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daisynik7 · 6 months

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Hi are you still doing song requests? If so can you do Make You Feel My Love by Adele for Toji? 🥹 please and thank you ☺️

Make You Feel My Love

Part Two to Photograph

Pairing: Toji Fushiguro x f!reader

Word Count: ~2.3k

cw: fluff, explicit language, basically all fluff lol

Summary: Toji Fushiguro is nothing like his previous self. He’s become hardened, almost completely desensitized through the years, being used and abused by his own family, the Zenin clan. After the loss of his first wife, Toji takes his son and decides to finally run away to the only place where he can feel like his true self again: home. There, he reunites with a familiar face.

Author’s Notes: Thank you for this request for the y2k karaoke party! I thought it’d be perfect as a continuation to this story. I hope you enjoy! Thank you for reading. Divider credits to @/cafekitsune.

“Zenin?”

Your voice is soft, almost breathless, when you utter his name as he stands between the door frame of your classroom, hands in his pockets, a shy expression on his face. “Uh, yeah. It’s me. I go by Fushiguro now.”

You look between him and Megumi, spotting the similarities instantly. The jet-black hair, the same-colored eyes, almost identical facial structure. A spitting image of his father, who stands before you, much bigger than when you last saw him, but certainly the same boy who’s grown into a man. There isn’t time to catch up as your students file in, greeting their new classmate politely at his desk. Toji clears his throat, stepping aside to make room for the kids to walk in. “I’ll be back later to pick up the kid, if you want to catch up.”

The kid. You hide your giggles, pleased to hear that he still sounds like the same Toji you knew many years ago. His eyes light up at your laughter; he doesn’t remember the last time he heard a genuine one like yours. Sweet, pure, and music to his ears.

The bell rings, and that’s his cue to leave. There isn’t much to do throughout the day, considering he is now unemployed. He’s tempted to resort to old habits and head to the racetrack to gamble on horses, but instead, he goes to the public library to use a computer, searching for job openings around the area. The day passes quickly and it’s time for him to pick up Megumi. He waits outside, watching as all the other children run towards their parents, most of whom eye him with wary expressions. He’s gotten used to lingering glances like this, aware of his intimidating presence. It doesn’t bother him anymore; he’s used to being seen as some sort of monster. And with what he’s done during his life as a Zenin, maybe he is.

Megumi is the last outside, hand-in-hand with you, his teacher. You both give him a wave, your eyes twinkling with kindness and a bright smile. You’re the only one who looks at Toji like this. The only one who sees him as human. When you approach him, he places his hand on Megumi’s head, ruffling his hair. “How was it?”

His son grins, giving his father a thumbs up.

“You made some new friends, right Megumi?” you say, squeezing his hand. “What are their names?”

In his squeaky voice, he replies, “Yuji and Nobara.”

Toji smirks. “Friends already? That’s great, bud. I knew you’d like it here.”

Megumi lets go of you, holding onto his dad’s wrist. “Yuji said he’s getting ice cream down the street with his grandpa. Can we go too?”

“Of course,” Toji responds. He looks to you, tipping his head to the side. “Want to join us?”

~~~

You’re sitting in a booth across from the Fushiguros, who share the biggest chocolate fudge sundae they could order off the menu. Eventually, Megumi spots his new pink-haired friend and asks if they can play at the mini arcade together in the back of the shop, to which Toji agrees, passing him money. Now, you’re alone with him, hundreds of questions you want to ask, but are too nervous to. You sip on your milkshake, unsure where to begin.

Fortunately, he speaks first. “Did you stay in Tokyo this entire time?”

You shake your head. “I went to university overseas, then I moved back.”

“Overseas, huh? Sounds fun,�� he muses, scooping a big bite into his mouth.

“How about you? Where did you go?” The last memory you have of him is the distraught look on his face, after you shared a kiss together. The next day, he was gone.

He licks the back of his spoon, collecting all the chocolate off. “Here and there. But mostly there.”

“You were still in Tokyo?” You try not to sound outraged. Deep down, you’re hurt by the way the two of you parted. And if he was truly here all along, you’re even more upset, knowing he had all this time to apologize. Years and years, you wondered if all the little moments you shared together were just that, or something more. Even now, finally meeting him in the flesh, you’re uncertain where you stand with him.

He senses your uneasiness, sitting up straight to explain. “The Zenins relocated to a more remote location up in the mountains in order to carry out their dirty deeds. I dropped out of school and started working full time as their lackey. I was often sent to Tokyo for duties.” He spreads his fingers, presenting his hands towards you, calloused and scarred from overwork and guilt. “I’ve done things that I am not proud of. Hurt people that didn’t deserve it. I didn’t want to do it, but at the time, I had no other choice.”

You listen to him intently, sipping on your milkshake slowly, giving him your undivided attention as he continues his story.

“Me and Megumi’s mom had an arranged marriage. The Zenins wanted me to produce an heir once my father’s health started to decline. She was a kind woman, the closest thing I had to an escape. But still, the both of us were trapped. It didn’t matter that we had each other; we were both under the wills of our families.”

“After a few months of trying, she got pregnant. Our lives felt normal during this time. Like we were a regular family. Me, her, Megumi in her belly. My father left us alone. He wanted to make sure I was taking good care of her so that our son would come out strong and healthy. And he did. He was the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.”

Toji takes a deep breath, the both of you anticipating this next part. “It was a home birth, per my father’s request. I should have said something from the start, but I didn’t think anything would go wrong. After Megumi was delivered, the bleeding wouldn’t stop.” He swallows hard, throat tight with emotion. “And by the time the ambulance arrived, she was gone.”

He avoids your gaze, staring hard at the metal container filled with napkins on the side of the table. You’re tempted to reach for his hand, to offer comfort, but you decide against it, deeming it inappropriate.

“My family couldn’t care less. All that mattered to them is that they had their new heir. They didn’t even cry when she passed away.” His jaw is clenched tight, hands in fists, trembling against the table’s surface. “Heartless bastards, all of them. I should have left with Megumi then, but I didn’t. I was a fucking coward, too scared to face the world alone. And with a little baby at that.”

“Why did you decide to finally leave?” you ask.

“They were going to start training Megumi how to fight. He’s only five-years-old, for fuck’s sake. He’s the gentlest, sweetest kid, and they want him to become like me. I didn’t want that. I don’t want Megumi to have the life I did, not if I can help it.” He unclenches his fists, relaxing into his seat, spooning whatever melted ice cream remains into his mouth.

You lean forward, resting your elbows on the table. “Why did you decide to come back here?”

He doesn’t respond right away, pretending to be preoccupied with the swirly mess of sweet cream in front of him. He contemplates how best to explain himself. If he admits the truth, it may come off too strong. The reason he’s returned home is because of you. The photo of you and him smiling on the beach a decade ago is in his pocket, wrinkled and faded from years of yearning. He had dreamt of this day ever since he left, hoping the next time you reunite, he’ll be free of the Zenin name. Free to do as he pleases, free to love who he wants. And now that day has come, he’s just as nervous as he expected he'd be.

Not wanting to make a fool of himself, he says, “I know this area well. Figured it’d be a good place for us to start fresh.”

You smile at him. “If you and Megumi ever need anything, please don’t hesitate to ask. I’d like to help you in any way I can.”

“Megumi is a good kid. Quiet, but good. He doesn’t give me any trouble, so he makes it easy.”

“So nothing like his father, then?” you tease, raising a brow at him.

He chuckles. “Like I said, I’ll make sure of that.”

You reach for him, resting your hand on top of his. “You’re not all bad. You’re pretty great, remember?”

Instantly, you’re taken back ten years ago, moments before that kiss. Electricity sparks between you; his hand shifts beneath yours, his palm turned up now, fingertips brushing lightly against the delicate skin of your wrist. He gazes at you, smiling. The prominent scar across his lips more titillating than it’s ever been before. “Yeah, I remember.”

Before either of you can do anything more, Megumi returns to the table, head drenched in sweat, breathing heavily. He grabs the water cup on the table, chugging it aggressively, wiping his mouth with the hem of his t-shirt, fresh from a rousing game of Dance Dance Revolution against his new best friend.

~~~

Toji picks up Megumi every single day after school. He’s adamant about it, claiming it’s important for him to spend as much time with his son as possible, something he never experienced growing up. He accepts a job in construction, working early morning shifts in order to be outside the school steps promptly.

A few nights a week, he invites you to their apartment for dinner, where you help him cook simple recipes like fried rice or noodles, even little treats like rice balls for Megumi’s school snack. This Thursday night, you stay until bedtime, watching from the doorway as Toji tucks in his son, a small grin on his face, studying the way his eyelashes flutter into a deep slumber. Sound asleep, he sneaks out, closing the door quietly.

You check the time on your phone, disappointed that it’s getting late. “I should head home.”

He walks you to the exit. “Megumi is going to Yuji’s house for a sleepover tomorrow night.”

So far, Toji has kept his distance from you, though you’ve notice subtle glances here and there. You haven’t exactly been forward yourself, too nervous to make the first move or misunderstand what could be friendship and nothing more. Toji feels the same way, unsure if his feelings are reciprocated or if you’re simply this nice of a person. Hopefully, it’s both.

Your heart beats faster, not sure what you’re supposed to do with this information, waiting for him to elaborate. He clears his throat. “I want to take you out to dinner, to thank you for all that you’ve done for us.”

“You really don’t have to.”

“I want to,” he insists, smiling.

The following night, he arrives at your house, dressed in a flattering button-up and slacks, greeting your parents formally for the first time in over a decade. They remember him fondly, excited to see him all grown-up. He takes you to a restaurant downtown, ordering the most popular items on the menu to share between you, enjoying each other’s company as you always do. After dessert, he invites you to his house for a nightcap, and you’re a little too keen when you agree. While you wait for the water to boil in the tea kettle, you sit beside him on the couch, looking through pictures of him and Megumi on his phone.

“We went to the beach the first weekend we moved in,” he says, showing a selfie of the two of them sitting on the sand.

You nudge him in the arm with your elbow. “Remember that school project?”

He grins, leaning into you. “How could I forget?” He glances at your lips, then into your eyes, inching even closer. You gravitate towards him, holding your breath, ready to kiss. Then, the tea kettle whistles, ruining the moment.

Chuckling, he stands up to remove it from the stove. You sit back into the couch, sighing, body tingling and flustered. He returns shortly with a hot mug of tea in his hands, setting it on the coffee table. “You should let it cool. It’s too hot right now.” He sinks into the cushion beside you, knee brushing yours.

“Did you like me back? When we first kissed?” It’s one of the many questions still unanswered, and you decide that now is the best time to find out the truth.

He smiles, grasping your hand gently. “Yes.”

You lock your fingers with his, filling in the spaces seamlessly. “Then why did you lie to me?”

“I didn’t think it’d be safe for you to be associated with me. Not while I was still a Zenin.” He pulls you forward, wrapping your arms around his broad shoulders, noses nearly touching now.

“And where’s the picture of us?” you whisper, nuzzling your nose to his, wanting so badly to close the distance.

“I took it. I’ve had it this whole time,” he admits, brushing his lips to yours. You kiss him fully, his grip around your waist, no signs of letting you go anytime soon. You make love to each other right there on his couch, your hot tea forgotten on the coffee table, cold by the time you remember it the next morning.

For the first time in his life, Toji doesn’t feel dangerous. He doesn’t feel like a monster or a threat. As he marvels at your peaceful form cradled delicately in his arms, Toji Fushiguro feels normal. He feels loved.

#toji fushiguro #toji x reader #toji x you #fushiguro toji x reader #fushiguro toji x you #toji fushiguro x reader #toji fushiguro x you #toji fushiguro fluff #toji fluff #toji fic #jjk fluff #jujutsu kaisen fluff #jjk x reader #jujutsu kaisen x reader #y2k karaoke party #milestone event

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himegureisu · 1 month

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Time

Summary: Your love language is quality time. However, your husband is the King of Mirkwood.

A/N: I was supposed to write a Mycroft Holmes/Female Reader. However, this idea popped up and went brr in my head and then my fingers. I needed to finish it before it went so here it goes my first for this pairing I hope you enjoy! (And good night for me because it’s 4AM also not proofread)

Pairing: Thranduil x Female Elf Reader

——————————— 🍃 ———————————

“What was it, meleth nín?” Thranduil asked, “I apologize our time is to be cut short again,”

It was the nth time someone interrupted your strolls to whisk him away for a matter of utmost significance and to be honest, you were tired of it.

Trying so desperately to take time between the day to see him. To get a moment of his time.

He was a King.

A title that holds responsibilities he could not neglect. You know that. However, you didn’t expect to be pushed aside.

“It’s nothing,” you fake a smile, “You should go they need you,”

But I need you too.

You didn’t try after that.

Your handmaiden noticed your melancholy days after the incident. It was like he didn’t notice you were gone.

Yes, you did eat together most of the time. However, you didn’t pop by his office during your free time. You didn’t leave snacks anymore for him to munch on when he forgets to eat. You didn’t propose to walk so you could both stretch your legs. You didn’t wait for him to go to bed.

Contrary to your belief, your husband did notice your absence.

His days were often tedious and tiring. Your short visits were always something he looked forward to. The bright spot to his days so when palace staff gossip came through his ears…

“The Queen seems pale. Is she ill?” a soft feminine voice asked in concern,

“Oh, why would she be ill?” a different voice, an ellon this time, “Maybe she’s expecting a child!”

“She could be ill because of the child.” the elleth remarks, as another joins in the conversation,

“The Queen is not expecting I would know.”your handmaiden divulged as much, No, she seems dejected.”

“The King has been busy…”

Her words echoed in his mind because it was true. His thoughts wandered to those moments your times were constantly interrupted and the day you last visited.

Oh.

“Where is the Queen?” he asks your handmaiden, who exited the study, a book on hand for you.

“At the gardens, My Lord,” she simply answered.

“That’s for her?” he gestured to the book, she nods meekly, “I’ll take it to her. Go tend to your other duties,”

Your handmaiden scurries off in fear and intimidation to go prepare your clothes for the evening. On the other hand, your husband quickly makes his way to the gardens where he couldn’t see you.

“By Valar,” he mumbles frustratedly, walking through the foliage, “Where are you?”

Your soft sniffles give you away.

Between two trees, there was a hammock tied on to their sturdy barks. On the hammock, beneath a thick blanket, you hug his pillow as your tears fell down your cheeks.

From outside your cocoon, the grass crackle as slow footsteps approach your hideout.

Your book finally.

“Did you find that book I asked for?”

“I did,”

A different voice answered. One you haven’t heard from in what seemed like days. His voice.

“Meleth nín,” he breathed out, “Please do not hide from me,”

“I’m hardly presentable,” you sniffed, wiping your tears away, as the hammock tilts a bit on one side, “Aren’t you supposed to be in a meeting of sorts?”

“No,” he frowns, sitting on the edge of the fabric, the book left on by his side, “I don’t care if you’re presentable or not. I’m not the kingdom,”

Slowly, you emerge from your shell to be greeted by his silver eyes, dull in color much like your own has been these past couple of weeks.

“Oh, meleth,”

There were dark shadows beneath your eyes. Your cheeks were stained with dry tears and nose flush from mucus buildup. His heart twisted beneath his chest at the sight of you.

What has he done?

“Oh, meleth nín,” he said, taking you in his arms for a warm embrace you missed, “I’m sorry. I am a fool,”

He hated being the cause of your tears.

“You were,” your voice cracked, as you tuck yourself beneath his chin savoring his presence, “I missed you so much,”

“I missed you too,” he kisses your forehead, and pulls you closer, “I’m sorry that I didn’t reach out, didn’t make the time, made you cry, made you feel like this…”

Your tears fall once again down your cheeks to his robes. He noticed. He noticed your absence after all.

“You are my starlight, my reason to go on,” he softly declared, “I promise I’ll try to do better,”

“I’m sorry I didn’t tell you what I needed” you quietly admit, “I thought I’d be bother you already do so much,”

“You are never a bother,” he adamantly says, glancing down to see you also looking at him, “You are always welcome to whisk me away from the duties of court. I’d rather you than them.”

“Their needs are much more important than mine,” you say.

“But your needs are the most important to me,” his words caused your heart to flutter in the most endearing ways. “You are the most important to me. You do not need to vie for my time or attention. You will always have it. Though, I may not notice it at times you should not hesitate to tell me.”

“If so, can we just stay like this?” you breathed out tiredly against his chest, your ear to his heart beating soundly beneath, “I just… need you,”

“We can,” he gently kisses your forehead, as your eyelids droop down, “It would be a pleasure,”

“Thranduil,” you softly whisper, as he places his forgotten pillow beneath your heads, “Gi melin,”

“Gi melin, meleth nín,” his fingers tuck a stray strand of your hair behind your ear as you settled on his chest, “Sleep. I will be here when you wake,”

It wasn’t long until you did.

Your breaths soft and even as Thranduil gently places the book on the ground so neither of you gets stabbed by its’ edges. He pulls you the closest he could, you unconsciously grasp tight.

Just the way you both liked it.

He lays there quietly observing the heavens, where scattered white clouds and birds of the realm adorned the blue skies, wondering how he was so lucky to have fallen for a second time to you.

He didn’t know what time it was and frankly, he didn’t care when his eyes slowly surrendered to the thrall of slumber joining you in blissful rest for the afternoon.

He would do better. He was going to do better. For you.

#fanfiction #thranduil x reader #thranduil #thranduil x you #thranduil oropherion #lotr x reader #the hobbit x reader #thranduil fanfiction #lord of the rings fanfiction #the hobbit fanfiction #the hobbit #lord of the rings

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blakeswritingimagines · 3 months

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Dating Yandere Superman Would Include:

As a Yandere he loves deeply and would do almost anything to protect you even if it ends up with someone getting hurt. He can be violent and can be obsessive and possessive but the one thing that defines him is how much he loves you.

He can be quite possessive and jealous. He might stalk you or even physically intimidate you. He would also likely have unhealthy coping mechanisms such as stalking, obsessing, and even violence.

He wants your affection and needs to be close to you always being with you and holding you. Anyone who comes near you or your friends will feel his presence and his desire to claim you as his.

He tends to be violent and unpredictable sometimes he's not himself as a Yandere, he hurts others because he sees them as threats or obstacles getting in his way of love. He would do anything to 'protect' you at all costs even if it’s unethical and wrong.

He can be controlling and paranoid. He tends to believe if he lets you out of his sight that someone else will steal you away or worse. He has a habit of trying to keep tabs on you and making sure you are alright even if that includes tapping into your things.

He can be manipulative to get his way. But he does love and care for you deep down. If you don't like him anymore or if you move on from him, he's capable of becoming unstable and not taking it well and he can become very dangerous to himself.

He can be both clingy and possessive. He would go as far as hurting himself just to make you worry about him. He can be very impulsive and unpredictable. He has no problem destroying or getting rid of anything or anyone that stands in the way of his love.

He is a devoted, possessive lover with a penchant for violent outbursts. He loves intensely, hates with every fiber of his being, and will do anything to ensure that your interest remains his. His violent outbursts tend to be targeted towards those whom he considers a threat to his love for you, though he has been known to direct it inward at himself as well.

He enjoys spending time alone with the person he loves, and enjoys taking care of you. He can be very controlling, demanding that you follow his rules and desires, and becoming enraged when his authority is challenged. He sees no problem using guilt trips and emotional blackmail to get his way.

Before getting together, once he sets his sights on you he feels as if he's a hopeless romantic and can be rather manipulative when it comes to acquiring and maintaining said love. He's not above using his powers of seduction to ensnare hearts, and he can be quite persistent in his efforts to convince you to return his feelings.

He is loyal, protective, and extremely territorial. His obsessive love and possessive nature can manifest in a variety of ways, making him both an exhilarating and dangerous romantic partner.

He will do anything and everything to ensure that you never leave him, even if it means using less-than-honorable methods. He is deeply insecure and often takes this out on those around him. His violent outbursts can be unpredictable and sometimes even unprovoked. He tends to be controlling and manipulative, using guilt trips and other psychological tactics to ensure that you stay with him. On the bright side, he is extremely devoted and faithful to you and will go to extraordinary lengths to please you.

When he's on a date with you, he is obsessed with being with you alone, having your attention solely for himself, and making sure that you enjoy your time together. You are the only one he cares about and he wants you to feel as special as you make him feel. He will take you to your favorite restaurants, activities, or just anywhere you would like to go. He doesn't let anyone or anything get in the way of your time together.

Affection for you is his absolute life and essence. He will be overwhelmingly sweet and tender to you, showering you with endless hugs and kisses. He will be your safe haven and never let you go. He will do everything in his power to make you happy and make sure you never have to want for anything else. He will never stop loving you.

If you were to try and leave him, he would not allow it. He would hunt you down and bring you back by any means necessary. You are his, he feels you have no right to leave him and you have no right to be happy anywhere but in his arms.

Punishment to you is something that he will never do, as you are perfect in his eyes and deserve nothing but the best. However, if you were to act against his wishes, he would find ways to make up for your misdeed with endless pampering and affection. However, if someone were to harm or try to hurt you, he would spare no time and exact a harsh punishment on whoever dared to threaten you.

Punishment for those who try to harm or cause any ill will towards you would be swift and harsh. He would not stop until whoever was responsible for such a deed was dead and gone.

Rewards for you would involve constant love, affection, and pampering, but with a touch of domination. You will be treated like royalty and given everything he has to offer, but you will also be reminded, in many subtle ways, that you belong to him and it would be foolish for you to forget it.

His marriage to his soulmate would be a glorious affair, a day he has dreamed of and looked forward to for his entire life or at when he met you. He would make sure that every detail was perfect, down to the last decoration. The passionate love and joy he would feel would reverberate throughout the world and light the skies with shining brightness. He would devote his entire self to making the day as special and joyful as possible, and his love for you would be the focal point of it all.

Hair-pulling: He likes pulling and playing with your hair during sex or foreplay.

Rough Play: He likes it when things get kinky and wild, with elements of aggressiveness and dominance.

Power Exchange: He likes it when you give him control over you, allowing him to tell you what to do and how to behave.

Voyeurism: He enjoys watching you perform in front of him, such as stripping or performing some sort of sexual act.

Humiliation: He likes it when you degrade him in some way, making him feel embarrassed or humiliated and smaller.

#superman x reader #clark kent x reader #yandere superman #dc comics #yandere clark kent #yandere dc #dating would include #tw yandere #yandere

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ichorai · 1 year

Text

as it was ; logan howlett.

track seven of WASTELAND, BABY!

pairing ; logan howlett x mutant!scientist!gn!reader

synopsis ; you first met logan as weapon x, wiped clean of any memory of his past life. he had nearly killed you then. and now, almost two years later, he’s pressing kisses over the very same scars his adamantium claws had inflicted.

words ; 9.1k

themes ; angst, fluff, action, mutant au, scientist au

warnings / includes ; descriptions of violence and gore, death, blood and injuries, alcohol, smoking, emotions™, logan calls you 'bub' and 'darlin', reader has the ability to manipulate matter, reader is a scientist, based on marvel comics presents: weapon x issues #72-84, mentions of the brotherhood and the rest of the x-men, charles is your bff :D, not accurate x-men timelines </3

main masterlist.

You pressed your knuckles into your tired eyes, wincing when bright colors exploded behind your eyelids. Gingerly, you blinked to adjust back to the brightness of the laboratory’s artificial lights, stifling a wide yawn with the back of your palm.

It was your shift to watch him. Weapon X.

Everything was deathly silent, other than the rhythmic beeping of the machine in front of you. The machine that told you he was still alive. Still breathing.

You shifted in the leather chair, swallowing the uncomfortable lump in your throat.

The man—was he even a man anymore?—laid motionless and limp within the vat. His features, softened with unconsciousness, were still rugged and intimidating, nearly hidden by the hundreds of wires sticking out of his form.

They brought you in just a week ago, so you were still getting used to everything here. The other scientists in the facility had told you that the man was a volunteer for the Weapon X project—that he needed to be given an adamantium skeleton or his own mutation would kill him from the inside out. Being a mutant-in-hiding yourself, you felt a certain calling to help him out.

So if you were helping this man recover, why did it feel so wrong?

Biting the side of your cheek, you slipped out of the chair and strode up to the vat, resting a hand on the glass barrier. It was cold beneath your fingertips.

You could’ve sworn you saw his foot twitch—

The door to the lab whooshed open, and the head scientist, Dr. Cornelius, strode in, shooting you a humorless look, wordlessly telling you that your shift was over.

Pursing your lips, you pulled yourself away from the glass, sparing the man in the vat one last glance before stepping back to the chair to gather your things.

“Anything interesting to note?” the old man asked you.

You clicked your tongue against your teeth. “Nothing at all for the past couple of hours, Doc. He’s responding exceptionally well to the chemical bath.”

He made a disinterested noise, as if the prospect of things going well bored him, before sinking into another chair and heaving a large sigh.

Hesitant, you stepped forward to ask, “Doctor? Sorry, I was just wondering if I could ask you some questions.” It was about time you knew just what was going on here—there was definitely something that he wasn’t telling you.

The man lifted his gaze to you, seeming annoyed already. “What is it?” A scowl threatened to play by the corner of your lips, but you forced on an indifferent expression.

“I just… I keep thinking about him.”

“Who? Logan?”

His name was Logan. He had a name. Well—of course he did. You suddenly felt sick.

“Yeah. I keep thinking about what we’re doing to him.”

The doctor narrowed his eyes in suspicion, but wisely chose to remain silent, goading you to carry on.

The machine beeped. You glanced at the unconscious man in the vat.

“Before I came here… was he—was Logan—here? And I don’t mean him as Weapon X. I mean it like the man before this. Was he here?”

“No,” Cornelius replied, far too quickly for your liking. He averted his gaze, focusing on the machine in front of him. “I don’t know. What are you asking here, kid?”

This time, you didn’t bother to suppress the frown budding across your face. “I mean,” you huffed, crossing your arms over your chest, “did Logan sign up for this?”

“I already told you,” Cornelius gruffed out, “he volunteered.”

“And why should I believe you? Why have you named him Weapon X if all we’re trying to do is cure him? Why did you have to erase his memories? Why have you been forcing him to fight wild animals in the forest? Are you making me attach adamantium to his skeleton because you want to help him, or because you want to manufacture a mindless killing machine?” Your voice had raised several notches in volume, and the doctor seemed to recoil at your words. Sucking in a breath to calm your erratic pulse, you spoke again, “You’re not telling me something, Cornelius.”

The doctor, stunned into silence, took several moments to gather what he wanted to say. A rebuttal was just on the tip of his tongue, but he knew it would be fruitless.

You’ve figured it out.

And he would have to kill you for it.

“Was he abducted? Kidnapped?” you asked again, voice strained.

“Congratulations,” the doctor sneered, slowly rising to his feet. “You’ve put together the puzzle pieces.”

Bile rose in your throat. “Logan was forced into this. He didn’t want any of it. You… you’re trying to make a monster but—you’re the real monster here.” Slowly, you started backing up. “You were using me. You knew that I wouldn’t help graft the adamantium to his skeleton if I knew the truth. You’re insane. You’re sick.”

With a mangled cry, the doctor lunged forward, knocking you to the ground as his palms found your throat. Pain flourished through your spine as it thudded against the sleek tiles of the floor, a strangled sound crawling from your lips. You clawed at his hands at first, desperate and losing air far too quickly.

Then, you grappled at his face, scratching at his cheeks until blood welled in tiny droplets from the red marks you drew. This only seemed to enrage him further, fingers pressing harder into your trachea. Dark spots danced about your vision and you gasped for breath, eyes misting over with unshed tears.

Fuck. You needed to do something. Quick.

Maybe… your powers—

No. No, you’d find another way. You refused to lose control of yourself ever again.

The chair was right beside you. If you could just… hook your foot around one of its legs and tip it forwards…

Your mouth fell open as your lungs begged for mercy, limbs growing weaker with each passing second. You gave it your all to jerk forward, just enough to shift you down and catch the chair with your foot and yank it forwards.

The heavy metal seat tipped forward slowly, before giving in to its own weight and crashing on top of Cornelius. The bald man howled with pain, and his grip loosened on you momentarily. You hiked your knees upwards and slammed them into his stomach, shoving him away with a yell. Your chest heaved raggedly, greedily swallowing as much air as you could take.

The doctor was quick to recover from his initial shock. You thought he’d lunge for you again, but instead, he brandished a walkie talkie and yelled, “CODE RED, GET IN HERE RIGHT NOW! CODE RED!”

Without a damned clue what ‘code red’ meant, you rushed forward and slammed the emergency lockdown button on the control panel. A haggard sigh of relief left you when thick metal slabs slowly lowered down over the doors.

Cornelius, infuriated, grabbed the back of your head and shoved you down, slamming the side of your face into the plethora of buttons. A loud groan of pain ricocheted across the laboratory, blood seeping from one of your nostrils and slipping into your mouth, running a metallic copper taste along your tongue. He did it again, and again, and again, far too quickly for you to even begin to react. Faintly, you registered a whooshing sound in front of you—one of you must’ve accidentally hit the button that released Logan from his chemical bath.

You spat blood over the buttons with a snarl, reinvigorated, shooting your hands out to stop him from bashing your face in once more. Twisting your body, you kicked at his knee as hard as you could, which made Cornelius collapse forward. You messily drove your fist into his eye socket, pushing him back, away from the control panel. The doctor fell onto the ground and you kicked at his skull with the heel of your shoe.

There was blood dripping down your chin. Your nose was throbbing. You were disoriented, vision splitting into blurry duplicates. Dizzy, you dropped to your haunches, crawling as far away as you could from Cornelius.

Noises were coming from the other side of the lab. Where Logan was.

Wincing, you were just about to turn to look before Cornelius’ hand wound around your ankle, yanking you to him with surprising strength. He punched you in the shoulder first, trying to aim for your face. You flailed your limbs, attempting to kick your feet, but he had trapped your legs between his. A struggling whimper shook your lips, breaths coming in fast, staccato beats. The second time he punched you, he hit you dead on. Your vision went dark for a good ten seconds. You could tell one of your eyelids had already swollen shut.

Desperate and panicked, you lurched upwards and bit into whatever you could. You sank your teeth in until red squirted straight into your other eye, and copper flooded your mouth once more. An ear-piercing scream rattled through the lab.

As you furiously wiped away the dark ichor from your eyes, you realized that he wasn’t screaming because of you—not really, at least.

He was screaming because there were three adamantium claws protruding from his abdomen.

And just behind him was Logan.

A terrified garble tore through your own throat. A string of nonsensical words fell from you—ranging from cries for help, prayers to whatever god would listen to you, and incoherent sobbing as pure terror ripped through you, whole and consuming.

There were still wires hanging off of the man’s starkly naked form, dragging against the ground behind him. His skin glistened with the residue from the chemical bath, droplets still falling from his damp hair and rolling over his defined muscles. With a near animalistic growl, he threw Cornelius’ lifeless corpse to the side, his adamantium claws streaking down both your arm and your side in the process. Another wail erupted from you and you curled into a fetal position, cradling your injuries and fruitlessly trying to put as much pressure as you could against the wounds. Blood seeped from you, staining the once-pristine floors with a growing pool of liquid rubies. You were light-headed, tilting your head up to look at Logan standing in front of you. Horror painted your insides with a thick, tar-like substance.

He made no move to hurt you any further, only regarding you with dark, distant eyes, like he just could just barely recognize your face. He remembered you.

You wanted to plead—beg him for mercy.

You cracked your shaking lips open, but the words lodged firmly in your throat, a sob rippling through your lungs. Hot tears streamed down your bloodied cheeks in fat dollops.

The mutant surprised you, then.

He spoke.

“I am…” he croaked out, seeming slightly miffed. It took him another couple of seconds to articulate his next words. His brain had been fried over and over again, the English language was something he had nearly completely forgotten. “I am… dead? I remember… death. Dying.”

You were shaking uncontrollably now. Whether it be because of the terror, or because of the insurmountable blood loss, you weren’t quite sure. Most likely both.

Voice warbling, you croaked out, “No, Logan. You’re not dead.”

His dark pupils darted to the pool of blood by your side, then moved down to his own hands and claws, practically soaked red. His chest heaved.

Slowly, you raised a trembling hand to point at the winding metal staircase at the back of the laboratory. “Run, Logan,” you hoarsely whispered. “They’ll be here any minute. You have to go before they catch you again. Go upstairs—there’s a rear window you can escape through.”

The man narrowed his eyes at you.

He stalked away wordlessly, leaving only droplets of Cornelius’ blood in his wake.

The tension melted away from your body instantaneously. The urge to cry laid heavy on your conscience, but you shoved down the tears and slowly pushed yourself to your feet, placing pressure on your wounds as you staggered onto your feet. With a grunt, you limped to Cornelius’ corpse, kneeling down to rip his belt and shirt off.

A low groan rumbled from your chest when you tied the belt over the deep gash Logan had inflicted on you, wrapping his shirt tightly over the leaking wound on your waist. Whether it was an accident or a purposeful move, you had no clue. Immediately, blood seeped through the fabric. You decided not to pay it any mind.

Faintly, you registered shouting from the other end of the barricaded door. You were running out of time.

Huffing a curse, you struggled to your feet and stepped over Cornelius, bee-lining for the metal staircase. Upstairs, you could see the droplets of blood Weapon X had left behind. You swallowed heavily, before following them to the open window.

“Fuck,” you coarsely spat out, glancing down to see snow blanketing the ground nearly at knee-length. Trembling already, you hopped off the windowsill and onto the fire escape’s ladder, gingerly placing each foot on the lower rung until you were near enough to jump down.

The wind whispered frost into your ears as you looked forward, into the dark forest.

They would kill you if you went back inside. It seemed like you had no other choice but to follow Logan. He was your best chance at survival.

Your sigh misted into an opaque fog as you followed the trail of blood on the snowy forest floor.

It’d been hours.

You had lost nearly all sensation in your feet, numbed by the frigid cold. You supposed that was one upside of the frost—you could no longer feel the pain of your wounds, despite the large blooming of crimson seeping through Cornelius’ shirt. The lids of your eyes were heavy, drooping closed every few seconds before struggling back open. You wrapped your arms around yourself lethargically, struggling to keep putting one foot in front of the other.

Logan was only a couple minutes in front of you. At least—you thought he was. Hell, he could’ve been five hours away by now, considering how out of it you were.

You swallowed your throat, dry and scratchy from the whipping wind of the forest.

Not even ten steps later, you found yourself tipping forward, succumbing to the exhaustion.

The snow was suddenly flush against your cheek, the world now angled vertically. Black spots danced about your sight. You only barely registered the pain of hitting the ground, a wooden stick poking uncomfortably against your leg. You couldn’t be bothered to move. You couldn’t feel anything—yet it felt like you were burning alive. Perhaps it was the blood loss. Maybe the shame of failure. Or it could’ve simply just been the fact that you’ve been wading around in the snow for hours. A small breath slipped from your lungs and your eyes fell shut.

A nap wouldn’t hurt… would it?

Just as the corners of your vision waned dark, the shadow of a figure loomed over you.

The last thing you felt right before you succumbed to the cold were a pair of warm arms winding around you.

Lights—far too many, far too bright. Your heavy eyelids narrowed as soon as they blinked open, and you gingerly turned your face to the side to avoid the glare of the harsh luminosity.

There were a couple things you registered in your early stages of rousing. You were no longer cold, bundled in several layers of woolen blankets on what you presumed to be an infirmary bed. You could feel the slight pressure of a proper bandage around your waist, which still throbbed but wasn’t nearly as painful as you remembered.

And there was a man in a lab coat beside you.

You stared at his back as he busied themself with colorful pills and bottles. Your throat was so dry, it took you several moments to muster yourself to croak out a warbling, “Hello?”

The man seemed to jump out of his shoes, turning abruptly with wide eyes behind thick, rectangular spectacles. “Oh, you’re awake! How are you feeling?” He shuffled to your side, watching you with evident concern.

You winced as you propped yourself up on one arm, slowly pulling yourself to sit up on the bed without putting too much weight on your wound. “Like I’ve been hit by a truck.”

He pursed his lips. “That’s unfortunately quite expected—you’ll be feeling that way for a little bit before you get better. You took quite the beating out there—I tried my best to patch you up but I’m afraid the lacerations you got on your abdomen and arm will scar forever. Those bruises on your face, however, will be gone in a week, two tops.” The man paused, as if wanting to ask you a question, but thought better of it, shaking his head. “I’m gonna call somebody here to come talk to you. And I’ll go get you some water and food. Is that okay?”

Still reeling over everything, you nodded slowly, watching as he strode out of the infirmary.

Not a minute later, you heard the smooth rolling of wheels against tile. A bald man on a wheelchair swiftly entered the room, greeting you with a genuine smile and a bow of his head.

“You must be Doctor L/N,” he said, stopping just by your bedside. “I’m Charles Xavier. Now, I’m sure you have many questions—so let me try to answer them. You’re currently in Xavier’s School of Gifted Youngsters. I sensed your distress through my own telepathic mutation and had some of my X-Men go pick you and Logan up.”

At the mention of Logan, your muscles tensed, and your gaze snapped upwards to meet his.

“Logan… he’s here?”

Charles tilted his head, thinking back to the burly, pacing man in his office. “Yes, quite.”

“Is he okay?” you asked softly.

A wisp of a smile graced Charles’ lips. “He’s fine. A bit disoriented, but his memories are steadily returning. You, I’m more worried about. I know you’re a mutant, Y/N.”

Something dangerous flashed behind your irises. “I’ve never purposefully used my powers on anyone, if that’s what you’re asking. What happened to Logan—was because I was foolish enough to trust bad men.”

“I’m not blaming you, Y/N. You thought you were doing the right thing. Besides, the group who tricked you have been apprehended by the X-Men. They won’t be conducting anymore experiments on mutants,” he said, not unkindly. “I wanted to give you the liberty to explain what your mutation is… and if you can control it.”

“It’s only happened once before,” you whispered, fiddling with your nails anxiously. “I can manipulate matter, I think. Rearrange atoms and molecules in space. Once I start, I can’t control it—so I don’t ever intend to use it again.”

Charles regarded you for a moment, before nodding. “That’s quite the commitment. Would you mind me asking why?”

You hesitated, your teeth worrying into your bottom lip. “The first time I found out about my powers, someone died because of me. There was a car crash and my friend tried helping me and I… I panicked—” Tears quickly blurred your vision and you hiccuped, stopping to furiously wipe them away. “Shards of glass flew everywhere and…”

You trailed off, releasing a frustrated sigh.

“The cops ruled it as an accident, but I knew it was my fault. I moved out of town, started doing research with a university in molecular biology in hopes of finding out more about myself, when I got an offer to work with this company that ‘helped’ mutants. They lied to me. They were experimenting on them—and I should’ve known better. I thought I was saving Logan’s life.”

Charles hummed in thought, before shaking his head. “It’s not your fault. It was an accident—you didn’t know how to control your powers. But we can help you with that. If you stay, that is.”

Mouth parting in surprise, you leaned forward slightly in confusion. “You… you want me to stay here? After everything I’ve done? What will Logan think?”

“He knows it’s not your fault. There’s a reason he didn’t kill you—and a reason he carried you through the snow until we found the two of you. The deal is still on the table—just think about it. You’d make a valuable asset to our team.” A genuine smile etched over his face before he asked, “Would you perhaps want to see Logan?”

“No!” you exclaimed, a little too quickly. Charles’ eyebrows rose. Arms wrapping around yourself, you gently shook your head, repeating in a quieter tone, “No, thank you.”

The man observed you rather pensively before humming, “Alright, then. I’ll let you get some rest.”

“Thank you.” Despite the tautness of your tone, Charles knew you were wholly grateful. He bowed his head, and wheeled out of the infirmary room, leaving you with your thoughts.

To none of his surprise, leaning against the wall right next to the door, was Logan.

There was a cheap cigar wedged between his lips, hands clutched over the dog tags around his neck. He cocked his head to Charles as a greeting, gruffing out, “Are they alright?”

It was rather amusing to see such a brooding, stoic man lose his wits over a person he barely knew. Logan cared about you, and that made Charles all the more curious.

“I think Y/N’s going to be just fine.”

Logan huffed in something akin to relief, blowing out a puff of opaque smoke. After a long stretch of silence, Logan queried in a strained voice, “Can I see them?”

“It’s best if you give Y/N some time. They’re still a bit rattled over everything,” said the professor, patiently. “Have you gotten your memories back?”

“I think so. I remember most of my life before getting kidnapped. I taught self defense here, right?” Logan muttered, though it was clear he wasn’t entirely sure of himself. When Charles grinned and nodded, Logan spoke again, hesitant. “I remember Y/N. Their face, watching me through the glass. Talking about curing me—helping me. I remember the doctor there trying to kill them once they found out the truth.”

A low growl rumbled within the grizzled man’s chest, and he slumped further against the wall. “What are you going to do with Y/N now?”

“Well, that’s up to them. They are a mutant after all—I offered them a place here. Whether they stay or not is not for me to say.”

This seemed to pique Logan’s interest. “Y/N’s a mutant?”

“Yes,” Charles stated matter-of-factly. “Though, they don’t use their powers because it’s far too dangerous. Which is why I proposed that they stay so we can help. Now, if you excuse me, Logan, I’ve got to grade some papers. Have a good night.”

“Yeah,” replied Logan, distant. He saluted Charles with two fingers as he wheeled away. “G’night.”

The rest of the X-Men warmed up to you rather quickly. Hank would joke around with you while he did your daily check-up, and Jean, Ororo and Anna introduced themselves with sweet smiles and baked goods that they made just for you. They’d stay with you in the infirmary until late at night, playing boisterous rounds of Uno and exchanging stories of their own childhood mishaps with their mutation. Kurt Wagner was a delight to speak to—you quite enjoyed your conversations with the lively teleporter. Scott Summers was a handsome fellow, who had acquired a broken arm from a training accident, which gave him a good excuse to hang around you. Charles often visited you as well, each time asking once again if you were planning on making your residence here permanent. He even offered you a job to teach the kids here some science—which you kindly declined.

The friendly nature of the mansion and the people residing there really made you want to stay.

But you knew you shouldn’t.

Especially not when Logan was so clearly avoiding you—it was a tell-tale sign that you were definitely overstaying your welcome.

You’d only seen him a small handful of times since you arrived. Lingering in the hallways, passing by the door, and once in Charles’ office when you dropped by to ask him a question. He had stalked away with nary a sound, not even bothering to spare you a glance.

So it was quite the surprise when he stepped into the infirmary while you were packing a small duffel bag with travel necessities nearly two weeks later, practically bristling at the thought of you leaving. Leaving when he hadn’t even said a single word to you. His jaw clenched.

“L… Logan?” you asked, nearly dropping the shirt you were holding out of shock. “What, uh, what are you doing here?”

He stared at you for a long while, unsure of what to say. The man was on his way to a bar for a beer or two before he caught sight of you practically flying across the room in a rush to pack. He was not prepared for this conversation at all. A part of him wished you could just read his thoughts like Charles could, because his mind was running a mile a minute. There were just too many things he should’ve said, too many things he waited too long to say. And none of it seemed to want to come out.

So he opted to heave out a grand sigh, leaning against the wall and crossing his arms, not once breaking eye contact with you. You had awkwardly resigned to folding the last few pieces of clothing, stuffing them into the bag.

The action prompted Logan to husk out, “You’re leaving.”

It was more of a statement than a question. Your muscles tensed at his voice. He seemed angry—frustrated—and you weren’t entirely sure if it was directed towards you, or himself.

“I have no place here,” you whispered, words nearly lost to the deafening silence.

Logan’s brows furrowed. “This is a school—a home for mutants. You belong here.”

Fixing him with a curious expression, you zipped up your bag, shaking your head. “It’s not fair to you, Logan. I can’t just keep pretending that me being around doesn’t make you uncomfortable.”

“So you’re leaving because of me.” Logan pushed off the wall, stalking towards you until he stood just in front of you. This close, you could smell the faint cigar smoke on him, accompanied with a fresh pine-like aroma. He smelled like the forest, like sitting in front of a fire place with a mug of coffee cradled in your palms. A lump formed in your throat, grip tightening on the strap of the bag.

“I’m leaving for you,” you corrected. “And I’m sorry. I’m sorry I did all those awful things to you. I know it doesn’t absolve me of anything but—I really did think I was helping you. Oh… and thank you. For coming back and saving me.”

The hardness to Logan’s features seemed to soften just a bit. He watched you keenly, studying the genuine tenderness to your eyes, the way your lips screwed to the side in a fruitless effort to stave away the tears.

“Hey,” he said, stepping even closer. “I forgive you, bub. I forgive you, alright? Stop beating yourself up. Charles told me you thought you were helping me—and I believe it. It wasn’t your fault. Besides, the man truly responsible is dead, thanks to you. You helped me escape, remember?”

Your eyes flickered from the ground to meet his. “Of course I remember.”

A low rumble resonated from Logan’s chest. “If anything, I should be the one apologizing for damn near killing you. I found you passed out in the snow and I—I was terrified. I carried you, worried to death the entire time, thinkin’ you were going to die on me. But Charles found us—and you lived. We both lived. I want you to stay. Hell, if you want to leave, then go ahead. The door’s wide open. But don’t let it be because of me.”

He watched as your shoulders trembled ever so slightly, then sagged as you loosened your hold on the duffel bag. Relief seeped through his bones. For a moment, he was scared you were really going to leave.

Without another word, Logan nodded, stepping back. He turned to walk out of the infirmary, itching for nice, cold beer. Or two. Probably five. Oh, who was he kidding. He could blaze through twenty bottles and barely feel buzzed.

“Logan,” you called out.

He stopped by the doorway without turning.

“Thank you,” you croaked, wiping away a stray tear. A happy one. Maybe you could even ask if the job Charles had offered you was still on the table.

A minuscule smile played by the corner of his lips. He ducked his head, and strode away.

ONE MONTH LATER.

The snow was thicker than ever before. Nearly everybody was outside, either making rotund little snowmen with carrots for noses or playing a game of dodgeball. You caught sight of Kurt teleporting just above Rogue to dump a large armful of snow atop her head. You huffed out a laugh from behind the window when she started spewing out a long string of curses, cheeks tinted red from the cold.

Movement from your peripheral vision made you turn your head to look out the other window. You were met with the lovely sight of Logan hauling lumber nearly double his size from just over the hill, a layer of snowflakes icing the top of his dark tresses. You shook your head, wondering why he hadn’t asked anyone for help.

Ever the lone wolf, he was.

Commotion from the other window made you turn once more, watching with a snort when the kids began pelting Logan with dozens of snowballs, laughing with unbridled glee. The chuckles died away when the burly man dropped all the wood he was carrying, rolling up his sleeves with a wolfish grin. They screamed, scurrying away whilst hiccuping with laughter.

“Quite chilly outside,” Charles’ voice broke out from beside you. “Come have a hot chocolate with me.”

“If this is your way of bribing me to grade your classes’ papers, I’ll have you know I’m not easily swayed,” you teased, though fell into step beside him as he led you into his office. “I’ve got my own class to attend to.”

Despite only knowing Charles for around a month now, the two of you have grown very fond of each other. He was like a big brother to you—just as the rest of the X-Men had gradually become your family.

The professor scoffed. “That was one time! I just wanted your expertise, was all.” He gestured to the array of mugs on his desk, then to the thermos right beside them. “Please, help yourself. Paper grading wasn’t really what I wanted to discuss with you. I have another proposition to make you.”

You arched a brow while pouring the both of you a generous serving of thick, creamy hot chocolate. “Always with the propositions, Charles,” you said, sipping on your drink with a hum. “What is it?”

“I want you to join our missions.”

The lighthearted nature of your conversation visibly seemed to sour. “What?” you asked, placing your mug down. “Charles, I thought we made this clear—”

“You don’t use your powers, yes. I’m well aware. Let me rephrase. I want to help you… er, reacquaint yourself with your abilities. Just to try it out. And perhaps if all goes smoothly, you’d make a remarkably valuable member on our team. I promise, if we try it out and things go south, I’ll let it go. Never speak a word of it to anybody.” There was an earnest tone to his voice, hopeful and contagiously optimistic.

Your finger traced the rim of the mug, pursing your lips in thought. “Just to try it out?”

He nodded. “Just to try it out. I’m curious for you, Y/N. Haven’t you ever wanted to be able to control your powers?”

“More than anything in the entire world,” you murmured quietly, voice cracking.

It took me a while to control my powers, too, Charles said, but his lips weren’t moving. It took you a moment to realize that he was speaking to you telepathically. The key is patience. And I do believe with enough time, you can gain control of yours as well. Imagine how many children who are struggling with their own mutations you’d be able to help if you had a grasp of your powers.

“You’re one hell of a motivational speaker,” you snarked after a moment to mull over his offer, despite the smile fiddling at the corner of your lips. “Alright, Charles. You convinced me. When do we start?”

The large, antique grandfather clock in your office merrily trilled thrice just as the hands turned to three in the afternoon. You glanced away from the homework papers you were grading, before filing them away for you to finish off later. You were in need of a long overdue break. Rising from your chair, you groaned softly as your bones popped with the stretch, rolling your shoulders to ease the mild tension.

Training all night with Charles yesterday certainly took both a physical and mental toll on you.

You needed to get out of your office for a bit—take a walk to clear your head. As you donned your coat and a dark yellow beanie to tuck just over the top of your ears because they grew particularly cold in the harsh winters, you strode out the doors.

Before you could make your way to the snowy outdoors, you passed by one of the training rooms, where you heard a familiar gruff voice.

Logan was teaching a group of about a dozen kids—self-defense class, if you could recall. He was moving his arms about animatedly, demonstrating with a dummy that seemed to be a brush away from falling apart. The kids were watching with rapt fascination, gasping in unison when Logan speared the poor thing straight through the abdomen.

A small grin splayed over your features as you leaned against the doorway.

A young boy raised his hand, asking, “When are we gonna be able to practice?”

Logan sheathed his claws and crossed his arms. “I’ll let you practice with your own dummies next week. But for now you just watch and learn—Y/N? What’re you doin’ here?”

Blinking at suddenly being shoved into the spotlight, you sheepishly stepped forward and waved to the kids. “Just wanted to see what all the fuss is about with Mr. Howlett’s famous self-defense class. Heard it’s the students’ second favorite class.”

“Oh, yeah?” Logan chuckled, arching an eyebrow to the rest of the class. “And what would be their favorite, then?”

You grinned. “Mine, of course.” The kids groaned in protest, though laughing at your blatant sarcasm. You waved them away with a roll of your eyes. “Oh, hush. You guys love science.”

Snorting, Logan propped his fists onto his hips and directed a roguish grin towards you. “It’s not a competition—even though they obviously like me better.” He turned back to the dummy with a nod. “Anyways, where was I—er, yes, Rogue?”

The student’s arm was stuck up in the air, an excited grin painted over her lips. “Why don’t you and Professor L/N try dueling each other? I’m sure it’d teach us a lot more than that dummy,” Rogue drawled in her thick Southern accent. The rest of the students murmured their agreement, bobbing their heads to the idea. Besides, they were all curious about your infamous mutation—they’d never seen you in action before.

Immediately, your stomach dropped and you were quick to shake your head just enough for Logan to see. His features seemed to soften with understanding.

“That’s enough, settle down,” Logan gruffed. “Professor L/N came here to watch, it would be unfair to spring an entire demonstration on them without any warning. The dummy’ll do just fine. Look, it’s in tip-top shape!” His burly fist wrapped around the dummy’s throat.

And the head popped right off.

Logan blinked, stunned. The class burst into laughter. You joined them, hiding a smile behind your palm. Logan watched you keenly, before a crooked smile broke through his rough features, chuckling lowly under his breath.

“I’m sorry about them,” he said, making his way to you once he had dismissed all his pupils (though not before assigning them a butt-load of homework that made all of them groan exasperatedly). “I know you weren’t expecting that.”

Waving his words away, you were quick to shake your head. “No, no, it’s alright. I’m just… not entirely comfortable with using my powers yet. Charles and I are still working through it—I’m not really at the stage of combating an experienced mutant as yourself. Anyways, I don’t want to keep you. I’m sure you’ve got a ton of school-related errands to run.”

You crossed your arms with a hesitant quirk of your lips to assure him that you were okay, watching him keenly as he tried to mirror your expression. It came out more as an awkward stretch of his mouth, so he dropped it soon after.

Logan sucked on the rooftop of his mouth, before stoutly nodding, and turned around to walk away. You’d mentioned he probably had school-related errands to run. Hah. As if Logan ever worked outside of the classes he taught. All he had in mind was to head over to a bar and drink as many beers as the barkeeper would allow him.

By the time he reached the doorway, Logan abruptly stopped in his tracks. He could feel your eyes watching him go, practically searing the skin on the back of his neck.

“God damn it,” he whispered quietly beneath his breath. He couldn’t just leave you alone. Not when his class thrust you into the spotlight like that. Definitely not because he felt an irrepressible urge to spend more time with you. And especially not because he thought that little grin of yours was so darned cute. Of course not.

He turned back to you with a set expression, jaw clenched tight. If you didn’t know any better, he appeared to be angry. Or constipated. One of the two.

Either way, you were surprised to hear him addressing you by the doorway, in a brusque tone.

“The school day’s over. I’m heading out to grab a drink. You wanna come with?”

It took you a moment to respond, a little too frazzled to formulate a coherent thought.

“Yeah,” you finally answered, slightly breathless. Logan pointedly looked away when you beamed at him. “Yeah, I’d love to.”

His thigh was pressed up against yours. You could feel the heat radiating off of him through his jeans. His sleeves were rolled up to his elbows, which leaned against the bar’s countertop, palms cradled around his tenth (or was it his eleventh?) frosty mug of beer.

You were slowly nursing your fifth drink, snorting into the rim when Logan made an off-hand comment about how stupid Scott looked on one of their most recent missions.

“I take it you don’t like him?”

“Who?” Logan asked, turning his head so he could look at you. Beneath the dim amber-glow of the bar’s lighting, your skin appeared flushed, eyes just a tad brighter. You were too damned close to him.

Nose wrinkling, you nudged his shoulder with yours. “Scott, dummy.”

His eyebrow rose. “Why, do you want me to like him? Do you like him?”

The questions made you splutter beer all over the counter as you choke-laughed, wiping your lips with the back of your hand. “You’re not answering my question, Lo.” You began giggling again, before downing the rest of your mug, swaying slightly on the leather stool. Logan had half a mind to clamp his palm over your thigh to keep you from tipping over.

“I like Scott, yeah. He’s nice. I know he has a thing for Jean though—I’ve been trying to convince him to ask her out but Scott keeps saying it isn’t the right time. Jean likes him all the same, too. They’re just really stupid.” A fond smile grew on your lips and you began laughing once more.

Logan watched you in amusement, just before ordering another beer for himself. You were a giggly drunk, Logan realized, as you buried your face into your hands as uncontrollable laughter shook through you.

“Alright, that’s enough drinks for you. What’s got you crackin’ up, bub?” Logan sighed in part-exasperation and part-mirth when you leaned back so far your stool began to capsize. He was quick to shoot his arm out and yank you back forward. This only made you laugh harder, for reasons unbeknownst to him.

“I just—” You had to pause to heave a breath through your cackling. “Your hair just looks so funny—why does it stand up like that?”

God, you were so drunk. Your hand reached out to pat down the tufts of hair sticking upwards, but missed the mark and instead brushed over his jaw, slightly prickly with day-old stubble.

Logan watched you carefully as your laughter died away, a strange look shadowing your once gleeful one. His eyes flickered down to your lips, which were parted ever so slightly in thought. “You look much younger than you used to—back in that tank.”

Gently, he captured your wrist and stroked his thumb over your palm once, before setting it back down by your side. “Let’s go home. You’re drunk.”

“Yes, sir. ” You mock-saluted as he helped you off the stool and offered his arm when you nearly toppled over your own feet.

You swayed to and fro when walking back to the mansion, hiccupping between every giggle as you told Logan about this one time Kurt teleported into the kitchen and scared you so badly you hit him with a frying pan. Logan let himself laugh at that one.

By the time the two of you reached your room, a good night was right on the tip of his tongue before it was yanked away from him when you grabbed him by the shirt collar and tugged him towards you in a drunken fashion, emboldened by the alcohol coursing through your system. A startled noise fell from his lungs, and the corner of your eyes wrinkled as you smiled. You swiftly planted a soft kiss to his cheek, nose slotted right against his cheekbone. He was frozen to the spot, unsure of how to react.

“You’re a sweetheart. Good night, Lo,” you murmured into his skin with a lopsided smile.

You were drunk. So very drunk.

Logan had to remind himself of this when you pulled away. You wouldn’t have done that if you were sober.

The door groaned as you pushed it open, moonlight spilling over your features. You promptly slammed the door in his face, and he heard you giggling behind it just a second after.

He wasn’t able to snap out of his reverie until an entire minute later.

“G’night, bub,” he mumbled, knowing full and well that you were probably passed out on top of your bed by now. No doubt you’d have a raging hangover tomorrow. He shook his head, before heading off to his own room, a warm sensation clawing at his chest.

The familiar voice of a certain professor rang out across the kitchen, and you groaned at the sudden noise. The hangover headache pulsating through your skull wasn’t nearly as bad as it was when you had initially woken up, but it was still there. And Charles most certainly wasn’t helping.

“Morning,” he exclaimed with a knowing smile, eyeing you with a look you misliked. You grumbled under your breath, before shoveling a spoonful of scrambled eggs into your mouth so you didn’t have to respond to him. Charles didn’t seem to mind, continuing his amiable chatter. “I noticed you weren’t in last night.”

Humming in confirmation, you lifted your mug to guzzle down more apple juice.

“Funny coincidence,” Charles quipped, wheeling up right beside you. Without even looking at him, you just knew that his eyebrows were raised suggestively. “Logan was also nowhere in the mansion yesterday.”

You scowled, then set the mug down. “We just had a couple drinks together.”

“Mmh, right.” Charles narrowed his eyes, clearly in disbelief. “Well, nice to see that the two of you have… warmed up to each other. I’ve got to head back now but don’t forget about our session at three—just because you’re hungover doesn’t mean you can skip out on me.”

A discontent noise erupted from your lungs and you stuck your tongue out at his back when he turned away.

“I saw that,” said Charles, amusement lacing his tone. “Well, I didn’t actually see it. I know you did it, though.”

And with that, he left.

You groaned, before lowering your head to rest against the cool kitchen countertop.

A moment later, a voice disrupted the rare-found quiet. Logan.

“You alright, bub?”

When you lifted your face up, you blinked away the colorful blurs spotting your vision, Logan coming into view. He was wearing a simple white tank top tucked into a pair of faded jeans, hands shoved into his pockets. You eyed his biceps warily, which glistened with a thin sheen of sweat. You swallowed down the nervous lump in your throat.

“I’m good. What’re you up to?”

“Couldn’t sleep,” Logan replied sheepishly. “Was in the training room all night.”

He leaned against the doorway, a mild smile itching at his lips upon observing your disheveled state. Your hair was mussed, wearing a simple wrinkly white shirt and a pair of grey shorts. The expression on your face told him that you were still working off the hangover.

“Wanna talk about it?” you asked, patting the seat beside you.

Logan pursed his lips, before moving towards you. “Yeah,” he said, swinging his leg over the chair. “Yeah, that’d be nice.”

The cold of the porcelain sent a shiver up your spine as you slumped against the toilet seat, grumbling under your breath. Logan watched you keenly as he dampened a towel, bunching it up in his hand, kneeling down in front of you.

Your first mission as an X-Man was nothing short of disastrous.

You’d warned Charles—told him you weren’t ready to use your powers in an uncontrolled setting—but he’d assured you that you’d be fine. Besides, the rest of your teammates were there for you.

Except the Brotherhood had taken down everybody else and you were the last person standing—and you lost control of your powers. Again.

It wasn’t until Logan stumbled towards you, pushing through the tornado of glass shards whirling around your hyperventilating form, barely even noticing the cuts appearing over his skin. His healing factor was quick to weave together the broken skin—all that mattered was getting to you. Your explosive powers were enough to severely alarm the Brotherhood, and they thankfully retreated soon after your outburst, though he doubted they’d stay away for too long.

Logan had grabbed you, pulling you close until your face was flush against his chest, cradling you atop the cold, hardened dirt, mumbling sweet nothings that you couldn’t really make out into your hair. When the air stilled, you pulled your face away, tear-stricken and bloodied.

The incident was far too similar to the first time you used your powers—when your best friend’s life was taken as a consequence.

A single, searing tear meandered down your face at the memory, and you bit down on your lip to quell the sob rising in your throat.

“Hey, bub.” Logan took your chin between his fingers, grounding you back to reality. It was just him and you—in a small bathroom. He was close, so close that you could see the buzzing lights reflected in the burnt umber of his irises, or how he had a small, faded birthmark just beside his left eye. He tilted your head up so you’d meet his concerned gaze. “It’s okay. You did good. You drove ‘em away. We would’ve all been in hot shit if it weren’t for you. Storm was knocked unconscious, Kitty and Rogue had their powers stripped away, Scott was no match against Quicksilver, and the rest of us were this close to being ripped apart. You did good.”

Your stomach lurched uneasily. “Feels more like I fucked everything up. I told Charles I wasn’t ready.”

Instead of a reply, Logan merely sighed, shaking his head. Softly he swiped the damp towel across the bloody gashes on your face, his fingers on your chin moving to cup your other cheek. His palm was cold against the flushed heat of your face.

“I hate seeing you like this,” he whispered, the usual gruff tone of his voice nowhere to be found. “Wish you had the healing factor instead of me.”

“Nah,” you replied softly, wincing as you leaned forward, closer to him. The large slash over your abdomen from a broken metal pipe Magneto sent hurtling your way burned with every shift of your body. “You’d be dead a thousand times over if it weren’t for your healing factor. And I’m really glad you’re not dead.”

The towel on your cheekbone paused for a second. Logan scrutinized you for a moment, before returning to the task at hand. “Yeah, I guess I’m glad, too.”

A comfortable silence thickened between the two of you, only interrupted by your quiet groans of pain, which were always followed up by Logan’s sheepish apology.

“I still haven’t graded the kids’ homework papers—they’re expecting it back on Monday,” you gritted out, hand shooting forward to grip Logan’s shoulder, nails digging into his collarbone when he moved down to clean up the shallow wound across your torso.

He quirked an eyebrow towards you in amusement. “You’re crazy, you know that? Almost died today and all you’re thinkin’ about is grading papers. Pfft.”

“That’s not all I’m thinking about,” you weakly protested, smacking his hand away when he playfully pinched your thigh.

After wiping away all the crusted blood and dirt on your brand new X-Men suit, he was satisfied to see that your gash wasn’t deep enough to need stitches. He hauled himself onto the edge of the bathtub so he was sitting right across from you. “Yeah? What else are you thinking about?”

“You.” The single word came out as nothing but a low mutter.

“I don’t know whether to be flattered or worried,” he replied with a roguish grin, pupils darting between your eyes and your raw-bitten lips.

You huffed out a laugh. “Maybe both.” His forehead leaned against yours as you breathed him in, relishing in his calming presence. “I really like you, Lo.”

Those five words were what spurred him to push forward, slanting his lips onto yours, stealing your breath away. You made a small noise of surprise, before practically melting into him, looping your sore arms over his neck and tugging him all the closer. He kissed you slowly, careful about where to place his hands, because your body was littered with fresh scars. He settled on just above your waist, smoothing his thumbs out over the back of your ribs, as if to constantly reassure himself that you were here. You were okay.

His nose bumped into yours, and it hurt to smile—oh, it practically burned with each kiss—but you smiled into him anyway. Because for Logan, it was worth the pain.

“Ow,” you lightly complained when he accidentally knocked his knee against your busted one. “Watch it, old man.”

A growl caught in his throat. “You know, I was gonna say I really liked you, too, but I don’t think that applies anymore.”

You burst into a fit of laughter, clutching at your stomach a second later, moaning out with pain. “Don’t make me laugh! You ass!”

He could only smile at that, roping you towards him once more with his fingers anchored over your jaw. This time, the kiss was hot and heavy, more confident. Your hands ran through his hair, gently tugging at his roots, which made pleasant shivers spider down his spine. It was needy with want, his kisses wandering from your lips to the apples of your cheeks, to your trembling throat.

The hand on your back was only starting to traverse downwards when the door flung open, revealing a smug Rogue and an awfully mortified Kurt just behind her.

“I knew it! I knew y’all were a thing!” Rogue called out, clapping her hands excitedly. “Scott totally owes me twenny bucks!”

She scuttled away gleefully, leaving the blue elf staring at the two of you with wide, amber eyes, completely still.

“You can close the door, Kurt,” you hesitantly told him, before Logan could snarl out something unsavory. You were uncomfortably perched halfway between the toilet seat and Logan’s lap, with his hand flush over your ass.

“Er… right… I’ll just use the bathroom upstairs,” he breathily stumbled, before teleporting away in a hazy cloud of sulphuric fumes.

“Damn elf didn’t close the door. Of fuckin’ course.” Logan groaned, pulling himself away from you with a scowl. “You alright, darlin’?”

An embarrassed grin replaced the initial shock of being found. “Yeah, I think so. You?”

“Worst night of my life. The entire school’s gonna know by tomorrow,” Wolverine grumbled, before fondly glancing towards you. “Wouldn’t have it any other way, though.”

You hobbled up with his support, pressing a sweet, chaste kiss to his cheek. “You think the entire team bet money on us?”

“Oh, yeah,” Logan chortled as he helped you out of the communal bathroom, heading upstairs to your bedroom. “Charlie bet a hundred bucks on us. I heard him talking to Storm about it.”

You side-eyed him with amusement. “So did he win?”

“Nope,” Logan said, popping the ‘p’, looking far too smug to be ripping away a hundred dollars from his old friend. “Thought neither of us would have the balls to confess until next month.”

“You’re sick,” you said, wrinkling your nose. “Did you kiss me just to spite him?”

“I kissed you because I wanted to,” countered Logan, shoving the door to your room open with his shoulder. “Professor losing a hundred bucks was just the cherry on top, you know?”

You sank onto your bed, dragging Logan with you, barely giving him enough time to slam the door shut. “Yeah,” you mumbled, pulling him into yet another kiss. “You’re awful, Lo.”

“Love you, too.”

Placing your hand on his chest, you pulled away hesitantly, unsure if you heard him right. “Yeah?”

Logan smiled, all warm and genuine. “Yeah.”

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yxami · 1 year

Note

Hi can i request a yandere gangster one shot (maybe more than one if u like it)?

Also idk why but i kinda imagine timothy olyphant whenever i read a gangster or mafia sorta fic so can you maybe use him as the face claim?

I’m gonna assume you meant Timothy Olyphant in his prime as face claim so I did that! Also I don’t know anything about him so I hope the generic gangster worked well enough.

Description: yandere gangster x reader, dark themes, pretty short, possessiveness, mentioned killing and stalking, flirty gangster, nervous reader. Not that long but if anyone wants to see more him I’ll continue it.

Bright ash from a cigarette was flicked onto the ground and extinguished from a large shoe. The chatter of intimidating husky voices were shared until it only became one. Despite all of this warnings, you continued on into this risky alley way.

Your eyes met another pair with the only remaining man there. He was a tall man. His dark hair blended in with the dark atmosphere, he had some growing stubble on his lower face and mustache area. He was attractive but you could tell he was a dangerous guy from what you’ve seen of him the past few weeks.

“Hmm? What brought you here again? Do you need someone else to disappear?” He flashed a familiar smile that made your heart pump more blood then it had to.

“Uhm.. no i just wanted to see you” You grabbed onto the side of your pants, trying to calm your racing heart. He could tell you were nervous, he just wondered why. Was it his looks? Or was it the creepy dark aura of the alleyway?

“Really? That’s adorable, what did you want to see me about?” He got close to you instead of leaning on the wall. You could smell a smoky aroma to him but it was addicting rather than suffocating.

“I asked you to uhm.. kill my coworker but there was two including her that were killed. Did you accidentally kill two? I only paid for one and I can only afford that..” You wiped your sweaty palms against your pants. You were nervous that he was going to demand that you pay for two.

You only wanted one dead! That was because she was rude to everybody in the workplace. She had relentlessly bullied you and gotten away with it! The other co worker that was killed would always poke fun at you too but it wasn’t as severe as her so you didn’t care.

“Oh you meant that other girl? Hmm, let’s just say it’s a two for one deal. Don’t worry about it” He smirked but there was definitely something dangerous about it.

“But.. why? I didn’t ask for her!” You accidentally raised your voice. You didn’t mean to, you were just so confused.

“Listen baby, if I tell you not to worry about it, don’t” He got closer to you and now you were against the other side of the alley way. You were flustered under his piercing stare. His brown eyes looked black under the shadows of this place.

“Okay! Just don’t kill anymore? That’s all I needed” You were nervous to emphasize on not killing anymore but you only wanted her dead! You were scared attention was going to be drawn to you.

He laughed finding it humorous that you asked him to not kill anymore. He was going to kill anyone he wanted to if it meant you were safe and you were gonna be his and only his.

“You’re adorable baby, I wish I could keep you as my little pet forever” He put his hands across your head and had you trapped against the wall.

“What I would do for you to be mine. I wish you knew how crazy I was for you.”

His sudden intense confessions made you more tense, you felt like a mouse by the way he trapped you against the wall. What were you supposed to do? Why did this guy even want you? You had only known him for a few weeks!

If only you knew this man had been stalking you and watching your every move. Waiting until you came to him for the relentless bullying you got. He knew that he was known to get rid of people. He was just waiting for you to find out about him.

Originally, he was going to kill those fucking pests that bothered you everyday. But he wanted to be your knight in shining armor, the man who saved you from your enemies, the gangster did your bidding for the right price. One you would keep going back to when you needed more! Sure it wasn’t the most ideal way to meet you but it still worked! You came back and back!

“I don’t understand.. you love me? Why?” You felt the wet wall dampen your clothes, the coldness made you shiver. It’s not like you weren’t already squirming under his close proximity.

“Why wouldn’t I?? The first time I saw you I wanted to keep you forever, to have you to myself, to protect you from those fucking bastards.” His low husky voice made goosebumps pop up.

“I didn’t know.. you were into me like that! It’s not a bad thing! I mean I think you’re very attractive! It’s just.. I don’t want you killing anymore people” You rambled as much as he let you.

“I won’t kill anymore if I don’t need to, I just need you in my arms..” He mumbled caressing your face.

“I’m sure you don’t need to. I’m open to a date or two! I just want to get to know you more before anything” You blushed under his hand touching your cheek. You wondered if he could feel the heat radiating off of you despite the coldness of this place.

“Hmm, you’re right. I should’ve asked you on a date before confessing.. Alright! Tomorrow I’ll pick you up for that date and then you can get to know all about me” He lowered his hand and backed up. Giving you space to leave even though he wanted you near him.

“Okay here’s my address.. and my number when you can pick me up”

“I don’t need any of that, I already know it” He smiled at you as if it was common knowledge to know your address.

“I- uhm alright? See you tomorrow then!” You were confused on how he knew your address? He must really stalk you all the time if he knew! You were out of the alley way and started walking to your house. Lost in thought about the whole situation..

Did you just make the biggest mistake of your life?

#yandere #yandere x you #yandere x y/n #gn reader #male yandere #pls request #yandere imagines #yandere scenarios #stalking #gangster x reader #gang member x reader #killing mention #manipulation #eamonmyoc

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clean-bands-dirty-stories · 3 months

Text

Awkward ~ B.B.

A/n: No idea if this is out of character or not but I had fun keeping it short and sweet for once so i hope yall enjoy!

Request: “Bellamy Blake x Male reader, him and Bellamy already having a relationship but breaking up a little bit before they were sent down and reader being cold and not his happy self” by anon

Word Count: 1800+

MASTERLIST

Bellamy counted himself lucky to have met his boyfriend.

Even if they were going to end like this.

It was one of those familiar loves. The kind that take forever to build, and then last forever. The kind that took parts of you and changed them, rearranged them, and left you irrevocably changed. The kind that made a home in the center of your soul, carving the shape of a person that could never be filled by any other person ever again. The kind of love that redefined home. It was a slow burn, but strong. Inevitable.

And then it was over.

Bellamy knew that he would have stayed on this ship with his boyfriend if Y/n had asked... and he couldn't chance that. It was better anyway to leave Y/n hating him so that when he disappeared, his now ex boyfriend wouldn't worry about him or wonder if he was okay. This way, it was better for everyone. And Bellamy kept that resolve as he laid out his plan to get onto the ship with Octavia and all the way down to Earth where they could all be free and happy. If he had to leave his boyfriend, he would. For his sister. She was what mattered.

And then Y/n showed up on the ship anyway.

Bellamy almost didn't recognize him. It hadn't been long, no matter how it had felt like ages, but Y/n was completely different. His style choice had changed, his demeanor, the way he impacted the world around him - all of it was wrong. Once Y/n had been a blazing fire, a bright light. He had been a breath of fresh air, coloring the world with pink and yellow and giving Bellamy a sliver of positivity and comfort in a world Bellamy had for so long thought was too cold and broken to give up anything good anymore. Now...

Y/n was distant, quiet. He faded into the background. He didn't make eye contact with anyone, and if he did then they were quick to scatter and give him room. He was intimidating. Scary. The only reason Bellamy even clocked him was because Y/n had stepped up to side with Clarke as she and Bellamy began to butt heads for who would be in charge. It would have been surprising, if not for their history. And the fact that Bellamy had been sleeping around every moment he had since he'd gotten to Earth,

The problem was that Bellamy had made a promise to himself. Earth wouldn't just be an escape from prison - it would be an escape from life on that god forsaken ship. He came here to be free - really free. Liberated. He wanted people to see all the things this place had to offer and how amazing it was to not have any of the adults to drag them down. He needed to spend every minute convincing people they wanted and even needed to be on Earth by themselves. Completely separate from society.

He didn't want to sleep with these women. He didn't want to lead. He wanted to be alone with his sister and be free and happy, and more than anything he wanted to fall into Y/n's arms and break into tears and tell him everything and get that smile back on his face. Where it belonged.

But he stuck to plan anyway.

Predictably, that decision made everything so much worse.

Bellamy knew he'd maybe gone a little too far, being too protective of Octavia, when she shoved him one day and told him to fuck himself. The next time Bellamy saw her, she was with Y/n and they were talking in gentle, low voices. Y/n had always been better with Octavia than Bellamy was, and now it showed. Even as this darker, more reserved version of himself he still managed to make Octavia smile. She seemed to make him ease in return, but that smile that was so often on his face before coming to Earth still didn't make an appearance.

As things started to go wrong, it was becoming very quickly more and more obvious that Clarke was the better leader - especially with Y/n as her second. It had happened mostly on accident; there just wasn't anyone Clarke trusted with responsibility... or really trusted at all. Y/n proved himself again and again, encouraging Clarke to trust him more and more - so as she rose, so did he. There was something about Y/n trusting her that seemed to convince everyone to at least listen. Y/n joked that he was big and scary and had scary dog privileges and the fact that she'd 'tamed him' was why everyone was keen on listening to her. Clarke always rolled her eyes at that.

Bellamy didn't find it funny, but Octavia did, and she took every chance to tease Clarke and Y/n for being a match made in Heaven. A perfect duo. The leader of the masses and her loyal guard dog. Y/n and Clarke found it amusing enough so they never discouraged her.

It bothered Bellamy even more.

Tensions began to rapidly build. Y/n and Bellamy were more often chest to chest, nose to nose, staring each other down with malice in their eyes, and only Clarke and Octavia were able to rip the two boys apart. The sheer amount of energy between them delivered some kind of message, and the impression began to grow that there was something between them. Octavia knew, but she wasn't about to out her brother, who had never wanted to come out, or throw Y/n under the bus for getting his heart absolutely shattered by Bellamy.

Unfortunately there was only so much avoiding each other that could happen when a poisonous fog rolled through the forest, horribly killing anyone who got caught in it. In the chaos to scramble, Y/n got shoved and fell. If not for Bellamy stopping and pulling him into a close by little cove, Y/n would have died. It maybe should have prevented the hostility from being as high as it was, as quickly as it was... alas...

Y/n and Bellamy were arguing after about ten minutes. Both of them had forgotten what had started it in another ten minutes, because it wasn't soon before the real issue came out. With no one there to stop them, their back and forth devolved until the source of it all came to the surface.

"I'm sure you'll be overjoyed when this whole thing ends and you can go back to your girlfriend," Bellamy shot at his ex.

Y/n sneered, lips pulling back over bared teeth. This is always what drove Octavia and Clarke to pull them apart: the two boys looks like they were about to kill each other. They'd never fought before, let alone like this, but even now... they wouldn't hurt each other, and that's what even Octavia was missing. At least with their fists. Y/n didn't pull back now as he spat back, "Are you talking about Clarke? God, how old are you? She's not my girlfriend."

"You look pretty friendly." Bellamy rolled his eyes, crossing his arms over his chest.

"Because we're friends!" Y/n's voice bounced off the walls as it rose into a scream, the increased volume only setting Bellamy more on edge.

"Then why are you constantly following her around like a lost puppy? Did you lose your self respect after we broke up?"

Y/n finally snapped. "I LOST EVERYTHING WHEN WE BROKE UP!" There was a ringing silence after those words. They seemed to hang in the air, and Bellamy's eyes widened as he realized there were tears streaming down Y/n's face. He couldn't move, couldn't even breathe, not knowing he had made Y/n cry. Y/n was the first one to find his voice. "I lost everything when you broke up with me. And I had to take everything I was suddenly missing completely and make something new of hollow, broken pieces. I only chose Clarke because I refused to choose you. Not again - never again. You did this. You don't get to be mad about it."

Bellamy scoffed. "I'm not mad about it." Y/n sucked in a breath to start arguing again but Bellamy had had enough. "I'm jealous."

Y/n produced a sound that was half a scoff and half a laugh. "Please. What do you have to be jealous of?"

Suddenly exhausted, all Bellamy had left was the truth. "I knew I had to get on this ship and come to Earth with Octavia. I knew I had to be free, even if it was toxic down here. Even if it killed me. I couldn't be alive in a world where I would always be the one who got to live. Not when she was killed for being born after me. I... couldn't." Y/n's words never came. He just sighed, leaning against the wall with an irritated thud. He had heard the rant before. He knew where this was going. Or, so he thought. Bellamy's next words caught him off guard. "I could never ask you to make that sacrifice. But, if you knew, you'd have agreed. Even if it would kill you. And I also couldn't let my trauma be the death of you either. Not when it was already the end of me and my sister."

Eyes wide, Y/n looked at him. There was something else in his face than that empty gloominess. Something... akin to hope. "You can't do this to me. Not now."

Bellamy closed his eyes. "I'm sorry."

"No-" Y/n pushed off the wall, shaking his head. "You don't get my forgiveness now. Not after everything! It's not fair!"

Bellamy's eyes filled with tears. "I'm sorry."

"NO!" Y/n yelled, grabbing his shirt by the collar. Bellamy's lips parted to apologize and Y/n slammed him against the cave wall, face twisted with rage. "Don't. Say. It. Again."

For a moment, it seemed like he wouldn't. Then, ever so softly, he whispered, "I'm sorry."

Immediately Y/n's face crumbled. He searched Bellamy's face, demanding to see anything other than what he was seeing. Regret. Sincerity. And love.

There was only one way to know for sure.

Y/n kissed Bellamy. He was immediately hit with how eagerly Bellamy kissed back. It was like, despite everything, anything that could have ruined this moment didn't matter. People had died, they were losing numbers, going hungry. This place was so much harder than they thought and everything was out to kill them. People they knew nothing about, couldn't even see, or a landscape that crept slowly and attacked when you least expected it. Time and space and heartbreak -

And in this moment it was just them.

When Y/n leaned back, he was smiling. Really smiling. "You're an idiot. I can't believe I love you."

Bellamy melted in relief. He pulled Y/n close and even with how impossible it had all seemed, it had worked out. "I am an idiot," he agreed. Y/n chuckled and Bellamy closed his eyes to hear the sound. The sound he never thought he'd be blessed enough to hear ever again. Maybe if Y/n could still smile and laugh, and Bellamy could still get the boy, anything could happen. Maybe there was still a chance in this ruined world. Even as dire as it seemed... maybe hope could be allowed.

Just a little. Just enough.

#Bellamy Blake #the 100 #bellamy blake x reader #bellamy blake imagine #Bellamy Blake x male reader #the 100 imagine #the 100 x reader #the 100 x male reader

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enstarriedownbad · 9 months

Text

Izumi Sena x F!reader

! Minors DNI

Genre: smut

Tags: dom!Izumi, reverse yandere (?), unrequited love (?), beach, rough, semi-public

Note: This is part 2 of my first Izumi smut fic link here

Plot: Trickstar and Knights invite you to the beach after you cleared the misunderstanding between you and Izumi. However, both of you don't know how to interact anymore. Maybe "having fun" at the beach together will fix your relationship?

Words: 4,084

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Your friends are playing board games in the shades of the beach umbrellas. And some others are playing beach volleyball, and then there's Ritsu. Sleeping. Makoto is playing the team sport, too. Apparently, his team just won the game. Izumi is witnessing a few of Makoto's teammates hugging him after winning. Yet somehow, Izumi doesn't feel jealous. Sure, he'd like to be part of the moment, but it feels platonic. He'd rather support him from the sides while wearing Trickstar merch or so. As for Leo, he's still true to himself, laughing out loud, teasing Tsukasa while they're playing Uno. But Izumi isn't looking at Leo right now. His eyes are drawn to someone else: you.

You seem busy playing with the other boys. Your smile looks radiant, even from afar. 'Who is it you are talking to?', he wonders. You only greeted him after you arrived, and now it seems you won't even look at him. What is it that he is feeling? Is it anger? Frustration, maybe? He needs to figure it out.

"What do you think you're doing?" Izumi asks you out of the blue. "Why are you..." he sighs. "You know what, just come and follow me."

You oblige. He brings you further apart from the rest of the group. Makoto and Leo exchange a silly "we did it" eye contact when seeing the two of you walk away on the sand, unaware of what happened last time.

It seems Izumi wants to talk to you on a one-to-one, even willing to walk a bit far away from the others to get some privacy. Thank goodness he finally takes action to have a chat with you. It has gotten really awkward between you two after last time. And a few weeks already passed without contacting each other.

You two get behind a rock on the beach. Izumi doesn't fail to make you feel intimidated as he corners you behind it, making your back's skin get in contact with the harsh material. Izumi even asserts himself even more by placing his arm right on top of you. It looks like there is no way out of this conversation...

"So you're just gonna pretend... Whatever. You are not fooling anyone, and you're definitely not fooling me," he says aggressively.

"What do you mean?" you ask timidly.

"You haven't even looked at me the entire day yet you said you like me?" he responds. "You kept smiling for the others, though. That's not what I call love."

"That's because..." you mutter.

"Because what? I can't hear you," he asks while getting his face closer to yours.

"Because I know you don't even like me back..." you reply. "So I don't know how to react around you."

"Hmm... Sounds like a lie to me," he doesn't back down. "I know how it feels to go through an unrequited love, yet you don't---"

"Do you really, though?" you cut him.

"What?" he replies while strongly staring at you.

"Do you really love someone romantically? For Makoto, or for Leo, it looks more like friendship, if anything."

Izumi looks down on you with a cold gaze.

"Really? Then, Miss I-know-better-than-you, go ahead and enlighten me," he sarcastically says, mad about the fact that you doubt his feelings.

You take a few seconds to think about your answer. Some waves hit the rock. Its sound is relaxing. The sun is not too bright, and the sky seems bluer than earlier. And the others can't see you thanks to the location. The setting looks perfect for this moment. You take your chance.

"When you love someone, you want to be with them all the time," you say.

"I know. That's why I even kidnapped Makoto once, even though I'm not really proud of it..."

"You want to make them smile," you say.

"Been there, done that. Why do you think I've been helping Leo after a certain event?"

"You want them to be only yours..."

"I agree. Is that why you're pissed off right now? Because the person I'm into is not you?"

"You feel flustered when they're too close to you..." you say while avoiding looking into his eyes.

"I kno-" Izumi stops himself. After hearing what you said, he takes a good look at you. He finally realizes that you are blushing right now and can't keep eye contact with him. And it is all his fault, as he put himself this close to you in order to intimidate you. It is no wonder you are all red. After all, you love him. And he knows that. Nonetheless, with your feelings being so obvious now, the man is wondering why he put himself in a situation like this. He's so close to the woman that likes him, plus it had to be in this position. How can he not be flustered? Of course, he is. He is a man, after all. He's no exception. He seems to be slightly blushing. He thinks you look stupid to be all awkward around him. But, he also thinks you look somewhat cute, and your swimsuit is definitely something that man likes to see. He takes a longer look at your outfit and body from up close.

Even before your last interaction in the hotel, Izumi realizes you weren't distant with him like he thought, but rather shy. And even more shy when it was just the two of you. Yet you were always so sweet to him.

Well. It looks like he is curious, -or just simply put- interested in you. But Izumi, being Izumi, he won't admit it to himself. He would rather lie to himself and to others about his true feelings because of his ego. Now, he is afraid the next thing you'll say will make him realize something. You better not say one more word.

You don't even notice the switch in the nature of Izumi's gaze as you stopped directly looking into his eyes. So, you continue to prove yourself to him.

"When you love them, you--" Izumi stops you from continuing your sentence as he suddenly kisses you.

He goes all the way in, with his tongue intertwining with yours. You let out a small noise from the surprise. Izumi continues passionately kissing you. He grabs you by the waist while keeping his pace as steady as possible. His grip on your body gets stronger, and his lips don't seem to want to leave yours. His knee finds its way between your thighs, grinding into your sensitive area. That's it. He has desires.

Izumi backs up, panting, looking at you with redness all over his cheeks. You are the same, sweating and looking at him with doe eyes. He just wanted to make you shut up. Surely, there could have been another way. But now, he... No. He doesn't want to review his opinion. The man assumes changing his mind would make him look dumb and indecisive, even though it would be the opposite. He would rather continue with his lie.

"That's only a fraction of the love you'll never get," he lies while unable to look at you in the eyes anymore. "That's how I would kiss a person I love. Is that enough proof for you now?"

You feel discouraged by his words right after he just did this to you out of the blue. 'That was how much he loves someone', you think, wishing that were you.

On the other hand, Izumi looks at you in disbelief, unaware of the nature of what he is feeling right now. Surely, he felt the same with whom he "loves", right? He just didn't notice it, right? Izumi starts doubting his feelings. But that's when his own body gives him a hint. Outside of the blushing, another compelling piece of evidence can be found: he's rock-hard at this very moment. And the object of his desires is right here, in front of him, expecting to be told to go to hell or so.

"Turn around," he says.

"Why?" you ask.

"Just do it."

You do as he says.

"Now put your hands in front of you."

You place your hands against the rock.

"You're really doing anything I ask you to, huh?" he says while pressing himself onto you from behind.

Now, you can definitely feel something poking against your back. You slightly turn your head around to face him.

"Hm... Don't get any wrong ideas," he whispers in your right ear. "But I'm like 'this' because of you. I can't go back to everyone in this state. You should take care of it since it's all your fault."

Everything is telling you that he got hard thinking of someone else while kissing you, but you don't even care right now, you just want Izumi.

"...Sure," you reply, knowing what will happen next.

Izumi doesn't wait for a second and lowers down the bottom part of your swimsuit, gets his cock out of his own, and places his tip at your entrance.

"I'm going to ravage your insides from behind. I'm guessing that's okay with you since you really are a..." he stops mid-way. "Since I already did it last time, right?"

"Yes...," you answer, somehow surprised that he only subtly insulted you compared to last time.

With his hands placed on both of your hips, Izumi slides himself inside you. It definitely hurts since just a minute ago, you weren't expecting him to take you from behind. But it feels good. It's so nice to be connected again. Your two bodies were longing for each other. Simply having him in you gets you aroused.

"Hm? Did you just get wet only from me penetrating you?" Izumi rhetorically asks. "I can't say I'm not flattered, though, but now I..." He doesn't finish his sentence but his dick speaks on his behalf, hardening inside you. "Then, I hope you're ready for what's coming."

Izumi begins ramming into your folds from behind while holding onto your hips. Every thrust is as hard as last time. You get fully wet in no time. His length presses against your sensitive spots every time he moves. You can't help but moan.

"Shhh, you don't want someone to hear us," Izumi tells you while fastening the pace.

Although you need to keep your voice down, feeling Izumi's hands on your skin, as well as his cock sketching your walls with his every thrust makes you let out some more high-pitched sounds.

"Izumi...!" you quietly moan.

To your surprise, Izumi doesn't tell you to stop and he even whimpers from pleasure as well. Small "ahhn"s or "mmnh"s keep leaving his mouth more and more frequently. You never knew faint sounds like these could sound so hot and provocative. His voice sounds so deep yet relaxing. His timbre, his pitch, everything about his voice makes you fall more deeply in love with him. His moans became your new favorite melody for sure.

Now, the sea is not the only wet noise you can hear: Izumi is making a mess out of you right now. What first started quite dry quickly became a mix of bodily fluids thanks to your shared lust. Both of you really seem into it. Every time he thrusts in and out of you, you feel yourself losing it. You want to leave everything to him. You want him to go even rougher.

"Ahh... mmh," Izumi moans. "I'm close... mnh... Y/N," he says as you can feel his precum coming out, making your cunt even more slippery. "Yea just like that..." he groans.

The fact that he finally pronounced your name while moaning with pleasure was such a welcomed sound to your ears that it made your body tighten around his cock. Izumi keeps fucking you from behind, with his thighs aggressively bumping against your cheeks. The man keeps hitting your cervix with his dick as if he were trying to claim more of you. You feel your mind losing it, approaching your climax as well.

"Izumi... ah Izumi... Izumi..." you moan gradually louder. "You can... do it inside... Today is a safe day."

"hahh... Really? Then, I won't pass on this offer," he tells you while groaning and thrusting quicker.

You arch your back from the pleasure, making him bend over you as a result. From this angle, you can definitely see his hips thrusting in and out of you rapidly.

"mhhn. I'm going to... cum..." Izumi says while giving his last thrusts.

"ha hahn~ Izumi!" you moan out loud while cumming.

With his dick pressed against your end, Izumi strengthens his grip on your hips, moves your body even closer to his, and has an orgasm inside your walls. His semen feels you up from the inside. The sensation is so exquisite that your mind goes numb for a minute, only able to concentrate on his cum.

Once he is done with his orgasm, your heat keeps his member warm, still feeling very aroused. After he finally pulls out, your legs get so weak from the intercourse that you fall on all fours on the floor without Izumi's support.

"Don't tell me that you thought I would be done with you in only one round," he says while grinning and going on his knees behind you. "You want to be taken doggy style, huh? Typical of you, if I may. But that side of you is also making me..."

You assume he wanted to say "mad" or "disgusted," but he meant something else, something that has to do with how much he wants you right now, already rutting against you.

Izumi quickly sinks into your heat again, not able to wait.

"I'm gonna put my hands over your mouth if you can't be quiet. I don't want you to moan my name out loud again like you did earlier," he says. "Not that I mind, but..." he whispers as he puts his hand over your mouth. "I don't want other people to hear us."

"Mhh," you can only reply as your ability to speak just got restricted.

While the lower part of his body is busy messing up with your folds and making a mess out of you, Izumi uses his hands to play with your body. With his other hand that is not over your mouth, your loved one uses his fingers to brush over your back all the way down, making you feel all tingly. His hand caressing your skin makes you feel so good. You two were already 'one' after Izumi put his length inside of you, but somehow, having his skin against your own makes this moment feel even more intimate.

Then, Izumi pauses and gets his mouth close to your ear.

"Prepare yourself," he whispers in a deep timbre.

The man bends his back over you, trapping you below him as he resumes his thrusts, way more aggressively, with a hand on your hips. Now, the loudest sound is neither the sea, nor the radio music from the beach or your voice, but the wet noises coming out of you both.

"Mhhn," you mumble under his hand as he's pounding you from behind.

"Don't come now," he tells you as he moves his hand over your thighs, reaching for your clit.

Once he gets there, the male begins rubbing it along with his rapid thrusts, making you unable to resist long. You can't help but moan even though Izumi's hand remains firmly against your mouth.

"Just a bit longer..." he says while enjoying your faint noises.

While you struggle not to come immediately even though your body longs for it, Izumi doesn't go soft on you and continues going harder and harder against your sensitive spots.

"oh yea..." Izumi moans against his breaths. "Just like that..."

All your brain can focus on is Izumi, you want him to let it all out right now. His close embrace is also making your body temperature reach high grounds. Tears are forming in your eyes from the pleasure.

"Nhg. I'm... gonna... cum," Izumi says as his shaft is hitting against your cervix as if it were a punching ball.

Your moans are vibrating against the palm of his hand.

"Hahh, Y/N...!"

Following his moans, Izumi cums deep inside you, releasing all of his semen in your womb. More than just filling you up again, the feeling is even better. And you are not the only one moaning, Izumi definitely is, too. 'ah's and its variations keep leaving his mouth.

"Good..." he whispers.

You can feel his cock twitching, letting even more sperm enter you. You thought you couldn't get any hotter after Izumi shared his body heat with yours in a late summer afternoon, but his liquid is definitely on the hotter side, warming you even more. Maybe you feel a bit too hot now.

As soon as Izumi pulls out, the two of you lay on the sand, panting. That was quite the experience for sure. He was not kidding when he said he'd ravage your insides.

Izumi unconsciously looks at you with a devoted gaze, to which you return the same love stare. But Izumi only realizes now that you two have been silently staring at each other for a solid minute.

"I-" he doesn't know where to start, "Let's go back to the others. We've been out for a while now. They may be wondering where we are."

"Yea, but give me a second to..." you say while panting, "rest a bit..."

Izumi recognizes that you are tired. Specifically, because of him. He finally lets a bit of his pride go, 'just for now,' he tells himself. But you know how Izumi is with those he loves, right? His affection shows no limit. And it's the same for you now.

Izumi stands up and holds out his hand to you. He sighs.

"Come on, let's cool off in the water. I'll help you," he tells you nonchalantly.

He's taken aback by the fact that he wants to take care of you, as if it was a natural thing. But by now, he thinks he has an idea of what he feels for you.

You take his hand, and the two of you walk toward the sea. Izumi helps you get in the water, slowly. Your body and your legs specifically are so tired that you trip over.

Luckily for you, Izumi was looking out for you and caught you before you fell head-first into the water. Looks like you are now in his embrace, with his arms clasping you, pressing your head against his chest.

The sea is so refreshing. His tight hug feels safe. This moment is so soothing. But you know it will not last long. After all, he told you he doesn't like you and did all this to prove a point. If anything, it hurts to love him. You want to enjoy each and every moment you share with him, even if it is bittersweet at the end.

"Izumi..." you initiate the dialogue.

"Hm?" he replies gently for once.

"Can we stay like this just a bit longer?" you ask as you cling to him, not wanting to overthink about how he doesn't reciprocate your feelings.

It doesn't take him long to decide. Of course he wants to be close to you right now. Because on his side, he realized the true nature of his inquisitiveness toward you.

"I can do that for you, Y/N," he replies gently while obviously sounding enthusiastic about the idea, holding you tighter.

The two of you stay like this for a moment, enjoying each other's presence and feeling your fling growing stronger.

The sun is about to set now. Maybe a quarter of an hour passed?

"... ...Y/N", you vaguely hear.

"...YN.."

"Mh?" you reply a bit groggy after resting against Izumi for a while.

"Maybe we should go back now. The others must be wondering where we went."

"Okay..." you reply while you two get out of the water. "Ah, it's so cold!" you say as you leave the warm water only to be met with a cold wind.

You shiver from the temperature difference and put your arms around you. One look was enough for Izumi.

"You wait in the water, I'll quickly get you a towel back there," he kindly orders as he goes back to where Trickstar and the rest of Knights are.

While waiting in the water flow, you see a few men approaching you. They look a bit too enthusiastic, probably drunk.

"Guys, this girl over there, she's pretty cute right? She's mine," you can hear in the distance.

"Not if I seduce her before you" another one replies. "I can do that without even trying. And you got no rizz anyway."

"Then, let's see which one of us pulls her first."

"Hi there," one of them reaches out to you as they get closer, "are you alone? Wanna join us?"

"... Sorry but--"

"That's not how you approach a lady, dumbass. Let me show you how to do it," one says to his friends while cutting you off. "So, miss, do you have a boyfriend?"

"I... I don't," you reply, after remembering that although you seem closer to Izumi after your discussion, he definitely made sure to let you know that you don't own his heart.

"Then, how about I keep you company? You and I, let's have a nice time together at the beach," he asks.

"I don't know about that, I came with my friends," you reply while getting anxious as you are a bit away from the group.

"Hmm. I don't see anyone around here right now... So come with us. We want to have fun with you," another one suggests.

He even goes as far as grabbing your arm to get you out of the water.

"Come on, quit being so tense and follow us," he says as he gets you on the sand.

"... What are you doing to my girlfriend? Do you want to die?" Izumi says as he pulls the guy away from you and places himself between you and the other men. "She's already with me. Back. Off. Now," he shoos them away with a death stare.

After they leave, he turns around to face you.

"Geez, I leave you alone for two minutes, and you already need my help?" he complains while wrapping you in a towel. "I don't want you to get a cold," he says affectionately.

You look at him in awe. There is no way you would accept someone taking him from you when he acts so considerate towards you right now.

"Izumi?" you initiate.

"Mh?"

"I love you," you confess again. "I will try to win your heart, even if it is taken right now. "

"Y/N, I think I--"

"So this is where you were!" a voice says in the distance.

"We went looking for you two after you left for so long," Makoto appears before you.

"Yuu-kun!" Izumi calls out to him.

"Wait. Izumi-san and Y/N-chan," he smirks. "Seeing you two like this, do you happen to... To be a thing?" your friend asks, hopeful, as he tries to help you get closer to Izumi.

"Me and Y/N...?" Izumi replies. "We..."

Before he gets to reply, some of the other guys join you.

"N-never mind, I was just joking," he brushes it off, not wanting to put you or Izumi on a spot in front of everyone.

"Then~ Now that we've found them, let's go back to our hotel! ☆" Leo suggests.

"Who is gonna carry Ritsu-senpai to the HOTEL, though?" Tsukasa asks.

"Don't tell me that guy is still sleeping?" Izumi replies, annoyed.

"Yea... Even though the sun is about to set, Ritsu still feels a bit tired after being exposed to the sun for so long. I guess I'll have to carry him on my back," Mao sighs.

"Waa, Sari, you're such a good friend! ☆" Subaru adds.

"Then, let's go back to Sakuma and the others," Hokuto concludes.

Your little group begins leaving the area. The others walk in front of you. You and Izumi are behind them.

"What about you, Y/N? Don't you feel tired?" Izumi asks, sweetly. "Here, take my hand," the one you love says as he hands out his hand to you again.

You gladly accept his offer. You two walk hand in hand as the sunset colors the sea in orange hues.

Next chapter preview: "Eh..? What are you doing here Y/N? This isn't your room."

"I know."

"And why are you still dressed like this?"

(Could change)

HIIIIIIIIIIIIII 👤💛✨️🔆✴️💫

I missed yall!!!! Sorry, I was so busy irl omg wtf! 👤

So that was the long awaited part 2! Guess what? I'm gonna write a part 3 too 👤💖 The plot is so fun to write for honestly (or more like, we can fix Izumi.) 👤🖤

Next is gonna be Leo, or Kuro, or part 3, idk!!! 👤⁉️ Tell me which one you've been waiting for, and I'll write it soon enough 👤‼️

Love yall 👤💯❤️

#izumi sena x reader #enstars smut #enstars x reader #izumi sena smut #enstars x you #ensemble stars x y/n #izumi sena x reader smut #enstars thirst #enstars thirsts #ensemble stars smut #ensemble stars x you #enstars x y/n #ensemble stars x reader #enstars x reader smut #ensemble stars x reader smut #enstars x female reader #enstars fanfic

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valiantphantomangel · 3 months

Text

Captain purple

A/n: A big thank you to the anon who sent me a bunch of ideas, it was such a huge help! I hope y'all enjoy it!😊

You loved pranking your big brother, Steve.

Favorite past time ever and you had gotten good at it, if I do say so myself.

So when you get bored from your homework that was spread out over you desk you grabbed a bottle of purple hair dye (don't ask why you have that) and sneaked into Steve's rooms which was across the hall from yours.

Quiet like a mouse you tip toe into his bathroom and put the ENTIRE bottle of hair dye in his shampoo, you carefully put it back to where he placed it and ran into your room again.

After doing some homework (lies) you got a call to hang out with your friends so you quickly grabbed your jacket and shoes before running downstairs.

Just hearing the shower running in Steve's room.

"Hey Y/N your brother is on tv"! Your best friend Sarah called out (you can change this if this is your name) as you all were sitting in a cafe.

You turned around and nearly spat out your drink, Steve was giving an interview about the next moves for the avengers... With bright purple hair.

"Oh my god it was a permanent hair dye" you said before rolling with laughter, the caption under the interview said 'captain purple' which didn't help you laughter.

"I can't breathe"! Your friends called out over their laughter since they had met your brother multiple times.

"Oh I'm in so much trouble when I get home" you said with wide eyes as your laughing calmed down.

A few hours later you sneak back into the tower, hoping to avoid Steve but luck wasn't on your side.

Just as you unlock your room in the tower and walk in you see Steve standing there in the middle of the room with his arms crossed.

He would have been very intimidating.

If it wasn't for his bright purple hair.

You look at him with pursed lips trying not to laugh, but one more look at him got you giggling.

"You know I had to give a very serious speech on tv, yet no one took me seriously" Steve said as he walked over to you.

"I wonder why" you giggle as you look up at him.

"oh I'll give you something to laugh about" he said with a playful growl and ran towards you before throwing you over his shoulder.

"Steve put me down"!

He just chuckled and walked into the living room before throwing you gently on to the couch, sitting down on your thighs to keep you pinned.

"What are you doing?" You said confused as you looked up at him.

"Remember what I used to do when we were little and you were causing trouble around the neighborhood"? Steve asked innocently as he lightly traced your tummy.

You stared up at him with wide eyes, he couldn't possibly remember that, no absolutely not.

"Oh I see you remember" he said with a grin

"I'm not ticklish anymore stevEEKHIHI" you shrieked as he suddenly digged into your sides.

"Right, because that sounded convincing" He said sarcastic before looking at you with a smirk that could match Loki's.

"No don't you dareHIHIHIHI STOPHAHAH ITHIHIH" you burst out laughing and squirmed around trying to escape his ticklish fingers that danced over your ribs.

Steve laughed menacingly and leaned down to blow a raspberry in your neck, rubbing his beard over your neck.

You absolutely went mad with laughter and trashed around.

"DAMM YOU AHHHAHAHAHA"!!

"Language"

This went on forever until he decided to give you a breather and let you sit up.

"Now are you going to apologize?" He asked with a raised eyebrow as he got off of you.

"I'm sorryhihihi" you apologized through the remaining giggles.

You looked at him when you got your breath back and repeated it "I'm sorry... Captain Purple" you grinned before sprinting away.

"Get back here Y/N" Steve yelled and ran after you with a smile on his lips, he was so happy to finally spend time with his little sister and make up for the time you guys lost, like the big brother he is.

#tickle fic #marvel tickle #lee!reader #ticklish!reader #ticklish ribs #request #tickle punishment #steve rogers #ler!steve #steve rogers × little sister #prank #hair dye #purple #giggles

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deathmetalunicorn1 · 11 months

Note

I've been wondering... how would Poseidon react if he saw Apollo flirting with his (gn)s/o? (Taking into account that Poseidon and reader have yet to publicly reveal that they are together)

-It was technically your fault, well both yours and Poseidon’s fault, as you weren’t public about your relationship with one another. Nobody, other than Hades and Aphrodite, knew that the two of you were dating and had been dating for a long time.

-However, you were both almost always seen together, so many chose not to approach, mainly as many were afraid of Poseidon, finding him too intimidating to approach.

-But that’s why he liked you, you weren’t afraid of him, you treated him like a friend, and Poseidon didn’t have anyone like that, and you found that under his stoic mask, he was reserved, smart, and had a warm heart, it was just closed off and took time to get to.

-You were like a wrecking ball, you busted into his life, or so he says, like a ray of sunshine, lighting up his world and warming his heart and now he couldn’t think of a life without you by his side.

-However, since you were private about your relationship, nobody knew, which meant that there were men who would try to approach you and a few women who would get brave enough to approach Poseidon, but usually you both could handle yourselves.

-That is…until the day you met Apollo, he was very forward with you, getting into your personal space and unlike others whom you could get to leave you alone, he was very persistent and wasn’t taking no for an answer!

-When you were late to your date with Poseidon, just meeting at your favorite café for a break, he came looking for you, and finding you with Apollo of all people.

-Poseidon was instantly annoyed, seeing that you were looking uncomfortable, but angry, as Apollo wasn’t backing off, even though you were past the point of being nice, telling him to back off, but to Apollo, he saw it as you being shy and just needed a bit more of a push.

-Poseidon’s hand clapped down on your shoulder and you turned your head and instantly relaxed, “Oh thank cupcakes you’re here!” you instantly stepped behind your lover who faced Apollo, the sun god looking a bit confused, “Poseidon, why are you here? Do you know Y/N?”

-Poseidon didn’t care that you all were in public, as he glared, “I do, she’s my lover.”

-Jaws dropped all around and your bright smile that he finally admitted it, seemed to light up everything around you as you hugged him from behind.

-Apollo was stunned, hearing that you were with Poseidon, before he quickly rebounded, “Are you up to having a third part-” Poseidon shoved his hand into Apollo’s face, silencing him, “Not happening!”

-Apollo whined, following after Poseidon, trying to beg him into letting him join in with you and Poseidon; your lover turned with a dark, menacing look in his eyes, one that only said pain before he spoke, “I don’t share.”

-Your cheeks turned a bit red at his declaration as Apollo was gawking open mouthed, stunned by Poseidon’s bold statement before he took your hand, leading you away, no longer willing to go to the café.

-He was taking you home so he could hold you and pout, as he was annoyed, but you were happy to cuddle with him, leaving Apollo out in the cold.

-You were happy that you didn’t have to be quiet about it in public anymore. You could finally hold his hand when out and about with him. Life was good.

#record of ragnarok #ror x reader #ror poseidon #ror apollo

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epiclamer · 1 year

Text

OH HERE IT GOES AGAIN—

Good, Evil or Incapacitated

When Hero finally had the strength to wake up they groaned with the pain of bright lights overhead infiltrating their eyes. Softer than the LEDs from a medical room or hospital, but the burning was harsh nonetheless as it helped fuel their thumping headache.

Muted music played from a speaker nearby and the sound of someone singing off tune flowed choppily alongside. The smell of beef stew floated through the air as well as a constant clattering of spoon against bowl.

Everything around them felt so far away, like they were underwater and pain was the only receptor in their body that was working.

Shakily, Hero tried to pull themselves up off the couch they were laying on. Their brain cloudily registering that their mask was still on and their suit was in tatters from their chest down. Whatever else was touching their skin was put there by the stranger in the room.

They shivered at the thought of it being one of their enemies. A sadistic fuck that wanted to keep them here forever as their servant and plaything.

A villain that would go to the lengths of saving their life and healing their body, just to hurt them all over again.

Instead, as their body collapsed back against the squeaky sofa, they came face to face with the end of metal baseball bat and a very cautious looking civilian. They flinched and whimpered when it strained their wounds, closing their eyes and turning their head away.

“Don’t. Move.”

Hero didn’t need to be told twice, they were tired enough as it was. Even the slightest of movements were agonizing and exhausting.

They could hear the civilian taking careful steps forwards, the presence of the bat never leaving the hero’s senses. Unconciously their body braced for an attack, but it never came.

“You’re Hero, right?”

The question seemed so out of place in the moment, couldn’t they tell? Wasn’t it obvious with the emblem on their chest?

Hero peeled their eyes back open to a squint, taking a good look at their suit when they realized just how much blood the fabric had soaked up. Maybe the civilian had a point in asking…

“Y-yeah…” They coughed, unable to breathe through the shreds their throat was in from the dryness.

Tentatively, the other pushed a small side table closer. On which sat a glass of fresh water and a few pills that looked like ibuprofen. Hero reached for it with an uncoordinated hand and only spilt about half before it reached their chapped lips.

The civilian seemed unimpressed, lowering the bat slightly when they were sure the hero wasn’t going to be a hazard. Watching closely as the crime-stopper emptied the glass in a second, down their scratchy throat, before giving up and dropping it to the floor with a worn out huff.

“I-I’m on the g-good side, yknow? Y-you can put that thing d-down… I-I won’t hurt you.” Talking felt like a crime in itself, using their only strength to try and defend their innocence when they looked like something straight out of a horror film.

“I don’t care what you are.” The other shrugged, eyeing the hero defiantly. “Good, bad, sad, mad, happy, whatever. I couldn’t care less.”

Hero winced at how loud their voice was to their ears, even if they were sure the civilian was chatting casually it didn’t help their headache. “F-for someone so indifferent—” They grunted as they shifted their position. “Y-you seem awfully a-afraid.”

The civilian didn’t move, a puzzled look in their eyes before it seemed to dawn on them. “Oh, this thing?” They tossed the bat in the air with a spin, barely catching it as it came down. “This is merely to intimidate. At least, it’s harmless until you give me a reason to harm.”

“I c-come in peace…” Hero joked, holding their hands up peacefully but not with ease, they set them back down as the joke fell flat. “I-I’m guessing you d-don’t like supers?”

“Not since one of your little spats blew up my old house. No, never really been a fan.”

If the situation could’ve gotten anymore awkward, it did. Fights between heroes and villains could get bad and destruction was a given at this point, but having to actually encounter the affected was always the hardest part.

Now, they were at their mercy. Hero was beginning to think that a vengeful villain would’ve been a better kidnapper, rather than an angry civilian with a bat.

They couldn’t tell if it was the fever giving them the sweats or their own fear.

And now that they were really looking at it, the weapon was littered with dents and stains. Some brown and faded, others looked like they had been imprinted that same day. Bile rose up their throat when they could see blood that was still sticky coating the end.

“F-freshly used, huh?”

The civilian flipped the bat around effortlessly, one might’ve mistaken it for a dance. They raised their brows at the red before dropping it back to face the hero. “Had to use it this morning on your little friend. Tried to kill me the second they woke up.”

Hero must of visibly paled because the civilian’s lips curled into a self-satisfied smirk. Lazily, they walked over to a door across from where the hero laid, placing a hand on the door handle and turning it. Slowly revealing the room behind it.

“S-Sidekick?”

Through the darkness, Hero could barely make out the shape of an individual, hands tied to the headboard of a bed and white—almost florescent—bandages covering almost every tear in their uniform. At first the only imaginable person it could’ve been was Sidekick, but as their eyes adjusted…

“Say hello to your new roommate; Villain.”

280 notes · View notes

writingsfromhome · 4 months

Text

Red Rose II

A/N: Did some more work on this series. It’s one of the first fics I ever posted here (2020!?!) but felt writer’s block every time I tried to continue. The story is finally shaping up in my head though. It deals with fantastical elements. I’d say it’s not exactly my average fic…

Part 1 / 2 / 3 / 4

—————————

My head is pounding like a bass drum when I wake up, the room I’m in is too dark to see but the sliver of light coming from below the curtains gives the day away. I try to make out the room around me, the night comes back to me in bits.

I must be at the handsome bloke’s-Harry it was. I remember, Harry offered to let me crash at his. I gently turn to stare at the spot next to me but it looks made. He slept somewhere else—he really was a gentleman.

My body creaks as I pivot off the bed and onto the plush carpet. With the softness of the covers and the quality of the carpet, I figured Harry was well off. Compared to my Ikea flat, and synthetic rugs, this was a castle.

I find the light switch and the brightness assaults my sensitive eyes, but I make out a bathroom off to the side. Sweet.

I looked horrible; as hard as I’d done myself up last night I had undone myself in the hours following. And looking at my puffy face and raccoon eyes, I could barely believe Harry wasn’t more afraid of me. Maybe he just pitied me.

By the time I walk back into the room, the curtains have been pushed open, the bed made, and a plain black tee and palazzo pants in my size lay on the bed. It looks exactly like something I would wear on my day off. A glass of water and two painkillers sit on the sidetable. There was no way Harry did all this, how did he find clothes in my size? And why would he make my bed?

I leave the questions for later and take the painkillers (after double checking the label), take the clothes back into the shower and wash the weird night away. It’s not hard finding the kitchen from the smell of coffee and baked goods.

I find Harry sitting in a robe on the balcony off to an open concept kitchen. Two women prepare breakfast, in uniform—so they definitely weren’t family, and another man in uniform stands outside. He definitely didn’t make my bed. I quietly head out to Harry.

“Once I can, that’s all she needs to know.” Harry sips a coffee with his back to me. The man outside only nods to me before going back in.

“Rose,” Harry says. I jump, how did he know I was here. “I can see your reflection in the glass.”

“Do you read minds or something?” I ask as I walk into his view and settle into the chair opposite him.

“Or something,” he smiles. From what I remember from yesterday, he was big and bold and broody but this morning his face is lit from below and he doesn’t seem as intimidating—it holds a kindness that was missing yesterday. At an angle, he looks almost harmless. Almost.

“Thanks for...well for everything.” I wasn’t sure how to approach his kindness. I knew everything came with a price, Harry was being really nice, he’d kept to his word and left me to recover, but I didn’t know why. That made me uneasy. As I think it, Harry fixes me with a stare, waiting for me to continue but I don’t know what to say so I babble. “I usually don’t do this, follow strangers home. But last night was kind of really awful and-shit, Jeremy! I..”

I pat my pockets out of habit but of course my phone isn’t there. I look up and my phone is on the table. I grab it, and look up, Harry continues to stare as if he was watching a rat in a maze he’d constructed and a chill goes down my spine.

Leave it up to me to make things weird.

My train of thoughts freak me out so I just excuse myself and go inside, my screen isn’t cracked anymore. I run my finger over the screen to make sure but it’s entirely smooth. Was I hallucinating yesterday?

“Y/N, why are you calling so bloody early?” Jeremy’s sleepy voice answers the phone. I check the room and spot the time on the fridge. 8:44.

“Sorry, must be the jet lag. I just want you to know I’m okay.”

“What? Why wouldn’t you be?” I hear him shuffling.

“I...” I realise he knew absolutely nothing from yesterday. I never called him-he probably thinks I’m still at my ex’s! “I’m sorry Jer go back to bed. I’ll explain later.”

He grumbles something but he sounds half-asleep already. I tuck my phone into my pocket and go back outside. The women have disappeared and a buffet is laid out in front of Harry. He points to my seat and I take it.

“Wow,” I was at a loss for words. But I ask, “Did you fix my phone?”

“It fell out of your pocket when I was helping you to bed.” Harry says. “I cracked the screen so I fixed it. Brought it out here for when you had breakfast.”

“Oh no, I um, I actually broke it last night!” I pull it out with a nervous laugh. How did he fix it? “I got angry and sort of...yeah, anyway, that’s the nicest thing anyone’s done for me. I really...I’m actually overwhelmed with how nice you’re being.” My laugh comes out in a rush of air, I’m trying to figure this man out. He didn’t feel threatening but there were all these red flags that made it seem so.

He finally cracks a smile back and nods. “This is how a woman like yourself should be treated. Let’s just enjoy the feast, and enjoy the morning.”

I smile as he pours me coffee. Something in the back of my head wants to analyze everything about the man in front of me, his good looks and his good manners. But also the cold way he observes me versus the short bursts of sunshine in his laugh. His hand keeps brushing mine, and he makes me blush with his compliments. But he continues to call me Rose, he doesn’t even ask for my name again. So I don’t offer it.

“So do you do this often?” I ask. “Invite a stranger from a pub and take care of her?”

“I’ve been visiting The Good Folk for decades and I’ve never met a woman like you.”

My heart skips a beat, not at the compliment. He said decades, but he had less wrinkles than I did and I wasn’t even 30. How old was he?

“I bet you say that to all the women you take home,” I say.

“Yes,” he admits and I look up from my toast. He seems unfazed by his admission but he notices my expression, “What?”

“You just admitted to saying that to all the women you take home.”

“Yes?” He stares. “This is the first time I’ve taken a woman home from there.”

It sounds like a lie or a technicality but he’s entirely honest. And I don’t know how I know that.

The uniformed man suddenly appears and says something to Harry who excuses himself and leaves. Was he like Mr. Alfred, butler to a billionaire type? Harry sure was mysterious enough to have one.

I use the time alone to look around, the view showed an expanse of green fields and in the distance the skyline of London. I’d lived here all my life yet I couldn’t figure where exactly we were.

I look back inside, the place is spotless. Harry must be richer than I thought if he could afford a place like this and hire help. He was a gentleman with a streak of odd, I conclude.

I wanted to figure the odd bit out.

“Are you done with breakfast?” I jump when one of the women from earlier appears beside me. But on a closer look, she was a lot younger than me. Maybe around 15?

“I’m done. You’re quite young. What’s your name?”

She giggles and looks back to where the other women is watering the outdoor plants. When she turns at the sound of the giggles, I realise she was just as young. Was this even legal?

“I’m called Dot, that’s Oona.”

“Nice to meet you Dot.” I watch as she picks up a stack of plates. She was stronger than she looked but still I ask, “Do you need help?”

She just giggles again as if what I asked was absurd and simply carries the large stack inside. I decide to help anyway, feeling unusual if I sat while they cleared the table. It wasn’t something I was used to.

I drop the coffee cups off on the counter when Harry appears and pulls me away.

“What are you doing?” He demands.

“I’m just helping clear...” I turn to point to the girls but they stare at us. It reminds me of the weird motorcycle guy yesterday who offered to give me a ride home. They have the same look in their eyes and when I turn to Harry I can see why. His features are set in an aggressive expression. I didn’t know what I’d done except to help out, and I didn’t want the two girls to get in trouble.

“Harry I...” I touch his arm. “They didn’t ask or nothing, I was just sitting there and thought I could help. I’m not usually waited on...especially by girls younger than me so it was just weird to just sit there.”

His eyes slide from the two behind me to me, his expression softens ever so slightly. “We all have our roles. Let them do theirs. They’ve been in my employment for many years.”

“Okay,” I agree quickly. I wanted to move away from the tense room and shift Harry’s attention away from Dot and Oona. I would have to apologise later, I didn’t mean to get them in trouble. And maybe ask what their skin care tips were—there was no way Harry hired children so they must have amazing genetics.

“Did you have any plans today? I know you people usually go to work during the day,” Harry leads me to a large room that must be an office. I’m taken aback by his bluntness saying “my people”.

“We’re not all rich unfortunately,” I say passively. I couldn’t figure out if Harry was a good guy or not. One second he was kindly hosting me and the next he looks ready to throw his help out the window because I helped them.

“What do riches have to do with your plans?” Harry looks genuinely confused. He played aloof really well.

“My people?” I remind him.

“Yes, what do you do during the day?”

I shake my head. He was so confusing. “I usually have work but I’m off for the week. I thought I would spend today with...my ex. But after yesterday-“

“You deserve better. He doesn’t hold a candle to you.”

I laugh, slightly nervous having all his attention so close. “Right. That’s nice of you to say. But I seem to have a bad history with men, I don’t think I even know what I deserve at this point.”

“I thought it was human nature to follow your hearts?” Harry stops fiddling with the book in his hands and moves towards me. “Love makes the world go round or something like that?” Harry drags his fingers up and down my arm and I feel it in the pit of my stomach. “How can you not know what you deserve.”

“I...” words leave my mind as I lean in towards him. His touch empties me of thought and I just want more of him. But as I lean into him it’s like he realises what was happening. He jumps back, letting go of me and I straighten up.

“Uh,” Harry clears his throat, “I can’t-“ he looks to the door just as it creaks open, I immediately feel the familiar burn of embarassment that came with rejection. What was wrong with me? He kept making it clear he was just being nice, he wasn’t interested like that. Why did I react to him so strongly?

“What is it?” Harry sounds annoyed at whoever’s at the door. When I finally look, it’s the man from earlier. His Alfred.

“Your presence is needed at...” he glances at me and back at Harry.

“I told you, tell her I’ll get back to her once I can-“

“It’s quite urgent,” his butler’s eyes continue flicking between the both of us.

I check the time on my phone and the movement catches Harry’s attention. I avoid looking directly at him, “I should head back home now anyway. You’re obviously busy.”

“You don’t have to,” he says in a low voice. “You can stay as long as you need.”

“I’m pretty recovered from last night,” I smile. “I think I just have some of my things in the room I stayed in.”

“Dot will get it for you,” Harry puts his hand on my back as I walk to the door. His butler continues staring at us as he moves aside and follows us out.

Dot suddenly appears with my wallet and clothes from yesterday, laundered and smelling amazing.

“Wow,” I take them from her, scanning her face to be sure she was alright. She just gives me a bright smile contrasting her icy hands. “Thank you.” I tell her and turn back to Harry, “I can’t thank you enough for last night. I was a mess and...you helped. I seriously owe you one.”

Harry’s sharp gaze settles on me and I hear a gasp from Dot. It’s like the air was sucked out of the room, I glance back at Dot and her eyes are wide. His butler also looks startled. Were they okay?

“You don’t need to,” Harry finally says. “Consider it a kindness, not a favour.”

“No no,” I walk with Harry towards the front. His house was like a maze. “Nobody is ever this kind for no reason, I’ll make it up to you.” If there was anything life taught me, strangers didn’t do things out of pure kindness. I didn’t want strings down the road. I would rather just let him know I would return the favour and have that sit between us.

His expression is unreadable as he opens the door, a woman already stands outside with a car idling on the road. Woah.

“I accept,” Harry says. I raise my eyebrow, he had an odd way of talking. That’s what made him more intriguing.

On impulse, I go to press a quick kiss to his cheek but he jerks back. I back away, my cheeks aflame, and walk out with my things in hand. The woman opens my door for me and as hard as I try, I still glance back at Harry before I get in and give him a lame wave. His gaze never leaves mine, even after I sit in. He really did just do this to help me out, I read too much into it. He obviously didn’t feel the attraction I felt.

***

“You know that sounds completely made up? I’ve never even heard of The Good Folk.”

It’s late afternoon and I’m catching Jeremy up on last night’s adventure. I didn’t think his eyes could get bigger than they already were but with each part of the story they grow wider.

“As if you know every single pub in London,” I roll my eyes at my best friend.

“If the pub was lit at 1am it must be popular enough-I would know. Where does this guy live?”

“I...” I try to remember the route we took back to my flat but it’s foggy. Maybe I was too preoccupied with getting over being rejected multiple times. But I do remember we arrived at my flat within half hour. “Right outside London but I wasn’t really paying attention.”

“Doesn’t sound like you,” Jeremy nudges me. “Does somebody have a new special somebody in their life already?”

“I wish!” I really did. “He was mostly distant, nothing happened! He didn’t even let me kiss him goodbye. Plus, I just broke up with you know who.”

“We all knew that chapter was coming to a close,” Jer huffs. “You weren’t even in love with him.”

“Well,” I don’t have much to say to that. Jeremy was right, the relationship was getting colder. And after a warm bath and a meal, I could see clear enough. I was angry yesterday for letting it get to the point I was cheated on. I never had the balls to end it myself. As strong as I made myself on the outside, I hadn’t been strong enough inside to admit it and just end it.

Mostly I was scared to be alone again.

“Well,” Jeremy pulls me into a hug and kisses my forehead. “I’m going to start some dinner for us. You can go through the mail that’s been piling up for you.”

I reach for the stack he drops down beside me. Most of the bills I paid online, I put those aside. Junk, pamphlets, which just left two to actually look at. The first is a postcard from my foster sister, she was doing her gap year and made sure to send me a postcard from each country even though I’d seen her while I was away. The other is unmarked, thin. I open it and inside is just a note.

The Good Folk, tonight. 10:30pm.

Did Harry send this? I flip the paper over but it’s blank, until it catches the light and I realize the faint shimmer of a logo. It’s a spiral in the palest silver but there’s nothing else written anywhere. Maybe Harry did send it, he didn’t have my number but he did know where I lived. Maybe I was seeing him again tonight, maybe Jer was right. Butterflies take over my nervous system but I tell them not to get their hopes up. They don’t listen.

“What are you grinning at?” Jeremy calls from the kitchen—the open concept allowed him to see me.

“I might have a date tonight, half past ten,” I hold up the paper. “Harry.”

“Ooh,” he grins before it morphs into concern. “That’s late...you don’t think?”

“We’ll see,” I skim my fingers over the writing. Maybe he just wanted to talk, but if a guy wanted to see you twice in a day that usually meant something right? Even though he looked afraid everytime I went in for a kiss. I sigh. We’ll see.

***

I look back at the shops around me. I swear this was where I was last night. But the place where The Good Folk should have stood was just a Gregg’s. A Google search didn’t turn up anything so all I had to rely on was memory and even that was shoddy.

I ask a couple passing by but nobody knows what I’m talking about. Great, Harry would probably think I stood him up.

I decide to wander, maybe I’ll stumble on it again. I don’t even try to think, hoping my memory will lead me. The dark streets remind me of my near meltdown last night. It was late, if I didn’t find it in the next five minutes I was driving back.

Just as I think it, I see a familiar sign. The Good Folk. But it’s on a street corner and it was most definitely not on a corner last night. Definitely weird.

When I walk in, it’s past 10:30 and I hope Harry wouldn’t mind. I walk to the bar, even more people staring tonight than last. I definitely didn’t look how I did last night, was it just because I wasn’t a regular?

“Surprised you’re back,” the barkeep actually acknowledges me today. He has a petite woman working the counter too.

“Just meeting someone,” I say. Harry was nowhere to be seen. Maybe he was late too.

“A woman like you should be careful,” he sets a drink in front of me.

“I didn’t order th-“

“I did,” a soft voice says to my left. I look at the source, and am surprised to see a blonde guy who definitely was not Harry. He did look familiar. Then I remember, I saw him last night.

“I know you. You were here yesterday-or rather this morning right?” He has kind eyes when he smiles at my question.

“Yes, I saw you come and go. I never got the chance to speak with you.”

I take a seat, may as well while I waited. As I do I remember more; he was glaring at Harry when we left. “Now’s your chance!” I smile at him and take a sip. “Woah, this is amazing.”

“I thought you might like it,” he watches me drink more. I wasn’t even halfway through and I already wanted a second. “Wild elderberry cocktail.”

“I have to remember that,” I say and make a mental note as I gulp down more.

“I never caught your name...”

“Oh, I didn’t even introduce myself how rude of-“

“Rose,” my back straightens as Harry’s familiar voice rings across the bar. What was up with him interrupting my conversations here?

“Rose,” the blonde nods, ignoring the fact that Harry had answered his question. I open my mouth to correct him, to give my real name but he gives me his. “Elliot.”

I can’t even respond because Harry suddenly crowds me. There’s a fiery heat emanating from him towards Elliot. Maybe there was something between them, and the way they glare at each other, I don’t want to find out.

“Took you long enough,” I tell Harry. But the pub is so silent you can hear a pin drop. I look around and everyone is staring at us, this must be one of those places where everyone knew everyone else. And the vibes were telling me these two must have a history.

“What are you talking about?” Harry asks. “Why are you here?”

“Um, you invited me? The letter?”

“What letter,” he finally tears his eyes from Elliot and he looks fierce. My stomach drops and my eyes sting. I was such an idiot, of course he didn’t send it. Why was I so obsessed with the idea that I could mean something to this man I just met. Why was I acting like a hormonal teenager about this!?

“I got a letter to be here at 10:30...I just thought it was you I-“

“It was me,” Elliot interrupts. I look to him, his face is a breath of fresh air compared to Harry’s fiery storm.

“How did you know where I lived?” I ask but it doesn’t matter because Harry’s put his body between Elliot and I.

“You stay out of this. Leave her alone.” Harry’s words are threatening.

“She’s not yours,” Elliot says lazily. “She came of her own free will.”

“Free will? She came on an invite. By you.”

“An invite is just that. Her choice.”

“Stay away toadstool, if you touch a single-“

“Hey!” I use my hands to pry them apart. “I’m sitting right here! And I don’t need a knight in shining bloody armour. You,” I turn to Harry. “Don’t need to worry about me. It’s not like you want me. Elliot invited me out, I’m here for him. Not you.”

If I thought it was silent before, it was void of even a breath now. Harry looks like steam could be coming out of him and just like a switch, he backs away and straightens out. His face falls into neutral as he nods.

“As you wish.” He turns, with a last cold look at Elliot, he walks out. Everyone watches him go and as soon as he does there’s a burst of excited chatter.

“What was that about,” I turn to Elliot.

“The past.” He says vaguely before ordering me a second drink. I didn’t even realise I stress drank the first one.

The bartender eyes me as he hands me over the drink.

“Thanks,” I slide it closer to me.

“Remember what I said,” he mumbles as he glances at Elliot and walks away. Did everyone have something against Elliot? But when I look at him he looks too sweet to have ever done something bad enough to hold a grudge. Everything but his eyes, there’s an icy glint to them that wasn’t there before Harry interrupted. The past must be something formidable.

“Let’s go to my table,” Elliot gestures to where he was sitting yesterday. I follow with mixed feelings. Eventually, I decide I was just here for fun. It wasn’t that serious.

***

Dawn creeps on the horizon, and I’m surprised to see it as Elliot helps me into my coat.

“How has it been hours?” I ask as I slip my hands in. “We’ve been talking for so long!”

“I guess so,” Elliot lets go of the jacket and I untuck my hair from underneath. Tonight was...so different than any I’ve ever had. Elliot and I had just talked all night, I barely remember about what. He was funny too. And The Good Folk stayed open with people in and out all night. “It was nice to get to know you.”

“This place is busy as ever, does it ever close?” I glance at the patrons. Some of them don’t even hide their open stare. I was starting to get used to it.

“Closes at sunrise.” Elliot stares.

“Sunrise? It must open late then. That’s an odd schedule.” I think about what Jer said. A place like this would be infamous in London, why had nobody heard of it?

“It’s open sunset to sunrise.”

“Interesting.” I follow Elliot out into the street. The sky is brightening, the midnight black turning into a deep sea blue.

“This is where we part ways Rose.” He says Rose like an enchantment, and my body wants to move closer but I stay where I am. He continues studying me the way he had been all night. I had been studying him too.

“It was really nice. Tonight.”

“I enjoyed myself. Despite the nuisance from early on.”

“Nuisance?” I ask. “Oh. Harry?”

“Harry,” his lip curls. The boyish sweetness bitters before washing away again. “Don’t mind him.”

“Oh I don’t. He helped me out in a pinch yesterday but otherwise I barely know him.”

“In a…pinch?”

“Yeah. It was pretty bad but,” I shrug. “Anyway. I should get home. My friend might start to worry.”

“Of course Rose,” Elliot says. He eyes me for a moment. His brow tightens and he continues, “Maybe I’ll see you again?”

“Maybe,” my heart picks up its pace. “We’ll see.”

His smile stretches his lips, he seemed amused.

With a nod he walks away and turns the corner. I stand there even after I’m unable to see him, and smile into my scarf. I just had an all nighter date with a cute guy who seemed interested in me.

When I tell Jer this he just scoffs.

“Be careful,” he reminds me. “Firstly I’ve never heard of this bar. Secondly how the fuck did this Elliot guy get your address? And thirdly, you don’t get involved with two guys with history. Trust me.”

“Jer,” I roll my eyes. “Okay. The address thing is weird, maybe I said it out loud when I was trying to get a ride home?”

“Still creepy! Hold on-“ he picks up his ringing phone and I wait.

Aside from the address thing, sure. It was a big weird. But Elliot did not give off creepy vibes. I just had to do some more digging if I was interested.

Was I interested? I think of Elliot’s amused blue eyes and blonde hair, his laugh, and the way he made most of the night about me. He didn’t try to kiss me or take me home. We just talked. It was nice.

My mind wanders to Harry. He had taken me home, taken care of everything. Was respectful. But he was kind of overprotective, and aloof. I didn’t care for that.

Elliot was open whereas Harry was hard to read-

“Are you even listening,” Jeremy snaps his fingers in front of my face.

“Huh?” I look up and in the time I had gotten lost in my thoughts, Jeremy had changed into his parka and his boyfriend stands beside him ready to leave.

“Y/N get some rest. I’m worried about you. You can’t just go from one relationship—even if it was a dying one, and hop into a love triangle.”

“Love triangles are messy,” Bryce comments.

“I know! Promise me you’ll take a break. Process your last relationship before you jump into anything new?”

He was right. Of course he was. It had just been such a long time since I felt wanted that I was letting it fuck me up like I was a teen madly in love. I barely knew them. And I’d forgotten all about my cheating ex. On one hand it was good, but I couldn’t slide into anything new.

“Okay. Promise.”

“Good.” Jer sighs. “We’ll be out of your hair by tonight so don’t make me worry about you.”

“What? Why? You two stay the week like I promised!”

“No we need to head back north. He misses the countryside,” Jer points back to his partner.

“The cow shite can wait Bryce, please? Keep me company longer?!”

Jer hugs me against him. “We’ll do lunch today before we’re off okay? Get some sleep though.”

I’ve known Jeremy since I was 11 and he was 10. I had just been placed in a new foster home, the third one I’d been in since I was 6. Jeremy had arrived a month before me, he’d been in the system since he was 9. He had given me the downlow on who to avoid and who was nice, in return I’d stuck up for him when he was picked on. He was a tiny thing then, scrawny and wide-eyed. I had been weathered by the system and didn’t care who was nice and who you had to avoid. I learned after my first home you had to become the person to avoid, and then leave everyone else alone.

We were separated a few years later and found each other on the streets when I was 17 and he was 16. When I turned 18, saved enough money to rent a shitty flat with another girl, I let him crash with me until he could afford his own rent.

We always looked out for each other. He was one of 3 people I considered family. So when he gives me advice, I take it.

***

“No I’m telling you she works at Boots and she complimented my eyeliner.” Jer bangs the table. We’re sat at lunch, a couple day drinks in. “I was like bitch you spat on me when we were 12 and called me ten different kind of slurs!”

“Shut up!” I cover my mouth. “I need to see it for myself.”

“Tomorrow. Visit her. I wonder if she’ll recognize you.”

“Probably not. I look pretty different.” These days I dyed my hair a triage of browns and blondes and grew out of my baby face.

“True. She might compliment your hair.”

“She better not. She used to make fun of how frizzy it got-“

“Until you woke her up with scissors over her hair one night.”

“Shh,” I laugh. “Don’t say my crazy so publicly.”

“It’s not your crazy,” Jer grabs my hand. “It’s what kept you alive. Us.”

We grow quiet as the heavier bits of the memories sink in.

“It was tiring,” I slip my hand away. “Always being switched on. Even now, I can’t help it.”

“Until it comes to men. Then my good friend y/n goes poof and this stranger appears.”

I sigh, I had issues. “I can’t help being fucked up. It’s just like, when I sense they want me something inside me lights up. And I tell myself to calm down but all rational thought disappears!”

“Girl trust me I get it. Until I met Bryce, I was sharing beds with so many people.”

“I remember.” Back then it was me picking him up from random parts of town after being kicked out by a spouse home too early, or a partner back from out of town.

“What’s that bloke’s name? Harry was it? He didn’t want you-“

“Ouch! I know!”

“No not like that!” Jer says. “You seemed into him the first night you came back. Even though he wasn’t into you.”

“Yeah. Maybe just cuz he was nice. Why is finding love so hard? I feel like I’m not cut out for it!”

“You want a love that transcends everything because you read too much romance.”

“Stop being dramatic,” I roll my eyes. But it was true, romance novels were my vice. I couldn’t help but believe in true love.

The one thing I knew about my parents is that my mum died in childbirth and my dad died when I was 3 from heartbreak. He loved her more than he could love the sum of the two of them. He left me behind for her. That was true love.

I had a whole of 2 pictures from my life. One of my mum pregnant with me. Another of my mum and dad before they got pregnant I think. The way they looked at each other—I just want a slice of that. I always believed true love existed simply because I knew the story of my parents.

“Okay. Bryce is texting me nonstop let me see what he wants.” Jer leaves me at the table. I sigh and sip my wine, wishing I wasn’t such a hopeless romantic.

It was the part of me that always got hurt. Every other part I had learned to grow armour on but the part of me that yearned never learned how to.

My chest aches as I think about the love I don’t have. I feel it in the air around me as it quivers with something that feels akin to mourning.

“What are you doing?” I hear from the table next to me. There was a couple seated after us, Jer and I guessed they were colleagues. It was a game we liked to play—guessing the lives of people around us. We’d done it as long as we could remember.

The woman slides her hand up the man’s arm. He’s the one that asked the question. He doesn’t seem into it.

“Sorry,” Jer says, sitting back down just as the woman jerks back.

“I uh-“ she pushes her chair back. “Sorry I don’t know what-“

“Uh oh,” I look at Jer. “They just blurred some coworker lines.”

“No it’s okay. Mags wait-“ the guy manages to her back in her seat and they talk too low to hear.

“Juicy,” we eye them for a few seconds.

“Bryce is picking me up in 15, we need to start heading back otherwise we’ll be driving in traffic.”

“I wish you stayed the week.” I pout.

“Your 1.5 bedroom flat isn’t big enough for all of us. Call me when you finally get that promotion and buy a bigger flat.”

“You’ll be the first person I call. You know that.”

“I know that.” He smiles.

“When will you be in town next?”

“Not for a while unless my best friend decides to do something stupid.”

“I won’t,” I promise him. “Maybe I’ll come up to you in November.”

“Open invitation.” Jer reminds me.

I go home to an emptier flat, it makes me feel more lonely than I should. I never had a lot of people in my life, I’d grown accustomed to being alone. To loneliness.

But as an adult, the pangs dug in just as deep.

I soothe it by falling asleep early.

All I remember of my dreams are intense colours and emotions, vibrant landscapes and a looming sense of dread. I wake up drenched in sweat, the second time that week that my dreams were that intense. Maybe I should be visiting a doctor.

***

I feel like I’m wasting potential as I sit in my flat on a Friday night. I had been laying on my couch for the last two hours, first scrolling through my phone, then being jumpscared by a post from my ex, then zoning out to a movie, before going back on my phone.

The cycle is vicious. And all I can think of is Elliot. No. I couldn’t think of Elliot.

Maybe I should join one of those dating apps. Hopeless romantic looking for true love, but also dtf to fill the time.

God. I was miserable.

Something inside me is drawn to go back to the pub. To the patrons that loved to stare. To the pair of eyes I didn’t mind stared.

“Jer said no.” I say out loud. Well, he didn’t say no. Just not to do anything rash. To process my emotions. “Fine.”

I continue laying on my couch. Let my ex flit through my mind. I thought I loved him. I think I just liked the idea of him. After the initial lover phase, we were really in two different places all the time.

I sink deeper into the couch. Who have I loved? Have I ever lover anyone romantically?

I remember a guy I dated when I was 24. It lasted 8 months and 14 days. Jer had had to sleep on the couch for a week because the day I was broken up with I’d found my way to his flat, crashed on his bed, and stayed glued onto his mattress.

Until he had to physically carry me into a shower and spray me with water. But that’s another story.

He was the closes thing I felt to love. To loved. He moved to Mexico. I remember he told me it was wrong timing. I remember thinking I was cursed.

I sink further and further into the couch.

I was 28 and never really loved anyone. How pathetic was that?

Suddenly I can’t breathe. It feels like the couch was drowning me whole like quicksand.

Even pulling myself out feels like quicksand, I use all my strength to sit up and only then do my lungs inflate with a deep breath.

“Holy fuck.” I gasp.

What the fuck was that!?

I look back at my couch but it looks back the exact same. It felt like it was swallowing me moment earlier. What the fuck!

I had to get out of here.

That’s how I find myself at the local corner store buying junk, and browsing the crisps.

“Sweet tooth?”

“Huh?” I nearly jump at the sight of Elliot. “Wha-Elliot?”

“Rose.”

“What are you…are you stalking me?”

“Stalking?”

“What are you doing here?”

He tucks his hands in his pockets, that’s when I note how casual he was dressed. Slacks and a half-zip.

“I was at a party nearby,” his eyes flicker over the items in my hand.

“Weird coincidence.” He knew my address, I knew that.

“It might appear that way. What are you doing now?”

“Um…” I glance down at my hands. “Buying…stuff.”

“Want to join us? The party’s by the water.”

If it was a fake party he wouldn’t be inviting me. Unless he was going to take me to a second location to do something worse.

“I’m busy so…”

“Oh. My apologies.” He gets formal very quickly but his eyes crinkle with a smile, the blueish grey drawing me in. “I’ll let you get on.”

“Well,” he wasn’t pushy. Maybe I should see this party. See the people he hung out with. “Maybe I can drop by for a little bit? It’s nearby?”

“10 minute by walking.”

“I don’t need this then,” I pool my items onto a random shelf. “We can go when you want.”

He goes to the front with his items and at the last second I buy a pack of cigarettes. I tried to drop the habit many times but ever since I got back from my vacation I’d picked it up again. I tried not to blame my ex.

“Those aren’t very good for you.” Elliot eyes the pack as I slip them into my pocket.

“You’re telling me you’ve never smoked a cigarette in your life?”

“I have. It doesn’t taste very good.”

“I don’t think they’re supposed to taste good,” I can’t help but laugh.

“So what are they good for?” He asks and it’s so bizarre because he seemed genuinely curious about it.

“Um? Stress relief? Comfort?”

“Sounds like something a lover should offer.”

I nearly walk into traffic when he says it. So bluntly. Kind of like how Harry spoke. I wonder if they just grew up so rich they were from another world.

“Sure if you have one. Lovers are fleeting and temporary. Cigarettes—they’re permanent. Until I guess…you fuck your lungs up so much you become fleeting and temporary. Shit sorry.”

Elliot looks at me with confusion, like I was speaking an alien language. Maybe he didn’t get the joke. I dunno. I grow quiet instead.

“So what exactly is it you do?” I ask after a bout of silence. I can’t remember if he’s told me this in our conversation the other night.

“What do you mean I do?”

“Like in life? To earn money and all that?”

“In life? I lead.”

I glance up at him after the douchey answer. Oh he was serious.

“Cool so you’re like, upper management at your company or like you own the business?”

He cocks his head, “I manage my company yes. But I don’t own anything yet. I report to someone above me.”

“Right.” He was being very literal. And it sounded like nepotism. I didn’t want the headache of knowing what his company did so I don’t bother with more questions.

He leads me down a set of steps and to the canal. People sit along the grassy bank and I’m a bit surprised to see them.

“Elliot my man!” Someone shouts. “Did you bring the beer?”

Elliot holds up a hand holding two cases. I think back, I don’t remember him buying two. But I could have been too busy checking out his backside. I needed help.

“So Rose,” Elliot says after handing the drinks over. “I would like to see you again. Talk some more. Maybe come clean about all this.”

“All what?” I ask.

“The truth of your parents, how you came to The Good Folk-“

“My parents?” What did he know about my parents?

“Yes. You spoke about them the other night.”

“I did?” I blink to clear the cobwebs but I have a hard time recalling exactly what Elliot and I discussed. Mostly just that it was a nice time.

“Rose,” Elliot gets out in front of me and places a hand on my shoulder. His eyes are intense as they bore into me. “I’m not a threat. I was only curious.”

What a weird fucking thing to say.

I pull my cigarettes out. “I need a smoke.”

“Need?” He lets go of my shoulder, eyebrow raised. “Is it all consuming?”

“Sure?” I just needed to step away. There were too many people around for this not to be safe but I wanted space from Elliot. He was being weird.

“Understood.” He backs away. “I’ll wait until the need is satisfied.”

“Thanks?” I mutter. I step away and as soon as I do at least 3 women replace me and tug at him to join their group. His eyes linger on mine as he walks away with them and I look away.

I move further away from the group, closer to the underpass of a small bridge.

I take out a cigarette and place it in my mouth before I pat my pockets, and realize I had no lighter.

Shite.

I note a few people sitting around, a bright dot hovering around their faces. People had lighters. I could ask one of them.

But the more I look at everyone, the more I want to stay in the shadows. What was I doing here? Jer would kill me if he found out. Maybe I should text him. No, he’d freak out. Fuck!

I lean against the stone wall, pressing my lips against the cigarette still dangling in my mouth. The paper glides smoothly between my lips, the familiar smell of tobacco drifting up to my nose.

The air around me grows cooler and I close my eyes, tilting my head back. Trying to ground myself. The stone is uneven behind my head but it doesn’t matter. I feel cloaked in the dark, embraced by it. I feel safe.

I take a few deep breaths, the joint between my lips a prop for the time being.

As my body relaxes and my mind wanders, Harry’s face materializes before me; if I wasn’t so relaxed it might have scared me.

His green eyes search mine like they’d done before. He leans in closer, the darkness surrounding him. The only light comes from a smoke between his own lips. It throws shadows on his cheekbones, making him look like he was carved from marble.

We’re locked in a staring contest but it doesn’t feel weird. He’s part of the darkness, staring into his eyes keeps me grounded.

He leans down, closer to me. The orange tip of his cigarette touches mine and I can even feel the heat of it, smell the smoky air around us.

I inhale slowly, its an intimate gesture—him giving me light. My smoke catches fire and he leans away with a small smirk, away until the darkness swallows him and I’m alone again.

I take in a deep breath to sigh but smoke shoots down my throat.

I throw my eyes wide open as I cough. The cigarette goes flying out of my mouth and my eyes water.

“What the fuck?” I cough out uncontrollably.

My cigarette lies on the ground in front of me, dying embers on its tip.

What. I crouch down and it really is mine. How could that be?

I hold it to my lips and inhale. Exhale.

It was lit.

I whip my head around, was Harry here? Did I not imagine that?

But the closest person is making out with someone else on the other side of the bridge. No one had been here. Unless they’d lit it while I had my eyes closed and walked away.

A chill goes up my spine.

I had to go home. This was getting weird.

When I tell Elliot I was going to go home he’s flanked by half a dozen girls. They look at me with disdain but I ignore it. I was used to looks like that.

“You had your cigarette?” Elliot asks.

“Yeah. Oh. Sorry I didn’t offer one. Did you want-“

“That’s not my smoking preference,” he smiles and he’s the man in the pub again. Kind eyes and an infectious smile. “Meet me at the pub one of these nights Rose?”

“I can’t promise anything,” I play with the pack in my pocket, eager to leave.

“I don’t expect you to,” Elliot says seriously.

“Okay. Well. I’ll try to make it.”

“Great.”

I leave behind a weary smile and hitch it back home.

***

I wake up again drenched in sweat. This whole week I’d been having intense dreams, but all I remember when I wake up is how chaotic it was. The rest slips away like sand in the breeze. It’s frustrating because they feel similar, like I should be remembering what they’re saying.

“Have you been smoking pot?” Lydia asks. I’m back at work that Monday and I’m detailing to my friend who’s serving me my coffee.

Lydia and I met in uni when we were 19. Like all people, I’d been wary and guarded with her back then. But she’d been persistent and earned my trust somehow. We’d been best friends since. I’d watched her come up with and execute this idea of owning her own cafe all on her own. It was London’s top 5 book cafes. And even though it was out of my way I tried to come here most days for coffee.

“No, but it’s making me sleep so shitty.” I complain. “I wish I could just pop a nyquil and call it quits for the night.”

“I can hook you up with magnesium? It’s supposed to be superb.”

I grab my cup from her, “I’ll get super drunk tonight. Blackout for free.”

“Not alone,” she comes around the counter and hugs me. “You were mia this last week. I’m coming over with wine tonight and you catch me up on it.”

I sigh and agree. It would be a lot to cover.

The work day is lost in the bustle of catching up and meetings. By the time I see Lydia again I feel like someone could tip me over and I’d crash. But after putting on some face masks and pouring a generous helping of wine I settle in and tell her all about it.

“So mysterious,” she says when I’m done. Obviously I leave out the weird parts, like the pub moving physically and having my cig light up on its own because I’m not even entirely sure it happened. “The Harry guy seems like a gentleman. The other bloke seems a bit too coincidental to not be creepy.”

“But Harry was being so possessive.”

“Pink flag?” Lydia asks.

“Maybe. Jer said to stay away from it all. Honestly I need a man break? I think after my last relationship I just need to be alone again. I’ve been trying to fill the hole of loneliness with who I can date next. It’s gross.”

“It’s not gross,” she nudges me. “It’s human. Wanting connection.”

“Yeah,” I think on it. “I guess it is. Lord knows I didn’t get enough of it as a child.”

“There you go. We can’t help it. But maybe I agree with Jer? Lay off the relationships. Doesn’t mean you can’t do the horizontal mambo with whoever you want.”

“Dee!” I laugh. “Why do you have the worst names.”

She smirks behind her wine glass, probably considering it a win for making me laugh.

She stops herself early since she had to get back home and I carry the remains of the bottle to bed. Wine made me sleepy and just the same I knock out shortly after. And I don’t wake with a fright the next morning but as my dreams drift away I know they were crazy. This time I remember something about sticks. Random but I remember.

As I ride the tube to work I try to keep a reign on my hangover. I’d had plenty of water last night and popped some painkillers this morning yet my vision is blurry and everyone looks hazy around the edges.

I look to the woman sitting in front of me. She looked pleasant enough but there’s a ring of gray around her that bleeds into the pink of a little boy sitting next to her. His feet don’t quite hit the ground and they swish back and forth. It’s mesmerizing actually and I nearly miss my stop.

You’d think it gets better but the haziness stays the whole day. I should book an eye doctor too, I think somewhere in my brain. Whatever Lydia brought over last night was strong.

On Friday night Lydia invites me over to her place. She had a few friends over that was part of her couple group—her and partner Damon. And I hung out with them occasionally. With not much else to do I join them.

The week had been taxing and I’d had random bursts of feeling off throughout but I never got sick. Googling anything just told me I should rest, that I should expect a migraine after seeing these bursts of colours, that maybe I had a tumour. But nothing pans out.

“Ouch,” Damon says when he opens the door to me.

“That’s rude.” I shove the bottle I brought in his chest and move past him. I hear Lydia humming in her room and head straight to it.

“Something fucked up happened in the flat nex-“ She gasps when she sees me. “Y/N! Love are you alright!?”

“I’m fine—no I’m not. I think I’m going mad. Like proper mad.”

“No sit. Sit!” She pats her bed and kneels in front of me. “Damo can you get Y/N some water!?”

“Sorry. I wasn’t going to show. But I thought sitting in my flat would be worse-“

“Are you sick?” She lays a hand on my forehead. “Your temp’s alright.”

“I’m not sick! The doctor’s won’t prescribe me anything because I’m not anything! I’ve just had the shittiest sleep of my life the last week, I keep getting these weird migraine symptoms without the migraines, and I keep thinking I see something in the corner of my eye and I don’t! Nothing’s there!”

That was something that was new yesterday. Shapes moving around me but when I look everything is normal and still.

“Fuck!” Damon walks into the room just as the glass he’s holding breaks. “What the-“

“Nobody move!” Lydia screeches and I am so on edge I nearly scream at her to quiet down. “Damon what the actual fuck!?”

“I don’t know! I didn’t drop it it literally combusted in my hand.”

“You were probably squeezing it!” Dee accuses him.

“It was probably after getting one look at her,” Damon points to me. I flip him off and lay back onto the bed. I couldn’t even offer any help to pick up the glass.

I take a deep breath in, and out. In. And out.

I drift off, I imagine myself in the clouds, drifting through the air. I imagine a clean gust of air flowing into my lungs. And then out.

When I finally come back to reality Damo is emptying the glass into the bin and Lydia is dragging a wet rag across the floor.

“I’m sorry,” I sit up. “I should help.”

“No.” Damon holds his hand up at the same time Lydia does. “Just go to sleep if you need it. Just don’t worry about this. Or the party. Seriously y/n.”

“Yeah,” Dee puts her hands on her hips. “We’re worried about you. Just take it easy.”

“I feel a bit better. I just needed a moment. Riding the tube had been sensory overload lately.”

“Stay in our guest bed tonight,” Dee offers, glancing at Damon who nods. “Change of scenery.”

As Lydia’s friends arrive I take my spot amongst them. I engage in light catching up, I wasn’t against socializing but tonight I mostly listen.

I try to ignore the way the room changes around the people who talk. Sometimes it feels comforting and orange and other times the temperature drops and it feels like everything is metallic. It sounded mental but that’s how it felt.

The more I drink the more the colours come back.

Lydia’s is like a sunset and as the night goes on it deepens. Damon’s is like Christmas lights, red bleeding into a deep green.

A few friends have similar colours, others complement each other’s. I wonder for a brief moment if anything I ate had pot but nobody says anything.

As the company loosens, I step outside for a smoke.

Halfway through one, I hear the door open behind me and close.

“Doing that again?”

I turn to the familiar face. Sean, I’d known him since final year at uni. We’d been casual friends but with him being Damon’s brother we interacted frequently enough it was more than casual with how much we knew about each other but we weren’t friends enough to ever hang out alone. He’s actually how Damon and Dee met.

“I’m gonna stop.”

“Like always.”

“If you followed me out here to judge me I’m good.”

“I didn’t. I just got here and I saw you alone outside.” He walks up next to me. He brings with him warmth and even though it’s not too cold outside I can’t help but savour it.

“You got here late.” I comment. “You want one?”

“I quit last year y/n.” He reminds me.

“So did I,” I say wryly. He cracks a smile, it’s toothy. The same smile he’s always had.

“One of my friends had a kid a few weeks ago. I was dropping some food off, ended up staying too long.”

“Wow. A kid huh?” I knew people my age—hell, people younger than me, were settled with children. I just couldn’t imagine it.

“Yeah.” He blows air out of his cheeks. “When he first told me he was pregnant I actually said What are you gonna do?!”

“Oh shit,” I look at him. “Was he upset?”

“He thought it was funny,” he glances back to me. “I forget we’re closer to 30 than 20 these days.”

“Tell me about it.”

Sean brushes his hair back, he tended to grow it out and then surprise everyone and shave it every so often. I wondered when the next surprise would be.

The longer I look at him the more his edges light up. It’s a deep blue, it blends into the night but when he steps back against the balcony doors it’s easier to see. It spreads outwards into a purple.

Sean glances back into the house and back to me.

“Are you thinking it’ll be those two next?”

“Huh?” I realize it looks like I was looking inside rather than around him. “Oh. Those two? Maybe not next but soon.”

“She keeps pushing the wedding date. Settling on one I mean.” Sean says. I raise my brow and he explains. “My brother told me. What’s up with that?”

A ripple of something flows through me. It aches a little. I step back to a chair and sit down.

I think about everything I knew about Lydia. I knew why. We all had childhood problems—her mum was trapped in her relationship with Dee’s dad and the Lydia I knew told me she would never sign a contract to keep a relationship. It had surprised the hell out of me when she said yes a couple years ago. But I guess she was now coming around to realizing she would have to give up the one thing she swore she’d never do.

“Damon probably knows about Dee’s parents,” I say. “Maybe tell him to jog his brain a little. Put the pieces together.”

Sean chokes out a laugh. “Okay. Whatever that means. Hey what about you? What happened to office guy?”

“That’s over,” I say.

“Shit. I’m gonna grab a drink first. Then I want to hear about it.”

“There’s nothing to…” Sean’s gone before he can hear me out. I sigh. I came out here to be alone.

I look out to the view, I would never get tired of this city. Its streets ran through me like my veins. I loved it here.

I can see the train going past and I think of the people on it. People with so many different colours.

I hear sniffling and look to the door but Sean’s still not back.

I turn to the divider behind me. It sounded like it was coming from there. I inch back and it’s distinct. Someone on the other side of this balcony was crying.

“Hello?” I call out. But they don’t respond. Oh god, what was neighbourly etiquette? Do i acknowledge it or ignore it?

Wait. I wasn’t even a neighbour here.

I walk to the edge and lean over so I can get a look into the balcony. I was right. A woman with cropped hair and a pantsuit on cries into her hand.

“Hey, sorry I don’t mean to intrude but-“

I gasp when she looks up at me. So does she. Her eyes are pools of black. Or it looks that way in the light. She swivels her head behind her but there’s nobody there. She looks back to me and points to herself.

“Yeah! You!” I laugh. “What’s wrong? Are you alright? Are you safe?”

“I-“ she takes a step back. “Who-“

“I don’t live here. Sorry i know I’m being nosey,” I let her know. “I just heard you crying and-“

“I’m not okay,” the woman has a thick accent. It sound Baltic. “How do you see me?”

“Uhh,” I try to make sense of her question and answer, hoping I didn’t lose it in her translation. “You look sad. You’re crying obviously you’re sad I just-“

“I don’t know what to do,” she whispers.

“What do you mean?”

“I stay here or I move on. I’m scared.”

“Oh. Move on like move out? Where are you moving?”

She shrugs. “I don’t know

“Well where are the people you love? Who love you?” I always imagined leaving this city, this country. Build a life far away. But every time it came back to being close to the few I loved or not. And every time I chose them.

“Here.” She sniffles. “In the end I wanted to stay.”

“If it matters to you, I’d vote stay. But I also don’t know your life so-“

“Y/n?”

“Huh?” I whip my head to the sound of my name. Sean closes the door behind him, two beers in hand, concern etched into his face.

“Are you…talking to someone?”

“Oh yeah,” I whisper. “The woman there seemed upset.”

I lean over again to apologize but she’s gone. Damnit.

“Nevermind. She left.”

“Are you fucking with me? There was a woman there?” Sean asks.

“Yeah! I just wanted to make sure she was alright.”

“Huh.”

“What?”

“Didn’t you hear? About next door?”

“What?”

“The woman next door attempted…yknow. To end her life. But since we’re on the second floor it…she’s like, in the hospital now. On life support.”

“What?” My heart sinks. Lydia was saying something fucked up when I walked in. Is that what it was? “Maybe that was her sister crying? Or her lover?”

“No it’s empty. It’s got tape all over it until police clear it.”

My heart sinks even lower. I feel it like a lead weight. Who was the woman I was talking to?

“Anyway tell me about your tragedy,” Sean hands me a beer and I take it, my mind still reeling from the news.

“Um. It’s not really one. The relationship fizzled out.”

“Really? That’s it?”

“Well what about you? Last Christmas I heard you were dating a hot goth?”

“Who said that? Damo?”

“Maybe? So?”

“No! I brought her to a party but it wasn’t serious. And she wasn’t a goth. Just wore all black jeez.”

I laugh and the colours on the edge of Sean melt into pink. It’s a pretty sight even if it’s just in my head.

“I haven’t been all that lucky in love,” Sean sighs. He glances back inside. “But I look at my brother and think if he can find it I can too.”

It makes me laugh. Sean and I have always teamed up to shit on Damo for no other reason than it was fun. I never had siblings growing up and the dynamic, I imagine, felt like one.

“Do you see kids in the future?” He asks out of nowhere.

“Woah. Um. I don’t know. I can’t imagine it honestly, with the childhood I had…”

Sean nods. “I think you’d actually understand exactly what a child would need. I think you’d be good raising a child.”

“Maybe,” I shrug. “I think I’m also going insane so right now it’s a no.”

He chuckles. “Was that part of your insane bit? Talking to a ghost next door?”

When he says the G word a shiver travels down my spine. I remember the stranger seemed surprised I was talking to her.

No. It couldn’t be. I didn’t even believe in ghosts. The police must have lifted the tape. It was her relative or something.

“I think I’m a little drunk.” I change the subject.

“How are you getting home?” Sean asks.

“Might crash here. I…I think I’m actually going inside now.”

“Oh-oh yeah okay,” Sean steps aside so I can walk past him. He was like a human furnace with how warm he was. I leave him outside and head straight to the guest room. I couldn’t stay here. I didn’t want to worry my friends or do something crazy. The woman next door freaked me out too much.

I grab my jacket and purse and sneak out, texting Lydia an apology once I start walking home.

I thought about taking the train but I couldn’t handle the people. If I walked for a half hour there was a bus that was 10 minutes to my flat.

So I walk in the quiet night, interrupted by the occasional car or group of friends. I spot a fox as I walk and keep to my side of the street. I watch the silhouettes of the trees move gently in the light breeze, I watch as squares of light flick on or off as its inhabitants live their lives. I feel apart of it and outside of it.

I’ve always viewed the world this. I always feel I was this way—apart of something bigger but also on the periphery. Maybe it was growing up in the foster system, or simply always wearing my armour in order to survive. All I ever wanted was people. People to call all my own. Where I was so deep into something bigger that I never questioned where I stood.

Nearly to the bus stop I hear a familiar tune in the air. My palms go clammy as I follow it. I know where I was going to end up. But I was in a completely different part of town. So it was actually impossible.

And there it is. The Good Folk.

What the fuck was this sorcery.

The cherry on top: standing outside arguing with a woman was Harry.

My feet lead me without a single thought in my head.

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