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trafficlightchild · 1 month

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DICK GRAYSON AND ROY HARPER ARE BEST FRIENDS DON’T LET DC FORGET IT

#my boys #dc #dc comics #dick grayson #roy harper #but wally but jason but but but #wally has hartley #and jason has eddie #but dc has two very small braincells #and forgets that characters can have multiple best friends #hartley rathaway #eddie bloomberg

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neptunezo · 1 month

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The batkids are known for sharing clothes amongst each other, so imagine everyone’s surprise when Jason won’t let them borrow his hoodie. Upon further inspection they find out it’s Roy’s hoodie. This causes a chain reaction and now Dick won’t let anyone borrow his Wally hoodie, Tim won’t let anyone borrow his Kon hoodie, Damian with Jon’s clothes(which there was no need for because Damian’s clothes never fit anyways), Duke with Izzy’s, Cass with Steph, and so on. After this “civil war” they all reluctantly agree to end this and all clothes (their own or not) is up for grabs. (minus Damian and Jon, of course)

bonus is when their partners steal the batkids clothes only to find out later that it’s definitely not a wayne kids clothing item.

Roy: That’s my sweater?

Wally: Yeah well Kon’s wearing my pants so…

Izzy: I’m probably wearing one of your boxers, it’s for sure not Dukes

Kon: how do you know?

Izzy: Because Duke doesn’t own Minecraft boxers???

Steph: Oh yeah sorry, those are mine

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hehether · 4 months

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Batboys with their sometimes-disappeared in Speedforce/ blown up at Sanctuary/ died after beating the shit out of Superboy-Prime/ imprisoned by a twisted version of his dad/ killed after losing a fcking global vote-besties

#batfam #richard grayson #jason todd #tim drake #damian wayne #bruce wayne #superman #conner kent #jon kent #wally west #roy harper #clark kent #superboy #kid flash

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thisiswhereikeepdcthings · 10 months

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Bruce once said, half-jokingly, that anyone who wanted to marry any of his kids had to beat hik in single combat first. Unfortunately, joking on the Bat looks dead serious to everyone not in his circle, so now Wally is busy learning Muay Thai, Roy is brushing up on Krav Maga, and Conner has resigned himself to living in sin. Steph just figures she'd ask Cass to fight her battles for her.

Conner: I’m sorry. I love you, but we can never marry.

Tim, thinking about who he might need to politely go ask Jason to take care of:

Conner, entirely serious: I’m never going to be able to beat your dad.

Tim, hearing “beat UP” because he was thinking about Jason punching Luthor:

Tim: I feel like further explanation might be necessary here.

Wally: Okay. I think I’m ready to fight Batman.

Dick, only half paying attention: *nods* I understand completely. I have the same urge all the time.

Jason: What do you MEAN you can’t marry me because Batman will beat you?

Roy: But Bruce said-

Jason: I don’t care what Bruce said. Actually, no. I do care. How DARE he-

*cut to Jason fighting Batman*

Roy: So does this count, or…

Bruce, at six am in a bathrobe and slippers: Steph, what are you doing here?

Steph: Outsourcing.

Cass: *comes flying at Batman from two stories above*

#batman #bruce wayne #batkids #batfam #dick grayson #wally west #jason todd #roy harper #tim drake #conner kent #stephanie brown #cassandra cain #birdflash #jayroy #timkon #stephcass

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tiger-in-the-flightdeck · 3 months

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"My favourite superhero is Green Lantern!"

"My favourite is the Flash!"

"Mine is Robin!"

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theaceofarrows · 19 days

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Welcome to the family

[Dick on the phone with Wally, while walking up the manors driveway]

Dick: I still can't believe that he got another kid! I'm gone for a few weeks, and suddenly, he gets empty nest syndrome, unbelievable

Wally: Yeah, definitely didn't see that one coming. So, have you met the kid yet?

Dick: [groans] I'm about to, not that I'm overly thrilled about this

Wally: I get it, dude. Just make sure not to take it out on the kid too much

Dick: Yeah, yeah, I'm not going to be a complete jerk. After all this mess isn't the kids fault

Dick: Ugh, I just hope this kid doesn't act like Bruce hung the starts or something-

Dick: [opens the front door]

Jason: -you really like the Frankenstein movie more than the book?! B, how STUPID can you be?!

Wally: [still on the other end of the line] What was that?

Dick: ...I'm gonna have to call you back, Wally

-

[Later]

Dick: [holding back laughter] And then, after he threw the tire iron he said- he said "Try and catch me you big boob!"

Wally: No way! He did not say that to Batman!

Dick: HE DID!

[hysterically laughing]

#dick grayson #wally west #jason todd #bruce wayne #incorrect batfamily quotes #batbros #batboys #batfamily #batfam #robin jason todd #this is cannon now #i thought about turning this into a fic but i don't have the energy #if anyone else wants to fine with me

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duckytree · 7 months

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ginger on ginger violence

for those wondering how bruce is doing: here

#dick grayson #nightwing #jason todd #red hood #wally west #flash #art #fanart #comic #dc #duckytree

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p1nkshield · 11 months

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Jason found out that the easiest way to get the things he wants from Bruce and Dick is to be the slightest bit cute. Chaos follows.

Bruce: Tell me again why you let Jason drive the Batmobile behind my back?

Dick: [mumbles]

Bruce: hn?

Dick: He called me big brother okay! He said please! He pulled the little wing card! I caved Bruce! I caved under the pressure!

Bruce: You can look Darkseid in the eye and crack jokes but the moment Jason says please you crack under pressure?

Dick: like you wouldn’t crumble into dust if he said “Hey Dad can I have a rocket launcher please?”

Bruce, thinking about it: … yeah I would fold like laundry.

Dick: Exactly!

#dick grayson #jason todd #bruce wayne #incorrect batfamily quotes #wally shows dick a picture of Jason when he was young and him now #corporate wants you to find the difference between these two pictures #dick: they’re the same picture #wally: No-

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red-moon10 · 8 months

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A Win for tasteful people

#jayroy #birdflash #roy harper #jason todd #wally west #dick grayson

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lustwithoutlore · 2 months

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Barbara: What did you get Dick for his birthday?

Jason: I got him a Glutemaster

Barbara: Really? Me too!

Stephanie: I also got him a Glutemaster.

Duke, gesturing to himself and Tim: Looks like we had the same idea.

Jason, sighing: Kill me. Please tell me you didn’t get Dick a Glutemaster as well.

Cass: I got him… a Glutemaster 🥰

Later-

Dick, surrounded by Glutemasters: THIS IS THE BEST BIRTHDAY EVER!!

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livingdeadvoid · 1 year

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Tim, trying to come out to everyone: I'm dating Clark's son

Damian, looking up from his tablet: I'm also dating Clark's son...

Bruce, looking between his two kids: I'm dating Clark-

Dick: Holy shit now I'm glad I'm dating just Wally

Jason: You're dating Wally? Pfft- I'm dating Roy

Stephanie: I'm dating cA-

Cass, covering her mouth: I think that's enough reveals for one day.

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mcuxhp777 · 2 months

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Bruce: I can't say I'm surprised

Jason: You knew

Bruce: First it was you with Gar, then it was Dick with Wally, then it was Tim with Kon and now, Damian's dating Jon

Tim: I don't understand, what's the point

Bruce: Every one of you attracts supers

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wolfish-chan · 3 months

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Batfam + co headcanons

- Jason dyes his hair black, but can’t seem to dye back the white streak

- His eyes use to be more brown, but after his dip in the Lazarus pit, they are a dark green

- The Al Ghul’s are similar in that aspect - Ra’s and Talia both have naturally brown eyes and Damian’s blue, but they’re now a vibrant green, reflecting the amount of time they’ve spent in the pit

- Ra’s eyes are the most unsettling, they’re the exact color of the pit water

- Damian has an accent

- Dick does too, but it’s much harder to pinpoint because of how much he’s traveled

- Damian calls Bruce ‘Baba’, but only after he disappeared. Before that it was just ‘Father’

- Tim is supposed to wear glasses, but he tends to forget them and his contacts so his mask is built to compensate. However, he is forever squinting during board meetings at Wayne Enterprises

- Jason and Bruce have the same thinking face but nobody would willingly call it out

- Alfred could definitely kill any of the rogue gallery, but he doesn’t out of respect of Bruce’s values

- Initially, Bruce would get annoyed when Tim would bring YJ into the batcave/manor, but he’s slowly begun to expect it

- He did get tired of finding Bart in his good chair though, so now he has a special one beside it (everyone knows it’s for Bart, but Bruce would rather be caught dead than admit that)

- Duke gets along really well with Bart and Wally, and Bruce feels a headache forming every time they’re together

- Cass is Wally’s favorite out of Dick’s siblings. More often than not, he talks way too fast for her to catch more than a few words, but she’s such an attentive listener that he forgets

- Stephanie and Jason aren’t allowed to be in a room together without supervision because they kept getting into fistfights (she antagonizes him as a hobby)

- When Damian needs time to think, he goes down to the barn to sit with Batcow because nobody ever checks for him there. They always assume he’s off training

- Duke brings out Damian’s childish nature in the best ways, and they’re almost as close as Damian is with Dick

- They pester each other a lot, but then fall asleep watching movies together (true brothers fr)

- The entirety of the batfam refuses to watch superhero movies because they’re “inaccurate”

- Jason and Diana have a genuine bond, and it only grows stronger when he comes back, even if she does get disappointed with his actions. She’s like the mom he never had

- Clark always says he doesn’t have favorites out of the younger generation, but it’s secretly Tim. He appreciates all that he does for Kon (Dick is still his favorite Robin tho)

- Alfred doesn’t make certain recipes anymore because they were something he used to make with Jason, and it upsets him to make them without his assistant

- Tim cannot for the life of him match his clothes, like Adam Sandler type of style

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incorrectbatfam · 3 months

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Headcanon that once someone dies and comes back to life they acquire the ability to see ghosts

Jason's first night back at the Manor, Martha points to the cupboard where his favorite snacks were stocked just like when he was a kid

Steph teaches Thomas how to play iPhone games and he is completely enthralled by the infinite number of jigsaw puzzle apps

Cass holds gala dresses up to the mirror to get Martha's opinion through a series of silent nods or head shakes

Damian shows Thomas how Bat-Cow likes to be cleaned and now the other family members will find her mysteriously groomed ahead of time

Roy gets Martha's blessing to date Jason when Bruce refuses. Wally does the same for Dick with Thomas

Kon and Bart visit the Manor, say fuck-words, break everything, and run away scared shitless Scooby-Doo style while Tim watches on confused

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armin-ocean-eyes · 4 months

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A waffle house employee

But not just any waffle house employee, one who works in Gotham City.

Them vs the joker, who's winning?

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terrywho-cartoons · 1 year

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Dick was a normal name in the 1950’s, but it’s 2022 now, so here’s how I immagine all of the batkids (+ some extras) reacting to Dick introducing himself.

BABS (10 years old)

Dick: My name’s dick

Babs: That’s a bad word.

Dick: No? It’s my name?

Babs: Daddy says it’s naughty to say bad words.

Dick: But it’s my name?

Babs: I’m gonna go ask daddy *runs up to commissioner Gordon* daddy, that kid says his name is Dick, can I say it when I’m talking about him?

Dick: *the son of immigrant parents, grown up speaking an amalgamation of Easter European dialects and was names after Dick Tracy still confused as to why his name is a bad word*

***

Jason

Dick: Hey buddy, I know this is all very new but my name is Dick and I—

Jason: hold up, hold up. Dick?

Dick: yeah, I know, I know but —

Jason: Damn and I thought my parents were assholes.

***

Tim

This little stalker already knew Dick’s entire biography, so there wasn’t a reaction, bless him.

***

Damian

He was brought up by assassins, also no particular reaction.

***

Steph

Dick: nice to meet you Stephanie, my name’s Dick.

Steph: you said Dick?

Dick: short for Richard, yes.

Steph: Nice. *nods*

***

Cass (Cass uses sign language because I said so)

Dick: *finger spells D I C K*

Cass: *there’s a sign for that*

Dick: yeah but we ain’t gonna use it, kiddo.

***

Wally (13 years old)

Dick: it’s so cool to meet other sidekicks! I’m Dick.

Wally: as in your name is Dick?

Dick: Yes *blushing because now he knows why everyone is reacting like it’s strange*

Wally: Ok from now on I’m gonna be the one to introduce you to anyone we meet, deal? Oh you’ll see man it’ll be so much fun *proceeds to list out all of the ways they could sneak dick jokes into conversations*

***

Roy

Wally: Roy, I have the pressure to introduce you to my Dick.

Roy: what the fuck do you mean now!?

Dick: *quadruple flips over Wally and lands in between them* ta-da!!!

Roy: who’s the kid?

Wally *placing an hand on Dick’s shoulder*: this, is my Dick

Roy: that’s your actual name?

Dick: it is.

Roy *looking between the other two*: ok I want in on your plans to introduce him to the others

————

This is all I could come up with but feel free to add more!!

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