#or comfort and all they can tell u are things u already know urself so u feel like a burden sharing things and stressing ppl out | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

yawn-emoji · 1 year

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#confiding in friends is good and helpful and healing until it becomes burdensome when u r in situations where nobody can give u advice #or comfort and all they can tell u are things u already know urself so u feel like a burden sharing things and stressing ppl out #by having them worry abt u w out being able to do anything abt it or offer u actual comfort in any way… :(#dont get me wrong im incredibly grateful for my friends but like if my dad is actively dying from cancer as we speak there is nothing u can #possibly say to help so all i do by sharing is make ppl feel pressured to comfort me even though there is no comfort to be given at all #ik u love me and ik i deserve a break from the difficult things life has been throwing at me for the last yr. ik those things already #and it almost hurts to hear them said again because like. ik those things are true and i wish they brought me comfort but they dont. nothing #brings me comfort. nothing at all #i feel like these feelings resurface every couple months and i start isolating myself from my friends whenever this happens because i feel #so like. burdensome but also unable to accept words of comfort or sympathize w anything that anyone else is going thru. i stop liking #conversing w my friends and i just feel too drained to talk to anyone because all that is on my mind is death #i had to delete a bunch of social media + messaging apps from my phone / mute conversations + turn dnd on constantly because i just. i just.#i literally just cant and i wish i could and i dont feel guilty for needing to take this space because i am familiar w this being one of my #needs and also ik i am going thru something insanely traumatic atm and like nobody can judge me or make me feel guilty for what my needs are #at the moment. i used to feel guilty abt this but tbh i dont even have the energy anymore. this is just how i am #like i dont even have the ability to explain to people what the situation is or how dire it is. my sister and i are sure that this is it #but even if this isnt it it will only be a matter of time. he hasnt responded well to a single treatment and we have exhausted everything #so now its just a waiting game. if it doesnt happen in a few months it will just happen a few months after that. there is no battle to even #fight anymore. this is just it #fuck. oh my god #there was more i wanted to say but i started thinking abt it and i feel like im going to have a panic attack so never mind. ummm #okay… anyways!#woozi eating lettuce dot gif #journal

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honeytonedhottie · 4 months

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trusting and betting on urself⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🫧

keep promises that u make to urself : just like how if u know someone who continuously makes promises to do something, yet they never act upon it, you won't trust that person or believe them if they promise u something else. this is also the same with urself. ur new years resolutions? ur goals that you've had for a while but never ever did? all those promises that you've made to yourself and the ones that you haven't followed up on will lessen trust with urself. do what u say you'll do. "stand on business" and if u know that u won't be able to deliver or do what u say you would, dont say it. dont tell urself promises that u won't be able to keep. once u start keeping ur own promises, you'll start to build trust within urself.

hold yourself accountable : just a quick disclaimer but when i say holding urself accountable i do NOT mean punishing urself!! when u find urself falling into old and fruitless patterns you need to hold urself accountable and make sure that u straighten up. the thing about our relationship with self is that a relationship needs BOUNDARIES. you need to set boundaries with urself. what will u or what will u not do? ur non-negotiables?

and when u find urself crossing boundaries within yourself take the BIGGEST step back. the key to forming a healthy relationship with urself is to balance being strict and gentle with urself. strict in the sense that ur the only one that can get u to where u wanna be, and gentle in the sense that ur best won't look the same every single day and u should also listen to urself and what u want, without having to compromise on ur boundaries. kind of finding that middle line is important, bcuz when we're too lenient with ourselves, we get too comfortable and that leads me into my next point...

where growth begins : u cannot expect to grow if ur too comfortable and honestly, this is why most people stay stagnant. its bcuz being comfortable FEELS GOOD. but growth will almost never happen when ur comfortable, on the contrary growth can only happen outside of ur comfort zone. if u want better things for urself, ur simply gonna have to DO BETTER.

the importance of ur self concept : even if ur not familiar with or u dont practice conscious manifesting/law of assumption, i think that working on ur self concept can still be such a fruitful thing to do. i say this because self concept is the way that u view urself in relation to ur desires/goals. its seeing urself as worthy and powerful, and truly grasping ur potential to do great things. a way to start with ur self concept is with affirmations! start telling urself about urself in a positive connotation. you're unstoppable <3

putting it into practice : start small, challenge urself a little bit every day. do one hard thing a day, doing so will build ur confidence bcuz u won't be so daunted by ur big goals when you've already done so many hard things. when u see something challenging instead of thinking "oh i can't do this" you'll have confidence in urself and what u are capable of. oftentimes when we have goals, we kick ourselves out of rooms before we've even tried to get in them bcuz we think "im not good enough" or "im not worthy" which isnt true at ALL. dont shoot urself in the foot. thats self sabotage. and thats not hot.

motivating urself : if u remind urself of your "why" then you'll have reason to stay consistent and truly try. i recommend asking urself the tougher questions, like "what do i want out of my life?" or "am i truly happy and if not what can i do to get there?" once you've decided what u want out of life make a VISION BOARD and actively pursue your dreams. u can't actively pursue something if u dont know what it is. so i advise u to remind urself whenever u feel that u need it of your "why", your driving cause. having that motivation, and actively pursuing and keeping the promises that u make to urself -> will then build ur confidence in yourself to the point where your betting on urself bcuz u know that no matter what cards you are dealt, you'll prosper.

so just to wrap things up, an overview ; start keeping ur promises -> be strict -> get comfy being uncomfy -> say ur self concept affirmations -> apply -> remind

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numberoneasmogirlfriend · 4 months

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Venting to the brothers

My favourites are so obvious, so sorry :(

CW:mentions of su1c1de, mentions of sh, mentions of SA (let me know if i missed something). This probably won't be all comfort and such, but just my thoughts on how would they react, read at ur own risk, not proofread.

U seemed more distant today, and spent most of the day in the library. When *character* saw u in the corner, knees by ur chest and tears rolling down ur cheeks. "What happened, MC?"

LUCIFER

I feel like he wouldnt be good at talking about such matters, but he definitely is proud that u feel comfortable enough to tell him about whatever traumatic/hard events u went thru.

He'll probably be checking up on u more frequently and try to see anything that's concerning in ur behaviour.

I think that he would say things along "i understand it's hard for u, but please don't dwell on the past". He'll try to distract u from these thoughts. If u show him healed self harm scars he will make u promise on never doing that again. And if he sees u breaking the promise? Get ready for a lecture.

MAMMON

He's a sweetheart. He'll hug u as tight as he can, maybe even cry if u say something about ending it all or something. If u tell him about being touched inappropriately, he'll get mad and probably tell u how he would tear whoever dared to lay a finger on u limb by limb. Also, he's the type of guy to kiss ur scars.

He'll try to spend as much time with u as possible so he can make sure ure feeling okay. If he sees u crying, he will take u to a more secluded area (if ure comfortable with that) and just support u thru it.

LEVIATHAN

I feel like at first he would be kinda avoiding u because he doesn't want to hurt u. But he'll still give/recommend shows and games, but will be very carefully picking them so there's no themes that might upset u.

Will try to distract u with gaming. If hes sure ure okay with him joking about ur trauma, he'll definitely use the "villain origin story". Will patch up ur sh with these cute bandaids, so you'll see something nice instead of doing it again.

SATAN

Will be mad that it happened to u. He just hates seeing people close to him suffering. But he hates being the reason of suffering more so he tries to keep calm.

"do u wanna stay alone?" "What can i do to help u?". If u can't get out the things that happened, he'll try to guess so u can just shake ur head "yes" or "no". Will be very cautious and carefull and just acting like he wishes somebody would comfort him. He'll also be very quiet i think. He would barely speak, but his actions already told more than words ever could.

ASMODEUS

Would listen to u and then proceed to recitate a paragraph about how ur body is still perfect and ur personality is even better and that he'll love u forever so don't u dare speak bad about urself.

"shh cutie, let me wipe off ur makeup". If ure comfortable with it, he'll sit u down in his bathtub and try to soothe u. Warm water with lavender, calming bath salts. So many scents but somehow it doesn't overwhelm u. He will put away his usual flirty and dirty-minded self and treat ur problems very seriously.

BEELZEBUB

Another sweetheart. Like Satan, it hurts seeing u being hurt. Will try to distract u with food, even sharing his favourite burgers with u.

He'll listen to u with tears forming in his eyes, and asking if he can hug u. Will press ur head against his heart, trying to take away these memories.

Would cuddle u whenever he can, if u let him of course.

BELPHEGOR

He does not know how to react. I swear he tries his best, but he just doesn't know. Probably will just be silent and sit next to u, giving u a shoulder to cry on.

"let's take a nap, you'll feel better".

I think he is gonna talk about it, but later when he gets his thoughts in order. Will be very careful and empathetic. He can kinda relate after all.

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ghostgirl101 · 11 months

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hey, i really like ur writing and idk if ur working on something rn but when you can and if you want to, could you possibly write some ben drowned x reader kissing headcanons? (only if u r comfortable w/ that ofc!) ur literally my favorite writer on this app nd i literally read everything u post lol so even if u don’t do this ty anyway and have a nice day/night and take care of urself!!🩷

Kissing BEN Drowned Would Be Like This:

A/N: Sure, I'm comfortable with that; this is kind of a whole affection headcanon thing, which I've only just realised now I'm reading it over 🙃 I'm glad you like my writing, hope you enjoy this one, take care of yourself too 😀 Also, should I start making a taglist for my creepypasta posts? If you're interested, let me know.

🎮• So. If you're expecting BEN to be an absolute gentleman who asks for your permission before giving you any form of affection, or is a bit bashful to initiate it...

🎮• Haha. Sorry.

🎮• I mean, he'd never push your boundaries or deliberately make you feel uncomfortable when you guys are being intimate somehow, but he's not gonna be shy about it. That's because it takes a bit of time for him to warm up to the idea of physically coming out of the screen and materializing himself enough for you to hug him and everything safely, without getting electrocuted or whatever.

🎮• Another factor is that after all he's been through, the idea of letting himself be that vulnerable around people is a bit of a daunting one, even if it's you, someone who he's learned to trust and get close to until it gets to this point.

🎮• So, well done to you, for earning the ultimate sign of trust from this maniac virus boy. Chances are that after you hint at wanting to be able to kiss him or something, he's gonna act all teasing and dismissive about it, but what you don't know is that the thought stays in his mind after you've finished up on the computer and gone to bed. He watches you silently from the camera on your open screen (that he's insisted you keep open for him to check in on you) and lets the idea of it grow into a nice, tempting one.

🎮• So get ready for yet another burst of an adrenaline rush as BEN gives you the scare of your life when he comes crawling out of the screen as you wake up in the morning, scattering your desk trinkets and stuff all over the place in the process. BEN has very pale blonde hair in his humanish form, almost white, and even paler skin, with empty black and red eyes, sometimes glitchy... you probably know already. BEN's eyes bleed lightly even when he's not upset, but seem to gush blood when he is. But even with the whole horrifying appearance, somehow, he manages to make himself look handsome. Don't tell him, though, or he'll tease you about it and probably won't ever forget it.

🎮• When you get over the initial shock of him literally just spawning into your room, he stays completely indifferent, if not a bit amused, because isn't this what you wanted? It's not like he bites. Unless you're into that sort of thing.

🎮• BEN is a bit apprehensive at first, because, let's be real, you're his first kiss. His life was twisted into an electronic form when he was really young, and so human touch is almost a completely foreign experience to him at this point, so he will start slow. He might flinch a couple of times, but dismisses it and tells you to go on, that he wants to get used to it. And he does.

🎮• When he does, that's when you've got his chaotic bursts of affection energy to deal with. He loves catching you off guard; you could be doing anything, working or hanging around or whatever, and then he's suddenly there behind you, and you get the tiniest of electric shocks as BEN grabs you effortlessly and refuses to let go for a solid five minutes while you fidget in his glitching but strong arms and glare at him.

🎮• The first thing you'll end up doing is hugging, because he likes the feel of being close in somebody's arms in a way he didn't think he could be before. You're warm and he's consistently cold, leading to you having to slap at his hands when he slides a hand down your back or something bratty just to make you squeal and shiver. They draw out into cuddle sessions, another thing he likes, and will ultimately go soft over. There have been many times when you've managed to fall asleep in BEN's arms, and that's one of the rare times where he'll let all his guard down and fiddle with your hair or play with your jewelry or just stare at you with a newfound feeling of protectiveness and fondness.

🎮• Now for the actual kissing part 🙃 I need to say that it really isn't a first "kiss." It's the first of many long makeout sessions, because BEN will drag it out as much as he can, and then stop abruptly when you least expect it, just to be a tease and wanting more. I see it happening when you're rambling about something or other, and he's out in the real world instead of in a screen, when you realize that your faces are inches apart, and he has a blank, frustrating unreadable look on his face.

🎮• And, before you can say anything, he'll take the plunge before he can think about it any more, leaning in and brushing his lips against yours, but waiting for you to accept it and move in too. It starts off surprisingly soft and sweet, until BEN starts getting addicted to the new, intimate sensation, and tries deepening it. Then it's less sweet and more intense, and (sorry for the cliche lol) electric. He tastes kind of appley, and his lips are cold and soft. BEN will carry on going, further and further, to the point of you ending up breathless and him pulling away with a stunned look on his face. That look morphs into his usual mischievous smirk after he recovers in a few moments, and he raises a brow in amusement at your wide eyes and swollen lips, probably with a snarky little "Not bad."

🎮• After you've done it once, you're gonna end up doing it a whole lot more. There are hardly ever any proper warnings apart from BEN gradually moving in closer and being more teasing and flirty, or on sadder days where painful memories of the past come creeping back to haunt him, a source of comfort and reminder that he's still here and has another reason to be alive and basically immortal. It's not just to drive people to insanity and infect their systems with disturbing things until they crack, or whatever other motives he has. Now, there's you, someone who he's decided he needs to look out for and be with in any possible way.

🎮• Like I said, kissing BEN Drowned usually ends in suggestive makeout sessions and the like, because that's just BEN all over. But they're one way he's discovered he can show he cares, and so he'll keep doing it if you want him to, without any hesitation. Realistically, the boy is beyond touch starved, and so that all pours into the affections he gives you. To anyone else, he's a twisted, demon-like boy who makes peoples' lives hell by getting into their heads through ways they can't control, but to you and you only, he'll let himself become more and more vulnerable, until you see that really, he still was and is Ben.

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serpentthecrow · 2 years

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Sleepy time with the crows

the crows(separately) x reader🖤

Summary: just some fluffy headcannons with our favourite gangsters

Warnings : big fluff, cursing, plushies

A/n: wrote this instead of a Jesper confession fic that got deleted. I also included the plushies each of them have, so enjoy!

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Kaz:

One might assume there will not be much to say, it's not true however

If Kaz finds u trustworthy enough to even sleep in the same room with you, consider urself lucky af

Kaz doesn't really sleep much, just for a couple hours, it's assumably another trick of his, how he wakes up

When he ACTUALLY needs sleep, he drinks Camomile tea

I picture Kaz's bedside table is actually a stack of books, and there are several more stacks on the other side of the bed, so he reads quite often

He's genuinely scared to fall asleep due to his nightmares sometimes

After getting comfortable with you, he will slowly inch by inch move your beds closed to eachother everyday, until you notice

Whispers 'fuck u ' to the moon when it shines in his window

Just lays flat on his back and sleeps (how?)

Secretly has a crow plushie he got from Jesper under his bed

Jesper

The biggest cuddle bear ever

He will wrap you up with his arms and legs like a rope, and will not let go even under the use of a fucking crowbar

It's his routine to kiss his revolvers good-night before going to bed

Not before checking himself out in the mirror to look good and ready for a night intruder

REFUSES to buy a bit bigger bed, no matter if your savings could buy a bed that even majesty King Nikolai.*million titles*.. could hardly afford

The secret meaning is that Jes doesn't want you escaping from him to the other side of the big mattress

He'd rather fall off the little cot you have

Forgets to take off his rings

HAS a goat plushie

Inej

Inej is pretty straightforward- lay down, sleep if you can

challenge: try not to stab urself in the eye by the knife she has under her pillow while turning in ur sleep

Could use some protective cuddles if she trusts u

Prays before going to sleep

Bed time= heaven time. Main reason?she lets her hair down when going to sleep

Be prepared to do some careful and slow comforting for her at 1am

U will get urself stabbed if Ur not careful

Light sleeper, can be out like a light tho, after a whole day of climbing roofs

Fuzzy socks.

Has a teddy bear

Nina

U won't fall asleep with her. I swear

Is the type of person to talk and talk and talk about random things for hours

And when u think she's already asleep, ur suddenly hear "I would never kiss a dude who eats dogs"

Eats a ton of food before bed

*cough*like me*cough*

Loves bedtime stories and singing lullabies in Ravkan- recieving or giving, doesn't matter to her

Back tracing

Has an assortment of plushies all around her side of the bed and if one is missing, she will start a war

Sleeps on her stomach

Or on u

Sleeps naked by choice

Cuddly little witch

Matthias

Wrapped around u for 'protective' reasons

Tells u stories, myths and traditional legends from Fierda

Also prays to Djel, even tho he wipes his hands after finishing and exclaims he doesn't have to really

Drinks weird amount of water

Sometimes lays in bed with shoes on - sinner

Never saw a book in his life

Normal duvets? What is that? Did I hear fur?

Wake him up. I dare you. Try it.

Extra vulnerable before bed

Don't make him sad at the time pls

LOVES when it rains at night (I think they all love that, except ONE)

Owns a tiny white wolf plushie, it's under his pillow if u wanna know.

Wylan

Certified cutie

The adorable matching pijama sets he wears

Will probably draw.

No need to say he won't read before bed

The little spoon

Warm milk with honey melted in it is his to go drink for bed(try it, knocks u out)

The bed hair(not so different from his normal hair lol)

Has a dinamite plushie he sleeps with all the time

Is the one who doesn't like when it rains, because what If the rain turns into a thunderstorm?

ABSOLUTELY HATES THUNDERSTORMS

They scare the shit outta him

The sleepy mumbles... Help

whispers good night back and forth with u until one of u fall asleep

fluffy and smol bean

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A/n: Ahh turned out better then I first thought. Lemme know what u think! If you'd like to requests something, my requests are open, please read my pinned post before requesting, there you'll find rules but also the fandoms I write for ❤️❤️

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ashstfu · 8 months

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ash i'm having a terrible day :( people underestimate me so much, it makes me doubt my own self everyday. i try so hard but somehow its never enough. ew its getting heavy lol i just wanted to let u know how comforting i find ur tumblr to be !!! ur so cool to me !!! and for some reason, i feel like u give the best hugs. take care of urself <3

hey!!!! its okay to have bad days. this is temporary. things will get better. they do get better, trust me. many people will underestimate you but some will get you. some people will see you shining brightly under a veil of humility and those are the ones to focus on. no matter who you are, you can never please everybody. people who underestimate you suffer from a kind of blindness.. (ugh stupid people, boo i hate them 👎). but that is not your problem, you will not be able open their eyes by being genuine no matter how hard you try. just focus on yourself and be authentic and when you find someone with the ability to see those qualities in you, direct your high beams at them. also angel :( you will never "not be good enough". EVER. dont be so hard on yourself. i know it’s easier said than done, but try not to let your mind convince you this. even when those thoughts insist on invading your brain, you don’t have to give them any power, because they’re not true or tangible at all. just because your brain is telling you something, doesn’t mean it’s the truth or that you have to believe it. you don’t have to let that part of you control you any more than it already is. i want so badly for you to realize that your presence and your existence in general is an amazingly positive thing, and that you have the power to dictate the way things turn out. you don’t have to doubt yourself, you just have to change the way that you’re living a little and also. stop associating w people who make you feel bad. try to be enough for yourself. that’s who you’re going to be with for the rest of your life. yourself. you depend on you <3

also hiii i adore the thought of this blog being a source of comfort to you and im just. infintely grateful that you give it the time of day! sending so much peace and warmth your way, please take care & be kind to yourself (mentally hugging u right now and taking you out for an ice cream date & we end up watching sunset together at the beach ! 💗)

#ask

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formulawonu · 1 year

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hi can you do a svt comforts y/n during their period and what they are mostly likely to do. <3

seventeen & period cramps

seungcheol: whatever ur craving for or want hes buying it the moment u say it out loud dhjxkdjh i think he's a lil flustered when u bring it up but then he just goes into leader/protective-mode and just dotes on u and wants to make sure ur ok. if ur cranky he is staying away 🙏

jeonghan: because he would try to make u feel better by bickering with u sjhsjadkfj like if u say smth out of pocket he'd be like "rly 🤨" then u eventually just forget abt ur period cramps or crankiness bec ur busy being arguing w him. he tells u about his tactic after and ur like 🙄 but hes like "it worked tho????"

joshua: he's the sweetest!!!! like he'd be walking on eggshells just a teensy bit but he's nonetheless very receptive to what u need. if u want alone time he can do that if u wanna cuddle he can do that skjdhs he's also the type to heat up the heating pad for u without u needing to say anything

junhui: will pig out with u no questions asked. ur craving pizza? he'll by one for each of u. ur craving ice cream? a tub for each of u. just wants to make sure u are happy and does whatever he can so u feel u arent alone

hoshi: he would treat u like an actual baby and be so doting to the point where ur like "soonyoung i can FEED myself" "soonyoung i can walk im on my period im not injured" but thats just how much he cares about u 😭 asks u how u are every hour

wonwoo: he would stay in bed with you the whole day. like that's his way of making sure you're okay and that you know he's literally there if u need anything. u spend ur days napping cuddling doing ur own thing with him beside u just for extra care :( does not bother u at all and he's so understanding abt everything

woozi: the man is in his studio most of the time already but if he knows ur on ur period he would make an effort to check in with u more often or even leave the studio just that much earlier to see you and be with you :( IM GONNA CRY

minghao: this man just gets it. brings u tea or offers to give u a massage or heat up the heating pad like he does not get affected one bit if u get moody or whatever he just lets the attitude pass and helps u figure out what u want <//3 also he knows periods are different for everyone so he doesnt assume anything he just asks u what u need straightforward

mingyu: this man serves u shit in bed lets be real like if u say u want warm soup he'd make it from scratch or whatever 😭 he'd also be down to just cuddle u in bed if thats what u want or give u massages cus his love language is physical touch (fight me on this) sjhdfsdjh he'd also kinda steer clear of u if ur in a bad mood bc man does not wanna make things worse

seokmin: PLS HED BE SO FUNNY DKHFSDHAS like he's just constantly racking his brain for what to do while ur on ur period when u just need him to continue being the same like hes overthinking everything hes abt to say to u and wondering if ur gonna get annoyed. but honestly it just comes off cute u cant hate the guy

seungkwan: HES PERFECT FOR THIS LIKE along w hao hes the one that rly does not shift who he is or whatever. honestly u look for HIM when ur on ur period and hes there already ready to do whatever it is u need him to do. u ask him for reassurance food rest advice and hes ur man.

vernon: clueless and doesnt know ur on ur period unless u tell him urself or say u have cramps jhdfsdj u know what maybe if u say cramps he still wouldnt get it until he puts two and two together. lots of awkward laughs and he would also just ask u whats up or if ur in the mood to do this or that. hes okay

dino: HE WOULD GET ON UR NERVES TRYING TO HELP U JHSDFGSRJFGHD like i picture it u cant clearly explain what u want and hes trying to connect the dots so when he tries to do something ur like NOT THAT LEE CHAN and hes like omfg sorry im so sorry and hes mostly apologizing. hes trying his best <//3

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xxbl00ds0akeds3raxx · 4 months

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hey, fifi? seraphina? my love, my one and only… we really need to talk.

i was reading through your old posts and i found some REALLY weird stuff there.

like, okay, i know we’ve talked about ur other… flings before. i’ll tolerate them for you, you still know that. but.. what’s this about working at the brothel??? PLEASE tell me someone was joking writing that… in all of those asks… this has to be some weird joke, right???

at least with ur modeling and streaming, i can keep you safe. no one can hurt u there. but the brothel? sure, the whole town is crawling with rapists, but why would u intentionally go where they’re all gathered??? u even SAID that u KNOW it’s unsafe. why do u keep working there? it has to be a joke. if it’s not, u need to quit.

please. I can get us a flat or something since u can’t stay at my house. or get my parents to like u more. It’ll just take a bit more time. u don’t have to keep working to earn money. or at least not there. i could keep us safe, and happy… i just don’t know why u don’t trust me to do that!!

…i need to go look through the rest of ur posts now too. don’t block me, i have other accounts too, you already know that. u can’t keep hiding these things from me.

is there anything else u want to admit now too?? u know i'll find out eventually.

i’m TRYING to be good for u here. but it’s getting really fucking hard. i'm just trying to protect u.

…please reply.

- kylar

hhh hello kylar! my love, my pretty boy!!! umm!! tha thing abt my old posts is that they r old! ^.^ no need to look through the rest of them. not that i'm hiding anything from u— i just think we should talk b4 u... mmm, rile urself up more maybe ??

ofc i have no reason 2 lie to u sooo ahaha... ^_^ yes, i used to work at the brothel. i mean...,, i technically still do but mostly just to restock the facilities! i dont dance anymore. except for fridays,,, but all of that is very meticulously planned out and none of it is real! just a show!! briar makes sure it's safe 4 me bc umm the audience rlly likes me and i make her a lot of money so i can't just... quit really–

i don't have 2 fuck anyone there anymore, so its okay, right?? i could go over tha terms n conditions of shows w/ u if it'd make u more comfortable ??? ^^' i swear ik what i'm doing & i am being safe now, i didn't tell u bcos i knew u wld get worried and i never want to make u upset im sorry :((

baby, that sounds wonderful but... how would you even afford a flat— ? i mean, i could pitch in of course, but i still have to pay off bailey :/ and i have 2 be responsible 4 robin as well,,, u know im working hard 2 get on ur parents good sides but it will take time ಥ_ಥ

i do trust u!! i know u have my best interest in mind <3 it's just that um... sometimes wat u want isn't... realistic- like,,, even if i did quit, the problems wouldn't go away. i made my bed n now i gotta lie in it & until i have tha resources to cover it up,,, its smth we have 2 live w/ 〒▽〒 ghhh im sorry that i've dragged u into all of this :( i will make it up 2 u i promise !!!

u are being so good and i'm so proud of u, i love u so much <3 plz be patient w/ me, i'm also trying,,,

#ask #fifi answerz #kylar the loner #dol pc #oc rp #character blog #roleplay blog #original character

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twentyfivemiceinatrenchcoat · 6 months

Note

hey ari!!! hope ur doing super well <33 i dropped by to ask u a few things…….

let me know whenever u find the time to read my gojo fic… i made a few revisions over time and i’d rlly love to hear ur thoughts o valued gojo lover ;; its become very important to me , but no pressure :33

AND. need ur most brainrotting thoughts about sashishu por favor. for. research. yeah… research 🙇‍♂️

riko !!!! i hope ur doing super super well urself, im doing just fine <33 trying to finish this fic im writing so i can (hopefully) post it today pshjdh BUT its going good so far !!

i know i alr said it but !! i am so so excited to read ur gojo fic !! if i dont have time today then i will tmrw 🙏🙏 cant wait to rb it w a huge rant i took a lil peek at it n i can already tell its gonna be so good….

AND RIKO. tysm i appreciate u like no other, ive been waiting for a chance to rant abt my Absolute Beloveds……… this might get long im sorry but sashisu make me. genuinely insane

OK SO. just generally speaking…… to me, the biggest sashisu appeal is just. how grounded they are. to me. i feel like both jjk trios are very realistic but in different ways!!

like. the 2018 trio are just !! good friends and they care for each other and they have fun together. AND most importantly; they can be open w each other !! like all three of them are a lillll closed off and obviously traumatized but they can still be sincere with one another. yuji talks openly w both megumi and nobara, megumi’s whole arc revolves around him getting comfortable with the idea of leaning on others and being saved by others, and nobara’s whole character hinges on her just being unabashedly herself.

AND I LOVE THEM i really do but sashisu r just so….. different and also similar and they feel so real to me even though theyre all insane in the head.

because contrary to the 2018 trio, theyre all sort of. Cunts pshjdhd. LIKE. high school satoru is a brat and he thinks he can make friends by being a bully and hes kind despite that but hes also sooo infuriating, and suguru acts like hes better but hes rly not. theyre both assholes. same w shoko!! shes literally out here casually underage smoking and all three of them get in trouble n then blame it on each other n its just…. theyre just so fun. they bully each other but u can TELL theres love there.

and the greatest difference between the 2018 and 2006trio is that the former can be open with each other, but the latter cant. sashisu are doomed as a trio because theyre all so closed off and traumatized and repressed and they will never be as sincere with each other as yuji/megumi/nobara are.

and to me, thats the main reason why suguru defects !! not that its their fault, but the fact that they didnt notice — or maybe the fact that they DID notice but didnt know how to broach the subject — is the one factor that makes his defection almost unavoidable to me. because his best friends, his most loved people, were never the type to be vulnerable like that. and neither was he !!

theyre just so DOOMED riko….. suguru couldnt open his heart to satoru or shoko, satoru didnt notice suguru’s silence bc he was too busy making himself strong enough to protect them, and we dont know how shoko felt but she obviously didnt do anything even if she did notice smth was off. neither of them saw how much suguru was suffering, and suguru was extremely depressed and isolated and never once gave them the chance to help him.

the three of them just werent the type to have heartfelt conversations in the same way the other trio does, and i think sashisu just… figured they didnt need to. that they had that bond together and that it would always be enough. bc all three of them have these incredible powers that make them isolated and kind of miserable, but they were able to be kids only when they were together. during that one year, they got to feel that slice of normalcy and genuine friendship.

and then they lost it !! and shoko and satoru both regret it !!! and they were never able to hate suguru, and he was never able to hate them, even at the very end !!! and the thing that always breaks me is that its just so, so evident that they all loved each other. but it wasnt enough !! and i think thats such a …. grounded and real depiction of how it can be to love someone who’s ill, or traumatized, while you yourself are ill or traumatized. and you might love each other, and it might still not be enough. but the fact that the love was there still matters.

they were three child soldiers who only found comfort in each other, and they all crumbled under the weight of the world but even at the very end they still loved each other.

and for sashisu, that love never disappeared — both shoko and satoru became more responsible after suguru left, and together theyre able to protect so many of the students and their coworkers. and theyre still traumatized and arguably even MORE repressed but the two of them still stick together, and theres a comfort in knowing theyll always have that. (im ignoring the current manga arc its not canon to me idc)

THIS IS ALREADY SO LOONNGG i just. i ADORE them. theyre so good. but !! if we’re moving past just general analysis of them then !! i love to think abt…. sashisu x reader……. maybe one day ill finish my sss x reader series psjdjdj but !!!

i just think itd be such a fun n comfortable dynamic ?? bc they all complete each other in a way…. satoru is just kinda hyper n cuddly n sweet, n suguru is calm and teasing n warm…. and shoko is so chill but also so caring and . i Need them. all of them r so gorgeous i would fall to my knees and cry if i just saw them relaxing by the couch.

i feel like a reader dynamic w them would just be the four of u living together and spending the rest of ur lives doing the same things u did in high school….. going to karaoke n getting in trouble and eating food . etc etc. maybe getting a couple cats…. and a bunch of plants that would all die if it werent for suguru pshjdjs.

in conclusion they make me feel ill <3

(also riko…. pls read the pink lighter by nosferatui, its a sashisu fix-it time travel fic and its one of my favorites ever !! i still havent finished it but its complete and it genuinely changed my life the writing is so good it hurts)

#in my defense u brought this rant on urself riko………#hhhhhh they mean sm to meeeee #i rly hope akutami can squeeze out just one more tender sashisu moment….. for me specifically……..#if u have any sashisu thoughts i would loovveee to hear them riko !!! or anyone else for that matter !!!!! they r my specialest lil guys #sashisu #ask tag ✩

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cyberjaiee · 2 years

Text

(｀Δ´) ﹒ ❋﹒🪑 ﹒manifestation lesson two !? ﹐✩

⠀

# WAIT,, JAIE HOW DO U MANIFEST . . . !!! 🩹 ★?!% a step by step on how i manifest

⠀

manifesting is so easy, honestly. this is just how i do it to keep it fun and to immerse myself with my desire. again, this is just how i do it- you do not need to take what i say as if it’s scripture. feel free to change steps so that it works better for you, or don’t do any of these steps at all.. idc. don’t overcomplicate it, i know it seems too good to be true but have a little faith in urself.

⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⭒ ༺ ♰ ༻ ⭒ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀THE STEP BY STEP

⌔﹒first things first, the obvious, choose what u want ( duh ). now if ur manifesting your desired face or desired body, it’s ok if u don’t know exactly what you want !!!

⌔﹒second step. now this is where it gets fun !! knowing your power. to do this you just get in the state of having it all, i do like to hype myself up a lil bit. ! i just casually affirm to myself, here’s a few affs :

⠀

wow, i am so amazing.

i’ve manifested so many major things, it should be illegal how powerful i am.

as long as i keep persisting in an assumption, there is no way that the assumption won't occur in my physical reality.

i can change literally whatever the fuck i want.

i manifest instantly.

nothing in this world is above me.

anything is possible, since infinite realities exist.

everything ALWAYS works out in my favor.

it’s not my dream life, my dream body, or my dream anything. it’s my life, my body, and my perfect everything.

i am the key to my success.

everything i need is within me already.

damn i look perfect today.

manifesting is actually so easy.

i am the pedestal.

i am above every method and rule.

i could never fail.

knowing my desire is more than enough for it to manifest.

i’m so powerful, i give myself instant results.

YOU DONT NEED TO COPY THESE JUST SAY WHATS COMFORTABLE.

⌔﹒step 3. occupy the state !! align your thoughts with the assumption that u have whatever it is you are manifesting. right now is when you decide it is yours.

i want you to understand that routines work because you think it does. so, right here, right now, i want you to choose something. anything !! drinking water ?? listening to a certain song ?? visualizing for a few seconds ?? choose smth.

tw // slight mentions of death + intrusive thoughts

i personally have moments where i feel like i HAVE to do something to prevent it from happening. i get these intrusive thoughts, i literally have panic attacks for not keeping my shoes in the right order thinking that not doing that is gonna lead to some bigger, life-threatening event. like mayb we’d have to evacuate but my shoes wont be in the right place so when i do have to evacuate i’ll get the wrong shoes and mayb die.. yea my mind does this to me like 5 times a day.

end of the triggering section ^^

so i use this to my advantage, i tell myself that keeping the pile of journals i have on my desk stacked nicely will prevent me from not shifting to the reality where i have my desire. on top of this, i energy charge my water ( not necessary, just fun ) and say that finishing my whole bottle by the end of the day will guarantee my desire being mine once i wake up. for some reason, i think i need complex methods so i even dance to music while affirming and say that will give me my desire as well.

⌔﹒once i do all of this, i just live in my head. i daydream and talk to myself, putting myself in situations that have to do with my desire. like if i am manifesting clear skin, i’d walk around my room talking to ‘people’ who are asking for my skin care routine, asking why i have such clear skin, etc. after this, i usually go to sleep. then that’s it !!

if u want u can affirm as you fall asleep !! yk, use sats to ur advantage.

⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⭒ ༺ ♰ ༻ ⭒ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀RECAP

⌔﹒choose ur desire.

⌔﹒affirm casually on how powerful u are !!

⌔﹒occupy the state, use little things and say that it’s helping u get ur desire. mayb use actions that are oftently found in methods, example : scripting, affirming in the mirror, listening to a certain song, counting then affirming between each number, etc.

⌔﹒go about ur day as if u have ur desire.

⌔﹒affirm as u fall asleep if u want.

⠀

whatever you think will get u ur desire, will get u ur desire. it’s all about what you believe in. know you have it and just persist in that knowledge. ur math teacher tells you 200 + 345 equals 545, you’ll believe it right ?? because they’re the professional. you’re the professional in your reality, so accept ur desire as fact. you’re the one who would know, YOU’RE THE PRO. what you say, goes. wouldn’t you know it, i’m a poet.

anyways, what did we learn today ?? manifesting really is effortless. this won’t fail you, you could never fail yourself.

#﹒✶ jaie's lessons #how to manifest #how i manifest #manifestation #loassumption #manifestation method #affirm and persist #affirmations #mindset #step by step how to manifest

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intertexts-moving · 7 months

Note

YOUR TAAAAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS YOUR TAGS. ok. off is kind of hit or miss for most people because its so weird and vague and i am extremely biased bc its one of my favorite thinfs ever BUT. i am going 2 say i think u will love it actually. its got soooo many fairytaleisms. its got tragedy. its got extremely morally grey characters. theres no good guys or bad guys. ITS GOT WEIRD LITTLE GHOSTS !!!!!! look at these bitches i used 2 doodle the off spectres in my notebooks like constantly they feel like home 2 me

the art style is so unsettling and creepy. its got sketchy lines and weird freak of nature characters. i am going to be EXTREMELY selfish here in saying that i think u will very much enjoy the art style and also i want 2 see how u would draw some of the characters bc ur style is very monochrome and messy (<< i mean this in a beloved sense i love your linework so much) and i think it fits the vibe so perfectly. on a completely unrelated note are you still taking commissions.

ITS GOT ONE OF THE ALL TIME BEST OSTS EVER BTW. i still have the main battle theme (which is called pepper steak btw. best name for a song ever) as my ringtone on my phone. my video game ost rank goes 1.portal 2 2. off 3. undertale 4. minecraft. the off ost holds higher regard in my brain than undertale. shaking your shoulders it fits the vibe of the game soooo perfectly.

i will not get into the story too much here bc i already talked about some vague spoilery stuff in that post and i dont want to tell u too much more in case u do play the game urself BUT. ohhh my god. i could talk about the story for hours. u can ask aster after we finished the game we sat on call for like 2 hours while i walked her through my personal take on the ending and then she gave me her thoughts on the ending and EVEN THOUGH WE PLAYED THE GAME TOGETHER AT THE SAME TIME (i streamed it for her) WE HAD DIFFERENT OPINIONS ON THE END. ITS SOOOOO FUCKING GOOD its one of those things where like. its so open ended that nobody ever gets into fights about what the "right ending" is because. well. there isnt one UGH i love that shit.

also zacharie is here. he is such a beloved character to me hes been one of my biggest huge comfort characters since like. 2015. i love him. hes like sans undertale for people in 2008. he was the original sans undertale. i think they would be best friends

oh also despite the fact that the setting is very much like. weird abstract, sort of fantasy sort of industrial, the main character is a fucking baseball player. hes so out of place its so funny

^ official art btw. to give u a taste of mortis ghost's art style. its so silly and weird i love it so much

OK THAT WAS MY OFF PROPAGANDA SORRY FOR INVADING UR INBOX I LOVE YOU also ive been in a huge off mood for like 3 days now and have not been able to talk about it so im EXPLODING now

OHHHHGHGHGHGHHH. MACKERELLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL MAC U CAN'T DO THIS TO ME..... ohhhh my god. ok. ok yeah im pinky promising u right now i WILL play it. like. SOON. it looks so good hooly shit. game that i can TELL will rearrange my brain. also it looks SO nice... i like the art style so much. mac u are GETTING me here u KNOW what u are doing. u cant just go ros theres an unsettling morally gray tragic game with an incredible ost and weird art and NOT expect me to go fucking bonkers.

#also i trust my frebds implicitly... i loovelovelove. consuming media my friends enjoy esp. if they think ill like it too.. its so cool.#anyway .OUGH.THERE ARE WEIRD LITTLE CATS TOO????#ok god currently i'm playing through final fantasy 8 (LONG GAME) & watching adventure time & rereading magnus chase & doing #one million other things but i WILL make time for off. i want 2 soo bad...#mac tag! 🦈

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allieebobo · 10 months

Note

Hi Allie!! The update was really gooooodddddd! Anw, ive been stalking and reading through the asks & while I’m enjoying those, i don’t think anyone has asked u about urself yet. Or maybe i miss it but I’m interested to know more about the author who wrote 2 of my fave IFs. Just general questions like;

1. which part of SG were you from?

2. Fav food?

3. Fav place to lepak?

4. Pri/sec school (if you were educated in sg)

5. What made you migrated to USA?

6. Where are u currently based in?

7. Are u still a student or a full-fledged career womann

8. One place in sg that will always carry beautiful memories for you, now that u’ve moved abroad.

9. What sparked your interest in writing these IFs?

Hehehe. If some of the questions are abit personal, you don’t have to share ur answers. Have a good day ahead 🤍

Ooh!! Anon, these are great questions hehe!! Sure, we can do a get-to-know-me session!

I will answer a couple, and get back to the rest at some point, OK? If there's a question that I didn't answer that y'all are really curious about, you can send me an ask with the number and I'll get to it sooner rather than later.

(P.S. no, none of them are too personal, I just think it'd take me a gajillion years to reply if I tried to answer them all!)

Got long, so the answers are below the cut!

1. which part of SG were you from?

Redhill/Bukit Merah! There's a moment in Merry Crisis where MC talks about it, and that's directly from my life! West side, best side! If me and my partner were entitled to a subsidized public housing flat (we aren't, for so many reasons including we're queer and she's not Singaporean), I'd absolutely buy a flat in the exact same neighbourhood.

2. Fav food

Wow... I can't really choose one, but if I could cheat and pick a whole cuisine then Peranakan food, hands down. Petai (stinky bean) with ikan bilis is one of my fave dishes—and it reminds me of my grandma. Otherwise, ban mian is a big comfort food for me, and so are red chili oil dumplings. I also love kaya toast with eggs for breakfast. Herbal bak kut teh and teochew fish are things I love but wouldn't eat every day... All of these might show up (the fish already has I guess!) in the game at some point!

For non-Singaporean food, I could eat udon, all kinds of pasta, and som tum all day every day.

3. Fav place to lepak

<Lepak is Singaporean/Malaysian(? I think) slang for like, 'chill' or 'hang', btw.> As you can already tell I added a lot of my own experiences/things I love into Merry Crisis already, so I'm going to have to go with Labrador Park and Sentosa. As a kid my mom would bring me and my brother to the rocky coast in Labrador after school with a box of Sarpino's pizza and we'd play in the water and eat and get really sandy. Sentosa back in the day was less commercial/touristy, and we'd just park in the carpark for $2, and spend the entire Sunday just chilling on the beach (yes, I'm a huge beach person haha), and my dad (not a big beach person) would be napping under a big tree probably wishing his wife weren't such a big beach person because it's been inherited by his kids and now this is how he'll spend his weekends for the rest of his life.

6. Where are you based in? 7. Are u still a student or a full-fledged career woman

Have a full-time job, sadly. I've been working as an urban planner in Singapore for three years now. (Think that answers both questions at the same time.) So yeah, I plan the city. Mostly I make sure future generations have enough housing, even though I'm not entitled to one myself. 🤷‍♀️ I enjoy my work and I think it's fulfilling, but it's also tough and my hours are too long. One day I hope to write full-time but I really don't think it'll pay the bills. Maybe if I live somewhere cheaper than Singapore!

Quite excited to answer 8, 9 as well, but maybe those are for another day?

#author #kinda merry crisis related I guess #mostly because merry crisis is so much drawn from my own experiences #Q&A

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voidsquidd · 3 months

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//TW// Suicide + self harm + eating disorders + abuse

-MASSIVE VENT-

Things are so bad rn omg, I hate that I feel this way at all, ik it's bad and ik it's only my fault

I don't have to be there for them, I don't have to deal with all of their fucking issues but if I don't then I feel like anything bad that happens is my own fault. And bad things do happen when I'm not there to help them. Sometimes I feel like I can't actually let them be alone for a day becuz I'm sure by the end of the day they'll be about ready to kts, and that has happened before.

We didn't talk for maybe a day and they almost offed them self in that day and almost relapsed into multiple different things, it was horrible and it was my fault for not being there to comfort them for a single fucking day. I love them but I legit can't do this, I'm not going to be able to be there for them as much as they need. I've already done so much, skipped school and missed out on hanging with friends becuz they were struggling, or even just outta paranoia that something bad would happen. Hell I can't even take a bath without worrying any more becuz ofc some shit happened while I was having a bath and now I'm scared to leave them for that long without being able to check on them

I wake up I check on them, I get ready and I'm always checking thru their messages that I missed to see what they say and they almost always say something bad, I go to school and I think about them and then at break I check on them and then I do the same at lunch, once I get outta school I check on them and look at the messages I've missed. They consume every single one of my thoughts

And then they lied to me, they fucking hid things. I stood up for them and said that the whole time I've known them, they've only lied once, but turns out they had been lying the whole time I knew them, they had been hiding shit from me and then got angry with themselves when they couldn't recover while actively triggering themself and bitching bout calories, like idk maybe ur not getting better becuz ur on about trying to drop to 200 becuz u used to be able to and apparently 500 is too much for u now, so sorry the amount I eat daily is for fat ppl, and maybe ur not getting better becuz ur counting the cals of individual mushrooms. If u wanted to get better then why are u doing this, and why are u hiding it from me, why didn't u tell me, why did u say u were fine when u were thinking about killing urself and why did u say ur sh wasn't tht bad when it was, when it kept bleeding, when it was infected. And u still didn't go to a doctor for u infected cuts. And why did u say that about me? I can't look at myself anymore, I feel like my body triggers ppl but u triggered me and now I wanna starve more than ever, if u hide things and say horrible shit on secret accounts I can do the same, and I'm gonna fucking starve myself more than ever, I'm gonna go days without eating, will my body trigger u then? U won't fucking know becuz u don't have this app

They won't go to the doctor for their head injuries either, they should've months ago but always found a reason not to and now the wounds healed and they've probably got fucking brain damage, the doctors won't find shit and they'll just keep getting hurt and losing brain cells each time.

Its like they don't wanna get better with how little they listen to my advice, I'm trying to help meanwhile they're acting like what is clearly sh is fine and that they're fine.

Be fucking honest for once

If this relationship fails is becuz I lost trust after the months of lying. I've already thought about ending it multiple times becuz ik I shouldn't have to feel responsible for all this, and that they would be dead without me, but I feel bad leaving them and I still love them

It hurts me sm but I do love them a lot

And idk if I could ever leave, even if this doesn't stop, even if they keep doing this and making me panic and feel insane, even if ik they're not worth it and that I could so easily trigger them over just calling out their bullshit

I think I might start threatening to leave them, otherwise they won't listen and they won't get better

If I hurt them they'll let me becuz their standards are so low anyway

Ik I'm not perfect but I sure as hell wasn't a liar until this point, I was actually trying but now I don't feel like trying becuz I don't feel like they actually respect me, I feel like they like the fact I help them and that's it, ik they'd settle for less then me but that's becuz they've been so abused they don't know how else to be treated, I really don't need to go the extra mile to make them like me when they'd like me even if I hurt them

Ik I'm not perfect but they've pushed me too far and I can't keep doing this

I hope they somehow see this, I hope they learn how it feels, how I feel. Idk how they would find this but they better and I hope it hurts them and ik I'm shitty for wanting that and ik I'll regret this eventually, ik I will

Ik they'll cry and hurt them self and maybe attempt suicide but rn I can't care

I want them to know how it feels

#vent shit #ed vent #sh vent #personal vent #vent post #tw abuse #toxic relationship #kms #i want to ⭐️ve #i wanna lose weight #self h@rm

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thisdreamplace · 1 year

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How did you reach a place where you can be happy and full of love no matter what? I hate feeling like I’ll be unsatisfied if my desires don’t manifest. I wish I could feel totally complete without them.

honestly by being willing to totally allow myself to surrender and let go and... allow. allow in general. you have to start to value yourself more than you value whatever manifestation u think will be the trick to fixing ur life. i will be completely transparent in saying i experienced a lot of heartache and pain on this journey as a whole, mostly from the fact i was the same way for a while. i put my wholeness into the manifestations without even realizing i was doing so. so i feel for everyone who gets stuck there bc sometimes u truly think ur doing things for urself but deep down, ur still living for the hope of a desire materializing. through all this time, i cried a lot but i also broke new heights of love, peace, and beauty. and i feel so much more stable and trusting of myself than i ever have. accept that this is a journey and you're just gonna have to be there for yourself, along for the ride ! <3

to be specific, on what i actually did, i firstly took a break off tumblr as some of you know. and i immediately started questioning everything and asking myself for the answers. things that didnt feel right to me i started to reject, and i started to accept things that everyone in the community made fun of. because i didnt care about anyone's beliefs anymore, i just knew it was time for me to live a life i actually wanted. and what was popular in the community was hurting more than helping. so i went all in ! i also allowed myself to revisit topics like deattachment and letting go, which actually helped a ton. after a couple months of starting to challenge my old belief system, i started to actually live again. (yall got a light taste of this energy when i did "love me february" earlier this year bc i slowly started doing new things) i started to push myself out of my comfort zone and go do things in real life, rather than sitting in my room telling myself "i dont have to lift a finger ! if i just sit in here in my mind it will surely happen" (i got tired of telling myself that after 2 years of a rather stagnant-feeling life) so i said fuck it and started doing things. which only snowballed because then i got comfortable doing things. and now ive had so much fucking fun in my life in just the past couple months. i only say that because it still blows my mind n i am beyond thankful for my experiences this year !

what i would like to help yall understand more than anything is this life was meant to be lived and experienced, period. without even realizing it, a lot of us do put life on hold because we're too busy worrying about our manifestation arriving because we put so much weight into that being the thing that will finally be the pinnacle of happiness for us, we ignore everything else already in front of us. its truly a thing like. take it step by step, little things that are out of your norm and you will see the way life responds to you so beautifully ! i love experiencing myself through others and life as a whole n not just thru my mind sitting on my bed everyday !! its great !! but it wasnt some manifestation that got me out there, it was me being done with waiting on shit to change. i just went out there to see what happens, while also keeping my spiritual practice important to me, and it was like magic tbh.

so to simplify. challenge what doesnt feel right. allow what feels right. and allow yourself to actually live and experience life along the way. nothing that is in front of you at this moment, is an obstacle or something you need to pretend isnt there. take what you have and let it be part of what guides you. make that your goal. feeling complete. (or whatever you want, really) when that is your goal, instead of your desire, you wake up everyday and make decisions based on your true self. not that egotistic urge for results.

i hope this helps ! <3 you so deserve to live a full life, no matter what is in front of you. and the thing is that what the greats say is so true. you dont need to be so focused on a desire to force it into being. life responds to you perfectly when youre just busy loving yourself and making the most out of each day. :') things just happen with ease and so beautifully. <3

idky but this q also gives me this post’s vibes hehe ;-;

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actualbird · 11 months

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got tagged by @theres-a-bea for 15 questions for 15 mutuals tag game, thanks for the tag :D

making a separate post cuz i didnt wanna make the first one too long or ping other ppl with notifs jhVKJHSVFJKSHD

1. are you named after anyone? my legal name, yeah! thanks to the baptism requirements, ive got the name of a saint. not telling u which because it's a kinda uncommon name and i dont wanna get doxxed JVJKSDF

2. when was the last time you cried? this morning, it's part of my routine to just cry in the morning so ive gotten all the pesky emotions out of the way to function mostly normally for the rest of the day jlHVKJS

3. do you have kids? do cats count? these r my two babies, bully and gato

4. do you use sarcasm much? not very much actually!

5. what sports do you play? none. in high school intramurals, i was part of the chess team and the games of the generals team. board games and Thinking is as strenuous as my physical activity gets jkhsvjfkhsvdkf

6. first thing you notice about other people? if IRL, i notice their height. if online, i notice like.....text quirks and stuff. i also like noticing what makes people laugh, cuz i like making ppl laugh and cuz 90% of why ppl keep me around is cuz im the funny guy so i gotta make sure i do my due diligence in keeping that up JKVSKJFVSDKJHF

7. eye color? dark brown

8. scary movies or happy endings? happy endings ALWAYS. i like the angst before the storm but i love a hopeful ending. and ive got a horribly low tolerance for horror JHVSKJDFVS i get....scared very easily....

9. any special talents? too many useless party tricks....i can recite all the countries of europe from memory in under 40 seconds, i can fold a paper crane behind my back or blindfolded, i can twist my right arm 360 degrees, i can make a trilling/purring noise from my throat, i can dislocate my right shoulder. these are all SO useless. but funfact! the countries of europe thing was a talent i showed off in a JOB INTERVIEW once. and then i got hired and ive been working that job for more than a year until now jkHVKJFSDFJVJ SO HEY MAYBE USELESS PARTY TRICKS HAVE THEIR UTILITY SOMETIMES!!

10. where were you born? //taps sign of i dont wanna get doxxed HAKSJFHVS

11. what are your hobbies? reading, writing, drawing, some crafts stuff when the mood hits me (crocheting, origami, making miniatures, sewing)

12. do you have any pets? YES, there were my two babies the cats. and my family is rlly into pets so this house has more animals than humans. we also have 2 labradors, 2 beagles, 1 jack russel terrier/poodle mix, and 1 turtle. it's a fuckin zoo over here

13. how tall are you? five foot one

14. fav subject in school? english!!! anything literature!!!!!!

15. dream job? man, yall got dreams? KJHVSFSKLFSDLJ. idk im a horridly ambitious-less person nowadays. as long as i get paid and im not treated like shit, im good with that

and now to tag........ @samsspambox (I KNOW TRIXIE ALREADY TAGGED U BUT UR THE FIRST WHO COMES TO MIND JFHGVKJSDH), @lukevonhagen, and uhhhh thats everybody i feel comfortable pinging HAHA. no pressure to do it, and everyone else pls feel free to yoink the meme and do it for urself :D

#tag game #dootdootdoot #the sheer chasm of personality difference between the cats.....sillies

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chryblossomjjk · 1 year

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hi kiki !!! im pretty new here and this is the first ask i’ve sent but i just wanted to pop in and say how much i adore not only ur writing but just u in general !! both practice and imagine are incredible n i could go on and on about how much comfort ive found in ur writing and ur characters but we’d be here for DAYS… weeks even 🫣 idk how to explain this exactly but u do such a wonderful job at making the story and the characters so beautifully human… like ofc most stories keep it as realistic as possible but when i read urs i literally feel like im living the experience or watching the ppl i love from the sidelines yk?? its just so REAL and RAW and i cant get enough. when i tell u practice couple have me by the NECK like ive reread it so many times already and i find something new to love about it every single time !!! i hope everyone finds a love like theirs, truly.

and as for u, U ARE SOOO PRECIOUS. ive spent the last few days catching up on kiki lore just bc i wanted to get to know u better aside from ur works and u have stolen my heart actually !! ur so funny and down to earth and i can tell just how much u love writing and interacting with everyone and something about u and ur page is so warm and cozy and refreshing 🥺 i hope ur taking care and that u always find things that bring u joy in every day, even if it’s something little!! u deserve all the good things this world has to offer and as a new follower i cant wait to see what the future has in store for u and im so happy to experience this little journey!! and i hope u never forget how loved n valued u are, u have a beautiful heart and dont let anyone ever tell u otherwise!!

ill wrap this up bc ive already made this so long but thank u for all that u do 🥺🫂🫶🏻 u work so hard to create these amazing stories for us and i hope u know we will never take that for granted ! always remember to rest and put ur health first, i know life can get crazy so it’s important that u look after urself !!!

p.s. - so excited for the weekend i could pee my pants. u have no idea.

not sure what emoji i should go by in ur asks… hmm… maybe ⭐️? or is that taken already?

lots of love to u!!

ummm soooooo

idk what tf i've done to be deserving of such a sweet message but im literally tearing up while writing smut what have u do to me friend akejndajdnsajn

first of all, thank you so much for being here and sending in such a sweet fucking ask. i hope you're enjoying your time on here so far my love!!

and this is probably one of the biggest compliments ive ever recieved about my writing. its so reassuring so thank you so so so so much ugh! its so incredibly difficult to make things feel/sound realistic. i often mull over the same scene and dialogue over and over and over again, wondering if the conversations feel normal, or if the dialogue feels right for that specific character, so your comment literally means everything to me!! and it makes me so happy that you care about the characters like im literally fucking gushing!!

AND EXCUSE U NO YOU YOU'RE PRECIOUS AND YOU DESERVE EVERYTHING GOOD IN THE WORLD NO STFU YOU NOT ME YOUUUUUU!!!!

I LOVE YOU SO DEARLY!!!

i generally feel like i am a very annoying n extra human being lol so thank you for sticking through n reading my posts and yeah :'(( i do really love interacting with people on here and i try my best to make this blog feel as safe and inviting as possible so im it makes me saur soft that you feel that way and ugh i cant i dont even know what to say other than i love u sm my lil star friend :'))

#anon #fic: the weekend #fic: practice #fic: imagine #⭐️#bookmarking #for when i feel sad #you're the sweetest soul ever pls #lemme kiss ya >:(

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