Tumgik
#hate this fucking show and the way it has constantly inspired me to push my own artistic boundaries. mad as hell about that
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[ID: a digital drawing of characters from the owl house based on the song "up the wolves" by the mountain goats. At the top of the drawing there's a rectangular panel showing Camila and Eda. Camila looks out at the boiling isles at night with her bat. Eda mirrors her pose, with her arm covered in feathers. Shadows form to look like the collectors face, covering Eda's eyes and parts of Camila. Beneath this panel is a star with King and the Collector inside of it, holding hands and spinning midair. Beneath this is the archway portal from thanks to them, which is glowing, and at the bottom of the image is the hexsquad lined up in their designs from for the future, lit by the portal light and looking determinedly into the distance. The lyrics that span the image are "our mother has been absent/ever since we founded Rome/but there's gonna be a party when the wolf comes home". The background is black. End ID]
I knew I couldn't say goodbye to this show without redrawing one of my favorite old pieces, this lyric comic based on Up The Wolves by the mountain goats. I made it pre-ttt and was honestly really vindicated by all the wolf imagery that ep, lmao
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xxbimbobunnyxx · 5 months
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Spider Lily
(Steve Harrington x Goth!Fem!Reader)
Summary: You can’t stand Steve Harrington, you didn’t like him in highschool during his “King Steve” days and you don’t like him now. But even though you deny it, even to yourself, there’s always been something about him that made your heart beat speed up. When you’re stuck closing with him one night at Family Video… things finally boil over. Wk:4.3k
Warnings: Sliggght King Steve behavior, he’s not as much of an asshole but he is a bit of a player, enemies to (kinda?) lovers, unprotected sex, spanking, a lil bit of choking (ofc, it’s me), hair pulling, dirty talk (a lil bit of taunting), Soulmate AU, the end is kinda angsty but there will be a part 2. 18+MINDI!!
A/N: It’s been a minute since I had the drive to sit down a finish something so quickly, but I felt very inspired by this idea and hopefully it’s gonna help my writers block. I have 2 other bigger stories l’m working on but this came to me and I had to get it out. Shout out to my bbs @reidsbtch @babygorewhore & @bimbobaggins69 for hyping me up on this one. Divider used is by @firefly-graphics.🖤
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You roll your eyes as you watch Steve push the cart filled with video tapes down one of the isles of Family Video. Today was one of the unfortunate days that Robin was off and you were stuck closing alone with him. Robin often served as a buffer between the two of you, but when left alone you butted heads constantly. Bickering over who had to do inventory, who was going to count the till, whose turn it was to answer the phone when it rings. It was never ending scoffs and glares, but you always put on a show for the customers, acting civil whenever the store wasn’t empty.
You didn’t hate Steve, but you just couldn’t stand him. He walked around with this aura of arrogance about him, always flirting with girls that came in, always asking them on dates. They almost always said yes, but on multiple occasions you’ve watched those same girls come back a week later, pissed or crying because he hadn’t called. Robin insisted that he “changed” since highschool. Which you couldn’t deny that in some ways he had, but just because he isn’t as big of an asshole now, doesn’t mean he wasn’t still a player. It seemed like he couldn’t let that part of being “King Steve” go.
Steve didn’t hate you, but the fact that you couldn’t stand him drove him crazy. He gets it, he wasn’t exactly the nicest to you in highschool. He tried to apologize. Multiple times. But you shut him down every time. You were constantly throwing passive aggressive comments his way, rolling your eyes, sometimes you gag when he’s asking girls out right in front of them. So he just started giving you the cold shoulder, glaring and scoffing back, immaturely sticking his tongue out at you. He even pulled your hair a few times. To you it felt like he was proving you right, that he really hadn’t changed. But for him, he kind of felt like a school boy with a crush on a girl that couldn’t stand him.
“I can feel you staring, you know.” Steve had stopped the cart in the middle of the horror aisle, he restocked the tapes as he spoke, not even turning to look at you.
“I’m not staring at you Harrington, keep fucking dreaming.” You scoff, throwing a glare his way before turning your back to him, shoving a tape into the VCR and hitting rewind.
“Yeeeaah suuure, your eyes were practically burning a hole in the side of my head.” He chuckled, turning his head to glance at you. Your back was turned to him, the green Family Video vest you both had to wear obstructing his view from the cropped band tee you were wearing underneath it.
He wasn’t exactly sure when his fascination with you started, but he knows it was much longer than he would probably even admit to himself. He was always drawn to you, in a way. Even if he always had the wrong way of showing it. He felt awful about the things he and his friends said to you growing up, calling you a “witch” and knocking your lunch tray out of your hands. One time he just stood by while Carol ripped the book he had seen you reading all week to streads right in front of you. Throwing the ripped pages in your face. Everybody laughed, but Steve didn’t. Not that time. Not when usually you laughed them off, or gave them shit right back, but he watched the tears well in your eyes and the way your lip trembled. When you ran off with those tears starting to pour down your cheeks, part of him wanted to follow you.
“I’m gonna turn the sign off and lock the door, you wanna count the till? I’ll finish up the go backs.”
He didn’t wait for you to answer, knowing it would be some kind of sassy remark. He unhooked his set of keys from his belt loop, pulling the string on the sign to click it off and locking the door. You look over your shoulder at him, you hate how your eyes linger on the way his shoulders look in that dumb polo and how his hands hold the keys. No matter how much you dislike him you can’t deny that he’s gorgeous. He’s not normally your type, but something about Steve has always been attractive to you. And you hate it. It makes him even more unbearable to you.
You start counting the till and you’re midway through the quarters when you hear a loud crash, causing you to jump and drop them all over the ground. Your head whips to the side, your eyes landing on Steve who is picking up the cart he knocked over in the middle of the aisle, most of the tapes were on the floor and it knocked into one of the shelves, causing some of the ones there to drop to the ground as well.
“Steve, what the fuck! That scared the shit out of me!” You snapped at him as you got down on the ground to pick up the fallen quarters.
“It scared the shit out of you? It scared the shit out of me! It almost fell on my god damn foot!” Steve scoffs as he starts to pick up the tapes. Were you seriously mad at him right now?
He hears the sound of your heavy black boots before he sees you, your shadow casting over him in his crouched position. He looks up at you and almost chokes. Your long black velvet skirt accentuates your curves perfectly, a slit up to your thigh showing off a sliver of skin, your cropped tee that you definitely cut yourself is loose enough that he can see up it slightly, getting a view of slight under boob… you weren’t wearing a bra. The bright fluorescent family video lights shine above you and from this angle it makes you look like an angel dressed in black. Your combat clad booted foot taps on the ground as you cross your arms, glaring down at him.
“What the hell happened? You seriously knocked the cart over?” Your voice was teasing, your lips turned up into a smirk.
“That rug had a folded corner and the wheel got caught, I don’t know why you’re acting like I threw it on the ground or something.” Steve rolled his eyes for what felt like the hundredth time that day, standing up to put the tapes back on the shelf. He rests his hands on his hips, his lips set into a hard line as he glares at you. “What is your problem with me, truly?”
“Harrington, you’re joking right?” You laughed, straight up laughed in his face.
“Umm, no? Why the fuck would I be joking? I seriously have tried to be nice to you but no matter what I do you give me a fucking attitude.”
“Oh excuse me, King Steve!! How dare I respect royalty.” You throw your hands up in mock surrender, your eyes widen but that damn smirk doesn’t falter.
“Oh don’t fucking start with that again! You know that’s not who I am anymore, I’ve told you I’m sorry in every way I can possibly think of! I’m sorry I was a fucking dick! But I’m different now! You just - you bring out this side of me. You’re so fucking frustrating!” He runs his hands through his chestnut locks before dragging them down his face, letting out a deep sigh.
“If you’re soooo different why are there different girls coming in here every week whining because you didn’t call them back? Kind of sounds like a dick fucking move to me.”
“Why do you care? You’re constantly bringing that up. Like yeah Robin gives me shit about it but she’s just fucking with me, you’re actually mad. Are you… jealous?”
“Why the fuck would I be jealous Steve? I don’t even fucking like you as a person let alone am I romantically interested in you!!” You were pissed now, jealous? He has some fucking audacity to even think that, but to say it out loud?
“I don’t know, you seem kinda jealous to me. You’re always giving the girls I ask out dirty looks, with this pout on your lips. Also that gagging thing you do, I really would chalk it up to you actually thinking it’s gross but when Stacy came in demanding answers about why I didn’t call… you still glared, but you had this smirk on your lips, instead of a pout…” He takes a few steps closer, only leaving a foot between you. The air feels tense… but in a way it never has before.
“Oh my god, you are so fucking arrogant, Steve Harrington! You do realize not every single girl wants to fall at your feet, right? Grow up! We aren’t in highschool anymore!” You’re talking with your hands, your boot stomping against the ground as you yell at him.
“If we aren’t in highschool anymore than why can't you let this go!? You know I don’t really think that right? There was one girl I never thought wanted me… until right now.” He bites his lip, his eyes wandering your form. He takes a step closer to you so you’re chest to chest, his face is inches from yours and his hazel eyes are staring daggers into yours. But he notices you don’t back away, or push him off, you just glare right back.
“If you’re talking about me, you couldn’t be further off. I haven’t, won’t, and will never want you. You’re a fucking ass.” Your black manicured finger pokes at his chest and he grabs your smaller hand in his large one, holding it in place on his chest.
“Then why aren’t you moving?” You’ve never heard his voice this low and husky and it sent a shiver down your spine against your will.
“I-“ you try to come up with a reason, you really do, but you don’t know why you aren't moving, you just know you don’t want to. No matter how much your mind tries to protest, your body betrays you.
“You what? You don’t have an answer because you know it’s true… I can feel you shaking, baby.” The hand that isn’t holding yours comes up to cup your face, his thumb running over your lips. Baby? Fuck. You shouldn’t love that as much as you do. But right now you feel like you’d do anything to hear him say it again.
“Fuck it.”
You thread your fingers into his hair, pulling his lips against your own into a harsh kiss. You hate to admit that you’ve thought about kissing him before. But in your mind it was always this aggressive anger fueled thing and even though you pulled him into the kiss intending to do just that, the minute your lips touched it became tender. His lips were so soft, and he somehow tasted so sweet, every single nerve in your body felt like it was lit up. You suddenly understood all those cheesy romance movies that talked about “fireworks” when the characters finally kiss. It was the kind of kiss they describe when they teach you about soulmate bounds in school. But Steve couldn’t be your soulmate, could he? There’s no way. You push the thought from your mind for now, letting your body melt into his kiss.
His tongue swipes over your bottom lip and the kiss quickly becomes heated, his hands coming down to grab your hips harshly and yours pulling at his hair. You both moan into the kiss, your bodies pressed closely together, your thighs clenched and his cock starts to harden in his already tight jeans. Your body feels like it’s on fire everywhere he’s touching, those fireworks continuing to go off under your skin. His leg slides between your thighs and you subconsciously grind down on it. Your body searching for any sort of friction.
“Fuck. Stock room. Now.” Steve pulls back from the kiss, his eyes are filled with lust and his breathing is heavy. He uses his grip on your hips to spin you around, pulling your back against his chest and placing a kiss on your neck. “You want that pretty girl? Want me to fuck you?”
You don’t respond with words, you just pull away from him and start walking towards the back, not even sparing him a glance.
As soon as the stockroom door is shut, Steve is on you, harshly grabbing your hips to pull you against him, his mouth feverishly attacking yours. This kiss is different from the first, it’s desperate, hungry. Your arms loop around his shoulders, your hands traveling to the hairs at the nape of his neck and pulling. He moans into the kiss, his tongue exploring every inch of your mouth, almost like he’s trying to memorize it.
“Fuck, Steve. I need you.”
You break the kiss, looking up at him with lust filled eyes. He turns you, pushing your back up against one of the shorter shelves. He pushes your best off, one of his hands traveling up your cropped shirt, finding you braless just like he thought he would. He gropes your tit, tweaking your sensitive nipple before moving onto the other one. His lips attack your neck and you’re sure there will be a mark or two you'd have to explain to Robin when you saw her. But right now you didn’t care. You need him everywhere.
“Yeah? You need me now? I thought you couldn’t stand me?”
Steve looked at you with a devilish smirk, his unoccupied hand finding the slit in your skirt, grazing over your upper thigh before traveling behind you to grab a handful of your ass. He ruts against you and you can feel his hard cock through his jeans. You palm him, causing him to groan into your throat, his breath sending tingles down your spine.
“I still can’t stand you Harrington, but right now, I need you to fuck me like you hate me.” You grab him through his jeans, moving your hand up and down his shaft to the best of your ability with the burrier in the way.
“Shit. Fuck. Take this the fuck off then.”
His fingers hook in the waistband of your skirt, the velvet feels soft on his skin and for a fleeting moment he imagines how it might feel against his cheek while he laid in your lap, your fingers in his hair in a more gentle way. He pushes the thought from his mind, giving you a questioning glance, you nod and he immediately pushes your skirt down your hips. It pools around your boots on the floor. He kneels down to pull it from your feet entirely, tossing it to the side.
He takes a moment to admire you. Your ass pressed up against the shelf, your skirt is askew, hanging off your shoulder where you cut the collar to make it more low cut, the bright red lacy thong you’re wearing sits perfectly on your curves, and those god damn platform boots that drive him crazy. Your hairs a bit disheveled and your black painted lips are kiss swollen, some of your shiny black lipgloss smeared around your mouth. You’re so frustratingly beautiful, he just wants to eat you alive. You lean down to take your boots off but Steve stops you, grabbing your wrist to pull you back into a standing position.
“Keep them on” he practically growls at you, sending heat rushing through your whole body. Who would’ve thought King Steve would want to fuck a girl in giant goth boots? His large hands grab you roughly flipping you over so your hips are pressed up against the waist high shelf. He pushes your back down so you're bent over it. Leaving a harsh smack on your ass. “Look at this pretty little ass, bet your pussy is just as pretty, huh?”
His fingers run up your clothed slit, looping in the strings of your panties before pushing them down to your ankles. You hear him taking his shirt off and you peer over your shoulder to catch a glimpse of his bare chest. You hadn’t seen him shirtless since highschool and he had definitely matured. His chest now covered in a patch of dark hair, his shoulders broader, his stomach is a little less toned since he doesn’t play sports anymore but it’s honestly sexier that way to you. A moan leaves your lips when his fingers return to your core, gathering up the wetness between your lips, he brings his slick fingers to your clit, circling it.
“Steeeveee, stop fucking teasing me and do som-“ you’re cut off by a harsh smack on your ass, causing you to jolt forward and moan.
“Quit with the fucking attitude or I’m not giving you shit, I’ll walk out of here right now.” Two more smacks land on your opposite ass cheek before two large fingers are being shoved knuckle deep into your pussy. You’re so wet they slide right in. He immediately finds your sweet spot, rubbing the pads of his fingers against it before thrusting his fingers in and out of you roughly. “You’re awfully wet for someone who can’t stand me baby, maybe you don’t like me, but your pussy does.”
“Fuck - fuck Steve, your fi - fingers are so fucking good.” Your eyes roll back, your hips pushing against his hand on their own accord. No one had ever gotten you so close to the edge this fast, but Steve was making you crumble in mere minutes, on just his thick fingers alone. His thumb comes down to rub quick circles on your clit and you think that’s it, you feel yourself about to fall over the edge when suddenly he pulls his fingers out, leaving you feeling empty. “What the fuck! I was about to cum you asshole!!”
“I thought you wanted me to fuck you like I hate you? Only girls I like get to cum, unless they beg for it.” You hear his belt buckle clinking behind you, and god do you wish you could see his cock right now. It felt so big through his jeans and you know it has to be beautiful. Even though you can’t see it you feel him run his tip through your dripping folds. “I’m gonna fuck you so good, you’ll be begging before you know it. I know you’re gonna say some shit like ‘keep dreaming, Harrington’ but I don’t wanna hear it. I just wanna hear you beg for me.”
You’re prepared to give him a snide come back but it’s erased from your mind when you feel the head of his cock start to slide inside you. He pushes it in and out a few times and for a second you think he’s gonna go slow, you’re about to complain but you’re cut off by the moan that leaves your lips when he shoves his cock halfway inside you in one thrust. He’s big, but the stretch feels so fucking good and you’re so wet that he’s sliding so perfectly inside you. You want to feel all of him, you push your hips back so his cock slides fully inside you. He lets you bounce back against him a few times before he’s grabbing your hips, fucking into you at a brutal pace.
“Oh shit, Steve!” You moan loudly, your hands gripping onto the shelf for purchase as he thrusts into you over and over again. You’re sure your hips will be bruised, from not only the shelf digging into them but also the hard grasp he has on you. The thought of being marked up by him stirs something inside you that you try not to dwell on.
“This pussy feels so fucking good, you’re gripping me so good baby, so fucking tight. Like it was made for me.”
His hand comes up to grab onto your hair, pulling your head until your back is flushed against his chest. The new angle has him hitting deeper than before, his cock hitting your sweet spot over and over again. The hand not in your hair grabs onto your tits harshly, pulling and pinching your nipples as he continues his brutal pace. You’re a moaning mess, drool starting to drip down your chin, and you’re already so close to cumming it’s almost embarrassing.
“Fuuuuck oh my - oh my fucking godddd.” Your eyes roll back as Steve lets go of the grip on your hair, quickly grabbing you by the throat before you can fall forward. His other hand reaches down to your clit, rubbing fast circles on it.
“You’re close already, huh? I can feel it, I can feel your pussy squeezing my cock. You wanna cum? Beg. Beg me to cum, or I’ll stop fucking you.” He growls in your ear, never letting up on his thrusts.
“No - I - I’m - fuck! Just let me cum, don’t be a fucking dick Steve!!” His pace slows, he shoves his cock deep inside you and then stops moving entirely. One hand is still around your throat and the other is pressing down on your clit but no longer moving.
“I said beg. I’ll pull out and jerk off right here in front of you. Now be a good girl and beg me to cum.”
“God fucking damn it. Steve! Fucking please? Please let me cum? Keep fucking me please? Just wanna cum on your big cock! I can’t take it anymore! Please make me cum!” You didn’t want it to come out that whiny, but once you started begging it was like you couldn’t stop. You need him to keep fucking you.
“Good fucking girl, that wasn’t so hard was it?” He releases his grip on your throat pushing on your back so your top half is flat against the shelf again. He grips your hips harshly as he resumes fucking into you harder and faster than before. “This is all you needed to ditch that attitude, huh? Needed to be fucked so good? Put in your place?”
“Yes - yeah - fuuuckkkk feels so fucking good I -“
His fingers find your clit again and that’s it for you. Your orgasm crashes over you like a flood. It racks through your entire body, making you see stars. The feeling of your walls tightening around his cock and the sounds you’re making as your high washes over you sends Steve over the edge too. He cums hard, his cock nestled deep inside you as he fills you.
“Shit. Fuck.” Steve pants, pulling out of you and stepping back a few inches so he can watch his cum drip from your pussy. “Wish I could keep you like this, all fucked out and dripping with my cum. Too cock drunk to give me an attitude.”
You feel his fingers caress your overly sensitive lips, gathering the cum that dripped out, he shoves his fingers inside you before leaning down to pull your panties back up your legs.
“Now you have to go home stuffed full of me, when you take your panties off you won’t be able to help but think of me.” You can hear the smirk in his voice and it makes you roll your eyes. You turn around to face him, giving him a death glare. “Look at me like that all you want, I’m not going to forget you were begging me to cum less than five minutes ago.”
“Oh my god, you’re so annoying.” You roll your eyes again, but this time when you say it you laugh, and there’s a glimmer in your eyes that’s still teasing, but lighter. It gives Steve hope.
“Whaaateeever you say, baby.”
He smirks at you, sending you a wink before turning around to find his discarded shirt. You take a moment to admire his back. Broad and covered in moles that you want to connect with your fingers, maybe even your lips. His jeans fit so perfectly on his ass, and his shoulders… wait. You pause, your mouth dropping open as you catch sight of his shoulder. You almost think your mind is playing tricks on you, you wish it was. But there clear as day on his left upper shoulder are two simple red spider lilies. A mark that matches the one on your ribs exactly. Steve Harrington, King Steve, the bane of your existence… was your soulmate.
This could not be happening. No way. Absolutely not. You grab your skirt, pulling it on in a frenzy. Steve turns to look at you right as you are pulling up the zipper with a panicked look on your face.
“Hey, it’s okay, are you okay? I’m sorry for teasing you I-“
“I gotta go. I - uh - I just gotta go. I’m sorry.”
You can’t even think straight, you can’t be near him right now. You need to think and the smell of him and the way his hands feel on your forearms is clouding your thoughts and you just need to go. You spare him a sad glance before pulling your arms from his grasp. You grab your bag from under the counter and run out of the building towards your car. You slam the door closed once you’re inside, your breathing is labored and your mind feels like someone put it in a blender. You shove the keys in the ignition, regretting your decision to peak back at the building before pulling out. Steve was standing in the front window, a confused look on his face as he watched you pull away. He was beautiful, and frustrating, and he was your goddamn soulmate. Fuck.
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clarajohnson · 2 months
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the magicians s2e13
remember when i said i hated q the first time i watched this was a lot of the reason why
you loved him i love you... :-( i'm not without sympathy for him and his sad little face
cancer plus :-((((((
lipson is so fine i wish they gave her better hair
kady/penny are so great together it's crazy to me how briefly they actually get to interact
i love how much it costs eliot to ask if julia's okay "i can tell you the way you're relating to that couch is not unknown to me"
also love the horseshoe over the door. been there bestie !!!!
eliot's book has two volumes ????
you've done enough you get to be done :-(((((( they pull no punches on the season finales
fen's baby makes me verrrrrry sad
this is how you know i'm truly liveblogging these episodes because i don't remember if this is when they take margo's eye. i hope this is when that happens that eye patch is so hot.
it really just is so interesting how much of this magic show is about saving magic which is an animating force for all life in the universe and is constantly on the verge of disappearing without ever being able to return
sad little nerd king !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
EYE IS GONE !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
bambi one eye. it do.
jesus christ this show is such a time capsule. strings cover of best day of my life.
there is so so sooooooo much to be said about q killing ember
"society of godless heathens making this the first day of our societal adulthood" such an interesting thing to say
what did otd do to the writers to make her act so undignified in this arc
with every good thing no matter how small it is it's always married to something so completely disgusting :-((((((
big thumbs down on qualice kiss unfortunately
gods like ember have parents you IDIOT !!!!!!
oh my gosh i forgot about the magic pipes how fucking fun is THAT
"anything is possible" "or was, anyway" waaaahhhhhh
unbelievably rude of this show to just mention that vampires exist and not push further on that
joseph calling her "my alice" give me a season on THAT please
"they need to think they're inspired while they're being ruled"
THE FAIRIES PISS ME OFF SOOOOOOO BAD BTW
julia quitting law school is a HAPPY ENDING TO ME !!!!!!!! show ends there congratulations julia
nobody ever believes that julia has magic they should stop it
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🔥 inspired by OUR recent horror conversation!!!! horror!!!!!
let's get REAL unpopular
disgust is not a valid reason to claim that something isn't art, real horror, artistically valuable, etc. yes, that includes the most disgusting, depraved, gory, meaningless splatter film made on $2 and a dream that you specifically hate. you're more than welcome to dislike it, hate it, detest, it, and criticize it, but it has a right to exist. my only exceptions are when real abuse and exploitation are involved. take lucifer valentine, an abuser who exploited his partner's struggle with bulimia to produce his films, or a serbian film which uses real-life child actors in its simulated sexual assault scenes. this doesn't just apply to horror, i think that any art form that abuses its participants or depicts (child) sexual abuse in a pornographic, romanticized, or visually explicit manner is dangerous and does not have a right to exist.
on that note, though, one of the only reason i personally will hate a horror movie is if it insults its audience. that is the cardinal sin of horror to me, and of all art in general. for a mainstream example, the human centipede sequels prominently feature the series' director and dickride for him constantly, displaying a truly insufferable ego and lack of talent, originality, or humility. you know i'm a gorehound and i love what may be considered 'shocking,' but i think a line can be drawn between 'shock' and 'alienation.' it's a little hard to describe, but the human centipede sequels are what i would consider to be purposefully alienating. they reek of hatred for their audience.
friday the 13th is an unbearably dull franchise and jason doesn't have anything going for him. a murderous villain with a facial difference is a tired and insulting trope but at the same time it bugs me when people draw him without his facial difference, especially if they're drawing him to be "attractive."
the new wave of "elevated horror" films are tedious, uninteresting, afraid to push boundaries, and have nothing to really say. oh, it's about trauma... wow, that's really specific and original, i've never heard that one before. nothing is explored in an interesting or thoughtful way. look, this family has a fucked up dynamic and they kill each other which is a really powerful statement about familial trauma. blegh. if you want to go for something subtle, something meaningful behind your horror, you should first have something to say and then a clear vision for it. for another mainstream example, i think jordan peele does this excellently. i really appreciated how NOPE spun a story about how hollywood will literally chew you up and spit you out, how animals and actors (especially actors of color) are abused by the film and television industry, and how the pursuit of the "perfect shot," which may mean getting a picture of a giant balloon animal or just getting the scene right for your show, can be the death of you. if it makes your parents ask what the hell was going on throughout the entire movie, then it's working.
the saw franchise should be adapted into a soap opera because it already is one
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sunrisefairy · 3 years
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My muse
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Pairing: Art student!Sirius x reader Warning: NSFW! MDNI 18+, swearing, fingering, unprotected sex, if I’ve forgotten anything please let me know! Summary: Sirius is struggling with an art assignment until he finds inspiration in his girlfriend. Or the one when Sirius and reader bang on a canvas.  A/N: wrote this for @anxiousblanketqueen writing challenge, I had a lot of fun with this one Jill so I hope you enjoy it too. Based of the prompt Art Sex. This article is helpful with visualising the art work!
Taglist: if you’re crossed out i couldn’t tag you @theweasleyslut​ @anxiousblanketqueen​ @accioweaslcy​ @widowdays​ @inglourious-imagines​ @garbdump​ @star-sunshine-sage​ @weelittleweasley​ @a-dusty-emerald​ @starlightkell​ @omghufflepuff​ @weasleysprincess​ @j-amespotter​ @gryffindorgirl To be added to the taglist click here 
“Oh my god this is fucking bullshit!” Sirius groans before throwing his paint brush, it landing with a clatter on the hardwood floor of his art studio.
You hear all the commotion from the kitchen and decided to check in on your boyfriend. It was nearing the end of the term and Sirius had been very agitated and snappy from all the stress.
“You okay babe?” you poke your head through the door to see Sirius standing in the middle of the room, practically death staring a half-finished painting resting on one of his wooden easels.
“Fucking bullshit,” your boyfriend mumbles, clenching and unclenching his paint stained hands.
You slowly walk up to him and wind your arms around his waist and kissing his back through his white cotton t-shirt, “wanna talk to me about it?” you whisper.
Sirius twists in your grip until he’s facing you allowing you to get a good look at him; his shoulders are tense, his jaw clenched tightly from the pressure of school and his eyebrows are furrowed which has become a regular facial expression of him the past few weeks. You reach your hand up and delicately trace the worry lines in his forehead. Sirius immediately relaxes at your touch; his faces becomes more natural and his shoulders slump. Since dating Sirius you’ve come to understand how much he struggles to talk about his feelings. He doesn’t like dumping his problems on those around him as it makes him feel like a burden. So you try your best to be patient with him and always remind him you’ll be here no matter what.
“Just stressed about school,” Sirius murmurs his eyes looking down at the floor between your bodies.
You let your hand fall down to his shoulders, lightly squeezing, “yeah? What about school?”
Sirius’ hands find their way under the t-shirt you’re wearing which evidently is one of his that you’ve stolen, he lets his fingers trace patterns on your warm skin. “Just this one assignment is making me go insane. Can’t seem to get it right.” He gestures to the canvas sitting in the middle of the room.
If you’re being honest, anything Sirius paints leaves you memorised and evokes numerous emotions from you. You are constantly telling your boyfriend how talented he is and every time he’ll roll his eyes at your compliment. “I think it looks amazing babe,” you state truthfully.
To no surprise, Sirius rolls his eyes at your comment. “yes, well you have to say that ‘cos you’re my girlfriend.”
Sirius leaves your embrace and walks back over to the painting, crossing his arms over his chest and frowning so intensely you think laser beam might shoot from his eyes and through this artwork. He starts mumbling again, irritation is laced thickly on his words, “representation of raw love,” he mocks, “what a load of utter crap. My professor is so pretentious, the only instruction he gives us for this stupid bloody assignment is ‘make a piece which represents raw love’ what does that even mean? I’ll tell you what it is, it’s fucking bullshit.”
You shuffle closer to Sirius so you’re standing at his side, both staring at his current piece. You’re not really sure how to help, you’re no artist but you hate seeing Sirius so worked up. “What are other people in your class doing for the assignment? Maybe you can gather inspiration from them?”
Sirius shrugs and stuffs his hands in his dark jeans which are covered in paint splatters, “Kirra’s doing a photography piece of her husband and kids, Gage is making some sculpture of his dog.”
“Alright,” you pause for a brief moment “well maybe think of ways people show love or how you show love, like real emotional love ya’know?” you feel like you’re grasping at straws here and making up some bullshit.
You glance over at Sirius, he’s biting his bottom lip deep in thought, you stay silent not really knowing what else to say to assist him. Slowly a look of realisation washes over your boyfriend’s face, eyes wide and a grin gracing his lips. “Holy shit baby, you’re a genius!”
Butterflies erupt deep in your belly from the praise and you giggle when Sirius starts peppering your face with tiny kisses to show his gratitude. Eventually he connects your lips together in what you thought would be a short but sweet kiss. However, you squeak in surprise when Sirius quickly deepens the kiss, his hands gripping tightly at your waist before slowly moving them down to grope at your arse.
“You should probably get working on your project then Sirius,” you breathe against his mouth, disappointed to stop things before they get too heated but you know Sirius’ inspiration comes and goes in waves and if you wait until after the two of you get off, then he might fall back into feeling unmotivated again.
“I am working on it,” you pull away confusion all over your face.
“What do you mean?” you query.
Sirius chuckles and moves away from you to move the canvas and easel to the edge of the room out of the way, he starts laying out a large piece of cream canvas fabric on the floor. “Think about it, what’s a way people show love?” he asks you, squirting numerous colours of paint carelessly onto the fabric.
“Babe there’s a lot of way people show love,” you answer puzzled, what did making out with you have to do with his piece? And why was he now squirting colours onto a blank canvas.
Sirius continues, “yes I know that but what about a raw, emotional way people show love? a primal way to show love so to speak?”
When you finally look back up at Sirius’ face you’re met with a cheeky smirk that you know all too well. It’s not until he removes his shirt do you connect the dots. “Sirius I’m not letting you fuck me on this canvas for a university project for god’s sake.”
The raven-haired boy’s grin only widens as he slowly moves closer to you, his eyes burning into your skin. You feel hot and vulnerable under his gaze, it’s like he’s stalking his prey. Your breath hitches in your throat when Sirius’ body is pressed flush against your own and you can feel his hot breath fanning your face as he speaks in a low, hushed tone, “I’m not going to fuck you,” his voice drops an octave like it does when he’s feeling horny. Just the tone of his voice alone causes a wetness to pool in your panties. “Wanna make love to you baby. Wanna show you how much I love you, can I do that darlin’?”
You bite your lip trying to swallow the moan that is threatening to spill from your mouth when Sirius starts leaving sloppy kisses on your neck. Damn Sirius Black for knowing all your weak spots.
“Just want to make you feel good baby girl,” he tugs the off t-shirt your body. “Can I do that? Can I make you feel good?”
You close your eyes and focus on Sirius’ large hands cupping and massaging your breasts tenderly, you always were putty in his hands. Fuck it you thought. “Yes, please make love to me Sirius.”
The boy grins and whispers a thank you against your skin. He takes no time in removing both of your clothes until you’re standing in front of each other naked. You and Sirius take the opportunity to study each other. You gaze over all the curves and lines on Sirius’ body, the way his muscle flex and move, the freckle on his hip bone, the tiny scar on his left shoulder, the coarse hair of his happy trail. He was beautiful, stunning, breathtaking. And he was all yours.
Sirius helps you lay down against the canvas, you gasp at the cold, squishy feeling of the paint beneath you. It feels foreign but not unwelcoming, you wriggle a little, enjoying the way the substance slides around. Sirius kneels between your legs, relishing in the way your chest is already rising and falling frantically from arousal, “so gorgeous darlin,” he traces a finger down from your collar bone all the way to your core finding it soaked already.
You squirm when Sirius teases your entrance with his finger, the cold paint moving and mixing into the canvas under you. A quiet whine escapes your lips the moment Sirius pushes his index finger inside you and starts pumping it steadily.
“Need you to be loud for me baby, want to know how good I make you feel ‘kay?” Sirius commands trying to get into a comfortable position in between your spread legs, his body sliding slighting from the paint.
You answer him with a loud moan. Soon Sirius has added 2 more fingers into the mix causing you to wriggle and rock your hips into his hand, “so good Sirius, fuck.”
With his free hand, Sirius grips your thigh trying to keep you still, blue paint smears against the soft flesh of your thigh and Sirius is captured by how striking you look laying here right now, chest flushed, and eyes closed. The way your body is squirming from pleasure is causing the paint on the canvas to blend and mix together. Sirius scoops up some red paint from the fabric and swipes it across your breasts and over your nipples, “so pretty.” He mumbles tugging and pinching your nipples.
“Sirius,” you pant desperately, “please. Need more.”
Sirius withdraws his fingers earning a whine from you and strokes his cock a few times before lining it up with your entrance, “shh darlin’. M’here to make you feel good, yeah? Want me to make you feel good?”
You wrap your legs around him urging him to finally push into you. You needed it, needed to feel Sirius stretch you out and fill you up with his cock, needed to hear Sirius gasp and groan into your ear, needed to feel him rock his hips into yours, “please Sirius.”
With a low groan escapes from both of you when Sirius finally pushes into you, Sirius begins thrusting his hips deep and slow into yours, both of your relishing in the feeling and sensation coursing your bodies. Hands around running along the others body, squeezing, tugging, scratching at skin, leaving traces of paint in its wake. Sirius has buried his head in the crook of your neck, his hair tickling your cheek, mumbling how beautiful you look spread out for him.
Deeper, you need it deeper. Wrapping your legs tightly around your boyfriend, you manage to roll the two of you over, Sirius underneath you with you straddling his waist, allowing you to bounce of his cock. From this angle, he reaches deeper inside of you, his hard cock prodding at that sponging spot inside of you. The pure affection and love the two of you feel for each other was unmistakeable in this moment. The tenderness and intimacy of this act made your toes tingle and heart warm in your chest.
Continuing to bounce up and down on Sirius cock, you take a second to watch the boy below you, the only word seemingly fitting to describe him was angelic. His dark locks are sprawled out around the canvas, a mixture of red, blue and purple paint framing his body as well as splotches on his skin. His eyes are trained on yours, a look set in them that you’ve come to be familiar with, undying love.
You lower your head to connect your lips together, wanting-no needing to feel close, to feel connected.
“I love you,” you mumble breathlessly against Sirius’ pink lips. You feel that familiar euphoric sensation creeping up on you, Sirius’ cock hitting your g-spot every time you lower your body.
Sirius’ grips your waist tight and firmly, his own hips slamming up into you, “I love you too baby, so much.” He can feel your pussy clenching around him, he watches the way your breasts bounce between your bodies, he reaches his head forward to latch his mouth onto your nipple, sucking and licking on the sensitive bud. The noises slipping from your mouth makes his cock twitch.
“Sirius,” you pant threading your fingers through his dark hair to keep him close to your body.
Your body feels like it’s on fire and ready to combust, your legs trembling, and you know you won’t last much longer with the way Sirius is suckling at your nipple and he knows it.
“Want you to cum for me darlin, be my good girl and cum on my cock,” he groans into your breast, sucking and licking at your salty skin.
The coil in the pit of your belly snaps and with a load high pitched whine you’re releasing all over Sirius’ cock, your pussy clenching and legs shaking from the stimulation. After your release, it only takes Sirius a few more thrusts until he’s following suit, his load shooting and filling you up, a string of I love you’s tumbling from both of your mouths.
You collapse onto Sirius’ chest, neither of you make any effort to move even once your breathing has settled. Laying here with Sirius made you feel safe and protected. The way his index finger was trailing up and down your spine made you shiver, and you could feel him kissing your scalp gently. Undeniably, there was love radiating from his body, you could feel it and you only hope he could feel it radiating from yours too.
~~~
“Hey guys, that painting hanging up in the bedroom is new, yeah?” James questions, traipsing back into the living room where the rest of the group was.
You feel a heat rise in your cheeks when you realise which painting the bespectacled boy is referring too. Sirius nods pulling you tighter into his side.
“Did you paint that one Pads?” Remus asks. Most, if not all the artwork displayed in yours and Sirius’ home was created by him. It normally took a bit of persuading Sirius to let you hang up his work, he didn’t like to come across as cocky. But as soon as this canvas was dried and stretched onto a frame Sirius wasted no time in mounting it; above your shared bed, him claiming it ‘gets him in the mood whenever he looks at it’ (and he really wasn’t lying).
The boy beside you grins and plants a sloppy kiss against your cheek, “me and Y/N painted that one,” he says teasingly.
You shoot him a death glare warning him to keep his big mouth shut. “Don’t,” you mouth.
“That’s so cool! Didn’t know you were so artistic Y/N!” James exclaims excitedly, clearly impressed by the painting.
Sirius chuckles loudly pinching your side making you yelp, “oh she’s very talented when he comes to that type of stuff. I think we might need to make another piece together babe, what do you think?”
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ifmywishescametrue · 3 years
Note
Choosing which prompt to send you from list was an impossible task!! They’re just all that good🥺 but if u feel inspired, maybe 15 or 76 would be really cute for stevetony?
Also, hope you have the best and loveliest day, friend 💖💝
thank you for sending one!! for #76 - "thank you for making me smile" - here's 1.6k words of getting together and absolutely terrible jokes
also i hope you have the loveliest day too 🥺
"I'm never listening to your advice again," Steve says the second he walks in the door. He lets it slam shut behind him and stomps off to his bedroom with another rough bang.
Tony and Bucky exchange a look on the couch, and Tony pauses their video game.
"Me or you?"
"Probably you," Bucky says. "Your advice is usually shit."
Tony scoffs, "Please, I'm a genius for a reason. All of my advice is amazing. Or are you forgetting that I'm the reason that you have a boyfriend right now?"
"One time in the last three years and you won't let it go."
"It'd be you and your right hand for the rest of your life if it wasn't for me."
Bucky rolls his eyes, "I would have made it work with Sam on my own eventually. But that's besides the point. I haven't given Steve any advice lately, so it has to be you. And in case you forgot, I don't even live here. He didn't know I was here when he said it."
"You don't live here?" Tony says with mock surprise. "Wow, you eat an awful lot of our food then."
Bucky grins, "It's payback for all the times you did the same to me before I moved out. Now go fix Steve. We'll rematch tomorrow."
"I didn't break him," Tony argues, even as he sets his controller down and stands from the couch. "I am a beacon of wisdom."
"You started a fire in the microwave twice last week, beacon."
Tony flips him off on his way to Steve's bedroom. He knocks once and ignores it when Steve tells him to go away.
Steve is sitting at his desk with his back to the door and his sketchbook open in front of him. He has a pencil in his hand, but the page is untouched.
"So, uh, what's up with you?"
"Nothing."
Tony nods slowly, "Right, okay. Care to share what advice of mine went wrong exactly? Cause I gotta say I'm drawing a blank."
"I was talking to Buck."
"Oh," Tony says in relief, then he frowns. "How'd you even know he was here?"
"When isn't he here? Our fridge is always empty because of him."
Tony smiles and flops down on Steve's bed, propping himself up against the pillows with his arms folded behind his head. He pushes the back of Steve's chair with his foot, making it spin his way.
"So what did Bucky do?"
Steve looks like he's about to say, but then he bites his lip and shakes his head instead. "Really doesn't matter."
Tony looks at him for a long moment, taking in all those subtle tells of his. The slight downturn of the corners of his mouth and the crease between his brows, but they don't come with any tension in his jaw or shoulders, which means he's more disappointed than angry. His eyes never hide hurt, but there's none to be found in them. Whatever it was didn't crush him, and Tony knows just how to fix him when he's like this.
He pokes Steve's arm with his socked toes. "Hey, Steve, why did the golfer bring two pairs of pants?"
Steve sighs, but there's already a hint of a smile. Further evidence to support Tony's hypothesis.
"Why, Tony?"
"In case he got a hole in one."
Steve presses his lips together and shakes his head. "That's not very funny."
"Why do bees have sticky hair?"
The look Steve gives him is long-suffering.
"Because they use honeycombs," Tony grins, and Steve relaxes back into his chair a little. "What kind of music do planets like?"
"Neptunes," Steve says, smirking a little, and Tony pouts dramatically.
"Nooo, how did you know that?"
"Used it on me two months ago. Remember when you broke the sink and you didn't want me to be mad at you anymore?"
"I also remember fixing the sink in the same day, but fine dwell on the fact that I broke it in the first place."
Steve laughs, and Tony feels the knot in his own chest loosen. He hates it when Steve's upset. It throws him off his own axis, because his world revolves around Steve's sun.
He gets up from the desk chair, and Tony shifts over to make room for him on the bed. They reach for each other's hands at the same time, interlocking fingers in the small space between them.
It's moments like these when the longing hits him the most. When Steve is this close, but it doesn't mean nearly as much to him as it does to Tony.
Sometimes he pictures what it would be like if he leaned over a little more. If Steve's eyes would flicker down to his lips, then away quickly like he didn't want to be caught. He wonders what Steve's cheek would feel like under his hand as he pulls his attention back, silently telling him it's okay to look.
It always stops there in his mind, right before a first kiss that he just knows would change his life. Guilt creeps in, because he should be happy with what he has. Happy with all of the pieces Steve lets him have now. It's more than most people will ever get.
"Thank you," Steve says. "You're the only one who can ever get me to smile after a day like today."
"Do you want to talk about it?" Tony asks, tilting his head to the side to look at him.
Steve bites his lip again, staring up at the ceiling. It takes a long moment for him to talk.
"There's somebody that I like, but they don't like me back. Not like that, anyway."
Tony's heart sinks, but he tries not to let it show. "You told them and they rejected you?"
Steve shakes his head, "No, I don't need to tell them to know how they feel. But Bucky said that I should find someone else to get over them, so I asked out that girl in my art history class."
"The one with the nose ring?"
"That's the one, yeah. We went for coffee this morning."
"How was it?" Tony asks, and more guilt accompanies the fact that he's actively and selfishly hoping Steve is about to say that it was awful.
Steve shrugs, "It was fine, technically. But then she tried to kiss me, and I sort of freaked out and ruined it. She looked at me like I was insane, and, god, it was so embarrassing, but I just couldn't do it when I know that I don't actually want anything like that from her. I didn't want to lead her on. It's not fair to her."
"Not fair to you either," Tony says softly. "You shouldn't force yourself to like someone you don't. And whoever the other person is, the one that doesn't want you back, they're missing out on someone really amazing, and they're stupid to let you go."
Steve smiles, but it's tinged with sadness as he turns his head to look at Tony. "I don't know about that. They can do better than me."
"Hey, no, don't say that. You're incredible. You're funny and smart and gorgeous, and I've never met anyone as kind as you in my entire life. There isn't anyone better than you, okay? And if they don't see that, then fuck them. Clearly, they're dumb as hell anyway," Tony rants, getting progressively louder as he goes and his free hand gesturing wildly.
"They're kind of a genius, actually."
Tony rolls his eyes, "Yeah, sure they are. Way to miss the point."
Steve's smile turns amused. "No, but they really are."
"What is this?" Tony asks with narrow eyes. "Are you trying to make me jealous by saying you know other geniuses? Cause I'm the only know-it-all in your life. I claimed the spot. It's mine."
"Definitely yours," Steve agrees, and he shifts a little to turn on his side. With his left hand, he tentatively reaches up towards Tony's face, and Tony's breath catches at the brush of fingertips against his cheek. "I think I might have been wrong, though, about how they feel about me."
It takes a few seconds for it to click in Tony's, but even when it does he doesn't believe it just yet.
"Why's that?"
"Apparently they think I'm incredible, and they get really angry when anybody else thinks otherwise."
Tony smiles softly, "Yeah, they really don't like that."
Steve's thumb strokes across his cheekbone, then his fingers drift back to run through his hair.
"They think I'm funny, too, but they've also got a terrible sense of humor, so I don't know how accurate that is."
Tony laughs, then says, "You know what I think?"
"What's that?"
"I think you should kiss them. Just go for it and see what happens."
Steve smiles, slowly leaning down, "You really think so? It could make things weird. We might not be able to be friends anymore."
Tony puts his hand on the nape of Steve's neck, drawing him further in until he's a scant inch away. "Trust me, they don't really want to be just a friend, anyway."
He finds out that Steve's skin is smooth and warm beneath his palms, and his lips are unexpectedly soft. His hands are constantly in motion, slowly mapping out Tony's hips and sides and back like he's memorizing the feeling. As if it's his one chance to learn what Tony feels like he won't let it get away from him. But it won't be the only one. There will be second, third, and hundredth kisses, because Tony knows better than to let someone like Steve slip away.
"Hey, Tony?" Steve whispers after.
"Yeah?"
"What's the best thing about Switzerland?"
Tony smiles, "What?"
"I don't know, but the flag is a big plus."
They stare at each other, and Steve is the first to crack, but his laugh makes Tony follow right behind him.
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stellocchia · 2 years
Note
Give me sommmmee possibly last of his kind human Tommy living in this world full of instinct driven hybrids.
You're completely free to do with this what you want but here's some inspiration:
• tubbo, a goat who's instinct to headbutt tommy gets triggered by several things and who's skull is very much harder than Tommy's. Also. Tommy better never make his back into something even slightly resembling a surface because even at a very steep angle Tubbo will attempt to climb him and just. Stay there.
• Ranboo, an enderman who WILL seek him out in the middle of the night, glowing purple eyes and a block of some kind which Tommy has to accept if he wants Ranboo to stop intently staring at him. Also. He just picks people up a lot. That includes Tommy. Also??? Kinda like a cat in the way that if you place down a boat for him he WILL sit in it. Screeches sometimes
• Wilbur who I've decided is an avian 100% mentally adopted that kid years ago as part of his flock and the hair ruffle is some weird imitation of grooming. Does build nests. Has absolutely attempted to push Tommy of an edge so he could learn to fly on a more instinct driven day. Actually probably on several of those days.
That's just a few.
Also. If you include our lil headcanon of Tommy picking up habbits and mimicking sounds like chirps etc while growing up and just. Those being a part of how he is every day?
I'm gonna fucking be so happy u don't even know I love hybrid stuff and the advanced version of us meowing back at our cats.
(prompt privilege)
Hmmm. Surprisingly this is a pretty hard one for me, but I'll try to do my best!
---
Tommy was peculiar.
He didn't have horns like Tubbo or Ranboo. He didn't have fangs or tusks like Dream and Techno. He didn't have a tail like way too many people in the server to count. He didn't have wings like Wilbur or Phil. He didn't even have feathers, fur, or scales like literally everyone else around him!
The only patch of fur he had was his hair, but that wasn't enough to identify what exactly he was. And the apparent absence of instincts in him didn't help either.
He liked holding certain objects sometimes. There was a particular stick he found one time that had a bump near one of its extremities and Tommy adored passing his thumb over it as he held it in one hand. But he couldn't pick up blocks as perfectly as Ranboo did, and never found himself hovering over someone's bed at three am offering them a flower-like that weirdo, so he knew he probably wasn't an enderman.
He grew up with Tubbo so headbutting him as a show of affection had slowly become natural to him, but the pain in his head every time he went did it with a bit too much vigor was enough of a proof that he wasn't a goat either.
He didn't sleep much at night, but that was due to his chronic insomnia, definitely not because he felt any more energized during it. As a matter of fact, he felt constantly tired be it day or night and, having spoken at length about it with Dream during his exile he knew that it was different for the man. So he wasn't a spider either.
He liked gold as much as he liked anything shiny or expensive. He did like golden apples quite a bit more than normal but he was almost entirely sure it was because of the feeling of safety the absorption effect gave him more so than the cold layer encasing them. So not a piglin either.
He thought he was onto something with avians. He loved spending time in Wilbur's nest and he always enjoyed when his brother played with his hair or braided them into pretty hairstyles. It was nice. Soothing. And he always enjoyed preening Wilbur's beautiful dark grey wings.
He even started chirping at one point. It always got Wilbur's attention instantly and he thrived in it.
Sadly, Tommy never grew any feathers and he had always been scared of heights. He could ignore it as a kid when everything else still fit perfectly into the picture to make him belong, but he started hating when Wilbur touched his hair in Pogtopia and that turned into him hating anyone touching it.
Apparently, it never was really like preening, he'd just trusted him with that closeness and Wilbur had killed that trust.
Not an avian either then.
Tommy was peculiar. He didn't really belong anywhere, but that was fine. He didn't need to.
His little family was a beautiful display of mismatched colors and he fit right in there.
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Text
Prey for You
Genre: Smut
Word Count: 3.6k
Summary: You have a thing for prey hybrids. You admit. The way they tremble under you while simultaneously baring their neck for you gets you off. It's not your fault Chan's friend group has so many pretty little boys that you're constantly running south of him. You see, the wolf hybrid doesn’t very much appreciate you preying on his friends.  Warnings: switch!reader, switch!chan, wolf!hybrid chan, fox!hybrid reader, chan has a big dick, size kink, too much dirty talk, power dynamics, degradation, messy dirty sex so don’t @me 
Edit: I’m so dumb I forgot to mention that Chan’s character in this is inspired by @skzctnightnight​‘s Prowl so go read it because the smut is even hotter in it and there is a complex, intriguing storyline to boot uwu
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4 Part 5, Part 6
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Credit to the gif that started my chan obsession 
“You’re really pretty.” You drawl, brushing your hand over the flushed face of the squirrel hybrid you have pinned against the door, the party in full swing just outside. “You know that?”
He opens his mouth to say something but all that comes out is a whimper as you press your knee between his legs, rubbing your thigh against his hard length. Poor boy doesn’t know what to do with himself. He is simultaneously terrified and turned on. The predatory way you were looking at him triggering his flight response, but the seductive purr to your voice and his precarious position make it hard to think of anything other than you.  
And that’s exactly how you like them--scared, pretty boys who are so horny they ignore their instincts. They like it too, if the fact that they always come back for more is anything to go by. Danger just tastes so sweet.
You’re so high off the delicious smell of Jisung that you don’t realize he is there until he’s banging on the bedroom door. “Open the fuck up, fox.”
You pounce on Jisung, ignoring the banging on the door and kissing him. You’ll be damned if you let that meddling wolf ruin yet another hookup for you. But the low growl rumbling deep in your throat tips the scales too much, and the squirrel hybrid cowers back, his fear overtaking his hunger now, and you know you’ve lost him.
“If you don’t open up, I’ll break this fucking door.”
Huffing through your nose, you step away and yank the door open to face the infuriating newcomer. “What do you want?”
He quickly pulls Jisung to his side. “I thought I told you to stay away from my friends.”
“And I thought I told you to lighten up and stop cockblocking me.” You spit, turning to smirk at Jisung. “I just wanted a little taste.”
Chan pushes him further behind him, and growls at you, the sound much deeper and more menacing than your own and you have to stop yourself from taking a step back. “You will not come near my friends again or I’ll make you regret it.”
You roll your eyes at that. “What will you do to me, give me a stern talking to? You’re all bark and no bite.”
The glare he pins you with makes goosebumps erupt all over your body, his lips drawn back to bare his sharp canines threateningly, and for a second, you think he might actually attack you. But then he closes his eyes and lets the anger blow out of him in a forceful sigh. He turns his back to you and shuffles Jisung out of the room.
“Typical.” You mutter sourly. Of course he’d back down, that’s what he always does, and it pisses you off more than it had any right to. “You’re a disgrace to predator hybrids everywhere.”
That gets a reaction out of him.
Chan slams the door behind Jisung and whips around towards you, eyes glowing red. “I’ve had just about enough of your shit, little fox.”
You pause for a second, frozen with fear as his figure looms above you, all his anger returning with full force. But as you’ve been told before, your curiosity will be the death of you, and you can’t help but want to see if you push him a little more, will he let you or will he finally retaliate?
So you go against every survival instinct you hold in your body and wrap your arms around the neck of the wolf who was regarding you with fury, and the action is so unexpected that it makes him falter.
“You should make it up to me, you know?” You purr, pulling him closer to you, even though your heart is beating like crazy in your chest. It takes him by surprise too, and his eyes widen from their glare. "What are you doing?"
"You keep taking away all my boy toys so I think it’s only fair that you be a good pup and fill up the void you’ve created." You lean up, kissing his lips. He goes rigid against you, and you wonder if the moment has finally come when someone puts you in your place. Well, it was worth a shot.
But just as you’re about to let your panic overwhelm you, Chan returns the kiss, his hand wrapping around your waist and pulling you to his body as he deeps the kiss. The hard muscles you feel against you steal your breath. He could snap you in half if he wanted to, but that only makes you want to test him more.
You pull at his shirt pointedly and he steps back and lifts his arms up, letting you slip the shirt off him. He was as ripped as he felt, and the knowledge fills you up to the brim with the urge to subjugate him, to make this powerful wolf kneel for you.
You push him to the bed and climb over him, sitting down over his growing erection and rocking your hips over it, making him groan lowly. “Are you going to be a good puppy for me, Channie?”
He frowns at your words, but gets easily distracted when you take your top off, his gaze getting glued to your chest.
“You like this, baby?” You smirk, cupping your bra-covered breasts. “Want to see more?”
He nods eagerly, his hands coming up towards your chest, but you slap them down. “No, bad dog!”
He reels back like a kicked puppy, confused on what he did wrong, so you elaborate. “That’s not how we ask for something, baby.”
Annoyance covers his face again and in a split second he flips the both of you over so he’s now on top. "I'm not a fucking pet."
You cup his cheek gently, "No? From the way you act, one would think that you’re practically begging for someone to collar you up and make you their obedient little puppy."
He starts growling again, baring his teeth at you, but you don’t back down, wrapping both your hands around his thick neck, mimicking a collar. “I can be your master, Channie. You just need to be good for me.”
You can feel the raw power coiled in the muscles under your fingertips, just ready to spring and tear you apart. He could overpower you if he wanted, but this isn’t a battle of physical strength. You know it. He knows it. And he stays.
"Good boy."
He shudders at the praise, liking it a bit too much for someone who just threw a fuss about being treated like a pet. "Of course you like that. You're just an oversized lap dog, aren’t you?"
“You’re pushing it.” He snarls, pulling back to yank your bra off, not even bothering to unhook it first. He doesn’t stop for a second as your pants go next, followed by your panties. You can feel his strength as he tears your clothes off your body but you just find his frustration amusing. He hates this but he can’t stop. It’s different from your normal dynamic with boys, he’s motivated by anger rather than fear, but the end result is the same. 
When he goes to bury his face in your pussy, you grab him by the hair and pull him back. "No."
He stops resisting at once, looking absolutely dejected at the denial. You fake a sympathetic look. "What's wrong, pup? You want it?” You spread your legs and move a hand over your pussy, playing with it a little, teasing him. You’re so turned on that you don’t have to fake the gasp that slips out of you when your fingers touch your clit, and he responds with a low whine coming from the back of his throat. "Use your words, puppy."
"I want it."
"Then strip for me, baby."
He obeys, quickly kicking his pants and boxers down and confidently displaying himself to you, making you scoff. "Of course you're big."
That takes him aback. "That's bad?" He unconsciously pouts, obviously not anticipating the disdain in your voice. He was probably always praised for being so well-endowed.
"It's like everything else on you, just for show. I bet you don't know how to use it and you'll just impale me with it. No thanks." You try to push him away, but pushes you back down.
"Scared of my cock, little fox?" He mocks, hands nudging your knees apart. "I thought you were gonna own me."
"I'm not fucking scared." You seethe, “I just don’t want you to waste my time more than you already have.”
"You play too much, foxy.” He drawls, and you watch warily as he brings two of his fingers to his mouth to wet them before he slips them between your legs. “You wanted me. Now you're going to get me." He says before unceremoniously pushing his fingers inside you.
"Shit, so tight." He pumps his fingers in and out of you, moaning at the feeling of your walls hugging his fingers tightly.  "Gonna fuck this sweet little pussy wide open, baby."
You couldn’t bear hearing him talking so condescendingly to you. You were supposed to be the one in control here, not the spineless wolf who seemed to grow enough balls to fight back all of a sudden.
"If you're going to be so vulgar, I know a better use for your dirty tongue." You sneer, pushing his head down your body. He goes along easily, his plush lips caressing your skin on the way down, his kisses getting wetter along the way until his mouth meets your pussy in a messy, open-mouthed kiss.
You can't even fight back the moans he elicits from you. He is really good with his mouth and his fingers fill you up just right that you feel yourself slipping. You need to turn this in your favor.
“Good boy.” You breathe, attempting to make it seem like you were still in control of yourself and not falling apart on his fingers and mouth. "Finally something you can do right."
Seeing through your weak attempt--and perhaps in retaliation-- he bites down on the inside of your thigh, his sharp canines almost breaking the skin. But an even sharper sensation quickly diverts your attention as he pushes a third finger inside you. You cry out, nails digging into his scalp as you pull on his hair in pain, but it doesn't phase him. He's determined to work you open with his fingers, his mouth going back on you to take some of the edge away, having the time of his life if his wet, muffled moans against your pussy are anything to go by.
And when the slide of his fingers gets a little dry, he pulls his fingers out and puts them in his mouth, getting them wet again, his eyes meeting your half-lidded ones as he makes a show of lathering his fingers with his saliva, moaning hungrily at the taste of you, before he plunges his fingers back inside you. He does this a few times, each time making you feel both relief and frustration--relief that his fingers are giving your poor pussy a break and frustration that he’s taking his sinful mouth away from you. But with every time, it gets easier and easier to take his fingers again. Until, the fourth time he does it, your hand clasps around his wrist, keeping it in place as you whine and fuck yourself on his fingers.
"Fuck." He breathes out, climbing back up your body to latch his mouth on your neck, and growling lowly. "Getting needy, little fox?"
You groan, yanking on his hair harshly and ripping his mouth away from your neck. "I wouldn't be like this if you weren't sabotaging every chance I get at a fuck."
"Oh, it's gonna get much worse for you, baby. I'm going to stretch this pretty pussy out with my big, fat cock, until I ruin you for all your pretty boys." The audacity of this guy.
“You’re so fucking full of yourself. If you think that you can dom me with your dumb cock then you’re--” You cut yourself off, face paling as he pulls his fingers out and presses the blunt head of his cock against your opening. He looks at you expectantly, eye-brow raised as he waits for you to continue your rant, but you bite down on your tongue, refusing to give him what he wants.
“What’s wrong, foxy? Got nothing more to say about me and my dumb cock?” He grins, easing his dick inside you, stretching you even more than his fingers did. “Don’t you wanna tell me more about how unaffected you are by all of this?”
You glare at him, your fingers digging into his shoulder blades, drawing blood, yet the grin on his face never falters. When he’s halfway inside you, you can’t keep quiet anymore. “Fuck… you’re going to split me open.” You grit out and his hips jerk a little, pushing more of him inside you suddenly. A scream escapes you before you bite down on your lips. “Fucking mutt! Can’t you control yourself?”
“How can I when you’re so sweet to me?” He bites at you, voice getting rougher and breath getting heavier. He’s starting to lose control too. You realize that this is your chance to reclaim the upper hand. So you wrap your legs around his hips and, through gritted teeth, you steel your breath and pull him closer, pushing him the rest of the way inside you.
“Ah fuck!” Chan groans, face falling in the crook of your neck as you hold him up to the hilt inside of you, your walls clamping down on his dick, trying to push him outside. He tries to rock his hips into you but you hold him in place with your legs, making him quickly grow impatient. "Baby, let me move." He whines, mouthing at your breasts, sucking stinging kisses all over them as he lets out his frustration on your poor tits.
"No. You don't deserve it." You grit out, "You've been a bad dog."
To your surprise, he moans out at your words, bucking against you once again, the force of it allowing him to move inside you just a bit and you yelp, scratching at his back and biting onto his shoulders in response, but that only seems to make his hips rut against you more.
"You like that, don't you?” You hiss mockingly, “Are you getting off on me being mean to you, Channie?"
“You're such a fucking bitch." He barks, grabbing your thighs and splitting your legs open harshly, pinning them down on the bed so he could finally start fucking you.
“Shit---shit!” You squeak, the drag of his cock against your walls burning, and you find yourself clinging to him as tears prickle at your eyes. You try to hide your face in his chest, but he hears your little sniffles anyway, and his reaction isn’t what you expected--not the concerned tone of his voice as he cups your face and asks you if you’re okay, and not the hunger in his eyes that only seems to get darker at the sight of your tears.
It’s with a start that you finally realize the situation, and you can’t help but laugh despite your tears. "You dirty fucking dog. You’re loving this, aren’t you?”
It's your turn to grab his face and make him face you as he tries to look away. "Does hurting me turn you on, Channie? And here you were trying to act like a fucking savior."
"It's n-not like that." He shakes his head, yet his hips never stop moving.
"No? Dumb mutt can't even still his hips long enough to lie. Is this what secretly gets saint Chan's rocks off? Are you like this with your bitches or is this just for me, baby?"
He sucks in a sharp breath, eyes squeezed shut as he mumbles something that you don’t quite catch.
"Speak up dog." You slap him lightly, and his eyes gain back a little of their sharpness as he looks down at you.
"No. They can handle it. It's only you that is breaking on my cock." He grits, hips driving into you faster as he fucks you with his eyes as much as he fucks you with his dick that you weren't made to be on the receiving end of.
"So that's it then, you like knowing you're the biggest I've ever had?” You ask breathlessly, trying to hold onto your sanity as he takes you roughly. “You enjoy watching me struggle to even take you in?"
He stays quiet, but the sharp snap of his hips against yours gives you all the answer you need.
"Dirty mutt." You croon, tugging at his sweaty bangs so you can keep them away from his face so you can see his reaction to your words. "I bet you cum a lot too, would be absolutely dripping from my tight cunt."
"Oh, god, have mercy." He cries out, pace getting erratic as the combination of your filthy words and your tight pussy start getting to him.
"Who knew I didn't even have to fight you? All I had to do was let your filthy brain and your dirty cock work you up to this state. You really are just an animal after all." You bring his lips to yours, swallowing down his pathetic protests, the frantic grind of his member in and out of you suddenly feeling erotic now that the big wolf was a whimpering mess in your arms. Pulling back, your wet mouths still stringed together with saliva, you prompt, "Aren't you, baby?"
The breath hitches in his throat as you clench down on him, your sore pussy finally feeling the pleasure he's forcing on you, and it manifests with a vengeance, intense and dizzying. "Y-yeah."
"Tell me." You demand, kissing along his clenched jaw.
"I'm just an animal." He pants as you suck a bruise under his ear. "I love fucking your little pussy with my big cock. I love making you cry. I love you being mean to me. I love you treating me like a dog. I love it all."
"That's a good boy." You praise, kissing him again and he can barely breathe from the heat of it all. "Cum for me, puppy. Stuff me full with your seed like I know you wanna."
Almost as if on command, he cums, chanting a mantra of "thank you, thank you, thank you" in your ear.
"Yeah, let it all out, pup." You massage his ass as his hips stutter against you. "Want you dripping out of me for days."
"Fuck...you're gonna kill me." He heaves as his cock spurts out the last of his cum, and you smile in victory. You did it. You've subjugated him.
He sits up as he pulls out of you, watching darkly as his cums trickles out of you. Cursing, he quickly scoops it up and pushes it back in, the slide of his fingers so much easier now that you've taken his cock, and the copious amount of his cum making it way too easy.
His fingers are a blur as he pumps them in and out of you and it hardly takes any time before you're grabbing his wrist to stop him as you cum. But he doesn't. He fucks you through your orgasm, not even slowing down as he pins your thighs to the bed and continues railing his fingers into you, tearing a second orgasm out of you before the first one even has a chance to fade.
"Chan, stop." You cry out, body convulsing on the mattress, and he looks up from your cunt to see your pained face, and he finally stops, quickly taking his fingers out and wiping them on the bed before climbing up your body and catching your mouth in a kiss.
He murmurs little praises against your mouth like “you took me so well, baby” and “you did so good”, and it makes you grimace even more. You attempt to push him off of you, but you have no strength left to fight him off. Not that you ever did in the first place.
"Stop that!" You snap at him, and he stops.
"What’s wrong, baby? Was I too rough?"
You snort, "What do you think?" You gesture to your body that was now sore all over and probably developing bruises.
"Shit, I'm sorry. You just got in my head." He breathes out a flustered laugh.
“I know.” You apparently still have enough energy in you to gloat. 
He frowns but ignores your comment, just watching as you wince whenever you try to move. "I can take you back to my place if you're too tired to go back to yours."
"Yeah, no shit you will." You confirm, having already decided that in your head. He did this to you. It's only right that he should take care of you after.
"Oh, okay ummm… let's get you dressed then." He quickly stands up to get you your clothes, only to realize that he tore most of it apart. "Ah, shit."
You roll your eyes, "Give me that." You say, pointing to his oversized shirt. He rushes to bring it to you and helps you put it on, the process a little tricky as the events of the night catch up with your body.
He smoothes your hair down once you're done and carasses your cheek, giving you a look that you don't like one bit so you smack his hand away and point a finger at him, "Hey! There will be none of that. You hear me?"
His face quickly straightens out and he snorts, "Excuse me for trying to treat you like a lady."
"Oh, fuck off." You stand up on shaky legs, and you can already tell that this will take a few days to wear off. "Let's go." ____________________________________ A/N: so came out as the victor after all? it’s really up for debate lol
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"Are you just using me for my body?" feat. Asmodeus
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pairing: Asmodeus x Female!Reader
warnings: mentions of smut, distrust, mentions of cheating
A/N: this got REALLy emotional...
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Being the Avatar of Lust and all, Asmodeus couldn't help but have desires outside his absolute adoration of you and you alone; other than himself that is.
He was so sweet all the time, never once forced you to do anything with him, and waited patiently until you knew you were ready.
You loved Asmodeus with your whole heart and had confidence that he wouldn't cheat on you.
Asmodeus was many things, but a liar was not one of them.
Until now, it had been especially hard to keep a steady relationship with his desires rampant and constantly filling up his mind. Ever since he started to get to know you and realize his feelings for you, he stopped sleeping around as much until it came to a complete halt.
He really wanted to be with you, he realized, and he'd give up anything if only it meant he could spend every minute you were here with him.
Here you were, completely in tune and comfortable with each other, but come comments from demons at school today had flooded you with doubt.
You hated yourself for mistrusting your best friend and boyfriend, especially after working so hard to get where you are.
That thought alone makes you burst into tears.
Asmo, who was snuggling happily against your chest, had noticed something off about you and decided against asking if you wanted to fuck. He simply pulled you into bed with him, shared a kiss with you, and planted his face on your pillowy chest, hands caressing your sides oh so gently.
You were so pretty...
What was he going to do with you?
He should see what was the matter.
Maybe it was a test coming up, or an unfinished homework assignment, possibly a teacher being rude to you again, but worrying causes wrinkles! With or without them you would continue to be divine, but still!
At that moment, he heard a choked sob slip past your lips.
Worried, he regrettably peeled himself off of you and saw that you were hiccupping into your hand, trying to stop yourself from crying and making a mess of yourself and Asmo's bed.
"Oh, sweetie..." Asmo murmured, pulling you into his lap, "You can go ahead and cry, don't hold it in like this!"
With his permission, you start crying like a baby into his shoulder.
He held your head, pressing kisses to your temple and rocking you gently from side to side.
"Oh, baby..." He whispers, patting your back, "You have to tell me when you're feeling bad... Don't bottle everything up."
You sob an 'I'm sorry', but Asmodeus wouldn't hear it.
"Don't you dare apologize for crying. I'm right here for you, always. Okay?"
That only made you cry harder.
'Worried' could describe Asmo when he first gathered you into his arms. 'Panicking' is how the demon was feeling when you refused to stop sobbing into his shoulder.
Something was seriously wrong and he needed to get to the bottom of it before it became difficult for you to breathe and you got even more panicked.
"Baby, hey, look at me sweetheart," He murmurs, lifting your head up to face him, "You've gotta stop crying, okay? Can you try and calm down for me? I know you can do it, just take deep breaths for me, kay?"
You wiped your eyes on your sleeves way too harshly for his liking, and he grasped your wrists and put them in your lap.
"Inhale with me, come on sweets, you can do it."
You try to inhale, but your lips trembles and you can't help but let out another sob or two, covering your face in your hand, muttering apologies and trembling.
Asmodeus tried again, pulling your hands down and holding his face in his hands, showing you how to take deep breaths and holding your gaze and refusing to let it go.
"Yes, good job!" He smiled rubbing your lower back when you began mimicking his example, "I knew you could do it, hey, don't stop yet honey, you're really wound up..."
You pull your eyes away from his with great effort as it was unbearable to stare into those earnest sunset eyes any longer.
You were repulsed at the thoughts clouding your mind.
How could you call yourself a good girlfriend? You were terrible really, doubting the man you called your boyfriend and lover the moment the shadow of jealousy turned into a rumor.
You apologized again, gripping his hand tightly.
"What did I say?" He says gently, patting your thigh, "No apologies for showing emotion. Got it?"
You nod mutely.
"Asmo?"
"Yes baby?"
"Are you... Are you just using me for my body?"
You felt him stiffen.
Tears flooded your eyes again, dripping into your lap before you could stop them.
Asmo opened his mouth, then shut it again.
Of... Of course, he wasn't... He didn't need anyone else, only you.
Why didn't you trust him?
All these months of bonding behind closed doors, Asmodeus fighting his sin so vehemently he forgot who 'Asmodeus' really was, and hours upon hours of just thinking about how beautiful you were and that you deserved better than him. He had just begun to believe that maybe, just maybe he was worthy of your limitless affection, but it was not so.
You... You never trusted him in the first place, did you?
"A-Asmo I know what you're thinking and I'm sorry-"
"No apologies." He whispered airily, eyes locked on a singular rose, one of many that had wound their way up the bedpost.
The response was empty of emotion, as was Asmodeus's face.
"Oh Asmo, you've always been so good to me. I know you'd never cheat on me after going through so much pain-"
"Who said it?"
"Wha-"
"WHO SAID IT?" Asmodeus had flashed into his demon form, angry tears spilling from his eyes as he stood in front of you, exuding rage, hatred, and most of all, despair.
Out of everything he was feeling at the moment, none of those potent emotions were aimed at you.
"YOU'RE TOO PERFECT TO COME UP WITH THAT IDEA ON YOUR OWN." He screeched, "YOU KNOW I'D NEVER BETRAY ANYONE I LOVE, WHAT DEMON IS SPREADING BULLSHIT ABOUT ME AND COSTING ME YOUR TRUST?"
You were terrified, staring up at the enraged demon, tears soaking your cheeks once again, "Asmo, please! Calm down! You're above them!"
Mascara tears lined his cheeks, and he was just about to shout something else at you, but the door to his room was suddenly blown off its hinges, giving way to six more demons with their horns out, Lucifer in the lead.
He looked absolutely livid, especially after seeing the state you were in.
Asmodeus had the nerve to shout at you? Under any circumstance?
Not in the least.
"Stop this at once, Asmodeus!" He growled, standing his ground in front of you, "Any reason you have to be angry at MC can be taken up to me! Control yourself!"
"Lucifer stop!" You plead, "Don't yell at him like that-"
"Quiet, MC." He hissed, "You need to get out of here. He's too high-strung at the moment. He needs to be alone."
The larger demon grabbed you by the arm and started pulling you out of the room, but you fought against him, punching and crying and yelling at him to let go.
Mammon tried to step in and explain that Lucifer was "jus' tryna keep ya safe!" but you weren't having it and slugged him in the nose.
He screeched as blood started pouring out of his face, Lucifer loosened his grip when he heard his brother in pain he hadn't caused and you managed to tug your limb away from him and rush to your boyfriend who had collapsed onto the floor, face in his hands and sobbing.
His wings and horns were gone, but you wouldn't have cared either way as you tackled him in a hug and refused to let go.
Asmodeus latched onto you as well, and the brothers knew there was nothing they could do about it.
Lucifer pulled Mammon away to fix his bloody and possibly broken nose, and the others stood at the ready outside the door in case something else went wrong.
For a long time, you and the Avatar of Lust simply lay in each other's arms and cried.
It felt good to comfort and be comforted.
After a few hours, both of you were dried up, holding hands and staring sadly at the ceiling.
Asmodeus spoke first.
"Do you... Do you really think I've been using you for your beautiful body all this time? I'm not accusing you of anything, I need to know."
His voice was hoarse and quiet; tentative almost.
"I never thought that, Asmodeus. I the human world, there were some bad guys I was with and I guess I was prepared to accept it if you were. You've changed vastly since I first met you and you're nothing like those swine up there." You whispered, squeezing his hand before turning to look at him, "It was a stressful week and then, on top of that, I heard some demons talking about you so I stopped to listen. They were saying such terrible things about you; how you cheat on me every chance you got, you're just using me as an exotic fleshlight, and shit like that. We... We haven't had sex in a while so I just wondered if you'd gotten tired of me. Then, when we were cuddling, I just couldn't push those thoughts out of my head and I couldn't stop myself from crying..."
Asmodeus nursed at his lower lip, scooting closer to you, suddenly cold.
"I could never grow tired of you, MC. You have and continue to inspire me to be better for you and myself. I actually..." He giggled sweetly, resting his forehead against your own, "I was gonna ask if you wanted to bang when you first came into my room. Sex really is the answer to everything, isn't it?"
You smile and shake your head, "Not now though, you need some dinner and some rest."
He pouts cutely, ticking your sides, but he knows you're right.
You snatch his hands away from you and kiss his knuckles, "I never meant to make you think of yourself any less, because you really are perfect, Asmo. No one has ever tried to make me happy like you do and willingly spent all of this time with me. You make me feel so loved... I don't know how to thank you. I just want you to know that I love you."
He's literally glowing at your words, wrapping you tightly in his arms and whispering, "I love you too MC. More than I could possibly say."
--
July 7th: TWO. MORE. DAYS!!! (for us VIP members)
could you imagine being loved that much?? holy FUCK. is my giant single pringle ass showing? is it too obvious I'm lonely?
the shit I write... it surprises ME sometimes
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hwascripts · 3 years
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What Izuku would be like in a relationship: The positive traits, the toxic traits, his love language, my own personal headcanons and an overall conclusion
WC: unknown
TW// POTENTIAL SPOILERS, No smut but Izuku is aged up, Toxic traits aren’t necessarily toxic...more so just bad traits, Teeny tiny little bit of angst, I think that’s it!
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Disclaimer: I am in no way claiming the following headcanons are true. You are 100% free to disagree with me but please DO NOT send me hateful comments or asks. I am simply writing what I think Deku would be like in a relationship
a/n: Just to let you know, your nickname for him is Zuku just so you don’t think I kept spelling his name wrong.
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-Deku is literally the kindest soul ever and it makes me want to cry. He’d give you his umbrella if you ever forgot yours, he’d literally carry you to first aid if you ever injure yourself- this man will legitimately do everything for you
-He’s incredibly observant. If he catches you looking at a pretty ring then he’ll literally show up at your door days later with that very same ring in his hands
“I saw you looking at it a few days ago and I wanted to surprise you!”
“Zuku baby oh my god how much did you spend?!”
“You don’t need to worry about it sunshine”
I wholeheartedly believe Izuku would call you his sunshine or something along those lines
-I have this one headcanon of him drawing you all the time as an excuse to “observe you and your quirk” but it’s really just because he wants to admire the way you shine underneath the sun- and that’s how he came up with the name Sunshine for you
-Deku has a heart of gold oh my god, this guy cares so much about you it’s unreal. Imagine trying to hide the fact that you’ve been crying while on a phone call- mission failed because he heard your shaky voice and now he’s on your doorstep with your favourite hoodie of his and your favourite snacks
-His memory is insanely good, like it’s freaky how good it is. Like you mentioned to him ONCE that you liked a certain drink and now he pulls up to your dates with that drink all the time (not like I’d complain if Deku brought me my favourite drink)
-Just like Bakugou, Deku is incredibly smart and he literally always comes up with a solution. You could literally vent to him about a problem you’re having at work and he’s come up with at least 73 solutions within 6 hours
-He’s determined and hardworking. Again, he’s just like Bakugou in the sense that he’ll put his blood, sweat and tears into whatever he’s doing- no matter if it’s a serious high stake mission or something like planning your weekly date. The second he puts his mind to something, he makes sure to give it his all.
-Izuku is your own personal cheerleader, this dude will hype you up no matter what. Training after work? he’s cheering for you. You completed a really difficult task? you better believe he’s gonna pat you on the back for it.
-He’s very protective of you. Remember when the LOV attacked the training camp and he rushed to find Kota? yeah he’s 10x more protective of you.
-And it’s not because he thinks you’re weak and can’t defend yourself, it’s because he genuinely worries about you all the time and just wants to make sure your always safe
-He’s an inspirational person, he makes you hella motivated to do even the most boring chores around the house
-Deku isn’t afraid to show his emotions. Unlike Bakugou, he’s often seen showing his emotions. Deku said “toxic masculinity who?”. He definitely gives 0 fucks if someone sees him crying/upset because I feel like Pro-Hero Deku would stop the stupid mindset of “Hero’s can’t show their genuine emotions”
-Izuku is the type of person to analyze all his losses, figure out what he did wrong and then learn from it to make sure he doesn’t make the same mistake again. He’s the complete opposite of Bakugou who gets bitter over his losses due to his superiority complex.
-He’s so good at comforting you that it’s unbelievable. Deku gives the warmest hugs that make you feel so safe- you literally cannot change my mind about this
-You know those hugs where the other person lightly rubs your back and lightly sways side to side with you? Yeah those are the hugs that Deku gives (he’d definitely give you a sweet little kiss on the forehead/cheek)
“Sunshine come here, let me hold you while you let out all your frustrations. I’ve got you, nothing can hurt you while you’re here with me”
-Can you tell I want some comforting Izuku hugs? He wouldn’t let go of you until he put a smile back on your face and GAHH oh my god I need Izuku hugs
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-As much as I hate to do this, it needs to be done 😔✊🏻
-Izuku is such an over thinker, this guy worries about EVERYTHING under the sun. Your eyes didnt crinkle when you smiled? he’ll think you’re upset with him. You gave him a side hug rather than a normal hug? he’ll think he did something wrong.
-He’s self aware that he overthinks things but he just can’t seem to stop his thoughts. No matter how many times you reassure him that you aren’t upset with him, he’s subconsciously thinking about how to make it up to you
-He constantly pushes himself past his limits. You guys saw how many times he’s broken his bones. Deku may be intelligent but when it comes to his own self he can be completely hopeless
-The amount of times you’ve scolded him while you clean up his scrapes and cuts is insane. He just sits on the toilet lid and bites his lip nervously while you wave your finger angrily at him
“Sunshine please, I said I was sorry and that it won’t happen again!”
“Zuku you and I both know that’s a damn lie, I’ve had to patch you up 3 times this week! When are you going to start being more considerate of your limits?”
-I’m sorry but I picture him being so nervous to initiate anything with you. This guy would be so fidgety just by THINKING about holding your hand
-And deep down he knows he’s being ridiculous because come on, you’re his S/O and he’s been dating you for years now- why does he still get shaken up just by holding your hand?
-At first you think it’s cute, he’s just being respectful of your boundaries- but as time goes on you kind of get a little annoyed because he always asks you a bunch of times if you’re okay with him being affectionate.
“Zuku...sweetheart you know you don’t need to ask me a million times if I want to cuddle, right? I love cuddling with you!”
*cue sweating* “I’ll keep that in mind, Sunshine”
-He eventually gets a lot more comfortable with affection...more often than not you wake up with him nuzzled into your side like a cat
(Side note PLEASE wake him up with a bunch of kisses, he’ll literally melt)
-He’s very insecure about his scars because they make him feel like he’s “ugly” and sometimes he doesn’t even want you to look at them
-Do me a favour and please kiss along his scars/ trace them with your fingers while you compliment him- he’ll start crying because the scars he thought made him ugly are now starting to look beautiful to him
-This isn’t necessarily a toxic trait, more like a bad habit. Whenever Izuku gets stressed he’ll train himself to the brink of exhaustion just so he can try to focus on something other than how stressed he is
-Again, not a toxic trait but a bad one...Deku puts everyone else before himself. Which isn’t a bad thing if it’s done in a healthy amount, but Izuku goes to the extreme. I feel like he’d neglect his own needs just to satisfy everyone else and you’d have to intervene before it gets worse
“Sunshine I said I was fine, you don’t need to worry about me! Your Zuku is perfectly energized and ready to go”
“Zuku don’t lie to me, you know I can read you like a book. You’re coming with me and I’m putting you to bed”
-I hate to say it but this guy hates confrontation so much that sometimes he’ll suffer in silence for MONTHS before he even hints at being upset with something
-I honestly think your biggest argument with him would be about his lack of communication in terms of him not being completely honest about how he feels and he just breaks down-
-Like he has a really bad breakdown because he’s been bottling everything up for so long because he hates the idea of fighting with you.
-And now he’s sobbing because he’s so frustrated that he doesn’t know what else to do
-Anyways, the two of you just silently comfort each other until you’ve both calmed down enough to talk properly. This is the night Izuku finally starts opening up to you rather than bottling up every negative emotion he feels
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-I honestly think his love language is a mixture of giving you gifts and words of praise
-He’s a little shy when it comes to showing you how he feels through affection, so giving you gifts and his praise get his point across
-He’s totally the type to send you cute messages throughout the day, send cute selfies when he misses you, or he just sends you a random bouquet of flowers because he saw them and thought of you
-Also the type of guy to have photos of the two of you displayed around his office. His most prized one being the photo of your first mission together
-Just warning you now that if you ever mention that your suit ripped or a certain item isn’t functioning properly then he’ll literally buy 10 replacements- each one better than the last
“Zuku I said that the sole of my BOOT ripped off, not my entire suit!”
“Well now you have 10 new upgraded suits to make sure it won’t happen again! Isn’t it great, Sunshine?”
(Someone take his credit card away from him)
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I definitely think Izuku would be an amazing S/O! He’s caring, kind and comforting- and he does his very best to try and work on the bad habits he has.
Overall, I would say Izuku definitely would win a “S/O of the year award” (sorry Bakugou)
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robinofgothamcity · 3 years
Text
♡ prompt: “i thought you were dead? for years, i thought you were dead! and i hate that i still love you and never moved on!” 
♡ pairing: tim drake (red robin) x fem! reader
♡ lyric inspiration: “you’re riding high in April, shot down in May but I know I’m going to change that tune when I’m back on top in June. I said that’s life and as funny as that may seem, some people get their kicks stomping on a dream.”
♡ note: not checked for grammar or spelling mistakes / please check the pinned tweet please! since i’m very low on inspiration.
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Tim Drake stared at you, mouth wide open, not knowing what to say or do. he felt like he saw a ghost. you were standing across the room, talking amongst others as they instantly crowded around you. everyone had thought the same thing Tim did and only a selective few knew about your whereabouts. 
you were giving Dick a hug, whispering in his ear about how much you missed him as Damian stood there dumbfounded. Jason was not in the room or else you knew that he would be giving you an earful about the entire situation. Jason always did think of you as a sister when you first started dating Tim. 
“what the fuck happened to you?” Damian screamed, finally coming into the realization of the situation, “you were dead! we saw you die! all of us did!” he continued. you bent down, giving him a hug as he didn’t bother to try and deny it. 
“it’s a long story. i was under secrecy for a long time and couldn’t tell or say anything without me getting caught,” you told him. you looked to Dick who still couldn’t believe what was going on, “it must’ve been a monumental mission if you were technically dead for three years and I couldn’t know about it,” he replied. 
you nodded, whispering to him that you’d tell them the details later, “is...he around?” you asked, referencing Tim. Dick moved a bit to the left, revealing the man you were still madly in love with. you felt yourself gulp, scared on his reaction, “oh god, I never realized how bad this is,” Dick whispered to himself, sensing the tension immediately. 
+
you swinging around the Batcave, Batman clearly annoyed with your antics as you finally plopped down next to him, “aww c’mon Bruce! live a little! this Batcave is so depressing and need I say, dark?” you said, hearing the door jingle open. 
“great, the boys are here,” he murmured, realizing that introductions had to happen between you and his sons. Bruce had taken you in a few months ago, under the guise that you needed a better mentor, “you haven’t met them, right?” he asked. 
you shook your head no, “course I haven’t! it’s my first week in Gotham!” you exclaimed happily. you did hero work out of the west coast and happened to finally land in Gotham for the first time ever, “although I did run into Damian earlier in the week so I think he’ll recognize me!” 
Tim and Dick were the ones who walked in, conversing about some Gotham football game. you smiled at the two boys as they stopped dead in their tracks, “uh....Bruce, who is this?” Dick asked, pointing at you. you stood up, shaking their hands, “I’m ( your name )! Bruce’s new apprentice!” you explained. 
the two sighed, Dick’s first thought being if Alfred knew about you. Tim on the other hand didn’t exactly respond as quick. you were oddly excitable, not exactly the personality that ran rampant across the ‘family’, “apprentice or daughter?” Dick asked, a bit playfully. 
“she’s an apprentice. no need to adopt someone who’s already an adult,” he replied as he stood up himself, “she came from the west coast so she doesn’t exactly know her way around here. it’d be helpful if one of you showed her around. I don’t trust Jason or Damian enough,” he said, walking to another one of the computers. 
“Stephanie isn’t around?” Damian asked, walking inside of the cave, “she’s already acquainted with her and she isn’t available to do it right now so it’s up to Dick or you Tim,” Bruce repeated. Dick looked to his brother with his eyebrow lifted up, “well?” he asked Tim. 
the two of them went to look at you who was already not paying attention to what was going on. you were nose deep into a computer with music blaring inside of your headphones, “I swear that girl has ADHD or something,” Damian murmured to his brothers, “but I think Drake should do it! you just love getting to know people, don’t you?” Damian pressured. 
Bruce nodded in agreement, “it’s settled, you’re showing her around!” Tim stared at Damian, ready to attack the gremlin with his bare hands, “appreciate it Tim!” you yelled from your seat, surprising the three who thought you couldn’t hear what they were saying. 
+
it was already a few months into your internship with the Batfamily. you had gotten closer with Jason, Stephanie, and because of your relationship with Dick, you befriended Starfire as well. even though your work was constantly surrounding you around Tim, you weren’t around him much unless it had to do with work. 
“where you heading off too?” Jason asked, seeing you all dressed up, “Star, Barbara, and Steph wanted to go out for the night since we aren’t on duty so we’re going to get drinks up the street,” you told him. he nodded, looking to Tim and seeing the way he was checking you out, “why do you go with them, Tim?” he asked. 
Tim looked at Jason with a bewildered expression, “why would I be the only guy in the group?” he asked sarcastically. you on the other hand jumped up in joy, “you should!” you exclaimed, “come on! it would be amazing! you know you want too!” you poked Tim’s side in anticipation. 
he sighed, slipping a bit on the couch, “fine,” he muttered, making you excited all over again. you gave him a few minutes to get himself together, “you know he likes you, right?” Jason told you. you laughed out of genuine shock, “who? Tim? yeah right!” you let out another laugh, not believing he was lying to your face, “fine, don’t believe me but it’s pretty obvious.” 
you couldn’t say much else as Tim walked out, hair restyled and threw on a different jacket, “ready?” he asked, hands deep in his pockets. you nodded, throwing Jason a scrap piece of paper before heading out the door as Dick walked inside, “meeting the girls?” he asked. 
“yeah and I’m taking your brother as a hostage,” Dick was surprised, “did you finally?” he started to ask before Tim screamed at him to shut up, “how about we leave,” Tim told you, discreetly hitting Dick on the back of his leg as retaliation. 
the two of you walked out as you told Tim that the place you usually went out with the girls was in walking distance, “I think they’re going to be surprised you even decided to leave your apartment,” you joked as he rolled his eyes playfully, “I don’t think they’ll mind. at least Stephanie can stop saying that I never go out,” he said. 
you laughed softly, “yeah you might be going out with a bunch of girls but it sure beats being stuck inside playing video games or doing work,” you replied, “yeah, guess your right,” you two walked inside of the restaurant, already seeing Steph, Starfire, and Barbara sitting at the usual table. 
the three girls had their mouth hanging as they saw you walking in with Tim, “he actually came out?” Barbara screamed, not believing Tim was actually out, “yeah, figured it was better than staying in for the night!” you said excitedly. 
“I couldn’t even get him to come out with me at times and I dated him,” Steph murmured under her breath to Star. she laughed as you pulled chairs for you and Tim, “I’m getting first round of shots!” you told the group excitedly. Star and Barbara had followed you to the bar, leaving Steph and Tim in a small awkward silence 
“you like her don’t you?” she asked. Tim nodded, figuring it was better to just tell the truth than to lie, “that’s cute! she’s a great girl. I’m happy you finally found someone else but I will say one thing, I think you better get a move on with your feels with her because I know a few others who have an interest in her and one might be on your team,” she said, not so subtly hinting at Connor. 
Tim was taken back by what Stephanie was telling her but remained silent, “and I think she’d say yes on Connor so you better be quick,” she laughed, seeing Tim’s slightly jealous eyes. you returned to the table, giving everyone their glass as you raised yours in the air, “to Tim! for actually leaving his house for once!” you screamed as they all raised their glass and took the shot down.
throughout the night, Tim saw the way you were singing and dancing with Steph and Star, your terrible drunk singing voice getting louder as they played ‘poker face’ by lady gaga towards the end of the night. 
+
you stared at Riddler, seeing that he was ready to attack Tim with full intentions to kill him. you debated for a moment, saving a few civilians from getting mildly hurt or seeing your boyfriend get killed? you chose the latter and ran to Tim who was not paying attention in the slightest at what Riddler was doing. 
“Red!” you screamed, your feet moving as fast as they could and pushing him out of the way. you felt the slice of the knife into your stomach as you had successfully pushed Tim to safety, “fuck,” you whispered, seeing the blood already pooling underneath you. 
although you getting hurt was already pre-planned, you had no intentions of getting hurt this badly, “fuck, fuck, fuck,” you continued, trying to grab your cape to stop the bleeding, Tim stared down at you, seeing the blood gushing at a rate too dangerous for his liking, “hold on, please hold on!” he screamed, moving you out of harms way. 
Bruce had saw you giving him the signal, weakly but you still gave it to him. it was your only chance for your pre-planned mission to actually succeed and the start of that plan was to make you die in front of everyone. Bruce had swung down from the stairs, seeing the way your eyes closed. 
“she needs to go to the hospital,” he told Tim, making him rush you to the hospital himself. he knew this was the only time he would be able to say his goodbyes to you and he need to make it count, “go now!” he yelled. 
Tim dragged your almost lifeless body to the nearest hospital, screaming at the staff that you needed help immediately. the nurses grabbed your body, hauling it to the OR as Tim sat there, blood all over his uniform as he watched you get wheeled into the hallway. 
it felt like hours by the time they gave an update to all of them. Bruce, Tim, Dick, Jason, Steph, Barbara, and Damian, were sitting in the waiting area, munching on food nervously as the nurse came out of the hallway, eyes bleary with tears. 
“she didn’t make it out of surgery. she passed.” 
all of them (for the exception of Bruce), immediately bursted into tears. Tim more than anyone had fell to the ground, having no control of his body as he screamed that it couldn’t be true and that you weren’t actually gone. a part of Bruce’s heart broke seeing his son having a mental breakdown but he knew for their safety and yours, he couldn’t say a word. 
the following days were left to plan your funeral as the nurses who relied your wishes stated that you wanted a closed casket for no one, not even Tim, to see your dead body. Tim hadn’t spoken a word to anyone as he only spoke up when it came for him to plan your arrangements. 
they buried your casket with your uniform laying on top of it as they all saw your casket get lower and lower to the ground. Tim was by this point sobbing as he couldn’t have cared who saw and who didn’t. 
+
Dick grabbed Damian, moving themselves to another part of the room as you walked slowly to Tim. he had yet to say anything but as soon as you locked eyes with him, you both let out sobs to each other. Tim grabbed you by the arms, bringing you into a hug as he sobbed into your shoulders. 
“what the fuck is going on?” he yelled, not knowing what to say, “I’m alive Timmy. I didn’t die that night,” you practically sobbed back to him. he released you, now anger and sadness crossing over him, “what the fuck do you mean you didn’t die?” he screamed, scaring Dick and Damian in the process. 
you sat on the ground, trying to compose yourself, “I went on an undercover mission for league. I had to die in order to protect not only myself but all of you and the entire league. which explains why I look different,” you murmured the last part. 
“I thought you were dead. for years, I thought you were dead! and I hate that I still love you and never moved on!” he exclaimed, seeing the way you stared at him heartbrokenly, “you think I wanted this to happen? it was for the betterment of the league if I took on this mission. I never wanted to leave you or Steph, hell I didn’t want to leave any of you but I had too! it broke my heart knowing what I had to do!” you yelled back. 
Tim bent down, taking you into his arms, “what the hell are we going to do?” he whispered in your ear, not knowing how to respond to any of this rationally. you shrugged as the two of you tried to calm yourselves down from the hysterics you both were throwing, “I just need you here with me,” you whispered back. 
Tim nodded, not releasing you from the hug you were giving him. “I won’t. I won’t let you go! not anymore!” he replied. you laughed through your tears as you heard someone else walk into the room. 
“what the fuck.....” you heard Steph and Jason’s voice scream through the Batcave, “what the FUCK is going on?” they screamed in panic. 
hehehe a cliffhanger 
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watchmegetobsessed · 3 years
Text
Our song - Harry Styles
this one was inspired by the jingleball performance bc it was pure perfection and UGHH im obsessed.
dedicated to my dear friend @dontworrysunflower
disclaimer: the song Homesick by Dua Lipa is featured in this fic as an original work of Harry and the reader, but it’s obviously an existing song, I just thought that it would be the song they write
pairing: Harry x vocalist!reader
word count: 5.3k
masterlist
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You’ve felt the adrenaline rush take over your body many times in your life and they were all different in some kind of way. The one you felt when you were about to write an important test in school, the one that bubbled through your veins when you got your first kiss. The one that rolled through your limbs and chest when you first performed in front of people that weren’t your parents and the one you felt when you got the news that you were chosen to tour with none other than Harry Styles as his vocalist, singing on his stage every other night in a different city and different country.
But none of those were anything like the feeling that takes over every time you stand on that stage, your microphone that’s labelled with your name right in front of you as thousands of people are screaming in the jam-packed arena. Though it’s not you they come to see and listen to, but you are part of the magic and it’s quite enough for you.
You could never be the one standing at the front with all the lights shining down on your frame, having every gaze in the place glued to you, listening to your voice. That brings the kind of anxiety you’re quite sure you wouldn’t be able to handle. You are perfectly fine standing in the back, being the support system while staying on the down-low as someone else shines at the front, in your case, it’s Harry.
You applied for the job with a reason, already having a huge appreciation for him as an artist, adoring his work so far, especially Fine Line. Upon hearing about the opportunity to be part of his tour, you didn’t hesitate to send your application in and following three auditions, you got the phone call that they wanted you on board.
He swept you right off your feet the first time you met him, but you didn’t expect less from him. Everything you heard about him being the most wonderful person to every walk the planet were proven to be nothing but the truth. You hit it off so easily and become close through the process of rehearsals. His odd little jokes, that funny laugh of his and the way he always peeks over his shoulder to meet his eyes with yours made you fall for him faster than you’d have ever thought you could.
Just as fast as your feeling for Harry developed, tour caught up on you and before you could blink twice, you were living on the road, always dressing from your suitcase, waking up in a different city every other morning.
The foreign studio feels a little odd, but still somehow familiar as you walk in with your water and notebook under your arm. Random studio sessions with Harry became a regular not long after tour kicked off. Harry’s creative juices were overflowing and he was aching to record his creations, constantly renting random studios near the hotel you lot were staying currently and one night, when some of you all were hanging out in his suit, he asked if you’d be down helping him record vocals for a song he’s been working on.
“I want to hear it with your voice instead of mine,” he told you leaning against the wall, a glass of whatever Mitch mixed him in his hands.
“Getting bored of your own voice?” you teased him, bringing his dimples out with the smile that plastered across his lips.
“Could say that. Are you up for it?”
There was no way you would have said no. So the next morning you found yourself in a studio somewhere in Sacramento, singing the vocals to a song no one else has heard other than you and Harry.
The tour has now reached Denver, you can’t wait to be on the stage tonight, but before that, you are having another quick session with Harry in the studio.
When you walk in, his head perks up from his leather notebook he always keeps on himself, filled with his scribbled lyrics. A smile stretches across his lips when his green eyes fall on your frame.
“Hey! Hope it’s not too early for you,” he softly says standing up from the chair as you put your stuff down to the small table in the corner.
“No, managed to get a good night sleep still,” you smile at him, taking a quick look around, though this recording room is just like the others you’ve been in.
“I think I figured out that part we struggled with last time. Changed up the ending a bit, would you mind giving it another go?”
You nod looking down at his notes, seeing the changes he has made in the vocals.
“Changed anything else?” you ask as you watch him get ready for the recording.
“Yeah, rewrote a few lines, think they are fitting better now.”
“Have you recorded them yet?”
“Will do now,” he tells you shaking his head.
Soon enough you find yourself standing behind the mic, headset covering your ears as you are waiting for Harry to start recording and the music to play in your ears. Once he shows up his thumb you do the same and a moment later the song you’ve heard last time you two were working starts flowing from the headset and you stare down at the notes in front of you, waiting for the moment when you have to start singing.
It takes you a few runs to nail it down, but when you finally do, you can see the satisfied grin on Harry’s face and you think to yourself that there’s nothing you wouldn’t do to make him like this anytime.
“That was fantastic,” he beams once you join him at the screens where you see your voice appear as a pattern over a straight line. Harry does his usual magic before leaving it be. “Mind assisting recording my part?” he asks turning to you with an excited smile.
Nodding you let him tell you what to do and once he is all set behind the mic, you start the recording and the song. You listen to him in awe. There hasn’t been a moment when you didn’t feel the shiver running down your spine when he started singing. You are convinced a choir of angels is hidden in his throat, because it’s hard to believe he is just as human as everyone else.
He sings the whole song three times before he joins you again, listening back to what you have so far. The song is coming along pretty well and you can tell by the time he finishes it, it’s gonna be perfect. Everything he does is just pure perfection, whether he likes to admit it or not.
“You know how it would be absolutely perfect?” he asks you on your way back to the hotel. The two of you grabbed a coffee as well, so now you’re sipping on the hot drink, enjoying the somewhat sunny weather.
“Hm?”
“I think it would be best if a female voice sang the whole thing and the male was just the vocal.”
“Who do you think would fit best for it then?” you ask, immediately thinking of singers that could be perfect for the song. It wouldn’t be the first time Harry would sell a song to someone else, so you’re not surprised he is thinking about this kind of change.
“Y/N, I found the voice already,” he chuckles and you give him a puzzled look. “You. You are singing the song, I don’t need anyone else.”
“I’m not a solo singer,” you protest.
“There’s no such thing as solo or not solo. You’re a singer and a bloody good one. I want you to sing it.”
“But it would go to waste, because I would never actually perform it.”
“How are you so sure about that?” he smirks slyly at you, immediately making you nervous.
“Harry, I don’t sing solo,” you shake your head stubbornly, but he rolls his eyes at you.
“You could just try it. Let’s just record the song next time with you in the lead and then we can talk about the rest.”
“I’m fine recording, but I will never perform it,” you tell him, but his look makes you think he has other plans.
When tour reaches Dallas, the song gets a version with you singing solo and Harry doing the vocals in it. And though you had doubts about the switch, listening back to it you can tell how much it helped. It really is better with a female voice, though you are still convinced it shouldn’t be you.
“Are you sure you don’t want to sell it to someone? I’m fine with that,” you ask him before the show in Dallas. You’re sitting on the table in his dressing room while he is painting his nails, his tongue poking out in concentration.
“I told you, I like it with your voice. Why is that so hard to believe?”
“Because I’m not a—“
“Fuck’s sake if you dare to tell me one more time that you’re not a solo singer, I’m firing you, Y/N!” he snaps, giving you a hard look, but you just laugh at his temper.
“It’s the truth.”
“Have you ever tried to go solo?”
“Not for years,” you admit and watch him screw the nail polish closed, pushing it aside, his hands lying flat on the table as he is carefully waiting for them to dry.
“So then how do you know you are no good at it?”
“Because I hated it back then, so I most likely would hate it now as well,” you state matter-of-factly, but Harry doesn’t seem amused by your answer.
“So you think you haven’t changed a bit in years? I hope you know that’s absolute bollocks.”
“Why are you so keen on making me sing solo?” you sigh, giving him a tired look. It feels like the two of you have been running the same circles since forever. It’s not his first attempt to get you sing more than just the vocals, he once wanted to do a cover and needed a partner because it was a duet and begged you for weeks to sing with him, but you didn’t give in. You just couldn’t.
“Because I think that you are a talented singer and I want you to feel the adrenaline rush performing gives you.”
“I do get that rush every time I sing behind you. That’s enough for me.”
Harry shakes his head pressing his lips tight together.
“That’s not the same as being in the lead. It’s a whole different world.”
“Yeah, one that makes me shit my pants,” you chuckle and he can’t push a smile back.
“Maybe we should just work on it. Your anxiety. I think we could actually make you feel better if we tried.”
“I still don’t know where this obsession with me being solo comes for you.”
Harry stands up, takes one last look at his nails before he steps closer smiling down at you softly and you bite into your bottom lip, realizing how close he is standing to you. His fingers tap in your cheek gently, running them down to your chin as he tilts your head up a bit.
“Just accept it, Love,” he smiles softly before stepping away and carrying on with his routine.
That evening, you stand at the back with the other two vocalists, eyes glued to Harry’s figure at the front of the stage, you watch him pour his soul out to the audience, interact with them and reach that state of mind you have never been able to get into. You know what he told you about performing is true, yet you are still terrified to do it yourself. It’s too nerve wrecking to have everyone look at and listen to you, so many chances to mess it up and make a fool out of yourself.
But when Harry’s eyes meet yours and he shoots you a warm smile, something shifts in you. The urge to have this connection with not just the audience and the song, but with him takes over your whole body and you make up your mind to at least give it a try.
Harry is ecstatic when you tell him later that night that you changed your mind. You see that sparkle in his eyes and it was already worth for you, just seeing him react like that.
“Though I have a few suggestions to change the lyrics.”
“You do?” he asks, seemingly surprised, but mostly amused that you had the balls to come out with it.
“Yeah. Just some tiny details.”
“Why haven’t you told me about these before?”
“Because it was your song. But if you want me to sing it, it has to be mine as well.” Harry stares back at you with a smile that’s filled with pride and joy, making your heart flutter in your aching chest as you think about performing solo.
“Our song,” he softly says nodding his head.
Arriving to Houston the two of you are quick to book a studio and work on the song. Harry lets you make any changes you desire on the lyrics, even says you did justice to it and that you should have spoken up earlier about your ideas. And then you record it.
It’s not that you have to sing the whole song and not just the vocals this time. You are completely fine with Harry hearing you sing, it’s the thought of performing it in front of anyone that’s not him, that’s what makes you turn into a wreck.
You record Harry’s vocals and once it’s all put together, you are blown by the outcome. You wouldn’t have thought Harry’s voice as the vocal would compliment you in the lead, but it’s just absolutely perfect and even you can’t find anything wrong with it.
“Love, this is what Heaven sounds like, I’m telling you,” he smirks at you from the chair beside you, playing the song for the tenth time, not able to get enough of the final product.
“You are so cheesy,” you shake your head, but feel the blush heating up your cheeks. His eyes linger on you a little longer before he turns back to the screen.
When the song is over he finally stops is so silence comes over the studio. Harry turns back to face you, his green eyes basically burning a hole into your head.
“So, when are we going to perform it?”
“I really don’t think it’s a good idea,” you sigh looking down at your hands fumbling with your shirt.
“And I do think it is. So I’m not stopping until you at least try it.”
Harry Styles gets what he wants. Always. And this time, no matter how hard you try to resist him, you just can’t deny this from him. Though it takes him time to talk you up, in Washington he finally gets you to give it a try in an empty stadium.
Most of the crew is out, since the building has been finished about half an hour before, so everything is perfectly set for tonight’s show when you walk out to the stage, following Harry in his heels. He asked the piano to be brought to the front along with a mic on it and another one on a stand next to it. The two of you quietly put on your earpieces, doing everything as if it was a usual occasion before a concert, only that this time the roles will be entirely switched.
“It’s fine, alright? No one is around,” he tells you when he sees how nervous you are to sing the song for the first time outside a studio.
“There are some backstage,” you mumble under your breath, not expecting him to do anything about it.
But he does. You watch him walk backstage, completely dumbfounded about what he is doing. He disappears from your sight and a few moments later you hear him shouting at the back.
“No one comes to the stage until I say so! Yea? Thanks!” he orders and then walks back as if he didn’t just boss around the whole crew.
“They will think you’re some kind of crazy celebrity,” you chuckle when he returns, a small smirk playing on his pink lips.
“Don’t care, Darling. Now sing you heart out for me.”
Harry sits on the piano bench, his fingers getting settled on the keys before he looks up to meet your anxious eyes.
“It’s alright. Just you and me, yea?”
Nodding you gulp hard and jump a little when he starts playing the melody the two of you have been working on for so long. You hear all the notes and you know you have to start singing, but you miss the opening. Harry stops and looks at you, as you move your eyes down to the ground, ashamed you messed up immediately.
“S-Sorry, I just—“
“How can I help?” he asks right away, not even caring about the fact that you messed up, focused on figuring out a way that would help you.
“I don’t know. I really don’t,” you sigh, feeling your nerves getting worse with each passing moment.
“Come sit next to me,” he then tells you motioning for you to join him on the bench.
“What?”
“Take your mic and sit next to me,” he repeats, scooting over to make you space. Hesitantly, you pull the mic out of the stand and walking over you sit next to him. “Now you are not in the center. Just listen to the music, watch my hands on the keys, okay?”
You nod, running your tongue over your dry lips as you hold the mic to your mouth before Harry starts playing again.
After the first few notes you close your eyes and when it’s time for you to start singing, Harry leans a little against you, giving you a kind of push to just do it. And it works.
It feels a little as if it’s not even you who starts singing, but it is. Your voice fills the empty arena along with the piano’s melody and keeping your eyes closed a little longer you let your mind settle. When the first verse ends you open them and watch his hands work on the keys, right as he starts singing the vocals, leaning a little forward so his voice reaches his mic.
It’s different. It’s electric and freeing, hear your voice through the massive speakers, to be in the lead and have Harry be just the support in the song. But it feels so right, better than anything you’ve ever felt.
Line after line, you hit all the notes and by the end of the song you are able to strip all your fears down and give yourself over to the music completely. As you sing the last few notes you feel Harry’s eyes on you and turning to face him, you are met with his warm, pride-filled smile and bright eyes, glued to you while his fingers press down the last notes.
The music dies down, the voice of the piano vibrates in the air a little longer until it completely disappears and the silence returns into the stadium.
“Love,” Harry quietly calls out for you and you turn completely towards him. “That was absolutely perfect.”
“You think so?” you ask, voice barely more than just a whisper, your eyes never leaving his gaze.
“I know so,” he huffs, smile widening. He brings an arm around your shoulders and pulls you into a hug, pressing a lingering kiss to your forehead as you let out a breath you’ve been holding in for way too long.
He doesn’t try to make you perform that evening, knowing well it was enough for one day, but he does make you sing it with him in each city in the upcoming weeks. Before every concert, he empties out the area around the stage and the two of you sit down at the piano, singing your song until you feel comfortable enough to stand next to the instrument instead of sitting next to him.
The tour reaches New York and Madison Square Garden is getting ready to host Harry Styles for two evenings. The place is massive and you find yourself sitting at the edge of the stage when Harry emerges from backstage.
“Looks wild, right?” he asks sitting next to you, his thigh brushing against yours as he gets seated.
“Yeah. Pretty amazing.”
“This place has the most magical vibe.” “Yeah?” Turning to him you watch him take the arena in, his eyes glistening at the sight in front of him. You know it’s not his first time performing here, but it’s nice to see the excitement in his eyes regardless.
That feeling returns to your chest, the one you felt when Harry told you he wanted you to sing the song. The urge to be part of this amazing something that’s so much bigger than you.
“H?”
“Yea?” he turns to you smiling.
“Can I… Do you think we could sing our song tonight?”
You watch the pure surprise and excitement wash over his face, his smile stretching across his face as he stares back at you in awe.
“You want to sing it?”
Shyly, you nod your head and in a heartbeat his arms lock around you, pulling you into the tightest hug. The two of you almost fall off the stage, laughing together at his dramatic reaction.
“Of course we can sing it, Love. Would be an honor!”
Harry is quick to let the band know about the addition for tonight’s set and though everyone seems surprised, they are all supportive about your solo. As the time goes and the concert gets closer, you can feel the nerves building up and soon enough, you start to doubt your choice to sing the song tonight.
Right before it’s time to go on stage Harry takes your hand and pulls you aside, taking your face in his hands gently, making you look into his eyes.
“I know you are doubting yourself, but just know that I’m very proud of you, even if you decide to not sing the last minute.”
“I could do that?” you whisper, your hands finding his sides and you let them rest on him, a way to ground yourself in the windwhirl of your thoughts.
“Of course. I wouldn’t want to make you do something you don’t really want. Though I know you will be amazing if you choose to sing.”
Nodding you let a weak smile appear on your lips and you notice as his eyes flicker down to them before he moves his gaze up to your eyes. He then pulls you into a proper hug before walking back to the rest of the band and vocalists.
Everything goes as usual and once again, you can’t take your eyes off Harry on the stage. Just watching him perform fills you up with life, enough to keep you from running away. About halfway into the set, as the crowd is still cheering after the previous song, Harry jogs over to you.
“You ready?” he asks over the noise and before you could think about it, you nod your head.
Two guys from the crew pushes the piano further to the front and they help to set everything up as you awkwardly stand at the side. Once your mic is in the stand you walk over there, heart hammering in your chest, hands shaking like crazy.
“I have a special song for you tonight,” Harry announces into the microphone as he makes his way over to the piano. “Please welcome the lovely Y/N here, who is gonna enchant you with a song we’ve been working on lately.”
The crowd screams and you allow yourself to look around with a weak smile. So many people, you think to yourself, everyone watching you.
“It’s called Homesick, and it means so much to us, so we hope you’ll like it Justas much as we do,” Harry adds before settling on the bench and his eyes find yours. “I’m proud of you,” you see him say, only able to read his lips since the crowd is screaming so loud. “Ready?” he asks and you nod, taking a shaky breath.
He sends you a warm comforting smile before glancing down at the keys and then he starts playing. 
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Just like the first time, you close your eyes, forcing yourself to focus on the melody and nothing else. The lump in your throat is quite uncomfortable, but you open your eyes and see that Harry is looking straight at you, nodding in encouragement, as his fingers push down the keys to the notes right before you have to start.
“Here, where the sky’s falling, I’m covered in blue, I’m running and I’m crawling, fighting for you…”
Harry smiles wide when your voice flows through the speakers, filling the whole place, making everyone go quiet in a heartbeat as the song carries on. You feel your chest slowly deflating, the nerves cooling down with each sung note.
“You give me a reason, something to believe in, I know, I know, I know. You give me a meaning, something I can breathe in, I know, I know, I know…”
The chorus comes out perfect, your voice melting together with the piano and you finally feel your muscles relax as you slowly let go of every toxic thought that’s been tainting your mind. Harry leans closer to his microphone and his voice gently joins yours in the next verse.
“There’s a crack in my window, a bird in my room, angels all over that watch over you…”
Chills run down your spine hearing his voice, your eyes never leaving his gaze that’s fixated on your standing figure. You get lost in him and the song, something that came from the both of you, a piece of you and him. Standing there, singing this piece makes you feel closer to him than ever and you desperately want this feeling to last forever, hoping the song never ends though you know it’s gonna happen.
“When I’m walking on water all my dreams have come true. Still nothing means nothing without you…”
Homesick is exactly the feeling that bubbles inside you when you think of Harry. Because there’s this man you love so much, who is a home away from home to you, yet you still feel like you can’t be home entirely. Not in the way you’d want to. But standing on the stage in the spotlight, singing together with him as thousands of people are watching the two of you, yet you still manage to forget about them, for a moment, you feel like you finally arrived home. You are there, with him.
“Tell my heart to lie, but I know deep inside it’s true. That I wish I was there with you. That I wish I was there with you, oh I wish I was there with you.”
He plays the end of the song without tearing his eyes away from you, and there’s just a heartbeat of silence before the crowd starts screaming deafeningly, but that short moment… is yours and his.
Tugging your hair behind your ears with your shaky hands, your eardrums on the verge of breaking as you let out a laugh that was kind of a sob as well, relief washing over your body. Harry is quick to jump to his feet and rushing over he envelopes you in a tight hug.
“I’m so so so proud of you, Love. You were everything!” he mumbles, arms holding you so tight you almost lose your breath, but you want him this close, or even closer. You need to feel him, because it doesn’t feel real. His hold brings you a sense of existence only he can give you.
“Thank you, Harry,” you breathe out when he pulls back to look into your eyes, the screaming hasn’t died down even a tad little.
“No, thank you, Darling. You shined like the star that you are,” he grins, playing a sloppy kiss to your cheek before his arms fall off you.
You’d die to stay in this moment a little longer, but the show must go on. The crew pushes the piano back and soon enough, the next song starts. You stay in your spot for the rest, but you keep catching Harry smiling in your way, always making you blush.
The end of a concert is always a little hectic, everyone is all over the place. Still coming off the high you just experienced, you head to the dressing room you share with the other vocalists. They are going on and on about how amazing Homesick was, and you somehow still can’t believe tonight happened. Packing your stuff you barely notice that the door flies open, but you see Harry appear from the corner of your eye.
“Ladies, would you please give me a moment with Y/N?” he asks and the girls are quick to leave the two of you alone. You stand there, kind of dumbfounded, not sure why he is acting so dramatic. Once the door closes and it’s just you and him, he stares at you, chest heaving, his hair wet from his sweat, but he still looks breathtaking.
“Harry—“
“I’m gonna kiss you now,” he cuts you off, your breath gets caught in your throat as you stare back at him, completely frozen. Opposite to what he just said, he remains standing in the same spot and you’re not sure what’s happening. “Can I? Please say yes, I can’t hold myself back for any longer,” he then adds.
“Yes,” you breathe out without even thinking about it. In a heartbeat, Harry crosses the room, chest smashing against yours as he wraps his arms around you, lips crashing onto yours in a kiss that almost makes you moan into his mouth.
It’s all a hot mess, teeth clashing, hands all over each other before his palms run down to the back of your thighs, urging you to jump. When you do, you wrap your legs around his waist and let him walk over to the table nearby, so he can place you on top, standing between your thighs as he keeps kissing you hungrily, his tongue melting together with yours in this sweet chaos. It keeps going on and on, neither of you wanting to let go of the other, but you are eventually forced to stop, coming short of air. Panting wildly, lips swollen from his kisses, you look at him to meet his gaze.
“You have no idea how hard it was to stop myself from kissing you on stage.”
“What?” you breathe out.
“Y/N, I’m fucking crazy about you and seeing you come over your stage fright, sing that song… our song, fuck, that did some unbelievable things to me. Please tell me you felt the same thing!” He is begging, not just with his words, but with his eyes as well and it crushes your soul entirely.
“I did. Harry, I always do when I’m with you.”
“Fucking Hell,” he breathes out before kissing you again. “You are… everything, Love,” he mumbles against your lips and you can’t push down the smile stretching across your face, hearing him say the same words he said right after the song.
“You’ve told me that,” you tease him, his gaze meeting yours as he flashes you his famous half-smirk, heart fluttering at the sight of him.
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captnjacksparrow · 3 years
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if you had to rank your fav naruto characters how would it go? love your blog btw!!
Hmmm... Complicated ask, anon.😂
[My personal life would be splashed here and there. Please bear with me]
Before 5 months, if you asked me about Naruto, my response would be ‘What the fuck is that?’. I absolutely had no idea such a treasure existed. For me, it started out like a blockbuster movie for the sheer variety of fights and the resulting emotions it brought within me. 
However, there was a point I stopped and thought, ‘Wait a fucking second. This resembles my family dynamics. This person is speaking the exact same lines I spoke to my parents few years ago. This person’s situation resembles mine. Did this creator a time traveler?’. Naruto is the only piece of media that gave me such feel. Am not even exaggerating, believe me. 
I really liked so many characters very much but am going to try my best to list just 10. 
The only characters I hate in this series are Danzo, Sakura and Hinata in no particular order. Meaning, I absolutely cannot see any positives in them. They are crassy, cringey and completely detestable.
FAVOURITE NARUTO CHARACTERS
10. Killer Bee
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HaHaHa :-) Just seeing this character makes me smile and light-hearted.
It’s a pity that he is the only character who don’t belong to Konoha in my Top 10 rankings who was developed well apart from Gaara.
I loved him from Frame 1 onwards and I sincerely wished Team Taka should be packed up with their ass beaten up mercilessly. And that’s what happened.
Despite being a Jinchurikki, he never bothered to mind his surroundings and filled his heart with love from his over protective Brother alone was nice to watch.
He makes a great Tag Partner with Naruto next to Sasuke. No doubt.
The way Killer Bee treated Team Taka like some annoying flies and his cool and don’t care attitude was top notch. It’s not just with Sasuke, Bee treated Naruto with the same IDGAF attitude at first.
Best Moments:
Lariat punch to Sasuke (TBH, Sasuke deserved it. LOL)
Blasted off every member of Team Taka like a doll
His entire conversation and fight sequence with Kisame (Their banters and exchanges are way too hilarious)
His dynamics with his Elder Brother (God!!!! Whenever Raikage gives him an Iron Claw.... What a hilarious duo!!!!)
9. Hatake Kakashi
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Kakashi was my most favourite character when I started the series for simply being ultra-cool with the way he conducted the Bell-Test and taught a valuable lesson for those bratty kids in Team 7 called ‘Team Work’. 
Best Moments:
Kakashi vs Obito Hand-to-Hand Combat (the best in the series)
Kakashi in the Gaara retrieval arc (His fight with Itachi & Deidara gave a good start to the shippuden series. His Mangekyou reveal was surprising).
Kakashi & Guy teaming up with Naruto to reveal Obito in a twisty and tragic way. (Kakashi couldn’t handle the truth at all and neither did I)
Kakashi vs Zabuza (That’s when I realized that the series was getting real serious)
8. Jiraiya
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Jiraiya was my next favourite to Kakashi during my Part 1 days. His open perversion and his entire dynamics with Naruto was one of the best things during the Chunin Exams arc. Taught Naruto about Chakra Control and about the way of a shinobi by just enduring. Naruto follows this even today.
Best Moments: 
Kuchiyose No Jutsu training (Man, I never expected him to push Naruto off the cliff)
Rasengan Training (One of the best arcs in part 1 and it was soo satisfying to see Naruto punching his first Rasengan on Kabuto, He also acted like a quasi parent to Naruto... heartwarming)
Jiraiya Vs Six paths of Pain ( 6 vs 1 was always doomed but still he had the guts of a shinobi and plunged ahead)
7. Uchiha Madara
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Geez. What is there to not like him?? 
Everything he did was absolutely wrong ever since he broke up with Hashirama in a romantic way much similar to how couples break up in my country.
I am an Uchiha. You are a Senju. I wish it had been different.
This roughly translates to how 75% of lovers break up and marry someone else from their own clan in my state. (Duh!!!)
I am from XXX clan, you are from XXX clan. So we can’t love each other and my parents won’t accept this relationship. So let’s break up.
Alright, my first shipping couple in this series is HashiMada for this exact reason. (I started shipping SNS only after episode 478). 
Just like Hashirama, Madara had an extensive build up right from episode 1 where Kurama compares Sasuke with Madara. And flashbacks from Itachi and Tobi spiked my curiosity and I wanted to see his face so badly ever since.
But the moment he landed gracefully like a diva in episode 321.... Woaahhhh!!!! He literally danced in the battlefield and ate up 100′s of guys with just a fucking Sharingan. 
Best Moments:
Going Shirtless before 1000′s of people with Hashirama’s face, no less (Well, I literally went heart-eyed for 5 minutes. Sorry Sasuke, your ancester was way much sexier than you in the Orochimaru hideout and beats you by a million points).
Screaming Hashirama’s name like a cockatoo for 300 times even till the very end (Sorry Naruto, your obsession towards Sasuke for about 6 arcs is pale in comparison to Madara’s obsession which was established in just 6 or 7 episodes.)
I have 25 clones now. Do you want me to put Susanoo or not? You can’t answer. The answer is yes. (Man, his I don’t give a fuck attitude is just an alien level thing)
Openly admitting Only Hashirama Can Beat Me (Say what you will about Sasuke, Madara has no qualms about accepting his inferiority in terms of power. An absolute Straight Forward diva-queen)
Awakening Sharingan for breaking up with his ‘friend’ rather than for his 3 dead brothers. (Geez, Poor Soul. He is the forefather of a Romantic Uchiha. That romantic blood still flows in Sasuke)
6. Senju Hashirama
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Man, I would have placed him somewhere in top 5 if only he was introduced early or had more scenes. I started watching Naruto only because of this very name. There is a local podcaster in my state who goes under the alias of Senju Hashirama and in his podcasts, he hinted about this character and how he was inspired by his ideals. I just googled and saw that this character belonged to Naruto series and I considered watching it. Here I am, making analysis on that very series.
There was this excellent build up for him right when we got introduced to Captain Yamato. He was constantly referred in flashbacks from Itachi and Tobi especially.
But the moment he was reanimated again..... Geez..... It was an hilarious ride all throughout. Out of all the flashbacks we got from this series, Founders Era flashback was my absolute favourite.
From where I come from, we are still under the stupid influence of Clan infrastructure and are not growing up in many aspects like people in western countries do. For me, I hope, one day, someone like Senju Hashirama appears in our state and change our lives for better by uniting all clans as one and treats everyone equally without the shitty favouritism for their own children, friends, parents, siblings.
That’s why this dialogue struck a thunder in my heart
“Be they a friend.... Be they a sibling.... Be it even my own child. I will not forgive anyone who threatens the village.”
Because the clan leaders in our place are absolutely selfish, trash bastards who serves their own needs with no regards for other people from other clans. For a person like me, Hashirama is not just a fictional hero, he is someone who many aspires to become. No wonder that podcaster chose this name as his alias.
He rightfully deserved the title ‘God of Shinobi’. And no one can surpass him, not even Naruto.
Best Moments:
Wood Style vs Eternal Mangekyou sharingan + Kurama powered Madara (He just beats Madara’s ass by a wide margin. This shows he was a whole fucking different level than Naruto + Sasuke combined. In terms of strength, nobody surpassed him YET. Sorry Naruto and Sasuke, you guys are no match even now with your Rinnegan and Kurama lost forever).
His entire banters with Madara (ROFLLLL. Without him, it would have been just another lifeless arc.)
5. Senju Tobirama
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Hmmm, let me tell you something about him.
First off, he is not a racist or fascist as many hardcore Sasuke fanatics claims. He is one of the best hokages according to me. He is abso-fucking-lutely practical, rational, logical and holds no grudge. And Sasuke resembles Tobirama with all these characteristics as compared to soft and naive Naruto. If only he had more screen time, he would be easily in my top 3. 
Just because he didn’t lick the boots of Uchiha (many people’s favorite clan or may I say the only clan that was given any shit about in this series), it doesn’t make him a racist or fascist.
No, he never persecuted the Uchihas. Danzo, the crass bastard, driven off the Uchihas only after the Kyuubi incident. It was explicitly mentioned in the databook and was clearly explained in the series. 
He literally gave the highest position in the village for the entire clan. That is, a military power inside a military village. ‘Shinobi who can cause crimes can only be stopped by shinobi who are even better’. In my state, if a powerful clan decided to persecute another clan, they simply start by cutting off basic amenities like Water and Electricity. Compared to what I’ve seen, Tobirama did nothing but given the Uchihas, the highest position in their village. 
Orochimaru only said giving such a power made them conceited (arrogant). Tobirama had a trusted subordinate called Kagami, an Uchiha in his team. He suggested Kabuto to help Sasuke and even teleported him on his request. He even spited Madara for killing Sasuke, an Uchiha. He openly claimed Uchiha clan exceeds Senju in terms of Love. He openly appreciated Itachi and Kagami as someone who sees beyond their clan. In what world, would a racist or fascist do all this for a clan he hates??? 
Yes, he was cautious of Sasuke at first because he saw him with Orochimaru and even went full-on battle mode because of Sasuke’s carefree threat to destroy the village. But once he decided to go to the battlefield to fight Madara, he simply forgot everything that happened before and started to work with him as a comrade, and even helped him twice. In which world, a racist or fascist behave this way?
Believe me, a person like me who was grown with these clan politics surely can say who is a fascist. He was not. He was just cautious of them because of their ability to attain superpowers with just emotions alone. Let me ask you all this, ‘Would you be okay with people getting crazy powers whenever they are depressed?’. Being cautious is not racism. It really disrespects people who faced real oppression under fascism.
What Madara and Danzo did was a classical example of fascism. 
And No, Izuna didn’t die only because of Tobirama. He died because Madara was too arrogant to instigate war with Senju clan. And this was way before forming Konoha. If Tobirama killed Izuna after the alliance between Uchiha and Senju, I would agree that he was a racist. Izuna lost his life just like any other Uchiha and Senju soldiers in that battlefield. 
Just because he shitted your beloved ‘Sasuke-Kun’ doesn’t mean he is a racist too. Tobirama saw Sasuke along with that scoundrel Orochimaru who once used this very two hokages to destroy the very village they strived hard to create and protect. What will you do, if you were in his place?? Please don’t lie and say ‘I wouldn’t be judgemental’. 
And Imagine you are Tobirama, Sasuke is threatening to commit genocide against the entire village who had no idea about this coup detat instead of going against those old hags. Will you sit quiet as a Hokage?? 
He was the first person to suggest his brother, Itama, that Revenge against Uchihas are futile. All we need is an agreement to make truce. That gave the idea for Hashirama to pursue his dream. And Tobirama was happy to follow that dream and very supportive. 
It’s because of all these reasons I placed him above Senju Hashirama.
Best Moments:
Amazing power display against Sasuke & Co with just an index finger (It was a pleasure to see everyone’s face trembling with mild sweat including Sasuke).
Acted as a decoy to save his young subordinates. (The way he sacrificed his life saying young wills of fire must be protected is just Woow!! I wish his subordinates listened to his words and passed the mantle to the younger ones rather than playing game at such an old age and screwed up many lives. Pfft!!!)
Any time he says ‘Shut Up’ to Hashirama (ROFL)
His absolute ‘I don’t give a fuck’ attitude to Naruto, Sasuke, Hashirama, Minato and Madara (He trolled them all mercilessly and I love it)
4. Senju Tsunade
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It hurts me to say that Tsunade is the only female character in my list because every other female characters were written in a much more piss poorly way. Only Konan came close to Tsunade but her role was very short. 
Despite her character’s purpose revolved around another male character (Dan) and a blatant objectification of her breasts, I liked everything about her other than those mentioned above. 
She is the Second Best Hokage who took Konoha right after the destruction made by Orochimaru, excellently handled the aftermath by making friendly relations with Suna (Sand village), provided her best medical support to Konoha in the Pain Arc and successfully handled the fourth Shinobi world war. 
She is such a badass who developed her own original jutsu called Byakugou no Jutsu, which can heal herself. 
She is just way too amazing and it’s a pity that we got very less scenes in Shippuden.
Best Moments:
Took 25+ stabs from Madara’s Susanoo like a piece of cake (Man, I simply couldn’t describe that scene. All the other Kages were shocked and even Madara too)
Lifted her advisors like a cabbage sack (Those fucking old hags deserved it. Those shits should’ve died)
Her index finger flick assault on Naruto (Aww, Naruto was definitely bratty in his first meeting and Tsunade didn’t hold back at all)
Played Orochimaru like a basketball (In that same arc, she fought Orochimaru mercilessly like a devil left and right. Someone who claimed to have surpassed Tsunade never even dared to fight Orochimaru’s student and crying for his attention after just receiving one stab from Madara. Just saying)
3. Uzumaki Naruto
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Naruto is the titular character and your emotions evolve along with him. He surely deserves a spot in Top 3. The only reason I didn’t place Naruto even more higher is because he didn’t experience something very important which many characters in this list faced. That is, Losing a loved one before his eyes. Every villain in this series became what they are because they lost someone important before their eyes like Nagato, Obito. (Nope, I don’t count Neji as his loved one). I think this tests the mettle of any character and Naruto failed to experience this. The only person he ever lost was Jiraiya and that too from off-screen. That’s why I felt his journey to his dreams seemed little easier compared to the rest of the characters.
His best block of episodes will always be the part 1 Episode 1, 2, 3. Episode 1 is the character defining episode for Naruto and what he learned there will be applied everywhere till the very end of the series. He learned 3 things
Forgiveness, Empathy and Acceptance
Talk-No-Jutsu
Kage Bunshin no Jutsu
From then on, this boy wins many friends to his side, not only from Konoha but from other villages too and even made them to acknowledge his strength only through his sheer hard work. 
However, there is this person, whose acknowledgement he wants the most.  That person is his most important bond along with Iruka Sensei. He is none other than Sasuke. One day, Sasuke left him alone for some unavoidable reason at the end of part 1 which left a huge scar in him and he vows to bring him back to the place where he belongs. That becomes his ultimate goal rather than becoming an Hokage.
The way he goes to any extent to protect the people he cares about is just simply entertaining to watch.
Every time he makes an heroic entry to save the day was never boring, not once. 
Best Moments:
Sobbing from his heart after hearing Iruka Sensei acknowledging him (It just makes me feel heavy for no reason. The anime team did an awesome job to capture his emotions convincingly)
Awakening Kyuubi Mode for the first time after seeing Sasuke die in his arms (Man, out of all the collective hatred he got from the villagers, this moment affected him a lot speaks volumes)
Punching Neji from the underground to win the Chunin exams (God, I honestly believed Naruto lost but he just surprised us heavily from nowhere. And that failure speech was just pure bliss to watch even today)
Pain Vs Naruto (One of the best arc for Naruto. Because unlike other arcs, where Naruto fought with a team, this arc he was all alone fighting a person with Rinnegan. Be it the exuberant landing from the frogs with a dramatic kabuki music, creating multi-step attacks, coming up with novel solution in that difficult situation, finally ending the conflict without killing the enemy, becoming an hero. Superb journey. The only thing I didn’t like in that arc is some shitty selfish proposal. PUKE!!)
Bearing the burdens of his most important person and die along with him (This boy always shouts he will never die until he becomes an Hokage. But for Sasuke, he was ready to die along with him in order to not leave him alone proves how much he loves him. This shows his emotional maturity rather than shouting at Sasuke like he always did before which never reached his ears. This time it did)
Final Good Bye to Minato (Honestly, I was bawling just like Naruto in that scene no matter how many times I watch it. It started out slow but as he speaks more and more, he simply couldn’t hold back and wept a sea of tears 😭😭😭)
2. Uchiha Sasuke
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One of the well written characters in this series, with all the flaws and positive stuffs which makes him more of an Anti-Hero. He always subverts my preformed opinions and never ceased to surprise me.
Despite being aloof and cold, his warmer side will always be exposed towards Naruto. This is evident by many things he had done for Naruto which he don’t have to or no reason to. Starting right from roasting Sakura, offering lunch, asking for tips, enquiring about breakfast, protecting him many times and dying for Naruto. 
Why I placed him above Naruto is because of his unavoidable decision to tread in a complicated dark path primarily due to the trauma he carried and was stirred up again by collective factors such as Orochimaru’s cursed seal, Itachi’s arrival and Naruto’s growth. Compared to Sasuke, Naruto had an easier path because he never saw anyone die before his eyes and hence he don’t carry any trauma which can divert his path.
Even after watching his entire clan and family members murdered before his eyes at an age 8, he managed to pull himself and never snapped out like many other good characters does. But the moment when he found out that Itachi was good all along, he simply couldn’t tolerate the truth and gave himself to Vengeance. Because, he loved his brother more than he hated him all these years. This shows he loved his brother more than his parents. His resolve to destroy Konoha was perfectly understandable. But is it good? Nope. He can kill Danzo and those old hags but killing other people was never justifiable.
But still, his resolve to have his vengeance was diverted by Naruto and weakened by Itachi, at some point. So, he decided to know the truth and when he heard it, he understood the Hokages also sacrificed many precious things to protect this village just like his Brother Itachi. He understood the mistakes of his clan and decided to protect the village which he swore to destroy. [Many Sasuke fanatics think that he succumbed to the Government and Kishi wrote Sasuke to bootlick them. Their idea was to tackle genocide with another genocide. What a stupid idea!!!!]
And No, I don’t consider him trying to kill Sakura, Karin and Kakashi as his bad moments (though I feel bad for Karin). For the simple reason being, he became a monster by losing himself in the darkness who lost the rationality to differentiate friends from foes. Much similar to how Naruto lost himself to Kyuubi’s hatred against Orochimaru and in Pain Arc. It’s so hypocritical to ignore Naruto and accuse Sasuke here. Plus, Sakura had no business to be there otherwise Sasuke would not have tried to kill her. 
But does it mean Sasuke did nothing wrong???
Nope.
He definitely shouldn’t have joined Akatsuki and hunted Killer Bee like an animal. Because, he knew that Tobi was the one who helped Itachi massacre the clan. When fighting Itachi he specifically vowed to kill Madara (Tobi). On top of that, Itachi passed on Amaterasu in his eyes specifically to stay away from Tobi. Why did he ally with him? Plus, Sasuke was one of the few characters who was exposed to the name ‘Akatsuki’ in part 1 itself. He clearly knew that this organization targets Naruto, his closest bond. Why did he join there? This is where the stupid part of Sasuke came out. I was grunting... ‘Oii Where did that clever Sasuke, who faced 1000 soldiers without killing any of them, went??’. 
And his plan for Revolution???? I thought it would be reasonable. But his vision was eerily similar to Danzo’s vision. Grrr..... Danzo also wanted to create his ideal village by destroying the current Hokage. He wanted to unite the Five Village and put himself on top of everyone as evident from the Kage Summit arc. 
I appreciate him that he finally adopted the Will of Fire, by wanting to protect the village at all costs just like Itachi and Hashirama did. But his methods are not very democratic. Plus, he wanted to do it alone. I was screaming at him... ‘Grrr, Sasuke, did you listen to Itachi at all???. He failed because he did everything alone. Why can’t you understand????’ This is also another instance, Sasuke’s stupidity glanced out.
I am happy Naruto knocked some sense into him by telling him not to do it alone but together.
Many fanatics also ask, ‘What did Sasuke do wrong to atone for his sins at the end?’.
I was like ‘Reallly????’
He joined Akatsuki, an organization which terrorized all the 5 villages and he hunted someone like an international criminal.
He spoiled the Kage Summit and attacked Raikage who lost his arm because of him. I know what happened over there is not Sasuke’s fault. But these are the kages who was loved by many people in their own villages. How can the world forget it and simply let him go?
It’s exactly because of all those lovely stuffs he did in Part 1 and all these mistakes he did in Part 2 but willing to correct his mistakes by sharing the burdens of his other half in the end made him more interesting, complicated and exciting and that’s why I love this character.
I also have a personal bias to love this character sooo much because of the character on top of my list.
Best Moments:
Defending Naruto before Sakura (Awww!!! Such a good boy he was. Eventhough I thought he was a typical arrogant K-Drama hero, he just subverted my opinion in that one scene. I always have a thing for people who stands up for someone even though they don’t have to. This is where I started to like Sasuke)
My body moved on its own. (Is there anything that trumps this scene in terms of emotions and love in this series?. This moment is where I understood the depth of Sasuke’s emotions towards Naruto).
What is a Clan? What is a Village? What is a Shinobi? (I was really hoping for Sasuke to question himself something similar to this. Because he was so self-absorbed in his hatred and failed to look outside him ever since he left the village. It was so gratifying that he did that)
Killing Orochimaru (I always thought Sasuke will kill him only after he tries to take over the body. Never imagined that he will strike the snake first)
Killing Danzo (Man, what an amazing battle!!!. It was so gratifying to see such a crass bastard die many times over and over).
His dramatic confession through his monologue (After the mystery of Who is this Tobi, Sasuke’s obsession towards Naruto remained a mystery for me. Why did he listen to Naruto under the bridge? Why did he protected Naruto in the War? I got the answer only after this confession. It was so heartwarming to see this mellow side of Sasuke)
1. Uchiha Itachi
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I could write pages about him. The foremost reason I like Itachi and earns the top spot in my rankings is because he shockingly resembled me in many ways. As I already said, I come from a place where clan politics plays a major role and when I see Sasuke’s flashback in part 1, I was simply dumbstruck by such a detailed similarities.
Elder child of the family - ✅
Have an adorable younger sister who loves me more than my parents - ✅
Same age gap (5 years) with my sister as Itachi and Sasuke - ✅
Parents paying total attention on me while ignoring my sister completely - ✅
Parents constantly comparing my achievements with my sister - ✅
A sister who bear hugged me every time I entered the home after returning from my school - ✅
Despite my mom being a teacher, my sister always prefers me to teach her stuffs as she considers me to be way too better than my mom -  ✅
Love my sister more than my parents - ✅
Clan-Obsessed parents - ✅
Used me as a tool for the benefit of the clan - ✅
Sending another person from my clan to spy on me - ✅
Strained relationship with my parents - ✅
Disgusted with my clan - ✅
Most importantly, this dialogue from part 1 episode 129,
Clan? Clan?
Obsessed with the organization, Obsessed with the clan, Obsessed with the name, that’s merely the detestable action that restrict yourself.
I have given up all hope in this worthless clan
Because, people obsess themselves to their clan, a thing so petty, they lose sight of the things that are truly important.
A real change cannot occur under restraints and controls
I confronted my parents with the exact same dialogue (almost 98% similar) in my own native language some years ago. 
I didn’t even know the existence of Naruto series at that time. I was simply shell-shocked by all these similarities with this character. 
And Yes, The moment I heard these dialogues, I knew Itachi, was a good guy, who had a very strong reason for his actions and I instantly knew Sasuke’s revenge will not bear him any happiness. 
It is exactly because of all these striking similarities of myself with Itachi, and my lil’l sister with Sasuke, my family dynamics with the Uchiha family.... I could understand the magnitude of Sasuke’s love towards Itachi. 
And precisely because of that, I could understand Sasuke’s love towards Naruto is not fucking ‘brotherly’ one but something that leans towards Attraction. 
No wonder, Itachi left Sasuke in Naruto’s care. 
Anyways to speak objectively, 
Itachi is an extremely self-sacrificial person whose life is full of pain and miseries but never blames it on the world unlike other Uchiha members like Madara, Obito and Sasuke to an extent.
He did things considering the bigger picture which never benefitted himself in anyway and was willing to go to any extent even at the expense of his own family and his brother’s happiness. That is, Uchiha Clan Massacre and Joining Akatsuki. None of this benefitted him in anyways but he did it anyway, for the village of Konoha. 
His ideals are shockingly similar to Hashirama, Which Sasuke pointed this out and Hashirama acknowledged that Itachi was a better shinobi than he was. ❤️❤️❤️
Now, does this means I support Uchiha clan massacre?
No way. Even Itachi didn’t.
This massacre happened because of the huge clusterfuck from Hiruzen’s incompetence, Danzo’s paranoid arrogance, Uchiha clan’s devious plan to over throw the government by force rather than approaching it in a peaceful way, say, a peace talk or a protest. 
All these people acted on their own self-interest. Itachi and Shisui caught in their whirlpool, bear their burdens and paid for it with their life. Sasuke suffered for it.
But, it’s not the only reason I love this character. It’s because, the moment he decided to massacre everyone, he marked his own death by the hands of his beloved brother. I love people who owns up their mistakes and face the consequences rather than making excuses (even though it’s not entirely his mistake).
Itachi is also the only character in this series who realized his failures on his own without anyone’s interference or Naruto’s Talk-No-Jutsu. 
And he apologized for everything he did to Sasuke.
Again, some hardcore Sasuke fanatics criticize/hate him for torturing their poor ‘Sasuke-Kun’ with his Tsukuyomi. I was like ‘Hmmm...What?’. 
First off, Itachi apologized to Sasuke for not thinking out from his point of view and also for not telling him the truth earlier.
Second off, Sasuke never even blamed Itachi for anything (even he didn’t hold him for killing their parents). If Sasuke himself, forgiven Itachi... Why are his fans being so rabid?
Third off, for all of his supposed ‘crimes’, he paid for it by dying as a disgraceful Madman rather than a Hero who really saved the village. He is someone who should be celebrated like Naruto but instead died proudly as a Traitor of Konoha.
All in all, One of the wonderfully written character I have ever seen in the media. 
Best Moments:
Itachi vs Sasuke (That battle was a pure brilliance and highly emotional especially after knowing the truth. When Sasuke released his Kirin, Itachi showed off his ultimate armour Susanoo like a badass. Seeing Susanoo for the first time gave me chills. No, Sasuke didn’t kill him. Itachi died on his own)
Itachi vs Orochimaru (Man, Itachi may look mellow but when it comes to Orochimaru he is a pure Sass. He screwed that snake up both the times by a wide margin. It seems Uchiha brothers like to fuck up Orochimaru, LOL)
Talk-No-Jutsu’ing Naruto (Geez, Naruto was being completely bratty and was full of saviour complex like he was going to bear everyone’s hatred by himself. I was almost annoyed. Thanks to Itachi, he realised. Probably he is the only character to shut Naruto using his own jutsu)
Izanami’ing Kabuto (Other than Naruto, he is the only character to go out of his way to empathize with a villain and put extreme effort to change him. I think this is why Sasuke loves Naruto, for seeing these similarities??? ).
Goodbye to Sasuke (The first time when he said ‘Forgive me, Sasuke. This is the last’ by poking his forehead and finally closing the distance by butting with Sasuke’s head softly saying ‘I will love you always’.... It always evokes uncontrollable tears in me, no matter how many times I watch it 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭)
HONOURABLE MENTION
Uchiha Obito
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God, Am such a sucker for Uchiha guys individually, though collectively as a clan they fucked up big time. I simply couldn’t find the place for him in the top 10. He is a classic example of What Naruto will be like if he becomes a villain?
However, all those horrible stuffs he did just for a girl whom he had a crush on which was never reciprocated seems childish. That’s why I couldn’t put him in Top 10.
And his understandable but weird obsession on Naruto was always enjoyable to watch. 
One cute thing I liked about him was, whatever criminal stuffs he may have done, he was never a cheapskate though. He had every chance to take back Kakashi’s Sharingan to activate his own Susanoo. But he never even thought of such an idea. He was a bad guy. But a good friend, no matter what. 
Pure Baby!!! But lost his way!!!
Best Moments:
Importance of Team Work (’In the ninja world, Those who break the rules are  scum. But those who abandon their comrades are worse than scum’. This very legacy he left to Kakashi came to defeat him later. And Naruto follows this motto even today)
Sacrificing his Sharingan (’I am giving you my Sharingan. No matter what the villagers say, you are a great Jonin. Please take it’. Awww!!! Obito. He left his Sharingan which helped Kakashi to complete a jutsu called ‘Chidori’, which is a go-to jutsu of Sasuke)
Thanks for the ask, anon. I thoroughly enjoyed writing this. ❤️
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gaycatwizard · 3 years
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I feel like "bad/flawed characters that are still likeable" are just some of the Best characters and tend to have a bit more emotional staying power, that they're more relatable and more interesting, more memorable. We need more of them, but they're really... hard to do? Not necessarily hard to make, but hard to do well. Because the amount of flaws and Badness (in a moral/philosophical sense, not quality of a character's design and personality) can vary so drastically, along with the amount of redeeming traits and their potency. It can be hard to want to "copy" or mimic the exact ratio from the character that inspired you. Tangent: it's fine to be inspired by one or more works. It's fine to allow it to influence your works. It's hard distinguishing from "I want to do x, but that's basically just rewriting one of my inspirations but with a palette swap" and "this inspires me so I want to use certain elements/themes/ideas/technical aspects of it." That's not the issue here, y'know. But like... I think the sheer variety you can have in Loveable Asshole characters like that, in the ratio of how bad and how good they are, is part of what makes them so interesting, so realistic, so powerful. Like... there are characters who are overall pretty good people, but are rough around the edges in a way that clearly makes them sympathetic and likeable. There are characters who are basically layer upon layer upon layer of mistakes, hatred, and bile with the tiniest nugget of good at the center, that you rarely get a glimpse of, but feel something raw and enthralling because of that. Like... I think Bojack Horseman is a good example, especially because it has a lot of different Likeable Bad People varieties and it does them all really well. Also Bojack Horseman is a good show and, not unlike JoJo's Bizarre Adventure, I want to talk about it at every given opportunity. Bojack himself is a cynical, selfish, destructive, defensive, spiteful, jealous, vain, self-loathing, stubborn piece of shit. He's a bad person and that's... kind of the point of the show. But his entire character, his entire arc that spans the whole of the series, revolves around the diamond buried deep in that rough. He wants to change, but he's so set in his negative ways (and so used to being surrounded by such negativity and toxicity) that he doesn't really know how. Every time he wants to change, he doesn't know how and fails to keep up with his new habits. Every time he's doing well and making progress, some external factor comes in and pushes him violently back down the mountain, back to square one. But he makes an effort, it's very obvious that he doesn't like being this way, that he regrets the things he does, that he feels remorse for the pain he's caused, and he does finally change and improve, things do finally get better for him. His foil (who has such an AMAZING dynamic and relative arc with him I could write a whole essay just on that), Mr. Peanutbutter, is sort of the exact opposite. They have similar careers and positions in the world, but everything goes right for Mr. Peanutbutter. Everyone likes him, everything is handed to him on a silver platter, he's perfect, he's happy, he's attractive, he's popular, he's everything Bojack isn't, and yet somehow he's drawn to Bojack and always wants to try and be his friend. But as Bojack slowly improves over the show and the softer, nicer, Better side of him becomes more and more prominent and common, the negative side of Mr. Peanutbutter slowly gets revealed over the show. He's also selfish and stubborn and stupid and persistent and dangerously disconnected from reality and his interpersonal skills are absolute shit. He puts on that act to make people like him. As the show goes on, it's slowly revealed that he doesn't really pay attention to the wants or needs of others, like, at all. That he only ever really cares about himself and just wants to do and be everything and anything as long as people like him and it makes him happy, regardless of who it hurts. It's amazing. It's in F is
for Family, too. Netflix Adult Animated Sitcoms are very often hit or miss, but these two are absolute homeruns. Frank, the protagonist, of F is for Family is selfish, violent, short-tempered, arrogant, judgmental, ignorant... but he's remorseful and introspective and intelligent and, in a very convoluted and misguided way most of the time, incredibly caring and devoted. He is a piece of shit and he's terrible, and a lot of why he's still likeable, why he's allowed to be so politically incorrect and abusive is due to the setting. Parenting norms were different back then and, now with hindsight, we know that those norms weren't good and you should NEVER hit or yell at or emotionally degrade your kids. The show is a perfect mix of "everyone is a product of their time and environment" and "no matter the time and place, people are people and we have the same thoughts and feelings and struggles," all without glorifying or excusing the terrible actions of the characters with the excuse of the time period or due to being "protagonists" or having redeeming traits. They're human, flawed, some incredibly so, and that's what makes it so good. It's part of why I like F is for Family more than most Adult Animated Family Sitcoms. You've got the typical stupid, selfish, arrogant, etc. Bad Dad and his Housewife, but there's still chemistry. They're still unique, three dimensional characters that clearly love each other and have a reason to still be together despite arguing and hardship. Same with how Frank and Sue treat their kids. They're not great parents, but they're trying to do their best (which isn't always good) and they do clearly love their kids and want the best for them. Their kids are resentful at times and hate their parents for some of the things they do, but they do stick together at the end of the day because there's that underlying realization that none of the mistreatment is done with malicious intent. That doesn't excuse it, but they're all just fucked up and trying to do their best. And they do have sad, relatable characters that are clearly bad people and aren't likeable, despite having sympathetic traits. Like Ginny. Her husband, that she loves dearly, is gay and simply doesn't love her the way she loves him, their marriage is hollow and empty. But she constantly forces her suffering on others, regardless of whether they want to hear it or are emotionally equipped to do so. Attempting to leave the conversation or explain that other people have problems too means, to Ginny, that you're a terrible human being who can't be there for someone in pain or that you're selfish and disgusting and never stop thinking of yourself. She has every right to be upset, but she takes it out on others and manipulates them, and that's not okay, and the show depicts it that way. There are so many options for character arcs with these characters, too. They don't even have to be related to their flaws, they can be entirely external or related to something like relationships or interests. You can show someone working on their flaws, acknowledging that they're not perfect and they might be bad, but that they want to do better and actively try to do so; they don't avoid responsibility or blame others, they own up to it and do their best to improve. Hell, even just coming to the realization that you are responsible for your actions, not anyone else, and that you have to put in effort to change could be that arc. You can have someone get worse, whether an intentional path of bad decisions without regard for others or a failure to understand which decisions are right. Some people have redeeming traits, but still aren't redeemable. Some people don't get better. Some people still get better, but get worse first. There are so many real, relatable options that show the darker, uglier side of life that we so desperately want to experience and perceive (likely due to the cathartic and taboo aspects), and bringing up flaws and shortcomings and anything else in this context can start interesting conversations and challenge
us to think about things we may not have before, or from a new perspective.
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gothamslittlejester · 4 years
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Obsessive Ledger!joker x reader
I’ve been spoiling you all recently with all this Ledger!Joker, so you’re welcome 😎 (but also so sorry because I did go on a hiatus without saying anything for half a year 😬). Let me know in the asks if you want something in particular, I love writing for J so much! I have a few already that I am working on as we speak, so stay tuned for those 💜
Below are headcannons for a more yandere and darker joker than I usually write 👻 nothing abusive here because J is still very much my comfort character, but it definitely includes over-possessive, protective and stalker themes, as well as encouraging reader to join in on his murderous chaos
Warnings: morally ambiguous reader, joining joker on his “fun” i.e. mentions of torturing others, blood, weapons, severed body parts as gifts, implied seggsy time
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· Before adoration, fondness or love, the first feelings Joker had for you was pure obsession. Obsession with what you thought and felt, what you liked to do and why you liked to do them. Obsession with your safety and the need to protect you, which led to jealousy and possessiveness very often. It was primal, and longing, and left him thirsting after your presence like a greedy, hungry wolf. He wanted you- needed you- and he was going to get you
·In spite of a period of flirting, suggestive jokes and hinting touches, Joker made it clear pretty quickly what his feelings were for you. Because of his lifestyle death is like a waiting shadow, and wasting time on what he wants is just not his style  
· Quite soon into the beginning of your more romantic relationship, you move into his hideout for the sake of your safety, which calmed J down with some of his possessiveness and paranoid thoughts. He knew his home was the safest place in Gotham, excluding Bruce Wayne’s cave, and with you in it that meant you were safe too.
·When he’s gone, he’ll leave a huge shotgun behind for you to use in case of emergency, as well as Chechen’s Rottweilers. You’ll find some stray knives and pointy objects hidden in your coats too, “just in case”, but its more heartwarming to you than annoying
· He loves to lay on you at night, whether it be right on your chest to hear your heartbeat, or on your belly where he can feel your soft skin pressed against his scared cheeks. Not only is it pleasant and lets his touched-starved soul get some attention, but it also makes him hyper aware of every shift or move your body does while asleep. It also prevents you from sneaking out of the bed to run away, which is one of his more paranoid thoughts. Don’t try to move away or push him off, he will smack your hand back and snuggle in deeper, wrapping his arms around you like a snake
· He doesn’t care what insecurities you have regarding your appearance; he admires every single piece of you and will cuddle with whatever he wants, so push your anxieties aside because Joker hungers for all of you
· His gifts can sometimes be very macabre. Generally, he loves to spoil you with an array of things, such as new clothes or lingerie, plush toys of your favorite animals, snacks you said you’ve wanted to try, or even just random knick-knacks he stole from his victim’s homes. However, if he’s feeling adventurous or extra flirty that day, he will bring you certain body parts to symbolize his feelings for you.
· You’ve definitely found your fair share of human hearts in your fridge, because he adores how your heart races when your scared. You’ve found a pair of lungs stuffed in there too, because the little gasps you make when frightened or anticipating his touch are delicious to him. You went to get milk once and right behind the carton was a tongue, symbolizing how much he relishes your little talks and midnight conversations
· Once, he brought over a whole corpse, the body decomposing and gnarled, skin ripped to shreds and a face pummeled so brutally it had concaved. “Don’t need to worry about them any more doll,” he giggled, spitting on the body with a fervor that thrilled you. It took a few minutes of intense staring- why did they look familiar?-  but then it clicked in your mind; it was the very person you had fumed and vented to Joker about last night, right before he had spontaneously left
· “J,” you began, eyes nearly popping out of your head. “Did you kill him... for me?”
· “ ‘Course I did, sweetheart.” He rolled his eyes like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “You know I’d, uh, kill anyone for you. Nasty fucks like them especially-ah.”
· If you have to leave for longer periods of time, whether that be for school or work, Joker will always have a few of his men stalking you from a distance, making sure you’re safe and that no one dangerous is within a 1 mile radius of you. They also have explicit instructions to take photos and send them to J, because he likes looking at your oblivious little face.
· He’d do it himself if he has the time, which he sometimes does, but he too is quite busy with his own things (when anarchy calls, as they say), so hiring lookouts is the next best thing. If he could, he’d have you right by his side at all times… how pretty you’d look in a soft purple leash... but that’s just daydream fuel for now
· Speaking of photos, Joker knows his ways around a camera. He makes... lovely home videos that he sends to news channels in his free time (rip fake batman) and he continues to practice at his craft from time to time. He even won a deepweb award for best snuff film of the year, which boosted his ego to ungodly heights. He’s absolutely delighted about it and hints that you should watch it on one of your movie nights, but he does warn it’s not for the faint of heart
· Taking videos and photos are one of his favorite hobbies, and if you’re down to clown… he’d certainly bring it in the bedroom
· Speaking of his more thrilling hobbies, Joker will constantly suggest you join him on his escapades or help out behind the scenes, especially if he picks up on any sort of interest from you concerning his ‘job’. Joker is an observant man, and he reads you like a book. He knows you likely have some dark, sinister thoughts running around in your head - you must, if you’re with him- so he does everything he can to encourage you to let them out. Joker will never judge this side of you, no matter how grim. He’ll try and harness it, bring it to light. He hates the thought of you shying away from your true self, embarrassed of your darker nature, but what he hates even more is you thinking he’ll be disgusted with you or disappointed. How can you think that?
· “No no no, bunny, not me. You’re my muse, so give me some inspiration hmm? Tell daddy exactly what’s going on in that mind of yours...”
·  If you do show interest in the darker side of his job, he’d smile so big that his scars take up his whole face. He’d teach you everything; how to fire a gun, how to stab someone, how to hide a body and how to torture one. He’ll spread out all his weapons on the floor and let you choose which one calls to you, like a deranged ceremony, informing you on the pros and cons of each one. He’ll even invite you into the warehouses he designated just for torture, which are just as gruesome and sinful and they sound
· J let’s you watch as he hurts his victims, whom are purposefully rapists and killers to make you feel less guilty, and let’s you join in on the fun whenever you gain the courage. He even went as far as to buy a whole torture set off the black market, from scalpel to needles, just to give you options. Joker loves to see how creative you can get, and it’s one of the few times he lets you take complete control
· “The floor is yours, bunny. Impress me.”
· He is down for pretty much anything, and that mindset is not exclusive just to the bedroom
·Any couple activity you fear might be too far or creepy for other people… is right around J’s alley. Weird kinks or foreplay games you want to try? No problem. Making love in abandoned houses or cemeteries? Now that’s his type of romance. You want to carry a small vial of his blood around your neck? He is all game, but only if he gets one of you as well. Matching knives? He’s blushing. Satanic blood ritual from a sketchy website that’s supposed to bond your souls for eternity? Perfect, his weekend plans were centered around you anyways
· Now…If he feels that you’re not giving him enough attention or start to push him away, he will resort to crazier means to obtain your love back. He’ll set off random bugs, rats or even henchmen into your home to scare you, gleefully waiting to hear you cry out his name in fear. Like a small, dependent little kitten, mewling for their protector. He’d come in, guns ablaze, looking for whatever scared his darling angel, killing them on sight. You’d run into his arms, tears streaming down your face as you cling to Joker like your life depended on it- just how he liked it. He’d coo mockingly and pull you closer, rubbing your back as he unashamedly basked in your physical touch.
· In general however, your soft caresses, kisses and reassuring words are enough to keep him very pleased. He knows you adore him and are head over heels obsessed just like he is, and that truly does put a smile on his face.
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bqstqnbruin · 4 years
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8 Letters
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OR: 4 times he couldn’t say he loved you + 1 time he did
Ok, here we are with the very over hyped Vince fic! This was inspired by 8 Letters by Why Don’t We and has been swimming around in my head for a while before I realize it fits with this himbo. 
Shoutouts to the following (and hopefully this is short because this is not an awards show even though it would be fun to pretend it is): @vincecdunn because Nikki’s the reason I’m on the Vince train so as retaliation I’m just going to keep sending her ideas for more fics to write, @pucksnsticksnhockeyboys and @broadstbroskis for allowing me to come into your inboxes and be annoying and bounce ideas off of, and then @pettypetey and @pumpkinpatchmakar for the ways to say I love you and I’m 100% forgetting people but that’s just because I suck
Other people who wanted to be tagged: @all-time-fanatic @marialovesdean @oyeinpayne @ghstandpucks @maybehockeymaybenot​ @itzelmunoz and @thecasualyogi (unsure why it isn’t letting me tag you sad boi)
So, here we go, all 7.8k words of this 4+1
______________________
I
Tonight was one of the first nights in a while that the two of you were able to spend together, Vince on the road on and off for what felt like longer than usual and you just drowning at work. Any chance you got to be together at this point was almost always spent alone in the comforts of your place or his. You were spending it at your place, watching him stand at the stove as he cooked dinner for the two of you. 
“God, who you have thought someone could look so sexy stirring pasta,” you admire him, propping yourself up on your elbows to watch him. 
He laughs, putting the large spoon on the counter, turning around to face him. Vince approaches you, pulling you close to him. His hand finds the small of back, the other tilting your chin up to him. He bites his lip, looking down at you. “You think that’s sexy, just wait,” he says, his lips planted against yours before you can say anything else. 
You pull away at the sound of splashing water, seeing the pot boiling over. “Ah, fuck,” Vince releases his grip and runs to turn the burner down, you laughing as he goes back to stirring the boiling bubbles away.
“You know what’s great about this?” you say, sarcasm dripping in your voice.
“Oh no,” he mutters, bringing the pot over to the sink to drain the excess water, knowing that whatever you’re going to say isn’t going to be great for him. 
“You get to clean up.”
He puts the now empty pot back on the stove, shaking the remaining water off the pasta in the strainer, “But I made the dinner!” 
“Yeah, and then you made the mess.” 
He turns to you, a mischievous look on his face. “You’re evil,” he says, lunging at you, lifting you off the ground and sending you into a fit of giggles as you try to wriggle your way free of his grasp. 
“Vince!” you squeal, your arms overlapping his. “Put me down!” 
“I like holding you, though,” he whines, putting you down without letting you go.
You turn around to face him, putting your hand on his face, tracing a random pattern on his cheek with your thumb. “Hold me on the ground and after you put the pesto on the pasta,” you tell him, giving him a quick kiss before pushing him away. “I thought you didn’t like pesto?”
He shrugs, putting pasta into the bowls you hand him. “I’m not crazy about it, but it’s your favorite, so I’ll put up with it for you.” 
You can feel the heat rushing to your cheeks over something so simple. “You’re nice,” you tell him, in a sing-songy voice, taking a bite of the pasta.
“Only to you,” he says, sending you a wink that makes your insides flutter. 
Properly full from the simple dinner, after you clean the dishes and Vince cleans the stove, you retreat to your bedroom where you planned on spending the rest of the night. “What do you want to watch tonight?” Vince asks you, settling onto your bed with your TV remote in hand. 
He reaches his arm out, gesturing for you to come snuggle up next to him, perfectly fitting against him as he kisses the top of your head, the warmth from his body comforting you more than the blankets that covered your bed probably ever would. “Gossip Girl,” you insist, knowing what his reaction would be.
Vince groans, throwing his head back. “Come on, that show is so bad.”
You look up at him, imitating the puppy dog eyes and signature pout he would give you all too often when he was asking you to do something. “Yes. But that’s what makes it so good to watch,” you plead.
He rolls his eyes, giving in and pulling it up on your Netflix. “Now how could I say no to that face,” he tells you.
“You can’t,” you tell him as he pulls up the show. 
Letting out a small, “Yay,” you earn a giggle from his lips before kissing him quickly and settling into the show. You start with the first episode of the second season, Vince stroking your arm absentmindedly, laughing at how cheesy the show is. He steals the occasional glance at you, loving how closely you could pay attention to anything in front of you, analyzing, critiquing, admiring what was before you. You did it with anything and everything that you fixated on, something Vince could never do and something he loved about you.
Not that you’ve said you love each other yet. But, you were the only thing he could focus on outside of hockey at any moment. 
“The true reason I should stay right where I am and not get in the car,” the two of you watch Blair Waldorf on your screen in her scene with Chuck Bass. “Three words. Eight letters. Say it, and I’m yours.”
The screen cuts to Chuck, his hesitation. “I-I...”
“Thank you. That’s all I needed to hear,” with Blair getting in the car, leaving Chuck standing there watching the girl he knew he loved drive off with his heart. 
That part always made you cry, letting out a soft sob at the sight of the character you hated the most, actually experiencing heartbreak, slightly humanizing the demon that you thought he was. Vince, paying more attention to you than the show, had no clue what was happening.
“This is a dumb question,” he starts, watching you wipe the tears that had fallen down your face, “But what are the three words?”
You sit up, your hand placed on his thigh sending a chill through his body. “I love you.”
His eyes go wide, swallowing hard. Given what just happened in the episode, he knew it was ridiculous to think, but he couldn’t help but wonder if what just happened on your screen would happen right now. “Are... are those the words or are you telling me?” he asks, his voice shaking.
You hesitate for a moment. You had been together for five months already. He was the person you trusted the most, no matter how dumb he might be sometimes. You would do anything for him, and you were sure that he would do anything for you. You thought about him constantly, but you had never been in love before. Whatever you felt for Vince was something you hadn’t felt for anyone. “Both,” you decide, seeing the panic wash over his face. “You don’t have to say it back. I’m not gonna leave you if you don’t,” you reassure him.
He opens and closes his mouth like a fish, trying to muster up the courage to actually say what he wanted to. He knows how he feels about you, but, “I can’t say it.” You knew the pain you felt at hearing those words flashed over your face for a moment because of the quick, “I’m sorry,” he let out before getting up off your bed and heading for the door.
“Vince, hey, wait,” you say, chasing after him and beating him to your door. With your back against it, you look at your boyfriend, panicked, breathing fast, hands shaking. “Vince,” you say his name again, hearing it coming from you calming him down, “You don’t have to say it. I promise. Just please, don’t leave.” 
He studies your face, the pain that he just caused you still showing. “I’m sorry,” he whispers, dropping his head.
“Hey,” you say, tilting his head up to look at you. “Listen to me when I say this: it’s fine. I don’t want you to feel pressured to say it just because I did. I told you that because I do love you. If you don’t feel the same way, that’s fine. I can’t force you to love me,” you tell him, smiling through it. He had to know it was a fake smile, just using it to hide how you really felt. “You still want to be with me, right?”
He hesitated for longer than he should have, even though his answer popped into this head immediately. “What? Of course I do. Can we just,” he takes a deep breath, trying to find his words, “Do you think we can watch something else?”
You nod, taking his hand and leading you back to your bed. You just fucked everything up, didn’t you? But Vince’s panic and now lack of attention to even the Netflix catalogue he was scrolling through was more worrisome than him not saying he loves you. “Actually,” you say, gently taking the remote from his hands, “Do you think we can talk about this? Like, I’m ok with it, but, I don’t know, you’re kind of worrying me.” 
He can’t look at you, staring at the TV instead as the now muted screen flashed with characters he didn’t recognize. “I don’t know,” he lies. “The girls I was with before I met you kinda fucked me up I guess.” You could feel your heart breaking watching him like this, more so than when you watched Chuck and Blair. “I thought I was in love with them, but then it always ended with them using me for my money, because I play in the NHL, for sex. I mean, my purity score thing is so low for a reason, right?” he jokes, you trying to smile even though you could feel yourself wanting to cry. “Fuck, one of them even called Sammy because she liked him more while I was asleep in the bed next to her and asked him to go pick her up.” 
You take his face in your hands, pulling him in for a kiss. Using the pads of your thumbs, you wipe away the tears that you got on him, unsure if they were just yours or if he had started crying, too. “I will never do that to you,” you assure him. “I’ll even call Sammy and tell him that you’re better.” 
He laughs, sniffling a little bit. “Can you do that every day? Really wear down his self esteem.”
You laugh, giving him a quick kiss, happy that he was at least smiling again. “I’m not going to emotionally destroy a man.” 
“But it’s Sammy!”
II
You, Nikki, and Patricia were sitting on Nikki’s couch together, each with one glass of wine for the night because of the need to drive later, pizza, popcorn, and much more junk food than you would like to admit. Dressed as if you hadn’t seen daylight in years, you all had on sweatpants, sweatshirts, hair tied back, makeup free, everything that would signal to an outsider that you had all stopped caring, but to you, it was just a night in after work. It was a much needed girls night, the stress of work getting to all of you while you sat there with your best friends trying to find something to watch. With the boys off on a road trip, you could definitely use the company. Part of you was bothered by Vince not saying he loves you, but could you really justifiably get upset but that? 
“What are we watching?” Nikki asks, pulling up Netflix, practically forcing you to relive the conversation with Vince from the other night. 
“Uh, Gilmore Girls?” Patricia suggests.
Without saying a word, Nikki plays the episode she left off on, Rory and Dean celebrating their anniversary together by going out to what was supposed to be a nice, sweet night. 
“What do you think Connecticut is like?” Patricia asks about the setting of the iconic show. 
“My ex in college was from Connecticut. Nothing good comes from Connecticut,” comes from Nikki, you barely hearing her as you fixate on the episode.
“Gilmore Girls comes from Connecticut.”
Without missing a beat, Nikki says, “One good thing comes from Connecticut.” The two of them keep talking, you barely hearing anything they say as you watch Dean and Rory in the car that Dean had built for her, telling her he loves her for the first time. Rory doesn’t say it back, the same expression on her face that you say on Vince’s that night. “Hey, Y/N, what’s up?” Nikki asks, snapping you away from the show. 
“Oh, nothing, why?” you lie through your teeth, your best friends exchanging concerned looks.
“You know that you’re crying, right?” Patricia asks, snagging the remote and pausing the episode.
You reach up, feeling your now damp cheeks, wiping away the tears you didn’t even know were there that were brimming in your eyes. “Oh, wow,” you let out, laughing a little bit. “I guess the episode just got to me,” you lie again. Nikki sits there, eyebrow raised, lips pursed as if to say ‘bitch, please,’ while Patricia just sat there, waiting for you to answer. “I told Vince I love him,” you start.
You get cut off by the two of them screaming, “Oh my god!” and “What did he say?”
“He,” you sigh, debating on telling them the truth or not. “He panicked and couldn’t say it.” 
Both of them gasp, you trying to figure out what emotions they felt; anger, sadness, disappointment, you swear all of it flashed on their face.
“Dump his ass!” Nikki yells, loud enough that her neighbors could probably hear her. 
You take a handful of popcorn, throwing it at her in response, Patricia laughing and dodging the mess the two of you were creating as kernels flew past her face. “I’m not dumping him! He said he’s afraid of getting hurt,” you tell them once you stop throwing the food at each other. 
“Does he think you’re going to hurt him?” Patricia asks, concern washing over her face.
“If he thinks that, you dump him,” Nikki pips in.
“You cut that out,” you fire back, pointing your finger at her. The ridiculousness of the simple action made all of you laugh, forgetting for a moment the conversation at hand. 
“Do you really love him?” Patricia asks another question, both her and Nikki with the same expression on their faces.
You feel a soft smile growing on your face, nodding. “I really do. I’ve never loved anyone like I love him. Can we just talk about something else, please?”
They go back to talking about Connecticut, you trying to keep up with their banter. 
“Wait, so why did you date that Connecticut boy?” you finally join the conversation, asking Nikki.
She shrugs, shoving the popcorn that was still in the bowl into her mouth. “Connecticut boys have money. I figured I could get some nice shit from him.”
“So you're a gold digger?” you tease her, Patricia nearly spitting out her wine.
Nikki sits there, mouth open pretending to be offended. “Talk about being a gold digger, you’re dating a professional athlete!”
You mirror her look, Patricia laughing as the innocent bystander in this. “Fuck,” is you can muster out before the three of you are laughing together. 
“How could he not love that!” Nikki says once you catch your breath, pointing to the smile on your face and immediately making you turn red.
“Are you flirting with her?” Patricia asks
“Someone has too,” she shrugs, winking at you while sipping her wine.
You sit there, in awe of her bluntness. “If Vince were here he would get mad at you.”
“Where are they, anyway?” Patricia asks, changing the subject before Nikki can flirt with you more or make other snarky comments about your boyfriend.
“You see,” you start, setting down your glass of wine, “Vince told me they were going to California but when I checked the schedule it said they were going to play the Florida Panthers tomorrow,” you explain, all of you unable to contain your laughter, “so I think he’s confused.” 
The three of you fall back into a rhythm that doesn’t involve talking about your boyfriend who was just about off your mind. After a few hours, you’re all yawning, the single glass of wine having no effect on you as you drowned out the alcohol with more water than anything so you could drive, Nikki kicking you out so she can go to sleep. 
While you and Patricia are walking to your cars, your phone starts buzzing, an incoming Facetime call from Vince. You answer, immediately turning the camera away from you, “Hey, babe, I’m walking to my car.” 
“And you’re not showing me yourself because you don’t want me to see the guy walking you there?” he jokes, smirking at the camera. He was in the bed in his hotel room, the white sheets pulled up just low enough that his chest was exposed, shirtless as he always was when he was ready to sleep. He knew what he was doing; showing just enough of himself that it would drive you crazy enough to be distracted.
“Yeah, this is the man,” you tease, panning over to Patricia getting into your car, “Say hi to Vince!”
“I’m stealing your girl!” she yells, ducking into her car and shutting her door, Vince’s laugh echoing in the air. 
You prop your phone up in the thing your mom got you, suctioned to your dash so you can still see your phone while driving, even though you told her you had Apple CarPlay and had no need for it. Driving down the street, you fall into a mundane conversation with Vince about getting to Florida, teasing him for confusing it with California, telling him about the girls night you just had.
“Come on, show me your face!” you hear him whine. Without taking your eyes off the road, you know exactly the look on his face: those green eyes of his wide like a puppy, his bottom lip jutted out and if he weren’t holding his phone, his hands would be intertwined in themselves under his chin to show you he was begging. 
“No, I look gross. My hair is tied back, I have no makeup on, and I’m in a groutfit.”
“Have you ever seen me?” 
You roll your eyes, hitting the button to flip the camera now that you were at a red light. “Yes, I’ve seen you. You’re hot,” you say without shame. 
“Fuck,” you hear him let out a long and low whisper. You roll your eyes at him, even though you can’t help but blush and smile at the way he was practically visibly drooling over you. “I didn’t know gross could be so beautiful.” 
“I look like a Founding Father, shut up,” you say, glad it was dark enough that he couldn’t see the heat rushing to your cheeks. 
He laughs again, making you smile even wider at the sound. “Who would have thought I would like sleeping with a Founding Father.” 
“That is necrophilia!” you scream, loud enough that you could probably be heard outside your car, drowning out the sound of his laugher. “I never want to hear you say anything like that ever again!”
You pull up to your building, getting out and walking to your place while Vince rambles on about something that Sammy had done on the plane. “Oh!” he says once you unlock your door, startling you and almost dropping your phone, “Look what I got you!” 
“You got me something?” you ask him, walking through your dark apartment into your room. 
“I saw and I liked it and thought you would like it so I had to get it!” he says like a giddy child. He holds up a small stuffed puppy, shoving it almost too close to the camera, “Can you see the tag on his collar?”
He pulls it away slightly, the letter on it becoming clear. “His name is Vince!” you exclaim, the biggest smile on his face as he holds it next to him.
“Because you say when I get excited I remind you of a little puppy.” He sits there with the small stuffed animal pressed to his face, beaming at his purchase that he couldn’t wait to give you, even though he ruined the surprise he had anticipated because he couldn’t wait until he got home to see you. You take a screenshot, unable to hide how adorable you found him in that moment.
“I love it, Vince. I can’t wait for you to get home,” you say to him, a big yawn coming from him. His eyes get droopy, the way he gets before he’s about to fall asleep, a lazy smile on his face that means he felt the same.
You settle onto your bed, turning on your tv to watch whatever was on. You sit there in silence holding your phone, yawning a few times yourself. “Hey, babe, I’m gonna go to sleep,” you say, leaning over to turn off your lights, “I love you,” you say, forgetting that you're upset over his inability to say it back, seeing that he was already asleep, anyway, unable to return with a response. 
III
You were swamped with work, having to hustle on a Saturday to get everything done. Vince was tired of being cooped up inside, only really going out when he had practice or a game, so he was the one to suggest going to the coffee shop half way between your apartments in order to just be somewhere that wasn’t the four walls of your apartments.
“You’re not working,” he says in a teasing voice, watching you sit there staring out the window at the people passing by.
“I just,” you sigh, “I don’t want to do this project.”
“Can I help?” he asks, getting up from his seat and standing behind you, just enough room between your chair and the wall for him to fit and lean against you. “You’re on Facebook.”
You look up at him, an innocent look on your face. “I’m using a rewards system!” you defend yourself. “I was working for half an hour, so I’m watching a video as a break.” You scroll back to the video you were just watching as he rests his hands on your shoulders, rubbing the slightly. You find the video of an artist with a bunch of metal strips, twisting them into a metal tree art piece. You turn to him, eyes wide with excitement, a huge smile on your face that he can’t help but roll his eyes at, mirroring your smile. “Isn’t it cool?”
“You’re acting like a child. That’s my job,” he says, kissing your cheek before going back to sit down.
“That just means you’ve rubbed off on me. Or maybe I’ve rubbed off on you?” you wonder, scrolling to find one more video to watch. The next video is scene from That 70’s Show, and old favorite of yours that you haven’t seen since it was taken off Netflix. Eric and Donna were in a car, probably the Vista Cruiser in one of the earlier seasons judging by how young they look. The captions on, your sound off, you read the scene instead of watching. It was Donna telling Eric she loved him, only for him to panic and respond with, “I love cake.” The smile on your face disappears, looking up at Vince and thankful that he was paying more attention to his phone than he was to you. 
You just wanted him to say he loved you. You were sure that he did, and you had told him that you did. But he couldn’t say it. You were constantly going back and forth between being ok with it and being upset by it, knowing that it wasn’t fair to force him to say something if he didn’t mean it, but also knowing that it wasn’t fair to you to spill your guts to him for him to remain closed off. 
You take a deep breath, switching back to the tab that had the new marketing pitch you were working on. You get to typing, focusing on the project while you see four other cursors working on different parts, occasionally switching to another section to check one of your partners' work while they do the same for you. You barely notice the people around you, the coffee shop practically packed to capacity as an afternoon rush came in. Vince would look up from his phone, stealing the occasional glance while you take no notice. 
You both jump at the sound of someone knocking on the window next to you. Look up, Vince knew who it was immediately, irritated by your “Oh my god!” sqeual as you practically leap from the table to run outside.
Vince watches as you jump into the guys arms, a huge smile on your face, unable to read your lips as you talk with him. The guy was more attractive than Vince had remembered. Fuck, he looked like a model, and there Vince was, a hockey player, mad about it.
“How have you been?” you ask your friend Jack, someone you hadn’t seen in years. 
“Pretty good,” he tells you, his arms lingering on your waist once you pull away from the hug you practically forced on him in the first place. “You?”
“Good, busy. Getting out with my boyfriend instead of acting like an old agoraphobic couple,” you tell him motioning to Vince sitting at the table, arms crossed over his chest. You both wave to him, Vince mirroring with a wave and a very unenthusiastic look. “Who’s apparently tired from practice,” you lie, hoping he would buy the explanation for Vince’s unexpected attitude. 
“Isn’t he a hockey player?” You look back at Vince who’s now looking down at his phone, nodding, a soft smile on your face as you just stare at your dumb boyfriend. “You really have a thing for athletes, huh?”
You roll your eyes, knowing what he was referencing: Jack was technically your ex, having hooked up a few times, gone out on a few dates, he even brought you to a family wedding of his because you were seeing each other when the invitations went out, breaking up not long after the event. You never called him your boyfriend, and as far as you were concerned, you weren’t his girlfriend, but still, you weren’t just friends. “Hockey players are a little better than baseball players, bub,” you tell him, knowing it would hurt his ego a little bit.
He scrunches his face, pretending to be hurt but laughing anyway. “You always know how to hit a guy where it hurts, Y/L/N,” he tells you, both of you nodding. You were about to tell him goodbye, missing your chance when he says, “Do you think I could meet your new guy?”
You feel your breath stop for a moment, your eyes going wide at the thought of your ‘ex’ meeting your boyfriend. “Uh, sure, if you want to?” you tell him, obviously unsure of the situation that was about to unfold. “Vince?” you snap his attention away from his phone, the two of you standing over him. “This is my friend Jack. We went to school together,” you say, Jack extending his hand for Vince to shake. 
Vince swallows hard, a wave of jealousy washing over him as this guy stands in front of him. “Nice to meet you,” he says, a cold tone in his voice. You shoot him a look, Jack taking your seat while Vince pulls you into his lap without you expecting it, planting a firm kiss on your lips. “So, Jack, what do you do?” he asks the guy sitting across from you, holding you tight around your waist as if he were marking his territory.
You look at your boyfriend, confused by why he was acting like this. He sends you a soft smile, his eyes flickering down to your lips, making you melt a little as you turn your attention back to Jack. “I work in marketing.”
“Oh, just like, my girl here.” 
‘My girl?’ you mouth to yourself, unsure if either of the boys saw you. 
“That’s how we met,” Jack starts, a little confused as well by Vince’s actions. “We were both marketing majors so we had all of the same classes.” 
Vince keeps on asking Jack questions, practically leaving you out of the conversation, occasionally kissing your cheek while Jack was talking. 
“Wow, you two are clearly in love with each other,” Jack points out, shifting uncomfortably in his seat. Vince freezes, his heart racing against your chest as Jack gets up. “I’ve actually got to get going, but it was great seeing you, Y/N. We should catch up again.” 
You nod, agreeing with him as he leaves, taking your seat back across from Vince, glaring at him. “What the hell was that?” 
 “What? I can’t kiss your cheek occasionally?” he scoffs, leaning back in his chair. You watch as he stares out the window, Jack still in his view. 
“You never do it like that,” you point out. Then it dawns on you: “You were jealous! Why were you jealous?”
“I was not,” he pouts, his arms crossed. 
“You’re so cute when you’re jealous!” you squeal, careful not to be too loud in the quiet environment. His face turns red, his lips pursed as he stares out the window, clearly ready to deny it. You reach over to poke his cheeks, just to agitate him. 
He swats you away, hating that you were right. “You think I’m cute?”
“Why were you jealous?” you ask again. 
“You think I’m cute?” he says, leaning on the table.
You smirk at him, imitating his body language. “We both know I’m going to win this so you should just answer me now,” you say slowly.
“He’s the guy you dated in college,” Vince says.
“I never showed you his picture.”
He hesitates for a moment, knowing the exact reaction this was going to illicit: “I saw the pictures you posted with him on Instagram.”
You stop and think for a moment. The last time you even saw Jack was a few years ago. “Those pictures were from my freshman year of college. You’ve scrolled that far back on my page?”
He sticks out his bottom lip, eyes wide to give you his puppy dog face. “Sometimes, when I miss you, and I know you’re busy and can’t talk, I scroll through your Instagram so I can see your face.” 
You feel yourself melting at his words, the face he was giving you making you love him that much more. “Come here,” you tell him, pulling him up around the table. You take him by the collar down to your level, giving him a sweet kiss. “And, yes, I do think you’re really cute,” you say to him, kissing him again. 
IV
Vince watched in awe at his teammates. All of them were drunk, him, for once, being the most sober one around as they entered the bye week that took place around All-Star Weekend. He was waiting for you to show up, anxiously checking his phone to see if you had texted him anything saying that you and Patricia were at the bar. He hated being the only sober one, especially since it meant he would have to play dad if something happened unless you two showed up soon. 
“You’re not drinking?” Sammy asks him, two beers in hand. Someone would think one was for Vince, but, no, both were for Sammy as he put the openings of both bottles in his mouth at once. 
“I’m waiting for Y/N.” 
“You’re whipped!” Sammy slurs, sitting down next to his friend in the booth he was refusing to get up from while he anxiously shakes his leg waiting to see you, rolling his eyes even though part of him knew he was right.
“Stop that,” Vince says, getting up and trying to shake his friend off in the crowded bar.
“You love her, right? I mean you have to love her to be like this,” Sammy insists, something he wouldn’t be doing had he not been drunk. Vince opens and closes his mouth, trying to figure out how to say what he wanted. “Dude.”
“You know I can’t say it,” is all Vince can let out. Sammy knows his past, Sammy knows what has happened to Vince. Saying it would mess something up. Those eight letters would ruin what he had with you when they were out in the open. 
“I don’t know how to talk about this with you,” Sammy admits, eyes narrow since he was thinking about it anyway.
“I don’t think I want to talk about this with you.” 
Before Sammy can say anything else, like magic, you appear at his side, Patricia in tow. “Hey,” you say to him, kissing him as he wraps his arms around your waist. He pulls away, looking over your shoulder to see Sammy making faces at the two of you, Vince giving him a look that told him to go away without you noticing. 
Patricia wanders off with Sammy, leaving the two of you by yourselves. “How far deep are they?” you ask, dragging him to the bar so the two of you could start drinking, knowing you couldn’t drink so much that you would catch up with them, but enough that you wouldn’t have to act as the mother of the group.
“We’ve been here for an hour so I expect someone to be throwing up soon,” he laughs, not dropping your hand when the two of you sit down. 
“If you’re drunk, do you have to take care of them?” you ask him, signalling to the bartender to come take your drink orders. You fall into conversation, watching Sammy strike out with multiple girls, Patricia spending the entire night with a single guy following her, something she clearly enjoyed as she milked at least four free drinks out of him.
“Think she’ll go home with him?” Vince asks, nodding over to Patricia as he finishes what might have been this third drink that night. As far as he knew, no one was throwing up, but now, he didn’t have to worry about it if he was just a little drunk.
You shrug, putting down your now empty glass. “If they both want that I guess.” You could feel yourself getting bored and tired, wishing that you and Vince could just leave and go home yourselves. But he looked like he was having fun watching the guys, a smile on his face whenever they did something stupid. You study Vinces face, his slightly pursed lips and his eyes sparkling as he watched Sammy strike out with what was probably his fourth girl of the night, Vince smiling as he couldn’t help but laugh at his friend. Your attentioned is pulled away by your phone buzzing in your hand, Nikki bombarding you with texts. 
‘Have Vince watch these with you ;)’
She sends you two clips, both from a Halloween episode of New Girl. Unfamiliar with the show, you tap Vince to have him watch over your shoulder. You watch the two girls get into a limo, one going as far as exclaiming, “Hey, look! I’m in a limo! I wish I could have really long legs so I could stretch them out the length of the limo!”
The camera switches to a guy, telling them to have fun, saying, “I love you,” an immediate look of regret washing over his face, the girl in the limo responding with finger guns while her friend behind her mouthed, ‘No.’
You swallow hard, texting Nikki back yelling at her for it, definitely partially a product of the alcohol. You don’t even bother to look at the second video, afraid of what it would be and what it would bring considering the first one brought an awkward silence in the middle of the loud bar.
“Did you tell them?” he asks quietly, sitting back down next to you. 
You straighten your posture, forming a thin line with your lips. “Yeah. I did. It was bothering me more than I thought it would and they figured it out.” 
“How would they figure it out?” he snaps, his voice a little louder than it would have been had he not had so much to drink. “That’s not something you can just read on someone’s face.” 
You take in a deep breath, knowing that people were starting to turn to look at the fight you were about to have. “Come on,” you grab him by his arm, leading him outside so at least if you started really fighting, they couldn’t kick you out. “Look, we were watching something where someone said I love you and the other person didn’t and I started crying,” you explain to him, feeling tears brimming in your eyes.
The people around you in the city were staring as they walked by, two idiots on a weird night causing a scene in a public. “Y/N,” he says, taking a step towards you and reaching for your hand.
You snatch it away, startling him that you were so quick. “No, Vince. I know I said it was fine,” you sob, “But it hurts. It hurts to love someone who doesn’t love you back. And I know you’ve been hurt before, but you’re letting that get in the way of you and me, and I don’t know how much longer I can handle being in love with you when you won’t even say you love me.” 
He drops his head down, tears falling down his face while you were trying to fight your own from falling. “I’m sorry,” he whispers. “I’m sorry for being afraid, but I am.” 
“Do you love me?” you ask him, taking a step towards him. 
He looks up at you, both of you crying. His eyes are red, he looks like he’s in pain. He tries to say something, only to shake his head, taking you in for a hug before either of you can do anything else. You can feel him crying in your shoulder, one hand in your hair, the other at the top of your back. You stand there for a moment in shock, not sure how to react. You react into his hold, trying to calm him down. You had never seen him cry like this before, in fact, you weren’t sure you had ever seen him cry at all. You pull his head off your shoulder. His face soaked with tears. “I think you need to go home,” you tell him, wiping the tears from his face. 
He doesn’t say anything, just pulling you in for another hug when the guys and Patricia stumble out of the bar. “Hey, we’re going to go to another bar,” Patricia tells you as you shake your head, signalling that she shouldn’t ask what was going on. “Do you guys want to come?”
“We can?” Vince questions, only looking at you, his face still red from the sobbing he had just done. “Unless you don’t want to.” 
“You go with them. I’ll be fine, I want to go home anyway,” you insist, trying to push him off you. If there was one thing you hated, it was the kind of girls who made their boyfriends miss out on things with their friends because they insisted on attention, but you also didn’t want to be with him at this moment.
He smiles at you as you try to force yourself to not succumb to his looks, refusing to let go of you, “It’s not worth going with them if you aren’t going to be there with me.” 
“Then don’t go. I’m going home.” You break free of his grip, turning on your heels and walking down the street to go home by yourself. 
+one
“Dude, have you seen Nikki’s snapstory?” Sammy’s voice comes through Vince’s phone.
“No, why?” 
The concern in Sammy’s voice resonated with Vince, “I think you need to go look.”
Vince puts his teammate on speaker to go find one of your best friend’s story. “I’m looking now, hold on.”
Nikki was in her car, a picture of your favorite flowers in front of her steering wheel, your apartment building in the background. She had captioned it with ‘Bought my best friend flowers to go tell her I love her because her boyfriend won’t say it.’
“Ah, fuck,” Vince mutters, closing out the app.
“What are you gonna do about this?”
“I gotta go,” he says, hanging up before Sammy can say anything else. 
-------
You run to the door when you hear the knocking, hoping it was Vince since you hadn’t heard much from him since that night at the bar. Instead, you find Nikki standing in your doorway with your favorite flowers. “What are these?” you deadpan, still a little irritated with her.
“Vince won’t say I love you so I figured I would,” she tells you, kissing you on the cheek and brushing past you. “I love you!” she says, dramatically, plopping down on your couch and putting her feet on your coffee table.
You look at the flowers, biting your lip. You just wanted Vince to say it. But you get it. “They’re just eight letters. He doesn’t have to say it when he can just show it. And you sending that video the other night does not and will not help anything,” you scold her. 
You hear her scoff as you go to put the flowers in some water. “You know I was right to send that video. How does he show you he loves you? How could he possibly tell you he loves you without saying ‘I love you?’” 
Rolling your eyes, knowing that she’s seen him show you loves you plenty of times. You could either argue with her more over what she did, or just list the ways you knew she was already aware of. “He always makes sure I’m the last person he sends a text to or calls at night and the first person he does that with in the morning. Even if he wakes up in the middle of the night and answers someone else, he’ll still send me another text right after. He’ll give me his pickle whenever he gets them because he knows I love them, even though he does, too. If he sees something on the road that he thinks I’ll like he gets it for me to surprise me with when he comes home.” You can feel yourself starting to cry thinking of all the way Vince has shown he loves you. But you really just wanted to hear those three words. You just wanted that verbal confirmation from him.
“I mean, babe, that’s great, but if he really meant it, wouldn’t he say it?”
You join her on the couch, trying to figure out how to answer. “Not everyone is good with expressing their emotions with words,” you shrug, unable to look at whatever expression she had on her face. “He’s been hurt before, when he’s told a girl that he loved her. I understand why he wouldn’t want to flat out say it to me.” 
You get up, going back to your kitchen to at least fake the need for a glass of water. “Well, what else does he do?” you hear Nikki call over the sound of your tap. 
You swallow, unsure if listing the ways was making you happy or sad. “He asks me to call him when I get home so he knows I’m safe. He’ll snapchat me funny faces when I’m sad because he wants to see me smile. He’ll even leave the guys if I’m upset and stay on Facetime with me until I’m happy. When we’re in the car he has my playlist on because he wants to listen to my music because it makes me happy. He doesn’t have to tell me he loves me.” 
“Yes he does,” you hear from the other room, a voice that wasn’t Nikki’s. You see Vince standing there, bags in hand, Nikki slinking away into the other room to give you privacy. 
“Hey, babe, what are you doing here?” you ask him, giving him a kiss for the first time in what felt like forever, trying to take the bags from him when he pulls away. The two of you walk over to your couch, setting the bags down and hearing clinking from inside. “Can I look inside?”
“No, not yet,” he stops you, taking your hands in his to prevent you from reaching in. “I’ll get everything out. Just, just trust me.” He closes his eyes and takes in a deep breath. “I told you I couldn’t say...it because of the girls I’ve said it to before. And god, I’m the worst for not saying it.  But you deserve so much more.”
“Vince, what are you talking about? I don’t need mo-”
He cuts you off, handing you the first thing in the bag. A bottle of your favorite wine, a note taped to it. “You’re my partner in wine,” you read out to him, laughing at the goofy grin on his face telling you that he was proud of himself. 
A bag of your favorite coffee grounds is placed in your hands next. “Words can not espresso how much you bean to me.” 
A can of your favorite soup. “I ‘canned’ live without you.”
A snack pack of pudding. “Thanks for pudding up with me.” 
There was food item after food item with a note taped to it with a different pun revolving around what he thought about you. He went to the grocery store for all your favorites, handing them to you one by one until he gave you the last item in the bags: a bar of your favorite cheese. “Sorry about being so cheesy.”
You look at him, seeing the embarrassed look on his face. His cheeks were red, unable to make eye contact with you but smiling anyway. “Well, now I don’t have to go grocery shopping,” you joke, him laughing along with you, “Vince, I love this.” 
“And I love you.” 
You can’t help the smile on your face, staring into his green eyes as his expression mirrors yours. “Really? I mean, I knew,” you explain, “But I didn’t think you’d say it. Why now?” 
He smiles at you, taking your hands in his. “Because Nikki shouldn’t have to tell you she loves you because I can’t.” 
“You’re welcome!” you hear Nikki yell from your room, both of you laughing.
“Oh my god,” he lets out at her obvious eavesdropping, his eyes closed, biting his bottom lip. “It’s not fair to you that you told me how you felt and I couldn’t tell you how I really felt.”
“Vince, you don’t have to apologize,” you try to tell him. 
“No, no. I do,” he says, dropping your hands and cupping your face. His thumb traces along your cheekbones as he keeps going. “I chose shitty girls before you, and them hurting me ending up hurting you. I love you, and it shouldn’t have taken me so long to say it. You’re the only one I’ve ever really loved.” He pulls you in for a kiss, soft and sweet. 
“I love you, too.” 
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