#i realized with each one i kept putting them on the same sides lol thats just sorta where the vibes went | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

Visit Blog

Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.

Fun Fact

28.6 is the average number of monthly visits per US mobile user.

#i realized with each one i kept putting them on the same sides lol thats just sorta where the vibes went

oriigirii · 3 years

Text

Streamer MC headcannons with the brothers 💞

"You were quite a known face on social media back in the human realm, playing games, doing unboxings, just vibin in general, fans around the globe looked forward to your streams a lot! However, considering the sudden (unannounced) invitation to the exchange program, you had to leave all of that behind out of the blue. It wasn't as bad at first, but you have to admit you do miss the feeling of being able to do goofy shit online. Luckily for you, with the advance technology of Devildom and some spicy magic, the internet had synced with the human realm, and thats when you decided to finally re-enter the streaming scene. How will the brothers react upon seeing your peculiar past time?"

Head empty, No thoughts aside from the brothers just bothering the MC while they stream so here you go haha

Warnings: None, just crackhead energy and a lotta mispellings

Gender: Neutral!

Hotel: Trivago

* [ ಠ╭╮ಠ ] Lucifer *

{How did he know about your career?}

I honestly don't see him as someone who goes on the internet a lot

(He screams boomer to me, change my mind)

He doesn't have the time either, he's too focused on work!

So him finding out is gonna take a while

But! He did find out the hard way when shrilled screaming was heard from your room when he was passing by with some paper stacks in his arms (courtesy of Diavolo)

This man felt his instincts kick in, he ran as fast as he could, papers forgotten, and he immediately slammed your door open. Splinters scattering around, your door definitely damaged, as his eyes held a glare and his demon form was out, wings spread in a threatening display.

He was ready to beat someone's ass as he had thought someone had hurt you in here.

But all hes met with is you, infront of your chair and PC, and a game over on the screen...

To say he was unamused was an understatement cause you just lost your internet priviliges for giving him a heart attack (He said it was because you were being rowdy and noisy but with what you saw you knew that wasn't the case)

Good luck tryna puppy-eye your way to his heart to let you continue streaming lol.

If by some miracle you managed to wriggle your rights back from his hands, he'd warn you not to be so loud next time.

You already learnt your lesson though~ (Hopefully)

{How does he feel about your streams?}

Not everyone's the same, so if you were the shy soft streamer who does more art streams or something akin to a podcast, you can bet that Lucifer will be putting you on while he works, he kinda knows your streaming schedule at this point and if you were running late, he'd force one of his brothers to take over your dish washing duties or any chores you were stuck with

If you were the loud obnoxious meme type, hed still try to watch out of curiosity, and as much as he appreciates that you were getting comfortable here in Devildom with how you laugh and joke around, he still can't approve of it. Its too loud, its much like his brothers energy and he has enough of that already, so he probably doesn't watch as much.

He has countlessly came to your room to shush you and at this point your fans had made a compilation of each time Lucifer had barged in to tell you off

Look he likes it when you scream, but not when hes in the middle of work okay--

At this point, chat has deemed Lucifer as dad and you as their mom/dad.

If he ever catches wind of this he'd definitely be teasing you in private for centuries to come.

Overall fine with it, as long as don't do something stupid on stream.

* ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ Mammon*

{How did he know about your career?}

I would say he found out by him crashing into your streams midway but that's too predictable, hence why you've Mammon-proofed your bedroom during streaming hours!

Thanks to our wizard daddy, you have managed to cast a simple lock spell on your door and as well as a sound proofing

You love your broke idiot, but you did wanna keep the tone of your stream today a bit more chill, you wanted to have a proper Q&A with your fans to hopefully clear any bad vibes around your 3 month disappearance.

When Mammon has learnt your door was locked he definitely was a bit pissy, he knocked on your door loudly even and was calling out for you to let him in, but to no avail.

Bro he's scared.

He usually was allowed to enter, and you usually answered if you did need to be left alone for a bit, so just leaving him hanging got his mind racing and he had to press up his ear on the wooden door to try and hear if you were okay

When this continues on he finally resorts to getting help, but the only one in the house ws Levi, so he kicks down HIS door.

Levi boutta summon Lotan for interrupting him honestly

But as Mammon exclaim you weren't answering and he worried for your wellbeing, Levi rolls his eyes and scoffs,

"Idiot Mammon, they're streaming don't bother them…"

Streaming? why didn't you tell him???

Rude much.

He did huff and now was forcing his way to use Levi's PC for a moment

Can Levi stop him?

Nah.

He was busy on his console, and if he stood up now hed be breaking his world record so he was at a terrible state so he just resorts to threats of him drowning the Avatar of Greed if he does anything stupid on his PC.

He immediately logs in to your streaming platform and he watches for a bit,

You were more dolled up now just to look decent on stream, and he felt this jealousy rise as you interact with your chat, especially to those saying I love you's and stuff, and you even said it back? the audacity! You were his werent you? Were you replacing him with these nobodies?

He huffs as he realized that those who paid got their message highlighted, and thus, he starts donating. (Mind you this was Levi's account...)

"Mcccccc Open the dooorrr"

"Ill behave i promiseeeee"

"Cmon pleaseeee?"

Chat is c o n f u s i o n

NGL, they thought Mammon was a creepy stalker and red flags were being waved everywhere

but as chat was pondering who the hell he was, you can only sigh and look at the camera with that unamused expression, but ugh! you just KNOW hes doing that kicked puppy expression of his, and maybe it really wont be so bad

So you snap your fingers and say, "Okay MonMon, its open, Im giving you 3 seconds"

Mammon wasnt deemed to be the fastest out of his brothers for nothing

As soon as you got to '2', you were already tackled by the white haired male and chat went wild.

Now that you've shown your life in Devildom, maybe its time to introduce chat to your boyfriend no?

{How does he feel about your streams?}

You get paid to sit infront of a camera, do I have to say anything else?

But really though, as much as he enjoys the thought of getting so much cash from something so simple, he prefers the joy of being able to proudly exclaim that he was your first man!

ohhhh he thrives on the salt of your overly attached stans

but for those who fully support you, he always feels so mushy and shy when they say the ship you guys so hard

The fanarts has him WEAK (he may or may not have saved a few)

You usually do streams alone, but now you've allowed the door to be left open to let Mammon join whenever

Chat pogs when he enters with so much confidence, only for it to crumble when you kiss his cheek on stream.

Overall finds it fun to spend time with you, but just dont play scary games cause Lucifer might hang him upside down on stream.

* ▘▂▝ Leviathan*

{How did he know about your career?}

He is honestly the most attached to his D.D.D and he catches wind of almost anything going down in the internet, so your 'revival' being hyped up was something he definitely saw and he was just s wo o o ned

His Henry 2.0? a famous streamer?

Were you truly a blessing gifted upon him or was he dreaming?

He definitely didn't bring it up at first as he didn't wanna make it a big deal, but you notice hes been more in his head lately, and you have tried asking him what it was but to no avail.

You have to corner this little snake if you want answers and he eventually admits that he knew of your persona online and was incredibly shy to ask you to stream with him

He's a streamer himself afterall but maybe he doesnt stream as much as you do nor does he have as large of a following, so his intrusive thoughts attacked him and made him think that maybe since he wasnt as famous he didnt deserve to be in the same stream as you

Please tell him to join you and gib him kiss U3U

He'll absolutely m e l t

But now, as you make the announcement to your viewers and Levi to his, the internet explodes as a special collab stream was hapening between the expert gamer and avatar of envy of Devildom along with the beloved exchange student and streamer of the human realm

Your usual viewers reach between 10-15k, but as you start stream, that number boosts higher and beyond

Before streaming though, Levi was incredibly nervous, he'd picked the games for you to play that he knew you would enjoy with him, but his mind kept racing about whatthe fans thought, he didnt wanna disappoint them

But you had to remind him that whatever they say will not matter in the end as this was merely for fun, this was YOUR stream and you guys were gonna do what you want and nobody can have a say on it. (Maybe except Lucifer)

You usually talk for him with your bubbly personality, and to calm his nerves, he hs your pinky wraped around his where the camera can't see it.

Regardless, his thoughts subsided as you two delve into your stream that lasted a solid 7 hours, you definitely promised your chat that you and Levi will be doing more streams together from now on.

Once the cameras cut and yall are left alone, Both of you collapse on bed, and despite you being asleep already, Levi was just far too giddy as everything dwells on him.

Having a player 2 by his side now had never felt so intoxicating and he as just so lucky to have you.

{How does he feel about your streams?}

He obviously adores it, although some streams he wouldnt join just so he can play games on his own

He's still an introvert afterall, he needs his alone time

But he prefers that alone time with you, his Henry.

So when youre about to go stream, he kinda becomes a bit pouty, but with a simple promise of kisses (and maybe even more if youd like) he would let you go, but his attention would disappear from his game altogether.

He might just end up watching you instead

May or may not, at some point, just chat you and ask if its too late to join you

You do allow him to join you and play from the comforts of his room as both of you can simply play via internet, you give him the comfort to not turn on his mic or webcam either and you have no idea how he appreciates that.

Will definitely fight someone online when they start claiming you as theirs (-cough- stans) Please make sure it doesnt escalate to him summoning Lotan

Although the comments would often get to him, and as much as he can fight them online, he still does find himself pondering if they were true, so you need to give him a lotta lovin and reminder that he is your player 1 and no one else can ever fill that place.

------

Wow 3 brothers this time, what an improvement, anyways hope yall enjoy! I think its pretty clear who I simp for depending o nthe length of each lol, but do let me know if you guys want a part 2 for the rest of the brothers, or even the undateables!

#Obey me #obey me fanfics #obey me x reader #obey me x mc #obey me Mammon x reader #obey me Lucifer x reader #Obey me Leviathan x reader #obey me headcannons #obey me shall we date

346 notes · View notes

julie-thefatones · 3 years

Text

THERES NO ONE LIKE YOU || BILLY HARGROVE X READER||

A/N : I just wanted to thank @i-thought-i-knew-what-love-was for helping me with the idea of this story for I was having a block lol!!! Also im sorry if i didnt catch all the typos or mistakes, i tried my best lol! anyway i hope you guys like it :)

WORD COUNT: 5290

WARNINGS: 16+ (Kissing, Rude Language)

It was Summer 1985, it was unbelievably hot in Hawkins, IN this time of year.. but this year was different, it was hotter than any summer before that I could remember, so that only meant one thing.......Everybody and I do mean everybody was at the public pool. It was the only public pool in town and no on really thought or maybe they just didn't bother to get a pool of their own.

As I made my way to the pool just like every other day this summer, I felt different. I wasn't sure if it was because I did my hair different than usual, Instead of my usual half up half down action, I decided to do it to the side and crimped, it made me feel like I was in Teen Beat under the 'Your New Summer Doo' Section.... Or maybe it was my new swim suit that was all the rage this year with the coolest Neon Yellow and Hot Pink color block, sure it made me feel somewhat like a glass of strawberry lemonade but if i'm gonna be a glass of strawberry lemonade i'm gonna be the hottest glass of strawberry lemonade there is.

Well whatever, Im not going to let this strange feeling ruin my day at the pool, no way, nothing is going to ruin this day unless its an overly packed swimming pool with no room to breath...... as I walked through the gates of the public pool, I looked around, took a deep breath, and sighed "Ruined" I whispered to my self while closing my eyes. I walked over to my usual pool chair dodging kids left and right as i made my way, blocking out the parents yelling across the way for 'TOMMY STOP PUSHING YOUR BROTHER UNDERWATER!' I mean you think Tommy would know by now that when he tries to drown his younger brother, he's going to get yelled at. Taking deep breaths the whole way to my chair trying not to let anyone get to me, I laid my towel down and took my seat. I laid there for maybe 10 minutes before i heard Mrs. Fowl yelling once more "TOMMY STO-" but this time she was cut off *WHISTLE NOISE* "TOMMY! STOP DROWNING YOUR TWARP OF A BROTHER BEFORE I DROWN YOU! YOU KNOW THE RULES! YOU LITTLE DOUCHE" I heard a male voice call across the pool, I tilted my sunglasses down to see what was going down, first I saw Mrs. Fowl rolling her eyes at what the mysterious male just yelled, I scanned over to discover who this mysterious male was... He made his way down the side of the pool greeting a group of middle aged women who gawked at him. He was slowly getting closer to the Life Guard tower and thats when I realized who it was that was calling orders and greeting people across the pool...... It was Billy Hargrove, the new, but well known bad boy of Hawkins High School. Girls went Ga Ga over him, he was hot sure but I never really understood why these girls threw themselves at him, he was just a guy, I mean not to mention he was a major douche, didn't show respect to anyone he talked too, also I couldn't stand how loud his freaking car is!! like dude, not necessary, especially not necessary when its 3:00 in the morning!! did i mention he lived down the street from me. I was deep in thought, not realizing i was still staring at Billy, but now he was sitting at the top of the Life Guard tower, I didn't realize i was staring until he stared back at me and winked "Oh my gosh" I whispered to my self in embarrassment, I rolled over pushing my sunglasses back up feeling completely mortified, Maybe he would forget about it... I mean he has girls staring at him all the time.

I laid there for about 2 hours, forgetting about my slight interaction with Billy across the pool. I didn't feel bothered the last 2 hours until i felt a large presence blocking my sun, with out opening my eyes for not wanting to get out of my zen "Hey! Sasquatch, who ever you are, your mama wasn't a glass maker, so if you would kindly move out of my sun I would deeply appreciate it, thanks" I heard a cocky chuckle above me, as much i didn't want to, I opened my eyes, and there he was right above me... Billy "Ya know, its not polite to call people Sasquatch... and for your information my mom could be a glass maker... so you making assumptions .. well thats just plain rude" He said, licking his lips before continuing "But, i'm a very forgiving person so i guess ill let it pass" He said with a big cocky smile, I couldn't help but feel flustered, even though he was being so overly confident and cocky... he just had this charm about him ... but i wouldn't let him know that, I rolled my eyes in response and kept a straight expression laying still "Oh, Hey Billy.... I didn't know you worked here" I said with as little emotion as I could express "Now, I don't think that is true Y/N, I saw you checking me out earlier" He said with the same cocky but teasing tone, I scoffed "Oh please Hargrove, you wish i was checking you out" I felt him shift behind me before he answered "Ya know, usually when someone is just staring at another .. it means your checking them out" After hearing his words I tilted my sunglasses down to look at him "You flatter yourself sir" I said with a teasing smile, he scoffed and looked off and then back to me "hmmm alright Y/L/N, well my mistake" I rolled my eyes once more and pushed my glasses back up "Alright, you've blocked my sun for long enough, now move along Sasquatch" I said, back to no emotion, He chuckled "Yes Ma'am, I would hate to deprive you of your sun" He winked before walking away. I couldn't help but stare after him as he walked away..... I quickly looked away, realizing what i was doing ... What was I doing... I don't like Billy.

The next day rolled around, and I was feeling slightly more excited then usual to get ready to go to the pool. I know what you're thinking... NOO it had nothing to do with Billy... I just was excited to cool off in the water...... and lay in the sun again.... and maaaybe it had something to do with Billy, but its nothing big... I just like to give him a hard time, that is all... that. is. all.

I walked into the pool area, same as yesterday, but today I wore my red swimsuit that had little frills on the straps with a red Scrunchy to match. I laid my towel down, again like yesterday and just like clockwork I heard the same male voice as yesterday "TOMMY! DO WE HAVE TO GO THROUGH THIS EVERYDAY! NOW STOP DROWNING YOUR BROTHER SO I DON'T HAVE TO LISTEN TO YOUR MOTHERS TERRIBLY SHRILL VOICE YELL AT YOU TO STOP! IT IS LITERALLY THE WORST PART OF MY SHIFT!" I looked behind me to see Billy finish walking to his place at the Life Guard tower, I couldn't help but chuckle at Mrs. Fowl's face, mouth wide open in offense to what Billy said.

The afternoon flew by and Billy paid absolutely no mind to me, he just say on his tower and every now and then yelled at Tommy.... But other than that.. nothing. I Hate to say i was slightly disappointed, yesterdays banter was not only fun but the most entertainment i have had this summer, all my friends were away for the summer leaving me alone ... hence the coming to the pool by my self everyday. The past week went by the exact same way, I would show up to the pool looking the cutest i can look interchanging the 3 swimsuits i own, and the 3 different hairstyles i knew how to do. But nothing, he would yell at Tommy, sit and do nothing... except when he would flirt with bimbo mcBarbie or wanna be Farrah Fawcett, it made me have a pit in my stomach... not that i was jealous... absolutely not, I was just bored.

The next day, I showed up, the same way as I had been for the past week.. except today i had no expectations except to mock the plastic Phoebe Cates wanna be that would flirt with Billy endlessly today. Today I wore my red swimsuit once again, with the same matching scrunchy... I sat and prepared to be disappointed again. I sat for about 20 mins, and just like a week before.... someone was blocking my sun, I couldn't help but grow a small smile on my face, I tilted my sunglasses and looked right at mr. Billy Hargrove with his cocky smile in front of me "You're blocking my sun Sasquatch" I said with a teasing tone "Oh my apologies ma'am" he said right before walking away. Really that was it .... no banter nothing.... I sighed aloud before sinking into my chair, what was gonna do .... and as I heard Mrs. Fowl and Billy yell at Tommy, thats when it came to me.

I approached the edge of the swimming pool, took a deep breath, was i really gonna do this... just to get Billy's attention? I rolled my eyes at myself, before stepping into the pool. I carefully walked closer and closer to the middle of the pool, looking around at all the kids around me, they looked like they were having so much fun. I started to rethink my plan, I didn't want to scare any of these kids just to get a stupid guys attention... a guy i don't even like! 'this is so stupid' i thought to my self before starting my way out of the pool, but thats when i heard the most annoying high pitched laugh coming from the Life Guard tower, and thats when I saw the Bimbo Phoebe Cates wanna be standing beneath Billy at the tower, and with out thinking I went for it. I started flailing and putting my own head under water to mimic drowning "HELP! HELP!" I screamed each time i came up for breath "HELP! I NEED HELP" I continued to scream, Thats when Billy just casually climbed down from his tower like nothing was going on and walked at a normal pace over to the edge of the pool before getting in. Billy swam effortlessly to me, and before i even knew it he swooped me up into his arms bridal style, carrying me out like i weighed nothing.... as we were exiting the pool, I had to admit, the way the water dripped off his hair and down his chest, Billy Hargrove was insanely hot.... I couldn't help but just stare at him, his face was not only hot, but it was .... Beautiful .. i mean his complexion was flawless... his eyes were such a beautiful shade of blue, and his smile was brilliantly white.. and thats when i realized he was smiling at me, I slightly shook my head in order to leave the trance i was in "Wow Y/L/N, that was quite the scene you made there.... you alright?" Billy asked in his teasingly cocky tone he always had, with his big smile, I rolled my eyes "Gosh Hargrove, please excuse me for making a scene by almost dying .... how rude of me!" I scoffed, he licked his lips with a chuckle "Oh almost dying? My bad ma lady, you did in fact almost die" he glanced at the pool and then back at me "In the 4ft end of the pool" he said with a huge smile looking straight into my eyes, with embarrassment i glanced at the pool and back at him "I was not in the 4ft end! i was at least AT LEAST!!! in the 8ft end!" I exclaimed in defense to myself, I hated lying, not only did it make me feel terrible but i was bad at it!! I noticed Billy was still holding me, and I only noticed because Bimbo Barbie and Wanna be Plastic Phoebe Cates was staring at me with murder in their eyes. Billys grip tightened around my thighs and arm as he effortlessly held me "Y/N, I had to train in this pool for 5 hours everyday for week before the pool opened to get this job..... I think i know where the 4ft end is" He said to me with confidence, I was at a loss for words, I had no comeback except for "Well, they must have painted to numbers wrong on the pool" Great one Y/N, stellar... they totally painted the numbers wrong on the pool, especially since you stood just fine where you 'Drowned' .. it was totally the 8ft end ... I wanted to face palm so badly but i didn't wanna give myself away that easy, my thought was interrupted by Billys laughter "Ya know! I bet they did paint them wrong.... My bad Y/N" He said in a sarcastic tone, I rolled my eyes in response "Well Billy, Thank you for helping me ... now if you would please let me down" I said, even though I didn't mind him holding me.... it sure was fun pissing The bimbo twins off. He smiled and nodded his head and gently let me down "It was a pleasure saving you Y/N" and as he started to walk away he turned back to me "Ya know, i teach swim lessons... I could teach you a couple things" He said with a wink "Yeah! maybe! Don't want to drown again" I said while wringing out my hair "Good! wouldn't want your fellow swim team to know that you forgot how to swim over the summer" He said winking before walking away "Yeah!!! that would be embarrassing!!!" I called after him, once he was not looking my face hit the palm

hand so hard it's like they were magnets.

Before leaving, with all my pride gone anyway, I walked up to Billy "Hey!" I exclaimed up in order for him to hear me up there on the tower, He looked down at me and smiled "Oh Hey Y/N!" He responded "Billy, did you mean it?" he squinted his eyes like he couldn't understand me, I sighed "Did you mean it!!" I exclaimed a little louder, but he still squinted with confusion "Ya know! why don't you just climb up here and tell me" He exclaimed to me, I sighed and looked around "Why don't you come down here!!" I yelled back, and again he squinted, I rolled my eyes and started up the ladder "Was this really necessary Hargrove, I see you talking to the barbie twins all the time with out having them climb up here" I said exasperated, he just smiled propping him self up on his chair "Yes, but you see... Im not actually listening to them.. its the same thing every time" he says before he start " 'Oh Billy, you look so strong, please take me out for a ride sometime' 'Oh Billy, I bet you could bench me with ease' " He said in his best girl impression and then went back to his normal voice "and yadda yadda yadda, but you! if you're talking to me... it must be something worth hearing! so how can i help ya Y/N?" I couldn't help but chuckle "well, i was just wondering if you meant it, when you said you would give me swimming lessons?" I said, looking down at my hands that were clasping the edge of Billys seat to keep my balance, I could feel his eyes on me, but i refused to look at him until i heard his answer "Well, That depends.... are you asking?" He asked, with pure joy in his voice out of amusement, I mustered up my confidence to look at him "Maybe!" I said, he was smiling the largest, cockiest smile, placing his whistle in between his teeth, not breaking his eye contact with me and then *WHISTLE NOISE* "TOMMY! IM GONNA COUNT TO 3 AND IF YOU ARE STILL BEING A LITTLE DICK IM GONNA COME DOWN THERE AND TIE YOU TO A TREE ..... BET YOU WOULDN'T LIKE THAT KID!" He yelled, still not breaking contact , I again couldn't help but chuckle, he opened his mouth so slightly so that the whistle would just fall out with ease, his mouth still open he grew a sheepish smile "Yeah Y/N, It would be an honor to teach you to swim" I smiled "Good!! thanks" I said as I started to climb down the ladder "Hows 10pm tonight?" He said, and I popped back up to level with him to make sure i heard him right "Huh?" he chuckled "I said how about 10pm tonight?" I just sat there for a minute, no knowing what to say.... I would have to sneak out in order to do that but before i could stop myself i said "Yeah sure!! that works for me" He smiled even bigger "Great!! Ill see ya then Y/L/N" I started down the Ladder again "Great!!!" I exclaimed.

I ran home and did the usual, eat dinner with the family, go to my room and read whatever book i'm reading until my parents go to bed, in which i usually go to bed or sneak down to watch some TV to myself, but not tonight.... tonight i was sneaking out.... I've never snuck out before ... let alone sneak out to be with a boy.... and not only that .. the town bad boy ..... ugh! what am I doing.

As soon as I heard my parents bedroom door shut I finished prepping my hair and slipped on some shorts over my swimsuit. I ran down the stairs and snuck out the door, making sure to close the door very slowly in order to not make a sound, clicking it shut ever so slightly, as soon as it shut i sighed in relief and turned running into someone behind me causing me to scream "WHAAAA!" I screamed "Geesh Y/N!! Ya want the whole neighborhood let alone your parents to know your sneaking out" I heard Billy whisper to me as he clasped his hand over my mouth, I let out a huge breath happy it was just him and not some criminal, I licked his hand to get it off my face, he laughed before removing his hand "Excuse me Hargrove, you almost gave me a heart attack" he chuckled "You know this is your second brush with death today, I don't know if me being around you is good for your health" I smiled to myself, Oh no... You definitely are not Hargrove. I looked at him and then realized "Hey!! why are you here, i thought i was meeting you at the pool?" we continued to walk down to his car "You really think i was going to let you walk to the pool, by your self, at 10:00 at night" he said as he held the passenger door to his car open, I rolled my eyes "Im not getting in there" I said crossing my arms, he scrunched his eyebrows confused "and why not?" he asked "Because i hate your car" I said without thinking, he laughed, now leaning on his open car door, looking at me with an amused smile "Oh really? You hate my car!!! you have never been in my car, my car is offended" He said teasingly, I rolled my eyes once more "Why do you hate my car?" He asked, I sighed a big sigh "Because!! it's entirely too loud, which usually wouldn't bother me, but when its waking me up at 3:00 in the morning and i am having a really good dream... yeah that would make me hate a car." He just looks at me with disbelief before bursting into laughter "Well, we're gonna change that" he said winking at me and opening the door wider "Now please get in the car" he said gesturing to the car "No! i'm not getting in the car." I stood my ground, I was not getting in that- My thought was interrupted by strong arms scooping me off the ground and before i knew it I was in Billys arms "Billy!! what are -" he set me in the passenger seat of his car and closed the door before i could finish my sentence. Billy effortlessly swung into the driver seat and within seconds we were zooming down the street, in usual Billy fashion... I had to admit, it was exhilarating going this fast with the music blasting this loud I couldn't help but belt the lyrics along "THERES NO ONE LIKE YOUUUUUU! I CANT WAIT FOR THE NIGHTS WITH YOUU! I IMAGINE THE THE THINGS WE DOOO" I belted, Billy smiled at me in awe, I could feel the blood rush to my cheeks and Billy started belting the song, hitting his steering wheel to the music, nudging me with his elbow to join back in, so I did. We belted songs all the way to the swimming pool, it wasn't a super long drive... but it was probably the most fun I have ever had in a 5 minute drive. As we pulled up to the pool Billy turned off the car and within seconds he was at my door helping me out. "Soooo are you even allowed to be here this late?" I asked looking around for security cameras, Billy chuckled "ummm thats up for debate, but for tonight.. yes" I nodded along "Alright.... why tonight but not other nights? did you bribe the security camera guy" Billy looked at me as he unlocked the gate to the pool "Not exactly" He said with one of his famous Billy winks, I have received more winks from billy in the last 12 hours then i have received in the past year its self.... but I didn't mind. He finally got the lock undone and we walked in, out of habit i started walking toward my usual chair "Ha, where you going Y/L/N?" I stopped in my tracks and realized what i was doing, I started back to Billy, but being flustered I tripped over my feet causing me to fall right into Billys arms, I couldn't tell if he moved to come catch me or I was just falling in

his

direction and caught me... either way, I liked the feeling of his arms around me "You know, you're a real dork" He said with a chuckle, and in a moment we just stared into each others eyes, until me being me had to sneeze, I faced away and sneezed into my arm, Billy helped me gain my balance before letting go of me "ehem.... well i'm gonna get the pool cover off and then we will start the lesson" I watch as Billy hastily got the cover off, I felt bad letting him do it alone, so I started helping him, he looked up at me and laughed "What are you doing Y/L/N" He said with a chuckle, I smiled at him "What!!! I wasn't gonna let you do it by yourself!!" He just smiled at me and then shrugged as we continued to get the cover off. We were now standing in the middle of the pool "Okay, Y/L/N, let start with basics.... Floating" He said looking at me as if to say 'Come closer' "Y/N You're gonna have to get closer to me" he said smiling grabbing my hand a pulling me closer to him, I looked up and our face's weren't even an inch away with how close we were, I could feel his breath on my cheek "you're gonna want to get on your back" He said in almost a whisper, not moving from how close he was to my face, I blinked a slightly turned to look into his eyes "Excuse me?" he chuckled "To float.... you're going to want to get on your back to float" He said smiling, all of a sudden his face was gone away from mine and i felt one hand on my legs and the other on my lower back as lifted up my Legs and balanced me out ... I was now on my back floating in a pool with Billy Hargrove "Alright, Im gonna let go" he said, he actually sounded kind of nervous, which i have never heard from Billy, as i felt his hands start to move away from me I couldn't help stop my self "No" I whispered, not wanting his hands to leave from me, he smiled and moved closer "If i don't let go, you wont learn" He said, i felt his fingers lightly graze my lower back "Well, I also wont learn if you leave me on my own too soon... ill sink" I said trying have a teasing tone but it was slightly ruined by my heavy breathing, i couldn't help i was filled with all kinds of emotions right now. Billy leaned down closer to my face "Thats true, good job" He said with just as heavy breathing as me. We focused on my floating for about 15 minutes before we went on to other things, we swam all together for about an hour or so until it started to get pretty cold, I could help but shiver "You need to stop Y/L/N?" Billy asked making his way back over to me "Im just a little cold, i'm okay though" I said through chattered teeth, he chuckled and ducked lower in the water and came over to me the rest of the way "C'mon, get down here" He said pushing my shoulder so that I would be in the water as deep as him, he moved closer where his arms were now around mine, and once again our faces weren't even an inch apart "better?" he whispered, all I could do was nod my head, I really was getting warmer.... "You smell good" I said, Did i really just say that...... 'you smell good' ? really??? ugh! ... Billy laughed "Thank you, I take pride in that." he said, moving a little bit closer "As you should, smelling good is something you should take pride in" man i am one with the words, i'm surprised he is even still here, with my stellar flirting..... A week ago I didn't even like looking in Billys direction, and now..... Now i wanted nothing more then to feel him closer not only physically but personally... He was a lot different than i thought he would be. I felt him start to lean in closer to my face, I didn't know why but i back away, which made me really mad at myself.... why did I do that "Im sorry I-" as he apologized I moved back to where I was and closer, inviting him to continue what he was gonna do, he smiled and then moved in, before i knew it his lips were on mine with out thinking I started moving my lips with his, our motion so fluid, he was good at this, his hands were now on my back moving me closer, and there we were ... me and Billy Hargrove.. making out in the middle of Hawkins Public

Pool at

11:45 at night. We both pulled away by the sight of lights passing down the street, cautious of getting caught, we both looked back at each other and laughed "You're good at that" I said catching my breath, once again feeling the blood rush to my cheeks "You're very honest ya know that" he said, rubbing my back now "Ya wanna know something though.... You're good at it too" He said looking down and quickly licking his lips and then looking back up at me "How do you do that?" I asked, he scrunched his brows confused "How do i do what?" I sighed "Get me from hating you to ... to... this! in less than a week" I exclaimed in a slight whisper "Its my super power" he chuckled "Now, c'mon... I better get you home" and before I could blink his hands were off my back and he was effortlessly hopping out of the pool. totally disregarding the stairs, he held his hand out to help me out the same way "I think, Im gonna use the stairs... ya know because ... thats why they are there" I said teasingly, he rolled his eyes "But where is the fun in that" he scoffed as he walked over to the stairs to meet me, and as soon as I reached the top he had me slung over his shoulder "Aaahh!!! Billy, I know that events today may prove other wise, but I do know how to walk on my own" I said in protest "Sure! but what if i let you down and all of a sudden a eagle comes down and swoops you away and i wont be able to stop him" I rolled my eyes at his comment "The likely hood of that happening, is about as good as me winning the lottery 3 times in 2 days" I said still hanging upside down on his shoulder "Well, maybe i just like holding you" and then ladies and gentleman .... butterflies happened... oh boy.

We had a good 5 minute ride back to my house, where he held my hand, in which I tried to protest just to mess with him but inevitably gave in... I like it. When we pulled up, just like before Billy quickly got out of the car and had my door open in second, helping me out and walking me to my door with our fingers interlocked, I started for my door until i felt a tug of Billy pulling me back to him, I knew he was strong, but just one tug i was flying back to him, he had to catch me, in which our faces were once again within millimeters from each other "We gotta stop meeting like this" He said teasingly with his famous smile "I gotta tell you something" I slipped out "I know how to swim and I wasn't really drowning, I pretended to get your attention" I said entirely too fast, he chuckled "I know" I paused at what he said "You know?" I asked confused "Ya know Y/N, You are a terrible liar..... First off no one drowns in the 4ft end of a pool unless your 3, and second we may not have talked too often in school... but that doesn't mean I didn't notice you, You're the captain of the swim team, which is why i brought it up earlier today, so of course you know how to swim... I offered the swim lessons as joke.. and then you came and asked and..... I couldn't be happier you did" He said still holding me, I smiled and did a little excited hop "You noticed me?" I said a little too eager, he chuckled and looked away and then looked back "Theres no one like you Y/L/N" he said right before taking my chin lightly with his fingers and bringing me in for gentle but passionate kiss goodnight.

#Billy Hargrove #Dacre Montgomery #billy hargrove fanfiction #billy hargrove fanfic #billy hargrove x y/n #billy hargrove x reader #stranger things fanfiction #fanfic #Stranger things fic #Marys Fanfic #Marys Fic #Stranger things #🥰

142 notes · View notes

buttterknifeee · 3 years

Text

Tims S/O vs. the batfam

You, the reader, are Tim’s significant other. Congrats! you may think the hard parts over right? WRONG. you need to win over the whole ass Wayne family and heres how it goes.

Alfred

refers to you as Mx. L/N; however as you visit the manor more frequently, he begins to refer to you as Mx. Y/N

Since he refers to you as Mx. Y/N, you call him Mr. Alfred because you feel weird calling him just by his first name

No matter what first impressions you gave off to him, he never shared them due to not wanting to be impolite

you quickly realize that none of the bat fam helps with the chores, so you try to lend alfred a hand whenever possible

you try to be polite as possible around him, and he appreciates it

Dick

Is EXTREMELY protective of Tim

So when you first met him, he did the whole “you break my brother’s heart i will break your face” talk and that was TERRIFYING

Tim tells you not to worry about it, but whenever you were with Tim, you could sense Dick out of the corner of your eye, watching

However, as you spend more time around him, he sees that you’re really in love with tim and hes really in love with you

And you see that tim and dick have an amazing brotherly relationship, something you’ve never experienced yourself

One night, you tell dick that you wish that you had a brother as great as him

In that moment, he decided that he was gonna adopt you as one of his siblings and boom hes your big brother too now.

Duke

Duke being considered the newest person in the Wayne Manor, is basically your liaison, explaining all the dynamics and history of the Wayne Family/Manor

Super Charismatic, though hes clearly being observant of your every move, analyzing who you are as a person

But for the most part, he made you feel really comfortable at the manor

So the day you bought him a 1000 puzzle set was the day you basically won him over

You let him geek out about film and riddles, listening to every word he said, which was something that apparently didn’t happen often to him

Also duke straight up just third wheels you as often as he can

Jason

so basically

you were scared of jason

He was rarely at that manor, especially while you were there but when he was, he came in dragging blood or drinking alcohol

once while you were alone in one of the rooms by yourself, Jason came in, mask off, bandage on his right arm

he asked you, “so why are you dating replacement?”

“Why do you call him replacement?”

“Oh you know, because he replaced me when I died”

“oh. right.” Yeah you’re kinda stupid for that one

It takes a while for you to remember that jason is a vigilante who literally died and came back to life, and it takes him a while to remember that you’re a teenager and not a crime fighting super hero

so yeah your relationship does improve a bit

Whenever you guys get to talk, he always asks you some really deep question that throws you off guard, but you guys end up having really meaningful discussions and you get closer with him that way

Cass

you were even more scared about Cass than Jason

She just silently stared at you sometimes: didn’t even try to hide it

Like duke, she analyzed you a lot during your first meeting with her, although she did it to a more extreme: just by looking at you, she could sense your breathing, heartrate, movements; she was basically reading you soul

From this, should was able to tell just how absolutely frightened you were to meet her, so she made sure to smile to calm you down

Whenever you were alone with her you couldn’t help but feel a bit awkward; not only was there a bit of a language barrier but she was not the most talkative person, at times you just sat in silence

So you would try to do things with her rather than talking: you showed her pictures from your phone, she showed you her fighting moves, and you made conversation through facial expressions and body movements

Steph

VERY AWKWARD SHE PROBABLY HATED YOU IMMEDIATELY THE FIRST TIME YOU MET

i mean whos gonna be happy about seeing their ex’s new s/o not her nope

She kept smiling and laughing but you could see the burning hatred behind her eyes

It took a solid month before she actually talked to you

and it took another month for you to pluck up the courage to ask if she actually hated you

She looked embarrassed and admitted that she did kinda hate you in the beginning but that was solely because you were dating her ex, but she saw how good of a person you were, so she doesn’t hate you anymore

She asked if you hated her, since she kind of ignored you in the beginning

You said no, since she was so cool and you could see why Tim dated someone like her

Yeah so now you’re besties

And you often talking about Tim and his dating antics, sometimes right in front of him lol

Sometimes she would joke about stealing you from him, making sure to give you extra long hugs, and give u a kiss on the cheek just to piss Tim off >:)

Barbara

definitely looked up all your information as soon as she found out you were dating tim

Immediately went to interview mode when she met you

Asked about your future plans with tim, your job, your future college choices, your darkest fears, your median income

“... Im like 16″

Asides from that, shes pretty chill

you dont see her often, but she’s always down for a talk!

Would acted like my aunt from new jersey (in a good way)

Damian

You were super nervous about meeting him

Tim recalled events with him like he was recalling a war

So you were surprised to see a 12 year old kid being the one shooting daggers at you

“Drake brought home another guy/girl/person”

“damian shut the fuck up”

one day you catch him painting in his room

You ask him about his various paintings and he tells you his inspirations from each, going on a long rant for a solid hour

He realizes that hes been lecturing you for an hour and looked at you, blushing a bit

“Damian, you’re an amazing artist.” you say. smiling

Now Damian always tells tim that you’re too good for him, and everytime you banters with tim damian always took your side

Except when he saw you two kissing/cuddling, he would call you guys “disgusting pigs” and bolt out of the room

Bruce

ah, bruce. the final boss

You couldn’t help but feel absolutely terrified.

I mean not only is he a super mega rich business man and also like super famous but hes also BATMAN

you are also almost certain that he doesn’t know who you are despite being with tim for a few months by now

Everytime youre both in the same room he is often too busy to look up from whatever hes doing or rushing past you to go somewhere

Tim often confides in you about being the middle child in the family, meaning that sometimes people dont notice him and its really frustrating for him and for you to hear

One day u and tim are chilling in the batcave and bruce comes it and freezes when he sees the two of you

“who are y- what are you doing here-”

“oh um hello Mr. Wayne”

Bruce kinda just looked at you with a perplexed look, but that was when damian and cass walked by

“Father. Drake. Y/N” said damian, with Cassandra smilng and waving at you, to which you wave back.

“Hey Damian” you say nonchalantly. “I saw that you’re working on a new painting. youll have to tell me ALL about it later.”

“Of course. Im sure you’re aware of Georgia O’Keeffe”

You smiled and nodded, to which he gave the tiniest of a smile back as he and cass headed for the training room

Bruce just stared at you even more perplexed than before, I mean, you just made damian smile

You glanced at Tim, who seemed just as uncomfortable as you

“Oh yeah Y/N, didn’t we have that movie we were gonna watch? yeah lets go like right now.” Tim said as he pulled your arm took you out of the batcave, giving bruce the well talk later look

After that instance he talk to some of his children about you, and they had nothing but good things to say. Even Jason, who literally kills people for a living, put in a good word about you.

The next time you visited the manor, you were greeted by bruce himself, dressed up in a business suit.

“Y/N, correct?” he pulled out his large calloused covered hand and held it towards you

After a brief moment you smiled and took it

“Yeah, thats me”

91 notes · View notes

aidanfanficsforever1 · 3 years

Text

Five Hargreeves Imagine: I Missed You

summary: Emma, also known as number 8, loved five but five didn’t know even though he felt the same. Five went missing one day after a fight with their father. He returned 17 years later, only to discover Emma’s truth...

notes: i will be using the name emma because it is a beautiful name and i can see aidan or five being with an emma. just change her name to yours if you want! luv ya! it will be in lower case. some story line changes includes five seeing vanya dead, but not seeing emma...

warnings: fluff, rough kissing, sexual themes(not 100% smut, but dirty enough to mention it), angst, sadness, happiness, e.t.c

Lets begin!

emma’s POV

(17 years ago)

I was laying in bed with vanya watching five practice his space jumps. we all believed that father should allow him to time travel so we thought it’d be a good idea to take it up with at dinner. i was admiring Five’s dimples when he would smile about his accomlishments. he was so cute and supportive of my telekinesis and ability to make others listen to me because i make them fall in love with me... i know! weird but i really like five but i know he doesn’t like me so i don’t even bother.

it was dinner and five stabbed his knife into the table for fathers attention. they bickered until give looked at me and ran out the door. i tried running after him but then father threatend being thrown in the room where he put vanya in her “sickness” time. i say down ate all my food, and ran to my room. i landed on my bed and screamed into my pillow. ‘when five gets back later that night, im going to loose my mind on him for running.’ it thought, but i didn’t know he wouldn’t come back...

(17 years later)

I was sitting with my head on klaus’s lap and was drinking with him while listening to him joke about how i still look 13. i look 13 because when five left, i kept on having breakdowns to the point where i would hurt people, so father put me on this “medication” that calms me down, almost like being high, but it stunted my aging. klaus was my best friend and i loved him. we would get high when i thought about five or just because i was pissed, and it was a blast. one night we will be at a bar in the city, and then wake up on a cruise ship! shit is fun with klaus.

diego and luther were bickering until they saw me.

“hey! hows it going girl klaus!” diego yelled jokingly while picking me up and hugging me.

“ha-ha very fun shit disturber!” i said back laughing a bit tipsy.

“jesus, look at you two! you would think she’s upset about dad, but knowiing her and klaus, they are probably celebrating.” luther said as a joke but some how knowing it was a tiny bit true.

“yes sir. the old man was... whats the word... a prick. what is there not to celebrate about?” klaus said raising the vodka bottle we were sharing, tripping over his own feet with me laughing my ass of at him.

alisson walked in the room and just stared at us blankly.

“alisson! come here, come have a a drink take all that pain away!” klaus said walking over to the bar.

“yeah come have a scotch on the rocks with a twist! it’s been forever since we did that together. and we have a lot of catching up to do.” i said tipsy. allison laughed and came to have a drink. after talking with allison and after vanya showed up, i ate some whole-wheat bread and went to take a nap to sober up. i hated pogo seeing me drunk. it was like i felt like i still had to act good when im around him. pogo was always there for me, so i had to be kind and

i was sleeping and was sobered up when klaus ran into my room with a fire extinguisher, saying their was a stranger blue portal outside. i through my vanz on and not worrying about my smudged makeup, thinking it was kind of hot. after five left, i had the sudden urge to look pretty no matter where i go or whats going on. i still don’t know why but to this day, it still is happening. ‘lol’. i through a blanket over my shoulders, grabbed and umbrella, and went out side with klaus watching throw the red bottle into the portal.someone started coming out of the portal. the more they came out, the more i realized who it was... five.

fives POV

i was trying to get though the portal when i saw emma come outside from the house with klaus. ‘god she looks beautiful but why does she still look 13...’ i thought. i was finally able to get through and i fell to the ground. i stood up and realized i got the equation wrong, seeing i was 13 again too.

“shit” i said out loud with everyone staring at me.

“five?” alisson said, “what the hell just happend?” i ignored her when i saw emma.

“shut up...” i said walking towards emma. she looked at me sad and looked like she didn’t believe what was happening. i stood in front of her, and admired her. she gave a small smile.

“five? is that really you?” she said with tears welling up in her eyes.

“yeah, its really me. im so sorry emma. i love you . i loved you since we were 10 and i was so scared to say it. i love and you so much and and i shouldn’t have lef-” i got cut off by emma dropping her umbrella and blanket, and hugged me really tight. i was surprised at first but hugged back just as tight.

“i love you too” she said crying into the hug and i felt like i was going to cry too. ‘god i missed her. i think it’s time to show her how i feel...’ i thought. i pulled away and put my hand on her rosy and cold cheek. she looked into my eyes and smiled, as i did to. ‘come on five, just do it...’ i said in my head to motivate myself.

“five, i feel the same way but why did you wait t-” i cut her by attaching my lips to hers. our lips moved in sync and i felt her smile into the kiss. i smiled too. i jumped us through space to my old bedroom and pushed her against the door closing it.

“wow...” she said while pulling away. i laughed as i lifted off my shirt tie and blazer.

‘double WOW.” she said with her eyes wide open. that made me laugh again. she lifted off her hoodie and kissed me again, with me kissing back. we fell onto the bed and she was one my lap. i started kissing her neck leaving marks. she moaned and it turned me on. it turned me on even more when she stated grinding her hips on mine, causing friction. all that time in the future going through puberty with a girl i loved was hard... i groaned and i flipped us over kissing her again with her arms around my neck when someone walked into the room.

“shit! klaus” we both yelled at the same time getting off each other. emma covered her bra with the blanket.

“damn! he hasn’t even been here for 20 minutes and he’s already getting some! my man!” klaus yelled.

“GET OUT!” we yelled together at the same time again. klaus left and emma was red. i pecked her lips.

”now where were we...”

emma’s POV

me and five did something... amazing. we did it! it felt so amazing with him and i couldn’t be more happy that he is back. we were cudding while sweat beads fell from our foreheads and body’s. five inhaled and exhaled.

“what on your mind, babes?” i said while leaning my had on his shoulder.

“i missed you, you know that. everyday, i would think of you. i would think of your smile and how soft your voice was. i missed your abilities too. they were always my favorite.”

“five, i missed you too. i missed you so much, i pretty much turned into klaus. i started drinking and getting high just to stop being sad about you. and that was last week! but you need to tell me where you went. please.” five breathed in and out looking in my eyes.

“ok. i’ll tell you...” he said. i rubbed his bare chest and stomach while he told me everything. i was shocked. hearing about how the world ends. not about HOW it ends just the face that it ends is crazy. but what i can’t wrap my head around was the fats that he found EVERYONE in out family dead, but not me. i shook it off knowing that was the least of my worries at the moment.

“so, you were there for ov-”

“over 40 years. yeah. it helped that i didn’t see you dead though. i probably wouldv’e died. i can’t imagine. im so sorry for leaving you. i really did lik-LOVE you since we were 10.” he said.

“me too. and its ok. you are here now and thats all that matters...”

fives POV

“me too, and it’s ok. you are here now and thats all that matters...”

i kissed emma and we drifted to sleep.’

im so happy to be back’

#five hargreeves #aidan gallagher #the umbrella academy #five hargreeves x reader #five x reader #five fanfiction #aidan gallagher fanfiction #allison hargreeves #diego hargreeves #luther hargreeves #umbrella academy vanya #klaus hargreeves #umbrella academy pogo #umbrella academy five

21 notes · View notes

ddaengyoonmin · 5 years

Text

Neptune

Pairing: Mermaid!Taehyung x Space explorer/Scientist!Reader

Genre: Smut, Angst, Fluff

A/N: I really have nothing to say other than I took this way too far lol I hope you all enjoy it! The ending might be confusing lol send asks if you want to know anything and id love to hear what you thought!

Word count: 16k (yeah that happened)

Warnings: Oral male and female receiving, descriptions of fainting, drowning and death, guns, swearing, (I think thats it, let me know if i missed anything)

Tagging a few of you who seemed excited for this! :) @mischiefmakerliesmith5 @yeontanismypresident @oh-worm-yee-haw @kpopgirlbtssvt @zombiewerewolfqueen

Summary:

No one with legs lived on the surface of Neptune, walkers such as yourself lived on the moons. The spacecrafts that you traveled in constantly moved to and from all of the different moons, but no one ever went down to the surface. That's where the swimmers lived. You’d heard tales of the fishtailed people that swam in the great sea below the moons, some called them mermaids. But no one had ever actually seen one before, well, until now. You and the scientific research team that you had gathered together had built the first spaceship in your people’s history that could go into the waters below. You’d figured you’d snap a few pictures and return within the month, but things didn’t go as planned. Your ship was captured by the swimmers and they seemed just as in awe at you and your team as you were with them. They decided to let you go but only on the condition that you to bring their leading scientist back up to the moons with you, so you could learn from each other. You learn quite a bit from Taehyung, in particular, your anatomy seemed to be his favorite subject…

---------------------------------------

Triton was a gloomy and desolate place, but the moons of Neptune were all your people had known. There were a few large cities on each moon, each looking identical to the others, all of the buildings were tall and gray and matched the one sitting next to it. Each neighborhood’s houses looked no different from the one on either side. Original thought and creativity seemed to be scarce in your society.

Even the clothes sold in stores seemed to fall into a range of plain styles and blacks and grays.

Ships flew back and forth between the moon’s daily exchanging supplies. Some citizens worked on other moons during the week and would return to their home moon for the weekends. You were lucky to not have to travel far for your work, in fact, you lived right on the same plot of land in dorms with all the other scientists at your facility.

You were the lead researcher and developer on a new type of shuttle that could fly through space, and also dive into water. You didn’t know too much about the engineering of it all, your studies had all mostly leaned to biology and astronomy and you had dabbled in geology and physics. But, your team had been from all different sciences and studies, so, together you had found many ways to overcome the struggles of its creation.

It was a particularly difficult task, considering Triton didn’t have many places for you to test out the ship you were developing. There were no lakes or big bodies of water.

Your life’s goal, from when you were a small child had always been the same. You’d stare out your window at the giant blue planet that hung in the sky, and you’d dream of what life would be like down there.

You’d heard stories, but everyone said they were nothing but fairy tales. Your science driven brain couldn’t quite escape the idea that you wanted to prove that they were real, and figure out the mysteries of the swimmers from the stories yourself.

You knew that it could possibly all be fake, maybe the planet wasn’t even made of water and just looked like it.

Those were the types of unanswered questions that motivated you to wake up every morning and continue your work.

You had been working on the ship with your team for about 3 years, and the day had finally come to put together the finishing touches and head out on your exploration.

You weren’t surprised that it had made the news, headlines read ‘Hopeful Scientist and Her Team will Attempt to Uncover the Mysteries Bellow.’ and unfortunately prompted some like

‘Chasing Fairy Tales? The Scientist who believes in Mermaids’ that one you weren’t quite fond of. The majority of people thought it was a ridiculous idea, but you never let it crush your spirits and excitement.

--------------------------------------------------------

It was going to take about 2 days to get down to Neptune, nothing compared to a lifetime of curiosity, work and waiting.

A large crowd of excited citizens and media came to see you and your team off. You smiled and waved out one of the windows before strapping yourself into your seat. You had traveled by shuttle many times before, though the design of your shuttle was different than most of the other looked, you were used to this part of space travel.

Yet, you still felt your stomach turning into knots.

There were so many things that could go wrong once you got down to the surface of neptune. One tiny leak could risk the safety of your whole group. Or a mistake in the system that was supposed to balance the pressure within your ship when you’d dive down into the depths could cause you all to perish almost instantly.

The team that was coming with you consisted of four others besides yourself.

A photographer named Jungkook that you insisted must be included to capture all of your findings.

The aerospace engineer that did most of the designing and tests on the shuttle, Namjoon, also joined your team. Most of those who actually had worked with you up until now had been too terrified to see this through all the way, but Namjoon had been so excited to see for himself, what he considered his greatest creation, put into action.

The government who had funded your project through the grants that you had basically had to sell your soul for, insisted on your bringing a military general with your team for protection. You had argued that you couldn’t imagine what kind of help he would be underwater in a small ship. Yet Jin was forced onto your team. You didn’t quite like him, or any of the vibes he gave off, but he had actually volunteered for this. Part of you thinks there must’ve been some good pay in it for him.

The final member was the pilot/mechanic named Hoseok, he would fly the ship and be tasked with quick fixes and repairs of the ship if anything were to go wrong.

-------------------------------

Everything had gone smoothly on the take off. Next was just time to wait and prepare yourselves for what you may discover.

You and Jin had gotten off to a rocky start when it came time for dinner the first day.

He’d mostly been silent and kept to himself but when you handed him his packaged space meal, he had scoffed and waved his hand away at it.

“This is literally what you’ll be eating for the next month we are here, I’d get used to it if I were you.” You snapped at him.

He grumbled something under his breath as he caved in and took it.

“I’m sorry what was that?” You raised your eyebrows.

“I said what idiot decided to go for the bland vitamin protein packs. You know they had ones with actual food right?”

You glared down at the black haired man. He was wearing the same uniform as the rest of your team, silver sweatpants, and a black t-shirt with a silver jacket with a blue stripe up the side. His nametag on his jacket read, General of Space Military Kim Seokjin.

“Well Mr. Kim Seokjin. I’m the one who purchased it. It saved us money, we didn’t have a big budget for food here. Probably so we could pay your enormous salary for your unnecessary presence here.” you growled back.

Namjoon had stepped in as he saw Jin’s face growing red.

“It’s only the first day guys, let's keep things civil okay?” he said putting his arms up between the two of you.

You sighed and nodded. “Sorry for being unprofessional. I’m on edge today.”

Jin sulked away to eat his meal in his room.

You stayed in the small dining area with Namjoon.

“I’m just so nervous this was all for nothing. What if we get there and It's literally just empty water.” You frowned.

Namjoon put a hand on your shoulder and gave you a comforting look.

“I know, but we’ve come this far. We should stay positive, I want this to go well too”

You nodded and wrapped him into hug, “Thanks Joon”

That was the other thing about Namjoon. He was your best friend. You had met in college and realized that he shared your curiosity for the life that may be on Neptune. He’s the one who encouraged you to go for it and offered his help in constructing the ship that would take you to your dream.

You’d hooked up with him once or twice, he was actually the man you’d lose your virginity to. But, it's always remained unromantic, purely a friends with benefits deal. You never wanted a relationship to get in the way of your dream research project.

The photographer Jungkook entered the room for a moment, noticing the two of you embraced.

“Oh sorry-” he stuttered thinking he walked in on a personal moment.

“No it’s fine,” you pulled away from Namjoon and smiled. “How’s it going?”

Jungkook settler down into a chair on the other side of the small chrome dining table.

“I’m pretty excited” Jungkook spoke “Tired of black and white. Ready for some blue” he chuckled.

The reason that you had picked Jungkook’s portfolio out of the many submissions of photographers to join the expedition was for that exact reason.

Everything on Triton and the other moons were so plain and colorless. Everyone’s submissions contained basically the same types of photographs. A grey building, the grey empty landscape of Triton or Neso. Even the wildlife back on the moons were colorless. Being adapted to blend into their environment, most every animal was some shade of pale gray. One person even just had an entire portfolio of the same photographed rock. They were well done, and artistic, but nothing stood out to you.

Jungkook on the other hand, when you were presented with his portfolio, your eyes lit up, it was a series of beautiful shots of objects sitting in front of the big blue planet of neptune in the sky. It was extremely creative, and you could tell his love for the blue glow of your destination planet.

Hoseok slept in the pilot's seat with the shuttle on the autopilot course most of the next two days, only coming out of the room for meal times and to do a routine check of all of the parts of the ship he was in charge of maintaining.

You passed the time double checking the inventory of equipment you’d brought, and playing cards with Namjoon and Jungkook.

The blue planet now took up almost the entire view from the windows of your shuttle. It was magnificent and you felt every part of your body tingling with excitement.

You were set to land in a few hours, your dream was coming true.

Everyone was rushing around getting prepared. Namjoon had come up with a suggestion a few months ago to design an underwater suit, similar to what the astronauts used to be able to breathe in space, but for underwater. Though none of you planned on leaving the ship, you all would wear them while the ship was first underwater just encase something malfunctioned.

You were getting changed and geared up in your room, when your door swung open on you still half naked.

Namjoon walked in chuckling at the way you scurried to cover yourself up.

“Just me” he spoke

“Fuck that scared me” you laughed.

He walked over to you and rubbed your shoulder up and down. “You ready? I can’t believe it's finally happening. I feel like I’m going crazy with anticipation.”

“Same here. We’ve waited for this moment for longer than I can even remember.”

Hoseok’s voice rang out from over the speakers “Landing in 30 minutes. Everyone gets in their seats and buckle up”

Namjoon gave you a quick smile and a thumbs up and left you to finish getting ready.

You shakily got the rest of your suit ready, lastly putting on the helmet and making sure it was secured to the oxygen source.

As you walked out to the seats, you noticed Jin was now equipped with a gun on his hip.

“And how the fuck do you plan on using that? I will literally kill you if you shoot any holes in my ship.” You hissed at him as you sat and started to buckle up.

He rolled his eyes. “Its for if we have to go outside of the ship obviously. Its made for underwater use”

“Well here’s to hoping nothing comes to that.” you sighed.

None of you knew what you were entering into. If there were any creatures living in the water, how large were they? How dangerous were they?

-------------------------------------

The ship shook and rattled as it entered Neptune’s atmosphere, the deep blue water below looked so close that you could just reach your hand out and touch it.

You have to force yourself to keep your eyes open, not wanting to miss a moment of it.

With a giant thud that jolted all of you hard into the back of your chairs, the shuttle hit the surface of the water.

It was the smoothest landing that you could have hoped for, the ship was built for the impact.

Your shuttle now floated on top of the surface of the waters. You let out a sigh of relief, though the mission had only began, this was one of the moments you were most worried about. It was over and had been a success.

Your team cheered and clapped their hands for Hoseok and his successful piloting as you all un buckled and got out of your seats.

Hoseok turned around and smiled bowing like a performer on a stage.

Then looked to you,

“Alright boss. What now?” He asked.

You thought for a moment, you’d had a set schedule and plan, but you couldn’t help but want to take a moment to just let this sight set in.

The blue water was making your ship sway to and fro in soothing movements.

“Lets have Jungkook take some pictures” you decided. That would give all of you some time to adjust and observe as well.

Jungkook nodded excitedly and went to his trunk that stored his camera equipment, rifling through to find the best lense.

Your group now took off their helmets, feeling comfortable that nothing was going to go wrong at this point, but keeping them close on your hips just in case.

You walked over to the giant glass window that took up almost the entirety of one of the room’s walls, staring out in awe.

The sun made the water sparkle and glisten, it was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen. You heart was jumping for joy, you felt it might just jump all the way out of your chest and dive right into the water.

Namjoon walked up and stood beside you. He opened his mouth to speak but then shook his head and just looked out the window with you.

You were speechless as well. You were the first people to have ever observed this sight, it was an honor and was almost a spiritual experience.

Jungkook now stood on the other side of you, snapping pictures with a giant grin on his face. He paused and turned to you.

“Oh my god, I never want to go back” He chuckled.

---------------------------------------------------------------

After about a couple hours and all of you eating your lunch in front of the window, you decided it was time to begin your descent.

Hoseok got back in the pilot's seat, you could see him growing slightly nervous, so you walked to his side with a curious expression on your face.

“Everything okay?”

He sighed and nodded, fidgeting with some of the controls, “Yeah, I’ve done this in the simulator so many times. But, that was just a guess. I’m about to be the first pilot to shuttle underwater...Just...taking it all in”

“You’ll be famous for this” you smiled, putting a hand on his shoulder to reassure him.

He grinned widely “Yeah, We all will be huh? Thanks y/n.”

“Do we have to buckle up for this?” Jungkook asked

You shake your head “No it should be smooth and slow as we dive.”

“Awesome” he clapped his hands together “I’m gonna sit by the window and take a video of us diving then”

---------------------------------------------------

Slowly your shuttle dove down until you were surrounded by water. So far there were no signs of life anywhere, you were starting to get a little discouraged until you heard Jungkook squeal loudly.

“Hoseok stall the descent!” you shouted. Hoseok listened and the ship stilled. Your group ran over to the window where Jungkook sat with his face pressed against the window.

A small creature no bigger than your hand was slowly moving along the window. It was yellow and round, and had a large fin that wiggled back and forth as it moved.

“Jungkook pictures!” you spoke quickly. He scurried to capture the creature.

It was so strange and new.

“Hoseok how many meters down are we?” you asked

Hoseok checked a screen near his pilot’s seat. “About 30”

“Hoseok I’m a scientist...can we not do ‘about’…” you chuckled

“29.8” he replied

You quickly jotted it down into your log of events that you’d been keeping.

When you lifted your head up from your writing you let out a large gasp.

A larger creature now swam past. It seemed to be a meter long and was snake like, it was bright red with black stripes around it.

Your team pouted slightly when the creatures disappeared from view. But you were still completely giddy over the excitement of having discovered new life.

“Let's go down further” you told Hoseok and he nodded and returned to his seat.

For the next few hours you ventured further down into Neptunes depths. Your team had discovered at least 30 unique creatures that Jungkook had been able to take pictures of. You documented the depth and time at which you’d seen each of them with a quick summary of their behaviors.

“I think we should go back to the surface for a while” Hoseok suggested. “It’ll be getting dark soon and we should surface for the night”

You were slightly disappointed about that “Are you sure? Can’t we just go a little deeper?”

“Honestly, pressure wise, this is as deep as we are going to be able to go. The pressure room that the ship was tested in wasn’t capable of testing pressures any more than what we are currently at. The ship might still handle it, but we don’t know for sure. For our safety I’m going to advise against it…”

“10 more meters?” You pleaded batting your eyelashes.

“Y/n. If he says it's not safe I’m not going to allow it.” Jin hissed.

“Allow it?” you spun to face him with your jaw dropping. “I’m sorry, I thought I was in charge not you?”

“I’d think that the guy with the gun in really in charge” he smirked, putting his hand to his hip.

So that's really why he wanted the gun on him. It wasn’t just for safety from the creatures of the waters. It was to make sure that he remained in a position of authority over the rest of the crew.

You shake your head.

“You wouldn’t do that in here. Hoseok. 10 more meters” you ordered sternly.

Jin slowly stepped so that his body was almost touching your own, he stared down at you angrily.

“I said no. I’m not dying over this stupid mission”

You gulped.

“I think if we do 10 more meters I can ascend fast enough that it wouldn’t be a problem. Any malfunctions would be solvable.” Hoseok spoke calmly, wanting to relieve some of the tension and calm down the man with the gun.

Jin’s eyes narrowed “Fine. But if anything happens. I’m calling this mission and we return immediately”

“You don’t have that authority!” you yelled out.

“Actually I do.” he pulled out a government note from his pocket and shoved it in front of your face.

“You really think the government was going to just let something like this happen without being in control of it?”

The sheet read that Jin was capable of overriding any decisions you’d make. Shit.

You groaned and hit the paper away from your face.

“Fine. But I don't think anything will go wrong”

Almost like you had jinxed it, the ship lunged to the side, rolling onto an angle that caused everything not secured to slide to one side of the room and your whole team to fall over.

“Fuck!” you heard Hoseok yell out as he tried to maintain balance while messing with the controls “I can’t do anything. Our systems aren’t working”

You felt your heart rate quicken, you tried to pull yourself back up as you stared wide eyed at Namjoon who had the same look of fear and surprise on his face.

Almost as soon as your team had regained their footing, it happened a second time.

This was not good…

“What the fuck is happening!” you screeched, pulling yourself over to the windows and looking around, not seeing anything but the darkening waters.

Your ship seemed to be...moving?

“Y/n...we have a big problem here” Hoseok’s voice trembled “We’re descending...fast…”

You felt yourself growing faint, had you just doomed every soul on this shuttle with your grand dreams and ideas?

Your eyes were fluttering shut as you fell to the side, you could hear Jungkook crying. And you swore you heard Namjoon throw up right before your consciousness slipped away from you.

-------------------------------------------------

When your eyes started to open, you expected nothingness. Maybe you were still dreaming, because everything was bright. A warm yellow glow touched everything in the room. The room was a mess, Jungkook’s camera equipment scattered across the floor along with all of the notebooks and papers you’d been writing in. A coffee cup had spilled over and a giant puddle was surrounding the floor next to Hoseok who was lying unconscious.

Jungkook who was lying flat on his back had also not yet come to. Namjoon who was next to you seemed to be just waking up same as you. And Jin was nowhere in sight.

Your gaze followed the light up to the windows, it seemed you were still underwater, yet this looked like...a city? It was colorful and magnificent with sea life floating around everywhere. Your ship appeared to be landed on the steps of a very tall and heavily decorated stone building that had large colorful shells all around it.

What the hell?

You gasped and stood too quickly almost falling back over.

Have you found them?

You almost screamed out when a figure appeared in front of the window.

It looked like an adult man, in your human years he’d probably be in his 20’s, he was shirtless so you could see how muscular he was. He was the most beautiful thing you’d ever seen in your life. His skin seemed to have an iridescent glow glossed over every inch of himself.

Your eyes trailed down and you now noticed that his lower half, was definitely not human. Just below his waist, his skin stopped, and a navy blue scaling that you’d seen on some of the sea creatures you’d observed was on him. It bound his legs together into one long form, and where feet would usually be on a person was a translucent, large, tail that also had similarities to some of the smaller sea creatures you’d seen.

He had long flowing blue hair that floated in the water as he moved along the glass, peering in at you.

You really had found them, they were real.

As terrified as you were, you couldn’t help but feel a little excited too.

You’d been laughed at for wanting to install an underwater speaker system to your ship, but you now thanked yourself for that.

You shakily made your way to the control panel and picked up the corded microphone, holding down the button and pausing a moment to debate on what your first words should be?

‘We come in peace?’ ‘Hi?’ Shit. You’d always thought about what you’d say to a mermaid if you’d ever met one, but all of that seemed to have been lost to the nervousness that you felt.

The fish man saw that you had noticed him and was now floating right in your line of view, cocking his head to the side while he looked you over.

You cleared your throat and spoke into the microphone

“We are friends. Explorers” You spoke slowly, pointing to the others on your ship. Not even knowing if he’d understand you. He mouthed something back, you realize that he must be speaking. Shit, you’d forgotten to turn the receiving microphone on.

Your fingers fumbled over the control panel and you found the red button, pressing it so it now glowed ‘on’

“Sorry, what did you say?” you spoke into your mic, still not sure whether anything you were saying was getting across.

“I spoke, we are no friends. Your warrior injure one citizens. We have now”

You gasped. He spoke your language! Not perfectly but it was more than enough to have a conversation with him. How that was possible was a discussion for another time. As you realize now, that he was referring to the missing Jin. He must’ve left the ship to investigate and shot at one of them.

“I apologize for our…” you thought over if you should just use the word he used and decided that was best, “For our warrior. I’m sure he was just scared. Is your citizen going to be okay?”

The merman pressed his forehead to the glass looking around the room you were in.

“Will be okay. Getting medical care now they are. You have more weapon?” The merman suddenly seemed to get spooked and quickly turned around and swam a few feet from the ship, still looking in at you but hovering further back.

You realized Namjoon had just walked over to your side.

“W-what…” Namjoon gasped out “They are real? Oh my god they are real!” he grinned.

“They are real, and Jin shot one of them” you whispered in a hiss “They captured him. And us.”

Namjoon looked around the room realizing Jin was indeed missing.

“That idiot” he shook his head.

“Another friend” you spoke into the mic at the merman “No weapons. Our warrior had the only weapon”

The merman swam back over to the glass and looked unconvinced. “Don’t trust…” he muttered.

“Why here?” he spoke louder now

“We came to see you. To learn. Not to hurt. I’m very sorry about that. He isn’t a friend” you decided to just throw Jin under the bus with that, in hopes that the man would trust you better.

“Not friend?” he thought a moment. “Learn…”

“Yes, we came from the moons” you pointed up “We came to learn about this planet”

“We learn too” the man nodded “We like learn. We want learn”

“Awesome, well maybe we can learn some things from each other for a while before we leave” you threw in “We do need our warrior back, or we will be in trouble with our government”

“You said not friend?” He looked confused.

“Right, but we still can’t return without him” You told him.

“You don’t return” the merman crossed his muscular tan arms over his chest. “We don’t let return” he sternly spoke.

“Woah” a voice came from behind you. You realized Jungkook was now awake and approaching the glass with his camera in hand held up towards the merman

“Jungkook wait” you spoke to late.

“Weapon!” the merman yelled and hissed, pulling himself back from the glass, his hair now stood straight up as he bared his teeth growling animalistically at Jungkook. You noticed he had pointed teeth, every one of them sharp.

“Wait wait!” you waved your hands “It’s not a weapon, see”

You stood in front of Jungkook’s camera. “Take a picture of me Kook” you whispered.

Jungkook was now shaky after the behavior of the merman, but he nodded and held up his camera.

The merman got close to the glass again pressing his face against it with wide eyes as Jungkook took a picture of you.

“Can I?” you held your hand out to Jungkook asking for the camera. He shrugged and handed it over to you.

You pulled up the picture that was taken and brought the camera to the glass to show the merman.

“Picture” you told him “See. That's what he was doing.” you smiled, trying to show the merman you were being friendly.

He nodded slowly and repeated “Picture..”

Suddenly he was pulling himself away from the glass and swimming away quickly. He was gone.

Hoseok was now standing up and holding his head that had a slight bump on it.

“What the hell is going on” he groaned.

You filled him in on everything that had occurred.

“For real?” he gasped out. “But, they won’t let us leave...What are we going to do? We will definitely run out of breathable air if we don't recharge at the surface in about a day and a half…” he said looking at some of the gauges on the control panel.

You sighed. “Yeah, we need to figure out how to convince them to let us leave. Is there any contact to Triton available right now?” you asked.

Hoseok tried the radio then shook his head.

A knocking noise against the glass made you jump. You turned to see the merman was back, his mouth turned up in a smile.

“Hello” he spoke

“Welcome back” you chuckled, growing quite fond of his cute smile.

“Make deal.”

“You want to make a deal? To let us leave?”

“Yes. Deal.” he nodded.

“Okay…” you looked to Namjoon who shrugged “What’s the deal?”

“We keep warrior. For learn” the merman spoke

You shake your head “You can’t keep him...He’ll die soon if you don’t let him come with us. He can’t breathe down here, there isn’t enough air in his tank to last him. You won't be able to learn much from him dead.” You informed him.

The merman looked upset. “No deal?” he seemed to be pouting, which you shouldn’t be finding so cute considering it seemed this was the creature that held your fate in his hands currently.

“I make new deal. Must ask first.” he then turned and swam away like he did before.

“I say just leave the asshole.” Namjoon laughed.

“This isn’t funny!” Hoseok snapped. “But, yeah, why didn’t we just leave him”

“First of all, I don’t want that on my conscience for the rest of my life. And secondly, do you really think we won’t be in huge trouble if we return without him. He works for the governent”

“True” Namjoon sighed, “But if it comes to all of us dying...don’t you think that…”

The merman was now knocking at the glass again, snapping the attention of the four of you back to the window.

“New deal” The merman looked even more excited. “We give back. You take”

You didn’t quite understand what he was saying, he seemed to notice your confused expression.

“You take” he repeated pointing to himself.

“Take you with us?” you gasped. He wanted to come back to Triton with you?

“For learn. Want learn. You take. Me learn, you learn. Deal?”

“Deal!” you exclaimed instantly, realizing you should probably discuss it with your teammates but the idea of being able to take this merman back to Triton with you, and being able to learn everything about him and his kind seemed even more like a dream come true than anything that had happened so far.

“Right?” you turned to the rest of your crew

They all shrugged and nodded

“I don’t see why not” Namjoon spoke, but there was a hint of something uneasy in his voice.

-------------------------------------------------

A few more mer-people swam over to your ship after the merman you’d been speaking with went and told them that the deal was on. Two of them had Jin in their arms who seemed to be squirming around and resisting until he realized he was being brought back to his ship.

There was a small metal room in the back of the ship meant for coming and going that drained the water once Jin was inside.

Hoseok went to grab him and brought him to his room. Yelling at him for being stupid the whole way there.

The merman you’d spoken to was now in front of the glass again.

“Gave back. You take now?” he pointed to himself.

“Yes. But, how are you going to breathe? We don’t have anything water here for you.”

He thought for a moment, putting his hand to his chin.

“One night. I return” he swam away, and the other mer-people followed.

-----------------------------------------

You spent the rest of the night discussing with the rest of your crew how you’d handle bringing the merman back with you to triton.

You’d all settled on keeping it a secret.

You knew Jin would have a hard time not telling his boss’s in the government so you’d brought him out to have a little talk.

He was still quite shaken up from the days events when hoseok dragged him from his room to the main room where you all had gathered.

“The merman is coming with us back home. I want to learn from him, but I don’t think it’s best if the media knows he’s there. everyone would want pictures and interviews and it’d all get in the way of our research. Can you keep it a secret?” You asked Jin

“And why would I protect any of them? Do you even know what they did to me in there?” He growled

“You did shoot one of their people…” Jungkook spoke hesitantly

“Well she snuck up on me. And what was I supposed to do?” Jin scowled down towards the floor.

“Please Jin. I’m begging you. You can report it to your supervisors only or whatever after we’ve taken him back here” you begged. You knew that if it was found out your team had brought a real mermaid back with them the media would swarm. You also were scared of what the government would ask to be done with him, they could easily take him from your team and give him to a different scientist for who knows what…

“I don’t want to lie about this…” Jin grumbled.

“We could’ve just left you there with them man. That was the original deal, and she turned it down.” Namjoon snapped at Jin, narrowing his eyes and clenching his fists at the man’s stubbornness to get on board with your plan.

Jin sighed and rubbed his temples.

“Fine.” he whispered “I won’t tell…”

You hoped that he was telling the truth.

---------------------------------------

The next morning you were awakened to a tapping on the window. You had slept in the control room where you had seen the merman before so that you wouldn’t miss his return.

You lifted your head sleepily and looked to the noise, smiling widely upon seeing that the merman had his face pressed to the glass looking in at you.

You quickly stood and fumbled around to grab the microphone and turn on the receiving one for the outside.

“Hey, welcome back!” you chimed excitedly.

You noticed the merman seemed just as excited as yourself. His long blue hair floating just as beautifully in the water as you had remembered it. His skin was shimmering in the light, with that shiny iridescent glow covering his gorgeous caramel skin.

Your breathing quickened at the sight of him, it was almost like looking at a statue of an ancient god. You felt slightly unworthy in his presence, yet he looked more excited to see you than anyone ever had in your whole life.

“I come back. Go with you now. Made way to travel with.” he spoke. And as he said that, a group of four other merpeople swam up carrying a large glass tank that looked plenty big enough for the merman to comfortably fit into.

“That's perfect!” you clapped your hands together. “So what you’ll want to do is be in the tank when you get into the room. The room will drain out the rest of the water, but the water in your tank will stay and we can carry you in”

He nodded. You saw an older couple, a merman and merwoman approach him and hugged him tightly.

“Careful you” The woman said kissing him on the forehead.

You assumed those must be his parents. Their family dynamics seemed to be similar to your people. Those were the types of things you couldn’t wait to learn about, you had so many questions.

You pressed the button to open the door to the chamber Taehyung would enter from. He swam into his tank and you watched the merpeople swim it over and place it inside.

“All good?” you said over the microphone to the outside of the ship.

“Good. Ready” A voice called back to you

You took a deep breath. Nervously you pressed the button to close the doors and drain the water from the room.

You then called over the announcement speaker system, realizing you should’ve probably done this first,

“Everyone, I’m gonna need your help carrying him in. He’s here”

You made your way to the room, Namjoon had joined up with you and you saw a sleepy Hoseok and Jungkook following close behind.

“Jin’s not up?” you raised an eyebrow to Namjoon.

He shrugged and you sighed. Oh well, the four of you could probably do this on your own.

You felt your skin tingling with the excitement of what lay behind the door you now stood in front of.

Your childhood dreams and fantasies within your reach.

You shakily placed your hand on the door and turned the handle to open it.

When you entered the room the merman was sitting with his head, arms and shoulders all out of the tank. His head resting cutely on his hands at the edge of his tank.

“Hello” he spoke. His voice sounded a bit different when not distorted by the water. It was deep and soothing and made you just want to melt on the spot.

“Hello” you returned. “This is Namjoon, Jungkook, and Hoseok. And I’m y/n” you pointed to them respectively.

“Taehyung” he pointed to himself.

“Nice to meet you Taehyung” you approached him holding your hand out to shake his hand. He looked curiously at you and you realized that was probably not a gesture that he understood.

“Oh. Sorry. It’s what humans do to greet each other. We shake hands”

“Shake hands to greet.” He nodded like he was making a mental note of it.

“So we’re going to carry you out of here now, I’ve made space in my room to put your tank and secure it so it doesn’t slide around the ship when we take off.” You did now notice that the tank didn’t have a lid, you hoped that the trip back to Triton wouldn’t make the water spill out, you’d have to come up with something for that…

The four of you picked up the tank, noticing that it had handles to carry it, you were extremely thankful for that convenience. It was quite heavy, about four feet high, and six feet in length. You wondered if he’d start to miss swimming in the open waters. You’d have to build a bigger tank for him back at your lab.

“We make last night” Taehyung proudly tapped the glass on his tank as you carried him.

“You made this in a night? It’s nice, the handles helped” You complimented him sweetly.

So they have the means to make things like this. And very quickly. You were going to have to ask more about that.

Once he was set down and secured in your room, you let out a small chuckle at the way he looked around wide eyed at all of your things.

Hoseok and Jungkook had decided to go get something to eat.

“Want me to stay?” Namjoon asked “For safety?” he whispered the last part in your ear. Not being able to tear his eyes from the sharp teeth showing as Taehyung smiled.

“He seems gentle, you can go eat. I want to just take some notes and talk with him for a while”

Namjoon nodded and left the two of you alone in the room.

You sat down on your bed, which was only a few feet from where his tank sat.

He rested his chin on his arms at the top of the glass, looking at you with a cute and curious stare.

“I have so many questions I don’t even know where to start” you chuckled, feeling slightly shy now that you were alone with him.

“I have question too. Many” he laughed lightly, he didn’t seem to be nervous about this at all. If he was he was doing a good job not showing it.

Your mind raced through all of your questions, wondering what to ask first as you pulled out a pen and your research notebook. Writing at the top

‘Taehyung, Mermaid Research Notes’

“So, did you know that we existed?” You asked him

Taehyung thought for a moment. “Little know.” he answered “See your ships move in sky? Not know what look like. Or why ships”

You wrote down his answer in your notes. So they could see your ships going from moon to moon.

“So you go to the surface of the water, you can breath like we do it seems. Like right now you’re out of the water and seem to be fine?”

He nodded “Breath is both. Tail need water or maybe die. Have question? You say two, not fair, take turn” he winked at you in what almost seemed like a flirtatious gesture, your cheeks grew hot and you wanted to cover your face in embarrassment.

“Sorry. We’ll take turns” you smiled nervously at him.

“Good. I ask, You say warrior would die under water. Not breath underwater?” He furrowed his brow as he asked.

“No, we have to hold our breath if we go underwater, and that can only last for like a minute or two.”

“Oh. Interesting” Taehyung’s eyes widened as he nodded again. “I ask again?” he cocked his head to the side.

You chuckled at his gesture “Yeah, I got two so you should get two”

“We speak same. You know Why?”

“Actually I was wondering that too!” You put a hand to your face as you thought “ I really have no idea though. It seems you speak our language, just in a more…” you didn’t want to offend him so you tried to think of a way to phrase your thoughts. “With less words?”

“Less words. Yes. You speak extra words”

Extra words, you found that an amusing way to put it.

“Maybe at one point in life, a long time ago our people lived together somehow.” you guessed “I don’t know for sure, but we had heard of you. It was all supposed to be just a story that you’d tell children, and no one really believed it. But I actually had hoped it was true, and that’s the main reason that we came to your planet. I wanted to find out if you were real” you told him.

“Maybe.” he nodded as he agreed with your guess, yet something strange flickered over his dark eyes. He suddenly dunked his head under the water and surfaced again. It seemed random, you wondered if he was just missing the feeling.

“Don’t like dry hair. Feeling weird” he told you, as if he knew what you were thinking.

“Oh okay” you nodded. “Um...so my turn?” you still were feeling shy and awkward around him. His beauty was enough to make you nervous alone, let alone the fact that he was the embodiment of a life long dream achieved. You wanted to make every second with him count.

The door to your room swung open, causing Taehyung to jump slightly and splash a bit in the water.

“Hey. Just brought you some food and wanted to check in” Namjoon spoke, handing you one of the protein packs and looking Taehyung over skeptically.

“Thanks Joon. We’re doing well. Just talking” you smiled at him

“Okay, just radio me if you need anything.” his eyes not leaving the merman in the room “Hoseok is going to start the ascent to the surface soon” he let you know.

You gave him a quick smile and a wave as he left the room. You had expected him to be far more excited about all of this, it was his dream as well, yet something seemed to be bothering him.

“Not like me” Taehyung said after Namjoon had shut the door. He said it as if it was a fact and not a question.

“I’m sure that's not true. He’s wanted to meet your people too. He might just be nervous”

You were almost trying to convince yourself that was the case.

You felt the ship jolt forward a little bit, a small creaking sound rang out as the ship complained from having been still for so long. Taehyung's water shook slightly in his tank and he looked scared.

“It’s just the ship moving up to the surface” You told him “Its safe”

He smiled slightly “Okay. Safe” he nodded “Trust”

The two of you exchanged questions back and forth the whole way to the surface. You found out that he was also a scientist, that they seemed to have most of the same careers that your society had. Doctors, teachers, store owners, construction. Even one job that was basically a veterinarian, they liked to keep some types of fish and aquatic animals as pets.

Once you reached the surface of the water and it was time to take back off into space, you had to say goodbye to Taehyung and go sit buckled into your seat. You had made a makeshift lid, hoping it was enough to keep him safe and his water in the tank.

Right before you put it on, he could see your worried expression and he reached out his hand to you, taking your hand in his own. He brushed his thumb along your palm, sending a shudder throughout your body.

“Safe. Trust” He spoke, his dark eyes sparkling as they met yours.

-------------------------------------------------

When your shuttle arived back to Triton, your crew was met with cheers and camera crews everywhere. The large crowd gathered at the station were excited that you had all returned safely, and you were sure they were dying to hear all about it.

Your team went out to the steps where you could address the crowd. You told them that your team would be releasing the pictures and notes that you’d taken on your trip within the week. That seemed to satisfy their hunger for curiosity.

Really all you could think about though, was getting Taehyung safely into your lab without him being seen.

You had discussed with Hoseok plans to dock the ship in the back entrance after waving away the crowd, so now it was time to do just that.

Jin had left to go update his higher ups on what had happened on the trip. You nervously hoped he’d keep his word about what had really happened down on neptune.

Hoseok, Namjoon and Jungkook helped you carry Taeyhung’s tank from where the ship was now discreetly docked in the lab.

You were happy to see that he was already from the landing.

“Nice see you again y/n” he purred out as he saw you. Namjoon rolled his eyes and sighed, you still didn’t quite understand what had him so upset about this whole thing.

Once Taehyung was brought to one of the rooms in the lab that only you and Namjoon had access to you thanked Hoseok and Jungkook and told them they could go.

“That was a hell of a trip boss” Jungkook grinned at you “These pictures we took really are going to make me the top photographer on all of the moons.”

“Just remember not to publish any of the ones of Taehyung or the other merpeople. Also the ones I selected to be exclusively for my research papers I will be posting”

“Right” he nodded giving you a small wave as he left the room.

Hoseok then stepped forward towards you.

“Hey let me know when you need me for the return alright? You have my number” he put a hand on your shoulder.

“Will do, seriously thank you for everything. I couldn’t have done this without you”

“I know” he winked and gave you finger guns as he walked backwards out of the room.

Taehyung had been watching you say your goodbyes silently under water, tiny bubbles ascending to the surface of the tank. He seemed to be anxious to get your attention back over to him again.

You gave him a small smile and put your finger up to say ‘just wait one second’

You still had to say goodbye to Namjoon, who stood scowling at Taehyung.

You realized you needed to have this conversation in private and motioned for Namjoon to join you right outside the door to Taehyung's room.

“So what’s going on with you? I thought you’d be excited that we finally found merpeople? This was our dream remember?” You narrowed your eyes at him, biting on your lower lip.

Namjoon crossed his arms across his broad chest.

“Yeah, this was our dream. Our, dream. But you seem to want to do this all on your own.” He glared at you

“On my own? I’m sorry but you were right there with me? You came on this trip too, I didn’t leave you out of anything” you hissed in a whisper

“Yeah. Okay. Well have fun with your new best friend. And your research papers. Don’t bother putting my name on them. If you even planned on it” he growled and stomped away from you.

“Namjoon wait!” You yelled after him. “What the hell” you mutter to yourself shaking your head angrily as you walked back into the room where Taehyung was waiting for you.

He had an expression of confusion laid on his features.

He was poking only the top of his head out of the water, just his eyes peeking above.

“Sorry about that. I really don’t know why he thinks-“ you stopped yourself, not wanting to rant about your problems to this man you’d just met. “Never mind” you sighed.

Taehyung cocked his head to the side. “Okay?” he pointed to you.

“Yeah I’m okay” you faked a smile.

“Lie” he shook his head, “Alright, don’t tell.” he seemed to pout slightly.

“It’s nothing really. Namjoon is upset, but he’ll get over it”

Taheyung pulled himself up to rest his arms on the top of the tank. “Hope.” he nodded slowly “Don’t like you sad” he frowned and reached a hand out to you.

You purse your lips, debating whether to step into his touch. Deciding that it couldn’t hurt.

You reached your hand out to him as you walked forward. He took your hand gently in both of his and turned it over, brushing fingers lightly over your palm and staring at it inquisitively, his gaze flickering from your hand to your confused face every once in a while. His hands were cold, and seemed to glitter in the light, they were so beautiful, wet and soft as they touched you. You shuddered slightly.

After what felt like hours of him doing this he gave you your hand back.

His eyes were locked on to yours and you awkwardly wiped your hand on your pants.

“So I still have so much more I want to know about you” You spoke

“Same” he nodded “Many question”

“I’ll start?” you chuckled as you pulled up a chrome metal chair to the side of his tank, taking out your notebook.

“So,” you cleared your throat “What are relationships like there?”

“Relationship?” Taehyung furrowed his brow.

“Yeah, like do you get married?”

“Not married” He spoke slowly pointing to himself “But, yes married happens.”

“Oh, okay so you aren’t, but that's a normal thing”

He nodded. “You?”

You chuckled “No, I’m not, but we do here too”

He seemed relieved at your answer.

“Turn?” he pointed to himself.

“Yeah, go ahead”

“How do…” he smirked slightly, his tail flicking some water up in the air that fell right back down into the tank. “How do you, create new people”

You choked on air at his question. As a scientist you shouldn’t feel uncomfortable talking about these things, but for some reason discussing sex with him seemed more intimate than it should.

“Oh, I-” you shook your head, trying to shake away the embarassement, “Sex is, um. Men have an…” you wanted to try and say this like a mature professional as best you could “an appendage, their genitalia, and they enter the woman’s, entrance...that fits the man’s appendage inside and releases sperm that combines with an egg to create a baby” you coughed, still feeling uncomfortable and shy.

He nodded understandingly. “Us different. Not enter. Female release, then male release, combines outside in water to an egg where young grows”

“Oh!” you found that interesting and quickly jotted it down in your notes.

You talked back and forth a bit more with him explaining further and asking more questions as well.

“I did have one more question before I turn in for the night…”

Taehyung smiled at you, nodding for you to go ahead.

“You said that you can’t leave the water or you’ll dry up. Has that happened before?”

Taheyung thought hard for a moment “Only told. Only a story. No dry to test theory. Only water at home. Wanted to create raft to test theory, no one willing. Much risk.” he seemed to be thinking hard on this thought. “Always wondered…”

You wrote down a few more notes on your paper, then flipped your notebook shut.

“I think that’ll be it for the night” You smiled at him “I’m going to look into getting you a bigger tank, will you be fine sleeping here for the night?” you asked

“Yes, fine. Sleep good” he smiled, holding his hand out again to you. You put your hand into his and he gave you a quick squeeze “Will miss…” he murmured almost inaudibly.

---------------------------------------

The rest of the night you tossed and turned in the sheets. Taehyung was on your mind the whole time.

When you finally drifted off to sleep, the world you were sent to was familiar but not your own.

You felt yourself falling down slowly through dark water, a small light in the distance was getting closer and closer as you sank.

You didn’t feel like you were drowning, you felt serene and weightless. The light was now almost to you, nothing else was visible in the pitch black water, and you were starting to make out the object giving off the warm yellow glow.

It was a lamp, somehow still lit underwater, and a hand was holding tightly to it.

Soon you recognized the face that owned that hand. It was Taehyung. His tanned skin glowing against

You smiled and opened your mouth to greet him, when suddenly his face was mere inches from your own.

His razor sharp teeth were bared and your blood froze. You felt your entire body start to clench up with fear, a shock running down your spine at the monstrous sight of this man.

His hand shot out and gripped you around your throat. He screamed something but for some reason you couldn’t make out the words, maybe it was a different language?

Your eyes shot open and you were sitting straight up in bed, gasping and sweating. What the hell was that dream about?

---------------------------------------------

After eating breakfast, showering and getting dressed for the day, you made your way over to your lab. Excited to see Taehyung again despite the dream still slightly haunting your mind.

As you opened the door, starting to step into his room, you called out for him in a singsong voice “I’m baaaack”

Only to drop everything you are holding in your hands in shock. Your heart seemed to sink all the way to your feet and fall to the floor with your notebook and coffee that now was spilling across the tile on the ground.

He was...gone. He just wasn’t there.

No, this isn’t possible! Who got to him? Did Jin lie? Did he tell his supervisors and they came and took him to a different lab so they could steal away your credit and research?

Catching you completely off guard and making you almost jump straight out of your skin, a hand touched your shoulder from behind.

You almost turned around to punch the attached person in the face, when he spoke.

“No! Sorry. Accident scare”

You knew that voice.

You whipped yourself around to see that standing behind you was a completely naked Taehyung. Standing. Behind you. On LEGS.

Your eyes scanned over him, his tail gone and his lower half of his body now matching the humanness of his upper half. You also took note of the fact that the iridescent glow that usually blanketed over every inch of his skin was also gone. He looked completely human.

“W-what…” you stammered out, your eyes flickering up and down his body.

“Y/n. Experiment, success!” He clapped his hands together and motioned to himself up and down, as if you weren’t already looking him over obsessively.

“Tried out of water. Thought you save if went wrong” he shrugged “Look! Like you now. Strange.” he grinned excitedly.

“Taehyung. I don’t understand...I thought you were sure you’d die out of the water”

“Scientist?” he pointed to himself “Never sure without facts. Want see for self. Much surprise” he chuckled. You now noticed he was absentmindedly playing with the new body part he had discovered between his legs.

Your breath caught in your throat and you quickly pulled your eyes away from what he was doing. Your eyes had lingered a bit too long already. Enough that you’d realized how impressive his cock was.

“I-I, need to get you some clothes” you muttered, now facing away from him.

“Oh” he spoke quietly “Yes, you people clothes here” he laughed lightly.

You hurried out of the room and grabbed a spare lab coat, then went to Namjoon’s locker in the breakroom to find that he thankfully had some spare basketball shorts left there.

You brought them back to Taehyung and turned your back to him while he dressed.

“Feel weird” Taehyung muttered. “Don’t like dry”

You spun back around to face him. It wasn’t the most stylish attire but at least he was covered now and you could speak to him without feeling a warmth building between your legs at the mouth watering sight of his naked form.

“I don’t understand how this happened” you whispered.

“Same” he took a seat in one of the metal chairs in the room, lifting his legs up and down and kicking them around, rolling his ankles while he stared at his feet.

“Toes?” he asked cocking his head to the side as he wiggled his newfound appengages.

“Yeah” you giggled “How’d you know what they were called?”

Taehyung stood up and walked over to the desk in the corner of the room where you now saw a bunch of opened books laying out. One being an anatomy book.

“Oh, woah you’ve had a long night huh?”

Taehyung smiled and nodded.

“I learned much”

Suddenly he was walking over to you, you felt your breathing break it’s steady pace as he reached his hand out to rest on your shoulder.

“Haven’t learned enough...explain? Something wrong happening” his expressed was shifting into one of confusion and worry.

“I-I don’t quite understand what you mean?” you stammered out, hoping that he doesn’t realize how much his closeness was making you nervous. The way his eyes trailed over you was sinful and you were trying to convince yourself that it wasn’t what you thought it was. But, his eyes seemed to be hungrily taking you in, and now his hand was sliding down from your shoulder, fingers trailing lightly down your arm as he did. It slightly tickled and made you shudder, which he definitely noticed. Yet he still seemed concerned about something.

Once his hand reached your own he took it and slowly guided you forward. He placed your hand over his crotch, which you felt harden even more than it most likely already was under your touch. It was his turn to shudder.

“Why is this?” he muttered.

“Um…” you tried to speak but your mind was taken over by the fact that he was holding your hand to his dick currently. You didn’t want to feel as turned on as you did, you wanted to keep this professional. But you felt yourself growing warm and wet between your legs.

“It's what happens when men are turned on” you murmured

“What turned on?” he was still confused.

“It’s nothing bad. It means…” you wanted to find the right words to communicate this. He seemed to understand most things you said even if he didn’t know the words, why couldn’t he get this one, you groaned silently in your mind.

“It means you want to mate?” you tried.

“Mate?” He suddenly smiled, “Ah yes. Understand now. Yes want that.” he nodded, your heart skipping a beat as his lustful gaze was now admitted to be something real and not an idea you were creating just to flatter yourself.

“Taehyung you know we shouldn’t right? We are just here to learn-”

Taehyung cut you off with his other hand bringing a finger to your lips. He brushed over your bottom lip delicately, his eyes staring into your own so intensely that you swore he was staring into your soul.

“Want to learn human body, help?” his voice was innocent but his expression and body language was anything but. He was still holding your hand to his clothed cock over Namjoon’s basketball shorts and he was starting to move your hand slightly up and down his shaft that you could feel so distinctly through the loose fabric.

“Mmmm” he moaned out lowly, his deep voice so erotic and inticing.

“For learning?” you whispered, hesitantly moving your face towards his.

He broke into a boxy smile that made you want to melt.

“Show me” he spoke softly, his hand now tugging at the button on your jeans.

He pressed his forehead against your own, biting down on his lower lip.

“Please” he breathed out.

At this point you were too far gone to think clearly. He was begging, and he was too tempting to deny.

You nodded your head slightly, closing your eyes as you felt him now undoing your button and unzipping your jeans. So slowly it was almost as if he was teasing you.

He dropped to his knees as he pulled down your pants and panties all in one swift motion. His tongue darted out and he wet his lips quickly as his eyes widened at the sight of your lower half naked in front of him.

“Never...Never done...never seen” he muttered, his eyes flicked up to meet yours.

“I’ll teach you”

“Please” he groaned, bringing his attention back to your pussy that was eye level with him.

His forefinger trailed across your outer folds ever so lightly. You felt a chill of pleasure and want run over your skin, giving you goosebumps all over.

“Show me” he repeated his request from earlier.

You decided to step back from him to go lay on the desk, so you could spread your legs and give him a better view. He pouted until he realized what you were doing. Now he was walking towards you and dropping to his knees again, returning to face your dripping center at eye level.

“Wow” he whispered, he was so close that you could feel his breath against you.

“You...can touch me. Explore around I guess” you chuckled nervously, not sure if you were excited or scared to be in this position with him. You felt like if any of your crew found out what you were doing they’d be upset, especially Namjoon.

You closed your eyes tightly, breathing quickly anticipating the likely touch that was soon to come.

Taehyung stared into your center in awe, he didn’t quite know why he was so attracted to this part of you that he’d never seen on anyone before. Mermaids didn’t actually have sex. It wasn’t about pleasure or getting off, it was purely for creating children, you never even had to touch the other during the act. It wasn’t intimate, it wasn’t this…

The urges that he was having were so foriegn to him, he knew it was coming from the new body part he’d found dangling between his legs that seemed to somehow be growing even harder as he stared at your nakedness laid out in front of him.

You were becoming wet, Taehyung liked the wet, it was so inviting, he wanted to feel it on his fingers.

You shuddered as he started to feel around, brushing against your clit every so often, never entering you.

You realized he might not understand that he could. One of your hands crept down to join his, he almost jumped back in surprise, he had been so entranced in touching you he’d almost forgotten anything else in the world existed. When your hand reached down he snapped back to reality a bit. You started to press a finger into your dripping hole. Moaning as you brought the finger in and out. Taehyung felt his cock twitch at the sound of your pleasure, he realized he wanted to do whatever he could to be the one making you create those beautiful noises. He didn’t understand why, but the thought of pleasuring you made him more excited than he’d ever been in his life.

“You can do this to me” you told him, “Try”

Taehyung nodded and brought his finger to replace yours that had just retracted itself from your hole.

Without even realizing why he did this, his other hand snapped up and grabbed your wrist before you could pull your hand away. He brought his lips to the finger you’d had inside of you and pulled it into his mouth, carefully avoiding touching you to his sharp teeth, sucking and licking, growling in satisfaction at how unexpectedly pleasent the taste was.

“Wow” he whispered as he released your hand from his grip.

He then returned his focus to his other hand.

“Another?” he asked as he started to tease your entrance with two fingers.

“Yes. I can probably only take two though” you moaned,

Taehyung chuckled, and decided he was going to try a third after he played around with two fingers. The scientist in him needed to test that theory that you could only take two.

The louder your moans got, the more Taehyung felt this urge for you to be touching him back. When your hand was on him over his clothes earlier it was all he could think about, and he needed you to touch him again.

He started to push into you with a third finger.

“Fuck, Taehyung, Thats too” you gasped out in high pitched moans.

Taehyung smirked as he continued, “Shh, Will be okay” he muttered. You were so tight but adjusting to him. He started to move his fingers around, and then remembered that you had shuddered and moaned every time that he had brushed against the nub that rested right above where his fingers were going in and out of you. And the way you had tasted when he licked your wetness off of your fingers still lingered on his tongue, he needed another taste, Maybe he should be giving some attention there too…

He brought his mouth to your clit and started to give small licks, you responded more than he’d anticipated, bucking your hips up into his mouth, it makes Taehyung swell with pride that he’d figured out how to make you feel even better.

“Taehyung I’m g-gonna cum soon, I’m getting so close” you gasped out.

Suddenly his head snapped away from you, you whimpered at the loss of him.

“Cum?” he looked up at you in confusion.

“Um yeah, like have an orgasm” You explained.

“Hmmm” he hadn’t fully realized he was working towards a finish here, he had just been having fun. But now that he knew there was an end purpose to his actions it only motivated him to work harder. His tongue dove back into you, flicking and licking faster than before. He had to hold your squirming hips down with his free hand so he could keep his pace.

“Fuck!” you screamed out loudly “Taehyung don't stop! I’m cumming”

Taehyung smiled widely against you as he continued his surprisingly skilled tongue work, lapping up every bit of the wetness that you were giving to him as you came. He felt the walls around his fingers pulsing and tightening around him as you rode out your high.

He didn’t stop for a moment after you had came. You were giggling as you tried to wiggle away from him.

“Ah, Taehyung, Ahh, Stop. It’s too sensitive now!” you squealed.

He chuckled and continued for a few seconds more before pulling himself away from you. Wiping your juices from the corner of his mouth.

“That was the best orgasm I’ve ever had.” You put an arm over your forehead, your chest heaving up and down heavily. “Are you sure you’ve never done that before?”

Taehyung felt so proud of himself. “No never...Really good?”

“So good” you smiled at him, sitting up now. “Want me to return the favor?”

Taehyung nodded slowly, “Meaning...Touch me?” he asked, his hand now palming his hard and aching cock over his short.

“Yes, I want to touch you” you smiled sliding yourself off the table and getting down on your knees in front of him. He cocked an eyebrow up, curious at what you are doing now. Your fingers hooked around the hem of the shorts and pulled them down to his ankles. His cock sprung free now, so hard and needy, a small bead of precum already forming on his tip. You licked your lips and brought a hand up to grip the base of his cock.

“Oh” he whimpered as he threw his head back and shut his eyes tightly.

You then brought your lips to wrap around him, not fully taking him in, but enough that he could now feel your tongue laying flat against the underside of his tip. His hand reflexively snapped to the back of your head, wanting to push himself into you all the way, but not wanting to hurt you. You started to bob your head as your lips moved up and down his shaft. Taehyung's other hand now held the back of your head as well, gently moving with you as you moved on him.

Your tongue flicked over him in a way that felt like heaven, and he, without meaning to jerked his hips forward, causing you to take him in all the way. You quickly pulled away from him coughing and giggling.

“Sorry” Taehyung gasped, “Hurt?” he felt awful for his unintentional action that seemed to have caused you discomfort. Here you were making him feel so good and he was getting overly greedy.

“No, you’re fine. I get it” you chuckled “Let me adjust and you can do that more if you want”

Taehyung’s eyes widened dramatically as you now started to take him in fully, your lips now all the way at the base of his cock, your nose brushing against his abdomen.

“Do your thing now, I’ll tap your thigh hard three times if it’s too much for me okay? Then you have to stop, but unless I do that you can use my mouth however you want” you smirked up at him.

Taehyung nodded, and for a brief second a thought floated through the front of his mind. He was in love…

Taehyung’s hands returned to the back of your head, he started out slowly, moving his hips forward into your mouth as he gripped you tightly, pushing himself into your mouth all the way, and back out again. A loud grunt that surprised even him escaped his lips as he sped up.

Your eyes were watering as you choked a bit around him, but you didn’t want it to stop, you wanted him to cum. This beautiful godlike man was using your mouth so perfectly.

Taehyung felt himself tightening as the pleasure was building, was this his orgasm? He was slightly nervous for the feeling, when you came it seemed to be quite an intense thing. He didn’t quite know what to expect but if it felt anything like what he did right now he didn’t want to stop chasing it.

Suddenly you hummed around him, a low moan that sent vibrations through his cock. The feeling was overwhelmingly pleasurable. It was happening.

“Cumming” he whispered, his eyes rolling back as he shakily fucked himself into your mouth. The sensation that flooded over him as he poured his hot cum into your mouth couldn’t even be compared to anything he’d ever felt in his life. His cock twitched wildy inside your mouth and you moaned around him a few more times, swallowing every drop that he gave you.

He pulled away once it became too sensitive for him to continue.

It was your turn to wipe the corners of your mouth.

Taehyung cocked his head to the side as he stared down at you with a fucked outlook.

“Good.” he whispered through deep breaths, extending out his hand and brushing a thumb over your cheek and then your lower lip. You gently grabbed his wrist and kissed the palm of his hand.

“Very good”

---------------------------------------------------------------

The next few weeks you and Taehyung continued to learn from each other, in every way possible. Learning about each other's societies and cultures. And continuing extensive first hand anatomy lessons.

Taehyung had been falling more and more in love with you.

Now that he had legs you were able to take him out into the towns, showing him all of your favorite spots and places to go.

Everytime you grabbed his hand and pulled him over to something that excites you, that warm feeling of love and joy filled him up to the point that he felt he might explode.

Your happiness was irresistible, all of you was irresistible to him.

You were feeling similar, yet that dream you had weeks ago hasn't stopped appearing. Almost every night you dreamed of Taehyung’s hand around your throat as he dragged you down into the dark water, the dream had actually continued even longer than the first time. In the most recent dream everything was the same, expect that you could feel the water filling your lungs, you could feel yourself drowning. You woke up choking and grabbing at your throat. You hated yourself for somehow having this subconscious fear of Taehyung due to these dreams. Yet you’d still flinch away from in the morning’s where the dream had visited you during the night. You’d shudder slightly when you caught a glimpse of his teeth.

Namjoon had avoided you ever since your fight. He had turned in a resignation notice and that was the last you’d heard of him. It hurt that he felt like you were trying to steal all of the credit, you really weren’t. You would’ve put his name right next to yours on every research paper. You had cried when you saw Namjoon’s notice that he was leaving, Taehyung held you and kissed you on the cheek, telling you everything would be okay. You did feel some comfort in that, you’d lost your best friend...but gained a new one.

Then many things happened. All too fast and none of them good. About a week ago your office was broken into and you found all of your research had been stolen. You hated that you suspected Namjoon, but who else could it have been. Who else had access?

You suspected that he was going to publish the papers with just his name on them, same as he thought you were going to do to him.

You had tried calling him only to find that your number had been blocked.

--------

You and Taehyung were cuddling in your bed, enjoying a day off from work and just hanging around your house.

Your head was on his chest and your arms wrapped tightly around him. You felt him sigh heavily.

“Hey what's wrong” you wondered.

He simply sighed again.

“Tell me or I’ll tickle you” you chuckled.

Taehyung avoided meeting your eyes as he spoke, a small frown on his lips. “Miss home”

“Oh” you frowned

“Love here with you. But, Miss home. Miss water.” he sighed again.

You didn’t know what to say, and simply nuzzled your head against him. He brought an arm around your shoulders pulling you in tightly and kissing you on the top of your head.

Suddenly your phone was beeping wildey. You groaned and rolled over to your nightstand table picking it up.

Text from Jungkook: Call me.

Text from Jungkook: Y/n????

Test from Jungkook: Y/N CALL NOW

You were completely confused at what might be so urgent. You clicked the button to return his many calls that he’d also tried.

“Y/n oh my god” Jungkook was frantically gasping.

“What the hell Kook are you okay?”

“Have you seen the news?”

Your body froze and you got extremely nervous. What news? What could possibly have happened.

“Y/n everyone been lying to us. Jin lied to us, The government lied to us. Taehyung has been lying to you” Jungkook was shakily gasping out.

You spun around to Taehyung who was glaring at your phone, he seemed to have overheard that last part and his jaw was clenched tightly.

“W-what do you mean?” You stammered.

“Y/n, Off phone now.” Taehyung growled. “Please”

Your eyes widened at how aggressive Taehyung seemed to be getting.

“Jungkook just tell me what happened!”

Taehyung lunged forward and grabbed your phone out of your hand, breaking it in half with ease and tossing it across the room.

“No.” he spoke with a grim quietness.

You scrambled out of bed running to the other side of the room away from Taehyung, your heart beating fast and your stomach filling with a sickening feeling.

“Taehyung what the hell!” you yelled “What did Jungkook mean?”

Taehyung was shaking his head and running his fingers through his hair.

“Y/n. Not what it seems. Please. Didn’t want wrong idea. Please” he was starting to tear up. “Hear from me not from him” his voice shook as he spoke.

“Hear what from you!” you spoke through gritted teeth.

“y/n…” he whispered,

Suddenly there was a loud crash, and you heard the door to your house being opened and footsteps running towards your room. The door flung open wide and a frantic Namjoon stood in the entrance now.

“Y/n! Thank god you’re okay. I thought maybe he’d already taken you to the ship.” he was gasping.

“What the actual fuck is happening?” you screamed.

Taehyung was now standing and walking towards Namjoon, his body shaking with rage.

“Step back!” Namjoon screamed holding an arm out to Taehyung, your stomach dropped when you saw what was clutched in his hand. A gun, just like the one that Jin had on the ship.

Taehyung snarled and hissed animalistically at Namjoon, but backed up a few steps. His eyes flicking over to you.

“Y/n please. Love you y/n. Promise” Taehyung was whimpering. “Trust.”

“We have to go y/n” Namjoon spoke urgently pulling on your arm, still holding the gun out in warning at Taehyung.

You didn’t want to leave him though, you wanted to hear Taehyung explain himself. You wanted him to make this awful sinking feeling go away. You needed the man you loved…

Yet Namjoon was pulling you away from him and out of the house, then into his car. Speeding away from your house, you could see Taehyung running out of your home, his gaze following the car as you drove away, your eyes meeting. You could see him screaming something out at you.

The sight outside was shocking, you now realize why Jungkook was asking you if you’d seen the news.

The sky was scattered with ships that looked so familiar...they all looked identical to your one of a kind shuttle you’d taken to Neptune!

“Namjoon, what is happening?”

Namjoon didn’t tear his eyes away from the road, but he answered you in a very serious tone.

“Taehyung. This whole time he’s been playing you. His people wanted the plans on how you’d built the ship they’d seen and that's why they sent him with us. I’m assuming, once he’d tested out his theory that he could become just like us out of water he radioed that down to all of them too. Now they are here. And they aren’t being friendly.”

Your jaw dropped, you didn’t understand. Taehyung had been stealing your plans for the ship the whole time? And how did Namjoon know all of this? Was it Taehyung that had broken into your lab?

“And Taehyung isn’t the only one that’s been playing you. Our own fucking government was. They knew that they existed. It was never a question. They just hid it from the rest of society. It turns out each of our ruling powers had a similar idea. Neptune has been wanting to colonize on our moons, take them over. And our government wanted you to go down there and scope it out because they were thinking the same thing. Thats why Jin was there. And that's probably why he left the ship right away when we had arrived at their city. That's how my suspicions started, why would the government send a man with a gun like that unless they already had an idea. And the way Taehyung was so willing to be handed over and didn’t even seem to be worried. I just couldn’t get it off my mind that something was up.” He shook his head.

“B-but...Taehyung loves me” you stuttered

“Y/n I’m sorry, but he doesn’t love you. Hes been faking everything just to steal your research. They are literally here to wipe us all out and we need to get the fuck off of this planet before that happens” His hands shook on the steering wheel.

“I can’t...I don’t want to leave him. He may not love me. But...I love him” You started to sob uncontrollably.

“You’ll get over it” Namjoon scoffed, pulling into the hanger where your ship that you had taken to Neptune still sat.

“I got Hoseok and Jungkook here since they are familiar with this ship, and I made the government promise to get our families on the evacuation ships”

This was all happening so fast. Did Triton really not stand a chance against Taehyung’s people? Your mind flashed to the dream you’d been having and you felt that you might throw up. Your mind had been trying to tell you something was off this whole time. You were too infatuated with the hypnotizingly handsome merman you’d now fallen in love with to see the truth, you’d fed him enough information to destroy your entire civilization.

You quickly boarded your ship. Hoseok and Jungkook were already inside as Namjoon had mentioned.

You sat in silence, still in shock over everything that was happening as the ship took off.

“So where are we going” you muttered, turning to Namjoon.

“I know this sounds bad, but we are actually going down to Neptune...It’s big enough that we can hide out in this ship for now until the president issues out a notice that our people have found another planet or place to live... all the ships going out are scattering.” He sighed

“I-I’m so sorry Namjoon. Why didn’t you tell me sooner that you thought something was up. I could’ve stopped telling him things. Been more careful around him” you frowned “Not fallen in love with him” you spoke in a whisper.

“I’m sorry y/n. It wasn’t the right call. I just felt like it was safer if I didn’t say anything. But I was wrong” he shook his head.

In a few days your ship was nearing Neptune, the four of you had mostly slept the entire trip, trying to not look out and back on your moons. You’d caught a glimpse of what was happening and you couldn’t help but scream out as you saw the once gray surface of your home lit up red with explosions and flames. You hoped and prayed that your family and everyone else who had lived there had been fast enough to the evacuation ships.

“Landing! Get buckled” Hoseok yelled out over the intercom. You did as you were told shakily buckling yourself into your seat.

Once you hit the water, you just stayed still for a while. You all did. Probably sharing the same silent thought. What now?

Your questions were answered when suddenly a door that led to a storage room creaked open.

“Put your fucking hands in the air and don’t come any closer!” Namjoon shouted out. His gun he had brought with him now raised for a second time.

Your breath caught in your throat. And you knew you shouldn’t feel any happiness at the sight of this stow away. But you couldn’t help it.

“Tae-Taehyung” you whimpered.

Taehyung looked like he hadn’t slept in days, his blue hair messy and bags under his eyes.

“Please. Want explain” He choked out, stepping forward towards you.

“I said don’t move!” Namjoon boomed narrowing in on Taehyung with his gun.

“No! Please!” you ran directly in front of the gun with your hands out.

Namjoon let out a frustrated growl “Y/n…”

“I want to hear what he has to say…” you cried.

The room fell silent, and all eyes locked on to Taehyung. Namjoon nodded reluctantly for Taehyung to explain himself, lowering his gun, but staying on alert.

“Your people. Government. The date was set. Destroy date. I Hacked files and saw. You came and took pictures. The last pictures of my people. Government wanted kill us all. Date was set” he muttered looking down at the floor. “I wanted...save my people….I wanted also save you” he looked to you with sad eyes “Wouldn’t have let you hurt. Would’ve got you away!”

You wanted to believe him so badly. You wanted to hug him and kiss him, and share more cuddles on your bed at home like you had gotten so used to. But now you had no home, and it was because of him. Yet, if what he said was true, his people were only returning the favor in advance for what was about to happen on their planet.

“Y/n. Something about four…” He pointed to you, then to Namjoon, Hoseok and Jungkook, “You dream of water all your life. Want to see Neptune. Want to explore.” Taehyung turned to Jungkook “Pictures of Neptune so beautiful. And You” he pointed to Hoseok, “Knew the water well, fly ship in water, no one has ever done yes?”

Hoseok nodded, none of you understanding where he was going with this. Taehyung turned to Namjoon.

“Why Neptune? Why here now? Whole galaxy. Yet here.” he asked as if he already knew the answer. Then Taehyung turned to you.

“Trust?” he muttered, holding out his arms wide.

You had no idea why, but you did trust him. His dark eyes had done nothing but lie to you, yet all you wanted to do was keep believing in them.

You nodded and ran to his arms. He embraced you in a giant bear hug, twirling you around.

You smiled as he kissed you on your head.

“Go water now” He whispered in your ear.

“You’re leaving?”

“No. Two” he pointed to you and then to him.

“I can’t, remember, we can’t breath under water”

“Theory.” he stated.

“Fact?” you raised an eyebrow. “Humans die underwater if they don’t get enough air.”

Taehyung groaned “Trust,” he grumbled.

Despite the rest of your crew pleading for you to stop, you followed Taehyung out a hatch that led to the roof of the ship. You now stood on top, sunlight shining down on Taehyung’s glowing skin. He grinned at you as the two of you looked over the vast un ending water laid out in front of you.

“Jump?” Taehyung asked, holding out his hand to you.

You sighed, feeling slightly uneasy about whatever this was. But, still, you put your hand in his and let him hold on tight to you.

“Trust…” you muttered under your breath, taking a deep breath in as the two of you did a running jump off of the top of your ship and into the water.

Taehyung instantly changed back into his iridescent mermaid form, his tail flowing elegantly in the water. You pointed for him to swim with you back up to the surface, you already felt yourself craving a breath.

He smirked and shook his head. You did not like where this was going.

Instantly after you had a thought of swimming back to the surface even though he’d said no, he was holding you tightly, and dragging you down, down, down.

Everything was so dark, and your lungs felt like they might explode. Your dream came into your mind again. Though this time his hands weren’t on your throat they were holding you around your waist, holding you under. You beat him with your fists hoping to free yourself from him. But you knew, even if you were to be released, he’d dragged you too far down for you to make it up in time.

This was it.

It was over.

Your fight or flight instinct failing, as there was no way to save yourself anymore. You gave up.

Taehyung pulled back from you as you started to go dizzy and limp. He spoke something you couldn’t hear...as if it were another language...Like in your dream.

He planted a soft kiss on your lips. Far too loving and delicate for someone that was murdering you.

Yet somehow, you were glad.

You had loved him so much.

You were only sad that now you’d never see him again.

As everything faded away and your eyes closed, you felt your body try to take in a breath. Only to have your lungs fill with water.

Then complete darkness, complete nothingness.

-------------------------------------------------

Namjoon, Hoseok and Jungkook ran to the top of the ship. Looking down into the water.

“She hasn’t come back up yet...it’s been 10 minutes” Jungkook cried out.

Namjoon shook his head, tears burning his eyes as he clenched his fists.

“I shouldn’t have let her go with him. I can’t believe I let him…” his voice cracked.

Suddenly the water broke. A wet mess of blue hair was popping up from the water.

Taehyung….

As soon as he was within earshot Namjoon screamed out.

“Where is she!?”

“Come see” Taehyung grinned with a sing song voice. “Take you to her...Follow?” he said cutely.

“Fuck.” Hoseok whispered. “This is bad. She's not with him. He killed her” he growled.

Jungkook shook his head “No, no NO! This can’t be happening. Y/n…” he cried.

Namjoon glared down at the man who was at the edge of the ship now, smiling up at the three of them, his blue tail peaking out ever so slightly from the water.

“Why shouldn’t I just shoot you right now” he pulled the gun up and aimed it directly to the forehead of the blue haired merman who seemed unphased by the threat.

“Want see her yes?” he asked cheerfully. “Trust” he smiled mischievously, motioning for Namjoon to come into the water with him. Namjoon was sure it was a lie, it was a trick. But, he even if it was in death, he wanted to see y/n again.

“I’m sorry guys.” Namjoon whispered, tossing the gun aside on the top of the ship and diving down into the water next to the grinning merman.

-----------------------------------

Your eyes fluttered open, there was a weird feeling of weightlessness around you. Everything surrounding you was colorful, you definitely weren’t back on Triton. Which means there's no way all of this had just been a dream.

You were laying on a stone bed in an odd room, the walls were decorated with shimmering shells and glass.

In your confusion you went to stand up and go investigate your surroundings. Yet something stopped you.

You couldn’t move your feet.

Well, something moved. But it wasn’t feet. You looked down and screamed out loudly.

Where legs used to be was now a glittering silver scaled tail, resembling the one that Taehyung had, only differing in color.

At your screams Taehyung quickly swam into the room.

“Y/n. Awake!” his eyes widened.

You jumped and backed away from him, closer to the wall.

“Taehyung what the fuck is happening. I-I thought…” you thought he had killed you. It was the last thing that you can remember.

“Never.” he shook his head. “Y/n. Never hurt you” he held out his hand to you. “Learn? Swim?”

You nervously swam towards him, it wasn’t elegant and graceful like how he always swam, but you got to him.

He pulled you into a loving embrace, petting the top of your head as he held you to his soft and warm chest.

“y/n is awake?” A voice rang out.

You broke yourself away from Taehyung's arms to find where that familiar voice was coming from.

Namjoon swam over to you. Like you, he was missing legs, and his were replaced by a long green tail.

“This is crazy isn’t it?” his eyes widened. “I still can’t quite believe it. But I’m loving it” he swam up and did a backwards flip. “It’s kinda like flying. Hoseok And Jungkook are somewhere around here ” he looked around searching for your other companions.

Taehyung chuckled putting an arm around your shoulders.

“What is going on here?”

Namjoon swam to face you and Taehyung.

“Y/n. The reason Mermaids speak our language. The reason both our people knew about each other” he paused collecting his excitement. “They all just explained this to me, so Taehyung, let me know if I’m leaving anything out. Everyone up on the moons was originally from here on Neptune. A long long time ago, the mer people learned that they could walk on dry land, but there was no dry land, so they set out to see if there was any where that they could. They had made it to the moons but a cruel leader at the time destroyed all of the ships and all records of how to get back home. The knowledge of the merpeople was passed down through stories, until a journal was found not too long ago of a scientist that had built the ships that could go back and forth between the worlds. It was turned into the government and that’s when they started plotting to wipe them out, and figure out a way to colonize. I had no idea but It was actually one of the books that were given to me by the government for research help while I was building the ship. They were going to use us and our research to kill everyone here” he finally stopped for a moment after his long speech “did I get everything?” He turned to Taehyung, who nodded.

“Not all moon people can turn back. But, More than realize though. Can tell” he pointed to himself “always drawn to water. Always need learn, explore, color, need more…” he informed you.

So he knew, he knew the whole time what all of you were.

“And we can stay here with you?” You whispered, it all still felt like a dream.

Taehyung smiles and kissed your cheek.

“Yes” he whispered “please stay”

#bts fanfic #bts angst #bts fluff #bts smut #taehyung x reader #taehyung x you #taehyung smut #bts imagines #bts scenario #mermaid!au #mermaid!taehyung #btssmutclub #btswriterscollective #bts x you

648 notes · View notes

semiconducting · 3 years

Text

just reflecting on some personal growth stuff from last year !

im actually. genuinely okay. like i think im starting this year feeling okay! which is atypical.

i think i can attribute it to the enormous amount of work id put into myself over the past year...i remember one year ago being extraordinarily depressed and really just. high strung? incredibly anxious but exhausted. and i fell down a descent slowly from not eating, to getting really irritable and not handling conflicts with friends well, to actively self harming again, to the point where i remembered sitting in a coffee shop with one of my friends and saying out loud that i need to go to therapy. and that i was going to talk to a mutual friend of ours about how the therapy services on campus are. which was a huge step for me! ive always had trust issues with therapy services since i was 12 for reasons i wont go into, but im sure you can gather the point of.

and then, literally the next day after saying that, got news about campus shutting down because of the virus.

and i made all of the effort possible to reach out to my friends and get things figured out to weather the storm because i KNEW shit was going to get bad if i didnt. but only one of my friends was really keeping up, and thats because he and i do homework together so we were already in a rhythm of talking every single week no matter what. and thats not to say that im ungrateful for him or the fact that even still he was there for me while i was going through hell, i have this thing about Not Putting All My Problems On And Confiding In One Person And One Person Only. so i withdrew, i stopped talking to everyone, i stopped logging into my classes, i didnt do any homework, i didnt lead my workshops, didnt hold office hours...i was just wallowing in my own misery

and i made plans to kill myself. and thats like, i mean i could say that several dozen times over the course of a year since i was like 12, but i mean a legitimate walkthrough plan. had my hiking bag packed with everything i was going to use, decided where i was going to, and was going to prep myself for it. wrote drafts and drafts of suicide notes until i decided just leaving the contact info of people who needed to know asap was all i was going to leave. in addition to sticky notes on some stuff in my room for what needed to be returned to who, or if something should go to someone in particular...

and i acted as normally as i could around my housemates. attributed my not leaving my room much to being busy with classes. i have a rule to myself to always sleep at least one night before killing myself because if im really serious about going through with it it can always wait one day. this time i decided i was going to clean my room and leave it as pristine as possible. the last thing i had to do was a load of laundry, and then i was going to do it.

and then someone from campus showed up at my door. because one of my professors filed a report and i hadnt responded to any of the emails id received checking in on me.

so i readjusted. caught up on my schoolwork, just barely finished the semester and definitely didnt do it strong or well (god bless the pass/fail option bc of covid LOL), but i did it nonetheless. went home, started my internship, had a miserably mundane summer.

i grew bitter and apathetic. i was angry at my friends for not being responsive when i reached out to them to talk or hang out or do anything. i got tired of dealing with it. i was tired of feeling alone and like no one gave a shit about me except for when it was convenient for them. i decided that i wasnt going to deal with people who werent willing to put any effort into me, so i stopped talking to everyone and kept up with people who were willing to reach out after the fact.

it’s definitely not the best approach. it’s really unforgiving and it doesn’t give people a lot of benefit of the doubt, but i think it was necessary in some respect. i didn’t have any criteria for how people needed to reach out, or how long after, or whatever, just that they did. really needed people in my life who are willing to communicate with me. i was honest with how i was feeling and why i did things if they did, apologized for the shitty approach, thanked them for still being willing to talk to me, and worked out the best way for both of us to keep things going.

over the months i dont think i really regret the decision, because it’s been a weight off my shoulders. i feel a lot better. i’m far more okay with where i stand in all of my friends’ lives, even if that’s not as a priority and even if that’s as just someone to talk to and catch up with like a couple times a year. it took a bit for it to pay off but it’s nice to take a look at people i was putting far too much work into and upon reflection realizing that they only interacted with me when they needed something from me, and not for me as a person. i think there are still people where there are loose ends and i think i may try reaching out myself to tie those up at some point, whenever i have the energy and clarity of mind for it. but i guess at the end of the day i just decided that people who weren’t willing to communicate weren’t worth the time. i’m okay if that communication means i need to be the one to initiate conversations even! i just need to know that.

but yeah. i came back to ny and started the semester totally apathetic and angry. i was so fucking depressed and bored with everything even if i was keeping myself incredibly busy. the only thing that i found rewarding (and what was just barely keeping me going) was leading my workshop for the intro optics class.

and then a friend -- the same friend i was at the coffee shop with -- reached out to catch up. and i was honestly really bitter and angry with him and was prepping myself to start listing out issues that i hadnt been able to address with him beforehand (side note, while telling friends the issues you have with them is important, listing shit out all at once is hardly ever a good approach especially without warning LOL) but ended up...just having a calming and comfortable conversation about what was going on in our lives since we last saw each other.

n later that day i ended up reaching out to an old friend that i had been meaning to catch up with because we fell out of contact, but had just barely been trying to start talking again in the months before this but had kept missing opportunities to properly converse. but we talked again, and we set up a day to hike and catch up.

and he comes to my house and picks me up. and i get in his car. and its like, holy shit, its been almost a year since ive seen you. and we hugged. and just started to catch each other up on the mess that had been our lives since we’d actively been in contact. we hiked, he told me about the books he wanted to write, we talked about people we knew, we talked about politics, we talked about school, we talked about life, and it was just as comfortable as if not a day had passed...even though it was obvious that he and i were both changed people over the past year. nothing about our friendship was any different though.

we resolved to hanging out with each other every week. decided we both needed the interaction, appreciated having each other around, and had a nice overlap of free time in the week that worked well. friday nights unless otherwise specified.

it was totally unexpected. he’d always been a great friend to me, but i never expected us to get as close as we did. neither did he. he’s probably the first person in my life (or at least in a very long time, and certainly the only person at the time) that i’d been so comfortable with that i practically had no boundaries around. none that needed to be addressed, anyway, because the only possible ones to throw up wouldn’t even come up (but of course, i constantly reassured that as soon as anything came up i would let him know because early on he kept asking sjhdkjfh).

he became something for me to look forward to in the week. towards the beginning he was a shoulder to lean on when i needed it and was willing to listen to things i hadn’t been able to tell anyone out loud. and he confided in me as well. it was comfortable. it was safe. it was a level of trust with vulnerability that i’d never shown anyone else.

but it wasnt even just that! it was fun! hes so fun. we could talk about everything and nothing, and hes one of the only people where i feel like i have to keep up with him in conversation instead of the other way around. we’d jump from topic to topic so much faster than either of us could think and it was all always so interesting. littered with humour that was just dumb and simple. i felt comfortable just being an idiot with him. i felt like i had nothing to prove.

for the past few years ive held to the sentiment that i like to hang around with people that make me a better person. but somehow, with him, its not that i felt like he made me a better person, but that he made me more myself. he saw who i was without any kind of fronts. and i always was afraid to show anyone that me because i always assumed that they would be depressing, loathsome, bitter, angry, and vicious.

but....i’m not. i learned that i’m incredibly loving. that i’d do fuckin anything to for my friends, but always in a way that was healthy and rewarding for both of us. i’m very light-hearted and my sense of humour is so stupid, but also very analytical and thoughtful. just a bit judgmental and pretentious, but always for things that people dont expect. totally open minded in discussions. an avid explorer, and a bit of a thrillseeker. and so, so, so affectionate.

i realized im. not as horrible as ive always made myself out to be. i accepted that i didnt need to punish myself for things beyond my control. i realized that i could believe people when they tell me that they enjoy my company, or appreciate things i do for them, or that they think i’m a worthwhile person to keep around.

its not that i dont have my flaws, its not that there arent things that i have to work on still. but maybe, at my core, i’m not actually motivated by spite, i’m not actually a hopeless pessimist, and that i’m not...broken. i’m not some secretly irredeemable monster.

and for a period of time i’ve been in a place where i could say i was genuinely...happy! and i don’t think i’ve ever been able to say that. i’ve certainly been made happy by doing things with friends in the past, i’ve been through periods where i’ve been okay with where i am at in life, but ever since i was like 12 (but probably even before that) i’d never been able to say that i was happy. it’s not that i wasn’t stressed, it’s not that things in my life were all going perfectly....but they didn’t define my mood. they didn’t define my view of myself. school, despite being the primary focus of my life, wasn’t dictating how i was feeling. even when things were agonizing and depressing because of school, i was still okay. i was incredibly stable.

and i owe that all to him being there for me. and hardly any of these things were anything that he was really directly responsible for, like its not that he sat there and just constantly showered me in reassurance and praise or anything that changed how i view myself...it was just having his company. it was just being able to sit there and listen to him go on about some totally random thing that he was exceptionally knowledgeable about. it was exploring caves and climbing hills. it was cooking together. it was talking about science. it was talking about love. it was talking about music. it was just having a consistent presence in my life, someone that treated me like a priority but never at the expense of himself, and someone i didn’t have to walk on any kind of eggshells around. it was someone who trusted me and respected me not by anything id done to warrant it, but just because of who i was.

it was a reminder that i can take care of my own problems, that i just need to be a good presence in someone’s life and for them to be a good presence in mine.

but also that i can accept help from people who genuinely want to offer it! and that that help doesnt always have to be direct. that sometimes helping me means i get to do something nice for someone else LOL

it was everything i ever needed and i wasnt even looking for it. he meant the world to me and i was so, so thankful for the circumstances that led us here because i was so happy to have him in my life again. i was happy that we were able to get closer because we’d only been able to interact in professional environments before.

and then i realized i was in love. and i had a sexuality crisis. but i didn’t recognize it until i fell hard because it was a different kind of love than i’ve felt for anyone before. it was intense but entirely too comfortable. but i knew that i cared about him, and that he cared about me, and that i really didn’t need anything about our friendship to change but that it had potential to be something even greater than it was.

and i resolved to tell him about it...until he told me first. and that moment was, as cheesey as it sounds, nothing less than magical. we were both so happy and giggly and it was so sweet and warm and i dont know if im ever going to be able to recreate that feeling because it was just so particular, so specific to being something between me and him. its not that i cant love anyone else as strongly or be as happy as i was necessarily, but it’ll never be that same kind of feeling.

but things happened. things got complicated. i think he panicked. and then things that happened just felt so dirty and hollow and dark. he hurt me really, really, really badly, and it managed to happen in the span of four days.

and i’ve spent the last <2 weeks dealing with it. i think he’s dealing with it in his own ways, but realistically i don’t know how because i havent seen him since christmas eve, and we were both definitely not being completely genuine that day. was at his house for a small family party and he and i were the only ones who knew what happened. it was too soon to have healed from it any, but we couldnt exactly be honest about it then either.

and im doing better. im genuinely okay now. and, interestingly, i think i owe it to the past few months of hanging out with him and how ive been able to come to terms with a lot of things about myself. ive been able to show myself compassion. its really ironic.

its a situation where i was desperately trying to throw blame onto myself for, because if i could then i could punish myself for it and use it to fuel that deep rooted self hatred and then i could fix it, because i’d be the one responsible for fixing it. but, and i’ve talked to quite a few friends about it trying to figure out who to confide in about it, everyone who knows about it insists that i cant blame myself for it. theres not a thing about the situation that i can blame myself for. and its so fucking weird, because i cant bring myself to fully blame him for it either, just because it was so ABSURDLY out of character that it doesnt feel like it was anything he could have done to me. it was a boundary that i wasnt ever supposed to worry about him crossing, because he’s just not that kind of person.

and it’s the type of situation that you’re supposed to totally be willing to cut someone off for but...i can’t. he’s genuinely remorseful and i think he doesn’t really know how to deal with it either. and despite it being a massive fuck up its still like...the first fuck up in our friendship from either of us. and i’m willing to see this through. i think it’s salvageable, even if it’ll never be the same as it was. i have faith in our friendship. i think we can make it work.

but no matter what happens. i owe him more than i’ll ever be able to repay him for. and i’ll never, ever be able to hate him because of that. i’m in a much, much better place because of him and for that i’ll always be thankful.

#shut up mega #this ended up being longer and more in depth abt the earlier half of the year than i meant it LOL #a summary of my 2020 i spose #also there's some kinda detailed talk of #suicide ment -#self harm ment -#IM CRYING AFTER WRITING THIS OUT LMAOOOO

2 notes · View notes

iwillbeinmynest · 4 years

Text

The Ravens- Loki x Reader(f) Part 5

Authors Notes: Holy. Crap. I am SO SORRY. but I’ve finally finished it. Finally. This is the last of my unfinished series so now i have caught y'all up on everything. Thanks so much for sticking with me y’all!!

AU: Rockstar!AU

Word Count: 2.2k+

Notes/Warnings: Fluffs all the fluffs, mentions of drinking, and...I think thats..it? Let me know if I've missed something! oh, i guess spelling errors should be a warning lol I tried to catch as much as I could but I’m sure i’ve missed some.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4

"Loki."

He felt a nudge to his side.

"Loki, sweetheart, wake up."

Ah. He knew that voice. It was in his dreams, his mind and his whole world. He groaned and rolled over, dragging the thin sheet with him.

She chuckled.

A smack of fabric and his eyes snapped open from the impact of the heavy pillow. "Ow." He lied with a grin.

"Get up." She smiled and crossed her arms. "We need to be at the arena in an hour." She walked to the bed and he reached for her. She pulled away before he could catch her wrist. "No. Get up, lazy bum." She laughed.

"I don't want to." He mumbled groggily.

She jumped onto the bed, shaking the mattress so much that his head bounced up. Y/N laughed at him. "I told you to get up."

Loki finally sat up in bed but grabbed Y/N by the shoulders and tugged her close. She laughed again as he rolled over, laying back down and spooning her. "I refuse."

He nuzzled his nose to her neck and kissed it twice.

"You rockstars are all the same. You just wanna stay in bed all day and party all night." She teased.

"I don't have any interest in partying, my love. Just this. You and me, right here. Forever." He confessed.

Y/N hummed and leaned into him. "I'd love that." She jerked forward and hopped off the bed. "But first you need to get dressed. There will be a limo here in 45 minutes and you better be downstairs. Don't stand me up, Loki Odinson!" She called as she left the room.

The hotel door clicked shut and Loki rolled to his back. He smiled to the ceiling at the thought of her. She was everything he ever wanted and more.

He huffed as he got out of bed and headed for the shower to get ready.

He thought about the last year. How quickly it had flown by, yet, at the same time, every moment with Y/N had seemed to last a lifetime. They had started dating right after his first solo gig at Harry's. The same night he first sang her song.

They'd kept things under the radar for a while; she was pretty hesitant about the possibility of paparazzi and crazy fans of his. And he'd understood that completely. But when a fan recognized him while he was on a date with her, a photo was sent to TMZ and things unraveled pretty quickly after that.

A week later they announced their relationship. Y/N still wanted to live in New York but when fans of Loki's began approaching her she quickly realized that normalcy wasn't in her future.

So, she moved out to LA where she took up a new job and moved into a rather expensive apartment at Loki's persistent request. He promised that to make up for her having to move, he'd put her up in a penthouse but she convinced him to settle on letting her take just a 4 bedroom with an ocean view.

And that's when things began to get really easy. Having been on a tour break, they saw each other almost daily for about six months. Loki really fell into the idea of domestication. Him and her together all the time, talking about their day and what to do for dinner. It was a peace he'd only heard about.

He wasn't about to give that up, either.

Loki invited her to go on tour with The Ravens, explaining that this would be his last trip around the globe with the band. He'd broken the news to Thor before plans for a world tour had even been laid. Told him that he needed to be done and to explore his own music, go solo, along with other plans. When Thor reacted with nothing but enthusiasm, Loki had been in shock. He was certain that news like that would have sent Thor on a rampage but all he got was a bellowing laugh, a hug that threatened asphyxiation and a soft 'I'm proud of you, brother'.

To say that Loki was relieved to be done with the rockstar lifestyle was an understatement.

One last show, he reminded himself as he ran his fingers through his wavy, air-dried locks. One last show and then forever.

He met Y/N down in the lobby with a smile. "Are you ready?" He asked with an arm extended.

She wrapped her hand around his elbow and rolled her eyes. "I've been ready for an hour and a half."

She looked up at him with a world-stopping grin.

"I'm sorry, my love. I'll be better next time."

"He says on his way to his last show." She chuckled.

Loki opened the door of the limo for her and she slid in. He sat beside her and shut the door.

"I'm actually nervous for this one." He admitted.

She looked at him confused. "You've been looking forward to this for weeks."

Loki shrugged. Now wasn't the time to get into it. He put an arm across her shoulder and kissed her head when she settled into his side.

They could hear the crowds before they could hear see the stadium. Playing their final show back in New York in Madison Square Garden was perfect. It was here, last year, that Loki had decided to play his first solo gig, inspired by the woman at his side. It was a full circle.

The flashes were dimmed thanks to the heavy tint of the limo's windows but they both squinted nonetheless.

"Time to put on that brooding expression everyone expects." Y/N teased. Loki's gloomy persona had originally been that of true unhappiness but now that he had Y/N, he kept it up for the band’s sake and reputation.

"My favorite part." He scoffed.

Y/N kissed his cheek and he turned on her, capturing her lips in a deeper, but tender, display.

"I love you." He breathed.

"I love you, too." She smiled with closed eyes. "We better get out before the fans tip the car."

They both chuckled and a security guard opened the car door.

Loki dropped his smile and got out, ignoring the screaming fans as he helped Y/N out of the back seat. He pulled her close and nodded to the crowd. They were quickly escorted inside where they only had a few seconds of peace before Loki was swarmed by hair and wardrobe and stage managers.

The roar of the crowd was like nothing Y/N had ever heard before. Sure, she’d been to many of their shows but this was Madison Square Garden. This was quite possibly the biggest crowd the band had ever had a t one event and they’d sold out within hours of the tickets going on sale. There were even rumors that the arena was selling tickets for standing room.

Y/N stood backstage and watched Loki and the band play all of their biggest hits. Song after song for the last hour. The pyrotechnics and lights matched the heavy music and the crowd was loving every second of it.

FInally, they were down to their last song of the night.

“Thank you, New York!” Thor shouted. They screamed back. “Thank you!” He raised his hands to try and hush them. “We are so glad to have shared this night with all of you and thank you for coming out to support us. We have an announcement to make and hopefully you won’t be too sad,”

The crowd began to get noisier with concerned chatter.

“Don’t worry,” Thor smiled. “We aren’t done rockin’ quite yet.”

They cheered.

“But,” he continued. “But Loki,” He gestured to his brother as the crowd quieted. “Loki has some changes coming his way and we couldn’t be happier for him.” Thor nodded to Loki who stepped up to his mic.

He waved at the fans and offered a solemn smile. “Firstly, before I get into all of that, I want to say thank you to each and every one of you for your support through the years. And a special thanks to those of you who prefer me over my brother,” A half serious jest.

The crowd laughed and a few even cheered.

“But the big news is that I have decided…” Loki took a deep breath. This was it. “To go solo.”

The area erupted in noise. A combination of chatter, cheers, boos and shouts.

Loki held up his hands and the noise lowered enough that he continued. “But that’s not the biggest change.” He looked to the side stage to see Y/N standing there with her hands clasped and pressed under her wide smile. She nodded at him.

Loki smiled back and then extended his hand out to her. “Y/N, darling, why don’t you come out here for a moment.”

Y/N eyes went wide and her smile disappeared. Her head ticked and her smile returned with suspicion as she walked out to meet him.

Loki took his guitar off and handed it to Volstagg. He took Y/N by the hand and kissed her knuckles before returning to the mic. “I believe most of you know my lovely girlfriend. She has been the light of my life since the very moment I met her. She inspired me and very quickly became my muse. She has given me courage to play my music, to write it, and to explore it in a way I hadn’t known. She is my refuge and my rock and I can’t imagine where I would be without her.”

Y/N’s cheeks were red with flattery and she shook her head. “What are you doing?” She whispered.

Loki smiled but didn’t answer. He looked to the crowd. “Tonight I’ve announced that I am leaving the Ravens. Flying away, so to speak, and never in my life have I been so nervous before a show. But my nerves had nothing to do with that announcement,” he took another breath, “And everything to do with this question.”

He looked to Y/N, took both of her hands and dropped to one knee.

The crowd burst into screams and cheers.

The sound, as loud as it was, seemed to fade away. Loki never took his eyes off of Y/N and asked, “Y/N, will you marry me?”

Y/N couldn’t hear a word but she knew what he’d said. She ignored the tears that were now falling down her cheeks and nodded her head. “Yes,” she sobbed and fell into his arms.

Loki scooped her up and spun her around. He laughed and kissed the side of her head until she pulled back and kissed him.

Somehow the crowd managed to scream even louder.

Loki finally released his fiance long enough to slip the ring on her finger, which he kissed then held up in victory.

Thor and the rest of the band rushed over and congratulated them both. After a few minutes of praise and cheer, the crowd settled.

“Alright,” Thor started. “Enough of that.” He joked and Loki actually laughed with him. “We’ve got one final song for tonight and I’d like to play it in honor of my brother who, adopted or not, I love above everyone else. I’m proud of you and wish you nothing but success, which I know you’ll have in both your life and career.” He nodded to Loki who smiled as he took his guitar back from Volstagg.

The band rocked as hard as they could with three encores. The show was followed by an afterparty for the band, crew and a select number of invited guests. It was hosted at Harry’s bar where Loki had played just a year ago. People continued to come up and congratulate Loki and Y/N who remained inseparable through the night.

Sometime around 4 am, the party had died out and only Thor, Loki and Y/N remained.

“I really am happy for you, brother.” Thor said after finishing the last of his beer.

As inebriated as Thor was, Loki knew he was telling the truth. He pulled Y/n a little tighter. “Thank you, brother.”

“I think it’s probably time for me to be heading out.” Thor stood up but almost toppled over just as fast.

Loki stood and caught him. “Okay, I think that’s a good idea. Lets get you in a car.” loki caught the attention of the driver and nodded.

After getting Thor sent off, loki returned to his fiance. “Ready to go, love?”

“Actually,” She grinned, “I was feeling a bit hungry and I know this great little diner not to far from here.”

Loki kissed her hands again as he remembered their dinner there. “I finally kissed you that night.” He ginned.

“Finally.” She joked.

“Oh, come on, admit it,” He said as he escorted her out to their car. “You loved the wait. You were playing hard to get.”

She gasped and swatted his arm. “I was not! Thor kept interrupting us, remember.”

Loki chuckled. “I do.” He gave the driver the address of the diner and the car pulled off. “I never did get to thank you, by the way.”

“For what?” Y/N yawned as she leaned her head on his shoulder.

“For saying yes.” He leaned his head on hers.

“Till the end of time, love.” She held his arm tighter.

“Till the end of time.”

* * * * *

Forever Tags:

@heismyhunter @sgtbxckybxrnes @pickledmoon @whimsicalrebirth @marvel-lucy @thisisthelilith @james-bionic-barnes @thedreamingowl @poemwriter98@kimistry27 @annie-lujan @buckyandsebsinbin @lilasiannerd @gypsy-storm-15 @cassiopeiassky @earinafae @the-stuttering-kiwi @obsessedwithatwell @shortiiqt16 @shifutheshihtzu @elaacreditava @nikkitia7 @theonewithallthemilkshakes @gallifreyansass @storytellingwanderer @palaiasaurus64 @iamwarrenspeace @engineeringgirlcve @magnolia-wanders @carameldaemoncakes @canumoveyourseatup-no @melconnor2007 @movingonto-betterthings @spideytrxsh @fantasticmiraclehologram @kapolisradomthoughts @iamwarrenspeace @melconnor2007 @yesiamdeliciouslycaffeinated @mcu-avengerrs @archy3001@mmauricee @barnesvogue @feelmyroarrrr @beyondbarnes @marvelous-avengers @veronicalei @cornflax01 @kudosia @witchymarvelspacecase@beccaanne814 @inumorph @thisismysecrethappyplace @artemis521@darkhologramblaze @palaiasaurus64 @awkwardfangirl2014@diinofayce @youclickedthislink @lille-kattunge @patzammit @amiquette @destiel-artemis @nea90sweetie@miraclesoflove @nickimarie94

The Ravens Tags:

@eyeofdionysus @lauxeyson @riptidethepen @17marvelousfreak @izzy-obwan@bellasett @4theluvofall @jasura @eternalanxious @holding-on-to-francis @ladydork @ex-bookjunky @kiwi71281 @jokesonjess@whatthehellisacastiel @heter-no-sexual @indaybella99 @blacwings-and-bucky-barnes @greenhands5 @finding–grace @movingonto-betterthings @wearethecanadians @mysticracoon @fuckthatfeeling@bookgirlunicorn @thisheartbeatsonlyforyou

#Rockstar!loki #loki fic #loki x reader #reader x loki #loki fanfic #tom hiddleston #mcu #marvel #loki #loki odinson #loki laufeyson #loki of asgard #loki of jotunheim #the ravens #rockstar!au

23 notes · View notes

ravenaveira · 4 years

Note

Okay I get why you might not like Alisha from ToZ, but you hate /Luke/?????? I cannot understand. Why do you hate Luke I gotta know

Ok Im gonna be honest and admit Im a little biased when it comes to Luke, and when I say little I really mean ALOT lol I’ll explain

First off he started off pretty bad but I could already tell he was going to develop as his journey went on and I was right, I was really proud of his development and growth. But then he got all those people killed, ignoring everyone who tried to warn him because of his arrogance which caused everyone to hate him for a short time and rightfully so, hell I was pissed at him still even AFTER they forgave him.

But after he cut his hair and really resolved to change and actually put in the effort, I started to like him again, I really admired his growth and that he acknowledged he screwed up instead of continuing to make excuses for it, he effed up, he realized his mistake and took responsibility for it and worked hard to change. It reminded me somewhat of Zuko’s redemption arc in Avatar with how he kept messing up at first but then realized where he went wrong and did his best to change, I respect that.

So how did I grow to dislike Luke after all that? well as I said Im very biased against him for one reason and one reason only.

Asch

Now from the very beginning we know theres more to Asch than meets the eye, theres a reason he and Luke look so much alike but we just dont know what yet, then when we find out things only get worse from there as we slowly find out his backstory and what happened to him. It was so bad it actually made me dislike Luke because he essentially took literally EVERYTHING from him, although unknowingly the fact is he still stole Asch’s entire life.

His fiance, his kingdom, his best friend, his parents, even his name, literally everything. Asch was kidnapped and forced to go through agonizing experiments to create that replica Luke that they used to replace him and take over his life while Van continued to use and abuse Asch for his own gain. And what happens when Asch finally escapes and makes his way home? he sees his family and friends all moved on happily with his replica, that was beyond sad and hard to watch.

So where my bias comes in is that I like Asch more than I like Luke, why? because Asch is the original and he also just has a way more interesting backstory and personality compared to Luke who pretty much had it made his entire life and took it for granted, replica or not Luke still had it far easier than Asch did. His only real struggle was trying to have his own identity while Asch was trying to cope with having his stolen, which was a far more compelling dilemma in my opinion that I felt could have used more focus.

There was even one point in the game where everyone was against Luke and spent time with Asch in his place for a while and it just felt awkward, Guy and Natalia were originally friends with him, not Luke but at the end of the day, Guy sides with Luke and basically ditched Asch for the copy, which Asch even says he expected him to do. Even so, Guy siding with Luke over him clearly hurt him since that WAS originally his friend, even Jade points it out.

Yes its understandable since he spent more time with Luke after Asch was taken but at the same time it just felt like nobody really gave much thought to Asch’s situation and that somehow Luke was just far more important than Asch even though he’s the original whose life was stolen from him. To me, Asch was just treated beyond unfair and he just accepted it because he felt like he was inferior and had no place with them now. Just the charred remains of who he once was.

Natalia at least made the effort to reach out to Asch more than anyone else did and understood him even though he pushed her away, at least she was the only one who truly tried to console and reach out to him over the ordeal whether he accepted it or not. Luke did too but to be honest thats the LAST person he wanted to listen to for obvious reasons.

Yeah Asch pushed them away but nobody but Luke and Natalia actually took the time to see things from his perspective and tried to empathize with him, he was literally all alone through everything so its understandable why he has such a hard time with ‘teamwork’.

His attitude, like Lukes, is completely understandable when you look at their upbringing. Luke was royalty and behaved like an arrogant spoiled brat because of his privilege and lack of knowledge about the real world, so him being an asshole at first makes sense.

Asch was cold and impersonal at first because he was being groomed to be the ruler of Kimlasca but was also treated coldly by his father, then he was kidnapped at a very young age and experimented on to create a replica that completely highjacked his life and took all his friends and family away from him. So for him to be cold, distant, apathetic and rude makes total sense given what he’s been through, why wouldnt he be resentful towards Luke especially but everyone else too? he felt abandoned and forgotten and worst of all replaced, who wouldnt feel bitterness after that? in many ways, he even felt inferior to Luke which only rubbed salt in the wound.

But even with all of that, ALL OF THAT, I still liked both but just liked Asch more, however, something happened that made it impossible for me to like Luke anymore and forever hate him for it.

Asch dies, and Luke lives, that is unforgivable.

Now listen, I know it was foreshadowed but there were several things that happened that made this impossible to accept. Starting with the fact that near the end of the game all the replicas were supposed to die, keyword ALL so that includes Luke, so it was also foreshadowed that Luke would die as well. Asch from the side effects of the replication and Luke because replicas tend to be unstable and fall apart eventually which is why formicry was banned, yet in the end, only Asch dies and in one of the worst ways possible

He lived in constant pain and suffering both physical and emotional and now he dies in excruciating pain and suffering too, why? protecting Luke, and not just that, but from an experiment he never signed up for and was forced to go through, that was beyond unfair and unforgivable.

His whole life he has lost and sacrificed everything, EVERYTHING because of Luke, not only could he not live his own life but he couldnt even die his own death either. Luke got to live his life and got to escape his death and he’s the friggin replica who was supposed to die with all the rest, make that make sense to me.

The original dies but the fake lives even though its said replicas are unstable and doomed to fall apart eventually and we see it happen to every single human replica except for Luke, I just cant accept that.

They even have the nerve to leave the ending ambiguous where it sort of seems like Luke and Asch fuse and its left open-ended where you could assume its Asch or Luke but we all know its Luke because he goes directly to Tear in the end which doesnt make sense for Asch to do if it was him so Im just…UGH!!!!

So you wanna know why I dont like Luke? because he got to have everything Asch lost, he took everything from him and Asch literally gets nothing in the end, everybody moved on, Asch couldnt go back, Asch was slowly dying anyway from the experiment and Luke just gets to have everything in the end. He stole Asch’s life and in the end, he gets to keep it while Asch just dies protecting his copy, I just cannot accept that.

Its just unfair that Asch had to give up everything and Luke has to give up nothing, he really doesnt lose anything in the end, only Asch does. I know that sounds weird and a little sadistic but it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth ya know? the original dies having everything taken from him while the replica lives on with virtually everything? did Asch really get anything besides suffering in the end? no, thats where my hatred stems from.

So yeah my hatred for Luke stems from my bias for Asch, its not so much that Luke did something BAD that made him unlikeable but more like the ending the creators chose made me dislike him because I found it unfair and wanted Asch to have a happy ending too after all he’s been through but in the end, he dies because of something he had no control over and was forced to go through while Luke gets to go on living happily with everyone in the life Asch will never have, that is unacceptable.

So yea sorry this is so long but I wanted to go over how my admiration and respect for Luke turned to hate, its really of no fault of his own but the ending itself. I also hate that the fandom prefers Luke over Asch or even hate him when he’s the victim of so much but eh to each their own, but that just saddens me that even amongst the fandom Asch gets the short end of the stick while Luke gets all the praise.

Long story short this game just destroyed me lol which is why its my favorite Tales of games in the entire series despite my hatred for the ending, it was such a rollercoaster of emotion and pain that it really stands out from all the other Tales of in the series and IMO Tales of the Abyss is the best out of them all thus far and will always remain one of my top favorite games of all time. It’s such an underated gem.

#tales of the abyss #asch #luke #rave responds #kikml2

9 notes · View notes

ofcloudsandstars · 4 years

Photo

This week was a wild Samhaintide ride. I’ll post more about it in the read more

Here's yet another selection of stories from my witchy life I am ready to dump on you all so get ready lol:

Wednesday night was the party at the occult shop Treadwells where we met a new witch friend who joined us for the Samhain festivities. I have already made a post about it here but her name is Letitia and she is a beautiful sapphic Taurean witch who loves gardening and cooking (duh she's a Taurus) and all the goddesses she worships and bought an incredible pumpkin pie to the ritual.

Halloween

So the day begun with me making candles for the ritual. I bought a skull candle, a candle the shape of a jackolantern and then I made several candles which were three mini pumpkins hollowed and filled with black wax that’s pumpkin and bourbon scented, then four tea light spell candles with black wax and four tea light spell candles with a special wax my sag witchy friend bought for me from Edinburgh from a witchy shop. The wax melt was made with herbs and was called 'thinning the veil'. I’ll elaborate later. I also had to walk to the post office to pick up the ouija board. I had a feeling I'd finally get my hands on it on Halloween. Its a very aesthetic round one and I was excited to use it.

We chose to gather in Queenswood in the north of London. It was already SUPER SPOOKY cause there was a murder nearby so all of the buses were being redirected lol. We gathered all in black with our witch hats and delved deep in the woods. It was so beautiful and the ground was completely coated in gold and red leaves so you couldn't even see the path. We found a clearing in the thick of the woods with an old tree that grew sideways so it made a semi circle. We made a HUGE circle that we drew in the earth with a dead stick and went over with dragonsblood incense and black salt.

We opened the space by lighting the pumpkin candles and begun with centering our energy. There were several parts to the ritual we planned, but first we begun with a 'putting it to rest' spell since autumn is the time to let things go and samhain is about death so it was like officially bringing things to an end. We wrote down what we wanted to end in our lives on a piece of paper (such as not seeing coworkers from a toxic job that someone was leaving or the retrograde made my friend run into her abusive father that she had binded from seeing her for YEARS so she wanted to put that situation to rest) and ignited it in my cauldron. When it burned down to ashes we chose a spot (under a goblin-like tree) outside of the circle to open the earth and bury it in. After we put it in it's grave we all said a few words of departure and said: rest in peace. lol.

In my case I wrote down names of these models that are obsessed with this Italian guy (who is the son of a huge fashion designer) who is in love with my sister. They are obsessed with him for his connections to the fashion world and that he is rich and are jealous of any 'hoes' he's currently into so they posted instagram stories on Halloween with them in witch hats taunting that they were going to curse him and all of his lovers or whatever in cutesy filters and my sister knows I practice witchcraft so she told me. So I binded and banished them and the next day they unfollowed her lol.

Anyway, afterwards we focused on what we should reflect on by pulling tarot cards for mercury retrograde in scorpio that was beginning on that day as it's going to be like two weeks of descending into our own underworlds. After we got a card we lit the black tealight candle as a road opening spell to manifest a helpful path with overcoming our retrograde's lessons.

Then I lit the skull candle and we had a moment to reflect on our ancestors and those that we loved that have been lost that year. We each shared stories then lit the white tea light candles with the wax that was for thinning the veil. When we lit it we thought about our loved ones or ancestors.

Finally we did a dance for thinning the veil. I had flying devil oil that was some fragrance oil I got from a hoodoo shop and we dressed ourselves with it and ran around the circle and chanted in the leaves. We then ate the pumpkin pie the lovely Taurean witch bought also some maple sugar fudge she bought (what a champ), and halloween candy. We used the Ouija board but it was really challenging. We thought maybe it was cause we needed to be less grounded so we put it away and cleaned up the ritual space and headed off.

The Taurean witch was going to head home to cook a feast, my French aries witch friend went to her friends she's staying at to have a party and my Sag witch friend went home to cook a dumb supper for her and her mom. I went back to my place to nap then get ready for the night. I met my Sag friend at a music venue to watch Honeyblood which is SUCH a witchy band. The performance really reminded me of some scooby doo hex girls shit. It was a lot of fun (until some grown ass men with no sense of self awareness took the mosh pit to mean something more of a Jailbreak riot and started throwing their whole 6ft man bodies everywhere despite not everyone being gladiator sized. It was really ridiculous but golden when Honeyblood sang "Glimmer" with lyrics like "she can put a hex on you" thats when this one guy in some sailor outfit shoved his body into us and we BOTH looked at him with such evil at the same time and he like.. stopped.. and like hastily moved to another part of the room..) If you don't know Honeyblood you should listen to them, they are such a babe witch band.

We then went to a bar nearby to get flaming shots of absinthe as its a personal tradition (also a way to 'cross the veil') and someone took candids of us at the bar! (I added the picture above), for some reason we really caught the attention of everyone though we just were in witch hats like EVERYONE was like: OOO WITCHES and like we even had some lady take pictures of us at the bar? Like ok it was cute I guess. My friend was drunk then so every time someone was like: oo a Witch! She'd holler back YASS BITCH 365 24/7!!!! Like o' dear.

Final part to the night was the house party my Aries witch friend (she's the one who's apartment I almost burned down once when I was making spell candles). It was a place around the corner from mine with a host who was HIGH OFF HER FACE on drugs. There was the counter of alcohol that kept us going all night, we had a lot of mingling with everyone there then when it started to get a little less wild we claimed an empty bedroom and tried the ouija board again since we were definitely less grounded than in the forest. Unfortunately the results were still a bit weak but we got a little bit of consistency with movement. There was some guy there that seemed interested but as time went on it turned out he was more interested in me than the board. I am a touched starved human being and he was playing with my hair and I was drunk so I did not care then after we ended up kissing while my other witchy friends and some new comers were chatting about the dead. My Aries witch friend lives on the other side of the city so she asked if they could stay at mine and I was like yea plus it was like 4AM at this point and this guy was getting very handsy like I just wanted my hair to be played with so I was like ok nice meeting you I gotta go. And He was like oh no please come say one last goodbye. I was too drunk to realize that he was in the bathroom and he closed to door to make out with me and I was like this is nice you do have nice flowy long hair that covers your big shiny forehead that I am now noticing in this bright fluorescent lighting but I gotta go. And he's like: No I wanna take you home I wanted to the moment I saw you. And he WHIPS OUT HIS DICK AND SAYS: this is for you. I am DYING like honestly I found it hilarious, I was so drunk I like forgot that there were other people on the other side of the door so I barge out of the bathroom like: WE ARE GOING HOME and my witchy friends saw his dick and were howling with laughter and that 10 minute walk home they would NOT LET ME BE IN PEACE about it.

Samhain Day

Anyway my friends stay over and in the morning I make tea and a light breakfast since we are hung over and we watch The Worst Witch 1980s Halloween special where we fucking Howl at laughter at everything especially Tim Curry flying around in that Cape. The rest of the day is really quiet since most of it is me sleeping trying to recover from the day before.

At 4 PM I call my relatives to say I love them and stuff cause I felt like my closest relatives on the other side of the veil wanted that. I made a feast for myself which consisted of Mashed sweet potato, a salad of chopped royal gala apples, carrots and beetroots and duck sauteed in maple syrup and bourbon. It may sound sweet but the bourbon balanced it out and duck tastes a bit sweet so it blended well with the maple flavor. After I had sticky toffee pudding for dessert. I made a plate for my ancestors and then got ready for fireworks with my other witchy friend who is the sound healer at Alexandra Palace.

I nearly missed the MASSIVE fire effigy burning cause the commute there was a NIGHTMARE since everything was still being redirected. (Thanks mercury retrograde). The fireworks were incredible though. There were so many it was like being bombarded with fiery psychedelics. My friend still wanted to show off her sexy angel outfit for Halloween so I asked if she wanted to hang out with us tomorrow night to party.

Saturday Night

She came over like at 4 and we got ready. She looked a bit like the angel from the remake of Romeo and Juliette with Leonardo decaprio but in lingerie with a long white lace robe. I dressed as a poltergeist though I don't think it came off that way but I had a sheer black dress on with a skeleton body suit, a glow in the dark wig and pale tulle. I just wanted to be a spooky ghost. We had to sneak into a members club that I work at cause I am NOT allowed to be there and I was terrified of them finding out so it felt like Danger Partying. They had a day of the dead party so I blended in but I felt like some staff that recognized me were like staring at me all night. We still had fun and spoke about our Samhain experiences. My friend is also a medium so she gave me some ouija tips so hopefully that can help me in the future.

Sunday Morning

I went to a workshop in the food forest about fire starting!! It was beautiful and magical and the forest was in full autumn mode. I learned how to chop wood with different axes and carve wood and start fires with either two pieces of wood (which is extremely hard on your own like you better be in the dryest place possible and you better have a bow), and how to start fire with flint/magnesium which is 1000% easier would highly recommend. There's so much magic in nature and so much magic in those workshops. We learned which trees were best for firewood and which were toxic and how to use bark or forage for fire starter materials. I am getting more drawn to fire as an element to work with in magic so I loved learning the techniques and also that you can start fires with the back of a knife (the teacher had a specific wood carving knife that was thick) so its like if you get a specific Athame which is ruled by fire you could also use it to start fires too if you got a fire steel key. (It's a rod of magnesium and you'd strike it with the back of the knife hard and fast and sparks will shoot out like fireworks).

Anyway that was my week so far!! It was so much fun and adventurous I couldn't have asked for a better experience. I have today off so I had a moment to reflect and get myself together for work tomorrow but afterwork I am celebrating Bonfire night with my sag witch friend at Victoria park so I am excited to take part in that!

I hope you all had a great Samhain!

#halloween #personal #samhain #celebrations #I wish like every sabbat was this eventful #some parts could have been a movie #Some parts I wish I was more in the moment for but it was also a bit emotional with the retrograde

12 notes · View notes

julie-thefatones · 3 years

Text

Ghost of You || Luke X Reader || Part 1

Hello everyone!! welcome to my first Fanfic pretty much.... im really nervous about posting it, and really hope you guys like it! Im going to warn you that there are some punctuation mistakes, and probably some misspelled words, and run on sentences... but nobodies perfect eh? lol anyways Enjoy! please let me know what you think, I am already writing part 2 so if this goes well ill post that soon :)

A/N: Your best friends with Julie, since the stamp was removed from the boys they are able to be seen by lifers at choice and can touch lifers at choice, but are still ghosts. You and Luke grow closer and closer starting to go from friends to more than that and everyone starts to notice, it just takes a little longer for you two to figure it out.

Word Count: 2,352

First day of school is always hard, especially senior year.... big deal or its supposed to be. You have always had a hard time with school because it was just hard for you to focus, you were always thinking about what you would rather be doing like painting, singing, taking a walk, and most recently learning guitar which Luke had been more than happy to help you with. Luke, Luke Patterson he was a member of your best friend Julies ghost band, Julie and The Phantoms, which included members Luke, Reggie, Alex, and of course Julie. You always knew they existed but it wasn't until recently that you were really able to get to know them your self because until recently only Julie could see them. Ever since they had that curse of a stamp removed from them, they pretty much can choose whenever they want to be seen or touch anything. It has been nice, because now you can really be apart of your best friends new world, you also got to make 3 new really fun and funny friends, they were just as chaotic as you and Julie. You and Luke really clicked from the moment you and him were able to actually see each other, well he has always been able to see you, but this way was much better. Since you and Luke hung out all the time, you found your self spending hours with him a day. In fact thats where you were before school, was with Luke, you guys had this little place by a lake you loved to hang out at, which caused you to be late for your first day.

So deep in your thoughts you didn't even realize you made it to your locker until you heard the all so familiar tone of your best friend calling out your name as she approached your locker "y/n!!! I didn't even see you pull in" Julie said as she now rested against the lockers next to you "Hey Jules! sorry I over slept and was late" Julie rolled her eyes "On your first day! man you really setting the bar high this year" she said laughing at you, You laugh too at the obvious sarcastic tone in her voice "alright, alright!! ms setting the bar high, we better get to class" you say punching Julie playfully in the arm before heading down the hallway to class.

As you sat in class, you started to feel really bad about lying to Julie about the real reason you were late to school today, you just didn't know how to explain how much you and Luke have been hanging out with out her asking a million questions, but its not like it was a big deal. Trying to get out of your head you try to focus on Mr. Berty who was describing the different factors of algebra which you never understood anyway, so you just write notes in hopes that when you study it later you'll understand it.... which never happens either. As you're writing notes you notice something in the window, in the corner of your eye, not really thinking anything of it until you notice that the thing is jumping up and down and no one else is noticing which could only mean one thing. You look to the side and you see Luke in his orange beanie and Rush tank top jumping up and down waving his arms in order to get your attention with the biggest smile on his face, you laugh to your self, and then realizing he must want something, looking at the clock you realized you still had 40 mins left in this class *Oh my gosh! for real its only been 20 minutes!* you thought to yourself; quickly looking from the clock to the window where Luke was still jumping, you raise your hand "Yes ms. Y/L/N" you bring your hand down faster than you want to, slightly hurting it on the desk "May I use the restroom please?" you ask hesitantly, eager to know what Luke wants, Mr. Berty sighed with annoyance "If you really need to, I suppose, but make it fast ms. Y/L/N" you stand up a little to excited "Thank you mr. Berty" you said as you scurried out the door.

When you made it outside Luke stopped jumping, but his smile remained. You loved his smile, it was contagious, you noticed you were smiling too "Luke! what are you doing here" you said punching his arm playfully, he laughed and grabbed his arm pretending that the punch hurt him "Wow the abuse Y/N" with a smirk he continued "Someone help!!! im being abused someone help!!!" you roll your eyes and smack your hand over his mouth "Not that anyone can hear you, but shut up! that did not hurt" you say with a small laugh, as he is laughing underneath your hand "What are you doing here Luke?" you say with your hand still on his mouth, you feel his smile grow bigger underneath your hand "Well, Y/N, Im here because I got something for you!! but you have to come with me to get it" he said with pure excitement, still with your hand on his mouth, then he licked your hand to get it off, you pull away in knee jerk reaction, he smiled "Sorry! as much as I love your hand on my mouth we need to go!" he said eagerly, you laughed and rolled your eyes "Luke, you do realize im at school right?" he grabbed your hand pulling you across the school field "Yeah! but if you really cared about that, you wouldn't have come outside would you" he said, still with the biggest smile on his face, you rolled your eyes even more and gave in knowing he was right "Alright! but where are you taking me" you exclaimed, speeding up to be side by side with him instead of him dragging you, he looked at you, and bit his lip still excited "aha! you'll just have to wait and see" he said and you both smiled. As you kept walking you realized never Luke never let go of your hand from when he was dragging you..... not that it meant anything, it felt nice though.

It took about 15 mins to walk to you and Lukes usual spot by the lake, still holding hands you approached the tree you guys likes to sit by, or sit in depending on if you wanted to climb, which about 90% of the time Luke did.. also doesn't help he can just teleport up there if he wants to, where as you had to do it the hard way while he just laugh at you trying to climb up. This time Luke wasn't going up the tree, he let go of your hand, which kind of made you sad, but then you saw the look on Lukes face, which was pure excitement "Stay right here Y/N!" he said firmly grasping your shoulders to make sure you stayed in place, as he hopped over to the tree "CLOSE YOUR EYES!" he yelled from behind the tree grabbing something, but you obeyed closing your eyes and before you knew it he was in front of you, you could feel it "Alright, you can open" he said softly, you opened your eyes, and there Luke was with the same smile, holding an acoustic guitar, you could tell it was a nice one, just from the shine on it and how pretty the strings looked, you didn't even realize your mouth was wide open until Luke laughed "Ya like it?" he exclaimed, and you just looked at it "Is that for me?" you asked shocked and excited, Luke laughed "Is that for me?" Luke mocked you "Yeah its for you! ya dork" he continued as he hopped over around you, to get behind you so he could place the guitar in front of you for you to hold, you could feel his arms brush against you... which you like as much as the hand holding but, a little more ... again it didn't mean anything, he was just a friend... and Julies band mate. Luke continued talking taking you out of your trance "Ya never answered me though, do you like it" He said still behind you, but now you were holding the guitar, you just looked at it in awe "Where did you get this Luke? How did you get this?" you asked still in shock, Luke just laughed "Don't worry about that!" he said with a mischievous tone, and then you got worried "Luke you didn't ?!... you didn't steal this right!" you asked with actual concern, you wouldn't put it past him, he just laughed and in a teasing tone said "Ouch! you think I would do that Y/N.... Im not that bad!" and then he continued but more serious this time "No! I didn't steal it, Since I have this new found power of choosing when to be seen and stuff, I picked up a small job at the music store downtown, thought why not earn some money.... and then when you asked me to teach you how to play guitar, I wanted to get you your own.... sooooo I have been saving up ever since" he said in a soft tone and then you felt him come closer to you from behind, but now he was putting his hands on the guitar softly playing a melody, while pretty much holding you, as he played the melody you could feel his breath on your neck.... you guys have never been this physically close before, right before you got to lost into your thought Luke continued talking "You! still haven't answered the question though!!! do you like it??" he exclaimed with a teasing tone once again, which caused you to laugh, and you turned around in his arms making the current position pretty much a hug but Lukes holding a guitar "Of course I like it you dork!!" you said excited and continued "This is the nicest thing anyone has done for me...." you looked into his eyes and with a soft tone said "Thank you" he smiled, a soft smile, and his whole face became soft as he relaxed the guitar down by both your sides and looked deeper into your eyes "Of course...." he said softly, both of you just looking deeper into each others eyes, you felt some kind of connection, and you felt like you both were getting closer and closer to each other and then a voice came from behind both of you, causing both of you to shake out of the trance you both shared "Hey! Y/N! Luke! what are you guys doing out here?

You and Luke both jump, moving away from each other as you see Reggie come out of the trees eating a meatball sub. You and Luke look at each other confused as crap as to why Reggie was there and how he knew about it "Hey Reg!" Luke said a little nervous putting his hand behind his head messing with this beanie, you looked flustered flashing your eyes from Luke to Reggie and back to Luke who continued talking "the real question is what are you doing out here buddy?" and Reggie just chuckled a little, while taking another bite off his sandwich "Well, I went to the school to see Kayla like I always do, we like to eat lunch together, then I saw you two run off and thought I would follow" Reggie said with a full mouth, you and Luke shared a look "So you have been here the whole time?" you asked, wondering how you guys didn't notice Reggie was behind you guys the whole time, Reggie smiled a meatball smile since his mouth was still full and he answered "Yeah!! but I wanted to eat my sandwich so I decided to sit down in those trees and eat it" Luke looked at Reggie with a confused look "But Reg, isn't that your sandwich?" Luke asked still confused, and Reggie looked at him, again with a meatball smile "No! this was supposed to be Kaylas sandwich but since I didn't see her, because I followed you guys... I decided to eat it!" You and Luke laughed and Luke stepped forward patting Reggie on the shoulder "Kayla is one lucky girl Reg!" Luke said teasing Reggie, you laughed in response, and then Reggie went back to his initial question "So what are you guys doing out here?" he asked taking yet another bite of the sandwich, in which Luke got nervous again and answered Reggie with a slightly nervous tone "Hey! shouldn't you be getting back to the school, Kayla is gonna be wondering where your at bud" Reggie stopped chewing and his eyes grew big and he looked at Luke "Youre right! awww man, im gonna have to go get another sandwich" Reggie answered in a high pitched nervous tone "Ill see ya guys later!" Reggie said while running away nearly tripping over his own feet. You and Luke sighed and looked at each other, Luke smiled "Well should we get you back to school as well?" Luke asked you with a soft tone added with a light chuckle at the end, you nodded "Yeah, Lunch is gonna be starting soon and Julie is gonna be wondering where I went" you responded, and then looked at your guitar and looked back at Luke "I love my guitar Luke, I really love it!" you said as you wrapped your arms around his neck and gave him a tight hug, he responded by wrapping his arms around your wait pulling you in tighter, when you guys released from the hug you shared another look, quickly shaking it off with Luke responding "I cant wait to teach you some more chords on it!" he said back to his excited state from when you first got there, skipping forward grabbing your hand again as you guys walked back to school together.

#Julie and the Phantoms #jatp #jatp fanfic #Julie and the Phantoms fanfic #Luke Patterson #Luke Patterson fanfic #Luke Patterson x y/n #Luke Patterson x reader #Luke Patterson fanfiction #Charlie Gillespie #jatp fanfiction #julie and the phantoms fanfiction #im really nervous to be posting this but here goes nothing 💜#marys fanfic

106 notes · View notes

dulharpa · 4 years

Text

this is for hayley! @whistlingwillows a dear friend <3333

it’s meant to be a birthday present haha. i just want to shower you in love;;; so thought maybe i could go through as many of your fics and comment on them :^)))

(TO EVERYONE ELSE: please go to @whistlingwillows blog and read her fics!!! they are SO FCKIN GOOD AND AMAZING AND UGH HER MIND (it’s a lot of mcu and her bucky and steve fics are a*. i DEFINITELY RECOMMEND))

i wish you a VERY happy birthday and i hope we stay friends for many more years <3333333333

i’m going through your masterlist heehee ;)))

ah first off, nice theme! i never could rlly see it before because i’m always on mobile heehee. also sorry for not reviewing them before??? i don’t usually read fics on tumblr as you’ve probably guessed;;

anyways, IM GON REVIEW THE SHIT OUT OF THESE >:DDDD

far from home - bucky x stark sister!reader

firstly, i like how youre introducing the reader from buckys pov, like you can sort of already gather what shes like from them

‘Bucky can hear Tony’s soft inhale, feel the intensity of the man’s glare directed at Steve. He shouldn’t be eavesdropping, but a twitch of muscle would be enough to alert both men that he’s here. With the amount of tension crackling in the air, a brush against the wall would be equivalent to a thousand cymbals crashing in cacophony.’

IM CRYING ALREADY. the imagery in here is GLORIOUS. your tone here is so fitting! oo and the alliteration here is perfecto

ooooooo!! the backstory coming in 👀👀

‘despite what some people think that Steve and Captain America are two different personas, there will always be parts of Steve in the Avenger, and parts of the Avenger in Steve. They both want to believe in something good. They are, after all, one in the same.// Just as how Bucky and the Winter Soldier are the same man despite everything. HYDRA simply amplified the hate, fertilized the seeds of rage, curated the quiet thunder within his soul, within James Buchanan Barnes so that the Winter Soldier could thrive.’

yIKES! lol this is very character study like! nICE. it hurts tho, my poor children, i love you both

oo ‘starlight eyes’ that is a very nice way of describing them

‘“Then what was London?” The protesters. “São Paulo?” The earthquake. “Vancouver?” Freezing cold water.//“Look, I care if Stark’s gonna run us over trying to find her. I care enough because she’s part of our team. Come off it, Steve. I know she can take care of herself. I’m gonna take a nap. Dr. Cho said no partying post-Singapore and what do you know, we throw the biggest party ever.’

ooo singapore uwu and london? (coincidence? haha jkjk) and the hints abt reader and buckys background are so good?? but so annoying??? like i just wanna KNOW yknow??

‘The water runs copper and the sting bites at his palm as he tries not to think. Tries to focus on the numbing cold that runs over his skin.’

your imagery is so vivid?? im actually in awe??? i am so regretful i havent kept reading your fics. like i know they are amazing, i just keep putting them off??? idk man. hopefully this makes up for it (gd tho, im still not done with commenting on one fic. this is what im doing with my motivation teehee ;)

‘ He feels weak. Tired. He wants to go back to bed but he also wants to stay out in the sun for a few hours more. The sun kisses his skin through the windows and he squints against the blue sky, wondering ‘

mood during this quarantine lol

‘“Oh, right.” Your voice is flat, uninterested, cold, as you stare at him. “You killed my parents.”Shit.‘

OUCH LMAO THATS C O L D, O GOT +100 PHYSIC DAMAGE FROM JUST READING THAT

ooo robin as a nickname noice. very much gives me batman vibes lol

oh! and the way of doing the ‘flashback’ is neat! very original. it both tells us what happened AND buckys reaction to it again. he can re-analyse himself and reader. very cool

‘If you walk away now, don’t bother coming back!” Silence. Bucky can hear his own strained breathing, your soft sigh as you soaked in his ultimatum.’

👀👀 yikes that ultimatum. :// not good bucky. tbf theyre both trying to hurt each other but Yikes

eyy!!! readers pov!! finally! and the switch after we find out the outsiders pov? brilliant

oh no :(( more angst

‘When’s the last time you saw your therapist?”“Don’t have one. I’m perfectly capable of taking care of myself.”’ they BOTH need therapists;;;;

very good fic!!! :DD they rlly do hate each other! i definitely like how you went back and forth with the timeline! it gave me a v strong idea on what yn was like even before we rlly got introduced. i am now very curious on where reader is? i love your characterisations!

i will read the 10k+ fics but heck the last one took me ages lolol (i will comment in the future tho!! i promise <3 ) (that took me over an hour jjhghgdjh)

slipping away- amnesiac modern bucky x reader

omg,,, AMNESIA! >:DDDDDD

‘ Put your fucking seatbelt on’

oh no, istg theyre going to have a car crash arent they (’ doesn’t put the seatbelt on to spite you.’ NO PLEASE PUT IT ON U DUMBASS)

ok,,,,, at LEAST he put it on before he got hit, thank heck. but still. youre so cruel to your poor characters lmaoo

oh gosh

‘You fall apart slowly, like pieces of you peeling away until you’re nothing more than your broken heart. The sobs that wrack your body are relentless and you shove your forearm into your mouth to muffle your cries. You want to bite into your skin. You want to distract yourself from the agony tearing you to shreds. You want to feel anything but the pain.///Tears sweep into your hair, cloud your vision and your whole face floods with heat as you try to breathe through the pain. You’re cleaved into pieces on that bed, eyes squeezed shut as the tears keep flowing, and your throat burns’

this hurts damn, it is so vivid?? i can really feel it

i am so glad you got into writing yk?? so glad

NO PLS, TELL HIM. TELL HIM :((( ‘shes nice once you get to know her?? shes known nat for years now!! years!!

oh god ‘he looks younger without the burden of your time together’ this is so angsty omg

‘Well, he was stumbling through his apology and I just let him finish.” Your body fills with warmth as you remember his embarrassed smile, the way he shoved his baseball cap farther down his head, chin tucked to his chest, trying to hide that face. “When he was done, I opened my mouth to say something polite but what came out was ‘You look like someone I’d very much like to kiss’.”

this is so soft i stg im crying in the club

OH SHITTTTTTTTTTT , you left it off like that!!! thats so cruel!!!! i can’t!!! how dare you!!!! :””””””((( im typing this with tears in my eyes ill have u know!!

anyway!!! very good fic!! you could honestly make that into a longfic very easily lol. i felt too many emotions :((

i was just about to say where is the fluff!! where is it!! when i saw the next one and yay :))) pls i cant have more angsty stuff rn

cookies and rings and things bucky and reader

‘how much do you love me?’ ‘count the snowflakes, multiply by a million’

did you have to start the fic off with such a SOFT line? its so soft! so TENDER

‘He wonders what kinda insane person wears socks without any clothes on, but then decides that it’s the kind of person who’s fallen in love with him.’ jesus, the soft moments filled with love are the greatest <3

you can write fluff so well, whyd you have to pain me with all that angst ;””””) (1/10 hurt, 9/10 comfort is the way to go lolol) (jkjk ill read the angsty ones too when i have the spoons) (gonna reread that hydra steve one and ik thatll fuck me UP)

‘ Then, he can feel the cold metal of the ring she slid onto her own finger less than twenty-four hours ago and realizes that he had thought a lot of things shouldn’t be possible, and yet they still are. ‘

you literally brought me to tears reading this softness, you have truly found my weakness

‘ She’s so damn gorgeous with flour on her face and eye bags beneath her eyes that he’s sure she will inevitably make his heart burst ‘

he already likes her so much! i can’t believe this is affecting me so much :’)

‘Bucky is quite sure Sam is in love with his girlfriend in the fact that he’s in love with the fact that his girlfriend is possibly in love with Bucky’

this is so soft??? sam loves reader bc reader loves bucky sm. pls my hear <3333

you do fluff SO WELL DAMN

‘F.R.I.D.A.Y.’s voice echoes in his small little perch and he still thinks it’s weird without having the side effect of Stark in his suit chasing after him to hear the A.I. but he shoves that uncomfortable feeling of the dead man out of his head. That is too much regret to unpack right now on a mission. ‘

yike bringing back that reminder oof

but thats so soft??? (i am def overusing soft but,,,,, i love it and the vibe) she sent him cookies! god i can feel the love

‘She expresses her feelings through cooking, which Bucky has learnt the hard way. One time, they got into an argument over something stupid—he can’t even remember what started it—and came to the kitchen at 2AM to see her sitting at the kitchen island crying her eyes out and surrounded by baskets of muffins.’

<3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 <3 my hEART

you show how much they love each other in so many ways??? i am dying

“Alright, I like it.” Rolling his eyes, he pecks her forehead and she smiles victoriously. It’s so adorable that Bucky, with less than three hours of sleep, adds, “God, I want to marry you.//”“What?”//Oh.Shit.

oh my god! i am literally tearing up!!! AGAIN!!!!!!!!

oh shit o am literally crying

your fluff got me crying harder than your angst i hope youre happy

I really hope you enjoy reading this?? i keep forgetting to like text you but i wanted to do something for your birthday. especially in quarantine when everythings gone crazy. one year i swear ill do something REALLY good for you. not making promises bc i hate if i dont. but ill like, learn how to podfic because you D E S E R V E I T

ive spent like three hours doing this lolol

thank you so much for everything hayley!

#i love you sm hayley!!!! thank you for EVERYTHING #AND THIS IS A FIC REC PLS CHECK HAYLEYS STUFF OUT

1 note · View note

jellyfishdooter · 5 years

Photo

LISTEN

I HAVE VERY LOW IMPULSE CONTROL

In spite of the current community fire I give you this Rise of the Guardians AU

Character explanations/ mini story under the cut

So after watching Rise of the Guardians (one of my fav animated movies) I got the idea for an AU where the egos are like the Guardians of the JSE community.

Their designs are based off/ inspired by the characters in the movie but instead of just drawing the egos as those characters, I more so let them inspire re-creations of their outfits/ powers

Chase: Jack Frost- Guardian of Family

In the beginning he doesn’t see himself as a guardian. He’s a screw up, a washout. But even through his depression he tries to make others happy before himself. He does this by having fun and trying to get those in the community to join in with him! It’s later on that he realizes he has a part to play and that his is making sure everyone is still together as one big community. He’s here to remind us that in troubling times that we all have each other- that we’re all family.

JBM: Santa- Guardian of Hope

Being the super hero of the group, it’s JBM’s job to protect the innocent and give off the appearance of being something people can depend upon- someone who can protect everyone from danger. He helps the community become strong and makes them laugh along the way (even if he has to make a fool of himself to do it, he loves our smiles)- he gives them hope.

Marvin: Tooth Fairy- Guardian of Creativity (Sams: small Tooth Fairies)

Much like tooth fairy in the movie, it’s Marvin’s job to collect fanart/ fanworks and store them so when the community forgets all that they have built together, he shows them. Not only that, he inspires the content creators and represents their passion for their art. And it’s what he protects. (Along with the help of the little Sams who are the ones who actually collects and re-distributes it so everyone can see what they’ve made.)

Jameson: Sandman- Guardian of Positivity

Arguably one of the most important guardians of the community, JJ is there to remind people the importance of PMA. In his own quiet ways, he encourages the members to think on the bright side- or is just there to give hugs and be there for them. Whenever someone is in such a dark place, he uses his powers to show them that they still have so much potential and that they’re not alone. He give them a light in a dark place to hold onto. (Yes, he uses sign language AND the sand symbols for those who don’t understand sign)

Schneep: Bunny- Guardian of Health

Being the good doctor of the group, he’s there to remind the community to take care of themselves. Yes he may be a lil aggressive in the way he gives out advice, but for a lot of people they need their butts a little kicks to get them moving to help themselves. But not only physical health, he’s also willing to sit down and talk about mental health and analyze what the problem is/ works to help you understand how to improve yourself.

Anti: The Boogieman- “Guardian” of Fear and Chaos

And last but not least, our dear little firestarter. For so LONG he’s waited, waited to be in the spotlight. Before the other egos show up it was just him and it was delicious. He had so much power as he fed off of our fears, insecurities, and of course the headcanons and theories we made about him. But then Jack HAD to make more egos and fill the community with positivity and light. So he sunk back and waited for his opportunity- he waited for his powers to grow strong in the background. And with all of the hints being dropped and community fueling the fire in a continuous positive feedback loop, he gains more and more strength every day. He reminds the community not everything is peachy and rosy. That there are awful things in the world and how you’re just a tiny ripple in a storming ocean. Insignificant. He doesn’t want to stamp out the community- that would be counterproductive. No he just wants them to feel fear for the channel- that nothing is safe anymore- at any turn he could be there. And with that everything always comes back to him.

And sooner or later, the others will fade away...

Extra Headcanons/ Tidbits:

Before they were all guardians they were other people. (TW: death and suicide mentions) -Anti was a reckless criminal and one night his “friends” betrayed him, leaving him behind which wound up being the end of him. They were running from the police and were trying to jump a tall fence when his comrades left the struggling man behind to take the fall. He did in more ways than one. -JBM was just a regular dude, but he sacrificed himself to save a kid getting hit by a bus in the city. Even though he was about to die he kept asking if the kid was okay. The medics told him he saved them and that’s all he needed to hear. -Marvin was a street magician in his time. He did tricks to cheer up people sitting on the sidewalk/ sitting alone and talked to them about their passions. Later the same people would come back and tell him about the new job they got or the current project they were working on. He pulled a teen off the side of a bridge and a local cop mistook it for him attacking her and.. well.. things escalated quickly -Henrik was an upstanding surgeon. He saved lives every day in his career. Even though his wife and child left him, he worked every day to become a better doctor and continued to save people. And after the surgeries he would personally counsel the patients to make sure they were okay physically and mentally. But one day.. they didn’t have a matching organ for the patient on standby.. and he knew he matched the credentials. -Jameson was a small movie star in his time. And when he wasn’t filming he went down in quiet to lift the spirits of homeless children and teens. He would put on small performances and then go around to each of them and comfort them if they said it was okay. He made sure by the end of his visit they were all in high spirit. But one day the filming studio caught fire. The smoke damaged his lungs so he couldn’t call out before the building collapsed. -And Chase... He had a loving wife and two kids who he cared for with his life. He vowed to himself to protect them, even though his wife turned into a bitch as the years went on. One night they were walking home from a day at the amusement park and Chase got jumped with his kids nearby. The criminal threatened to kill the kids if Chase didn’t comply. So to protect them, he did as the criminal said, handing over his wallet and watch and phone. And when the criminal was about to kill one of them anyway, instinct took over and Chase knocked the man down and knocked him out- but when he fell the gun went off

The lights on the globe are the septiclights, each one representing a person in the community

Instead of holidays, the guardians help in the background of charity livestreams and videos to give them that little extra spark.

Sean is the equivalent of the Man in the Moon

The extra fan-made egos (like Robbie, Shawn, Angus, and Bing) are still around, they just aren’t the big guardians.

If they were tho... Robbie- Guardian of Innocence, Shawn- Guardian of Voice, Angus- Guardian of... idk, Protection? Or maybe head cannons lol, Bing- Guardian of Online Connections

When too much of the community becomes afraid/ depressed, the guardian’s form changes (like in the movie) before they disappear -JBM: Becomes weaker, probably needs his glasses to see again, basically turned into a comicbook nerd -Marvin: Loses a lot of his color, magic goes away, turns into a cat? -Henrik: Hands continuously shake, gains a stutter so people can hardly understand him, becomes super paranoid/ closed off -JJ: His colors fade to black and white, it’s really hard to summon his powers, always about to cry/ wants to scream -Chase: Goes into a low state of depression, isolates himself a lot -Anti: His bravado diminishes- basically turns into an edgy teen with spasms instead of actual glitches, wound on his neck closes.

Like in the movie there’s a point where Anti takes over (like right now) and everyone’s powers start to fade

To make this angsty(er) he manages to kill JJ and he disappears, along with the light of positivity in the community.

Chase blames himself for not being fast enough to save him

To turn thing around Henrik suggests a charity livestream to promote a mental health organization. So they all work together to prep

A young community member somehow gets into Henrik’s realm

Memes and shenanigans ensue

“We spend all our time trying to protect the community, we don’t HAVE TIME-... for the community..?”

Chase runs off after young familiar voices calling out for their daddy

Chase ends up in Anti’s realm of fear(the opening is in the woods under an abandoned computer desk). It’s a series of twisted hallways bathed in red light and entire walls of glitching computer screens that cast weird shadows

When Chase gets out he realizes all the equipment is destroyed and he wasn’t there to help

Henrik blames Chase and sad dad runs off.

The community is plunged into a state of fire and fear and there’s no positivity anywhere to be found.

Except one last light...

A fan is talking to a Sam plushie, saying that yeah they understand why the stream COULD have been cancelled.. but everything in their life is just so dark they were really looking forward to it.

Chase finds them and uses his powers to make images of septic lights and funny moments in Jack’s videos

They realize it’s Chase who’s doing it and can see him

All the egos fight Anti with the help of a few community members beside them- giving them power to fight back.

The members bring back JJ

JJ kicks the ever living shit out of Anti with the help of the others beside him Okay I think I’ll stop here XD If you read all this... wowie!

333 notes · View notes

a-baleful-howl · 5 years

Text

I’m about to go full-on petty mode. So if you don’t care about my personal gloating and back-patting, scroll on by lol

This post contains spoilers for episode 1 of season 8, and also spoilers for my fic The Lone Wolf Dies.

I recognize this post is really only for me. I’m a salty bitch.

This is fanart the wonderful and lovely @cathcacen drew for me when I was at my lowest and receiving the most hate I’ve ever gotten for a fic.

I ranted about it for a bit, deleted the worst of the flames I could off of FFN, and I haven’t actually been back to FFN since this all happened. Don't think I havent noticed the love and support I got from the JonsaFam, either. I very much appreciated it, and I know many people enjoyed my fic (and are begging me to finish it...).

Here’s some highlights of the comments I received on FFN accusing me of being “unrealistic” or of committing “character assassination” (sad thing is, these aren’t even the worst reviews I got):

“Arya would never let Sansa or the Northern Lords do that to Jon[...]This story is making Jon a bit of a wimp and Arya willing to betray him even though she loves him more than Sansa.” [saphirablue25 on chapter 1]

“Another story about Jonsa, and Anti-Dany, and pro-norte and pro-stark? these crap stories are becoming common since season 7.[...]and this kind of stories, without any artistic or literary value, just deserve to be vilified. is just another excuse to be myopic and criticize character without reason, especially when it is already something practically canon that Jon / Daenerys will be in the books too, as one producer of the HBO series said, who was told George Martin. waste of time.” [flayjunior15 on chapter 1]

“this story is rubbish, more crap without sense…” [guest on chapter 1]

“This is character assassination. Arya Stark would never betray Jon Snow; no matter what;[...]Of course now it’s a Jon and Sansa pairing ignoring everything that happened in season 7 b/c why not?[...] The leaps you Jonsa writers take to mischaracterize daenerys just b/c you’re not getting the ending you want in the show or the books is a little ridiculous. You can’t write a story that’s based on show-canon and then ignore all obstacles presented in said canon just to put your two favorite characters together. That’s not how good storytelling works.” [FanofLogic (lol) on chapter 1]

“I don't think Arya would ever betray Jon, it's just not plausible.[...]There are gaping plot holes, that need to be seriously addressed, the writing and the punctuation are fine, it’s well spaced and makes sense in a linear sense, but in terms of plot and story, it crumbles to dust before you even finish reading the chapter in its entirety.[...]I don’t want to stop you from writing, that’s not my intention, you just need to sit back and ask yourself, if it really makes sense.” [carpenoctem20 on chapter 1]

“Well, I read your story. It is sad really because your writing style is good and enjoyable but the stupidity of your character's actions[...]Too bad, your writing is promising but the story lacks logic…[...]Also, thank you for butchering Arya’s character - she is my favourite and you completely ruined her.” [malb901 on chapter 1]

“I realize that this story is an AU because our characters are written not how they are portray in television or books…” [GUEST VIII on chapter 1]

“If your goal was to write Arya completely out of character and Sansa as a short sighted idiot with the northern lords as her peanut gallery...then good job. Otherwise your characterization needs a lot of work.” [guest on chapter 1]

“Arya...well how she is written is so absurdly offbase from canon you would have been better off write my that part as an of to avoid having preconceived about the character.” [guest on chapter 1]

“What a load of complete garbage. So much character assassination across the board is an injustice to GRRM’s work!” [guest on chapter 1]

“Another junk Jonsa story, I see that many of these losers, are very salty, because their crackship (because that’s the Jonsa, a crack) shipwrecked last season.[...]The author of this story is another salty loser with no sense, just like all the Jonsa fans of this crack ship.[...] even Arya has a stronger relationship with Jon than with any member of her family, she would care less about the North, even threatening to kill the Northern Lord, if they hurt Jon. Only two idiots of Jonsa, defend this story.” [JonsaSucks on chapter 1]

“Highly questionable characterization and plot holes big enough to fly a dragon through...pass” [guest on chapter 2]

“With Arya, she's so OC in this that it would have made more sense to make her a new character. She would never choose Sansa over Jon.” [saphirablue25 on chapter 2]

“So disappointing! This story is a complete disservice to anyone who is not a blind Sansa worshiper.[...]The plot holes don't do you any favors either.” [Zmrzlina763 on chapter 3]

“Poorly written, plot holes, unrealistic” [guest on chapter 3]

“What a pile of crap. So many plot holes and character assassination. You should be ashamed to publish such garbage.” [guest on chapter 4]

“I hated this story...thought it was really ridiculous.” [guest on chapter 4]

“I would highly recommend rereading GRRM’s work as it’s obvious you are basing your characterizations on contrived reimaginings with no basis in the work you claim to be a fan of. Please do us all a favor and quit polluting the fandom with this nonsense.” [guest on chapter 4]

And finally, for the piece de resistance!

“Oh boy that story became retarded real quick” [guest on chapter 1]

Now, I might be biased but my brain kept pointing out similarities to the first episode of season 8 and my fic - which I never claimed to be writing what I thought was really going to happen, but that this what I wished in a best case scenario would, my interpretation of all the info we got from Season 7, and it was always only ever supposed to be a Jonsa one-shot but it kept growing.

Now, one of the biggest complaints I got was “character assassination” - saying that the characters would never behave the way I wrote them to. This is mainly what I want to focus on as clearly the fic is not exactly the same as the episode - and I never expected it to be. Fanfic is fanfic for a reason. For one, Sansa and the North refuse Jon and Dany, and that's kind of the catalyst to everything else that happens in the fic. Thats a big change - so I’m not saying “My fic was exactly like the show!!” I just wanted to point out all the moments while watching the show I was like “See! I didn’t assassinate anyone’s character!” since that’s apparently a crime I was committing against all of fandom.

If you haven’t read the fic, I highly suggest you do since many of these quotes are small snippets taken from a bigger context.

All the text is from my fic, the pictures are the moments I thought were similar from the show.

Daenerys had chosen to forgo her dragons to mount a horse instead, as a show of equality and peace to the Northern people.

The Hound, Sandor Clegane, rode beside them, seemingly reluctant to be there, in his own way.

“Greetings,” she announced. “How gracious for you to meet us.” Though her words were not sweet - they never were - and she measured the air between the two parties cautiously.

“You’ve traveled very far,” Sansa responded, her horse shifting impatiently under her. Her voice did not waver, and it carried loud and clear across the void. “It would be rude of me to not turn you away personally.”

Daenerys remained silent.

“We know no King, but the King in the North whose name is Stark.” Lyanna Mormont bellowed from her own steed. Her eyes were glowering, stern and furious. Not little Lyanna…

“First the Wildlings, and now a foreign whore,” Lord Glover spat, his horse just as wide as he was. “You’re not a Northerner. You’re anything but.”

He looked to Sansa for an answer. Surely Sansa would not leave him to the wolves. Yet she avoided his eye.

“I missed you too, Jon…” she called back, and his heart knew that she meant it. “But Starks stick together. I know that now. What would Father think?” His heart broke. If only they knew…

Jon had warned her. He knew before heading to Dragonstone that the Northerners were not likely to kneel to a foreign ruler. Sansa had said so herself many times. He resisted the urge to gloat, to remind the Dragon Queen of his words.

“Sam?” he whispered. Surely he must be imagining it. Sam was here? In Winterfell? The round man came stumbling towards him, his arms waving madly by his sides to catch Jon's attention.[...] The two clasped each other in a strong embrace for a moment before Jon pulled back. [...] “Gilly?” Jon asked absently. “And the baby?” “They're fine!” Sam answered, finally with a dim smile. “They’re here.”

Arya . Oh, Arya! She’s safe. He frantically grabbed her, sweeping his hands over her hair and face, feverishly kissing the top of her head, thanking the old gods that she was here. Thank the gods his little sister was alive. She had wrapped her arms so tightly around him he could barely breathe.

“You leave him alone!” Arya barked, running swiftly down the hall towards them.

“Don’t you understand what this means, Jon?” Sam insisted. “You’re the heir to the Iron Throne.”

Jon didn’t care about that. Not now. Suddenly everything he thought he knew was a lie. His father- no, his uncle... had lied to him his whole life. This meant that Daenerys was his aunt by blood. And Sansa was his…

He suddenly felt very ill.

[...]Everything tasted bitter to him now. Everything he had ever known was a lie, but oddly, it made sense. Eddard had gone south to save his sister and had returned with a child. It made sense. How - how - had he not seen it before?

[...]People die and stay dead. That was a fact. Unless he had believed more lies than the one his uncle had told him his whole life.

He had traveled on horseback many times, but never alone. [...] When he drew nearer to Winterfell, the snow and winds were so strong he was forced to cover every inch of skin but his eyes.

“You look like you’ve seen the seven hells.”

“You don’t look any better,” Sandor replied. Jaime tried to ignore the slight. It was true he was unshaven, unwashed and frozen to the bone.

“It’s too late,” Bran interrupted. Jon’s blood ran cold at the words.

“What do you mean it’s too late?”

“The Wall is gone. Eastwatch is gone. There is a dragon that breathes blue fire.”

Now, I’m not trying to say “I’m Nostradamus and I guessed the entire first episode.” No. That is absolutely not what I’m saying. I thought I made an informed guess into how the characters might react to the events in season 7 and amongst each other, and used my own opinions on the characterizations to write a story based around one thing: Jon realizing he loved Sansa because she died. Everything else was secondary to me.

It’s only because I got such immediate and hostile push back to something I saw as obvious foreshadowing that made me feel so vindicated when the first episode had so many similarities to what I wrote. Anyone could have come up with these same lines as I did - because the evidence was there and the Jonsa fam was pointing it out the whole time.

I just reallllly hate how fanfiction, especially in ASOIAF and on FFN, has the default accusation of “character assassination” to use when you just hate a story, when all fandom characterizations are just opinions. Only the author of the original source material can decry character assassination. Fanfiction is everyone’s personal choices when it comes to things like this, and it appears that a whole shitload of Dany Stans descended on my story, and instead of saying “I hate Jonsa and Dany can do no wrong” they personally attacked me for horrible writing - when in fact I was the one more on point than they were. I never expected Sansa and the North to literally turn Dany and Jon away at the gates - but thats why I wrote a fanfic about it. Because that was the only way I was going to see it told.

I was so upset by this (can’t you tell? lol) that seeing this episode really made me feel good and feel more proud in what I wrote.

okay. rant over.

#original #text post #s8 #8.01 #my fics #the lone wolf dies #long post

53 notes · View notes

popopretty · 5 years

Text

Piko’s Spring Tour “Pathfinder” report

There are just so many things I want to write down for this live but I realized I would not be able to put everything into one post and I have also forgot some parts of it so please bear with my scattered memories.

I went to almost all the lives in this tour except for the one in Sendai. So it includes Nagoya, Osaka, Yokohama, Fukuoka and Tokyo. It is an amazing feeling following an artist on tour, like waking up in a different city everyday, meeting the fans you don’t usually meet but still being able to say “See you tmr”. For two weeks I was filled with Piko feels and I couldn’t really remember doing anything else.

KEEP READING - There is A LOT more under the cut lol

For most of the venues, there were like 150-200 people each. The final was in a bigger venue so there were more than that. There are girls, guys, couples, families, Japanese, foreigners, all kinds of people you can think of. And everyone is super nice and friendly. I still feel super awkward with my Japanese but people’s warmness there just calmed me a lot.

For the tour goods, there are T-shirts, mirrors, towels, mobile charger, tote bag and stuff from previous lives. If you buy one album, you will get a ticket to high touch with Piko at the end of the live. Plus there are chekis and if u are lucky enough you can get one with Piko’s sign.

My favorite thing from the goods this time must be the totebag. Its cheap and convenient since you can use it both as a handbag and a shoulder bag. The mobile battery is a new thing, which is a bit expensive imo but it works pretty well and has a super cute design so everything is forgiven xD I also bought 2 more CDs to get a high touch with him. I will write about it in more details at the later part.

Piko wears a different outfit every live. For the one in Nagoya, he wears the black outfit as in Black Swan cover, then in Osaka it was the white one as in Realizing. He is back to the black one in Yokohama and in Fukuoka is another white shirt with black gilet. He went with the Black Swan outfit for MOST of the final live lol. If you read my last posts, you have already known what else he was wearing xD

As for the setlist. The setlist is the same for all the small lives. Only the final is different so I’m gonna list out all the songs that he has sung in all the lives, not in the exact order.

- Realizing - This is the opening song for all lives.

- Loki - He sang this in all the small lives but not in the final.

- Ghost Rule

- HERO

- Tengaku - He sang this in the final only

- Re:Act

- Rolling Merry Go Round - this is also in the final only. I was so surprised when he sang it ;; this is also my first time listening to the song live ;;

- Dappo Rock

- Kachoufuei - This is one of my favourite songs in the new album

- Sakurane - This is also final exclusive! In one part he messed up the lyrics and he was super embarrassed so he laughed and asked the audiences to sing for him lol

- Black Swan - the most beautiful song live from the new album. Tbh I didn’t like the recording that much cuz the instruments are a bit too loud for me. But in the live it sounds much better and Piko’s voice just resonates around the live house and it is absolutely beautiful.

- Kokoronashi Acoustic - This is in the final only. He sang this song many times before but this time is totally different. He sang the first verse with no instruments at all and the acoustic guitar sound only came in in the second verse.

- Kasa - He sang it with a backup vocal of himself since it is a self-duet and many parts are overlapped. He sang the guy’s part with female backup in the first verse and then switched to the girl’s part with male backup for the second verse. In some lives, the fans even sang along with the backup parts which was really cute xDDD

After this part there is usually a small MC parts where Piko can talk and take a short rest before entering a non-stop session of about 4-5 rockish songs xD

- Murabito A - I love the song and the message in it. Whenever he gets to the “kamisama” I really just reached my hands towards him as if he is my God lol

- Futaiten Path Finder

- Lost One no Goukoku - I cant believe Piko covered it just recently! He sounds absolutely amazing in it. He didnt try to sing the original key (though I think he totally can). He chose a lower tone which showed off his beautiful, manly middle range and I love it so much. In the entry part of the song, he asked everyone to raise hand and shout out at the end of each drum session. He also asked the girls and the guys to do it separately. Even though there were only a few guys, they were really energetic, even when Piko asked them to say Yeah but in a girly cutesy voice. (They did it anyway lol!)

- Haikei Doppelganger - Of course this cannot be missed! This is like the most heated song in the live. Everyone was just headbanging like crazy. He just sounds absolutely powerful and precise for such a hard song that I lost my mind every time I heard it.

- Make Our Days - this is like a sequel to Make My Days. He mentioned that this is a song where he wants everyone to become one by doing the same moves. It is pretty similar to Make My Days and I dont know how to explain it in writing lol. So lets wait until some videos of it actually come out xDD He also asked all the band members to do that with different style every time and it was so funny (I will write more about it but probably in a separate post)

- Piscium - Last song before the encore. He spoke about the meaning of it, about how he started his career as a net artist, how it was in the beginning where they didnt really know what to do but try different things and see how it works. And it has been a long way with both joys and sadness and now he realizes that its not him walking alone, and that everything he does has the people who support him being a part of it. Thats why its not about him anymore but about all of us. Thats why Make My Day becomes Make Our Days, and Piscium lyrics also say “You made me. I made you”.

It was a beautiful moment…

Before the funny part kicked in xDDD

If you follow Piko, you might have already known that he has a corner called Pikone jinsei soudan in his namahousou, in which he puts on an okama personality and gives people advices on their problems xDD The live this time also has a session like that.

- Tokyo Shinobizaki

The first song of the encore is Tokyo Shinobizaki, which is an ending he sang for a short anime recently. It is a slow, jazzy and mature song, the type you may find in some old bars I guess. In the small lives, Piko would wear his live tour T-shirt, walk out and sing it with a stand mic. And he kept swaying and sliding his hands up and down the stand mic xD He has such lovely hands that my eyes kept fixating on them through out the song @@ In the final, when the music started playing, everyone was waiting for Piko to come out as usual, but it was just a band playing a super long intro. The live house for the final has a smaller stage on the right side that looks like a small balcony. And when the intro finally ended, Piko walked out from there, wearing a long red dress (the same one he wore in luz’s event not too long ago). He looked so pretty in that dress that everyone could have mistaken him as a girl without knowing him before >w<.

After he sang Tokyo shinobizaki, the jinsei soudan session started. Every live he would pick 2 letters from the fans and read it out loud (in okama voice) and then gave advices to them. All the band members also helped him out (and they also spoke in funny voices lol). There are many interesting questions but I think I will write about them in a separate post. I will just mention a few moments here. In the Osaka live, one fan was asking about how to deal with a rebellious son. And Piko was like “hmm I dont know. Should I ask my own parents??” and then he looked to the back of the stage, raised his hand and shouted out “Mama~~”. Turned out his mom was also there and all the lights of the stage started pointing to her xDD she then said that she actually didnt have to deal with Piko’s rebellious phase cuz he was a super good kid and didnt have that phase at all xDD In the final, Piko randomly picked a guy from the audience and asked him if he has any questions. The guy didnt have any, but he said that he brought his daughter to the live to see Piko. And Piko, still wearing that dress, rephrases his words like “Oh, so papa likes me, and papa wants his daughter to like me too so he brought her here?” He then asked to see the daughter. We all expected like a little grown up girl but turned out she was a super tiny cute little girl xDDD and Piko was like “ok lets get married” lol

- Yoshiwara Lament: Normally Pikone only sang Tokyo Shinobizaki but in the final she sang this one too xDD

After the Pikone part, Piko got into the backstage and changed again.

When he was inside the big screen started playing and they played a part of Black Swan MV which is coming soon.

And they also announced on the screen a two-man live with Pokota on November 4th this year!

2nd encore:

- Thanatos

- Hypnos: As some of you might know, Thanatos is the god of death in Greek mythology. Hypnos is his twin brother. Hypnos is a god of sleep. Piko said that the tour is like a dream. And when this tour end, everyone will wake up from their dream, go back to their everyday life. Thanatos is his first CD ever released, but Hypnos is the future. He will keep moving forward and come back, being a stronger and newer Piko. He asked for a title call and wrapped up the live with that song.

After the live came the high touch. I did it 3 times. One time was in the first live in Nagoya. I didnt buy the CDs but one friend of mine was kind enough go give me one of her tickets. The high touch is super short. You touch hand with him and say one sentence or two and thats it. I kept thinking what to say in Nagoya and ended up telling him “I LOVE YOU” in English lol. Second time was in Fukuoka. I did’t plan to buy a CD that day but that was 3rd day of the 3-day-in-a-row lives that Piko performed in (Tour in Yokohama, Chan-gero Sonic, tour in Fukuoka). He sounded a little bit tired at the beginning in Fukuoka but he tried his best and still sounded wonderful till the end of the live. So I bought a CD to high touch and tell him how well he has done. I also asked him not to try too hard. And all the time he just gently smiled back and said Thank you. The fragrance left from his hands still linger on mine even after I left ;;

Another interesting event did happen to me and my friends in the final. After the live I went for dinner with a few Pikoots and on our way to the station, we were supposed to pass by the livehouse again. A taxi was running from behind us so we decided to stop and walked to the side to let it pass. Then that taxi stopped in front of the livehouse and turned out it was Piko’s taxi. So we saw him getting in the taxi so we waved at him and said good job. Of course we all freaked out after that, like not believing what just happened. It was a miracle, really xD

So that’s the end of my tour dream. I tried to keep this report short but you can see how long it has become. I feel like its still not half enough to write down everything I want to write but I hope it helps you understand how wonderful a live it was. There were a lot of cameramen during the final so I am secretly hoping there will be a DVD!

#piko #live tour #live report #pathfinder

23 notes · View notes

5darkhorse9 · 4 years

Text

Meteora

It’s been extremely hard these past weeks since the last time, extremely emotionally challenging, I am always in my head, spinning the same thoughts over and over and wishing I did things differently and said things differently. I really felt like I was going insane. Feeling so stuck because I can’t go back and undo anything, so sad, frustrated and filled with regret because in the end it was always MY CHOICE AND NOBODY ELSE’S to continue in a situation that was bad for me.

I didn’t keep hooking up with you because it physically felt amazing or I could orgasm hard or anything of that sort. I did because it was you and I was really into you and found it difficult to let go. Because I genuinely enjoyed spending time with you and I found temporary comfort and happiness in that intimacy with you. If we're looking at straight facts, I know you finished each time obviously, but other than the first time we ever hooked up when you took me to your house, you never made me cum, so it really wasn’t about that and I never put any thought into it, just felt nice to be with you like that and have that connection. I didn’t question it because I really liked you. It hit me that at the end of the day, you didn’t really ever deeply get to know me and my body like that and what feels good/what doesn’t. Then the sex happened and we already discussed the first time crap; moving on, the second time we had sex, I know you REALLY tried and I felt better and more connected. The third time was good, I thought I was finally getting to a more comfortable level with you, but I got REALLY drunk emotional after, and the reality of the situation started seeping in. And we had a convo about how empty and sad I feel when you leave and I explained to you the whole addiction analogy I had to you and chasing the highs and then withdrawing, cuz thats exactly what was happening. I was chasing temporary highs because I was so lost and this seemed like the only good thing in my life, but withdrawal hit me so hard each time. Then the last time you came over, reality slapped like a motherfucker and whether I wanted it to or not, my body knew this wasn't right. It wasn’t exactly the best time if I'm being honest, halfway through I wasn’t really into it, but you came over for a reason obv and I wasn't gonna ruin it for you. I’ve been analyzing everything over and over and looking back, I was SO BLIND all this time, and have been lying to myself so much that it’s beyond disturbing.

In my gut I always knew this whole situation was wrong, but always ignored it, threw everything in the back burner because I had that attachment to you. I got into suppression mode a while ago, and kept lying to myself over and over and chasing temporary highs with you. I bounced back every time that I felt like you hurt me and carried on. I stayed in this toxic situation and participated in the cycle over and over, because of multiple reasons. I didn’t love myself enough to be able to step away from being a side hoe type thing, to walk away simply because I deserve better. Let me start off saying this isn’t intended to be an attack towards you, I'm really mostly dealing with myself and how much I FUCKED up my morals and have lost myself completely while pointing out some truths to you. SO I'm just gonna try to be honest throughout this post.

As much as the first time hurt, I got over it, we talked about that and you were more careful and whatnot the second time, trying different positions over and over, paying attention to my body, which is why that was my favorite time, but after that it was always just....rough. And I get it, from your perspective you thought I was into the whole rough thing, you aren't really with virgins ever, and I was able to always take it without saying anything despite the fact that I literally was not experienced. I let you do your thing and fuck me your way. I’ve always let you be in charge. Thing is, it never stopped hurting. It hurt all the times we had sex, sometimes still a lot, not to the extent of first time, but still hurt. But like being kinda kinky, I would find a weird “pleasure” in the pain, I found it hot, the whole you dominating me thing. Being fucked into oblivion and all that, with the exception of the last time, I enjoyed being in that moment with you, that’s what was hot. Despite having no experience, only having sex a limited amount of times, and having them SO spaced out, I still always let you go full force as much as it hurt and just took it.

As much as I liked spending time with you, I realized I was never actually able to FULLY relax around you, my body was always tense in some form and I would feel myself tightening up as you would enter me, which I'm sure felt good for you, but it hurt for me. The pain would get better as we got into it but it also contributed to me never having an orgasm. The last time the pain never really got better throughout it, and when I asked you if I could get on top you wouldn't let it happen, that just turned me off and made it hurt even more. I told you “I need a break from your big dick” not to boost your ego, but I didn’t want to ruin the moment and be like “can you stop fucking me it hurts”.... I guess it turned me off that you kept fucking me your way and it took you a while to finally switch, just wasn't into it and then back to that position that you enjoy...at that point I just let you finish, not the best time for me. But what you said after killed it completely.

We’re sitting there after, and you’re all pleased, I'm just sitting there feeling sore and whatever and we talked about why I couldn’t finish..and you said “well its not me, I don’t have this problem”... basically saying it’s my fault? Not cool honestly, you don’t say that shit to a girl who has always given you and only you her body unconditionally despite the fact that she knew you didn't love her and didn't want to be with her and has done nothing but made you feel good. That coupled with you saying “well jaime cums like twice before I did” and “you're hard to please” literally NOTHING that I want to EVER hear combined with the fact that it never really felt good for me. All that REALLY fucked me up mentally, and the best part was when you leave me alone and I'm sitting on the toilet in pain and crying after making me feel like there was something wrong with me and feeling used...it was one of the worst moments I ever experienced. I started feeling shitty about my body again, like there was something wrong with me sexually but really like it’s the situation with you that was the problem. I can literally cum in minutes just being tuned on and not even looking at porn when I'm alone lol so my body is NOT the problem here. It’s everything about the situation not being right.

The aftermath has always been hard, each time my back and stomach and vagina hurts for days after, I still bled after each time and always felt nauseous after for days. My vagina gets so inflamed that it hurts to pee until the next day each time. I should've never had to go through any of that, it’s not normal, but it’s just mostly result of trauma combined with my body NOT being comfortable enough to let go like that and knowing this is a wrong situation. My body was literally screaming at me to stop doing this and I never listened...I was so lost

Honestly, I didn't know better, I didn’t have experience and obviously liking you and the intimacy I could have with you, I was blind and normalized all this, when in fact it wasn’t normal...at all. I would think “maybe this is just how sex is” (it shouldn't be) and I would get through it and want to have that experience and connection with you again because it just felt good to be in that moment, but the sex itself never felt good for me, it was really just about getting to do it with you that’s what was hot. After coming to my senses and looking back, I realized I really just was subconsciously after intimacy and feeling wanted rather than that rough sex, I was just seeking it in the wrong place...

It sucks hearing about how sex feels great and all that but I'm just stuck in “it just hurts - what’s the point of it?” it’s shitty when I hear friends talk about how good it can be, and I just get sad when I think about it... (similar to after first time). It’s one of the shittiest feelings, because I'm a REALLY sexual and horny person, if you had ever gotten me to be comfortable enough around you over time, I'd be a FREAK lol (but we were never together like that and I would just hold back cuz I didn't feel like I could let go at all)

For me to just sit there and keep associating sex with pain/discomfort is just really fucking sad and I know it shouldn't be that way and that makes me shut down, same exact feelings I had after first time. If this situation involved you not having a girlfriend and sneaking and me being able to not feel as wrong and actually be totally comfortable with you, it’d be different. I would feel like I could talk to you about it more and go more slowly at it until I got to that point where it could be rough and all that. But everything about the situation was wrong in every sense and again, you weren't there to just “take things slow” you were trying to fuck lol and I just...let it happen, regrettably. Again, MY CHOICE. That’s the worst part. Also me and you have completely different views of sex and what it means and I always looked past that and tried to go against my instincts because again, my attachment to you.

I think if you build that comfort and care with someone the kinky/rough whatever sex.. it could be amazing...but this situation wasn’t right for me from the gecko. It lacked that true emotional connection I needed and deserved because DUH YOU HAVE A FUCKING GF LOL. My lack of experience and being so tight, shouldn't have always just jumped into it...NOT what my body needed. Mentally I thought it’s all “hot” and allowed it for the reasons I mentioned, but deep down I just wanted something passionate and kept lying to myself without even thinking about it. In reality, what I needed as a virgin was a few first times of slower, gentle sex until I was READY for the more intense and I wouldn’t have gone through all the horrible shit I went through. But again, I went to the wrong source; that kind of sex would come from a loving boyfriend who cared about me, versus you were in it for a side hookup and NOT responsible for any of that. I know you weren't coming over for some “loving sex” lol... we not like that and like you said before if you wanted that you had ur gf so I never thought to speak up about what I really wanted and just continued... I’m highly disturbed at how I accepted so much less than I deserved because I lacked self love and confidence and I didn’t think I deserved better...I would shut myself down, lie to myself and let you do your way because whatever it was hot in my la la land fucked up fantasy world.

If I had waited for someone that was actually into me and dedicated to me, and I was comfortable and let them explore my body in every way until they fully learned my kinks and the COMMUNICATION was there, I know I could be having amazing sex after a few times, but it was MY choice to continue in this situation and not speak up and it RUINED sex for me and its a choice I will always have to live with as I heal.

Think about it, all I know about sex now is that it hurts, there’s no comfort after and I'm always left alone. I regret these choices I made but I can’t escape my own thoughts and have to live with it and just grow from the experience. It’s a dead end even if I kept being in this situation with you because it’s like drinking a slow poison. I just have to focus on me and heal from all this and just have to wait for the right guy to come along that loves me genuinely and makes me feel at ease, I think that’s when I will really enjoy sex and see my full potential. It’s a sad and lonely road but that’s how its gonna have to be which really sucks.

I just needed to spill everything because I am constantly haunted by all these thoughts and trapped in my head and I just can’t do it anymore. I’m saying all this not so you feel bad but so that you know some more background as I don’t usually speak up and obviously you can’t read minds lol so you should know what’s up, and also so that in the future if you think about asking to fuck again that you just don’t, I don’t want you to tell me like before “you’re rejecting me”.. cuz I’m not. I just know if I do this again with you, its just going to feel wrong (for all the reasons I mentioned, including the BIG ONE - being a side piece to someone with a gf).. i’m not going to be comfortable and it’s going to further damage me and delay the healing process. I can't keep sabotaging myself like this...For once I have to do the right thing and I cant keep putting myself in this toxic cycle and situation when it doesn’t benefit me in any way and in fact has destroyed me in the long run. I have to take care of myself and focus on myself and be a better person really, I can eat well and go to the gym every day but what I really have to work on is loving myself and my self worth and KNOW how I deserve such good things and hopefully one day, I will find happiness.

At the end of the day, you're literally the first person I ever gave myself away to like that and as much as I wish it didn’t happen, and I have been upset with you a lot before, really, I am not mad at you or anything because it was always my own choice to partake in a situation I knew was wrong. But life goes on and we get stronger. So I always have and will care about you as a person despite everything I went through and like we said before, we’re still homies/have each other’s back at work type thing, but I hope you can understand where I'm coming from and how I have to finally be better to myself and love that amazing soul that I have (even if you may not see it, I know other people do and the right guy one day will once I let myself be loved by the right person).

As much as I’ve been lying to myself, I need to feel loved and cared for to really let go/enjoy sex like that, otherwise its gonna keep feeling wrong

Like when you asked if I liked cuddling ..that’s all I want with someone is that closeness but I’m always afraid w you cuz we’re not together like that so I’ve always had to be in the mindset to “detach” and that’s always gone against my emotional nature

And when you said “it doesn’t bother you that I have a gf” no… it always bothered me but I was always too attached and threw that in the back burner and hid most vulnerable feelings from u

Like you said last time “I deserve having someone there for me after the sex for the lovey dovey crap”

If we both single, might be different I wouldn’t feel wrong about the situation and unworthy/ would be at ease with you and cum, but it has always felt wrong with you having a gf

I can’t do the emotional roller coasters anymore, was finding myself missing someone who I’m always a second option to, nah dude, it’s so toxic in long run

I enjoy spending time w/you but then you leave and I always felt more alone and empty than ever

Just need to do the right thing even when its hard; you stick to only fucking jamie like she deserves and I just continue on my own and learn to love myself/heal until I meet the right guy one day who is all about me and makes me feel loved

I want a relationship along with that intimacy and to be able to do other things with them, and that was something I could never get from you so can’t keep torturing myself and delaying healing process

I know this doesn’t change much for you, you fall back into comfort of ur relationship

For me I been trying to just start taking care of myself and feeling low, eating better going to gym and crying until the pain resolves one day

Otherwise nothing changes for me in our dynamic, exactly like we talked about last time - we still homies. Obvs I care about you and think of you, and u can come to me about anything/always here for you and all that.

1 note · View note

Last Seen Blogs

hangedalladalla

hangezoe

annualreports1

Annual Reports

anrequiptech

lunaneko14

The Werewolf Goddess!

moonauthentic