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eliemo · 4 years

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Love Our Way

Summary: Virgil knew he should have said something right there. But he didn’t, because he knew that would be the end.

Notes: Ace Virgil fic with romantic LAMP

TWs: Mentions of sex but no details. A little bit of internalized acephobia but barely, Virgil just has negative self esteem.

They’d been together a few months now and it had been, without a doubt, the best few months of Virgil’s life.

It’d been a bit nerve wracking in the beginning, those first couple of weeks, as excited and thrilled as he was, Virgil had been extra paranoid about doing something wrong, about giving them any reason to lose feelings for him.

He honestly hadn’t thought it could work at first. Relationships rarely worked out with two people, let alone four. Eventually they would fight, or lose feelings, or decide it was all too complicated. And things would get awkward and they could all end up hating each other and who knew what it would do to Thomas if they could no longer stand to be in the same room—

But they didn’t. By some miracle, that never happened.

Things were...things were perfect, as scared as Virgil had been to use the word. They’d been amazing ever since the anxious side was allowed to join their family, the love and warmth a wonderful kind of overwhelming he’d never felt before, but actually dating the people he loved more than anything, no longer needing to be afraid to express his feelings…

It was more than he’d ever thought he would get. More than he ever thought could be possible. Sometimes he still couldn’t believe it was real.

They fit together like puzzle pieces, making each other stronger, pushing each other to be better, gentle and encouraging, coexisting in peaceful harmony.

Virgil had never felt so welcomed, so surrounded by unconditional support and affection. They showed him just how much he had to offer. For the first time he’d actually felt like he wasn’t just a burden.

It was hard, especially when it took a while to convince himself that he wasn’t invited into the relationship out of convenience, but because they actually wanted him.

But they loved him. He knew that now. They all loved each other, flaws and all.

And, well...Virgil should have known it wouldn't last forever.

Not for him. Because...because that was just the way things were, wasn’t it? He’d made progress, he wasn’t the bad guy anymore, but he was still Anxiety. Things were just destined to go wrong.

He really hadn’t given a single thought. It never crossed his mind as something that could ever be a problem, even when they had initially gotten together. No one else seemed intent on bringing it up, so Virgil had figured they never would.

But then it had. Logan had brought the topic up about a week ago, somewhat awkward but still painfully casual, the conversation simply to discuss everyone’s level of comfort when it came to intimacy.

Which...yeah, Virgil guessed it made sense. They were dating, the four of them happy and comfortable with their relationship, and had been for months now. So obviously sex was going to get brought up eventually. Boundaries needed to be set before...anything actually happened. It was routine for a healthy relationship.

Except Virgil hadn’t actually thought they would ever talk about it. Because he’d known for a long time that he was asexual and he’d just...kind of assumed the others were too.

Which in retrospect, was a stupid conclusion to jump to.

Virgil had known for years now, long before befriending the others. It had taken him a while to be sure, lots of research and panic and overthinking, but he’d eventually grown comfortable with the label. It was just another part of who he was.

But he’d also never really understood why. Thomas wasn’t asexual so it didn’t make any sense for Virgil to have a separate identity.

Unless it was just something all the sides experienced, none of them able to feel that kind of attraction.

But he’d never actually gotten around to asking. No one brought it up, and before the...development in their relationship it never seemed like something that would be an issue. So he’d just assumed, and ran with it.

But clearly that wasn’t the case. Not when Roman and Patton were responding to Logan’s question with varying levels of eagerness and approval, comfortable and willing to take the next step when they were all ready.

And Virgil knew he should have said something right there. They had given him the perfect opportunity to come out, quick and easy, and avoid anything uncomfortable in the future.

But he didn’t. Because...because that would be the end, wouldn’t it?

They would be sweet about it, of course. Thank him for being honest. But if he was the only one who didn’t want that...well, what was the point of him being a part of things?

It was a cruel thing to assume, he knew that. None of them were shallow enough to see sex as something necessary, and he knew they would never force him into anything.

But...but he already offered so little. They already had to jump through so many hoops to accommodate his anxiety, and it wasn’t like he was particularly loving or good at romance, as hard as he tried. As loving and amazing as they were, this could simply be the final straw.

He wanted to be with them. He wanted them in every other way. He loved them more than anything. But he wouldn’t fight it when they ended up distancing themselves from him.

Virgil just wasn’t ready for that heartbreak yet. So he plastered on a fake smile, and nodded along with the others.

He’d tell them tomorrow. The longer he waited, the worse it would be.

“Movie night!” Patton declared, skipping into the living room where Virgil was scrolling aimlessly on his phone. “And don’t think you’re getting out of it this time, Virge!”

Virgil tried to ignore the way his stomach twisted at the phrasing, swallowing against rising panic and sending Patton a smile. It was just movie night, same as every Friday.

It had been two weeks now, and he still hadn’t told them. He’d managed to avoid last week’s movie night with the excuse of an upset stomach, desperately trying not to think about what they could be doing without him.

And now...now he’d have to tell. They’d already be upset he waited this long, he couldn’t put it off any longer.

Besides, they’d all be in the same bed all night, as they often were, relaxed and happy and enjoying each other’s company. They wouldn’t ever force him into something he wasn’t comfortable with, even if they wanted nothing to do with him after he came out.

He’d lied, after all. He should have told them right away.

“I'll be right there,” he said, forcing a smile as Patton made his way upstairs to his bedroom where the others were likely waiting. “Just...give me a second.”

This was it, then. Hopefully afterwards, it wouldn’t be too awkward. Hopefully they would still be willing to keep him around as a friend.

They were all waiting for him by the time he made it to Roman’s room, the three of them sprawled out on the bed in a pile of laughs and smiles, and Virgil’s heart felt like it was trying to break through his chest.

He loved them so much. He wanted nothing more than to forget all of this and be held in their arms, content and warm until the sun came up.

But putting it off wasn’t fair to them. And it wasn’t fair to him either.

“Virgil!” Roman exclaimed, and Virgil felt lightheaded at the fond, excited looks he was being given. “Come help us choose a movie!”

He almost chickened out again, just for a second. But he couldn’t panic. Not until it was out in the open and he could deal with the consequences.

After tonight, he could very well end up alone again. Isolated like a villain.

Why did he have to keep turning out to be different? Why was he always meant to end up alone?

“In a second,” he said, stopping just inside the doorway. “I...I need to say something first, if that’s ok.”

Their smiles dropped slightly, but their gentle, welcoming expressions never wavered. The three of them sat up in bed, scooting forward as Patton nodded.

“Of course, honey,” he said. “What’s on your mind?”

He was actually doing this. He just...had to figure out how to start.

Virgil took a breath and stuffed his hands in his pockets to hide how they’d begun to shake. “Just to- just to get it out there to make it easier for you guys...I- I get it if you want to break up with me after this.”

That got their attention, their heads snapping up with wide, wary eyes. Virgil couldn’t quite bring himself to look at them anymore.

“I’m just saying,” he muttered, and god he was shaking so bad. “I’ll understand.”

The silence only stretched on another few seconds before Logan cleared his throat. “We’re listening, Virgil.”

Ok. Ok he could do this. He...really should have planned out what he was going to say first.

“I should have told you right away,” he started. “I know I should have. It’s not fair to you guys and I’m...I’m really sorry that I didn’t. I wasn’t trying to...to lie or- or lead you on or anything, I just...love you guys. A lot. I’ve loved being with you and I wasn’t ready to...you know...ruin that.”

“Virge? What...what did you do, darling?”

It was passed off as a joke, the Prince forcing a small smile, but there was serious concern behind it.

Virgil quickly shook his head. “It’s not...I didn’t realize that it would be, you know, an issue. But you guys want...you want someone who’s not...me. Because- because I’m…”

Say it, just say it.

“I’m asexual. And you guys...I shouldn’t have kept that from you. I’m sorry. I’m just...sorry. I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.”

And that was...it. That was it. They knew now.

They knew, and they could react how they wanted. If they were angry, Virgil wouldn’t blame him. If they were disgusted and demanded he leave...Virgil wouldn’t fight it, no matter how badly it hurt.

He knew them better than to truly assume that would be the case, but the thought was still there.

Furious or not, there was no way they’d trust him enough to keep him in the relationship.

But he had to hold it together until the end of the conversation. He’d escape as soon as they let him, and then...and then he’d readjust to being alone.

Unfortunately, none of them seemed particularly inclined to answer, the silence stretching on a moment too long. He risked a glance up from the floor, hunching his shoulders when he caught Logan’s eye.

“Virgil,” the logical side said. “Come sit down, please.”

He quickly shook his head, taking a step back. He didn’t need a long, drawn out ending to this. He wouldn’t be able to hold it together that long.

“You...you guys don’t have to--”

“Virgil,” Patton cut him off, scooting aside to make room. “Come over here and talk to us.”

And he’d never be able to deny Patton anything, would he? Not when he sounded so desperate.

Virgil moved forward on shaky legs, focusing solely on his breathing to keep himself from crying, ending up seated in between Patton and Logan, Roman pressed up against the moral side.

“This doesn’t need to be a conversation,” he said, just wanting to get out. “I...I said I would understand.”

Virgil jumped when there was a hand against his cheek, Logan suddenly cupping his jaw and turning his head until they were face to face, the logical side’s eyes piercing behind his glasses.

“Virgil,” Logan started, sounding almost breathless. “How...on earth could you think this would end in a break up?”

Virgil blinked, wondering if this was some kind of trick question. “What? I don’t--”

“Darling,” Roman said, and the Prince was suddenly scooting over to sit in front of Virgil, the three of them surrounding him. “You thought we would leave if you came out as Ace?”

Virgil shook his head because no, that...that wasn’t the problem. Not entirely, anyway. “It’s not...guys I lied. You asked me to be in a relationship with you and I didn’t say anything.”

“You did not lie,” Logan said, never dropping his hand from Virgil’s face. “You just were not ready to come out yet. You and I both know there is a substantial difference.”

There was a hand suddenly slipping into his own, and Virgil startled when he realized it was Patton’s, the moral side’s free hand now running fingers through his hair.

“You weren’t comfortable sharing that part of yourself,” he said. “That’s totally ok, sweetheart. No one’s mad at you. I’m just glad you said something before something...happened.”

Logan’s hand suddenly dropped, his eyes big and painfully worried, and Virgil had to force himself not to look away.

“Virgil,” he said slowly. “You do not...owe us anything. Especially not something like sex. If we made you feel like--”

“What? Jesus- no.” Virgil moved his hand away from Patton, pulling his knees up to his chest, squeezing his eyes shut to try to get a hold of himself. “It wasn’t...I just thought...it would be too...t-too much to deal with, you know?”

They weren’t breaking up with him. They weren’t. He’d been stupid to think that. There was no reason he should still be so upset.

He couldn’t make them feel guilty. He couldn’t make them think they’d been the ones to do something wrong when they’d been nothing but perfect. He couldn’t--

“Oh Virgil.”

Too late he realized the tears had started to spill over, his face burning as he pressed a hand against his mouth to try and muffle any treacherous sobs.

There was a pair of arms around him, warm and grounding, and it took Virgil a moment to realize it was Roman, gently guiding him into the embrace. He didn’t fight it, falling limp against the Prince’s chest with a pathetic choking noise.

“S-sorry,” he managed in between sobs. “I’m sorry, I- I don’t know why I’m...I sh-should have told you, I- I thought you’d...I thought you’d run out of reasons to- to want me.”

“We could never,” Roman whispered, holding him tight. Patton moved forward to rub circles along his back, Logan reaching out to squeeze his hand. “You’re beautiful, Virgil. And this doesn’t change a thing.”

It didn’t make sense. None of it made any sense. If one of them had come out, it would be different. But with him...there was already so much to deal with, so much they were forced to handle.

Eventually, it had to get to be too much, right? He’d already figured they’d get fed up with the extra steps they had to take to respect his boundaries, Virgil always a little more wary when it came to being vulnerable.

But they all sounded so...genuine. Princey hadn’t once loosened his hold, still whispering quiet reassurances, Patton was back to running his fingers through Virgil’s hair, pressing kisses to his free hand.

And Logan still held on tight, counting out familiar breathing exercises just loud enough for Virgil to hear, always knowing how to calm him down.

When he finally managed to calm down, taking in deep, shuddering breaths, he reluctantly pulled away from Roman, wiping at his eyes as he stared down at his lap.

“Sorry,” he muttered. “I never thought...I wouldn’t have let you guys do anything. I was always gonna tell you eventually I just...kept putting it off.”

“That is quite alright,” Logan said, sounding oddly hesitant. “But I...don’t think I could forgive myself if we had taken the next step without realizing you would not enjoy it.”

Virgil nodded, forcefully pushing down the sickening panic at the thought. “I know. I wouldn’t have let that happen. I promise.”

Patton and Logan both squeezed his hands, Patton tilting forward to press a kiss to his temple before leaning his forehead on Virgil’s shoulder. He allowed himself to lean into the touch, taking another shaky breath before continuing.

“I’m...I am sorry though. If this complicates things.”

Roman cocked his head slightly, frowning. “Complicates things?”

“Yeah,” Virgil said, hoping he wasn’t about to refute every wonderful thing that had just been said. “We’re...in a relationship. And you all want...I mean, Roman you’re pretty much all romance, so I know you want--”

He cut himself off, caught completely off guard when Roman started laughing.

“Sorry,” the Prince said quickly, smiling at the exasperated looks Virgil realized the others were giving him. “Sorry, I just...gosh, Virgil can I kiss you?”

Virgil blinked, mind suddenly completely blank. “I...uh, sure?”

True to his word, Roman was suddenly cupping Virgil’s face in both his hands, gently pressing their lips together, and just like always Virgil melted against the touch, completely safe for just a single, blissful moment.

When Roman pulled back, he met Virgil’s gaze, brimming with nothing but adoration and love. “Virgil, darling, you really think I see something as trivial as sex romantic?”

“I mean...yeah?”

“Virgil, I love you. You, not...not what you have to offer. I love seeing you in the mornings, and holding you...I love hearing your voice. I want to cook you dinners and pick you flowers and sing for you. That’s romantic, Virge. Not...not something as small as sex. That’s not what’s important. Not to me.”

“I, for once, am in agreement with Roman,” Logan said. “Sexual intimacy has never been of importance to me. It certainly does not hold enough power to damage our relationship in any way if you do not desire it. And it certainly has no power over my feelings for you.”

Virgil was suddenly dangerously close to crying again. “I--”

“Besides, there is no logical reason for us to engage in sexual intercourse. We are not human, so the need to reproduce does not--”

Roman thankfully cut him off with a kiss, Logan making a noise somewhere between surprise and annoyance, but reciprocated without further complaint.

Patton was suddenly taking both of Virgil’s hands, their fingers laced together, and Virgil suddenly wasn't quite so scared to meet the moral side’s eyes.

“I don’t care about something silly like that,” Patton said. “I just care about you, honey. The four of us being safe and happy and together. If we all just cuddle and tell each other how much we love each other...nothing else could ever make me that happy. So don’t you worry about a thing, ok?”

Virgil wasn’t sure whether he laughed or sobbed, but he was smiling back at Patton, at the people who surrounded him with unconditional love, and he nodded.

“Ok,” he agreed, feeling lighter than he thought he ever had. “Thank you. All of you. I...I love you all. So much.”

Within moments they were all tangled up in each other, the television playing an old comfort movie, Virgil wrapped up in Logan’s arms with his head against Roman’s chest, Patton leaned against his legs.

It was still perfect, and Virgil had a funny feeling it always would be. He loved them, more than anything in the entire world, and there wasn’t a doubt in his mind they felt the same way.

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bts-weverse-trans · 4 years

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201123 Weverse Magazine 'BE' Comeback Interview - Jimin

Jimin: “I’m the kind of person who likes to be loved” BTS BE comeback interview 2020.11.23

When he’s talking, Jimin often starts his sentence with phrases like, “I just,” “it just,” “they just …” But then he immediately goes on to open up about his feelings, always providing a sincere response.

On one V-LIVE session back in October, you wore the clothes that you had planned to wear at the airport if you were to go on tour. Jimin: I hadn’t really noticed, but I think I’ve finally come to terms with the reality of our present situation.

By “situation,” you mean how it’s difficult to meet your fans in person? Jimin: Yes. If we had to go on stage in this situation, or if we had to perform our songs, I’m not sure how we would go about accomplishing that. At the same time, It felt like something that was closed up and blocked was opened up again. There isn’t the kind of excitement we got from tour season, though, so it’s easy to feel worn out. But, just like when we’re making new songs, I try to do whatever I can.

BE feels like it’s all about taking care of your feelings and the process of moving forward. Jimin: I had the role of listening to what the members wanted to include in the album, but it’s more a record of the present than it is about our individual feelings. We talked openly about how we’re having a hard time and how we’re trying our best to get over things, and that became the album.

As the project manager for BE, how did you go about gathering and organizing all the members’ ideas? Jimin: I became the project manager because Yoongi recommended I do it, but I didn’t think I had to lead anything along, more just make sure the other members could do their work quickly and easily. Usually that meant asking about their opinions, or passing opinions back and forth with our company. So I would collect ideas, organize them, say, “These are some of the ideas we got back. What do you think?”—ask them again, if they said okay, pass it on to the company, and if they made a song, I sent that over, too.

How did you prod along the members who were taking too long with their ideas? (laughs) Jimin: I would mention them by name in our group chat, and that got them to reply. (laughs) Any time I said someone or other didn’t submit their idea yet, all the others would chime in with, “Hurry up, guys!” and then they’d give it to me.

Sounds like it’s great for one of the members to be project manager. (laughs) How did you accommodate all the different ideas? Jimin: When we first started, we sat down for about an hour and said: If you feel downtrodden, just make a song about feeling desperate; if you want to give others hope, go ahead and write a hopeful song. Let’s find the topic and work from there. And since there’s seven of us, and the album’s going to be about current events, let’s put in one skit to make seven songs; and let’s not put in any solo songs. Let’s make something that we can all work on together.

That approach must have been different from the way you worked on your other recent albums. Jimin: We never said anything like, somebody will make this song and someone else will make that song. We would just take a song and say, Who wants to do this? Who wants to do that? I became more ambitious, and wanted the other members to recognize the work I was doing. And because it was so fun working together, any time I made something, I wanted to play it for them right away. I also loved when they gave me compliments, so that added to the fun. When the songs are eventually finished, we hoped the fans would be able to pick up on all those emotions exactly as we felt them, although there are some songs that didn’t make the cut. (laughs) It was really fun.

You could say that, while it’s important to deliver songs to the fans, the process of creation itself is also important. Jimin: A little while ago, I learned something new about myself: I’m the kind of person who likes to be loved. Looking back, I realized I do what I do not just for the work itself, but to be loved by my friends, family, the group, and fans. It’s been really hard to hold onto those connections, but I felt a fullness once I was sure of that love and kept those relationships close. It was like getting something of my own.

Rather than simply being loved, is it actually a satisfaction arising from the effort involved and the deep sense of trust it builds? Jimin: I used to think more frequently about what I was getting from them than what I was doing for everyone else. Even if I don’t strictly owe our fans or group members anything in return, I feel a deep and sincere appreciation for all the things they do for me. I also saw some people for who they really are, some people who don’t really care about me. Rather than pushing those people away, I learned how to react less emotionally to them. Likewise, I was able to be more emotionally honest with people who are very considerate toward me.

It’s become difficult to express those kinds of feelings to fans these days. The only choice, really, is to talk to them through your songs. What is your message this time? Jimin: There’s a message in every album and music video we make; but you don’t have to understand the message, I just hope you enjoy listening and watching. That’s the first thing. I hope you really like the songs and videos I created while working to not become complacent, so I took great care and practiced a lot to present something perfect to you.

On that note, I think your singing and dancing are changing quite a bit. Your performances in “Black Swan” and “Dynamite” are completely different, but perhaps because of your changed body silhouette, the feel of your dance has become more consistent. As a dancer, what is it you want to express? Jimin: I just hope my emotions come across. I just want the emotions I put into my dancing, actions, and singing to be felt. So I got a lot of feedback, asked around, did some research and found that for each emotion you might express on stage, there’s a body most appropriate for the job. We all have different body types. In order to get the body that can best express my emotions at my age, I went on a strict diet, but I don’t stick to it nearly as intensely as I used to. (laughs)

If you watch your dance in “Dynamite,” your body, especially when you turn away, looks different from before. You look lighter. What effect did your new body have on your dance moves? Jimin: I look how I want to look when I’m around 58 kg, so I went on a diet and lost 5 kg. That’s when I found the look I wanted to present to everyone. I can’t be objective about myself, but there was a certain vibe that I wanted. In the past I tried really hard to be no-frills, and by focusing less on trying something new and more on avoiding mistakes, I prevented myself from advancing any further. But in “Dynamite,” I tried out expressions I’d never tried before. I wanted people to be able to tell that I was really concentrating on this when they watched the video, so for this song, I tried to be sentimental and—how should I put this—I even tried to look suave (laughs) and funny, too . I ended up focusing on painting a single picture rather than on each of the individual elements.

And what is it you wanted to show off? Jimin: We haven’t been able to put on a real show during COVID-19. I wanted to show that we didn’t waste all that time but rather have kept going through it all, that we keep working hard. But portraying “working hard” through dance would look really tiring, so I smiled and danced throughout filming “Dynamite.”

How was that possible? It couldn’t have been easy to keep the whole team motivated. Jimin: With the spread of COVID-19, it took us a while to really believe our rise to the top of the Billboard Hot 100. When we checked our phones and it said we got first place we were amazed, but it was hard to believe, although we were all crying. (laughs) But when COVID-19 first hit, we said, “Ah, it’ll pass quickly and we’ll be right back on tour.” The reason was that we had said, even if it gets tough, let’s give it our all for the next year. Give it our all and collapse.. That was the plan, but we were really disappointed. What was worse was, when I heard it would be hard to have any performances this year, my head … it sort of went blank. My mind was empty. We couldn’t just take a break either. Other people had it really hard but we could keep working. I didn’t know whether we should be happy or sad about it. There were no answers for anything. It was really tough.

How did you get over that? Jimin: If an interviewer or anyone else asked me what my goal was, I told them my goal is to perform with the members for a long time, and that is probably my biggest goal; but I was really saying that to the group: I want to be with you guys for a really long time. I think we conveyed that feeling well to one another. I seriously worried a lot that the group would get exhausted. But they’d be laughing with one another, cheering each other up. We had a lot more time to chat together, so whatever was going on, we could always talk about it over a drink at our home and work it out.

What makes you take your work so seriously? Jimin: I really want to love this job inside and out. If we just look at work as work, all we’ll be after is money, but I never once thought that our group’s dynamic, or the relationship we have with our fans, was based on that. But I think if you’re exhausted mentally and physically, the work becomes a chore, and then your relationships will inevitably suffer. That’s what I was afraid of.

The song “Dis-ease” is about how each member feels about working. How do you feel about your work? Jimin: I don’t consider my main profession, performing and singing, “going to work.”. But when I’m doing something else with the camera right in front of me,that feels like “work.” Singing and performing for our fans isn’t work—it’s something I really, really want to do.

You helped write “Dis-ease,” correct? Jimin: The bridge. I was recording with Pdogg and there was one part that didn’t have a melody, so—should I call it improv?—I was just singing something without thinking about it, and then he asked me to sing that again. So I asked if he was sure, and then he asked me to write the melody, so I ended up writing it.

Some of the other songs on BE have something like that too, but “Dis-ease” somehow feels particularly like old school Korean hip hop. Jimin: I thought so too. I thought of 20 years ago when I sang it. The majority of the song was written by j-hope, so that might just be my thinking (laughs) but I sang it when there was a question mark on who would sing the vocals. I was really doing whatever I wanted, so I sort of had to be restrained (laughs) but it was fun.

Was there any place the vocals changed while recording? There are a lot of parts on BE where you use almost a normal speaking voice. Jimin: I usually already have the big picture set in my mind when I sing, but this time it wasn’t like that. “Life Goes On,” especially—that song’s not about me, but I couldn’t help but empathize with it, so right from the beginning I performed it without having to think about how my voice should sound. I wasn’t thinking about some particular emotion of mine I wanted to express to you. I just recorded exactly the feelings I had as I sang.

There’s a song titled, “Telepathy.” When you streamed yourselves in production on YouTube, the group mentioned the idea of telepathy which made me think you were sending the song directly to your fans. If you could talk to them through telepathy, what would you say? Jimin: People have kind hearts, and I just hope they don’t let that go. You asked about telepathy, but I think we really do have a telepathic connection with our fans. It’s not crystal clear or anything, but I think if we’re sincere then they can feel it somehow. I think that’s why our fans support us and are always by our side.

And what about the other way around? What would you like to hear from your fans? Jimin: One thing I’m always curious about, about our fans, is what’s the hardest thing in their lives. What each of them is struggling with, what’s making them happy—I’m really curious to know. We face our own difficulties as well, so I always wonder if there’s someone in each of our fans’ lives to ask them if they’re doing okay. I hope things get better soon, that people can keep holding on, and that the adults will follow all the rules. Kids don’t have a lot of options right now to do the things they want to do. I imagine a lot of kids see this as something that’s being forced upon them by adults, so I hope the grown-ups will properly explain the situation to the kids so they can help each other too, to end the pandemic.

The news is saying that they’ve made a COVID-19 vaccine, so you might be able to meet your fans sooner than later. What are you going to say to them when you finally see them again? Jimin: I don’t think we’ll say anything. I think we’ll just look at each other for a very long time. And if I’m able to say anything, I’ll probably say, “You made it. Now let’s get back to having a good time.”

Trans © Weverse

#bangtan #jimin #be album #weverse #comeback interview #weverse magazine #201123 #2020

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kiarcheo · 3 years

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Omne Trium Perfectum

The Clarrward fic I promised @pikapals16.

Arranged Marriage AU, set in an imaginary past and world where women can rule and homophobia is not a thing but arranged marriages are.

Can read it on ao3

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‘Cheer up, lass, you will want for nothing.’

It takes all the etiquette training she had ever gone through to stop her from rolling her eyes at her chaperon’s words. She knows he means well, but he is just telling her what she already knows. What is pretty much the only thing she knows. Or that she has been promised, at least. That her future spouse is abundantly wealthy. Enough to make the arranged marriage seem like a pondered, planned and advantageous choice for her family rather than what actually is. She has no misconceptions. She is on her way to a foreign land to marry someone she has never heard of before because her family hopes that over there the echoes of her....missteps will have not been heard. If you can call trusting the wrong guy a misstep. She protected her virtue, she is not an idiot. Even when she expected to marry him, she still would not give in, no matter how much he pleaded and asked and cajoled. And she has never been happier considering how it ended. But apparently nobody cared for that. Nor that she had been unaware and completely foreign to his actions. She had been his intended for years, everyone knew that, and that simple fact was enough to ruin her and her reputation.

So her family, the very same people who had chosen him for her in the first place, are now acting as if it is her fault that Thomas revealed himself to be a sorry excuse for a human being, and as if she should be grateful that they managed to find her a spouse despite everything. All the while not so subtly implying that she better not mess up this opportunity too...because they have no intention of taking her back.

And that’s how Catherine Parr finds herself travelling across nations to marry the head of the House of La Marck.

Why someone who holds three duchies and two counties needed to look so far away to find someone to marry, a complete stranger who will bring no lands, no political power, and no exceptional dowry is beyond her comprehension.

Age, looks, health, they all count nothing compared to power and money. Not matter how ugly, stupid, old or sick...if someone is wealthy enough, or powerful enough, there will always be someone willing to marry them. So why could they not find a single willing woman in the vast lands under their control? Or even nearby?

Did they look for someone who would have no knowledge of what she was getting into? For someone who would be so far removed from their homeland and family that she would have no way to escape?

Nobody will ever accuse her of lacking imagination...and none of the answers Catherine comes up with are comforting.

But then she arrives at what is going to be her new home, at least according to her chaperon. The same man who seems to decide that it might be important to let her know that her spouse is going to be a woman before leaving her in the hands of a welcoming committee that does not include her future wife…and...everything is nice.

The palace is impressive but not intimidating, and she looks forward to the tour promised by Lady Joan, who had introduced herself as the one in charge of her personal attendants. She is informed that her name is Jane but to distinguish her from another Lady Jane, who is momentarily absent, and apparently higher in ranks, she is known as Joan.

From Lady Joan to Lady Elizabeth, who fills the same position but for her spouse, to every staff member she encounters, they all seem nice. They greet her cordially, spare her too long introductions in favour of leading her to her chambers. Leave her food so that she can rest and eat when she feels like it, rather than having to put up appearances.

And yet, there is something....off. They are all pleasant and kind, but they all look at her with something akin pity.

Which she doesn’t get.

At first she thinks it’s because she looks dreadful, exhausted from the long trip.

But it doesn’t change once she is fully rested and she makes herself presentable. No, not just presentable, but putting extra effort to impress, both the household and her betrothed.

Then she wonders if perhaps it’s because of the situation she finds herself in, but all the staff has nothing but good things to say about her fiancée. Just like they seem to enjoy working at the palace. And she thinks it is genuine.

Her interactions with her future wife are sporadic and impersonal, but always cordial. Just like the first time they had met, the duchess nothing like she had expected.

‘Lady Catherine,’ the woman had bowed her head shallowly, ‘I hope you found your accommodation to your satisfaction.’

‘I did, Your Grace,’ Catherine had curtsied, ‘thank you very much. Lady Joan has been most helpful, just like everyone else.’

‘I’m pleased,’ the duchess had nodded in appreciation towards the attendants, ‘let her know if you need anything. Or anyone else. We will do our best to make you feel at home.’

Then she had swept out of the room.

She had been utterly polite the next few times they had met. Even going as far as graciously telling her she could call her Anna if she wished so, forgoing formalities. Not that she had many chances so far. Catherine imagines she is very busy. The alternative is that Anna is going out of her way to avoid her.

Still, there is nothing alarming or worryingly. She isn’t sure if she should trust her gut feelings and her reading people skills, considering how they failed her for years, leaving her blind to who Thomas really was. So she wonders if she is wrong. Maybe they are not pitying her. Perhaps they just...know things she doesn’t. Easy since she just arrived, with barely a clue about the new life she was getting into.

She certainly feels her inexperience days later, when the palace seems to be buzzing and she has no idea why. Nor she has any idea who the young woman at the center of the activities is. Or why everyone seems to be waiting on her words. Even Lady Elizabeth seems to defer to her.

She has barely asked Lady Joan if she could make the introductions when she is spotted. Everyone seems to move aside, letting the lady approach her, an older woman at her side.

‘Lady Parr, it’s a pleasure to meet you,’ she curtsies, ‘this is Lady Jane Rochford,’ she motions to her companion, ‘and I’m Katherine Howard. I hope your stay has been pleasant so far.’

Catherine curtsies back, suddenly aware that everyone’s attention is on her. She keeps feeling eyes on her as they exchange pleasantries. It doesn’t feel malicious, like they are waiting for a misstep, but rather out of curiosity...and she is curious herself, as well as confused. Why the interest? Lady Howard had said similar things to those her fiancée did...albeit the interaction had been much warmer and longer, the young woman enquiring about her trip as well as how she is enjoying her new home and whether there is anything they could do to make the transition easier.

She soon starts to understand. Because Anna might be the head of the house, but it is Katherine who runs it. It sort of makes sense. Anna has political responsibilities as well as administrative ones for five different territories, it is not surprising that she doesn’t have the time or desire to be bogged down in running the household. And Catherine certainly doesn’t resent that she had chosen Katherine to do so, not when it clearly had been going since long before she appeared on the scene, and Katherine had been doing an excellent job at it.

As she liaises with her to organise the wedding, her future bride apparently completely disinterested in the matter, she can see why everyone looks up to Katherine, and she dares say, even loves her. Spending so much time together, especially compared to the amount of time she spends with Anna (who, however, seems to be around much more often, if the glimpses she catches are any indication), it comes to no surprise that she is closer to Katherine than to the woman she is going to marry.

Perhaps that’s why on a wedding day that sees none of the brides happy, what hurts Catherine the most is how utterly sad Katherine looks, despite her best efforts to hide it.

She only has to wait until the next day to find out the reason.

Whenever Catherine had thought about her wedding night, whether with Thomas, with a mystery spouse when she didn’t know about the identity of the new match arranged by her family, and then with Anna, she had a lot of mixed feelings. Anxiety. Anticipation. Dread. Curiosity. Nerves. What she had never expected was that she would spend it completely alone, no trace of her new spouse.

The staff doesn’t seem surprised to see her leaving her rooms by herself...nor by her asking where her wife is, making it even more obvious she had not spent the night. She is grateful they don’t comment on it...and that they don’t direct her towards Anna’s chambers because she has no idea where they are exactly, besides in which wing of the palace they are in. Luckily she is much more familiar with the library location.

‘You were not in your chambers last night.’

‘You should not have been looking for me. Not on your wedding night.’

At least someone else seemed to share Catherine’s expectations.

‘Bessie told me you were crying.’

‘Bessie should mind her own business.’

‘Kat,’

Catherine had never heard her wife so gentle.

‘What?!’

Nor Katherine being less than gracious.

‘I’m sorry.’

Katherine lets out a heavy sigh. ‘Don’t apologise. I’m sorry for snapping at you. It is not your fault.’

‘I wish it could have been you.’

‘We always knew it was impossible…’ from her tone Catherine can imagine a bittersweet smile on Katherine’s face, ‘doesn’t hurt any less.’

‘I love you.’

‘I love you too.’

Catherine silently walks away. She can talk to her wife another time. She needs to process what she learned, anyway. She never had grand expectations of love from this marriage. Not with her family not even telling her whom she was going to marry, just sending her on her merry way to a foreign land to wed a complete stranger. Not after meeting Anna and being treated with polite, cool detachment.

Still, she surprises herself a bit when all she feels for Katherine is a new appreciation. She had been unfailingly courteous towards her. She went out of her way to make her feel at home, certainly more than her wife ever did. Not once she had betrayed her hurt or any kind of negative feelings towards Catherine for marrying the woman she loves.

Many things appear under a new light, giving Catherine a different understanding, from the way Katherine is in charge and treated as nothing less than the mistress of the house to why Anna keeps her distance, formal and aloof, seemingly completely disinterested in her.

Which is a far sight from the bad mood she seems to be few days later. When she cautiously enquiries where Katherine is, all she gets is a curt reply that she is away on business...it doesn’t feel her place to ask what kind of business or where, but it is evident to her the absence is the cause of Anna’s discontent.

Catherine resolves to steer clear from her wife, which is usually quite an easy feat. That’s why she starts to retrace her steps as she hears Anna’s terse ‘I’m sure that Lady Anne was only too willing.’

She is out of earshot when she stops. This is her house too now. If she wants to get a book from the library, she will. And if her wife has a problem with her entering a room she is in, she can vacate it herself. What she doesn’t expect approaching the library once again is to hear Katherine’s voice.

‘-with your wife.’

‘You did it on purpose.’ Anna’s statement sounds like an accusation.

‘I had some business to deal with,’ Katherine doesn’t come across as fazed, ‘but the timing was propitious, I admit. Giving you the time and space to get to know her.’

‘She is not you.’

‘And that’s not her fault,’ Katherine rebukes her, ‘Anna, you can’t punish her for that.’

‘I’m not.’

‘We both know that there are many ways to hurt someone-’

‘I’m nothing like-’

‘Of course not!’ Katherine interrupts her. ‘Of course not,’ she repeats softer, ‘have you at least talked to her? Explained the situation?’

‘And tell her what?’ Anna scoffs.

‘That she should feel free to find someone else too, for starters. It is unfair for you to enjoy...well, me, love, companionship, while condemning her to solitude because she thinks she owes you fidelity when you don’t give her the same. Catherine is smart. Caring. Beautiful. She will have no problems finding someone to appreciate her if you don't want to.’

‘Someone like you?’

‘Why not?’ Catherine barely suppresses a gasp because that is not what she expected Katherine to say. ‘If she’ll have me, of course.’

‘Where are you going?’ Anna calls after her. ‘Kat. Katherine. Lady Katherine!’

Katherine stops by the door, just in time for Catherine to slip into the adjacent room without being seen.

‘Be careful. One might think you’re calling for your wife.’

And with that parting shot, Katherine leaves.

Catherine tries to convince herself that Katherine had been joking. Or better, that she had talked like that just to needle Anna. But Katherine never makes her feel like she is spending time with her to spite Anna or to make her jealous. As a matter of fact, her wife is never discussed and most of their interactions seem to happen out of her sight, although she has no doubt that Anna knows they are taking place. So Catherine just tries to enjoy the very pleasant company and the warm feelings it brings her.

‘Lady Catherine, would you like to join me for a stroll in the gardens?’

‘What could I get you to make you call me Cathy?’ she asks putting down her book. She had obviously known about it before, but since overhearing Katherine’s comment, it has been on her mind, how there is no way to differentiate their names when spoken aloud.

‘What are you willing to offer?’ Katherine cheekily counters back. ‘Only if you call me Kat,’ she adds, taking pity on a flustered Cathy.

‘If you like this, I’m going to take you to another property, it has a path lined on both sides by cherry trees, and another with camellia. They are stunning when they are all flowering,’ Kat tells her as she looks in awe at the surrounding colourful scenery. ‘If you want, of course,’ she adds, sensing Cathy’s hesitation.

‘Just...I wouldn't want to upset Anna,’ Cathy is aware that the more time Kat spends with her, the less she spends with her wife.

‘She is welcome to join us if she wishes so,’ Kat doesn’t seem to see any issue. ‘Besides, it will be good for you to get an idea of what you are the lady of. I don’t want to presume anything, but personally I would be bored to death in your situation...so perhaps you would be interested in taking over some duties. Either from me or from-’

‘I don’t want to take anything away from you.’ Not anymore than she already did, Cathy thinks to herself.

‘What if I tell you that I would appreciate the help?’

‘Why are you being so nice to me?’ Cathy can’t stop herself from asking.

‘Why wouldn’t I be?’ Kat looks at her genuinely confused.

Cathy flounders.

‘I know how it is to be a girl in a foreign land, trying to find your place, barely knowing anybody, not even your spouse...not chosen nor liked.’

‘I like Anna.’ She doesn’t say it just because she is talking to her lover. Anna might be distant, but she has always been pleasant to her. And she has never seen nor heard of any ill-behaviour towards anyone else either.

‘She is very likeable, isn’t she?’ Kat smiles softly. ‘But it doesn’t mean it is an easy situation for you,’ she gives her an understanding look, ‘I know you are aware of me and Anna.’

Cathy gasps. She hadn’t realised Kat knew she knew. And she certainly didn’t expect her to broach the topic so openly.

‘You don’t seem to mind?’ for the first time Kat sounds hesitant.

‘I- it makes you two happy. And it doesn’t make me unhappy,’ Cathy tells her. Love would be ideal, but- ‘I count myself lucky for what I got.’

‘There you are!’ Anna sweeps into the library.

‘We have been going over the books.’ Kat had been showing Cathy the ropes.

Anna pointedly looks between the table where the accounting records are spread and the couch they are currently sitting on.

‘We are taking a break.’

‘You have been at it for ages, didn’t know we had so many books.’

Cathy dares say Anna sounds grumpy more than sarcastic.

‘If I am to seduce her, I will take my time,’ Cathy chokes on her own breath at Kat’s reply, ‘you should know better than to expect her to jump in my bed quickly. You should know better than to expect that from both of us.’

Anna merely grabs a nearby book and sits down next to Kat, huffing.

‘What can I do for you?’ Anna enquiries.

While they had been spending more time together, it had always been the three of them.

‘I was looking for Kat,’ Cathy admits. ‘She told me she would be unable to make our usual meeting, but I haven’t seen her at all since two days ago.’

‘She is away on business.’

‘What type of business?’ It comes out sharper than intended, but all Cathy can think is what could require staying overnight. ‘Where?’

‘You better not be implying what I think you’re implying.’ Anna’s reply is equally pointed. Then she peers at her wife curiously. ‘Are you jealous?’

Cathy doesn’t know what to say. It’s her wife. Asking if she is jealous of someone else. Who happens to be her wife’s lover.

Anna laughs, the lack of reply seemingly speaking for itself.

‘Proper business. She has a mind for it,’ she then graciously informs her. ‘Why do you think she runs the show around here?’

Cathy opens her mouth to answer before thinking better of it. She could be a lover without responsibilities. And she knows Kat doesn’t run just the household, but she also keeps an eye on other properties belonging to Anna too. She doesn’t know how she balances all she had shown her with other additional, apparently personal, businesses. But she understands even more why she was not upset about the idea of sharing some duties with Cathy.

‘I know I can’t compare to the one you’re wishing for,’ Cathy had not realised she was staring longingly out of the window until Anna’s voice brings her back to reality, ‘but would you like to go to the gardens with me?’

As they walk side by side, Cathy considers how, of all things, she had never expected to bond with her own wife over their shared fondness for another woman.

‘Speak true,’ Anna interrupts her musings, ‘you might have realised with Kat that I value honesty over politeness, especially when it’s fake.’

Yes. That should have been the first hint, how brazen and frank the younger woman was while talking to her wife, in a way no other at the palace would do, not even Bessie – Lady Elizabeth – whom Cathy had learned had been with Anna for a very long time.

‘Why call for me? When you had Katherine. And I’m sure plenty of other women around would have been willing to marry you too.’

‘Are you saying I’m an attractive prospect?’ Anna teases her. Then she gets serious. ‘Lady Catalina said you needed an out.’

‘You know my godmother??’ Will surprises ever cease? Catalina had promised that they would see each other soon in her last letter, but she had made no mention of knowing her wife.

‘Kat better than me,’ Anna doesn’t elaborate on the matter, ‘I needed a bride. Possibly one without expectations because-’

‘Kat.’

‘Yes.’ Anna had never been one for cruelty. She was getting a wife, but her heart was already spoken for.

‘We thought that someone just happy to leave, to start anew, would not care too much about love, as long as property and discretion was maintained.’

Cathy doesn’t miss the we. She can’t imagine being involved and planning for someone she loved to get married to someone else. But then again, Kat had planned their wedding...not for the first time she gets the urge to apologise to her.

‘Although perhaps we failed in that respect.’

‘Kat behaved exemplarily.’ Even while spending time together organising the wedding, Katherine had not let slip the tiniest negative feeling towards Cathy...or her affection towards Anna, not even once. Cathy would have not known if she had not overheard them...not that she will share that anytime soon.

‘And I did not?’ Anna asks, faking offense.

‘But why not marry Kat?’ Cathy has been asking herself that since she had heard them saying it was impossible. Can’t be a matter of status, Cathy had not much of it either. Kat clearly has the education and training of a proper lady. And it’s not like Cathy brought money or land or power.

‘That’s not my story to tell.’

Cathy adds it to the list of things to ask Kat, which range from how she knows her godmother to what her business is, exactly.

‘What a sight to come back to!’ Kat exclaims from the doorway seeing Anna and Cathy together.

Anna is immediately on her feet, reaching her in quick strides and drawing her in a hug.

‘Did you miss me?’ Kat wraps her arms around her with a laugh.

‘You know I did. I always do,’ Anna releases her from the embrace, ‘and someone else missed you too.’

‘If your aim is reached,’ Anna asks, a lady on each arm, as they are walking through the gardens together, ‘does it mean that you won’t leave on business again soon?’

‘The timing was purely coincidental. Of course, I’m pleased that my absence brought fruit. But I truly had business to attend to.’

‘Was it a productive venture?’ Cathy politely enquiries, still no idea what the business is.

‘Very.’ Kat gives her a shark-like grin.

‘Nothing illegal, right?’

‘Who do you think I am?’ Kat sounds amused rather than offended at Anna’s words. ‘There is no law against what I did.’

It doesn’t sound reassuring to Cathy, who squeezes Anna’s bicep. Her wife shakes her head. Sometimes it’s better not to ask. She doesn’t look worried, so Cathy lets it go, figuring she certainly knows better than herself.

‘Would you like join us for a nightcap in our chamber?’ Anna surprises Cathy with the invitation.

‘Nothing untoward.’

‘Unless you count drinking. Because there will be drinking. Plenty of that.’

‘Not that much,’ Kat smiles at her reassuringly, ‘it can be in your room if you prefer.’

Cathy has never seen their quarters. Their shared ones, since they also have separate rooms, she always thought for appearance’s sake...not that she had ever visited those either. And she can't say what she expected from her first visit...but it certainly wasn’t that the three of them would be lying around, just in their nightclothes, drinking and chatting.

‘How did you meet?’ Alcohol fuels Cathy’s curiosity. Or better, it removes her usual restraints that keep it from being sated.

‘I was sent away in disgrace. For sullying the good name of the family.’ Kat rolls her eyes.

‘Kat.’

‘You’re not the only girl married off and shipped to a foreign country to be hidden like a dirty little secret,’ she continues, ignoring Anna’s slightly scolding concern, ‘sorry,’ she apologises to Cathy after a beat, realising how it came across.

‘Unfortunate but true.’ Cathy shrugs it off.

‘I was married to the former secretary of my step-grandmother, before he oh-so-conveniently left the country. I was part of his severance pay, apparently. Though I’m sure they would have given me away for free if they were not so money-hungry.’

‘She gets bitter when she drinks,’ Anna tells Cathy, who is surprised by this new side of the usually sweet Kat.

‘I used to help him in his office,’ Kat lets out an unladylike snort, ‘at least he taught me something. Which got me a job here...and away from him most of the time.’ Cathy frowns. She doesn’t like the sound of that at all. ‘And then he tragically died and I found out that he had amassed quite some riches...though I’m not sure I want to know exactly how. And he left them all to me, as long as I do not remarry. Only good thing he did besides teaching me stuff. Leaving me everything, not the clause. And coming here so I could meet Anna, I guess.’

‘And dying,’ Anna adds.

‘And that too.’ Kat nods.

Legally married is different from promised to someone like Cathy was. Marrying a widow, for someone of Anna’s status, was perhaps frowned upon, but certainly not illegal. And even if it were to set tongues wagging, Anna has enough clout to ignore them.

‘Can’t believe I’m asking,’ Cathy’s head feels fuzzy, her own brain processing the words leaving her mouth with some delay, ‘but why didn’t you marry her? I would have married her.’ Even if Kat was to lose her inheritance or whatever, it’s not like Anna could not provide for her.

‘Thanks,’ Kat giggles, ‘I would have married you too.’

‘Oi!’ Anna protests. ‘What about me?’

‘You know why I can’t marry you.’ Kat reaches out to pat her hip sympathetically.

‘Why?’

‘Do we really have to bring politics in our bed?’ Anna complains.

Cathy blinks at the possessive pronoun before turning to Kat, waiting for explanation.

‘Francis left me some lands. Quite small, but the position is…strategic. Without getting into too many details, they provide access to the sea to various inland territories. Including this one. I’m keeping the area neutral. Despite common knowledge of my...links to House of La Marck, with no official connection and no proof of favouritism…nobody will support an attempt to invade or conquer it. They like the neutrality. If I were to lose the lands, they would go to someone who will block our access to the sea. Not to mention that if I married Anna, they would probably see it as an attempt on her part to expand her territories and get sole access to the sea blocking others...and I’m sure an attack or more would soon follow.’

‘You might have to repeat that another day,’ Cathy admits drowsily, realising she had lost focus a couple of times during Kat’s speech.

Kat chortles kindly, ‘Not used to drink?’

Not used indeed. Cathy wakes up in the morning confused by the warm presences beside her but more than that annoyed by their chatting. She turns, hoping to find a pillow to hide her head under...only to roll over a body. A hand comes up to rub her back and...fine. This is good too.

‘Good morning,’ Anna’s voice cheerily greets her.

‘Why?’ is her groaning response.

Cathy feels the chest she is resting her head on vibrate against her cheek as Kat chuckles. ‘Anna has a Teutonic constitution. I learned my limits years ago. You will too with time.’

They lie in bed quietly until a knock interrupts their peace. Cathy tenses, but Anna calmly calls to come in without hesitation.

‘Oh. Should I move Lady Catherine’s chambers?’ Lady Elizabeth doesn’t sound surprised to see Cathy in bed with the two other women. As Kat doesn’t loosen her hold on her, Cathy peeks up...and yes, she doesn’t look surprised either.

‘Not so fast. Give her some time to figure things out...she might want to keep some distance from Anna.’

‘Me? Why from me?’ Cathy’s rooms are in a different wing than Kat’s too, not just Anna’s…or their shared ones.

‘I can see you point,’ Bessie agrees, ignoring Anna’s protests. ‘Would you like to break fast?’ She then asks what she had come for.

‘Could we have it brought here? Something to settle the stomach...and the head.’

Hearing Kat’s request, Bessie gives her a once-over.

‘Not for me.’

‘Ah,’ Bessie nods, almost to herself, ‘I remember those days and you don’t look like then.’

As days pass, the three of them can often be found in the same room, whether working (with Cathy taking on more responsibilities for the household) or just spending time together. On one of such days, Lady Jane arrives bringing in correspondence. She hands one envelope to Anna, one to Cathy, and two to Kat.

‘Why does she get two?’ Cathy blurts out, prompting the others’ laughter. Blushing, she busies herself opening her envelope. She quickly reads the letter inside. Then she does it again. It’s from Catalina! She is going to see her soon! At a...ball? ‘Uhm, Anna?’

Before she can ask any further questions, her wife hands her her own letter. The invitation to said ball. Then Cathy looks at Kat, to see if she got something similar. After all, invitations commonly include spouses, so it makes sense that Anna would get one but not Cathy, and following that logic, Kat should get her own. But the younger woman is instead unfolding several sheets from one of her own envelopes.

‘Everything alright?’ Anna asks before Cathy can do it as they both watch a thoughtful frown appearing on Kat’s face.

‘Yes. I need to make a detour to take care of something before joining you at the estate,’ she replies while sending a meaningful look to Lady Jane, who nods in response.

‘Be careful.’

‘Always.’ Kat reassures Anna. ‘Besides, I have Rocky with me.’

Lady Jane gives them a feral grin that leaves Cathy half-terrified and half-reassured.

‘Tell me again?’

‘It’s the biggest ball in the land. It happens once a year and everyone who is someone is there. The ball is mostly an excuse to...trade gossip and make deals,’ Anna explains.

‘And my godmother will be there.’

‘Yes.’

When Cathy had learned of her arranged marriage, she didn’t know Catalina had been involved in organising it. She just knew that she would be able to see her again because she sometimes visited what would be her new country. During Kat’s absence, while talking to Anna, she learned that Catalina would visit them at least once a year – now she thinks in time for the ball – if not more...because apparently she is married to Kat’s cousin.

‘Who is that?’ Cathy hisses to Anna, glaring at the woman warmly hugging Kat for longer – and closer – that is appropriate.

‘Who knew that such a tiny body could contain so much jealousy.’

Cathy turns her glare to her wife, harrumphing both at the lack of jealousy and at the dig at her height, thus missing the object of her displeasure approaching.

‘Your Grace.’

‘Lady Anne, always a pleasure to see you again,’ Anna greets her.

‘I trust you are treating my Katherine accordingly.’

‘Like a queen.’

‘What about your wife?’ She enquires with a fleeting glance towards Cathy before giving Anna a pointed look.

‘She treats her like a queen too.’

Cathy gasps at Anna’s reply, but Lady Anne doesn’t seem fazed. She tilts her head, ‘Is that so, Lady Catherine?’

Before Cathy can say anything, the other woman is already turning around, ‘Elizabeth! What did I tell you about this kind of behaviour?’

‘To leave climbing her to Aunt Anna.’

‘Maybe don’t say that around other people,’ Kat puts the child down, smothering a laugh.

‘Why?’

‘Because then everyone will want to climb Aunt Kat,’ Anne replies.

‘I want to climb Aunt Kat,’ another child announces entering the room.

Anne gestures to the boy, ‘See.’

Kat leans over to hug him, before standing and moving to hug another woman....And then Catalina, as she appears behind them.

‘Well, we have some last-minute matters to discuss, so we’ll leave you to it,’ Anne announces, moving to grab both Kat and the other woman’s arms.

‘Can I least introduce my wife to my goddaughter?’ Catalina stops her.

Anne rolls her eyes. ‘If your wife wants.’

Catalina holds out her hand and the third woman steps forward, a warm smile on her face.

‘Catherine, this is my wife, Jane,’ her godmother says once she leads her over, ‘and this is her son, Edward.’

‘It’s a pleasure to meet you.’

‘I look forward to getting to know you,’ Jane reciprocates.

‘But not now,’ Anne reminds her, piping up from her position next to Kat.

‘Not now,’ Jane agrees.

‘Well, kiss goodbye and we will see you at the ball.’ Anne leans down to kiss the top of Elizabeth’s head.

Jane gives Catalina a peck and whispers some last recommendations to Edward, while Kat goes up to Anna and Cathy, kissing them both on the lips.

‘Guess that answers a question of mine,’ Catalina comments as the three women leave.

‘What?’ Cathy asks, once she recovers from the surprise. She had not expected to be kissed in front of people who are not in their household. Or perhaps they are, if they are Kat’s cousins...

‘Anna and Katherine are...not an open secret, but...if you know them, you know about them.’ Catalina gives Anna a meaningful look.

One day Cathy will ask her godmother why she suggested her for the marriage knowing Anna was taken...or perhaps it was exactly that. No hope for love, but also no risk of...unwanted interest? But that’s not the day. Besides, she got love. In spades.

‘Heaven helps us,’ Catalina mutters as a hush falls over the ballroom at the cousins’ grand entrance.

Cathy gapes. She thought Kat was beautiful at the wedding, but she had clearly gone for understated because that was nothing compared to how absolutely stunning she looks now.

Anna squeezes arm, ‘I know, but get a hold of yourself.’

Cathy closes her mouth and then turns surprised eyes to her wife.

‘I just have plenty of practice acting as if her beauty doesn’t leave me speechless,’ Anna whispers to her.

However, that doesn’t seem to be what had prompted Catalina's reaction. ‘They truly went all out this time,’ her godmother comments. ‘Don’t look at me,’ she continues, aware of their curious gazes. ‘I might be married to Jane, but it doesn’t mean I have any idea of what goes on in that mind of hers. Even less when all three cousins are involved.’ She chances a look at Anna. ‘Do you?’

‘She has been unusually busy lately but hasn’t shared so far.’

Catalina raises her head as they join her for breakfast, ‘Katherine was a no show too?’

It might take a while for Cathy to get used to her godmother knowing and not caring about her and her wife sharing...a lover? Mistress? Partner? Well, Kat.

Anna shakes her head. When they had left the ballroom to retire for the night, Kat and her cousins were still flitting from one guest to another, the remaining ones at least, weaving connections and networks as they had been doing the whole evening.

‘Lady Margaret, Lady Jane,’ Catalina calls their attention, ‘do you know where-’

‘They were in the library when we passed it,’ a third woman replies.

‘Thank you, Maria.’

Indeed that’s where they find the cousins, mess of papers on the table in front of them.

‘Did you stay up all night?’

‘We needed to check that everything was correct, make sure the deals are closed properly, didn’t miss anything.’

‘Deals,’ Catalina repeats.

‘Exchanges. Contracts. Transactions,’ Anne says.

‘Of course,’ Catalina mutters. As if she should have expected anything different. ‘Is it another gamefowl farm?’

‘I still don’t see what you have against that. It’s making us a lot of money,’ Jane points out. ‘But no. You have been talking about wanting to be closer to Cathy.’

‘And you about missing Catalina,’ Kat joins the conversation, addressing Cathy. ‘And I never gave you a wedding gift.’

‘But about me?’

‘You got Cathy,’ Kat tells Anna, who nods.

‘And she stayed,’ Anne adds, receiving a small glare from Anna. It is no secret that there is an open invitation for Kat to go and live with Anne...Invitation that has been repeatedly extended since the older cousin had first heard about Anna getting married…not to Kat.

‘But the new house comes with extensive stables. Horses included. All yours,’ Kat continues.

‘New house?’

Kat rummages through the papers. ‘Where is the map?’

Jane hands it to her.

‘No, not of the land. The one of the region.’

Another one is fished out from the mounds of papers strewn around.

‘So...Anne is the new owner of this area.’ Kat points a spot on the map, then another one. ‘Jane got this. Neither have legal connections to you-’

‘So nobody has ground for complaint.’

Jane looks at them expectantly.

‘I would say it’s the lack of sleep, but it’s not,’ Anne informs the married couple less acquainted with Jane’s love of puns.

‘Catalina loves them!’

‘Why don’t we let Kat continues?’ Catalina eagerly suggests before Anne can open her mouth and get her in trouble. She loves her wife, but she is not as fond of puns as Jane is...although she has yet to find anyone with the same love for wordplays.

‘As I was saying, officially they are completely independent, but we’re still securing the borders and sea access even more,’ Kat continues, ‘and everyone lives closer. Also I got this.’

Anna looks at the contract Kat hands her, then at the map. ‘Is this the one you have been eyeing for a while?’

‘Yes.’

‘And all of this...you got it legally, right?’

The three cousins in unison bring one hand to their chest. ‘Do you doubt us?’

‘Lady Catherine, a minute of your time.’

Waiting until they are alone, Anne then asks, ‘What do you know about Jane’s husband?’

Cathy is taken aback by the question. ‘Not a lot. Short-tempered. Openly pursued Kat despite being married to her cousin. Died falling from a horse.’

‘What about Kat’s?’

Cathy grimaces. 'Few things.’ Kat doesn’t like to talk about the matter so she never presses. ‘None too good. Or any good at all.’

‘I’ll tell you three things they had in common: they claimed to love my cousins, they hurt my cousins, they died in unfortunate accidents.’ Anne counts on her fingers. Then she looks at Cathy straight in the eyes. ‘Would be a shame if something were to happen to you...’

With her words hanging in the air, with a casual stride Anne leaves the room...and a gobsmacked Cathy.

Seeing her standing still, stunned expression on her face, Anna approaches her wife, ‘Are you alright?’

‘What happened?’ Catalina asks, joining them.

‘I’m not sure,’ Anna answers as Cathy gives no sign she is going to do so, ‘I saw Anne leaving and found her like this.’

‘Did she threaten you that if you hurt her cousin, you will meet your untimely demise?’ Catalina asks knowingly.

‘Oh.’ Anna nods in understanding. ‘Should have thought about that. I’m sorry, I didn’t think about warning you in advance.’

‘She did the same with you?’ Cathy finds her voice again, directing her question to both women.

‘Consider it the official welcome to the family,’ Anna grins at her.

Cathy smiles at the thought before it falls. ‘Wait- did she actually kill them?’

She thought it was merely a threat. A warning. Not-

‘I have no intention to find out…do you?’

—————————————

Not sure if I’m happy with this as I'm struggling to get a read on this trio, but I wanted to write some OT3 for Pika so this is what I got.

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fyeah-bangtan7 · 4 years

Text

Jimin: “I’m the kind of person who likes to be loved”

#bangtan #jimin #m:weverse magazine #p:website #201123

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tweedstoat · 3 years

Note

Hi! Just wanted to pop in and say how much I adore your fics. The Elia, Rhaenys, and Aegon tags are nearly impossible to get through. 95% of the fics don’t even feature them prominently and of the remaining 5%, either they’re horrible people bullying faultless Lyanna and Jon 😒 or wonderful angels (unlike that awful witch Catelyn Stark 🙄) who exist to be Jon and Lyanna’s cheerleaders and absolve them of any guilt.

Also I wanted to commend you on your Rhaenys and Elia characterization. Especially Rhaenys! I think a trend I sometimes see is that female characters are only allowed to be happy after they’ve rejected any femininity and taken up weapons and become brash and daring and loudly opinionated. And those girls deserve happiness for sure! But it’s so nice to see a Rhaenys who does lean towards soft power. Who isn’t only a horse and weapons and wild sex enthusiast because she happens to be Dornish. Because that kind of characterization doesn’t really ring true to me for someone like Rhaenys who is in the spotlight a lot. Who’s actions and personality are going to reflect on her abandoned mother who lost out on the throne. I’m so glad characters like her and Elia and Rhaella get to be the heroes of a story while still performing femininity (and frankly using that as their weapons).

And I think you handle the Lyanna situation very well. Personally I’m ambivalent towards Jon and am not fond of Lyanna. But I also don’t like overblown animosity that feels cartoonish. There might be negative feelings directed at them by certain characters, but they aren’t acted upon in any uncharacteristic way. Those two feel more like afterthoughts to Elia and Rhaenys. And while I very much lean into the drama of it all (because it’s so rare for Elia to win this much) I can very much appreciate the reality that Elia and Rhaenys aren’t spending every waking moment thinking about Jon and Lyanna. They have lives to lead and it’s pointless keeping a scoreboard of who got what win over the other. There’s no need to compete, but there’s also no need to be friendly and accommodating is the vibe I’m getting from your story and I really love that. (But I also like that negative feelings exist because let them be human and relatable!!!!!)

Sorry for the word vomit 😅 but I really love your writing and it’s one of the only things I look forward to in this fandom anymore tbh. Thank you so much!

this is so sweet oh my goodness and I’m in a crappy mood today because of uni stress so this really made my day thank you for sending me this

I’m glad you find Rhaenys and Rhaella exercising soft power interesting. I think you’ve got the right take on Rhaenys! She is someone who would love to be able to be loud and brash and is quite opinionated (see: her outright telling her father she would marry anyone to get away from him) but in the red keep where her every move is scrutinized she doesn’t have the option to do that. She has a complicated relationship with the way she presents herself which is also heavily tied up in the fact that she is the only visibly non-white member of her family and she faces scorn for obviously being half-Dornish.

I think the whole “I’m not like other girls” vibe of only letting girl characters be cool and better when they dislike girls who behave in “traditionally feminine” ways is just as shitty as painting girls who don’t behave in traditionally feminine ways as “masculine” (and trying to say they have male privilege – like what?). The truth is that even though some traits are ascribed by society to one gender or the other – there aren’t any traits that are more inherent to one gender than the other. And quite frankly in a society like Westeros women are going to have a complicated relationship with their performance of gender regardless of how they perform it.

I also really enjoy women in old stories using the small tools available to them as women to undermine a system that disregards them because it’s fun!

Thank you for saying that my handling of the Jon/Lyanna situation is realistic! I once got accused of bashing - which I don’t want to do so that was a bit of a blow. But I don’t think I’m bashing them to have my characters think negatively of them or disliking them. I did some investigation (mainly by reading r/relationships lmao) into how people feel when their parents break up due to affairs and the common thread I saw was a LOT of pain and resentment and yeah some jealousy and dislike of half siblings who resulted from those new relationships. And that’s in our society where we have stuff like divorce and no one’s starting wars over kidnapped fiancées. Imagine how much more resentment there would be in a situation where not only did your father leave you but that also 1. Put your life in jeopardy 2. Put your inheritance rights in jeopardy 3. You can’t just leave and tell him to fuck himself because in this society the family you have grants you saftey and power. Honestly Rhaegar’s lucky someone hasn’t snapped and stabbed him yet.

You're right to say they aren't accommodating or friendly, saying that Lyanna and Jon are an afterthought is probably right. Rhaenys Rhaella and Elia have approached something like tolerance with Lyanna – they’ll leave her alone if she leaves them alone and that’s the way everyone likes it. In an everyone lived situation I simply don’t think it would be realistic to approach it in any other way. And because Elia and Rhaenys are more on the “winning” side of this I dont think they would spend every waking moment dwelling and brooding on Lyanna.

I think this tendency to have Elia and Rhaenys approve whole-heartedly of Lyanna and Jon is caused by 4 factors

1. The misguided need to have them be good or to “give them agency”. Making a character a flat nobody who doesn’t have any emotions towards a situation that would be dangerous and deeply personally humiliating to them isn’t making them good or giving them agency its making them boring and unrealistic.

2. Not wanting to “pit girls against one another”. Look i hate this trope of 2 girls catfighting over a guy as much as anyone else but I have noticed that sometimes people say “don’t pit women against each other” when....2 girl characters don’t like each other for totally legitimate reasons. Elia doesn’t dislike Lyanna because she loves Rhaegar and Lyanna was a homewrecker who stole him. Elia is understandably angry because the whole realm is destabilized, her children’s lives and futures are in danger, and she’s been nationally humiliated. Let female characters be as complex as the male ones. No one bats an eye that Ned and Jaime despise one another because they’re men and we don’t expect male characters to be beautiful angels who never have a bad thought about anyone.

3. To have them be good to contrast “bitchy” Catelyn. Cat isn’t a bitch and I will die on this hill. If you want to look at who was primarily responsible for the whole Jon situation Rhaegar and Ned are right there.

4. Being unable to conceptualize non-white characters as having motivations (and negative emotions) that are either directed towards or separate from a (usually white) fandom fav character like Lyanna or Jon.

#ladies rebellion verse #Anonymous #asks #also i find it funny that the fandom has seized on horse riding as being proof that a girl is special and cool and nota dumb girly girtl #when horse riding was one of the common forms of exercise noblewomen took part in

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pocket-poly · 3 years

Text

Emotional libertarianism, as defined by More Than Two, is “a belief that every individual is entirely responsible for his or her own emotional responses and that person’s behaviour is never the “cause” of another person’s emotion.” This concept is talked a lot about in polyamory, particularly in conversations around personal autonomy and boundaries. Most frequently, I’ve seen it come up a lot in discussions where couples are opening up a previously monogamous relationship, and one person is struggling with negative feelings around their partner dating and loving other people.

If you do something that leads to someone else feeling hurt, the common expectation is to apologise for what you have done and, where appropriate, to make reparations for your actions that led to that hurt. However, when taken to an extreme, people can twist this by blaming all their negative feelings on someone else’s actions, essentially making them responsible for their emotional state to an unreasonable extent. In a past relationship of mine, my ex had some extreme attachment issues, and would constantly guilt-trip me for spending any time without him due to his fear of abandonment. This emotionally abusive and exhausting relationship deteriorated to the point where I would feel guilty for spending time on my hobbies or even with my own family, because I knew that doing so would directly lead to him throwing a tantrum that I didn’t care about him.

Against this backdrop, emotional libertarianism can feel quite freeing. The concept does have some merits: it champions individual autonomy, motivates people to work through their own trauma independently, and discourages people from becoming overly reliant on their partners for emotional reassurance. However, as with anything, this can be toxic when taken to an extreme and used as a tool for abuse. Some people use emotional libertarianism as a way to dodge responsibility or accountability for their actions, to punish their partners for feeling entirely reasonable and human feelings as a result of toxic abuse, and to manipulate their partners into suppressing their negative emotions so as to keep their partner happy and not appear “controlling”.

With all this in mind, where exactly is the line? How do we honour our personal autonomy, while also being compassionate and caring to our partners?

ACTIONS HAVE CONSEQUENCES, HOWEVER UNINTENTIONAL

With autonomy comes responsibility, but not in the ways you may think. While we are autonomous individuals who can do whatever we want, I think we also have to accept that our actions have consequences, and have the potential to directly influence how other people feel, even if the results were not what you intended. We do not live in a vacuum, and sometimes the things we do have unforeseen repercussions. An example would be if you went out on a date with someone else, and came home to find your partner in tears from a jealousy attack while you were away. While we cannot take responsibility for other people’s feelings because we ultimately cannot control how other people choose to feel, we are responsible for our actions and how they may affect others. Being in a relationship with someone suggests that you care about them to some extent, and one would hope that people who love each other would try their very best not to hurt each other, are committed to not exacerbating each other’s pain and suffering when it is expressed, and endeavour to create spaces where their partners feel safe and loved. This means we have to own up to mistakes when we have made them, instead of trying to shift blame onto others. In cases where the hurt was unintentional, acknowledging the impact of your actions and holding space for your partner to process their feelings can go a long way, and practising empathy and compassion for your partner is key.

TALK ABOUT YOUR NEEDS FOR CARE AND SUPPORT EARLY ON

Different people have different needs when it comes to giving and receiving care from their partners. One thing that my anchor partner does very well is that he is able to share his problems with me, without necessarily making them my problem as well. He informs me of his struggles so that I am kept in the loop of what is going on in his life, but beyond that, I am not expected or obligated to talk through his feelings, because most of the time, that is not what he needs or wants from me. I, on the other hand, prefer to talk about my problems with my loved ones and solve them through collaborative discussion; however, I recognise that not everyone has the time or energy for this, so I try to spread it out amongst people who have the capacity to do so and genuine willingness to help, such family, friends, and occasionally helpful strangers in polyamory discussion groups. I ask for what I need from people, but I never feel entitled to it, and I am grateful for the people in my life who do share their time and energy with me when I am struggling.

Some people have the emotional capacity to help others with processing their feelings about a situation and enjoy doing so, while others do not for a wide variety of reasons. Some people may view someone else sharing their problems with them as a nuisance and a burden, while others view it as a privilege and a gift that their partners can be so vulnerable and trusting with them to ask for their help and advice. When dealing with negative emotions, some people prefer to receive emotional reassurance from their partners, while others prefer direct advice and practical solutions. Some prefer to externalise and share their issues with other people, while others prefer to internalise and go away to handle their feelings on their own. There is no right or wrong answer as to how much care should be given or received, and it is merely an issue of compatibility between people. It’s important to talk about what you are able to give to a relationship and what you would like to receive, in order to avoid mismatched expectations and feelings of entitlement.

When setting boundaries and making relationship agreements with our partners, those boundaries and agreements have to be honoured in order for trust to build and flourish. If you cannot stick to certain agreements for whatever reason, then talk about renegotiating them so you can find a solution that works for all parties. If there isn’t a solution that works for all parties, then that will just lead to unhappiness, resentment, or a breakup later down the line. So if you fail to communicate, deliberately disrespect your partner’s boundaries in the name of personal autonomy, and proceed to tell your partner their feelings are not your problem, don’t be surprised if your partner doesn’t stick around, and uses their personal autonomy to end their relationship with you.

CONTEXTUALISE YOUR PARTNER'S FEELINGS AND REACTIONS

Circling back to empathy and compassion, viewing your partner’s reactions to situations within the context of trauma they have experienced may give you some insight into why they are struggling in the way that they are. It is this knowledge that can sometimes help reframe someone’s reactions that may, at first glance, seem completely irrational. For example, someone who has a history with neglectful parents or cheating partners may struggle with jealousy attacks more often than people who do not. People with certain mental illnesses or disorders, like anxiety or BPD, may also respond differently to situations; for example, I myself am autistic, and as a child would get extremely upset by small changes to my routine in ways that neurotypical people would not.

How much leniency you decide to exercise in light of your partner’s trauma or personal issues, and how much you wish to change your behaviour or beliefs to accommodate those things out of consideration, is completely up to you. This is a fine balance to strike, with no one-size-fits-all answer. However, while it is important to be mindful of personal differences between yourself and your loved ones, it is also important not to excuse their behaviour to an unreasonable extent. For example, if your partner proceeds to verbally harass you for making a genuine mistake, or use you as their personal therapist or an emotional crutch, at some point that would be unreasonable, exhausting, and even abusive. Respect your partner’s boundaries, but do not disrespect your own in the process.

ABOVE ALL, BE KIND

Ethics is sticky, and there will almost always be an exception to every rule. At the end of the day, while someone’s feelings may not be your obligation or responsibility to manage, it is kind to help them with processing their feelings if you have the capacity and willingness to do so. It’s also important to not get too caught up in your pride and let it get in the way of you comforting or apologising to someone, or to ignore your partner’s feelings in favour of logically justifying your actions. If I accidentally bump into a stranger on the street and they fall over, I say “sorry”, not because I wanted to hurt them, but because of the impact of my actions and the hurt that resulted from it. It’s easy to think, “I don’t have to apologise, because this situation wasn’t my fault,” but are you really going to tell someone that they shouldn’t have been there in the first place, or that their pain is entirely their problem? Probably not.

I enjoy communicating compassionately with my partners, developing mutual understanding, respect, and consideration, and getting as much out of my relationships as the effort I put into them. Being kind and loving takes humility and vulnerability, but it is exactly those things that lead to supportive and fulfilling relationships.

*This blog post was originally published on my Wordpress blog, Poly Philia.*

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multisfabulis · 3 years

Text

Love’s Descent into Madness

Dethronement (Chapter 3/3)

Word Count: 3627

TW: Graphic depictions of violence, gore, decapitation, and major character death

Happy holidays!

I hope everyone likes the ending because writing this was suffering. Winter decided to come early this year and I absolutely hate the cold so a lot of this was written with numb fingers. The past few days have also been tiring and, because I wanted to get this out before Christmas, I had to pull an all-nighter to finish this and rewrite it to make it look pretty so this was a sleep-deprived fic.

Okay, so I have some things I need to explain:

First off, that line about Ayano needing to apply herself more to her schoolwork was actually a reference to a piece of fanart I saw of Saeru (in disguise as Kenjirou) helping Ayano with her homework and subtly taking digs at her the whole time. I just thought of it while I was writing that paragraph and thought it'd be a neat reference. I can't find the Tweet but I'm hoping someone has a link to it!

Second off, that instance of Kenjirou almost ruining Saeru's plan is a bit of foreshadowing to another Kagepro fic I'm in the works of writing. It may not be the next Kagepro fic I write but it IS coming.

Thirdly, the whole meaning behind Azami not being able to die but still being killed. I know it sounds like the "People die when they are killed" meme but let me explain. I needed to think of a way Azami could still die but without anyone telling me "She's immortal, she can't die" so the way I went about it is, the Queen Snake was what let her be immortal. Because that was the snake that, in my fic, marked her as a god, she couldn't die. Once she gave that snake to Marry, she lost her god status, bringing her down to our level. However, because she was still a Gorgon, I made it so that she couldn't die by natural causes, I.E. starvation, sleep deprivation, etc. She was now an immortal mortal, meaning she couldn't die from natural causes BUT she could now be killed. I don't know if this makes a lot of sense but this is the best way I can describe it.

Finally, the ending. It only occurred to me when I was writing the build-up to it that I wanted to make it a sort of dark twist on Kagepro's themes of moving on after a loved one's death. Saeru decides to move on after Azami's death but he regarded her as dead years ago and was the one to kill her. I don't know if it worked the way I wanted it to but I tried my best.

I'm happy this didn't take that long unlike another past project of mine and I hope everyone who's read this enjoyed it!

Read on AO3 | Read on DA | Support me on Ko-fi!

The never-ending world, or the Daze as it was now called, had undergone many changes over the years. It was only natural since it was ordered to swallow up any unfortunate souls that were unlucky enough to die on August 15th and the world needed to accommodate for its ever increasing number of occupants. Yet there were some things that never changed, no matter how much time had passed. Absence truly did make the heart grow fonder.

He was in very familiar territory. Casually strolling through the dark woods revealed a large clearing where a small decrepit house stood. The moon’s radiance acted as if it were a spotlight, shining down upon it to let him know she was here. It may be an inferior replica but there was no mistaking it. Saeru was home.

It had been several years since his departure from the Daze. The rest of his siblings were gone, having ventured out to the real world in their human vessels and he couldn’t blame them for leaving. Who’d want to stay in a place where the only company you had was a good-for-nothing has-been of a queen? That’s why he followed the example his four siblings set and escaped when the opportunity presented itself. He really wanted to thank them when he had the chance.

The body he left in was a person by the name of Tateyama Kenjirou. A hardworking teacher and devoted family man, he and Saeru met when he and his wife were caught in a landslide. Saeru promised to bring her back if the man allowed him to reside in his body and he accepted his terms of the bargain. That was how their unlikely partnership began, union between human and snake.

It felt simply amazing to have a body to control. While it had taken him some time to adapt and familiarize himself with human behavior, he nevertheless reveled in it. No longer was he a snake relegated to devising plans. He had the means to carry them out himself and no one would be none the wiser. At least, that’s what he believed before a certain idiotic girl proved him wrong.

He had to give her some credit. Not only did she figure out most of his plan just by reading her father’s research but she learned of his existence all due to a small yet sloppy mistake. If she only applied that amount of effort into her schoolwork, then she wouldn’t have been as stupid as she led herself to believe. There was, however, one thing she didn’t take into account.

She thought killing herself would stop him from going after everyone. What she didn’t think about was the advantage her death would give him. One less person to worry about ruining his plan and she left behind a perfectly traumatized helper. The damn brat was like putty in his hands; a few convincing threats to his precious “family” and a deal with the devil was made.

But then the dear old professor kept butting into his business. There were several times over the past two years where he came out because he wanted to spend some “quality time” with the remainder of his family. There was one instance he could recall in which his plan was almost thwarted but Saeru was able to take back the reins. It was too easy to pull the wool over his partner’s eyes and trick him into thinking he was dreaming. It wasn’t like he was lying to him, he was just using the information he knew about humans to his benefit.

Today was when his plan was truly enacted. All the necessary people had arrived, including his traitorous sibling. Konoha, as they were now called, seemed to have forgotten what the humans did to their real family all those years ago and had allied with them. Their compassion for them had its perks, though. It only took one well-aimed bullet to strike them down, leaving them open for a permanent takeover.

The resulting bloodbath was nothing short of marvelous. Having a body, especially one such as his, meant much more fun and creative ways to play with his toys. Spines breaking as they hit concrete walls and organs hitting the floor with a wet slap was like music to his ears. He even ripped out a pathetic shut-in’s throat with his bare hands just because he could and it was oh so enjoyable to hear him choke on his own blood. Too bad it was over all too soon.

The crybaby brat was left as the sole survivor. He knew what she was capable of and she was the essential component. Yet, he couldn’t help feeling a small sort of kinship with her, which he found funny. He was, in a way, her subject and she his queen but it felt as if they were equals. Perhaps, if he had her powers, he too could rewind time to the point he would’ve taken a different path. To spend more time with the one he loved above all else… That was a dream best left in the past.

He decided to leave her be so she’d be able to mourn her losses. He needed to use the little time he had to take care of unfinished business. He fled from the scene by going through the portal she created in the midst of her despair.

He found himself in what seemed to be a white void. The floor beneath him rippled when his feet touched the surface and he realized he was standing on water. His reflection stared back at him when he cast his eyes downward. The body his sibling graciously gifted to him allowed him to change it however he wanted and he liked the changes he made. A vessel specifically tailored just for him was such a wonderful thing and it was a shame to have to give it up.

A pair of small black horns stuck out of long dark hair tied into a braid. Black scales painted the edges of his face and eyes, trailing down his neck before concealing themselves under the layers of clothes. He kept his red eyes and fangs from when he was a snake so he’d still be recognizable. Blood coated his hands and stained the only article of pristine white clothing he wore, which he hoped would intimidate his prey. She’d never see this coming.

Finding an exit out of the void was simple. All he had to do was take a step and he was in an entirely different place. There were an endless amount of stairs and corridors leading to doors, most of what he could see on fire. The heat was surprisingly pleasant as he wandered around the seemingly limitless labyrinth. It was then he spotted a tangle of black hair with a sliver of red hastily entering one of the doors. With a rush of adrenaline running through his veins, he ran towards the door. It had been so long since he played his favorite game of cat and mouse.

He chased her through many areas of the Daze. One was of a ruined city where the setting sun gave way too many shadows for her to hide in. Another was of an urban landscape, not unlike a major street intersection, where there were dozens of blood splatters decorating the asphalt. It was after he cut across a nighttime city he arrived at his destination.

Mother was inside. The house she and her wretched human “family” lived and laughed in for the few years they stayed there. It was fitting for her and him to settle their issues in the same place their troubles began. She’ll regret leaving behind the ones that truly loved her.

He walked up to the house. Overgrown grass crept over the foundation and ivy crawled all along the flaky walls. There were broken shards of glass inside the windows, which would make it hard for trespassers to sneak in without alerting anyone. Parts of the roof had collapsed inward and the front door was hanging on by a thread. Mother’s really let the place go, hasn’t she?

He stopped just before the door. How did he want to approach this? She had to know he was here so there was no need in being stealthy. He then did the next best thing, which was to kick the door down till he was inside. He smashed through it, reducing it to mere splinters. That was easy.

The room he was in now was the same room he proposed the idea of creating this world to Mother. It was empty, save for a few pieces of overturned furniture scattered about the place and debris from the roof. Moonlight shone down from above, illuminating the room, though it wasn’t necessary. He could see perfectly well in the dark, despite the limitations of his “human” body.

There were two doors that stood in front of him. Beyond them were bedrooms, one being that brat Shion’s and the other Mother’s. It was a coin toss as to which room she was hiding in and he hated wasting time with trivial matters like this. Besides, even if he did end up picking the wrong choice, she wouldn’t get away undetected. His hearing was almost as good as hers and she knew that.

An idea sprang into his mind to try luring her out. He stood at the wall separating the two rooms, wound up his fist, and punched it. The sheer power in the hit caused a crater to form in the wall as dust sprinkled down from the ceiling. He heard something fall from behind the left door and a sharp intake of breath. The corners of his mouth curved up as he tried to fight back a laugh. There she was.

Keeping his excitement in check, he pushed open the door. Inside the room were the remains of a bed with two nightstands on either side of it and an empty window over to the right. He didn’t need the light coming in from a hole in the ceiling to see her. Mother sat in a corner of the room, her whole body shaking.

She hadn’t changed at all. She still had the same cascade of raven hair tied up with a red ribbon, the same black dress. The same red eyes resembling his own were now staring at him in pure fear. It must’ve been quite the shock for her to see Saeru walking around and being able to express his moods in a more effective way. She’d finally know how much and how deep his feelings ran.

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it, Mother?” he asked, putting on a fake smile.

When she didn’t respond, he continued on with, “Nothing to say to me? Not even a welcome home? I know the last time we talked was years ago but I thought you’d still have some love in your heart for me. But I guess not.”

She still hadn’t said anything. He was getting rather annoyed at the silent treatment, even if it did bring him a modicum of amusement. Does she really think staying quiet in this situation will save her? Well, he had a way of making her talk and he deserved to brag about his accomplishments.

“If you can’t already tell, I paid a visit to the real world,” he said, noting the sudden pique of interest. “It’s changed so much since our time out there. I’ve met so many interesting people during my trip, including the kids my siblings are inhabiting the bodies of. I even got the chance to meet your successor, what was her name again? Ah, right, Marry.”

He saw the quick flash of anger across her face as she asked, “What did you do to her?”

“You can rest easy,” he replied, his temper beginning to flare up. “I haven’t laid a finger on that crybaby brat’s head. She’s all right, physically, at least.”

It was then her eyes wandered down to his blood-soaked hands. Gone was the anger as horror came to replace it at the grisly sight. He wondered when she’d notice that and he was pleased to know her reaction was how he predicted it to be. Her imagination had to be running wild with all the ways that blood got on his hands. The temptation of telling her his gruesome acts was there but this was more fun.

“Her mind, though, must be forever scarred,” he said with a dissonant smile. “I imagine her heart shattered to pieces after I killed her friends.”

“Why are you doing this?!” she demanded, her teary eyes full of fury. “Why must you hurt me so?”

All the fun he was having at her expense evaporated. Was she being serious? Did she really have the gall to ask why he was doing all this? Maybe it was time to remind her of the fault she held in this.

“I think the better question is, why did you choose them over us? Why did you abandon us?” He crouched down and rested his cheek on his hand.

“What are you talking about? I never abandoned you or your siblings! I tried my best to have the two most important things in my life get along without any issue.” She gestured to him with her hand. “You were the only one who had a problem with it!”

His eyes narrowing, he asked in indignation, “How could you expect me to not have a problem with it? How could you forget all the pain, all the suffering, all the torment the humans dealt on to you? How could you run off with that man and bear his child after everything they’ve done to you?”

It was at this point she stood up. He did as well, noticing the hard glint of stubbornness in her eyes. He already knew what was coming and he didn’t want to hear the same old, tired speech.

“Tsukihiko was different. He was kind to me, he cared for me.” She put a hand on her chest, where her heart was. “He loved me. He was treated the same way I was so---”

“So you thought you and him were the same? Please,” he interrupted, scoffing at the ridiculousness of the thought. “You and that man were never the same and you know why? He was but a mere mortal and you a god. You will never belong with the humans, no matter how much you try and forget that fact.”

“What do you want from me? An apology, is that it?” she asked, exasperated. He wanted much more than empty platitudes.

“What I want is for you to understand exactly how much you’ve hurt me.” He took a couple steps toward her, causing dust to rain down on top of him. “You refused to heed my warnings, took that brat’s side over mine, and you tried to leave me behind in this world. Who does that to someone they once claimed to love? Someone whose only crime was loving them?

“You’ve become the very thing you’ve never wanted to be.” He locked eyes with her and gave voice to all the pain and scorn he felt. “You’re a monster.”

It was as if he stabbed her through the gut with a knife. Tears spilled over as she fell to her knees, holding her head in her hands. It was bad enough for the humans to call her that when they knew nothing about her. It must’ve been like a betrayal to hear that come from someone she once considered to be her closest friend. Still, he got a dark sense of satisfaction seeing her break down. It served her right to feel only a fraction of the pain he’s dealt with for years.

“And yet--” he paused as she looked up at him-- “despite everything you did to me, I still love you. I was created to serve you and be with you for however long you wanted but I grew to genuinely love you. How could I not?”

She withdrew further into the corner after he stepped closer. The question he wanted, needed to ask leapt into his mind. A simple yes or no question and whatever her answer was would determine what he’d do next.

“It’s because of my love for you I ask,” he began, paying close attention to her face, “if you still hold some fondness for the humans. Do you still love your family?”

Without any hesitance in her voice, she replied with, “Of course I do. I’ll always love them. Tsukihiko, Shion, Marry…I love them all from the bottom of my heart.”

That was the answer he feared to hear. Her saying that proved to him she was too far gone and needed to be put out of her misery. They took everything away from her, from her happiness to her sanity. It’s because he loved her he’d be willing to give her the sweet release she deserved.

He started walking towards her. She tried to crawl away from him but found herself cornered with no means of escape. A wicked grin split across his face as he came into the moon’s silvery ray of light. He stopped just short of her, towering above her small, trembling form.

“What are you going to do to me?” she asked, scared for her life. “Whatever it is, I can’t die.”

“Oh, Mother…” He knelt down in front of her and cupped her cheeks. Her scales were smooth to the touch as he wiped away her tears. “You’re right in that you can’t die. But that doesn’t mean you can’t be killed.”

His smile growing ever larger, he said, “You lost your immortality the moment you passed on your crown.”

Her eyes widened in horror as his hands slid down to her neck. He could feel her pulse thudding against his palms, his slender fingers wrapped around her throat. She softly whimpered and he leaned in close. He whispered into her ear his final words before her denouement.

“Goodnight, Mother.”

It wasn’t hard to crush her windpipe. Her nails dug into his arms in a desperate attempt to fight back but he merely brushed them off. He knew she was close to death when her eyes started to roll to the back of her head. Then he had an idea to end this in something more similar to his style.

Her skin began to tear apart as he pulled her head up like a weed. The sound of her neck breaking echoed in the empty house. He finally ripped her head off her shoulders, blood pouring out of the stump as he stood up. Her body slumped onto the floor, the moon’s light reflected off the crimson pool.

Mother’s bright red eyes were now dull and lifeless. Her mouth lolled open and what little saliva she had trickled out of the corners. He could see just a sliver of her vertebrae sticking out of the bottom of her neck. He untied the ribbon holding her hair up, wiped the spit away with his sleeve, and shut her eyes. Her dark tresses felt soft on his skin as he touched their foreheads together.

“We’ll be together forever, right, Mother?” he said with a depraved smile before crazed laughter spilled out of his mouth like a stream.

It was only a matter of waiting now before time was reset. How far back it’d go, he didn’t know. Even if it was as far back to the beginning, he’d remember the events of this loop an do them again. He’d do them again and again to his heart’s content and no one would be able to stop him.

The only thing he wouldn’t commit again was his act of matricide. It was a one time thing and it was done to give him “closure” or whatever the humans called it. Mother warped into someone he didn’t recognize and he needed to accept that the person he knew had died a long time ago. At least he’ll always have his memories of her kept close to his heart.

It was time to look forward and move ahead to the future. Whatever the next summers brought, he was sure to enjoy every last bit.

#airi's writing #snake of clearing eyes #azami #fanfiction #kagerou project #canon divergence #violence tw #gore tw #decapitation tw #major character death tw

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chidoroki · 3 years

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Head empty, pre-TPN season 2 thoughts only.

Normally I don’t even bother with hiding spoilers but since the new season is so close I’ll put everything below a cut (if tumblr cooperates) because I do want anime-onlys to enjoy the season with as little knowledge to what madness is about to happen as possible. This is just a bunch of notes that filled my head over the past couple days.. weeks? A long time.. and if I didn’t write them all down somewhere I wouldn’t stop thinking about them.. so if you understand this whole mess, then kudos to you.

So, here’s your post-season 1/ch37+ spoiler warning.

Demon language:

With Mujika and Sonju making their grand first appearances, I hope actually implement the demon language this time?

The only word spoken in the language in season 1 was the demon god’s name, which was just changed to “Him” (sub) or “The One” (dub), so ignoring it there was fine.

Granted, our demon friends don’t say much in their language during the upcoming arc, aside from this moment in ch48, but I can see the anime passing it off as a mere whisper between the two of them just so they don’t have to worry about it.

I don’t recall any of the GP poachers using the language though.. right? Pretty sure they don’t..

Anyways, all I’m saying is that they better figure something out by the Ayshe shows up way later in future seasons.

Episode count? 24?

Short answer: I don’t think so? Did once, but stuff happened. Anyways..

Season 1 ended in March 2019, which is also when we learned we were getting a second season and once we found later on that S2 was originally going to air in October 2020, I immediately thought we were getting about 24 eps.

I thought with all that time between seasons, 24 eps would be reasonable and that S2 would end at ch101. S1 managed to adapt 37 chapters, so 64 chapters in a season twice as long sound decent enough, right?

By the time we reach ch101, it would give us the demon forest, shelter B06-32, Goldy Pond and the short trip to Cuvitidala. (all of which would make this long wait for s2 sooo worth it btw.)

By this point we learn a bunch about the outside world, Norman being alive, what happened to Phil, and the demon bastard himself.

I bring up ch101 as a stopping point because it’s the last chapter before the two year time skip and.. I honestly can’t see them doing a time skip mid-season?

I mean, they could if they wanted to, I guess? Having everyone age up suddenly between episodes via a montage, a quick summary or even flashbacks of what we missed.. but maybe at the start of a season? Not in the middle.

Right now we know anime original scenes are going to be included into season 2 so I’m kinda hoping that once we do eventually reach the time skip we learn more about the search Emma’s group went on for T7W/golden water/temples.

I counted. If S2 does indeed get this many episodes, ep23 (or 22, if there’s a break in between somewhere or whatever) will land on my birthday and you can bet I’ll be beyond happy

HOWEVER! all the hope I once had about a 24ep season vanished due to the clusterfuck that was 2020. Thanks to the worldwide pandemic, many anime were put on hold and pushed back several months, with TPN airing this month rather than the original October date.

It was a bummer hearing about the delay at first but I never complained about it. I much rather have the studios prioritize their employee’s health over production.

Even if S2 did reach ch101, or even Goldy Pond, they would need to find a ton of new voice actors, and with how the world is working now.. eh, I have some doubts.

Cloverworks also has two other series airing this month aside from TPN so needless to say they’ll be a bit busy, especially if employees are still working from home, social distancing, or however they’re managing to produce these anime.

So, episode count.. 12?

The main reason I have a hard time grasping the idea of another 12ep season at all is because.. I don’t know where it’ll be a decent place for it to stop?

S1 ending at ch37 with the kids escaping? Perfect. You can’t question that decision. But now? When a whole bunch of craziness is about happen? How do you choose another perfect moment to end a season with?

No matter how many anime original scenes they have planned for the demon forest, I believe we’ll at least reach B06-32, which will get us to ch52.

Could they go farther? Sure. Perhaps ending at ch59-60? It would leave us off with Emma & Ray leaving the comfort of the shelter to follow Yuugo into yet another demon infested forest, much like how S1 left off, as the escapees left their once safe, comfortable life into the unknown world.

Or end at ch64? After Emma gets snatched by the poachers? It could work. It would certainly leave everyone wanting more, especially us manga readers because goddamn the GP arc would be SO close!

Perhaps ch74 after seeing Norman alive? Just so it’s not a big darn secret anymore to those who are going into this season blind? (how do people manage to stay anime only? i’m not trying to make anyone feel bad.. i’m just impressed? i caught up to the manga right after s1 because i didn’t have the self control to wait!)

Ending on that chapter would be so bittersweet to me.. because you know what appears in ch75 and it’s literally one of the only things I care about.

S2 preview trailers already teased some of the demon forest scenes I’m most excited about, so the only things left that will truly excite me are Yuugo and that darn outfit. (seriously, whenever we do get to see emma in her gp outfit for the first time, someone better scream at me so i can die from happiness.)

Okay, and all the GP kids too.. especially their trio!

Could they fit the Goldy Pond arc into a 12 episode season along with every other event that came before it? I.. seriously hope not?

Compared to s1, which was very dialogue heavy, GP is about as action packed as we’re gonna get in the near future, and those scenes are going to fly by once they get put into motion.

Quick example (because it was recent and i can’t think of something else atm): the Overhaul arc from My Hero Academia. Off the top my head it was about 40 total ch? That arc took up half of the show’s S4, which was a total 25 eps.

So with the GP ending at ch96, it’ll give us about 20-30 chapters (depending on where you personally see the start of this arc I guess? once yuugo leads the duo through the forest, when emma gets snatched or when the battle actually starts)

If GP were to happen in s2 where there’s 12 episodes.. literally everything would be so fast paced and I don’t want them to rush anything or leave stuff out?

Other options?

It’s very wishful thinking and I would be getting my hopes up for nothing, because I know it won’t happen, but I could possibly see them fitting GP arc if S2 was made up of 18eps?

6 eps for the demon forest, 6 for Goldy pPond, the remaining 6 to accommodate B06-32, Cuvitidala and any other anime original scenes as they wish.

Although fitting about 64 chapters into 12-18 episodes sounds a bit much.. but not really? I seriously have no idea at this point how much story we’re going to cover this season.

Could I perhaps place all my hopes towards a second cour later this year? Like for the summer.. or would I be expecting too much?

This all could’ve been avoided if they just tell us! Seriously, I’ve been thinking about episode count since last year.. and now you have to deal with this mindless chatter of mine.

I’d honestly be okay with another 12ep season though. We waited this long that I’ll just be excited to see all the children again.

Anime-only scenes:

Those 3 days the children spent learning from our demon friends? Yes please! Did you know Emma not only learned how to use a bow and arrow but a freakin’ harpoon as well? Like.. hello?? I must see this!

Perhaps they’ll even adopt some of the extra pages from some of the chapters, like they did in S1 with the flashback of Norman being sick in ep10.

I know this will be such a high hope, but I remember in ch177 how Emma claims that after they escaped, they all remembered how kind Isabella really was, so if they decide to adapt the extras from ch41-42 & ch45, I’ll cry.

And these pages? Cloverworks, please..

I’m literally begging here..

Especially these two! Even though I still doubt we’ll reach Goldy Pond if we get 12eps.. but in the future! Please!

Other random nonsense:

I may or may not get emotional upon seeing Isabella at the very start when she goes to confront Grandma Sarah. If her hair is kept down as it was at the end of S1 then I’ll give the anime staff my sincere thanks.

We only heard 15 seconds of “Identity” and yet it has been living in my head rent free ever since that trailer dropped. I need to hear the full song sooo damn badly, y’all have no idea.

Here’s hoping they don’t cut out the inner monologues again. At this moment I don’t remember any specific ones from the demon forest I want to see but I’m sure they’re present.

I’m ready to die at every cute Chris moment they give us.. and this entire scene where the kids scold Ray.

Literally every scene with Emma & Ray. They’re my top 2 favorites from this series okay? Of course I’m going to fangirl over them. (they already showed the hug in one of the trailers and i damn near cried)

If we see him, (which i’m sure we will, but i still have tiny some doubts) I hope they give Yuugo a fantastic voice actor.

Also, his nicknames for everyone!! Literally everything about that man I’m hyped for.

Again, very doubtful we’ll get GP in a 12ep season, but whenever that arc decides to grace us with its presence, “63194” better play on full blast when ch92-93 gets animated.

Speaking of music, while I’m completely excited to hear the new OST that Obata has in store for us (thank god he’s doing this season again btw!), I hope we hear some of those unused tracks from the first season, specifically “Their Own Thoughts.”

Every time Emma mentions their future, their goals or how her family will always be together, I’ll cry. (thanks demon god and your stupid reward)

Yes I’ll be doing those reaction posts (if you follow me i’m sure you’ve seen them by now) after every new episode as I do with other series I watch.. once I survive the usual long day at work, avoiding anything TPN related so I can watch in peace and quiet when I finally get home.. damn it, im already so anxious, help.

#the promised neverland #chidoroki used chatter

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silverlightqueen · 4 years

Text

part sixteen - disguise

thunderstorm🌩 - (mafia!jk x dancer!yn, smau, - fluff, crack, angst, potential smut)

rating: pg | warnings: mention of murder

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a/n: another written part guys !! lmk what y’all think of this part and hmu if you wanna be on the taglist. stay safe and be careful in these uncertain and scary times, and my ask box is always open if any of you need someone to talk to ! x

PSA: ASK MY MUSE IS NOW OPEN FOR ALL OF MY STORIES TO ENTERTAIN ME DURING THIS LOCKDOWN/QUARANTINE/SELF-ISOLATION THING (THAT ALL OF YOU SHOULD BE DOING, STAY IN YOUR MOTHERFUCKING HOUSES) SO ASK MY MUSES SOME QUESTIONS PLEASE I’M BEGGING Y’ALL

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‘Now who’s wearing a stupid disguise?’ he mutters as he holds the door open for me, and I shush him, looking around quickly before ducking through the door into the dingy reception again. ‘Why… why are you sneaking around? Shouldn’t you be at home, resting?’ Jungkook says, and I sigh. ‘Can we go upstairs?’ I ask, and he nods, looking confused. ‘Sure,’ he says, both of us heading over to the lift. We go up in silence, and my stomach turns the entire time. When we reach the 21st floor, I take Rosé’s phone out of my pocket and hold it up to him with a finger over my lips, and he raises an eyebrow. I mouth the words, ‘have you got a signal blocker box?’ and he nods, leading me over to his desk. He roots around the drawers for a second, putting both his and Rosé’s phones into the box, sealing it. I take the box from it and move it a few desks away, just for good measure.

‘What’s all the secrecy for? Are you paranoid someone’s listening in on you?’ he asks, and I shake my head. ‘You don’t the half of it. This is serious, okay? So prepare yourself for what I’m about to tell you. Because you might get angry at me, but hear me out and let me explain the full story before you speak,’ I say, nearly all in one breath, and he looks even more confused now, raising an eyebrow. ‘Is this a really elaborate joke you’ve planned? Because I know what you’re like and I swear to god, y/n, I will not b-’ ‘I’m not kidding, JK. I wouldn’t leave the house two days after being shot for a joke,’ I cut him off, and I think he senses the seriousness and fear in my voice, because he nods, taking a seat, and I perch on the desk beside him, taking my mask and bucket hat off. I take a deep breath, looking out of the window to calm myself. The night sky looks beautiful, a deep velvet blue twinkling with bright stars, and when I look back at Jungkook, I can see the same stars in his eyes, the eyes that are trained on me. He’s leaning back in his chair, legs slightly spread, and his arms are folded across his chest, fluffy hair falling down over his forehead. He’s dressed in all black, loose enough to be comfortable but form-fitting enough to show me the perfect proportions of his body. He really is beautiful, even in such low light. I try to stop the butterflies in my stomach, knowing there’re more important matters at hand.

‘I’m part of YG’s gang,’ I blurt out, and he continues just staring at me for a moment, before a frown takes over his beautiful features. ‘That’s not funny, y/n. How the hell do you know who YG is?’ he asks, and I sigh. ‘He’s my boss. I’m being serious, JK. I’m part of his gang,’ I say tiredly, and Jungkook rises out of his chair, pacing. ‘No, y/n, I swear to god, this isn’t funny, and I will not be happy if you’re telling me the truth,’ he says, voice shaking, and I feel tears beginning to collect in my eyes. ‘I’m telling you the truth, I promise,’ I whisper, and he freezes, looking at me with wild eyes. ‘Show me your tattoo,’ he says, and I nod, getting up carefully. I lift up the side of my top and pull my bra out of the way, showing him the black ink in the shape of a Y. ‘Everyone else has it on their forearm, but I had to have it somewhere where no one would see it in dance auditions,’ I explain shakily, and he stares at the tattoo, as though checking if it’s going to disappear before his eyes.

‘y/n, this… this changes everything. That means…’ he trails off, eyes locked with mine in an intense gaze. ‘I know you’re our rivals,’ I confirm, and he turns away from me with a groan, head in his hands, and my heart hurts. ‘You knew all along,’ he whispers, before whirling back to look at me, rage in his face. ‘You knew all along,’ he repeats, tone accusatory, and I shake my head. ‘I swear, I didn’t know, JK. I promise,’ I say, able to hear the desperation in my own voice, and he looks torn. ‘Explain the full story,’ he says in a strangled voice, sitting back down. His disposition is completely different compared to how relaxed he was a few moments ago, tension in his entire body as he leans forward, elbows on his knees and head resting in his hands.

‘When I was 16, I decided I wanted to pursue dance. My parents were completely against it, my whole family was. But my friends, they were so supportive. The girls, but also some other friends that I had. They were a little older, and no one knew that I was friends with them, not even the girls – we weren’t that close back then. They were a little sketchy, I guess, but they looked after me. When they found out that I wanted to move into the city to join a dance school, they urged me to do so, but we all knew I wouldn’t be able to afford it without my parents’ help, and they never would’ve helped.

But they knew a guy. They worked for him, and they told me he’d be able to give me a job that would pay really well. So I met this guy, who turned out to be YG. We had a meeting at this restaurant, the nicest restaurant I’d ever been to, and I instantly felt myself gravitate to him. He was kind, and funny, and he listened to me, when no adult ever had. Yes, he was double my age, but we got along. He was like a big brother to me. By the end of our meeting, he’d decided he wanted to offer me a job, and all the training alongside it, and it would pay enough for me to go to the dance school, live in the city, with plenty left over. I took the job, because I was so desperate to follow my dreams, to be a dancer. I told everyone I’d been offered a scholarship by the National School of Dance, who would pay for my accommodation, my education, and then some for living costs. In reality, I ended up living in YG’s own house – it was huge, loads of us lived there – and he was the one who was paying for school.

We started training as soon as I moved into the house, so I was training and dancing at the same time. But I loved it – both the dancing and the training. After a few weeks of intensive training with YG himself – not many people get that privilege – I was his little killing machine. Over the years, I worked my way up the gang, and worked my way up the class at school. Because the training was helping with dance, and the dancing was helping with… my abilities to kill. And YG and I grew closer and closer. When I turned 18, he bought me my own car and my own apartment, even though I spent all my time at his house anyway. I loved it, being in that gang. I even developed my own little killing technique – seduction, to get them alone, and then I’d either slit their throat, choke them, break their neck, blow their brains out. I was killing all these people, hundreds, maybe even thousands, and I felt no remorse, because they were bad people, and I like to do the right thing. Being so young had allowed him to warp my mind so much so that I didn’t see that it was all so wrong. I was losing contact with everyone at home, and becoming more and more integrated into the gang. I was the youngest, and one of the few girls, so they all adored me. It was like one big family. But I don’t need to tell you that, you know what it’s like.

When I was around 19, Jisoo moved into the city, and asked to visit me. We met up, and she told me that the other four were planning to move to the city too, and they were going to buy an apartment together, and would I want to join them. I refused, but YG told me to move in with them, to maintain some kind of relationships outside of the gang. He might be a terrible person, but he cared about me, always looked out for me and wanted what was best for me. So I moved in with them, and I had to act like I was broke, because they wouldn’t understand where all my money was coming from. I also told them I was working part time as a maid, which explained away all the time I was out of the house when I wasn’t at school.

Around the same time as me moving in with the girls, you guys moved into the city. And he hated it. Every time I saw him, he’d just be ranting about Solji – it was all he ever talked about. It was eating him up. And that was reflected in the gang. Suddenly, we weren’t these vigilantes that were killing bad people anymore. We were just as bad as all of the others. We weren’t protecting the streets; we were the one the streets needed protecting from. And the longer it went on, the more and more I hated it. I stopped enjoying the work I was doing for him. So I asked for eight months off, to focus on dance, and he was reluctant at first. I practically begged him, said I’d give up my car, and told him he could pause my pay, and he eventually agreed. That was around five months ago.

I told the girls that the family I was working for were moving abroad and, not long after, a job opened up at Lisa’s shop. She offered it to me, and it was perfect. Then I was added to your guys group chat, and I promise you, I didn’t know who you were. I only found out the other day when I met Solji, and you guys explained the story of how you became boss. Obviously, having taken time off, I didn’t know that leadership had changed, so that’s why I didn’t recognise your name. When I found out, I texted YG and asked him if he was behind me being added to group chat, and he said he was. And then he told me that he never intended to let me take eight months off, and thought he’d use me to bring you guys down from the inside. I swear, JK, I never knew.’

He listens to my explanation, not reacting to anything, just listening, and once I finish, he sits back in his chair, sighing. ‘I believe you,’ he says, and I feel hope burst in my chest. ‘Really?’ I ask, and he nods gravely. ‘I do. But I have a few questions. How on earth did he manage to get your number added to the group chat?’ he asks, and I shrug. ‘I have no idea. Who was it you were supposed to add?’ ‘Chou Tzuyu. She was our new recruit and she moved in with us, so I told Tae to add her into the group chat. When we realised that it was the wrong number, we asked Tzuyu what her actual number was, and it was completely different to yours. And then she told us she never even gave us her phone number, so I literally have no idea where yours came from,’ he explains, and I frown. ‘That’s really weird. I don’t know how he managed to pull that off,’ I say, trying to rack my brains, wondering how he could’ve possibly had me added.

‘Anyway. Why were you shot? Lisa told me it was a robbery, but then when I showed up to the hospital and YG’s men were outside of your room, I texted him-’ ‘You have his number?’ I demand, and he nods frustratedly. ‘That’s not important. Anyway, I texted him, and he made out like he was planning to kill you,’ he says, and my eyes widen. ‘What? Why?’ ‘Because his men saw me picking you up from the club and assumed you were ‘my weakness’, or whatever, something like that,’ he says, drawing quote marks with his fingers, ‘and that I’d better watch my back, and watch yours too. I guess it was just a ploy to panic me.’ ‘Yeah, it was. He’s good at manipulating people, and playing mind games. But it was this lady whose husband I killed that shot me. She recognised me as his killer,’ I explain, and he nods, completely unfazed by the mention of me murdering someone. He’s used to it, I guess.

‘So, hang on. Was Dalgom really ill, or was that just a distraction so Jennie could pick you up?’ he asks, and I laugh embarrassedly, trying to avoid his irritated glare. ‘Um, yeah. It was a distraction. Sorry,’ I say sheepishly, and he rolls his eyes. ‘I was genuinely worried about him. Jennie and Jisoo even posted about him on their instantgrams!’ he exclaims, and I stifle a laugh. ‘Instagram. Not instantgram,’ I correct, and he rolls his eyes again. ‘Same thing. And don’t call me a boomer, please, we’re practically the same age,’ he says, eyes twinkling with laughter, and I giggle behind my hand. Giggle? Since when do I giggle? ‘Do the girls still not know you’re part of a gang?’ he asks, and I shake my head. ‘No, and they can’t. I don’t want to put them in danger. And YG has my phone bugged, meaning he’s probably got the apartment bugged too, somehow. Which is why I couldn’t text you anything. And he’s having me followed, which is why I came in disguise. Jennie and Jisoo wear this kind of stuff all the time, and I never do. He cannot find out I’ve met with you, or he’ll kill me. Or he’ll kill one of the girls,’ I say, shuddering at the thought, and he nods gravely.

‘What does he want you to do then? Obviously there’s a reason you’re still on the group chat acting like everything’s normal,’ he says, and I sigh, nervous about telling him this part. ‘He… wants me to take you guys down. For good. He wants you all dead, and he wants me to be the one that does it,’ I say tiredly, and JK shakes his head disgustedly. ‘He’s sick, absolutely sick in the head. Using your emotions against you, making you form relationships with people before forcing you to kill them,’ he spits, and I’m surprised at how passionate he sounds. ‘I know. But… I’m scared, JK. Really scared,’ I say, feeling tears come to my eyes at how vulnerable and young I sound. He looks up at me with wide eyes, and he shakes his head. ‘No, y/n, you don’t need to be scared,’ he says softly, getting up from his seat, and I feel a tear begin to fall down my face. ‘But I am. I don’t care about him killing me, I couldn’t care less. But he’s threatened to kill the girls if I don’t kill you guys, and he said he’ll kill you all anyway. I don’t want to lose them, and I don’t want to lose any of you, but I don’t understand what I’m supposed to do,’ I sob, tears now running down my face, JK watching and listening to me intently as I speak.

And then he takes me by surprise. He takes a step closer to me and wraps his arms around me, one hand coming to rest on the back of my head, and I cry even harder, burying my face into his chest. He strokes my hair as I cry, holding me in a tight and comforting grip, the smell of his flooding my senses (a clean laundry smell mixed with a subtle fragrance – something fruity and floral, but soft and sweet). I can feel the hard contours of his body against me and despite him having muscles for days, he’s so soft and warm. He makes me feel safe. Once I’ve calmed down, I move away from him and he releases his grip on me. He raises a hand and gently wipes the tears from my face, a small smile on his face. And then I watch as his eyes flit to my lips. My heart pounds as he looks back up to meet my eyes, and my stomach flips at the smirk he gives me. I gulp, and he notices it, his smirk growing even wider, before his face moves slightly closer to mine.

He’s going to kiss me. My eyes flutter shut. And I’m going to let him.

There’s moment when I think of all the stupid things he’s said on the group chat. How mean he was at the start. How much of a boomer he was (and still is). How he eventually warmed to me, became so protective of me. How much he must care for me. And how much I care for him.

I feel his lips brush against mine before he pulls away, obviously checking if I’m okay with this and, without opening my eyes, I lean towards him. He chuckles, pressing his lips to mine, more forcefully this time, and it’s like fireworks are exploding behind my eyes, my mind numbing and my body tingling at the feeling of him kissing me.

He pulls away before the kiss becomes heated, both of us blinking as though we’ve just woken up, and a small smile appears on his face. ‘There’ll be plenty of time for that after we follow my plan,’ he says, and my heart jumps at him saying he’d kiss me again. ‘You have a plan?’ I ask, and he scoffs, grinning. ‘Of course I have a plan. There’s no need for you to be scared, because I won’t let him lay a finger on me, on any of my staff, on any of the girls, and certainly not on you,’ he says, my heart fluttering at how… serious and commanding he sounds. ‘What are you going to do?’ I ask, and he grins even wider. ‘We, my dear,’ he says, his eyes twinkling as he speaks, ‘are going to kill YG.’

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let-me-write-shit · 4 years

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Somebody To You: 17

Friendly reminder to please Like and/or Reblog. It helps more than you think! :)

A/N: A MASSIVE shoutout and credit to this dream of a person, @nnevrmind, who not only gave me ALL of the information on Rome and the historical significance of the places mentioned (and also made me want to visit Rome even MORE now), but also inspired a large chunk of this chapter and upcoming chapters. You’re an actual angel and I’m SOOO appreciative of you reaching out and helping me with this! Thank you thank you thank you!! :) <3

Word Count: 3,861

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CHAPTER SEVENTEEN:

Sleep had never been so comfortable before, which was unheard of for Zoey when she was in a bed that was not her own. She almost thought the whole trip to Italy was a dream. But as she stretched and fluttered her eyes open, a smile spread across her face, looking passed the white canopy that surrounded her bed through the window that overlooked the beautiful acreage of property that the sun shone down on. She wished that she could blink and have this image ingrained in her mind forever.

Zoey’s phone had automatically adjusted to Rome time, seeing that it was only 7 AM. Her hair had dried after last night’s shower, so she put it in a simple low messy bun, pulling strands of hair out to frame her face and heading downstairs to see if anyone else had woken up yet, deciding not to change or put makeup on as she didn’t know the plans for today.

The first person she ran into was Nancy who’s voluminous curly dark hair was messy and diffused on her head. She sat cross-legged on a barstool at the kitchen island, still in her pajamas, eating a bowl of fruits.

“It’s early,” was all she managed, the sleep in her voice still evident.

Zoey snorted out a “morning,” when she heard smacking of feet against the tile behind her.

Harry came into view, grinning. His puffy eyes and cheeks made him look five years younger as his deep, raspy voice greeted them, followed by, “I thought I heard someone leave their room. I didn’t want to be the only one up. Coffee?” he offered.

“Please,” she nodded, allowing him to pass.

Zoey decided to step out onto the back terrace and take a seat at the couches by the firepit that was now laden with ash from last night’s fire. The view was incredible. It’s no wonder Italy is considered one of the most beautiful countries in the world. She couldn’t imagine ever getting bored with this. Harry had disrupted her thoughts, stepping out of the french doors that lead onto the stone slab and carefully making his way over with two mugs in hand.

“Thank you,” she grinned, taking hers and wrapping her hands around it while he sat beside her.

Harry nodded, placing his arm on the armrest and looking out at the garden, “Incredible, right?”

“I can’t believe people get to live here.”

He nodded, “That’s why it’s one of my favorite places to visit. Never gets old.”

It’s like he could read her mind. Why did he have to do that? Why did he have to make it so hard not to like him? Couldn’t he just be a creepy weirdo like most of the guys she knew? She turned to him, trying to force the thoughts away, and smiled, “You picked an amazing place to stay at. Thank you. It really is beautiful here. All the artwork and old detailing in the house. It makes you wonder how old it is and who all lived here.”

“Well, I had to make sure I picked a place with character,” Harry smirked, “Couldn’t have you come out here and stay at a place like my house in LA.”

She chuckled, only lightly checking his shoulder so as not to make him spill his coffee, “Well, at least I know you’ve got good taste.”

“In some things, I guess,” he turned to her, “I’m alright in vacations and music. Not so great in the girl department, am I?”

Zoey shrugged, “I don’t know. I think you’re pretty good at picking them. You’re just not good at the follow-through.”

“How has she been?”

Zoey knew he meant Aurora. And her heart panged a little thinking he might still have feelings for her. She had noticed the occasional glances between each other last night, and although she wasn’t worried that Rory might make a move, Zoey couldn’t help but wonder if there was still a spark between them or if they regret ending things. Still, he didn’t know about Aurora and Brett, and she’d rather he found out by her than in passing in case he did still care for Aurora and was hurt by being caught off guard.

“She seems alright. Brett asked her to be his girlfriend.”

“Oh. So they’re dating?” Harry asked, earning a nod from Zoey.

Her eyes lingered on him, unblinking, waiting for a reaction. And hearing those words hurt, but not because Rory was taken now. He was happy for her, genuinely. But it hurt because it was so easy for someone else to do what he couldn’t seem to do. It took no time at all for Brett to figure out that he liked Aurora enough to make it official. This wasn’t the first time this has happened to Harry. In fact, there were several instances where Harry was too afraid to commit that he got beat out by someone else. When would he learn?

Harry nodded, “Good for them. He seems alright.”

Zoey snorted, rolling her eyes, “Just last week you were calling him a...what was it? Little bitch?”

Harry smirked, taking a sip of his still-hot coffee, “I was in a bad mood.”

“Uh-huh.”

“Besides,” Harry shrugged, looking out at the view again, “Maybe the guys are right. Maybe I need to branch out more. I always go after the same type of girls. Maybe I should see what else is out there. Try something new.”

“Uh...hello? I’ve been saying that, too! I mean, there’s no shame in going after the same kind of girls. You like what you like. But it doesn’t hurt to venture. I’ve found it to be fun.”

“Yeah, I know all the fun you’ve had! Mama’s boys, virgins, and guys that are stuck on their exes. Tell me again how venturing has been doing for you?” Harry teased.

“Not fair. Just because I haven’t had any luck doesn’t mean I haven’t had fun doing it. Plus, I’ve gotten free food out of it, so it’s not all a loss.”

Harry laughed before turning to look at her, a smile hidden behind her coffee mug as she took a gentle sip, looking back out at the fields. The sun made her navy eyes look brighter and gave her a skin a soft glow. She brushed the strands of hair that framed her face out of the way and turned to look at him with a hesitant grin when she noticed he was already looking at her.

“What?” she asked, self consciously.

Harry shook his head, trying his best to sound flippant, “Nothing. Just thinking about how my friends keep joking around saying I should date you.”

He noticed Zoey’s cheeks began to blush as she forced a laugh, sarcastically saying, “Could you imagine? Talk about not your type.”

Harry let out a chuckle, a little staggered by how put-off she sounded, “Isn’t that the point? To date someone who’s not my type?”

Zoey paused, staring at him, her eyebrows starting to furrow as she stuttered, “Wait, I’m confused. Are you asking me to go on a date with you?”

His heart started pounding nervously and a hole formed in the pit of his stomach when he thought he noticed a hint of discomfort in her face. Quickly he stammered, “No! No that’d be weird. I was just saying...nevermind.”

“Well, damn, you didn’t have to sound so disgusted,” she chuntered.

“No, I’m not disgusted. It’s just-” he rambled before noticing the amused smile on her face and realized she was joking. They both let out a laugh and Harry relaxed saying, “We should wake everyone up. We need to get going soon.”

The two recruited Nancy to help, and as they attempted to wake Andy, Aurora, and Katie, Harry couldn’t help but replay their conversation over and over in his head. Was she weirded out at the idea of them dating? Was that really an expression of discomfort on her face or was it something else? He couldn’t recall hearing a tone of annoyance. Maybe she wasn’t completely uninterested.

What if they did go on a date and it turned out to be awkward or bad? Would it ruin their friendship? He didn’t think he could handle losing her. But what if it went well? What if it was the best date he’s ever been on? What if they actually started dating? He’d always wanted to bring her back home to England one day to meet his friends and family. What if he introduced her as his girlfriend? Surely he wouldn’t hear the end of it from his friends. He could hear the endless amounts of ‘I told you so’ now.

No, he couldn’t. That’s too weird. They’re best friends. Besides, he practically dated her roommate who is here with them now. Even if Aurora is dating Brett now, how weird would it be to hook up with Zoey on this trip with his ex-fling only feet away? Pretty fucked up.

Over a quick breakfast, Harry explained the plans. He had hired a guide to take them on a tour around Rome for the day. It would be as private as they could manage, as the company was made aware that Harry would be there and they did their best to arrange accommodations so that he could be in attendance without worrying about being hounded, though there was only so much they could do with high-tourist attractions, especially outdoors. He had explained to them to make sure they wore clothes that covered their shoulders and knees in case they visited any holy places to show respect and to make sure they wore comfortable shoes.

As soon as everyone had finished getting dressed, they all piled into the SUV and headed towards the colosseum where they were lucky enough to find a car park nearby. The group walked the rest of the way, Harry walking in the lead with Nancy while Aurora talked to Katie, and Andy and Zoey linked arms together in the back. They circled the Colosseum until Harry saw a tall, tanned, long, dark-haired man wearing a red lanyard, his muscles popping through his tight, light blue button-up.

“Please tell me that’s our tour guide,” Andy muttered, looking him up and down, causing the girls to laugh.

“Buongiorno!” the man called out, shaking hands with Harry first, before greeting everyone else. “Ciao. It’s so nice to meet you all. My name is Marco,” he introduced himself before getting everyone else’s name, “I hear you’ve come to Italy to celebrate someone’s birthday?” Everyone turned to Zoey, pulling her forward and she blushed at the attention. Marco smiled and she got a good look at his perfect teeth and beautiful brown eyes as he said, “Ah, Zoey, right? When is your birthday?”

“Tomorrow,” she said, holding his gaze.

He lowered his voice, a slight smirk appearing on his face, “Well, happy almost birthday to you, then. You stay by me while I show you around. Front row seat to the show,” he winked, earning a smile and a nod from Zoey. If Jess were here to see this she’d shit her pants.

As Marco explained the process of the tour to the group, Zoey caught Andy’s eyes who mouthed, “OH MY GOD!” to which Zoey mouthed back, “I KNOW!” making her little sister giggle.

Eventually they followed Marco, with Zoey by his side, past a long line of waiting people and into the colosseum where he told them all about its history as an amphitheater that not only held gladiator and wild animal fights but also could be filled with water to hold mock naval battles.

Marco talked with such passion and enthusiasm that it was hard not to be interested. Harry snuck a peek at Zoey as they roamed and smiled as she scanned all around with such wonder. He could tell she was really taking in the scene and the information, completely invested in learning more about the history.

It wasn’t until they were finishing up at the colosseum when someone had recognized Harry. He gave a quick grin and waved at the passing girl, ducking his head a little more as they made their way on over to the Forum, which was just next door. Marco did his best to inform them of the old marketplace, but the group became increasingly more interested in the Italian tour guide, interrupting frequently to ask more about himself, which he didn’t seem to mind. In fact, he seemed to get enjoyment out of it.

“Please tell us you’re single, Marco,” Andy boldly said, looking him up and down behind his glasses that sat perched on the tip of his nose.

Marco laughed and nodded, “Yes, I am single. What about you all? Has anyone here found their soulmate?”

Harry felt a nervous pit in his stomach when Zoey snapped her attention to him with a playful wink and he jokingly rolled his eyes at her before Nancy spoke, “Oh, honey. We can all be single if you want us to be.”

To which Rory coughed, “Except me. I’m the only one taken.”

“You have your pick,” Andy flirted.

“We don’t pick women here in Italy,” Marco laughed again and side-eyed Zoey before turning to her and saying, “but maybe the birthday girl was brought here for a reason.”

Harry watched as Zoey’s eyes widened, blushing, and trying to hide a smile while her friends all whistled at them. Annoyance began to sink in. Why was it that Zoey was always getting hit on? Zoey hardly said a word outside of asking more information on the history of the ancient architecture they visited, why the interest in her? Nancy was practically a model in her own right and Marco clearly got a kick out of her considering the number of times she made him laugh throughout the tour so far. Couldn’t he have gone for her?

“What’s next on our stop?” Harry interrupted, changing the subject.

As they made their ten-minute walk to the Trevi Fountain, their last stop before lunch, Katie and Zoey held hands, talking inaudibly with Marco while Andy and Nancy were behind them confessing their attraction towards their tour guide. Harry and Rory dragged in the back, trying their best to avoid eye contact with passerby’s in case anyone noticed them.

“Think she’ll get his number before we leave?” Rory whispered to him, nodding towards Zoey.

Harry shrugged, “Doubt it. We’re only here for the week.”

“I don’t know. You know her, wanting to be more adventurous and all that. What’s more adventurous than a fling with a hot Italian guy?”

“Skydiving,” Harry said simply.

Aurora laughed, looking over at Harry. But when she noticed he wasn’t joking, her smile faltered, eyeing him a little longer than usual before shaking her head, “Well, we’ll see. Maybe she won’t. Either way, she’s having a great time. I’ve never seen her smile so much. She’s like a little kid in a candy shop. It’s so cute.”

“Yeah,” he nodded, finally grinning, “She’ll definitely remember this birthday.”

The Trevi Fountain was packed with people so they couldn’t stay long in fear of it getting too crazy around Harry, so Marco quickly went over facts and the legend.

“Turn your back to the fountain and with your right hand, throw a coin over your left shoulder. One coin means you’ll return to Rome. Two means you’ll return and fall in love. And three means you’ll return, fall in love, and marry. I’ve got a few coins here for you all,” he passed them each one coin and they all squealed, squeezing their way through the crowd to the very edge of the fountain.

Harry’s been here several times before, and for some reason, this was the part that always seemed to get to him. Out of the hundreds of beautiful buildings and ruins, the Trevi Fountain was always the spot that jerked at his heart. He was the first to throw the coin over his shoulder and stood back to watch the rest of his friends experience this moment. He laughed as Nancy and Zoey screamed at Andy, “Wrong shoulder, you idiot!” after he threw the coin over his right shoulder.

“Fuck! I panicked!” he shouted back.

He watched Zoey take a deep breath, close her eyes, and gently toss her shining coin over her left shoulder, turning just in time to see it ‘PLOP’ right in the water. He saw Marco step up closer to her brandishing another coin and heard him through the busy sounds of the plaza say, “One more. For the birthday girl. Maybe you’ll find love in Rome.”

He felt the heat rise in him, annoyed that Zoey was eating this up. And she wonders why she had such bad luck with guys. These are the type of men that she’s falling for. These typical sleazeballs.

“She better work,” Andy snapped, quietly cheering as she stood beside Harry, following everyone back through the crowd and towards the river to grab some lunch.

Harry had made a connection with the chef of a wonderful restaurant last time he was in town and was invited to bring his friends for a free lunch, to which he refused to not pay, but did kindly ask if it were possible to have private seating towards the back. The chef graciously agreed, sectioning off a spot for them in anticipation of their arrival.

Seeing the relationships Harry had made and the interaction between him and the wait staff made Zoey feel proud to know him. Every time she got to see him talk with a fan or someone that held him on any kind of pedestal always put into perspective for her how famous and admired he was. And to see him always be kind was no matter the circumstance was something that made her want to be a better person. She smiled, watching him converse, shake hands, and take pictures and videos with each worker that came up. He caught her looking and shot her a silly face, which only made her smile more. She was sure that this crush phase would be over at some point, but for now, she just loved the fact that this man was in her life.

Besides, at least there was Marco here to distract her for the day. A tall, smart, handsome Italian? Yes, please! He was very forward, which startled her at first, but once she got used to him she was able to have very nice conversations about interests and even family. He seemed to like how close she and Katie were, expressing that he had a younger brother around the same age whom he was close to.

“How about any older brothers?” Nancy joked, making them all laugh.

The lunch was incredible. She knew authentic pizza would be good, but she was guaranteed to dream about it for years to come. They all sang their praise and thanks to the chef before heading out. Zoey walked beside Marco, teaching them all about the Vatican, and made their way towards the museum. She took this time to look back at the group, seeing Harry and Aurora laughing with each other in the back. He looked happy. She couldn’t help but feel slightly jealous that it wasn’t her back there with him. It was silly to think he’d be over Rory just like that.

As soon as they got into the museum, her worries of Harry and Aurora seemed to float away as she became completely enthralled by the artwork that was displayed on the walls, the mosaics on the floor, and the sculptures that lined the perimeter. The Sistine Chapel was truly magnificent. Lined with Michaelangelo’s frescoes, you couldn’t help but get a little choked up. Nothing could even come close to describing the pure cultivated beauty.

But St. Peter's Basilica was even more wondrous, captivated by the enormity and grandeur of the church and its architecture. The way the light shone through the dome of the church, hitting the beautiful artwork surrounding. Zoey was speechless.

Marco explained, “According to an agreement between the Italian state and the Vatican, Rome cannot build a taller building than the chapel. It guarantees the chapel the most amazing view of all of Rome. But, to get to the top you must walk five hundred and fifty-one steps. There’s an elevator that takes you up almost halfway up to the first terrace, but you’ll have to climb the rest of the way. It’s worth it for the view. Would any of you be up for it?”

“I would,” Zoey immediately agreed, eager to see the view.

“I’ll go,” agreed Harry.

“Nah, my ass is not climbing five hundred steps,” Andy shook his head.

Nancy pouted, “I didn’t wear the right shoes. My feet are killing me.”

“I can take them wandering around and meet you back here in thirty minutes to an hour?” Rory suggested, earning nods from Marco, Harry, and Zoey where they broke off and began their climb.

Admittedly, it was tiring. The steps got tighter as they neared the end and they began to feel slightly claustrophobic from the walls seeming like they were leaning in on them. But by the time they reached the top and stepped out to take in the view they were sold. Marco was right, the climb was worth it. They gripped onto the railing, overlooking the city amongst the other visitors that were too distracted to notice them. Marco had run into a friend of his at the top and excused himself briefly to talk to him, but they were too enthralled to care.

“I cannot believe I’m here and get to see this,” Zoey breathed.

Harry turned to look at his friend who stared out at the view, captivated, with strands of hair flowing in the breeze. He grinned, “I’m glad you’re enjoying it.”

“You don’t understand,” she turned to look at him, almost teary-eyed, “People like me and my sister? We don’t get to go to Italy. We would have never been able to come here if it weren’t for you.”

She was always so genuine and grateful for everything she was given. Even if it was as simple as someone grabbing her a spoon. She must have thanked him over a dozen times for this trip already and it hasn’t even been twenty-four hours. Zoey stared at him and he was at a loss for words, unable to break his attention from her navy blue eyes.

Finally, he managed to build the strength to tease, mocking her, “...are we about to kiss right now?”

She laughed, looking back over the city, “I could kiss you right now.”

He swallowed, frozen, staring at the shape of her plump lips, forced to imagine how soft they might be or what kind of kisser she was. Was it sloppy? Stiff? Calculated? How did she taste? Surely she still had a hint of sauce and cheese in her breath after the pizza they just ate. He wouldn’t mind.

Shit. Maybe his friends were right.

KEEP READING

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Taglist for Somebody To You:

@thurhomish , @stilljosiegrossie , @odetostep , @apples2019 , @stylesmioamore

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scarletmelody · 4 years

Text

Queenstrial - Chapter 3

Masterlist

warnings: language

semi-modern AU

Summary: Mare Barrow’s only wish is for true freedom. But all that’s taken away from her when a gods damned letter shows up on her doorstep. Gone is the hope for a life of happiness. Instead, she’s been chosen to enter the 50th Queenstrial competition to win Prince Tiberias the VII’s hand in marriage. But not only is the Prince she’s expected to win, not a stranger at all, but rather her previous one night stand, but now she’s competing against 20 other cutthroat women for his love and affections she’s not even sure she wants.

...

I want to disappear. I want to combust in a thousand pieces never to be seen again. Because in this moment the only thing left in my head is that I need to leave. Oh my gods. I need to get out. I think the world is collapsing beneath my feet as I can’t even bear to stand. My legs start shaking under me and I can hardly breathe.

And his fucking eyes. They pour endlessly into my own and I know that he remembers me. His face is stunned into the same expression currently on my own. Utter shock. How he can stand there and emotionless while I’m feeling like I’m in utter hell is beyond me.

Cal has enough composure to avert his gaze before anyone else notices that the prince and one of his Queenstrial contestants know each other. Especially under our less than ideal circumstances. But while he looks away, my heart fucking drops. This might take a win for the worst day of my life.

I continue staring at Cal while he smoothly pretends that nothing wrong is happening. And then he starts speaking. In that familiar voice that I can remember hearing last night. Although in an entirely inappropriate context.

“Hello everyone, my family and I are very excited to have you all here with us for my Queenstrial. I’ve been looking forward to this moment for a long while and I hope that this will be the start to an amazing journey for all of us.” I scoff. Amazing my ass. “…but before we get started today, your maids will escort you all to your rooms where you’ll find all the necessary necessities you’ll need waiting for you. If anything’s not to your liking don’t hesitate to let them know. Afterwards you’ll be brought down to the dining room and we’ll dine together” he says with an annoyingly dazzling white smile.

Gods. He’s a fucking silver. That’s one option I didn’t even consider last night. Fuck. I feel so utterly stupid. Everything about him makes me want to punch his unfairly perfect face. I’m almost bursting with anger. Red is the only thing that comes to mind. And yet part of me knows that I’m being stupid. Stupid for being angry because it’s not his fault I’m in this situation.

I watch as he turns and exits the room in his impossibly sharp form fitting black suit that shows off that toned body of his I had to privilege of eying only hours before, his uncle following him. Walsh breaks my stare as she grips my hand and drags me towards the opposite end of the room where another grand staircase awaits us.

“This way Mare”, she says ushering me towards it.

I roll my eyes as I let her escort me up the stairs with the other ladies although I do notice a few walking as far away from their maids as possible. And of course, they’re all silver. What a pain it must be to even touch a red for them, being all high and mighty.

When the staircase splits into 4 different sections, we take the one to the left side, with Nina apparently having been selected to have a room in the same wing of the castle.

She smiles at me as her maid walks with her as well, before she reaches her room a few doors across from my own and waves goodbye as she’s whisked past her door.

My room is apparently a fucking castle of its own. At least to me. The floor to ceiling windows on the opposite side bring in the natural lighting with the most stunning view of the lush green gardens I have ever seen. Accompanied by a plain dresser, and two doors that I assume lead to a bathroom and close, I almost can’t believe that this room is my accommodation. Although the aesthetic of it is nothing compared to the bed. Because it’s gigantic.

I almost want to reach out and lay on it because it looks like a cloud. And just when I reach out and my fingers skim the edge of the sheets feeling its soft silky texture, Walsh slaps my hand away.

“What- “

“Mare, we don’t have time for ogling eyes at the bed for god sakes! We only have so little time before dinner and I want you to make a good impression!”

Glancing at the clock I respond exasperatedly, “Walsh we literally have an hour”

“You think that’s enough time?” she smirks, looking me up and down.

I feign a gasp of offense. “Really? I thought I looked damn good.”

She rolls her eyes. “Sorry Mare, but I’m going to make you look more than ‘good’. By the time I’m done, you’ll be drop dead gorgeous.”

…

Fuck she was right.

Because by the time she finished I look amazing. Better than I’ve ever looked in my entire life.

She lets me continue to wear my dress, which I insisted on, but other than that I’m completely revamped. I no longer look like an ordinary girl from the stilts, but now I’m completely transformed.

My hair is now done in voluminous soft curls that makes my generic long brown hair with graying ends flow elegantly down my back. A layer of foundation makes the blemishes I didn’t even know I had virtually disappear. But all that is nothing compared to the light bronze eyeshadow look that accompanies my own tan skin from hours spent in the sun along with the perfectly rosy pink lip gloss.

It’s so utterly flawless that I want to cry. I don’t deserve any of this. I don’t want any of it. But I have to. For my family, I remind myself. But it makes me feel sick. I’m currently sitting in luxury while my family is still struggling to survive.

Shaking my head, I quietly tell Walsh that she can leave and thank her for making me look so beautiful. She just nods as if she knows what exactly is going on in my head and walks out telling me to meet her downstairs in 5 minutes.

Once she shuts the door behind her, I walk to the bathroom in my room. Of course, just as I expect it’s massive. It houses a standalone tub in the corner with the same view of the gardens and a glass door shower next to it. But I move towards the white porcelain sink with a giant mirror above it and stare at my own reflection. Looking at my appearance it’s as if I can’t even recognize myself. Underneath all that makeup and clothing, who am I?

The only answer I can come up with is that I’m just Mare. A stupid foolish girl that decided to sleep with the Crown Prince of Norta who’s now expected to compete against 20 other girls for him to fall in love with her. Or at least choose her to marry. Stupid fucking Mare.

Allowing myself one moment of vulnerability I let myself release one tear before I angrily wipe it away. So Walsh doesn’t get mad at me for ruining all her hard work.

Quickly reaching into my bra, I reach for the set of emerald earrings that Kilorn gave me just this morning.

I punch the first one in without a second thought. The sting of it piercing my skin is almost a relief. At least I can feel something now. The second goes in quickly without another moment’s consideration.

The blood continues dripping for a minute before I wipe it away. Satisfied, I take a look at myself again, force a smile and try to ignore the fact that I know exactly who and where the purple marks on my neck and bruises on my legs covered by concealer are from. As I walk out the door to my room the only thing I think of is, ‘This is it. Time to pretend to be someone else’. Because that’s exactly what’s happening. Tonight, I’m no longer Mare Barrow.

Walking down the steps down from my wing of the castle I take my time because no matter how much I feign confidence I’m still nowhere near feeling as powerful as I feel. Because I’m still hiding from the truth. I’m going to be forced to face Cal. The only person I wanted to reach out to just this morning is now the only being I would rather burn in hell before facing.

When I meet Walsh downstairs where it appears I’m surprisingly not the last one, I smile and nod to her. She dips her head in response and I attempt to find Nina because well, she’s the only girl who’s talked to me so far.

Moving past the sea of bodies I scan the crowd for her eyeing the sea of heads for a familiar head of blond hair.

Ah, that’s her. I think to myself.

But just as I tap who I think is Nina on the shoulder, the person in question immediately flips around, her hair almost slapping me in the face.

Oh, shit. This is definitely not Nina.

Because this girl does not look like my kind and thoughtful almost-friend. No, she’s all ice. Her hair, which I now see is platinum blonde up close, swishes back and forth in her slick long ponytail and her charcoal black eyes sharpen as she stares right back at me. The two girls who were in conversation with her also turn around noticing their leader’s lapse in attention. Now all three of them glare at me.

Fuck.

“And who are you?” the platinum blond scoffs with an undeniable sense of superiority.

“Mare Barrow”, I respond trying my best to keep my dignity and pride although those two things are long gone by now.

“Well Mare Barrow, listen up” she continues, her perfectly manicured finger almost poking my eye out as she points it in my face. I almost feel the need to spit in her face.

But before she can finish her sentence which I assume had some vulgar words, a deep male voice behind me interrupts her. “Evangeline. Be nice.”

Oh. This is Evangeline. The girl that Walsh told me about. SHIT.

Turning around at my unexpected savior, I almost crash right into his chest. Moving my gaze up, my eyes widen realizing who exactly is in front of me.

It’s the fucking prince’s brother. Maven Calore.

“Hello”, he grins, staring down at me because even in these extremely tall heels I don’t push past 5’6 and he stands to be at least 5’10.

But before I can respond, he turns back to Evangeline. “Don’t you have something else to occupy your time with?”

She chooses to roll her eyes at him and giving me another scowl, before turning back to conversation with her two other lackeys.

“So…” he starts, continuing to look at me.

“Thank you” I quickly blurt out.

“Don’t mention it”, he grins, adding a wink. “Evangeline has been fucking up people’s lives for long enough, thought I’d return the favor.”

Interesting. For another Calore prince, this is not what I had in mind.

“I think you know my name already, but I didn’t quite manage to catch yours” he starts, interrupting my thoughts.

“Mare”

“I see. Well Mare, Maven Calore at your service. It was an honor to save you from Evangeline’s torment, and I would love to do it again”.

I chuckle at that. If we weren’t in this situation, him being a prince and me being a competitor in his brother’s Queenstrial, I think we could have been friends.

I avert my stare for a second to glance at the other girls in the room, but he catches me.

“That one’s Sonya Iral”, he begins, over my shoulder pointing to Evangeline’s brunette friend who’s currently speaking animatedly. Iral. So, she’s a silk.

“And the one next to her is Elane Haven.” Elane is the redhead who nods quietly as Sonya tells her story. Haven is another high house and she’s a shadow. That’s one to look out for.

“Over there, that’s Rohr Rhambos.” Rohr’s honey blond hair flows down her back as she stands in the corner of the room scrolling on her phone with a smirk. Although she does look a little like a mouse. It’s hard to believe she’s older than 17, seeing as she doesn’t a look a day past 12. But still, a strongarm.

Maven continues to point out a few of the other girls, but I only recognize a few of them. Heron Welle, a greenwarden, and Atara Viper, an animos. Deadly silver girls of more high houses.

My observances and Maven’s introductions are cut short however, when another bell rings and we both look up towards the end of the hallway where Julian Jacos once again stands.

“Apologies for the wait ladies”, he begins in his soft yet firm voice that reminds me of my teachers in school. “We’re ready for you, so please follow me.”

Maven grins at me as I turn around to face him. “Well Mare, let’s get your Queenstrial journey started” he tells me, holding out an arm for me.

I take it without a second thought. At least I have him; someone to guide me.

He leads me at the back of the pack currently beelining for the entrance to the dining room.

It’s at this point that I start a mental battle in my head again. Well, mostly it’s a string of curses. Fuck. I’m not ready.

But it’s too late because I’m already inside where everyone happens to already be finding their seats and I’m still standing there with Maven.

My eyes drag down to the end of the table first meeting the King’s and then Elara’s. The King’s eyes are bloodshot and I wouldn’t be surprised if he we’re almost blacked out drunk. But that’s still nothing compared to the ice blue stare of Elara’s gaze. Her blue eyes so similar to Maven’s eyeing me up and down, probably at my short dress so at odds compared to the more refined tastes of the other girls’.

I rip my eyes away before I bolt out of the room from fear. Unfortunately, I end up staring right at him instead.

Cal holds my gaze, a fierce determination present in his face before my mind starts to blank. I swear to god every time I look at him I can’t breathe. I can’t think.

Before I can succumb to my impulse to run far, far away, I force myself to take a deep breath, and move towards the only chair left which happens to be on the very far end from the table. Thankfully the farthest away from Cal.

I expect Maven to move down towards his expected seat towards the front with the rest of his family, but to my shock and horror he pulls another chair from the line of extras littering amongst the walls and drags it right up next to mine.

My face loses all of its color as he gives me a knowing smirk and finally sits down right next to me. Braving a glance at the rest of my table I think my stomach drops a flip and lands downwards. Because every single person at the table is staring. And definitely not nicely.

All of the girls glare daggers at me, enraged at the fact that I’ve already managed to sway one of the princes even though that couldn’t be farther from the truth. And at the head of the table the Queen is practically livid. She sharpens her gaze at Maven who rolls his eyes and shrugs. How anyone can have the audacity to perform those actions in front of a whisper is beyond me.

The King doesn’t seem to notice the change and merely downs another glass of red wine in front of him. Cal on the other hand… His face flares in pure shock as he watches me and his brother seated on my left.

I almost want to flip him off and tell him to look away and go fuck himself. I shouldn’t care what he thinks. I shouldn’t be having any reaction to the way he attempts to have eye contact with me. I shouldn’t still be remembering the feel of his lips on my skin tracing a fiery path. I shouldn’t.

So, I shut off my thoughts and lean back. Time to get this shit show started.

I don’t even bother to feign interest as I audibly hear his chair scrape back and I know that he’s now standing.

“Thank you for joining me here today. I’m excited to get to know you all later after dinner. You all look lovely” he says, the deep tone of his voice echoing throughout the room so silent and yet so full of tension. “I hope you understand how much your participation in my Queenstrial means to me and how much I’m looking forward to this experience”.

Then his uncle Julian Jacos adds on, “Tomorrow we’ll reconvene together in the morning for breakfast before we get started on ability training.”

Ability training. I almost forgot about that aspect of Queenstrial. This competition isn’t just about happiness or finding love it’s also about strength and who the most capable out of all of is.

“But for now, let’s eat” Cal add with an infuriating wink, ending the introduction.

And then silence. Pangs of silverware remains the only sound left in the room. Although almost instantaneously conversation starts in hushed whispers from small groups around the table. Girls whisper in each other’s ears trying to remain inconspicuous to their companions.

I sit there frozen in my spot just observing the other girls mumbling to each other, catching some parts of their conversation through phrases like “that one’s really ugly”, or “she’s a whore”.

Of course. What else do I expect from these girls. I’m still unmoving even as servants move in from different sides of the exits to the room bringing dishes of food with them.

As they set one in front of me which happens to be filled with thick slices of lamb and grilled potatoes, I suddenly remember the person sitting next to me. Looking sideways, I catch him staring at me.

He just smirks.

“Why are you sitting here? Next to me, I mean” I have the nerve to ask.

Laughing softly, he responds, “I thought we were friends”.

This must be some joke. Me and the younger prince being friends?

Rolling my eyes, I tell him, “Sure”. Even if part of me starts to lift the corner of my lips into a smile.

“So, when’s your Queenstrial?”, I ask him attempting to strike conversation.

“Mine? I’m not having one. I already have someone in my life.”

“Oh”

“His name’s Thomas.” He grins, and I can already tell his face softens as he says his name. “He’s great. Maybe you’ll even be able to meet him if he comes by”, he winks.

I smile and tell him I would love to. Even as my attention turns to my plate. My stomach almost groans in anticipation. It’s been a while since my last meal.

I cut into my slice of lamb and watch as the juice oozes out. Stabbing it with my fork I move it towards my mouth as Maven continues telling me about his boyfriend.

Right before the steaming morsel makes it to its destination, I catch Cal’s attention on me. Turning my head slightly, I finally meet my gaze.

I almost want to scoff seeing Evangeline to his right attempting to talk to him.

I love a challenge.

Putting the piece of meat into my mouth, standing up to his gaze it feels as if it’s just the two of us in the room even if it’s not true.

When I take my first taste of the morsel, I have to bite my lip to hold back the moan that threatens to escape my lips. Because this food was made for gods.

And he still watches me. Even as his golden eyes sharpen with some kind of internal fire.

I smirk. If he wants a show I’ll give him one.

Purposely licking my lips, I watch as his tongue darts out to wet his own. He holds my gaze as I grab my napkin and wipe off the remaining liquid deliberately slow letting it scrape my bottom lip ever so slightly.

His mouth opens preparing to do or say something stupid and completely inappropriate but before he can even get the chance to Evangeline puts a possessive hand on his bicep.

Yanked out of his daze, he shakes his head and I want so badly to laugh as he stares at Evangeline, blinking attempting to remember what she was talking about.

She sharpens her eyes at me as if she knows what or rather who was holding his attention and silently communicates to me through her facial expression, ‘Watch your back bitch’ before faking a smile at Cal and speaking to him softly.

I roll my eyes. She can have him for all I care. But that doesn’t explain what I was just doing.

The rest of dinner passes by uneventfully with Maven and I continuing to make small talk here and there about him, his life, but never my own.

He understands enough when he sees me flinch as he asks me about my brothers, that he refrains from broaching that subject.

Other than that, the food is absolutely divine. Following the main course, we’re served a beautiful dessert of chocolate ganache with some kind of frosting I can’t even name. All I can say is that it’s got to be the best thing I’ve ever tasted.

But just as I’ve finished indulging in it, Julian Jacos stands out of the corner of my eye.

“Now that dinner has elapsed, the Prince will meet all of you individually tonight for a short introduction” he says, lips in an almost smile.

Next to him, the King and Queen still sit unmoving and emotionless although the King’s face is about the shade of a tomato at this point. Drunk, no doubt about it.

I brave a look at Cal and his face is bursting into a wide smile. It makes him look almost young. Almost like the young man I met last night.

That thought hurts me more. Because he’s not that person. He’s the goddamn Prince of Norta, responsible for the oppression of my own people, for my brothers’ suffering, for every miserable night where my family and I went to sleep half freezing to death and empty stomachs.

It’s that that takes all of it out of me. Remembering exactly who he is, is the only thing keeping me sane.

So, while all of the royal family, including Prince Maven make their exit to another room beyond the dining room while we stay seated, I contemplate ways to make this impending conversation bearable.

Maybe I’ll end up just staying silent and he’ll get the hint that I don’t want to talk and leave me alone. Maybe he’ll bring up last night and our meeting.

It’s option 2 that scares me most. Because on the inside I know I’m a fucking coward. I can’t face it. I can’t face him bringing up the reality of what I did or rather what we did.

All of the girls end up lining up behind the white door of the room where the prince is currently waiting for us all. I’m content in taking the last spot in the line so I can continue overthinking every possible circumstance of my inevitable meeting.

Before the first girl goes in Maven gives me a wink from where he and his parents are walking at the other end of the castle where I presume the royal family resides.

I roll my eyes as I watch him mouth “good luck”.

From my observations the conversations with the prince end up being about 3 minutes a piece as the line starts dwindling down. Once the girls finish their meeting they usher themselves up the staircase and to their rooms.

Good. Now no one has to see me after I end up embarrassing myself.

Quicker than I thought, the line is left with just 2 people. Me and another girl who I presume is Melody from the eavesdropping I’ve done. A name fitting for a banshee.

She gives me a look up and down at my dress and appearance before giving me a confident smirk.

“He’ll never fall for trash like you”, she snarks to me before shutting the door in my face.

And I’m left, not entirely surprised by myself in the empty hallway. These girls certainly love to assume that I would want him in the first place.

Waiting on my own is surprisingly daunting as I shamefully attempt to eavesdrop on the conversation happening beyond the dark oak door. I hear a laugh. And it’s his.

My heart makes an unwelcome pang at the sound. I silently scold myself. It’s not like you even know him.

More pondering thoughts elapse as Melody opens the door suddenly making me jump from my slumped position against the wall. She gives me another disgusted look and walks herself back to her room.

Fucking hell. Fuck.

I’m left alone staring at the door wondering whether or not to go in or just run and forget that this ever happened. Suck it up Mare. Get it over with. You were never a quitter anyways.

Another 20 seconds passes and I reluctantly grab the door knob. Twisting it, I forcefully push it open determined to make an entrance. That is, before it shoves into the person on the other side.

I hear a surprised “Shit”, from what I presume is Cal as I mentally scream inside my head. IDIOT!

Even though I would rather electrocute myself at this point I side step the door slowly and face him.

My face almost wants to crumple into laughter at the sight. The crown prince of Norta doubled over with a hand on the door, clutching his forehead which now sports a mildly angry red welt.

I almost feel sorry. But then again, I don’t.

“Oh!” he says looking up as he sees that I’m here. “I- I uhm was expecting you”.

I roll my eyes. Of all the things to say when he first sees me, that’s what comes out of his mouth.

“Yeah, you too.”

“Mareena. Unless you lied about that?”

My face heats with a semblance of shame. Remembering how he said that name last night only makes it worse.

“It’s Mare” I try to say confidently. No need to let him know how he affects me.

“Mare” he repeats. “Suits you more than Mareena, I’ll give you that”

I don’t say anything. I just stand there, infinitely aware of how close his hard, toned body is to my own. If he wanted, one more step would push me against the wall. My flushing face is likely showing just what I’m thinking.

“So, why didn’t you tell me who you were” he asks me. “Then we could have avoided this… surprise.”

“Well, I’m not exactly going to spill my life’s secrets to some stranger just because we fucked” I respond sharply.

He seems taken aback as he almost stumbles before he responds, “And do you often take strangers to bed in shabby clubs?”

“I- I’m sorry? Are you really such a misogynist that you’re debasing me for the same behavior as your own?”

I don’t even have words. He thinks I’m a slut who parades around spreading my legs for anyone and everyone. And I wonder why I ever doubted that I would hate him.

“Well at least I’m not in the habit of having hook-ups knowing that I’m supposed to be committing to a relationship the next day”, he retorts.

My face heats to a different kind of red. The kind filled with fury. “Goodnight your highness. I think we’re done here”. I say abruptly before I succumb to my anger and slap him.

“Wait! That’s not what I meant!” he calls out, hand outstretched as if to catch me.

But I couldn’t give less of a fuck. He said what he said. And I’m walking out leaving him still standing and gaping after me.

…

I debate leaving this god damned castle; leave and never come back. After that statement it shows exactly what he thinks of me. Just another girl who’s going to fawn after him and vie for his love like some doe eyed fool. Just trash to be used once and disposed.

It’s that thought that makes me want to show him exactly what he’s missing. And it’s what drives me to find my room where Walsh has already left leaving me a note telling me to text her if I need anything, conveniently leaving a cell phone number.

I just turn the paper over and collapse onto bed not even bothering to change out of my clothes and makeup. It’s not even worth it at this point.

And it’s not until I snuggle under the covers which are disgustingly so soft that I let myself cry to sleep.

...

a/n: thank you guys so much for reading, this chapter was a rollercoaster to write but I’m excited to see what comes up later

love you all <3

#red queen #mare barrow #cal calore #fanfic #writing #bachelor #modernau #queenstrial

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simple-heroics · 4 years

Text

Class 1-A Girls as Roommates

Oh, my god, they were roommates

Momo Yaoyorozu

First of all, you lucky bastard I hate you. Secondly, I’d like to make the point that Momo is wealthy af and has no financial need of a roommate. So, if you two are living, you’re probably already great friends with her or more.

Momo loves to share. She is an extremely generous person, so she'll totally offer you some of her food when she cooks and even some of her shower products.

Totally lets you borrow her clothes. Different sizes? She's gotchoo! Can and will create the best clothes for you. This is especially helpful if you have a date.

Speaking of her Quirk, its usefulness becomes really apparent when you two first move in and are still figuring out where things are or what you still need for the house. Bought that knife set but somehow forgot a can opener? Momo’s gotchoo again.

A great communicator and takes the initiative to make sure you guys are on the same page about chores. Despite her busy hero career, Momo still does a great job keeping up with her fair share.

Please sit and drink tea with her. She'd love it. Probably the best thing about being Momo's roommate is coming home at the end of the day to this beautiful woman omg are you're okay with just being roommates and catching up over cups of freshly brewed tea.

If something happens and you’re unable to pa your rent one month, Momo can cover it. Will not guilt or shame you over this. No matter what kind of petty roommate argument you two might have, she will never hold that over your head. Ever. Things happen, and Momo understands that.

The not so great...

Yaomomo is such a sweetie but...she's also a rich girl who is used to a lot space. Her furniture will fill up the whole apartment. An entire kitchen cabinet is stuffed to the brim with her teas, so you'd have to find some other space to shove your cereal.

Nonetheless, she tries very hard to be a good roommate - especially if it's her first place after moving out of her parents' house/school dorms - and this sometimes leads to her being overly accommodating. That and the above can lead to some tension between you two.

Momo has such long, beautiful hair...and it absolutely gets clogged in y'all's shower. Good luck.

Mina Ashido

Mina is the fun roommate! I’m talking late nights spent goofing off, playing video games and watching movies or even just talking if you want. If you two weren’t best friends before moving in together, guess what?

You’re best friends now. or more?

Alien Queen is also Snack Queen. Our pink homegirl buys lots of snacks and is more than happy to share.

Um, garbage? What garbage? Her Quirk dissolves it and that’s one utility y’all are saving money on now to get Kaminari to help with the electricity

No matter how bad your day was, how shitty your boss, how long your commute, Mina can always make you laugh. Which is a nice way to end an otherwise completely shit day.

Actually pretty good about keeping the apartment tidy! Living in the UA dorm taught her a lot about being considerate of shared spaces and she’s always out and about anyway. So almost no worries about messes

Because she’s either out and about or doing patrols, you actually get the apartment to yourself quite a bit?? Ummm, SCORE! Until you start missing your pink roomie/bestie

That is, if she’s not inviting/dragging you out to do stuff with her! If you’re someone who needs a bit of prompting to get out of the house, Mina is great for that!

Also...the roommate who is constantly trying to hook you up with her friends. Like, I’m serious. If you’re not already seeing anyone, this die hard romantic will constantly try to set you up with people hey, roomie, pls introduce me to Kirishima. You won’t need a dating app ‘cause Mina Ashido is your roommate and girl knows everybody.

The not so great...

If you're pretty introverted or just really prefer quiet at home, being roommates with Mina can be hard. Mina is a social butterfly - loud and bubbly and all these other wonderful qualities that simultaneously don't mesh well with most introverts.

Speaking of social butterfly, she invites her friends over. A lot. And y’all know that the Bakusquad spells c h a o s

It would also not surprise me if Mina had a number of...ahem, overnight guests. So prepare for extra (awkward) company at breakfast.

Sometimes gets so caught up in her social life, all those hobbies, and hero work that...she forgets that rent or utilities are due. Whoops. You’ll have to remind her sometimes. 😬

Good luck if you have wooden floorboards. Mina loves to dance and this means a lot of scuff marks.

Ochaco Uraraka

This cutie! 12/10 would room with her if I could

When she first started UA, Ochaco had to move to Musutafu and live on her on which I'm sure was a little scary for a 15-year-old girl and definitely lonely. She wasn't looking forward to being alone again after graduation but wait! She has you!

Really appreciates your presence in your shared home and will undoubtedly cherish you, even treating you like family. It makes her so happy when she comes home after a long day of patrols and having someone respond when she says, "I'm home!" Ochaco, lemme be your housewife

Video game nights with Dekusquad? Video game nights with Dekusquad!

Pretty clean and always does her dishes which automatically puts her the top tier of roommate categories, let’s be real.

She knows where all the deals are, when certain sales are happening, and where to go for the best discounts. And she shares all this hard-earned knowledge with her precious roomie (that's you, boo). Grocery shopping with her is intense because she gets super competitive about getting those deals before everyone else but it's also so much fun.

Master couponer. You knows those ladies that clip so many coupons that they sort them into little bags and actually sell them in bundles? That's Ochaco. She's even part of some online couponing groups.

But she always hands you the coupons for your favorite snacks.

The not so great..

Ochaco works really, really hard and takes on a lot of missions. So, when she gets home, the usually upbeat hero can be a little...grouchy. By grouchy, I mean snappy and sulky and -- who is this woman and what did she do to your sweet, adorable roommate?

Seriously, just don’t talk to her or make a lot of noise until she sleeps for 10+ hours and eats or she might send you floating to your shared ceiling.

That roommate who will get on you if you leave any of the lights on or stay in the shower for too long. She is NOT shelling out extra cash on utilities next month because of you!! honestly same

Toru Hagakure

Another fun roommate!

We’ve seen her room, and we can tell by looking at it that she loves to decorate. If you (probably) have different tastes than hers, Toru will find ways to compromise and combine both your preferences to decorate your shared apartment! You know what that means?

Ikea trips. Toru’s enthusiasm alone makes it so much fun but it’s not as fun when you inevitably lose her in that Swedish labyrinth. (Hint: Check the various kids’ sections. She got distracted by the cute plushies.)

If you two are not constantly updating your interior design, you’re at least adding to it. it makes the space just uniquely yours and feel so homey.

Toru has some real 👌👌 taste in movies. Her movie collection makes for some awesome movie nights. Bring all the blankets, plushies, and the like and you’re in for a chill night.

Out of everyone on this list, I feel like she’ll be the easiest to convince to get a pet. She skips the “well, who is gonna pay for food?” talk and doesn’t spend any too much time deliberating over her busy hero schedule - just jumps right on in to the nearest adoption agency.

Congrats, you’re now parents of an adorable, slightly grumpy rescue cat. Which - bonus - actually makes it so much easier keeping track of Toru because it’s almost always brushing against her legs or on her lap.

The not so great...

Definitely the nosy roommates. She wants to know all the details about your life and is the type to peak into your room because she's curious. Her Quirk only makes all the easier for her.

She likes to leave cute or funny messages on the fogged up bathroom mirror or with magnets on the fridge which is cute but...unnerving when an invisible being sends you random messages in your apartment.

....and according to the wiki, she loves hidden-camera prank shows? Welcome to Jackass, roomie. You’re gonna get pranked.

Also because of her Quirk, she often has to remove her clothes to make full use of her invisibility but this has also lead to a bad habit of leaving articles of clothing throughout the apartment. You often find random socks and gloves and even shirts out throughout the apartment.

Tsuyu Asui

A+ roomie. Seriously, give this girl all a gold star.

Super tidy, super considerate, and super stoked to live with you. She’s used to a full house and honestly wasn’t so sure about living on her own straight after graduation. Then came you!

Tsuyu looooves to cook with you. If your cooking skills need work, she’ll happily teach you. Out of everyone else on this list, you share the most meals together.

Soooo many blankets and pillows in your apartment! Tsu needs the extra layers during winter and honestly, just build a blanket fort for you two. It’s great. just roommates huh?

Absolutely will text you just to check in if she makes it home before you and has no problem either waiting up for you or even walking to meet if it’s dark. And honestly, what’s better than

Being super straightforward, Tsuyu always lets you know if there’s something up with the apartment or just if she’d like you to be a little quieter coming home. Also an observant person and checks in on your needs/preferences as well. Y’all rarely have any typical roommate spats because she’s direct and makes sure to communicate.

We stan a sweet, considerate frog roommate in this household.

The not so great...

Because she grew up taking care of two younger siblings and then lived with the entire 1-A class (19 teenagers in one building -- that's insane) in the dorms, Tsuyu actually has little tolerance for messes in common spaces.

Tsuya Asui ain’t your momma. You're both adults and you both pay rent, so she expects you clean up after yourself and will call you out if you don't.

Especially about those dishes left in the sink. You can say that you just left the pots in there "to soak", but Tsuyu ain't buying it. And she tells you as much.

Not above shaming your messes on her Snap story i’m that petty roommate or bringing up that you forgot to take out the trash in front of other people.

Kyouka Jirou

She's the cool roommate. By that, I mean the one you’re lowkey bragging about when you describe her to your friends. Girl is a hero, plays pretty much every instrument, and is just a cool person in general. It’s hard not to brag.

Seriously, just her mere presence alone makes your place at least 70% cooler than it would have been if you lived by yourself. That’s how cool she is.

Super respectful of your privacy. Like, she won’t even know what your room actually looks like unless you actually invite her in.

Great roommate banter. Kyouka has a great dry sense of humor and likes to tease people, so you two can go back and forth all day.

Great texter. She always gives you a heads up when people are over or if you guys need anything for the apartment. Bonus: lots of hilarious pics of Bakusquad being idiots.

Don't tell her that you can hear her when she sings in the shower; it'd just fluster her and make her self-conscious. But being able to listen to that amazing voice in your own home?👌👌👌

If you're someone who doesn't necessarily need or even want a tight knit relationship with a roommate, Kyouka is your best bet. She's generally really chill and won't get hyped over being best friends.

That said, she’s a pretty empathetic person and easy to talk to. She’ll absolutely stay up late with you just to talk if you need it. Gives great advice.

The not so great...

You will lose track over how many times you ask her to turn the music down.

Like Mina, Kyouka comes as a package deal with the Bakusquad. Kyouka doesn’t invite them over often because even she doesn’t want that chaos in her home but sometimes it’s inevitable.

She’s not much of a cook. Plus she’s pretty busy keeping up with her hero career, music, and group of friends, so she doesn’t have much free time anyway. This means she orders out - a lot. Good news? Hardly any friction over cleaning dishes. Bad news? Her take out boxes leave little room in the fridge for your food.

BONUS: Regardless of who you room with, you’ll hardly ever worry about a break-in or any crime in your neighborhood because your roommate is a professional hero and will kick any home intruder stupid enough to try anything.

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just-emotional-trash · 5 years

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An Outranked Romance Ch. 2

Pairings: Eventual Romantic Prinxiety, Logicality, and Remile

Story Summary: At Camp Regality, lords, ladies, and royalty alike learn the values of being a member of court in the Kingdom of Animiria. Prince Roman is thrilled at the chance to get out of the stuffy palace! Virgil, the son of a lowly Baron, is ready to leave the moment he gets there, and plans to slip through unnoticed. But what happens when a certain Princely figure won’t leave him alone?

Inspired by this post by @ironwoman359

Chapters: World-building - First - Previous - Next

Chapter Warning(s): Non-descript anxiety attack

Words: 2k

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Roman was so ready for camp to start-

In fact, he was packed a week in advance. Camp Regality was his first chance at freedom and art and a chance to finally meet some other people his age. His cousins were fun, but there was so much more out there. All of the other princes he met were either straight, in a relationship, or obnoxious and pretentious. As the limo pulled up to the camp, it bypassed the gate most of the nobility were being dropped off at and pulled directly up to the second largest building in the camp. It was a gold and white mansion, with large, greek columns and two large doors.

The chauffeur parked in front of the building, and the three guards assigned to the prince and two dukes flanked the limo and opened the doors. Roman walked out with a sigh and a stretch of his arms, grateful to get out of the limo he’s been in for the past five hours. He moved to grab hold of some of his bags (he had many of course, he would be here all summer!), but was stopped by one of the guards.

Roman frowned. “Let me help bring in my bags.” The guard didn’t budge, so Roman took a different approach. “Look, there’s a lot of bags, and only three of you. We’re not in the palace anymore, I can help without any ‘nobleman’ getting huffy over it!”

The guard sighed, “This is still a place of nobility, your highness. Let us do our job, it will be of no trouble.” Roman let out a resigned sigh and turned to his two cousins, currently looking around the camp with big eyes. Being members of the Royal family, they were all used to being carted from palace to palace any time they traveled. This was a change of pace, and what a change it was.

The woods behind the camp called him to explore, and the small lake in the distance sparked with invitation.The future nobility milled about in the sand pit and the sparing ground, meeting old and new friends. And behind them his two cousins- were now in front of him, holding the door open in invitation. They laughed as he realized he had been standing still, looking out across the camp. He chuckled and walked up the stairs, into the mansion.

—————

Roman, Patton, and Emile walked through the halls and up the stairs to find their rooms. Patton’s was immediately next to the stairwell, accented with a painted sign of his name in cursive on the front.

Patton grinned, “Aww! That sign is a-door-able!” Emile tried to stifle his laughter as Roman suppressed his grin and shook his head in disappointment. Patton just smiled at them and waved as he walked into his room with a guard following him with his bag.

Emile’s room was not far from Patton’s. It also had a sign with his name on it, this one with big, bubbly letters. Emile just grinned and walked into his room with a wave at Roman. The poor guy hasn’t had any alone time in the three days it took to travel to the camp, so he was probably eager to have some space to himself.

Roman walked a small ways to the end of the hallway, where his name was written on a sign in an elegant scrawl across the large door. He walked through the doorway to find a room nearly as large his own at the palace. The room was crawling with colors of the nobility - white, red, and gold - and Roman was happy to see them follow him here. After all, red was his favorite color for this exact reason.

He made his way over to the corner of the room, where he was delighted to find a piano, sheet music, and an easel with paints. Being the masculine prince he was, he was discouraged by members of the court to learn artistic abilities. “That is women’s work,” they called, “leave something for the female nobility to contribute!” Not that he didn’t enjoy swordsmanship or sparing, but he wished to express his creativity!

His father, King Thomas, had never discouraged him from pursuing such simple delights as art, and even got him a sketchbook. However, anytime the young royal had tried to learn an instrument, a man of nobility had come to sweep him away for one reason or another. This left him with only his voice, which he had developed well over the years.

"Alright piano,” Roman said as he dramatically pulled the cover off of the instrument, “show me what you’ve got!” He sat down and pulled out sheet music. He spent a few minutes singing the bars and rhythms and matching them to the notes before he got a feel for it. A few hours work and a lot of frustration later, he could barely pluck out “Twinkle, Twinkle, Little Star”. Groaning in frustration, he pulled away from his piano and clambered into bed, draping himself dramatically over the comforter. A moment passes and he hears a knock on the door.

“Hey kiddo!” Patton walks in without need of permission. “That was some good music I heard from down the hall!”

Roman groaned, “You heard all that?” Patton nodded empathetically. “Don’t patronize me. Turns out playing piano does not come quite as naturally as expected.”

Patton smiled as he sat down at the foot of Roman’s bed. “Well, you just need to find a good teacher! You have a music class in the afternoons, correct?”

Roman shot up, “Hey yeah! I bet someone would be able to teach me!” Patton just smiled and nodded his head. Roman tackled him in a hug, “Pat, you are a blessing upon my life!”

Patton laughed at his cousin’s antics and said, “Yes, of course, I know, but now we need to go down for dinner!” At this, Roman took notice of his cousin’s suit and light blue tie. “Ah, of course! I’ll change into my uniform.”

They walked downstairs to meet Emile in a light pink tie and an older, stern looking woman in a dress that looked like it was made for her grandmother. “Hello,” she spoke in a voice far too high to be pleasant, “I am Miss Higgenbotham, the headmistress of this campus. i welcome you, Prince Roman! And your cousins, the Dukes. Welcome also. I trust Cabin Majesty has been accommodating?”

Roman could tell that she was just as snotty and old fashioned as the rest of the court at home. He could only hope the other kids there wouldn’t all be the same. He turned on his courtly smile and responded, “Thank you, headmistress. I’ve been nothing but impressed and am eager to spend my summer in such a lovely camp.” She stiffly smiled back, reassuring him that he used the correct amount of formality.

Guards flanked them as they started toward the main building as Miss Higgenbotham began to point out buildings and giving them names that Roman immediately forgot. All he managed to remember is that the largest building was called the Palace of Perfection and it was the home base of the camp. As they approached the main doors, Emile lagged behind the rest. Patton went back to find out what was wrong, and Roman and the headmistress stopped by the foot of the stairs.

After a minute of talking, Patton started hugging Emile. Roman finally saw his younger cousin’s face and could tell he was crying. “Headmistress Higgenbotham, if you would go on into the ballroom, we will join you shortly.” She seemed miffed at the break of her plan, but she nodded nonetheless and walked in. Roman walked over to the brothers and put his arms around the both of them.

“What do I need to slay my sweet Emile? A dragon? A witch? A dragon witch?” Roman could feel his younger cousin laugh softly as they pulled apart.

Emile wiped at his eyes and slowed his breathing as he tried to gather his thoughts. “I-its just... there’s going to be so many people in there, a-and I’m not even supposed to be here yet-”

Patton interrupted him, “Emile, you’re here now because Roman and I wanted you to go to camp with us! It just wouldn’t be the same with only two thirds of the three musketeers!”

Emile still looked doubtful, so Roman added, “Besides, who else would help talk me through it when I inevitably screw something up? I need my therapist at my side just as much as my best friends!” Emile cracked a smile at that and nodded.

“Okay,” Patton clapped, “let’s go wash your face and let the redness calm down and we can go on in.” They entered the mansion and asked the house staff to lead them to a bathroom. A sweet maid led them to a small, personal bathroom just off of the Grand Ballroom where the dinner was to take place. They took their time joking and laughing until they decided to go on to the meal.

As they walked up to the grand double doors, a large man with a staff walked in before them and called out, “Presenting Prince Roman Sanders, and his Royal Dukes, Patton and Emile Picani!” Roman shrugged and stepped out, once again donning his court smile and waved at his fellow campmates. He felt his cousins following him, which was a great comfort.

As they reached the end of the long walkway between tables, the headmistress walked up to a podium and gestured for Roman to stand beside her. She began to give a welcoming speech, which the royal tuned her out in favor of taking a look around the room. Everyone was in uniform - a white shirt and kaki bottoms, with a grey blazer and the Royal Crest on their lapel. He met the eyes of many as he surveyed the room, but they caught on a pair of mismatched ones. One blue and the other... brown? Hazel? It was hard to tell from far away, but surreal to say the least, not to mention the strange dark shadow underneath his eyes. The man that owned the strange eyes was beautiful, with dark hair and sharp eyes that stared right back into his light brown ones.

Suddenly, the eyes left his as the man ducked down and began to talk to the person beside him wearing sunglasses. Roman was made aware of the rest of the room once again, and noticed that the headmistress was still dragging her speech on.

“Not only is the royal family oh so generous for allowing us to be blessed with the presence of their very offspring, but they also-”

Roman stepped up to the elder woman and placed a gentle hand on her shoulder. As much as I appreciate this glowing speech,” he speaks as he leans over into the microphone, “these people must be awful tired of waiting for their food. I know I am!” His princely smile returned once again to his face as the people laughed and showed agreement.

“Yes well,” she made a disgruntled face at her speech being cut short, but she would not deny the prince. “I suppose it would be alright if we went ahead and began dinner. Waiters! Appetizers, please.”

Waiters flow through the doors as the Headmistress Higgenbotham gripped his arm to guide him to the staff table at the front of the room. A small part of him had hoped that he would be allowed to sit where he wished (certainly not just to learn the name of the beautiful stranger he held eye contact with for just a moment too long), but he knew that even such a small freedom would be over the line.

Roman sat down at the right hand of the headmistress as she lifted her glass. “A toast!” she called to the table, “To the beginning of another great summer!” Roman lifted his glass and smiled as he prepared for one of the best summers of his life, even with the few restrictions left over from the palace.

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Taglist: @treasureofpriam @ghosttb0y @mostpeopleannoyne @athenashipsthings @icequeenorginal @monroig @anaussiefander @www-dot-ohshit-dot-com @cas-is-a-hunter @justastressedprincess

#an outranked romance #royal camp! au #prinxiety #ts prinxiety #logicality #ts logicality #ts remile #remile #roman sanders #ts roman #virgil sanders #ts virgil #patton sanders #ts patton #emile picani #ts emile #ts dr picani

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lizzybeth1986 · 5 years

Text

Quick Thoughts on The Royal Heir, Book 1 Chapter 1

• We're back! Hopefully with a better series this time, but I'm not going to keep my hopes too high.

• If my QTs are clogging up your dash, I recommend you block these particular tags: #trh quick thoughts, #trh qts, and optionally #long post.

• Much like my Book 3 QTs, I will be exploring as many playthroughs as I possibly can to see how each LI's route is being written. Last book, this experiment definitely helped me figure out that they were putting more effort into some characters and less into others, and I'd still like to keep an eye out for these things as much as possible.

• I feel this QT might be shorter than my usual (edit: joke's on me - it's not!! 🙈), mostly because the opening chapter itself is...pretty light, and is mostly meant for us to spend time and have fun with our chosen LI. Plus a tiny smidgen of buildup to the premise, which is having a child in Cordonia. But I do have a theory about the overall theme that I'm going to be expanding on towards the end of the chapter.

• Okay that's it for preliminary explanations, it's time for me to start with the chapter! XD

• Ooh. Oooooooh. This loading page now has tidbits about Cordonian society!! Interesting.

• Title: Happily Ever Afterwards

Alternative Title: Be Grateful We're Letting You Have This Much Sex For Free This Week, Because That's The Last Time It's Happening.

• I'm extremely offended they're making me wear that Pepto Bismol outfit again.

•

...thanks so much for reminding me you still don't care about Hana, PB! 🙄 Everyone else remains to be some version of "loyal", but Hana is still considered more for her skills than for her own steadfastness, even though she was the most hardcore-loyal of the four (SHE LEFT HER FREAKING HOME. HER FREAKING FAMILY. FOR YOU. While the other three were certainly loyal and honorable to the MC, they definitely didn't have to completely cut ties with their families to do right by the MC).

• The "fairytale" aesthetics of the frame story were what drew people into TRR in the first place, so it's not too surprising that the LIs and MC give a nod to the flagship series with a "once upon a time". If you're with Liam, it goes straight from "falling in love with the Prince" to what his relationship with her taught him, before the happily ever after. If you're with one of the other three LIs, it specifies that she came there for Liam but fell for someone else. Sounds a lot like Maxwell's book 😄 In Maxwell's playthrough, in fact, there is a reference to it when the MC calls him a "famous author".

•

(Screenshots organized as follows: 1 - Liam, 2 - Drake, 3 - Maxwell, 4 - Hana. Liam's and Hana's are my own. Drake's from @thefirstcourtesan, and Maxwell's from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

The other interesting thing to note is that in Liam's playthrough, he leads the narration. While in everyone else's the MC is the one who steers it. One reason I can think of is that the narrative still treats this story as Liam's story as much as it is the MC's (if I'm right about the theme) - which...has honestly always been a sore point with the fanbase in TRR. That would depend on how us and our baby are now further involved with Cordonia in the story. Another factor for why she leads the narration...could be that essentially, the MC took initiative in the other three relationships, while in Liam's case it was he who took a more active role by proposing to her.

• The little story ends with this question from the MC:

Question: But what happens after Happily Ever After?

Answer: Mess. In Cordonia it's always mess.

• Cordonians (specifically the upper classes, since I don't know enough about the common populace to tell, since they're, yknow, practically invisible) are addicted to tea, apples and fucking shit up where they don't even need to.

• ANYWAY. What (literally) happens after 'happily ever after' is a tropical honeymoon on Liam's private island. In the case of the other three, he allows them access to the place and gives the staff instructions on making the stay comfortable for them.

• Now, since Liam owns the island and has probably visited it a could times, he shows more familiarity with it. He tells his wife that on previous trips the island had more rustic accommodations, but the villa they're now staying in was prepared recently. Additionally, the butler welcomes Hana, Maxwell and Drake as newcomers to the island, considering it's their first time. With Liam, there is an air of familiarity - he calls the butler by his name (Javier) and enquires about him and his wife (Mariana) - to show us perhaps how familiar he is with this holiday spot.

• Why the hell does everyone call Liam "Your Highness"? It's been two whole books since he became King, and the proper title for a monarch is "Your Majesty". How is it that Constantine gets to rake the MC over the coals for calling him Your Highness, yet Liam has to hear this from practically everyone. From Javier to freakin' Protocol-Monitor-Madeleine! The disrespect, I tell you!

• Okay so we're having a candlelit dinner by the ocean, and we get our first OOTD. Cute beach dress, has bright flowers and some crochet work on the bodice. I bought it because I couldn't bear to have Esther stay another minute in that Pepto Bismol of a dress.

• LOL @ all the LI responses to "this spot is right where the sharks are!"

• Tuna sashimi and pineapple aioli, huh? I have never had either so idek what that's supposed to taste like (someone on this writing team likes pineapples). I remember having to cut down on tuna during pregnancy, which meant no more Subway sandwiches since the tuna sub was the only one I liked at the time. IIRC most of my family were also cautioning me against pineapples and papaya during my first trimester!

• My gosh this butler doesn't waste much time jumping into assumptions huh?

• Also Javier, why is Cordonia's future so dependent on the well-being of my foetus even if I'm not ruling the country?

• Does Cordonia have sex ed? My money is on no. (esp in the Hana route).

• So there are two parts to the way the premise of wanting to have kids is built up in this sequence. In the first part, the LI impresses upon the MC the need to have children soon after the wedding. The second part addresses the urgency - the "why right now?" factor, and explores the LI's personal emotions towards having children. This bit also feels a bit like a follow-up to the Valtoria balcony scene in Chapter 15.

• The first part is pretty similar for Drake, Hana and Maxwell - all three of whom are now married to a Duchess and are aware that securing the duchy is important. They word it in their own distinctive styles, but the gist is pretty much the same. In Liam's case, since he is the king of the country, he speaks more about Cordonia and its tensions with neighbouring countries.

Take note of this because I'll be returning to this point later. (also who are the writers trying to convince about Cordonia's size. "Small kingdom" my ass).

• I'll be going by the LIs' personal reasons to have a baby now, one by one, along with a summary of their views on children in the Valtoria balcony scene last book (since this scene clearly references that diamond scene if you've bought it last book).

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drake's is from @thefirstcourtesan and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel)

- Liam: Liam's love for family and need for children is well-known throughout the series. In Book 1, he's dropped hints about wanting to have a different kind of family dynamic from the one he'd experienced as a child, and in Book 2 there were multiple references to wanting to not be Constantine - both as a King and as a father. In the balcony scene in Book 3, Chapter 15, Liam tells us a number of things - about the value of having more heirs for succession, of him always dreaming of having at least 3 children, about Kenna, Cordonia's most legendary warrior queen which leads to an interesting factoid about how the rules of successions for both the throne and duchies are not gender-specific (he also cites Olivia and Penelope as being in line to inherit their duchies). In this sequence Liam undoubtedly has more to say about the political aspect of having an heir than the personal, but his statement about "someone missing" in their lives is of no surprise when he's been enthusiastic about kids for three books straight.

- Drake: Drake perhaps gets the lengthiest 'personal' bit of all, revolving around his eagerness to be a father and his own family history. This scene has Drake speaking of wanting a child with "your eyes and my hair", but most of all of Savannah and her little family, and wanting the happiness his sister is experiencing now. The writing often manages to tie Drake's thoughts about his future family with his past: in the Valtoria balcony scene, his memories of his father and his desire to bring up his own kids the way Jackson did are dominant in the conversation on children. He speaks at length about the absence of a proper 'home' so far in his life (stating that his room at the palace always felt like "a room in someone else's house") and how high on his priority list the prospect of having children is. The Valtoria scene shows him eager to have kids asap, and this scene builds up the same urgency. You're left in no doubt that he wants those kids now.

• Maxwell: Maxwell's route of this scene soundly pretty sudden, tbh. In his Valtoria scene, Maxwell expressed doubt and nervousness when it came to children, citing the example of Bartie ("I love palling around with little Bartie and everything, but if he bonks his head or something, I can just hand him back to Savannah. When it's your kid, you're the one people hand him to."). While this is referenced in TRH's dialogue when Maxwell jokes about forgetting diapers and baby socks - it's a pretty big jump from the man who didn't exactly feel ready to have children yet, and not enough work was done to justify that shift. This could be somewhat excused in the beginning of Book 3, when the narrative had just begun to treat him like an LI, but they've had an entire damn book and several months after to reflect on how to write him properly. That is...if they actually gave a damn.

- Hana: They don't even have the excuse of "relatively new LI" in Hana's case. Because she is the lone female LI married to a female MC, her scene should have been a lot more extensive and explored her urgency to have children so soon after their wedding, a whole lot more. There are tiny changes, like the one where she hints at the "logistical concerns" that come with two women considering a family, and where she speaks of giving her child the childhood she never had (which, frankly, is an extremely vague statement and could be applicable to more than one character in Cordonia). But there is urgency that, again, isn't properly explained in the scene. Even Hana's Valtoria scene doesn't have much that would explain why she would want a child barely weeks after her wedding. The Valtoria scene does have her outlining her dreams for the duchy (along with a joke about her enacting "Beauty and the Beast") and her happiness at the thought of being a mother (she maintains that out of the things expected of her, motherhood is the one she looked forward to). They could have spent some time thinking up a reason for why Hana would rush this, even before anything has happened, or outlined something personal and not ultra-generic. Both Maxwell and Hana deserved a lot better than this.

• Maxwell speaks about possibly forgetting diapers (PLS NO MAXWELL NO) and baby socks (um okay not as bad but depends on the climate), and one of the MC's dialogue options is to say..."diapers and socks are overrated". Guys your kid won't care how much fun you are when they have a bum rash.

• A-ha! Diamond scene. First-chapter diamond love scenes always come cheap in these series' (12 diamonds) and are usually quite a steal.

• ESTHER HAS NEW LINGERIE OMG I'M SO HAPPY I'D BEEN WAITING FOR THIS MOMENT FOR SO LOOOOONG 😭😭😭😭

• ...and it is also matches Liam's underwear. Maxwell's too 😅

• The scene is nice, there are variations between the ways the LIs work up their appetite before they finally roll in the...well, sand 😅 Maxwell has what they call an "ocean duel", Hana's fulfills her lifelong dream of carrying and spinning around her wife on a secluded beach, Drake chases the MC through the water...and Liam just enjoys being a huuuge tease, okay? 😂

• Oh God, why are they still using the old LoveHacks sexytimes music. That "DHUM-boom-ta-doom-DHUM" beat drives me nuts, and not in a good way. You have better music now, PB! Like the sexytimes tunes from RCD and PM. Use those!

• My gosh this entire group is quite horny for dominant duchesses, aren't they. Every last one of them. Each playthrough has these four gazing at the MC in wonder and telling her some variation of "I think you ordering me around is hot". Olivia could trample over them all with spiked heels and they would thank her!

• As always, when something suspicious happens, my dumbass MC goes ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ and never thinks about it again until shit actually goes down. This woman will never learn, will she.

• Anyway! We now move on to the rest of the honeymoon, summed up in three-four varying scenes per LI:

(Screenshots: Liam's and Hana's screenshots are mine, Drakes is HIMEME's YouTube channel, and Maxwell's is from Kaitlyn Walker's YouTube channel).

- Liam: Focused and dedicated. And insatiable as hell. Sex on a bed (SHOCKING!), sex after his wife points out what could be an apple constellation during stargazing (the MC effectively killed Liam's boner for Cordonia, I see), sex after having chocolate strawberries at a sunlit pond, sex again on a bed (Why is he getting four? 🤔). While the staff is still around somewhere on the island. This is a man with a mission.

- Maxwell: Fun and playful - kind of a "let's live wild and do daredevilry while we can!" vibe. In one Maxwell and the MC cliff dive into the ocean, debating over the wisdom of such risky adventuring when they may possibly be having a baby. In another, the MC watches, concerned, as Maxwell eats a raw squid appetizer. There is a nice callback to Maxwell's House sigil - the kraken - when he tells her that a squid would never hurt a fellow squid. The third shows them playing Strip Monopoly in the comfort of their bedroom.

- Hana: Adorable, caring and looking through every detail. Hana's three scenes involve her showing the MC the sights around the sunlit pond (which Hana and the MC lovingly call the "Hana Lee Honeymoon Itinerary"), watching the sunset under blankets, and this little scene of them choosing sperm donors for their baby:

It's a nice addition, but it still doesn't explain why they couldn't have waited a few more months. Nothing has happened yet in the timeline of the story, the women are (they believe) finally safe and happy, and while Javier seems to believe that babies born to a couple that consists of two women pop out of nowhere, I'm hoping the denizens of their duchy will have at least a little more common sense (this is Cordonia, so "hope" is the operative word).

- Drake: Langorous, relaxed and contented. Stargazing on the beach (I wonder whether this was a nod to the meteor shower scene in Book 1), whiskey on a patio/balcony/whatever in the afternoon, and eating roasted pork by the fire. Plenty of sex but also lots of outdoors, which means lots of the stuff Drake enjoys doing.

• Aaaaaand it's time for sexy scene 2! The couple are now relaxing in bed on the last day of their honeymoon, and the LI proposes a momento in the form of a sensual photoshoot (which comes with artwork of the LI in their underwear, posing for the MC) The male LIs pose with their hands at the back of their heads, smirking at the camera, while Hana strikes a coy pose, leaning against her hand. It's a quick, fun scene that's supposed to squeeze as much alone-time out of the couple as possible, because from here on the focus may shift to other things. Basically this chapter is meant to be one giant (but largely safe for readers) smutfest. I like the artwork - it's different and I guess meant to be a little more realistic than the usual full-page art in the books (like the engagement and wedding photos with your LIs last book), which is why I think it takes a little getting used to. I know it took me some time!

• Maxwell got an underwear upgrade too!

• We've now come to the end of our honeymoon, our bags packed and ready for our return to Cordonia. The chapter ends with us seeing a "familiar face", who could either be Liam (if you married someone else, and he doesn't show any expression) or an unspecified person (if you married Liam, and he looks ultra happy). Now that could either be related to some paparazzi-related stuff, if the flash of light was paparazzi-related, or it could be a fake-out and he's actually brought along the rest of the gang to surprise you. Idk and I don't want to speculate too much on this, mostly because something more interesting caught my eye.

• So that's it for my thoughts on the scenes themselves! On to the "general thoughts" section.

• General Thoughts and Potential Theories:

- As a first chapter for a new series that is still tied to an older one, it worked. It mirrors the light feel and sensibility of TRR's very first chapter, in that both chapters build an illusion of a fairytale-like place, with hints of the darkness within emerging the next chapter onwards (in this series though - since we're already familiar with Cordonia - the darkness is lightly hinted at this chapter itself). In a lot of ways I think we're going to see a lot of parallels between TRR and this new series.

- Unfortunately, one of those similarities also includes the imbalance in the writing for the LIs. Specifically with Maxwell and Hana. It's the most glaring in the dinner scene, which builds for us the premise on which this entire book stands (the topic of pregnancy). There are ways you could have them make the jump from nervous about having kids to excited, if you tried - there are elements in their storyline that could have helped us understand their urgency.

- I played Liam's route first, and was happy overall with it but I still have my misgivings. The good in terms of Liam's story is that he gets importance because the story is also about him and his country, where we are staying. He gives us some very important details in his route, and personally I like that his role as Guide To The Intricacies And Nuances of Cordonian Society still exists...but you can't deny that there were things in his storyline which should have been addressed and never were. I hope those are addressed this book. If they do the same this time around, it will only be to their detriment.

- Also, I find it highly ironic that Drake is the one to mention Savannah and Bartie when it was MAXWELL who was more involved in helping her with the child. Sure, he was - as he confessed in that Valtoria scene - more the "fun uncle" type, but he was still pretty heavily involved. Still keeping track of what Savannah needed and what Bartie would want. In his own final Book 3 scene, Maxwell is shown having an amazing rapport with little Bartie, playing peekaboo with his nose. I can barely count scenes involving Drake and Bartie with the fingers of one hand. Why couldn't Maxwell reference that last moment in Book 3, drawing up some inspirational moment from it? Like spending more and more time with Bartie changed the way he felt about kids? Or maybe that Savannah or Bertrand said something regarding the joy children bring to him. Anything that gives us some idea of when this shift happened.

Maxwell may have been new last book. It may have been a struggle to know what to do with him last book. But that isn't the case right now. By now they should have settled in their writing of him and figured out ways to make his story make sense? To give him more depth rather than simply reducing the man to the court jester? Maxwell's story was supposed to be about him growing, the scene in Valtoria was supposed to be about wanting to be a good father for his future children but fearing he might fail...yet the writers have the same man say the exact opposite. Maxwell's family history was thrown away for no good reason last book, and was replaced by Savannah drama. There was more space given to Savannah's love story with Bertrand (which didn't NEED the entire book to gain fruition) and Drake (optionally) enjoying humiliating Bertrand. That time, energy and effort could have gone in building up Maxwell, getting an insight into what happened to the Beaumonts that they became so poor...but no. The only Beaumont that mattered seems to be Savannah (and we know exactly why). And going by the fact that they're going to force an entire wedding storyline involving Bertrand and Savannah down our throats, that still seems to be the case.

- Hana's is even more worrying considering that it was poles apart from the rest of the playthroughs and therefore SHOULD have had more thought. Yes Hana loves the idea of being a mother. Yes Hana loves children and has a nurturing nature. But the urgency is still the same as the others' in her playthrough, and it made absolutely no sense. There was a clear dissonance between their current situation and the rush these two were in.

Hana's deserved at least some more time in her dinner scene. Maybe one where she could speak about growing up an only child, with no companions and not even toys. She could explain the loneliness involved in having a small family with parents who gave her more duties than affection, and then speak about giving her kid a better childhood. There isn't even any discussion about which of them should be the person carrying (we know it will be the MC, but why it has to be her in their case is anyone's guess).

What the team have done here is give Hana the bare minimum, after an entire two books of giving her even less than that. I know I'll probably be judged for thinking negatively rather than being cautiously optimistic, but the fact is that the moment this team feels they can get away with tossing scraps or less than that, they can and will do it. It's not stopped them before: not from botching up Hana's storyline, not from giving Hana fans a reception full of goof-ups and shoddy writing, not from pairing her with her bully. Perhaps last year I would have been happy and grateful to see Hana and the MC calling each other "my wife". This time...I refuse to settle for just mere scraps. If you can give thought and care to Liam and Drake's storylines, you'd better be able to do the same for Hana and Maxwell, otherwise what's the point of reviving this book? What's the point of using Hana specifically in two of your ads as bait for your lesbian/bi/wlw fans?? Might as well let the entire series rot in the trash where it belongs in that case.

- I've heard theories about our child becoming heir to the throne, thanks to a possible future arc that may make Liam unable to have children. I personally hate this possible plot line for two reasons:

1. As it is the MC gets more importance than she deserves, whether or not she actually puts in the work. She becomes a front-runner during the social season even if she fails. She becomes a Duchess even if she lacks even the most basic skills, while Hana who has done way more than she ever had for the country gets nothing, not even a needle-point's worth of land. She becomes Champion of the Realm even if she is literal garbage throughout that book, when that title could have easily gone to Olivia or Hana instead if she didn't earn enough to get it. And now to have her kid be made an heir to the throne? For no good reason? Get outta here.

2. Forcing Liam into yet another storyline that is tragic and painful (and I'm pretty sure the writers will find yet another excuse to write a thesis on Drake Walker in the time they could be using to let Liam actually break down, or vent. If they couldn't be bothered to explore the man's feelings when his own father died, do you really think they will bother with him in this??) on top of whatever else he's had to experience so far? At this point I can do with less of that. I'm honestly sick of storylines that put Liam in very uncomfortable, painful situations with very little space for him to air out his grief. Give the man a fucking break. Let him have some breathing space to rule his goddamned kingdom, get him a fantastic therapist and get him better friends while he's at it. Pushing him into yet another messed-up situation when you've barely even scratched the surface with what his experiences have done to him, is really just drama for the sake of drama, nothing else.

- Nonetheless, since this is about a pregnancy and a future heir, I believe there will be plenty talk about succession, and about the importance given to fertility and children in Cordonian society. But as with the social season in Book 1, the engagement tour in Book 2, and the wedding + Unity Tour in Book 3, I believe the pregnancy itself is a frame story. The kind of story that justifies the glitz, the glitter, and the glamorous events...that can serve as a temporary gloss to cover the conflicts within. All while the inner stories reveals those conflicts, layer by layer (again, if it's done right. Book 3 is a good example of a great premise ruined by bad writing. I sincerely hope this book does not go in that direction).

- Remember those screenshots I put up in that dinner scene from Liam's route? About Cordonia's tensions with its neighbouring countries, and how the country may be viewed as vulnerable? I think that's where the actual theme of the story lies.

Books 1 and 2 mostly revolved around the illusion of Cordonia - the fairytale kingdom - before the MC herself is confronted with the tensions brewing within. Book 3 was about strengthening Cordonia through resolution of internal conflict. It was about learning about the intricacies of the country, its most powerful duchies, their histories and identities, Cordonia's messy, complicated history - to tackle the problems that lay within.

I feel like Book 4 would be taking a natural progression from resolving internal conflict to finally standing united as a nation against outside forces. Constantine - in his conversation with the MC in Shanghai - hints not only at groups within Cordonia that wanted to destroy the monarchy, but also foreign powers ("suffice to say there are those who envy Cordonia's prosperity...". Not the royal family's - but "Cordonia's").

Keeping a united front and showcasing strength through pride in the country - ergo 'patriotism', or perhaps 'national integration' since Cordonia is home to many different cultures and geographical locations (I originally wrote 'nationalism here, but now realize there may be negative connotations attached to that word in today's times: thanks @musicallisto!) is often viewed as an asset against alien forces. The MC is now a part of the monarchy/nobility, and will be irrevocably tied to the country's future - so it makes sense that she will now dig into the deepest and most intimate parts of Cordonia's history, and go several steps further in helping to unite the nation.

- Why do I theorize 'patriotism' or 'national integration' as being a theme? There are several reasons for this:

The Unresolved Storylines: We still have a ways to go in understanding Cordonian history. We don't know which other forces were involved in previous assassinations, and we don't have a clue what happened to Liam's mother. All we do know is that other people and groups that we have probably not even seen yet, may have been involved. Francesco (who also knew Liam's mother) and Xinghai, the only foreign delegates/visitors that we got to network with in Book 2, have minimal roles so far but SEEM to have had some influence when they were introduced earlier. Francesco particularly could have some sort of role to play, given what we were told about him in Book 2. Now would be a good time to explore why he needed contacts with these people (other than the fact that Xinghai is Hana's dad). It's possible that nothing will happen and we may not even see these two, or exchange any important information, but I'd still hope that there is some importance to their appearances in Book 2.

The Connections We Made In The Engagement Tour: Meeting Francesco in Capri was related to getting access to EU markets for Cordonian products. The engagement tour itself revolved around grabbing international attention towards Cordonian problems - one of which was the tsunami that hit Portavira, which we learn more about in Book 3. There is a possibility that these threads may be picked up in the future.

Both the above points hint at possible threats, or allies. At this point we can't exactly determine who is friend and who is foe, but it is clear that neighbouring countries - and indeed countries we have associated with in the past - will play a pretty big role in the way we view Cordonia, and in the way we direct the narrative of this country.

The Artwork: I love this part of my theory because it is the most based on actual evidence rather than guesswork. The idea of a nation depends as much on items of familiarity and symbols, as it does on history. It's why countries have national animals, anthems, fruits. Why art depicting national and local legends can often be considered almost sacred. The book has barely even begun yet, and already it is FILLED with all kinds of things symbolic to Cordonia.

Let's first take a peek at the cover art:

Now let's ignore Liam's and Drake's (busted) faces in this cover and focus on what the three are holding.

The MC holds a rattle in her hand, and the jewel within the rattle looks similar to a ruby, which has been associated more than once with apples in the story (Cordonia's most valued variety of apple is the Cordonian Ruby, Liam's wedding gift to the MC is a ruby in the shape of an apple. The same rattle shows up in the second cover [on the left] as well. It's a stretch, I know, but I've got better evidence. Stick with me).

Liam holds a onesie with a crown design on the front - and we know that "for crown and country" is a popular phrase, especially for toasts, in Cordonia. Drake holds out a toy lion: the lion is the national animal, and holds a place of pride in the national Coat-of-Arms. The throne on which the MC herself sits, is blue and gold - both considered national colours. That's at least 4 symbols related to Cordonia vying for our attention on the same cover!

I mean, even Book 3 had just two major symbols - the apple (related to Cordonia) and the phoenix gown (related to Valtoria) - featuring on its cover.

The biggest proof to me, however, is not the cover, but the loading page. To be more precise - what is written above that loading page. A number of Choices books (BB, for instance) write little factoids about the world they are building above the loading bar, which players can read while they're waiting for the chapter to load. This wasn't a common practice with TRR, but they've definitely started it now! Some of the commentary is usual stuff - about gaining advantages through outfits, welcoming you back to Cordonia, etc...but THIS TIME there are tidbits of information given to us as well. And 80% of those involve apples!

Here are a few I managed to catch. One fact on the importance of apples in Cordonian culture, two specifically on the Cordonian Ruby itself including a rare recipe, and two old proverbs (this isn't the only time we've heard apple-related proverbs in the books - in Book 3 for instance, Bertrand refers to their trip to Fydelia as 'slicing two apples with one knife'). Proverbs in general often give us an idea of what people within a region hold up as important, as so connected to their life experiences that they can use those familiar objects as motifs for things that they see in daily life (eg. proverbs in my home state, Kerala, often refer to things/animals we find locally: jasmines, coconuts, jackfruit, dogs, elephants).

The fact that the apple features so often and with such emphasis in the loading page itself - and we have already seen what this simple fruit means to Cordonia - indicates to me that this national symbol - and the idea of the nation itself - will be of great importance. Not only will we be exploring foreign relations, IMO, but we'll also be learning how to build a national narrative that will benefit and strengthen Cordonia.

What's also interesting is that the apple symbolizes fertility to the Cordonian people as well - the apple cutting ceremony during a wedding (as explained by Regina to Leo's fiancée in RoE) is "a symbol of the fruit the tree will bear - you being the tree, of course", and there are chances that the fruit may feature often within the context of pregnancy/having children as well.

• That's all for now, guys. I hope to write more and theorize more as the chapters progress! Until then, I hope you enjoy this one, and I'd love to hear what you have to say.

• I did the Hana screenshots for this chapter, since the first chapter allows me to play repeatedly within losing keys, but I won't be able to do so from Chapter 2 onwards. If there are any Hana fans out there who keep screenshots of scenes in their route and are interested in sharing, I'd love to hear from you and will definitely credit you for the screenshots I put up!

• If you'd like to be tagged in future QTs, please let me know! Tagging @nikkisha16 for now since she asked xD

• Until Saturday, folks!

#long post #trh quick thoughts #the royal heir #trh qts #king liam #liam x mc #hana lee #hana x mc #maxwell beaumont #maxwell x mc #drake walker #drake x mc

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neakco · 4 years

Text

TNA - Ch. 3

Ch. 2

This is the last chapter I will be posting online unless there is any interest in it. I love constructive criticism. I probably should have mentioned this earlier but my computer is broken and everything was typed up on my phone.

Chapter 3

Briar and Azalea entered the Godfrey Enterprises Lobby fifteen minutes before their meeting with Theodore and looked around.

"This place sure has a lot of gold and marble." Briar muttered quietly in Russian.

"You would think this was some cash grab of a casino or hotel." Azalea responded in Urdu.

Approaching the reception Azalea continued to speak in Urdu. "We would like to rent a suite please."

Briar had to turn away so he wouldn't laugh and the poor receptionist's expression.

"I am sorry, but would you be able to repeat that in English?"

Azalea kept her face remarkably straight. "Apologies. We have a meeting with the COO."

The man sighed in relief that she spoke English, "May I please get your names?"

Azalea answered since Briar had barely managed to stop silently laughing. "Briar and Azalea Willowbirch."

The man typed their names into the system before his face paled and his hands began to shake. He slowly looked up at them with false cheerfulness, "I am terribly sorry but you are both banned from the building and I must ask you to leave."

"No worries. Do you mind if we stay just inside the doors as I call our ride?" Azalea smiled brightly but Briar caught the glint of steel in her eyes.

The receptionist visibly relaxed, "Please go ahead."

Briar switched into combining multiple languages once they were close enough to the door, "You would think we were the worst of murderers. So what is our plan?"

"I am going to call our ride." She answered as she pulled out her phone. She then switched over to English for the conversation. "No, I promise we are not running late. In the lobby actually. Apparently we are banned entrance."

Briar heard the sigh.

"We were graciously allowed to stay here while calling for a ride. Though we are now being glanced at suspiciously."

Briar heard a ding and looked towards the opening elevator doors. He grinned as he watched Theo step out and hang up his phone.

"Ms. Willowbirch, I am happy to see you made it. Please grant me a moment to resolve this issue before we head up to my office." He then walked up behind reception and looked over the screen.

Azalea just grinned as she put away her own phone.

"Some ride you called us." Briar smirked.

"I think an elevator ride is still technically a ride, no?" She laughed as the strolled towards the desk.

They were close enough now to hear Theo's quiet conversation with the receptionist.

"You are new so please don't worry about it. Just now you know to check next time."

"Yes sir. Sorry sir."

Theo joined them near the elevator and swiped his badge to call it.

Once the door closed Theo relaxed,

"Apparently you two are highly dangerous and top security is to be called at any sign of you being uncooperative."

"Your father?" Briar asked.

"Just be thankful for the board ruling that he isn't allowed to make any company decisions after an event." The elevator began to slow and Theo again stood straighter, "Follow me and try not to stop."

The twins shared a look but followed silently. They quickly understood as various strong perfumes assailed their senses. A fast look around showed them multiple women wearing heavy masks of makeup and all positioning themselves within Theo's sights. Some seemed enthusiastic in their attempts to garner attention while others seemed like they would rather be doing anything else.

They were almost at their apparent destination when a women physically blocked their path to the door.

"Coffee for your meeting." She fluttered her very long and clearly false lashes.

Azalea blinked slowly, while others wore masks of makeup this women's face appeared to be sculpted of it. She switched to a mix of French and Spanish, "Brother, did we enter a horror cinematic?"

Theo accepted the tray of drinks and ushered them through the door before closing it hastily. "Sadly not a horror, just my life." He then stopped Briar from grabbing one of the drinks. "That women likes to lace things with aphrodisiacs."

Rob laughed from his seat on a side couch near the desk. "Is that the one that tried to feed you bright blue Viagra cookies and claimed they were blueberry?"

Theo sighed wearily as he collapsed in his chair, "That is the one. She just needs one more instance of time fraud and I can finally fire her."

The twins shared a look of concern before taking seats in front of the desk.

"Why can't you just fire her for harassment?" Briar asked with a suppressed shudder.

Rob answered from the couch, "Father's policy, Theo can't fire anyone that father directly hired unless they have 3 non-HR infractions of the same type."

"That isn't fair!" Azalea looked furious and was slipping into an unrecognizable accent, "How did the board allow that?"

"Father has the same restrictions on anyone I hire." Theo passed over a folder, "But you are here to talk business, not hear my problems. I managed to locate your parents arrival to Lattuck after I received your message last night with the date and time your parents initially boarded their train."

Azalea and Briar carefully studied the images as Rob stood up and pointed one out.

"Cameras lost 'em there at Bismark St. Tried to get the cab transcripts but they only uselessly keep those for two months."

"This is more than enough, thank you both greatly." Briar stated as he pulled up a map on his phone and started to marking locations.

Azalea looked at the brothers with a little suspicion, "How did you get this all done in one night?"

Rob grinned, "I stayed up a little late but Theo here came to work at 3 am."

Briar stopped what he was doing and both twins glared slightly at the brothers.

"Trust me you two, it was work on this or spend more time at Godfrey Mansion. We both jumped on the excuse to leave."

"The more I learn about Mr. Godfrey the more I contemplate trace less poisons." Azalea muttered into Briar's shoulder.

"Wait until we locate our own parents before you cause other people's to disappear. I refuse to finish this without you."

Theo chose to ignore the comments, "I am sorry we couldn't find anything more."

Briar laughed, "Are you kidding? We are used to following tattered wisps of month old gossip. This is a great lead."

Rob sat back on the couch, "So why didn't you two just hire a detective? Surely you can afford it."

"There are more than a few reasons but two main ones." Azalea started.

"The first is that our grandfather taught us it is wrong to spend our money for purely selfish reasons. For everything we spend we match it with a doubled donation to charities when we can. It is surprising a lot cheaper to travel and accommodate ourselves compared to hiring a detective." Briar stated.

"And the second is that there were no detectives that took our 16 year old selves seriously enough. Those that did try to humour us were very untrustworthy." Azalea finished.

Rob nodded but before he could respond there was a knock on the door and Roisin entered.

"I know I came in early today Mr. Sapphirus, but I gathered the employee pay statements for you."

"Thank you Ms. Ballantyne. If you wish you can compare them to the time statements online and look for inconsistencies, or you can choose to help the admin staff with their tasks."

Her eyes widened in fright, "I shall work on the comparisons." She smiled briefly at Briar before leaving to return to her tasks.

Rob looked at the door confused, "Shouldn't she be in here working with you?"

"Yes but that requires a desk, and even though I have the space for it I was informed that I am not allowed to move the secretary's desk she is now using in here." Theo let out a growl of frustration, "She apparently has her own desk arriving later today and under no instance shall I bring that one in because it will soon be in use again."

"I may not be an expert, but why does the news of help make you look like you would welcome death?" Azalea asked as Briar began packing away the photos in a small bag.

"Because Father is just going to hire another useless secretary." He sighed.

Rob chose to elaborate for her, "Father got the stupid idea in his head that if he hires enough women that eventually one will seduce Theo here."

Briar looked up rapidly, "What? Why?"

"A few reasons; he wants Theo to work less and figures if he is distracted then he can probably slip some more selfish policies in. He also wants Theo to provide an heir to our family legacy. I don't like women so I am useless to him."

"But adoption is a thing. He adopted both of you." Azalea looked offended.

"True, but he can't have kids. Plus i am sure he adopted Theo because I was such a disappointment. He would probably disown me if the media wouldn't have a field day."

Theo was face down on the desk and mumbled out, "I just wish father could understand that the restrictions he has placed on those women in their contracts causes me more work instead of less. I spend hours after everyone else has left just doing their jobs." Theo lifted his head to look at Rob, "and I don't care what Father says, you are the best older brother I could ask for."

Rob started to jokingly tear up, "Awww, you are adorable little bro, I love you too."

Azalea looked thoughtful and spoke without thinking, "Why do you not just hire your own secretary?"

She jumped as Theo suddenly leapt up and grabbed her hands, "Please say you want a job!"

Azalea looked towards her giggling twin then back towards Theo's hope-filled eyes. "I wasn't, but I have never been a secretary before. What would the job entail?"

Theo let go of her hands and sat back down to start typing, "You are the perfect fit. I saw first hand that you are skilled at data entry, You have told me before that you helped with your family’s own company when you could, you can be polite to the point that you could probably insult someone and they would thank you. Plus I feel I can trust you not to gossip about company secrets." He grinned as he handed her the contract he just printed off. "And the best part is that hiring you would annoy my father and he can't do anything about it."

Azalea looked up from the paperwork, "Administrative Assistant / Bodyguard?"

"Brilliant right?" Theo grinned, "You would be in charge of the entire Administrations Department, thus granting you access to the whole company’s files. Then by doubling as my bodyguard I get to take you to all my off-site meetings with high-end clients and contacts."

"You are granting me opportunities to find my parents while assisting you?" She looked a little stunned.

"Yes and if you look here," Theo came to her side of the desk to point some things out.

Rob took the opportunity to tap Briar on the shoulder, "While Petal is getting an offer I have one for you."

Briar looked at Rob curiously, "What kind?"

He pulled out a business card, "I own and run Umbra Security. I am need of an eye in the sky. Someone I can trust to run cameras and comms for me and my crew."

"I feel special, but you only met me last night. Why trust me?"

Rob pulled Briar over to the couch and sat him down. "I didn't last night, thought you were pulling a long game. So I did a bit of digging and found your family over in Germany. Your story checked out. The main reason though is that the job will give you access to all the public cams in town and some private ones when we got a special job. A handful of cash won't be enough to bribe you to look away and potentially lose that access."

Briar looked carefully at Rob's face, "Do you seriously not have anyone on cameras already? I refuse to put anyone out of a job just for a golden egg."

Rob took a moment to puzzle out Briar's meaning. "Just another reason you are trustworthy. Now normally I run 'em but sometimes I need to watch my crew around higher paying jobs. Last night could 'ave been avoided if I had an eye. Sometimes I get my man on cams but he is a twig and couldn't win a fight with a kitten." Rob's look grew more serious. "It is rare but sometimes thugs go after the cams. I know that I won't have to worry about anyone getting the drop on you."

"I will take the job on two conditions." Briar held up a finger, "I refuse to use a gun." He held up a second, "I am allowed to upgrade or change the room's security and equipment to suit me."

"What kind of changes?"

"Currently I am only thinking adding a pin pad and hand scanner combo that only looks like it will unlock the door." Briar grinned, "I will probably think of more things once I see the space."

"A red herring." Rob muttered before exclaiming, "I approve." He then held out his hand to shake, "All I ask is that you don't install anything deadly."

Briar shook, "You have a deal Mr. Umbra."

"Excellent, I can start you with Monday, Wednesday and Friday. Tonight can be the first shift if you want."

"Sounds good to me, where am I going?"

"It's a little hard to find, so tell me your address and I will swing by before 1900 to lead ya."

"Tranquil Estate." Briar laughed as Rob's eyes widened, "I know I know, my grandfather has the good taste not to name his properties after himself."

Rob laughed with him, "At least one business tycoon in the world does."

Briar looked over to see Azalea trying to fit a large bundle of papers into her bag.

Theo spotted his questioning look and explained, "Welcome package. It has everything she needs in order to annoy my father by following all the rules to a tee. It also includes her own badge so she doesn't need me to call the elevator."

Azalea stood up after succeeding in making everything fit. "If that is everything then I believe I shall go prepare for the battle to make your tower more bearable princess."

"Just don't stab any of the guards, they are prisoners too." Theo spoke through barely restrained laughter.

"No promises." Azalea waved, "See you tomorrow Theo."

Rob left first followed by Azalea and Briar. The latter leaned on his twin and whispered in Italian, " Grandfather would approve."

She chose not to respond verbally and instead shoved him off and went to wait for the elevator with Rob.

Briar chose that brief moment to greet Roisin and see if she would be free that Thursday.

Azalea waved him over when the doors opened and he rushed over with a large grin.

Azalea shook her head, "Come on Romeo, straighten your head back on, we have work to do."

And that is it. This honestly started as a maribat fanfic with Briar as Adrien and Azalea as Marinette. Rob was Jason and Theodore was Tim. Since I made it into an original I changed a lot of personalities and background characters. All because I wanted to twist the fake dating idea completely. Somehow it turned into a commentary on stereotypes and how it is okay to just be how you are. This covers gender stereotypes and relationship stereotypes. My favourite chapters I have written so far are chapter 7 because I have never written anything like it before and chapters 11 to 14 because they are the serious ones that made me decide to turn this into an original. So again, if you want to see more let me know, if I don’t hear anything you will just have to wait the ten plus years it takes me to get this published.

#Truths of the New Atypical #TNA #Briar Willowbirch #Azalea Willowbirch #original story #original writing #chapter 3

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