Girls and babies
Women before having a baby: Sees cute baby "aww this is the cutest baby ever!" Women after they have a baby: "Aww my baby is so cute!"
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When your phone is on full volume but you still check to see if somebody has messages you.
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I'd rather spend ten years looking for something than to ask my mum where it is and she finds it in ten seconds. I'd never hear the end of it.
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I hate it when a show gives you a recap after an ad break. I've been watching this show for half an hour already!
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If only supermarkets trusted you to bring back their trolleys after carrying your shopping home. My life would be complete.
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Was stroking my cat and she dribbled on my phone…bitch.
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The one with that pony movie.
Fat people aren’t fat. They’re horizontally tall 😛
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Fat people aren't fat. They're horizontally tall 😛
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When a girl says that she's fine, you'll never guess what it means. It means that she is fucking FINE!
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Bae asks you to do something and you either pretend you didn't hear him or that you are asleep.
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