#god i have the *biggest* crush on Nat from L@L | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

lovelyirony · 4 years

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Moony-Eyed

@bironfam i hope this is okay!

Tony didn’t think that their new astronaut was going to be anything special.

Well.

That’s a lie.

You kind of have to be special if you’re going to be an astronaut for NASA. You have to keep your cool, have good eyesight, and be okay with the possibility of dying. Maybe. Maybe you have to be cool with that.

Tony is rather good at his job. From revolutionizing how space suits are made to making the functions of the ship easier to manage, Tony is NASA’s secret weapon, the handyman of all handymen.

He’s usually squirreled away in his workshop, at his apartment that he honestly needs to clean far more than he does, or arguing with Potts about why he needs eight different coffee mugs.

They know him as a guy who doesn’t exactly give a rat’s ass about the chain of command, or dress code.

“You can’t fire me,” he had told Happy, after he had tried once again to stop Tony from entering areas containing sensitive information in sweatpants and a sweatshirt that proclaimed him the “MIT class of 1992.”

Tony is good at his job, nearly too good. He likes it that way.

But back to the astronaut.

Danvers had taken leave to take care of her family, and honestly? Space usually isn’t a lifetime event for astronauts. You see too much of it, you need time away. A lot of time away.

Pepper is giddy. She loved Carol, but Carol was happily married with a baby girl, and this one? This one wasn’t.

Not that Pepper was looking for anyone. No, she and her partner Nat had standing date nights every Saturday evening, and she loved them too much to even think about anything else.

But Tony? Tony needed someone. He never really dated anybody, at least not anybody that he genuinely liked.

Stark was a powerful name, and it got tossed around a little bit, but Tony mostly kept to himself and only responded to it when he was at a party or Happy was mad at him for forgetting his ID badge yet again.

James Rhodes was a nicely built man with a strong, confident aura, and single.

(Pepper had checked.)

She thought that he and Tony would get along quite well, if anything.

James is shifting uncomfortably in his seat. He’d rather just get to work on what he needs to do. Getting into the air is one of the best feelings, and the sooner he can experience it, the sooner he’ll be fine.

He always pushed the limits, and space is just the last limit he gets to push. He’s excited. He’s always wanted to work for NASA, be on their roster of astronauts. He wants little kids who identify with him to know that they can do it too.

So he’s ready to work with the best and brightest of their era.

“Where the fuck are my nachos?!”

His head whips around to a man who is wearing an ill-fitting cardigan (that is most likely not his), old jeans that have what look to be equations written on one thigh, and glasses that are most definitely broken sitting at an angle.

“Your nachos were too close to the computers,” one woman says without looking up. “Stop bringing nachos here or I’m going to fucking kill you.”

“You can’t kill me,” the man retorts.

“Tony,” comes another voice. James turns and sees who must be Pepper Potts. “Go to your office. Now. Change your pants, you wrote on them again.”

“I did?”

He looks down and swears.

“Son of a bitch!” He then looks at Jim. “Wait, who are you? Are you the new astronaut?”

“Uh, yes? I’m James.”

He sticks out his hand.

Who seems to be Tony stares at his hand.

“Your name is seriously James?”

“Do you think I’m bad at jokes?” he asks, eyebrows raised.

Tony grins.

“No, I think you’re gonna be a riot. But I’m not calling you James.”

“Jim, then.”

“No,” Tony says. “You’re not an old man, you’re still attractive.”

His eyebrows raise.

Tony’s face pales.

“I’m going to. Go. I have math on my pants.”

Pepper snorts, readjusting her grip on her clipboard.

“Welcome to NASA, Colonel Rhodes. I can promise you that we don’t usually yell about our lunch location or write on articles of clothing.”

Surprisingly, James doesn’t see Tony for two weeks. Apparently, he’s been working outside with a couple of the interns to calculate some stuff, rework some of the older ships for experience, and stay out of the way of Pepper, who says that he’s attempting to murder her via headaches to deal with.

He seems interesting, however. There are sticky notes and papers all over the offices and breakrooms reminding people of what Tony had for breakfast/lunch/dinner, or where the extra coffee supplies are.

“You provide for him?” he asks Pepper one time.

“He gets too much into his own head sometimes,” Pepper says. “He focuses too much on a program or an improvement and forgets that he works around other people. You wouldn’t believe how many times we had miniature science experiments based off of lunches that he would leave in the fridge.”

Rhodes nods. “Well. I’ll look forward to working with him.”

Tony has been working outside of the office for two reasons:

1.) To legitimately help the interns. (Ned and Peter are making improvements!)

2.) James Rhodes is the hottest guy on earth. Maybe in the universe. For real. Seriously.

He hates Pepper for this. Didn’t even tell Tony what the new astronaut looked like, and then shows up with a god of a man. Rude and unfair.

And he had to be the dumbass with the equation on his pants.

He didn’t even have spare pants! He had to stay in his office for the whole day because the equation was actually really important and he needed it.

“Why didn’t you just transfer it over on paper?” Bruce asks over the phone. Bruce is his friend who works in a technically classified, off-the-books, not-exactly-government-issued building. He’s cool. He also points out the obvious.

“I’m the biggest idiot on the planet,” Tony groans. “There was just a new guy at work, and he threw me off balance, so-”

“What’s he look like?”

“Why, you not crushing on that hot Nordic space dude?”

“No, still am. But I still remember when Barton came to work for you guys and you didn’t know that his name wasn’t George until about six months into him working there.”

“In my defense, he works mostly with physical therapy and prep for no gravity,” Tony says. “I work with math and shit.”

“Still,” Bruce says. “You wouldn’t have pointed him out if you didn’t think he was cute. What’s he like?”

“I...don’t exactly know.”

“Oh my god, you’ve been avoiding him?”

“Oh what, like you didn’t jump out of a window when Thor almost saw you in a tank top?”

“I have a farmer’s tan! Totally different circumstance!”

“Is it?”

“I hate you.”

“Get to dating Thor and then we’ll talk again. Have fun re-revolutionizing green energy, Dr. Banner.”

“Look to the stars, Tony.”

James has to get fitted for his suit.

He faces Tony, who looks quite different from when he first saw him. His hair is somewhat less messy, he has one of those geeky NASA-logo shirts that they sell at Target, and is wearing khaki pants with about a million different pockets.

(Something in his mind is whispering that he definitely shouldn’t find him attractive. But he will anyways.)

“Alright space-cowboy, let’s get your measurements,” Tony says. “You feeling okay today?”

“Right as rain.”

“Rain is never good, sunshine,” Tony quips. “Now, about your nickname from me...hm. Rhodey.”

“How’d you figure that out?”

“Substituted the ‘s’ for a ‘y’, just simple stuff,” he says with a shrug. “You approve?”

“I...guess.”

“Good. Now Rhodey, how are you feeling?”

“Like sunshine and gumdrops,” he responds sarcastically.

Tony smiles, and damn if it makes his heart thump a bit.

“Better answer, soldier. Extend those arms, please.”

Tony smells really nice. Subtle cologne and clean laundry. Rhodey finds that he likes it.

“How’ve you been doing, Tony?”

“Like a gentle breeze on a day that’s seventy-two degrees,” Tony answers. “Work’s been good today. Helen made tacos.”

“I had some of those, they were pretty good.”

“Mm,” Tony answers. “Legs a bit more apart, thank you.”

Rhodey shifts his stance a little bit, carefully not watching Tony bend down just a tad to get the bottom of his foot.

(But oof, that was hard.)

Tony comes back up again, looking into Rhodey’s eyes. For a moment, for a brief moment, his breath is taken away.

“I need to wrap my measuring tape around your waist. You okay with that?”

“More than.”

“Don’t get saucy,” Tony winks. “No one likes more than one floozy at the office, and that’s what got me this job anyways.”

Rhodey lets out a laugh, and Tony grins.

He likes making him laugh. Likes it more than he should.

They spend more and more time together. Tony always makes adjustments, Rhodey realizes that Tony doesn’t exactly keep track of when he eats, so they have lunch together.

They like it a lot.

On good-weather days, they eat outside on a bench. Tony leans against one said, foot brushing Rhodey’s calf, and Rhodey doesn’t really mind because he’ll lean over occasionally and steal whatever Tony’s eating.

“This is theft, you know.”

“You eat like a bird, what do you know about food theft?”

Tony almost always stays later than anyone else except for nights with Rhodey.

Once a month, they have dinner together. Rhodey’s new to the area and Tony’s almost never social with anyone, so they’ve been working through a list of the three-star-rated restaurants and seeing which ones they like.

“It’s kind of like a date,” Pepper says, on her monthly hangout with Tony (and also kind of a clean-up party for his house).

“Not dates,” Tony says. “Just friends. I’m sure he has his eye on someone in or out of the office.”

“Like you?”

“His first impression of me was me writing an equation on my pair of jeans, and then I haven’t exactly upgraded my style since,” Tony deadpans. “He’s seen me in neon orange sweatpants, Pep. You don’t exactly come back from that.”

“Maybe he likes you for who you are!”

“God that’s such a bullshit answer,” Tony whines. “You sound like a straight-to-video movie that came out in 1997!”

“That’s too specific.”

“And? You still get the point!”

Pepper flings a pillow his way.

“Where is your wine?”

“In the same cabinet you always leave it.”

“Goody.”

While Pepper sways to bed, Tony thinks about what she said.

It could be possible. Tony had never exactly asked him about himself in that capacity, but Rhodey never had an odd reaction to a statement that involved talking about a partner of the same-sex or a one-liner about it.

Maybe?

...no.

Guys like Rhodey deserved someone better than someone who forgot to eat lunch four out of the seven days of the week. (And maybe four was being generous.)

On the flipside, Rhodey was currently telling his woes to Carol, who was laughing at him.

“You nerd!” she says. “You like Tony, and you’ve done nothing about it? Have you even told him that you also like guys? Cuffed your pants?”

“No,” Rhodey says. “I just...why would he like someone like me? I’m...boring.”

“You’re not boring,” Carol says.

“Yeah you are!” Maria calls from the kitchen. “You’re very boring, Mr. ‘Only-Drinks-Black-Coffee’!”

Carol giggles.

“Maybe Maria has a point. Maybe.”

Rhodey groans, leaning against the couch.

“I’m so fucked.”

“On the contrary-”

“Oh shut up.”

Pepper is tired of people’s problems. They’re getting closer and closer to launch, and Clint’s out sick and Helen is being weird again, and Jane is off somewhere to a secret government-but-not-government launch to discuss things with two potential boyfriends. (Maybe boyfriends. Maybe.)

Tony is getting stressed.

Usually, he’s the only one who’s fine during a launch. He’s still cracking jokes, making fun events, and calming down people who are a bit too nervous.

But usually, he’s not as close to the astronaut as this.

He’s been thinking about the accidents they’ve had over the years. He doesn’t want a repeat. He’s been pulling all-nighters, avoiding sleep, and checking in on Rhodey consistently, to the point where Rhodey has to drag him outside and tell him that things will be fine.

(In Pepper’s professional opinion, they’d be fine if they just did a goodbye kiss or whatever, but okay.)

Tony’s getting into his own head.

So is Rhodey.

He’s going to be gone for a long time. He’s going to miss the holidays. And Tony won’t be able to talk to him everyday.

“You should tell him,” Pepper murmurs. “I think you both would benefit from it.”

“I’m not going to play that unfair card,” Rhodey murmurs back. “I either confess my love and go to a dangerous mission knowing that he loves me back and I said it when I can’t return, or he doesn’t and I just played a guilt-trip card.”

“It’s not like that.”

“Isn’t it?”

Rhodey shakes his head.

“I...I can’t do that to him. Wouldn’t be right. After the mission.”

“After, then,” Pepper says. “When you come home.”

Rhodey grins.

The day of launch happens far quicker than anyone wants it to, most of all Tony.

Pepper actually kicked him out of his office, told him to shower, and wear something nice for once.

“Make sure he knows he has someone to come home to,” Pepper says. “Wear your turtleneck!”

“It’s only September,” Tony scowls. “And he’s his own person who’s about to launch himself into space.”

“He will be fine,” Pepper says. “With your research and work, we’ve cut down overlooked mistakes by about forty percent.”

“Still not half.”

“Because we’re NASA,” Pepper sniffs. “Our mistakes matter more, so we make less of them.”

Tony nods.

He ends up almost being late to the launch because of Pepper’s stupid wardrobe advice.

He’s wearing his nicest pair of pants, a button-up that’s been at the back of his closet for quite some time, and he’s feeling stupid because he had to play AC/DC in the car so he would actually focus on what was going on.

Now he’s waiting for Rhodey to exit wearing the space suit that he made and to tell everyone that it was an honor and a privilege to be going to space where things happen and Tony can’t be there to help.

Life sucks.

But it goes on, and there’s Rhodey in the brilliantly-designed suit, and Tony’s never been more proud and more sad, but he sucks up his tears and walks up anyways.

“Hey space-cowboy. Ready to explore the frontier?”

“As ever,” Rhodey says. “You ready to forget to eat your lunch all over again?”

Tony smiles.

“You’ll have to check in with me soon, then,” Tony says. “Cut the mission short?”

Rhodey laughs.

“Wish I could. But I’ll send you pictures,” he says. “I promise.”

Tony stops for a moment, smile dropping from his face.

“Promise me one more thing.”

“Anything,” Rhodey says. “Anything you want.”

“Come back safe. Swear to me that you will.”

Rhodey grins.

“Safe and sound, honey. Safe and sound.”

Tony watches him board the ship, wave to the cameras, and wink at him.

He rolls his eyes, but blows a kiss anyways.

Tony’s a nervous wreck.

Pepper has decided that Rhodey needs to not go on missions anymore, or at least take Tony with him because he’s annoying.

“Can you stop crying on the second floor bathroom? It’s getting annoying,” Pepper says. “Clint says he can hear you and feels bad.”

“Well how are we supposed to know that Rhodey’s okay?!” Tony says. “For all I know, he could be dead!”

“I really hope you don’t mean that,” comes a voice from behind.

Tony whips around, seeing Rhodey’s grainy face from the big screen.

“You bitch!”

He laughs, and it doesn’t sound real, but he can see him.

“Hey Tony. You been making sure no one is pissed at you for forgetting your dinner in the fridge?”

“Well, now I will,” he admits. “I’ve missed you.”

“I missed you too,” Rhodey smiles. “How’s everything been down there?”

“Boring,” Tony says. “When are you coming back?”

“I got about two more months,” Rhodey says. “And then I’ll be back.”

“Quit hogging all the screen time,” Natasha teases. “You lovebirds can have your moment on earth.”

Tony blinks.

“What.”

But by that time, Natasha and Sam have already been asking a million questions, and Pepper is filling Rhodey in on what he’s missed.

Tony is still stuck on the whole ‘lovebirds’ thing that Natasha suggested.

...that couldn’t be possible. And yet if other people saw it that way...

“Tony? Tony?”

He blinks again, looking back up at the screen.

Rhodey is smiling at him, that smile that means that he’s happy to see someone.

“I’ll see you soon, honey.”

“Right back at you, space-cowboy.”

The screen goes to black, and Tony smiles a bit.

“Aw, you nerd,” Clint teases. “So, you gonna ask him out on a date?”

“Clint, I will cut off your leg,” Tony says cheerily. “I have to go finish some paperwork!”

Tony’s done all of his paperwork, it’s one of the few times that Pepper’s had it done on time.

He has to keep doing things to stop thinking about Rhodey.

He writes him letters. He knows that he won’t ever read them, but writing letters helps and sometimes it makes his hands less jittery.

He’s not ever going to send them. Ever. Letters are cheesy and they feel...personal.

Pepper tells him that he’s being lame.

“I’m not being lame!” Tony cries. “I am just. Protecting myself!”

“You have the reasoning of a Jane Austen love interest,” she says flatly. “I swear if you don’t tell him, then I’ll meddle. And you know how bad I am when I meddle.”

“You literally have made things so much worse for so many people,” Tony responds.

“Not worse, per se.”

“Oh right, how could I forget?” Tony exclaims sarcastically. “You made things the worst.”

“If we weren’t such good friends, you’d be dead,” Pepper says.

“Then let’s be worst enemies,” Tony mutters. “You still ready for pizza night?”

“Yeah, I’m ready,” Pepper says. “Meet at your place at seven, right?”

“Right.”

Here is what Tony does not know: Rhodey’s coming back down earlier than expected, and Pepper knows this.

So she’s been busying Tony with work while she’s acclimating Rhodey to life on earth again.

“Has he really missed me?” Rhodey asks for about the twentieth time in about two hours.

“Yes,” Pepper says. “I hope these aren’t your talking points for your interviews. If people know you’re this much of a love-struck idiot in real life, they won’t take you seriously.”

“I just missed him!”

“Oh sure,” she responds, rolling her eyes. “And I’m sure you’ll tell the news reporters that you missed me with as many stars in your eyes as now. You like him, you absolute geek.”

“Well, maybe a little,” Rhodey mutters. “But you’re sure he’ll like the surprise?”

“One hundred percent.”

Tony is having, perhaps, the worst day in his life. Maybe in history, if he’s being quite honest.

His car, for one thing, won’t start for more than is done-away-with concern, so he has to call Pepper and say that he’s going to be late since he has to fix his own car.

“Will you get coffee on the way here?” Pepper asks.

“Your usual order?”

“Yeah, you know the drill.”

Then the line is long because some stupid person wanted to complain, and Tony was this close to just threatening to buy the entire store to make it stop, and he cried on his way to work because he saw a duck cross the road and it reminded him of how Rhodey crashed his first car avoiding a duck that was crossing the road.

Yeah. It’s rough.

Then he parks in the wrong parking spot because some asshole with a stupid rental car took his usual spot, and then he stepped in a puddle.

He hates today.

“Pepper!” he declares as he enters the building. “I wore jeans today, I got your coffee, and I’m already done with the day. I swear to god if one more unexpected thing happens, I’ll just say ‘fuck it’ and go work for the Soviets!”

“The Soviets aren’t a thing, Tones.”

He knows that voice.

He fucking knows that voice. He isn’t supposed to be back from that mission for another month.

Tony doesn’t turn around.

“I’m hallucinating. Oh my god, I’m hallucinating.”

Hands wrap around his neck, hugging him.

“This feel like a hallucination?”

(Okay so Tony drops the coffee.)

Rhodey’s smile is blinding, and he’s...he’s here. Right in front of him with those not-supposed-to-be-that-hot polo shirts, those eyes that he could get lost in, and just...

Well.

He hugs him and he hugs him tightly.

“Why didn’t you tell me you were coming back so soon?!”

“Pepper organized it,” Rhodey says, giddy. “Decided it would be a nice surprise for you.”

Tony looks over at Pepper, who’s trying to hide a grin behind her hands.

“Pepper if I wasn’t so over-the-moon right now, your heels would be snapped.”

She shrugs.

“Worth it. You requested today off, by the way.” She winks as she turns back to her office.

“Well, what do you say?” Rhodey asked. “Help me get used to having my feet back on the ground?”

Tony grins.

“Dinner sounds like a good start. Gotta get you some good earth food, none of that dehydrated crap.”

“Do you know how long it’s been since I had a decent slice of pizza?”

Tony grins.

“I can fix that.”

#lovelyirony writes #YES THE TITLE IS FUCKING PUNNY I'M HILARIOUS WHAT ABOUT IT #rhodeytony #tonyrhodey #ironhusbands #rhfe #rhodey #tony stark #iron man #war machine #pepper potts

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msmarvelwrites · 4 years

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The Winter Ghost - Part 16

Info: A Devastating car crash causes you to lose your memory and start over. The only thing left in the wreckage was the horrific nightmares which plagued your mind. If you knew what today would entail you would have just stayed in bed. But you didn’t and because of that, everything you knew was about to change.

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x reader

Warnings: swearing, violence, mentions of death, fluff.

W/c: 2.3 k

A/n: Welcome back, and Happy Labour Day! We’re winding down here folks, but I’ve got some spicy chapters coming up... Thats all I’m going to say about that. But honestly, the biggest of thank you’s to @cutie1365 for editing those parts because they were rough. I embarassed myself quite afew times. Anyways, enjoy babes!

The sun burned into the cabin windows causing the dust that hovered stagnant in the dull room to sparkle. Bucky had tossed and turned for the past few hours, trying to rest his eyes, but it was to no avail. Instead of torturing himself further by counting ceiling planks, he groaned out of bed and shuffled into the kitchen. It appeared he wasn't the only one having trouble sleeping.

Steve and Wanda hovered over Vision as he sat at the kitchen table, typing into the laptop.

“Sergeant Barnes, I’ve located Agent L/n” The android spoke, freezing Bucky in his tracks.

“You found Y/n?” He stumbled over his feet, joining the three of them as he watched the small red dot on the screen blink slowly. There you were.

“Okay, that's not too far from here. Maybe a half hour right. Keep your comms on, I’ll get packed and head out now-”

“Alone?” Wanda spoke surprised.

“I can handle a couple of Hydra picks. And I’m not risking what happened to Nat to happen again.”

“That's not really up to you, jerk.” Steve sighed. “I’m with ya… Till the end of the line, remember?”

Bucky’s eyes softened at that, watching as a small smile pulled at the corner of Steve's mouth. His relationship with his best friend had been a little rocky these past few weeks to say the least. But for the first time in a long time, he trusted him. Completely and fully. Bucky wasn't alone, not any more.

“Alright, punk. Let's go get her back.”

………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

You squeezed the trigger, wincing as the machine in your hand clicked.

Silence.

You pulled it again, but same as before nothing happened.

“Oh, baby. You're even more ruthless than I remember.” Tommy taunted, holding up the clip in his hands before springing from the floor, charging at you. You quickly dodged him, sending him into the wall behind you.

“You’d really shoot me? After everything we’ve been through. Bucky Barnes must have some pretty good moves. Remind me to ask him when Hydra gets their little pet back.”

You growled, “Take his name out of your mouth.”

“And what about you, baby. Has it been in yours?” He cooed, lunging at you and hammering a stiff punch to your jaw. You stumbled back a few pases, but ultimately regained your balance.

“I trusted you. I loved you!” You screamed, rocketing your leg forward and sweeping it under Tommy’s legs, knocking him down. He gasped on impact, clutching his chest for air.

“Tell me,” He wheezed. “When he touches you, do you think of me?” The small smirk on his thin lips disappeared as you brought your boot down on his throat. He choked and gasped for air, but none came. For a moment you wondered if this was really who you were. A killer, nothing but a numb shell of a woman he had left behind.

You watched as his face turned a deep shade of purple. He furiously clawed at your leg begging for air. It would be so easy. With your strength and a little more added pressure you could completely crush his windpipe. Hell, you're sure you could rip his head clean off, but you didn't want blood on your new combat boots. It’s funny, all this time you were thinking Bucky was the monster. Yet here you stood, Tommy’s life in your hands and there was nothing you'd enjoy more than watching his eyes roll back into his skull. Just like before, only this time there would be no second chances.

The commotion outside the small room had your head snapping up and away from your prey. Gunfire echoed through the hallways, causing you to freeze. As the footsteps neared your room, you made your decision. Tommy would get his one way or another, but not if you died first.

Reluctantly you lifted your boot off his now bruised and raw throat. He drew a jagged breath as the air rushed back into his swollen lungs. You grabbed the mag from across the room and reloaded the gun with a deep click.

“Not a word.” You threatened Tommy, pressing the pistol into his head behind him. If you were going out, it was going to be a bloodbath, starting with his.

The metal door was torn from its hinges in an explosion of dust and concrete.

“I’d pull the trigger if I were you, doll.” His familiar husky voice boomed.

“Bucky?” You all but whispered.

“We’re not killing anyone.” Steve spoke from beside him as he and Wanda walked through the dust filled room.

“You came.” You swallowed down your exhaustion you only now realised was there.

“Of course we came. Couldn't leave my best girl. All though, now I see you can take care of yourself just fine.” Bucky chuckled. You couldn't help the smile that spread across your lips as relief filled your lungs.

“They're gunna’ to kill you.” Tommy coughed out. Bucky’s eyes shot to his, and as if it was the first time he had really realised he was in the room.

“Oh, you must be Tommy. You know, heard great things, but now that we're meeting - officially- I have to say, I’m disappointed.” He took two wide pases to the quivering man, looking down on him. “You're shorter than I thought you'd be.” Bucky half joked.

“Go on Winter Soldier. Do what you do best. Show her who you are.” He breathed, more confidence in his small voice now. He truly had a death wish.

“With pleasure.” Bucky seethed. You prepared yourself for the gruesome image that was about to unfold but the next thing you felt was Bucky’s hands on either side of your arms. When you opened your eyes, his were soft.

This time, you knew who initiated it. You wrapped your hands around the back of his neck and pulled him down to you, crashing your lips onto his. They were soft and rough all at once as he drank you in. His flesh hand quickly lost itself in your hair as he pulled you in deeper. He kissed you softly, but you urged for more, desperate and craving to make up for lost time. He chuckled darkly at your attempt, holding you tight to his chest. He wanted nothing more than to hold you like that and never let go, but there were bigger things at play. Reluctantly, he pulled away as you gasped for breath.

“Wanna get out of here?” Bucky breathed, taking your hands in his. You nodded, completely lost in thought.

“Please.” He signed, following Steve and Wanda out of the room.

“You can't just leave me here!” Tommy shouted.

“Don’t worry, darling. Hydra’s going to take care of you. I mean, you let me get away, but I’m sure they’ll understand. After all, historically Natzi’s have been known for their forgiveness...” You grinned, turning on your heel and coming face to face with him.

“Y/n, please. Baby, you gotta’ help me. I'm sorry. I’m so, so sorry.” Tommy begged. His meak words caused you to grit your teeth.

“I want you to remember this when they’re torturing you… I could have killed you. Easily- without regret. But you deserve so, so much worse.” You signed, slapping his face mockingly. You turned on your heel, as his words hit your back like a threat.

“You're a slut, you know that. No one will ever love you like I did. You'll always be a sad, broken, pathetic bitch. Lucky your family fucked off when they did before they could see you grow up to be such whore.”

You stopped dead in your tracks. Bucky watched you carefully as you gnawed on your bottom lip, pleading with your eyes. He met your silent question with a shrug of his shoulders. Swiftly you turned and before Tommy could understand what was happening you took a fistful of his polo shirt and instantaneously collided your fist with his cheek, knocking him out instantly.

“God damn, you're beautiful.” Bucky breathed, causing you to giggle.

“Lets get the fuck out of here.” You spat, watching Tommys limp body crumpled on the floor. It took everything in you not to finish the job right there. Luckily Bucky was there to pull you away.

You were quickly rushed through the hallways, avoiding the Hydra agents who writhed in half conscious pain on the floor. A nice touch by Wanda, who most likely sent them to their personal hell on earth. A few of them had bullet holes in their appendages but nothing fatel.

“Why aren't we killing them again?” You asked under your breath to Bucky.

“Steve thinks if a bunch of Hydra agents wind up dead ittl’ alert his friends back in New York. We’re trying to keep a low profile.” He explained, clenching his jaw. “Doesn't mean I’m not tempted to rain down fire on these sons of bitches. But he’s right.”

“But they know how to replicate my serum now. What do we-”

“We’ll keep close tabs on them. Right now we need to get you out of here. We’ll come back when we regroup.” He resaured you, pulling you close. “You're my mission. You've always been my mission. Can you just let me save you?” He chuckled.

You shook your head, a smile spreading on your lips. “I don't need a knight.”

Bucky flashed that lopsided grin you missed so much, “How bout’ a Sergeant?” He asked deeply, sending a chill to blossom through your body.

“I’ll get back to you.” You spoke sheepishly.

“Sam says the jets fired up. He and Vision are on the tarmac just out front.” Steve spoke, leaning you out the doors and into the burning sunlight. The four of you ran across the pathment as Steve helped Wanda into the aircraft. Wanda wrapped her hand around yours and pulled you up, but before you could climb in, the sound of gunfire exploded through the air.

In the time it took you to turn around, it was too late. Bucky had taken the blow of two bullets fired from the disheveled Hydra agent across the tarmac. Your heart stopped as another round of bullets sprayed through the air. Wanda screamed your name as you pulled away from her and threw yourself in front of Bucky, absorbing the impact. In a flash of red, you disintegrated the bullets, turning them to dust before you.

“Get him out of here.” You ordered, turning for a moment to assess his injuries. Steve and Sam reluctantly pulled Bucky onto the jet leaving you to face your demon. The agent smiled wickedly.

“Leaving so soon, Y/n. Family reunion not all you thought it was going to be?” He snearned.

“Family. Is that even a word you understand?” You spat, closing in on him. He was only a few yards away. The man shrugged and tucked his gun away.

“Maybe not. How about some words you'll understand?” He spoke coolly.

“Выхлоп.” Exhaust. The word echoed around your mind, a memory pulling at your heart.

“Отражение...тоска...забытый...горящий...призрак...пять...замороженный...мост… чувство вины.”

Reflection...Longing… Forgotten… Burning… Ghost… Five… Frozen… Bridge… Blame.

Images flashed through your mind. The inferno of your childhood home. Tommy’s lifeless body tipping over the bridge… Your mom and dad, the way they smiled. You're sisters giggle. Your mission… Finally, numbness washed over you as you hung your head in exhaustion.

You took two steps closer to the man, your heart pounding in your chest.

“Are you ready to comply?” He questioned curley.

“Yeah, that doesn’t work anymore.” You breathed, snapping your head up to meet the man's horrified face. Crimson flames erupted out of your hands as you lifted him off the ground. With the flick of your fingers, the bones in his legs snapped, an ungodly sound of crunching willing the air. He screamed in pain as you threw him like a ragdoll into the side of the building.

You shook your head, physically trying to rid yourself of the daze Hydras trigger words had sent you into. Bucky calling your name from behind knocking you back to reality. You ran towards the jet, climbing in and trying to steady your breathing.

“Are you okay?” Steve asked, astonished.

“I think so.” You replied, just as shocked as he was.

“Those were trigger words. Just like Bucky had. How did you fight it?” He spoke.

You looked to Bucky who only blinked at you. You had your answer before you even spoke.

“Bucky. I just remembered Bucky.” You breathed, squatting down beside him and holding your hand over his wounds to relieve his pain.

“I knew it.” He groaned, feeling the ache slowly dissipate into thin air.

“What?” You chuckled, taking a seat beside him and pressing your lips to his temple. He signed into your touch and leaned his head onto your shoulder.

“Knew you couldn't leave me for dead. You’ve got my six.” He explained, repeating his words from the other day. You smiled into your lap and rolled your eyes.

“Yeah, yeah. I thought it might be a dick move. But we’re even now.” You sighed, nudging him a little. His eyes fluttered closed as he began to doze off. His wounds surely repairing themselves while he slept. You wondered if he could hear how fast your heart was beating as you watched him nuzzle into you.

Of course, he did. He smiled softly, knowing he made you feel the same as you did him. Though he wondered if he was pushing his luck to imagine he could take that thought one step further.

.......................................................................................................................

A/N: So, #fuck tommy. Telling him off in this was honestly therapeutic lol. I really hoped you guys enjoyed this one. As always, please like and reblog of you’ve read it. And feel free so leave some feedback, its alwasy welcome!

@projectcampbell

@kalesrebellion

@calwitch

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whatcouldgowrong-ohthat · 5 years

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Safer (Natasha X Reader)

It’s from your point of view, but here’s another addition! There are glimpses of the others being fluffy and sweet, so the ones who appear a bit will be in the tags, but this is strictly a NatXReader fic. Gotta thank @songforhema for helping me out XD

Summary: Various Avenger x Reader one-shots with songs from musicals. In this one — A moment of weakness has left you in the hospital and everyone is scared, but no one quite like Natasha. Song is “Safer” from First Date.

Warnings: Frustration, tears, ANGST, bits of comfort, cussing as always. Seriously, if you don’t think Nat was bi, I don’t know what to tell you. TRIGGERS: Talks of attempted suicide, cutting, anxiety attack. Seriously, if you are experiencing any of this, please take the necessary actions to look out for yourself. If any of this could hurt you to read, please don’t.

Word Count: Almost 4.5k

Please don’t post my work anywhere without my permission.

Beep… Beep… Beep…

Beep… Beep…

“Hey, kid. We’d really like it if you’d wake up for us. The compound’s too quiet. It’s annoying actually. And you being here? Hell, it drives Nat crazy. It drives us all crazy, but…Just wake up for us, yeah? We all need you.”

You knew that voice. It was from Tony.

“The doctor says she’s probably in a bit of pain. Her mind’s still healing.” Rhodey. At least someone was securing that Tony wasn't going to fall into destructive habits.

But everything hurt. The idea of opening your eyes hurt.

Beep… Beep…

Beep…Beep… Beep…

“Y/N/N, it’s Sam. Hell, I’ll let you call me Sammy if you’d just open your eyes.” A sigh. From him? Was he frustrated? Angry at you? “None of us are angry, so calm your heart.” He chuckles and you’d give anything to smile. To twitch. Just something. “Damn, Y/N/N, you got us all worried. Nat’s been here the most. She just doesn’t say anything. I don’t think she knows what to say, but I figured you’d want to know.”

Beep… Beep… Beep…

Beep… Beep…

Beep…

“Hey, Miss Y/L/N, it’s Peter. I mean, duh, you probably know that from my voice. Dr. Banner said that’d be a thing. Um…we really miss you. And we all get it. No one’s mad. Really, we just want to see you wake up. You still gotta teach me how to do those latte leaf things for MJ. Remember, you promised that you’d teach me? 'M counting on it.”

“Actually, I don’t know if you remember me, Miss Y/N. Scott? Lang? Ant-man? I tagged along with Pete here. I heard what happened and we thought it’d be cool if we did a puzzle with you while we’re here. Sound good?”

Beep…

Beep… Beep…

Beep…Beep… Beep…

“Think you could open your eyes for us, Y/N? It’s just Buck and me, but I know everyone would rush on over here if you’d wake up. Then again, Nat would probably be pissed, huh? She’d want to be here for that and if she missed it because of a cup of coffee?

“Yeah, we’d never live that down.” You laughed, knowing Bucky was right. At least…you wanted to. Still, you couldn’t.

Beep… Beep…

“Alright, enough of this. We both know you’re fakin’ it, right? Come on, you know you could wake up at any second.” Silence. There weren’t footsteps…Were you alone? “I wish you came to one of us, Y/N. Hell, at least Nat or me. We got you into the Avengers. I thought — Well, I hoped we were closer than that. Shit! No, I didn’t mean to guilt you or anything. Fuck, your heart rate. Talk about a mood detector.” You could practically see him scratching the back of his neck. Freakin’ Clint. “I’ll make you a deal. You wake up when Tasha gets back from taking her pee break and I’ll start sharing coffee with you in the mornings. And none of that decaf crap that the others try to give us. Nah, we’ll have our little coffee cabinet all set up. I’ll even buy that peppermint tea you like. Deal? Just — Fuck, will you open your eyes?”

Beep…

It wasn’t a voice you heard next, disrupting the beep of the monitor, but instead a hand tracing the bandage on your arm. Natasha. You’d know the warm tingle from her touch anywhere. She was home for you, comforting and grounding yet exciting and nerve-racking all at the same time. She was supposed to be the scary one going on missions and coming back with enough injuries to give you a heart attack. It wasn’t supposed to be this way.

“I know that I have issues, Y/N. I face them, I swear. Think I overcome them then turn — they’re still there.” She sniffles and your heart clenches at the sound. Natasha doesn’t cry. At least, she doesn’t cry in front of people. Yet here the two of you are and all you want to do is open your eyes and hug her, tell her everything will be okay. “Wish that I was different.”

I don’t.

“I’d like to let go, but when I try to change there’s my past. And it’s always saying no.”

I get it, Nat. I do.

“Maybe it’s all ‘cause of your dad? His new kids? His new wife? Or why not just blame us…Hell, we’ve been nuts our whole lives.”

No, that’s not why! It’s not you! Any of you! Please, Nat…

She traces the edges of the bandage and the ache from the cuts is overwhelming. They were blaming themselves, but it wasn’t their fault. It was no one’s fault. You hit a low…had a moment, but it’s no one’s fault.

“When you’ve felt so alone since the moment of birth and you’ve struggled to find your own true sense of worth…” Hearing her talk about your own confessions makes your heart hurt. Her voice is shaking, cracking. Natasha isn’t one to wear her heart on her sleeve, to cry freely. She doesn’t like being raw, but she likes it with you. She likes being open with you. “When it seems there is no one across this whole earth to depend upon, you carry on. Just like you always do.” Her other hand takes yours, squeezing it gently. You try to squeeze hers, try to move a finger and just let her know that you’re here. “‘Cause it’s safer to rely on you. But Y/N, it’s not. If it were, you wouldn’t be here. You wouldn’t have hurt yourself. It’s — It’s okay to ask for help. We all need it from time to time. Look at Bucky or Tony or Bruce. Look at me. God, I wish you would look at me.”

Beep… Beep… Beep…

Everyone watched from outside the room, lined up against the wall. It was late, but no one was thinking about the time. All their eyes were fixated on the girl lying in the hospital bed. Nat was curled into the uncomfortable chair, hand still holding Y/N’s. Clint was just inside, leaning against the window. They were Y/N’s family and eventually the Avengers weaseled their way into her heart. Each of them felt guilty for not seeing the signs. They felt like they should have, all of them have been on the receiving end of anxiety attacks and night terrors for years.

“I still don’t know how it happened.”

Sam looked at Tony upon hearing his voice, shifting his gaze to everyone at that moment. Rhodey hadn’t left the man’s side since this happened. The man had a bad habit of laying on the guilt real thick due to his never-ending feeling of responsibility. It was clear from his dark circles and sunken eyes that things were still the same as him. Rhodey would be good at keeping an eye on him.

Meanwhile, Bucky was practically guarding the hospital bed with a gaze that never wavered. His arms were crossed, metal over the skin so that no one thought to even try and hurt the patient on the bed. It seemed the brother-sister relationship was still going strong. Just behind him was Steve, hand resting on his old pal’s shoulder in an attempt to keep him relatively calm. Making nurses and doctors nervous wouldn’t help anything, would it? But Buck swore it was for intimidation purposes, anything could help.

A little further down, in the waiting room on this floor, Sam could make out where Peter and Scott were picking out which comics to read to Y/N when it was their turn to visit in the almost neverending cycle. They seemed to be developing a strong relationship. Later, he did not doubt that Hope, Wanda, Vision, T’Challa, and Shuri would be trading shifts with them. The only two that never left were currently at Y/N’s side.

“Seen a million movies, all selling true love,” Tony muttered, leaning back and crossing his arms. His gaze was fixated on how Natasha touched Y/N as if she was the most fragile thing in the world.

Rhodey raised an eyebrow. “Yeah?”

“Fantasies Nat’s not sure she’s worthy of,” Steve elaborated, understanding where Tony was going with that comment.

“Well, caution to the wind,” Sam said, glancing at the woman.

Bucky nodded, actually agreeing with him. “Her heart’s been on display. Still, the end result…”

“It’s not gone her way,” Steve finished, hoping Natasha wasn’t completely upset with them talking about this.

“We can hear you.” Clint’s voice shut them all up and Natasha sent him an appreciative smile. He knew this wasn’t easy for her.

Scrunching her nose, she blinked away a fresh set of tears as she eyed the newest bandages. The last ones she had seen still had blood-soaked through them. Seeing Y/N in that state left her trembling, sobbing because she didn’t know what to do or how it happened. Y/N always seemed to be the bright, shining face with the bubbly laugh, smile, and corny joke that they all needed to hear. Stroking the back of her hand with her thumb, Natasha took a slow breath. Bruce said it’d be best to keep talking to Y/N. “Hearing familiar voices would help with the healing process.” At least that’s what he had said a week ago, and maybe there was a small part of her mind that for once doubted Dr. Banner.

Shifting in her seat, she tucked her knee under her chin. Talk. Just talk. “So when I would date some guy and they were a deadbeat or jerk, I wasn’t so crushed when it all didn’t work. I guess it’s because I always knew you were there. Friend or more, you were always there, Y/N. I need you here. Please?”

Beep… Beep…

Beep…

That infuriating beeping seemed louder today. It took a second for everything to piece together the memories, everything you heard. However, it wasn’t the biggest priority when you opened your eyes. Not that it wasn’t a priority, but…you opened your eyes. Blinking slowly, warily, you shifted in the uncomfortable hospital bed and the sound of your heartbeat picking up on the monitor woke the person asleep at the foot of your bed.

Sam shifted, shaking his head to hopefully wake himself up a bit more. Until he saw what had woken him. Immediately he sat up, grinning from ear to ear. “You’re awake! Y/N/N, you had us worried sick, I swear to —“ You opened your mouth to talk, but it came out rough and painful. Immediately you grimaced, rubbing your throat and he understood. “Need some water?” You nodded and he stood to go to the pitcher of water and the empty glass that was near the front door.

Once offered, you accepted it eagerly and slowly drank the cool contents. “Where is everyone?”

“Well, Clint and Nat were forced to go to the cafeteria to get some food. The others left a little over an hour ago. They said something about bringing some stuff from your room so that it might feel a bit more like home when you woke up.” Grinning, he laughed as he said, “Of course, then you had to go and mess with their plan.”

You cringed. “Sorry,” you said, voice still rough like sandpaper. “I didn’t —“

“Don’t apologize, Y/N.” He frowned and took a seat in the chair. “Seriously, everyone is going to be thrilled to see you happy. You had the actual King of Wakanda come visit you, you know that?”

“Shuri probably made him,” you joked, offering a weak smile. It wasn’t as bright. It didn’t reach your eyes.

Glancing at the door, Sam knew he didn’t have much time. Not if Natasha was going to get a moment alone with you before everyone else returned. He shifted out of the chair and onto the edge of the bed, clear concern etched in his features. “Do you want to tell me what happened?”

Immediately you looked away, searching to find somewhere to stare that wasn’t Sam Wilson. You knew you had to talk about it and Sam probably was the best bet considering his experience helping with the VA. Still…Talking about it never seemed fair to everyone else. They all seemed to have it so much worse and your problems seemed so little.

“Come on, Y/N, we don’t want you back here. You have to talk to someone.”

Meeting his gaze, you noticed the unshed tears in his eyes and realized just how much you’d scared everyone. Even Sam. With that in mind, you spoke. You told him everything from seeing your abusive ex at the store, a man you had dated for five years before meeting the Avengers, and how that had triggered an anxiety attack in your car. How that led to the cutting back at the compound and, with everyone away on a mission, you just wanted to feel something. You told him about the boiling shower and filling the tub and how you passed out in the water with the gashes on your arms bleeding freely. You told him everything and, though you didn’t quite understand it, it felt as if a weight was lifted off your chest.

“Then I heard Tony’s voice. And everyone’s every time you guys visited.” He noticed how you shifted your gaze to your lap, tears threatening to fall. A few succeeded in their attempts, trickling past her waterline and slipping down her cheeks as Sam reached forward and squeezed your shin. “I’m sorry, Sam.”

“You’re awake.” The new voice caused you to look up, Sam following your lead. Standing in the doorway was none other than Natasha. Her natural abilities as a spy left her able to open the door without so much as a sound and now, standing there, it was clear she was taking note of everything and maybe had even been there for longer. Looking to Sam, her fist clenched at her side. “What did you do?”

“Nothing!” He held his hands up, eyes wide because no one liked being on the receiving end of the infamous Black Widow’s wrath. Especially not when it came to the one thing she was the most protective of. You. “Y/N/N, help me out here?”

“Tash, he didn’t do anything,” you promised, earning her steely gaze. After having been asleep for a while, it was unsettling to see that gaze piercing straight through you once again. “I’m okay.”

She watched you, carefully, studying to make sure that what you said was, in fact, true. Still, there was a look in her eyes that made you want nothing more than to hug her. Clearing her throat, she shifted slightly and reached for the door, finally explaining, “I’m going to go get Bruce. He’ll want to make sure you’re holding up okay.”

“Tash —“

“I’ll be back later.”

The promise sounded empty, but you knew better than to argue. Instead, she slipped out, passing Clint on the way.

“She’ll be back,” Sam assured as if reading your thoughts. The truth was, she might. She might not. You remembered everything she admitted and never, not once while you were awake, was she that open. She might regret opening up to you in such a way, maybe it was spies intellect?

All you wanted to do was curl up in a ball, go back to sleep and maybe not wake up this time around. However, you didn’t get the chance to act on those thoughts. You couldn’t even dwell as Clint started his conversation with you. He and Sam were a little protective over Natasha and you. While it took some time to get used to, moments like this made you feel guilty, unsure that you deserved such friends.

“I — Can I — I just…” Whatever you wanted to say, you couldn’t form the sentence. Everything was overwhelming. Your head felt clammy, eyes heavy, ears pounding. Biting your lip, you looked at the two men, wanting them to understand.

They did. They said their goodbyes, saying they’d be waiting in the cafeteria to hear what Bruce said after he checked on you. For now, once the door closed yet again, you had a moment to yourself save the days, maybe even weeks that you spent secluded in your mind listening to the echoes of everyone around you. Tears threatened to fall as you took a shaky breath. It felt like an anchor was sitting on your chest, tugging and pulling down, down until you felt like you were drowning.

Curling up on the bed, you rolled onto your side, careful with the needles protruding from your skin. The last thing you needed was to lose more blood. Staring at the IV, watching the bag of liquid dangling less than a foot away, you didn’t know what to do. You didn’t know if there was anything to say. Instead, your mind drifted to why you were here.

Seeing your ex.

“When you once, unafraid, wore your heart on your sleeve,” you murmured, voice quivering as tears slipped down your cheek. “And the ones that you loved chose to just turn and leave…” Your fingers twisted the corner of your pillow, pulling at a loose piece of string and forcing it to unravel. “Every day it gets harder to somehow believe you will survive.” Sniffling, your bleary vision made you only want to cry harder. “So you strive to keep up your guard ‘cause it’s safer..to hold every card.”

What you weren’t aware of was the spy sitting just outside. Her back was pressed against the wall, ear tilted towards the door. No one could tell her to move. No one had the guts. Instead, everyone watched her from down the hall, taking turns to make sure she wouldn’t say or do anything she would regret. Natasha, though good at putting up an act, wasn’t so good at maintaining that during these sorts of moments. She was frightened, terrified of losing you if she left again. It was why she sent Rhodey to get Bruce. Blinking away tears, she stared at the wall opposite of where she sat and whispered, “It’s safer to hold every card.” She couldn’t bring herself to move, listening to everything you dared to say.

“I feel out of control.”

A weak smile ghosted her lips. “I feel safe on the ground.”

“I go building up walls.”

“Yet you wish to be found.” She didn’t understand it. You were with the Avengers, surrounded by people who understood what it was like to be in pain, to be haunted by your past. Even knowing that you refused to let anyone know about the burdens you carried. Only now did they see that your life hadn’t been nearly as perfect as they had all assumed. Looking at the man sitting next to her, Natasha allowed Clint to take her hand and offer a reassuring squeeze. “She’s a true contradiction to which I am bound.”

He smiled, kissing her forehead as he traced the back of her hand with his thumb. They would be okay. It would take time, but they would be okay. The two were safer with each other and everyone knew that. Even Y/N.

A few hours passed and still, Natasha couldn’t bring herself to visit you. By now Bruce had come and gone, saying he’d release you in a couple of days. With that in mind, everyone did their best to stay happy when in your presence. Peter and Scott had brought in the puzzle they’d been working on, having it encased in a box so that it never had to be taken apart. It was some cheesy version of the Avengers looking like cartoons and the sight made you laugh. T’Challa and Shuri came in, T’Challa filled with wisdom and kind words and Shrui voicing her own jokes and opinions. Happy brought you fries and a chocolate milkshake, knowing you hated the food here. Both of you sat and talked and it felt easy, almost normal. He couldn’t stay long, having to take Peter to see Aunt May. Tony was next, with Rhodey by his side, and he was showing me photos of Harley winning his most recent competition. Both of you had always gone and supported him, but you being in the hospital forced you to miss it. There was one photo that brought a teary-eyed smile to your lips. Tony and Harley were standing on the edges and in the center were a dotted outline that was plugged in with one of that editing software. Written in the outline was, “Y/F/N Y/L/N” The boys were pointing at the empty space and grinning as if it were the most genius idea they had come up with. It made your heartache, wishing you could have supported him. Before too long the kid would be going off to college.

Steve and Bucky came in an hour later. A part of you had been scared, not wanting a lecture from Steve about how you could have said that you had stuff you were working through, triggers they needed to avoid when around you. It seemed he was holding himself back and you knew that a certain soldier had gotten him to shut up. Bucky, someone who rarely ever talked yet always looked out for you, presented you with a gift. It was a small journal similar to the ones he constantly wrote in. A little note was inside, scribbled in his handwriting. It’ll take time, but if a 101-year-old man can do it, I know you can. You giggled and hugged his side before he walked you through a breathing exercise that would hopefully aid in your next panic attack. It was something he’d learned in therapy and assured you that it worked.

“Thanks, you guys.”

“We’re here if you need us, Y/N.” You nodded, knowing Steve was right. It still sucked, either way, feeling like they were all watching you like hawks now. It’s just a concern.

After they left, it was another hour before Natasha finally made her appearance. It was probably why Clint and Sam hadn’t stopped by yet. They’d been coercing her into visiting. Finally meeting her gaze, you felt frozen in place. She was leaning against the door, arms crossed as if to form her sort of shield. She couldn’t exactly borrow Steve’s in moments like this, could she?

“H-Hey,” you try, your voice sounding weak. Clearing your throat, you shifted in your spot and asked, “How are you?”

“I think I’m supposed to be asking you that.”

The air seemed calmer as she stepped inside. She was keeping her distance and, while part of you wanted to ask why you weren’t entirely sure you wanted to know the reason considering the options. Tugging your bottom lip between your teeth, you knew you had to talk to her. Natasha was always one to hold secrets and she never liked prying to know yours. That was something she wanted you to trust her with. She wanted you to confide in her on your own time. “Tash, can we…can we talk?”

She took a seat on the chair next to the hospital bed, leaning forward and showing you had her full attention. Strands of hair fell out of her braid, falling in front of her eyes and a part of you wanted to move them out of the way. Your hand ached for that familiarity but now wasn’t the time. “You had us all scared for a bit.”

“I know.”

There was silence. Both of you weren’t sure what to say, but it seemed Natasha was still good with her thoughts and words. “Why didn’t you tell us sooner?”

“That I was struggling?” She nodded. Taking a slow breath, you stared intently at the sheets you were wrapped up in. Picking at them, you tried to find the right way to explain all this. Everyone seemed to be functioning, or at least trying to, so how could you be the one person who wasn’t? Especially when you knew that your trauma wasn’t as bad as theirs? “I…I look at the people who’ve worked it all out and I wonder why I just want out. Sometimes I wanna just stand up and shout, ‘Just commit and deal with it!’” Looking at her, you tucked your hair behind your ears and let tears freely slip down your cheeks. “Before my life flies by…I can’t let my life fly by…”

Natasha moved, wanting nothing more than to be closer to you. She took a seat on the edge of the bed and pulled you into her arms, holding you tightly as you broke down in tears. “Y/N…Sweetie…” She traced your back, fingers dancing lightly as you finally let it all out. You had explained to Sam the details, but the way you had spoken, it all felt so technical. You had come to develop a knack for speaking about your history as if it were someone else’s, but here? Now? Natasha had a way of slipping through the cracks in your walls, getting past that guard and understanding you. She murmured sweet nothings in Russian, letting her comforting voice wash over you. When it seemed you had calmed down enough, she brushed your hair out of your eyes, her fingers lingering. Her voice was calm as she asked, “But is it safer?”

Sniffling, you shrugged again, looking away from her. “Maybe, yeah, maybe it’s safer.”

She shook her head, tilting your face to look at her. It seemed her gaze searched your own before she rests her forehead against yours. Your noses brushed together as she delicately brushed your tears away with her thumbs. “Y/N, please, let us in…Try to let us help?”

You noticed the look in her eyes. Dark circles had crept underneath, making her look less like that badass spy and assassin you had crushed on and more-so like the Natasha that you had fallen for. She looked heartbroken, crushed, and afraid. All you wanted was to be okay, to be with her and know that everything was going to be okay. With that in mind, you allowed yourself the smallest nod, not trusting your voice. That is until you saw the hope glimmer in her eyes. That was all you wanted — for Natasha to be hopeful and happy. So with a small sniffle, you tried to give her your best smile and assured her, “I’ll try.”

Natasha relaxed, releasing a breath neither of you realized she had been holding. A single tear slipped down her cheek and you moved to brush it away. You didn’t want there to be any more tears. Instead, she leaned forward and pulled you into a small kiss. Waves of courage and reassurance wrapping around you two as you realized that this was something that needed to be done with help. It was safer that way, but not only that — it was better.

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lovemesomerafael · 4 years

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Others Like Me Chapter 14: The Tower

Chapters 1 - 10 Chapter 11 Chapter 12 Chapter 13

Read It On AO3

“For what it’s worth, he’s genetically identical to our Barnes,” Bruce says. “He doesn’t scar any more than ours does, but there is evidence on the scans that he’s had some of the same injuries as our Barnes. And there’s also evidence that he’s been through something like what he describes with this Hydra.”

“Like what?” Clint asks.

“I haven’t spent much time on the arm itself, that’s Stark, but the way it’s attached? It’s a nightmare. That thing’s gotta hurt every minute. It looks like it’s been worked on, and it’s nice work. But there are some ways he’s healed that are just the best his body could do. It’s clear that it was originally attached very differently, crudely, with a lot of attention to making sure he could feel with the arm and hand, but almost no attention to the way the arm itself would feel to him.”

“Shit,” Natasha hisses.

They’re sitting around the large, oval table in the conference room, with the scans Bruce is describing hovering above the center. Tony has called this meeting to decide what the hell they’re supposed to do with Bucky. Marya is purposely not in the room, although she’s made it abundantly clear that she’s furious about that. Tony ended up having to make her nonattendance a direct order and require her to agree, in the presence of Jarvis, that she would not listen in. Now that they’d discovered her back door to the camera feed from the brig, it was the only way to ensure that she couldn’t sweet-talk or hack Jarvis into helping her again.

“It gets worse,” Bruce continues. “We all know the kinds of injuries Barnes has had. Lotta breaks, lotta organ damage, right?”

“I feel like I get stabbed more than is really fair, too,” Barnes muses.

“Well this guy, his scans make yours look pristine. Even with super healing, his body shows the marks of a hell of a life.”

“What are you saying, Banner?” Tony asks, scowling.

“I’m saying that his scans are telling the same story his mouth is. Everything physical we’ve looked at is consistent. Down to the permanent thickening of his skull where he says that ‘emptying’ machine attached. It looks just like Marya’s, only worse. Much worse.”

“I don’t think Marya needs to know that,” Natasha notes. Sam huffs disgustedly, but stays mute.

Tony lifts his chin from the hand it’s been resting on, two fingers splayed across his cheek in his characteristic ‘listening to things he doesn’t want to hear’ pose. “Anything else?”

“That’s about it.”

“Well, the arm’s interesting,” Tony says. “It’s Stark tech, for the most part, but the materials and some of the features are pure Wakanda. Shuri confirmed it. T’Challa is outraged; he wants to disembowel whoever stole Wakandan secrets.”

Natasha sighs. “T’Challa’s so hot when he talks about disembowelment.”

“You didn’t tell him about Bucky, did you?” Sam asks.

Tony answers with a glare so disdainful only Tony Stark could achieve it.

Clint is squatting on his seat, as he always does, no matter how often Sam tries to explain to him how chairs work. “What about the switch?”

All eyes turn back to Tony, who doesn’t answer for a moment. Instead, he picks up the switch from the table in front of him and looks at it thoughtfully. He’s clearly troubled.

“Tony?” Natasha prods.

“It’s a little different from Marya’s. The design, the way it works, is the same. It’s got a couple of upgrades I approve of. But it’s a little crude. Not as well-made as hers.”

Sam waves a hand toward the switch. “Which is entirely consistent with Bucky having made it himself, using Stark’s design. Just like he said. Look, I’m ready to vote. I believe the guy.”

“Just, slow your roll a minute,” Tony instructs him. “Nat? You’re the human lie detector, what do you think?”

“I got nothin’, Stark. He’s consistent, he’s got no tells… I have absolutely nothing that says he’s lying.”

“But…?” Clint rolls his eyes.

“But this Hydra he says trained him. They sound a lot like the Red Room. I’m consistent and I don’t have any tells, either.”

“Which I keep telling her, is completely circular. She can’t base not believing his story on the story itself. Either you believe it or you don’t.”

“Not true. Legends are much more effective when there’s as much truth to them as possible. This guy was trained by somebody. He’s gotta know we’d spot that. So he builds it into his legend and explains it away.”

Clint makes a disgusted sound.

“Guess we know where you stand, huh, Clint?” Sam asks hopefully.

“I don’t know. What I know is that we’re fucked here. There’s no way to prove or disprove his story, because according to Stark and Banner’s multiverse Theory, there’s a universe where this guy has all the same physical attributes, even though he’s not the Barnes from Marya’s universe. In which case-“

“He comes from right here,” Tony snaps, cutting Clint off. “He’s a spy. Somebody’s trying to infiltrate the Avengers Initiative, and they know about Marya, so they built themselves a Barnes to get to us through her.”

“He’s a genetic duplicate, Tony,” Bruce argues. “Nobody has cloning technology that can-“

Tony scoffs. “Oh, so you’re Team Bucky now?”

“I’m Team Science.”

It goes on like that for quite a while, as lines begin to be drawn between those who believe Bucky is who he says he is – Sam and Bruce – and those who don’t – Natasha and Tony. Clint wavers back and forth. When Tony mentions that, it suddenly becomes clear to everyone that Barnes has said almost nothing throughout the meeting.

“Hey, Cap, you wanna-“

“Told you not to call me that,” Barnes snarls, low and menacing.

“Sorry,” Tony says quickly. “You wanna weigh in here? You got kind of a unique perspective, I’d say.”

“Maybe,” Barnes says quietly. “But I got nothin’ to say right now. I’m listenin’ to all of you, I’m weighin’ the evidence. I’m not ready to vote.”

“This can’t go on forever, Barnes,” Natasha tells him. “He’s a prisoner.”

“Ain’t like we got him in a gulag, Nat. And he said himself he’s willing to be patient.” Barnes looks up at the faces around the table. “We gotta get this right. Because I think we all know that if we decide he’s a threat, we can’t just let him go with a stern warning.”

That silences everyone for a few moments. Some of them exchange troubled glances, others avoid eye contact. Because they all know what Barnes is saying. If Bucky’s a threat, he can’t be allowed to leave the Tower. Not with all that he knows. And their choices narrow down to two very unpleasant options.

Barnes gets up from the table.

“Where are you going?” Tony asks, annoyed.

“I hate meetings. You know that. I’m going to the gym. Think I’ll see if Bucky wants to spar.” Something in his voice, and the look he gives Tony as he says it, is vaguely threatening. Whatever he has in mind, it’s not a simple workout.

“Now, this I gotta see,” Sam smiles.

“No,” Barnes says sharply. “You don’t. Everybody stays the fuck out of the gym until I say different. And Jarvis?”

“Yes, Captain.”

“You broadcast anything from in there and I promise you, I will do shit to your hard drive that’ll make you develop emotions just so you can cry. You feel me?”

“Understood, Captain.”

*****

In the gym, Bucky is standing in front of Barnes, leaning on a rack of hand weights, watching Barnes tape his hands. He’s explained that he tapes his hands because he hates breaking his fingers, which used to happen all the time with Steve. Barnes expects it’ll be the same with Bucky, because Barnes wants a full-on match. Bucky hates broken fingers, too, but it never occurred to him to tape his hands. He considers trying it, but in the end, he doesn’t bother. He’s got other things on his mind.

They’re both uncomfortable, but for very different reasons.

Barnes isn’t at all sure it’s smart to invite a prisoner, a potential spy and a man he knows is dangerous as all hell, to beat the crap out of him if he can. He’s not even sure what he hopes to accomplish. He wonders if this isn’t the biggest mistake he’s made yet as Captain America, and wishes for about the two millionth time today that Steve was here. Steve would advise asking Tony to suit up and stand guard. Barnes is disgusted about twenty-seven ways by the fact that, if Steve were here, he would take that advice and mock Steve the whole time for being a grandma. Because it would be good advice. Barnes is in a world of hurt if Bucky goes off and he has no backup. But he can’t make himself ask Tony to do it. Shit, how much of his badass reputation is built on nothing more than bitching that he didn’t need Steve to protect him, while Steve took the heat and protected him anyway?

Bucky, for his part, is struggling to hide his internal chaos. His fight-or-flight response is so powerful right now, it’s almost painful. He can’t shake the persistent warning sparking through his entire body, screaming that this is a trap. If Barnes was Hydra, it would have been. Bucky knows full well what happens when you raise a hand to your captors. It’s all well and good to crush a minion or two on occasion; Hydra had plenty of those. Hydra brass actually thought it was kind of cute when the Asset did that. But Barnes has authority here. He is not a minion. And if Bucky takes the bait and he’s wrong… He stands glowering at the floor, deep lines etched in his face as he endures a waking nightmare as real as it was when it really happened.

“Hey!” Barnes calls, sharp and loud.

Bucky’s head jerks up and he damn near responds in Russian.

“The fuck did you go?” Barnes asks, genuinely concerned.

But Bucky’s not about to acknowledge the flashback. “I, uh… Nowhere. Tryin’ to figure out what to call you, is all. I ain’t callin’ you Jim.”

“Says the asshole who calls himself Bucky.”

Barnes’ grin is actually a little reassuring. It probably shouldn’t be – God knows Bucky could invent some unspeakable tortures if he had a mind to, which means this guy is just as twisted - but it is.

“Stick with Barnes. It’s what everyone uses, anyway.”

“Fuck you. That’s my name.”

“Listen, you got clear title to Bucky, pal. I ain’t goin’ near that.” He stands up and motions for Bucky to follow him to the middle of the huge mat covering much of the floor of the gym.

“So, this sparring, there any rules?” Bucky asks, trying like hell to seem nonchalant.

“No killing. No destroying the gym, unless you wanna listen to Stark whine. That’s about it.”

Bucky is absolutely not reassured by that, but he doesn’t get the opportunity to spool up any tighter about it, because the next thing he knows, he’s on his ass on the mat. Barnes has swept his legs out from under him and is just beginning to reach for Bucky’s throat when Bucky’s instincts take over.

Bucky expected Barnes to reach for his throat. So before he has a chance to get hold of him, Bucky flips to his feet and takes advantage of Barnes’ position to land a left uppercut that sends Barnes flying at least ten feet backward. Bucky rushes him, which Barnes somehow also expects. Stunned but spinning quickly to avoid him, Barnes gets behind Bucky and uses his momentum to throw Bucky headlong into the padded wall several feet away. In two moves, they’ve covered over thirty feet. Suddenly, the gym seems kind of small.

Bucky springs away from the wall, circling to get himself some room. Barnes circles, too, and the two grin at each other from identical defensive crouches.

“No killing, don’t bust up the gym. Those really the only two rules?” Bucky asks.

“Why, you want to add some? Make sure I don’t shame you too bad?”

“Nope,” Bucky says, grinning evilly. “Just checkin’.” He crosses the distance between them in a blur of speed and grasps Barnes, ready to yeet him into the wall across the room. But Barnes sees it coming and, instead, Bucky’s suddenly on his back with Barnes on top of him, scrambling to get control of his arms. Before he can, Bucky gets a foot under his gut and heaves Barnes six feet in the air and double that backwards. Barnes crashes into the opposite wall, and both of them spring back into their defensive stances.

The next few minutes are a dizzying kaleidoscope of punches and kicks, interspersed with balletic leaps and a steadily increasing level of trash talk. Barnes can already tell that Bucky is the best opponent he’s ever fought. And Bucky now understands that Barnes’s offer to spar had been legitimate. Neither one of them knows when they start laughing, but it’s early in the fight.

There’s a lot of punching, but less than you might think, because they’re just too good at predicting each other’s moves. Kicking’s like that, too, but at least there, they each know a few moves the other doesn’t. Both of them get some good body throws in, especially when the other tries to attack, because that, too, is predictable. The intended victim, anticipating it, can use the motion against the attacker. That quickly becomes a little frustrating. They have essentially the same moves. They have the same instincts. They see each other’s next strike coming too easily. Which is why training and technique give way, and their sparring match devolves into a street brawl.

At some point, Barnes runs Bucky into the rack of hand weights, which goes over in a very loud, very heavy crash. Something’s wrong with Bucky’s left arm after that. It’s also Barnes who throws Bucky into a wall high enough that, as he scrabbles for purchase while he’s falling, Bucky pulls the padding down with him. The custom wooden racks that hold balance balls, yoga mats, foam rolls, jump ropes, and other equipment collapse when Bucky sends Barnes flying into them, face first. That’s also how Barnes’ nose gets broken.

It’s Bucky who picks up the treadmill to use as a shield but, in his defense, Barnes was the one who threw a fifty-pound hand weight at him, and it would’ve hurt if it had hit him. They know that because it totally destroys the treadmill. They’re both responsible for the destruction of the weight bench, which was not meant for two supersoldiers to land on it simultaneously at full force, arms locked around each other’s necks. But they never do agree whose fault it is that Barnes’s metal arm goes through one of the floor-to-ceiling windows, shattering it.

So yeah, they only keep the no-killing rule. By the time Barnes gives Jarvis the all-clear to unlock the doors, Tony’s gym is in ruins. Neither of the combatants had expected every single member of the team to come pouring into the room as soon as the locks released, but that’s only because they didn’t realize that the resounding thuds and crashes of their antics could be felt four floors in either direction.

The team slows, then creeps toward them, gaping at the carnage and peering amongst the debris to determine whether either of them has survived. There’s blood in several places on the fourteen-foot high ceiling, and some of it is in the shape of bodies. There’s wind whistling through the hole in the window, and it’s swaying the few light fixtures that survived, most of which are broken, including the one with a bloody jump rope wrapped around it. The wall padding and the mat on the floor are torn beyond repair, which is fine because those bloodstains aren’t coming out, anyway. The stuffing from inside the mats is everywhere. Tony whimpers as he takes in the devastation.

Bucky’s laid out across the wreck of a machine the whole team uses to do exercises against hydraulic resistance, and Barnes is under what’s left of a rowing machine, somehow tangled up in the plastic scraps of what used to be an exercise ball. They’re both bloody and bruised, each with a few broken bones that they know about. Later, when Bruce insists on full body scans, they’ll discover Barnes also has a cracked femur. They’re sweaty and exhausted, and their identical smiles are gleeful, if bloody, as they gasp for breath.

“This is why we can’t have nice things,” Tony moans.

Both Barnes and Bucky cackle maniacally, before Bucky coughs wetly and groans.

“Bucky,” Bruce says tentatively, like he’s talking to a spooked animal. “That red under you, is that blood, or another burst exercise ball?”

Bucky groans again, before answering thickly, “Prob’ly blood. Don’t tell Barnes, but I got one of these bars through my chest.”

Bruce and Marya rush to him while Barnes begins laughing hysterically. “You got stabbed by that thing? What a pussy!”

“Yeah, you might wanna reserve judgment, there, Captain Oblivious,” Clint drawls, indicating Barnes’s leg.

Barnes looks down to see that one of the oarlocks of the rowing machine has been broken from its mounting and is embedded in the meat of his left thigh. “Dammit!” He shrieks.

Now it’s Bucky laughing hysterically.

Bruce, perhaps a little affected by the depth of Tony’s enraged despair at the state of his gym, is uncharacteristically autocratic about medical care for both Barnes and Bucky. He gives them no options, but orders the rest of the team to help him strap them both to gurneys and haul them to the medical floor.

Over time, Marya’s learned to live with her terror of anything medical, developed as a result of her time as Hydra’s expendable soldier, slave, and experimental subject. One of the ways Bruce has helped her do that is to teach her to assist him. She’s gotten to the point where she doesn’t mind providing medical care, although she still dreads and resists receiving it. When they reach the large trauma room on the medical floor, Bruce begins to bark instructions to her.

Barnes tries to object. “Not happening, Banner. Get Sam to help you. I don’t want Marya in here with him.”

Seeing Marya look to Bruce, Barnes cries, “Don’t look at him. You don’t answer to him, you answer to me.”

“Not in here, she doesn’t,” Bruce says mildly. “Marya, get an IV started, too.”

Barnes argues and threatens for a while, as Bruce and Marya ignore him. Bruce conducts scans while Marya assesses wounds and administers first aid.

“This is insubordination,” Barnes mutters grumpily as she cuts off his shorts to get to the large wound the broken oarlock has made in his thigh.

“I know, Captain,” she coos sympathetically. “You’ll feel better once the morphine starts to work.”

Bucky watches her hungrily. He’s in significant pain, but he’s long ago learned how to ignore that. He waits impatiently while she cleans and bandages Barnes’s leg, wanting her to come back and stand next to him, to touch him again. He’s drowsy from the pain medication Bruce has given him, and unaware of the goofy, dreamy smile on his face as he follows Marya with his eyes.

Barnes sees it, though, and scowls. He only relaxes when Bucky’s eyes drift closed as the morphine takes a hold of him.

“I don’t know if you are my Sergeant, but you are definitely James Barnes,” Marya scolds Bucky as she cuts his shirt from his body, jolting him back to consciousness.

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Barnes asks from the other exam table.

“Nothing complimentary,” Marya mutters.

Bucky grins at her. “It’s worth it, getting my ass kicked, to get to see you.”

“So you admit I kicked your ass!” Barnes shouts.

“Shut up and quit moving,” Bruce rebukes him. “You’re blurring my scans.”

Marya’s hands are firm and sure as she begins to clean and examine the stab wound in Bucky’s chest. He likes the practiced way she goes about her work, and the adorable wrinkles between her eyebrows as she concentrates.

“I need something to call you,” she says, glancing up from her work to look into his eyes. “I will not call you Sergeant, so I suppose I’ll have to call you Bucky.”

“But you said-“

“I said that I could not call the Zimniy Soldat Bucky. But I don’t know that you are the Zimniy Soldat.”

“That makes a weird kind of sense.”

“One of us should have some. The two of you clearly don’t.”

Bucky’s grin widens and he feels a bloom of warmth in his chest that has nothing to do with the hole in his flesh and everything to do with the fondly exasperated look she’s giving him.

“This chest wound is going to take a few layers of stitching,” Marya tells Bruce over her shoulder. “I’ll get everything ready for you.”

“Don’t knock me out, though,” Bucky pleads. “If this is the only time they’ll let me see you, I want to be awake.”

“Knock him the hell out,” Barnes growls.

Unfortunately for Bucky, Bruce insists on sedating him as he repairs the stab wound. Although Bucky will heal even without it, this universe’s Bruce is just as stubborn about proper medical care as the one from Bucky’s universe. Which means his time with Marya is cut disappointingly short.

*****

Bruce requires both Barnes and Bucky to remain on the medical floor overnight. Once their injuries are treated and they’re stable, Bruce puts them both in one large room. Since there are six private rooms on the floor, everyone is perfectly aware that making them share is punishment for their reckless stupidity in injuring each other and destroying the gym. Both Barneses realize, too late, that they should have hidden the fact that it had been so much fun.

Tony backs Barnes in requiring that Marya leave the medical floor now that the regular medical staff have arrived. Bucky’s disappointed, but not surprised.

As evening falls, there’s really nothing to do while they heal except talk. The longer the groggy, intermittent conversation goes, the clearer it is to Bucky that something’s changed between them. Barnes is willing to be much more open with him than any of them have been thus far. He would attribute some of that to morphine, except that he knows how good he, himself, is at keeping his mouth shut, even when under the influence of something.

“It’s not getting better. We’re basically putting out fires,” Barnes was saying. “They call themselves the Ten Rings. Run by some shithead calls himself The Mandarin. Slippery fucker. Absolutely ruthless. Nat almost caught up with him once, but he ghosted. Haven’t gotten close since.”

“That sucks.”

Barnes’s face went hard. “Doesn’t matter. Because if it’s the last thing I do, I gotta take them down. Especially that Mandarin motherfucker.” Barnes hisses, “He’s the one who killed Steve.”

Bucky can see that Barnes’s rage is never far below the surface. “What, exactly, happened?”

“Ask someone else, man,” Barnes sighs. “I don’t wanna talk about that.”

“Yeah. I get it.”

There’s a lull then, the air thick with memories as cherished as they are excruciating. After a while, Barnes practically whispers, “We were married, anyone tell you that?”

“Fuck! No.”

“Yeah. Dumbass finally says yes, then he gets himself killed.”

“Shit, I’m sorry.”

“Yeah.”

They go quiet again, the ghost of Steve Rogers palpable between them as they both remember, and ache. It’s a therapeutic, in a way, just sitting here, grieving together the man they’ve both loved since they knew what love was. The man they both still love with a savage, tormented violence. Different though the circumstances were, they can each still fully understand the other’s grief at losing him. They’re not talkers. They don’t want, need, or even know how to speak their sorrow. But as they lie there, lost for the moment in pain, they somehow realize that in this bizarre situation, there’s also absolutely no need. To tell each other how they feel would be redundant.

An hour goes by in total silence. Barnes is the first to break it, and it’s clear his thoughts have returned to the Ten Rings threat. “Thing is, without Steve, we got even less chance than we had before, and we were already fucked. They get bolder every damn time.”

Bucky catches the thread immediately. “Yeah, I noticed there are a lot of terrorist attacks here. Lot more than in my universe.”

“Yeah?”

“By maybe a factor of ten. First thing I saw when I crash-landed here was that blown-out resort in Singapore.”

“Yeah, that was them. The Ten Rings. They wanted to disrupt Singapore’s economy.”

“Seems to have worked, if the exchange rate is any indication.”

“Oh, it worked, all right. Bastards.”

“I wish I could help you. I was jealous as hell when you guys flew off on your mission. Haven’t felt that in a while.”

“What, you lose interest in fighting? After Steve?”

“Lost interest in livin’, pal. Sorry to be so blunt.”

“Nah. Don’t apologize. If I didn’t have those morons upstairs... I wouldn’t have gotten through this last year without them. Didn’t want to. They dragged me back to life, kicking and screaming. I don’t know how you did it without them.”

There was no shred of doubt or pretense in Barnes’s voice, and he was looking at Bucky as he said it. Bucky’s eyes flew open and he turned to Barnes. “You believe me.”

Barnes frowned and hesitated before saying, “I believe that you’re another me somehow. That multiverse thing’s as good a reason as any, I guess. And Stark says it’s theoretically possible. I believe you’re telling the truth about what you’ve been through. Do I believe you’re the me that Marya knew? I don’t know. I just… I don’t know. And that’s the thing. She’s such a part of things here, I can’t take the risk that you’re not. I know what she’s capable of. I know how she feels about her Sergeant, and I also know there’s nothing she won’t do for someone she’s loyal to.”

Bucky grinned. “Not to mention how polite and respectful of authority she is, all the while she’s disobeying your direct orders behind your back.”

“And she’s so fucking sweet about it you can’t stand to discipline her.”

“Even when she tells you to your face she’d do it again.”

Barnes and Bucky shake their heads, identical fond smiles on their faces as they roll their eyes in unison.

“That’s one of the reasons Stark leads the team, you know. Some people think that role should go with the shield. I don’t. It should go to the one most capable, and Stark’s been here since the beginning. That’s the main reason, but… Not gonna lie, Marya’s another. He can say no to her, enforce consequences when she steps out of line. Me, I just …” Barnes huffs a laugh and shrugs helplessly.

And that’s when Bucky realizes that Barnes is in love with Marya.

#The Avengers #Captain America #The Winter Soldier #Bucky Barnes #Sam Wilson #Clint Barton #Bruce Banner #Natasha Romanoff #Tony Stark #Sebastian Stan

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theysaywhatasadsight · 5 years

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Wedding Bells, Part One (Steve Rogers x Desi!Reader)

A/n: *Slides up to you* Good Evening (technically its morning hehe) but this fic was made possible by Amy (some may know her, she was formerly @thelazypangolin ), by @messy-random-bitch and @officially-tonynat-shrine who listened to my crazy headcanons and gave me amazing ones. @nasarogers is the clueless American I would die for (love you bby) and @shurisneakers and @chillingbucky wanted to be tagged. Technically this is a desi au, so translations are right next to the sentence and some pop culture references are in the glossary. The story is based in Delhi so if any of y’all live there don’t come for my head skkssk. (P.S.: IDK if the ‘person sitting in the lap of another person in a car’ is technically illegal here or not? Imagine my surprise when I went to Europe and found out it’s illegal there RIP. So ignore the “is this actually allowed?” question, please and thank you.

Warnings: Floof, some violence and blood, swearing (well it’s in another language)

"Agent (L/N), thoughts?" The post mission debrief was often long and complicated but this time, one of her many gods had clearly smiled upon her as it was over in an hour. Most of the junior agents had cleared out of the room, leaving behind a few of the senior ones and the director of SHIELD. "Don't let Richardson go next time; all he does is whine and make extremely bad decisions. Our job is to provide assistance to the Avengers, not to be heroes ourselves. Let's keep ourselves a bit on the down low." "Agreed." Smith piped up. There were nods around the table. "I'll talk to Richardson, push him on a desk job for a while." Everyone stood up and filled out. Walking beside Nick, YN grabbed his tablet for him. "Always working, Sir." "Unlike you, Agent (L/N). A whole month for a wedding? It's not you that's getting married is it?" He looked completely serious but she could see the glint of mischief in his eye. "What? I haven't taken a single holiday in a year. Besides,its my cousin's wedding; they're pretty close." "I suppose you're not joining us for the Islamabad mission?" "Not really, already I get called unpatriotic too much. Good luck!"

She handed off the debrief files in the Avengers' living room. A few were lazing around, some off to shower or maybe nap. She herself wanted one, not wanting to wrestle with a saree and a suitcase. "So I hear you're not showing up for the next month?" She handed the file to Natasha while Tony looked up from his phone where he was declining with Pepper and Morgan who were away to Chicago for a meeting and visiting Pepper's family. After Ultron, it was always better to have physical copies of files. "Yeah, cousin getting married." "Oooh, with the number of days you were leaving I thought it was yours." "Don't, Fury already made that joke. And besides, wouldn't I invite you lot to my hypothetical wedding?" She smiled as she sat down on the sofa next to him, grabbing an apple from the coffee table. "Considering it was Steve's wedding too I would think we would already be invited, I did call you all to mine." He smirked. Y/N nearly choked on her apple. "Wait, what?!" "Darling, we know you've been hooking up. Or planning to." Natasha sighed and glared at Tony. "So much staring at each other on missions. You always covering his ass, and might I remind you of the time he went into a coma after a mission and you nearly ripped the place apart?" "Clearly, your super senses are gone because there is nothing there. Nada. Zilch. There is absolutely no potential there. We're just colleagues." "Colleagues who hooked up once? Last new year's you two were slobbering over each other. You left Bucky and Me dancing alone to that...what was it called again?" "Sheila ki Jawani*?" "Yes! Amazing song, by the way. Movie didn't make a lick of sense but then again, which heist movie does?" Glad at the change of topic, she smiled. "Do you need more movie recommendations?" "Nope, Bucky and I still have your old list to go through." "Call me if you need explanations. Only WhatsApp calls though, I'm not shelling out a fortune to explain the reincarnation of Shanti Priya* to you."

Hungry, jet lagged and extremely fatigued she landed at the Delhi airport, hoping against hope that the crowd assembled at the pick up was for the Tik Tok star that was also on her flight and not because her whole clan hadn't seen her for 3 years. But when was she ever lucky? When she had left the army to join SHIELD everyone had been very disappointed in her. Not that any of them knew. For immediate family, she was in HR for Stark Industries and for the rest she was in 'Amreeka, doing something or the other'.

When they told her she would be sleeping alongside her younger cousin who was training to be a doctor she just sighed. The nerd would probably study the whole night and keep the light on. Maybe she could do some pending work; jet lag would keep her awake anyway. Work, yes. Work would keep her awake. Definitely not daydreaming about a pair of blue eyes that wouldn't go away; the owner of whom was the biggest fattu (coward) she had ever seen.

He missed Y/N. It had barely been 4 days since she was gone. He should ideally know better. Fraternising among agents wasn't good. Her job would be in danger if anyone found out. He never really had a thing for rules though. "Good God, Rogers, stop moping about and give her a call." "I-what?" "Yes." Natasha frowned at him from where she was leaning against the countertop. He was crushing the cardamom, trying to figure out if it went after the chai was done or before. "Ask her when the cardamom goes in. I think it's before the whole thing boils." "I, uh, I'll look up a recipie." "Care to tell me why Steve Rogers, who loves coffee as black as his soul is trying to replicate YN's sweet as hell chai? Couldn't you get some from Starbucks?" "That's no chai,that's just tea and milk. She had it once and almost threw it at the barista's head...Nat, why are you looking at me like that?" "Nothing, nothing at all."

"They're no longer in Islamabad." "What?" "Someone leaked the details of the raid to them. They're moving it to India now, possibly to the capital. They have enough contacts to pull it off, even HYDRA's helping them." "New Delhi, isn't that where Agent (L/N) is now?" "Fury, she's on vacation; besides she's not picking up any of her calls." Natasha glared at Nick. "A radioactive gas that can take out the entire subcontinent and a dude who's not stopping at anything to further his our-return-to-the-dark-ages agenda? Pretty sure it beats all weddings. Send someone with the briefing and gather your team. We’re sorting this shit out, fast."

"No. Absolutely not. I'm not going to show up at her door asking her to cancel her family commitments and go back to work." "Really, the concern you two have for each other is extremely sweet and nauseating; but you have to do it. Get in, get recon and get back in contact. If the rumour is true we'll have to assemble the whole team." The former assassin rolled her eyes at Steve's aghast face. "I got her address off an old file; I'll ask her to pick you up. And please, don't get lost somewhere; we really don't have any spare agents to track you down." "I've been outside the States before, Widow. And using confidential information for personal purposes? Nefarious." "This is the reward I get for being a good wingwoman. Fine, don't come crying to me when you're invited to her actual wedding." As he set about packing he daydreamed about jumping off the top of the compound and wondering if his feet would still work to escape into the surrounding forest.

She got the text the minute Natasha assumed Steve's plane took off. "Your boyfriend is headed towards Delhi. Introduce him, be the black sheep you are and for the love of God read the files and make a plan." The rest was just code saying the plans had changed, the expected mission derailed. When her family began pestering her, saying that her turn at the altar was next and asking about boyfriends, she had blurted Steve's name by accident, the fact that it made a perfect cover was a different matter. That's what happens when you space out while talking to Sunita Chachi*, woman has a tongue sharper than Gordon Ramsay's knife. Her mother had just smiled sadly and asked two of YN's younger cousins to share a bed when told another guest would be joining them.

30 minutes after the plane landed he immediately wanted to go back. What he was used to was executing secret and well-coordinated missions, not the actual planning and coordinating. Sam argued he was growing soft. He just liked listening to YN's voice. And now he was in an unfamiliar land with no foreseeable end to his stay and a wedding to attend, apparently. YN smiled at him at the receiving line, smiling as a lover receiving a spouse after a long separation. She walked up to him and whispered "You're my boyfriend from work, you know zero hindi and Natasha introduced us." She embraced him and leaned forward for a kiss. It lasted shorter than he would've liked. She continued whispering as she grasped his hand and lead him to the car which already had three people in it. "Did you pick up more guests?" "Nope, they just wanted to see you first." Opening the door as Steve tossed his bag in the back she yelled something at the assembled children and got in the right. Was the kid in the front supposed to drive? "Do you need an invitation?" One of the kids yelled out.

He had judged wrong. There were not only three teenagers, there were two more kids who had been too shy to outright stare at him like their elder siblings (he assumed) had. One sat in his lap, staring outside the window. The others chose instead to glare at him unnervingly. YN drove, swearing at everything. One of the younger ones laughed at something she said and immediately had his ears covered and shushed."Didi* don't teach Gudiya bad words!"

"Arey baba sorry, tu toh janta hai traffic kitna bura hai; akele chalane ki adaat ho gayi hai bhenchod. Sorry." (“You know how bad traffic is, I’m used to driving alone, sisterfucker” Basically the reader’s saying the traffic is the worst and how she’s used to driving alone and hence swears often while driving; also people from Delhi apparently like to attach swears to everything.) She grinned as her cousin gasped again. She was at the moral, change-the-world stage. YN missed that.

“So, change of plans?” Pinky grinned at Y/N as she looked up from a complicated looking textbook. The kid had somehow made it to medical school without losing her mind or her calm demeanour. “I’m only gonna switch places at night, right now let me study Anatomy.”Sighing at her cousin’s confused stare, she glared back. “Arey you’ll want to sleep next to your boyfriend na?” “Uh, yeah, I mean, thank you, but it’s no problem. I don’t want you to get in trouble because of me.” “Calm down. If we get caught sneaking around in the middle of the night its worse for the two of you. I got into MBBS, I can basically get away with murder now.” she smiled. Y/N wondered whether her cousin would be a sociopath or a leader later. She went about chalking up the updated plan for the recon, only hoping her family would behave themselves around Steve. She caught some part of her wishing it was the real thing so that the poor guy’s suffering wouldn’t be in vain.

Hey bhagwaan (oh God), I need gangajal* and a stiff drink. Also a lobotomy.

“How did that idiot even cross the border this quick? And how are we getting informed this late? This is going to be a logistical nightmare, the government is going to put the pressure on us.” “Maybe someone exposed him or he got pushed back down on the social hierarchy. It’s a mess.” On the pretense of sightseeing, Y/n had dragged Steve away from her nosy relatives to get details for the now completely changed mission. "Can I try that?" He gestured to the bowl of chaat* in her hands. "Don't cry if you find it too spicy then. You couldn't even tolerate my butter chicken; even my youngest cousin can eat that." "My tongue is really not fond of burning and not being able to taste anything for a fortnight." "Oh? What is it fond of then?" His answering blush made her smile. "I-uh, we need to report within three days, Nat is busy getting everyone together and ready for the mission." "The engagement is in 2 days! How are we even going to get out?" "How much do you like this cousin anyway?" "How. Dare. You. Rahul is one of the few I actually like." "Yeah, how many are there? I lost count at 13." She punched his arm and snorted, earning a smile from him and a glare from the chaatwala*.

YN truly regretted coming back here. The never ending taunts, the upcoming solo recon mission (that she would have to give Rahul’s engagement a miss for, he was one of her favorites too) and the fact that the guy she had been thirsting over the past few months was suddenly her so-called boyfriend. Massaging her temples as she got up to get ready, she hoped desperately the recon would not involving fighting. She already had thinning hair due to the stresses of being a S.H.I.E.L.D. agent, her hair being yanked out while pins were still attached to her hair wouldn’t help the cause.

"Mummy!" She yelled over the din of the loud, jarring music. Her mother was smiling and gossiping with her sister-in-law. "Thoda kaam aa gaya; Delhi wale office Jana padega." (Some work popped up, I’ll have to go to the Delhi office) "Itni raat ko? Uss gore ko lekar?" (So late? With the foreigner in tow?”) "Are kuch nahi hoga, bohot important hai, warna nahi jaati." (Nothing will happen. It’s too important, otherwise I wouldn’t have gone.) "Wapis aa jaiyo jaldi, raat ko ghumne safe nahi hota." (Come back quick, It's not safe to roam at night.) "Pakka." (I promise)

"MADARCHOD!" (”MOTHERFUCKER!”) She grunted as she ducked, the bullet nearly embedding in her collarbone. She fired back two shots, one at a goon's head and one at his accomplice's knees. Whipping her head at a noise, she gasped as Steve has a bullet graze him as one of them took a lucky shot at him. He only winced. The goddamn lehenga* got in the way of her running after the idiot who could run like fucking Milkha Singh* even after being shot in the knees. They both chased. The recon turned ugly after someone spotted the tent she was wearing that was pretending to be a skirt. If they somehow got out alive, she'd burn this thing. By the time she caught up to Steve, who had left her long behind, she came upon a sight that gave her a heart attack. The men (apparently some were laying in wait for them) all lay dead in various poses, with Steve in the middle grunting and struggling to get up. Firing at someone who awoke, she leaned down, cradling his head in her hands. "Steve. Hey, whoa. Don't die on me. Where are you hurt?" He was bleeding all over her skirt. "Knife to the ribs. Two or three times..may...maybe. Hurts like a bitch." "I'm getting you up. We're going home, okay?"

This was a terrible situation. Somehow supporting the huge, burly figure of an extremely injured Steve, she set him down, leaning against the bike they had zipped around on and somehow escaped on, looking for her phone in the carrier attached. She lived this bike even when she lived here; it belonged to her uncle who would give the keys to only her. The sagaai* had clearly ended an hour or so ago. People still milled about, probably the men from the tent house they had booked for the whole tamasha*. “Shobhit, neeche aa. Garden ke side. Aur Bunty aur Puneet ko bhi leke aaiyo.” (”Shobhit, come downstairs, to the garden side. Bring Bunty and Puneet with you.") “Itni raat ko kya kar rahi ho bahar? Khatam ho gaya aapka office ka kaam?” ("What are you doing out so late, is your office work done?") “Are tu neeche aa, sab samjhaati hu.” ("You come downstairs, I’ll explain everything" )

“Samjhaana agar shuru karti toh achha hota.” "It’ll be good if you start explaining now." Shobit muttered as all three of her cousins stared at the crumpled figure of Captain America on the ground, to their cousin wincing in pain, her lehenga covered with blood, again to Steve. “Isko uthake Pinky ke kamre tak jaane mei meri madad kar. Yeh marr warr gaya toh naukri gayi meri.” "Help me pick him up and take him to Pinky’s room. If he dies, I’m losing my job."

“First of all, I’m not a doctor. Yet.” Pinky also did her fair share of staring at everyone. Y/N could feel her eye twitching. Whether it was out of anger, stress, or the false eyelash that had ripped from her lash line as she drove like a madwoman in the traffic, no helmet or gloves. Steve screaming like a grandma as he held on for dear life was a tiny bit amusing though. Endearing maybe, Nope, definitely not endearing.

“I should tell you that because I have very, and I mean very little experience in sewing. Particularly sewing up bodies professionally. If he dies, I am not responsible.” She yawned once, extremely sleepy. “That being said, someone get cotton, Dettol, and uh my sewing kit is in the left front pocket of my backpack. Jija*, there’s no anesthesia, but I suppose you don’t need it, super strength and all. Didi*, aisa muh mat banao (don’t make that face), just because none of the oldies know who he is doesn’t mean we’re stupid too.” Y/N shut her gaping mouth.

“He’ll live.” Pinky said as everyone in the room collectively sighed. The suture had been painful to witness, Y/N biting her lip so hard she tasted copper. Steve seemed okay now. When he had taken that guard’s knife to the stomach, Y/N’s heart had stopped. The fear she felt, that was no general fear at seeing someone stabbed or even a friendly fear (was there even such a thing or was 3 AM her just rambling?). The panic she felt was heartbeaking. “Make those self realisation faces later, Di. I’m tired and I just want some sleep. “Jija ko unke kamre tak chodke aa. Koi raaste mei mile bol dena bike bhid gayi thi, hospital se aate hue late ho gaya tha.” (Jija is the hindi word for sister’s husband. Pinky’s telling him to drop him to his room and if anyone asks to tell them he had an accident, the bike hit something and they were late coming from the hospital.) “Tu sabko heart attack dilayegi kya?” (Do you want to give everyone a heart attack?") “Aur koi bahana mile toh batao.” ("If you have any other excuse then tell"

As everyone scattered, Y/N shut the door to change. Her cousin just lay down on the bed, semi-asleep. She cracked one eye open when Y/N reached out her hand to switch off the light, whispering “So you are a secret agent?” “Nope, I sell veggies with Captain America.” “Ugh, way to thank me for saving your boyfriend’s life, with terrible puns.” “He’s not my...leave it. Good night. Oh, and PInky?” Pinky hummed. “Thanks.” “So jao.” (Go to Sleep)

“Tell Romanoff we’ll need backup. They clearly planned ahead for the move, the facility is impossible to get into, and now they know we’re coming. Also, Steve is injured." “Very well, we’ll invite ourselves to the wedding. Take care if your boyfriend until then."Natasha sounded worried but her tone was light. “Bring a gift, I’m not keeping strangers in my family home without payment.”

Glossary *-Sheila ki Jawani is a pretty popular Bollywood Item Song. Played at every wedding /party since 2010 *-The Reincarnation of Shanti Priya is a reference to the film Om Shanti Om where the leads get resurrected after having an unhappy ending *Chachi- Father's younger brother's wife; aka yn's aunt *Gangajal- Water from the river Ganges that Hindus consider sacred, its used for purification purposes (guess why Y/N wanted it *wink wink*) *Didi- Elder Sister *Chaat: some spicy-sweet snack, it's a general term; desis feel free to imagine your favourite. *Chaatwala: the person who owns the chaat shop *Lehenga: a crop top and floor-length skirt outfit worn at weddings and traditional functions *Milkha Singh: famous Indian athlete, also known as "The Flying Sikh" because of how fast he was. *sagaai- engagement *tamasha- a sarcastic way of saying how over the top the whole wedding is.

#steve rogers x reader #steve x desi!reader #steve rogers x y/n #captain america x reader #captain america x y/n #captain america imagine #mcu imagine #marvel imagine #marvel x reader #mcu x reader #mcu x y/n

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barnesandrogersfanfics · 5 years

Text

Unexpected Arrival - 2

Pairing: Eventual Bucky x Reader, Possible Steve x Reader

Summary: As if working with the Avengers wasn't exciting enough.... an unexpected visitor is about to change your life forever.

When the team got back from their mission Natasha went straight to Y/N’s room to check on her. When she opened the door and found the bed empty she started to panic, she had told her to go see Bruce if she got any worse.

"F.R.I.D.A.Y where's Y/N?" Nat asked the A.I.

"Agent Y/L/N was taken to medical by Captain Rodgers and Mr Stark"

"Shit!" Nat cursed as she turned and started running towards the medical floor.

"Nat? Whats going on?" Bucky asked seeing her running towards him.

"Y/N was taken to medical! I knew there was something wrong with her before we left! I should've trusted my gut and taken her there myself!"

"Well lets go check on her then" he said getting into the elevator with Nat.

Nat rushed out of the elevator and saw Tony and Bruce standing at one of the doors looking in while they spoke quietly to eachother.

"Hey, what happened is she okay?" Nat asked quickly wanting answers.

"Shes fine, we handled the situation" Tony said truthfully "did you not get my message? I tried calling you"

"My phone got trashed in the fight...."

"Its been an interesting night lets just start there" Bruce said running a hand through his hair.

"Interesting is the biggest understatement of the year Banner! It was literally the shock of a lifetime!! Especially for that girl in there" Tony said pointing towards the room behind him.

"Does someone wanna tell me what the hell is going on??" Nat snapped.

"You should probably take a look for yourself.... you’d never believe me otherwise".

Natasha walked over quickly, as she looked into the room Y/N was sleeping soundly.... Steve was sat in the chair next to her..... with a baby??!!

"What the fuck...... she.... she was pregnant???" Nat said turning to face the men behind her.

"What??" Bucky asked walking over to see for himself.... when he saw Steve holding the tiny baby in a yellow blanket he turned to the others looking horrified.

"Yep, a healthy baby girl. Born at 04:34am weighing 5lb 9oz delivered by yours truly!" Tony said sounding pleased of himself.

"How is that possible..... theres no way...." Nat was saying quietly to no one in particular.

"If you’re this shocked, can you imagine how shes feeling?" Bruce said nodded towards the room.

"Is it Steve's?" Nat asked seeing him holding the tiny baby and smiling.

"They say its not, she wont tell us who the father is until shes had a chance to tell him first"

"So she didnt know she was pregnant?" Bucky asked from beside Nat, his eyes glued to the tiny baby in Steves arms.

"Not a clue. She thought she had bad stomach flu" Bruce answered looking over her chart.

"She had been sick, she told me she thought it was stomach flu before we left. This is huge!"

"No shit" Tony rolled his eyes "she's gonna be out for a while, you want me to call you when she wakes up?"

"Yeah that would be good" Nat nodded

"I'm gonna check in with Steve quickly and make sure he’s okay" Bucky said and walked toward the room.

"just keep it down i don't want her waking up yet, shes had a tough night"

"Sure" Bucky nodded and headed inside.

Steve looked up when he heard the door open and smiled at his best friend.

"Guess you guys heard about the unexpected visitor we had" Steve said looking down at the baby in his arms.

"Yeah.... they just told us.... a..are they both okay?"

"Yeah they’re both perfect. Y/N is wiped out but after what she went through i cant say i blame her. It was amazing Buck!"

"You were there?... for the birth?"

"Yeah she wouldn't let me leave" he chuckled "that woman has got one hell of a grip i tell ya! Nearly crushed my hands. And this little lady..... i cant stop staring at her Buck! Shes so tiny and perfect. Look!" Steve motioned for Bucky to come and take a closer look at the baby.

"Wow.... shes beautiful! Look at her tiny little hands...."

"She keeps making the cutest little cooing sounds i swear my heart is melting for this kid" Steve gushed as Bucky pulled up a seat "You wanna hold her?" Steve offered his friend.

"No.... no i might hurt her" he said looking down at his metal arm.

"You wont, it'll be fine. Besides i really need to go to the bathroom"

"Oh... Okay" he said letting out a shaky breath as Steve stood up and passed him the baby.

"You good?" Steve asked checking with Bucky before he left.

"Yeah.... i got her" he nodded settling the baby in his flesh arm.

"I'll be right back" Steve assured him before slipping out quietly.

The room was quiet as i slowly opened my eyes, i could already sense there was someone else in here with me but just assumed it was Steve still. When i turned to look i was shocked to see Bucky sitting in the chair holding the baby.

"Hey..... you’re back" i said quietly so i didn't surprise him.

"Hey, Yeah we got back about an hour ago" he replied with a small smile "you had a busy night huh?"

"You could say that" i said pulling myself up in the bed so i was sitting up against the pillows.

"She's perfect Y/N" Bucky stated looking down at the yellow bundle in his arms.

"Yeah she is" i agreed "Buck....she's yours" I added quickly, there was no easy way to tell him that he was a dad "you know that right?"

"I had a feeling she might be" he nodded slowly and gave me a smile. Bucky seemed surprisingly calm about the whole thing actually.

"I swear i had no idea i was pregnant! I would've told you if i did. Having this dropped on you is huge.... i mean we're not even together! It was a one time thing and now we're parents!" I rambled away nervously "i was still going on missions for christ sake!"

"Y/N you didn't know, of course you'd still go on missions"

"I don't expect you to be okay with this, i can do this on my own.... no one needs to know shes yours, if thats what you want?"

"Is that what you want?" Bucky asked looking at me with sad eyes.

"No! Of course i want you to be apart of her life.... she needs her dad too. Im not ashamed to tell people she's yours Buck" i added knowing that was what he was really asking. He was asking if i was embarrassed about people finding out i had slept with him "but if you’re not ready for this i completely understand, i wont pressure you into it".

"Hey, you’re awake" Steve said smiling as he walked back into the room again interrupting whatever conversation i was having with Bucky.

"Yeah" i nodded with a quick smile before looking over at Bucky holding our daughter.....It really was a beautiful sight, he was being so careful with her. Steve must have noticed something in the way i looked at Bucky and Bucky was looking at his daughter because he suddenly let out an "oh my god....".

Bucky and i both looked up at him with wide eyes "what?" We said in unison waiting for Steve to tell us what was wrong.

"Is.... is she...." he pointed at Bucky and looked at you for confirmation.

"Yeah, she's Bucky's" i confirmed casually trying my best to act like this wasn't a huge deal.

"I didn't even know you two were a thing.....you never said anything Buck?"

"We're not together Steve thats why he never said anything" i said to save Bucky having to explain to his friend.

"So it was just a one time thing?"

"Yeah" i said with a shrug, i was trying my hardest to kept my shit together and keep calm. Keep my heart from trying to explode from my chest, i was pretty sure the two super soldiers could hear my heart racing though.

"Hey Steve, could you ask Nat to bring me a change of clothes down i really need to take a shower i feel disgusting" i said changing the subject before it became any more awkward.

"Sure, i know shes waiting to see you and meet this one here" he nodded to the baby in Bucky's arms "speaking of.... shes gonna need a name, have you thought about it yet?"

"Not yet, i don't want to rush into it and regret it. Parents normally have 9 months to decide on a name not 9 hours"

"Fair point" Steve chuckled "i'll go get Nat for you".

"Thanks.....hey Steve?" i called getting his attention as he reached the door.

"Yeah?"

"Thank you for being there for me today, it means a lot"

"Of course" he blushed before leaving me alone with Bucky and our daughter.

"I wish i could've been there" he said quietly "I'm sorry doll".

"Its fine, we didn't know what was going to happen Buck".

He nodded slowly but looked kinda sad that he had missed it, or maybe it was because Steve had been there and not him.

"I should go and let you get some rest"

"You can stay, you can watch her while i take a shower if you want?"

"You don't mind? You trust me with her?"

"Of course i do! Buck you’re her dad you’re not going to let anything happen to her".

"Id die before i let anything happen to her" he stated staring lovingly at her.

"See" i said with a chuckle "ive got nothing to worry about. Well almost nothing"

"What do you mean?"

"I have nothing for her, no clothes, diapers....no nursery. All i can do is feed her right now. Tony said he'll take care of it all but i feel bad leaving it all to him"

"He’s probably enjoying it doll you know what he’s like"

"Yeah i know, i just wish i had had time to do all that stuff myself"

"You would've kept her then? If you had found out you were pregnant?"

"I would" i nodded happily and truthfully.

A knock on the door pulled my attention and i turned to see Nat making her way in with a bag.

"Hey sweetheart, i leave you alone for a couple of hours and you go and have a baby?"

"Yeah sorry about that, who knew?" I laughed as she wrapped her arms around me and gave me a tight squeeze.

"Let me see!" She cooed as she walked over to Bucky to get a good look at the tiny bundle in his arms.

"Oh my god shes so precious! Absolute perfection. Y/N.... Can i hold her?"

Bucky looked like he didn't want to part with her but eventually handed her over to Nat gently.

"Hey I'm your auntie Nat. Uncle Bucky doesnt get to hog all the cuddles does he" she said rocking the baby gently.

"Erm about that Nat..... its not Uncle Buck.... she's his daughter"

Nat looked up at me with wide eyes and then looked at Bucky "what?? When did that happen??!" She said loudly causing the baby to stir slightly "shhhh im sorry baby girl go back to sleep" she said quietly.

"I'll give you two a few minutes to talk, i'll come back to watch our girl while you take your shower"

"Thanks Buck" i smiled and watched him leave the room.

"Sooooo, spill! You never told me you and Barnes were a thing!"

"We're not a thing, it was just the once"

"When?? You didn't even tell me you two slept together! We're supposed to be best friends!"

"You remember that mission we went on, the one where we had to stay at that safe house for the night to make sure they weren't tailing us?"

"Alaska?"

"Yep that would be the one. We were both beat up and were helping each other clean up.... one thing led to another and here we are" i said pointing to my baby daughter in Nat's arms.

"And it was just a one time thing...."

"Yeah, it never happened again. He acted like nothing had happened the morning after so i didn't make a big deal about it. We just carried on as normal" i shrugged.

"Did you want things to change? With you and Bucky i mean"

"Honestly? I was hoping it would" i finally admitted "i had liked him for ages Nat and when we finally.... i thought maybe he felt the same way. But clearly i was wrong"

"Y/N..... you should tell him! You guys have a daughter now"

"Thats not gonna make him suddenly want me Nat" i laughed "it doesn't matter anyway, I've already accepted that we'll only ever be friends" i said as i slowly climbed out of bed to grab the bag that Nat had brought with her.

"Hey be careful!" She said taking a few steps towards me.

"Im fine Nat just a bit sore, i can get out of Bed by myself" i told her as the door opened and Bucky came walking back in.

"take it easy doll, should you even be up and about yet?"

"Guys I'm fine, really" i tried to tell them "i just need a shower"

"Okay, Buck you wanna take your girl and i'll get momma to the shower" Nat said handing over the baby, he soon had his daughter settled against his chest and took a seat again.

"You’re a natural Barnes" Nat said sounding surprised walking over to me and taking the bag "lets go get you cleaned up".

"I wont be long Buck, you okay with her?" I asked wanting to make sure he felt comfortable being left alone.

"We're good, go take care of yourself. We'll be waiting for you when you get back" he smiled.

#bucky barnes #bucky x reader #winter soldier #bucky fanfic #bucky imagine #bucky x you #sebastian stan #unexpectedarrival #steve x reader #natasha romanoff

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weirdxfunny-colors-blog · 7 years

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All I want for Christmas is you || Natasha Romanoff

Song: Mariah Carey - All I want for Christmas is you

Summary: Nat loves you, but doesn’t have a guts to ask you out. But then there’s the Stark’s Christmas Party.

Warnings: cuteness and bad writing (I just don’t know how to write Nat)

Pairing: Romanoff x fem! reader

A/N: I’m literally sweating, I’m so tired after work and it’s so hot, I just can’t.

________________________________________________________________

Natasha wanted to say she didn't feel anything to that fire girl. She wanted and she did, but Clint just smirked. Nat cursed under her breath and took a sip of her drink.

- I know you better than you think - he whispered playfully. Nat rolled her eyes. She almost had enough. If it wasn't for Clint and booze, she would be already in training room. She didn't want to be here now. Stark and Rhodey were already dancing on the table, Thor, Bucky and Steve were watching them and laughing, Banner sat with Dr Cho and talked with her, probably about some science. And there was [Y/N], sitting with Sam, Pietro, Wanda and Vision. They were playing Truth or Dare and Nat just wanted to punch Mr Falcon right in these perfect teeth, because he was just too friendly toward [Y/N].

- Leave it, Clint, really - she mumbled and turned her gaze from the [y/h/c] girl.

- I'm not saying it's bad, Nat, you know it - he said, now looking at his beer. - I'm happy that you found someone you really like, but if you're going to hide it, it will be painfull.

- I know it - she whispered and clenched her palm. - I just... I don't know. I just have that feeling that she's too precious for me. I mean, I was in the Red Room, I was killing people without hesitation. And I know she's a badass, I saw her on the field. It's just... She never killed anyone. She's here just because she's a mutant and can controll a fire...

For a second there was silence and then quiet snort, so Nat looked at Clint with raised eyebrows.

- Wow, sorry, I just... I didn't expect something like that. Sorry - he cleared his throat. - Okay, you got a point. You killed, she didn't. And?

Natasha raised her eyebrows once again.

- When I didn't have a guts to ask Laura out you told me that past doesn't matter and now you're saying something completely different. Besides, you didn't have that problem with Banner - Clint shrugged and took a sip of his beer.

- Yeah, because with Banner it was just a stupid crush - Nat hissed more to her drink than to her best friend.

- Okay, okay. I feel like you don't want to talk about it now - Barton sighed and turned around on the stool to face the rest of the team. - Do you want to join them? - he nodded toward the Thor and Steve. Bucky joined the Truth or Dare team, so Stark and Rhodey didn't have the biggest audience.

- Yeah, why not? - Nat sighed and hopped off the stool.

- So... What are we doing on Christmas this year? - Steve asked. Bucky looked at him, shrugged and got back to eating his cereal.

- Stark is already planning the party - Natasha mumbled, scrolling through the news.

- Did I hear 'party'? When, where and who's going to be there? - [Y/N] walked through the door, still in her pyjamas and still with bed hair. Nat looked up and tried her best not to smile at the sight, but failed miserably, so she just went back to reading news.

- Here, in tower. 25 December. We're going to be there. And a lot of other people too - Clint answered, drinking his 3rd cup of coffee already.

- Oh, nice. So in 2 days. Okay - [Y/N] mumbled to herself and opened the fridge. She stood there for a moment, but then she closed it. - I need to speak to Wanda. Maybe she has some nice dress - she muttered and almost run out of the kitchen. Natasha laughed quietly, but stopped when she noticed Clint's smirk.

- Guess who knows something very interesting! - Sam sang, when he walked into the living room. Now there was only him, Nat, Wanda, Vision and Bucky. Everyone looked up at Sam. - It's about [Y/N] - he wiggled his eyebrows and smiled at Natasha. - So, apparently, she's...

Suddenly someone's hand pressed against his lips. Red light surrounded him in the same moment that Vision appeared in front of Falcon.

- It's not nice to tell everyone someone's secret - Pietro said in sweet tone and let the Falcon go, but Wanda still had Sam surrounded with her magic. Bucky was almost killing him with his gaze.

- Okay, okay, sorry. I won’t say anything - Sam said, raising his hands. Wanda's magic disappeared, Vision got back to his seat, but Buck was still trying to kill Sam with one single glare. Falcon walked out of the living room, mumbling something about not having fun with these people.

Nat sighed looking at herself in the mirror. She knew she looked good, but in her head there was still the million what if's. What if her dress was too tight? What if it wasn't elegant enough for Christmas party? What if her makeup was too bold? What if the curls at the back of her head didn't look as good as she thought? What if the heels didn't actually match her dress? She groaned quietly and looked at the ceiling. When did she start to think like that?

- Jesus fucking Christ, what that girl is doing to me? - she whispered into blank space with small smile. She shook her head and turned toward the door.

When she got to the party, there was already a lot of people. Natasha looked around to see if anyone from her team was there. She didn't have problem with people or crowds. She was freaking Black Widow for God's sake. But now she didn't want to talk to women who just wanted to show off their bodies and judge everyone else or with men who would look at her boobs and probably try to drag her back to their room. So she looked around carefully and she almost got a heart attack when she saw [Y/N]. Her [y/e/c] eyes was almost sparkling, her brightly red lips stretched in wide smile as she listened to some man. She nodded at him and looked around discreetly. When she locked her eyes with Natasha's, she sent her the awkward 'help me' look. Nat nodded, put on her the best poker face and walked confidently toward [Y/N]. When she was close enough to hear their coversation, she almost attacked the man.

- But you're too pretty to be lesbian. I mean, you don't look like one. So, if you're saying that, because you want to disgust me, it's not working, beautiful...

And then he reached to [Y/N]'s face and tried to touch her cheek, but she took a step back. Natasha was already next to him. She walked past him and looked at [Y/N], looking for any sign of fear. When she didn't find any, she turned around to face the guy, partly hiding [Y/N] behind her.

- Why did you try to touch my friend? - she asked, looking straight into his eyes.

- Oh, I'm sorry. Have we met? I'm Connor Stevad - he smiled slightly.

- I don't care. I asked you a question, it'd be nice, if you answer - she said, still not breaking the eye contact. Her gaze was apparently too intence for the man, because he broke it after a few seconds. He mumbled something about his friend and walked away quickly.

- Geez, he was annoying - [Y/N] laughed slightly, when Nat turned around to look at her. Romanoff was serious for a few more seconds, but she couldn't not smile, when [Y/N] was looking at her like that, with that soft smile and that sparkling eyes.

- Yeah, that type of guys are the worst - she sighed, letting her guard down. She felt like she was drowning in [y/e/c] eyes, like she was melting just because of [Y/N]'s smile. And she felt like [Y/L/N] had control over Nat's mind. And she probably did.

- Oh, look. It's Sam. And Buck!

The moment ended and Nat was dragged back to reality. [Y/N] was already walking toward the boys, so Romanoff followed her, wanting it or not. She didn't really listen to anyone from that moment. So knew that she would flip, if Sam and [Y/N] start to flirt in front of her, so she excused herself and walked up to the bar.

Several hours later the party was still at its best. Nat finally sat next to other Avengers, between Banner and Clint. They were talking with some guests. Romanoff tried to talk with them too, but her eyes always tried to find [Y/N]. Damn, what that girl did to the coldhearted Black Widow? Natasha was asking herself that for about year now.

Now Romanoff was watching as [Y/N] and Sam danced and talked, clearly about something upsetting [y/h/c] girl. Suddenly Falcon looked at Nat, catching her staring. He smirked and said something to [Y/N], but she just shook her head. Sam stepped back and grabbed [Y/L/N], turned around and pushed toward the Nat, Bruce and Clint. And when they finally was next to the sofa, Sam looked at Nat.

- I want to talk with these gentelmen right here. Can you, please, accompany [Y/N/N]? - he said with his evil smirk. Romanoff cursed in her head, but smiled sweetly and nodded.

- Of course, Sam - she said, her voice almost dripping with sugar. She stood up and turned toward the girl. - Do you want to get a drink?

- Yeah, drink would be nice - [Y/N] said, her voice slightly higher than usual. She cleared her throat and put her hair behind her ear. Romanoff smiled and led her toward the bar.

- So, ladies and gentelmen! What's a Christmas party without the winter's best hits, right? - Stark said to the mic. Romanoff sighed and rolled her eyes. Tony was having a time of his life, just like on every party he attended. When 'All I want for Christmas is you' started to play, Nat felt a gentle grip on her wrist. She tensed instinctively, but relaxed when she saw it was [Y/N]'s hand. Romanoff looked at the girl concerned. [Y/N] was nervous for some reason, she couldn't look at her. Nat was already drowning in conclusion. Maybe she knew about Nat's feelings toward her? Maybe that was her secret? Maybe Sam tried to convince her that rejecting someone wasn't that bad?

- Um... Natasha, do you want to... Just, please, don't laugh. Do you want to dance with me?

Romanoff was completely shocked. Like, shocked wasn't enough to express her emotions right now.

- I mean, if you don't want to it's fine...

- No. I'd love to - Natasha cut the girl off with the most serious, yet gentle voice anyone ever heard. [Y/N] looked at her with surprise written all over her face. - I'd love to dance with you, [Y/N] - she smiled slightly and gently grabbed her hands. Romanoff placed [Y/L/N]'s palms on her shoulders. Natasha herself gently and slowly pulled [Y/N] closer, her hands on the small of the girls back. They started to sway to the music. It was awkward as hell.

Natasha cleared her throat and [Y/N] looked at her, waiting for whatever Romanoff wanted to say. 'Now or never' Nat thought to herself. She leaned closer, her lips just right next to [Y/N]'s ear.

- Do you want to go out with me sometimes? - Nat whispered, not daring to look straight at the girl.

- I'd love to.

Romanoff smiled widely and rested her forehead on [Y/N]'s shoulder. The girl pulled her closer and hugged her tightly. In that moment they both were the happiest girls in the room.

- Hey, man. Look - Sam whispered to Clint, pointing at Nat and [Y/N]. They were dancing, Romanoff leaned and said something to the girl. Suddenly she lit up like a Christmas tree, her smile wider than ever before.

- Finally - Barton sighed, rolling his eyes. He tried to look annoyed, but he was already texting his wife to told her literally everything.

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freetjuuh-with-the-imagines · 7 years

Text

Never Enough (College AU) part 2

Y/N Y/L/N is the most popular girl in school. Her life seems picture perfect and there is nothing she could want more. Or is there? And what role does the biggest nerd in school Bucky Barnes have in her life? Stay tuned and find out!

Wordcount: 2403

Pairing: Bucky x Reader

Warnings: None that I am aware of.

A/N: Sorry it took so long guys. I do not have any discipline at all and I’m lazy as fuck. My apologies.

It has been three weeks since the incident with Bucky and really nothing’s changed. You don’t bully him anymore but that’s about it.

After you had brought Bucky to the schools nurse you went back to the cafeteria where Pietro and Nat were waiting for you. As you stood in front of them, waiting for them to speak up first, you crossed your arms and a frown appeared on your face. After almost five minutes you realized that you would have to be the one to start the conversation and spoke up.

“What the hell is wrong with you two!?” At this both of them finally looked up at you.

“He was touching you! He had his fucking hands on your waist. I’m your boyfriend Y/N, I am supposed to scare other guys away.” Defended Pietro.

“First of all, yes he had his hands on my waist, but that was to prevent me from falli-“

“He was the one that made you fall in the first place!” Sad Natasha. You gave her a stern look that silenced her.

“Accidents happen. Where was I? Yes, and second of all: you are allowed to scare them off, not break every bone in their body for saving me from a nasty fall! And Natasha, I had expected a little more of you instead you just crouched next to his face and started to say these terrible things to him. Things that I don’t even say to my sister, and that should say a lot!” They both had seemed to lose their interest in you and instead focused on their shoes.

“You know what? I’m going home and let you think about this. You can talk to me again when you feel like apologizing to me and especially to Bucky!” After saying that you stormed off and took the bus home. That evening, much to your mothers dismay, Pietro stopped by to apologize and swore he’d done the same with Bucky. The next morning Natasha was there to pick you up and apologized too.

And right now you were sitting in your arts class. You sat down next to Wanda and flashed a smile at Bucky and Steve who were sitting in front of her. To this, you noticed, Steve shot Bucky a weird look, who just shrugged it off.

“Last week we talked about the new drawing projects that have to be made. I have already made the groups and e-mailed it to you. I want everyone’s drawing at the end of the month.” Our arts teacher said strictly. And again I regretted my decision to join arts class instead of Spanish. I might not like to learn another language but I can’t draw for shit. That was why I felt really lucky to have Steve in my group. The two others in our group were Bucky and Christine Everhart. After rearranging the whole class so that everyone sat with their group you were the first to say something.

“Could someone maybe fill me in on what the project is? I don’t recall ever having heard about it.”

“We have to make a drawing, painting or whatever the hell you prefer more of something pretty.” Answered Christine. You knit your eyebrows at her answer and look at Steve and Bucky. Bucky chuckles and Steve lets out a sigh.

“We do have to paint something that interests us, something that is worthy of a whole assignment about it because that’s also part of the project.” Steve explains.

“I can’t draw but how about we draw something like a beach sunset? Would that be okay with you, Steve?” Bucky suggested.

“I can work with that. Maybe it would be nice to have a someone in it too? Christine? Or Y/N maybe?” Your eyes widened and Christine’s face contoured in disgust.

“Oh my God, why would you think I would ever agree to that? Don’t you know how gross sand is? It’s like a huge cat litter.” Then Steve suggested that Christine writes the assignment, because she’s always been good at turning stories prettier than they are or just the way she likes them.

“I wouldn’t mind to pose. It will make me feel less useless as I don’t have any good qualities in the shape of art.” You suggest.

“Well the, that’s settled. I can take pictures to add to the assignment so we all have a part in the project, but when and where are we gonna be able to pull the whole girl in beautiful sunset drawing?” Bucky adds.

“My house is only a ten minute drive away from a beautiful, small beach. We could go there.” You used to visit the small beach a lot in the past few weeks and found the most beautiful sunsets there.

“Great! They predict good weather tomorrow. We should go then.” After Steve said this you all began to exchange phone numbers and the times you’d be off the next day. At the end of class everything was arranged.

And just like everything was planned, you were on the beach the next afternoon. The sun was already starting to set so Steve somehow clicked into this very professional mode and started to tell you what to do.

Just before you left the school you had changed into your favorite summer dress. A white, knee length dress covered in lace. After changing you and Steve got into Christine’s car and she drove to the beach. Bucky had the day off so he’d be joining you there.

It didn’t take Steve very long to find the right pose and place for you to be in. He made you sit on a big rock, that seemed to exist out of a couple of smaller rocks attached to each other, that lay in the water.

“Oh yeah, this is perfect! Keep staring into the distance and don’t move.” Steve ordered.

“Yes sir.” You mocked.

“What time is it?” You ask after what seems like an hour.

“You’ve only been sitting there for like fifteen minutes, y/n.” Sighs Steve and Christine lets out a giggle.

“Ugh! Posing sucks, people.” To this you hear a chuckle that definitely does not belong to either Steve or Christine. “Bucky! You’ve finally arrived.” You let out dramatically. You’re about to turn your head, but not without Steve noticing.

“Do. Not. Move.” He orders strictly. “Oh and Bucky, nice of you to have finally joined us.” This gut gets annoyingly serious when drawing.

“Guys.” Christine giggles. “He’s been standing there for over ten minutes, too awestruck to take his picture.”

“I am not!.” Bucky tries to defend himself, but it’s too late for that.

“You should see him, guys. His face is as red as a tomato right now!” Christine continues.

Steve chuckles and adds: “You’re lucky y/n isn’t allowed to turn around. Your crush is showing.”

“Steve… Hey! No pictures.”

“Please guys, tell me what’s happening!” you beg, afraid to move incase Steve starts lecturing you again.

“Don’t worry, y/n! I took a picture of Bucky’s tomato red face so I’ll show you when you’re done.” Christine cheers happily. To this you hear Bucky groan and Steve chuckle.

“Don’t you dare have fun there ‘mister serious while painting’ Hurry up so I can get off of this rock ‘cause my butt is starting to ache.:

About an hour later Steve finally gave you his permission to move again. You didn’t even get the chance to drink some water from your bottle because Christine shoves her phone into your face. Kind of forcefully actually.

“This is what you just missed out on.” She grins as she waits for you to take her phone. The picture showing on the screen is indeed one of Bucky, with a very red face. You had to admit, he looked very cute all flustered.

No! What are you thinking? You have a boyfriend for god’s sake!

When you look up, you see that Bucky has disappeared from the spot he was just sitting. You give your two classmates a questioning look.

“He just stormed off.” Steve answers your not yet asked question with a nod into the direction Bucky apparently went to. And as you followed that direction you could indeed see Buck sitting somewhere further on the beach. Christine takes her phone out of your hands and you start to walk towards your moping team member.

“Hey, Buck.” You say as you plop down next to him in the sand. The only response you get is something that sounds like a sad hum. “What has gotten you so grumpy?”

After a while of silence you bump your shoulder into his, what causes him to look at you. “C’mon Bucky. Talk to me.” You beg.

“There’s sand stuck in between the plates of my metal am.” He pouts. You can’t help but chuckle as you watch him defeatedly looking at his bionic arm.

“And it has nothing to do with the picture that Christine took?” And you were met by silence once again. “Just so you know, I think you look very cure al flustered.” You wink at him in an attempt to dissolve the tension which Bucky seems to notice right away.

“Don’t you have a boyfriend?” He asks with a raised eyebrow. You give him a small smile.

“Yes, I do. But what he doesn’t know won’t harm him and it’s not as if I’m cheating. I just called you cute, there’s no harm n that.”

The two of you just sit there in silence for a while. You notice Bucky’s mouth open and lose a couple of times, as if he wants to say something but isn’t really sure about it.

“What’s going on in that head of yours? If you have something to say or to ask, just let it all out.”

“I have a question, but you have tom promise me that you won’t get angry.” He murmurs.

“Ok, on one condition.” You say, to which Bucky raises his eyebrows. “I get to ask you two questions.”

Bucky chuckles and agrees. It goes silent again for a while so you take your time to take in your surroundings. The sun is almost gone, only leaving a slim orange line of light in its wake. Turning your head to the other side of the sky, you can see the full moon already shining brightly. Around it the dark sky is decorated with stars of all sizes.

To you this could be a romantic evening if you were here with Pietro, but sadly your boyfriend isn’t very romantic. Not at all actually. Not that you were longing for always being super romantic an cheesy, but once in a while you would like a little bit of romance. You are pulled out of your thoughts when Bucky suddenly speaks up.

“Why are you always such a bitch?” Auch. That hurt. You know it’s the truth but that doesn’t make it less painful. “Don’t forget that you promised me that you wouldn’t get angry.” Bucky defends himself quickly.

“Nah, that’s ok. You’re right anyway. I’ve been a huge bitch to everyone except for my friends. I guess it’s because everyone is nice to me ‘cause they’re afraid of me. At home, the only one that is nice to me is my dad, who is always away on business trips. Besides him I have my older sister who despises me and my mother, who obviously loves my sister a lot more than me. I’m a disappointment to her and I guess I’ve been taking all of that out on everyone in school.” You sigh. Bucky takes his time to process all that you had just revealed to him.

“Wow. I really thought that you had it all, you know? A big house, rich parents, a pretty face, popularity and a lot of good friends. I guess there’s more to you than the eye sees.” Bucky says eventually.

“Well yeah, there’s not much I can do about it anymore.” You sigh.

“Yes, there is. You are doing something about it right now.” You give him a questioning look, not understanding it. “You are talking to me. And Steve. And you are being nice. If you try this with everyone they’ll like you a lot more.” He tells you as he puts a reassuring hand on your shoulder.

“Thanks Buck, I should definitely try that. But now it’s my turn.” You cheer as you mentally prepare yourself for the question you’re about to ask. “How did you get your metal arm?”

“I’ll tell you if you promise me to keep it a secret.”

You give him a reassuring smile. “I promise.” You say as you put your hand to your heart.

“Well, your friends might have some kind of bad influence on you, but some of mine were worse. But worst of all was Loki. Loki Laufeyson.” He takes a deep breath and then continues.

“At first he seemed harmless but after a while I got to get to know the real Loki. The one who always got in trouble, drank too much and smoked way too much seed. Somehow I ended up right in the middle of that word and one night, when we were both very drunk and high, we stepped into the car to drive for a bit. I can’t really remember much, but they told me that my arm was so severely damaged that there was no use in attempting to save it. And Loki, who was driving and got out of the accident with only a few scratches, was sentenced to jail. I was able to avoid that fate, but I did spend a little over a year into a rehabilitation clinic.”

Bucky takes a little break and just as I am about to ask, he already has his answer ready.

“I’ve always been good with mechanic stuff, so when I didn’t like the prosthetic arm they had given me, I invented my own. One that is definitely not sand proof yet.” You chuckled in amazement, not really knowing what to say.

“Wow Buck, tha- that’s really something. I don’t really know what to say. Who ese knows about this?”

“Only my parents and Steve so I’d really appreciate it if you’d keep this between us.”

“I’ll keep my promise and never tell anyone. So now my second question.” You smirk.

“Ask away.”

“Do you really have a crush on me?”

A/N: I really hope you liked it! Requests are open and if you want a part 3, let me know!

Taglist

@ailynalonso15 @barnes-and-noble-girl @buckybarnesbestbabe

#bucky x reader #bucky barnes x reader #bucky barnes fic #marvel fic #marvel imagine #bucky fic #bucky barnes imagine #bucky imagine #the winter soldier #the winter soldier imagine #james buchanan barnes #james buchanan barnes imagine

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