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batlingsstuff · 3 years

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|| DREAM SMP HEADCANONS ||

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

hello! this is my first time doing headcanons, and i just want to clarify some things:

sadly, i won't be doing requests because i'm busy af with school and i dont want to dissapoint anyone, but you can drop some suggestions and i would think about it! it would be really nice :)

also i won't be writing romantic headcanons for minors or those who are uncomfortable with it, but i can do platonic headcanons for them! ^^

i won't be doing nsfw headcanons either, because i'm uncomfy with sexualizing real people and just writing nsfw in general :)

also, please tell me if someone is uncomfortable with fanfics and/or headcanons and i will erase that part as fast as possible, thanks for passing by! - batling

✦ means platonic

✦ characters : ranboo, tubbo, tommy, philza, techno and jschlatt

♥ means romantic

♥ characters: quackity, wilbur, nihachu, dream, george, sapnap, eret, karl, fundy and bbh

keywords:

(y/n) : your name

(n/n) : nickname

(p/p) : pizza place

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

“As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” – John Green

┌────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┐

SLEEPOVERS

---

GENDER NEUTRAL

└────── ⋆⋅✦⋅⋆ ──────┘

♥ Quackity

oh boy

i just have two words for this one: pure chaos

he will punch you with a pillow if you try to sleep

and you will be MAD at this

grabbing a pillow and hitting him RIGHT IN THE FACE with all your strenght

he'll probably fake cry about it, saying that you hurt him

after a while of pillow fighting, you guys got tired and plopped into the bed, snuggling into eachother and just enyoing the comfortable silence before drifting to sleep

♥ Wilbur

you two will probably blast hamilton and scream the lyrics till the neighbours wake up and you get angry knocks at your door

and you will laugh at that, lowering the speaker's volume and telling him to lower his voice aswell to avoid your neighbours calling the police

then you'll eat snacks and talk about anything that pops into your mind, laughing at the most silly jokes

he will sing sweet songs to you, making you fall asleep to his calming voice

summary: fluff

♥ Nihachu

you and her will bake pastries at a very late hour

she REALLY enjoys baking with you bc she thinks it's a great way to spend time with you

all this girl wants is to spend her time by your side, doing particularlly anything like streaming, baking, playing games and going outside for a walk and/or shopping

once you finished baking, she will kiss your cheek multiple times. that's her way to tell you that you did a great job :)

you'll spend the rest of the night cuddling, eating your pastries and watching some random movie, commenting about how bad it is and laughing

♥ Dream

bruh

this bitch will speedrun the sleepover

is it possible to speedrun a sleepover? maybe

you'll spend the rest of the night probably playing uncharted 3: drake's deception in his old ps3

after a while, you guys got bored from uncharted and went to his pc to play amnesia: the dark descent

there are 2 options:

you will be scared as fuck and will avoid looking at the screen when you think something bad will happen or when some body will come out from a drawer

or you will be totally chill with it, laughing hard when clay pisses his pants for real when he encounters the gatherer

you named the gatherer 'bob' :)

♥ George

he'll take you to the rooftop

and pushes you so you fall to your death

i mean

he gets blankets and pillows so you can stargaze together

he'll teach you the constelations while pointing them, excited about every single one of them

"look (y/n), that's the ursa major!"

he'll have hot chocolate prepared too, so you don't get cold while stargazing

you try your best to not fall asleep on the rooftop

but eventually fail

when he notices you're asleep, he stops talking about the constellations and carries you to your bedroom, giving you a goodnight kiss and leaving you in your bed so you can have a peaceful rest

♥ Sapnap

hey mamas

i don't know what sapnap will do in a sleepover so i will just improvise B)

you will watch anime together

not any kind of anime, like that romance-comedy bullcrap

no fuck that

you will watch the classy angsty anime like madoka magica

WATCH IT IF YOU HAVEN'T ALREADY

you will fucking cry because of literally anything that happens to the characters

"(y/n) why are you crying it's just a show"

'IT'S NOT ANY SHOW SAPNAP IT'S FUCKING MADOKA MAGICA OF COURSE I'M GOING TO CRY'

the last chapter made you fucking cry harder

AUTHOR HERE I WAS CRYING SO MUCH WHEN IT ENDED

yeah you will basically watch anime with him, cry about it and he will comfort you and bring you a glass of water so you don't have a terrible headache after it

I KNOW THIS HEADCANON SUCKED I'M SO SORRY

♥ Eret

KINGG <3

you two will plan a picnic in your yard

yes your yard

he'll bring a ton of snacks and you'll buy a few drinks

you two spend the rest of the picnic talking about your future and enjoying the snacks

then, he'll make you stand up and will teach you how to dance tango

and of course you will mess everything up

and you even stomped on his feet accidentally, making him wimper

but he brushed off the pain and laughed at your concerned face

after calming down his laughter, he gave you a passionate kiss and hugged you tightly

i love eret ok

♥ Karl Jacobs

this man.

this man is the definition of sweet

you'll spend the night cuddling and making cute pet names for eachother

he will definetely give you a great back massage if you're stressed

then he'll start writing love letters full of things he adore of you

and you'll do the same for him

after that, you will share your letters and just snuggle and smile at the sweet things you guys wrote for eachother

he will deffo shower you with kisses when he finishes reading your letter, telling you that you're the nicest person on earth

and that he loves you so so much

♥ Fundy

i'm a huge fundy simp ok

he will bring his piano to your house and you guys will compose a melody together

he will let you sit on his lap while you play the piano/keyboard with him

fundy will basically teach you how to play basic piano songs

you asked him if you guys could play megalovania together

he said no :(

but still you got to play nice songs together without messing up

and when you got the hang of it, he snuggled his face in your neck and kissed you there genly

and when you got tired, he started playing very calming songs and you fell asleep in his lap, snuggling into his chest

he gently carried to your room and will sleep beside you putting a fair distance so you can have a comfortable sleep!

♥ BadBoyHalo

bbh supremacy

he will get rat ready so you can snuggle with her too :)

you guys will mainly play with rat and talk about life in general

he will call you tons of cute pet names

ofc he will call you muffin it's bbh who we're talking about

he will talk about how bad he wants to spend the rest of his life with you

after a while, he will take you to his kitchen and start making muffins together

he will guide you on how to bake 'em though

you guys had a great time making muffins and cuddling with him and rat :)

══════ ∘◦❀◦∘ ══════

✦ Ranboo

tall mf gives the best piggy back rides

when he gets to your house there is a 100% chance he will bump his head on the door frame

and there is a 100% chance you will make fun of him because of that

"(y/n) please stop laughing my head hurts :("

you'll give him some ice to put on his head while you two play minecraft on your ps4

you will bring snacks too and ask him if his head is better

"yeah, thank you (n/n)"

he will pull you in a hug so you can be comfy together while you play good ol' minecraft

because ranboo surely doesn't play anything besides fucking minecraft

stfu that video of him playing spooky's jump scare mansion doesn't exist

✦ Tubbo

SWEET BE BOYY <3

he will gift you a bee plushie

expect a lot of (FRIENDLY) hugs from him

like fundy, you guys will play piano together

you guys are most likely to prank call some random numbers AND your friends

and you accidentally called some random pizza place

"hello! this is (p/p), may i take your order?"

you were nervous and didn't know what to say

UNTIL YOU CAME UP WITH A GREAT IDEA

"hello? are you there?"

'hi yes, i would like to order 7 extra large pepperoni pizzas to (tommy's adress).'

"oh- okay! uhm- they will arrive in a few hours. are you okay with that?"

'yes ma'am, thank you.'

when you ended the call, you couldn't help but burst out laughing, knowing that tommy will be so mad at you guys-

✦ Tommy

like quackity, PURE. CHAOS.

you guys will obviously stream your sleepover

doing a q&a stream :)

tubbo and wilbur will probably crash your stream and start spamming things like 'MEETUP??' and 'DIDN'T GET AN INVITE'

you guys laughed and added them to the call

"WHY THE FUCK DIDN'T YOU GUYS INVITE ME?" wilbur shouted

'i'm sorry willlll'

you kept playing minecraft with wilbur, tubbo and quackity too since he crashed your stream like an hour later

after the stream, you got up and plopped on the mattress that was on the floor

"tired?"

'yeah'

"okay, good night big (initial)"

✦ Philza

POG

YEAHHH SLEEPOVER WITH THE MINECRAFT GOD

AND KRISTIN'S THERE TOO :)))

and oh god you ADORE kristin

i'm pretty sure she's a total sweetheart

it would be like having a sleepover with your parents

only that it's less boring

you guys will watch a movie together, you will be in one side of the couch eating snacks while phil and kristin are in the other cuddling

you'll eventually bug them about it

after the movie, you fell asleep early and philza noticed, talking to kristin about it too

and wrapped a blanket around you so that you get a good rest :)

✦ Technoblade

mr. blood god teaches you the arts of the CRAFT.

yeah i mean it's techno what else does he play besides minecraft

he will play bedwars w/ u, teaching you how to pvp

"bro you kinda suck tbh"

'stfu techno'

he will comment about how bad you are, but tries to help you get better anyways

and when you do a very poggers gamer move, he praises you

and when he praises you you're all :)))

after awhile, he gets tired from watching you play minecraft and suggest watching anime

fucking weeb

i mean

other thing you guys do together in a sleepover is playing and commenting about pokemon

if you don't like pokemon get tf out of here /J

i was joking please don't leave i respect your tastes

✦ Jschlatt

ooooh boy

get ready for a session of wii training

that's all you guys will do

play wii sports and some other shit like wii music

he will laugh his ass of if you fall while playing wii fit

but he will eventually help you bc outside his funny and shouty persona, he's a really chill guy and a really nice person!

seriously like have you ever seen a theweeklyslap video?

well expect hearing amazing pep talks from him

bc this man is a legend and knows his way to words and is very good at comforting people :)

sometimes you'll rant to him about anything that's happening in your life, and he will listen to you and give you really helpful advice

and you appreciate him so much for that

✧─── ･｡ﾟ★: *.✦ .* :★. ───✧

TYSM FOR READING GUYS, i appreciate it if you made it this far :)

i hope you guys really enjoyed these headcanons, it's my first time doing them and aa i'm a bit nervous about posting this but i'll be fine ig

also i'm sorry if there's a grammatical error, english is not my native language and i'm still learning it :) have a nice day/night, drink water and don't fuck up your sleeping schedule!!

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probably-haven · 3 years

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after binge reading i have come to a new revelation: I’m not a fan of most Xiaoven fanfics

Don’t get me wrong, I love the ship and its one of my favorite to think about.... but most of the fanfiction for the ship just- doesn’t sit right with me for a number of reasons.

Disclaimer: these are personal opinions from my own taste and are in no way an attack against any authors out there, because frankly fanfic authors are great and not like i could do better lol. As these are personal opinions, I acknowledge here and now that a number of people disagree and that they are under no obligation to change their opinions in any way as it is not and never will be my intention to tell others what they should be thinking That said- read at your own risk if you want- meh, anyway-

time to share some opinions that have been on my mind lately

The biggest reason.... is how they handle Xiao. And I don’t even mean mischaracterization because Xiao is such a complex and yet simultaneously simple character that as long as you’re somewhere in the range of “Xiao vibes” it’s really hard to write him out of character because of his complexities. What I mean is something that i actually completely agree with as being accurate to his character. In nearly every single fanfic I’ve seen, there is some element of idolization that Xiao has for Venti, or for the sake of reference, Barbatos. He tends to think himself beneath Barbatos and/or indebted to him, whether that be because he’s an archon, because he saved him, or simply because of Xiao’s tendency to dehumanize(yes i see the irony in that word usage) himself. This by itself isn’t an issue but its often how this trait of his is treated.

Imma just list a few ways I’ve seen this be handled within Xiaoven fics. - It isn’t handled, it’s just there and accepted as a part of who he is in the story - It isn’t handled but his trait is treated as source of humor within the story - Venti(and others) roll with it (finding humor in it, just cant change it, encouraging it, making jokes about it, etc.) - Venti takes advantage of it(whether accidentally or purposely) - it’s actually addressed(by Venti or someone else or the narration- can go a number of ways, but just- even a brief reference to the fact that its not a good mindset fits in here) - savior!Venti(Where venti disagrees with it but the way it’s written gives off “god among mortals” vibes- like he’s just being humble and truly is above him in reality) - its the focus of the story - not directly addressed but shown to be destructive. - they chose not to not include this in the story’s characterization of Xiao(just saying that this is valid ahead of time) Theres others but i have a lot already. Note that I tend to read more ‘serious-toned’(idk if that makes sense) fics so that may skew my perception

Now there’s a few that i have issues with on their own- both instances of it not being handled, Venti(and others) rolling with it, Venti takes advantage of it(purposely(and without good intent)), and savior!Venti. Xiao not only has this trait, but he is unfamiliar with what is normal in relationships or emotions as a result of isolation and inexperience. He is also either not aware of or not concerned with what is considered strictly “healthy.” Combining these makes for a rather dangerous combination and just accepting it as “oh he’s just like that, it’s who he is” or making it out to be something funny- It’s not wrong or bad by any means necessarily, and I could still possibly enjoy it to an extent depending on a series of different factors, but its- not as often. Even in the case where I do enjoy reading it however, I would still feel uncomfortable sharing it with or recommending it to others because in the first instance it feels like normalizing a destructive and dangerous mindset, and in the second case it does the same while simultaneously making a joke of it. It’s the same deal with Venti or other characters rolling with it, but that’s probably gonna be mentioned later too. Not to say that this is a “wrong” way to handle it, that it makes the fic bad, or that authors even are normalizing anything by doing so, just that in my specific instance- not a fan.

I’ll get to the others when i talk more about Venti, but for now: It’s the focus of the story. I think I saw like... 2? where the story was like- focused on this and why its a problem which- power to them, address those real world problems like a boss- but also i wouldn’t actively seek it out or anything- like, good job, but doing so just leaves it open neutrally for other factors to decide how good a story i think it is.

not directly addressed but shown to be destructive. You’d think i wouldn’t like this- but frankly in fanfiction not everyone wants to address every character flaw verbally because it can through off story, narration, dialogue, and general flow to do so. This can be with an event, an action, a dialogue, a mere comment, making it actually fit into the it’s actually addressed category except that its- subtle enough to make its own category. plus i live for show not tell- in everything- its a thing. im- very much a fan of when the fics do this but the subtlety is easy to miss and its not common so-

It’s actually adressed- doesnt have to be a lot- just mention anywhere or imply anywhere that maybe idolizing someone as a god and savior and being in a relationship with them while having little knowledge of standards, emotions, relationships, or healthy behaviors in general- maybe isnt the smartest idea in the word. (”Call me Venti, not Barbatos” by itself is not enough to fit in this category tho as a note)

Now lets talk about Venti...

uh.... those who have followed me for awhile will probably already know this but... I have a lot of opinions on Venti and a pretty- “niche(?)” perception of his characterization that isn’t shared by a lot of others- so I don’t actually read as much Venti fanfic in general as you might expect because I often end up disagreeing with how writers portray him, which again, in no way is their characterization wrong, but- “their perceived truth” conflicts with “my perceived truth” and by extent so does the characterization, though neither is any more correct than the other from an objective point of view, if that makes sense... but anyways now that that’s said, moving on before this becomes a philosophy lecture, as fun as that would be for me. I’ll try to keep my “perceived truth” out of this for the first bit.

Venti’s response to this:

He rolls with it: this depends on the mood of the fanfiction. If they dont put a lot of stress on that trait of Xiao’s it totally fine but if the trait seems to be a major part of Xiao’s character, it seems like normalization once more. (more on this later)

he takes advantage of it purposely: if its an AU or something and Venti’s like a villain(i saw a few) then- villain venti isnt my cup of tea but i have no qualms. If they don’t portray Venti in a negative light while having him take advantage however that’s a bit uncomfortable to read for me because it feels like normalizing taking advantage of that mindset as well as the mindset itself. However, i did see a number of instances of Venti using it as leverage for like- self care- which i definitely have no qualms. Xiao: [insert probably destructive idolizing statement about being indebt] Venti: How bout you pay me back by actually sleeping for once smh or other variations are okay and depending on the vibe are actually a really fun dynamic as long as it doesnt turn into romanticizing or normalizing it, y’know?

Venti accidentally taking advantage of it.... I love angst- and in most of these theres a sense of guilt when he realizes- and i just think thats a lovely way of addressing the dangers of such a mindset for both sides. As long as it doesn’t keep repeating to the point of romanticization its totally cool to read in my eyes(not irl ofc). If Venti never realizes he accidentally took or is taking advantage it feels a bit like normalization, and if he does but just- doesn’t care thats- a rip.

savior!Venti...... i- i hate. the story giving off vibes that Xiao’s mindset is technically correct while Venti oh so humbly tells him to treat him as an equal like the wonderful and charitable person he is.... i just- no. of course thats over dramatizing it- I think the main thing that gives it this vibe is when Venti doesn’t seem either concerned, surprised, uncomfortable, or otherwise have a negative feeling towards Xiao’s mindset. Just- it makes the whole thing weird in my eyes when Venti doesnt really seem to have his own reason to oppose the mindset idk-

fact time!

Venti is the god of freedom. His backstory is freeing Mondstadt from a god’s tyrannical reign. His origin is a windsprite, just another breeze bringing changes for the better. His form is a nameless boy who played an instrument and then died, thus failing at his only dream and only ever accomplishing anything because of the help of others. He slept for a thousand years after the archon war to avoid putting Mond under the rule of yet another tyrannical god. He only even became a god because Andrius chose to let him. He wouldn’t have even had that chance if the nameless bard had survived, he’d remain just another wind while his friend ascended to godhood. Venti sacrifices his own power for his people’s freedom.

now that I’ve laid out a number of canon facts, time for opinions:

Venti has little to no desire to be seen as a god. He thrives in, comes from, and emphasizes a lack of superiority in quite nearly everything. The first Ragnvindir, who canonically turned his back on Venti after Decarabian’s fall, likely did so because one- he anticipated power would corrupt and Venti would soon become just another tyrannical god, two- he suspected Venti used the nameless bard in an attempt to rise to godhood, or three- idk insert other possibilities to acknowledge again that i could totally be wrong.

Look me in the eyes and tell me Venti wouldnt trade godhood for his friend in an instant. His godhood was only granted to him because his friend died and could easily serve to constantly remind him of what could have been and what he lost. Venti takes no enjoyment from being seen as superior and in my opinion, I feel that it could actually make him largely uncomfortable when his divinity and abilities as an archon get involved-

also self promotion for my favorite posts- check out #archon war era venti if thats interesting to you

so anyway Venti rolling with it or making jokes about it just doesn’t sit right with me.-

Okay! enough talking about that mindset!

idk- i have... a few/lot of other gripes and stuff or just things that kinda throw off the vibe for me but that’s the main one plus my general personal pickiness when it come to Venti fanfics- but this has gotten long enough already-

idk i just felt like rambling about it and i haven’t done a long post in a while so-

again, I love the ship and its actually one of my favorites- just the fanfic isnt my thing..... that doesn’t mean i don’t still love it and come up with a whole ton of brainrot and ideas on it tho lmao

#genshin impact #genshin xiao #genshin venti #xiaoven #genshin barbatos #opinions #discourse #? idk ill tag it just in case #dont mind my constant backtracking and justifying and repeated disclaimers-#i just have a crippling fear of being cancelled lol

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mypimpademia · 3 years

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Hi could you possibly write hc with Aizawa, Levi, Kenma, Backugo with a black female who is unmotivated and veryyy stressed? Thank you in advance if you do write this!

Aizawa x black!fem!reader, Levi x black!fem!reader, Kenma x black!fem!reader, Bakugo x black!fem!reader

TW: Swearing

Note: I'm testing all week so i felt this spiritually

Taglist: @myhoodacademia @bnhainthewoo @iiminibattlehero @ecao @nnnoya @cheerfulpeople1234 @strawberry-ice @mixxfi @soy-darcei @wolfkid22 @mythiccheroacademia @myfandemons @sheepydumpling @lilsparkyswife

AIZAWA.

This man is constantly stressed

And at this point hes use to it, so he hardly pays any mind to his own stress

But when it comes to your stress, he won't ignore it for a second

Shouta will make you tell him whats stressing you out

And once he gets it out of you, he'll do anything to help take the stress away

Pamper days where he runs you a nice bath and washes your hair for you

Takes you to get your hair done

Let's you get a mani pedi

A massage

He'll even take some of your work load or help you with what he can

Shouta will occasionally come to check up on you when he thinks your stressed

Makes sure you're taking all your breaks, eating, drinking water, and sleeping

Really just takes care of you more than himself

Not that he minds

LEVI.

Also always stressed

Much better at hiding it than anyone else, but you know he is

At first, you try to not let him know your stressed since he has a lot on his own plate

But Levi is smart enough and knows you enough to know exactly how stressed you are

Pulls you away from all your work or whatever is stressing you

Sits you down and makes you a nice cup of tea (or coffee, whatever you perfer)

Let's you tell him about everything that's stressing you

Cleans up the house and your work area so your environment is less hectic

Takes you to do some shopping

If you like getting your hair done, he'll do your hair for you (I just know he can do any hairstyle with his perfectionist ass)

When you get back to doing work or whatever you were doing, he comes in to check on you every now and then

Places a cup of tea/coffee next to you every once in awhile or just straight up pulls you away from your work to have a drink break

KENMA.

Kozume never really gets stressed

Just super laid-back, so he doesn't deal with too much stress

But he will help you to the best of his abilities

Hes very observant, so even if you dont say anything, he'll know you're stressed

He'll start by cleaning up his mess of a room, and wherever else in the house is messy

Will also clear up your workspace a bit

Places water and food by your desk if he realizes you haven't eaten

Its probably a super basic meal like toast, a grilled cheese, spaghetti, maybe even fast food

You might get some rotisserie chicken and rice if you're lucky

Kozume is really silent about helping you, he doesn't really know what to say to make you feel less stressed, so he feels like small gestures are the only way he can help

If it seems to get too much for you, or you've been seated at your workspace for too long, he'll pull you away to play some video games with him

Overall, he's your silent little helper, but hes helping you more than he thinks he is

BAKUGO.

Most definitely stressed all the time

So he feels your pain

He notices as soon as even a little stress helps you

So the first thing he does, is tone himself down

Stops yelling, won't randomly slam shit, all that extra stuff he be doin

The only time he yells is when hes forcing you to come eat

Makes you some good soul food (learned to cook it early on in your relationship)

Has you eat at the table so you can get away from that damn desk

Let's you rant to him

Takes you shopping when you have time, and takes you to get your nails done and get a massage

Does your hair for you (I hc that he can do box braids, twists, and goddess braids best)

Once you get back to work, he'll come and check on you to make sure your working and not getting too stressed

Pulls you out every few hours just for a break, or to eat

Gives you a lil encouragement and tells you you're doing good

Its highkey out of character for him to be so soft, but if its you then there's no telling how soft he can get

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stvrs13 · 3 years

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" I love her but she hates me "

summary: Ellie and y/n have been enemies for 2 years but they secretly have feelings for each other.

warnings: a lil smut maybe nothing to serious ( help-) , swearing

a/n: alright this is my first smut and im new to writing so no judgements! 🙌

You were walking on the snow when you saw a beanie, you picked it, realizing it belongs to the one and only ellie, your ex bestfriend, your enemy, and of course the one you have secretly have feelings for.. you sigh, debating whether or not to give it back to her but it all answers when you walk towards the corner of the street on her direction, you waved awkwardly. " hey ellie, uh i found this on the snow. " you said nervously. she glanced at dina and back to you with a serious look on her face. " what a joke " she said while getting her beanie off of your hands with a super human speed. she then walk away and dina follows her, leaving you standing on your position. mental facepalm! this was a bad idea, you thought to yourself.

You walked towards your best friend who was sitting on a bench playing with her fingers, Nancy, you sat beside her. " what happened? did she said something to you again? " she said. " uh its not biggy just found her beanie that's all. " you said, slightly frowning. Nancy notices it and asked, " hey you good there? " " actually can we talk about something? somewhere private? " you said, making an eye contact with your fav person (oh really? 😉) across you, there stood Ellie so close to Dina. You immediately lost it and walk away with your bestfriend following you.

You went at the back of a coffee shop and you both sat on the snow under a tree, looking at the dark skies, " so what's up? " she said. You started crying, tears fell free on your cheeks. " oh my gosh, are you okay? " she asked, worried. " its just that- " you hid your face on your knees, " i can't deny it, its always been her, its always. " you whisper the last part. " what do you mean? " nancy asked. " i love her nancy, i do and i just dont wanna do it anymore, i tried letting her go but fuck i cant, i cant stop thinking about her! every time i see her, i felt anger and hurt but also butterflies over my stomach, fuck this. why in the world im the only person inlove with my enemy! i hate this, but i just gotta accept the truth that she hates me, i love her but she hates me. " you said with a shaky voice. Nancy just rub your back, making you feel comfortable, she has nothing to say. to surprise to say something.

" holy fuck " ellie whispered under her breath, she was hiding behind the wall. joy filling her heart.

- 2 years ago -

" cat! look at this. " you said while standing outside the balcony. cat went into your direction. " woah " cat said with a wide eyes. you both saw a beautiful view of the mountains. " its pretty " " i know rig- " just before you could finish your sentence

a stalker came out of the other door and push you to the railings. you stabbed it with your pocket knife but its still alive, it keeps pushing you harder on the railing, " cat help me! " you yell. cat tried to stab it with her switchblade but before she could stab it, the stalker push you down, you hold onto cat but you three fall off the balcony. " shit!! " you yell. you land on your back while cat land on her elbow. the stalker was above you, you stab it again and again until you heard a gunshot, the bullet hit on the stalker's head. it falls on your side, leaving you breathless. you looked at cat who's trying hard to stand and you looked at the person who shot the stalker's head, its ellie. you quickly got up and help cat up. as she stands up, she wince. " my elbow broke " she winced again. ellie walks towards the both of you and says, " what the fuck y/n?! " she practically yells at you. you stood there, nothing to say until you felt a fist on your face. Ellie punched you. you were in shocked but you ran away and ride on your horse. " fuck you!! " ellie yells. Ellie and Cat followed you, ellie is mad at you right now even though cat telling her its not your fault. As you arrived at jackson, you wiped away the tears and the blood dripping on your nose. You dismounted your horse and take it back to the stables. You pet your horse awhile and as you turn around, you were slammed on the ground.

" motherfucker! why did you pull her with you?! " ellie yells. " its not her fault ellie. " cat says. " i- im sorry i didn't mean to- " " bullshit " ellie was about to punch you again when maria and joel stop her. tommy helps you up, blood dripping your nose and a black eye. great. tears falling down from your eyes as ellie look at you with anger in her green eyes. maria, cat and ellie went into maria and tommy's office to talk. while joel and tommy helps you clean your face. once you were done, you three went to maria, joel and tommy left the room and now its all four of you confronting. ellie,cat,maria, and you. you felt hurt, and sad. You talked about what happened and of course ellie sometimes yells at you and maria had to stop her. as the talk went cleared. Ellie can't stop staring at you, your nervous. she has a blank face when she stares at you, Ellie wanted to talk to you, apologizing for being a dick but she's stubborn but also afraid of you rejecting her. So she just did nothing and hid on her corner. She also felt a hole in her heart for you make her feel someting more than friends even though she had a girlfriend. And that, you two never talk, hangout and even maria doesn't let you both go on patrol together so you both were hiding on your corners.

- end of flashback -

" are you sure ellie? i dont think she wo- " ellie cuts maria off by saying, " i dont care maria, just tell her we're paired for patrol. " she demands. maria just sighs in defeat as she nods. Ellie then prepares herself for patrol and something 😉

- afternoon -

" hey maria, you need me to go on patrol? " you asked. " yes and actually you'll be paired with ellie. " she hesitantly said that. You looked behind maria to see ellie leaning against the wall staring at you. " but- " " no buts, you both will go to the mountain over there. " she point out the small mountain. you sighed, why us? you thought to yourself. Maria then nods at ellie and said " keep safe " to the both of you. When she disappears, you look at ellie who is staring at you, you brought out a shy smile. she just nods then walk towards shimmer (ellie's horse) as you do the same. You both got up on your horses and went out from jackson. the entire time was quiet, it disturbs you, its so uncomfortable, its weird, you wanna get back to jackson- you were cut off of your thoughts by ellie saying " check in is inside that cabin. " you looked at her with a kind smile. she blushes, she what?! maybe just the cold wind making her face a little red. You both stay in silent until you reach a small cabin. You got off from your horse while ellie ties shimmer in a tree, you did what she did. She opens the small cabin and it reveals a cozy living room, you took both of your jackets into the couch and you look around admiring the living room while ellie was busy going somewhere inside the cabin. She saw 2 bedrooms in the hallway, she open the other one and it reveal a queen size bed, she smirked. " y/n.. come here " she growls. you walk towards the hallway, fear rising in you. what does she have to do now? you thought. you saw ellie standing on the door of a bedroom with her hand gripping the doorknob, you went inside and admire the beautiful bedroom until you heard the door slam shut. before you could even look at the door, ellie push you through the wall. gripping her hands on your waist tightly. she look into your e/c (eye color) and quickly looks at your lips, asking for permission. you slowly nod, at first you thought she was gonna kill you but oh boy your dreams are coming true. she smashed her lips onto yours, slipping her tounge on your lips, you moaned. it only fuel things up when ellie removed her upper buttons on her flannel, revealing her chest. it was a sloppy kiss, she practically throw you in the bed and got on top of you, she then kiss and suck your neck, leaving love bites, you moaned, feeling your clit throbbed under your jeans and ellie sucking your neck, gosh this is ethereal. " ellie.." she looks at you, her lips still on your neck " we cant do this. " you frowned. she stop and sits on her heels while you sat and leaned in the headboard. she looked at you, tears on your eyes, she sighs. " im sorry " you said weakly. " we shouldn't be doing this " your tears falling now on your cheeks. she put her hand on yours, you look at her, you got surprise when her eyes were filled with tears and sadness. " look y/n, i've heard what you said to nancy earlier and i can't deny that i felt the same way on you. " she paused. " but you hate me? " " actually no, this entire fucking years made me felt nothing but regret and guilt. i can't stop thinking about you, it drives me fucking crazy. " she said. you looked into her eyes again, fear and guilt shown in her gorgeous eyes. you can't believe it, ellie feels the same way. you smiled at her and said, " i love you ellie " realizing to what you said, " i love you too y/n, a lot. " she said with a wide smile on her face. " wanna finish what we've started earlier? " she smirked. you laughed and laid back while she got on top of you again, savouring every moment.

a/n: jeez that's idk anyway, sorry for not posting sooner, i've been a little busy on school and sometimes my lazy ass gets me. hope you enjoy this story! dont forget to like and reblogged for motivation 😹

@akami-senpai, @ellieswife, @gayerforelliewilliams 🌈✨

#ellie #ellie the last of us #ellie tlou #ellie williams #tlou2 #tlou ii #the last of us part two #ellie williams imagine #ellie williams x reader #ellie x reader #tlou imagines

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transparentfictioninpuns10 · 3 years

Text

Tips for people who struggle with depression, based on my own experiences

•if you have trouble washing your hair, buy a 2 in 1 shampoo/conditioner. It takes way less time to actually wash your hair and gives you the same feel as a normal wash (foams like shampoo, not like conditioner, so you just spray it out). Head and Shoulders is the brand I use and prevents dandruff.

•pt 2 of ^, if you have long hair, put your hair in a french braid once it starts getting greasy. Braids help your hair stay cleaner and carry the nutrients throughout your hair, unlike buns and ponytails, who work against gravity. You can look up tutorials on youtube, and it doesn't need to look perfect. It will help you feel better about not having clean hair, plus it looks way less greasy for a couple extra days.

•if you struggle with brushing your hair, don't sleep with your hair up! Especially if you move around a lot, you'll end up getting a rat's nest in your hair and it's a bitch and a half to get out. Take your hair out of the bun or ponytail or whatever at night, and you can throw it back up in the morning.

•pick at least one day a week to take a full shower (this includes washing your hair). It might be a pain at first, but try to make it a set schedule. If you work weekends, maybe shower every Thursdays so you're clean at work, etc.

•buy acne wipes that have some alcohol in them (makeup remover wipes work too). If you can't bring yourself to shower a lot, these are especially good. Even using them every once in awhile before bed helps you feel more clean and feels like you're doing something good. Plus it helps prevents breaking out.

•buy some Vitamin E essential oil. It's a little pricey, but super worth it. Just a few drops on your face, hands, arms, wherever helps to clean the skin, make it softer, etc. (It also helps to get rid of scar tissue)

•as far as eating, do what you're comfortable with. Don't listen to everyone saying you should try to eat super healthy when you're having a bad day if all you want are some oreos. It's okay to snack and eat junk food, just try to make sure you're eating at least one well rounded meal (some kind of produce, vegetables, fruits, stuff like that).

•if you're having a hard time staying hydrated, drink some milk. Drink milk if you're struggling to stay active to prevent your bones from weakening.

•try to get some natural light everyday, even if that's just opening your blinds a bit.

•do what your brain is saying it wants to. The majority of the time, our body knows what we need, so if your brain wants you to look at some dog pictures or read fanfics or cry your eyes out, you might feel better afterwards.

•dont be afraid to talk to people. Friends, family, even strangers. You would be surprised how many people wouldn't hesitate to help someone in need, even if that's just by having a conversation.

•try something creative. Go to the store and buy some paints, don't be afraid to get messy. Write a short story or a song or a poem. You don't have to share any of this with anyone, but try to let all of your emotions out into this things. You might not know why you're feeling the way you do, and that's okay. Just try to use non-harmful ways of letting your feeling out

•if you struggle with self harm, take a hot bath (not too hot), and just try to relax. Cry out all of your feelings if you need to. Draw on your skin, just some random doodles. Snap a rubber band against your wrist.

•find something that you can enjoy, at least a little. Read a book, or find something fun to watch.

•if you struggle with nightmares, try to fall asleep to some kind of cartoon or play a song or book. I watch Spongebob every night before I fall asleep, and if I wake up from a nightmare, I'll find a cartoon to watch until I can fall back asleep.

•if you struggle with falling asleep, it might be a good idea to find something to do other than just lie there. You can read (or listen to) a book, scroll through social media, etc. I have the app Thunder Dungeon on my phone, it's a free app that is just a shit ton of memes, and I go through that every night until I'm tired. My mom plays solitaire. If you're on your phone at night, download the app Twilight, it removes the blue light from your phone and makes the screen darker at night so it doesn't irritate your eyes and it's not so bright. (All the apps I mentioned are free in the app store).

•if you struggle with eating/staying hydrated, look at the store for anything that has chia seeds in them. They fill you up and are SUPER healthy for you. I use the "Mama Chia Chia Squeeze vitality snack". They taste really good and aren't expensive ($1 each at WinCo).

That's all that I can think of for right now, but comment things that work for you guys that might help others!

And please share this! You never know who might need to see it.

#depression help #depression hacks #depression tips

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imaginethathaikyuu · 4 years

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hi! can I request some shower hcs for kuroo, bokuto, akaashi, and kageyama? maybe some nsfw if you’re feeling spicy 👉👈

i’m hoping u mean showering with their s/o? cuz like....idk i dont wanna write abt their shower routines lmao. these are ordered from sfw to nsfw, cuz i was only feeling a little bit spicy today. also sorry they’re so uneven in length ajfkdfkdl

gender neutral reader

bokuto koutarou (sfw)

-sometimes when you’re showering, koutarou will just appear in there with you. you don’t even hear him coming, he sneaks in like a cat. you’re just peacefully rinsing yourself under the hot water, then you turn around and there’s a wild naked bokuto in the shower with you who wasn’t there previously. and when you jump because his presence caught you off guard and scared you, he’ll laugh like a maniac

-and he’ll say that he missed you and whine about not getting invited to shower with you, and you’ll say “there was a reason for that,” and he’ll act like he didn’t hear you even though you’re standing right next to him

-showering with bokuto takes infinitely longer than showering on your own. so if you’re in a rush: good luck

-he is most definitely a water hog - it’s like he doesn’t even see you standing off to the side freezing and waiting for him to share - which he won’t do unless you force him to

-koutarou loves using your shower products; it’s such a small thing but it’s something that makes him really happy. he thinks it’s cute to smell like you

-he also loves washing your hair for you, and he’s surprisingly really good at it. he’s gentle and focused and hardly knows what he’s doing but he always ends up doing a great job; eventually he gets so good at it that you begin to ask him to do it. his fingers massaging your scalp feel wonderful - the man’s got magic hands

kageyama tobio (sfw)

-tobio takes lots of showers ‘cause he gets dirty a lot - from sweaty volleyball practices and even sweatier volleyball games - so if you’re ever looking for him, the shower should be the first place you check (if he’s not there then honestly who knows where the hell he is)

-he absolutely loves when you join him, but of course he’s incredibly shy at first; he tells you “don’t look!” and his eyes are constantly averted to the side or up at the ceiling. he really enjoys having your company, but it’s hard for you to tell because he literally keeps his back turned to you the majority of the time

-but one evening, he gets home and he’s in such an obvious slump that you feel your heart ache just looking at him. and for the first time, he was the one who asked you to join him in the shower - every time before this, you were the one who made the offer. of course you said yes, despite being caught off guard, and when you were under the falling water together, he pulled you close. almost as if he was inspired by the downpour of hot water, his words seemed to pour out of him; he told you about his bad day, his shitty practice, all of his annoying teammates, his asshole of a coach, and the long list of self doubts he had - he told you them as if he was trying to convince you to doubt him, too, and even though it was hard not to interrupt, you stood in his arms and listened, polite and patient

-and when he was finished, he listened just as patiently to you explaining to him why all those self doubts are wrong. and the water would get cold soon, you knew that, but you couldn’t leave that shower without showing him as much love as you possibly could; you wouldn’t be satisfied until you got to admire every inch of him; you weren’t going anywhere until he knew how great he was

-and doing this became somewhat of a habit; multiple times a week when tobio gets home from practice or a game, he’ll invite you to the shower with him and you get all your body worshipping out of your system. your hands roam as they please as you do him the favor of washing his body, and he absolutely loves the time of being loved on and cared for

akaashi keiji (mild)

-the two of you rarely shower together, because keiji prefers to shower before work in the mornings and he’s got his routine down to a strict science, so there really isn’t time for you to join him then

-but sometimes after a date night or a long night out with friends, one of you will lead the other to the shower - usually it’s akaashi dragging you there. sometimes he needs a hot shower to finish the night, and he just has to have that shower with you. especially if you’re getting home from a romantic night - he’s never ready for those sweet nights to end, and there’s nothing more romantic than undressing each other and taking a steaming shower together. keiji is a stickler for romance and will find any excuse to prolong passion

-typically, it’s a long shower filled with slow kisses and whispered i love you’s; sometimes it’s foreplay for what happens in the bedroom - or on the bathroom counter - later. and other times it’s just that, simple loving and no judging, a way to relax with each other without having to do a thing. moments shared in the shower are some of akaashi’s favorites

kuroo tetsurou (nsfw)

-showering together is pretty routine for you two. kuroo always says “why waste water when we can just shower together?” and he does have a point. at first there’s a lot of fumbling around, and it’s honestly pretty awkward, but after awhile the two of you get really good at showering together and develop a shower routine

-and once you two do get good at it, that leaves a lot of extra time for doing other things!

-but those things just end up being, you guessed it, awkward and clumsy. neither of you know what to do with your hands or where to put your feet. tetsurou hits your head on the wall at least half a dozen times. everything is slippery and the chances of falling are way too high for your liking. it’s like you’re both virgins all over again. shower sex isn’t even half as fun as everyone makes it out to be, and it’s frustrating for both of you

-but tetsurou is persistent, and so, by extension, you are as well. he wants it to be as good and hot and steamy as everyone says it is; you just want to have a good time. so kuroo does research (watches porn) and the two of you practice a lot, which leads to a lot of… learning…

-he’ll be kissing your neck and feeling you up before you can even finish washing yourself, but tetsurou doesn’t care. he wants you up against the wall, hands pressed against the tile, his chest to your back and your hips the perfect handles to hold onto; he wants you on your knees, taking his length in your mouth, not caring how the water is pouring down onto you; he wants your legs around his waist, moving your hips to meet his every thrust, kissing his neck and leaving as many marks on his skin as you want

-it may be obvious, but with a lot of trial and error, the two of you completely master every aspect of showering together

#look at me finally answering a request for the first time in forever #see i still know how to write other peoples ideas rather than my own dumb ones!#akaashi keiji #bokuto koutarou #kageyama tobio #kuroo tetsurou #akaashi keiji x reader #bokuto koutarou x reader #kageyama tobio x reader #kuroo tetsurou x reader #not family friendly #haikyuu imagines #haikyuu x reader #headcanons #hcs

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thechangeling · 3 years

Text

Enough.

So a while ago I made a headcannon post about Ty's sexuality and the autistic exploration of sex and sexual desire. I have now written a fic about it. This ones for Alex @bedspells my very own Alyssa. Also side note I want to make it clear that yes, I still ship kitty 100%. But I've seen plenty of people write fics and headcannons about Kit exploring things with other people. There's no reason why Ty can't do the same.

Edit: Ok a long time ago this fic actually got a hate comment on Ao3 saying that I was erasing Ty's sexuality by having him hook up with a girl because he was cannonly gay due to a tweet CC made in 2013. Now I don't even have twitter and I wasn't a part of the fandom back then. Despite all of that I actually don't really consider that to be the basis of canon? And in the books he doesn't really express interest in anyone except for Kit. So as far as I'm concerned this was fair game. Not to mention gay people sometimes experiment before they realize they're gay. Especially autistic people!! And that was actually kind of the point of this fic. So maybe just keep that in mind going forward. Thanks!

Tw for mentions and discussions of sex.

Ty could count the instances he hadn't been bothered by another person's touch on one hand. This was certainly one of them. It was so late into the night it could certainly be considered the next morning. Anush, Ty and Alyssa had been doing research on Livvy and the effect she seemed to be having on a serge of demonic activity in the area.

Ty was fairly stressed about the possibility to say the least. It felt like everything was spilling away from him. Livvy, his family, his career.

Kit.

He really didn't want to think about Kit but it was difficult. It was like trying to ignore a bleeding wound that everyone kept referring to as a paper cut.

The shining lights in all of this were Anush and Alyssa. Befriending both of them had been the best part of coming to the scholomance.

Especially Alyssa.

Meeting someone who shared some of his thoughts, feelings and experiences was more then refreshing. It was liberating. Talking, laughing and crying with Alyssa about the things that no one else would understand was like a balm for Ty's soul.

At a certain point Anush had announced that he was retiring to bed and they should both probably do the same. Livvy was still floating around the room observing their work. But as time went on Ty had stopped paying as much attention to her. Now he was resting against Alyssa with his head in her lap. She was sitting on the couch in the library, carefully running her fingers through his hair and rambling on about something, Ty wasn't exactly sure what.

Ty reached up to wrap a lock of her long dark hair around his finger, then watched it spring back into place again. Alyssa's hair was wavy but not curly like- like some peoples. So it didn't spring and bounce very well. That was the interesting thing about Ali in general. So many parts of her dress and appearance were so neat and polished and well put together that Ty almost wondered what it would be like to see her more disheveled. What would it be like to grab and twist and pull until she was left with something that wasn't glossy perfect waves.

Ty panicked a little at that thought. Where exactly had that come from? He was now more then ever painfully aware of the fact that he was lying in an attractive person's lap. And his sister was still in the same room.

Ty looked up to search for Livvy but realized that she was gone. Guiltily he realized she could have been gone for awhile now. But he hadn't noticed. Lately he had been feeling further and further away from his twin and he hated it.

"Do you think stars have feelings?" Alyssa asked wistfully. Ty laughed joyfully, feeling so light and and so far away from every bad thing that had happened three years ago.

"Because I was just thinking," she continued. "Like, what if they're lonley you know?" Ty had to smile at the Alyssa charm of it all. Also the autistic perspective might have had something to do with it.

"I don't know," Ty said, sitting up. "Maybe they're like us. Maybe they like being alone." Alyssa pondered this for awhile.

"Well no one can be alone forever," she pointed out, then laughed, rolling her eyes. "God how did we get here? Remember when we were supposed to be doing actual work Ty?"

"Well we were stupid to think that would last," Ty announced matter of factly. Alyssa shrugged and leaned back against the sofa.

"Probably. Once the neurotypical left it was all downhill from there."

"I disagree, Ty said softly, meeting her gaze. "I enjoy spending time with you." Alyssa instantly smiled, the kind of beautiful, honest, heartfelt smile that allistic people wrote poetry about.

Instantly Ty was reminded of someone else, another brilliant smile.

He shook it off.

"Me too," Alyssa finally answered. Then she shook her head. "Ugh feelings. Gross."

Ty rolled his eyes at her and laughed.

Then Alyssa sat up again as she seemed to remember something. "Oh yeah I meant to ask you about Anush. Do you like him?"

Ty shrugged. "Yeah he's really nice. He's become a good friend."

Alyssa shook her head. "No, no Ty, I mean-" She paused. "I mean do you like him like you wanna date him? Or do you have romantic feelings for him?" She asked.

Ty paused. He honestly wasn't sure. He had been trying to avoid thoughts of those types of feelings for a very specific reason. A Herondale reason. But the truth was he did like really like Anush. He enjoyed being around him. Ty just wasn't sure what that meant.

"I'm not sure," he answered honestly. "Maybe." Alyssa fiddled with her hair, rubbing it between her fingers.

"Hmm. Well do you even like boys?" She asked. "I just realised I've known you for five months now and I dont really know what your deal is," she said contemplating. "Like sexual orientation wise. I mean not that it matters, it totally doesn't," she stammered.

Ty shrugged. "It was never really relevant before. But I'm not really sure. I guess I'm fine with whatever." Alyssa beamed.

"So I guess that means you're kinda like me huh? She said happily. "I'm pansexual. Women are so beautiful and angelic and soft and squishy and awesome, but men can be good too," she mused. "I mean men are......men, but some of them aren't so bad. I mean look at you!" Alyssa tossed her hair back over her shoulder.

"Thanks," Ty responded dryly.

"Anyways you know what I mean," Alyssa waved her hand. "So are you attracted to him at least?" Ty sighed.

"Yeah I am," he admitted. "But I don't- I don't want a relationship Ali. I just can't."

Alyssa studied him for a moment. "Does this have anything to do with the Herondale pendent you wear that you always tell me never to ask questions about?"

Ty scowled. "Yes, but I don't want to talk about it." Alyssa rolled her eyes and put her hands up in surrender.

"Fucking shit fuck! Fine!" She complained. "Anyways, my point is you dont need to date him neccesarily. Just have sex with him and see how you feel?"

Ty sat up and faced her. "What?"

Alyssa laughed. "You heard me. There's nothing wrong with causal sex between consenting adults. I mean, if you want to."

Ty felt the urge to stand up to try and aliviate some of the anxiety he was feeling, but he stayed sitting.

"I've never done it before," he admitted. Ty was 19, he knew most of the people his age had already had some sort of sexual experience. But he had always been too afraid. Too afraid of people touching him and demanding things from him with harsh vague bullshit. In Ty's mind it was just another social interaction that he could screw up and then pay the price for it.

Alyssa shrugged. "It's no big deal. Virginity is just a social construct anyways." Alyssa was playing with her hair casually and biting her lip slightly, to indicate that she was mulling something over.

Ty shook his head trying to explain it. "No, it's- I mean see, you say that, but, one of the things I've learned about this world is that social constructs kind of matter to a lot of people." Ty was taping his fingers against his leg and trying to stop himself from shaking. Alyssa noticed this.

"Because people tell you that's it's no big deal and not to worry, and then other people make it into a big deal like it means something, and then everyone's telling you to do something different," Ty explained with a panicked, rushed voice. "I don't know who you listen to, or what to do!" He was moving his hands frantically while he spoke to emphasize his points.

"Hey it's ok," she cooed, inching towards him. "Trust yourself. Or if you feel like you can't, then trust me." Ty felt a pang in his chest. A cacophony of conflicting emotions erupted within him. But mostly he found that despite his better judgement he actually believed her.

They had created something different between the two of them. Something that almost transcended labels or rules or traditional allistic boundaries. Alyssa was like the armor he put on every morning, with the strength and confidence that he wasn't alone in this world. In the midst of all of their jokes and late night heartbreaking conversations. In the midst of this fragile peace they had created, there was something there. Something indescribable.

Something like the sound of the page being turned in one of his Sherlock novels, or the sound of their favourite songs. A connection. A lifeline.

Ty looked over at Alyssa's concerned face and smiled softly. "I trust you," he promised. "I don't really trust many people, but I've always trusted you," he admitted. Alyssa inhaled sharply. She made an interesting facial expression that might have been a facial stim and then gaped for awhile before finally closing her mouth and avoiding Ty's gaze.

"Yeah that's cool. I trust you too," she said casually. She had gone back to pulling at her poor hair which was shedding everywhere. Anush always joked that he could always tell where Alyssa was by following the trail of hair.

"So, about the whole sex thing," she continued rather unceremoniously. Ty had to laugh a little. "Do you think it's something you're actually interested in? Or do you just feel like you have to?" She asked.

Ty pondered this for a moment. "I think I might want to. I just want to be with someone that I trust. Someone who will be considerate of my boundries, you know?" Ty did a quick glance around the room to make sure Livvy was still gone.

"Wait she's not here right?" Alyssa asked anxiously, catching on. Ty shook his head.

Alyssa paused for a moment, looking lost in thought. She was flicking her fingernails against each other and continuing to murder her bottom lip by chewing on it. Finally she looked up at him, looking rather amused.

"Ok. This might just be the exhaustion talking, or the autism, or a combination of both. So if you feel uncomfortable with what I'm about to say, then afterwards we can just forget it ok?" Alyssa sounded serious. Ty just nodded, trying not to be concerned.

Alyssa gave him an interesting look, one that he was pretty sure he had never recieved before. Her eyes scanned him up and down, then she smirked.

"I could potentially offer my services," she said innocently. Ty blinked a few times, then continued to stare at her. She stared back unflinching.

Wait. What?

Ty shook his head in confusion. "Hold on. Wait. You mean-?" He cut himself off. Alyssa nodded with that same smirk. "Yeah I mean why not right?" She shrugged, relaxing back against the sofa. "But if you dont want to then that's totally fine."

"Wait." Ty attempted to clear his head and stay focused. He stayed frozen for awhile, thinking. Then he folded his arms around himself, applying pressure. "Why exactly?"

Alyssa shrugged again. "Well why not? You're hot. I'm hot, and besides you know me," she pointed out. She paused, and then giggled.

"Four hours into investigating the paranormal phenomenon of his dead twin sister and chill, then she offers to take his virginity," she cackled. "I so enjoy our quality time together."

"The way your mind works really concerns me sometimes, you know that?" He asked playfully. Alyssa rolled her eyes at him and shoved him gently.

"Hey you don't have to, it was just an idea," she said, raising her hands in defense. Ty was silent. He was still thinking about it.

"Most people don't really do stuff like this right?" He asked warily. "Like most friends don't just randomly hook up and then laugh it off later."

Alyssa shook her head slowly. "Honey do you see me laughing?"

Ty was conflicted. There was something in him, a new, complicated feeling. A burning desire that nagged at the back of his mind everytime Alyssa bit her lip or pouted.

If he was really honest with himself. Ty could remember another time when he felt this way. But that was different, that was-.

He shook his head. No. Ty wasn't thinking about that anymore. He needed a distraction.

"God I can practically hear you thinking over here Ty," Alyssa teased. "Listen. If it freaks you out to much then we can forget about it. But-." She paused and reached towards him. Their fingertips met and she slowly dragged her fingertips down the top of Ty's hand.

"I want to do this for you because I care about you," she said solemnly. "I want make you feel good. Because you're special, and I dont mean that in the bullshit ableist way. I mean I think that you're special because you have such a big heart and you care so much," she said with a laugh.

Ty felt like he was about to cry. He was taking in long deep breaths trying not to get overwhelmed. He didnt know how to respond to this, this kind of attention and praise. His heart felt warm and tight absorbed in so much fondness and melancholy and regret all at once.

He knew this wasn't anything like what had happened that day on the beach. This wasn't that kind of love that he was feeling for Alyssa and that was a good thing. Romantic love, he decided, was too complicated.

"You deserve good things and good experiences. You deserve to have your first time be somewhere familiar. Somewhere you feel safe, and with someone who loves you." Alyssa wiped her eyes on the back of her hand.

"God sorry for getting all emotional like that," she joked.

Ty couldn't speak, so he just squeezed her hand. He hoped she would understand.

I love you too.

Ty took a breath, then nodded. "Yeah," he admitted. "Yeah I want that. I want you."

Alyssa exhaled, then grinned. "Ok then. Great. I'll see if I can pencil you in sometime this week," she joked. Ty cocked his head to the side in confusion.

"Oh," he murmered, suprised with how disappointed he felt. "You mean later?" Alyssa laughed.

"Well yeah, I mean aren't you tired?"

"Are you?" Ty countered.

Alyssa shrugged. "Hey you know how it is, autistic sleep cycle. I'm gonna be up for awhile. I just figured you might want some time to think."

Ty shook his head. "No I don't want to think anymore. I'm tired of thinking Ali. I'm tired of worrying and overanalyzing everything." His eyes met hers, she seemed a little worried.

She moved closer to him so that she was practically in his lap. "You need a distraction," she said matter of factly. "It's ok." She moved her hands from his arms to grasp his waist.

"Is this good?"

Ty flinched. "More pressure," he replied in a tone that was hopefully not too demanding. Alyssa pressed her fingertips down harder into his skin. A soothing feeling washed over him.

"Good?" She asked, scratching his skin with her fingernails. Ty just nodded, feeling slightly dazed.

Alyssa smiled, lowering herself gracefully into his lap. Everything she did was with precision and grace. Alyssa was a dancer. It was one of her special interests. She had stopped taking lessons a long time ago though because she found it challenging to dance in a group.

She could never copy what everyone else was doing exactly on count when she was supposed to. She was always going off and improvising on her own. There was probably a metaphor in there somewhere.

Alyssa's weight against him was comforting. She was moving her hands up and down his back underneath his shirt while still applying pressure. Ty felt heat beginning to pool in the base of his stomach. He stared at her curiously, taking in her soft curves and her smooth golden skin.

"Can I touch you?" Ty asked, feeling his fingers twitch.

Alyssa moved her hands to his chest. "Sure." She said softly. "Just be careful. Remember pressure and all of that, and try to avoid my stomach area. For some reason it's really sensitive." Ty nodded, instantly reaching for her long wavy dark hair and twisting his fingers around it, pulling slightly. She laughed.

This drew Ty's attention to her mouth. Her lips were cracked and rough looking from Alyssa constantly biting them, but Ty still wanted to kiss her. He had never kissed anyone before. He needed to know what it felt like.

He moved his hands to her shoulders and then to her sides, pulling Alyssa even closer. "Can you teach me how to kiss?" He asked looking her in the eye briefly. She snorted.

"I don't think you'll like it very much," she murmered. "It's not really a good sensory experience. At least not for me. Allistic people seem to like it though."

Ty nodded. "Exactly that's my point," he said, using one hand to cradle the side of her neck. "I need to learn for other people later on." He absentmindedly pressed his thumb into one of the divots in her neck, just to fill the space. Alyssa sighed and dug her fingernails into his chest.

"Ok fine but you're gonna hate the tounge thing," she breathed. She leaned down very slowly and then carefully pressed her lips to Ty's, kissing him softly.

It was a weird sensation but not entirely unpleasant. Ty happily slid his hands back into her hair and began to fiddle with a few thick pieces. Alyssa moved her own hands up his chest to cradle her face, applying pressure with thumbs against his cheekbones.

Alyssa deepened the kiss and slid her tounge into his mouth. Instantly Ty winced and felt every cell in his body seize up. But he didn't stop. He was determined to figure this out. If he wanted to kiss someone who wasn't autistic in the future then he would need to. Ty relaxed his body and kissed her back forcefully, making out with Alyssa until the uncomfortable noise in his head was too much and he broke the kiss.

Ty shook his head and Ali laughed, stroking his hair. "I fucking told you so," she exclaimed. Ty shut his eyes and allowed his breathing to return to normal.

"Ok so that's something we can forget about for now, thank god. The beauty of this whole situation is that we dont have to follow any allistic script for this sort of thing." Ty opened his eyes. Alyssa was watching him carefully, still only centimeters away from his face.

"So is there anything you want to do?" She asked him. "Just tell me and I'll see if we can make it happen."

Ty saw no need to maintain any sort of filter. "Well there are a lot of things actually, but for some reason I really want to bite you," he said pointedly, glancing down at her neck. Alyssa burst out laughing, nearly falling over.

Ty glared at her. "I'm sorry," she gasped breathlessly. "I'm sorry it's just,-," she regained her composure, shaking her head. "I just love how we all used to be the weird kids who growled and hissed at people on the playground if they bothered us and now as adults we're just super kinky. Like it's kind of poetic in a way," she laughed.

Ty rolled his eyes. There was no need to ask what she meant by we. When Alyssa said we, it only referred to one thing.

"I'm sure it's not absolutely every autistic person," he protested. "Also we should move, on account of the fact that this is still a public setting." Alysza's eyes widened as if she had just remembered that.

"Oh right. Shit, as if these people needed any more reasons to hate me. Let's go!" She rolled off of Ty and stood in front if him, holding out her hand. "We can use my room." Ty stayed sitting, taking a moment to fully absorb it all.

He couldn't help but feel the weight of the Herondale pendent against his chest as a heavy reminder. He willed himself not to get distracted. Alyssa smiled at him slightly, almost as if she knew.

"Enough," she said softly.

Ty didn't know what to say to that. He wasn't even sure if their was anything he wanted say. Then finally he understood.

"Enough," he echoed back.

He took her outstretched hand and let her take him away.

@ti-bae-rius @eutony-in-whisper @dianasarrow @dianasarrow @stxr-thxif @talia-lightwood @doitforthecarstairs @thelandunderthehilll @zfoxdraws @waterlillies

#tda #the dark artifices #tsc #twp #the wicked powers #ty blackthorn #Alyssa Reyes #autistic representation #Fae's oc

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bilbao-song · 3 years

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heres an ask because i too am desperate to engage with people. i know u dont care about roxy music but you did say you would accept something as incoherent as a keysmash so here is an equivalent: admittedly i find the dynamics between ANY band and their fans very interesting, but roxy music in particular. there is a peculiar divide between those who are staunch bryan ferry fans (these people typically dont give half of a shit about anyone else in the band), those who are fans of the group as a whole and dont particularly care about individual members at all, and those who are most interested in phil manzanera and andy mackay and sometimes the other guys, who generally quite dislike bryan (i being the latter)- and often there is resentment between the groups. i think its so interesting that a group of people can be presented with the same exact material, love it and enjoy it for years, and yet latch onto different parts of it and make it such a part of their identity that should you confuse one with the other they become insulted, or if nothing else will tell you "no no, i like roxy music but i REALLY like bryan, i think hes the best", or "no no, i love roxy music and im a fan of andy and phil in particular but i dont care for byran much at all, dont get it twisted", etc. are there bands you're more familiar with who have this sort of divide amongst the fanbase? do tell me about them, if you like :>

first of all i absolutely love that u sent this ksdhgkshg this is like. exactly the kind of thing i wanted

sorry for taking 39485949 years to post this lmao. i wrote like FIVE entire paragraphs and then had to edit it but it was getting super late and anyway it’s still absurdly long (as in, i can say whatever i want in the below text bc no one is going to want to read it) and definitely devolved into a huge general rant about the annoying and creepy behaviors of some people within band fanbases (specifically ELO-related bc of course) as well as vagueing about my own controversial opinions but......nonetheless.

anyway!!! i find this kind of thing really interesting too!! and i know EXACTLY what you’re talking about. there are just sooo many facets to this, and i guess it’s different for every band. on the one hand i do think it’s kind of an interesting phenomenon bc if you think about it, they’re basically enjoying the same thing but taking wildly different/opposing stances on it. as a whole i would find it a lot more interesting/amusing and less frustrating if people could like...manage these kinds of differences without turning it into some kind of overly vitriolic/super hostile opposition that you would think is about politics or something and not a band we r supposed to be listening to for entertainment purposes. i mean, i 100% get that things don’t have to be Extremely Important to be worth discussing, but it just seems wild the way some people get SO intensely angry about these things, sometimes to the point of being kind of inappropriate. i have a lot of issues with the way some people within band fanbases tend to behave lol

.......anyway the Full Rant is below here (idk why i wrote this bc it’s long enough to be turned in for a grade and it’s only partially relevant. read at ur own risk):

so!! thankfully with most bands i enjoy i just kind of watch the fanbase from the sidelines and don't get too involved in or even aware of all the drama. like...i know about the band and enjoy the music but just manage to not get involved in whatever the community happens to be collectively freaking out about at any given moment. i feel like the kind of divide you mentioned is actually pretty common within band fanbases (i think there are things like this with like...styx and three dog night? among others? but i don't know all the details 👀) but like, FORTUNATELY with most of them i just would not know. that's very nice because i unfortunately do not always have that kind of luxury with the ELO fanbase...idk i have a lot of very strong ELO-related opinions that i usually don't like to discuss in great detail bc i get disproportionately frustrated but yeah basically what you described does kind of happen among ELO fans, although thankfully i'd say it's to a somewhat lesser extent? people are commonly at each other's throats about a variety of topics including (but not limited to) who they support or don't support, but there are still plenty of people who (thankfully) are not so aggressive lmao. there is sort of a divide within the fanbase but i feel like it's probably not so 50/50 as what you're talking about...maybe more like 85/15

THAT SAID, i have frequently commented on the fact that the ELO fanbase is largely a dumpster fire and there is a whole entire sector of the fanbase that is comprised of people who i absolutely cannot stand, and most of them do fight a lot lmao. this is only partially related to the subject at hand, but a good portion of the bickering is relevant to The Divide. like, i'm 100% okay with having a different opinion than someone else as long as they aren't acting like a complete freak about it, but idk, aside from the fact that most of these people are like?? needlessly aggressive?? there are certain opinions held by certain members of the Greater ELO Community that just give me that vibe of like...hmmmm this is a person i probably would not want to associate with at all, even in matters completely unrelated to this. Unsavory Person Vibes. i mean like, “opinions” that just boil down to "i am very very entitled and also incapable of seeing anyone else's perspective on literally anything ever BUT that isn't going to stop me from openly whining about this absolutely whenever possible." like!! it's one thing to have some kind of legitimate, reasonable criticism of an individual or band but some, if not most, of the things i've seen people losing their minds over within this fanbase have been so hilariously trivial that i just CANNOT understand how these people actually managed to get to be (presumably) functional adults who are probably like 50+ years old. i mean like, full-blown tantrums and calling someone all sorts of nasty things over something that shouldn't even be an issue because without exaggerating i cannot fathom how anyone could even be majorly upset about it in the first place. to give an example: someone once had a whole entire little strongly-worded, excessively presumptuous freakout because a guitar was no longer on loan to the rock and roll hall of fame. like...it was there for quite awhile and two out of four inductees loaned absolutely nothing but you're whining because one who DID loan something eventually took it back? do we not know what the word "loan" means? anyway the best part is that basically every time something like this happens, if someone tries to point out that the person is overreacting or perhaps just needs to look at a situation another way, they will then go off on that person bc god forbid we try to be level-headed about things. everything has to be Very Horrible All The Time or we’re doing something wrong or being stupid or something. idk i'm convinced that some people just want to be angry

also just...some of these people do some really shady things that i personally feel are morally questionable but there's nothing i can do about it so i try to just kind of avoid dwelling on it lmfao. like, it's not okay to violate people's privacy just because they're famous and you're overly entitled/nosy/desperate for clout/blatantly trying to profit off of them? i know in the Sane World that's a completely non-controversial idea but band fanbases apparently often aren't based on sanity skhglkshgks idk i could probably write a small novel on this and make a specific list of all the things they do that are just like...bafflingly tone deaf and kind of appalling but i digress. idk the worst part to me is the way they'll be like, saying/doing something that's just awful or like, maybe even totally factually wrong while acting like they're in the right. absolutely wild

to at least somewhat bring this back to what we were ATTEMPTING to talk about!!! personally i've reached a point where i pretty much no longer care about like 90% of anyone who has ever been in ELO (jeffrey/richard/roy/mike de albuquerque supremacy) but i'm not like, actively a Hater of the others lmao. i appreciate that they were there and enjoy the nostalgia(? i wasn’t alive) of it and i’m glad they’re out there existing but i just...don’t really care about anything they do at this point?? a good portion of it is a result of me taking issue with certain things some of them have done, which has impacted the way i feel about them, but MOST of it is really not that deep and it’s just that some of them just don't particularly interest me on that kind of level/i don't feel the need to get that invested in like 927509257 different people (fun fact: during the 1970s every third person in existence on earth was, at least briefly, a member of ELO). there's really only one ELO-adjacent person who i actually very strongly dislike and a) luckily i feel like they barely even count as a member b) the reasoning is kind of its own Thing and has very very very little to do with anything related to the band so it's kind of another subject entirely. anyway that’s as close as i’ll ever get to actually getting involved with any of the Drama sgsdgsdgfhdh. my primary beef is with the fanbase anyway because, as previously mentioned, there are too many insane people. i guess what i’m getting at here is that yeah there’s a divide and it does affect me BUT i also don’t really get why people allow this to make them act in a way that goes beyond just having a difference in opinion and is so overly hostile towards each other as well as the people they’re discussing. like...if anyone involved is a serial killer or something even remotely similar then yeah, being outraged on an extreme level and absolutely hating them even as an outsider makes sense. otherwise? calm down!!!!!

anyway. to wrap up this mostly incoherent rant that i hope no one read: i have always suspected that band fandoms kind of attract certain kinds of very distressingly weird people and i just think it's funny how there's always like, a little cluster of people within the fanbase who basically seem like they actually hate the band (those are almost always the Weird Ones bc i can’t tell you how many times i’ve witnessed a person who is like, into a band to a CREEPY extent and then one day they just flip and become a hater). at that point i'm just like, okay? so why are you still here lmfao. i guess that's the Main Idea of all of this lol. i just don't get why these people stick around when 98% of all they ever do is complain and act overly judgy? i just feel like if my so-called favorite band was making me that miserable i would try to find another band to like instead of becoming a menace to society. that’s just me tho

to bring all of this together i guess i just assume that some kind of phenomenon like this occurs within basically every band fanbase. idk it just seems pretty universal for some reason. certain kinds of people just love drama i guess and will turn any difference of opinion into some kind of shitshow

tl;dr: yes

#every time i talk about this sort of thing i think about how my mom joined some of the elo facebook groups #and after a few weeks she was like omg!!! you were right!!! they're crazy!!! they're FIGHTING with each other!!!#sadly the facebook ppl are actually pretty tame compared to what can be found lurking in other corners of the internet #anyway this mostly just turned into me vagueing about my beef with the elo fanbase again but it's hard not to go there sdhglkhsdgl #also i feel like with a lot of things that cause Controversy within band fandoms it's just like #people getting so angry over things that don't affect them and that the actual people involved aren't even that concerned about anymore #AND ppl assuming they have the whole story on a particular issue when oftentimes it's likely that they don't #whether it's bc the information just isn't out there or because certain sources are obviously going to slant things in their favor #which is not inherently a problem bc of course people have different perspectives but you just can't forget that that's a thing #idk i have.....so many very strong opinions but the idea of being specific about it in a conversation gives me hives #metaphorical hives #anyway thank you for sending this bc i am literally always waiting to rant about weird ppl within band fandoms #eddie-riff

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winterswhumpblr · 2 years

Text

I posted 257 times in 2021

17 posts created (7%)

240 posts reblogged (93%)

For every post I created, I reblogged 14.1 posts.

I added 63 tags in 2021

#whump community - 12 posts

#whumplist - 10 posts

#whump list - 10 posts

#whumpblr - 8 posts

#john murphy - 5 posts

#the 100 - 5 posts

#whump - 5 posts

#mortel netflix - 3 posts

#mortel - 3 posts

#chris halliwell - 2 posts

Longest Tag: 25 characters

#i dont know what im doing

My Top Posts in 2021

How have I not seen a single whump list for John Murphy from the 100. As a character he goes through so much, and Richard Harmon, the actor who plays Murphy, literally does such an amazing job at portraying everything poor Murphy goes through.

Might just re-start the show and make one myself. Who knows, it might become the first list in my folder I’ll actually post<3

{there is one one the whumapedia page I believe, but there’s nothing on tumblr with the good gifs :,}

5 notes • Posted 2021-11-05 08:12:26 GMT

I just finished the French show, “Mortel” and I cannot physically bring myself to do or consume any other kind of content. It’s literally all I can think about: the found family the main 3 have with each other, the different t r a u m a s they have and how they work through it. The magical aspect with some exhaustion and literally AMAZING acting all around.

If I could bring myself to do anything besides thinking about this show, I would write a fanfic about Victor and the Mary Poppins bag of trauma he has. Or I’d create a video edit dedicated to their story, the highs and the lows.

It’s literally five am why have I done this to myself xx

But yeah maybe whump list coming soon if I can wipe my tears away long enough to rewatch the show<33

6 notes • Posted 2021-11-16 04:18:15 GMT

Out of sheer boredom I created a one shot Peter Pan AU. Wendy’s a teenage writer who currently lives alone; Peter is her childhood friend, let the fluffy romance commence!

She sighed closing her book and moving the blankets over her shoulders, the winds breeze had chilled her to the bone. She looked out her window, the city looks so pretty at night-time she thought, her apartment was on the highest floor of her block, so she had the best Birdseye view of The city of London. Her home away from home, it reminded her a lot of her first home, back in New York City.

She smiled as she thought back to her fondest memories in the states. She wished she could go back there one last time, but as the first rain droplets fell from the sky, she was reminded why that would never happen. She moved from her spot on the single bed to lean against her window sill, she reached out and opened her sliding window as far as it would go, keen on listening to the rain fall.

She sat there in silence for awhile, her head rested on her hands which were being propped by her elbows that dug into the wooden ledge. The rain poured on and she could feel the spark of her creativity flow through her once more. She turned her head towards her bedside table where a leather discarded notebook lay underneath her fathers old fountain pen.

She ignored the pain that erupted in her chest as she grabbed both items, she didn’t want to think about that now; her fingers were itching to write. She opened the bookmarked page and read over what she had written last, it was a simple story about a love sick girl who wished she could stay young forever and a heartbroken boy who longed for a future where he could call her his.

She didn’t think too much about the words she was drawing with ink as she wrote, she let magic do it’s thing, it could be corrected later on. As the rain poured and she released her thoughts into her writing she swore she could hear footsteps come from outside.

She looked around her plain bedroom, the door was closed, her wheeled chair dormant beside her aged desk. Her wardrobe stood by the door leaving a large open area in the middle of her bedroom where she could walk around. No one was around, she lived alone, John and Michael lived with her aunt in the states.

She thought nothing of it as she took a break and stared up at the moon, it always looked so lonely in the sky, even though it was surrounded by thousands of stars she still couldn’t help but feel bad.

She cleared her throat, “why is it the loneliest souls are often found surrounded by people?”

“Because the more people that surround you, the more alone you seem to feel.” She didn’t expect a reply of any sort and whirled her head around, a boy floated at her window, completely and utterly drenched.

She exclaimed, “Peter! You’re going to catch a cold” he laughed and tried to tell her he doesn’t get sick but she had already sped off to her bathroom to grab a clean towel.

He climbed into her bedroom through the window and floated past her bed and onto her desk chair carefully, he didn’t want to get her sheets wet. She had come back in a flash, warm white towel ready to be used.

He smiled at her, “Wendy! You’ve returned” she nodded her head, “here’s the towel Peter, bend your head for me” he did as she asked and she got to work at drying his hair.

He looked around the room, spotting her journal almost instantly, “you working on something new?” She shook her head, “no, I was trying to finish the story before you came in.

He pouted, “but you were talking to me, if I had known you were writing I wouldn’t have answered.” Wendy laughed, “oh Peter, I wasn’t talking to you, I was talking to the moon!”

He looked up to face her, her hands around his neck as the towel stayed put. “What do you mean, talking to the moon?”

Wendy smiled and continued to dry his hair, “you see, when I was a child my mother would tell me the story of the man on the moon. He was a lonely old man who didn’t have a friend in the world.” Peter narrowed his eyes, “not a single friend? Not even his shadow?”

Wendy shook her head, “not even a shadow friend. The moon took pity on him because of this you see, so she summoned him to her.” Peter made a face “the moons not a girl!” Wendy rolled her eyes, “she is Pete, and what’s more, she made him her protector! He had a job to do and someone to speak to finally.”

Peter smiled, “kind of how I’m your protector, huh, Wen?” Wendy stopped drying his hair, she looked at him sternly, “I don’t need you to be my protector, Pete, I need you to be my friend.”

Peter blushed, “you mean that, Wen? You really mean that?” Wendy smiled at Peter who beamed, “wow! I promise I’ll be the best friend you could ask for Wendy, you’ll see!”

“You already are Peter.” Wendy whispered it so quiet she was sure he couldn’t hear her, but she was wrong. Peter stood up abruptly which startled Wendy so much she slipped on the puddle he created and almost fell back.

Peter had thought fast on his feet, he grabbed her hands and pulled her up gently. She locked eyes with him, “you okay, Wen?” Wendy blushed and looked down which made Peter smirk.

He looked around the room again, “say, what kind of instrument do you use for music?”

“Hm?”

“Oh, you know, so we can listen to music who do you have to call?” Wendy laughed, “we don’t need to call anyone, Pete, I have my speaker for that.”

He waited patiently as she scrolled through her phone for a song, he had asked her a bajillion questions about her phones use, and, Wendy couldn’t help but think how much Peter missed out on in Neverland.

She chose some piano music and hummed along to it as she dimmed the lights in her bedroom, Peter faked a yawn, “this is what you call music? It’s not even upbeat! How can we dance to this?”

Wendy pushed her hair behind her ears and got Peter back on his feet, he had whined and asked what she was doing but she hushed him immediately.

She grasped his hand, placing one on the small of her back and intertwining the other with her own. She showed him the steps and as the rain continued to pour they danced in her bedroom.

Her head fit perfectly in the crook of his neck since he stood almost a head taller. She closed her eyes and listened to the rain, for the first time in what felt like a really long time, she was happy.

See the full post

7 notes • Posted 2021-02-10 20:35:29 GMT

Chris Halliwell Whump List

Played by Drew Fuller.

(A/N: This is my first list ever so bare with me as I figure out what I’m doing. I do not own the GIF, credit to @random-fandom-whump. It’s not whump related but I added his first and last appearances on the show.) WARNING MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD.

S5.22: First appearance

S6.06: Shot, injured, sweating, groaning in pain

S6.10: Thrown, beaten, loses powers, feverish, injured, things from his past are shown, fought, sad, grieving, crying

S6.12: Reveals part of the truth, tries to help the sisters, is told to leave, sad, saves Wyatt, pushed to the ground

S6.14: Yelled at, loss of trust, asked to leave, seen in Phoebe’s vision

S6.15: Cut, healed, thrown to the ground, emotional, speaks about his relationship with his father, truth is revealed to both Phoebe and Paige, thrown across the room, fought, worried, crying, emotional

S6.16: Running out of time, pushed to the ground, anxious, stressed, slowly fading away, fading between limbo and reality, disappears, re-appears, Piper finds out who he really is

S6.17: Meets his granddad, coughing, confronted about not being alright, reveals something about his future, crying, emotional

S6.18: Scratched by a spider-demon, feverish, sweating, dizzy, turned, weak, in pain, on the ground, fought, beating someone up

S6.19: Asked about his relationship with his father, dismissive, holding someone off of a ledge, interrogating them, pushes them off

S6.20: Car chase, arrested, broken out

S6.21: Confession, opens up about difficulties

S6.23: Stabbed, dying, in his fathers arms, fades away, mourned

S7.07: Shown in Leo’s vision sequence, refers to himself as Leo’s “root pain”, asks Leo to let him go

S8.22: Last appearance

11 notes • Posted 2021-12-04 01:33:11 GMT

JOHN MURPHY WHUMP LIST

Played by Richard Harmon

POSSIBLE TRIGGER WARNINGS: Abuse, torture, death, mentions of repeated and *potentially* forced intercourse.

{A/N: I do not own the above GIF, credits to @inmyownlaine. This list is a long one as Murphy appears in all seven seasons of the show, so it took some time to complete. I believe I’ve gotten everything but do let me know if I missed some things. There are quotes scattered throughout of either something Murphy has said or something someone has said to him that I felt were important in his storyline.} WARNING MAJOR SPOILERS AHEAD.

S1.02: Fought, beaten up, bloody, held at knifepoint.

S1.03: Manhandled, shoved.

S1.04: Falsely accused, tripped up, on the ground, beaten up by a large number of people, gagged, tied up, hung by the neck, footing kicked out from beneath him, choking, being strangled, cut down, coughing, bloody, on the ground, shakily gets up, emotional, angry, holding someone at knifepoint, beaten up, held at the edge of a cliff, banished, bloody on the ground, shakily gets up.

S1.10: Found in front of the camp, covered in blood, sickly, cut up, recoils away from touch, shaking, mentions of torture, torn off fingernails shown, sick, throwing up blood, weak, given a virus, he spreads across the camp, weak, hostility towards him, lying on a hammock, gets up to let someone else use the hammock, shakily sits back down, tries to help someone, pushed away, suffocates someone.

S1.11: Fought

S1.12: Holds someone hostage, gets them to make a noose, tries to hang them like he was hung, punched, fought, runs away

S1.13: Re-captured by grounders, tied up, stabbed in the leg, screaming in pain.

S2.01: Limping, held at gunpoint, flinching, limping, laying down, groaning in pain, mentions not wanting to die alone, tying wound, revealing trauma, silently crying, punched, fought, straddled, beaten up.

2.02: Hands tied, limping, manhandled, chained to a wall, locked in a room, mentions torture, flinching, unchained to the wall — still handcuffed, manhandled, limping.

S2.03: Un-cuffed, pushed, used as bait.

S2.04: Running, limping, in pain, stops, pulling Bellamy up using a makeshift rope, holding onto the ‘rope’ on both ends to stop him from falling, pulling, struggling.

S2.05: Grabbed, flinched.

S2.08: Attempted to be used as bait, held at gunpoint, emotional, teary-eyed.

S2.10: Fought, punched, teary-eyed.

S2.12: Held at knifepoint, knocked unconscious, coughing, helped up.

S2.14: Explosion, thrown back, splattered with blood, another explosion, holding his ear.

2.16: Rowing a boat, bitten by a sea creature, groaning in pain, emotional, witnessed a traumatic event, groaning, hunched over, bleeding arm, clutching his arm, emotional, weak, walks away, dizzy, falls to the ground, angry, left behind, wakes up on the ground, bandaged and bleeding arm, finds sanctuary, watched a man kill himself.

S3.01: Panicked, tries opening the door to the sanctuary, the door won’t open, going insane trapped alone, filming himself, crying, angry, crying, tries to kill himself with a gun, can’t pull the trigger, crying, doors to the sanctuary open, sees Jaha, weak, tries to punch Jaha, collapses into his arms, unconscious, carried bridal style, wakes up, leaves, teary-eyed.

S3.05: Uses himself as bait, dry blood on him, covering himself in animal blood, held at knifepoint, forced onto his knees, forced to stand, still at knifepoint, taken.

S3.06: Coughing, tied up, interrogated, begging, bloody, injured, whipped, crying out.

S3.07: Tortured, tied up, bloody, (flashbacks from last episode showing him crying out and being whipped), weak, covered in injuries, choked, pulling at the rope binding his hands, removing the rope, running, trapped, fighting his captor, thrown to the ground, crying out, choking, coughing, knocked out, found unconscious, gagged, bound, waking up, held at gunpoint, flinching away from gunshots, witnessed someone shot, untied, witnessed death.

S3.09: Pushed down a couple of steps, in a fetal position, arms protecting his head, struggling to get up, holding his side, held at sword point, pushed against a pillar, watches someone slit someone else’s neck, witnessed death.

S3.10: Chained to a wall, dog collar, collar removed, pushed, watches torture, dog collared again, collar tugged, implied forced sexual activity (needing to sleep with the Heda so she doesn’t kill him).

S3.12: Lightly touched from behind, flinches, talks a little bit about what he’s been through whilst with the new Heda, betrayed, held at sword point, teary-eyed, arrested, manhandled, yelling.

S3.13: Flashbacks to his time on the Ark, watches someone get tortured, turns away, hears the person screaming, (flashback: slapped, instigated, forced trauma reveal, slapped, spits blood, grabbed, pushed against a wall, thrown across the room, punched, thrown over a table, pushed against a wall, choked, bent over his knees), persuades Indra to stop torturing Pike.

S3.14: Held at knifepoint, teary-eyed, “I can’t do this”.

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108 notes • Posted 2021-12-10 00:51:27 GMT

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akaashipogi · 4 years

Note

hiii! can you maybe write a head canon where the gym 3 squad finds out that their s/o is insecure about their body,,, and they help the s/o love theirselves or something? sorry if it’s cheesy akdkwks

Hii thank you for the req hehe,, noo I don't think it’s cheesy at all I think it's super cute, ,Anyway, I hope you like it, and I hope it lives up to what you wanted (Im really sorry if it doesn't ahfh) thank you again for your request I had a lot of fun making it hehe

---------------------

Bokuto Koutarou

So I feel like it would take Bokuto awhile before he realizes his s/o is insecure

It’s not bc he's dense or anything he kinda is but I guess its bc he's always busy with volleyball that's why it kinda takes him awhile to figure out whats been bothering you

But hohoh when he does he’ll do everything he can to make sure that you see yourself the way he sees you, as a beautiful person inside and out

He’ll probably message you every morning like “Good Morning Beautiful/Handsome”

Hes probs also gonna leave ur fave drink (like milk or soda) on ur desk with a little note attached to it

He does his best to make you feel better everyday

Kuroo Tetsuro

I know everyone kinda perceives him as a fboi, but Kuroo is really smart and observant of other people around him

So as compared to Bokuto, I think he would find out quite quickly, despite you trying not to make it too obvious, he knows you well and can see through you

I think he would be the type to sit down and actually ask you about it, and he just stays quiet, listening to every word you say

I feel like he would be the type to hug you every chance he gets and whisper how much he loves you and what he loves about you

Kuroo knows that learning to love yourself is a slow and hard process,

so he does his best to help you, practically holding your hand every step of the way

Akaashi Keiji

Everyone’s HQ crush honestly hfsh

I think Akaahi is kind of like Kuroo, he would notice that something was bothering you and would figure it out quite quickly

I also think that he would like for you guys to sit down and talk about it heart to heart

He would also be quite silent whilst you were pouring out your troubles to him, but would constantly run his hand through your hair or draw circles on your palm with his thumb, just to let you know he’s listening and that he’ll always be there for you

And every time you felt like opening up or things were becoming to much, he would absolutely drop everything just to be by your side and comfort you

Tsukishima Kei

Our moon boi damn

I also think Tsukki would find out about it quite quickly

But compared to Akaashi and Kuroo, I dont think he would initiate the “heart-to-heart’ talk

To him opening about these kinds of stuff is a very personal matter and he knows that it isn’t an easy task to do.

He just doesn’t want you feeling uncomfortable if he brings it up, so he waits for when you are actually ready to talk to him about it, and when you are he will always be there to listen

I kinda see Tsukishima as this type who isn’t that good with words, so he uses actions to let you know how beautiful he thinks you are

Like if you two were alone he would probably leave gentle kisses all over your face or on the back of your hand shfsh

He probably would look at you in such a way that just tells you that he loves you for everything that you are, and how he wants you to love yourself the way he does

Lev Haiba

Lev is a dumbass (I mean it in the most endearing way possible shfsh)

I mean like not dumb, just super dense lmfao

He didn’t really find out about your insecurities right away

He probably found out bc he lowkey joked about it and didn't really realize he offended you until Yaku spelled it out for him

He didn't mean o hurt your feelings ok fhffhhf he just never saw that part of you as something to be ashamed of

But he apologizes anyway and feels super bad

He would probably text you every morning “Good morning Beautiful” like bokuto lmfao

But his extra ass would probably shout “THERE’S MY AMAZING AND BEAUTIFUL S/O! HI Y/N” everytime he sees you in the school campus

Basically he dedicates each day to let you know how amazing you are!

Hinata Shouyou

I feel like out of the entire 3rd gym boys, he’s the one who would relate to you the most

There are times where he probably gets insecure about his height and becomes envious of tsuki or lev

But he doesn’t quite let that get to him, instead of dwelling on them he focuses on how he can make it into his strength

So when you opened up to him he totally understood you and how you were feeling

He does his best to give a small pep talk afterward

But he knows that things are easier said than done

So like Bokuto, he would also text you every morning and leave a milk box on your desk with a little note on it saying how beautiful you are

He would probably make you a bento at least once a week with a note stating what he loves and finds beautiful about you sgkjhskj

Requests are open! Feel free to send some! 👁👄👁

#haikyuu #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu imagines #3rd gym #gym 3 #bokuto #kuroo #akaashi #tsukishima #lev #hinata #bokuto x reader #kuroo x reader #tsukishima x reader #lev x reader #hinata x reader

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nightmaretyrantvantas · 4 years

Text

When tensions break too often- a dark side au story

So I got my ideas back for some angst and some tension in this au, and I just couldnt resist writing it. Plus its a good way to warm me back up into doing things for this au.

This is also a bit of a deeper dive into the dynamics of darkside! Virgil and the other dark sides and how they all bounce and thrive off each other, as well a some backstory and peeks at the full effects of Deceit leaving( jealousy is with the dark sides but is only mentioned, he currently doesnt make much of an appearance in this one in particular, he gets his own angst later)

This was fun to write, not gonna lie. Its been awhile an this is gonna be long so buckle up with me

I also got alot of inspiration to finally write this out(and revise parts of it) due in part to @aimasup ‘s recent comics and writings about their kid sides(which I love, like alot alot and I hope they dont mind me getting super inspired by it!)

ships: Past prinxiety, past anxciet, implied intruxiety, implied intrulogical, implied intruloxiety, implied one sided remus x wrath, implied past demus, implied current roceit

Im putting a trigger warning here for cussing, fighting(verbal and physical), descriptions of panic attacks and emotional breakdowns, violence, gross and inappropriate language, some body horror descriptions, as well as implied unsympathetic sides(all sides are morally grey but the perspective is biased towards the dark sides as its seen from Wrath’s view- keep that in mind)

Things are about to get angsty my friends but i promise it ends happy(for once in this au)

I hope you guys enjoy

~~~~~~~~~~

Wrath Sanders had a lot more patience then almost everyone gave him credit for. Most considered him the biggest hothead there was, going off at the first irritation. But, the truth was he was eerily patient...Sure he may simmer and seethe and hold onto things in unhealthy grudges, but he never lost his cool as often as some would want you to believe.

Wrath Sanders kept his cool during many things, even if that was the last thing he wanted to do.

He had sat back through many things, biting his tongue to hold back the venom and yelling and grinding his teeth together in anger and forced himself to sit through many many things that happened around him out of respect- out of a deep fucking respect- for Virgil’s Fear’s Anxiety’s authority. Instead, he watched shit go down over and over again and held himself back from reacting towards the problem, focusing his energy on the recovery.

But, the most recent event was his last fucking straw.

It had happened seemingly out of nowhere, Wrath had been slumped down on their shitty lumpy couch boredly watching some dumb movie. It was getting later in the night, around 10 maybe 11 and he had one of Remus’s crappy beers partially drank in his hand. He was just getting up to change the movie or turn it off all together when the whole house seemed to shift violently, the walls seeming to tremble. There was a moment of confusion before he heard it.

“ Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaauuuuuuuuuuuuughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

His whole body jolted to its feet unsteadily as the sound of Anxiety’s pain wreaked scream filled the house to an almost deafening volume as it distorted and deepened. His body moved before his mind, lurching over the couch and running for the source of the scream as another one wailed out even louder than the first, the sound muffling the breaking bottle and violently shaking the walls with their reverb. He heard other sounds too underneath, glass shattering heavy objects banging and wood splintering, wallpaper shredding. A third screech rang out, cutting itself in half with echoing high pitched sobs.

He hadnt been the first to make it to his room.

Wrath watched as he turned the corner in time to see Remus destroy Anxiety’s door with his morning star, a wild and desperately freaked out look to his glowing eyes as wood splintered and gave out under the weapon, some sending cuts into his cheeks. The creative side was then out of sight in a flash, forcing his way into the room yelling as to be heard over the screams.

Remembering the pain, the fear the absolute panic in Remus’s normally confident voice sent a deeper chill down his spine than the screams had.

“ Virgy??!! Fuck fuck fuck fUCK!! Virgy no no! Its me dammit!! Fuck FUCK FUCK!! No no NO! Virgy virgy virgy storm cloud creepy cryptid no no nnonononono look at me no no look at me cmon honey look at me not those at me. me me me me..” His voice continued, shaky and softening as the screams faded into heart wrenching sobs and high pitched hyperventilating gasps. Remus continued to speak, morning star thudding against carpet and a softer thud sounding.

“ Hey hey hey hey hey hey...hey hey hey I got you I got you I’m here im still here....i’m always here for ya honey...I got you now I got you see? Yeah yeah thats me....just focus on me....cmon cmon stormy cant pass out on me now...follow my breathing lets breathe together...in...out...in out...now....tell me five things you can see....cmon honey you got this just look up im here right here...”

The sight through the broken door haunted him, made his chest throb hard and bile burn his throat.

The bedroom before him was completely trashed. It was as if something feral and destructive had ripped it from its very foundation. Every piece of furniture, big or small, was broken and smashed apart, the anxious side’s bed and couch ripped into multiple pieces. Every shelf or flat surface had faced an even worse fate, thrown around and shattered into various pieces that had been strewn around the room along with glass fragments from anything unfortunate enough to have been made of glass. Papers and books were severed and torn apart viciously, and the wallpaper was slashed in huge wide cute, some of the slashes cutting deep into the wall underneath. And in the middle of the disaster was Remus and Anxiety. Long, protruding limb like dark shapes sprouted from the purple side’s back, twitching and trembling with adrenaline along with his heaving, hunched over shaking form. Remus was there in front of him, knelt down to the balled up figure and slowly but surely coaxing him up enough to pull him into his arms and rock him back and forth as he kept speaking to him. It took Wrath a few seconds of his vision adjusting to the room’s darkness to realize Remus had more cuts on him, and why.

Strings.

Millions of purple tinted, tautly pulled strings, like a tightly woven and intricate sickening spider web filled the room from top to bottom as if trying to shield the two in its depths. He could see parts of them hanging limp, likely from Remus forcing his way through to the other. He watched in a horrified shock as Anxiety’s body lurched and jerked with his piercing sobs, hand harshly digging into his scalp through his hood and shadowy claws threatening to rip said hood open. He could see many of the strings connected directly to various parts of his body and to the eight extra things on his back and it made him shudder. The room radiated a sort of fear and panic that was infectious, suffocating even. But he refused to leave the doorway and abandon the two there, in that too dense darkness.

He watched Remus manage to gather up the shorter side into his chest and rock him more, practically curling into a ball over him. He was still talking, his voice softening to the point he couldnt make it out anymore from the door. But he could see his expression. God his expression mightve been what pushed him past his bullshit accepting limit.

Remus’s face was grim, any traces of his grins and normal attitude gone. His eyes were glowing in a dark, dangerously violent fury but the way they stayed trained on Anxiety kept them, for the time being at least, soft and remorseful. There was so much pain there in that focused gaze, pain regret sorrow a disturbing amount of fear and understanding. His mouth moved with words not meant for Wrath to hear, soft gentle coos and reassurances too intimate to be heard by anyone else but the one trembling harshly in his strong arms. Brows furrowed and it made Wrath feel even colder to realize his hands, hands that were holding the other up and petting his hair through that black hood and rubbing between the spidery appendages, were trembling.

Remus was trembling.

After awhile the strings seem to fade away into nothing, those shadowy limbs following them scarily slow. Once that happened and the worst of the darkeness seemed to dissipate was when Wrath dared to take a few stiff steps into the room, debris crunching too loudly under his boots. He saw Remus stiffen and his eyes flicker up like a cornered, ready to attack animal before relaxing, glow never leaving.

“ W...wh..r...R-remus...”

“ Des...Dessy brat...h-hey spitfire do me a solid and go open my door ok? Dont worry itll lead to my bedroom...just...go open it for me...will you...?” Wrath’s voice failed him after that and he nodded, backing out of that suffocation and away into the brighter lit hall rushing from the room to push open the dark stained door further down. He turned around to go back, to try to help somehow...anyway he could, when he watched Remus instead picking his way out of the mess and into the hall, their leader cradled in his arms limply like a small sleeping child. Not a sound came from either of them as he stalked through the hall and into his room, a single nod dismissing Wrath before the door swung shut in front of him...

That was where he was drawing a line. Enough had been enough.

Wrath had sat back through many things, too many fucking things than he should have. He held back his doubts when Virgil and Roman had first started seeing each other when they were younger and dumber, had held himself and barely held Remus back from mauling the so called “good” creativity when things had gone awry and he had broken Virgil’s heart and left him in bitter, resentful pieces for them to pick up and help mend back together. He held back every time Thomas had, intentionally or unintentionally, slighted and undermined their jobs as a part of him, of their importance, of Virgil’s and Remus’s importance to him. He had sat back through the aftermath of ever fight with the “light” sides and with thomas, through every dismissal and banishment and arguement and accusation. He had helped and been there through countless sleepless nights and previous breakdowns and panic attacks between all four three of them, and he had been here, had been forced not to retaliate as per Virgil’s simple request.

“ Dont Des....dont go after them...Im forbidding it got it? Dont do it. it isnt going to be worth it...please...”

It had always been the please, soft and defeated that made him obey. Not the angry snaps and lashing out, not the cruel words and push and shove they all did for so long, but the plea in that word...the vulnerability it revealed.

He had sat through Deceit’s slow distancing from the rest of them...and his eventually leaving them for the light sides and the ensuing pain and breakdown that his leaving left behind.

It had splintered them, had struck both Virgil and Remus harder and more painfully than either side would verbally admit. Wrath had been forced to do nothing but helplessly watch it break them and break himself too, and try to clean up the aftermath best he could.

But this breakdown, seeing the side that had always stubbornly refused to buckle or back down reduced to a screaming sobbing wreck on the floor, seeing the other side he had always seen be nothing but strong and indifferent to everything thrown with a grin shaking in fear and softly pleading was too much.

He had stayed down, seething, resentment festering for years. too many years without an outlet.

He remembered the hand that had been held out to him all those years ago. Remembered coming along a little bit before Deceit ever did...and looking up from where he was angrily crying on the floor to see two figures before him. One was shorter, with two sets of brightly glowing purple and green eyes and a big black hoodie that was too big for him and messy hair that fell into his face. Behind him was someone much taller, with wild hair and a single streak of white in it, eyes feral and gleeful i a way that made him tense and made him mad through his tears. He was dressed extravagantly, like a prince or even a king grinning unnaturally wide. But his focus narrowed on the purple one, whose dark claw tipped hand stretched out in front of him in an offering. When Anger had put his head back in his knees to cry more he felt an arm drape over him. His head snapped up and he saw the princely one next to him with a softer expression, hand rubbing his back a little.

“ Hey....hey its ok Anger. Whatcha crying for? You did your job! Pretty damn well too! You were amazing the way you had Thomas screaming at that bully!” A clawed hand smacked him making him yelp and he looked in front of him to see Fear knelt in front of him with a look of understanding, a bitter smile on his face.

“ He’s right you know? You were only doing your job...you didnt realize how out of hand things would spiral and thats ok. How they reacted isnt your fault...”

They offered him a place to go, a place to thrive. Screw the others that refused to understand and stay with them. And Fear led them both deeper down the halls by the hand, making sure he didnt get lost

He was done standing down.

Someone needed to pay.

~ ~ ~

If he was honest, Wrath wasnt sure how long he sat outside the intrusive side’s shut door, sitting slumped against the opposing wall in a thick, deafening silence. It mustve been long enough for him to drift into an uneasy, restless sleep. His dreams filled up with memories of younger years, of pranks and scuffles and violent roughhousing the three of them got up to being on their own, of Remus making meals and running around frantic to keep both Anger and Fear from accidentally killing themselves or each other on something. Of Deceit hazily joining their trio, hesitant and quiet but able to snap back just as viciously and able to rough house back just as good as the rest of them after awhile. Of days filled with shrieks, squeals, bickering and shrilly laughter, of restless nights where they all broke into Remus’s room and dog piled on his bed to sleep. Of slowly growing up and watching Virgil come out of his quiet observance and transition from Fear to Anxiety and taking charge as a leader among them, of Remus stepping back and letting him with full confidence as his right hand and partner in crime in most cases. Of seeing Deceit come out of his terrified shell and blossom into a belovedly bitchy and...supposedly self assured side...of Virgil’s echoing screams that seem to reverberate through his very core...

He jolted awake at the sound of a door creaking, and sluggishly lifted his head to see a pair of familiar scuffled riding boots, laces fraying if you looked close enough. He lifted his gaze higher and soon locked onto tired green eyes that were dark and dull from exhaustion. Lifeless was a term he could describe those eyes with and that fact made him briefly queasy and cold. He looked tired, so very tired, and older. He was older than them both....but right now he looked much older than he was...There was a silence between them for a few moments that allowed Wrath to rouse himself up a little more.

“ Dessy....for all thats unholy...what’re you still doin out here dumbass? Did you stay there all night?”

‘Dessy’...‘ Des’ the nickname eased some of his shot nerves. Ever since they were kids they had joked that his name shouldve been “ Despair” instead of “ Daniel Williams” because of his very present pessimism and negative outlook. And soon it became so much more fitting that his nickname became “ Des” short for despair...or in Remus’s case “ Dessy” as he oh so enjoyed calling him. The annoying nickname was familiar though, and it helped him relax enough to speak. His voice was rough and awkwardly quiet in the small hallway, as if he’d been the one screaming.

“ I....wanted to make sure he’d be ok...” He trailed off, voice faltering with a clear shake. It sounded pathetic and weak to him.

But maybe, just this once pathetic and weak wasnt a bad thing. Because at the sound of his voice, and his dumb reason, Wrath saw some life flicker back into the older side’s eyes, some of their glow returning. Remus let out a tired, exasperated sigh and gave him a small sad smile, his expression softened into something sorrowful yet fond. That fondness, that softness sent warm tingling butterflies fluttering through his chest like it always did despite the grim circumstances. Remus let out a strained chuckle and shook his head, pulling his door shut with a quiet click.

“ He’s asleep now ya little Tasmanian devil...let him rest and we’ll check on him in a bit...now cmon, lets go make some breakfast and watch some movies or something....lets go up up.” With a grunt Des allowed himself to be heaved up by the armpits to his feet and didnt protest Remus wrapping an arm around him and guiding him down to the living room. He didnt want to see that pained exhaustion on his face...he needed to do something

and had a problem he was finally going to get rid of.

“ No Des you cant.”

There was that feeling as familiar to him as breathing bubbling in his chest, that hot smoldering feeling of anger or irritation igniting. It flushed out the cold he had been feeling in an unpleasant way but he ignored that part, pressing his palms flat on the table with a bit of force as he narrowed his orange eyes at the one across from him. He felt something like acid stinging his mouth and begging to be spilled free but he did as he usually did and grit his teeth to hold the worst of it at bay. Pushing it down. Holding back again.

“ Not again Remus. I refuse to just fucking sit back and do nothing again. They need to be taught a lesson! This is all their fault- all his fault--”

“ Even if it is so fucking what?! You blindly lashing out at them is only going to make things worse I can promise you that--”

“ Like hell it will!! They act like they can just walk all over us and treat us like fucking trash and cause things like last night and you think im lashing out blindly when--”

“ --When youre temper is as violent as a fucking feral mongoose--” “ Dont call me a fucking mongoose beetlejuice reject!!” “ Oh shut up and sit back down you twerp!!”

They went back and forth across the table, both their tempers and volumes raising as they fought. That bubbling feeling was twisting into a boiling, growing burning that began filling his chest and core. Why was Remus not agreeing with him for fucks sake--

His vision started tinging red.

“ Look brat you think I fucking like this?! You think im not pissed the fuck off?! Because I am! I’m beyond pissed off about this!! About the fact I know exact who and what caused Virgy’s breakdown and about the fact it happened at all!! I fucking get it!! But even I know you shouldnt just storm in there to take off trying to take off their fucking heads when youre too upset! Youre not thinking clearly enough for that kind of confrontation dammit im trying to protect you in this too!!” Remus’s words were loud, ruthless, and hard hitting. There were angry and forceful and made sense.

Plenty of sense.

And somehow that made him even angrier.

“ Oh? Ooooh! I get it, I fucking get it! Now that youve been sweetening up fucking logic youre suddenly the first to fucking defend them hurting our fucking best friend--”

“--oh for fucks sake bitch Logan has nothing to fucking do with this!! Im not fucking defending them either!! I swear to god im just trying to--” “ --to what huh?! Keep on his good side so you can get in his fucking pants?! Or so you can fucking push it aside and laugh about it later like one of them?!--” “ Goddammit you fucking stubborn brat you dont know what youre even talking about--” “ I dont know what im talking about?! I DONT KNOW WHAT IM TALKING ABOUT?!?!” His voice rose much louder, his own trembling distortion coming out and getting spat at the side who had helped fucking raise him like venom.

“ I dont know what im talking about?!! You mean like how I NEVER seem to know what the fuck im talking about?! Like how Virgil never knows what hes talking about or how you never seem to know what youre fucking talking about when your talking to them?! God now youre even starting to sound like those pretentious bastards!! Dont know what im talking about?! What part do I not know what im talking about Intrusive Thoughts?! huh??!!” His breath was coming out in ragged, squeaking pants as his eyes began to burn “Which fucking part do I not fucking know?! The part where ive had to sit back and bottle up my rage at being pushed aside and degraded and judged and dismissed or having to sit back for fucking years and watch you and virgil get hurt and hurt and ignored and dismissed and talked down and insulted and broken and having to swallow my protests of it?! Or of knowing last night fucking happened because Deceit decided to fully live up to his fucking name and abandoned us for those bastards and left us alone without a second thought and got away with it?! Or the fucking fact youre too busy trying to bone down logic to even fucking care--!!”

Smack!

It came so fast he hadnt had time to prepare for it before his head was snapped to the side and pain exploding in his face, on the cheek near the jaw in particular as he staggered to the ground a good foot and his eyes eerily slow dragged themselves from looking at the kitchen cabinets to Remus, who still had his fist outstretched near where it had collided with his face, his chest heaving almost like his own was, eyes wild and just as angry before a flash of realization went through them.

“ ....Des....fuck...i...you...” Nothing too coherent came babbling out Remus’s mouth, he was still way too hoped up on anger fueled adrenaline. His fist was starting to tremble and Wrath watched his pupils dilate a few times in his attempt to calm down.

And then there was something like an explosion as that burning feeling warped into a raging fire and Wrath let out a infuriated, inhuman shriek and lunged for Remus with a full intent to rip out his stupid fucking throat as his rage consumed him.

The two fighting sides went crashing into the living room loudly nearly knocking over the couch in their wake, both of them screaming and Wrath inhumanly screeching in an almost reptilian manner as he clawed and punched wherever he could reach. Remus wasnt just lying down and taking it either, yelling in loud angry spats of soon unraveling nonsense as he fought back mercilessly, throwing the other into walls, into furniture, throwing punches and kicks of his own. But nothing seemed to slow the orange side down and he struck back with slowly growing claws and fangs and something sharp growing out of his hair, angry tears burning his eyes and his voice too warbled and distorted to even be understood anymore, both their forms twitching and subtly shifting and glowing as they tried to rip each other to shreds, things fluid dripping and twisting lashing out from Remus’s back. Remus was stronger, he always had been, but Wrath had a seemingly endless stream of fury and adrenaline that kept him getting back up and charging in for more, the room being wrecked between them. Maybe things would have gone too far if it hadnt been brought to a hard, screeching halt.

By the time they could both blink they were ripped away from each other, both now uselessly struggling as they were entangled in roughly restraining strings that glowed a eye straining, furious purple color and seemed to tighten and wrap around them more the more they fought and struggled for freedom. Their indecipherable words and incoherent screams where just as ruthlessly cut short as strings wrapped warningly around their throats, not tight enough to actually choke or hurt them, but firm enough to be very present and felt, their voices being quite literally silenced the moment it touched looped once and touched the spot over their vocal cords. There was a horrifically tense silence as their mouths moved in spat insults and screams that never made a sound.

“......that....that is enough out of both of you.”

Virgil’s voice cut through the room like a cleaver, the tone dead, cold, and just as pissed off as they were. At first they couldnt see him, manic eyes darting around until Wrath saw the Duke’s eyes trained on top of the stairs near the hallway, pupils down to small pinpricks. When he glared over in that direction he fully understood and felt all that anger draining and quickly turning into a queasy, cold dread that made him want to cower.

That radiation of fury, or bone chilling fear and a kind of suffocating anxiety that made it hard to breathe and a panic that made them both feel like they were perpetually falling and simultaneously drowning swept over the living room like a flood, the corners and ceilings slowly developing intricate pulsing webs or strings that seem to absorb the rooms light as Virgil stepped, no, half crawled down the stairs and into view. Both sets of eyes were visibly, the whites dyed a void like inky black where his brightly burning purple and green irises cut into them coldly. Something sharp and gleaming poked from his scowl and revealed themselves as fangs as his snarl curled his lips. His hood was up hiding most of his pale skin but couldnt hide the flecks and scatterings of void like, inky and purple spots dusting parts of his slowly purple tinging skin. His hands, snapping out from his sleeves to grip the stair railing were fully blotched in that void, fingers curling into razor sharp claws that strings hung stickily too. The eight dark appendages, opaque and gangly half carried him down faster than usual, the ends digging into the carpet as if for stability. A shrill hiss whistled through Anxiety’s teeth and the panic inducing feeling of being stared at at being excruciatingly examined came from every corner, growing worse and worse as he stalked closer with silent movements.

“ What....the actual fuck are you two doing.” The words with sharp edged and cold, tone flat and tired. They both just stared helplessly, unable to move or speak and both beginning to mindlessly panic. Virgil blinked and a gust of air like an exhale swepted through the room and....left no traces of those fearful horrified feelings in its wake. Both of their feet thudded mutedly against the carpeted floor as the strings released them and retreated back into nothing, disappearing from all around them as if they had never been there to begin with...the room never dimmer than it had started in the morning light and the three of them stood there in silence. Any hints of inhumanity were gone from Anxiety’s form, leaving his two still glowing eyes losing their luster and leaving dull annoyance behind, no fangs, no extra limbs, no claws, no void dotting his skin. When he spoke he took a slow breath, as if unable to breathe just like them.

“....I...I mean it you two...what. the actual fuck did you two wake me up with.” Even his voice had returned to normal, if not for a bit shaky and hoarse from last nights screaming. Wrath saw his eyes were bloodshot, and his face was tinged with blotchy pink and was puffy from crying and something clenched in his chest, thudding hard. He looked at Remus, who was panting from lack of breath, eyes dull and exhausted and pain filled again, injuries from their fight blaring from the blood decorating his body and clothes.

He had done that....he’d lost control again...

“ Im dont want to repeat myself a third fucking time. What the fuck did you--”

“ I...This is my fault I started it...” Both of them looked at him, gazes drilling into him. But he let his head drop as shame took over, choking him a little. This was his family and they were already hurting and look what he’d done-

“Oh piss off Dessperato. It aint only your fault I fucked up too. Look virgy we were both tired and coming off that dumb worry adrenaline shit and we started arguing...and we got waaaaaay too heated and decided to beat the living shit out of each other...sorry we woke you you were suppose to sleep later.” Virgil let out a sigh and rubbed his temples, pulling off his hood and shaking out his messy bedhead.

“ Is that all that happened? Im not deaf and the doors arent sound blockers...” “ Then why are you asking.” Virgil and Remus as a bit of a stare off before finally, for the first time that morning all the life slowly returned to his eyes and he gave a toothy, blood streaked grin and started to laugh. The other two looked at him like he had fully lost it. Then Virgil’s lips twitched up and Des rolled his eyes and failed to stop the grin spreading across his face or the chuckles that he managed to choke out. Within a few minutes all three of them were laughing on the messy living room floor half sprawled over each other and Jealously bemusedly deciding they werent capable of making breakfast and making it for them all instead. Des watched half delerious from his exhaustion as Remus cackled and kicked his leg, just to laugh more when he kicked back.

“ I swear to god no more violence out of you two or I swear I’ll...” Remus let out a snort and gripped the other’s chin between his fingers sensually tugging their faces closer with a smug grin

“ You’ll what Hot Topic? Lock me in the closet again? Or send me reeling with nightmares and hallucinations~ Oh please virgy baby I dare you too~” His tone was light and suggestive, quirking his eyebrows up teasingly for added effect. Virgil snorted and and grinned back leaning close as well.

“ Oh dont start teeempting me with those sweet talkins about hallucinations dr. Hideous~ I might just take you up on that...” Then he flicked his nose and shove him away, both of them laughing. Des was about to try to give them the time to themselves when Remus yanked him between them waggling his finger disapprovingly, making him whack the other’s shoulder with a affectionate “ fuck RIGHT off” and for awhile, in that growing morning light, things felt ok.

It had taken alot of talking, and another arguement almost breaking out between himself and virgil to convince him to back down from confronting the light sides violently. Virgil brought a surprising amount of identical points to remus, while also reminding him that reacting to violently will only make them ignore and dismiss him further. Des was very reluctant, and stubborn, but ultimately he trusted Virgil’s and Remus’s judgement. He trusted Virgil’s reasoning and that he was looking out for him- protecting him. So when he asked him, softly, to refrain from trying to handle it on my own and let him deal with it Des had agreed, obeying his request.

And then a real tipping point pushed him back over the edge.

It was a few weeks later. He remembered distinctly because the mindscape was abuzz with excitement, even the dark sides were effected by Thomas’s unbridled joy. But Virgil had said he was getting a bad feeling...and headed off to the main part of the mindscape that morning. Things were quiet after, calm even. At some point him and Remus had started playing cards, though Remus was blatantly cheating and they were bickering.

Things were fine...things were calm...

Then Virgil crashing into the living room breathing harshly and in the midst of a bad panic attack.

They both jumped up and Remus caught the other in his arms, trying to calm him down and figure out what happened. It took a long time and for awhile they only got bits and pieces out

Thomas

A callback, a big important one he and Roman were thrilled for

Patton, something with both Patton and Deceit

Neither of them agreeing but both of them fighting Virgil

some kind of important friend event on the same day

they had argued, they had fought, there had been yelling by the climax of it

Him and Roman went at each others throat despite the fact he had been trying to help roman’s cause

Deceit fought him alot too, trying to cut him off at every chance in a form of fear response, out of defense

Him and patton argued and fought badly for the first time since Thomas’s last breakup

He thought logan would try to see his side and be a neutral party

Logan was getting tug of warred into agreeing to arguments to push him out

They kept trying to shut him down and dismiss him, they stopped listening fairly

Virgil had to pull out a form shift in front of thomas

He had to use his influences and fear to get them to stop talking over him and twisting his words

it only made things worse, and arguments harsher

They rejected him and his attempts to help more

He started having a panic attack mid argument

He thought logan and patton tried to help but they were getting drowned out by Roman and Dee

There was so much yelling, things that should never be said got thrown

They told Virgil he never does anything but make Thomas worse

Thomas finally nearly screamed for them all to stop and half asked half pleaded for Virgil to just leave until everyone calmed down

He lashed out and hit someone, he wasnt even sure who before he fled, not hearing them yell after him. It mightve been patton, or thomas, or maybe logan

And then his panic attack got worse and neither of them could get another understandable word from him.

In the end Remus eventually got him called down, after a good couple hours of trying, and it took everything in Wrath not to scream and destroy the room.

All Virgil did was try to help, and look what their....their bullshit left him. He was beyond seething at this point, he was fuming he was downright practically breathing fire and shaking from the effort to keep himself still. Remus gave him a cautious warning look, as if he was sizing up one of his many monsters in the imagination and debating if it would kill him or not and Virgil lifted his head to choke out for him to stand down, and to not do anything. Wrath had nodded silently and waited, watching Remus help him upstairs to his room to grab his headphones, and hopefully calm down more. Once they were out of sight he made a decision. He knew the consequences of it, knew theyd both be furious and Virgil would make hell for him for it. But none of that mattered to him

For the first time in many many years...he disobeyed Anxiety’s direct request.

It took a few days to find an opening, but once he saw one he took it, rising up in the big main living room, unknowingly in the middle of a video brainstorm.

Wrath always seemed to appear near the couch, between Roman and Thomas. Just seeing them made his blood boil more than it had been.

It was easy to say he scared the shit out of most of them by just appearing, his entire presence sucking the air from the room and making it hot and tense, a cracked dam waiting to break. Itd been months since he’d seen them face to face, and for a moment his senses got overwhelmed by everything.

But he let that fuel his anger further and he growled for them to fess up. Which one had said it. Roman had of course jumped to the defensive of his friends and that was all Wrath needed.

He lost it, pointing and yelling and accusing Roman. Blaming him for it. Roman didnt back down and fought back, and the fight only seemed to worsen. The others tried to interject, and maybe if Wrath’s vision hadnt been blood red from his fury he wouldve seen they were trying to diffuse the situation and calm things down, talk things out. But he ignored that, whipping around and lashing out at them too

“ Wrath you need to step back and take a deep breath! Youre getting irrational!”

“ Wrath kiddo please we dont have to yell and scream about this Logan’s right lets all take a deep breath ok?”

“ Like hell! Im not going to just let him force his way in here and yell and scream and pretend its ok and we can talk!”

“ Roman please!” “ro stop getting angry back is just making all of it worse the others are right we need to be calm or we’ll never get through to him.”

That voice. Silken and soaked with caution. He whirled around on Deceit and snarled pinning him to the wall without thinking.

“ This is all your fucking fault! Youre the reason they keeping hurting and virgil has breakdowns that put him out of commission for days!! Youre part of the reason Remus locks himself away beating himself up. they trusted you!! We all trusted you and you decided to fuck us over and throw us out like trash!! Was it worth it?!?! Was being here worth breaking the people you grew up with you and loved you?! Well?!” There was yelling around them, and he thought briefly he heard Remus’s and Virgil’s voices behind him as well. But now all that anger, that pushed down bitterness and resentment finally had a target and he couldnt focus on anything else. He didnt even heard Deceits struggling answer as he tried to claw him off, his different eyes wide and his mouth moving in words that werent registering.

“ -youre right ok?! Fuck youre not right at all--fuck fuck I get it youre angry and I fucked up with this, this isnt my fault and I havent been trying to figure out ways to fix it! I totally havent been beating myself up for what happened a few days ago with virgil and I dont regret it ok--” THe words blended together in his head, there were hands on his shoulders ripping him away the the freaked out snake and shoving him into the couch. He snarled but froze when he realized He was staring at the very formal business end of Remus’s morning star, inched from his nose and Remus standing over him with a dark look over his face...dark and upset The red faded from his vision and he blinked rapidly, eyes burning again and jaw aching from how hard he’d been clenching it or from yelling he honestly couldnt even tell anymore. From behind Remus stood both Logan and Virgil, side by side speaking in rapid low voices he couldnt decipher. Behind them he caught of glimpse of Roman and Patton both kneeling on the floor, fretting over a still freaked out Deceit as Jealously offered to help him up. Wrath was struggling to breathe, his body twitching and shaky from the quickly fading adrenaline. Soon he was left feeling cold and sick of himself, staring at Remus with just as wide and wild eyes.

“ Easy....easy spitfire....youre...just breathe for me ok?” He couldnt even nod, he couldnt move. He vageuely noticed Virgil and Logan both looking at him before the morning star was gone and Logan was in front of him, hands palm up in a non-threatening manner.

“ Wrath can you hear me? Good...just listen to my voice...I need you to name me five things you can see.” He blinked rapidly and barely heard Remus’s and Virgil’s murmurs of reassurance. Or maybe Virgil’s was more quiet talking, as he was standing at Patton’ side like the normally bubbly side’s shadow.

“u...uuh....y..youre tie...r-remus’s outfit....the stairs...the others...and the Roman’s s-sword...” Logan gave a nod, slowly kneeling in front of him with a calm, leveled expression that helped him focus more.

“ Good, now four things you can touch. Take your time Wrath.” He flexed his fingers, more of a twitch really as his breathing began to even out slowly. “ Um...My jacket...the couch...my jeans...uh...t..the carpet?” He nodded again through his faltered stammering as the deepness faded.

“ Three things you can hear?” He blinked again and listened for a moment.

“ .....your voice...Remus’s voice...the others...” “ Two things you can smell, remember take your time.” “ Bacon...from breakfast...and someones cologne..” A small smile came to his face as he adjusted his glasses in slow noticeable motions.

“ Just just 1 thing you can taste.” He managed to smack his lips once and his face screwed up at the taste lingering in his mouth.

“ ....acidic bile...” Both their brows furrowed a little but when Logan looked over his shoulder Remus shrugged at the silent question.

“Probably needs to puke Dr. Maywhoo.” Logan sighed at the nickname and turned back to him, holding up his hands a little.

“ Now, Wrath Id life for you to unclench your jaw, roll and relax your shoulders, loosen your posture if you can, uncurl your fingers and exhale please.” He blinked and slowly did as instructed, not realizing until then that he was wound up like a jack in the box. His jaw ached as he unclenched it and his shoulders slumped heavily as he relaxed, fingers sore from apparently being curled into firsts for so long, small red lines in his palms from his nails. He felt calmer, drained and upset, but calm.

“ Logan, Remus.” He looked past them to see virgil standing up tall, if not awkwardly, besides Roman and watching them with a hard to read look.

“ I...think sitting down and calmly talking...is now long overdue.”

~~~~~

Hours later Wrath Des found himself on the mindscapes main couch tiredly nestled besides a dozed off Jealousy Jacob and a cheerfully talking Patton. They had spent hours haphazardly strewn around the very room, just...talking and discussing and airing years worth of grievences. It wasnt easy, and things were no where near fixed or completely repaired. But, there were many small positive steps taken in that direction...and things were lighter and better as they stood at a better understanding of each other. Things werent perfect, and in the back of his mind he could list everything that could fuck up and send them back spiraling. Yet he didnt want to ruin what...whatever it was happening as dinner was cooked. Logan, Remus, and Virgil all sat together on the other side of the couch chatting among themselves and with Patton as they tried to decide on a movie and played candyland. In the kitchen he could hear Roman and Deceit cooking and giggling with each other, trying to outdo each other with some dumb food based pick up lines. But they sounded happy, so many it wasnt that dumb...Des watched them play candyland, staying relatively quiet aside from answering questions and jabs sent his way. It was comfortable and relaxed, and Des couldnt help but yawn. Without noticing , he ended up resting his head on Patton’s clearly unoccupied and underutilized shoulder as his eyes drooped shut. He felt Patton jump a little before slowly relaxing, and he didnt even need to open his eyes to flip Remus off as he let out an overly exaggerated coo at the motion letting himself relax. Patton smelled good he decided. Like fabric softener and baked goods and some kind of spice...Des also decided that the blurry sight of the trio next to them, with Remus’s legs draped across Logan and Virgil’s laps and one hand playing with Virgils messy hair as he sat on Logan’s right and Virgil contently and fully relaxed into Logan’s left side, head resting in the crook of his neck and his hand laced with the logical side’s unused hand as they played was also good. The sound of Jacobs soft snores was soothing and the joyful flirty voices in the kitchen blended into it well when combined with Pattons soft humming. If this was how things would be more often....he’d learn to add a little more patience to his supply of the stuff....

And maybe for once he didnt have to be negative, with no more tension for now to be broken.

The end.

Ok holy shit its finally finished!! This was over 7k goddamn words of emotion and holy shit was it a rollercoaster to write

THis is what happened when I wake up before 5 in the morning after not being able to sleep much...I apparently bust out 15 whole pages worth of words

Now....to go do my chores real quick and go pass the fuck out for an hour or two of sleep

I hope you guys liked it!!!

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