#sorry I went off topic there 😅

[jeanmoreaux]

Just saw what you said about needing to talk about the if we were villians ending…that book was the cause of one of my first forays into fan fic but after I read the ending I was like WHAT I NEED AN ALTERNATE ONE I’m sure from a literary perspective it’s good etc or what not but it felt so unfinished to me and I was upset

no, no, i get what you mean. i think your experience is pretty common. personally, i really liked the ending. i am a huge fan of open endings/ambiguous endings/premature endings/you-name-it so i was fully on board with what m.l.rio did. i don’t think this story—with these characters—could have ended any other way. (and yeah, from a literary perspective it definitely ties into the themes explored in the book.) most of the time i am more dissatisfied with clear-cut & closed endings than with open & ambiguous ones. i enjoy having some elements of uncertainty that let’s me fill in the blanks as i see fit. (ofc some threads have to be tied up, always, but not everything needs to be resolved in the end. it really depends on the story, though.) i appreciate that much more than being given an ultimate answer to *everything*. more often than not these type of endings wrap up too neatly or nicely to feel believable.

((i actually looked at some fanfics once as well just to see what other people made of the ending. i definitely know what i make of it for myself and what i make of it from a lit analysis perspective. depending on on angle leaves quite the different aftertaste, i guess.))

#iwwv is definitely in my all time top 10 favorite books #like…the frustration of it all is the appeal to me. if that makes sense. #anyways #i went off topic again i am so so sorry. i’m in a rambling mood 😅 #hope you’re doing well <3 #anon #answer #lit: if we were villains

[stardew-shitposterino]

The Bachelors and how they’d react if you asked them to start a family

Same old same old. This post is inspired by @babiebom 's post about the bachelor/ettes and how many kids they’d have :3 I’m not really a person who is too keen on children and being a housewife, but I can’t deny that the thought of a picture perfect family does warm my heart, girlies. Enjoy 💅🏻🍼

Some answers are gender specific. I hope to anyone playing the game as a same sex couple that you can look past that 🙏🏻

Sam:

-he’d be boots the house down in total shock

-don’t get it twisted, he is ecstatic, but damn he didn’t expect it to be this soon

-of course he is excited about every life stage of his potential little ones, but he can’t wait to have someone he can teach how to skate

-„really? A-and you’re not joking or anything? RAD!“

-maybe he is a bit too excited as he‘s definitely ripping his pants off his body as soon as the message sunk in

-„Oh you didn’t mean we should start it right now? Sorry my bad 😅“

Sebastian:

-he is happy but can’t really show it

-anxiety is kicking hard rn

-it’s not that he doesn’t want this, but he has so many worries, after all he had lived through himself

-he definitely needs some time to think about this

-„Y/N, I’d really love to have this with you one day, but please give me time to adjust to this. It’s a lot for me to process.“

-he will eventually open up about it and you agree on not rushing things. If you’re an opposite sex couple, you agree on starting a family once you’re pregnant. No planning, just living and if it happens, it happens (it probably happened after like 2 months after you had the talk lol)

Elliott:

-„Heavens, Love! What wonderful news. I’ve been waiting for this moment. This will be the start of our legacy!“ (excuse me bruuuhh this is how I imagine him talk lol)

-he had heart-shaped eyes if you haven’t noticed

-as much as he loves the romance and allure of being a childless couple with a world to their feet, he can’t kick the idea of being a wholesome dad raising a curious child with his wonderful partner

-he emphasises on not rushing things as he doesn’t want you to feel pressure. He knows how stressful your job is so he doesn’t want you to feel overwhelmed though you proposed that idea first

-you can bet your ass you went to bed after that talk 👀 WHO SAID THAT 🤨

Harvey:

-he is a blushy mess thank you and amen

-he‘s so anxious but also so excited

-no way you actually proposed this to him. He actually accepted his fate as a childless bachelor

-but here he is, finally getting the happy little family he always wanted

-but it isn’t smooth sailing with him, oh no. You can bet your ass he has to calculate everything through before he feels comfortable enough starting to bring this wish to reality

-you know, you earn a shit ton of money but he is anxious ok. He needs to KNOW the child won’t end up homeless with nothing to wear once it’s here

-“Oh this is all so new and, I-I don’t even know how to say it without it sounding wrong. I just can’t grasp that this is happening. Pinch me so I know I’m not dreaming”

-you didn’t sleep with each other that day but a make-out sess was in it. A wholesome one to say the least. This man is wholesome in my books 📕

Shane:

-the only thing missing here is that he fainted and fell to the floor after you popped the question

-say WHAT NOW?!

-no way. He probably heard it wrong. You didn’t just ask HIM to have YOUR children… no wait the other way around. This is what that question did to his brain lol

-or generally having kids together. He isn’t opposed to adopting because he fears the kids will inherit his messed up brain so taking in kids that are in need of a nice, welcoming home doesn’t sound bad either

-but no wait wait back to the topic; he’s a MESS

-he always wanted children and a family in general, the very boring ass white picket fence fantasy is what he longed for but kind of accepted that it’s something he cannot have. Well guess what…HE CAN

-“wait…did you- and you mean with me? Or is there someone else I should know about? Ok sorry bad joke. But you mean it?! Really? A little sibling for Jas🥹”

-just know this burly man started crying a river of joy tears. But once the tears dried and it kicked in 👀

-“ok if we want this to work out we gotta get to business 😎”

Alex:

-like Shane, he waited for this moment

-just he isn’t anxious like some of the others, he straight up jumps for joy lol

-“BABE NO WAY! I’ve been waiting for this!”

-he is a happy crier tho. Expect him to cry a little but in a good way

-but also expect him to propose the question of having a lot more kids in the future. He wants a football team of kids. But the amount is still negotiable of course (you gave him the “spouse stare” which made him go down a notch lol)

- he will babble about what gender the first kid might be, what he’d do with them depending on it and how he’d get them the smallest grid ball jerseys you’ll ever see because “LOOK THEY ARE SO TINY”

-like some of the others, he might be a bit too eager to start the baby project. Even if you can’t conceive yourself, he will live out that fantasy. You prepared yourself for this because it was very much predictable lol

#stardew valley #sdv #sdv shane #sdv bachelors #sdv elliott #sdv Sam #sdv Alex #sdv Harvey #sdv sebastian #Stardew valley Sam #Stardew Valley Alex #Stardew valley Shane #Stardew valley Harvey #stardew valley sebastian #Stardew valley Elliott #sdv bachelor hcs #Stardew valley headcanons #sdv headcanons

[mageofseven]

The Boys Reacting to MC Calling Themself Luke's Mama

Ok so despite the feminine term, I see this for MCs of any gender being this sweet, loving mama bear to Lukey baby 🥰

•▪︎▪︎◇°●♡●°◇▪︎▪︎•

Lucifer:

"MC, the Celestial realm won't actually let you adopt him."

Pursed his lips as both MC and their new son stares daggers at him.

sighs Nevermind...

Doesn't think the conversation is worth the mental energy anymore.

Though is still worried that his love will feel even more heartbroken when Luke is sent back to the Celestial realm.

Mammon:

Actually finds it adorable that MC sees the kid in this way

Not that he'd ever admit it though.

Actively pretends he doesn't care about it at all

But in truth, his heart gets all warm when he sees his Human interact with the small boy

And is actually kinda jealous of the tenderness from their parent-child relationship.

Leviathan:

Bro is so jealous.

Levi often complains about it and calls it "weird".

Made the mistake of calling it that in front of Luke one day

And the small boy actually kicked him for hurting his Mama's feelings!

This man almost summoned Lotan on this boy's ass

But luckily didn't because Lucifer was there

So instead Levi just went to his room and pouted about the attention his Henry was giving the angel.

Satan:

Finds it mildly strange, but really has no issue with it.

He knows his Kitten is a really loving person with a soft spot for kids

And ultimately is happy that the small boy brings them so much comfort.

Does worry about how they'll handle it when the young angel is sent back to the Celestial realm

But decides that it's better left for another time.

Right now, the boy makes his Kitten happy and that's what matters.

Asmodeus:

Find their relationship super cute!

And tries to get Luke to call him 'Papa'

Which doesn't work in the slightest and just makes the angel boy annoyed.

He's still happy for his Dolly though and likes that the child is so good to them.

Beelzebub:

Oh boy, does this man want kids

Like right now.

Their relationship really makes his baby fever worse

But he's still really happy for his Muffin and Luke.

Does wish Luke would also call him 'Papa', but does not want to make the child uncomfortable.

Enjoys spending time with the two and watching the human be all motherly to the angel

And often imagines them being that way to a child they make together.

MC, maybe you should make Lukey a sibling? Like, as soon as possible lol

Belphegor:

Is honestly very annoyed by it.

Like, no you freaking chihuahua, they are not gonna bake or play a game with you

We are napping.

Sadly gets into some arguments with MC over this

Because dude, you did not just speak to their son that way.

Luke may be the child in this scenario, but Belphie is definitely the brat.

This stubborn man has learned to apologize after these situations because MC is just as stubborn, if not more than him

And literally won't even look at him till he apologizes.

To make matters worse, it's not them he has to apologize to

It's Luke

And by the devil, this man hates apologizing to that little gremlin.

Diavolo:

Finds their relationship so adorable and tells them that every day!

Honestly, it makes Luke blush more than it makes his Queen.

The angelic child doesn't mind this though

And honestly wishes he could call Diavolo 'Papa' too

Something that Diavolo also wishes from the small angel

But boy would that have a lot of heavy political implications that would set people off, both in his realm and in the Celestial realm.

Sorry boys 😅

Still, MC's incredible love and care towards the child is beautiful to the prince, who starts showing Luke the same from himself.

Another man whose baby fever gets sparked up, but unlike Beel, is somewhat nervous to bring up the topic to MC.

After all, any children that come from him would be tethered to the Royal Family and the Devildom as a whole, which is a lot of pressure

Something he worries about putting on his love and their potential child.

So for now, he just enjoys spending with MC and Luke

And dreams of having a child of MC and his own.

Barbatos:

Barb has always been one to like kids, so to see his partner has such a strong love for this angelic child really warms his heart.

Barb already cares about Luke a lot at this point and is very grateful for his stay in the Devildom.

Luke is his little baking buddy and it would be a lie to say he hasn't grown found of him.

However, this butler is also realistic; he knows the child will eventually be whisked back up to the Celestial realm

And he and MC may not see him again.

Has this conversation with his love, but only once.

Doesn't want to hurt the human, but wants to make sure they know how this will eventually end.

Overall, loves their cute little parent-child relationship

And makes the butler think...what if--

But no. It would be much better if he and MC do not have children.

With his job, it wouldn't be fair for the child to not get the attention they deserve because he is constantly working.

That and his...'gift'; he would never want to risk his child inheriting it

And the pain that comes along with it.

Solomon:

Finds it really cute how attached his little minx has gotten to the angel.

Honestly, Soli already sees Luke as a little brother to him so he can see why the fellow human is so attached to the child.

Doesn't see himself as Luke's father because the sorcerer really has trouble imagining himself as parent

But has no issue in his little minx seeing themself as Luke's 'mama' instead of their sibling.

MC and Luke are happy and that's what matters to the man.

Unlike the others, Solomon isn't worried about Luke getting whisked away to the Celestial realm.

This sorcerer was one of the few non angels to have more or less full access to the angel homeland

One of the perks of being a former servant to their Father.

Soli was so sure that even if Luke had to go back up to his realm that he could get some strings pulled to get MC brought up to visit him.

So no worries from this man; he lets his little minx love their new 'son' as much as they want to.

These two will never be separated for long; not if he has a say in it.

Simeon:

Honestly, this man is conflicted about their relationship.

Simeon loves little Luke and loves being his guardian

So he loves seeing how well the child and his secret partner get along.

This man also feels guilty that he can never give MC the child from him that they really want since it was a general belief that angels cannot procreate.

The human so desperately wanted a child and Luke enjoyed getting to see what it was like to have a 'mama'.

The two were happy and he loved that for them.

However, at some point, Michael will ask him to send Luke home

And the boyfriend will have no choice but to take the sweet boy away from his new 'mama'

And the idea pained him severely.

He never wanted to hurt his Feather or young Luke

But someday...he just might be forced to

And the thought killed him inside.

#obey me #obey me otome #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me belphegor #obey me brothers #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me solomon #obey me simeon #obey me luke #obey me undateables

[writersblockiskillingme]

The Sound Of The Woman Who Loved Her | Katniss Everdeen

Pairing: Katniss Everdeen x fem!reader (District11!reader)

Summary: Katniss needed to survive her games no matter the cost. So the new Capitol's darling does come in handy.

Warning/s: angst, betrayal, using someone for your own benefit, Capitol elite, kind of evil!Katniss, one sided love, lying, short fic (this is more like a blurb, honestly), possible grammar and spelling mistakes

Author's note: I can't edit the asks after I save them, so I copied the request like this. I'm dumb, sorry. 😅

Request: @f4riedimples -> I just rlly need Katniss admitting that she started out the relationship using (District 11) reader. Like say reader got treated like capitol after winning her games so after Katniss came back from the 74th they started dating. And just a night before the quarter quell she admitted that she used r?🤌

You were one of the unfortunate, unlucky, people of Panem. Being chosen for your games at 15 wasn't something that you ever wished for anyone including yourself.

But it seemed like your luck started to turn around as you won your games.

People that lived in the Capitol adored you. A young jewel from District 11. As you grew up so did the love of the Capitol's elite for you. You didn't like it one bit, but it did give you some advantages. Just like some disadvantages.

Katniss went into her games a year after you, so you were both 16 at the time. She was lucky she made it out, everyone agreed with that. But just as you got a little taste of luck in your life, everything started to shift around once you met the girl on fire from District 12.

She was desperate. Katniss new that. Since the year you won your games nobody ever stopped talking about you. You were the hot topic on everybody's tongue.

So when Katniss started her Victor's Tour and she realized in just how much trouble she was in, giving the spark of hope during her games, she knew that her family, friends and her needed protection. She was willing to do anything for it. No matter the cost.

Katniss Everdeen heard about you, how could she not? A shiny jewel from 11 that somehow ended up being treated as if she was from Capitol. As if she was one of them. She knew that if she had you not even president Snow, to whom you had become very indenting because of the love his granddaughter had for you, could bring any harm to her family.

She could remember that day as if was yesterday. You were standing behind her, looking gorgeous as ever. She still didn't truly understand how she pulled that act off. But by the end of the month you were officially her girlfriend.

Katniss noticed, as the time passed, that she gained more respect amongst the Capitol elite and for a moment it seemed as if they treated her as almost an equal, too.

Everything was going amazingly up until another party at the Capitol at which she was invited as your guest.

Perhaps it was her lack of self awareness.

Perhaps it was her idiocy at that moment.

Perhaps it was her recklessness.

Perhaps it was too much alcohol that she drank in hopes of drowning the everlasting guilt in the pit of her stomach that grew every single day.

Or perhaps it was the fact that she didn't love you like you loved her. She didn't love you at all. She only loved the benefits that came to her on a silver plate since she was dating you.

"Katniss," your angelic voice that usually sounded like the sweetest song caused by a bunch of little bells now, to her drunk mind, sounded piercing as it reached her ears. "Are you all right?"

"Y-ye-yeah." She slurred and felt herself flinch a little bit. She sounded just like Haymitch did when he drowned himself in alcohol all day back in District 12.

At that moment she noticed that she overdid it, and worst of all, you noticed it, too.

"I think it's time to call it quits," You offered her in, what almost was, a quiet whisper. "Hmm? How about I take you back to the penthouse?"

"N-no," Katniss drunkenly waved you off. "I'm f-fine."

"Katniss," You couldn't help but to let out a sigh that somehow escaped past your lips that were unnatural red color caused by some expensive Capitol's lipstick. "I'm just worried that-"

"Oh, you worry so much don't you!" Katniss snarled at you because, thankfully, she still had half the mind to know that if anyone heard you, you both would be in big trouble.

"Katniss, I love you and I just want to help-"

"Well guess what?" Katniss hissed, grabbing another glass that contained some sort of shiny liquid. "I don't love you."

Your world stopped for a moment as you froze, listening to her. You couldn't believe what was coming out of her mouth. You couldn't believe that this is the person you fell for. The person that you grew to know and love. But now, as you watched her and listened to her speak... perhaps you didn't know her at all.

"I don't love you at all!" She continued to mindlessly whisper to you, not caring about the amount hurt that she caused you at that moment. "I never loved you. But God..." she sighed for a moment, looking at the ground before she looked up at the night sky. "You were truly a jewel. So easy to use. So easy to manipulate into loving me even though I don't feel the same at all."

You were frozen. Nothing existed to you at that moment except for her, her words and one loose tear that rolled down your face as she whispered what you actually ment to her.

"Snow's precious victor. Capitol's little jewel..." she continued to rant, somehow not slurring anymore. "I despise you so much, but at least I got something useful from you. Useful. That's all you have ever been to me."

At that moment Katniss looked up, but you were gone. She would perhaps feel a bit bad about it the next day, she could easily say that she was drugged or something else caused her to say such lies. But they weren't lies and you knew it.

But there was something that Katniss didn't realize at the moment, but will later on.

She will never truly escape the sound of the woman who loved her.

->

->

->

TAGLIST:

@caroline-books @thecrowdedstreetin1944

#imagine #fic #the hunger games #thg #the hunger games fic #the hunger games fanfiction #the hunger games katniss #the hunger games books #the hunger games movie #katniss everdeen #katniss everdeen x reader #katniss everdeen x you #katniss x reader #thg katniss #jennifer lawrence #jennifer lawrence x reader #angst #district 12 #district 11 #lesbian #bisexual

[sugar-omi]

On the topic of moisturizing our ocean boy's lips... May I add a lil' idea on how making things easier...?

First: apply a very generous amount of your fav lipbalm on your lips.

Second: lightly tap the corner of your mouth with your index with an innocent smile and say "Cove, it's lipcare time, baby".

Third: Indulge and enjoy.

Somehow, I've got the feeling that Cove would be a real threat to MC's scented lipbalms/lipsticks/lipglosses. You know, like when you can't help but eat your lipstick once applied, because it's tasty and it becomes a habbit you absent-mindedly do...? Well, I kinda hc him doing the same, but to MC's lips.

I think it'd even reach a point where MC'd have a stack of lipsticks/balms only for his personal use (on MC's mouth). Pricey lipsticks would be worn only when sure he'd not be around. And i think he might pout and feel "cheated" if MC would ever dare wearing one of those long-lasting lipsticks (because he enjoys having you apply, re apply and re-re apply your gloss, so he can have seconds, thirds, as much as he wants, MC's mouth literally becomes Free Dessert Buffet to him).

Downside of it... your make up budget might explode, with how fast those lipsticks and balms are finished.

There's this french brand which sells this absolutely delicious lipbalm made with honey. You literally wanna scoop it from the bottle and eat it. Also, it's the kind of really rich and thick, blanket-like texture you'd apply before sleep. So if MC ever uses it... they'd probably have to either try keeping Cove away from their lips (at least enough time for the product to do its job on their lips), or benevolently sharing (cause it's caring), or resign to plan their lip moisturizing routine another day... or hide while doing it.

I think lipsticks/balms would end up being one of the most fav items Cove would gift them...

Sorry, I went a bit overboard with the topic... 😅

Rambling anon -

THIS IS SO GOOD

MC putting on one of their nicer lipsticks/glosses, or putting a lotta time/effort into their lips and limiting cove to 1 or 2 pecks. PECKS. not kisses. PECKS.

cove is pouting, his distraught... he just wants to kiss you, your lips look so nice n juicy n shiny and-

he needs his fix.

definitely make him buy some if not all your lip products. if he wants to keep kissing you silly, wants to keep smudging your lipstick/gloss n making it so obvious what you were just up to, then he needs to pay for it!!!!

imagine giving him a lil peck, and then it turns to 3, than 5, and now you're just kissing... your lip is totally ruined, lipstick n carefully lined lips totally smudged.

don't ask if he's proud of himself because he'll just laugh n rub his arm. or maybe he's just looking at you all love-drunk. doesn't care about all the lipstick staining his lips... hopefully no one walks around the corner this time

liz did once, n she does not let you live in it down... specifically cove. always teasing him with, "cove, theres lipstick on your chin" and snickering hysterically when he slaps a hand over his mouth n chin, trying to wipe off the "lipstick"

(she did it once, being totally serious, and cove was like "im not falling for that again >:(" and went to work with your lipstick on his lips...)

yall definitely lip makeup wipes n a compact mirror on hand at this point...

#olba #cove holden #cove holden x reader #fluff

[slasherfckr]

Hello! I just wanted to say I love everything that you have written, but my favorite, and the one I'm hoping to get a part two for, is the Thomas Hewitt x reader where the rest of the Hewitt family dies, and the reader takes Thomas in. It's really really good! I love the way that you have written it! Maybe for part two it can be the reader taking Thomas clothing shopping for the first time? Or to see a movie in theaters? They seem like things that he wouldn't have done for a long time, if ever.

Well now that you mention it, I have part 2 right here actually ☺️😅

-Part 1 can be found here

(Tag list: @goodiesinthecloset21 )

Thomas Hewitt x afab!Reader - Found Family (pt 2 of the Modern Living)

Just gonna call it Found Family from now on

------------------------------------------

You found a man in the middle of a horrible car accident in the middle of nowhere in Texas...and against your better judgement, you took him home and patched him up as best you could. You fed him dinner and found an outfit that just barely fit him. You knew taking in a stranger was insanely stupid and dangerous but you couldn't help but feel sorry for him...

------------------------------------------

After a few nights, you figured you could trust the man. At least a little bit. If he was going to rob you or harm you in anyway, you figured he would have done it already. He was so much bigger than you, he could have snapped you in half like a twig if he felt like it. You couldn't trust him completely, though, so you stayed out from the bakery until you felt you could trust him alone in your apartment by himself.

This particular morning, you were woken up earlier than usual by the sound of your TV. After quickly getting something decent on, you went out to your living room and found Thomas on the couch watching the morning news. Something about numerous murders in the area or something. Basically the same old stuff that was usually on the Dallas News. Though, it was odd to be reporting murders this early in the day. They usually did that in the evenings....

Shrugging off the odd feeling, you went and started making some french toast for the both of you. Today you were taking Thomas out clothes shopping before you put him to work in your shop. You weren't sure how Thomas was going to feel, though. When you first met him and took him back to your place, he seemed extremely uneasy once you two hit the big city. It was like it was the first time he'd been in such a big place before.

It wasn't long before breakfast was done, and so you called Thomas to come and eat. Except he didn't move an inch from the couch. You called his name again and still no movement from the man. You carefully walked over to him and saw his eyes fixed on the TV, his fists clenched so tightly you could see slight amounts of blood trickling out from where his nails dug into his palms.

"Oh my God, Thomas! Hold on lemme help..." You went to the kitchen and grabbed a clean rag and ran it under some cold water. Coming back, you went to open up his hands but you must have startled the man because he flinched and pulled his arm away from you. He looked down at you and that's when you noticed he didn't have his mask on. You also immediately noticed the anger and hatred that filled his eyes. You had no idea what you could have done to piss him off

That's when you remembered the TV. The news moved onto the next topic by this point but you remember they said there had been a few murders.

"Those deaths...that wasn't anyone you knew...was it?" He wouldn't look at you at this point and had already opened up his fists so you could clean up the little blood that was on his hands. He had never spoken a single word to you, only signed stuff when he needed to say something, but you swore you could have heard a soft "yes" come from his mouth.

You felt your stomach drop. Was that why he was alone that night? His family or whoever had died? You tried your hardest to focus on cleaning up his hands but it was almost impossible. So many thoughts were running through your head. You somehow managed to finish and got up to go toss the rag into your laundry hamper.

You came back and immediately sat next to Thomas. You didn't know him very well but you could tell he was going through something. If that was his family on the news, he didn't deserve to grieve alone like this. You scooted next to him very carefully and gently put one of your hands on top of his. He looked over at you.

"You know, I was going to take you out to do some clothes shopping since you don't have anything. But I can see you're going through something. I don't know who that was on the news but you obviously knew them. I know what its like to lose someone. I...I lost my parents when I was 8. If you...need anything just let me know okay? Would you like a hug at all?"

Thomas didn't move for a minute before his huge arms suddenly embraced you. You thought you were either going to pass out or your head was going to pop off due to how tight he was squeezing you. You tried your best to bring your arms up to hug him back but it was futile. They were stuck to your sides. You couldn't even move them to tap out. Though, to say you didn't enjoy this would be a lie. Your head was right on his chest and you could hear his heart beating. If you weren't struggling to breathe, you actually wouldn't mind being like this for a good while

Thomas eventually caught on to your squirming and let go. You took a few much needed breaths as he did. You looked up at him and saw his eyes were a bit wider than usual. Guess he was afraid he squashed you a little too much? You laughed.

"Don't worry. I'm fine. Hmm...since clothes shopping has to wait til another day, would you like to just have a lazy day and watch some movies? I can go down to the bakery and snag some sweet treats for us to share."

His eyes lit up at the mention of stealing getting some treats from the bakery. You smiled as you got up and went over to the big cabinet by the TV. You opened it and looked to Thomas.

"Okay so its settled then. A movie night. Come pick out a few movies for us to watch. I'll go down and get some sweets for us and then order some pizza too when I come back. Alright?"

Thomas nodded as you went off to go score some cupcakes or something from the bakery. When you came back, you saw Thomas had picked out at least 5 movies. Though you were a little disappointed to see he had put his mask back on. That reminded you, though, that you needed to get that thing washed.

You saw that they were a wide range of movies, ranging from horror classics like The Thing to family friendly classics like Wizard of Oz. You absolutely loved a good John Carpenter movie so of course you picked that one up first to put in. It wasn't until you got to the intro of the movie that you realized you didn't know how well Thomas handled horror and gore. He could easily be given numerous weeks worth of nightmares from the next movie on the list, "A Nightmare on Elm Street"

You paused the movie.

"Sorry, sorry! I completely forgot to ask...do you handle horror movies well? You picked out a couple that kind of get pretty gorey. Like, I know you picked them out and that should be an indicator that you know but I still got to ask. I had a friend say they handle really graphic movies well then freak out during Hellraiser. I just don't want to get you freaked out tonight or anything, ya know?"

Thomas gave a nod and signed he was fine with horror. You sighed with relief and resumed the movie. The rest of the night went great. Thomas was right. He had no problem with the horror movies. In fact, it seemed like he was amazed with not just the horror movies but ALL the movies he picked. It was like....

"Hey Thomas? Have you ever seen a movie before? Like. A movie movie? Not a cartoon on TV that you usually watch in the mornings. Was this your first time watching a movie?"

You were a little shocked when he signed back that it was his first time. He's never seen a movie before???

"If its your first time seeing a movie then I wonder what else you've never gotten to do. We'll check later. As for now, I gotta get some sleep because I have to be up early to get back to the bakery....I've missed too many days already. Goodnight Thomas."

You were about to walk away when Thomas all of a sudden grabbed your hand and pulled you down onto him, causing you to fall onto his lap. He quickly braced you in another bear hug. You could actually move and breathe this time so you gave him the biggest hug you could give back.

"What's this for?" You laughed a little

Thomas didn't say or sign anything. He just kept hugging you. After a minute, he let you go before signing a simple Thank You.

You smiled and nodded to him before going to your room. You knew you shouldn't be getting so comfortable with a man you met just two weeks ago but you couldn't help it. He was sweet and after what happened today, you couldn't help but feel a bit sorry for him. The man had just lost his family when you met him. You couldn't just let him go out on his own. You were all he had as far as you knew. Tonight you were gonna get some sleep, tomorrow you could work on digging into his background a bit more.

#texas chainsaw massacre #slasher fucker #slasher x reader #thomas hewitt #thomas hewitt x reader #leatherface #leatherface x reader #texas chainsaw the beginning

[weirdkpopgirl]

My First | Renjun Fic #2

Title: My First

Genre: high school au, angst

Warnings: mentions of self-harm, divorce, abusive parent. please don't read if any of these topics make you uncomfortable

Word Count: ~13k

Author's Note: I originally posted this book on wattpad, but not many people read it. So I decided to consolidate the book into a full-length fic to post here on tumblr and my nct dream book on wattpad. I wrote this story years ago, inspired by a brief crush I had in high school. I really hope you guys like this story ^ ^

P.S. there may or may not be a sequel to this 😅

*song mentioned is Sorry Heart by NCT Dream*

𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪

A small high school reunion was underway, hosted by Lee Haechan at a fried chicken restaurant he had opened some time ago. Even amidst his hectic commitments, Rejun made sure with his managers that his schedule would be done by the evening. After all, he couldn’t miss this occasion. Not when this was his chance to see her again.

He discreetly entered the restaurant, donning a mask and a black cap to maintain his anonymity until he had fully entered the premises.

Suddenly, he heard the voice of his old friend exclaim, “There he is! The global K-pop sensation!” 

Renjun chuckled bashfully as a wave of applause and cheers echoed Haechan's proclamation. Taking a seat, he scanned the room, searching for a familiar face among his former classmates.

“She should be here soon,” Haechan whispered, his hand resting on Renjun’s shoulder as a glass of soju was poured for him. Renjun nodded and allowed himself to unwind for the time being.

After a few drinks, the restaurant's front doors chimed, and Renjun swiftly turned his head to witness the entrance of two individuals. And there she stood, nearly everything about her appearance was the same since high school. Her hair remained long, now adorned with a reddish hue. The melancholy that once clouded her eyes was replaced with a sparkle he never saw in her before. The smile he loved so much hadn’t changed at all. Yet, he knew that smile on her face wasn’t because of him. But it was because of the man whose gentle hand rested on her back. 

Renjun couldn't deny that the sight caused a subtle ache within him, breaking his heart a little. He guessed he deserved this feeling though. Especially considering he was the one who had broken hers in the first place.

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She remembered the first time she laid eyes on him, a memory that stood apart from his initial introduction as a transfer student from Jilin, China, at the beginning of high school. She had been rather inattentive back then. This was that one moment when she truly noticed him.

In her oblivious state, she hadn't even realized they lived in the same neighborhood until that day. As was her usual routine, she got off the bus, and there he was, standing at the crosswalk.

Initially, she was about to walk straight to her house without a second thought. But her steps halted when she witnessed an elderly lady struggling with several heavy grocery bags. It was evident that the weight was taking a toll on her. Before she could rush to her assistance, the boy beat her to it.

“Halmeoni,” he spoke kindly, offering a warm smile, “Let me help you.”

He gently took the bags from the lady's hands, and the woman chuckled, tenderly pinching his cheek. She observed them strolling down the street, engaged in cheerful small talk. Their smiles were infectious, and she found herself smiling too.

As they completed their short trip across the street and exchanged farewells, he seemed to sense someone's gaze upon him. Before she could react, their eyes met. In that instant, her brain went into a mild panic, and she turned away, hurrying home without looking back.

No, it wasn't as though she had fallen head over heels for him on that day. Such emotions didn't come easily to her, it seemed. She had simply become more aware of his existence. Unfortunately, she had never mustered the courage to strike up a conversation with the boy. Despite attending the same school, she was absorbed in her studies and lacked the confidence to approach him. The art of making friends was something she had never been adept at.

She didn’t bother to say anything to him in school and she didn’t expect him to either. But for some reason, knowing that bothered her. She couldn't quite explain the feeling. After all, she didn't know him beyond that one act of kindness, even though she was sure it wasn't his first.

Little did she realize that this encounter had only marked the beginning of their story.

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She remembered the next day when he stepped into their homeroom. Their eyes met once more, a scene that could have been plucked from a cliché K-drama. For precisely three seconds, she maintained eye contact with him before her gaze dropped to her desk.

That was the day she finally recalled his name when the teacher called for attendance – Huang Renjun. If not for his introduction, she might have not realized he was Chinese. Partially because she had initially believed his last name to be Hwang. His Korean proficiency further blurred the lines, matching her own.

Each time Renjun spoke in class, she couldn't help but be impressed by his fluency. A classmate mentioned that he had taken Korean as an elective at his previous school.

Nonetheless, she didn't engage in much conversation with him in the early days of the school year, despite the fact that they shared a classroom nearly every day, with their desks not being too distant from each other. Their circles of friends were also closely-knit. Besides the few friends she had made at school, she rarely ventured to talk to anyone else.

However, she found herself unable to cease her contemplation of him. Occasionally, her gaze would stray from her textbook, and she'd spot the dark brown-haired boy a few desks ahead. A slight lean to the left allowed her to observe him diligently taking notes during the teacher's lectures.

Before Renjun, she had never really paid attention to boys. To this day, she remained uncertain about what exactly drew her to him. Perhaps it was his refined facial features, their shared artistic inclinations, or the way he displayed irritation and endearing cuteness when angered. It might have been the enchanting hums he produced while listening to songs from his playlist on their bus rides home.

Some might have labeled her an obsessive stalker, but anyone would have noticed the same subtle details if they had taken a second to observe him. Living in the same neighborhood and attending the same school merely facilitated this connection.

Renjun and she were so close, yet so far away at the same time.

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She remembered their first real encounter quite fondly. It occurred close to the second month of school when one of her friends attempted to persuade her into joining their study group.

“You should join us, (Y/n),” her friend said, trying to convince her for the nth time.

She nervously bit her lip and hesitated, “I don't know…”

Her study habits usually involved solitary efforts or the occasional study session with a single companion. The idea of meeting up with a group of unfamiliar faces didn't particularly appeal to her.

Furthermore, her friend mentioned that part of the reason for forming this study group was to create opportunities for getting closer to some of the cute and popular guys in their homeroom. She couldn't shake the feeling that they wouldn't be doing much actual studying.

“Can you at least come to one meeting?” her friend implored, holding up a single finger. “That's all I'm asking for!”

Reluctantly, she ended up agreeing because she didn’t want to disappoint her friend. After all, she knew that friend would never lead her into doing something crazy. Thus, she arrived at the cafe with the intention of sitting at the end of the table, where she could quietly focus on her studies and avoid interaction with the rest of the group as much as possible.

As much as she had hesitated about attending, she had always been an early bird when it came to events like this. Tardiness had always been one of her pet peeves. Little did she anticipate being one of the first to arrive.

To her luck, the one other person already present was him.

Her body froze as she entered the moment she saw Renjun seated at the empty table with his books spread out before him. He wore a light orange hoodie and round-shaped glasses. Her eyes shifted to the white sweatshirt she was wearing, and she habitually adjusted her own glasses, no longer self-conscious about dressing casually.

Noticing that he wasn't by himself anymore, Renjun's eyes met hers once more. It felt reminiscent of a few weeks ago, but she couldn't tell if he recognized her. Unlike the last time, she managed to resist the impulse to run away when he spoke first.

“Are you here for the study group too?” he inquired.

For some inexplicable reason, words failed to escape her lips, so she simply nodded in response.

Renjun’s smile put her at ease, “That's a relief. I was beginning to worry that I was pranked into coming here alone.”

“Oh, I see…” She awkwardly averted her gaze, focusing on her shoes, unable to maintain eye contact for more than a few seconds.

He gestured to the chair beside him, “Um— you can sit here if you want.”

Taking a deep breath, she composed herself before taking a seat. She did her best to collect her thoughts and not appear foolish.

“Thank you,” she murmured as she set her bag down.

Swiftly, she retrieved her homework, diverting her attention from the boy next to her. However, as she did so, her gaze accidentally met him once again. His smile was far warmer than she had imagined it to be.

"You're Kim (Y/n), right?"

“You know me?” The surprise must have been evident on her face because Renjun regarded her as if she had asked an obvious question.

“Of course. We’re in the same class, and I've seen you in my neighborhood a few times,” he explained. “How would I not know you?”

It dawned on her that she wasn't the only one who had noticed those coincidences that connected them. He had been aware of her existence all along. There was no reason for her to have felt invisible. Why had she entertained such thoughts before?

“Oh, right,” her eyes dropped to her homework in embarrassment.

Renjun chuckled and tapped his pencil on her notebook, “Did you understand the math homework?”

“Yeah, I think so,” she replied as she skimmed over the math problems they had to solve.

Math wasn't her strongest subject, but it wasn't her weakest either. The same could be said for her other classes. She excelled in any class related to the fine arts.

“I'm not sure when the others are going to get here,” Renjun remarked, “So do you want to work on this and check our answers together?”

“Oh— sure,” she said, picking up her pencil, relieved to finally engage in productive work. She had been worried that attending this gathering would be a waste of study time. 

However, she and Renjun were both diligent students, sharing the same goal of completing their work as efficiently as possible.

Working together in a tranquil atmosphere, she started to relax. But, eventually, their friends began to arrive.

“Oh, you guys are here already!” the friend who had invited her exclaimed. She sighed, a tad disappointed that everyone was here now. Still, she concealed her frustration with a smile and waved at her friend.

The study group unfolded precisely as she had expected, with little actual studying being accomplished. Most of the group members engaged in chatter and jokes. Renjun and she, on the other hand, remained seated at the corner of the table, quietly working on their homework and occasionally helping each other if they encountered difficulties.

After about two hours, everyone started to disperse. It was already dark outside as she stepped out. Since they were both headed in the same direction, Renjun suggested they take the bus together. He gave the excuse that it would be dangerous for her to go home alone.

With rosy cheeks, she glanced down at her shoes and allowed him to accompany her to the bus stop. His actions reinforced her initial impression of Renjun as a kindhearted person.

Upon boarding the bus, few words were exchanged. Yet, the silence between them didn't feel as awkward as it had earlier. She gazed out of the bus window, watching as cars and buildings passed by. Occasionally, she noticed him stealing glances in her direction from the corner of her eye, and she hesitantly turned around once, only for him to quickly avert his gaze. Perhaps her initial interpretation had been mere wishful thinking.

Her attention returned to the window, and she couldn't help but smile, reflecting on the subtle shade of red that colored his cheeks. It was undeniably cute.

As they disembarked from the bus, Renjun scratched his head and avoided her gaze.

"I guess I'll see you at school on Monday?"

She slowly nodded, "Yeah."

"I guess I'll get going then."

Before she could watch him leave, she suddenly called out, “Wait!”

When he turned back to look at her, she smiled bashfully, “It was nice to meet you, Huang Renjun.” In return, he offered a smile just as warm as the first time.

“Same to you, Kim (Y/n).”

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She remembered the change when she returned to school on Monday. Upon entering the classroom, Renjun warmly waved at her, and she shyly waved back before taking her seat. It felt peculiar to have someone other than Soojin greet her with such enthusiasm.

After their last class of the day, Renjun approached her desk with hesitation, inquiring whether she'd be interested in studying together more often. He mentioned that they got along well and he felt more comfortable studying with her rather than with the group from the previous day. The fact that Huang Renjun, whom she had never interacted with before, was extending this invitation felt unfamiliar.

“There's a library near the school where we can go,” he mumbled nervously, his confidence waning with each word.

In retrospect, she realized she should have declined at that moment, perhaps questioning why he wanted to spend time with her of all people. Turning him down then might have shielded her from the tangled web she was about to weave.

However, she couldn't resist a shy smile and accepted his invitation. Her rationale was that she preferred studying with one person over a large group, but also because she saw an opportunity to get to know the intriguing boy who had captured her curiosity.

Her hopes were met, as they began meeting at the library once a week to do homework or prepare for exams. Once a week quickly escalated to twice a week, and soon, they were seeing each other nearly every weekend.

Through those encounters, she learned quite a bit about Renjun, and she believed he was also getting to know her, to some extent. It would be a while before he truly understood her.

“Hey (Y/n),” he said one day, his tone laced with concern. “You're not usually this quiet. Are you okay?”

Lifting her head from her laptop, she met his worried expression, the first time she noticed how his chocolate brown eyes sparkled when the light hit just right. His soft gaze made her want to answer honestly, but she had grown accustomed to concealing her true feelings, even from herself. So, she responded with the same excuse she used whenever her friend posed that question.

“Oh, I'm... I'm just tired, that's all! I'm fine.”

He nodded and returned to his work without further inquiry, though she could sense his desire to probe deeper. Several such instances occurred between them, but she always held back, no matter how much she longed to reveal her true thoughts.

At times, she found herself wishing they hadn't crossed paths from the beginning.

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She remembered returning home each day, where her school life came to a pause and her personal life resumed. Upon entering through the front door, she was met by a towering stack of boxes and several others that crowded one end of the sofa. To any guest, it would appear as though they were in the middle of moving. However, they weren't. At least not at the time.

Ironically, despite her typically organized and minimalist lifestyle, she was no longer fazed by the clutter. Kicking off her well-worn sneakers and placing them on the shoe tray, she hung up her jacket and felt a wave of relief as she discarded her bag.

She picked up her bag once more, intending to carry it upstairs to her room. Just as she reached the top of the stairs, a voice interrupted her.

“Kim (Y/n). You don't even say hi to your mother?”

She held back from scoffing as her mother walked past her. Shaking her head, she continued to ignore her, as was her usual practice, and pushed open the door to her room. Her bag fell to the floor in the corner by her desk.

There was nothing particularly noteworthy about her room. She owned only the essentials: a bed, a dresser, an alarm clock, and a desk. However, it was the only place where the real her was revealed, not the persona she presented to the world, nor the facade of strength she wore despite being the weakest person she knew.

Taking a seat in front of her desk on the swivel chair, she sighed. Slowly, her hand reached for her sleeve and began rolling it up, revealing scars that had yet to fully heal. Ugly slashes of red and pink extended from her upper arm and stopped halfway at her forearm.

Laughing to herself, she clenched her fists. These scars served as a reminder of her brokenness.

Even someone like Huang Renjun couldn't rescue her from herself.

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She remembered the day after school when she was listening to music while waiting for the bus. As she scrolled through her saved albums, a message notification unexpectedly appeared.

Mom: (Y/n), I've started applying for job opportunities, but I'll also be receiving financial support from your father before leaving him. If you move in with me, you can have your own room and everything

After reading the message once, she took a deep breath and swiped it away. Gently inserting her earbuds into her ears, she turned up the volume on her phone, allowing the current song to engulf her ears, if only for a few minutes, to temporarily forget everything. However, her solitude was soon disrupted by someone taking a seat next to her at the bus stop. She immediately recognized him as Renjun.

“What are you listening to?” he asked.

She removed one earbud and handed it to him, inviting him to listen along with her. He smiled and plugged the earbud into his left ear.

“Oh, I know this song.” His eyes lit up as he began to sing along. The current track playing was “Don’t Go” by EXO. 

While he sang, she stared at him in a daze. “I didn't know you could sing,” she mumbled when the song ended.

Blushing, he cast his eyes downward. “I used to dream of becoming a singer like Rain or someone.”

“Do you not want to be a singer anymore?”

With some hesitation, he responded, “Entering the entertainment field is risky. The chances of someone like me getting in and achieving success are quite low.”

Before she could offer a proper reply, the bus arrived, momentarily interrupting their conversation. As they took their seats, Renjun began recommending songs and other artists she should explore. Nevertheless, her thoughts kept returning to what he had said earlier. She understood why he held those reservations. Someone as cautious as herself couldn't disagree.

That summer, she and Renjun spent a lot of time together. There were no formal plans or scheduled meetups; their interactions occurred naturally. If she was in one place, he would show up, and vice versa. In their moments alone, he would sing a few songs when she asked.

Unbeknownst to her, she found herself captivated by his voice. It was so clear and pleasant to the ear. She struggled to comprehend why he had abandoned his dream of becoming a singer, as it was evident that singing brought him immense joy.

“Your voice is so beautiful,” she mustered the courage to tell him one day. “I think if you debuted as a k-pop idol, you'd definitely make it.”

He looked up and smiled at her. “Thank you for saying that. But I believe it's wiser for me to attend university and secure a well-paying job.”

“You want to be just like everyone else?" she asked, wondering in the back of her mind if her question sounded too critical.

Renjun sighed, “It's a naive dream that's long behind me now. It doesn't matter anymore.”

Her lips formed a frown at his words, but she refrained from further comment. At the time, he seemed resolute in his choices. She had even thought to herself that perhaps it was for the best. If he had become a famous singer, he might have forgotten all about her.

Little did she know then how their lives would ultimately unfold, marked by contradictions.

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She remembered the last weekend before school was set to begin again. It was the first time she had been invited to his house, as his parents were away on a short trip to China, and he sought company. The idea of being alone with him at his place was intimidating, so she was relieved to find that he had also invited another friend to join them.

“Ugh, thank goodness you're here,” Renjun sighed in relief as he opened the door for her. “Haechan and I were arguing over which movie to watch.”

Trying to stifle a smile, she rolled her eyes as she closed her umbrella and removed her wet shoes. She often found it amusing how Renjun and Haechan could switch from arguing to being the best of friends in the blink of an eye.

“(Y/n), back me up here!” Haechan implored when he saw her enter the room. “On a rainy day like this, we have to watch a horror movie.”

She had known Lee Haechan since kindergarten, and even then, he was quite popular among the kids due to his outgoing personality. However, she hadn't interacted much with him until Renjun befriended her. Haechan started tagging along when they hung out, not wanting to be left out.

Despite Haechan's love for provoking Renjun, he was much kinder to her. He would often try to get her to defend him when he got Renjun angry. Naturally, the three of them ended up spending more time together than with their regular friend group.

“It's my house!” Renjun complained. “And I don't want to watch a horror movie.”

Haechan flashed a teasing glint in his eyes. “Oh. You're probably too scared to watch one.”

“I never said that I was scared,” Renjun turned to her. “Let’s just have (Y/n) choose the movie.”

Her cheeks warmed from the sudden attention. Their arguments typically ended with her being the one to make the final decision. So, she suggested a compromise: they could watch one horror movie and one of Renjun's choices. The boys looked at each other and had a moment of realization.

She had to admit it was quite amusing to watch Renjun and Haechan scream at the scary parts and laugh in embarrassment during the second movie. The two of them got into a spat when Haechan spilled popcorn on Renjun, leading to more bickering that she had to mediate. Sometimes she wondered if they were really in high school.

By the time they finished both movies, they noticed the storm hadn't shown any signs of letting up. Renjun suggested that they sleep over for the night, deeming it too risky to venture out in the rain.

Haechan eventually dozed off, leaving Renjun and her as the only ones still awake. They sat on the floor in front of the sofa, contemplating what to do. After a few awkward silences, Renjun cleared his throat.

“Do you want to see some of my old pictures?” she nodded eagerly in response.

He got up and retrieved a light brown photo album, which took her by surprise as she hadn't expected him to have so many pictures. They sat closer together, and he began to show her the photos.

“These are my parents,” Renjun gestured to the image in the top left corner. “And that's my grandfather over there.”

She beamed when she noticed a school photo of a younger Renjun on the next page. Glancing up at him, she commented, “I didn't know you had a snaggletooth.”

“Oh, yeah, I did,” Renjun shyly rubbed the back of his neck.

He pointed to his current smile, showing her his perfectly straight teeth. “But I have lingual braces now, so it's not there anymore.”

“But why? You looked so cute!" she said, saving herself from admitting she found him cute no matter what.

He sighed, “Only you would say that. If Haechan saw this, I wouldn't hear the end of it.”

They continued to browse through the photos, and she paused at one page, her thumb resting on a polaroid at the bottom right. A younger Renjun sat on a bench, with a girl beside him.

"Who is this?" she asked in a softer tone, without realizing it.

Renjun gazed at the photograph with a hint of hesitation. Without uttering a word, she could tell that a whirlwind of emotions and memories had unintentionally resurfaced.

“She was my first love back in my hometown,” Renjun sighed. “Our parents were good friends, so we knew each other from a young age.”

“We only dated for a year. But back then, I used to think nothing could ever separate us.” He wore a nostalgic smile that quickly faded. Evidently, his youthful hopes hadn't materialized as he had wished.

“If you don’t mind me asking, what happened?” she asked cautiously. Renjun paused and briefly looked at her.

“My dad got a new job here in Seoul, so we moved in the middle of tenth grade,” he explained. “I promised her... I promised her that we could still be together, that we could make it work.”

She could see the regret and sorrow pooling in his eyes. “But the last time we talked, she told me she couldn't handle a long-distance relationship. So she broke up with me.”

That final sentence felt both empty and painful. She couldn't fathom how much he must have suffered. Neither of them spoke for a while, until she mustered the courage to ask how he coped with it all.

“To be honest, it was tough in the beginning,” Renjun admitted. “But recently, I haven't been thinking about her as much.”

She shouldn't have allowed herself to feel hope upon hearing those words. “Have you moved on since then?”

“It still hurts from time to time,” he spoke honestly. “I cared about her a lot.”

“That's understandable,” she whispered. “Do you think you'll ever get over her?”

She tried to read his eyes when he looked back at her, but it was impossible. Instead, he shrugged. “I want to, but I'm not sure if I can.”

From that moment on, she should have given up, knowing that she never had a chance to begin with.

Maybe then, she could have prevented all the heartbreak she had set herself up for.

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She remembered that one morning when she was getting ready for school. As she went to leave her things near the door, she heard her mother's footsteps emerging from the kitchen. Her mother's hair was disheveled, and she had gained weight from all the delivery food she had been eating. She couldn't remember the last time her mother had cooked.

“(Y/n),” her mother reached for her, but she instinctively backed away. The desperation on her mother's face quickly shifted to irritation.

“I'm your mother, I gave birth to you. Is this how you treat me?”

“Eomma—”

But her mother continued, “How awful it is that you've turned out to be just like your abusive father. I can't believe he's brainwashed you.”

Anyone else listening might have thought she was a madwoman. Her mother had become a stranger to her.

“Appa has not abused you. No one is abusing you,” she tried to maintain her patience. “Eomma, you need help. You're not—”

“SHUT UP!” Her mother screamed, causing her to flinch. “You don't know what you're talking about. How dare you disrespect me?”

The heat of anger flushed her face. She yearned to scream back at her mother and tell her to stop, but she knew it would only add fuel to the fire. It wasn't worth it.

Before her mother walked away, she said something that she had been hearing frequently lately. “You know what? Sometimes I wish I wasn't your mother.”

Her fingers curled into fists. Her mom was always adept at being manipulative. As a teenager, she did her best to take her mother's insults maturely. But when someone you love hurls those words at you every day, it slowly chips away at you.

All she could see was red after that argument. She remembered searching for her razor blade and making multiple slashes across her arm when she found it. She didn't care about the stinging pain of the cuts or the fresh, warm blood trickling down her arm. Her thoughts were clouded with fury. She was furious at her mother for behaving like a child and at her father for allowing it to happen. She was furious at herself for not being able to do anything. Every night, she was kept awake by her mother's shouting, harassing her father for no apparent reason.

Trembling with anger, she walked to school. All the pent-up pain and bitterness were bubbling to the surface. She had tried so hard to be strong for her father and everyone else, believing she could handle everything on her own.

By the time she arrived at class that day, she could barely hold herself together. She kept her head down to conceal the evidence of her tears. She took her seat at her desk and tried to regain her composure, determined not to let anyone see the real her, the one filled with bitterness and misery.

“Morning, (Y/n),” she heard his voice calling out to her. Renjun's desk was near the front, by the window, while hers was closer to the back. However, every morning, he would come over to discuss after-school plans or homework.

She hastily wiped away any tears and looked up, forcing a smile to hide her inner turmoil. By eleventh grade, they had become closer since the previous school year. She should have known that Renjun would see right through her. It took just one look for him to sense that something was amiss.

“Something's up. What's wrong?”

Renjun glanced down at her wrist, and she almost gasped when she noticed blood seeping through her uniform sleeve. Blinded by rage, she must have unintentionally cut herself deeper this time.

“(Y/n), what—” He reached for her arm before she could stop him. He paused before gently pulling up her sleeve, revealing the fresh cuts from that morning.

Renjun opened his mouth to say something but remembered they were in a classroom setting. He looked back at her, seeing that all color had drained from her face and her lip began to quiver.

“Come on,” he prompted her, leading her out of the classroom. 

“Renjun, where are you taking me?”

“To the nurse's office. Now.”

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She remembered him pulling her into the nurse's office. Despite her protests and attempts to stop walking, he paid no attention and continued. When they arrived, Renjun had her sit down on one of the treatment beds while he retrieved the first aid kit.

As he lifted the rest of her sleeve, she found herself holding her breath. She said nothing as Renjun cleaned and bandaged her wounds, her gaze dropping to her arm. What was once fair in color and smooth was now marred by hideous scars. Most of them were faded white, while some were still pink. The new red marks stood out the most.

Numerous times, Renjun tried to catch her gaze. She could tell he wanted to know what she was thinking. After applying the last bandage and closing the first aid kit, she forced herself to meet his woeful eyes.

“(Y/n)...” He began, uncertainty in his voice. “Whatever you're going through that makes you hurt yourself like this, you can tell me.”

They locked eyes for a brief moment, and she knew she was about to share everything she had been holding back. She loathed showing vulnerability in front of those she cared about. It filled her with a strong sense of self-hatred.

“I... I can't,” she practically whispered.

Renjun was stubborn and wouldn't give up. He placed his hand on hers, gently squeezing it. “You can trust me, I promise.”

She stared at him for a moment before her facade, maintained for months, crumbled. Slowly, she began to confide in Renjun. She told him about her mother's drug problem and how it had nearly bankrupted their family. She spoke of the sleepless nights listening to her mother hurl insults at her father. It was the first time she had shared the news of her parents’ decision to end their disastrous marriage. Finally, she told him about the argument with her mother that morning and the hurtful things her mother had said to her. 

“How could a mother say those things to her daughter?” Her voice wavered as she continued, “When I've spent my whole life trying to...hoping for her to love me.”

She waited for Renjun to say something. But he caught her off guard when he reached over and enveloped her in a tight hug. He patted her back gently and assured her that she had every right to be upset.

“Your mom must be crazy not to see how amazing you are,” he said, using his thumb to wipe away her tears. “I'm sorry she said those things to you. You didn't deserve that.”

She sniffed and shook her head. “I don't know why there's still some part of me that expects something from her.”

"It's because you love her and want her to be healthy," Renjun responded.

She lowered her head and admitted, "I guess you're right..."

There was a brief silence between them. Renjun frowned, glancing around the room before standing up. He looked down at her with a mischievous smile.

“Let's get out of here,” he suggested, nodding toward the door.

Her torn expression shifted to a confused one. “Right now? But we have class.”

“That’s fine. We’ll just say you felt sick, and I offered to take you home.”

“So you’re suggesting we skip school?”

“I mean yeah, why not?” Renjun shrugged. “It’s not like they’re going to suspect anything bad from top students like us.”

Her eyebrows lifted in uncertainty. She never thought she would ever hear Huang Renjun suggesting skipping class. She had never in her life done such a thing.

Tired of waiting, he took her hand and pulled her up. “You should go have fun on a day like this. To clear your mind.”

She could feel her heart beating faster when he held her hand. Slightly flustered by the situation, she just nodded and followed him to sneak out of the school grounds. They got on a bus and sat in the back rows. She didn’t bother asking Renjun where they were going. Her mind was still stuck on the fact that she had practically spilled her heart out to the boy next to her. She regretted telling him so much in her emotional state. But he didn’t appear to think any less of her.

Renjun ended up taking her to a small arcade filled with game machines, prizes, and neon lights. “Haechan talks about this place a lot. It’s my first time here, though.”

She chuckled, “He’s going to kill you when he finds out you came here without him.”

“I know,” Renjun said and took her hand again. “Come on, let’s go buy some tokens.”

They played all sorts of games that day, such as racing and shooting ones. She thought she would be bad at the basketball game, but it turned out Renjun was worse than her. She laughed when he got pouty for not being able to score many baskets.

“Oh, over there!” She pointed out. “I’ve always wanted to go to a photobooth with friends.”

Renjun smiled at her sudden excitement. “Let’s go do it, then.”

The two of them went in and paid the machine to take some pictures. In a hurry before the camera started rolling, they picked out accessories for each other. She hoped Renjun didn’t notice the shade of pink on her cheeks as he set a white headband with cat ears on her head. On the other hand, she chose a pair of large daisy-themed sunglasses for him.

Renjun convinced her to try doing different poses. By the time the camera clicked for the last time, both of them were caught up in laughter. To her surprise, the photos came out well. In the last one, she saw Renjun smiling down at her, and she had her hands shaped as a heart. Anyone would have mistaken them for a couple.

She thought they would be done once they were finished with the arcade. But by the time they left, it was late afternoon. She hadn’t even realized the time went by. By then, the school day was already over. She said that they should just go back home now. Renjun looked at her with a slightly worried expression.

“Why don’t we get some ice cream first?” He pointed toward the frozen treat shop across the street. Reluctantly, she agreed and let him lead them to the place.

After getting their ice cream, they sat at one of the two-person tables outside. Subconsciously, she quietly observed him as he ate his green tea flavored ice cream. Why was her heart continuing to beat faster whenever she was around him?

“You should eat yours before it melts,” Renjun pointed out.

She was snapped out of her thoughts and glanced down at the mint-chocolate ice cream cone in her hand. Laughing nervously, she quickly took a small bite. “Oh right.”

Renjun chuckled and picked up the napkin near him. “You have some on your lips.”

Absent-mindedly, he reached over the table to wipe off the remaining cream off her mouth. Her eyes widened when she noticed how close their faces were. When Renjun saw the blush on her face, he coughed and sat back down in his seat.

Once the heat in her cheeks lessened, she took the chance to speak again. “I didn’t get the chance to thank you for today. I’m…I’m sorry about this morning.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” Renjun shook his head. “I just—if you ever feel like hurting yourself again…”

He made eye contact with her when he said this, “Come to me, okay? Don’t feel like you have to carry all the burdens on your own.”

When she didn’t say anything, he placed a hand on top of hers. It was the third time he did that today. “I’ll always be here for you, (Y/n)-yah.”

How she wished that she hadn’t taken those words to heart.

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She remembered Haechan narrowing his eyes at her as they waited for Renjun at the library. He seemed as if he was suspecting her of something. She hoped Renjun would come soon to break this weird tension.

“How long are you going to stare at me like that?” She glanced up from her schoolwork.

Ignoring her question, Haechan said, “You and Renjun have been acting strange around each other.”

She laughed incredulously. “What are you talking about?”

“The way you two look at each other is different.” Haechan twirled the pencil in his hands with his fingers. “And you’ve been hanging out a lot. Without me.”

“Haechan, we’re just friends-”

“You like him, don’t you?” Instantly, she froze when he asked. The corner of Haechan’s lips curled upward into a smile.

“I’ll take your silence as a confirmation.”

“How…how did you find out?”

Haechan rolled his eyes as if the answer was obvious. “I’ve known you since kindergarten, Kim (Y/n). Never have I seen you look at a boy before Renjunie.”

It was true. She had no interest in boys unlike the other girls in her class at the time. She was always preoccupied with what was going on at home. Not just with boys, she had never made an effort to make many friends. Her mindset at the time was it was better to be alone, so no one could hurt her. Then Huang Renjun came along and changed everything.

She briefly scanned the library to ensure no one was paying them any mind, before leaning closer to the table. But that didn’t stop her from speaking in a hushed tone.

“You can’t tell him, okay?” 

Haechan looked at her quizzically. “You’re not going to confess to him?”

“Why would I? That would be too risky.”

“What’s there to risk?” Her friend tilted his head. “You’re single, he’s single. You like him, and he probably likes you back.”

Shaking her head, “There’s no way he likes me back. I think he’s still stuck on his past relationship.”

“His first love back in China?” Haechan scoffed. “(Y/n), that was so long ago. And you’re here, right in front of him. I think you have a solid chance.”

“It’s not that easy, Haechan. Our whole friendship could be ruined, and I don’t want that to happen.”

The boy frowned at her. “So what? You’re just going to do nothing and watch him go find someone else?”

“Hey, guys! Sorry, I’m late.” A male voice ended their conversation. They looked to see Renjun waving to them and coming to their table.

“What were you guys talking about?” he asked when he sat down.

Before Haechan could answer, she spoke up before him. “We were just talking about the math test tomorrow.”

“Oh right. Let me get out my textbook so we can study.” Renjun reached down for his bag. While doing so, Haechan narrowed his eyes on her again.

He did have a point. She certainly didn’t want to see the boy she liked with someone else. But she was too much of a coward at the time. Confessing to Renjun sounded terrifying just thinking about it. She could never bring herself to do it.

Back then, she should’ve listened to her instincts.

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She remembered frowning at the empty desk in the corner of the room when she entered that morning. For once, there was no Renjun to greet her with his cute smile and wave. That was odd, she thought to herself. He was always in the classroom before her.

When she made her way to her seat, Haechan sat at the desk in front of her. His chin rested in one of his hands as he sulked.

“Our Renjunie is at home with a cold. That’s why he couldn’t come to school today.”

“He caught a cold?” He rarely got sick. But Haechan nodded in confirmation.

“Remember the other day when he forgot to bring an umbrella when it was raining?”

“Oh goodness,” she sighed, worry swirled around her head. “Maybe we should go visit him after school.”

Haechan smiled teasingly and shook his head. “Nah, I don’t want to get in the way of your lovey-dovey moments with him.”

“Lee Haechan!” She lightly pushed his shoulder as he laughed.

“You know, it’s really easy to make you blush? I can only imagine what happens when Renjunie is around.” 

She swore, the boy was purposely pushing all her buttons.

Regardless of Haechan’s teasing, she still went to Renjun’s house after school. She had asked the light-haired boy one more time if he wanted to join her. But he said that he had something else to do. Whatever that was.

Anxiously, she made her way up the front steps of his house with a bag in her hand. The school day was killing her, knowing that Renjun was sick and home alone. She had never so badly for classes to be over.

His mom was there to open the door for her. Even though they had been friends for more than a year, it was her first time meeting Renjun’s mother. Immediately she recognized their similar facial features. “Hello, how can I help you?”

Almost forgetting her words, she straightened up her posture and bowed. “I’m so sorry to bother you. But is Renjun home?”

The woman’s face brightened when she said her son’s name. Clasping her hands together, she smiled at her. “You must be that girl he talks about all the time. It’s so nice to finally meet you!”

Her eyes widened when she heard this. Renjun talked about her? To his parents? Before she could muster up a good response, Mrs. Huang was already ushering her inside the house.

“I’m so glad you came,” She said. “My poor son is sick in bed. But I got called into work right now and his father already left in the morning.”

She slipped off her shoes and gave his mother what she hoped to be a reassuring smile. “You don’t have to worry Mrs. Huang. I came to make sure he was okay, so I can help watch over him for you.”

“Oh, that’s so kind of you. Thank you so much,” She squeezed her hands and tried to get a better look at her. “Truly, I’m grateful that Renjun has a friend like you. He was so sad when we first moved here. But now he’s so much happier.”

She recalled the few times when Renjun told her he felt homesick. In the beginning, he told her a lot about his hometown and his childhood there. She couldn’t imagine what it was like to move to a completely different country.

“It’s nothing, really,” She told his mother. “Your son is a great friend of mine. He…he means a lot to me.”

After hearing his mom’s words, she remembered wanting nothing more than to stay by Renjun’s side. She wanted to be there for him, just like he was to her. Even if he never knew about her feelings, she was okay with that.

Ms. Huang thanked her again before she hurriedly left for work. She told her that he was still in bed and his bedroom was on the left side down the hall.

“Renjun?” She knocked before coming into the room. The walls were painted a pale yellow, and there was a window above his desk. His room was neat and simple, like hers.

Renjun lifted his head to see that she had called his name. “(Y/n), what are you doing here?”

She grimaced when she heard him cough. “Your mom just left. I came to drop off your homework and look after you for a bit.”

“Oh…but what if you get sick?” 

She smiled at his show of concern. “I should be fine. I have a strong immune system,” she insisted.

He didn’t seem to be very convinced. But he reluctantly laid back on his pillow. She set her school bag down on his desk chair.

“There are some things I have to prepare,” She said, going toward the door. “Just rest here, and I’ll be back in a bit okay?”

Renjun was too tired to protest, so he patiently waited for her to come back. It wasn’t like there was anything else he could do.

Moments later, she returned with a tray that carried a steaming hot bowl of porridge and a cup of tea. The sick boy peered up with a curious look in his eyes.

“This is some congee I made. It’s good to eat warm things when you have a cold,” she explained as she carefully placed the tray on his nightstand. Leaving the drink, she picked up the bowl to give to him.

Renjun smiled, but there was slight guilt in his eyes. “You didn’t have to do that for me.”

“It’s no big deal,” she said. “I made it the other day when my dad got sick. So I just reheated the leftovers that I had.”

“But still…”

Ignoring his nasally mumbles, she took the spoon and firmly put it in his hands. “You need to eat to get your strength back.”

He accepted the utensil sulkily and weakly took a bite of the food she made. She watched quietly as he ate. His face was paler than usual, and his dark hair was damp from his sickness. She hadn’t imagined a sick Renjun would be so cute. But somehow, she was surprised either way.

She stayed with Renjun the rest of the evening. After helping him take some cold medicine, they moved to the living room and watched some k-dramas on her laptop. Some laughter was exchanged at the funny parts. Occasionally, she heard sniffles at the sadder scenes in the movie. She wasn’t sure if it was Renjun’s symptoms or if he was actually crying. Either way, she pretended she didn’t hear him.

“Gosh, you're burning up,” she said when she placed a hand on his forehead to check his temperature.

She stood up to get a cold wet towel to help him cool down. Sitting back down at the foot of his bed, she leaned over to gently dab the cloth onto his forehead. She could sense Renjun switching from staring at her to glancing over her shoulder. But she pretended not to notice. After a few minutes, she brought her hand down and asked if he felt any better. But he wouldn’t answer.

“Renjun?” He looked back at her and gestured for her hand. He took it and placed her hand over his chest.

“Why do you keep making me feel like this, (Y/n)?” 

His words meshed into the other. But she was still able to understand what he was saying. She stared at him in surprise, unable to find an appropriate response.

Renjun pressed his other hand over his eyes in distress. “All I’ve been thinking about lately is you. I swear it’s driving me crazy.”

From hearing this, she was certain that this was just the fever talking. She didn’t want to give herself false hope.

“Renjun, you…should rest. I don’t think you know what you’re saying.” She tried to pry her hand out of his.

Instead of letting her go, she felt his grip tighten around her wrist. Before she could say anything, her body was pulled down into a position where Renjun was right beneath her. She wasn’t sure if the sudden heat she felt came from Renjun’s fever or from how flustered she was at the moment.

“Huang Renjun, what are you—” She tried to escape, but he held her in place. He brought her closer to where their faces were merely inches apart. His steady eyes marveled over her red cheeks and eventually moved down to her lips.

But before she could make another attempt to move off of him, he pulled her down so their lips could meet.

Her eyes were wide open when she processed what was happening. He had single-handedly taken her first kiss, and she wasn’t sure how to take it at the time.

Little passion was felt in the kiss. But there was so much yearning and desire. When she let go of any resistance and closed her eyes, she felt herself melting into his touch. This… is something that she wasn’t aware she had wanted. I mean, what girl wouldn’t want to be kissed by the boy she liked?

Before the things could go any further, Renjun released his hands off her neck and fell back. He had dozed off in the next second, leaving her to be baffled by the situation.

She couldn’t recall what happened after. All she could remember was waking up the next morning on Renjun’s couch with a dark blue blanket covering her. Slowly, she sat up and saw Renjun exiting a room.

“Oh, you’re awake!” He looked slightly better than he did the other day, but still a little pale. Self-consciously, she straightened her clothes and patted down her hair as he came to sit beside her.

“Wha-what time is it?” She sat up and reached for her phone to look at the clock. 10:15 am.

Renjun chuckled, “It’s a good thing it’s Saturday.”

Warily, she placed her phone back down on the table in front of them. She looked at the boy beside her for a moment, wondering how to bring up the events that occurred the night before. She must’ve fallen asleep late, overthinking everything. If Renjun kissed her, that had to mean he felt something for her, right? Or were his actions from him being delirious?

“Renjun, about yesterday…” She started.

His eyes lit up, “Oh right. I can’t thank you enough for staying and taking care of me. My mom told me to say thank you to her. She and my dad have already left for work.”

“Oh…it was nothing,” she shook her head. “But I’m talking about when you-”

Renjun leaned back on the couch and sighed, “Ugh I hadn’t been that sick in a long time. Honestly, some of the things from yesterday are hazy to me.”

Her eyes blinked in confusion. “Do…do you not remember what happened last night then?”

The boy furrowed his brows as he tried to think back. Seconds later he snapped his fingers. “Oh yeah. The ice towel you used really helped to bring my fever down. I wanted to thank you for that too.”

So he didn’t remember kissing her. Any hopes she had of Renjun might share the same feelings as she dissolved in an instant. Those optimistic feelings were replaced by perplexity and dismay.

Stupid, foolish girl. She was such an idiot to have such thoughts to begin with.

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She remembered the astounded look on Haechan’s face when she glumly told him about what happened. They had met up at a café later that afternoon. 

“He what?!” The boy across from her nearly jumped out of his chair.

She shot him a nervous glare, “Haechan! Can you please just sit back down?”

“Sorry, let me get this straight.” He thankfully did as she asked. “You were taking care of Renjun, and he kissed you. But he doesn’t remember it?”

She dropped her head and nodded gloomily. “What am I supposed to do now?”

“Are you sure he forgot?” Haechan asked.

“I don’t know. If he didn’t, he obviously wants to pretend it never happened,” she said, poking at the straw in her drink. Hearing herself say that only left her feeling more depressed.

Haechan sighed and gave her a look of slight concern. “(Y/n), I really think you should just tell Renjun about your feelings.”

“Haechan…”

“I’m being serious! At this point, you should just go for it,” he sat up in his seat. “What could possibly go wrong other than him saying no?”

She had sworn to herself that she would never confess to Renjun. Even if there was a small chance he might like her in return, she was too scared to risk it. He meant too much to her to lose him because of her selfishness.

“If Renjun rejects me, he’ll feel bad and have a hard time.” Her shoulders faltered. “I don’t want to make him feel uncomfortable because of me.”

Haechan crossed his arms, “But that might never happen. Coming from experience, it’s better to just confess your feelings and be done with it. Things might not go the way you want. But you’ll feel better after.”

“Maybe you’re right,” she fumbled with the paper wrapping from her straw.

Haechan smirked, “Of course, I am. I’m always right.”

“Yeah, and what experience do you have?” She questioned, referring to his prior words. In response, he put a finger to his mouth as a motion for her not to comment further.

“Just trust me, okay?”

She dwelled on what Haechan said for a bit. Honestly, she wasn’t sure how much longer she could go being around Renjun without her heart exploding. Especially after they kissed. How long was she going to let herself live like this?

So for once and all, she followed Haechan’s advice and chose one day to confess. 

She had to show that she wasn’t a coward and be a little braver for once. It was the most determined she had ever been about something. She was finally going to confront her feelings.

At least she thought she was.

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She remembered it was the beginning of autumn when she asked Renjun to meet her at the park one day. Aside from that, she had been trying to get out of the house more often. Things with her parents were still rocky. Being at school and spending time with friends allowed her to stop thinking about it all for a little while.

But that day was different. When she had finally decided to face her fears and just tell Renjun how she felt. She was beyond nervous, unable to keep her legs from shaking as she waited for him to arrive. She had repeated everything she was going to say numerous times the night before. 

Having never confessed to a boy before, she spent the past few nights searching for tips on what she should do. There was one site that said you should dress up for these occasions. So foolishly, she spent almost an hour picking the right outfit and makeup. She hoped Renjun wouldn’t find her being too obvious.

Before she could chicken out, she saw him walking down the street to see her. He was wearing a smile. She didn’t think about it then. But his smile wasn’t bright like the normal ones he showed her. This one was filled with slight apprehension.

“Hey (Y/n),” He came to her with hands in the pockets of his jacket. “What did you want to do today?”

There was no way for her to back out anymore. “Actually Renjun, there’s something I want to tell you.”

“Oh really? I have something to tell you too,” Renjun scratched the back of his head. She was curious as to what he had to say. For a second she forgot about her plan.

They stared at each other awkwardly until Renjun cleared his throat. “You—you can go first if you want.”

“Oh okay.” Tensely, her grip on the strap of her purse tightened. She told herself that she could do this. It was Renjun, after all. Why did she make this so hard for herself?

Taking a deep breath, she forced herself to meet his eyes. “You see, there’s something I’ve been hiding from you.”

Renjun looked at her with slight concern, “Hiding from me? (Y/n), you know you can tell me anything, right?”

“I know, I know. That’s why I’m telling you today because I don’t think I can keep it in anymore,” She said. Here goes nothing, she remembered thinking to herself.

“Renjun, I like—”

“Huang Renjun!” She was stopped by an unfamiliar female voice from behind her. As she started to process her failed attempt to confess, she watched a look of astonishment appear on Renjun’s face. 

She turned to see a girl about their age with short light-brown hair, wearing a yellow sweater over a white skirt. She ran over to embrace the boy in front of her.

For a moment, Renjun seemed to be at a loss for words. Then he slowly hugged her back and a name rolled off his tongue. “Xiaomi?”

She held him closer to her. “Oh, I’ve missed you so much.”

“I—I don’t understand. What are you doing here?” He pulled away. Surprise and bewilderment were still evident in his expression.

Every ounce of glee was pouring from her eyes. “I couldn’t stand us being so far apart. It took me a while, but I convinced my parents to move us here.”

“But…but how?”

“Your father talked with mine and helped him secure a job at the same company,” She replied. “I’ll be going to the same school as you too!”

(Y/n) stood there like a fool. They were speaking in Chinese. But it didn’t take an idiot to understand the situation. She was his first love. The one he told her about. She was here, she had come for him. And (Y/n) was just…there.

Renjun didn’t respond and glanced back at her. Finally, the girl turned to look at her. It turned out that she also knew how to speak Korean. But hers wasn’t nearly as good as Renjun’s.

“Is this a friend of yours?”

Suddenly snapping out of his daze, “Y-yeah. This is Kim (Y/n). (Y/n), this is Xu Xiaomi.”

Swallowing this whole new feeling of heartbreak, (Y/n) forced a smile on her face. “Renjun told me about you.”

Xiaomi beamed, “He did? How sweet.”

She looked back at Renjun and clasped her hands together. “Isn’t this great, Renjun? We can finally be together now!” 

“I think I’ll get going now,” She bowed her head. She didn’t think she could stand to watch any longer. 

Renjun called out to her but she pretended not to hear him. She woke up that day, barely ready for rejection. So many scenarios she had gone through and prepared what to say. But she didn’t expect that to happen. 

Yet, she had no idea that there would be more pain to come.

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She remembered Xiaomi being introduced to their homeroom the next Monday. She kept exchanging glances with Renjun throughout the class. She could hear Haechan, who was a few seats behind her, making gagging noises at the couple.

She hadn’t spoken much to Renjun since that day at the park. She wasn’t sure which was worse, losing the one chance she had to confess to her crush or witnessing him be reunited with his past lover.

“Are you going to eat your tonkatsu?” Haechan pointed his chopsticks to her lunch, snapping her out of her brief daze. 

He was trying to act like everything was normal. But she could tell he was holding back what he truly wanted to say. Although Renjun or Xiaomi wouldn’t have heard him anyway, since they hadn’t arrived at the cafeteria yet.

When he asked, she pushed her tray toward the boy. “Have it all.”

Her appetite had been lost over the past few days. Not only because of Renjun, she just had this mild pain in her head. Maybe her body was finally breaking from all the emotions she had been trying to hide.

Before Haechan could question her, she stood up from her seat. “I’m going to go back to the classroom for a bit. There’s an assignment I want to get ahead on.”

When she approached their classroom, she saw Renjun and Xiaomi through the window. She was near the door, but they couldn’t see her. She didn’t know why she was inclined to stay. She wasn’t there at the beginning of the conversation. But she had heard the rest of it.

“Tell me the truth, Renjun. Who is Kim (Y/n) to you?” Xiaomi asked. She was no longer smiling brightly.

Immediately (Y/n) was alerted when she heard her name. When did she become the subject?

“Xiaomi…”

She frowned at him in dissatisfaction. “I saw the way you looked at her. Do you not love me anymore?”

“What? No!” Renjun denied. He quickly grabbed Xiaomi’s hands and held them.

She wasn’t prepared to hear what he said next. “Honestly, (Y/n) is just a friend of another friend I made here, and we’ve hung out a few times. She…she means nothing to me.”

“Are you sure?” 

He gently lifted her chin and kissed her reassuringly before murmuring. “Yes.”

(Y/n)'s hand reached to cover her mouth, as she started to back away. A sob climbed up her throat. But she was already running before they could hear her. She couldn’t stop thinking about how naive she had been. How stupid she was.

To ever think for even a moment, that she would ever mean something to someone.

┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦

She remembered her dad mentioning that he wanted to move back to Busan. After she had been born out of wedlock, he moved from his hometown to be with her mother in Seoul. Now that the divorce was almost finalized, there was nothing here for him anymore.

At first, she was against the idea. She didn't want to leave her friends and school. But as she thought about it more, she started to think that maybe it was for the best. She didn't think she could ever look at Renjun the same again. Not after he said those things. Yet there was this part of her that still harbored feelings for him. It left her more devastated than anything. Was she really nothing to him?

She was so sick of it all. But before she could leave everything behind, there was something she wanted to do first.

↣ ↢

Haechan was the only person she told that she was moving. She asked him not to tell any of their other friends, especially Renjun.

Surprisingly, Haechan was a lot more understanding than she expected. But he didn't hold back his anger when she told him about what she had heard the other day.

“Damn. That son of a-”

She nearly hit him for swearing. “Lee Haechan! He's still your best friend.”

“I don't care if he is!” Haechan saw the distress in her eyes and sighed. “Okay, I'm sorry. But I still think he was an a**hole to say those things.”

Hating to admit, she kind of had to agree with him. Maybe Renjun wasn't the person she thought he was.

“Thank you, for being there when I needed it,” she said, avoiding eye contact.

The boy waved his hand dismissively, “You're lucky to have such a smart and loyal friend like me.”

Of course, he still maintained that ego of his. But then Haechan placed a hand on her shoulder and gave her a sincere look.

“Hang in there, kid,” He said with a proud smile on his face. “I'm sure things will get better for you.”

“We're the same age, Haechan.”

“Shush, don't ruin the moment.”

She shook her head and laughed. Despite everything, it was still nice to know that there was still one person by her side. The past version of her would have never even imagined being friends with someone like Haechan.

But on multiple levels, life had done its best to prove her wrong.

┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦

At the end of the month, their homeroom teacher had an announcement for the class in the morning. But all Renjun could think about was the empty desk in the back center of the room. (Y/n) hadn't been at school this past week. Multiple attempts he had made to call and text her. But there was no response. It was almost as if she had disappeared all of a sudden.

“I know some of you may be wondering about your classmate that has been missing,” the teacher looked around the students. “I came to tell you that Kim Y/n is no longer a student at this school and has moved away.”

The sound of gasps and murmurs erupted among the class. Renjun shook his head, unable to believe the news. No, it couldn’t be true. Why would she leave without saying anything?

“Where did she move to?” One person asked. Renjun looked at his teacher with hope in his eyes.

But the man shook his head and stepped away from the podium. “I can't disclose that information, for her privacy's sake. That's all I have for today. Get ready for your English class.”

When the teacher left, Renjun turned to find Haechan. He didn't seem the slightest bit surprised by this news. He had to know something.

“Where is (Y/n)?” His friend only responded with a glare.

“Lee Haechan!” Renjun's fingers curled into fists, quick to resort to anger.

Haechan shook his head and brought a light purple envelope from his bag. Without looking at him, he gestured for Renjun to take it. “She asked me to give you this.”

He hesitated before adding, “She should be at the train station. But she doesn't leave until half an hour from now. That's all I'm telling you.”

The envelope crinkled in Renjun's hands. He heard Xiaomi call his name. But he was already out the door, running out of school and catching a taxi. He had to find Y/n. He didn't care about the consequences.

Nothing else was on his mind except for her.

┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦

Dear Renjun,

A part of me hopes you will never read this. But if you are, that must mean things didn’t work out the way I had planned. And the purpose of this letter has changed from what it was originally supposed to be.

I know in our day and age that letters are old-fashioned. But I still loved the idea of them. I am writing you this letter because I am not brave enough to face you in person. I haven’t been truthful to you about some things. So here I want to clarify them. I hope you don’t mind.

I don’t remember how it exactly happened. But I’ve liked you for some time now. I think it was that day when I saw you helping that lady cross the street. I guess I’m someone who is easily swayed by kindness.

However, I didn’t realize my feelings until the day you learned about my secrets. That was when I knew I couldn’t keep myself from falling anymore. When we used to study together and hang out in the summer, I was the happiest I had ever been. I should thank you for that.

You had gotten out of a serious relationship and I wasn’t looking to date. I thought I was content with just being friends.

Then on the day you were sick, we kissed. Maybe you didn’t remember. Or maybe you didn’t want to. It was probably some mistake to you. Yet for a second, I thought there was a chance you liked me too. But I was very wrong about that, wasn’t I?

I know I mean nothing to you. But to me, you meant everything. You were the first person who knew my secret and comforted me. You made me feel like I didn’t have to hurt alone anymore.

I may not be your first love, Renjun, But you were mine. And I want nothing more than happiness and success in your future. Seriously, do something that makes you happy. Not because of any standards that are put on us, or the pressure that you give yourself. I hope that you can find your dream again and to someday see you shine brighter than anyone else.

Obviously, you don’t have to listen to me. But these were the things I wanted to say to you without any more regrets.

Sincerely, Kim (Y/n)

The letter crumpled in Renjun’s shaky hands. He looked at the taxi driver with desperation. “Ahjeossi, please hurry!” He anxiously sat back in his seat.

So she did hear what he said that day. Why, why did he lie? Why had he been so foolish?

When he finally got to the train station, Renjun sprinted inside only to be crowded by the other people passing by. He tried his best to get through briskly.

“(Y/n)!” He called out as if he was insane. “Kim (Y/n)!”

He could care less about the people who gave him odd stares. His mind was focused on getting to her. He ran to find the public transport timetable. His eyes darted across the board and found the departures.

10:44 BUSAN KTX DELAY: 0 min

He was too late. She was gone, leaving him in his regrets and despair. The boy fell to his knees as tears streamed down his face.

“Please…please come back, (Y/n),” Renjun cried, “Don’t go, I’m sorry. This is all my fault.”

He knew that she couldn’t hear him. Every word that came out of his mouth was futile. She could not see him right now. But if she did, she would’ve run back to embrace him and tell him not to cry.

All he could do was bang his fists on the ground, pathetically. “(Y/n), I’m sorry. Please don’t leave me.”

He said this, even though she was never his and he was never hers. This pain was worse than when Xiaomi had broken up with him. He didn’t think he would ever be able to move on from it. There were so many words that he wanted to say to her. Words that he should’ve said to her before. Most importantly,

“I love you.”

┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦┈◦•◦⟡•◦

{ five years later }

Here she was again, standing before him after not seeing each other since the eleventh grade. But she wasn’t alone.

“Hey, everyone. It's been a while,” she still seemed shy, but more reassured.

That was when his eyes found the person holding her hand. He was tall, handsome with jet black hair and a face that could charm anyone. If Renjun saw him in any other setting, he would have assumed he was some playboy. But in this case, the guy was looking at Y/n with tenderness in his eyes. Anyone would be able to tell he was completely enamored with her from just one glance.

Coincidentally, she met Renjun's eyes when she introduced the person next to her. “This is Na Jaemin—my boyfriend.”

“Wah, he's so handsome!” Her friends were awed as if he wasn't standing right there.”You found yourself a good one, Y/n!”

All Renjun could do was sit back and listen to the others asking how the two met and how long they'd been dating. He thought he should feel angry or betrayed. But for some reason, he didn't feel those things.

“Renjun, you should sing something for us,” Haechan said later in the night. He gestured to the small stage near the back.

“I don't know, guys…”

“Oh come on,” one classmate begged. “Just one song?”

Eventually, Renjun gave in knowing it was the only way for them to stop asking. In the next few seconds, the singer found himself getting out of his seat and getting up on stage. He adjusted the microphone stand and connected his phone to the speaker.

Tightening his grip as the music started to play, inadvertently they made eye contact again. At just one glance, so many emotions swelled in his heart. Without her, he would've ignored his passion and moved on to live a meaningless life. But thanks to (Y/n), he was able to find his dream again and go after it.

Never would he forget how he hurt her with his foolish words. The song he was about to sing was chosen especially for her.

“Why do I get sulky so easily? Am I this pathetic because of my small heart?” He started to sing, tightly gripping onto the mic stand. “Don’t go, I know I was a bit too much. Can you forgive me for being regretful again?”

As a professional, Renjun did his best to keep his voice stable, but it wasn’t easy. This song was written for her. He didn't know if she had heard it before. But he hoped it could convey the feelings he wasn't able to before.

Kim (Y/n), who he loved. Kim (Y/n), who he had hurt and brought him so much regret.

The same heartache he was feeling earlier returned as he sang the chorus, “Tell me, why I let you down? Any chance I get I'm breaking down.”

“I know it's my fault, but why is it so hard? To tell you that I'm sorry, heart.” His gaze remained fixed on her as the lyrics gracefully flowed from his lips.

There was loud applause when Renjun finished the song. But he couldn't enjoy it. He just wanted to see her reaction. She was smiling at him with tears glistening in her eyes. That was all the approval Renjun needed.

When the event was over, he went outside in hopes to talk to her. His feet stopped moving when he found her standing under a large tree nearby. She was talking to Jaemin, who had his back toward him. She laughed at something he said.

Then a few moments later, the man took a small box out of his jacket pocket. Renjun watched as her eyes lit up in the utmost surprise. Renjun couldn't hear the conversation. But he was there when she mouthed the word “yes” and to see them warmly hug each other after.

Still, in her partner's embrace, she met Renjun's gaze once more. He knew that she was content by the way she smiled at him.

And he couldn't help but smile back. Was he envious? Of course, he was. He would do almost anything to be in that man’s place. However, nothing could be done or changed.

He was happy for her because she was happy. No words could be exchanged. But none needed to be said. Their story had ended a long time ago.

They were living in reality, not some cliché world where everyone got their happy ending. 

Where having a first love didn't necessarily guarantee they would be their last. But that didn't mean finding happiness was not achievable.

𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚༝༚𓆩⟡𓆪

#nct dream x reader #nct dream #nct dream fic #huang renjun #renjun fic #renjun x reader #injunnie #kpop fic #nct #nct fic #high school au #bittersweet #nctzen #czennie #haechan #jaemin #renjun #nct dream angst #kpop #nct high school au

[zoeykallus]

HAPPY BIRTHDAY QUEEN! I know it's your birthday and you will probably not write anything today, but let me suggest something topic related for another time maybe? You said you are having a bad time recently and I thought, why not make a one-shot with your fave clone, some birthday hurt and comfort? Maybe it helps you to feel better about what's going on? Love and best wishes!

Aaawww, Thank you! Oh wow, you are really calling me out right here 😅 But you know what? You might be right about this. Sorry to everyone else who have to wait a bit longer for their requests. Today is my day after all, right? 😅 Okay, here goes nothing...

Thank you for giving me the opportunity to indulge myself 😅

The Bad Batch (Tech) x F!Reader - The Birthday Misery

Stress/Comfort/Generic Happy Ending/Fluff

_________________

The last weeks were exhausting, many things went wrong, things broke that had to be replaced quickly. Everything that can go wrong is going wrong to your left and right. Your salary is practically gone at the beginning of the month. Today is your birthday, and you haven't said anything to anyone, at least not to your new colleagues. Your old ones live way too far away anyway. You can't invite anyone, there's no money. You don't even have a cake or anything decent to eat in the house, no drinks to toast with, not even coffee. With a heavy sigh, you look at the clock and drink the tea you just brewed, because you don't feel like drinking tap water anymore. You hate these months when it feels like you're working for nothing, because you're getting absolutely nothing from the credits you earned, not even on your birthday. You hope Wrecker is kind enough to offer you some of his rations again, what you have in the house has to last at least two more weeks and is actually not even enough for one, if at all. But it's not just the money or the fact that you didn't eat properly in a week, it's the stress that makes you lose sleep, all the things that go sideways, and it feels you are alone with all that's on your mind. Putting on your gear, you make your way to the hangar where the Marauder is. You don't talk to Cid about a raise, that didn't work last time. When you see Tech standing by the ship, you smile, you are always happy to see him. You try to suppress your stomach growl with sheer willpower, you are embarrassed and don't want Tech to hear it. When he looks up and looks at you, you feel warm, but then your stomach growls again, and you fake a cough to drown it out. "Hi Tech." "Hello, dear. Are you not feeling well?" You blink, then realize he's referring to the cough. "No, I'm fine, just a dry throat." You almost jump out of your boots in shock when Hunter suddenly addresses you from the side, you didn't even see him before. "Have you had breakfast?" Several cogs mesh in your head. You know Hunter has very good hearing, and the coughing probably didn't fool him.

„Um, didn't have time, I'm afraid I overslept". Tech frowns and says, "You shouldn't go to work on an empty stomach" "I um-" Before you can reply anything, you hear Cid's voice, "There's the birthday girl." The next moment, her hand falls heavily on your shoulder. You want to sink into the ground, you don't need this attention right now, you can't celebrate either, you don't even have credits for a decent meal. "Birthday?" asks Tech quietly, looking confused. Hunter grins at you and pats you on the shoulder as well. "Happy birthday, ad'ika!" You feel uncomfortable, but force yourself to smile and thank him, before hastily distracting yourself by starting to load the Marauders with the goods that need to be delivered. Tech joins you and lends a hand. More or less casually, he asks, "Are you celebrating your birthday?" This is not a conversation you really wanted to engage in. "Um, no, not this year" "Why not? This would be the first year you've celebrated with us" Evasively, you say, "But I have to work today." "But tonight is your night off" he remarks matter-of-factly. With a sigh, you say, "I'll probably be tired." For a brief moment, Tech thinks and is silent, but then he says, "I'm sure my brothers would love to toast you as much as I would. Isn't that what people do?" His question is innocent and perfectly legitimate, but you feel pressured and retort, "I can't do that" "Why not?"

You set the box you were about to pick up back down with a deep sigh and say, "Please don't tell the others, but I can't even afford the breakfast caf right now. So I can't buy a round on my birthday" Tech blinks again, then reaches into a pocket on his belt. "I could-" "No, Tech, that's sweet of you, but you don't have to" "I know but-" You put your hand on his to stop him from getting credits out of the pocket, gently but firmly. You kiss his cheek and say softly, "That's incredibly sweet of you, but I'd just rather we forget about it, okay?" Tech hesitates, his cheeks blushing a little. You realize you've never been this close to him before. "Well, if that's your wish," he finally says, giving in to you. A little unsure, you say, "Sorry about the kiss, I didn't mean to cross any lines I-" "It's okay, it didn't bother me.... on the contrary" You smile shyly at each other before you both dive back into work to distract yourselves.

You are shaky and tired as you make your way to your apartment in the evening. You're shaky because you're lacking nutrients, you haven't eaten anything all day except for a protein bar, and yet you've been working hard. When the batch had already finished work, you did a few small errands for Cid, today of all days. Outside your apartment, however, you encounter something unexpected. Tech, Hunter, Wrecker, Echo and Crosshair are standing there, each of them having filled bags which contents you can't immediately recognize. "Hey ad'ika!" exclaims Wrecker with a laugh, "You're slow today!" Puzzled, you ask, "What are you all doing here?" "We came to celebrate your birthday," Echo says, holding up one of the bags, "We brought drinks and food. We thought that you would be happy about it" Your heart does a little leap, you get all warm and a little dizzy too. You look from one to the other. "You brought things?" "Of course, the birthday girl is getting spoiled today," Hunter says with a grin. Crosshair grumbles, "Don't look at me, I was forced to come here". You can't help but laugh at his dry comment. "I actually believe you," you say, amused, but with a reproving look at Tech you say, "Didn't I ask you not to tell anyone?" As your stomach growls loudly again, Tech says, "We should go inside and eat something" "Yeah, let's make a base for the Spotchka," Wrecker rumbles happily. Tech has come up with something nice, a tabletop grill on which everyone can make their own food while sitting around it in a convivial circle. Fish, meat, vegetables and fruit, the guys have brought of course also dips and sauces. Echo and Tech shoo you out of your own kitchen to prepare the ingredients for the table grill and distribute them in bowls. As you're about to at least set the table, Wrecker grabs you by the shoulders and gently but firmly shoves you into a chair. "You wait here until everything is ready," he says with a wink. "Um... okay, cool." You grin inanely to yourself the whole time, you can't quite grasp what's happening here yet, but it feels great. The guys are just wonderful. What you thought was going to be the worst birthday in a long time turns into the best birthday of your life so far.

You all eat together, you have not been so full for a long time. After that, plenty of Spotchka flows, dirty jokes are told and board games and card games are unpacked. You haven't laughed so much in a long time.

Ko-Fi (If you feel like giving me some coffee)

@rintheemolion

@andyoufollowyourheart @clone-whore-99

@brynhildrmimi @kaliel2310

@misogirl828 @tech-deck

@meshla-madalene

@chxpsi

@thebahdbitch

@nahoney22 @ladykatakuri

@darkangel4121

@ttzamara

@arctrooper69

@padawancat97

@agenteliix

@allsystemsblue

@palliateclaws

@either-madness-or-brilliance

@ortizshinkaroff

@andy-solo1

@hunterssecretrecipe

@heyitsaloy

@greaser-wolf

@extrahotpixels

@hated-by-me

@hunterxcrosshair

@malicemercy

@bebopsworld

@echos-girlfriend

@cpnt616

@dangraccoon

@starwarsnerd111

#hunter #wrecker #echo #crosshair #tech #tbb #tbb fanfiction #crosshair tbb #echo tbb #hunter tbb #star wars tbb #sw tbb #tbb crosshair #tbb echo #tbb hunter #tbb tech #tbb tech x reader #tbb wrecker #tbb x reader #wrecker tbb #bad batch #the bad batch #clone force 99 #tech tbb #star wars #bad batch tech #tech x female reader #tech x reader #tech x you

[birchbow]

Gamzee often refers to himself as “pan-rotted” due to his sopor-eating habit as a wriggler (and so does pretty much everyone else at some point). He told Kurloz that he has to really focus in order to remember mission instructions a few chapters back, I think? Gamzee doesn’t have a great self image, but it seems true that he’s often slow to draw inferences unless he’s already paying attention for hints about something specific. Like his default awareness is a little more diffuse, and he has to put in deliberate effort to narrow it down on a particular problem? He attributes this to the sopor, and so does everyone else. What I’m asking is - sopor aside - does being neglected by a lusus affect a troll’s brain development? (Beyond emotional stability and the ability to form secure attachments, ouch.) Since lusii don’t talk I’m not sure about language acquisition but maybe lusii respond positively to grubs babbling? Sidenote: the fact that Gamzee has the scriptures memorized so well almost feels like his chronically understimulated pan grabbed these abundant in-person interactions with authority figures in his early schoolfeeds and ate it up like starving. Sorry this is so rambling 😅

I'm incapable of being brief, especially when I get long asks with lots to chew over, so here's a readmore!

SO There's a moment in canon where Gamzee outright says "[sopor] rots you. Rusts your motherfucking thinkpan." and I think it's up for debate to what extent that's true but also it does seem pretty reasonable that heavy/consistent drug use throughout your adolescence would leave you some cognitive issues!

(Although also, as a person who tests super well in things I intuitively Get and am interested in, but often feels slow and dull, can't fit certain subjects/concepts into my head, and has a hard time remembering all the steps of things I want to do,,,, I put a lot of myself into my characters, is what I'm saying lol.)

RE: not having a lusus, I think that probably would have way more effect than the kid who went through it would assume, yeah. Like, all trolls would know your lusus keeps you safe from predators/intruders, gives you early practice fighting/wrestling, and especially in more rural areas, scavenges and hunts for you especially when you're young. But trolls as a society definitely undervalue the part where they also provide a sense of security and affection, because you're not supposed to want or value those things as a troll!

It's hard to make direct connections since lusii only sort of resemble human parents, but there's certainly studies to show that children of neglectful human parents struggle forming the cognitive pathways they would otherwise establish, and have trouble later in life--even if your caretaker doesn't talk, it seems pretty reasonable to me that having a parental figure who fucks off for long periods of time and leaves you completely alone with no idea when they'll be back would have a pretty similar effect across species! I'm not well-educated enough on that topic to draw the parallels I would want to, but it feels like a solid theory.

Also, quite apart from any of that, there was definitely a chain of cause and effect from "dad doesn't want me and there's no food" to "...but I have sopor slime" to "this makes me less hungry and also I give less of a shit about how hungry and lonely I am" to "if I stop eating this I feel shitty and have a hard time thinking straight and there's like a decade of repressed emotions under there".

RE: scripture, one of the things that I see original-flavor/canon Gamzee do is be all in on his religion, and when that falls out from under him, reorient to the first convincing power he finds, which unfortunately for everybody is the whole mess of Doc Scratch/Li'l Cal/Lord English. It to me feels very much like a guy who has no idea how to make his own ideological support structure, and is desperately looking for someone to give him a belief system and set of rules to follow.

ANYWAY SO hopefully it's fairly clear how that carries forward in a universe where instead, he gets a supportive church that helps him sober up and channels all his deeply-repressed rage into "hey, those aliens over there need conquering, go kill em", and also he's offered these books that are like. The rules. And knowing them gets him approval, and reassures him when he feels like a fuckup, and it turns out he can learn things, if they're things that fit in his brain right, and that's reassuring because he genuinely thinks most of his failings are his own fault for wanting sopor, and Alternian addiction support boils down to "do that again and we'll cull you" so they sure the fuck don't have a compassionate attitude about recovery or good information into after-effects, so everybody else is also just like "yeah, probably you fucked up your brain, idk, git gud".

This is a very lengthy way of agreeing with you lmao. The feedback loop of "oh you're pretty good at this" from authority figures, and it being a topic that he naturally had an interest in, definitely is a big part of why he's so deeply into it.

#ask time! #price of forgiveness #gamzee makara #i don't usually tag canon characters but also this became more of a character ramble than actually about the fic so #gamzee: gets a new faith #gamzee: immediately goes ALL THE FUCK IN #hey yknow when you have a religious crisis so you get a new one raise the dark destructive savior #and then drag your mutilated immortal body through the desert to serve him while he repeatedly kills you for fun #just normal church things that normal people with normal levels of devotion do :o)

[an-exasperated-hades-kid]

Ok so I've just finished reading the tsats for the third time and was scrolling on tumblr when I saw that people were coming for will again like the I get that people have their own opinions and they're allowed to have them but like these people are wrong on so many levels and I'm gonna defend will again but this time it's him from the sun and the star.

Problems that people have with will :

1. Will was trying to fix nico :

No he wasn't dude this whole time will was horrified because of the underworld which went against his nature and everything he stands for like will is a child of the sun who is attracted to life and light like a moth,and he does his best to prevent death as he is a healer and the underworld is full of death and darkness so will subconsciously thinks that its a bad place . While will thinks this and expresses his opinion by saying that I could never stay here , he never says anything bad about nico or to nico like yes he finds nico collecting bones unusual ( which it kinda is but it's also cool as hell ) but he also accepts it as nicos hobby and says nothing . He never indicates that he wants nico to change himself and he's just confused about how to show nico that he loves him in a way nico will appreciate because he feels that nico doesn't always want his light which is why he asks persephone on how to do it and then throughout the book he learns that light and darkness have a balance and that he also has darkness inside him (sorry I got off topic 😅) but he accepts nicos darkness ( he's never been against it and kinda gets it but yk he completely gets it now) and he loves him for it and apologizes for his closed mindset before on two occasions and he was never trying to upset nico in the first place.

2. Will being an asshole:

Now I have no idea where this came from but willam Andrew Solace is not a jerk. He was confused about the culture of the troglodytes but after sometime he was nothing but appreciative, supportive ( of hiss majesty) and thankful of them . Same with the underworld he was put off at first but then he realized the beauty of the underworld and was nothing but appreciative and apologizes for being close minded. He is a caring boyfriend and tries to understand the dark parts off nico and be supportive like in page 35 he tries to comfort nico after his nightmare . He tries to understand nicos feelings but admits ( in page 198) that sometimes it's hard for him . He asks about meeting nico's dad as he knows that he's important to nico and in turn will says he's important to will because he cares about what nico cares about and tries to not invalidate him . On page 373 he asks about nico's mom but as soon as he senses that nico might be uncomfortable he quickly tells nico that he doesn't have to say anything and that he doesn't mean to pry he's genuinely curious about nicos past . On page 229 he says that they should talk to Chiron about giving credit to the underworld farm for making ambrosia and this tells us that he's a fair person and yk jerks are not . On page 227 he even says that they shouldn't be too rude too greyon as some people change like Ethan and Luke for the better like this boy is soo kind that he potentially forgave Luke, the same Luke who was the reason why he lost soo many of his siblings and now he's willing to give a giant a second chance . I feel like we forgot that this dude is going to save a titan he never met and that he's going litteral super hell for his bf because he didn't want him to be alone .

3. Will is controlling :

Again no he is not actually like my bro told nico that he shouldn't shadow travel without reason as it is bad for his Health which we know he's right about and he's not forcing nico to do anything he's telling him a fact which nico knows is true so he goes along with it . And I feel like people forget that no matter how terrified and confused will was, he trusts nicos judgment like when both of them enter tartarus and nico tells Will to hold onto his ankles and will was confused but he did it and he didn't let go even as he was screaming .

4. Will doesn't trust nico :

Yes he does bro he trusts him enough to let nico take him nyx's palace which he couldn't see at the moment like he knew that if he fell he'd fall into chaos and cease to exist so yeah 😐

5. Will was whining too much :

Bro will was dying ever since he set foot in the underworld like his wounds weren't cloting, and he was emotionally, mentally, and physically exhausted, and he was forgetting things . My bros life force was being drained he was tweaking in tartarus like son was losing his shit and going insane but he never showed hesitation of going into tartarus like nico was worried about him and thought of going away because he didnt want will to be hurt but will was undeterred .

I think that's it, and if I missed something please tell me , I'm sorry If it doesn't make sense I'm sleep deprived rn because of exams and could barely tell if what I was typing made sense . I also wanna add that everyone is entitled to their opinion, but before you criticize a character, make sure what you're saying isn't countered in the canon text . Ik many people were disappointed by Wills' characterization, but he's actually not a bad person in canon he's just a confused little night light, but he's trying his best ok so let him live 😭. Thank you for listening to my rant, and have a good good day

#defending will solace #nico di angelo #solangelo #the sun and the star #will solace #sorta character analysis #percy jackon and the olympians #heros of olympus #my bro is 16 ok ? let him live #hes better than most teens atleast hes trying to understand his bf and not thinking that hes always right like most teenagers #will solace is a good person ok? if you think different you my friend are wrong /hj

[blackgirlfandomwriter]

Dating Twice🌚........

~ Imma start this off by saying that no ordinary girl can just date Twice 

~ If you do not meet the following requirements please exit stage left:

~ Someone whos VERY patient

~ Doesn't get shaken up or frightened easily

~ Mentally Stable because God knows he's far from that 

~ Be able to handle him when he's splitting 

~ And have the stamina to give him all of your attention 24 fucking 7💀

~ Also don't call him by his birth name.... just don't 

~ Back to this man being an absolute attention whore 

~ Twice is very clingy when it comes to you 

~ He always wants to know about your whereabouts and who you're hanging around 

~ Not answering his calls or texts? 

~ That's fine because he will be climbing through your window in the next 20 minutes 😃😃

~ Another part of Twice being clingy is his constant need to touch you 

~ He claims it calms him 🤷🏽‍♀️

~ This means lots of cuddles

~ Tight handholds

~ Cheek and nose kisses 

~ Etc Etc Babes😆

~ Amusement park and Science museum dates

~ Don't ask me why heffa‼️

~ Twice is what I like to call a Ferris Wheel romantic 

~ Like yall DEADASS had yall's first kiss on a Ferris wheel🥰

~ Anyways!This man lovesssss pillow talk 

~ Like deadass, Twice will literally talk you to sleep about complete nonsense, and its fucking adorable 

~ He'll usually start off by asking how your day was, which will definitely lead to a plethora of other topics to talk about 😅

~ His eyes sparkle every time you speak, IDC IDC ✋🏽

~ Late-night dances are a must  

~ Sadly Twice can be verbally abusive due to his split personality

~ But please trust that this is not on purpose and he definitely always apologizes

~ Sometimes when he knows he went too far, he'll shower you with gifts just to show how sorry he is

~ A pro to this, however, you can always count on his alter ego to tell you what he's really thinking and feeling

~ And don't even get me started on the lude comments 🤣

~ Aside from this, Twice is very sweet and respectful when it comes to you 

#twice #mha #mha headcanons #mha fanfiction #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #bnha #bnha fanfiction #dating headcanons #bnha twice #jin bubaigawara #mha fandom #mha fanfic idea #bnha fanfic recs #twice mha x reader #boku no hero #league of villians x reader #jin bubaigawara imagines #jin bubaigawara x reader #twice x reader

[aleksa-sims]

RL Simselfstory (18+)

CW: adult topics, unplanned pregnancy

N. told me why he was so mad at P. In short, it was about my Dad.😒 But I’ll explain, when I tell my parents about N. & me. After we talked, we went up to his bedroom. It was already light. We just talked all night about everything that had to be clarified (N.'s fiancee). This was a lot!! But it had to be! I needed to know, if Nico was really serious about me. I believed N.! He never lied to me, so I trusted him. Also, I decided to divorce Daniel😭,once I talked to my parents.

Nico: Why are you still on P.’s side and stick by him? That’s exactly what Daniel also said, when he and I talked. I was always the bad guy for you, but never Philip. You blamed me for everything, including his yoga bitch... But well, just fuck it. 😕

Me: I tried to stay friends with him. He was always there for me. But it didn't work out! In the end, we were just yelling at each other and even later, after I met D. And whenever I was mad at Philip, I was mad at you, too. This wasn't fair. Sorry N. And I don’t have feelings for P., if you think that. Really not! This was a mistake anyway. We all failed. 🤷‍♀️

Nico: Is there anything else you wanna tell me or ask me, before we ..... well, move on?

Me: Um.... actually,.... yes! But maybe I should let sleeping dogs lie?

Nico: No idea what that means? Tell me!

Me: You remember Sofia. I saw her a few times last year. Sof liked to annoy me about you. She made fun of me and said you treated me like a... sex slave. 🫤 I didn’t know exactly what she meant, but....ugh, anyway! Is that true? Did you want that from me?

Nico: 🤣🤣... Did I ever keep you in chains or whipped you or something? 😅

Me: Stop teasing me, jerk! You know damn well what I mean.

Nico: Nah, I’m not really keen on hurting you or into pain in general. You know that! I told you that before, too. But some discipline wouldn’t hurt you, babe. 😅

Me: You see? That's exactly what I meant! You kept playing your carzy mind games with me. You, with your will to subjugate me in every way.

Nico: Yea, and?... I never forced you to do anything!! And that’s the difference! If you didn’t want something, I didn’t want it either. But I know you wanted to please me and did everything to satisfy me. And you've done absolutely right. You’re just perfect for me.😏 I loved you like crazy. And Sofia, that manipulative bitch... I got SO pissed! I just wanted to protect you! My whole pad was smoky bcs of you two! You were totally stoned, brain-dead!

Me: Says the guy who put his fist through a wall. 🤨 And btw, you were constantly pissed! Not just that day.

Nico: Don’t you think we’ve talked enough?... Be a good girl and do as I say 😏😄 ... Get undressed and follow me to the bathroom.

Me: Ironically, the shower?.... You wanna get me depressed or what?

Nico: No! Never... Let's start again, where it left off.

I had still my wedding going on in my head. I told myself, " you had to stop thinking about Daniel, that’s not fair! Do it, or end this rn!" Suddenly Nico said something to me... something totally unimportant, which I actually forgot. He talked about my obession for my coconut shower gel. He asked me, if I still use it? Somehow this short conversation about that, made me feel good. It was like a kind of confirmation for me, that I needed at that very moment. I felt, he's always been the one and so I really started to let go of Daniel. And I succeeded! I was happy with Nico but...anyway.🤯

My Simself was a little embarrassed about me posting those spicy pics. 😳🫣 But no joke, I always struggle to poste something like this.

Nico: You see, babe? I have no prob getting on my knees for you, too.

Me: Yea, sure! 🤨 You only do that bcs there’s not enough room here in the shower. But you don't have to do that fo rme!!

Me: I hope you really dumped her. I know you didn’t mean to cheat on her, but if this isn’t over with you two yet, you’re cheating on me too now. 😟

Nico: I'm confused... But why do you think I lied to you?

Me: I don't really think that. I-... I just wanna be sure.

Nico: I understand why you have doubts, but honestly? That sucks. I don't wanna think or talk about her at all rn. I can’t go back to her after seeing you again. Even if I wanted to, I can’t. I can’t give up on you.

Me: And I can’t say no to you. I never could and you know that. That's why-... I thought you might take advantage of that... Sorry, I’m gonna shut up now.🤦‍♀️

I shouldn’t have thought that much about that girl, but paid a little more attention to another important topic. PROTECTION!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I forgot to tell N., that I had this.... hormone-free thing/ IUD removed in summer... As you know, that hormone-free IUD, had caused me damage. And my doc said, the risk of not having kids, because of the injuries I already got, was too high! He advised Daniel and me to simply use condoms. That was the only option we had. But we didn't! Daniel just paid attention when we had sex not to... knock me up. But even if I had become pregnant by him, it would have been okay for us.

But now back to the actual aim/topic of this post. 👶 N. & I had sex. He used a rubber. But when he was.......well, done, he removed it and just kept going with me. I thought, okay? Either he’s extremely horny, or...... no idea what he was up to? I could have stopped him, but I didn’t!! I thought I wouldn’t get pregnant anyway and if, it's too late? However, I was kind of sure I couldn’t have kids. Daniel & I wanted a Baby after we got married, but it just never happend. So why should it be different with Nico? After just one fucking time!?

Even if our Baby was not planned & and N. & I actually had an affair/ a fling at that time , I can say that it was.... made with Love. N. said, "I love you", when it happend. 🩷🩵 But, hm!? He always says that to me in that... particular situation. Still, I think he meant it honestly, I could feel it and not just that! Don't ask me why, but I just knew he................. hit a home-run.😨

Previous/ Next

#ts4 #sims 4 story #myrlgameplay #rl story #18+ content #cw adult themes #cw pregnancy #sims spice #sims 4

[msmargaretmurry]

Matthew curls/slutty collarbone-appreciating anon again - BOSTON!!! Home of another rat king! My home! (Not living there at the moment, but I miss it so, if you’ve seen Letterkenny/that one episode with the two dudes from Newfoundland getting all melancholy and homesick when Newfoundland is mentioned, that is me rn. No hard feelings re: Ratthew et al. knocking out Boston, though, I was still cheering for my slutty rat boy in the final.) I hope you and all of the other scholars are having an excellent time! Are you attending/watching any games? Don’t know if the Bruins are home or away tho, I haven’t been to the Garden in years, it’s such a fun venue. Bummed the PWHL team won't be able to play there, but I get it, schedule's packed. (Much as I love Boston, I will readily admit that the fans are… eh. Basketball is probs the best of the bunch.)

Matthew is only escalating his slut phase and I am living for it, that French girl lounging, Matthew is not beating those submissive and breedable accusations (or at least the breedable ones, he’s down for a fight first, if someone wants to wrestle him down and sink their teeth into the back of his neck and hold him there he/I will not be opposed, you know.) And you know, in a post-trade Matthew/Leon scenario, what’s a rat boy to do when he’s surrounded by men who want to fuck him up/probably also fuck him, when his former ?? hookup/fuckbuddy/fuckenemy/boyfriend/baby daddy (????) is all the way in Edmonton, not flirt with them? And of course when you’re a bitchy tank who only gets to play his… whatever Ratthew is to him, best not to think about that, twice a year, you’re not gonna not seize the opportunity/nearest storage closet to chew him up a little. It’s just not done.

I am very here for this vampire AU and neck/throat appreciation/biting. I am also generally here for Matthew the problem child and/or Matthew the generally good and together child whose one moment of rebellion is bringing home a nightmare boyfriend and/or Matthew with daddy problems or at least an adrenaline/danger kink whose constitution is incapable of not goading hot vampire into trying to bite him. And hot vampires cannot be blamed, he is flashing an irresponsible amount of collarbone as is.

hello again anon! yay boston!! absolutely one of my favorite cities. i am home now and even though i love home i am missing it already. just a lovely place to spend a lovely long weekend with lovely friends (whom i also miss already 😭😭😭). i am, i'm sorry to tell you, anti-boston sports (me being an east coaster NOT from boston, i feel like this shouldn't be a surprise), but y'all do always seem have a handful of players i love anyway, and even i must admit fenway is one of the most fun ballparks i've ever been to. the bruins sadly were not in town, but we went to the bc vs. denver game on saturday, and on sunday we schlepped out to worcester for a railers game, and both of those were very fun 💞

but onto the more important topic: our beloved rat boy. a concept related to your original ask i am currently mulling over is one where they are Totally Just Frenemies Who Occasionally Sleep Together (they used to be rivals who occasionally slept together but leon is not going to call anyone who plays in florida a "rival") which means that matthew can fuck whoever he wants. and does. and tells leon all about it while they hook up, and for some reason comes out of these hookups looking like leon tried to eat him alive. perhaps he will need to invest in a tshirt that he hasn't mutilated so that he can talk to the media in the days afterward without showing off all the teeth-shaped bruises he seems to have acquired. surely this all means nothing. 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

i have a couple of other asks about the vampire leon extended universe so i am going to save my thoughts about THAT for answering those so i can stick them all in their own tag 😅 thank yoooouuuu for the ask though!! 💖

#ask #matthew and leon #hockey for ts

[yonezawacastle]

hello!!! are you playing the latest event??? at first i didn't pay much attention to it, but i started playing with shingen's route, and got the inspo for a fanfic 😅. i didn't see the theme in other events, and i liked it. your opinion???

PS: I'm the type of person who imagines a lot of scenarios and stories for fanfics, but doesn't know how to write them, so I doubt I'll do it.😅🥲

Omggg I am so sorry it took me 84 years to answer this. My week kind of went sideways.

Shingen's route is the only one I've had time for this week, and honestly? I fucking love it. Understanding why retainers follow their lords with such loyalty is a topic the game circles back to a lot, and I'm pretty sure I'll never get tired of it. And we really see Shingen at his best and most heroic here. Dude really would walk through Hell itself to protect people he cares about.

(This is slightly off topic, but Shingen's ability to just shrug off the worst things that happen to him, often with a smile, makes me want to know just how much of Yukimura's temperament is innate and how much of it is the result of wanting to imitate Shingen, consciously or not. Certainly Shingen seems to have loomed large in his formative years.)

And him actually listening to MC when she's talking about her cooking techniques? Swoon. I love a hero who takes his lady's interests seriously and holds her talent in high regard.

As far as fanfic goes...seriously, don't feel bad. I have a genuinely obscene amount of fic ideas but I rarely get around to them or share the ones I've written down. My goal for this year is to just...put stuff out there, basically, because let's be real this fandom is tiny af and if we want fan content we're probably gonna have to make most of it ourselves.

I would love love love to see anything you come up with if/when you decide to write it up. :)

#asks

[cvpitvno]

This might be very specific but do you think you could write about you dating wooyoung and you guys are hanging out with ateez and they’re talking about how they’ve made girls squirt but you haven’t yet and they kinda tease wooyoung and he makes sure when you guys get home it happens 😅 sorry it’s kinda long

EXPERT OPINION (fem!reader / afab!reader)

the ateez dorm never had a dull moment within in — especially not considering the eight rowdy and unapologetically open boys that lived within it.

you'd think that with you, wooyoung's girlfriend sitting mere meters from the rest of the boys on his lap, they would have refrained from talking about such intimate and sexual topics — but perhaps it was the length in which they've known you, already considering you to be a part of their makeshift family.

"god, there's just something so much more satisfying about making a girl squirt," yunho groaned, his head falling limp against the back of the couch. "the way it feels for me while also knowing the pleasure i bring her just... it just gets me off in a different way."

numerous hums of agreement echoed throughout the room, a whispered 'amen' falling from mingi's lips.

jongho, while in agreement, argued back, "but creaming is still better in my eyes."

"as if — how so?" hongjoong laughed at the maknae's conflicting opinion.

with a shrug of his shoulders, he tried to find the words to explain himself. "don't get me wrong, i love making my girl squirt, but there are so many things that make creaming better," he tried to end it there but the questioning brows forced him to continue. "okay... the sight of cum leaking out is a sight a man can't not love, the clean-up is so much easier, and i've always found girls that creme can go for longer than a girl who squirts."

while you were sure his last point couldn't be statistically correct, you let him sound sure of himself, knowing you had no experience to use to back yourself up.

an argument broke out at the youngest's points, wooyoung chiming in about how lazy jongho had to be to think cleaning up after a girl squirts makes creaming better, seonghwa arguing that he should find the mere sight of pleasure on his partner's face to be more satisfying than anything else, and so on and so forth.

while you zoned out, trying to tune out their inappropriate conversation, one of the member's eyes locked onto you.

"well what is your opinion on it y/n?" yeosang spoke. "do you prefer creaming or squirting?"

you found your face grow hot at the boy's words, the sight of all the members turned onto you now, and the feeling of wooyoung's fingers digging into the fat of your hips.

"i- i really don't have enough experience to have an opinion on that.." you tried to brush it off, but it seemed that san had taken particular offence to your statement.

"not enough experience my ass! you and wooyoung fuck like rabbits!" he laughed at the thought of you and wooyoung not being physical for more than a day straight.

your face heated more, recalling the many times one (or more) of the boys have walked in on you and wooyoung in a compromising position.

"jesus christ san, you're really gonna make me say this?" you mumbled through gritted teeth. "i've never squirted before.. so i can't have an opinion on which of them is better."

the room went uncharacteristically quiet — something that rarely happened in the ateez dorm — as the boys tried to let your confession sink in.

one boy, in particular, taking the time to let that very something sink deep into his brain.

he's never made you squirt.

he hasn't made his own girlfriend — that of which for almost two years now — squirt.

maybe the boys had finally realized the awkwardness of the situation for you, or maybe they were shocked at the fact that you've never squirted — or better worded, shocked at the fact that the self-proclaimed 'sex god' or 'sex addict', named wooyoung, has failed to make his very own girlfriend squirt.

wooyoung's fingers tightened around your waist — be it by instinct due to embarrassment or if it was his way of silently telling you that the two of you would talk about it later.

san and yeosang shared a look, knowing that the fire behind wooyoung's eyes burned brighter than ever before.

"well on that note," wooyoung's grip loosened on your hips, gently smacking your hip as his way of telling you to stand up. "we're gonna head up to my room for the night."

he walked towards his room with no other word, but the feeling of where his hand had smacked your hip told you to follow after him promptly.

you nodded towards the boys and tried to force a smile — the nerves for what the night ahead of you held and the tenseness of the room making it hard to seem genuine.

as if the situation couldn't get any worse, hongjoong called teasingly after your retreating figure, "ay, make sure to text the group chat what you think afterwards, yeah?" his voice teasingly lifted at the end, and with a look over your shoulder in embarrassment, you caught to exaggerated wink sent your way by the boy.

in the end, wooyoung had to send the message in your place.

#𖤐 — atz writings. #wooyoung x reader #wooyoung imagine #wooyoung smut #jung wooyoung x reader #jung wooyoung imagine #jung wooyoung smut #ateez x reader #ateez imagine #ateez smut #kpop x reader #kpop imagine #kpop smut

[storm-breaker7]

• Code name: TANGO •

Pairing: Rex X Reader X Fives

Summary: Being one of the best pilots you gain the attention of the republic. You become a getaway driver for the 501st battalion but when an assignment is given to Anakin, you find yourself between a rock and a hard place.

Warnings: Swearing, A creepy perverted fat dude (yea. It's a warning in itself), Fem reader, Very spicy (I may continue if I have modivation)

A/n: Sorry this took so long but holy water and grass for 50 cents 😅 (The sins I have committed in this one fanfic is scarry 💀🔥) please lemme know if you want the extended version- this has been in my drafts for way to long tho so it's outta here.

Edit: Help why are so many ppl liking this post. I really thought this would be a major flop. Why is this even past 10 likes 💀💀💀

I groaned, "This slagger won't fucking work!" Grumbling to myself how nice it would be if R2 showed up to help. This ship is as stubborn as me, and it's getting annoying. My comm buzzed and I picked it up after I had let out a string of course words. "Yea?" I asked into the comm,

"We have a new assignment, we need you for this one so be up at the bridge. Were starting in 10 minutes." General Skywalker explained over the comm.

"Be there in a shake, General" I told him and ended the call before he could argue again how I don't have to call him general. I left the tools on the floor and went to clean myself up. I could hear footsteps coming down the hall behind me but I continued on, I'm being paranoid.

"Hey Tango!" I heard Fives call,

"You do know you only have to call me that on missions?" I called over my shoulder as I continued down the hall. Fives jogged up next to me and started to walk backward so he could face me.

"Come on, You know I know you love it when I call you that" He pointed at me and himself boldly, I only hummed and gave him a side glance that, to put it simply, said 'Sureee'.

"Whatever floats your boat Fives" I say before stopping at my door and punching in the code. "Cya later" I wave at him as I closed the door, chuckling quietly when you heard his pleas for you to let him in.

I walked into my personal bathroom and washed my hands from the grease quickly. I looked into the mirror and tried scrubbing away some grease off my cheek and forehead. I sighed and gave my face a little splash.

Then I walked back out and pulled my shirt off. I pulled a half decent shirt on and walked back out again. If I'm right I have about 4 minutes to get to the bridge.

I heaved out breaths and slowed in front of the bridge doors. I took a deep breath, fixed my ruffled hair and walked in still huffing lightly. "For a second I thought you weren't coming Y/n." Ashoka joked and I only smiled at her,

"You know me," I started and she joined in saying a phrase that went back between us both, "Fashionably late is just my/your style" We both laughed before getting back on topic, General Skywalker was waiting with a small smile on his face. A hologram near where the General was standing had a human male that was the definition of fat rolls, Don't make me throw up breakfast.

"Alright. We have been given intel that this mob boss, here," Anakin gestured to the hologram, "Is selling black market goods to the separatist. We either were going to get Ashoka or Y/n to be the distraction while Me, Rex and Fives sneak into here, his storage shed at these docks. We only need enough time to slip in, get evidence and slip out" Anakin gestured to another hologram that popped up, Anakin gulped and sucked a breath in, "So... Who's the distraction?"

I cut in immediately, "I'll go, Ashoka is too young to be trying to get an ugly mug that to touch her." I stated quickly placing my hand on Ashokas shoulder.

"She has a point, General. N-not that I want her to touch... That" Fives stumbled over his words as he explained himself. Anakin shook his head,

"We can do it another way-"

"Anakin." I walked up and patted his shoulder, "Just tell me for how long and I'll do it. I don't want anyone touching her, being the age she is."

Anakin huffed, a war raging behind his eyes, "Fine. But if I say get out of there, I mean it. No risking it."

"You got it, General." I smiled at him, "I've gotta dress the part though don't I?"

"How many times must I tell you? I'm tired of telling you? Just Anakin is fine" He huffed out a sad laugh and glanced away, "But yea, I'll get Ashoka to take the dress to your room. Be ready by 1930 hours and meet at the ship you were just working on. It's going down tonight, the council wants no delay." Anakin glanced back and sighed waving me away and worked on the plan with Rex. Me and Ashoka walked out of the bridge and down the endless halls.

I noticed Fives and Rex exchange glances multiple times throughout that whole thing... Maybe they were just worried about me. I zoned out of my daze when Ashoka tapped my shoulder, "Sorry what?" I asked, glancing down at her quickly.

"Go to your room and I'll grab the dress for ya" Ashoka repeated with a smile, I nodded and returned it. Ashoka parted off down another hall and I continued on down to my quarters. It was a good few minutes before I got to my room and I took the extra time I had to take a quick shower.

I turned the water off, missing its warmth already now that the cold air replaced it. A knock at my door sounded and I raised a brow as I peeked my head threw the bathroom door into my bedroom. "The door is open Ashoka! What are you waiting for?"

"Uhm.. what?" I heard Fives say,

"Goddamn it Fives. I have to go soon and aren't you meant to be getting debriefed right now?" I called back keeping my body in the bathroom, just in case.

"It's finished, Y/n, Ashoka told us Skywalker needed her help so she got me to take your dress.... And Fives just tagged along." Rex explained and I mentally cursed, Just had to be those two-

"Hey it's alright. Uhm I'm still finishing up in my bathroom so just put it on my bed, if that's not a problem" I said closing the bathroom door and started pacing in the bathroom waiting for them to leave my dress so I can get dressed.

The door opened with a hiss and I heard their light footsteps walk in then out again and the door hissed closed. I sighed as I walked out of the bathroom, then called out, "Thanks boys! Appreciate it!" A small call back from Fives was all I could hear and It made me smile lightly.

I walked to my bed that was in the corner of the room. I smiled as I picked up the dress. The beautiful royal blue silk cascaded down like a waterfall. At least I got to stay in our colours, I thought to myself.

I pulled the towel off and dried myself before slipping it on. I grimaced, "God fucking damnit" Was all I managed. The dress I had on had large slits on the side that let everyone have a nice view of my thighs, but thankfully covered up everything else.

I sighed but continued on, grabbing black high heels and putting on a black leather bracelet, it's my comm system. I brushed my hair quickly before grabbing my heels and running out barefoot. I have to make it in time.

By now I had run past many clones that may have or almost passed out, I was concerned but I kept runnin', I can't be late again. I ran smack into the doors because I forgot to open them but I quickly recovered and opened it, walking through. I cursed to myself and made my way over to the ship I was working on not 45 minutes ago. It's fine I was only fixing some small things.

"I sure hope I'm not late guys. Wouldn't that be wonderful? Late both... Times... ...uhm.. Why are you all looking at me like that?" I slowed down to a stop and shook the heels in my hand lighty. I was getting real nervous, this silence was stretching out forever. "Does it not look good-? I don't really have time to chan-"

"No, nono no. You look great. Really great." Fives waved his hands around, "Were just.... Stunned.."

"Uh-huh.... Well come on we don't have all night. Can't be dreaming about me, we got a mission to complete" I joked and stepped into the ship and waved everyone else in, "I thought I was late, Come on"

Ashoka had a mischievous grin on her face and I could hear the General whisper yelling 'no' repeatedly. Rexs' face was red and priceless and Fives suddenly found the floor interesting. The general and commander walked in with Rex and Fives close behind. I walked into the cockpit and started the small-ish ship up.

The ear piece was uncomfortable but I dealt with it in the end. We had split off earlier, me and Ashoka were dropped near the club and the others went off to the dock. Ashoka was only meant to be in the club and somewhere close to me for back up, and when I mean back up I mean if someone pulls a blaster on me she can help.

I walked in with a sway, god I hate heels, and made my way over to the bar. "Where is he?" I asked Ashoka, but quietly because the boys and us shared this comm frequency.

"To your right. In the corner with Twi'leks all over him." Ashoka whispered back.

"Got it, Thanks" I whispered before setting off toward the Mob boss. I could hear Anakin and Ashoka lightly arguing in my ear piece but I ignored them and stalked over to the target.

He got up and practically brushed off all the Twi'leks he had gathered and started walking away, Something must be up I thought. I put my path on his and 'accidentally' ran into him. God has he ever heard of a breath mint?

He looked me up and down like a creep. "What's a pretty girl like you doing in this part of town?" He drunkenly slurred, tracing a finger down my arm.

I grimaced but continued to do my job, "You first" I purred, trying my best to think of how much I saved Ashoka from doing this.

"Well if you want to follow me, I'll show you enough" His words were still slurred as he leaned forward.

"Well I'd have to turn that offer down. I'm only here for a drink." I thanked the maker I was a good lair because it came in handy at times like these.

"Just a drink, dressed in this?" He asked, fiddling with the front part of the silky dress.

I heard Anakin and Rex bark something in my ear and it didn't sound good. The target turned away a tad and checked his comm that was buried deep in a pocket, somewhere where I wasn't going to bother looking.

I forced my best smirk on and turned and walked away from bar and his 'hideout' altogether, hoping like hell he'd follow.

"Playing hard to get, huh? Two can play at that game" He growled as he caught up, pushing past people trying to catch up to me. I gulped and kept walking.

"We've got it. Get out of there Tango. Now." Anakin whisper yelled over the ear piece.

"Alright." I responded with before I whipped around and let my fist fly to his face. "Whoops my bad, my hand slipped" I growled and stormed off leaving him a wheezing heap on the floor.

I burst out the bar and pulled my heels off. I sat down on a random bench nearby and sighed a relief. Thank the maker I'm out of that mess.

Getting back up again proved to be a hard thing to do after getting hit on by a whale, but I did and I continued on to the ship pushing past people. I didn't know nights got this busy here.

When I finally made it back to the rust bucket I was given a big hug by literally everyone. Ashoka first, then the general, and Fives jumped in then Rex after him.

"Yea guys don't worry, I don't need any air today" I joked and they all let go of me a smidge but didn't let go fully.

"I'm sorry you had to deal with that" Ashoka mumbled into my dress. I hugged them back with a small smile growing on my face. "Hey it's alright-" I started,

"No, it wasn't. I could hear everything he said. That chakaaryc got a fist to the face for a reason." Fives growled.

*Translation- Rotten, Lowlife [chah- KAR-eesh]*

"Guys you can let go I'm not going to disappear. Come on we have to get back to the cruiser." I suggested, lightly tapping Anakins' shoulder and Rexs' back. They all slowly detached from me and looked around guiltily. I shook my head and smiled as I walked up the ramp and into the cockpit.

Once everyone was in, I took of back toward the republic cruiser. Tonight was not so great, let's just hope that dinner will be better.

I landed the old rust bucket in the hanger then stepped out of the cockpit. I followed the others out and saw R2 frantically coming over here. He zoomed straight past Anakin, who was going to pat him like a puppy, and continued over to me.

R2 skidded to a stop in front of me then bumped my leg. I smiled and patted him, "What's up with you?" I asked and kneeled down to be eye level with R2.

"Traitor" Anakin called jokingly but continued off to report the mission to the council. I smiled and patted R2 once again before standing to my full height. I started to walk but stopped and turned back to R2 when he beeped up a storm.

"Don't tell me you came here just to say sorry about not helping R2." I shot back, He beeped a reply and I scoffed dramatically, "R2, I swear one day you are going to get decommissioned because of how sassy you are"

He beeped then followed after me as I walked off. We chatted on my way to my quarters then went off by his lonesome once I had gone into my quarters.

I placed my shoes down and pulled my jewelry off. Just as I was about to pull my dress off a knock sounded at my door. "Yea?" I called, flattening my dress out and walking over to the door. A few more furious knocks later and I opened the door. Fives came tumbling with Rex close behind, their blacks were hugging them tight and I gulped.

I closed the door and rolled my eyes, "What have you two done now? You can't keep hiding here whenever you start something." Fives sighed and Rex huffed,

"Fives decided it would be a great idea to start a-... Why are you still in your dress?" Rex gestured at me and I only frowned.

"I was just about to take it off when you two barged in" I grumbled and stalked over to the baggy shirt and some skinny jeans.

"Wait- Hold on a damn minute" Fives held his hand up. I put the clothes back on top of the dresser and turned to the two boys. "We have managed to find something we can share."

"I'm interested... I gotta see it" I grinned and waved my hands around.

"Well... If you insist.." Rex and Fives glanced at each other before walking up to me. I raised my brow at Fives as he circled around behind me and Rex walked straight up to me.

I swallowed thickly and froze. Fives started tracing patterns on my hip and they had both pressed themselves against me. My hands stayed strictly at my side though because I had some good bad ideas.

Fives leaned in and whispered into my ear from behind me, "Found it"

I'm half mad and half thankful at myself right now... And I'm not sure which one takes the cake. I thought as my eyes carefully watched Rex and Fives. I gave a curt nod, and Fives shot up to attack my neck. Me and Rex met halfway and he eased into the kiss.

I could feel Rex and Fives' hands roam trying to carefully yank the silky blue dress off me. The dress fell with a light thud and they both pulled away.

I felt their eyes drag down my body and I shifted uncomfortably under their gaze. Rex rested his hands on my hips and Fives leaned in whispering a small few words of approval, "Hotter than I expected, Cyar'ika"

I smiled back at him as I felt his hands slither up my back toward my bra and unclasped it, slipping it off. Rex let out a strangled groan as my bra joined the dress on the floor.

I turned around to Fives and smirked, "You both better start, I'm feeling a little left out here"

They both started to yank their blacks off and I pulled my underwear off leaving it in the pile of my clothes. I leaned back against the wall and watched the show unravel.

I let out a heavy and shakey breath as they both finished and threw their blacks somewhere else in the room. "You alright with us doing this mesh'la?" Rex asked as he and Fives guided me toward my bed.

Fives sat at the edge of the bed waiting just as I replied, "Do your worst"

#Star wars x reader #Clone wars x reader #Rex x reader #Fives x reader #501st #x reader #female reader #fanfic #star wars #storm7breaker posts