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crystal-methionine · 2 years

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It’s that time of year where I talk about this years Eurovision even though nobody’s asked me to or cares about it.

1. Armenia 🇦🇲 Rosa Linn - Snap: Before you all come for me, this song is the vibe I go for in a song. The staging was immaculate (even tho in the semi, she tore a post it off). Armenia was robbed for coming in 20th. I understand maybe why it wasn’t super high but like in my opinion, this was so so good. Glad Armenia is back. 100/10

2. Sweden 🇸🇪 Cornelia Jakobs - Hold Me Closer: Oh Sweden, how you almost send Anders Bagge instead of this is entirely a bunch of bullshit. It’s classy, a bit rocky, it’s so singable, and the bitch looked stunning. Staging was simple but flawless as Sweden usually does it. Definitely a Sweden fanboy this year. 95/10

3. Czechia 🇨🇿 We Are Domi - Lights Off: How in the hell did this get so low on the night of the final when it did so well in Semi 2??? It’s baffling to me because we’ve seen openers do well before (Belgium 2016). Czechia take notes bc this kind of song and staging was the best combo you’ve put out in a while. Deserved better for sure and I always belt with the “Where are you noooow”. 90/10

4. Iceland 🇮🇸 Systur - Með Hækkandi Sól: Come for me all you want for having Iceland this high. I don’t care. I want to see more from the Indigo Girls/ABBA crossover that these three make up. The song is so calming and beautiful. Brownie points for Icelandic, which I love to hear in a song. If I could, I would’ve given them all my 12 points just to see them do slightly better than 3rd to last. I get not everyone likes it, but y’all really got to let it go with the folky ballad hate. 90/10

5. Portugal 🇵🇹 MARO - saudade, saudade: THE song this year that makes me cry and just takes me away on a journey. The live for this had me living for it. I turned off all my lights, sat there, looked at my bf who couldn’t have cared left, and took my phone flashlight out, and swayed the entire time. Best Portuguese entry since Conan. Super happy it came in Top 10. 89/10

6. Ukraine 🇺🇦 KALUSH - Stefania: “Politics” aside, I was super happy to see them a) be able to represent Ukraine, b) glad they were so well received, and c) definitely a deserving winner in my opinion. I understand how some people might not like it, but bruh I was bouncing around trying my best to get the rap bits in whatever Ukrainian I could even remember from listening to it over and over since I had first heard it. Yeah they probably were helped bc of everything going on, but I don’t mind they won at all. 85/10

7. Greece 🇬🇷 Amanda Tjenford - Die Together: If I’m being entirely honest, this song was immediately one I kind of felt was overhyped. Overtime, it grew a lot on me. I knew it was going to place top 10 from the start, but at least I started to enjoy it more. The staging really did help it for me. While the broken chairs were a choice that were frankly confusing, Amanda sang and ate. 80/10

8. Norway 🇳🇴 Subwoolfer - Give That Wolf A Banana: Silly entries with a good beat seem to be my guilty pleasure because I always loved this song most from this year’s options for Norway. Glad it was chosen so it wasn’t super serious this year. Plus choreo even I could learn. Glad it placed top 10. Welcome back to the top Norway. I missed you last year. 75/10

9. Spain 🇪🇸 Chanel - Slo Mo: Aside from the Benidorm drama conflama, this was a smart choice in the end. Sexy choreo with a goddess always does well no matter who you are in Eurovision (other countries take note). I mean that dance break was having me yelling “You better mother****in WERK Bih!!” God it was so good. I preferred other songs, but Spain definitely found a formula that is gonna work in their favor. 75/10

10. Netherlands 🇳🇱 S10- De Diepte: My winner for the longest time. Thought we’d be going back to Holland next year, but the other songs commanded stage a bit more live. I don’t know any Dutch but this song is definitely helping me learn some more and how to pronounce words (this is why I like native tongue songs). S10 did so well and I think 11th is fine, but should have been in top 10. 74/10

11. Ireland 🇮🇪 Brooke - That’s Rich: Y’all who can vote suck. Ireland actually did something right for once and you guys did nothing to reward them. Sure That’s Rich didn’t have the same gags to it that maybe some other Semi 2 songs did, but y’all did my girl dirty. Bloodbaths be hard and Ireland always lands in them unfortunately it seems. 70/10

12. Romania 🇷🇴 WRS - Llamame: Bébé got me dancing. Welcome back Romania. This is how to do it. Again bonus on the choreo and the male male flamenco moment had me going even if it was just for a second. Wasn’t too high on my radar until the live performances. WRS killed it. 65/10

13. UK 🇬🇧 Sam Ryder - Space Man: UK him? You actually didn’t fuck up this year. I mean Molly and Lucie were fantastic as well, but the staging this year was top notch. I still prefer other songs but I guess a top 10 finish was deserved. 60/10

14. Cyprus 🇨🇾 Andromache - Eλα: Aphrodite called and said yes bitch. I personally think Cyprus was just victim to a tough semi. But JURY votes at 9???!!! 9????!!!!! Robbery of the biggest stint of this year in my opinion. Was it sang the best? Not 100% but still around 80%. The staging was also cool and very Birth of Venus clamshell realness. Bonus points for Greek. Studio was definitely better by a bit but should have qualified. 55/10

15. France 🇫🇷 alvan & ahez - Fulenn: A grower for me for sure. It’s hard to follow Barbara Pravi. Having Breton was super cool and the stage was not as hot a mess as it was in the French final. Did it deserve second last? No. Did it deserve top 10? No. I thoroughly enjoy the song and sing along when it comes on. 60/10

16. Italy 🇮🇹 Mahmood & Blanco - Brividi: Love the song and was a winner with just studio version for a while (til S10). The live was a bit of a let down especially when we can see what Mahmood is capable of (2019). Maybe a bit too much wine? Maybe they lost some of the sexual tension they seemed to have during San Remo? Either way, I still listen to the studio and sing along while belting Mahmoods part in the chorus. 55/10

17. Serbia 🇷🇸 Konstrakta - In Corpore Sano: I don’t like the song or listen to it. But I was still doing the hand thing and singing the chorus while watching. I begrudgingly put it here bc I have to accept defeat. Yell at me all you want for not top 10 but I wash my hands of your filthy negativity. 50/10

18. Albania 🇦🇱 Ronela Hajati - Sekret: Look, this song is fun and crazy. I get to whip my hair around and twerk in parts. Was it a bit of a mess sonically and I can see where it didn’t really get viewed as a qualifier? Yeah a bit. But I still wanted it. Why can’t the final be 30 songs? Rip to the Albania streak. Please don’t be discouraged from sending bops like this. 50/10

19. San Marino 🇸🇲 Achille Lauro - Stripper: At first, I wasn’t a big fan and tbh I’m still not sold per se. But that performance was everything chaotic and queer I needed in my life. I mean a bedazzled buckin bronco on stage and y’all said no?????? Shame we only got to see it once. Keep rockin San Marino. 45/10

20. Lithuania 🇱🇹 Monica Liu - Sentamentai: I HATED this song at first. Maybe a bit of hurt in that Ieva was back with an absolute masterpiece and got close to last in the final of the Lithuanian selection. But the spooky disco groove overtook me in the end. Still not my fave but glad she made it to the final and didn’t do necessarily too bad. 40/10

21. Australia 🇦🇺 Sheldon Riley - Not the Same: Wow what a voice. The costuming was impeccable. The song was I think the only thing a bit lacking for me though. Still love it and can relate a lot but alas, other songs exist and did better. 40/10

22. Austria 🇦🇹 LUMIX & Pia Maria - Halo: I wish I could put this higher bc I jam all the way out with the studio. The live detracted for sure. She improved on vocals pretty well, but in the end I guess it didn’t improve enough. Staging was also a bit blah. Oh well. Still got the studio tho. 35/10

23. Denmark 🇩🇰 Reddi - The Show: I do listen to this one when it comes on the playlist. Something nostalgic about it. Reminds me of What’s New Scooby Do? for some reason. That early/mid 2000 punk girl pop vibe. The indulgent holding of the notes in the beginning were my only negative for the live. 15/10

24. Azerbaijan 🇦🇿 Nadir Rustamli - Fade to Black: I’m losing juice writing these reviews tbh. That’s how I feel about the rest of these songs in this year’s Eurovision. The rest are fine for the most part but no longer get above 10s. This song was carried by juries and I understand why. It’s not bad. It’s also Azerbaijan so it’s quality staging and singing. Qualifier? Sure. Did I want others ahead of it in semi 2? Absolutely. 9.5/10

25. Estonia 🇪🇪 Stefan - Hope: A bit of a western vibe is cool (Iceland did it better) but saying hope over and over just isn’t original enough for me. 9/10.

26. Belgium 🇧🇪 Jérémie Makiese - Miss You: The song is good but not great. Live was alright. Qualifier? Borderline and I’m fine that it did. Others were better. 8.75/10

27. North Macedonia 🇲🇰 Andrea - Circles: So so close to the right track. Song is fine. Staging was actually not half bad. Flag drama seemed a bit excessive but what can you do? I wouldn’t recommend withdrawing bc if this is the route North Macedonia is going, they’ll qualify next year. 8.5/10

28. Poland 🇵🇱 Ochman - River: Gripe about me but something about this song got tiring for me. I normally skip it. Idk why. Does he sing well? Hell yes. He sings so well. I just grew tired of the song rather quick. Deserve to qualify? Absolutely. Just not high on my rank. 8.25/10

29. Finland 🇫🇮 The Rasmus - Jezebel: Again gripe about me. I don’t care. It’s a good rock song. UMK this year had so many better options. This one just got old quick like Poland for me. 8.25/10

30. Croatia 🇭🇷 Mia Dimsič - Guilty Pleasure: The lesser of the folky girl songs. Definitely gave me Taylor Swift vibes. On the live performance, the Croatian bumped my interest but it’s pretty much just that and nothing else that makes me perk up. It was performed well though. 7.75/10

31. Malta 🇲🇹 Emma Muscat - I Am What I Am: This song suffers from basicness. Cliché Eurovision songs are fine to me, but this one didn’t even make it to the level of cliché where it’s good enough to overlook it. Instead,it’s so basic that it gets overlooked entirely. 7/10

32. Switzerland 🇨🇭 Marius Bear - Boys Do Cry: That we do. Especially after losing the streak of amazing songs coming from Switzerland. The song is a twinge off for me. A bit too boring. Didn’t really deserve the final but whatever. 6/10

33. Latvia 🇱🇻 Citi Zēni - Eat Your Salad: As a scientist, I approve of environmental messages. But this song I am not a fan of. It’s not about 😺 that gets me a bit turned off. It’s just too much in a not great way for me. Idk why. 5/10

34. Germany 🇩🇪 Malik Harris - Rockstars: Boring. End of story. But still better than some. Germany you can do better. 3/10

35. Moldova 🇲🇩 Zdob si Zdub - Trenuletul: Did they turn the party live? Yes. Did I still like the song? No. 3/10

36. Slovenia 🇸🇮 LPS - Disko: This song takes 5ever to start and doesn’t seem to go much of anywhere. I tried to give it a chance bc I love disco but alas. 2/10

37. Georgia 🇬🇪 Circus Mircus - Lock Me In: I’ll give them creativity and character. Costuming? Sure. Song? Too many components shoved into one. 2/10

38. Bulgaria 🇧🇬 Intelligent Music Project - Intention: Dads who rock in the garage should probably stay there. Nothing super bad, just wasn’t interesting for me. 1.5/10

39. Montenegro 🇲🇪 Vladana - Breathe: was she stunning? Yes. Was the song any good? Meh. I also didn’t like the vocals? Seemed out of breathe at times???? 1/10

40. Israel 🇮🇱 Michael Ben David - I.M.: I M over it. Officially. I found this super grating and annoying for some reason. Revamp was better than the original but still hated it. 0/10

#eurovision #me #my opinion #eurovision 2022 #roast my opinions if you want idc

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shoutoismybaby · 4 years

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Omega Shame Part 2

Part 1 / Part 3

Thank you guys for all your interest! It made me super happy to see so many people excited about my writing, so I hope you enjoy and stay tuned for the last part soon!

Warnings: Angst, depression, mentions of fighting (bc hero training)

***

The classroom didn't smell right. Not only was your serotonin inducing scent the class had gotten accustomed to in the past couple months missing, but a certain caramel smell had a hint of burnt rubber and ash to it. Despite some of the girls hearing commotion coming from your room, you didn’t answer their calls or knocks, so no one knew what was going on. The only knowledge the class had was that you weren’t in class and Bakugou was upset. Well, more upset than he usually was.

Even his best friends, whether or not he would admit that’s what they were to him, would earn growls and bared teeth if they got too close. Other than that though, Bakugou was generally unresponsive. Only caring when people got too close, but he didn’t respond when Aizawa called on him, or when the lunch bell rang. Only shoving the teachers hand off his shoulder when he came to check up on the blond.

Bakugou was just too caught up in his thoughts to really be aware of his surroundings as he followed his class aimlessly to the cafeteria.

Even though his body was in the P.E Training grounds, his brain was back in time to your dorm room. Back when your body began to tremble at the sight of him, the way salty tears rushed from your eyes when he started to speak. Your throat squeaking as you begged him to spare the nest you had constructed. It was beautifully made, if you had asked him. The way your soft blankets were woven together with your favorite weekend clothes, pillows being used to stable the walls. It looked incredibly comfortable.

Bakugou knew that Omegas could get upset if their nest was intruded without permission. But he also knew he was nowhere near your circular haven. Yet, you were crying, shaking, and begging.

It was then that it dawned on the hothead that you were scared of him. His omega was Terrified of him. It made his heart beat erratically, how could he make someone he cared about so scared of him? Especially his own omega. It was his job to keep you safe, to take care of you and make sure you were comfortable. You trusted him to fulfill this role, but you thought he was going to destroy your nest?

It made Bakugous’ buzz in confusion. It made no sense that you would be freaking out just because your alpha walked in your room.

Unless you weren't even his omega by choice. What if you just accepted his courting gift because you were afraid he would hurt you? He had been told multiple times throughout his life that he needed to stop being so aggressive, that he would scare omegas away, but he had always brushed those comments off. He had thought that he would find someone who liked him despite his anger, and he thought you were that person.

Clearly, though, you were too fearful of him to even reject his proposal. Your trembling body inside of your nest was undeniable proof of that. You were too scared to even tell him you were nesting, and if the sight was evidence enough you didn’t seem to have or want his scent anywhere close to your nest. He should have noticed it before. What kind of alpha scared those they were supposed to protect?

You probably just got off of your meds to make him happy too. You had made so many sacrifices to keep him happy, and the thought of that made his blood boil. He had been a terrible alpha to you. He had to end this, he couldn’t put you through anymore pain. His inner alpha cried at the thought of having hurt you.

His large hand moved towards his opposite wrist, gently shimmying the bracelet that sat on it off. It was your courting gift to him, since you insisted on making him something in return. It was simple, made of skillfully twisted threads in his hero costume colors. His heart had skipped a beat the moment you presented it to him, not that he would tell anyone that. Especially not now, not when all the memories he shared with you were put into perspective.

He remembered how it felt as though the threads burnt his skin on its way past. How it dragged his heart down with it as it fell to the floor. Since then, he felt numb to the outside world. It didn’t matter how many times Kirishima tried to get him involved in their 1-1 match, he mostly just stood there, letting his instincts do the bare minimum to protect his body.

“Come on man!” His body dodged another hit just enough before slacking again, causing the redheaded alpha to growl. “You’re not responding to anything and you smell, honestly bad bro. What’s going on with you!?”

The only thing “going on” in Katsuki’s brain was replaying the pain in your eyes over and over. Replaying how you were scared, no, terrified of the person who was supposed to protect you. His omega wasn’t his omega anymore, and his alpha felt broken. He felt alone.

He could only focus on how he failed to do his basic duties. How he failed you. Everyone had been right when they critiqued his anger. He was too aggressive to deserve an Omega. Clearly he couldn’t treat one right no matter how much their smile made serotonin speed through his brain. If he couldn’t protect you from himself it was ridiculous to think he would do anything but fuck up protecting Japan from villains. He was a terrible alpha who couldn’t even treat an Omega properly, so what was the point? He wasn’t even good at his innate purpose.

By now Kirishima was getting desperate. All day his best friend had been growing more and more despondent, and he was scared for what that meant. He just needed Bakugou to talk to him, Kirishima wanted to be reassured that he was okay. And he had an idea of how to pull Bakugou back into the present, even if he didn’t like it.

“I don’t want to do this but, I’m really worried about you. Bakugou is this about (Y/n)?” The blondes alpha perked up at the mention of your name, drawing Bakugou’s head up with it.

“The girls said something happened in (Y/n)’s room last night and,” He hesitated, ruby eyes falling to Bakugou's large wrists. “You’re not wearing the courting bracelet she made for you anymore”

His words caused a whimper to leave Katsukis throat. Kirishima had no idea what kind of pain that reminder brought to Bakugou, but he could guess. The way the blonds hands clenched and brows furrowed made Kirishima's heart drop, he hated bringing up things that could hurt Katsuki. But he could only fix the problem if he knew what was wrong, and for that he needed Bakugou to talk to him.

“Did, did you guys break up?” Kirishima kept his distance, afraid of what Bakugou would do once he snapped out of his trance. But all Bakugou did was begin to shake, blinking furiously as he became aware of his surroundings once again along with the hot tears that flooded his eyes. Kirishima ran towards his friend then, placing a hand on the other alphas shoulder in a hope to be any bit comforting without overwhelming his friend. He analyzed the way Bakugous nose scrunched, causing his large canines to show as the first sob burst out of his trembling frame. It was so powerful that the blond lost his balance, falling into the stunned redheads arms. Face tucked into his friends chest, shielded from the attention his sobs were bringing from his entire class.

“Bakugou…” Kirishima ran his hands up and down Bakugous back gently feeling the way the blond fisted his shirt in desperation, “What happened? You can tell me.”

“I’m a terrible alpha,” Bakugous voice was shaky and Kirishima almost felt guilty at how relieved he was to hear it. “No you’re not man, wha-” “Yes I am!” Bakugous voice reached the same volume as his sobs that interrupted his speech. “She thought that I was going to destroy her nest, she was scared of me. I was supposed to defend her when really I’m the one she wanted protection from.”

Krishima didn’t know how to respond to what his friend said. Eyes too wide in confusion as he looked towards his teacher for answers. You had always been absolutely smitten with Bakugou, just his presence in the room made it seem like you radiated love and positivity. It didn’t seem that Bakugou needed any further encouragement to continue though, as his next statement sent ice down the spines of the whole class.

“I failed as an alpha… I don’t want to be alive anymore.” All Bakugou wanted to do in that moment was curl up and die. He didn’t have a purpose anymore, so he didn’t see the point of existing. It was then that his body seemed to shut back down in order to conserve energy, he began to slack in Kirishima's arms leaving him sitting on the ground despite the redheads' many protests. The revelation of how his best friend felt bringing tears to his own eyes, and a recognition to his teachers.

“Aizawa, what's happening to Bakugou?” Kirishima asked, struggling to hold himself together as he knelt in front of his friend. Bakugou’s eyes seemed more void of life than ever as he stared aimlessly at Kirishima's shirt.

“Someone call Recovery Girl, I fear that Bakugou has developed an Alpha depression.”

***

Tag List:

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#bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha omegaverse #bakugou katsuki x reader #alpha bakugou x reader #bakugou x reader #mha omegaverse

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7fckingidiots · 3 years

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Would you be alright with writing some HCs about the brothers and a MC who's a trans guy? Sorry if it's a tall order or too vague, they're a big comfort for me and I'd like to see what ideas you have bcs your headcanons are fantastic ;w;

HELL YEAH DUDE!!!! IM ALSO TRANS!!! AH!!!!! demigirl rights :3 but i also find a huge comfort in the boys and i hc all of them as trans because no one can Stop Me •• but i really hope you enjoy these and remember you’re valid and i care u so much! Also i hope you don’t mind but i kinda made it gender neutral so every trans folk could enjoy!

The Brothers With A Trans MC

Lucifer

He didn’t know until you came out to him honestly. He knew all his other siblings were trans but with all the work Diavolo gave him and adding new students from different realms on top of that he hadn’t really had time to notice any minor changes in you.

He feels guilty about this and immediately makes sure(like everyone else)to ask for your pronouns, name, and how you would like to present yourself from now on.

Fixes your ID cards and your papers with Diavolo right after dinner

God. He’s such a dad and he gets you things that have your new name on them. You wake up to see you have a new pencil case with your name embroidered on it with matching pencils. God.....he’s so weird i love him so much

Asmo does most of your clothing shopping but for formal wear he takes you shopping! He’s not about to buy you some cheap tux or gown ok it’s gonna be over 2000 grim and he’s gonna get you three of them STOP HIM

He’s not the best with verbal affection so he writes down notes that are like “you looked very handsome/pretty today.” or when he first starts writing them they’re like “you’re a boy/girl/kid. i’m proud of you.” Thank u mr morningstar

You want surgery or to start hormones??? He will stop all his work with Diavolo and spend forever looking up things for you, he wants you to be as safe as possible(pls he almost fainted after he realized you’d have to give yourself a shot like everyday dhdhdhjdhd hc that demons/angels don’t have to do hormone therapy i’m so JEALOUS)

Practices saying your pronouns in his study when you first come out. He just wants to make sure you feel as safe as possible in his care(and he remembers how terrible it felt to be misgendered)

Guess what....he loves you no matter what :)

Mammon

You’re blind as hell if you couldn’t see his top scars but I respect it

King DOES slip up on your pronoun change but always immediately corrects himself. Satan has a spray bottle that he sprays Mammon with when he does it. Mammon is NOT amused but the same can’t be said for Belphie.

Gender affirming activities??? Oh yeah like robbing a bank?? That’s pretty gender neutral and trans right?? Yeah!!! Wow such a good supportive brother.

If you want you can wear the formal wear Lucifer bought you to the said bank heist. Boom trans rights

You can practice painting his nails or doing his makeup if you’re too nervous to do it on yourself first!! Dw if it’s bad he also can’t do makeup or paint nails so once you let him return the favor you’re both laughing and Asmo is distraught.

KING at dying hair he will get you whatever you need and if you want an entire different hair cut entirely he’s ON it

Very used to being Loud and Brash but if you need someone to talk to about anything really he always calms down and sits down to listen to whatever you have to say.

Lots of gendered gifts from him. This said for men??? Oh ok adds to cart. Oh pink??? For ladies??? yeah that can go in there too

You’re never gonna believe this.....But he loves you and supports you :)

Levi

He was the first one to come out to you at the house!! He was just so excited! Same hat!!!

Gets literally any video game where you can design the protag/have custom pronouns and will play games like that with you for hours

Would you like a pride flag.....for u.....He has too many.....Please take the trans flag please he has no room....he bought in bulk for a pride event and didn’t consider the consequences of his actions

Miku binder but irl. He will get if for you but unironically.....thanks King. He just likes binders with patterns and i respect IT

Dysphoria?? He gives you his hoodie bc that was his trademark dysphoria hoodie and i GUESS for you he can share............he would give u anything just ask nicely he’s sensitive

Reads any character that matches up with your gender and is like!!!!! That’s you!!!! OMG!!!! You in da IRL

Goes back and edits his tweets if they use your old name or pronouns(also has he/they in his bio. this is for nothing just makes me :D)

If you haven’t chosen your name he’s gonna suggest so many fictional characters. POV levi kin assigns you.

You listen to music together that just has Trans Vibes.....maybe u cry together but there’s no judgment!! It’s just nice :)

God it’s wild but! He loves u and thinks ur great :)

Satan

Enby Satan. That’s all :)

He’s very quite about it, he supports you! He’s just not loud like his brothers

He brings you book about gender studies and LGBTQ history that he thinks would interest you(there some of his favorite books and they’ve made him feel the most comfortable in his gender)

Gives you a name list if you haven’t named yourself yet! He cares about you and wants to make sure you have the right name that suits you

He’s the one that tells you that it’s ok if you’re still figuring it all out, learning about yourself is a very tricky process and if anyone knows that it’s Satan

Any of the brothers would kill anyone who misgendered you but with Satan that shit is ON SIGHT

Asks you how you know and what were the signs that gave it away to you, but only if you’re comfortable telling him!! He just finds everyone’s experience interesting and would like to know yours as well.

Spells for fucking DAYS Satan personally kills body dysphoria the best he can(mainly bc he’s HIGHKEY afraid of you getting surgery he hates knives so much)

Makes your comfort food for you when you’re feeling down about yourself and will read whatever you want to hear outloud to you.

!!!!!! GET THIS !!!!!! He loves YOU :0

Asmo

Fucking excited!!!! This means you two are going to buy so much clothing together and he gets to style you let’s GO

Buys you whatever you want but he will make you try it all on so be CAREFUL what u wish for.....ur gonna be there till the store closes yeah......

Paints your nails with the trans pride flag!! Also does your makeup and gives you tips on how to look more masculine or fem!!

VOICE LESSONS

He will help you lower or raise the pitch of your voice if it KILLS him. It eventually becomes like a mini class after school

Helps with internalized transphobia! Hes dealt with his fair share and knows how awful it can be and he will NOT being having you experience that as well we r practicing Self Care now

Picks apart any one who misgenders you until they’re crying he has NO fucking time for that behavior in this HOUSE

Sometimes self care is eating whatever you want and sitting in the dysphoria hoodies while watching chick flicks with Asmo

He likes dressing you up but he’s always sure to set boundaries so he never puts you into something that makes you feel uncomfortable

ALSO edits his posts and takes down anything that makes you uncomfortable!!

He loves you so much!!!!

Beel

another one to hand you The Dysphoria Hoodie and it’s very large and comfy!

he’ll help you make out a work out routine that will help you get the body you want and it makes him really happy to work out with you :)

he’s gonna hold your hand if you have to take shots and will give you puppy eyes if you don’t let him. He’s just worried!!!! He wants to help

stands behind you whenever you’re nervous about coming out to someone, he will NOT have someone making you feel bad or misgendering you

he’ll see food with trans pride colors and gives it too you, probably doesn’t even know what it is half the time but it made him think of you so he makes sure to get it for you

he doesn’t trip up on any of your new pronouns or name and makes it seem like he never even knew them. dead name???? what’s that??? a type of sauce?????

will let you vent to him whenever needed and will always make you a sundae after you’ve finished. it’s comically huge but it’s tasty and does make you feel a lot better, thanks beel

makes sure you remember to take off your binder if you’ve been wearing it for more than eight hours! and if you’ve been wearing heels to feel more fem he reminds you to take those off too and has a pair of slippers for you in his room that you can wear instead

hey! get this! He loves you so, so much :D

Belphie

you’re trans? ok kid join the club. he doesn’t make a big deal at all

are you still gonna cuddle with him and join him in his quest to make lucifer’s life difficult? yeah? ok then cool what’s ur name

if he hears someone misgender you he waits till you’ve left the room and just kills whoever did it, dude’s unhinged what did you expect from him honestly

he’s actually really curious about any hormone therapy you’re on and likes listening to you rant about it to him. he likes seeing your face light up and it partly reminds him of lilith

calls your hormones something stupid like “oh dude, your gamer girl juice arrived.” or “hey your little man potion is here.” ...thanks belphie

will NOT let you sleep in a binder or push up bra!!! not healthy!! let ur chest breath guys

like mammon, he gets you gendered gifts but they’re so fucking weird? you didn’t need a girls version of a collectable hot wheels set???? he got you blue lightning mcqueen sheets?????? those EXIST here????!!!!! when does he even shop......

introduces you to new people like “this is our resident boy/girl/human. they don’t do much but i think they’re cool.”

he really does care about you but he remembers when he came out he just didnt want people to make a big deal about it so he’s just doing what would have made him feel the most comfortable, but you can still see how much love he has for you when you look into his eyes

he loves you, so, so much :)

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imasimpforshanks · 3 years

Note

Hello <3 Can I ask for Angst alphabet with Coby ?~ thanks a lot <3

Angst Alphabet - Coby

a/n: BRUHHHH HIS WAS SO HARD TO DO BC HES SUCH A SWEETIE 😭😭😭😭😭💗 regardless, I hope you like it! x

ALSO - please note reader is a civilian and not a marine (but coby is still a marine). It was just easier for me to write it this way !!

A- Accident (would they blame themselves if you died in an accident?)

Coby wouldn’t exactly blame himself, but he would feel really weak. It would be lots of comments about his own worth and capabilities such as: “I’m still too weak” or I’m never going to be strong enough”. (kind of similar to Zoro in that sense).

B-Break up (How would they break up with you?)

He would try to be as honest and as upfront as possible, but he gets really anxious and just starts stumbling over his words ending every sentence with “ya know?”. In the end, he just uses every cliché in the book because he can’t remember or seem to find the ability to say what he really wanted to.

C-Crying (how would they make you cry?)

This dude is far too much of a sweetheart to ever make you cry. If you were to cry because of him, it’d be because of how much time the two of you have to be away from each other. He hates having to leave you because it’s always a lot of tears on both sides.

D-Death (how would they react to your death?)

He would be devasted. Crying in front of anyone and everyone he doesn’t care. Coby would also become really unmotivated and go through a little bit of an existential crisis like “What’s the point of this anymore?” “what am I even doing?”. Eventually he’d remember how much you believed in him, and how much good he could really do in the world – so, he’d keep going. For you.

E-Emotion (what is one emotion they would try to hide the most and how would they do it?)

Honestly, Coby is someone who is extremely open and expressive. He doesn’t (or maybe it’s more accurate to say he can’t) hide his emotions. That’s just not who he is. He expresses openly whatever emotion it is he is feeling.

F-Fight (do you two ever fight? How big are the fights? What do you fight about? Etc.)

He genuinely tries to avoid fighting with you at all costs. Nothing between the two of you ever escalates that far because Coby manages to talk the two of you out of whatever tension has been built.

G-Guilt (what is the biggest thing they feel guilty about?)

It’s not necessarily guilt, but Coby still feels as though he owes Luffy his life. Because of Luffy, Coby was able to become a marine. It’s because of Luffy that Coby continues to work as hard as he does. Most of what has happened in Coby’s life is all thanks to Luffy and because of that, he feels as though he has a debt he can never repay (even though all of this happened because luffy was just being luffy).

H-Heartbreak (what would cause them pain in the relationship? How would they deal during a break-up?)

Having to be away from you for long periods of time (obviously because he’s a marine) is really painful for the both of you. It can but quite a bit of strain on your relationship as long distance isn’t easy.

During a break-up, his mind would be all over the show. At work, he wouldn’t be able to focus properly which would cause many problems for not only himself, but others around him too.

I-Injured (how would they react if you are badly injured?)

Panic mode: activated. All his focus is shifted to you. He forgets about everything around him and is set on trying to get you help. He doesn’t even try to take down whoever, or whatever, caused your injury. You are his one and only priority in that moment.

J-Jealousy (what do they do if they are jealous?)

The sweetheart would feel so nervous. He’d keep to himself and try to avoid you for a while because he can’t stop thinking about how much better off you would be with literally anyone else.

K-Kill (would they kill for revenge?)

Coby is definitely not the type to kill for revenge. He hates all the killing and death that happens in the world. He’s a person who is all about trying to stop the cycle of hatred. so despite the anger, pain and hurt he would be feeling he would put all of that emotion aside, and settle it a different way.

L-Loss (what is their greatest loss?)

During Marineford when marines (and pirates) were dying left and right, Coby was shocked. It was far too much unnecessary death. Witnessing all that death was an emotional overload, but it did lead to one of the most pivotal moments of his life.

M-Mistake (what is the worst mistake they ever made with you?)

Unfortunately, it was something entirely out of his control. But one time he had to leave for a mission with the Marines in the middle of the night. He couldn’t tell you anything about it or why he was leaving. He just had to up and leave.

N-Nightmares (how often do they have them? What are they about? How do they deal with it?)

Sometimes Coby has nightmares about Marineford. The constant voices and cries of agony form an endless loop in his sleep, gradually getting louder and louder until he screams himself awake. After waking up in a panic he manages to calm his breathing. Then, Coby gives himself a pep talk “that is why you’re working so hard. To become strong enough to be fleet admiral so nothing like that will ever happen again.”

O-Outrage (how and why would they get mad at you?)

As with the fights, I don’t think Coby really gets mad at you. Probably over something minor like you ate the last cookie or something. It’s not anger, he just gets pouty until you say you’ll make it up to him.

P-Past (what has happened in your relationship that changed the way you saw each other?)

Having to do your relationship long distance was a pivotal point for the both of you. For most, it can be a deal breaker and it comes with more negatives than positives. But, for the two of you, it was a wake-up call, and, it was the moment you both realized “I can’t live without you, we will make this work”.

Q-Quality (what is their most dangerous/toxic quality?)

I wouldn’t say this is dangerous or toxic idk (???) but ANWAYSSSSS. Coby lacks certainty in his own decisions. He’s not so bad now, but it used to be a lot worse. He second guesses himself too much, which can be the difference between life and death in a high pressure situation.

R-Rejection (how would they react to you rejecting their confession (or the other way around))

Being rejected by you would definitely impact his self-esteem. It’d bring up a lot of insecurities and feelings of inadequacy. (PLS DON’T REJECT THIS PRECIOUS BOY).

S-Scars (battle or self-inflicted)

Coby does have a scar on his head. It’s not entirely certain when or where he received this scar, but it’s likely to be from his rough training with Garp.

T-Trust (have they ever broken your trust?)

No, Coby has never broken your trust. In fact, your relationship is held up by the unwavering trust the two of you have in one another. It may seem funny to say that, because trust is a vital element of any relationship, but it’s particularly the case for you two. Being a marine means there’s going to be quite a few things he can’t tell you, but you know he can’t tell you and he really appreciates how much you understand that.

U-Urge (how badly do they want to see you after you guys separated?)

He’s had to learn to cope with not seeing you for long periods of time. But, despite all that practice it’s still unbelievably difficult. When he can, he’ll write you letters to keep you informed about his safety. He won’t ask, but he’d really appreciate if you wrote him back.

V-Vicious (what do they do when they lash out on you?)

I genuinely don’t believe he would lash out at you. He just wouldn’t. Maybe, he’s slammed a few doors, but other than that… (sorry I feel like this one is boring af ugh).

W-Weak (what makes them feel weak how do they try to avoid it?)

Coby always felt weak and incapable in his abilities. Sometimes those feelings resurface. But honestly, he trues to avoid this by remembering how and why he is where he is. He thinks of all the people who have helped him along the way (Luffy, Garp etc.) and it motivates him to push forward.

X-X-ray (what do they hate and show it most obviously?)

He hates needless violence. He understands in some situations violence is necessary, but, then there are some situations (like the end of marineford) where lives are being lost for no reason whatsoever.

Y-Yearn (what is one thing that they want but can’t have?)

He wants nothing more than to openly be BFF’s with Luffy. Given the two different worlds they live in, it’s just never going to happen, despite Luffy being a genuinely good person. (I KNOW THIS IS MEAN TO BE ANGSTY BUT I COULDN’T HELP IT LMFAO)

Z-Zero (what do they do/say in your dying moments?)

Oh boy. There would be endless amounts of tears. Through sniffles and snot, he’d be trying to thank you for everything you’ve done for him, all the love and support you’ve shown him.

#coby one piece #coby x reader #one piece #one piece x reader #one piece headcanons #one piece imagines #angst alphabet #one piece alphabet

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moonlit-imagines · 4 years

Text

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s Daughter (Continued)

Tony Stark x daughter!reader

warnings: drinking mention, is period mention a thing?

a/n: sorry if i broke anyones heart on my last hc, heres some things i forgot to add in my headcanons for all u avid dad!tony readers

prompt: this ones all over the place, just some random things to read while u recover xx, it’s not very long (which is good bc those long posts i wrote were making my app glitch), it’s not great, but its here

The Early Years (1) The Teenage Years (2) The Intense Years (3) The Aftermath (4)

y/n literally cannot stop doing peace signs, she saw her dad do it once when she was a kid and now she does it without even realizing

she was in the bathroom when tony got called “tony stank” and now everyone calls her “y/n stank” at random and it makes her mad bc no one will explain the inside joke

after tony died, peter texted her almost every day to check up on her

there are billionaire daddy/daughter dances, the starks were in attendance (until y/n deemed herself “too old” for them at age 11)

sometimes y/n would take over the shop and blast her dad’s music, getting really into it. tony would take a few moments to watch the prodigy he couldn’t believe he created

birthday parties were always a treat, especially after the avengers joined your family

also tony snuck you drinks every once and a while

“tony, she’s just a kid! don’t give her that” -steve

“my daughter, my rules, sucker!!”

when you were working in the shop, it wasn’t uncommon for you to hurt yourself

and tony would always patch you up, whether you needed bandages, ice, or just a kiss to make it better

pulling all-nighters on inventions

(sorry if this one makes you uncomfortable?) having to go to pepper when you had your first period

“JARVIS, can you call pepper for me? it’s an emergency”

“emergency? should i call the paramedics?”

“NO!”

she also took you bra shopping and you kept making boob jokes

“you really are your father’s daughter”

tony tried to give you a curfew for iron-mech things, but it didn’t last very long

you didn’t listen much, now tony knew how his father felt

dad jokes that make you cringe

“did you know the first french fries weren't actually cooked in france? They were cooked in greece”

*on the verge of tears* “please stop”

pepper loved getting pictures of you guys together

especially the ones of you guys passed out after an eager session of work

high-fives, so many of them

you have exactly one picture of the entire ironfam together (tony, you, pepper, happy, rhodey) and it’s hung up on your wall

you had a lot of nightmares as a kid, he had a baby monitor protocol programmed into JARVIS that alerted him when you woke up from a bad dream

posing for the paparazzi with your dad just for shits and giggles

the infamous Repulsor Misfire(tm) after a bad upgrade, it ended in two smashed windows, a medium-sized fire, and a hilarious security recording that tony had saved to his phone, not one of your prouder moments

you used to sneak up on the avengers and take selfies with them, some are priceless

your lockscreen is a picture of you and your dad making “hulk faces”

when you were a kid, you rode on tony’s shoulders for hours

he took you to disney world a handful of times (what? he could afford it)

being two engineers/mechanics, you guys needed a lot of lotion, (i cant stop picturing this) so you or tony would randomly pull out lotion and offer it to others before putting it on simultaneously

pulling pranks on rhodey

your personal favorite was the confetti cannons

“god, i could barely deal with one stark, but two? they might as well dig my grave”

sometimes it was just your job to embarrass each other in front of coworkers

“yeah, when y/n was little she was afraid of the monster in her closet, she thought cookie monster was going to eat her” (a/n: this is from experience dont @ me)

“when i was a kid i walked away from my dad when he wasn’t paying attention because i wanted a snack and i couldn’t find him when i came back. i went to investigate a while later and he was crying in the corner because he thought he lost me. almost ordered an AMBER alert because he left the front door open on accident”

your dad literally loved you so much

“where are you going?”

“out”

“can i ask where?”

“no”

“dont get all snippy with me!”

“i’ll be as snippy as i want to be!”

“oh, no, you wont!”

“watch me!”

^sometimes you guys got into some comical arguments

you were just trying to keep tradition alive and buy him another funny tie

tony has seen security footage of you doing various dumb things (that he is also guilty of) and asking you about it later

“hey, mini me, get your ass down here!”

“yeah, dad?”

“what is this?”

“uh...surprise? we need a new window!”

and there have been a few weird times he’s grabbed both your cheeks and stared at you

“hi dad?”

“i’m very lucky that your mean old mom let me have you, you turned out perfectly”

one father’s day you bought a card that had nothing to do with father’s day and crossed a bunch of stuff out with sharpie

he thought it was the funniest thing he’d ever seen

its on his desk now

(you get happy father’s day gift’s, too. he gets choked up every time)

you guys remember how clint was holding those drumsticks in aou? yeah, tony has drums and the two of you take turns going wild on them

the anniversary of your grandparents death is always a weird day, sometimes your dad is perfectly fine, and sometimes you have to give him some space

tony celebrated your birthday the 5 years you were gone

“happy birthday, sweetie. i love you”

when you met morgan, you saw a part of your father in her

now it was your job to protect her, for tony

#tony stark x daughter!reader #tony stark imagine #tony stark #iron man x daughter!reader #iron man imagine #iron man x reader #iron man #marvel #marvel x reader #marvel imagine #avengers #avengers x reader #avengers imagine

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robinofinashiro · 4 years

Text

- request from anonymous: “can you do a yandere alphabet for izuku with a quirkless s/o. cuz we need some broccoli loving out here lmaoo.”

- note: please remember that I don’t write NSFW for minors so if that’s what anyone was looking for in any of the alphabets, I’m sorry to disappoint and look forward to that for the adults that maybe requested.

- pairing: yandere! midoriya izuku x fem! reader

- request status: closed

A - Affection: How do they show their love and affection? How intense would it get?

Midoriya would be all over you. constantly. he’s a very clingy and delusional yandere that would not see anything wrong with the way he’s acting with you. he’d be constantly holding your hand, snuggling you, and telling you how much he loves you.

B - Blood: How messy are they willing to get when it comes to their darling?

if he had to kill someone because he felt as though someone was taking you away from him, he would. he would go to the ends of the earth to have you and he doesn’t care what it takes. he’d do it all. risk his hero career and all.

C - Cruelty: How would they treat their darling once abducted? Would they mock them?

he would mock them without realizing it. Midoriya would tell their darling all about their day and how many people he saved throughout the his shift without realizing that his darling has been longing for human interaction.

D - Darling: Aside from abduction, would they do anything against their darling’s will?

Midoriya just wants love. he obviously had familial love because of his mother but considering Midoriya is apart of the #Daddyissues squad, he never knew what it was like to have a father figure so that’s what brings him to just want constant affection from his darling.

E - Exposed: How much of their heart do they bare to their darling? How vulnerable are they when it comes to their darling?

midoriya would lay his entire heart out to them. he would tell them of the days he had with Bakugou, the day he got his quirk, all of it. he wants his darling to know everything that had happened to him in his part and he wants the same thing from them.

F - Fight: How would they feel if their darling fought back?

he would be so upset. midoriya wouldn’t understand why his darling was acting that way. he was just trying to love you and you were denying him of that! he would start crying those tears that he used to have as a child as a way to get you to stop what is it you’re doing.

G - Game: Is this a game to them? How much would they enjoy watching their darling try to escape?

midoriya doesn’t like it at all. he doesn’t think that him loving you or him kidnapping you is some kind of game. he would go through all of the stages from grief if you tried to leave him. he literally would go into a deep state of mental issues if he saw you trying to escape.

H - Hell: What would be their darling’s worst experience with them?

Midoriya’s clingyness. the fact that once he got home, he couldn’t shake them off. literally he wouldn’t let them get up for whatever reason and if his darling tried to use the bathroom or even get something from upstairs, he would go with them.

I - Ideals: What kind of future do they have in mind for/with their darling?

he wants all of the things he didn’t have growing up so basically becoming a father. he wants to do dad things with his kids. take them to a park, go to sporting events, teach them how to develop and control their quirk.

J - Jealousy: Do they get jealous? Do they lash out or find a way to cope?

oh fuck yeah Midoriya does. he doesn’t lash out at you in any way but he does towards the other person. the person could literally be asking you for directions with their partner standing next to them and Midoriya would think that they were trying to get with you.

K - Kisses: How do they act around or with their darling?

see letter A.

L - Love letters: How would they go about courting or approaching their darling?

he would TRY to attempt to court you but that flops immediately. he couldn’t stand to see you talking with other guys so as soon as he saw you, he would literally only give himself days before he kidnaps you or even starts to make plans for it.

M - Mask: Are their true colors drastically different from the way they act around everyone else?

Midoriya acts completely different in the sense that no one would realize how crazy obsessed he is with his darling. to the common eye, they wouldn’t realized that he literally had you trapped with him because they just think the two of you are constantly in that puppy love stage.

N - Naughty: How would they punish their darling?

Midoriya tries not to punish you. he really only uses it as a last resort because he’d rather try and talk it out with you rather than using mental or physical punishment on their darling. but when he does, it’s truly a fucked up experience. he would make them go essentially insane bc of the mind games he plays on them.

O - Oppression: How many rights would they take away from their darling?

he’d try to give them some kind of rights. he totally lets you watch television or read books but if he allows you social media, he would have to watch what you were posting and seeing. he lets you see your family but only on his time and for certain hours.

P - Patience: How patient are they with their darling?

very patient! he could literally have you fighting him in the middle of your living room, quirks and all, and he still wouldn’t try and punish you. he would try to justify it all and see that you did it for some other reason. so yeah, you got lucky.

Q - Quit: If their darling dies, leaves, or successfully escapes, would they ever be able to move on?

midoriya is CRUSHED. he would probably pass away himself. he can’t live without you and he knows that there is no one just like you so since he couldn’t find a replacement, he would literally just end it all bc he wouldn’t know what to do with himself.

R - Regret: Would they ever feel guilty about abducting their darling? Would they ever let their darling go?

Midoriya?? never. what he sees himself doing is absolutely okay in his eyes. he doesn’t see him kidnapping you as a wrong. he justified it in his head already so he would never feel guilty about it.

S - Stigma: What brought about this side of them (childhood, curiosity, etc)?

See letter D

T - Tears: How do they feel about seeing their darling scream, cry, and/or isolate themselves?

he gets almost emotionally scarred over it. he doesn’t understand why you’re doing all of that. he isn’t hurting you. he isn’t punishing you. all he’s doing is keeping you away from the villain infested world. why are you doing all that??

U -Unique: Would they do anything different from the classic yandere?

outside of the whole no punishment thing, probably not. he’s very protective and clingy to you so he’s more worried abt giving you affection and wanting to show you that he means no harm.

V - Vice: What weakness can their darling exploit in order to escape?

honestly, Midoriya doesn’t have many. everyone sees him as this soft yandere but midoriya doesn’t have a lot of weaknesses that he shows you. it would be unlike him to show you the bad parts of him so you don’t get any ideas.

W - Wit’s end: Would they ever hurt their darling?

see previous answers.

X - Xoanon: How much would they revere or worship their darling? To what length would they go to win their darling over?

you are midoriya’s god. he worships the ground you walk on. he would go to VARIOUS lengths to worship you. literally don’t test him on that bc he is one of the more delusional if not the most delusional so he sees what he’s doing as normal.

Y - Yearn: How long do they pine after their darling before they snap?

see previous answers.

Z - Zenith: Would they ever break their darling?

mentally, kinda? physically no.

#bnha imagine #bnha x reader #bnha #yandere bnha #mha #mha imagine #mha x reader #yandere mha #my hero academia #my hero academia imagine #boku no hero academia #boku no hero x reader #midoriya izuku #midoriya izuku imagine #midoriya izuku x reader #midoriya izuku x you #yandere midoriya izuku

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purecamp · 4 years

Text

RE: Sharon

okay so, i think this has been a long time coming. back when people were anonymously harassing me, i guess they wanted to bully a traumatised 17 year old into a statement, and i definitely wasn’t gonna give in to that. i guess i can speak now.

i want to be VERY clear on a few things.

1. i do not, in any way, support or excuse the previous genuinely racially insensitive behaviour (so not the RHPS mix up, for example) of sharon. i never have, as you will have seen on posts about it before.

2. you should always believe the victim until proven otherwise.

3. believing the victim does NOT mean you should immediately jump on, cancel, and harass the accused, or their friends and family.

4. i am not defending her nor am i claiming the accusations are false.

so now i’m going to share some thoughts. you’re under no obligation to read, however, do NOT send me abusive asks or demands without reading the whole thing. or just don’t in general, because i’m sick of it.

first of all i need you to understand that what went down at the end of june was very traumatic for me. you can laugh all you want if you’re going to be a dick, but that’s what it was. i have been a fan of sharon since 2016, when i was 13 years old, and so she’s been a huge part of my adolescence as i’ve grown into the person i am today. i was shy, insecure and young, and through my devotion to her, the new friends i made because of her, and my increasing confidence, i changed and grew a lot into someone i am happy to be, partly due to her. i held her very close to my heart, as you all know. the allegation was devastating to me, and i openly and truthfully admit that i cried on and off for a full week after they came out. any time i thought about her or saw her name, i would start to tear up and cry again. i felt totally crushed, and essentially began grieving the loss of someone i loved.

i want to be sure that you know i did not idolise sharon. i never wanted to be her or be like her, nor did i view her as a role model. drag queens as a whole are not role models, they are entertainers who originally used to thrive on shock, deviance and contemporary culture before drag race became a thing. she was never my idol, but i loved her art and i cared for her as a person.

for a good while i avoided her entirely, online and in my own mind. i was horrified and in too much pain to brush it aside, as i expect everyone was. i had read the document, and would revisit it to hurt myself, until i realised how damaging that was to my mental health, and vowed to stop. i never viewed it again, which is why some of the details i won’t be discussing purely bc i don’t remember, and i refused to think about it, rereading old favourite series to distract myself and burying my head.

in recent months i’ve allowed myself to think on things a little more, and formed my own opinions on the matter. i may be wrong, i may not. for now, none of us know the full truth.

i can say with full certainty that the nature of sharon and annecy’s relationship was unusual and unhealthy. i do NOT believe it was predatory, nor intended to manipulate, cause harm, or gain something sinister.

it seems to me that what is described happening, for the most part, is true, but not as sinister and deliberately harmful as it has been presented to us. we all know people around us, people who love us, can cause us harm unintentionally, and this is what the situation strikes me as. (i maintain the fact that i could be wrong, however, please take my thoughts with a pinch of salt and not as gospel). i believe that their parents should have been more aware and more careful. i think they should have used more discretion. i think sharon and other adults should have been better, and they weren’t.

what happened to them is heartbreaking to read about, and i really feel for their pain and trauma. i don’t believe this trauma was inflicted intentionally, nor do i agree with (the fanbase mostly) the presentation of sharon as an evil, p*dophilic predator, preying on a helpless young girl. annecy was in an inappropriate place for someone of their age, at the time, and sharon misused her power, not in a position to be responsible like she should’ve been. to be clear, though: she was not a sexual predator or p*dophile, and these accusations which have come purely from fans and not from the document itself, should be cut right now.

i want everyone involved to have access to the resources they need in order to recover, learn, change, and grow. i don’t hate anyone involved. i want this to be clear as well.

furthermore - the document has since been deleted. a few things i know are that sharon has been in contact with lawyers, understandably, and this is why she hasn’t made a statement as so many people are demanding of her. if you think having a lawyer makes you guilty... i don’t know what to say, other than that’s a weird view to have. i don’t know if the deletion is to do with the lawyers, or if it was their own decision. i also know that they have gone on to accuse lists and lists of people - some that i can remember including morgan mcmichaels, jinkx monsoon, alaska, alaska’s brother cory, detox, bendelacreme - of inappropriately touching them while they were a minor, as well as (proven falsely) claiming that aquaria was also abused by sharon, and sent underage nudes to her. again, this was not true, and at least for me, casts doubt on the credibility of the idea of sharon as an evil person and determined abuser.

like i said - i’m not saying that sharon didn’t act inappropriately, because she 100% did, and i find this very upsetting. i’m just saying that i don’t believe there was deliberate ill-intention or harm behind any of what happened, besides a fucked up situation between some fucked up people.

i don’t know how to end this, so i’ll leave it here. i hope this makes some kind of sense and that i haven’t dug myself into a hole.

i don’t support or excuse what she did. i don’t deny that it happened. but i don’t think i hate her anymore.

lastly, i have been given permission to tell you to direct any rude comments to my legal representative @veronicasanders who read through this for me, who will “happily rip their assholes out of their throats for harassing you.”

i understand that you may have criticism for me, but i have thought long and hard about my opinions and i hope you can respect them.

#my thoughts

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booksinsteadofdrugs · 3 years

Text

my thoughts on captain america: civil war (2016)

wow i haven't watched this movie in a while everyone looks so different

okay yeah, start the movie with bucky being tortured why not, it's not like i feel bad enough for him already

seb... babe i love you but who made you say отвечач instead of отвечать (okay okay, i'm just joking i know it's a small pronouncation mistake)

steve&nat teaching wanda how to watch her back during a mission is so cute (also wow, my queen has come a long way since this movie)

"he's cute go on pet him" SAM STOP PQJDOWBDIW

i feel like rumlow could've been used more in these movies why did they just kill him off like that

"who's the homeless person on the couch" i love howard

"if that's true you'll be a great man someday" and he did become a great man howard, he did, indeed

tony feels guilty about sokovia, wanda feels guilty about lagos and bucky feels guilty about his past. give them a break marvel

zemo switching into his own accent as soon as he got the hydra agent tied up lmao

"compromise where you can, and where you can't, don't. even if everyone is telling you that something wrong is something right. even when the whole world is telling you to move, it is your duty to plant yourself like a tree and say no. you move." sharon believed that with her whole heart and look what they did to her now I'M MAD

"staying together is more important than how we stay together" and she gave her life for them at the end no matter how much she didn't want to go

THE KING HAS ARRIVED (we miss you chadwick)

''we have orders to shoot on sight" meanwhile bucky: oooh lemme get some plums

ok so caramel chocolate bars are bucky's favourite, that's good to know

awww bucky couldn't even control his strength in this movie (throwing people off the stairs, hitting them with bricks, punching the shit out of them) and now he is barely even using his metal arm bc he's scared of killing people AWW MY BABY

i swear to god if sam wasn't there to save these two's asses all the time *eye roll*

oOOHHH THE CHASING SCENE WAS SO GOOD

when bucky grabbed that motorcycle we all felt something right?

i remembered how much it broke my heart when rhodey said "congratulations sam, you're a criminal"

vision cooking for wanda is still the cutest thing in this movie

"so you like cats" SAM

the fact that they were so scared of bucky that they had to put him in an extremely protected capsule thing... THE POWER HE HOLDS

"pregnant?" "uh, definitely not" and a few years later we see morgan wearing her mother's helmet WHY AM I MAKING MYSELF CRY

i love how steve was actually about to sign the accords until tony mentioned wanda

i forgot how much i wanted to punch zemo in this movie, he was literally so desperate to find bucky that he had to turn 7 billion people against him

"let's talk about your home, not romania, certainly not brooklyn no" well, we have some news for you zemo

the look on bucky's face when he sees the notebook and how he immediately starts screaming after hearing "рассвет" hurts my soul

BUCKYNAT BUCKYNAT BUCKYNAT

sebastian looked so ripped in this movie holy moly

wtf he really is like a death machine he could've easily killed steve in that helicopter scene

OH I FORGOT THIS WAS TOM'S FIRST APPEARANCE IN THE MCU WTF

"it's so hard for me to believe she is someone's aunt", "we come in all shapes and sizes you know" AUNT MAY I ADORE YOU

"i retire for like what 5 minutes and it all goes to shit" well he's not wrong

"move or you will be moved" ayo always steals the show with one line (tfaws spoilers guess?)

the scene that started it all guys "can you move your seat up" "no"

"thinks for thanking of me" SCOTT LANG IS A TREASURE ALRIGHT

"suit up" YEAH AND DON'T THINK ABOUT THE CONSEQUENCES SHARON WILL PAY FOR BRINGING YOUR TOYS

when the craziest thing happened in the mcu was spidey joining the avengers ah good old times

the airport fight was sooo good omg

i love t'challa is just like ''just lemme kill barnes i don't care about your white nonsense"

"i didn't kill your father" "then why did you run?" UHMMM I DON'T KNOW SIR MAYBE BECAUSE YOU'RE ALWAYS TRYING TO CHOKE HIM BEFORE HE HAS A CHANCE TO EXPLAIN HIMSELF??

scott's "hohoho" will never not be funny for me

this movie got me so hyped up for a possible buckynat storyline dude i'm still mad, they had such potential

peter getting scared of tony approaching him shows how hard their job actually is i feel so bad for them

vision accidentally shooting rhodey OH MY HEART CAN'T TAKE THIS

and wtf did sam do tony for fucks sake

zemo calling the hotel from moscow so they can find the body in the bathtub lsndjsbdjs he's such a diva

avengers getting treated like criminals is still pissing me the fuck off

"you better go get a bad cop cause you're gonna have to go mark furhman on my ass to get information out of me" OKAY MY FAV SAM WILSON LINE

zemo killing all the winter soldiers instead of waking them up is a great way to show his ideology actually

"there's a bit of green in the blue of your eyes" well that sounds poetic

i don't know which is worse: seeing tony watching his mom killed, or the amount of guilt bucky must've felt in that moment, or the way tony managed to keep his cool until he realized steve acted like he didn't know the entire time AGH IT HURTS

"i remember all of them" and that look on his face SEBASTIAN STOP

the fight between steve&tony&bucky was actually one of the best scenes in the mcu in my opinion, especially when bucky's arm gets destroyed (seriously tho, watching the way he pushes tony into the wall, trying to rip off the arc reactor with his metal arm and the fury in his eyes agh i love this scene)

aww zemo deleting the voice message of his wife before attempting to kill himself broke my heart

i remember crying in the cinema watching steve and tony beat the shit out of each other... my friend who's never seen any of the mcu movies before was looking at me like i was an alien

bucky still trying to protect steve by gripping tony's foot i- HE LOVES STEVE SO MUCH

oh when tony lifted his hand to protect his face with that terried look, he thought steve was gonna finish him

i!!! wanna!!! die!!!

"are you tony stank?" stan lee we miss you, you beautiful man♡

"i've been on my own since i was 18" having multiple illnesses, and probably mental ones as well, steve only had bucky on his side. he was the only one who always got his back, making sure he was okay, always protecting him. so he knew he had to do the same. bucky was the best friend he ever had.

soo, this gave me enough trauma for today. i think i'm gonna go cry until the next episode of tfaws.

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loniereads · 3 years

Text

cr: Sufficiently Advanced Magic

*spoiler warning*

Chapter 1 - 5

Chapter one

“I was prepared in a thousand different ways that didn’t matter” - Me for every test I’ve ever taken ☺️✨✨

Omg is he gonna go look for his brother 🥺 This book said found family but make it literal - side note, love the name Tristan.

I hope it’s explained as to WHY hundreds of 17 year olds are enduring a judgment to their possible death????

Imagine you’re brother going basically missing, your mom leaving, and then your dad pulling you out of school so you can prepare to possibly ✨die✨

“It could take years to grow strong enough-” 🥺 He’s going to sacrifice years of his life and risk certain death just for a chance to reunite his family is this book gonna make me cry?

I don’t like his name as much as I like his brothers but yanno whatever- how do you even say Corin

I already hate the dad??? Hello? Your first son is gone and your second could follow in his fate and you don’t even see him off?? Fuck you buddy why are book dads such assholes

“I loathed hurting people. I always had.” so i have decided that if anything happens to Corin I will kill everyone in the room and then myself. WHAT A CUTIE SWEET SOUL

If this book forces him to hurt someone I’ll riot-

Oh my gosh he hates fighting but he’s willing to fight for his brother I LOVE HEALTHY BROTHER RELATIONSHIPS they’re so pure

Corin is so nice to try to explain all of this weapon stuff and rune stuff to me like I have any idea wtf he’s talking about- he’s talking and I’m like I’m just happy to be here ☺️

I feel like the fact that he’s paying for everything he takes is important- like maybe other people just take and don’t leave anything? But he’s like here’s a coin for you scary tower~

“It was too cute to die” why do I love Corin so

What a cute ass sweet ass cinnamon roll, my god🥺

HE FELT GUILTY FOR KILLING A SHADOW SNDKDNSK I love him sm what a king

Chapter two

Why does everything he say sound so intelligent

ldmoaha not Corin having a convo with a book

It’s been too long since I read a normal romance book why did my brain just decide to ship Corin and a BOOK

Ok but him taking time to ask about his brother has me so soft

What the flip chapter 2 was so short??? ):

Chapter three

“You shouldn’t have done that” how ominous and amazing and I love it

He so casually was like OH LOOK A DEAD BODY OH LOOKIE PEOPLE

Omg is he gonna find his brother in here- OH MY

OMG HE DID AHHHHH

just... kidding. He did infact not find him.

Oh wait someone younger than him though- so is going into the tower a choice? That would make it a little better. Like you decide when you go in or? I NEED MORE INFO PLS

The word resh is growing on me

He risked his gold key on her 🥺

I love this little merry band of criminals- also just hoping the kid doesn’t yanno....die

omg Keras is out here crushing stones with his bare hands 😏 hellooooo

Wait I’m so conflicted??? I want to trust Keras and Vera but I also want to trust the book alsnsish

Vera is a whole mood I really hope she’s not like evil or just a weird thing in the tower or idk whatever I want her to stay

AWWAIT ☹️☹️☹️ They left Keras behind- that can’t be it. He’s gotta come back right? Like book person is gonna save him? Right!!??

Chapter four

VERA SUCH A BADDDDIE

This ‘kid’ they’re carrying is just making out like a bandit, he’s just getting carried through the tower 😂

WOW FUCK YOU VERA??? UH I HOPE SOMETHING KILLS HER-but not rhe kid 😔

Okay this might be a weird jump- but WHAT IF THE BOOK ENTITY ISSSSS HIS BROTHER??????????? Like the book person seems to really care if Corin lives? so it’s either just like a really caring person, OR HIS BROTHER

Pls let me be right

That would be so cool

The book entity helped him to finish the rest completely? Is this allowed? This feels not allowed

Corin: fighting monsters with criminals in a magical tower, very time sensitive needs to escape quickly

Also Corin: lemme just wrote a little diary entry ✨☺️

So obviously he’s going to get to keep his memories

Also like he got out of the tower so easily? What?

“And don’t let anyone hassle you about your attunement.” HOW VERY OMONIOUS OF YOU TO SAY

Honestly- Fuck Magnus Cadence

REPLACEMENT? What?

His childhood bestfriend is his half sister? I love that???? Instead of making them love interests they’re half siblings that’s cool as hell. We love childhood friends to siblings trope

I will reiterate, FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE

I hope we get to see their friendship bc I’m here for this trope

Chapter five

🥺 he sent the boys glove to his parents I’m so soft

Their relationship makes me so happy?? Like I love this. So they better reunite or I’ll riot

BROTHERLY RELATIONSHIPS ARE THE BESTTT

I miss Keras 🥺

I am so unsure of Sera. I do love the sudden sibling, and I really really hope they end up having a cool relationship and like she helps him find his(their) brother and hdjsjdjs

If anyone gives Corin a hard time for his attunement I’ll throw hands-

Not them earning points at their schools- All I can think about how is “10 points to gryffindor”

I love the word behooves

Can they go back into the tower already 💀 This down time is killing me. I want book entity, Keras and that boy who was unconscious the entire time back.

-side note, I absolutely love how all three of them(Keras, Corin, and Vera) were all so concerned with this unconscious boy and they literally carried him to complete safety. Who is this boy?? Will he come back? I miss him he better not be be dead. Vera can die but not unconscious boy.

I don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera... but she’s giving me “I’m better than you because I have a better attunement” vibes and I do not like that at all so if Icneed to I will pretend to doesn’t exist.

Aw the schools has like animal representatives decisions?? CUTE UM. - there’s way too many for my brain to keep up with but I love them anyway

Not them assigning kids to basically play pranks on everyone else and tell them if they don’t find the prankster kids they lose points- what a weird ass school

“You and Patrick were practically brothers” GIRL YOU CANT SAY THINGS LIKE THAT TO SOMEONE WHO HAS AN ACTUAL BROTHER WHO IS MISSING AND/OR DEAD

-Also I know Tristen isn’t dead because like then what would be the point huh? HUH? So he’s got to be alive

Or I’ll riot.

“A walking rainstorm” idk why but that is so fucking adorable. I love my new comfort raintorm, Corin.

I can’t wait for them(Corin and Sera) to meet up with their friends and they have to explain that they’re now half siblings.

Them reminding him to not lose his little sigil pin makes me feel like he’s going to lose or forget it ummmm

Imagine getting fucking EXPELLED because you forgot your pin on your other uniform.

I feel like that would be me honestly. Are people not just...forgetful in this universe??

Ngl i would hate to be in the tortoise division

Corins attunement is lamer but his division is called the Phoenix? Like that’s so much cooler than tortoise

The fact that sera is trying to convince me the Spider division isn’t real makes me feel like she’s in it???

I know my babey Corin didn’t mean this as snarky as I would have liked him to but I love this line so much.

SARCASTIC BOYS WITH DADDY ISSUES OWN ME AND IM NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT IT

Ngl I was hoping they would have roommates- I love a good school roommate dynamic

For the third time I would like to make my opinion to be known; FUCK MAGNUS CADENCE

Why has no one made a playlist for this book on Spotify? I am throughly disappointed

Not Corin being ghosted by his book-

I wish I had half the motivation Corin has? Like it’s my boys first day of school and as soon as he gets into his room he starts studying. I would have taken a nap

Oop jk as soon as he couldn’t find the rune he was looking for he went to lay in bed.

I’m sorry what in the hell is Wyddsday??? Did I miss them explaining to hat this universe has different names for it’s days of the week?? How am I supposed to know when this is Corin? Or what day it even is currently

World building is so intricate and interesting and I absolutely live for it- but it’s literally so frustrating sometimes learning and remembering everything

Okay Sera being less irritated about her studies being interrupted because it’s Corin is cute

Fuck

I still don’t know if I’m supposed to like Sera

Tashday, Fersday, Kyrsday, Tensday, Vasday, and Wyddsday- either I can’t count or they’re missing a day. And what order do they go in? I need a calendar insert pls and thanks

Wait wait did he just run into an ex? What is this sndlsnsin “long-buried emotions”??

Oooo we get a name. Cecily Lambert

I didn’t possibly think I could relate to Corin anymore than I already do but here I am

The dorm chiefs introduce themselves to everyone? How cute and Curtis didn’t seem at all annoyed by Corin asking so many questions I love when upperclassman in books aren’t rude for no reason. It’s such a tiring trait they often have smh

I need his exams to hurry up because I would very much like to get back to the fast paced tower scenes-

I know absolutely nothing about Jin but I love him immensely

#book commentary #if you’ve read this pls dm me ☺️#sufficiently advanced Magic #arcane ascension #uhhhhh I’ll just edit this post whenever I have thoughts

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flamingo-writes · 4 years

Note

For fluffvember: Law w/a crewmember that has mutual feelings for him, but they both repress it- until one night when she has a nightmare and she asks to cuddle? And he just can’t help but be sweet and affectionate bc it upsets him to see her like that- and maybe a breakthrough happens, like a confession or a kiss?

A/N: not quite as requested, and this turned out a little bit more angstier than I intended XD Also, I was listening to Something About Us by Daft Punk when I started to write this, and I love that song very much, so I decided to title this after the song tht basically gave me that inspirational push to start writing.

Fluffvember Post

Wordcount: 994

Warnings: mentions of smut at the end, a few swear words.

Something About Us — Law x Reader

It was some sort of painful silent burden Law insisted on carrying upon his shoulders. As much as he tried to treat your PTSD, it was impossible. As if you were immune to every medication he prescribed you, nothing ever ceased your nightmares. Nothing could prevent them, but Law´s presence sure helped you soothe your stress away and help you go back to sleep.

Law had always been there. As long as you could remember. He has always been there whenever a nightmare chased you. Reason why you room was next to his, the thinnest wall standing between you so he could easily hear when you were having a rough time and quickly get to your room and comfort you.

All those years of fighting back to back, watching over each other, had taken their toll. It was a unique kind of bond that connected the both of you. Something far stronger than just care, a blind faith and immeasurable trust. An unspoken attraction pulling you towards one another, masked under a shade of guilt. Why would you fall in love with your best friend? It was just wrong.

It was hard to predict when your nightmares would show up. They came without a warning, and you could spend weeks without having a single one, or spend three or fours sleepless nights because the moment you closed your eyes it all went to hell. Whatever triggered your nightmares was unknown.

However, this night, unlike any other, was the worst.

Usually you’d start whimpering, sometimes crying. This night however, was bad. Very, very bad. Screaming at the top of your lungs, cries for help, your voice scarring as if you were being tortured. Not only Law was awaken, but the entire crew.

Penguin kicked your door open, ready to attack whoever was harming you. However, he found Law kneeling next to your bed, holding your head in his hands, his forehead pressed against yours as you cried your heart out, uncontrollably, apologising.

“God, Law...it was awful, I-I thought I-I-I….Fuck, I’m sorry for waking you up, I-I didn’t me-mean to…”

“Hey, there’s nothing to apologise for…” Law whispered.

From the corner of his eye, he saw the crew poking inside, the same worried eyes reflected, echoing silently in the room, Law could sense everyone’s worry. He locked eyes with Bepo and silently jerked his head as if saying: it’s alright, I got this.

The mink nodded and told the crew to leave the two of you alone. Once your door closed, Law sat on your bed and hugged you tightly. Clinging to his hoodie, you buried your face in his chest and cried painfully. His arms tightening around you, trying to keep you from breaking into a million pieces, as if he was holding you all together. And he waited. The sound of your cries hurting in his chest, as the clock slowly moved around. After a few minutes, your cries had lowered into low sobs.

“[Name]-ya” Law purred. “Do you want me to stay here tonight?”

Slightly embarrassed by his question, you nodded shamefully. It had been years since the last time Law had stayed with you overnight because of one of your nightmares. Usually he’d stay there and distract you until you felt sleepy once more and went back to sleep. Rarely, very rarely, your nightmares were bad enough for him to stay with you for the rest of the night.��

Lying on the bed next to you, he held you close, as you snuggled next to him, burying your face in his chest. Law massaged your scalp, well aware that you were still crying despite sobbing in completely silence. He kissed the top of your head, hoping to comfort you.

Your heart was still racing, however, it wasn’t because of the nightmare. The sudden closeness with Law was what had your heart beating against your ribcage as if it was about to break your chest.

"Thank you, Law" you purred.

"It's nothing, I promised you I'd always be here for you"

The way his gentle voice warmed you made you cling even tighter to him. His words still echoing to your heartbeat's rhythm, you looked up from his chest and locked your stare with his.

"What's wrong, [Name]-ya?"

"Thank you, Law" You buried your face back into the base of his neck before he could notice the blush painting your face.

Still, Law could notice a faint trace pink beginning to color your cheeks before you snuggled back. He smiled pleased.

However, his smile soon faded away to the feeling of your lips innocently brushing his neck. Instead, his heart rushed, a shiver running up and down his body as images of his fantasies flashed in his mind. Fantasies in which he is hungrily claiming you, his best friend, as his. Guilty, he didn't try to stop those images from playing behind his closed eyes. He opened his mouth, your name escaping from his lips before he could even realise it.

"Hmmm?" You hummed looking back up at him.

His heart racing at a dangerous speed, and his gut twisted with a very peculiar anxiety he always tried to suppress. However the way your eyes were shining even in the dark of your room fueled that anxiety fluttering in his stomach.

Still flustered by the warmth of the lips he very much craved, he didn't think twice and simply leaned closer. Thirsty, he tasted your lips for the first time. His heart on his throat, and his primitive mind taking over. And yet, surprised that you responded to his kiss immediately.

Kissing him back, speechless, breathless, your hand moved to the back of his head, deepening the kiss you craved as much.

Swallowed by the darkness, the both of you released the unspoken frustration the both of you had been keeping to yourselves for years. Letting your bodies do the talk, you melted into each other for the night.

#one piece #one piece law #one piece imagines #one piece x reader #trafalgar law imagine #trafalgar law #trafalgar law x reader #trafalgar d law #trafalgar one piece #trafalgar d. water law #law x reader #Trafalgar x reader

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dandylion240 · 4 years

Text

✧ Founders CAS Challenge by @volcano-pasta ✧

Tagged by @simmeronnie Thank you so much. I decided to use this as an excuse to create my founders of my ts3 legacies in ts4.

Rules: Post all of your founders together to compare and contrast them! Share some details to see how similar or different they are. This can be done in CAS, or you can jump in game, or you can share old screenshots!

1) The Van Winkle Legacy - Founder Peter Van Winkle

Just the average absentminded scientist.

He is immortal due to being tricked by Emit Relevart.

He was married twice.

First wife Valari - their marriage ended in divorce

They had 4 children together

Second wife Jean - she died of old age

They had 4 children together

Valari was killed in a fire she set herself to kill Peter in after luring him into her trap by kidnapping his son.

Peter is now moving on from having lost Jean and is dating River. When Gen 6 starts we’ll see if she becomes wife number 3

Gen 6 currently on hiatus but I am working on it

More under the cut. It got really long, Plus evidently I write a lot.

2) Not So Ordinary Life - Founder William Bennett and his wife Jessica

This legacy started because William kept getting abducted by aliens. I asked myself one little question...what if the aliens weren’t as friendly as the game made them out to be? What if they had an agenda all their own? Thus the Bennett saga began.

Why Bennett? Because I gave him the same last name of my favorite character Elizabeth Bennett from Pride and Prejudice

William was abducted 4 or 5 times. I don’t honestly remember. It did result in two pregnancies.

The alien experiments done on him unfortunately had lasting side effects on his wife. She became prone to fits of anger, jealousy, uncontrollable sexual urges that resulted in multiple children she was unable to take care nor any desire to do so. Also resulted in an affair and a child from that relationship as well. Until she completely lost it and tried to kill her entire family.

William stuck by her because he felt guilty because of what the aliens had done to him.

He also lost his oldest child Sydney in a tragic house fire. She later came back to life through a science experiment but that’s another story.

Gen 6 currently on hiatus but being worked on

3) Not So Peaceful Life (a side legacy of NSOL) - Evelyn Bennett and her husband Shon Olivia

Evelyn is William’s alien daughter.

She married her older sisters boyfriend after meeting him again once she went away to University.

They were reluctant to move their relationship from friends to something more.

Shon’s estranged father hated her and on more than one occasion tried to kill her. He had been abducted by aliens that drove him to drinking.

Shon and Evelyn also took in his children from a previous relationship before he was sent to live with his Aunt. He didn’t even know about them until a case he was working on in Bridgeport let him to his ex girlfriends door.

Shon had two kids with Evelyn and two with his ex.

4th gen is on hiatus.

4) Not So Quiet Life (a side legacy of NSOL) Casey Bennett and his wife Lynn

Casey is the 3rd child of William and Jessica

Sydney sacrificed herself to save him in the fire that took her life.

Casey and his younger brother Gene never really got along until years later when Casey had his own breakdown and developed a drinking problem. Gene helped him through it.

Casey got a girl pregnant while he was at University and they lived together for the sake of their son Eddie.

He came home from work one day to find her gone and his son alone crying in his crib.

Through the help of is older brother Robert he was able to find a suitable nanny for his son.

He later married his son’s nanny.

Casey had two kids with Lynn besides Eddie.

Glitter is the continuation of his legacy with Hannah, Benjamin and Christopher Bennett.

5) Not So Reckless Life (a side legacy of NSOL) Gene Bennett and his wife Aimee.

Gene had emotional problems that developed after the death of this older sister Sydney. He felt responsible for the fire because he took out the batteries from the smoke alarm to operate a toy.

He got into drugs and drinking as a teenager but nothing really helped with the guilt he felt.

He became suicidal.

He became a target of his mother’s to vent her anger and unreasonable hatred on not helping with his own emotional problems.

Things started to turn around when he met his girlfriend (can’t remember her name) They lived together until he decided to sign up Sim Star Idol

Everyone was against him joining the show afraid that the pressure would be too much for him and he’d start drinking again.

If it weren’t for his brother Robert’s firm belief in him that he could do it that he did the show.

He didn’t win but he did meet the love of his life Aimee Vera.

Aimee’s parents were less than thrilled with her choice in men and did everything they could to break them up.

Aimee gave into their demands when Gene found out he was the father of twins from his previous relationship and she had died in child birth leaving him twin girls to raise.

He had a total of 7 kids.

Knights of Hope is the current gen and will continue once Glitter concludes. Currently on Hiatus

6) Bring Me Back To Live (a side legacy of NSOL) Sydney Bennett and her husband Tain Sugihara.

Sydney died in a tragic house fire as a teenager.

She was brought back to life by a highly experimental procedure

The scientists wanted to generate good will and funding for their experiment so they insisted she marry and they hosted a BC for her.

Tain Sugihara was the lucky winner

The experiment that brought her back to life led to her death five years later.

She had triplets but it was her son Jackson who developed the genetic degradation that would eventually lead to his early death.

The scientists wanted to continue the experiments in the hopes of perfecting or even duplicating their one and only successful resurrection.

Made to almost the end of gen 5 - indefinite hiatus

7) My lil Reagan’s Robin Fairchild and Dominick Reagan started it all.

I will one day post their story.

It is written but I want to fit it in so that it makes sense with where I’m at with my Reagan stories.

These two would be the grandparents or Jonah, Jayden, Raelyn and Sage.

Sage’s purple hair comes from Dominick

Dominick is a ghost now living with his elderly husband in their youngest son’s home.

My TS4 game play consists of mostly their descendants

8) Island Living Game play - Octavia Griggs and Wilson McCabe

I’ll probably just play them until the kids age up.

You may see their kids married to other sims later on

It was started to test out Island Living

9) 4x4 Challenge and game play - Reo Carmichael and Kasen Rocca

Reo is a well known actor

Kasen is an up and coming artist

The challenge was to start off with a 4x4 house and every 10,000 dollars they make they can add on another 4x4 room. They have to spend all but 500 dollars in the renovation.

Once the upstairs is complete and their kids are aged this challenge will end.

I have plans for their only son He will have his own challenge to accomplish

Hmm that’s a lot but the majority of my TS3 stories are on hiatus but will be coming back. I just want to have stuff written in advance. I do see I get obsessed with families mainly my Bennett’s and Reagan’s. I love my Van Winkle’s too but I tried to keep all the stories in together since they tell the same overall story.

Sorry I got a little long winded but I do love to talk about my stories and this helped me realize what I lived about them. Also why I struggle to let any of them even BMBTL.

Tagging: @fataleromeo @cillaben @izayoichan @ohsimtastic @amuhav @wannabecatwriter @justasimthing @cawthorntales and anyone else who wants to do this. Feel free to ignore if you want.

#founders cas challenge

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cuddleslutloki · 5 years

Text

alright here’s that fraternal twins au

thor and loki are fraternal twins who ofc look very different except! they share a birth mark on their hip that mirrors each other. just a little patch of pink-brown skin. they're sons of a wealthy lord and when they're pretty young loki is kidnapped and taken away and they never find him. this is like... medieval times bc i feel like it

so about a decade later thor has inherited the estate and the all the riches odin left. hela married up and she's like a fucking duchess or sth, and one day thor gets a letter from his beloved sister claiming she saw loki at a tavern. she says she saw the birth mark and it has to be him, but she didn't say anything or do anything she thinks since he was taken so young he might not remember her, so thor should try

so thor goes bc even if it isn't loki he'd rather know he tried. but he takes one look and he knows. that's his brother. and hela also lied bc it's not just a tavern. it's a fucking brothel

and a very seedy one owned by a warlord thor's familiar with. he has to be careful because if he pisses off this warlord there's no guarantee that hela would be able to rally the king to come to his aid. so instead he plays it cool. he buys loki for the night and is determined to have loki remember him so they can run away together. but loki is in work mode, so he's just trying to get in thor's pants.

thor is trying to tell loki to slow down, asks him his name and loki says it's whatever thor wants it to be, so thor says "then i'm calling you loki" and loki freezes. he rips thor's pants down and sees the birthmark and quietly says "so it was our sister the other night? it wasn't just some fever dream about finally being free?"

and thor is pissed bc loki sounds terrified at the fact that thor is real and in front of him, that there's hope

so he decides he's going to buy loki since everyone is for sale in this place and then he'll use any information loki has to start fighting to take this warlord thanos down (ofc it's thanos lmao)

so thor leaves loki in the room and tells him not to open the door unless it's thor, he even locks loki inside and he goes to the front to the barkeep and says he's considering buying the man they gave him

except there's a catch sales have to be approved as good matches bc they don't want to have a slave returned after they've been used or even retrained. so someone has to make sure that they'll be compatible for long-term use. ie, they need to see loki being used. thor has to either perform some kind of sexual act with his brother that he hasn't seen in ten years, or leave loki at the brothel and find another way to free him, or (as his temper wants) just kill everyone in the brothel and leave

so option a it is

he agrees and goes back to the room to tell loki what's going on, expecting loki to back out of things, but loki is like "i'm not going to let a blowjob keep me from my freedom" and thor's like O.O bc he didn't even get that far to thinking about what they'd even do bc he never thought loki would agree

so they end up in a little side room with some guy standing there, watching and evaluating them. and loki gets right to work. thor's pants are around his ankles and he's got his nose to thor's pelvis. thor doesn't know at first if he can get hard, but then loki does something with his tongue and all of his blood is in his cock

he's barely keeping himself from moaning loki's name. bc he can't give them away. thor's wires are being crossed because he loves loki so much and he's so glad he's finally been reunited with his brother and that he can buy loki's freedom, but this isn't how it should be... but it feels good, and loki seems to be going above and beyond what's necessary for the observing party. thor cums too damn quick but he's not even upset, he's kind of dazed, and the guy observing makes an amused little noise and says "it's almost like he wants to go home with you"

and thor laughs and nods, bc he still can't quite speak. and he takes loki home. he's pissed that they didn't ask for more, loki's price is like mid-tier for a slave and loki says it's bc he talks back too much. once they're home loki is more than happy to spill any info he has on thanos and thor starts planning to have him killed by a couple of his former 'children' who are the only two that have ever managed to escape (gamora & nebula bc ofc)

but he's also having a crisis bc within a few weeks loki's put in a little weight and he looks healthy and he seems so happy and thor is so fucking grateful. hela visits and they catch up and they don't talk about anything that happened to loki, thor especially doesn't.

bc all he can think about at night is how loki's throat felt convulsing around his cockhead

and he feels fucking awful bc loki went through 10 years of abuse and violence and he should be escaping it, not living with a brother who thinks about abusing him

part of him wants to tell loki to go live with hela

every other part of him can't stomach the thought of ever waking up without loki in his house again

so he says nothing. he continues on as he has, he bonds with his brother, loves him, and suffers silently and tries to purge himself of these thoughts but he just. can't. and one night, like two or three years after he's managed to rescue loki, they're in the library together and loki sits down a little too close to him on the chaise. thanos was killed in the spring, nebula and gamora have all of his power and resources. loki has been acting happier and lighter than ever and thor is so glad, but even more guilty bc when he touches himself he hears loki's laugh as he cums

and loki kisses him on the cheek and he thinks nothing of it. loki has been affectionate, almost like when they were boys, and he figures that they were separated so young and for loki it must be nice to give some kind of innocent affection like that

bc despite everything thor sees loki as innocent

he knows loki's done some very cruel things, but it was all to people who used him without his consent, so thor feels loki was justified in every awful and ugly thing he did to survive, and he's told loki as much

but then loki kisses the corner of his mouth and thor freezes

and loki smiles and gives this happy little hum and says "you talk in your sleep sometimes. mostly you call my name. if i come to your room and touch you, you usually settle. so i came to you last night, but you weren't crying. you weren't upset"

thor's heart feels like it can't decide between stopping and racing, he can barely breathe. he remembers waking up with cum sticking his cock to his sleeping pants

loki nuzzles his cheek and is so sweet and tells him "i know i shouldn't want you, right? it's not normal, not natural, but i haven't been able to stop thinking about how your cum tasted. i've almost forgotten." thor can't move. loki takes the book he was reading out of his hands and straddles his waist and he is just sitting there silently, watching his brother

loki smiles at him and presses their hips together and thor gasps bc they're both hard. loki leans in and licks his ear, then kisses it "you make me feel safe. sucking your cock was the first time i had sex i actually wanted. i want to know what it's like to have someone i love touch me. you were rutting your cock into your bed, moaning my name, and you said you love me. you weren't even awake, you didn't know i was there to hear you, but i did. please"

and thor can't take another damn word so he kisses loki and pulls him in close, and it's all so overwhelming that he's shaking as he picks loki up and goes to loki's room, conscious of the fact that it should happen in loki's territory, as it were

they have very slow, passionate sex where loki is lavished in attention and cums until he's so exhausted he's barely moaning, but he's smiling the entire time, and when thor finishes he's just chanting loki's name over and over

and they lay cuddled up in bed, facing each other, and they kiss and talk, and loki touches thor's birthmark, then his own, and says maybe they have them bc they're soulmates

the end

#thorki #thunderfrost #baylen fic #might make a moodboard for this tbh

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vrainsrewatch · 5 years

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episode 19 thoughts

this is... the most screenshot heavy post i’ve made so far, lmao, so please bear with me. as i’ve said, this is one of my favorite duels, and there’s a lot that gets covered here. like, seriously, i haven’t written this post out yet but i can guarantee this will be my longest so far lmao.

the beginning of the episode starts off fairly standard, and mostly dueling:

i really do love the pacing of this duel. i was glued to the edge of my seat while watching these episodes. i remember it so clearly, too, because i’d been binge watching from episode 16 that day, and got to like, 24 by the time i stopped, lmao.

ai does a lot of cute/funny stuff this episode, to help break up some of the more dark tones of the rest of it, like this:

it really makes me miss hi in this form :( i really like his soltis form, don’t get me wrong, but i miss him on yusaku’s wrist lol. i would say when things were less angsty, but, well. lmao.

we very quickly get akira’s rad boss monster summoned out:

and seriously, i just love the animation for it. it’s so sick. the door, the fire, how it looms behind him at first.... aaaaaa. so cool.

and of course the classic:

the worst part about this line is it’s said so often (esp in arc v LOL) that i actually. have slipped up and said it in normal, day to day conversation before. my boyfriend looked at me for like a minute and gave me the deepest sigh i’ve ever heard the first time i did that pff.

also:

i couldn’t not screencap this, given what my blog is for LOL

every time something reminds me of that painful final duel, i have to screencap it and make you guys sad with me. if i have to be sad seeing all this stuff, knowing where their relationship goes and how the series ends, so do you.

also, though, i forgot how often this was brought up before the bohman duel lmao. it makes that theory look a lot more credible, so it’s cool that it had all these little hints towards it, even if it ultimately wasn’t true.

seriously, my heart. i don’t think i need to talk much about this scene to make y’all sad, but really. they went from this to i loved you. ugh, god, i’m so sad thinking about it lmao.

there is so much to talk about between akira and playmaker and even blue angel in this episode, so i guess we’ll start here.

it is hard to decide that you want to take control of your trauma and do something about it. it is not easy. to see yusaku fight for that right so thoroughly is incredible, and really, really validating.

more sadness! seriously, this is too much. this deck was created specifically for him by ai. i don’t like this anymore lmao

but even besides that, often times the protag’s decks mean a lot to them, obviously, but i love that it wasn’t built strictly by yusaku. his cards were literally made by ai, and i think that’s such a cool twist.

but then, akira’s speech:

i talked last time about akira wanting to handle things himself, and i briefly touched on him thinking he knows best...

but i really admire how calm yusaku stays at that tbh. he gets angry, reasonably so imo, but he takes this so well. i know i was a much more volatile kid then he is, so respect lol

i’ve spoken at length already about akira, but i also want to talk again about how oblivious he is. he is so blinded by his own thoughts and feelings on the situation that he doesn’t stop to think about how yusaku might be feeling -- and worse, honestly, how his sister might be feeling.

it was why he was so visibly shocked when emma mentioned a few episodes ago that aoi wasn’t just a little kid anymore. it’s so clear that he still, at the moment, sees her as the six year old girl he swore to protect, and not the sixteen year old person she’s become. he doesn’t think about how she might be feeling towards his actions, or why she does what she does.

this is highlighted as early as episode 6 iirc, when he asks her why aren’t you happy? as much as i, personally, dislike his character, i can’t deny it’s very realistic and well written.

speaking of aoi:

i love how she’s written in this episode, too. but her entrance here is great, and i love how she stands up to him about this. it’s minor, but it’s still a good step. when she’s blue angel -- or blue girl, or blue maiden -- she feels comfortable doing that. at least a little, and it obviously grows throughout the series. i hope that transfers over to the real world for her, too.

and then, we finally get the full story:

i remember flinching when he started talking about it, remembering the shots of yusaku getting electrocuted from his duel with revolver.

i really love this. i said it last episode, but vrains handles yusaku’s trauma so realistically and it’s amazing.

i remember originally staring open mouthed at my tv screen while this part played. we got a bit of it from the other episode, but the full context truly shocked me. where’s that post that says “who thought this was an acceptable backstory to give to a card game protag” bc honestly??? YEAH

it’s still hard to watch. it’s still hard to see play out, even if it’s only fiction. even though i’ve seen these clips so many times, and written about them in detail a few times too. doesn’t matter lol. watching it in context actually still made my stomach drop.

which leads me to talk about reactions to this, actually:

the two that vrains focuses heavily on are blue angel’s and kusanagi’s, and they contrast really well here imo.

blue angel’s is a normal reaction. it’s horrified, both at the thought of it happening and at the fact that someone would actually do that to another person -- a six year old child, no less.

kusanagi’s is strained. he is angry hearing about this, thinking about jin. we’ve been told, and have seen in the last few episodes, how much the lost incident impacted kusanagi and his brother, but i really love that the show tells us that here, too, and shows the difference between hearing about a tragedy and being involved in some manner.

i did not expect it at all when first watching vrains, and honestly, it still impresses me how gracefully they handled it coming off of arc v (cough, shun i love you but really cough cough). no hate on arc v at all, it’s my third favorite ygo very close behind gx, but the difference between the two on how they handle these things is staggering.

this whole section makes me thing that ryoken talked to yusaku fairly often, after the first time. which is something i don’t see brought up often? but that’s so important imo. it meant that yusaku had someone encouraging him not just once or twice, but on the regular, but also it meant that ryoken was constantly risking himself to comfort that child.

we don’t see too much of ryoken when he’s a kid, but we do see him scared and crying over the lost incident. the fact that he was able to talk calmly to this child so many times is really amazing. it also makes more sense as to why ryoken feels so guilty over calling the police -- he probably felt that maybe if he had just kept up his encouragement, the kids would’ve all gotten out okay and his father wouldn’t be in a coma.

this was so powerful. it’s obvious, and i think anyone with half a brain would understand that the LI isn’t something that a kid would recover from easily, but i love this anyways.

he wasn’t saved. and even if he was in body, it’s still something he and all the other victims will live with for the rest of their lives.

this also is something i don’t feel like people bring up enough, but does this mean that yusaku went around asking the kids at the hospital when he was rescued? it’s not hard to believe they were all put together, at least for a short amount of time, but it’s still something i feel like people overlook.

i also love this, because it’s nice foreshadowing to how revolver feels. he’s not captured, not like yusaku and the lost kids were, but he is a prisoner. and just like ryoken saved yusaku, way back then, he is determined to repay the favor.

not just because of that, either. because that voice meant so much to him. because that voiced saved him. because that voice understood him, and was there for him in his hardest moments. god i love them.

i love this shot. it’s so dramatic, how the match the drum beats with flashes of everyone’s reactions.

but it drives home his point, and while i know most of akira’s development came through emma and aoi, i’m sure this helped, too.

i’ve sung vrains praises this entire post, but i’ll do it again -- this is incredible. this is so realistic. it’s so well portrayed. and it’s really honest to god incredible that we got a protag in ygo who was shown going to therapy.

ygo has always dealt with some pretty dark subject matter, and it’s never really been shy about showing it on screen. i’m not saying that at all. arc v obviously dealt with some pretty heavy stuff, and while i haven’t seen zexal (keep shaming me please) i know it does, too. 5ds obviously has the dark signer arc, and the later arcs concerning bruno and also yusei’s father, and gx has... well, it’s entire third and fourth season.

but we see everyone healing via card games. we see those shows talk about these things, but kind of at the same time, skirt around the subject matter; or if they do go deep into it, they pull out (ie 5ds) or the characters don’t get resolved properly (ie arc v).

idk where i was going with this but i just really love that this happened, this was shown on screen, and they stuck to yusaku’s character. they didn’t just... up and make his trauma and his world view disappear at the end. he has a bittersweet ending, but it suited him and his development. a lot of people were mad about it, and i get it -- i wanted him to be happy, too.

but that’s not always the case, and it’s really important to me that vrains doesn’t pretend it is.

anyways, though, i’m almost done with this episode i promise lmao. before the episode ends, we get this:

and i think it’s honestly kind of cruel that akira says this, after everything, and still maintains his point of handling it himself. he has heard, first hand now, how horrible the incident has scarred yusaku for life. and yet, he still is stubborn in refusing to relate or at the very least empathize.

what i mean by that, since we obviously see him attempt to last episode, is he refuses to look at it from someone’s else’s perspective or in a way that might make him uncomfortable. the way my boyfriend describes these kinds of people is that they “haven’t had their bubble popped”.

everyone has a bubble when they’re born, and that bubble shields you from realizing that the world is a cruel and hard place. even if you go through hardships, sometimes your bubble stays put, and you think that is the worst of what can happen.

i’m explaining this very poorly, because i’m running on not much sleep and i’ve been typing about this episode for like, far, far too long, but essentially, he refuses to step out of his comfort zone and recognize, in playmaker’s case, that he doesn’t have a right to interfere and that playmaker’s desire to handle it himself is justified and helpful for his healing. and in aoi’s case, that just because he does a lot of good for her doesn’t automatically mean ignoring her for work and keeping her locked in their house is an okay trade off. and also that she’s not a child anymore -- she’s nearly an adult and she deserves to be treated as one.

those thoughts seem to unsettle him. you can kind of see it in how detached he is after hearing all that come from playmaker. blue angel is visibly shaken up by what he’s said. akira doesn’t even flinch, because he’s not really listening right now.

i’m glad he learns to, or at least learns how to start, later on.

anyways, i think that’s enough for this post lmao. this took forever to type up, so let’s hope i actually have time to cover up to 21 here today LOL. if you read all that, thank you for your time on my kind of dumb vrains thoughts :’)

#vrains #episode 19

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sup-hoes-its-me · 5 years

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With Time III (Tobirama x Reader)

A/N: hi! So this is the last part. I hope ur ready bc I wasn't when i wrote it! It’s really been wonderful writing for Tobirama even though I may have made him ooc a lot of the time. Have fun with this last chapter guys and thanks so much for reading!

word count: 4775

Part One/Part Two/Part Three

I couldn't walk the same after the incident. My leg needed to be in a brace for the majority of the time, and I had to be extra careful when I moved because my ribs and lungs were still fragile. I hated it. I hated this feeling of being useless to everyone and everything that I worked so hard to protect.

I still worked with the Hokage in his office, giving him advice, listening to his plans and strategies, and signing documents with him from sunup to sundown. It wasn't enough. There were people out there risking their lives while I couldn't so much as go on morning runs anymore.

More than once, I'd cried myself to sleep. I would sit in my apartment and stare down at my leg brace, the bandages wrapped around my waist, and the crutches in the corner, and just sob until my throat stung dry. How could this happen to me?

Part of me wished I could have just died in the line of duty than live on and get sympathetic looks from people I passed in the street. I hated the way my fellow shinobi, those who I considered friends, looked down at me in a way you would a child or the elderly. I despised the shame that filled my heart.

“Y/N, are you even listening to me?” Tobirama sighed as usual, red eyes lifting from his desk to me.

I blinked. “Sorry, Tobi. I was distracted again.” With a frustrated shake of my head, I went back to work on whatever was placed in front of me. A boring c-rank mission report that barely needed to be skimmed. Instead of going in to focus on the mundane task of signing papers and reading poorly scrawled paragraphs, I felt a warm, calloused hand on the side of my neck. “Is something wrong?”

“I was about to ask you the same thing. You’ve been different recently.”

“I haven’t noticed.”

“It’s been months, Y/N, three whole months and you haven’t been the same.”

My words got caught in the back of my throat and suddenly my secrets were coming crashing around me. As much as I wanted to tell him how I felt, how everything was hurting me and I couldn’t enjoy my life like I did, I wasn’t going to mutter a word. My breath was shallow from shame and my cheeks paled out of simple indignity. My fingers fidgeted around in my lap nervously under his accusing gaze.

It’s a bit much to call him accusing. He was more concerned than anything, worried in a way that said he stayed up long nights with this on his mind. The bags under his eyes didn’t help my own assumptions. And if he were to be losing sleep over me, I would no doubt feel worse. I didn’t need the sympathy of the man I’ve come to admire, the man who despite having been a rival as a child I now saw as an equal.

“Listen, I can’t even begin to express the guilt I feel for-”

“Don’t pity me, Tobirama.”

His eyes widened just a bit before quickly narrowing. He stared at me fiercely, and I tensed under the touch of his hand on my bare skin, heat sinking into my collar and jaw. “I have never once pitied you, Y/N. Not even when the worst has happened to you have I pitied you. I know your strength.”

“Then why are you acting like this? Like you’re plagued with guilt, and you send me these side-eyed looks of sympathy when you think I’m not looking?” I questioned.

He took a deep breath, as if he were building up his patience or courage, I couldn’t be too sure which.

“I haven’t felt right since you got hurt. I’m not too sure how to explain it, but I feel weak. I feel like an idiot for sending you away with only a child as backup. I feel so guilty for not being there to protect you from all of this, because I can see that you’re in so much pain now that you’re crippled. I just-”

“Tobirama. Please. It’s fine.”

“No, it’s not. And I can never forgive myself for what I let happen to you.”

“Shinobi get hurt. Shinobi die in combat every single day,” I countered. He was the Hokage, and he cared about each and every one of his people, so why did he care so much about me, doing exactly as I was paid to do. I expected pain and suffering in this line of work, we all did. It was our sick reality. We trained children barely able to control their chakra to think sacrifice was good. Self-sacrifice is for the well-being of a nation, we were taught.,

His fingers tensed against my skin at the simple words. I watched as his jaw clenched and he turned to glare into my eyes. I no longer feared the fire in those red daggers. His firm voice broke the tense silence.

“You think I don't know that? Of course I know that my shinobi are going to get hurt and die in combat, and I can't do a thing about it. I've accepted that a long time ago,” he paused, sucking air through his teeth. “But it's somehow different with you. I can't accept that you might die one day. I can't accept the fact that it's not my fault you were attacked. I can't accept that it was you.”

I searched his eyes for answers. Something that told me what he was thinking. Only I felt like I was staring into the eyes of a man I barely knew. He looked pained. He looked desperate. Unlike the Tobirama I loved.

“Tobi…”

“Y/N, you keep me from being objective.”

I was completely lost. Lost in his eyes and his words and his frown that just itched to scream out all his troubles. “I don't know what to say. I don't- I can't,” I trailed off.

Softly, I reached up to take his hand, the one pressed against my skin. Then, I dropped it down into my lap, covering his hardened knuckles with both of my palms. My fingertips danced along his skin like feathers, but it was soothing. This feeling, of his skin against mine, it brought me back down to Earth if only for now.

Quietly, I said, “I'm sorry I've distracted you from your work. It's more important, I know that. I never meant to-”

“That's the problem. I'm beginning to believe you're more important than any of this.”

“Tobirama. Please don't say those kinds of things. You know you don't mean them. I'm your assistant, not your family...not your lover.” Deep breaths.

“I know that. That's why this is such a problem. I don't understand why I'm confusing my priorities, and seeing you here doesn't help,” the man groaned, shutting his eyes and grimacing. His hand squeezing mine.

“I'm sorry if my presence hurts you, Hokage-sama.”

“You know I didn't mean it in that way, Hatake.”

“I know. I just think you need to work out whatever is on your mind. You can't be stuck in the middle like this. It's only holding you back,” I said firmly, catching his gaze. “Just remember, your destiny lies with this village. You will have a great legacy, Tobi, but you have to be careful.”

But Hashirama would have said something else. Anyone who knew the pair well enough could have seen it. Tobirama's destiny was not with the village, it was something much less abstract, less broad and disconnected. Konoha was his eldest brother's child, Hashirama's destiny, and eventually his fate.

As much as I tried to avoid it, the inevitable crushing defeat of it all, Tobirama was the one I'd become completely entranced by. I needed him as much as I needed water and air. He was my destiny.

And I could only pray he could find it in himself to forget about me, this strange relationship we had between friends and lovers. It was dangerous, and I hoped he would make the right choice.

__________________

Tobirama chose his destiny, the one I wished against.

He couldn't keep himself from doing otherwise. He could have done what he thought was wise. What was best for the entire village, but he didn't. He must not have been thinking when he marched up the stairs of my apartment building in the middle of the night.

I lay in my bed, a book in my hand and a cup of long gone cold tea on my bedside table. The room was silent save for the loud gushes of wind to slam against the windows every few minutes or so. I stopped crying before I slept about a month before, and instead took to staring at the ceiling or rereading the pages of a novel mindlessly for hours. What else was there to do when sleep wasn't an option?

But a knock on my door was definitely unexpected. It had to have been around midnight or so when I heard that distinct series of four rapping knuckles against wood.

I stood, brushing down my old t-shirt, ignoring the way my hair stuck up in all random directions. When I opened the door, I was met with a fully dressed, fully awake Tobirama. He was much taller than me, especially when I slouched like this. I straightened up a bit and ran a quick hand through my hair to brush it out of my face and behind my ear.

“Tobi, is there something you needed that couldn’t possibly wait until tomorrow?” I asked, and the irritation was clear in my tone. I rested on hand on the doorknob while the other pressed into my hip, waiting impatiently for a response. I cared for the man dearly, but I wasn’t one to enjoy being woken up in the middle of the night for something insignificant.

“I could have waited until the morning if not for this terrible pain in my chest.”

“Are you okay?” My eyes searched his form for any sign of injury, but saw nothing. He didn’t look like he was in any pain, nor did he stand any different than usual. I reached out carefully and took his wrist in my small hand, pulling him into the apartment. I hoped to God that no one was watching the Hokage sneak into some woman’s apartment in the middle of the night. The scandals that would arise…

He sighed, shutting the door softly behind him, the click of the lock bringing me comfort. We were alone. I don’t know why, but that thought brought me peace and anxiety all bundled into one ridiculous package. I wanted to spend time with him, but not like this. It felt awkward, to put it simply.

I motioned for him to take a seat on the edge of my little bed, one of the few pieces of furniture I actually owned. As he scanned over the room and the walls, his brows furrowed into a knot. “After all this time, you still haven’t bought furniture?”

“I never thought it was important. Plus, I don’t get paid enough to afford those things.”

He shook his head, mumbling under his breath, “That’s absurd. If you needed more money, you could have simply asked me for a raise-”

“Tobirama, what are you here for really? You’ve somehow changed the subject,” I said plainly, looking down at his moonlit features in the darkness of my one room apartment. The only light was what came from between the drapes in my window, yet the moon was particularly bright tonight. I could see every detail of his strongly built face, structured jaw and stern irises.

He looked up at me for a second before turning his head down once again. This man was never one to back down from a fight, but today he seemed nervous. He seemed fragile in the way he averted his gaze and sat with his shoulders slumped forward unlike their straightly broad sort of way. Tobirama seemed distressed and worried; if only he would speak so that I could help him.

Still, I continued when he said nothing. “You said that you have a terrible pain in your chest? I asked if you were alright, and I’m not sure I fully believe you.”

“I can’t hide much from you, Y/N. I fear you know me too well.” He glanced up at me with a new goal in his eyes. I couldn’t understand what it meant, that gleam that suddenly appeared, but I knew it was far too important to interrupt. “We need to discuss what’s going on between us.”

And it was as if time has stopped. The fear that remained dormant in my chest was now pumping viciously through my veins. I felt my cheeks pale, running cold in a moment, and my hands start to clam up.

What was I supposed to say? How do you reply when someone wants to have a talk about your nonexistent intimate relations? My mind ran circles around all the excuses and pleas that I could use.

I whispered, broken at the edges, “I wasn’t aware there was anything between us.” Lies, of course. We both knew it.

“You’ve known for as long as I have-longer than that, I’m sure. You’re not an idiot, Y/N.”

“I don’t know what you want me to say,” I said, just as soft as before.

He leaned back, letting out a low exhale. His eyes rolled to the ceiling, as if he were raking through his mind for the right thing to say. He probably was. The Hokage never knew what to say in these sorts of situations. He was socially awkward, so oblivious at times that it hurt.

“I’m not sure what to say either. Just something. Anything to make this pain stop. It’s keeping me from my work, and it’s making me dependent on you.”

“You’re always thinking about me?”

“Yes, and it’s a problem.”

“I’m not sure what I could do to ease your troubles. I could never speak to you again, and you would be forced to forget me,” I suggested, although I would never do anything of the sort. It would leave me even more pathetic and incapacitated than I am now. I peered down at him, my eyes glimmering with the beginnings of tears, happy or sad, I wasn’t sure.. “But I’m not sure I could live like that for long, Tobirama.”

He shook his head. “I don’t want you to do that. I need you by my side. Haven’t I expressed that before?” So difficult, this stupid man. He wasn’t making any of this easier on me. “I don’t even know why I came here, especially at this time of night. I’m a fool for thinking this was something I could do.”

So fucking defeated. That’s the only way I can describe the sound of his voice as his coarse, frustrated words dripped from his lips out into the open. I took a deep breath, gulping down the terror I felt. I prayed he couldn’t see how terrified I was because I’m sure I looked pathetic. Nothing like a brave kunoichi, a veteran to the cause.

“Want me to tell you I love you?” I muttered in a voice so quiet I could have mistaken it for just another thought. And then, I held my breath.

He didn’t reply right away. He was silent, contemplative really. And I was at his mercy.

“Y/N, I-”

“It’s fine. You don’t need to say anything. Just know that I will always, unconditionally feel that way for you,” I confessed, suddenly not feeling as terrible. I knew he couldn’t just say something like that back. He wasn’t the type of man to just blurt out those intimate details on a whim. “You’ve been my best friend since you gave me those shuriken as a teenager, and I hope nothing brings us apart.”

“I hope for all the same things. I will protect you, if it’s the last thing that I do.”

“Tobirama…”

He tore down my soft voice with his own firm one. He glared up at me, snatching up my hands in his rough ones. He held them tightly to his chest, bringing the two of us only inches apart. “No, Y/N. No. Family is more important than anything, and after losing Hashirama- I don’t think I could handle life without you, too.”

He was so genuine in his words, and I had to bite my lip to keep from crying. Instead, I brought myself into his lap, climbing over top of him so my knees were on either side of his thighs. I kept our hands tightly clasped to my chest, but now I could feel the rise and fall of his breathing against me. I could see the specks of brown and gold in his crimson eyes. I could feel wisps of his white hair along my cheeks and forehead.

I pressed my face into his neck and sighed. This was as domestic as life would ever get, and it was the least I could do but to savour it with every one of my senses. To smell the musk on his skin, feel the warmth of his soul beneath me, listen to his harsh breaths. I absorbed every bit of this moment.

He released my hands so he could wrap his thick arms around my waist, tugging me to his abdomen. His nose found itself buried deep into my hair, soft sniffs taking in the scent of my shampoo. He always said I smelled like coconuts.

“Thank you.”

_____________________________

The day was long and terribly worrisome. Although I had busied myself with many tasks, nothing could stop the random tugs at my heart every time my mind shifted to my best friend who doubled as my strangely acquainted lover. I had waited for hours, on the couch at Tobirama’s house just for him to arrive home. I wanted to surprise him with a nice dinner and a few drinks of sake after completing the latest mission, one that seemed much harder than the last few. It was against the Kumogakure, who Konoha had been on the rocks with recently.

When one of Tobirama’s students, Uchiha Kagami stood in the doorway instead, I knew something terrible had happened. His deep black eyes stared over my shoulder so grimly, unable to meet my eyes. He was ashamed. I could feel it radiating from his form. I could feel many things from people, but this boy screamed pain, sorrow, and shame.

“What’s happened, Kagami-san?” I asked him calmly, even though I felt my stomach doing somersaults. “Where is Tobirama?”

“We were surrounded by Kinkaku’s Squad, and they had the upper hand. Lord Second, he…”

“Well?”

“I’m so sorry, Hatake-san,” he croaked, his voice finally cracking under the pressure. He looked into my eyes, the tears now rising up in the corners, sparkling in the candlelight illuminating the room. I shifted on my crutch, staring up at him with desperation in my eyes. I wanted him to say something else, anything other than the obvious. “He volunteered to act as a decoy so we could escape. I’m so sorry.”

My lips started to quiver. I couldn't come up with anything to really say. I could only muster out a pathetically miserable, “please no.” My knees suddenly felt very weak beneath me, and I was only really being held up by my crutch. My fingers tightly wrapped around the handle and squeezed so tightly it stung, and could have bruised.

But nothing mattered.

The tears that threatened to fall pooled up heavily in my eyes, and I hissed when the salty bits stung. “No. No. Please, God, no. Please don't.”

I pleaded and begged, my hand pressed to my mouth to muffle the cries. It was becoming harder and harder to breath. My head spun, dizzy and disoriented.

It felt like my entire life had been torn down in a single second. Every single thing I had ever built up was suddenly being crushed into the ground into thousands of irreparable pieces.

Tears streamed down my face thickly, hot and steady without signs of stopping. I didn’t know when I could stop crying. Nothing could have prepared me for the death of someone I loved more than life itself. Tobirama was the only person I had left in this damn world, and now I was alone. I was completely and utterly lost in this cruel world, crippled and sick and tired and heartbroken beyond fixing.

Kagami took a step forward and extended his arms, as if I needed to hug him. The only person I wanted to hold in my arms was Tobirama, and he was the one causing all this pain. It’s disturbing how misery works out that way. I shoved the boy back with all the strength my weak, broken soul could muster. He stumbled away from the threshold just enough for me to slam the door in his face.

Maybe that was rude and harsh and terribly uncalled for, but this death; fate didn’t need to torture me this way. To steal the one thing I held precious. Fate stole my legs from me, stole my mobility, stole my livelihood...and now it had forcibly taken the love of my life from my hands. The last thing that brought me any happiness.

I broke down on the floor right in front of the door, sliding down the wood frame and collapsing in a heap of shakes and quivers. I bent down so close that my forehead pressed to the hardwood, tears and slobber pooling on the ground beneath me. I grabbed at my hair and yanked it, trying to feel something other than this shockwave to my heart.

But nothing was going to help. The only thing I could do for now was scream and cry until I fell asleep, and even then, my dreams were not empty. They were plagued with him. Images of him constantly swirled in my mind. I woke up in cold sweats screaming or sobbing.

And I wasn’t the only one hurt by this. My ninkin couldn’t stand to see me this way. They knew me as a strong woman, one who could face death without flinching. Now, I was just a broken shell of the woman I used to be. I lost my father and mother, my brother Hashirama, and my best friend. It was only now that I was completely hollow to the core.

_________________________

“Hiruzen, did you get the final exam paperwork I dropped off earlier?” I asked, peeking my head into the Hokage's office where he sat over a stack of stark white papers. The man, one in which I watched grow into the great leader he was today, smiled and waved me into the room.

He peered over the sheet in his hand and hummed. “Impressive test results, Y/N. I have to say, you might be the most effective teacher at the academy.”

I nodded proudly, leaning on the wall to keep myself steady. I still had trouble keeping myself balanced at times, and I had pains shoot up my thighs randomly at times from the lasting impact the jinjuriki had on my muscles, but I no longer needed the crutch.

After Tobirama died, I left my position as Hokage's advisor. Instead I went to work at the academy where Tobirama dedicated much of his time and effort into creating. I didn't have to fight nor did I have to move around much on my feet. It was only simple stationary jutsu and chakra control, which I was still exceptional at.

Hiruzen was more than happy to have me help around. He was just glad I wasn't torn to shreds to the point where I could do nothing but stay inside.

“Thank you. That means a lot, really.”

“You're looking well? Is the medicine Tsunade made for you helping?”

“Yes! I swear that girl is miracle worker,” I laughed. The blond who grew up to be one of the most outstanding medical nin alive, produced a pain killer for me and it worked better than I'd ever dreamed. “I'm glad she picked up the medical practice. We really needed a good doctor in this village.”

“I heard you once tried to train with her?”

“Yeah. I figured it would be good to acquire another skill I could use without my full mobility. Turns out being a med nin is way harder than I thought,” I told him. “Props to Tsunade and the other nurses, honestly.”

Just as Hiruzen was about to say something else, the door behind me slid open and hurried little footsteps rushed into the room.

“Mom?” The soft, boyish voice rang out. “Kagami told me you were in here.”

I turned around, peering over at my 12 year old son, standing in the doorway shyly. He was a sweet boy, one of the kindest I'd ever met. It was the way I raised him, I suppose, and that made me proud.

He had dark eyes and gray hair that spiked in all directions. It was the natural way of the Hatake clan. He was tall, almost as tall as me even though he was just a child. He stood tall and proud, ready to impress. My son was a talented ninja, gifted even.

I worried he picked up some of my clumsiness or even my mediocre abilities, but it was quite the opposite. He was stunning much like his father. He moved with grace yet so much strength. He was reserved, but when he spoke it was never foolish.

“Sakumo, sweetheart, did you need something?”

“Yeah, actually. I wanted to know if I could go to dinner with Rei and Shikari?” He asked. I only nodded, rolling my eyes. He loved to spend his time with his friends, particularly a Nara and an Uchiha.

“Be back home before eleven, okay?”

He smiled triumphantly, even though I rarely told him no. He was such a good kid, I normally trusted him “Of course, Mom. Thanks.” My sweet boy ran from the room, waving to us on the way out.

I turned back to the Hokage sheepishly. “Sorry about that.”

“It's fine, Y/N. I actually enjoy seeing the child. It's like Lord Second is still with us in him.”

“Yeah. You're telling me.”

“He would have made a good father, I think.”

I laughed, rolling my eyes to the ground. I felt a pang in my chest. Yeah, I would have loved if Tobirama lived long enough to help me raise our son, to teach him all his talents and pass down the title of Hokage even.

“I think he would have been a disastrous father. Loving, yes, but he would have been so confused and lost. He never knew what to do with children.”

“Yes, but a father has a special connection with his own son, his own blood.”

“One day I know they will meet. And Tobi will be so proud of him.”

“I think he'll be proud of you the most, Y/N.” I hated when people told me stuff like that. When they mentioned how Tobirama and I used to be. When they made me fall in love with him all over again. I hated missing him every time they spoke in his memory.

I blinked back tears in my eyes and averted my gaze to the door. “That's more than enough, Hiruzen. Maybe we can talk about this some other time. Just not right now, yeah?”

“Of course. I hope you have a great rest of your day,” he nodded, wishing me the best of luck as I exited his classroom. And as I walked the empty hall, I swallowed my sorrow.

With time, I would see him again. The wait would always be worth it, as long as he remained in my heart. That's because Tobirama would always be unique. He was my first love and my last.

And that's the end! Did you like this kind of writing or hate it? Give me some feedback if you want and have a really nice day!

#naruto #naruto x reader #tobirama #tobirama x reader #one shot #writing #naruto shippuden #mine #with time #part three #thanks so much for reading till the end you guys #i love you

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