haikyu boys as things my friends and i have said:
kuroo: currently my body has 100 carbohydrates, therefore i am about to shit my pants.
kenma: i’d like it if mario brought out a glock and shot those bitch ass turtles.
tanaka: i sprained my ankle, now how am i supposed to get jiggy with it?!?!??
matsukawa: i think guinea pigs are ugly
oikawa: MY PAST 15 GUINEA PIGS ARE ROLLING IN THEIR GRAVE RIGHT NOW.
*atsumu sucking on his water bottle top*
osamu: admit your gay, tsumu.
atsumu: i’m just practicing for when times are hard
hinata: i don’t want to cough like an ipad kid anymore
suna: no wonder they had the plague, they literally bathed in each others coochie water
kenma: to my assassins, i most vulnerable between my first and second wipe.
noya: YOURE NOT INVITED TO ME AND ASAHI’S CUTE KAWAII WEDDING
tendo: i have socks on and it isn’t tuesday, so it’s not gay if i say he’s hot
goshiki: what’s bdsm?
shirabu: my favorite government organization
suga: *slowly opening the gym door* welcome to the council of queers
kageyama: *slams hands on table* NO ONES EVER MADE YOU STAND ON A TRASH CAN AND SING IM A LITTLE TEA POT
tsukishima: if i was the grinch i’d set that village on fire.
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Omg that’s so crazy it’s almost like in some hyper-dramatized sports anime or something
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VARIOUS | 𝗉𝗋𝖾-𝗍𝗂𝗆𝖾𝗌𝗄𝗂𝗉!𝗁𝖺𝗂𝗄𝗒𝗎𝗎 𝗍𝖾𝗑𝗍𝗌 𝗏𝗌 𝖻𝗋𝖺 𝗐𝗂𝗋𝖾𝗌, 𝘱𝘵. 𝘰𝘯𝘦.
⚘ précis. ≡ you simply wondered if your boyfriend tsukishima, tanaka, kozume, or hinata knows what bra wires are used for.
⚘ disclaimers. ≡ afab!reader, no fem-aligned sobriquets or race implications (accidentally used the black hand in tanaka’s, ignore it lol).
⚘ category. ≡ sfw text convos.
𖦥 m.list. oc.list
TSUKISHIMA KEI.
RYUNOSUKE TANAKA.
HINATA SHOYO.
KOZUME KENMA.
yuyinesque | translate with permission & peruse without theft.
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Tanaka: Oh my Kiyoko
Ennoshita: Don’t you mean ‘oh my god’?
Tanaka: You worship your god, I’ll worship mine.
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*BokuAka in non volleyball au*
Kuroo: Relax. Just act mature.
Bokuto: Mature. Got it.
*later, on the date*
Akaashi: So, what do you like to do for fun?
Bokuto with a deep voice: Taxes.
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Haikyuu!! Season 1 Be Like...✨💕🫶🏽
Date Tech | Seijoh | Karasuno
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watched the barbie movie yesterday and was inspired 🫡🫡
+ version without the uh injuries I guess
they’re just silly little guys
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I’m tired of who’s the top and who’s the bottom
Who goes to the bathroom without pausing the movie so the other can keep watching
And who pauses the movie so the person in the bathroom doesn’t miss anything?
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I'm like 30 years late to the trend but this made me laugh too much
edit: tumblr killed the quality pls click orz
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