#and sound like they feel guilty for enjoying her character and have to beg other people to give her a chance

[kaltacore]

i would really like to see people appreciate beau's growth and character arc more without trying to convince newcomers that "she'll get better eventually just you wait" implying she was such an unbearable character you have to make yourself sit through her scenes. i assure you, she wasn't

#you may like or dislike any character for whatever reason mind you! i'm not arguing with that! #but her flaws are so blown out of proportion in fandom while other characters' flaws aren't treated this way at all #and i'm yet to see someone saying that caleb gets better later on. or that veth does. maybe this is also a thing i don't know #but it surely doesn't happen under all relatively popular content centered around them #also beau surely wasn't the only one guilty of being rude and picking fights at the beginning of the campaign. this is just. not true. #the way she's usually referred to as the least cooperative member of m9 #and she wasn't the one who got threatened with a sword for putting the whole party's lives in danger for her own interests. is interesting #this just. makes me sad. i really don't get why people who like her adopt that misconception invented by people who openly disliked her #and sound like they feel guilty for enjoying her character and have to beg other people to give her a chance #i got into m9 with little to none exposure to fandom opinions and honestly. it was really surprising to find out she upsets people that muc #critical role #beauregard lionett #the mighty nein

[bestaez]

Strangers (Chapter Nine)

Strangers from Hell AU

Series Masterlist

pairing: ot7 x reader

genre: yandere, horror/thriller

word count: 6k

warnings (lmk if i missed anything!): unreliable narrator, murder, mature themes, minor character death, obsessive/possessive behavior, emotional manipulation, stalking, bullying, violence, blood and injuries, mc has some self-deprecating thoughts, mc is lowkey in denial.

When Nayeon offered to book you a hotel room, you weren’t expecting her to book such a lavish place. You tried to convince her to pick a cheaper motel you wouldn't feel so guilty staying in but she wouldn’t allow it, insisting that you let her take care of you. It wasn’t like she didn’t have the money - her position paid quite a generous salary. But that wasn’t the point. She had already done so much for you and you just felt like you didn’t deserve any of it. She had waved off all your attempts, fixing you with an almost exasperated look that finally made you shut up.

It reminded me of the first night you met Nayeon, in the bathroom of one of the only college parties you had ever attended. Before you had met Jihoon, there was another guy from one of your classes that you had gotten close to. You had bonded over late night studying in the library and last-minute racing to the cafeteria before it closed. Despite your best efforts, you fell for him. When he invited you to his friend’s kickback, you were excited to spend more time with him. That was until he blew you off to have sex in his car with some random girl. The two of you weren’t exclusive by any means, but you couldn’t help but be jaded over it.

Even back then, you knew you were probably being silly for feeling jealous. But you were also just hurt that he had left you alone at a house party where you didn’t know anyone. When turning to drinking only resulted in you being even more intoxicated and sad, you had ventured off to the bathroom to let your feelings out. And that was how Nayeon had found you, sitting on the closed toilet seat with your head in your hands and tears streaming down your cheeks. 

“I can promise you he isn’t worth your tears,” She had stated, giving you a look in the mirror as she checked her makeup. When you explained your pathetic situation, she only scoffed in disbelief. She grabbed your hand, pulling you up from your seat and meeting your gaze fiercely. “I’m Nayeon. See, now you know one other person here.”

Nayeon had cheered you up with words of affirmations and fixed your makeup a bit. After that, she held your hand and walked you back down to where the party was. She introduced you to her friend group, which ironically included Jihoon. The two of them took you under their wing and became your closest friends throughout their college years. And now, the two of them here taking care of you in your adult years was very funny but almost meant to be.

Nayeon and Jihoon had initially planned to leave so that you could have some space but you begged them to stay. You didn’t trust your mind enough to be alone with your thoughts in a new place. Once they saw the teary look in your eyes, it wasn’t even a question. You ended up falling asleep cuddled up next to Jihoon with Nayeon sleeping in the spare bed, her back facing you. This sleepover arrangement was so strange but you allowed yourself to enjoy the familiar company for one night.

The next morning, the two of them had left in order to grab a change of clothes - both promising to return as soon as they could. You knew it was only reasonable for them to leave eventually but you couldn’t help the heavy feeling in your chest. It had been so cozy there in your little bubble.

You don’t know how long you stayed in bed like that, staring at the wall deep in thought. The sound of your phone buzzing next to you broke you out of your daze, glancing at the screen to see an incoming call from your mom. Your heart skipped a beat, paranoid thoughts that she might know what happened sneaking in. Did Jihoon or Nayeon tell her?

Your hands shook as you brought the phone to your ear, “Mom?”

“Hi honey! I was just calling to check in,” Her comforting voice came through the speaker, causing your racing heart to slow just a bit. “How are you doing?”

“I’m fine,” You paused, trying to keep the confusion lacing your tone. “How are you?”

“Great! I wanted to thank you for sending that check.” You froze in your spot on the bed, eyes staring unblinking as she spoke. “I didn’t realize you were going to send so much. You have no idea what this will do for us.”

Whatever else she said after that went unheard by you, your mind trying to make sense of what she said. You never sent her any check. At least, you had no memory of doing so. She had only called you the other day so you hadn’t had the time to. And at this point, you weren’t sure you would even have the means to do so anymore. You didn’t know if you should tell her the truth so you just remained quiet, trying to focus on what she was saying. She was updating you on your brother’s condition, which as it seemed was improving. 

“Oh- your brother’s awake now. I’ll put him on.”

You waited and then your brother’s voice came on the line, “YN?”

“Minjun?” You hadn’t expected the tears that came flooding in at the sound of your baby brother’s voice. It was a much-needed comfort. “How are you?”

“I’m doing okay. Mom said you helped pay for my procedure. Thank you so much, sissy.”

You choked a little, not knowing if you should take credit for something you didn’t do but ultimately deciding not to let them stress over it either. “Of course, Junie. I hope you’re feeling better now.”

“Yes, I feel a lot better.” He answered, sounding strong and hopeful. “Are you liking it out there in the city? Is your job pretty cool?”

“It’s not bad and, uh, yeah my job is pretty cool.” You feel so lame lying to your brother like this but it’s not like you could tell him the truth. You didn’t know how you were even going to tell your mother.

You listened to your brother chat for a little while longer. He told you funny stories about the different roommates he had encountered during his trips to the hospital. You half-listened, half-marveled at how grown up he sounded. You couldn’t wrap your mind around it. You hadn’t left home that long ago so why did they feel so far away?

After the call ended, all you could do was stare at the phone in confusion. Was it possible you sent your mother money and completely forgot about it? No, there was so way. You weren’t that out of it. So, then who did? Your first thought was maybe Jihoon or Nayeon because they had always loved your mom when they came to visit with you during your school breaks. They claimed your mom made the best naengmyeon and always begged her to make it for them. But, you don’t remember ever telling them about your family’s money problem.

Before you could stress yourself out even more, there was a knock at the door. You got up slowly, light footsteps making your way to the door as you stared at it cautiously. For some reason, you were on edge thinking about who it could be. Jihoon and Nayeon never said when they would come back, just that it would be a little while.

Just as you were leaning up to check the peephole, a deep voice sounded behind the door. “It’s me, YN.”

You breathed a sigh of relief, unlocking it to see your boyfriend’s face waiting patiently behind it. He raised his eyebrows at you playfully, waiting for you to step aside to let him in. Once you were both inside and the door was shut behind you, you felt much calmer and safer.

Jihoon wasted no time making himself at home, settling in on the foot of the bed with a bag by his feet. You took a seat next to him, muscles tense as you tried to appear relaxed next to him. But of course, he knew you too well and saw right through your act.

“Calm down, YN.” Jihoon’s shoulder bumped yours lightly. “You look so tense.”

“Sorry.” You mumbled, falling backwards on the bed in a heap. “I don’t know why I just feel so paranoid.”

“Why? You know you’re safe here, right?” He turned to look at you fully, concern etched into his expression.

“Yes. That’s the problem, I’m too scared to leave.” You explained, biting your lip thoughtfully.

Jihoon sighed, leaning back he turned to give you a long look. He looked deep in thought about something, opening his mouth a few times before finally settling with, “Look-”

Another knock at the door interrupted him. He paused, looking at you before getting up to check the peephole. You already knew who it was by the way his shoulders sagged knowingly, going to unlock the door and let her in.

Nayeon came in, bright-eyed and rosy cheeked. She, too, had a bag with her that she dropped by your feet unceremoniously. She plopped down next to you on the bed, throwing an arm over your shoulder and squeezing you affectionately. “How’s my dongsaeng?

“Better, I think.” You answered as honestly as you could, palms rubbing the fabric of your pants idly. “I spoke to my mom earlier.”

“Yeah? Did you tell her what happened?” Jihoon asked curiously as he perched himself on the desk before you.

“No, definitely not. I don’t want to freak her out,” You shake your head, laughing humorlessly. “She’s been stressed enough these days. Actually, come to think of it, I know this sounds crazy but did either of you send her money recently?”

They both shook their heads at you curiously, frowns etched on their faces.

“It’s so weird. She thanked me for sending her a check but I don’t recall ever sending her one. She had asked me for one and I had been planning to, but I never got around to doing it.”

“Is it possible you did but just forgot?” Nayeon’s tone was light as she regarded you carefully.

“I don’t know.”

The three of you were silent after that, thoughts lingering over your heads that no one dared to speak out loud. You knew they were probably surveying your emotions, not wanting to say something that could possibly upset you. The fact that even Nayeon, your most outspoken friend, was quiet said something. You knew how this all must look and it all made you feel so helpless.

*****

It took some convincing but the two of them managed to get you out of the hotel room, insisting that it was important you didn’t grow dependent on staying inside. They also claimed they were starving and didn’t want to spend money on the expensive hotel room food, which you couldn’t argue with.

The walk to the restaurant wasn’t long and once inside, you found it was actually quite small and cozy. The three of you found a booth in the back, Jihoon pausing to let you slide in first as he came in next to you. Your mind was so jumbled you couldn’t even decipher the words on the menu, too distracted by all the other customers in the store. It wasn’t even that busy but every noise put you on edge. 

Jihoon had ordered something simple for you, sensing how difficult you were finding it to pick something to eat. You leaned into his shoulder and smiled thankfully, too absorbed in your boyfriend’s thoughtful actions to notice the jealous gaze on you both.

“So, YN,” Your eyes rose to find Nayeon staring at you with a curious look on her face, eyebrows raised. “What’s your plan?”

“I’m not sure, to be honest.” You threaded your fingers together, gaze averting to the tabletop nervously. “Have you heard anything?”

“Well, if you’re asking about your job, I don’t even know what to say. It doesn’t sound good, that’s for sure.” You nodded with a sigh, expecting that much. “But I haven’t heard anything about if she’s gonna press charges. Maybe if you apologized...”

“I don’t know if I can face her again.” Your hands trembled as you placed them on the table before you. Memories of your court case flooded back in and sent a cold shock to your system, having to deal with that girl and her family’s death glares was something you never wanted to experience again. “God, I’m such a mess.”

“We’ll help you get through this.” Jihoon placed his hand onto yours comfortingly, looking down at you with a soft smile on his face. The two of you held your gazes for a moment, feeling connected for the first time in a long time.

You didn’t notice the way Nayeon eyed your joined hands silently for a moment before she, too, placed her hand on yours, causing you both to look back at her. “Yes, we will.”

You found that despite life driving you apart in recent months, spending time in the presence of your two closest companions was much needed. Even if they hadn’t always been there for you before, they had shown up now without you even asking. You felt yourself relaxing into the warm bubble around them, almost forgetting how stressful your life had been up until now.

You open your mouth to thank them, freezing when your eyes fall on a figure in all-black entering the restaurant. You blink in shock, trying to see if it’s really him or just a hallucination. You wouldn’t be surprised if you were seeing things at this point but when the other two look at the entrance curiously, you know it’s real. You can’t explain the cold feeling that blooms in your chest at the sight of him. There’s just something about his presence that sets you off.

“Who is that, YN?” You can’t even respond, frozen in fear as he spots you, turning to approach the table.

“Hey stranger.” You can only gawk as Jihoon and Nayeon give you a questioning look. The newcomer appears unbothered by all the attention as he turns to look at Jihoon. “You must be the boyfriend.”

“And you are?” Jihoon raises an unimpressed eyebrow, trying to appear unfazed by the tense energy.

“Sorry, I’m being rude.” He chuckles, holding his hand out in introduction. “I’m Namjoon, YN’s roommate.”

The two of them shake hands, Namjoon looking almost too eager while Jihoon seemed apprehensive, sizing the former up where he stood. You risk a glance at Nayeon, who was too busy studying Namjoon curiously. You could tell she thought he was attractive with the way her eyes were raking up and down his form, unable to look away.

“Well, we were kind of in the middle of something-” Jihoon pulls his hand away finally, shaking his arm uncomfortably.

“Why don’t you join us?” Nayeon’s invitation shocks you all, but Namjoon eats it up as he slid in next to her with a grin. You are surprised to see her flip her hair to one side as she leans forward in her seat, gaze falling to her blouse that seemed to have more obvious cleavage than before. Had she unbuttoned her blouse that quickly?

“I’m Nayeon,” She clears her throat, bringing your roommate’s attention to her finally. He blinks as if just now taking her in. “I’m YN’s best friend.”

“Oh really?” Namjoon responds coolly, leaning back. “YN never mentioned a best friend.”

“Well that’s surprising because I’m the reason she’s here. I got her a job at my company. Well, what was her job.” Nayeon declares matter-of-factly, ignoring the deadpanned look Jihoon gives her. “I’m actually the chief-”

“Ah, that must be why you’re so full of yourself.” Your eyes widen at Namjoon’s bluntness, Jihoon snorting next to you.

“Excuse me?” Her eyebrows furrowed in confusion. Clearly, Nayeon was used to people praising her instead of judging her.

“You think you’re better than her because you’re some executive. If you’re in such a good position, why couldn’t you get her a real job instead of a stupid internship?” The tension was thick as you and Jihoon stared back and forth at the two bickering on the other side of the table. You felt like you weren’t even here, unable to believe any of this was happening. “And then you have the nerve to take all the credit for YN getting this position as if her own merit didn’t have anything to do with it. YN is a good person and you only put her down. You don’t deserve her.”

“How are you going to sit here and act like you know her in front of the two people who care about her the most?” Nayeon spits, rage filling her eyes. “She’s been my best friend for years-”

“You’re disgusting. Pretending like you care about her when you’re too busy fucking her boyfriend to answer her calls.”

At first, it was like you didn’t even hear it. It felt like you were in a dream and couldn’t get your ears to work or mouth to speak. Only when you saw Nayeon’s mouth open and close, her eyes blinking rapidly and avoiding making contact with your own did you fully register it. You looked at Jihoon, who seemed to be breaking out of his stupor as he reached across the table and grabbed Namjoon’s collar.

“Who the fuck do you think you are to say something like that?!” You don’t think you’ve ever seen your boyfriend get this angry. You could only stare in awe, meanwhile no one seemed to be brave enough to spare a look at you.

“Look at this fucking guy,” Namjoon laughed darkly, unbothered by the tight grip on his shirt. “Who are you acting all tough for, huh? Your girlfriend or your sidepiece?”

At that, Jihoon ripped Namjoon up out of his seat as they both stood and moved out into the aisle. More customers had arrived during your time here and the small crowd was watching the altercation. Somehow, you were too distracted to be embarrassed by all the attention.

“YN,” Nayeon reaches across the table to hold your arm tightly, “You know he’s lying, right? I don’t know where he got that from.”

You didn’t respond, wrenching yourself out of her grasp and finally getting out of your seat. Namjoon and Jihoon paused their staredown when you breezed past them, heading for the restaurant doors. You didn’t know what to think but you needed some air.

You had a few seconds to yourself as you stood outside the restaurant, the sky dark around you as night had fallen. There weren’t too many people in the street so at least it was peaceful for a moment. The sound of the doors flying open behind you popped that bubble.

“YN, I-”

“Is it true?” You didn’t turn around to look at Jihoon, unable to look at his face when he answered. But when he didn’t respond, you finally looked back. He could only stare at you sadly, and for a moment you thought you might have seen his eyes getting glossy behind his glasses before you rationalized it was probably just the glare from the streetlights. 

You looked at Nayeon, who stood a few feet away. She met your gaze head-on, trying to appear strong but you could tell from the way she shuffled her feet that she was nervous. There weren't many things that made your best friend uncomfortable but you knew a guilty look when you saw one.

“How could you?” Many emotions crossed her face - denial, surprise, sadness until she eventually settled with a mask of indifference.

“What do you want me to say? It’s not like you two were in the best of places. He was bored, I was lonely.” She shrugged, crossing her arms over her chest. “C’mon, we’re all adults here. Shit happens. I’m sorry.”

That last part felt like an afterthought and you knew she didn’t really mean it. You stared at your oldest friend with this new-found light and it was like suddenly, all her flaws were visible. She truly was a stone-cold bitch and you felt foolish for taking this long to realize it. Perhaps you were too close to her before to truly see it.

“It must be so lonely surrounding yourself with such narcissistic people,” Namjoon’s voice caught you off guard from where she stood a few feet away, making you tense up on the spot. “Especially in a scary new place like this. But, you know you’re not alone, YN. You always have us.”

“Oh my god,” Nayeon burst out laughing, covering her mouth. “Do you hear yourself? Fucking weirdo.”

“How the fuck did you even know, huh? Are you some kind of stalker?” Jihoon finds his voice as rage once again consumes him, turning to Namjoon as he steps closer.

“I’m just someone who cares a lot for YN, clearly more than you both do.” Namjoon answers simply, as if his revelations on your relationship are easy information for anyone to find. It was happening in your own life and you couldn’t even see it.

“Whatever. YN, I know you probably don’t want to hear it from me but if I were you, I’d get a restraining order against this guy’s ass.” You don’t look at her as Nayeon says her piece before turning to leave, walking further away down the sidewalk.

It’s silent for a while after that. You can’t get yourself to move your feet, staring at the ground as if deep in thought but nothing really sticking. You can feel the burning gazes of both men on you but you’re too zoned out to care.

“YN, let me take you back to the hotel at least.” Jihoon softly calls out to you, stepping closer. It isn’t until you feel his hand on you that you finally snap. “Honey-”

“Don’t call me that.” You spit, throwing your fists against his chest angrily. “Don’t touch me. Just.. fuck off!” 

Jihoon could only stand there and take it as you beat against him senselessly, allowing you to let your frustrations out on him. It wasn’t until you felt your energy start to lessen and tears fill your eyes that you finally gave him a good shove, turning on your heel to get away from him.

The sound of footsteps behind you caused you to hasten your steps, not wanting to deal with another confrontation and just wanting to be alone. When you felt a hand on your shoulder, you reeled back in anger only to see it was Namjoon following you.

“Namjoon, w-what?” You breathed, too absorbed in the drama of your boyfriend cheating on you to think about his part in all this. “Why are you here?”

“Are you okay?” He seemed concerned as he closed the gap between your bodies, peering down at you.

“How did you know about them? Were you following us?” All those times you had been out somewhere and thought you saw someone in the corner of your eye or heard something behind you - had it been him all along? Or any of your other roommates? Were they all in on this?

“Remember when I said your boyfriend didn’t deserve you? I knew something was off that night when he didn’t answer your calls.” Namjoon answers truthfully, looking into your eyes.

“Look, I appreciate the concern but can you just back off? It’s starting to creep me out.” You shuffled from one foot to another, looking away from him in discomfort.

“I can’t.” 

You looked back up at him, trying to conceal your gasp at his blatant disregard for your wishes. He reaches out to brush some of your hair away from your face as he sighs thoughtfully. A tense silence follows as you freeze where you stand, his words and actions making you stare at him in confusion. As much as his recent behavior had thrown you off guard, nothing could prepare you for what came out his mouth next. 

“I don’t know if I ever told you this before but once I find my target, I never let them go.” Your heart stutters in your chest as his thumb brushes across your cheek, dark eyes tracking the action casually. 

“Your target? What the fuck is wrong with you?” You pushed his hand away from your face, stepping back from him to create some distance. “You know what, I don’t care. Just stay the fuck away from me before I call the police.”

You turn your back on him as you move further down the street, which might not have been the smartest move around a seemingly dangerous person but you were eager to get out of his presence. Much to your surprise, he doesn’t follow you - or at least, you don’t hear him behind you at all. You’re almost too scared to check.

“YN.” Namjoon’s voice makes you jump, legs trembling as you turn slightly to look back at him standing in the exact spot you left him in. “I promise I’ll show you how much I care for you.”

You don’t respond, hurrying up the hill in an attempt to get to safety. He didn’t seem like he was planning on following you but that doesn’t stop you from turning around every few steps to ensure there is no one there, each time only finding the empty street. You do this the entire way until you find yourself at the hotel, so relieved to be back you could cry.

And when you finally flop down in your bed, that’s exactly what you do.

*****

An incessant buzzing sound slowly woke you from your slumber, lifting your head to blink blearily around the room in confusion. Your head was in such a fog you couldn’t remember where you were for a second. The only thing your mind could focus on was the source of the noise, pulling your phone from the nightstand and tapping at it to get it to shut up.

Once silenced, you laid your head back on the pillow in hopes to pick back up where you left off. Before you could even get close, the buzzing started up again much to your annoyance. You huffed, picking the phone back up and swiping to answer it.

“What-” Your tone is harsh, ready to lash out on your bitch of a best friend. As if sleeping with your boyfriend wasn’t enough, now she has to blow up your phone in a time like this.

“Where are you?” At Nayeon’s frantic tone, you felt yourself waking up a bit more.

“Why are you calling me?” You didn’t have time for this, moving to end the call and finally block her for good when her rushed voice stopped you.

“YN, this is serious. Tell me where you are.”

“I’m back at the hotel room,” Confused, you find yourself sitting up in the bed and running a hand through your hair. “Why?”

“Okay, stay there. I’m on my way.” She spoke quickly, the sound of metal jingling around in the background followed by a door slamming. It sounded like she was driving, which you knew was something she hated doing. This must be serious.

“Wait, what’s going on? I don’t want to see you-” You began, feeling your stomach turn at the thought of having to face your homewrecker of a friend right now. 

“Jiwan is dead.”

You don’t know how much time had passed from the moment the call ended to when Nayeon arrived at the hotel, the sound of loud knocking waking you up out of the daze you had been in. Standing up on wobbly legs, it felt as if you were floating as you made your way over to the door. The tremor in your hands made it a little difficult to unlatch the door but once it was open, your old friend breezed her way in.

You followed behind her slowly, feeling out of place despite it being your own room. Eventually, you found yourself getting back into your spot on the bed by the pillows. Being in a safe, comfortable position settled you a bit. Nayeon stood tense in front of the bed, arms crossed and her eyes looking anywhere but at you. In the back of your mind, you found her sudden change in character to be a bit ironic.

“W-what happened?” Your voice sounded far away, like it wasn’t connected to you at all. She finally looked up, her eyes meeting yours in a way that made your heart skip a beat.

“She was found dead in her apartment this morning. Someone killed her.” She answered quickly, sounding like her own mind was trying to wrap around it.

At that moment, it was like time stopped. There was no sound, not even Jiwan’s voice or your own breathing. The blood was rushing in your ears, throbbing almost painfully. You weren’t sure if you could actually hear your own heartbeat or if it was just the feeling of it pounding in your chest.

“YN?” You looked up to see her looking at you with a frown on her face. You don’t know what that look meant.

“I-I don’t understand. I just saw her the other day when I...” Almost choking on the words as it felt like your throat was closing up, you stopped yourself from continuing that sentence. “How did she die?”

“What I heard was that someone broke in sometime during the night and strangled her. Nothing appeared to be stolen, so they think it was a targeted attack.” She explains, heaving a deep troubled sigh.

You didn’t even know what to think or say. None of it made any sense to you. Sure, Jiwan wasn’t the most enjoyable person to be around but how could she be gone just like that? You were one to talk, after scalding her with a hot beverage just the other day. The thought made you gasp a little, eyes widening as the entire situation registered in your mind. God, you probably looked so guilty.

“Where were you?” Nayeon’s voice breaks you out of your train of thought, eyes snapping back up to see a cautious expression on her face.

“What do you mean?” Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion.

“Like last night... after you left.” She waved her hand around in a hurried explanation.

“I came here. I’ve been here the whole night.” You explained carefully, trying to figure out where she was going with this. “Why?

“Just wondering.”

Your jaw dropped in shock, reeling back to look at her incredulously, “You think I did it.” 

“No, I mean- I don’t know what to think.” She sighs, running a hand over her face in frustration. 

“Look, you have to admit you might be considered a suspect after everything. What with the way she was harassing you for weeks and your history...”

“Are you kidding me? I know I’ve had anger problems in the past but I’m not a killer.” You huff irritably, crossing your arms over your chest like a child.

“In the past? YN, you threw boiling hot water on that woman just the other day. You clearly have some unchecked anger here.” She gives you a look and now you truly feel like a child being scolded. “Plus, I’m sure finding out about me and Jihoon didn’t help-”

“Oh my god, I can’t believe this!” You snap at her, frustration oozing from your form as you pinched your nose. She made you feel like you were crazy. Maybe you were. “No, wait- what I can’t believe is that I’m actually talking to you right now.”

“Okay, let’s just be calm. I know I’m probably the last person you wanna see but let’s face it, you’re gonna need all the help you can get. Jihoon and I were the last people who saw you last night.”

“Where is Jihoon anyway?” You don’t bother looking at her, annoyed that you are even asking her about your boyfriend’s whereabouts. 

“I don’t know.” At her simple response, you snap your gaze back up at her accusingly. She shifts uncomfortably in her spot, awkwardly avoiding your glare.

“What? You guys didn’t sleep together last night?” You laugh bitterly despite not at all finding the situation humorous. “Isn’t that why you practically forced me to stay at this hotel?”

She heaves out a sigh, as if she’s stressed over the situation. “Look, I understand you hate me right now but I actually came here to help you. I was worried about you.”

“Oh, please-” You were ready to go off on her again when the buzzing of your phone interrupted you. Picking it up, you rolled your eyes at the sight of the caller ID. Speak of the devil.

“What-” The sound of heavy breathing and pained groans made you pause, listening intently to the other line. “Jihoon?”

“YN...” You had never heard your boyfriend’s voice sound like that, so helpless and weak. Jihoon had always been calm, almost monotone. Something was definitely wrong.

“What’s wrong?” You felt the bed dip as Nayeon quickly sat next to you, her ear now pressed up to the phone as well.

The line was silent for a while, your heart pounding in your chest as you waited for a response. Just when it looked like Nayeon was about to lose her composure and grab the phone from you, the call ended. You stared down at the screen in shock, not understanding any of it.

“What the fuck, call them back!” You startled at the sound of Nayeon’s panicked voice, fingers nervously tapping at your screen to redial when a text came in.

The picture that had come in looked like something from a horror movie. Jihoon was tied to what looked like a dentist’s chair, cuts and bruises littering the exposed skin of his face and hands. His clothes were torn and dirtied with blood in some places. But the scariest part of all were his eyes - once always so bright and beautiful behind his glasses were now shut, the skin around them puffy and purple. He looked dead.

Nayeon barely had time to look at the picture before the phone started ringing again. The two of you stared at each other in shock for a moment. You felt as if you were on auto-pilot, just letting her take the reins as she answered the call with shaking hands.

“What did you do to him?” Nayeon spoke, her voice thick with emotion. You couldn’t hear their response but it clearly only served to make her more upset if her pinched facial expression proved anything. “I don’t care if you want to talk to her - put Jihoon on!”

“I’d be nice to me if I were you, seeing as your lover’s life is in my hands. Put YN on right now,” Nayeon had already done it before he said it, and you weren’t prepared for it when he suddenly addressed you. “Are you listening, YN?”

“Yes.” You cringed at how weak your voice sounded.

“Your boyfriend wants to see you. You shouldn’t have run away, YN.” 

“Don’t you dare touch him!” Strangely enough, you were glad Nayeon was here because you weren’t sure if you would have had the courage to speak on your own.

“Why not?” There was the sound of shuffling on the other end before he heaved a deep sigh. “He means nothing to me.”

“You sick bastard, I’ll kill you!” You flinched at how loud Nayeon got, her features twisted in anger. In the back of your mind, you wondered if she might break your phone from how tightly she was gripping it.

“I’m planning a special get-together for the roommates tonight, YN. I’d really love it if you came... and you can bring your friend I guess.” You could practically hear his eye-roll through the speaker. “If you try to call the police or run away again, I’ll know. Don’t make me upset or you’ll regret it.”

There was a pause as you both tried to process his words, not understanding his plan but knowing it couldn’t be good. Nayeon opened and closed her mouth a few times, clearly as stunned as you felt.

“I’ll be waiting here for you.”

taglist: @min-mingii @micheleinumaki @potaetopic @namjinieesope @mageprincess7 @minshookie29 @outro-kook @nikipedia07 @axniyx @kittykatfey @peaceout97 @kurodach @bex-tk1 @sa7kou @purpuravm @doublebunv @amylouisecullen @rossemayme @unsureofwhathappens @sleepy-time-dreamy @anushaackerman @shyloh-the-cornsnake  @toughbook @urbanbts @carpioassists @millenniumspec @maliyachan @lovely247 @croctears @uarmyhore @shadoweepingscream @inlovewiththehpcast @jcrml​

A/N: welp... a lot of shit hit the fan in this one ngl😅 lmk what u think but also pls be nice!! hehe i know some ppl didn’t want them to cheat but i had to do it for the plot lmao im sorryyy. we’re almost all the end tho only one more chapter to go and then the craziness will end woooo

#yandere #yandere fanfic #yandere fanfiction #yandere x reader #yandere kpop #yandere bts #yandere bts x reader #yandere bts x yn #yandere namjoon #yandere seokjin #yandere yoongi #yandere hoseok #yandere jimin #yandere taehyung #yandere jungkook #bts fanfic #bts fanfiction #bts x reader #bts x yn #strangers from hell au #kpop fanfic #kpop fanfiction

[writingonesdreams]

You do realise that white and straight characters make up the majority of American literature still and that tumblr's desire for diversity is a tiny microcosm of the writing community? You're not being forced to include anyone. Perhaps if you don’t like minorities speaking up for themselves you'd be better suited to a place like Reddit.

You realize I'm not an American, anon. That's probably why their concerns not only don't apply to me, they get quite overwhelming and unfitting, when I get flooded with them.

I'm not a native English speaker nor an American, so I really don't know why I should be forced to deal, resolve or represent American problems. English is an international language with the potential to connect people all over the world and with so many different people and origins, you get a whole scale of different problems.

That's the issue here. We all have our probelms, anon. We are all minorities in some settings, situations and contexts. We all have our struggles and unfairness done to us, and we can't all be concerned with everybody's problems. We have to be careful about what problem we pick and choose to write about. It's logical people will choose those personally relevant and important to them. We should all be free to do this. Since my problems differ a lot from the majority of Tumblr (with me being a mentally and physically healthy straigh cis white girl from post-communistic European country who likes capitalism) it's easy to get the feeling in the writeblr community that I'm an outsider and an immoral person for not caring about specific minority problems. I'm a minority too here and in real life, because of my language and country of origin. And honestly I don't go around demanding people to represent me and guilting them into doing so. A friend decided on her own to draw inspiration from my home country for her fantasy book, and it was an amazing feeling, but I had never suggested, lecutred or begged her into doing it. Maybe I should be doing more to represent my own country and my own discrimination and minority problems, who knows. But I'm just not interested in it. I want to write about the stuff that makes me happy and interested, and if that doesn't include representation (of people similar to me or totally different than me) then I should be free to do that, without people hating, guilting or claiming I'm doing something wrong, if I'm not doing something for them specifically. I should be free to do that without anxious feelings, that blogs here will turn on me, that my friends might be offended, that I will start getting angry hateful anons.

If I'm not being forced, that's only right and good so. I do protest those posts that make it sound like representation of whatever minority, is a precondition to a worthwhile story, and that stories can't be good if they don't include representation XYZ. And I would like to make this known to other writblrs as well. There isn't a checklist of representations and ideologies you have to include in your writng to be a good writer. There isn't a checklist you have to include to be a good person. Don't let the pressure from others force you to write something you don't want to.

Other then that, include any representation you want to or find important. Make self-inserts. Make all characters gay if that's what you like. But don't go jumping at me for writing striaght characters, or liking romance, or not feeling bad as a women for wanting kids, or not disliking capitalism based on my life experience, or preferring men friendships over women ones. 

The reasons why we like reading & writing what we do are very personal, individual, often illogical, emotional and irrational, and I think we should all be allowed to explore and enjoy that without feeling guilty, cause our interests don't match some kind of trending noble moral justice ideology on the internet. I have seen European writers being so taken by the American politics discourse and pressure posts, they feel obligated to write about black characters in all their stories, although they have never met or seen an Afro-American person in their life. There would be nothing wrong with that, if that desire came from real interest and not the enforcement policy on Tumblr. I have seen German writers screaming about the BLM movement, although that was a completely American movement, taking place in very specific political climate with specific incidents. Europe is just different. We don't divide people accoriding to race, we are all intermixed from all sides. Every Austrian's great grandmother is Slavic. Half of Slavic people have German or Jewish last names. You have people from Italy or Turkey or Vietnam all over the big cities that have darker skin colour, so no one will walk to you and introduce themselves as black or biracial or whatever. The diversity here is ever present and normal, with ofc its own specific probelms and discriminations. Americans don't get that. And I think lots of European writerbls (or other ones all over the world, America is not the center of everything, y’know) don't get that either, when they come and get manipulated and swayed by the American centric concerns and slogans into fighting for ideologies that don't have anything to do with them, while ignoring the discourses and problems they live in.

What I'm trying to say is this: I don't think anyone has the right to claim you are a terrible immoral person, just because you don't care about all issues. Or their issues. We can't all care about everybody all the time. We should all be free to choose what we care about. We only have so much time, so many stress levels, so many spoons. You have to take care of your health, of your comfort, of your happiness - and when that is done, you will have much more energy and time to help others. That is what I believe. 

#ask #anon #writing community

[fueledbyapplepi]

Hi! Can I request Chifuyu, Kazutora, Ran, and Mitsuya with a s/o who has been accused of something and they actually believe it. All the evidence points to s/o but it’s not her. She tries to prove her innocence but her boyfriend won’t listen to her. Her boyfriend even ignores her or makes her feel guilty, even though she knows she is innocent. Finally the truth comes out and her boyfriend feels bad about treating her terribly and believing the lies. Pls fill it with angst. Thank you!

Crush You Right Back | Chifuyu, Kazutora, Mitsuya, and Ran

- Falsely accusing their s/o

Part 1 | Part 2

warnings: cussing, mentions of cheating

genre: angst

A/N: This is such a good idea. I hope you'll be able to enjoy this, anon! Wrote this around 4 A.M yesterday while the rain was pouring and I felt like I was in a music video LMAO.

Chifuyu Matsuno

Being accused of something is one thing. But being accused by your lover is another.

Your relationship with Chifuyu has been falling apart. It has been weeks when your boyfriend stopped talking to you. What's worse is you don't even know if you're still together anymore.

You weren't sure how Chifuyu got the story, but he suddenly accused you of going out with a man from another gang and cheating on him. According to Chifuyu's source, you were seen being all over this person while Toman was out and busy kicking ass.

You tried telling Chifuyu that you have no idea where this was all coming from. But your boyfriend never even tried to listen. He just pointed his finger at you and cried out his frustrations. Something out of character for him.

"I never thought that I'll be with a fucking cheater. Goodbye, Y/N," were the last lines of Chifuyu before he left your apartment.

Just the thought of it makes your heart clench. But what hurts more is Chifuyu - someone who you truly love and trusted - accusing you of cheating. Something that you never thought of doing in a million years.

If Chifuyu's going to walk out on you like that, you just wished he would've ended properly.

However, Chifuyu's heart was filled with guilt. The cheating accusation got the worse of him. He never thought that you'll do it, but hearing something like that triggered him.

Now here he is, on the other side of your door, thinking of how he would face you after accusing you of something like that. After weeks of ignoring you, he found out yesterday that it was the wrong person. Apparently, it was a s/o of another member of Toman who has similar features as you.

How can he be so fucking foolish?

As Chifuyu was about to knock on your door, you on the other hand opened it as you were on your way out to have some air.

"Chifuyu?" you said surprised.

Chifuyu was surprised. The guilt eating him even more as he looked at you with puffy eyes and a swollen face.

"Never thought you'll show up," you continued.

You can't help but be angry at him though. After ending things without even hearing you out, you'll use this chance.

"Y/N, I'm...sorry," Chifuyu said, tears brimming in his eyes. "I know I fucked up, but...I believe you now," he said.

"Believe me now? Chifuyu, you should've believed me from the start," you said, trying to sound angry despite feeling your cheeks get wet.

"Please, Y/N...just let me make it up to you. I beg you," Chifuyu said as he hugged you. "You're the only person I've ever loved,"

"Love isn't enough. You should've trusted me," you said pushing him away. 

"Goodbye, Chifuyu," you said as you shut the door on him.

Your heart is crushed by hearing Chifuyu sob on the other side of the door. But you can't turn back now.

He's the one who shattered your trust after all.

Kazutora Hanemiya

Every relationship has its challenges, you knew that.

But distrusting your partner and accusing them of something that you know they couldn't possibly do isn't one of the challenges you would've expected.

Kazutora, your dear boyfriend, has accused you of spreading rumors about his crime and the things he has gone through while he was in juvie. The rumors spread like a wildfire in the gang and to other people for that matter.

It's not like Kazutora cared about what other people would think of him. The main issue is that you were apparently the one who spread those rumors.

You were the only person that he cared and trusted enough for those secrets. So why would you do that to him?

But it's not like you really did.

Even if a gun is pointed at your head, you'll NEVER betray Kazutora. But why is it easy for him to trust those rumors?

Maybe he never loved you. Maybe he only used you. Maybe he got bored and decided to end things off by trusting those rumors.

You can never forget the night how he easily pointed the finger at you and left you all sobbing and pleading while he walked away and told you to never talk to him again.

Meanwhile, Kazutora has been staring at his phone for over an hour now. Thinking if he should call you or not.

Fuck it.

Kazutora felt like his soul will leave out of his body. What if you don't answer? What if you wouldn't listen to him?

"Kazutora?" a voice answered on the line.

"Y/N! Thank God I thought you'll ignore me," Kazutora said, a thorn felt like being removed off his chest.

"Like how you did to me? I'm not like that," you replied, trying to remain calm.

"Y/N, look. I'm sorry if I accused you of that. Well, I just found out that the main culprit was someone I was with while in juvie. They just wanted to break us apart and get through me," Kazutora explained. "...and I just thought, we can see each other again?"

You felt tears pooling out of your eyes. Your heart screaming for Kazutora while your mind fighting for what is right.

"Kazutora, I think you're getting it wrong," you said, trying to conceal the sting in your voice "You said to never talk to you again, and I thought it's right,"

"What?" Kazutora said, his heart dropping from what he's about to hear.

"Y/N, are you..breaking up with me?" he asked, hand gripping tightly on the phone.

"No. Kazu, you're the one who broke up with me. And, I'm just telling this to clear things up," you explained.

"Y/N, I'm sorry. Please, don't do this to me," Kazutora cried.

"That apology was all I ever wanted to hear. Thank you, Kazu," you replied, sadness dripping in your voice as you ended the call.

You were the last ray of hope for Kazutora, and now you're gone because of him.

All because of a stupid rumor, and his distrust of you.

Mitsuya Takashi

He just wanted to punch himself for being so fucking dumb. How can he be oblivious?

About a week ago, someone tipped off Toman that you were a member of the enemy gang and that you used Mitsuya to get in information. When Mikey found out about this, he immediately instructed Mitsuya to break things off with you.

But after the fight with the said gang, they found out that none of those things about you were true. You were only used to manipulate and throw Toman off.

Now, Mitsuya regretted the things he has said to you.

What your boyfriend told you was truly hurtful. When he brought up those things about you being a spy, the words that spilled out of Mitsuya didn't sound like Mitsuya at all.

"I regret this, Y/N," was what Mitsuya said before ending things with you.

It's like your voice and your side didn't even matter at all.

Mitsuya was a nice boyfriend. Perfect, even. You never even thought that the day that he'll break your heart will come. One where he didn't even try to let you explain.

How can you possibly be a spy from another gang? That sounded dumb enough. You didn't even think that Mitsuya will be dumb enough to believe it.

Here you are, moping around your couch as you finished another tub of ice cream - the only thing keeping you sane from your heartbreak. And to your surprise, you heard a knock on your door.

Thinking that it was Emma, who has been coming by to comfort you, you headed for the door.

"Emma, thank you for your care but-" you cut off yourself, surprised as to who was it.

"Mitsuya," you said, surprise evident in your tone.

"Y/N, I came here to fix things up," Mitsuya said as he stared into your eyes.

You gulped. Just staring at your now ex-boyfriend.

Seeing Mitsuya made your head spin and your heart hurt. Despite missing him, all you could ever think of was how he said that he regretted being with you.

You tried to shut the door off, but Mitsuya was quick to hold into it.

"Y/N, look, I'm sorry," Mitsuya said "I should've known it wasn't you. I should've. But I didn't. And I am sorry," he said, worry painted all over his face.

"You said you regretted it," you said, trying to look everywhere but Mitsuya.

"I was wrong," he replied.

"Mitsuya, I don't even care if you're wrong or right. I might miss you, but you hurt me," you said as your voice cracked.

"Just leave me alone, please," you said as you close your eyes.

"Y/N, at least let me work on us," Mitsuya pleaded, now holding onto your hands.

You shook your hand away from him.

"I SAID LEAVE!" you half-shouted, not caring what the neighbors would think.

Mitsuya loosened the grip on your hand. His heart, crushing from you pushing him away.

And with that, you shut him off.

Maybe you'll regret this, maybe you won't. But at least today, you saved yourself from what you thought was just another foolishness.

Ran Haitani

Was an apology and a bouquet of roses ever enough for the damage to be caused?

Ran held onto the flowers as he thought of the things he'll say to you. How he's sorry. How he regrets everything he said.

If only he could turn back the time.

It has been a month since Ran stopped talking to you. He wasn't really clear if you two have already broken up, but you assumed you were.

Ran accused you of leaking him and Rindou's plan on ambushing the enemy gang and being paid for exchange. How can he not assume it was you when you were the only person who knew besides Rindou?

He handled the situation roughly. He could remember how it was a long argument over the night.

-

"And you were the only person I told you this about Y/N? You!" Ran said in between gritted teeth.

"And I told you, Ran. It wasn't me. I would never snitch on you like that," you cried while defending yourself.

"So you're telling me it's Rindou?" he replied.

"NO! Rindou would never! Ran, maybe the other gang saw this was coming!" you argued helplessly.

"Yeah. They saw it coming because it was you,". Ran said as he pointed a finger, "YOU, Y/N!"

"Ran... I love you, I won't do that," you said as tears fall from your eyes.

"Bullshit," Ran replied. "Don't ever come to see me again,"

That's what all Ran said before he left you.

-

Remembering that argument, made you feel stupid and foolish that someone, who's one of the notorious Haitani brothers could ever believe you.

But it was all buried now in your heart. If Ran can't build trust with you, you can with others.

And now Ran felt guilty and over the edge. Apparently, you were right. The enemy gang was able to predict their move because their plan was poor.

Now here he is, holding onto his speech of apology and his plan to win you back.

But that was all shattered when Ran saw you. Back facing him. But he knew it was you. How could he not? He loves you, and he knows you like the palm of his hand.

Here you are, right in front of his eyes smiling beautifully as ever. But, you were smiling for another person.

And it isn't for him.

Right. He left you. How could he expect you to just mope around and cry over him? You're beautiful, outgoing, and confident - one of the few reasons why he fell in love with you. Of course it's no surprise if others would see the same.

And all Ran could do was stare and regret.

He might be a Haitani and could have everything in Roppongi, but you.

#tokyo revengers #tokyo revengers x reader #tokyo revengers x y/n #tokyo revengers x you #tokyo revengers headcanons #tokyo revengers imagines #chifuyu matsuno #chifuyu x reader #chifuyu x y/n #chifuyu x you #chifuyu imagines #kazutora hanemiya #kazutora x reader #kazutora x y/n #kazutora x you #kazutora imagines #takashi mitsuya #mitsuya x reader #mitsuya x y/n #mitsuya x you #mitsuya imagines #haitani brothers #ran haitani #ran x reader #ran x y/n #ran x you #ran imagines

[fic-writer-and-enjoyer]

Something Bad (Part 5- Finale)

Summary: "Through the fault of her golden heart, the reader gets brutally raped. Leaving marks not only on her body but also in her mind"

Pairings: Dean!Brother x Sister!Reader, Sam!Brother x Sister!Reader, Castiel!Friend x Reader

Warnings: Sexual assault, Rape, Blood, Swearing, Mentions of nudity

A/N: "Thank you for enjoying the series! More fluff-angst content coming soon!"

"If you want to be added to the tag list message me or comment!"

Word count: 2300ish

First part.

You looked at Dean in shock. You weren’t sure what was happening. Looking at the man tied in the chair, you noticed his mouth was gagged, and his arms and legs were hindered. His face was mostly swollen, with blood dripping from his brow, lips, and temple. Despite his battered appearance, you could tell he was tired, angry, and scared.

“It’s a shapeshifter,” Sam explained. “The one who did it to you” You watched your older brother, his jaw clenched with anger. All you wanted at that moment was to rip that bastard’s head off. Just because he looked like your brother, it made little difference.

“Take this” Dean handed you a gun, and you loaded it without hesitation.” They’re silver” The shapeshifter struggled, trying to say something. You rolled your eyes and took the cloth out of his mouth.

“Y/N, please, it’s me, Dean! They are the shapeshifters! Please! They did something to Sammy and…” the man begged, and you raised the pistol.

“Why?” You asked, not listening to his pleading.

“Y/N, I’m your brother! Please, I can prove you! Remember this one time-“

“WHY?!” Before he could finish, you screamed, your voice breaking down even more. You saw tears building in your eyes, and fury filled your whole body.

Despite all these gathering emotions, you’ve just been empty. Washed out of memories. Now anger has shut off anything else, the adrenaline pumping through your veins.

People always look for the guilty after a tragedy... trying to find the cause.

Some blame doctors, some God, and some take it on themselves.

But you weren’t looking for the guilty in no man. You found him in a monster that preys on the misfortune of others. If you pulled the gun, you wouldn't feel guilty.

If he had one, you wouldn't feel bad for his family. You’d be relieved to kill that bastard.

You’ve killed monsters many times before. Every death left you having second thoughts. You believed that nobody was purely evil. Nothing was really black or white.

But this was different. After a moment, your hand stopped shaking, and the tears that ran down your cheeks withered, not blocking your vision anymore.

You were ready.

You switched off the safety on the gun and looked at your brothers.

They both had poker faces, washed off of any character. But you ignored it. That shapeshifter wasn’t like the others.

You turned back to the bound man and raised the gun to his head.

You would pull the trigger

You would do it, in that exact moment, not letting him explain anymore. You would kill him on the spot, in cold blood.

If not for the limp hand, the arm barely sticking out from behind the large bookcase. You immediately recognized it was Sam, noticing the watch you gave him for his birthday years back. A dark red pool of blood surrounding it.

They did something to Sammy

Suddenly, it all made sense. You looked at the tied man with surprise written all over your face. He recognized your expression and grinned slightly, as much as his swollen face would allow.

You turned around, proving your theory. He didn’t have his watch on. You turned one last time towards the tied man.

“Y/N, do it.” ‘Dean’ said, crossing his arms over his chest, “NOW!” He screamed, giving you goosebumps. You had to choose.

The sound of a gunshot filled the room. Ringing in your head.

You shot.

“YOU LITTLE BITCH!” ‘Sam’ hissed as he grabbed his arm flowing with blood and smoke.

Shapeshifters.

You felt a hard fist hit your cheekbone, sending you to the ground. You didn’t even notice when the gun disappeared from your hands as the monster you shot crushed you to the ground and punched you in the face.

Between the waves of pain, you caught Dean’s struggling and screams. Not of pain but pure terror.

Both shapeshifters were standing over you two. One pointing his weapon at your brother, the other punching you.

They wanted Dean to watch, see you suffer.

You could not break out from under the giant; you struggled and kicked, trying to break free, and the monster laughed terribly.

He pinned your hands over your head and pressed his legs against your torso. You stared in shock as he dug his fingers into the gunshot wound and pulled the bullet out. The hole in his arm healed immediately.

He pressed against you again. You felt his hardness, and you went completely stiff. No, this can’t be happening. Not again, not again-

“It’s my turn to play now,” He growled, sliding his lips over your barely covered breasts.

“LEAVE HER, YOU SON OF A BITCH” Dean screamed, struggling, screaming in horror.

“Don’t worry, we’ll finish with her soon,” His double muttered. “You’ll know how it felt,” He said through gritted teeth, “Watch your whole family die, not being able to do anything.”

Dean sputtered as he focused his attention on the monster holding him at gunpoint. “So this is what it’s about? Revenge, some hunter, killed your family, and now you’re on a killing streak?”

You felt ‘Sam’ pressing against you, slipping his hand under the short towel, revealing you completely in front of him. You sobbed loudly as you felt his touch. Dean just turned his head towards the standing shapeshifter.

He’s stalling. You understood when he gave you an apologetic look.

You had to play along too.

You clenched your thighs, growling, ignoring your abuser. You didn’t believe what came out of your mouth when you turned to your brother.

“Don’t worry Dean, I can take it,” you said, in a tone as if you wanted to cheer up your brother. You let out a groan through gritted teeth as the man clenched his hands tighter around your wrists.

The monster stopped and looked at the other. The shifter grinned at him.

“I’d take my time, yesterday was too faulty,” the standing shapeshifter hissed and held the grip tighter “Let’s show him how it’s done,” he chuckled as he observed your brother, “She’s wetter when she bleeds.”

The ladder’s voice made you shiver.

No, you couldn’t get these thoughts in your head. You’re stalling, remember. Both of you. You can do it.

Hearing your brother’s scuffling, the frustration in his voice. You tried to focus on the Winchester tied to the chair, deciding to distract yourself from the monster touching you.

You can do it.

The shapeshifter took a dagger from behind his pants and waved it in front of your eyes.

Ironically, you felt relief at the sight of the knife. You’d rather have them torture you all day than if you were to repeat what you been through last night.

“You and your pathetic father killed our family," ‘Dean’ growled as ‘Sam’ drove the blade across your skin.“I was twelve when I found my father dead in our living room” You could sense the regret in his voice, a pain that he must have endured for years.

“They were monsters,” Dean hissed. His double jumped up and hit him in the face with the mount of his weapon.

“THEY WERE OUR PARENTS” he screamed, delivering a second punch, this time to the stomach, forcing Dean to spit out the blood from his mouth.

“Why did you take it out on Y/N, then? She was just a baby when it happened,” He growled, spitting more blood onto the ground. Your scream interrupted their conversation. The knife went right through your thigh. You groaned in pain as the monster pushed the blade deeper. Your struggle only made the unimaginable pain in your leg worse.

“Oh, because I knew it was the only way for you to invite us over,” He casually clicked his tongue, looking at the blood dripping from your thigh “But without buying dinner first? So rude, thought your father raised you better,”

The man laughed deeply as Dean sent another wave of curses toward him. “Such a shame, though ... She was a fun one. If only you could hear her scream” You let out a groan as ‘Sam’ turned the knife.

“Oh right,” he laughed, “you will…”

Despite the pain, you felt the blood oozing from underneath the blade. You both had little time. Prepared for the next wave of pain, you squeezed your eyes shut as the shifter ripped the dagger from your thigh.

To your surprise, the ache didn’t come. You opened your eyes as a giant force pushed the monster off you. It landed on the floor, screaming in pain.

The bang of a fired gun spread through the room, echoing in your head seconds later.

It took you a second to understand what happened. Despite the unimaginable pain, you forced yourself to stand up from the floor.

You looked at a man in a trench coat a few feet away. He took out a lengthy silver blade from his cloak, easily incapacitating the monster. With one swift move, he stripped it off its head.

On the other side of the room, Sam was barely standing. Covered in his blood, holding a pistol at his brother’s double, who was already lying on the ground.

You immediately spotted the gun that you dropped when ‘Sam’ knocked and pinned you. You grabbed it while trying to ignore the excruciating pain.

During all the chaos, you limped towards Dean as fast as you could, swiftly untying the ropes. “I’m fine..” He mumbled as you wanted to study his swollen face.

Without asking, he took the gun from you and walked over to his brother, standing over the shot monster.

It was still groaning in pain, mumbling so quietly that its words were indistinguishable from each other. The wound in his chest was steaming, the silver bullet burning off his insides, torturing him. Good.

He was armless and defenseless, like you, when he knocked you out. In excruciating pain, having no one to save him, as you did too.

You weren’t sorry but looking at him dying, resembling your brother. Someone you loved so much and wanted to cherish every second with. It didn’t feel right.

Sam and Dean both raised their handguns at the shifter. Cas appeared next to you, holding you up as you barely could stand because of your leg.

Your brothers didn’t look better. Sam looked even worse than you did yesterday. His hands were shaking, and his legs barely kept him up. But he continued to point his gun at the wounded, with pure hatred in his eyes.

Looking at your eldest brother, you could swear that his lips were trembling. He was never one to show any emotions, but at that moment, despite his swollen face, he was like an open book.

“Please don’t,” said the monster, trying to mock your voice. Your brothers looked at it in shock, even though it looked like Dean, the voice seemed too real, even to you. They lowered their guns a bit, not knowing what to do.

But you knew.

You felt the monster’s touch in your head constantly. Seeing it suffer made the pain a little more bearable.

Taking the handgun from your brother’s hand, you came closer to the shifter. Your whole body shivered, not just from the cold, which made you almost stiff, being covered by only a blood-soaked towel. You calmed the shaking of your hand and raised the pistol.

“That’s for Sammy,” you grunted, firing one of the shots to the monster’s arm. He screamed in agony as the bullet got stuck in his shoulder.

“That’s for Dean” Another bullet went through his other arm. You couldn’t tell when one scream ended and the other began.

“And this one, this one’s for me,” you hissed, shooting him in the head. His cries stopped, and his face froze in a scream of terror.

You didn’t know if it was the pain, blood loss, relief, or shock, but after the last bullet, you fell to the ground crying.

Before you hit the cold floor, two firm hands grabbed you, softening your fall. Lifting your head, you saw a pair of blue, warm eyes looking at you tenderly.

“Cas ...” you sobbed as you cuddled to the angel. You felt the pain disappear from your body, and your eyesight got more stabilized.

“You’re safe now,” He whispered in your hair, and you sobbed even more.

Both your brothers knelt beside you, embracing you and Castiel. Your blood and tears mixed. Sobs, sniffles, quiet chuckles, hisses of pain, and sights of relief accompanied your embrace.

A small wave of warmth went through your body.

You’re safe now

You didn’t even know what to say. Neither did they. None of you expected someone to speak up. You just held each other in your arms, letting you digest fully what happened.

The death of the monster brought you some relief, but it didn’t make you feel much better. You still felt the presence of emptiness and fear in your chest. It was getting smaller, but it was still there.

But you knew the shifters wouldn’t hurt anyone again. And your brothers would not allow you to be hurt again. It all gave you a feeling of hope.

Hope for healing.

Hope for happiness.

Hope for closure.

You knew you wouldn’t get there today, or tomorrow

But one day you will

You let out a trembling breath and squeezed Castiel and your brothers, smiling gently as you felt them hugging you back.

The three of them will make sure of it.

Masterlist.

Tag-list: @shelleyj @flipperjanga11 @errorcosplay67 @savannah0111 @winchester227 @winchester10205

#supernatural imagine #ptsd #supernatural sister imagine #supernatural #imagine #supernatural fic #supernatural fanfiction #supernatural gif #sam winchester #sam x reader #dean winchester #dean x reader #sam!brother #dean!brother #winchester reader #sister imagine

[hanoella]

Deserving

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x healer!Reader

Word Count: 2.1k

Summary: When someone bad mouths Bucky in your presence, you set things straight.

Warnings: Angst, but with happy ending, and one vaguely 18+ insult? I'm new.

Speaking of- @wkemeup has inspired me to post my writing for the first time! For their 9k writing challenge, I used this prompt:

"Character A is the target of harassment on the street. Shamed, they pretend it doesn’t bother them. Until it happens in the presence of Character B, who reigns hell on whoever dared to upset [A]"

Enjoy!

..........

Bucky was used to the whispers he got from people the street when he passed by them.

“Is that-?”

“Don’t make eye contact, he’s dangerous.”

“They just let him walk around like he hasn’t killed a bunch of people?”

His enhanced hearing picked up more than he wished it did. He liked to believe it didn’t bother him but deep down it did. It was just one more reason to stay secluded. Isolated. Alone. And he had been successfully doing that.

Until you came along.

Having been the test subject of a super serum version that focused on health and regeneration, you used your healing powers to help the Avengers get back to world-saving shape. Bucky hadn’t been keen on anyone touching him, much less someone he didn’t know. Despite his best efforts, he had caved in when you noticed he was having a bad day with his shoulder and offered to help. Since then, your companionship has been like a guilty pleasure.

You had this way of making him feel like he was the most important person in the world to you. Regardless of what he thought was evident, you only seemed to notice the good in him, even when he protested.

“There’s nothing I can do to right the wrongs that I’ve committed. Redemption isn’t possible. I don’t deserve-”

“Stop.” You said, cutting him off. “You are amazing. You have been through everything that you’ve been through and you still give back to the world. You fight for a world that made you this way, a world that gives you nothing back and yet you fight. It’s the world that doesn’t deserve you.”

Bucky swallowed hard. Looking at you in your eyes, he saw no dishonesty. Only pure admiration.

After that, there was no hope of him being alone. You cracked open his shell slowly but surely and now Bucky couldn’t imagine life without you.

Which led him to his current predicament.

“Come on, please? It’ll be so good and only a few blocks away. I know tapioca sounds gross, but you’ll love it!”

Bucky didn’t know what bubble tea was but apparently it was worth begging him for the past 20 minutes while you worked on his shoulder. Your hands emitted a warm white light as you gently massaged his shoulder. The direct contact wasn’t necessary but Bucky hadn’t complained when you started doing it and it’s become routine every since.

“I don’t know. I know I’m old but I don’t have to resort to tapioca yet.”

Bucky let a moment pass before his lip twitched up into a smile. You feigned annoyance as you cut off the healing and placed your hands on his shoulders.

“How about you go with me and I won’t bill the heck out of you for my magical five-star massages.” You say as you squeeze his shoulders.

“Okay okay, fine.”

Bucky put his hands up in defeat as he got up from the couch he was sitting on and turned to face you.

You swallowed as you let your eyes drift across his chest before you grabbed his shirt from off the back of the couch and tossed it to him.

“Alright! I’m so excited!”

Bucky listened to you chatter on about the different flavors he could try while he put on his shirt. Sometimes, he couldn’t believe he actually had a friend besides Steve. Sure, it helped that you had been Steve’s friend first. But there was something about you having grown closer to him that made him feel special. Never did Bucky think there would be a time that he’d be jealous over a girl that Steve was friends with rather than the other way around. Times were certainly different.

“You coming?”

Bucky broke away from his thoughts and made his way towards the doorway that you were standing in.

“Yeah, let’s go.”

---

Yeah, he knew this was a bad idea.

As soon as you two had left Stark Tower, the whispers started. While the café was only two blocks away, you noticed something was off a block into the trip.

“You alright?” You asked as you tried to decipher his facial expression.

“Yeah. Fine.”

You looked at him skeptically and then shifted your eyes to follow his, glancing around you. You slowly nodded in understanding as you looked at the people around you who were trying not to draw attention to themselves.

“Okay. We can talk about it later.”

Bucky was thankful that most people talked quietly enough so that you couldn’t hear what they were saying.

Keyword: Most.

You two arrived at the café, where it was slightly crowded. It was a warm afternoon, the perfect time to get a cool drink. Before heading inside, you gently placed your hand on his arm for a moment to reassure him.

“If you want, we could look at the menu out here and then I’ll go inside to order it.”

Bucky shifted his weight slightly from one side to the other as he contemplated it.

“Nah. We can go in together.”

“Okay.” you said, gently smiling to hopefully reassure him.

You both enter the building and make your way to stand in line. Bucky looked around at the seating areas. It reminded him of a Starbucks but with a more pastel color scheme. You looked at him and he raised an eyebrow in response. You smiled, happy that he was with you. Bucky’s heart skipped a beat and he smiled back.

That’s when you hear it.

“Is that that Hydra goon? Hey, go back to Siberia you brainwashed Hydra dog!”

You spun around violently the same time Bucky did with an incredulous look on your face, making eye contact with the college aged boy further back in line who was currently sniggering with his friends.

You stalked over to them before speaking in a low even tone.

“Sergeant Barnes has done more for the world than you could ever dream of doing. Apologize.”

You had let the venom creep into your voice, shouting the last word and silencing the rest of the line. Bucky walked up to you and put a hand on your shoulder, trying to turn your attention to him.

“C’mon. It’s not worth it.”

You let out a slow harsh exhale from your nose but didn’t move. The man only sneered.

“Why don’t you scurry along. I don’t care if you’re where he sticks his-”

The next thing Bucky registered was a nasty sounding crack as your fist connected with the jerk’s cheekbone. A round of gasps came from the surrounding crowd as he fell on the floor, completely dazed. You let out a pained grunt as you bent over, holding your hand while trying to cover the white light that started coming over your hand where the skin had bust open and something had definitely cracked.

“Okay, time to go.” Bucky said as he made an executive decision to get you two the heck out of there before anybody could react further. He put his hand on your back and quickly guided you out of the store, walking until you were out of the vicinity and almost back to the tower. You could tell that Bucky was not happy with you since he hadn’t said anything the whole way back. You entered the building and then stood silently in the elevator as it made its way up, refusing to meet his eye.

The elevator dinged as it opened up on the team’s dorm floor. You both walked quickly trying to avoid other people unsuccessfully as Sam stepped out into the hallway from the gym.

“Hey you two, what’re you… What happened to you?” He asked with a furrowed brow, nodding his head towards your hand as you walked past. Bucky and you answered at the same time.

“Nothing-”

“None of your business Sam-”

You gave Bucky a look and started chastising him.

“Hey, don’t be mean to him just because-”

“Keep. Walking.” He said through clenched teeth.

You rolled you eyes and shrugged apologetically at Sam as Bucky punched in the code to your apartment and swung the door open. He nudged you inside and then followed, shutting the door forcefully behind him.

Sam looked down the hall for a moment longer before shrugging it off. Natasha popped her head out into the hallway from the gym.

“What’s all the commotion?”

“Not sure. I think Mr. Tall, Dark and Metal left a few brain cells behind in the pod the last time he was frozen.”

Natasha snorted and then turned back into the gym.

---

Bucky closed the door behind him and then swung his arms out in confusion, giving you the same look of disbelief that he gives Yori when he starts a fight with his neighbors. You gave him the same look back, as if he was crazy for questioning your actions.

“What was that?” He finally asked.

“That guy was crazy! How could I not say something to him?”

“You didn’t have to hit him and hurt yourself! People say stuff like that all the time, you just have to ignore it and move on with your day.”

You stayed silent for a moment, averting your gaze and holding your injured hand that was gently glowing. Bucky gently let out his breath. He closed the distance between you and put his hand under yours to help you support it. His other hand grasped your forearm, gently moving over your smooth skin. He glanced down and watched as the inflammation went away and a bone shifted back into place under your skin.

“Please,” He whispered, his hold on you tightening ever so slightly. “It’s not worth all the trouble. It’s not worth you getting hurt.”

“No.”

Bucky snapped his head back up to see you calm and determined. Speaking again, you look into his eyes.

“It is worth it.”

He blinked twice, not having expected that answer.

“Why?”

“Because if I had let him say what he was going to say. Then to me, it would be validating anyone who has ever said anything like that about you. I can’t let you believe that any of that is true.”

“I don’t believe it.”

“But you do.” You cried out, slipping your newly healed hand out of his grasp and stepping away.

“I can see it in your actions, Bucky. I see it when you deny yourself anything that would make you happy. I see it when you try to hide yourself from the world. I see it when you look at me.” You spoke, voice wavering with the last sentence, averting your gaze again. Bucky stood silent as you continued.

“I see a deep sadness in your eyes. I can feel it in your soul when I heal your shoulder. Or when you touch my hand to see if I’ve fallen asleep. I can feel it emanating off of you. But I know for a fact that you deserve to be happy. You deserve to rest and to be happy. How many times have you fought a fight that wasn’t yours because it was the right thing to do? And don’t say it was to redeem yourself because I know it’s more than that. You are a good man, James. You don’t need to prove anything to anyone. But if you need to prove it to yourself than just take a look at me.”

You gently hold his face and guide it so that he’s looking at you. He’s surprised to find your eyes full of tears, threatening to spill over.

“When you look into my eyes, there is nothing but love and admiration for you. When you touch me, I feel the warmth you leave on my skin. When you hear me speak, you should be able to tell from what I say that I genuinely think you deserve the world. When you are hurting, the only thing I feel is your anguish. It kills me, to see you punish yourself so undeservedly.”

You were whispering now, looking up at him. Bucky’s eyes were watering as well, his jaw clenched in an attempt to hold back his emotions. With your hands still gently caressing his cheeks he slowly lowered his head so that his forehead was resting on yours, swallowing hard.

Bucky lifted his head slightly so that he could look at you and he saw nothing but love. Your eyelashes were wet and shimmering from tears you shed for him. Your cheeks were flushed from the overwhelming feeling that you had for him. He looked into the depths of your eyes and saw only his future with you. Finally, his gaze settles on your lips, soft and supple.

“Please,” you begged. “Please do not ask me to stand idly by as the world tears you apart. You are worth more to me than anything else in it.”

Slowly, his hands touch your waist and slide back until he’s holding you against him. Closing the gap between you, you kiss.

Nothing more in this world could assure him of your love. For once, he believes it.

#kas9kwc #bucky barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x you #bucky barnes fanfiction #bucky barnes fluff #bucky barnes angst #fatws #bucky x y/n #bucky imagine

[notkageyamasprincess]

what’s so wrong about us? | kageyama tobio x reader

characters: nii-chan!kageyama tobio x reader

genre/warnings: smut, incest, degradation, blackmail, dubcon, slight exhibitionist kink, unprotected sex

words: 2.0k

summary: you and tobio-nii don’t have a typical brother-sister relationship. how far can you go without getting yourselves caught?

notes: please please read the warnings.

“Haah…mhn…w-wait, we can’t! Mom and Dad are coming home tonight, we have to get ready.”

Your hands clutched at the sheets so hard that your knuckles were turning white. Kageyama pulled your lower half closer to him so that your ass hung over the edge of the bed, and kneeled between your legs, fucking you furiously with his fingers and tongue. You felt his hot breath fan over you as he removed his mouth.

“That’s exactly why we have to do it now. Let me taste you and get my fill.”

You cried out when he dragged a long digit against your sensitive spot and sucked your bud harshly, making you tighten around him and spray your release.

“Ah, not so rough! I’m still…ah, so-sore.”

Your older brother wiped his face with a towel and responded by spreading your quivering thighs even wider, drinking in the view of your glistening cunt.

“Well, looks like down here is really enjoying it. This slutty pussy wants more, doesn’t it?” He plunged his fingers back inside, fucking into you, filling the room with your wet noises. “Hear that? God, your cute pussy’s just dripping all over my hand. But you’d rather me stuff it full with something else, don’t you?”

You could only moan his name, too far gone to string together a coherent sentence. He was already edging you closer and closer to another orgasm. “Mmhn…yes…a-ah… Tobio.”

He frowned, stopped completely and took out his fingers, licking them clean of your juices. “Wrong name. Did you forget what to call me?”

“Sorry, Nii-chan…”

“Good.” He resumed his ministrations, slowly rubbing the inside of your walls. “Now, how do we ask for what we want?”

“Please…Nii-chan.”

Kageyama shook his head. “You can do better. What happened to the good little whore from yesterday, huh? Begging so sweetly to cum from her Nii-chan’s cock?”

You whined in desperation. “Tobio-nii, please! Please stretch out my hole with your fat cock. Want Nii-chan to fill me up with his cum.”

He grinned and nodded approvingly. “Good girl,” he cooed, unzipping his jeans. “Time for my pretty cumslut to get her reward.”

You heard the jingling of keys and the front door unlocking.

Your eyed widened and your brother cursed. “Shit, they weren’t supposed to come back this early.”

Your mother called out first. “Kids! We’re home and we brought takeout! Dinner will be ready in twenty minutes.”

“____, Daddy got you a souvenir on his business trip, come see what I have for you.”

“Really? Thanks Daddy! I’ll be down in a second, Tobio-nii’s uh…helping me with something.”

You rushed to put your skirt back on and made your bed while Tobio put on a large hoodie to hide his erection.

+++++

You took a sip of water, trying not to think about what you and your brother were just doing as you chatted over dinner. The conversation moved onto work-related matters, so you sat and ate quietly while your parents exchanged stories.

Kageyama leaned over to reach a dish on your side of the table. “____, give me a handjob,” he murmured in a low voice.

You quickly checked if your parents heard before whipping your head towards him. “No way in hell. It’s too risky,” you hissed.

“I didn’t get to cum and I’m hard again. It’s because of you, so take responsibility.”

“You’re not serious.”

“If you won’t do it, then I’m going to tell Mom and Dad everything we’ve been doing for the last few months,” he threatened.

You started getting nervous. “Nii-chan… you wouldn’t…”

Seeing your frightened expression, he started coaxing you more gently. “Come on, please? Help out your poor Nii-chan…he’s in so much pain. Be a good little sister for me, alright?”

You snuck a glance at your parents once more just to make sure they were still engrossed in their discussion before slipping a hand down his pants. Thankfully, the tablecloth is able to cover his lap. You felt his dick twitch in your palm as you gave him slow strokes.

“Tobio-nii, this is enough right? Let’s stop here.”

“Stop moving and I’ll lift up my hoodie and show them exactly what’s going on. You wouldn’t want to make Mom cry, do you?”

At that moment, the person in question piped up. “And what are you two whispering about?” She raised an eyebrow, waiting for your answer.

Tobio flashed her a sheepish smile. “Actually, we were trying to figure out what to get you for your birthday. It’s coming up soon, isn’t it? You weren’t supposed to know, though.”

“Oh, how sweet! Well don’t let me ruin your surprise,” she replied, covering her ears. “I know nothing.”

She leaned her head on your father’s shoulder as he too, smiled at you both warmly. “We did a good job with our children, didn’t we?”

“Sure did, honey.”

If only they knew.

You felt so guilty.

The irony is, you would never want to do anything to jeopardise the happiness of your family.

You tried your best to act normal as your brother somehow managed to speak casually with your parents. You felt his length straining against his boxers—he was getting close.

You heard the clatter of a utensil on the floor. “Sorry ____, I dropped my spoon, would you mind picking it up for me?”

You crouched under the table and immediately felt him nudge your head towards his crotch. He forced the head of his shaft between your lips, muffling your startled exclamations. He gave a few shallow thrusts before finishing in your mouth, and you swallowed out of habit. Tobio peered down at you discreetly, smiling in satisfaction. “Good girl,” he mouthed, patting your head.

As you shakily rose from the ground, your mother gasped sharply.

You froze. Were you caught?

“____ ____! Is that a hickey on your neck? Did you invite a boy over while we were gone? Young lady, what did I say about having boys over while we were out of the house?”

You slapped a hand to your neck in realization. Tobio left a mark on you the previous night and you had forgotten it was there. Despite still being in hot water, you were relieved that your mother didn’t seem to have an inkling of suspicion that it was your brother’s doing.

You began to make up an excuse, but Tobio cut in. “No, it’s my fault for letting her out of my sight. Don’t worry Mom, I’ll discipline her accordingly. She won’t have any more chances to fool around with boys if I have anything to say about it.”

“At least ____ has a responsible older brother like you, Tobio,” she sighed.

“It’s my job, after all. I’ll make sure she doesn’t get into any trouble.”

As if he wasn’t the one who almost revealed your dirty secret.

Your father chuckles. “Now honey, we were all at that age at one point. ____’s a big girl, she can handle herself and she knows what not to do.”

Except you apparently didn’t know not to have sex with your brother.

“Sweetie, you’re looking a little flushed, are you alright?” He cast you a concerned look.

Tobio took the opportunity to leave the table. There were other things he wanted to do anyways.

“Yeah Dad, now that you mention it, she doesn’t look very well. I’ll help her into her room.”

He guided you up the stairs and you slapped him away once you were out of earshot.

“Are you crazy? How could you do that with Mom and Dad sitting right across from us? You’re the worst. I hate having such a sick older brother like you!”

He feigns hurt but doesn’t take it to heart. He ushered you into your room and closed the door behind him. “Aw, princess, are you mad? I know I went a little too far but you enjoyed it too didn’t you? Don’t you love your Nii-chan?”

Tears began to prick at the back of your eyes. “This and that are different! You have no idea how terrible I felt when Mom talked about doing such a good job with us. We’re freaks. This…this is wrong,” you sniffled.

He caressed your waist softly and soothingly massaged your sides, rubbing circles into your skin with the pads of his thumbs, kissing away the tears that flowed down your cheeks.

“What’s so wrong about us? What’s so wrong about the way I feel, or the way you feel? Love is love, there’s nothing to be ashamed of.”

He backed you up slowly until you reached your bed, and laid you down, all the while continuing to whisper words of comfort in your ear.

He sat down beside you. “You’re moving out for college soon and you can come live with me. I’ll have a stable job. We’ll be free.”

You hiccupped and nodded. Your mood began to brighten when you thought about your future together. You just wanted to be with him.

After a few minutes, you felt a hand snaking up your legs to toy at the hem of your panties. You squeaked in protest, but Tobio shushed you.

“You know, I was impressed with your behaviour today, you were being such a good girl for me, weren’t you? Why’d you have to ruin that? Your words made Nii-chan so sad.”

He shifted from his position to trap you between his knees. You made an attempt to shove him off, but he took both your wrists in one hand and pinned them above your head.

“You know that Nii-chan doesn’t like brats. Our parents are still here, but once they leave, you know that I’ll have to punish you, right?”

“Hold on, let me check something.” He dipped a finger into your folds and smirked. “Ah, I was right. You’re wet from playing with my cock earlier. You enjoyed that just as much as I did. My cute little sister loves me this much, huh? It makes me happy.”

Tobio pulled his pants down halfway, tugged your underwear to the side and started grinding his bulge against your core. Your breath hitched in your throat. You could hear the sound of the tv and your parents cleaning up.

“Tobio-nii…hn…. s-stop, Mom and Dad might hear us!”

“Not until you say ‘Nii-chan, I love you’.”

“You said you weren’t going to do anything!”

“When did I say that?” He groaned when he felt your pussy clench over his clothed dick. “Fuck, you’re getting my boxers all damp. You shameless whore, you’re actually getting turned on from this.”

You tried squirming from his touch but accidentally grazed your clit on his erection, causing you to let out a moan. A dark grin appeared on Kageyama’s face, and he stripped off his bottoms, rubbing you with his bare cock.

“Mnh…Nii-chan, I…ah! Love you!” You panted. “I-I said it, so let’s stop already!”

Your lips parted when you felt him ease his length into your entrance.

“I changed my mind. It feels way too good when your sopping cunt is squeezing me like this.”

Your juices dripped down his shaft as he rammed himself harder inside you, hitting all the right places. “You dirty fucking slut, you actually want to get caught, don’t you? You can’t wait to see their expressions as they watch their kids fucking, huh? You just want me to drag you downstairs and take you on the kitchen table, right in front of their eyes, don’t you?”

You couldn’t think rationally, it felt so good; you were already hurtling towards your climax. He captured your lips to prevent your noises from escaping.

When he let you go, you realized that his hand was no longer holding you down. You braced your hands on his firm shoulders and your hips moved to meet his thrusts. You spread your legs open to take him deeper and he cursed at the sensation. “Shit, say it again, say that you love me.”

“Mmn, fuck…love you. Nii-chan, I love you!”

He pounded into you even faster. “That’s right. What’s so wrong about us?” he repeated. “What’s so wrong about a darling sister loving her Nii-chan?”

a/n: ngl it was damn hard to look my parents in the eye after writing this.

#haikyuu smut #haikyuu dark content #kageyama smut #kageyama tobio smut #kageyama tobio x reader #cw:incest #kageyama x reader #cw: dubcon #cw: blackmail #hq smut #hq dark content #haikyuu x reader #jia writes

[pies-writes-and-more]

when they find you sleeping

pairings : Akaashi Keiji, Kozume Kenma, & Ushijima Wakatoshi, all with a Fem!Reader

warnings: probably some swearing but all fluff otherwise 😊

a/n: i love how they just got longer from first to last lol anyways I took a lot of naps this past weekend because it was a long weekend for me so I thought I’d write about it 😊 enjoy! 

haikyuu masterlist

Akaashi could’ve sworn you sounded so stressed on the phone when you had called earlier. He had only imagined the worry in your eyes and he could practically hear you pacing in your room.

“Please?” You begged, gripping the phone to your cheek. “I promise I’ll make it up to you!”

Akaashi sighed, glancing at the clock that was in the gym, calculating how long he figured it would take him to walk to your place, “Fine. I’ll pack up and you better be ready to actually review with me! Not just goof around like last time,” he scolded you gently.

“Mhm! I will!” You told him, a smile in your voice as you hung up. Akaashi just shook his head slightly. The things he would do for you.

It didn’t matter that practice had run late and that he was starving. It didn’t matter that he really wanted to go home, eat something, and go straight to bed. It didn’t matter because the most wonderful person was waiting for him to come over and he would do anything- absolutely anything, to make you smile.

But when he got to your place, he couldn’t help but smirk seeing you on the floor. For someone who seemed so stressed earlier, you didn’t seem stressed now. There you were, on the floor, curled up and using one of your old plushies as a pillow, sleeping the night away. 

The boy just shook his head as he smiled, glancing around the room at the familiar smell of your mom’s cooking. He grinned, knowing that you had saved him a plate because you knew he was hungry, because somehow you always knew exactly what he wanted.

By the time you had opened your eyes from what was supposed to be just a small recharge, Akaashi had licked the plate clean and was going over the study material.

“Hey! You were supposed to study with me!” You whined, rubbing your eyes open with one hand as you swatted at his arm with the other.

“You were supposed to be awake to study with me,” he pointed out with a smile because you were the most perfect being he could ever lay eyes on, even if you had just woke up from a nap.

“Okay okay okay I’m ready, test me!” You asked eagerly, holding up your textbook to him, shaking your head awake so you could concentrate. 

Akaashi just watched you for a moment, that smile of his reaching his eyes as he just looked at you. He asked you some questions, going over some study material and both of you finding it easy to talk things out with someone else there. He watched you as the two of you studied, just glimpses here and there. He loved you, even if he had never said it before, he did. And maybe, if this exam went well, he would tell you.

Kenma couldn’t help but feel just a bit of guilt in him as he found you passed out on his couch. His eyes drifted to the screen on his phone, noting that you had been over for at least 2 hours now and he had only now taken the time to realize where you were.

You had shown up a few minutes early, beaming sunshine and all things perfect like you always did. But even though the two of you had planned this movie night for weeks now, Kenma just couldn’t find it in himself to leave his game yet. “It’s alright, Kenma!” You had smiled, noting his hesitation. “Go ahead and finish whatever level you’re on. I’ll set everything up!”

It wasn’t out of character for Kenma to lose track of time, especially when playing a game, but this time, he felt extra guilty about it. There you were, on his couch, hugging a blanket that you probably brought for you to cuddle under during the movie, with the TV screen now sleeping because it had been too long, and a bowl of popcorn that had gone cold on a nearby table.

Kenma tried to think of what to say when you eventually woke up. He didn’t want to make you mad, because despite his actions in the last few hours, you really were the best thing that had ever happened to him (Kuroo liked to remind him of this all the time). Maybe... he could just go back and keep playing? No that would make things worse... right?

“Ken?” You grumble, sitting up slowly as you notice his presence in the room. He jumped at the sound of your voice, watching you carefully, as if gauging just how upset you were. “Oh! Are you all done now? Can we start?” You asked excitedly, still smiling so wonderfully over at him.

“...You’re not upset with me?” He asked carefully, sitting down next to you slowly.

You gave a small smile and just shook your head, “I knew when I first met you that I was going to love you. Even if that meant waiting on you.” You gave a little laugh at his somewhat stunned face, giving a bit of a whine when you realized the popcorn sitting there. “Damn, I knew I should’ve waited to get it ready. Now it’ll be all cold.”

Kenma shrugged and pulled the bowl onto his lap and tugged you closer to him, “It’s fine, we can always make more. I’m sorry I kept you waiting.” 

You snuggled into him, glad that you didn’t have to imagine him next to you anymore, “It’s alright. But maybe next time, just warn me you’re still playing so I don’t come over too early,” you teased and his cheeks turned red as he nodded.

Kenma wouldn’t be able to tell Kuroo later what the movie was about, even though Kuroo thought he was crazy for not paying attention.

“Who doesn’t pay attention to movies?” Kuroo scoffed.

Kenma just shrugged, looking up at the ceiling as he thought about his night with you. “It’s not that I really like the movies. I just... like being with her.”

“Have you even told her yet?” Kuroo nudged his best friend, raising an eyebrow. “Girls won’t wait around forever, you know.”

Kenma just sighed, knowing his friend was right, but there was just a little something in him that made him wonder if you already knew how he felt. “I knew when I first met you that I was going to love you,”... you hadn’t meant love love... had you? The thought tugged at Kenma’s brain all day long until he had had enough of it. It was starting to effect his gaming at this point because all he could think about was you. That’s it, he told himself with a huff. I’ll tell her today and just get it over with. 

Even though he decided on it so hurriedly, Kenma still gave the words he would say to you a lot of thought. This wasn’t like a game where he could try again later. He had one shot at this... and he wanted it to be perfect.

Ushijima should’ve sent you home. He had tried at the beginning of practice, but he should’ve been more firm. He scolded himself a little internally, shaking his head as he kneeled next to your sleeping body, which was lying on top of a makeshift pillow made from your jacket. You must’ve been so tired after class today and yet, you insisted to Ushijima that you wanted to walk home with him like usual.

“Who is that?” Goshiki had whispered not-so-softly as the rest of the team started to leave the gym.

“Come on, Goshiki. Don’t you pay attention to anything other than volleyball?” Shirabu scoffed in response, glancing at how gentle the giant of an ace was being as he sat down next to you. “That’s the Ace’s girlfriend.”

“Girlfriend?” Goshiki repeated, as if he hadn’t ever considered Ushijima having a girlfriend. And he hadn’t. Because Ushijima always seemed so devoted to volleyball, it didn’t really cross Goshiki’s mind that there could be something else.

“Now now, children,” Tendō laughed, wrapping his arms around the boys’ shoulders, grinning proudly, “If you’re going to gossip, at least get it right. Y/N is not Ushijima’s girlfriend yet.”

Ushijima couldn’t care less that the topic of choice for the team was his romance life. He wasn’t even really paying attention as their voices disappeared from the large gym. Although, he had wished they would be just a little more quiet since you were in fact, sleeping.

“Y/N,” he spoke gently, brushing your hair from your eyes slightly. His hand moved to touch your cheek, an instinct that he wasn’t quite sure where it came from, but hesitated and pulled away instead. “Y/N, it’s time to go home.”

You stirred a little at the comfort of Ushijima’s voice, mumbling something as your eyes fluttered opened. “All done?” You asked, a yawn interrupting you half way. 

A small smile tugged at Ushijima’s lips as he watched you, offering a hand to you and helping you stand, “I’m sorry you’re always the one waiting for me,” he apologized gently, rubbing the back of his neck as he watched you pack up your things. 

“I don’t mind, Ushijima,” you beamed up at him. “It’s not like you don’t do things for me,” you pointed out as you watched him grab your bag from you, always insisting that he help you carry things when he walked you home (even if you only had the one item).

The two of you left the gym, the rest of the team still lingering about and everyone wishing their goodbyes. You gave a smack onto Tendō’s arm as he laughed about you falling asleep, teasing you about being a baby who needed a nap.

“Is that really what you get when you’re the ace of Shiratorizawa?” Goshiki was gaping, a little starstruck over you. Sure, he had seen you around before but you just seemed a little too ethereal for him to think of you anything less than an angel.

“No,” Ushijima interrupted before Shirabu could, not even bothering to look at his underclassmen. “She’s one of a kind.”

Reon and Semi couldn’t help but laugh as Goshiki blubbered out an apology, hoping the ace hadn’t thought of his words as rude or anything, but Ushijima just walked away, clasping your hand in his as he said goodbye with you to his best friend. 

You should’ve been more surprised that Ushijima’s fingers were now interlaced with yours but it felt so natural that you didn’t realize that it was such a moment until you got home. The two of you spent the walk home talking about anything on your mind, you even managed to make him laugh a few times with how silly or dumb your thoughts were.

Ushijima gave you a small smile as he handed you your bag at your doorstep. And for a moment, he wondered what would happen if he just told you how he felt right now. But your parents called you inside and you eagerly waved him goodnight, sending him one of those adorable smiles you always seemed to save for him.

So maybe not tonight... but he would come back tomorrow morning with scribbled notes on his hand about things he wanted to say to you and a pastry or two because he wanted his confession to be as sweet as you.

haikyuu taglist (let me know if you’d like to be added!)

@al0ehas @aurumk @neko-chii1 @thisnoodlewritesao3 @satan-ruler-of-hells​ @trashy-simp​ @jeppiet​ @tobi-momo​ @darkvadeeer​ @haikyuutothetop​ @livy384​ @babyshoyo​ @jesssobs​ @b-bakana​

#akaashi keji x reader #kenma kozume x reader #ushijima wakatoshi x reader #hihqnetwork #kenma x reader #ushijima x reader #haikyuu x reader #haikyuu!!

[thedelusionreaderbitch]

Kanej x gn! Reader - Falling

A/n: So I know I haven't been posting lately and I'm so sorry! I have like 11 drafts (in my Tumblr alone) and I couldn't get any of them done and I don't know why! I also used the Dear Evan Hansen seen Did you fall? As an inspiration!

Warnings: TRIGGER WARNING!!! Suicidal reader, falling, heights, suicidal thoughts, mentions of death, language, I think that's it? You have been warned!

Summary: In a heist, you decided to let go

I do not own shadow and bone six of crows or its characters! I also do not own dear Evan Hansen because some of the dialogue came from that! On another note, I also did not make/do not own this image!

Your hand slipped from the ledge and then you were was falling.

Your know Inej had fallen many times, it's practically part of her job description. You had to make mistakes to get better so falling and tumbling was just how it worked, of course, she hadn't any more. Any of the stories she's told you have all been from the past. Kaz had fallen too, he jumped off a building and that's how he injured his leg, but you don't think any of their stories have lived up to this.

Your hair is flung back behind you, and you really have no control over your body. It should seem like your going down but that's not what it looks like, it looks like your floating up. You try and spread out your body so you would slow the speed you were falling at but it's no use.

You try and scream but at the rate that your falling it gets caught in the air and even that ability is taken away from you like so much air fills your lungs.

You don't close your eyes and try to imagine what your life could have been. After all, the only reason you weren't on the ground, safe with your friends was that you had just robbed and gotten Nikolai back Strumhond's ships. You might as well enjoy the view.

Luckily for you, there was a beautiful sunrise in the distance and the clouds seemed to be placed in all the right places like the framing around a picture.

Though it was ironic because it showed that life would go on after you died because death was inevitable for you wasn't it? Your life was just another spec in the universe barely even making a dent in anything.

A bitter thought comes to mind; at least you wouldn't have to deal with all the shit trauma you would have had to go through. The reason you had 'slipped' from the ledge was no coincidence.

The air around you started to get heavy and you could see the bottom of the earth coming closer and closer. It's then where you close your eyes and your mind forms two people - Kaz and Inej.

Your girlfriend and boyfriend would... Gosh, they would probably wreck the world till they found out who made you fall. Only their search would end up empty.

You didn't want to leave them like this, not really yet they had each other. Would good were you? You were always just an extra understudy, you were never good at something you were just... Average.

And why would you want to live in this saint's forsaken world any longer?

Mentally you brace yourself for the impact; you probably wouldn't even feel a thing. You were so high up that the force of you hitting the ground would make it so you would die on impact.

You don't. You don't end up hitting the ground the rough and welcoming grass and dirt of the earth signifying your end. Your freedom, no you find yourself face-first into a ginormous cushion on a flying boat.

Groaning you look around only to find that this is definitely Nikolai's (or Strumhond's) ship. And there were some frazzled-looking Crows coming right towards you.

Fuck. Fucking shit- Nope, nope you were not going to talk about this. No one needed to know! It was only a little high...

You had almost taken your own life.

The facts come full force at you and you have to calm your breathing so you don't have a full-on panic attack.

"Y/n!" Inej comes full force basically flying towards you as she leaps through the air as graceful as a cat and lands right beside you. Suddenly she pulls you into her arms and you have to remind yourself to embrace her because you feel so numb.

"I'm okay." You croak and it comes out a little teary but to everyone else, it had sounded like you were afraid of what might have happened but what you really were afraid of was what did happen.

Inej helps you off the cushion even though you are pretty sure you sustained little to no injuries. That thing was fucking soft.

"Y/n." It comes out shaky and your eyes meet Kaz's and they aren't lined with tears like Inej's but his voice wavers and holds the fear of the man who would do anything not to be scared like that ever again.

He limps over to you both and surprisingly pulls you both into his embrace.

This time you don't feel numb no - you feel fucking guilty.

Finally, all three of you pull away and when you meet Kaz's eyes again you know he knows.

By the Saints, this is just your luck today, isn't it?

"What happened," Kaz says slowly like he's talking to a child.

Okay, and that's why you didn't want to tell anyone because you weren't a child and you weren't making this shit up! He couldn't just undermine you because he thought you need some support 'that way!' That's not what you need!

It's not going to make it any better.

"I fell." You say crossing your arms taking a few steps back from Inej and Kaz.

"Kaz let it go." Inej's voice isn't light it's that commanding tone she uses to the people on her ship. She's never used that tone on us, sure maybe that mother tone but not that tone.

What's happening to us?

Kaz sets his hard gaze on Inej willing her to take a step back but she stands her ground of course she does.

Am I the reason we'll fall apart?

"Really? Is that what really happened?" Kaz utters and he turns his gaze towards you. It's hard and angry and he isn't Kaz Brekker or Kaz Rietveld anymore, he's Dirtyhands. And your just another opposing gang member he's trying to get information out of.

"Yes!" You shrink away from him becoming smaller and smaller till you hit the wall of the ship.

Inej seems to have caught on to what Kaz is assuming and she looks at you in surprise and shock.

"Y/n... No, no you can't have..."

"Why don't I believe you?"

You are pressed up against the wall now with Kaz and Inej in front of you, keeping you in your place so you don't or can't run away.

It was always meant to be Dirtyhands and the Wraith wasn't it? You were a fool for thinking they could ever love you. They would leave you wouldn't they? If you told them the truth.

Everything would be lost.

"I was... I was holding on!" You nearly yell like your trying to convince yourself that you didn't let go of that ship. That you almost won the war within yourself.

"Then I lost my grip on the ledge and I just... I was falling."

It's Inej this time who speaks and she gently places a hand on your shoulder.

"Did you fall or did you let go?"

The question hangs in the air and you see now that they weren't Dirtyhands and the Wraith, no. They were concerned, worried, and afraid they were going to lose you to yourself.

"I let go." You whisper looking down at the floor of the ship not bearing to be able to look them in the eyes.

You shove them out of the way but you couldn't just run away, it was a fucking flying ship for fucks shake! There was no getting away, and you didn't feel like flinging yourself off Nikolai's ship.

So you just stand by the railing as silent tears slowly roll down your face the only thing that recognized your suffering.

Out of the corner of your vision, you see two people come up beside you on each side. You don't say anything you don't even look at them, you just look on at the sunrise and how it's almost forming into a beautiful sunny day.

"I'm sorry." Inej whispers and you hesitantly takes your hand and you can't help but let her.

You look over to Kaz and for once in your life, all his guards are down and you can tell he's also sorry. But you could also tell that he was so, so afraid.

"Please don't leave us."

Its barely said yet you can hear it clear as day and he takes your other hand looking at you with pleading eyes.

Looking over to Inej her eyes held the same beg, the beg of forgiveness, and the beg of safety.

Your beautiful Crows.

"I'll try."

"That's all we ask." Inej states as she and Kaz move closer to you and you all look at the sun. And what's beyond.

Words 1463

-thedelusionreaderbitch

Shadow and bone taglist: @kaqua @rika90 @thefandomplace @musical-theatre-obsessed-dumbass @gallysonegoodlung @navs-bhat @sumsebien @dontjudgeabookbythecover @brekker-zenik @alohastitch0626

#kaz x reader #inej x reader #kaz x inej x reader #six of crows #poly kanej x reader #poly #shadow and bone #six of crows x reader #crooked kingdom #inej ghafa imagine #kaz brekker imagine #shadow and bone x reader #grishaverse x reader #x you #x reader #grishaverse #the grishaverse #fanfics #kaz brekker x reader #inej ghafa x reader #inej #kaz #kaz rietveld #kaz brekker #inej the queen #inej ghafa #nina zenik #falling #wylan hendriks #wylan van eck

[soobadnoonecanstopher]

Touch it for Real, Part 9

Genre: Humor / Fluff / Angst / (Eventual) Smut 18+

Warnings: OMG they were roommates / slice of life / slow burn / mutual pining / crude humor / cursing / virgin!baek / idiots to lovers / unresolved sexual tension

Characters: Baekhyun X You/Female Reader

Description: You teach Baekhyun how to date. (Basically the Get You Alone M/V)

A/N: DO NOT YELL AT ME! It is going to be okay. 

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5 , Part 6 , Part 7 , Part 8  , Part 9 , Part 10

You had a secret.

For such an abstract and shapeless thing you could sure feel it sitting in there.

It was pulsing.

Your secret felt like a splinter lodged just under a single taste bud that sat in the center of your tongue. You could feel your white blood cells attacking it, trying their best to push it up and push it out, but still it clung tight with its sharp barbs lodged within your cell walls. You brushed your tongue against your teeth.

The secret did not budge.

What you knew about them though, was that secrets did not like to stay hidden forever.

Your fork slipped and clanked noisily against the ceramic plate and the bright orange carrot ball rolled across the smooth white surface nearly sliding over the edge onto the white linen. Whoever decided that your steamed vegetables needed to be shaped into spheres simply for aesthetics should be forced to come out here and explain how you were supposed to spear one of these things while also avoiding the risk of it shooting across the table and hitting your date in the face.

Ben turned out to be very nice. If you were into tall, handsome, clean-looking, and responsible guys who drove their own cars and also had things like health insurance and retirement plans. When you first saw him, you were struck by the firmness you felt when he shook your hand and smiled brightly at you. He had all of his teeth and a head full of hair. He was definitely walking around on his real legs too. He looked like the kind of guy who didn’t let the clean laundry sit in the dryer for longer than a day and changed out his toothbrush every three months. You couldn't see a single fault.

You were trying your best to make a good first impression.

Really, you were.

Well, while also keeping an eye on Baekhyun who sat beside you with his focus down on his plate as he sliced his food into bite sized bits. His control of the fork and knife felt so careful and so exacting, it neared obsession. He had not ordered the steamed vegetables. None of his food rolled.

Across from him, looking just as cute in person as her online dating profile pictures conveyed, was Mia.

Mia was fine.

She was fine.

You didn't want to get into it.

Her clothes were fine. They were exactly the kinds of clothes you had expected she would wear.

Her hair was fine.

She actually had a hairstyle that reminded you of one of the characters in an anime you watched with Baekhyun once and you wondered about the upkeep costs of that particular shade of blue that streaked through her hair. You wondered if she had to switch to blue towels and blue pillow cases or if everything in her house was just stained forever.

Baekhyun’s cheeks blushed when he shook her hand and his smile was bashful, if not a bit tight when she complimented his glasses. Your mind briefly considered the plush, expensive white towels you both owned at home and a flash of horror overcame you for a split second when you imagined those towels streaked with a blue stain from the shower.

He bought those glasses at a store. Anyone can go to the store and buy glasses. Did such a superficial compliment really warrant such a deep shade of pink on his cheeks?

You took a sip of your glass of wine and the sweet, cool liquid had a tart aftertaste that lingered on your taste buds long after you swallowed and you stabbed roughly at the runaway carrot again, impaling it with the prongs of your fork.

Finally.

“I got it,” you said out loud to yourself with a wide smile and you held your prize up in front of your face for a second. Long enough for your eyes to drift across your table to meet Ben’s and you caught the soft amused chuckle that puffed from his nose.

You’d already gotten through the backstory. Starting with the curious question from Mia about how you and Baekhyun got to know each other and you took a quick glance toward Ben as Baekhyun explained that you and he had been roommates for a couple of years. You caught the slight smile on Ben’s lips as he looked down into his water glass and you wondered if he was pleased that he already knew the answer to this question as you had been quick to tell him this important detail about your life as you chatted with him during the last week or so.

Mia on the other hand simply let her eyes drift over from Baekhyun’s face to land on yours for a moment and you offered a disarming smile by way of explanation. Not that either of you had any explaining to do. You could live with whoever you wanted to live with. It took her ten seconds to return your smile, although you didn't quite believe it, or believe that she was done with her curiosities about this topic.

You couldn't really blame her although you’d given her nothing to be suspicious about. Not in the last 20 minutes since you’d all arrived and nibbled on shared appetizers, at least.

Hell, you hadn’t even touched him all day. From before you both arrived at this fancy restaurant and just relinquished your coats to some stranger simply because she held a hand out and sported a severe enough hairdo and manic look in her eyes that was too frightening to question. From the morning when you woke up and wandered into your kitchen to make toast for one and you ignored the sound of his feet shuffling in, half-asleep to grab a yogurt from the fridge. You hadn’t even helped him style his hair; which looked stunning, by the way, with the waves and the faded brown color that absolutely looked like something the perfect boyfriend would let you play with as he laid on your lap. He hadn’t even asked for your help picking out his outfit. He’d simply done it all on his own and waited for you by the front door wearing those jeans and smelling like that familiar scent that he bought for your date with him weeks back.

When had this all become so awkward? You’d never been afraid to touch Baekhyun before but now, well, the touches hadn’t ever concealed quite so much meaning before.

By the time the entrees arrived the conversations had moved on to hobbies and interests.

Ben was a movie buff, and his favorites were mostly mainstream blockbusters of the Marvel Superhero variety. He enjoyed many of the genres of films you’d mostly seen just the previews of. His top ten contained a bit more horror than you were comfortable with. One in particular, a prolific film based on a Steven King novel, had been the kind of psychologically terrifying film that made your chest rattle and you had spent most of the second half of that movie with your face buried in Baekhyun’s arm begging him to just describe to you what was happening and to tell you when the scary parts were over.

When he asked you what your favorite movie was you hesitated for a moment before pulling the movie Forrest Gump out of basically thin air. Yes you had enjoyed the movie. Yes it was something you’d seen more than once and if it was on television right now you would sit down and watch it from start to finish and you would enjoy it. It was a respectable favorite to have. It was the kind of favorite movie you would not be embarrassed to show to your grandmother.

But it wasn’t actually your favorite and you could feel the burden of Baekhyun’s eyes as he turned his head to look at your face when you said it.

Something about naming, out loud with your own lips — the light and fun, mindless guilty pleasure of the film that was actually your favorite movie that you’d watched hundreds of times and returned to watch again and again every time you felt even a little bit upset; something about saying it out loud to this table of people with countless of hours of media consumption under their belts and opinions about things like prolific directors, production companies, hefty CGI budgets, and overused, tired tropes that absolutely should be dropped in 2021, well it just felt too vulnerable for you to say out loud.

You swallowed a sip of your wine and refused to turn your head to look at Baekhyun until you heard the sound of his throat swallowing the ice water he sipped.

When Mia changed the topic to Anime you felt Baekhyun come alive beside you and Ben slinked back in his seat a little as the two of them got to talking about something that was highly anticipated and was slated to be released next year. Rumors about artists and directors with names you could not know flew easily from their lips and Mia mentioned the name of one previous work that you recognized.

In fact you had watched the entire thing last year with Baekhyun and you remembered talking excitedly about it with Mia during one of your early text conversations.

Your face lit up and you happily joined in, excited to finally know what in the world they were talking about when you accidentally let something slip when you reminded her of what she had said about the anime before. Luckily you stopped yourself before you could admit that you had actually been the one she had been chatting with at the time.

Still, she caught it. She was very quick and sharp and you watched her face as she registered that you’d referenced something that only Baekhyun should know about. Had you just fucked up?

“Ahh, we,” you raised your index finger and waved it lightly toward where Baekhyun had stiffened up in his seat beside you, “he told me about what you said.”

There was a moment when her eyes widened and she looked at Baekhyun briefly before returning her focus to you.

“He...told you about me?” She lifted a hand to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear, straightened her back and leaned forward with her forearms rested in front of her plate on the table. Her off-the-shoulders number dipped when she leaned in and you caught a bit of black lace and the bunch up of her impressive bosom.

She smiled a coy smile aimed across the table.

You followed the smile and your eyes reached Baekhyun. He’d been hit with the smile and had been too stunned to return it. Instead, he lifted a hand and rubbed it over the back of his neck twice before reaching the same hand forward to grab the ice water he’d been sipping all night as he pulled in a mouthful and puffed his cheeks before covering his lips with his flattened palm and swallowing noisily.

“I also mentioned you to my friend,” Mia said not quietly enough for it to be just for him and you dropped your eyes down to the half finished chicken on your plate.

She was fine. Mia was fine. She’d done absolutely nothing wrong. She was nice and she was probably a good person, but you kind of wanted her to die.

“So,” Ben interjected suddenly and you looked across the table at him as you tried to conceal the surprise on your face to find him sitting there.

You noticed he was done with his food and his plate had already been cleared away by the super attentive waitstaff.

The negligence of your own date weighed heavily on you and you angled your chest forward to face him directly for whatever questions he had for you.

He was pointing toward Baekhyun and Mia with his extended finger and raised eyebrows.

“You two work in computers?” It was a work question. He’d gathered this much from the brief introductions everyone had given and while you had failed to offer any insight as to what you did for a living, Baekhyun and Mia had both mentioned computers.

“He’s a software engineer, and I’m a programmer. Similar but not the same,” Mia explained. You weren't sure of any of the details or of how they were different. You hadn’t really put much thought into it. You knew Baekhyun worked the magic with the keyboard and could fix anything that you happened to break.

“I’m in advertising. Just got scouted by Comma Entertainment and I’ve accepted.” Ben had a hand raised to his chest and his eyebrows were up. This seemed important to him and you let your lips form into an impressed O shape as you raised your eyebrows. His tone and the way he said the name of his new employer seemed to warrant the excited reaction.

You weren't familiar at all with his industry but you knew how to react like you knew what he was talking about. He certainly seemed impressed by himself. Who were you to discourage his enthusiasm.

“You’ve heard of it?” You sold it too well. Baekhyun had leaned close to you and whispered an aside question and you shot him a tense look with your eyes as a warning, but you quickly pushed your smile wide for Ben who was, deservedly, very excited about his new position.

“Of course, who doesn’t know Comma for advertising. That’s a very big deal. Is that why you were so busy last week? We hardly got to talk.”

Your subject change was so slick. If you hadn’t been the one to do it, you’d have been impressed by it. The disappointed pout on your face sold it well.

“Actually I was at the bank a lot last week. It was so weird. I had a few accounts that seemed to be hacked but then it turned out to be nothing. Had to change all my passwords though, so that was annoying.”

“That sucks. They didn't take anything did they?” Mia spoke up from beside Ben; concern written all over her face.

“No. Whoever did it just seemed to access purchase histories mostly. Some loser of a hacker. Didn't even get any money.” Ben’s lips pulled wide and he was laughing with his head thrown back at his perceived victory over the hacker that had been messing around in his bank records.

“You can learn a remarkable amount of information about a person’s bad habits from their bank history, Ben. Sure utilities and rent; that’s boring. You can find out how often someone gets hammered at bars. How many of those bars are also strip clubs. How many maxed out credit cards they make minimum payments on each month just to keep their head above water. Their gambling losses and the motel rooms they book in the bad part of town…”

Baekhyun was speaking up beside you. You turned and you looked at his profile as he spoke so candidly and with what you could only describe as a certain smugness on his voice.

The only reason he’d stopped talking was to catch his breath. It was the most he had spoken all night and you honestly felt taken aback by the suddenness of his words and more, the topic he spoke on. It felt weirdly pointed. It just felt so detailed; almost accusatory.

“What?” You hissed the question; focused it hard and as under your breath as possible to the man seated beside you.

His lips closed up before his eyes turned to look at you and you caught a quick blink of his eyes that preceded a softening of his features that had no business looking that confrontational in the first place.

“I’m not saying any of that stuff applies to Ben.” Baekhyun lifted a slim dismissive hand to wave toward your date. “It’s just an example. For all we know Ben’s only weakness is eating fried chicken every day.”

Ben’s lips were pulled into a thin line on his face and his jaw unclenched when you looked back at him. Then he was smiling at you and it was bright and convincing. You smiled back at him and shook your head at your wacky roommate’s antics.

“Actually it’s pizza. You caught me buddy, I’m a hardcore pizza addict. Every night.”

“Well, not tonight.” Baekhyun shrugged with an odd smile landing on his lips.

Ben’s tight smile flattened and the two men seemed to be staring at each other for longer than you thought was polite for a shared first double-date.

“So what is it that you do?” It was Mia who ultimately broke the tension and you looked across the table into her eyes. She had a pleasant smile on her face and was still chewing on a piece of bread, clearly unbothered by the strange standoff that had just been going on between the two men at this table.

Surely you weren't the only one to notice how odd it had been. Had you just imagined the tightness in Baekhyun’s fist that laid over his thigh and the hard glare in Ben’s eyes?

With Mia’s question though, you felt your own lips pull closed and your eyes danced around the table to the other curious parties who also were now looking at you to answer the question.

You’d prepared well for this date. You’d made sure Baekhyun had the detailed first date topics, questions and answers for perfect small talk, even the section on table etiquette. You’d made sure he knew you’d be here to steer the conversations toward topics he was comfortable discussing and you’d even set up a safety signal he would use if he wanted to bail and just go home.

You’d planned it all out, down to the detailed progression of the evening and how at the end someone might even suggest going together for drinks. And should one of the dates wish to split off, it would be completely okay as long as the corresponding person felt comfortable. You’d even promised that under no circumstances would you abandon Baekhyun to do this on his own if he didn't want to. Not even at the behest of Ben, your date.

They were looking at you and you'd gone quiet. You’d been so busy preparing for this date that it never occurred to you that you were also actively involved and that someone might possibly ask a question about you and your work.

Your work. Well…

“Uhh...I don't really do anything worth mentioning.”

You felt it. It was a warmth that had pooled in the skin around your nose. Your cheeks felt warm and you felt just insignificant enough for it to take your undeserved confidence and throw it out the window.

Ben and Mia were watching you. You pulled your bottom lip in between your teeth and bit down on the dry chapped skin on the surface.

“Nothing?” Ben said and his eyes were wide with a look of confusion on his face.

“Well, not nothing.” You were not completely unemployed. You had been quite impressive before. You’d been working with the best publicists of an entertainment company and had been in charge of crafting and perfecting the asset sheets of many of your company's highest profile artists. You’d been the best at it and at one time had been highly sought out for your expertise. You had a way with it. You could work some real magic. You could make a dud of a raw potato sound like a five star course in a Michelin star restaurant. Losing your position in the spring of 2020 had really been a huge blow to your confidence. You looked back at how far you had fallen. Boring data entry jobs to make ends meet. Taking on weird side gigs so you could afford tiny luxuries like your favorite scented lotion or the name brand tampons instead of the store brand.

“I do have a job.” You added lamely. “It’s just not at all interesting.”

Ben dropped his eyes from yours and Mia shrugged her shoulders and stabbed a carrot ball expertly on the first try.

“Yeah but what is it?” Mia said as she chewed daintily. The heat in your cheeks spread and you let your eyes wander away from hers over the various dinner items that covered this table.

Beside you, Baekhyun’s movement caught your eye and you turned to see him place an elbow on the table in front of him and he leaned forward.

“She’s a dating coach. She’s really good at it, but much too modest when she talks about herself.”

Oh no. He wasn't about to spill the beans was he? This was definitely not something in the approved list of first date dinner topics. Wasn't this topic too incriminating? Wouldn't Mia put two and two together and figure out that you had been coaching Baekhyun all along? Also, wasn't this new profession of yours too brand new to start talking about so freely like this? What the hell was he doing?

“A dating coach? What’s that?”

Strangely, Mia didn't seem to be looking at Baekhyun with wheels turning and sirens blaring. She was looking at you with her mouth empty and hung open with a look of genuine interest in her eyes.

“Do you like, feed them what to say in an earpiece?” Ben was speaking up from the other side of Mia and you laughed at the absurdity of such a silly rom-com movie cliche.

“Well no. I’m not a pickup artist. I am a dating coach. Think about it like a sports coach. I am teaching my clients the skills to play the game. Skills to overcome dating anxiety, or I’m teaching them to identity and move away from self-sabotaging behaviors, limiting beliefs, or preconceptions that are detrimental to a healthy relationship.

I have clients that don't even know where to begin. My goal is to strategize with them and place them effectively within the dating scene so they stand the best chance. It’s incredibly hard to be objective about your own love life, but I provide an outside viewpoint. I step in and intervene when I see something that isn't in line with their relationship goals or the vision they have for dating.

I’m not teaching manipulation or just telling them what to say. There are no love spells to make someone fall in love with you. I’m changing the way they believe in themselves so they can present themselves to someone else in the absolute best way to begin a real relationship with someone.”

You’d been leaning in as you spoke animatedly with your hands. You felt the genuine excitement building with your words. You were surprised at how much of your previous profession’s language applied to this new exciting endeavor you were embarking on, but there really were tons of overlapping similarities between the two fields. The explanations just poured out of you.

You hadn’t said any of this out loud before to anyone but the more you talked about it, the more elated you felt about what you were doing with your life. With how much you had been helping Baekhyun and how much progress you had seen in just one day of helping your clients — Baekhyun’s friends Minseok and Sehun. Sehun had finally, finally sent you his first selfie that wasn’t taken from his lap after you’d sent him many examples of good selfies taken from different angles. Minseok was already halfway through the materials you’d sent him to study and had been working hard on identifying and changing the self-defeating language he’d used in his rough draft dating profile.

“She has an app.” Baekhyun piped up from beside you. He’d leaned back in his chair as you spoke.

Both Ben and Mia’s faces mirrored each other’s. Their eyes were wide and their mouths hung in amazement and you quickly closed up your own mouth and grabbed anxiously at your wine glass, feeling a little bit embarrassed about having talked so much. You couldn't resist the chance to smash their misconceptions about what your goals actually were with helping your clients. None of these people were unlovable. They were all worthy of finding someone and you were going to give it your all to help them see their own value.

“Not at all interesting?” Mia spoke up, “that’s super interesting. That’s really, really cool. Can—Can I have your contact info? I have a friend that would be interested in your services.”

“You have an app too? This is something we could advertise online. It would do extremely well on certain kinds of reddit forums and definitely in most online gaming communities.” Even Ben sounded excited, if not a bit overly judgmental, and you heard a quiet, but hostile scoff next to you.

You ticked your head toward the sound but did not turn to look at him. You knew that scoff well enough to hear the annoyance in his voice at whatever he thought Ben might be insinuating about online gamers and the connection to the incels that haunted the forums of reddit.

“I think it’s a bit premature to think about online advertising. I’m still only one person.”

Ben smiled and shrugged off your quick dismissal of his idea to partner up and advertise your business to the desperately lonely and pathetic gamers of the world. Hell, the more you thought about it, the less inappropriate Baekhyun’s annoyance was. Ben could use some coaching on choosing less insulting words.

Thankfully the dinner was over and the check had been taken care of. You looked away from the palpable awkwardness that slapped you across the face when Baekhyun waved away Ben’s card and paid for the entire bill with his own.

“You can get me next time, buddy.” He definitely said this word sarcastically. It was out of line and you simply could not find the right moment to pinch his leg under the table to get him to behave himself in a discrete enough way that would not get you caught by the other two people at this table.

You let it slide simply because you had no way to stop it. He was ignoring the way you waved your finger frantically at him down by your calf. You knew he could see you in his peripherals.

No, Baekhyun. Stop that. Be nice. Your hand was saying. He wouldn't even look at it.

The dinner was over and the movie was starting soon. You’d picked a restaurant that was close enough to the theatre that you could walk.

You paired off. It was far from natural. You actually caught Baekhyun’s eyes as you stepped quickly and walked ahead of him, falling into step beside Ben and you left behind Baekhyun and Mia to bring up the rear. It took every ounce of self control not to turn around and look behind you to see how closely they walked to each other. To see if Baekhyun kept his hands shoved securely in his pockets or if he swung his arms at his side as he walked, inching a hand closer and closer to Mia’s swinging hand in the hopes of a back of the hand brush of his warm skin against hers.

Your steps must have stalled. You’d reached the theatre and you looked up to locate Ben, only to find him at the box office purchasing four tickets for the movie you’d all agreed to watch days ago. For the life of you, you couldn't remember what you were seeing. You merely followed where you were led and found yourself seated in a center row of a movie house sandwiched between Ben and Baekhyun. You noticed the center armrests had been lifted when you arrived and simply did not bother to lower them since everyone was too full from dinner for any movie snacks or drinks.

The house was mostly empty and then lights dimmed as the movie began. You searched your brain and nearly pulled out your phone to check your chat logs for the name of the film but decided against shining a tiny bright light in a dark room.

The movie began and you were quickly drawn into the narrative. It was a dark film and as the soundtrack began to take on more sinister sounding tones you recognized that your heart was racing and you were feeling the tension all over your body. It was not a gorey horror film, but it was leaning more toward the psychological suspense thriller genre. Not really something you watched much of.

To your left, Ben sat completely still; focused only on the movie screen. He looked so calm and nearly unaffected by the terrifying things happening on the screen. He occasionally shifted in his seat but did not react to the jump scare that flashed before your eyes and made you flinch hard in your seat. You’d reached the point in the film when the main characters were in genuine danger and you began to wonder if anyone would make it out of this movie alive. Was this one of those films where everyone was doomed?

It happened again, another jump, another loud shocking sound and another noise startled you and you dove to your right, hiding your face in the warm shoulder of the man sitting beside you.

The realization was instantaneous. The second you felt the warmth of his arm, and the smell of him hit your nose, you pulled your head up and you straightened out your spine, mumbling a quiet apology to Baekhyun for using his arm to hide behind as you removed any and all contact points you had with his body. You angled your hips and your knees away from him and even went so far as to stick your hands well under your own thighs and keep them there so you didn't grab for him again. You had been doing so well by not touching him at all today. Why did it have to be a scary movie?

Things grew more frantic on the screen. You held your breath and tried your best to keep from reacting as much as you could. How long was this movie? How much longer did you have to endure this? You should have paid more attention to the details of this part of the date. This was your own fault. You were acting like a big baby because you couldn't handle a little frightening scenes in a movie.

It was coming again. You could feel it building. You closed your eyes and terrible sounds were erupting all over. You would just not look. You could make it through if you just didn't look. With your eyes closed the sounds felt louder than ever and when you thought you couldn't take it anymore you considered committing the enormous sin of getting up during the climax of the movie to use the bathroom just so you didn't have to sit through this anymore.

There was a shift beside you then. You felt warm fingers inching down your forearm, traveling the path your hand took that led below your thigh and someone was reaching for your hand and pulling it out from where you’d been sitting on it. Someone to your right was gripping your hand with his own warm hand and you opened your eyes to look down between the hidden space between your hip and Baekhyun’s hip. There, you saw the grip of his hand that wrapped securely around yours.

He squeezed down once and you followed the length of him up to catch a glimpse of the side of his face. He was looking up at the screen. His eyes were open and he did not flinch at all. He was so still aside from the occasional movement of his lips when he moistened them with his tongue.

You could handle this if he lent you a little bit of his strength like this. Your eyes returned to the screen but your mind wandered back down to the secure comfort you felt in his hand.

You felt your own secret throb.

It made you flinch just a little bit and Baekhyun’s hand shifted then. He moved, lifting the tight grip for a moment and you wondered if he was done, would he take his hand back and leave you cold and afraid again? The lift was for the shift of his fingers and you felt the push of each digit between yours. He pushed his fingers between yours; interlocking your hands together with his and his thumb moved lightly over your own thumb, brushing comforting strokes again and again through the loud and scary and shocking scenes that played over that screen.

This time the racing you felt in your chest had nothing to do with the scary movie. He was touching you. He was holding your hand in secret. It felt forbidden with his date sitting right beside him like she was and with your date seated right beside you like he was. All of your attention was down on the slow pressure you felt from his thumb as it traced the shape of your own thumb down from the very bottom up to the tip, around again. The simple up and down had a slow and sensual rhythm to it. When he lifted his hand his thumb moved and you held your breath to feel that same very slow touching trace the outline of the palm of your hand again and again. He drew absentminded shapes into your skin with the pointed tip of his thumb and your eyes drifted closed as the longing grew within you. He followed the paths of the creases in your skin like a palm reader. He did not even need light to see them, he simply felt them and traced along the paths.

You let him.

You felt bewitched.

You loved him.

The credits rolled on the screen and the lights switched on. The change was abrupt. You were taken by surprise and shocked by it like you were from the jump scares in the film.

His warmth left you. His wandering light touch, his deliberate and careful exploration of the lines that made up the palm of your hand vanished.

Everyone was standing and everyone was walking out of the theatre house and your mind felt clouded and dazed but you followed where their steps led and you found yourself standing outside of the exit doors with the three other people who you entered with.

Baekhyun stood beside Mia and Ben occupied the space of the sidewalk square that you also stood inside.

It was the end of a night. You felt an overwhelming urge for this evening to be done so you could go home and shower and maybe eat something sweet and distracting and maybe made out of chocolate.

“Well this was fun,” it was your own voice that ultimately called it.

Mia had been looking at Baekhyun who had been looking down at his own feet as he lightly tapped his foot on the concrete below. Three taps.

Tap, tap, tap.

You felt a jolt of realization. Baekhyun had just tapped his foot thrice on the floor below him well within your sight and you recognized what that meant. He was feeling done. He was done with all of this exhausting socializing and being out in public with so many people around and he wanted to go home now. This was him asking you for help now as he wasn't sure how to end the date but wanted it to be over.

“What about...grabbing some drinks, maybe...” Mia was talking only to Baekhyun as she looked at him, “if you aren't too tired.”

“Hey Baek, isn’t your grandmother coming over early tomorrow? Do you still have to get ready for that?” You interjected suddenly and Baekhyun looked up into your face with his mouth open and you watched his eyes move slowly over your face as he recognized what you were doing. You were giving him an out. Mia had asked him to go for drinks and you were giving him an excuse, should he need it.

You both knew his grandma came every other Sunday. You both vividly remembered the wonderful visit you had at the beginning of the week with her and she wasn’t due to arrive again until next Sunday.

He could simply correct you if he really did want to go with her. He could call you a dummy and tell you that you had the wrong week again and playfully tap you on the head to jog your brain back into functioning the right way as he often did when you got something mixed up.

“Oh, yeah she is,” Baekhyun grabbed your convenient reminder from the air and smiled a rueful smile directed at Mia. His smile widened with the wince on his face, “that’s too bad.” He added and Mia took it well.

She smiled and nodded her head and there were well wishes for a safe trip home all around as you all parted ways.

Ben said he would text you later. Baekhyun told Mia the same and you waited until they both walked away to follow Baekhyun back to his car for the quiet ride home.

The silence was heavy, but it was comfortable.

Baekhyun didn't speak at all and you could tell by the way he carried himself that he was tired. He wasn’t normally an extroverted person and found it very draining to carry on a full conversation with friends he knew well. Strangers like he had been with tonight, well, you could see the fatigue in his movements and you knew he needed something warm to drink and maybe some comfort with a familiar favorite tv show to zone out in front of.

You handled it better. You were used to having to go out of your home occasionally and you even enjoyed socializing with your coworkers on the few days you went in to the office for work. You felt a bit drained but mostly you were preoccupied with watching how he was handling it and you were also burning with curiosity to know how Baekhyun felt about the whole thing.

He’d wandered into the living room and he found the sofa. You followed him close behind and grabbed the remote, flipping to a familiar and funny cartoon that you often saw him playing in the background as he worked on things. He didn't usually watch it that closely but it was comforting enough to stay on and keep his mind occupied for a while.

You didn't speak. Everything you had to ask him could wait. Even the scolding you had for him about how he acted toward Ben could also wait. You’d let the man breathe a little first.

You busied yourself in the kitchen making two cups of hot tea and when you returned you found his head leaning against the back of the couch with his eyes still glued to the screen. He had a passive smile on his face and he reacted positively to the wacky scenarios the characters found themselves in. He would occasionally speak out loud, speaking along with a funny line he knew by heart and you found it impossible to resist saying the follow up joke. You knew this show as well as he did.

He accepted the tea with a smile and had a few sips and you set your mug on the coffee table in favorable of the comfortable side of the sofa, the side with the pillows that allowed you to rest your head comfortably as you watched the big tv.

You were feeling pretty good. Baekhyun had now officially gone on his first date with a real girl who wasn’t you and he’d had a nice time. You could see from where you laid your head down how relaxed his face was as he giggled at the show.

You stretched and you felt his warm thigh with your foot. This sofa was long enough for you to stretch out completely and you only barely reached where he sat at the other side. You wiggled your toes, unable to resist the light messing with him that you often gave in to and his hand reached down to grab ahold of your foot, which he held in place as he paid attention to the tv.

Your phone buzzed in your pocket and you sat up a little bit to pull it out.

You saw a text message from Ben.

From the preview you got the idea of what kind of text message the man would be sending you an hour after your first, and apparently your last date with him.

-Hey you seem like a super cool girl, but...

The preview showed you enough to know that he was dumping you before you’d even gotten anything started with him.

You opened the text. Your curiosity outweighed your sense of self preservation.

-...but whatever’s going on between you and your roommate, well it doesn’t really seem like there’s much room for me. I just don't think I can start something knowing I’ve already lost. Thanks for inviting me tonight. The movie was fun. Good luck with everything. - Ben

You felt the sting.

You couldn't help it. You’d spent all evening watching Baekhyun interact with Mia with every ounce of your self control devoted to not letting your jealousy show at all. At one point you’d been so damn engrossed in them that you forgot Ben was even there. What an unfair and shitty situation to have put him in. You quickly keyed out an apology for your crappy date etiquette and thanked him for going out with you tonight.

You couldn't even blame him for anything. He had been sweet and he had tried his best to be the perfect gentleman. What had you expected?

You sent the last message you would ever send to Ben and tossed your phone roughly toward the coffee table. It bounced but landed in the middle.

The racket called Baekhyun’s attention and he turned to look at you with his eyebrows raised in question.

“Ben just rejected me.”

Somehow saying this out loud to Baekhyun felt better than hiding it from him. It felt less miserable than keeping it inside of yourself and letting yourself suffer the sting of the rejection alone.

Baekhyun’s lips pulled into a small frown and he took out his cell phone from his pocket and tossed it roughly on the coffee table beside yours. It took a similar bounce and your eyes widened in surprise at the sudden gesture.

“No way, not Mia too,” you said in genuine fear and Baekhyun shook his head with his shrug still well in place.

“Nah, I just can't lay down with my phone in my pocket,” he said as he wiggled on the sofa trying to get comfortable, “though in hindsight I can see how you would think that, sorry. Mia hasn’t texted yet.”

He was wiggling, finding no comfort in all the positions he tried and you caught his wandering eyes for a second as you lightly tapped a hand over your belly.

This…

This would be fine. This was something you both did sometimes. Baekhyun said your belly was warm and comfy and made the best noises and he liked to use you as a pillow when he was just too tired to go to his own bed.

He moved right away at your invitation and you let your legs part around his chest as he laid his head down right on top of you. He turned his head to face the tv and didn't even squirm too much before he sighed out loud. His arms laid on either side of your waist and you felt the constriction as he lightly squeezed around you.

You really hadn’t gotten to touch him all day. Your fingers found their way into his hair and you felt a low moan from the back of his throat travel though your body as you raked your nails down the back of his head to his nape.

“Peanut,” you said softly, feeling every little bit of the annoying little tickle of that stupid secret sitting inside of you.

You could feel the heaviness of his body as he gave in and relaxed his muscles on you. You felt every breath he took and they seemed to be changing as you played with his hair and he gave in to the relaxing comfort you offered him.

“Hmm?” He replied after a long while. You angled your face and could see that his eyes were closed.

“How was the date? Was it nice?”

You had so many hopes for him. You were trying your best to ignore the pangs of your own selfish jealousy and get past it all to get to something good for him. Something that would make him understand how incredible he was. How beautiful he was inside and out and how precious of a human being he was.

“Mhmm, I liked it.” He said softly and he shifted and you felt him tighten his hold around your waist briefly before he relaxed again.

“Did you really? Do you think you liked Mia?” You kept your voice strong. You did not allow your fears to overcome your voice. You were okay with this if he was okay.

He did not answer right away. You’d stopped playing with his hair and you kept your hand rested over his head. He was so warm. He was so lovely.

“Do you want me to like Mia?”

No.

Mia would be so good to him.

You did not answer. Your answer would have been no. It would have been selfish. You’d just been dumped by your date, how dare his date have gone so well. You’d both been on the same date. You could still see the way she looked at him. She found him just as lovely as you did.

You felt a thickness at the back of your throat and you swallowed it down.

“I’m trying, Bug. She’s very nice to talk to. Do you think I should like her?”

Was this because of his mistrust of people? Was this his shyness about letting someone he didn't know very well in close?

You couldn't respond. You did not trust yourself to do the right thing.

“You should go rest if you’re sleepy,” you said, you know, like a coward.

It took him a few minutes of laying on top of you before he realized that you were right and he would be much more comfortable in his own bed. He nodded and pushed up with his arms, and his eyes stayed closed and his head stayed hung down as his feet shuffled and he made his way into his bedroom, leaving his door open you merely heard the loud sound of him plopping down on his bed.

You were stuck where he left you.

Stuck in about as crappy a mood as you’d ever found yourself.

You hated everything about this. You hated how much you loved him and you hated how receptive he was to the idea of dating Mia. You hated how she looked at him and giggled at his small jokes and you hated HATED the way his cheeks blushed and the shy smiles he gave her when she talked to him.

You laid there and you stewed in your mood for longer than was good for you and the only thing that made your it up was the simultaneous buzzing that brought both of your cell phones to life on the coffee table.

You reached for yours. It’s as your dating coach app. Baekhyun had received a new message from Mia. The feelings that surged through you were taking over your sense of what was good and what was right and what was proper behavior for someone like you to participate in.

You swiped to read the message.

-Hi Baekhyun. Sorry I couldn't wait until tomorrow to text you. I had an amazing time tonight and I was wondering if you would like to meet up tomorrow after your Grandmother’s visit for coffee? I have something I’d like to ask you.

You felt as if your body was on fire.

You could feel it deep inside your chest, deeper still inside your belly where his head had been resting moments before. You felt it in the palm of your hand where his thumb had traced the patterns of lines there. You felt it in your lips that he had kissed and in your tongue ached inside of your mouth from your stupid secret.

You reached for your phone. You opened the app for the power he’d given only to you and you responded to her message as if you were Baekhyun.

-Hi, Yeah, that sounds fine. I’ll meet you at 1pm.

Your hands moved on their own. You moved to the internal commands of your app and you deleted both of the messages from the chat history. When you picked up his phone you saw the notification for Mia’s message vanish before your eyes and when you unlocked it and accessed his chat log, there was no sign of the unimaginable and unforgivable sin you had just committed against him.

Part 1 , Part 2 , Part 3 , Part 4 , Part 5 , Part 6 , Part 7 , Part 8  , Part 9 , Part 10

Tag list: @j-pping  @blahblahblah-boo  @his-mochi-cheeks  @amyeonzing@littleflowercrown13  @baekinmylife  @insta1010  @nana-banana  @f4ncyvelvet@bbhbeth  @totallynerdstuff  @byunbabybaek @maijinki @bbyunz@theclawofaraven @kingkushdealer  @uhobob @baekswifey​ @punchmebaekhyun @xlxbaekhyuneex

#baekhyun #baekhyun fanfic #exo #exo fanfic #exo fic #baekhyun fic #baekhyun ff #exo ff #baekhyun scenario #baekhyun chaptered #baekhyun fluff #baekhyun angst #baekhyun smut

[amessywritersmind]

Hurricane - Randall ‘Pink’ Floyd

A/N:  I’ve recently re-fallen in love with the beauty of the movie Dazed and Confused, and there’s like literally no work for it so I decided to write my own about one of my favorite characters! It’s a friends-lovers type thing sooooo.... Enjoy ;)

I exited my car and walked towards the school entrance with a little more pep in my step today. Around me, I could hear the chatter and excitement of the kids scattered across the parking lot, a few more days and school would be out. Soon, a lot of them would be seniors, including me. 

As I was walking, I saw Pickford’s bright yellow car pulling in, Pickford and Michelle inside. Thank the lord! I smiled as he sped into the parking lot, walking over to the car and leaning against the window. 

“Ahhhh, Pickford! Just the man I wanted to see on this fine morning!” I said dramatically, smiling at him. He rolled his eyes putting the car into park. 

“Hey Michelle!” I said to her as Pickford turned the car off, looking over to me. She smiled back, laughing at Kevin’s reaction to me. 

“What do ya want now (y/n)?” He said in fake annoyance. 

I nudged him gently, laughing. 

“Light me, I left my lighter at home.” I said, pulling a joint out of my pocket and placing it in between my lips, leaning closer so he could light the end. 

“M’Lady” He laughed dramatically, producing a lighter and sparking the end. 

“Thanks man, you’re the best” You said standing back up right and smiling gratefully, taking a few drags off the thing.

“Yeah yeah, you only want me for my weed and my lighters.” He fake pouted dramatically, earning another giggle from me and Michelle.

“You know you love me!” I exclaimed, reaching in the window and ruffling his hair, much to his annoyance.

“Anyways, I gotta go find some people, I’ll catch you guys later!” I called, backing away and going to find some other friends. 

I took a couple drags off the joint, making my way through the school gates and saying hi to people I knew along the way. Mid laugh (at something someone had said) I felt the joint being pulled out of my mouth. I turned quickly only to see one of my very best friends, Randall Floyd, or Pink as we all call him. I smiled at the sight of my joint hanging out of his mouth, a smirk on his lips. 

“And what do you think you’re doing Mister? I chuckled, crossing my arms and giving him a look. 

“Well, you know what they say (y/n), sharing is caring.” He said jokingly, taking a big hit off of it. 

“Heyyyy!” I exclaimed, laughing and reaching for it. 

“Don’t smoke it all! I barely got a few hits in.” I pouted as he pulled it from my reach. He laughed and threw his arm around my shoulders, pulling me in and passing the joint back to me. 

“Fine, I’ll give it back Mrs. Grouch” He said, earning a nudge in the side from me.

‘You’re lucky I love you” I grumbled out, looking at him. He laughed. keeping his arm around my shoulder and walking towards the doors to the school. 

“So I was wonderin’ if you’re free tonight? Maybe you can drop by mine later tonight? I’ve got some new records to listen to and a sixer just begging for us to drink it.’ Pink said, as if he’d really have to coax me into coming over. I laughed at his ‘puppy dog eyes’ all the same.

“What, no plans with the leech tonight?” I joked around, referring to his ever annoying girlfriend. 

“Nahh, needed a break for one night” He said dismissively, earning a laugh from me.

“Alright, It sounds like a plan! Be there at 6?” I confirmed, stopping as we heard someone call Pink’s name. He waved to them to hold on before finally removing his arm from my shoulders. 

“Sounds great! Can’t wait.” He confirmed with a smile, turning towards me and stealing the joint again, taking another hit before passing it back to me. 

“See you then.” I called to him as he walked backwards, shooting finger guns my way and nearly tripping on his own feet. I laughed at how dorky he really could be at times. 

I took the last drag before putting the joint out and walking into the building, nearly running straight into Slater.  

“Slater! My man! How’s it going?” I said to him, doing the funky little hand shake we made up a few years back. 

“Good, man! Hey! I got that stuff for you.” He said smiling like a maniac, pulling a little bag out of his pocket and handing it to me. 

“You are the best my dude!” I laughed out, putting the baggie into my bag.

“Anything for you! Hey man, I’ll check ya later!” He said, shooting me finger guns and walking away. I really was friends with a bunch of dorks.

I sighed, continuing my walk to first period, now all I had to do was survive the day.

Later that day 

The final bell rung out, everyone including me rushing to pack their stuff up and get out. As I was walking out of the building I saw Slater, Pickford, and Michelle  hanging out in the parking lot over by Pickford’s car and decided to go say hi real quick. 

“Only a few more days dudes, and then we’re seniors!’ I exclaimed as I walked up to the group. “Hey Michelle, can I bum a cig?” 

She handed me one and lighter. “Thanks.”

“It’s gonna be so weird man, we’re gonna be like so....old” Slater said slowly, laughing after he realized what he said. I laughed too. I handed the lighter back to Michelle and took a drag off the stick.

“All I know is, we’ll be the top of the food chain, and i’m gonna throw a fat party to celebrate!” Pickford laughed, lighting up a joint of his own. 

As I was about to reply, I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist, lifting me up slightly before setting me back down. I let out a little shout, startled, holding my cigarette out to avoid burning whoever the culprit was. 

“Floyd! I swear to god I’ll kill you!” I said knowing it could be no one else.

“Oooooo, she used your last name. You’re in trouble, man!” Slater called out, laughing as Pink placed me down again and moved to my side, throwing an arm over my shoulder, as he usually did.

“Awe, look at the two love birds who won’t admit they’re lovebirds!” Pickford said mockingly, faking a gag at the end. 

“Oh shove it Pickford” Pink said dismissively, waving off the comment.

“Yeah, you wouldn’t want his toy to hear that.” I fake whispered to the group as they laughed along. I was referring to Simone and they all new it. They all new I couldn’t stand her, including Pink, and most of the group felt the same way.

“Alright alright, that’s enough of that.” Pink started, trying to keep the peace as always. 

“Look! It’s my favorite group of little stoners!” A voice called to the left, Donnie joining the small gathering, a chorus of ‘hey Don’s’ and ‘what’s up man’s’ emitting from the group. 

“Hey Don! How ya been? Haven’t seen you in a while.” I said as he reached the circle. 

“Still waiting on your call, baby.” He said winking and flicking his tongue at me. I heard Pink scoff at this from beside me, but I just laughed. Donnie was Donnie after all. 

“In your dreams man.” I replied smoothly. 

“Oh you know it sweatheart! Anyways, I’m here for you Slater. Where’s my drugs?” He called over to the stoner, who was currently passing a joint to Michelle. 

“Follow me, man.” He said with a guilty grin, him and Donnie walking away. 

“Well, as much as I love hanging out with you nerds, I gotta get goin.” I said, moving to walk towards my car. Pink hooked his fingers into the belt loops on the side of my jeans, pulling me back towards him. 

‘We still on for tonight?” He asked.

“Yes, sir!” I said feigning seriousness, fake saluting him. He laughed at this. 

“Alright then. I shall see you tonight.” He smiled, releasing his hold on the belt loops and backing up slightly.

“See you then. Later, guys!” I called over my shoulder and hopping in my car, the radio coming to life at full volume as the car roared to life. 

Today had been a fairly good day but who was I to lie, I was beyond exited for the night to come. I raced home and instantly started getting ready-showering and then getting dressed. I had a little more time to kill before I needed to head over to Pink’s so I took out the new goods from Slater and rolled a few more joints, placing 2 in the “Emergency” supply and packing the rest into my purse before slipping my shoes on and heading out. 

I eventually pulled up outside Pink’s house, only to see him and Slater talking out by Pink’s car. 

“Getting the party started without me, boys?” I smirked, making my way over to the little group.

“(y/n), man! It feels like it’s been forever since I saw you man.” Slater called, laughing almost nervously. Pink looked over at me as well, shooting me his award winning smile. 

“Slater, I literally saw you a few hours ago” I laughed, pulling him into a hug anyways. 

“My turn!” Pink exclaimed once I’d let go of Slater, holding his arms open wide with a little smile on his face. I rolled my eyes, laughing, but walking into his arms anyways, my heart skipping a beat momentarily. I just chose to ignore that bit. 

“So, what’re you doing here? Not that your company isn’t a pleasure, “ I started, looking at Slater. “but i thought it was just gonna be us tonight?” I finished, looking at Pink. 

“It is, he was just dropping off some supplies” Pink answered devilishly. 

“Yeah, don’t worry (y/n), I’m not here to steal your man time, man” He laughed out, beginning to step away.

“You wish Slater!” I said, blushing slightly. He just shook his head, beginning to walk away. The blush intensified even more when Pink put his arm around my waist, pulling me even closer. He was usually pretty touchy, but it seemed to be amped up even more tonight. 

“Thanks again, man. I’ll see you tomorrow at the Emporium?” Pink called as Slater was walking away. 

“For sure man! Have fun, but not too much fun, man!” He called back, making his way around the corner. 

Pink still hadn’t let go of me so I turned, putting a hand on his chest and laughing at his dopey facial expression. 

“Hmmmmm, seems like someone really did start the party without me” I laughed, pinching his cheek lightly, him swatting my hand away. 

“Ok maybe I smoked a tinyyyy bit, but there’s still plenty to go around” He said smirking and hooking his fingers into the front belt loops of my pants. I looked up at him, suddenly having an overwhelming urge to lean in. I snapped myself out of it though, if any of that was going to be happening tonight I’d have to be a lot more out of it than my current state.

“Well, why are we still out here then? The weed isn’t going to smoke itself!” I chuckled, breaking away from him and making my way into his house, directly to his room. 

I plopped onto his bed, leaning against the headboard as Pink followed me in, closing the door and lighting some incense to mask the smell. As soon as it was good and burning, I pulled out my freshly rolled stash, lighting it and taking a drag as Pink put one of the new records on the player.

Once it was settled, he turned towards me. 

“Hey now! Don’t be greedy” He laughed at me, launching himself on top of me on the bed, opening his mouth for me to place the joint in it. I complied with his wishes, sticking it in his mouth and leaning back with a smile on my face, his body still very much on top of mine. 

Eventually, he moved to a more comfortable position at my side. We listened to the records, back to back, giving our respective opinions on each of the albums, going through about 4 joints and 3 beers each. By the time the last song on the last of his new records rang out, we were fairly buzzed. 

“Well, that’s all of em. Now, what to do, what to do?” Pink stated, looking over to me with an idea in his eyes. 

“Have anything specific in mind?” I asked absentmindedly, more focused on the brightly colored poster on the wall. 

“I have an idea, yeah” He answered vaguely. I giggled lightly at his lack of explanation.

“Are you planning on sharing that idea with me or are you just gonna keep it locked up in that brain of yours?” I questioned teasingly, leaning forward to tap his temple lightly. He swatted my hand away with a laugh. 

“I’ll do better, I’ll show you!” He exclaimed, grabbing my hand and pulling me towards the window. I was curious now.

Before I could question his intentions further, he slid the window open and climbed out on to the roof, turning back and reaching his hand in the window, motioning for me to follow. I grabbed his hand and climbed out as well. He began walking towards the middle of the roof, my hand still clasped tightly in his own.

He sat down finally, pulling my arm along with him. I sat down quietly, leaning against his shoulder lightly. For a few long moments, there was nothing but silence. Pink stared up at the sky, lost in thought. 

“Whatcha thinking about?” I asked quietly, poking his side gently. 

“I don’t love her.” He answered immediately. 

“What?” I replied, taken aback by the question. 

“Simone. I don’t love her, I never did. In fact, we’ve been split for months, but she refuses to let me go. I don’t love her because..... well, because I love someone else” He laughed out almost incredulously, like he couldn’t believe what he was saying. Something about that statement sent a ping straight to my heart. 

“Well then, that’s ok! I’m sure this girl likes you back. Who wouldn’t? Don’t worry yourself too-” before I could finish my sentence, his lips were on mine. They moved in sync briefly before he pulled away. 

“It’s you. You are the girl I’m talking about. I think I’ve always known it’s you, I just never realized it.” He let out with no hesitation. As I processed what he was saying to me, my heart was dancing in my chest. This was not how I planned for the night to go, not that I’m complaining at all.

“I don’t think there's any question that I feel the same then?” I asked in a daze, still shocked by the events that had just transpired. Pink chuckled at this, shaking his head and wrapping an arm around me, pulling me closer. 

“No, I don’t think so. Though, I think I should double check, just to make sure.” He stated, a goofy smile finding its way onto his face. At that, he leaned down once more, placing his lips on mine once again. 

#randall pink floyd #randall floyd #pink #randy floyd #randall floyd imagine #pink imagine #randall pink floyd imagine #randall pink floyd fanfiction #randall pink #randall pink imagine #dazed and confused #dazed and confused imagine #dazed and confused imagines #dazed and confused fanfiction #90s imagine #90s fanfiction #kevin pickford #ron slater #wooderson #jodi krammer #mitch krammer #benny o'donnell

[zafirosreverie]

Can you make a Agatha x reader where Agatha accidentally blast reader with her magic and is unconscious but can here everything. And she can hear Agatha trying to wake her up but for some reason she can’t wake up so Agatha takes care and of her until she wakes up. But reader hears everything Agatha says to her. With a good and fluffy ending please. I love you work it gives me life🥰!!!!

Aww that's so sweet of you love! Thank you so much!

This ended up being longer than i intended but i loved writing it! I hope you enjoy it and that it was what you expected ❤

Warnings: angst but a happy ending

The day that time stopped (Agatha x Fem!reader)

Ah, shit. Well, you fucked up. 

You were making a cake for your and your girlfriend to celebrate your birthday (even when you knew the date didn’t matter in the current reality of Westview), when you noticed you were out of sugar. You rolled your eyes at the cliché of the scene, pretty sure it was Westview wanting you to play the neighbor that asked for sugar, but ever since you arrived at the town, you had no intention to follow Wanda’s script unless it was necessary and it involved a scene with Agatha. 

“If I’m going to play a character, I’m gonna be the lesbian neighbor” you once said to your girlfriend, making the witch laugh. Later, when Tommy and Billy started calling you and Agnes “aunts”, you winked at her and celebrated the promotion to “lesbian aunt”. 

Smiling at the memory, you decided to ask Agatha to magically appear sugar. You knew she hated when you asked her to use her magic for something so simple, but also knew she wasn’t able to say no to you, especially on your birthday. Never was, never will.

Smirking, you had gone to the basement, not really paying attention. Your mistake. The first rule of dating a witch is to always be careful when she was doing magic.

“Ags, can you help me with th-”  You stopped talking when everything turned black.

“Y/N!”

Agatha ran to you when you fell unconscious to the floor. She was making a spell that would allow her to knock out Wanda for a moment, enough to let her steal her magic and run with you. She was so concentrated that she didn’t hear your steps and your voice made her jump. 

“Y/N” she said again, gently moving you, trying to wake you up. You didn’t answer. That’s when she noticed her hands were still glowing and she gasped in horror. She used the spell in you. The spell that was meant for a powerful magic being, used in a human. 

“I’m fine, dear. But woah, if you wanted to have me on the floor, i know a better way” You joked, trying to get up. But you couldn’t. In fact, you couldn’t move at all. “What the- Aggie? A little help?” You said, or, actually thought. Your mouth wasn’t moving, and you couldn’t even open your eyes. “Oh. Oh no”.

You knew this place. It was your mind. You were trapped in your mind. Well, shit.

“Y/N, love, please answer me” You heard Agatha saying and you knew she was scared. You felt her magic wrapping around you, and a string pulling from the back of your mind, trying, begging you to wake up. But it didn’t work. 

Agatha felt tears begin to fill her eyes. Her magic wasn’t working. Why wasn’t it working?!

“Please, please, wake up dear” She whispered, pushing her magic harder.

“I’m trying!” You thought, starting to worry. If she couldn’t help, how could you get out of here? You didn’t want to spend the rest of your life trapped in your mind. 

“Hon, don’t do this to me. Please don’t” she begged, a little desperate. It broke your heart hearing her like that.

“I’m trying, doll, but i can’t.” You thought, wishing you could do something to make her feel better. You knew she was always afraid of hurting you with her magic, and you managed to convince her that it wouldn’t happen, but now, you weren’t sure how you’ll manage to calm her after this ended. At least, you hoped it would end.

Agatha felt the tears rolling down her cheeks when she realised her magic wouldn’t be enough to wake you up. She hated herself at that moment. How could she hurt you like this? 

“I’m so sorry love, please forgive me” she whispered, pressing a kiss on your temple, taking you in her arms and carefully lifting you. She used her magic to make the spell book follow her as she took you to your shared bedroom. 

You felt her put you in the bed gently, before climbing next to you. She put your head on her lap while she quickly turned to the book, trying to find something, anything, that could help you.

“I’m gonna fix this, love, I promise” you heard her say, while one of her hands caressed your cheek. It made your fears disappear, you knew she would never stop until she made you wake up. 

“It’s ok pumpkin, take your time” you thought, wanting to hold her hand. 

Agatha read as fast as she could, anxiety blooming in her chest. It has to be something she could do, anything. She cursed herself for not being more careful, she should have closed the door to the basement, she should have heard your steps. She should have waited to do the spell, and spend the day with you instead, like you asked. It was your birthday, for lord’s sake! 

“I’m sorry, dear, I’m so sorry” she mumbled again, knowing you couldn’t hear her, but needing to say it anyway. Her free hand going up and down your arm in an attempt to calm herself. Her heart stopped for a moment when she read the last part of the spell. 

Time. It was a matter of time.

“No” she whispered and you worried. “Wait? That 's all?! I can’t wait!” she growled and you felt her throwing the book to the other side of the room. You would have jumped if you could. Agatha sighed and turned to you, gently touching your face. She knew the book was right, she just had to wait and pray for you to wake up soon.

“I should have listened to you” she whispered in your hair, pulling you closer to her “when you asked me to spend the day with you, I should have taken you in my arms and carried you to bed again. Even better, I shouldn't have even got up. I should have keep you with me” 

Your heart melted at her words. When you woke up that morning, you had covered her face with small kisses, waking her up too. You giggled when she pouted at the early hour and you reminded her it was your birthday, kissing her again before pulling her over you. She had chuckled and joked about you wanting her at all times. She wasn’t wrong.

But when you asked her to spend the day with you, she sighed and told you she had to practice the spell so she could be ready to steal Wanda’s powers. It made you pout, but you understood that she had more important things to do. Agatha promised you to spend the rest of the day with you after she was done. Too bad you weren’t that patience and fucked it all up.

What a way to spend your birthday. Trapped in your mind while your girlfriend was having a crisis trying to wake you up. Great, just great. 

“If any ancient and mystic force is listening, please don’t take her away from me” She whispered suddenly, hugging you tighter.

When she was a young witch, her mother and the rest of the coven would often say there were other forces, stronger than witches, and that they’d help them when their magic wasn't enough. But she never believed that. For Agatha, a witch that relied on other than her magic, was weak and not worthy of being a witch at all. 

That was until she met you and she was afraid of her magic for the first time. You were just a human, but you meant the world for her and her magic could be too much for you to handle. A witch afraid of her power was a dangerous thing.That’s why she didn’t tell you she was a witch until you made clear you were serious with her. 

It was a huge relief when you looked at her with wonder in your eyes after she told you. She was afraid you would be scared and run away from her, but you had been eager to be part of her world, to learn everything she had to teach you, to understand and support her. She loved you more than anything.

Except power. A voice said in her head, making her feel guilty. Her hunger for power made her often leave you alone for days, even months. She never thought too much about it because when she came back, you were always there, waiting for her. You never complained about it, never said you felt alone, even when she saw it in your eyes. You never tried to change her. 

And it hurted her heart, realising how much you loved her. You didn’t say it out loud too often, but you were always making small things to prove it. And she took them for granted. But now, she saw how little she did for you, how small it was what she gave you, when you always gave her the world. Your world.

“I’m so sorry” she cried again, kissing you softly “I promise i will never leave you alone again, love. I promise i will give you everything i have, everything i am”

You frowned in your mind. You were heartbroken. You didn’t want to hear her like that.

“You already did it, Aggie” you thought “You give me all I want everyday you share your world with me. Every time you answer my questions, no matter how simple they are, when you allow me to watch you do magic, when you hug me, every kiss you give me. That’s all i want, and you give it to me everyday”.

“I’m so sorry i make you wait for me for too long” she said, unaware of your thoughts “It isn’t fair for you, I shouldn’t take your presence for granted” her tears falling to your face as she kissed you again.

“Please don’t cry, love” you begged on your mind. Stupid spell. Then, you remembered watching a documentary when you were alone in a hotel room, waiting for her to return from a reconnaissance trip.

It was about how human’s mind can be powerful and even made some people recover from serious injuries. At that moment, you laughed and thought it was a silly idea, but hearing Agatha like that, was enough to try anything. 

“I don’t deserve you” you heard the witch whispering. She sounded so broken. 

“Ok, that’s enough” you thought and tried again to move. Nothing.

“You’re too much for me” she mumbled.

“Okay, mind. You and I are not understanding each other. Either you help me here or we're going to have serious problems.”

“I promise i will do anything to be worthy of you” one of her tears fell into your own eyelid. 

“WAKE UP!” You thought, desperately “She’s crying! Just wake up, god damnit” You yelled on your mind. But Agatha’s magic was strong and you couldn’t move. It seemed like whoever made that documentary, never met a powerful witch.

You sighed and wanted to cry. But you couldn’t even do that.

____________

Agatha spent all day crying and hugging you, apologizing for what she did to you and promising you she would never use her magic around you ever again. You wanted to tell her it wasn’t her fault and the fact that she wanted to hide what she really was, broke your heart. 

You couldn’t know how much time had passed, but you were sure it was hours. When you felt Agatha changing your clothes gently (with her own hands, not her magic, you noticed), you knew it was night already. You spent your birthday trapped on your mind because you didn’t want to play your role and ask for sugar.

“Goddamnit Y/N” You scolded yourself.

You felt Agatha taking you in her arms again after she changed herself too. She pressed a kiss on your temple and you knew she didn’t stop crying all day. You were sure she didn’t even eat anything. God, it was a nightmare.

___________

Days passed and you were still unconscious. Agatha was so scared and tired. She barely slept and didn't even eat properly. She didn’t want to be away from you for too long, in case you woke up, but her hopes were always shattered when the night came and you didn’t wake up. It all felt like the same day, as if the time had stopped for her.

She didn’t go downstairs. The living room was still decorated with everything you had put for your birthday. At first, she told herself that she didn’t clean anything because you would be awake soon and you two could celebrate. But deep inside, she just wasn’t able to look at the decorations without getting to her knees and cry. She felt so guilty. 

“She just wanted to spend the day, her day, with you Agatha” she scolded herself “You couldn’t even give her a single fucking day” she said angrily. 

How could she claim to love you when she couldn’t even put her hunger for power aside? For just one day? She swore that the moment you wake up, she will take you and leave this hunted town. She will never let her own selfish wishes get between you two ever again. 

“You’re lying” The voice in her head mocked “You know the moment you get the chance to get more power, you’ll put her aside again. You won’t even keep the promise of leaving this place, not until you get that magic”

Agatha gasped when she finally noticed the voice her head was making up. It was her mother’s. She felt herself hit the floor and rested her in the wall, her tears rolling down her cheeks again. She already lost count of how much time she has spent crying in the past days. Much more than she has ever done, that’s for sure. 

It felt like the puzzle of her life was missing a part, and that was you. You were the piece that made her chaos make sense. And she was so lost without you. 

“Aggie” a soft whisper said, too low she almost didn’t hear it. She stood up quickly, but didn’t move. It wasn’t the first time her mind played tricks on her. She had heard your voice a few times, but everytime she ran to your side, you were still unconscious. Not sleeping well was taking its toll.

She was about to sit on the floor again, when she heard the whisper again.

“Aggie”

She didn’t want to get her hopes high again, but she also didn’t want you to wake up without her right next to you. You had already spent too much time waiting for her. 

You groaned when you felt yourself moving. It started subtly, your fingertips tapping on the bed, then your ankles shaking a little. It felt too good having a body again. You couldn’t say it was an awakening, because you’ve been aware of everything the whole time and you actually didn’t sleep at all. It seems like sleeping was for the body, but the mind was always awake, you just weren’t conscious of it.

Being “awake” for days wasn’t as tiring as it sounds, but it was a nightmare because it meant that you were aware of everything. You heard the birds outside your window, you felt the sun on your face, you heard people outside the house. The world kept moving without you. 

But the worst part was hearing Agatha breaking.

You heard all the words she said to you, all her fears, her guilty. You heard the promises she made, the desperation in her voice. You felt how scared of even touching you she was, thinking she would hurt you even more. But hearing her cry until she fell asleep, everynight, too broken and hating herself, god, it was too much. She cried like she never ever cried before, prayed for what she never prayed for. She struggled with heartache and fear. 

Agatha didn’t know, but you made promises to her too.

You promised to be more careful, you promised to always listen to her warnings, to be more patient and wait for her to finish her magic stuff. To always knock on the basement door and wait for her to tell you to come in. But above all, you promised to tell her how much you loved her, to hold her in your arms and do everything you could to make her feel better. You just wanted to erase her pain and guilt.

So, when you finally got your voice back, the first thing you did was calling her name. The syllables felt so good on your tongue. The rest of your body wasn’t awake yet, you couldn’t even open your eyes, but you didn’t mind. You called her, knowing she was always near you, so she would hear you, she had to.

“Aggie” you whispered again, and not even a second later, you heard her footsteps in the hall. She opened the door quickly and almost threw herself to the bed, taking you in her arms.

“Y/N?” she asked softly, staring at you carefully. Her heart stopped when she saw a small smile on your lips. You were awake. You really were awake.

“Hiya, SugarPlum” you said softly, slowly opening your eyes. There was no way in the world you would miss the smile you knew that was blooming on her beautiful face. 

Agatha sobbed a little and smiled at the pet name, while you finally, finally, opened your eyes. 

“Y/N” she whispered, praying this wasn’t another of her dreams.

“Shh, it’s me, I’m here” you assured her, slowly lifting your hand and caressing her cheek. 

The contact was all she needed to finally let herself go. She cried again, but this time, it was full of happiness. She hugged you tightly and kissed you. You happily kissed her back, happy that your body decided to fully wake up at that moment. Without missing a second, you pulled her over you. Agatha giggled a little, but the tears were still rolling down her cheeks. 

You wiped them before you kissed her again. God, how much you missed kissing her. It was different from when she traveled, because this time you were right there, but you couldn’t do anything. 

“I’m sorry” she whispered, hiding her face on your neck “I’m so so sorry”

“Shhh, it’s ok love. It wasn’t your fault” you said, rubbing her back.

“It was. I shouldn’t have-” she started but you have heard it enough when you were trapped.

“leave me behind. Or pushed me. Or taking me granted. Or should have listened to me and spent the day with me” you said, having memorized all her regrets.

Agatha looked at you, confused. You chuckled and caressed her face again. 

“I heard it” you confessed “i heard it all, Atha” 

“You could hear me” she whispered, but it wasn’t a question. You nodded and saw how her face changed between confuseness, happiness and shame. You heard everything?

You giggled, making her look at you again.

“Everything, my love” you said and kissed her again “but let me tell you something. You don’t have to stop using your magic around me. You don’t have to give up who you are for me. I love you, all of you”

“But i- i wasn’t fair to you, i left you and-”

“You didn’t. Everyday I get to be by your side, proves to me how much you love me. Dear, I waited all my life to meet you. Some hours, days, months, doesn’t matter. Because I know you will always come back to me.” 

Agatha was speechless, so she did the only thing she could. She kissed you agains, with all the love she had for you. 

__________

The next day, you two sat in your garden, eating the cake you made, both of you covered in flour from the little war you had in the kitchen. You kissed her cheek and she wrapped an arm around you. 

“I’m sorry i didn’t get you a proper gift” she said and you pressed a finger on her lips. 

“Nope, no more apologies. You promised” you said and she smiled, kissing your finger. “Besides, i don’t know about you, but i think not dying was a pretty good birthday present” 

“Don’t even joke about it” she warned you and you giggled “I’m serious, Y/N” 

“hmmm, add ‘Harkness’ to the last word and you have a deal” you winked and laughed when she blushed. 

You really loved your witch.

#x reader #reader insert #imagine #agatha harkness #agatha harkness imagine #agatha harkness x reader #agnes imagine #agnes x reader #kathryn hahn #marvel #agatha harkness x you #agatha harkness x y/n #request

[binniesthighs]

dakimakura | reader x jisung

Pairing: self insert, female reader x han jisung 

Genre: smut, pwp 

Tags: softsub!jisung, harddom!reader, friends to lovers, pillow humping (m), masturbation (m), cumshot, begging, piv cowgirl, praising, dirty talk, corruption kink (f & m), degredation 

Word count: 2.4k 

Inspo: i blame you @jisungsplatforms (but I also love you *mwah* hehe thank you for this inspo! the realest friends introduce you to new kinks lolll) 

When the lights turn off, or in the dead of night, Jisung can’t help himself. 

How can something that feels so good make him feel so guilty? 

It had been a gag gift from some holiday or birthday--he can’t remember at this point. Sure, he thought that it was real funny at the time--what was even funnier to him was the fact that one of his friends had actually seen the thing, thought of him, and then spent money on it. Their loss, not his. 

By comparison, it wasn’t much larger than he was. Jisung knew that the large, body sized pillow could fit him well and he could fit it smushed onto his twin sized mattress when he pushed it up against the wall. It could almost be like it wasn’t even there. 

Jisung didn’t even know the character’s name, but he had tried to look it up once. The search yielded no results and he gave up easily after that too. All that he knew was that she must have been from some sci-fi thing--the very kind of anime show that he didn’t often watch. He really was one for the softer, cuter, more romantic ones that would leave him wanting something like that. 

She had red hair and a red outfit that had been illustrated to look as if it shone. She had cute features: a thin waist, a tiny nose and a pleading brown eyes with fingers hooking into the waist of her pants suggestively. Her thighs were perfectly shaped; unrealistically so--as they often were. Naturally, her breasts were humongous: a stark contrast to the rest of her body which was thin and lithe. 

The other side of the pillow, or the the side which he kept face down, ridded her of all of her clothes. The character wore baby pink lingerie which was nearly sheer. It left little to the imagination: her perky nipples protruded the fabric, and her glistening pussy slicked wet on her thighs and between her hairless folds. On top of it all, her orange hair had strewn everywhere onto the mattress-like image she was placed on, and her tongue dripped with in saliva that dripped down her neck. 

“Real classy.” Chan had called it. 

Jisung said that he was going to throw it out after it spent one night in his room when he was too tired from the festivities. 

He had heard that these things were comfortable, so he didn’t see the harm in trying. 

Jisung wrapped his leg around the body pillow to cuddle it, and the action itself was embarrassing enough to send a blush to his cheeks. The large mass did feel comforting, like another body in his bed which had only even been home to him. In the dark of his room, he could barely see the design, but knowing that it was there was something else. To save himself even further shame, he flipped it to the side where she was clothed. Even though no one had seen him do so in his sacred single-room, he still felt a cringe creep across his mouth. 

Just once. Just once I’ll look at it. 

He promised himself before turning the pillow over. 

Sure, her breasts were gorgeous: perfectly plump looking and doughy to play with...just as he had often fantasized about. His mind wandered to even more crude thoughts: what would she taste like, how would she sound if he had fucked her: would she be loud of soft? Would she be tight? 

Between his legs, he felt the heat rising, and jerked his hips at his wandering thoughts against cushion of the pillow. 

The blankets of the bed shifted, the frame creaked, then he found himself looming over her orgasmic face and all he could do was run wild with even more questions. Perhaps she would be soft, she would squeak, she would mix his name with her moans. 

Jisung straddled with pillow in his boxers and sighed out at the pressure of his hardening erection against her waist. He rolled his hips once, twice, a third time... 

“F-fuck...” 

He pressed his full weight against the pillow as he wetted the insides of his underwear with his dripping tip. His shaking fingers clawed out at the corners to hold himself steady, and with his unstable breaths he looked down at her. Tiny and stifled moans bit at his lip where he rocked his hips, slowly growing addicted to the friction. 

“F-fuck.” He cursed to the empty room again.  

Jisung didn’t know that he would enjoy edging himself so much, but with that first night, he was learning plenty of new things. 

After all, the pillow didn’t end up in the garbage, but rather the laundry. 

~🌹~

You had known of his little secret. 

While Jisung had thought that he could keep himself quiet, the steady creak of his bed during the late hours of the night gave him up obviously. 

You thought that it was cute. 

In fact, you had often imagined what he would’ve looked like desperately grinding himself over that pillow until he could take no more, or how he would milk his cum all over fabric and let it string between his fingers. Some nights, he would even go for more than one round. He must’ve been so agitated, so untouched, that he could do something like that to himself. 

You wanted to see it. 

The floorboards betrayed your steps to his room where the thumping had started near the hours of 2 or 3 in the morning. He had even left the door cracked open a little; as careless as he was. 

From the other side of his door, his breathy little moans were unbelievable. The fact that he could do something to himself was remarkable. He could work himself up to the point of overstimulation all on his own, and he would do it multiple times. 

“Mm.” He whimpered out, and the sound of his sheets crinkling followed. 

It was undeniable that you felt a similar heat below your waist, and it wetted your panties and clit so obviously it ached for you bring a touch for relief. Your thighs rubbed together to find some kind of sensation, but you wanted to wait the longest you could. You would save it all for him. 

“Jisung? Are you still awake?” You asked softly with a knock on the door. 

He scrambled with a tiny yelp and the sound of the pillow getting thrown to the floor poofed. 

“I can’t sleep, I’m coming in.” 

He had done somewhat of a good job covering it up...if you had ignored his discarded boxers also on the floor. Jisung pulled up his blanket all the way up to his nose. The light from the hall flooded, and you could still see the rosy blush to his cheeks. 

“I-I’m awake. Come-come in.” 

“You okay?” You asked, trying not to eye the evidence on the floor. 

“Yeah! Yeah! A-HEM! Yeah. All good here.” 

Under his thin sheets, his legs wiggled and you wondered if he had been close, and if you had just ruined his orgasm. 

“What can I help you with?” He timidly asked with legs still impatiently twisting. 

“Oh...I just couldn’t sleep, so I was wondering if you could help me?” 

His eyes widened, “How so?” 

“Well, for starters, you could show me something.” 

“Show you?” Jisung’s nervous eyes flicked from you to the discarded pillow, which had embarrassingly even landed on the scantily clad side. 

“I hope that I didn’t interrupt you.” You teased him further with a growing grin. 

“I-interrupt me? I wasn’t...I wasn’t doing anything? I was sleep--” 

“--Jisungie, I think that the both of us know that you definitely weren’t sleeping.” 

Jisung stammered, and you could tell that he had tried with all his might to not look back down at the pillow. 

“Was-was not? I was sleeping.” 

You strode confidently over to the rejected pillow, not even surprised to feel that it had been lightly wet from some kind of body fluid. You waved it in his face with an even more smug grin. 

“You’re terrible at keeping secrets Sungie. You don’t have to be so shy about it. Not when I know already.” 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about!” He said, becoming defensive.  

“Don’t pretend like you fuck this cute little pillow of yours and ruin it. I’m not blind Jisung. Also...there’s no shame in that...” 

“I do not!!” 

“If you don’t then would you like to explain why I can see your cute dick bouncing under this blanket?” 

Jisung yelped out even louder and threw his hands down his body to cover the obvious area, nearly hitting himself at the same time, then hissing out at his sensitivity. He shied, finally realizing that he couldn’t hide it any more. 

“...It’s embarrassing.” 

“Awww you’re so cute Sungie.” 

“Can you not tell anyone?” 

You laughed, “I think it’s a bit late for that. If I know...likely everyone else does.” 

“Ah shit.” 

“I could...help you, if you’d like?” 

Jisung appeared to crumble into a shy little ball. “What do you mean? This is embarrassing enough.” 

You asked permission to peel the sheets back, and he let you do so with a shocked little glisten to his big brown eyes. It was just as you had expected: his cock was pink and hardened furiously with his tip that flared and bubbling with precum. It was deliciously thick with a considerable length, the kind that you knew would’ve felt amazing in your throat. 

“Look at you...so worked up...you did this all yourself?” 

Jisung nodded with his face in his hands. 

“I-I can’t help it sometimes. It just feels s-so good.” 

“Can you show me baby? Show me how you grind into this pillow of yours? Wouldn’t that feel nice?” 

You brought the redheaded anime girl back to his bed which he peeked at through closed fingers. 

“When you look at her, what does it feel like? You wish that you could fuck her? Feel her warm pussy around your cock that only gets tighter and tighter...”

Jisung whimpered at your coaxing and nodded to every word. “ ‘Want to know...want to know what it feels like...” 

“Show me how you do it Sungie, cum all over your dirty pillow for me, soak it. Ruin it.” 

The adorable boy nodded, then shifted to straddle it once more now facing you. He swam in his oversized tee, and he was looked just as soft as you had expected. 

“L-like this?” He said, sinking over the cotton with his throbbing dick. 

“Just like that baby. Keep going.” 

Jisung dug his fingernails into the pillow as he thrust over it and flicked his hips nearly directly over the character’s waist and stomach. He couldn’t meet your eyes at first, but focused only on the way that he fucked it, but as soon as your praises started to fill his ears, he wanted you to watch him. It felt pathetic, but he loved it. 

“That’s it Sungie. Does it feel good? Fuck, look how cute you are. You’re that desperate that you would fuck this pillow? You want to know what it feels like?’ 

“Mm-yes.” Jisung muttered with even more broken gasps, “W-wanna know...what it feels like...inside...please--” 

“If you cum for me first, maybe you can find out.” 

Jisung looked up to you, pleading.” “R-really? You’ll let me?” 

“You want to fuck me Jisungie?” 

“Fuck--yes.”  The small boy nearly growled. 

“Cum for me first.” 

He huffed out in his focus, but nodded, while thrusting his hips harder. 

Everything about him was a sight to behold that sent your arousal straight to your clit which twitched just for him. As badly as he wanted to fuck you, you wanted to fuck him too; fuck him until he couldn’t make sense of his words, or until he had begged you to give him a break. 

Jisung continued at his face, and the longer he went, the more whiny his moans became. Pre-cum pearled at his tip which turned even redder against the fabric, and his back arched when he found an angle that he preferred. When he got closer, his eyes screwed shut, and his eyelids fluttered when he brought out his orgasm. 

“F-feels really good...” He said with a tiny euphoric smile. “C-close.” 

“Cum for me baby, just like the dirty baby that you are fucking that pillow. Is your dick that desperate to feel a cunt? This is the best that you come up with?” 

As your words turned dirtier, Jisung appeared to loose himself further, groaning out louder, and drawing his hips in deeper and collapsing over the length of the pillow. 

“M’ gonna cum, f-fuck, please wanna feel you, so, so bad.” 

“Prove it.” You challenged him further. 

With a strained little grunt that was much too cute for his own good, Jisung came over the design of the anime girl on his pillow, and he splattered her with white. His whole body shook with his high, and he shivered as he milked himself over her till his dick twitched with nothing more left to give. 

He gasped out and looked to you for approval, which you gave him overwhelmingly seeing the way that his thighs even trembled too. 

“Did I do good?” He asked while jerking himself further, not even caring that it made him flinch. 

“Of course you did babyboy.” You praised, and leaned over the sticky mess to give him a quick kiss. “I’d make you go longer, but I’m feeling impatient.” 

Jisung watched when you striped your bottom half of your sweatpants, and nearly drooled seeing you dip your hand between your folds to rub slowly at your swelling clit and swirl your fingers with your own cum. 

“See what you do to me Jisungie?” 

He nodded vehemently and threw back his beloved pillow to make more space for you. 

“Oh my god...this is really happening.” He whispered out. 

Your hand slid over to his dick lathered with his cum and you twisted around it with your own hand, then roughly toyed with his slit. After, you took your own slick to mix and rub around his length. He collapsed to his back overcome with the pressure from your hand. 

“Oh god.” He hushed with legs still trembling. “Please fuck me, I-I can’t wait...hurts...”  

“Oh I will Sungie.” You returned, and positioned your hips over his, and teased at your entrance with his pink head. “It’s my turn to ride now.” 

~🌹~ 

Bunch of (Ro)ses! 

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[a-lockman5]

Things were different now Pt. 3 - Happy to Help {Devi and Paxton}

A/n: as usual, I don’t own these characters, but I love them. This continues to follow the timeline I initially wrote so it does not coincide with season 2 at all. Paxton is a 17 year old with feelings, not a 10 year old before puberty… I hate proofreading so if it’s awful, apologies. Umm… so sorry it’s a year late.. and honestly, I kinda hate parts of it, but here we are nonetheless. Hope you like it!

Warnings: fluff, angst, phobias, I think that’s it.

Part one, Part two

Don’t forget to check out my Masterlist!

“Hey, baby,” Ben greeted her in a sing-song voice.

“Morning, Ben,” Devi replied as Ben laid a kiss to her cheek, and took the seat next to her.

“Why didn’t you come by for breakfast this morning?” he asked.

Devi felt her eyes grow wide momentarily. She had been going to Ben’s for breakfast before school all last week, telling her mom they were studying. It wasn’t a formal date though, and she hadn’t thought to plan an excuse. “Uh…” she scrambled, feeling the room close in as people filled the desks behind and on her other side. “I’m not feeling well,” she lied. “I overslept.”

She averted her gaze from Ben to dig a pencil out of her backpack from where it sat on the floor to her right. When she tried to unzip her pencil holder though, it got stuck and she flung it, one-handed, onto the floor. As she reached down to grab it, the person sitting next to her reached down to help too, and when she looked up, Paxton was grinning back at her.

“Morning, Vishwakumar. Long time, no see.”

Devi tried to swallow past a large lump in her throat. “Morning, Paxton,” she returned hesitantly, noting his hair was still damp and that it added curl to his hair that usually he used product to tame.

Devi had her first swim lesson with Paxton that morning before school. It’s not that she was hiding it from Ben, her boyfriend. It was just that she didn’t feel ready to tell him about it… so yeah, she was hiding it from him. Not because of Paxton though! She was hiding it because of her.

Not even Devi’s mom knew how afraid she was of being in the water since her paralysis was triggered. Prior to that, she loved swimming. It was the only sport she was at all inclined to and she even considered trying out for team sophomore year until she went crazy and lost her legs.

She tried to move past it. Well, kind of. Her physical therapist thought aquatic therapy may help strengthen and facilitate the functional return of her legs. Instead, it resulted in her screaming and hyperventilating in Dan’s arms as he struggled to get her back to the lift out of the pool. Devi begged Dan not to tell her mom about her newfound fear and promised she would discuss it with Dr. Ryan. Her physical therapist agreed, and Devi never mentioned it to anyone again. Until Paxton.

“You want to swim?” He repeated back, puzzled as they sat on the couch in the garage. “I’ve seen you swim.”

“When?”

“Your freshman year…” he trailed off as realization dawned on him.

Devi didn’t know Paxton had any idea who she was until she propositioned him at the beginning of school this year. He remembered her from the year before? He remembered her before she lost her legs?

“Yeah… I haven’t been able to since…”

“So when you fell in the pool at Gross’s party…?” Paxton filled the silence for her.

“I’m really glad you pulled me out otherwise it would have gotten way more embarrassing,” she admitted.

She saw his jaw clench before his next question, “Why didn’t your friends help you?”

“Um…” she took a deep breath to muster the courage up to tell him, “they don’t know… nobody knows.”

And then he gave her that same deep, calculated look. The look he gave her when they were in his car so many weeks ago. The look he gave her before they kissed. Before he kissed her.

He agreed instantly after that. And things went mildly well that morning. She wasn’t able to get in the water, so instead, she sat next to the edge of the pool and watched Paxton swim for awhile and then they talked.

She was surprised by how patient Paxton had been with her especially since she dragged him out of bed earlier than necessary. He told her it was a process though, and he agreed to help her through it. Her heart felt full when he said that. She probably would have read too far into it in the past, but things were different now.

Devi knew she would have to tell Ben eventually that she was spending so much time with Paxton, but she just didn’t want him to overreact. He knew how much she had pined for Paxton before they started dating, and even though she and Paxton were friends only now, it wouldn’t change the threat he posed in her boyfriend’s mind.

you and PHY seem awfully chummy - Fab

Devi looked over her shoulder at her friends after reading Fabiola’s text message. Both Fab and Eleanor were giving her pretty pointed looks, and Devi just responded with a grimace and raised eyebrows. This whole friends thing sounded so easy with Paxton when they were sitting on his couch in the middle of the night. No one else was around, no one could pass judgment. Things were going to be a little harder in practice.

Fortunately, class was pretty uneventful. Mr. Shapiro started a new unit, they went over the lesson, and they were dismissed. Devi gathered her things quickly and hurried out of the room without waiting for her friends, her boyfriend, or Paxton. Of course, Paxton was her friend, so she didn’t know why she listed him in his own category.

“Hey,” the object of her musings appeared beside her locker.

Devi jumped at the sound of his voice, but managed to somewhat recover. “Hey, what’s good, playa?”

Paxton smirked at her with warm eyes. “Just wanted to check on you now that it’s been a couple hours.”

“Oh! Honestly, I feel good. Watching you actually helps me calm down,” she said before realizing how it sounded. “I mean, not that I just watch you, but I mean, watching you swim… it’s nice to see how you glide through the water… it’s like a white noise machine.”

“Right,” Paxton replied slowly after a beat. “Well you should come by today after school. I have an idea.”

She nodded as he walked away down the hall. Before Devi’s imagination could get the better of her though, her friends replaced Paxton in her line of vision.

“What is going on?” Fabiola asked bluntly.

“Yeah, are you and Paxton hooking up behind Ben’s back?”

“What? Of course not!” Devi was outraged. How could they think she would do that? “Paxton is my friend.”

“Since when?”

“Yeah, last thing we knew, you went there for dinner for his sister and it got hella weird,” Eleanor added. “What gives?”

Devi had not shared the one on one conversations she and Paxton had with her friends. Sure, the initial apology after dinner would probably be okay. Having a drink with Paxton in the garage at 2 o’clock in the morning after catching him in his underwear with an erection? No, there was no good way to relay that encounter.

“Um..” Devi hesitated. She couldn’t tell them the truth now after hiding her fear for so long, and then telling Paxton before telling them. They’d think she was a bad friend. “I’m tutoring him,” she lied. “Yeah, he’s got to get his grades up to meet the minimum for Stanford swimming to offer him a scholarship so I’m helping him.”

“Does Ben know?” Eleanor asked as Devi’s phone pinged in her pocket.

She pulled her phone out and read the message from Paxton, don’t forget to bring your suit ;), and she felt her cheeks heat up. “No,” she told Eleanor absentmindedly. “No, he doesn’t know.”

“Well, are you going to tell him?” Fabiola prodded.

Devi shook herself out of her daze and really heard her friends’ questions. “No, not right now. You guys know he would freak out if he knew Paxton and I were spending time together no matter how platonic. I’ll tell him eventually but everything is still so new, I don’t want to wreck it.”

Her friends’ judgment was evident, but Devi couldn’t let that bother her. Paxton was helping her confront one of her deepest fears, and she didn’t need to feel guilty about that. Instead, she chose to focus on making the most of her time with Paxton and enjoying their friendship while hopefully ridding her of her phobia.

Devi knocked briefly before letting herself into the Hall-Yoshida garage. It was empty and so she dropped her bag and plopped down onto the couch. It was almost funny, Devi thought. Things were so different now. A few months ago, she was terrified entering this space. She’d freaked, cut her leg open and bolted. Even the last time she’d been here, she’d tried to quietly reflect and calm her nerves after having one of her sexual fantasies manifest in the form of actually seeing Paxton Hall-Yoshida in his underwear with a boner. Now, she just comes right in and —

“Make yourself at home,” Paxton’s voice broke her from her thoughts.

She intended to make a sarcastic retort, but was caught off guard by him being in swim trunks already, and not the tight spandex trunks he wore for the swim team. No, these were normal, red and black trunks. They were entirely less revealing, outside of showing off his muscled chest, but they weren’t a uniform. Something about Paxton being voluntarily half naked and not bleeding from the hand had Devi looking at him dumbly from across the room.

“Devi, you good?” He asked cautiously, coming to sit next to her.

Her gaze trailed down from his collarbone to his pecs, to his abs, to his… her eyes grew wide as she realized she was openly ogling him. She snapped her eyes back to his to find him grinning at her.

“Everything okay?” He asked again. She nodded dumbly in response. “Good. Why don’t you go change? I have an idea that may work to start.”

“Okay, I’ll go change in the bathroom and meet you back here?”

“Nah, just come out to the back yard.”

Completely disrobed in the bathroom, Devi had another decision to make. Two suits. She brought two bathing suits with her both that morning and in the afternoon. She hadn’t even bothered to change before class that morning because just entering the aquatic center was enough to bring her near hyperventilation. She couldn’t do that again, and to be fair, if Paxton had a pool, it was news to Devi. And she asked him to help her swim. If that’s what she really wanted, then she needed to trust Paxton and let him help her. That meant she had to choose: black, Speedo one-piece or bubble gum pink bikini?

“Why’d you even bring both, Devi?” She asked her reflection.

She wasn’t sure she was ready to answer that question. She knew things were different now. She was dating Ben, and Paxton was her friend. That was her choice… it was just a much easier choice to make when she and Paxton weren’t speaking to each other. If she was honest, she hadn’t been able to stop thinking about Paxton since their middle of the night encounter last week. He was right when he said they had come a long way. She had come a long way, becoming more comfortable around him, and seeing him on an equal level versus the Adonis pedestal she placed him on in the past. Then he became real.

Paxton became more than the unattainable sex god that riddled her darkest fantasies. He became someone she could talk with, laugh with, open up to. He became her friend. Her friend that was still a sex god that riddled her darkest fantasies… these were the thoughts that had her leaning toward the far more revealing bikini for their lesson that afternoon.

She had a boyfriend though, a boyfriend she very much liked. Sure, she and Ben were unkind to each other in the past. He had routinely referred to her by a boy’s name, called her unfuckable, and yeah, he started the rumor that she faked her paralysis freshman year. She played her own role in their antagonistic relationship though, and all that was behind them anyway. Ever since his party, Ben had been much nicer to her. Of course, that was including when he tried to kiss her while still dating Shira… but obviously, that was because he had feelings for her that when he was sober, he wasn’t ready to confront yet. He had been there for her like no one else had. He deserved a good girlfriend. That was Devi’s last thought on the subject before donning the black athletic one piece.

The first thing Devi saw when she stepped onto the patio made her heart catch in her throat. A hot tub. It was too big. It was too much. Too much. She couldn’t get in a hot tub. It was already way too hot, Devi thought, feeling the air get thicker around her. Her throat felt constricted and she wondered how anyone was as able to breathe in these conditions. It felt impossible.

“Devi! Are you okay?” She heard Paxton ask faintly.

Her head began shaking back and forth frantically, but she didn’t feel like she was the one controlling it. Instead, it was moving of its own accord, and her voice didn’t sound like her own when she said, “I can’t get in the hot tub.”

Two strong hands grasped her waist and physically turned her so her back was to the offending item. It was then she saw Paxton. His eyes searched hers desperately before a hand came to cradle her face. She immediately felt herself relax into his touch just enough that she could take a breath.

“Hey, you’re okay. I got you,” he cooed. “I know you’re not ready for that, and that’s okay. Just take a deep breath.”

She still felt like she was gulping for air, but her body melted into his as he pulled her in for a hug. They just stood like that until she could regain control of her breathing. When she did, Paxton gently released her and Devi was honestly surprised by how disappointed she was to not be in his arms any longer.

“You good?” He asked cautiously. She nodded sheepishly. “Cool. Let’s get away from this so you can see what I have set up for you.”

She nodded again and let him take her hand to lead her deeper into the backyard. When she saw it, she couldn’t believe the relief that flooded her.

“A slip n slide?” She huffed out.

“A slip n slide!” He dropped her hand to raise his arms victoriously. “I looked up some stuff about phobias and I think it’ll help. It’s called exposure treatment. We’ll start slow and work your way up.”

“You researched phobias?”

“Well, yeah,” he nodded. “And I’ll be here for you the whole time.”

Devi felt herself smile. Paxton really took the time to try to figure out how to help her. No throwing her in the deep end of the pool, but actually holding her hand through this. Being by her side while they figured it out together. She couldn’t believe how lucky she felt to have him in her life at that moment.

It wasn’t a very fancy slip n side, most likely he’d had it in the shed since he and Becca were kids. It was still in good shape though and he’d placed it over a decline at the end that allowed for pooling of water. He had the hose running and ready, but when they stepped up to the start, it became infinitely more intimidating.

As though he could sense her apprehension, Paxton said, “how about I go first, and then you can try?”

She tried to swallow past the lump in her throat in order to respond. When she wasn’t successful, she nodded. Paxton gave her a weak grin, and reached out to squeeze her shoulder. It was probably a measure of reassurance, and it worked for a moment, but the minute his touch was gone, her nerves settled in again.

“Okay, so you want to get a running start so you go faster through the slide,” he told her, taking four to five steps back. “You ready?”

“Ready,” she choked out after a beat of silence.

Paxton took off, and dove smoothly onto the track. Devi felt her anxiety melt away as he slid down the track on his stomach. It was almost like watching his perfect strokes through the water, and something about watching him made her forget her fear. Then he crashed into the small wading pool at the end of the slide, and just like that Devi’s breath was stuck in her throat again, and it felt like a bucket of ice water was dumped over her head.

When Paxton stood up, he immediately sought her gaze for eye contact. Just as quickly, he seemed to notice how her panic rose again.

“Devi,” he called down to her. “You can do this, okay? Don’t think about the water, just focus on me.” She could feel how wide her eyes were and her mouth was starting to dry out as it hung open, but Paxton’s encouragement started to wear her down when he said, “Come to me, Devi. I got you.”

She took a steadying breath and barely nodded before stepping a few paces back like Paxton had. Paxton continued to cheer her on and beckon her to his open arms as she fought her body to cooperate with her. Finally, after another deep breath, Devi let out a guttural scream, her war cry, and ran toward the slide. She slid onto her stomach much like Paxton had and did not have the good sense to close her mouth until it was filled with hose water. It got her choked up again and it was difficult to catch her breath, but just as quickly as she started, she was plunged into the wading pool. Before she had a chance to panic-swallow more water, Paxton’s strong arms hauled her to a standing position and she collided with his chest in a tight hug.

“You did it!” He whispered triumphantly. “You did great, I’m so proud of you.”

“I did it,” she breathed, arms clutched tightly around his shoulders as though he would disappear if she let go. “I did it,” she repeated, a tear slipping down her cheek.

Devi and Paxton worked with the slip n slide for three more weeks, and it was amazing how quickly she was improving. Each time, Paxton was there to catch her at the end of the slide, and she grew more confident with each trip.

“So do you have plans this weekend?” Paxton asked, passing her a towel.

“Probably just studying for the history test,” she replied, drying her hair gently.

“With Gross?”

They hadn’t talked about Ben at all during their sessions. She had also skirted the issue of spending so much time with Paxton by telling her boyfriend that she’d been assigned a new student to tutor. She didn’t tell him it was Paxton. Things had been calm the last few weeks despite how crazy the first months of the semester had been. If she was honest, she hadn’t spent much time with or thought much about Ben that week at all. Things were going so well with Paxton and their sessions that she spent most of her time looking forward to the next time she’d be in his backyard in her bathing suit.

“Uh.. I don’t know. Probably him, Fab, and Eleanor, I guess,” she told him. “Or by myself. I don’t really have anything planned.”

“Would you…” he trailed off quietly before finding his voice again. “Would you maybe want to study here… with me?”

Devi felt herself smile. “Sure, I mean, my friends think I’m tutoring you anyway so that would make sense.”

“What?”

She breathed through another smile at how his brow furrowed, but rolled her eyes at herself before answering him. “I had to have a reason for why we’re talking so much more at school… so I told them I was tutoring you.”

Paxton’s head dropped as he huffed out a laugh. “You’re really good at lying, huh?”

“No! I just… get nervous about how people will react to stuff so sometimes it’s just easier to say something else.”

He nodded. “Well, you better tutor me then. ‘Cause if I fail this test, your whole story falls apart,” he said taking a step closer to her.

“Maybe you just don’t listen to me,” she grinned.

He took another step forward, this time into her personal space. “Impossible,” he countered, “have you met you?”

Devi’s smile grew before she realized how close Paxton really was to her. It wasn’t his actual proximity. They’d been closer physically than ever in these recent weeks, but something felt different that time. She could feel the heat radiating off of him and there was electricity in the air. He seemed to feel it too, and shook himself free before taking the towel back from her. That only allowed him to take in the full view of her from top to bottom, forcing Devi to close her eyes so she didn’t feel the full force of his gaze.

She heard Paxton swallow, then clear his throat, and then he took a step back. Devi chose then to meet his gaze, and found the same calculating look she’d now seen a total of three times. He had a depth she hadn’t previously credited him with. Now that she’d seen it, it was hard to ignore.

“Uh.. yeah, I think we could study together.”

Paxton grinned crookedly at her. “Cool,” he licked his lips before changing the subject. “Why don’t you go ahead and change, and then I’ll take you home.”

“That’s okay, I can I walk.” Devi said quickly. “I mean, I’d like to walk. Helps me clear my head.”

“Oh.. okay.”

Devi didn’t feel like she took another breath until she was shut in the bathroom of the Hall-Yoshida residence. Was Paxton really flirting with her? Did he really check her out like she thought he had? She’d been so wrong about so many of their encounters in the past, but… he did kiss her. Paxton Hall Yoshida was her first kiss and it was only a couple months ago. Maybe he really liked her. Maybe they —

A text message on her phone cut off her internal rambling. When she read it, her breath caught in her throat again:

Why are you at Paxton’s?

Fuck. Ben.

How could she forget about Ben? Here she was going down the Paxton rabbit hole again when she had Ben, her actual boyfriend. Things were different now though. She wasn’t sure exactly when they changed, but she knew they had.

She quickly typed out a response and then changed into her dry clothes.

***

“So Paxton is the student you’re tutoring?

“Uh.. yeah, kinda,” Devi told Ben. “Paxton is my friend, but I am helping him study.” It wasn’t technically a lie anymore now that they’d made plans for Saturday.

“Anything else you want to tell me?”

“What are you accusing me of, Ben?”

“Obviously, I’m the only one committed to this relationship. You’re still just drooling over some dick that wouldn’t touch you with a ten-foot pole.”

Devi scoffed, as the wind left her sails. She knew Ben would be hurt, and she expected him to be jealous that she was spending time with Paxton. She didn’t expect him to say Paxton wouldn’t want anything to do with her. She didn’t expect him to imply that she wasn’t good enough for Paxton. Like Ben was doing her some great, big favor by dating her. Once a UN, always a UN, she guessed.

“You know, I came here ready to explain myself, ready to apologize. Maybe you’re right though. Maybe you’re the only one committed to this relationship. God knows, I don’t want to be in a relationship where it’s okay to talk to me like that.”

Ben’s eyes widened, and Devi watched the color drain from his face. “No, Devi, I didn’t mean” —

“You didn’t mean to, not accuse me of cheating on you, but instead, accuse me of so desperately wanting to cheat on you that I would be the lap dog to a different guy?”

Devi really thought Ben deserved an explanation. That was why she went to his house. She realized though, she didn’t owe him anything. Ben had been the constant ignition to Devi’s insecurities. She thought that would stop when they became boyfriend and girlfriend, but no. Instead, he wanted to keep them together by making her feel unwanted by anyone else. She knew better though.

“Devi” —

“You are seriously the textbook ‘nice guy,’ aren’t you?” She air quoted. “Well, I don’t need any of that. I think we’re done here.”

Ben is canceled.

Devi felt oddly satisfied when she sent the text to Fabiola and Eleanor. She thought she would feel guilty after their encounter, but honestly, she felt liberated. Ben had been there for her when no one else was, and he showed that he cared about her. Still, when confronted with the idea that she may want to spend time with someone else, he immediately turned on her. Red flag. Big red flag.

Her friends immediately made plans to have a sleepover at Eleanor’s the following night. They wanted all the details. When Devi happily supplied them, they encouraged her as enthusiastically as she expected.

“Yes, girl,” Eleanor cried, giving her snaps when she told them she wouldn’t let Ben talk to her that way.

“You’re a strong, independent woman, and you don’t need some small little white boy trying to keep you down,” Fabiola bolstered.

“Thanks, guys. That brings me to my next problem though.” And for the first time, she told her friends about when she and Paxton kissed, how her mom had yelled at them the next day and called Paxton stupid, and how he’d left her a voicemail because he’d come to see her while she was in Malibu with her family. They were shocked to say the least.

“So what’s your problem?”

“Wondering exactly how long the pole is that Paxton would touch you with?” Eleanor asked suggestively.

Nope, that is definitely not the issue, Devi thought as she recalled seeing Paxton in his underwear. No, she knew exactly how big a tent that pole could support. The question was, was she misinterpreting their relationship?

“No… I mean, do you think he could like me?”

“Well, he definitely liked you enough to kiss you, but you also chose Ben over him,” Fabiola recapped. “That’s a tough blow.”

“But he wants to spend time with Devi anyway,” Eleanor argued. “I mean, you guys have study sessions almost every afternoon.”

“Right,” Devi trailed off as she considered her encounters with Paxton since she and Ben started dating. How he’d been respectful of her relationship, never once putting Ben down or asking why she had decided to go out with him. She thought about what a good friend he’d been of late with their sessions. She thought about how close she felt to him, and how she wasn’t exaggerating their closeness like she had at the beginning of the school year. She didn’t need to dress up or fabricate the things he said or did to her anymore. Everything was really happening.

“Do you want us to come tomorrow and assess the situation?”

Devi considered Eleanor’s offer, but finally shook her head. “No, I think this is one I have to sort out myself.”

***

“Alright, who coined the term ‘Cold War’ in the British press in October 1954?” Devi asked, looking up at her companion.

“I don’t know… Russia?”

Her eyes narrowed. “No, George Orwell. You’re right, my reputation as a nerd and the best tutor in school is on the line.”

“Shut up, this stuff’s hard. We’re not all Devi Vishwakumar,” he bumped her with his elbow.

“You’re smart too though. How did you know all that stuff about Hinduism or phobias?”

“That’s different. That’s interesting stuff.”

Devi felt her cheeks heat up, and chose to stare at her textbook. Would Paxton find those things interesting if they weren’t directly related to her? Was it his way of saying that she was interesting or important to him? She chanced a glance toward him to see him was also very deliberately staring at his book. She briefly wondered why before he looked up sharply and slapped his knee.

“I guess we have a lot to get through then if we’re going to save your rep. Better get to it.”

“Yeah… for sure,” she said slowly before continuing to quiz him.

A couple hours, some poptarts and pizza rolls later, they had significantly improved Paxton’s knowledge of the subject matter. They both were thrilled with his progress.

“Okay, let’s come full circle,” Devi said. “Who coined the term ‘Cold War?’”

“George Orwell… in the British press… in 1954,” he finished sitting back in his chair confidently.

“Yes! Good job, dude. You picked up on this stuff, no problem!” She smiled.

“Well, you’re a good teacher,” he smiled back, leaning forward.

“You’re a good student,” she told him, biting her bottom lip and leaning forward towards him.

Paxton glanced at her lips briefly before licking his own. She thought, this was it. He was going to kiss her. Instead, Paxton blinked, his eyes staying closed a little longer than normal, and sighed before scooting his chair away from the table.

“Uh.. my parents won’t be home from work for a few hours, and Becca is at a friend’s house if you want to hangout some more,” he suggested, rubbing the back of his neck. “We could drag the slip n slide out?”

Devi smiled. “Umm… I think I’m ready for the next challenge.”

“Yeah?” Paxton asked disbelievingly. “You sure?”

“Yeah, I want to try.”

“Alright,” he smiled with a nod. “I’ll get changed and we’ll head out there.”

Once Devi was closed in the bathroom again, she pulled her suit out of her bag. Pink bikini, don’t fail me now.

After a quick change, and plucking any stray hairs, Devi opened the bathroom door to see Paxton waiting on the other side. Her confidence faltered as he took in her appearance. His brow nearly disappeared into his hairline, and she noticed him swallow before exhaling slowly.

“Is this okay?” She asked.

“Yeah. Yeah, totally okay,” he responded, finally meeting her eye. “I, uh, wanted to walk you out so we could avoid as strong a reaction as last time… We’re in this together, right?”

She nodded, appreciating his support. Together.

It seemed like such a good idea before. Before she was standing in front of a large container filled with water. Water that she would have to submerge herself in.

Already drowning in her own fear, Devi didn’t hear Paxton talking to her until she felt him take her hand.

“Hey, Devi,” he called, waving his other hand in her face. “Can you hear me?”

She blinked longer than usual to clear her head before finding his gaze again. “Yeah, sorry. I was just spiraling.”

“Listen, you don’t have to do this right now. There’s no pressure, okay?”

“I know,” she nodded, licking her lips apprehensively. “I want to do this. You won’t leave me, right?”

He smiled. “We’re in this together, Vishwakumar.”

With that, she carefully made her way up the steps, and stepped into the hot water. Paxton held her hand the whole way. The best part of using the hot tub? The heat further distracted her from her fear that she didn’t even realize Paxton was touching her for a moment. It wasn’t until she was sitting down and should have been relaxing that her anxiety began to spike again.

“Hey, breathe, okay? I’m right here,” Paxton’s hand slipped from hers to wrap around her shoulders.

Without thinking, without meaning to, Devi dropped her head into the crook of Paxton’s neck. Her arms clung to his waist desperately, willing her breathing to level out. She felt Paxton’s other arm come around to encircle her, and it had the very calming effect she assumed he intended. As her breathing returned to a normal pace, Devi found she felt almost sleepy. She felt warm, not because of the water, but inside. It was like her body was humming, like everything was fuzzy. She let out a deep sigh of relief, and felt Paxton shift slightly against her.

“Are you okay?” He whispered. She wondered if he could feel how peaceful things were in that moment. No, he probably just wanted to make sure she hadn’t passed out.

“Yeah,” she breathed. “This helps.”

“Yeah? Like watching me helps?”

“I can’t explain it, and I know it doesn’t make any sense especially because I’m such a disaster when we talk,” she rambled before taking a steadying breath, “but watching you, touching you, calms me down.”

Paxton took a shaky breath, and Devi pulled back slightly to look at him. His eyes were closed, cheeks flushed. She loved seeing him like this. Vulnerable, as though she affected him as much as he affected her. This time, she thought, I’ll kiss him.

Before Devi could lean forward, Paxton abruptly put space between them. One hand remained on her shoulder, but his head was hanging his eyes were closed.

“Devi,” he started before letting out a long sigh, “I am trying so hard. I mean, I love spending time with you and I want to be here for you. I want to be a good friend to you, but you’re killing me.”

“What?”

“You have a boyfriend,” he replied emphatically. “I don’t really know why, but you do. And all this,” he gestured between them, “feels a lot like cheating, and I’m not down for it.”

“Oh, no, no, no, no,” the words came tumbling out, “no, no, no. No, that’s on me. Paxton” —

“Devi, I like you,” he cut her off. “Not in the ‘I want to reinstate our sex agreement’ way, but like, I really like you. I hate studying! But you make it fun. I love the way you spit out that first five thoughts that pop into your head at any given moment. I love that you trust me to tell me your deepest fear that no one else knows, and I love that we’ve been able to work through it together. I don’t know if I can do this anymore though.”

“Sorry I didn’t interrupt, you really seemed like you were on a roll, but,” she paused to take another deep breath, “I don’t… have a boyfriend anymore.”

“What?”

“Things are different now. I broke up with Ben two days ago, and… I really like you too. I never wanted just sex from you. I just never thought we’d be here right now.”

“You don’t have a boyfriend?”

She shook her head, shyly looking down at the water. Her bottom lip found it’s way between her teeth, barely suppressing her smile. She felt his hand slip from her shoulder and snake it’s way around her waist. She looked up as he pulled her body into his so close that their breath mingled.

“Should we make another toast?” She asked nervously.

His forehead pressed against hers as he laughed. When he regained his composure, he looked in her eyes warmly. “Later.”

And for the second time, Paxton Hall-Yoshida’s lips were on hers, and it. was. electric. Somehow, it was even better than the first time. She felt everything else melt away, and it was just the two of them floating through space. Nothing else mattered for that moment. She wasn’t sure when she ended up in his lap, but she wound her arms around his neck all the same before her hands found his curly hair. Under other circumstances, she may have worried that her own hair had become so frizzy that he wouldn’t find her attractive. She realized though, she didn’t have to worry about that. No, as Paxton gripped her hips tighter, she knew very well that he was attracted to her.

This was everything she ever wanted, except it was better. Paxton’s hand came up to cradle her face as his tongue massaged hers in a way that made her spine tingle. Devi was so engrossed in having the greatest moment of her life, she didn’t hear the back door open.

“Wooooo!” Becca hollered as they jumped apart. “Finally!”

“Becca, get out of here!” Paxton yelled, splashing his sister. She laughed, making a comment about being safe as she went back inside.

“So… your sister’s home,” Devi said. They sat awkwardly for a moment before both breaking into a fit of laughter.

“Yeah, mood ruined, I guess.”

“Well, I know one thing: this is the happiest I’ve felt in any body of water in a year.”

He huffed out a laugh, eyes finding his lap before meeting her gaze again. “Happy to help.”

<< Part 2

#never have i ever #devi vishwakumar #paxton hall yoshida #daxton #nhie #paxton x devi #devi x paxton #never have i ever netflix #writing

[lokifantasies]

Stress and Anxiety

Summary: You convince Loki to go home, and he and Jade have a father-daughter bonding moment.

A/N: Enjoy this father-daughter moment. I think I'm done breaking everyone's hearts...for now.

Character(s): Loki, Jade, & Reader

Read the Mischievous Life series here!

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Loki holds your hand as you try your best to breathe through the cramps and pain – hoping and praying that nothing happens to your unborn son.

"Loki, I can't go through this again," you cry – terrified that you're in the process of losing another baby.

Loki gently massages your hand – doing whatever he can to keep you calm. "You'll both be fine, my love."

This god's strength is something you admire. No matter what seems to happen, Loki always seems to know how to keep you calm. Sometimes you wish you could read his thoughts and know what's going through his mind, but you're sure his thoughts differ from the words he says to keep you relaxed.

"I love you," you say – giving him a weak smile as he wipes tears from your eyes.

Loki leans down and kisses your forehead lovingly. "And I love you...both of you."

Jade tries her best to take care of her siblings while you and Loki are at the hospital – making sure that Emmy, Ivy, and Kaiser sleep soundly through the night. Mia, however, can sense the two of you gone. The five-month-old cries in her big sister's arms, and no matter what Jade does, she can't seem to calm the baby down.

"Please, Mia," Jade quietly begs – carrying her baby sister into her bedroom where Stripes is sound asleep. "Please, stop crying. I changed you, and you're not hungry, so what's wrong?"

Jade walks around for a few minutes – talking to Mia and lightly bouncing her in her arms. After an hour or so of trying to get the infant to stop crying, Jade sits on her bed with Mia, and she begins to text her dad.

You can tell Loki is trying his best to help Jade and be with and support you.

"Babe," you say – getting his attention from his phone as he texts Jade. "Please go be with her. We will be fine – just like you said."

Loki looks offended at your words. "No way am I leaving you," he argues. "You and our son need me here."

"They need you more," you insist. "Jade is in no shape to take care of the others...she needs at least her dad there."

Loki closes his eyes – clearly conflicted on what to do, but the door to the hospital room opens, and his eyes open in response. "How are we feeling?" the doctor asks – approaching you and Loki.

"Not as bad," you tell her. "Do we know anything yet? Am I going to -,"

"You're not losing your baby," she tells you with a smile.

You and Loki breathe sighs of relief that you weren't even aware you were holding, and instantly, the weight lifts back off your shoulders.

"I do want to keep you overnight, however," the doctor continues. "Just for observation...have you been on bed rest like I told you to?"

You give the doctor a guilty smile. "There's been a lot going on with Jade," you begin to explain. "It's been...stressful."

"Your baby needs you to try to avoid as much stress as possible, okay?" she practically begs.

"Okay," you quietly say – nodding your head. "So, everything's fine?"

The doctor nods. "Yes, it was just some cramping. Other than that, we need to work on relaxing and avoiding stressful situations if we want to get his oxygen levels up."

You finally smile at the doctor. "Deal."

The doctor tells you that she'll be checking in with you every two hours to make sure everything is still fine, and then she leaves the room.

"Loki," you say – a warning tone in your voice as you look over to the god.

"No," he refuses again. "I want to be here...with you."

"And I want you to be here too," you retort, "but our daughter needs you at home...you can't tell me she's not terrified of being home alone."

Jade walks around the house – finally getting Mia to go back to sleep after what seems like forever. Wherever she goes, she swears she can feel someone behind her – someone watching her every move. Multiple times, when she walks through the living room, she pulls the curtains back and looks out the windows – ensuring that no one is waiting to get her. Her anxiety skyrockets the longer you and Loki are away, and finally, she goes into her room and grabs her bong – taking it and the weed her dad had gotten her out into the living room to smoke. Jade takes giant hits – smiling as soon as she feels the effects starting to kick in. As the sixteen-year-old leans back and relaxes on the sofa – Loki comes walking through the door.

"Hey, dad," Jade says in a chill voice – greeting her father. She sits up when Loki sits down next to her. "How's mom and baby?"

Loki flashes Jade a quick smile. "They'll be fine...they want to keep her overnight for observation, though."

"Thank God," Jade exhales – the weight also lifting off her shoulders at the knowledge that her mom and baby brother are going to be fine. "Why're you here? Shouldn't you be with mom?"

Loki chuckles and slides the bong over towards him – catching Jade's attention. "Mom wanted me here with you and your siblings...she knows you don't want to be alone."

"Right, hey dad, what're you doing?" Jade mutters a quick response – watching Loki suspiciously as he refills the bong. "I was done with it for the night."

"I'm not," Loki says with a mischievous smirk. "You're not the only of us one who has stress and anxiety."

Jade raises an eyebrow. "Uh...is that even going to affect you? Please don't smoke all my weed."

"Really, my love?" Loki questions – giving Jade a knowing look. "Do you honestly believe that I went to some random dealer to get you the weak marijuana that Midgardians seem to love so much?"

Jade's mouth drops. "You went to Asgard...and bought me Asgardian weed?"

"Did you expect anything less?" Loki smiles – lighting the bong and taking a large hit – leaning back on the sofa before exhaling – Jade soon following suit.

"So, that's why it's so good," the goddess finally figures out. "I'm gonna need you to get me some more of this."

#loki laufeyson #loki fanfic #loki fandom #dad!loki #loki x reader #loki x you #mischievous life #ongoing series #requests open #send requests #loki family #jade lokisdottir

[cerises-amoureuses]

Firstly, what we need to realise is that Harry was incredibly attracted to Ginny throughout HBP, to the stage where seeing Ginny kiss another boy drove him up the wall. He spent a better part of the year wrestling with his emotions, which is something he didn’t go through with Cho Chang. Of course, this could be because Ginny, being Ron’s little sister, posed an interesting dilemma, but also because Harry’s feelings extended beyond a simple crush. The easiest way to deduct this is to go back to Harry’s infamous first kiss: he did not enjoy it, nor did he express any sort of desire to do it again. But in Ginny’s case, he had barely worked out his feelings for her when he started envisioning himself kissing her. Harry only ever thought Cho was nice-looking, but he experienced a very typical, boyish sort of lust and want when it came to Ginny.

“She began popping up in his dreams in ways that made his devoutly thankful Ron could not perform legilimency.” – Harry, HBP.

It does not take a genius to figure out exactly what he and Ginny were doing in Harry’s dreams. This inneuendo is remarkably suggestive; Harry had begun having sexual, inappropriate dreams about his best friend’s little sister that made him feel guilty and embarrassed. Moreover, note the instances when Ginny and Harry came in contact; they were often punctuated with Harry either feeling a “swooping sensation” or getting so tense that goosebumps erupted on the back of his neck. There is no evidence of Harry ever feeling jumpy by a girl’s slight touch before, which begs the question why it flustered him so physically in the first place. All evidences point to the thick sexual tension that Harry was feeling between himself and Ginny.

Simply put, Harry’s attraction to Ginny had permeated the boundaries of innocent crushes and gone straight to lustful thoughts and wild dreams.

“… He had received a lot more Bludger injuries during practice because he had not been keeping his eyes on the Snitch .. “ - Harry, HBP.

There is little room for argument for one trying to say that Harry was admiring Ginny in all innocence from a broomstick suspended in midair. This is another not-so subtle allusion to Harry’s burgeoning sexual attraction. Being a sixteen-year old boy, it is fairly plausible that Harry was being highly inappropriate, possibly undressing Ginny with his eyes, and he needed the force of a Bludger to snap him out of it. It is ridiculous to insinuate that Harry wasn’t looking a little intently than he ought to at Ginny; how else could he have ignored a Bludger speeding at him?

Quite apart from the fact that Harry described his impromptu mid-common room snog with Ginny in a remarkably heavenly fashion, he also explicitly went on to say that if they had time, they would talk about the Quidditch match. This does not specifically point to anything too scandalous, but it does make very clear that Harry intended on taking Ginny to a deserted area for more kissing. This seems a terribly bold step for two people who haven’t even started dating yet. It speaks a lot about their relationship that they started things off with a good, (presumably) lengthy snog, and jumped headlong into the opportunity to snog some more. It insinuates that the two were already very comfortable with each other, and already moving very fast in their relationship.

If that didn’t scream CLUE!!! enough, the next sure indicator was Harry’s feelings while they were dating. His narration was light, airy and genuinely happy – a dramatic change from the teenage angst that readers had been dealing with since GOF. It might be in my imagination, but I have always thought Harry in that period to be all kinds of insufferable, walking around with a goofy grin on his face and not paying much attention to anything – that lovestruck behaviour is largely hinted at in the books,after all. Hadn’t Professor Slughorn attributed Harry’s detoriating Potions grade to “lovesickness”? This obviously meant that Harry had been displaying visible symptoms of the same, which prompted that line of reasoning. What else could make the Boy-Who-Finally-Got-A-Girlfriend “happily impervious to gossip”?

On a particularly striking instance, Harry states that he was reliving a happy moment spent with Ginny in the grounds – if it was “happy” enough for Harry to dwell on it later, what could they have been doing, one wonders? (Cough, cough). Harry expressed explicit frustration that he could no longer spend time with Ginny, and there a very choice things that would, per say, “frustrate” a sixteen-year old boy.

Perhaps it isn’t overly obvious on skimming HBP, but if one analyses Harry’s narration, as I have, it becomes laughably clear that Harry and Ginny were almost definitely being adventurous. Ginny, for her part, is described as fiery and passionate – nothing in her character suggests restraint or holding back. A war, of which Harry was a main part, was going on in full-swing outside the cosy walls of the castle. It is additionally suggestive that JK Rowling also wrote in a specific conversation where it was revealed to Harry that people often elope during times of war. Ginny herself had commented playfully on it. If taking that step as such a young age wasn’t exactly responsible, the could hardly be blamed for it.

Another compelling argument is the fact that Harry, in particular, was, for want of a better word, especially well-equipped. For goodness’ sakes, the boy owned a legitimate Invisibilty Cloak, the Marauder’s Map and was an active user of the Room of Requirement. While Harry made use of these magical items for relatively noble and innocent purposes – in a non-Voldemort dangered world, what else would students want to make themselves invisible for? Ginny, in particular, doesn’t seem the type to ignore the dual potential of items like the map and Cloak.

Lastly, the dealbreaker was the stiflingly unbearable encounters between Harry and Ginny in DH. If there was slight sexual tension in the air between them in HBP, this was magnified about a hundred times in DH. Not many people choose to dwell on this, but I invite you think for a moment – imagine being boyfriend and girlfriend scarcely two months ago, and having a blissful, perfect relationship. Now, imagine being forced to live under the same roof – two teenagers – when they were so unwillingly forced to break up. They had barely spent a month dating, only to be brutally separated, and then made to live together again? Forget Crucio, there’s nothing more torturous than that.

Every time Harry made eye-contact her, he starts to recall moments spent with Ginny in secluded parts of the grounds, which is possibly the least subtle reference in the entire franchise. Again, he experiences acute, agonising frustration, to the point where he is actively trying not to brush against her while they eat dinner – it sounds almost as if he doesn’t trust himself. Another extremely suggestive moment is when Aunt Muriel makes a comment on the scandalous, revealing quality of Ginny’s bridesmaid dress, and the latter turns around and winks at Harry.

No explanation needed.

Need I dwell on Harry’s absolutely endearing jealousy while Ginny danced with other boys at the wedding? He, quite literally, leans against a pillar, folds his arms, (presumably with a glare on his face) and stares fixedly at Ginny.

One confusing instance, however, was Ginny’s – ahem – birthday present to Harry, in which he says, “And then she was kissing him like she had never kissed him before ...” This could somewhat serve as proof that they never progressed farther than snogging, but this greatly contradicts that aforementioned alusions to the same. It also seems a little naive to assume that they were exceedingly good little children while they disappeared for hours to secluded corners and fondly dwell on those instances to the point of distraction afterwards. No, it is my belief that it had been so long since Harry kissed her that he was automatically prone to over-exaggerating their sudden reprisal.

As I come to my conclusion, a few worthy mentions – Harry’s thoughts just before Voldemort struck him in the Forbidden Forest in DH: “And Harry thought inexplicably of Ginny, and her blazing look, and the feel of her lips on his –“ Alas, he never completed his train of thinking, but it does leave considerable food for thought.

Therefore, one can comfortably assume that in at least one area of his life, Harry acted like any normal boy his age. He had strong, passionate feelings for Ginny, and she unquestionably felt the same about him (“I never gave up on you. Not really. I always hoped …”), and those kind of things are recipes for teenage intimacy. However, anyone clinging to childhood beliefs can also safely predict that they waited. We may never know, but the evident has always been there, just as JK Rowling intended.

What are you thinking? 🤔

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