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#Harry Potter Qoutes
billi-mausi · 1 year
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So I might have written a Jegulus fic on this.
This is how you fall in love by adorexmoony
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edmetalqueer · 10 months
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Sirius, high out of his mind; would you two kill me if I had sex with a wand-
Remus, staring at him; What the fuck- Pads, where do you get this shit from?
M/N, taking another joint; How'd you even have sex with a wand? Where'd you put it?
Remus; I'm starting to think this marijuana aint working on me.
Sirius; What's a hippopotato
Remus; Yup, that's it, I'm going to bed, good night.
M/N & Sirius; NO, YOUR NOT.
Remus; YES I FUCKING AM, GOOD NIGHT.
M/N & Sirius jumping onto Remus bed; Not without us.
Remus; Fine-
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Sirius: if the moon is made of cheese and saturn is six, how many pancakes could you eat on Mars?
James: yellow
Sirius: the correct answer is packing peanuts
James: oh i see, bcs you carry the two and-
Remus: what is wrong with you people?!
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bewsworld · 6 months
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“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?”
-Albus Dumbledore
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evansisasadist · 1 year
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Hermione: I want Harry in the bridal party
Ron: And I want him to be my best man
*both glaring at each other*
Harry: *nervously backing away*
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haiitzmeh · 2 years
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Drarry Incorrect Qoute #1
Harry: So you just put it in the hole but try not to shove it in
Harry: It hurts when you do it at first
Harry: try to put it in gently, you can do it rough if you want though
Harry: also putting it in the hole too hard might cause bleeding
Draco: oh , that's how you do it, thank you love
Pansy: *slams door open* OMG ARE YOU TEACHING DRACO TO DO THE DEED
Harry: no! I'm teaching him to make a plug for when your nose is runny... duh
Harry: what made you possibly think that?
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jade-eclipse-li · 7 months
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Hagrid’s Christmas fudge is disgusting, but not even Snape had the heart to tell
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ridiculouspickles · 5 months
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bigolidioot · 1 year
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The marauders and things my friends have said P.1
Sirius: Heard back from my therapist! I have ptsd!!!
*does a little dance*
Everyone: *cheers*
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caitspoetry222 · 11 months
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I’ve known no such things as friends
I’ve had “friends” but not friends
People who say they love you, but do things loved ones wouldn’t do
What does a true friend mean
And will I ever know?
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djcanipe99 · 1 year
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Grover ,Ron : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?
Percy,Harry: Allow me to explain.
Grover,Ron : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.
Percy,Harry: Right, you've had your fun.
Grover,Ron : What's she after, anyway?
Percy,Harry: It's time to press on.
Grover,Ron: What could she possibly need?
Percy,Harry : It doesn't matter.
Grover,Ron : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.
Percy,Harry : That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.
Grover,Ron : I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.
Grover,Ron: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.
Percy,Harry: Midget.
Grover,Ron : So you agree?
Percy,Harry: No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.
Grover,Ron : I've said too much. I've upset you.
Percy,Harry: No, I am simply stating that one has...
Grover,Ron: What were you doing?
Percy,Harry: Will you allow me to explain?
Grover,Ron: I wish you would.
Ned,Rhodey : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?
Peter,Tony : Allow me to explain.
Rhodey, Ned : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.
Peter,Tony: Right, you've had your fun.
Ned,Rhodey : What's she after, anyway?
Peter,Tony : It's time to press on.
Ned,Rhodey : What could she possibly need?
Peter,Tony : It doesn't matter.
Ned,Rhodey : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.
Peter,Tony: That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.
Ned,Rhodey: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.
Ned,Rhodey: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.
Peter,Tony : Midget.
Ned,Rhodey: So you agree?
Peter,Tony : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.
Ned,Rhodey: I've said too much. I've upset you.
Peter,Tony: No, I am simply stating that one has...
Ned,Rhodey : What were you doing?
Peter,Tony: Will you allow me to explain?
Ned,Rhodey: I wish you would.
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki: Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?
Luffy,natsu, naruto and izuku :Allow me to explain.
Gray,Zorro ,Sasuke and katsuki: Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.
Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: Right, you've had your fun.
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki:What's she after, anyway?
Luffy, natsu , naruto and izuku :It's time to press on.
Gray,Zorro, sasuke and katsuki : What could she possibly need?
Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: It doesn't matter.
Gray,Zorro sasuke and katsuki:An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.
Luffy, natsu naruto and izuku:That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.
Gray,Zorro , sasuke and katsuki : I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.
Luffy, natsu ,naruto and Izuku: Midget.
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : So you agree?
Luffy, natsu, naruto and izuku : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki:I've said too much. I've upset you.
Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku: No, I am simply stating that one has...
Gray,Zorro , sasuke and katsuki : What were you doing?
Luffy, natsu ,naruto and izuku : Will you allow me to explain?
Gray,Zorro ,sasuke and katsuki : I wish you would.
Zach : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?
Will: Allow me to explain.
Zach : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.
Will : Right, you've had your fun.
Zach : What's she after, anyway?
Will : It's time to press on.
Zach : What could she possibly need?
Will : It doesn't matter.
Zach: An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.
Will : That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.
Zach: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.
Zach: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.
Will : Midget.
Zach: So you agree?
Will : No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.
Zach : I've said too much. I've upset you.
Will : No, I am simply stating that one has..
Zach : What were you doing?
Will : Will you allow me to explain?
Zach : I wish you would.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : Why is the only woman you've cared about a criminal? Are you a masochist?
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Allow me to explain.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : Allow me. She's the only adversary who ever outsmarted you. Twice. Made a proper idiot out of you.
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Right, you've had your fun.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : What's she after, anyway?
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: It's time to press on.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : What could she possibly need?
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: It doesn't matter.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : An alibi? A beard? A human canoe. She could sit on your back and paddle you up the Thames.
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: That's of no consequence to you, is it? We've done our last case together.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: I've already read it. Missing person: Luke Reordan, 4 foot 10, red hair, no front teeth.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: Case solved. You're obviously not her type. She likes ginger dwarves.
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Midget.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : So you agree?
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: No, I don't agree. It's more than technicality, you see. You're misrepresenting the dimensions of foreshortened peoples.
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud : I've said too much. I've upset you.
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: No, I am simply stating that one has...
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: What were you doing?
Lok, Danny,Ron and jake: Will you allow me to explain?
Dante, tucker ,wade and spud: I wish you would.
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Draco: When I had a crush on a boy for the first time, I didn't know what to do so I sent him a letter that said 'get out of my school' Harry: That was you?!!!
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embeccy · 5 months
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"The Great Hall looked magnificent. Not only were there a dozen frost-covered Christmas trees and thick streamers of holly and mistletoe crisscrossing the ceiling, but enchanted snow was falling, warm and dry from the ceiling."
- J.K. Rowling
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billi-mausi · 2 years
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<3
‘Cause we were just kids (when we fell in love)
(Jegulus fluff with No voldemort, No magic, Jegulus grow up together (neighbours.))
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goingphyco · 8 months
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“I hope you’re all pleased with yourselves. We could’ve all been killed- or worse expelled!” -Hermione Granger
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beam-of-sunlightbb · 6 months
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Reference: First hand experience of US journalist Abby Martin who visited West Bank on Joe Rogan podcast.
P.S: The fact that this has been going on for the past 75 years!!
#educate yourself before forming an opinion
#be on the right side of history
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