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trashcanpurpledragon · 2 months

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Miss you more than my life

PART 2

Lab at Night 10:31 pm

Donnie felt uneasy, like something was bothering him. Of course there was that thing with y/n and him, he knew deep inside he had to apologize to them, but he also knew he was far too prideful to say something…

When the both of you got married, he told them that his work consumed most of his time, most of his life…but even at this warning they did not want to step back…

“You think i don’t know that? I have been working by your side for a bunch of years know so yeah…i know how your life can be 95% work…but… if you let me, i want to be that 5% left and who knows? maybe i will gain more terrain over time!”

He smiled at the thought of you both that day when the decision was made, your smile wide and eyes filled with happy tears, memories of happier times.

"We are so childish. When the shift is over, I'm gonna compensate for everything. I’ll fix all this mess." He thought.

He start thinking in every posible route for that talk, but in every single path the result was the same. They were gonna talk, probably gonna start fighting, maybe start crying again…oh dear Einstein no tears, he’s weak when they start crying… but then he was gonna apologize because now he knows his pride is not worthy of losing them. Waking up to a empty bed, seeing them everyday in a cold silence, colder than the space outsite the earth, not talking…not kissing…

Who would say that him, the great Donatello Hamato, the one that dislikes physical touch most of the time. Who is the one protecting the whole base, THE MOST INTELLIGENT LIVING BEING!...would miss the touch of his love…their arms… resting his head on their legs and sleeping even when he knew he had more important things to do than staying in his partner's lap.

But…

Nothing is more important than them.

The softshell looked at the clock on the panel on his wall.

1 am

He then stare at his work between his hands, it was incomplete but if this works they way he wanted, this stupid machine was gonna give them a heads up everytime a Krang started getting closer. Also, it would scan the persons approaching the resistance…a few weeks ago Michel had come with concerning news.

Apparently he found two krang-zombies but…they were fearly awake, of course they were visibly covered with krang parasites and when they got closer, the krang-zombies started attacking the whole team.

There were no fatalities but…also no information and that was the thing that annoy the softshell the most.

Leonardo ordered to be more careful to any krang-zombie, but that made him worry.

If the krangs were playing with the bodys that they were infecting…then anything can happen, of course, everybody knows that those creatures are smart enough to play with biological material…but they had never showed any interest in doing things like this.

“Maybe…they want us to help the sick and…” Said Michel but he could not end that sentence.

“And attack the hideouts without them knowing where we are…they are getting impatient” ended Leonardo with an angry face.

The krangs were starting to attack not only physically…but mentally too, attacking the hope of the ones that lost their friends and families by using puppets of them.

“If only they could see that his work was gonna save a lot of lifes that could be in risk because of those stupid 2.0 krang-zombies” said donnie with annoyance and then…he remembered what he was thinking to begin with…

His stupid brain that hiperfocuses in the logical things but left behind the rest, Michel had told him again and again that not everything was about numbers and logic, but if the world could be just like THAT, if not everyone in this dumb dumb world could focus more in the importance of logics, the point of doing the math first and seeing that his way is not as bad as everyone tries to make it look like…it was not his intention to hurt them…it’s just that, his work is way more important than…

…No…

Wait

Nothing is more important than them…the persons he loves…

Is just…he cannot help everyone if he is not working, if he was working instead of resting maybe he would have foresing that new move in the krang plans and be wary of them…if the Krang notice the reaction of their teams at his new toy they will start doing more of them and worse, they would be better that the one his little brother saw back then.

The resistance don’t need him to be sleeping, they need him working! Damn it! why nobody can see it?, He is the only one smart enough to look ahead of the Krangs movements, if he was not working…What was his purpose?...He NEEDED to be useful for the people…for his family…for his love.

Donnie let out a big sigh and turned his gaze to the ceiling above him, once again he is making excuses for his behavior…AGAIN. He punched the table where he is working making everything on it jump or fall.

“Damn bro, what has that table done to you? Jeez you nearly broke whatever that thing is” Oh that voice, the voice of his nightmares most of the time.

“What do you want Nardo, it’s not a good time” answered Donnie, annoyed without even turning the chair to look at his twin entering his lab.

Donnie stared at the machine that he was working on, without thinking, with no need of paying any attention to it. He had at least half of the structure of his machine done, this thing may be the key for security of the whole base, and let them rest with ease at least for a few weeks…or a waste of time and resources.

“Hey, Don” Leonardo brought him back again to reality.

“WHAT?” He snapped at him but only then, they looked at each other’s eyes.

Leonardo looked tired, this whole war did a number on every living being, but to his brother, to him it destroyed him on different levels. He looked older than his real age, his chasm is now way bigger than Raph ever was and his eyes don’t shine as bright as before. Donatello would never admit it but… he missed that shine in his twin eyes. Is not that his twin stoped being annoying with his puns or behavior…it just that sometimes when he thinks nobody is watching…he can see his twin losing his light for a bit before masking again.

“I was not gonna put my nose in whatever is happening between you and your spouse but this–”

“Good, then don’t put your nose in my marital problems” cut his twin without looking, without stoping working.

“Jar jar, common Dee, you know that i would never–” once again, Donnie interrupted him.

“And then here you are, bothering…again”

His brother made a growl and proceeded to cross his arms over his chest. While Donnie continued building his thing, never stopping being useful even when his twin was bothering him.

“YOUR LOVE was crying a few hours ago” says Leo, and only with those few words he had Donnie standing from his chair and looking directly at him.

“Are they ok?! why were they crying? are they hurt? is there any problem? is–” Leonardo let out a little laugh, not with malice, the whole scene was just to “cute” for him.

In front of him instead of the grumpy twin of his that probably was sulfuring about hundred problems at the same time, moving his hand faster than his brain could think, that just a few minutes ago was yelling at him for being annoying and all that stuff, now that very same turtle is looking at him with worry all over his face, any piece of anger that was there now was replaced, and that look made him smile. There were few moments in life when his brother showed this type of worry for someone outside the family.

“He is so in love for them” though Leonardo

The red eared slider took donnie by his shoulders, so he would shut up and be still for enough time for him to explain everything. “They are ok!, Calm down dude”

Donnie visibly relaxed after these words, and just stared at his twin knowing that those words were not the last ones.

“As i was saying, i’m not trying to meddle in your marriage or anything but you need to understand that after you both got married, they also became part of our family, that means if YOU make them cry i have to act as a good brother-in-law and come here to give you a talk”

“That’s not what a brother-in-law does…also that’s not your duty as a leader?” donnie looked at his brother raising an eyebrown

“...Why you both keep saying that?” Leo said irritated but continued “yes BUT i’m doing this because you and the other dumb dumb are part of the family, ‘cause they are YOUR other half…and as twins your are my other half, so that makes this whole situation a problem that at least should be talked about between both of us.”

At these statement Donnie just look at his brother, his twin and gave him a small smile and resigned to lisening whatever was gonna say.

“Aaaaaaaand also i just saved your sorry ass of having a session with doctor feelings”

“I hate doctor feelings” was the only answer donnie gave with a shiver making leo laugh a bit more

“Look, i know that whatever happened was your fault” at this statement donnie made a “Hey!” that Leo cut before it could grow more “come on, you know is AT LEAST half true.”

Donnie didn’t say a thing, giving Leo a point.

“I don’t care for details, really, if you don’t want to tell me is fine but i think you both really need to talk, because what they told me is… kinda of… um… not sure if sad is the correct word but i guess is the closest thing i can come with.” said Leo while scratching his head.

“Did… did they say anything to you?” Donnie's voice was so small, almost afraid to know the answer but concerned enough to search for it “are they mad?”

“I will not tell you what exactly they said but… i can tell you that they are sad in a way that they are starting to have thoughts that will be a problem later if you both don’t fix this soon”

Donnie didn’t say anything so leo continued “Look, i know you love them, god knows that you are happy by their side. We, as your family, know your way of love, but sometimes you can be kind of… rude. You try to do all things on your own, even when we have told you before that you don’t need to be working 24/7… yes… we are at war and is… all of this is just bullshit… and that probably without you we would be far worse than we are now, but you also need to rest and enjoy your partner while you can… since this war can take everything we love…”

The brothers look at each other, pain all over their faces, different kinds of pain; one of fear to run the same luck as his twin, the other with the pain of someone that lives with regret.

“I know you miss L/L too…” Donnie tried saying in an attempt to soothe his twin’s old pain.

“We are not talking about them or me for the matter” leo said with a hard voice and gave a big sigh “i’m just saying that you should try and talk”

“I…I know that”

Both brothers stayed silent for a bunch of minutes before Leonardo broke it.

“Have you slept at all?” questioned

“Scoff, as if i had the time. I’m working in something for the 2.0 Krang-zombies” answered Donnie looking at the table were his invention was laying…half build, half operational.

“And what that thing is? It looks like that killer robot from the movie of weird small dolls with numbers on their backs” start saying Leo getting closer and looking at the piece “yeah! that one that made Raph and Mikey had nightmare for like a whole week or so”

Donnie looked as his twin perplexed, he did not know what surprised him more: the fact of Leo remembering a movie that they watched when they were like 6 or the fact of Leo remembering ONE SINGLE CHARACTER of a 2009 movie that they watched only once.

“When i finish it” Donnie started to say, ignoring the question “it will help us scan the persons entering our safe zone and keeping and eye out for the krangs getting close”

“Scan the persons?” asked Leo looking at his brother

“I build it for the 2.0 Krang-zombies as i just told you, do you ever listen to me?”

“Yeah but you usually made things in the computer, like programs and all that stuff. It has been a while since you actually build something outsite the cars or something for the base” said Leo “The krang-pupets also put you alert?”

“Krang…puppets?” he could not be serius

“yeah, the troups haven’t seen one since Mikey, but we are all wary…The fact that they still could talk and Mikey could not heal them…”

“Yeah…”

But before Donnie could say anything Leo spoke

“Let’s go”

The softshell look at him confused “Go were?”

“To the communication room, it’s like 4 and half or so”

“What? No, it’s around 2 am, I looked a few minutes ago and–” it was in fact 4:43 am, he had been working so much that lost the notion of time “It’s 4:41…but what’s the use of going? They are probably working and waiting for their shift to end”

“You my brother, are ZERO romantic” Leo smiled at the annoyed face of his twin “Their shift ends at 6am right? Then you both could crack a few lines and have a smooth beginning when you see each other face to face”

They look at each other…and then “Tired sigh…Fine”

Leo smiled at his victory and both of them started walking, talking about stupid things Leo wanted him to say over the com that OF COURSE he would never say, because

a) It was impractical

b) It was stupid

c) He was not gonna give Leonardo another victory

and most importantly!

d) He was gonna say it in private with Y/N and only with them alone

“Common Dee! what’s the worst that could happen? It’s not a matter of life and death, they are literally at the door” questioned a very happy Leonardo

“Says the turtle that hates doing guarding shifts” answered a very annoyed Donatello.

“I hate being still, anyways they have the safest jobs today. It’s fine”

And even at this words, Donatello was still feeling uneasy. They arrived at the central com and looked at the time in the clock on the wall.

4:58 am

COMMENTS!

Editor’s note: I was promised two drawings in exchange for correcting any mistranslation or errors on this fanfic. Sorry if I missed any. Enjoy your sad turtles.

Autor’s note: shut it and work >:) Everyone say hi to this new character called Editor (She’s my older sister)

Editor: Hi 👁️

Anyways... Thank you for been so patient waiting for this fanfic to continue, yes there is at least two more parts of this history 💜 I'M REALLY sorry if there is something that does not make sense, english is not our first language 😥

Also L/L is the lover of Leonardo~

TAGS!!

The original autor! @fishsticksloser (Thankyou for letting me work in this history :DD)

And here is the original work

Part 1

Stay tune~

#rottmnt x reader #rise donnie x reader #rottmnt future leo #rottmnt future au #rottmnt future donnie #rise of the tmnt #rottmnt donnie x reader #rottmnt future donie x reader #rottmnt fanfiction

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romanestuffsposts · 7 months

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Hii!!

I have so so much homework I'm so stressed. Like I have more than 20 assignments for math and I'm crying. Could you maybe do one where the reader is so stressed and starts slipping and crying because they still have to finish the work?

Lovveeee youu

Hi there love! 💜

Ohh my sweet love i'm so sorry you're overwhelmed so early in the year. No matter the time of the year, school shouldn't be so overwhelming, it's a place where we're supposed to learn and to spend happy time with friends.

I really hope you'll find a way to studie and do your homework without stressing too much. Remember to spend time for yourself, don't focus too much on your homework, it'll just destroy you more.

If you need help to organize your work you can send me a message! i'll be really happy to help you so you don't have too much in once.

I hope you'll feel a little bit better after reading this my love.

I love you too ❤️

Enjoy <33

****

Warnings : cries, little reader is overwhelmed by school, too much homework, mention of school and assignements, comfrot of daddies, cuddles, hugs, pet names, kisses, reassurance

Pairings : Daddies!Stucky ; Daddy!Bucky x Papa!Steve x Little!Reader

Summary : A long day, a heavy head from information and big assignements can only bring to one thing...

****

You frustratedly groan as you let your pen falling from your hand. It's been a little bit over two hours now that you're writing and writing and writing across asignements for school and you can feel how big and completed your brain is right now.

Your Papa is in the kitchen, preparing dinner while your Daddy is showering upstairs.

Your Papa doesn't want you to move your butt away from the chair until you finish your homework and the fact that you can't do it is upseting you so much.

Seeing the words written on the assignement, the pen rolling on the table and all the paper spreading across the dining table is stuffing your brain even more.

You can't help the little tears slipping away from your beautiful eyes as you keep gazing the things who's draining you more through the minutes.

You don't want to disappoint your Papa by stopping now. He's always so happy when you finish something for school and is always behind you to push you forward so you can get better but today is just one day too many.

You hear your Daddy walking back downstairs, in a short and shirtless. He has a white towel around his neck and his beautiful metal arm is showing as his skin is still humid from the shower. When his eyes gaze into yours, you can't help all the tears who run out of your eyes.

You drop your eyes on your laps, hoping he was too far away from you to noticed your crying eyes but his fast footsteps that's following your movement is telling you otherwise.

He pulls the seat beside you and sit down in a way to face you. He rests a reassuring hand on top of yours as you silently cry, his thumb gently rubs your hand.

You don't wait for him to say something, you get up from your seat and climb into his laps. He helps you climbing on him and you immediately curl against him, his arms are tightly wrap around your exhausted body as he held you close to him.

He gently swings you from side to side "breath, baby. Just breath, it'll be okay" he whispers "just get everything out, i've got you" he kisses the top of your head

Steve comes into the dining room, thinking he'll find you sitting on your seat, writing one of your assignement for math like you have been doing for hours now. But to his surprise, it's not this sight that he find once he steps in the room.

"baby ?" he says confused, he doesn't lose a time and sits on the seat you were a few seconds before. His hand starts to caress your back in a comfort way as he hears your soft cries who breaks his heart.

"can you tell us what is wrong, sweetie ?" he softly asks.

You sniff and take deep breath to prepare yourself. When you're ready, you turn your head to the side so your cheek is resting against your Daddy's chest and so your Papa can hear you correctly.

"is too much" you sob

"what is too much, beautiful ?" your Daddy asks, his fingers sliding down your hair to calm you down

" 'm assments" you say struggling more and more with your words.

"You had too much work for today ?" your Papa asks. You nod your head before hiding your face back in your Daddy's chest. "sweetie look at me please" his sweet voice ask.

You sniff a few times before finding the strenght to look at your Papa in the eyes "it's okay baby" he softly smiles "look what you did today! It's already so much. You did really great with your homework and it's normal to be overwhelmed with all of this work"

"you don't have to force yourself to work when you have too much. It'll only exhausted you more and it'll be useless. Just tell us when you can't do it anymore baby. Okay ?"

You sniff and nod your head "you don' mad a' me ?" you shyly ask.

"absolutely not, sweetie. I will never be mad at you because you can't do something. The matter is that you tried and that's what happened tonight. I'm proud of you for trying" he kisses your nose "but don't stress too much because of that. You're not in trouble, you're far from that actually"

You giggle and sniff at the same time making him and your Daddy smiles "why don't we go help Papa finishing dinner ? After we can eat the biggest ice cream we ever had while watching movies so we can clear that little head of yours ?" your Daddy proposes as he gently pokes your head with his finger.

You giggle and rest your back against his chest. He wraps his arms around your body and hold you tight once again, knowing that you moved because you needed to be held differently.

"let's put away all of that, mh ?" your Papa grimaces as he points at your assignements "we'll help you doing it later. But we'll do it together, you won't be alone"

You nod and thank him as he moves away your homework. Once the table is clean, your Daddy stands up with you in his arms and walks toward the kitchen, following by your Papa.

He sats you on the counter and winks at you, making you smile. The first true smile since you start your homework...

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spicesweet · 4 months

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any tips for someone who wants to stop counting cals and ⭐vng in 2024? (so happy you're back 💙)

first of all, ty, I'm happy to be back too 🤍

in my case, quitting counting calories worked because my entire mindset around what food really is has changed.

I'm reading SO much more on nutrition than I used to, and there are so many studies showing that our focus on calorie quantity is extremely misinformed and is actually a strategy by the food industry to keep responsibility over obesity and food-related health issues on the consumer rather than on the industry.

that made me understand that it is the quality, not the quantity of food that really matters, and that made counting calories useless: I don't need to really do math if I understand the food in front of me and how nutritious it is or isn't and how my body will go through it.

I think understanding nutrition and our body's relationship with food in a biological and chemical level is way more useful and important than doing this sick little math routine. this is still a fairly recent development for me, but it is already showing overwhelmingly positive results in my daily life.

now, it's been a long time since I quit trying to starve myself into skinniness, and for multiple reasons. first one being: it doesn't work.

well, I mean, sure, if I were to actually starve myself, it would make me lose some kilos, sure. but I don't think most people understand really how impossible it is to maintain that. only very few people have the circumstances that allow them to keep starving for a long time in order to maintain it, and the effects of that are so devastating for the body that it stops making sense to me. even in my most self-destructive phase, I wasn't trying to kill myself, I wanted to live, live the life I dreamed of. I didn't want to be a weak and stinky and hollowed shade of a person, I wanted to be pretty and small. that's still my thing. I don't want my teeth and hair to fall off, I don't want my digestive system to turn on itself, I don't want bad breath and eyesight, I just want to feel good about my body, no matter what.

and all those considerations would be if starving for that long of a period was possible for me, which it never was. I never lived alone, I only started to have food autonomy (deciding what I ate + cooking what I ate) around 7 years ago, and I've always had responsibilities and, yk, a life that required energy. plus, I've never been in a situation where food wasn't available for me, and I was never able to trick my brain into believing it.

and what happens when you have food available and you want to stay away from it is that your brain will turn on you. your brain doesn't give two fucks that you want to starve for cosmetic reasons: its job is to keep you alive no matter what. if your brain knows you can eat but are choosing not to, the second it becomes too hungry to handle your basic needs, it will do whatever it takes for you to eat, and if it has to turn on you, it will. if it has to give you cravings, it will, if it has to start a stream of self-hating thoughts to get you to give up, it will. if it has to break you, it will.

(does that sound familiar for anyone who has a frequent or chronic binge eating issue?)

understanding that + understanding more about the food industry, health, nutrition and biology made me realize that this would be a vicious cycle of pain and struggle followed by frustration and even more pain, and it would result in nothing.

the urges haven't gone away, of course. I still think of starving myself as nice. I still love hunger pains. I find it exciting and sweet. I still see it as a "tool" that makes me calm down when I'm having a very hard time. it still gives me a sense of control and discipline.

but so does keeping my diet, exercising every single day, learning about nutrition and health. that also makes me feel like I'm in charge, like I'm the person I want to be already, even if my size is not the one I want. and with this type of discipline and struggle, I actually see results. not the "I didn't eat for 3 days so I'm dehydrated and that makes it look like I've lost weight and got smaller but if I put a single peanut in my mouth I'll be worse than before" results (again, familiar, anyone?), but the kind of day-to-day progress, the quiet and surprising type.

some motivation I've gathered for myself: when I was one month into my diet+exercise regime, I started to hear from my husband how much my body had changed. within two months, I went to a pool party where my friend said I was the one with the best body out of all of us, that I was in great shape. in three months, my older clothes started to drop from my frame. this had NEVER happened before, not in the decade and so that I tried to waste my body away. not a single fucking time.

I'm not saying that shifting into this lifestyle is easy (it literally took me my whole life to start it lol) but it's what makes sense to me now. it's what makes me resilient and proud and it's what makes me happy even if I'm still obsessive and still technically clinically ill. but at least I'm over that issue. yk?

I hope this helps you, sorry I wrote so much, I literally can't shut the fuck up about this subject HAHAHA 🤍✨

#love letters #flowerlog

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adultswim2021 · 4 months

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Delocated #7: “Sick of It!” | March 30, 2009 - 12:15AM | S01E07

The season finale that luckily didn’t turn out to be a series finale. In this episode, Jon is at the park to get custody of David, which is one of Jon’s favorite things to do. David is dropped off by Susan’s bodyguard/boyfriend. David is also wearing a motorcycle helmet. David’s insistence on wearing the helmet around is due to his bodyguard’s influence; he owns a motorcycle and apparently made an off-handed joke about leading your day-to-day life in a helmet that David took a little too much to heart. Jon orders the production to halt so he can father his child privately, and not on camera. When they refuse, Jon flips out. He eventually grabs one of the cameras and takes off with it.

After shaking the show and his family, Jon films himself from the confines of a bush. Eventually he lures a fella named Mark played by Michael Shannon, an actor whose name I knew, but I can’t for the life of me ever recall seeing him in a motion picture. I’ve literally had multiple conversations with people who mentioned his name in some context and I just nodded as if I knew who they were talking about. So that’s who that guy is! He’s great in this! I think I like this guy!

So Mark, played by Michael Shannon from Delocated S01E07, decides to be friends with Jon after Jon beckons him to be in the bush with him. Eventually they hatch a scheme to exchange lives. Mark and Jon exchange clothes (NOTE: the DVD contains the entire take of them changing clothes, but it's sped-up, so you can see exactly how laborious it was to film), and then Mark exits the bush when Jon’s loved ones all come out looking for him. This is the moment the Mirminskis strike, shooting and killing Mark (dressed as Jon).

The episode ends with Jon doing a Tom Sawyer to his own funeral, walking in with the video camera during Susan’s eulogy for him. He shoves the camera in people’s faces and taunts them. He retrieves his ski mask (his face is pixelated out in the actual show) and very nobily oversees a funeral for his once-friend.

This is probably my favorite episode of the season. It relies on the simple premise that Jon is enamored with the idea of being bros with people. The concept of friendship is extremely important to him, because he probably finds himself in need of allies on a constant basis due to his terrible behavior. It’s like a numbers game for him. So he and Mark bond very quickly. Their scenes together are wonderful.

The bit at the end where Jon eulogizes his friend and decides to throw a proper funeral for him using the handful of things he knew about him to give it personal flare (pall bearers on roller blades and the presence of his candy apple red dodge durango) is so fun. The part where Jon rehashes all of his Mark facts to the people attending his own funeral is wonderful.

At the end of the episode, Jon drives away in Mark’s bitchin’ ride, and his bodyguard bolts for him, making it seem like Jon has now successfully fled the program. Will he be back for a second season?? Will it be expanded from 11 minutes to 22?? My friend! Time will tell my friend.

MAIL BAG

It is mail bag my friend. I love you:

Why did you put a picture of Doc Hammer and Jackson Publick above your writeup of some dumb british show I never heard about?

(Joe Biden voice) C'mon man...

Using my napkin math I saw you took 5 tasty tuesdays last month. It was the holidays so sure it's okay to take one more tasty tuesday than usual. However, you have already taken 2 tasty tuesdays in january and we are all 6 days in. And I fear you may take one tonight.

Sometimes I think I need brain medicine (probably, actually) because I lack focus, and part of that includes me losing patience with the concept of burdening myself with a nightly mandate to post. But then I realize that by skipping days and simply not caring makes me one of the only people living on Earth who truly knows freedom. Stay safe, and happy January 6th, my friend.

#adult swim #adultswim2021 #delocated

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seekingdecay · 1 year

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Caitlin Speaks: Jealousy

Tws for: kinda child abandonment(?), discussions intrusive thoughts and thoughts of murder

This is reaaaaaly headcanony and has like zero canon uphold byt fuck you battle frontier content

Story under readmore

I was 15 years old when I genuinely thought about killing someone. About killing my best friend.

Before I was tossed carelessly into the hands of Sinnoh's battle frontier, I had been abandoned by my mother. Two different mothers, two different occasions. The first time, when my birth mother decided I was too dangerous to even be around her, that I was too much of an embarrassment to even be called her daughter, my father had naively contacted a trusted psychic in Kanto. Sabrina. One night, when I was 6, he handed me my stuffed ninetales and wrapped me tight in a blanket my Baba had knit for me and said I would be going to a woman who would show me warmth, someone like me with my powers.

I, just as naive as my dear father, was so excited. I got the experience of traveling on a boat at night, seeing all the stars in a sky not polluted by Castelia City's constant neon signs and billboards. I got to go to a big manor surrounded by woodlands, being carried by a psychic woman who would teach me how to make the beast inside my brain obedient. How to control the overgrown fields of orchids in my head.

When I was 9, I was handed into the arms of my uncle, a man who works at the Sinnoh Battle Frontier. Owns the damn place. So that lasted a noticeably short amount of time. I choose to shove those memories deep into the recesses of my mind, especially the cries of those who bored Sabrina and made the crime of losing in her gym, whip in her hand.

Palmer's first course of action was to hand me off to our Castle Valet, a new hire in need of someone to do math for him. I was young, 9 years of age, so of course I was excited to do it. I just wanted any scrap of praise at this point, for someone to feel an emotion for me that wasn't bitter.

The main problem is unlike with Sabrina, I was not to be around any pokemon without supervision. If I was alone, I was taught to run away and find one of the other brains. Luckily for me, when I was 14, at my most angry and grudge filled, Palmer had announced a young boy my age coming to join as the new Factory Head (what he failed to announce was why the previous one left, I had harassed that witch of a woman so much she quit mid battle).

Apparently, he failed to note this to that boy, too. As he had seemingly wandered into my corridor without Darach while touring the Castle (I chalked it up to typical teenage boy behavior at the time). He had tapped me on the shoulder, which startled me, and I smacked him clean over the head with a plastic crossbow. Knocking him out.

Later, after that kerfuffle, Darach had approached me about that boy. His name is Thorton, he told me. He does not have any friends, but he's a wonderfully sweet young boy. He'd be a good influence on you. Go be friends with him.

Because of that, for the first few weeks I simply despised him. I detested him. But after some time… We grew closer, Dahlia would tease me about our friendship. Saying we were joint at the hip. Never without eachother off hours, if either of us could help it.

I knew why Darach had made me befriend him, though. It still made me bitter.

As much as I loved him, Thorton made me bitter.

One day, Palmer had sent the two of us out on a walk on the mainland. In Eterna forest, just the two of us. But I felt as though the reason was to get him to walk me like a dog. Take the bad kid for a walk! Go, Thorton, go!

Thorton was typical, researching for his Factory. As I followed and listened to his ramblings, eventually tuning out and losing focus, I couldn't help but feel a violent bile rise in my throat. We had parked near a stream and as I stared down at our reflections, the water flowing over a large and loose stone, I couldn't help but get bitter.

Thorton was, truly, everything I wanted.

I didn't want you, I wanted to be you.

You were perfect in my eyes. You had the respect of our fellow frontier brains, you had a mother who would occasionally try and check in, you could exist without the worry of getting too frustrated and needing to be locked away like a bomb threat. You had pokemon, you could battle, you could think without clouded judgement, you could hear your own thoughts and be creative without the pain of someone else's emotions coursing through your veins like a drug.

I wanted to be you.

But most importantly, just then, I wanted to pick up that rock from the mud and smash you over the head. Maybe two, or three times. You were bigger than me, stronger than me at the time. I would need to hit you hard with that heavy stone so I wouldn't get pinned and taken away by the other brains and abandoned again. I wanted to kill you and then run away deep into the forest, never to be found. Likely only to die myself. Karma. Sabrina taught me about that well.

I guess…

Some people are just born with malice in their head.

#factory head thorton #elite four caitlin #other mentioned characters #fanfic #pkmn talk #rotoms writings

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soil-just-needs-water-to-be · 10 months

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Chapter 29

This chapter is so bad I swear but I wanted to get it done for people and I hope you like it..

Comments are most appreiciated

George's POV

A few hours after we had done what we'd done we were both sat with each other quietly just studying our own stuff with each other's company, it was peaceful and it really helped me having him there just the extra person to give you comfort, studying in my own got really boring and it was really starting to drive me insane but while he was there with me it helped a lot , every now and then I'd catch him mumbling little things to himself like "nah man your an idiot", or simple sums trying to work out his maths problems a few times I did notice him get a little frustrated and upset so I helped him through a couple of solutions on how to fix them because I know maths can be challenging and he's told me before that it was something he didn't like, but in turn he'd helped me through my English literature paper which I am eternally grateful for. Even though I was enjoying the peace and we were both getting work done there was still a little problem itching at the back of my brain that I needed to ask about. I was just scared to ask incase it wasn't my place too, but I think he could tell because in the last fifteen minutes all I'd done was stare into space or directly at him and he'd caught me a few times

"Hey my love , can I ask you something"

"If it's about maths darlin, it should be me asking you?" , I know for a fact he knows what I'm going to ask him so he's just trying to make light of the situation before it gets a little deeper

"No my love , I need to ask you about the other night" , I visibly saw him tense at the question and he dropped his pen in the desk and scrubbed his face over with his hands

"What about it gorgeous?"

"Can you tell me what happened"

"Nothing happened really , it was just a bad day", At this he picked up his pen and tried to concentrate on his work again but I could tell he was a little nervous, stressed out maybe and I don't want to be the person that causes that for him but I also don't want him to feel like he can't tell me how he's feeling. I don't want to push it I know he'll tell me in his own time but I'm worried for him. For now I just let him concentrate on his work it'll keep him focused for now but I know I'm going to worry about him. Getting back to my own work will be a challenge. I try I really do but it's hard and I can't seem to focus on it and I know he's watching me "George"

"Yeh?"

"I'm sorry, I know you worry about me but it's just if I tell you, you'll just worry more and I can't do that to you"

"My love , I understand it's difficult for you but I need you to hear me out here, we're talking and we like each other right , you would be worried if I was in the same position as you right ...", I pause for a second to let him answer which he does with a small nod. "You'd want me to tell you what was going on yeh ?" , he nods again slightly looking more sheepish and shy. "We'll then you understand that if I'm asking how things were it's because I need to know and of course I'm going to worry but it's important I know so I can help"

"I know you wanna help , it's just complicated Georgie, and I would tell you but I don't really understand why it happened , other than I was really deep in my own head"

"We'll we can start there , what were you thinking about , what was going on your head"

"There's just always so much going on my head all the time , I can't shut it up you know, it's so hard to feel comfortable when you can hear everything that's going on and theres just so much pressure in my head and it feels like I'm going to explode if I don't shut it up, and if I do explode I just get angry at everyone and I hate that , drugs or alcohol are the only way I know that makes it quiet for a little while , I can lose myself and feel like I'm not actually in my own body for a while" , Matty had shoved his books out of the way and was resting his face in his hands while his elbows dug into the desk that he was working at.

"What did you take?, it's okay if you don't want to say", I think I probably know the answer since it was only a few days ago when it happened last but if I can be more knowledgeable about how to help him when he's on a come down then it'll make things a little easier for him.

He looks a little uncomfortable, fidgeting in his seat "Coke, but I drank a bit too and I think my body just kind of shut down, because one minute I was okay and the next I felt like I was dying and that's never happened before , like you know the panic just over took me and I couldn't breath, I just thought we'll this is it , for a second I didn't mind which is the scary part"

"You...you don't ....you don't really wanna die do you"

"Not right now I don't no, but in the moment I didn't mind for just a second, I'm not going anywhere though darling I promise , I just find it hard sometimes"

"How does it feel when your on a come down , from what I know about drugs there's always a come down" I'd moved over to my bed at this point my work completely forgotten about, the bed being more comfortable.

"I either get really clingy to people cuz I'm in pain or I'm just angry and I hate that. It usually happens a couple hours after , Ross is really good at dealing with me he's been doing it a long time loads more times than he should really, I mean I'm always clingy so I'd understand that he can deal with that but when I'm angry he deals with it so we'll I couldn't ask for anyone better"

I know Ross is his best friend but I still couldn't help but resent him a little, it's maybe even jealousy that he gets to be with Matty as much as he wants he can just go see him anytime he likes, sees him at his best and can help him through his worse. Ross is amazing from what I've seen over the weekend he's a wonderful guy and I'm glad that Matty had someone but I'm just envy him a little. I must be thinking about it harder than I thought I was because Matty pulls me out of my thoughts "Georgie ??"

"Mmm?"

"What're you thinking about darling? , you were very deep in thought just then"

"I just wish I could be there , wish I could be the one you could rely on when your feeling like that"

"Trust me if you knew how it was really , you wouldn't want to even be near me, it just makes everyone around me upset and it's so bleak and dark for ages" I can see his eyes have begun to look glassy and I really don't want him to cry right now because it'll break my heart.

"My love trust me , I wanna help no matter how dark it gets . I'm here okay, We can talk about something else if you like" , I notice him shrug but only minutely if I wasn't paying close attention I wouldn't have noticed at all.

"No it's okay , I'm seeing my doctor on Monday so I'm going to have to figure out how to talk about it"

"We can do something else for a while though if you need , watch a movie or something take your mind off of it , maybe watch some more game of thrones I know we liked that " I watch him look up from where he'd been boaring a whole into the floor and faintly smiles at me "would you like that love ?" , Matty nodes calmly and wanders off to his bed and brings me with him as he settles

I let him get comfortable as he pulls his duvet around him even though it's only 3pm and cuddles up with his cozy cardigan again then I set up the show for us so he doesn't have too and can just stay settled up in his own little world "you look so cosy my love ", he just smile at me sweetly and nods to me as the show begins , the theme tune breaking through my room brings me a lot of joys , I know I've only just watched a few episodes with him but this feels like our thing and it makes me happy as well as the fact I can see it makes him happy aswell , he's so cute just softly bobbing his head along to it the episode plays as we both lay there basking in the events of the show , stealing glances every so often like we usually do. As the next episode begins I can see his eyes start to drift closed as he grip on the cardigan looks to be getting tighter. It makes me smile to no end watching him lose himself to sleep and not fighting it.

"George", I wasn't expecting him to speak as I thought he was half asleep and looked to far gone to even acknowledge that I was still there

"Yea my love?", I was also not expecting the next words to fall out of his mouth.

"I'm scared" , hearing that leave his lips as he drifts of to sleep makes me pause the show and sit up a little straighter. So I can concentrate on him and him only.

"Of what my love?"

" my brain", this comes out as more of a sigh mumbled as if he's not even aware he's speaking, sleep talking maybe but I still have to check if he really knows that he's talking

" why?"

Matty rolls over to lay on his back still gripping his cardigan his hair slowly falling over his face as he shuffles around to get comfortable. He must have been sleep talking as I don't get a reply, my first instinct was to text Ross to see if he's knows if Matty talks in his sleep. So I take out my phone and find him on instagram

George : You bro , does Matty talk in his sleep by any chance

I busy myself doing more work and cleaning my room while I wait for Ross' message, I pick up the pile of dirty clothes and bring it down to the kitchen leaving it in front of the washer as I'm not finished taking things down. Next to come down is the dirty coffee cups and a few plates that I haven't brung down. I bring the hoover upstairs with me when I go back up, I put my side of the call onto mute so as to not wake Matty then begin to hoover up my room it's such a mess up here. I never usually let it get this bad but I've been so preoccupied lately , after hoovering up my floor I take the nozzle off and hoover up the dust , ash and nicotine from my windowsill (rank I know I'm sorry ), when I've finished hoovering I take my laptop back downstairs with me to begin the washing and dishes .after loading the washing machine it takes me like ten minutes to wash my dishes leaving them on the drying rack to drip dry, my phone vibrates in my pocket

Ross : I don't know a time the lad doesn't talk, why ? Whats up ?

George : it's alright don't worry, I just couldn't tell if what he was saying meant something or not but it's okay don't worry

I slide my phone back into my pocket and turn the washing machine on, I check the dryer to see if there's clothes in there , there is so I get on with folding them into piles. Matty stirs after a little while, while I'm still folding and he sits up bolt right rubbing his eyes "huh?" , I move over swiftly to my laptop and unmute myself

"Hey hey hey , what is it?"

"G..G....G...George?"

"I'm here Matty , I'm here , what's wrong"

He's still rubbing at his eyes quite roughly , and coughing a little bit. "I think I was having a nightmare but....I don't...I don't remember...falling asleep"

"You fell asleep like 30 minutes ago my love, what we're you dreaming about?"

"It was like I was alive but like also dead and I was just walking around and like when I tried to speak to someone I either couldn't speak or if I could they weren't hearing me or they were just choosing to ignore me , not that scary I understand but it just freaked me out"

"Maybe it's because you struggle to talk to people and you brains just trying to show you how scary it can get"

"Maybe , what are you doing ?" , I know he's just trying to change the subject so he doesn't have to talk for now I'll let him out of talking. I bring my laptop over to the middle island in the kitchen and set it up so he can see that I'm cleaning up and I get back to folding the clothes.

"I just finished cleaning my room, but now I'm just cleaning up for mum"

"Awww mummies boy are we ?"

"Are you not?", the smile he gives back in response , goofy and lopsided like he's a puppy trying to understand humans. "What's that face for ?"

"You really are, aren't you?"

"Am what?"

"Mr Perfect"

#george daniel #matty healy #adam hann #ross macdonald #the 1975 fanfic #the 1975

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hoodedfigure-no99 · 4 months

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So I’m in Vegas and I’ve just had the most whiplashed day I’ve ever had. I bought a ticket to see Zak Bagans’ Haunted Museum, which was actually pretty cool, glad I went. Some of it’s pretty hokey but whatever it’s a Las Vegas entertainment thing. Loved the gift shop ngl. Anyway, I got to go into the basement and let me tell you I saw a shadow in the mirror down there and the spirit box went nuts. Other areas were tamer, I love Peggy, though she was kinda quiet. I felt super somber in the room involving Kevorkian. I grew up watching all sorts of news reports involving him, and honestly i don’t understand how his van could be haunted or anything if at all. Yes, many died in that van. Many died because they wanted to do so. He let them dictate when their final moment was. He didn’t connive them into suicide. They longed for rest that would eventually take them after days months years of excruciating/debilitating pain. Anyway off of that tangent. The worst of it was the room with Ed Gein’s cauldron and as soon as I entered it I felt BAD. The vibes were off in the most unsettling way. Another “I am uncomfortable” moment not involving claustrophobia and/or clowns was the Dybbuk box. To start off, the room before it, I was starting to lose my balance, but when I entered the room, I…lost track of myself in that room. I found it super hard to focus and I felt off. I got the shivers as soon as I entered, and continued to feel cold and shivers until way past when I got back to my hotel.

Would I go again? Absolutely. I want to do the flashlight tour because I want to talk to Peggy, or really get down to brass tacks with the Dybbuk box.

Also: did I look Peggy in the eyes? Yes. Did I have severe random stomach pain for a half hour later that evening? Sure did.

Now let me bring y’all around to the whiplash. I wasn’t feeling too hungry, and seeing this as a time to try Gordon Ramsay food, I decided to walk to the fish and chips place next door. Got my food, super quick, very tasty when i eventually ate it.

The whiplash occurred as I walked by 2 guys next to a lit up Chippendales sign. i was tired, i was a little peckish, so I walked, until I heard one of them say “stop right now” in *that* voice. The sub part of my brain like TOOK OVER, help. I stopped dead in my tracks and looked over and he absolutely lost it. IMAGINE USING DOM VOICE ON A RANDOM STRANGER AND HAVING IT WORK. That boy got his claws right into me. Anyway I wasn’t thinking (I really wanted to try the fish and chips), and he’s like “here have some beads, also come over here and take some pics with us” basically and again i was like ok but the math wasn’t mathing in my head until he took his jacket off and I was met by a broad toned *naked* chest. I stared at him like I’d just encountered an alien (Christ I love being acespec, just makes these encounters actually hilarious), and then his FRIEND joins in and I don’t think I’ve ever been this red before in MY LIFE, Anyway I got some really funny pics and I’m going to show you all.

Also I touched a man’s ass (as requested), and when the camera went off he flexed his cheeks and IVE NEVER BEEN MORE CONFUSED IN MY LIFE ARE ASSES SUPPOSED TO BE THIS MUSCULAR HELP 😂😂😂 all i could say at the end of it was “you guys are so warm” 😂😂😂

#zak bagans #Zak Bagans haunted museum #tw suicide #tw haunting #tw serial killers #Chippendales #las Vegas #what a day #tw suggestive #suggestive #naughty frickin gentlemen

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periru3 · 6 months

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I feel the strong need to whine about my mental health.

A week and a half ago I had 100% on every assignment in my math class. I was obsessed with my math class. Everything in it was either easy to me or interesting enough to me that I would hyper-fixate on it for hours figuring it out. I lost sleep because I was having so much fun doing math. I did so much extra reading and mathing and writing. I was going fully off the rails obsessing about number theory.

And then a week and a half ago my seasonal affective disorder kicked in and now I can’t think or focus on this class or any of my assignments. I haven’t completed any of the last weeks assignments on time and I didn’t even finish two of them. Why can’t my brain work. I am so sad. I was going to do so well in this class. My teacher must be so confused as to why I suddenly stopped trying at something I clearly was loving for the whole semester up until now. I logically know that I can still get a 98% in this class if I get my act together for the next week or so. But still. The assignment I’m trying to do right now isn’t even hard. I understand the math. But instead of getting super excited and writing way too much about it and drawing up fun visuals to share with my class I’m just staring at my screen thinking “great. I understand it. Why do I need to think about it or write about it at all. I’m good. What if I curled up and never moved again.”

I guess it’s just really disheartening to see something like this happen so fast. I know my depression makes it hard to focus and think and enjoy things I used to enjoy. I understand how this works. I’ve lived with it my whole life and I know every October I suddenly lose the will to live. It’s just I was doing so well in this one thing. Maybe to an unhealthy degree. I should have been sleeping. But. I was enjoying enjoying something. And then it just went away overnight. And I’m so sad about it. I don’t know what to say to my teacher.

Why can’t I just get to keep things I enjoy ever? Why does it always have to be so hard?

#depression

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jameui · 3 years

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SPECIAL PRESENT 1

Requested

part 1 | part 2 | part 3

PAIRING: Sugar Daddy!Jung Yunoh x College Student!M!Reader (featuring: Bestfriend!Lee Jeno)

GENRE: Fluff, Smut

WARNINGS: Unprotected intercourse, huge age gap, a lot of IMPORTANT flashbacks (i think), daddy kink, sex toys, overstimulation

SUMMARY: You were a striving student in Resonance High and had perfect records. Besides your devotion to your education, you were also gifted with a talent. All these stuffs making your sugar daddy, Jaehyun, proud of you, so he decided to give you a night you won't forget.

(P.S. so i was fucking dumb to actually think that when you said performance, you meant by performing on a stage, when you actually meant, how male reader actually did good in school. I was too late to notice. sorry. if this didn't reach your expectations.

The school's foundation day is fast approaching and each student at Resonance High are all excited preparing for that certain day. During the school's foundation day, events such as competition in sports and performances like singing and dancing or spoken poetry. All sorts of event takes place in that particular, not only a day, but a week, that every students can take part in.

The school's foundation day does not only happen after a day. It's a week of celebration for the foundation and, of course, free from homeworks and projects that students have to worry about. All their focus must be on having fun on those days and be active in participation. Some students never liked the thought about celebrating a foundation day, but you on the other hand, thought otherwise as it's your first time celebrating it with a friend, since you never really get to do it with any due to you practically being locked up in your house for almost all years of your life.

Now, you were away from your family and you got to finally do anything you wanted. For example, having a sugar daddy who gave you all the help you needed. Sure, at first, you were just doing it out of mere fun, but you never quite expected to actually grow feelings for the older male. You didn't know when it started, but the first time you ever felt the fluttering of butterflies in your stomach was when he became worried and concerned when you got sick after a very excessive practice, the day prior. You wanted to tell him so, so bad, but you didn't know how to.

You were scared that maybe you were crossing the line or coming off too strong or maybe he'd walk away if you broke the agreement. It first started with just you only being up for it because of the agreement. Though, you never really went as far as you giving him a good blow or having a steamy bath with him. Either way, he was still someone you could trust and the only person you could rant about all your problems. The thought of losing all these scared you the most.

Unlike some other people, Jaehyun was smart and was a successful businessman, owning one of the richest companies in the industry. Jaehyun, when he's not busy, he'd help you out with your math homeworks or would just do it for you, since he found it fun and easy. Sometimes, you think he's Einstein, reincarnated.

Jaehyun, besides his brains, is also fun to be with. He knows about your passion and talent for singing and dancing and your once dream to be an artist, so he would sometimes play loud music in the living room through the speakers and you two would be singing along, him making up lyrics when he have no idea what the song artist's saying in their song. He'd sometimes call them drunk, because they sounded like they were slurring their words, which you would always laugh to. Also, he'd let you teach him a few dance steps you saw on tiktok and you'd record it together, only for the fun of both of you.

You were seated by your section's booth and couldn't help, but crack a smile from the thought. That was until one of your classmates decided to cut the moment. "What's with the smile?" Jeno, one of your friends, questioned with a smirk whilst carrying a case of bottled apple juice, placing it beside the stand of the booth.

"Here to tease me, again?" You scoffed at him, as he shrugged his shoulders. You rolled your eyes at him and stood up from your seat before heading to the school's gate where the rest of the important necessitated items are waiting. You skipped along the way and stopped by the pick up truck that was parked at the parking lot. "Anything I can help with?" You asked with a smile.

"Here's the last of 'em." He gave you two cases of the bottled drinks, one stacked above the other making you grunt.

"This is heavy." You muttered under your breathe, your thin hands barely holding onto the handles. "Th-thanks." You told them your feet wobbling from the heavy weight of the trays.

Jeno who came walking back outside saw you struggling, making him chuckle deciding to help you. "Need help with that?"

"Yes, please." You said before passing the trays to Jeno carefully, so it doesn't topple over. "Thanks." You smiled at him, cracking your knuckles and shaking it to reduce the pain you felt on your hands.

"Welcome." He said, then walking back to the booth, with you beside him. "Ah, M/n. By the way, are you attending the practice this afternoon?"

"Yeah. Of course. Why do you ask?" You chuckled, kicking on a pebble that came your way.

"Oh, I just thought you'd be busy sucking your daddy's—"

"JENO!" You yelled at him with an evident blush on your face cutting him off to avoid anyone hearing what Jeno had to say. It's always been like this. Since the day you told him about having a sugar daddy, he'd always tease you no matter where you are or what you're doing. He'd always use your excuses against you and now, you're regretting ever telling him.

"Okay, okay. Damn." He laughed at your reaction, you staring daggers at him.

Just as you were about to spat back at him, you heard a group of girls' voices calling out to you. "M/n! M/n! M/n!" They were successful in gaining your attention, while they smiled running up towards you. "M/n! You didn't tell us you have a handsome brother..." One of them said, while batting their lashes.

You knitted your brows in confusion. "I have?" You asked the girls, who looked like they knew better and nodded their heads. First of all, you don't have a brother, but you have three sister, two are older and one is younger. Second, you don't even know who these girls were and yet, they mysteriously knew your name and who you were. "Wait, who are you talking—"

"M/n-ah." You heard that sweet raspy voice of the man you loved, your head snapping towards him who stood by the side of your booth. You guessed he was on his break, since he was still in his suit and it was already past twelve in the afternoon.

"Jaehyun!" You giggled as you ran to him, all the while opening his arms for you to throw yourself in. You gladly complied and wrapped your arms around him, the lot older male doing the same as he hung his long arms on your waist. You snuggled into his chest before you looked up at him to see him already looking down at you with a smile that displayed his deeply carved dimples. "What are you doing here? Aren't you busy?" He made you giggle when he patted your head and planted a kiss on your forehead.

"I wanted to see my baby." Jaehyun replied, then pouting. "I've been so tired lately."

You furrowed your brows in concern and hugged him tighter. "Can't you take a three days off?"

"I want to, but I got to keep the company running if I don't want it to fail." He answered you, making you nod your head.

Once the girls saw these, they quickly felt embarrassed and walked off without making a sound, Jeno laughing at them.

"Then, why don't I treat you to something sweet? How's that?" You wanted to do something for the older and this was the only thing you could ever think of.

The pout was still glued to his face when he looked back down at you. "Angel, we agreed that I would do the treating."

"Well, you're the one who needs my help, right now, so I want to do something for you, other than..." You cleared your throat and mumbled, "...the other things I do for you."

Jaehyun chuckled, as he finally gave in to your offer while he ruffled your hair. "Alright."

You pulled away from him once he had loosened his grip from around your waist. You took him by the wrist and told Jeno that you'd be somewhere else, leaving Jeno with the rest of the responsibilities, promising him to make up to it.

You were leading Jaehyun to the canteen, before he gently pulled on your hand. You turned your head towards him, your eyes moving down to where he held you. You chuckled and smiled. "What's wrong?"

"Can... I hold your hand, M/n?" The question took you aback, only since he never really asks those type of questions. Ones he only asks are some that goes by the line 'can you suck my dick?' or of some sort.

"Sure." You managed to smile from the obvious shock that got Jaehyun a little red. "You didn't even have to ask." You added to which he nodded to shyly. It would be times like this when you would forget that he is a good thirty years old because of his cute personality.

You two finally made it to the canteen, the taller male receiving a lot of stares from all those present inside. Jaehyun was yet to spot the attention he was gaining, but you were already feeling iffy even though you knew that those heart eyes were for Jaehyun. But, you couldn't help the feeling that those eyes didn't like you being around Jaehyun. "J-Jaehyun..." You squeaked out silently, tugging on the sleeve of his suit, taking his attention whilst smiling down at you. His smile faltered upon noticing how you looked subtly shaken and cowered in fear. "I.. I think we should leave."

"Baby, what's wrong? You look so tense." Jaehyun asked you out of pure concern, cupping your cheeks as he gently tilted your head upwards, so you could face him, but you removed his hands from your cheeks that got him almost shocked since you'd never really let yourself move away from his grasp, instead you would usually just lean into his touch and let yourself succumb to the warmth he was radiating, but this. This was different and he knew exactly that something was bothering you.

"Can we go, please?" You sounded like you were begging for you two to quickly move outside, leaving Jaehyun with no choice, but to nod his head and let you drag him out of the place. Alas, you were outside, but he never received even a word from you nor a hum, a sigh, nothing. Just complete silence.

He grew more worried thinking that he might have done something that he shouldn't have or said something that made you feel so uncomfortable. He was getting anxious as you continued to keep your mouth closed and never said a word. "Baby, you know you can trust me, right?" Jaehyun caressed your thumb in a comforting manner, his eyes showing how much he truly cared for you and how genuinely worried he was. He was scared that he might have done something wrong to you.

He himself never knew how it got to this. At first, just like you, he had only intended to find some fun in the relationship you both had and not actually grow some feelings towards you, but the first time he ever met you, all he ever had thought in his head was to protect you at all cost and give you everything you wanted, spoil you with all his money and riches, give you forehead kisses and pleasure that can make you see stars. Since the start, he only thought of this as something platonic and that it was a part of the agreement you both had consent on, but as you two got to spend more time together, he always felt something blossom inside of him. He always looked forward to every day, mainly because he had you to wake up to. His usual stoic expression, completely turned into those that said 'sunshine' all spread out on his face. That's when he completely knew, it was not only the benefits he was up for, anymore. It was you and his love for you.

He was just your usual workaholic man, who had nothing in his head rather than work, work, and work. Not until the day he bumped into you on that one faithful day, when you were so drained from all the studying you had to do and decided to buy coffee. You were so intimidated by his face that he got you cowering in fear when you turned to look up at him. The only courage you could muster was so small that you were only able to give him a polite bow before you entered the coffee shop to buy your favorite cappuccino coffee.

He was so intrigued by you that the next day, during that same time, he waited for you in that same exact location, but you never showed up. Until later. You were so shocked from the sight of him. You feared he'd beat you into a pulp, so you hid your face with your hand, hoping he didn't see you, but luck wasn't on your side that day and decided to let Jaehyun notice your presence.

"Hey, I—"

"Sorry, sir. I'm quite busy, right now." You immediately cut him off and got inside the shop, Jaehyun following suit. Your eyes made its way back towards the older who was following behind you closely. You stopped in your tracks and turned around to look at him, retracting his body from looking through your shoulders, throughout the whole time smiling down at you with his dimples showing. "Excuse me, sir, but do I owe you with something?"

Jaehyun pursed his lips, thinking before smirking and leaning closer to your face, with you, all the while, pulling your head back. "Yes." He answered you with his hands shoved confidently inside his pants.

Your gaze averted from his mesmerizing eyes to the table that supported you and kept you from falling. You gulped and felt your lips go dry. "D-do you need money? I don't have much, but will 7,000 won be enough?" You fondled through your pockets and took out your wallet.

"What? No, no." He chuckled, one hand taken out from his pockets and scratching his eyebrows while he sighed. "I have an offer."

Your brows were pulled together looking up at him, curious. "What is it?"

"Give me your number and I'll tell you over the phone."

And that's how it all started. Of course, he told you about lying that you owed him something, either way you were thanking the God above that he created you as gullible as ever.

As of the moment, Jaehyun could only feel his nervousness rise as he continued to stare at your back. "M/n, please say something. You're making me feel so worried."

"Jaehyun..." You finally stopped walking and spoke, before throwing yourself into him, the impact suddenly taking all the air inside Jaehyun's lungs away. "Don't leave me... please." You pleaded, your arms around him going tighter.

Jaehyun softened and felt himself get blanketed over with relief. He raised his hand to put it on top of your head and caressed them softly and soothingly. "I won't, M/n. I promise you."

In the end, Jaehyun was the one who treated you with something to eat. You were sat at a bench near your class' booth, Jaehyun next to you, while you swayed your feet back and forth. "Hyunnie." You called out to him with a new nickname you came up with, Jaehyun choking on his burger letting out a few coughs while you patted his back, laughing. "How the hell do you eat a burger that it got you choking on it?"

His coughing finally stopped and looked at you with a surprised face. "The nickname. You never called me that before."

You pouted in reply and blushed in embarrassment. "Do you.. not like it?"

"No, of course not." He was quick to shake his head, then cleared his throat, looking away. "It's cute."

You were able to see the pink tint painting his cheeks that you always found cute, since it's a very rare sight to see. Teasingly, you peeked over and was able to confirm that he was, in fact, blushing from just the nickname you created. "Oh my gosh, you're blushing." You cooed and immediately, Jaehyun scoffed, facing you to land a small kiss on your lips that got you widening your eyes and wiping away the mocking smile you had on your face. Your fingers made its way up towards your lips, unable to speak.

"Now, tell me who's blushing." Jaehyun smirked.

You glared at him, but instead of feeling intimidated, he found it cute. "I'm just surprised, since you never really like to, er, kiss me on the lips." You whispered the last part, loud enough for only you and him to hear.

You two were so happy in each other's company, that you both forgot that Jaehyun had somewhere else to be. That being his work. He wouldn't have noticed the time passing, if it wasn't for the alarm he had set, knowing he'd lose track of time when he's around you.

You walked him to his car and saw him off, waving your hand at him, not leaving until he was finally out of sight. You put your hands back down and sighed happily, walking back towards where you should be: at the booth where you should be finishing the preparation.

"So, how was the quick date?" Jeno asked you with a smirk, the sleeves of his shirt pushed back inside the hole that connected it to the shirt, showing his perfectly built muscles.

"It was great! Save for the part where I received death glares at the canteen. That felt terrible." You shuddered at the thought, but smiled again. "That aside, it was great."

"Your schedule didn't change? Are there still room for practice later?" Jeno asked you for the nth time that day. He's been asking you since you entered the classroom.

"It didn't, Jeno. Why are you so eager with me being present in the practice?" You chuckled at him, deciding to help him pack the treat bags you will give out to your customers.

"I just can't be left alone there with people I don't know. I'm an awkward person." Jeno told you.

"Jeno. You're literally known by all the students here and you're scared because they're strangers to you? I bet they all even want to be friends with you." You said, but Jeno just shook his head, his hair moving along with him.

"No, M/n. You must and need to attend the practice, either way." Jeno demanded of you.

You rolled your eyes at him and sighed deeply through your nose in defeat. "Fine, fine." Jeno's eye smile appeared and let out a small 'yes' making you chuckle.

"Hey, M/n." A voice started from outside the booth and saw a girl with her arms crossed, looking down at you whilst you seated at the ground. You looked up at her, but she didn't look friendly. She looked angry than friendly.

Your eyes flickered toward Jeno, then back to the girl and smiled. "Yeah?"

"Don't give me that smile, you whore." She spat at you, all of a sudden.

Your eyes closed shut, your mouth wide open and your forefinger raised up while you pushed it towards her way and scoffing. Your eyelids tore open and you smirked at the girl. "Excuse me? Whore? Who you calling a whore?"

"Listen, midget—"

"No, you listen here, Barbie." You said, a mocking tone with the last word. "You full on plastic, bitch. Get away from my sight. You look like a parasite."

The girl gasped in shock and opted to pull on your hair, but Jeno held her by her wrist and angrily stared at her. "You heard him. Get away. I'm not afraid to punch a person, even a girl, if they're purpose was to mistreat and shame on an innocent person." Jeno threw her hand away like it was trash, sending the girl from moving two steps back before stomping her foot and turning on her heels to walk away.

You could still see Jeno glaring at the girl while you looked at him in shock. "Wow, wow. Look at you."

"Sh. I'm not done yet." Jeno hushed you, before he continued his work. "You were saying?"

"Nothing. Was just shocked you told that girl off. I could have handled myself just fine, but thanks to you, I'm saved from causing a ruckus." You said, Jeno huffing through the nose.

"Seriously, you." He sighed pinching the bridge of his nose and knitted his brows. "Stop making the problem bigger."

"No way. I need to put up a fight. If I don't, they'd see me as someone weak." You defended yourself.

"And you can't even handle death glares that's being sent towards you?"

You were about to speak and fight back, but he was right. "That's... that's a different matter."

"Sure, it isn't, M/n." He said rolling his eyes.

Later that afternoon, past 5 p.m., you and Jeno excused yourselves from the class, since you have a dance practice for your performance on the opening of the foundation day. Out of habit, you skipped beside Jeno who was happy that you got to attend the practice today. Again.

You never really liked the person who choreographed the whole song. It was under a genre you thought you could never pull off or fit in, so your confidence was at a very low level. During practices, though, you try your best not to make it obvious that you were uncomfortable for that certain concept, but you still had to be seen making a lot of mistakes, some of the other students who joined clearly agitated. You could only bow and bow and bow at the mistake you knew you clearly had done, feeling guilty for the reason why always had to start again from the top. The reason why you never really got along well with these students.

You have arrived at the practice room, taking quiet steps as you both entered the venue trying your best not to make a sound. The intense gazes you received from the other students didn't come unnoticed by you, the reason why you pulled your knees closer to your chest as you buried your face in it. Clearly, they were enjoying those two few days you were absent, since they got to finish practice early and with no interruption nor mistakes. But, now that you're around, they knew exactly what awaited them.

Jeno saw you curled up into a ball and eyes making its way up to the students who looked so angry with you making him frown. "M/n. Don't mind them. You're actually doing even greater than them." He tried to cheer you up, so you acknowledged it with a smile.

"Thanks, Jeno. But, I don't think that will change the fact that my uneasiness with the dance is the reason why we have to start over and over again." You sighed and placed your head back down on your knees, Jeno drawing circles on your back.

A moment later, the mentor came walking in, displeased to see you present. "Oh, welcome back... M/n." He stated before you could hear those loud snickers coming from the students. You and Jeno were the first ones to stand in position, the others following suit. The mentor's face lit up with an idea on his mind. "Can everyone please take a seat for a couple of minutes?" He smiled, then looking at you. "Except for you, L/n."

Jeno's eyes fell upon you, a worried look on his face, mouthing 'I'll be fine' to reassure him as he sat back down along with the other students until it was only you and the mentor left standing. "You think telling your 'boyfriend' about me would scare me?" He mocked you with your head still hung low. "You have to try better than that." He smirked, pulling a chair to seat on it. His legs were on either side of the chair, so his chest was pressed upon the back rest of the chair to face you. "Start."

You were startled by the sudden order and went into position, but you only started fidgeting out of fear. "Where... I.. sir.. Do I stand—"

"L/n!" He yelled at you, making you jump from the sudden raise of his voice. You knew telling Jaehyun was a bad idea. "Fix yourself, will you? The performance is due tomorrow and you're such a mess." The misery you were caged in were the happiness of the students as they started to giggle, your fist clenching hard until your knuckles turned white.

The music started, but you were still nowhere from moving your body. You just stood there, head hanging low while gnashing your teeth. You weren't angry at the mentor. You were angry at yourself. You were angry that you couldn't do any better. You practiced the dance so hard, yet it were still so far from perfecting it. You just wished some kind of spirit would possess you and lead your body.

The whole place started to laugh at you as they watched you shamelessly froze on your position. You felt a small jab on your ribs that made you open your clenched fists and saw Jeno standing right beside you with a grin on his face, your expression softening as he started to lead the dance. Slowly, you felt your own body move to the beat and rhythm of the song, being at the same flow with Jeno. The students only watched while the song ended.

A slow clap from your mentor was heard, a smile plastered on his face. "Way to impress me you two, huh?" He stood from the chair and waisted his arms. "L/n." His eyes moved to you, expecting yet another scolding. "I'm proud of you. Keep up that confidence and I just know you'll do great." You felt a smile creeping its way up to your face, before the mentor closed in on you and ruffled your hair. "Alright, everyone. From the top."

-----

The practice ended at exactly eight o' clock in the evening and you were already feeling drained, your sweat soaked shirt sticking to your body. Your forehead glistened with sweat, that ran down to the side of your cheeks. You panted heavily and flopped your body down on the polished floor.

Why that late you ask? Well, you and Jeno decided to stay for a few hours to polish the dance, him pointing out your mistakes and going back to the steps to correct you. You were grateful Jeno was a very patient guy, so whenever you made a mistake or wasn't executing the dance properly, he'd just chuckle and help you with your 'cute mistakes', at least that's what he called it.

"Finally..." You panted, Jeno settling himself beside you, his limbs sprawled all over the floor. "Done."

"You did so great, M/n! I knew you could pull this off." Jeno gave you a compliment that made you giggle, a hand on your chest to catch your breathe.

"And it was all thanks to you." You told him.

Jeno shook his head. "Ey. The only thing I did was help your body to loosen up."

"Exactly." The cute noises coming out of your mouth once more. "Do you think we should practice more?" You asked the older who moved his head to look at you.

"Still up for one more?" He smiled knowingly at you, while you nodded at him. You both stood up from where you both lied and you went to your position with Jeno moving to the speakers to play the song for the last time.

The minute you both finished, you were so exhausted that your knees couldn't hold themselves up anymore and you fell to the ground, groaning. You were panting heavily, starting to even your breathing at the same time laughing proudly at yourself for how well you've done. "When I get home, I'm gonna take a shower and then, throw myself on the bed and sleep."

Jeno could only laugh and you two were left with half an hour talking about all the things in life. You listened to him rant about how the mentor was being more harsh on you than the other students, but you only shook the topic off telling him that it no longer mattered and that he should already move on. You had also thanked him for helping you, during that time when you had to do the dance routine all by yourself. You really didn't know what else to do than to just stand there and sulk.

A few minutes later, both of you were now starting to pack, Jeno having to make a quick visit to the restroom, leaving you all alone inside the studio. You were changing into a dry shirt, when the voice of the janitress from behind the window made your body go tense as you jumped and turned towards her. "Oh, fuck." You sighed out in relief, holding your hand close to your chest. "You scared me, ma'am."

Her eyes turned into those that looked like crescents and smiled. "My bad. Probably shouldn't have passed by unannounced." She nodded and proceeded to mop the hallway floor.

You were about to ask her about a certain matter that was troubling you, but when you lifted your head to face the woman, she was not there anymore. "Uh.. probably left for something." You shrugged it off and went back to scrolling through your feeds, the certain feeling of being watched sending chills down your spine. The silence was so deafening that you started to whistle to a song you were currently into, just to help calm the unnerving feeling. You started to feel all the hair on your body stand on its end when a very harsh opening of the door sent you off flying, then to the ground your heart beating so fast. "Shit!"

Jeno was obviously confused why you got so scared by him just pushing the door open, but he was also laughing at your state which made you glare at him. He helped you stand back up to your feet, as you dusted your pants from any invisible dirt. "What the hell happened to you?"

"You scared the shits out of me. That's what happened." You scoffed at him, hitching your back higher onto your shoulders. "Let's go." You two vacated the room, making sure to lock it, but you told Jeno not to since the janitress was still yet to finish cleaning, but Jeno was greatly puzzled at what you had said.

"What in the world are you talking about?" Jeno laughed lightly before proceeding to lock the door and hung an arm around your shoulder.

"I saw her through the window." You added.

Jeno shook his head in disbelief and didn't fall for your trick to scare him off. "First, the school does not hire a janitress or a janitor, since they have working students. Second, so the dance major students don't get distracted, the window inside the room is tinted, so you basically don't see anything outside."

You felt your heart sink at the revelation as you felt all your blood get drained. "Are you... s-sure?"

"Yeah." Jeno answered your question. You slowly turned your head back towards the room, the windows and saw a black figure waving their hands at you that made you sprinting off to the entrance, leaving a dumbfounded Jeno as he followed behind you. "What the hell, M/n?"

"Shut... up! You were not the one left inside the dance room, so you wouldn't know how much I'm fucking scared, right—"

"M/n!"

"FUCK!" You screamed on the top of your lungs, stomping your foot and punching the air for no apparent reason. "Jaehyun, you... nevermind. Just take me home, please. I think I'm already fucking wasted." Jaehyun, who was on his casual attire, approached you and placed a kiss on top of your head.

#x male reader #bottom male reader #bxb #male reader #idol x male reader #fanfiction #kpop #nct #nct x male reader #jung jaehyun x male reader #jaehyun x male reader #jung yunoh x male reader

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mauve-studies · 3 years

Text

Tips for Studying When You Have ADHD/Never Learned How

Hi everyone! I have a few tips that I’ve gathered over the years to help cope with your brain not working like everyone else’s.

1. Find a way to turn part of your brain off.

For me, this means having something that is stimulating in the background, like a podcast or loooong video. I really like stuff like Critical Role, if it’s too funny it just distracts me so I recommend something serious but not really important to know.

Conversely...

2. Find a way to turn your body off.

I do this by crocheting. It’s like productive stimming, it’s fun, the progress mounts super quickly, and you can redo something over and over if you need to. I use this time to listen to something important. Because my hands and eyes have something stimulating them, my ears are free to listen intently. This is when you should listen to an audiobook or a recorded lecture.

3. Don’t read and have someone speaking in your language at the same time.

That’s a recipe for not understanding either thing and having your time be wasted, essentially. If you’re reading, keep any background to something that you can tune out but still have in your mind, like lofi or classical music. Sometimes I’ll even use albums that I’ve listened to hundreds of times because my brain goes on autopilot for those.

4. Keep your workspace as busy as you need, but don’t let it get cluttered.

If you are a maximalist like me (or love hoarding stationery) your desk might be a little... much. And that’s okay! As long as you can work with visual stimulation. This comes down to personal preference, but if you know that having few things helps your focus, try to downsize, or vice versa!

5. Structure your study time and plan your breaks.

Structure is so important for my mental health and function, so I always recommend it to others. Plan your study time, lay out what you want to learn by the end, and have some sort of timer or cue for when it’s time to take a break. I recommend short breaks every 90 minutes or so, and a long one after 4+ hours. If studying in tiny chunks doesn’t work for you, don’t do it! If you need bigger blocks of time that’s totally fine, don’t feel guilty about not being able to focus properly on 10 minute sessions.

6. Repetition is soooo important for conceptual things.

Math and science can be especially difficult for people with ADHD due to memory problems. It is very important that you work at these problems and repeat them over and over to get the concept memorized in your long term memory so you can reach it continually. So, do your assigned problems, do the other problems in the book, find some on Khan Academy, and do them until it’s ingrained. It’s so worth it, I promise.

7. Set your own deadlines and STICK TO THEM

If your procrastinate until the 11th hour and then produce decent work, I completely understand and see you. However, work with your executive dysfunction and trick your brain. Set deadlines for yourself and rewards for sticking to them, punishments if you don’t, and actually enforce them. Maybe if you don’t finish your rough draft by Thursday night, you have to finish it before you can FaceTime your friends. If you do finish it on time, call and play some games together. It helps to have a study buddy to keep you accountable and set deadlines with so you can both motivate each other and be accountable. ***Be very careful to not let this affect your mental health!!! Do not burn yourself out and lose your friends, your mental health comes first!!!***

Finally

8. Do not beat yourself up for not being entirely productive all the time.

You are human. You are already at a disadvantage due to your brain’s chemistry. Work with your brain, don’t berate it. Eat some candy or drink some Gatorade to give it the dopamine it needs to keep focusing. Take down time for yourself. Let yourself have free time to just exist, practice regular self care and hygiene. You are strong, valid, and brave for going against the odds and pursuing learning at this disadvantage. I am very proud of you, and I know you can succeed.

#studyblr #adhd culture #adhd studyblr #actually adhd #adult adhd #adhd problems #adhd tips #study aesthetic #study tips #study notes #study #ref #important #study motivation #studyspo #advice #self care #learning #dark academia

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yoonpobs · 3 years

Text

bad boy good thing iv.

pairing: jeon jungkook x oc

genre: angst, smut, fluff, miscommunication (we hate her lol), pining

warnings: smut, jungkook is really an asshole, the angst hurts a lot tbh, unhealthy relationships (?)

words: 2, 105

summary: a series of drabbles where you're confused and jungkook's confusing

a glimpse into the past

Jungkook’s been to a total of two graduations his entire life—one was his middle school’s graduation that seemed more like a farewell party and his older brother’s college one. Now, he can say that he’s attended three. But he’s never felt like this—never felt dread to say a temporary goodbye to a face he’s been so accustomed to seeing.

Maybe that’s why he’s in such a sour mood as his peers hugged their seniors' goodbyes, smiles on their face while they engaged in chatter about the future. Jungkook’s always been hard on parting and today is no different. Especially with the constant reminders at every corner of the hallways, streams of red and blue painting the ceilings with a big fat ‘happy graduation to the seniors!’ Mocking him on his journey to his classes.

He almost wants to slap some sense into himself. Because why was he terrified for the beginning of a new chapter that wasn’t his story to tell? Why was he dreading the moment that the seniors collected their diplomas and walked off the stage; and out of his life?

But he doesn’t do that; because the fear is as addictive as the excitement he feels when he thinks of you. A conflicting and tortuous juxtaposition of the beautiful day for a valedictorian and her younger friend.

“Jungkook!” A voice calls, and when he turns he sees Taehyung barrelling towards him with two people trailing closely behind.

When Taehyung plummets into Jungkook’s chest with an oof, but all Jungkook can focus on; despite the ache in his chest, is you.

You’re so pretty. But that’s nothing new for Jungkook. However, you were smiling, soft and sweet like the person who stayed up during her finals to tutor Jungkook on math concepts and the same girl who supported him through his football trials in junior year.

But you were grown, and the robe was the testimony of your age and maturity—the level of intelligence that you possess only grew with time and now you were walking towards him with a sense of quiet assuredness that he’s always admired you for.

Jungkook’s sure he’s gaping but he’s never been able to control himself around you.

“Can you stop gawking at her already?” Taehyung complains, twisting the skin between Jungkook’s armpit in retaliation.

Jungkook burns but scowls at the older boy who simply snickers in response.

“I’m so glad you’re graduating.” Jungkook snaps.

Taehyung snorts, “If I go she goes.”

Jungkook purses his lips as he readies himself for another retort, but you arrive and the first thing he notices is how gentle you smell. His favourite scent in principle, a whiff of laundry detergent accompanied with the light floral perfume he remembers his mother gifting you for your birthday.

“You’re gonna miss us, aren’t you?” Is the first thing Jimin says when he greets the younger boy with a ruffle to his head.

Jungkook glowers in embarrassment as he tries to fight him off, and despite his shorter stature in height—Jimin was in fact, quite strong.

Regardless of his flustered state, you smile at him warmly and perhaps Jungkook is biased when it comes to you because he’s sure you’ve always smiled the same, but every tilt of your lips evoke an array of different feelings in Jungkook’s chest.

“The two of you are like dumb and dumber so no—not really. God knows he’s finally granted my wish for emancipation.” Jungkook grumbles.

Taehyung feigns offence with a hand to his chest, leaning his head against Jungkook’s shoulders while he rolls his eyes.

Then he remembers you, the girl who just smiles as the world will always do her good.

“But I’ll miss Noona, though.” He says, and he hopes the shakiness of his voice isn’t obvious. “She’s the only one that doesn’t tease me.”

You grin up at Jungkook, giggling when Jimin and Taehyung gape at the younger boy’s audacity.

“Yah. You call her Noona and not us Hyung?!” Taehyung screeches were loud enough for the group of you to wince at his loudness.

“Don’t forget that you would have never have met her if it weren’t for us, you brat.” Jimin reminds, though not maliciously.

Jungkook does thank the stars for them introducing him to you. Because he doubts otherwise you’d ever interact with him. You were always in your own bubble, tucked away in a safe space filled with your own sense of solace and comfort. And Jungkook admired that.

He liked being alone, but he never wanted to be lonely. You were a breath of fresh air when you taught him the lines between loneliness and being physically alone; and how you learnt to never conflate the two. You were independent and bright, but warm and welcoming—and Jungkook remembers that these feelings weren’t just a floor away anymore.

“Ignore them, Kook.” You sigh. “Gonna miss you too.”

Jungkook feels himself melt because you say it so sweetly and sincerely.

Taehyung and Jimin ruin his love-blurred lenses by gagging at your blatant display of affection towards the younger boy.

“The two of you are so gross.” Jimin groans, earning a nod from his other half.

You roll your eyes when all Jungkook does is flush at the insinuation.

“Unlike the two of you, we make the better and more rational pair.” You chastise. “Don’t we, Kook?”

And the nickname he’s grown to love though he has a love-hate relationship with it slips off your tongue and he finds himself agreeing with you.

“These two idiots are a quarter of a brain-cell combined on a good day,” Jungkook mutters.

You burst out into laughter, rubbing a calming hand onto his shoulder and he feels the dread come in. Because this was no longer something he could reach out to when you went to college.

“Whatever.” Jimin scoffs.

Then the PA system sounds, and the principal calls for the graduates to gather at the hall. And it represents all of Jungkook’s worries in an announcement and he’s not ready to let you go yet.

“That’s our call.” You declare, eyes darting to the other seniors who pull apart from their juniors to rush to the hall.

Jungkook’s eyes widen one last time before Jimin and Taehyung both wrap their arms around Jungkook tightly, murmuring a much more sincere and grateful remark than their previous chides. And he feels slightly bad that he can’t respond because his brain is far more focused on your lone figure, who eyes him with sad yet gentle eyes.

“You’ll come to our role call, right?” Jimin asks.

Jungkook gulps because all he can focus on is your face.

“Y-yeah. Course’.” He mumbles. He feels the need to say something—do something before people crowd you after it’s over. Jungkook would never stand a chance.

He seems rooted in his feet, Jimin and Taehyung already trailing off with their arms around each other and words of their future in the air. You smile at Jungkook—and it’s the same—but his hands reach out before he can think twice.

Jungkook grabs your wrist before you can leave, gulping to himself when you stare at him with wide eyes.

“You okay?” You ask softly.

No, he’s not, because his heart is beating so fast and he doesn’t want this day to come to an end.

“I-I’m okay.” He chokes, “I just—don’t you have a parting gift for me?” Jungkook blurts before he can rationalise what the fuck did he even mean.

But Jungkook just stares at you like a deer caught in the headlights while you tilt your head at him endearingly. He hopes that his pulse doesn’t emanate from his grasp, but your wrist is small, and it feels just right in his palm.

Your lips are twitching as a grin threatens itself on your expression, and he sees the mischief in your eyes that come out every once in a while.

“Aren’t you supposed to be giving me a gift, Jeon?” You tease, and Jungkook is so soft.

He snorts, a little glad that you didn’t point out his sudden grip on your wrist.

“But you’re leaving me.” He pouts.

You roll your eyes and take a step closer to him until you’re directly in front of him. And he sees your features up close and God—did he say you were pretty?—well because you’re even prettier up close and he loses all sense of thought when you’re smiling up at him with bright eyes.

“I’m always a call away.” You say softly, gently tugging at his hand; and it’s crazy to think that you were the same older girl that was usually timid reaching out to him in a way that was shy but so you.

Even with the chattering of other students, Jungkook only hears your subdued voice.

“It’s not the same.” Jungkook sighs, and he’s slightly aware that he was whining. But you don’t seem to be bothered.

“You’re probably going to forget about me.” You scoff and it’s light, but he can see the slight furrow of your brows. “You’re Jeon Jungkook. You’ll do great.” You add softly.

Jungkook purses his lips and wants to tell you that it wasn’t possible. You took up space in his life, both in school (well, not anymore) and in his mind. You and your wonderful mind.

“Says the valedictorian.” Jungkook huffs.

You pout, “You know that isn’t long-term. What if I just peak in high school and … you know …” You sigh, shaking your head, “I’m not outgoing like Jimin or a social butterfly like Taehyung. Neither am I as friendly and likeable like you are, Jungkook. I’m just … boring.”

Jungkook freezes because while he knew you were on the shier side; the louder than life tendencies you had were small but abundant. You didn’t need to speak louder than anyone in a room to get your points across, you were soft and empathetic and led people in organisations to see the good in the work they did.

Your genuine nature drew people in, even though you’d flush under attention and praise—and if Jungkook could—he’d scream it out to the world. But you were in front of him, and he figured that was enough.

“Don’t say that.” Jungkook snaps and his tone causes you to flinch as you stare at him with wide eyes, “Don’t … put yourself down like that. You’re great, _____. You’re intelligent and kind. Just because you’re different doesn’t mean you’re boring. There are situations in this world that need people like you. There are people that find comfort in a quiet soul because you’re introspective and thoughtful. People like …”

Jungkook exhales when you stare at him so earnestly, and his ears turn red. “People like me. We need people like you in our lives.”

Your mouth falls open as you blatantly stare at Jungkook with wide eyes; he’s on the border of being absolutely mortified and running away so he wouldn’t be the subject of your obvious ogling.

But then a soft smile makes its way onto your face, and you’re tugging Jungkook by the hand and into a warm hug.

Despite him being younger than you, he’s always been taller and bigger than you were. And it was a sense of security he felt in your presence rather than your physical entity that would never be replaced with anything else.

“You really grew up, huh?” You say, a giggle in your chest.

Jungkook rolls his eyes but accepts the way you rest your head on his chest. He’s never had you this close before, and he hates that it’s on the day he needs to say goodbye.

“I’ve always been this way.” Jungkook answers. He also thinks: I’ve always been here. For you.

“Thank you, Jungkook.” You say softly, pulling away even though Jungkook wants to keep you close.

“Anytime.” He smiles widely at you, and a classmate of yours calls your name as you turn to give them a nod of acknowledgement before you’re turning back to Jungkook with a cheeky smile on your face.

“Here’s your gift.” You inform him.

“I was kidding—”

And before you can respond, you’re placing both hands on his shoulder and on your tippy-toes to deliver a kiss to his cheek.

Jungkook is stunned and he isn’t able to process it fast enough. But you’re already offering him an equally flustered smile with the tip of your ears turning red before you’re waving shyly and tittering off to the hall.

Jungkook blinks, and a hand reaches to touch his cheek.

He looks up, and groans—because how the hell was he going to survive high school now?

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thefanficmonster · 3 years

Text

Caught Red-handed

Corpse Husband x Reader (Gender Neutral)

Warnings: Swearing, Struggling with migraines

Genre: Fluff, Comfort, RPF (Real Person Fic)

Summary: Having suffered from migraines all their life, Y/N knows better than to give them much attention or let them hinder their work too much. However, their boyfriend is a lot more worried than they are and has taken it as his personal duty to ease their pain as much as he possibly can.

Requested by Anon. Hi dear! Thank you so much for your request, I’m so sorry it has taken me so long to get to it, write and post it, but here it finally is and I hope you come across it and read it! I’ve never experienced migraines nor have I known someone who has so if I’ve misrepresented or written any misinformation, anyone who catches it, feel free to let me know either in the comments or in my inbox/messages! Love, Vy ❤

The first time I got a headache was in the middle of math class in eighth grade. I remember it so distinctly because I had never before experienced such sudden and such intense pain. I got to go home early that day and spent a good portion of the day trying to sleep it off but to no avail.

Since then I’ve grown used to having to deal with a pain so strong it renders me unable to function for a whole day about two times a month. Sometimes, I even try to be stubborn with it - I try to push through as much work as I can despite the migraine, but that never works out for a long time considering it ends up crippling me in the end. That’s never kept me from trying over and over again though!

Now, to contrast my nonchalance and even annoyance with these pesky attacks, is my boyfriend Corpse’s concern over them. I’ve tried explaining to him that I’ve grown used to them and that I try not to let them bother me and that he shouldn’t stress over them so much but I may as well be talking to a wall because all he has to do is see me squint my eyes or cringe and he enters concerned-mother mode. Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate it to no end, I just don’t want him worrying over something so small. Also, a minor convenience: if the migraine doesn’t hinder me from tending to my tasks, Corpse will. He’ll make sure I’m off the task I’m working and transported into bed in an instant.

That’s why I’m now clenching my jaw, struggling to maintain a poker face as I work on an important project I have to send to my boss by the start of next week. I’ve got plenty of time, but I like to stay on top of my work so it doesn’t pile on top of me, you know what I’m saying. Corpse is sitting on the couch next to me, casually glancing at me every now and then while remaining quiet as to not disturb me. So far so good, he hasn’t noticed anything and, if I didn’t know any better I would sigh in relief. There’s nothing to trigger the pain to arise any further - the lights are dim, I’m staying hydrated, and I downed two painkillers in the bathroom about an hour and a half ago - so I’m sure I’ll be in the clear at least until dinner.

“Wanna watch a movie when you’re done?“ Corpse asks, “Unless you’re tired or anything...“

I flash him a grateful smile, giving his knee a squeeze of reassurance, “I’d love to, babe. But I can’t promise that I won’t fall asleep.”

He chuckles, “Yeah, I know you’ve got a tendency of doing that.” Giving me a side-glance he adds, “It’s cute.”

I roll my eyes, already sensing a blush creeping up on my cheeks and neck which I hide by turning to face my laptop screen. One thing I can’t hide though is the wide grin that’s spread across my face as I mutter: “Shut up.”

Just then, a particularly sharp jolt of pain courses through my head, testing that ability to maintain a resting face. Thankfully, Corpse is turned in the opposite direction, searching for his phone, so I allow myself a brief cringe at the discomfort.

Guess the painkillers are dying down on me, I think to myself, a second away from sighing exasperatedly at the thought that I have to down two more. It was wishful of me to think I could enjoy the luxury of a dull ache until dinner, now the migraine is straight up mocking me.

I quietly stand up from the couch and make my way to the bathroom so I can take another dose of aspirin because I don’t think I’ll be able to focus on my work for very long if it keeps hitting me with this intensity. Opening the door to the small cabinet above the sink, I automatically reach out for the bottle of pills but stop when I see a surprise.

Directly in front of the bottle stands a note written in, you guessed it, Corpse’s handwriting.

‘Already losing effect, huh? When are you thinking of coming clean?‘

Well shoot, am I that transparent?

I sheepishly exit the bathroom, walking back into the living room where Corpse greets me with the same stance as a parent greeting their kid who’s gotten home past curfew: legs crossed, arms folded over his chest, one eyebrow raised, the whole nine yards.

“Yeah, they’re already losing effect.“ I admit, a small apologetic smile tugging at the corners of my mouth, my cheeks burning with an embarrassed blush. “And I wasn’t gonna tell you at all.” I hurry to add: “Please don’t be mad though.“

Corpse shifts slightly, his gaze giving me a onceover as he contemplates how to pursue the case. I’ve already got several arguments/defenses ready - the perks of working for a lawyer - but I know he’ll dismiss all of them no matter how strong they might come off as in court. Bottom line: even statements that would fly in court can’t fly with Corpse sometimes. Especially when my health and well-being are the topic of observation.

“What have we said about lying?“ He finally asks, causing me to cringe and ball my fists in guilt.

However, I still have my arguments ready: “You never asked me so I never technically lied.” One might say I have quite the audacity to plead not guilty right now, even though I’ve been caught red-handed, but what can I say, I’m stubborn in nature. And Corpse knows this, he’s just testing me for his own amusement.

“Poor excuse, Y/N.“ He says with disapproval, shaking his head and fully embracing his disappointed parent persona. “You’re lucky I’m feeling generous today. So, as punishment for hiding the truth from me, you are to ditch that project you’ve been bugging yourself over and come cuddle and watch a movie with me. Bonus points for you if you fall asleep.“

I needn’t be told twice - not only will it wipe that look off his features but it’ll also get earn me a movie night with the additional benefit of cuddling with my boyfriend? - how could I refuse?

I can’t help it, I just gotta push my luck here and poke the bear with a stick, “If the punishments are so sweet I might start being dishonest more often.“

Corpse rolls his eyes, scooting on the couch and tapping the space he’s freed up for me, “I said I was feeling generous, don’t bet on it happening often though.”

Alright, enough luck-pushing, I should be grateful for this generosity instead. I should be using it to the max.

So, what’s stopping you from doing just that?

Good question, brain, good question.

Head still pounding just not as intensely, I slip under the thin soft comforter to find myself not only wrapped in it but also in Corpse’s arm, his warm embrace bringing me instant comfort, walking me on the tight-rope of falling asleep right away.

“Sneaky bastard.“ I attempt to mutter, yawning halfway through.

I feel his lips on the top of my head, placing a quick and gentle kiss in my hair before he says, “You’re welcome, babe.”

Count your lucky stars, Y/N. You’ve got one of the good ones.

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daydream-disposal · 3 years

Text

Wormhole

Steve is laying on his bed wearing his pyjamas, his eyes droopy and his mind hazy with tiredness but still, he insists on texting his friends. A normal tuesday, it appears.

Until suddenly, a big blue ring light starts to shine out of nowhere in the middle of his room. Steve sits on the bed, eyes wide. Suddenly a person gets out from inside the light. A boy about his height, his big honey eyes hiding behind his dark hair that was covering almost all of his freckled face. He was wearing black pants, a white button up and a coat. He looked drenched but still, he looked very handsome.

Is Steve too sleep deprived? Is he dreaming? Is he imagining this? He doesn't know.

"Oh thank god, it's you" the boy holds Steve's shoulders and kisses his cheek quickly, dropping a little device on the bed beside him.

"Um. Hello? W-who are you?" Steve freezes, trying to understand what just happened. He's not imagining it then, since the kiss felt very real. He would've blushed if the situation wasn't really scary.

"What? It's me. I guess I might look a little different, I've been traveling around for a while. Ugh my clothes are gross. I'm just gonna change real quick, okay?" the guy rambles walking to Steve's closet and opening the door. He searches for something, getting all his clothes out of the way. Steve frowns. What the fuck is this dude doing?

"Did you move my stuff again?"

"I literally don't know what you're talking about." Steve slowly gets up and walks towards the door.

"C'mon Steve, stop messing around, they were right here" he half laughs and keeps searching. A shiver goes down Steve's spine. He knows his name. Is he a spy? An alien? Is he here to harm him? Steve grabs his bat carefully and places it on his neck.

"I'd appreciate if you stopped messing with my stuff and left. I don't know who you are and why you're here! Just leave me alone!" he says with a rough voice.

Eli turns to face Steve, ready to laugh and ask 'what is this, a prank?' but his smile drops as soon as he sees Steve with the bat and a serious expression.

"Steve, calm down! It's me, your best friend, Eli Pepperjack. Do you seriously not recognize me?"

"Wrong! My best friend is Jim Lake and everybody knows that. I've never seen you before in my life!"

Steve and Jim being best friends??? Something is definitely Not Right. Eli looks around in disbelief. Now that he notices, Steve looks... younger. The room looks different too. It's the same style, but the colors are all wrong. He peeks outside the window and the street is slightly different too. Oh my god.

Did he just travelled to a parallel universe? One that Steve doesn't know him? He knew the wormhole could do that, but only on command! How did it malfunctioned so badly??

Steve adjusts his hands on the bat, getting Eli out of his thoughts.

"Wait! Wait! I can explain! I can prove that I know you!"

Steve considers, still not moving from the position he's in. The boy seems scared but somehow his eyes are shining, inviting. Steve sighs.

"Ok. Go on." he raises an eyebrow, curiously.

"Your favorite color is blue. You favorite food is pancakes. You can't have spicy food. You had a crush on Claire Nunes"

"Those are really basic and you could easily be lying. Or spying on me! And everybody had a crush on Claire!" Steve shouts, losing his patience.

"Okay, look." Eli reaches for his back pocket, taking out his wallet and handing Steve a picture of them hugging and smiling, doing the Creepslayerz hand gesture to the camera.

"You like nerdy movies like Gun Robot and Earth Invaders in secret because you don't want people to know. You don't know basic math but that's alright because you're a really great actor and you're very good at sports. Sometimes you let your insecurities get to you and that's why you act like you're superior to everyone else. But you're actually a really nice person. You care a lot about people, so much that you saved my life a thousand times before. You're funny and brave and I love you for that" Eli blurted out without even thinking.

"Wow, okay, that's scary. How is all of this possible?" He puts the bat down and stares at the picture, not believing what he's seeing.

"It's possible because I was traveling through that thing" Eli points to the wormhole device on the bed. Steve reaches it and throws it his way.

"Thanks. It's a wormhole, it's extraterrestrial technology. I've been living in another planet but I try to visit as much as I can. It malfunctioned this time. I'm guessing I ended up in a parallel universe" Eli says matter of factly, clicking the device on his hand. A blue hologram appears in front of them. Steve doesn't recognize the language on it.

"Hold up, are you telling me I'm dating an alien?"

"I literally just told you I'm from another universe and you decided to focus on that?"

"Well yeah" he shrugged.

Eli sighed, smiling.

"No, I'm human. I'm Earth's ambassador on the planet Arkiridion-5."

"Ok but are we dating...?" Steve blushes at him.

"Yes. We are."

"Oh sweet! Point for the Palchuk!" He punched the air. Eli laughs through his nose, shaking his head but still focused on the device.

"Can I ask you some questions?"

"Yeah, go on"

"How did it happen... How did we even... do it?" Steven didn't know how to ask this, but as if he was reading his mind, the brown haired boy answered quickly.

"Well, when we started getting close people just assumed. But our families are okay with it, if that's what you're asking"

"Cool. Alright." Steve knew he was bi for a long time now. He was just afraid of telling his family and friends. What if they got disappointed? What if they couldn't love him? What if he was left behind?

"How will I know if they're like this here too?" Steve asked in a quiet voice after a few seconds of silence and just the bleeping of the device.

"I'm pretty sure they love you in every universe. I know I do." Eli sinceraly stated, not even looking up. Steve had a hard time believing someone cared about him and loved him enough to say something so soft like that. He looked at the picture on his hands again. They were sharing a smile so genuine, their eyes meeting in such a sweet way, like they meant the whole world to each other.

"And how did we meet?" he leaned on the closet, crossing his arms. Eli just kept clicking away.

"At school. We didn't like each other at first, but we figured it out" he exhaled. "Took a while, but we did."

"Why? What happened?"

Eli thought about the years his Steve used to be mean at him and shove him into lockers. It was sad, but he knew there was good in him. Maybe this Steve could do it differently.

"Just... be nice."

"I am nice!" Eli stopped what he was doing, raising an eyebrow on Steve's direction. "Alright, I'll be nicer."

"Good. What year is it?"

"2018"

"Woah, okay, I'm so far off." he clicked a few more times, the big blue ring light popping up in the middle of the room again.

"Wait, you're leaving already?"

"Yeah. My Steve is waiting for me at home."

"But I still have so many questions!"

"Don't worry, it's gonna be alright. Nice to meet you. I hope I see you soon." And with that, he disappeared with the light, leaving Steve alone in his room. He looks down to his hands, still holding the picture strongly. He smiles.

"I hope so too."

Steve didn't remember his name. He tried to think back but at the time he was panicking at the thought of "CUTE BOY IN MY ROOM!" and focusing too hard on the fact that said boy was from another universe. So of course his ADHD brain would forget his name.

But this didn't keep Steve from looking. He was never this excited to go to school before. He started paying more attention to his surroundings, hoping he would spot the mysterious boy somewhere.

Instead, he spotted a fight. "Just be nice" he thought. The older boys being mean to the smaller ones does seem like a good moment to be nice. Also, it was just not fair.

"Hey, why don't you pick someone your size?" Steve approached the bully, tapping him on the shoulder with his eyebrows pinched.

"Ugh. Why do you always have to ruin the party, Palchuk? You had potential but you insist on being on the wrong side" he tries to push Steve, asking for a fight. Steve scoffs and holds the boy's wrist.

"Just let them go. You know you can't win against me." The bully grunts and shakes his wrist from Steve's hold. He nods to his friends and they leave, muttering amongst themselves.

Steve turns to help the other boys out of the ground, offering a hand. The first boy refuses, getting up fast and running away. And that's when finally, Steve sees him. He looks smaller than the boy in his room, his hair is shorter and he was wearing nerdy glasses. But it was definitely him. He would recognize that smile and those eyes anywhere.

"Thanks. Steve, right?" the boy said, holding his hand and getting up. Steve was at a loss of words. He nodded, smiling.

"That was very nice of you. I'm Eli, by the way." he shook his hand. He was real and he was right here, holding hands with him. Ok, this is happening!

"Nice to meet you. That was no problem really, if you ever have any trouble with them again just tell me" Steve blunted out nervously, scratching his neck. Eli smiled, picking up his books and leaving.

"Again, Steve?" the teacher asked, raising an eyebrow. "I'm starting to think you're not even trying. Go to detention!"

Steve sighs, walking with his head down in shame. But this time, when he enters the classroom he sees someone that make his eyes light up.

"Eli! Hi!" Steve sits on the table behind him, excited.

"Oh, hey Steve"

"What are you in here for?" he asks confused.

"I was breaking in. And you?" Eli says as if it's a normal occurrence.

"Woah what???"

"I was trying to study at the lab during recess."

"I didn't know that wasn't allowed"

"Well... I kinda was using their equipment to try and communicate with aliens... Which isn't allowed..." Eli says a little embarrassed.

"Oh" Steve laughs, finding the story very endearing. "So you like space, huh?"

"I do. Imagine if I got to do it. It would've been so cool!" he exclaims, and Steve has to hold back the urge to tell him about the parallel universe.

"It really would. Don't lose hope though" he winks at his direction.

Eli smiles and keeps working on his assignment.

"Y'know, I didn't expect you to be here. You're very... um... nerdy?" Steve admits after some minutes of silence.

"Oh so we're doing stereotypes? Alright, jock. Why are you here? Got into a fight?"

"What? No. I'm a nice person! I just didn't do my homework. Again."

"Because you didn't want to or...?" Eli asked confused, tilting his head. Steve had a genius idea. He felt like those cartoons when a little lamp lights up.

"I'm having a lot of trouble, actually. Are you any good with math?"

"Of course. Why?"

"What do you say you help me with homework and I help you by staying on look out when you're in the lab?"

Eli considered, as he heard the bell ring. He gathers his books and hands Steve a piece of paper before leaving.

"Sure. Text me later so we can talk about it"

"Sounds good" Steve smiled. If this went anything like he wanted to, he better start cleaning some space in his closet.

#hello! its me! again #just a silly little thing that came to me and i rolled with it lol #i kinda like it tho! enjoy!#steli #steve palchuk x eli pepperjack #creepslayerz #tales of arcadia #trollhunters #my writing

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theclockworkmonk · 3 years

Text

Out of the Mouths of Babes — Ch 6

AO3 | FFN

Previous chapter on Tumblr

Written for Hinny Ficfest 2021

Prompt: “Uncle Ron said something about Harry knocking Ginny up, but I don’t know what he means,” Teddy said.

Special thanks to @deadwoodpecker for beta reading this chapter

********

It was Molly’s turn to catch Arthur as he swayed on his feet and nearly fainted into her lap.

Hermione’s trembling hands were clapped firmly over her mouth, her eyes bulging to the size of saucers and darting around the room, unsure of who to start questioning, lecturing, or comforting first.

Ron was standing comfortably looking very pleased with himself, taking his turn to give Hermione his best “I told you so” look.

Fleur was silently beaming.

George’s face was turning red and his lips were pressed together so tightly they were turning white, he was trying so hard to keep his flippant comments to himself.

Percy had an intense, focused look on his face like he was trying to solve a maths problem or get a joke.

Bill and Charlie were glaring at Harry with a renewed quiet venom that was more intimidating than the unrestrained threats of a few minutes earlier.

But Harry wasn’t even close to caring, because his brain was too busy with listing to him all of the reasons why he was a terrible person and how he had ruined Ginny’s life and how he had no business being responsible for a tiny helpless human. With the deathly silence of the kitchen, he could perfectly hear his pulse pounding in his ears.

Ginny was still just staring at the blue potion with a completely blank expression. Finally, she was the one who broke the silence.

“...Huh.”

That sound was like a dam breaking, and the entire family erupted into a new flood of noise, all shouting over each other.

“Okay, okay, nobody panic!” Hermione shrieked, flapping her hands and clearly panicking, “We can handle this, I’ll help Ginny make a plan! I’ll start a baby binder!”

Molly darted across the kitchen and tackled her still-stunned daughter into a crushing hug.

“Remember Ginny dear, this is a good thing and we’re all happy for you, even though I’m so sorry I failed you as a mother,” she cried.

“By that she means you both are always accepted by this family and we’ll help any way we can,” said Arthur seriously.

“Yes, feel free to floo over if you ever start feeling sick, dear,” wept Molly, clasping onto Ginny’s hands for dear life, “and I know you starve yourself for your team, but you need to eat whatever you have a craving for as soon as you crave it, even if those trainers don’t like it. I’ll be happy to cook it for you. In fact, I’ll just start coming over every day to make sure you have everything.”

Behind her, Fleur was silently fist-pumping in victory at the new target for Molly Weasley’s doting.

“Not that anybody cares,” said Ron pointedly, staring up at the ceiling with his arms crossed, “But I’m still waiting for my apology.”

That was enough to shake Ginny out of her trance and she actually chuckled. “Ronald, it’s going to take a lot more than the immediate vindication of the wanker things you say for that to happen.”

Bill and Charlie’s faces had turned a shade of purple that reminded Harry entirely too much of Uncle Vernon.

“The rising star junior Auror can’t handle rudimentary contraception magic?” Charlie growled through clenched teeth.

Harry gulped loudly enough to be heard over the cacophony. “No! This potion batch is just a dud, we’re always safe!”

Ginny gasped and grabbed Harry by the sleeve. She pulled him close and whispered, as if there were a chance everyone wouldn’t hear. “Wait, Harry, you did remember to do the Charm...erm….that time, right?” She glanced sideways at Ron and Hermione. “That time...you know...at that thing? That thing three weeks ago?”

Harry’s insides felt like they had been frozen. Apparently the look on his face betrayed him, because Ginny looked to be going through the same revelation as him.

“I….I thought you had,” he mumbled weakly.

Ginny winced and closed her eyes. “Noooooooo,” she moaned, “Harry, we established this, the one who initiates it needs to do the Charm!”

“Exactly!” said Harry, “You were the one who grabbed me and dragged me to the bathroom!”

“Only because you hadn’t taken your hand off my thigh the entire bloody dinner!” said Ginny frantically, “What was I supposed to do, just keep eating cake?”

“Wait!” said Ron loudly, and Harry and Ginny froze like trapped rabbits.

Ron glared back and forth between the two of them, the gears in his head working. “Dinner? Cake? Three weeks?”

“Oh, you have got to be kidding me!” Hermione seethed dangerously. “Seriously? At our engagement party!?”

Harry shrank away from her like a child caught in the sweets jar. “Er….would you believe that we got caught up in the romance of the moment? You know, because you two are so in love, it’s inspiring?”

“Exactly!” said Ginny, “Really, you should take this as a compliment.”

Ron had his hands over his ears and his eyes clenched shut. “Welp. I can never use that bathroom again. We have to move flats. Better yet, let’s just burn down the building.”

“So what is the Harpies’ maternity plan?” Percy asked studiously, as if this were simply a bureaucratic issue, “how soon do you plan on going on leave? Assuming, of course, you...you know….intend to go through with it”

Tense silence fell, as the misunderstanding that caused all this chaos was suddenly relevant again. Every face was looking toward Harry and Ginny with baited breath.

Ginny swallowed and cleared her throat.

“That,” she said forcefully, crossing her arms, “is none of your business. None of this is any of your business. So if you’ll excuse us, the only people whose opinions matter right now will discuss this alone.”

Without waiting for a retort, Ginny grabbed Harry by the hand and led him up the stairs. After they entered Ginny’s old bedroom and Harry closed the door behind him, she paced back and forth several times before turning to face him.

“Did you put a ward on the door?” she asked.

“And several more on our way up the stairs,” answered Harry. “We should have a while before an Extendable Ear sneaks in here.”

“Good. Very good. Cool. Coolcoolcoolcoolcool.”

An uncomfortable silence fell over them, both hesitant to look the other in the eye. Harry wanted to hug her and start reassuring her, but he also didn’t want this conversation to start, because he wasn’t sure if he was strong enough to hear what he suspected Ginny would say.

Even though he was completely panicking and sure he would find a way to spectacularly mess up raising a child, there was no doubt in his mind about at least trying his best at it. But he knew how dedicated Ginny was to her career, and how difficult this could be for her. He was sure what she was going to say, but he wasn’t sure he could withstand hearing it.

Ginny was chewing her lip, but finally broke the silence. “Look, Harry….this is a lot to take in. Neither of us planned on this happening so soon, obviously. I understand if you want to focus on your job—”

“What?” Harry couldn’t help but laugh. “You’re a professional athlete who has another human growing inside you, and it’s my job we need to worry about?”

Ginny shrugged. “Well, I could keep playing for the next few months. The team healers put a ward around your abdomen for bludgers. I would have to take a break eventually, but I’m on contract now, so I’m secured in my roster spot while on maternity leave, and they always give players a chance to earn their starting spot back.”

“Oh,” said Harry, surprised. “Well that’s….that’s good. I thought it would be more cutthroat.”

“Well, the Harpies’ whole brand is having the very best female players in Britain,” said Ginny proudly, “and having a reputation for the best maternity plan in the league makes them pretty attractive to all their prospects. It’s hard to build a core team if you permanently lose a player every time someone gets pregnant.

“So…” she said assertively, looking him in the eye. “I feel like...we can do this. I want to keep this baby. But ultimately I feel like it’s both of our decisions. I’ll understand no matter how you feel. So….what are you thinking?”

Harry felt like he was in a tug of war, between exploding from happiness or imploding from terrifying nerves. Dementors, dragons, Death Eaters, nothing was as scary as this, but he also didn’t have to think about his answer, even for a second.

His hand drifted into his pocket and he toyed with what was inside. This wasn’t how he imagined doing this, but she asked him what he was thinking, and this night had already flipped all their plans upside-down, what was a bit more?

Harry focused on Ginny’s brown eyes, still earnestly waiting for his answer, and he found the courage he always found there.

“Here’s what I’m thinking,” he said bracingly.

He dropped down to one knee.

Ginny made a high-pitched squeak and her eyes widened in shock. Harry smiled at himself, pleased that he could still catch her completely off-guard.

“I wasn’t planning on doing this soon. I was afraid you would think I was being pushy. Was going to wait a few years. Or maybe a few months. Okay, I was probably close to cracking already. And in the meantime, it still felt good to have this on me, as a good luck charm I suppose.”

He reached into his pocket and pulled out the small black box he had bought weeks earlier.

“Harry….” Ginny whispered, her eyes welling with tears.

“Ginny,” Harry answered. He opened the box to reveal the ring. “Will you mar—guh!”

He was cut off by a crazed redhead tackling him to the ground, grabbing his face and kissing him hard enough to knock the wind out of him. Harry’s head was spinning, but he reluctantly pushed her back.

“Gin — Gin!” he grunted between kisses. Finally, Ginny pulled back, frowning at him.

“There’s kind of a part you forgot?” Harry said pointedly, raising his eyebrows.

Ginny looked lost for a moment, then rolled her eyes. “Oh, yeah. Yes. Obviously yes, you idiot.”

She kissed him again, and he lost track of time. Eventually, his back started to get sore on the wood floor, and he pushed himself up and pulled them both to their feet.

“We can finish our own celebration later,” said Harry, smiling so wide his face was sore, “but we should probably put your family’s worries to rest. And I can’t wait to show the world your hand with this on it.” He slid the ring onto her finger, and Ginny bounced on her feet like she was eleven years old again, practicing signing the name “Ginny Potter” in a diary.

Then, her smile slipped and she groaned loudly. “Ugh, this will make my mum even more of a nightmare now. I thought she was bad in the lead-up to Bill’s wedding, she’ll be even worse since she has to be the mother to both of us.”

“Well, Bill’s wedding was nice, wasn’t it?” said Harry diplomatically.

“I mean, I guess,” Ginny shrugged, “but not nearly nice enough to be worth all the hassle. The months of my mother stressing over everything and making sure I know my part. And I was just a bridesmaid! Being the center of attention of a hundred people while wearing a cumbersome dress might be Fleur’s dream, but it sounds like the worst day of my life.”

She wrapped her arms around Harry’s waist and pulled him close. “I just care if I’m the center of your attention.”

Harry smiled even wider. “Well don’t worry, you could be wearing a burlap sack and I still won’t be able to take my eyes off you.”

“So you don’t mind backing me up when Mum breaks out the bridal magazines?” Ginny asked pleadingly. “I was never one of those girls that fantasize about an extravagant wedding; in fact, the smaller the better. We’ve never really talked about it, but I know you, so I assume you would be okay with that?”

Harry laughed loudly. “Are you kidding? Yes, absolutely. You know I’m not exactly a social butterfly. As far as I’m concerned, we could jusy floo over to the Ministry and take care of it right now.”

They both erupted into a fresh round of laughter, holding each other and clutching their sides at how funny and ridiculous the idea was.

Then, their eyes met, and their laughter faltered, growing more and more quiet until tense silence descended on the room. Their smiles dropped, and their suddenly serious eyes held a wordless conversation.

Finally, both their mouths crept back up into wide smiles, this time being full of mischief.

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generallypo · 4 years

Photo

in all sincerity, kim dokja makes me happy and he deserves to be so too :^(

incoherent yelling and sobbing under the cut. these fEELINGS will not be contained aaauuunnghhh.

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anyway i binge-read all 500+ chapters of ORV this week and i honest to god feel bad for this -- completely! fictional! aghhhh -- guy. in case you haven’t figured it out, the following is some spoilerly shit

i went in expecting a fun, brainless power trip fantasy for dudes with an isekai addiction. instead, it turns out ORV is actually a gigantic, self-deprecating prank on the entire genre itself. kdj plays more into the sad -- if high-functioning-- clown trope than the sexy, edgy, chuuni bastard type i was prepared to laugh at. there were -- gasp! -- female characters with personalities! parents (aka ADULTS who act like ADULTS) who actually survive and feature prominently! adorable children! a real sexy, edgy bastard! a power trio with amazing fashion! sexual tension and bickering! friendship! life and death bonding!

*breathes in deeply* fouND FAMILYYYYYYY.

like, yeah, the plot around the first few arcs seems a little aimless, but the buildup is worth. the world-building is pretty decent. there’s discernible effort put into the fight scenes, and i can appreciate that. but -- but! what i stayed for were the characters -- namely, the fantastic OT3 of KDJ, HSY, and YJH -- who come together despite their initial rivalries and end up saving each other’s asses, like, every other day. granted, the other characters don’t get as much focus, and they do fall into certain character tropes..

but a trope done well is nothing i would gripe about. every significant character in ORV has a coherent, and more importantly, respectful take on their respective trope. maybe it’s because sing-shong is actually a married couple, but all the interactions between even minor characters are a convincing blend of awkward rambling, suggestive humor, sharp remarks, and casual banter. in other words, this cast of mostly working adults (plus a teen and two kids) talks like working adults. the relationships built throughout the story are, frankly, some of most realistic of its genre. sing-shong has managed to craft a dynamic that undoubtedly brims with fluffy fondness all around, but also drips with sarcastic tension, with unspoken urgency, with a wariness that softens into sincerity over the course of many, many chapters. it’s the kind of progression that makes even stock characters read like more than just the 2-bit villain or comrade or love interest. here, we have relationships both straightforward and not, strained or otherwise, romantically-oriented as well as decidedly the opposite -- and then numerous others scattered along the spectrum with the freedom to shift either way.

it’s also an interesting point of note that our MC kdj actually does not end up with a stated romantic partner, much less a conventional heteroromantic harem. he gets teased about that fact from time to time, but it’s with less of the sleazy shonen locker room humor one would expect and more of the good-natured ribbing you’d find among friends or that one especially nosy auntie at the yearly family reunion. kdj is a grown ass man. in the background, i applaud his maturity, and he handles all the prodding like a champ.

so instead of finding and fulfilling his horny, he builds himself a wealth of loving family. yeah, there are beautiful men and women around him. yeah, they unequivocally adore him. but they’re also adults, and they have priorities, too -- which are not so much finding a way to bang kdj’s brains out and more so simply keeping the damn guy alive. this is truly not ‘oblivious mc with his thirsty, sex kitten harem’. it just so happens that a guy proves himself to be unflinchingly gentle and capable in an apocalyptic setting despite his broken self-esteem, and lots of people find that attractive, romantically and platonically.

it.. kinda makes sense? he’s a hard worker, thoughtful, and good with kids. kdj is the kind of guy you know would make a reliable partner, and anybody with eyes can plainly see and appreciate that.

and it’s not that our MC’s a total brick wall. in fact, it’s likely the opposite, and he’s just too darned repressed to admit it. from what has been implied, kdj does indeed recognize and accept love, or at least a primitive concept of it. i like to imagine that the kind of love that he ends up seeking out simply manifests itself more easily as acceptance and safety, as warmth and a home of people to return to every day. even better, the people who surround him know this, and they give him exactly that. it’s refreshing, and honestly, really sweet.

(as a side note, i really, really do appreciate the cosmic bi energy radiating off of kdj, who canonically earns the title of being loved by all and is all but in name married to yjh and hsy. he also respects women and small children and honestly anyone who isn’t total scum to him or his family. i respect that.)

but the happy stuff aside, you know it it just ain’t ORV without the generous screaming dollop of angst. admittedly, there’s self-sacrifice, injury, lonesome wandering, more sacrifice, some epic fighting, reunion and confrontation. all of it is a lot to digest, sure, but never does it feel entirely hopeless, or truly, truly heart-clenching. ORV, up until the final act, is a mostly light read. you relax in your chair, thinking that nothing beyond this point can disturb you.

yeah fucking right.

------

and then the beginning of the end arrives. when the squad finally break through to their ‘ending’, the scene that kind of breaks me is the reveal of the Most Ancient Dream. it ties so much thematically into the little tidbits that we get of kdj’s past, and it though it feels like almost a joke that the source of the goddamn apocalypse is a kid with bruises smeared across his skinny ass body -- it’s such a pathetic picture that it’s kinda poetic, actually. you’re left mystified but somewhat convinced, like a math problem explained halfway through. this.. child.. is a villain somehow, isn’t he?

and then 999th turn uriel speaks up, and she. just. hugs him.

[[You are this universe’s most powerless existence, aren’t you.]]

that. that gets me. kdj’s reaction immediately upon this revelation? absolute murder. seeing him essentially self-destruct upon realizing that all these people he’s surrounded himself with -- some who continuously proclaim their loyalty and affection for him throughout their journey, some who suffered eons of war and loss and trauma because of his existence -- not only forgive his younger self but smother him with unconditional acceptance and love is stifling, is too vulnerable and exposed and he simply can’t cope -- it’s so telling of his true mentality, of his crippling insecurity and crumpled sense of self-worth. kim dokja is a liar, through and through, so much that he fails, or perhaps refuses, to comprehend the veracity of others’ kindness and love towards himself.

by some miracle, the events at the end of the world somehow resolve.. or so it seems. there is a departing train, a liberated team of ex-gods, and a child rousing from his slumber. in the aftermath, i am left shaking. somehow, despite the ending having been (happily?) reached, there’s still another chapter ahead. what is this witchcraft?

------

and then ah, yes -- the epilogue arc. i teetered on the edge of being critical for a little bit there -- is that display of deus ex machina, of sad, self-sacrificing nobility a bit too egregious to be acceptable? is this some wild last let-me-yank-this-outta-my-ass plot twist to drag out the chapter count? i sincerely thought that the arc before it would have been the finale. i was wrong. thank god.

anyways, as an answer to the above: no, and no. i stake my firm claim on the belief that the epilogue arc was meticulously planned out well in advance of its release, confusing and time-warpy as it is. i liked it. tremendously. even if it entirely invalidates all of kdj’s supposed development (”haha lol yeah sure i won’t sacrifice myself or anything anymore guys don’t worry about me” -- KDJ, at some point because he’s a lying rat bastard). actually, our beloved MC disappears for a large chunk of this arc, and i think it’s great. in his absence, the other characters not only go absolutely fucking nuts, but they have to figure out this new problem on their own, even if the lure of peaceful complacency in the newly saved Korea might convince them otherwise.

and then the whole time paradox thing comes around. yjh goes to space, hsy saves the only life she can, and kdj grows up. the crew waits, holding onto their hope even if it bleeds them dry. sing-shong does a damn good job of illustrating their fraying calm, their lurking madness, the unseen but pervasive depression that seeps in from kdj’s absence. the kids lose their father, lhs and jhw lose their reliable leader figure, ysa loses a best friend and confidant, lsk -- as distant as she pretends to be from her son -- loses her only child. and then there’s hsy and yjh , who are essentially bereft of the other half of their existences. their pain is palpable, is grounded in the hopeless, gnawing frustration of an utterly meaningless victory. emotionally, ORV hits all the right -- if agonizing -- beats.

however, a story can’t sustain itself just through its pathos. i’m happy to say that ORV doesn’t drop the ball after the first milestone, and after all the hurt, the characters do leap straight back into action. even better, the plot holes actually do get patches, and the poetic cycle of writer, protagonist, and reader comes full circle by making use of all those supposedly throwaway characters from the myriad world lines.

at the end of the road, there is a distinct sense of unity, of a delicate but undeniable cohesion to the world lines and their origins. sing-shong lets us guess a little here at the finish, but there’s just enough information to feel hopeful. maybe there never had been a definite start -- or finish -- to the story of kdj company, and... that’s okay. everybody ends up where they were meant to be, where they fought and struggled to reach. it’s.. almost like a happily ever after, if we’re allowed to dream of that.

------

now, i realize, this was all an orchestrated maneuver.

i’ll take it.

to me, all of this work sounds like someone put some serious thought into this behemoth of a plot. it cements the entire original premise of the story. it suggests -- but never explicitly confirms! -- the possibility that breaking free of the cycle is possible through the exact same system that sustains it. it’s terribly interesting -- and inspirational! with all the dramatic revelations and life-threatening scenarios and the cast’s resigned acceptance of them that essentially make up ORV’s entire mood, there’s still that last hint of rebellious and righteous anger that lights up the whole damn nebula. it’s like the kdj company blasting away at the heavens just to yell into the nether: we’re not looking for the happy end, but the free one. stay alive.

it’s subtle, and yet it’s such an emotional gut punch. i came away with the most ruinous, frustrating, bittersweet sense of longing in ages. i pined. for these fictional darlings. god, i am weak.

so. yeah. ORV is pretty good. flawed, but ambitious and impressively thought out. i’m stoked that the webtoon is making pretty good progress, even if it’ll take an eternity and a half to meet that monstrous chapter count. i’m still gonna follow it. hell yeah.

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(by the way the idea that secretive plotter and co are literally gonna take care of and raise baby kdj and spoil him and be the best friggin family a kid could ever want does things to me. protect him. he’s suffered too much. let at least one worldline’s version of him know happiness. and actually, aLL OF THEM DESERVE DOMESTIC BLISS TOGETHER IN A BIG OL MANSION WITH SUN AND FRESH AIR AND TENDER FAMILY MOMENTS UGH)

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and there you have it, folks. you made it to the end. in the far, far distance, i’m cheering you on and crying my eyes out in gratitude. thanks for tuning in!

#omniscient reader #orv #omniscient reader's viewpoint #kim dokja #fanart #kdj happiness rights!#protect him!#let! him! have his big house! with everyone! he loves!#please!#long ass emotional screeching #look i can't do him justice with drawing but hell can i yell out my love for him :'^DD

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