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#they’re literally everywhere and so annoying all the time I’m so sick
starlooove · 9 months
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Reading isn’t enough I need to start beating white ppls asses
#they’re literally everywhere and so annoying all the time I’m so sick#and it’s the quiet racism that’s killing me#ignoring dogwhistles pretending u don’t understand things that blk ppl are finding issue with gaslighting gaslighting gaslighting#and I get why ppl turn to the concept of religion and the idea that these people are gonna get what they deserve but what about now#what about the people they’re hurting and indoctrinating now#what about all the white folk who sit back and let it happen and feel comfortable in the fact that at least they’re not saying slurs#and laws keep getting passed that are literally getting us killed and y’all are making up that blk women are mad about kanekalon fuck y’all#And the LEAST you could do is sit and listen and learn but you need to share ur damn opinion on everything u hear and see#even when u know u don’t know shit#and don’t get me started on fandom it’s supposed to be fun here but y’all are so hyper focused on white characters that u genuinely don’t#see ur own racism#and some of you will see posts about it and scroll on and be guilty or think ur excluded#none of u are excluded this about all of u who make one post or reblog a few about fandom racism and go back to taking character traits from#nonwhite characters to make ur white faves look cooler#this is about everyone who thinks they’re some sort of feminist bc they think propping a female character on such a high pedestal nobody can#touch her isn’t falling into racist tropes at all#like sometimes I genuinely hate y’all so much it makes me sick#so tempted to tag every fandom tag I can find here#but y’all will either ignore it or gaslight blk ppl AGAIN like ALWAYS bc that’s what y’all do#dc#dc comics#tim Drake#bc anyone scrolling through this tag needs to see it I promise#Duke Thomas#Cass Caín#bc y’all pretend ur not racist towards her when y’all treat her like a walking dragon lady kys 💀#Damian Wayne#so sorry to Damian stans faced with ppl who can’t read 💔#and thats It.only main nonwhite ppl in batfam.and u still manage to be this racist.except Dick but u only sexualize him Abt it 💀#see how I turned to fandom to cope with the real shit and it still fucking sucks 💀 I hope some of y’all die genuinely
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shrimp-buffet · 2 months
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LARRY AND LAWRIE HEADCANNONS #2!!
Because holy crap the first one got so much positive attention- (again, headcannons after cut cuz I’m gonna yap for a sec)
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Thanks to everyone who enjoyed the first one! It’s my most popular post ever and I’m glad it was so well received. I really hope this is a good follow up! Feel free to let me know if you want more Brawl Stars headcannons going forward cuz I’d be happy to make them.
Anyway it’s finally headcannon time!
Larry focused, Lawrie focused, Both
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• Larry’s favorite music genre is literally elevator music (Lawrie likes rock!)
•Both of them hate the Cops theme song, they think it’s very annoying. Doesn’t help that park guest and other brawlers (*cough* Nita and Leon *cough*) tease them with it
• At first, Lawrie didn’t let Larry have a weapon since “they’re dangerous and you don’t need one” but Larry managed to craft his ticket wheel into an explosive weapon somehow and Lawrie was just too afraid/impressed to not let him have it
•They both live in the park’s security station. Specifically, Larry took an unused storage closet and made it into an actual little bedroom, while Lawrie just sleeps in their office (if they sleep at all)
•Lawrie collects bobble heads. They make him smile
•Larry really likes baking! Not to eat the sweet treats (since he can’t even if he wanted to), but he just loves the process of making them. He often bakes cookies with Pearl
•He has no clue that Pearl is related to the Gold Arm Gang somehow. They’ve seen her with them but it just somehow has never clicked and probably never will
•Lawrie does know, but they just think Pearl is harmless enough. The second any other Gold Arm member even gets close to Larry though, they’re ready to strike
•Larry is a hypochondriac even though he can’t even get sick. Lawrie is kinda similar, but they’re just a neat-freak. Either way, everywhere the two go is getting deep cleaned and disinfected
•Lawrie gets a ton of coloring books for R-T since they see R-T as like a little kid and don’t know what else to get them.
•Larry is really good at engineering, and makes elaborate “mouse trap” like contraptions to try and catch criminals. They also make little mini robots! Those don’t have any consciousness but he treat they like his children all the same
•Lawrie pretends they don’t like the little robots, but they will protect those little guys with their life if they have to
•Lawrie’s idea of “fun” is challenging Larry to little games that test their knowledge on all the parks rules (Don’t worry cuz Larry thinks it’s fun too)
•If you bring it up to them, both Larry and Lawrie the living embodiments of anti-smoking/drinking/gambling ads
•People will often sneak up behind Larry and put stickers on them to poke fun at him. He never notices until Lawrie takes them off. He keeps them in a sticker book because they think it means people like him
•No one puts any stickers on Lawrie because he’s just impossible to sneak up on and will punch someone if they try
•They own a cat! Larry found a little Calico kitten and went annoying little brother mode until Lawrie agreed to keep it
•Lawrie hated the idea of having an animal around, but much like a middle aged dad they’re now the one who spoils the cat the most
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That’s it for now! Hope you liked it and thanks for reading this!! Again, show some love if you’d like more!
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yuribalisms · 7 months
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I don’t think I’m gonna articulate this well but I am genuinely so tired of queer spaces treating lesbians like we’re insane when we complain about how male dominated quite literally everything is. I get it. I get a lot of people either are men (or something close) or are attracted to them so they don’t give a fuck/enjoy/benefit from literally everything being male dominated but not only do you not give a shit that this is a unique uncomfortableness and oppression that lesbians deal with, if we ever say that, you act like we’re fucking insane
I can’t pursue certain medical treatments I want “because what if my husband wants kids.” I watch men at my job every day make fun of their wives and tell them they’re not allowed to get things that make them happy and no one acts like this is horrible. It took me fucking forever to find a female tattoo artist and piercer because the field is so male dominated. Over 90% of upper management at my job is male and most of them have harassment claims against them which nothing comes up because it’s other men receiving these claims. Even “smaller” things like It’s damn near impossible to read or watch anything where 70-80% of the characters aren’t male. And if you do find media where most of the characters are women it’s written off/only take serious by other women.
Even ppl I know irl that I complain about this too huff and groan when I complain cuz and it’s like I GET IT!!! YOURE A GUY!!! YOURE ATTRACTED TO MEN!!!! You LIKE seeing men everywhere, you BENEFIT from there being men everywhere but can’t you even fucking pretend to care that these are issues
And I can’t even go into queer spaces and voice I’m upset by this without being bombarded by ppl saying shit like “well ppl get flak for being attracted to men all the time” or “but masculine ppl are ignored in the queer community too” and like STFU you are comparing lesbians saying shit like “I hate men” or making jokes about how it would suck to be attracted to them to an actual form of systematic oppression
And now I’m seeing ppl post shit about “misandry is real actually” and practically saying shit like “it’s okay to hate women and hate see them and looking at them uwu” and it is making me FUCKING CRAZY
I feel like I’m going insane. Am I going insane. It’s so so SO fucking male dominated EVERYWHERE and I can’t even point that out without a line of annoying ass mlm and trans guys going “MISANDRY IS REAL YOU ARE OPPRESSING ME BY TALKING ABOUT MISOGYNY” like am I losing it. I think I’m losing it
And like !!!!! I actively avoid men too!!! I don’t follow men 9 times out of 10. I refuse to see professionals who are men if I can help it. And I’m still getting fucking slammed with this shit
Please. Please. I’m so fucking tired. I never wanna see another man again for the rest of my fucking life and I never wanna see anyone who isn’t a lesbian or at least some form of sapphic act like this is an issue that gets blown out of proportion I’m so sick. I’m so tired. Oh my god
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flyingfishtailoutpost1 · 10 months
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I don’t wanna be a Bitchy Gardener but I have to rant for a sec and I apologize for all this but
I wish people could be goddamn normal about things for like a minute.
And by things I mean Things. Like fucking trees. And ducklings.
Was sitting in a waiting room with my daughter at the dentist surrounded by little kids, and a momma duck goes waddling by with a crowd of ducklings outside the window. Our town’s 50% canals, so they’re everywhere. All the little kids go nuts oohing at them, but the woman next to me makes this disgusted face and says, “Ugh, they crap on my driveway, I’m so sick of it, whenever I see a nest in my back yard I smash all the eggs.” My daughter and every other kid there who heard her were 😨😨😨😨 and she just went back to scrolling on her phone.
This happens to me ALL THE FUCKING TIME.
Iguanas are everywhere down here. They’re invasive. They’ll eat your garden. Yeah it’s a pain. They’re also silly as hell when they go running across the street. Anytime I’m driving with the kids and we see one booking it across the street, my son’s like “hey that’s a weird dog” and we all laugh because we can be NORMAL ABOUT THINGS. But I can’t say it to anyone else without getting a lecture on the fact that they’re INVASIVE and also BAD and EVIL because they’re ANNOYING. Suzy Izzard wanted to know “How do you have an evil herbivore?” Well, just annoy the hell of a south Florida suburbanite and poop on her driveway, I suppose.
I was working a Sierra Club event, doing talks about native plants and pollinators, and was having a discussion with someone else in the industry about the fact that iguanas don’t seem to want to eat natives. I said that’s a fab talking point for landscapers to get people to consider native landscaping and she shot me down because, she said, iguanas are so annoying we really can’t distract people away from killing them.
I mean, yes by all means we need population control, but in the meantime I have to worry about being shot when I’m on a clients property because people are taking their guns out after these things. I’ve literally walked into a clients yard and found him standing there with a rifle (NOT a pellet gun), trying to take pot shots at iguanas on his deck. I just turned around without a word and left, because I’ve said I’ll happily die with a watering can in my hand but I didn’t mean quite like that.
One of our neighbors had a pongam tree in their front yard, and it was GLORIOUS. It just looked like the platonic ideal of a tree. It was the thing fantasy tree nymph art is made of. I loved it. I mentioned to my boss once that it was beautiful, and got a ten minute lecture on the fact that it’s BAD. A BAD tree because it’s non-native. And also it robs 7-11s and mugs old ladies on the weekends I guess I don’t know it’s A FUCKING TREE. It cannot have morals. I KNOW it’s not native, it’s my job to know. But it’s pretty. It’s a pretty tree. I’m allowed to say “hey look at that pretty tree.”
Trees are morally neutral. Iguanas are morally neutral. DUCKLINGS are fucking morally neutral. They are not invasive specifically because they practice willful or premeditated malice.
But sure, I’ll stand on what used to be Everglades wetland, now drained and paved over for your gated community and listen to you whine about ducks pooping on your driveway. Sure.
You know who else is an invasive species? You are. Fucking bite me.
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olderthannetfic · 2 years
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It really fucking sucks not being part of the Fandomwide OTP ship because it’s literally everywhere and it’s really annoying. And the worst part is I’d probably be into it if it wasn’t constantly shoved in my face all the damn time.
I was talking to a friend the other day because I was having trouble planning a fic and I (for the most part) trust them to catch things I miss. I was trying to nail down the basics before moving on to the little details: “A does this. A does that. Because of this, this other thing happens.” A is the POV character so once I get their actions down, I can play around with the infinite possibilities of everyone else. To be specific, the inciting incident is that A and B have a falling out, and B is completely done with A. They don’t reconcile. Then B, by their own hand, disappears. When A revisits this scenario, knowing something bad is going to happen to B if left to their own devices, A does not fight B in their argument, and while B still hates A’s guts, B doesn’t disappear. They don’t reconcile here either; A accepts the consequence of pissing B off and leaves them alone. And B leaves A alone. That’s as far as I got on that relationship because it’s the only logical conclusion to me and I’m tired of the enemies to lovers bullshit that literally everyone has for them. Just let them be enemies, let them stay the fuck away from each other. PLEASE.
So I ask my friend cuz I got stuck on more plot points down the line, still trying to nail down A’s route in the story, and they go “Maybe B feels bad and comes to A’s defense when X and Y are talking shit about A [and mutual friend C]. Cuz no one messes with B’s bitches.” And I’m like... no. No, they’re done. B is DONE with A, dude. (For the record, I didn’t actually say that, I think I said “Idk maybe” cuz I didn’t want to just shut down their idea even if I vehemently disagreed.)
And then they said, “I 100% think B would let A join the friend group again. B would be a bitch about it, but they’d do it.”
And I 100% think they wouldn’t because I’m sick to death of these two needing to be together in any proximity because they exist in the same universe. Just let them never talk to each other again. Just let them stay distant. Just. Let them. Go. Let them mourn the loss of each other if they even care so much. Let them never think of the other again, except in passing, maybe.
It’s so obvious why they suggested it because this ONE ship and its ONE dynamic (enemies to lovers OO FUCKING WOO) has the fandom by the balls and it’s shoving those balls into the mouths of everyone who wants to consume any content in this god forsaken fandom. I’m so TIRED of it. Everything turns into “how can we make it about A/B?” all the time. Even if it’s not for shipping purposes (there’s not many A&B fics cuz A/B is so prominent) people expect them to have some interaction and it’s like... or they can not. There are other characters, and other ships, you know. Jesus.
It’s so goddamn annoying if it’s not A/B it won’t get much engagement. I refuse to put that in my story cuz it’s not like the fandom is running out of it. I’m not even necessarily against it, I’m just against the oversaturation of it. I don’t need to contribute to the pile of A/B fics out there, there’s MORE than enough.
And the stupid thing is I want to like it. I thought I did. I want to be a part of the majority for once. But I’m not. And I probably will never be. Why bother putting shit out there when no one is going to read it because it doesn’t have their precious A/B ship? Like they need more. It’s everywhere. Share some of the space, will ya? Not everything is about enemies-to-lovers A/B shit.
Also I need to stop going to that friend when I’m stuck. Sometimes they can’t help, which is fine. Sometimes they say insensitive or outright ignorant things, and that’s not so fine. And ofc we don’t agree on things, which is always going to be fine. This is just the straw that broke the camel’s back.
--
TBH, I'm not surprised they reacted like this if you spent so much time A-B interaction in the outline. If that's the relationship you've portrayed as being emotionally interesting, that's what someone's going to fixate on in giving you advice.
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biisexualemma · 3 years
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boys ain't shit. oscar diaz
word count: 2.2k
warnings: swearing, lots of just angst and angry feminist energy and if this doesn't align with your beliefs, feel free to leave!
requested: 'Hey!! First I want to say that you are an amazing writer so talented! So I was wondering if I could request and imagine with spookyxreader and she overhears Oscar speaking about her or something like maybe she is to clingy or anything you think will fit and then she sort of starts to leave him alone does t opposite of what she heard he doesn't like drifts a little he sees the change questions her and she tells him why- and so angst to fluff If you hate please disregard And thanks anyway ❤️'
a/n: thank you for this lovely request, i only apologise that it took me so long to write! but i'm also glad it did because i kept re-writing this over and over again and it never came out right, but i really love this version! i changed it slightly from the request lol i was listening to 'your power' by billie eilish on a loop while writing this and a lot of anger and preaching came out-- oop-- but also not mad about it. i really like this and hope you do too! enjoy 🤍
on my block masterlist / main masterlist
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anger bubbled in your chest but your cheeks were flushed pink with embarrassment. your stomach lurched, a mixture of emotions swirling through you. you were angry at him for being such an asshole, but mostly you were embarrassed that you'd found yourself in this position and hurt that he would think to treat you like this. he was an asshole, he always had been, you knew it before you started dating but, somehow, he still managed to worm his way in. mainly because when you were alone he was careful, and sweet, and kind. he cared about you, he told you any chance he got, and you believed him. you were always convinced he meant everything he said, which is why this stung all the more.
"nah, it ain't even like that— she's everywhere man, how you s'posed to shake a hyna like that?" their laughter rang through your ears as you stood, feet frozen in place, out of sight to them. "shit's ridiculous. she's always on top of me."
"man— if i had a hyna that fine on top o' me all the time—"
"the things i'd do—"
you shook your head, blocking out their vulgar comments and trying to rid of oscar's shrewd laughter filling your ears. you were sick to your stomach hearing him talk about you like that, to hear him encouraging his friends crude jokes about you.
you couldn't stop yourself as the small scoff left your lips, catching one of the boys' attention. sad eyes, his smile faltering when he spotted you tucked around the side of the house, listening to every word. "shit," you heard him mumble, nudging oscar whose back was facing you.
oscar always had a thing about keeping up his reputation, which you understood, to some extent, but this had nothing to do with that. this was his friends, talking about you as if you were an object to satisfy their needs. and he was encouraging them. this was you they were talking about, when he claimed to love you.
this wasn't a side to oscar you ever wanted to see, or believe existed. you knew how his friends could be, but to hear him condoning the shit coming out of his friends mouths, made you feel unbelievably uncomfortable.
not to even mention that he was being downright mean, and sleazy in talking about you. you could feel your anger growing the longer you stood there. oscar glanced over his shoulder, his face falling when his eyes met yours. your hands clenched into fists, biting down on the inside of your cheek.
you shook your head, finally knocked out of your state of shock, turning and stomping away from the group of santos. your breathing grew heavier, sweat dripping off you as the sweltering heat started to get to you. you were so angry you could cry. you trusted oscar with everything, it took you a long time to get to that point, and this is how he treated you.
you could hear his muffled calls from behind you getting louder as you continued to march away from the house. you yanked your wrist away when you felt his hand latch onto you, and carried on your walk home.
he sped up, jogging so he stopped dead in front of you, holding out his hands when you tried to manoeuvre around him. "i don't wanna talk to you right now," you spoke calmly, trying again to move past him, his hands latching onto your shoulders to keep you still.
"just— hang on will you—"
you shook your head repeatedly. "no—"
"i don't know what you heard but—" his grip tightened when you tried to wriggle free.
"no," you repeated harsher.
"y/n— c'mon— that was nothing—"
"oscar," you raised your voice, cutting off his ramblings. his eyes never left your face, his eyebrows unknitting when your frown deepened. he scrunched his eyes shut for a second, frustrated he'd upset you. he was annoyed with himself for being so stupid. "no," you repeated once more. his hands slowly released their grip on you, letting you walk passed him. you heard his curse under his breath, walking away from him.
you felt your lip quiver, a lump now growing in your throat as your anger turned into heartache. you weren't sure you wanted to forgive him. but, for now at least, you were going to give him exactly what he wanted. space.
-
hours later and you were stood in the middle of a crowded party, your teeth clenched around the rim of a red solo cup, biting nervously. you hadn't wanted to come, you would much rather have been at home with a pint of ice cream. but your friend convinced you that getting out of the house tonight would be better for you than wasting away your life thinking about boys and eating ice cream. so far, you weren't so sure she was right.
you'd lost count the amount of times you'd heard loosen up and, you should smile more, thrown at you tonight. you weren't in the right headspace to be surrounded by people who were drunk out of their mind, constantly telling you to cheer up. you wanted to shout out to the entire party, fuck off, so everyone would know to just leave you alone.
so when you spotted his familiar face across the room, having just entered the party, you almost lost it. "no," you muttered to yourself. "not happening," you shook your head. he had been exactly what you came here to get away from. you let out frustrated sigh, shoving your cup into your friends hand and pushing yourself out of the crowd of people.
you hoped to god that oscar hadn't spotted you. you could not hash this out with him right now, that pint of ice cream in your freezer at home was calling your name, and you were ready to claim it.
"fuck me," you felt a hand graze the small of your back. you shivered away from the unwanted touch, turning with a deep-set frown on your face, towards the stranger who'd touched you. "you're hot when you're angry like that—"
"i'm also a fucking psycho when i'm angry so back off," you spat harshly, pushing away the hand he held lingering on your skin. "and don't touch me again," the man backed up, his hands held up in front of him. you huffed, continuing to the exit.
you wrapped your arms around yourself as the cool night air hit your bare skin. you'd left your jacket inside, turning to retrieve it, you saw oscar walking right at you. deciding it wasn't worth the effort, you left, you'd rather freeze than have a conversation with him right now.
"i know you hate me," you heard him call from behind you, his pace quickening as he tried to catch up with you. "but you can't walk home by yourself."
you ignored him, hastening your walk so you didn't have to do this with him. you knew he was right, you knew how incautious you were being walking home late at night alone. but you also desperately wanted nothing to do with him right now.
"ma," you shook your head, trying not to lose it on him in the middle of the street. "c'mon—"
"no— you c'mon oscar," you halted your stride, not able to ignore him any longer. you might as well get it out of your system if he was going to keep persisting. "i have had it with men today. i never wanted to have to include you in that."
he ducked his head, a crease forming between his eyebrows you noticed now you'd stopped to look over him. his eyes rolled, letting out a heavy sigh he'd clearly been holding in for a while.
"c'mon," he tilted his gaze away from yours for a second, trying not to cave under your stare. "you know what the santos are like— it's not my job to keep 'em in check."
"it is when it's me they're talking about," you gritted your teeth, looking at him in disbelief. you'd expected that this was how the conversation was going to go down. which is exactly why you tried to avoid it, you simply didn't have the energy to stand here and explain basic human decency to him. "not to mention— it is literally your job. you run the santos."
"it's not that simple," he ran his hand over his face, taking a small step closer to you. his eyes meeting with yours, begging you not to run off again as he held out a cautious hand towards you. "they didn't mean anythin' by what they said— you think if they did i'd let them 'in an inch of you?"
"you're perpetuating a violent cycle of sexism and objectification by letting your friends talk about any girl like that," you felt your throat tighten, tears had, at some point, welled in your eyes. "and that's not even mentioning what you said about me."
he closed his eyes for a second, his hand dropping back to his side. he turned away from you for a moment, releasing a deep breath he'd been holding. "i didn't mean it," he shook his head, swinging round to face you again. his brown eyes, that you'd always been a sucker for, were literally boring into you. if you hadn't been so angry you would've done anything for him. "i wasn't thinking and i never thought you'd ever hear—"
"that makes it ok then?" you frowned, eyes narrowing at him. "god knows what else you've said about me when i haven't been around to hear it," you scoffed, crossing your arms over your chest, trying to keep up your appearance despite the tears threatening to fall.
"s'not what i meant," he threw is arms up in frustration. he had, in all honesty, been talking without thinking about what he was saying. he was tired and stressed about how stretched out his time was at the moment. he was taking on more and more work, and therefore, more and more stress and he wasn't dealing with it well. he clenched his jaw when you sniffled, wiping under your nose with the back of your hand. his eyelids drooped. "nena.."
"i just, don't get it," you let out a shaky breath, holding out your hands to stop him moving any closer to you. "if i was being too much, all you had to do was say."
his chest tightened hearing you talk about yourself like that. he shook his head, trying again to reach out to you but you only stepped further away. "you're not too much," he spoke quieter this time. oscar loved you, more than he'd ever loved a girl before, that much was true. he might be bad at showing it sometimes, maybe he let his frustration get the better of him a lot, and maybe he didn't simply tell you enough how much you meant to him. but he loved you, much more than you were aware of.
"then why would you say it?" your voice was soft, breaking when you spoke again. exhaustion was starting to get the better of the both of you. you didn't want to fight with him, you just couldn't get his words out of your head. why would he say it if he didn't mean it?
"it's not you," he reiterated, his lips pursed. he used his forefinger and thumb to unknit the crease between his brows. "it's everything else. with cesar fucking around, shit with the prophets, cuchillos— and then you," he ducked his head, pressing the palm of his hand into his forehead. "i don't know how to manage everything and make time for you."
"why didn't you just tell me?" your features softened, eyes watching him move under your stare. "it's what i'm here for."
he scrunched up his nose, shrugging. "i don't want you involved in santos business," you understood more than you did five minutes ago, but you were still holding yourself back.
"i'm already involved, oscar, it's too late for that," this caught his attention, his brown eyes focused on yours again. you weakened a little. "but if you would just talk to me instead of keeping everything to yourself, maybe we wouldn't be in this situation right now."
he nodded faintly, almost uncertain of where you were taking this conversation. last thing he wanted was to lose you because of something so stupid on his end. he reached out, you letting him come close enough now so he could take hold of your hands in his. he gave your hand a gentle squeeze, tugging you closer.
"you know, i love you," you mumbled now he was only inches away from you. "i don't wanna do this again so talk to me, please."
he nodded again, giving your hand another squeeze of reassurance. "i'll try," the way his brown eyes stuck to you made you believe he meant what he said. "i'll do better. promise. i'll keep the santos in check, too. you don't need to worry."
you sunk into his chest, letting him engulf you in a tight hug. you released a shaky breath of relief. his arms wrapped around you, your face squashed against his chest and your arms tightened around his torso. "love you, too, by the way," he mumbled, his mouth pressed into your head of hair. "so much."
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pastxlscorp · 3 years
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Tokrev bfs taking care of their s/o when they’re sick
Featuring: Chifuyu, Mitsuya, Mikey, and Draken
Chifuyu:
100% will get sick with them because he’s a fucking lovable dumbass
Slurping soup while watching their favorite show
Fangirling over manga chapters together
Tissue boxes. Everywhere.
Their friends come over to see them cuddling on the couch wrapped in a blanket bc they’re both sick and don’t give a fuck
Catching up on schoolwork together, both wondering how they missed so much
Actually both take medicine but relish in suffering together
Spend the whole time quarantining and trying new recipes and cooking, mainly being geeks abt manga though
Mitsuya
Takes care of them but tries not to risk himself too much, not for his sake but the sake of his sisters
When he’s not busy with the gang or his sisters, he comes over with his homework and does it as they're napping or dying
Absolutely the type of bf to leave their s/o on read as they rush their way over, making their s/o sit there like “this b**** didn’t reply?”
Massages to make them feel better, even something simple like rubbing their back
ALWAYS comes over with medicine, homemade food; and something to cheer them up like a really corny movie or their favorite book. Will literally even sit down to play video games with them if it’ll make them happy (not really a game kinda person).
He calls his sisters who ask him how his s/o, when they reply they get really happy and excited, asking when’s the next time they can play.
If he’s busy, will still come over to drop off food, medicine, n whatever else he brought. Knocks on the door mad hard and smiles when they open. The type of mf to knock so loud and hard just to annoy their s/o bc he loves seeing them angry.
REALLY upset when he can’t kiss them or anything. Will try to kiss on the cheek before dropping off their stuff only to be turned down and he gets all childish like “You serious? Not even on the cheek?”
I think he’d be the most mature pettiest asshole here. You don’t give him ANY physical love, even something as simple as a hand hold, he will be so petty the next time he drops off homework.
He’ll be sitting there on the couch doing his homework and they’ll be reaching for him because they’re lonely and he’s just like “Oh, you want a hug? That’s too bad, I’m quite busy.” with the straightest face until they’re begging for a hug and then he’s finally like “maybe I can spare a minute.”
Tucks you in for bed and leaves you with a goodnight kiss, box of tissues, and a plushie.
Best solution: don’t engage when he’s being petty. Ends up getting tired of his isolation and ends up being the one to crack first.
Mikey:
Draken refuses to let him skip for his s/o, mainly because school is SOOO important to him and Mikey is his best friend
Does his best to stay awake till the end of the day so he can go straight over to his s/o’s place
Same as Mitsuya but an even worse texter. Prefers physical interaction and 80% of the time you will be left on read. For Mitsuya, it’s a solid 50/50.
Tells them about how school went, how he slept through almost everything, how draken was being a prick, yeah…
Love language is food: brings so much food over to your house. Medicine included once draken reminds him.
Shares food with you ALL the time and somehow doesn’t get sick. I’d like to imagine with all the shit he does, his immune system surpasses his kick.
Never does his homework when they’re around, prefers to spend time eating with them and playing games or whatever
Not as passionate about video games and manga and shit, but loves seeing them feeling better
Insists you’re too tired to do homework, truthfully he just wants their attention but doesn’t want to sound so needy when they’re sick
Won’t feed you but makes you feed him to cheer him up, probably bc he knows he’d make a mess feeding you
When you’re feeling ickier than usual, asks “you wanna get some air?” And will take you for a ride on his bike if you say yes!
If you say no, he’ll nod and go silent trying to think of something to appease you, and the rare occasion is he gives you a massage.
When he has a Toman meeting he’ll drop off stuff at the door but not before knocking so loud you could’ve sworn you heard him from hell. After pegging your door he’ll proceed to steal a kiss from you and run away giggling knowing you can’t do shit.
Draken
Gotta make sure his homie goes to school and so does he. After this, he will go to your place.
Terrible with gifts. Will have a brain hemorrhage debating if this gift is good enough.
Brings medicine and store bought food because he can’t cook for shit, but he makes sure it’s your favorite store bought food.
Way more effort into the store-bought food. Unlike Mikey, won’t just buy junk food but will make sure it’s covered in veggies or fruits, just to make sure you’re being properly nourished. Still will bring you chips or your favorite dessert bc he’s not tryna deprive you.
Absolutely no idea how to express his feelings. Hates seeing you sick but he doesn’t want to get sick because he’d infect a majority of toman being the Vice President. He just sits there with this grimace on his face and decides physical contact won’t do much as long as you’re… disinfected
Will literally fucking bathe you. No boogers or snot or whatever it is on him. You need to be SANITIZED before you touch this man.
Attempts to kiss your lips but you push away bc that’s a naughty naughty with a sick person!
Gives you the “how could you do this to me” look after bathing you and shit only to be rewarded with your hand in his face. Will definitely respect your refusal though because he knows you mean well, settled for a kiss on the cheek. He expects a makeup for it though!
Tucks you in for bed and gives you a goodnight kiss on your forehead, then dips
Absolutely messages you wakey wakey its time for schoo because he’s too busy with Mikey’s ph@t a$$
363 notes · View notes
starconsumer444 · 3 years
Text
Anniversary (18+)
Kenma x Male!Reader
A/N: Turns out that hiatus isn't permanent, so I'm back with my really shitty writing! I'll start taking requests again too (but I'm going to be slow at doing them and I probably won't get to all of them lol) <3
(CW/TW: Top!Reader, Dom!Reader, Sadist!Reader, Kidnapper!Reader, The reader is literally evil personified ;P, Kidnapping, Spit, RAPE/NONCON, FORCED FEMINIZATION [Kenma gets referred to as princess and his asshole is referred to as a cunt, needless to say... he doesn't like it], Blood [it's a nosebleed], hitting, crying, a lot of bad things??? disassociation??? this is... yeah... I tried...)
“I don’t want to hurt you.” That’s what you say, but Kenma can still feel the dull ache in his nose. “You’re too beautiful to hurt, you know?” You coo, lifting his chin with your index, forcing his eyes to meet yours. They’re puffy, red, and filled with hate. You smile and Kenmas stomach is in knots. His mind is telling him to run, but there’s nowhere to go, is there?
Trying to run is the reason blood is flowing so freely from his nose, down his chin, and on to the white dress you forced him into this morning. The bow around the dress— it’s pulled too tight. He’s undone the knot three times today, but every time you come and pull it back around his waist somehow tighter than the last time every...single...fucking...time.
Tears start to well up in his eyes again and when the first one starts to fall you let him drop his head. He’ll be past all this crying soon, he just has to get used to it or you’ll beat it out of him; whichever comes first.
He curls into himself, smearing blood and tears all into the skirt of the dress that surrounds him.
Beautiful, you think.
“I hate you.” It’s small, it’s quiet, it’s weak, it’s not worthy of a response— not yet— at least. You ignore it. You’ll let him have that one.
You're merciful enough to let him cry  on the floor between your legs as you flip through channels on the couch. You’re looking for something specific, something that will really help commemorate this as your one month anniversary.
Needless to say, you find it, right on time.
He lifts up suddenly, as if controlled by strings like a puppet, wiping tears from his eyes and turning to face the tv. He hears her voice and tears won't stop falling. They can’t stop falling when he sees his distraught mother on television crying about her son who’s been missing for a month. They can’t stop falling when he sees all his fans with candles holding prayer circles and praying for his safe return. They can’t stop falling when he sees his old friend, Kuroo, holding his shattered mother in a tight hug.
None of the words from the news broadcast register. He just sees people crying and holding each other. He sees candles lit for him. He sees flyers of his missing face being handed out. Then it’s over as quickly as it started, with the reporter coming back into frame and passing it off to one of her coworkers.
He turns to you with a new type of rage boiling inside of him and surfacing on his face. He’s up on his knees, perfectly manicured hands grasping at the fabric covering your thighs, brows furrowed, and finally looking you in the eye of his own volition. It’s the first time in a while it looks like he’s really seeing you.
What is he going to do?, You wonder.
“You know better than to hit me, don’t you?”
Surely he knows what will happen, he’s tried it several times since you’ve had him and not once has it ended positively for him.
His hands are gripping the fabric of your sweats, twisting at it with a certain fury that tells you he wants to hurt you. He does this a lot— it’s as if he has to muster up the courage to carry out such a fruitless action.
His body feels like he’s in a burning house. He can’t take this mocking. He can’t take this abuse. He can’t do it anymore. You’re watching him burn and not letting him leave or even trying to put the fire out. He wants to go home. He wants to hug his mom and tell her he’s alright. He’s tired of this.
“Please, let me call her.” He talks with a tight jaw, anger seething through clenched teeth. His head falls with his tears wetting his hands and your sweatpants. “Please let me call her. I want to go home so bad. Please.”
“No.”
And that’s all it takes.
“I fucking hate you!” and before he can even think to hurt you, he’s already down. All it takes is one good slap to the face and he’s back to his senses. His hands free the fabric he was holding on to for dear life.
He knows where he’s at. He knows he can’t win.
He lays arms crossed in your lap, sobbing. His body is wracked with shivers periodically as you stroke his hair.
“Pretty girls don’t act like this, you know.”
I’m not a girl, He thinks to himself. He’s far too gone to assert himself in any way right now.
“It’s okay to hate me. I still love you even if you do hate me.”
Kenma can’t stand that softness in your voice. You’re too good at playing the good guy. Anyone who wasn’t in his position would be inclined to fall for your fake prince charming bullshit. Is that how a psychopath like you gets by? You pretend to be soft spoken and harmless then hurt people when no one else can see you.
“You’re sick.”
“I know, it’s okay.”
You let him cry like that for ten minutes. You let him curse you under his breath (where he should keep it if he doesn’t like getting hurt), you let him get it all out. He even quietly begs for his mom and you can’t help but to think about how cute he is.
You pull him up by the back of his hair. Kenmas only got more beautiful since he’s been with you; you didn’t think it was possible. With drying blood and tears everywhere he’s mesmerizing. Even with your hands locked in his hair, this feels too good to be real.
He’s not looking at you, his eyes are unfocused, it’s more like he’s looking through you. Despite that, you pull him in for a kiss, blood and tears still fresh on his face. Of course, he doesn’t kiss back, but for once he doesn’t resist. It’s a small victory.
Now there's a growing tent under the surface of your sweats.
You let him go and pat the wide space on the couch beside you, “Get up here.”
Kenma shakes his head and backs away from you.
“Please let me go.” He pushes his body further away the moment you stand to tower over him. Then he’s turning and slipping on the skirt of the dress in his panicked rush to get away from you. He knows what’s going to happen and he wants no part in it.
You lift him with ease and slam him down onto the couch. Not once does he stop fighting you. He’s yelling for help and for you to stop. He’s kicking and screaming, begging like you’re going to kill him. Doesn’t he know that no one can hear him? It’s been a month and he hasn't figured out that much? If he’s that dumb, maybe he does really need you...
Still, it’s annoying and leaves you with no choice but to wrap your hand around his small throat. He kicks you in the stomach and your only response is to squeeze harder.
The fear sets in right then and there for Kenma. He stops his flailing and looks up to you with apologetic eyes. He doesn’t want to pass out, you choked him like this when he first got here. He can’t do it again— he doesn’t want to.
His hands come up to gently hold your wrists and his eyes become more apologetic with the increased pressure.
“Are you gonna calm down or do I have to calm you down myself?”
Kenmas body goes rigid for a second, but then he realizes he has to respond. He nods. His heart feels like it might beat out of his ribcage, but he has no choice but to force himself to stay calm.
Slowly, you release your grasp on his neck and flip up his dress to reveal his clean shaven legs and white lace panties (that do little to cover his private area). Your hand strokes down the soft skin of his thigh and you can feel him tense up, “Calm down princess. You wanna make me feel good, right?”
Kenma shakes his head and recoils expecting to be hit for his honesty.
You just chuckle as he slowly realizes you’re not going to hurt him for that and settles into himself. “Cute.” You say.
“Please…” The blonde mutters out.
“Please what?”
His throat hurts and his voice is shaky, “Don’t make me do this. I can’t do this again.” It sounds like he’s about to start crying again.
It’s been a month since you did this the first time and it’s been six days since the last time.
Kenma sees that you’re lost in thought and takes it upon himself to sit up as carefully as possible so that you don’t hit him. “Let me…” He trails off slipping his soft hand under the waistbands of both your sweatpants and underwear.
His strokes are graceless. He’s shaky, unsure, and clearly has no idea how to go about this. He only feels you getting harder in his hand as he looks you in the eye’s trying to find any sign of mercy.
You smile, “You’re such a good girl, huh?”
Kenma forces himself to smile back, but his fear is more obvious. “Yeah, Imma good girl.” He nods aggressively. If it means he has any chance of getting out of this, he’ll comply without a second thought. Dignity doesn’t matter when he’s here, he’s come to understand.
He plants soft kisses up your neck and across your jaw, and still his hand never stops. He’s so precious when he’s absolutely terrified.
“Use your spit.”
Immediately he pulls his hand away from you, spits in it, and goes right back to jerking your length. He’s so bad at it, it hardly feels good.
You titter at how anxious he seems and he jumps at the sound.
“Princess…” You start, and he hums in response. “I’m still going to fuck you, you know that, right?”
His hand withdraws straight away, “Please, no.” His head rests against your chest as he pleads for mercy. “I can’t take it. I don’t like it.”
“It’s okay, you’ll learn to like it.” You feel him shake his head. “Now, lay down.” He goes without protest.
Kenma’s far away from this by now. In his head, he’s anywhere but here. Still, he feels everything happening to him and hears everything going on around him. He doesn’t miss the sensation of you sliding off those lace panties or miss your hands on his hips turning him over to lay on his stomach. He can feel your tongue gliding over his hole, but he can’t react to it. He doesn’t squirm like he usually would— just takes whatever you’re doing to him.
The first noise Kenma makes is when you slide a single spit soaked finger into him. He’ll never get used to that sensation, and it grounds him every time. You can hear him sniffle and whine just as you thought he had run out of tears or at least had given up crying for the night.
Your finger drags against the special bundle of nerves and his body convulses and he lets out a yelp, that’s when you think it’s time to put in two fingers.
Your assault on his prostate continues and he cums, but he doesn’t seem to register it all that much. His senses are clearly a bit dulled by some sort of trauma defense mechanism his brain has. It doesn’t matter to you, though. You pull your fingers out of him and lube up your length with spit before pressing into his hole.
That gets a reaction, an intense one. He’s yelling, his words are slurred, and he’s pushing back at your waist, using his hand to try to get you to get out of him. His face looks mortified, like he didn’t know this was going to happen.
You simply grab his arm and pin it behind his back. No matter how hard he fights against you, he’ll never win and will always give up.
He’s so tight, and he’s spasming around you trying to adjust.
“Ahhh- your cunt’s so perfect, just for me, huh?” You moan out.
“No! No! No!” His voice is hoarse, he’s yelling and kicking his legs. You just press your weight onto him more.
When you start to thrust, he starts to say sorry and calm down. He’s sure he did something wrong but he just doesn’t know what. He’s sure that if he apologizes this will all be over, like some horrific nightmare.
His complaints are drowned out by your moans; it's been that way every time you’ve done this.
“Fuck, baby,” You moan breathily into his ear. “You’re so tight. You were made for this.” Kenmas head falls into the wet couch cushion. “I love you so much.”
Kenma cums again, and he must feel it this time judging by the pained moan he lets out. His body jerks with the harshness of your thrusts. There’s a mixture of sounds but the most apparent are moans and the sound of skin meeting skin.
You let go of his arm opting to pull him up by his hair, when you do, he’s back to his dazed apologizing. He seems so broken, it's exhilarating. Your “I love you.” is only met with another bland “I’m sorry.” it's clear he won't remember most of this.
When you cum inside him, there’s no reaction from him. You get up, leave him limp on the couch and go take a shower. When you come back, he’s just like you left him, still breathing, but generally unresponsive. He’s a great wife.
386 notes · View notes
realcube · 3 years
Text
hq!! boys with a short s/o
navi | masterlist | taglist
thanks to anon for this cute request
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characters:  kenma, noya, bokuto, & oikawa
trigger warning: swearing, sexual references, 
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kenma kuzome 
♡ bc you’re smol you can slip into his lap while he plays on his switch and since he can just peer over your shoulder, he lets you 
♡ also bc you are so - in his own words - compact..he kinda goes a bit rough on you bc he doesn’t know his own strength sometimes
♡ like he comes back from practise - having just bet up lev who’s like double his height, then pretends as though he’s the gentlest, most cuddly guy alive
♡ for instance, if you sit on his lap while he’s doing something important, he’ll push you off but bc he is quite strong and you’re quite small, you literally go flying across the room
♡ he also like the fact that he can place his chin on top of your head while hunched over 
♡ bc his posture is horrible which means that most ppl are up to his nose when he’s standing comfortably (and by comfortably i mean when his back is lookin like the letter c)
♡ but not you though bb
♡ he can rest his chin on your head WHILE messing up his back so thanks 💞
♡ also this is kinda unrelated but he probably enjoys seeing you cosplay as some of his favourite characters that are around your height
♡ idk he just seems like that sorta guy lol
♡ probably likes it when y’all get dirty in cosplay too yk
♡ and he constantly compares you to anime characters/ video game characters then makes comments accordingly lol
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
upon feeling kenma’s eyes momentarily shift from his nintendo switch onto you, your immediate response was to meet his gaze, shooting him a brief smile which quickly fell into frown upon hearing his following statement, “you’re around the same height as meliodas from seven deadly sins.”
you blinked rapidly, about to shrug him off and go back to whatever you were doing under you heard a “disgusting.” slip from his lips..so pounced on him. 
“KENMA! YOU CAN’T JUST CALL ME DISGUSTING BECAUSE I’M A SIMILAR HEIGHT TO AN ANIME CHARACTER YOU DON’T LIKE! DON’T  YOU HAVE AN--” to which kenma will just laugh and pretend like he’s trying to pry you off him when he’s actually really enjoying the feeling of you on top of him.
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yū nishinoya
♡ he is the short king™
♡ so he’s honestly so happy that not only does he get to be in the presence of his soulmate, but you’re also shorter than him 😍
♡ and i think having a shorter s/o would really help him with his body image 
♡ sorry to get serious on y’all so quick but i kinda think noya is secretly VERY insecure 
♡ he just has a ‘fake it till you make it’ sort of attitude in regards to his confidence
♡  but having a shorter s/o - especially if you’re really powerful, strong, confident or outspoken - would really give him an ego boost bc not only is he like ‘yep! that’s my star!’ but also everything you do is just so impressive to him
♡ also since you’re around the same height as him, sometimes he forgets that he can’t just jump on you and expect for you to hold his weight like he does with asahi, tanaka, tsukishima etc 
♡ so now you’re always on hyperalert when you pick him up from practise just in case he tackles you to the ground again
♡ it’s happened multiple times even when you were paying close attention though so i’d suggest just wearing a helmet next itme
♡ YJUHGFF he’s definitely the sort of guy to hype you up to his friends after you do the bare minimum
♡ and he ALWAYS mentions your height unless you tell him to stop 
♡ (he just wants his friends to know that just bc they are vertically gifted, they are no better than you or him >:(( keep em humble, yk? ) 
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
“yep! they’re getting their photo taken at this professional modelling company thingy with all those cool, chunky camera and the bright lights! they’re basically a model- and a few inches smaller than me so, perhaps short is the new sexy.” noya boasted with a casual shrug, feeding off of the amazing looks he was getting from hinata, tanaka and yamaguchi. 
upon noticing that yamaguchi was falling for nishinoya’s exaggerations, tsukishima chimed in, “short is definitely not the new sexy.” and before nishinoya could retort, tsukki hummed, “anyway, model, huh? what brand are they modelling for?”
noya’s lips curled into a bright smile and he clicked his tongue, almost to say ‘glad you asked’, before declaring proudly, “their passport!”
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kōtarō bokuto
♡ another one that doesn’t know his own strength 
♡ especially around you 
♡ like he squeezes you SO tight when hugging that you basically suffocate
♡ and his grip on your hand is always unreasonably strong too so never let him hold your dominant hand or else you won’t be able to hold a pencil for another week
♡ and sometimes he pinches your cheek when he thinks you look especially babey and jesus christ he could leave a bruise
♡ god forbid you’re watching him practise and he makes a killer spike then he turns to look at you with starry eyes--
♡ ...
♡ RUN 🏃‍♂️💨
♡ mans will chase you around the whole gym to pick you up and twirl you to celebrate his spike 
♡ the problem occurs when he holds you so close to him that you suffocate from his reek of BO
♡ he spins so fast that it makes you feel extremely sick and dizzy
♡ ALSO let’s not forget that one time he accidently let go of you a few seconds to early and you went fucking flying across the gym and landed on onaga’s water bottle 
♡ not only did you have to awkwardly hobble to the bathroom with soaking wet leggings so you could change into your spare pair, you also felt obliged to buy onaga a new water bottle 
♡ if you tell him to be gentler plz do it nicely or else he will be sad :((
♡ yeah he treats you like you’re his 7″0, ripped, basketball player s/o but you’re not 
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
why were you here? why did you think this was a good idea to say yes to? oh, yeah, it because he gave those adorable damn puppy eyes that you are physically incapable of saying no to. on the bright side, perhaps he can use those puppy eyes to get you a free hearse driver for your funeral - which was sure to be soon.
through, your funeral planning was cut sort by bokuto chirping, “are you ready, babe?!” 
you sighed, arms outstretched as he stood with his back facing you, ready to trust fall onto you once you gave the ‘ok’. or so you thought. 
“yeah, bo. go o--” you couldn’t even finish your sentence before you felt bokuto’s muscular back suddenly weigh down on your arm. you tried to hold him up, - you really did - but both the surprise of it and his weight was enough to make you come crashing down with him. 
“(y/n)! you had one job!”
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tōru oikawa
♡ you’re his baby
♡ or at least, he treats you like one sometimes
♡ he says he treats you like a prince(ss) but everyone knows that he acts like you’re his first born child
♡ bc he literally carries you everywhere
♡ taking a brisk stroll on the beach? oikawa will force you to get on his back and use the excuse that he doesn’t want your clothes to get dirty 
♡ you’re in the mall and you even suggest that your feet are sore/ you’re tired? he’ll carry you bridal style anywhere you want to go - literally does not care if people are giving him weird looks 
♡ drunk? he’ll throw you over his shoulder and carry you home 
♡ just chilling on the couch? he’ll approach you, scoop you up into his arms and walk around the house 
♡ it annoys you sometimes but it can really come in handy other times
♡ like for instance, at a festival
♡ if you both get stuck at the back and you’re struggling to see the stage bc of all the literal giants looming in front of you, he’ll let you hop on his shoulders 🥺
♡ he probably teases you for it though lol
♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥ ♡ ♥
“awh, can the small one not see the stage?”
you furrowed your brows, outstretching your arms to him - probably the first time you ever actually asked him to pick you up, so you prayed that he'd take you up on your first offer without you having to beg. “yeah, can you help?”
this oikawa you’re talking to; the petty king. so instead, he gave you some solemn advice before turning his attention back onto the performance, “try growing a few inches-- who am i kidding? a few feet.”
“rude.” you spat, fretfully looking around for a moment before coming to terms with the fact you’re not going to be able to see the performer, so you decided to just try vibe with the music instead.
“(y/n).” you heard oikawa call from beside you, so you turn your head to look at him then noticed that he was crouched on the ground, “what are you waiting for? get on.” 
476 notes · View notes
bokutosworld · 3 years
Text
i won’t say (i’m in love) | kageyama t. 
pairing: kageyama tobio x gn!reader
wc: 1,935 words. fluff, high school crushes. hinata being a wingman lol. 
summary: an encounter at kageyama’s favorite spot in school leads him to meet someone that makes him feel all sorts of confusing feelings. 
a/n: so if it’s not yet obvious by the title, this was inspired by the song from hercules, i won’t say i’m in love :D this idea has been on my drafts for quite some time and i finally had the chance to work on it yaaay 
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The first time Kageyama saw you, you were in front of the vending machine he frequented.
It was lunch break, and with ten minutes left before the next period, he figured he could get his favorite banana milk. He was walking towards the area that hid the machine away from prying and hungry eyes. Kageyama was confident that no one was familiar with its spot, especially since the machine always seemed to never go out of stock of his go-to drinks. But boy was he wrong.
The instant that he rounded the corner, he heard the recognizable thud of the drink box falling and someone getting it from its confines. He took a peek and saw a glimpse of a student cheerfully sticking the straw to the pack, humming as they take a sip of the milk. With a contented smile, the student walks off and passes him, giving a side glance and showing off a smirk to Kageyama.
How odd, the setter thought. Though he didn't dwell on it for any much longer, opting to get his own share of the milk. However, when he stood in front of the machine, his heart lurched upon seeing the red light that indicated not available. Kageyama's eyes shoot wide open and he whipped his head towards the direction you went, sending a glare to your retreating back as he realized you took the last milk. Oh, he was furious and poor Hinata was on the receiving end of that sour mood for the rest of the day.
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Since that unfateful encounter, Kageyama has been noticing your presence everywhere. And it was an understatement to say that he didn't find you annoying. He remembers how you went under his nose to grab that last box of milk and it still infuriates him.
Whenever you walk by in the hallways, he can't help but follow you with a pointed look on his face. To any outsider, Kageyama looked as if he was sending curses towards your way, at least that was what Hinata thought. But actually, the setter was trying to figure out who you were and why he hadn't seen you in the campus before that day. One day, his curiosity finally got the best of him and he asked Hinata about his concern.
"Huh? What do you mean you don't know Y/N," the orange-haired boy replied. Hinata gave his friend a puzzled look, and as if the cogs in his mind stopped turning, a teasing grin made it way to his face. "Ah, so that's why you've been looking at them like a madman recently. You're so dumb, Kageyama! How could you not recognize them, they're literally our class president."
Hinata was right. That time, Kageyama was dumbfounded when they returned to the classroom and saw you chatting with your friends in the corner. He was entranced by you and the way you were laughing at one of the jokes that he hit his hip in the sharp edge of the desk. He shrieked, causing you to turn your head towards him with worry cast over your face.
It didn't hurt that bad. He was massaging that spot on his hip when you silently stalked towards him. You stood by his side, placing a hand on his back and asking if he was okay. It took all of Kageyama's willpower not to lose his composure in front of you, but Hinata caught on his actions. In that moment, an idea popped up in Shoyo's mind.
"Hey, Pres," he put an arm around Kageyama's shoulders, wiggling his eyebrows at him. "Can I ask you a favor? Can you bring my friend here to the clinic and get his injury checked out? I'm sure it's only minor but we can't be too sure." Kageyama angrily nudged Hinata, a string of stupid, you idiot falling on his lips.
"Yeah, no problem. Come on, Kageyama, let's get you to the nurse."
He was immediately flustered. Kageyama swears his face has never felt that hot when you took his shoulders and wrapped them on your own, acting as his crutch as the two of you walked to the clinic.
Kageyama cleared his throat, his eyes looking at anywhere but you. "H-hey, I'm not completely paralyzed. I can walk on my own."
You laughed, "It's fine. You can rely on me sometimes, you know. Besides, I don't want our star player sitting out of the games." A moment of silence clouds over the two of you on the rest of the way, but just before entering the clinic, you say, "I know you love volleyball. You should enjoy it without any injury."
Kageyama thinks that maybe you were much more than a milk thief after all.
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Hinata doesn't know what happened after he sent you and Kageyama to the clinic. But he has a slight idea about what changed when he sees that his teammate has been talking more to you at every chance that he gets, walking by your desk and starting up conversations when he can.
In mornings, he notices that Kageyama always has two packs of milk in hand. And when you enter the room, he sees how he lights up, a shy smile forming on his face as you wave a hand and walk to his desk. He couldn't believe his own eyes when he watches Kageyama give you the other milk and he comes to a conclusion that he bought it just for you.
In gym class, Hinata observes the way Kageyama is extra pumped up to be against you in the 100m dash activity. He sees the playful taunts he sends your way and how you gladly react to them and indulge Kageyama in his competitiveness. He honestly thinks Kageyama won't let you off the hook but he's shocked, when just a few centimeters away from the finish line, he fakes a trip and falls down on the ground. You pass him in high spirits, jumping up and down as you exclaim that you won against the King of the Court. And Hinata knows that the normal Kageyama would be pouting and pissed off at his loss.
But this wasn't a normal Kageyama. He figures that this was a Kageyama in love. 
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The pair was assigned to set up the net and prepare the gym before practice started. They were in the storage room getting the equipment when Hinata started teasing Kageyama about his little crush.
"I don't know what you are talking about." The taller boy strongly denied all the accusations that Hinata was throwing at him. "Just shut up and help me here."
Hinata chuckled like an evil villain and continued to spew obvious facts. "You give them milk every morning. You unconsciously make them laugh with your not so funny jokes. You look out for them during gym class more than their friends does. You make time before practice to say goodbye before they go home."
"So, what is your point?"
His friend smirked, "Kageyama Tobio, you have a crush."
Kageyama stood frozen, his hands went limp by his sides at the sudden realization. He was aware that in his recent interactions with you, he'd sometimes feel sick, like he'd get nervous around you, his breathing becomes unstable and his palms get sweaty.  He has noticed it himself how the surroundings would turn brighter whenever you walked in the hallways or how his own heart would beat twice as fast whenever you were approaching him in his desk.
He didn't know what that feeling was called. He didn't want to give it a name. But Hinata just had to point it out. Frustrated that his friend called him out on his adoration for you, Kageyama stayed silent and started playfully punching Hinata. The poor boy was only saved when they heard footsteps come in, and Kageyama was quick to push Hinata away and avoid your gaze when you walked in.
Hinata was grumbling as he walked out of the scene, leaving you two some time to figure out your mutual feelings.
Kageyama immediately crouched down and hid his face on his hands, making you laugh at his awkwardness. He inquired in a muffled voice, "How much of that did you hear?"
You answered him truthfully, narrating the moment when you stopped to hide behind the doors was when you heard Hinata starting to tease him about his little crush. "I'm honestly flattered, Kageyama. Though I am also surprised that Hinata was watching us closely. Or should I be creeped out?"
He glanced up at you, standing from his position and going off on a tangent about how he also thought that Hinata was looking into things too much. He complained that instead of thinking about his love life, Hinata could've used that time to practice his spikes and jumps.
At this point, Kageyama was rambling and though you thought it was endearing, you needed him to pause and breathe. "Can you stop talking for literally ten seconds?" This seemed to work as he shut up and straightened his back, his eyes gazing straight into yours.
Kageyama realized, "Why are you here anyway?"
You smiled and brought out something from your pocket. "I wanted to give this to you." It was the banana milk that he loves. "I saw that it was the last one in the vending machine. I figured you'd want to have it. Have a drink before or after practice."
You thought it wasn't humanly possible to see eyes literally sparkling, but Kageyama was giving you proof of that as he excitedly took the drink from your hands. The corners of his mouth turned upward in a soft smile, and you thought that was the prettiest that he has ever been. He remembers the moment he first saw you and laughs, "You didn't have any problems before taking the last available milk for yourself."
It was your turn to get shocked, hiding a blush behind your palms. You also recall that incident, "Stop, I didn't do that on purpose. Was it my fault that they haven't restocked on that day?”
Kageyama scoffed, "Yeah, right." You pouted, crossing your ams on your chest as you looked away from him. "Thank you."
He has put the straw in the opening of the pack, taking a sip of the milk when you asked him for the second time. "So, you like me, huh?" Kageyama almost choked on his drink, and you laughed before patting his back to help him calm down. Some liquid were spilling from his lips and you were quick to wipe it with your hand. The action was enough to render Kageyama speechless, so he put some distance between the two of you.
You were taking some tissue from your bag to give to Kageyama when you also shared a confession of your own. "If it makes you feel any better, I like you too."
"I'm free this weekend. If you want to take me out a date, you know my number." He looked at you expectantly, the words yes, I'd love to go out with you resting on the tips of his tongue but he wasn't able to let it out. Because in a few seconds, you boldly took a step closer and pressed your lips to his cheek. His face felt warm and his heart was beating like crazy.
"I'll be expecting your call, Tobio."
In that moment, the feelings that he kept on a tightly closed lid were overflowing and it was the affirmation that he needed to know that he was already in too deep for you.
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bluegarners · 3 years
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hiya @viceturtle! I finally got it done! Here is your Bad Things Happen Bingo request with Dick and Jason; you can also read it on ao3
What Have I Done?
It’s a lot. He’s not going to lie.
Dick was dead for eight months. There were no ifs, ands, or buts about it. It was a fact that they were all forced to deal with, all forced to live with. Dick was dead and there was nothing any of them could do about it. And for a time, Jason had held onto the small belief, he’s not going to call it hope, that Dick had somehow managed to pull through. That even despite the beatings, the torture, everything before and after it, Dick had managed to pull through and come out of it all alive.
But he hadn’t. That was the thing, at its core. Dick died. 
Jason knows what it is to be dead. To be beaten and left to die. To struggle and still search for a way out of the shit hole you’re suddenly in and cling to that light, that stupid, stupid promise in the back of your head that screams, Help is coming, just hold on a little longer, that forces you to keep struggling, keep surviving, keep hoping for a way out despite the circumstances. Jason knows and it absolutely sucked. 
He died and then clawed his way out of his own coffin. One of his fingers is permanently misshapen, wood chips and metal piercing through his stiff and cold skin. He’s got scars all over his body to prove that he died, to prove that he was beaten with a crowbar, messed around with like he was just some dummy, some thing that could take a beating and then some. Up and down and across and lined; the scars are all over him and he died.
And Dick died too. 
In those eight months, Jason felt more connected to his deceased older brother than he ever had before. A deep and twisted connection over a shared death, a similar fate so convoluted it makes Jason sick to think about sometimes. His murderer is still out there. Jason has to live with that fact and even though it’s not fine and things would be so much easier without that psychopath, Jason gets it. Sometimes. Gets the moral code, the compass, that shrouds Batman and his little followers.
And he’s trying. He is. He made an effort to try and do the right thing when Dick died because suddenly, the role of older brother had fallen onto him and even though he doesn’t have a good relationship with Tim or the recently resurrected Damian, or anyone for that matter, there was still that recognition that it was all on him now. He was the eldest. He was the one to look towards. Not look up to, no, he will never claim the title of a role model, but now he’s the oldest, the most experienced, the next in line when one just can’t go to Bruce about shit going on.
The point being is that he did try, put in more effort than he probably should have, to stepping up to the plate and taking a swing at being better. At being the eldest of the entire brood and not fucking it up horribly. He switches to rubber bullets and smoke pellets. He keeps his excessive violence reserved for only the worst scum and even then still attempts to steer clear from Batman’s territories. He takes care of the Narrows, rekindles a sort of friendship with Tim, doesn’t fight the literal child that lurks in the Cave, and avoids confrontations with Bruce altogether.
It works and it’s good. He steps up, frankly owns being the eldest, and he’s fine. He’s fine with it. He’s still got his reputation intact, Red Robin isn’t terrified of his presence any longer, and Robin doesn’t pull a sword every time they spot one another. So what if he slips up occasionally and gets carried away? They’re just rubber bullets, weapons all the same, and they’re no different from getting hit with Batman’s fist (which Jason knows, from experience, hurts like hell) or getting swung at with a large knife. 
He had a thing going on, is what Jason’s trying to get at, and then Dick showed up.
Dick. Richard Grayson. Who died eight months ago after he was tortured by the Syndicate and had his heart stopped by Lex Luthor. Who they had a funeral for. Who they mourned for. Who Jason had attempted to fill the gaping hole he had left behind.
Who Jason thought had died.
Betrayal is a word Jason feels like he could apply to a majority of his life. Betrayal from his parents, his poor, poor mother who just couldn’t muster up enough fucks. Bruce, Batman, for getting him into the vigilante life, for letting him wear that damn costume and get himself blown up for all his efforts. Talia, for restoring his mind after he was supposed to be dead. Bruce, Batman, again, for letting his murderer walk around like it was another Sunday, any other day, just a nice, normal day for a stroll like he didn’t just kill Bruce’s own son-
Yeah, Jason feels like he has liberal use of betrayal. It’s just an old song he hums sometimes and lets others join in occasionally.
But there was an unspoken code, a silent right-of-passage, when it came to being Robin. A mutual understanding of sorts. You don’t back-stab another Robin. Ever. You don’t lie, cheat out, betray a fellow Robin. There were too many shared experiences when it came to being Batman’s, Bruce’s, Robin and that ultimately revolved all back to trust and knowing that things were still the same despite all these years. Being Robin was both the best thing to ever happen to someone and also the ultimate death sentence. You don’t just get to be Robin either. You’ve got to earn it, to prove yourself, to show that you can take it all on, to keep up with Batman and the ever changing and violent Gotham.
So, when Dick shows up with an apology on his lips and the expectation of being welcomed home after all this time, Jason punches him square in the jaw. It’s surreal, a part of him thinking his fist will just phase right through the man’s face, but his knuckles connect and if the sound of his fist against Dick’s jaw isn’t the most satisfying and cruel thing he’s ever heard, Jason doesn’t know what is. 
It’s agony, nearly, to see the red blossom on his older brother’s cheek because, holy hell, that means it’s all real. That Dick is really alive and not still buried in that weed covered yard with decaying roses scattered on top of it. Dick is alive and Jason is furious because he’s supposed to be dead and Jason already tried so hard to fill the other man’s impossibly huge shoes and he was doing a damn good job at it. He likes to think so, at least.
But who cares, right? Who gives a shit when Dick is back now and it was all for nothing? Everyone can just go back to their normal routines now that the star player is back and they don’t need a fill-in like Jason to stick around. All that effort, all that time, all that trying all summing up into one big, Surprise, I’m not dead, from the man of the hour himself.
Jason avoids Dick after that. The man said he wasn’t staying long, just “checking in” with everyone like he was just on some business call for a few months and not dead. 
And that’s the root of it, Jason thinks. That’s what really gnaws at him because Dick is treating the whole situation exactly like he was on some extended vacation and just forgot to tell anyone where he was going. Not like his absence literally turned their entire world upside down. Not like the loss, the emptiness, that literally echoed everywhere Jason went was consuming and terrifying. In those eight months, Jason had to toe the line between being the eldest and maintaining his identity as Red Hood, and that’s where Jason truly felt close to Dick. Felt like he finally got what Dick and Bruce’s arguments were about so many years ago, this constant war of wanting to be better, wanting to have freedom, wanting to stay yourself when there was a constant war of others trying to get you to fill a role that you don’t want. 
Finally, Jason felt like he had some other important connection to his elusive older brother that had nothing to do with the man that housed them, only for it all to be thrown across the room and into the trash. 
To keep it simple, bare-bones, really dumbed down, Dick lied. About being dead, of all things. Jason can get behind needing to lay low after all that, being stripped of your identity on live television wasn’t exactly great for their kind of lifestyle, but to just leave? To go out on some mission and leave the rest of them out to dry like that? No warning, no hints, no notes, nothing? God, at least Jason made an appearance. Granted, not the best sort of re-introduction, but at least he wasn’t trying to hide.
To say the least, Jason is hurting. The anger faded along with any sort of need to prove to Dick that he had stepped up when he left. Now, he just feels… shitty. In a way, this is what he had been half-way expecting. No one stays dead in this business. There is always someone with a back-up or ex-machina to save the day and bring back a fallen hero, villain, whatever. But there had just been something so final, so human in Dick’s death. In that moment, seeing the mask ripped off, seeing his brother’s face on T.V out of context, away from the normal flashiness that was being related to a billionaire, it had scared Jason because that was his brother, Dick Grayson, world’s most annoying man in the universe, on T.V; beaten, bloodied, bruised, and humiliated for everyone to see.
He’s always been jealous of how clean and clear Dick’s eyes looked. Just a simple and rare shade of blue, obnoxiously bright and searching. Jason’s mother used to say he had his father’s eyes, a muddy mix of blue and green. He’s never liked his eyes, but there was always something so attention grabbing with Dick’s. Seeing them on T.V, wide and blood-shot and bruised to hell; the blue was out of place and humanizing in a way that Jason just couldn't describe because it was simply Dick Grayson there. Not Nightwing. Not a hero. It was just Dick Grayson, world’s worst older brother ever, looking lost, defiant, and defeated all at once.
And that hurt.
The man is like some nasty disease that won’t leave him alone though. Their first meeting was two days ago and Jason is trying his best to ignore the knife in his chest, not literally, when Dick shows up. Just outside the Narrows on the roof of a bodega, Dick appears from where ever the fuck he’s been and walks over to Jason. It’s a cue, Jason knows, when thunder rumbles in the distance and if he were a bit more into literature, feeling a bit more melancholy for his freshman year of high school, Jason would say that a storm is coming for the both of them, not just Gotham.
Dick walks with his hands in his pockets, stuffed inside an old brown jacket that looks well-used and well-loved. Jason’s never seen the jacket before. Must’ve gotten it on his extended vacation. A part of Jason knows that Bruce was in on it too, that Bruce probably deserves just as much anger he’s dishing out towards Dick, maybe even more, but Jason’s tired of trying to play nice and get along. Dick is the one in front of him now, right here on a Wednesday night with the glowing, neon advertisement for Coke singing behind their heads and a run down, twenty year old convenience shop beneath their feet. 
Dick is here and now when he should be dead.
Just like Jason should be.
“What do you want?” he asks, the metallic tin of his voice modulator diminishing some of the threat. It’s a known fact that Red Hood guards his territory with a viciousness rivaling a rabid dog. Outsiders aren’t welcome. Never welcome.
In contrast, Dick is mask-less. Civilian. Same clear blue eyes from eight months ago that were sealed shut the last time Jason saw them. A dark bruise stains Dick’s right cheekbone, the shape of knuckles and betrayal. It’s a good contrast.
“I came to say goodbye,” the other man answers, stopping just short of six feet in front of Jason, “and that I’m sorry I couldn’t tell you sooner. I really am,” he insists when Jason remains silent. “Things just… happened too fast. It killed me to be away from you all for so long. I wanted to tell you, I did-”
“Really?” Jason interrupts lowly. “It killed you, huh?”
Dick sighs, a hand coming up to brush through his hair. “That’s not what I meant. You know it’s not.”
“I don’t know, Dicky. Times are changing, you know. One minute, you’re the star pupil, and the next I’m your backup. And now,” Jason shrugs, letting his hand come up to rest on the holster he keeps on his hip, “I’m not so sure about that.”
Dick is eyeing Jason like he’s looking at something he doesn’t like. Something that’s leaving a bad taste in his mouth. But that’s just something he’s going to have to deal with, isn’t it? Suck it up buttercup, and all that.
A laugh erupts from Jason as he truly takes it all in. “You know,” he chuckles, nothing humorous causing his mirth, “you really had me there for awhile. I bought you flowers, went to your funeral, dealt with all that shit, and yet here you are. In the flesh.” He laughs again, fingers curving steadily around the grip of his gun. “I think I liked you better dead, Dick.”
The older man frowns, brow dipping into a neat crease. Not a single wrinkle on his perfect, tan, not dead face. “The situation was unavoidable,” he says, like he actually believes a word he utters. “Batman needed a guy on the inside. The, hm, circumstances leading up to that set it up so that I could be that guy. It wasn’t exactly my choice to stay dead, Jay.”
“Names,” Jason snarks, that same anger he felt two days ago rearing its ugly head again. “You know, you say you didn’t have a choice, but I think there’s a clear distinction between dead and alive, don’t you? It might just be me, who knows because fuck if I do, but I think a warning woud’ve sufficed. A fucking warning. ”
Something must click in Dick’s head as his frown deepens. His hands are out of his jacket pockets now. They’re both tense.
“I’ll be back soon,” he says. “Maybe another month. Two at most. When I get back, I’ll try and…” Dick trails off there, as if searching for the right words, but Jason doesn’t have the patience for him to find the right way to say the same bullshit he’s already heard before. 
He’s so tired. So, so tired.
“We were fine without you,” he snarls, relishing in the way Dick’s eyes widen at the claim. “The world doesn’t stop turning just because you decide to go off on a little adventure. Newsflash, asshole: None of us need you. You can’t come back here and expect everything to fall back to the way things were just because you decide it’s time to show your face again.”
“I was doing what I thought was right,” Dick snaps back. “Look, I’m sorry you had to step up and be a decent person for once-”
“And there it is,” Jason growls, unholstering his gun. “You think you’re so much better than me. You’re just so goddamn smug you can’t even see your own mistakes. What, is my being here just too inconvenient for you? Can’t make all the little hero-worshipers fall back into line like they used to?”
“Stop putting words in my mouth. I did what I thought was best for everyone and I paid the price for it.”
Jason lunges, cutting the feet between them into inches. “What was best?” he yells, swinging with one fist and aiming with the other. “Who the hell are you to decide that?”
Dick retaliates, pushing away Jason with a kick that connects to his armored chest. It’s barely a glancing blow though and he’s charging forwards again, squeezing the trigger as a shot rings off into the air, missing Dick’s foot by a few centimetres. Another crack of thunder resounds in the distance and a bolt of lightning cracks open the dark sky. Dick rolls away from Jason’s tackle, on the balls of his feet and ready to jump away again.
“I didn’t come here to fight you,” Dick tries, widening his stance. “I just came to, god, I don’t know, Jay. I didn’t ask for this!”
“Cut the bull,” Jason says, raising his gun again. He’s got it trained on Dick’s mid-section and even though a part of him knows he’s not going to take the shot, another part of him has his finger itching towards the trigger. “None of us asked for any of the fuckery that comes our way, but we deal with it, right? I’m dead, you’re dead, the brat’s dead, we’re all dead!”
There’s another crack of thunder, one that brings the rain with it. It pours, instantly drenching the pair, and a sheet of gray divides them. There’s surely something poetic about it, the divide that surrounds them both, but Jason’s not one to dwell long.
“Well, I’m not dead anymore!” Dick screams through the rain. “I am alive! I’ve been dead for eight months and I don’t want to fucking be anymore! I want to come home, Jay. I am alive. Goddamnit, I am alive!”
“So why didn’t you tell us that? Tell any of us that? All of this, that’s on you , Dick. You want to know why there wasn’t a big fucking parade for you? Why no one was fighting over the chance to be the first one to get to shake your hand? It’s because we don’t trust you anymore. No one fucking wants you near them because that’s how badly you fucked up.”
He must strike a nerve because Jason sees something crumple on Dick’s face. 
“I didn’t- I didn’t want to leave you guys, Jay. God, you’ve got to believe me on that. I had no choice. It was either I leave and do this for Batman or-”
That same anger rises up again. Anger from different directions, different thoughts, but ultimately because it’s about Batman. Always, always about Batman. What he wants. What he needs you to do. Because if you don’t do it, and someone dies, it’s your fault. And Dick has always been the suck-up, the one to come when called, because even after all their spats and all these years of silence between them, Dick was still a Robin first and goddamnit if Jason doesn’t understand that. He hates that he understands that need to please Batman, to do what he asks in the hope of just some tiny ounce of praise or acknowledgment, but Dick is a grown adult. He’s not Robin anymore.
None of them are.
Dick takes a step forward and Jason squeezes the trigger, feeling the recoil in his wrist as Dick freezes, the bullet breezing right past his armpit. His eyes are wide, finally taking the weapon in as it is, and there must be some realization going off inside Dick’s head because now he’s the one charging in, stance low and shifty, and Jason’s on the defense now. His finger is still on the trigger, just barely, and he’s raising it to aim again when a flying round-house knocks the gun from his hand and fist drives under his chin. It disorients him a bit because, damn, he didn’t actually expect Dick to fight back, Jason was trying to get him to go away, but now they’re both serious. They’re both dangerous.
It’s a no-weapons brawl, just fists and dirty kicks and the rain is still pounding away against the bodega. The rain has plastered Dick’s hair to his skull and Jason is grateful for his helmet because it’s clear the water is making it difficult for the older man to see. He takes advantage of this, striking down with his elbow on Dick’s trapezius and quickly hooking his left foot around his ankle. It works for a split second, Dick thrown off and unbalanced, before Dick is tumbling down and using his own momentum to pull Jason down with him. 
They’re on their backs now, rough and cold cement bleeding through their jackets, and the neon Coke sign flickers in and out as thunder continues to roll and shake the world.
“You should’ve stayed dead,” Jason snarls, taking a jab at his older brother’s face. “You should’ve never come back.”
Dick frees one of his hands from underneath the massive bulk of Jason’s suit, palm striking the sides of his helmet. “Take off the godamn hood and say that to my face,” Dick pants, shoving one of his knees into Jason’s side. “Look me in the eye and tell me you want me dead, Jay. Tell me you want me dead. ”
Another bolt of lightning splits the dark and its image refracts against the many puddles, and for a moment, the light sears into Jason’s eyes. He flinches against the burn and it’s enough hesitation for Dick to take the unguarded moment and flip Jason, crouching with one knee on his chest and the other digging into Jason’s forearm. They’re both breathing heavily, exhausted both physically and mentally, and he doesn’t bother to stop his brother as Dick reaches down and shoves the helmet off of his face.
Their eyes meet and Jason squints up at clear blue. Yeah, he hates that color. Hates it so much it feels like something ugly in his stomach, coiling and clenching. They’re both frowning but Dick just looks resigned. Jason hates that too. Now that he has the chance, he can see new scars on his brother’s face. New, finer lines and white and pink discoloration. 
Funny how eight months can make someone look so much older.
“I wish you had stayed dead,” Jason finally says, hating himself all the more for it. “I wish you had never come back.”
Dick stumbles off of him and there’s a thin trail of red leaking from one of his eyebrows that keeps getting washed away. Jason doesn’t even remember hitting him there, but he must’ve been excessive. Must’ve over-done it. Just another thing he’s managed to fuck up. Check it off the list. 
He sits up, feeling the ache of a sore back and numerous bruises, and watches as his brother leans heavily against the poles of the advertisement. The rain only seems to come down harder, bouncing off the yellow stained bodega roof. He gets to his feet slowly, careful to keep an eye on the slouching man, and treads over to pick up his helmet. His gun is closer to the bright neon sign and when he gets near enough, Dick looks up, something horribly heavy and sad, settling into his face.
“Okay,” is all he says, nodding once. “Okay, Jay.”
Dick reaches into his jacket pocket once more, fiddling with something, but Jason’s too preoccupied putting his helmet back on to really pay attention to it. They’re done fighting. Done with whatever all of that was. His hair is soaked, his jacket is going to have a layer of mildew on it in the morning, and Jason is tired. Beat. He can’t find the will-power to truly be bothered with anything else. 
This is his territory so he’s not technically fleeing, but that’s what it looks like. Tail between his legs, off to lick his wounds, Jason’s sure that’s what Dick is thinking (he knows that’s not true, he knows this, and he’s got a little secret screaming, pounding away in the back of his skull, but Jason’s too burned out to deal with it, to address it). He walks to the edge of the roof with his back turned on his older brother, his alive and breathing, long lost brother, and jumps off, sliding down the fire escape and landing on the grimy streets below. His boots squelch in the rain, and there’s water logged into his socks, but Jason ignores it in favor of staring ahead. Refusing to look back.
Here’s the thing about being a Robin that everyone who’s been one before knows. 
You rely on each other. There’s no codependency, not really, but there is a certain degree of reliance on past and current Robins. Robin is the inspiration. Not Batman. Batman doesn’t inspire little kids to go out in the night and get punched in the face and witness cruelty so awful you have nightmares for years after. Batman doesn’t inspire light and forgiveness and mercy; that’s all Robin’s doing. The bright colors, the chatter, the youth. That’s all on Robin, the little child weapons they are, and the shared experience of being that for Batman is a bond that runs so much deeper than blood. Thick and interwoven and relied upon so much more heavily than a simple crest or uniform.
And here’s that screaming secret that vibrates inside Jason’s skull: he’s happy Dick’s back. That Dick’s alive. At the end of the day, Dick was the first Robin, the first light, and having him snuffed out was a world that got three shades darker, bleaker. It was Dick’s Robin that truly gave it the twinge of hope all the Robins after carry with them; he was the model, the mold, they shaped themselves after. Him being dead changed that perspective for the worse because the first Robin made it. That’s what was so important, what tips the scales for the confidence of all Robins after. Dick made it. Survived being Robin, survived past Robin, and became his own hero. 
Dick outlived being Robin and that was the ultimate goal. To survive. 
So him dying was the last straw but now that he’s back, alive, everything was going to be okay again. Yeah, they’re all still messed up from it, there’s going to be a lot of trust built back up again, but they’re Robins for Christ's sake. Thicker than blood, stronger than a crest, relied on more than Batman. And maybe Jason’s being sentimental, still trying to be more eloquent than his sophomore English education allowed him to be, but God, he’s trying. He’s trying so hard despite the ache that wears down his bones and the fire that consumes his brain.
That’s why he gives in. Turns around. Looks back. Does what he thought he was too stubborn to do, but things change and-
The neon sign is brighter. No, that’s not right. There’s another source of that eerie, glowing light and Jason’s eyes widen as he sees a person step through it. Another figure, broad, muscular, unfamiliar, and they’re heading straight for Dick. His brother. Who is still leaning against the advertisement poles. Who’s not doing a damn thing to avoid the stranger that’s fast approaching. 
Soreness and fatigue forgotten, Jason starts sprinting, boots pounding against the pavement as he cranes his neck upwards to watch the stranger continue to advance.
“Dick!” he yells in warning, drowned out with the rain. “Dick, move!”
He slams into the fire escape, hands scraping up the ladder as he hauls himself three steps at a time, chest heaving and heart beating wildly. He slips, losing his footing, and Jason grunts as he feels the pull on his shoulder and his knees bang into the sides of the bodega. He pushes on though, gripping the metal tightly and finally reaching the top.
He’s pulling himself over, gasping and searching, and he sees the man tugging Dick closer to the strange light, what Jason thinks must be some sort of portal, and before he’s even gotten a leg over the edge, his right hand is scrambling for purchase on his gun. He takes aim and fires without a second thought and curses aloud when it jams.
“Dick!” he yells again, throwing the useless weapon away and falling over onto the roof. “Stop! Stop! What’re you doing?”
His brother just trudges on though, bicep gripped by the stranger that continues to drag him closer and closer to the pulsating light, ghoulishly pink and saturating the air with an ominous buzz. Another flash of lightning illuminates the sky and Jason trips over himself in his haste, crashing into the slick cement. He whips his head up, too far away, too late, as the stranger disappears fully into the portal, Dick just a few inches away.
“Wait!” Jason cries, still attempting to rise off of his knees. Damn the rain. Damn the weight of his grief. Damn it all, get up. Get up. “Dick, stop! Stop!”
The rain is loud though and there’s a divide between the two of them, mixes of gray, pink, and red light. His brother half turns, watching as the younger stumbles towards him, and Jason can’t hear anything, can hardly process what’s even happening now, but Dick’s lips move in what Jason thinks is, Goodbye, and Jason screams, lunging as his brother fades into the light.
He falls, smashing into the cement once again as he fails to reach for his brother’s hand, and lands where the portal had just been. He lays there on his chest, heaving and attempting to breathe through his helmet, but it’s too hard, too suffocating, and Jason rips it off and flings it as far away from him as he can. His hands clench into fists and he fights back the urge to cry as he slams his fists into the roof. Bam-Bam-Bam.
Something cracks in his knuckles and Jason stops at the pain, shifting back and hanging his head between his knees. There’s a vicious burn in his eyes, his ugly, muddy green eyes, and Jason swipes at them furiously.
“We just got you back,” he whispers through gritted teeth. “We just got you back, Dick, and you, you just-”
A clap of thunder rattles the thin poles of the Coke advertisement as its lights finally flicker out. The night is dark without its glow and Jason is left in obscurity. 
“What have I done?"
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lokittystuckinatree · 3 years
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Assorted Sylki headcanons:
General
Loki is genderfluid, and goes by multiple prounouns, but I’m not sure about Sylvie. Perhaps she is fluid as well, or maybe she’s cis, agender or a trans woman. My current head-canon is that she is AMAB and uses she/they prounouns.
They are both bi/pan (duh), though I headcanon Loki as gray-aro and possibly poly. Once again not sure about Sylvie.
They have a lot of the same hobbies. Both being huge fans of literature, history, science and the arts.
This leads to lots and lots of deep and nerdy conversations.
Ultimate power couple. Could probably take down Thanos by themselves if they teamed up. They laugh together, they fight together, they teach eachother magic and learn some together as well.
I feel like they would develop some healthy competition here. They love eachother enough to be more proud than jealous if one learns something faster or is more natural at a specific skill.
They totally fight for Mobius’s attention. Mobius is just very happy to have two Loki variants in his life to study. (And be besties with of course)
I’m not saying they adopt kid Loki, but I’m not not saying it either...
They have thier ups and downs but always come back to eachother. They are literal soulmates, after all.
Emo
They still ask eachother if they’re okay.
Loki writes her poetry and reads and/or sings her to sleep. She likes to give him massages or use her enchantment to soothe him.
They love slow dancing, though it takes a little effort to get Sylvie onto the dance floor in public. Their song is “if you love me” by Brenda Lee.
He tells her everything about Asgard, reteaches her Asgardian, tells her about the life she could have had. She tells him tales of things she’s seen and he could only dream of.
Then Loki takes her to Asgard. She gets to meet his family. Perhaps they even manage to go back and meet hers.
Loki helps Sylvie trust again, and teaches her how to have fun and be vulnerable. He is the only person she will cry around.
Sylvie helps Loki love himself and opens him up to life paths and ways of thinking he isn’t used to.
I don’t think they’ll have thier happy ending, as much as I want them to. As much as they deserve. So when they are inevitably parted, they console themselves with the knowledge that somewhere, sometime, they are eternal.
But even eternity isn’t forever. In that eternity, they die hand in hand.
Mischief
They cause a LOT of trouble at family gatherings and similar events. They crashed Sif and Valkyrie’s wedding. The heros, Dr. Strange in particular, are fucking fed up with them. The Peters love them.
Everyone is weirded out by their relationship but still somehow ships it. They receive lots of teasing and “go fuck yourself” jokes, as well as the odd “stop touching yourself and concentrate.” Thor definitely finds it weirdest.
Sick of people assuming they’re related, Loki and Sylvie start playing along and introduce themselves as siblings just to see the horror on people’s faces when they’re caught kissing.
But sometimes they’ll use illusion projection to have some (Ahem) fun in public and/or avoid being walked in on.
Matching outfits. Enough said. Honestly if we don’t get to see both of them donning the full costume in season two...
They shape shift into eachother sometimes to either annoy other people or annoy eachother. On a smaller scale, they’ll sometimes switch their hair colors or headpieces for a laugh.
Trick tournaments. They know eachother so well that is nearly impossible to lie to the other. So they make a challenge of it. They compete to see who can prank or fool who first. The winner gets a...ahem...special treat that night. They’re both incredible actors, so these games get intense.
They tease eachother constantly. This banter can get quite mean, but they both know it’s out of love.
Spicy (18+)
These two have two kinds of sex: tearful, tender lovemaking, and the wildest kinkiest shit conceivable. We’re talking shapeshifting, consensual enchantment, illusions, knife play, and some of the strangest and most messed up foreplay you can imagine.
Some of their faves include King and Queen (on Asgard’s throne), twincest (you know they would), conjuring an illusion they’re fucking in front of everyone they know...walking around in public appearing naked to eachother but clothed to everyone else...
It’s also very good sex. They know exactly what the other wants and how. And they have a lot of it. Everywhere. And in the strangest places. You can’t even imagine the situations they’ve been caught in.
Oh and they’re both switches. Sometimes he’ll dominate her and she’ll finally trust someone else to be in control. Sometimes she’ll peg him. Remind him just how powerful she is, as if he needs reminding.
Loki does this all the time, but sometimes Sylvie will change up her genitals for a twist. Or her species.
When it’s rough, it’s rough. Scratching, screaming, roughhousing, biting. Lots and lots of biting.
When it’s tender, it’s tender. Loki whispers softly in asgardian. Sylvie admits things she never has before. They trace patterns on skin. Kiss tears away.
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amendments · 3 years
Text
Pro vs Anti-shipping opinions from someone who is Neutral...and will get canceled on both sides anyway
It’s fair and 100% ok to deem ships that are problematic, “problematic”, and be uncomfortable with them...and maybe even try to discourage people from shipping them, but you absolutely do not have the right to act like an authoritarian little sh!t and dictate what people can and can’t do. Block and move on.
Proshippers can effectively draw/write/create whatever they want. This is the internet and no matter how much you whine and complain, the internet isn’t going to adopt a pro-censorship stance. However, if you create content for an obviously disgusting pair, you’re going to get criticism, and people are going to find you creepy. You will be judged, even if you’re using your ship as a coping mechanism. No one is free from it.
Criticism, suggestions, and expression of discomfort are NOT BULLYING. If someone doesn’t like your ship, too bad. However, if you’re blatantly telling someone to kay why ess, hurt themselves, giving them some type of violent threat, or are doxxing them, you’re a disgusting person and no better than the people who commit said actions you’re against.
If you’re a proshipper and bullying kids, you’re also apart of the problem. Be the bigger person and block/report.
No, not all proshippers are creeps, some are just people who are anti-censorship, sick of PC culture and ship said ships out of spite, and/or don’t actually like anything bad themselves.
No, not all antis are annoying harassers, stalkers, or minors, some are people who are genuinely concerned about the questionable work you put out or may expose to minors/victims. Also, the lack of restrictions of minors in NSFW spaces is...sus -_-
Yes, there are predators in proship spaces, but there are also predators in antiship spaces, and literally everywhere else on the internet. This isn’t a ship problem, it’s a fandom problem.
Antis who claim that neutral people are just as bad as proshippers, actually push us away. You aren’t making us want to side with you. In fact, you’re doing the opposite. Most people who are neutral/position-less are actually people who really don’t care. Why? Because ships and fandoms don’t engulf our lives, and we actually have more important things to worry about than bullsh!t that strangers online are fighting about.
No, not saying anything or having a position on a topic is not inherently condoning it, it’s just not involving yourself in the problem. -_- It’s hard to really speak about something that’s not on your radar.
No, literally nobody in real life cares, or will care, about this debate. Most people (surprise, surprise) don’t really care about fandoms in general. (Amazing I know). Frankly, I’ve seen people on both sides that are waaaay to invested in this discourse and need to go outside. If you are super passionate about literal internet discourse, go to the park and touch grass.
Antis who are minors, I can genuinely tell you, that no, bosses in the real world really don’t care about what their employees do as hobbies outside of work. If you actually tried to contact employers about NSFW art (of fictional characters) that an employee drew on their own free time, unless you give them actual evidence of them acting inappropriately towards real people, they will ignore you. It is only a concern if that person has actually expressed illegal behavior which could put actual people in danger. (BDSM art of All Might and Deku isn’t going to get someone fired).
Antis, yeah, people will find problematic ships gross, if you tell someone about them. But, unless they are actively involved in internet fandom culture, which the vast majority of people aren’t, they’ll completely forget about it 5 mins later.
Proshippers, no, people in real life don’t care about what you ship in your private life, but if you make your whole identity about your ship, or proshipping, people will think you’re a creep. You’re chronically online. Get a hobby outside of internet discourse.
I will unfollow problematic people, and people who have caused harm, but if you tag me because I’m following a proshipper, simply because they are a proshipper, and have not actually been a perve to real children, I’m not unfollowing them. And if you pester me about it, I will unfollow, block, and report YOU. Who I follow is my business, and I will not tolerate being harassed over Twitter drama. Buzz off.
I will also not unfollow someone who identifies as an anti, or simply criticized your ship if you do not give me evidence of them actually harassing people. I am allowed to have an opinion and engage with people who have similar disapproving opinions. Who I choose to interact with is my business alone.
I’m not un-tweeting a tweet just because a self proclaimed “proshipper” or “anti” tweeted it. Good art is good art, and good takes are good takes.
Some of you overuse the word “p£do” in references to ships. I don’t care how you view it, a ship between an adult and a minor that has a 2-3 year age gap is not p€dop1llic. This age gap is completely common among teenagers in real life, and you’re honestly sheltered if you think that’s automatically predatory. A 16 year old dating an 18 year old is a LOT less worse than a 20 year old dating a 30 year old, and the latter isn’t any less predatory or weird just because they’re both adults.
No, ships between two adults with a very large age gap, are technically not p€doph1llic, either. They may be predatory in nature, and you may perceive them as wrong and gross, but if it ain’t already illegal in real life, then it definitely ain’t on paper.
It doesn’t matter if she’s 1000 years old, we all know what the underlying intention of that character design is, buddy.
Speaking of underlying intentions, there’s a lot of unspoken racism and xenophobia rampant in anti-spaces...like more so than in pro-ship spaces. Racism is everywhere in fandoms, but white, western antishippers are...a particular breed...oozing with arrogance and ethnocentrism.
Thanks for reading my rambling novel if you made it to the end, this is just a venting post. I hate discourse.
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kwonhoshi0 · 3 years
Text
𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐢 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 | h.c
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navigation | requests : open | 26th feb 2021 | part 1
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pairing : todoroki x fem!reader
genre : very fluffy, teensy bit of angst
themes : mutual pining, violence, tiny bit clichè,
request : heyy can you do a todoroki and bakugo, bestfriends to lovers troupe ? fem reader please >:)) feel free to decline or anything !!
quirk : telekinesis, you get lightheaded when you use too much and your nose bleeds
note : you are all mights neice, you live with him. you don’t have parents and in this storyline you move into the dorms after the USJ attack
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[ todoroki ]
> honestly he didn’t understand the difference between bestfriends and what he was feeling
> he thought what he was feeling for you was normal since he’s never had a bestfriend before pain
> he met you around 2 years before you got into UA
-> meeting you
> you were waiting outside of a meeting room your uncle was in and you weren’t the only one
> you weren’t allowed to actually go into the meeting room so you sat outside opposite the dual haired boy
> his hair reminded you of a candycane
> you were curious as to why you hadn’t see him there before especially if his parent is a pro
> you tried not to look at him too much but it was near impossible when he looks the way he does
> you opted to just play with your rings instead you didn’t want to freak him out
> after a couple minutes he noticed your gaze shifted from your rings to the setting sky and since you were too immersed in the red and pink clouds you didn’t notice him staring at you
> honestly i think he loved you from then, watching your eyes light up at the sky was so endearing he didn’t want to look away
> imagine someone being that in love with you i’m so sad rn i’m sorry
> a couple minutes later your uncle walked out of the room along with a couple other heroes including the flame hero endeavor
> ‘shoto i’ll be bringing you along to these meetings often!’
> his voice was loud while the boy looked sick of him, he gritted his teeth a little agreeing
> so that’s why you hadn’t seen him here before
> ‘young y/n! ah this is shoto todoroki you’ll be seeing a lot more of him, endeavor and i have agreed on training you together’
> you have wanted to become a pro-hero like your uncle and since they’re busy it’d be easier having one of them take turns each week
> the heroes explained to shoto that no one can know your last name or your connection to all might since it makes it dangerous for you
> during training you noticed how similar you are, you were both quite reserved and quiet at first
> the first time you talked to him was during your 4th or 5th training session and it was because all might told you to try be more open to friends
> ‘um, hi’
> ‘hello’
> and that’s how you got here
> your friendship was one people only wished to have
> whenever todoroki came around you were both a whole new level of chaotic
> your go to was to either watch terrible films together and make fun of them or bake together
> you were watching the kissing booth and you had to pause it every couple minutes to stop yourself from cringing so much
> he laughed watching your disgusted expression
> he loved seeing your nose scrunch up at the terrible scenes
> you’re not the only one who cringed ‘y/n please pause it again, that was disgusting i need a moment’
> when baking it was usually biscuits and it always resulted in you getting flour everywhere
> ‘wait wait shoto we need to add more sugar’
> ‘uhh but we used all the sugar’
> ‘fuck’ chaos
> whenever shoto had a bad day with his father he knew your house was always open to him
> the first time he got upset he came to you, you opened the door and immediately let him in
> ‘i can’t, i can’t live in that house with him’ you let him cry in your arms when he needed to
> to cheer him up you ate soba together and devised very well thought out plans on how to annoy the fuck out of endeavor
> you went over to todoroki’s as well usually when endeavor wasn’t home so he wouldn’t make you train
> fuyumi and natsuo were the first to notice your closeness and they never made fun of you for it but often said ‘they’re going to fall in love’
> there have been moments you’ll cherish
> when watching a movie marathon there have been many times when all might has come home to your head on todoroki’s shoulder while his head is on yours, you’re both fast asleep
> he draped a blanket over the both of you before telling endeavor he’ll drop shoto off later and that you’re busy training together
> when you first joined UA he finally made a few more friends as did you, at first you were worried that you’d grow apart but thankfully yoi didn’t
> during lunch you always met up after eating, you had gotten a lot closer with the bakusquad but still found time to be together
> walking towards the lunch hall he noticed you walking with midoriya, he was about to speed up to catch up with you guys but you went into a room together and he got very confused
> he went to his usual table ( dekutable )
> when you guys came back he innocently said ‘where were you guys’
> midoriya fumbled over his words while you replied ‘had to ask all might about some homework’ since only todoroki knows about your connection to the pro-hero you had to keep it discreet
> but now midoriya knows as well since he’s the next successor, since todoroki didn’t know that he got suspicous when he saw you heading out the training rooms together, what he didn’t see was all might walking out soon after
> he didn’t understand why this affected him so much, you’re his friend and midoriya is his friend so why does he feel rage when he sees you with him
> at one point he had enough and walked into the room you and midoriya had been going to every lunch ‘are you going to tell me what you’re hiding?’
> inside was you a very scared midoriya and a skeleton form all might
> yeah you had to explain everything but all might wasn’t mad since it’s shoto he knows he can trust him, you’ve trusted him with your name and secrets and he hasn’t said a word
> let’s just say shoto slept very well that night knowing you weren’t secretly dating midoriya
> speaking of that night you walked back to the dorms together, the sunset looked the same as the day you met him
> you got back to your room and sat on your bed after kicking your shoes off
> he watched you as you picked a movie, smiling a little at your pout
> ‘why’re you smiling at me like that icyhot’
> ‘hm just, feel happy’ you looked at him and layed your head in his lap as the light through the window hit your face
> he brought a hand to your forehead and ran his fingers through your hair slightly scratching at your scalp
> you hummed bringing your arms around his waist as he smiled down at you touchstarved, same
> you let the movie play and his eyes were stuck on the screen, you looked up at him and just admired him
> you knew your feeling for him haven’t changed since you met him but that doesn’t matter as long as this doesn’t change
> ‘y/n?’
> ‘hm’
> ‘what happened to that nickname you used to call me, candy cane?’
> ‘do you want me to call you it again’ you could see blush on his cheeks
> ‘yeah, i liked it..it made me feel closer to you’
> you felt your heart swell at his words and you buried your face into his stomach as you felt it heat up
> he giggled at the feeling and pryed your face away from his ticklish stomach, he was now cupping your face
> his grey and blue eyes were stuck in your own [c] eyes
> it was as if you understood what you both wanted, he leaned down a little and when you lifted your head up he knew you wanted this too
> he brought your face towards his own and closed the gap between you both, his lips were gentle against your own
> you both smiled into the kiss
> ‘things won’t change right?’
> ‘never, we’ll only get closer’
> you nudged your nose against his and pecked him again before laying back into his lap
> you talked about how dumb you’ve both been and how long you’ve liked each other before
> an hour later you felt deep breathes coming from him, looking up he had fallen back onto the bed and was asleep with a small smile on his face
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A/N :
i will literally never find real love bexause tHIS is so hard to come by and that :) is :) pain :)
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taglist : @todoroki-shoto-is-life @blazedbakugou @luluwiie @blue-gold-demigod-clouds @gazelle-des-pres
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Note
If it's alright can we get some married headcannons for Beel?
Beel:
-Every time Beel gets reminded he’s s/o’s husband, he starts to smile. It just makes him so happy to know that he belongs to them and vice versa. Like s/o will catch him smiling to him self and they’ll ask what’s got him smiling so much and he’ll just turn to the, and say “we’re married.”
-Weeks before he and his s/o’s wedding anniversary, he leaves little reminders around everywhere for himself so he doesn’t forget their anniversary. (He would literally never forgive himself if he did, but if his s/o forgot he’d be so forgiving.) For anniversaries he always gets s/o a bouquet of their favourite flowers, even if they’re from the human world, and arranges a special dinner.
-He isn’t always the best at remembering special dates, but he is good at remembering his s/o’s likes and favourite things, like food and movies. It makes getting them gifts really easy, and it’s quite common to come home with a gift for s/o because he saw it and thought they would like it.
-Beel struggles sometimes when it comes to cooking due to eating the ingredients before they e en making it into the dish, but for his s/o he will stay in kitchen for as long as necessary in a cooking apron to make sure they can have a tasty homemade meal together.
-Type of couple that would end up taking in stray animals of all kinds, because both Beel and his s/o are susceptible to animals in need and wouldn’t be able to refuse one another if they brought one home. Satan hangs around a lot because they always have a cat or two in the house.
-Belphie, who also hangs around a lot, is a mix between “can you guys settle down with the lovey dovey stuff I’m going to be sick,” and “I’m so glad that Beel’s happy.” It depends on the day, but if they wake him up due to ‘lovey dovey stuff’ he’s going to be annoyed.
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Note
in your expert opinion what are some of the most destiel-heavy episodes of spn? i stopped watching around season 7 and have no interest in engaging w the plot of the show at all but i’m in the mood for some gay yearning ykwim
Hi anon! Thank you for reaching out to me about this, I’m, no-joke, very flattered. I’d seen a couple posts on this same question, very thorough and detailed lists on Destiel-centric episodes, but at the moment I cannot find any of them, that would’ve answered your request much faster. So, in advance, sorry, my reply is probably coming in extremely late, but I did write this from scratch, so yeah.
Even though storylines in SPN can be very shitty and hollow, I do feel that to get the full Destiel experience -that long-drawn yearning- one would have to watch the entirety of the show, even if Cas isn’t in the episode or if there’s no explicit mention of their relationship/bond because it gives you a better understanding of them as characters and of how their relationship affects the narrative.
Now, you mentioned you stopped around S7, which is completely understandable and justified given the Dick plot game was very weak and, in my opinion, annoying (so little Cas!). I’m going to start listing from S7 in case you want to refresh your SPN before jumping straight into unseen episodes. Also, since you mentioned no interest in the plot and are specifically craving those sweet crumbs of gay yearning, I’ll skip most one-sided / too subtle episodes and cut to the chase.
Lastly, I hate spoiling things, but you’ve probably seen it all on Tumblr. I tried to keep the episodes’ descriptions short, as it might come in useful. Stuck to key words, quotes and/or little comments.
 Season 7
7x01 – Meet the New Boss: Godstiel, sincere apology. Cas: “I'm gonna find some way to redeem myself to you.”
7x02 – Hello, Cruel World: Mourning. Trench coat melancholy. The heart-wrenching eulogy: “Dumb son of a bitch.”
7x17 – The Born-Again Identity: Emmanuel!Cas, reunion, longing, hurt.
7x21 – Reading is Fundamental: Honey!Cas, hug, hurt, reunion, that painful SORRY (board game) scene.
7x23 – Survival of the Fittest: Honey!Cas, forgiveness, adorable, wified Cas. Dean hits us with: “Nobody cares that you're broken, Cas!" but also “I'd rather have you, cursed or not.”
Season 8 (this season is so good and Destiel is the driving motor of it, I swear. If you can, watch it complete.)
8x01 – We Need to Talk About Kevin: Dean in Purgatory looking for the angel.  Cas is referred to as “your [Dean’s] angel.”
8x02 – What’s Up, Tiger Mommy?: HUG!!!, Purgatory reunion, face touch, very romantic. Monster: “ You'll find your angel there.” //  Dean: “Let me bottom-line it for you. I'm not leaving here without you.”
8x05 – Blood Brother: Cas vs. Benny cat fight lol. Dean: “Cas... we're gonna shove your ass back through the eye of that needle if it kills all three of us.”
8x07 – A Little Slice of Kevin: Cas comes back from Purgatory, but before that Dean starts seeing him in places. Very tragic; hallucinating your dead significant other trope. Has That boner scene. Dean: “I did everything I could to get you out! EVERYTHING!” Cas helps Dean see what truly happened in Purgatory and not his self-altered memories. PACKED!
8x08 – Hunteri Heroici: Hilarious, romantic, intimate. Dean and Cas have an heart to heart. They actually communicate. Cas “I’ll watch over you.”
8x10 Torn and Frayed: They work a case together, and when I say heart eyes…
8x17 – Goodbye Stranger: THIS. EPISODE. Dean “I need you.”
8x19 – Taxi Driver: Separation. Naomi to Dean: "You're hoping Castiel will return to you. I admire your loyalty; I only wish he felt the same way."
8x22 – Clip Show: Lack of trust, hurt, tense interactions. Romantic too (basically, Cas gets Dean an apology basket).
8x23 – Sacrifice: Meaningful conversation and a gay couple hit by Cupid parallel. Dean “So this is it? E.T goes home?"
 Season 9
9x01 – I think I’m Gonna Like it Here: Dean prays to Cas IN.A.CHAPEL. Worry, longing, separation. Dean “Please, man, I need you here.”
9x03 – I’m No Angel: Human!Cas and jealous!Dean.
9x06 – Heaven Can’t Wait: Human!Cas TEXT-BOOK LONGING. GAY AS FUCK. Gazing, touching, they even TALK (for real).
9x09 – Holy Terror: Adorable Cas, flirty vibes, happyish, funny. Cas: “Cas is back in town!”
9x10 – Road Trip: Cas comforts Dean, Cas and Crowley bitching at each other, overall protective!Cas.
9x18 – Metafiction. Cas finds out about the Mark of Cain.
9x21 – King of the Damned: Hug, strong boyfriends vibes.
9x22 – Stairway to Heaven: Cas gives up an entire army, for Dean. Metatron about Cas “He's in love………………………. with humanity.”
9x23  – Do You Believe in Miracles?: At this point, it’s canon stated that Cas will do anything and lose everything if that means saving Dean. Metatron to Cas “You draped yourself in the flag of heaven, but ultimately, it was all about saving one human, right?”
 Season 10
10x01 – Black: Demon!Dean and sick/brokenhearted Cas in a slutty robe missing his man.
10x03 – Soul Survivor: ICONIC. Angel on Demon action! Cas turns down Hannah because he’s too gay and in love. Intimate Deancas talk.
10x05 – Fan Fiction: No Cas, but Destiel references. 
10x09 – The Things We Left Behind: That.Lunch.Date. Deancas introduction to co-parenting.
10x14 – The Executioner’s Song: We get Daddy Murder aka Cain. This is a Pivotal episode to understand Dean’s character development. Plus, it has Deancas interactions.
10x16 – Paint It Black: No Cas, but Dean opens up in confessionary; repressed BISEXUAL AS FUCK.
10x18 – Book of the Damned: Charlie meets Cas. Gay energies everywhere. Cute domestic little scene.
10x20 – Angel Heart: PARENTING! Essential to understand Cas from this point forward.
10x22 – The Prisoner: Just… just watch it. One of THEE Destiel episodes.
10x23 – Brother’s Keeper: No Deancas interactions but it’s the finale, and I recommend watching it because next season takes off literally right from here. No time jumps.
 Season 11
11x02 – Form and Void: Could skip to the very end which is when Cas comes back.
11x03 – The Bad Seed: Cursed!Cas. Dean takes care of him, even wraps him in a blanket. He also cradles his face. Extreme Hurt/Comfort. Jacting joices rejoice.
11x10 – The Devil in the Details: Could skip but has Casifer in it. Interesting to see his dynamic with Dean.
11x18 – Hell’s Angel: Casifer. Dean "It? It's not an it, Sam, it's Cas!"
11x23 – Alpha and Omega: Huggg! Cas willing to go on a guaranteed suicide mission with Dean. Very tender and sad.
 Season 12
12x02 – Keep Calm and Carry On: ANOTHER HUG! Dean presents his boyfriend to his mom<3 Soft and romantic.
12x09 – First Blood: Reunion hug<3, Cas pining… as in he counts his every minute without Dean.
12x10 – Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets: Direct parallel with canon couple. Crystal-clear mutual affection. One of the best. Angel Ishim to Cas about Dean “I'm gonna help you. I'm gonna cure you of your human weakness same way I cured my own… by cutting it out.”
12x12 – Stuck in the Middle with You: A dying Cas confesses his love. “I love you. I love all of you.”
12x19 – The Future: We find out Dean gave Cas a MIXTAPE!!! Very romantic and full of yearning, also worry and what could be seen as a betrayal (ish…).
12x23 – All Along the Watch Tower: Hands down, one of the most distressing Destiel episodes. Cas dies.
 Season 13
13x01 – Lost and Found: This is the worst because you have Dean trying to assimilate Cas’ death. Core of Dean’s widow’s arc. Jack introduction, that’s their new kid.
13x02 – The Rising Son: Widow’s arc (you could skip it, but why would you?).
13x03 – Patience: Widow’s arc (you could skip it, but why would you?). Dean to Sam “He manipulated him, he made him promises, said, ‘paradise on earth’ and Cas bought it and you know what that got him? It got him dead! Now you might be able to forget about that, but I can’t!”
13x04 – The Big Empty: Continuation of widow’s arc and Cas wakes up in the Empty. The Empty to Cas: "I know who you love. There's nothing for you back there." // Dean to Sam “I need you to keep the faith, for both of us. ‘Cause right now, I… Right now, I don’t believe in a damn thing.”
13x05 – Advanced Thanatology: Suicidal and hopeless Dean gets his win. Cas comes back. Gives me the chills.
13x06 – Tombstone: COWBOY BOYFRIENDS!
13x14 – Good Intentions: Happy and fun Destiel scene. So Very Married.
13x23 – Let The Good Times Roll: Season finale, Dean talks about retiring (plans include Cas of course) and just very nice to see them interact.
Season 14
14x03 – The Scar: Reunion.
14x08 – Byzantium: Deanand Cas dealing with their child’s death, then bringing him back by Cas making a deal with the Empty. IMPORTANT EPISODE.
14x09 – The Spear: Cas uses the royal We – married behavior.
14x10 – Nihilism: Dean is stuck in his own mind, and Cas and Sam try to bring him back. Cas “Please, you have to -- you have to try to remember, because the people in your life -- in your real life, out there -- we need you to come back.”
14x12 – Prophet and Loss: Dean gets his very own Dr. Sexy, aka Dr. Cas.
14x14 – Ouroboros: Basically another date (their kid tags along) and They TALK. Very intimate and established marriage vibes.
14x18 – Absence: Shits starts to go south. [ Dean: “Who cares what Jack said? We don't know what happened! But I swear, if he did something to her, if she is -- (points to Castiel) Then you're dead to me. (Castiel looks crushed after Dean says that).]
14x20 – Moriah: Tense and very upsetting. Relationship very damaged.
 Season 15 (I would advise watching the entire season because it relies heavily on Destiel. They’re the heart and the emotional motor leading the plot onwards.)
15x01 – Back and To The Future: Deancas’ in the aftermath of their kid’s death. Tension gets worse.
15x02 – Raising Hell: Tension rises, this is very intense. Cas “Dean. You asked, "What about all of this is real?" We are.”
15x03 – The Rupture: Breaking point ends in divorce.
15x06 – Golden Time: Painful phone call which speaks volumes about the current state of their relationship at the time. Also, good to see where they’re standing and how they’re coping.
15x08 – Our Father Who Aren’t in Heaven: Strained relationship so obvious they’re offered couples’ therapy.
15x09 – The Trap: MASTERPIECE. Back to Purgatory. Can (and is) taken as Dean’s love confession (because it is). 
15x12 – Galaxy Brain: So married. Little domestic date, you can see LOVE written in their faces.
15x13 – Destiny’s Child: AU!Dean and Sam. Not a yearning episode per se, but AU!Dean? SO GAY.
15x17 – Unity: God reveals that the only act of free will in any universe he ever created has been Cas choosing Dean.
15x18 – Despair: Cas confesses his love to Dean.
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