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#i actually do have some Concerns about the focus on everyone being terrible to each other
echthr0s · 19 days
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I have a few things to say about Fallout (2024).
I know Caesar's Legion gets all the credit on the sickos (complimentary) side of fandom for having insanely homoerotic rituals but oh my god what's this, it's the Brotherhood of Steel with a steel fucking chair
Lucy MacLean has a face that's made for kissing women. why is she not kissing any women, what's going on
the ghoul lore is truly all over the goddamn place. like ok fine I don't hate it. but it's thin at best and if I think about it for longer than 3 seconds I am gonna poke holes in it whether I want to or not
brain on a fucking roomba
again, can we talk about Maximus and that whole "use my cock" business like please explain to me in detail what the actual factual fuck is going on in the BoS. I'm a visual learner btw
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sketching-shark · 8 months
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If you could reboot LMK how would you do it
WAUGH I could go on at length about this but I guess my main changes would be
A) LOWER THE GOSH DERN STAKES/ LET SUN WUKONG SHOULDER MORE OF THE BURDEN IN A COMPETENT MANNER
Said before that my favorite season of Monkie Kid was the first one mainly because its lower stakes and lighter tone meant that an episode's concern could be wrapped up in a satisfying manner in a 10-minute time period. But given Everything that's happened since then, the now routine world-exploding stakes of the past few seasons seasons are really starting to grate not just because it means one horrific trauma after another for MK and his allies but because the reasons that they happen end up re-enforcing the idea that Sun Wukong--even though he does obviously run around like mad trying to do everything he can to make things better once things have gotten to a really bad point and even though he doesn't ever intend for things to get as horrible as they do--is a genuinely terrible mentor, leader, and friend and an overall bad influence in MK's life. As such, I think that doing a more low-stakes monster-of-the-week formula with a focus on MK & co. with Sun Wukong mostly in the background doing other things but with a decent presence in the foreground to sincerely help when things got tougher for the Monkie Kid could create a good balance between keeping the spotlight on Qi Xiaotian and his allies in their adventures while still letting Sun Wukong be a caring and competent shifu.
B) LESS MYSTERY-MONGERING PLEASE
There's been much fun made of those who act like a plot not revealing all of its mysteries from the first makes for a bad story, and for very good reason. HOWEVER, in Monkie Kid's case I think that it could really benefit from answering some of its big questions earlier on so that characters could deal with them and move forward in their development. For example, I'd love to see an arc that's all about why the Demon Bull King and Sun Wukong had their big battle in the first place and what the ongoing consequences of it are. This could give them a real chance to confront how it's still negatively affecting them and their relationships in the present (Sun Wukong with his refusal to even try to forge new friendships & tendency to push people away, the Demon Bull King with taking out his anger on everyone and everything, even his own son) and maybe even let them ultimately move forward knowing that they can't be sworn brothers again but they can be better and happier people. I'd also love to see an arc that's focused on Sun Wukong telling Qi Xiaotian flat-out what happened to the other pilgrims that resulted in their deaths and the failure of the westward journey, and also that if he doesn't want to be the Monkie Kid any more with that information then he doesn't have to. tbh I think it would be great if MK's hero worship was shattered BUT ALSO came with the reality that if he didn't want to fight yaoguai any more then it wouldn't mean all of reality would explode because he actually could depend on Sun Wukong to keep the situation from getting that bad. So then Qi Xiaotian does go back to his normal life for awhile, but is still irrevocably changed by the knowledge that there's all this danger out there that the Monkey King is confronting alone. I think this kind of arc could conclude with a really neat reflection of the "we are all capable of being Sun Wukong" idea with MK, the whole monkie crew, and others ultimately coming together to help save the Monkey King and each other with some issue in a refutation of the idea that you have to suffer and die to atone and also be a "it takes the world to save the world" sort of story.
C) MORE MONKEYS. MORE ALLIES. MORE FRIENDS.
Fore sure I'd make at least some members of the og classic's Mt. Huaguoshan troop along with Sun Wukong's og sworn brotherhood be characters in legoland. There's a number of really cool things you could do with them, but personally I'd make it so that their presence and role in the narrative acts as something of a response to the yaoguai battles in the og classic. I think it would be cool if for at least a few episodes an issue isn't solved by beating the yaoguai in question but by finding some creative alternative to the issue at hand that would also show the moral grayness of other characters as well as let MK & Sun Wukong himself flex some of the Monkey King's less utilized abilities and powers. For example, maybe the monkie crew responds to a call for help about ferocious storms at a sea port. And when they get there, they discover that this is the work of the Dragon Flood King, one of the Monkey King's former sworn brothers. And once this is revealed, then we have to deal with the situation where one of the big reasons the Dragon Flood King is doing this is because back before he met Sun Wukong he was kicked out of the dragon king family for being "ugly"/deformed in some way (I did see a post suggesting that this is a headcanon in China), and now that the warlord days are over he's been surviving by doing a version of what Ao Guang did for centuries in creating a weather-based protection racket where humans are forced to give him offerings or else he causes floods. And besides the interesting issues this could open up with Long Xiaojiao and her own family, then we ultimately don't solve this by beating the Dragon Flood King until he disintegrates, but by Sun Wukong and MK acting as mediators between the dragon and a few rain and storm gods so that the Dragon Flood King ultimately finds a new home in a desert oasis that the monkie crew helps him create.
Also I think it would be cool if MK got more friends in the form of some of the youngsters from the Mt. Huaguoshan monkey yaoguai troop.
Just a few sketchy thoughts! I honestly do think that there's so many cool and interesting things one could do with Monkie Kid's premise.
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takadanobaba · 9 months
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Yeah the part two would mainly focus on the town's folks first interactions with the twins and their Pokémon. Most would be completely made up since we haven't fully seen everyones take on them.
Potentially interactions were:
Pierre's hostile first meeting the twins and their starter, he places a 'no Pokémon allowed' sign on the door because he's subtle. (He also hints that all Pokémon were driven out by removing all berry plants when they try to buy berries)
Harvey being a good person but they mistake his friendliness as professionalism, he falls in love with Klinklang.
Emmet and Durant mets Sebastian out on a walk, it is painfully awkward. Sebastian thinks a giant metal ant is cool.
Jas and Vincent sneak into the railway. They met Archeops and call her a turkey since she's 'too big to be a chicken'.
OK I've realised I actually have alot more scenarios then I first thought (I have four-five more tucked away) so that part two is actually possible.
Most of the people are just awkward around the twins and their Pokémon but the few who are hostile kinda warp their views on things.
Fun fact: in the drafts of the fic, the scene between Lewis and the twins was called 'Lewis pulls some petty manager-esque BS to bully Train Boys into not fucking up his train station'.
Oh god Pierre. Step aside Morris we might have a new main antagonist lol
For Harvey, we were thinking that he isn't opposed to Pokémon exactly, just more concerned about the health risks they pose. The twins themselves aren't the healthiest people (Emmet collapses from overwork in his 2-heart event....) and they're a bit out of the norm even among other Pokémon trainers. He's worried for them and they find a mutual annoyance between Harvey's nagging and the twins' stubbornness. Here's their checkup dialogue! Ingo is haunted and Emmet is immune to paralysis due to prolonged exposure. They're fine.
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Harvey and Klinklang would be cute though, I haven't considered that!! It fits well since we were thinking that Maru would adore Klinklang too... We were thinking that Maru would be the one to look into getting better Pokemon healthcare in Stardew Valley (with the help of Marnie, since they're essentially animals)... the hospital nerds and Klinklang!
And oh god..... Emmet and Sebastian..... man do I have thoughts on that. Any interaction would definitely be awkward between them and quite possibly end in disaster. I know a few people want to see Emmet and Sebastian together but outside of both of them being the "rude but really just socially inept" type, I think they would clash. Since the twins are on good terms with Maru because she watches over the pokemon for research(/babysitting), Sebastian might be bitter towards them out of association, the twins themselves would feel sorry for Maru for having her brother hate her for no reason of her own. The twins support each other and push each other to be the best they can be, they're inseparable (or at least... shouldn't be separated...) and the thought of their sibling hating them terrifies them. I wouldn't say that they have a healthy relationship since they're a bit dependent on each other, being a two-car train and all.
Ingo would dislike Sebastian for being a bad big brother, and Emmet would dislike him for how ungrateful he is for the people in his life; Emmet's distaste would be stronger though. Along with being terrible to Maru, Sebastian's relationships with his friends would also raise red flags for Emmet (poor guy has trust issues and a low tolerance for that kind of thing). Sam and Abigail both favor Sebastian, but Sebastian has lines about not really seeing Abigail as a friend and thinking that Sam is clingy/annoying to hang out with. Emmet is a little insecure about being the lesser-liked twin and an outcast, he's lonely and while he doesn't bother with faking courtesy like Ingo, he is still verrrry grateful for anyone who isn't deterred by him for whatever reason that may be. Emmet is also a bit clingy with the few people who do win his trust and would probably make Sebastian feel bad for being a bad friend. Emmet and Sebastian are opposites in a conflicting way.
Here's some dialogue made super early on referencing how Sebastian visits the Railroad in his schedules:
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Sebastian has a line about how he used to like trains when he was younger too, but it's very distant and angsty, like much of his reflections. He'd probably think of the twins being passionate about their special interest in trains to be a little cringe.... they would think he's cringe for not liking trains as much as them. I feel like they would project a bit and see each other as a reminder of their insecurities so.... they would not be good being together for too long.
Sebastian taking an interest in Durant would be interesting though..... Durant and Excadrill in this mod are drafted to have a henchman and mafia boss dynamic with each other and are always getting into trouble together so maybe he'd enable their shenanigans.
We do have a bit about Jas and Vincent liking Pokemon too! They'd love Archeops since he's basically an extra big and colorful chicken... the kids and Evelyn are the three people who aren't initially deterred by Pokemon, they get used to it for the most part later though.
And LOL love that. Thank you for sharing your thoughts!
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fate-magical-girls · 1 year
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2, 13, and 19
2. A compelling argument for why your fave would never top or bottom
Illyana Rasputin and Janet Van Dyne do the deed with their significant others standing up. Jean Grey and Ororo Munroe do the deed with their significant others mid-air. Dani Moonstar only ever tops and she looks good doing it. Also Koriand'r from DC is mostly a top, and given her preferred partners are Dick Grayson, Jason Todd, Roy Harper, and Raven, they probably love her topping. Hal Jordan is extremely versatile, and I bet he spends a lot of time being sandwiched between Ollie and Dinah, neither topping or bottoming.
13. Worst blorboficiation
Hank Pym has it bad. Yes, he's pitiable and affected by his BPD, but he genuinely did unforgivable things, and to this day refuses to handle his BPD responsibly. I genuinely don't think it's out of character for him to backslide into nasty behavior or mood swings once in a while because he keeps himself in a state where he's constantly at risk for it. My hope for him is that if Marvel brings him back, he'll follow his daughter's example and do the responsible thing for himself and his loved ones.
In DC, there's also Bruce Wayne. Everyone wants him to be Batdad, but they never acknowledge that there is something deeply wrong with Bruce's brand of parenting, where he can't establish a proper bond with his kids unless they're in costume going through life and death situations.
In Transformers, probably Starscream. Comes with the territory of being a pretty boy plane.
19. You're mad/ashamed/horrified you actually kind of like...
Hank Pym, as well as the Hank Pym/Janet Van Dyne couple from the comics. Not the MCU, but the comics. The original canon, where they divorced because he abused her. I can't really forgive Hank's mistake, even accounting for his BPD, and I think there should be more focus on how the incident wasn't just Hank's mistake, but also trauma for Janet. Outwardly, she's recovered from it better than Hank did, but that doesn't mean she didn't suffer during the Court Martial of Yellowjacket, and the focus shouldn't just be on Hank's atonement, but also the impact it left on her. Even so, Hank is complicated and despite having some very despicable flaws, also has a very kind and compassionate side to him, so he's interesting to think about. Janet is more of a straight girlboss, but she also has a nasty streak, being a somewhat out-of-touch old money billionaire. They honestly shouldn't be together, but somehow keep gravitating into a relationship. I really, really like thinking of them as a couple that love each other, but also hurt each other, mostly due to Hank's behavior. It's fun in a terrible way to write them having a functional relationship but always teetering on the edge of some sort of toxic codependency because they enable each other at the worst possible times. I have so many terrible, bizarre dead dove headcanons concerning them.
They've probably banged in every corner of all the Avenger HQs, even in incredibly public spaces. Given their powers, sometimes they just shrink and do the deed in plain sight of their friends, but nobody notices them because of their tiny size, except for people with enhanced senses like Tigra or Wolverine.
Hank seriously has a body mod fetish because the two women he's been with both have animal characteristics, and for Jan, he himself implanted her with her wings and seldom-used antennae. He also marks every celebration by gifting Jan with modifications to her powers. However, he's too scared to actually admit this, much less get any tattoos or piercings for himself. He just settles with playing with Tigra's fur and tail or Jan's wings.
Jan likes novelty and insists on bringing something new to every intimate encounter, be it a new position, new food, or new place This is why she insists on having a tryst within every new Avengers HQ within 24 hours of joining. There's also at least once where she and Hank wore Hawkeye and Mockingbird's actual costumes (not cosplay) and ducked into a closet together.
Jan still has MASSIVE trust issues regarding Hank, and so she enjoys kissing Hank while he's unconscious or hospitalized and unable to move. She thinks it's the safest way she can express her desire for him, even though she's aware of the consent issues, and on some level she's ashamed that she feels the way she does. At some point they should just do a trust exercise where one of them closes their eyes and the other person touches them unannounced within the next five minutes. But during her turn, Jan would be the one pushing the envelope by doing things like hair-pulling, biting, and even bending fingers back, all to see if she can actually trust Hank not to react.
Hank has definitely called Jan Maria more than once, and she likes it because it means he sees her on the same level as his oh-so-perfect first wife. They've also visited Maria's grave together, where Hank would get so overwhelmed by emotions that he and Jan would always make out at least once before visit was over, sometimes going even further.
Sometimes Hank gets hypomanic and really, really needs Jan to help work off his energy. They usually have the decency to duck into a closet, but there's also times when Hank's sat Jan right in his lap when the Avengers are at the meeting table and asked the other Avengers if they like what they're seeing.
The short period between Secret Wars and Rage of Ultron was probably the most toxic their relationship has ever been. Hank came back from being almost forever lost in the space between realities with Avengers AI disbanded and Avengers Academy shut down. Jan had been abused and abducted by inverted Alex Summers and fought him off to escape back to the Avengers. This is probably gonna need a new ask to talk about all the horrible ideas I have for that time period.
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excitingrbl · 1 year
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as of right now, there are 7.8 billion people in the world.
there are billionaires that have enough money to give everyone a billion dollars each and STILL be the richest person in the world. number one reason why the planet earth is ghetto.
but this isn’t about that… it was just a random thought that occurred while I was thinking. I was thinking about being called a hopeless romantic. despite what has taken place since I was a child, I still don’t believe that there’s no one in the world who would love me the way I want and need to be loved. I think some have come & gone, others keep their distance for whatever personal reasons they have, and there’s many I just haven’t met yet and probably won’t in this lifetime… but they definitely exist.
I think about how many people exist on this planet and how there will always be a possibility of love, no matter how terrible of a human we might be BECAUSE there’s almost 8 billion of us. of course that number starts drastically decreasing when we talk about appropriate age ranges. but even then, there are 100,166,470 living people in the world that are my exact age. 100+ million people are still great odds to not give up on.
so I’m curious about people who fall into despair because the people they’ve chosen to entertain & date, have not been their One. there are millions of people left in the world to be curious about… why would I ever kill all possibility? maybe I’m ridiculously optimistic. maybe I have just enough delusion to keep moving forward. maybe I’m concerned about more than just falling (and staying) in love. however, I won’t lie to myself, or anyone else, and pretend like being loved doesn’t feel good, isn’t something I don’t want, or even care about.
I do. it just isn’t the end of my world if it doesn’t happen how society conditions us to believe it should. there’s so much life left to live outside of being coupled up. there are 73,000 species of trees, 17,500 different species of butterflies, 10,000 species of birds, and about 20,000 species of fish… even if those things are of no interest to us, it’s just an example of how much shit exists that we could be interested in instead of obsessing over finding one human being out of almost 8 billion, that we deem perfect for us.
I haven’t lived nearly as long as any of those 73,000 species of trees. their lifetime surpasses mine to the point that my 43 years isn’t even a centimeter of their existence. while it would be nice to have a life companion to finish out these assumed 40+ years I have left, I’d hate to use any of my time left waiting for that alleged companion. I think about all of the things I felt happiness about before the world seemed to narrow the focus down to a mate. books, food, art, music… I could lose myself in time reading, eating, watching, and listening. I don’t need another person to enjoy these things. in fact, as great of a thing it is to experience these things with people, I enjoy them that much alone too.
I often think about how much we love ourselves and maybe THAT is why some of us cannot bear the idea of doing life without some romantic binding. maybe having someone else validate us romantically makes us feel like living one more day. that isn’t anything for me to judge. it does make me wonder why the focus is spent on finding someone else to love us more than we love ourselves though… of course there’s tons of valid reasons. it still crossed my mind… and yet, I can still hold space for the possibility that people exist who are actually interested in sharing this short life with me.
I’m not a hopeless romantic in a way that says love will conquer all but I suppose I am in that I still believe love exists despite what happens. I don’t see love as people but something we choose to express and share with others… since it’s a choice, the possibility is always there. I maintain the hope that those who think & feel the same will be drawn to me and hopefully we like more than that about each other. until that moment presents itself (again), I have life to keep living…
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wincore · 3 years
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romeo roulette | jung yoonoh
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pairing: jaehyun x fem!reader
summary: if finding your soulmate is the same as a damn game of russian roulette, you are determined to not pull the trigger at all. except, you know who your soulmate is and he doesn’t—and given a choice to pretend, you find that jaehyun is the lesser of the two burdens to bear.
genre: soulmate au, office au, fake dating, fluff (a lot), angst (a little), romcom, magical realism (??)
words: 21.2k
warnings: language
song recs: playlist here !
a/n: behold ! a kdrama compressed in a fic ! ok i was lying there was more than a little angst but all in good fun <3 i have never experienced working in an office (thanks to the panny) but i tried making it as accurate as i could !! hope you have fun with this <3
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It’s not that you’ve never been looked at with a lover’s gaze, it’s just that whatever look Jaehyun has been giving you is mildly uncomfortable. It’s not supposed to be that way. Hell, even his hand clasping yours are a little too clammy for your liking.
Jung Yoonoh. Get your act together.
You wish he were a better actor than this. For someone used to eyes on him in each and every room he’s in, he’s not very good at making eye contact. You’ll be saving this performance. Not to stroke your own ego but at least you know how to behave under strong gazes.
There are three people staring at the two of you and your fingers intertwined, scrutinizing your postures and the expressions on your faces. Maybe Jaehyun should face them instead of glancing at you wordlessly. He’s a terrible liar for someone who acts so smooth. 
You look up with a short smile. The aforementioned three are your coworkers—former class rep at uni and your current boss Doyoung, your friend Soojin and Jaehyun’s friend Sicheng from IT. None of them look happy—like it concerns them. If there was a competition for nosy coworkers, this entire group would be winning awards left and right (and that’s including you). 
They’re going to find out, an annoying voice giggles inside the quiet corner of your brain. Like hell, they will. You didn’t take up acting lessons in college for nothing. You just need to focus on the details.
This whole charade dates its beginning to a week ago. 
If someone were to tell you Jung Yoonoh from marketing is your soulmate, you would most certainly either laugh or take it as a genuine insult. Hence, you were glad when you found that he isn’t. 
It was an accident. You had glimpsed at his soulmark, right below his collarbone, at a particularly wild office afterparty—and somehow, you thought it was fitting that his tattoo was a little red heart. For someone born on Valentine’s day (which you know from a night out with coworkers, not because you’re remotely interested), if his soulmark was not something as disgusting as a heart, it would be the textbook definition of irony. But then again, fate is a funny thing. Your soulmark is a heart roughly the same size, with a little more intricacy in the form of a piercing arrow.
Despite all, however, if someone were to ask you if Jung Yoonoh is the worst person to be your soulmate, the answer is no. You can name at least five coworkers off the top of your head that you’d choose him over. You would choose him over Doyoung (and especially his nagging), you would choose him over Taeyong because he’s too hot and you also don’t like men in a higher position than you are, you would choose him over Jungwoo because you suspect he’s secretly a furry. Jaehyun is certainly better than your deskmate Dongmin who, despite an angelic smile, is: a) too distant to make actual conversation with, and b) in a relationship despite being your soulmate. Sweet-tempered Dongmin doesn’t even know it’s you. You’d love to be the bearer of bad news but this one—you’re not exactly ready for it yourself.
So that’s the explanation for why you hunted down Jaehyun and in a desperate attempt to not seem pathetic, coerced him into a role that has carefully picked benefits for either of you. You just have to bite the bullet sometimes.
“And I get what out of this?”
“Me? Temporarily, that is.”
Jaehyun laughs in amusement and you drop your smile, almost offended. If you were a gift, you’d certainly be an attractive, spicy, hot one—he doesn’t have to look at you so incredulously. In a neat business suit, Jaehyun is as kempt as ever though his tie could do with some more work.  As an HR assistant, his appearance pleases you. However as a person, the perfection annoys the hell out of you. He could show himself to be more human. It would make your job (both the actual and the metaphorical) easier.
“I’m leaving,” he announces with a nonchalant exhale. “You keep messing around during work hours like this and people are going to think you’re jobless.”
“Wait!” 
You jog up to him and block his path, crossing your arms as you huff at his indignance. 
“I said no,” he repeats, and when he tries to evade you, you push him back with your palm flat against his chest. Jaehyun doesn’t show any more discomfort than usual, biting the inside of his cheek.
“You haven’t found your soulmate, right?” you say, taking a deep breath. If you have to resort to psychological warfare, so be it.
His smile wavers and he straightens, no longer leaning against the printer desk. “No. How does that matter?”
“It matters because you’re going to be my pretend-soulmate. Now, don’t be a pussy.”
He opens his mouth and closes it, furrowing his eyebrows. “You can’t always trick me into doing what you want.”
“I’ll ask Doyoung if you say no.”
“See—enough with the tricks, they don’t work anymore. I’ve known you for two years.”
“I really will ask him.”
“Not convincing enough. You don’t even talk to Doyoung outside work.”
You groan into your hand, taking a few moments to come up with another plan. How is your obvious charisma not enough? You certainly can’t tell him how rejected you feel with the whole Dongmin situation even if his rejection hasn’t officially come yet. It’s too embarrassing for a grown adult to go through. You don’t mind being lonely for the rest of your life if you’re successful. There’s a price tag on each decision you make anyway.
“I’ll treat you to lunch every day. I’ll pay.”
You cross your arms, tapping your foot in anticipation. They say the way to a man’s heart is through the stomach. Besides, Jaehyun hates spending his lunch money on himself. This ought to do something.
Jaehyun places his hand in front of his mouth in mock surprise. “Oh no, out of your beloved paycheck? That’s kind of scary, honestly.”
“Jaehyun. Stop messing around. I’m being serious.”
He purses his lips, hesitation across his face. You don’t like the way he thinks, with quiet, lost eyes and no clear giveaways on his lips.
“Okay. I’ll do it.”
You smile in relief though you try somewhat to not let it show on your face. 
“On one condition.”
Your eyes dart across his face, nothing that tells what he might suggest next. You hate when you don’t get to decide on things.
“You have to come visit my family next month and pose as my soulmate—”
“No way.”
“—and when this whole game you’re playing is over, you’re going to say I rejected you.”
You stare at him, weighing the odds. 
“Fine,” you say finally, voice pitched in slight annoyance.
Jaehyun shrugs.
“But I tell my parents that I rejected you. Or they’ll come after you with a task force or something.”
You mutter the last part.
He grimaces, holding his breath for a good few seconds and then letting it go.
“Alright. It’s not like mine and your parents know each other—or will ever meet.”
“Fine then,” you say. “We have an agreement.”
“We have an agreement,” he repeats.
Now, back to more pressing matters. The people in front of you aren’t a stupid lot—even if you've seen Doyoung spend $500 on plush toys, seen Sicheng absentmindedly walk into a desk and pretend to not be in pain for the next five minutes and Soojin somehow convinced a senior to get her coffee because she thought he was an intern (in her defence, it worked). 
The only way is to act through. You clear your throat.
"We… we discovered it last week. Our signs match."
Technically, you drew an arrow with a permanent marker over Jaehyun's tattoo in an attempt to resemble yours. It's not awful, but perhaps not perfect. 
“Discovered? Like just happened to find out?” Doyoung asks.
“Isn’t Jaehyun’s on…” Soojin leans in to whisper hurriedly in your ear. “On his butt? Did you guys sleep together?”
You contort your face in disgust. “The what? What? Who told you that? And no.”
Soojin makes an ‘ah’ sound and leans back. “I should stop listening to office rumours then.”
"You should." You glare at her.
Sicheng is the only one without questions at the tip of his tongue but the look on his face worries you most. 
“I’ve never seen your tattoo, now that I think about it,” he muses, turning to Jaehyun. “Although we’re roommates.”
Jaehyun clears his throat, looking around with shifty eyes. "Why is… why is everyone looking so suspicious?"
"It's just… so sudden," Soojin says, looking around at the others.
"Yeah," Sicheng mutters.
"Soulmate fraud is a big deal too, you know that right?" Doyoung informs. "You could get put in jail."
You throw up your hands in exasperation. "Why would we pretend? We don't have any reason to. And, uh, you're sure about the jail thing?"
You look at Doyoung, hoping your question didn’t come off too squeaky. 
"You’re right,” he says, sighing. “It’s so unlikely for soulmates to work in the same company, let alone the same building.”
“Oh, yes, I’m so lucky,” you mutter under your breath.
Doyoung sighs. "Look, we're happy for you. It's just that… it's a little sudden."
"Literally what I just said," Soojin says.
"Literally what she just said," Doyoung agrees quickly, not wanting to pick a fight. Sometimes you wonder who the real boss is.
"Look, just because we don't even acknowledge each other or find each other remotely attractive or wouldn't even be each other's office Christmas card candidate—"
Jaehyun nudges your side with his elbow and gives you a look that seems a lot like "You're making it worse".
You clear your throat. "That's what happens to most soulmates! You think you're going to land the perfect one and boom. You get a chump from marketing."
Jaehyun makes a sound of protest. "I didn't want a snob from HR either."
The two of you glare at each other, and you find that clenching his jaw makes Jaehyun slightly (around 0.05%) more attractive, or at the very least more bearable to look at.
Doyoung gasps. "Okay, I get it. You're having adjustment issues. I know a guy for that. He's helped every newly found soulmate couple adjust with each other."
"We don't need that," you interrupt, offering your fakest smile.
"You do," Doyoung responds, his smile equally fake. "I'll drive you this weekend if you're free. He’ll give you one free session. No more, because we all know how capitalism works."
People have got to stop copying your fake smile. You wish you could have it copyrighted because after all, it’s the same smile that tricks interviewees into thinking they got the job. It’s not evil if you say it isn’t. You open your mouth, look at Jaehyun doing the same and when you can't come up with an excuse, give up and nod. 
"Don't look so resentful," Doyoung says, tone slightly complaining. "I'm not doing this as your boss. We were friends in college and I'm just doing you a favour. A friendly favour."
Soojin hums in deep thought. "I feel like this is some sort of nepotism."
"I feel like you should open a dictionary once in a while," Doyoung mutters, only to get a vaguely threatening look from Soojin.
"Anyway," Sicheng diverts, eyes curious when he turns to Doyoung. "Why did you call us here?"
"Ah." Doyoung's eyes widen. "I heard promotion rumours."
Sicheng lets out a loud huff of annoyance. "You summoned us here for company gossip?"
Doyoung crosses his arms. “So, you’re not interested?”
“Who said that?” Sicheng responds quickly, leaning in.
The five of you huddle closer in a circle, looking as conspicuous as a cult. 
“You guys know that Jinyoung’s leaving, right?” Doyoung starts.
Soojin gasps audibly only to get a smack on the arm from Doyoung. “Why’s he leaving? He's like employee of the month every month. ”
A few chuckles pass through the group at her discontentment from months of losing out on the title.
“I heard he found his soulmate. Lucky ass gets tax benefits too now,” Sicheng complains. “Why is he leaving?”
“Oh, look who’s interested in gossip now,” Soojin coos.
Sichengs turns red in the face and looks away, clearing his throat. “You’re gonna answer my question, Doyoung?”
“Oh! Right.” Doyoung looks up from a text. “He got rejected by his soulmate.”
Soojin covers her mouth this time when she gasps and you can’t say your jaw doesn’t drop as well. 
“Rejected? Like our picture-perfect Jinyoung got rejected?” you repeat, trying to process the information. “Please don’t tell me he decided to be an idiot and sign a mutual rejection.”
“No, he didn’t lose his senses,” Doyoung responds with a duh undertone. “He’s getting the compensation money.”
You sigh. “Man, I feel bad for him.”
Jaehyun hums in agreement. There’s a hush over the group and you feel fear rise in your chest. You don’t want to be rejected. You’ve seen how happy Dongmin looks with his girlfriend—he’d reject you in a heartbeat. Of course, you could just receive the compensation money from the one-sided rejection and get it over with but you refuse to. It hurts to not be wanted. It hurts to not be wanted by someone who’s supposed to want you. To be specific, it hurts your pride. Every time you see the damn arrowed heart on Dongmin’s wrist, which he tries so hard to cover with his watch, you feel like throwing up. You’re glad yours isn’t as easy to spot—resting right above your hip bone.
“Anyway, someone’s getting promoted to that HR specialist position.”
You gasp. “Is it me? It’s me, right?”
Jaehyun rolls his eyes and you elbow him. “What’s with you?”
“Don’t get too excited,” he says, shrugging. “Isn’t it stupid to get your hopes up over a rumour?”
Doyoung breathes out. “Wow, (name) really sucked the life out of you, Jaehyun.”
You glare at him when Soojin breaks into a fit of laughter. “You- you know what that- you know what that sounds like, right?”
Your face contorts into disgust and you shake your head. “Let’s be more professional, alright, Soojin?”
She clears her throat and straightens her clothes, like a teenager being reprimanded. “I’m your senior. It’s embarrassing when you say that to me.”
Jaehyun speaks up and turns to you. “I think lunch break is almost over.”
You raise an eyebrow. “So?”
“You’re forgetting something.” He smiles, dimples showing, but his eyes come off menacing.
“Fuck,” you mutter under your breath. You forgot about that stupid lunch promise. 
“Hey. Professional,” Soojin warns.
You groan and link your arm through Jaehyun’s, making him bite back a smile. What is it with men and getting weirdly happy about lunch?
“We’re gonna go get lunch,” you announce.
“Ooh, (name)’s ditching quality time with coworkers for dates now,” Soojin coos.
You roll your eyes and exit the office, stopping to wait in front of the elevator.
“I think that went well,” Jaehyun says, shrugging lightly.
“Shh. What if they hear us?”
“Do you think they’re X-men? We’re a long corridor and closed doors away.”
You huff, crossing your arms. “Still…”
Jaehyun’s smug smile makes you want to smack it right off and this isn’t the first time you’ve felt this way with him. You swear he’s not as bad as some of the guys you’ve met but Jaehyun is simply annoying. An A grade nuisance. You can trust him though. If Soojin says he’s a reliable guy, you’ll believe her—she doesn’t bluff when it comes to seeing right through men, though she does have a tendency to believe stupid rumours.
“Your acting was shit though,” you snipe.
Jaehyun lets out a low sardonic laugh. “At least I was subtle when I was messing up.”
You cross your arms and huff. “You know what? You can take the next elevator ride.”
“Huh?”
You step into the elevator just as the doors open and quickly jam your finger to the close doors button. The look of betrayal on Jaehyun’s face is subtle but it’s enough to satisfy you. As the saying goes, when one door closes, another one opens—it’s very applicable to elevators. He can take the other one.
However, almost immediately after, the elevator doors open and you groan, opening your mouth to send a sarcastic congratulations to Jaehyun for pressing the button on time.
Your words hitch on your tongue. Dongmin greets the two of you with a smile, standing beside Jaehyun, who has his eyes averted from you.
“Hey,” Dongmin greets. “Congratulations. I heard the news.”
“Thanks,” you croak, clearing your throat with a bit of heat on your cheeks. Jaehyun looks like he might burst into a fit of laughter any moment and you shoot him a subtle glare.
“Where are you headed to?” You ask.
“Oh, I’m going to grab a sandwich from the cafeteria.”
“We’re also headed to the cafeteria,” Jaehyun declares, with a smile that’s almost devilish.
“No, we’re not,” you say quickly, making Dongmin raise an eyebrow. You hold back a groan. If only Dongmin weren’t raised to be the politest man you know and a little bit more of an asshole. 
You hum and turn to Jaehyun. “I told you about that new cafe. Remember, honey?”
Dongmin makes an ‘o’ with his mouth. “Nicknames, already? Ah, I’m so jealous. It must be great to get along with your soulmate.”
Oh, the sweet summer child that Dongmin is.
Jaehyun furrows his eyebrows. “Oh, won’t it take too long, darling? We have—”
He makes a show of checking his Rolex, a gift he received from his superior that he spares no chance to flex.
“—Around ten minutes left.”
You hold back a groan and plaster on your smile. “Come on. Now is the best time.”
“That sounds like a load of—”
You elbow Jaehyun hard in the gut and a restrained sound dies in his throat, eyes widening in the sweet look of discomfort taking over his features. You smile triumphantly and turn to Dongmin with an immediate change of expression.
“I’ll see you in office later,” you say, bowing slightly.
Dongmin nods and gets off on the fifth floor. You watch in quiet relief as the elevator door closes and turn to your dear companion, irked.
“Did you have to do that?” Jaehyun asks, voice raspy with pain.
“You deserved it. Don’t you dare make this a bigger mess than it already is.”
“You came up with it.” Jaehyun straightens, finally. Apart from the few loose strands of his neatly parted hair, he doesn’t seem all that disgruntled.
“And we’re going to set some ground rules,” you declare, closing your arms.
Jaehyun straightens to his full height, the space between the two of you diminishing. 
"Okay," he agrees. "Then we both get a say in it. It's a contract, after all."
"Fine. First rule, no being weird around Dongmin."
Jaehyun chuckles. "I think you need to be more careful about that than I do."
You pat his cheek. "Focus. Just don't- don't be around him for too long."
Jaehyun purses his lips. "Why are you so uncomfortable around him? I thought you were doing this because you didn't want to reject him."
You glance away, feeling uncomfortable. "It doesn't matter. I just don't want him to know."
Jaehyun hums. "Fine. My turn. No calling me a chump."
Your cheeks puff up as you try to contain your laughter. "It bothered you that much, huh?"
Jaehyun furrows his brows. "No one's ever called me that before. It's always 'oh my god, he's so handsome, who is he?' or 'ooh, I might faint from how hot he is'."
You giggle. "Alright, handsome."
Jaehyun exhales, his puffed cheeks making him look like a resentful five year old instead of a grown man with a professional job. You pause before you get back on track.
“No nicknames,” you blurt. “It’s weird when you call me something endearing. And your flirting feels kind of threatening.”
“What do you mean, baby?”
“See! You’re doing it again.” You cross your arms at the look on his face; anything close to victorious over Jaehyun’s features is unbearable to you.
He raises his arms in exasperation. “How are we supposed to make this work if we act like we don’t care about each other. Guess why Doyoung’s taking us to couple therapy?”
You huff, slightly pissed off. “You’re saying it was my fault?”
“I’m saying we could have avoided that with better acting.”
“You think you’re so—”
The elevator door opens with a ding on the first floor and you turn to find a bunch of interns back from their lunch break. It would be much less of an awkward affair if you and Jaehyun weren’t well into each other’s personal spaces, noses almost touching and with a mutual glare which could be easily mistaken for a look of something more sensual. You jump away from Jaehyun and leave the elevator as fast as you can, feeling far too conscious of yourself. With long strides, you exit the corporate airs of the building to a sunny, fairly populous sidewalk. 
Jaehyun catches up to you, bending and trying to catch a glimpse of your face with an incredulous smile over his.
“Don’t say a word, Yoonoh.”
“Ooh, you’re saying my name now.”
“This isn’t funny!”
“I find it plenty funny.”
“That’s because of your trash sense of humour.”
“Mhm.”
“Don’t look so smug.”
Mondays are the days that make you want to scream in agony, not Thursdays—though they are pretty high up on the worst days of the week list. Maybe this was a bad idea. Maybe pretending to be in love with someone you simply cannot be in love with is an awful idea. 
Soulmates don’t need to be in love with each other, you think to yourself. There’s plenty of soulmates who are just in it for the financial benefits; you can just pretend to be one of them. This dilemma is starting to fray your nerves and Jung Yoonoh, with his lax disposition and dimpled cheeks, is making it worse. And to top it off, you now have to take him to your favourite (kind of secret) cafe in the name of the lies that slipped your tongue. It was supposed to be a quiet comfort spot for you.
You blow a puff of air out and dismiss the thought. Comfort spots aren’t real anyway when you’re all grown. There’s bound to be a breach. 
However, you will not let the (lacking) romance department of your life get sorted out by someone who doesn’t even know you. Lady luck would be an acquaintance to you at most. If fate is a game of chance after all, you might as well be the one spinning the roulette. You look at Jaehyun, piecing together the perfect plan for this seemingly frivolous play-pretend. The game is in your hands now. 
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You blink at the figure of Jung Yoonoh under February sunlight on a modestly busy sidewalk. It’s not something to be surprised at—however, the stark contrast in attire makes you stare longer than you intend to. Wearing a black graphic hoodie and pair of worn out jeans, Jaehyun looks about as casual as you can bear. It’s always weird to see coworkers out of formal clothing.
“Are you just going to stare at me till Doyoung comes and picks us up?” he asks. 
You roll your eyes. 
“You look nice,” he says, and you glance down at your outfit with a flush of heat over your cheeks. It’s just a short A-line skirt, stockings and a sweatshirt. This is as basic as you get. What’s worse is that his comment didn’t sound sarcastic.
“You- You look nice too. I guess.” Once in a while, you will say something extremely stupid and pretend it never happened. The frequency increases around Jaehyun for some damn reason.
“You guess? I’m pretty sure I look more than nice.”
“And how long did you look at yourself in the mirror and practise catchphrases this time?”
Jaehyun’s ears turn the shade of cherries and you press down your smile. You knew that time you caught him talking to himself in front of a car window would play to your advantage. 
“What’s that you’re holding?” you ask, eyeing the plastic bag he’s holding.
“Ginseng,” he answers, staring blankly at the cars passing by. “I heard the couples therapist is in his sixties so he might find it useful.”
“Oh, old people stuff,” you muse quietly. “That’s quite thoughtful of you.”
You should’ve brought something, you think for a moment before realizing that couples probably don’t give separate gifts. 
“Thanks,” you mutter.
He raises an eyebrow. “For what?”
You shake your head. “Anyway, we might as well kill some time. Twenty questions. Let’s go.”
He laughs. “What are we, in college?”
You wrinkle your nose. “Don’t make us sound like we’re thirty. I bet you’re the kind of guy who has his retirement plan figured out.”
“Wrong,” he emphasizes, face leaning closer. 
“Fine. I’ll start the questions, you unsalted block of butter. How many relationships have you been in?”
Jaehyun opens his mouth and closes it, ears turning red. “That’s your first question?”
You roll your eyes. “Okay. I’m guessing it’s single digit and on the lower side.”
He rolls his eyes. “How many relationships have you been in?”
You shut your mouth. There’s a moment of silence, a breeze passing you by, carrying winter away in its arms to make room for spring. 
“Never found a relationship worth it,” you mutter, glancing away. 
Jaehyun hesitates before opening his mouth. “Me neither.”
“Good thing for us, eh? Love makes people crazy.”
Jaehyun faces you with a clipped smile. Never did you think Jaehyun from marketing would be relating to you on a personal matter.
“Oh, but I’ve had enough hookups and I can bet you’re mediocre at best in bed.” 
Jaehyun glares at you. “I am not and I can prove it to you.”
“Is that an invitation into your bed? No, thanks.”
He opens his mouth to retort but is interrupted by the Hyundai Grandeur pulling up to the sidewalk and rolling down the driver window to reveal Doyoung. He looks as overworked as usual, but his eyes are more tired, a bit of makeup covering the dark circles. You’ve heard his soulmate is a makeup artist for an idol group and wonder how they even came to be. Does fate throw darts randomly and pick its choice?
“Get in. Quick,” Doyoung instructs. “I have to drop you off and head home. My family is visiting. I didn’t even get a warning and they think I’m in a gay relationship with Taeyong because we still have our friendship rings from college.”
You want to laugh and agree but Doyoung looks rather pissed off so you hold it in. The two of you do as told, getting in the backseat and shutting the doors in sync. The car smells rather leafy mingling with the scent of fresh clothes and you eye the jar dangling from the rear-view mirror. You open your mouth to ask what scent that is when Doyoung’s voice rings out.
“What’s that?” Doyoung signals to the bag with Jaehyun.
Jaehyun looks down. “Ginseng extract.”
“Oh, the gift pack?” Doyoung asks. 
Jaehyun nods and Doyoung chuckles, shaking his head. “If that’s for Mr. Lee, forget it. He hates gifts. Something about inward appreciation and shit.”
Jaehyun groans, massaging his forehead. “What do I do with this then? Is this guy a priest?”
“Give it to Doyoung,” you suggest. “His family’s visiting.”
You hear an audible hum of approval from the driver seat and turn to Jaehyun making a face of reluctance. Maybe he isn’t so magnanimous after all, you think smiling.
“You’re both quite tame today,” Doyoung remarks, just when the silence is starting to swallow the inside of the car. “Makes me wonder if you need Mr. Lee after all.”
“We actually don’t…” You shake your head. “We’re here and it’s free so why not?”
Jaehyun shoots you a questioning look. It’s not like you can cancel when you’re in Doyoung’s car and already on the way. You’ve known your boss long enough to know the wrong answer to his questions. You look outside at Seoul streets and sigh. 
Jaehyun looks at you, your focus elsewhere and wishes this would end already. He has no idea what overcame him to accept your ridiculous offer but he must be just as ridiculous. At the very least, he finds you quite lovely to look at—not that he’d ever admit it to you. The foundation to this weird bickering friendship (if he can call it that) would be ruined by that. His ego, however, has been boosted up a few notches from the fact that you called him for help. He looks outside the window, holding back a smile. It’s a sunny day.
The therapist, Mr. Lee’s office building is a fancy one with an even fancier lobby. Baby pink leather couches cushion your bum nicely as you wait for your appointment. The architecture is that of a corporate firm and you feel quite at home with the large glass walls by the revolving door. This therapist guy must be rich as hell. The receptionist wears a formal uniform; her blouse is light pink with a grey pencil skirt and you like the look of it. You wonder if asking her where she bought it is time-appropriate. More couples sit around you and you, unfortunately, have to scoot closer to Jaehyun as a result. You do not want to catch that disease they all have. Why are they even here for therapy if they’re smiling at each other in that sickly enamored way? 
Now that you’re here, you’re starting to feel that this arrangement was ill-decisive. You should’ve done a better job of acting. You wonder if you can get a refund for that college course on acting, pouting as the ticking wall clock gets on your nerves. Even the marble floors are pink; the walls are mahogany red and there’s a heart-shaped wall clock, and should you glance around more, you’re going to nauseate yourself. This guy certainly takes his job seriously—or just really likes pink-red themes.
A woman in her early thirties exits the elevator and announces your names, and you click your tongue at the fact that she used Jung for your surname. It sounds distasteful. 
You follow her, starting to get nervous. You really hope this Mr. Lee isn’t as good as Doyoung says he is. Your fraud falling apart within three days is too embarrassing a defeat, not to mention bordering on illegal if found out. What the fuck does the government care about broken hearts and beneficial relationships? It’s so nosy. You understand the financial situation in case of happily bonded soulmates but apart from that, there really shouldn’t be this much discrepancy in the name of love.
Love drives people crazy. You’d rather not lose your good sense in the name of something so inane. After all, money makes the world go around, not love. 
Restricting a gag at the deep red heart on the door, you push them open with Jaehyun to find an old man sitting on a similar baby pink couch as in the lobby. He gets up to greet the two of you, the wrinkles on his face deepening when he smiles. Despite everything, he has a sort of grace to him, the one that comes with growing old elegantly. An upbeat song plays on a record player attached to the wall, although at a very low volume, and the tune reminds you of Animal Crossing. 
“Doyoung told me about the two of you,” Mr. Lee says, gesturing at the two of you to sit down. “How long has it been since you found out?”
“Six days,” you answer at the same time Jaehyun answers, “Four days”.
The two of you look at each other.
“Four-Six days. We didn’t keep track.”
“Ah,” Mr. Lee says. “How do you propose to celebrate your anniversary?”
You hesitate opening your mouth and declaring that you don’t really need to do that crap. Mr. Lee notices your expression and breaks into gentle laughter. 
“I’m kidding. Anniversary dates don’t matter,” he laughs. “It’s okay to celebrate your 100-day on the wrong day. Don’t worry.”
You purse your lips. To your dismay, Jaehyun isn’t as bothered by the sickly pink environment and Mr. Lee’s relaxed demeanour.
“I have a hundred percent success rate,” Mr. Lee assures the two of you, looking directly at you.
“That’s what I’m worried about,” you mutter under your breath and get a nudge from Jaehyun, who has his politest smile on.
You can’t believe Jaehyun has a better customer service mode than you do. If you didn’t know him, you’d be fooled into thinking he’s the nice guy character every office has. Unfortunately, that one goes to Dongmin. You hate getting stuck with nice guys (unless they offer financial stability).
“I think Doyoung might have been exaggerating,” Jaehyun explains calmly. “Whatever he told you.”
“He told me the two of you have a bickering problem. And staring at each other when the other isn’t looking.”
You cough. “That is not true. The staring part.”
Jaehyun narrows his eyes at you. “I knew you were checking me out,” he mutters.
You roll your eyes. “Keep dreaming, Jaehyun.”
Mr. Lee laughs. “Your bickering seems to be quite affectionate. I don’t know what that boy was worried about.”
You press your lips together into a thin smile, annoyed that anyone would ever describe your interaction with a man as affectionate. It makes you feel like an idiot. You were always better off alone—the universe was wrong to assign Dongmin to you. Maybe you needed to see the apparent love of your life clearly in love with someone else to snap you to reality.
“However, what is a playful lover’s fight in the beginning can turn into real fights.”
“Right,” you mutter. “It’s all fun and games in the beginning.”
“The two of you have almost no animosity—you’ve known each other before you discovered the soulmark, right?”
The two of you nod, having already reconciled yourselves to this session. It’s a one-time thing, you tell yourself. It will be over soon.
“The soulmate information shouldn’t influence the relationship you already had. If anything, it should be drawing you closer. First time awkwardness is common.”
He’s starting to sound a lot like your high school sex ed teacher. You get the idea to pretend to be sick and get out of this early.
“Company policy too,” Jaehyun mutters. “Unofficial company policy makes office romance out to be some sort of sacrilege.”
“You know, I was the CEO of your company so I do know the policies,” Mr. Lee says, smiling in the confident, reserved way senior citizens offering wisdom do. 
You choke on the water you were taking a sip of, a coughing fit overcoming you and Jaehyun hesitates before awkwardly patting your back.
“Huh? CEO? I’m sorry?” you manage. 
Mr. Lee lets out a loud, hearty laugh. “I stepped down two years ago.”
“That’s when I joined,” you and Jaehyun say at the same time.
Mr. Lee smiles at the two of you wordlessly. “I have an idea for the two of you. Why don’t you try turning your ‘I’s into ‘we’s? Do some activities together and when you talk about it, you’ll find yourself much closer.”
You narrow your eyes. “You know, Mr. Lee, I’m a little curious about your relation with the company—”
“My recommendations won’t help you get promotions faster.”
“Dammit.”
Jaehyun chuckles beside you but a glare from you turns it into a suppressed smile. The one thing that wouldn’t be a waste of time opened its door and closed it right back. 
“But you know how promotions work,” you press, leaning forward.
An alarm rings, so pleasant in tone that you know it’s a Samsung. Unfortunately, it’s the ugly flip model and you question Mr. Lee’s taste (and wealth).
“Oh, look, time’s up,” Mr. Lee announces, and you think you catch a hint of nervousness in his voice. 
Jaehyun springs up before his ears turn red, embarrassed by the gusto with which he himself got up and looks at you expectantly. You get up, sighing.
“Next time, Mr. Lee,” you warn. “I will get those details.”
“I charge by the hour.” He smiles.
“Stop threatening the therapist,” Jaehyun mutters to you, taking your arm and turning to leave.
“Oh, and,” Mr. Lee calls. “It’s always better to be honest than to pretend.”
You blink in surprise when Jaehyun tugs at your arm, bowing in thanks and leaving the room with you.
“Was it just me or did he see through us?” you whisper to Jaehyun.
He shakes his head, whispering back, “There’s no way he could tell. He’s probably referring to something else.”
“Like what?”
Jaehyun doesn’t answer.
“Tell me, are you always so domineering towards strangers even?” he asks. “I just thought you liked to press my buttons because I’m easygoing.”
You scoff. “Don’t flatter yourself. You’re not as cool as you think you are, especially since you get so hot and bothered by me.”
“It’s just you,” he whispers earnestly and your pulse rises. “No one else.”
You cough to kill the awkward silence and walk faster to the elevator. Jaehyun follows at a leisurely pace and it’s never occurred to you before but the sound of someone’s footsteps can also be annoying, proof currently standing beside you.
The elevator doors open, and much to your appallment, a young couple happens to be full blown making out inside the elevator, hands where there certainly shouldn’t be in broad daylight. Jaehyun whips his face away, clearing his throat loud enough for the couple to detach themselves from each other and hurriedly exit, fixing their clothes on the way.
“So he wasn’t lying about the success rate,” Jaehyun states quietly, a look of resigned horror on his face.
You can’t even respond for a few moments, following him into the elevator and shaking your head to get rid of the thought that inevitably jams itself inside your head. It might have a point, however.
"Maybe we should kiss too," you think out loud.
Jaehyun stiffens, looking at you with wide, fearful eyes. "No."
"We have to kiss, we're dating!" You exclaim, hands on your hips.
"We're not actually—ah, whatever. It’s not worth bickering with you."
"Why? Afraid you'll fall in love with me?”
Jaehyun shakes his head, and you’re suddenly aware that your bickering keeps drawing you closer to each other, your faces nearer than you’d realized.
"If anything," he starts with a confident smile. "You better not fall in love with me."
"Oh, please. You're taking this way too seriously."
"You're the one that wants to kiss me."
Your cheeks heat up. "You're- I- That's not—argh, fuck you."
Jaehyun looks smug, and you have the unstoppable urge to punch it off his face. You take a deep breath. Violence is not the way, (name).
“If we were a few years younger, you’d be begging for mercy under me,” you seethe.
Jaehyun’s eyes shift over your face in confusion, ears burning bright red with each passing second. Before he can open his mouth, you let out a short yell.
“Not like that, you pervert,” you say, leaning away from him. 
“I didn’t even say anything. On an unrelated note, were you a delinquent in school?”
You roll your eyes. “Kind of. I had a temper and a sharp tongue.”
“And now you’re a people pleaser. That’s quite the development.”
You smack his shoulder. “You’re getting on my nerves, punk.”
He makes an ‘oh’ with his mouth before smiling. “You totally did the delinquent accent.”
“I’m guessing you were the shy, little boy who flushed red at conversations about kissing.”
Jaehyun clears his throat in annoyance. “I was not. I was quite popular in high school and college, you know?”
“Yeah,” you mutter. “It’s that face of yours.”
“Sorry, what? I didn’t catch that.”
“Oh, look, we’re on the first floor.” You exit the elevator, leaving a puzzled Jaehyun to follow in stumbling steps.
“I don’t think Doyoung’s picking us up,” you state. “You take the bus? Or do you have a car to flex? I don’t ride in anything below a Tesla, unless it’s Doyoung because he’s technically my boss.”
“You’ll have to do with good old rented Hyundais,” he answers.
You exhale. Maybe he’s getting used to you. The bus stop is opposite the building, the structure squeaky clean and a bunch of people waiting on the seats. It’s a busy place and you wonder if the scammy-therapist-slash-your-former-ceo’s business has anything to do with that. You sit the first chance you get, shoulders pressed against Jaehyun’s for the lack of space and admiring the passing traffic. Seoul really just depends on the lenses you see through. Work days make the screen tinted grey and blue and you hate them often but some days, it’s good to experience those. Weekends are brighter, sunny and usually not with Jaehyun but he doesn’t really put a damper on them either.
You scan his side profile, a little envious when you realize that his confidence isn’t misplaced. You might have trained yourself to be more of a pleaser over the years but he’s the sort of person people come to like naturally. Moreover, his skin is perfect and his hair is always looking styled even in a mess. Fate and Life are partners in crime when it comes to being unfair.
Jaehyun turns to look at you and you snap your head to your lap, turning on your phone and staring at the homescreen for a good few seconds.
“Twenty questions,” Jaehyun announces. “Let’s play again. I’ll go first. Do you check me out when I walk away?”
“What is this, playing my own cards against me?” You scoff. “You’re so full of yourself.”
“So, yes or no?”
“Sometimes,” you mutter. “But it’s not the good kind of checking out. I’m checking out how terrible you look with your mess of a tie.”
Jaehyun laughs, the sound a hearty rumbling sort and you can’t help but smile back at that. It’s kind of cute when he laughs—the sound of it and the way his cheeks are dusted pink.
“My turn,” you say with a cheeky smile as you lean in to whisper. “Have you ever had a wet dream about me?”
Jaehyun chokes on air, coughing out the surprise as he stares at you dumfound. You stick the tip of your tongue out and throw him a wink, thoroughly enjoying this victory against him. It feels great to fluster someone like Jaehyun.
“No,” he says with clear emphasis. 
“Even the night you said I was so unbearably hot very loudly to Sicheng?”
Jaehyun leans back sighing, covering his face with his hand. “I was tipsy. And it was my first night out with coworkers. Give me a break.”
You giggle. “Honestly, it wasn’t that bad. There were worse incidents that night. An intern threw up on Doyoung’s shoes—I can’t even imagine the horror the poor girl experienced.”
Jaehyun shakes his head, smiling through his hand. 
“Have you ever sent nudes?” you ask, wiggling your eyebrows.
He sighs. “Maybe. Have you?”
“Oh, wouldn’t you like to know?”
He curls his lips. The answer seems to be no but you’re at least seventy percent sure he would be attracted to you in a world where your personality traits weren’t being nosy and annoying.
“Do you think you’re a good kisser?” Jaehyun asks, leaning forward to rest his elbows on his knees.
“Definitely.”
He scoffs, a smile tugging at his lips.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” You cross your arms.
He shrugs, leaning in slightly as though flirting (if he had the audacity). “We could test that.”
You feel your cheeks heat up. “What happened to no kissing in the contract?”
“It’s not officially there.”
You roll your eyes, glancing away. “You know, I’m starting to believe you were some sort of desperate fuckboy in college.”
“I- I was the hottest dude on campus and if we went to the same college, you would be pining after me. I literally had the Campus Prince title and girls would follow me to see me in class.”
He crosses his arms, a frown tugging down his lips.
“Ooh, Jung Yoonoh’s getting fired up,” you say in a monotonous voice. “Wonder how many girls you pulled with your chewed up fuckboy dialogue.”
Jaehyun scoffs but he clearly finds your accusations amusing, as hinted by his unbothered smile. He asks a question again.
“What’s more important to you—truth or happiness?” 
The question catches you off-guard. Jaehyun’s eyes are delicately curious, nothing too strong and even so, you find yourself holding your breath under his gaze.
“Huh?”
“Twenty questions. We were playing?” Jaehyun raises an eyebrow.
“Right.” You clear your throat, rubbing the back of your hand. “I… I’d choose happiness, I think. I’m… I’m not sure.”
“Really?” He doesn’t look too hellbent on taking apart your answer so you breathe out. He’s starting to pry into you finally. “I think the truth will make you happier.”
“That’s not- that’s not always true.” You look away, hoping the quietness of your voice ends the conversation there. You don’t know how to talk about it—you never really have. You’ve ugly cried over the lack of your love life to a stranger after five shots of whiskey but you don’t think you can talk about things like this sober. You don’t even know why you answered. Jaehyun makes you feel oddly comfortable.
Jaehyun shrugs, getting up when the next bus halts in front. 
“What did you major in?” you ask, following him.
“Business,” he answers before thinking. “Kind of hated it. But I started out with IT and that was somehow worse.”
You gasp, taking a seat beside him on the bus. “I started with IT too! It was a nightmare. You took that Database Management course?”
Jaehyun smiles. “It was like the course equivalent of reading the back of a Wi-Fi Router.”
You laugh. Maybe he isn’t so different after all. 
“You know, you do look like a business major,” you hum, furrowing your brows as you pretend to scrutinise him.
“So, you’re indirectly saying I either look like a rich kid or a jackass.” Jaehyun raises an eyebrow.
“They’re both the same thing.”
The laughter from the two of you makes an old woman behind you grunt in displeasure and the two of you apologize. It’s nice to talk like college kids again. The Seoul sunlight shines on Jaehyun’s face and you bite back a smile when his dimples appear. They aren’t all that bad. If you get along like this, there’s no reason to worry about fate and the universe and other superfluous things offered to you on a boring old ceramic plate. It’s a smooth ride.
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Your eyes drift to Dongmin’s workspace instinctively and you shake your head. This is exactly why you were avoiding him and even started the entire fake relationship with Jaehyun. You’d choose fake dating a (good-looking) chump from management over embarrassment and possible heartbreak any day.
You groan internally before glancing again and find the desk empty. Surprised, you blink and turn only to scream at Dongmin’s figure behind you.
“Shh!” he says urgently. “Don’t move. And don’t panic when I say this but there’s a bug on your shoulder.”
“What the fuck? Get it off, please,” you say, voice choking up.
Dongmin rolls up a stack of papers and you let out a low screech. “Don’t kill it on my shoulder!”
“Sorry,” he says and your eyes soften as he gently pushes the paper against your shoulder and takes it away. You breathe a sigh of relief and he signs you a thumbs up as he wiggles the paper in the air outside the window. 
“You saved me,” you say, smiling.
He returns it, his most beloved eye smile making you wonder if you made the right choice. Wouldn’t it be fun to just crash everything and watch it burn? You know you want to. Benevolence and grace were never your style. However, it’s his smile again that stops you. Maybe you don’t really want to be the bad guy after all. You’re sparing him from confusion and dread.
You’re sparing yourself from rejection and inevitable loneliness (yay).
It’s been a week, discussing details with Jaehyun before the both of you collectively decided to just wing it and hope you’re not caught. After all, there’s no real way to prove you’re not soulmates if you’re careful enough (the same way you can’t prove someone’s cheating if they’re careful enough but that’s quite a depressing analogy). Perhaps if you renounce the soulmate benefits (and Dongmin didn’t smile as often at you), it would be less morally taxing. You, however, are greedy. When you want something, you’ll do anything to get it.
You stare at the computer screen and sigh, cross checking the employee records for incorrect data and your eyelids start to droop. Of all the days, you just had to be assigned the most boring task on a Friday. You also should’ve gotten sleep instead of getting mad at Jaehyun’s dry responses to your plan of action. It was perfectly viable; unnecessary, but perfect nonetheless.
Soojin rolls her chair backwards into yours. “We’re going drinking tonight. Wanna come? You can bring your boy-toy too.”
You roll your eyes. “As much as I’d love to call him that, he’s still the chump from marketing for me.”
“Or,” Soojin emphasizes. “Your actual soulmate. How lucky is it that you work in the same building, in the same company?”
“I’m not sure if you’re being ironic.” You scroll through the database with trained eyes.
“I’m not. A lot of soulmates don’t even get to see each other because of their line of work. It’s so tragic.”
You’d be glad if you didn’t get to see Dongmin ever too. But you’ll keep that to yourself. You hum in response and hear a sigh from behind you.
“Let’s have fun,” she whines. “Is Jaehyun that much of a downer? He’s one of the hottest dudes in the building. I thought you’d be cheery.”
You pause and think to yourself. She does have a point. You’re definitely supposed to look happier. Your soulmate has the looks of a model and fifteen year old you would fawn over him no doubt.
“It’s the work,” you answer. “I’m working overtime to compensate for my rent.”
You work overtime anyway because you hate heading home to an empty apartment. 
“Ah, you signed a new lease, right? Near Songpa?” Soojin looks at you with pity and pats your shoulder. “You know what? I’ll treat you to drinks tonight. You deserve a day off, missy.”
You smile. “Thanks, Soojin.”
“And,” she adds in a singsong voice. “The love of your life is here.”
You furrow your eyebrows before tilting your head and almost sighing in exasperation at the figure of Jung Yoonoh outside the glass door. He may not show it, but you know distress when you see it. You’ve seen enough squirming undergraduates at company interviews. 
You quickly get up from your seat, praying that he didn’t mess something up. However, you find it cute when he looks like this, the urge to fluster him even more presenting itself to be rather tempting.
“I think you have a sick obsession with me, Jaehyun.” You cross your arms after closing the door behind you.
He exhales, closing his eyes for a moment before taking your arm and pulling you away from the door. 
“Woah, this isn’t high school. You can’t just pull me into a corner to make out.”
Jaehyun’s ears flare hot red and he clears his throat. “You’re in high spirits today.”
You weren’t, actually. Somehow, teasing Jaehyun gives you the same rush as caffeine. You just love when the nonchalance on his face turns into discomposure.
“I came to give Doyoung these files. Or you, since you’re practically his assistant.”
You ignore his comment. “There’s clearly something else.”
“The team sports event is coming up,” Jaehyun starts, hesitating. “I’m not managing it this year. I have to participate.”
“So?”
“So Dongmin has a higher chance of finding us out. What if he sees my mark in the changing room and it all goes to shit?”
“Great! He’ll think you’re his soulmate and I’ll be spared from this nonsense.”
“I’m being serious. It’s already difficult living with Sicheng and having to change with my doors locked. It’s kind of suspicious.”
“Do you guys sleep naked with each other or what?”
“No, but I do sleep with my shirt off.”
“Ugh. Why would you give me that image?” you complain. The image isn’t bad per se but it’s not what you need right now.
“You clearly liked it,” he mutters. 
You furrow your eyebrows. “You’re not doing this just to give me a load of unnecessary anxiety, are you? Do you know how swamped with work I am?”
“No, of course not,” he answers, no indication of which question he answered. “Also, is there a reason Soojin’s glaring at me?”
You wave your hand in dismissal. “It’s just the haven’t-warmed-up-to-coworker’s-new-boyfriend glare. Don’t worry about it.”
He doesn’t seem too relieved but you have more anxious thoughts invading the privacy of your Friday evening. You have to keep up your composure. It could happen one way or another, perhaps in a situation better than a team sports activity, but you have to figure it out. You reject your soulmate anyway—the same way he would.
Glaring at Jaehyun one last time, you get back to your desk. Jaehyun looks at your receding figure and finds himself checking you out, the largest blow he’s taken to his dignity. He shakes his head, breathing in and out. This is so not like him. He’s supposed to be the suave, handsome guy who people can’t seem to get to and yet—yet, you do it so easily. It’s unfair. He swallows his heart and tells himself he’s too old to feel this way. He’ll just drown himself in work and pretend love is a commodity like everyone else with a corporate job is supposed to. 
“You know,” Soojin starts when you get back. “Jaehyun kind of looks high if you look at him long enough. Weed is illegal though but who knows? Maybe he’s a bad boy deep down after all.”
“Which rumour have you been paying attention to now?” You sigh deeply.
Soojin laughs. “It’s funny to hear everyone’s opinions. Even if most of them turn into scandalous tall tales.”
“Anyway,” she continues. “I’m clocking out. I’ll get Jaehyun to take you to the sake bar.”
You look at her, puzzled.
“You’re a matching set now,” she follows up and you groan.
“Don’t give me that cr—”
“Toodle-oo! Let’s have some fun before we’re grey and old, eh?”
You sigh and nod. Maybe you should look into a caffeine fix, even if it costs you a mental power outage at the end of the rush. It’s not like you to be so down on a Friday but alas, Fate is as miserable a woman as you are. The sake bar is starting to sound good.
Or, you could always watch a few ASMR cooking videos instead of staring blankly at the employee records. Either way, this Friday better improve by tonight.
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“This is going great,” Soojin says, louder than she probably intended after her fourth shot.
“Of course it is,” you mutter. 
You haven’t yet had a chance to drink more because of two reasons: one) Soojin is hogging the alcohol and two) it would be embarrassing to get drunk in front of Jaehyun. Adding to your misery, Soojin has been gushing over her soulmate and the way she always makes breakfast for Soojin, listing off every single recipe she’s made. You would love to listen but you’re a tiny bit past your limit.
“Wooh, Jaehyun, you look hot,” Soojin whistles, in more of an older sister manner. “I can almost see your tattoo. Why don’t the two of you show us at the same time and we can take a commemorative picture?”
You cough loudly. “Mine’s on my waist, Soojin. I’m not ready to expose skin.”
“Right. Sorry.” She turns back at lightning speed to bother Dongmin with her stories, who smiles at her politely. It seems so genuine that you’re slightly enamored with it for a moment. There’s Jungwoo from marketing beside him, some more HR employees and thankfully, no interns. Doyoung is the only one partly miserable in the lot, talking into the phone for half an hour now. 
“Shit.” Jaehyun nudges you and whispers, “I forgot about the tattoo. This T-shirt makes it very visible.”
You look at him, alarmed. You fix his jacket, startling him, and pull the zipper all the way to his neck, making sure to backhand him on the chin.
“There.”
“It’s hot in here.”
“What do you want me to do about it? God, you’re like a child.”
“I’m like a—okay. Just cover my tattoo with foundation or something.”
“You think I carry around a whole bottle of foundation?”
Jaehyun blinks, deeming it safer to keep his mouth shut. 
“Okay. Fine. I have an idea. Come to the washroom with me.”
“Oh my, this isn’t your making out in the corner type of thing, right?”
You glare at him and he shuts up, following you quietly to the surprisingly clean restroom. The fact that it isn’t gendered makes you very glad. You make Jaehyun sit on the low enough basin counter and push your knee against it to balance yourself as you take out a permanent marker from your bag.
“I hope Doyoung doesn’t fire me for sneaking away,” you mutter angrily. “He didn’t even make me receive his calls all day.”
Jaehyun scoffs lightly. “Please, Doyoung adores you and your work ethic. He talks about it more than what I need to overhear. That and Taeyong’s detailed aquarium maintenance rules.”
“He does?”
Jaehyun clears his throat and you hold back bombing him with more questions till you’re done with painting an arrow into his tattoo.
“Isn’t it weird?” He looks at you with round, curious eyes. “Yours is a heart. Mine’s a pierced heart.”
“Hm. Funny coincidence.”
“Do you have to sit on my lap for this?”
“I’m not sitting on your lap,” you hiss. You are kind of close. You train your eyes on his collarbone as you pull his neckline down. 
It would be so embarrassing to be caught like this. You’d rather be caught making out with someone in the broom closet. You hold back a pained sigh. Jaehyun has some nerve speaking to you when you’re already annoyed with him. Couldn’t he just have worn his business attire? Why does he get to go home early? Taeyong is far too lenient a boss. You start swearing internally, getting nervous when you think about the consequences of your actions.
“Has anyone ever filed a complaint against you?” Jaehyun asks, and you nudge his chin upwards to draw the line on his tattoo.
“For what? Being perfect and successful?”
“For that attitude. The ‘take what I want’ attitude.”
You roll your eyes. “No. You’re saying it like I’m awful to the core for trying to take what I want. I haven’t got such a bad soul, you know, as souls go. You wouldn't write articles about how good a soul it is but… it’s well enough.”
Jaehyun raises an eyebrow and you avert your gaze from his eyes. This sort of proximity shouldn’t be bothering you, you shouldn’t be rambling.
The door opens right then and in a fit of panic, you do the unthinkable. You press your lips to Jaehyun’s and pray that whoever walked in has no idea who you are and more importantly, can’t see the permanent marker in your hand. 
“I’m so sorry!”
You know that voice. You half regret it when you hear it. Dongmin exits the bathroom as quickly as he entered and you pull away to look at the empty space. Beside you, Jaehyun stays so still that you forget he’s there for a moment. You breathe out in relief though part of you still feels a heavy ounce of regret.
You turn back to Jaehyun and find his doe eyes soft and lost in thought.
“I get it now,” Jaehyun whispers. “It must hurt. That he doesn’t care about the system.”
“What are you talking about?”
“That he’s so reckless about discarding you.”
You separate yourself from him further, standing up and brushing your clothes. “You’re overstepping.”
“Sorry,” he responds quietly. 
There’s a pause.
“Did you just kiss me right now?”
“Shut up. I didn’t want him to see us and especially this.” You wave the marker in front of his face.
“You just kissed me in a fit of panic. That’s the first time I’ve seen someone respond to panic this way.” Jaehyun looks a little too smug.
“What are you implying?” 
“You wanted to kiss me.”
You scoff. “Don’t get too ahead of yourself.” 
You want to knock the smile right off his face but you stick to flicking his forehead, his yell of surprise satisfying. This Friday night was supposed to get better. In fact, you are going to make it better if life won’t. The soju won’t drink itself and you deem that Soojin has had enough. 
Ignoring Dongmin’s confused look, you order far too many soju shots to be considered healthy. As you promised yourself, you are going to make this Friday better.
//
You just had to go and get drunk. Jaehyun stares at you, blinking slowly and wondering just how much you can embarrass yourself before it becomes a burden for him. He has to get you home; you’re practically a matching set now. But are the halves of a pair supposed to take care of the other when they get drunk?
“You know what, guys?” You announce, standing up abruptly and immediately getting pulled back to your seat by Jaehyun. It doesn’t stop your mouth however.
“I hate the stupid system,” you continue. “To tell the truth—”
He smacks his hand over your mouth. Jaehyun has had enough of the silent mini heart attacks you give him. The rest look at him with puzzled looks and he can’t even bring himself to give them a polite smile before dragging you out of the bar. The night breeze is cold enough—maybe it’ll sober you up.
"You're so annoying, Jaehyun," you mutter, massaging your forehead. "Did you know that?"
Or maybe it won’t.
"Never heard that before."
"How do you always keep to yourself and still be the center of attention?" You cling to his arm for balance. 
"Have you considered that maybe a polite man isn't as scheming as you think he is?"
You curl your lips. "Stop using big sentences. I hate that I barely know you, and I know everyone."
Jaehyun purses his lips. "You just enjoy the power that comes with figuring people out. Don't you?"
"Whatever you say. I want life to be a nice and smooth ride but then again, I can't even face my soulmate." You let out an airy laugh. "I didn't really need one though."
Jaehyun laughs in disbelief. "You look like you're dying of loneliness."
"Ooh, that's a big claim, Yoonoh."
"You say I keep to myself but what about you? You like hiding, don't you?"
You laugh. "Is this the part where I say we're nothing alike?"
He purses his lips, shaking his head in dismissal. He's just tired of chit-chat with someone who smells like she robbed a liquor store in Itaewon.
“You must think I’m some sort of selfish, vapid, work-obsessed overachiever,” you continue, tilting your head with a blank look in your eyes.
“Well, not exac—”
“But guess what? Your opinions are invalid, Jung Yoonoh. You’re just some chump from marketing. A very good-looking chump but still.”
Jaehyun swears under his breath as you fling your arms open in the same manner a speech-giving patriot fighting for freedom would. Unfortunately, the freedom struggle is private in this day and age, and you just smacked him in the nose instead.
You sigh deeply and he looks at you again, warily now as he holds his nose.
“You’re not exactly wrong either. I’m so empty. Like a bottle of soju with no soju. Could you bring me some?”
Jaehyun massages his temples and solidifies his resolve. He’s had enough stares from people on the sidewalk. With delicate concern, he holds you up with one arm around your waist, balancing your weight evenly so you can stand. Promptly, you bury your face into his neck and an embarrassing, high-pitched squeak evades the filter of his mouth. You’re just so adept at making his days (and nights) worse.
Jaehyun tries his best to carry you to the parking lot without any signs of struggle but good lord, are you uncooperative. Once he’s down lugging you to the passenger seat, he breathes out in relief at long last and makes sure you don’t fold in over yourself dozing off the seat. Getting you to sit up, he finds himself smiling the slightest bit at your smudged lipstick. Even like this, you’re quite pretty. 
Realizing what thought came over him, he shakes his head vigorously as if he’s committing a horrible crime. He just has to get you home—Soojin had texted him the address prior to the outing just in case—and then he can go back to pretending whatever he even is supposed to.
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The sports event is really just HR and Management trying to one-up the other in a more quantitative way. You’re not really fond of the sweat and heavy breathing that comes with physical exertion if it’s for the sake of competition. Competition is such a childish, masculine way of handling things, especially emotions.
HR is leading in wins, however and that means you have something to rub in Jaehyun’s face. You hate participating but you’re not allowed to opt out without a medical certificate. At least one competition, and you had to choose the three-legged race. All these potential partners, and Dongmin had to choose you.
“I’ll win,” you tell Jaehyun, stopping by him once you exit the changing room. The indoor stadium is usually a recreational facility for senior employees but on sports day, it’s closer to a gladiator arena. The seats are green and occupied by grinning employees, most of them glad for a day off but also upset they don’t get to attend their personal affairs in it.
Jaehyun stops himself from rolling his eyes. “Shouldn’t it be a ‘we’? You need a partner. Oh, are you sad you can’t pick me?”
“Not at all.” You cross your arms, annoyed at his mock pity. 
Right then, Dongmin jogs up to you in a blue tracksuit. His hair sticks to his forehead because unlike you, he takes sports very seriously. Jaehyun, on the other hand, just seems to enjoy the competition. As a guilty pleasure, you’d like to see the two of them compete one day. That would be a competition worth betting on.
“I’ll have to borrow your soulmate.” Dongmin laughs. “The race is starting.”
Life strikes again with its poorly timed irony.
“Don’t mind me,” Jaehyun says politely.
The race is easier than you thought it would be considering most of the other employees struggle with teamwork. You’re the HR team for a reason. But then again, you feel a certain hollowness pervade you while you’re pressed to Dongmin’s side. Wouldn’t it be nice?
All you can think is that Dongmin and you are perfectly in sync. The realization comes off as sad despite your victory and the wide grins on both of your faces. 
Jaehyun purses his lips and gives the two of you a nonchalant look. He’s avoided getting caught in the changing room quite well. For some reason, he’s glad that you’re winning but also dissatisfied about it. He would certainly feel different if he were participating in that race, wouldn’t he? He would win. Losing a competition is a huge blow to his ego. Lately, he seems to be losing a lot of races. The two of you have been growing closer and he doesn’t mind late night discussions about flawed systems and childhood memories; but the fact that you’re growing on him is something for him to be on edge about. He’s never felt so close to someone, and still so far.
“Oh, they have good chemistry, don’t they?” Doyoung comments beside Jaehyun, before taking a sip from his bottle.
“What chemistry?” Jaehyun snaps and Doyoung almost chokes on the water.
“Chill out, man.” Doyoung eyes Jaehyun’s figure in concern. “She’s like officially yours.”
Jaehyun refuses in a series of sputtering responses. “That’s not what I meant. I’m not jealous. I’m not that kind of man.”
“I didn’t paint you as that kind of man either,” Doyoung mutters before speaking up. “But love, Jaehyun. Love’s a weird thing.”
Jaehyunn ignores his comment and walks down to the grounds, jogging up to you. He immediately forgets to say anything at all. Smooth move, Yoonoh.
You just stick out your tongue at him subtly.
“I told you we’d win,” you say.
Jaehyun crosses his arms. “Congratulations. I thought you, quote, hate this stupid competition for dunces.”
You clear your throat and Dongmin laughs beside you. Before he can offer his bottle, Jaehyun offers his own in a rush. You raise an eyebrow but don’t question it.
“You guys really are a perfect pair.” Dongmin laughs. “Sometimes I wish Mijoo was my soulmate.”
You give him a pitiful smile. There go your happy feelings of victory.
“But I’m happy this way.” Dongmin nudges your shoulder with his. “Don’t give me that look.”
That is not the look he thinks you were giving. You smile. 
“What about this? We can go on a double date! Those are fun, right?” Dongmin muses, crossing his arms.
“No,” you and Jaehyun refuse in a panic, and Dongmin blinks in confusion at the overwhelming response.
“I'm more of a homebody,” you explain.
“Yeah, me too,” Jaehyun agrees.
It makes Dongmin laugh aloud. “Oh, fate didn’t go wrong with the two of you.”
Your smile wavers. Did it go so wrong with you and Dongmin? Jaehyun’s hand brushes yours and you look at him. A perfect side profile and flushed hot cheeks with dimples to die for. You wouldn’t mind being in love with him. You don’t mind love much at all. 
Shaking off the thought, you watch as Dongmin leaves the two of you to run to the changing rooms. Eyeing Jaehyun’s red team sweatshirt with “Management” in big typography over the chest, you look back up to his face. 
“Why did you jog over here so desperately?” You wiggle your eyebrows. “Jealous?”
“Yes. I am irreparably in love with you.”
He leans in quickly and you flinch, making his dimples show up.
“Asshole,” you curse. “I’ll file you for harassment. Don’t do that again.”
“Isn’t it harassment when you feel me up while you draw—” Jaehyun leans in to whisper. “—the soulmark?” 
“I would never have my hands near your greasy existence if I could,” you huff, scandalized. 
But the thing is, Jaehyun is getting better at this game of flustering each other and you don’t like it one bit.
“Hey, you know Dongmin’s girlfriend?” he asks suddenly. 
You nod. “Kind of. I’ve seen her pictures on Instagram.”
Jaehyun pauses before humming in realization.
You cough. “Not that I was stalking them or something. Obviously.”
Jaehyun gives you a knowing smile but doesn’t question anything, much to your aggravation. It would’ve been better if you had a chance to prove you weren’t stalking them but then again, that is exactly what you were doing.
“Well, we went to the same college. Same major too.”
“Are you serious? Wait, how do you know? Does this mean you stalked their Instagram too?”
“Too?”
“Shut up.”
There’s a beat of silence. 
“She’s not exactly the evil homewrecker type,” he says.
“I know that,” you snap. If anything, you feel like the evil homewrecker even if Dongmin’s supposed to be your soulmate.
They’re so reckless. Jaehyun was right—you do blame them in a way. They don’t care who they trample under their nauseating parade of romance. But then again, that parade is better than a personal rejection.
“I’m just saying… don't hold it against them.”
“I don’t remember asking for advice, Jung Yoonoh.”
Jaehyun shrugs, dropping the issue. The preparations for the next race is starting and it has something to do with passing balls from basket to basket—you get bored already when you see Doyoung stretch before shaking hands with Taeyong.
“Wanna get ice-cream? We funded the food truck this year.” Jaehyun looks expectantly at you.
“Sure.” 
You contemplate holding his hand for a moment but let that thought bury itself. You don’t have to pretend right now. 
Much to your despair (or delight) however, Jaehyun takes your hand absentmindedly as he walks towards the exit. It’s not that you’ve never held hands before, it’s just that Jaehyun’s skin is soft against yours.
“I can’t believe you and Mijoo were in the same course.”
It seems she’s ahead of you in every direction you look to tread on. Of course, you will not be telling Jaehyun that. You don’t exactly feel jealousy—can’t feel jealousy when your life is perfect as it is. And for Jaehyun? You hate to admit it but you’d trade places with Mijoo any day.
“Well, she didn’t really like socializing back then so I didn’t know we were in the same program either.”
You chuckle, glancing down at your intertwined fingers despite your best efforts. It feels nice like this. It feels nice to be wanted by someone—even if it’s a lie.
“Do you think- Do you think they’re brave?” You ask. “They didn’t even hesitate to disregard the system.”
“I think people in love are always brave.”
You hum, looking down at your feet. All the more reason the system fucked up. You were never even supposed to be partnered up. You’re not brave—the face you put on is. The idea of love seems to get further and further away from you.
Just then, Jaehyun tugs at your hand, walking slightly faster and making you complain as you jog to catch up with his long strides. The food truck is fairly large, on the street outside to the stadium entrance. February is catching up with its heat and you curse at global warming for this hot winter day.
“You can take up to five scoops of different flavours,” he informs you, grinning sheepishly. “I guess the cups aren’t large enough for beyond that.”
“I didn’t know you were this passionate about ice-cream,” you say.
“Sicheng rubbed off on me.”
You laugh. IT must have given Sicheng enough stress to develop a sweet tooth. You love the HR Department when you look at the others in your company.
Jaehyun has a nice smile. You don’t know why you think that but you do and now you can’t focus on anything apart from the pink dust sprinkled over his cheeks and the handsome dimples that accompany. You don’t want to stare but clearly, Jaehyun must have been blessed by some divide being if not for fate. Maybe he’s a mess up like you. As far as you know, his soulmate doesn’t exist. That little red heart is so simple that none of the soulmate designs match it.
A rather repulsing part of you is happy about it. You like the feel of Jaehyun’s hands. You like the way he looks at you. You wouldn’t mind it if he were yours.  
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Jaehyun’s house is as cosy as his mother makes you feel. It’s been a while since you’ve been home and if you were perhaps less emotionally constipated, you would have tears welling up in your eyes. There’s quite a few relatives too but then again, every Asian family jumps at the chance to celebrate something as mediocre as engagements and marriage and soulmate findings. Apparently, hormones are perfectly fine to them once you’re not teenagers anymore.
This isn’t so bad. What was so scary about meeting parents again? Jaehyun’s dad did challenge you with a questionnaire but lucky for you, you know exactly how interviews work. You’ve got enough information on Jaehyun from the man himself for this visit. The briefing he gave you was boring though; you already know what you need to know about Jaehyun.
You sit at the table, while most of the other guests work in the kitchen. Jaehyun’s mother asks you questions about your life, friendly and welcoming in every way possible. Mothers are truly god-sent. You wonder how she produced someone as far from divine as Jaehyun. (Except in looks, perhaps.)
You say that out loud and get a sharp quip from Jaehyun, his mother’s eyes lighting up at your childish interaction.
“Oh my, fate is never wrong!” She remarks with a wide smile. “I’ve never seen Jaehyun open up so much with anyone before. He was such a shy boy in school, you know? All the girls would send letters and confessions and he would just turn red in the face.”
“Mom.” He smiles all too sweet at her but you can see the panic in his eyes.
She rolls her eyes before turning to you. “Darling, you have no idea how proud I feel to see him this at ease. I was honestly getting tired of all the ‘your son is so polite and well-mannered’ comments. Some bickering ought to do him good.”
“Mom,” he repeats, straightening. “I think auntie needs some help setting up the table.”
“Don’t shoo me away yet. I have to tell (name) about the time you were elected class representative in middle school. And all those sports and acting awards.”
“You don’t have to advertise me, Mom,” he says, dropping his face into his hands to rub at his eyes, already growing tired. “I’m already- I’m already hers.”
His mother coos and apart from the expected deep red flush on Jaehyun’s skin, you find yourself feeling hot in the face too. Jaehyun’s aunt calls for his mother right then and you watch as she makes her way to the kitchen entrance, the two women glancing at you and giggling to each other over some shared words.
Jaehyun takes the opportunity to grab your hand and walk away to a more obscure part of the house upstairs. With significantly less relatives, it should be a good hiding spot unless discovered by his giggling cousins that he refuses to introduce you to. 
“Aw, what a shy baby,” you coo, smiling at the thought of a younger, easily-flustered Jaehyun.
His ears are bright red and you think that he’s still easily flustered. He just doesn’t show it much anymore—there’s only one dead giveaway.
“Forget everything my mom said,” he instructs. “It’s not important information.”
“Oh, no, darling. Your mother is a gold mine of vital information. You know what? I’m going to go chat her up right now. I’m sure you were quite the teenage dream I should know about.”
Jaehyun grips your wrist before you can escape, pulling your closer.
“Don’t.”
You don’t know if it’s the proximity or the fact that there are most definitely a few family members that could walk in right now—but you find yourself embarrassed as you look at his face. It’s very pleasant, handsome even, and the strands of his hair look irresistibly soft from this distance. You reach your hand out and brush the hair out of his eyes, almost instinctively. 
“You have nice eyes, Jaehyun,” you say out loud, not sure why. He doesn’t fluster this time but it makes you all the more aware of your nearness.
Your eyes glance at the bottom of the staircase to see a little girl, around nine, hiding from behind the wall that separates the dining room and the kitchen. You return your gaze to Jaehyun with a smirk.
"We should kiss right now. Your little cousin's watching."
Jaehyun looks mildly disgusted. "Why would I want to kiss you in front of my cousin?"
You roll your eyes. “You don't get it, do you? The fastest way to convince a family is through rumours.”
Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. "So?"
"Oh my god, you're an idiot. Nosy cousins are the most effective way to spread rumours."
"Ah." Jaehyun looks enlightened enough for you to continue.
"Okay, but first you need to have these mints." You take out the emergency mints from your purse.
"What? I don't need mints. I have nice smelling breath.”
"Everyone needs mints, Jaehyun. Especially men."
Jaehyun sighs heavily. You take the opportunity to grab his wrist and pull him into a corner. 
"Have this mint or else."
You hold his face between your thumb and forefingers, cheeks squishing under the pressure as you force a mint in. He lets you do it for some reason, looking lost as he gazes at you. 
You raise an eyebrow. "Oh my, you're enjoying this. Pervert."
"Wha—what? You have to stop thinking you're hot shit, oh my god. I just got distracted for a bit."
"By me, right?"
"No! I just zoned ou—you're enjoying this."
You bite down your smile but a giggle escapes you anyway. Jaehyun rolls his eyes though he smiles, looking far too close to irresistible when his dimples show.
"You can't keep teasing me," he says, voice low.
"I've been doing it for two years. I'm pretty sure I can do it for at least two more."
Jaehyun scoffs, laughing at your statement. "You know what? I'm going to get back at you from now on. I've been so lenient."
You snort before pressing the back of your fingers to your nose. "You? You're going to get back at me? You’re good at lip service, Jaehyun."
“Huh. You might be right about that.”
There's a beat of silence and you look at him expectantly. In the next beat of your heart (or lack thereof), he cups your cheeks and presses his lips to yours, surprising the life out of you as your back hits the wall. It's not just a touch either, his mouth moves over yours and when your knees feel weak, you reluctantly admit that the rumour about Jung Yoonoh being a good kisser is true. Maybe his body count isn't a lower-end single digit after all.
He pulls apart with a short smile tugging at his lips. "Satisfied?"
You sputter out a response before clearing your throat. “I- I don’t think anyone really saw us in this corner.”
Jaehyun makes a low humming sound. “Or you could just say you want me to kiss you again? I know I’m a good kisser.”
“Fuck off.” You punch his chest, eliciting a quiet grunt from him.
You move away from him, peeking from behind the wall. Oh, she saw it alright. The giggling gives it away and the fact that a few more younger cousins have gathered. This is ridiculous. The fact that you wouldn’t mind more is even worse.
You turn back to Jaehyun with steel-set eyes. “No more kissing. Ever. Never again. Kissing is officially banned.”
Jaehyun looks perplexed. “I thought that was a good kiss. Did you not enjoy it? What do you mean no kissing?”
“And I take it back.” The heat on your face is still burning steadily. 
“Oh, I see. You liked it so much that you’re embarrassed.”
“You’re such a pain in the ass.”
“So I’m right?”
You roll your eyes and quickly walk down the stairs, a few words of complaint left hanging in the air as Jaehyun follows behind, stumbling over the steps.
Jaehyun likes how comfortable this is. He doesn’t mind glaring daggers at each other but this is fun too. It’s like he doesn’t have to be careful about the lines he might be crossing—there aren’t any damn lines at all. He can’t call it love, at least not by definition, but something is there. Something that is solid enough and heavy enough. Something he would be ready to hold on to.
You laugh at a joke Jaehyun’s dad makes. A family is the only place to feel at home. It might not be yours but maybe at the end of the night, you can convince them to disown Jaehyun and adopt you as their child instead. His cousins seem to be interested in the same things you were as a high schooler and it surprised you. Your job lets you advise the older cousins in a fairly friendly fashion. The little ones seem to like your dress and you find them far too adorable with their pink cheeks and dimples, much like Jaehyun’s. Speaking of which, he definitely got them from his dad. You look around and wonder how Jaehyun has so many female cousins and not an inkling about how women work. 
It doesn’t hurt anymore that Dongmin discarded you so recklessly.
He’s wrong. Jaehyun’s wrong. It doesn’t hurt—didn’t hurt right now at the very least. When Jaehyun kissed you, you didn’t think of Dongmin or his girlfriend or anyone else. You thought that Jaehyun’s skin is somehow always the right temperature. 
You shake your head. Jaehyun drives your getaway car and you shouldn’t get too comfortable in its worn-out leather seats. This shouldn’t be any different to you; you aren’t supposed to find love in every corner. This was all a survival instinct. 
The more stories Jaehyun’s mother shares with you over dinner, the more you find it comfortable to be here. You don’t feel this welcome in your own apartment (although, there isn’t exactly anyone else living there but you and the goddamn pigeon that wakes you up at six in the morning). The more the night progresses, the more you want to believe in this lie. Jaehyun glances at you from time to time, his gaze neither uncomfortable nor harsh and you smile at him when he does. Right now, there is no loneliness and the air is warm and smells of freshly cooked food; the way familial love works is such a mystery. You feel content.
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“Why are we doing this again?” you lean in and ask Jaehyun, eyes focused on the TV as he tries to fix it.
“Because I need to get out of work, and fulfilled soulmates get a day off on Valentine’s day.”
You nod. “Your apartment kind of stinks. I feel sorry for Sicheng.”
“This is clean,” he defends, pointing at the lack of any visible mess in his room. His work table, however, has too many items scattered over it to be called neat. There’s a fairly large TV attached to the wall and you’re a little jealous about it. You only ever watch shows on your (quite beloved albeit small) laptop. The blinds aren’t fully closed, the evening city lights trying their best to pry their pervasive fingers in and add something more to the peach hue of Jaehyun’s room.
The doorbell rings just in estimated time for food delivery, a sigh leaving your mouth along with a ‘finally’. His place is strangely comfortable and much less of the war zone that you expected. There’s no reason to feel awkward, really, or even the bubbling in your stomach. You’re not seventeen, in your crush’s house. Jaehyun isn’t even someone you like that way.
It’s just two friends hanging out and watching a movie and doing other friendly activities. Two friends hanging out on Valentine's day. Two friends who have kissed more than once.
What do lovers do anyway?
This thing with Jaehyun has turned into clandestine smiles at the office building, subtle texts of ‘did you eat?’ and ‘good morning, idiot’, racing hearts at brushing hands on the occasional off-work hangouts (you refuse to call them “dates”) and overall, a lot more pink hearts floating over his head when you see him. It’s positively appalling. 
You don’t mind it one bit.
“Happy Valentine’s Day!” The delivery man wishes as he leaves and you feel a sudden rage bubble up in you. 
“Ah, does he think every couple celebrates Valentine’s day? And just because we’re in the same apartment means we’re a couple? Wow.” You cross your arms, scoffing. “Who’s he to wish me?”
“Why… Why are you getting mad?” Jaehyun asks quietly, slightly confused.
You glare at him, your anger not quite dissipated and walk back into his room, placing the box of confectionaries on the bedside table with a loud thud. Jaehyun follows, placing the drinks rather clumsily beside it. He gives you one last look of concern before settling down on his bed.
You let out another huff of complaint.
"Does everything have to be heart-shaped?"
You stare at the nauseating display of baked goods delivered in a pretty heart-shaped box. The brownie is in a clear plastic box that has a tiny bouquet of hearts atop it, the coffee cups have heart stickers around the rim, and the pastry itself is heart-shaped or rather, two halves of a heart. One of them is strawberry pink and the other chocolate brown.
“You seem… suddenly fired up,” Jaehyun comments quietly.
You don’t really care if you look crazy to him right now; he’s already seen the worse parts of you. You’re just so annoyed at all this red and pink that was delivered. Aren’t cafes supposed to stick with that beige-cream palette? 
While you contemplate, Jaehyun tears the little sugar packet and attempts to open the lid of the cup at the same time, your blood pressure rising at the sight because you were half sure he’d spill the drink. After much difficulty, he shakes the packet trying to get just enough sugar but of course, like the clumsy oaf he is, he misses almost entirely, spilling sugar over his coffee table. It’s oddly endearing but that’s a thought you’ll keep to yourself.
He turns to you with a sheepish grin and you give him a look of distaste.
“You are a sorry excuse of a person, Jaehyun.”
“Look me in the eye and tell me you wouldn’t mess this up.”
You turn to look him in the eyes, the honey shade alluring under warm apartment lights. They really are pretty. 
“I, and every other sane human being, would not mess up adding sugar to a cup of coffee.”
“You faltered for a moment there.”
That was not the reason you faltered. You roll your eyes and look away, taking a sip of your drink and sighing at the taste.
“How do you even like Americanos? Don’t you like a bit of cream and sweetness?”
 “I don’t really care for bitterness,” he answers.
“Wow, you must be a masochist.”
“And it’s quite obvious you’re a sadist.”
You snicker. “That makes us quite the pair.”
“I would like that sentence in a non-BDSM context, thank you.”
Jaehyun turns on the TV and the Netflix logo animation pops up. You raise an eyebrow at his ‘Continue Watching’ list, eyeing Bridegerton and Sweet Home, and wondering if he could be any more of an enigma. You can’t possibly figure him out at this point. You groan when he picks a title.
“Ugh. Do we have to watch a romantic comedy?”
“What? They’re funny. And I thought you liked those 2000’s movies.”
You believed in unicorns and sock goblins and love back then too. These days, you hate to see other people in love, especially when it’s fake. The movies you loved are now the movies you hate. The couples you eyed with delight at parks and cafes are now the bane of your existence. In fact, you’d go as far as to say that you enjoy the digital fireworks from a couple having a massive online breakup. Things falling apart are entertaining when it’s not happening to you.
You purse your lips. Can't you see other people happy without wanting to tear it down for yourself?
“Fine. But I’ll pick the 2000’s romcom.”
Jaehyun shrugs and hands over the remote. You see Sandra Bullock and Ryan Reynolds on the poster and click on it immediately. The Proposal has a good enough comedy to romance ratio, in your opinion.
“I’m kind of surprised you came,” he says quietly.
“Why?” You raise an eyebrow. “Is it because of the suggestive nature of visiting someone’s apartment on Valentine’s day? Did you think we’d be doing something… more fun?”
You lean in and bat your eyelashes suggestively, although you’re clearly joking.
“I think you should know better than to get mouthy with me,” he answers as he leans in further, making your heartbeat hike at the proximity. Maybe he’s figured you out. Wouldn’t it be so nice to figure each other out at the same time—like puzzle pieces fitting together?
You move away from him. “Well, it’s not like I can go anywhere else. And I didn’t want to stay in my own apartment.”
“Maybe you enjoy my company?”
“Look, I would be sipping my coffee at a perfectly aesthetic cafe if it weren’t Valentine’s day.”
He raises an eyebrow at your nonsensical declaration and you sigh, trying to explain yourself.
“Cafes just terrorize the single folk on Valentine’s day. You should always go with Netflix,” you say.
“And chill?”
“Do you even know what that means?”
“As I’ve told you so many times, I am not stupid.”
You inhale, an idea presenting itself.  
“Hey, since we’re technically a couple, shouldn’t you be sharing your Netflix password with me?” you ask, pressing your lips into your cutest smile.
“No.”
“You’re so stingy,” you mutter. It was worth a shot.
Jaehyun laughs, your hand reaching out to poke his dimples but you stop yourself. You weren’t supposed to get this comfortable. This wasn’t your place to be. Lost in thought, the moving screen leaves you unfazed and you can’t look at him anymore. However, Jaehyun reaches out right then and wipes at the space beside your lips, your focus lifting from the beginning scenes of The Proposal and latching onto Jaehyun’s lips.
There’s a pause, your head clearing itself of thoughts when you make eye contact with him. Soft hair, doe eyes, full lips and dimples—he’s so damn attractive, it hurts your existence. Does he have to be this close to you? You have mixed feelings about that look in his eyes.
“Can I kiss you?” he whispers suddenly.
“Yes,” you answer.
If you look from a rational point of view, you should not have said that. You should have said anything but that. But you don’t want to think right now. Jaehyun’s touch is warm over your skin as his hand rests under your jaw and the other on your waist.
You should not have said that. But you feel loved.
Somewhere along, you find yourself parting only to kiss again, the feeling of skin so delightful in a way you’ve never experienced. Your shirt hikes up and you see Jaehyun eye the little heart with the arrow—the sign you so despised with a gentle smile.
“It’s pretty,” he whispers.
It’s pretty but it isn’t his. He doesn’t have to look at you like that—he’s come a long way from nervous glances and now he’s the one making you nervous. Just say it isn’t love and it will be alright.
You part, sobering up for a moment and you disentangle your limbs to sit at the side of his bed.
“What’s- What’s wrong?” Jaehyun whispers.
You exhale.
“All my life, I wait and when it comes, it’s all wrong,” you say, staring at your lap. Self-pity is the most disgusting kind of pity to feel. You’re past crying at things like this. You’re past crying for an ounce of romance, every time you listen to a love song on the radio or look at an Instagram post of a couple or pass by lovers on the sidewalk content with each other. You don’t even have cats to return home to. Modern loneliness is wearing you down but you can’t believe in fairytales anymore.
He scoffs, smiling bitterly. “I don’t even know if this is worth losing my dignity over.”
“Jaehyun—”
“We can’t pretend anymore—I can’t pretend anymore,” Jaehyun exhales. “I want you enough to forget the system. Give me an answer. Please.”
You don’t mind forgetting the system right now. Jaehyun’s lips are always the right temperature; the warmth of his body seeps through his shirt as you press yourself to him in a hug. He’s perfect and right now, you want to believe he’s perfect for you—even if he isn’t, you want to believe it into existence.
You cup Jaehyun’s cheeks, unsaid emotion in his doe eyes, and kiss him. This time, you mean it with every ounce of your being. There’s no more flustering each other, just the hot flush of intimacy when you feel skin that doesn’t burn you. It’s just the right feeling. There’s no way this can be wrong. 
Aren’t you getting ahead of yourself? You wish the voice would pipe down. It’s a coward, fearing fate just as everyone else does. But you are better than that, and this feeling is too enjoyable to let go. You don’t want this to fade.
Just then, Dongmin’s face comes to mind and you think that maybe if you kiss someone else with all you have, you don’t have to think of your shortcomings ever again.
Jaehyun pulls apart and you miss the warmth.
“You’re not… You’re not thinking of me, are you?” he asks. 
You don’t answer, even if the silence is overwhelming.
“I’d rather not have you close your eyes and think of someone else when I’m in front of you.”
“I’m sorry” is all you can say.
“You can at least pretend to love me.” His voice is a hoarse whisper. “Could. It’s not like this was ever supposed to work out.”
You gulp, looking away. “Jaehyun, come on. That’s not like you. We were- we were just… having fun.”
He takes a deep breath. “It hurts to not be wanted by someone you want. You know that. So why are you doing this to me?”
Because misery likes company.
“I’m sorry.”
It seems the phrase you barely uttered when you were younger is tumbling out of your lips in a mixture of grief and pity. Perhaps it’s karma. Perhaps it’s fate. Perhaps it’s just the consequences of your mistakes.
Jaehyun parts his lips, a sigh departing. He leans in again, pushing away all of his thoughts. A little more hurt won't kill him tonight. How and when did you bring him down to his knees?
However, he's stopped by your hands against his shoulders, his lips hovering over yours.
"Let's stop," you say. "You're right."
"Isn't this what you wanted?"
“I don’t- I don’t know. I don’t know anymore.”
You wish you could be brave enough to burn the instruction pamphlet from destiny. But right now, you need to get away from Jaehyun, away from any more misery business.
“I’ll get going,” you say, gathering your stuff. 
Jaehyun hesitates but doesn’t stop you. He would never stop you, can’t stop so how could he even dream of stopping fate? This can never work out. It felt right in the moment but you don’t know anything more than that. You can’t close your eyes and pray everything disappears. No one else will solve your problems for you, you know that.
It’s time you start fixing the mess you made. You leave with a polite goodbye and hear a loud sigh behind you once the door is closed. Blinking away the urge to walk back in, you take long and quick strides to the elevator. You’re going to fix this.
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Maybe if Lady Gaga’s ‘Poker Face’ wasn’t blasting at full volume at this stupid office party, you could be thinking a little straighter.
He was right. You can’t pretend anymore. There were thousands of ways this could have gone better. You didn’t have to pretend to be soulmates when you’re not. You could’ve discarded your belief in the whole system like Dongmin and Mijoo and dated someone out of spite. You didn’t have to drag Jaehyun into your sorry mess. You need to take out the nail you hammered into your own foot.
It’s the first time you’ve visited the rooftop restaurant from the company’s subsidiary chain of high-end restaurants but you imagined it would be bigger. It’s the news’ fault for making this place seem like a football field. However, you might be feeling that way because the distance between you and Jaehyun is suffocatingly small as is the distance with Dongmin. You don’t need to see Jaehyun tonight.
You don’t intend to make your confession a public affair and you certainly don’t believe in tack things like atonement. However, improvement begins with a step in the right direction. Maybe you’ll be a better person after this. Maybe you’ll still be as annoying and pushy as ever. You need to get it off your chest so you can proceed with the already tedious journey that comes with a soulmate rejection. You wonder why there’s so many man-made laws about soulmates when fate has made it complicated enough as it is. Love is the same as legalese when it comes to this system.
You flit about the crowds, smiling and greeting people and swerving away from Jaehyun every time he tries to approach you. You’re trying to make a good decision for once. He better not intrude. You’re wearing pink too, for the first time in a while: a satin shirt, pants and blazer set in dull pink.
“Dongmin,” you say, pulling him by the sleeve of his blue tux, and away from the rest of the HR team. “I have to show you something.”
“Hm? Show me?” He blinks at you. 
You get him to follow you to the inside the premises, stopping when you’re far into a 
“Uh?” Dongmin looks around before leaning in to whisper. “You’re not plotting to murder me, are you?”
You blink, and he laughs at you incredulously. “Why are you so serious?”
“I was lying,” you rush. “With Jaehyun. He’s not my soulmate. You are.”
Dongmin blinks in confusion. “Are… you joking? That was a weird joke but it could pass as funny—”
“Dongmin.”
You pull out your shirt from your pants, exposing the tattoo on your hip. It’s the little arrowed heart that has been plaguing you for years but now when you look at it, you feel no animosity. After all, it’s been through the same things you have. 
Dongmin’s face falls into stunned silence, eyes fixated on your waist.
“That’s- That’s my—what is this?”
Russian roulette is certainly not the same without a gun.
“I lied, Dongmin,” you answer, fixing your shirt back in. “I was so afraid of your rejection that I made an even larger fool of myself.”
His initial shock seems to have partly subsided.
“You… Why didn’t you tell me?” He looks momentarily hurt.
“You have Mijoo, Dongmin. I can’t ruin something like that.”
A love that doesn’t need fate to fix it.
Dongmin glances away in guilt and sighs, though the sound is croaky. This must be more than what he can take.
“I’m sorry,” he says, haltingly. “I hurt you, didn’t I? When I thought I was being brave, I hurt you instead.”
You smile bitterly. “We all hurt someone, Dongmin. I still have to fix that one for myself.”
He scans your face, lips trembling slightly as unspoken words die on them.
“We’ll tend to the legal stuff later, hm? No compensation. We can file a mutual rejection.”
“But—”
“Shh. I’m happy enough as coworkers and I get paid more than enough for this job. Might get a promotion soon too.”
You wink at him with an added finger gun, trying to play it cool. Despite everything, a weight feels lifted from your shoulders. Now that you are truly alone, you might as well embrace this growing loneliness crawling under your skin. Discomfort could be something you can get used to. 
When you get back to the warmly lit rooftop, the HR team looks at you curiously. You have the most self-destructive thought you’ve had in a while and tell yourself, you might as well if you've come this far. This is it. This is your social death. Honesty is the best policy, unfortunately.
“Dongmin and I have the same soulmate mark,” you announce. “We’re soulmates but we’ll sign a mutual rejection.”
Doyoung looks almost like he’ll faint and Soojin’s mouth is so wide open, you could practice throwing some mini basketballs in. This is your team—almost a second family, and it’s time you stop trying to hide yourself or disguise your feelings as something they’re not. They’ll get over it, as will you.
“J-Jaehyun?” Soojin looks to your side and you turn to find Jaehyun frowning.
“You could’ve discussed this with me,” he says, an odd sound of relief in his laugh. 
It hurts to look at him but you muster up your strength.
“I’m sorry,” you say, facing him. “I didn’t want to drag you into this hell with me.”
Into this loveless hell made for you.
“(name).”
It’s so painfully quiet in this corner; there are so many eyes on you and only the hurt taking shape in Jaehyun’s eyes knock some sense into you. 
“I’ll leave first,” you say, bowing as you take your leave.
You brisk up your pace and exit the venue as quickly as you can and into the building corridor.
Unfortunately for you, you recognize the pair of footsteps that follow you—both of them having their timings wrong. Boys don’t chase after the girl when she’s walking away. Boys should leave a girl alone when she feels like she’s about to cry.
You turn to face two men and groan internally. This is the worst possible situation—you’d rather crawl into a hole than look at either of them. The corporate light shines harshly on either of their faces but the look on them is so earnest, you want to close your eyes and scream. You don’t mind being alone. You were overstepping when you wished you weren’t.
“(name),” Dongmin starts. “I’m sorry it turned out this way. If you’d told me, we could have talked this out.”
A light scoff leaves Jaehyun and Dongmin purses his lips. It’s kind of funny watching both of their tall frames in hesitant postures and you cross your arms. You’re going to deal with this quickly like you always should have. If you’re dealing with fate, you need to have a clear head—and fortune doesn’t favour fools. Being with Jaehyun was nice but he is not yours. Dongmin may have been assigned to you but you’d rather not ruin someone’s relationship.
“What would we have talked about?” you ask. “Compensation charges? Apologies?”
You see a hint of positivity on Jaehyun’s face and turn to face him, frowning.
“And you. Don’t look so smug. You’re the reason I realized this crap. It hurts. Like hell.”
He opens his mouth but no words come when he’s far too taken aback. He can’t offer consolation now, not after everything. You knew this would happen. You would undoubtedly end up wishing you didn’t fall in love with him on the day you leave.
“(name). Listen to me,” Dongmin calls again, voice gentle.
Jaehyun sighs. “We’re both fucking this up, dude.”
Dongmin takes a sharp breath.
“You know, soulmates can be platonic,” he reasons, looking only at you. “People are made for each other differently and maybe you and I—”
“You’re just making her feel worse,” Jaehyun cuts him off.
“How do you know that?” Dongmin asks, finally turning to him. “Because you’ve spent a month or two with her? I’m her soulmate.”
“I think a month or two is much better than a stranger with the same damn birthmark.”
“Oh come on,” Dongmin scoffs. “The system exists for a reason.”
“I don’t give a shit about the system. The same as your girlfriend—oh, sorry, did you forget about her already?”
“It’s not like that.” Dongmin quietens. “We’ll figure something out.”
You pinch the bridge of your nose. They’re worse than you are—honestly, you don’t know what you expected from the timid emotional maturity of men. Both of their polite facades have melted and you’re starting to miss their sweet-tempered work demeanour.
“Come with me,” Dongmin tells you.
He wraps his hand around your wrist and tugs, Jaehyun visibly tensing up at the gesture. He presses his tongue against his cheek in annoyance but refrains from doing anything rash. You feel sorry when you look at him.
“Dongmin,” you whisper. “Can we- can we have a moment?”
Dongmin nods in understanding and exits the hallway to cool off with a few splashes of water in the washroom.
“Would you go with him?” Jaehyun asks, jaw clenched. “An acquaintance as most? Are you willing to run into the arms of fate that you hated so much?”
He looks bitter and you can’t think of a sugar-coated response. You’ll just have to tell him how you feel.
“I need to sort things out, Jaehyun. This—”
You point from him to yourself.
“Couldn’t work out thanks to fate. Dongmin and I will never work out because he’s braver than I am. You know he’s doing all of that just so I don’t get hurt, right? He’s not suddenly in love with me.”
Jaehyun purses his lips, looking down to his feet. Is it so bad that he let jealousy get the best of his mouth? Envy isn’t so awful. He looks from your eyes to lips and wishes he were young enough to believe in fairytales.
“You don’t have to be brave,” he whispers. “You don’t have to be so brave to fall in love. You don’t have to be brave to stay with me.”
“We tried, Jaehyun. And we can’t cheat fate. That, at the very least, requires bravery.” 
You press your lips into a thin line. It hurts. It hurts so bad to look at him and face the consequences of this flawed design. It’s unfair. It’s unfair that you have to follow the rules even after trying your best to break them. 
“You wish you never met me, don’t you?” you whisper. “I made a mess.”
Before he responds, you bow in a short goodbye and walk towards the elevator. There’s no footsteps behind you, no Prince Charming. It’s just you and your high heels clacking against the cold marble as you head back to an empty home. You always thought freedom would feel different, that distance would give you perspective. It just feels awful when no one is around you at all. When you have no one to pick up morning calls from, receive texts from asking if you ate, spend time in peace without uttering a single word—are you free or are you lonely?
The rules state that the two of you are different. It is true. You are as different as love in real life and love in the movies; and neither of them have happy endings now.
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You wish you drank some more last night if you were going to embarrass yourself like that. Thankfully, it’s the weekend and you have two more days to figure out how to face your coworkers. You frown when you think of Jaehyun. Were you wrong to tell him that you simply couldn’t choose him? What if fate is right and it falls apart? You stir your morning coffee, the will to drink it fading slowly. It’s already fallen apart—and it wasn’t fate who did that, it was you. Should you have taken his stupidly warm hands and asked him to follow you? You don’t understand how it works at all.
Centuries of questioning what love is, poking and prodding at it like a lab sample, and there’s still no perfect answer. Love is blind. Love is cruel. Love is a fever. Love is temporary insanity. Love is acceptance. Love will set you free. There’s just too many variations. You can never tell if fate is meant to make it easier or worse. 
No one questions you at the office and you're not sure if you’re glad or aggravated. Only Doyoung shoots you a pitiful look which you brush off and immediately get into work. Embarrassment is only real if you acknowledge it. However, every time Dongmin tries to talk to you, you ask for space and even alone in your thoughts, you don’t get it. They just have to drift to Jaehyun.
You wonder if what he said was true, that he wanted you enough to forget the system. It’s clearly ruined now. The spiral of thinking has you zoning out during work more often than not and even Doyoung ends up reprimanding you for your lack of focus. Sometimes you want to snap but other times, you’re just hopelessly reciting the events over and over in your head. This was supposed to happen, wasn’t it? You don’t even have the strength left in you to blame it all on Jaehyun.
You pace in the corridors after work, contemplating popping by the Marketing Department. What could go wrong? Sure, it was a little dramatic of you to leave like that but everything can be fixed, right? You groan. What you were supposed to be fixing, you made worse. Are your hands cursed or something? You shake your head, returning to your desk to gather your belongings and head home.
Unfortunately, the sight of Doyoung sitting in your chair alarms you and you stop a foot away. 
“If you’re going to reprimand me for watching cat videos instead of checking the employee records, I can assure you my efficiency is still top-notch.” 
“You’re—what? Never mind.” Doyoung shakes his head. “Can you give this ginseng pack to Jaehyun? I owe him.” 
Oh no. You know where this is going.
“You know I’m going to keep that for myself, right?” You make a face. “I’d rather die than face Jaehyun right now.”
Doyoung shrugs. “Who knows? Maybe he’ll be the one running to you. This is in case of an emergency.”
You give him a fake smile and Doyoung shakes his head. “Good to see you’re still great at pretending to be fine.”
You sigh. “Thanks for looking out for me, bossman.”
Doyoung blinks, hand covering his mouth when an audible gasp leaves him. “Woah. I think that’s the first time I’ve heard you thank me. But don’t call me bossman ever again.”
“Noted,” you say, taking your bag and leaving with a short goodbye. You’re lucky he lets you off work early, even if you never took it. Employees usually can’t leave until their superiors does and if you were a senior employee, you’d be giving your juniors quite the hell.
You seem to be good at concocting hellscapes. Perhaps, you should look for job openings in the underworld. One last thought of Jaehyun exits your head and you take the bus home, admiring the city you live in and the warmth of people and their relationships. You don’t feel jealous; you just bask in them for the time—be it a mother and her son or two bickering sisters or a lovely old couple. That’s how it’s meant to be, then. That’s how love works.
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Jaehyun smacks his head against the sofa armrest for the fifteenth time in a row.
“Dude. You’re going to permanently ruin the fabric.” Sicheng says, eyes trained on his laptop screen.
“I should’ve said something more.” Jaehyun’s voice is so zombie-like, he thinks he should cast himself in the Train to Busan sequel as an extra.
“I’m glad I’m not you,” Sicheng mutters.
“Can you give me some sort of consolation, at least?”
“That’s not what I’m your friend for.”
Jaehyun sighs and resumes smacking the back of his head against the armrest. He really needs to figure this out. After all, he can’t really Google the solution to this.
“One thing doesn’t make sense,” Sicheng says, finally looking up from his screen. “Why do you have the same mark as (name)’s if you’re not soulmates?”
“You’re so incredibly—but adorably—stupid, Sicheng. She drew it in with a permanent marker. She kissed me too! It was sudden and weird but I didn’t mind it.
“Yikes.” Sicheng makes a face. “So… you didn’t take a shower for how long now?”
Jaehyun furrows his eyebrows. “What?”
“The ink hasn’t washed off. I heard you singing in the shower yesterday, how could you not have washed that off? Ugh. Don’t tell me you miss her.”
Jaehyun’s eyes widen as he jumps up and rushes to the washroom. Looking into the mirror, the tattoo poking out from his T-shirt resembles yours a lot more than his. The arrow is still drawn in. Jaehyun’s shoulder slumps. He doesn’t know what he was expecting. Turning the tap and letting the water flow, he wets his hand and rubs at his collarbone to remove the arrow.
Except it doesn’t budge. His skin turns painfully red from the rubbing but the ink, which usually washes off in less than five minutes has no intention of leaving. Did you use a different brand of marker the last time? When was it anyway? 
Jaehyun breathes out, firming his resolve. He needs to be with you.
Sicheng blinks in surprise as Jaehyun grabs his car keys, not even bothering to change from an all-black getup of a T-shirt and jeans like some emo teenager, and shuts the front door behind him. Not even a ‘goodbye, I’m leaving!’
Sicheng sighs. Love makes people crazy. He’s not falling into that trap when his soulmate literally doesn’t exist, the same as his soulmark. It seems the contestants in this game are full of exceptions.
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You hit your head against your pillow. To visit Jaehyun or not to. You haven’t left your bed since you woke up around seven in the morning, and now it’s ten. Your bedsheets are a mess because you’ve rolled around too much on them (in despair, not with someone unfortunately).
You need the quiet sometimes to let your mind rest, to let your heart rest. You needed time. But maybe it’s been long enough and now you’re just searching for excuses to hold on to your last shred of dignity.
You lift your head up and glare at the box of ginseng on your table. Should you? You reluctantly get up, feeling a sting of pain in your back for lying in that awkward position for so long. Right when you’ve put on your slippers, the doorbell rings and you groan. How did the package you stress-ordered last night arrive so early? These deliveries are getting faster and faster.
You walk to the front door and open it thoughtlessly, freezing up at the sight. Your first reaction is to cover yourself. You’re not exactly your best-looking version at the moment. Jaehyun’s dark circles almost match yours but he’s better dressed than you are—in a black T-shirt and jeans while you’re wearing a Gudetama pajama set.
“We’re not just friends,” he blurts. “We’re not soulmates but we’re not just friends.”
“Huh? Oh my god, this is the most embarrassing I’ve looked.”
Jaehyun furrows his eyebrows in a question look. 
“That’s not important! Look—”
He pushes you inside, closing the door behind him. His hair is so disheveled and messy, he barely even looks like the same well-maintained marketing employee you know. 
Jaehyun tugs at his T-shirt, pulling down to reveal his tattoo—albeit with your marker-drawn arrow through it. He does have a pretty well-built chest, you note before chiding yourself for getting distracted.
You raise an eyebrow. “Do you, uh, need help scrubbing it off or something?”
“No.” Jaehyun lets out a huff of exasperation. “It won’t wash off. If it’s what I think it is—”
“Miracles don’t happen to people like us, Jaehyun,” you say quietly.
He gulps. “I don’t know about miracles but… I just needed an excuse to see you, I guess.”
You look up, a rose blush over Jaehyun’s bare face, and run your finger over the tattoo, sighing at the warmth of his skin. Your hand travels up to his cheek, resting atop it while you muster enough courage to look Jaehyun in his chocolate brown eyes.
You pull away. This isn’t the time. You still have an internal crisis to sort out. Are you even deserving of love? It makes much more sense if the answer is no. 
However, Jaehyun pulls you in by the waist, his right palm warm against your cheek.
“I don’t care what anyone says.” He runs his thumb over your cheek in a painfully fond manner. “You’re worth more than the price I pay for this.”
He leans in and presses his lips to yours swiftly, your head clearing of thoughts almost immediately. It feels so right, you can feel the spark, the red thread around your skin, hear the bells. This kiss was far more perfect than it was supposed to be.
You part, gasping. Jaehyun blinks at you, breathing heavily.
“Kiss me again.”
Jaehyun does as told and you might just believe in miracles this way. With his hand around your waist and in your hair, his lips over yours and the low rumbling laughter that parts the two of you—you might just believe in miracles. You might just believe that love isn't something you deserve by earning.
“I like this,” Jaehyun comments. “I like the way this is.”
You press your finger to his lips. “I think you should shut up and kiss me some more.”
Jaehyun rolls his eyes. “I know you’re sexually repressed as of now, but that’s no reason to take advantage of me.”
You scowl, punching him on the shoulder and moving away from him.
“Come back,” he complains in a quiet voice.
“I am not going to do that.” You cross your arms.
“Come on,” he mutters, inching closer as you inch away, till your back hits the couch and you tumble backwards onto it, your legs on the headrest. Jaehyun laughs at your position, leaning in to keep his hands on either side of you, a doting look over him.
“Hey, did you know if I kicked my leg up, it would hit you in the balls?”
“Please don’t do that.”
You giggle, Jaehyun’s nose rubbing against yours in a bunny kiss. 
“Is your place usually this much of a mess?” Jaehyun raises an eyebrow. 
You sigh heavily. “I was having a bad day, okay? Or… a bad weekend.”
“Do you even have food?”
You look away, crossing your arms. Jaehyun sighs and shakes his head.
“We should go grocery shopping. How do you live like this?”
You scoff. “Oh, spare me the lecture. I’ve heard enough horror stories about your room from Sicheng. You can’t hide from me by sweeping your clothes and belongings into his room.”
“Snitch,” he mutters under his breath.
You can’t help the giggle that erupts from your mouth and you immediately cover it. Jaehyun smiles at you fondly and you look away, unable to bear that gaze of his.
“It really won’t wash off, by the way,” Jaehyun states, scratching at his collarbone.
You narrow your eyes, smacking his arms away to roll off the couch. Taking his wrist, you walk into your bathroom and turn the tap on. Something’s strange. But also strangely right.
“Look, I already tried—ow! Don’t rub that hard!”
You blink in confusion, trying again despite Jaehyun looking like his soul already left him. It doesn’t work. Your marker isn’t even that permanent. At least his regenerating skin cells should get rid of that arrow. Unless the ink was deep enough to pierce all the layers, as in a soulmark.
You gasp.
“You were right!”
“I told you s—”
"That's the point, isn't it?" you say, realization dawning as your eyes widen. "To see if people will question the system at all."
Jaehyun shrugs. “Maybe.”
"Oh, all those unhappy marriages that could have been saved," you say as you exhale. 
Jaehyun chuckles lightly. "I think that the point was, people can be happy without their soulmates. It's whoever you make one out of. Or I Googled too many articles on anti-soulmate propaganda."
You smile, leaning in to press a kiss against his cheek. Watching his ears turn bright red is the cherry on top.
“Okay, fake-boyfriend-turned-real-soulmate.” You give him a cheeky smile. “Did you rethink your decision about sharing that Netflix password with me? I get the girlfriend free pass, right? Right?”
“I didn’t even share it with my mother.”
You whack his arm, him possibly used to it by now, judging from his lack of response. 
“Idiot.” You cross your arms. “We can Netflix… and chill then. God, I can’t believe I said that.”
Jaehyun breaks into a chuckle. “You’re so pushy.”
 “And you like being pushed around, nerd.”
“Who said that?”
Jaehyun wraps his arms around you, spinning you so that your back hits the door. He leans in to kiss you again and you smack your palm over his pouted lips. You laugh at his face, his eyes brimming with confusion.
“You’re in my apartment. I make the rules here. Think twice before you start a game with me, Mister.”
His shoulders droop. “Fine. Can you at least let me kiss you four times a day?”
“Five times, if you ask.”
He laughs before leaning in again. “Can I kiss you now?”
“Wasn’t it obvious?”
“You are one hell of a woman. Emphasis on hell.”
You laugh and grab his collar, pulling him in for the kiss that seals this deal.
You realize a few things in the moment: a) You don’t have to play roulette to find love, b) You don’t have to pick your poison to find love, and most importantly c) Love is right where you make something of it. Fate is still not in your good books but if it bends to you this way, you don’t mind at all. If Jaehyun kisses you like this every day, you don’t mind one bit. 
2K notes · View notes
luimagines · 3 years
Note
Hey, I’m not sure how to explain this but getting straight to the point, I’m the person who runs the yandere-linked-universe blog and I’m pretty sure you’re pinkittwice.
So, I was just wondering what ideas you might have about the chain being yandere for one person. Like, what would the dynamic be and how they would behave as yanderes, you know that kind of stuff.
I hope it’s not too much to ask but I’m just curious to see what you might think of it since you’re pretty much the only person on the sight that I know of who also writes things involving lu and the reader. I’m not unhappy or dissatisfied in any way but it does get a little lonely being the only person who writes stuff like this. Sorry if this is too weird.
Masterlist
Yahaha~! You found me!
Everybody go check out their stuff @yandere-linked-universe
They do cool art sometimes and are even writing a whole fic which you can find right here.
It's really well written and I'm excited to see how the story progresses and where it goes- especially endgame.
And I'm assuming the ask means if they were yandere in the same circumstance than in the story.
That being said, I'm still going to apply the rules I have set for the Links. Like how Sky was never with his Zelda and similarly how Time and Malon never really happened. As for Wind, he will not be platonic unlike in the fic mentioned above- I will explain this in his section I promise.
Also, disclaimer, I'm not good at horror and I've never written for these types of characters before. But if you want headcanons then I'll provide the brainstorm that I've been cooking up of ever since I got this ask. (And it was a while ago I'm sorry for the wait.)
I'm also including some songs that I think best fit their rose tinted glasses ideal. Not necessarily yandere and can apply to Link being in love with you in general but it's as close as I'm going to get to making a playlist.
I might come back and change them to stalker songs and add these songs to a separate list entirely but maybe not...
Content under the cut!
It's long, brace yourself.
As a group, I think jealously would run high.
Everybody wants the attention of a single person and there's eight other people as competition.
If the group was tight knit as we like to portray them, it won't last long.
If dear reader was a little caring or naturally falls into a healer/medic position in the group, the group becomes more reckless, less caring about their personal safety- if only to get a momentary caress from the love of their life's fingers as their wounds are tended to.
There's less group unity and alliances between them form.
If the reader isn't a fighter well...
They would take turns guarding their prize and fight to be the one to do it.
Leaving you behind when they go to dungeons is a must.
They won't risk you getting a scratch on your person let alone putting you in a potentially dangerous situation.
They try to keep all their weapons away and out of reach. Less you get any ideas and try to fight with them or worse, get hurt playing with them.
Or try to fight against them. HAHAHAHA!! How crazy would that be?
Like you would stand a chance.
When you're simply traveling with the group, your designated spot is on top of Epona, hands down, no questions asked.
Not only would be easier to keep an eye on you, and make it harder to get away, but Twilight has personally asked Epona (through Wolfie) that if they were ever ambushed, she was to take off with you and get away from the fight no matter the cost. She'll always come back to him anyway- so if you're tied to connected to her than all the more reason for him to be the one to retrieve you when it's all over.
The others don't like how Twilight gets to be the one to greet you first. But Epona is on Twilight's side and everyone knows it.
So they wait their turn.
You're on top of Epona even if you're a fighter as well.
If you can prove your salt and fight with them, they actually don't try to keep you away as much as they can (because now it means that they can spend more time with you!)
It instead becomes a competition to be your partner. Among the younger ones anyway.
The older ones, are less concerned now by you fighting, and more by the younger ones who keep trying to be by your side (even if that's their spot) and try to keep them out of your way.
Every bump and cut you get is treated immediately by who ever reaches you first.
It's once again a race.
The group, as yandere's go, do not know how annoying they're being nor do they plan to stop.
If you told stories of your past conquests, it a mixed bag of awe, adoration and anger for you even being put there to begin with. These thoughts are not voiced however, and they instead stew and simmer and grow into their possessive tendencies.
Because they would protect you, honor you, worship you and you wouldn't have to worry about anything ever again. Not if you were with them, not if you stayed with them, not if you were in their Hyrule.
There's a slight knee jerk reaction when you bring out your items to take it away because it's dangerous. But not only would that piss you off, it would take away what little protection you have on your person and they don't want to take any risks when it comes to your safety.
I wouldn't share too much if I were you.
youtube
Now as Individuals they're all different, obviously.
Let's explore that.
Time
He's the most dangerous
I'm starting this off with that
I'm talking the most calculating, scheming and devious of the whole group
He know he's in charge and that the others will listen to him regardless if they actually agree with him or not
Because he's the leader
His grip on the group lessens as time goes by and their unity dissipates
But he's delusional and he doesn't realize it
However, because he's already in this position, he takes it upon himself to take care of you
And others let him
Less work for them to focus on when they can be by your side instead
You never have watch
You're always in the middle of the group
He'd gladly send the boys ahead of you into danger to make sure that they deal with it before you even get there.
The others let him with little thought because it's for you
So they go for it
Time however, is somehow, never the one to go ahead, instead waiting behind (with you) while they go ahead and deal with the issue
He gets away with this 8/10 times
Mostly because he rotates who's he's sacrificing
Dad! Time is not here- not anymore
But he lets them near you because he's only biding his time
You're meant to be
Soulmates, if you will
If a little time with you is all those boys need to stay in line and listen to him then he'll allow it
Because they're only boys
He's a man through and through
They have nothing on him
And you deserve more than a mere boy
He has some other concerns on his mind while the boys fight each other like street dogs
Time has to think about your future together so he daydreams the most out of the group.
He doesn't really have a home and a roof over his head for himself- let alone you and he knows he'd have to change that
He thinks about staying as a permanent employee at Lon Lon Ranch
He can save enough money
Buy a house
Maybe some land
And enough things for you and him to make a comfortable life without any worries
Maybe even start a family?
The dream is a reprieve form the headache that are other boys who won't leave you alone
Pray you don't end up in his Hyrule
EVER
This is just the gateway he'd be waiting for to keep you all to himself
Fighter or not it's dangerous to travel with them
You're in danger
And he won't stand for that.
He doesn't know how exactly he'd do it
But he plans to leave you at Lon Lon Ranch, waiting for him, for when he comes back after the mission
He'd have to find some kind of way to actually keep you there and find you when you inevitably try to leave the Ranch
But he's traveled all over his Hyrule
There's no place you could go that he doesn't know about
As the adult of the group, he'd step over all the others
He's not going to listen to them when they try to stop him
They don't know as much as he does
They haven't experienced as much as he has
He knows that this is the best and only option to ensure that you're safe and well taken care of
He'd doesn't mind leaving you as prisoner to the Gerudo instead either if the others start to really get pushy
It won't be comfortable and it won't be glamorous
But they'll definitely keep you in one place
And he can walk in whenever he wanted thanks to that note from the chief from a time long ago
Pick you up, take you away and you'll be his
He daydreams a lot
And he knows that you'll choose him
You have to
He's the best and only option
He's never felt happier thinking about you and the life you'll both have
He's struggled so much anyway
Maybe you were the blessing the goddesses owed him for all his work in his youth
And surely they aren't so cruel to give you to him and then take you away by some monster attack or some terrible unforeseen fate
He can't have that either
So he'll take the first and best out he's given
But while you're here with him...
He's looking at you like you're magic
youtube
Warrior
Warrior is the least dangerous
He knows the feel of being on the receiving side of someone's obsession
He was ignorant for a long time about it
But he wasn't sure how to feel comfortable in his own skin again when he found out about it
He can see how the others are starting to show similar obsessive tendencies and tries to mitigate what he can
He does a lot of damage control
It's what he's trying to do anyway- he's not very successful
Warrior is the one who's challenging their train of thought
Why do they think this is ok? Why don't they ask you for your opinion? Why do they not give some time alone to recharge? Why don't they lay off?
Because it's totally for your benefit- AND THEIRS
Because it's not ok
He doesn't see himself follow the exactly same train of thought
He doesn't see himself doing what they're doing
He's just annoyed that they're the ones doing it
Warrior becomes the very definition of hypocrite.
However- because he's the one acting as your advocate- the others don't consider him as much as a threat and therefore more inclined to listen to him at this point in time than Time himself
It also means that they don't fight him as much when he wants time with you. Mostly because in their eyes, he's not interested
They're wrong
At some point in Warrior's attempt to keep the group together and keep you from going crazy or hating all of them, he begins to gain ulterior motives in his mission
He begins to play the role in an attempt to win you over.
Because- see, he's not like them
He won't violate your space
Go through your stuff
Or keep you from doing what you love
He's the one to say you should join them in fights, that you should stay, that you can hold your own
Since he's the main strategist in the group, he takes into account your skills and always places you at a distance from the fight or from the most obsessive the group.
He knows that their one track mind could kill you or them and there's still the darkness to defeat.
They don't have the luxury to afford this kind of distractions
When the others aren't paying attention to him, he'd pepper you with compliments and flirty lines, playing up his charm and suave attitude
He becomes the perfect gentleman
You'd never know that he's crazy
Just join him and be with him- that's all he wants
He loves you so what more is there to offer you?
He's got the status, the looks and the means to take care of you so you wouldn't have to worry about anything else
He'd be the best husband that Hyrule has ever seen
He'd hate to have the group scare you off with how over the top they've all been.
He knows the group is being annoying with being by your side all the time and how they don't let you be and how there's always someone by your side even when you're at your final straw
Warrior is the one who takes over guarding you when you need to pee or bath and actively argues on your behalf to let you take care of your hygiene.
He's not always successful but it's the thought that counts right?
Hyrule agrees with him most of the time and since Hyrule seems to be the only one who still cares (somewhat) about the mission, they make an agreement
Warrior isn't at all concerned about the others and know that you'd come around to him eventually.
Since he's not like the others
You're his first thought in the morning, his last thought when he rests his head to sleep and there's nothing that he hasn't been doing that wasn't for you
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Hyrule
Hyrule is the least possessive
Mostly because of his low confidence.
I've mentioned in a previous post that is unrelated to this, his love language is physical touch- so he's all over you
There always have to be some way that he's holding you- whether its a hand on your shoulder or the small of your back, maybe he's holding your hand or maybe he's just pinched the edge of your tunic
But he's careful to not go beyond what you're comfortable with
He doesn't want to you to pull away from him
Because the others will not hesitate to push and pull him away if you so much as hinted at not wanting him near you
So he plays it cool
Hyrule also gets concerned when there's too many injuries to go around and he needs to heal the group
Because if you hurt then he can't spare anything else to help you
It's one of the few things he thinks that he's useful for- so if he can't do this little thing for you then why does he bother?
There's so many other guys here that could easily sweep you off of your feet and have so much more to offer you
He doesn't have any land
He doesn't have a house
His Hyrule... isn't the most welcoming and he doesn't like the idea of bringing you from one dangerous situation to another
Especially since he's being hunted for sport back home
It doesn't stop him from trying to win your heart obviously and he tries to show you and win you over in whatever little ways he can.
He's the gentlest with you
Whatever hurting you, he'll heal
Whatever scaring you, he'll deal with
Whatever danger comes your way, he'll end it's miserable existence
He- like Time- daydreams a lot but he's trying to live for the moment
He's almost resigned in a way- that you won't pick him
He knows they're on borrowed time, he knows that something dangerous can take you away from them or that he could be the one to be taken away instead
So he's trying to make up for it in the time that you do have together and spend every second by your side that he can
Because the group gets a little more reckless in their attempts to impress you and be dealt with (whether you're healing them and tending to their wounds or just yelling at them)
He heals the group a lot little less
If they're going to be stupid and get hurt- then he's not going to waste his magic when they're only going to do the same thing the next day
Soon, with enough time and patience, Hyrule begins to hoard all the healing potions as well.
It's an attempt to keep them away from you so when they're hurt he can step in and just get them healed up in a minute
But it also works to keep the group from getting too reckless
It's not his intention but he takes it as it is
If they get hurt too much anyway then that just means less competition for him to deal with and a higher chance with you!
Because of his low confidence about you actually ending up with him, he becomes one of the more mission minded of the group, probably right after Warrior
Since they both have their sights on eradicating the darkness instead of focusing on their love lives (for different reasons) this is the first alliance to be formed
Hyrule wants you to be his but he's at a crossroad
He knows Warrior has a lot of charm to win you over and has the means to make sure you live a good life
He knows it's more than he can ever give you
But he's fairly certain he can take Warrior in a fight
One well timed Thunder Strike and Warrior wouldn't stand a chance
Not to mention that they've been fighting side by side now, so he knows what to look for to bring him down
He doesn't think it'll come to that though
Warrior doesn't seem that interested with you anyway so he doesn't worry about him
Which just leaves the problem of winning your heart
He wonders what life would be like he can love like you do
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Twilight
Twilight is the most protective
It's his wolf instincts and his caretaker instincts combined.
He's used to being the one to look after everyone else
Being his village's primary babysitter and all
But wolves are family animals and they protect their mates
He's the one to fight to keep you away from the fights, whether you can handle yourself or not
He can Four agree with this and it's the second alliance that forms
You must be protected at all costs and there's many things around that can injure you, or worse
So they both try their hardest to keep you safe and secure
If bubble wrap existed in Hyrule you would have been wrapped in it and then wrapped again for good measure.
He's the first to run up to you and the first to drag over Hyrule or someone with a fairy or a potion to treat you
He's not afraid to start punching anything that dares to threaten you
Forget the sword
He'll just start swinging... or maybe just go full Woflie even if he's not in his form and go for the jugular
He lets you ride on Epona more often than not and refuses to let you work more than you should
He's quick to carry things for you
He tries to impress you by being a handy man and tries to fix whatever he can get his hands on for you
He's not good at it
But he tries
His love language is acts of service so he's trying
You don't really need his help though
But let him get it out
And tell him that he's doing a good job please, for your sake
He talks a lot about his home life with you and he ask a lot of questions about your own
He's comparing notes
Trying to see what way of life you'd be more comfortable with and how he can accommodate to it
He tries to win you over with the simple life and he paints pretty pictures of having a ranch and a farm and letting you have all and any animals you want
Wolfie make an appearance every other day instead of simply whenever it's convenient
If you're a dog lover then it's even better.
Twilight is not afraid of taking advantage of it to give you all the kisses and cuddles he can get away in his other form
The others would have to fight the each other just to get kisses from you but Wolfie gets special privilege's
He gets kisses no problem
He's not above using it to his advantage
Epona is always on Twilight side and while he's in wolf form, he tells her all about you and how much he loves you and all the ways he finds you amazing and spectacular
Because you're riding Epona more often than not, he tells her to watch after you and to keep your safe and to get to a safe area if they ever get ambushed
She doesn't know how human romance works, so she agrees.
Link is her master and her best friend, so she trusts him with her life and you're important to him, clearly, so you're important to her too
He's not going to lose you like he lost Midna
She left him behind with barely a glance behind
You won't leave him at all
He'll make sure of it
The others won't take you away from him either
Four seems to be the one who's most on his side right now and together they can lessen the competition
He'd hate to fight the guy and maybe they can come to an understanding but he knows he's got the brute strength that Four lacks not to mention Wolfie and Epona as well
So maybe he'll listen to reason
His world used to be so grey with no change in either direction
An eternal twilight
You became his light in the gloom
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Sky
Sky is the least violent
He actually falls in the middle of both protectiveness and jealousy.
But he's more set on letting each of the boy pick each other off (not unlike Time) and then he'll figure out who's left over to deal with them then.
Sky also isn't one to fight off the other people who you interact with
He's not going to go confront the person or drag you away and definitely not going to start swinging
He still feels uncomfortable if you aren't by his side but he'll make up for it when you're done by sticking to your hip
Sky doesn't want you to feel cramped by only talking to the group
But he does get a little jumpy when you're beyond his line of sight.
That being said- he will let you out of his sight
Not for long periods of time, mind you, but he's not going to be in your shadow the entire time or demand to be glued to your hip
He's arguably the most normal out of the group- the least yandere if you will
Still crazy though
Sky is also one to agree with Warrior and Twilight.
He's not a part of any alliance but between wanting you to be safe and still wanting you to be healthy and clean (he knows how being clean helps out ones moral and he doesn't want you to be depressed when you're with them) he'd let them do the fighting and arguing for him and when they lose a bit, he'll say something and add to their cause
He's trying to be chill and he plays on his harp when you're nearby.
If you come sit next him to listen and chill- he will absolutely be over the moon
He will go through some of your things to make sure you have anything and everything you'd need for their adventure
But he won't take away your weapons or go through your diary (he wouldn't be able to read it anyway)
He does try to ask you in some roundabout way if he has permission to do that.
It'll be long winded and vague and a total play on words, so be careful to what you agree with when he asks something of you
Sky although is the least violent, that's in regards to other humans
Monsters have learned to keep away from him when he's on the battle field and if they haven't learned that...
They will
He's the one that tries to have your relationship mature and grow naturally.
Sky is going to simply be your friend first and show you that he has your best interest at heart
So when you talk to him about your problems and how the others are driving you crazy, he'll give you advice, tell you he's on your side and openly give you outs to avoid the others.
If you want time alone and the others begin looking for you, he'll tell them you went in the other direction and he'll send them on a wild goose chase.
Since he's on your side, he tells you to at least let him know where you're going and for how long so he can distract the others.
He's not concerned about you running away, since the others are going to do the work for him
Four and Twilight and Wolfie can find and hunt you down in a heart beat and you'll be together again
He won't blame you for running away, there's a lot of people who won't leave you alone in the group and it annoys him too
And Hyrule, Wind and Time keep you within the group and close by so he never has to worry about not knowing where you are at all times
Warrior and Wild keep you well fed and well taken care of
And Legend makes sure that you always have a potion on you and has even given some power rings to ensure your safety
So all he has to do is butter you up by being the least persistent of them all and you'll fall for him and you can be together forever and ever and even be the start of Hyrule as everyone knows it
Wouldn't that be nice?
While he may not be the most musically inclined of the group, he's the one to serenade you when he gets the chance
He plays his harp more often than not, trying to get the notes out that he hears in his head when he looks at you
His life was such a simple song before you came along but now... It's a symphony, he wants you to know this
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Four
Four is the most controlling
He's the one putting restrictions on you left and right and is the one to never want you to leave his side- let alone his line of sight.
You see, he's got these voices in his head that bounce ideas off of each other.
When one might be, hey that guy is talking to you
The other responds with, he's close to you too
One might say, you're smiling and it's beautiful
Another says, why is it directed at that guy?
Which snowballs to, you're a little too close, a little too nice, is he flirting? Has he touched you? Is he trying to make a move?
And then he's even more possessive and it grows and spirals and next thing he knows, he's next to you again and chewing the poor guy out for no reason when it was a simple conversation about the weather and directions.
And that's in public
Now add in the threat of monsters and traps and many other dangerous that surround the group as a whole
He's paranoids in the extreme
So when Twilight suggests that they tie you to Epona and keep you where he they can always see you, he's the first to agree
In fact he feels as if Twilight is the only one who's actually looking out for your well being
Wind tries to throw fits and get the two of them to back off but he's just a kid, what does he know? He should know better anyway, he knows how dangerous this journey is going to get, so why is Wind trying to actively put you in harms way?
Twilight a least can get Wind to listen to reason and Twilight's better at explaining it than he is so while Four'll yell, Wind is really Twilight's problem.
He doesn't like the idea of fighting is friends but he can see that well... He's the only to notice that they're not as close as they used to be when you first joined.
He thinks that Warrior can feel it but Four is the one who'll say it out loud.
Four is actually the most trigger happy out of all them, he's not afraid to break character and yell at some poor passerby who's too foolish enough to even look in your direction
He's the angry guard dog in public and it's a little hard to reign him most of the time
Twilight agree with him in this but he's also the one to hold him back
The last thing they need is to be kicked out of town
But if while you're there maybe he can get something for you?
He's the kind of person to make something for their beloved but he only knows how to make weapons and tools
Things that he's never going to give to you and actively tries to keep them away from at all costs
Yes, if you have your own weapons he'll also try to take them away
He'd rather see you angry than injured
No, he does not see how being weaponless in a fight will lead to more injuries and no, he not going to listen to those who try to tell him that.
Maybe he can learn how to make jewelry and gift that instead?
A pretty thing like yourself should be adorned in more beauty.
And he can save enough to make it with rubies and diamonds and any gold that he can salvage in Hyrule
He'd give you and make you anything you want
You'd be dripping in jewels if he had it his way
He also knows that the voices try to point out his flaws and all the ways that he's really not that appealing to any potential partners
It doesn't matter that he's merged and they all have the same flaws
But whenever he's next to you and things are calm, the voices are quiet and he feels like him
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Wild
Wild is the Most violent
Like Four, he does not care if it's a simple conversation, if someone else is taking up your time and attention then he will want to start swinging.
He's usually held back by Warrior and Time since Twilight typically has to restrain Four
But if you're in danger? Real danger?
He becomes the equivalent of the Fierce Deity, no mask required
The battle field becomes a blood bath by his hand alone
Sure the others will want to to cause some destruction as well and destroy any and all threats to you, but Wild goes the extra mile
Forget Twilight going feral, he has an excuse- but Wild?
He'll go ballistically feral, even going as far to drop his weapons to rip into the threats with his hands and teeth
He has to make sure there's absolutely nothing in between you and him
He's not afraid to throw away his whole good guy reputation and even the reputation of the hero in order make sure he's the last man standing
Wild is now taking notes on how the the group fights and how they defend themselves, defend you and try to figure out the best ways to take them down
If there was ever to be a physical fight within the group, he'll not only be a part of it but most likely also the instigator
Wild has already lost all his friends and family before, he can't afford to lose anyone else
Besides his Hyrule has so much more to offer you than some of the others
Not to mention he has his own house- in a safe village- with low monsters around it- and barely any reason to think that he wouldn't be able to provide for you
He's got the rupees he needs from his monster farming and everything's nearby. Whatever he can't get, he can teleport to and he wouldn't have to leave you alone for long periods of time.
Wild goes out of his way to buy you clothes since the others have taken care of your other needs (much to his chagrin)
But he also makes sure you have the best portions of the meals he makes
He keep tracks how much you ate and when
He always there to give you a snack if you even mention of being peckish
He knows the others won't mind if he dotes in this manner
Not only because it's for you...
He has all the food anyway.
When he sees that you're wearing Legend's old tunic, he instantly hates it
He and Legend are less of an alliance and merely on tolerable terms- not that Legend notices or cares- because of this and Wild knows that your clothes have taken a lot battery
He wants to you be warm and protected
But he also has a lot of extra outfits
So he takes a page out of Legend's book and gives you some as well
He's a little disappointed you don't wear them as often but he knows that most of them are specialized for certain terrain- Legend's is more of a catch all kind of deal so he can understand the need for general uses
He's not happy about it
But he understands
The crazy thing is, you wouldn't want to end up in his Hyrule either
Pray you never do
Like Time, Wild has been all over his Hyrule and has traveled to all the nooks and crannies
He knows that he can hide you away without the others ever knowing what happened to you
Not even Wolfie would be able to track you
Why?
Because (and this is from AoC) he can teleport more than one person at a time, so he can just take you far away and somewhere secluded, somewhere where you wouldn't be able to leave
Hebra region? In the cabin where he learned how to shield surf? Or play the snow bowl game?
Gerudo Wasteland?
Akkala Region? With Robbie? It's hard to get past the guardians and the high level monsters...
Or maybe ditch you in the mountains with Paya in Kakariko Village?
Or maybe leave you on the Great Plateau? You can't get down without a paraglider...
Life with you is the only reason he's still on this journey instead of just taking you and leaving
The darkness is still around and it threatens his future with you
But it looks bright in his head when all is over and he's so happy that he met you
Life is now pink! And he won't take off his rose tinted glasses any time soon!
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Legend
Legend is the most possessive
As some people have headcanoned in the past, he has a problem letting things go
He's lost so many people he cares about- he knows that items are a little harder to lose
He's the Collector- the Hoarder
Naturally when he sees something that he wants, he'll stop at nothing to make it his.
However, since he has a problem coming into direct contact with his own feelings, he's projecting
Legend instead tries to keep you at arms length and fails miserably
He doesn't want to fall for someone only to have them be ripped form him again, and again and again,
He cares for the group still even after their disagreements and eventually mistrust
He doesn't want to leave this little family they've made for themselves and has disillusioned himself into thinking that he can save it before it's too late
But in his fairytale ending, you're with him
Legend, though, still knows that their time will end and everyone will eventually go home so by the time everyone begins fighting and jealousy runs amuck, he's trying to hold everyone at arms length
When you don't give him attention, he's prone to get angry and may very well at times act like he hates you
He doesn't like it when you so much as breath in someone else's direction
You're his and his alone, why is anyone else even worth your time and energy?
But he's not going to say this out loud
So he's frustrated with himself and pouts often
So he's stuck in a cycle of self hatred and jealousy and not willing to do something to change it
But when you do give him attention, he's melts into a puddle
He's at your beck and call if so much as say his name
There's very little that he isn't willing to do for you or get for you, anything to make you happy
He's also quick to give you power rings to protect you even if he's against you fighting
Legend is also going to give you an extra tunic if (/when) your clothes take too much damage and they're too far gone for him to fix
It's a power move on his part
Not only does he feel giddy with boyish excitement when he sees you in his old tunic (that definitely has some kind of magical properties to ensure your safety), it's also him marking you as his property
And the others know it
Wild does a similar thing so you can at least have a change of clothes but Legend is quick to tailor them when you're not looking to not fit you and be uncomfortable
He's the one going through your things for sure
He need to know that he's the one who's taking care of you
He needs to know you have everything you need
He needs to know if there's anything that you're lacking so that he can sweep in and provide it for you
He's not really planning on taking out the competition or is planning beyond keeping you by his side for the day
He (like Hyrule) is living for the moment, because he's afraid he's going to blink and you'd be gone and there would be nothing else left for him
But you won't be gone
He's going to make sure of that
He's got tunnel vision for sure
But since he's also trying to not fall for you and get his heart broken, it becomes a game of hot and cold with a whole lot of minefields in between that could set him off for (what looks like) no reason
He hates you- no he doesn't- he wants nothing to do with you- he wants to be your everything- he's not going to write you poetry or braid your hair or fall asleep listening to your heart beat- he would kill for that to be his reality- he hates that you're all he's able to think about now- don't leave him please
He's not crushing
He's not
He is
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Wind
Wind is the least protective- Still protective but arguably not to the degree of the others
You see, he knows that the others protect him because he's the youngest
And he's not blind
He can see that they're just as, if not more, protective over you
He can see how you hate it and how much it annoys you
He's not going to make that same move
And as a bonus, since the others are protecting you anyway, why should he put in the work and protect you as well?
There's enough people watching you all the time
With the others taking care of it, he can plan on winning you over
He's going to give you as much freedom as he's able to get away with
It'll put him as your favorite
This immediately puts him at a crossroads with Four who's somehow a hair's breadth away from tying you up and chaining you together by the wrists
They fight against each other the most
He plans on marrying you
It's honestly in the same degree of young children that say they're growing to grow up and marry their dad or their mom
Because obviously you marry the person you love and you stay with them for the rest of your life
And he loves you.
So that's what he plans to do
Win you over is step one
Then he (and you) just need to wait a few years for him to get older
And then he'll marry you
He does not see a problem with this plan
Typically I make the reader the same age as him to avoid the worst of it but in this case, this does not matter
I'd say that if you're older, he'd get more easily attached to giving you the freedom you've been missing
With him by your side obviously
Because you're older- you're an 'adult'- you can take care of yourself
You're so cool in his eyes
The others, naturally, see a problem with this
Not only out of jealously at the very thought of it not being them to marry you but because they know he's young and if you're older, (say closer to Twilight and Warrior's age) then they can see the problem it'll prove to be for you from a moral stand point
The others (mainly Legend and Four) bully tease him when you're not around about how selfish he is to even think about making you wait, when you could easily marry one of them instead, so why would you ever choose him?
He tries not to let it get to him because he does hang out with you more than they get to- so maybe they're really just jealous that his plan is working
Wind has the more innocent approach to this whole ordeal out of the whole group
His obsession isn't healthy, obviously, but he at least the excuse of being young and not knowing how to deal with crushes
Because he's awkward with it, (and he knows it) he's actually pretty quick to shut away the worst of it when he's spending time with you, less you think he's weird and push him away
Not only does he not want that to happen, but he's heard the others come up to you countless times regarding him and his behavior and if you'd like him to leave you alone
Because they will deal with him if you so much as say one word of annoyance
The choice is yours
If you indulge him when he wants your attention then he's more like himself and becomes the most normal out of the whole group
He becomes the him when you first joined
Before the obsession
Wind becomes your safest bet in terms of keeping your sanity intact and it's the groups saving grace to keep up any illusion that they're still normal
Wind is dealing with a highly flammable vial of puppy love concentrate
All in the form of budding teenage yandere hormones
If you had met him any later in his life, the cocktail would have no doubt exploded into the form of the other's behavior and he'd seem like a completely different person instead
He's almost like a lost puppy, always following you around and being in your shadow
It would be cute if he wasn't crazy
Wind adores you though and he wants you to know that
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ericspinkhair · 3 years
Text
quarantine longings
pairing: best friend!kevin x fem!reader
word count: 3.2k
synopsis: you and your best friend have sex because quarantine made you horny
warnings: best friends to lovers, takes place during the pandemic, spoiler of 356 days (but not the end, just generally the plot), no use of condoms but only the pill, creampie, sexual fantasies, fingering, hand-job, sex, slight angst at the end if you squint
a/n: I would literally die for kevin, I love him so much. I'll be writing a multiple parts series about him after I'm done writing scenarios for every member first.
requests are open!
masterlist + requests
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you slammed your foot hard against the wall and cursed in pain. you hopped on one foot to your bed, holding your other leg in agony and tasted blood as you bit your lip to keep the volume of your suffering groans in check. someone knocked on the door.
'are you okay?' your roommate asked concerned.
'no, leave me alone, kevin,' you croaked out. you wanted to suffer by yourself.
there was an awkward silence and then you heard him sigh. soon after, the door next to your room closed shut.
why were you so frustrated, one might ask? well, the pandemic was kicking your butt and you just couldn't take it anymore. when the news of the virus had first spread, no one thought it would become this serious. but suddenly everyone was walking around with masks and spent most of their time staying at home.
after graduating high school, you and kevin had decided to move in together for college because both of you were broke and couldn't afford to live alone. you had been best friends since middle school and had been convinced that it was a smart idea at the time.
and everything went smoothly for the first one and a half years. however, after not seeing anyone else since the start of the pandemic over a year ago, it became increasingly difficult to share an apartment, but not in the way one might assume. you were neither sick of each other nor did you fight a lot. to tell the truth, it was quite the opposite.
earlier, before you had kicked the wall in anger, the two of you had painted together. kevin was majoring in art and, since you didn't have anything better to do, you joined him while he did projects for his classes. you might have been majoring in journalism but you had always liked drawing and painting, even though you weren't particularly skilled. you were a naturally clumsy person, always tripping over air and dropping things. today you were hecticly moving around your hands while telling him about a stupid video you had seen and you accidently let go of the brush in your hand. it hit the side of kevin's face, leaving a wide splodge of red paint on his right cheek.
to get back at you, he jerked his paint brush and splattered some green color on your white shirt. you saw this as a challenge and soon both of you were both drenched in the colors of the rainbow, laughing hysterically on the floor, not caring that you were spreading the paint on the poor carpet.
you turned your heads to look at each other and you felt absolutely in peace. you loved this man and couldn't be more glad that it was him and not anyone else you were stuck with inside of this apartment.
he stood up to take off his stained shirt and your smile quickly faded off your face. your lips slightly parted and you couldn't help but stare at his now exposed biceps and abs.
your mouth watered and you felt heat pooling between your legs as you took your time to study his architecture. thoughts about how badly you wanted him to thrust into you while his strong arms held you up invaded your mind. you tried to shake them off but it was impossible.
occasions like this were slowly becoming a common occurrence for you.
having mostly stayed inside for over a year, also meant that you didn't have sex for that long. it's not like you were the horniest person on the planet but you still had needs that were being neglected. with kevin being home all the time you didn't even dare to masturbate, scared that he would be able to hear you through the frustratingly thin walls. you must have gone insane with all the lust building up inside you and that's why you suddenly craved to have sex with your best friend. this whole thing was destroying everything. it was hard to act normal when he was making you this nervous and heated but you tried to pretend that everything was fine anyway for the sake of your friendship.
that was the reason why you were angry and had hurt yourself. you hated the way you felt about your best friend and you hated the pandemic for not giving you an outlet to escape so you could recollect yourself.
what you weren't aware of was that kevin was no stranger to the exact same frustration.
he would need more than his ten fingers and ten toes to be able to count the amount of times he had to run to the bathroom to hide his boner because he had done so much as look at you bend over or stretch. he didn't want to make you uncomfortable but it was a challenge to try and calm down his hormones.
whenever he jacked off, images of you flashed through his mind; your sweet curves and pink lips drove him insane.
last week, you two were cooking together and you had asked him to get the salt. he stood behind you to reach for it on the highest shelf. he was forced to press his crotch against your butt cheeks and his dick hardened against his will. he quickly handed you the salt, excused himself and ran off before you could figure out what had happened.
he might not have known the cause of your sudden outburst but he sympathized with your fury because he had a lot of pent up anger towards covid as well.
he lay in his bed and tried to focus on the book he was reading but he couldn't tune out the groans coming from the room next to his. he cursed.
'stop it!' he was panicking as he saw a familiar tent forming in his pants. your sounds triggered some weird perverted part of his brain that sent signals right to his genitals. his dick was hardening and he saw no other solution to his problem than to give in to his subconscious desires.
he pulled down his pants just far enough so that his cock had enough room to spring out. it only needed a few strokes before it stood tall and angry. kevin pressed his head into his pillow and moved his hand fast. he wanted to get over with it quickly. he emptied his cum on his stomach while imagining your greedy little mouth being stuffed by his cock. he lay there panting as yet another round of shame flushed over him.
'get yourself together,' he whispered, mentally slapping himself.
***
'do you want to order japanese or italian?' you asked kevin. today was friday which meant it was time for your weekly tradition of ordering take out and watching a movie.
'definitely italian. we've already had japanese for the past four days. I need something else for a change,' kevin complained and shuddered at the thought of having to eat sushi again. the japanese restaurant prepared absolutely delicious food but he just couldn't stand it anymore.
you laughed at his pained facial expression. 'fine, italian it is.'
within twenty minutes the doorbell rang and after about half a minute kevin came back with two huge boxes.
he opened them on the small table situated in front of your couch and the smell of freshly cooked pasta seasoned with basil made your stomach growl.
kevin wanted to dig in already but you stopped him. you had to choose a movie first.
'let's watch tall girl. I saw everyone hate on it on tiktok,' you suggested.
'I think we should watch 365 days, that was all over my for you page as well,' kevin argued. you hadn't heard of it so you weren't sure whether it would be the right movie for you. the rule was that it had to be as bad as possible.
'according to what I have heard, it's apparently even worse than 50 shades of grey,' kevin added which piqued your interest. the both of you had watched 50 shades about two months ago and you were honestly shocked by how awful it actually was. you couldn't understand why everyone had been so obsessed with it when it was first released. if 356 days was really worse, then you'd hit the jackpot. you clapped your hands.
'fine, you win. I swear if the movie isn't as horrible as you say it is then you owe me something!' he intertwined his pinky with yours to promise.
watching horrible movies was way better than watching good ones. making fun of bad storylines, stupid characters or horrible editing was one of your favorite past times.
'I guess I'll have to add are you lost, baby girl to the top 10 worst lines ever spoken. who thought ah yes this is sexy, let's have him repeat it over and over again', you complained, shoving some pasta into your mouth.
'so he's like I won't do anything without your permission while he is literally groping her boobs against her will, like make it make sense, massimo', added kevin, ruffling his hair in frustration. he almost completely forgot about the food.
'so let me get this straight: he drugged her, kidnapped her, tied her up, hung up a painting of her just because he saw her face when his dad was shot?'
'totally relatable.' both of you giggled.
you were enjoying complaining about the plot. it was horrible.
there were plenty of erotic scenes but they were honestly so funny and kinda gross that you could bare it without really being affected by them. kevin, on the other hand, had placed a pillow over his hard-on to hide the embarrassing fact that these terrible, smutty scenes had turned him on.
and then the infamous boat scene came.
massimo and laura had a huge fight, she fell of the boat, he saved her and now she was suddenly so in love with him that she begs him to fuck her. which he does.
you felt your panties become increasingly wet as the couple had steaming hot sex.
'this is embarrassing but I'm so horny,' you admitted but in a way that should have suggested that you meant it as a joke. something about this statement stirred something in kevin.
'well, what can I say?' he replied and lifted the pillow. your pupils widened at the sight of your best friend's bulge.
his eyes darkened and he looked at you with lust clearly written on his face. you reciprocated his stare with the same intensity. you tried to focus on his dark brown orbs instead of his boner but the image you had just seen was present in your mind.
his gaze shifted to your lips and, before you knew it, kevin climbed above you and pressed your back flat onto the couch.
your lips locked and you immediately buried your hands in his hair to pull him closer. you moved in sync, his lips fitting perfectly onto yours. you bucked your hips up against his crotch and earned a moan from kevin. he opened his eyes in shock as realization hit him. he quickly pulled away and jumped off the coach.
'I'm so sorry, y/n. I shouldn't have just done that. I don't know what came over me,' he apologized profusely, staring at his feet. did he really think that you didn't want this?
'give me your hand,' you told him and held out your hand.
'why?' he raised his eyebrows in confusion. you rolled your eyes.
'just do it.'
you took his hand and led it to your crotch.
'what are you- oh my god.' your juices had completely soaked through your panties and your sweatpants. 'you are so wet.'
'for you,' you added. 'there's no need to apologize. I'm literally begging you to continue.'
you didn't have to say that twice before he pulled you closer to him by your hips and engaged you in another desperate kiss. his hands were groping your butt while you let yours slide under his hoodie. you felt his naked skin and toned abs, as you rubbed his stomach. you lowered your hands and bravely palmed his boner through his clothes.
'y/n,' he hissed out against your lips. you hooked your thumbs in the elastic of his pants and underwear, and pushed the material down to his thighs. he struggled to get them off.
you stroked his hard dick as he slipped his hand into your panties to massage your pussy at the same time.
he slipped one finger inside and began working it in and out. you finally were getting the relief you had been desperately craving for for so long. kevin was skilled and your walls were trying to swallow his slim finger. you were quickly coming close to your orgasm after having abstained for more than a year. you pulled his hand out.
'I bet you can make me come even better with your dick,' you challenged kevin.
'you bet I will.' he was confident.
'let me just look for a condom.' he was already turning away to go search in his room but you held him back by the arm.
'forget about it. I'm on the pill and I want you raw. I want you to come inside me and not spill into a stupid condom.'
the idea of this sounded very tempting to kevin. he picked you up and threw you back onto the couch, drawing your hips closer to him so he could pull off all the pieces of clothing that were hindering him from accessing your pussy.
he propped up his arms next to your sides and spread your thighs apart. strings of arousal were hanging from your folds and he saw your hole desperately clench around nothing. his dick hurt from how much he wanted to finally be inside of you. he wanted to find out how close he had been able to imagine how you would feel around him.
your hole took him in easily, welcoming him happily by embracing it tightly. kevin swore he could've cum right here and there.
he went slow at first to give you a chance to adjust but you were already fully ready, rocking your hips forward to meet his thrusts.
he crashed your mouths together and you kissed him like he was oxygen and you were short of air. you smiled and your eyes rolled back, satisfied with how things had played out today and the prospects of coming looked fairly promising.
desperate for release, kevin picked up the pace, his eyes closed while fucking into you like a horny animal. he couldn't help himself and all the 'faster's and 'harder's spilling from your mouth only encouraged him to drive himself deeper into you.
you wrapped your legs around his torso in an attempt to regain the control you were losing.
'fuck fuck fuck,' you cursed, feeling your muscles starting to contract. kevin brushed away some hair that was stuck to your sweaty forehead.
'it's fine, I'm coming too,' he announced and it took only a few more thrusts before a body shaking orgasm flushed over you, making you see only white. this drove kevin over the edge too and he spilled inside you, filling you up with his hot cum. he continued to slowly ease his dick in and out of you, fucking his semen right back into you until you had ridden out both of your orgasms. he let himself fall onto the couch right next to you, panting hard.
'I very much needed this,' you sighed in content.
'same, I wasn't sure whether I could hold out any longer without having a proper orgasm.' he watched his cum drip out of you.
'we should've thought of this sooner,' you said. 'this was a great idea.'
kevin hummed in agreement.
***
so now you and kevin were having sex on a regular basis, your high score being five times in a day. it felt good to finally live out your sexuality and not having to restrict yourself. sure, you guys did it more than necessary but it was a great way to pass time and it felt fucking amazing.
today you had done it in the shower after waking up, then on the kitchen counter and you had just finished having sex in his bed.
he was spooning you from behind, his cock still placed inside of you. he nuzzled his nose into your neck.
'stop, that tickles,' you chuckled.
'sorry.'
after a while of comfortable silence you heard him let out a big sigh.
'what's wrong?' you asked as he pulled out of you. you turned around to be able to look at him.
'I don't think I can do it like this anymore,' he confessed.
'what do you mean?' you asked. 'are you talking about us having sex?'
he nodded. your heart dropped and you started feeling dizzy. you tried to search for answers in his eyes but he avoided looking at you.
'w-why?' you stuttered, trying to hold back the tears that were welling up in your eyes.
'it was amazing at first,' he started and finally raised his head to meet your gaze, 'and I went into it without much thought. I went crazy during quarantine and began fantasizing about having sex with you. then it became reality but now I understand that was probably wrong of me. I've always thought of myself as a gentleman, yet I slept with you without much thought. you see, my issue is this…'
suspense hung in the air and you were impatiently waiting for him to get to the point.
'I like you.'
you quietly gasped in surprise. you had been expecting him to say you were bad at sex and that he regretted everything but not this.
'I shouldn't be sleeping with you unless you were my girlfriend,' he finished off his ramble. you felt immensely relieved.
'do you want me to?' you asked him.
'want you to what?' kevin was confused. he had been a hundred percent sure you'd immediately jump out of the bed in disgust when he confessed.
'be your girlfriend. after all, I like you too, you moron.' you realized that you had known this for a while. you might have even been crushing on your best friend since way before the pandemic struck but it was kind of hard to track your feelings. still, you were sure you liked him too. now that he had admitted his feelings, you were able to admit yours not only to him but to yourself as well.
'wow, I didn't expect this,' kevin confessed surprised. you laughed.
'yeah, we should've realized this sooner.' he pulled you closer and kissed you. it was different than the other times. his lips moved softly against yours, in contrast to all of your rough and passionate kisses you had exchanged these past few weeks. he conveyed his emotions through the kiss.
'you're ready again?' you groaned as you felt kevin's dick harden against your upper thigh. he chuckled.
'sorry, you just turn me on so much.'
so then you did it for the fourth time. that day, you set a new record of having sex six times. you might have been happy now but still just as horny.
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Note
First of all, love your writing, perfect for some binge reading!
I was wondering if you could do a little fic about Harry noticing all the little anxiety tics that you have (bouncing a knee, picking at fingers, etc) and maybe one time where he like helps you stop doing them and calms you down or something? I would love anything you do with this request so go off I guess! 💕
well first of all i love YOU😚😚😚 thank you so much! hope you like it :)
restless legs
warnings: anxiety, mild panic
word count: 1.6k
Harry was very perceptive. He noticed little things about you that others didn't, like when he surprised you with a gift you had only glanced at in a store window when walking past. You had no idea how he managed to be so observant, but you definitely appreciated it. It was nice when he understood you were ready to go home before you even said anything, or how he could always tell when you had a bad day and needed comfort.
He could also tell when you were anxious, especially because you had a few tells he had noticed. Like now, when you were sitting across the table from him at his favorite restaurant. It was one of the first times the two of you had gone out in public together, since he wasn't big on the idea of everyone knowing he was dating someone and you weren't big on the idea of thousands of people knowing who you were. But tonight, Harry had asked if you would come out with him. It was your 6 month anniversary, and he said he would feel bad if he didn't do something special for you. So you agreed, not realizing how stressful it would actually be. Which led to tonight, when your leg was bouncing a hundred miles a minute and you had picked off nearly all your nail polish. You felt terrible for not being able to focus on Harry, but it was hard to pay attention to him when you could feel people looking at you. Harry knew how anxious public situations like this could make you, so he did everything he could to make it easier. He had requested to be seated in the back corner of the restaurant, and he had you sit with your back facing the room so you wouldn't have to see anyone else. He booked the reservation for a Tuesday night to avoid the weekend busyness, and he even arranged for the two of you to come in the back door so the paparazzi wouldn't spot you coming in. Despite all this, you were a nervous wreck, and he could tell.
"Are you okay, love? If it's too much we can go home," he offered, a concerned look on his face.
"No, I'm fine," you shook your head. You had made up your mind that you were not going to bail again. You had already done that in the middle of three other dates, and you felt terrible every time. He always reassured you that it was fine, but you were worried he would start to get annoyed. "I'm just... I'm hungry." Hopefully he would believe that your fidgeting was because of impatience, not anxiety.
"You don't have to lie," his face softened. "Are you sure? I promise I won't be upset if you want to go home."
By now you had picked all your nail polish off and moved on to pulling at your cuticles. Harry saw this and reached across the table to still your hands, smiling gently. "What do you think?"
"I want to stay," you said decisively. "I don't want to bail again."
"Don't just do it for me," he said, not letting go of your hands. "If you need-"
"I'm fine," you cut him off. "Thank you, but I'm okay."
"Okay," he smiled again, looking down at the menu. "So what sounds good?"
"Uh... i have no idea," you said, looking down at your own menu. "I'm just gonna order whatever you do."
"Sounds good," he laughed. "I was thinking the chicken cordon bleu crepes, they're excellent here," he said thoughtfully, scanning the paper in front of him.
"I have no idea what that is," you replied. "But I trust your taste, so I'll go with it."
Just then, the waiter came over to take your orders. Harry ordered for you, since he knew that was another thing that made you anxious. You squeezed his hand gently and thanked the waiter when he took your menus.
Once the waiter was gone, you looked up at Harry with a small smile. "Thank you for that, I know it's kind of silly that it stresses me out that much just to order food."
"It's not silly," he frowned. "If it's a big deal for you, it's a big deal for me. I want to do everything I can to make you comfortable." He trailed off at the end of his sentence, his eyes focusing on a point somewhere behind you.
You furrowed your brow in confusion. "What's-"
"Looks like they found us," he sighed. Your eyes went wide and you turned quickly to see what he was talking about. There was a huge group of people crowded outside the front door and windows, yelling and pushing each other and trying to take pictures through the glass. You turned back around quickly, heart rate spiking as you processed what you had seen.
"It's okay, honey, they can't get in," he assured you. "They probably can't even see us."
You both knew that was a lie, but you appreciated his effort to comfort you.
It wasn't enough, though.
"No, they can see us, otherwise why would they be going crazy?" you asked, your breathing becoming unsteady. "This is not good- Harry they're going to take pictures of us and-"
"Hey, hey, it's okay," he said, thankfully staying calm even though you were on the verge of panicking. "Why don't I go talk to the manager, they'll get everything sorted out-"
"No! Don't leave me here," you said quickly, your hand tightening around his.
"Okay, I'm not going anywhere," he promised. "Let me just..." he waved his free hand at the waiter, gesturing him over. "Can i speak with someone about the situation outside?" He asked, politely but firmly.
"Yes, right away sir," the waiter nodded quickly.
"They'll take care of it," he soothed, stroking his thumb over the back of your hand. "You're alright, it's going to be fine."
The manager walked over to your table, looking frustrated and apologetic. "I am so sorry for the mess outside, our security is working on it, and we will alert the authorities if needed," he said, wringing his hands. "Your meal is on the house tonight, of course, and please let me know if you need anything else."
"Oh, that's not necessary-" Harry started, but the other man interrupted.
"No, no, it's on us. This should not have happened, someone must have tipped them off that you were here. Again, my sincerest apologies. Is there anything you need?"
"No, we're alright, thank you," Harry smiled politely.
The man nodded before leaving the two of you alone again.
The crowd outside had finally begun to disperse, but you weren't feeling any calmer. Your heart was still racing, and it was difficult to draw a full breath. On top of that, everyone else in the room was staring at you now. Before it had just been glances here and there, but now all eyes were on you and Harry.
"I'm not feeling well," you said shakily. Your leg was bouncing enough to shake the table and he could feel your hand trembling in his. "I need-"
Harry could tell that you were staring to panic, so he took action quickly. He stood up, moving his chair around the table and setting it next to yours. He sat down and put his arm around you, breathing deeply and evenly to calm you down.
"You're alright," he said quietly, leaning in to kiss your temple. "Just breathe with me."
You tried your best to follow his instructions, your shaky breaths slowly beginning to match his measured ones.
"That's it, my good girl," he whispered against your skin. He could still feel your leg jumping up and down, so he placed his other hand over it, stilling it with a gentle pressure. "You're doing good, baby, just focus on me. Nobody else matters, we're the only ones here right now."
You nodded lightly, leaning against him for support. "Right, they don't matter," you repeated. "It's just us."
"Just us," he smiled gently. "That's right."
-----
Harry stayed next to you for the whole dinner, never moving his hand from your leg. When it was time to go he put his jacket around your shoulders and his arm around your waist, leading you out of the restaurant and into the car.
"I'm sorry for freaking out in there, i just got kind of scared and-"
"Baby, you don't ever have to feel bad about that," he said, pulling you closer to him. "I'm sorry it even happened, it shouldn't have."
"It's okay, I know i have to get used to it, it's just hard," you said quietly.
"I know it is," he sighed. "I wish you didn't have to deal with it at all. I can't have the crazies scaring you away from me," he laughed, leaning down to kiss your cheek.
"They won't scare me away, i like you way too much for that."
"That's good, because I like you even more."
You smiled, leaning your head against his chest to listen to his heartbeat. "I love you," you said quietly.
"I love you too." He smoothed his hand over your hair and tightened his arm around you. He looked down, smiling when he noticed that for the first time in weeks, your legs were still.
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lis-likes-fics · 3 years
Text
Exhilarated
Pairing: Carlisle Cullen x Reader Word Count: 4,602 words heheh Warnings: Car crash (again), smut Author's Note: Took too long because I'm ✨inconsistent✨.
~~~~~
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Y/N sighed deeply as she drove down the dark road, headed back home from out of town. A friend of hers had invited her to her birthday party and she accepted, reassuring Carlisle that she would stay safe while she was out. He had promised her that he would always be by her side, and he took the promise to heart. He was reluctant to let her go by herself, but she convinced him that she would be alright.
Now she was on her way home to Carlisle. She was peering through her windshield when her phone began ringing beside her, the sound was loud and it startled her. She tore her attention away from the road for a moment to decline the phone call, she'd pick it up when she stopped.
Y/N looked back up to the road, cursing loudly when she saw a deer beginning to cross the road. She yanked on the steering wheel, swerving out of the way of the deer that had frozen in the street, staring at the lights that flashed at it.
The car jerked over, just missing the deer. Y/N slammed on the breaks as hard as she could and the car skid across the road. She crashed into a tree, the airbag deploying and smacking Y/N in the face, disorienting her for a moment.
It when she smelled the gas when she knew she had to get out of the car as fast as possible. Her heart pounded in her chest, she could hear her pulse in her ears. She opened her door, struggling to move her legs as she looked down. She groaned when she saw her foot stuck in the car, preventing her from moving.
She wiggled her feet out of her shoes and managed to get her legs out of the car. Just as she was out of the car, the vehicle blew, throwing her in the air from the impact of the explosion.
She let out a strangled yelp when she landed on hard, rolling over the ground before being abruptly halted by smacking another tall tree. Another cry escaped her as she felt a terrible pain in her lower back that soon spread all over her body. She was sure something was broken, and it was something vital. Blood soon started dropping her mouth, creating a bad taste in her mouth.
As if she'd be able to summon him, she choked out a strangled call, "Carlisle…" Her voice was barely audible or understandable, but she didn't stop. She needed him. Her body hurt so badly, she was in need of his aid.
However, it seemed as though he could hear her calls as a black Mercedes came racing down the road to get to her, screeching to a stop before the door was opened and Carlisle was coming out to her within the next second.
He was kneeling at her side, looking her over with worried eyes as he spoke, "What is it with you and cars?"
She chuckled weakly, wincing and coughing up more blood. "I'm sorry," her voice cracked as she got the words out. He shook his head, placing a hand on her cheek, "It's not your fault, dear."
He continued looking her over, trying to make note of everything wrong. She spoke, struggling to get the words out of her mouth, "Carlisle, I can't m-move my legs."
Carlisle acknowledged her words, "I'm going to move you onto your stomach, okay?" She gave him a nod and allowed him to do so. He felt around her back along her spine, asking her questions about how it felt and what happened.
At the end of his assessment and her recap, he let out  a heavy breath and gave her a sad look. She couldn't comprehend it, she had started to fade in and out of focus, looking around her surroundings.
When she hit her back so hard on the tree, it fractured part of her spine and paralyzed her from the waist down. Along with that, she was bleeding internally and he knew she wouldn't have enough time before she actually passed out. He knew it would be bad if she passed out, it wouldn't end well at all.
And he couldn't lose her.
With glazed eyes, Y/N turned her scarce attention to Carlisle, "What's….wrong?"
Her breath had become heavy, the other effects of the accident were starting to sink in. Carlisle looked her in the eyes, as if he was memorizing every detail in them. She weakly moved an arm with the intention of placing her hand on his cheek. He took her hand in his, holding it to his cheek as he savored the warmth of her hand.
"Carlisle-?" His name was interrupted by a painful cough that riddled through her. He told her with a sad voice, crying without tearing up. "I don't think you're going to make it. You got hurt really badly."
She wasn't concerned about herself, she was concerned about him. She didn't want to leave him alone, she didn't want to leave his side after promising a million times a day that she never would.
Fresh tears stained her face to cover the old ones, not from physical pain but from emotional pain. "I'm not leaving you," she whispered in a hoarse voice.
He sighed and nodded, "I know. You'd never forgive me if I let you, and I'd never forgive myself if I let you."
She knew what he was getting at. For a moment, she was scared of the physical pain that would come with his cure, but the fear ceased when it was challenged with the despair of even the thought of leaving Carlisle's side.
She gave a weak smile and nodded, "Do it…"
He had a pained expression on his face as he considered the option again. It was the only option where she would come out alive-- or at least for the most part.
Carlisle stroked the side of her face with his thumb, gazing over her features as he looked past the injuries, looking at her true self as if it was the last time he'd see it.
He whispered in a clear but saddened voice, "I'm going to miss these eyes." She smiled at him, swallowing thickly.
Carlisle lifted her head carefully, kissing her deeply with as much meaning as he could without hurting her further. She kissed him back, it was one thing she could focus on fully with her mind slipping in and out of attention.
He whispered in her ear, "I'm so sorry."
She shook her head and told him in a broken voice, "I love you."
He kissed the side of her face, "I love you, too."
He braced himself before finally biting into her neck, his teeth piercing the skin and drawing blood. He fought off his urge to suck her dry quite well, more focused on saving her than he was on tasting her blood.
Y/N inhaled sharply, a strangled sound caught in her throat as she tried her hardest to hold in her scream. She could feel the venom already spreading over her body, burning her up from the inside out with such excruciating pain.
When Carlisle finished, he wiped his mouth and gazed at her painfully. He hated seeing her in pain, he hated seeing her looking so broken.
Try as she did, she couldn't stop the cries from leaving her body. Carlisle wiped at her tears as she squeezed her eyes shut tight, every fiber of her being struggling through the pain.
It felt like she had been lit on fire, for a moment she thought she would be hurting like this forever. She screamed and writhed in unbridled pain, her body jerking all over the place as she clenched and stretched her fingers repeatedly.
She almost wished the bottom half of her body stayed paralyzed, but she decided not to. It was better to go through the pain and spend eternity with Carlisle than it was to die and leave him without the love of his life.
Y/N opened her eyes, forcing a breath out of her lunges before sucking another back in. Her eyes fell on Carlisle. She found some remedy, thought very little, for the pain as she looked into his eyes. Beyond the agony he felt for putting you through such pain, she could see the love he felt for her that justified the physical pain.
It was that love that made him strong enough to do what he needed to do.
She didn't know how long she would be in this state-- it was different for everyone-- but she knew it would be worth it if it meant she would get to spend forever with him.
~
Y/N had been moved by Carlisle to his home, they couldn't stay out in the middle of nowhere while she was turning. In the safety of the home, she continued through the change.
She felt bad for putting everyone through the ordeal of having to listen to her pained screams as she turned. They wouldn't blame her for that, of course. They knew the pain she was in, they'd endured it before. That didn't stop her from feeling like she was burdening them. If only she'd been a little more careful, they wouldn't have to go through the mess that is changing.
While Edward could hear the thoughts she was having while she turned, he wasn't in the room to dissuade her from thinking those thoughts. Carlisle was right by her side the entire time. He refused to leave her, nothing his children could say would make him for even a second.
They eventually had to move Jasper out of the house. Her change was affecting him because, along with the physical pain, she was going through the emotional pain of having to watch Carlisle watch her turn. It hurt her to cause him any pain and Jasper wasn't holding up because of it.
She was in transformation for four days.
If she hadn't known physical pain before, she definitely did now. While changing made her exhausted, once she was a vampire, the exhaustion disappeared into a drained feeling.
She looked around the room, as if seeing everything for the first time. She could see every small detail in everything she laid eyes on.
She felt this strange feeling in her throat and chest, as if something was wrong, something was going against her natural instinct.
She finally put a finger on it when she realized she hadn't started breathing yet. She didn't need to, so she hadn't realized it when she didn't.
She took in a deep breath, her chest rising and falling. She could smell so many different things at one time: the trees outside, the fresh morning dew, each distinctive smell of each person throughout the entire house.
She listened closely to the sounds around her, the quiet shuffles of the residents in the house, the chips of birds outside, the light breathing of someone sat next to her.
She turned her head to look at the person next to her. A smile spread across her face as she gazed at him, looking at every small detail of his face, listening to every breath he took as he watched her with his own large smile.
"Hey," he spoke, his voice barely above a whisper but perfectly audible to her. She felt as though she might cry as she stared back at him, she was so glad to see him, even if she was with him for the past four days. She was seeing him clearly, there were no tears in her eyes.
She overestimated the amount of strength she needed to use as she got off the bed Carlisle had in his room solely for her and hugged him, straddling his waist as she buried her face in his neck, holding him a little too tight.
He let out a hearty laugh at her enthusiasm, holding her to him just as tightly. She took a deep breath in, inhaling his scent and memorizing it instantly. He was perfect in every single way.
She gripped him tight, carefully not to break him as she tried not to underestimate her strength. She breathed a sigh of contentment.
When she finally let go, it was only enough so she could kiss him. As soon as their lips touched, she sighed. The kiss alone was exhilarating.
She intertwined her fingers in his hair, letting out a soft moan against his lips. His lips tasted sweet, it was a taste she'd never experienced, but she liked it-- loved it, even.
When she pulled away, it was strange to not be gasping for breath. If she were human, she would have been.
She smiled back at him again with loving eyes, "Carlisle." She was surprised by her own voice, it was clear and seemingly perfect in every way. Carlisle watched in admiration as she experienced these things as if for the first time.
She looked back at him, "I sound…"
"Beautiful," he finished with a smile, "as always."
He kissed her again, wrapping his arms more securely around her as he stood, setting her on her feet as he pulled away. He grabbed her hand, guiding her to the bathroom connected to his room, despite him not needing to use it.
Carlisle pulled her in front of the mirror, his arms wrapping around her waist from behind and his head lying in the crook of her neck. She held his arms around her, locking her fingers with his as she stared at her reflection.
It seemed as though all of her imperfections before had been corrected, painting this perfect version of herself that actually seemed to compliment Carlisle now.
Her skin was smooth like silk, her hair was styled to perfection, despite the mess it was in, her crimson eyes were deep but they shone like stars. Even if they were yet to be the honey gold of Carlisle's eyes, they were still strangely appealing to gaze into.
She had always felt like she didn't look right next to him, she felt out of sorts. He seemed like a perfect sculpture carved from the most divine marble while she was a jugged wood carving placed next to him.
Now she looked as flawless as she did, she felt like she finally completed this perfect pair they seemed to form.
She turned her attention to Carlisle, his eyes trained on her face as she looked at him through the mirror. She smiled at him, turning in his arms to lay a hand on his cheek.
She went to kiss him again, but was suddenly distracted by a burning in her throat that made her reach to touch it. Carlisle nodded lightly, "You need to feed."
She sighed softly and nodded, taking his hand in hers and allowing him to lead her out of the house. As they walked downstairs hand in hand, the Cullens were all downstairs waiting.
She paused next to Carlisle, moving her free hand to hold their intertwined hands. She felt strange under their looks like this, like there was something wrong with her. She tensed under the eyes, a strange feeling rising in her as she grew anxious. There was this strange instinct in her that made her feel threatened, thus moving her to be hostile.
But before these instincts could properly kick in, they were smiling at her and rushing over to give her hugs. She was startled for a moment when Alice rushed into her arms happily, slightly squealing at her. She settled and hugged her back, eventually exchanging hugs with everyone in the coven before getting a giant bear hug from Emmett-- and she expected nothing less than that.
They gave her a proper welcome into the coven, expressing how happy they were that she was alright. Before she could strike up some conversation, Carlisle pulled her away so she could feed. "You can catch up afterwards," he smiled at Y/N.
~
Y/N found that she wasn't clumsy anymore. It was as if being a vampire cured everything wrong with her and made her this perfect woman. It made her feel like she was actually worth Carlisle's time now. She never said anything before, she didn't feel like it was appropriate to, but she always believed that she was far less than Carlisle. She never believed she was really that valuable, Carlisle's reassurances could only last her for so long.
After teaching Y/N how to properly hunt, they returned home. She was smiling the whole way, happy with her new self as she walked with Carlisle.
A few days passed and Carlisle started to notice she felt a lot happier than she had when she was human. He was curious to know why the change was such a big one, she was brighter, more radiant, as if things were finally working out for her.
One night while everyone was out feeding, Carlisle and Y/N were still at home together. He questioned her, "You're happier than you used to be. Even Jasper can feel the difference."
She shrugged, "I am." The simple response was enough to make Carlisle push on. "Why weren't you this happy before?"
Y/N looked at him, her red eyes staring into his golden ones before she sighed. "I'm different now. Before I was this clumsy, accident-prone, mediocre girl and now I actually feel…strong."
Carlisle took her hand in his, bringing it up to kiss the back of it, "Y/N."
She nodded, "I know, I know. I wasn't mediocre before, and I'm not mediocre now. I'll always be special to you."
He chuckled lightly before licking his lips, "Why did you think you were mediocre?"
She shrugged and sighed, "I mean…you literally look like a perfect specimen, like a beautiful statue. I…didn't. I was unimpressive and boring. But now I'm strong and I'm beautiful and…I'm perfect now."
Carlisle said exactly what she thought he would, but it somehow still managed to hit home with her.
"Y/N," he said, "when you were human, I cherished you for what you were. I still cherish you for what you are. Do you want to know something? The only difference I see between you now and you then are the color of your eyes. You were always beautiful, you were always strong, you were always perfect, and you always will be. To be honest, I do miss the clumsiness."
She chuckled at the last part, kissing his cheek, "Yeah, because arriving at the ER at least once every two weeks was fun."
"It amazed me how much one human could get hurt in a month," he replied, a soft laugh erupting from his chest.
Y/N smiled brightly and sighed. Perhaps she was hard on herself. All of her self-doubt wouldn't disappear in one night, but perhaps it would over her time with Carlisle. He would definitely do everything in his power to make sure she knew her worth.
She leaned over to him, kissing him gently before smiling and telling him genuinely, "I love you, Carlisle."
"I love you," he smiled. He took her face in his hands, kissing her lips softly. She moved so that she was sitting in his lap, happy to be with him, as always.
Carlisle's hands smoothed over her back, his touch was soothing over her skin. She pulled away from his lips, her eyes closed, her mind focused on his hands on her. It was such a soothing and exhilarating feeling. Her skin tingled wherever his hands dragged as he watched her sigh in pleasure.
Her voice was feathery as she spoke, "What's happening?"
His smile was one of adoration, "Your senses are stronger. You can feel every touch, smell every scent, hear every sound, taste every taste, and see every sight on a higher level."
She nodded, "That makes sense." She'd never felt anything like this. But, to be fair, she'd never been in a relationship as close and intimate as with Carlisle-- or anywhere near it.
She leaned forward again, her head in the crook of his neck as she pressed her body against his. "Do it more," she whispered.
And he did. His hand glided over her skin, grazing her up her back, over her shoulders, and down her arms. His hands gripped her, his thumbs brushing her skin, before moving back up her arms and down her sides.
Y/N turned her head and kissed his neck. Carlisle's eyes fluttered closed, his hands grazing down her outer thighs, moving back up and starting over running up her back.
She adjusted herself so she straddled his waist, locking her legs behind him. She loved being this close to him, he always felt so wonderful.
"How do you feel?" He asked her in his honey smooth voice.
She smiled, "Really good." She leaned forward, her hands cupping his face affectionately before kissing him again. He hands supported her back, pulling her impossibly close.
He stood, his arms wrapping around her waist to carry her. Laying her gently on the bed, he kissed her more desperately than he had before. Y/N sighed, moving her arms to wrap around his neck.
With every second, her need for him at that moment became more than just for care. She wanted him, needed him. With every kiss, her carnal need for him grew stronger.
Carlisle didn't need to be a mind reader to know what she was thinking. He whispered into her ear, the words so delicate in the air, "Say the words, and I'm yours."
She moaned lightly, nodding her head before giving him another kiss, "I want you, I want this. Please make me yours."
He smiled, kissing her hastily. His hands moved down her sides, gripping her waist as he pressed his thumbs into them. She grabbed his shirt, initially going to take it off of him before deciding to just rip it from his body completely.
He found that amusing as he allowed the piece of fabric to fall to the floor. He chuckled lightly, shifting her to move farther onto the bed. His hands pulled down her pants eagerly. He let them drop to the floor, kicking them out of his way.
She watched him intently, her eyes clouded with lust. He smiled at her and snuck his hands into her panties, rubbing her clit expertly.
She sucked in a breath, gripping the sheets for dear life as she let out a loud moan. Carlisle couldn't believe his eyes at the sight, it was beautiful, she was beautiful.
His finger moved quickly, applying just the right amount of force. Her legs tightened around his waist, pulling him close to her. He moved back over her and kissed her again, swallowing her moans hungrily.
It was ridiculous how fast he made her reach the edge. She was getting close to meeting her release and all he did was kiss and touch her. If she was this sensitive, she could only imagine what he would feel like inside of her.
She was getting so hot thinking about it.
"Carlisle," she moaned before he stopped his ministrations, he knew how close she was. She whined and he told her in a surprisingly seductive tone, "I love the way you look when you get close, but I don't want you to come yet."
She couldn't believe his words as she looked at him pleadingly. She was so ready for him. She was so ready to feel him.
She reached down his pants, undoing his belt eagerly. His eyes closed momentarily before he looked back at her, his eyes liquid gold as he gazed at her. When she had his pants down, she palmed him through his underwear, moaning lightly.
Carlisle groaned at her contact, kissing her neck and earning a sharp gasp from her. One hand went back to his head, holding him down next to her. Her other hand continued before going to take off his boxers entirely.
She let out a soft sigh when she saw his impressive length. He wasn't small, that was for sure. He let out a sigh of his own before whispering in her ear, "Are you sure?"
She bit her lip, kissing his cheek before telling him, "Carlisle, I love you. I want to share everything with you, especially…"
Carlisle glanced at her after her hesitation. "Especially what?" He asked.
She sucked on her lip before admitting, "Especially my first time."
He shared a long, meaningful look with her. He kissed her again. Despite the disheveled state they were in, the kiss was slow and sensual and managed to convey their love for each other with such depth. When he pulled back, he gave one last look to her before she nodded confidently.
He contained eyed contact with her before sliding inside slowly. She threw her head back, closing her eyes and gasping. She let out a loud exclamation as he buried himself deep within her. He groaned into her skin.
He pulled out slowly until he was left with just the tip inside of her before pushing himself back inside. She wrapped her legs around his waist, so eager to keep him close. "Oh, please," she moaned.
Carlisle sighed, a sound so full of pleasure at hearing her voice pleaded for him like she was. His excitement exploded, he had to try and control himself.
Carlisle's breath picked up, he tried to keep himself on as much control as possible, doing his best to keep from pistoning in her.
However, when she got used to his impressive size, tightening her grip around his neck. "Oh, yes," she sighed, "More. Please, Carlisle, more."
He almost lost it when she said his name in such a way. He didn't realize just how much power she had over him until she moaned his name in her plea. He obliged to her pleas and his thrusts became faster and harder.
Her sounds filled the room and his sounds began to mix with hers from his excitement. She could feel a knot in her stomach as she felt herself getting closer to her release.
She cursed under her breath, moaning his name in his ear. Carlisle could feel her squeezing around him, which only spurred him on as his thrusts became more erratic. Her moans, her cries, her pleas, they were so seductively precious to him. He wanted to pull them from her night after night. He wanted to have her forever.
"I'm so close," she whispered, her mouth hanging open as she moaned out.
"I know," he said, "I can feel you."
She smiled, panting heavily as Carlisle thrusted into her so deliciously. He was getting so close, he was just at the edge of his release.
She sighed, the words sending them both over the edge with such force, "I love you, Carlisle."
They gasped, holding their breath as they finally reached their sweet release together. Y/N intertwined her fingers with his, kissing him deeply as she moaned into his mouth.
They chased their highs together, the feeling so intense, so euphoric, so exhilarating.
When they finally started to come down, he eased her through it. Their breaths mingled as they pulled away from the kiss. Carlisle pulled out of her. He brushed a thumb against her cheek, pulling her into another kiss.
She smiled, holding him impossibly close to her. When they pulled back from the kiss, Carlisle whispered, "I love you."
424 notes · View notes
jjkpls · 3 years
Text
the wishlist (m) - 3
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“You used it.”
> genre : smut, fluff
> pairing : jeon jungkook x reader (f)
> words : 4.2k
> content/warnings : back at it again w/ the bff2l; one sided love, lot of pining; sextoys talk and use; explicit language; masturbation (f); ambiguous infidelity; awkward oc; koo being cute but insufferable
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For about a week and a half, you simply ignore the outrageous box sitting in the centre of your living room.
If you omit to remember what’s inside, it’s just a nice-looking decoration, embellishing your messy coffee table. It’s perfectly fine sitting between the unopened mails and the takeout brochures. You see Jungkook glance at it each time he comes over but he has the decency to not mention it. You might have read a little disappointment but he didn’t share it with you, not wanting to bother you, as you rightfully assumed, and in any case, you’re just doing exactly what you said you would: not use it. 
Then comes a glorious day of resting from work for you, and miraculously it matches your two closest girl friends' schedules and they owe to come over, celebrate a belated Christmas with you. And as you’re quickly tidying up the place, the question of the box being way too present here is raised again. They will ask about it. One will surely open it before you even get to answer.
The box has to go. 
And in your room, hidden in your bedside table where you know no one will peak, it goes. 
When you wake up from the fantastic, long-awaited Christmas celebration, it’s with a terrible headache. Mary, the amateur singer, received a ridiculous karaoke mic and if karaoke is involved, so is alcohol. You didn’t know that but apparently, you can get a severe almost deadly hangover from rosé. Well. Starting this new year already learning new things, how great. 
One thing that’s unchanged for this new year, as it seems, is Jungkook's talent for psychic arts. He somehow knows you need a copious breakfast made with love and by him, and the curious hangover shot only his roommate has the secret recipe of, to cope with being alive this morning. 
“Hello, Sunshine.” Your face feels so bloated and tensed at the same time like it’s made of playdoh and some devilish kid came and punched at it then squished it hard with its chubby mean fingers.
Very unpleasant.
You know you have very little to do with a ray of sunshine at the moment. You're more alike a gremlin or something. Therefore, as a gremlin would, you groan an answer. You catch through the minuscule slits you now own for eyelids a grin from him. It’s not even vexing or upsetting. His lovely, lovely smile is always a blessing. It’s the only thing that makes you not want to head back to bed and just sleep until death ensues. The pretty, pretty thing. With the big bunny front teeth. He is the sunshine. 
“Had fun last night?” He asks, still grinning, once he’s served you and himself two good plates of pancakes. He’s sitting in front of you, in front of this delicious looking good, yet he’s ogling you with a strange insistence. When he starts eating because you take too long to formulate a response, he munches slowly, still staring, instead of stuffing his face and swallow down the whole thing like a starving man, like he usually does. 
“Yeah. They spoiled me.” You say, quietly. You’re confused. You feel uneasy like there’s something you’re not getting. You hate this feeling. Usually, this friendship is filled with inside jokes you can make up exclusively via telepathy. But here you’re missing something, it feels. Or you might just be confused by the headache and possibly somehow still a bit drunk. 
“Oh did they?” The beam is even wider. You frown, nod, decide that it’s too early and your brain too foggy to try and investigate a confusion that might just be the product of your imagination. 
It doesn’t click then. It doesn’t click the next three times he asks you again, with slightly different formulations if, really, you had fun last night. 
He departs an hour later because he has an appointment with a client, as always leaving some of himself for your guilty pleasure and the marking on your eyelids of that curious grin. That curious mischievous grin. With the crooked shape, the white teeth looking menacing like a wolve’s and the eyebrows arched in suggestion.
How come such an attractive look can be so anxiety-inducing? You’re too fidgety, too confused and concerned to focus on anything. Remnants of the conversation rolling back again and again, trying to make sense of things that probably do not necessitate further explaining. 
The whole ordeal made you so nervous, you end up after an hour of trying to go about your day and failing poorly, sitting on your sofa, lotus style, eyes closed and hands turned up to the universe (hoping It might offer you some clearance It would just drop off in your palms). The thing is meditating is hard. Making so your brain would shut the fuck up is hard as hell. And you suck at it. 
Spoiler alert, you don’t reach the state of inner peace and quiet you wished to find. Instead, you make enough silence for your noggins to be more performing and suddenly it hits. Your eyes grow ten times in size, you almost fall from your sit for the shock is violent.
The moron.
You or him, probably both. 
You
I did NOT use it.
You
I put it away because the girls were coming over but I DID NOT USE IT
He simply replies with a winking emoji and you hate him for it. 
You
Jeon Jungkook, ur a dick I said I wouldnt use it EVER and I won’t, have a nice day moron. 
And again, this time, you mean it. You’ve never said anything with this much conviction in these twenty-five years of living.
Why would you now? When you now have experienced what it felt to have him look at you thinking you’ve done it. It felt mortifying without even knowing why. In all the case scenarios you could have come up with, you’ve never imagined that one. You would use it, he would know about it somehow, he wouldn’t be disgusted (it wouldn’t make sense for him to be as he is the one who offered it to you but your brain and soft ego sometimes are annoying like that), he would be amused, maybe content, but he wouldn't make you feel mortified. 
Having him considering you in a sexual position should be... cool, shouldn’t it? If you really like him that much. Maybe you were confused all along and actually, you don’t, you mistook your own feelings. 
Just a quick check of a mental picture you have of him, the fond smile growing just from his pretty face with the pretty everything on it can’t be trusted because, for all you know, everyone smiles this way when they think about him. On the other hand, the swift blush invading your cheeks when you (by accident) linger on parts you really really like about him -like his thighs or the man titties he’s been growing lately- serve to remind you that yes, yes indeed you like him. 
But he’s an asshole.
No matter how much you thought about it (and you thought about it a lot even though you’re ashamed to admit it), you've never consider it to realize, you never and you still don’t believe anything non-platonic would ever happen with him. You’re just made to be friends. The best of friends but still just friends. 
Not even taking a step but simply dipping the tips of your toes in these unknown waters turns out to be terrifying and you're mad at him because he’s putting you in this situation where you feel awfully uneasy. 
It should all remain a very personal, very intimate fantasy: your attraction for him.
He cracked the wall for a second, it felt wrong and terrible but it’s done and over with now.
It’s only you and your thoughts. 
You don’t ever mention it, he doesn’t bring it back up. Soon the season of celebrations and wishes is behind you, the world starts rolling slowly, boringly so with its lots of little annoyances and distractions and you’re not even thinking about it anymore, neither is he. 
You’re stressed out. Work is being a bitch as it does. And because it sucks most of your time and patience, the only quick way to unwind you know comes to play. 
But the hassle is not worth it. Unfortunately this you always need to realize afterwards. After having searched the internet for good masturbatory content for half an hour, working yourself for two hours and then, there’s the safety wee and the freshening up before bed, to wake up the next morning feeling like shit because of course, you sacrificed hours of sleep for an unsatisfactory outcome.
It’s not worth it.
It hasn’t been for months. Even if you’re still more able to take care of yourself and pleasure yourself better than most if not all men you’ve ever been with, something is missing: a man (or maybe just a dick). 
You feel bored and empty (in both senses). Stuck because the more you need to unwind, the more you try, the less you feel better. 
It’s the snake biting its own tail. 
Until a certain pretty blue box, sleeping inside your bedside table, recalls itself to you. It feels like a century had passed since the box arrived in your life, it doesn’t seem as scary as it used to, as stressful. The fact that Jungkook hasn’t mentioned it, might even has himself forgotten about it, help immensely. 
And it is the very moment, you forget to remember about this promise you made to him and yourself, the promise that you would not use it. 
Right about now, not only stressed and annoyed by everything but also horny for no particular reason, this dildo with the box that matches your planner sounds ideal. 
And it is ideal.
Feels like exactly what you needed. The size is not ridiculously big, it’s fairly tiny actually but given you haven’t had sex in a while, it suffices to stretch you out just fine. It’s new and exciting. The texture feels really nice, smooth, slipping perfectly right between your walls. It’s rather long, slightly curved, filling you in deep and teasing the spot that you could never even dream of reaching with your short ass fingers. And in no time (and you actually regret that) you’re on cloud 9, it’s a thought of the Santa that brought this blessing of a gift in your life that sends you there. You feel satisfied, content, fulfilled from the tip of your hair to your toes, smiling like an idiot because damn, that was a good orgasm. 
Right this moment, you feel fine about using the present. About quickly having thought about him too because it’s not that much of a big deal. He won’t know about it. He doesn’t really seem to care about your sex life anymore (which is, ironically, a blessing). Therefore why should there be a problem? Why would there be?
Apparently, you’ve underestimated the crankiness of your attitude for the few weeks that passed before the phenomenal orgasm. 
Apparently, you had been the worst kind of truculent bitch there is, to a level you didn’t even know you could reach (also no one told you!), because when Jungkook meets up with you, maybe after the third or fourth times of having used your lovely new companion, he noticed something has changed. Instantly. 
“What’s going on?” He asks with a bright smile and excited shiny eyes as if he expects you to have great news to share. 
“Nothing special...” Tilting your head to the side, you drag the words out as you try to think about it for a second, wondering if there’s something that needs to be told.
“Really?” He sucks on his banana yoghurt with eyebrows frowned, staring at you as if he’s studying you. Once the thing is empty, he tosses it in a nearby bin, crosses his arms on his chest and glares. He looks like a detective about to interrogate you. He would look intimidating if it were not for his lips, sucked in to gather the last taste of his yoghurt. “You look awfully happy.”
“Do I?” It makes you smile, shrug your shoulders. It doesn’t hit just then. It should be fine. He can’t unravel something that you don’t even have knowledge of, can he? But Jungkook is a little weasel. He loves to know everything.
Especially when it’s about you. 
“You better not be seeing anyone-“ You should wonder where this is coming from, all of a sudden. Instead, you take offence, how dares he?
“What do you mean ‘I better’? I do what-“
“Without telling me? You better not.” He has that shit-eating grin, his signature brat's smile, because he knows you can’t reach over the table to smack him in the head without risking to tip over your drinks or dip your sleeve in soja sauce. 
“Anyway. Nothing's going on.” For a second, a staring contest takes place on this convenience store's terrace. You’re not sure why. He’s daring you for no reason. Until his mouth twitches, wanting to smile and it makes you laugh so he follows along. “Were you not supposed to tell me about your next appointment?” 
“Client Amy, yes!” It shouldn’t make you laugh to hear him name her like that as it’s been his trademark to mention his clients as if they were Pokémon trainers but it does.
You’ve always thought that it’s his very personal way of living this childhood fantasy of existing within the Pokémon universe. His life is full of potential trainers. Most of the time it’s just Client Enter the Name here but sometimes it’s Baker Jin -who’s not actually a baker but a salesman at his neighbourhood’s bakery-, there’s Dancer Hoseok, who’s the main dance partner of his best friend and Roommate Park Jimin. Sometimes he calls you Friend Y/N, it’s frustratingly funny. You hate that you spill at least a nose snort at each and every single one of his stupid jokes. His grin always grows ten times bigger, his eyes twinkle in a lovely way but you know that you are encouraging him. Encouraging him to be fucking annoying, like a little brother who’s just pushing unfunny jokes too far, just keep repeating them because he knows he can get a reaction. “She wants me to tattoo the dragon from Spirited Away on her arm-“
You gasp and he smiles even wider. 
“I know, right? And I was thinking- to give it flow, I would have it- like fly through cherry blossoms.” Attentively, you listen, squinting a bit when he gets technical to try and picture the project you have a hard time making up alone in your mind.
Imagination and creativity have always been his thing. He had you impregnated with it long ago because he is too passionate and too much of a sharer to allow you to keep away from all arts -because you can’t hold a pencil straight without panicking at the idea of having to draw something- which you would have gladly done if it weren't for him. He’s the gifted one. And his drawings, either on paper, screen or skin, have always been a subject of huge admiration for you. You’re a bit ashamed to admit it but you’ve never really touched to anything really artistic. You often don’t really get it. But his stuff does something to you -and not only because you adore him but actually impartially. There’s no finesse, no pertinency, no trait nor emotion you’ve acknowledged and connected to better than the ones he creates. “You know this scene where he’s struggling against the little paper thingies and he’s flying through them and they’re going everywhere, I was thinking that, replace them with cherry blossoms. And there would be little petals like everywhere around it. Sounds cool?”
“It sounds fantastic.” You say honestly. You’re impressed by every single one of his projects. Always surprised, somehow, by the pieces he ends up making. Sometimes scrolling through the Instagram page he uses as a book, where he publishes his most elaborated, most expensive pieces and while recognizing his touch, the delicacy in his traits, the peculiar curls of certain lines, the overall feel to them, there’s always this sort of paradoxical disbelief. How could this kid make these and at the same time, who else but him to have made these?
Cute nose scrunches up. 
“I’ll send you my drawings when I’m done with them.”
“Cool.”
“Cool.” He is mimicking you. Same pose with the head nod and the leg cross. Same tone and same expression apart from the discreet light dancing in his eye. “So what’s up? You needed to talk to me about something yesterday, didn’t you?”
It takes a second for you to remember as the drastic change in your mood makes it seem the distressed text you sent him yesterday, right when you left work, was written a whole week ago. You don’t remember very well having felt so stressed and pissed off, pushed to your very limits by useless co-workers, that you felt the urgent need to rant about it all, vent your anger and frustration out to him. He was busy and didn’t answer right away. You got home, find the comfort of your sweater sitting on the warm heater and the glorious stand of your dildo and it all went away, bad mood, headache, grudges. 
Of course, it awakes a wave of shame within you. If you have been able to use it without feeling guilt nor embarrassment on your own, it’s something else to think about it in front of Jungkook. You’ve made sure not to think about this dildo in front of him ever. But here, it’s him recalling it to you without even knowing. 
Whatever, you can pretend that everything’s normal. With a barely natural cough, and the even more suspicious dismissive wave of the hand, you try to kill the conversation, “It was just my coworker getting on my nerves again, it’s whatever.”
Jungkook is watching you soundly. It’s nothing unusual for him. He’s the kind of persons that lean in when they listen to you, you never know how conscious they are of it but it’s like they really mean to make you feel important and heard. Therefore it shouldn’t worry you, he’s just doing his usual thing. 
It still makes you grow increasingly more nervous. 
It is factual that it is never “whatever”. The topic of your stupid dumb bitch of a coworker messing with you has always been a pressing subject you, every now and then, more often than you’d like, needed to ramble about to anyone willing to listen because she tended to make your life a pure living hell. The job sucks in itself but she made it a hundred times worse. And here you are, dismissing it. How suspicious. 
“When you texted me yesterday, I thought it was for something bad.” He starts, frowning and staring deep inside the empty cookie package sitting on the table. “Then I saw you earlier and I thought it was for something really good, because of your face.”
“What’s up with my face?” You try to play it cool. Play it nonchalant and oblivious. If you can’t see the aura of contentment he can visibly observe around you, surely you’ve seen the glow up your skin has encountered since you’ve started using this sex toy. Unexpected benefit of using it that wasn’t even listed on the box, the stress it’s relieved and the pleasure it’s given have just cleared your skin out. Unbelievable but true. And apparently, he noticed. 
“I don’t know. You look really... contented.”
“Contented?”
“Yeah...”
You shrug, looking down, at the crumbs on your side of the table, praying silently that the embarrassment you feel creeping up your face doesn’t show. “I’ve been used to you looking tired and all but you look-“ Like every single once of misery has been fucked out of your system. “Lately, you look... good.” The chosen adjective makes you tilt your head. For so many reasons, you didn’t expect to hear this one and for similar reasons, you don’t understand what he means. Without having you saying aloud anything, he gets your dubious grimace and chuckles, “Rejuvenated, actually.” Even worse.
To simplify in a few words, you used to look like an old decrepit hag and now that you’ve been thoroughly fucked -by yourself technically but still- you look rejuvenated. A word literally no one ever uses in real life.
You detest that he’s probably right. And now, embarrassment is not creeping but actually moving in, with all its stuff and luggage. Hopefully though, again, it doesn’t show on your stupid youthful face. “Are my compliments making you blush?”
Great. 
“You can’t make me blush, moron. And if you think those were compliments then-“ You give him big wide eyes of “well fuck” and of course he laughs at that. 
“Indeed, I can’t make you blush.” He has his serious, investigating type of expression again. You almost expect him to fetch a little notebook out of his pocket and start scribbling observations while asking you more questions. 
“What’s making you blush then?”
“I’m not blushing, it’s just hot.” His eyebrows jump in a rude disagreeing curve. You don’t get why. It can happen, to be hot outside, at the near end of Korea’s winter, while simultaneously having red and painful looking fingers on the verge of congelation desperately seeking warmth in your pockets. 
And maybe because it’s not the first time, he’s getting better at catching the signs, at drawing the lines in between the clues. Your caricatural post-orgasm happy face, your systematic defensiveness whenever the conversation is leading somehow to your sexuality, the blatant tell of shame on your cheeks when there’s nothing else ever that embarrass you in front of him. There’s only the common cause missing and quickly, ignoring completely your attempts at diverting the conversation on something else, a giant light bulb turns on on top of his head. It brings the light of understanding through his eyeballs who suddenly look extra bright. 
“You used it.” For a second, you consider packing up your things and just leave this fucking terrace along with the conversation. But you’re cold as fuck, the way home seems like too much torture to be going through alone.
Why are you like this?
Maybe there’s a vain hope that it will lead to some resolution. Some pleasant resolution. Maybe he won’t talk about it ever again if you just accept to have this conversation without showing the stubborn reluctance you’ve used each time. 
“Yes, I did. So what?” His grin is blinding. It’s one of the very very wide, very very bright ones. So wide it shows all his teeth and it doesn’t even look like the cute bunny smile anymore. It’s the predatory grin. It’s intimidating to solely focus on therefore you chose to pick the corner of his eyes and the top of his nose, all wrinkled up that have anything but intimidation to them. 
“You have no idea how happy that makes me.” You grimace. Indeed. You have no idea because you don’t even fucking understand. 
“You’re a weirdo.”
“I’m just happy you used my dildo.” You scoff and almost choke at both his phrasing and the way he so naturally says the word while you’re outside. There’s no one as dumb as you to sit outside with this weather but still, someone passing by could hear. 
Maybe there’s no deep further explanation to look for. Maybe it’s literally as simple as him getting you a present and him being happy that you found usefulness to it. Like most people. People are saddened sometimes pissed when they flop with presents. Maybe it’s that simple. 
“Don’t say it like that.” He cackles like a witch and you know, that once again he’s just messing with you, knowing exactly what to do or say to tickle your patience. 
“So I can gather it was good?” The worse of the nervous wave has passed. He asks quite nonchalantly. Perhaps it’s your ego wanting that but you hate the idea that you’d find yourself in a situation where he’s clearly more adult than you -even if on so many levels he is. If he can talk about it then you can. Try. You can try. 
“Hm. Was nice.” You kind of sound the way you do when as a teen your mom would ask you about your day and you just didn’t want to answer because of laziness, lack of interest, lack of willingness to share, but that will do. He nods, smiles with his lips tight, rather fondly. 
“How many times did you use it?”
Taking a deep breath, you mumble, shrugging faux casualness, “A few times.” More like a dozen times but he doesn’t need the details, does he? He nods again, still smiling, taking in your answer. 
“Cool.” And he’s satisfied. With the answer and the turns of events as it seems.
There you go, you did it.
You resolved the thing.
Now he can leave you alone with your fantasies and your -not his but your- dildo and there wouldn’t be any further occasion to bring it up. You might be a coward but it’s perfectly fine by you.
Sounds absolutely peachy.
If he chooses to play his part right.
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A/N: oh myyy, we’re getting somewhere arn’t we? i really hope you enjoyed this part, let me know your thoughts, scream your frustration, i’m all ears (or eyes). next update will be a double one because the first part is quite short. hoping you’re excited. i wish you a beautiful sunday and a lovely week. take care, lots of lots love.
Tag list: @infernal-alpaca​ @kaepjjangiya​ @channiespup​ @jinsonaz​ @kpopfandomftw​ @ggukkieland​ (sorry love)
IF YOU WANT TO BE TAGGED FOR THE NEXT CHAPTER, PLEASE ASK IN THE COMMENT, THANK YOU :))
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clarks-letterman · 3 years
Text
Bucky Barnes x Male!Reader
A/N: Okay so this is gonna be a series, and so it’s kinda slow with yours and Bucky’s relationship, sorry not sorry:)
TW: abusive and creepy boss, cursing, slight gore(?)
The snow rapidly fell to the ground as you muttered some 'uh huhs' and 'mhmms' while on the phone. You lightly tugged at your incredibly short uniform, nervous at what news would come next to make this morning even worse.
"(Y/n) (L/n) get back to work! Your ass better be in here in the next minute or you're fired!" Your boss yelled, keeping track of how long you were on break. He really wanted to get his money's worth for what he was paying for you to serve people. Usually, you were good at keeping track of the time but it was your landlord on the phone. He had regretfully told you that you were being evicted by the end of this month.
"Coming!" You yelled back, praying he wouldn't be mad if you could just explain yourself. Meeting back up with him inside that's exactly what you tried to do. "Sor-sorry, it was just my landlor-" he cut you off, "I don't give a shit, that's a personal call that went over your given break time. Now get back to work."
"On it", you said politely, not wanting to deal with anything else he had to say.
God, there was so much you wanted to say to him.
Mostly the fact that he was a major creep, going so far as to make you wear a women's uniform. It was both embarrassing and uncomfortable, as it was tighter than a male's uniform. Besides that, he never gave you an ounce of respect, and made you do every disgusting clean up job in the diner.
~~~
Later that day wasn't any easier, so you couldn't even look forward to a calm evening shift. The only thing that ever made it better was your two favorite customers, Steve Rodgers and Sam Wilson. They were by far the nicest customers to ever visit the diner.
You quickly seated them and tried holding a short conversation after they gave their orders, but your boss immediately shut it down. The sloppy, older male had come over, "What's going on here, (Y/n)? Don't distract the customers with your bullshit." You could smell the beer he had drank, not even waiting until after closing to drink it.
Steve interjected to try and ease your boss, "Actually, we had started the conversation with (Y/n)."
"Whatever", he said gruffly, "just go get their food, bitch." You walked away quite fast, trying not to set him off in front of customers.
~~~
"I hate him, I hate him so fucking much." You vented to yourself in the kitchen, trying to make whatever Steve and Sam had ordered. Since the boss went on a drunk firing-spree a few days ago, almost no one was left working in the kitchen. Which left you to do double the work for the same pay.
"I hate the fact I'm doing more work, I hate that he's a fucking weirdo", you kept talking to yourself, just trying to get whatever emotions out before you left the kitchen to talk to him. As you were talking, you noticed the cabinets starting to sway open and some of the dishes in the sink were shaking violently.
"I hate that I'm being evicted by someone who is just as bad as my boss, I hate-", you stopped yourself when one of the plates had fallen off the counter. Panic set in as you desperately tried picking it up with only your hands, only to cut them on the broken pieces of the glass plate. That's when you heard your boss approaching. "Fuck", you muttered under your breath.
The footsteps came closer, and you looked up to the kitchen door. He came in, swinging both doors open and looking like he was going to kill you. "You bitch", he said, using his strength to pick you up and slam you against the wall, hard.
"After everything I do for you!? You're so fucking ungrateful", he says as he pressed you against the wall even harder. Your boss is preventing you from breathing, so it feels as if you were sinking.
All you could do what let out a small chuckle, "The fuck did you ever do for me?"
The lack of oxygen was kicking in, you were fading in and out of consciousness, your vision was going blurry. A terrible pounding in your head was taking over, although it didn't last long. You didn't know why but your boss must have slowly let go of you, as the pressure of him against you was gone. Regaining your vision was quick to follow after the pressure was gone, but maybe you shouldn't have seen the sight before you.
~~~
Outside of the kitchen, in the dining area, Steve and Sam patiently waited for their food. They knew how your boss was hurtful to his employees, and honestly felt bad for you. And they tried to help by going to the diner to support you. So, they were patient for their food, and never complained if there was a problem.
Concern washed over both of them though, as they heard the glass breaking and yelling going on in the kitchen. Which they expected, but it's what happened next that surprised them.
Everything in the dining area was floating, from things as small as forks to things as big as tables. Steve and Sam weren't sure what it was, so the escorted any remaining customers out. Then, they went into the kitchen to help you, and begrudgingly, your boss.
What they saw was quite horrifying, since it all came from you. It was your boss, in the air, as he seemingly choked on nothing. You were slumped against the wall, your eyes dazed as you let out sounds as if there was a struggle. Steve tried to help your boss, while Sam ran over to you.
"(Y/n), (Y/n)!", Sam shook you, trying to get you out of your trance.
"Hu-huh?" You said softly, glancing at Sam and then over at you boss. He'd made a loud thud, which you were confused by.
"He's out", Steve said, walking over to join you and Sam. "How did you do that?", he asked.
The memories started coming back to you, "I don't know, I was just really upset."
Sam looked up at Steve, who towered over you, "Do you think he's like Maximoff?"
"Maybe," Steve replied, "(Y/n) do you want to come with us to the Avengers Compound? I think there's some people you need to meet."
~~~
Walking into the Avengers Compound, you were shaking more than an intense earthquake.
Do I have powers?, you thought, What if it's nothing? I'd feel so bad for wasting their time.
The thoughts plagued your head, you always doubted your what you were capable of. Honestly, you doubted yourself now more than ever.
It's so dumb that I even have any kind of power, like why of all people did I-, Steve cut off your thoughts.
"And here is the conference room", he said.
Fuck. Holy shit I am not ready for this, you felt as if every part of you had turned to stone.
Sam was following behind both of you, but cut ahead to let himself in the room. Steve then kept the door open, letting you walk in before him and following behind you as you entered the room.
Steve quickly guided you to the front, letting you be seen by the Avengers that were in the room. Only a few of them were identifiable to you; Tony Stark, Nick Fury, and Spider-Man. That wasn't including Steve and Sam though, as you already knew them. Spider-Man was wearing his mask, most likely to keep his identity from you.
The only other person in the room besides them, was a guy you didn't recognize. You focused on his features. He had brown hair that was parted down the middle, which had fallen and covered a good bit of his face. Being seated meant you only saw his upper-body, and could see him sporting a metal arm alongside a leather jacket with straps. Similarly to Spider-Man, he too was wearing a mask. It only covered half his face, leaving his pastel blue eyes to express each emotion he felt. If you were being honest, you actually wanted to see the rest of his face.
You moved your focus back to the silence of the room, realizing Steve had finished introducing you to the group.
"So, what can he do?" Tony asked, crossing his arms and leaning back in his chair. Clearly waiting to be impressed by you.
"Well, he's like Maximoff," Steve said, "he can move things with his mind."
Sam joined into the conversation, "Yeah, he made dozens of things float in the air at the restaurant, and it was some seriously heavy stuff."
Tony and Nick seemed intrigued by hearing this, but you decided to correct them. "Tha-that's right, but I'm not sure how I-ieven managed to do that." You stuttered as the man in the back's eyes met yours while you talked.
Tony started talking right after you, "Well, that's what training is for."
~~~
It was the following day, and you were beyond nervous for your first day of training.
There was a short period of relief last night that washed over you, but any remnants of it had already dried up. Apparently, you were going to spend the next few weeks at the Avenger's compound where you would be able to hopefully learn to control your power. You were glad to hear that they were more than welcoming, as you were getting evicted and would have no where else to go.
Outside of the positive changes in your life, you were stuck thinking about last night. You came across the guy from earlier in the conference room, who had gone from being a stranger to a jerk in your mind. While everyone else you spoke to was nice, he wasn't. When you greeted him after the meeting, he only gave you a look that was as if he wanted to hurt you. The only good thing to come from it was that you saw him without his mask, which you could say that you weren't disappointed in what he looked like.
Your train of thought was put on a halt when you saw someone phase through the wall that was adjacent to your bed.
"Oh- uh, you're-" You paused for a second, "Vision, right?"
"Indeed, Mr.Stark requested that I made sure you were awake and dressed by seven-thirty for your training." He spoke, his eyes following you as you got up from your bed and went over to the closet.
"Okay, thank you?" You said the last bit in an odd tone, feeling the awkwardness of the conversation after Vision gave you the information about your training.
Grabbing some clothes, you turned around and was ready to ask him to leave. Except he wasn't there.
Huh, I guess phasing through walls in a quiet thing to do, you thought, chuckling a little to yourself.
~~~
"Okay, tiger. Let's see what you got." Tony stated over the loudspeakers, with Natasha, Bruce, and the guy from last night standing behind him.
They had put you in a testing room, with the other four being separated from you by an incredibly strong glass wall. You weren't gonna lie, it felt weird to be observed like this. It didn't help calm you down, if anything, it had made you more nervous.
The next ten minutes only embarrassed you, as you were told to move various things around the room, but the efforts were to no avail. It made you feel weak to try and replicate what Wanda had demonstrated for you the previous night.
You approached the glass wall and spoke to the four Avengers, "I'm starting to think I don't have any powers."
"Hey, Bucky, why don't you give (y/n) here a little motivation?" Tony asked, gesturing toward the door that connected the separated areas.
Bucky, huh, I wonder why he never told me his name himself, you thought.
As he walked in, you quickly made your way over to him and extended you hand, "Hi Bucky, I'm (y/n), I don't think we-".
He cut you off, "It's James".
"Okay, James. Well I'm glad to hopefully be working alongside you soon." He didn't reply, only keeping a serious face as he walked to the opposite end of the room from where you stood.
Great, the one guy who actually looks like he wants to hurt me is giving me 'motivation'.
Once again, he glared at you before pulling out a throwing knife. He took a second to aim it before throwing it at you before you could protest against it.
With natural reflex you raised you hands to cover your face and turned you head, waiting for the blade to pierce your skin. Although, you never felt any pain, so you slowed opened you eyes and looked around to see where it had gone.
That's when you noticed it had diverted upwards and went into the ceiling, seemingly right before it hit you.
"Oh thank god." You mumbled under your breath.
Tony then sent in Natasha to see if you divert various things at once. James threw another knife at you, while Natasha fired her gun.
Their combined efforts did not work though, as the bullets went in random directions that were anywhere but near you. James' second knife had been sent into the ceiling again.
"Bucky and Natasha, come back in here. I wanna see if (y/n) can handle the Hulk!" Tony exclaimed, while Bruce stripped down to his boxers before walking in the room.
In seconds he had grown into the swollen green beast, and you were tasked with force of using your power on him.
Shit, I'm supposed to move him?
You took a deep breath and exhaled, trying to focus on using your power to lift the Hulk. At first, it was surprisingly easy to lift him, but you started to struggle. There was this pounding in your head and your body felt like it was being constricted by a tremendous amount of force.
Hulk fell to the ground as you did yourself. The sounds of a distressed Tony and Natasha running into the room was the last thing you heard before everything went dark.
~~~
Your eyes slowly opened as the sound of the heart rate monitor got progressively more annoying to you. Over the sound of the monitor, you heard two people talking. Unfortunately, you could barely move from when you passed out.
“Look, I know him okay! I know who (y/n)”, You weren’t sure who it was, but you guessed it to be James.
“What do you mean? He was just a waiter and now he’s gonna be part of the team, who else could he be, Bucky?”, To you, this guy sounded like Steve from his voice.
Bucky took a second to respond, “He’s from HYDRA.”
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tennessoui · 3 years
Note
49!!!!!! Please
finally!!!! baby, finally!!!!
49. Boss/Intern (35yo!Boss!Anakin, 19yo!Intern!Obi-Wan)
(2.4k)
Obi-Wan rubs his hands rapidly down his face. He feels distinctly like he’s about to burst into tears, which would be a very bad thing to do here and now. His supervisor had come in fifteen minutes ago to tell him everyone was going to lunch. She’d invited him along, but he’d said no.
He always says no.
Lunch for the rest of the office means he gets to have a scheduled breakdown at his little cubicle.
He just. He just doesn’t know anything.
He’s only had this internship at Temple Tech for one week and already he’s floundered and fucked up more than anyone else probably has put together in their lifetimes.
He shouldn’t have ever applied, but he had been getting so desperate for summer employment, any sort of employment and, yes, this internship was out of his career field, and yes, he did have to lie at least five times on his resume, but it was an internship and it was paid.
It had felt like a good idea at the time. But then he actually got the job by some stroke of hellish luck, and he’s been learning every day since that it was actually probably a terrible idea. The learning curve is too steep. Obi-Wan is trying, but wow is he bad at it. Tech. Data stuff.
On his open computer, the sound of an email pinging rushes through his ears and he takes his hands off of his face to look. It’s from Anakin Skywalker. The boss.
Obi-Wan thinks he can feel his fingers grow numb. His heart feels like it’s stuttering in his chest, like it’s about to stop once and for all.
Temple Tech is a start-up company, still small but growing quickly. At its head is thirty-five year old Anakin Skywalker, which shouldn’t be any sort of a problem because Obi-Wan’s nineteen now and he can keep it in his pants, even if Anakin is hot as hell, smart as well, and so terribly kind whenever they run into each other.
Which happens a lot. Because it’s a small company, operating out of one renovated warehouse turned office. The floor plan is open enough that Obi-Wan’s able to see Anakin’s space--he gets a proper office, as part of being the boss, but he’s chosen to make the walls glass so it doesn’t feel as if he’s cut off from everyone else--from across the room. And Anakin is big on making everyone who works with him feel like family. A lot of companies say they do that or support that, but Anakin actually does. For one thing, he tells them to call him Anakin, not Mr. Skywalker. For another, he’s open about his personal life, but not so much that it makes anyone feel uncomfortable.
He’s quick with a smile and so understanding, and if he ever gets mad—and from his stories of his younger days, Obi-Wan knows he must have a temper—it’s never been in public.
And Anakin has never commented on how often Obi-Wan blushes around him, or how hard it is for him to focus on his work if Anakin sits on the edge of his desk to talk with him. Or any of the other employees, Obi-Wan has had to remind himself many times. Even though Obi-Wan feels hypersensitive and like a schoolgirl whenever Anakin is in his general vicinity, Anakin is a professional. He’s Obi-Wan’s boss. Nothing could ever happen between them. Not while Obi-Wan works under Anakin.
Even if Anakin is so nice and so kind and has asked to meet him now when everyone else is out of the building. It’s not suspicious and it’s definitely not cause for concern of any kind.
He thinks about shooting back an email, confirming it, but he’s never been good at the whole office environment thing. Instead, he logs off his computer and stands up.
It’s a short walk to Anakin’s office, hardly enough time for his palms to get sweaty.
Anakin’s typing something when Obi-Wan enters the room and he looks up at him with a raised eyebrow.
“Oh,” Obi-Wan says, aghast when he realizes he’s forgotten to knock. “I’m sorry, I--”
“Obi-Wan, come in, please,” Anakin gives him a slight smile and gestures for him to sit on the couch next to his desk. Obi-Wan takes a seat hesitantly. It’s as soft as it’s always looked.
Anakin types for a few more seconds on his computer before pushing away from his desk all together and taking a seat next to Obi-Wan on the couch.
“I’ve noticed you never go out to lunch with your coworkers,” Anakin says, positioning himself so he’s facing Obi-Wan completely. His body language is open, like he’s read one of those business books on how to sit so everyone knows you’re nice but you have an agenda.
It puts Obi-Wan on edge, and he fidgets around on his seat.
“You’re not in trouble, b--Obi-Wan,” his boss murmurs. “I just want to know why. Do you not like them? Have they been mean to you?”
“No!” Obi-Wan denies immediately, looking up at Anakin and biting his lip when he sees that the man’s attention is fixed so squarely on him. “No, of course not. Everyone here has been amazing.” He widens his eyes and raises both eyebrows. “Really, sir.”
Anakin looks distinctly uncomfortable. “I’ve told you to call me Anakin,” he criticizes, and Obi-Wan blushes more.
He’s really messing this up.
“Sorry, sir, I mean. Anakin. Sorry. Anakin,” he coughs. His palms are sweaty. He’s sitting on his attractive boss’s couch when everyone’s gone on lunch, and his palms are sweaty.
He doesn’t even want anything to happen.
Alright, so that’s a lie. He definitely has spent a lot of late nights thinking about something happening between them, just like this, but those are fantasies and Anakin is his boss. More than that, Anakin is a good man. He’d never take advantage of an intern in that way, no matter how frequently Obi-Wan feels as if he’s walking around with a sign around his neck that says, Take Advantage of Me, Mr. Anakin, Sir!
“Why don’t you go to lunch with them, Obi-Wan?” Anakin asks softly, gently.
Obi-Wan’s hands clench down on themselves. It’s really the moment of truth, now. He really can’t keep lying, not when Anakin sounds so concerned. He has no right to be concerned! He shouldn’t care about Obi-Wan at all; hell, he shouldn’t even know him!
“I don’t know what I’m doing,” he mumbles, staring down at the stretch of fabric on his knees.
Anakin hums. Obi-Wan wonders if he learned that from his fancy How to Run a Business books as well: don’t say anything, just let the other person talk until you know everything you need to know to crush them.
Damn if the silence doesn’t work to get Obi-Wan speaking again though.
“I...I’m behind on the work,” he admits. “I don’t have time to go to lunch because I need to figure out how to do my work.”
Anakin makes a sympathetic noise deep in his throat. “If...if your workload is too heavy, Obi-Wan, we can look into cutting it. I don’t want to be known as the company that runs its interns into the ground.”
Obi-Wan’s throat tightens too much and he shrugs. He can’t cry. He really shouldn’t cry. He did this to himself. “It wouldn’t help,” he whispers.
“What?” Anakin asks, leaning forward to hear him better.
“It wouldn’t help,” Obi-Wan says again, louder this time. Anakin blinks at him, and Obi-Wan finally tells him the truth. “I don’t know how to do any of this. I...I lied on my resume. I needed a job, for my student visa. I needed the money to keep it while not in school. And...and internships are supposed to look good on your resume, so I...I thought I could figure it out, I’m smart, sir, I’m so smart. I don’t know why I can’t figure it out.”
He drops his gaze to his hands again and breathes out shakily. He’d been carrying the weight of that secret for far longer than he should have been. It should have been a relief of the utmost degree to give it away. But instead he’s waiting for the punishment. Anakin will have to fire him now. Anakin might even get mad at him for lying.
When his boss doesn’t say anything for several long seconds, Obi-Wan chances a glance up at him through his lashes. Instead of anger on his face, there’s only a confused sort of sympathy.
“I’m...not sure I understand, Obi-Wan,” he says slowly. “You lied on your resume to get this internship, but...why couldn’t you have just applied to an internship in a different field? One you actually want to study? I know you like biology, you’ve told me more about biology in the past few weeks than you’ve told me about yourself.”
“None of them wanted me,” Obi-Wan sniffles and hates himself for it. “I tried, I promise. I promise I didn’t want to lie, but I needed the money, and this internship paid so much better than working at a coffeehouse would.”
Anakin puts his hand gently on his shoulder and Obi-Wan can’t stop himself from turning into the pressure of it. “It’s alright,” Anakin murmurs. “Oh no, please don’t--please don’t cry, b--Obi.”
“It’s Obi-Wan,” Obi-Wan wails.
Anakin hushs him. “Alright, Obi-Wan, alright. Let’s see what we can do.”
“You’re going to fire me,” he says with absolute certainty. He doesn’t even much like his job at Temple Tech, but how is he supposed to find another one on such short notice?
Anakin is quiet. He doesn’t say no.
“Look, I’ll try harder, I promise,” Obi-Wan stutters out, turning to look up at Anakin with wet eyes. What a picture he must make. Nothing professional about him at all. Nothing worth keeping around either. “I promise, please, don’t--I’ll--I’ll stay after hours, I’ll work late, come early. I need this job, sir.”
Anakin’s eyebrows furrow and he looks genuinely regretful, which is little comfort. “Obi-Wan, it’s not about...your work ethic. I promise, your work ethic is stronger and better than most of the people on my team.”
Obi-Wan wipes at his eyes hastily. He knows there’s a but coming soon.
“But I can’t...if you’ve lied on your resume, you can’t put Temple Tech there later. That’s not fair for anyone else who applied and was rejected in favor of you. The spot you have...I need someone there who knows what they’re doing with computers. Who wants to be there. Obi, it makes sense that you don’t know anything about tech. You never look like you really want to be here unless you’re talking to someone else.”
Obi-Wan’s bottom lip trembles and he can feel another wave of tears coming. “I understand, sir,” he mumbles, standing up and preparing to leave the office and Anakin Skywalker behind forever. He’s never been fired before. He doesn’t know what the decorum really is in this situation.
Being tugged back and into his boss’ arms doesn’t feel like how it normally goes, though.
But he can’t resist melting into Anakin’s tight hug, rubbing his cheek on the man’s nice shirt. He wants to give him something to remember him by, even if it’s just tear stains on expensive cotton.
“Lemme help you,” Anakin suddenly says, voice very gruff. Obi-Wan freezes in his arms and tilts his head to try and see Anakin’s face. Help him?
“I don’t understand,” he admits, biting his lip.
“I like you, Obi-Wan,” Anakin confesses. “I do. I’ll be sad to see you leave. I was already going to be sad to see you leave when your internship concluded, but this is much sooner. I…”
He trails off as if trying to make up his mind. It doesn’t take him long to nod to himself.
“Be honest,” he warns him, but there’s a joking lilt to his voice. Obi-Wan, personally, thinks that’s a little too soon. “Do you know how to clean house?”
Obi-Wan pulls out of Anakin’s arms to stare at him.
“Or walk dogs,” Anakin adds.
Slowly, Obi-Wan nods. Cleaning up a house and walking dogs feels like something he can figure out how to do. Feels pretty self-explanatory for the most part. The only thing he’s confused by is why Anakin is asking this of him.
“Would you...that is, just for the rest of the summer, until your classes start again--how would you feel about cleaning my house? And walking my dogs?” Anakin seems to hold his breath.
Obi-Wan feels like he’s stepped into the Twilight Zone or something.
“You’re...firing me,” he says slowly. “But...you’re offering me a job? As your….maid?”
“‘We should call it housekeeper,” Anakin says quickly, a pained look flashing across his face. “Too...many connotations with maid.”
“Why?” he has to ask. “I mean. I lied to you, sir. I...you’re firing me.”
“Because I need someone in that position who knows what they’re doing,” Anakin explains slowly.
“Do you want me in another position, sir?” Obi-Wan asks. He blushes furiously as soon as the words are out of his mouth.
Anakin’s eyes darken and he clears his throat. He doesn’t say no, and his silence, the double entendre of his silence, makes the breath catch in Obi-Wan’s throat.
“You said you needed money to keep your visa,” Anakin says. “I’m trying to offer you an honest means of employment. I need someone to keep up my house and walk my dogs. If you can do it, I’d hire you over anyone else in a second.”
“Why?” Obi-Wan whispers, suddenly so very aware of how close they’re still standing to each other, how nice Anakin smells, how handsome he looks with just the beginning of a silver streak at his temple.
Anakin sweeps his gaze over Obi-Wan’s face and chest, and Obi-Wan has to wonder what he sees there. Whatever he does, he must like because he smirks. “Work ethic,” he murmurs.
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shycoconutt · 3 years
Text
I Found My Light: Chapter 3 (Kakashi x Reader)
Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3
A/n: Sorry for the delay! Wasn't sure where I wanted to go with this but it came to me in the shower (as all good ideas do). Hope you enjoy it! This story is far from over.
Summary: You attend the group training session where, to your dismay, Kakashi is in attendance.
Word Count: 1800
Warnings: fem!reader, SFW (but won't be in future chapters), violence, angst
Fanart!: Please check out this fanart inspired by this fic by the talented @szamasza <3
If this training session goes like any other typical training session, you are in for a long one. Training usually begins around mid-day and lasts several hours until everyone feels like they’re on the brink of death. Then, when face down in the dirt, Asuma tries to convince everyone to head to the bar on the main street that gives discounts to shinobi. After a few minutes of resounding I’m-too-tireds and maybe-next-times, everyone gives in and spends the remainder of the night into the next morning crammed in a booth getting absolutely sloshed.
This night was like any other night, except not because your anxiety was at an all-time high.
Kakashi showed up about an hour into training, aloof as ever. You were deep in your spar with Genma when you saw him out of the corner of your eye. Genma must have noticed your distraction, as he didn’t hesitate to spit his senbon at you with full force. Luckily you were refocused in less than a second and caught it between your fingers.
“Nice try, buddy,” you teased him, “It’s going to take more than that to throw me off.”
Genma raised his eyebrow at you. “I don’t know, (y/n), you seemed a little distracted,” he teased.
And just like that, you were back at each other’s throats.
Kakashi ended up finding a spot sparing Gai. Typical of him, as usually Gai is the only one who can keep up ability-wise. Although, Kakashi hasn’t seen how much you’ve grown and a part of you is hoping you’ll get a chance at him. You still have yet to use your chakra sword-whip, your most brutal weapon, in front of your fellow shinobi. It’s remained in its sheath strapped across your back, waiting to be used against the most brutal opponent.
“Alright, alright,” Genma pants, curled up on the ground holding his left side where you just landed a forceful kick, “Please show me some mercy, (y/n).”
“Only if you admit that I’m a better shinobi than you in every way,” you say smugly, crossing your arms across your chest.
“Yes, you are a better shinobi than me in every way. You're stealthy, quick, strong, intelligent, adaptable, beautiful, and, most of all, kind. Which is why you’ll give me my senbon back.” He pleas, still laying on the ground with his hand out to you.
“Mmm, fine,” you tease, pulling the senbon from your hair where you used it to hold it in a bun. “It does make a great hair accessory though. I think I might have to get one for myself.” You help Gemma back up to his feet and stick the metal needle back into his mouth.
He gives you a smirk, still grasping onto your hand. “You should see my collection. I have at least two hundred of these,” he boasts, taking the senbon out of his mouth to twirl it in his fingers. “I‘ll make sure to pick one out for you.”
“I would be honored.” You smile warmly, squeezing his hand.
At this moment you could sense a set of eyes staring at you from the other side of the training field. Well, one eye, you should say, as Kakashi is staring directly at you while he holds Gai in a headlock. His expression is unreadable as his eyes flicker from you to Genma and then back to you. You could swear that you saw his shoulders drop a bit before he brought his attention back to Gai who is currently struggling to breathe in his grasp.
“Ka-ka-shi-ple-ase-le-t-me-go-” Gai gasps, holding onto Kakashi’s arms currently wrapped around his neck. Kakashi’s eyes widen when his attention is brought back to his opponent and he immediately releases Gai from his grasp. With a thud, Gai drops to the floor and sucks in one big breath.
“Are you trying to kill him?!” Kurenai yells as she runs to tend to Gai who is sitting on the ground rubbing his neck. Everyone else on the field stops what they’re doing when they notice the commotion and circle around Gai wondering what happened.
“I’m sorry-” Kakashi starts, hands back in his pockets still staring at Gai wide-eyed.
“Apologies are unnecessary my rival!” Gai cuts in, still gasping for air. “Flashes of my youth came to me as I was falling out of consciousness. It reminded me how much there is to live for. I thank you for the near-death experience, Kakashi!” Gai quickly recovers and stands up, dusting the dirt from his green jumpsuit. “You win this round, but I wouldn’t get used to it!” Gai challenges, holding out a hand for Kakashi to shake.
“Yeah, sure Gai.” Kakashi agrees sheepishly, accepting Gai’s hand.
“Damn, Kakashi.” Genma starts, a smug smile pulling at his mouth. “The Anbu made you a pretty ruthless fighter, huh? I didn’t realize friend-killer Kakashi applied to us too.”
You could hear everyone in the circle try to hold in their gasps after registering Genma’s statement. Kakashi’s whole body stiffened and you could see the appearance of a grimace form under his mask. He is visibly uncomfortable. Yet, instead of looking at Genma who just addressed him, he is looking at you.
You suck in a breath, feeling terrible for Kakashi. Rumors spread, nicknames are formed, it’s all a part of being a shinobi. But “friend-killer Kakashi” is on a whole other level of petty.
That jerk.
“Are you fucking kidding me, Genma?” You turn to him and yell. “What makes you think you can say shit like that?”
“Oh c’mon!” Genma retorts. “We were all thinking it! This is the first time he’s been back training with us since the Anbu. You’ve heard what people have said about him. I’m surprised one of us isn’t already dead!”
This time no one was able to hold in their reactions as gasps escaped everyone in the circle.
You are fuming.
“Actually, Genma, the only one you should be worried about killing you is me because I am a second away from shoving that stupid senbon down your throat.” You take a step forward, challenging him.
“Hey, hey,” Genma retreats, taking a step back with his hands up in defense. “I was just trying to look out for us, for you especially. I mean out of all of us, you should be the most concerned. You know, with the whole situation that happened with Ri-”
You close the gap between you and Genma in seconds, grabbing the collar of his vest, you yank the senbon from his mouth and hold it against his throat.
“If you finish that sentence it will be the last words you ever speak.” You threaten. “You have no idea what you’re talking about. You have no idea the details of what Kakashi has been through. What Rin went through. What I went through. It isn’t your place to speak about a situation you know nothing of. So do us all a favor and shut up.” You let go of his vest and shove him back a couple steps.
“Wow, damn, okay, sorry.” Genma apologizes, a hint of annoyance in his voice. “I was just joking around. There’s no need to be so serious about it, (y/n).”
“My hand went through Rin’s heart,” Kakashi speaks up from his silence. “There’s nothing to joke about.”
Hearing Kakashi speak this hard truth sends a sharp pain through your heart, and you instinctively grasp onto the part of your shirt lying over your chest.
You turn and look back at Kakashi, who meets your eyes.
Pain.
So much pain.
You turn to step towards him, but he’s already retreating from the circle.
“I think that’s it for me today guys. I’ll catch you around another time.” Kakashi says as he turns away from the group giving you one last glance. Heading towards the forest, he reaches around to his pouch and pulls out his Icha Icha novel, bringing it in front of him to pick up where he left off.
After a few silent beats, Asuma claps his hands together to bring attention to him.
“So,” he starts, “drinks anyone?”
Everyone immediately becomes more relaxed now that the focus has shifted. You, on the other hand, are feeling so tense that you start to hear ringing in your ears. You get that Asuma is just trying to relieve the tension in the group, but you can’t help but be annoyed that he’s trying to move on from what just happened so quickly.
Kurenai meets your gaze and can read your annoyance. She gives you a pleading look that says drop it for now, (y/n).
Everyone in the circle, including Genma, give a resounding “yes” and head in the opposite direction of Kakashi back towards the village. You're left alone standing in the middle of the grounds as they make their way out.
“(Y/n), are you coming?” Kurenai calls out to you.
You contemplate for a second and begin to wave her off.
“I think I’m going to stay here for a minute. You guys go on ahead, I’ll meet up with you later,” you reply. Honestly, you have no intention of getting back together with them, as any place where Genma is hanging out is the last place you want to be.
“Okay,” Asuma shouts back at you, “we will be at that one bar on main.”
“As always.” you joke back, trying to sound light-hearted.
Once they are out of sight you turn to look back at the trees that Kakashi exited through. You have absolutely no idea where he could be headed to or how fast he could be traveling through the trees. It might be a waste of time to head out after him. After all, if Kakashi doesn’t want to be found, you have no chance of finding him.
Feeling slightly defeated, you plop down to the ground and sit criss-cross in the dirt. You sit up straight and put both of your hands palm-up on each knee. Taking a deep breath in, you feel the breeze rustle through your hair. Taking a deep breath out, you hear the sound of the trees flowing in the wind.
If he wants to talk, he will come to me. In the meantime, I will meditate.
The next time you open your eyes, it’s dark out.
Damn, how many hours have passed?
You close your eyes.
More time passes.
The next time you open your eyes, Kakashi is sitting a few feet across from you mirroring your position.
His eyes are open.
As if your thoughts are mirroring each other as well, you both speak in unison.
“I’m sorry.”
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kirislut · 4 years
Note
Hiiii, it is me 😎✌️ I had this request in my mind for a while, and when I found ur page I was like, I feel like you’d write it perfectly!!!! The request: Bakugou or Todoroki having a very tough day, then when their S/O tries to bring them like soup or smth, they throw it on the floor, and the glass cuts the S/Os hands and they try to hide it while picking up everything, and when the boy sees their hand w a bandage later on in the day, they feel SO GUILTY!! Also, w fluff at the end pls! Thank u!
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a/n: heyyy 😎✌️, first, thanks for this request! second, i don’t know if i can write it perfectly but i hope you like it absksj. definitely don’t feel any pressure 😳 (i got too excited and wrote a lot....whoops)
warnings: bakugou(swearing), mention of getting cut, mention of blood
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Katsuki Bakugou
bakugou is an angry guy, everyone knows that. but today he was especially pissed off. he had gotten into a heated argument with kirishima after training. usually he didn’t care but this time he knew he was wrong but was too damn stubborn and prideful ever admit it.
so instead of working it out with his best friend he was just extra pissed off today. which was unfortunate for you.
when he came back to the shared dorms, you were busy cooking some spicy ramen for the both of you. luckily you had finished training earlier that day, so you and time to surprise your boyfriend!
stomping feet could be heard as you dished yourself and bakugou up, and hearing the stomping meant you knew he was close by. lucky for you he was actually sitting at a nearby table, grumbling to himself about something. you didn’t know what however.
excited to surprise your lover, you practically skip over to the angry blonde. “katsuki! i made some spicy for you~” when you set the bowl in front of him he just grunted and swiped it off the table. “leave me the fuck alone.”
he didn’t even spare you a glance as you just gawked at him, what had you done wrong? gulping nervously you’re just turned to start cleaning up. you used napkins to pick up and wipe up the spilled ramen then started to pick up the broken ceramic.
you didn’t notice that a particular piece was sharp, grabbing it caused you to feel a stinging situation in your palm. so when you pulled away it dragged, creating a now bleeding gash in your palm.
a whimper escaped from you, quickly applying pressure to the wound to delay the bleeding. you moved to the kitchen and used paper towels to clean up your bloody palm, all while bakugou sat there blissfully unaware.
as you cleaned yourself up, the still extra angry male got up from the table and stomped off to his room. he scolded you to leave him alone, because he was actuallt considering apologizing. that thought was pissing him off, and not to mention thinking about how to be kind for once was a slight challenge. only because he was stubborn in this matter.
by the time bakugou was in his dorm room, you had finished up cleaning and were now wrapping up your hand with some gauze because a bandaid wouldn’t suffice. even if bakugou didn’t eat the ramen, didn’t mean you would let it go to waste.
but as your began to ate, you were replaying the situation to try and figure out what went wrong. sure bakugou has a bad temper but this was a different kind of anger which you haven’t seen before. you were absolutely certain you didn’t do anything wrong, so why was bakugou upset?
quickly finishing up your meal and putting away your dishes, you went to bakugou’s room because you were worried about him. it was honestly kinda crazy on how you weren’t even angry or upset with the male, just worried for him because you loved him that much.
everyone has their moments and slip ups were they release their anger on to someone else unintentionally, and you knew that very well. because of a certain boy.
standing in front of your boyfriends door, you knocked. when he didn’t respond after a few seconds you just opened the door and proceeded.
“oi! who said you— oh.” his angry expression faltered when he saw you standing there. lucky for you he was able to calm down after thinking it through and developing a plan. a perfect plan to be precise. nothing less from the ambitious guy himself.
“about earlier, are you okay? you haven’t eaten yet and i know you’re angry.” you shut the door behind you and join bakugou on his bed. bakugou lets out a sigh, leaning back against his headboard and staring at the ceiling.
“you a stalker or something? how can you always read me so well.” bakugou let out another sigh, this time more of a huff as he patted the space beside him. signaling you to sit by him.
as you scooted over to place yourself by him you responded, “i’m your lover katsuki, i think it would be bad if i didn’t know you well wouldn’t it?” the blonde glanced at you then did a little nod. he knew you knew him well, and he kinda loved how sometimes you could practically read his mind.
“i got into a fight with shittyhair, i don’t want to say more because i know i’ll get mad again.” as the spiky blonde explained, he noticed the gauze around your hand. he immediately grabbed your wrist, being gentle, and brought you hand up. “what happened.”
hearing bakugou’s stern tone made you gulp, “i cut myself that’s all! just need to be more careful.” even though you were playing cool bakugou also knew you too well as well. he thought back to when he spotted you in the kitchen, you didn’t have this before. even if you thought bakugou didn’t spare you a glance, he would always look at you once. whether you notice it or not.
his jaw clenched when he realized that he was the cause of this, great today he fucked up twice with two of the people he valued deeply. his silence was definitely worrying you, was he going to yell? you weren’t sure what to expect for once.
his next move you did give you a bit of a surprise. your boyfriend leaned forward and pressed such a soft kiss against your forward. you never knew his kisses could feel so gentle yet loving. “i’m sorry.”
even if his apology was simple, it was all he needed to say. the rest was communicated with his actions. you smiled brightly at bakugou, reciprocating his actions, you pressed a loving kiss against his lips.
the rest of the night was filled with lots of kisses and a plethora of cuddles.
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Shouto Todoroki
there is no beating around the bush here, todoroki was having an absolutely terrible day. he was supposed to visit his mother but his father visited him instead. he lectured his son about how he needs to focus on becoming the number one hero, not messing around with a lover. this led to an agruement which also stopped him from seeing his mother because visiting hours had ended by the time he got there.
so when he came back to the dorm, after an entire day basically going garage. he was not happy, in fact he was quite pissed. he didn’t even try to hide his scowl as he passed by you.
“sho? hey sho what’s wrong?” your boyfriend stopped to look back at you. “(y/n) i’m fine. just a little tired.” todoroki went to turn, but you grabbed his hand.
“are you sure? you should eat dinner before going to bed at least. i even have some left over cold soba!” before he could reject you you dragged him off into the kitchen and served him the left over soba you made for yourself not to long ago.
“(y/n) i’m not hungry.” he replied simply. but you weren’t going to let him get off that easily. “sho please eat.” you insisted.
this turned into a banter of back and forth between you two. you kept insisting he ate, whike todoroki kept refusing. he was losing his patience with each time.
as a last cause resort and grabbed his hand and placed the bowl in it, “shouto you need to eat!” your tone was raised and more stern this time. you weren’t angry but just concerned and worried.
but this pushed todoroki over the edge. his hands trembled for a moment before he chucked the bowl at the ground, “(y/n), you don’t need to act like a parent. i can do whatever i want.”
the fact that todoroki didn’t even raise his voice at you, yet it held so much anger, made you tremble in fear. you stood there frozen in shock as your boyfriend proceeded to walk away.
your fists clenched at your sides, now you were getting upset like todoroki was. how could he just throw the food on the ground? besides he was never one to act like this. sure he got angry, as everyone does, but it was another level.
you crouched down and started to pick up the broken pieces of the bowl. trying your best to be careful. but as you reached for a piece of ceramic, another piece of the broken bowl dragged along your finger. immediately you pulled your hand back, cringing at the stinging sensation. there was another piece of bowl beside the one you were reaching, which had a sharp edge sticking up towards you.
you swore under your breath as bleed started to leak from the wound, getting up to take care of it before you finished cleaning up.
on the other hand, todoroki was cooling off in his room. and now starting to feel guilty for what he had said and done. he knew he shouldn’t have been so harsh with you. but you just happened to push him over the edge.
he wasn’t angry with you, no, mostly at himself. he knew he should’ve informed his father himself that he started dating you, but he never got around to it. which led him to finding out on his own and the previous agruement to occur.
but even if his father disagreed, there was no way he was going to lose you. he would prove that you were no distraction, and in fact motivation. before he could prove that, he need to apologize to you first.
leaving his room, he went back down to see if you were still in the kitchen area. but you weren’t, so he went back up to the dorm rooms.
when he got to your room, he didn’t bother knock and just opened the door. “(y/n)?” hearing todoroki’s voice made you look up from your phone. you were just scrolling on social media to take your mind off you little fight with your boyfriend
“shouto, do you need something?” you watched as he came into your room, shutting the door behind him, and going straight to you. he sat himself down across from you, looking at his lap as he thought of how to say what he wanted.
“i’m sorry for throwing your soba. i’m sure it was amazing, but i was just angry. before i was able to visit my mother, my father stopped me give me a scolding about how he disagrees with our relationship.” todoroki looked up at you as he finished, surprised to see how sad you looked.
“but (y/n) don’t worry, i’m not letting him stop our relationship. i can never give you up, please remember that i always love you.” he reached out and gently held your face in his hands, not wanting you to think that he would ever let someone like his father get in the way of you both.
your frown was soon replaced with a smile, honestly you were slightly embarrassed to let yourself think that todoroki would give up on your relationship just because of his own dad.
nuzzling you’re face into his touch, you reached up and covered his hands with your own. but as you did so, todoroki was quick to notice that your finger was covered up by a large bandage.
“was that from me?” todoroki asked as he frowned, letting go of your face and carefully taking your hand so that he could look at your finger.
“no sho! it was my fault, i was careless.” you watched as todoroki lightly shook his head. “no it’s my fault my love, i’m sorry again.” he brought your hand up to his face and placed a warm kiss against your bandaged finger.
watching him made your heart flutter, how did you end up with such a caring boy? todoroki didn’t stop kissing just your finger. he kissed the back of your palm then moved forward to kiss your forehead, then your cheek, then finally your lips.
you smiled happily against his lips. you just so happy to know that nothing could get between you and your beloved. not even his father. and not even a bowl of soba.
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glowingbadger · 3 years
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SFW and nsfw request for Hilda, Marianne, and Dorothea pls!
Three lovely ladies coming right up ~ (I'm keeping things a tiny bit more brief than some other posts for each character since we have three this time around so this doesn't get too crazy long lol- I'm trying to pace myself a little better these days)
SFW (nsfw below the cut)
Hilda:
- Hilda is so fun as a partner, since she always knows how to have a good time without stressing the little things (or the medium things... or the big things...). She fully encourages you to join her in her lifelong effort to live as easily and comfortably as possible, and she hates to see you anxious or stressed. When you're in a bad mood, few people are as relaxing to be around, as she probably has a cute little craft she could use your help on while reminding you that "we're together, right? So between the two of us, we can get as much done with half the effort- so don't worry about the boring stuff!"
- She's the type to have really cute, thoughtful ideas for dates and gifts, but then to play it off completely when you thank or compliment her. She'll downplay gifts with a glib, "Oh, well, I was just in the mood to throw something together- it is nice though, isn't it?" doing her best to hide the please flush across her cheeks. She's confident, of course, but she doesn't immediately want to let on how much effort actually goes into her shows of affection. Overall, she's a little concerned by how her feelings for you make her want to put in effort, so if anyone comments on it, she'll do her best to disregard the conversation and act like her 'normal' self.
Marianne:
- As you might imagine, she needs a lot of assurance that you're sure you want to be with her- it simply seems too good to be true, when she harbors so many deeply seeded doubts about herself. With a good amount of encouragement though, she's a very loyal and affectionate partner. She's great at remembering birthdays, anniversaries and the like, always putting her whole heart into finding just the right token to show you the strength of her feelings. She'll also do her best to say it aloud, but she tends to murmur and stutter her way through her attempts- at least until a good while into the relationship.
- in a sort of cat-like way, her main way of showing her affection is to simply be near you (though of course, she asks over and over whether it bothers you to have her around). She loves to spend time quietly together, resting her head on your shoulder or your lap. The cutest thing is that, when you're relaxing together like this, if you brush her bangs aside and kiss her forehead, or simply smile warmly at her and tell her something simple and sweet, like how lovely her eyes are- and she just melts. Her face burns bright crimson, and she'll try to hide behind her hands, but it's obvious she's just overwhelmingly flattered.
Dorothea:
- Being with Dorothea is sometimes like dating a celebrity- you're asked for details about her and your relationship with her all the time, and you're considered more of a catch simply for being with her. She is, of course, aware of all of this, and simply rolls her eyes at the attention. For as glamorous as she seems, and as 'wild' as others assume your relationship must be, Dorothea actually has a rather classic idea of how relationships go. She enjoys all of the sweet little gestures and day-to-day expressions of affection- even just casually holding hands as you walk through town, or taking a bite of a pastry you hold out for her over tea.
- It's going to take a lot to make Dorothea feel secure enough to truly settle down with one person. It's always been her ultimate goal, of course, and her feelings for you are true and strong- but she's so accustomed to being self sufficient and independent. Best practice is to assure her that she's still more than welcome to exercise that independence as much as it suits her, and that you'll always be there when she does need your support. That level of understanding is a huge comfort to her. Perhaps paradoxically, knowing that she's free to do as she likes actually makes her far more willing to compromise here and there, and be giving and generous to her partner.
NSFW 18+ v
Mostly Gender Neutral, some AMAB
Hilda:
- It might not be a surprise that Hilda loves being coddled and spoiled in bed- but her absolute favorite is receiving oral. Her clit is very sensitive, and going down on her will have her moaning blissfully and arching up from the bed. If you're really devoted, it won't take long to learn how to get her to squirt like this. Pressing the flat of your tongue firmly to her clit and pulsing against her, moaning as you hold onto her thighs make her cum hard, her vision going white as she whimpers out your name.
- In general, Hilda likes to be with a soft dom. She likes a lover who takes the lead and directs her, but isn't too demanding or harsh, instead cooing to her about what a good girl she is for you, how wonderful her body feels, how cute she is when she moans your name. Her favorite position is to have you fucking her from behind with her lower body propped up on a pillow- and with time, she even discovers that she loves having you grab a hand full of her hair and tug on it while you thrust into her. It's a gorgeous view as well, since she has a nicely defined but plump ass that bounces beautifully against you as you buck into her.
- Hilda is quite fond of cockwarming and similar kinks, and the occasional slow, lazy love-making session with you spooning her in bed as your hips sway against her. She likes this relaxing, low-pressure way of feeling intimate with you, and given her clit is so sensitive, it's not like she requires a huge amount of stimulation to cum. She'll gladly spend a night in bed casually chatting as you slide into her and just savor the warmth of her wet cunt swallowing you.
Marianne:
- You're likely to be her first sexual partner, and it's going to take a long while for her to even feel comfortable exposing herself to you. With enough reassurance and a lot of pre-sex fooling around (one night you may just touch each other a bit while making out, then she may be comfortable with your fingers the next time, and so on), she eventually gains the confidence to realize that you do truly want her, and she wants you dearly as well. Eventually, the trust itself becomes oddly arousing to her, and while it will take a long time to discover this, she actually adores being blindfolded while you take your time touching and savoring her body. Being forced to focus so intently on physical sensation clears her mind of her anxieties.
- Marianne is surprisingly vocal in bed, though she doesn't want to be. It's honestly adorable, the way her hands cling to the sheets or to your body, her face a bright pink as she bites on her lip to stifle an adoring moan. Even light touches down the small of her back or up the curve of her inner thigh cause her to catch her breath, looking up at you adoringly with those big, shining eyes. Trying to hold back her moans is something she's not likely to 'grow out of' with experience, but she's so precious when her eyes roll back and she's whining and whimpering just to keep from crying out your name, it's hard to be upset about it.
Dorothea:
- Dorothea knows what she's doing, and she knows it- and she knows that she's tempting. While not an outright Dom by default (though she can definitely be encouraged into that role and she takes to it marvelously), she is confident and direct in bed. She'll smirk as she straddles your hips and runs her hands down your body, commenting on how she just can't wait to see you completely cut loose. In particular, she loves when you try to play cool and act as though she's not driving you mad with desire, only to fall apart as she pleasures you, gasping her name and leaning into her touch, or even breaking your sense of restraint and pinning her to the mattress to ravage her.
- She's not terribly loud in bed, much more likely to whisper sweet, sultry flattery into your ear. When she does let out an earnest moan, it's luxurious and lustful, almost song-like in its own right. Dorothea is also not shy about telling you what she likes or about trading notes on different positions or kinks you may want to try. She knows that everyone has unique desires, and she sees sex as both a bonding experience for the two of you, and as something that should be fun and easily enjoyed by you both.
- Dorothea loves giving tit-jobs and she is incredible at them. Even if you're just using a strap, she loves showing off her body to you, watching the expression of awe, admiration and a touch of disbelief as she puts on a lewd show of bouncing her breasts around your length. Her technique is impressive, and she's good enough at reading people that she'll easily figure out what you like best. Do you want to see the tip of your length pushing up from her cleavage, or would you prefer the warmth of her lips around your tip? How tight do you like her to squeeze her tits around you, and what pace gets you panting and bucking against her? She'll have you figured out in no time.
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