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fandomsonrequests · 4 years

Text

𝖆𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖍𝖊𝖗 𝖘𝖊𝖑𝖊𝖈𝖙𝖎𝖔𝖓..? [𝖕𝖆𝖗𝖙 1]

fandom: ATEEZ

characters: prince! park seonghwa

reader: fem! knight

word count: 1.7k+

summary: It was time for another Selection. No- not a Selection for a bride but rather a well-trained knight to keep Prince Seonghwa safe after a failed assassination attempt. You, a blacksmith’s daughter, manage to make it to the elite group of knights worthy and skilled enough to protect the crown prince after months and months of training. This alone catches Seonghwa’s eyes- in more ways than one

a/n: so the first part! mind you this is unedited so im sorry if there are any spelling errors or if it sucked. ;^; i’ll try updating every week but please bear with me- class is about to start soon for me :(( Also- I hope you catch the two cameos of two other kpop idols in here ;)

Please message me if you want to be tagged for the future updates! <3

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You were always full of surprises.

You surprised your mother with your first kick in the womb while she was tidying your father’s workbench. You surprised your whole family when you came out of the womb as a girl- not as a boy like a village’s midwife predicted. You surprised your father with the first sword you crafted, showing that the gift of smithing didn’t stop at your older brother.

So it wasn’t unexpected when you expressed your desire to open another smithy in town.

“Now why would you want to do that, my dear?” Your father asked with a gentle smile, wincing at the injury his leg sustained during an accident in the workshop. “Are you not satisfied here with us?”

Your younger self momentarily glanced at his injury, shaking her head before answering him with a hopeful grin. “I am papa. But we will be able to earn more for the future. And you don’t have to tire yourself out in the smithy anymore, papa…” Your voice trailed off at the end, your smaller hands reaching out to hold her father’s.

Your father smiles gently although there was almost a sad glint to it. He raised his calloused hand to your cheek, caressing the skin there softly and pinching it afterward. He laughed quietly when you swat his hand away with a tiny pout on your rosy cheeks.

“My dear, you never fail to brighten up and think of the loved ones surrounding you. For that, I’m grateful.” He grunted as he stood up from his seat, leaning on the cane that was made for him. He gently cupped the back of your head and pulled you forward to kiss the crown of your hair.

“But don’t worry too much about me. I’ll be able to manage.” He flashes you one of his reassuring smiles before limping away to his workbench to continue his work.

You looked over to your father, brows furrowed together as your hands gripped at the apron that hung around your waist. One day- you’d make him proud and he’d never have to suffer again.

Forward to many years later. Here you are now, a young woman of twenty-two, ready to start the day.

You yawned behind your palm, looking over to the window in the corner of the room on the right. There was no light creeping through the cracks on the shutters which was a telltale sign that the sun was still asleep and that the town was still in the early hours of the morning. It wasn’t uncommon for you to wake at this ungodly time of the day. You always had to start early because as soon as the sun rises the whole town comes to life.

Another yawn escapes you as your hand flies across the bedside table, finding the small box of matches and candlestick that you kept. You pull back your hand and hiss quietly as you feel a tiny splinter on your palm. You ignore the pain for the moment and continue searching for the candle and matchbox.

As soon as you find it, you light the candle and make work of removing the splinter in your palm. You set the candle into its respective holder and glanced over to your brother’s side of the room. His back was to you, shoulders going up and down as he breathed steadily. You roll her eyes in half amusement and half exasperation, a quiet sigh escaping you. He always stayed up late.

You get up, bringing the candlestick with you, and proceed to head to the kitchen in your small house. You grab your shawl on the way there as a draft blew through the house. It was always cold where you lived- especially since it was near the mountains- but it was even colder in the mornings.

As you move about the kitchen, you can hear footsteps approaching. “What time did you sleep last night, Christopher?” You ask your brother, not looking up from slicing the hard bread you had.

“Earlier than usual..” He yawns, running his hand through his dark hair. He assisted you in making breakfast, bringing out the earthenware jug of goat’s milk and pouring it into the clay mugs you each have.

“But late as always.” You counter back as you set the slices of bread onto the table. You proceed to return the jug of milk to the cupboard but sigh when you realize how much lighter it was than before. “Looks like we’ll be out of milk soon.”

“Then it’s another week without it,” Christopher adds as he cleans up the crumbs and cuts some slices of goat cheese to go with the bread. “Oh well… we’re used to it anyway. You know how most of what we earn goes to papa’s medicines. Not to forget his ointments.”

“I know Chris, I know.”

You two eat in silence, letting the topic pass by quickly. It’s been a decade since your father had the accident and twelve years since your mother passed from an illness. Since then, it’s just been the three of you. You and your brother worked hard from sunrise till sunset- anything to get your father to rest. You both hated to see how he limped as he walked from one place to the other. You both never told him this but you both saw him sitting on his bed one night, seemingly cursing himself as he stared at the cane he had flung across his room. It pained you to see your father, who usually held his head high, look so defeated.

“I’m off to open the smithy.” You announced as soon as you were done with your meal. “Take care of papa will you, big-nose?”

Christopher nodded, cheeks full of bread and cheese. “See you later stinky-breath”

“It’s just morning breath..!” You refute as you head back to your room to change into your work attire.

After changing into some pants, you threw on your boots and grabbed the worn leather gloves that hung by the doorway. You waved goodbye to your brother and crossed the street to your family’s little smithy.

Few people were already out and about. The delicious smell of fresh bread from the baker’s wafted through the air, thankfully overpowering the nasty odor of goat dung that your neighbors were shoveling out. Probably to be used for the farm they had, or, what little of farmland they had. It was hard to grow things around this area- especially with the altitude and type of soil but the townsfolk managed.

The few shops that were in the village started to open up and the faint sound of the quarry-workers’ song drifted up from the mountain and down into the area, their voices carried by the gentle morning breeze.

“Morning ____!” Magda, your elderly neighbor, greeted as she dusted her carpet from the window.

“Good morning Magda!” You greet back as you head into the smithy. Your boots squelched in the mud created from the dust that floated down from the mountain that mixed with the moist atmosphere created in the early morning.

The smell of heated leather, coal dust, and molten iron greeted your nostrils, burning your lungs with familiarity. You light up the tiny lanterns in the corner of the smithy and your workbench, illuminating the once dark area before grabbing the bucket beside it to fetch some water used in cooling the metal. You hum along to the quarry worker's song, having picked up the tune from having to hear it daily as you work. By the time you were finished with setting everything up, the sun was high in the sky and the town was once more bursting with life.

Your father and brother soon enter, making you smile. “Good morning father.” You greet him with a kiss to his cheek.

“Good morning my flower.” He greets in return as he limps his way over to his workbench.

You tried not to stare after him but you couldn't help it. It seems as if his limp grows worse day by day. You hoped that it the worst will never come- it was a lingering thought but you chose to keep it that way: a what-if scenario. It'll only crush your father's heart if he had to stop crafting and blacksmithing altogether- all because of his injury.

The day continued as usual. The usual customers, both kind and impatient; long lists of requests varying from a specific type of blade and scabbard to the most standard and basic ones. Soon, the sound of a mallet hammering against metal or the hissing of something hot meeting the cool water filled the area. It was practically music to you by now. Time seemed to just flow past the small family of blacksmiths as they worked hard, sweat forming on their brow and skin.

“Careful big-nose,” You tease Christopher when you catch him slipping. You saw how his eyes drooped from his lack of sleep, causing him to trip. Lucky for him- he didn’t drop the mallet he was holding onto his foot.

Lord- he needs to rest.

Chris only laughed dryly and stuck his tongue out at you to which you mirrored quite childishly. Your father only shook his head in amusement, pushing back the spectacles that sat on his nose as he engraved delicate markings into the sheathe a customer ordered a while back.

You were about to throw another playful jab at your brother when the sounds of brass trumpets echoed throughout the village. The people around you grew confused as it continued. There were horns in your village, yes, but this was different. It sounded more regal and official compared to the somewhat brash sound of the village horns.

You threw a rather quizzical look to your brother who shrugged in response. Many of the townsfolk around your area left their place and started moving towards the source of the sound, causing you to do the same. You went over to your father, handing him his cane as you three walked towards the exit of your smithy.

“Oi!! Chris! ____!” A voice called out.

You turn your head to see your friend Siyeon come running towards you. Her steps slowed down to a jog beside you, greeting your father as she did. “What do you think is happening?” She asks you, resting a hand on your shoulder.

“I have no idea.”

#ateez #ateez x reader #ateez fanfiction #ateez fanfic #park seonghwa #park seonghwa x reader #prince park seonghwa #prince seonghwa #ateez royalty au #idol fanfic #fantasy au #ateez oneshot #royal au #regiis #fandomsonrequests #bang chan #christopher chan #siyeon #lee siyeon

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cuddlepilefics · 3 years

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Could you maybe do a GOT7 little space fic please. Where Mark is a little and decides to come out to the others, but right as he's about to do it at the group meeting he slips from the stress of it. The others are confused except for Yugyeom who somehow knows about littles (you can decide how). So Yugyeom takes charge? I really like your fics

Make you cute

Fandom: GOT7

Little: Mark

Caregiver: GOT6 (mainly Yugyeom)

No one’s POV.:

Mark had been a little since he first got into the music business. The kpop industry was a tough environment to grow up in, the pressure and perfectionism never ending. It was only natural that the boy would create himself a safe place, away from the rush that was his everyday life. Years had passed and the rapper had long since debuted, yet he was still a closeted little. Mark used the few occasions that he was left alone at the dorm to regress and feel the stress melt away, if only for a few hours. It wasn’t enough however. His group was almost always around and he couldn’t just lock himself away to color and play with his hot wheels. That’s why he considered telling them about his age regression. They had been a family for years, surely, they’d be openminded enough to at least hear him out, right? The thought of his dongsaengs judging him negatively made his stomach churn anxiously. He was the oldest after all. It would be weird if their oldest acted so much younger than them. Well, it couldn’t be helped. If Mark wanted to prevent breaking from the pressure, he’d need to be little more often and to regress more frequently, his members would have to know about it. Better telling them than having them walk in on something they wouldn’t expect.

He had planned his outing for weeks, trying to find the right occasion because if one of them was stressed or irritated, it was more likely he’d get a negative reaction. Today though, today would be perfect. They had gotten out of the company building early, done with their schedule for the day. All of them were in high spirits, fooling around on the way back to the dorm and grabbing take-out for dinner on the way. Mark decided today would be the day and after dinner, he’d sit everyone down for a deeper conversation. The moment he decided his outing would be today, he suddenly wasn’t so sure about telling the other members at all. He felt anxious and all appetite he had for dinner vanished. They all freshened up at the dorm and while taking a shower, the rapper went over the words he had prepared for the upcoming talk long ago. He had hoped the shower would help him relax but it didn’t really do anything other than clean him. At the beginning of their dinner, he had asked to talk to them later, so none of the members would run off to do their own thing afterwards. That also meant, no getting out of this anymore. It took some effort he actually managed to force a few bites of his meal past the lump in his throat. All the while his leg bounced. The rapper himself wasn’t really aware of it but to their leader it was a telltale sign, that his hyung’s nerves were troubling him. Since the older was obviously struggling with something a bit, he didn’t mention the nervous habit although it was quite annoying.

The hyung-line had quietened down over dinner, feeling the anxiousness radiate of their oldest. They were deep in thought, if Mark was that nervous about telling them something, it must be really bad. The maknae-line, oblivious to the tense atmosphere, was still as loud and chaotic as ever and Mark was thankful for it. If the others were nervous, it would only get tougher for him. He tried eating as slow as possible to delay the talk with his friends as long as somehow possible. What did he get himself into? However, at some point, the table was cleared and Jaebeom was the first to sit down on the couch, motioning for the others to join him.

The two oldest made eye-contact, a silent invitation to start talking. Mark swallowed a few times and cleared his throat in an attempt to get rid of the lump that made it hard for him to speak. It didn’t seem like he could get a word out as six pairs of eyes rested on him, waiting for his revelation. He couldn’t do this. Nope. No, he couldn’t. The rapper’s hands started to tremble and he was fidgeting in his spot. He tried to calm himself with a deep breath but his eyes started to burn before he was overwhelmed by the stress. This wasn’t how he had planned it to go. He wanted to be all confident and able to explain his position and why age regression was a good and healthy thing. Yet here he sat, not able to get a word out. “Hyung, relax. Everything will be fine”, Jackson hummed in a low voice. All of them had toned their playfulness down by now and were getting progressively worried. If they were worried about him, that meant they cared, right? Feeling like somebody cared about him being okay, made Mark feel all soft and fuzzy inside and he couldn’t help but embrace the warmth that promised him safety and comfort.

He completely forgot he wanted to talk about something in the first place and his face relaxed in a matter of seconds. Confused as to why everybody was staring at him, little Markie shifted in his seat uncomfortably. He raised his sweater-paw to his mouth and started to chew on the fabric of his sleeve, in part trying to hide his face from the prodding eyes. To one of the members it seemed to raise suspicions but never would his oldest hyung be a little, right? When Mark let out a frustrated whine because the others were still not looking away, Yugyeom sprang up from his seat announcing: “Let’s go calm down a bit Mark.” He didn’t use any honorifics but also not pet-names in case he was wrong or to not make it weird in front of their clueless friends. The maknae wrapped his arm around the rapper and gently led him back to his room. As soon as the door was shut, the tears started dripping down the little’s face. “Mawkie mess up”, he sniffled, nuzzling his face into Yugyeom’s chest when the taller pulled him into a hug.

The youngest was surprised to find his suspicions to be true because Mark didn’t seem like a person to regress. Yugyeom wasn’t too shocked for long, his caregiver-instincts kicking in and overpowering everything else. He swayed lightly from side to side, holding the rapper tightly and promising everything would be okay. The little clung to him like he was his life depended on it and Yugyeom was for once glad he was so tall. “Markie, is that what you wanted to tell us? That you’re a little?”, he whispered carefully. The shorter nodded his head against the other’s chest before looking up at him with watery eyes: “Hyungie nuh angwy?” – “Now sweetie, why would I be angry?”, the maknae asked, the corners of his mouth curling into a small smile. Mark shrugged, drying his face on his sleeve. “Do you still want to tell them, Markie?” The little nodded, though a bit hesitant. When he looked down at his clothes, he pulled on his shirt, frowning: “Nuh look cute.” – “That’s ok, do you want hyungie to change you into something comfier?”, Yugyeom chuckled and turned to the other’s closet, pulling out a pastel-pink sweater and light-grey shorts.

Though slightly surprised that his friend knew exactly what he’d be comfortable in, Mark changed into the clothes the maknae had laid out for him. Then he pulled out a cardboard box from under his bed and dumped the contents on his bed. He tucked Yugyeom’s hand before pointing at the items covering his bed demanding: “Hyungie choose!” Along toy cars and coloring books, there lay a few cute accessories and the dancer picked out a fluffy cat-ear hairband, slipping it onto the shorter boy’s head and promising: “Hyungie will make you cute.” He also fastened a pastel pacifier-clip on the neckline of the little’s sweater, asking: “You’d be calmer with a paci, right? Which one do you want?” – “Mawkie shy”, the rapper whined, turning bright red. While he covered his flushed face with one hand, the other pointed at his favorite light-blue pacifier with a small black paw-print on it. Cooing, Yugyeom picked said pacifier up and connected it to the clip before also picking up the stuffed puppy and handing it to Mark. “Here, just hold onto him tightly if you feel scared but don’t worry, hyungie will help you tell the others”, the maknae comforted.

Yugyeom shot a quick text to their groupchat, instructing the rest of the group to be openminded. Then he set the little on his hip and made sure he had his pacifier and plushie, so he was all ready to go. When they got back to the living room, Mark hid his face against the maknae’s shoulder. All the eyes looking at him made him shy and uncomfortable. He clutched the puppy tighter like his hyungie had told him to do, while suckling harder on his paci to try and calm down. The other members were utterly confused but Yugyeom raised his index finger to his lips to silence any comments that could stress the rapper further. “So, what mark wanted to tell us was that he is a little also known as age regressor”, the dancer started, “It is a way to deal with stress. Basically, a little creates themselves a safe space inside their mind and their mental age goes back to a time where they didn’t have any worries. In other words, a little is a child and needs to be treated as such.” The others had been listening attentively and being good with kids, Jackson stood up and approached the two. The Chinese put a tentative hand on the little’s back, making him look up. Only now did they notice the pacifier between his lips and Jackson cooed at the innocent eyes blinking up at him.

“Can I hold him?”, Jackson asked and Mark immediately made grabby hands at the other rapper. Yugyeom laughed and handed the little over to Jackson who was over the moon already. The maknae then settled down to answer any questions the others would have about age regression because he figured Mark wasn’t that talkative in his headspace. Jaebeom nodded along with the youngest’s explanations, tapping a finger against his lips as he needed to get a question off of his chest: “How come you know about littlespace, Yuggie?” – “Oh, during highschool I was a caregiver for two of my friends, who were littles”, Yugyeom replied, glancing over at Mark, who happily introduced Jackson to his stuffed puppy. “And what exactly is a caregiver?”, Youngjae frowned. To him it sounded like something only old people needed. “A caregiver is a parental figure or a guide for the littles, keeping them out of trouble, making sure they eat and sleep enough and don’t expose themselves. Most importantly they give cuddles and play with the littles but Jackson-hyung has already figured that out by himself.” – “So, are you his caregiver now, Gyeommie?”, Bambam questioned. The maknae scratched the back off his neck before pointing out: “I only will be if he is comfortable with me being his caregiver. A little can have more than one caregiver though and by the looks of it, Jackson will be taking care of him too. Even all of us could care for him, if you are comfortable with it and he is comfortable with you, why not. He just sees us as his hyungs. That also means: No cursing around the child!” The leader chuckled at his youngest dongsaeng acting all responsible and grown up but he didn’t mind any of it. Their oldest seemed more relaxed in Jackson’s arms than he had been in a while, so this whole regression thing seemed to be good for him. And quite frankly, little Markie was adorable. Who wouldn’t want to take care of him and cuddle him. Youngjae had already called dips on singing the little to sleep, while Jinyoung had gone into full mom-mode, checking the assortment of little gear still spread out on the rapper’s bed and ordering a sippy cup along with cutely designed cutlery online. The group had really taken it better than anyone could have ever expected but on the other hand, Mark was their brother, so why wouldn’t they shower him with the love he deserved?

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euphoricdr3ams · 4 years

Text

1:47 AM

Genre: Angst

Pairing: Jennie x Female Reader

Word Count: 2,472

Part: 1

Something was off. You couldn’t put your finger on it but something had definitely changed. She no longer responded to your messages within minutes. She’d give excuses when you asked to Facetime. She worked late into the night. Your mind raced, trying not to jump to conclusions. Your mind flashed back to all of her affirmations of love.

I love you...

I’ll never leave you…

You’re my soulmate...

You held onto those words, praying that the next time you met that she’d have an explanation for her behavior. The history between you two goes way back. You were her first relationship, her first love. You watched her grow into the headstrong idol she is today.

Though she was busy pursuing her dreams, she always made time for you. She’d cancel on her members and stay up late hours on the phone with you. She’d sneak out to just get boba in the middle of the night. The rare moments where you felt broken she was always there. The times where she couldn’t be she sent all of your favourite things: cookies, stuffed animals and the occasional Tiffany bracelet. You hated when she spent all her money on you but she was insistent on spoiling you and treating you like a princess.

The more you reminisce on the past, the more you realized how beautiful the past three years had been. From what you thought was only going to be one night stand turned into a full three year relationship hidden from the cameras. No one could have predicted you’d both ended up here. When it finally happened, you were both in a state of bliss. A cheesy confession after a passionate session of love making. Could you two get any more stereotypical. You were the first to make the move to something deeper. It took her time but eventually Jennie allowed herself to feel love. After all of the struggle you had been through individually and as a couple, There was nothing that could have broken you apart.

This made Jennie's recent actions over the past few weeks even more odd. You laid on your bed confused. Why the sudden change? The one person who you would turn to wasn’t available yet posted about a new endorsement on Instagram. You slammed your Macbook closed in frustration—a gift she gave you.

“What the fuck?” you screamed as you stared at the ceiling.

“Hey, Let's talk it out now.” You almost forgot you had your friend listening to you on speaker phone nearby. You were so used to just speaking with no one around. “Have you tried to contact her members? What about Nayeon or Yeri?

“They all are being just as shady as she is. But can I really be mad at them? Even if she’s cheating, why would they tell me? They’re her friends before they’re mine anyway...”

You held back tears as you spoke the possibility of your girlfriend cheating into existence.

“Have you tried reaching out to Kai?”

Kim Jongin. Kai. The Dance King of one of the most popular kpop groups ever. He had drop dead gorgeous looks and public approval that you couldn’t compete with. You hated the idea when it was first brought up by YG. your mind thought back to that horrible day.

3 Months Ago

Jennie shuffled in the bed, disrupting the peaceful after-sex nap. She wore you out with all the toys, teasing, and overstimulation earlier.

“Princess,” she purred in your ear. You already knew where this was heading. “I know you’re not sleeping.”

“Well, I’m not now,” you said in your whiny voice. She always liked it when you whined a little.

“Good,” she said. “Come look at me. I have to tell you something.” Slick fingers wrapped around your waist as you shifted under the duvet so you looked her in her eyes. You were greeted with a face full of concern. She looked distressed. Jennie bit her lip in nervousness. She knew what she was about to reveal would be a big blow to your relationship and put it to the test. You saw how hard it was for her to speak.

“It’s okay,” you said, your heart beginning to race. “Take your time.”

“Please don’t freak out.” But it was too late for that; you were already freaking out. “YG thinks it's going to be a good idea for me to get into a scandal.” You continued to listen.”One that allows me to capitalize on internet rumors. They want me to start hanging out with Kai and then it will get revealed that I am dating him around the same time as my solo debut.”

Your eyes widened. “What? Don’t they look at the internet? Why would YOU of ALL idols need to get into a dating scandal? They already dragged your name through the mud after what happened at the Lotte concert. Why would this be a good idea?”

“After seeing the response from Hyuna and Dawn, they thought it would be good for me and Blackpink.” She played with the curls in your hair. “Plus, YG is trying to distract the media from something big that has been rumored to be going on with Big Bang and, you know, he always sacrifices us.”

“Why are you trying to justify this? Jennie, this is a horrible idea. You’re just gonna let him do this to you? What if it backfires? Then what? What about me..?” Your emotions were starting to get the best of you as your voice began to shake. “How am I supposed to feel? You won't even tell your family about us. Now I'm just supposed to be cool while you spend what little free time you have with someone else?”

You were tearing up. You didn't want to pressure her to come out but remaining in hiding was a huge deal for you. Your family all knew. Your friends knew. You wanted to shout to the world your love for her but you kept it secret, all for her sake. Now she was gonna be photographed and used like a tool to make YG richer. You had to let her know how you felt whether she was ready to hear it or not.

You saw her face fall in real time. She already knew you were going to respond like this. There was nothing she could do. She was in a legal binding contract with YG Entertainment. Truth be told they decided all of this without her consent and had already finalized all of the non disclosure agreements before they even told her.

“Y/N, I don't even want to do this at all. I don’t have a choice. I’m just trying to find a silver lining in a dark situation. The “relationship” has an expiration date and, trust me, I won’t leave him for you.” She kissed your forehead and pulled you into her arms. You laid there as she ran her fingers through your hair. You had no choice but to trust her and just pray and hope the situation between you and her would never change.

You were brought back to reality, after recalling the frustrating memory. “I know the thought of Kai makes you feel a little insecure,” your friend said.

“Don’t remind me…”

“Y/N, if you feel this upset you’re going to have to ask her. You know Jennie can't hold up her act in front of you. Knowing is better than sitting around and wondering what’s going on,” she said. “Look I gotta get some sleep. It’s almost two in the morning. I’ll check on you tomorrow...and think about what I said.”

The line went dead and now you were left alone in the dark with your thoughts. You knew that your friend was right but you weren’t sure if you were ready for your questions to be answered. What if she was cheating? What were you going to do about it? How would you handle it? Were you prepared to leave all three years of memories behind?

[1:47am] Jennie - Are you up right now? Can I come over?

Seeing your phone light up with a notification from your girlfriend almost made you want to laugh. It was as if she knew that you were thinking of her, as if she had intercepted your negative thoughts of lies and cheating.

[1:50am] I am. You can come over now if you want. I want to ask you something.

[1:50 am] Jennie- I’ll be there in 20 mins.

It was now or never. You got dressed, sporting your favorite pair of sweats and a T-shirt. You washed your face and brushed your teeth, worried about what came next. Anything could happen now. If things went well and everything was a figment of your imagination, it’d be over and the two of you would make love all night into the early hours of the morning. But if things went badly, you’d spend the rest of your night crying until you couldn’t cry anymore and burying yourself in a grave full of regret and doubt. Whatever the outcome, you told yourself, it was better than being stuck in a limbo of uncertainty.

A sound at the door disrupted your thoughts. Jennie opened the front door, closing it shut behind her. She was wearing comfy clothes, probably coming straight from practice. Her demeanor was off, with a look of dejection plastered across her face. At the sight of her, your heart began pounding in your chest. She didn’t say anything until she put her coat down and grabbed a glass of water.

The conversation started off with “Hey” and “How was your day?” The next four minutes were filled with small talk, awkward things that you never really talked about before. Her actions were off. She sat, closed off from you. Not once did she try to touch you. Not once did she try to kiss you. Not once did she say she loved you. Your mind already shifted into worst case scenario mode before she even opened her mouth.

“Y/N, I loved you. I want you to know that.” She took a deep breath. Loved. Past tense. “I think It’s time for us to take a break.”

“Why?”

“I’ve been going through a lot after all of these scandals and the mounting pressure from YG and I don't want to keep being a bad girlfriend to you. You deserve better.”

Every word that came from her mouth broke your heart into pieces. How could she suddenly feel this way? Why was there no emotion on her face? Why were there no signs of sadness or regret? What the fuck was the point of the past three years if she was willing to end it all without any sign of remorse. You couldn’t stand the silence and decided to speak, trying to keep your voice down.

“Three Years. We’ve been together three years and that's all you’re gonna say? Seriously Jennie, be honest for once. I can see right through your bullshit. After all this time, why don’t you tell me the truth? Why have you been acting differently?Why haven’t you been answering my calls and taking your time to respond to texts? You don't stop by anymore and you don’t even want me to stop by the studio to bring you food. Why the sudden change?”

You were so angry you hadn’t realized that you were screaming.

Jennie sat there, stone faced and motionless. She knew the answer to all of your questions but couldn’t bring herself to crush you like that. She wanted this to end peacefully, to the point where you could still be friends. But she didn’t know if that was possible. Not after she betrayed you in the worst way.

Back in Paris, she’d gone out for drinks with Kai. You’d both had too much and he flirted with you and you flirted back. She knew she was playing a dangerous line but the idea of playing with fire made her excited. One thing led to another and she crossed the line. She had sex with him, waking up in the middle of the night with her clothes scattered all over the hotel room. She quietly got dressed and left the room, ashamed of the mess she’d made.

She cried in her own hotel room for the rest of the day, ignoring her phone and cutting off communication with everyone. How could she be so selfish? Being drunk was never an excuse. She shouldn't have let herself go like that. She didn't deserve you. You needed someone who was gonna be strong, not a weakling who would betray their lover and jump in bed with the first man that flirted with them.

Soon, she fell back into destructive habits. Everything was out of her control but the one thing she could control was her weight. She went into the bathroom and puked away all of her guilt. She was hoping that it would make all of the guilt and pain disappear but it didn’t. Kai was gorgeous and even though it would be easier, he wasn’t you. Truth be told, she had been denying the realities of her own sexual identity and that night confirmed it for her. She loved you and only you but she knew that you deserved better. She couldn't bring herself to break your heart. She treated you worse and worse, hoping one day you would get sick of her shit and leave but the day didn’t come. You were as loyal as a dog and would never leave her side.

Currently, she was faced with the reality of continuing to lie or being honest with you. She chose honesty. “I fucked up. Y/N, I had sex with Kai.” Jennie burst into tears. “I’m so sorry” Jennie cried into her sweater. She couldn't even hold herself together, fearful of the best thing that ever happened to her would be walking out the door in a minute.

You were motionless.The truth had come to the light and your worst fear was true. She’d lied to you, cheated on you, completely broken your trust…

“For what it's worth, It was only one time,” Jennie explained, “and I was drunk. It’s not an excuse and I’m sorry I couldn’t keep my promise to you to be faithful. I know I'm full of shit. I couldn't handle the guilt and thought that if I pushed you away, it would help. But tonight I’m ready to be a woman and own up to my mistakes and let you know that I love you with all of my heart. If you can find it in your heart to forgive me, I’ll never ever betray you again. I’ll do whatever it takes to prove to you that I love you and that we can get past this. But if you want to call it quits, I understand. Y/N, the decision is all yours now.”

_________________________________________________

Hey Y’all, I finally came back to life and decided to give you a little something something while being trapped at home due to Miss Rona. Depending on how you all like this I will write a conclusion to this. Let me know what would you would do XOXO Admin YOLO

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x-exo · 3 years

Note

*slides into your asks with a rose in my mouth* why hello, tis me!

Apologies for the long wait but your favorite long asks anon is here and OOF so much has happened. Let us break it down one by one lol

Monsta x our beans, welp we can officially say we are army wives for them because shownu is now at the military and just welp this feels weird lol. I lowkey forgot he was meant to enlist so when the news came out I went through so many emotions. Its why the latest comeback feels a bit bittersweet to me. It is their BEST for sure and for this year, I agree so to not see him perform right before he left is a bit sad. I don't blame him of course (if anyone does i am fish slapping you) but just a shame. I'm happy we do get content with him still? Seems pre-planned so that is nice!

Onto legends exo, fantastic comeback. I cannot stop listening to the album, its just bops full of bops to me. They broke so many records and I'm over here sipping my tea because fudge yes. It isn't a full member comeback, 2 of the members featured in the comeback are off playing call of duty and they still did THAT. While having lay properly in the comeback!? (Or at least some form, better than tempo era!) Kyungsoo my beloved, the man that can swoon you off your feet, his proper solo album. Omg I am just in love? The album feels like a Playlist that you hear while taking a walk or on a raodtrip? I love it, I just love everything about this with how much thought was given. It makes me feel warm and I'm so proud of him (I think he even got a first win) but sadly xiumin got the it shall not be named virus D: I feel so bad and I can only hope he gets better! It makes me worried because I keep seeing more and more idols getting sick and I can't help but wonder why don't the kpop entertainment just put a pause with stuff? Of course that is VERY unrealistic, I am aware that is naive for me to think but its just so idk how to word it properly (my English brain is not working I am sorry) I cannot help the feeling of while I get people are being safe and yes we need to still live like normal beings, is it worth risking idols health just for some entertainment? Idk how to explain my thoughts properly but maybe I hope I made sense!!

Onto svt! That is perfectly fine to not vibe with a comeback! I will admit, I didn't fully vibe with this comeback and it shocked me because every comeback was a hit to me. Even fear, left and right or homerun where I know many fans were split on, I liked but RTL was a grower. For me, listening to it without watching the mv, helped it alot and it is a song I like. Is it their best? No I don't think so but it is alright to say "hey I didn't bop to this, not my cup of tea" (imo I blame the mv? The mv REALLY didn't do the song justice at all, I am sorry if I sound like a fake fan but this mv Just is bad in all aspects. Sure we have some pretty shots but like it just doesn't fit at all?) So if anything listening to the song or wishing the live performances does it better. Seeing the choreography amps the song up more, cannot go wrong with their dancing. As for the rest of the songs, I admit game boy is my top favorite? Idk if it is because I am a gaming nerd and found all the production of the song so creative but yeah. We can wait for the next comeback! Svt always have something up their sleeves, plus we do have their music projects to look forward too (I wonder when we will get one? Seeing as RTL promotions stopped) some positive news with the boys is they resigned like a year before their contract ends and I'm a bit emotional :') I'm excited to see the boys future projects. We did have caratland recently! Did you watch it if I may ask? We did get in the soop confirmation so I'm excited to watch that, the boys deserve that nice break (even if it was filmed for a show fjsbsns)

Ok I think that is it for kpop updates? XD I do hope life has been treating you kindly! Life has been a bit all over the place sadly so I hope it wasn't like that for you as well! Until next time my bean!

hii!!!! omg sorry for the late reply i've been pretty busy these days 🙈

indeed so much has happened! and much more since you sent this ask omg!!

our shownu is at war *looks into the distance* *wipes away tear* *sighs* by now I got used to enlistment news (see what happens when you stan 2nd and 3rd gen groups) but STILL [[IT HURT]] when they uploaded the monchannel videos of his goodbye day like ????? what kind of twisted mind diuhdfuihdifuhs but the boys were all so cute and soft but they seemed so sad they didn't want to let go of their super leader :(( I hope he's learning lots and making new friends (and also we've got our international super spy yoo kihyun giving us small updates on him every now and then so everything's fine!). Yeah I totally get you it felt empty without him this comeback and at first it didn't really clicked with me but when the enlistment news came out i understood he had to take care of his health and thoroughly check on his eye sight in order to be 100% ready for the military so it made sense he had to be absent :( everything was so close (the comeback and enlistment) that I'm sure there was no other way for doing it I'm pretty sure he couldn't maybe postpone the enlistment day any further

onto exo! my ksoo my soft boi my romantic boi 🥺 his album is so him SO HIM i can't explain it bur it's just HIM you know it's the type of album you'd play on loop on a summer afternoon when you've taken your papers and paints outside in the garden to paint a bit with the warm soft breeze moving the trees lightly 🤧 and he signs in English and SPANISH (he did it for me) my multilingual king he's a native. Also I've been watching Honeymoon Tavern with Jongin these days and OMG i could d word for him really (if you haven's watched it go do it when you have time) he's SO SOFT and SO CUTE and he works as a waiter and a wedding planner and helps with the room preparations and is also a tour guide and he's just so cute so happy al the time the way he interacts with everyone is so 🥺🤧😭 onto more serious stuff now: yeah i was so worried about minseok catching covid omg but i'm glad he went through it with our any major complication and the rest of the boys are safe too! I guess the industry doesn't stop bc that would mean a huge loss of thousands and thousands of dollars/won/etc so as long as the gov doesn't prohibit going out or gathering like at the beginning of the pandemic, they'll keep on going with the idols' schedules otherwise the industry would just shut down having no way of earning money to sustain all the companies and idols.

as for seventeen! yeah i like the songs too! the mv sure ruined rtl and listening to it without watching it has really helped it grow on me more but still it feels kind of meh to me idk i really like anyone i think it's my favourite from the album. AND NOW WE'VE GOT A COMEBACK IN OCTOBER!!!! yayyyyy i can't wait they seem to be preparing very diligently (i hope they release a sexy bop) it's a shame junhao aren't gonna be present for this comeback but i'm soooooo happy they have the opportunity to visit their families again omg they have spent 2 whole years without seeing them in the flesh they must be so happy to get back to them again!!! it's so funny seeing them be bored at the quarantine hotel and doing lives every day duhdfiudhfiuh i hope it passes quickly and they can see their loved ones finally! and I did watch Caratland!! omg the unit switch song was the best thing ever hhu doing lilili yabbay and not being able to stop laughing idfuhdifuhs perf team doing chocolate and owning it????? hello??? performance team more like main vocal team wow! and the vocal team being a complete mess during check in lmaooo i loved it! In The Soop has finally started!!! I love these kind of "normal life" concepts I love seeing the boys being themselves cooking and relaxing I've watched the first and second eps as of today and also few clips from the third and omg mingyu and jeonghan drowning in the pond dfuhidfhidfs lmao they're so dumb i love them 🤣 i'm glad they could go away for a few days and spend time together away from their hectic schedules!

I hope you're well now and if not hang in there it'll all pass soon enough! 🥰💕 bye bye!!

p.s.: I got your request for the svt this or that gifset and i promise i’ll do it one day i just don’t feel like giffing these days dhbduusi i’m out of energy

#ask #my super nice lovely anon

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youknowthatnerd · 3 years

Text

Home Sick- Lee Felix

Genre: Fluff? Angst? I’m not sure

Words: 1K

It took a long time to realize the feeling in his gut was homesickness. He never thought he would miss that place. But here he was, as far away as he could possibly get, feeling to my stomach, I stepped up on stage, ready to perform.

StrayKids was on tour in America, nothing completely new for us. When I had first moved to Korea, I felt sick, homesickness. And here I was, feeling it again. I never thought I would experience it again. I never thought I would grow accustomed to Seoul. The people there made it home, the rest of StrayKids, the managers. And they all came with us no matter where I went, so I never would have expected to experience this feeling ever again.

What a terrible feeling it truly was.

I push down the bile in the back of my throat and get into formation. It was the first night in Chicago, three more to go, then two days of resting then off to the next place it was. I wasn't ready.

The applause made everything worse, but I perceived and focused on the task at hand.

This is my job.

The concert dragged on for what felt like years, and when it finally ended everyone was exhausted. It hadn't just felt like a long one, it was long.

"Felix, you're performance was slow and staggered, delayed if you will. Do better next time, ok?" The manager spoke up behind me.

"I'll try." I muttered back quietly. "I'm going out. You guys head back to the dorm without me, I promise I'll be quick." I told the other boys.

I had already changed out of my concert outfit into simple sweats, a shirt, and a jacket, so I slipped out the back exit before anyone could tell me otherwise.

My manager can yell at me later. I need to clear my mind.

The exit leads into a small alley way which then exits into the personal parking lot. I obviously didn't have a car, so I didn't bother with this lot and headed for the nearest side walk. My phone vibrated in my pocket, I pulled it out and turned off my data.

I don't want their sympathetic messages. I don't want their worrying, or them tracking me. I just want to be alone.

Worry grew in my stomach but I push it down, my hand tightening around the small pocket knife I hold in my jacket. I wouldn't need to use it I'm sure, taekwondo would most likely suffice, but it helps to mellow the worry.

I reached the parking lot and examined the stores lining the sides of the street leading up to the stadium where the concert was held. The sun was setting and some stores were closed, but I wasn't here for stores.

I continue down the side walk, looking at the cute simple Knick knacks and mannequins in the store front windows. Nothing caught my eye so I just continued on down the side walk. The air was getting chilly.

I crossed the road to the next block, starting down one side. The moon was shining brightly in the sky at this point.

Barely any stores were open and the side walks were becoming deserted. I should step into a store to warm up here soon.

On this side of the block, no lights shown, only the end corner was shining, I suppose I'll stop there. No sign was above this store, I guess I'll find out when I get closer.

I reach the door of the shop and peer inside. The bright lights nearly blinding me. The shelves were lined with album after album. Light sticks sat on shelves. This was a KPop shop. I wonder if any STAYs work here?

I pull the door open excitedly, a pleasant jingle filling me ears followed by a simple,"Hello, let me know if you need help with anything!" From a lady working at the counter. Her voice was pleasant and she wore a simple black shirt, he had pulled up out of her face in a messy bun. She was pretty.

"Hello, is there perhaps a STAY working here? I have a present for them." I respond. The girl looks up from work at her counter and makes eye contact. Her eyes grow to the size of saucers and she stutters out "I'm, uh. I'm the only person working here?" I raise my eyebrow.

"Why do you say it like a question." I chuckle at her cute reaction.

"No! It's not a question. I am. I'm the only person working here, truthfully. I am, however, a STAY. Its nice to see you Felix! I wasn't able to make it to the concert." She frowns "I'm sorry I wasn't able to come."

"Nah, it's totally fine. I understand tickets can be expensive. Is there any particular song you were looking forward to seeing performed? Oh, and another thing, any albums you don't have that you want?" I reach into my back pocket.

"Oh Umm. I would've loved to see Victory Song. It's such a good song! And uh, I mean of course there are, but I don't need them, need to save my money ya know?" She chuckles nervously.

"You do know I wasn't always an idol right." I chuckle. "How about any StrayKids albums? Are there any you want." I wave my wallet in her face. "I have money."

Her face flushes red. "No! I couldn't allow you to buy albums for me!"

"Are you so sure about that?" I hurry around the store and grab all of the SKZ albums I can. "If you won't tell me which you want and done have, I'll just buy them all." I smile at her. "Could you ring these up." She nods sheepishly.

"Ok. . You really done have to do this! Honestly." She mutters out.

"I know I don't have to, but I want to." I beam at her. "Now, may I have your name? I'll sign these for you too. Actually, who's your bias? I can take these home and get these signed. And we could meet here and I could give them to you!"

"You're too nice Felix. . . But taking them home wouldn't be necessary. You're my bias. Uh you can call me Anna, my real name is Anastasia but that's to fancy for me." She looks up at me, "Thank you for this. Truly."

"No problem. Is there somewhere I can sit? I don't feel like heading back just yet. We can chat."

My night out was long, I stumble into the dorm late, around 1 or 2. Having spent the whole time with the nice STAY named Anna. It was a nice night, and the heaviness in my heart seems to have disappeared.

#felix #lee felix #skz #stray kids #idol au

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steakook · 4 years

Text

not a house but a home

Pairing: boyfriend!Jungkook x Reader

Word Count: 1.8k

Warnings: Domestic Fluff, Angst, very very light Smut if you squint

A/N: feeling all kinds of soft for the babie after his “Never Not” cover. This was supposed to be a Drabble but, as always, jungkook takes my heart further ༼;´༎ຶ.̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̸̨̨̨̨̨̨̨̨̨̨̨̨.̸̸̨̨۝ ༎ຶ༽ . Enjoy!

///

“Babe?”

I let out an unintelligible response. My toothbrush is still buzzing in my mouth, for God’s sake. Jungkook takes it as a sign to continue.

“Can you please please PLEASE clean your side of the bathroom?” He says pleadingly with puppy dog eyes but also a hint of seriousness. He means business today.. of all days, Monday.

“SDFGHHH!!! DFYJKGGJK” I let out.

“I know it’s morning and I know you’re grumpy but PLEASE I can’t keep looking at this mess.”

I spit out into my sink. As I’m doing so I look at the cocktail of toiletries that litters my side of the vanity. 5 different Bobbi brown lip tints strewn about. Several makeup brushes and palettes clutter the white marble. Multiple face washes, moisturizes, and various other skincare products I’ve been sold by the deceptive Sephora employees, 83% of which I don’t use. Hair. Hair everywhere. I can’t help it, with hair like this I can’t just empty my comb every single day.

“I have no idea what you’re referring to.” I say to my beautiful and unfortunately meticulous boyfriend with a smirk.

He heaved a loaded sigh.

“Baaaaaabe.”

Here we go.

“I can’t look at this every morning!! How can you have your side so messy and still be able to operate throughout the day clearly?! Being organized brings peace to one’s life.”

Oh God I don’t remember putting something up his ass last night and leaving it there. I giggle in my head. I need to save that joke for later.

“You know, if I knew you’d be this messy, I would’ve just stayed at the dorms. Living with you is basically as bad as living with them.” Jungkook says, no trace of playfulness in his voice.

“Oh really? The same? Y’all giving each other cuddles?? Y’all sucking each other’s dicks?! Hmm??”

Ok in all honesty i really shouldn’t start a fight this early in the morning let alone week. But he knows how grumpy I am in the mornings. Not only do I have to wake up and ungodly hour (7am is ungodly for some of us, okay?), but I naturally hate being forced out of my comfy bed cuddling with my exorbitantly organized but very hot boyfriend.

I look at him. He has an incredulous look in his eyes. We’ve had this fight multiple times since moving in with each other 6 months ago. To be quite frank, there have been more growing pains than happy moments. I started realizing my organized chaos choice of living deeply contrasted jungkook’s need to put everything in its place and if it can be alphabetized, all the better. I’m annoyed and so is he.

“Are you serious? Can’t you do this ONE thing for me? One thing that will significantly improve not only mine but your life as well? I swear it’s amazing how much you accomplish at work when you practically do nothing at home.”

Oh. Wasn’t expecting that.

He must see the change in playfulness in my face, immediately regretting his words.

“Babe I’m sor-“

“Don’t worry about it. I have to finish getting ready. I have a big presentation to present to the Japanese stockholders this afternoon regarding our globalization plan.... I mean, hopefully i don’t fuck it up seeing as how I live my life in such a clusterfuck it’s a wonder how i get things done there. Right, jungkook?”

I don’t wait for him to answer as i leave our shared bathroom but he just continues to stand there. I hit him low too.

Living together has put quite a strain on our relationship because we haven’t really found that symbiotic rhythm yet. To be honest, I kick ass and take names in the board room but I’ve never found myself to be very... well... domestic at home. Jungkook, on the other hand, not only is good at every chore. He is amazing. he has a neurotic obsession with making sure laundry never overflows in the hamper, dishes are always clean and the sink is empty, and making sure dust never accumulates. I swear to God. For someone who is an international kpop sensation, how does he have time to keep our house looking so great everyday.

This is a quality of his I worship. His never ending never endingness. There is always work to be done, this can always be cleaner, that can always be done today not tomorrow. Me, on the other hand, I wear two hats. There is the Business Y/N who has an MBA and literally climbed her way up the corporate ladder. Queen of making deals and making grown men cry around the world. I have a 401k. I know. Amazing. But outside of that, I’ve always been Party, easy going Y/N. My job already requires me to be ruthless yet charismatic AND strategic everyday, I don’t need to bring that elsewhere.

If I hadn’t had the second hat, I don’t think I would have ever met jungkook. We met at a random awards show I was attending for fun with some friends, my close friend from B-school scoring us tickets within the artists’ seating. We’ve been inseparable ever since.

I’ve always envied kook for his ability to be at the forefront in everything in his life. From his career, to his multitude of sports and hobbies, to taking care of his homestead. He’s more serious and cares more about little things than I think he purposely lets on. We are yin and yang. opposites attract, yes, but can they actually coexist?

It’s been a long day when i get home at 10pm. Funny enough, both our schedules are so hectic but perfectly align with his late dance practices and my evening calls to Belgium.

Our golden doodle puppy greets me.

“Matcha!!!!!! How are you my love???” She showers me with kisses. Oh how lovely this is after a particularly shitty day.

I turn into the tv room and see him laying there icing his knee. He looks gorgeous. Even now, barefaced and in a hoodie that’s three times his should-be size and basketball shorts, watching the 6th season of nartuto. (For the 7th time).

We look at each other waiting for one to break. It’s always been like this. What more could you expect from two highly-competitive and maybe a bit self-righteous individuals? Maybe we are more similar than we are different.

“Hi baby.” I cave.

The hard look on his face softens. He puts his guard down, relieved we won’t have to fight. I go over and lay down next to him making sure i don’t hit his knee. He wraps me in his large arms and I feel a glow of comfort. He smells like fresh laundry. (Which is probably accurate since he made sure to do a load today before heading to the studio.. someone say ANAL RETENTIVE with me!!)

“You smell so nice.” He is soft. No, he is softness personified. As much of a tough, stubborn Virgo as he is, he is a ball of pudding when it comes to after work moments like these. He tucks his nose into my hair. And kisses me absentmindedly.

“About this morning-“ He starts. But I cut him off.

“No, no. I’m sorry. I know it’s been hard living together with our opposing..... lifestyle choices” he snorts. “But I know you’ve had to bend to me more than I’ve had to bend to you. And for that I’m sincerely sorry. I haven’t made nearly as much of an effort to make this work. But the change has been hard for me. I’ve never had to live with a boy let alone share a bathroom with one. And not only that, I had always imagined I WOULD BE THE CLEANER ONE.” He chuckles quietly and plants some chaste kisses on my temples.

“Babe, no. I know. You’re still adjusting. But I need to apologize too. I didn’t mean what I said earlier but i just get so frustrated sometimes! You’re hard headed and I am too. But still I shouldn’t have said those things I’ve said about you not being great at your job. Your ferocity is one of the reasons i love you. It’s also extremely hot.”

I smile and look up into those big brown doe eyes and I melt. How could he look so good after practicing the whole day? And how could he be so patient and loving to someone like me? Messy and unorganized.

“I love you. So much. I don’t deserve to be with someone like you. You’re amazing at everything it’s so damn frustrating sometimes. Not only do you devote your life to an occupation that require so much of you, you also still make time to take care of us, this place. I’m sorry I don’t make things easy.”

“Y/N. You may be frustratingly messy. I don’t understand how one person can produce so much goddamn hair at once to be quite honest. You shed more than Matcha. But being with you is easy. You make life easy. You give me easiness when so so so many other things in this life are so hard and time consuming. So many people want so much from me and I want to be the person they need. But when I’m with you, it doesn’t feel like work. It’s easiness in its purest sense. Even though you don’t clean up your shit.”

I giggle.

“But even then, i wouldn’t trade this for anything else.”

I kiss him chastely and he holds my chin up for better access. We kiss like this for a while before he swipes his tongue against my lip asking for permission. Though he doesn’t need any. The kiss escalated into something deeper. Hotter. He licks into my mouth and I feel heat stir in my stomach. Fuck.

He uses his arms already wrapped around me to place me on top of him. Ice bag long forgotten on the floor. We make out passionately as if our lives depend on it. I put my hand to the back of his neck and run through his gorgeous thick chocolate hair. So lush.

I find myself straddling his waist and grind my core against his half hard-on. He moans.

“Fuck..”

I grind harder with intention and fill fires of lust consume me. Holy fucking shit. It always feels like the first time. He puts his hands on my thighs gripping them and forcing me to go harder onto his dick.

After a few minutes he sits up, lips still connected and lifts me up. I smirk into the kiss already knowing where this is going. He carries me along the marbled tile hallway to our bedroom and throws me on the bed. He strips himself of his hoodie.

“You know... you’ve been quite disobedient to me, Y/N. I think it’s time to put you in your place.” He says sternly. God, he has never looked more hot.

///

A/N: thank you so much for reading!!!! Hopefully you enjoyed it as much as I enjoyed writing it. This is my first fic so please let me know if you liked it!

Lots of love.

-M

#jungkook smut #jungkook angst #jungkook reader #bts smut #jungkook x reader #bangtanarmynet #jungkook fluff #boyfriend!jungkook #domestic!jungkook #jungkook #slice of life

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melonkooky · 4 years

Text

love unlike any other [jeon jungkook]

not requested

word count: 8053

genre: fluff and angst (it’s like 1/4 fluff, 3/4 angst), happy ending, small/singer/unpopular band thing, singer (but not kpop idol)!jungkook x reader

warnings: parties and nightclubs, heavy drinking

author’s note: was at first based off a song but then i strayed away from it so it’s more of an idea that i wanted to write (cause you know, i’m a hoe for angsty fighting with happy endings, so why not write one with my bias?). this is super long and i’m sorry for that. i have not gone through for any mistakes and grammar errors but what’s new? i say that every author’s note 😂😂...

please do not copy my work. but please like and reblog it. thank you!!

the first time you saw him, it was at a party. it was your best friend’s birthday party. her twenty first to be exact. so naturally she wanted to celebrate it at a bar/nightclub setting. where else?

minhee, your best friend, was a party animal, and that’s how she always had been, at least since you and her started high school. she instantly became your cliche, popular girl. you ended up getting roped into that stereotype as well, as you were constantly around minhee, and she was always including you. even though minhee was popular, she was known for being kind-hearted and outgoing. she never failed to leave someone out. so, for her party, she invited all her past high school friends, and told them to bring their friends. she said she wanted to fill up the whole building and party the night away.

you were more of the shy, not so outgoing, type. though that didn’t stop you from making friends and hanging out with them, you still liked to keep from being the center of attention.

going back to him, you had been sitting in a booth, by yourself, watching silently. minhee was partying in the center of everyone, dancing, drinking, laughing, all that you could imagine at an event like this one. you were happy because minhee was happy.

you spotted him as you were finishing your own glass of alcohol. you had already forgotten what it was called. minhee had ordered it for you, claiming that you would like it, and you did, so you ordered a few more. your head was already feeling fuzzy, but that didn’t distract you from making eye contact with the young man that was with his own group of friends. he was laughing at something his friend had said, but still made eye contact. he had looked away within a split second. if there hadn’t been flashing red and green and blue lights everywhere, you might’ve seen a light blush on his cheeks.

suddenly, minhee was next to you, talking into your ear. “i want you to meet someone, rather some people.”

your stomach immediately was filled with anxiety. she was drunk, you could tell from the way she stumbled as you followed you and how her breath smelled of her citrusy drink. you worried for her slightly. you joined her, surprised to see that it had been the group of boys you were watching just moments ago.

you met his eyes again, this time it was your turn to blush. he was smiling, all his attention on you rather than on minhee. “y/n,” she yelled over the music, “this is hoseok.” she gestured to the guy who was moving along to the rhythm of the music.

he smiled. “hoseok.” he introduced himself and you shook his hand.

you said your name before turning to minhee. “we went to elementary school together.” she explained.

you nodded, understanding.

and then hoseok was introducing his friends. they all were nice, and few of them made you laugh as they were introducing themselves. they were a little drunk, some more than others. that’s when you learned that his name was jeon jungkook, the one that you seemed to be developing a small crush over. you had never seen him before.

as the night drew on, you found yourself wanting to leave. you were the designated driver for minhee, knowing that she had little to no control. although you were feeling the effects of the alcohol as well, and wondered how you were going to get home. maybe minhee wanted to leave with you.

you sought out your best friend. you couldn’t find her however, which was unusual. a sick feeling enveloped your heart and stomach as you frantically searched for her. she wasn’t on the dance floor, or in any of the booths, or at the bar, where could she be?

finally, you wandered to the back where the bathrooms were, and there she was. the last place you would expect her to be.

she was being kissed by a girl that was shorter than her. you weren’t surprised, of course she would find someone to kiss. the girl pulled away, noticing you, and then minhee saw you. she grinned. “i think i just found the love of my life.”

the girl blushed.

you smiled, “anyway, i’m taking off, minhee. do you need a ride?”

she shook her head. “i’m not ready to leave. besides, i’m sure yoonji can take me home.”

you felt awkward suddenly, as if you were in the middle of something you weren’t supposed to be in the middle of, like you were interrupting something, like you were seeing something you should’ve have. nevertheless you smiled, “alright then, text me when you get home, or at least in the morning.”

“of course.” she replied.

you turned to walk away, before minhee was calling your name. you turned. “are you sure you should be driving?” minhee asked. even through the alcohol, you could hear the worry.

you nodded. “bye, minhee. happy birthday.”

“bye! i love you!”

you laughed and blew her a kiss before turning away. you sighed tiredly, your head beginning to ache, whether it was from the alcohol or the music. you had to push people aside and mumble apologies left and right as you tried to reach the exit of the nightclub. you stumbled by hoseok and his friends, they were making fun of jimin for something. you flashed them a smile.

“leaving already?” hoseok asked.

you nodded. “yeah, i’m exhausted. it was nice meeting you guys.”

you hurried out of the doors. relief washed over you in a instant as you felt the cool, night breeze. you hadn’t realized how hot and crowded it was inside, and to suddenly feel the cool and open air, you felt better.

you sighed as you walked. it probably wasn’t the best idea to be walking by yourself, especially this late at night. but your car was only a block away. if you hurried, you would be alright. but should you even be driving? they say one drink is one too many when it comes to driving.

suddenly, you heard the fairly recognizable sound of the door squeaking as it was opened. it closed and then there were footsteps heading towards you, as if someone was jogging. you felt nervous, wondering who it was. “y/n.” it was a man.

you turned and saw it had been jeon jungkook that was running towards you. you were shocked to say the least. you couldn’t fight the heat rising in your cheeks. “jungkook?”

he finally reached your side, panting slightly. “hey.” he seemed a little shy, perhaps even nervous.

“what are you doing?”

“i wanted to ask if you have a ride, you know, to go home.”

you blushed. “yeah, my car is just a block from here.”

he nodded, seeming relieved. “well, would you mind if i take you home?”

“do you have a car?”

he shook his head. “no,” he laughed, “i rode with my friends. but i can drive. i didn’t drink anything.”

that was a relief. you weren’t sure if you could trust yourself to drive home, not with a fuzzy, aching, drunk mind. “well, that’s really kind of you. uh, my car is just a block from here.”

he grinned. “let’s go.”

the ride, at first was a little awkward. you were silently watching jungkook drive, trying not to make it obvious. he had one hand on the steering wheel and the other resting on the gear shift. you couldn’t suppress your thoughts. this man, this acquaintance, was very attractive. it wasn’t long before you started a conversation, and then you and him couldn’t stop talking. things clicked between you and him.

“so, where do you live?” he eventually asked.

your cheeks reddened. “i forgot to tell you.” you said, while laughing.

he grinned. he was adorable too.

you told you where you had lived, feeling a bit nervous. you weren’t sure where things were heading. and to give someone who was practically a stranger, your address, for all you knew, you just signed your death sentence. but jungkook didn’t give off any negative vibes. he seemed cute, genuine, the type to bring someone’s daughter home at just as the clock strikes eight, just as the father had asked. luckily you lived in a small apartment by yourself, seeing as you were an adult, so you didn’t have to worry about any parents.

soon, jungkook was pulling into the parking lot that was next to your apartment. he asked where you usually parked, and you told him anywhere.

“do you, um, want to come inside?” you blushed. “maybe wait until someone can pick you up or until i’m sober enough to drop you off somewhere…”

jungkook turned off the car, causing the car lights ahead to turn on. you noticed how red his cheeks had become. “sure.”

things were awkward again, but it was more comfortable compared to earlier. he was nice, a gentlemen, making sure you were comfortable with him around, keeping his distance. when he walked into your apartment, his eyes were going around to all the pictures you had and all the decorations. you thought he was looking at the pillow and blanket on the couch from when you had taken a nap right before minhee’s party. “sorry, i’m a mess.” you commented, hurrying to pick up a few things here and there.

“don’t worry about it.” he had a smile on his face.

“are you hungry?”

“sure.”

you ended up cooking two servings of ramen, wondering if it was enough for the both of you. you and him finished the entire thing. soon after, you and him sparking conversations, getting to know one another. the conversation eventually led to your couch. you sat on one end, a blanket resting up to your chin while he sat on the other.

you felt comfortable around him. and your crush on him was growing stronger. you wondered if it was becoming more noticeable as you began to flirt. was he flirting as well? or did he talk to ladies like this all the time? you couldn’t tell.

“no, i’m serious. i like to keep it cold so that i can bundle up in my blankets.” you said after he made a comment about you being wrapped in a blanket when you were still wearing your jacket. a thought about changing your clothes crossed your mind, but that was a little weird to do around him. “i’m serious.” you sat up, letting the blanket fall into your lap, before holding out your hands to jungkook.

he was hesitant to touch your hands, but you didn’t notice. when he held them, your heart skipped a beat. his hands were warm, soft, comforting. and you wondered if you weren’t going to let go. a blanket of silence fell over you and jungkook, which led your mind to drift. jungkook hadn’t let go of your hands, and you were sure you didn’t want him too. his thumb was caressing the back of your hands.

breaking the silence, he scoffed lightly. his voice was quiet and distant, as if he was distracted. “your hands are cold.”

you met his eyes. they were so kind, and comforting, and welcoming, your inside were twisting and somersaulting, full of anxiety and anticipation. what was going to happen next?

suddenly, you were leaning forward and your lips were on top of his. the action was so quick, you almost didn’t know if you imagined yourself doing it or if it actually happened. jungkook was taken back, his cheeks matching the color of your rug. he hadn’t let go of your hands, until he was reaching towards your cheeks and pulling you closer to him. he was kissing you this time, and you could feel the emotion. almost hungry-like, his kiss was full of passion and determination.

you pulled away moments later, blushing and panting. jungkook took this time to start planting kisses on your cheek, heading towards your jawline, and down your neck. “i guess you’re not going home anytime soon.” you whispered.

he stopped kissing you to meet your eyes. “if you’ll let me stay the night…” he suggested, a mischievous smirk on his face.

you grinned, leaning forward, “i don’t think i will…”

the morning, you woke up, almost forgetting what had happened. it had felt like a dream, a really good one. you felt delirious, happy, until you began to feel the effects of drinking. you sighed, registering the slightly heavy weight on top of your bare stomach. you glanced down, seeing that you were wrapped in your blankets on your bed, but when you moved your hand around underneath the blanket, you felt another arm, his arm. that was when you peered next to you, finding him.

you blushed, remembering last night. you hadn’t expected things to go that route, but you didn’t regret it.

you found yourself smiling, turning onto your side and cuddling into the man next to you. jungkook… the warmth of his bare chest was addictive. instantly, he was pulling you closer. you chewed on your bottom lip, studying his face. his skin was flawless, reflecting the sunlight perfectly. your finger traces the bridge of his nose, then his pink lips, and then his jawline, and then you were brushing his black hair out of his face. you were blushing furiously, your cheeks aching from trying not to smile too widely.

you had to remind yourself that you had only met this man last night, you had only offered him to stay until he could go home, you hadn’t expected to kiss him (amongst other things, of course). you were falling in love with a man you just met. it was like all the love stories you’ve read when you were a teenager. this type of story only happened in fiction novels, and yet here you were, laying next to a man, one you had spent the night with. it was as if you were in a dream, in your own little love story.

he stirred, his nose twitching slightly. “that tickles…” he mumbled tiredly.

you laugh, trying to be quiet and not move too much. “sorry.”

he then opened his eyes, revealing the dark brown eyes that had captivated you just last night. his cheeks immediately turned to a shade of reddish-pink, and a shy grin formed on his face. “hi.” he spoke, laughing nervously.

you grinned, feeling just as shy as he was. “hi.”

“how are you?” he asked.

“i’m good. how are you?”

“hungry.”

you laughed again. “maybe we should eat something?”

“we?”

you blushed again, suddenly avoiding his eyes. “i mean, only if you want to. i’m hungry too, but if you have places to be, that’s okay too.”

“no, no, that’s okay with me. but maybe you should drop me off at my apartment so that i could shower.”

you blushed, this time out of embarrassment. “right! of course.”

“but then we can meet up.” jungkook suggested.

you smiled. “okay.”

you and him hurriedly got dressed, him in his old clothes and you in pajamas. your backs were turned to each other. it was as if you two hadn’t just seen each other without any clothes on just a few hours ago. it felt silly, but it was a good kind of silly.

you drove him home, asking when you and him should meet. you saw that it was ten in the morning, so you and him opted to have lunch instead.

you hurried home, practically screaming and laughing. you were happy, in love, and you felt giddy about it. you’ve never felt this way before. and jungkook seemed to be interested in you you as well.

you remembered that night well. it was a happy memory that you hoped you would never forget.

and so, you and jungkook met up for lunch. little did you know then, that you would be spending as much time as possible with jungkook. almost everyday for weeks, you devoted your time to him. of course you and him had to work. he was a local musician that you just so happened to not know, and you worked as a painter that did commissions.

one night, you were laying on top of jungkook, head turned towards the tv in your living room. some tv show was playing, you were focused on it, even though you wondered if you missed something because you had no idea what was happening. jungkook, on the other hand, his mind was elsewhere.

you had been clouding his mind all day, which really wasn’t totally unusual. but it was different. a thought had crossed his mind earlier in the night, when you had showed up at his recent gig. he was playing at a local hangout spot for young adults, him and his band, which you found out what hoseok and the rest of the boys. you hadn’t known what their profession was, who they were, and you were surprised that minhee had known then for a long time. you, in a way, wished that she had introduced you sooner, so that you would have met jungkook earlier.

jungkook had noticed you in the crowd, near the back. he could tell you were uncomfortable, you didn’t know anyone and were alone. but you nonetheless were smiling brightly at him. he played the best that he could, just to impress you. and since then, he could not stop thinking about you.

jungkook pressed a kiss to your head, making you smile. you lifted your head up, resting your arms on top of his chest. you pressed a kiss to his cheek, before laying back down. jungkook was itching to tell you what his mind was constantly thinking about. it was about to burst out of him, he was growing restless.

finally, he worked up the courage. he would whisper it, that way if you weren’t necessarily listening, you wouldn’t notice, but there would still be that small chance that you would hear it. anxiety immediately pooled in the pit of his stomach. his heart wanted to race, and he tried to best to calm his nerves.

finally, pulling you into him tighter, making you shift slightly, he whispered into your hair, “i love you.”

you heard him.

you’ve been waiting for him to say it first.

you waited a few moments, however, questioning if it came from the tv show or if you were imagining things or if he had actually said it. of course your mind was overthinking things. but, you lifted your head, eyes searching for his dark ones. his ears and cheeks were growing red as the seconds ticked by. you chewed your bottom lip before scooting upwards. his attention finally was on you, just as you brushed a stray piece of hair behind your ear and pressed your lips onto jungkook’s. he was shocked, but only for a split second, before he returned the kiss. the kiss was warm, longing, as if you couldn’t express your love for each other.

it wasn’t enough.

so things grew heated, and before you knew it, clothes were thrown around your apartment and you were in your bed, making love with the love of your life. your one true love.

but, not everything was full of rainbows.

jungkook’s career started taking of. he was gone for long periods of time. he would try his best to text you and keep you updated but of course, he would either forget or choose not to. your heart yearned for him. you and him had been inseparable for so long, and now that he was away, you felt empty. you told yourself that you could live without him, you had been perfectly happy before you met him. but having been with him for so long now, things weren’t right.

you missed him, and your apartment was often still and bare.

one night, you decided to look up his band, finding that they were playing at a hotspot for bands, one that they’ve played at multiple times. you drove there in a hurry, imagining him being happy to see you, him kissing you, him repeatedly telling you that he missed you.

however, you were a little late, much too late. their performance was over just as someone walked onto the stage, thanking jungkook’s band for performing. your heart dropped, but you immediately wondered around, searching for them. you found them in a room in the back, probably only meant for performers, but no one stopped you. what you didn’t expect was for him to be talking to an unknown girl. she was evidently flirting with him, and he would smile, a smile you through was only supposed to be for you.

you were frozen, unable to move. you couldn’t pry your eyes away.

your name was called. you blinked, and suddenly, hoseok was standing directly in front of you, concern filling his eyes. you touched your cheek, finding tears. you stared in shock at him, and then glanced behind his shoulder, seeing jungkook. he had stood up from the couch. he seemed shocked as well. at least the girl was across the room. but you were angry, upset. you felt that you were being dramatic, it’s not like he was cheating. but it felt like it. so then a spiral of emotions took over your body.

“y/n.” this time jungkook called your name, prompting hoseok to step out of the way, unsure of what to do.

you shook your head. “i shouldn’t have come.” you whispered before sprinting away.

you heard your name again, barely over the loud noise of the next performers. their music was loud, angry, and it only influenced your emotions. the crowd was hard to push through, and they only made you angrier. you just wanted to leave, and it seemed that the crowd of music lovers were only making things harder.

finally things felt clearer, like you had room to breathe, as you finally pushed open the door and felt the cool air of the night. you glanced around, finding a few passerbys staring at you. you hated the attention. you felt ridiculous for how you were acting. it wasn’t even jungkook’s fault, for all you knew. maybe the girl didn’t realize that he had a…

you paused…

you and jungkook… you and him never really put labels on each other. you knew he loved you, and he knew you loved him. that was something practically unspoken between you and him.

you shook your head. you were overreacting. you were just upset, you missed him, and were just caught off guard by him being close to another girl.

before you could walk away, a hand caught your wrist. you spun around, shocked, before realizing it was jungkook. “what do you want?” you asked coldly.

jungkook was shocked still. he was worried you could tell. “what’s wrong?” he asked. “tell me.”

“nothing. nothing is wrong.” you said forcefully. you were more trying to convince yourself that nothing was wrong.

jungkook released your wrist, shaking his head. “that’s a lie.”

“what do you want me to say, jungkook?”

he scoffed. “why are you so angry?”

“because!”

he cursed, taking in a deep breath. you were angering him, and that was only making things worse. “you wanna know?”

“i believe i asked.”

you ignored him. “i’m angry because you had been blowing me off. you’ve hardly texted me, talked to me, made an effort to see me.” you were crying again, and you hated it. “and then, when i find that you’re playing here, i show up, and find you with another girl.”

“is this really what it’s all about? you come to see me and you get angry at some girl? am i not allowed to talk to girls now?”

you rolled your eyes. “that’s not what i meant.”

“are you sure? because that’s what it seems like to me. we’re just friends.”

“look. i was just worried about you.” your voice immediately quieted to a whisper. “and i missed you. and because of that, and to see a girl flirting with you, and i can’t help but think that…” you stopped, shaking your head. “this is stupid. nevermind.”

jungkook’s gaze softened. he stepped closer to you. “tell me.”

you avoided his gaze. all your anger had vanished, replaced but deep sadness. “i just thought that maybe we were growing apart, that you were moving on. i hadn’t see you for so long, and it just... i assumed...”

jungkook smiled, his gaze still sad. he gently pulled you into a hug. “baby, i don’t think i will ever get over you.”

your heart began to race. the feeling of jungkook’s arms around you, his soothing voice whispering into your hair, this was what you needed. you missed this. “i’m sorry.” you mumbled into his shirt, wrapping your arms around his torso.

jungkook laughed lightly. “don’t be sorry. i should be sorry for neglecting you for so long.”

you lifted your head up to look at him, a hopeful look in your eyes. he smiled at you, and kissed your nose. “now take me home.”

your eyes widened. “but what about your bandmates?”

jungkook shrugged. “eh, i’m sure they’ll understand.”

you nodded, feeling a heavy weight lift off of your shoulders. “alright then.”

you and jungkook went back home, or rather back to your apartment, where he held you close, where he whispered sweet nothings, where he kissed you. he made up for lost time.

that was until he had to leave again.

“i’m sorry, babe, but i can’t miss this.”

you pouted. “i know, i just wish you could be here with me.”

he smiled, pressing a kiss to your forehead. “i’ll text you, okay?”

he kissed your lips before practically running out of the apartment, leaving you in the uncomfortable and lonely silence. he had just come back, not even a week ago, and then he was gone again.

you were beginning to question whether you and him were meant to be. things had been so perfect at first, and now, it seemed like things were falling apart. you couldn’t help but think. maybe you just needed to wait it out a little longer, no matter how much it hurts. or maybe, maybe you should tell him about your feelings, your insecurities, all of it. or maybe, maybe you should break things off with him.

of course, your heart immediately broke at that thought.

you wanted jungkook to be happy, and you knew that by him gaining popularity and becoming a musician made him happy. you were also proud of him for getting so far, and you could only imagine all the places he would go.

but where would things go between you and him? what if he had to move? would you and him be able to do long distance? would things fall apart? would you be able to move with him? would his bandmates be okay with that? would the management that he would end up signing with be okay with that? there were so many questions, and you shouldn’t even be worrying about that far into the future, not yet.

you sighed tiredly, feeling emotionally drained. you wondered what you should do to get your mind off of things. paint? no, you just finished a mural. your hand might fall off if you painted a second more. watch a drama? no, you might cry and wish that jungkook was there with you. sighing once more, you ruffled your hair with your hands. then you reached for your phone. you found yourself calling minhee.

the phone hardly rang before you heard her cheery voice on the other side. your heart lightened, just a smidge.

“hey, lovely!”

“hi, minhee. what are you up to?”

“absolutely nothing. kinda bored, to be honest.”

you laughed. “me too.”

she gasped. “what if we do something?”

“i’d be down for that.”

“great! what should we do? see a movie, paint and get drunk, bar bingo, go to a bar, skinny dipping…”

“definitely not the painting one.”

she laughed. “i know. wait! i just remembered, there’s a party tonight. yoonji invited me to it and asked if i wanted to bring you. i almost forgot about it.”

you thought to yourself for a second. maybe it would be good for you to get out. minhee would be there to ease your mind, should you tell her your worries. “alright, i’ll just meet up at your house. i’ll drive.”

“sounds like a plan! the party's at eight, so meet me here around seven thirty?”

“perfect. see you later!”

you hung up and set your phone down in front of you on the bed. your recent phone calls still showed on your screen. minhee being the recent one obviously, but underneath her name were all your attempts to get a hold of jungkook. your heart began to sink before you shook your head, clearing your mind. you were not going to think about him, tonight was for you, and that’s it. that’s a promise.

unfortunately, it was still late morning, so you had lots of time to kill before then. but you would think of ways to pass the time.

it wasn’t long before you were stepping into a hot shower. you sung along to your playlist of songs that made you happy. then you got dressed in a rather revealing dress, you were going all out, and applied whichever makeup you felt. soon enough, you were grabbing your purse and a jacket, before heading out to your car.

you picked up minhee, who was hyping you up about your outfit. she teased you for finally getting up after being obsessed with jungkook. you went along with it, not letting his name affect you. you were doing this to make yourself feel better.

soon, you were pulling up to a rather large house. you parked on a street nearby, mentioning to minhee that you and her would have to walk.

as you and her were walking, arms entwined, you looked at her. “you won’t abandon me tonight, right?”

minhee looked offended by your question. she looked visibly horrified. “do you really think i would do that?”

you flashed a small smile, but it wasn’t convincing in minhee’s eyes. she pulled you closer. “what’s wrong?”

you sighed. “i told myself i wouldn’t think about him. tonight was supposed to be the night that i don’t think about all the problems in my life, you know?”

“him as in jungkook?”

you nodded.

“i won’t press you for details, i’ll wait until you tell me on your own. but, i will help you have fun tonight.” she flashed you a smile.

you couldn’t help but smile back. you were thankful to have a friend like minhee. things would probably be totally different and not as exciting if you had never met her. you also probably wouldn’t have met jungkook.

and there he was again, taking over your mind.

but you ignored it and continued walking. before you knew it, you could hear music coming from the house that the party was being hosted at. through the windows, you could see colorful lights, shadows of all the people inside dancing the night away. you grew nervous, but you told yourself you couldn’t let that stop you.

the music was much louder inside. you weren’t expecting to see so many people crowded into one home. many were dancing, bodies touching each other, red solo cups containing beer and vodka in their hands. off in the distance, on the far side of the house, you could see people smoking. there were probably people in the bathrooms getting high. you wondered what you had agreed too. with the exception of everyone actually being of age, at least as far as you could tell, and there being alcohol, everything else was illegal. if cops were called, if someone so much as complained about loud noises in the neighborhood, the cops were going to be called.

“cheer up, y/n.” minhee yelled into your ear. “don’t worry.”

“there’s so many things that could go wrong.”

minhee simply grabbed your hands and pulled you towards the kitchen where the drinks were being concocted and served. you immediately grew nervous.

minhee grabbed you a drink. she playfully warned you that she wasn’t sure what was in it, but you didn’t hesitant to take a large gulp. the unknown substance burned in the back of your throat. but it was nothing that you weren’t used to.

soon, it was one drink, and then two drinks. and then three drinks. this was all to make you feel better. you were telling yourself over and over as if you were still trying to convince yourself.

you shouldn’t be doing this. it was unhealthy. you felt like you were just being dramatic, and minhee was growing more and more worried about you. she could not recall a time when you seemed this upset. she could tell you were trying to get rid of something, a feeling, a person, just something that was painful. and she has never seen you go this far.

suddenly, the crowd around you and minhee grew louder.

“yeah!!! woo!!” followed by clapping.

you gulped. “what is that?”

minhee shrugged, turning around to see what the crowd was cheering and clapping at. her thinking didn’t last long when they started to cheer a particular band name.

minhee’s head almost got whiplash from how fast she had looked at you. your face had paled, and you were already reaching for another drink. minhee questioned whether she should get you stop drinking, or at the very least, get you out of here.

it was too late though.

the crowd coincidentally parted just enough for one member of the band. he happened to turn, trying to look at everyone, and he recognized you instantly. he could only see your side profile as you chugged down another cup, but he knew it was you. you were practically drowning in alcohol.

minhee noticed too. she quickly grabbed your shoulders, pulling you away from the makeshift bar. you whined, but were far too weak to fight against her. especially when, for once, minhee had hardly drank, she was next to sober.

“what?” you slurred.

“jungkook.” she yelled into your ear.

you looked at her. “who?” you gave her the impression that you hadn’t noticed yet.

she rolled her eyes. “jungkook. he’s here.”

you started to laugh. “why would he be here?”

“i don’t know.” she replied shrugging, looking around for him. he had disappeared.

minhee wondered if you wanted to see him. after all, she did not know anything about what was going on between you two, and she hadn’t thought that the reason you were acting this way was because of him. she thought you would have been excited, but you seem to be angry.

you shook your head. “no. i don’t want to see him.”

finally, minhee wanted to press you for answers. “why?”

“he doesn’t love me anymore.” you were pulling her back towards the drinks.

minhee was confused. there was no love like your and jungkook’s love. “what do you mean?” your best friend tried to pull you away once again. no more alcohol for you.

“he’s always away. he’s always leaving me alone.” you finally said. “then he hardly even talks to me. he hardly calls or texts, claims he’s busy, promises that he’ll be home soon.” you sighed, not bothering to fight against minhee anymore. “i understand that his career is taking off, that he’s becoming more popular, and i’m extremely proud of him. his dream is coming true.” your voice cracked simultaneously with minhee’s heart. tears were threatening to fall, if they haven’t already. “but i miss him. i feel so neglected. i caught with another girl once. of course, nothing was going on between them but it still hurt. he’s never home and then when i sought him out, he’s with someone else.”

minhee listened intently. although it was a little hard every time you accidentally slurred your words together. she could hear the pain in your voice.

“i thought that tonight, maybe i could drown my pain, my thoughts, to let go and not be so annoyed by him. i feel like i’m being dramatic.”

minhee shook her head. “no, no, your feelings are valid, y/n.”

you shook your own head, bringing your hands up to cover your face. “i just get so angry at him, and then i get angry at myself.”

your thoughts were endless.

“maybe, we were never meant to be.”

there. you said it. you finally said it.

“maybe we’ve been trying too hard. maybe we were just supposed to be a short fling, one one night stand. but then it became two and three and four. we do love each other, i know that. but maybe, maybe we are just not supposed to be together. there’s so many things stopping us.”

minhee didn’t know what to say. she wanted to comfort you so badly, but she was at a loss for words. this was why you were trying to drink every single bottle on the table. this was probably why you had called her in the first place. you were hurting, and didn’t know how to deal with it. you wanted to forget it all, to ease the pain.

but minhee was conflicted. she understood your feelings, but she thought that you and jungkook were meant to be. so he could communicate more and put more effort into seeing you, but he was always coming back to you in the end. she wondered how jungkook felt during this thing. did he even know? was he feeling the same thing?

suddenly, she caught sight of him. “speaking of the devil,” she mumbled, gaining your attention again.

you met her eyes, following the direction she was looking in, and noticed jungkook. he seemed confused, worried even, at the sight of you. so minhee hadn’t been lying, not that you thought she was. you just thought that she saw someone like him. but no, jungkook was there, and he was coming straight towards you.

suddenly, you were angry again.

you pulled away from minhee, rushing towards the table of drinks. you grabbed a bottle and poured it into a new red solo cup. you chugged it down, clenching your jaw afterwards. why were you being like this? this was so unlike you…

then you turned around. you headed in the opposite direction, stumbling around, bumping into numerous shoulders and chests and backs. you attempted to apologize to them all but your head was a jumbled mess. was your vision beginning to look fuzzy, or has it been like that for a while? who were these people? what were you even doing? where were you going?

just then, you bumped into someone, and your chest instantly felt cold. your shirt clung to your chest. you gasped and stumbled to a stop. you looked at who had spilled their drink of you, and recognized hoseok. he seemed surprised. “y/n?”

you felt a tear escape, sliding down your cheek. you looked down, seeing that your shirt was soaked with some orange-yellow color liquid.

“i’m so sorry, y/n.” you heard hoseok’s voice.

before you could reply, gently hands were reaching for your shoulders, sliding down to a spot just above your elbow. you were being pulled away from hoseok, stumbling backwards into someone’s chest. “is she okay?” hoseok asked.

“i-i don’t know.” it was jungkook.

you tried to get a glimpse at his face, but he kept you facing forward. jungkook led you to the stairs of the house, guiding you gently. he coaxed you with each step. as you ascended, you noticed the difference in the amount of people. almost everyone was downstairs, with the exception of the few that passed by, exchanging glances with you. you were embarrassed with yourself. why were you acting this way? there was no point to it. and look at where you had gotten yourself into.

finally, jungkook found a nearby bathroom. he turned on the light, pushed you inside, and closed the door behind you. he made sure it was locked before finally facing you. you were afraid to meet his eyes. the bathroom was larger than most, seeing as you were at a rather large house, but it still felt claustrophobic. the atmosphere between you and jungkook felt different, heavier, like something was hanging in the air, like something needed to be said, but no one would dare say it.

after a long, silent minute, jungkook walked towards the sink. he grabbed the washcloth that was on the side. he turned on the sink and waited for the water to warm before wetting the washcloth. then, he hesitantly turned towards you. he wondered if he should do it, or if you were capable of doing it yourself. but you seemed distant, eyes swollen, cheeks flaming red, shirt soaked… he sighed, feeling guilty. he had never seen you this way. after all, you didn’t necessarily like drinking alcohol, at least that was his impression of you.

finally, he allowed himself to move towards you. you didn’t flinch or move away. you allowed him to drag the warm, wet washcloth over your neck, washing off the almost dried alcohol. you felt gross and sticky because of it, and your shirt was annoying you.

jungkook was unsure of if he should speak. he had a lot to say, an apology for not speaking to you. he wanted you to know that you hadn’t left his mind for one second, he was always thinking of you.

the man next to you, who you were so in love with, was gentle as he cleaned you up. you were feeling guilty yourself, wondering who was going to speak first. or, if this was going to be your last encounter with him.

with that thought, tears sprung in your eyes once again. you looked down, and just as jungkook pulled the washcloth away to refold it, you felt yourself sitting down on the seat of the toilet. you inhaled, filling your lungs with air as an attempt to calm yourself down. “i’m sorry…” you whispered, voice shaking.

jungkook’s eyes whipped to you. he dropped the washcloth into the sink. he turned towards you, head swarming with words, thoughts, emotions. but all he could bring himself to do was to crouch down in front of you and pulled your head into his shoulder.

feeling his skin against your own, his warmth, feeling jungkook was something that you needed. you broke down into his arms. “i miss you.” you mumbled into the nape of his neck. “i miss you so much.”

jungkook felt his own eyes become glassy, tears threatening to fall. he gently stroked your hair, wanting to take away all the pain he has caused you.

“you don’t talk to me anymore. you’re gone for weeks, and hardly send me a message.” you took in a breath, inhaling the scent of his cologne. “i couldn’t help but wonder… what if we’re not meant to be?” jungkook’s hold on you tightened. “maybe we weren’t supposed to be together for this long.”

jungkook shook his head. “no, that’s not true.”

“jungkook, i understand, okay? your dream of being a singer is finally coming true. you had a bright future ahead of you, and it’s okay if i’m not supposed to be in it, okay? i understand, it’s okay.”

he pulled away. jungkook cupped your face, wiping the tears away with his thumbs. god, you missed him.

you were surprised to see that he was crying too. you didn’t want to hurt him. no matter how angry you got, how upset you got, you hadn’t meant to hurt him. you had let your thoughts get the best of you.

“y/n, i don’t think you understand just how much you mean to me. i know that i’m not the best person, starting with that girl.” why was he bringing up her? “she knew you were in my life, i had told her all about you, and she continued to flirt, i just didn’t do anything about it. and then i started to get recognized, and our schedule became filled with performances and parties, i should have told you.” he sighed. “i’m sorry for hurting you for so long. i had no intention to, and i know i should have said something, or made more of an effort to talk to you and see you. trust me, not once did you ever leave my mind, y/n. i was always thinking about you, you can ask the others.” he laughed a little, and your heart lightened seeing his smile, “they probably have an idea of how much i love you.”

you felt yourself blushing, a small smile forming with your lips.

“i have no excuse for treating you the way i did. i swear, i will make an effort. in fact,” he paused, the color of his cheeks reddening, “what if, well, if the band gets signed to a label, what if you came with me? to wherever the road takes us. if we ever go on a tour, what if you came along? if we have to move to hollywood and la, what if you came with me?”

you were grinning now, all sadness and anger gone. you were shaking your head, yes, before your mind could even process what he was asking.

jungkook was smiling and pulling you off of the toilet seat, holding you tightly in his eyes. “i’m telling you, you are the love of my life.” he said into your shoulder. “if i ever do this again, don’t be afraid to tell me, hit me if you have to.”

“well, let’s hope that it never has to come to that.”

jungkook laughed once more before setting you down. he cupped your cheeks again, pulling your face closer to yours. to feel his lips on yours again, after having been deprived of him, made you feel complete. you needed him, and he needed you.

no matter how tough things got, you and him would always find a way back to each other. you thought that you and him weren’t meant to be, but it seemed that you were wrong. fate and love brought you and jungkook together. and nothing was going to tear you apart.

“hello? y/n? jungkook?”

you jumped, feeling a small string of annoyance in your heart at whoever had just interrupted this sweet moment.

jungkook smiled shyly. “i think that’s your friend.” he whispered into your hair.

jungkook did not let go of you. if anything he pulled you closer, kissing the side of your head just above your ear. you unlocked and opened the door, feeling giddy and shy, and slightly embarrassed. minhee was on the other side, hoseok standing behind her. “so, everything is going okay?” minhee asked.

you shook your head.

“because just a minute ago you were crying your eyes out and just hearing your pain made me want to kill this guy.”

both you and jungkook looked at each other, smiling sheepishly. “sorry about that.” you said.

“sorry about your shirt.” hoseok said, changing the subject.

you had forgotten all about it. “oh, no worries. anyways, minhee, do you think your girlfriend would mind if i borrowed one of her shirts?”

jungkook shook his head suddenly, pulling you towards the door. “no need, we’re going home anyways.”

“we are?”

he nodded. “yep. you’re too drunk. maybe it’s best.”

“or maybe you just want to make up for lost time,” minhee suggested, lightly jabbing hoseok in the ribs.

your face heated up as you let jungkook pull you away from your friends. you didn’t object to what everyone was thinking, but the thought that everyone knew what jungkook had in mind was embarrassing.

nevertheless, that night was a wild ride, to say the least. but, it sealed a bond between you and jungkook that could never be broken. you and jungkook’s love was unlike any other.

#bts #bts boulangerie #bangtan #bangtan sonyeondan #bts jeon jungkook #bts jungkook #jeon jungkook #jungkook #bts one shot #bts imagine #bts scenario #bts fluff #bts angst #bts au #kpop

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lordseochangbin · 4 years

Text

sunshine- han jisung

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

even in a noisy city, do whatever you want, sit in the sunshine and close your eyes, look at me for a second

a/n: hi guys!! this is fluff <33 levanter came out :O what’s your fav song on the album? mine is sunshine hehe but they’re all bops !!

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

ever since their concert had ended, jisung along chan and changbin have been working inside of the la studio. it was their second day and they realized their hotel room was a waste considering the three of them were practically living in the small space.

“come on jisung, changbin! lets just go to the room we can’t stay here the whole week” Chan suggested, nudging jisungs shoulder

changbin got up, his expression exhausted and his eye bags dropping low. “yeah i think it’s time we get a little rest, the couch isn’t that comfortable”

“ok we’re both going, how about you jisung?” the hyung asked his younger.

jisung looked up from his little notebook filled with scribbles and words for future songs. “nahh ima finish this one song, a little worried about how the music will play out” jisung replied, rubbing his sleepy eyes. after a little protesting, chan allowed jisung to stay the night alone- only under a cared for supervision however.

there you were, walking down the lobby with three folders and an empty stomach. you weren’t able to leave because of the crowd outside and it was tiring trying to push them out of the way to get inside your own workplace.

you knew there were these boys from some kpop band recording, but you didn’t realize how good looking they were until you saw two of them walking towards you, their eyes glowing as they saw your name tag.

“hey..” the blonde boy said, “y/n? one of my mates upstairs, his names jisung, he’s gonna pull an all nighter here again. do you think someone can stay with him?”

your eyes furrowed in confusion, what kind of guy would stay up to work on songs? none of the company’s original artists have done this before.

“hmm, no one usually stays this late” you watched as the elder looked at the other boy with jet black hair, both of them looking exhausted from the rough nights.

“is it okay if i stay?” you offered, a smile forming on both the boys faces as they nodded in agreement. “that would be awesome!! by the way, im chan and this is changbin. the boy upstairs is jisung” the boy introduced.

a few seconds passed before chan could eagerly take out his wallet and hand a hundred dollar bill.

“here, take this in case he gets hungry!! it’s for you two” the boy smiled before leaving you in awe at who could be waiting upstairs.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

you remained downstairs until the last person left, noticing that the elevators never budged and there was no sign of anyone in the building. it was only after awhile that you realized jisung was still here. curious of what kind of guy he would he’d be to work so late, you made your way to the elevator and minutes later at the front of their studio door.

*knock knock* “anyone in there?”

you heard the immediate bass of music stop inside the room before the door knob could click open. the boy took his swivel chair and returned back to his place in front of the mixing table. “you’re jisung right? your friends-”

“my friends asked you to watch me huh?” he turned his chair to face you, “no need, I am perfectly fine, y/n” he winked before you could hear a small grumble from what seemed to be jisung.

his face was priceless, his cheeks turning pink as he covered his jummy (j+tummy) with his hands in embarrassment.

“are you sure about that?” you said, a laugh quickly escaping your lips.

“okay, okay. in my defense i haven’t eaten anything since yesterday night”

“yesterday night? are you crazy? let’s order something to eat”

jisung turned his chair back to his laptop, “no worries y/n, I’ve got this”

you walked up to jisung, nudging his shoulder. “please” you pouted with a baby-like tone. “i’m really hungry, like im starving.”

after a few trials of begging, jisung finally complied making you two argue over a restaurant.

“come on! chinese or japanese jisung make up your mind!”

“but both of these looks so good” he was staring into the picture reviews of each restaurant with squirrel-like eyes in amazement.

“i swear to god…”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

you went downstairs to grab the food, stuffing the noodles into your face in seconds. both you and jisung were starving and you couldn’t help but notice the way he stuffed his food in his cheeks. it was adorable, almost as if you could hear *nom nom* coming from his mouth in a pretty baby voice. it made your blood rush to your cheeks now painted rose red from all the blushing.

jisung quickly finished his dinner, turning back to the laptop as he brushed his hair through his fingers. “ok back to work!” he exclaimed.

“are you kidding me?” you said, now standing in between him and his desk. “youve been working for three days, can’t you just rest?” you protested

“y/n...” he whispered, taking your hand in his in a sarcastic matter. you weren’t caring for jisung, if anyone was in this situation you tell them they’re crazy. sleeping is much needed in your opinion. “im actually fine. chan hyung can do it, i can to”

“that’s great!” you exclaimed sarcastically, “but you’re in Los Angeles, LA for pete’s sake! isnt there anything you wanna do here?! youve been in this room since you finished your concert or whatever you’re here for” jisung looked at you with a sense of gratefulness in his eyes.

it was as if he’d never met someone so caring, someone that could read his inner thoughts. it was 5am, way past bed time and you had stayed here for him. eating dinner as late as you possibly could and napping on the uncomfortable couch with blankets that you brought with you.

“im sorry y/n” he shook his head in disappointment, “we just need one more song for our upcoming album and there’s so much going on in my head that i can’t even process it”

“maybe you just need a break.” you suggested, “you’re seriously suffering from tmt (too many thoughts aka an skz song for those who don’t know lmfao)”

“tnt?” he replied back as if he misheard, “yeah i must be seriously mindblown” jisung leaning back against his chair to hold himself back from laughing so hard

“are you serious? that was funny to you?” you replied, chuckling on your own as the boy failed to stop his laughter.

“im sorry im sorry i couldn’t help it. and to answer yes, theyre are some things i want to do in la”

you felt a sudden cling to heart. even knowing jisung for a few hours he already seemed to mean something to you and you’d do anything he asked.

“like...” you eyebrows rose in curiousity

“the sunrise. i really wanna see the sunrise”

“really?!” you jumped in excitement, running over to grab your blankets. “it’s 6:15 let’s go!! it’s close to time”

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

when jisung remained in his seat you grabbed his hand, dragging him to the company buildings rooftop. his hand still in yours, you laid out the blankets on the floor as he sat down next to you. “sorry, i only have one” you apologized as jisung shivered from the cold. you sat closer to him, wrapping the blanket around you two as you slowly put his hoodie on.

your heart beat ran as fast as a rocket, speeding as jisung rested his head on his shoulder. for the remaining minutes before the sun rose the two of you settled on some random discussion about music, realizing you two had the same taste.

“look, the suns rising” you whispered into jisungs ear.

jisung’s eyes could only glow in amazement. the sunrise was beautiful, just like the girl next to him he thought.

and the unfamiliar place jisung felt he didn’t belong in started to feel like home. even at night when all you could hear was the la traffic, all you could see was the hollywood sign, and all you could feel was the chilled wind- he found a home in you. his thoughts flew out the window like a paper airplane, in exchange they let in the bright warmth feeling of love in itself. when it was dark out, you were here for jisung, staring right into his eyes as he cleared his mind. you were the reason why his pupils didn’t dilate in the dark, the reason why he stayed warm in the cold, the reason why he grew during all the seasons— you were, his sunshine.

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

bitches be writing soft imagines for jisung before finals week. that’s me. im bitches. i really am growing a soft spot for jisung. ty for writing a song i could relate to so much.

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tiannarosetarot · 4 years

Text

Wonho Current Energy Reading - June 29th

Very long reading ahead, but I hope you’ll check it out!

There is a lot going on, yet at the same time things feel very balanced. Wonho has just announced his new fandom name and has made his first vlive. This already feels like he has passed over the first major hurdle. He’s been slowly climbing back up from basically rock bottom. Ever since that terrible day in October, he is rebuilding his image, his self esteem and his career. He’s been holding back quite a bit, reasonably so, but I’ve thought since the beginning that when he makes a vlive, that’s when we’ll know. His vlives are extremely special to Monbebe and he has always used the platform to share his life with us and bring us along on his journey. I know that now that he is comfortable enough to go live with us again, he has passed that difficult checkpoint, and will hopefully be able to do it a lot now. It’s kinda like when a couple first confesses that they love each other. At first it is scary and awkward, and they’re not sure whether they should say it. But once they do, now they’re able to say it all the time to each other. I think vlive is Wonho’s way of saying ‘I love you’. And if he’s afraid we might not say it back, that will be extremely harmful to him. I think he needed to wait until he felt comfortable enough that we would reciprocate his feelings. Throughout this process there has been a lot of negativity and people attacked him for something he didn’t even do. So the fact that he feels strong enough to show himself to us again in the way he used to is incredibly special.

Wonho also used this vlive as a way to announce his fandom name with us, which is Wenee. I’m a little worried, because I see a lot of people who aren’t super happy with the name. I’ll admit that it seemed a little strange at first, but after knowing the backstory behind it, I know that it will become super special to us, as he pushed for this name himself. In order to make sure that Wonho feels ready and comfortable to fully come back, we need to make sure that we’re sending positive energy and messages towards him. He is a pretty sensitive person (which is a good thing), but I know that in the past he has sometimes taken negative comments to heart. It is important that we project into the universe what we want to happen. Whether you believe in this stuff or not, there is some truth that if you try really hard for something to happen, it definitely can. So let’s make sure Wonho doesn’t think we don’t like his choices, or he may stop trusting in his abilities. Let’s trust that he knows what he’s doing and can make his own decisions. We are his fans, and it is our job to support him in what he does. To reiterate this once again, the fact that he released a fandom name is much more important than what the name actually is. It means he is moving in the right direction to coming back into the industry. Even if you wish he were back in Monsta X, let’s trust in his new achievements now and worry about that later. Just because he’s becoming a solo artist doesn’t mean the chance of him coming back is completely off the table. And again, hopefully we realize that it is better to have him back in the music industry even without being part of Monsta X, than not have him back at all.

Now onto the cards ~

There is a new start for Wonho coming. He needs to work on his insecurities in order to achieve his dreams, because these things may be holding him back from doing so. There is also this feeling that he doesn’t really want to move on. He’s a little stuck in the past, wishing things were back the way they were. He is missing the group activities and the family he has been a part of for so long. But I think he’s finally realizing that the rest of the members are going to be okay without him. Wonho left because he wanted them to still be successful, and I know that he’s been hyping them up with all of their projects. He can trust now that they are doing fine, and take that as a positive sign that he can move forward. He needs to not let his past hold him back from achieving his dreams. He can remember that part of himself, all of the beautiful memories they shared together, without needing to stay in the shadows forever. We can think of this like any other idol who takes on a solo project or album. They work on promoting that for a while, and still can do group projects as well. Although Wonho may not be in the group right now, there is still a chance that could happen in the future. I know a lot of people have given up, which is totally fine, but I do still believe that he could come back somewhere in the future, and to not give up on those dreams just yet. He needs to not allow the hope of that return stop him from moving forward in his life. He needs to take care of his needs and keep fighting for his dreams.

There is a lot of fire energy in this reading, including a lot of Aries energy. I’m definitely feeling a lot of movement and power coming from this; he is taking back control. Things are happening quite quickly but no longer in a negative way, because he is taking the reins. Things are happening at the right speed for him now. It’s as if he has been using all of this time to sort everything out and now that those things have happened (New Moon in Cancer: he trusts Monsta X is okay, and South Node: he is not letting his past stop him from moving forward) he is able to finally take action. I have a strong feeling that things will all start falling into place now that he has made his vlive and announced the fandom name. Everything has been building up to this moment, and now rather quickly, things will start working out the way they are supposed to. It’s kinda a roller coaster. After leaving Monsta X, he dropped down to the ground. He’s been slowly inching his way back up to the peak, but with a lot of anticipation and maybe some anxious energy. But once he reaches the top he sees where he needs to go. He’s on top of the world again. And he can now soar down the steep track and enjoy the ride; as all of that pent up energy is being released. (I know Wonho hates heights so maybe this isn't the best analogy, but roller coasters are meant to be fun and exciting. I really want to emphasize that this isn’t like he’s reached the top and it’s only downhill now. This is a super exciting drop that will allow him to really set everything in motion.

The New Moon in Aries card is a big sign for him to be able to achieve anything he puts his mind to. He may still have a long way to go on this journey (Aries is the first sign of the zodiac), but he’s definitely getting there. He is making sure he does things correctly this time, and he is taking all the time he needs to really make sure he’s ready. He wants to figure out the logistics so that he can be able to have it easier later on. The only problem with this is that he might get so tied up into making everything perfect that he never actually takes action. But seeing that he released his fandom name shows that is not the case, and I hope this strategy works well for him. I think he has a really good foundation which will allow him to grow into an amazing artist again, so we need to be patient in his efforts. He knows what he is doing.

I’m really glad that the Justice card came up in this reading. This whole situation has been based around a legal matter, an accusation that Wonho did something unethical. However he has been proven innocent and has been given a second chance. Through this card, we are reminded that justice does prevail. Love does win, and people who do the right thing will come out on top. Maybe not always, and maybe not often either, but Wonho worked way too hard to have this all taken away from him so quickly. So the fact that he’s coming back just proves that things are working the way they are supposed to, and that hopefully there is a change happening in the kpop industry. I want to point out a quote from this card which says “Even though events in our life may seem unjust, there is a divine order to the universe.” This reminds me a lot of Wonho’s situation. This whole time we’ve been thinking that what happened to him was unfair, but maybe there is some reason why this happened. There is a hope that can be found in this card, that this event will only make him, Monsta X, and Monbebe stronger. This card can also symbolize weighing all sides before making an important decision, which I do think is what he is doing. It is important he thinks this all through before taking any big risks he might regret later.

The Three of Cups reversed represents overindulgence or an attempt to escape from the unpleasant aspects of life. It could also represent alone time and independence. The upright version of this card represents the opposite; celebration, friendship, community. Wonho is starting out on his own after being part of a group for so long. He has the opportunity to make many more decisions now and get a lot closer to the fans. He has a newfound independence that could have negative and positive aspects to it. He could be enjoying all of this freedom, but he may be overwhelmed in the amount of things he has to do. It’s no longer all being split between 7 members and in the kpop world, solo artists normally have to work harder to become and stay popular. I also sense a loneliness, and a possible emptiness that he’s feeling going through the steps again of things like announcing a fandom name, and eventually a debut, comeback stages and maybe someday his own concerts. In the past he experienced all of these major moments with his members, but he’s venturing out on his own now. He needs to remember that he still has his fans by his side, and therefore he isn’t truly alone.

This situation really is like he’s starting all over again though. He’s relearning how to do all of these things that he may not have done in a while. I could tell he was slightly out of practice trying to do aegyo today. I think he’s trying extremely hard to learn everything he can. He’s been learning English and Japanese, maybe other languages too. He’s been taking his time to make sure he makes careful decisions. He’s really being like the apprentice in the Eight of Pentacles, working hard through repetitive tasks and using keen attention to detail in order to master his craft. The second time around, he has the opportunity to do things with more ease and enjoy the moments that he may have been too nervous during the first time around. I’m really proud of how hard he is trying lately to better himself, and feel even more inspired by him than normal. He doesn’t want to disappoint, and I know that anything Wonho releases will only be after extreme thought and with thorough execution so I really hope that we can see that.

I’m so happy to be a Wenee now, and I want to say happy birthday to my fellow new fandom! Although I’ve been with many of you before, we need to get used to the fact that there will be new Wonho fans who have not known him as a member of Monsta X. I hope we can accept them into this family because the people I’ve grown to know through Monsta X are some of the most amazing people ever. I’m so proud to be part of these two beautifully intertwined fandoms and I can't wait to see what happens in the future. Don’t give up on hoping and be patient for what Wonho as well as the universe has prepared. I believe it will to be even better than anything we could’ve imagined.

#wonho #wenee #tarotreading #tarot reading #kpop tarot

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kpopficsincorporated · 5 years

Text

NK (New Kid)

Pairings: Bang Chan x reader, Jimin x reader

Genre: Fluff, Angst, Romance

Words:2390

-a/n: wow I posted. this is a miracle, you have no idea. Also, Baby Jay is getting a surprise soon <3 -admin Sam

Prologue, Ch.1, Ch.2, Ch.3, Ch.4, Ch. 5, Ch. 6

Chapter 2

You didn’t realize you’d be this nervous to meet Jungkook. What if he actually told everyone who you were? That was always a possibility and then you wouldn’t be able to finish school and it would be a mess. You only had about three full semesters left.

“Hey, I’m gonna be here the whole time. You know that once he signs that contract, he can’t say anything. You’re going to be okay, Y/N,” Chan reassured you, reading your mind. He was sitting on the couch next to you, leaving the rolling chair – that was usually at his desk – for Jungkook to sit in.

You released a deep sigh. “I know you’re right; I really do. But that doesn’t mean my overactive, anxiety riddled brain does,” you offered a smile. Chan chuckled lightly, placing a hand on your back to calm you. Chan started to reply, but there was a small, timid knock at the door interrupting him.

“Dude, you didn’t have to knock so nervously,” Bam laughed, charging into the room with Jungkook following awkwardly behind him. “Hey guys. Jungkook, this is Chan – the leader of Stray Kids. And this is NK.” Bam Bam moved around, showing Jungkook who you were.

You offered an awkward wave. “Hi.”

He bowed deeply, causing Bam Bam to laugh. He slowly stood up straight, keeping his eyes on the floor.

“Okay, first things first. Please, don’t be formal with me,” you laughed as well. “Technically, you’re the senior and we’re supposed to be formal with you.”

“No, please, don’t be formal with me. We’re all the same age, right?”

You nodded and he smiled in relief. Jungkook sat in the chair Chan pointed to when he looked around, unsure of where to sit. Bam Bam said his farewells and left the room.

“Alright, now that all the weird stuff is out of the way, let’s start.” You explained in detail what the contract entailed. You let him know that if he wanted to tell his members, it was fine, but if for any reason one of them leaked information, the blame would fall to him and he’d be held responsible. You also gave him a separate contract for his company president to sign. It was to ensure that the Big Hit staff stayed silent on your identity as well.

“Unfortunately, it’s JYP policy that I take 15% of whatever earnings this song or whatever we work on gets. I, personally, don’t want any money. I’m still doing well after Jackson’s song. He forced me into taking 15% from the entire album instead of just my song.”

“We had to force her to say yes and stop her from putting money in his pockets when he wasn’t looking,” Chan laughed as he spoke to Jungkook for the first time. Jungkook laughed as well.

“So, you wouldn’t be too terribly happy if I tried to give you 20% instead,” Jungkook joked as he relaxed in his seat.

“You do it, and you’ll be finding money hidden among your things,” you huffed out. Jungkook and Chan chuckled at your response. Jungkook conceded to the 15%, and everything else that was in the contract. He’d take the other contract to the company and come back when it was signed as well.

“It was really nice meeting you NK-“

“Y/N, please.” He smiled.

“It was really nice meeting you, Y/N. Chan.” With that he left the room and you instantly deflated in your seat.

“I didn’t think that’d go as well as it did,” you mumbled from your position beside Chan. You slumped over, resting your head on his shoulder and linking your arms around his. His other hand came up to move your hair out of your face and tuck it behind your ear.

“He seems like a genuine guy. I think this will be good.”

“Do you think NK’s fans will like this? Do you think that BTS’ fans will like this?” you voiced the worries that had been plaguing your mind since you spoke on the phone with Jungkook yesterday.

“I don’t think Jungkook is the type of person to work with someone that’d hurt either of your images. Maybe you should look on social media and see if you share fans. Maybe that’s why he deemed it okay to work with you. He seemed like a really big fan of yours.”

You quickly dig your phone out of your pocket and hand it to him. “Here, you check.”

His fingerprint had already been saved in your phone, along with face recognition, so you didn’t need to unlock it for him. He opened up twitter, searching your name as a hashtag along with BTS as a hashtag. You refused to look at the phone as he searched through the feed. Your curiosity only began to grow when you heard him chuckle to himself.

“Listen to this ‘I swear if NK doesn’t work with BTS, I’m throwing the whole KPOP universe out of the window,” you giggled at that, peering over at your phone in Chan’s hands.

“I guess I can take that as a good sign?” you asked hopefully.

“You can. This will definitely be good, Y/N.” He pulled you in for a comforting hug and your worries seemed to seep from your body. You had always relied on Chan, and you had always harbored a small crush on him. He made it so easy to like him. He was always there for you, even when you didn’t think he would be.

Chan had proven time and time again that he was trustworthy and that he genuinely cared about you.

“So these are the studios.” Jungkook was leading you through his company, showing you where things were along the way. It took him one day to bring back the contracts. You had taken them to JYP, and everything had been finalized within the day. You had met Jungkook a total of three days ago, and you were already starting on his song.

“This is Golden Closet.” He stopped at a door, turning away from you to open it.

“This is so nice,” you exclaimed, following him. He pulled a folding chair from behind his shelf and set it out for you to sit in.

“We’re meeting in here first to go over the song. I don’t want start recording yet,” he explained as he took a seat as well. He handed you a sheet with lyrics to look over and learn, then turned to his computer and played the melody that he had worked on.

“That sounds really good, Jungkook. And these lyrics are really good as well – they are super personal. I’m sure your fans are going to love it.”

He raised his hand to the back of neck in embarrassment, blushing at your statement. “Thank you.”

“I’ve already voiced my worry to Chan, but I want to hear what you think,” you started, sitting up straighter in your seat. “Do you think your fans will like me doing this type of song with you?”

“What do you mean?” he asked, confused.

“Like I said, these lyrics are super personal. And I know what your fans mean to you. I’m a fan of BTS as well. I just don’t want to hurt you or your member’s images in anyway by doing something that your fans wouldn’t like.”

“We could easily find out right now. If it’s okay with you, I can tweet out about maybe working with you and see what they think,” he said quickly, taking his phone out. “And I don’t think you could ever hurt our image, but I respect you for having these types of worries. I can tell you genuinely care about us. So thank you.” He offered you a smile as he looked down at his phone and opened the app. He quickly typed in a tweet and showed it to you.

‘ARMY!! Hi~ How would you guys feel if I did a song with NK? I’m a really big fan of her voice and was wondering if you guys would like to hear something like that?’

“Is this okay with you?” he asked in consideration. You smiled in consent and he posted the tweet. “If you want, we can wait for their responses before we start working on anything.”

“I would really appreciate that, Jungkook. Thank you.”

As he was putting away his phone, there was a knock at the door. “One second,” Jungkook said. “Here, Y/N. You take my seat. My studio is a little small.”

You did as he said, and he put away the chair you were sitting in. You didn’t think Jungkook would be as nice as he was, but he kept surprising you. You were gradually becoming a bigger fan, and you had to admit your respect for him was growing as well.

He opened the door to his studio and was talking to whoever was outside. They were speaking in hushed whispers and you couldn’t make out what they were saying. Instead of eavesdropping, you decided to play a game on your phone when you noticed a text from Chan.

Chan: Hellooo. I’m on my way to get you now.

Chan: and I have a surprise for you <3

He could always bring a smile to your face so easily. You quietly packed up your phone charger in your purse that you had gotten out earlier, as well as the water you brought with you. When you looked back down, Chan had texted to let you know he was waiting for you.

You walked up to Jungkook and tapped his shoulder. When he turned around to look at you, you could see who he had been talking to.

RM and Jimin.

You quickly bowed in respect. “Hello. My name is NK.”

“It’s nice to meet you NK-“ RM started, but you quickly interrupted him.

“No, please. Call me Y/N.” You nervously corrected yourself. It wasn’t guaranteed that you’d answer to NK if he called out to you.

“Alright. It’s nice to meet you, Y/N. You can call me Namjoon,” he smiled in what seemed like hidden excitement. “And this is Jimin.”

You blushed before you averted your eyes to the ground, smiling. “I know. I’m a bit of a fan.”

“Really? You’re a fan of ours?” Namjoon asked, shocked.

“Of course I am!” You couldn’t help but look at him, smiling wider. You looked over to Jimin but was shocked to see that he was narrowing his eyes at you, a small frown on his face.

Your smile faltered, but you heard the ping of your phone that reminded you of why you interrupted their conversation in the first place. “Ah, Jungkook. Chan is waiting for me downstairs.”

“Already?” Jungkook whined, causing you to giggle.

“Yes. And apparently he has a surprise for me,” you said, barely able to contain your excitement. You had always loved surprises.

“Well, let’s go then. Do you guys want to walk with us?” Jungkook asked politely.

“Sure, that’s fine with me. Jimin?” Namjoon asked the bandmate beside him. Jimin only gave a small nod in answer. “So, Y/N. How did you start working with Jackson?”

You answered all of Namjoon’s questions as you made your way to the parking garage. He had so many, and he asked them so fast, you were laughing as you tried to answer them all. You couldn’t help but notice that Jimin was staring the entire time. It was the kind of stare that made you feel like he didn’t like you, like he was analyzing your every move. You’d never thought that meeting him would be like this.

“So, what are some of your favorite artists?” Namjoon asked as he held open the door to the garage. You were about to answer when you caught sight of someone you didn’t think you’d be seeing so soon.

“JACKSON!” you yelled, ignoring Namjoon in the process as you ran and jumped into your best friends arms.

You turned into a koala, as you latched your arms around his neck and your legs around his waist in a full body hug.

“Y/N!” he exclaimed as well as he hugged you back, placing a kiss on your cheek. Chan was smiling from where he stood by the van. “How is my princess doing?”

You leaned back, tears in your eyes and you took in his facial features. “Hey, why are you so skinny?” you asked indignantly.

“Me? What about you? Have you even been eating? You’ve lost so much weight! You’re so light now,” he avoided the question.

“Jackson,” you whined, knowing what he was trying to do.

“What if I was just waiting to have a nice big meal with you?” he asked as he set you down. “Maybe add in a movie? I was thinking a whole night in, just me and you.”

“I’d love to go on a date with you, but you’re still avoiding my question. Are you okay?” You asked, moving your arms to go around his waist so that you could still hold him.

“I’m fine, Y/N. Now, how about we have our date tomorrow night?”

“Tomorrow night? What are you doing tonight?” He twisted you around to his side so you were both facing the three BTS members. They all had somewhat shocked looks on their faces. The way you interacted with Jackson tended to do that to people.

“This evening, I’m hanging out with Joon,” he answered, looking down at you with a smile.

“Okay,” you conceded, but you didn’t hide your sadness.

“Come on, Y/N,” Chan called for you. You leaned up and kissed Jackson’s cheek as you left his side to instantly wrap your arms around Chan pitifully. Both men just laughed at your behavior, completely used to it by now.

“I promise that I’ll spend all of my time with you tomorrow night,” Jackson said as he walked backwards towards the other three boys.

You sighed loudly, turning out of Chans arms, and Chan grabbed your hand. “Okay. Bye Namjoon, bye Jimin. It was really nice to meet you guys. And bye Jungkook. Text me! I’ll be watching twitter to see the results,” you smiled.

You quickly followed Chan into the van, going back to his dorm to spend the night. “That was a really nice surprise. Thanks boo.”

“Your welcome, Y/N.”

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crescendochan · 5 years

Text

Riptide - A Kpop!Marvel AU (III)

Summary: In which you are a wanted vigilante and Stray Kids, one of S.H.I.E.L.D’s top rookie teams, needs you on their side.

Genre: Alternate universe, action/adventure, crime, fantasy, superhero, Marvel, dark!skz

Word Count: 1,309

Parts: If you want access to the other parts to this AU, just search up ‘riptide’ in my blog search :)

Notes: I watched Endgame yesterday and I am an inspired emotional wreck, which actually makes for some damn good writing, if I hype myself up enough lol.

Happy reading!

- Erin

“Fuck them,” Wooyoung complained, packing another hearty punch into the sandbag in the gym at ATeez’s headquarters. “They know your history, probably down to the name of your first childhood pet, and yet they try to convince you to join them? Bastards, every last one of them.”

You glanced over at him from where you were jogging on the treadmill across the room, careful to distribute your weight so as not to go tumbling off. “Agreed. But don’t you think their logic is a little bit... off? You’re right,” you paused to suck in a breath of air, “they’re fucking bastards for trying this in the first place, but they’re also complete idiots. I would be the last person to want to join S.H.I.E.L.D.”

Wooyoung nodded, starting to switch between kicks and punches, his super-speed appearing in bursts, making your head spin as you tried to keep up with his movements. “Y’know,” he said after a few moments of comfortable silence. “It’s a good thing you didn’t go with them.” The timer on the treadmill let out a series of beeps and you slowed your run down into a brisk walk, then to steps. You glanced over at your best friend once more as he bounced on the balls of his feet, cooling his muscles after his workout.

“And why is that? You’d miss me too much?” Wooyoung met your eyes as you walked over to him, and an exasperated look came over his features, although you could still see the amused glint in his fond gaze.

“Sure, whatever. I would still have San. But if they tried to convince you to leave, despite what they know, they were probably planning on killing you.”

You knew that full well. In fact, that possibility had been cycling through your mind since Chan and I.N had flown out of your window three days ago. Since then, ATeez had fallen back into its steady rhythm of going out on missions, having each others’ backs, and returning home to enjoy late dinners and reruns of old TV shows. You liked your life now, and no one was about to change your mind. “I’ve been thinking about that,” you admitted, plopping down onto the mat-covered floor, Wooyoung following suit. “Don’t worry, though. I’m not that oblivious.”

Your parents had sacrificed too much to keep you alive. Hell, it was a miracle that they had managed to even help you get away from the S.H.I.E.L.D raid on your home seventeen years ago. So what made those damn boys decide to come and get you now of all times?

“If you died, I wouldn’t know what to do with myself,” Wooyoung murmured, letting his arm press against yours as he moved closer, “When I found you passed out on the beach, I nearly lost my shit. Never scare me like that again, y’hear?” A laugh left your lips and you intertwined your fingers with his, resting your head on his shoulder, a familiar gesture. It wasn’t romantic, just... comforting.

“I wouldn’t dare.”

———

Chan’s head snapped sideways at the force of the slap.

“You let her get away?” Commander Park, his boss, barked, and his shoulders shrunk, just as they was accustomed to.

One day Chan would show him what he was truly capable of, and Commander Park would be sorry.

“My life was being threatened, sir, and if I died, I.N wouldn’t be strong enough to defend himself. ATeez is a band of highly trained assassins and enhanced alike, and as much as I hate to admit it, we wouldn’t be enough to hold them back.” He didn’t bother to raise his head, even when he heard the sharp footsteps of Commander Park approaching him. He didn’t bother to cry out when the kick was delivered to his stomach. The bruises there were still fresh, but while it had hurt like hell, he was strong.

He had to be.

“Get stronger, and make them stronger too. We must not fail. The system is faulty, and we will be the ones to fix it.” Chan knew this speech by heart after hearing it so many goddamn times, and he couldn’t help but wonder which time it would be when he finally broke.

“Understood, Commander.”

“Good.” Chan kept his head lowered as Commander Park stepped away, but when his phone started to ring, he glanced up. “It’s a video call. Stand up, boy, I can’t have him seeing you like this.” A glimmer of hope sparked in his heart at the mention of this person. Although he had gone unnamed, by the tone of his boss’s voice, Chan knew who was calling.

Commander Park pressed the Receive Call button, and then swiped the camera footage from his phone screen onto the TV in the conference room where Chan had been receiving his punishment.

There, on the screen in all his glory was Captain America himself. The sensation that coursed through Chan at the much welcome sight was one of awe, almost. Here was one of the famed Avengers, someone who Chan absolutely idolized. Here was someone who had fought aliens from space (Chan realized his thoughts had become much too redundant for his tastes, probably due to his shock), who had defeated an army of killer robots and their evil master. Here was a man who had fought them all and won.

But not alone. Never alone.

“Commander Park! You’re looking as spry as always,” Tony Stark’s voice rang out over the audio system, and Chan remained silent, despite the awkwardness slowly creeping in. “I see you have your... protege here as well. Uh, care to remind me what your name was again?” A jolt of surprise rocked Chan from his fingertips to his toes, it’s intensity only increasing as Iron Man himself waltzed into the frame, toting a bag of kale chips.

“Uh, hello, Mr. Stark sir. I’m Christopher Bang, but you can call me Chan. It’s an honor to see you again.” It was all Chan could do to keep the stutter out of his voice.

“Okay, pleasantries aside-“

“‘Pleasantries aside?’ I think you need to schedule your next physical, Rogers. Something isn’t working right in there,” Stark once again cut in to Captain America’s attempt to resume conversation, and Chan couldn’t help but smile.

Unfazed, Steve continued on, “I called-“

“We called!”

“Yes, we called to inform you of a new enhanced that’s floated into our radar-“

“Ha, floated. Look, the old man’s cracking jokes now!”

“But apparently she’s not affiliated with H.Y.D.R.A, or any other corporation we’ve come across recently. Romanoff’s checking archives as we speak, but I just wanted to know if you have any information on this case already.”

Chan froze. Of course they did. That was what had earned him the slap, their failure to retrieve the girl from that god-forsaken ATeez, or whatever they called themselves. Commander Park had actually severely injured Jeongin, the youngest on Chan’s team, just to sell the part, but of course, it only succeeded in making Chan hate his boss all the more.

“No, I’m truly sorry, Captain, but this is the first I’m hearing of this case. If anything comes up, you will be the first to hear of it,” Commander Park lied through his perfect straight white teeth that Chan wished with all his might he could just knock out of his mouth.

Steve Rogers smiled. “Drop the formalities, Commander. Call me Steve.”

Chan wanted to throw up.

“Steve it is,” Commander Park replied, smile somehow growing even bigger and even more forced, “It was a pleasure to talk to the both of you. Have a great rest of your day.”

“Same to you, Commander. Signing off.” With that, the screen went black, and Chan sunk back into one of the many desk chairs surrounding the conference table.

“Get. That. Girl.”

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danielxrk · 5 years

Photo

✞ TEAM F2 * POP VS KPOP MASHUP { lines & times }

( * mentioned, some very briefly: @rkheejin @rkxsungwoon @rkpjy @rkjeonghxn @jacksxnrk @rkyq @rkminhyun @hyojinrk @ericxrk @rkmason @rkeunji @rkkhg )

daniel has a bad feeling about these results. he wants to trust his and heejin's performance at the very least-- to believe that at the very least her superior vocal prowess carried him through, but as he's always said in this competition: nothing is guaranteed. no, he hopes they're in the top of the performances this time. he wants to taste it, at least once, and with heejin's voice and a performance he's proud of...why couldn't they be?

no, more than him, he's worried for empty enigma, and even with heejin beside him, without their hands to hold in the tension of impending results he feels...entirely alone-- empty, maybe, even though he knows they're still here. they're still in this together, and they're lucky for that, but they feel so far apart now. he didn't even get to see much of the others this week, everyone too preoccupied with their own performances to mingle together like usual. he's afraid the distance will only grow, and not with more performances, but with an elimination. daniel hopes he's wrong. he wants empty enigma to go to the end-- for a company to see their potential as a team and sign them together. that's the dream, but even for as idealistic as daniel is, he knows better than to expect it. at some point they just might push their luck past its limit.

he holds his breath as the top three are called, hoping (regrettably not praying; he should've) to hear the name of someone in empty enigma-- for one of them to finally be acknowledged for their efforts, but there's nothing. instead, he's surprised to hear that everyone called as part of the top three are performances he was silently critical of, and this comes with the sinking reminder that he really doesn't know anything at all. he is still an outlier in this industry, still so clueless and unadjusted, so misguided and...delusional. maybe he let one performance he was proud of get to his head, and suddenly, all of his confidence is gone.

he looks over at heejin, and he wants to say something comforting, but he can't find his voice, so he looks away again, staring at some point between his feet and the stage. he just doesn't want to send heejin home, and he doesn't want to see sungwoon go home either. he can make peace with everything else. he thinks he can. the first duo eliminated is no real blow to him, nor no real surprise to him either. he's sad to see jinyoung go, but jeonghan on the other hand...comes as a relief. he won't have to see him and his eyes boring into him any longer. he can accept the second as well, even though he wanted success for jackson, both of them returning from the first season of the mgas. (part of his feelings with moonbok resurface. who is he, to earn a position while they don't? he feels less of it thanks to heejin-- knows she deserves to stay, even if he doesn't.)

the third elimination is the kicker. his heart sinks, even though he felt this coming on. aside from the gutting that minhyun's elimination is, he's also confused. minhyun and yuqi's performance was probably daniel's favorite, and yet...? his earlier crisis is amplified; he's forced to reassess everything he thought he knew in this competition, and forced to confront the reality that empty enigma will not be getting signed together, and boy, daniel has always hated confrontation.

yet katie lee sparks that hope back up in him, only for daniel to snuff it out as soon as it appears, only so he isn't disappointed a second time. it's not for lack of faith in minhyun's ability to return to them, but for the need to prepare for the worst, and accept the current result. there are many people in this competition better than daniel, and some of them even better than his friends, if daniel is objective, and if today has proven anything, it's that his eye for talent is practically nonexistent. the judges' agenda vastly differs from his own, and he'd do well to only expect as much going forward.

he still stands when it's all over, and bows to heejin. aside from the difficult elimination results, it'll be difficult to part from her as well-- strange to fill his time practicing with someone else after the routines they've established. "i'm sure you'll do well next round. i already know you'll be top three. i'll be cheering for you."

then, he finds himself at minhyun's side, easily. he pulls him into a hug once everyone else is finished fussing over him, and stays there for a moment. "you did well," he mutters. "thank you for coming with me." he doesn't think he could've done this without all of empty enigma behind him-- all of them with him, and he knows he wouldn't want to even if he could. it took him a while to get used to minhyun on stage, and it took watching him here to realize he belongs there. he hopes minhyun realizes that now, too. if this is the end, daniel will miss seeing him there week by week, but he hopes there's more for them-- that this is a see you back on stage again soon.

he pulls away from the hug, hands still gripping minhyun's arms, and he grins at him. "do your best."

hyojin finds him soon after, and when the dust from the rest of it clears, he's really happy to be paired with him. hyojin is someone he already knows, albeit not very well; he has the unique experience of knowing how he is on stage too-- a rarity for daniel, aside from his bandmates and anyone he shared a stage with on the mgas. he isn't one to perform with others often, always one to keep to himself, though there have been a few times with close friends. even then, it's not really...out in public, like their spontaneous street performance of fear was. he still doesn't know what possessed him to offer to rap back then, other than to get more practice, but now, he thinks it might've just been fate, or at risk of sounding like a biblethumper, divine intervention. the holy spirit, or something. either way, he's positively sure crossing paths with hyojin again here is meant to be, and he intends to make the most of it.

he takes hyojin's extended hand and shakes it, firmly at first, and then a few times after, just to properly convey his excitement, grin wide. "we do! i had a feeling we would," and his smile becomes more mischievous. "let's do well!"

working with hyojin has none of the intimidation working with heejin did, and none of the safety net, either. with it is a desperation to do better. it's not that hyojin isn't talented, it's just that the judges haven't acknowledged either of them yet, and it leads daniel to believe they're fighting for mere survival more than a spot in the top three. it doesn't sit well with him, resigning to that much, but he doesn't want to set his expectations too high, especially with minhyun's elimination and his confidence in his knowledge here taking a hit.

with hyojin, he feels less fear in giving out suggestions, though he thinks both of them are similar, and it leaves some awkward moments that daniel finds something close to comical. he's sure they'll get used to each other in time; he likes hyojin, and he's excited to work with him.

but none of daniel's suggestions quite feel right. they either focus too much on himself or on hyojin, and there are too many options, like he's dug himself into a hole by refusing to pick between singing and rap. he's immensely indecisive, but he tries to paint it as a strength to hyojin even though it's likely very clear he's metaphorically pulling his hair out. hyojin still kindly offers his input, gently, and daniel grows to appreciate his insight and company even more. if there's one thing that's certain, it's their strength in instruments, and daniel finds comfort in this shared boon. it seems only fitting to make use of it. they play chords together, as if that'll bring some idea to mind, but even if it doesn't, daniel finds it reassuring-- good bonding, building of much needed team synergy going forward.

but really, when he's honest, there is something he's wanted to do from the start, he just hasn't mentioned it because he doesn't know how to get it done in actuality during this timeframe. still, it's where his heart and thoughts always end up, so he expresses it, knowing hyojin will gently turn it down if he thinks it's too difficult or unrealistic. "what about a mashup?" he says, and hyojin likes it, and daniel's expression brightens. "really?" and hyojin agrees, and daniel doesn't know what he did to earn two partners saying yes to his ideas in a row. he only hopes they'll pay off like they did last year.

this mutual agreement doesn't mean it's easy, because now is the matter of which songs to use, and daniel asks hyojin if he can speak english. daniel hasn't sung in english yet this season aside from his very first audition, and it seems like a side of himself he needs to show. hyojin, however, does not know english, and seems set on a kpop song, so...a dilemma, but one daniel solves without too much trouble. they're doing a mashup, right? so why not both?

they hit the ground running after that, and choose to split themselves, daniel searching for popular english songs that he'd like to include, and hyojin doing the same for kpop. when they come back together again, they settle on a key to transpose them all into, and throw out the ones that won't fit. they'll alternate between kpop and english, they decide, like it's a battle to see which one will turn out superior in the end, but they'll swap sides at the very end, evidence that all music should be enjoyed, regardless of language.

that's the concept, anyway. daniel doesn't know if it will translate well to the stage, but he hopes so, and as he and hyojin work on the instrumental to layer the chosen songs over, and settle the order, he's excited to bring it there.

the week's episode airs, and all of daniel's excitement and confidence wavers once again. youngjae's comment breaks him down-- makes him think about his own incompetence and his motives and everything he put off thinking about. of course it would come up. it makes sense, but somehow he hoped he could slip by without ever having to deal with it. a repeat. is this performance a repeat too? they plan to use their instruments, so maybe so. the mashup is different, though, and he hopes it's interesting enough to make anyone sharing youngjae's sentiments second-guess them.

so he does the only thing he can: pushes onward, and decides if he's going to go out for being repetitive, or a one trick pony, or there for the wrong reasons, it'll be doing what he wants to do. he's honest with hyojin about his troubles regardless, in case hyojin has his own doubts, though he's sure to skate around the details about why empty enigma are there. it's just that repeating becomes a theme-- repeating performances, repeating all of the negative comments in his head, repeating practice over and over. hyojin wants to do this just as much as daniel does, though however, so daniel vows to do his best. he's spent his entire life making his choices based on what others want for him, and their opinions, and this time...he doesn't want to care. this time, he'll show his true self, and give it everything he has, as he's done this entire season.

among it all, hyojin wants them to come up with a team name, and historically, daniel has been bad with this. both his first collaboration this season and last season didn't have a team name at all. still, he throws out some lackluster suggestions, hoping to god that hyojin will take this responsibility from him, and eventually, he does. "i don't know what boys over flowers is," he admits with a laugh, though maybe he heard his little sister talking about it. still, when he suggests f2, he likes it. "f2 is a chord!" and he grins. "it has two different meanings. i like that." they come up with an intro then, and daniel humorously cringes at hyojin's suggestion for it, but lets him have it. it's not so bad. "what if we play the f2 chord during it?" daniel adds, determined for both meanings to come across, and hyojin agrees. daniel perks up. not so bad at all.

he finds himself back in a familiar recording booth, and as before, he's willing to teach hyojin anything he wants to know about recording that he doesn't know already. by now, conversation flows easily, and he feels as confident in their budding friendship as he does their performance (which admittedly, still has it's lacking moments; that applies to both.) daniel records a little a little background bass, and gets the drum machine set for its appropriate parts, and hyojin records the driving snap beat for the earl parts. they decide to record a version of the full instrumental too, just in case. daniel makes sure hyojin's settings are the best they can be on all of the equipment when it's time for him to play the keyboard, and then records the acoustic guitar himself. all that's left is the finishing touches-- turning up the levels that are too quiet, and turning down the ones that dominate the track, and any final tiny instrument parts, and then all that's left to do is practice-- and then kill it, of course.

it's a familiar routine by now, and as such, the decreasing number of chairs doesn't shake daniel as much as it did before. it's still noticeable, however, and still a reminder that he's survived above so many others; he's both honored and confused. he knows he hasn't earned his place yet, but he hopes after today, he'll be one step closer.

he's equal parts terrified and in awe that minho is so close to him, and he stares longer than he should. he's sure to bow to him, multiple times, as he feels is appropriate, before they sit down. daniel is delighted to find sungwoon not so far away from him either, and in a verging on foolish act of bravery only sungwoon could inspire, leans forward and waves to him when he catches his gaze, even with eunji in between them, still unsure of where they stand. he always wishes sungwoon was closer, but if waving at him before performances begin must become a tradition, so be it. hyunggu takes a seat next to him too, and he's an extremely familiar face by now, so much so that daniel finds it easy to give him a smile and chat with him while everyone is getting settled when he isn't doing so with hyojin. even when performances begin, he does the same, splitting his attention between hyojin and hyunggu, this time happily caught between two (friends?) willing to converse to fill the transitions between performances. daniel is sure to only comment on anything if he has something positive to say, mindful of both his manners and likelihood to get evil edited given any out of place remark.

and boy, does he have a lot to say about minho, quelled into silence by the sheer power of all of his performances, as always. for a moment after they finish, his smile disappears, jaw clenched, expression equal parts subtle worry and underlying determination, but soon he smiles again, even if it's not entirely wholehearted. "tough act to follow," he admits to hyojin with a laugh, sounding free of nerves even though he's far from it. "we can do it," he decides, just as much for his own resolve as his partner's, and he pats hyojin on the back before they gather their instruments and take to the stage.

they set up at a slant, angled to face each other just enough to not alienate the audience or judges, a microphone stand each in front of them though they considered a single one to really drive home the sing-off aspect. instead, they opted for guaranteed sound quality, and so here they are, ready, standing in front of the judges. he says "f2!" along with hyojin, and plays the chord on his guitar with a big grin and slightly dramatic flair. "you're excited to see what we'll do next, right? i'm #5017, kang daniel!" and hyojin finishes off with his cheesy, albeit appropriate introduction. all that's left is to return to their spots, and he gives hyojin a single nod of assurance before they begin.

it starts off with about four measures of a guitar intro, courtesy of daniel, and he's in his element-- playing guitar as an accompaniment to a powerful voice, hyojin starting them off with boy with luv. daniel's contribution comes next, along with the introduction of their first simple beat.

thought i'd end up with sean but he wasn't a match wrote some songs about ricky now i listen and laugh

he could've changed the names in thank you next, maybe pulling a taylor swift and calling out his exes and the mess of his past relationships that he was still thankful for. in the end, he'd have to change all the lyrics to get the names to fit, so he decided to go with the original. part of his reasoning is that line about ricky, considering...he kissed a guy named ricky at the beginning of this year, and the aftermath has been...complicated, or at least it is in his head. he doesn't consider him and ricky anything close to exes, but it was...something, regardless, and he owes ricky the respect of not writing it off as much as he's inclined to. he doubts ricky will appreciate this reference, if he hears it, but daniel couldn't help but appreciate a good irony (coincidence) and couldn't resist including it. besides, thank you next is an iconic enough song to end up on this list without any reasoning, and he has written a song about ricky. maybe eventually they'll be able to listen and laugh. he sings the familiar "ohs" of boy in luv to finish out his verse.

they switch back to hyojin, singing a brief snippet of kill this love, previous beat replaced by that driving snap, and the ball is back in daniel's court all too quickly, with the return of the previous beat, and those intertwining ohs once again.

oh oh oh oh the club isn't the best place to find a lover so the bar is where i go me and my friends at the table doing shots drinking fast and then we talk slow

daniel didn't choose these songs based on lyrical content for the most part, just the ones he liked, and ones he thought were popular, since hyojin was worried about them suffering for choosing more unknown songs. however, he still feels he can relate in this, an ode to empty enigma (though squall at least has certainly found lovers in clubs) and the countless times they've gone out to get drinks, or followed up shows with them, all fond memories.

after the slow the beat becomes the same, and drops out in what is one of daniel's proudest moments of the production. he leans into it, and lit eads the into dalla dalla, and a harder drum beat, still layered over the snapping. now, he lends his voice to harmonize with hyojin's for the first time, the first evidence of their kpop and english pop worlds colliding, as they're meant to.

the beat builds up and drops down, beat more pressing, heavier bassline, and daniel steps up to deliver his most challenging vocal part, which might be his favorite of the performance, though he loves everything left until the end:

versace on the floor ooh take it off for me, for me, for me, for me now, girl versace on the floor

it's risky in so many ways-- more provocative than daniel typical tries, testing his range more than daniel typically attempts, but if he wants to improve he can't play it safe. he needs to push his boundaries, and prove he's capable of more than anyone has seen from him week after week, and this is new. even with all the practice he put in for this part alone, he isn't perfect; his voice never is, but it's good enough-- no cracks, no glaring mistakes. (maybe this choice wasn't just based on liking the song, but a lyrical one too-- brief glimpse of bravado, cameo making an appearance, trusty as always, and he does his best to sell it. he's had practice in that too.)

the beat drops again, layered over hyojin's keyboard, getting the chance to really shine, and they go into a song daniel liked even before this competition: rooftop. he nearly rapped his first audition to this song, and admittedly didn't know much of the other songs hyojin chose before he gave him a much needed kpop crash course. he harmonizes again happily, and it shows on his face.

there's a twist this time, however, and instead of flipping back to an english song, it's daniel carrying them into fancy with the help of hyojin's harmony on that first fancy.

fancy you, who cares if who likes first

it's a short line, simple because they wanted an ode to tooice's recent release, which daniel now knows was very popular. he likes singing it, but more importantly, he likes what it leads up to: chandelier, hyojin's killing part. his vocals are spectacular, never the same, totally unique (but legitimately. no lies nor memes detected.)

they end off with another harmony, voices blending together in their final note, and when they're finished, in that beat of silence before the clapping comes, daniel looks at hyojin and grins.

they rush off stage, and daniel feels pride, even if nerves still linger too. he couldn't have come up with a better performance than this round, so he has no regrets, and knows he did his absolute best; he just doesn't know of that will be enough to keep them afloat in the competition. hyojin's words shake him out of his thoughts, however, and he returns them with a smile and a, "you too!" that he wholeheartedly means. he takes his partner's pinky and links it with his own. let's meet again. "we will," and he means that just as much.

#rkmga5 #rkmga5duos2 #hyojinrk #( * this was so fun!!#look @ that lyrics and times doc and check them all if u have time #we worked hard #to get them to line up instrumentally it sounds cool!!#ty pika ily #let me know if you don't want to be mentioned as always! )#;solo #;popvskpop #;stam

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dnkaus · 6 years

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Fateful Visions | Ch. 2 Old Relationships, New Acquaintances

Namjoon x Reader (OC)

Summary: Idol Namjoon meets a grad student, Maya, but he experiences strange visions each time their eyes meet and they touch one another. Fate plays a magnetic role, & keeps bringing them together. Are these visions a sign that they should stay away or stay together?

Genre: Angst, Fluff (eventually)

Warnings: Indirect mentions of emotional abuse

Previous Part: Chapter one Next Part: Chapter Three

2017 - 8 Months Later

Time flies when you are busy, when you are numb, and when you are a grad student. It had been 8 months since Namjoon and Maya met. It had been 8 months and Caleb and Maya were still together.

Nothing in their relationship had changed within these last 8 months. Caleb’s careless tendencies, and Maya’s apathetic attitude towards Caleb’s behavior continued.

Truth be told, Maya didn’t really have time for Caleb anymore. She didn’t have time to fight with him or care about how many terrible things he did and said to her. She merely continued the relationship because it was all she knew. For Maya, it was as if she had forgotten what it was like to not have Caleb around. There was still love hidden within Maya for Caleb, and that love kept holding her back from cutting ties with him. She was really just waiting for the final straw to drop, but there was no catalyst for that straw.

At least not until Maya received a strange email from Dr. Kelly. Maya was having the usual afternoon slump after her Women in Literature class, and so she decided to go get a chai latte from her campus cafe. She had just sat down with her chai, when she received the email notification on her phone. When she saw Dr. Kelly’s name initially she frowned. Getting an email from your advisor is not something most grad students look forward to, and Maya didn’t either. However, when she read the subject line her mind became more confused. The subject line read “BTS says thanks” . Maya was taking a sip of her chai when she saw the notification, but she immediately put her cup down and opened the email after she read the subject line.

Maya stopped breathing for a second as she read the email. She was confused, surprised, excited, in shock, all of those things at the same time. She kept reading and re-reading the email as she couldn’t believe what she was reading.

For the past 8 months, Maya had fallen down the BTS wormhole. She was pretty certain she had watched every BTS video there was, even though she knew that was really impossible. To Maya, the day when she met BTS seemed like a far away dream, rather than the reality. Over the past 8 months she had seen the BTS mania grow and had witnessed her first comeback with the Wings album release.

Maya didn’t want to admit she was now a full on ARMY, the name that BTS had lovingly given to their fans, but after listening to each member’s solo song in the Wings album, she felt pathetic trying to deny her truth.

After reading the email, Maya’s excitement was through the roof. She couldn’t believe she had just received tickets to a BTS concert. How in the world was she getting so lucky? And, she received not one but two tickets! She must have saved a few countries in her past life.

Maya finished her chai while she thought about who she would bring to the concert. No one in her life was a Kpop listener and neither were they interested in concerts and such. Such a boring life they all lived. Maya sighed and decided she would ask Caleb if he wanted to go. After all, he was her boyfriend. Shouldn’t he be the first person she thinks of in times like these?

Surprisingly when Maya brought up the idea of going to the concert, Caleb was intrigued. He had no idea that Maya had actually met BTS and neither did he care to ask about how she got the tickets. When Maya told him that she wanted to go to the concert, he thought it would be good for them to go on a trip together to Chicago.

Therefore, Maya put the date on her calendar and internally began looking forward to the day. It hit her a week after she received the tickets that the day of the concert was also Hoseok’s birthday. She knew this because, even though she was not an ARMY, she just happened to Google each member’s age and birthday. It’s totally normal, she swore to herself. The realization that Hoseok’s birthday was on the same as the concert, created a dilemma for Maya. She didn’t know BTS or Hoseok very well, but at the same time she felt weird going to the concert empty handed. She remembered that day when she had met BTS. She remembered Hoseok was the one who was insisting Namjoon to take Maya’s offer about giving them a ride. She needed to say thanks to him for trusting her that day.

Maya often found herself thinking that in some other universe, she might have even ended up as friends with some of them. Again she kept telling herself these were definitely not signs of being ARMY.

When Maya went to buy gifts for Hoseok, she ended up finding gifts for all the members. She figured that if this was her last chance to meet Hoseok, it was also her last chance to meet the rest of them. She really didn’t know why she was doing this or why she even cared enough to buy things for the 7 strangers. She just felt like she had to say thanks for inviting her. These gifts weren’t anything expensive, just small things she thought they would enjoy based on the little she knew about them.

She bought a plain white t-shirt for Jungkook, as that’s what she remembered him wearing when she saw them the first time. She bought a simple necklace for Jimin, as she had noticed him fixing it when he was getting out of the minivan the day Maya had given them a ride. She bought a set of sketching pencils for Taehyung, because she had read an article about how Taehyung likes to draw. Maya bought Yoongi a beanie, as she had seen countless airport pictures of Yoongi with a beanie (even though she still doesn’t admit she is an ARMY). For Seokjin, she had bought a really nice pair of travelling chopsticks, as she had heard the members talking about how he carries chopsticks with him when he travels. Maya had found a pair of sunglasses for Hoseok and she also decided to buy him a bag that matched his eccentric yet fashionable style. She bought Hoseok two things since he was after all the birthday boy. She hoped the other members wouldn’t be offended by that.

The only person she was hesitant to buy a gift for was Namjoon. Even though it had been 8 months, the images from Maya’s vision were still lingering in her head. A part of her was genuinely worried about meeting BTS. She was worried Namjoon didn’t like her, so when it came to buying gift for Namjoon it felt strange. What would she even buy for him? He probably wouldn't like anything she bought him anyways. What was the point? She tried to convince herself she was overthinking, but due to the images in her dreamlike vision, she couldn’t help but feel a weird energy about him.

Nonetheless, she settled on a gift idea for Namjoon after extensive deliberation. She decided she would buy him a small leather bound notebook, as she knew he did a lot of the writing for BTS’s songs. This notebook was the exact same type as she carried for her story ideas and other doodles. She figured if nothing else Namjoon can write about how he doesn’t like her in that notebook.

1 month later - Day of the concert

Soon the day had arrived when Caleb and Maya were supposed to go to Chicago for the concert. Maya was worried till the last second that Caleb wouldn’t show up for their road trip and she would end up having to go alone. She really didn’t mind it as much, but she felt like if she went alone her ticket would be wasted. But surprisingly, Caleb showed up right on time for their trip. Maya and Caleb had decided that Maya would drive since Caleb’s road rage was a bit scary at times and Maya did not want Caleb to get into a bad mood. Besides, what better and iconic way to go to a BTS concert than taking the same minivan that she used to drive them to their Kpop event? It felt right.

Maya and Caleb left for their trip at 10am in the morning, because the drive to the concert venue was at least 5 hours , and they had decided they would get some lunch along the way and also they figured if they get there early, they can always do some sight seeing. Maya had been to Chicago plenty of times before, but Caleb had never been, so he was more interested in the sight seeing portion of their trip than the actual concert. To be perfectly honest, Caleb had no clue which concert they were going to. He knew it was some Korean group, but Caleb had no interest in getting to know the group. He decided to tag along, since he wanted to go to Chicago, and spending time with Maya didn’t seem like the worst thing either.

Halfway towards Chicago, Maya stopped the van at a gas (petrol) station to fill up the tank. Caleb got out of the car as well to get something to eat from the gas station’s convenience store. Meanwhile, as Maya waited for the tank to get filled, she suddenly felt the urge to write a little poem that was lingering in her head. She quickly opened the back door to the van and got out her black leather notebook she carried around, and started scribbling her thoughts. However, before she could finish she saw Caleb walking out of the convenience store, so she quickly threw the notebook in the bag with all the presents for BTS. You see, Maya did not like to share her poems and stories with others, especially not Caleb. She had somehow managed to keep that notebook hidden from everyone so far. As Caleb came towards the car he noticed Maya closing the back door to the minivan.

“What was that?” Caleb asked as he got back to the van.

“What was what?” Maya responded as if she didn’t know what he was referring to. At this point the tank was filled and Maya had finished getting her receipt and got inside the car.

“I just saw you get something from the back seat, so I was just wondering what it was.” Caleb said as he got into the van and closed the door.

“Oh that...I...I was just getting a kleenex from my purse, but then I realized there were already kleenexes in the front by your seat, so I felt stupid…” Maya responded as she laughed awkwardly.

“You are pretty stupid aren’t you. I am glad you also notice how little you use your brain. ” Caleb said as he shook his head and laughed. He thought what he said was hilarious. To an outsider, this would initially seem like a joke, but unfortunately it wasn’t.

That was unnecessary, Maya thought. But then again, she was used to hearing Caleb say things like that. He never missed an opportunity to make Maya feel small. One way or another he always slid in a comment in their conversation that would somehow make Maya feel like a complete idiot, even if she wasn’t.

Maya didn’t respond. What was she to say? Getting Caleb mad was the last thing she wanted today. She definitely did not want to create a scene when they were at the concert. She knew she just had to swallow the words.

Many people had asked Maya why she was still with Caleb, if he was so insensitive and straight up mean. However, Maya never really had a good response to that question. Logically, she knew being with him was the terrible idea. She knew that maybe if she broke up with him, she would find someone else. But she was used to having him around. She was used to feeling small. Us humans tend to stick to what’s familiar. Even if that familiar thing is toxic.

The road trip continued and so did the conversation. At one point, Caleb turned around and saw the bag in the back with gifts. “Who are those for?” Caleb asked. It hit Maya at that point that she had never explained to Caleb how she had managed to get the tickets and how she had backstage passes to meet the boy group they were going to go see. She knew if she told him the truth, he would get upset, so she had to find a way to make him the least mad. Caleb had temper issues and Maya was well aware of that from her previous experiences, so she took caution about each word she said around him. This is because she feared that even her slightest mistake would end up in some terrible consequence.

Maya was driving, but she took a few seconds and pretended to mess with the navigation app on her phone to buy some time to come with an appropriate excuse for Caleb’s question.

“Umm, those...those are from Dr. Kelly. Ummm, I don’t know if I told you this but actually these guys that are performing tonight were at UCA some months ago for one of Dr. Kelly’s events, and that’s why she is sending these gifts to say thanks to them for attending her cultural event. She gave them to me since she can’t go.” Maya said hesitatingly.

Caleb was a quiet for a second, which scared Maya so she turned to look towards him, but he was just on his phone texting someone.

“I am sorry, did you say something?” Caleb answered after a few moments.

Maya debated whether to repeat her sentence since he was obviously not interested in listening. She decided she would since they were going to meet BTS anyways, so it would look bad if he didn’t know anything.

“Uh, yeah, I was just saying those gifts are from Dr. Kelly. She sent them for the boy group we will be seeing tonight because they attended one of her cultural events.”

“Oh, okay. Well, have you met these guys before?” Caleb asked.

Great! Now Maya was having another dilemma. Should she mention the whole story about BTS getting lost and then her driving them there? Nope, that’s a terrible idea, she thought.

“Umm, yeah I met them briefly the day of the event.”

“-- Just briefly though.” Maya emphasized.

“Okay, well they better have some good music. Otherwise, I am gonna be so bored at the concert.” Caleb responded.

“Oh I am sure it’s good.” Maya said nervously.

Caleb and Maya arrived in Chicago around 4pm, since they had stopped for lunch at a restaurant on their way to Chicago. As soon as they arrived to Chicago, Caleb insisted he wanted to go to Millennium Park and as their first sightseeing destination. Maya had been there multiple times, but she went along with what Caleb wanted.

“Alright, but after Millenium Park, we should get dinner and head to the venue. I am sure it’s going to be really crowded and I don’t want to miss any part of the concert.” Maya said with enthusiasm.

“Wow, you seem really excited for this thing..huh?” Caleb was beginning to think Maya was a fan of this boy group from the way she talked about them, and he didn’t like it.

Maya hesitated before responding. “Uh- no! I am just saying, it would look bad if we didn’t get there on time.”

“I doubt they will notice if you don’t show up, Maya. It’s not like they know you. I think we should just explore Chicago while we are here and skip the concert!” Caleb broke Maya’s little illusion and said exactly what Maya was worried he would say. Why did she bring him here again? Maya thought to herself. This was a bad idea and she was starting to get a feeling it was only going to get worse from here

“True, I-I guess I just don’t want to let down Dr. Kelly. We can go to the Millenium Park, but we have to go to the concert after that.”

“Ugh, fine.” Caleb somehow gave into the idea, which surprised Maya.

As expected, when the Millennium park tour and dinner were over, Caleb tried once again to convince Maya to skip the concert. However, Maya kept insisting this was what Dr. Kelly had wanted, and somehow managed to take him to the concert venue without his full blown tantrum. By now, Maya knew what she should not do to get on his bad side.

Once they arrived at the venue, Caleb fully understood how big this group, BTS really was. He had thought they were some small scale underground band, but when he looked at the line outside the concert he realized this was a mania. Maya was also taken aback by the amount of people she saw waiting to go inside. Even though she had expected a lot of people to be here considering the growth in popularity in the past year. Maya’s adrenaline began to rise as the line that they were waiting in to go inside, finally started moving after they had waited for 20 minutes.

“Are you excited?”asked one of the other girls in front of Maya and Caleb.

“Yes! You have no idea! I can’t believe we are finally here. I had been counting down the days since I got the tickets. ” Maya couldn’t hold back her enthusiasm.

Caleb cleared his throat, indicating his disapproval of Maya’s excitement. Busted! Maya thought, as soon as she looked over at Caleb and realized her cover had been blown and he had probably guessed that she was not just here for Dr. Kelly.

“What I mean is, it’s really great that Kpop is crossing over in America. I am excited to see Americans embrace a different culture.” Maya said softly.

The girl that had asked the question, just smiled politely and turned away after she noticed Caleb’s frown.

Maya sighed as she realized she wasn’t going to be able to show any excitement the rest of the night.

As Caleb sat down in his seat he noticed the ARMY bombs/ light sticks the people around him were holding.

“What are these light thingy everyone is holding? Did we forget to get one from the front?” Caleb whispered in Maya’s ear.

Maya laughed. “Uh no, those ‘thingies are called ARMY bombs, it’s a BTS exclusive light stick you have to buy. They are definitely not free.” Maya sounded a bit enthusiastic and maybe a little snarky when she said it, and that suddenly made Caleb mad.

“Wow, you are so obsessed. I think you need to get some help, Maya. This type of behavior isn’t good for your health.” Caleb retorted out of insecurity. This was Caleb’s usual way of processing things he doesn’t know.

“I am not obsessed, Caleb. I was just telling you since you asked a question. I am sorry I didn’t mean to sound..”

“Sorry doesn’t solve everything does it, Maya? Your fan girl side is just getting annoying.”

Maya was irritated. She had controlled herself the entire day, but her patience was wearing out.

“Caleb if you don’t want to be here get out.” Maya said with the most serious tone.

Caleb was speechless. Maya rarely ever used this tone. She never dared say anything to Caleb that would possibly trigger his temper when they were alone, but right now they were in a public space. Maya knew he couldn’t do anything right now.

“What did you just say to me?” Caleb hissed towards Maya.

Maya responded without missing a beat. “I said, if you don’t want to be here get out. I feel terrible. Your ticket could have been used by someone who would have actually enjoyed the show.”

“You better stop your talking right now, Maya. What did I say to you last time when you were being snarky? I am being really patient right now, but if you don’t stop I am going to drag you out of here.”

Maya didn’t respond as the concert was starting. She wanted to enjoy the concert. She wanted to see the guys perform again. She remembered how great their previous performance was, when she saw them at that Kpop event. Maya felt excited to be in the crowd this time instead of backstage. Maya had zoned out whatever rubbish Caleb was talking as the boys walked on to the stage.

She noticed their hair were completely different colors than the last time she saw them. “Rainbow. Army’s rainbow.” Maya smiled and mumbled under her breath. Caleb saw her smile and felt his anger growing.

“What? What are you saying?” Caleb screamed in Maya’s ear. However, Maya completely ignored him as her attention was only towards the guys on the stage. She found herself especially looking at Namjoon, whose hair was purple this time. She thought back to the hallway and the images she saw when they shook hands. She had never imagined his hair being purple. Strange.

The performances began and the fanchants started. Caleb was dumbfounded by the amount of enthusiasm the audience had towards the guys on the stage. He wasn’t sure what was going on. Maya just silently admired the audience and the guys on the stage. She knew about the fanchants, but she was just too much in awe to participate. All of this just felt surreal.

After the first several songs, Caleb finally managed to get Maya’s attention when the boys went to change for their solo performances. “Are you listening to me?” Caleb shouted into Maya’s ear again. Maya finally looked over.

“What? What do you want, Caleb?” Maya was annoyed by him.

“Why were you looking at them like that?” Caleb asked as he had noticed the smile that was permanently glued on Maya’s face when the boys were on stage.

“I don’t know what you mean.” Maya asked, even though she knew exactly what he meant.

“Okay, that’s it. I can’t stand this smug look on your face, Maya.” Caleb grabbed Maya’s hand and started dragging her outside.

“Let me go” Maya yelled. Caleb grabbed onto Maya’s wrist even more tightly. “--Let me go Caleb. It hurts” he continued to drag her out of the main arena. “Please just let me go…”

By this time, they were already outside and were standing almost in the alley behind the arena, where there wouldn’t be as many people. Once they were outside, Caleb made her face him and aggressively let go of her hand.

Maya softly put her other hand around the hand Caleb was holding and pulled it near her chest. Her excitement was depleted and her heart was now filled with fear and embarrassment.

“What did I say earlier?” Caleb said with his grave serious tone.

Maya said nothing.

“Maya...answer my question. What did I say earlier?”

“About what?” Maya asked hesitatingly. She did not want to disturb the beast more than she already had, but for some odd reason, she was just more tired than usual with Caleb’s nonsense.

Caleb sighed. “Just answer one thing. You know those guys don’t you?” Caleb said changing the topic, but just slightly.

“I...I just happened to meet them at the event. I don’t really know them.” Maya answered

“Oh really?! Well, why were you acting like a 12 year old in there? Huh? You were being such a fangirl back there. That’s not you Maya. You are supposed to be a book nerd or be into some weird underground stuff. That’s what I thought you liked.” Caleb was sounding more calm, but really he was just disguising his anger in a form of indirect insults.

Maya had tears welling up inside her eyes, but after hearing Caleb’s comment, she rolled her eyes.

“Caleb you don’t know anything about me, so just stop pretending.” Maya snapped back.

“Woah, woah, what’s with the attitude, huh? Ever since we stepped in Chicago, you act like you are better than me or something. I really don’t like that Maya.”

As much as Maya was afraid of the consequences of her actions, she suddenly had a weird feeling take over her as a thought popped into her head. Caleb was still waiting for her response. He was looking towards the road outside the alley when Maya suddenly started speaking.

“...hmm, I can’t remember the exact lyrics. It goes something like ‘the tomorrow we’ve been waiting for becomes the name of yesterday at some point...Tomorrow becomes today, today becomes yesterday, tomorrow becomes yesterday and is behind me...life isn’t about living along but living through...as you live through, you’ll disappear someday”

Maya was mumbling in Korean at this point as she smiled at the ground and looked as if she was in her own little world. Caleb was just plain confused by Maya’s strange behavior.

“What are you saying?” Caleb asked. His irritation slowly reaching its peak.

Maya didn’t answer. She tried to remember all the times she had spent with him. The reasons she was choosing to stay with him were few, and as the days were passing, Caleb was losing even the few redeeming qualities that kept Maya from leaving. She remembered the song ‘Tomorrow’ she had heard from BTS. Those lyrics has stuck with her for a while because they made her uncomfortable.

Those lyrics made her uncomfortable because she was waiting this entire time for a catalyst. A catalyst that would influence her to break up with Caleb. She kept telling herself, she would break up with him when the right opportunity arose. But the more she was waiting, the more days were passing by when she couldn’t be herself. The “todays” were becoming “yesterdays” and now she was standing in a back alley of an arena with a man who had hurt her in more ways than one.

Maya took a deep breath. The deepest breath she could possibly take. She then looked up towards Caleb, trying to muster her courage and also preparing for whatever consequences that would follow next.

“Caleb, I am breaking up with you.” Maya said in the most assertive tone she could manage.

Caleb was astounded. He couldn’t believe what he was hearing. “What?” He asked.

“Let’s break up. This is just stupid. I have been waiting to break up with for a long time, and I kept waiting for the right opportunity, but it seems like the right opportunity will always be when I make it one. So I am choosing now. We need to break up.”

“Huh, you think this is that simple, Maya? All these years. You can’t just break up with me.”

“I know. All these years. It’s a lot. I shouldn't have taken this long to say this. I am sorry.”

Caleb suddenly grabbed on to Maya’s wrist again. This time even more tightly than before.

“You think I am some toy? Do you think you can just throw me away when you are done?” Caleb yelled.

“Let go of me, Caleb.” Maya tried to be calm, even though she was in pain.

“No, you can’t get rid of me so easily, Maya.”

“I can. I can get rid of you and I will. Let go of my hand.” Maya shouted back.

In response, Caleb raised his other hand, which was not holding on to Maya and was ready to slap her face. Maya closed her eyes as she saw the hand coming towards her. However, nothing happened. She kept waiting for what seemed like an eternity, and finally had enough courage to open her eyes.

When Maya opened her eyes, she saw that there was another hand that was holding back Caleb’s hand. She was surprised so she looked over at the owner of the hand. Maya saw a person with a black hoodie and a black face mask on. She couldn’t see their eyes nor any other features. All she saw was the person’s hand.

She looked back at Caleb, who for the first time showed a hint of fear with his anger.

“Who are you?” Caleb asked to the person that was holding on to his hand much more tightly than Caleb was holding on to Maya’s hand.

The person let go of Caleb’s hand by swinging it back, and they pushed him back against the wall of the arena and whispered something in his ear. Maya couldn’t hear anything as another song started inside the venue and the speakers blasted, which created a vibration sound even outside the arena.

Maya was still in shock at everything that was happening. She wanted the person to stop, but at the same time she didn’t. All of the sudden, the person let go of Caleb and pushed him back away from Maya and themself.

All of this was making Maya dizzy. She couldn’t understand what the person had said to to Caleb, but now she was seeing Caleb running away out from the alley.

“Caleb” Maya found herself shouting. But Caleb was gone by the time she finished saying his name. She didn’t know Caleb could run this fast until today. What had this person said to him to make him run this quickly?

“Where is he going?” Maya asked the person. She just realized that now that Caleb was gone, she was alone with the strange hooded person. She began to get scared.

It also didn’t help that the person started walking towards her. Maya started taking steps back one at a time as they took steps forward.

“Who are you?” Maya asked.

The person didn’t answer.

“I said who are you?” Maya’s voice was quivering more as she asked the second time.

Still no response.

Suddenly the person reached out towards her, so she closed her eyes again. But it turned out the person was just reaching for the door that was behind her to get inside. Maya realized this as she heard the squeak of the door, when the person opened the door, and by the time she opened her eyes the person was already inside.

Maya just stood there for the next few moments. Trying to absorb everything that had just happened. She was shaking and terrified, but also somewhat relieved. Maya’s heart was pounding, but she slowly brought herself back to reality.

Then it finally hit her. She was free. She was finally free from the trap of the guy that had prevented her from truly living her life these past few years. Now that he was gone, she was free to be as “stupid,” “idiotic, “mindless,” and all the other worse things he called her before. Maya took another deep breath and looked at the full moon in the sky. It had a bluish tint to it. Wan blue.

Maya eventually went back inside the venue from the front entrance again and returned back for the rest of the concert. It turned out she had missed Namjoon’s, Seokjin’s, and Yoongi’s solo performances. She internally thanked her luck that she didn’t miss Jimin’s Lie performance, because it was truly magical.

After the concert everyone started piling out the arena to head home. Maya grabbed her bag of gifts, which were thankfully hidden under her seat the entire time the chaos took place outside and started debating how she should get backstage. She decided to ask the security person in the lobby who talked to 5 other people through their walkie-talkie about her backstage pass to ensure she really did had backstage access.

After her security clearance, Maya managed to get backstage which was almost more chaotic than the lobby. The staff and crew were running around trying to clean up the place and getting ready to go home. Maya wasn’t sure where she would find the boys. She felt like a lost kid at a hardware store, as she really did not know how the show business worked.

Suddenly someone tapped on her shoulder as she was reading a sign of a room, and she flinched back and turned around. Maya’s adrenaline was still high from everything that happened earlier, and she was not sure what she was doing here at this point. She finally turned around and realized it was Seokjin. Seokjin also flinched back when he saw Maya flinching.

“Oh my gosh, you scared me” Maya said in English, out of habit.

“You scared me more” Seokjin responded in English. His English sounds much better than last time, Maya thought.

“I am so sorry, I just have sensitive reflexes” Maya finally began speaking in Korean and bowed.

Seokjin laughed. “Don’t worry, I do too.”

“Anyways, it’s nice to see you again” Seokjin continued

Maya felt herself becoming nervous. Crap, she was meeting BTS again! Was this really happening?

“Ah, it’s really nice to see you again too! Where is everyone else?” Maya asked.

“I think they must be in the dressing room. Let’s go find them.”

Maya followed Seokjin’s lead towards the dressing room. However, on her way there something caught her attention. There was a hoodie lying at one of the couches by the food section. She remembered this hoodie, as this was the hoodie that the mysterious person that helped her was wearing earlier. Maya gulped at the thought of who that hoodie could possibly belong to? Maya also noticed the door that probably led them outside. One thing was confirmed, it was definitely someone who had access to the backstage, because they entered through the door which led them directly to the room with all the food.

By this time Seokjin had led Maya to the dressing room. He opened the door slightly and before Maya could go in he blocked it.

“Just give me a second. I need to make sure...you know...that they all look presentable before I take you inside.” Seokjin smiled. Maya’s face became red as she realized she can’t just barge into their dressing room without warning.

Seokjin went inside, and then opened the door completely to let her in. “C’mon in!” Seokjin welcomed her in.

When Maya walked inside she saw most of the members were on their phone or were wiping their hair with their towels. They must have just gotten dressed after taking a shower. Then she looked towards the couch and found Yoongi sleeping and Namjoon was eating a banana while reading a book. As soon as they saw her, they all looked up from their phones and such.

“Hey, it’s Maya-ssi!” Taehyung shouted, as if he was the only one who had seen her. Maya felt strange seeing him after all this time. If it wasn’t for Taehyung that day helping Maya with the paper, she wouldn’t even have been standing in that room.

“Hey, guys!” Maya responded. Namjoon silently shook Yoongi, so he would wake up. Yoongi flicked him off, turned around and went back to sleep.

Before Maya talked to anyone, she walked over to Hoseok who was sitting in a chair where he probably had gotten his makeup done before the concert. Maya pulled out a small gift bag from within her giant bag and handed it to Hoseok. Hoseok just took the bag and smiled.

“Happy Birthday, Hoseok! This is for you.” Maya said with a smile in response.

“Oh wow, you didn’t need to get me anything. You came all the way here from Arkansas, that’s special enough, Maya-ssi.”

“Are you kidding? You guys were amazing and you sent me free tickets and I got to see you on your birthday!! I can’t just come here empty handed. ” Maya said while laughing.

“Well, thank you so much! This is awesome!” Hoseok gestured at the bag as he responded.

“No problem. Hope you had a good birthday!”

“I did, actually. Chicago is nice!”

“Yeah, it is, isn’t it” Maya softly responded.

Maya then turned around and found most of them staring at her bag. Yoongi was even awake by this time and was also intrigued by the giant bag. Maya saw their expressions and laughed.

“Guys, don’t worry, I brought stuff for all of you. These things are probably nothing compared to what you guys get from your fans. I just felt like even though I don’t know you very well, I still had to come say ‘hi’ when I had the chance.”

Jungkook was the first one to grab the bag from Maya’s hand and start looking inside. Taehyung also started seeing what was in there with Jungkook. All of the sudden she saw Namjoon get up from his seat and Maya felt nervous again for some reason. She initially thought he was walking out of the room, but instead he started walking towards her.

“How are you?” Namjoon said as he put his hands in his side pockets and stood in front of Maya.

“Uh...I...I am okay. You?” Maya stuttered as she talked for some reason. It was probably because of the images she saw last time when she shook hands, she later thought.

“I am good. Please take care.” Namjoon said in return.

“Oh okay, yeah...you too!” Maya managed to make a somewhat coherent response. Why was he being nice all of the sudden?

Their conversation was interrupted as Taehyung came over to show her his new sketch pencils.

“These are awesome! I love this company. Thank you!” Taehyung said.

“Aww, I am glad you like them.” Maya smiled.

“You know what, I am gonna send you my drawings when I use them. Okay?” Taehyung asked.

Maya was surprised by Taehyung’s enthusiasm. “Yeah that sounds awesome!”

“Can I have your phone?” Taehyung asked suddenly.

“What?” Maya was confused.

“Oh, I thought I can give you my second phone number, so I can send them to you using that.” Taehyung said.

Maya was shocked. Was this really happening? Was Kim Taehyung giving her his phone number?

“It’s his second phone, not his personal one. Don’t worry.” Jimin came over and clarified.

“Oh okay.” Was all Maya could say as she handed over her phone to Taehyung.

Taehyung quickly handed her back her phone after entering his number.

Then Maya suddenly heard two voices talk at the same time “no food?” Maya turned around to find Jungkook and Seokjin both looking at the bag and then looking up at her.

Maya felt flustered. “Oh ummm...yeah I didn’t bring any food. I am so sorry! Did you guys want anything specific? I can go get something right now!” Maya said trying to resolve their disappointment.

Hoseok came over and stood next to Maya. “No, don’t worry about it! They are just being silly. We have plenty of food outside anyways.” He said.

“Uh okay. Well if for some odd reason, if I run into any of you again, I will be sure to give you guys food!” Maya laughed.

“No, no it’s okay. We were just joking, Maya-ssi!” Seokjin responded.

“How is your thesis going by the way?” Jimin asked from across the room as he shuffled through the bag to find his present.

“Oh, umm...it’s going well, actually. I am applying for internships and study abroad opportunities, so it’s exciting.” Maya said.

“So, you are meeting us again then?” Yoongi answered from the couch. He was still laying on the couch.

“What do you mean?” Maya asked.

“Well, aren’t you going to apply to study in Korea?”

“Oh, yeah...well I am applying, but let’s see if I can get enough funds to actually go there.”

“Good. Travelling to culture of interest is the best way to learn about the culture. Otherwise, classrooms are not meant for learning.” Yoongi said in his elderly man wisdom voice.

Maya laughed. “You are right. It really isn’t.”

“How are you guys though? You guys are getting so popular since the last time we met. It feels surreal.”

“Yeah, it kind of is.” Jimin responded this time.

The security guard came and interrupted the strange and surreal moment. “Ma’am, you need to start heading out. We need to get the boys back to the hotel soon.” He said.

“Oh, okay.” Maya softly responded. For a second Maya had forgotten that this is not her world. This was BTS’s s world. She was merely a girl that happened to meet them once or twice.

“I guess I will see you guys later” Maya said and looked around the room.

All the guys stood up and came over towards her. “Have a safe trip back,” Namjoon said again with his professional leader voice.

“You too. Bye guys! Thanks for the tickets!” Maya nodded.

Maya shook hands with Jungkook and Jimin as they extended their hands and waved at everyone else before leaving the room and returning back to her own little reality.

With this reality came the realization that she had just broken up with her boyfriend of several years who was about to hit her but was saved by a stranger, who she still doesn’t know anything about.

Maya found her way back to the parking lot and started driving back. This day was definitely far from ordinary. She felt both sad and happy. She felt tears in her eyes but she was also relieved. Maya felt a hodgepodge of emotions on her way back to Arkansas.

After Maya left, Namjoon saw the bag that she had left for them with presents for each member. By the time Namjoon got around to looking at the bag, it was practically empty, except there were two things left. One item was packed in a nice box with a post-it note, and other was a worn out leather notebook. Namjoon read the post-it note on the nicely packed box, which was written in Korean.

“To: Namjoon

This is for all your good, bad, and the ugly thoughts. Use it well. Enjoy!

-Maya”

Namjoon smirked just slightly, and opened the box to find the same black notebook as the other one. Except this one was brand new. Namjoon picked up the other black notebook from the bag and compared the two. They were exactly the same, he thought.

First, he opened the brand new notebook and flipped through the pages. It was completely empty. Second, he decided to open the worn out notebook. As soon as he opened the notebook, he realized it was Maya’s personal notebook and closed it immediately, took it with him and put it in his bag before anyone else found it.

Namjoon thought about whether he should return the notebook somehow, or just let it be. He realized if he contacted her again, it would mean their paths would cross again, which he did not want after experiencing those images last time when they shook hands.

However, if he didn’t contact her, would she notice her notebook was gone? He decided he would just keep it. She is a writer, she probably has so many notebooks, he thought.

He ended up keeping the notebook in his personal bag the entire plane ride back to Korea. He didn’t open it or try to read what’s inside. He just kept it with him.

It wasn’t until a month later, when Namjoon finally couldn’t resist opening the notebook. It was the same day he found out the truth about his girlfriend, Choi Ji Hyu.

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