#only to realize i hadnt gotten ready for bed so i get up and do that bc i wont be able to sleep if i dont and then wake up and repeat till

[donniehere]

just found out that beomgyu’s a huge fan of headpats, so I decided to treat you with this short wholesome one-shot.

as this is my first post, please take notice that english isn’t my native language, so any corrections of grammatical errors or typos are appreciated.

HEADPATS

bf!beomgyu x f!reader

genre: fluff.

warnings: none!

description: when the usual hyperactive beomgyu returns upset from a concert, and won’t tell you what happened until he receives his headpats.

having a popular idol as your boyfriend wasn’t an easy task, especially in your position. having to deal with fans and the staff that hasn’t found out about your relationship. but beomgyu, being the supportive boyfriend he was, stood behind you through all of the path. whether it was dealing with rumours or throwing good words on your name infront of staff.

the only ones aware of your relationship, were beomgyu’s members, who supported you throughout the entire way and promised to keep your relationship a secret from the others. you truly did cherish them for doing so.

tours would always end up with you disappearing from yours and your co-workers’ hotel room in the middle of the night. and when they questioned you about it, you always excused you went out on a walk to catch a breath, when you were actually sleeping under beomgyu’s sheets.

just as described, you were currently awaiting your boyfriend’s return from the concert. he sent you a quick message informing you that they were on their way back to the hotel. you were sat on the expensive couch in his hotel room, jumping when you heard the door open. “gyu!” you exclaimed excitedly, jumping off the couch to greet the boy.

the moment you had a full sight of his face, you noticed the slumped pout on his lips. “hey.” his usual enthusiastic tone has changed upside-down, which only added to his bizarre behaviour.

the second your arms engulfed his body into a warm embrace, his weight leaned on to you, and his head found itself on your shoulder. “woah, what’s gotten into you?” you stumbled back due to his additional weight, your body barely capable of carrying his body.

you stood against the wall to prevent yourself from falling backwards. your hand briefly brushed against his head, fingers like feathers in his hair. “I’ll run you a warm bath, alright? get ready in the meanwhile.”

soon after, beomgyu joined you on the hotel bed, eyes glued onto your form. “well, mind telling me what’s the grumpy behaviour all about?” you question.

“no.” he shook his head and his honey eyes averted downwards.

you frowned. “gyuu, cmon, don’t be stubborn. you know im here to solve any of your problems.” you assure him. you wanted to make sure that he acknowledges your efforts in the relationship too. you wanted to confirm he knows you’re here.

beomgyu exhaled and shook his head in denial, or at least what you thought was denial. you slowly began to overthink your last days together with the male. have you done anything to upset him?

you raised your arm and slotted the palm of your hand against his squishy cheek, caressing it gently. “was it a brainless fan? or perhaps you believe you’ve failed a move?” you question.

“no. no.” he blabbered and shook his head once again.

your concern began mixing with disappointment. you mustn’t force it out of him, of course. but you believed he trusted you just as much as you trusted him. negative thoughts rushed to flood your mind.

is it because you hadn’t shown your face at the latest concert? is it because you hadnt been backstage? or perhaps it’s because you haven’t been showing the presence of an actual girlfriend.

you only know seemed to realize, you never attempted clearing out rumours about your relationship. it was always beomgyu. you felt your chest tightening with the sensation of salty tears begging to escape your eyes.

“beomgyu,” uneasiness was evident in your voice, proved by the calling of his full name, which you often used under serious circumstances. “have i done anything that dissatisfied you?” your voice stuttered.

you lowered your hand from his face, watching as his face scrunched at the lack of warmth. “beomgyu, please tell me, the both of us should try solving it—“

“are you oblivious?” beomgyu muttered in a barely audible voice. your eyes searched for his hidden orbs, curious to find out his intentions. his hand grasped your wrist and brought your hand up to his head, fingers brushing through his brown locks.

“huh?” you hummed, perplexed. “b-beomgyu, what is this supposed to mean?” your words have unwillingly stumbled, causing you to mentally curse yourself.

a breath you didn’t know you were holding escaped at the sight of beomgyu’s lips tugging upwards into a gummy smile. beomgyu began moving your hand with his, a pleasured expression was visible on his handsome features.

his head leaned closer until it limped onto your shoulder, his strands tickling your sensitive skin. even the noun confusion wasn’t enough to describe your emotions as your mouth was left agape.

somewhat enjoying the warmth his body emitted and the weight pressing onto your form, you chuckled lightly. “are headpats all you sought?” you asked him. he abandoned his grip on your hand, and you willingly continued to brush your fingers through his soft hair.

“kind of,” you heard a giggle escaping his wide-open lips, clearly satisfied by the sensation of your fingers’ feathery touch against his scalp. “well, there might be on more thing.”

by instinct, your posture straightened and the strength in your hand muscle was drained before you halted your movements, earning a whine from him. “gyu, don’t play with me.” you demanded.

you almost gave in to his teasings due to his adorable grin. he interlocked his fingers with you and lifted your hand, placing light kisses against your knuckles in an affectionate manner. was this his way of apologizing? you assumed so.

“fine, fine.” he chuckled. he once again, rested your hand on top of his hair and signaled you to stroke it. “but you know, I kind of missed you.”

——

the next morning, yeonjun came rushing into beomgyu’s hotel room, already planning to scold him due to causing the entire group to be late. but the moment he entered, his eyes landed on the sight of the both of you snuggled into eachother. a smile curled into his lips, and decided to let you rest for at least another couple minutes.

#fanfiction #txt #beomgyu #choi beomgyu #kpop #idol #beomgyu x reader #txt x reader #romance #fluff #head pats #soft romance #x reader #oneshots #boyfriend

[makriiii]

Caught VIII (Arthur Morgan × f!reader)

Word count: 3.5k

Authors notes: Double spaces...

Warnings: 18+, angst, cursing, gun violence, blood & gore.

Ao3 or wattpad!

@thatlittlered

♡

Caught VIII

A final wipe across the veneer on Charles' shotgun rendered it perfectly clean. The least you could do after borrowing it

After getting all that money just days ago you decided that perhaps it was a good time to get your own shotgun again after losing your last one somewhere up in the Grizzlies.

An extra pair of clothes too. Hard to do much with these worn and dirty clothes.

Washing them and having to get naked was out of the question after the creek. Your socks however had gotten a wash, entirely unwarranted, but they did. Courtesy of Arthur.

You shuddered at the thought of Arthur's body so close to you. Absolutely nothing covering him.

God. You shook the thought out of your head, jumping out of your seat to keep your mind on something other than Arthurs bare body.

Charles was sitting up against a tree, his eyes shut out the world. And you didn't want to startle him, or really bother him, so you simply laid his clean gun beside him and continued to your mount.

You hadnt spent any of the money you got two days ago, which would be more than enough to hook yourself up with a shirt that lacked a hole, and pants void of soot.

It'd been a day since you had seen Arthur. Not sure what activities he was off doing, you were just glad you weren't a part of it.

Your horse stood still for only as long as the time you took to bounce on, pulling away from the tie racks towards town once you got your seat.

Come to think of it, you really hadn't had much time to yourself throughout this entire ordeal.

Often, you'd be off on your own, avoiding most of the company that was brought through by Colms indifferent attitude toward any men who wanted to join.

You'd stick to a select few who you resonated with and had more of a long standing membership with, but those days had passed.

Looking down to the hole that grew in size each day on your dirty shirt, revealing your bandage more and more. You wondered just what clothes you'd find in Valentine. Those surface level thoughts growing deeper and deeper.

Was this really it? Just being handed off into a new gang, essentially, and continuing on your merry way? Certainly wasn't accounted for when you first got caught.

More so was constantly considering that man that somehow found himself in your mind every so often. Still baffled that you had let him sleep in a bed with you.

The money was worth it, you had to reason. Logical reasoning, as it was, was the only thing keeping you from thinking too much further on other things that you were certain to never name.

The longer you sat in your thoughts, the more you barely realized just how close you were to town, completely zoned out and not even consciously taking in your surroundings.

It wasn't until you heard a loud argument that you were finally yanked away from the thoughts in your head.

You looked to the cause of the voices that grew into shouting that you recognized someone from the bar.

The man with the bowler hat. Now you had a mighty fun time with him from what you could recall, and felt you should aid him in some way.

Dismounting and hitching, you strode over, hand laid over your revolver like a snake ready to coil itself around its prey.

You couldn't really tell what it was all about, but the man arguing with your pal took to shoving.

You laid your hand on your friend's shoulder, to get both his attention and the one he was bickering with.

"I hope I'm not too much a bother, but we drank together at the bar, and I figured I'd come over and say hello." You patted him with a warm smile, catching the other man off guard.

"Oh, yes." He didn't sound so sure at first, but when he examined your face further, he lit up. "Yes! I remember you. You'll never be too much a bother, I'm sure."

The other man was now silent and confused, staring daggers straight into you.

"You wouldn't mind if you showed me around town?" You could feel the angry man's eyes stare you down so hard you'd think he was trying to kill you with it.

Your friend looked more than delighted, likely mostly that you had stopped the fight.

"I can, I would not mind at all." He nods his head with an awkward laugh and turns around cautiously to the middle of town, making sure you're not far behind.

"Stop." The smile that had been on both your faces hardened into a more nervous glance. The man wasn't so quick to let you both off.

"I don't think you know me. But I know you." His words hit you like rocks, your stomach dropping like one too.

You turned around slowly to look him in the eye. Your hand ready to strangle your gun.

It wasn't an ideal place to have a shoot out, but when was any situation like this ideal?

The most sinister look waved over the man's face, his dark hat and trench coat adding to the shadow that already covered him.

"I think Colm'd love to see you, Miss. I don't forget faces so easy."

Your breath hitched, feeling your face go cold. You couldn't recall seeing this man from anywhere, and it hurt your head to think on it so hard.

Running through all the possibilities, you thought back to the time Arthur let all your ex-members run off.

You could feel your friend's confusion and uncomfortable demeanor as he shifted his weight nervously.

"I'm sorry, I don't know nobody named Colm. I think you got me mistaken." You turned away, but before you could fully walk off with your pal, your wrist was grabbed by somethin fierce.

You twisted back around, staring him straight down.

"Now you let her go." Your buddy demands, between the two of you, trying to push off the man's hold on you, though he wasn't much taller than you, in fact a bit shorter, and didn't seem to have much in terms of muscling the other, much younger man away.

He stumbles back with an angry scoff when he got another hearty shove.

"This isn't your business old man. Fuck off." He snarls, grabbing you tighter in response.

You hadn't come here to get manhandled again, Arthur was your tipping point. You had already had enough of Arthur.

With all the might you could muster into one leg, you landed it straight on his sensitive areas, kneeing his chest as he keeled over with a massive groan.

As soon as he was on the ground, you stood over him with your gun pointed lowly, almost shy with how you tried to hide it from other prying eyes.

"I want no trouble, you hear?" You crouched down next to the seeming O'Driscoll. A name you couldn't associate with yourself anymore.

He was quiet, staring up at you with eyes that burned like a swarm of angry hornets.

You pushed your gun into the underneath of his chin, a disgusted scowl forming on your face.

"There's law right around that corner there." It was less a threat and more a means to keep them off your tail instead.

He squirmed underneath the barrel of your gun. "I'd prefer to spare myself the dirty hands I'd get by killin you here."

This wasn't something youd normally do, but finally having control over your situation eased the anger you still held for Arthur and the way he had disrespected you for weeks.

The O'Driscoll nodded with much angst, his brows still held tightly together, and his hands around his neck to half shield himself.

You dug your gun in deep before you realesed the pressure and shooed him off with your foot.

"Jesus christ." Your friend drawls, rubbing the back of his head, his hat slightly riding up as he does. "I should thank you, I suppose, really."

Your smile returned once your ex gang member scurried off into town somewhere. You knew it was a mistake to let him go.

"Well, I couldn't go and watch the man who paid for my drinks get pushed around." You hook your arm around his, walking him into the main street with you. "What'd he want with you anyway?"

He shrugged, dismissing it as if it happened often. "He was tryna stick me up, but he already did earlier this week."

A sudden cough fires out of you, meant to be a laugh, but you didn't want to do that in front of this poor man.

"Really he did? Out in the middle of town?"

"Yeah. I think they visit town quite often. Doing something, not sure what."

This piqued your interest. Certainly. More O'Driscolls in town, and none the less the ones who saw your face at Six point cabin.

If his words were true - that meant there's many more of them somewhere here. And suddenly, you felt the weight of the world on you. You didn't want to be here anymore.

"Well, what's your name?" He questioned, looking over to you, pulling you out of your thoughts once again, you hadn't even realized you didn't reply to him.

"Y/n L/n." You met his eye expectantly in return.

"It's nice to finally get your name Miss L/n." His hand pats yours kindly. "You can just call me David."

You returned formalities and continued walking slowly with him. He commented on the ever growing hole in your shirt sleeve, which prompted you to tell him the vibrant story of what predicament you found yourself in, and your quest for clothes.

He nodded his head along with your story, glancing around every so often on the lookout for more malicious men.

Once you finished the rundown, he offered to help you, as there wasn't really a place to get clothes here in town.

"I still have clothes at my cabin not far from here, my late wifes' clothing." You could hear the small strain in his voice when he mentioned her, which made you assume she had passed.

"Oh no, you don't have to do anything for me, David. Honest." You did your best to comfort him without bringing any of it up.

He shakes his head, releasing his arm from yours to gather his horse.

"I insist, you saved me. Plus, I have no need for clothes like that, seeing as I don't wear them." The initial glum in his voice disappeared as fast as it came, playing it off with a joke.

You felt bad, but felt bad if you didnt accept.

You mounted your horse not far from him and followed him to his cabin.

The ride lead down a forested path, the breeze whistled through the trees, and chatter from birds calmed your nerves from the O'Driscoll encounter.

All along the way with David, you conversed with him, though this time, actual talking, rather than some drunken slew you both spat out.

-

You were half way out of town now, having ran by the gunsmith for a new shotgun that now laid on your back with clean clothes.

David had told you about his wife, and how you reminded him of her. It was an hour or so you had spent engaging in conversation with him.

The worry of O'Driscolls and Arthurs nagging hadn't crossed your mind the entire time, which left you feeling more even.

He left you with a few different sets of clothes, all that fit you well.

While he gathered them for you, he told you the story of just why he could give you these clothes. You could tell how much he loved her and it broke your heart to hear how she lost her life while out hunting a bounty.

You had left a stark 50$ on his table before you left, knowing he wouldn't have accepted it otherwise. It was a large sum, but he was more than deserving.

As your horse made it further back to camp, the shadows around you grew as the sun's light dimmed behind the horizon.

Which made it more difficult to see who was walking on the side of the road up ahead. You squinted your eyes when you swore you recognized the man.

He turned his head toward the horse and rider approaching him from behind.

That face. Just as clear as the day you first saw him in the mountains. But why on earth was he here and without a horse?

"Arthur?" You kicked your horse into a small trot before you slowed her when you caught up to him. "Why are you walking?"

You could already tell he wasn't in a good mood, his huffing made that clear.

"Horse ran off." He replied shortly, entirely flat.

"Horse ran off." You repeated without hesitation in a mocking snicker, slapping your knee to add to his disdain.

"Shut your mouth, y/n. You always pick the worst times to play your bullshit."

"Oh boy. You're laughable, Arthur." Tears pricked your eyes at the thought of him falling off his horse. The man, as big and tough he liked to be, still fell.

He grumbled something under his breath. His stomping became more apparent with your teasing.

"Get outta here." He tries shooing your horse away with his hands and the clicking of his tongue, but to no avail. She hardly acknowledged it. "Have you got nothing better to do?"

"I just got done with everything I needed to do. The next is making your life more difficult." You snide, relaxing back on your horse to make it apparent that you weren't going to buzz off just yet.

"Right, then you can take me to my horse." Without warning, he jumps on the back of yours, his grimy hands at the sides of your waist.

You slap them away from you and give him a harsh stare from him right behind you.

"I didn't say shit for yes?" You growl, about ready to shove him off. "Now off with you. I don't ferry people around."

His face remained indifferent, not budging an inch from behind you.

"Before dark would be preferable." He returns, completely ignoring your demand.

"Okay, well I suppose I shall just guess what direction your damn horse went?" You snap at him, your playful attitude dissipating in place of irritation.

He points across, slightly in the way you already came, over, and across a hill.

You ask for a trot back in that direction, your mare not too all happy at Arthurs joining on her back. You couldn't agree more with her attitude.

"How'd you fall off?" You question before you hit a steep incline and his hands clamped back down on your sides to keep him from sliding off.

Your brows knit together, but you had done the same with him and didn't feel like fighting him more.

"Raiders popped out the bushes." He remained vague, a small red over his cheeks if you could see right with the every few glances you sent his way.

"That it?" You chuckle in disbelief. He was the only one you could pry like this without feeling annoying. Well, you felt annoying but that was entirely the point for him.

He stays silent for a moment. His discontent so strong you swore the town could feel it from here.

"How'd you get these clothes?" He questions, ignoring you again. Clearly there had to be more that he kept from you.

You hummed as you capped the hill Arthur directed you over, a deep and rich red sun half blinds you, before you adjust and see the colours of the sunset growing into different shades of orange and pink.

"From a friend." You finally respond, having been mesmerized by the day being pushed away by the moon and the stars behind you.

The trail was calm, and as you looked down, you saw a set of fresh hoofprints. Though if from Arthur's horse, you couldn't be sure, but it was worth a ways to walk.

From where the sun set, you had to turn your head all the way over, so you took out your feet from the stirrups and sat sideways on the saddle.

Arthur slid his hands off you as did this, eyeing you with confusion.

You cocked your head to meet his eye. His face graced by the soft colours of the sunset, his eyes reflecting them back. He had a bit of dirt smudged on it, no doubt from his fall, but that didn't change how it looked in the light.

His face just seconds ago had been tense with irritation, now his lips gave way to a soft, albeit, lofty smile.

"What'd I do to earn that look from you?" He quips, his grin splitting his cheeks when you coil back, an eyebrow extending upwards.

Perhaps you hadn't noticed just how long your eyes searched his face. Your lips pursed together, fixing your gaze back on the sunset.

"Letting your imagination run off with you is tricky business, Arthur." You shook your head, wishing to simply just move on from it.

"Oh I know." A feigned look of agreement on his face. "Although, I saw that with my own two eyes, not with my imagination."

"Saw what?" You groan, wondering if he even had a definition for it.

"The way you looked at me."

You hiss air out of your teeth, rolling your eyes at him. "I would trust only a doctor to diagnose me with Stockholm syndrome."

Now you earned a hearty chuckle from him, which made you wanna push him off and just leave him even further from camp.

"Don't think it'd be that if I already let you go."

He simply wouldn't let it go. You were naive to think he would in the first place.

"I can assure you, your face isn't something most want to look at. You just have dirt all over it." You grip at your saddles horn with bitterness, trying to ward off the warmth you felt on your cheeks.

"Keep your eyes lookin for your animal. Before I have you fallin off this horse too." You added a threat to your insult before he could refute any of it.

"Alright, alright." He conceded, finally stopping with the snickering, but his smile that always had you vexed remained.

"You know, I heard there's some O'Driscolls in town. Maybe holed up somewhere." You tried changing the subject, and it worked. His eyes meeting yours with a more serious look.

"They want you that bad huh?" His voice was full of insinuation, which had you sighing with more aggravation.

"It's not because I'm whatever it is you call it - special girl- that bullshit." You wave your hand in front of his face to get him to stop before he started.

BAM!

Your retelling was cut short when a gunshot rang the air around you both, your horse jerking underneath you out of shock.

Arthur was quick to duck down and cover you, his face estranged from the previous joy he had on it.

You kicked your leg back over your saddle and made for a quick lope, Arthur all the while grasping for his shotgun at his back.

"Think those are the O'Driscolls you mentioned." He clamors and with the click of his shotgun, sent off a blast at the three that tailed you.

You hissed out a curse under your breath, dropping the reins around your saddles horn whilst you grabbed for your gun as well.

Shouts and yelling came from the men, and another that you had already regrettably let live.

A shot whizzed right by your face, your blood running cold just from the spot it had grazed you.

"Preferably alive, fools!" He screeches at the one who was already in for Arthurs bullet.

You shoot again, but an unexpected turn from your horse made you miss the men.

You glanced back ahead, a horse who was alarmed at the sudden commotion was up ahead, standing innocently.

By the time you looked back, there were another few men who had gained on you. Replenishing the ones Arthur took out already.

"Goddamnit." He reloads once more. "Hard to aim from back here."

"Well, fret not." You assure with a shout over the yelling from behind you. "I hope you can get on a horse fast."

You were still a ways away, not made any better when the thing started running off in front of you.

Now the ones being pursued, were also pursuing. God, you weren't sure this was going to go well for you.

Another blast rings out, a warmth covering your arm, yet you couldn't tell if it was just Arthurs arm making contact with yours or not.

You looked over for confirmation, but instead met by splattered blood. You nearly felt you had gotten shot again, but Arthurs grunts of pain met your ear instead of your own.

#arthur morgan #red dead redemption arthur #red dead redemption two #arthur morgan x reader #arthur morgan x you #rdr2 #rdr2 fanfic #red dead fanfic #enemies to lovers #lemon fanfic #arthur morgan x female reader #arthur morgan fanfiction

[spikeinthepunch]

i finished Lisa the painful *again* to get the secret in Definitive edition and now i want to ramble about that, and also the other realizations i had on my second playthrough (spoilers ofc. do note again i havent gotten to Joyful). get ready for an essay

TW for physical and sexual abuse

soooooooooo

this second play was good because there was a lot i hadnt yet connected about the story with Brad, and it hit like a fucking truck when i realized.

For one, I hadnt really understood what Brad's "second chance" actually was. It took me a minute to actually realize Dusty was Rando, and with Dusty's limited appearances I didn't completely recognize him in flashbacks. I did know it was him at the end but the information on him is very very scarce and only now did I realize what happened. And how (as i assume based on the information and my assumptions) Brad's second chance is about Dusty instead, and being a better father to Buddy instead.

Because when I saw that flashback of Dusty apologizing, backed into a corner with a bloody injured face..... and then even thinking back to Brad's convo w Queen in the new campfire stuff- about reprimanding Dusty and Buddy for hugs..... it had me connect the change in behavior. Much like Brad turning tough as a defense, and Dusty learning that too esp with how weak he was. I have to imagine while Brad hasn't been physical against Buddy, he still carries that strict and detached role. I don't know for sure if anything is implied as to what Dusty did later in life- if he ran away or something. But oof! ouch! that fucking slapped me when i connected the dots. and feel free to correct me but also, no spoils on Joyful lol.

And then I get to the secret boss added in Definitive (go sleep at the first campfire after getting 4 boat parts).

boy that was something. like, an hour of my time and lots of suffering. I was playing Painless so it wasnt nearly as awful. but god damn. there is such a strong theme of "you cant escape your abusers. you will become them" through the game, and there is desperation from Brad to not be that. But he hold on to so much guilt and so much anger, he is trapped in a cycle of never getting away from it. Marty lives inside him, like some part of him, that he cant get rid of. actually similar to how Lisa in The First sees her mother inside herself that turns into Marty, showing how he has infected all of her memories and mind-- Marty's influence grips Brad so hard still that parts of him reflect Marty's which in turn keeps the roots deep inside.

theres something also so fucking painful with how Marty is displayed. Honest to god havent seen a story like this ever display such a horrible disgusting character so blatantly... so up front... as a huge focus of the characters' arcs. Every step and every piece of dialog had my flight or fight instinct on high. Definitely more triggering as a abuse survivor but-- jesus I felt like I was constantly on alert, fearing for the worst, trying to read Marty's intents as if to make sure I could tell something worse was going to happen. I could just feel it in my gut and i wanted to leave even when i stayed to keep listening to what he had to say. even something about marty patting the bed beside him and telling Brad to sit down with him got my chest tight.

everything Marty says through the fight makes it harder and harder to bear. While I got stressed every time my dude's died, I kind of also wanted to see more of what he'd say out of curiosity lol... It is so strikingly manipulative. the way Brad's relationship all comes from the idea of masculinity and bloodline and how thats just the way it is... thats the worst part. you could probably assume this is what happened to brad's dad with his dad, and so on. not to put any pity on Marty- just the fact that such things run so hard and so deep, and the fact that Marty pressures it on Brad with implications that he weak or not a real man or a disappointment. after a while none of that even mattered to Brad, he didn't like his father and he couldn't stand it. and yet those people, those abusers, hold power because theyve always told you how you're below them.

it hurts so fucking bad esp after i made my above connection with Dusty. i think its wildly interesting to have a character like Brad. i know i could say a lot about "imperfect" or kinda shitty characters as main characters after playing Disco Elysium, and while DE is a fantastic game (my all time fave) oghhh boy if we need a shitty guy then we definitely need Brad. and like, its still not shitty in an irredeemable way, but like the main of DE. orrr at least, its shitty in a way that you feel like they are trying. theyre truing....something. they trying. maybe for the wrong reason? and theyre fucking up when they dont even know it.

Brad's drive in Painful goes from "father figure wanting to protect his child in a world that wishes to hard her, abuse her, and use her." to "father figure finding a way to atone for his past abusive behavior, by caring for a new child despite being unable to let go of the grip that trauma left on him, thus still repeating the cycle of abuse in ways he doesnt understand".

augh. okay. idk where i am going with this now. but i think that secret boss added a lot and i think it was a good addition (even if they sure love making you climb long ass ropes). I also found it interesting there are two scenarios we know abt brad messing around and putting on makeup. With Lisa he apparently just wanted to get into mom's stuff. and i can imagine with Buddy he willingly did it for her to have fun. like. not saying transfem Brad but. you know. i think thats cute.

but this new thing reminded me much of the surreal stuff in The First and i think that was great bc Painful doesnt have too much about Marty and Brad's relationship outside of the beginning and end. and I dont think its needed-- the game can be played fine without it (and many will likely not see it bc its not stated how to get this boss). but The First had some p interesting visualizations about the abuse and i think its very effective. it makes it more scary. it makes it hit harder. the imagery associated with Marty strikes me harder when I played the First after Painful and saw those Marty spiders in the first game. And then seeing the bile. and the vomiting. and the slimy disgusting way he talks--

sorry, i imagine this whole game's story and this dream is probably super triggering for others too, and it hits a different way. i think its easier to attach to this game due to it. and i definitely wont stop my praise for it-- its hard to recommend but, seriously genuinely cant think of any media thats done it like this and i really enjoy every moment.

#yeahg i am tagging this idk might as well throw my rambles into the tags #i wrote this at 2am after i beat the boss btw #lisa rpg #lisa the painful #lisa

[im-not-a-simp-i-swear]

"PLEASE JUST GO TO BED.."

Scenario: lucifer gets sick but refuses to rest because of all the work he has to do

(Im sick as of writing this but just like the scenario, i have work to do..)

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Today was a long day for everybody in the devildom, infact it was long enough to lead to almost everyone going to sleep was nightime arrived, everyone except one stubborn busy demon.

The avatar of pride could not go to sleep now, he had alot of paperwork to finish for tommorrow for Diavolo, he had been working all day and only got to eat some food thanks to you bringing it over to him. Even then Lucifer didnt bother taking breaks, he'd only get up from his office for some coffee.

As he checked every paper and did his job he noticed his eyes feeling itchy and his throat feeling scratchy. Not much was thought about this since he hadnt really been paying attention to his needs today. He took a sip of his coffee and didnt think much of it, but then the itchiness came back and he was having a hard time breathing properly. A cough came out of nowhere and it was then that the demon realized what was about to happen. He couldnt get sick tommorrow.

Seeing as he was almost done however (and as the household was completely quite) he decided to call it a day and go to bed. It was only a couple of pages that needed some signing left so he decided to do so tommorrow before handing it over to the prince tommorrow.

He got up and head to his room, but not before drinking some water and taking a pill to help out. "I'll be fine tommorrow" he thought, plus even if he ended up sick he would still be able to work, its not like he has ever gotten bad enough to die hahaha...

.

.

.

A few voices came from the hallways that were loud enough to wake up the eldest. Lucifer opened his eyes but they quickly closed afterwards. He then felt like his whole body was being dragged back to bed as he attempted to get up. Did he stayed up that late? But he still manages to wake up early anyways.

Then it came, a noise he did NOT wish to hear.. a cough. In fact the cough was bad enough to leave his throat aching, to make matters worse he felt his nose runny and a headache bad enough to kill a man.

By pure magic he finally got up and went to get ready for today, still the hot shower and light breakfast didnt help him at all. His entire body felt like it was cooking and he really just couldnt stay standing for long enough. His brothers and even you could tell something was off, but when asked if he was alright he would put on his mask and answer yes.

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.

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In the council room Lucifer was finishing his work, it was just a few pages left anyways. Problem was it felt like there was more work than he remembered... maybe he didnt count correctly last night? No no no he did find the exact same amount of yesterday's work missing to be finished. He took a heavy breath as he felt again so tired and he rubbed his eyes to stay open and to stop the aching. He cant be sick right now, there is so much to do today! If he didnt do it then who would??

.

.

.

Class felt even longer than finishing that work. He ended up scibbling onto the missing paperwork just so he could make it to class in time. His head was still pounding, and his body felt like it was going to shut off at any moment now. He could barely understand what the teacher was saying without hearing an annoying echo in the background. He had tried to drink some water before class but he couldnt do so in time, he drink some now but his body was aching hard enough for him to not wanna move.

You and Mammon just so happened to be in the same class at that moment and you could tell that something was wrong. Mammon did so too, and while he was convinced that lucifer would just give you two the same answer as this morning, you two still decided to ask him after class if he was ok again.

You saw him leaving down the left hallway so you called him out. He didnt turn arounf however.. you tried again with the same result. Third time was fortunately the charm, however he didnt seem happy to see you two.

"You sure you're good?" Asked Mammon standing behind you. "Yeah you seemed pretty distracted during class today" you add to his question.

"I said im.. fine" he took a moment to finish his response, his headache was only getting more and more worse. You placed a hand on his shoulder and asked if he was sure, "its ok if you dont feel well, Diavolo's event is later today anyways and there is enough time for you to at least take a nap".

"No, really im great," he said still avoiding eye contact with you two. This wasnt the lucifer you knew so you decided to lift his face and confirm his words. His eyes had heavier bags than usual and his looked awfully pale, yes more than he usually gets, the only parts of his face that wasnt snow white was his nose and cheeks, which were very red. "Lucifer you're burning" you tell him as you feel his forehead with your backpalm.

Mammon continued to stand behind you but was now more concerned than before. "MC im fine" lucifer tells to you again, his voice sounding more affirmative than before. Still Lucifer was your friend (probably more depending who is reading this), and you couldnt bear to see him try to work to death.

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The event Diavolo had been planning all week was just about to start, the prince seemed really excited as well as some of the brothers. Before officially starting however the prince wished to check on everyone one last time. He had to make sure you were all prepared. "Beel, belphie, do you two have everything ready?" He starts checking. The twins nodded. "Satan, MC, Asmo?" You and the forth born nodded as well. "Mammon, levi?" They responded with a yes. "Luc...ifer? Are you alright? You seem.. tired" asks the prince as he sees his right hand man starring at the horizon, at this poitn everyone could tell he wasnt well. He just nodded as a response as well.

"Lucifer you do have to participate if youre feeling bad, its ok" says Simeon as he leans slightly forward, with the younger angel behind him. Lucifer doesnt respond this time, instead his breathing becomes unsteady again and he proceeds to lose his balance. Its a good thing that you were next to him or else he wouldnt plopped to the floor. He tries to say something bad he felt so ass he couldnt anymore.

As he passes out everyone starts to panic. You could only carry him in your arms for so long before Mammon and Beel walked up to help you lay him down. You sat next to his head to hold it correctly so when he wakes it his neck doesnt feel sore. Simeon and Solomon also walked up to see what to do. Diavolo however would end up being the one to come up with a plan on what to do.

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Everything seemed blurry as Lucifer finally opens his eyes again. He still didnt feel any better but at least he was in his room again. "Wha... where.. what happened?" He asks to himself. You walk in however with a wet warm towel and answered his question. "You passed out Luci, you seem to have caught a nasty fevet" you tell him.

You place your hands on his shoudler and order him to lay down so you can place the towel on his head. You have to use the pact between you two so he can actually get better becuase (knowing him) he would just get up again and try to get back to work. "What about the.." he tries to ask but you interupt him, "the others have it undercontrol, but it will end early so your brothers can help out". Its funny how you manage to respond his questions without him even finishing them, but it is very frustrating to have to use your pact so he can rest. Lucifer just refuses to stay in bed doing nothing, he has work to do.

"Lucifer-"

"MC i cant stay here i'm very busy today"

"But Diavolo ended up giving you the rest of thr week off until you get better"

"Im already feeling amazing, thanks for the help but-" just then he feels his body give up on him again and he falls to the floor.

"I.." you sigh before activating the pact again, "lucifer please just go to bed.." you tell him.

With that you manage to get him back to bed and you decide to keep an eye on him the remaining of today. There are moments when he tries to get up and leave but you manage to catch him just in time. You also make sure he eats well and takes his medecine so he can get better. Once nightime arrives again the others arrive and decide to give you a hand as well.

Thanks to teamwork and ALOT of patience with the eldest Lucifer finally gets better. It did took the rest of the week for him to get better but whats important is that the avatar of pride isnt sick anymore, and he even thanks you and the rest of the gang for helping him :)

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Sorry if this is messy but i really do feel like trash right now so i wrote this mess, depending on this post i might to a sequel or write another fic where the brothers dont have MC to help out, it would be a fun crack fic :)

#obey me #obey me asmodeus #obey me beelzebub #obey me leviathan #obey me lucifer #obey me satan #obey mammon #obey me belphegor #obey me headcanons #obey me mc #obey me diavolo #obey me barbatos #obey me simeon #obey me solomon #obey me luke #obey me fluff #obey me crack #??? maybe #obswd #obey me shall we date

[princeanxious]

I woke up at 4 am this morning to waiat in a line, i had maybe a half an hour nap when i got back before i took my meds bc i couldn’t fall back asleep, it is my only day off, and i have been sitting here drawing dukeceit doodles for the past four hours instead of finishing my dinner and going to do the dishes and also my laundry, because i have work tomorrow, and no clean pants to wear,

And it is. 12:35am.

Have i moved yet? No.

Do i plan to? Yes!

Do i know when the fuck that’ll be because it means i gotta do chores and then get ready for bed? No, nadda fucking clue tbh. I could be awake for another three hours staring at fuck all and still get nothing done if i felt like it(and, most times, even when i *do* want to get stuff done)

I’d ask why/how my life has come to this but I’ve learned damn well to stop asking questions i dont have the energy to answer myself

#luka rants #i feel like i am an embodiment of exhaustion rn. like. i already felt that way before today bc my body sucks & so does work #but i’m also pretty sure i’m taking a slow but rapidly steepening dip in physical health and resultingly mental health as well #i sway when i sit or stand and i already have shit balance. i’m always so fucking exhausted but i dont really have the resources to take- #-more than one day off atm w/o getting closer to trouble than i’d like w/ marks against my job #so i have to save it for like. important shit #it takes a month to get enough hours to take off 1 full shift and woo boy every day i feel i’m that much closer to actually like #tripping and either busting my head open or spraining/breaking a bone from my body’s sheer lack of energy regeneration it seems #its been like. a back to back wake up get ready for work go to work come home do chores hopefully finish eating then collapse till 4 am #only to realize i hadnt gotten ready for bed so i get up and do that bc i wont be able to sleep if i dont and then wake up and repeat till #my next day off over which i literally collapse and have no ability to do anything and usually dont even get peace in resting bc #i’m expected to just. treat it like a day off and be open to going out or doing something or be sighed at because i’m too exhausted #to even fucking exist and am expected to be exciteable and sociable like i used to be but i literally do not have a sense of self anymore #i dont have the energy to do anything fun outside of sometimes drawing. not even talking about stuff i like. #it’s borderline insane to just be able to reflect on how exhausted i am and not knowing how to deal or ask for more help. and so my current #help thinks i’m just being a little lazy and god how terrible am i to just let that stand bc i feel like its true. even as i sit here and #ridicule myself for not being able to do basic shit like standing up and putting dishes away or cleaning my clothes or fucking. smiling! #i dont have the energy to ‘prefer’ anything bc all of it is just focused on surviving the next hour #the next day. the next week #‘what do you want to do with your life for/after college’ is so hilariously depressing to be asked because?? #i dont. know #i’ll be happy to make it to next week without accidentally offing myself at work to make enough to pay off the stupid medical bill #for another stupid issue in my body that should not be so severe but is anyway #maybe i dont want to go to fucking college or be expected to hone in on some future specialized career just to live life #maybe i’m not actually fucking capable of answering that question bc it seems my body is trying to off me at literally every chance it gets #god im so fucking tired

[violetnotez]

HC: The Boys Taste Their S/o’s Chapstick

Anonymous:  could I request headcannons for shinso, mirio, denki, sero, and bakugo kissing their s/o and tasting their chapstick ? Or if you want or when they realize their s/o takes care of them in really subtle ways that they didn’t really notice it at first ? i love your blog so much 🥺❤️

Hey babe omg Im so happy you like my blog!!!! Also this ask OMG I have been wanting to write it for so long!!!! Im a sucker for these super cute and fluffy headcanons, so thank you so much for the idea!

Pairings: Shinso x reader, Mirio x reader, Denki x reader, Sero x reader, Bakugo x reader

Warnings: some might get suggestive, but none of these are full blown NSFW! Just a sprinkle of spiciness, thats all!

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ ｡･:*:･ﾟ

S H I N SO U

Flavor: Cherry Vanilla

Your currently trying to get ready for bed with Shinsou, his purple hair cascading against the pillow as he’s scrolling through Insta

defintely looking at cat vids

Youre just BEAT from the day- work, school, practice, whatever your life entails it just felt so incredibly tiring today

Of course, Shinsou seems to have other plans

Once he sees you come out of the bathroom, your hair wet, your skin dewy from washing, your body only wearing one of his oversized shirts and some small shorts....

man is gonna wanna be allllll over you

“Damn, kitten who allowed you to look that hot,” he’d purr, his eyes drinking you in as he propped his body on his elbows to get a better look

You’d roll your eyes, a smile on your lips-

Lowkey a perv for his s/o fight me on this

Once you sit down on the bed, its over

Shinso’s hands are all over you, his palms trailing under your shirt as he leaved lazy kisses on your neck

“Cmon, baby, lets have a little fun before we sleep....”

Just tell him your tired, and he’ll comply, turning super fluffy and cuddly in a matter of minutes

Reluctantly tho this boi is horny when hes horny

“Ahh my kitten’s tired? Fine then, you need your rest.”

He’ll lean in to give a sweet kiss, unknowingly of how flavorful you taste now with your chapstick

And OHOHOHO after that its OVER

The taste of vanilla bursts in his mouth, the scent of cherry becoming more prominent-

When did you start tasting so good?

He honestly wont know how to react- he’ll shake his head and blink a few times, “The hell-?” spilling out of his lips

He grabs you buy the chin, his thumb swiping against your lips gently

Once he sees the faint red sheen on his digit, it kinda dawns on him whats going on

You catch on to his confusion, a small giggle spilling out of you as you tell him its just chapstick you bought since your lips felt dry

He’ll just give you a lazy smirk, his lilac eyes a royal purple as he eyes you

This man cant HELP HIMSELF

He’ll lean in for another kiss, this one lasting much longer and more passionate as he tried to capture that taste again

“Do me a favor and keep wearing that kitten,”

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M I R I O 

Flavor: Birthday Cake

Im so proud of fidning this picture im sorry it just matches so well

Anywaysssssssss

You had just gotten out of the locker room, your UA uniform a little wrinkled from being balled up while you were training

You walked out the metal doors, your lips feeling much softer than usual- you were in desperate need of chapstick after that particular lesson

Thanks UA for having training grounds that blow up every 5 seconds and spray dust everywhere

But thankfully Neijire is the best person ever and hooked you up with some super cute chapstick

Since it was new and just sitting in her book bag, she just told you to keep it

NEIJIRE WHY YOU GOTTA BE SO SWEET?

You had to admit though, you really liked it- the packaging was pretty cute, it was nice on your skin, but the SMELL

OMG

You felt like a bakery was near you every step you took

And everytime you licked your lips it tasted like sweets, which was an amazing addition

Makes ya wonder how safe it is to consume makeup ���

Mirio is the cutest boyfirend though-wherever your class is, he waits for you outside and walks with you until you have to go your seperate ways

So, as usual, he’s waiting for you outside the locker room, a wide grin plastered on his face

Once he sees you walk out of the doors, he’s already bounding over, his arms swinging cause hes always just so happy to see you 

“Hey sunshine!” he greets you like any other day, his voice just radiating happiness

Some days though, Mirio will kiss the top of your head as he grabs your hand and walks you to his class

Other days, he’s a little more bold, instead leaning down to give you a kiss on your lips as he snakes his hand around your waist

TODAY BABE 

IS THAT DAY

You can tell he’s feeling a little more *frisky cause he’s got this mischievous glint in his eyes

ehhhh why not indulge him?

So you get on your tippie toes, leaning in to him and planting a quick kiss on his lips

But thats when Mirio gets confused- did you eat something?Is it cake? CInnamon roll? Cookie? But whatever it is, it tastes GOOD

“Sweetie, did you buy something from the vending machine?” he asks, a confused grin on his face as he eyes you

You laugh, not realizing that Mirio would be affected by your new chapstick too, 

“Oh no, its just a chapstick Niejire gave me, I think its cake batter flavored- do you like it?”

Mirio licked his lips , savoring the lingering flavor on his skin

“You batter belive it!”

*cue the groaning

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D E N K I

Flavor: Pina Colada

So Mina, bless her little music crazed heart, somehow won a pack of tickets from a radio station to a new water park opening up not too far from UA

It was superrrrr expensive to get in, but the music station hooked all you guys up with VIP tickers, a private cabana, food, THE WORKS

You had been running around with the group all day

(except Bakugo- he either went to the lazy river or the surfing simulator thignie cause Kaminari said he would wipe out and wanted to prove him wrong)

Everybody else wanted to do everythingggg, from ride the craziest rides to trying all the food the park had

By the end of the day, you were completely beat and just wanted to rest

Mina was sitting beside you in  the cabana (again, thank you radio station for hooking some teens up!), just searching it for snacks the boys hadnt eaten

“Aww cmon, really?! We have chapstick but no food?!”

Your head instantly perked up at the sound- chapstick? God, you could deifnitely use some right now from all that chlorine and sun...

You asked Mina to toss you one, the pink skinned girl throwing you a tube as she grumbled about how “piggy” boys were

You checked the flavor on the tube, the fruits on the side label instantly telling you it was something tropical

As you were putting it on, the boys of Bakusquad were bounding up the steps, their feets covered in sand-

“Guess what?! We got Bakugo to go in the wave pool! Isnt that crazy! It had sand on the bottom, like a real beach-”

Kirishima was just gushing and super excited, Bakugo looking like a pissed off wet cat next to him

You sat up quickly, happy to see your boyfriend, his spiky hair all wet from the day and his boxers dripping

As Kirishima and Sero were messing with an extremely annoyed Bakugo, you went and grabbed the boys some towels, giving the last one to your boyfriend

“Aww thanks babe,” he gushed out, his hands grabbing the towel gingerly as he leaned to kiss you

But wait- you tasted- really sweet?

Kaminari pulled back slightly, a small smirk on his lips, cause damn, that tasted really good

“Did you eat some fruit or something? Cause you taste super yummy babe-”

You  pointed to your lips as you told him how Mina found some free chapstick lying around in the cabana

Kaminari just gave you this really blissed out stare as he sneaked one more peck from you- he was kinda wishing his friends weren't here, cause hed totally be making out with you with that yummy stuff on your lips...

“Do me a favor and dont take that stuff off, okay? Until we get back to the dorms,”

He sent you a small wink, weaving behind you inconspicously, and giving your bottom a playful pinch

WHY YOU GOTTA BE A FLIRT KAMINARI

(Also before you left Kamianri most definitely dumped the whole jar of chapsticks into his backpack)

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆ 

S E R O

Flavor: Peppermint

You and Sero had just gotten coffee from a little cafe when it starts to rain

Like alottttttttttt

And of course it happens when your right outside, waiting for your ride to take you back home

So you two are just standing there like weirdos with the rain POURING, Sero holding up his jacket over both of your heads

But honestly, it’s not doing much to block out the rain, so honestly-why not have some fun?

You run out of the fabric, instantly feeling your whole body get drenched as you start twirling and laughing

“He-hey wait, babe!”

Sero’s gonna be laughing, and now y’all playing a wierd game of tag

Aghhhhhh so cute tho 🥺🥺

He catches you pretty quickly, his tape grabbing your waist and pulling you to him,,,

You instantly collide with his chest, your cheeks rosy from running around so much and your hands resting on his chest

Sero gives you the biggest grin, his finger under your chin and raising it to look at him

“You know your the biggest tease I know?”

“Yup!”

He laughs, placing a kiss on your lips-and omg why are you minty? and it feels soooo good to him, cause honestly mint isn’t a bad flavor-

“Hey babe whatcha got on your lips? Did you eat-gum or something?”

You just laugh and tell him it’s some chapstick you got (imagine the mint eos U KNOW THE ONE)

He asks if it’s the egg chapstick OML 💀

Yes Sero the egg chapstick

His lips are parted a little, his eyes wider than usual cause he’s lowkey confused on how he liked that so much

But he send you another huge grin before he kisses you again-

“I think your gonna need to wear that more for me, yeah?”

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

B A K U G O

Flavor: Cinnamon

Bakugo has ben practically forcing you to wake up at ungodly hours with him to train

He says its cause “youre getting weak” but really he’s a total simp for having such close contact with you

Also he’s a little brat and put his all into it  so you cant ever beat him, which boosts his ego for some reason?

“Hah, that really the best you got?” he scoffs down at you, his calloused hands pinning you to the ground as his body cages you in for the umpteenth time

Honestly, its hard to fight when your 1) annoyed about loosing and 2) have your hot as hell boyfriend pining you to the ground

But thankfully

THANKFULLY

He was starting to overheat, his breathe coming out in low pants as  strands  of hair began sticking to his forehead

You felt one of his palms begin to slip ever so slightly near you, and on instinct you knew you had to do something, you finally had an opening-

so you caused a distraction 

Your hands quickly flew to the nape of his neck, pressing his head down to your so you could kiss him square on the lips

Bakugo was completely confused in the best way possible- he didnt expect that to happen, but hell, hes not complaining-

until his lips start to tingle

“-the hell?!” he sputters out, his mind trying to figure out what was going on just before you successfuly flip him over, with you now on top

You stared down triumphantly at your boyfriend, not knowing how well that worked- until you noticed how shiny Bakugo lips look

He begins mashing his lips together, trying to rub it off since you had his hands pinned down

“The hell is on my lips? Agh, dont tell me its that weird ass lip stuff that supposed to make your lips bigger or something-’’

Ummmmm how does he know about lip plumping lip gloss? Question for a another day-

“Its chapstick silly,” you giggle, “-cinnamon”

Honestly, he’s gonna like it-this boy likes spicy things and the fact that “spicy” sensation came from his s/o....shoooottttt he is in love

But

Of course

He’s gonna act like it’s wierd or something, cause HES wierd

“Cinnamon? You couldn’t get something normal like cherry or grape?”

You scrunch up your nose, cause yeah your not for those flavors AT ALL, and Bakugo finds his chance

He quickly flips you over, your back now against the floor and his body on top of yours

“Cmon, baka don’t tell me thats seriosuly all you got-“

Don’t remind him that you were able to flip him over tho he’ll turn red and tell you to shut it

｡･:*:･ﾟ★,｡･:*:･ﾟ☆

#bnha #bnha x reader #bnha x reader hc #mha x reader #mha x reader hc #shinsou x reader #bnha shinsou x reader #mha shinsou x reader hc #mirio x reader #bnha mirio x reader #mha mirio x reader #kaminari x reader #bnha kaminari x reader #mha katsuki x reader #sero x #bnha sero x reader #mha sero x reader #bakugo x reader #bnha bakugo x reader #mha bakugo x reader

[shoutoismybaby]

Omega Shame Part 1

Summary: After spending most of your life on suppressants and ignoring your second gender, you finally decide to embrace who you are with your alphas support. But what happens when your alpha Bakugou walks in on you nesting and sparks memories of your past trauma?

warnings: ABO, Nesting, ANGST ending with fluff,

***

Nesting. This was something you hadn't even attempted since you were but a small pup. Both suppressants and fear had kept any desire for this activity far away from you, until a couple months ago. That was when you got a courting proposal, your first ever.

It was a necklace, and not just your typical alphas 'just learned how to make jewelry with string'. No. This necklace required welding, a skill you had no idea about, but that just made sense for your alpha to poses. The chain was a simple silver, leading down to a locket with intricate holes on its top layer, creating an almost explosive like design. The cloth that sat inside was a ruby red color that matched the alphas eyes, and the scent it held was strong of caramel and ash.

Of course if Bakugou was to make a courting gift, his was going to be the best you had ever seen.

You had wasted no time in placing the necklace around your neck, relaxing as his scent filled your nose. It was from this point that you knew Bakugou would make an amazing alpha for you. After all, if he put so much effort into the courting gift, you could only imagine the effort he would put into courting you. Even then in typical Bakugou fashion, he passed all expectations.

It started with the way he would make you lunches, walk you to wherever you needed to go, and made sure to give you a thorough scenting only after he got permission. He always showed concern for your physical and mental wellbeing, stopping you from pushing yourself too hard in training and even scolding you for your self deprecating jokes.

“No one gets to talk down about my omega. Especially not my omega.” He had growled at you once. Again Bakugou did something unexpected, making your omega purr at a growl.

It felt so nice to have someone who cared about you. Someone who encouraged you to stop hiding your second gender from everyone but those in your own class. Not that you had even let your class discover on purpose, but the stressful situations class A had gotten in over the years did wonders for wearing off suppressants and scent blockers. 

He, along with your other classmates, had been building up your confidence in your secondary sex for years now. Bringing you to the realization that being an omega didn't mean that you were weak or any less than betas or alphas. Momo and Ochako were omegas after all, and they were some of the strongest people you knew. So once you had gotten an alpha your omega was basically begging to be set free, and you didn't feel like you had to deny it anymore.

So here you were, after 3 months of being off of the medications your hormones and instincts were finally leveling back to normal. It was something you had never experienced before, but you had Bakugou to help support you along the way. That's why you needed his scent in your nest. No matter how nauseous you felt walking into the young alphas room while you knew he was training, your omega refused to continue the day without at least one peice of his clothing. More than that and you were sure you would be sent into a panic attack. You had no idea how he would react to you doing this. Would he be disgusted? Angry?

Ironically the only thing calming your thoughts was to continue building the nest. Pillows upon pillows methodically shoved between various stuffed animals and blankets became nest shaped as the time passed. Soon enough you were left with just one item left, one of his favorite skull shirts. You had wanted to take something he would miss less, but they weren’t drowned in his scent like this one was. You sat back into the middle of your nest to take a thorough look around. You didn’t want to take too long to decide a place for it by now as you were getting tired. Not to mention you were going to go out on a movie date with Bakugou so you also needed to get ready for that. You would have checked the time if you weren’t so fixated on your task, and that would turn out to be a huge mistake.

You had finally found the perfect place for his shirt when you heard your door open from behind you. In the middle of slipping the clothing item over your pillow you froze as your heart began to race. Your omega knew it was an alpha before you knew who it was and she let out a chirp before you could stop it.

All you could remember was the first time this had happened, an Alpha walking in on your nest. You were seven, not old enough to even present as an omega but tendencies could show early in childhood. You were excited and happily humming as you arranged your blankets, stuffed animals, and your parents best smelling clothes into small yet sturdy walls in the shape of an oval on your bed. You couldn’t help but feel safe, like you would no longer fall off your bed in the middle of the night, or that monsters or other intruders would quickly avoid hurting you once they got just a single sniff of your parents alpha scents. You were proud when you were finished and immediately snuggled into it for a nap, only to wake up to the scent of rotting eggs. A clear indicator your father was both near and very angry. All the yelling and trashing of your hard work that happened next was just a blur. But you could remember how you felt the entire time so vividly. The way your lungs seemed incapable of taking in air, the trembling of your hands and especially the weakness in your knees. Most of all, you remembered the absolute terror as your safe space was invaded. Adrenaline pumped through your veins as fast as your heart would allow it, and you could only sit back and watch.

It was that day that you first became aware that there was something wrong with you. Something gross, weak, and worth hating.

That’s why even when the scent of Bakugou filled your nose, your heart still didn’t slow down. In fact, it only sped up when you finally turned around to look at him, all of the hope you had gotten by convincing yourself he would be happy you were embracing yourself quickly diminishing. His brows furrowed more than normal and his mouth was set in a deep scowl, slightly open just enough that his naturally large canines poked out.

He was angry.

“Do you not know how to answer your fucking phone?! You were so eager to force me to agree to this date and then you don't even respond when I-” Your thoughts were racing far too fast to actually hear what he was saying. Your omega could only think of one thing, your alpha was angry with you. You messed up and now he was angry with you. It was just like your parents, you should have listened to them when they told you it was stupid to nest.

But you had worked so hard on it, and it made you feel so good. You didn’t want your nest to be torn apart again. The smell of smoke wafted from the alphas' palms as you were too caught up in your memories to really hear him. Hear how he was angry with you for forgetting about your date, angry that you had stood him up and too busy being upset to even notice that you were sitting in a nest. The smell of smoke invoked just another event in your mind, one that happened when you had first presented as an omega at 13. Something that caused the damn behind your eyes to finally break.

“PLEASE DON’T DESTROY MY NEST” You Omega sobbed, distressed chips flooding from your chest like air. “Please, please!”

Your outburst startled the Alpha into silence. He could only stand there and watch as his omegas scent was filled with fear as she wiped at her eyes aggressively. A first he was confused, letting his body pump out comfort pheromones instinctually as he let himself observe the situation. You were dressed only in your school uniform, clearly having been building the nest that surrounded you from the time you entered the dorm room to when he had burst into your room, now far past dark. You were trembling too, body curled up in on itself as you hiccupped and begged.

“Please, I'm sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorryyy! Just please dont destroy my nest.” Your voice cracked and it resonated painfully in his ear and his heart dropped. Why did you think he would destroy your nest? Sure he wasn't the best alpha but he wasn’t a monster. Did you really think he would destroy the one place where you felt safest? A weight grew in his chest that left as a deep growl,

“Here.” He growled, “Probably best if we just end this bullshit.”

This was all your fault. If you hadnt built this stupid nest in the first place, or even started crying like a fucking baby then this wouldnt have happened. But you were a weak omega, and just like your parents said, no one can love someone so weak. Especially not someone as powerful as Katsuki. You shouldn’t have let yourself believe that they were wrong for even a second. You had thought that Bakugou would be the one who would love you for who you truly were. But that was naive. No one could love such a burden. No one could love you.

The drop of the crafted bracelet to the ground seconds before your door slammed, leaving you alone once more in your room, proof enough of that.

Your parents were right.

A flame of anger lit in your chest. Why were you so unloveable just the way you were? Why couldn’t you just be different? Why couldn’t you be an alpha like your parents had wanted?

You could feel your nails extend into claws as the hair on your body raised. You glared at the soft material weaved together around you as hot tears built up behind your eyes. This time instead of being fueled by fear they were fueled by rage and resentment.

You were so angry. So angry at youself, at your weak omega, and especially at your stupid nest. You couldn't help but let a couple tears fall as you let your anger get the best of you, and you didn't stop it until you were heaving in the middle of your disaster of a room. Surrounded by torn pieces of fabric and the other contents of your room scattered by your tantrum, you finally let yourself breath. 

You turned around to see the item you had been avoiding, your pillow with bakugou's shirt. With a deep breath you grabbed a hold of the object, digging your claws into its plush softness. The caramel ash smell that permeated the air only helped to break down the remaining bits of your anger. And you didn’t want to be left alone with your despair just yet.

With the release of your breath a ripping sound could be heard. The shirt split and cotton popped out from the opening like popcorn. Once you had successfully dissected what had been a comfort item you threw it somewhere away from you and took another deep breath.

Now you were finally alone. Just you and your reality. You could really feel how much pain your omega was in as your hair began to lower and your normal nails returned. You had heard about this pain before. A deep one in your chest, heartbreak. Your omega seemed to curl around that feeling. Of rejection. Self hatred. That no one would ever need you, let alone want you. You could feel yourself start to slip into the limbo of numbness and searing pain.

An Omega Depression.

You remembered learning about it back when you were in middle school, most people were beginning to present as their second sex. Your teachers had emphasized how important it was to get medical attention at the first signs, you knew how dangerous it was, but all you wanted to do was lay there on the floor. You were tired, and what was the point? No one cared about you, not your parents… not Bakugou. Your throat strained painfully at that thought. Bakugou didn’t want you, and it was your fault.

#bnha x reader #mha x reader #bnha omegaverse #bakugou katsuki x reader #alpha bakugou x reader #bakugo x reader #mha omegaverse

[house-of-otome]

Hello! I was wondering if your request box was open! If it is, do you mind if I request how the brothers would react to Mc making their favourite food/treat upon realizing that they've been having a bad day? And how they would react to Mc saying "Because I care about you," when asked why they did so? Thank you in advance!

I don't mind at all nonnie! This is such a wholesome request, hope you enjoy! ^-^

-----------------------------

Lucifer:

- He was absolutely swamped with paperwork. Most of it actually caused by his brothers one way or another this time, a relatively small portion being from Lord Diavolo.

- He was so tired, but he knew that if he didn't keep going he would never see the bottom of the pile, at least that's how it felt.

- When you knock on his door and he doesn't answer, you decide to quietly slip in with the late night snack you had prepared for him. You find him passed out over his desk, one hand still lightly gripping a pen.

- You go back and forth with yourself on if you should wake him or not, but then decide that this cannot possibly be a comfortable sleeping position, and you also dont want your gift to be wasted. So you gently prod him awake, taking the pen from his hand and softly cooing his name.

- He looks up at you and for a moment his eyes tell you exactly how tired he is, but then he quickly composes himself and the glimmer of vulnerability is gone. When he spots the tasty treat he will be a little surprised and ask you why you brought him this and also how you knew what his favourite was.

- "Because I care about you, I figured you could use something nice today. Also you mentioned it off hand to Lord Diavolo once and I remembered."

- He's so touched, the actual softest of smiles will grace his features. You remembered an off hand comment he made once, you probably had to have Barbatos or someone else show you how to make this, and you went through all that trouble just to cheer him up on a rough day. If he were more impulsive he would confess his love for you right then and there. Instead he thanks you, and it sounds so tender in that moment that it may as well have been a confession.

- It's up to you whether or not you try and convince him to get some sleep after he's done with the food.

Mammon:

- First he gets bossed around by witches all day, then he finally gets home and his brothers start teasing him and saying he's a scumbag again and it's just too much. He's so done he just wants to go to bed.

- He hides it well behind his usual over the top attitude, and his shades are there to hide his eyes. You can tell though, you and Mammon have been practically attached at the hip since about a week into the exchange program, you're honestly surprised that his brother don't notice, but you figure it's because he's put up this act for centuries now.

- So, seeing how exhausted he really is, you decide to do something nice for him and make his favourite snack. You do this sometime after dinner and you're thankful Beel didn't fully raid the fridge and the rest of the kitchen yet so all the items you need are there.

- When you go to bring it to him he's in his room, exhaustion evidenced by the fact he's just lying there starfished out on his bed. You call out his name and he bolts up like he was shot by lightning. He meets you in the middle and asks what you're doing here-- no scratch that, of course you'd want to hang out with the Great Mammon!

- When you're straightforward with him and say that yes you would in fact like to hang out with him and then present him the food it takes a hot moment for everything to process, cuz he's not used to someone doing something so incredibly nice for him.

- "For me? Why?" he's too surprised to put up his usual self agrandizing act. "Because I care about you, silly, and you looked like you could use a pick me up!"

- Is he? Is he crying a little?? No you silly human!! He is not crying! Again, he. is. not. crying. He takes the food from you with a soft lil thanks. He's definitely crying a little, but you don't bring it up for his sake, besides you want him to feel like he can be open with you so this is a nice first step.

[[[READ MORE]]]

Leviathan:

- You got worried about him when he hadn't gotten out of his room at all that day, not even for food or a drink, you're almost convinced he didn't even take any toilet breaks, but you figure that's impossible and that you just hadnt seen him go from his room to the bathroom.

- Either way you see this as a sign that something is wrong and you're going to cheer him up with his favourite anime inspired snack. You'll break his door down if you absolutely must. That last bit was a joke, mostly.

- You knock on his door in the special lil "code" rhythm the two of you have and you hear a soft 'Come in' from inside.

- When you open the door and step inside you spot him at the opposite side of the room sulking in front of Henry 2.0's fish tank. He had been thinking badly about himself again and the thoughts just wouldn't leave him alone.

- You sit down next to him and hand him the little snack you prepared. He looks absolutely baffled, it's kind of heartbreaking in a way. He keeps looking back and forth between the tasty treat and your face, seemingly trying to convince himself it's real, you think he even pinches himself at one point. He eventually manages to stammer out a soft 'why'.

- "Because I care about you! I didn't see you all day, not even at dinner time, I got worried."

- He takes the treat, noting that you didn't make him just anything, you made him his favourite. He's so overwhelmed, he's definitely crying, please don't bring it up;; He manages to sputter out a flustered thank you, and that you're the best. He just barely keeps himself from saying 'I love you'. Once he finishes the food you ask him what was wrong and spend the rest of the evening reassuring him and cheering him up.

Satan:

- Everyone and everything just seemed absolutely hellbent on pissing him off today, His brothers, his teachers, even the weather!

- He was trying to stay calm, really he was trying, but you could feel the rage radiating off of him. When you got back to the House of Lamentation he wasted no time in heading up to his room and slamming the door shut, he needed to be alone for a bit.

- From the loudness of the slam you were almost convinced the door must've fallen off it's hinges. So you decide to go to the kitchen and make him his favourite food, anyone would feel better with their favourite food filling their stomach, right?

- You still wait a good hour before actually heading to his room, knowing he prefers to simmer down on his own for a little while before he's ready to interact with anyone again. But eventually there you are in front of his door, which to your surprise is still intact, and you knock on it. He tells you to come inside and so you do.

- His books are strewn everywhere, and not in the usual organised chaos kind of way, no it's actual pure chaos this time, astronomy books lying mixed with spell books and art related books mixed with mystery novels. It's a mess. You approach him carefully until you're in range enough to sense that most of his anger has died down. And you present him the treat you prepared.

- "You made this for me? Why?" He accepts the plate and thanks you. "Because I care about you and you were having an especially rough day so I figured you could use something like this."

- Those words, combined with your gentle smile at him as you say them, and the fact that it's his favourite food makes all of the remaining anger melt away and he forgets why he was so angry in the first place. Really it's like magic to him how good you are at making him feel at ease. He thanks you again and eats with a smile on his face, a genuine one.

Asmodeus:

- It takes a lot for Asmo to feel down. Spill something on his favourite shirt and he'll get mad sure but it takes a lot for him to feel more than a little miffed. So when he comes home and something seems... off, you're surprised really. And you get worried.

- Clearly something is wrong so you decide you want to do something nice for him. You remember the treat he told you he loves and decide that that will do the trick!

- When you get to his room you find him sitting in front of his vanity mirror looking.... sad actually. He's mindlessly picking up nail polish bottles and putting them back down, not actually really looking at them.

- He had been remembering his time in the celestial realm, how he used to be considered the Jewel of the Heavens. He was still gorgeous now, of course! But... it wasn't the same. When he was an angel people adored him, loved him. Now all most people saw when they looked at him was his sin. And sure he likes to indulge in it, a lot, but he misses the love side of things. He hasn't really loved someone until you came around, and sometimes he worries that you too will only want him for fulfilling your lustful desires.

- When he notices you've entered his room he quickly pulls himself together, greeting you in his usual fashion. You sit down with him and offer him the food.

- He takes it and thanks you with a quick kiss on your cheek or a hug if you'll let him. He asks why you decided to do this for him. "Because I care about you and you seemed like you could use it."

- He thinks it's the sweetest thing and absolutely will cover your face in kisses, again, if you'll let him. He dares to let himself hope that you see past his sin, that you like him for who he is. And he allows himself to let the worry he felt slip away for now.

Beelzebub:

- It was the anniversary of the day they fell, the day they lost Lilith. His sadness had caused him to mess up a lot during his training and his coach was not pleased with him, wondering what in the three realms had gotten into his star player.

- You got concerned both because he wasn't smiling much today and because very unlike him he hadn't been eating nearly as much as usual.

- No matter how hungry he got he felt so nauseous he could barely get anything in him. Even after all these centuries he still blamed himself for the loss of their sister, and it hit him especially hard whenever the anniversary of the Celestial War came around. On top of all of that his brothers had also been arguing more than usual, which obviously didn't help. Everyone was on edge today.

- You decide to make him his favourite snack, he's been eating way too little for his usual standards and it worried you, and also his stomach's rumbling was starting to shake the house.

- You find him, not in his own room, but in Lilith's room that Lucifer had preserved from the celestial realm. He's crying. You gently take his hand and pull him back to his own room, it won't do him any good to stay in hers. You sit him down on his bed, hand him the food and wrap an arm around him in a comforting gesture.

- He asks you why you brought him this before taking the plate, noting that it's his favourite. "Because I care about you, and you seemed really sad so I got worried." "Marry me, MC."

- No but for real tho, he gives you a soft smile and tries to push past his nausea to eat what you gave him, he thinks the gesture is really sweet and he doesn't want your care and effort to go to waste. You don't ask him what had gotten him down, you had already picked up from one of his brothers what day today was. You just sit together in comfortable silence, comforting and reassuring him when prompted until he feels a bit better.

Belphegor:

- He had been having nightmares. About Lilith dying, about falling, about being locked up in the attic, the loneliness that followed, and about what he did to you in the attic. No matter where he decided to lie down to sleep the nightmares still found him. He was exhausted.

- You noticed him walking around the house looking like the walking dead and figured something was up. Whenever he was asked something it was like the question completely blew past him and it took him quite a concerning amount of time to answer.

- It also appeared he had forgotten to eat altogether, so you decide to bring him his favourite. When you bring him the food you find him seemingly passed out on his bed face down.

- You gently call out to him and you find out that he is not, in fact, asleep when he lifts his head up from the pillow.

- You sit down on the edge of the bed with him right as he finishes peeling himself from the sheets. You hand him the food and he blinks at it for a hot second.

- "You made this... for me? ....Why?" He stares at the plate, and at you, as if he can't quite determine whether he's dreaming or awake. "Because I care about you and you forgot to eat." You state simply, but despite the fact that things take a bit for him to process in this state the fact that you made his favourite isn't lost on him.

- It's really touching to him, after all he put you through you still care about him, bothered to remember what his favourite food is and made it for him. He thanks you, too tired to make any teasing remarks, and eats it. He might ask you to snuggle with him when he's done, convinced that having you there will finally keep the nightmares at bay.

#idk if the read more works im on mobile #obey me #obey me leviathan #obey me satan #obey me lucifer #obey me mammon #obey me shall we date #obey me asmodeus #obey me asmo #obey me levi #obey me beelzebub #obey me beel #obey me belphegor #obey me belphie #omswd #omswd lucifer #omswd mammon #omswd asmo #omswd belphegor #omswd levi #omswd satan #omswd beel #omswd belphie #obey me imagines

[midnightmoonkiss]

If Only.

Izuku Midoriya X Fem! Reader

Summary: Who knew having to work on a Saturday could make your pouty boyfriend turn to petty revenge?

WARNINGS!: Short mention of masturbation. Teehee.

Category: Smut / Crack?

Word Count: 1.7k

A/N: A weird short fic I came up with at midnight because I was bored.

Just To Clarify:

Reader and Izuku have been dating for a long while

They do not live together

Izuku is precious but also a little shit.

Of course.

This type of shit always seemed to happen to him.

It had been nearly a month now since he had a weekend off, a weekend to spend time with you, his lovely girlfriend.

Now that he finally had that time off, of course your asshole of a boss had to ruin the lovely date he had been planning to surprise you with by calling you in to write up a stupid ass report that could have definitely waited until Monday.

It really grinded his fucking gears.

Het whined and tried to beg you to stay home early this morning when you called him and told him of this sudden development.

If only you lived together, or if only you had spent the night at his apartment… maybe he could have convinced you to tell your boss off. He was blessed with a skillful tongue after all, one capable of bringing you wave after wave of pleasure as he made himself at home between your glorious thighs.

He sighed heavily, getting up from off his bed where he laid brooding just to go out and collapse back onto his couch.

He could use some of that sunlight pouring in from the large windows.

His room was dark, curtains drawn as if to hide from the world so he could be all pouty by himself.

But it was noon now, and he needed to come out eventually.

On the brighter side of things, he got to catch up on a bit of lost sleep.

That wasn’t enough.

Actually? Fuck sleep.

He’d rather be out on your date he planned with you.

Gah!

Sure, he had tomorrow to spend with you, but who wants to do anything on a Sunday? 

Lazy Sunday!

The day reserved for people to relax and.. and be lazy!

A day to cuddle.

A day to use his girlfriends’ boobs as a pillow.

One he’d much rather be using now than the stiff one currently under his head.

He rubbed the sleep from his eyes, just so that he could stare blankly up at the ceiling fan idly spinning in a circle.

His thoughts drifted to you again.

He wondered what you were doing.

Was it lunch break time for you yet?

No.. you had lunch around 11.

Damn. Maybe he could’ve visited you…

He groaned, flinging himself off the couch, dragging his mismatched sock covered feet over to the kitchen so he could begrudgingly make himself some coffee.

He propped his elbows on the counter, leaning his body down just so he could watch in childish wonder as the tan liquid rained down in a heavy stream from the Tassimo coffee machine he had recently purchased.

Coffee was never really his thing as a kid, but as the stress of his late teen years consumed his exhausted body, he quickly found that coffee could be an amazing friend.

Thus started his addiction, fueled on by his friends, mother, and hell - even you.

Something about.. ‘Joining the ranks of eternal, bitter madness.’

Whatever the fuck that meant.

You’re a goofy shit, he can’t tell what half the crap you say means anyway.

That’s why he loved you, though.

Always kept on his tiptoes.

He could always read people so easily, predict their moves almost to a T, but you? Damn if he wasn’t left with questions every time you met up.

You could say, in a way, you were like coffee.

Something he didn’t know he needed until it hit him in the face and caused him to fall down three flights of stairs.

He smiled to himself as he sipped at his steaming hot cup o’ joe.

That day was painful, but in the long run - he sure was glad it happened. Even if he did have a first degree burn from the boiling hot coffee you spilled on him.

Yeah. That meeting wasn’t exactly dreamish like how most couples described how they met.

Then again, his best friend did meet the love of his life on Grindr, so who knows? 

Couples just like to sugar coat things in order to look good in front of others.

Him? No. He didn’t sugar coat anything. How you met was funny, and it always brought a smile to people’s faces. 

It even made his mom pass out from laughing so hard.

Absolutely mad.

You brought a good crazy to his life.

That’s why he needed you.

Especially now.

He was lonely, and all this reminiscing just made him miss you even more.

With the buzz of caffeine coursing through his body, he felt more energized than before.

He wanted to text you.

Surely he could, right?

But what about?

He pulled at his bottom lip, eyebrows furrowed as he paced around his silent apartment, deep in thought about ways to suddenly ‘slide into your dms.’

.

..

…

He stopped, a sinister smirk creeping onto his angelic face.

oh , he certainly knew how to catch your attention.

He didn’t waste a second of his time, teeth chewing at his lip as he made his way back into the bedroom, turning on his red lava lamp to envelop his dark room in that sinful glow you loved so much.

He stripped himself of his shirt as he sat down on his bed, hand coming up to style his curly green hair in a way he knew you liked from all those seductive stares you’d give him.

This was all about you. 

Well, him too he supposed, but honestly? He wanted to give you a peek at what could’ve been if only you stayed home.

No doubt you’d find him cruel, perhaps respond with hostility, but he craved it.

He loved teasing you.

And getting a bit of petty revenge.

Besides, this was your fault, after all. None of this would have been unlocked if you hadnt given him a major boost in confidence with every kiss against his skin, every praise, every longing stare.

You should have known what you had gotten yourself into.

He let his ‘innocent’ thoughts drift to the dirtier side of his mind, trailing a hand down his toned stomach just to palm his already half-hard self through his boxers. What could he say? He got worked up quite easily when it came to his princess.

For a guy publically labeled ‘The Epitome Of Purity,’ his thoughts surely would prove everyone who thought that wrong with just how explicit they were.

Images of you flashed through his mind, your face so cute and angelic as his cock fucked your throat raw.

Boy, did he wish you were here, doing just that instead of his hand that had just now wrapped around himself.

He indulged for a moment, getting lost in the sweet pleasure his experienced hand brought to him, spare arm flung over his eyes as he moaned breathlessly into the quiet air.

After a few more pumps mixed with thrusts of his easily excited hips, his hand was coated in the precum he always seemed to make too much off.

He groaned in frustration as he realized he’d have to perform his next task with his left hand, he could only hope it’d turn out well and not a shaky mess as it has been before.

He grabbed his phone conveniently left on his bedside table, thumbprint quickly unlocking it.

He entered the camera app, tapping on the camera switch tool so that his face was shown on the screen.

Oh.

Hm.

Perfection.

He looked impatient, desperate like he was having a good time and couldn’t wait for you to join in the fun. He knew full well you couldn’t, you wouldn’t get off from work for another four hours - that’s where the revenge came into play. You’d sit there in your office cubicle, knowing damn well by the time you got to him he would have already finished and started dinner. His cheeks were a pretty rouge, pupils blown wide.

Moving the camera back, he fought for the perfect angle, wanting this picture - and maybe a few more after, to be absolutely perfect.

The red glow of the lamp showered his body in a lewd light, sweat glimmering even on the screen.

He made sure his fully hard and throbbing cock dripping with pre-cum was in the picture, having to sacrifice the top half of his head in order to fit it in.

His hairstyling went to waste for this one picture, but he’d be sure to include it in others.

His pecs were covered in faded marks you had left on him from nights ago, nipples perky and wanting some rough attention.

He gave a lopsided grin, the only part of his face that was in the picture was his mouth, and he’d be damned if he wasn’t going to use it to make your blood boil.

He snapped the picture, and a few more in different poses for later use. 

The end result? A new private photo album labeled ‘Pictures To Send To (Y/N) To Get Her Panties In A Twist.’

God, he’s an ass when he wants to be.

With a dark, twisted look in his eyes and a creepy smile on his freckled face, he sent the photo to you, body shivering in anticipation. His thumb hovered over the send button, ready to send a reply to his photo once he saw that you read it.

Meanwhile, you had just finished typing up a long report when your phone buzzed with a message.

Hope surged in your chest, praying it was your cutsie boyfriend Izuku.

You hadn’t heard from him since 6AM when you called to deliver the disappointing news, and you had assumed he either went back to sleep or decided to work out till he passed out.

You really hoped it was the first option.

Maybe you could ask?

With a sigh of triumph, you emailed the report to your boss, fishing your phone from the far side of your desk where you had left it after lunch.

Ah!

It was Izuku~

You hummed in confusion when you noticed it wasn’t a message, but instead - an image?

Lips pursed, you swiftly unlocked your phone and opened the messenger app.

You nearly squealed when you saw the image - the embodiment of lewd and lust.

Fuck.

Your face was burning red, hair no doubt frizzing up as your face contorted into embarrassment and anger.

Suddenly, a reply popped up - one that made you fidget in your seat as a familiar wet heat started to pool between your thighs.

“If only you stayed home, huh?”

Oh, he was so going to get his ass beat once you got off work.

#izuku midoriya x reader #deku x reader #izuku x reader #midoriya x reader #midoriya izuku x reader #bnha #mha #izuku midoriya #izuku #deku #midoriya izuku #my hero academia #boku no hero academia #x reader #bnha x reader #mha x reader #my hero academia x reader #n/sfw

[witchcraft-in-wonderland]

Strangers (Pt.7)

-------------------------

"So the necklaces are magic then?" Logan said, twisting the unicorn necklace in his hands.

"Looks like it, but I'm more interested in how similar their owners look to us," said Janus, who had taken the book from Virgil's hands to examine the pages.

Virgil, meanwhile, was still frozen stiff.

"Virgil?. . ." Patton placed a hand on Virgil's shoulder and shook him slightly.

"We have to put them on. . ." Virgil whispered.

"What do you mean?" Patton said, tilting his head.

"We have to learn how to use these abilities in order to bring Romulus down, we have to wear the necklaces to use the abilities. . ." Virgil said, hand running over the gems embedded in the spider necklace.

"Virgil- I promise if anything weird happens we'll take them off, ok? Tear them off our necks if you have to, we arent going to hurt you," Patton said softly,now realizing what was going on in Virgil's head.

Virgil merely nodded as he watched each of his friends clip the necklaces around their necks.

It felt familiar in a way,but Virgil didnt want to think about it.

"Ok, step one, I'm going home," Virgil said.

This was followed immediately by a chorus of protests.

"Nonono think about it! Romulus will never let us get near him if we stand on opposite sides, he needs to think I've decided to trust him again, I need to be able to lure him out so he's vunerable," Virgil said. The others looked at each other and back at him a few times, before finally nodding.

"Be careful, for our sake as well as yours," Janus said, giving Virgil one last hug before he walked out the door.

He'd been expecting Romulus when he got home of course, but what he hadnt expected was being caught against the door.

"You know Virgil, for someone with such vivid nightmares I'd think you had a better memory," Romulus snarled.

"R-Romulus what are you-" Virgil was shaking already- gods why couldnt he be as brave as he'd been in the library.

And then it hit him.

The first night he'd met Romulus, before he'd even realized that his beloved roman was no longer himself.

"W-wait Romulus its not- I didnt-" Virgil could feel his heart rate quickening.

"Oh dont worry princess, I'm actually quite happy you found that book, this facade was getting dreadfully dull to keep up," Romulus purred, Virgil was practically begging for an escape route of some sort.

"As you've probably figured out, I'm not your precious Roman, and I never was, this is merely a vessel, and you? Merely a pawn to win back my kingdom~" said Romulus, lifting Virgil's face up by his chin.

"A pawn can become a Queen if it survives long enough," Virgil said with a snarl.

"Aw, how cute, you act as though that's not exactly what I have planned~" Romulus said, now letting go of Virgil's face.

"Try to get some rest princess, I'll be making dinner," Romulus cooed as he walked away.

Virgil stood in the doorway for a few more minutes before finally retreating to his room to change.

Only to find all of his clothes had been replaced by crimsons and reds and golds and blacks, all dresses or sheer or just in general things he'd never wear of his own accord.

He debated sleeping in his mud-soaked clothes instead, but ultimately decided that it was better to sleep in a night gown rather than get sick or track mud on the sheets, not to mention, it would make Romulus happy, and that was integral to the plan.

It was about an hour before Romulus had walked into the room and shook Virgil awake.

"Dinners ready princess," Romulus said quietly. Virgil stretched and sat up, keeping one eye open when he rubbed another.

"I see you found your new wardrobe, I think it suits you much better than purple and black," Romulus said as he pulled Virgil off the bed and into the dining room.

The food tasted good of course, but Virgil could now immediately recognize something off about it, but he couldnt make himself suspicious.

"I'm sorry for running away. . ." Virgil mumbled.

"Its alright princess, you're here now, and you wont be leaving again," said Romulus.

"Of course not," Virgil replied.

Virgil couldnt have been happier when Romulus finally fell asleep, as soon as he heard snoring, he made a move to the basement.

Something about it all seemed familiar, in an unhappy sense, I left a bitter taste in Virgil's mouth to be standing in the dark basement, watching as creatures he wouldnt have wanted to see in his worst nightmares formed and dissipated in front of him.

Romulus didnt suspect a thing in the morning, or at least, he didnt seem to, which was, mildly concerning.

But it didnt matter to Virgil now, he had to practice at some point, and the night time was the safest he could think of.

The nightmares became easy eventually, but it was getting harder and harder to pretend he'd had a good nights rest in front of Romulus.

"Princess are you sure you're well? You look dreadfully tired," said Romulus, rubbing circles into Virgil's shoulders- gods it felt good.

Virgil bit back a yawn, "I'm fine Romulus- I promise, just a rough night-" Virgil said.

"Well perhaps youd like a nap then?" Said Romulus.

"I-"

"No no, I insist, let's get you back in bed," said Romulus, rather uncharacteristically, which only served to further Virgil's concerns.

And he was right to be concerned, because he woke up so tightly wrapped in sheets that he could barely move his arms.

"Romulus! I'm awake!" Vitgil called helplessly.

"I know princess, but I dont think you've gotten quite enough sleep, unless of course, you want to try out the last part of those nightly lessons~" Romulus said as he walked into the room.

"Its your choice princess, a little bit of necromancy, or stay trapped here until your friends come to rescue you and inevitably fail, again~" Romulus said tauntingly.

Virgil weighed his options for a few moments.

"Alright- fine-" he said through gritted teeth, if only he hadnt been to cowardly to perform it before, he might never have been in this mess.

Romulus walked over and quite easily moved him out of the bedding.

Virgil sat up and stared foward, expression blank, and raised a hand.

And soon enough a figure rose from seemingly nowhere, dressed in gilded blacks golds and crimsons, with rusty red hair, and eyes as black as charcoal.

Virgil heard a laugh, and turned to find a slump of white and red breathing on the bed behind him.

The figure he'd just raised was the one laughing, a manic cackle only accentuated by the clear decay.

Romulus wasn't unattractive by any means, but time certainly hadnt been kind to him.

But the only thing Virgil could focus on was that, yes, he had his husband back, but he'd just unleashed his worst enemy in their home.

----------------------------------------------

Tag list:

@that-peach-anon

@baka-monarch

@lazyboneslover

@lovelivingmydreams

@coffeeoverdosedshipper

@extraintrovertedalien

@thefivecalls

@willowaudreykeyes

@pricklyfish777

@the-sad-strawberry

@itsnithbabey

@private-snippers

@0exterc0

@rich-flower-17

@theonetruebeepboop

@mycatshuman

@teamplutoforlife

@melodiread

@meowthefluffy

@frawkeye

@cemmy

@nerosdayinhell

@thecolorfulolive

@frog-candy-bee

#cori writes #strangers au #ts patton #ts remus #ts virgil #ts sides #ts logan #ts roman #ts emile #ts remy #ts janus #ts romulus #ts pride roman #tw abuse #tw fear #tw nightmares #tw sleep deprivation #prinxiety #romantic prinxiety #tw toxic relationship #pridexiety #toxic pridexiety

[bbaronpiper]

Wake up call

Here’s another collab with @artsaree​. She’s amazing. you should definitely check out her writings.  So basically, we both wrote half of it . 

warnings: smut

Aron x Reader

my part

7:30 am. Your eyes shot open at the sound of your alarm you turned it off quickly but you still heard a low groan coming from the other side of the bed. You felt Arón stir a little but refused to open his eyes. You turn to face him and run a finger on his cheek. Savoring the few moments you have with your boyfriend. You slept last night without him. He was out partying with his friends. Again. You didn’t have a problem with it at first because you swore you’ll never be that type of girlfriend who controls and forbid their man on the things they want to do. Until recently, it became a habit of his.

“Morning, Baby” His voice was low and husky.      

You smiled at him in return, scooting closer. “Slept well?”

“Si” He said while rubbing his eyes. “Partying after spending whole day on set isn’t easy”

You bit the insides of your cheek to stop you from spitting the words. Arón must have noticed this since he then turned to lie on his back and exhales. Leaving your hand that was on his cheek to fall on his shoulder. “Do you have something to say Y/N?”

You leaned on your elbow trying to get him to look at you. Your hands travelled down to his chest “Don’t you think you’ve been partying a lot lately?”

“Mmm Don’t think so..” he shrugged still not looking at you.

“You’re barely home” you almost whispered not sure if you want to push this discussion.

“What do you mean Y/N? I’m always home” he then looked at you.

You were about to open your mouth to spill everything you’ve been feeling lately but then decided not to. He probably too tired for drama anyways.

“Come here” he motioned to you as he opened his arms. You complied and laid on his chest. “Te quiero.” He lifted your chin up and look at you deeply. “Don’t ever think otherwise. Even just for one second” stupid you, let your heart flutter at his words smiling up at him sweetly.

You splash cold water on your face to snap you out of your thoughts. You stare yourself at the mirror and saw your red and puffy eyes. You kept staring blinking rapidly trying to stop the tears from forming. You stood there for what felt like years before wiping your face with a clean towel. You held your breath one last time, tightly shut your eyes only to open them again, exhale and went out of the bathroom and into your shared bedroom.

2:40 am and he’s still not home. Why are you not surprised?

It was so obvious. Looking back now, you felt like a complete idiot blindsided by love. You should’ve seen it coming when he gave you that smile that didn’t reach his eyes anymore, the way your lips touched and moved in sync but the desire to have you was gone.

“Bet you couldn’t last a day without fucking me” you laughed as you teased him. You two just finished fucking and were now watching a movie when his hands travelled up to your thighs again.

“Is that a challenge?” he raised an eyebrow.

“Nahh, just stating facts” you then got this brilliant idea to get back at him for all those times he made you beg and tease you. You straddled him, bury your face onto his neck softly gliding your lips against his skin while your finger trace against his bare chest. You wore nothing but an oversized shirt of his. Nothing underneath so you’re pretty sure he felt how wet you are right now. Normally, this would work. Arón never declined sex.

“Bebe” you whispered to his ear seductively and nibbled on it after.

“Shhh!!! Here comes the best part!” his eyebrows furrowed as he pointed on the screen.

Oh this was gonna be hard. “So, you’re saying, you wouldn’t touch me even if I am naked?” he shrugged, his lips formed an inverted smile with his eyes still glued to the TV. You then took your shirt off. And you swore you heard a soft “damn” coming from him. You just wanted to mess with him, tease him but the feeling of his skin touching yours turned you on as you start grinding him through his boxers moaning close to his ear.

Nada. No emotions.

You sighed in frustration so you decided to take it to another level. You then turned your back at him leaning on his chest, you open your legs wide and draped your legs on his. You smirked as you can already feel his growing bulge against your ass.

“I hate to fuck myself but since my boyfriend’s ignoring me…. Oh well” you announced as your hand gripped his leg and your other hand start to play with your clit. Rubbing small circles and moaning softly at first. You can feel him shifting underneath you. you were surprised when he grabbed your waist and push you off of him and sat you on the side.

“Yo.. you’re b-blocking the view,Y/N” he said uneasy. His hands gripped his thigh and bit his lower lip way too hard for you not to know he’s about to give in.  

You scoffed at him “Oh it’s on!” you then place your left leg again on his right one and start to rub your clit faster than before making you moan so loud saying things like “Ohhh baby…” “Si, Arooonnn, si!” you’re so wet it made it easier to switch from rubbing your clit into inserting two fingers inside you. your other hand then reached for his growing bulge. He refused to touch you but you definitely wouldn’t refuse to touch him. You started palming him as you pleasure yourself earning a low growl from him. “Let me ride you baby”

You then suddenly felt his hand over yours, the one you had on your pussy and jerk it. “You drive me crazy”

  @artsaree​ /Sara’s part

He managed to push you away a little so he could finally flip you both over so he was now on top.

Smirking down at you he pulled down his pants, making his hard dick slap against his lower stomach.

„Open up.“

You bit your lip and jerked your head back to give him easier access to hover over your face. Slowly he slid his dick in your welcoming mouth, making both of you moan out softly.

„Mhm just like that.“ he groaned and held onto the wall for support as you were sucking his tip seductively.

„Take it.“ he suddenly spoke and pushed his length into your mouth. It was always a little hard for you to fit all of him in your little mouth but he still made sure you were okay.

There was still a little space left so you nodded at him to tell him he could push his entire dick in your mouth.

„Dont want you to gag, u know that.“ he just mumbled but did as you told him and he slid his cock deeper.

„Ah fuck.“ he groaned and threw his head back in pleasure.

You could feel tears building up, he seemed to notice too because he pulled out completely. You swallowed and took a deep breath. „You good?“ he spoke but you just replied by bringing his tip back to your lips.

„Mh good girl.“ he moaned out as you kitten licked his tip.

„On your stomach babygirl.“ he groaned after you had sucked on his tip for a bit.

He got off of you and stood up to get a condom from the drawer.

Meanwhile you lied down on your naked stomach and waited for him.

„Open your legs for papi.“ he growled as you felt a harsh smack on your left ass cheek. That made you moan out in pain but it also felt good. It wasnt hardcore pain, but you did know it would leave a spot.

You opened your legs and lifted your hips up a little.

„Yes good.“ you heard his deep voice behind you.

Arón grabbed a pillow and placed it under your hips for support. „Ready for my cock honey?“ he asked.

„Yes papi.“ you moaned as a response before he slowly slid his hard cock into your trembling pussy. „Ah fuck you‘re always so tight.“ he whispered and grabbed your hips roughly.

Without hesitation he started slamming into you as if there was no tomorrow. With harsh thrusts he kept hitting your g-spot, making your eyes roll back and your mouth fall open.

Arón was moaning loudly as you could already feel him getting closer.

He changed his angle a little by aiming higher, laying down on your butt.

„Babe.“ he growled and suddenly grabbed you by your hair.

He he never done that before.

And he knew you didnt like it since your head was sensitive.

But that moment you were so turned on, you didnt even think of stopping his actions.

Arón fucked you roughly and fast while you were moaning out his name or cursed. You could hear him panting against your back.

„Im coming baby.“ he groaned and slammed into you with no mercy. You couldnt keep it any longer either.

Two last thrusts and he had you coming for him. Your body started shaking as your orgasm went through your body like lightening.

„Yes baby come on.“ he smacked your butt once again until he came as well. „Fuck yes.“ he almost screamed and jerked your head up on your hair.

It hurt but you were too concentrated on your own orgasm you didnt realize.

Your back was up against his chest while his cock was twitching in you, spilling his cum into the condom.

„Ah fuck.“ he breathed out as he calmed down from his intense orgasm.

You were pretty exhausted too and just expected him to cuddle you and finish the movie but he suddenly whispered:“On your back.“

You were confused but followed his commands and lied down.

„Put your arms behind your back. No touching until I come back.“

By nodding you agreed and he left the room without saying any more.

You waited patiently for him to come back and it was really hard not to touch yourself. You just came, yes, but your clit hadnt gotten any of his attention yet. And usually he ate you out before sex or at least rubbed your clit while he was fucking you.

It took him about 5 minutes to finally return to the bedroom, he was now wearing jeans, but his upper body was still exposed.

„Did you touch yourself baby?“

You shook your head truthfully and spoke:“No I didnt.“

-„Promise?“ he asked and stood in front of the bed looking at you.

„I promise daddy.“

He nodded and finally climbed inbetween your legs.

„Good girl.“

He spread your legs carefully before finally attaching his lips to your thighs, placing soft kisses everywhere.

This boy could really fuck you rough and tell you you‘re his baby a second later.

Your hands were still behind your back, just as he had told you to, while his tongue was tracing circles on your thighs and lower stomach.

„Arón.“ you moaned out, seeking pleasure.

He loved being called daddy or papi, but hearing you say his name was his biggest turn on. He loved your voice, and when it said his given name he got reminded how much he loves you really.

„You sure you deserve this for being such a bitch to me before?“ he played.

„Arón please.“ you exclaimed and looked down at him.

He was just laying there, looking up at you, no part of his body touching yours anymore.

„You know what. Nah. Maybe tomorrow.“

#aron piper imagines #aron x reader #aron piper #aron x you #aron smut #aron fan

[shhh-no-ones-home]

a million and one (*) chris motionless x reader

+++++++++ Request from @motionless-whore98 : "I'm wanting to do one where I'm dating Chris motionless and we get into a big argument and break up before he goes on tour but we end up getting back together I want it be smutty if you can"

(*) - not smut but leads to it and has the immediate after

also i am so sorry this took so long but thank you for being patient with me, i do hope you like it!

Song: the two tongues (screaming salvation) by as it is

tag list: @musicsexandpizza69 @svintsandghosts @alilpunkrock @cynic-spirit @theoneandonlykymberlee @thisplace-ishaunted @lifeisabitchandsoareyou @satans-arse ( @joeynihil and @dracomalfoyswifey you are both still on my list but i know blogs have changed, if you would like to continue to be on the list great! if not thats perfectly fine too just lemme know so i can take you off ^-^ thanks!) +++++++++

"so ive been thinking."

i said slowly, looking to chris across the table from me. we hadnt really talked much about tour in the past weeks and its been daunting, constantly in the back of my mind. i didnt want to do this but i couldnt stop myself anymore.

"okay?"

he said, brow raised. he looked almost intrigued. i scraped a prong of my fork lightly against the plate in front of me.

"i dont think I can do this anymore."

I looked down at the table almost ashamed. I just wanted to get this over with.

"What are you saying?"

He said slowly. When I looked back up at him he was staring me down, hurt written all over his features. I frowned.

"I can't handle this back and forth like I thought I could. Everything was so nice in the beginning but every time you leave I just feel so alone."

He drew his brows.

"I don't wanna be that person but I did tell you you could come along-"

"And leave my life?"

I cut him off. He set his fork down.

"Okay but you can't blame this on me. I did offer-"

I held my hand up.

"I get that, Chris, but I just can't handle this. I can't handle the guilt of not going but I also refuse to leave my job, my home, my life; for months at a time. I love you, I really do. But for my own sanity I can't do this anymore."

He seemed like he was getting angrier and the few patrons at the tables around us had began to look and point. I felt even worse now than I did when coming to terms with this decision.

"So what you're saying is you don't want me anymore."

I looked down and shook my head.

"That not it at all."

I looked back to him.

"Like I said, I do love you. I care so deeply for you. But I can't physically or emotionally deal with you coming and going all the time."

He nodded slowly.

"Can't we make this work? Even a little bit?"

I let out an exasperated laugh.

"How?"

He threw his hands in the air.

"Hell I don't know, take a leave of absence? Video call more? Spend more time together all around?"

I sighed.

"We both know that's not gonna work."

He closed his eyes and turned his head to the ceiling. I could see the vein at the base of his neck pop out a little bit as he got more frustrated.

"Okay."

He said, looking back at me. He nodded.

"Okay, I'll let go. But I don't want this to end badly. I do love you too and I want so badly for this to work."

I could tell he really meant it but I just couldn't do this.

"I know, I did too, but at this point it just can't last."

He let out a long breath.

"Is it alright if I wait till after tour to get my stuff from your house?"

I nodded.

"Yeah, I'll keep it safe till you get back."

°°°°°°°°°

I wiped my hands on the kitchen towel as a knock came from my front door a second time.

"I'm coming!"

I yelled.

"Calm down."

I said, rolling my eyes as I reached the door. I unlocked it and swung it open only to see Chris standing in front of me with a small smile on his face.

"I'm back."

He said with a half laugh, scratching the back in his neck. He had been gone for almost two months. I had almost forgot we had broken up... I still talked to him while he was gone so not much had changed. Other than the tone and energy of everything of course.

"I see that."

I said amused.

"Can I come in? I came for my stuff if that's okay."

He asked and I nodded.

"Uh, yeah, I have most of it packed."

I pointed to a box in the living room as he entered. There was still some clothes I hadn't packed yet but most of his other stuff was ready to go.

"I do wish you would've called first though, I just finished making dinner."

He blushed a bit as he knelt in front of the box.

"Yeah sorry about that but I was in the neighborhood and figured I'd try."

I nodded.

"That's okay, I made enough for two. if you want to stay?''

He looked back up at me and smiled.

"I'd love that, and maybe take a look around and make sure I've got everything before I leave?

I let out a short laugh.

"Yeah if you want I don't mind, in case I forgot anything. The only thing I haven't really packed is your clothes."

He nodded, noticing my shirt.

"I see that."

I frowned for a second before looking down. I hadn't even realized till now. I always wore this shirt, it didn't even occur to me that it wasn't mine. Not anymore at least.

"Right."

He laughed a little.

"How about we start in the bedroom."

I nodded and followed him as he walked down the hallway. When we got there I stood in the doorway and watched him, pulling open drawers slowly and inspecting them. He grabbed the few things and tossed them in the empty box by the closet before going in. I had really meant to pack it all, I just hadn't gotten around to it. I sighed and walked further into the room to watch as he dropped more clothes into the box. The last was a large black hoodie with the 'gentlemans hockey club' on it that he always wore. God those days out skating were some of my favorite. I sighed, crossing my arms over my chest and looking to the ground.

"You okay?"

He asked, snapping my attention. I shrugged.

"Yeah I'm fine."

He stepped closer to me and I dropped my arms.

"I guess that's the only thing not packed."

He said, reaching for the shirt and rubbing his fingers over the hem. I tried to study his face, us just staring at each other for a second, neither wanting to let go. Before I knew it he was inching forward, looking to my lips quickly, then to my eyes for protest. he wouldn't get it though. He kissed me gently and I couldn't help but melt into him, draping my arms over his shoulders. I had missed him so much and so badly didn't want to let this go. When he pulled away I was quick to kiss him again, our mouths moving against each other.

"i still need my shirt back."

he said a little breathless. i nodded.

"youre right."

i said pulling it up and over my head before kissing him again, very needy this time. he kissed me back with passion as we walked back into the bed.

"god i missed you."

he said as we fell back, him laying on top of me as we breathed heavily.

"i missed you too."

i said before kissing him again, running my fingers gently over his face. his hands roamed my body slowly as we made out.

"Chris?"

I asked through kisses. He hummed in response.

"Nevermind, keep going."

°°°°°°°°°

As we laid side by side, panting heavily, my head reeled. I told myself I wouldn't go through with this but here I was contemplating it again. I heard him laugh lightly as he ran his hand over his exposed stomach. I looked over at him, a huge grin on his face.

"What?"

I asked, not sure what joke I missed. He shook his head.

"It's nothing I just, did not expect today to go like this at all."

He looked over at me and I couldn't help the smile creeping its way across my lips too.

"You and me both babe."

He studied my face for a second before rolling onto his side and staring at me. I thought for a second before mirroring him.

"I don't want you to go."

I said softly, his hand making its way to my cheek.

"I thought you said this couldnt work."

I nodded.

"I know but as much as I hate seeing you go I can't help but revel in the feeling of having you home. I missed that so much."

I said, watching his eyes dance back and forth looking to my own.

"Ya know, all of tour I kept telling myself things were complicated. Not that we were over, just that we needed work. And maybe that's true."

I placed my hand on his and held it for a second.

"Are you willing to give this another try?"

I asked hopeful. He nodded before kissing the tip of my nose gently.

"I'm willing to give this a million more tries."

#wattpad #x reader #chris motionless #miw #imagines #one shots #267 #request

[oh-theatre]

Objection!: Chapter 28

Chapter title: Two Unlikely Loves

A/n: Im sorry chapters have been shorter and they've been so bad im so so sorry im trying and im messing up and im just trying and im sorry for the awfulness that is this chapter. anyway here you go

First | Previous | Next

words: 2031

summary: Tensions run high as the courthouse is under siege

pairings: Eventual logicality, prinxiety, platonic demus, romantic remile

warnings: Murder mention, child murder, Law and Courtroom, swearing, blood, hospital, crime scene,  murder, gun mention, guns, swearing, abuse, graphic descriptions, alcohol, shooting, crying

Ao3 Link  

They all rushed in, practically tripping over one another.

“Patton!” They cry, all in different tones of utter concern. Not Logan however, he bides his time, avoiding eye contact as everyone gives their hearty hellos and tearful reliefs. “Why don't we give them some time?” He hears Barbara whisper, the group nods and somehow he's left alone in the awkward silence of an unusually quiet Patton. Realizing he hadn't said a word to anyone who had come in. 

“Lo” he begins, Logan hears his voice finally and he understands what he feels. Anger, he wishes not to speak to Patton. Not now, not ever. “Logan” Patton tries again, the man can hear the softest break in his sweet tone. What was he thinking? How dare he ignore Patton. 

He coughs, breaking his own silence but that's it. He will not make the first move, he should have been trusted. Why didn't he..”trust me?” He hadnt meant to let the words fall, he hadn't given them such permission. 

“Oh starlight”

Damn Patton was good, he almost took to look at him. He continues to stare around the room, it felt bland, unlike his gorgeous eyes who he could find himself lost in. He listens, the shifting and sudden grunts of struggle catches him off guard. He turns, finding Patton's feet trembling as he clutches desperately to his IV line as he barely steps forward. Logan can see the pain and he finds himself completely in motion.

“Patton” He chides, rushing over he takes the shaking arms, situating the stubborn lawyer back on the edge of the bed. Kneeling in front of him with a deep breath of relief. “Do you enjoy bringing pain” Logan jokes, but finds no ease in Patton's face. The tears swell and he shakes his sorry head. “Oh sunshine” He sighs

“I'm so sorry” Patton laments, Logan, though slight, shakes his apology away. He leans up, taking the man's cheek, kissing him softly as they melt into one. God how he missed him. Patton deepend said kiss, not that either mind one bit. 

“If you ever..” Logan begins, gasping for short breaths, his blush quite noticeable “Do that again..” Patton nods, understanding instantly. 

“Not planning too...at least not this year” He shrugs, Logan nudges him, squeezing his leg sweetly. “C’mere” He gestures, they connect once more, it's soft and feels light in this heavy world. Once away, they allow their fingers to fiddle together, the puzzle just fits. It was their puzzle, years to find all the corner pieces but now it was their turn to fill in the middle. A quick gasp escapes Patton, he pushes gently on Logan. “The twins!” He exclaims, was it some kind of sense?

“Papa!” They cry in unison, rushing into the room barreling through Logan. Both decide to speak the fastest they can muster, speeding through their weeks and adventures. Patton listens intently, his eyes hazing to a prideful Logan. He wasn't sure what came over him but the overwhelming feeling of simply breaking down was noticeable. Not to the twins, nor Emile….but Logan saw it instantly. 

“Hey, why don't you both venture to the shops with Emile and pick out a nice gift for your father” Logan suggests, Patton trembles as he waves them a careful goodbye not sure how much longer he can hold up. Once the door shuts Logan works quick as Patton shatters. Seeing the twins was the breaking point, his head pounds. Logan helps the quiet man and his tears back into bed, once settled he cuddles Patton, a comforting rub to his harms and Patton clutches hard. Logan can feel the wet soak him but he doesn't care, nothing but Patton concerns him.  

“I'm so sorry” He sniffles, barely audible through his almost fearful sobs. As if any louder and he could get in serious trouble...Logan's heart sunk. He pushes the image of Liam out of his mind kissing Patton's forehead. This was their room, area and moment. Nobody dare touch the ever fragile bubble. Ready to collapse, become delicate glass to fall.  It takes awhile but the exhaustion sets in and Patton falls into it, releasing Logan before he does, giving him the freedom not to bear him down. Logan sighs sitting up, he checks the clock realizing he himself may have dozed off as well. The best sleep he had gotten in a month, though guilty he was so thankful for Patton being here, awake. 

“Mm” He rubs his eyes, the bags becoming prominent under them. He doesn't flinch feeling Patton wrap his arms around Logan, laying his head on the lawyer's shoulder. A sweet kiss to his neck, a tingle he had missed sent down his back. 

“You're exhausted” Patton identifies, connecting their hands. Logan scoffs, a smile with a tinge of truth however. “I'm here, you can rest Lo” Patton promises, soothing comfort down Logan's arm and cheek. Logan bites down, clenching his jaw so tight it begins to pulse. He avoids anything that will reflect his delicate state. Logan takes Patton's hand, kissing it but he isn't there. His mind floods with schedules and routines, meals and things he must do, children cries and joy.

And he loves it. 

Yes he's drained, but all he can think of is the conversation he had with Patton eons ago. Thats how he felt, these children could take everything from him. Sleep, food, anything and hed smile with delight.  

“I'd like to move in” Logan proposes, Patton chuckles into his shoulder. A tired smile accompanied with a nod. Logan takes this as his moment to convince, quickly preparing an argument but Patton has his own idea.

“And here I thought you already had” Patton laments, Logan yawns but hes amused. Something about the way he felt with Patton allowed him to enjoy it. Allowed him to just relax, always helps that Patton had taken to massaging Logan without a prompt. But out the window there he was, he knew Patton felt it, his shoulders tightened. “Dearest?” Patton hums, kissing him gently. 

“We need to talk about Virgil” 

~~~

“I want to see my little boy” Patton sings, Remy chuckles as Emile brings Thomas forth. Cradling the baby in Patton's arms.

“Here he comes” Emile teases, Patton giggles, joined by the baby soon enough. 

“Oh my here he does, look at this angel” Patton coos, tickling ever so carefully his stomach, the both allowing themselves a moment with each other. The sweetness the child radiates is almost too much for Patton's weak heart.  Soon enough everyone cycled in for their reunion. Logan stood protective by Patton the entire time, a hand on his shoulder and love infecting him. Patton was grateful. 

The twins were impatient and they had every right to be, spending almost three hours with their father and Logan simply chatting away. Patton loved it,he loved cuddling Valerie while Remus explained his journeys, he loved Remus fiddling with his hair as Valerie recounted their days with Logan. And most of all he loved Logan. He loved that he got to share this with someone, someone who cared someone who he loved and who loved him back. 

Soon enough the room darkened and Roman, after a copious check up and a thorough conversation volunteered to take them home for some rest. 

“You are truly my hero” Patton teases, knowing that title was held by only one person. One person who was currently making sure the children were bundled up before they said their goodbyes. Roman gave him one last squeeze before leading them out followed by James who waves the door closed. 

“You look exhausted” Logan notices, fluffing up Patton's pillow, making sure the lawyer remains cozy and comfortable. Patton takes his cheeks as he leans in and plants a quick kiss on him. He pulls away, getting prepared to take his sleep, Logan smiles timidly planting a kiss on his head before finally releasing his overbearing care. Not that Patton minds. Logan sets up in the chair next to him, turning the night light on and flipping quietly through a book. 

It remains peaceful and still for awhile, Logan almost dozes off with his blanket sprawled around him. But as the clock strikes eleven thirty, the door slides open. And of course panic sets in, why were the doctors here and so late at night? But when the gruff boots and purple jacket reflected on the light, Logans panic set in even more.

“Virgil” Logan identifies in a whisper, the detective meets his eyes. The bags are prominent. But his boiling hatred was fiery. “He's sleeping” Logan scolds, folding up his blanket and putting the book on the shelf. “Where were you all day?” Logan goes, quickly back tracking. “Actually no, I don't care” 

“Lo be nice” Patton mumbles through his pillow, the pair jump and Logan joins his side quickly. He wipes his eyes sitting up, allowing Logan to serve him water, taking it gratefully. Virgil wants to come forward, his head pulsed as his eyes laid on Patton. He missed him so much, but Logans glare stopped him. “Thank you starlight” Patton put his glass back, and Virgil adored the casualness of their physical connection, the nicknames and the fact that Logans and Pattons hands were connected. But he hated that he couldn't enjoy this right now. “Heya Virge” Patton swallows, something forced down. 

“Pat..” Virgil breathes, he wants to gush but something holds him back. Patton bit his lower lip, he extended his arms, motioning for Virgil to come forth. The breath that escaped Virgil lifted the pressure from his chest. 

“Patton no” Logan reminds, he doesn't mean to be controlling but he cares for Patton more than he can describe.

“Logan come on” Virgil sighs. Patton clutches his blankets knowing hes only doing this out of confrontation and his fear of such. But with what Logan told him...shouldn't he be mad?

He was

He was painfully hurt

“What did you tell him?” Virgil points as Patton refocuses. 

“The honest truth and what I found Patton should know” Logan explains. Patton takes his hand, feeling the sweat build. Logan takes the signal and finds himself breathing with relaxation. “You took the money, you and Remy took the money” He lays out flat. “When Patton came to you about Liam you should have done something” Logan spits “Instead, like everyone else in that goddamn precinct you took Liams vile money and kept your mouth shut” Logan reveals, Virgil averts  his guilty eyes. Patton twinges, clasping tighter to Logan. 

“Patton let me just..I…” Virgil feels something clamp tight in his throat. He has an explanation but nothing worth Patton's forgiveness. “You said you h-had a plan and you were gonna leave i thought, its just a little longer and Damian and I-”

“Virgil are you fucking kidding?” Logans voice remains quiet but it seethes, Patton struggles but sits up pulling Logan closer to him. 

“Dearest, language” He whispers sweetly, wiping the sweat away from Logans hot head. “Its ok, I'm okay and you're okay and the twins and Damian and virge...everyones ok” Patton rambles, Logan softens at the soft breaths he takes. Idiot, he punishes. Patton was tired, he was shaking ever so slightly. 

“Im so sorry Pat, I should go” And he does, Virgil gives him one more apologetic look before slamming the door away. Patton releases an exasperated breath before falling back into his pillow. How many times was he going to cry today?

“Love?” Logan sits with him, Patton cant conjure up words he simply shakes his head, the tears flow. Logan adjusts so he cradles Patton, a gentle lullaby his hummed to him as he remembers every time a touch had never felt so loving, and filled with pain instead. “I love you so very much” He promises, he was so glad Patton took that from him. 

I dont think Id want to give that to anyone else

Soon enough, the pair was comfortably asleep, both with dreams...or nightmares of their own. But together, and surely they wouldn't let the other be hurt, not again, not ever again.   

#objection au #logicality #prinxiety #remile #demus #Logan sanders #patton sanders #roman sanders #Thomas sanders #deceit sanders #remus sanders #virgil sanders #remy sanders #emile picani #writing #write #ao3 #archive of our own #ocs #sanders sides #youtube

[wolferals]

WAKE UP CALL**

again a collaboration with my wonderful friend @bbaronpiper ❤️❤️

Both of us wrote half of the story, i hope you like it. And definitely check out her writings!🌸

arón piper imagine

*

*

steffi/@bbaronpiper:

7:30 am. Your eyes shot open at the sound of your alarm you turned it off quickly but you still heard a low groan coming from the other side of the bed. You felt Arón stir a little but refused to open his eyes. You turn to face him and run a finger on his cheek. Savoring the few moments you have with your boyfriend. You slept last night without him. He was out partying with his friends. Again. You didn't have a problem with it at first because you swore you'll never be that type of girlfriend who controls and forbid their man on the things they want to do. Until recently, it became a habit of his.

"Morning, Baby" His voice was low and husky. ​

You smiled at him in return, scooting closer. "Slept well?"

"Si" He said while rubbing his eyes. "Partying after spending whole day on set isn't easy"

You bit the insides of your cheek to stop you from spitting the words. Arón must have noticed this since he then turned to lie on his back and exhales. Leaving your hand that was on his cheek to fall on his shoulder. "Do you have something to say Y/N?"

You leaned on your elbow trying to get him to look at you. Your hands travelled down to his chest "Don't you think you've been partying a lot lately?"

"Mmm dont think so.." he shrugged still not looking at you.

"You're barely home" you almost whispered not sure if you want to push this discussion.

"What do you mean Y/N? I'm always home" he then looked at you.

You were about to open your mouth to spill everything you've been feeling lately but then decided not to. He probably too tired for drama anyways.

"Come here" he motioned to you as he opened his arms. You complied and laid on his chest. "Te quiero." He lifted your chin up and look at you deeply. "Don't ever think otherwise. Even just for one second" stupid you, let your heart flutter at his words smiling up at him sweetly.

*

You splash cold water on your face to snap you out of your thoughts. You stare at yourself in the mirror and saw your red and puffy eyes. You kept staring blinking rapidly trying to stop the tears from forming. You stood there for what felt like years before wiping your face with a clean towel. You held your breath one last time, tightly shut your eyes only to open them again, exhale and went out of the bathroom and into your shared bedroom.

2:40 am and he's still not home. Why are you not surprised?

It was so obvious. Looking back now, you felt like a complete idiot blindsided by love. You should've seen it coming when he gave you that smile that didn't reach his eyes anymore, the way your lips touched and moved in sync but the desire to have you was gone.

"Bet you couldn't last a day without fucking me" you laughed as you teased him. You two just finished fucking and were now watching a movie when his hands travelled up to your thighs again.

"Is that a challenge?" he raised an eyebrow.

"Nahh, just stating facts" you then got this brilliant idea to get back at him for all those times he made you beg and tease you. You straddled him, bury your face onto his neck softly gliding your lips against his skin while your finger trace against his bare chest. You wore nothing but an oversized shirt of his. Nothing underneath so you're pretty sure he felt how wet you are right now. Normally, this would work. Arón never declined sex.

"Bebe" you whispered to his ear seductively and nibbled on it after.

"Shhh!!! Here comes the best part!" his eyebrows furrowed as he pointed on the screen.

Oh this was gonna be hard. "So, you're saying, you wouldn't touch me even if I am naked?" he shrugged, his lips formed an inverted smile with his eyes still glued to the TV. You then took your shirt off. And you swore you heard a soft "damn" coming from him. You just wanted to mess with him, tease him but the feeling of his skin touching yours turned you on as you start grinding him through his boxers moaning close to his ear.

Nada. No emotions.

You sighed in frustration so you decided to take it to another level. You then turned your back at him leaning on his chest, you open your legs wide and draped your legs on his. You smirked as you can already feel his growing bulge against your ass.

"I hate to fuck myself but since my boyfriend's ignoring me.... Oh well" you announced as your hand gripped his leg and your other hand start to play with your clit. Rubbing small circles and moaning softly at first. You can feel him shifting underneath you. you were surprised when he grabbed your waist and push you off of him and sat you on the side.

"Yo.. you're b-blocking the view,Y/N" he said uneasy. His hands gripped his thigh and bit his lower lip way too hard for you not to know he's about to give in.

You scoffed at him "Oh it's on!" you then place your left leg again on his right one and start to rub your clit faster than before making you moan so loud saying things like "Ohhh baby..." "Si, Arooonnn, si!" you're so wet it made it easier to switch from rubbing your clit into inserting two fingers inside you. your other hand then reached for his growing bulge. He refused to touch you but you definitely wouldn't refuse to touch him. You started palming him as you pleasure yourself earning a low growl from him. "Let me ride you baby"

You then suddenly felt his hand over yours, the one you had on your pussy and jerk it. "You drive me crazy"

sara/me:

He managed to push you away a little so he could finally flip you both over so he was now on top.

Smirking down at you he pulled down his pants, making his hard dick slap against his lower stomach.

„Open up."

You bit your lip and jerked your head back to give him easier access to hover over your face. Slowly he slid his dick in your welcoming mouth, making both of you moan out softly.

„Mhm just like that." he groaned and held onto the wall for support as you were sucking his tip seductively.

„Take it." he suddenly spoke and pushed his length into your mouth. It was always a little hard for you to fit all of him in your little mouth but he still made sure you were okay.

There was still a little space left so you nodded at him to tell him he could push his entire dick in your mouth.

„Dont want you to gag, u know that." he just mumbled but did as you told him and he slid his cock deeper.

„Ah fuck." he groaned and threw his head back in pleasure.

You could feel tears building up, he seemed to notice too because he pulled out completely. You swallowed and took a deep breath. „You good?" he spoke but you just replied by bringing his tip back to your lips.

„Mh good girl." he moaned out as you kitten licked his tip.

„On your stomach babygirl." he groaned after you had sucked on his tip for a bit.

He got off of you and stood up to get a condom from the drawer.

Meanwhile you lied down on your naked stomach and waited for him.

„Open your legs for papi." he growled as you felt a harsh smack on your left ass cheek. That made you moan out in pain but it also felt good. It wasnt hardcore pain, but you did know it would leave a spot.

You opened your legs and lifted your hips up a little.

„Yes good." you heard his deep voice behind you.

Arón grabbed a pillow and placed it under your hips for support. „Ready for my cock honey?" he asked.

„Yes papi." you moaned as a response before he slowly slid his hard cock into your trembling pussy. „Ah fuck you're always so tight." he whispered and grabbed your hips roughly.

Without hesitation he started slamming into you as if there was no tomorrow. With harsh thrusts he kept hitting your g-spot, making your eyes roll back and your mouth fall open.

Arón was moaning loudly as you could already feel him getting closer.

He changed his angle a little by aiming higher, laying down on your butt.

„Babe." he growled and suddenly grabbed you by your hair.

He he never done that before.

And he knew you didnt like it since your head was sensitive.

But that moment you were so turned on, you didnt even think of stopping his actions.

Arón fucked you roughly and fast while you were moaning out his name or cursed. You could hear him panting against your back.

„Im coming baby." he groaned and slammed into you with no mercy. You couldnt keep it any longer either.

Two last thrusts and he had you coming for him. Your body started shaking as your orgasm went through your body like lightening.

„Yes baby come on." he smacked your butt once again until he came as well. „Fuck yes." he almost screamed and jerked your head up on your hair.

It hurt but you were too concentrated on your own orgasm you didnt realize.

Your back was up against his chest while his cock was twitching in you, spilling his cum into the condom.

„Ah fuck." he breathed out as he calmed down from his intense orgasm.

You were pretty exhausted too and just expected him to cuddle you and finish the movie but he suddenly whispered:"On your back."

You were confused but followed his commands and lied down.

„Put your arms behind your back. No touching until I come back."

By nodding you agreed and he left the room without saying any more.

You waited patiently for him to come back and it was really hard not to touch yourself. You just came, yes, but your clit hadnt gotten any of his attention yet. And usually he ate you out before sex or at least rubbed your clit while he was fucking you.

It took him about 5 minutes to finally return to the bedroom, he was now wearing jeans, but his upper body was still exposed.

„Did you touch yourself baby?"

You shook your head truthfully and spoke:"No I didnt."

-„Promise?" he asked and stood in front of the bed looking at you.

„I promise daddy."

He nodded and finally climbed inbetween your legs.

„Good girl."

He spread your legs carefully before finally attaching his lips to your thighs, placing soft kisses everywhere.

This boy could really fuck you rough and tell you you're his baby a second later.

Your hands were still behind your back, just as he had told you to, while his tongue was tracing circles on your thighs and lower stomach.

„Arón." you moaned out, seeking pleasure.

He loved being called daddy or papi, but hearing you say his name was his biggest turn on. He loved your voice, and when it said his given name he got reminded how much he loves you really.

„You sure you deserve this for being such a bitch to me before?" he played.

„Arón please." you exclaimed and looked down at him.

He was just laying there, looking up at you, no part of his body touching yours anymore.

„You know what. Nah. Maybe tomorrow."

[pbandjesse]

I dont feel so great right now. Belly hurts. But today wasnt a bad day. Just kind of emotionally draining. 

I did not sleep well. I woke up because I had a terrible nightmare. But I was so exhausted and upset I got up to go get a hug from James and then went back to bed for an hour. It wasnt the best way to start the day. 

But when I got up for real James made crepes. And I was okay. I got dressed and felt cute.

Last night I had gotten my new glossier box and they accidentally sent me someone elses order, along with my own. So I emailed them and they said I could keep it. So I got to try some products I hadnt gotten before. Their mascara is really nice! Light. And the cloud paint blush is really natural and I like it a lot. Nice little present from the universe. 

We headed out a little before 10 to go to REI to pick up my new shoes. It was a nice drive out. A really pretty day today. We got out there and I followed the instructions and then my shoes were in the trunk and off to the grocery store we went. I wouldnt open the box until after we got food and they are awesome. They are not slip ons, the photo was deceiving. But they are perfect for camp beyond that. I ordered elastic laces so I can make them into slip ons but in the meantime they are great and I am excited about them. Also they are very comfy. 

But before that we went over to the grocery store. It was the first time weve shopped together in a long time. It was nice to do it together. We got almost everything we wanted. It was a nice time. 

An old man, a vietnam vet, called me a "painted lady". And we had some good banter. We ended up behind him in line and he was struggling with the machine but I was enjoying him. He had great silly old man cometary. Didnt love when he said they should have just bombed the vietcong but you cant win them all, and we lost Vietnam so you know?

We started to head home. And we were like 2 exits from home when traffic came to a standstill. We thought maybe it was protests but it ended up being a fatal car accident. 

We were stuck on the highway for about an hour and a half. Thankfully we had drinks and a charger. We listened to podcasts and tried not to stress to much. I was more stressed because I had my intake for therapy today and I didnt want to miss it.  I was also annoyed that the cops were doing their job and trying to direct people to turn around to go back to the other exit. Like it was ridiculous. Finally James just said fuck it and we drove the wrong way down the highway. We made it off the highway though and had a lot of traffic from people having to avoid 83. But we made it home a little before noon. 

We put things away. I tried on my new shoes. I had a snack. And I got ready for my virtual appointment .James left to go on a bike ride so I could be alone. And then I just waited. 

The doctor was a couple minutes late but we made it up on the other end. It was kind of nice to just run through my history with her. Her name is Rachel and she was very kind. I had to keep myself from like. Blabbing to much because this was just intake. But it was good. She didnt have a for sure appointment for me until the end of july but I am also on the waitlist so well see what happens I suppose. Im trying at least. 

Once I was done with that I felt pretty drained. James was home. I went and bothered him. We did a little cleaning. I cleaned the fish tank a bit. We had a late lunch. James made me hardboiled eggs for my salad. He had never hardboiled an egg before. They came out good! 

I took a half hearted nap where I most just scrolled on my phone. And then we ordered sushi and dumplings for dinner. 

They came around 7. It was a really nice dinner. We watched some videos together. And then he had a video game meet up with his friends. Im glad he has that with his buddies. 

I spent the next hour texting with Jess while I sorted through my stored makeup. I have realized that I dont want most of it. I just want to pair it all down. Get rid of the old stuff that smells. And while it feels way to wasteful to throw it away today, I did put it all in a bag and now I only have my daily makeup, a couple back ups, and then like fancy stuff for fancy days. And glitter. Felt good to sort. And now Im washing all the makeup brushes Im keeping. And hanging out with sweetP. Listening to James yelling about video games from the other room. 

Im going to go finish cleaning my brushes. I hope you guys have a good night. And a good day tomorrow. Be safe. 

[order-progress]

I used to have a really entitled outlook on life. In my mind though, I was entitled to my thought processes because it was where my mind existed in the place having had come from a once far more turbulent era. Back then I didn't question things that werent outwardly obvious. I didnt question the unremarkable identities of things that exhibited no distinctions amongst one another. Life was a stream of experience, and I just did the best of choices I decided to arrange, or really actually, more like shuffle choices into a messy pile and pat myself in the back cause I could squint at it my mismatched pile of non related events and not feel guilty for putting off routine, structure and goals.

I guess it isnt so surprising to anticipate that like all my other experiences, disicpline would present itself when and if I needed it to be summoned out of wherever creative and yet very hard to imagine location i would imagine it arriving at some future, ambiguous date, just in time to make no work look like fancier no work and with ribbons on it.

Something very common happened to me, something that is happinning right now all around the world, no matter how many days, or years after i first posted this here.

My boyfriend broke up with me.

I wore my entitlement pretty high that day, because somehow, despite there having been no carefully executed plan made on ky end--some masterpiece scheme of genius where one could really see there existed some reasonable and healthy attention to tackle to fucking problem.

Nope. My mother fucking entitled ass decided id actually be shocked. Not even fake shocked. Thats how you know you have lost touch with your surroundings, because big things happen in your wake..while your awake and yet somehow your stuck on who killed the butler in the library with the candle stick.

What makes this one of the most significant event despite its occurance being fairly common globaly, is that his presence had caused me to become more aware of more of the things I would have otherwise taken in stride, none of these events were remarkable on their own, but collectivelly, I had inadvertantly cleaned up my mindspace to find neatly organized clusters of thoughts no longer blending into the subconcious like 70's urban grafitti.

I didnt hold that moment to some disporportionately skewed sugar coating scale just to get ribbons on them after they were organized,I just acknowledged them, like a breath,where as before, they were simply obstacles or pit stops that would perpetuate the chronic attention deficit I had welcomed into my head. I like to think of ADD as the worlds most innefective street sweepers, they sweep alright, but they just make a bigger mess and then you got things in places they have no business being in.

I was in a place of low self worth because of an accumulated collection of short lived and half assed adventures, disastrous endeavers and the nefarious presence of something so obscured, so black and forboding, made me avoid certain places for simply not wanting to deal with the house keeping it wouldve required to mitigate its destructive intentions.

I kept myself busy to not force the acknowledgent that this would become a source of not only my insecuruties, but then in addition to its ever increasing interconnectedness, its complexity. Its chambers that hardened like a mystical kight of armor, whose drawers were full of destructive objects and thoughts that rattled in their confinement as a means of foreshadowing something so sinister, I could not then yet fathom the destrutive ways its icy talons would engulf and twist into my everyday life simply to create chaos, and it didnt register that this was a problem because amidst this battle royale of fragments and bits of poorly put together patterns, Francisco's presense was a light whose emimation lulled me into a complacecy I hadnt anticipated

It wasnt that in this period, that I conciously made a decision to disregard the growing issue, it was the novelty of being in a loving, beautiful and mature relationship with someone that as each day grew, so did my conviction that this person was becoming the brightest fixture in an ever cramped confined hallway of possibilities.

As I stood there aware of this moment, feeling a satisfaction and a gratitude I had never felt before, I realized that I had come so far on autopilot, it was a move that was almost instinctual, I rolled my sleeves up, put on the rocky theme song, got my gym bag ready, went and bought like every stupid unessecary stupid trinket shit people buy to feel like their getting a handle and a good start on some shit, but really it just becomes the infuriating bag of junk that is now the obstacle between you and the door handle to exit your car and actually start your project.

I felt a sense of urgency, I saw how unequipped I had been and while I was and it was this moment that taught me how much I loved him. I reckognized that somehow I was one of those fucking weirdos that jumped through those seedy ass short cut type scenarios in life to give you the same effect of the real thing in less the time, kind of like a GED vs high school diploma, or plan b instead of condoms.

I recognized that there was an innate element of unneccesary risk involved in many of my accomplishments. The risk was usually always a concious decision that I would accept a certain amount of totally unnecessary consequences that typically would define the life of those people who you catch specific glimpses of in mysterious times like dawn or dusk. And be like..yea i could totally see that guy having to figure out what to do with the llama he inherited as a result of some gamble.

This was no longer an acceptable risk. It wasnt that i thought it was dangerous or scare him away, its that I am not the kind of man that wakes up and sees the problems his factory has and finally knows how to fix it and then just be okay with going to bed and put it off.

This is where I get annoyed again. I knew that I wasnt capable of actively doing something against him, because we both agreed on things, and also neither of us was completely high as fucking kite on methamphetamines while operating a forklift to tune a paino yet.

I couldnt ever feel bad about atheletes who ugly cried after being disqualified for juicing to get an unfair advantage in the sports world.

Yet once again my overwhelming confidence, my lovable man mentality of "fuck a map or tools you got grit, spit and teeth". Prevailed.

Im mad because it was this moment right here. In a sea of me being happy to grow and learn and doing the rignt thing. I saw a place i overlooked, its presence was almost like a marker that there were many other areas i needed to work on, and i got sad.

I didnt feel good enough. I felt like a mess. I felt dissapointed at the pride in nothing I had taken so many times. I was finally proud of the changes i was making again, only to be reminded in a very real way of how I never had structure, never had a fail safe implemented effectively to instead of adopting either anxiety or no fucks about an event that could have been in my power to mitigate, i either didnt even notice I missed it, or didnt care.

As I started seeing the mountain of work I had to do, I wondered what it meant about how effectively i could handle other things moving forward, it was an irrational fear that I had that I would dissapoint him because I wanted us to be happy. But i am an artistic person, people who work with details to make a larger picture learn early on how to work details, and I never evaluated just how shoddy my altertanitive crash course was like getting PlAN B instead of putting a condom on.

I can handle pressure effectively. I can be okay with my decisions. What I cant do is open up a factory, see everything that was negelcted when I now know how to fix it, and then go to sleep like nothing bothered me.

I never in my life found myself in a place where i came face to face with old life and it made me feel sad or humilated. I felt like a fraud for just having gotten lucky that everytning worked out, while he worked hard.

I suddenly felt something I never experienced before, fear in love. The moment where you realize your not a piece of shit because you actually dont want to let someone down, the moment when you feel bad because you walked around in life with luck you didnt give a second thought to and passed it off as hard work. And here was this beautiful man, whose life was suffering and hard work, and you realized all of it at once, and there I was, eager fucking beaver captain america man of the house cause now i feel like a god damned engineer since i could assemble an ikea 3 piece wrench-back the fuck up motherfuckers.

I just felt humbled and i felt driven. I also felt the pressures rise up around me and I dont know why I couldnt look away from the sight of the realization of how id been. And its not like i did it all on purpose, but from that moment on, it was as if I had something to prove to myself that at that time I couldnt understand yet because I hadnt reflected yet. And as I was taking the scenic route on ways to "punish yourself is actually how we fucking motivate ourselves around here cus were fucking men" the bigger I created something inside me that wasnt ever there. And then as the places that I had been tendering to and growing in started to not be kept, pressure in my life at home happened. And for the first time in my entire life I was embarrassed at my life.

I remember the moment I felt it, my mom leaving me at work after I lost my car. I walked 2 miles in the cold because i was infuriated that I allowed another event I could have forseen to happen.

I never in my life reflected this intensley on my actions before. Having him in my life made me realize I had been holding myself to a higher standard because I am at my best when I when I am actively building towards something. I opened a place in me I never saw with those eyes and it hurt me. I tried to let him in, and to be honest, the insecurities of him seeing all that mortiified me..not because I would be seen as a slob or this or that, i was just dissapointed that I for a time during when I needed it the most in my early life, I wasnt necessarily taught healthy ways to do things. Mostly because I came to this country at 10, didnt know english, parents worked all the time until i was 16 and then dad got sick with brain cancer and we caught it after he had a seizure cause dad apperently loved moonlighting as my biggest fan when he would go reading my journal at night.

I didnt know how to explain it to francisco. I was feeling. New concept, i was feeling out of sync, i didnt understand why it hit me so hard. I was trying to look away and orient myself on the present.

I could have just dealt with that. But i suddenly felt raw and vulnerable. My boyfriend and I were getting into arguments because I just wanted us to be closer due to this need i didnt know how to vocalize about what I was going through, and he hesitated because he probably thought id leave him if i saw his dirty secrets.

That was the one thing he really never appreciated about my love. I just knew. If everything else was as evident ..like this feelings and where they came from and how to process them healthy while ...it just all got too much. I didnt know how to tell him what I needed. I just needed him.

I started to feel like i wasnt tethered to the focused areas I was so eager to work in. I just kept telling myself communication is key we will get through it.

Then I the drugs did something I didnt expect them to. They turned off this guilt and switch. They gave me the quiet to make them come down to a more manegeable place where I wasnt overwhelmed anymore.

Because I couldnt process this in words at the time, i didnt know how to express that to him. It led to me feeling guilty for not understanding why i enjoyed doing the drugs aside from the stimulant effect. When i tried to explain it to him, it was like trying to coin a cheesy motto for a doomed cereal commercial in french, basically everuthing sounded like something he had no understamding or could relate to.

I started feeling depressed because i could see that although from his perspective we were fighting..

I was even more frustrated becauese we werent fighting. I was pretty much crying, trying to tell him in french something he didnt understand while he was yelling at me in english about me not respecting him by not speaking english.

This was the worst fucking part. Because part of the issue that led me here was accountabiliyy and communication.

I kept telling him in the only way i knew how.please im sorry i know things are getting worse. But this isnt how we are.

I thought we could get through anything.

In his mind he saw a piece of something, he ignored my emotional attachment to it..and i mean i cant blame him, other people never quit.

But even in those moments i knew i wasnt going to be other people.

And suddenly i was alone. I was depressed. I had realized that it wasnt us that was th issue so i tried so hard to communicate more effectively that he got frustrated and said i talked in loops. I felt so alone because i understood his frustration and i just needed him to trust me. But that was the perfect storm when i just got so alone feeling from his inability to just not look at me how i felt at myself. And i honestly tried to fix it in the middle of him running away and the most painful thing was that he couldnt understand and i didnt know how to say it.

I dont blame him for leaving

But a part of me breaks to my very core to know that if he just literally lookrd at me like yes i was going crZy but i was just hurting and overwhelmed.

All i wanted and needed was him.

The worst. Pain was that he didnt see that.

And i needed to explain it. And he didnt let me.

I felt like i was desperatly trying to express something of real explaination. I just honestly was desperate to because he was running.

I