knock broke Y/N out of her hazy thoughts.

"Sweetheart, it's Bucky. Let me in, please." Y/N scurried over to the door and allowed Bucky into his room, falling in his arms as soon as the door was locked again. She gripped him tightly, wishing that none of this had ever happened. She heard another door close, and she broke away from Bucky to slink over to the window, glancing through the glass to see her father and the two police officers talking.

The trio spoke outside for five minutes too long before Jason had started banging on the bedroom door. Y/N jumped and hid in Bucky's chest as she started crying again, Bucky sweeping her up into his arms and holding her tightly as Jason's relentless banging continued.

"Jason Monroe! You're under arrest for domestic assault and battery, and the murder of your unborn child!" Officer Lee's commanding voice flowed through the cracks of the door as her partner slammed Jason against it and cuffed his hands behind his back.

"She's lying! She's a whore and a bitch! Get your hands off me, don't you know who I am?!" Jason screamed.

"You have the right to remain silent, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law. You have the right to an attorney. If you cannot afford an attorney-"

"Of course, I can afford an attorney you pig bitch!"

"If you cannot afford an attorney, one will be appointed to you. Do you understand these rights as I have read them to you?" Officer Lee screamed back, Jason's tantrum not phasing her professionalism.

"You're going to regret this Y/N! I promise I'll kill you and make it so no one will find your whore body!" Jason yelled, his voice fading as he was taken away. As she continued to sob in Bucky's chest, for once the weight was lifted off of her shoulders. Her biggest fear was currently handcuffed and being forced into a police car, taken away for what she hoped would be a very long time.

"Are you okay, sweetheart?" Bucky asked as Y/N's tears slowed. She silently reveled in how the name fell out of Bucky's mouth, comforting her more than when Jason had said it.

"I will be. I'm sorry you had to go through that, Bucky." The man chuckled beneath her at her apology.

"No, honey. I'm sorry you had to go through that. I hope you know that I'd go to the ends of the Earth to protect you, okay? I'll spend the rest of my life keeping you safe."

"I love you, Bucky." Y/N whispered, her glassy eyes staring deeply into Bucky's.

"I love you too, sweetheart. I'll love you as long as you let me." Y/N smiled softly, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on Bucky's lips. Bucky returned her kiss, careful not to move too quickly and scare her away.

"Well, Y/N, looks like you had something to hide after all." Steve had managed to find a spare key and unlocked Bucky's bedroom door, standing in the doorway and watching as his best friend kissed his daughter.

"Steve-"

"Daddy!"

"Stop it. I'm not upset. I've been rooting for you two for a while now. Bucky is terrible at hiding his feelings, just like you, Y/N." Steve chuckled, a small smile on his face. Y/N and Bucky smiled back, Y/N crawling out of Bucky's lap to go hug her father.

"What happens now?" Y/N asked, her voice muffled by her father's shirt.

"I don't care what you and Bucky do next, just leave me out of it!" Steve joked. Bucky barked out a laugh as Y/N giggled.

"You know what I meant, Daddy." Y/N clarified, pulling her face out of Steve's shirt.

"I don't know. Officer Lee said she'd call me for the next steps, but you might have to testify in court. We'll figure this out, okay? For now, I'll leave you and Bucky to do whatever you wish. Will you be okay?" Steve explained.

"I'll be okay, Daddy. Thank you."

"You're welcome, honey. I'll see you later for dinner?" With a nod from Y/N, Steve kissed her forehead, straying from the stitched cut before letting himself out of Bucky's house.

"I could have sworn he would have been upset." Y/N sighed.

"I did too. You want to watch some more FRIENDS?" Bucky asked, patting the bed when Y/N nodded and smiled at him.

Another kiss comforted both Y/N and Bucky as the new couple settled onto the bed, FRIENDS playing on the tv. Once more, they clapped to the theme song and settled in for a quick binge of Y/N's favorite show.

Although he would have loved to beat Jason to a pulp, getting him arrested was a close second to Bucky. He was finally happy that his girl was safe, and he couldn't wait to show her what being loved actually felt like.

#bucky barnes imagine #avengers imagine #fluff #angst #bucky x reader #bucky barnes fluff #bucky imagine #bucky barnes fanfic #james bucky buchanan barnes #bucky fanfic #bucky x you #bucky barnes #steve rogers #winter soldier

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bubba-draws · 6 months

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Ok I'll bite; in the Radi Vessel AU, what would Hollow's relationship with Ghost be? Would they be hostile toward them, welcoming as long as they don't try and stop them, or protective toward them to try and make up for the past? Heck, I could even see in that case Radi!Hollow trying to keep Ghost at their side at all times and learning to gaslight them into staying with them?

OK SO It took me a bit to answer this because to me the relationship between Ghost and Hollow is very unusual, especially bc of personal Headcanons I have about them

To me Ghost and Hollow were somewhat closer the moment both of them hatched in the Abyss, maybe not 100% attached to each other, but they still did care about the other, up until Hollow was picked by PK and they just decided to go with him, not thinking too much about their decision at that moment bc, well, you cannot expect a kid to take good decisions HAKDHAJD

I don't think Ghost felt betrayed? Just very confused as to why their sibling isn't there anymore? and lonely because there was barely any living vessel down there and the ones that lived didn't want anything to do with them (kinda like when u take a puppy from their litter and it misses their presence)

After they escaped the Abyss and went out of Hallownest, Ghost would eventually forget about Hollow (because bugs that leave Hallownest lose their memories), in the other hand though, Hollow does remember Ghost, and as they grew older they would always wonder happened to them (They were definitely dead, right? Just like the rest of their siblings down there, right?) But as the Hollow Knight they forbid themselves to think too much about it and then as the Radiance Vessel there was no point on wondering, even if they left the Abyss to exist, they could no longer go there, for their light was dangerous to the void and vice versa, if they were dead finding their mask was hopeless, if they were alive they would def try and attack them or hide from them

In the game Ghost comes back to Hallownest bc of Hollow no longer being able to hold on the Radiance, their scream (or rather Radi's scream, though I'd like to think part of the call came from them as well, even if they don't really have a voice?? It's weird ahskshdjd bc to me rather than following the call of the Radiance it was the vessels trying to find the sibling that called bc they're in lot of pain) calling the vessels towards them, if we go by this au, it would be because Ghost would accidentally stumble back into Hallownest, no call to answer, just coming to a kingdom that is far too eerie

At this point I am not sure how they reach their meeting, but I know it's not gonna be a pleasant one. It would take time for Hollow to recognize Ghost, but by the time they do they wouldn't just accept them with open arms, mostly bc I think at this point Ghost tried to pull an Ultrakill in the kingdom AJDJAKFBSKJG so it's a bunch of mixed feelings

But when the anger of their reunion dies down I think the guilt Hollow felt back then would crawl back, the thoughts they stopped from forming many times finally appear and the grief they were trying to ignore comes in waves, bc hey, the sibling they missed was alive all along! But they don't seem to remember them at all and is 100% down to throw fists

So, to summarize: First there's hostility, then guilt and sadness, then annoyance at Ghost's attempts to fight Hollow but also protectiveness because despite everything, Hollow wants to give Ghost the life Hollow wish they could've had (plus if somehow they make Ghost not wanting to attack anything Radi related then maybe they can use that as a case so Radi can let Hollow search for any other sibling that may stay still alive)

All of that could happen if Hornet does not intercede Ghost before they go bonkers in Hallownest HAKDHSJD

Hopefully this answered ur question! If u got any more or any ideas you'd like to share I'm open to hear them :3

#bubba speaks #radiance vessel au #hollow knight #hollow knight au

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pleasantangelpaper · 6 months

Text

To Run From the Sky (Part 1)

Hi!!! So, this fic is sort of a new thing I'm trying out on my wattpad. It's a William Afton x Reader that is a little angsty! I'm curious to know how tumblr will react to it, so here it is! Feel free to check out my wattpad account if you would like to read there! My user is the same on both platforms! :)

William Afton x GN! Reader

Warnings: Angst, mentions of cheating

Just last month I was swimming in the clear waters of Malibu beach, and now I'm moving back in with my parents in Hurricane, Utah. Where did I go wrong? How could this have happened to me? I remember, but I still don't understand...

The air was cold for California as I navigated alleyways, weaving in between sheds and cars to find my friend and roommate, Bethany, who had invited me to her boyfriend's house party. Upon finally finding the house, by ear rather than eye, as crappy pop blared through the enormous living room sound system, I stumbled up the lawn, trying not to trip over various red solo cups. A few boys stood watch outside the door, joking around, and obviously getting very drunk. Walking past them, I entered the house. Loud music and bright lights flooded my senses, bringing me to a very alert state. "Bethany!" I yelled into the void of party-goers. No response was heard. I journeyed on through the group of people, pushing my way past several drunk guys. I then saw a familiar taller gentleman. "Stu!" I yelled at him. "Oh hey Y/N! Have you seen Bethany anywhere?" the puzzled man questioned. I sighed in discontent, "No, I'm looking for her too,". "Maybe you could go check my room? She might have went in there to sit down for a minute," Stu stated. I nodded my head and walked towards the spiral staircase that adorned his second floor balcony. Stu's house was quite lavish. As I found Stu's room I could hear some strange noises from inside. My brain told me to stay out of it, but my heart feared for Bethany. The door opened, and my throat closed. There was my boyfriend, Billy, and my best friend, Bethany, kissing. My mouth stayed open as tears filled my eyes. "How........ how could you do this to me...... how could either of you do this to me.....". The two struggled to find words as they pulled apart from one another. I stood heartbroken in the doorway. My tears started to drip off of my face, creating a puddle on Stu's floor. "Hey Y/N, was she in th-" Stu began to question before he noticed the tension in the room. "What happened?" he asked, a slight tinge of anger becoming evident in his voice. "Stu, baby, he just started kissing me, and I just couldn't fight back," " Bullshit, you kissed me first" The two argued at each other trying to come up with some sort of story that would get them out of trouble, but it was too late. Stu's eyes welled with tears as he screamed for them to get out of his house. I don't remember much after that. It all feels like a blur. I move out of the shared apartment I had with Bethany, and now I'm here, in Utah.

I set my last box down on the floor of my childhood bedroom. Waves of emotions hit me as I stare at the corkboard full of memories. Memories of Bethany and I before we had moved to California tainted the room. I felt my soul fill with rage. I tore down the pictures with tears in my eyes. As I fell to the ground, a soft knock was heard at my bedroom door. "Come in," I grumbled out to the unknown visitor. "How you doing, honey," my mother gently walked into the room, avoiding the pictures on the ground. I just silently cried as she patted my back. "Y'know, I hate to do this to you, but our neighbors, the Aftons, are coming over for dinner tonight, they've got a lot going on as well, and I wish we could reschedule, but this plan has been going on for some time now... we would love it if you would join us, dear," my mother spoke quietly as if any loud words or sudden movements would cause me to spiral again. I sniffled and wiped my tears with my cardigan sleeve, "Thanks mom, but I would rather finish unpacking first," "That's okay honey, take all the time you need,". And with that, my mother left and closed the door, leaving me to my own devices once again. I began to unpack the boxes around me, sorting what I could into the drawers of my old dresser, and organizing a desk space. I set up some stuffed animals on my bed to make it seem more inviting, and I fluffed the pillows that had gone untouched for some time now.

By the time I was finished, I glanced at the clock on my wall and noticed it was 10 o'clock. "I better get something to eat I guess," I spoke aloud to myself. The hallways were dark as I creeped down the wooden stairs to the kitchen. I noticed the smell of burnt coffee as I walked forward, but thought nothing of it, that is, until I noticed a figure that definitely was not either of my parents. "I just can't get this damn thing to work right," the man proclaimed. His purple button-up sleeves were rolled up to his elbows as he prodded at buttons on the old coffee machine. His glasses were on the tip of his nose as he stuck his tongue out in thought, his brows furrowed in frustration. My cheeks turned a bit rosy as I stared at the attractive man in front of me. I finally put two and two together and noticed this man must be Mr. Afton. "Do you need any help, Mr. Afton?" I sheepishly spoke. The man spun around in surprise, "Oh! You must be Y/N, I had no idea anyone was still up, your parents told me that I could stay over for the night," he got quieter as the sentence went on, clearly embarrassed by needing a place to sleep. "Don't feel ashamed, I'm also freeloading here right now," I half-joked at my predicament. The older man's face softened as he turned his attention back to the old coffee maker. My family had had this coffee maker for as long as I had been alive. I walked over and grabbed the pot as I hit the button to brew. "Yeah... this thing is so old that if the pot isn't sitting in exactly one place it just doesn't go," I sighed at the fact that we were still using this thing. Mr. Afton chuckled at the piece of old tech and ran a hand through his hair. "Wow, that's something," he said in disbelief. Once the pot was done brewing, I pulled down two coffee mugs, one a pale blue with white bunnies dancing across it, and the other a pale yellow with the same design. "Sorry Mr. Afton, I think these bunny mugs are the only ones clean," I laughed a little at the cute designs in contrast to this grown man. "That's fine, I love bunnies," he smirked. "Also, please don't call me Mr. Afton, you'll make me feel older than I already do... call me William," he half-grunted at the statement. I giggled at him as I poured the cheap coffee into the cute bunny mugs, spilling a bit onto the peeling linoleum of the counter. I handed him the yellow mug in silence and took a sip of the warm drink. I noticed William make a face as he drank it. "Nothing like the taste of off-brand coffee made in a cheap old coffee maker, huh?" I joked. "Oh yeah nothing like it," he chuckled back. We stood with small conversation as we finished our drinks. The interaction made me smile, and I felt a bit warmer inside, like I wasn't alone in all of this. As we both finished off the coffee pot, I gently set our mugs in the sink. "Goodnight William," I said, as I walked towards the stairs. "Goodnight Y/N,"

#william afton #william afton x reader #springtrap #springtrap x reader #fnaf x reader #fnaf #steve raglan #steve raglan x reader #william afton x you #william afton fluff #matthew lillard x reader

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charliedawn · 2 months

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DEFECTIVE GOOD PART 19

(Hi. Author here. I spent a lot of time writing this and I am pretty proud of it. If you could just leave a comment or kudos if you like the story. That would mean the world to me. Or maybe share it ? Anyway, thanks for reading. 💜)

The search for JR-6025 began in earnest, and Phasma's troopers scoured every inch of the galaxy in pursuit of their target. Hux remained on his ship, anxiously awaiting updates, his mind consumed with the thought of reclaiming her. As the days turned into weeks, however, his frustration only grew. The hunt had yet to turn up any concrete results, and he grew angrier by the hour. His temper grew shorter, and his outbursts became more frequent, terrifying the crew and troops alike.

"What do you mean you found zero tracks ?" He screeched, causing the troops to flinch. "What do you mean there are no results ? Did you search all the planets ? Did you check the records on Exegol ?"

The soldiers, his troops, his loyal servants, quivered at his tone of voice.

"FIND HER. NOW ! DO YOU UNDERSTAND ME ?!" He shouted, making the soldiers flinch.

The stormtroopers scoured the galaxy, scouring every corner, every nook and cranny for the traitor. But despite their best efforts, days turned into weeks, and weeks turned into months with still no sign of her.

Hux grew more and more frustrated with each passing day, his anger boiling over at the failures of his troops. All of them were incompetent fools ! They were weak, and he hated weakness.

"HOW IS IT POSSIBLE THAT YOU FOUND NOTHING ?!" He screeched when an update was presented to him. He was livid and exhausted.

"What do you mean you have no results ?" He screamed, his voice cracking with anger. "Are you telling me that she simply disappeared into the void ?"

He was furious. More and more furious as time passed.

"FIND HER !" He bellowed, not caring who it was that was standing in front of him.

His rage was only growing.

"I WANT EVERYONE IN THE GALAXY TO BE SCANNED !" He shouted, not caring about the amount of resources he would waste, he didn't care anymore.

"I DON'T WANT TO HEAR ANOTHER EXCUSE !" He screeched, his voice echoing across the whole fleet.

"FIND HER !" He growled, his heart beating so fast he felt like it would explode any second now. However, he was surprised when a message appeared on his holopad...

It was a message from JR-6025...

He answered the call.

Hux’s anger boiled over at the sight of JR's face, his hands shaking with rage.

"What the hell do you think you're doing ?!" he shouted at her through the transmission. "You have no idea the trouble you're in ! Do you have any idea what you've done ?!"

What was she supposed to say ? What could she possibly say ? She hadn’t sent a single message in more than a month. She couldn’t tell him that she was with Luke Skywalker and Rey or that she had disobeyed him by not killing Rey…

"...Sir...I..."

Hux froze as he heard her voice. He felt both anger and shock, and for a split second, he couldn't believe it was actually her. He listened silently, taking in what she had to say. For a long moment there wasn't a sound apart from his breathing.

"Where are you ?" He finally asked, his voice barely holding back his anger.

She wanted to say something...But she didn't know what...She didn't know what she could possibly say to make him feel like she hadn't betrayed him...

Even if…Even if she had…

General Hux could sense her fear through the holographic transmission, and a dark smile spread across his face. "So...you've finally decided to contact me," he said in a cold, menacing voice. "I must say, I'm surprised that you even dare to face me after your little...disobedience."

He leaned forward, his eyes burning into hers through the transmission. "You have some explaining to do, don't you think ?"

Hux felt her fear and knew it was real. As much as he was furious, this moment right there...This had him worried at the same time. She was afraid of him...She was terrified. It hurt his feelings more than any insult he had ever heard.

"You have a lot of expla—" He growled but was suddenly cut off by his anger. He had enough of this. "You'll do well to have a VERY good excuse." He growled, letting out the anger contained within him.

"I am sorry, General. But, I will not be coming back."

Anger and disbelief flashed across Hux's face as he listened to her words. "You're not coming back ?" he repeated, his voice rising with each word. "Do you have any idea what you're saying ? You're a stormtrooper, JR-6025 ! And I am your superior ! You don't get to decide whether to come back or not !"

"Sir. I…I couldn’t kill Rey. She is with Skywalker. He is currently training her and I believe that she might actually bring back peace to the galaxy."

Hux's face contorted with rage as he listened to her words, his hands shaking with suppressed anger. "Are you telling me that you disobeyed a direct order and betrayed the First Order all because of one girl ?!" he snarled, his voice laced with venom. "You're nothing but a traitor ! Do you hear me ?! Do you understand the consequences of your actions ?!"

She shivered. "…Sir. Please. Understand. I am doing this for us. For us to be free. Free from fear. Wouldn’t it be something incredible ? To be able to do something for ourselves ? Be who we want to be ?"

She could almost hear him chuckle...Though there was still wrath in his tone...

"Don't preach the Force, soldier. Don't preach about freedom...Or happiness...Or...Or about anything else...."

His anger was evident...Even if he was trying to...To conceal it...

"You have gone rogue, soldier."

His voice was harsh.

"And if you do not come back this instant, I will come and destroy what remains of your life, myself."

At her refusal to obey his orders, Hux's face contorted in rage, his teeth bared in a snarl. "You traitorous worm," he spat out, his voice shaking with anger. "You dare to defy me ? You will pay for your disobedience."

He clenched his fists at his sides, his chest rising and falling with each labored breath. "You think you can hide from me ? You think you can outrun me ?" he continued, his voice rising in volume. "You are a fool ! I will find you, JR-6025, and you will regret the day you decided to cross me. Come back now. And I might forgive your obvious mistake."

"…Sir. I…" She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth. "I wish I could. I said I believed in you and that I would always be loyal to you. But, I want…I want to be happy, sir. I want to…I want to give us the choices we were deprived all our lives."

At her words, Hux's anger seethed even hotter. "You think you can give me choices ? You think you can be happy ?" he spat out with loathing. "You are nothing but a soldier, JR-6025. You do not get to make decisions. You obey orders. That is your purpose. And I order you to come back now. You are a stormtrooper. A machine. A tool...Nothing else."

He was gritting his teeth and his eyes were almost burning her.

"You do not understand love. You do not understand the Force. And you definitely do not understand happiness."

He laughed as he said it...

"The only thing a stormtrooper should know is obedience."

Hux felt a deep sense of betrayal growing inside him. She had disobeyed him, had gone against everything they had ever stood for, had turned her back on him and the First Order, all for what ? Her own freedom ?

He was furious...And his anger only grew as he heard the words coming out of her mouth.

"You are nothing but a tool." And now he wasn't even trying to hide his rage. "You have no free will. No desires. You exist to serve the First Order."

Those words hurt her deeply and she sighed as she knew the next words would cost her even more.

"…Then how come I think I fell in love with you ?"

There was suddenly a deafening silence.

"What...did you just say ?" he asked in a quiet voice, his jaw hanging open in disbelief.

She remained silent. They both stood in silence, the transmission filled with a palpable tension. Hux was speechless...He felt his heart freeze for a split second...

Did she just...Did she actually say what he thought she said ? His eyes darted around as he struggled to hear the sound of his own thoughts.

"What..." He said finally, quietly. "...Did you just say...you...."

He was stuttering, trying to process this information. She smiled weakly at his stuttering. She was shaking herself. She just wanted him to see her as something else than just a stormtrooper.

"…I think I fell in love with you."

If she was expecting a reaction from him...She got it. Silence...Followed by a deep breath as his hands started quivering. She had just said the words...The words that he had feared the most. That the feeling he was holding on to...That was growing with each passing day...Was real. She had admitted that...She...She did fell in love...With him. And he felt his heart skip a beat.

But, he quickly composed himself and his eyes let no emotion show.

Finally, Hux spoke again. "Did you...really think that I would abandon my plans for you ?" he asked, his voice low and ominous.

He took a step closer to the transmission device, his face mere inches from hers. "You're a valuable asset," he continued. "Something to use and manipulate for my own gain. You're nothing more than that."

His words cut like a blade. She had been prepared for a negative reaction, but this...It hit her in a way she had never expected.

She was nothing.

Just a tool to him.

Just something to be used and discarded.

Just something...Something he had never really seen as...as a person.

JR-6025's heart sank. She had held onto the hopes that he felt the same way for her. Maybe it was her naivety or just pure foolishness. But still...She had held onto hope...

But all of that shattered at his cold words...

"…Yes, sir," Her voice was void of any emotions as she said it...He could sense the emotions in her voice. Even if she had tried to hide it, he could figure out how hurt she was. How she felt like she had been betrayed. And how her heart was broken.

"You thought I loved you..." He said softly, almost whispering. "You thought we were in love."

"You kissed me, general." She reminded him.

His eyes snapped up as soon as she reminded him of that. The kiss they had shared...It felt like an eternity ago.

"That was..." He said slowly, seemingly searching for the right words. "A lapse in judgment." His tone was dismissive...But that was far from the truth.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath.

"Right…Of course."

She sounded sarcastic.

And maybe she was.

General Hux had hoped that...That by dismissing that kiss, he would break her in such a way that he could make her come back. She would run back to him...Back to the safety of his arms and the First Order.

But something told him that that would not be the case.

Hux glowered at her, his anger and frustration at an all-time high.

How dare she bring up that moment of weakness ? How dare she make him feel like a fool ?

He clenched his fists tightly at his sides, his knuckles turning white with the strain. His voice was low and seething with fury. "That was a mistake," he said, spitting out the words as if they were poison. "One I won't make again."

The bitterness in his voice was impossible to miss. Her eyes watered and she smiled weakly.

"A mistake…I see. Right. Just a mistake."

She sighed.

"Perhaps you are right. Perhaps it was a mistake. Perhaps that kiss meant nothing to you. And perhaps I am just a traitor. But…I will still see this through. I will see that future that I want. With or without your help."

She stood up and stared right at general Hux.

"I will not be returning, sir."

He seethed and shouted.

"You DARE to disobey me ?! To leave your unit, your duty to the First Order ?!"

His anger was overflowing...He was almost shaking with rage.

"Do you know what will happen to you if you do not come back ? Do you have any idea ?" He asked and shook his head in disbelief.

What an idiot…

"I don't care." She said simply, her eyes watering from the rage and pain she felt. "Whatever you do to me...You can't hurt me more than you've already hurt me."

Hux looked at her, his anger and disbelief growing in him with each one of her words. His hands were shaking and he could feel his pulse rise, making it clear of how furious he was.

"I won't ask again..." He said through gritted teeth, taking a step towards his communication device. "Where are you, JR-6025 ?"

She didn’t answer.

A cold rage began to simmer within him, building slowly until it seemed like it might burst out of him. "If you won't come back," he said, his voice low and dangerous, "then I promise you I will find you. And when I do, you will wish you had never been born."

The threat hung in the air like a dark cloud. "Do you think you can run from me ?" he continued, his voice starting to shake with anger. "Do you think you'll be able to hide ? I have resources at my disposal that you can't even begin to imagine. You will never be safe."

There were no emotions inside his voice now...Only pure cold anger.

She was defying him.

She was leaving him...

And she was choosing to live her life according to her own terms.

And in that moment...He hated her.

"You will regret every passing minute that you stayed away from me." He growled. "You will look back at your decision to disobey me as the worst mistake of your pathetic life. And when that time comes...I will not let you out of my sight ever again."

She felt the tears beginning to fall from her eyes. It hurt to hear the words coming out of his mouth. She had heard him threaten and intimidate others in the past...But this hit different...This time it was her that he was doing it to...All the anger, all the hate he hid behind his words. She was feeling it now...

"I won't return." She said, her tone breaking.

Armitage's heart was in pain now.

His fists shaking...

"It's treason, then."

He raised his right hand, pointing his finger directly at the holographic image of JR-6025. He then yelled with a hateful voice, with all his might.

"JR-6025, you are to be executed for your crimes ! And I, General Armitage Hux, will personally see to it ! Do you hear me ?" He sentenced and she closed her eyes. She knew it was coming, but she had still hoped that somehow she could be spared the heartbreak. General Hux’s chest was rising up and down...His breath short...His face red...

"Yes, sir." She said with a broken voice. The fear was in her eyes now...The desperation. She knew she didn't have much time left. She knew that once he ended the transmission, that the hunt for her would begin.

Yet still...She couldn't bring herself to say anything else right now. Her words of love weren't enough to deter his rage...Her declaration to find her own path meant nothing to him now...

He lowered his hand slowly, his breathing still quick and ragged. His face was twisted into a snarl. She could see the veins in his neck bulging under his skin. It was as if all the rage and frustration he had been bottling up had exploded out of him in one vicious burst of anger.

He stared at her through the holocomm link. "You will pay," he said in a guttural snarl. "You will pay for betraying the First Order. Mark my words."

She didn't dare to say a word as he yelled at her.

She didn't dare to look away either...

She knew that doing so would mean a lot worse than his threats.

So she just kept her eyes locked on his face.

Listening to the rage, to the words...And just letting it happen.

She didn't even try to stop the tears that were coming out of her eyes...

His face was cold and calculating. No trace of sympathy, pity, or pity. Only malice.

"You made your choice. Now suffer the consequences. I will see to it that your death is slow and painful," he said, his voice low and menacing. "You will regret the day you chose to turn your back on the First Order."

There was a glint in his eyes.

A dangerous glint.

That glint...That was not something anyone would want to experience. It meant death and torture...

"I don't want to die..." She said quietly.

The words were barely audible, almost a whisper. But he heard her. His face showed no emotions as he answered, his voice still angry and vengeful.

"You should have thought about that before you disobeyed me."

gritted her teeth.

"So be it."

"So be it," he repeated, his voice filled with venom. "I hope you're ready for what's coming, JR-6025. Because the end is near."

He was about to turn off the transmission, his face a mask of anger and hatred. He stood there in the darkness, his fists clenched at his sides, seething with rage.

"You are right. The end is near. For this STUPID war !" She stood up and went face-to-face with the hologram of General Hux. "I will put an end to this war. I WILL save you. Even if I have to drag you to reason with my own hands !"

Hux's fists were clenched, his face contorted with hatred. He was breathing heavily. His whole body was shaking with rage.

"You will do NOTHING," he spat out. "You are NOTHING but a TRAITOR. A DISOBEDIENT TOOL ! And you will pay for your crimes. I'll make sure of that."

He took a step closer towards the hologram, his face mere inches away from hers.

"I WILL save you, General Hux." She stated with complete conviction. Her eyes didn't flinch and she refused to break his gaze.

"I will not let you die in this pointless war."

Her voice was a mix of anger and desperation, but it also carried the sound of certainty.

"I said you will do NOTHING !" He screamed, his voice filled with pure hatred and rage. There was no more control in his tone, just a rage filled torrent of words, all dripping with spite and malice.

He felt like he was losing himself...

"Says who ?! You ?!" She laughed. "I am FREE ! I am free, general Hux. And I have thrown away EVERYTHING that ever made me a stormtrooper ! I am no longer under your control…I will NEVER be again."

"You are NOT free. And you NEVER will be...." He screamed, the hatred in his tone palpable. "I will never allow you to be free...Do you understand me ?"

There was nothing but pure contempt in his voice...Just pure, undiluted rage.

"I am myself ! I am FINALLY myself ! I shall NEVER go back to the First Order ! Not for you ! Not for Kylo Ren ! Not for ANYONE !" She raised her voice again and dared face him.

The look on his face was nothing short of pure rage. "You are nothing but a traitor," he snarled. "You will never be free. You belong to the First Order. You BELONG to ME."

His breathing was heavier now. His eyes were burning into hers with a cold, menacing stare.

"I belong to NO-ONE..." She shouted back. Her voice was a mix of outrage and sorrow. She was standing firm, standing her ground against the General of the First Order, against the man she thought she loved, her arms were tight against her sides and her eyes were locked to his like a vice. "I will not be controlled...Not by the First Order...! Not by you...! I will not—"

Armitage's eyes were narrowed into slits, his face contorted with hatred. The veins in his neck bulged with the force of his rage. "You're a traitor," he spat at her. "A traitor to the First Order. A traitor to all of us. You will be hunted down like the animal you are."

She chuckled at the irony.

"Me ? An animal ? No, general. I am human. But, you wouldn’t know much about that, would you ?"

Hux's lips curled into a smile, but only for a moment. Then he sneered. "You're wrong. I would know. I know you like the back of my hand, JR-6025. You're nothing but a pawn. A puppet. A slave. And you always will be."

"…Not yours." She smiled. "Not anymore."

Hux stood there, his fists clenched, his face contorted with rage. His chest rose and fell as he tried his best to control himself. He hated her at that moment. He hated her with a pure, deep hatred. And it was a feeling he'd never felt before: pure, white-hot fury. He could feel it coursing through him like liquid fire.

This was no ordinary anger. This was a primal, animalistic feeling, rooted in a deep, bitter resentment. He wanted to hurt her. He wanted to make her suffer.

"I will find you..." He growled out, his tone devoid of the emotion that he tried to hide in other interactions.

"And, when I do...I will inflict pain that you will not be able to imagine." His expression was cold as ice. His voice was sharp, his words were precise. It was like a promise...And it was one he meant to keep. "Don't you dare think that you can get away from me."

Her smiled faltered at his threats and she sighed. She used to want nothing more than his approval and now…she felt as if there was nothing left to say.

"I wanted to believe in you. The Force knows I tried !" She shook her head. "I wanted to believe that you were the greatest leader the First Order had and would even see…but you disappointed me, general Hux."

She sighed.

"…You made me think that I could be more than I was. And I resent you for that."

He gripped his own transmitter and shouted.

"I don't give a DAMN about what you think of me," he spat out. The fire in his eyes was like nothing she'd ever seen before. It was a primal, animal-like rage, fueled by a hatred so intense it seemed to radiate off of him. "I don't care about you. All I care about is power and the First Order."

He took a step closer, his fists clenched so tightly it seemed like they might burst from the strain.

"You're nothing to me."

Her heart ached and she restrained tears.

"…Well then…I guess there is nothing left to say now, is there ?"

"No." He said quietly. "There isn't."

The bitterness in his voice was palpable. The hatred and disdain he felt for her was nearly overwhelming...And she could tell. She could sense how much he despised her in this moment...He was about to end the transmission...He just wanted to say one last thing.

"If you're smart...You'll go into hiding and pray that I don't find you." Hux was silent for a moment, his breathing heavy and ragged. He was angry, extremely angry, but he couldn't seem to find the words to express it. He could feel his hands shaking with rage, his heart pounding in his chest, and his vision was blurry with hot, angry tears. But he just couldn't bring himself to say anything. Instead, all he could do was stand there, seething, as his body tensed with anger and frustration. He wanted to hit something, to kick something, to break something. But he just couldn't. He just stood there, shaking.

"Goodbye. Sir." She said and took a shaky breath.

There was a moment of silence, and then General Hux said in a cold, calculating voice, "Goodbye. Traitor."

He snapped the connection off.

She was left staring at the now blank hologram, her face set in a hard expression as her heart ached from the things he had said. The General's cruel words had left her feeling more than just hurt...They had stung her in a way she didn't think was possible. Her breathing was heavy...Her hands were shaking...And she could feel the hot tears running down her cheeks.

"Goodbye. Traitor."

Those were the last words he had said to her...And they echoed in her mind. JR decided to get out of her hut and walk towards the ocean. After a while, she smiled. JR continued to stare at the ocean as she smiled, the feeling of freedom washing over her.

She felt it, and she embraced it.

She let the rain come down on her, feeling every drop against her skin as if it was a part of her.

The feeling of the water running down her hair was like a rebirth...

She was not just free of the First Order...

She was free...

Free to be who she chose...

Free to find her own path...

Free to live at last.

But then, a voice behind them startled her.

"Having fun ?" She turned around and saw Luke standing there, his blue eyes staring fixedly at her. She looked next to her for Chewbacca, but found that he had already left. She sighed. Of course.

"What is it to you ?" She replied defensively—her brows furrowed and her arms crossed over her chest. "Last time I checked, the island didn’t belong to you."

He startled her once more by chuckling and shaking his head.

"You’re right. But, I remember clearly telling you that stormtroopers aren’t welcome." His features softened as he looked behind her at the sea. "But, you really aren’t a stormtrooper anymore, are you ?"

He waited for an answer and she asked herself the question. Was she ? After a moment, she smiled and shaked her head.

"No. I am not." She admitted truthfully and Luke humphed thoughtfully in response.

"Alright then. Follow me." He told her before walking away—not giving her the time to follow him easily. After a moment, she almost ran after him.

"Hey ! Wait up !" She called out for him—but he pretended not to hear her. She was certain the old man smiled a couple of times when she almost slipped in her eagerness to catch up.

"One more student will be joining us today." He simply declared to Rey who looked back and was taken aback by seeing JR-6025. But, she eventually smiled and JR-6025 smiled back before wordlessly sitting down next to her.

JR listened intently with a curious look on her face. Rey looked at JR and the happiness of her smile was contagious. Rey then gave her a quick nod, and JR smiled back in return. JR then turned to Luke, her face full of curiosity.

"One more student ?"

Luke nodded.

"I believe you have a gift. Kylo Ren communicated with you through your mind. He couldn’t have created such a link with you if you weren’t at least a little Force sensitive…"

"A gift...?" JR repeated, her brows furrowing. "You mean that I could learn to use the Force...?"

Luke sighed.

"That…remains to be seen. Your connection to the Force is weaker than Rey. But, it is there."

"But...even a little bit of the Force is still the Force, right...?" JR's question may have sounded childish, but she was just so excited that the Force might have been within her grasp. She wanted to have a special connection to the Force, to learn to manipulate it...

To learn to use it...

She would have to work hard if she wanted to be able to use the Force. The idea was intimidating, but she was eager to learn and explore her potential.

"Will...will you teach me...?"

Luke looked at her for a moment before asking:

"Would you let me ? Even though you know now that I am not the hero you thought I was ?"

JR took a moment to think...She could not deny her disappointment in Luke...But, she could also understand his reasons...In the end, she nodded.

"Yes...I would still let you teach me."

JR thought for a few moments before looking back at Luke. She paused a moment, before she continued.

"You may not be the hero I once thought you were. But, the Force called me here for a reason, and if I am truly sensitive to it, then I need to know how to use it."

She smiled at Luke.

"So, please teach me."

"Alright. Then, I will train you. But, beware. Your training will be as hard or even harder than Rey’s. Are you ready for it ?" Luke asked.

JR nodded firmly, her eyes shining brightly.

"Yes. I am ready."

Luke nodded and Rey smiled.

And hence, JR-6025’s training started. The former stormtrooper was now learning to harness the very power that she had never fully understood. She was ready and willing to learn as she had never been before. This was the start of a whole new world for her. One with peace, wisdom, truth, and enlightenment instead of war and pain.

JR was a very dedicated student. She had been raised for harsh conditions and so, Luke's training felt challenging but not impossible. The only thing that she seemed to have trouble with was meditation. She had never enjoyed sitting passively and allowing things to simply happen around her. She was used to acting and being active.

Rey tried to help her when it came to wielding a lightsaber and both women were trying to help each other during meditation and encouraging each other.

Over time, as JR's training progressed, she began to develop a strong bond of friendship with Rey. They would often encourage and support each other during training and even in their daily lives on the island.

The both of them had never felt like they belonged anywhere before, but now they found comfort in their friendship, knowing that they were in the same boat.

JR and Rey worked hard during training and both grew closer and more confident as the days went on. They would talk to each other during breaks and would often try to teach each other things they were good at.

They also made a habit of sharing small jokes and stories of their pasts when they weren't training or meditating. JR and Rey had become fast friends and both seemed to find comfort in the company of the other.

JR slowly began to learn to find peace within herself...To find that sense of calm that allowed her to access the Force. The training was hard and the meditation was exhausting, but the patience and support that Rey provided made it all that much easier to bear.

JR's bond with Rey was growing stronger with each passing day, and she was grateful to have someone who understood her and who she could trust to help her on her journey.

They were both growing in their skills and their understanding of the Force, and their friendship was a source of strength and support for each of them.

Early one morning, Rey and JR woke up and prepare themselves for their first lesson with Luke Skywalker. They both found him sitting on a rock—waiting.

"Sit."

They obeyed. Luke finally opened his eyes to look at them.

"Tell me. What is your goal ? What would you do if you were to learn to wield the Force ?"

"...The goal...?" JR repeated, her voice almost a whisper...She had taken a long time to understand that word again...She had never been taught to have goals...The First Order had only ever taught her to do whatever they told her...What was HER goal...? Was that even a question for her...

She looked around. At the sea...At the birds and the sky. She felt the wind in her hair...She felt so...free.

"…To catch the sun." She murmured. "And let it lead me to a better life."

She was silent for a couple of seconds...She would never have thought that in her darkest days...She would ever have that thought...She had not had a life worth living...

One of her own.

One that was free from fear.

One where she could do and be what she wanted.

The thought was not foreign to her, but never had she disclosed it so openly before. It was strange, but also satisfying. It was as if someone had finally opened a door—a door that she didn't even know existed until now.

The door of possibilities...

Skywalker smiled and nodded shortly before looking at Rey.

"And you ?"

Rey also looked at him. Her expression was similar to JR's as she thought about it. She was silent for a long time...

"...To...To find my place..." She said after a while. Her voice was almost a whisper. "To find where I belong..."

He nodded before giving them both stones.

"Keep that thought and concentrate on what you want. Those stones will turn your thoughts into energy…"

JR held the stone and she focused on that dream she had.

I want to be free. Live freely. Be myself.

...And the stone glowed...

It glowed a bright purple while Rey’s stone shone a light blue. Skywalker smiled.

"Alright. Those stones will serve you in building your lightsabers when you are ready. Take them as representations of your souls."

JR looked down at the stone. She looked at it in wonder...It was purple. Why was it purple ? Was that really the colour of her soul ?

...Her identity...?

"This is...mine ?" She mumbled as the stone glowed brighter.

"Yes. And they will help you whenever you feel the pull of the Dark Side. To stay and remember yourselves and who you want to be." Luke Skywalker confirmed and JR smiled as she caressed the stone with the tip of her thumb.

JR looked at the stone in awe and wondered about the meaning behind its color.

Purple ?

She had never heard of a purple lightsaber before, but then again, she had been raised to believe that Jedi only used green and blue lightsabers. The idea of her own color was exciting to her.

She turned to look at Rey and her stone, noticing it was blue.

Blue like Master Skywalker's lightsaber...

She smiled, feeling a sense of unity with Rey.

"Now, you will be tested. The stone will lead your path. Just remember that whatever you see and whatever happens, you have to get back."

JR frowned and was about to ask back from what when Luke threw black sand in the air and suddenly, the two women fell asleep.

"Close your eyes and fight against the Dark Side that is trying to control your mind…" She heard Luke Skywalker tell them before she blacked out completely.

JR closed her eyes and let herself go into a deep trance. She was aware of the dark side, and it called to her. Her thoughts began to wander and the images in her mind became more and more intense until they became vivid and disturbing...She saw herself on the bridge of a First Order starship, and her voice rang out.

"Fire."

As the Star Destroyer fired its cannons into the side of a New Republic ship, destroying it, her voice continued...

"Fire again."

"No ! No !" She screamed at herself to stop—but the other her didn’t as she mercilessly kept ordering the troops to fire.

"No ! Stop !" She tried to scream, but the voice was louder now and getting more overpowering with every word she said...The star destroyer kept firing, destroying the New Republic ship. The bridge crew of the First Order vessel just followed her command.

"Keep firing." And she couldn't control her hand...The troopers were going into panic and shouting "No" and begging her to stop, but there she was, as their commander, ordering them to continue firing...

Her mind was suddenly filled by darkness and a dark place took over…the place where nightmares and lies took shape. JR and Rey needed answers, and JR knew she didn't have the time to get them by any other means…She took a big gulp of air before entering the dark place that she feared.

She firstly saw Finn and Poe. She smiled and ran to hug them.

"Finn. Poe. Oh…I’m so glad to see you both."

But, she immediately felt as if something was wrong. She took a few steps back and saw that both men were glaring at her.

"…Traitor." They both said in unison and her eyes widened.

"W-What ?"

Poe and Finn walked towards her and their eyes only translated loathing at her. She shivered and she felt cold sweat run down her back. She kept backing away as their voices grew louder as they kept saying the same word again and again.

"Traitor. Traitor. TRAITOR !"

She fell backwards and her very soul felt sucked in by the darkness—her throat constricted by the darkness which sipped through every inch of her body. She tried to scream—but no sound came out.

Finn and Poe kept approaching her. They were growing bigger and larger with every step they took, their faces contorting with rage and anger as they kept shouting at her:

"TRAITOR ! TRAITOR !"

She fell backwards and everything went dark. Her throat was constricted, her legs felt like lead. She couldn't breathe or scream. Her soul felt like it was being sucked into the void of darkness that was taking over her...

She closed her eyes and once she opened them again, she saw a version of herself with a bog grin on her face and who quickly went to hug Lord Kylo Ren.

"We did it ! Ben ! We saved them ! All of them !"

JR saw herself scream excitedly, throwing herself in his arms while he laughed. She smiled. But then, JR’s smile dropped when she saw the Ben Solo of her vision turn pale and die in her arms. Suddenly, Ben slowly slid to the floor, but her doppelgänger got a hold of him and shook her head.

"No..NO !"

He smiled at her with half-closed eyes and touched her cheek tenderly. The real JR started crying and tried to get to Ben, but couldn’t.

"No ! I can fix this ! We can fix this ! Rey ! Rey !" Her doppelgänger cried out and Ben took her hand and shook his head with a weak smile.

"I gave my life for her…"

Her dream version looked back at him and sobbed.

"No…Why ?"

He smiled again and stroked her cheek tenderly before replying.

"Because, that's who I am. An idiot. An idiot to have followed such a dark path, an idiot for being blinded by my rage…And an idiot for letting you in. For letting you change me…but thank you. Thank you for letting me be Ben again."

JR waited for him to say something else, anything…But when she opened her eyes again, she was met with lifeless eyes…Ben Solo was dead. The image of his dead eyes following JR out of the vision itself.

She looked at the vision in horror as she watched her doppelgänger sob over Ben Solo's lifeless body. She heard the darkness whisper to her...It spoke of her deepest fear...Of the possibility that she had caused the death of someone she cared for...Of the fact that she might have been the one to hurt Ben...

"No...No..." She uttered in realization. She tried to walk to the vision, to help, to do something...But, the vision did not respond. It just continued to play regardless of what she tried to do.

"No ! No ! There must be another way !"

JR was horrified by the vision, she felt like she was witnessing a nightmare come true. However, JR quickly noticed that the vision seemed to be affecting her, and she knew she needed to resist the darkness that was trying to take hold of her mind.

She closed her eyes and took a deep breath, focusing all her energy on the purple stone that she had been given. She could feel the stone's energy spreading through her body, giving her strength and helping her resist the darkness. She remembered the lessons that she had been taught about the Force, about maintaining a connection to the light.

"Resist...Resist...Resist."

Why is this vision so painful...?

JR felt more than she ever had. A pain that went deeper than the wounds that had been inflicted upon her during her time serving the First Order…A pain that was deeper than anything she had ever felt before…It was a despair and grief that was so profound, so intense that it felt as if it was tearing apart her soul…It was so powerful, so overwhelming, that she couldn’t even bring herself to move…To run away…And she couldn’t stop crying either.

JR couldn't breathe, couldn't move. She was completely paralyzed by her worst fears. She couldn't resist the images the vision showed to her.

All sorts of possibilities were playing in her head. Was it possible that she would cause Ben's death ?

The darkness had seeped deep into her and spread like poison throughout her, corrupting her mind and making her thoughts distorted and irrational.

She tried to focus on the stone, but it felt as if the darkness was getting stronger and the stone weaker...

"…Hello, JR-6025." A voice called behind her and her breath hitched.

No…Not him. Please.

She closed her eyes and slowly turned around to find general Hux standing there.

"So…this is the end ?" He asked, not seeming particularly shocked or scared while JR was wondering what was going on. He even smiled when she faced him.

"General…I…What ?" She asked—confused. But then, her eyes looked down to see that she had a blaster in her hand—pointed at him.

"Well…I suppose that it was inevitable. If it's of any consolation, I'm happy that it's you. It makes it all the more…personal, don’t you think ?"

JR couldn't believe what she was seeing. General Hux, the one who had commanded her and the other stormtroopers for so long, was standing there smiling at her despite the gun in her hand. The thought of shooting him made her feel sick to her stomach. But he seemed unfazed, almost as if he welcomed death.

"I...I don't understand. Why are you so calm about this?" JR asked, her voice shaking.

General Hux shrugged slightly. "I've always known that this day might come. It makes it easier to accept when you're ready for it."

He looked around, the smile not leaving his face.

"I've had a good run. It was good while it lasted. But, I never was made to be in charge forever...was I ?" JR felt tears run down her cheeks, her hand shaking. He chuckled and raised his arms. "Come on, JR. You know that if you don't pull that trigger, it's me who will kill you. I am ready. Are you ?"

JR's eyes were wide with shock, her arm shaking, her finger just centimeters from the trigger. She didn't know what to do...A part of her wanted to fire the weapon, to finally end this man's life, the man who had been so cruel to her and had done so many unspeakable things against the innocent people of the galaxy...But another part of her couldn't bring herself to do it.

All she felt was pain. Suffocating sadness...And despair...

"It's not fair ! I never wanted this ! Any of this !" She cried out.

General Hux's smile was still there, cold and calculated, but with a hint of sadness behind his eyes.

"It rarely is," he replied, "But this is the nature of things. Life is not fair. War is not fair. And we are merely pawns in a game far larger than ourselves."

He looked at the blaster in JR's hand and sighed. "So are you going to just stand there, or are you going to finish this ?"

Hux's face showed a rare moment of compassion, unlike the cruelty she had always seen in him. It was clear that he understood the pain and turmoil she was going through...

He stepped forward, his arms out as if to embrace her...

"It's okay..."

His voice was gentle, comforting....

"No. No, it’s not. It’s not." She shook her head and tried to lower the blaster—but she couldn’t.

There was a moment of complete silence, broken only by her sobbing and the sounds of the wind and the rain.

General Hux looked at her, his eyes full of acceptance.

"It's alright."

JR's hand trembled as she raised the blaster's aim, pointing directly at General Hux's chest. She couldn't bring herself to pull the trigger...

"I want to hate you. I want to hate you, but I can’t." She cried harder. "It would be so much easier…"

He chuckled. "I understand. Believe me, I know what it feels like to want to hate someone and yet be unable to do so."

He took another step closer to her, his chest just centimeters away from the blaster.

"Go ahead. Pull the trigger," he said softly, "and end this."

"No."

They stood there in silence for a moment, the only sound being the sound of JR crying. General Hux placed his hand on top of hers, steadying her shaking arm.

"JR...do what you must."

Those words broke something inside of her. All her hatred, all her pain, all her sadness came crashing down like a tidal wave, overwhelming her, and in that moment, she knew what she had to do.

"I can’t. I can’t kill you. I can’t. I…" She stopped herself and looked at him. "Please. There must be another way. I can’t…do this. Please. Please."

General Hux's expression softened slightly. He understood what she was saying, and he wished more than anything else that there had been another way...

But there wasn't...

He moved closer, placing his hand over hers on top of the blaster.

"Sometimes in life, there are no choices."

He took a step towards her and suddenly, JR pulled the trigger unintentionally. He was thrown backwards because of the force of the blast and, in his final moment, forced himself to smile at JR—blood dripping from his mouth.

"Goodbye, JR-6025."

He collapsed and JR’s gun fell to the floor. She took a step back. This was a nightmare. She wanted to wake up…

"Nooo !" She screamed and quickly threw the blaster away and dropped to her knees—pulling his body close to hers. "Please. No. Stay. Stay with me. Don’t go."

JR held onto his body, tears rolling down her cheeks as she begged for him to stay with her, but it was too late. General Hux was gone. She was left alone, holding onto his lifeless body, with nothing but her pain and grief to keep her company. She had hated him for so long, but now...all she felt was sadness. All she felt was the pain of losing someone she had never expected to care about.

Her pleas were ignored as he lay there, unmoving.

JR held onto his body, tears rolling down her face as she realized that he was gone. "No...please...come back..."

She continued to hold onto him tightly and shake him, hoping beyond hope that somehow, someway, he would open his eyes and look back at her once more…

But he didn't. He remained still in the darkness at her feet…cold and quiet.

She pulled his body close to hers, cradling his head on her shoulder and cried for what felt like hours until she couldn't anymore. The darkness that had been surrounding her was slowly starting to become less oppressive...and more welcoming...In the darkness, JR could feel the Dark Side growing and feeding off every negative emotion she had been feeling over the course of her life. It was like a bottomless pit that was willing to take all the suffering inside of her. Her thoughts grew distorted and she felt the cold, soothing embrace of the darkness as it enveloped her, comforting her pain and her tears.

She couldn't see anything and her thoughts grew even more warped as she felt like she was falling deeper into this pit...

"Resistance scum !" JR suddenly heard and looked around to find herself surrounded by the shadows. She narrowed her eyes as she saw red light coming through the dense dark fog. She barely managed to get out of the way as a red lightsaber almost cut off her head. She backed away and saw a dark-hooded figure stand forward. JR was panting as her heart squeezed in fear as the hooded figure stood before her and revealed its face.

Rey.

Her red eyes were looking down at her and she sneered.

"Surprised ? Of course you are...I finally took my rightful place as the Empress ! As Ren wanted. As YOU wanted. Aren’t you proud of me, JR ?The Resistance is crushed…And all that is left of it is you."

JR shook her head in disbelief as she thought about Poe, Finn and Leia…

"No. It…It can't be."

Rey laughed evilly before looking back at her disdainfully.

"How ironic, the traitor becomes the last one standing…Tell me, how does it feel to lose everything ? To have failed to save anyone, you couldn't even save your precious general Hux, of course you couldn't save me, or Ben or anyone.."

JR's heart nearly stopped at the image of Rey standing before her, a sinister and evil grin on her face, her lightsaber glowing an ominous red.

She couldn't believe it...it wasn't possible...

But the cruel, cold, and calculating look in her eyes told her everything she needed to know...

The darkness had claimed Rey, and now her only friend in the galaxy had become her worst enemy. The girl she thought she could trust and rely on had turned into a monster...and she was here to kill her.

"You are nothing but a nightmare ! An hallucination ! An apparition here to make me fall into despair and fear !" JR shouted and gritted her teeth before slowly standing up. She felt the darkness starting to wrap its tendrils around her mind, its cold touch making her shudder. However, she pushed it back with all her will, holding onto the light deep inside her. She stood tall...facing her nightmare head on...

"You think you're going to break me...but you're not. I won't let you ! I'm stronger than you give me credit for...I'm not done fighting !"

The apparition of Rey looked at her with hateful eyes. "You're right. I'm nothing but smoke and a dream. But that does not mean that what I say has no truth to it. I am just telling you what you already know. That your efforts were in vain. That you have failed everyone."

JR covered her ears while yelling.

"No ! Stop it !"

Rey’s voice entered her mind and JR felt her fingers dig into her shoulders.

"You thought you were a hero ? You are just a traitor…A failure. How could a traitor ever become a hero ?"

Rey’s voice distorted to resemble a mix of all the voices of the people she ever cared about…They were all repeating the same word—over and over.

Traitor.

"Please…No more." JR sobbed and sank to the floor. She had only ever wished to protect those she cared about. But by doing so, she had become a traitor to both sides. A spy from the First Order and a rebellious stormtrooper. She belong to both sides, and neither…She felt their voices in her head—accusatory and terrifying.

She felt lost.

She had already felt the pull on each side, but she was incapable of choosing. She had always complained about not having a choice, but once face with one—she found herself doubting. She didn’t know who or what to choose.

"Please…Someone…Help me. Tell me what to do." She uttered in a weak whisper and her tears doubled as she realised that no matter what—she had been conditioned to never be able to make a choice. She wasn’t capable of it. She wanted free will, but what was the point when picking a side would end up hurting the people she cared about ?

She felt such pain in her chest that she screamed—for anyone to hear her. She wanted someone to stop her inner bleeding and the conflict raging within her.

All of her fears were amplified by the illusion's voices and the darkness around her. The voices of the people she cared about repeated a single word over and over in her head: traitor.

Her failure to save anyone, to make a choice, to have a place on either side...it crushed the last bit of light she was trying to hold on to.

She felt like she was being pulled in different directions by these voices and it was too much for her to handle. She was losing touch with reality and felt like she was losing control...

Unbeknownst to her, in different parts of the galaxy, people heard her call.

Kylo Ren heard it so loud and clear that he fell backwards in shock as her scream reverberated through his head like a siren call. It was so loud and strident that he was momentarily stunned as he looked around for the source of the sound—only to find no one.

"…JR-6025." General Hux uttered in a whisper—her scream having reached even him. For the first time, he felt genuinely worried. It had been days without any transmission from JR-6025 and that scream made him ball his knuckles into fists. Where are you, JR-6025 ?

At the Resistance camp, Leia, Poe and Finn all heard her call and felt her pain. It made them immediately react. Finn stood up and his heart was beating a thousand times a minute as he felt her helplessness.

"Poe ! That was…" Finn started and Poe nodded.

"Yeah. I heard it too." He was breathless too. So much fear.

"We need to go get them." Finn said. They both turned towards Leia who remained impassive as she spoke up.

"Rey and JR are in good hands. Trust in Luke. Trust in the Force."

Back in the cave

The voices in JR’s head grew so loud with everyone hearing and feeling her pain, she was drowning in it, and the voices were starting to sound like a loud ringing in her ears that was making her head spin. The dark entity's whispers were now deafening and she couldn't hold on to any other thoughts. She felt her arms reaching out, reaching up, searching blindly for someone to come save her...

The darkness seemed to be closing in around her, its tendrils reaching for her mind...But she fought back...She closed her eyes and began to recite a Jedi mantra that she had learned from Luke Skywalker.

"There is no emotion, there is peace. There is no ignorance, there is knowledge. There is no passion, there is serenity. There is no chaos, there is harmony." JR could feel the darkness slowly starting to recede...And in that moment, she felt a sudden rush of relief. Luke and Rey had also heard her call. Rey was about to wake her up—but Luke stopped her.

"No. Let her face her fears." He then turned towards JR and whispered. "Use the Force, child. Use the stone. Remember your goal. Remember…"

JR heard his voice and gritted her teeth before retrieving the stone and tightening her grasp on it. Suddenly, she felt the Force surge through her and when her eyes opened, she no longer held a stone—but a lightsaber. It lit up and she held it up in the air—chasing the shadows away.

A beam of light shone through the dark fog; a hope in the dark. JR’s eyes widened as she felt a surge of energy. She held her lightsaber up in the air, feeling its powers coursing through her body and through the air itself. The dark clouds scattered away beneath her presence like paper. As the dark haze lifted, the figures surrounding her all stepped back in fear at the sudden light. They watched as it cleared away, and all of them could see that she was now holding a lightsaber of her own—a bright beam of light piercing through the darkness.

The dark tendrils and shadows were now pushed back and she was feeling their fear and surprise. She gripped the lightsaber tightly and was now standing tall, the light from her blade illuminating her face.

She wasn’t a traitor who failed and couldn't choose anymore. She was someone who was strong and not afraid to face their fears.

The dark forces had backed away, seeing the light that had always been inside her.

She was in control...

The apparitions looked at her in surprise, their forms flickering in the light of her saber.

"Impossible," the Rey apparition whispered, "How are you doing this ?"

JR didn't answer, but instead focused on the strength of the Force that was flowing through her body. She could feel the power of the light within her...and she could feel it pushing back the darkness...

JR held her lightsaber up high, its brilliant glow illuminating the darkness that surrounded her. As the light grew stronger, so did her confidence and resolve. She could feel the Force flowing through her veins, empowering her with strength, courage, and determination to press on. The darkness seemed to retreat further as she took another step forward. Then another. And another. Until finally its tendrils had vanished completely.

JR stood there for a moment, surveying her surroundings with a newfound sense of power and clarity. She had faced down her inner demons and come out victorious...

She finally opened her eyes and saw Luke staring at her. He was stunned at the power he felt within her. It wasn’t like Kylo’s or Rey’s. It was…different. A power that came from a place unknown to him. Luke looked at her with confusion and wonderment. He sensed that there was something...different about her Force sensitivity. It seemed to be a mixture of light and dark, yet somehow...in balance.

As the light grew stronger and the darkness faded to nothingness, she felt the rush of the Force more than she had ever felt it in her entire life, and it filled her with a feeling of absolute certainty and conviction.

JR's power didn't resemble Kylo's or Rey's—it was something else entirely. It came from a place of balance and harmony, a mixture of both light and dark. Something that was somehow in equilibrium...

As the apparitions faded away, and even the darkness dissipated around her, she looked at Luke in disbelief. She then looked down at the stone in her hand as it slowly stopped glowing and she smiled—tears of joy filling her eyes.

"No more fear…" She uttered in a whisper.

The stone slowly stopped glowing as all the fears and horrors that had been haunting her disappeared in silence, leaving her free to finally breathe and smile as the peace she so greatly desired settled over her.

"No more fear," she repeated with a small smile, looking down as she clutched the stone firmly in her fist, feeling its power, while she felt the light of the Force around her and through her—a new sense of clarity, certainty, and comfort that she hadn't felt in a long time...

JR smiled and looked up at Rey who smiled back. Both of their stones lighting up.

…No more fear.

#fandoms #imagine #fanfic #star wars #general hux x reader #kylo ren x reader #ben solo

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